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#i don't save fic so much though but i'm trying to change that
zarla-s · 7 months
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wife-of-all-dilfs · 5 months
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Hii! I love love love all of your finnick fics! Could I please request a fic where reader is also a victor from an earlier game and she is in an established relationship with Finnick. They both get reaped (not the same district) for the 75th games and reader gets critically hurt in the part where the cornucopia spins. Like she falls into the water after maybe being injured and she can’t swim, so Finnick has to risk everything to save her life.
I’m really looking for like a hurt/comfort with a seriously injured reader and Finnick going through hell to save her because he cannot imagine a life without her in it.
Thank you so much if you’re willing to write this or something like it, feel free of course to change anything to your liking!
two souls, one heart | f. odair
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summary: finnick refuses to lose the love of his life. your inability to swim complicates things, especially when the cornucopia begins spinning.
pairing: finnick odair x fem!reader
warnings: pre-established relationship, heavy angst, drowning, death, bone fracture
notes: thank you so much!!! i really enjoyed writing this, shed a few tears but still enjoyed it lmao. listen to 'beginning of the end movement v' by the newton brothers on repeat for the full experience <3
A quiet nursery rhyme was being sung by the water's edge.
The calm waves around the Cornucopia lapped at the rocks, the blistering sun causing the surface to sparkle. Wiress' voice interrupted Peeta as he mapped out the arena's clock-like wedges in the dirt. Everyone was focused on the map; you should have been too.
Dark blue ripples had your eyes captivated. So tranquil. So hauntingly beautiful. Loving the sea was in your blood, as your District Four was your home. You would think coming from a fishing district would mean your swimming abilities were mastered. In reality, they were practically non-existent. No matter how many times Finnick had attempted to give you lessons, they never stuck.
Neither of you seemed to care though, always too enraptured by simply being in each other's company—feeling Finnick's hands support your body as you floated on the surface...
"Don't you let go of me, Finnick Odair, or I swear to god I'll drown you."
"Will that be before or after you drown first?" he chuckled, though ultimately tightening his grip on your body in an attempt to reassure you.
....hysterically laughing when he got wiped out by a sudden wave...
"No way! I can't—" You broke into a fit of laughter— "I can't believe that just happened!"
"Are you laughing at me, sweetheart?" Finnick asked, trudging through the water towards you, his hair drenched and swept across his forehead.
"Yes!"
You doubled over, knees buckling as you struggled to contain your laughter. Despite trying to put up a serious front, Finnick too let a few chuckles slip at the hysterical sight of you.
"Oh really?"
Just like that, his arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you down into the cold water, earning him a squeal just before you crashed together below the surface.
...and washing up on the sandy shore in each other's arms, salty lips capturing one another.
"I'm covered in sand," you murmured against Finnick's lips.
He gave you another kiss before pulling away. "It's okay," he said, pecking your lips again. "I'll help you wash off in the shower when we get back." And then sent you a stomach-flipping grin.
Even though you wouldn't trade those memories for the world, if you had known your life would soon depend on the ability to swim, you would have paid much more attention to the lessons.
Finnick stood closely beside you, his trident digging into the dirt as he gripped it tightly in case of an attack. He had noticed your drifted attention, observing the way your eyes stared at the rippling water, like death was lurking just beneath the surface waiting to drag you down to the murky depths.
He could protect you from most things in the arena, but fear was something entirely different. A trident couldn't defeat the darkness in your mind.
A hand slid onto your lower back, rubbing gentle strokes to gain your attention. Your gaze tore from the blinding blue and settled onto Finnick's face beside you, watching his mouth curve into a light smile. You knew the silent words he was trying to convey: 'You're okay, sweetheart. I've got you.'
For a fleeting moment, the anxiety had disappeared. How could anything ever go wrong with Finnick by your side? The corners of your mouth quirked, preparing to send him a smile in response. But it never came. Something new had caught your attention. The woman by the water was no longer singing.
Wiress had been murdered.
The second Katniss let her arrow fly into Gloss' chest, everything around you seemed to explode into action. Anything that could go wrong would go wrong—Murphy's Law. And it did.
The Careers had initiated an attack.
Charging forward from the waterside was Cashmere, determined to avenge her brother's death. Instinct quickly kicked in and the spear in your hand was sent barrelling through the air and into her chest. As you watched her body slump to the ground, an enraged yell came from the side.
Finnick was fighting Brutus.
With your only weapon lodged within Cashmere's chest, aiding Finnick was impossible. Enobaria revealed herself beside Brutus, displaying her vicious fangs and throwing a dagger that sliced a small cut across Finnick's shoulder. Though the wound was minor, your heart lurched as he cried out in pain.
Before a single thought in your brain could form, your legs were moving. Not towards Finnick, but after Enobaria. Remember who the real enemy is—screw that. Finnick could have died. Your Finnick. He called out your name, his voice hoarse and frayed, but you continued on, hatred fuelling each step. It seemed Katniss and Johanna had the same idea, following behind you with their weapons bared.
Salt water sprayed onto your face, but you paid it no attention. Nor did you notice as the jungle surrounding the island began to blur into one overwhelming hue of green. Only when your body was thrown to the harsh rocky terrain did you realise what was happening.
The Cornucopia had started to spin.
Nothing could compare to the terror you felt as gravity's merciless force dragged your body toward the violent waves surging against the rocks. Just as your lower legs breached the edge, a hand grabbed onto your own. Katniss. She too was hanging onto Johanna whose only lifeline was an axe buried in the rocks.
A moment—that was all you were given to scan your surroundings. Supplies and sharp-edged weapons were flying everywhere. White water was spraying into the air. Finnick, who was thirty feet away, was gripping onto a rock ledge whilst keeping Beetee from sliding into the furious waves. His head turned to the side and even from a great distance, your eyes met.
It was at that moment you knew, you just knew the odds weren't going to be in your favour. God forbid you lived a simple happy life with the man you loved, days spent together on a calm beach. God forbid the Gamemakers gave you one last chance to be in his arms. God forbid you survived.
And with that sudden realisation, the universe, sick as it was, decided it was time.
Your hand began slipping from Katniss's; an unseen tear fell from your eye, and you smiled. A smile of goodbye sent to the love of your life. His face contorted into one of agony, lips moving but you couldn't hear his voice over the roaring waves. Still, you knew exactly what he was shouting.
"NO! NO!"
There was nothing he could do but watch your body disappear into the waves, repeating over and over "no, no, no," and praying his cruel eyes had deceived him. They hadn't.
Dark blue was in every direction you looked. The undertow tossed and rolled your body like a ragdoll in a washing machine and despite your attempts to swim, the surface only seemed to be slipping further and further out of your reach. Darkness engulfed you, so thick that you couldn't tell which way was up or down. That was when the panic set in.
Your arms and legs thrashed frantically, struggling against the water's force, desperate to reach safety or an air pocket. Cold water flooded your throat as you gasped uncontrollably. You screamed as every attempt at breathing felt like fire burning in your lungs. Finnick. Where was he? Where were you? What was happening? Why wouldn't it stop?
Thoughts submerged your mind in terror, and you were powerless to stop them. All you could do was feel. Pain. Fire. Burning
At some point, the Cornucopia had ceased its spinning and your body came to a rest in the water. An eerie calm suddenly washed over you; a sense of clarity stilled your wild movements. This was the end. There was no future. No hope. The world above wasn't yours to call home anymore. You now belonged to the sea.
Of course, your water-logged mind had forgotten that home was where the heart was, and your heart was still beating... above the surface, in the aching chest of another.
Tendrils of hair floated around your face like fronds of seaweed. Rays of sunlight penetrated the surface, turning the surroundings a vibrant sparkly blue. As you sank further down, the water, now a comfortable lukewarm, cradled you in its embrace. It felt safe, like being in Finnick's arms again. Like home.
You gazed at the sun's rays; they looked beautiful. You felt beautiful. But time was running out and the bright light soon began shrouding your entire vision, though not before you witnessed a dark figure dive beneath the waves.
**********
Finnick loved the ocean. He spent most days in District Four down by the beach, swimming, spearfishing, and watching the sun rise and set on the blue horizon. If he believed in reincarnation, he would have imagined himself to be a lionfish or dolphin in his past life, living in an underwater world, free from tyranny and oppression. He loved the ocean.
But that love was incomparable to what he felt for you. So, when he dove into the rocky waters to save you and felt the currents fighting against him, he determined there was nothing he hated more than the ocean. Not as he watched its strong grip drag your motionless body further down below him.
Your back had just touched the soft seabed when he swam far enough down to envelope you in his embrace. He should have swum you back to the surface immediately, but in his distressed state, he couldn't help but foolishly stare at your lifeless appearance. Your skin was blue. It's just the water's colour, he told himself. Your eyes were closed. She's just asleep. Your neck didn't pulse under his touch. She's... She's...
He had no justification for that. Feet planted firmly on the sandy floor, he propelled both himself and you back up to the surface. As Finnick paddled back to the Cornucopia, the others reached down and helped lift your limp body onto the rocks.
"Is she...?"
"Peeta," Katniss quietly reprimanded him.
Finnick paid them no attention. He said nothing but trauma screamed in his eyes. His breathing was ragged and his hands were trembling as he frantically checked your pulse again—in both your wrists and your neck; he even pressed his ear to your chest. All he heard was the waves lapping against the rocks.
"No," he whispered again.
It seemed to be all he could say anymore. No. No, this couldn't be happening. You were just standing beside him a few minutes ago; your eyes were just looking into his. However much he tried to deny reality, it didn't seem to make it any less true. You were gone.
He choked out a rough determined breath, interlocked his hands over your chest, and began pressing repeatedly over your heart. Wet strands of tangled hair were strewn across the rocks like dead seaweed. The usual soft pink accompanying your cheeks was nowhere to be seen, devoid of any life.
"Come on, sweetheart," he muttered before pulling down your chin to blow air into your lungs. The kiss of life. And when nothing happened as he pulled away, he restarted the chest compressions. "Oh, don't do this to me," he begged, voice breaking. "Don't do this. Breathe."
Any moment now. Any moment, your eyes would flutter open, the colour would return to your glowing skin, and your heart would beat with life beneath his hands. Your lips would whisper his name and he would pull you into his arms, where he would keep you safe until the end of time.
"Breathe."
Thirty compressions. Two breaths. Nothing. He did it again. Thirty compressions. Two breaths. Silence. Maybe he should've just ripped his heart out and replaced yours with his own. Death would come for him within seconds but hearing something beating inside your chest would've made the sacrifice worth it.
Life would flash before his eyes and your beaming smile would be the last thing he'd get to see. His last thought would be of relief that you were alive.
Johanna rested a tentative hand on Finnick's shoulder. "Finnick, she's—"
"No, she's not!" he exclaimed, continuing his movements. "She's fine. Aren't you, baby? You're fine." He cupped your jaw, his thumb stroking your soft skin before he pressed his lips to yours and blew twice. "You're fine."
The golden bangle around his wrist glimmered in the sunshine as he pressed on your ribcage. All he had to do was keep you alive until Plutarch rescued everyone. One simple task and he failed.
"Finnick, we have to go," someone said. Who? He didn't know nor care.
Leave me, he wanted to say. Leave me here to die. Let the Careers mutilate my body, take my life, my last breath, but let it be by her side.
Something cracked beneath his palms and he knew one of your ribs had fractured. His arms stilled, half-expecting you to cry out in pain but then he remembered. And with that sickening crack came a devastating realisation—you really were gone.
A sob erupted from his throat and his head fell to your chest, drenching your already-soaked wetsuit with hot tears. Everything else seemed to disappear. The arena, the Careers who could attack again at any moment, the spectators who were avidly watching. Everything.
It was just him and you. He didn't care that his screams and deafening sobs could bring unwanted attention or jeopardise the group's safety. Any tribute with half a mind would know crossing him in such a state would be a fatal flaw. Even if they did, it wouldn't matter. Nothing mattered. Life no longer had meaning.
Finnick pulled your lifeless body onto his lap and cradled you protectively in his arms, lightly rocking back and forth. His forehead rested against your own, cold and damp. You always were the cold one, needing his touch to light a fire beneath your skin. He loved having you rely on him for warmth, but not like this.
"Come back to me, baby, please," he begged almost inaudibly. Tears were running down his cheeks as he brushed pieces of hair away from your face. His lips were on yours once more, heartbroken and painfully delicate; not to fill your lungs with air, but to fill your heart with his love in the hopes it would be enough to bring it back to life. "Don't leave me."
Pleas, prayers, begs, and wishes flew past his lips, over and over. And then they stopped and Finnick simply stared. Silence fell across the entire arena. The birds didn't chirp, the other tributes remained quiet, and the trees stood still. Even the water had calmed, resembling a perfectly flat mirror.
Finnick only had three words left on his tongue. Three final words to give you, wherever it was that you were. He slowly leaned down, squeezed his stinging eyes shut, and pressed a long farewell kiss to your forehead. His eyes remained closed as he parted from your skin, unable to take another look as he whispered his final goodbye.
"I love you."
And then, for the first time since he had rescued you from the blue depths, he felt his heart beating again. Just like yours was.
**********
There was a voice, distant yet reassuring—a lifeline to consciousness. Black was all there was. Coldness was all that was felt. It was desolate. But that voice... that voice was so anguished yet so familiar and encouraging that it lit a fire inside your chest, warming you from the inside out.
In the distance of the dark void was a figure, their body made entirely out of a pulsating golden light. Each word the voice spoke enhanced the light's brightness. "Come... me, please..." Brighter. "Don't leave..." And brighter.
The light was warm and comforting, just like the voice attached to it. Whoever's voice it was that brought the light resonated deep in your mind, tugging at the strings within your heart.
Your heart.
The thumping in your chest was weak, almost non-existent, but it was still there. Though it seemed time was running out. Pitch-black darkness outweighed the golden light ten-to-one; you could feel its cold breath creeping onto your back. So, you started running towards the figure. Sprinting. Until all that surrounded you was golden.
"I love you."
Water. At first, it came trickling out in two fluid streams from the sides of your mouth. Then suddenly, it was spraying into the air as choked coughs forced the liquid from your burning lungs. Light flooded your vision—not golden and inviting, but vivid and overwhelming.
There was something warm beneath your legs, against your arm, rubbing at your back, holding you in an upright position. While you heaved, dry-retched, and gasped, that soothing warmth remained.
As your airways began to clear and the expulsion of water ceased, your half-lidded eyes rolled around the area. Still dazed and disoriented, you struggled to make out what surrounded you. There was immense rippling blue, vibrant hues of green in the distance, dark rough grey beneath you, and elongated blobs of colour that stood a few feet away.
"Just–just keep breathing, sweetheart." That voice. The one belonging to the figure of light that brought you back. It was madly repeating the same words over and over. "You're okay", "Deep breaths", and "You're alive."
Shaky fingers brushed the stray wet strands of hair from your face. So warm. With the little energy you had, your head turned to seek out the golden light again. And you found it.
The blinding sun shining down reflected off his bronze hair, turning it a divine golden hue. His brows were raised and scrunched together as though he couldn't possibly believe what he was seeing. Deep lines were etched into his tear-streaked skin, evidence of his previous turmoil. Those sea-green eyes stared at you, afraid that if he so much as blinked, you would fall lifeless in his arms once more.
"You're here," he whispered.
Finnick. YourFinnick. Your light.
When your eyes met, a splitting grin lit up his face, made up of an inconceivable amount of raw emotion. You weren't sure what to do—smile, laugh, cry, kiss him? Your mind was scrambled, overwhelmed with love for the beautiful golden-haired man in front of you.
Without warning, your face scrunched up and the tears began flowing. You weren't sure why you were crying. Maybe it was because you had just been brought back from the brink of death; maybe it was because you couldn't believe someone actually cared so deeply about you.
Finnick cradled your face in his hand. "It's okay," his voice trembled, tears now cascading down his cheeks. His smile, however, never disappeared. "You're okay. You're safe now. I'm not letting you go."
He took your face into two large hands, brought you to his lips, and pressed a tender kiss to each tear that rolled over your skin. One of your hands rested over his; the other was placed against his chest, feeling it rise and fall so you could synchronise your breaths.
His arms moved to pull you tightly against him, almost like he was trying to merge your body with his. Or perhaps, it was your soul. You didn't care about the pain aching in one of your ribs. You wanted to tell him that his soul was already intertwined with your own, but words couldn't describe the sentiment as profoundly as you felt it.
In the simplest of terms your water-logged brain could muster, you whispered, "You're my light, Finnick."
Brows scrunched together, he looked down at you, fighting back the urge to start sobbing in your arms. If he had been anywhere else, if there wasn't an entire country watching, he would've gone on for hours, explaining how stupidly, selfishly, and incredibly in love with you he was.
But he couldn't do that. Not now. So, he placed his hand over the one you had resting on his chest and readjusted its position. He could feel the thumping, even through your palm.
Your eyes were full of emotion as you stared up into his. You already knew what his next words were going to be and for the first time since you were thrown into the water from the Cornucopia, you smiled.
Rhythmically, your hand and his pulsed together. Finnick's gaze flickered across your face and he grinned. "You're my heart."
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yayakoishii · 8 months
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Want | Sanji x Chubby! Reader
Fandom: One Piece
Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x Chubby! Reader
WC: 5.5k
Genre: Fluff, slight Angst
Warnings: Sexual harrasment, derogatory terms for chubby people, mentions of blood, insecurities that lead to a bit of light self derogation (Please remember you're absolutely beautiful as you are <3)
A/n: The response on Hunger is insane. Over 700 likes?! I didn't expect much beyond a few 10-20 likes, thank you for all the love 😭 This is another self indulgent fic, more personal to me because I'm chubby myself so... I'm not super proud of the pacing tbh, but it's still pretty good, in my (biased) opinion, haha. I hope you enjoy it!!! ♡
also available on ao3!
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When you joined the Straw Hat crew, you didn't expect to fall in love with the blonde chef.
Actually, when you joined them, you weren't in the mindset to think about love and silly crushes. Your island had been destroyed by the Marines for a 'good cause' and despite the Straw Hats' best attempt, you were the only remaining survivor. Luffy kindly offered you a place on his crew, and you joined as an assistant to Chopper, slowly learning from him.
The first few weeks after you joined were tough for you, who had never travelled outside of your island. It took time to get used to the environmental changes along with the emotional grief of losing all your loved ones. The crew tried their best to cheer you up in their own ways, and you would forever be grateful for every one of them for at least trying, even if their methods weren't the most effective for you. It was the thought and the sentiment behind it that counted.
But what did work for you was… food. Ever since you were a child, you had loved food and it was the way you connected to life. Though you were not the greatest cook out there, you were capable of making things that were edible and quite good at times. On the ship though, you never had to cook, because Sanji would always do all the cooking. Whenever you offered to help, to take your mind off the pain you were feeling, he would kindly decline, saying that he would make you whatever you wanted.
But he couldn't. The dishes from your island were not recipes known quite to the rest of the world. Hell, even you didn't know all of them, save for some of your favourite foods that you had learnt from your mother. So you snuck in after dinner and made a dish from your hometown. It wasn't the best food you ever cooked, but it still meant something to you, because you were reminded of home.
You wrote down all the recipes you knew into a book, and kept it close. Whenever you missed your home, you would sneak into the kitchen at night and make yourself something with your wonky cooking skills that made the dish taste different every time. Still, the familiarity was enough to comfort you and let you wallow in the grief at the same time.
Until one day, you couldn't find your book.
"Nami?" You called unsurely to the navigator, who was lying on the deck under shade next to Robin. Behind them, Sanji was serving drinks. The three looked at you in question and suddenly under the scrutiny, your confidence faltered. "Um, uh.. d- did you see a journal somewhere? I can't find mine…"
"The brown one?" She asked, pushing her sunglasses up into her hair. You nodded frantically, hoping she knew. "I don't think I did. Did you check under your bed?"
"I did," you whispered, feeling the sadness wash over you again. It's not like you didn't still remember the recipes, but your memory wasn't the best. Without the book, it would be hard to remember them all.
"Don't worry, we'll find it," Nami got up and reassured you, looking concerned. "Sanji. Robin."
