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[hellfire--cult]

Edit of Eddie: Sofiiel

Stripper!Eddie x Shy!Fem!Reader

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 (end)

WC: 9.7k

⚠️ +18 MDNI, Stripper!Eddie, shyness towards men, nervousness, talking about traumas, self-esteem issues, fluff of some sort, self doubt.

Plot: You thought you were cursed with your shyness, but after one embarrassing night, you decide it's time to change, and you believe someone might be able to help with that.

Summary: You see someone in a coffee shop, and you make the first move towards a new life.

A/N: I didn't think so many of you would enjoy this story! I hope everything lives up to your expectations, we're gonna go slow with this one, but don't think that Billy and Steve won't participate in this project of yours ;)

As always, all reblogs help, tagging it as well, and I always enjoy reading your comments!

PART 2

Your eyes slowly opened, feeling completely light headed as you tried to focus all around you.

You groaned in pain as you felt a sharp sting in the back of your head and you felt the light above you blinding you, sharply. 

Where the fuck were you?

“Is she awake?” You heard a female voice talking. You tried focusing again and saw Kali’s face over yours and she smiled at you when she saw you open your eyes at her.

“She’s awake!” Kali says and you see more faces trying to come in focus over you, making you whine by how dizzy that made you. You heard Kali protesting to the other people to give you some space as she fanned your face with her hand. 

“W-Where am I?” You asked and slowly but surely, your senses started sharpening again. Below you, there was definitely a bed. Then, all the voices around you were female. And then, you smelt cinnamon, the same one as your scented candle in your room.

“Your apartment. Are you okay? Do you feel sick?” You heard Nancy ask worriedly as she held a bottle of water in her hand. Honestly, you didn’t feel sick, just plain dizzy, as if you had ran out of oxygen for a few minutes. You held onto Kali’s arm and slowly sat up, centering yourself in the room as it began to get in focus for your eyes. 

“Jesus, what happened?” You asked as you grabbed onto Nancy’s bottle and Robin looked at Nancy worriedly and then back at you.

“You fainted.” 

“That much I know Robs.”

“In front of the stripper.” You spat the sip of water you just took, dizziness completely gone now, embarrassment and shame taking over your body as an anxious knot filled in the center of your gut. Barb stepped away from in front of you just in time before she got drenched and you started coughing wildly as Vickie patted your back.

“Oh god, now I am gonna be sick.” You say as nausea fills your stomach thanks to how humiliated you felt. You just remembered his brown eyes, looking at you, getting closer and closer to you. You winced as you tried to imagine his face when you simply blacked out in front of him. How pathetic it must have been for him. 

“Yeah, you’ve been out for thirty minutes.” You groaned loudly at Barb’s words and you looked at Nancy. You were so embarrassed for ruining her night, and even making all of them go through all of this. 

“Nance, I am so sorry. Words can’t describe how stupid I feel for this… I should have waited in the car, or in the bathroom, or away from the stage…” You hid your face in your hands as tears started to fill in your eyes. You felt so weak, so small because of this issue of yours. You made your friends end their fun night because of you.

“No, no! I shouldn’t have even considered a strip club knowing one of my bridesmaids doesn’t do good in a place like that!” Nancy replies, trying to make you realize she didn’t mind, but you were too far gone to notice that. How many more nights will you screw up in this way?

You remembered your prom night. Because of your shyness, you were always the target for bullying, and boys didn’t help at all with your case. They pulled your hair, got close to your face to tease you, grabbed your shoulders, caged you against the wall just to see you squeal in fear. 

So that night, you decided to try and be brave, only to be cornered inside the boy’s bathroom by three guys from the soccer team. They were telling you they could cure you if you’d only suck their dicks. That was all you needed. Thankfully, Kali smashed into the bathroom with a fire extinguisher and sprayed the men on the spot. She had seen you being pulled aside, and in your shock, you didn’t pull away, nor ran. 

That was a dangerous situation, but this one… This one was plainly humiliating. Embarrassing. Pathetic. 

The poor guy was just doing his job, and he had to see you crumble in front of him, just by his mere sight and touch. He was supposed to make you feel desired, and you cannot even imagine how he felt when you just fainted on him. Eddie. Poor Eddie.

“Hey, if he didn’t catch you in time, you would have hit your neck on the back of your chair.” You looked up to see Robin speaking to you.

“He helped me?”

“He even carried you to my car. Told me to drive safe and all.” Robin didn’t tell you, just to spare you from more embarrassment, but she explained your condition to Eddie and Joyce who were feeling responsible for what happened to you. The guy looked confused really, but didn’t press more than that and just waved all of you off. 

You were looking at Robin and then you looked at your arms. He had wrapped his arms around you, and lifted you in bridal style to carry you away. You sighed as you cursed at yourself for only being able to tolerate something like that when you were completely out and not conscious at all. 

You wanted to feel hands like that awake. You wanted to be able to enjoy a handsome man pampering you. You wanted to kiss a hot guy. You wanted and needed to be fucked with someone you felt attracted to, completely, not just barely. 

“Oh, sweetheart don’t cry… It really isn’t a big deal…” Kali wiped your tear away, one you didn’t even feel dropping, but she didn’t understand. It is a big deal. No one understands you, no one knows what this feels like. No one knows how you feel about this. No one gets it. 

You just wished you could be normal.

It’s been a week since that night, and you tried. You were seriously trying. 

But you were now in your fourth coffee shop, parking your car, because the last three you’ve been at, the baristas, were young men. As soon as you entered the doors and saw the counter and the man behind it, you immediately left. 

After that night, it seemed as if your shyness and your nervousness only worsened just by how humiliating those events were. You couldn’t even turn on your camera at the team meetings of your workplace, which thankfully, it was 100% from home. You worked at a big company just as an administrator, and it paid well so you didn’t complain.

Now, on a friday, you look forward to the afternoon coffee, and you were happy to see that in your fourth coffee place, you found a woman at the front counter. You walked towards her as you looked into your wallet, looking for cash.

“Hi! What can I get you?” You heard her cheery voice and you looked up with a smile.

“Hello, um… Just a medium coffee with a bit of creamer please.” She nodded at you and you handed her the money so she could go and start preparing you coffee. She asked for your name and told you she would call you once it was done. You nodded at that and stepped aside, grabbing your phone to scroll through your instagram. 

You smiled when seeing the stories of Robin. She was posting about how boring her classes were at nursing school. Then you jumped over to Nancy’s which was a picture of her and Jonathan. Your smile faltered a little at that.

Jonathan was a handsome guy, and when you met him you didn’t feel that immense shyness you always felt. You never knew why, because deep inside you, you knew he was attractive. Yet, you could shake hands with him, and engage in conversation as if it were a natural thing for you to do. 

A deep voice came from next to you, and your eyes widened. You knew that voice. You recognized it, because last time it vibrated so close to your ear, it had settled in the deep of your stomach. You slowly side eyed, turning your head just a bit and you held in the gasp as you felt your body grow a cold sweat. 

“The usual, Princess.”

Oh fuck. Shit. Son of a bitch. 

You could see his hair tied up in a bun, some specks of unshaved beard covered his jaw, and the smell. You could smell the wooden cologne. Kind of leathery like. You turned your head as you felt your whole face turn a deep shade of red, and it almost felt like it moved all over your body. 

Your fingertips felt like they were sweating, and the knot in your stomach was moving all around. She took his order and you stepped aside trying to create some space between you two. You looked away so he wouldn’t recognize your face, because if he did, you were sure you would die. 

Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest and you were looking at the barista’s every move. She was preparing your coffee now, and his presence was just overwhelming you entirely. You wanted, no, NEEDED, to bolt right out of there. You could hear him yawn as he stood next to you, and your nerves were going insane right now. You heard your name being called out, snapping you out of your almost panic attack. 

“Thank you…” You said almost in a whisper as you took the coffee in your hands. You didn’t waste a single second, turning away and rushing out of the shop, taking a deep breath in of the clear oxygen. Now, you don’t really think it would be adequate to fill your body with caffeine when your nerves were this bad, but you already paid for it. 

Your heart was on the verge of exploding as you took many deep breaths in. You should apologize to him, or say thank you for helping your friends carry you out of the club, but here you were, running once again. Like you always did. 

But is it something you really want to do? Do you want to keep running?

You turned around and saw him through the window, taking slow sips of his coffee as he looked through his phone. His profile was already making you sweat by just how good looking he was, without even trying, with the afternoon sun hitting him in the right places. 

You wanted a normal life. You wanted to be able to feel attraction. You wanted to be kissed passionately. You wanted physical touch. You wanted to be normal, simply normal. 

So your feet moved. They guided you towards the doors again. They guided you into the shop. The girl looked at you with confusion over the counter and then you turned, going towards the booth where the man was seated at.

Eddie though, didn’t even acknowledge you. He was tired, too spent from last night's show. He was grabbed onto more than usual, and he had done several personal lap dances. Everything was good money of course, and he knew he sealed his fate into being the favorite one the moment he agreed on being physical with clients. No more than a kiss, or some holding, but that made him wanted. 

He didn’t mind really, but when the ladies would take advantage of that and touch him, when they knew they shouldn’t, drove him up a wall. He wasn’t going to lie and say he didn’t bang one or two clients per week, sometimes for money, sometimes for his pleasure. This was all his doing. Joyce was against them doing that, but his colleagues, and himself, found out that their dicks can get them two thousand a night.

He didn’t even notice until a shadow casted over him, that made him look up, that you had sat right in front of him, making him frown in confusion because… You weren’t looking at him. You were looking downwards and he could almost see the steam coming out of one of your ears.

“Um–”

“I’M SORRY.” He jumped at the high pitched loud tone, almost a squeak, making him shake his coffee a little bit on his hand. 

“Jesus christ!” It was too late for loud noises, and much more for apologies he didn’t have a clue on why they were being said to him. And from a girl who wasn’t even looking at him. You were trembling, looking at your lap, because that apology came out way too embarrassing for your own good, and now you wanted nothing more but to crawl and disappear into thin air.

You stayed silent, trying to form words in your throat, but you could only feel the lump forming, and you cursed at yourself internally because you thought you were making progress by sitting in front of him, but now that you made a fool out of yourself, once again, you wanted to run away. But his voice stopped you.

“Holy shit, it’s you. The girl who fainted.”

Your blood went cold. Of course you would be remembered as that. Shit, everyone that night will remember you as the pathetic girl who fainted in the arms of a stripper. Your knuckles went white on your lap as you gripped them tightly, trying to fight the urge of running away. Your voice was still not found but there was no need because he kept talking.

“Are you alright? After that night?” He was asking for your wellbeing. This guy who didn’t even know you was asking if you were doing okay. You had to answer, you had to say something. Anything, just move your lips, make the air come out.

“Yes…” You almost mumbled it, but it was something. Eddie was squinting at you, his phone long forgotten on the table as he inspected you. He gave a small smirk, even if you weren’t looking at him, he just couldn’t help himself.

“And I thought your friend made up a horrible excuse for you that night, saying you were shy against men. I can see that she wasn’t lying.” Your body jerked up at that, your eyes widening and your head lifting up slightly, focused on his cup and he was finally able to see your face. You were beet red, making him smirk even more.

“Y-You were doing a great job! It’s m-my fault for trying to be strong and staying there!” Did you just say he was doing a great job? That formally? To a stripper? You winced at your words, ready to stand up and walk away but the sound of his laughter stopped you, and you wanted to look up, but you knew that it was going to make you freeze in place. 

“Thank you darling. I guess I appreciate the feedback.” He noticed how you jumped slightly at the nickname he gave you and he cleared his throat. “I guess I do, in fact, owe you an apology myself…”

At that, your eyebrow raised up, not looking at him, but staring at his phone this time, just trying to not meet his gaze at all. Why would he need to apologize to you?

“You didn’t do anything w-wrong!” You stuttered at the last words, but you were surprised to have found your voice quicker this time. 

“Well, Billy told me that there was a girl that needed her friend’s help to put a bill in his jeans. He told me what you looked like and what table you were at… You were my target that night.” You froze at those words, and the knots in your belly started tangling even more, not understanding why he would target you like that. “Shit, I didn’t know you actually had a problem with men, I mean… You were at a strip club, Sweets.” 

You couldn’t help the small huff that escaped your lips with the hint of a smile on your lips. It did sound quite stupid if he said it like that. He stared at your reactions, taking a sip out of his coffee and you could see the movement from the corner of your eye, reminding you that you have some coffee in your hand as well. You took a sip too, feeling the warmth in your throat, soothing out the dryness this interaction provoked in you.

“It was… My best friend’s bachelorette party…” You explained to him and he was still not understanding where you were getting at, so he stayed silent for you to elaborate which made your nerves peak up again. “I-I didn’t want t-to bail on her.” You stuttered again as you talked about your feelings to a stranger who grinded on you a few nights back.

“Ah. I see. Next time you go to a place like that, wear a sign or something around your neck. You know, like the dogs that wear a harness that say ‘Nervous’.” Those words coming out of his mouth finally made you open your mouth as a giggle came out. You covered your mouth to stop your laughing but he caught you way off guard.

Eddie was still staring at you, a bit of pride in himself as he saw you laughing because of him, and he was glad you got to loosen up a little bit in his presence. He was curious, way too curious for his own good. Ever since he got this job with his friends, roommates even, all the women he met were straightforward, knowing what they wanted, hands roaming without fear all over his body. Yet you are here, embarrassed for laughing in front of him.

And your eyes still never met his.

“Why did you approach me darling?” 

Your giggles stopped immediately, and your eyes slightly widened as you put your hands around your coffee again. Your heart was simply exploding now, and the tips of your fingers were tapping on the cup, trying to steady a normal breathing pace in your lungs, in sync. You were being engulfed by flames, and it worsened each time you remembered that his gaze was on you.

But you didn’t want to feel like this, which irritated you even more.

“I-I want help.” At that, Eddie raised his eyebrow in question, but he rested against the booth, waiting for you to continue. You stayed silent for a minute, noticing that he was being patient with you, acknowledging the fact that this wasn’t easy for you to do, and the knot in your stomach detangled just a bit, loosening up enough for you to keep talking. “I want to be normal.”

Eddie’s eyebrows twitched at that. You didn’t think you were normal just because you had this situation going on with yourself. He felt a little sad for you, and he couldn’t even imagine for how long you really struggled with this. 

“I want– I want to be able to have a normal life…” You pressed on and he was slowly understanding where you were getting at, and he looked at your cup, seeing your name written on it. 

“Right… And you want my help with what exactly?” 

“I want to fight this… this shyness… I don’t want to be nervous anymore. I am tired of making a scene or embarrassing myself because of it. I don’t want my friends to accommodate to my needs everytime we go out…” You didn’t even notice that you did not stutter once at those statements. Statements you were fully aware of yourself and you were fed up with. Eddie, obviously, noticed, raising his eyebrows up, losing themselves under the small fringe of his curls.

He was looking at you, wondering how this day turned completely on its axis and now you were sitting in front of him, shaking like a deer in front of some headlights, but still voicing your worries out. He was skeptical really, not knowing if this was all a farce to get in his pants for free. 

He wasn’t going to lie, he would fuck you for free. You were pretty, but you didn’t make an effort to show that off. Your clothes were bland, your make up was just some blush on your cheeks, and your hair was tied up in a ponytail. 

But if your intentions were to sleep with him, you wouldn’t have said what you said next.

“I w-will pay you! I just want to– be able to talk eye to eye…” His heart clenched slightly at that. You didn’t want him to teach you sexual stuff, or something of the sort… You just wanted to be able to talk to him properly, or any man for that matter. He gave a small nod, as if in thought, even if you weren’t even looking at him. 

His life has been very monotonous lately. For the past year to be exact. It was work, women, eat, sleep, shower, and do it all over again, every single day. He didn’t know if his roommates felt the same, but he knew that Steve started pottery classes, and then Billy had gotten the hobby of playing video games in his free time. 

Yet Eddie didn’t have the motivation to do anything. Until now. 

This was new, intriguing, and something that might ignite some fire in his everyday mundane life. So he reached his hand out towards you, and you looked at his ringed fingers with wide eyes, wondering what was going on.

“First things first. Presentation. I’m Eddie.” He said to you and his hand was waiting patiently. You gulped as you stared down at it, but then realization hit you. He was going to help you with this, and a flame of happiness ignited in you, slowly reaching out and putting your palm against his. You noticed the different size and the warmth of his skin, sending a shiver down your spine.

You gave him your name in a stutter and he grinned when he closed his hand on yours and saw you stiffen slightly, so he softened his grip, to then move your hands up and down gently in greeting. He pulled away, and you put your hand onto your lap as quickly as you could. Your whole body was ablaze, still looking at his phone to not clash eyes with him. 

“I-I can pay you–”

“Nothing.” Your eyes widened at that, raising an eyebrow up in question and you almost raised your head to look at him. “You look really shaken by this, and taking money from you doesn’t really sit right with me… And who knows, maybe this will blossom into an odd friendship.” 

Those words slipped out of his mouth before he could help it, and a slight pink tint formed on his cheeks. He really did crave for another friendship, already getting tired of just being with Billy and Steve. They are great, and they are almost like brothers, but maybe that was the thing. It was just those two, and no one else. 

You on the other hand turned a deep red at that, feeling your heart banging in your chest, not being able to take it anymore and you grab his phone, startling him completely and his eyes went wide at the action, but you didn’t move from the seat. You opened the dial without unlocking the phone, sliding up from the right corner of the screen and you pressed your cell phone number in there. 

You slid it back to him and stood up, not being able to handle the pressure of his stare any longer and he held onto his phone to look down at the number on it. His eyebrows centered in the middle with a frown and he raised his head up only to see you gone, turning his head around until he saw you rushing out of the shop through the window and into your car. 

He looked down at his screen, biting the inside of his cheek. He looked at his cup and saw the number of the barista under his name. She had tried many times to put her number down in his cup, but he never saved it on his phone. He looked down on your number, a scoff coming out of his lips.

“Hmm...”

You had been screaming into your pillow for the past half hour. 

You cannot believe what you did two hours ago. You gave your number to a stripper. To a goddamn stripper. And you even asked for help with this issue of yours, but what if it came out wrongly? What if he thought you were asking him to help you sexually? It didn’t really feel like that but what if you didn’t read the air right?

It was an impulse. A goddamn impulse, but you were fine, it was all going to be okay, because you left your phone, and maybe he doesn’t even indulge in this stupidity of yours and move on, or maybe he deletes it by mistake and everything will be back as it was before.

You stopped screaming at that.

But you didn’t want to go back to before. That’s why you took that chance, and you have to look at the positive side of all of this. You sat in front of him, you talked to him, you shook his hand! You shook a handsome man’s hand! That’s improvement, a lot of it. Yes, if you put your mind to it, maybe you can change this stupid part of yourself.

You remembered his voice. Deep but with a hint of mischief behind it, and then those words that sounded hopeful yet sad. How he managed to say that the two of you could become friends in the meantime. You wondered what his daily life was like now, outside of his job. Who did he live with? How old is he? What is his favorite food?

You grabbed your phone as you turned to look up at your ceiling. You unlocked your phone to start scrolling through TikTok. You smiled at all the dog videos that showed up on your For You page and saved all those cooking and baking tips you found. You were startled from your trance of scrolling when your phone started ringing. The beautiful sound ‘The Shire’ from The Lord of the Rings filled your ears which helped a lot to the anxious feeling of talking on the phone. Who did that nowadays?

You looked at the number and it was not saved on your phone. Should you answer? Maybe it’s a telemarketer. Did you forget to pay a bill? Internet? No, you paid all of those. Your eyes widened in realization.

What if it’s him?

You were about to start trembling and in your fuss you pressed the Answer button and you almost cried out as you started hearing the other side of the phone. 

‘We are calling to ensure you have the best communication serv–’

And you hang up, fucking automatic calls. You let out a sigh of relief until you felt that it wasn’t that much of relief at the end of it. Something felt uneasy within you, like something was not right. A certain disappointment maybe? Did you want him to be the one calling you? But that would be too much for you to handle, definitely. 

You sighed, sitting up on the bed, scratching your head until a soft ‘Ting’ on your phone caught your attention. You looked down on the notifications and it was a message from an unknown number. Your eyes widened when you looked into the text preview.

‘I believe that in text form, you won’t be too shy to talk to me.’

Your heart got caught in your throat as you begin to cough desperately. You weren’t expecting something from him so soon, and it startled you completely. You held onto your chest as you read the text again, and again and again… You didn’t feel the blood flowing at the tip of your fingers, his image coming up in your head. His side profile of today, but then his face up close to you, in the middle of purple and pink lights in the club.

