#i don’t want to go home and feel like i’m walking on eggshell whenever i speak
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Satan if you were a satanist before you arrived in the devildom
A/n: listennnn in between getting dragged by the Lucifer chat bots, writing two really long fics and having brain worms about this Au I’ve had so many thoughts and Satan has landed in my radar☺️ asmo and Simon are NEXT bc guardian angels are a whole DIFFERENT can of worms
I’m gunna use like ACTUAL satanic lore mixed in w the game lore
Satan:
- okay so boom
- Right off the bat he can tell you are different
- Sitting back waiting to see how you react to everyone
- Takes note you’re much more respectful to him than the rest
- Thought you were walking on eggshells because you were terrified of him but you ain’t scared at all
- You see through all his pranks
- “He’ll probably see that coming a mile away. Try moving it over here Lucifer don’t check there.”
- Color him impressed
- Does see you don’t really freak out like his brothers when he goes into one of his little rage fits
- When he offered to make the pact with you to piss Lucifer off you were really caught at a pass
- Like for one you technically already have a soft pact with him being a devotee
- But also you don’t want to disrespect him by saying no
- Choosing to not get on Lucifer’s bad side because you still do have a mission to do in that attic, soyou politely decline
- “I’m sorry, but I’m not going to make a pact with you that isn’t built on a mutual trust and understanding”
- He’s always told you to sniff out a trap and you were NOT falling for it
- Blinded by rage for not getting his way, that’s when he lashes out
- He feels something weird in his chest when he looks at you in that moment but he can’t quite understand it. Like a tugging feeling at the back of his head trying to tell him something
- When you get caught I. The middle of the whole “they’re the same person thing” you just roll your eyes
- “No shit they’re not the same person🙄😒 Satan and Lucifer couldn’t be more different, Lucifer is the morning star and Satan is more tricker than anything :/ crazy how yall don’t do research”
- Ngl he almost fell for you right then and there
- He cannot STAND that especially when humans call anything and everything Satan and refer to him and Lucifer like they’re the same person.
- Looks at you with star eyes for a second before sticking to you like glue. He’s very fascinated with you and wants to study you under a microscope
- Ask you if you’re like Solomon and have been studying for years
- Did you manage to get your hands on some devildom textbook somehow?
- Maybe even some texts form the celestial realm
- “Not really but that would be super cool to read.”
- He himself hates misinformation so you be correcting all the demon brothers with the quickness
- Lucifer is very annoyed and Satan is elated
- Notices you looking at him a lot, like you’re analyzing him
- Ofc he’s blunt and isn’t gunna beat around the bush he asks you what you’re doing starring at him like that
- “It’s really nice to see what you actually look like… if you’re shape shifting all the time and this is the form you stay in full time it’s… nice to see you face to face”
- Confused for a second because he doesn’t often make trips directly to the human world even for a summoning
- “Well I mean, in the human world we don’t actually know what you look like. The only book that has a description of what you looked like and are has the pages mysteriously ripped out and have never been found. I assume that was your doing?”
- Shocked pikachu bc he fr forgot he did that in his younger years
- His mischievous tendencies have been delegated directly to Lucifer, he understands the value of books now
- “Ah,,, I do recall doing that. It would make sense why you’re starring at me so hard.”
- Blushes when you call him a pretty boy
- Like he’s in his room kicking his feet giggling
- You bring him his offerings directly
- He won’t even realize you’re doing deity work with him and is just excited to spend time with you
- Whenever you come back home from class or whatever you give him little things you got in your way back or snacks he likes
- Nobody has ever seen satan smile this much
- Lucifer peeps when it’s your turn to cook dinner you just so happen to favor foods Satan likes and uses ingredients he does to cook too
- Will be very suspicious of you mirroring his behavior
- Satan is none the wiser truly he’s assure at familiar feeling is like some star crossed lovers stuff and you were meant to meet by fates hands
- Has so many cute cat themed things in his room from you
- Lucifer is not liking how you seem to be trying to gain his trust for your own reasons but he can’t sense anything malicious.
- He can’t pinpoint any alternate motive for this behavior
- Satan will not notice until someone points it out to him
- Lucy straight up asks you why you’re getting so friendly with him
- Mammon also chimes in that you seem like you’re sucking up to him, and Satan feels conflicted be he doesn’t like how they’re accusing you but also the fact that you might be just being nice to him because you want something is setting his nerves on fire
- Rolling your eyes you shoot back at Lucifer that you’re just worshiping Satan like you usually do
- The old man is takes aback and Satan is like…. I beg your pardon?😀
- “Satan has been my patron for years now, the only thing that’s different is that I can give him my offerings and ask him for help directly”
- Mammon is chewing the carpet he’s supposed to be your first man!
- Satan is flabbergasted and is searching his memory for this information
- Before he remembers
- “How did I not notice??”
- “I thought you knew??”
- “NO???”
- Dinner is wild bc now asmo asking for embarrassing memories of you
- Rip bc Satan gon tell it ALL😭
- I feel like he’d be the type to keep a log so he might not remember every single face and name because he does fuck with some people who summon him
- Grabs your notebook from his room and starts reciting shit BAR FOR BAR
- “Oh yeah i remember this! You were quite a rowdy child picking fights with everyone. Your temper was awful”
- “YOU DO NOT GET TO FUCKING SAY THAY TO ME!!”
- laughing because he’s taking a stroll down memory lane and he’s dragging you along
- Can feel your anger a mile away, he’s in your ear now more than EVER going “don’t you want to go apeshit?”
- Constantly encouraging you to loose your temper on Lucifer
- He feeds off your rage and it feels almost euphoric to him, because he’s an instigator if anything😭
- “Where the fuck is your rage?? Lucifer was definitely disrespecting you👀👀”
- Exhausting
- Lucifer will get on him about having you up for hours on end reading and studying when you need to sleep
- You will NOT fail any class not on his fucking watch! He’s gunna make sure you excel in this exchange program academically
- Even if he’s not who you ask for things he’s helping you
- “Do NOT as belphie for help with dream interpretation I’ll help you!!”
- Very proud to show you off
- “Y’all see MY human?”
- Mammon is trying not to start problems on purpose
- He will probably bend you over Lucifer’s desk bestie it’s inevitable
- If you’re intimate before he knows he’s really gentle and makes sure to take his time with you
- If it’s after he will be rough and mean
- He definitely cares about you and loves you but he will pretend he’s using you as a toy
- As if he’s your god and you’re nothing but a lowly mortal designed to be used and filled up by him
- Choking you out and breeding you for hours on end
- Will be so incredibly gentle with aftercare it’s almost like he’s a different person
- “Look at you drooling and can’t even keep your eyes focused. Pathetic. You’re too stupid to think of anything other than how I’m ruining you”
- Makes you struggle to walk every time
- Gets carried away and marks you everywhere like diavolo asking you why there’s a hickey on your ankle😭
- Almost buys you a collar if Lucifer didn’t stop him
- Wants you to know you belong to him and you’re his little follower
- Tells you how good you are for him and gives you a nice reward
- “You’re so good for me, so eager to please and make me happy. My human deserves a reward hm?”
- Cocky asf for no reason PLEASE humble his ass!!
- Gets off on it when you pin him down and call him pathetic
- “The great avatar of wrath Satan himself bouncing on my lap like a whore desperate to get off.”
- He’s literally turning to mush for you
- Whimpering and looking at you with teary eyes
- “P-please I need to cum I’ll do anything”
- Bites back a moan when you coo at him that he’s so pathetic needing a mortal to get off
- He can feel how mean you are and your anger through your pact and it’s making his body buzz with excitement
- Panting and wiggling his hips he’s begging you to fill him up
- Call him a good kitty and he probably won’t be able to last
- Likes when you punish him like best his ass fr leave bruises make his ass bright red!!
- He’s really just attached to you and will cause a big issue when you have to leave the devildom at the end of the year😅
#x black reader#obey me swd#obey me shall we date#obey me#obey me x reader#obey me x mc#obey me x black reader#obey me satan#satan x reader#my wrtitng#satan smut#Satan obmswd#obm satan#Satan x Reader smut#obey me smut#satan om
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Introverted
Requested by: @dallysnecklace
Genre: Angstish Fluff
Word Count: 1,223
Warnings: Rude Lars(I swear I don't hate him, he just makes a compelling villain lmao), feelings of self doubt.
Solitude is what brings me peace. I can read, listen to music. Do whatever I want, whenever I want.
Then Kirk came stumbling into my life, quite literally.
Back when we were in high school he ran into me in the library. The books I held on to went flying. He saw the Stephen King book I had in the stack. After that incident in some way or another he was always by my side. I was annoyed at first, but the dork wormed his way into my life. Now, years later, not only is he my best friend, I’m totally in love with him. Am I still about as awkward as the first day we met? Absolutely. But for some reason he still sticks by me, even now as he’s living out his dreams of being a rockstar.
Kirk and I were walking to a bookstore, we were in a comfortable silence.
“I like you,” he started, “like a lot. I want to be more than friends.” He continued. My heart was hammering in my chest. I couldn’t think straight. I immediately stopped and turned around.
“Hey, wait! Where are you going?” I could faintly hear him ask as the blood pulsated in my veins. I didn’t stop. Not until I found myself in my apartment. I leaned against the door. I finally let myself catch my breath and process what he said. I’ve liked Kirk forever. And I probably just ruined that opportunity simply by malfunctioning when he told me he likes me.
I jumped letting out a small scream when there was a knock on my door. I held my hand over my heart and opened the door.
“Can we please talk about what just happened.” Kirk asked out of breath. His eyes were wide with worry, scared he’d said or done the wrong thing.
“I’m sorry I speed walked away.” I whispered. He laughed breathlessly.
“I like you too.” I whispered. His eyebrows perked up.
“What was that?” He asked, “I couldn’t hear you.”
“I like you too.” I said again, this time a little louder. A goofy grin spread across his lips.
“Not gonna run away again?” He asked. I shook my head.
Kirk, I came to find out was the best person I could possibly date. He was patient and kind, but he helped me push my boundaries. I became more confident in myself. I mean, at the core I was still me, just with some more pep in my step. I knew I had Kirk to rely on, and he could always rely on me.
I went to the Metallimansion to hang out with Kirk. I quietly entered the house. I went to take off my shoes when I heard Lars talking.
“I just don’t get what he sees in her.”
“It’s not up to you to decide what he does or doesn’t see in her.” I heard Cliff respond. This could be about anybody.
“She’s just so mousy and can hardly maintain eye contact. She gets flustered so easily it’s like walking on eggshells, Y/N is just so annoying.” Lars complained. Okay not about just anybody, this was definitely about me.
“Dude shut the hell up before I punch you. She’s nice, she has quirks just like the rest of us do. Stop being a dick.” Cliff defended.
Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I silently backed out and went home as fast as I could.
I knew it, it doesn’t matter how much I think I’ve changed, it's still the same. I curled up in my bed and just cried.
A while later my phone rang. I sluggishly got up and answered it before it went to voicemail.
“Hello?” I answered.
“Hey, babe. Where were you today? You were supposed to come over, I’m worried.” Kirk’s voice came over the line.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Something came up.” I lied.
“Oh. Okay, that’s fine. Could you let me know next time? I really thought something bad happened.” Kirk said.
“Yeah. Of course. Sorry.” I said in an even tone.
“Are you okay?” Kirk asked.
“Yup.” I answered. Kirk was silent for a few minutes.
“If you say so.” He sounded a little dejected.
“Well I gotta go, bye.”
“Wait, I love-“ he started but I hung up as a fresh wave of tears made their way down my face.
I curled back up in my bed going to sleep trying to forget it all.
My head was pounding, as was my front door. I groaned, getting up and answering the door. Kirk stood outside with a frustrated look on his face.
“Can I come in?” He asked. I couldn’t meet his eyes. I simply nodded and opened the door letting him in.
“Did I do something wrong?” He asked. I turned to face him, my eyes still focused on the floor. “Please look at me.” He practically begged. I took a deep breath finally looking up. Kirk looked really upset. It’s all my fault. It would be easier if I wasn’t a burden to him.
“What’s going on? Why are you pulling away? Please don’t lie to me and say everything is okay.” He said to me, my bottom lip wobbled.
“I heard Lars talking about me to Cliff. It just reminded me you’re way out of my league and it’s best I just hang out by myself.” I said, wringing my hands together. Kirk reached out to still my hands.