The two of them nodded along and then the four of you were searching for it everywhere, until Sanji had to excuse himself apologetically because he had to go cook lunch. You could only nod, trying not to get down in the dumps again over a book, but it felt a little hopeless. Until you heard Sanji shout from the kitchen. The three of you ran over to find him scolding Luffy, your journal in his hand.
"I just wanted to see what was in it!" Luffy pouted, his rubbery hands swinging around to try and get it back.
"That's an invasion of privacy, Luffy!" Sanji looked angry, but you were too relieved about the fact that you had found the book to get upset with Luffy.
"It's okay," you said, reaching forward to get the book. "It's just… recipes, Luffy. From my hometown."
There was silence in the kitchen for a few seconds and Luffy's face dropped into a serious look.
"I'm sorry," he said, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. "I thought… If I knew how to help you, you'd be happier."
It made you laugh softly, your heart warm at his kind intentions.
"Thank you, Captain," you smiled at him, eyes crinkling into crescent moons. "I am happy here. I just… miss my home, sometimes."
He wrapped you into a hug and Nami ruffled your hair a little. You smiled under the attention, holding the book close. Sanji for once was quiet, just staring at the book thoughtfully, though you didn't notice it then.
A few days after that event, Sanji called you to the kitchen before lunchtime. Curiously, you followed him to find… a plate of your favourite dish from your hometown. It was plated beautifully, making it look fancy and yet it still had that homey feeling to it. Sanji didn't say a word, just held out the chair for you to sit. You sat down in a daze, too focused on the smell of it lingering in the room.
It smelled like home.
And when you tasted it, you burst into tears. Because it tasted like home. It tasted exactly like your mom's. All the tears you had held back to not worry the crew were now spilling out without any end but you didn't care. Here, where only Sanji could see you, you let it all out. He didn't say anything, just placed a gentle hand on your shoulder and squeezed to let you know he's there for you. You turned around to face him, but the tears made it all blurry. Knocking your head against his stomach, you cried harder.
Sanji just held your head, carding fingers through your hair in comfort, offering you a handkerchief. That, you realised later, was the moment your feelings for Sanji began.
After that day, you became a lot happier. Somehow, without words, just eating the food that Sanji made was enough to heal your broken heart bit by bit. Sometimes, he made extra because Luffy was curious and wanted to taste it too; and then the whole crew wanted it so Sanji made a few of your dishes for dinner. In that moment, surrounded by the smell of home, around your new family, your heart finally started healing.
You started noticing Sanji everywhere after you got used to life on the Thousand Sunny. From the small things he does, to the loud expressions of love he made, everything about him seemed wonderful and warm to you. Because you knew that beneath his overt affections for all the ladies, he was an infinitely kind, caring and observant person. How were you supposed to not fall for him, when he went above and beyond for you?
And yet, for all his admissions of love, you never believed that he could truly like you back like you felt for him. You were after all, not the prettiest girl around and you knew that. You were not slim like Nami or Robin, and it's not like you absolutely hated your soft and squishy body. But you wondered if Sanji would like you even though you weren't pretty.
All that self consciousness went out the window every time you were in his presence. He never made you feel less, or ugly– in fact, the way he spoke to you always left you a blushing mess. He made you feel special, and in the moment, it would be enough. Until you saw him fawning over Nami or Robin, and then the sneaky voice in your brain would whisper quiet thoughts comparing you to them. You had no chance with him, and you knew that.
And that was fine. You could live with that, couldn't you? You had to, because wanting more than you should never ended well. All it would leave behind is rejection, hurt and awkwardness. So you pressed down the feelings and acted as normally as you could.
The moment you realised that you loved Sanji was probably a memory you would never forget. Although it was unforgettable for you, it probably wasn't particularly that unique to others. That didn't matter to you because it was a memory you cherished ultimately.
It happened when the ship docked on a peaceful little island. Everyone else was going out to enjoy their time, and you wanted to spend that time with Sanji. So, casually, you made your request.
"Sanji?" Your timid utterance of his name got an instant reaction from the chef, who straightened up and looked at you with hearts in his eyes.
"Yes, (y/n)-chan?" He asked, tilting his head slightly.
"Um, you're gonna go grocery shopping, right?" You had seen Nami complaining while handing him the money for the shopping.
"That's right," he leaned closer, almost too close but not quite into your personal bubble. Still, the proximity was enough for you to smell the mild smell of his perfume that left you a little weak in the knees. "Did you want me to get something for you, sweetheart?"
"I just," you hesitated, suddenly scared that he might realise your feelings and get disgusted. No, Sanji wasn't like that, you had to remind yourself. He would never treat you unkindly, even if he knew your feelings. "I heard you always do it alone. I thought you might enjoy some company?"
The hearts in Sanji's eyes disappeared as he stared at you like you were speaking gibberish for a few seconds. Under the intensity of that stare, you fidgeted and waited for his response.
"You're too kind, (y/n)-chan!" He finally cried, holding up your hands in his own bigger and colder ones. You flushed at the action, stammering out an actual gibberish response this time before you were whisked away by the blonde chef to town.
It felt all too much like a date to you, when you walked next to him. Sanji somehow made grocery shopping fun, or maybe that was just because of how much you liked him that anything with him was enjoyable? It didn't matter, you decided, because whichever it was, you couldn't deny that Sanji was equivalent to the sun on a cold day.
He enthusiastically showed you around, as if you were a tourist and he were a guide (when in fact, it was the first time in this town for both of you) causing you to giggle. Whenever you stopped to buy things, he would humour your curious questions on how to pick which vegetable and what cuts of which meat are the best. It felt awfully like a domestic date, one that made you smile when you imagined doing this with Sanji years down the line every week.
"And that's the last of it!" Sanji said happily, picking up the last bag. He was holding all the bags since the start, despite your insistence and now you were anxious, seeing him hold so many bags in his hands.
"Sanji, let me hold a few," you tried again, hands reaching out to take some of them. But Sanji just turned around so you couldn't reach the bags and grinned down at you.
"Nonsense, how could I let such a delicate lady hold such heavy bags?" His words made you flush in embarrassment. You were not delicate in any sense; surely, Sanji knew that too. And in spite of all his sincerity, the word just felt like it was mocking you.
"I'm… not…," you struggled to say, not wanting to argue but unable to keep it in either. With your chubby frame, no one had ever considered you as delicate.
"Let me do this for you, my love," Sanji's voice was soft and infinitely gentle, as if he was indeed holding something fragile in his hands. "I wouldn't feel good letting you carry anything when I'm more than capable."
"But Sanji!" you lightly whined, wringing your hands. "I don't feel good letting you carry all the burden either! Come on, just a few bags?"
Before Sanji could respond, you heard a scared squeak. Your brows furrowed and you looked around the marketplace, finding a man cornering a girl a few feet behind Sanji. She seemed uncomfortable and he was all in her personal space, saying something in a rough, sleazy voice that gave you shivers.
You were not a fighter, but the instinct to protect her overtook the rational part of your brain and you crossed the distance to where they were. Pushing him back, you stood in front of the girl to block her from him.
"Can't you see she's uncomfortable?" You said coldly. "Back off."
The man took an involuntary step back until his eyes fell on you. He reeked of alcohol and smoke and you felt like puking from the putrid stench coming off him but you held it together, trying to come off as more confident than you felt. His eyes roamed over your body shamelessly, and you felt dirty and uncomfortable from the action.
"Don't get in our business, fatty," he grinned, the smell of alcohol doubling the moment he opened his mouth. "Are you jealous that no one will ever give you the attention she's getting?"
The words stabbed you in the gut, even though you knew rationally that you were better off without the bad attention. That was the one perk of being conventionally average in looks– no one really looked at you, in good ways or bad. Or maybe you had just been lucky so far. But hearing him call you that, saying those words, even from someone like him, it hurt a small part of you. Before you could respond, a leg in black slacks came up and kicked the man down with such a force that everybody around paused, shocked by the sudden action.
Even you stepped back automatically, gasping when you saw that it was Sanji, still balancing all the bags perfectly while he had roundhouse kicked the man into the ground with so much force that you could see his teeth had become bloody and he was on the verge of unconsciousness.
"(Y/n)-chan doesn't need the attention of sewer rats like you," he said calmly, straightening back into position smoothly. "Her beauty only deserves the best of the best."
The sight of Sanji saying that with a calm face, his hair slightly tousled, his hands balancing the bags and his leg muscles rippling under the slacks – that image was imprinted in your heart and brain for the rest of your life. The words sent you into a shock, but when they finally processed, you couldn't deny the overwhelming realisation that crashed into you.
You love Sanji.
It wasn't just a silly crush, or something that could go away if you gave it time. The chef had unknowingly carved himself a place into your heart. He was taking over it, chamber by chamber.
"Sanji…" The word came out as a whisper, inaudible under the din of the market as people were talking about what was going on. You snapped out of it when you felt the girl behind you shuffle and you immediately squashed your thoughts down to examine them later. You turned around and asked her, "Are you okay?"
She looked very alarmed and upset, but she still shot you a grateful smile as she murmured, "Yes, thanks to you two."
"He didn't hurt you?" You asked, hands hovering over her as you looked to ensure if she was safe. A peek of crimson caught your eye when she raised her hand to rub her face. Her elbows had scraped against the rough brick wall in his tousling. "You have some scratches!"
"Oh," she turned her arms to look at the wounds, now feeling the burn after the adrenaline and fear response was receding.
"Come on, I'll treat it for you," you offered, opening your sling bag which had some emergency first aid. You usually carried it around for the members when you were off the ship, knowing that they were all too reckless to give a second thought to any wounds.
"Oh, no, no, I couldn't trouble you more!" She said, mortified but you gently shook your head, offering her a hand.
"It's no trouble," you reassured her. It took a little bit of convincing but she eventually calmed down and let you clean up the wound before you parted. Finally, you allowed yourself to look at Sanji, who immediately schooled his features so you wouldn't see the warm adoring look he was giving you the whole time. "Sanji… Are you okay too? You didn't hurt yourself, did you?"
"Do you think I'm that weak, sweetheart?" He smiled teasingly, but you felt the need to defend yourself.
"I know you are strong," you insisted, worrying your lower lip as you tried to look him straight in the eyes but kept getting flustered. "But even strong people get wounds. Just because they are strong, doesn't mean that they don't feel the pain. So tell me honestly, Sanji. Are you hurt anywhere?'
"No," he promised. "But if you're that worried, I'll let you check me all out back on the ship."
He ended that with a wink, and this time, you couldn't hold back the flush threatening to overtake your face again. Sanji couldn't help making the mood light again, but he had no idea of the effect his words had on you.
"Stupid," you weakly pawed at his arm, walking away before he could say anything. The blonde chef just laughed and followed you, face once again soft and fond as he watched you.
Sanji may have been one of the only people onboard who was oblivious to your feelings, because a few of them did figure it out after watching the way you interacted with him. The first ones to realise were Nami and Robin, who called you out on it when the three of you were lying under the shade on the sunny deck.
"Really?" Nami had scrunched her nose, eyes critically analysing Sanji as he walked (danced, really) back to the kitchens after serving drinks to the three of you.
"Really what?" You asked, too busy sipping the cool drink to notice that she had noticed the way you had warmly thanked Sanji and given him a bright smile.
"Sanji?" Nami gave you a pointed look. The name made you freeze, and you tried to play it off.
"What about him?"
"Oh, come on!" Nami threw the slice of lemon that was on her drink. You caught it before it could fall on your shirt and muttered an indignant 'hey!' that the navigator ignored. "You like him, don't you?"
The words were enough to make you hide your face in embarrassment. Robin was smiling knowingly from the other side of Nami and you felt exposed, like they had both just turned you inside out.
"I do," you whispered after the few minutes of silent mortification that Nami had spent in self satisfaction.
"Why that loser though?" She said without any real bite. You knew she wasn't actually demeaning him; it was affectionate, in the way one would talk about their sibling's lovelife.
"Because!" You whispered, eyes running everywhere to check if no one else was around to hear you. "Have you looked at him? He's literally so pretty! He is kind, caring, and so, so thoughtful and generous. Without expecting anything in return, he is always giving and giving and he makes my stomach do silly things. He has curly eyebrows, Nami! I didn't think those could look good on anyone. Hell, I know I would look ugly with them, but he makes it work! It suits him, and he's so beautiful and I'm just–"
You collapsed onto your chair, your wet fingers from the condensation on the drink glass finding purchase in the dips of your face to hide it. Just talking about him was enough to get your heart beating fast, and the mortification of what you had just spilled to the two girls made you want the ground to swallow you already.
"You really like him," Robin's soft observation made you relax. She wasn't teasing you. You turned to look at her and caught the comforting smile she was sending your way.
"I was going to say you could do better," Nami turned to face you, swinging her feet around to your side, "but after hearing all that, I think… You two are perfect for each other. Despite all his antics, he has a good heart. And you'll be good for him, because you see him as he is."
"Yeah?" You couldn't help the small flower of hope blossoming in your chest.
"Really," Nami smiled, a rare genuine smile that was usually reserved for late night talks and reassurances in down times.
"You don't think…." You trailed off, fidgeting with the hem of your top, "he won't… find me good enough?"
"Are you crazy?" Nami snorted, picking up her drink. The melted ice had made the level go up so much that it was threatening to spill any moment. "You're better than anything he could dream of. I told you, didn't I? You would be good for him. Having someone like you in his life to ground him, I think there's nothing better than that. You're one of the sweetest people I have ever met. If anyone here isn't good enough, it's him."
"Hey now," you frowned, ready to defend Sanji but hearing his voice stopped you.
"Who isn't good enough for (y/n)-chan?" His face was stuck in a weird smile, like he was forcing it. He carefully placed the plate of pastries he had brought as he continued casually despite the silence, "I don't know who we are talking about but Nami-chan is right. No one is good enough for our lovely (y/n)-chan."
"Oh, look at that!" You hurriedly switched the topic, looking at the plate he had brought. The tiny pastries were adorable and colourful, looking so delicious that it would have made your mouth water if you weren't distracted at the moment. "This looks so good, Sanji. Seriously, if you keep feeding me like this, my weight will keep increasing!"
The last line became a teasing complaint, but you didn't expect Sanji to come to the side of your chair and lean down to where you were tilted. The proximity caused your eyes to widen, the blood thundering in your ears as he carefully tucked in a stray strand of your hair behind your ear, face so soft and warm that it make your insides feel like they were vibrating.
"All the more for me to love, so I would keep winning, wouldn't I, sweetheart?"
You choked, and the need to get away from him before you did something wild like grab him and kiss him got so much that your knee accidentally shot up and into Sanji's back, pushing him forward. The chef's eyes widened at the sudden attack, but he managed to not collapse on you by quickly holding onto the sides of the chair but now you were trapped in between his arms on top of the close proximity.
It made you so weak in the knees, and there was something hot and warm curling in your gut as you stammered gibberish, feeling like you were about to faint because Sanji's chest was practically touching yours and it was all too much.
"SORRY!" He hurriedly backed off the moment he got his bearings, and for the first time since you had come onboard, you saw him have a genuinely heavily flushed face. There was a little blood starting to leak from one of his nostrils and somehow, it helped you calm down. He was just as affected as you were. The idea was enough to lessen your embarrassment by a little.
"I'm the one who's sorry, Sanji," you said remorsefully, hiding your face completely in your hands this time. "I kicked you!"
"It wasn't on purpose," he said, right hand coming up to hide the blush on his own face. "I'm sorry for… for making you uncomfortable, (y/n)-chan!"
Uncomfortable? Did Sanji have any clue just how comfortable you actually felt? The problem wasn't that you were uncomfortable in the proximity; it was that you were too comfortable, to the point that you never wanted to leave. But that would be a dead giveaway of your feelings, right?
"Okay, this is just painful to watch now," Nami sighed, jolting the two of you. You had nearly forgotten that she and Robin were right there, and they had seen everything. She looked at you unhappily, mouth set in a tight line. "How about you two get a room and make out there?"
"Nami!" You cried out. She really just gave away your crush like that?!
"Just be grateful I'm not demanding money to make up for what I just had to witness," she sniffed haughtily, swinging her legs back onto the chair and pulling down her sunglasses. "Seriously, you two, go talk shit out. Or else, knowing you, you will just be awkward around each other and that's gonna be even more painful to watch."
She wasn't totally wrong. You were planning to avoid him, possibly by jumping off the Sunny and drowning to death since you didn't know how to swim. But that wasn't really a solution and even you could admit that.
"W- What's there to talk-?" Sanji seemed a little scared, wide eyes glancing between the three of you. Nami ignored him, and you were too flustered to look him in the eyes. Nami's suggestion was essentially for you to come clean, wasn't it? But that was easier said than done. The fear of rejection and the eventual awkwardness was gripping your insides in a chokehold, and you couldn't move your feet even if you tried.
"Sanji," Robin said calmly. "Pick up (y/n) and go to the kitchen."
"Huh?" You were startled at her words. Pick you up?! No way! "No, no way, I'm too… I'm too heavy, there's no need for that!" Even as you said that, you couldn't actually bring yourself to move.
"I don't really get it," Sanji admitted, looking between the three of you as he spoke, "but I can do that. (Y/n)-chan?"
"No, Sanji–" the protests died down the moment he bent down and picked you up like you weighed nothing. Even as he walked you across the deck, you couldn't help but think that it was kind of hot just how easily he picked you up. "Sanji…"
He didn't look at you until you were in the kitchen and the door was closed behind the two of you. He walked over to the table and then carefully placed you on it, as if you were a teacup made of fine china teetering with tea. Finally, he let his clear blue eyes stare down at you, the expression on his face more vulnerable and exposed than you had ever seen on him.
"Sanji?"
"I know I made you uncomfortable," he said quietly, backing away. His hands came up to rub away the blood but it only made it spread around and you winced at seeing that. You never wanted to see any blood on Sanji, if you could help it. "I touched your… you. It wasn't my intention, I swear! I just, I wanted, I–"
He abruptly shut up, looking frustrated with himself.
"Sanji."
He didn't look up, fists clenching at his side the moment you said his name.
"Come here, Sanji," you whispered, holding out your hands to beckon him closer. His eyes flickered over your face, as if trying to gauge out what you were feeling, even as he followed through your request without a second thought. You pulled out the handkerchief he had given you long back, and wiped away the blood over his upper lip and cheeks carefully before you picked up his hand. The thumb was bloody too, so you gently held the limb in one of your hands and wiped it with the other. "You didn't make me uncomfortable, Sanji."
He stayed quiet as you continued to wipe it until it was all gone.
"Didn't I?" He said the moment you were done.
"No," you said, looking up at him. You didn't let go of the hand, though you dropped the handkerchief beside you. Somehow, holding his hand seemed to give you the courage to make the admission Nami had told you to. "I… Sanji, I like you. A lot more than I ever thought it was possible to feel towards someone. I like you so much that it physically hurts when I see you flirting with other women. I like you so much that my heart feels warm whenever you are around, and I feel so safe in your arms that I never want to leave. I like it when you are close to me. But I know that you don't like me like that, so whenever you get so close, and I can't help but want you so much, it's painful for me. I never want to let you go."
Sanji's eyes darkened with every word you spoke, a gradual change that you didn't notice at first because you were all in over your head. His hands hovered around your waist as you finished.
"Who told you?" His voice was a little hoarse, and he cleared his throat the moment he realised how desperate he sounded.
"Told me what?" You asked timidly, looking down at your lap.
"That I don't like you?" Sanji's voice was a broken whisper like yours had been. "I have never heard anything more untrue than that. All this time, I wanted you but I kept my feelings to myself. Because you deserve so much, so much more than I am, so much more than I can give. I wanted and I wanted and I felt so greedy, wanting more and more of you, more than you would let me have– I wanted anything you were ready to give, and I also wanted everything you have to give. I thought you wouldn't want someone like me, when there are so many better options around for you–"
"What?" You couldn't help but laugh. All his words were making you delirious; this had to be some wild dream you had conjured up. It didn't feel real. None of it did. "I had better options around? Sanji, I was so sure you would never look twice at me! I never felt like I was pretty enough, or good enough to get your attention and you're telling me… I had better options? That's so–"
You kept laughing, body shaking from the weight of the laughter. Sanji stared at you, unsure hands still hovering around you. His fingers twitched from holding back the urge to pull you into him.