You clenched your eyes tightly, trying to move the images away. You took a deep breath in and unlocked your phone, heading over to the text. First, you saved his contact, because you might forget right? Then you put in a personal notification message because you just felt like it, but maybe if you do that, you can also put in a special ringtone as well? You didn’t do that for everyone but you were feeling like–

You were stalling. You were definitely stalling. 

You gulped as you went back to the screen, now with the title ‘E’ because you didn’t want to receive a message from him when you were with your friends. They knew his name, so might as well tell them it’s Eleanor from work. 

You started typing ‘Hi’ but he didn’t start with hello, so you erased that. Maybe a ‘how are you’ or ‘how has your day been going’ but that really doesn’t sound right either, he didn’t ask you that at all. You deleted it again and were about to type in again until you saw the three dots that signaled you that he was typing.

‘Even on text? Damn, I wonder how many texts you just wrote and deleted.’

He caught you, red handed, and you took a deep breath in, pushing your embarrassment away as you started typing.

‘Not many.’ You were already biting the skin on the side of your left thumb thanks to your pumping heart, which only increased its beats every time you saw the three dots from his side.

‘Really? I bet you wrote ‘Hey handsome’ and deleted it, right?’

You giggled at that, feeling your nerves loosen up a bit at his cheekiness and you typed once more.

‘Oh, sure, whatever strokes your ego.’

‘That hurt princess.’ 

Your breath hitched at the endearment. 

‘You’ll survive.’

‘Black is not a color.’

‘Not you too with that bullshit. 🙄’

‘But it’s not, it’s a shade, as well as white!’

‘It’s my favorite color, a color, and that’s final.’

You giggled at the banter you were creating with Eddie over some texts. It’s been a week since you saw him and it’s been a week since you both started texting each other. They’re not long conversations really, just an hour a day or less, and it always starts with Eddie asking you something about yourself.

On Monday, it was your work. He made a lot of funny comments about how he is an accountant when you knew what his job actually is. Then Tuesday was about your favorite animal, in which you said Dog and he said bats. He told you he actually has a swarm of bats tattooed on his right forearm. Then food on wednesday, and favorite drink on thursday.

Today was about your favorite colors. 

Yours was red, sometimes purple, while Eddie claims that his favorite color is black. You were having fun messing with him, smiling at the phone as the nerves in your belly were kept to a minimum. You were surprised how loose you got when you received his texts, and it was almost as if you were excited when they did. 

“Why are you so smiley?” You blinked and looked up, completely forgetting you were having coffee with Robin at the Starbucks near your apartment complex. Robin actually got an apartment three floors down from yours and you were happy that you have a close friend as a neighbor. 

“Oh, um… El sent me a meme.” You lie, feeling your chest compress at it. You didn’t want to lie to your friends, but you were doing this behind their backs because you didn’t need the encouragement. You wanted to do this on your own, without the need of your friends overprotecting you as if you were a piece of paper that might rip apart at any comment a man does to you.

“Right…” She sipped on her coffee as another notification made you look down at the screen, and you went pale at what you saw. It was a message from Eddie, yes, but the anxiety started filling your stomach as you read what he wrote to you.

‘We should hang out this weekend. Test the waters.’

He was asking you out. Well not asking you out, more like hang out, as friends, but, oh no. You were feeling nauseous, the memory of his face, and his stomach showing coming up in your mind. You don’t think you will be able to tolerate it, and you don’t even know if you can trust this guy. You haven’t told your friends about Eddie, and if you went missing or something–

“IT’S EDDIE.” You blurted out, startling Robin, your panic winning completely over you. She spat the coffee, coughing loudly as she punched her chest a few times, trying to recover herself. You on the other hand were slightly panting from the anxiety that was eating you up, but the need to feel protected won you over. 

“What!?” 

“I AM TALKING WITH EDDIE.” You said again loudly, making various customers turn their heads at the commotion and Robin made you lower your voice with a big ‘shh’ and a hand movement. 

“Eddie… Who the fuck is Eddi– Oh, WHAT?!” Now the customers turned their heads at Robin’s explosion. You were clutching your phone to your chest and you could feel your eyes beginning to heat up from the tears that were threatening to leave them. 

“I know, I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to lie, but-but–” 

“Why are you talking to–” Robin looked around and bent over a little closer to whisper to you. “To the stripper?! Are you nuts?!”

“I mean– I might? I don’t know? I–” You took a deep breath in, closing your eyes as Robin sighed in front of you. “I just need help… Being normal…” Robin’s eyes turned those into sad ones as she looked up at you. She stood up, putting her hand out for you to take.

“Tell me all about it while we head back to your place.”

“Yep, you are definitely crazy.”

You were pacing back and forth while Robin watched you from the couch, looking down at all the texts you’ve sent Eddie. But even if she did call you crazy, your friend was proud of you because she never thought you would tell a man about your favorite things. She also didn’t expect this Eddie guy to actually be gentle with you, never crossing a line, never flirting with you.

She wondered if his intentions were pure and when you told him he didn’t accept the money, Robin was baffled. Now, the true reason as to why you had told her about this, is because of his last message. He didn’t pressure you into saying yes, so that was a green flag, and it also lets someone know who you were with last in case the worst case scenario happens.

“I know I am crazy Robin, I fucking know, it was an impulse–”

“But I think it’s working… I mean, maybe he can actually figure out what’s going on in that head of yours.” You gulped at that and continued pacing. Nothing traumatic with men happened to you, the absence of your father and the multiple cheating on your mother helped, but it didn’t explain the reason as to why it was almost as if you were terrified of men. Attractive men at that. 

You had of course the bullying at primary school, and then all the way to high school, but you cannot really pinpoint anything too cruel. 

“Robin, I– I don’t even know him. What if he makes a move on me?” You would probably pass out and he would have access to do whatever. You really don’t know the guy, even if he seems trustworthy on text messages, that’s just what they are. Text messages. He could be lying, he could be pretending to be something he is not, and you can’t read his face or his movements. Not that you would if you were in person either, because you can’t fucking look at him.

“I don’t think– Look, invite him to the bar three blocks down, just the two of you, and don’t make a fuss about it. He seems cool, and he never overstepped from what I’ve seen… Nothing with a double meaning either.” She was trying to reassure you, to help you with it. For some reason Robin had a feeling that you didn’t cross paths with the stripper again just out of pure coincidence. She was a fair believer of fate, and karma. 

“I– I mean it is public, a bar.” She gave you a nod and handed you the phone. You took it into your trembling fingers, looking down at the messages.

“Yes, and you have me as your emergency contact. You just have to press the lock button 5 times and I know where to get you.” That statement actually calms you a lot. And the fact that you would be at a bar three blocks away from home was also bringing you relief. “Remember, this is not a date… He is not asking you out romantically.”

“Right, I know that, as a friend.” You replied to her, giving Robin a nod as you felt another uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach that you couldn’t describe once more. You looked down at your phone, and licked your lips, gulping loudly as you typed in your response.

‘Does tomorrow at 6, the bar between Monroe ST. and Chadwick sound good to you?’

You almost threw the phone towards Robin, feeling yourself cringe at the risky message you just sent, but if you truly think hard about it, he was the one who sent it first. Robin caught your phone as it trembled in your hand. She heard a popping sound and looked down at the screen, a smirk breaking on her lips.

“Sounds perfect, and I will give you a whole presentation on why Black is indeed a color."

You were trying to calm your nerves as you looked at the watch, every now and then on your phone. It’s already 6:05 PM and he didn’t show. It’s only five minutes late, but maybe he bailed?

But he was the one who asked you, why would he bail? But maybe he regretted it? Oh god, did he have to work today? You invited him without even asking and maybe he has a full night and you didn’t even think of–

“Parking around here is a pain in the ass Princess.” You heard his voice as he passed by you, sitting at the seat of the booth in front of you. You felt your body tensing up, and you were now self conscious of your clothes. But it wasn’t a date, so you dressed normally, and you applied a bit of mascara. You weren’t good at doing your own makeup so you settled for the simplest of things, because if you tried to do something, it would be worse than nothing.

Your eyes immediately drifted to the napkin holder on the side as you tried to gather up courage to talk to him. He sighed and put his phone on the table, right in front of him, which made your gaze drive to that. He did it so that he could see your face instead of your profile, taking note that last time you were together, your eyes didn’t leave his phone.

From your point of view you could see his shirt, which was a black simple t-shirt with an Iron Maiden illustration on it. You wanted to know what he looked like right now, and given from what you could smell of his perfume, he must look nice. 

“Sweets, I need you to cooperate with me here. We talked all week on the phone, I assure you it’s no different than using your voice.” You blinked once and maybe that was the trick. You just have to imagine this is just texting, as if you were reading your messages out loud.

“I-I know that…” The curiosity was killing you at this point, but you wanted to make sure of something first. “Do you work tonight? I didn’t even ask you before…” He was surprised at your question, and he smirked slightly, nodding. Once he realized you still weren’t looking at him, he sighed as he opened his mouth again.

“Yeah, but not till 10 PM. Jason and Billy are on the early shift today.” He explained to you and that is actually a lot of time to talk to him. You didn’t think you would stand being with him, looking at his phone for more than an hour. You felt another presence approaching and you looked up to your side, seeing the waitress coming up.

“Ready to order?” She gave you a small smile and you nodded.

“A beer, please.” She put it down and turned to Eddie, her smile widening as you watched her interact with him. He must really look nice if this woman was smiling like that. Why can't you be like her? Why do you have to be so nervous about it all? You wanted to smile at a cute boy, not barf on him or pass out on the spot.

“Same as her.” Was his short reply. Your gaze went back down towards his phone as the waitress retreated to get your drinks. You wondered how he looked at her. Did he smile? Did he wink? Did he keep a serious face on? “Didn’t take you to be a beer kind of girl.”

“Oh, well, it’s really my drink of choice, but a sweet drink I like too sometimes.” You replied, keeping your gaze on his phone, imagining that everytime he talked to you, a small ‘Ting’ of a notification sounded in your ears.

“I like beer too, but I am more into the bitter kind of stuff.” He replied to you and you now burnt all over because you didn’t know how to keep the conversation flowing. Gladly, the waitress returned quickly with the two bottles of beer opened and ready to drink. You grabbed yours and saw Eddie’s hand wrapping around his own bottle, leaning it towards you. You gulped and clinked your bottle to his.

“To cure your shyness sweetheart.” 

You couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on your lips at that small sweet touch. Giving a cheer for you, even in the short lapse of knowing each other, made your heart calm down just a tiny bit as you took your first sip of the bottle. Eddie caught on the smile you gave and was about to talk when your phone rang.

You looked at the caller and saw it was Robin. Your eyes widened, realizing you didn’t tell her you were already with Eddie. It was kind of a safe protocol, tell her you arrived, tell her he arrived, and keep her updated if you remembered to do so. You had sent her your live location as well, keeping you safe at all times. You declined the call and immediately sent her a message to tell her you were with Eddie already and that everything seemed ok.

Eddie though, was wide eyed, staring at you.

“Was that the flute of The Shire?”

You blinked at your phone and you almost looked up thanks to your surprise. He liked The Lord of The Rings? You weren’t a super fan of it, but the soundtrack had captivated you since you were a kid. 

“I, yes–”

“Holy shit… Look, I only got my little brother to talk this with, and– I just never expected you to like something like that.” He replied, a wide grin on his face. You gulped, a blush on your cheeks. So he has a brother, another small detail of his life.

“I could say the same about you…” He chuckled at that, nodding at the thought.

“Never saw a Stripper being a total nerd?” He replied and you snorted at that, followed by a laugh, covering your mouth with your hand. He was thinking, wondering of a way to get you to look at him. “Is it your favorite movie Saga?”

“Oh, um… No, not really. Harry Potter is my favorite.” He was surprised at that answer, taking a sip of his beer, tapping his finger on the table. He didn’t know much about it, but he never really took the time to watch the movies chronologically. He had an idea of the main story, of course, but never knew the details.

“I like the fifth movie, the one with the hippogriff.” He said and your eyebrows pulled to the center in a frown at that.

“That’s the third movie…” You replied at that and he scratched his head, thinking hard as he tried to remember the small details.

“Really? Then wait, the fifth one is not the one with the snake right?” He tried again and you felt something in your belly, something like annoyance but not quite. 

“You never watched them correctly?” He shrugged at that.

“Never found the time, or cared enough to do so… Plus, the scenery is nothing like The Lord of the Rings.” And Eddie’s eyes immediately widened, his voice gone, and his hand clenching against the bottle in his hand.

“Okay, first of all, the scenery is fucking amazing, the shots are beautiful and they got them in real places and added CGI on them. Then, the soundtrack I admit, is nothing like The Lord of the Rings, but you can’t deny that all of the music in the movies are nostalgic and majestic. Also, the character designs are incredible, outfit wise and then we have all the spells! Everything is magical from the first movie to the last!” You replied to him with exasperation. You knew about Harry Potter, and you weren’t going to let him talk about your favorite thing like that.

“Ah, yes, I am not shaming it sweets, I just prefer the latter. Plus, I never understood that part of the movie where the bad guy returns from a diary? I mean…” He continued, trying to not show his surprise to you so you wouldn’t stop. You took another sip and continued talking.

“That would be the second movie, and it was a figment of a memory implanted in the diary. The diary was part of Voldemort’s soul, a horrocrux which helped him be sort of immortal.” You pressed on, throwing your knowledge at him. 

“Immortal?”

“He has seven horrocruxes in total, so he split his soul in seven parts. You had to destroy all seven in order to finally be able to kill him properly. You have to watch all of the movies in order to understand all of this! Or read all of the books!” You finished your blabbering with almost a pant.

“Sweets.”

“What?” You scoffed out and he chuckled, smiling at you.

“You’ve been talking to me, looking at me in the face, since you started ranting about Harry Potter.”

You froze, realizing that your eyes were looking into his brown ones. His hair was down, over his shoulders, the stubble you saw that day on his chin was gone, freshly shaved, and over his shirt he had a black leather jacket on. His dimples were showing as he smiled at you, and the knot in the stomach was there, it definitely was, urging you to run away.

But it didn’t urge you to look away. 

He squinted slightly as he inspected you. You weren’t looking away, which is a good sign, but you stopped talking all together. He was thinking, licking the inside of his bottom lip as he thought.

“What’s your favorite movie? Not Saga, movie.” He asked and you slightly snapped out of your trance, absorbing the way his mouth moved as he talked to you.

“T-Titanic.” He rolled his eyes at that and you slumped slightly as an angry frown came to your eyebrows again.

“Really? That cliché sweetheart?” Your mouth almost hung open at his words, feeling offended by him saying that about your favorite film.

“It’s a fucking masterpiece!” You replied to him and he sighed, leaning on the table as he took a sip of his beer again, and you followed afterwards to wet your dry throat.

“Indulge me, how is that romantic movie a masterpiece?”

“Well, I am noticing you are not the romantic type of guy, but looking past that, the scenes? The music and ambience are outstanding, and for it being a movie of 1997, it was so amazingly done! Not to mention that James Cameron was the first ever person to get clear images of the actual wreckage.” You replied, taking another sip and he was still looking at you.

He lied to you. He also thought Titanic was a masterpiece. But he came to realize something, but he needed to test something else first, just to make sure that his suspicions were correct.

“So you just said I am not the romantic type of guy… Does that mean you are? I mean, I want to understand right now, but with this thing you got going on… Did you ever… do anything?” He asked you, actually curious about it and you felt the knot in the stomach form once more, the lump in your throat suddenly blocking your voice and you immediately looked down towards his phone again, a deep crimson covering your cheeks.

“It’s… Not that I am a virgin– I don’t…” And Eddie’s head almost made a ‘ding’ sound. It had clicked the moment you stared into his eyes without noticing and you talked about something you liked. 

“I know what’s going on.” He softly muttered, very low but you could hear it, your eyebrows frowning at that. “Also, I didn’t bring my powerpoint presentation, sorry about that, but Black is a color, I mean, I am wearing it all right now.” He was at this again? You looked up at him, completely wide eyed, not believing he was still adamant about black being an actual color.

“Seriously Eddie, you can google it and it will tell you it’s a shade! I took art lessons in school, and the professor was always very strict on not calling white and black colors!” You were looking at him again. He nodded in thought and tapped the table, slumping back against the booth. He was staring at you, deep in his own mind, and you suddenly grew nervous at his stare. “What?”

“I know what’s happening here, in your mind that is.” You blinked in surprise at that, the statement taking you completely off guard.

“What do you mean?”

“Whenever you are confident about something you know, you have no trouble talking to me. You have no trouble talking to me about things you are passionate about, or have experience in.” 

You were dumbfounded. You never thought of something like that happening to you, but now some things clicked inside your head. You didn’t talk with your male coworkers, no… But when a new hire would enter the company and you had to train them? You had no problem. Then when meeting Jonathan, he was attractive, yes… But… you were excited that Nancy is happy with him.

“Holy shit…” You muttered with wide eyes and he nodded at you with a small smile appearing in his lips to then fade away.

“Yeah… But it means that your confidence level is low. Like, confidence in yourself. That’s why you can barely talk sometimes, or you don’t look up to meet my gaze, or well… looked up, past tense.” He smiled at you, and it made your cheeks flush, but still your head was spiraling at his words. 

You weren’t confident in yourself?

“You mean… like my self-esteem?” You asked, and he sighed, giving you a small nod which made your stomach sink.

“I don’t know about your past, and honestly you don’t have to tell me. But maybe we can do some baby steps…” 

“Baby steps?” He took a sip of his beer and nodded, leaning on the table as he put his hand out to start counting with his fingers.

“First, why don’t you wear makeup? Is it because you are allergic or…?” 

“Uh, no… I’m not very good at it.”

“Have you tried tutorials?” You shook your head, a small feeling of shame coming up your throat. “Okay, so that’s step one. Watch some, practice. I am not saying you need makeup, but it helps a lot with your ego. Trust me, when I put on eyeliner I feel like I can conquer the world.” He says with a chuckle and you tilt your head with curiosity pricking at the tip of your tongue.

“You wear makeup?”

“Hell yeah, makes me look pretty.” He smiles at you and you couldn’t help but laugh at his words. You couldn’t believe this man in front of you had a job like the one he has. “Step two, your clothes too.”

“What’s wrong with my clothes?” You say with an offended tone and he just stares at you.

“Seriously? You wear bland colors. Put a little bit of sparkle in it, something you might feel sexy in, or pretty, but you have to feel it. You don’t dress for others, only for yourself.” You tried to remember your closet, and you hated to admit he was right. All your shirts were simple, none of them were tank tops, none of them had nice cuts on the cleavage, or were tight… Your jeans were all the same, and you never wore dresses or skirts, no matter if you really wanted to.

You just never thought you’d look good in them.

Oh fuck… He actually might have found the problem. 

“Third, be confident in your voice. We’re going to slowly work on it, but I think you are headed in the right direction, just not quite.” He replied to you and he watched how your face contorted into confused frowns and then understanding ones as if you were realizing so many things in your head. 

“You mean to be able to, for example… Ask things?” He pointed a finger at you with a smile to his face.

“And there’s the first one. Yes… Till now I was the one engaging in conversations, being in text form or here. I was the one asking you all the questions.” You gave him a nod in understanding, feeling the knot in the stomach not so strongly as before. He is attractive, yes, but he is not making moves, or comments, or anything to put you in a nervous state. The nervousness was still there, and you still struggled to keep eye to eye contact, but you were facing him.

“I see… So, I gotta go shopping then?” You say with a small smile on your face and he chuckles at you, nodding, taking a sip of his beer.

“Remember, dress for you. Not for the other people around you. If you feel confident in it, then it’s all that matters. By confident, I don’t necessarily mean comfortable, but that can also help.” You were staring at him as if you had found a personal god of some sort. This man, this male stripper, was giving you better advice than any therapist ever gave you, than your FRIENDS ever gave you in fact. 

You were grateful for them, but they never understood that you wanted to get better. Instead, they always made sure to make you comfortable whenever you all went out together, always protected you when men approached your group, but never once helped you make the leap of getting better, of trying to be normal like them. They just accepted you the way you are.

But you didn’t want to be accepted like this. Not anymore.

“What is your favorite movie?” You asked him, and his eyes slightly widened at that, surprised by the change of conversation, but it seems you caught on in what you had to do. He smiled and laid back on the booth.

“Okay, what do you think my favorite movie is? Just by looking at me.” He says, flipping his hair over his shoulder and you giggled, as you looked at him. The nerves in your belly started forming again as you scanned his features, but you were trying to fight against it, feeling your heart hammering in your chest.