“That’s not true.” Kirk said sternly, “you’re so amazing, funny, and kind. I love you just the way you are. Have I enjoyed seeing you more confident in yourself? Absolutely, it means you’re starting to see yourself the way I see you.” He said, fresh tears filled my eyes. Kirk brought his fingers up and started wiping away my tears.
“I’m sorry.” I said.
“You have nothing to be sorry for. Lars was being a dick with whatever he said. Cliff too.” Kirk replied.
“No, not Cliff. He defended me.” I said. Kirk smiled.
“I’m glad. Wanna go cuddle while I tell you all the things I love about you?” Kirk asked softly.
“Cuddle yes, but if you start complimenting me I might combust.” I said, Kirk laughed as he interlocked our fingers dragging me to the couch. He laid down and pulled me on top of him holding me close.
“Any time you start to feel that way, please don’t pull away. Come to me and I’ll give you so many reasons why I love you and think you’re absolutely incredible.” He said, rubbing my back softly. “Oh and I’m kicking Lars ass, no ifs ands or buts.” Kirk said.
“Cliff may have beat you to it, I didn’t stay long enough to hear fists fly.” I said softly. Kirk chuckled.
“Glad I can rely on Cliff to have your back.” Kirk said.
“Me too. He’s a good friend.” I said.
“You consider him a friend?” Kirk asked, he sounded excited. I nodded. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you for weaseling your way into my life. I love you.” I said.
“I love you.” He said, kissing my forehead.
I smiled nuzzling into his warmth. I would be forever grateful for Kirk who came stumbling into my life and stayed, showing me there was more than just books and solitude.
Thank you for reading! Feel free to request or chat :)
-Isa
#metallica x reader#metallica#metallica imagines#metallica scenarios#kirk hammett x reader#kirk hammett#metallica fluff#kirk hammett fluff
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Make some space, it's my time to shiiiine [surpirseeeee]
[“Consent,” her mother laughs. “Layla, your grandparents didn’t ask me for my consent..."] So? You could've ended it now? I understand we always think we'll never become like our parents, but we ultimately do. But still, you could put an end to it mama.
[She had sat down to start blocking off colours for her biggest commission yet, when her phone buzzed rhythmically with her mother’s picture taking up the screen] naurrrr, not her mum being a creative flow block.
[“Layla, watch your mouth. I’ll have you back home on the next flight. I blame Vasanth and Abi, they always let you do and say whatever and never control you.”] no she did not just say that
[“Do you remember that night? When we were living alone? When you found me in the kitchen with a kn-“ her mother stops, and Layla hears her shuffling and a door closing. “Do you remember how much you cried?”] ...oh no..oh no no no
[“No,” she says softly, slumping onto the swing. Feeling herself being pulled into a familiar feeling. ] my baby i've honestly never this seething rage for anyone but her mum.
[“I sacrificed so much for you. To make sure you had a better life. Do you think I wanted to do that? No. But I did to give you a ‘better life.’ Getting you married is my final duty and once that’s done I will be free. Have I ever discouraged you from your studies?”
“No.”] I know exactly where this is going and I'm not excited for it.
[“So listen to me when I tell you this. You will be getting married whenever and to whoever I say so. You will drop everything that the boy’s family does not like; that includes your studies. If they encourage your PhD pursuit, that’s great for you. If they want you to stay at home and take care of your children that is what you will do. Because your husband will be in control of you and then I will finally relax because you will have a better life.” She finishes.
“But what if I don’t want to get married.”
Her mother laughs mockingly from the other end. “Why would you not want to get married? You know better than to have a boyfrie-“
Fuck me in the ass! She thinks.
”Do you?” Her mother growls.
“No.” She answers quickly. “Of course not. Where would I even find one? It’s not like you let me go out alone back home,” she forces a chuckle, hoping the joke is enough to distract her.
“Good. You know better. I will not hesitate to poison your food if you bring shame to me.”
Layla remains quiet, eyes scanning the eggshell carpet as she draws patterns with her feet.
“I’ve gotta go. I’m feeling sleepy. It’s almost ten at night here.”
“Okay. Goodnight.”]
[Her mother laughs. “Only you’d go to temples for food!”] nah, her better lover does too *wink wink*
////
[It was one of her favourite places to come and watch the people on the street. She would then turn off her PlayStation when her eyes felt like they were going to melt and she’d find herself here.] omg I've a line vv similar to this one in my wip!! the vibes, the feels these lines give>>
[Usually the egg shaped swing would sway to and fro from the window. The swing room sat at the centre of the top floor and had a window that opened right up to the street. It was one of her favourite places to come and watch the people on the street. She would then turn off her PlayStation when her eyes felt like they were going to melt and she’d find herself here. She’d watched countless things from that spot of hers, sketchbook wide open - abandoned - on her lap as she clamps her teeth around the end of the pencil. Nandhini Aunty going on her evening walks for her blood pressure chattering away into the white wire of her headphones that would disappear into the brown crossbody purse of hers. Chandru Uncle biting into a sugary concoction and stuffing his box of sweets into the dashboard of the car before heading into the house. A couple of the neighbour kids rollerblading with hockey sticks, trying to get the small ball into their opponents nets. And sometimes, Harry tripping over air when he goes for his morning runs; it always made her giggle at his two left feet. ] I read this para like 5 times, it's just so beautiful. I absolutely adore this feeling irl too.
[But right now, the fluorescent white street light doesn’t seem to draw her attention to what’s happening on the streets. She can hear her neighbour’s dog bark but it seems distant and muted. All she could do right now was clutch the plush dolphin to her chest as she stared at the carpet. The scent of turpentine permeates through the room from her unattended art project. Any sensible person who knows their way around oil paints and knows that they should open up the window but she doesn’t seem to care. A giant boulder weighed heavily on her chest - anchoring her to her feelings.
She feels funny. Funny bad. Funny anxious. She hadn’t felt anxious for weeks now. Layla maintained a regimen: walks with Harry by the lake, low intensity workouts and her hour long yoga, oiling her hair, cooking, taking a hot shower, helping Earl with his flower arrangements, and drawing in her sketchbook. All these helped; they still do. But every time she feels like she’s finally gotten past her anxiety, an ivy wraps around the boulder, making it impossible to touch. Layla chuckles weakly as she closes her eyes and tries to picture the boulder, or her boulder. She wound up reading Payne’s book introducing Narrative Therapy in the library during her final semester and she figured it was worth a shot to try and externalise her anxiety. Was it not the smartest move to not do it with a professional? Probably but she did it anyway. She created this persona of the boulder for her anxiety. Was it the most creative one out there? Definitely not. But that is what her anxiety felt like, a massive boulder that was sitting right on her chest - sinking her. Every time she has great days and on the days where she can manage her experiences of anxiety she can’t help but think of cracks appearing on the boulder. Her time in America gave rise to a lot of these cracks. But after every setback, all she can picture are dense thorn filled ivys slithering it’s way around the boulder, making it impossible for Layla to get close. ] no one touch me. I beg, do not touch me. please, just don't.
[Layla closes her eyes and exhales loudly through her mouth. I’m not gonna sit here and worry about something that might happen in the future, she affirms herself, pushing herself off the swing.---She splashes her face with some cold water, and pats it dry with a towel. She quickly runs a brush through her hair to get rid of the knots, before bunching it up into a high ponytail. She sniffles, as she pushes her bangs in place, to look remotely put together] slay my baby *sniffles*
[“A sweater vest. My sister-in-law sent me the pattern. Been working on it for two days now.”] we love crocheting and people who crochet <3
[“Just thought you could use some relaxation before your first day of classes tomorrow, Professor Sathish,” he smiles.] ...if he doesn't do this, i don't want him.
[“So what if the rosé is?” He replies, hosting her up onto the sink counter, so he didn’t have to bend down.] you do know what you're doing to us readers, don't you?
[“But,” she continues quietly, “I buy things that are inexpensive.” And the last word is all it took from Layla for Harry to understand. She has chastised him for spending money on her in passing before but he thought it was out of politeness. He didn’t pick up on the fact that it was making her feel bad and he should have listened to her better.] nawwww
[“So? Baby, I don’t know why you continue to do this to yourself. My intent is to not make you feel like you are less than just because the things you buy cost less,” he explains. “Whenever you buy me things, I don’t think to look at the price tag. The books, scarves, that ugly snail mug,” he pinches the soft skin near her bellybutton making her smile up at him, “and even the holiday you paid for, all of it only makes my heart skip a beat because it tells me you care. So why can’t I do the same for you? I understand you need to be financially independent but is it so wrong that I want to treat my girlfriend now and then? I know you save up and make money from your paintings. I do. When I picked up the bottle all that was running in my mind was ‘will this bottle finally convince her to ditch the beer train and hop onto wine.’”] Soft music is playing in the background and we're absolutely loving it.
[Harry doesn’t press, he knows she needs to think things through before she tells him. It frustrated him initially, he was someone that needed to talk things out at the very moment but not her. He couldn’t help but take it personally when she would shut him out when she had had panic and anxiety surges but it’s easier for him now - it’s how she communicates. She needs to take some time to think things through but she always talks to him eventually. Knowing that she is willing to open up to him does alleviate the stress he undergoes during the wait. ] love that for both of them
[“Shit,” he grunts, as his shin comes in contact with the ceramic edge, and it only makes her sputter in a giggle. “Don’t have to be so mean,” he pouts, poking the crescent of her dimple.
“You don’t have to be so clumsy,” she retorts, sinking back into his chest,] lmaooo
[he cradles her head in the valley of his neck as he hums contently. His arms come to nestle her chest, pulling her into him, as much as the universe would allow him.] melts into a puddle on the floor
[“I’m anxious,” she says quietly. “Have been feeling anxious for a while now.”] same same
[“No. You are actually helping me calm down.” She kisses his neck. “Just keep holding me, yeah.”
He hums a promise, his hand comes to softly caress her cheek - fingers feathering over the apples. He can’t help but bend down to press a kiss to her temple, making her smile when the blue of his mask smears over her, and he’s quick to wipe off the remnants] I'm literally crying sweet tera by now, Maya
[“I did! She talked about her work and presented data on how rapidly the high albedo areas are shrinking and how it has already affected the ecosystem in the Arctic. She even invited me to talk to the class about my experience but I declined.”
“Why?”
“You know I can’t talk in front of an audience. Especially when I’m not prepared. Plus, what would they have benefited from a lowly intern’s experience?”] Yoooooo please tell me he isn't saying that!!
[“Exactly! It’s not like it was easy to get the internships in the first place. Don’t put yourself down like that, Harry,” she says firmly.
“Thanks,” he bends to kiss her soft lips. “I love you, you know that.”
“I do, my favourite idiot in the world.” Layla tangles her fingers in his locks and guides him back for another one. “Now tell me what albedo means.”] i love them so much :((
[“Touché,” he agrees, conversations like these made him burst at the seams, he had never had this with anyone before. Having someone ask him questions about things he was passionate about, and actively engaging with it rather than dismissing it as a possible career opportunity, was something he had come to realise had the same effect on him as foreplay. He loved that he could pick her brain, he loved it when she would pick his, and most importantly he was absolutely besotted over the fact that she was sharp as a tack.] Mayaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa stopppp!!!!
[“Oh get this, Dr. Bailey knows the head of the earth science department at UCSD. Said she’d be more than happy to send over a recommendation email.”] holy shit
[She picks up on the grape, lots of fruits - berries, pears - but there’s also a whisper of something floral, like the smoke fading out of a candle that was blown out. But there’s also the sizzle of citrus with a hint of something woody. The effervescent liquid has a velvety softness to it as she gulps it down. ] okay now that's a ...description
[Harry laughs. “I’m gonna take full credit for your taste buds maturing. Honestly your choice of alcohol is one of a fifteen year old sneaking the cheapest one they could find at a gas station.”
“Don’t be an asshole. I’m a simple girl, what can I say?” She shrugs, pouring another glass for the two of them. ] 😂😂😂
[But one mystery he experiences is the way every sinew, every cell in his body seem to sizzle and go lax in her presence. It was confounding how she - a person who he did not know existed until a couple months ago - was able to elicit such contradictory responses from his body without so much as sparing a glance in his direction. And that is one mystery he thinks he does not want to decipher, but he would happily be an ignorant fool and ride along the waves for as long as he can.] 'as long as he can' Okay. Okay. thank you. mhm.