"You are the prettiest girl I have ever seen," he mumbled. "Not good enough to get my attention? Darling, you have had all of my attention ever since I met you. No other woman could compare to you from the moment you made your place in my heart known."
"Did I really have all your attention?" You asked, letting your insecurities bubble up. Now that you were both being honest, it was better to get it all out of the way, right? "Even when you looked at the other women…"
"I never looked at them the way I did you," his words were sincere, and in that moment, they were enough. You looked up at him, and your body broke into shivers the moment you realised the heat in his eyes as he stared down at you; like you were some unique dish he was finally getting the chance to eat after years of craving it.
"I didn't want the other options, Sanji," you whispered, the volume enough for the proximity you were in. "The only one I ever wanted was you."
You held his collars and pulled him in, and it was like he finally snapped, now that he had permission. His hands immediately grasped at your sides, gently holding the soft flesh there as he kissed you. And now it was your time to give and give, while he took from you like your lips were spilling with ambrosia and he was determined to get every drop. His warm breath fanned over your lips and the goosebumps on your skin rose again, your fingers tightening around the collars of his shirt.
When he let your lips go, he was greeted with the sight of your flushed and pleasantly buzzed expression, like you were drunk on him. Seeing you like that, because of him, it was enough to get him groaning.
"So beautiful," he whispered, leaving feather light kisses all over your face. "So gorgeous. All for me. All… for me to have?"
"Yeah," you whispered, looking up at him and seeing the devastated yet over-the-moon expression on Sanji's face. Even without words, he could always just cleave into your heart and press himself within its walls like they were made to fit him, and only him. "You can be greedy. Take all you want. I'm all yours."
°•❀•°
2K notes · View notes
buckyalpine · 9 months
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Cheating!Steve x reader, Bucky x reader
Oh look, more cheating Steve with sweetheart Bucky to save us
A/N: Last year someone asked me for some mad angsty fic and I posted and deleted it so quick because it was god awful. Just awful. However, I had kept a draft of it cause even though I hated it and everything about it, I didn't want it gone forever. Upon rereading it recently...I kinda like it. So I decided to change some stuff (like most of the entire plot), switch around characters (I'm a Bucky girl) and repost. If you want to see the OG fic, I can post it again or just edit this to add it under the new version
Steve couldn't stand seeing you like this. In the hospital room, the needles prodding you, it all reminds him of hydra and the things he had seen on numerous missions. When you almost die, he's thrown back into the spiral where he has no hope for a future. And nothing changes after you get better. You had almost died once. Missions were getting riskier and you weren't always in the clear. In his mind, everything good in his life leaves him or gets ripped away eventually. Peggy was a prime example of that. It's just a matter of time.
Even in your injured state, your attention was all on Steve. You knew how much he hated seeing you hurt. It sent him into a dark place few people had witnessed. As soon as your eyes fluttered open, your tired eyes met his red rimmed, puffy ones. For days, every time you try to bring him back to you, he has his walls built up again.
He won't let himself love you more.
He drinks.
He drinks enough to get drunk. It takes bottle after bottles but he doesn't care. He doesn't care about anything any more. So much so, he decides to seek the warmth of someone else.
Because you almost left him.
You could die so easily.
You almost did.
Nothing matters any more. His moans of pleasure are empty but he's wrapped around her none the less. He doesn't stop until his body can't move, too exhausted to even think about guilt.
-
You have it all planned out. You were finally released from the hospital and the first thing you wanted to do was spend time with Steve. The team had left the compound so you could set up a movie night for you and the captain, you don't want to let him slip from your grasp, not after all you'd been through together. You didn't go through hell and back to lose him like this. You fought for your life to pull through.
There are snacks laid out on the table, a movie pulled up, some hot chocolate made just for you and him. You shuffle nervously, your heart beating erratically. You didn't spend 4 years with him just for this to end because you nearly died. No. He was worth the fight. His cold demeanor was not towards you but towards the fear of losing you. And that fear was from love. Love you both shared deeply for each other.
You knew he got back from the bar late; if he was too drunk then you'd help him to his room and talk to him in the morning. It was a new habit of his but you understood.
Except he never came. He always made it home. Not tonight.
Steve stumbled in the next morning, rubbing his eyes, seeing a small sleeping form on the sofa, snacks and some drinks laid out in the living room. He swallowed thickly when he sees you get up from the couch wearing one of his hold hoodies, making your way towards him.
"Steve?"
You have a soft smile on your face, but it drops when you get a closer look at him. Tears prickle at your eyes when you see the way his neck is littered in bruises, his skin still flushed. He can't look you in the eyes, not after what he'd just done.
"I-
You freeze before him, you don't want to ask. You don't want to know. The broken expression his face is enough for you. You wordlessly leave the living room, locking yourself in, giving FRIDAY instructions to make sure no one can enter.
"Did you talk to y/n" Bucky asks excitedly when he sees Steve sitting in the living room. He knows how excited you were about the movie night, spending days planning every last detail. His excitement drops when he sees the food untouched and you're nowhere to be seen. "Where is she?"
Steve remains silent, staring at his hands. The rest of the team enter the living room, hoping to find you both curled on the couch, but no. Nat's eyes narrow when she sees the hickeys on Steve's neck but something tells her they're not from you, you've never marked him like that before, you've always been so gentle with him.
"How could you?" She hissed, while the rest of the team look at her in confusion. It doesn't take long for them to piece things together. And it's a mess.
You come down to the living room, both Sam and Tony holding Bucky down on the couch while he glares at Steve, his hands still in fists. They all turn towards you with broken eyes, this is not what they ever wanted for you. The second he sees you, he breaks down. You're numb to his cries, his pleas.
He finds you leaving the compound at 1:00 AM from where he's still seated on the couch, something you'd never done before.
"Baby? Where are you going"
You ignore him, making your way to the garage. You were never able to sleep since and staying in bed only left you alone with your thoughts.
"I-I need some space. Don't worry about where I'm going"
"Y/n, please, just let me explain"
"No"
"I made a mistake, I-
"I don't care. I just want need some air"
"Promise me you'll come back?"
You shake your head, you can't even look at Steve. You scoff, shoving past him, not caring when he hisses in pain. His cheek is bruised, spots of dark purple and blue bloom around his eye and you'd seen Nat icing Bucky's hand earlier.
"Y/n, please angel, I-I just want to talk, just promise me you'll come back?"
"I promise" You reluctantly mumble, hopping on your motor bike and speeding off before Steve can call after you again.
You loved him so much.
You fought so hard to pull through for him, you heard every word he'd said to you when you were unconscious.
Tears clouded your vision.
It all happens too fast for you to comprehend.
The car doesn't see you.
The bend is sharp.
You bike is sent over the edge.
Darkness.
-
It's been a week.
You still haven't woken up.
It's all his fault. It doesn't matter that the driver was intoxicated. It didn't matter that it was dark out. You wouldn't have left the compound if he hadn't done what he did and it eats him alive.
He's not met with any sympathy.
No one bats an eye at his tears or sobs, too concerned about your well being to go and comfort him. Like clock work, every member of the team visits on rotation since they can't all be there at once. however Bucky is exempt from all hospital rules with one brooding, grumpy stare.
Bucky is by your side every single day. He doesn't say anything when Steve grips your hand, praying for you to wake up, silently praying himself while your heart monitor continues to beep. Steve refuses to move from your side but he's not given much of a choice when Fury summons him personally for someone mission related.
He's only gone for a few hours but that's when you finally stir. Bucky is on his feet instantly, paging for the doctor while stroking your hair.
"Hey pretty girl" Bucky whispers when your eyes finally focus, the knuckles of his metal hand gently caressing your cheek. The cool sensation helps you feel more alert. You smile seeing his baby blue eyes, feeling safe as he talks to you softly.
-
Everything hits Steve all at once. He didn't just betray you. He betrayed the team. His bestfriend. Himself. All the people who had faith in him to make the right choice, to do the right thing, to protect them. And he threw it away. Everyone waited a month for you to fully recover before throwing a welcome back party so you'd actually be able to enjoy it. Steve looked back longingly at the happy group gathered together in the living room, more emotions hitting him again.
He was happy you were alive. His sweet, sweet girl pulled through. H
He was envious of the love everyone was sharing, one he wasn't privy to anymore. He was invited, he was still apart of the team after all but he knew it wasn't his place.
He was jealous.
Jealous of the way you melted into Bucky's side. Longing to feel that warmth that he used to feel himself. Bucky had his arm around your waist, keeping you tucked right by him, taking care of you long after you were discharged. He wasn't going to stop any time soon.
There was something between you two, everyone could sense it. The soft gazes at each other and innocent kisses. Bucky wouldn't let a day go by without pressing his lips to your cheek, your nose, your forehead, the top of your head. He needed you to know you were loved and cared for. He stuck to his guns, claiming his actions were purely platonic but the pink blush on his cheeks proved that he was a bald faced liar.
-
Steve knows theres no one to blame but himself. He sighs and swallows the lump in his throat as you stand on your tiptoes to kiss the brunette, sealing you both together forever. He's always thought it would be the two of you standing together at the alter but how things had changed. The cheers of the crowd are a dull buzz to him. He watches Bucky swoop in for another kiss, this time dipping you and capturing your lips sweetly.
"I love you Mrs. Barnes"
"I love you more, Mr. Barnes"
Your happy, love struck giggles cause the first tear to fall.
He does his best to smile when you both walk by, flashes of what your wedding would have looked like. The white dress. The veil. The flowers.
if only he never-
But it was too late.
2K notes · View notes
luveline · 10 months
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𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 | 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐨’𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚
miguel does everything he can to make you feel better after a civilian casualty steals your ‘sunshine’. —a fic featuring reluctantly adoring miguel and his sad spider-girl. pre across the spider-verse but contains spoilers. requested here. fem!reader, 4k
cw character death, violence, reactive depression
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
"Miguel," you say, your voice grained by the communicator in his ear, "this universe is almost the same as mine, right?" 
Miguel stares down at a Doc Ock variant you're staking out, lying in wait for the anomalistic antagonist to make his first move. He's trying desperately to maintain his focus but you have a nice voice, and you ask him with a confidence that betrays your total faith in him. You haven't considered that he might not know. 
Well, Miguel does know. He's not sure he should start this discussion and distract you, but he has trouble saying no to you in any capacity, so he does. 
"I don't know every difference, but yeah, they're the same. Same geography, world leaders, roughly the same fast food chains." He bites his lip. He's at work, more than work —you're attempting to save an entire dimension, here— and he shouldn't feed the conversation anymore. But he knows you'll be interested in this. "Donuts aren't a thing, here."
"What?" 
"They have donuts, but they aren't called donuts, and they're nowhere near as popular." 
"This is a very strange way to flirt," Lyla says, her flickering hazed by a golden aura as she changes rapidly between laying on her front, legs kicking, and her back, as though she's in a therapist's daybed. She floats across his vision lazily.
"That's because I'm not," Miguel says. 
"What?" you ask.
"Nothing. Talking to Lyla." 
"How come Lyla doesn't talk to me?" you ask sweetly.
Miguel can see you in the distance, your simple black suit like an ink splodge against the blue grey glass of the skyscraper you're standing on. Anchored with a web and your body tensed, you're perfectly parallel to the ground below, as though you're standing on the windows. 
"It's not that I don't want to," Lyla promises. "Miggy won't let me." 
"That is not true." 
Projections cover Miguel's vision, powered by his favourite lying intelligence. Movements are mapped in a bright marigold yellow, though the net turns red to signify potential danger, chance percentages bouncing up and down. Doc Ock raises an arm and it turns an eye-straining red. He sits down on a park bench and his body turns yellow again. It's a smart program, but it can't account for everything. 
"Something isn't right." 
You hum appreciatively. "It feels weird, how he's acting. Like he's two separate people." 
Doc Ock glitches hard, the air around him fractured by colours in varying depths, like a tangible, physical screen tone. They've been coming faster. He doesn't have much time before he begins to tear apart, and that tearing will prompt panic. Panic will prompt anger. 
"What should we do?" you ask. 
Miguel doesn't know. He regrets asking you to come with him, not that you aren't capable. When you first joined the Spider Society you'd hadn't been Spider-Girl in your own universe for very long, and you weren't particularly proactive. You were kind-hearted but lackadaisical, and after worming your way into his life, a flower budding between concrete slabs it shouldn't have the power to crack, (he seriously doesn't know how it happened, only that you'd been bringing him things, carefully wrapped foods and trinkets you'd made, your bad conversation, and suddenly you were worrying about him and doting on him in the strange way that you do, suddenly, he was doing the same), you decided you wanted to help. You've trained hard on Spider-led courses at the Society, improving your overall fitness, your stamina, your technique, to become the fighter you are now. You can hold your own well. 
Miguel knows what motivated you. You want to look after him. You'd all but admitted to it. And that's why Miguel wishes he asked someone else to come with him, because you'll put yourself in harm's way as he would for you, to protect. 
"Why did you want to know if this universe was the same?" he asks, the nano of his suit morphing over his hands, claws growing long and minaciously sharp.
"Oh! Because, I used to have these favourite cookies called Butter Leaves, but they stopped making them in my dimension 'cos of the Whey disease. Even when it was better, loads of companies couldn't come back…" 
You give him the entire history. He already knows it. He tries to listen to you with the attention you deserve anyway, only he's weighed the options, and taking down Doc Ock feels much more important than listening to your cravings. 
"They were really thin and they had this sweet coating brushed over the top. You'd like them, I think." Miguel drops the last hundred feet to the ground, ignoring the jarring heat in his ankles at such a landing without having rolled into it. "If they were a little softer and had some sugar they'd taste just like polvorones, Miguel."
"You could say that about lots of things," Miguel argues, tone measured as not to alert bystanders nearby of his presence. 
"This doesn't feel like a good idea," Lyla says. Standing now, alert. 
Miguel toggles the communicator so you can't hear him. 
He wonders if you'd even notice him speaking over the intensity of your excitement, "I know it's not professional but maybe we could go and look? After we beat the bad guy. They're more than worth it, I swear," you say hopefully. 
"It's fine," he says to Lyla, throwing out a hand, shins braced and ready to burst into a tackle. 
"It feels off, you both said it." 
"It always feels off. He's in the wrong dimension, his presence caused a shift. The wrongness is unavoidable, like the body–" 
"Rejecting an organ transplant," Lyla says. "I know. You say it constantly." 
"If you know, why are you asking?" he asks, deadpan. 
"Good to know your girlfriend can ask questions and I can't. You're a trailblazer for equality, O'Hara."
Not my girlfriend, he thinks, but he isn't sure how true that is. Miguel realigns his eyesight, the holographic netting that pinpoints anomalistic stress a menacing red where it maps Doc Ock's limbs. The colours are abrasive against the yellow-green leaves fluttering in the breeze to the grass below, trees like arms stretched toward one another standing behind the simple brown bench where Doc Ock murmurs drunken-sounding ravings. 
Miguel's fangs slice through gum and lock into place. He tries not to salivate. The paralysing agent produced gives him a numb tongue. 
Miguel attempts to work quickly. Approach the target. Lock the target in. Incapacitate. He rears back and takes a deep breath. 
"Wait! Behind! Behind you, Miguel, there's something behind you!" 
He twists backward without hesitation and swings his arm around a cold neck. He squeezes hard, hears a metallic crunch similar to a mortar and pestle, but the person in his chokehold isn't a person, it's a robot. 
"Octobots!" Lyla shouts. 
"HELPFUL!" Miguel shouts back, grunting as a robotic arm curves around his back, and then a second, a third. 
The hills of his muscles strain against white-lacquered steel, a sweat breaking at the back of his neck as he groans, desperate to stop the octobot from crushing his arms to a powder. He can practically hear the creaking of his humerus. 
Around him, civilians scatter, screaming for their lives as a small horde of octobots descends on the park. Doc Ock doesn't react to the chaos. He sits there muttering to himself as people run past him and his octobots play cat and mouse. Miguel finally snaps the arms off the robot holding him with a pissed grunt, punching the carcass of machinery away from him while you tuck and roll from a dive to the ground. In an impressive show of your improvement and coordination, you throw out a web as you roll and hit Doc Ock square in the face, a second binding his chest to the bench. You spring to your feet, shooting at bots one after another. You must take down six by the time he's gathered his bearings. 
"On your left," Lyla says. Miguel smashes a bot at the apex of its white body and she laughs. "Nice. Behind." 
Miguel falls into the fight as though it's a well-practised dance. With the stress maps locked on, quick-thinking, and Lyla's pointed direction, Miguel can decapitate or incapacitate each bot swiftly as long as they don't get a hold on him like the first one managed. 
You're like Lyla in that a good skirmish seems to set you off —you're giggling, cheering, enjoying yourself much more than you should be. "This is just like that video game," you say, leaping onto a moving octobot and shooting webbing at the joints, gumming them up until they can't move. "With the girl and her super powered puppy, you know that one?" 
"Of course I don't know that one." Miguel brings his claws down into the aluminium shell of an octobot as it swipes your legs from under you and tears it in two. It cracks like a halved apple, the gore of its inside sparking and smoking as it hits the ground in tandem with you. Your head whacks hard into the concrete pathing beneath. He doesn't have time to help you. 
The arm of a bot races forward like a stinger. This one must be the head of the hive, the Queen bee so to speak, far more complicated than the others in the plating of her ivory bodice and chain-mail like shielding on her arms.
Miguel swears under his breath and vaults at it. 
He pulls your droid feed up in his display, watches you writhe from one side and the other as your pained moans play in his ear. You clamber onto wobbly footing as Miguel descends, the screeching cry of metal while it's shorn apart beneath his hands not half as loud as your useless gasping —you're winded, likely concussed. 
"Civilian entering range," Lyla says. 
"What? Where?" 
Lyla has your drone's camera spin on the spot to show Miguel the civilian stupid enough to enter an active fight zone. They aren't stupid at all, it figures, but unaware. A man in activewear jogs the beaten path with headphones in, eyes to the ground. He stops for a moment to look at his sports watch, and like the octobot can tell, it shakes Miguel like a bothersome flea and surges for him. 
You're closest. 
"Y/N!" Miguel shouts, knowing it's too late before he so much as closes his mouth. You turn, your head braced in your hand, breathing hard with pain. Miguel would take it back if he could. 
You can't save the civilian, but you can watch him die. 
People look at him like he's a ghost, sometimes. Wide-eyed, horrified, they move aside in the halls. They treat him how he feels on his worst days, like someone who should've died a long time ago. Today, things are different. 
No less than three Peter Parker' have stopped to stare at him unabashedly. Nearly all make the same jokes, Late for a date?
He'd honestly prefer feeling like a ghost. He can't deal with their derision and he doesn't want to, ignoring their looks and their judgement as he treks to the elevator that's gonna drop him outside of the medbay. The only person he wouldn't mind poking fun at him is you. 
You aren't in the mood. 
Miguel doesn't acknowledge your prone form at first. He walks to your bedside table to deposit the bouquet he'd chosen, peonies for good health and strength, swapping old for new, changing the water in your small shared sink. He may orchestrate the Spider Society, but Miguel's special privileges can't reduce the extreme turnover rate of the medbay. You have curtains to partition the room for privacy, and you got the bed by the window, and that's as much as he could get you. You deserve better. 
Miguel opens the window to drown out the smell of antiseptic. He stands in front of it, his shadow stretching over your twisted hip. You're not sleeping, you're resting. Doctor's orders.
Miguel wishes you'd deign to rest in your own bed, or his, but you're a little too catatonic for a safe discharge either way. 
He sighs quietly. You likely hear it with your enhanced senses and still you remain an impassive lump under your blue hospital blanket. 
"Good morning," he says, instead of the thousand other things he wants to say, that he's too much of a coward to ask. "Let's get up." 
He doesn't give you any choice about it. Starting slow, Miguel rounds the bed to meet your eyes through your sluggish blinking. Perhaps you'd been more asleep than he thought. 
Gentle, Miguel peels down your blankets enough to push his hands under your armpits. He pulls you up into a sitting position, and it —it breaks his heart. He's a monolith, he's hurting, he has years and years of loss and grief behind him and it doesn't matter, it finds him again. His heart breaks at your limblessness and your willingness to be positioned like a paper doll. 