You didn’t want to say the wrong thing, and you didn’t want to judge him. But he was asking you himself, right? And if you say something wrong it can be directed as a joke, but maybe he doesn’t like it? Maybe he thinks you are throwing yourself on him? WHat if you say something insinuating to him and you didn’t realize it? What would he say–

“You’re thinking too much about it. Stop.” He was looking at you, and you didn’t even notice you went into a sort of trance, trying to think of the words to say. You shook your head, body filling you up in flames, so before you went into a panic, he continued talking. “Just say the first thing that comes to your head. I am not a person that easily gets offended, sweetheart.”

Those words actually made your nerves settle somewhat, and you took a deep breath in to try to make your heart do the same. You inspected him again and he bit the inside of his cheek to hold back a smirk.

“You look like a… The Notebook fan.” You joked, his eyes going wide, a laugh escaping his lips and you couldn’t help but giggle with him, his laugh being contagious, and the tips of your fingers began to feel warmth once again.

“Oh my god, how did you catch me? Am I that obvious?”

End of part 2

A/N: I promise that... things are just gonna heat up from here on out. This was just to prepare you guys for it. (Billy and Steve will make an appearance soon.) I might change the rating on here to Mature, so if you don't have it enabled, please do.

Taglist is open, comment if you want in or send me an ask ;)

Taglist: @katethetank @mynameismothra @emxxblog @steph-speaks @fantasticmacaroni @aysheashea @sweet-villain @sillypurplemurple @eddiemunsonthoughts @emilyslutface @bookshelf-dust @bibieddiesgf @justheretostan

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fics #stranger things #fanfiction #eddie munson smut #eddie munson ff #eddie munson x fem!reader smut #stripper!eddie munson #stripper!eddie #stripper!au #shy #shy!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fandom #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie x you #eddiemunson #eddie x y/n #stranger things eddie #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson fic #fic recs #eddie fanfic #smut #fluff #slow burn #stripper!billy #stripper!steve

[forbidden-sunlight]

yandere!Alastor with Violet Evergarden!reader scenario: A Wendigo's Violent Love Part Three

Warning: aged-up!reader [in early to late twenties], violence, OOC, spoilers for the first season of the 2024 show, possessive and obsessive behavior, Alastor is in denial of his feelings, possible angst.

There may be possible triggers in this story.

If you do not feel comfortable venturing any further, please hit the back button on your phone or computer and read something much more pleasant than a possible series of unfortunate events.

You are responsible for your Internet consumption!

Hey guys, welcome back to another installment of A Wendigo's Violent Love. I am honestly overwhelmed with how much people like this series, and I wouldn't have come this far without the support of this community. I'd also like to give a special thanks to @a-witch-of-writing-desk, @illuminaresblog, and @yourdoorisunlocked with this piece.

Without their insight and assistance in writing this chapter, it probably wouldn't have been posted until early or late April because of my workload.

The scene where Rosie and Alastor reminisce about how they first met was inspired by a comic illustrated by the incredibly talented @notherpuppet. I won’t spoil what it is exactly, so I will leave the link here.

On another note, the Hobby Horse mentioned here is a direct reference to the weapon in American McGee’s Alice: Madness Returns video game.

So, with that being said, sit back, relax, and let's see what's going on in tonight's broadcast with Hell's one and only Radio Demon!

Reblog to support content creators! ❤️

Part One

Part Two

Cannibal Town was a place unique in the Pentagram. 

Its streets were lined with buildings that possess a vintage charm in which Alastor cannot help but treasure dearly; after all, it closely resembles the era he lived through in New Orleans. Everything in the town fitted like a tailored glove to the charming cannibal; from its automobiles, the residents’ everyday attire, and even how they greeted each other, tipping their hat off or curtseying with a smile. No one is fully dressed without one~! Who could ever think that it isn’t a lovely place to live in, of all the possible places to live in the Pentagram? Just follow Rosie’s rules and you would be fine~!

But the thought of his delightful friend reminded him that he had not come here for an afternoon stroll, nor to enjoy a delicious cup of coffee at a cafe and not even to see if there were any new meat shops open for business. He needed to speak to Rosie, discreetly. 

She was a sensible woman whose establishment, a modest two-story building stationed right where the town’s plaza, offered consultation and other goods for all to enjoy; from the latest fashion trends to comestics to glass displays of ringed pinky fingers, there was something for everyone. No one had to venture outside of the Pentagram for anything. Rosie knew exactly what the citizens wanted and how to protect them. That’s why she is the leader, the one to talk to if anyone wants to do any business here. To set up shop without her permission…well, it was free for all. 

He strode down Main Street, smiling and politely greeting a charming group of ladies who called out to him in surprise, currently feasting on some hapless soul who had walked through without following the town’s dress code. For a moment, his mind wandered to the impossible notion of you walking beside him, your gloved hand tucked into his arm with a parasol raised over your head so that you did not get a sunburn. 

Alastor suddenly stopped. He felt the corners of his mouth twitching uncontrollably, his face burning, his blackened heart thunder against his ribs, and worse off…his eyes. He felt them changing to radio dials, followed by the unpleasant sound of a record scratching. And all because he is thinking about you, and what he-he did to you! He kissed you!

This is preposterous! Ridiculous. Why are these feelings simply getting worse and not better? Blast it all! 

He inhaled slowly, deeply, through his nose and out through his mouth, matching it in tandem with his stride. By the time he reached the entrance to Rosie’s Emporium, Alastor felt his quickened pulse steady itself and he was calm again. Pulling the right stained glass open, he went inside and all the way towards the back of the establishment to see his dear friend sitting behind a counter, consulting a distressed young lady. Rosie was calm and cheerful as always, dressed to the nines with a lovely smile as she handed her client a business card. 

Cannibal Town was truly lucky to have a delightful overlord reign over them.

When she looked up, ready to help the next person in the long line, their eyes met. He smiled, waving at her. She immediately perked up, rising from her chair and weaving through the crowd. Well, more like they willingly stepped aside so that their leader could walk to him, but same difference~!

Oh, that was a good joke, ha-ha!

“Oh Alastor, it’s so good to see you!” Rosie exclaimed, grabbing his shoulders and spinning him around in a small circle. “I haven’t heard from you in a while, I was starting to worry that you forgot about me, though I could forgive you if you fill me in on all of the details that’s happened~!” She grinned. “I hear our princess’ hotel is finally finished with those renovations, all ready to accept all the sinners she could dream of! Oh, and Alastor, you truly haven’t let me down this time! The angel flesh we’ve managed to bring back? Well, not only is it absolutely divine in terms of flavor, but people are coming from miles around just to sample some~! ‘Course, with our limited stock, we need to increase the price just a wee bit. Business is booming, and it’s all thanks to you, my friend~!” She blinked, tilting her head to the side. “Hm? Is everything all right, old chap? You’re never this quiet unless those little gears in your mind are turning~!”

Alastor felt the corner of his mouth twitch. No, he told himself fiercely. Keep yourself calm, tell Rosie that there is absolutely nothing wrong and you just thought about stopping by to pass the time, not because you need her help. And even if you do, desperately, you cannot say it here for all of the world to hear!

But the only sound that escaped his mouth was the chirping of radio static. Nothing else. Nothing except the memory of his mouth being burnt from his earlier actions. His eyes widened slightly. Fuck. He was thinking about you again! When will this madness stop?!

He did not know how Rosie knew that he was in fact, not all right, but her jubilant smile softened, and before he realized what was happening, she was pushing him into a corner of the emporium. Two fuschia-colored lounge chairs and a coffee table with a tea tray resting on top of the dark wood, adjacent to the shop’s windows. This was the very same spot where she had dragged Charlie to sit down and ask why Hell’s princess had come to visit her. 

This was…not a good sign. He thought as he sat down in the chair opposite of Rosie’s, watching his old friend gracefully follow his example. Not at all. 

“Now, what’s going on with you? It’s rare for you to be the strong, silent type.” Rosie said, leaning forward. “I heard bits and pieces about what happened between you and that angel in charge of the exterminators, but I’m not gonna pry. You clearly got more on your mind than angels.” 

Rosie has known Alastor for a long time. He’s a showman with all the flair and music at his beck and call, someone who isn’t all talk with no actions behind them. If there is something he wants, he’ll use his charm to get it before anyone realizes what happened. That’s how he rose through the ranks so quickly when he arrived, after all. But seeing him in a state of stunned silence like this…well, it worried her a bit. So she stood up, removing the tea tray from the coffee table with a snap of fingers, and gestured to Alastor to follow her. 

He did.

Normally her clients were more than happy to discuss their problems within hearing range because it was the usual sort of issues everyone dealt with: a bad-tasting spouse, decoration advice, gossip on the latest trends in the Pentagram and rumors about the other overlords, etc. But Alastor….well, he definitely was not going to open up about his problems just like that. He preferred to keep things private, and there was nothing wrong with that in her opinion. So she led them to the parlor, a cozy little room with vintage furniture and fuschia wallpaper with flowers on them. There were enough enchantments in them to drown out explosions from the outside and keep anyone from hearing their conversation. Of course, no one is that silly to be that disrespectful in her store like that, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

The tea tray popped up on the coffee table, landing with a light clink. Everything was still warm and fresh as she poured the steaming liquid in the cups. One for herself, and one for him. Alastor inclined his head towards her as he accepted the tea. Oh my, the poor dear’s hands were shaking. Now she was starting to get very worried about her friend. 

“Alastor, what’s wrong?” She asked, cradling her teacup and saucer with one hand as she stirred in a pinch of sugar. “Nothing will get past the walls, I swear.  You know me, darling. But I can’t help you if you can’t tell me what’s going on -”

“I kissed her.”

She blinked. “Come again?” She asked. 

“I…kissed someone, Rosie. An associate at the princess’ hotel. We made a deal in my radio tower and I kissed her.” Alastor’s fingers tightened around the handle of his teacup. His ears were pressed flat against his head, his face was flushed bright red and his eyes filtered between red irises and radio dials. Oh, shit. Better take this slowly or he’ll combust. Rosie took a sip of her tea. 

“All right, so you kissed an associate who works at the hotel. Do I know her?”

“Yes.”

“Well, who is she?”

“[First Name].”

“Ah, the girl with the metal arms and the giant…hobby horse?” Rosie thought for a moment. “Couple o’ people said that she was wielding that thing like a baton! Smashed some angel’s heads too!” She chuckled, but noticed the deep sigh leaving her friend as he placed the tea down, reclining against his chair with a gloved hand over his face. She smiled apologetically. “Sorry, sorry. Keep going. Start from the beginning.”

“....She came to the hotel after seeing the commercial everyone made. We were not hiring any staff. Charlie wanted more sinners to come and try to redeem themselves. But [First Name] was stubborn. She and Vagatha did an interview and decided that the best thing they could offer to her was being a groundskeeper. Someone who could keep the place nice and neat, gardening and landscaping. The conditions Charlie laid out to her were that she needed to participate in the activities and make actual progress in changing her ways. In exchange, she’d be given food and board. I tell you, from the moment I saw her, I thought she’d be another form of entertainment~! Imagine, someone who can’t crack an egg, someone who struggles with day to day tasks because she has prosthetics from the Great War! She’s killed people, Rosie, she’s had front row seats to the depravity of humanity and she still believes Charlie’s dream will work! What a joke! What an absolute fool!” He laughed. The sound bounced off of the walls, sending a small chill down Rosie’s spine. 

Alastor wasn’t laughing like when someone tells a dad joke he finds greatly funny or makes an ass out of themselves. He sounded….hollow. Confused. 

“So why is that I feel so terrible for what I had done, Rosie?” He asked. “She had stumbled upon a secret she should have never known and I made a deal with her to keep her quiet. I did what I needed to protect myself. But I can’t get the memory of how she looked at me out of my mind! She was angry, Rosie, and keep in mind that this is a girl who doesn’t show her emotions as easily as others, and she showed me how angry she was towards me! She was disappointed, resentful, and I don’t know what compelled me to kiss her hand but I did because there was some silly notion in the back of my mind, thinking that it would comfort her! How could a kiss do that?! It makes no sense, what I’m feeling makes no sense!” He suddenly straightened himself up in the chair, and he removed his hand from his eyes….just for Rosie to see the frustration and desperation in them. 

“What’s wrong with me, Rosie?” He asked. “Tell me there’s something I can do to forget what I’m feeling right now or I fear I won’t be able to escape this madness!”  

“I don’t think you’d be able to, my friend.” She said. Rosie knew what he was going through because she had been in the same situation too, far too many times and it was because of these experiences that everyone came to her for advice on romance. “Al, my dear silly man…you’re in love with this girl. And it’s pretty clear that this love runs deep. You wouldn’t feel terrible for what you did if you didn’t care about her, right?” 

He looked at her, stunned. “I…beg your pardon, old friend? I….care for her? I love her?” 

Rosie nodded. “You do. And you fucked up your chance at building a proper relationship with her because of this deal you made.”

“That was insurance!”

“And it destroyed her trust in you. You said she was a soldier, right?” When Alastor nodded, she continued. “Well, soldiers need comrades they can trust to watch their backs as much as they need accurate information on enemy forces. You were her comrade, someone she could trust and now…she can’t. That’s why she was angry with you.” She tilted her head. “But it’s up to you if you want to rectify the mistake you made…or let it be the reason why she may never see you in the same way as you see her.” 

“Then teach me, Rosie.” He seethed, leaning forward as he slammed a fist against the table, causing the tea tray to rattle. “Teach me how to forget these feelings because I do not want nor need to love someone to live a fulfilling afterlife. Love makes a person weak! A smile is a more valuable tool than love! It inspires your friends, keeps your enemies guessing, and ensures what comes your way, you are in control!” 

Rosie glared pointedly at him. “Mister, you are most definitely not in control. If you ask me, stifling these feelings towards [First Name] are just going to make things worse.” She sighed. “Do you remember how we first met? You were a fresh face, the newest overlord around the block after you overthrew all the rest. But the big, bad Radio Demon couldn’t even find the meeting room and asked me for directions with that cute little smile of yours. Gotta tell ya, you were a sweetie then, though Carmilla back then…well, she didn’t know what to think of you.” She smiled, leaning forward and placed her hand on top of Alastor’s. “Asking for help and guidance doesn’t make someone weak, old friend. And it isn’t bad to feel love towards someone, even if you are an ace in the hole.” She winked.

 His smile twitched. “I really wish you would tell me what that phrase means.”

“Where’s the fun in that? It’s entertaining to see you keep guessing every time I say it!” Rosie laughed. “So…what are you going to do?”

“Words are cheap, but actions speak the truth. If you’re serious about serenading this girl, then you need your actions to reach her. Keep me posted, okay? You’ve got this.”  That was what Rosie had told him as she walked him out of the emporium, giving him a brief hug and a warm smile before retreating back inside. Now, here he is, walking back to the hotel and back to you.

He had no idea how he was going to face you after what he had done. He gritted his teeth. As much as he wanted to keep his distance from you and be out of his afterlife for good, Rosie….had been correct. Eliminating what he felt would only make things worse, especially if Husker or that pint-sized fool who calls himself the King of Hell try to steal you away from him before he could do anything. 

Shaking his head, Alastor continued his trek through the city and towards the Pentagram’s outer borders, on the hillside where the fluorescents of the hotel glowed in the distance like a lighthouse in a raging storm at sea.

Blessedly the lobby was devoid of any residents or staff when he had returned, so he had assumed that everyone was at dinner or had gone to bed. It wasn’t too late in the afternoon if he recalled correctly, but time was difficult to keep track of in Hell unless one had a pocket watch or one of Vox’s silly little devices, neither of which he had on his person. In an instant he teleported himself to the hotel’s western wing, ready to freshen a bit before cooking up a meal for himself to enjoy in the privacy of his room when he felt a thrum of power vibrate beneath his feet. 

He glanced down, raising an eyebrow at the darkness on the floor before the shadow grinned, showing off a void of bright crimson for a mouth. Ah, yes. This little traitor. Of all the ones he has in his possession, this is the culprit responsible for the crime of stalking you without his consent. 

“Well, well, where have you been today~?” 

The shadow chuckled darkly, rising up from the floor and floated in the air, twisting its smoky body around him like a snake…no. It’s as if this little shit is performing a little dance of his own. But what for exactly? What is the grand occasion? Has someone died? The shadow shook its head, still grinning and conjured a sphere of green flames in its hands. Inside of it, Alastor could see you and Niffty in the kitchen cooking dinner and then the image disappeared, shifting to a scene where the two of you are putting ingredients together for…apple pies? Alastor gritted his teeth. 

He’s gone not even for a day and Lucifer Morningstar has the audacity to make the calls on desserts. Blasphemy! This is absurd! UNACCEPTABLE!

The shadow’s flames then evaporated into nothingness…and in its hand was a single hair ribbon. Your hair ribbon. Swallowing the lump lodged in his throat, he carefully took it from the shadow’s hand, cradling it in the center of his palm. To have something of yours to take for himself, and covet and yearn in silence until the time was ripe was the only method he had to satiate his darker hunger.

To think something as silly as your scent could tide something as fickle as his temper over was baffling, but it was comforting nonetheless.

Alastor’s thumb stroked the worn-out fabric, admiring its crimson hue beneath the fluorescent light of the hotel hallways. Before he could stop himself, the Radio Demon pressed his lips against it. The scent of cinnamon and ink made his mouth water, hungry for more than just a hair ribbon to pocket as a trophy. But like all good things and in the art of being a clever serial killer, patience is key. It shouldn’t be too difficult to lure his prey into his arms. After all, he is a true gentleman.

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#forbidden-sunlight #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #alastor hazbin hotel #yandere alastor x reader #yandere alastor #radio demon #yandere x reader #yandere male #fem!reader #violet evergarden!reader #ns.fw #yandere #cw obsessive behavior #cw obsessive love #tw obsessive behavior #hazbin hotel alastor #tw obsessive love

[gojolatte]

❥ Beg For It, Petal.

» RATING › 18+ [M I N O R S D O N O T I N T E R A C T] » GENRE(S) › smut/fluff » PAIRING(S) › geto suguru x female!reader x gojo satoru » WORD(S) › 2.8k+ » SYNOPSIS › You simply want to make breakfast for your boyfriend's but they have something else in mind. » SMUT WARNING(S) › oral (female receiving), fingering, squirting, gojo & geto kissing, a smidge of dirty talking, allude to sub!geto, allude to anal, praise kink, begging, nicknames (petal, peach, love, pretty girl, honey, & gorgeous), loads of cuddling between the three of you, vacation vibes only! (half-ass edited so beware lol) » POST DATE › 03/21/2024

thank you for reading! & remember: you nice, keep going.❤️ comment/reblogs(s) and like(s) are totally welcomed! › read more work here: masterlist ‹

It’s merely morning when the sun begins to rise, casting a surreal glow into the room. Your body and mind decide to stir as you wake from your slumber. The black curtains hardly catch the glare that hits your face when you try to turn over. It’s then that you realize you’re laid snug on top of Satoru. You can feel his even breath against your neck as he smushes his face against your chest. His grip on your waist is tight and it stops you from being able to turn like you want to.

“Stop.” Satoru groans when you shift your body, leaving Suguru to grab you from his arms (or more importantly, before you can get up to leave). His hold is much firmer than Satoru’, his face is buried in your neck and you can feel him press soft kisses against it.

“Pretty girl,” Suguru chuckles the moment you moan. “Where are you trying to go, honey?” His eyes remain closed, his voice is soft but raspy and for a second, you melt into his embrace as he smothers you closer to his chest. One of the things you love to do is simply listen to this beautiful man talk. His voice is so calming and reassuring that you often fall into this state of bliss. You appreciate the feelings both he and Satoru give you while you're tucked into their arms. A sense of safety and security that everything will be alright. You close your eyes and savor the moment, knowing this feels like home.

“You’re staring, baby.” He wolfishly grins, bringing his hand up to caress your bottom lip. “It’s still early… It's only eight and you’re already trying to leave us.” Glancing over at the clock on the dresser, you realize he's right. It's eight forty-three and honestly, you can use a little more sleep. “Sleep.”

“I want to get up though,” You whine as he only chuckles about how cute you are. You want to get up, take a shower, maybe even get breakfast started for them but you can't do that since Suguru won't let you go. “And It’s not that early, ‘Gu. I could be cooking breakfast right now. I’m hungry.” As if on cue your stomach growls, alerting him of the basic need that hasn't been met. “Suguru…”

“But I’d rather you stay here.” He peeks through his left eye to get a good look at you. The ray of sunlight shining through the balcony door just right to radiate not only the room but you too. An angel in disguise. He can't help but reach up to brush his thumb against the side of your cheek as you lean into his warmth. You can't lie, you love being sandwiched between both of them and right now is no different. “That’s why we hired people for this so you wouldn’t have to move a muscle, honey.”