[“I’m sorry for giving you a hard time when you buy me things. I know you never do it to make me feel less than. It’s just- it’s just that I don’t want to think you have to get me these expensive things, take me to fancy restaurants to show me you care. Every second you spend with me is enough. You always make me feel loved. Like this bath today. It’s helped me so much. It’s just that I feel like I have to match you sometimes. It feels like you’re always taking care of me and you seem to do everything right. Sometimes I can’t help but think I don’t do the same for you and I don’t want to be a burden. I’ve been made to feel like that a lot,” she tells him quietly, voice as delicate as the wing of a butterfly.
“Oh sweet girl,” he coos, cupping her face. “Baby, you always take care of me too. You take care of me when I’m sick, you make me food, you’re always the one who tells me I’m going too far when I’m working out too much, and best of all you scratch my back to help me fall asleep.” He takes a deep shuddering breath in. “Don’t talk about yourself like that. You are not a burden to me. Never will be one. That’s not how love works. How can someone I love so fucking deeply be a burden, hmm?” A tear, beads at his waterline, and she reaches forward and wipes it away.] tears up fr
[tugging their joint hands towards his lips as he seals their deal with a kiss.] I don't know what I'm done with you for. The fluffiness, or the angst.
[“That so?” He questions, a content smile stretches across his face, making the butterflies erupt from deep within his chest.
“Yeah. Don’t tell Dolphin this but I think you are very close to replacing him,” she confesses, feeling the heat rush to the tips of her ears.
“Poor guy. That stuffie never had a chance.” He smirks. “Best to keep it a secret from him then.”
“Yeah, would want him murdering you in the middle of the night for stealing his favourite girl away,” she giggles.
“I better be on the lookout for him when I come over to yours then,” he laughs.] ahhhhhHHHHHHH MAYAAAAAAAAAAA
[“Yeah.” He answers quickly, feeling his heart pick up speed, blushing because he knows she could feel it too. “When the right person comes along.” Mossy eyes dilate as they flick to her raven irises. “I won’t probably jump into it like my parents did. But yeah, I’d love to have my own family to come back to after a long day.”
“Family like kids or animal babies?”
“It’ll be nice to have one of each. A boy and a girl. Pups too. And Maybe if I’m lucky the missus will let me have a turtle like I’ve always wanted.] my oh my Maya, you're SO not getting away with this.
[Harry sighs, he hates that her mother constantly has the ability to do this to her and he hates that no matter how hard Layla tries, she keeps getting bulldozed.] I FREAKING KNOW RIGHT
[“You know,” Layla says, “I never thought of talking to her. She could have been in the same position as me years ago. Thanks Harry.”
“Happy to be of service,” he salutes, making the two laugh. “I love you, Layla.” He pinches her cheek fondly.
“I know.” She smiles, pressing a kiss to the inked antenna of the butterfly inked to his chest. “Thank you for tonight. I can’t begin to tell you how much you mean to me.”] thank you very much Maya. Thank you.
////
[“Just thought we’d drop off lunch for you. Aloo Paratha,” Ashwin replies, shaking the box of Tupperware in his hand.] immediately starts drooling
[“I didn’t want that ஓட்டைவாய் (blabbermouth) to hear,” he informs her, turning around to make sure Pooja isn’t eavesdropping.] there's something about the word 'blabbermouth' that makes me laught out loud every time
[“I was wondering if you’d been to the Museum of Art. I thought it would be a fun trip,” Ashwin suggests......You've been to a lot of places with Harry huh?”] I have a feeling someone has a crush.... eh
[“You don’t have to accompany him everywhere,” he laughs. ] ...stfu
////
[She unscrews the lid of the honey jar, and drizzles a generous amount on the slices of Brie and peaches.] me and ms. honey aren't very good friends
peach and cheese???? ahhhhhhhhHHH sometimes the things this girl eats get to me man
[“I’d rather my honey be somewhere else,” he mumbles huskily against her ear. ] *cringes for a second*
[“So bloody sweet for me,” he tells her, as his fingertips smear some honey, from the plate, on her cheek. She squeals in response, when he licks the sweet concoction. ] I get why you put honey in the warnings now
[“We don’t have to do it if-“ He gasps when she spreads it across his lips. She laughs, raising her chin up with pride, a naughty smile spreads across her face.
“My turn then,” she declares, scooting forward so her bum is at the edge of the table. Her sticky hand finds its place, caressing the faint five o’clock shadow, as she smiles into the kiss. ] if only had I been a fan of honey... but that doesn't put much effect cause you see i freaked out just as much if not more.
[He reaches for the small bottle beside her, unceremoniously unscrewing the lid, then drizzling a string of the golden liquid across her full breasts. A shiver runs down her spine, as a cold breeze trails in through the French doors. His fingers dance across her skin, smearing the sugary syrup across her clavicles, down her sternum, making their way down to the small pudge below her bellybutton.
“There,” he muses, stepping back to admire his handiwork. “Now you truly are my sweet girl.”] I swear if mum were to turn around and see me right now, she would call the mental hospital cause i'm going FERAL
[“No no. Want you now. Wanna feel all of you,” she says. ] do not make decisions while horny Layla
[ “And I- shit.” She gasps, as he nudges at her g spot. ] DON'T TELL ME SHE WAS ABOUT TO SAY WHAT I THINK SHE WAS
[“And I love everything I get to do with you,” she mumbles. ] ...oh well
////
[“Alright see you tomorrow. Tell me how it goes. Can’t believe you’re old enough to be teaching at a collegiate level,” he points, pinching her dimpled cheek and pulling it from side to side making her swat him away. ] smiles
[Showtime.] SLAYYY
I seriously wish I had a teacher like her during online classes sigh
[The rest of the class goes smoothly. The students became extremely enthusiastic when she pulled up the PowerPoint and played a game - making the class do the Stroop test, wanting to show that learning behavioural neuroscience was not as boring as they think. It was quite rewarding to see all twenty three students very easily theorise what the experiment measures, and how it can be useful in their practice as future clinicians. They took a thirty minute break and Layla was so grateful for the bowl of nuts her uncle put on the desk. They all went through the syllabus in detail and to finish off the class, she made everyone introduce themselves and name rate the last movie they watched with a noise. Needless to say, the icebreaker was a hoot and if the other two undergrad classes were like this - it was a job well done.] I'm so proud literally love her so much
[With a soft afghan draped over his torso, Harry reads. Or rereads. The copy of Bukowski’s Love Is a Dog From Hell] ahhhHHHHH BUKOWSKIIIIII
[After the Alzheimer’s diagnosis, the roles had reversed - Harry was now the one reading to his grandad, relishing the taste of their moments of spirited discourse - knowing that in the near future he will be longing for them, as his granddad’s faculties decline.] awh
[telling him it was the perfect set up for a wham bam thank you ma’am] lmaooo
[Now, he can’t think of not ever having her in his life. Is it all fate? Were their atoms battered into the very cosmos that created them, intermingling, destined to cross paths? These were some of the questions he’d penned into his journal, the night he’d told her that he loved her. The night he stayed awake just staring at the creature passed out next to him, in the makeshift hobbit hole. ] I only selected 6 lines but this whole paragraph was very much loved by me
[“Don’t laugh. I’ve owned this matching golf outfit since middle school and it’s the only one I have.] I'm guilty that I did laugh
[His mouth twists in disdain as he sees Layla climb into Ashwin’s car with a laugh, handing him her bag of clubs, rolling his eyes at the way Ashwin shuts the trunk of the car. The green eyed monster - is certainly going to make an appearance in his journal today with derision aimed at Ashwin.] what an ending
She's baaaack after crushing her exams! It's honestly so adorable that you feel very protective of Layla. It's endearing to me.
[“You don’t have to accompany him everywhere,” he laughs. ] ...stfu
This made me laugh so hard, not gonna cry. What are we gonna do with Ashwin, huh?
Sorry about honey not agreeing with you. Maybe replace honey with maple syrup of some sort??
[ “And I- shit.” She gasps, as he nudges at her g spot. ] DON'T TELL ME SHE WAS ABOUT TO SAY WHAT I THINK SHE WAS [“And I love everything I get to do with you,” she mumbles. ] ...oh well
Patience, young grasshopper... if it happens, you'll be the first one to know.
Thank you so much for the feedback! You know how much I cherish these!
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For Better, For Worse - But Maybe Not Forever
Today’s Advice Highlights
A sweet and kind fiance turns into a cruel and extremely critical husband right after marriage — is this normal
Discussing gaslighting and other tell-tale tactics of an emotional abuser.
Dr. Deb dishes out the one advice for a textbook case of abusive behavior (before it escalates).
Dear Dr. Deb,
I grew up in a pretty dysfunctional family: an abusive father and a passive, co-dependent mother. Witnessing this toxic situation growing up, I felt determined to escape and break the pattern in my own relationships.
Ten months ago, I married my boyfriend who had been the kindest, funniest, and sweetest soul. I remember how romantic he had been when he proposed to me, and I felt like so fortunate that I met someone like him.
I’m using the past tense here for good reason. Since the wedding, his personality has changed – a lot. I know that marriage is a life-changing event, but he’s done a complete 180.
From being a soft-spoken gentleman, he’s turned into a nasty, demanding creature who constantly says cruel things and inflicting emotional harm on me.
When we go out with friends these days, he’ll provoke an argument and blame me for it. I know that I did nothing wrong, but he’ll wear me down with the way he berates and tears me down. He would tell me, “Everyone knows how you are. No one likes you. People don’t want to be around you, just ask them.”
I’m not someone who needs constant validation, but he makes me question my sanity at every turn. He’s quick to blame me and my mental health issues as the root cause of our problems. Then I end up thinking that it’s all my fault, so I constantly apologize.
It’s gotten so bad that I’m walking on eggshells in my own home. I’m afraid of how he’ll react to even a simple question. On any given day, I’ll hear his snide comments: “You’re so dramatic and emotional.” “It’s not that bad.” “Get over it.”
I still love my husband, but I don’t love the way he treats me. I also don’t love that I feel worthless and incompetent whenever I’m with him. He justifies it all by saying he only wants to help me become a better person.
I feel like I’ve been lured and tricked into marrying someone exactly like my father. Something that I never imagined would happen to me. Dr. Deb, what can I do in this situation? How do I even begin to fix this?
Sincerely,
Baited and Switched
—————————————————————————————————
Dear Baited,
I don’t typically tell people what to do, but in this case, it sounds like such a textbook case that I have one piece of advice for you: Leave. My next advice: Leave. And…you already know what my next advice would be.
You’re in the first stages of an abusive marriage that’s putting your mental health and well-being at stake. The next stage is something you don’t want to stay on for. Get away from it now.
Your husband’s constant gaslighting is a sneaky tactic to make you vulnerable to manipulation. He’s working on turning you into someone who is too preoccupied and worn down with self-doubt to figure out what’s really happening.
This kind of extreme gaslighting is a major feature of emotionally abusive relationships, like your marriage. Your husband has succeeded in making you question your reality, your judgment, and your sanity. You’ve become unrecognizable, even to yourself.
Let me give you a reality check and turn the lens on your husband.
Your husband may seem like he “changed.” The truth is he’s experienced. This probably isn’t his first rodeo. His true self is egocentric, manipulative, and coercive. His goal is to dominate and control you. Like most abusers, he’s oblivious to the damage and devastation he’s causing you. He’s only concerned about how it affects him.
Here’s another important reality check for you: odds are, he’s never going to change.
He’ll keep doing this until you can’t take it anymore – or worse. I know you’ve seen the true crime shows and the women who fell under the “or worse” category. There are different psychological theories to explain how or why someone like your husband becomes a manipulative abuser. One thing I can tell you is that it’s not your fault.
And so the question is what do you do? You say you still love him. But you can love someone and still decide to leave them. Your biggest priority now is and must be to love yourself. You deserve to thrive in a healthy, loving relationship.
My advice, unequivocally, is to leave your husband and get a divorce or annulment as quickly as possible.
Wishing You the Best,
Dr. Deb
Do you have a burning question — Your comments in response to a column are welcome. I will do my best to answer as many of your questions as I can.
Click here to send your question.