Miguel arranges the sad pillow behind you and puts the remote for the adjustable bed frame in your hand. The last time you'd been here in the medbay after a training exercise fractured your ulna, you'd spent pretty much the entire time messing around with your bed, even as they crafted your cast. It made for messy work. Miguel must've told you to quit it fifty times. 
Your fingers curl around the remote. 
Miguel perches on the mattress on one knee to fix the protective style your hair is in. Nothing serious, just smoothing the tiniest of stray hairs and making sure it's still comfortable. He strokes your temple absentmindedly, checking you over one feature at a time. Tired eyes, nose tip looking parched, your lips chapped. Frowning, he sits properly, and he pulls your big hospital bag from the bedside table, his hand falling to your wrist to say, Hey, I'm here, and I'm not going far.
He finds your smaller bag of toiletries and necessities and unzips it. He tries not to think about the last time he had to take care of someone like this as he cleans your face with a wet wipe, two fingers wrapped in the wipe and petting at your skin carefully. He notices the life returning to you inchingly, his touch a tether you're pulling on, so he prolongs his actions. He smooths moisturiser over your face extra slowly. If you asked why, he could say it's cold, but you don't ask.
Your face shiny in the sunshine filtering in through the wide windows, you almost look like yourself again. 
"Are you hungry?" 
You shake your head. An almost imperceptible gesture. 
"This is why you don't feel well," he says. "You're not eating enough." 
"That's not why," you say.
He aches to hear your voice. I know, he thinks, but doesn't say. 
"Eat something," he says. 
You shake your head again. He managed to bring you back and squash you back down in less than a minute. He really doesn't like himself, at that moment. Often, but especially now. He's failing you. He failed you with the octobots and he's failing you now. 
Miguel refuses to fail someone he cares about again. 
He takes the remote for your bed and lifts the top section so you can sit back comfortably. He shakes the blankets out over you, and he puts away your things. Hopeful, Miguel places new pyjamas and underwear with your shower caddy at the end of the bed and pulls a strict pose, hands crossed over his chest. 
"I need to go. Shower, eat breakfast when it comes. Please." 
You give him a look that might mean Yes but probably doesn't mean anything, laying down as much as the bed allows and turning your face from him toward the flowers. Miguel leaves, stopping a ways away to look back, and watches through the gap of your curtains as you reach out to touch the flowers he'd brought. Your pinky finger is less than an inch from the petals when your movement stutters, your hand falling back to your chest with a soft thud. You close your eyes. 
When Miguel returns, he's thankful to find you've done as he told you. Showered, changed, a discarded breakfast tray at your feet. You've attempted the oatmeal and left the toast to go cold, congealed butter white against golden yellow. 
Miguel swaps the tray for his bags. He's hoping you might be tempted to look while he's gone. He knows before you would've known the entire contents of the open bag by the time he'd left the room, but he returns having taken your tray to the rack and is sorely disappointed. 
That's fine, he decides. You don't have to look. He doesn't mind laying things out for you. 
First port of call: extra pillows. He pulls the plastic wrapped 'hotel pillows' up onto your sheet and tears the plastic. They pop out. He didn't think for pillow cases, so he slides them behind your hospital pillow and pushes you down by the shoulders, not cruel but not particularly gentle —you actually laugh at his handling. He bites back a smile. 
"What, you got me presents?" you ask as he dumps a blanket onto your lap. It's one of those soft, shiny fleece ones patterned with those characters you love so much, the girl and her super powered puppy. 
You rub your hands over it appreciatively and spread it out over your legs. "What's that mean?" he asks, pointing at the Chinese characters, '超級汪汪!'. 
"Chāojí wāngwāng!" you cheer, an impression missing the majority of your usual pep. "Super woof. It's his level five power up. He yaps and Joyce gets her HP back." 
Miguel pretends to know, like he'd forgotten, and you're reminding him. "Ah."
You're watching now, interested. He puts his back between you and the bag and you whine weakly, "Miguel." 
"What? You think these are for you?" 
"Please, I want to see." 
He gives in like a cheap tent, passing you a packet of pearly beads for your bracelet making, skeins of variegated thread that change colours, a packet of pencils with frogs on the lids, a plushie. You don't know how to react and Miguel doesn't know what to say. He honestly doesn't want to say anything, vulnerability stopped being his thing a while ago, but he clears his throat. "Do you know what I look like in the middle of Miniso? Picture it."
Miniso being a Chinese home goods store lined floor to ceiling with plushies.
You laugh weirdly. Miguel knows it's guilt holding you back. 
"One last thing." He sits down on the bed next to you, hands big enough to cover the box in its entirety. "You were wrong, by the way. Extremely wrong, these don't taste a thing like polvorones." 
He passes you the box. You take it into steady hands, smiling widely, your thumb brushing up against the black cursive font. A box of butter leaves from one of your sister dimensions.
"I don't know if they'll taste like they did. Are they the same ones?" 
You nod, loosing a breath between parted lips. "Same ones." 
"If you don't eat them all, I won't get them for you again." 
"That's so mean," you murmur. Miguel would apologise if he thought you meant it. 
"That's how it is. Eat your cookies. I'll come back later to make sure you actually ate dinner." 
He stands. You immediately grab him, cookies dropped in favour of braceleting his wrist in your warm fingers. 
You look up at him through your lashes, a frown dampening your pretty features. At least, in his eyes. 
"Please don't go," you say. Your eyebrows pinch together. It's even more heartbreaking than your catatonia, this pleading loneliness, like you think he won't stay. 
"You have to talk to me," Miguel says. He softens at your chastised wince, sitting back down again. "Did you want a hug?" he asks. 
It's an apology to offer it, though he should've asked you this morning, or yesterday, even the day before. You'd been inconsolable when it happened. Miguel's never seen you that way. Your sunshine shattered, your shoulders shaking under his hands as he led you away from the scene, he didn't hug you like he wanted to. It wouldn't have made a difference at the time. You couldn't speak. You could barely walk. 
Seeing something like that happen leaves a mark, even if you've seen it before. 
You sweep aside your gifts and twist your legs to climb onto your knees. Miguel hadn't realised how much you wanted to be close to him until you're bordering his lap, your arms sliding over his shoulders, your pyjamas soft and smelling of antiseptic under his nose. A switch flicks at your nearness. He pulls you into his lap and sandwiches you there, chest to chest, thankful for his stature because it means he can encapsulate you effortlessly. He can hide you from the world for a short while. 
You choke him half to death. 
"It's okay," he says, your back curved into the length of his forearm, leaning forward so you can take the weight off. "You're okay." 
"I don't– it's not me. I'm not worried about me." 
"It's over," he says. "What's done is done." Which isn't to say it isn't tragic, or that it didn't leave a permanent mark on the world. But you're punishing yourself for a crime you didn't commit.
"It's all my fault," you whisper, your cheek pressing to his shoulder, face hidden in the juncture of his neck.
He tilts his head toward you. "It's my fault. I jumped in. I wanted it to be quick."
"I let him…" 
"You had a grade ii concussion, you didn't let anyone do anything. I'm lucky you didn't pass out right there. I'm lucky you had the ability to defend yourself, because I left you defenceless." 
"No, you didn't, it–" You rub your cheek against his shoulder. "It happened really fast, you were making sure that bot didn't get me because I was stupid enough to leave myself open–" 
"Stop it."
It's harsh enough to stop you in your tracks. Miguel sighs hard, hair blowing away from his face. 
He lays down backward, skewiff on your bed, and pulls you with him in a secure but gentle hold. You make a quiet 'oof' as you go down. Apologetic yet again, Miguel rubs a line up and down your back, fingertips between your shoulders, palm flattening as he reaches the small of your back, your shirt inching up. He's sure you look foolish to anyone watching, but for once, he's past embarrassment. 
"I don't want to hear you blaming yourself. It's not your fault." 
You've twisted on your side on the mattress rather than crush his pelvis, though your chest remains pressed to his. You twist a strand of his dark hair around your finger. "Why did you bring me all this stuff?" you ask softly. 
"To make you feel better." 
"But why… do you… want that? Why does it matter that much, that you'd waste time going to get me things?" 
"Why do you think?" he asks. 
Your lips ghost the column of his throat. "Mm… 'cos you're nicer than you let on." 
"Wrong." 
You laugh again. He's more grateful than he'd ever say aloud. 
"Because you care about me too much." 
Too much is right. He feels like he's at the stern of the universe's most important ship. The universes, plural. That ship is heading square for an iceberg, for the precipice of a gargantuan whirlpool, and there's nothing Miguel can do but hand out buckets and veer sharply to the left, hoping it will be enough, knowing deep down that it won't be if something doesn't give soon. And he's lived a life, two lives, before he even met you. He's tired. He doesn't want to lose anyone else, and he hoped he could do that by never caring again. 
What a stupid hope. 
"I just want you to feel like yourself again," he admits. 
"I really wanted to save him." 
"You can't save everyone." 
He knows better than most. 
"I know," you say, no tears left to cry, voice impossibly small. 
Miguel wraps his arms around you and doesn't let go for a long, long time. 
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
thank you so much for reading, I really really hope you enjoyed! please think about reblogging if you liked it, I appreciate it &lt;3
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scarlethexelove · 4 months
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How about a WandaNat fic where both are slightly dark and kidnap R. R isn't too worried about it though and soon grows to actually love both of them. Maybe something angsty with a happy ending 🙂
We'll Keep You Safe
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Pairing: WandaNat x Reader
Word Count: 1546
Warnings: Domestic violence, kidnapping, allusion to drugging, murder, I don't think there is much else.
Part 2 Save You
A/N: First I want to thank @abbyromanoff for the help on a bit of the story idea. I was struggling to come up with how they get to the point so thank you Abby. Hope this is what you wanted I'm not really sure how much I like this one myself but I hope you enjoy.
NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN
You run from your house. Your wife is screaming at you to come back but you don't, you just run to your neighbors house. They told you if you ever needed anything that you could come to them. So that is what you did. Tears streaming down your face, your right eyes almost swollen shut and a gash on your cheek. You cradle your right arm with your left pretty sure that your wrist is broken. 
This wasn’t the first time she hit you, but this was the worst. You said you would leave but every time you were about to she promised to change to never hit you again. All she did was give you broken promises. So this time you ran her anger being heard even as you got to the front door of your neighbors. 
You banged on the door with your left hand as you looked back, scared she would follow you. You kept knocking even as the door opened, startling you and almost hitting the woman at the door. “I-I’m sorry.” You stuttered out. 
The beautiful brunette looks at your concern and anger swirling in her eyes. “S-sh-she” you stutter more, not able to form words. “Help” your voice sounding so small, your legs giving out as pain starts to spread through your body. The adrenaline wears off making you feel the full force of your injuries. Wanda catches you in her arms slowly helping you to the ground and pulling you into her. 
“Natasha!” Wanda calls out to her wife. Natasha comes around the corner, as soon as she sees you there is fury in hers. Your face is buried in Wanda’s neck as you cry. Natasha tries to make her way past you both so that she can teach your wife a lesson but Wanda stops her. Instead Wanda passes you to her wife. Sharing a knowing look. Natasha cradles you in her arms and carries you into the living room sitting down with you on the couch. Burying yourself into her she holds you tightly as you cry continuously apologizing to her as you soak her shirt in your tears. 
Natasha shushes you as she rubs her hand up and down your back. Wanda making her way into the kitchen. A few minutes later as you start to calm down Wanda returns with a tray. A tea pot and some tea cups sit on the tray. She pours a cup for you. Natasha coxes you out of her neck as Wanda extends the cup of tea. You take it hesitantly and take a few sips. Both women give you a sad smile. 
“Honey, do you want to tell us what happened?” Wanda speaks gently as she sits down on the edge of the coffee table in front of you. You lightly nod your head before speaking. “I-I came home and Lila was pissed. S-she found the divorce papers I had hidden. I tried to tell her I wasn’t going to but she s-started hitting me. I-I ran here as soon as I could get away.” You tell the woman. “I’m scared.”
“We won’t let her hurt you again.” Natasha says. You can feel her anger but also her concern. You lay your head on her shoulder starting to feel sleepy and your body feeling numb. The pain fading away. Your body feels heavy as you try to speak again but no words come out. That is the last thing you remember before everything goes black. 
You blink your eyes open, your body feeling weak and heavy. It’s hard to keep your eyes open but you're able to look around. You are wearing different clothes which freaks you out. Did someone change you? What the hell happened? Why are you here? And where is Wanda and Natasha? All these questions run through your mind. Panic setting in.
You start to look around again. This room is not one you are familiar with. The walls are wooden and a few paintings scattered around. There is a bedside table next to the bed you are laying on. It is soft, softer than anything you have been on in a long time. One of your wifes punishments for a long time has been sleeping on the ground. You notice the water on the bedside table which makes you realize how thirsty you are. Your mouth feels as though you have cotton in it. So you reach out grabbing it, but as you bring it to yourself you drop the glass and it shatters on the ground. 
Just then the door swings open and you see a panicked Wanda with Natasha behind her. They both quickly rush towards you. “Are you ok? Did you hurt yourself?” Wanda questions quickly come up next to you grabbing your hands and looking you over to see if you have any new injuries. “Where am I? What are we doing here? Why am I wearing different clothes?” You send out a rapid array of questions to the woman.
Wanda gives you a soft look. “We brought you here.” She told you, placing a hand on your check which you flinch from before letting her touch you. “We had to get you away from her.” Natasha added as she bent down cleaning up the shattered glass. “H-her, y-you mean my wife?” You question starting to push Wanda away and scrabble out of the bed. She grips you tightly and doesn’t let you up. 
“Ow, Wanda you're hurting me.” You tell her as her grip loosens on your good wrist. That is when you realize that they have tended to your injuries and cleaned you up. “Sorry detka. We just want to keep you safe. We never want to hurt you. You deserve so much better than that woman can provide you. We just want to keep you safe and give you the love you deserve.” Wanda gently tells you, holding your hands in hers. You let yourself relax and stare at her. “She can never hurt you again.” Natasha adds sitting down next to you. 
You can’t help but admit that you have had a crush on the women since you met them, but you have a wife and they were married to each other. So you always push down those feelings, but sitting here with the woman feels just right. Natasha’s words echoing in your head which causes you to think. “What do you mean she will never hurt me again? You can’t know that. W-what if she finds me?” You quickly panic at the thought. 
“She won’t be a problem anymore Y/n I promise you that.” Natasha reassures you, but something still doesn’t sit right. “Did you hurt her?” You question the woman sitting next to you. You can see an evil glint in her eyes. “No one will ever hurt you again and no one will ever find her.” Natasha said, trying to lessen the blow to the fact that she inadvertently admitted to killing your wife. You should be scared and you should try and run from them. They did kidnap you and murder your wife but you can’t find it in yourself to do any of that. They seem to care so much about you and you wouldn’t be surprised if they actually love you. 
“I-I I don’t know what to say.” You stutter out. They have already done more for you and made you feel so safe in such a short amount of time. So you accept it. You accept that they have killed your wife and brought you somewhere to keep you safe. They have taken care of your injuries. Your wrist has been set, they cleaned your cheek. Your eye doesn’t seem to be as swollen anymore. They really care for you. 
“You don’t have to say anything Y/n we love you so much already and we just want to give you everything you deserve.” Wanda gently strokes the back of your hand with her thumb. Natasha leans in and kisses your forehead. “You mean the world to us detka.” Natasha adds. Tears spring into your eyes at their words. They do love you and they are gentle with you. A stark contrast to the life you have been living. So you let the rational part of you go and you listen to the warm feeling in your chest. Leaning your body into Natasha as she wraps her arms around you. 
You feel tired again, your body relaxing with the safety you feel for the first time in a long time. You can’t remember the last time you felt like this. As you relax into Natasha she starts to guide you to lay down. She shuffles you and herself back on the bed pulling your body fully into hers. Wanda slides in behind you and wraps her arms around your waist as she gently kisses your shoulder. 
“We have you sweet girl and we promise to never hurt you.” Natasha kisses the top of your head. Your tired eyes closing as you nuzzle into her chest. You can get used to this. Living safe and sound with two women who love and care for you. “I love you.” You whisper as you drift off into a deep sleep. 
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tomriddleslove · 3 months
Text
Pt 2 - The one that you want.
✩Theodore Nott x Reader
Pt 2 to Hey, trouble (DELETED)
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Summary: The one where just as things are beginning to look up, everything comes crashing down. Alternatively: Tension, Fluff, Angst.
A/N: This fic was written very sleep deprived so I ask you to bear with me. The second part is my favourite so just stick with it.
Songs: The Way - Mac Miller, Ariana Grande
Lover, you should have come over - Jeff Buckley
Promise - Laufey
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NOTE: I accidentally deleted my account and did not have the first part of this mini series saved! I will probably rewrite it but there is some context you should know, so i’ll try summarise it as concisely as possible:
You and Theodore used to be really good friends when you first joined Hogwarts. Naturally, as you both got older, you changed slightly. Theodore came back one summer and he seemed completely different, he was not only incredibly handsome but he had generally flourished as a person. The girls all loved him and he found a new set of friends, essentially forgetting about you. Time skip a few years and you become friends with Pansy, and the rest of the group. Theodore greets you as though nothing has changed. You habour a lot of resentment to him initially, but realise you really do love chilling with the group and so you set it to the side. In the fic, you’re at a party and you head up to the roof. Theodore appears and you chat for the first time in ages. It gets a bit tense when you subtly call him out but you try brush it off as a joke. He noticed you at their quidditch practice earlier on in the day with mattheos number painted on your face, and he sounds a bit jealous. You assure him it was only for jokes, though you’re confused as to why he’d be upset. Theodore (internally ) alludes to loving you and you’re both emotionally stunted idiots in love.
AND that brings us back to now. Enjoy xx
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Friday had finally come, and you couldn't think of a word that could place just how relieved you were feeling. Don't get it wrong, you hugely valued your education, and took pride in working hard, but at the end of the day, there's only so much history of magic one could tolerate before their brain tuned out. The surprise quiz you took in class today told you that you had reached that point many months ago. But it was ok, that was an issue for the future.
You click open the door to your dorm room, tossing your bag haphazardly to the side as you undo your tie, pulling it loose with a groan of relief. Pansy is sprawled out comfortably on your bed because apparently, yours was comfier (they were the exact same thing, she just couldn't be bothered to make hers in the morning.)
You flick a strand of hair that fell in front of your face with a dramatic sigh as you flop down onto the bed, lying perpendicular to Pansy as you rest your head on her lap. She has a half smile of amusement as her hand comes down to pat your head, eyes trained on her book. You raise a brow and shuffle up slightly to catch a glimpse of what she was reading.
You see the word ‘shaft’ once and that's all you need to see as you gasp with fake indignation.
“Pansy… Whilst I'm sitting here?” You groan and she grins, her face slightly red as she shrugs, shameless.
I mean, come on. You weren't a stranger to smut, but right in front of you? You grab the book from her hand and toss it across the room.
“None of that whilst I'm here. Your amazing and beautiful friend is vying for attention so focus on me.’ You say and she playfully rolls her eyes as she lies back on her bed.
“It's disgustingly hot. I can't be bothered for this year anymore. The days are as hot as hell depths and the evening has me freezing my nonexistent balls off.” Pansy moans, and you hum in agreement.
You’re grateful for your friend and her seemingly never-ending talent of speaking because you currently couldn't even muster the energy to speak.
“Do we have to go watch the boys today? Lila told me Madam Pince has charmed the library with a cooling spell. We could go there instead.” Pansy says, sitting up, and the idea is incredibly tempting. You live for nothing more than to get out of this dastardly heat, especially in the comfort of the library (Pansy and yourself had mastered the art of smuggling snacks in. The key was in making sure you triple-checked what you bought in, which you learnt after Pansy had accidentally sat on a Fizzlebees Exploding Sherbet last winter. The poor 1st year who had sat next to you was sure that there was some kind of attack and leapt under the nearest table.)
The mention of practice has your mind thinking back to your most recent encounter with Theodore. Just thinking about it again elicited that strange feeling in your stomach. You were, perhaps, close to a path of redemption (though it was more Theodore redeeming himself.)
With a sigh, you shake your head.