“But I wanna do it…” You frown, “I-It’s not t-the same-”

“Oh, but It is.” You don't see the smirk present on his face the moment he feels you bury your face in the crook of his neck to attempt to hide. “It's okay to relax. It's your vacation as much as it's ours, Petal. Just sleep.” He says, settling back with you in tow and you lose your breath. You can’t believe how beautiful this man is. He laughs, leaning back to rest his head against the pillows again. You snuggle into his chest, tracing circles on his collarbone.

As time goes on, Suguru’s out like a light again, and you decide to maneuver yourself back between them to get comfortable. Both men snore, one louder than the other. You feel Satoru cuddle up into your back as his hand finds your stomach. He rubs against it as both play tug-a-war with your body to see who gets more to cuddle with. 

The warmth feels good. And the butterflies in your stomach make you feel alive as you’re laid up and fiddling with Satoru’s fingers. 

It's times like this you cherish. The moments where Suguru isn’t in one of his moods and Satoru isn’t off doing god knows what. And neither of them has to leave for days on end. It makes you wish you could stay like this forever and keep them chained to the bed but sadly, you can’t. At least not in the way you want to. Suguru might like it. Satoru? Not so much. Then again, who truly knows? As much sex as you and Satoru have, you haven’t tried that yet. 

Which is surprising in itself and well, you make a mental note to visit a sex shop down the street from your apartment complex one of these days. 

Glancing at the clock again, it's nine-ten and you can't justify laying in bed much longer than you have. You want to see the scenery and all that so you decide it's time to get up and shower. You can even feel the grime of last night's activities start to feel crusty and gross and you can't take it anymore. You run a couple of scenarios through your mind or rather, solutions so you can get up and move freely without waking your boys.

Solution one. Try with all your might to wiggle your way out of their grasp. In which, you do but that plan ends in utter failure when Suguru groans for you not to move again. He turns over to throw his arm over your waist to keep you still. And with Satoru's hand awkwardly sprawled on your ass, they've got you locked in place again. 

Failure.

Solution two. Try to put a pillow in your place but, of course, that was also a failure because they can tell the difference. Hell, they won't even allow you to get up long enough to do the switch.

You're exasperated as you roll over to stare at the ceiling, groaning to no one but yourself. You glance to either side of you. They look adorable with Suguru’s face buried in your chest now and Satoru’s face mushed against the pillows, it makes his lips pucker. You just want to kiss both of them but right now is not the time.

Solution three. Try ripping yourself from their grasp. You try for about five minutes until you realize that's futile.

“Really?” It only serves to annoy you when you hear Satoru chuckle, no doubt listening to you struggle. And if he’s awake then you know Suguru is too even if he doesn’t utter a word. You just want to get up! Your stomach has been growling for a hot minute and you're hungry and gross and ugh!

“Just stay with us, Petal.” How can you say no to that? You don't know but you fix your mouth and tell them to get up when Satoru leans in close. His lips barely touch the skin of your neck and you can feel his gust of breath on your neck that sends a shiver down your spine.

“I was going to make us breakfast though…” You gasp the moment he nibbles against your ear, his warm hand resting against your thigh. So close to where you would like it to be but not right now. You try your best to sit up again but it’s no use. With them holding you the way that they are, you’re shit out of luck. “Well, can I at least take a shower?”

“Mm-mmh,” Suguru mumbles while kissing your shoulder. “Later...”

You roll your eyes at your boyfriend as a sigh falls from your lips. For both of them to be grown men, they’re acting like straight children right now but giving up is the last thing you want to do. Hunger overtakes everything. So you wait, somewhat impatiently for what seems like hours. You knew they were going to fall asleep again soon. 

It was just a matter of time. 

You end up wasting time on your phone, playing some mobile game Satoru told you to download until you hear both men snoring a little louder than before. 

With a shift of their bodies, you're finally able to slip out of their arms to get to the bathroom. You made it your mission to take a quick shower, trying to figure out what you want for breakfast. You don't want to linger in case they wake from their slumber again and try to tug you back into bed. Or you know, in case they decided to hop in the shower with you because breakfast will never be made then.

“Aww,” You coo, seeing them closer with Satoru’s face buried in Suguru’s neck while his leg is hiked onto his front. The blanket covers nothing but their lower half. his arm loosely draped over his tiny waist. Suguru’s waist was a gift from the heavens, you loved it. Especially whenever he’d wrap your legs around it.

You quickly shake those thoughts before they even enter your mind, instead, you snap a picture to tease them later. 

Waltzing over to the drawer, you pull out one of their band shirts, a random one they let you have (since they had so many), and settle for some black panties. Being comfortable was the main thing. 

Stepping out, you close the door quietly and start toward the kitchen. Searching through the fridge to find something to make something simple came to mind, a little bit of both of their favorites.

You're so into what you are cooking, that you don’t hear the door to the suite bedroom open. You also don’t hear either man making their way to the kitchen. 

“Baby?” Satoru whines, wrapping his arms around your waist. You’re startled, mind drawing blanks as you almost drop the hot skillet.

“J-Jesus,” You giggle, turning to face him to push him away, “You scared me.”

“I’m sorry,” Satoru smiles. He peppers kisses down your neck as his hands caress your inner thighs and you can feel the start of his bulge poking into your ass. Suguru stands from the island and pulls you to stand in front of him while Satoru sandwiches you from behind.

“I’m trying to cook,” You whine, feeling Satoru’s hand dip into boy shorts as he rubs his finger over your slit. You throw your head back with a soft moan. Suguru steps away long enough to turn off the stove so the food doesn’t burn, but he steps forward to pick you up and wrap your legs around his waist to sit you on the counter. Neither one says a word, Satoru attacking your neck to hear you groan as Suguru kisses your lips, your body melting into their touches, “I just wanna finish cooking...”

“Maybe we just want you for breakfast,” Satoru growls, nipping at your earlobe before yanking your underwear down and off your body.

“You can finish after we’re done,“ Suguru teases, “You’re already so wet for us, Petal.”

“Fuck yeah, she is,” Satoru smirks, tilting his head so he could get a good look at you. You’re blushing softly, the tint of red turning you into a tomato. “Was it from me touching you or is it the thought of what we’re going to do to you.”

“What’s turning you on, baby?”

“‘Toru…” You don’t want to say it out loud, resulting in you simply nodding your head. Of course, they’re not falling for it. Suguru grips your chin a little harshly but you can’t help but nibble on your bottom lip. Your cunt clenching around absolutely nothing at the blatant show of dominance. Satoru knows that look on your face, you’re slowly falling into that headspace of yours but Satoru doesn’t want you to completely lose yourself. 

At least, not yet.

“Words baby,” Suguru mutters, kissing the corner of your mouth once you take a deep breath to try and ground yourself. 

‘We need to hear you, Peach.”

“Yeah! Yes! Please…” You’re breathless as you throw your arms around Suguru who gets a grip on your thighs to be able to pick up and move you to the kitchen island. You’re going to need more room for the orgasm he’s about to give you. Your hips buck the moment he starts to slowly ease his middle finger inside you. 

“So tight.” Suguru places kisses on your trembling thighs, and all the while, Satoru hops onto the island to settle behind you. He’s glad he sent the chef and maid away for a couple more hours. Let’s be real though, they would have gladly given them a show too. He didn’t care but he knows you do.

“You’re so wet, Peach.”

“She’s sucking my fingers right in.”

Satoru chuckles, bringing his finger to press into your clit before rubbing it while Suguru's fingers continued to pump in and out of your cunt. The sounds cause both men to grow hornier as they watch your orgasm build, you're falling back against Satoru’s chest as he moves to the area above your clit. Suguru takes the opportunity to roll his tongue over your clit before flicking it a couple of times.

“That’s it, love.” Satoru kisses his way down your neck as your mouth falls open and your breathing continues to pick up. You’re right there if the way you try to squeeze your thighs around his hand and Suguru’s head says anything. It’s so hot. Fuck, you’re fucking gorgeous. “Let Sugu take care of you. Feels good doesn’t it?”

You moan in response, reaching for Satoru to bring him closer for a heated kiss. Your eyes close as he wastes no time, his tongue dancing with yours for dominance but ultimately winning.

“Taste sweet.” You throw your head back once more when Satoru starts to play with your bottom lip, gently running his thumb over it. You take it into your mouth, rolling it around your tongue and sucking on it lightly. You can feel how hard he is in your back, wanting to take care of them like they were taking care of you. You let go of his thumb with a soft pop as Suguru leans up to face both of you and quickly runs his palm back and forth over your clit.

“Please- ‘m- Fuck!”

“That’s it,” Satoru teases, running his tongue up your neck and over that spot that makes you shudder. “Don’t be shy, love.”

“Let it out, Petal. Let us hear you.” He whispers, looking at Satoru whose eyes are fixated on you. He wants to taste you until you scream their names. Nibble at your exposed skin until you’re whining for him to stop. He loves the sex-crazed look you get in your eye when you’re about to cum, especially when it’s directed towards him. 

Their faces are so close that Suguru's lips hover not quite touching yours as Satoru is still buried in your neck.

You’re fucking dripping onto the counter, their goal obvious once they catch each other's eyes again and smirk.

“You going to squirt for us, Petal?” Suguru keeps going, hearing you whine but your moans grow louder the moment your body lets go. He leans down, not wanting it to go to waste as his hands slow down but his tongue makes up the work. He continues to lap at your pussy as Satoru watches with sharp lust-filled eyes. 

“Taste good?” Satoru asks as Suguru smirks, giving your pussy a lasting kiss before coming up to meet you and Satoru. It doesn’t take long for Satory to grip his chin to tug him closer. Running his tongue from his chin to his mouth before making out and tasting you all on Sugur’s tongue. Satoru moans into the kiss as Suguru deepens it, all the while, you try to catch your breath before leaning forward to rub Suguru through his boxers.

“Fuck…” Suguru gasps, feeling you lap at his neck while Satoru still has his tongue in his mouth.

This is fucking heaven and god, he doesn’t want to break this.

“Beg for it,” Satoru smirks, pulling away from Suguru but keeping him close enough to feel his breath on his lips. “Beg us to take care of you.” You give Suguru’s cock a gentle squeeze before leaning back against Satoru’s hard chest.

Suguru closes his eyes, swearing he could cum right now. Your gaze is so intense that he knows he’s going to be in for it once you get back to the room.

“Satoru. Petal. Please touch me.” He’s practically begging both of you to do what you want with him. 

“You think that was good enough, Peach?”

You grin, pushing him down to kneel in front of you. 

“I think you can do better than that.”

Satoru hums as both of you stand in front of Suguru with wide grins on your face.

“I know he can too. Guess we’re going to have to fuck it out of him, right Suguru?”

And god, does Suguru's mind grow completely cloudy just thinking about it. 

He can’t fucking wait.

© GOJOLATTE 2024 ➳ ALL RIGHTS RESERVED  PLEASE DO NOT Copy, Translate, Re-Upload, or Steal ANY of my work. Thank You, Beautiful People!

#suguru geto x reader #gojo satoru x reader #suguru geto x gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #gojo saturo #geto suguru #geto x reader #suguru geto #gojo satoru #jjk satoru #satosugu #suguru x reader x satoru #jjk

[cuspofmoon]

pick a pile: what does the universe love about you?

hello! this is my first pick a pile ever on this platform. notes: take what resonates and leave what doesn't. this is a general reading so not everything would resonate 100% with you. hopefully, you can take something out of this pick a pile session.

take a deep breath and ask yourself, "what does the universe love about me?" and choose whichever pile that calls out to you! the explanation is right under the cut.

pile one

cards: the magician reversed, 3 of pentacles, the hierophant reversed

a lot of people have probably said that you are an eccentric individual with an unparalleled and unique way of thinking. you are one of a kind. it amuses everyone, it makes them shake their head in both confusion and fascination because, 'how could you think that way?'. sometimes you blurt out the most unconventional answer to an ordinary question because that's just the way your mind works. you think differently but that's also what makes people flock to you. because you're the only one who gives them a sense of belonging in this community.

pile two

cards: the devil, 6 of pentacles, 8 of pentacles

you are a hustler, through and through. you do your work out of obligation and you grumble every once in a while, but you are a hard worker with a high sense of responsibility. you might be the breadwinner in the family, or you have people you care for back at home who are your number one source of energy. they are what keeps you going and, because of them, you are willing to work your ass off. the exhaustion you feel every time you return from work disappears when you see them smiling at the things you give them, so that's why the universe loves you.

pile three

cards: 2 of cups, queen of pentacles reversed, the emperor reversed

you are a gentle soul, mild-mannered, and tend to be chill at all times, but when someone crosses your boundary, you do not hesitate to humble them down. your way of communicating is straightforward. when you need to communicate your thoughts and feelings, you do not need to sweeten your words or beat around the bush just to appease someone's feelings. regardless of that, people tend to find the way you communicate refreshing. they look to you for a piece of advice. they want you to call them on their bullshit. honestly, we need more people like you in our lives.

pile four

cards: strength reversed, 7 of pentacles, 9 of wands reversed

tenacity might as well be your middle name. you are incredibly strong-willed to the point that people think of you as hardheaded. well, you are hardheaded and you take pride in that. tackling hurdles to hurdles is not a big feat for you because you are brave and you know what you want in life. things that people call obstacles turn out to be challenges for you and you find them interesting to work around. you know your value and you never settle for less. there is nothing that could stop you from getting what you want because you know you deserve it after what you have gone through all this time.

thank you for reading! please leave a like and/or a reblog if you resonate with the messages. you can also leave a tip here so i can keep reading for the community. ❤️

#pick a pile #pick a picture #pick a pile reading #tarot #tarot community #tarot reading #free tarot game #tarot game #tarotdaily #pick a card

[galene-gothic]

𝖶𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝖾𝖺 𝗈𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎?

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ I hope this reading found you in good health, every reblog is appreciated and thank you for everything :) ˖♡ ˎˊ˗ ꒰ 🐇 ꒱

˗ˏˋ༻ʚ♡︎ɞ༺ˎˊ˗             PAID SERVICES

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 1 ꒱

Some sort of an event happened in the past, that's what people are discussing. Whatever happened seems to have caused you a lot of confusion. I honestly feel like people were purposely trying to cause chaos in your life in order to have some drama in their lives. These people seem to either have been/are close to you or just a close witness to the situation. They're saying good things about you, they're talking about how you released your sorrow, resentment or just negative emotions in general. They're saying that you've left your past behind. I just heard 'this boy', I have no clue but the drama might have included some boy. They're saying that your motivation and enthusiasm are returning now. They're saying that you've accepted the situation. They're saying that you're choosing to focus on the positives of life. They're saying that back then you were trying your best to have a positive attitude towards life and make what you could out of it. They might have witnessed you crying or expressing your sorrow, anger or whatever on the verge of tears. They're talking about how you've grown out of it. They're saying that you've grown to respect yourself now and have a lot of courage. The people who put you in such a situation might've been victimizing themselves and might've successfully guilt tripped you to a certain extent but you seem to have recovered from the guilt. They're talking about your endurance and your morals. They are saying that your views have changed or seem to have changed. There's another group of people, likely the ones who made you go through such a traumatizing time. They're saying that you lack self-awareness. They're saying that you only care about yourself. They're saying that you've not accepted what you've done and believe that you've been falsely blamed. I'm getting that it's because while some of it was your fault.

The way they dealt with the situation and treated you was much worse plus they seemed to just need an excuse to criticize you when they weren't even that affected by the situation. People who had nothing to do with the situation might've gotten involved too. Like, supposing you dated your friend's crush, the whole friend group might've turned against you when it didn't even affect them at all. Some of you might've trouble regarding education, some of you might've been forced to drop out or dropped out on will too, for the rest, you're just having difficulties with your studies. People are talking about it. The people who legit pray for your downfall are saying that you have unrealistic dreams and plans. They're saying that you don't have realistic goals and lack the motivation and discipline to work on your career. Someone saying that you're not someone who wants to work solely for money, you're not the type to be like 'as long as I get money, I don't mind giving up on my dreams' or atleast that's what they think and are talking about. Whatever everyone is saying seems to be assumptions mostly. People from the past who know nothing about who you've grown to be. I'm getting some sort of a pause for you. Gap year from work, education or social media. People who literally have nothing to do with you are gossiping about how you lack direction in life. For those of you who aren't dropouts or are not taking gap years, you might give really vague answers when asked about what you wish to do in the future. You might say things like "I haven't thought much about it yet" or "we'll see" or you might be unsure about what field to study next and you might accept it and sometimes vocalise it "I am not sure what to take yet". People wait for you to post so that they can have something to discuss or make fun of. People from the past are slowly beginning to see that your perspective is changing and you're gaining enlightenment.

The tea here isn't about what they're saying, it's more about how fearful they are of your growth and how many people have their eyes on you. People who literally do not know you but know the people or one of the people who tried their best to traumatize you tend to follow you, your friends, your love interests, etc. just because they're obsessed with you. Like, these people went off to college in the same or different places while you could not afford it, their college mates and friends follow you, the guy you were seen hanging out with, etc. I'm getting a very karmic vibe here. I'm not sure what or when but them looking at you and talking shit about you is weighing them down and lifting you up, little by little. Things are rebuilding for you. You're independent and friendly and the new people in your life see that. You know, the first few days at a new school, college or work. If you're pretty, you realise that you're pretty because of the way people act towards you and the things they say. You might suddenly have those moments "maybe, I am even more attractive than I originally assumed". People are obsessed with you and watching you. They're trying to strategize your every move and keeping tabs on you. Someone here legit dreams about getting a revenge on you and some imagine being better than you, being chosen by someone over you. Even if people do not say that they're mad at you due to external validation from people, they make it obvious and they literally form bonds based upon their jealousy masked as hatred towards you. They're mad because of the support you receive from others. Some of these people regret it because they never imagined you actually leaving them and letting go of them completely. While, one of them was definitely praying on your downfall and still is, the rest, they were just trying to poke some fun to excite themselves. The tea is that people have so many different assumptions about you at this time because they have no clue as to what you're doing, who you're with, etc.

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 2 ꒱

Some of you here are from Pile 1, someone here is praising you, they're saying that you're mature and grounded. I think that this is someone close to you because you actually do seem to be this way. They're saying that you're generous and social. They're saying that you're practical and care about material objects. They're saying that you have a good nature and intentions. They're saying that you're nurturing and emotionally intelligent. One hint as to who is praising you, it is someone you've talked to when you didn't do your routine or felt unproductive. You likely told them that you didn't get your work done that particular day and they likely told you that it's okay to have those days as long as you do not make it a habit. Some of you might be balancing between two or more different streams of income and they're saying that you are trying to harvest better time management skills. This person understands you very well, they're saying that you have a personality that is very balanced and traits that often contradict each other. You're the coldest warm person, warmest cold person, nicest mean person, meanest nice person, logical and emotional, etc. all at the same time. They're saying that you've gone through many ups and downs in life but always try to balance things out. They're saying that you try your best to keep your grace under pressure until you finally crack and burst.

They're also saying that you struggle with balancing though. This is definitely someone who knows you well. They saw you finally being able to mentally leave a situation. They're saying that you're releasing past hurts and pain. They're talking about your sense of independence and courage. They're so proud of you and your growth and they feel happy to be able to witness your growth. They're saying that you regained balance and control over yourself and your life again. This person has a lot of love for you. The connection between the both of you is likely platonic. This person really admires you for walking away or distancing yourself from past situations. You still seem to be healing though. They have a lot of faith in you. They're talking about your friendliness and ability to grow. They're saying that you're efficient and most likely will be successful in the future. This person knows that you felt used by people even if they do not speak about it. While, this person talks highly about you, there's someone else who's talking shit about you. They're saying that your relationships are very short lived and that you're superficial. They're saying that you're a bitchy person who has no friends (I'm getting that it's not like you cannot have friends, it's just that you don't have a lot of them or people extremely close to you right now.)

If you do, they're not aware of that, I'm getting that this person is likely making other people hate you along with them. If you guys had a break up, people are talking about that. There's a lot of gossip going around currently. This pile definitely seems to have had a falling out with friends or something. I just heard "if she's sad, she tries to drag your mood down too". You guys might have started your healing journey around children or are healing your inner child. Some of you have different projects that are helping you heal better. There's also a chance that some romance changed your perspective, people are not talking about it but it's kind of a confirmation for some of you. People are saying that you lack a vision for the future. They're saying that you do not have enough drive to go after your dreams and stay consistent. People are also talking about your failed long distance relationship. For some of you, it might've been just a situationship but they're not fully aware of that. A group of people are talking about how you've lost direction. They're saying that you'll get nowhere in the future, I just heard it's 'neighbourhood karens'. Someone is saying that you're going through an unrequited love. People are saying that you have blocked emotions and legit tell people not to talk to you so that you feel alone. They're saying that you hurt their feelings, made them sad and are exaggerating everything you've done to them even though they've done worse to you.