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I’m doing anon bc my friends have my tumblr and I don’t want them to know this, haha. I’m afraid of my sister. She’s only two years younger then me, but she’s so terrifying. She can easily twist anything to get me in trouble with my parents(she doesn’t much anymore, but that was what she did when we were little), and I feel like she’s threatening to me physically and mentally? Today she was particularly upset and she was yelling at me and my older sister. Just a few minutes ago, she took my cellphone charger and would not give it back after I asked her politely multiple times. She got angry and went in her desk, took her own, broken, charger, and threw it at me(with the cube thingy on it). I managed to step out of the way, but then she started yelling and moving towards me aggressively so I ran out of our bedroom and I’m currently hiding. I don’t know how to deal with this, I’m going to be stuck with her for another three years at least, and so far it’s given me generalized anxiety, social anxiety, and PTSD from one specific occasion. My parents say that all siblings fight, but I KNOW this isn’t normal. It’s only gotten worse since my mom moved out. I want to run away everyday but I don’t have the courage. I haven’t told anyone about this because I’m already perceived as the weak child and the disappointment(my little sisters words). I don’t want to be ridiculed for being afraid of her. I don’t know what to do. I just want it all to stop.
Do you want free mental help? What about remote, pay-what-you-want counselling? Visit askingjude.org.
As I read this, my first thought was, “Where are the adults?” They should be stepping in and stopping all of this; it never should have escalated into this kind of a situation. I am so sorry you feel frightened of your sister and that your home is not a safe place to be. Her behavior goes beyond the realm of siblings fighting; she’s really hurting you!
Has your sister always been so violent and mean to you? To classmates? To other family members? I question how her outbursts started and why they are still continuing because she’s not a toddler anymore, and tantrums should stop in the early grades (ex. around kindergarten). She sounds like she’s in middle school, which means your parents need to nip her behavior in the bud. While I am not asking you to psychoanalyze your sister, I think being able to better understand her behavior (and possibly identifying some causes or contributing factors) will help you better deal with her and keep yourself safe.
Do you often feel you need to walk on eggshells around her? Did you two get along at all at any point? What is the dynamic like between her and your dad? Her and your mom? Do either of them tend to give into her whenever she starts complaining or whining? Do they keep putting the responsibility on you and your older sister to “be the bigger person”? If they enable her bad behavior and just expect you two to deal with it, they’re fostering an unhealthy dynamic amongst the three of you. I understand that mom isn’t living with you all now, and I can’t help but wonder if that is part of why sis acts out so much.
Are you familiar with Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs? This is a chart of all the different needs that humans have and the importance of each one. Maslow was a psychologist who theorized that humans are very rich, complex creatures and thus have a rich array of needs. Some MUST be met before others can be. The reason why I mentioned this is that shelter and safety are two of the most important needs that people have. Your sister is threatening both of these with her outbursts and her manipulation of your parents.
In addition to the sense of safety, your sister is also damaging your relationships with your parents, which interferes with another essential need for people- especially young folk. In other words, she is interfering with your ability to form or maintain healthy attachments to your parents because she is working to undermine the trust between you and your parents.
This article explains each level of the hierarchy: https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html
What sis is doing is she’s actively disrupting levels 2 and 3 for you, which is going to make it harder for you to feel safe and secure and believed in while being in your own home.
Definitely talk to your parents if you can. I understand you said mom had moved out, but can you talk to her privately? Can you go see her and maybe go to lunch or spend time at her house together? I really think getting out of the toxic household and spending time with a trusted adult is going to make a difference because you are reducing the time spent in a triggering environment and with a person who does things that trigger you.
Do you live with dad? Or other relatives? Whoever you live with needs to put a stop to this ASAP because it’s unhealthy to live in such stress and fear. You can take them aside while sis isn’t home or talk to them outside (such as over a meal or while running errands together). As long as the two of you can have a private and uninterrupted conversation, that should help you explain everything. If you are looking for starting points, tell them that you do not feel safe at home anymore and that it’s because of your little sis. Tell them the most recent thing she did, and tell them it’s not the first time she’s done something violent like that. It’s a pattern, and you are tired of feeling scared and unsafe in your own home and that it’s NOT just “siblings fighting.” Despite your best efforts to de-escalate situations, her bad behavior persists. While it’s great to see you trying to work things out with her, this is too big a problem for you to solve alone.
It may also help to try identifying your triggers for PTSD and the different forms of anxiety. Knowing what they are and what effects they have on you will help you become more self-aware and thus more able to take action to keep yourself safe. Have you received an official diagnosis of PTSD or any of the anxiety disorders you mentioned? If not, that would be a great thing to do because you can meet with a professional who can help you manage your triggers and (metaphorically) light a fire under your parents’ rear ends to stop sis’ bad behavior.
I have a few resources to learn more about PTSD here:
https://dualdiagnosis.org/mental-health-and-addiction/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-and-addiction/how-trauma-affects-the-human-body/
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk is a great resource for people looking to understand more of the science behind PTSD and trauma in general.
None of this is to blame or shame you or for me to waggle my finger at you and bark orders at you; it is all to help you understand the importance of protecting yourself from toxic people as best as you can and to emphasize that the adults in your life should be stepping up and protecting you.
You may want to share this article with your parents: https://www.verywellfamily.com/what-to-do-when-kids-fight-5116696
Perhaps this will serve as a wake-up call for them to put a stop to sis’ behavior.
If your folks won’t stand up to her, then feel free to call in other supportive adults. Perhaps speaking with a trusted teacher or your school guidance counselor or social worker will get you some resources and ways to better address this situation with your parents. They can make recommendations for programs for you or your family.
That being said, I do want to assuage any potential fears that the above will call up Child Protection Services (CPS) and that it’ll tear your family apart. The adults listed above are mandatory reporters, but they will only reach out if they suspect you are in danger of abuse or are actively being abused or neglected. CPS is not the first port of call; the aforementioned adults will try to communicate with you and your family, point you to programs or resources, etc. If they do need to reach out to CPS, it is because they have reason to suspect you are in danger, and they want it on CPS’ record to facilitate keeping you and your family safe. They do not want to separate you or any family unless absolutely necessary.
Socially-distanced hugs,
Angelica Barile
Ask A Question Here
#ask#advice#mental health#help#support#counseling#love advice#relationship advice#dating advice#family advice#health advice#mental health advice
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Broken Glass is the Least of our Worries
Description: Short Elijah x male reader x Klaus that I found in my notes. Elijah and the reader have been together for a little while and Klaus seems to take issue with this.
Warnings: Sibling incest and Angst
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Swinging his leg over Elijah’s lap Y/N made himself comfortable in his favorite seat. The look on his lover's face prompted him to ask. “Is everything alright, you look… lost?” It took him a moment to come to and when he did he gave a faint smile.
“I’m fine, I… I just worry about Niklaus. He seems different as of late, more destructive, and uneasy.”
“You spend an awful amount of time worrying ‘Lijah.” There was a small pause in Y/N’s speech. “Though this time I would have to agree it seems like whenever he and I are in the same room he’s on edge. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells. I mean I don’t think he’s ever really liked me but it seems to be getting worse.”
“Do not take Niklaus’ animosity to heart Y/N. He seems to harbor ill feelings towards anyone I or Rebekah take interest in.” Elijah spoke in a slightly irritated manner.
“Don’t worry ‘Lijah I don’t take it to heart I understand where Klaus is coming from. Granted, his way of dealing with it is more than questionable.” Elijah glanced at Y/N with an arched eyebrow and question in his eyes.
“I just mean that Klaus is scared of losing the few people he allows himself to care for. He thinks that if you love someone else then you can’t also love him…” Y/N was cut off by none other than Klaus himself. He stood in the doorway of Elijah’s room.
“You know if you're going to talk about someone in their own home maybe you should make sure they can’t hear you.” He turned on his heels but before walking off he turned his head to look at Y/N. “And Y/N, I am not scared of anything you’d do well to remember that, Luv.” Y/N simply rolled his eyes and turned to Elijah.
With a sly smirk, he asks “Wanna get out of here?”
~~~~~~
Somehow Y/N managed to find himself at the compound alone with Klaus. Elijah has important matters to attend to though he said he wouldn’t be gone for long. Rebekah was off with Marcel and Kol was with Davina not that he was around much anyway (He and Klaus had gotten into it some time ago and neither party was going to apologize).
Klaus brushed past Y/N on his way to his studio with no intention to stop and talk but when Y/N suddenly spoke Klaus stopped walking.
“You know just for the record Niklaus, it has never been and nor will it ever be in my intentions to steal Elijah from you. Not that I ever could. He loves you, and nothing you could ever do or say will change that. Don’t take him for granted.” Klaus slowly turned around to face Y/N again.
“What if I don’t want to be grateful? What if I want more?” Klaus was a hard person to read. His voice made it sound like he was challenging Y/N. But the look in his eyes seemed far closer to fear than anything else.
“What more could you possibly want?” It was a question born of confusion and curiosity.
“You.” Klaus sped over to Y/N. “Him, everything in between.” Before he could fully comprehend what was just said Y/N found himself pressed up against the closest wall with Klaus’ lips covering his own.
Then Klaus was speeding away. Confused, hot, and bothered Y/N looks around and sees Elijah coming towards him.
Elijah inspects him. Y/N knows he’s red and panting like he just ran a marathon. Then there’s a crash.
“You know the sound of Y/N harsh breathing and heartbeat almost drowns out your own. However, I certainly heard whatever it is you just destroyed.”
“Is that all you have to say?” Y/N was quiet, there was no viable excuse for making out with your boyfriend’s brother.
“You just caught your brother making out with your boyfriend, and you’re worried about some broken glass.” His voice was accusatory, but everyone could tell that Klaus was more than grateful for his brother's lack of anger towards him.
“I am not worried about a broken glass Niklaus although I do hope that you intend to clean that up. I am however rather curious about the conversation you two were having.”
~~~~~~~
Y/N’s POV
We were sitting or at least Klaus and I were, Elijah was pouring drinks.
In my opinion, he was way too calm about this. Honestly, I was way too calm about this. It’s one thing for Klaus to kiss me but it’s an entirely different thing for me to kiss him back. I don’t even know why I did it. I mean obviously, Niklaus is attractive, anyone with eyes can see that, but I’ve never been a cheater and I know that in any other situation I would have pushed him away. So why didn’t I? Before I could come up with an answer to that question Elijah spoke.
“If I am, to be honest, I’m more surprised that it took you two this long to act on your feelings.” I was beyond confused, what the actual fuck was that supposed to mean.
“I’m sorry, what!?”
“Y/N I know what you feel for my brother and I know what you feel for me both fine with me. I understand that you have not allowed yourself to put a name to what you feel for Niklaus but it’s alright.” I knew he was right. There’s something about Klaus that makes me feel something. I’ve been too scared to call it what it is. Love. I simply smiled and nodded at Elijah.
Before I made it clear to Niklaus how I felt I wanted to know more about what he was feeling. After all, it was him who kissed me first.
“Niklaus you said that you wanted me, what exactly do you want?” He also said he wanted Elijah but it wasn’t my place to question him about that.
He didn’t answer for a moment then he spoke up.
“I want you Y/N. I want you to love me, to desire me the way I desire you.” Good.
“Well… I guess today’s your lucky day. I do love you but Niklaus, this doesn’t change the way I feel about Elijah. I need you to understand that.”
“I do.” Klaus nodded.
“That’s all good and well but I still have a question for you Niklaus,” Elijah said. Klaus visibly stiffened. He was scared. Or at least nervous. “What do you want from me, Niklaus?”
~~~~~~~~
Third Person
“What do you want from me, Niklaus?”
“Why do you think I want something from you?” He’d already pushed it tonight, so he was going to do his best to get out of continuing to discuss his feelings.
“I heard what you said to Y/N when I walked in. He asked you what you wanted and you responded ‘You. Him, everything in between.’ I’m just assuming that I’m him. So I’ll repeat my question once more. What do you want from me, Niklaus?”
It had been a long time since these kinds of nerves had crept up on Klaus. After all, he had thought he buried these feelings a long time ago. He should have known better.
#the originals#klaus mikealson x male reader#elijah mikealson x male reader#Elijah x reader x klaus#male reade#klaus x elijah#the originals x male reader#klaus x reader#elijah mikealson x reader#klaus mikealson x reader#my best friend named this fic#i love her she's the best
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~ 𝐁𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐞𝐚 ~
𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝; SMUT!!! a smidge of angst and a lil fluff, felix x fem!reader. enemies to fwb, bullying!!!, highschool!au, blowjob, pierced!felix, mentions of complicated family relationships/bad economy, felix being rude lmao, PIV, unprotected sex (use protections ffs, this is a bad example), orgasm (m/f), cum, nicknames, shy reader, fingering.
𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝; 6.6 k
𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎; Consent is like tea or my personal favorite,,, tea slut HSAHSHA PLEASE im- anyways enjoy both tea and consent, both very very sexy and good for you
also,,, my first kinda long fic??