“We promised them we'd come. Besides, imagine the absolute havoc Mattheo will cause when he finds out we ditched for the library of all places. He would get us banned for a month, at the very least.” You say, and Pansy grumbles but ultimately knows you’re right. She sighs, muttering.
“Yes yes, I suppose you're right.” She begrudgingly admits and you grin, sitting up. You walk over to your closet, looking for something else to wear as you felt as though you were positively melting in your uniform. You flick through your closet, cursing the endless void that conveniently was full of sweaters and thick jumpers now summer has come. You dig around and find a pair of black denim shorts towards the back. You don't even know when you got them, but they fit and they'll do the job. You're thankful for the fact that you love the feeling of freshly shaven legs on your bedsheets, because heaven knows you would not bother to shave your legs for a man. You manage to find a green shirt, and you slip it on. It's nothing special really, but you weren't dressing up for anyone. You were long past those days now, you found that it was lovely not giving two shits. Pansy called it alarming, but you liked to think of it as… eclectic.
Pansy brings over her signature red lipstick (which you're sure only she can pull off) and holds your cheek in place to draw a number 10 on it, as standard practice. You reach up to grab her hand.
“Wait. Do 7 instead.” You say. She widens her eyes slightly and wiggles her brows as she looks at you.
“Oh? And why is that?” She probes and you playfully swat her, rolling your eyes.
“Theodore just asked me to. Besides we shouldn't inflate Mattheo's ego too much.” You respond a bit too quickly, and she has a shit-eating grin on her face. Pansy knows you well though, and she knows probing any further will only give her a stinging hex and nothing more, so she simply looks at you with a pointed look as she draws the 7 on instead. You watch as she traces the number 7 on her face too, adjusting her hair as she pouts and blows a kiss at herself in the mirror. You pointedly roll your eyes to tease her and she throws a pillow at you.
“Alright alright, you humble lady. Let's go.” You muse, holding your arm out. The two of you link arms as you descend down to the quidditch pitch. The sun is shining blazing down on you, and you feel uncomfortably hot and sticky within a few seconds of being outside. You truly weren't built for warm weather.
The grass on the pitch is a beautiful rich green and the sky is so picturesquely blue that it seems more like a postcard as opposed to real life. You imagine that this must be their favourite season; you had entertained the idea of watching one match in the winter season and immediately stopped after a gust of wind sent a bird flying into the girl sitting above you (You were sure it had given her that scratch on her cheek.) You couldn't cope with watching a match in such harsh weather, and you couldn't even begin to imagine how it must be to play in such conditions.
Idiots, really. They brought it on themselves. They definitely came to that realisation when they would be dragged out of bed at 5:00 am to go play in the freezing cold whilst you remained blissfully asleep under your warm covers.
You clamber up the stairs of the stands and curse under your breath. For all the beauty and wonders the wizarding world had, was it really that damn hard to have a few escalators here and there? You wanted to watch a practice game, not train to have the thighs of Hercules. You finally reach the top and shimmy down the benches with Pansy, leaning against the railing, The team was already up in the air, circling around whilst tossing the ball to one another. For all the grace and elegance Draco exuded on the ground, you couldn’t help but snicker when you catch the sight of him looking like he had slathered himself in red paint, all sweaty and grimacing; strands of his blonde hair clinging to his face.
“You alright up there Draco? Mummy forget to send you some sun cream?” You call out teasingly, and he sneers at you as Mattheo cackles, swooping down on his broom to greet you and Pansy.
“There they are!” Blaise says, a small grin on his face as he flies down to your level, joining Mattheo. You don’t even have the time to greet him because a loud gasp escapes Mattheo's lips, his hand coming out to grip your chin, tilting your face to the side.
“Traitors!” Mattheo says, eyes flickering between Pansy and yourself. You can't keep the grin off your face as you pry your face out of Mattheo's hands.
“Oh come on Mattheo. We love you all equally and need to express that love as such.” Pansy drawls, a taunting grin on her face.
“Fuck off, I'm the only important one,” Mattheo responds, puffing out his chest as he points to himself.
Blaise has to hold back from rolling his eyes, looking over at you exasperatedly. You exchange a glance with him and you feel your lips curl up into a small smile as you stifle a laugh.
“This was your doing! What did you do to them? Now I'm going to play like shit!” Mattheo whines, as he turns to look up at Theodore.
Theodore.
Your eyes flicker up and sure enough there he is. And god, how dare he look so good in this disgusting heat. His eyes are (and you have the feeling they were like that for quite a bit) trained on you, an unreadable expression on his face. He keeps his gaze on you, and you're sure at that moment he was trying to seduce your soul or play some stupid kind of mind tricks on you to have you thinking of him all day (it was working.)
His lips curl up into that godforsaken smile that borders on a smug little smirk. It has you embarrassingly weak in the knees and suddenly you're very glad it's hot, for you could blame your red cheeks on the heat. He flies down, tearing his gaze away from you as he comes close to Mattheo.
“Come on Mattheo, I’ve got an audience so I need to make sure I beat you embarrassingly quickly today,” Theodore says, egging his friend on.
“Yeah fucking right,” Mattheo says, turning to Theodore as the two engage in the most awful, embarrassing trash talk. You and Pansy exchange a glance and the two of you side-eye them with disdain.
The simple mind of boys managed to amaze you every time. Their attention span was impressively short.
Proving your point, Mattheo flies up to poke fun at Draco and Lorenzo, who both didn't seem to be holding up too well with the heat. You lean your elbows on the railing and stiffen slightly when Theodore flies up next to you. He hovers on his broom mid-air, resting his elbow on the railing in front of you. His face is incredibly close to yours, analysing your face with those sinful eyes of him which should be illegal because
Fuck, you were deprived.
“You wore it.” He says, and he sounds oddly breathless. You were assured by Blaise mere minutes ago that they had barely started practising.
Why did it seem so hard to speak? Why did Theodore seem so surprised? Why did you feel so bashful?
“You asked.” You respond, and his eyes search yours for a second before a smile tugs at his lips. His hand reaches out to cup your face, tilting it to the side as he looks at the 7 on your cheek.
Was this all it took for Theodore to touch you?
You’d have to start drawing 7 everywhere.
His fingers brush against your jaw, and you let out a shaky breath as his thumb runs along your cheek.
His touch leaves a fiery trail in its wake, and you are sure he has to be doing some sort of nonverbal magic because you feel as though you are going crazy. You resist the urge to let your eyes flutter shut because Theodore Nott simply has that effect.
He turns your head back and you stare at one another for a second more before he pulls back, and your mouth feels awfully dry.
“Mattheo smudged it.” He says, and his voice sounds slightly strained as he says so. You can't keep the corners of your lips from lifting slightly as you nod.
“Right.” You breathe out, looking at him. He grins, and this time you have to be sure you have not secured yourself a one-way ticket to the Janus Thickey Ward of St Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries, because you swear his eyes flicker down to your lips for a brief second before he leans back like he's been forced to do so, wordlessly looking at you once more before he grips the broom with one hand, effortlessly flying up to start practice.
You don’t even have the time to process whatever that was because your ever-eloquent and insightful friend speaks the very thoughts running through your head.
“What in the ever-loving fuck was that?” Pansy utters, eyes wide as she stares at the spot where Theodore was standing.
Amen to that, Pansy. What in the ever-loving fuck was that?
Your hand hovers over your cheek, ghosting over the place Theodore had just touched.
You part your lips to say something, but can't even formulate the words, and Pansy recognises that.
“Holy Shit! He- That-” She says, hands grabbing your shoulders as she shakes you. You're ashamed to say you needed it because you were sure you were dreaming.
“What's going on between you two? First, you’re wearing his number to the match. Then he's practically eye fucking you and you're both literally about to make out.” Pansy babbles and you roll your eyes at her dramatics.
“Oh calm down, Pansy. He barely looked at me, and he was just fixing it because Mattheo had smudged it. There's nothing going on.” She says and Pansy narrows her eyes.
“Oh yes, and I’m fucking straight. We both know that's a lie.” She deadpans, and you shake your head with an exasperated smile.
You couldn't tell whether you wanted to crack up with laughter or strangle the shit out of her. With Pansy, the line blurred more often than not. It’s why you loved her so dearly.
“Genuinely Pansy, nothing’s going on between Theodore and me. We used to be really good friends. That's all.” You say, with a tone of finality. She sighs, mumbling under her breath.
“….Painfully obvious”
“Both know that's a lie…..”
“Hopeless idiot…”
You shoot her a glare at her mumbling and she returns the sentiment with a pointed smile, enough to make you roll your eyes with amusement. You rest your head on her shoulder as the two of you watch the match.
The day Theodore had walked past you like you simply didn't exist was the day you swore to yourself you'd never, EVER, let yourself be good friends with him again. You stuck to your word always, yet this was proving to be one time where you didn't.
You prayed you wouldn't regret this, but alas, the universe is cruel at times.
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The news of Draco’s father cancelling their annual summer holiday trip came surprisingly as great news to your groups as you all lounged in the library (which was as packed as it had ever been thanks to Madam Pince’s cooling charm. You all begged her to teach you the spell but she refused, and you were sure she kept it hidden to make sure people came to the library. Luckily for the group, you were one of the most conscientious students in your year, so you'd all get away with things due to the teachers favouring you greatly. A few other groups were kicked out immediately.)You all sat in a cosy arrangement in the far back end of the library. Pansy sat on the floor beside you, whilst you lounged in an armchair, feet thrown over one arm. Blaise sat on the other arm of the chair, with Draco and Theodore sitting opposite you. Between the armchair and sofa facing one another was a third sofa and a small round table. Mattheo and Lorenzo sat on that third sofa. Lorenzo stretches, sprawled out as he props his feet up on the table. You reach out and slap him with the book you were reading, and he cowers sheepishly as he puts his feet down.
“I was looking forward to summer in Versailles,” Draco complains, and you sigh. Would be nice to be able to go on such trips.
“Actually…” Pansy says, sitting up as though she’s just had an idea. Knowing your friend, you can't help but feel terrified about what's about to come out of her mouth.
“My parents have a beautiful holiday home down in France and they're going to Australia this year, so it's not being used. Why don't we all spend a week there?” Pansy says.
It's actually a very clever Idea, and a chorus of murmurs of agreement and nods echo throughout the group.
“That actually sounds good” Lorenzo says, and Blaise hums in agreement.
“I have family who live in France so they could sort out travel for us when we are there. I'm sure I can go.” Baise says and Pansy claps her hands excitedly, rubbing them together like some kind of evil genius (sometimes you were sure she was.)
“Draco, Theo?” Pansy says, and the mention of Theo's name has your eyes flickering up from your book. He's looking at you but the second your eyes meet he quickly looks at Pansy and nods, clearing his throat.
“Huh? Oh, uh- yeah.Sounds good.” He says. You lightly smile to yourself as you look down at your book.
“ I suppose I’ll tolerate it.” Draco sighs, and a chorus of groans escapes the group at his melodramatic behaviour.
“Oh piss off Draco, just admit you like us,” Mattheo says and Draco scoffs.
The boys very quickly once again get into a semi-play fight, and a stern hush from Madam Pince as she glares at the group of you sends them both sheepishly quiet. She walks away and it’s your turn to glare at the two boys.
“She may like me now, but if you two don't shut up she sure as fuck won't, and ill set your robes on fire if you force me to get through the summer whilst being banned from the library.” You spit, scolding them.
Mattheo and Draco both look down like children being chastised and Blaise has to hide his amusement as he nudges your shoulder, getting up.
“Right well, that's our cue to leave anyway. Have the real match tomorrow so we need an early night.” Blaise says. One by one everyone gets up, Pansy pushing off the floor with a sigh as she dusts down her skirt.
She turns to you, raising a brow.
“You coming?” She asks, holding a hand out and you look up, shaking your head.
“Nah. Gonna stay here for a while. Finish reading this.” You say, holding up your book with a weak smile. Pansy shakes her head with a smile, ruffling your hair (much to your dismay).
“My little neek. Have fun!” She says, and you flip her off at the comment. She grins, blowing a fake kiss back at you as she manoeuvres past the wooden bookshelves and out of the library.
You sigh and feel as though you're sinking further into the plush armchair, a pillow held to your chest as you read your book. Everything about the library was so pleasantly calming. The dim lights that cast dancing shadows of the book spines across the wall. The bibliosmia that you inhaled deeply as you lay for what felt like hours, reading whatever you could get your hands on. You’re so caught up in the allure of the library (Pansy might have a point, you definitely were a neek), that you don't even notice the presence of someone coming to sit down on the sofa next to you until the sound of the leather cushions sagging under weight draws your attention up from the pages of the book.
Seriously? Were you actually that oblivious? It was extremely alarming if you were.
You look up and see Theodore moving to take a seat on the sofa next to you. He stretches out his legs, his large frame suddenly making the space seem a lot smaller.
“Hey.” He says, and your lips quirk up in a smile as you speak.
“Hey,” You respond, folding the corner of your book.
“What are you reading?” Theodore asks, and you raise a brow.
Did he really have an interest in the book you were reading? A few years ago the Theodore you knew would never touch a book (though he would listen to you ramble on about them for an hour.)
But Theodore has changed, And so have you. He’s no longer the Theodore you knew, and the reminder turns the feeling in your stomach unpleasant.
You hold up your book, weakly smiling as you show him the cover. It was rather beaten and bruised, but you had owned this copy since your first year. You’ve reread it more times than you can count.
“Little women,” Theodore says, a small smile of recognition on his face. He remembered you, always walking around with that book. Theodore couldn’t comprehend what half the words in the book meant, but he remembered hearing you talk about it and thinking you were truly the most incredible person he had ever met.
That hadn't really changed.
“Mhmm. Must be my 5th time rereading it this year.” You say, with a small smile, and Theodore lets out a low laugh.
He's looking down at the table, and you admire the way the dim light dances along his features, making them look surprisingly soft.
“Love Jo all your days, if you choose, but don't let it spoil you, for it's wicked to throw away so many good gifts…” Theodore starts, gaze trained ahead.
“......because you can't have the one you want” You finish, quietly.
Theodore's gaze drops to his hands, fiddling with the threads on his bag. The air is thick with unspoken words. A quiet dance of regrets lingers in the spaces between your words.
"Little Women," Theodore repeats, his fingers tracing the zip on his bag. "I remember how you used to quote passages from that book like they were sacred verses. It was almost like a religion for you."
You can sense the undertone in his words—the acknowledgement of a shared past that now exists as a distant echo.
The silence that follows hangs heavy.
You shift uncomfortably in your seat, the worn pages of the book suddenly feeling like a fragile shield against the currents of emotion. Theodore's eyes, once familiar and comforting, now carry a hint of regret and a touch of something unsaid.
"Jo March was always your favourite," he continues, his voice soft, almost hesitant.
“Still is,” you say, and he nods, looking up at you. His smile is tight-lipped, and you fight the urge to reach forward and massage the furrow of his brow. He reaches into the side pocket of his bag, pulling out a book.
Little women.
You frown as you take the copy from him, flicking through it. There are scribbles and annotations all over the pages.
You hate the way you instantly recognise his handwriting - another testament as to how Theodore was weaved into everything you did.
Theodore takes the book back, his fingers lingering on the worn cover. He opens the book, thumbing through the pages, his eyes fixing on the annotations.
"I've been reading it," he admits, his voice a low murmur. "Annotating it. I wanted to see it through your eyes, to understand why it meant so much to you."
You watch him, and your heart clenches at his voice. At his eyes, At the way he speaks, and the way he keeps his head down. The realisation that he held onto this piece of you, even as you both drifted apart, is enough to send you into a spiral.
"I see you in these pages," Theodore continues, his gaze locking onto the annotated paragraphs. "I see you in between the lines, and in the words. I see you in Jo, I see you in the witty comments. Every time I read this, It's like a piece of you is still here with me."
A lump forms in your throat, and you swallow hard, trying to push back the tears that threaten to spill over.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry
“Every time I read these words, I feel like I'm back with you, even if just for a moment." He admits, looking up at you.
The devastation in his eyes is surely mirrored in your own.
You want to cry. You want to shout, because how dare he sit here, and speak of you with such reverence, and act like he cares for you when he had forgotten about you so easily? How dare he say he sees you in everything he does when he looked right past you when you stood in front of him?
How dare he act like he missed you when he didn’t?
You can't say anything. You physically can't, because every time you open your mouth it hurts. Grief clings to the pipes, scratching at your throat. It restricts your breathing, it gnaws at you.
Theodore looks at you and clears his throat, quickly looking down. You fail to make out the fact that his own eyes are threatening to spill with tears, as your own teary eyes cloud your vision.
It was always like that with you and Theodore.
Amid your shared tears, the unspoken suddenly becomes the unsayable.
He gets up, and he can't bear to look at your face because every glance of those tears in your eyes eats away at his heart. He grabs his bag and throws it over his shoulder, rushing out for fear of what you might say.
“See you” He murmurs, walking away. You can’t tear your gaze away from where he walks away even as his form disappears, and you swear the boy had taken part of your heart with him.
The quote “Fate was a cruel mistress” Never made much sense to you. Fate was beautiful even in its destructive nature. Fate was unstoppable, she didn't wait for anyone or veer away. You used to admire that about her. You found it to be a beautiful thing. Of course, it's because you also believe that fate would only wait for you. Wait that one extra second. Then, perhaps, Theodore and you would be on the same path. Instead, you were two, walking the same path only a heartbeat apart. As if time itself conspires to teach that love can occur in the same book, but pages apart.
You cannot love the beauty of her tenacity and cower from it too.
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pinkthrone445 · 2 months
Text
-Abbott's house- Part 2
Part 1
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Pairing:Melissa Schemmenti x Reader
Gender:Fluff, funny, soft
Warnings:none(?) future smut
Summary:The district gives the school the idea of spending a month living together to strengthen bonds, you never thought that would change your relationship with some so much.
Hi! This is an interactive story, if some thinks about something funny that one of the people of Abbott would be like to do, and you would like me to introduce it in the second part of the fic, you can leave it on the comments. I hope you like this part! Thanks for your coments!
It had been a couple of days since you had slept with Melissa, and instead of you stopping thinking about it as time went on, your desire to sleep with her again and feel her warmth near you only grew, it had been years since you had had such a perfect and peaceful night's sleep.
When the weekend came, some planned to go home on their days off to visit relatives, Barbara would see her husband again, and Mr. Johnson would see a son he had, which you were very surprised to learn that he was a father. Mel decided to stay since she had nothing else to do, just like you, Jacob, Janine, and Gregory. Ava said she was going to see her boyfriend and that it was forbidden to enter her room.
Jacob, Janine, and Gregory planned to go to a bar, but you didn't feel like it, so you decided to make other plans. Mel didn't want to leave you alone, so she decided to stay with you without knowing what she was getting into.
As night came, you started to pack your bag to go out, Mel sat on her bed watching what you were doing
-"Are you going to tell me where we're going to go?" - she asked, and you shook your head, laughing at her annoyed face
-"To a mall that I saw online..."-You muttered, hiding the true purpose, Mel decided to go along with you even though she knew you were lying.
When everything was ready, the two of you got into Melissa's car, you gave her the address, and you let her drive.
When you arrived at the location you gave her, the two of you got out of the car and she didn't hesitate to take your hand, which made you smile as you felt how well your hand fit hers and how her warmth always balanced your cold hands.
-"This doesn't look like a mall, I'm afraid you'll abandon me here..."-She muttered and you laughed, it wasn't a mall, but if you told her where you were going, maybe she wouldn't want to, yso you wanted to save yourself that trouble. As she entered the building, Mel understood why you had been so vague with what you were telling her. It was a skating rink, which she didn't know how to do and probably would have refused to come if you had told her, but seeing your excited face to be there, she decided to stay.