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 3 ꒱

People are saying that you're a social climber. If you go to school or college, juniors are talking about how mean you are. People might even be slutshaming you behind your back. The funny part is that so many of you here are probably virgins. They're saying that you lack/lacked financial stability and stayed friends with people just for their money. People are saying that you're out of control. They're saying that you're obsessed with status and use people. People are also saying that you act like you don't need anyone. The person or people who are talking trash about you are people who are still crying over spilt milk, likely people from the past. Someone is talking about how you have large sums of money and are likely stealing money from others. If you went to a sleepover recently, the person might've lost some money and talked shit about you behind your back. These people tried their best to guilt trip you in the past and it did work for a while but it stopped working after a while. They're still blaming you for everything. I'm getting that people tend to feel lower than you and then act like you're the problem. You might have betrayed them or they might have betrayed or both. This is someone you trusted who let you down. You might have done something that hurt one person in the group and the whole group turned against you is the scenario I'm getting. You might have almost completely hid yourself away from the world. These people are not open to change, they take everything as a personal attack and are still the people that they were a few years ago. You, on the other hand are the type to grow every single day. I'm getting that for some of you, you used to talk shit about others with this person or group of people but as you started growing older, you started feeling like it didn't align with your personal values and you might have called them out.

Maybe, you just refused to talk shit about others but they were like "oh, you think you're better than us/me?" Let's just say that they failed to understand you but they fear you strongly. They know that you have a lot of hidden secrets, there are so many things that they're trying to figure out about your life. You've withdrawn and are silent but you are often not like this and they feel like you're going to come up with something in full force. You naturally attract attention even if unwanted and right now you do not want attention, you want peace but when you come out of this period of solitude, they don't know what's going to greet them. They were in your life for pretty long until you had a falling out, they were always confused when you entered those periods of solitude and jumped into conclusions but everytime they did that, you did something surprising so they're naturally confused when it comes to you and your life currently. Everytime they ignored your potential, you proved them wrong. They spread misinformation on you but well you have something you have been working on that they can pick up on intuitively and they're so curious and feel like when you do step out of the self isolation or whatever, you're going to be so big, they will not know what to do. However, some of them are trying to reassure themselves and the rest that you lack potential for any of that. They think that you might've hidden agendas against them. These people cannot let go of you, mostly because if one of them doesn't bring you up, the other does. You're rising above the problems and their bitchiness. You've realised how worthy you really are and you think that you've gotten over the worst already and they can pick up on it too. You do not give them the time of the day. Your life improved in some way after they left your life and they know that.

It could be anything, something as small as your first job or something as big as a successful business, however, either way you're ahead of them in some way, regardless of whether they accept it or not. You've let go and learnt from the past to a certain extent and you're trying to fully release, they feel like their fears will come true. Their biggest fear is you realising your worth and achieving success. The amount of resilience you have is something that they cannot deny. Some of you are taking a break from school, college or work, maybe it's been one or two years now, you're still growing something for yourself though. They know that you have an ability that they lack, self awareness and acceptance, you're very much the 'yes, what I did was wrong but I forgive myself' kind of person while they're the 'yes, everything is my fault' while denying everything and refusing to look into themselves and their actions. I just heard that you're on your way to become a ten. You know and manage to take time out when you burn out, they aren't like that. They're too scared of being behind in life even though something like that doesn't really exist. They're burnt out and not content. Their life is tiresome because of some routine, I just heard 'rat race'. You're taking a lot onto yourself and someone else is talking about how hard you are on yourself and appreciating your efforts. Some are talking about how beautiful, nurturing and respectful you are. You're growing, please continue doing so.

#intuitive readings #pick a card #pick a deck #pac #pac reading #divination #pick a pile

[ellethespaceunicorn]

Don’t Take My Sunshine Away, Part I

Title: Don’t Take My Sunshine Away, Part I

Rating: Explicit, 18+, Minors - DNI

Pairing: Lloyd Hansen x Reader (Sunshine)

Fandom: The Gray Man

Word Count: 2.5K

Series Summary: You lived your life on a schedule. Everything is planned out from sunrise to sunset. But what happens when you go out on a limb and out of your comfort zone? Will it have dire consequences?

Chapter Summary: You’d agreed to meet someone from the internet and you find yourself tied up in a basement. 

Warnings: dark fic!, attempted mugging, drugging, abduction, suspension bondage, Murder Daddy™️, oral sex (m receiving), dub-con, non-con, unprotected p-in-v sex, knife play, biting, blood play

A/N: I had an idea about Lloyd Hansen. Here is that idea. I haven’t written for Chris Evans’ character since Steve Rogers pre-Infinity War so this was an exercise and a half! Also, many many many thanks to @peyton-warren and @raccoon-eyed-rebel for helping me entertain Lloyd and for helping me to not lose my mind whilst writing this. Unbeta’d, we die like people who tried their best. 

Dividers by: @firefly-graphics 

Support/Reblog banner by me

Cover Art: by me

Spotify Playlist is here. 

Series Masterlist

My Masterlist

It’s just your luck, honestly.

You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. The place was a dark street. The time was 9:03 pm.

Well, technically you could blame your Tinder date for this. He didn’t fucking show up and he didn’t respond to your texts or calls. Like he just disappeared off the face of the Earth. You ended up waiting for an hour and decided to just pay for your third cup of coffee and leave.

Luckily for you, the buses were still running and there was a stop just across the street from the diner. You climb off your stool at the counter and exit through a particularly noisy door. It alerts some guys down the street and they turn to look at you before turning back to each other. Your sigh of relief is reversed when you get across the street and hear one of them shouting at you before moving closer.

You check the bus schedule that hangs in the bus shelter. You only have to wait for five minutes for safety. 

What could go wrong?

“Hey baby, can I have your number?” The overwhelmingly strong skunky smell of bad weed hits your nasal passage and you gag. “Oh, what? I’m disgusting to you? Stuck up, bitch!”

“Look, I’m just trying to get home. I don’t want any trouble.” Your hand went to your pocket where you had your safety keychain on your keyring.

“Too fucking bad because you just landed yourself in trouble, cunt,” Three long strides and he has you in his grip, pulling you behind the bus shelter into the empty alleyway. He pushes you onto the wet pavement and is on top of you in seconds. He watches as you open your mouth to scream and he clamps a hand around your throat, cutting you off. “Who do you think is coming for you, unlucky bi–”

“What the fuck…hey!” A voice is coming from the street and getting closer.

Your attacker is being pulled off of you and it’s so dark in the alley that you can’t fully see who grabbed him. You see a dark blur and you hear sounds of a struggle before a strong pair of hands is helping you up. 

“Are you ok, Miss?” You’re being ushered down the alley to the only lit streetlight. The more you walk under its glow, you notice the man who saved you. Your eyes are drawn to the push broom on his lip first, then to his slicked-back hair, and finally to his dramatically-patterned polo and pastel chino pants.

“Yeah, I’m fine…I think. Thanks.” You reach out your hand to touch his where it lingers on your arm. He doesn’t attempt to remove his hand, even after you squeeze it with yours quickly.

“No problem, why don’t I take you home? My car’s just around the corner here.” He does attempt to pull you towards the street. You know better than to let anyone take you to a second location, so you put your hand up with a smile.

“That’s quite alright. I’ll just wait for the bus if you don’t mind.” You try and remove your arm from his hand but his grip on you gets tighter.

“Let me at least walk you back to the bus stop?”

“I’ll be fine, I promise.” You try to turn away and he pulls you closer to him.

“Why did you have to make this difficult, Sunshine?” His angry growl is quiet but no less intimidating.

“I’m sorry, wha–” You don’t get to finish as you feel a sharp prick in your bicep. Looking down, you see a syringe sticking out of your skin. You go to pull out the needle but darkness fades into your eyesight and you slip off into the void.

You awake to a pounding in your head. Your arms are sore. Your legs are numb. And you can feel the stiff presence of duct tape over your mouth. Opening your eyes, you try to raise your hand to shield your eyes from the sudden brightness but you realize your arms and legs have been immobilized.

Looking around, you see that you’re suspended about three feet above the ground in some pretty elaborate rope bindings. Your wrists are crossed against your bare chest. Your left leg is being held up straight, while your right leg is only supported by two lengths of rope on your thigh, leaving your foot to dangle which means your pussy is on full display. 

You hear a door open and two sets of footsteps walk down the stairs. As the steps get closer, you hear two voices as well. 

“...didn’t have to punch me so fucking hard!”

“Yeah? Well maybe if you didn’t have your slimy hands all over my things, I wouldn’t have had to bruise your fucking spleen. Don’t be such a pussy, Dougherty!”

 “Fuck you, Hansen.”

“Don’t be sad I have a new plaything and you don’t.”

“Yeah. Just don’t wreck this one like that last girl.”

You struggle in the ropes and try and grunt loudly through the duct tape and the metal anchor that holds the rope loudly jostles. You pick your head up and look to your right as the men come into view.

As you recognize the man who had you on the ground, you couldn’t believe your eyes when you saw the geometric-patterned polo-wearing man who tried to “save” you. 

“I’m so glad you’re awake. I know you must have a lot of questions. But, you’re gonna listen first,” He walks until he can grab onto the ropes that hold you up. Looking down at you, he smiles sweetly. He begins to swing you toward him, letting go and watching as you swing back and forth, “Now, my name is Lloyd Hansen, but you are to call me Sir. You now belong to me. From every thought you have to every step you take. I own all of it. You may be wondering why I chose you of all people. Well, it had to be you, Sunshine. You’re the one.”

You are at his mercy as his hands grope at your tits and he pinches your nipples. You turn your head to look away but he just grabs you by the chin and makes you look at him.

“Now, Sunshine, you take what Sir gives you and you are appreciative. Trust me, this will all make sense later. But for now, I think it’s time I claim what’s mine.” He stalks over to your legs, standing between them. He places a kiss on your left ankle as he grabs at your right thigh. Pulling your core flush with his clothed hardness, you can feel exactly how excited he is to own you.

“I’d hate to interrupt, but–”

“But yet, you are interrupting. What?” Lloyd says as he trails kisses down your calf, his mustache tickling you as he moves.

“Well, I just…you said you would pay me. And I don’t really wanna stay around for whatever this is, honestly.” 

Lloyd finally turns his head to the other man in the room before patting your leg, “I’ll be right back, Sunshine. Don’t you go anywhere, ok?”

Fucking asshole.

Pulling out a wad of cash from his pocket, Lloyd starts counting bills, “So what do you say to…a hundred bucks?”

“I say fuck you if you think I’m taking less than half a yard. Shit, I didn’t even get to fu–”

The pop of a gunshot cuts through not only his sentence but also his left eye. You watch as Lloyd pockets the money and turns back to you with a smile.

“Fuck, ok. I didn’t plan on shooting him in front of you. But…well, I did,” He caresses your cheek before ripping off the tape from your mouth. He tilts his head and raises his eyebrows, expectantly waiting for you to speak.

“What do you want from me?” Your wrists hurt from struggling against the ropes.

“Oh, Sunshine. I want everything from you…eventually. But for now, I want to use your mouth.” He unbuttons and unzips his pants, “Those fucking lips of yours look so delectable.” He traces your bottom lip with his thumb and you debate biting it. Then, you remember the dead guy in the room.

Just comply. He won’t have to hurt you if you comply.

You clear your throat to get Lloyd to look at you. “Um…S-Sir?”

“Look at you calling me Sir already like a good girl,” He beams, looking down at you and holding your face in his murderous hand, “What do you want to ask me?”

“Are you going to kill me, Sir?” You couldn’t stop the fat tears from falling as you blink up at his face. You watched as his smile fell and he crouches to bring his face to your eye level.

“I would love to tell you that I won’t kill you, Sunshine. But it really all depends on you. If you don’t give me a reason to kill you, I won’t kill you. It’s as simple as that, Sunshine.”

You feel your eyes glaze over as you thought about what Lloyd had said. You didn’t want to give him a reason to kill you. You also know that there was no one coming to save you. You had no family, no friends, no roommates. You had lived a solitary life. 

The sound of Lloyd clearing his throat brought you back to reality.

“Use my mouth, Sir.” 

No sooner does the half-sultry half-terrified sentence leave your mouth, than Lloyd is reaching into his chinos to pull out his fat dick as he walks around you. You tilt your head back and are met with his impressive package. Eight inches of veiny length in your face suddenly is a lot to handle. As he strokes himself, he makes sure to keep it just out of reach. You hate yourself for licking your lips and following his hand with your eyes.

He positions his dick slightly over your mouth and squeezes his length from base to tip so that a dribble of pre-cum hits your lips. You snake your tongue out to taste him, the salty bitter taste you expect turns out to be almost sweet. Why couldn’t he just taste terrible?

“Open up, Sunshine.” He steps closer to you as you part your lips. He doesn’t stop pushing in until you feel his balls touch your nose. You close your lips around him and breathe through your nostrils. 

Inhaling deeply, you’re hit with the familiar scent of sweetness mixed with musk—sort of Earthy. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say it was African black soap. You knew the smell very well, you used the body wash every day.

“Fuuuuck, baby. Gonna fuck this throat.” He wraps his large hands around your throat as he pulls out slowly, leaving just the tip before he slams back in making you gag. 

He starts a steady rhythm and soon his balls are slapping you in the face. You can deny it all you want, but the way he fits perfectly in your mouth is obvious. The way your hands clench into fists and unclench denotes the urge to grab him and pull him deeper. 

One of his hands moves from your throat to your tits. Pinching your nipples and groping the soft flesh must not be enough because soon he is slapping at your breasts, getting you to grunt around his dick. The groan that leaves him is so sinful, you wish you could squeeze your thighs together.

But you don’t have time to worry about that because Lloyd is pulling out of your mouth. A string of saliva connects you until he steps back. You try to follow him with your mouth but he’s out of reach too soon.

“Sir?” You don’t like the air of desperation in your voice when you speak. You watch as he moves to the other end of your body and you soon feel his hand roam from your thigh to your pussy.

In one swift motion, Lloyd is inside your cunt. With the grip his hands have on your hips, you know it’s going to hurt tomorrow. But, that’s a later problem because Sir is fucking you like he hates you. You should hate this, but you don’t. At least not yet.

“Fuck, Sunshine…knew your pussy was gonna feel good but DAMN!” 

You can’t help the slew of sounds that escapes your mouth as he fucks you. The last of which sort of sounded like “Hnnnngg”. You feel as if you are going to explode at any minute but a spike of fear hits you as you think about where Lloyd is going to finish. You’re not on birth control. The speed of his thrusts picks up and you can feel him swell inside you. Fuck it.

“Sir, cum with me!”

“Fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuuuuuuck…” Lloyd latches onto your stretched left leg with his teeth, leaving behind deep and angry bite marks as he empties inside you. Pulling out, he watches his spend leak from you, righting his pants.

You are in a state of bliss so deep that you barely register as Lloyd bites into your right thigh enough to break the skin in a few places. But you can feel the sting of his butterfly knife as it moves over your skin.  The letters “LH” well with blood on your leg as silent fat tears roll down your face.  

“Now you can wear my bite mark like the badge of honor that it is. And when that fades, you’ll still have my initials so you can be returned to me if you are ever lost. I don’t plan on losing you, so you better not plan on getting lost, Sunshine.”

“I don’t want to get lost, Sir. I like it here with you.” The tremble in your voice doesn’t hide your fear, and part of you doesn’t want it to. You want him to know he doesn’t have to worry about losing you somehow.

“Think you can behave for a bath and a meal? I’ll have to supervise the bath, of course. And we’d be eating together. Unless you like being hungry, in your own filth with my cum dripping out of you all night. What do you say?” Lloyd offers, the fingers of one hand ghosting over his initials on your thigh.

“Would I still have to be tied up, Sir?” So many questions you could have asked, but you picked this one. 

Maybe if your hands were free, you could…do what? Fight him? Pick a lock? 

No, just comply. You can do this. 

“You won’t be tied up, but I do have a gift for you upstairs. But you can only have it if you’re a good girl. Are you gonna be a good girl, Sunshine?” While he spoke, he dragged a fingernail from your thigh to your upper torso as he walked around your body to your head.

“I’ll be a good girl for you, Sir. I promise.” The words on your tongue felt both foreign and familiar. Almost like you weren’t afraid for him to hurt you. 

You were afraid that he wouldn’t. And that scared you more than anything. 

Part II

A/N: There will be more of this. I’ve never written for Lloyd before but I enjoyed him as the little devil on my shoulder.

@raccoon-eyed-rebel @peyton-warren

If you would like to be tagged in the next installment, lemme know 🫣

#chris evans #chris evans characters #lloyd hansen #dark lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen smut #lloyd hansen x reader #lloyd hansen x you #chris evans fic #chris evans fanfiction #dark! fic #dark fic #dark!fic #ellethespaceunicorn fanfic

[corrodedbisexual]

The ultimate shadow ban survivor guide

I've seen multiple people I follow, or their mutuals affected by shadow bans lately (makes me wonder if it's @staff's attempts to fight bots going totally haywire). As someone who survived a 2-month-long shadow ban on my main this winter, I thought I'd make a post.

First step of being shadow banned: calm down and take a breath. A shadow ban is just a stupid glitch in tumblr's anti-spam system. You're not losing your blog. You're gonna need a whole lot of patience, and deal with inconveniences, but it's fixable.

Read the incredibly useful post All About Shadowban by @that-damn-girl. It outlines the symptoms quite well. The only thing I'd point out is "your original posts won’t be visible to your followers either" - afaik that doesn't happen. Everything you post and reblog will still be visible to your followers, and also they can interact with your posts - like them, reblog them, reply to them.

Just like the post says, contact support. I recommend using a different email than what your banned blog is registered to; not because your ticket won't go through (mine actually did, as I found out when they finally replied), but because you might not receive an email confirmation for your ticket (it's somehow tied to the anti-spam thing, I think), and you're going to worry and try to send more tickets, like I did.

Now wait. And wait, and wait, and wait. They are SLOW. I've seen some miraculous 1-day unbans in the #shadow ban tag, but most people, like me, wait around a month for support to reply. Those are the same guys going through thousands of bot reports every day in addition to user tickets.

If you're going to wait, might as well keep blogging. Now if this is your sideblog that's shadow banned, consider yourself lucky. Make a new temporary sideblog, use it to post your original stuff so it goes into tags (mind that it might take a few days for a new blog to start showing up in tags). Reblog everything to your shadow banned blog so you still have all content in one place and your followers see it. If it's your main that's banned, you can still do that, but there's the extra pain of not being able to reply to posts or send non-anon Asks, since that is only done from main. Might need to register a separate account for that.

Some more fun facts under readmore.

Fun fact #1

Trying to send support follow-up emails in the request confirmation email isn't going to do anything to speed up the process. But I did tweet at them using this tumblr support summoning picture by @cornmayor and offered a raccoon blood sacrifice to resolve my issue when it was like a month with no response. This is what they replied.

3 hours later I got an email that my shadowban was lifted. I honestly don't know if it was a coincidence, but I mean, this is tumblr staff. Maybe they do accept blood sacrifices.

Fun fact #2

If you're wondering why my shadow ban lasted 2 months if I got a support reply after 1 month, well. It's hard to say exactly how their ban/unban system works bc support replies exclusively with pre-written template sentences, but basically they fucked up. The first time they told me my blog has been restored, I gained pretty much all functions back, except that my posts were still not appearing in tags. Which means probably that being hidden from tags is some kind of different flag on your blog that they forgot to remove. So I had to send a follow-up ticket and wait another month.

My advice is, when they tell you it's fixed, don't take that at face value, go and check all the functions you'd lost (replies, messaging, asks, tagging, appearing in notes, getting mentioned by others).

#tumblr #shadow ban #shadowban #tumblr support #reference

[mysterious-moonstruck-musings]

Destiny & Deliverance: Chapter 23

Destiny & Deliverance Masterlist ||| Dieter Bravo X OFC New as of 10/06/2023

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Series Rating: Explicit (18+)

Series Summary: Natalia Cohen is experiencing major life changes, beginning with leaving an emotionally abusive husband. She is learning how to navigate life on her own while dealing with high functioning anxiety, depression, and mild PTSD. Everything is looking up for her. She is a highly respected consultant for a major LA firm, has her best friend, Lauren, by her side, and is on her path to healing. Everything changes when she meets a handsome and broken stranger on a work trip. He turns out to be a well-known actor, with a heart-breaking past. They quickly develop a connection that will forever alter their lives. 