𝘚𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺; Lee Felix. The class bully. Also the son of a wealthy business man. You didn’t have the same privileges, living alone at such a young age. After an arrangement Felix invites you to work at his fathers old tea shop but this relationship turns into something unexpected.
The cold wind blew on your exposed calfs, the skirt of the school uniform fluttering as your backpack was lazily thrown across your shoulder, your head turned to the direction the bus comes from. You were not the only one on that bus stop. Other students standing at least a feet apart from each other, all eagerly waiting to hurry back to their comfortable homes, eat dinner and start on their assignments.
You on the other hand had other plans.
What was on your computer screen wasn’t the typical essay or sheet of physics questions. It was job applications. And lots of them.
A notification arrived, your phone vibrating in your coat pocket and as the screen lit up you saw a message.
[ Rent due today y/n, have it in by 8 ]
Living by yourself in a dusty apartment that contained nothing more than a bed, a desk and a tiny kitchen overfilled with noodle packets was nothing to be proud of. You could barely afford that type of lifestyle since you were a student so how on earth were you gonna get rent in to the old lady that served as your landlord?
You sighed, the packed bus rolling slowly on the way and stopping, there barely being place to stand in the crowded vehicle.
Your apartment was right above an old tea shop, the owner being a wealthy man that owned several shops on the block. His busy lifestyle including buying and selling properties kept him away from his true passion in life; tea. What scared you was his resemblance to a person you knew. A person you knew too well.
Lee Felix
His only purpose in life was to have fun. To ruin others. And he had every opporunity to do so. His report card was nothing but lies and money, his fathers wealth being able to buy him decent grades without lifting a finger. There was one, only one, instance where the young boy would try his best and that’s when intimidating others. His best skill. Those piercing dark eyes and knife-sharp jaw could leave anyone shaken for days.
But do you know who his favorite person to bully was?
You.
All the hurtful memories eventually started to merge together but one stood out clearly to you. It happened a year ago. You walked into the sunlit classroom, your other classmates sitting around their desks, chatting and showing each other photos, laughing happily. Friends was not something you had, more like acquaintance. The students you would greet and exchange a couple of words with but nothing more. Your assigned seat was in the third row, the one sitting right behind you being Felix himself. With a quick glance at the clock you looked underneath your desk, searching for the book you needed for english class, your eyebrows furrowing as you searched desperatly, turning every book over and ripping open your backpack, did you forget it at home?
“Looking for this?”
The cold voice sent a shiver down your spine, you slowly turning back, afraid of what evil gaze awaited you. You gulped as you saw his angular facial structure, his cheekbones pertruding as he held your english book in his hand, the arms of the white school uniform shirt being rolled up just enough to show off his blinged out watch, veins softly trailing upwards on his flexed arms.
You nodded to which Felix scoffed. Sighing you stood up, standing at the side of his desk and all of a sudden throwing yourself over it in a quest of snatching it from his grasp but failing epically, you falling down onto the floor, scraping your knees on the rough wooden flooring of the classroom. You try to stand up but was quickly stopped by Felix grabbing your face with his other hand, his wrists decked out with multiple delicate chains, all jingling with his movements.
Meeting his gaze made your skin crawl, his eyes almost animalistic as he looked deep into your innocent doe-eyes, smirking. His blonde hair falling on each side of his face, framing it like a renaissance painting since his stoic features was art in itself. Your eyes lingered a bit too long on Felix’s making the boy annoyed, before you knew it a clear liquid was spilling down your cheek, that not being tears but instead Felix’s spit. You flinch back as he waves the book infront of your face, tears jerking in the corner of your glossy eyes due to the humiliation, your other classmates forming a circle around the two of you, unable to do anything since that could mean the end of them.
“You want this, you want it so bad? What’s that angel? You’re gonna cry?”
He crouches as your gaze lowers to the floor, hair hanging infront of your face as a shield from his degrading words as the tears started pouring out of you like water, mixing with Felix’s saliva. He laughs psychotically, the cold laughter echoing in the classroom, tiny specs of dusty floating around like bubbles in a fizzy drink. The bold boy puts down the book on the floor behind him before he raises his hand, you shutting your eyes tightly, expecting the worst but being surprised as his hand laces in your disheveled locks. He pushes a strand of hair behind your flushed ear, leaning in close enough for you to feel his breath hit the shell of your ear.
“I’m gonna give it to you,,, but I want something in return”
You snap your head up to look at him, your eyes wide open, eyebrows hightened.
“W-what do you want?” you say, only for him to hear.
Felix hums, running his tongue in the inside on his cheek before speaking in a low voice.
“You”
You choked on your own spit, coughing as you turned away from him. You could hear his laugh ringing in your ears and after your coughing fit you turned back hastily, eyes as big as saucers. This couldn’t be true, this couldn’t be what you though it was. In sheer panic you once again tried to snatch the book, crawling on the floor like a bug in order to snake around his back to have a chance to grab the corner of plastic outside of the textbook but being met with disappointment when Felix slammed his foot on it, you retracting your hand after being mere inches away from his shoe. The boy tsked.
“I expect you at the school gate by the end of the day and if you don’t show up you’re gonna pay for it, understood angel?”
You nod, just nod. No words or mimicks. Simply a nod. His intimidation wiping the entire alphabet from your mind.
He stands up, grabbing the book and throwing it at you before exiting the classroom, a evil smirk plastered on his face. The sharp gazes of other students around you made you want to escape but you couldn’t, class was starting in 2 minutes.
♡
The sun shone it’s rays on your face, students exiting through the wide white metal gates. You ran your hand through your hair, pulling the straps of your backpack impatiently at you looked left to right, seeing the flowers blossom out in the rather windy weather. Suddenly your wrist was grabbed by a hand wider than yours.
It was Felix.
His closeness made you gulp loudly, a lump nestling into your stomach as you felt your anxiety rise, scared of what he might do to you even if you did find him strangely attractive even though he was a complete asshole. But who didn’t? The entire school was ready to give up their life in order to even be this close to the boy, girls and boys alike. You shook your head, wanting to get rid of the silly thoughts that clouded your mind. Only after minutes did you realise that your legs moved on their own, you being dragged by Felix, his hand still on your wrist.
“W-where are we going?” you inquired, the wind blowing on the blonde pierced boy, his angelic hair bouncing with every step.
“Don’t worry about it” he said, not speaking a single more word during the entire time he held your wrist and walked with you in the spring weather.
All of a sudden the two of you were standing infront of the tea shop, you lifting your head to glance upwards at your dusty window that was right above the tiny wooden sign that said “Tea Shop”, swinging rustily back and forward. Felix retrieves a key, unlocking the corrodated wooden door, the color matching the sign above.
“Wh- how do you know-”
Felix hushes you, closing the door behind you before throwing the keys on the counter.
“I don’t care about what you have to say. My father owns this place and I usually hang around here whenever it’s closed.”
“Do you work here?” you asked with a voice filled with curiosity.
Felix starts laughing his signature laugh, it being laced with nothing but iniquity.
“Work? Do you think I need to work? I’m the only child of a wealthy family, I’m pretty much settled for life”
You nervously look down at the floor, only being in the tea shop a couple of times before it was closed for business.
“Well,,, I know that your father owns this place, I live in the apartment just above so-”
You were quickly cut of by Felix slamming his hand on the table, standing behind the checkout counter and leaning over it with his two arms as pedestals.
“Why?”
You looked at him confused before your eyes gazed across the wall of glas cabinets displaying their finest china. Teapots with squiggly handles, painted with the utmost attention to detail, the colors of the scenes painted contrasting nicely with the eggshell white background. Small lamps were installed above each teapot, illuminating the work of art even more.
“Why what?” you said back, still in trance from the beauty of the teapots.
“Why do you live alone?” His eyebrows raised.
“I never said that!”
“y/n, that apartment is barely enough for a fucking mouse, there’s no way you could live there with someone else”
Damn, how did he know that? You had no other choice but to nod timidly, curling your hand into a fist.
“Don’t have the best relationship with my parents and since they aren’t wealthy like yours I have to do my best to find a way to support myself” you spat out at him, annoyed at his many questions.
“Touché” Felix said shortly, shrugging his shoulders.
After a long moment of silence the blonde boy spoke again;
“Let’s make a deal, I’ll get you a job here and I’ll join you but only because you’re stupid and need my help, not because I want to be here”
Your eyes light up, like an excited child you dash toward the counter and place your hands near Felix’s, looking at him with twinkling eyes.
“Really? You would do that?”
Felix nods.
“But don’t get too excited, you haven’t paid your end of the deal yet”
“Tell me! I’ll do anything, I promise!” you says quickly, smiling widely at Felix’s deadpan face.
“Suck me off”
Your previously bright smile faded in a matter of seconds, now turning into pure confusion.
“Wh-what? I can’t do that! Are you crazy?!”
Felix scoffs, walking towards the door in a cocky manner with his black backpack over his shoulder, wearing black ripped jeans that were strictly banned in school but no longer warned to Felix by the teachers. The schools logo embroidered on the white flowy shirt that was unbuttoned, exposing his brand name t-shirt.
Just in time you managed to block the door, his lips inches from yours as he sighed, smirking down at you.
“I’ll do it! I will do it!”
You blurted out, you had no other choice but to do it. Seeking other jobs had been impossible since you were only a student without any work experience, not having many other skills other than procrastinating and sleeping. You needed this in order to survive. You needed him.
The boy pushed you against the entrance door, placing his forehead against yours.
“Of course you will” Felix whispered in a voice deeper than the ocean, causing you to helplessly gulp and drop down on your knees, them hitting the floor with a thump. His small but veiny hands reached for his belt, unbuckling it in a swift motion, metal hitting each other. You were lost deep in thoughts, simply staring at his crotch whilst rethinking your every life decision. Wondering how on earth you got to this point, soon having your mouth stuffed with your bully’s dick.
Thank god that he was at least hot.
Felix popped his dick over the band of his underwear and as if you hadn’t had enough surprises today one last one awaited you. A silver metal barbell lodged right beneath his pretty red tip, his dick already hard as he gave it a couple of pumps. Your mouth fell agape, cheeks heating up as you struggled to keep a straight face. Felix being the tease he is had to comment;
“What? Bigger than you thought?”
You scoffed from his boldness, not believing your ears.
“N-no! Get over yourself you ass”
“Enough talking princess” Felix said in a deep voice, rubbing the tip of his leaking cock on your plushy lips, them being coated with a layer of saliva from you repeatedly lickning them out of nervousness.
There was a moment of awkwardness, you not being sure where to place your hands before you grabbed the base of his girthy dick, pursing your lips and latching them onto the tip, sinking down gradually in order to not choke immedietly, not wanting to embarrass yourself even more than you already had.
Felix let out a strained groan at the sensation, you feeling the cold metal as you flattened your tongue, licking a fat strap on the underside of his cock earning yet another groan. The blonde laced his fingers in your hair, tugging on it slightly in order to control the sinful sounds dripping out of his mouth. You whimpered against his dick, there barely being any room to breath as your nose was hovering just above his abdomen, impressed by your own gag reflex but that didn’t last long, Felix now shoving your head down his length, making you choke.
“Wow, is there anything you can do right? Can’t even suck me off properly”
You can only hum in response, sending shivers down Felix’s spine from the vibrations, the boy feeling the knot in his stomach tightening. The hair flies in front of you face as you bob your head down his cock that was equally as veiny as his decked out arms, feeling the metal hitting your bottom teeth a couple of times. Tears teased the corners of your eyes as you were throat deep on Felix’s member, your hands slightly sweaty from the butterflies in your stomach. Eventually Felix started to weaken in your grasp, small grunts escaping him as you hollowed your cheeks, mascara staining your heated cheeks.
“f-fuck,,,yes just like that,,ah-”
Luckily for the both of you the shop was located in a rather desolate area of town therefore no bypassers saw the scandalous view through the door that was decorated with a small foggged window. But did Felix care? Not really, the boy was bold enough to get sucked off in public if the opportunity presented itself.
You looked up at him with the most innocent eyes you could muster, spit starting to dribble down your chin and landing on your skirt, forming slightly saturated patches on the fabric from the wetness. The blonde boys useless comments didn’t make it any easier to withstand this agonizing process.
“Ah,,, never thought I would be seeing you like this, thought I had degraded you enough but this is just another level of humiliation, isn’t it y/n?”
The hand that was previously tangled in your hair was now moved to your stained cheek, him carefully swiping his thumb across the warm skin but you furrowed your eyebrows, swatting his hand away causing him to scoff before being interupted by his own loud moan, you pulling off and kitten licking his tip, coaxing his impending orgasm.