-"Let's go rent some skates!" - You screamed and tugged at her hand. Once ready, you entered the skate rink but the redhead wouldn't let go of your hand-"Do you want me to get you a walker to help you keep your balance?" - You asked truthfully and she shook her head laughing out of nervousness and embarrassment
-"I'm not a child, I can do it alone" -she muttered stubborn
-"If you say so" - You let go of her hand and started skating around her , twirling and doing little pirouettes
-"How are you so good at ice skating?" - She murmured in surprise and annoyed without moving from the spot, she looked like a cat near the water with how tense she was
-"A friend taught me... It's nice, give it a try!" - You screamed excitedly and skated a little farther away from her
-"Don't abandon me, please" - She whispered, embarrassed that she couldn't take a single step alone
-"I thought you could do it alone... Do you want me to push you?" - You asked with wickedness in your laughing voice, if your face was an emoji at that moment, it would be the devil smiling
-"No! Don't even think about it! I'll take off my skates and kick your ass... Come here and hold my hand" -She demanded and you came over laughing and let her put her hands around your arm, starting to skate gently with her
-"Thank you for coming with me Mel... I know this is not your first choice of activity... But I love to skate and I wanted to share it with you... Form a good memory together" - You whispered and felt her grip on your arm grow tighter
-"It's okay, it's more fun than I thought... Besides I like knowing what you like and what you don't... Like scary movies, maybe I'll use that to my advantage while we're here so we have to sleep together again" - She joked and you laughed a little, blushing.
For a while the two skated talking about a couple of things, sharing anecdotes and jokes until it was time to close so you had to leave. You carefully guided Mel, who hadn't let go of your arm in all this time, to the edge of the rink and made her sit down so she could remove her skates. Carefully you knelt in front of her and untied the shoelaces
-"I can do it hon" - She murmured, looking at you and you nodded
-"I know you can do it, but I want to help you anyway"-You responded by carefully removing her skates and putting her shoes on, when you looked up, the redhead was looking at you with something hidden behind her eyes, a look you couldn't quiet decipher, it was as if her gaze let out words that her lips couldn't say yet.
-"Thanks hon" - She whispered with a different tone in her voice, one you hadn't heard before
-"You are welcome Mel..."-You whispered as well, mesmerized by her eyes. After a few more seconds, you cleared your throat looking away from her and changed your own shoes.
The return home was peaceful, the comfortable silence was filled by soft music as you looked at the street lights with a smile that you couldn't wipe off your face.
-"Are you okay hon?" - Mel's voice brought you back to the present, and you nodded
-"Yes... It was a beautiful night, I enjoyed it a lot... It's been a while since I've had such a good time, I wish nights like this lasted a little longer..."-You muttered without thinking and looked out the window again after smiling at her
-"We're in no hurry to go home" - She replied and you looked at her confused
-"What do you mean?" -You frowned more
-"I mean the night isn't over yet, are you hungry? - She consulted smiling at you and you nodded
-"I could eat"-You answered, and at that very moment, the redhead changed the course she was driving in and headed to a drive-thru to order food. Without consulting you, she ordered your favorite food as if she had known it for years, which surprised you, then she ordered for herself and paid-"How do you know what my favorite food is?" - You asked, still surprised, and she laughed
-"Because I pay attention to you, whenever you bring this food to work, you do a little dance of happiness"-she muttered and you blushed. Instead of giving you your food on the spot, she kept driving to a secluded spot where there were almost no lights.
-"Mel? What are we doing? Are you going to give me my last meal and then you're going to kill me?" - You joked and she laughed, shaking her head
-"No...I just want you to keep enjoying the night" - The redhead opened the glass of the car ceiling and told you to look through it, as there were no lights nearby, the stars were seen in their maximum splendor and the moon looked bigger than ever. Mel took the food and gave you your share smiling-"Enjoy" - She whispered, caressing your hand and you stopped seeing the sky to see her in her eyes
-"Perfection..."-You whispered, not quite sure if you meant it because of the beauty of the stars or because of her beauty, everything was perfect, specially her.
As you ate, music played softly in the background, your chest brimming with calm and happiness.
When you finished, a soft and fresh air began to run, as the roof was open, a shiver ran through your body. Mel carefully leaned back your seat and hers and then covered you with her coat, the position you were in, was perfect for continuing to gaze at the stars. The redhead grabbed her cell phone, put it in the car and started playing your favorite series and then leaned back in her seat again. Silently and delicately you reached for her hand and intertwined your fingers with hers without saying anything else, the caresses she began to give in your hand, relaxed you even more.
From the moment you arrived at that house you didn't know what was going on, but you liked to enjoy the attention that Mel gave you. At school you were friends, but not to this point of trust that you were having right now.
When the second episode started, the redhead noticed that you had fallen asleep holding her hand, smiled at how cute you looked, stopped the series that was playing. She carefully buckled you up and then drove slowly home.
When you got home, Melissa saw that Jacob's car was already at the driveway, meaning they already had comeback from the club.
You were deep asleep in the passenger seat, lying and facing the same side that Mel was driving, the redhead turned off the car and stared at you for a few seconds, your breathing was calm and you looked happy even in your sleep, your lips were slightly parted and your hand was touching slightly her leg. You looked so peaceful and beautiful, your lips soft, soft, plump and ready to kiss. The redhead began to lean gently towards you, almost brushing her lips against yours. Your breath tickled her face as she checked to see if you were really asleep. When she was about to connect her lips with yours, Jacob ran out of the house smiling in relief at the sight of Melissa's car, the young man glued himself to the window of the car screaming, not knowing that you were asleep because of the tinted windows
-"Melissa! Help us! Jeannine it's trying to cook!!"-His screams caused you to wake up scared and startled, almost hitting Melissa because of how close she was to you
-"Hey! Hey hon, it's okay, you're safe, it's just Jacob being Jacob" - The redhead took your hands gently and caressed them, making you soothe a little, then she kissed your forehead and the tip of your nose making you laugh a little lost and sleepy-"That's it... That's better sweetheart... Jacob we will be there in a minute" - she told your housemate and helped you put on her jacket before getting out of the car with you.
Upon entering, Mel thought you were going straight to the room to continue sleeping, but instead you stayed by her side
-"Don't you want to sleep anymore? When I'm done cooking something for them, I'll go to the room... I don't want to risk Janine burning down the house for trying to cook..." - She murmured and you laughed as you sat at the counter watching her cook
-"I'll wait for you, I don't like to be in the room alone" - You murmured and hugged yourself with the redhead's jacket you were wearing, taking advantage and breathing in her perfume.
While Mel cooked, she would treat you to small bites on your lips to get your opinion on whether there was anything more to the plate. When the food was ready, you and Mel went to the dorm room. Mel was about to lie down on her bed when she heard your soft voice inviting her to sleep with you, which she couldn't say no to and crossed over to your bed hugging you and giving you warmth, helping you sleep better.
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toxicanonymity · 7 months
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when raider met sweet pea
1k words  | analysis of raider!Joel x f!reader
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Raider Joel Master List 
This is a peek inside early, unevolved raider joel in the original fic from March. We know how much he’s grown since then, but he’s done terrible, inexcusable things, and he knows it.  NOTES: You're referred to as sweet pea in this, Joel's pet name for you. General HC followed by Q&A. Thank you @milla-frenchy for always having good Qs. I have great Qs from others too that I'll get to as I can (looking at u @javier-penas-wifexx420, and others). To raider's pr team, sorry for going back in time but FIWB. WARNINGS: References to noncon, assault.
Here’s how I HC what happened under the surface:  When Joel interrupted the men from taking sweet pea, it wasn't a noble rescue mission. Mainly, he was fed up with the men and wanted to put them in their place. But then, one of the men used the butt of his rifle under her chin to make her look up, and this is what unlocked or triggered something in Joel:  She looked at Joel thinking he was saving her, and something in her face had a subconscious effect on him -- like he saw her hope and appreciation, and saw someone looking at him like he was a good man who mattered to them. It made him feel needed, which he hadn’t felt for so long that he didn’t even recognize the feeling, or know how to feel it, much less what to do with it.
That moment created the tiniest crack, a minuscule window into the man buried under the persona built by trauma and the apocalypse. The crack was too tiny to change his behavior yet, but that tiny window allowed him to see a glimmer of something else possible and allowed him to subconsciously connect with her in a way he hadn't connected in ages.  From his raider persona, everyone is pretty 2D, so consciously, he's not seeing or treating her (or anyone) as a real person at this point. But that moment still resulted in a “spark,” like a magnetism, and the crack in his shell grows over time. 
When he takes her inside: it was likely unusual that he took her somewhere private. Normally, he does things in front of the other men to show dominance (see Stash House).  Subconsciously, that tiny part of him wanted to feel like a protector, and taking her somewhere private may have been his pathetic idea of a protective gesture, physically picking her up and taking her away from the worse (more violent) guys.
He takes her to the room intending for her to suck his dick by default, but I don't think P in V was always his intent:  He doesn't threaten or mention fucking her upfront when he’s telling her what’s going to happen.  He tells her she's gonna suck his dick and to be a good girl and it'll be over quick. While she sucks him, he decides he has to have her (be inside her).  He says "alright sweet pea, now pull down your pants for me." He was acting on his primitive urges and what his body wanted in that moment for whatever reason -- he's a raider and has a huge sense of entitlement. Even though his escalation wasn’t out of malice, the effect is that he made the attack worse. He’s a bad person and a r*pist, and he knows it.
(Note, I’m only censoring this word because other people censor it and I sense some people find it jolting to see even if they read noncon. I'm not censoring it to try to make him look better. His past is a part of him, there's no getting around the fact that he's a r*pist. He's the last person who would want it forgiven or excused. He kinda hates himself ). 
Q: I've been wondering if he could have done to other women what he did to sweet pea in the 1st chapter
He did at least make other women suck his dick in the past. As for how he sees his past behavior now, it'll come out eventually, not like an OOC monologue, like a word in passing or implied here or there.
Q: I think you wrote somewhere that Joel didn't approve of the behavior of some of his men with women, and that Carter wasn't like that (was I dreaming?)  
The men who had sweet pea at the beginning of ch 1 are more physically aggressive and violent with women, physically forcing them and hurting them, whereas Joel calmly told sweet pea what to do (while he was heavily armed) and didn’t physically hurt her. The other men will smack them around and gang rape them. Joel feels like that behavior from men is weak, like if you're going to physically hurt someone, pick on someone your own size. He doesn’t feel moral superiority for this (I mean he doesn't see himself as a good guy), but he sees himself as stronger and more dominant than men who need to hurt a weaker person.
Q: Why is he so possessive and jealous, since day 1? In failed rescue : "He describes you. Joel’s jaw clenches and his eyes darken.  He waits a beat before answering." I love that 😏 but it's super fast. Did she trigger something in him from day one?
When he initially decided she's his so quickly, most importantly, he means she's not anyone else's. He's in charge, he's claimed her, he's dominant, and he's the boss. That was his original intent and he didn't expect it to go further than that.  But it goes beyond that because of the moment explained above. So it's also his primitive instinct that she's his, and that’s what you see when her bf describes her in your quote. Whatever connection or feeling was created by the way she looked at Joel made her special, and he couldn't let go of it. So she became like a precious possession at that point. Since then, he’s slowly evolved to where she’s not just a possession, but certainly still his. 
Thank you so much for reading. I really adore everyone's interest and investment in raider!Joel. If you love raider joel, please interact with his fics -- it's always better late than never. Comments mean a lot no matter how small, and reblogs mean a lot regardless of blog size. I know most of raider's fans started as lurkers, and I don't judge for your lurking era. Most of my tumblr bffs started as lurkers.
Ik the tense is all over the place in this sorry lol
TY ILY 🖤🖤🖤
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angstylittleb1tch · 10 months
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Who am I to you? (Aether x creator!reader)
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Summary: It is an imposter sagau universe where creator!reader escapes from her acolytes to the far corners of Sumeru and decides to start a flower shop but an unexpected guest comes for a visit...
Note: This is my very First Fic EVER. I do admit I'm no master at writing but I'm trying to learn and am open to criticism so please don't hesitate to correct me in my pronunciation, grammar, spelling or knowledge on any mentioned topic. Thanks!
Warnings: Yandere? (If you squint), mentions of swords, vines used as binding equipment (not bdsm you lil shits)
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The sky today was just as beautiful as it was every day. Granted it never really changed due to teyvat basically just being zero's and one's but no one but you knew about that so better not to mention it.
Previous to your 'decent' into teyvat, you were just like any other gacha gamer who stumbled upon Genshin by accident and became addicted to it in a short span of time. Naturally, that had let you to explore more about this fandom which had eventually landed you to the sagau corner of Genshin fanfics which is why being teleported or rather isekai'd to teyvat wasn't a very shocking experience.
However, you weren't just going to walk into Mondstadt like the other fanfics, no. You were much calmer and more grounded not to mention clever. Never once were the acolytes alerted of your presence in teyvat as you slowly over the span of a few months made your way to Sumeru, making sure to stay hidden for days on end and to take all the longer but less active routes.
In your first week in Sumeru, you had found out that the traveler had yet to cross paths with the dendro archon and was still in Inazuma, so you had a general idea of where in the timeline you were.
Since you had no family or even proof of birth or existence in teyvat, finding a job was increasingly difficult along with keeping your identity hidden. However, as if you were blessed by some all-knowing power, higher than gods, you encountered an old yet very kind lady who allowed you to live with her at the outskirts of Sumeru so long as you helped her run her little flower shop.
Months passed in the blink of an eye, and you found yourself growing soft towards the lady you grew to see as your own grandmother. She insisted you call her that and you happily obliged. Your trust and love towards her grew so much so that eventually you decided to tell her the truth about your origins and status of creator in this world.
Though shocked at first, she never treated you any differently than before, and appeared to be more understanding of your situation. Both of you lived your life in happiness, away from the world. However due to being cut off from the world you were late to know that the traveler had successfully taken care of the Shouki no Kami and saved Sumeru from the scheming Akademiya.
Neither did you have any idea about how frivolously Aether had been turning teyvat upside down trying to look for you.
Unlike the other acolytes, Aether held a deeper connection with you, the creator. He was the first one you guided and the first to get to know your aura. There was absolutely no way he wouldn't find out about your arrival to teyvat. It was honestly better the others didn't. Imagine if everyone knew the creator was just walking amongst the common folk. That would certainly cause a panic amongst everyone.
He had to find you before the others did. He had to know. He had to see your face in person. One he had seen through the illusion of the sky way too many times before. One he had grown to love.
Yes, Aether was indeed in love with you. He had fallen not too long ago but he had fallen far. How couldn't he? You were just perfect in every way conceivable. Your eyes? Absolutely beautiful, he could have one glance and an eternity would have passed for him. Your smile? Mesmerizing. Oh, what he wouldn't give just to see a glimpse of it. He was sure he'd slay even the mightiest of gods, even Celestia, if it meant he'd be rewarded with one of your smiles.
It was entirely safe to say that when he'd gotten wind that there was a flower shop located at the ends of Sumeru said to house flowers no one had ever seen before, he was beyond intrigued. Especially since some poor soul he saw in Sumeru city had the same flower his sister always wore in her hair just laying around, claiming he bought it from your shop.
Now he just had to figure out what kind of a person would sell such a rare and practically impossible flower to get your hands on so freely. So, without thought, he soon found himself Infront of your little flower shop in the middle of nowhere with his eyes set straight at the door.
He could definitely feel your presence, it was everywhere. The plants, the flowers, the animals and even the air itself felt.... purified. It had to be your work. There was no doubt about it. Even Paimon didn't say a word for once in her life. She was too curious and perhaps a little uneasy at what kind of a deity she was to face now.
Unlike Paimon however, Aether could barely contain himself enough to stand. After a while of trying to gather courage to step in, he finally opened the door and was greeted by a view equivalent to the Fields of Elysium.
The sun rays fell through the windows lighting up the place, vast arrays of flowers were laid bare anywhere the eye could reach, wisteria flowers were hung from the ceiling as if they were growing from the skies above.
Never once before had Aether truly felt at home anywhere before more than here.
"I'll be there in just a second!" A sweet voice called out to him breaking him from his trance. It was you; you were talking to him. Addressing him. Before he could fully fathom what was to happen, you came out from the back of the store finally giving him a full view of your face.
"Hello there, how can I be of help today?" You greeted him.
Despite keeping up your calm, aloof and cheerful persona, you were panicking inside. Never once did you think you would meet him today. Him. Aether. Of course, you knew who he was. If his bright blonde hair wasn't a dead giveaway, then the floating ball of joy next to him definitely shouted out his identity to you.
You wanted to shout, to scream, to go up and crush Aether in a bone wrenching hug. You wanted to tell him how sorry you were for not being able to help him on his journey to find his sister. You wanted to hold him and take all his pain away. You wanted to tell him that you would be there for him.
That you Loved him. That you Love him.
Alas you couldn't, because there was no way in the entirety of teyvat that he would be able to let a stranger do that.
That's all you were to him of course. He didn't know you. There was no way he would. No one knew who you were, otherwise, you wouldn't be alive in this shop right now.
"Uhm hello?" You asked him, finally getting out of your own thoughts and noticing that he had been silent the whole time.
As if something snapped by your words, Aether finally came to his senses and responded,
"Ah! Yes! Oh, hi hello ahem I'm totally not staring."
You chuckled at his nervousness. "Never said you were."
If Aether's cheeks and ears weren't red earlier, they definitely were now. Your laugh was so pretty. He could never get enough of it.
"So, are you looking for any specific flowers? We have tons of variety; some I can assure you've never seen before! If you need, I can recommend you if you're buying for a specific occasion or I could just show you some general-" You smiled as you talked on and rambled about the flowers and Aether wasn't even sure if he was listening.
You looked absolutely ethereal, and Aether was so sure he was in heaven right now or somewhere close to it because archons were you beautiful. Even the Archon of Love would be jealous of your allure.
It's as if you were an enchantress, and in all honestly Aether wouldn't mind if you were, all because of the look you were giving him right now. He was already in cloud 9.
"-and so, I would definitely recommend the peonies. Hey? Are you even listening?"
"Hmm? Oh! Yes of course, Peonies, right? I'll take a bouquet."
"Alright just a moment, by the way, you never told me how you got here? I mean this place is pretty off the map, quite hard to stumble by it."
You knew exactly what you were doing, there was no way Aether just stumbled upon your shop out of nowhere. It was too out of character for him. Was there a reason he came here? Did he know?
"Oh, uhm I was uh recommended! Yes, I saw another traveler I came across in Sumeru own a rather unique flower, so I asked him where he got it, and he told me it was from your shop so here I am."
"I see, what flower was it? If you liked it so much, I could give you a few, consider it on the house."
"Are you sure? It's completely fine, I'll pay for them."
"No, it's alright, you can have them for free, don't worry about it. So which one was it?"
"Ahem, well it's the 'Inteyvat'"
"Oh. That flower.... I see you have an eye for flowers huh."
"Not really, it just... holds sentimental value. How about you, how'd you come across it?"
"Ah well you see, the seeds were given to me by my grandma, i suppose it's a family heirloom."
Both of you knew that neither of you told the entire truth however addressing it would cause a LOT of explanation, one you just weren't ready for, not before your coffee at least.
"So, what did you say your name was again?"
"Why? Are you trying to take me out on a date?"
"Would you say yes if I were?"
"Paimon will pay for the food!"
I guess everyone's a little bold today.
"I'm sorry did I hear that right? You? Paimon? The one who has less mora than Zhongli? Will pay for my date? That is only possible if we're going on a date in my dreams."
"WHY YOU-! Fine! Paimon won't be paying for your food then since you're such a big meanie to Paimon. And excuse you- Paimon isn't broke ok! Infact Paimon is richer than the traveler!"
"Paimon, how many times have I told you, those 'primogems' of yours are not actual currency."
"AGH-! Paimon's had it with you today! First you make Paimon fly the whole way here without telling why and now you're making fun of Paimon! That's it, Paimon is going to tattle to xiangling about how you actually threw away the Black-Back Perch Stew she made for you and only pretended to eat it because you were so full from Sara's cooking!"
You watched stifling your giggles as Aether's Face dropped into a terrified expression.
"NO! I'm sorry Paimon, please don't tell xiangling about that, she will murder me if she finds out. You don't want me dying.... do you?"
"Hmph"
"Please Paimon I'm begging you I don't want to die so young! I'll never make fun of you again! I'll even stop calling you emergency food so please! Anything but xiangling's wrath...."
You just couldn't hold it in anymore. If anything, Aether's pleading added to your amusement, and you burst in a fit of laughs.