Warnings: Themes dealing with mental health, emotional trauma, alcohol use, and discussions about suicide. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn type of story. Read at your own risk.

Chapter Quote: You meeting someone?

It had been three months since I left Dieter behind. All things considered, I felt like I had handled it well. Most days I managed to get through my routine without thinking of him, throwing myself into work and small craft projects. The paparazzi appeared to have gotten bored with following me around since there was no story to report on. I wouldn’t interact with them and there had been no sightings of Dieter and I together. The assumption was that we had split, and any drama related to said split had passed. Not having the paps shouting questions and sticking a camera in my face on my daily commute to the office made a huge difference in keeping him off my mind.

Staying away from social media and tabloid sites had also been crucial in being able to get back to some kind of normalcy. It had become vital to keep this distance, because Dieter was all over the news feeds due to his reinvigorated party boy ways. He didn’t seem like the same person anymore and it was too painful to see it over and over. As far as I knew he hadn’t been home during any of his filming breaks, and with the production of his movie wrapping up soon, I was anxious to know if he would finally come back to LA. Part of that anxiety was rooted in my concern about running into him. No matter how many times I had tried to imagine it, I wasn’t sure how I would handle suddenly being face-to-face with him again.   

I would be lying if I said that I was over him. There was no doubt in my mind that I will always love him. How could I not? He had changed me for the better and helped me through a rough time in my life. During the time that we had been together, and he had been doing well, life had been so much more fulfilling. He showed me what it was like to be loved and appreciated. What it meant to be truly happy. Perhaps even more than that, he had given me the confidence to be myself. I could honestly say that I didn’t know any of that until him. I was able to acknowledge that he did all that for me, but at the same time I had also become mostly numb about it all. Maybe it was the anger, maybe it was denial, or maybe I had figured out how to move on without him. Either way, I felt like I was going to be ok, and I had accepted that he wasn’t going to be a part of my life anymore. 

It was late on a Wednesday evening when I got news that he was back. Lauren texted me to let me know he had been spotted at one of the fancy restaurants that all the celebrities tended to hang out at. Unsurprisingly, he had been there with Anna and a handful of other people. I had asked Lauren not to tell me anything she read about him, but I still found myself grateful to get the warning. At least now I was aware that there was a possibility of running into him, so it wouldn’t catch me completely off guard. What I didn’t realize is how soon that would happen.        

The following morning, I was surprised to receive a call from Ethan Carrington. He called to let me know that he was in town and wanted to have dinner to catch up. I thought it was a little odd, but he was one of our top tier clients, so I agreed to meet him that evening. I wasn’t surprised when he proposed meeting at one of the most upscale restaurants in town. We made plans to meet there by 7 PM and he let me know a table had already been reserved under his name.   

To say I was flustered by the time I left the house was an understatement. All my afternoon meetings had run over, causing me to finish up work much later than I had planned. I had to rush to find something to wear, then shower, and get ready. To save some time, rather than trying to tame my hair, I blow dried it and pulled it back into a sleek low bun, then threw on a light layer of makeup. I got dressed in a navy sleeveless scoop neck A-line chiffon dress that had an asymmetrical bottom and was embellished with a sash around the waist. I dug out my matching navy peep toe high heels with ankle straps to wear, then quickly grabbed my purse and walked barefooted to the car. 

With traffic slowing me down as usual, I made it to the restaurant with only minutes to spare. Luckily it had valet parking, so I didn’t have to worry about finding a spot. I did feel slightly embarrassed about making the valet wait while I put my shoes on. He assured me that this wasn’t even close to the strangest thing he dealt with, and we had a good laugh about it as he waited patiently for me to exit the vehicle.   

As I was walking up the few steps to the entrance, carefully watching my feet to avoid tripping in my hurried pace, I was stopped in my tracks by a set of feet that had come to a standstill directly in front of me. When I looked up, my breath caught in my throat. Dieter and Anna stood in front of me, staring back at me and saying nothing. Dieter looked tired, the telltale sign of dark circles under his eyes revealing his sleep problems were probably still very present. His hair was longer than it had been the last time I saw him, and it was styled into soft, messy curls.  He was dressed in charcoal dress pants with a black button up dress shirt. As usual, the top button was open, and the sleeves were rolled up. He also had his glasses on. A little voice in the back of my mind begrudgingly pointed out that he looked just as sexy as always. Still, something was off about him; it was clear in his fidgety body language, and particularly the turbulent look in his eyes.

My eyes widened as I took him in, my body almost reeling just as strongly as my mind did. “Dieter…umm hi,” I stuttered out. I was startled by his sudden appearance and did not know what to say or how to act. His stare shifted into an unsettling smirk, his dilated pupils making his eyes look darker than usual, and by the way he tipped his head back slightly I could tell that he shifted into performance mode, emitting a boisterous energy that became even clearer when he spoke. 

“I’m surprised to see you at a place like this. You meeting someone?”

His tone sounded heavy, maybe even a little hostile. Ah, so that’s how this was going to go. 

“Yes, I am.” I inhaled deeply and straightened my shoulders, unwilling to play whatever game he was trying to set up here. 

“A guy?” He stared directly into my eyes as he spoke, unblinking, and it struck me how empty the expression on his face was. It was almost like he wasn’t in there and someone else was pulling his strings.

“Not that it’s really any of your business, but yes. It’s a guy.” I didn’t break eye contact, hoping that I was able to keep a neutral expression on my face. All of it felt like a test, but I wasn’t quite sure if I wanted to show him that I could easily pass it. Maybe the best response was no response at all. 

He pursed his lips and arched his eyebrows before he shook his head, his eyes shifting downcast momentarily before he looked back up at me. Straightening up as he gathered his composure.

“Well, I hope you get to know this one a little better before jumping into bed with him. Assuming he goes for this whole… polished stepford wife look or whatever this is,” he said, his voice having just the slightest slur to it.

I could feel my jaw tighten, my eyes blazing with anger that his words suddenly re-kindled in me. I gave him a tight smile in return. 

“Hmm,” I said, shaking my head slightly from side to side as I rubbed the fingers of my right hand across my bottom lip in disgust. He continued to stare at me expectantly, clearly wanting a response, and I had to look away for a moment before I met his intense gaze again. “I see what you’re doing, you know. Don’t worry, it’s still working.” I paused briefly, “So, fuck you.” 

“Ooh, you already did that, sweetheart. A whole fuckin’ lot.” He gave me a cunning smile, teeth bared for a moment as there was nothing friendly or sweet about it. 

I could feel my face tensing further at his combative remarks. I knitted my brows together and shook my head from side to side again. He was clearly trying to piss me off, and it was working. He knew exactly what to say to push my buttons. I wasn’t even going to attempt to understand why he was being like this, it simply hurt too much. I didn’t want to engage in an argument. I just wanted to protect myself from more pain.  

Anna chuckled as she leaned in to break the intense stare that I was giving Dieter, “Damn, you’re a feisty one, aren’t you.” 

I gave her a tight smile wrapped up in thinly veiled contempt. “I suggest that you don’t fucking speak to me,” I said very quietly, for a moment actually entertaining the thought of punching her in her smug little face.

She backed away slightly and grabbed onto Dieter’s arm, moving so that he was positioned between us. Clearly, my intimidation attempt struck its mark with her. 

My attention was drawn away from them when I heard someone call my name. When I turned, I saw Carrington walking towards me from the entrance of the restaurant. Trying to shift gears, I tried to relax my face and gave him a polite smile as he approached. He looked like he had just stepped off the set of a James Bond film in the expensive tailored suit he was wearing, oozing confidence, and looking just as handsome as I remembered. 

“There you are, I was beginning to think you stood me up,” he said with a joking tone as he leaned in to give me a small kiss on the cheek. “You look nice,” he added as he pulled away with a wide smile on his face, his eyes warm as he gave me a quick once-over. 

“Ethan, thank you! Sorry, I was just catching up with some friends,” I said dryly, glancing back toward Dieter, who was now radiating disdain. His jaw twitched as glared at Carrington, his eyes narrowing and somehow turning even darker as he glanced at Carrington’s hand that now rested on the small of my back. Correcting himself, his eyes quickly moved back up to meet my gaze.

I didn’t flinch as we locked eyes and spoke up, “I guess I’ll see you around. Have a good evening.” 

I gave them both a sarcastic smile. Carrington’s hand stayed on my lower back as he guided me toward the entrance. I may not have wanted to engage in the game that Dieter seemed to play, but part of me enjoyed that it clearly bothered him to see me with another man. A handsome one at that. Even if it was a work meeting, which he didn’t know. 

As we were being led to our table, I had to take a few deep breaths to calm myself. I wasn’t even upset about seeing Dieter, only livid about his attitude and the way he had spoken to me. The waiter seated Carrington and I next to a window toward the front of the restaurant, handing us the menus which we looked at in a comfortable silence. From the corner of my eye, I could see Dieter and Anna were still outside, waiting for their car. She was on her phone, but he had spotted me through the window and just stood there, staring with his hands pushed into his pockets. I tried not to look directly toward him, but that didn’t stop me from peeking over my menu every so often to see if he was still there. Despite all the bravado that had been there earlier, and the confidence with which he had carried himself, he looked like a broken man now. It tugged at my heartstrings as I wished I knew what was going through his mind. I could tell the cocky front he was putting up had diminished to something that resembled hurt or maybe even regret. All the showmanship had left his stance as he seemed to be unaware of what happened around him, Anna even needing to pull him aside when someone tried to walk past them. Luckily, the valet pulled up with their car right after that, so I didn’t have to endure that sight for very long. 

Carrington’s voice tugged me back into the present and out of my thoughts when he spoke up, “I would ask how you’ve been, but I think I may have a general idea of the answer.” 

He gave me a sympathetic look before continuing, “That was him, wasn’t it?” 

I smiled nervously as I glanced down at the table, wondering how much he knew. Probably everything there was to know publicly, be it true or false, “Yes, that was him.” I nodded as I looked back up at him, finding his eyes were as gentle as his voice had been when asking me the question. “I’m sorry my drama made me late and that everyone across the US knows about it, apparently.”   

“Yeah, it was all over the news.” He seemed apologetic about it. “Hard to miss. I wasn’t sure if you needed rescuing or not, so I’m sorry if I interrupted something…”

“Not that I need rescuing…but thank you for that.”  

He laughed, “Yeah, I doubt you do. You're pretty fierce on your own.”  

His eyes stayed focused on my face, briefly dropping down to my lips when I smiled at his comment. I wasn’t sure how to take that, but I felt like he was possibly flirting. We were interrupted by the server coming over to take our order. 

We proceeded with small talk while we waited for our food. He gave me an update on how the company was doing and mentioned the possibility of expanding soon, staying vague on the details. As we chatted, I noticed how attentive he was. Always looking me directly in the eye as I spoke, gesturing subtly to the waiter when he noticed I was low on water. We hadn’t really had a chance to interact outside of a business setting, so it was interesting to see him in a more personal manner and have an easy conversation. I was getting small glimpses of his personality that I hadn’t picked up on before. He was very witty and had a good sense of humor.

Once we started to dig into the main course, he got down to business. 

“Well, I think we’ve run the gambit on small talk. I guess I should get to the reason I wanted to meet with you and stop beating around the bush.” He gave me a nervous smile. I gave him one in return, unsure of where this was going. 

“I talked to Aubrey about this, and she indicated that you may be open to a change, given recent events and she’s supportive of it.” He gave me a small grimace, realizing that may not have been the best opener. 

I smiled and motioned for him to continue. 

“Our Chief Operating Officer will be retiring soon, and we’ll need a replacement. You’re the first person that came to mind for the position. I know, it’s a big change, so I don’t expect an answer now. I do, however, want to let you know that it’ll be a significant raise and we’ll cover the cost of any moving expenses and travel.”   

Whatever I had been expecting from the meeting, this wasn’t it. He had my attention. “How significant?”

“Seven figures, significant.” He gave me a smirk as my eyes widened. 

“COO…I mean, am I even qualified for that?” I laughed in disbelief. 

“Well, you’re already basically telling me how to run my company and saved me a lot of money in the process. I’ve seen you in action. You have a brilliant mind, and your problem-solving skills are unlike anything I’ve ever seen. You’re also really good at handling difficult situations. Why wouldn’t I want that?” 

He wasn’t wrong, he was indeed running his company based on my suggestions. I shook my head in agreement. 

“It would require moving to New York though?” I asked, trying to process the information and what this all would mean for my future. 

“Yes…and no. I would absolutely love for you to join us in New York. In fact, it’s my preference. However, like I said, we’re planning to expand. We’ll be opening another branch in Silicon Valley. I’ll need a COO there as well. Just know that if you choose that location, you’ll be building from the ground up. You’ll be fully involved with all planning. It’ll require you to spend some time in New York while we work out the details, but once everything is set, you would only need to travel occasionally. It also comes with slightly higher pay due to the extra work that’ll be involved.”  

This time I sat with my mouth hanging open in shock, “I don’t even know what to say.”

“I don’t expect an answer right away. We have some time before I need to know.” 

“I mean, it’s not a no. Umm, but I do have a lot to think through.” I reached for my water, taking a deep drink now that my mouth suddenly felt very dry. 

“Of course, I wouldn’t expect anything else,” He took a bite of his food as he studied me, obviously trying to figure out where I stood on the offer. 

He continued to tell me about the many benefits the company offered. He was trying his best to sell it to me. The offer was appealing and something I really needed to consider. We eventually moved on to other non-business related topics. It was nice getting to know him on a more personal level. Time seemed to fly by as we continued to chat, even after our meal was finished. 

We finally decided to call it a night after he insisted on covering the bill. We walked out to collect our vehicles. While we waited, he leaned in to give me a polite goodbye kiss on the cheek, lingering slightly longer than what is socially acceptable. I got a whiff of his musky scent. I couldn’t deny, he smelled amazing. I cleared my throat as he pulled away, trying to correct my train of thought. 

He smiled sheepishly, “Sorry, I lingered. I made it awkward. Forget that happened.” 

We both laughed. I caught myself biting my bottom lip, which seemed to briefly bring his attention back to my mouth again. Fuck. Was I flirting now? Thankfully, we were interrupted by the valet returning with his vehicle. Mine followed behind a few seconds later. 

“We’ll talk soon. Have a good evening,” he finally said as he took his keys and walked toward the driver's side door, giving a charming smile as he went. I agreed and gave him a wave as I collected my keys and moved toward my own car. 

My head was reeling during the entire drive home. I wasn’t sure what just happened, and I had conflicting feelings about the whole thing. Did we have vibes? Were we flirting? Also, what the hell was wrong with me for allowing that to happen? There was no way I could work for him under those circumstances. Not to mention what had happened with Dieter and Anna. I needed to talk through this with Lauren. 

When I got home, I quickly changed into my pajamas, then facetimed Lauren. She didn’t answer. I gave it a few minutes then tried again. She answered on the second round, a surprised look clearly visible on her face despite the dim lighting around her. 

“Talia? Something wrong? Why are you calling me back-to-back?”

“For starters, you signed up for excessive calls when you decided to be my friend,” I reminded her. “Also, don’t get me started on your texting habits.”

“Okay, what the hell has gotten into you?” She laughed as she shook her head, leaning behind her to switch a lamp on, which illuminated the view on my screen considerably. 

“You’re not going to believe how my night has gone. I’m turning the tables; I’m the one that needs life advice.”  

She had an odd look on her face and seemed to be distracted, her eyes trailing off as she looked at something off camera. 

“Hello? Did you hear me?” I was pacing around my bedroom by this point, bursting to spill all the details of what had happened. 

“Yeah, sorry, I heard you. What’s going on?” She seemed to have her focus back on me now. 

I went into all the details of how the evening had gone from start to finish as I continued to pace around my room. I was feeling flustered and anxious about the whole thing the more I thought about it. I wasn’t even sure how to begin to make a decision about the job offer and I was completely avoiding my thoughts on Dieter. While his behavior pissed me off to no end, I couldn’t help but feel hurt all over again. Which was a feeling I didn’t want to acknowledge out of fear that it would send me spiraling all over again.

Lauren sat staring at her phone, wide-eyed. She looked overwhelmed with the word vomit I had just thrown her way.

“Ok, I need a minute to digest all of that,” she finally said. Her attention was again drawn to something else as an exasperated look formed on her face. 

“What the hell are you doing over there? Is somebody there?”

“NO! No, it’s…” She appeared to swat at something before she continued, “it’s a cat. I have a cat. A stray. It’s not staying. It’s kind of an annoying jerk,” she said with a nervous laugh. I wasn’t sure if I bought that. I gave her a skeptical look. 

“So, Dieter really said all of that to you? Seriously?” she asked, quickly changing the subject. 

“Yes, he did. He was a total asshole. He looked like he was on something. He’s like a completely different person.” I shook my head in disbelief.

“Did you ever consider that maybe he’s trying to piss you off on purpose? To push you away?” 

She had a sympathetic look on her face now. 

“Oh, I know he was trying to do it on purpose. I know him well enough to know when he’s putting on a show. He’s just not usually so cruel about it. I don’t know why he’s being like that.” I shrugged, unsure of what else to say.   

“Maybe you should try talking to him again. He’s kind of hardheaded. Perhaps putting some pressure on him might bring him back to his senses.” 

“No, you know what, let’s just not focus on him.” I paused briefly, shaking my head again, “I don’t even want to think about him. He’s made it clear how he feels.” 

“You can’t avoid it forever.” She gave me a pointed look. 

I threw my hand up in frustration as I rolled my eyes, “I’m not avoiding it. I’m accepting the reality of the situation.”   

Lauren rolled her eyes in return, “No, you're locking all those feelings away in a secret room in that pretty little head of yours and pretending they don’t exist. I know how you are. You’re both so fucking stubborn.”

I was taken aback by how blunt she was being. That was usually my role. 

“Ok, whatever. Can we talk about Carrington now? What should I do about that? I mean, if I take the position in Silicon Valley, I wouldn’t really have to see him once things got settled. So, if there were vibes, it would be a non-issue, right?” I drew my brows down together as I contemplated that choice. 

Lauren sighed heavily before she responded, “Look, I can’t tell you what to do about that. All I can say is don’t make a choice based on a man. Any man. You’ve wasted too much of your life doing that. Don’t take the job just because you want to get away from Dieter and don’t not take it because this Carrington guy may or may not have been flirting with you. You do what you want, then we will deal with what comes after.” 

She was very matter of fact in her response. Even though that wasn’t the answer I wanted, I knew she was right. I needed to remove the men from the equation and figure out what I really wanted. Lauren spoke up again, pulling me from my thoughts, “Sorry to cut it short, but I gotta go. I need to feed this cat, so he’ll chill out.” She was fighting a smile. 

“Why do I feel like you're talking in code about something else?” I gave her a confused look as she started to laugh. 

“Oh, gotta go. We'll talk tomorrow. Bye.” 

She did not even give me a chance to say bye before hanging up, “What the hell was that about?” I shook my head as I set my phone down on the docking station. There was definitely something going on; her behavior during the call was kind of bizarre, so was the excuse about the stray cat. As if I needed something else to wonder about.   

I decided to finish getting ready for bed after that. Even though my mind was racing with so many different thoughts brought on by the day’s events, I was happy to settle in for the night. I laid there for some time, waiting for the melatonin to kick in. It seemed like it took a little longer than normal, but sleep did finally take me. 

Two weeks after my dinner with Carrington, I still hadn’t decided. Luckily, he was understanding and said I still had some time to think about it. Lauren was still being weird and dodging questions. I had reached a point that I didn’t care what she was up to. If she wanted me to know, she would tell me. I already had too many things on my plate to worry about. Of course, the universe still wasn’t satisfied with my long list of troubles and decided to add to it.

I was sitting on the couch, attempting to read a book in between my spells of wandering thoughts, when the doorbell rang. To my surprise, it was Gabby. We hadn’t talked at all since news got out that Dieter and I were no longer together. She would send the occasional text to check in on me, but that’s it. Honestly, it was too hard for me to talk to her. It only made me miss him and the life we were building together even more. 

Gabby greeted me with a tight hug. When she pulled away, I could see the worry in her eyes. 

“I’m sorry to just barge in on you, but I wanted to talk to you in person.”

She gave me a nervous smile as I waved her in and led her over to sit on the couch. She had a tentative look on her face as she asked me how I was doing. 