It didn’t take long before the boy was shutting his eyes tightly, his jaw slacking as a last low vibrational growl ringed in your ears, his eyes still piercing yours while the thick white liquid spilled out of him, coating the metal bar and seeped into your mouth, your dry lips now getting a coat of clear gloss, the rest dripping down onto the floor and your dark colored skirt.
You shook your head as you looked around the shop, not wanting to spit out his salty seed right on the floor but Felix simply shook his head back at you, grabbing your face gently.
“Swallow”
Goosebumps erupted on your skin from his intimidating voice, as if you’d been cast under a spell you nod, swallowing the droplets of cum harshly, the sound of your loud gulp causing Felix to hum and with a smile, ruffle your hair before zipping himself up and running a hand through his own hair, exposing his forehead for just a bit. You stand up on your own, legs wobbling as you don’t even expect the rude boy to help.
“You start tomorrow after school, my father will only be happy to know that someone actually want’s to work in this shithole. I’ll join you but once again, not because I want to but because your stupid head will mess everything up.”
You nod, only now noticing how scruffy the rest of the teashop looked, moving boxes piling up like the dust in the windowsills. You jerked your head to the side, eyes wandering all over the place, everywhere from the wittering plants to the miscellaneous stacks of files.
The both of you step out of the dusty shop, the cool air hitting your cheek, now remembering the makeup that was running down it. Without saying a word Felix tries to escape but you stop him, putting a hand on his shoulder. He doesn’t turn around, staring at the road ahead of him.
“Thank you”
You whisper out, your hair fluttering in the wind, feeling yourself getting emotional from his seemingly sweet gesture. Felix starts walking, the sound of his footsteps getting fainter as the disappears down the sunny asphalt road, leaving you standing infront of the shop before you go behind the shop, entering your burrow of an apartment.
♡
You walk to the teashop in the floral spring weather, wondering where Felix had been all day since he wasn’t in school this wednesday where lectures went in half speed. Arriving at the shop everything was surprisingly closed. You peeked into the window, standing on your toes as if that would improve your vision but gave up quickly after, only seeing the scene from yesterday, the same old piles of rubbish.
A light tap threw you off guard, you yelping and jerking away before noticing the blonde hair, Felix greeting you with a jingle of keys in his hand.
“Wanna have the honors? I mean, it is your first day after all”
You respond with a small “yes” before grabbing the keys from his hand and unlocking the entrance to the stuffy teashop, coughing as you step in from the dust that twirled all around the two of you. You walked over to the sad plants that were placed haphazardly in the windowsill, swiping your finger over the leafs and closely examining the dust that rubbed off, blowing it away softly before turning to Felix that was nearing the pile of random files.
“Looks like we have a bunch of work to do before we can actually brew tea”
He didn’t smile, visibly annoyed. Felix went into the back, behind the beaded curtain he retrieved a bucket of cleaning supplies.
“You mop the floors, I’ll clean some of the heavy stuff away”
Felix said, his voice still in that notorious deep tone.
“Not fair? There’s not even a mop which means I’ll have to do it by hand?”
Felix scoffed, throwing a old rag at you before turning around and grabbing a moving box filled with god knows what. You sigh, grabbing the bucket and emptying the contents, the brushes and strangly colored bottles of cleaning solution spreading across the counter before you went behind the beaded curtain, being met by a murky kitchen that hadn’t been cleaned in what seemed like forever. You sighed, looking around and opening cabinets only to be met with half broken porcelain and cobwebs, the shelf at the top displaying a multitude of metal cans filled with loose tea that had probably gone tasteless. With a disgusted face you close the cabinet, instead filling up the bucket with water and adding dishsoap in lack of other cleaning substance.
Hours ticked by, Felix sighing and huffing out of annoyance when carrying out and sorting through countless boxes while you cleaned the floor and dusted every corner, the shop transforming right before your eyes. The two of you eventually ended up in the kitchen, you observing every cup for cracks and disposing of those that showed just that as Felix was washing those that you thought looked presentable. Felix tried his best to not drop the cups despite his slippery fingers in a pathetic attempt at trying to do the dishes, it was clear that he had never in his life had to do this which made you roll your eyes, thinking about the boiling anger you had at this pompous and spoiled boy.
“Do you like living alone y/n? ”
The question was rather unexpected, making you choke on your own saliva. Never in your life had you thought that he cared about you. You shrugged your shoulders, wanting to appear unbothered.
“y-yeah, I wanted to be more responsible, I mean we are adults soon and nothing is served on a silver platter but I wouldn’t expect you to know.”
Felix smirked, seeing right through your lie but choosing to not taunt you. You felt vulnerable from the question but instead of continuing the awkward silence you wanted to get to know him better, maybe he wasn’t such a dick after all, maybe his tough guy personality was only a facade?
“What’s with that piercing?” you said, pointing at his groin with your chin making Felix laugh, getting shy from your question but snapping back to his cold outer self.
“It was a bet and as you can see I lost” he scoffed before continuing, “wanna see?”
Your eyes widened, cheeks heating up before stammering out;
“N-no, Felix you’re disgusting!” you say in desperation for an answer but Felix only laughs even more, almost annoying you.
“Well it wasn’t so disgusting when you were sucking me off, have you forgotten babygirl? Maybe I should teach you your place again.”
You gulped, not answering but instead just staring at him, a cup frozen in your hand as Felix locks his eyes with your, tilting his head in a cocky manner. You harshly place the cup down, storming out into the area where racks upon racks displayed the many tea sorts that were stashed away somewhere in the shop, Felix retrieving them earlier in the day. You start sorting through them, seeing a paper with orders on a clipboard and deciding to check the different kinds. Everything from oolong to pu’er to herbal was lined up in both teabags or loose tea leafs and surprisingly Felix did a good job, everything displayed in pretty and uniform lines. Before you could put a dash for a variety of tea that was missing. Felix sticks his head in between the beaded strings of the curtain, his eyes twinkling.
“Want some tea?”
For the first time he seemed cute. Not scary or intimidating, just cute. By the way his blonde locks fell infront of his face to the way his earrings were jingling, fading out to his angular facial structure.
You nod shyly, placing the clipboard on a random shelf before scooting over to the kitchen, seeing that Felix had placed out a white teapot with cobalt blue details, a floral pattern that contradicted to the eggshell white base. On the counter stood a small brown paperbag with black tea and right next to it a small tray of white sugarcubes.
“This seems awfully complicated for making tea” you say, looking at the red kettle boiling on the stove, there not being an electric kettle in this old establishment.
“What you expect? That I’ll be satisfied with you serving some watered down tea from a teabag? There’s a process you know.”
“Wow, and this is coming from Lee Felix? The son of a rich man and also the schools scumbag?”
Felix snaps his towards you, previously looking at the piping hot kettle. He licked the inside of his cheek, exhaling sharply through his nose, turning his cheek towards his shoulder, a momentary pop being heard before he looked at you with his dark eyes.
“I’m being nice, take that to your advantage and I’ll break your kneecaps”
You nodded and he smiled, astonished by the duality of this man.
“Are you just gonna stand there? Come closer”
You stepped closer to the counter, your breath hitching when you felt Felix’s chest again your back, his hands leaning against the counter and trapping you between the two. You swallowed harshly, eyes darting over the various equipment needed to make a simple cup of tea.
“Open the tea pot maybe?”
Felix said, sighing. You feeling his warm breath against the outer shell of your ear, his voice sounding even more dangerous when it was right beside you. You grabbed the blue detailed teapot and opened it, only to see a metal strainer already a part of the pot. Doubtfully you grabbed the little packet of loose leaf tea, removing and placing down the clip that was hindering it’s aroma from escaping the luxurious leafs. The fragrence of the tea hit your senses, the smell almost addictive.
“What tea is this?”
You said, turning the bag in you hand, looking for any type of lettering that would bring you closer to an answer.
“Russian earl grey. It contains bergamot orange making it more pungent”
You hummed, being to scared to turn around and face him, you now zoning out whilst your eyes were stuck on the awfully colored tiles on the kitchen wall.
“You’re supposed to drink it y/n, not smell it”
Felix stated causing you to snap out and notice that you’ve been holding the bag to your nose, scrunching your nose ever so often.
“Oh yeah,,, right,,, sorry. How much should I put in?”
You say, tilting the bag and slowly watching dark colored particles spill into the metal strainer. Felix slowly put his hand on yours, tilting the bag even more. You could feel your heart in your throat, your hands starting to sweat from his close proximity. His hand was warm for such a cold person.
“It’s supposed to fill up one third of the strainer, remember that”
You mewled out a quiet “yes” as he put the bag down, removing his hand from yours. The next step was obvious, filling up the tea pot with hot water. Just as you were about to grab the black handle of the shiny red kettle Felix smacked your hand away, him grabbing it instead.
“It’s hot and I can’t trust someone as stupid as you with it”
“I can grab a kettle you know? I’m not that weak-”
“Shut it”
You pressed your lips shut as Felix pressed himself against your back, carefully reaching and pouring in the steaming water and seeing the water droplets diffuse up into the atmosphere. He carefully put the lid back on the pot and backed away as he put the kettle back on the stove, turning it off.
“What do we do now?”
You asked, turning around and leaning your butt against the cold counter.
“We wait for 5 minutes, the steeping time is different for different teas, you’ll have to learn them when working here.”
You nod attentively, staring down at your shoes and turning your heels against the dark wooden floorboards.
“I wanna change the deal y/n”
Your head shot up to the blonde boy, him standing close by in all his glory, not wearing his school uniform but instead a black t-shirt, of course having a obnoxiously loud designer logo in the front just like the belt that was resting on top of his black slacks. His bracelets jingled everytime he moved his hands, this time wearing dainty silver rings to match with his wristwatch and shining piercings.
“W-what why? Are you gonna fire me?”
Blood was boiling in your veins, not knowing his intentions yet but knowing that they were just as sinister as the boy himself. Before you knew it his lips were attached on yours.
Your heart skipped a beat, knuckles whitening as you held onto the counter from sheer panic. His lips were softer than expected, pressing gently as he tilted his head, his eyelashes feathering over his closed lids. His hands traveled up your clothed body, exploring every inch of you. The soft sound of lips smacking against each other ignited a feeling deep in your core. You were pushed closer to the edge of the counter, his body so close, leaving you with no choice but to jump up on the metal surface. The coldness radiated through the thin fabric of your pleated skirt, hitting your aching cunt that was already dripping from Felix’s simple actions, his daunting aura clouding your mind with sinful thoughts.
“I’ll raise your pay if you fuck me, please y/n”
He whispers against your plush lips. You hummed, hesitating before slowly nodding, not being able to think clear with your heart beating like it’s about to protrude from your chest. He smiles slyly before reattaching his lips onto yours, his wet and sharp tongue running over your swollen bottom lip, desperatly wanting to taste your tongue. Your lips parted as you moaned into the kiss, giving him the perfect opportunity to pry himself into your mouth, the kiss getting sloppier, Felix growing needier as the seconds on the large clock on top of the door frame ticked. The blonde boy placed himself inbetween your legs, his veiny hands placed on your knees, seperating your already shivering legs. Without knowing what you were doing you cupped Felix’s cheeks, feeling the sharpness of his jaw against your soft hands.
Why did you pull him closer? He’d hurt you so bad in the past, everyday was living hell because of him and his deeds. A lightheadedness hit you as memories scrolled past your consciousness. Memories still painful, tender as open wounds. But for him you could forgive anything. Forget, just to see him smile at you.
His cologne was strangely addictive, the musky smell mixed with the scent of his soft sunkissed skin. You moaned softly against his lips as his fingers traced lightly over your exposed panties, the skirt already folded up your thighs. He hummed in delight, feeling the soaked fabric sticking against your pulsating cunt.
“I’ve waited for this for so long y/n”
You looked at him with confusion in your glossy eyes. Waited, for you?
Within a matter of seconds his fingers pushed aside the wet patch of fabric shielding you from the cold air, only to insert a finger inside of your desperate hole causing you to gasp. A second finger joined close by and Felix groaned, feeling your tight walls around his glistening digits. You had so many questions but not enough power to say them without stuttering.
“W-waited for,,, m-me?”
His fingers curled upwards as you finished your sentence causing you to grip his wrist, the squelching sound of your pussy pleasing the blonde boy as he pumped his fingers into you relentlessly.