Aether had almost forgotten you were here. His gaze turned to you and a smile creeped up his face which soon turned into and embarrassed look as he realized you had front row seats to his predicament.
"Hey! It's not that funny y/n! I'm serious! Stop making fun of me- Oh just great now Paimon's laughing too!" Though Aether was seeming to be embarrassed he was happy he could make you laugh like that.
That was until your smile disappeared from your face as you registered what he said.
"I never told you my name."
Both Aether and Paimon looked at each other as the atmosphere took a turn for the worse. There was no humor in your voice and your face looked cold, completely contradicting your laughs and smiles earlier.
"I- Please let me expla-"
Just as Aether took a single step in your direction vines sprung at him, securing him in his place as they wrapped around him. Paimon tried to pry them off but to no avail. He looked back up towards you but all he saw was a pure black sword pointing at his throat and a dark look in your eyes.
"Who am I to you."
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Well, that went well. I think? I'm still trying to figure out how I want to end this fic but I'm not completely clueless. I will be making a nice lil happy ending though. Anyways if you have any suggestions on how you want this fic to end then I'm open to them. Gosh Writing is hard, my respect for authors just skyrocketed.
Also, just a reminder that THIS IS MY FIRST FIC so please be nice and generous in your criticism otherwise if you don't like it them you can fuck skedaddle right off, Thank you very much.
Anyways, I'm gonna go sleep now It's like 2 am rn and I have to go on a trip in like a day so yeah, until I decide to post the next part fellow beings.
Signing off.
Also, PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT IM BEGGING YOU I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS WORK IS EQIVALENT OF SHIT OR IF ITS ACTUALLY DECENT.
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sanguineterrain · 7 months
Note
What about a Jason x Reader drabble where they were close friends before he died and they reunite years later, changed and burdened but still equally fond of each other? I know you could write that beautifully heartbreakingly or on the contrary, very softly and warmly :)
oh, you *debby ryan hair tuck* you nonnies flatter me 🥰 thanks for requesting! please heed the warnings, this one is technically a happy ending but it's a heavy one!
jason todd x gn!reader. tw: reader doesn't know what's real, reader thinks they're dreaming and tries to jump off a railing (but they're okay), grief, angst, jason coming back from the dead, emotional hurt/comfort.
I rb all fics to @sanguinelibrary | requests are still open
****
He's on your terrace.
You walk forward, and Jason promptly puts distance between you. He looks stricken, like he's looking at a ghost.
He's not the Jason you usually see in these dreams. This Jason is what could've been.
This Jason is saved.
"Hi, Jason," you say. "Jaybird. Robin."
Jason exhales like you've punched him. He's dressed differently than he usually is in your dreams. Usually, he's in his Robin suit. Sometimes he's in his funeral suit, and his face is battered, and his bones jut out at odd angles. And he looks at you with hollowed out eyes and asks why you killed him, over and over.
"You look different," you say.
Jason huffs. It sounds wet. With blood or tears, you're not sure. It's always one or the other in your dreams.
"Yeah," he says, and God, even his voice is different than usual. When he begs you to finish the job. When he hurls blame at you.
You deserve it. You're not sure you can take it from this version of him, though. You're trying to remember where you saw a man with Jason's face that your brain used to conjure up this twisted dream.
"I think I'll jump this time," you say, gazing at the terrace railing behind him.
Jason flinches, eyes wide. "What? Don't do that."
You hum. "'S okay, Jay. I love seeing you, but I've been terribly tired this week. I don't want to watch you die again. I'd rather wake up."
He makes a small, wounded noise.
"God, what did I do to you?" he asks.
"It's alright," you say. If Jason starts to panic, the nightmares will come. And it's cruel now, seeing Jason like this, seeing what could've been. But at least he's not dead. Yet.
You start to move to the terrace. You want the dream to end.
Jason steps in front of you. His face is young, probably your age, but his body is older, powerful. His muscles are nearly the size of your head. He's so healthy and strong tonight.
"You're... you're so big," you whisper, marveling over his height and bulk.
Jason had been lithe and small when you knew him. You were certain he'd turn out like Dick, and you suggested learning gymnastics.
Jason would grumble at that, but you knew he adored it whenever Dick gave him the time of day.
He hunches now, acutely aware of his size. His knees are bent slightly, and his hands are clasped together, like he's trying not to tower over you.
The thought makes you ache. Does Jason think you're afraid of him?
"Don't jump," he says firmly.
"Okay," you say. You'll do it when he's distracted. The dream will take a turn soon.
You step forward again, arms falling open. Jason was never one for hugs, but surely he'd make an exception this time, right? You haven't seen him in so long.
But Jason steps back. You stop.
"Jason," you say, voice small. "I don't get to see you much. Will you hug me?"
"I..." The word is weak in his throat. His voice is different. Deeper. Rougher. You think about him screaming, and you shake your head to dismiss that thought.
Jason swallows. "I came back wrong."
"No, you didn't," you say. "It's never wrong if you came back."
He winces. "It is. I am. I'm... You've got a good thing going. A good life. You're goin' to college and everything. I-I shouldn't have come here."
"No, Jason, you won't ruin anything. I'm glad you're here. Please let me touch you. I've missed you so much," you beg, slightly hysterical.
You step forward again. This time, Jason doesn't move away. He lets you trace his sharp jaw, his cheeks. Green eyes bore into you. That's weird. His eyes were blue. As blue as Bruce's.
Oh, well. Your brain must be using details from whoever you saw that resembled Jason.
"This is nice," you say, and finally wrap your arms around him.
A beat passes, and then Jason hugs you back. His embrace is careful, and it's almost funny, the thought of Jason needing to be delicate with you. You don't laugh, though. You're too tired for that.
"Okay," you say, because you have a feeling things are going to turn dark. That you'll pull back and find that you've been hugging a corpse.
The cold railing digs into your spine. You smile at Jason.
"It was good to see you," you say.
And then you fall.
You wait for the drop in your stomach, to jerk awake in your bed.
Instead, Jason lunges after you and hauls you back onto the terrace. He's shaking. A breeze blows gently and ruffles his hair.
"What the fuck are you doing?" he shouts.
His arms are tight around your waist. Your heart starts to pound.
"You caught me," you say. Your brain feels like sludge. "You never catch me."
Jason moans like he's mourning. Like you're the one who died and came back to haunt him.
"God, I'm so sorry," he says, choked. "Fuck, I am so fucking sorry. I should've stayed dead."
"No," you say softly. "No. This isn't real. You're not real."
"I am, sweetheart. I—"
"No," you say again, panic rising. "You're not real. Jason Todd is dead."
Jason takes your hand and places it on his chest. His heart beats. You scream.
"Shh, it's alright," he says, tears running down his cheeks. "It's okay, it's okay—"
"You died, you died! I killed you, I killed you!" you scream, pushing at his chest. "I killed you!"
"You didn't kill me. Please, listen to me. It's-it's okay." He pulls you into his chest and tries to keep you still. You thrash, but Jason just holds you, crying into your shoulder.
"No, no, no, not again, don't leave me again," you yell, voice cracked with grief. "Not again, I can't survive losing you again. Let me wake up, wake up!"
"You're awake. I'm here. I'm here. I'm alive. Hold me. Prove that I'm real."
You squeeze him as hard as you can. You rake your nails down his neck, trying to make him disappear. Jason just hugs you tighter.
"Am I dead?" you ask, and Jason gasps.
"No, you're alive. We're both alive. Okay? Okay? Say it. Tell me I'm alive."
"You're alive," you say. "You're alive. I'm alive."
He nods and buries his nose in your neck. You grab handfuls of his shoulders, ready to wake up any second. Maybe you can take him back with you.
"Jason Todd is alive," you say, and hope to God you'll wake up to that being true.
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impactedfates · 6 months
Note
Hello it's me so I decided to change up my idea a little. So here's what I thought, the reader is a quiet, humble and kind person and is engaged to Dan Heng but the readers evil mother and sister along with their neglectful father decided to kidnap them and try to force them to leave Dan Heng but they refused because Dan Heng made them feel like they actually belonged somewhere and they also knew that Dan Heng would save them. This all occurred not long after Dan Heng went to the readers family home with March and Caelus after he officially became engaged to the reader, The reason the three of them were even there was because Dan Heng wanted them to sincerely apologize for all the pain and suffering they put his fiance through. (This was inspired by the Netflix anime My Happy Marriage and I wish you a good morning/afternoon or goodnight)
★ A/N: Finally got to this request! My apologies for taking so long to start this, I hope you enjoy it :D
☆ Genre/Trope: Romantic + Hurt/Comfort (?)
★ Format: Fic (W.C: 1594)
☆ Warnings: Reader is kidnapped // Implied abuse from readers family // (Any I missed, please inform me)
★ Extra: I don't know much about My Happy Marriage but I hope this was written well even so // Reader is shorter then Dan Heng, only slightly though // Modern-ish AU? // Characters in this are probably OOC, I'm sorry
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"I Belong With You" - Dan Heng x GN! Reader
“Your family is so stuck up!”
March complained, crossing her arms as she arrived home with you, Dan Heng and Caelus. Caelus patted her back but it was clear with his expression he wasn’t happy how the meeting with your parents turned out. You rubbed your arms a bit, looking down.
“I’m sor-”
“It’s not your fault”
Your fiance, Dan Heng quickly said, looking at you softly. Holding onto your hand gently and rubbing his thumb along your fingers, he pulled you a bit closer. Trying his best to reassure you as March and Caelus went into the kitchen to prepare some dinner as no one really ate when they were visiting your old childhood home.
“It won’t ever be your fault for how your parents were acting today and how they were acting when you were younger. If your family refused to apologise for what they did no matter what I, March or Caelus said. Then that’s on them. Never blame yourself for the actions of someone else”
Dan Heng said softly into your ear, gently rubbing the back of your head. Although he may not be the best at comforting someone, you can tell he always tries his best. And his words did make you feel better, snuggling into him more, he planted a small kiss to your forehead.
It was Dan Hengs idea to head over with you. You had gotten a letter from your parents requesting you to come over. You could only guess it was because your sister had found out about your engagement with Dan Heng. Whatever the reason, you went to visit, and your fiance was insistent on coming with you. You never went into great detail about how your parents were like or how you were treated. How neglectful your father was and the pain you suffered due to your mother and your sister.
Dan Heng never pried, even when your family acted so sweet and kind when you arrived with your fiance and 2 of your friends. But he couldn’t ignore what he heard or witnessed when your mother requested to talk to you in private, how your sister was quick to follow and the uneasy look you had. He had to check, and hearing the harsh things they told you didn’t make him happy.
He had to tell March and Caelus, which resulted in an argument. While Dan Heng tried to be calmer, trying to explain how their actions weren’t right. And with March and Caelus helping, it made your parents and sister extremely defensive. At the end of it, March had stormed out as it was clear to her that your family wasn’t going to listen. Caelus quickly followed suit and it left you and Dan Heng staring at your parents. Eventually the two of you also left, leaving the unfinished dinner on the table to grow even colder than the atmosphere that had been created.
You listened to the bickering of the pink haired girl and the grey haired man as they attempted to cook your favourite meal to make you feel better, and the soothing voice of your partner. When it was time to finally eat, you were quick to check your phone which had been on silent. You’ve received dozens upon dozens of messages and missed calls from each individual of your family. With a shaky hand you were quick enough to block them. It was better to not think of them when all they did was cause pain to you anyways. Besides, you belong with the express family now. No need to see your family again.
.
.
.
But perhaps your parents didn’t agree with that. At night, you lay awake as Dan Heng was fast asleep beside you on your shared bed. Still your mind was spiralling in what had happened. Getting up, you decide to get a cup of water and take a walk outside, leaving a note about your where-a-bouts unsure when you’d be able to clear your head.
You weren’t even sure how long you’ve been walking, but eventually something hard had hit the back of your head and you blacked out. Only waking up when a bright light flashed into your eyes, and once your eyes adjusted they grew wide as you saw your sisters grin.
“Finally sleeping beauty…if you even fit that description”
She giggled, quickly motioning for someone to come over, your mother slowly walked into your perspective looking at you. Still with no care or love in her eyes as she stared into yours.
“The ropes might be tight, but it’s a must. Knowing you, you’d be trying to run and scream in hysterics. You really shouldn’t be hanging out with those people sweetheart”
It was only then that you realised the ropes tying your hands behind your back. Attaching you to a pole. You recognized the area as the basement that you grew all too familiar with as a child. You moved back the best you could with them, when the last statement your mother said really registered into your head.
“...What’s that meant to mean?”
“March 7th, she’s way too loud. That Caelus is too dirty, has anyone taught him manners? Don’t get me started on your so called fia-”
“Don’t insult them like that”
You defended quickly, looking at her. Your sister eyed you and rolled her eyes, crossing her arms as she took the spotlight, speaking up.
“Mothers right. He’s strange in his own right…somehow he still deserves better then you though”
She laughed, as your mother laughed alongside the “joke” she made. You quickly shook your head. Looking at them. You were not about to lose someone that actually makes you feel loved, cared for, the one you belonged to. The one you should be with.
“I’m not leaving him”
You muttered out, loud enough for the two of them to turn their heads and look at you. Your mother narrowing her eyes as she walked over, you looked away and quickly repeated yourself, but it seemed like your mother didn’t care. Not like you expected her too. The two of them continued trying to convince you to break the marriage off with Dan Heng. It started off with simple sentences to make you feel worse about yourself, to make it feel like you didn’t deserve Dan Heng. But the more you refused to listen, the more they started to get more violent in their words.
Until your father came downstairs, spotting you he could only glance at you for a second before telling the girls that dinner was ready. He didn’t bother sparing you another glance as he walked back upstairs.
.
.
.
“Where is my fiance.”
Dan Heng demanded, looking at your father. If looks could kill, Caelus would bet that your father would’ve dropped dead by now. He looked back at the man as he continued trying to deny your whereabouts. March was quick to speak up.
“Oh stop your yapping, we know YOU know where they went. So tell us now”
“Maybe they realised they didn’t deserve you and left”
The sister called, popping her head out from behind the older man. She had a shit-eating grin as she looked at the three annoyed trailblazers. Caelus rolled his eyes at the girl's attempt to “sweeten” the mood if you could even call it that and continued looking intently at the father.
“They left a note saying they were on a walk, and now they’re not back. It’s been hours. And I know you had something to do with it”
Dan Heng said, his patience wearing thin as your father tried to dismiss him once again. The vidyadhara took a deep breath in and out before, without another word. Shoving past the father and was quick to attempt to look for you. March in a panic, not expecting what had happened to happen, was quick to jump on the sister and hold her on the ground as Caelus decided to do the same with the father.
“Darling?”
He called out, hoping you were near enough to hear him, and eventually he heard a voice from behind one of the doors. A voice that belonged to you. He was quick to rush in and find you tied up. You looked at him and tried your best to get closer despite your restraints, he was quick to rush over and help free your arms. Once checking you were okay. You hugged him tightly. Softly crying into his shoulder as he held you close.
.
.
.
The events that transpired after? Your mother had heard the commotion and went to call the police for a breaking in and entering crime, but when they arrived and got statements, they checked cameras. They were quick to arrest your family instead. This didn’t mean your friends were exactly safe from punishment as they did break in, but it did mean they got a light punishment as they did it for good reason.
Still, even after all that. Dan Hengs main concern was you, rightfully so as well. Even if it were for only just a day you were gone. He couldn’t bear to see you hurt or gone. Laying in bed, he had his arms wrapped around you, whispering sweet nothings into your ear after you explained what happened, your side personally.
Soon enough, his voice was enough to lure you into sleep, and as the land of dreams was slowly arriving, you heard Dan Heng say one last thing.
“I’ll always be with you, and I’ll always protect you.
Because I belong with you”
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I'm not too happy with how this one turned out but I hope this was enjoyable sob. I wasn't sure if what I written would fit in the HSR timeline or is more modern AU. Hence, "Modern-ish" if you have a better word then feel free to tell me so I can put it in ^^
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daddypriceugh · 6 months
Text
Mr. And Mrs. Mactavish
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I saw that you guys want fluff so I'm giving you fluff :)
I will maybe upload another fic today, if I don't fall asleep (it's 10:30 pm here)
Anyway enjoy this one <3
Tw: nothing just fluff
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Today is the day you've never thought would come. It just always seemed unreal. But here you are, standing in your wedding dress in front of the church door waiting for the music to announce your entrance.
Your nerves are playing wild and your body feels on fire. What if you trip? What if he changes his mind? What if-
"Are you alright?"
A voice interrupts your thoughts. You look to your left to see John Price standing next to you, with a worried look on his face.
" Yeah I'm fine. Just nervous"
He nods in understanding and takes your hands in his.
"Trust me it's gonna be okay. Hell don't worry about him changing his mind, I've never seen someone that wipped for a girl before"  he says while laughing at the last part.
A chuckle escapes your throat, which then tightens again when you heard the music start playing.
"Ok ok no panic (Y/N)" you tell yourself, trying to calm down.
You take a deep breath and nod at John, giving your ok to enter the church. He smiles at you and links his arm with yours.
You tear up at the gesture, knowing that your father would have loved to walk you down the aisle.
John had become like a father figure to you -even though he's not that much older- and you're more than grateful that he said yes to walking you into your new chapter of life.
The heavy doors open and you can see the guests standing up at the sound, all of them turning their heads to see the bride.
You take one step after another, gripping John's hand in yours. Looking around you see familiar faces like your mother and some aunts, but the most important person to you was standing at the altar.
Turning your head you lock eyes with him. Time seems to slow down as you take i the sight of him. Damn does he looks handsome. His mohawk was freshly cut and he wore a new black suit with a red tie.
It may look like a unoriginal outfit, but to you it is perfect.
A smiles forms on your face when you stand directly in front of him. John hands him your hand over and shoots a threatening look. It was the "if you ever hurt her I will personally kill you" look.
Before leaving to go to Johnny's man in honor side to stand next to Gaz and Ghost, he gives you a small kiss on your forehead, whispering "I'm proud of you" against it.
Now it was just Johnny and you. Two people that love each other more than words can describe.
The pastor says the usual things but you hear nothing. You just stare into your soon-to-be-husbands eyes, and you could swear to see tears swelling in them.
The pastor speaks up.
"It is now time for the vows"
You take a deep breath and start talking:
"Johnny, I have loved you since the moment I saw you. It was the way you introduced yourself, the way you saved my ass on many missions, it was the way you held me after my father died and it were the many things in-between. You made and still make my life perfect. I finally found a reason to life and I'm glad I get to spend the time with you. You are perfect in any way imaginable. I love you dearly and I will stay by your side in good and bad times"
Your voice cracks midway, tears streaming down your face. But it seems that your fiancé feels the same way. He doesn't hide his emotions anymore embraces the tears.
It was no his turn and he grabs your right hand and puts it on his heart.
"Dearie, you absolutely make me the happiest man alive. I'm blessed to wake up with you next to me evey day. I can't think of something better anymore. I love the way you laugh at all my stupid jokes that I tell the Lieutenant. It seems that his skull is too thick to understand our humour"
Laughter goes through the room, even Simon chuckles at the mentioning of his name.
"I love everything about you and that will never stop. Even after my death. I love you from the bottom of my heart."
You smile at him and place your hand on his cheek.
The pastor raises his hands and announces the moments you have been waiting for.
"I now announce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride"
Not waiting a second longer, Johnny pulls you by your waist and presses his lips to yours. Applause rings through the crowd and people cheer.
The kiss doesn't last long but it's perfect. Johnny then suddenly lifts you up and carries you towards the exit, and your friends and family follow.
Time skip:
The evening goes smooth. People are laughing and having fun. You are currently sitting on your husbands lap after having danced to two songs.
Head laying on his shoulder while you're admiring him, tracing every scar with your thumb.
"And how does it feel to be married"
"Feels incredible my darlin'. Absolutely the best feeling ever" You hum in response looking up to him. He catches your stare and smiles.
"I hope you won't grow tired of me Mr. Mactavish"
"I would never in my life. I promise you that Mrs. Mactavish"
You laugh and move you face to his to meet in a kiss. This time it's more passionate, full of love and excitement for what the future holds.