“I’m actually ok. I’ve just been keeping busy and focusing on work mostly.” It was hard to meet her gaze, because I knew that if I did, I wouldn’t be able to hold it together. Her eyes reminded me of her brother’s, which seemed to unearth the raw emotion that I had managed to keep locked away thus far. It was all simmering under the surface for me, and I knew it wouldn’t take much for it to start peeking its ugly little head out of its hidden room.

“Have you seen any of the gossip sites lately?” She started to rub her hands against her thighs, clearly nervous to bring up the topic of her brother. 

“Uhm, no. I try to avoid all that stuff these days. I don’t want to know what your brother is up to.” My chest tightened at the mere thought of him. I rubbed my shoulder with my right hand, trying to remain calm and grounded. It was impossible though. 

Gabby sighed heavily, “Talia, it’s getting bad,” she said, and I could hear how upset she was. “Every other night he’s out partying with Anna, and he’s gotten into several confrontations with random people at bars and clubs. He isn’t acting like himself at all. I think he’s using something, but I don’t know what it is. We tried to talk to him about it and now he won’t even speak to us. I’m really worried about him.”     

I could feel her eyes on me as I stared at a random painting on the wall. Focusing on the swirls of color and different brush strokes to distract myself from what I was feeling. 

“I’m not sure why you’re telling me this. I can’t do anything about it. He’s made it pretty clear how he feels.” 

“I don’t know what his fucking problem is, but he loves you. I know he does. We could all see it. I think he would listen to you if you would just talk to him.”  She had an edge to her voice as she spoke. She never took her eyes off me. I briefly glanced over at her. The fear in her eyes nearly broke me. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes as I looked back toward the painting. 

“I tried Gabby. The night he called and ended it... I had a flight booked for the next day and he told me not to come. He lost his shit when I asked him if he was on drugs. He doesn’t want to talk to me.” 

She reached over and grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly, “You should have gone anyway. I really think if he sees you in person, he’ll listen.”

“I saw him… Two weeks ago. He was an asshole and made it pretty clear that he didn’t want to speak to me.” 

I let out a shuddered breath as I looked down at our hands. Telling her that I couldn’t do anything to stop her brother from hurting himself was one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. 

“Maybe if we all tried. I’m pretty sure he has blocked everyone at this point, but we could all show up at his house and talk to him.”  Her voice was strained. I could tell she was trying to keep her emotions in check as much as I was. 

“Gabby, I just don’t think you can help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.”

I looked up at her and watched as she knitted her brows together at my words. A mixture of frustration and anguish written all over her face. 

“You’re not even gonna try?” 

“I can’t,” I said quietly. The tears finally spilled down my cheeks. 

She shook her head from side to side, not understanding where I was coming from.

“Why not?” 

“Because…if I give in, he’ll completely consume me. And if I can’t get through to him, then you’ll lose both of us. I know I won’t be able to come back from it and that scares the hell out of me.”

I could see the fight drain out of her body as she took in what I was saying. I cleared my throat. 

“I guess I should probably tell you, I’ve uhm...been offered another job. I have a choice of going to New York or Silicon Valley. I haven’t made my final decision yet, but I’m leaning toward accepting one of them.”

She couldn’t hold back her tears any longer, “You guys are really over, aren’t you?” 

“Yeah, I think so.” I shook my head in agreement. The tears were now blurring my vision as I felt my face tighten. I gave up on trying to hold it back. She pulled me in for another tight hug.

“I want you to know that I still consider you to be part of this family. I don’t want you to forget that. I’m still holding out hope that fate will bring you guys back together somehow. I’m convinced you two are meant to be.”    

I pulled away, giving her a small smile as I thanked her for being there for me when she didn’t have to be. She left soon after that with promises to keep in touch. After she was gone, I laid down on the couch. I stared at the ceiling for who knows how long, completely disassociating. Once I finally came back to my thoughts, I couldn’t help but to question every decision I was making. I felt lost and now I had the added concerns of Dieter’s wellbeing. I had managed to ignore that piece of the puzzle thus far by isolating myself from the knowledge of what he was doing. Now that I was aware, it was going to be hard continuing to ignore it.

A/N: Happy Friday y'all! How are we feeling about asshole Dieter? That was some seriously rude things to say to poor Talia. How about that dinner with Carrington and his offer (and maybe flirting)? And what the hell is Lauren up to? Also, Gabby is seriously breaking my heart right now. So, just another warning...the next chapter is going to be A LOT. When I say they hit rock bottom, I mean it. It's all (slowly) uphill after that though... Chapter 24 is complete and currently with my beta. I'll post the teaser on Monday. The chapter will come as soon as we are done with final edits. 💜

Lastly, everyone give a big thank you to @for-a-longlongtime for her excellent beta skills. She never fails to take things up a notch.

Sound off about your thoughts and feelings for this chapter. You know it gives me life. 😉 As usual, I have included the mood board for this chapter below.

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Tag List: @rhoorl @bitchwitch1981 @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @for-a-longlongtime @hisandsnakes @chaoticfestninja @survivingandenduring @partyofone3413 @cakipy-blog @titlee78 @poodlebae @guelyury @weho2kcmo @missladym1981 @maried01 @alokaerza @samiamproductions @misstokyo7love @themonadiaries-blog @madnessofadaydreamer @pedrostories

Let me know in the comments below if you would like to be added to the tag list.

#dieter bravo #dieter x ofc #dieter bravo fic #Destiny & Deliverance Series #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #dieter bravo x ofc #pedro pascal character fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #Pedro Pascal Fanfic #dieter bravo x oc #dieter bravo fluff #dieter bravo fanfiction #pedro pascal smut #the bubble #the bubble fanfiction

[goldenbuckyyy]

THE ONE

Summary: Three years later, Harry sees you again.

Pairings: Harry Styles x fem!Reader (exs)

Word Count: 3.7kish

Warnings: None. Maybe ambiguous ending?

A/N: Here’s the final part for my power mini series. 🥺 I was honestly debating on how I should end this one. I was going to go a different route for this ending, but I just couldn’t see the reader doing that. I hope you all enjoy. Thank you for taking this journey with me. 🫶🏻 Song inspo: “The 1” by Taylor Swift.

Also thank you for 900 followers. 🥹🫶🏻 Thank you all for showing me so much love!! 💓

All my mistakes are my own. Please do not repost or translate my fics on any other site nor this one.

I appreciate any likes, reblogs, messages, and interactions.

Series Masterlist || Masterlist

Harry always wondered why he let himself make the choices he had made all those years ago. 

He tells himself he was weak. He was too young to know any better. But in all honesty, he was an idiot. He was too dumb to see what he had right in front of him.

And it’s a mistake he has been paying for since the day it happened. 

He had made a mistake the minute he had let Olivia kiss him. 

He often wonders what was going through his mind when he allowed himself to let her lips touch his. He remembers being hesitant, but he also remembers not pulling away.

It wasn't because he was infatuated with her. She didn’t have anything he wanted or needed. He was a millionaire already. A household name. And his celebrity status was only growing by day. 

He didn’t need more fame. He was good with his money. He didn’t need Olivia’s name tied to his. He already had yours tied to his. A wonderful actress and a name most people already knew. 

Not because of him. You were just known because you were that good. 

It was lust. 

Lust for another woman. Someone other than the love of his life. 

Lust because of the way Olivia’s green eyes always followed his every move. The way she’d invite him to her trailer to help him rehearse when you weren’t on set and the sneaky touches she’d do to get his attention. 

Harry tried to resist her. Did his best. But he fell weak to his sins and let her kiss him that one night. 

And it was downhill from there. 

He let his lust for Olivia cloud his judgement and he lost the love of his life because of it. 

And now… five years later, he’s still with her. Trying to make it work, but not seeing a future with her. But not wanting to leave her because if he leaves her, everything that he did was for nothing. 

All the pain he caused you was for nothing if Olivia and him break up. It’ll be a slap to the face. 

And he doesn’t think he’s brave or strong enough for that. 

Harry sighs as he twirls his iced vanilla latte in front of him. 

He was sitting in an empty cafe, but a cafe that you love. Or used to love. He didn’t know anymore. 

He was home in London for business, away from Olivia, and he needed to clear his mind. He felt lost within himself and wasn’t too sure what to do anymore. 

He felt unfulfilled, distracted, and unhappy. 

He was almost thirty-two years old and felt empty. His shoulders are sagging as he feels the weight of the world on them. He gulps down the dryness he feels as his thoughts seem to overtake him and proceeds to sip on his coffee. 

He hears the door ring as someone walks into the small cafe. He lets his curiosity take over and peers up to look up at the stranger. 

It was barely seven am and the cafe was nearly empty. He wondered who the other morning bird was. Or a night owl. Depending on the way you looked at it. 

He stilled in his seat when he recognized who the stranger was. 

It was you. 

The last time he had seen you was three years ago at the Venice film festival where the night ended in a nightmare. He had spoken to you after that profusely apologizing for the events he caused, but you only listened to him to please him and told him to take care after his rant. 

He stopped bothering you after that. He didn’t want to be that person in your life anymore. So he stopped. He knew he had to let you go and it killed him. But he wanted you to be happy. 

But looking at you right now as you walked in, he still felt that feeling he hadn’t felt in years. He felt heat rush to his face as he watched you, his heart accelerating, and the smile that wanted to break out on his face making his lips twitch. 

He watched you as you walked in, holding your nude colored scarf close to your face to keep the cold December chill away from your face, your cheeks flushed with the cold air either way, and your entire body was covered by a darker nude colored oversized coat. 

You walked up to the counter, giving the barista your biggest warmest smile, throwing your hair back, and fetching your wallet from your bag. 

Your hair fell down your back and it was the longest he’s ever seen you have it. He let his eyes follow your every movement and it’s as if you felt him watching you. Because once you paid, your eyes found him, eyes locking together, and your smile didn’t falter. Your eyebrows crinkled together as your expression was shocked as if you couldn’t believe he was really in the same cafe as you. 

Harry wasn’t sure what to do. Should he stand up to greet you? Should he just wave and smile? Should he just look away and pretend he wasn’t just caught staring at you? 

He didn’t have much time to weigh his options because you were walking towards him already. He watched you as you walked towards him. Walking tall with your shoulders straight, and filled with confidence. You were glowing. 

He stood up quickly when you reached him. 

“Harry!” You exclaimed as you surprisingly wrapped your arms around him, pulling his entire body down towards you, pressing your cheek against his as you hugged him tightly against you, and Harry almost melted in your arms. His senses are filled with warm scents of your favorite perfume. 

Harry wrapped his arms around you and when you pulled away, he wished the hug hadn’t ended so soon. He was still in shock. He looks down at the woman he once called the love of his life and wonders if you are still the same person as before. 

You hold onto his arms as you look him up and down, “I can’t believe you’re in London right now! In this cafe! Wow!” You exclaim with a big smile as you look at where he was sitting. 

“Is this seat taken?” You ask as you gesture to the empty seat in front of him. 

Harry snaps himself out of his daze, quickly shaking his head, and gesturing for you to sit down. You adjust yourself into the seat, placing your bag on the back of it, and tugging off your scarf. 

Harry goes back to his seat, fumbling as he sits down, and watches you with a small smile. 

“You look amazing,” Harry says to you and you smile at him. 

“Thank you,” you say, fixing your coat around your body, and smiling at the barista who brings you your order. 

You place the big chocolate croissant in the middle of the table, parting it in your hands, and start to eat. Harry doesn’t miss the pretty ring on your ring finger, but he doesn’t allow himself to focus too much on it. His heart was tightening slightly. 

“You can have the other half,” you say casually as you chew your half. He hesitantly gets the other half, “Thank you,” he says as he munches on it. Thinking about what he should say. He doesn’t want it to be awkward, but he doesn’t want to say the wrong thing. 

“How have you been?” You ask him, sipping on your iced drink. 

Harry wipes his lips with a napkin, “I’ve been good. Needed to come to London for some business, but I’m heading back to LA at the end of the week.” 

“How fun! I assume congratulations are in order for your latest win,” you say with a cheeky smile and Harry blushes at your comment as he picks at the skin around his fingers. He wonders how you know.

Do you keep tabs on him like he does on you?

“Yeah, yeah. Thank you,” Harry says shyly at your compliment, his entire body showing how flattered he was.

“Don’t be coy with me,” you tease, “It’s another wonderful accomplishment. You should be proud.”

Harry sits up straighter at your words, “I am. I am, thank you. How have you been? I saw your latest film. You did wonderful, as always.” 

You play him off with a wave, “Oh shush.” You smile at him as you open your coat, opening it up to reveal your cream colored oversized sweater, and cross your legs under the table. 

You take a second to look at his face, your heart races underneath your chest, and you see how different he looks from the last time you saw him. 

His beautiful chocolate curly hair was long again, piled up on the top of his head in a messy bun, a couple loose curls fell down framing his face, and his dimples were caving into cheeks with his shy smiles he was giving you. You secretly wondered why he had decided to grow out his hair again, but you continued to sip on your drink as you watched him. 

The conversation between you two flowed easily, almost never feeling awkward, and you both feel thankful for it. 

Harry could see from behind you the people passing by, taking their photos of him and you, and the internal anger he felt because of it never left him. He always hated that people tried to get the best photo of him whenever it got leaked where he was. And now that he was here with you? For the first time since the break up, since the messy Venice film festival drama that neither of you commented on, and now you’re both enjoying a drink together. He wonders how much the highest bidder will get paid. 

The conversation never leads to Olivia nor Sebastian. Harry knows you’re still with him, but as to only what he sees on social media. But he’s too much of a coward to ask you about it. 

It isn’t until Harry opens his stupid mouth and word vomits all over you. 

“I need to tell you something,” he abruptly exclaims, which makes your laughing stifle, and you nod at him to continue. Your hands clasping together on the top of the table to stop yourself from fidgeting.

“I want to tell you that.. seeing you right now, in front of me, makes me feel indescribable. I haven’t seen you in over three years and you’re still the most beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes on.” 

“Harry,” you start to say, eyes softening with sadness, and your lips frowning. 

“I have to say this, please.” He begs you, you frown, and nod for him to continue. 

“I want to thank you for loving me all those years ago,” he whispers, voice low, and almost as if he doesn’t believe he’s saying these words out loud.

“You loved me in a way that I have never been loved before. Never. Not by Camille, not by Kendall, not Taylor, and not even bloody Olivia. Okay?” His voice wavers and the way you’re looking at him right now makes his eyes swell up with tears. He takes a second to compose himself, pinching the bridge of his nose to keep his tears at bay, and he pushes away a couple strands of loose curls from his face. 

“You loved me with purity and honesty. You-you loved me with such force and passion… that I’ve been searching for that feeling for years since I left you. Nothing—and I swear to you— nothing has been able to fill the void you left in me. And that’s my mistake. And mine only.” 

His eyes are staring into yours, threatening tears in both eyes, and your nose is turning into that shade that shows him you want to cry. He silently curses because he doesn’t want to make you cry. But he knows this might be his only chance to tell you how he’s felt the past couple of years. Truthfully and honestly. 

Harry reaches for your palm that’s laying on the table top, the oval ring resting on your ring finger like gold, hesitantly he grasps your hand gently in his, and you let him. A rush of warmth runs through both of your bodies, but you both don’t show it. You bite the inside of your cheek to try and keep your emotions at bay.

You furr your eyebrows down as you wait for him to speak again. You raise your eyes to meet his own once again. Beautiful green eyes rimmed red.

Harry takes in a shaky breath, letting himself try to relax as he tries to not melt at the way his body feels touching your skin again, and he tilts his head as he watches you. 

Watches the woman that still looks at him with love in her eyes, the one that makes his heart skip a beat, the one who’s smile never fails to light up a room, the one who can make an entire crowd laugh until they cry, and who’s name is still engraved on his heart and soul. 

Your eyelashes flutter as you give him a small nod. Waiting for him to continue. 

“I made the biggest mistake of my life when I did what I did to you. I won’t recount all my wrongs, but you know them better than anyone else. I especially— especially regret,” he pauses slightly, “what I did to you at the after party of our movie.” He says the last part in a whisper. He’s ashamed of what he did. He felt ashamed for forcing himself on you that night. And ashamed for the lasting scars he made on you at that moment. 

“I know you may never forgive me— shit, I wouldn’t forgive me. But—“ Harry’s cut off by your words, “I forgive you.” 

Harry’s mouth parts open in shock at your words, his expression turns into sorrow, and he immediately looks down. He feels his tears covering his eyelashes as his lips tremble. Not fully believing the heart of gold of the woman in front of him. 

He feels you squeeze his hand in yours and he looks up at you. Red rimmed eyes and pouty lips. 

You look the same except your face is nothing but sincere. You nod at him with a smile. 

“It has taken me a long time to fully understand the events that transpired that night. I couldn’t believe it had happened for so long. Many long nights I spent wondering where we had gone wrong. Many that I spent cursing Olivia’s name. Cursing your name. Cursing my own,” you let out a sigh, “But.. everything happens for a reason. And whatever may that reason be… it’s the reason why all the events between us happened. We may never truly understand why we made the decisions we did… I may never understand why you did what you did.. but it happened. And I can’t hold onto the past any longer. I held on for so long— so so long.” 

Your eyes glisten as you watch Harry. 

“We can sit here all day long. Staring at each other and wondering about all the what ifs. We can even talk about it. But it won’t change anything. It won’t change what happened or has happened since. It doesn’t change the fact that I’m a completely different person from when we were together. Just how I know you are. We’re not the same people we fell in love with.” 

Harry can bet a million dollars that isn’t true. You’re the same woman he fell in love with. But he won’t say that. 

He lets you continue, his thumb brushing against your warm skin as he used to also do. 

“We can sit here and pretend that we weren’t madly in love not so long ago. So in love that we didn’t care what people said and we did so without shame.” 

Harry closes his eyes as he tries to memorize your face in his mind before this ends. 

Your soft voice continues, “I miss you.” Your voice almost cracks at the words, but compose yourself quickly. You clear your throat with a cough.

Harry’s eyes open in surprise, deep regret written all over his face, and he opens his mouth to speak. But you hold your hand up to stop him. 

“I miss you in a way that I would miss an ex best friend. I miss our talks. I miss the way you never judged me. You never bullshitted me. You’d always tell me what you were thinking and I never had to second guess you. We were perfect together. But life happens. Mistakes were made and now…” 

You lean forward, gripping his hand in yours tightly, and lean your face against your enclosed hands. He does the same, soft tears falling down his cheeks, and you can feel your own cheeks wet. 

Harry feels as if he’s about to have a breakdown with the emotions he’s feeling right now. He feels overwhelmed. 

“Now I’m happy. I’m finally happy again. And I can't— I can't let you back in. I can't even let you be my friend. Sebastian wouldn’t have it. Because,” you pause and hesitantly continue in a whisper, “a part of me will always be in love with you. And if you’re in my life… I will never get over you. It doesn’t matter how many years have passed.” 

Harry cries at your words, his shoulder slumping down, and body shaking slightly with his tears. 

“If you’re not happy with Olivia,” you start saying and Harry looks at you with surprise, “Leave her. You deserve to be happy. So insanely happy that you can’t even believe it.” You squeeze his hands in yours. 

Harry nods at your words, knowing they’re true, eyes glistening, and your palm cups his cheek slightly. 

His face instantly melts in your palm, “I want you to know that there will always be a piece of you in me.” 

“Always,” you both say at the same time with a small smile. 

“I don’t deserve your time right now,” Harry whispers, eyes soft with sadness. 

“You deserve the world. We all make mistakes. Some are worse than others, but it happens.” 

Harry nods at your words and he knows it’s time to say goodbye. Not knowing if it’s forever or not. But knowing it’s the right thing to do. 

“I should let you go. Let you get back to him.”

You agree with a hum, gathering your belongings, and standing up as he does the same. 

Harry is the first to pull you into a hug, wrapping his arms over your shoulders, holding you tightly against his body, and your arms wrap around his waist. Your head on his chest and Harry feels something against his waist. A small protruding belly. 

Harry pulls away from the hug, looking down in confusion between your bodies, and sees for the first time your belly. 

His jaw slacks down, mouth parting open in shock, and he wonders how he hadn’t noticed earlier. 

He looks up at you with a confused face, “You’re…” He can’t even ask the question. The words he was going to ask were getting stuck in his throat. 

You beam up at him, pretty eyes twinkling, “I am.” 

“Wow,” he breathes out, heart breaking a little bit, and he can only smile. 

“Congratulations, you must be so excited. I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks, B-Harry. I am,” you repeat with a smile and you reach up to kiss his cheek gently, his cheeks tint pink. Harry doesn’t catch the name you were about to call him. 

“I’ll see you later,” you say, pinching his cheek slightly with a smile, and you both watch each other for a moment. Taking it in together. Both eyes taking in every inch of each other. 