“That’s how I get attention. You aren’t impressed by materialistic things so I did what I had to”
You couldn’t believe your ears. All that to get your attention? He succeeded but he would never understand the emotions you went through because of him. The hatered you thought would never melt away suddenly did, you becoming nothing more but a whimpering mess from his touch.
A thump was heard from your head hitting the cupboard, the pleasure firing through your body as your small cries echoed throughout the small kitchen. A sudden feeling of emptiness caused you to sigh in both relief and frustration. Your previously shut eyes slowly drifted open, panicked when you see Felix unbuckling his belt, letting both the fabric of his pants and underwear fall to the dim floor.
Somehow his leaking cock looked prettier this time around, the shiny piercing distracting to the eye. Your mouth watered embarrassingly enough, turning your gaze to the ticking clock until Felix cleared his throat, his adams apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed his spit. He looked nervous which was unfamilliar, the boy always being persistant with his cocky mannerisms. Felix pulled you closer to the edge of the counter, your face heating up as your legs were spread wide open for him. There was nowhere you could hide your flushed face and Felix took this to his advantage.
“Huh? Shy, babygirl?”
You gulped as you watched him stroke himself, the crimson colored tip disappearing only to reappear seconds later. Your eyes shut tightly as he moved the slick-stained panties to the side, anticipating to be filled to the brim from his impressive size. Mouth agape, Felix pushed into your wet hole, your hands gripping his broad shoulder in order to hinder a loud moan.
“fuck y/n,,, you’re so tight, s-shit”
You couldn’t answer, still adjusting your velvety walls around him. As the pain subsided your core ached for friction, needing to feel him deep inside of you. Your arms wrapped around the boy, pulling him closer to your heated body making him smirk slyly before carefully pulling away, only his tip resting inside of you. Just as you were about to sigh due to emptiness he slammed inside of you, your entire body shaking from the impact. Panting, you begged for more, begging for him to go faster.
“F-felix! faster,,, please”
Your warm face was buried deep in his shoulder, his slightly cold hands gripping your hips tightly, starting to roll against your throbbing cunt earning small mewls from between your swollen lips. The counter creaked with each thrust that grew louder as his pace got faster, feeling your delicate walls clench around his veiny length, his silver earrings dangling from his lobes. Felix explored parts of your body even you hadn’t felt, his dick prodding you deep enough to make your eyes roll back into your skull, biting down on his shirt.
The sound of skin slapping echoed in the room, your weakening legs wrapping around his figure, trapping him inside of you but the blonde boy had no plans of stopping. Sweat beaded around his temples, his previously serious expressing turning into a grin as he adored your moans, words falling out in incomprehensible syllables. You were close and so was Felix.
The pit of fire grew violent deep in your core, holding the young boy tighter to your body, clawing his clothed back. Every thrust had it’s impact, shaking you up and forcing shameless moans out from your throat that were being muffled by the fabric between your lips. The two of you moaned in unison, Felix’s deep mutters getting louder, his vicious thrusts becoming sloppier and uneven, desperate for his sweet release. You clenched around him involuntarily, trying to hold back from screaming, glad that your warm face was between his shoulder and neck so that he couldn’t see your fucked out expression. His name rolled off your tongue like a mantra, mind blank as your eyes were squeezed shut.
“Felix, i-im gonna c-cum! im-m cumming!”
The wall seperating you from your orgasm collapsed, leaving you with a powerful sensation washing over you. Your legs shook, struggling to keep your legs wrapped around him but soon enough you wouldn’t have to. Felix thrusted into you one final time, sending a shiver down your spine and overstimulating you before pulling out, his dick glistening with your erotic juices as he fucked his hand, hot spurts of cum leaking out. He growled, scrunching his forehead as he released on your shaking thighs, one last droplet of cum descending down his shaft and coating the shiny piercing that decorated his pretty cock.
You panted, still processing what just happened, looking at Felix that unwrapped his hand from around his member, dick turning flaccid. You lifted yourself off the counter, only then realising how weak your legs were, not letting go of the surface you just fucked on.
“Is this a one time thing or,,,”
You start, not really knowing what to say afterwards. Felix cleared his throat, putting on his pants as you fixed your dark skirt, back against the boy.
“Let’s be friends”
You turned around, gazing at Felix as he looked down at the grimy floor.
“I’ll stop,,, bothering you, now we’re friends,,, with benefits but it’s a secret, understand?”
Every sentence this man spoke sounded serious with his deep voice but this was serious, for real.
“Why should I? Why should I agree, Felix? So that you can play around with me even more, make me your little shy puppet? I’m not having it!!”
You yelled at the boy, his expression deadpan as you hit him in the abdomen, instantly regretting it as your knuckles hit his rock hard abs. Frustration clouded your mind, wanting to break every single piece of porcelain in the narrow kitchen. Instead you broke yourself apart. Crying in front of Felix like you’d done so many times before, dropping to the floor and feeling the cold material against your bare thigh. This feeling, so familiar. Felix gazing down on you like you we’re worth nothing more than the ground.
Only this time he didn’t only stand and stare.
His arms wrapped around your quivering figure, his embrace warmer than his face.
“I’m sorry, y/n”
His voice shook as the silence overtook the both of you, the quiet ticking of the clock interupting.
“Hm? Look at me, y/n”
Felix pulled away from you, sitting on the floor next to you, watching your head hang low as he gently put a hand on your jaw, lifting your gaze up to meet his.
“I’m fucking stupid, I know. I shouldn’t have hurt you like that but,,, I didn’t know how- how to get closer to you.”
He swiped the rough pad of his thumb across your cheek, wiping your tears.
“I will never hurt you ever again, y/n. We- we can work here and just,,, do stuff.”
You knew exactly what he meant by “stuff” but somehow you trusted him. You trusted him because you had no one else to trust.
“But one rule” he said.
You tilted your head, wondering what his rule was.
“No falling in love”
You hummed, nodding as you wiped your tearstained cheeks with the sleeves of your shirt, cracking a smile at your own vulnerability. Felix stood up and you looked up at him, feeling small but not afraid.
“So what do you say, y/n?”
He offered you his hand, you couldn’t stop looking into his secretive eyes that slowly turned mellow.
You grabbed his hand, passing it as a yes to his question.
But the both of you knew that the rule would be broken soon, like the brittle edge of a teacup.
#stray kids smut#stray kids fanfic#skz smut#stray kids imagines#stray kids drabbles#skzsmut#skz fanfic#skz imagines#lee felix smut#felix smut#stray kids x y/n#stray kids x reader#stray kids x stay#stray kids x female reader#skz x y/n#skz x stay#skz x reader#skz x you#kpop smut
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One Night Fuck Up: pt5
Juice Ortiz Imagine
pt1
masterlist
It was almost a full year since Juice found out he was a dad. There was a lot of difficulties to work through as you and Juice became co parents. It took you a while to trust him, he was a complete stranger at first. But Juice really proved himself and he was the best father to Anthony.
Co parenting was so easy to work out. Juice was more then willing to do anything for Ant and for you. It was really nice having him around. With raising your son together, Juice easily became your best friend in all of this.
Juice would watch Ant whenever you had work, no question asked even if it was an over night or rotating shift. He always told you if he was going to be away for a run or whatever club businesses. Sometimes Juice stayed all weekend at your house to spend time with Ant. Sometimes you let Juice take Ant for the weekend when he knew he had absolutely no club businesses to deal with.
It was perfect.
Juice was more excited then normal today. He loved his son, more then anything. He’s pretty sure his son taught him what love was. It was great seeing Anthony growing and learning. He was more and more like Juice everyday.
Juice quickly was wrapping up at the club house. He got everything he needed to do out the way. Sure he would still pick up calls from the club but he really hated having to make any runs when it was his time with his son.
“Where you in a rush too?” Happy asked as he watched his brother running around the club house with his book bag.
“With Ant this weekend.” Juice said with a smile. The club was more then supportive when finding out about Juice having a kid. They never let him live it down when they found about what the pool table part.
“staying at Y/N house?” Jax asked with a teasing smile. He knew how Juice felt about you. He didn't try to hide his feelings either but with learning to co parent together, starting anything romantic wasn’t a good idea.
“I feel like I’m forgetting something.” Juice said mumbling more to himself as he double checked everything. He felt like he was in a rush to see Ant and you. He parked his bike in your drive way in his usual place.
“Hey Y/N.” Juice said as he made his way in the house. He walked over to you placing a kiss to your cheek as you where busy in the kitchen.
“Hey Juice! You’re earlier.” You said smiling up at him. He was the father of you son, he quickly got comfortable sending so much time at your house. You liked having him around.
“Sorry, I should’ve called to let you know.” Juice said, he still felt like he was on eggshells around you. He didn’t want to cross a line and ruin everything. He wouldn’t know what to do if he lost you and Ant. You both where his family.
“No thank god your here. I’m running late and Ant’s been having a tantrum since last night.” You said making Juice laugh as you ran through the house.
“Daddy!” Juice heard a loud voice followed by tiny foot steps running through the hallway.
“Hey Ant.” He said easily picking up the three year old into his arms.
“Mama said you where being bad.” Juice said as he walked through the house. He felt so comfortable here, it felt more like home then his actual home. Well his dorm.
“I have left overs shrimp and rice in the fridge when you get hungry. Theres also a weird noise coming from the hall bathroom anytime you turn the sink on. I’ll be back probably early morning. or the middle of the night.” You said as you threw your hair in a bun already in your scrubs.
“I’ll have my phone, so call me if-” Juice caught you off by handing you the keys.
“I got it, don’t worry. ” Juice said leaning down placing a lingering kiss to your temple making your smile. You loved the extra attention Juice has been giving you. It was hard not to fall in love with him when he was literal perfect. He was such a gentleman. He took care of you and Anthony. He was an amazing father.
“You’re the best.” You said as you stood on your tippy toes and gave Anthony a big kiss on his forehead.
“Be good for daddy.” You said giving him a stern look. You see a big goofy grin on the toddler that he got from his father.
“No kiss for daddy?” Juice asked making you blush as you grabbed your things as you gave him a little glare.
“Well now what do you want to do today Ant?” Juice asked as he plopped down on the couch with the toddler. Any was more like his dad everyday, he was even picking up Juice’s habits the more time he spent with him.
It was a long day, or both you and Juice. The hospital was so short staffed you felt like you where doing the job of 4 different nurses. Juice had his hands full with Anthony bossing him around all day. From wanting to go to the park, to trying and help Juice fix the skin at the house. Anthony most definitely had Juice’s ADHD.
It was around 1 am, Juice was passed out laying in Ant’s small race car bed. He clearly didn’t fit his legs hanging off on the floor. Getting Ant to bed was a challenge every night. Juice had to tell him at least 4 different stories before Ant fell asleep on his chest.
You groaned as you walked into the house. It was spotless, like always. Juice always cleaned up, you didn’t want him to but he did either way. You smiled realizing he fixed a few things around the house as well.
“Juice?” You called out not seeing him on the couch. You walked into Ant rooms smiling when you found them cuddled up against each other. You quickly took picture of them knowing it was going to be your next background on your phone.
“Juice wake up.” You said shortly rubbing his shoulder.
“Y/N your home already?” Juice grumbled in a deep husky voice as he looked over at you in your scrubs. He easily picked up Ant as he got up leaving the toddler in the bed.
“Sorry I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Juice said as you both walked out the room.
“Thank you Juice.” You said giving him a big smile making him melt inside.
“You don’t got to say that. I love being here with him.” Juice said. He kept to himself that he loved being here when you where here too. This was the worst part, he hated leaving.
“Do you want coffee or something before you go?” You asked your eyes watching him desperately.
“That would be nice.” Juice said following you into the kitchen.
“How was work?” He asked as he watched you move around making a cup for you both.
“You know, stressful and busy.” You said as you hopped on the counter. Juice was leaning over watching you. He loved having moments like this alone with you.
“How was Ant today?” You asked Juice knowing there was always some good stories he would tell you.
“He’s been asking for a little brother to plat with. He told me I’m old and I’m not good at playing tag.” Juice said giving you that charming smile of his.
“Oh god.” you groaned covering your face as you felt it heat up.
“ I told him, maybe for Christmas.” Juice joked back only making your face redder. He knew exactly what he did to you.
“Juice!” You yelled smacking his arms only making him laugh.
“Have you thought about having more kids? in the future you know. If you meet someone.” Juice asked feeling his heart get heavy.
“I’ve never thought about it. I never really thought about meeting someone and letting them into Ants life like that.” You said as you watched Juice. What you would give to be able to read his mind.