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pinkomcranger · 2 months
Text
my thoughts on Saga Anderson and the lack of spotlight on her in fanworks
Hmmm…this has been bothering me since I waded into the fandom after AW2 dropped. WHY DOES 99.9% OF THE FANDOM SLEEP ON SAGA WHILE IT'S HALF HER GAME???
I DON'T understand the fixation on Casey (even though I adore him and he's the other half of my OTP), or Zane to the point that when Saga is in ensemble art, she's relegated to being the "bro". And for what purpose? She has just as much build up and storyline as Alan himself. She certainly has more screen time than FBI Casey. I see posts going "oh, I love Saga so much, she was so badass" and then almost nothing when it comes to fan work.
Do y'all understand, how, as a black woman, this frustrates me to NO end? I go to her tag on AO3, see new fics, get excited...just to see she's the bro or footnote to CaseyWake. I've literally been brought to TEARS over this. Saga was written with SO much love and care, and it's so obvious. She was not the stereotypical sassy, angry, loud black woman that we tend to get when we're even thought of at all.
And it's genuinely PAINFUL to see all of the love, all of that care, ALL OF THAT RESPECT, IGNORED by fandom because you want to focus on the white men. Because why? I get it, het is so icky for most of you, fine. But to not even give her fanart/fics just on her and her daughter? It's terribly egregious.
Saga Anderson is genuinely a role model. She's smart, warm, funny, dedicated, sympathetic and passionate. She will change REALITY just to save the ones she loves. She's NEVER had to deal with anything like the Bright Falls situation and she came through it with such GRACE. She saved the fucking day. She did what Alan couldn't do in THIRTEEN YEARS. And she gets no recognizance in fanworks?
And I know the majority of this fandom happens to be made up of women, at least for fanworks. You truly mean to tell me you can't, at all, even a little bit, relate to this woman? You can't make her the focus, instead of a background character? The white men are easier to understand and draw/write for?
I can't tell anyone who to like, or who to ship, nor would I ever try to, because on the internet, it seems like het is icky despite how amazing the woman is. But I've seen comments towards andercase fanart going "Saga, no, you're married!" But shipping CaseyWake in the same breath, despite Alan being married and getting back to his wife being the main motivation for Alan to do anything at all.
It comes off as hypocritical, it comes off a wee bit "I don't know what to do with this black woman...hmm, let's just make her root for CaseyWake" I'm left feeling that Sam and the team love Saga more than the fans ever do or will. And that fucking sucks. Because to put so much thought into a character and love the character, just to be ignored?
That hurts, really really badly. I genuinely enjoyed feeling like I was represented. I loved having a character I could relate to, one I could understand. But it feels like I'm in the minority. When she tells Alan he's not alone in this, this is THEIR story...well, that was the truth for me, and I wish others felt the same way.
I genuinely adore the works Saga has gotten that focus on her, and I see so much love and care put into them. It just somehow feels like fandom made this game into CaseyWake 24/7 and it's icky.
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sarahmysweetie · 11 months
Note
Can I request a rafe fic with a young single mum? Maybe when they first meet, love at first sight and he finds out she has a kid? Something cute? Maybe she’s nervous of how he’ll react
Thank you! (Also. If you don’t want to write it it’s fine!)
Come and get your love
Rafe Cameron x reader
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Hii thank you so much for the request<33 i hope you like thiss
Summary: Rafe asks reader out on a date, but she doesn't tell him about her having a son. What happens when Rafe finds out?
No warnings i think, extremly fluffy<33
I lift drinks on my tray and wipe my forehead with my free hand. It gets really hot working at The Wreck. I'm not complaining though, because i need this money. The Carreras were very kind to hire me.
"To table three", Anna Carrera tells me and walks to another table. Come and get your love by Redbone is playing. Cause you're mine, and you're fine and you, look so divine. I put on my customer service smile and turn around towards table three. As i turn around, i bump into something. The tray swings all the drinks on me. I yelp as the cold liquid drenches me.
"I'm so sorry", the something says.
"No no, i am so sorry", i ramble and lift my gaze. A tall man with a buzzed hair. It's Rafe Cameron. Now, i don't actually know him know him, but everybody knows the Camerons.
"I am really sorry sir, i should be more careful", i say. "Nah don't worry are you okay?", he looks at me straight in the eyes. Something flips inside my stomach. Come and get your love... I quickly look away.
"Um yeah i'm okay. S-sorry again", i disappear into the kitchen. I try to wipe my clothes, but there is no saving them. I groan and go change. I spend rest of the evening serving tables, avoiding Rafe's eyes. I'm so embarrassed. I awkwardly look at the ground when i serve Ward and Rafe's table.
My shift is almost over. I quit early today, cause i have an opening shift tomorrow. I go clear the last tables before i leave. When i go clear the table were the Cameron's sat at, i see a napkin with black writing on it. Date at 9pm? Meet me here. I lift my gaze, hoping that he didn't leave yet. I spin my head around and see him walking out the door after Ward. Rafe turns to look at me, smiling. I look at the napkin. Then at him. I nod.
I smile the whole walk back home from work. Now, i know that people have many opinions about Rafe Cameron. But, no one has asked me on a date in ages, and i don't judge people before getting to know them. I open the door to my house. I remove my shoes and that's when i hear small steps running towards me. I smile and open my arms.
"Mommy!" my 3 year old son exclaims and clings on to me.
"Hii sweetie, mommy missed you so much", i smile and hug my son. The babysitter walks from the kitchen.
"Hi y/n, how was work?" she asks me.
"Ugh terrible, the heat is killing me. Thank you for watching Leo again Vanessa", i give her a tired smile. Then i remember. I walk to Vanessa so that my son wouldn't hear. I don't want him asking what's a date, with who, who is that, why, why. why. Toddlers ask so many questions. He runs back to the living room, probably to get his toy.
"I got asked on a date today", i whisper to Vanessa.
"Oh my god by who!" she asks, excited.
"It was Rafe Cameron", i say. "You mean Ward Camerons son?" Vanessa asks, her eyes wide. I nod.
"And i hate to ask you this, but could you watch Leo for the night? Of course i'll pay you extra", i ask her.
"Of course i will. You go have fun, you deserve it."
I meet Rafe at the door of my workplace.
"You came", he smiles when i arrive.
"Someone asks me out, of course i show up", i smile back at him. He is wearing a casual white button up. I'm wearing a red flowy dress.
"So, where are we going?" i ask. Rafe grins in a way that makes my stomach flip.
"Well i wondered that you probably don't wanna have dinner at your workplace."
"Yeah not really", i laugh. Rafe's face is illuminated by the yellow light of the lamp post above us.
"Get in then", he says and pulls his car keys out of his pocket. I follow him to his nice looking car. He turns to look at me when he opens the door of the passenger's side for me.
"I promise to not like, drive you out of town and murder you or something", he smirks as i get in his car. I laugh and shut the door and in a second he has gone around the car and sits behind the wheel. I smile as i put on the seatbelt.
"So you'll murder me in town?" i joke. It makes him laugh. I need to bite my lip to not smile like a 12 year old girl with a crush.
We talk and laugh the whole short drive to the restaurant. There is not a one awkward silence. We get to the restaurant, order our foods and then start eating. We both ordered a steak. Suddenly Rafe lifts his gaze.
"Oh i didn't even ask, how old are you?"
"I'm 20", i answer. How did we forget to talk about our ages? Funny.
"Same", he answers before i get to ask. Well, i already knew his age. I get lost in my thoughts for a second, but i hear him ask something.
"Sorry what?" i didn't hear Rafe.
"Your family. Do you live alone?", he looks at me.
"Yeah i live alone", i answer before i even get to think. The lie just slips out of my mouth. I feel bad immediately. I'm just afraid that he won't be interested in me after he finds out i have a son. Young mothers aren't the jackpot in the dating world.
"What about you?", i ask him, trying to hide my thoughts.
"I live in my family's house, but they are living at our summerhouse right now. Well, my dad just came back, as you saw", he answers.
"Did you like being alone, or did you miss the noise", i ask and smile.
"It is nice to be by myself, not having anyone around to tell me what to do and what to not do", he smiles.
"Yeah, i remember when i first moved to my own place, i missed the noise of my family's house. You know, my siblings", i tell him.
"Yeah i get that. I don't have the best relationship with my dad, so it was nice to have some space", Rafe says and his eyes darken and smile dies.
"Oh i'm sorry i didn't mean to bring up anything", i reach and touch his arm comfortingly. He looks at my hand on his arm, and i feel my cheeks go red. I take my hand off and place it on my lap.
"No it's fine, you didn't do anything", Rafe assures me.
"I just feel like i could tell you anything", he continues. Could i tell you anything? Could i tell you that i'm a mother?
"I guess some people just have that kind of aura", i say, trying to hide my growing feelings. We chat for the rest of the dinner, sometimes talking deep and sometimes laughing so hard my stomach hurts. When it's time to pay the bill, Rafe takes his wallet out. I grab my wallet too, already scared of the price.
"No no no, i got it", he says and grabs his credit card.
"I'm the one who took you here", he smiles. I smile and thank him, being eased by the fact that i still got money for diapers.
"So...", Rafe says while we stand in front of the restaurant.
"I would hate for this to be the last time i see you", he says. I look at his face, his eyes locked to mine, his lips turned up into a smile. I can't believe this is happening. He wants to see me again.
"So. Is it?" he asks. He looks down at his hands, fidgeting with his ring. He is nervous. I suddenly realize that. This is the opposite of him asking me out confidently with the paper note. He is scared that i reject him. Rafe lifts his gaze up, to see me smiling.
"It isn't. I would love to see you again", i tell him. Immediately his face lightens up. I can almost imagine his heart slowing down to normal tempo again. For a second we stand still, not knowing what to do.
"I can drive you home", Rafe says and points to his car with his thumb. Oh no, what if he wants to walk me to the door, what if Leo isn't asleep, what if he runs to the door, Rafe will find out. My heart starts pounding.
"No no, it's in the opposite direction and very close", i assure him quickly.
"I don't mind if it's in the wrong direct-"
"I'll sleep better if i walk." I try to smile at him, begging that he drops this. I know that he is just trying to be nice. "
Okay", Rafe says, not wanting to push me. For a second we stand still, not knowing what to do. I don't know how people end dates! Then Rafe opens his arms slightly and steps closer. I get what he is trying and hug him. It is a little hard to find a comfortable position, because Rafe is so much taller than me. He kind of leans down slightly, so that my head goes over his shoulder, not smashing against his chest.
"Thank you for the company", i say softly and pat his back slightly before we pull away from the hug.
"Thank you", Rafe smiles. I smile back.
"So, i better get going", i breathe out.
"Wait", Rafe grabs my hand gently. I wait for him to say something.
"Can i kiss you?" he asks, still holding my hand. My lips turn in to a smile and i nod. Rafe pulls me closer, leans in and kisses me. He holds my cheek gently, and i lift my hand to touch his jaw. The kiss is soft and sweet. It doesn't feel weird or unnatural. When we pull off, we realise that we don't have eachothers numbers. We switch contacts, and after assuring Rafe that i'm sure about walking home, we say goodbye.
Needless to say, i smiled like crazy the whole walk home.
I'm sitting on a park bench, watching my son play in the sandbox. There is other moms too, watching and guarding their children. It's been 3 weeks since my first date with Rafe. After that, we have seen regularly. We have chatted, had long phone calls, dinners, or just late night walks. But there is two kinds of nights. The ones when i fall asleep smiling, thinking about him. And the ones when i fall asleep crying, thinking about him. I still haven't told him. I haven't told Rafe about my son. My son, who makes me so happy. But, the more days passed by, the harder it got to tell him the truth. I'm just too scared. Too scared of his reaction, if he doesn't want to see someone who has a child. I don't want to lose him. But i do realize that i have to tell him at some point. I just really, really don't know how. Suddenly i snap back to reality by a voice.
"Hey y/n!" I look up. It's Rafe. It's him. He sits down next to me on the bench.
"Hi Rafe", i say, not knowing what to do.
"I was just walking by and then i saw you", he smiles. My heart breaks. He is so happy to see me. What about when he finds out i'm a liar? Maybe he is in a hurry, maybe he leaves soon, maybe i don't need to tell him today.
"You babysitting?" Rafe points with his head to the kids playing. I don't get to answer. I probably wouldn't had an answer anyways.
"Mommy it broke!" My heart sinks to my stomach. My son is at the sandbox, his toycar's wheel has come off. I don't dare to look at Rafe. I almost feel tears forming in my eyes, but my face stays blank as I stand up and walk to help my son. I can't see it, but i can feel Rafe's look. I can feel him watching me crouch down and fix my son's toy.
"Here you go sweetie", i whisper to my son who happily takes the toy from my hand. He immediately goes back to his playing. I stand up. I don't dare to turn around, or walk back to Rafe. I don't want to see the look on his face. I bite the inside of my cheek, and finally turn around. I walk back to the bench and sit down, never looking at Rafe. I feel a single tear run down my cheek, but i don't lift my hand to wipe it.
"You have a kid?" i hear Rafe say. His voice triggers the stream of tears. I stand up quickly and walk towards my son, frantically wiping the tears as they fall.
"Okay Leo, let's go home", i try to say, but it sounds more like choking. Tears wet my cheeks. I lift my hand so that my son would hold it, so that we could get home. He sits at the sandbox, holding his car, with a confused look on his little face. He doesn't understand what's wrong with his mommy. Then Rafe rushes after me, grabbing my arm.
'"No, please y/n let's talk", Rafe begs me. I finally turn to look at him. There is no betrayal on his face. No disgust of me being a huge liar. No sudden distance. He looks scared. Worried. Caring. I try to look away, and I try to say something, but no words get out of my mouth. Only frantic and panicky sobs and breathes get through.
"Shh it's okay breathe", Rafe says. Now i notice his hands on my shoulders.
"Come here, let's talk", Rafe says quietly, almost whispering.
"Everything is okay sweetie, just play with your car", i tell my son, squeezing the words through the hand that i've pressed over my mouth. I don't want Leo to see me cry panickly, i wan't him to feel like everything is just fine. Rafe guides me back to the bench and sits next to me. I see my son looking confused, but slowly getting back to playing with his car. Rafe waits till i've calmed down. When my breathing eases and the tears stop rolling, he opens his mouth.
"How old is he?"
"Three", i answer steadying my breathing.
"Why didn't you tell me that you have a son", Rafe asks. I turn to look at him. His brows are slightly furrowed, but he still isn't mad. I turn my head straight again.
"At our first date i... i was too scared to tell you. No one wants young mothers. So i just... didn't tell you. I meant to. I really did. But the more time passed, the more difficult it became to actually tell you. I liked you so much, and i didn't want you to loose interest in me", i speak, and he let's me. Rafe doesn't interrupt me, he just sits and listens to me.
"And i understand if you never want to see me again, cause i'm a liar and- and-" but then he stops me.
"Y/n stop." I stop and turn to look at him. I can see Rafe taking a deep breath.
"So you had him when you were... 17?", he counts in his head. I nod. He keeps asking questions. Why isn't he yelling at me?
"Is his father around?", he asks. I turn to look at him again.
"Definitely not. We met at a party. Didn't really know him well, and i was pressured by the fact that 'everyone is doing it so i have to do it too'. So, it definitely wasn't love. I told him i got pregnant though. I remember, he looked at me like it was weird that i would tell him. He didn't want anything to do with the baby, and i never met or even saw him again. I heard he became a drug addict and overdosed. So... not around. My family was supportive though, so i wasn't alone", i explain to him.
"I'm sorry that he didn't want anything to do with it", Rafe says.
"I'm not. We are better off without him", i smile sadly. He looks at me then looks at Leo.
"I'm so sorry Rafe", i whisper, fighting tears again. Rafe shakes his head a little.
"You know i'm falling in love with you right?", he suddenly says. I turn my head and meet his beautiful eyes.
"W-what?"
"I've been happier than ever in my life these last weeks. I was gonna ask you to be my girlfriend", Rafe's eyes never leave mine. Wait what? I try to swallow a lump in my throat.
"Is the offer still on the table?" my heart skips beats. I've never been so scared before. The second feels like hours. Then his lips turn into a smile.
"Of course it is", he takes a hold of my hand.
"So you forgive me?" He nods and sqeezes my hand.
"And obviously i want to be your girlfriend", i finally smile. He smiles too, before he pulls me in for a hug. I bury my head in his shoulder and neck.
"It takes a bit of digesting, just to get used to it", he says when we break away. He sees my startled face and then quickly adds:
"No i don't mean it like that. I will get used to it. You having a son definitely isn't a dealbreaker." I smile with my heart full of relief.
"Can i meet him?" he suddenly ask.
"Sure", i answer and stand up. Why am i nervous? Rafe walks behind me as i get to the sandbox.
"Hi sweetie, this is um... mommy's friend", i smile and Rafe grins at me. He crouches down to Leo's level.
"Hi i'm Rafe", he smiles at my son. Leo hides his face behind his toycar.
"He is a little shy when meeting new people", i whisper to Rafe's ear.
"What do we say?" i crouch down and whisper to my son, tickling his cheek.
"Am Leo", he says and smiles shyly.
"Do you want ice cream Leo?" Rafe asks him smiling sweetly.
"If that's okay with mommy", he continues and looks at me. I nod and smile, looking at him talking to my son. Leo nods, now a little less shy.
"Okay let's go", Rafe stands up. Leo gets up and starts following Rafe. Rafe digs his wallet from his pocket and walks slowly, watching that Leo keeps up. I stand still, forgetting myself. I feel so happy, seeing how well Leo gets along with Rafe. And how well Rafe took the news.
"Mommy?" i snap back to reality and my eyes focus again. Leo has stopped and turned to look at me. Rafe waits by his side, looking at me with a smile on his face.
"I'm coming", i smile. My legs start working again as i walk to my favorite people.
A/n: Lemme know if u want a part 2, maybe a year later fic?
387 notes · View notes
hhhhunty · 12 days
Note
been thinking nonstop about the asl brothers and would love to hear you yap about them
Ouhhh the ASL bros.... apologies in advance for how Luffy-heavy this is.
They are very important to me... Luffy's my favorite character and so of course I am made weak by his brothers. They're so incredibly tragic that it pains me to think about them. Did you ever think about the fact that Sabo and Luffy are the two who know each other the least? Sabo and Ace had at least three years before Sabo disappeared, and Ace and Luffy had seven years together before Ace set out, but Luffy and Sabo only knew each other through Ace for less than a year, twelve years ago. They're probably weird without the context of Ace in between them.
This of course isn't to say their bond isn't strong or they don't love each other as much, but being near each other must cause such an ache for their third brother given they were never around each other without Ace there... kind of like when Sabo "died" and Luffy and Ace kept talking to him anyways before getting embarrassed and upset as soon as they remembered Sabo's not here anymore.
Urghh I also think the beginning of Luffy's relationship with Ace is the blueprint for Luffy trying to befriend anyone, and probably the proof to him (though he already knew it) that he could get anyone in his corner if he was just persistent. This is an attitude he keeps throughout all his adventures and everyone he meets, from his "I refuse your refusal!" to Sanji to his consistent pestering of Law...
Ace is just a whole mess of his own... he changed so drastically and even learned manners for Luffy in order to thank Shanks for saving him (something something changing for the better because of someone you love). This completely changed his interactions with others, I think. I love whenever there are nods in comics or fics to Ace being remembered by Luffy's crew as this polite guy, and when Sabo hears of this he's just hopelessly confused and probably a little sad, too, that he missed such a change in his brother and never had the chance to meet him like that.
Back to Luffy though because I'm insane... Ace is such a good meter for Luffy's growth... I recently saw someone commenting on the way that Luffy speaks of Ace throughout post timeskip, from feeling so guilty meeting Sabo at Dressrosa to smiling when Marco told him Ace would be proud of him in Wano... I think a lot of that came from seeing Sabo, and knowing he had another brother alive. I think to Luffy, Sabo is the authority on Ace to some extent. That Sabo was simply happy Luffy was alive and wasn't upset at him for failing Ace was big for Luffy and he kind of took that to heart - it helped him really believe it... maybe that in a way caused him to be able to talk freely about Ace by the time he reached Wano...
Ughh this is all so disjointed and jumbled and I may think of more later but this has been my yapping for now.
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here is a doodle :)
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