You walk away from him after squeezing his hand once more. Once you reach the cafe door, taking one final glance behind you, looking at Harry, and you smile at him. You wave your hand goodbye slowly and Harry waves back with a deep inhale to try to calm his nerves. 

It kills him to see you walk away from him. 

He watches you from the window. Watches your hand go to your lower belly on instinct. Carrying a child that isn’t his. Will never be his. And he knows you're happy. 

He can see it in the way you walk, the way you’re dressed, and by simply the way you are carrying yourself right in front of him. 

It’s the way he could see it when you were sitting in front of him mere minutes ago. With a smile on your face. The soft smile you had reserved for him. He didn’t know if that was still the case. But deep down, he wished it was. 

He could see it in the way your cheeks blushed pink by his compliments, but that’s all it was to you. A compliment from a man. That’s all.

He wasn’t the love of your life anymore. 

He was just the man you used to love. A man you used to be in love with. A man you used to picture your life with. 

And it killed him inside that you were now living a life he wasn’t familiar with. 

He didn’t know what your favorite color was anymore. Your favorite food. Your favorite movie. Your favorite memory. Your favorite snack. He didn't know any of that anymore. 

It makes his soul ache in a deep part of his body. He feels his lips tremble slightly as he keeps his eyes on you. He knows he looks pathetic. With that sad look on his face as he watches the only person he’s ever truly loved walk away. 

But… 

There’s always a bigger piece in him that feels at peace knowing you’re happy. 

That even though he didn’t end up being the man you married and had children with… that you were still living the life you both had planned once upon a time. 

Even if it’s without each other. 

Harry can only hope he is lucky enough to have the same ending one day.

He just wishes it was with you.

#harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry styles x fem!reader #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles #harry styles writing #harry styles au #harry styles angst #harry styles fan fic #powerau #exs #harry edward styles

[melodygatesauthor]

Why haven't you updated A Bit Doggy??

Oh hi Nonnie. How are you doing? You good? I sure hope so.

I was going to ignore this, but honestly I found this pretty rude the way you’re asking and I think I’ll use this as an opportunity to educate you and anyone else who thinks this is an appropriate way to approach writers when asking this kind of question. - and yes I’m going to call special attention to the fact that you wrote “doggy” instead of “dodgy” because if you’re going to demand something of me so rudely at least check your autocorrect my guy. But I digress.

Please read below the cut:

Firstly, I understand you’re excited about the next update. I am too. There are nice ways to ask and buddy…this ain’t it.

“Hey, I am so excited for the next chapter of A Bit Dodgy, I know you’ve been busy with other projects and real life, do you have an ETA for the update? No pressure I’m just very excited.” - this shows me, and other writers, that you’re respecting my time, which IS important despite what YOU may think. It also shows me that you’re not applying pressure to me.

When you say:

“Why haven’t you…?” What am I supposed to say to this? Why does it matter WHY I haven’t updated it? That’s quite frankly NONE of your business. Logically you can assume that there’s probably a good, and sometimes personal reason for WHY someone hasn’t updated.

Secondly, I’ve already made 2 posts explaining WHY I haven’t updated and WHEN I plan to update on both THIS blog and @melodygatesupdates. Big pro tip here pal, maybe look through my blog a bit before coming in with a rude question like this.

Clearly you’re following me and paying VERY close attention to when I post and don’t post so, educate yourself please.

Third, there’s nothing wrong with being excited about a story and wanting an update. I GET it. Writers know (and I can’t stress this point enough) WRITERS KNOW THAT THEY HAVEN’T UPDATED AND DON’T NEED YOU IN THEIR INBOX TO MAKE THEM FEEL MORE ANXIOUS.

Instead of asking why, you can say “hey, hope everything is going well. Excited for the next ABD update!” This tells me that you’re excited, and that you’re supportive of me and my time. That’s all the “nudge” that I would really consider appropriate.

That’s pretty much it. I don’t care if you find my response bitchy because quite frankly, it’s supposed to be. The reason I LEFT a smaller fandom I was part of was the lack of support from other writers, and ENTITLED SHITTY READERS. People who DON’T reblog and yet they demand updates and make requests. I’m sick of it. I don’t think I’ll ever leave the MK fandom but Nonnie, shit like this makes writers leave so keep that in mind the next time you want to come into someone’s inbox asking rude fucking questions.

Also, follow my fucking update blog so you can see when I DO make updates or tell people when I won’t be updating something. Hope that satisfies your curiosity.

#melody answers #melody talks #stop disrespecting writers #don’t as questions like this #it’s so fucking rude #I can’t express it enough

[slowips]

006.

alhaitham x reader

# 500 words.

.　⁺ . 　 ˚　✦　.　　+ ⁺　 　 . ✦

“sorry for staring, i was just trying to visualise the shape of your skull,” you say.

alhaitham stares at you, trying to digest your words that confounded him. he was talking about the evolution of languages, how did skulls sneak into your mind? you weren’t listening—that he is certain.

“the staring isn’t bothersome,” he slowly starts as he tries to gather his thoughts. you’re the only person who can make words he took years to study turn evasive. “though the fact you weren’t listening is. isn’t it your idea for me to teach you?”

your mouth rounds in a shape of an ‘o’ as your strong gaze falters. he wonders if you’ve found your answer. his skull should look no different from any other human being, so what did you expect to find?

“well, sorry for not listening then,” you admit before gesturing him to continue. “it’s not that what you’re saying isn’t interesting, don’t get me wrong. i was just… distracted.”

you grab the book that he held, skimming through the pages. there’s a hint of a frown on your face. if he speculated correctly, backed by various equally confusing experiences with you, that frown is a sign of regret for speaking your mind. too quickly. without thought.

“are you not going to elaborate on your claim?” he asks, slightly annoyed at how you hooked his curiosity without fail. “whatever you were distracted with seemed more important.”

you close the book, staring at the ceiling as if there are visible thought bubbles over your head.

“i bumped into kaveh the other day,” you continue, side-eyeing alhaitham’s response. he doesn’t give you a crumb, face deadpanned, even if he wants to roll his eyes. what might have kaveh planted in your head? “you know how i also want to learn how to draw… so… i asked him for a few tips.”

“and?”

“he said it was good to visualise what i want to draw in my head.”

“that’s no reason to be distracted.”

“you’re fishing for an answer, stop it,” you retort, narrowing your eyes. “that’s all i’m going to say, and don’t try to speculate or connect the dots here. i shouldn’t have said that, i’m sorry.” you grab the book on linguistics and stuff it into your bag.

alhaitham just watches, waiting to see when you’ll realise that’s his book. probably in a few days time, which is beneficial for him as it means he’ll meet you again.

“i’ll like to see your artworks,” he says as you stand, ready to leave. you pause and turn to face him.

“it won’t be that interesting.” you stare at the floor, letting out a weak chuckle. “but kaveh also said to always use references and i was thinking if you’d like—” you’re quick to clasp your hands over your mouth. “actually, never mind! thank you for today’s session. i’ll catch you some other time!”

and you’re off.

alhaitham sees your figure retreat in the distance and when you exit the library, he scoffs in an attempt to hide a growing smile.

──────── ✦

staring at people and trying to visualise their skull is a very normal thing that i do not do. trying to practice for alhaitham to get a sense of his character because he’s honestly so elusive to write but i couldn’t find a prompt so i made one on my own.

──────── ✦

This story is part of the LLF community project, which was created to improve communication between readers and authors.

FEEDBACK | this author invites and appreciates short/long comments, questions, constructive criticism, likes, and reblogs.

RESPONSE | this author selectively responds to replies & tags as they haven’t found an efficient way to reply to everything, and is more likely to resopnd to an ask.

#alhaitham x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #genshin x y/n #alhaitham x you #althaitham x y/n #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x y/n #/ #FEEDBACK FOR THIS IS RLLY APPRECIATED! u can say it is ooc and i’ll gobble it #ofc do elaborate and tell me why (pls) GAGAHA #i’m trying to practice before i write the story for my confession series #i have to… listen to his voicelines and analyse his sq #MAN….. i’m so bad at writing logical characters

[mazeinthemiroh]

park seonghwa boyfriend headcanons

genre: fluff

word count: 0.6k

warnings: none

requested?: yes

song rec: dancing like butterfly wings by ateez

pls like and reblog if you enjoyed! feel free to request anything <3

a lot of you were asking. begging. pleading for me to do seonghwa bf headcanons

i honestly can't blame you

this man. this... this angel on earth-

i love him, love him so much

probably the sweetest guy you will ever meet. he is very humble and honest and so considerate of others ugh. he's just perfect.

as a boyfriend, he tends to prioritise your feelings and well-being ahead of his own. he will go above and beyond to provide and take care of you, in both little and big ways

he looks at you with those big, sparkly eyes that he does i'm gonna cry like you are literally everything to him. all he wants to do is make you feel happy and loved and wanted and appreciated

he is very in tune with his and other people's emotions, so he is attentive and aware if your mood turns negative. he believes that if you are feeling sad, neither he nor your should force yourself to be happy again. he wants you to just go through what you need to go through; he will lend a shoulder to cry on, give you tissues, run down to the shop to buy your favourite snack and support you through these negative emotions. he knows from experience that just letting these negative emotions come and go is much healthier than fighting with them. he will reassure you and ask if you want him to stay with you or let you have some alone time

likes to cuddle you in the morning. he will roll onto his side to see your sleeping form and will smile softly to himself, stretching his hand out to stroke your hair. he will shuffle closer and place an arm around your waist, cuddling you from behind pls i'm so soft for this man

you must know that dating seonghwa requires wearing matching pyjamas 🤷 its true he told me himself!! seriously though he would think it so cute matching pyjamas with you. will probably take a bunch of selfies with the both of you in these pyjamas cos yall look so cute together (and thennn he will put these pictures as his lockscreen <3)

he's a very soft and fluffy dude. he just wants to snuggle under the blankets and cuddle you all the time. when you are both cuddling he would say corny stuff like 'i could just stay here forever✨' and it always makes you giggle, but he isn't joking!!! just holding you close in comfortable silence, sometimes talking about random things, he feels so safe and loved :(

seonghwa would very much appreciate if you indulge his interests. mainly his star wars and lego addiction. you don't have to be an avid fan like him but as long as you don't hate it i think you'll be fine lmao. he will also be very open minded to cool things that you like as well!

date with him would include:

going to the park / walking around the river - he just loves walking and talking with you. it gives you guys to hold hands or link arms while you catch up about what happened that day

lego dates - yes i said it. if you like lego just as much as he does, he would love to build lego sets with you. it's always fun because you guys are creating something together whilst talking about all sorts of nonsense he'll probably make it into a competition to see who completes their lego set first, my man is competitive af!

go to the theatre - this is kinda random but i can just see seonghwa wanting to get dressed up with you and heading out to see a play or performance of some sort. he likes trying new things and what better way to do that than doing it with you?

basically seonghwa sets the standards for all other men, so true

#park seonghwa #seonghwa #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #atz #ateez #ateez reactions #ateez headcanons #atz fluff #ateez fluff #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #requested #ateez x reader

[jasntodds]

DC Masterlist

Masterlist

Add yourself to my taglist

Library blog: @jasntoddslibrary​

Please do not plagiarize, translate, or repost my work. Reblogs and comments are always welcome. You can spam my notifications with them, honestly.

I will block anyone under 18 reading my 18+ fics.

SERIES:

Caving In (Gar Logan x Fem!Powered!Reader, Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader) - Completed May 26, 2023

Summary: “Tell me Atlas: What is heavier, The world or its people’s hearts?”

You never expected your life to end up this way, turned upside by an infamous Gotham villain. It’s been a living hell, every single day, until Dick Grayson brings you to Titans Tower where you meet Gar Logan and Jason Todd.

Petrichor - Caving In Book 2(Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader) - Completed April 23, 2024

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

Penance - Caving In Book 3 (Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader) - COMING SOON

Summary: ❝Thesus: Stop. Give me your hand. I am your friend. Herakles: I fear to stain your clothes with blood. Thesus: Stain them. I don’t care.❞ It’s been a month and a half since Crane’s reign of terror was stopped, leaving Gotham to finally return to normal. But, what is normal? After everything Jason and you have been through, it seems normal might be some unobtainable dream state. But that’s not going to stop either of you from trying and maybe, you’ll get lucky in the end. At the end of it, the two of you have suffered enough, right? Right?

TITANS: 

Garfield Logan

COMING SOON

Jason Todd

Deathstroke, prt. 2 

↳ Jason was sure he could take on Dr. Light but he didn’t account for him and Deathstroke to be working together. And he definitely didn’t account for both of you to be capture by them

Migraines 

↳ You have a migraine and try to hide it from Jason until you manage to faint in front of him, sending him into a worrying spin over you

Lost In The Bitterness 

↳  Patching up Jason Todd, Red Hood, at two in the morning on a Tuesday night was not exactly on your agenda. Especially given the history between the two of you.

Jason coming home from patrol (18+)

↳  Jason comes home from patrol with only one thing on his mind: you

Alive (18+)

↳  Red Hood shows up at your apartment only to reveal he’s your not-so-dead boyfriend

COMICS:

Jason Todd

Too Heavy

↳  Sometimes things get a little too heavy for Jason

Broken Heart Of Gold

↳  After Jason messes up on a mission, he goes to you

Burial Plot

↳  Jason thinks back on memories of your relationship

#titans fanfiction #titans fanfic #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd fanfic #jason todd x reader #jason todd x yn #gar logan fanfic #gar logan fanfiction #garfield logan fanfic #garfield logan fanfiction #gar logan x reader #gar logan x yn #garfield logan x reader #garfield logan x yn

[joyswonderland1108]

This is so fucking tiring.

Notice how my posts keep on being rants despite me trying to see the bright side of things? But the way this goddamn fandom treats both Jimin and Jungkook is absolutely disgusting (Again i’m not talking about the good ones out there, y’all know yourselves, kudos to you).

No wonder solos hate “OT7″ asses, i don’t condone any “solo’ness” but this fucking fandom gives them every right to hate their guts. Imagine loving a person so very dearly and a group of people who are supposed to treat that person with respect actually treats them like shit, how the fuck can you like these people or respect them. How do these oh so-called OT7s enjoy calling out solos when they can’t even call out themselves on some bullshit they pull out, learn to admit your own flaws before seeing other people’s flaws. 

Not only did people completely fail to see Jimin’s pov through his album, completely denied the symbolism in it, pulled lots of homophobic comments from their asses because they just can’t fucking accept that his album was queer-coded, wanted so bad to make “Like Crazy” a break up song when Jimin himself explained that it wasn’t inspired 100% by the damn movie’s story, ignoring completely that the boy made a whole album about his struggles and frustrations, something deep something that needed an open-mind and lots of understanding.

But now they’re completely ignoring the fact that “Seven” is a fucking single not just some images. Remember my post about Tiktok Army? Well they’re still at it. I keep on clicking on “not interested” but the way these videos are just so endless that they still pop up on my fyp.. Again i’m not linking any Tiktok i’ll post screenshots feel free if you want to consult the page but honestly i don’t want to give them clout

It’s all about the MV, explicit version, JK was topless in the ONE picture that dropped, y’all thirsty motherfuckers can’t even bother be excited for the actual single, and this is not even the worse Tiktoks out there, everybody is more concerned about it being explicit and having a woman in the MV, they’re all like “Oh well he was topless in the schedule picture that dropped which means the MV will be sexy, JK will be naked, JK will be grinding on Sohee” MOTHER.FUCKERS! Do y’all even care about JK? 

For all i know y’all smartasses, Jimin’s concept photos had him topless too, or specifically naked under a blazer but he was NOT in “Like Crazy” and in “Set me free pt2″ he was because he had a whole ass poem written on his chest, now what? Are we going to pretend this never happened? I swear it’s sickening they’re not even allowing us to enjoy the build up until July 14th, i try to distract myself but it ends up being there on my face no matter what. 

And to answer @milan1013 on your reblog about the live

There’s nothing wrong with the tiktok but the caption got me, because tell me why tf are people now shipping JK with Mingyu from a damn less than 2min Live knowing damn well these two are very dear friends. Again, i will say it again and again and FUCKING AGAIN!!!! JK is shipped with every living being, everything and everyone that breathes his way is shippable with JK that at some point do people even see him as a human being or.. ?

Sure it’s fun when it’s innocent all jokes ha ha but God fucking dammit the fact that out of an MV of a song that neither one of them even dropped, he’s already shipped with an actress and from a damn mini live he’s shipped with his friend now seriously where the fuck are we going, it’s becoming less and less fun each day to be in this fandom..

#jikook #minkook #Kookmin #mingukkie #LEAVE JIMIN AND JUNGKOOK ALONE YOU SICK ASSES

[thefandomenchantress]

Breaks down invisible door

Looks at you with firey eyes

Laughs

Hey hey hey looks like we both like Whace, eh? Care to share a few headcanons? I'll throw in a bonus! I'll reblog and add mine hehehe :3

Also BOOP

BOOP!!

Anyways, yeah! I do like Whace! Not only because the ship name is fun and silly, but also because I think the way Whit and Ace bounce off each other is a very entertaining concept. On with the headcanons!

-It took the two of them forever to get together, since Whit, what with his ever-present trouble with love, was too scared to try and confess his feelings. And Ace was also too scared, since he’s scared of everything but especially showing vulnerability like that. Eventually, Whit managed to tell Ace about his feelings, but Ace wasn’t sure if he was joking or not and so Whit had to try and clarify. Overall it was awkward but worth it when they finally got together.

-Whit loves PDA but Ace is very easily embarrassed by it. So they meet in the middle by doing secret PDA, like holding hands under the table where no one can see (Arei has made it her mission to catch them whenever they do stuff like that and tease them for it)(Ace gets mad and Whit gets disappointed because Ace will immediately stop doing whatever affectionate thing he was doing).

-Whit really likes doing Ace’s nails. Ace, comforted by the fact that he wears gloves most of the time so no one will actually see his nails, lets Whit do whatever crazy designs he wants. He’d never admit it but he really likes them.

-Similarly, Whit likes to try and do makeup on Ace. Ace can do eyeliner, so he’ll do that on Whit, but Whit likes to go all out. He’s always sad when Ace washes it off.

-They help each other with dying their hair. Whit’s is slightly more complicated, since he dyes his hair blonde and pink, but Ace tries his best. Whit has to help teach him how to properly just dye the edges the first time.

-Whit likes playing with Ace’s hair in general. Ace is a little cagey when it comes to letting people touch his hair but he doesn’t mind as much when it’s Whit.

-Whit finds much entertainment in teasing Ace just to see him all flustered. Whether that be with compliments, physical affection, or the occasional dirty joke (He likes to use atrociously bad pick-up lines sometimes, too, just to see Ace’s reaction).

-I’m not one to talk about nsfw too much…But Whit tops. ;)

-Hehe time for a very self-indulgent one. Whit found out Ace likes to read romance novels and would not let it go. Now they have a book club with just the two of them as members.

-Ace tends to get embarrassed when expressing his feelings for Whit through words, so sometimes he’ll buy him gifts instead, just small little things to show he cares. Whit keeps them all in a box to cherish forever.

-Whit has decided that Ace is his new favorite bed. He likes to sleep on Ace’s lap and chest, which confuses Ace, but he doesn’t really mind. Even on the off chance he does, he usually doesn’t have the heart to make Whit get off of him.

-Whit likes to tease Ace about how he’s one inch taller, calling Ace cute and petite and generally being a menace by pretending they have this huge height difference.

-Ace, being quite strong thanks to working out a lot, can carry Whit around. He usually does this when he’s fed up with Whit teasing him and wants to turn the tables on him. Sometimes it works, other times Whit just giggles and calls himself a captured princess.

-Whit loves to text 🩷 emojis at Ace all the time. An excessive amount, honestly. Ace will sometimes text him back <3.

-Ace will get really mad when someone is mean to Whit, unsurprisingly, but also unsurprisingly doesn’t do too much besides scold the person and swear at them. If someone’s mean to Ace, Whit won’t immediately do anything. But he‘ll get really quiet, making a 🙂 face, and on the inside you can tell he’s plotting their death.

-At every opportunity, Whit will take whatever pen/marker is lying around during class and doodle a heart on Ace’s arm. He thinks it’s cute. Ace glares at him whenever he does it, but puts in a noticeable amount of effort not to wash it off when he takes a shower.

———

Hmm, I think that’s all for now. Maybe I’ll add more if I think of any I forgot or if I think of any new ones. This list turned into a lot more than a few headcanons but I regret nothing.

#danganronpa despair time #drdt #whit young #ace markey #whace