“Have you ever thought about us?” Juice asked, as he stepped closer to you. He was standing between your legs as you sat on top of the counter.
“I have Juice. Your an amazing father. Honestly you take care of me too. I don’t know what I would do without you now.” You told him looking in his brown warm eyes.
“I would like to stop pretending to play family. I want to be here all the time for Anthony, for you. I don’t want to have to leave. This feels like my home. You both are my home.” Juice admitted his hand coming to rest on your cheek. It was warm to the touch as Juice admitted his feeling to you.
“Can I take you to dinner friday?” Juice asked only making you laugh.
“I would love that, now kiss me Juice.” You said pulling your arms around his neck pulling him back to you. His large hands rested on your thighs as your legs locked around him. The kiss was painfully slow, as you both enjoyed the feeling of having the other against them.
“Maybe Ant could get a little brother or sister.” Juice mumbled into your lips making you laugh. He always knew how to make you laugh no matter what.
#juice ortiz x reader#juice ortiz#juice ortiz imagine#juice ortiz fanfiction#juice Ortiz series#juice x reader#soa juice#sons of anarchy#sons of anarchy fanfiction#sons of anarchy imagine#sons of anarchy fanfic#jax teller imagine#jax teller#jax teller fanfiction#soa#soa jax#soa fanfiction#soa smut#theo rossi#theo rossie fandom#theo rossi imagine#theo rossi fanfic#imagine#mayans#mayans imagine#mayans fanfic
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41. “Dance with me.”
59. “I’m still sore from last night.”
ceo!yoongi x reader
w.c: 1.6k
warnings: a little suggestive if you like squint, sweet teeth numbing fluff
note: please please let me know your thoughts, it helps me out a lot. Also send in a drabble request hehehe.
masterlist || drabble game
Yoongi loved mornings.
Yoongi loved mornings more, now that the two of you had finally moved in together after years of dancing around the subject. He loved waking up next to you, with your face buried into the side of his body and your tiny snores escaping your dry chapped lips, echoing against the eggshell walls of the room. He loved the way the thin rays of the morning sun peek through the slits of the blackout curtains. The light dancing against your body, illuminating all his favorite features. Which was all of you. He loved the way you would stir, and he would race against time to shut his eyes before you could catch him starring at you.
You always did.
You will never let him know that you knew he always woke up first to love you silently without you or anyone in the world there to interrupt him. It was his most valuable and cherished secret, the only one he kept from you. So, you vowed to take the fact that you knew about it to the grave.
Today though, you had beat him at his own game. You had woken up first, silently watching as his breath was calm and concentrated. The minuscule stress lines that had appeared throughout his face over the years of overwork, nowhere to be seen. He looked peaceful, younger; like he didn’t carry the entire weight of the world on his shoulders.
Despite cherishing his sleep more than anything in the world, you understood now, why he always woke up first. He looked so beautiful, so raw, so intimate, so vulnerable, like a work of art. And you could hope that he felt the same way.
You found yourself never wanting to take your eyes away from his sleeping form, afraid you would miscount the intervals between his inhales and his exhales. Afraid you would miss the way his lips parted in inaudible snores or the way he would pout whenever he moved. Yet, the clock on his bedside table thought otherwise.
8:30am
Last night, you had made a promise to yourself before falling asleep, that you would wake up early to make him breakfast. It was his day off, the office didn’t need their big bad CEO that never once seemed to crack a smile, even if he was impressed or excited. You never understood why he kept such a fake front for his employees when they knew that he was the biggest softy on the planet, especially when it came to his loved ones. He would turn heaven and hell over if it meant he could protect everyone he loved. He would even sacrifice himself to ensure that nothing ever happened to his friends, family, and you. But you supposed that his fleeting image was all part of his job, so you let him be.
You took one last look at your sleeping boyfriend, biting your lower lip, contemplating on whether you should just stay in bed until he woke up. Or get up to prepare him a whole breakfast feast just like he deserved. You almost picked the first option until your stomach grumbled lowly, indicating that the second option was the better option, unfortunately. So, you got up silently, and carefully, afraid that any wrong move would wake him up and ruin your surprise.
The air in your lungs got caught in the back of your throat as you saw him stir slightly. Sleepy incoherent mumbles fell out of his lips. You froze in fear, your robe midway on, watching as he tugged the sheets up to his chin and sunk further into the bed. When you realized he wasn’t getting up anytime soon you finished putting on your robe and quickly made your way into the kitchen.
“You know it’s my day off right?” Yoongi mumbled as he walked into the kitchen, sweatpants low on his hips, his messy hair sticking up in all different directions. A slight blush appeared on your cheeks when you remembered how your fingers had been tangled up in it, as you screamed out his name like a mantra, while he made love to you until the late morning hours.
“And you don’t have to be at work for another three hours.” He wrapped his arms around your waist and gave your temple a sweet kiss, “good morning honey, how’d you sleep?” He rested his head against your shoulder, clinging onto you like he was afraid you would vanish.
“I slept like a baby.” You smiled cutting the last stem of the strawberry you had diligently been working on before he walked in. “Morning to you too sleepy head.” You turned your face, leaving a delicate kiss against his bed head. Yoongi smiled, he loved waking up next to you, admiring you silently as you slept. But he also loved being wrapped up in your warmth as you went around doing your daily morning routine. You always complained about how he never let you get things done. That the extra weight clinging onto you like a koala was only slowing you down. He knew you secretly loved it and would not be able to go about your day peacefully if he just stopped.
In fact, he had tested it out once after the two of you had gotten into a petty fight. You had called him that day at lunch time in tears, claiming that everything had gone wrong because he had ignored you all morning. Truth be told he had felt the same way. That was the day he truly realized that he could never live without you.
“I was hoping you would wake up after I finished making breakfast.” You pouted putting your knife down and gathering all the strawberries you had tentatively cut up putting them into a bowl.
“And I was hoping we could spend the entire morning in bed, but we can’t always get what we want in life can we?” He mumbled against your clothed shoulder. His fingers cheekily playing with the knot of your robe.
You turned in his arms, “all morning? Doing what?” Your arms made their way around his neck pulling him closer.
Yoongi smirked, his fingers itching to untie your robe praying you weren’t wearing anything underneath. “I have a few ideas, some good, some bad. But I mostly just wanted to keep sleeping with you in my arms.” He shrugged, running his tongue along his bottom lip, wetting it before closing the distance and planting a soft, intimate kiss against your lips.
It was savory, enough to keep you on your toes, wanting for more when he pulled away. “Good because I’m still sore from last night.” You said pointedly. Yoongi threw his head back laughing, his chest swelling up with pride as he remembered how you didn’t want to stop after three rounds. Even begging him, getting down on your knees for him in the shower. The two of you still hadn’t christened your newly shared apartment but he was positive that last night would’ve been the night if you hadn’t fallen asleep.
“That’s on you my little minx, you didn’t want to stop, I just fulfilled your desires.” He winked, kissing your cheek and moved aside, an arm still around your waist as he reached over for the Bluetooth speaker he kept in the kitchen.
“Hey!” You scoffed, hitting his chest lightly, “this isn’t completely on me, you came home and didn’t even let me greet you properly before you were carrying me off to our room.”
“Honestly babe, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He smirked as he scrolled through his phone. His eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he looked through his music selection.
“We’re going to have to work on that memory of yours. It's starting to worry me.” You said in fake concern and circled your arms around his waist pulling him close, “I can help.” You whispered before planting a small kiss on the blooming flowers you had left on his chest last night. You could never get enough of him.
“Mhm, I’ll take you up on your offer later.” He set his phone down on the kitchen counter, the soft melody of an unfamiliar song sounding through his Bluetooth speaker. “Right now, dance with me?” He tilted his head to the side. He didn’t give you enough time to answer when he was already leading you to the middle of the kitchen, his arms finding their perspective place around your waist as he started swaying the two of you in place.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, giving his nose a tiny peck, earning a boyish smile from Yoongi. “What is this?”
“A song Namjoon and I are working on...for our wedding.” The afterthought falling out his lips before he had time to stop it. It wasn’t until he felt your body go rigid in his arms that he realized what he had said. “Um, forget I said that.”
“We just moved in together and you’re already planning our wedding playlist, I didn’t think you would be the type. What’s next you’re going to show me the Pinterest board you created?” You joked ignoring the way your heart was racing, hoping he couldn’t feel it through the thinness of your silk robe.
He groaned, annoyed. So what? Maybe he did have a Pinterest board with ideas for your wedding. He had been adding pictures to it since he met you five years ago at Junkook’s grand opening for his art gallery. The second he spotted you laughing along with his best friend, hard enough for champagne to come out of your nose. The ice around his heart melted and he knew he would be spending the rest of his life with you. He’s been writing songs about it ever since.
“Maybe another time, we have enough time for that, right now we have two hours before you have to go to work and I plan on milking every second of it.”
#kdiarynet#kpopscape#bts fanfiction#bts imagines#bts fluff#bts scenarios#bts drabbles#bts fanfic#bts x reader#bts yoongi#bts suga#yoongi fluff#yoongi fanfiction#yoongi imagines#yoongi drabbles
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1 STEP FORWARD, 3 STEPS BACK // D.M
[female reader, based on the Olivia Rodrigo song 1 step forward, 3 steps back]
Called you on the phone today
Just to ask you how you were
All I did was speak normally
Somehow I still struck a nerve
It was a cold winter morning and the weather made the tip of your nose turn red and made your fingers feel like ice. You tightened your scarf and rubbed your hands together, trying to create warmth, as you walked across the courtyard.
Finally approaching the great hall, your eyes scanned across the bustling room, until your eyes finally fell on a very familiar mop of platinum blonde locks.
You made your way over to your boyfriend and sat in the free space in between him and Theodore Nott. You placed a gentle kiss on his cheek as you sat on the bench. "How are you this morning, Draco?" You asked in your usual soft tone
Unfortunately, all you got in return was a look up and down, a deep sigh and watching wipe the spot on his flawless face you had just kissed. You pinned it on his bad moods that seemed to be a lot more frequent than usual.
You blinked back the tears brimming in your eyes and turned to talk tho Theodore instead. He was always perfectly kind to you.
You got me fucked up in the head, boy
Never doubted myself so much
Like, am I pretty? Am I fun, boy?
I hate that I give you power over that kind of stuff
When you fist joined Hogwarts, you always had a smile on your face and a spring in your step. You were the type of person people naturally gravitated towards, always very forgiving. You couldn't care less what anyone else though.
And even though you may not have noticed at first, the person you once were slowly changed once you began dating Draco Malfoy.
You found yourself staring in the mirror for a few minutes longer than usual, comparing yourself to other people, even your own best friends. You were slowly changing your ways all so that you could please your boyfriend as much as possible.
Although you would never admit it, you hate that he has power over that kind of stuff.
'Cause it's always one step forward and three steps back
I'm the love of your life until I make you mad
It's always one step forward and three steps back
Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy, I don't understand
No, I don't understand
Sometimes, when Draco was in a good mood, you would go for picnic dates by the black lake, where you would lay together in the sun. Talk, laugh eat and sometimes lay in a comfortable silence.
However, the next day you would come crashing back down from cloud nine when you would walk into the great hall and be ignored or find him with his arm around another girl, the same angelic laugh suffocating your senses as yesterday. Only this time he wasn't laughing with you. You didn't even know he was laughing at you.
You were always walking on eggshells around Draco, always double checking what you were about to say in your head before speaking aloud.
Sometimes you would be hanging out with his friends, sitting as close as possible to eachother, laughing and joking. This bliss would last until you would say something wrong. He would kick you out your own common room, telling you to "go to bed." because you've "ruined the fun again.". Sympathetic smiles offered from his friends.
You never understood him, and you soon came to terms with the fact that you probably never would.
And maybe in some masochistic way
I kinda find it all exciting
Like, which lover will I get today?
Will you walk me to the door or send me home cryin'?
Before Draco, your previous relationships had been predictable. You had always craved something more, someone who would keep you on your toes. That's exactly what Draco Malfoy was.
Whenever you went out with him, you never knew exactly which Draco Malfoy persona you would be meeting today. Would he cherish every moment with you and let you fall asleep in his arms or treat you like dirt under his shoe and send you home crying.
No, it's back and forth, did I say something wrong?
It's back and forth, goin' over everything I said
It's back and forth, did I do something wrong?
It's back and forth, maybe this is all your fault
Months into your relationship with Draco, your best friend also got a boyfriend. You saw the way she was treated. Hello and goodbye kisses, sweet nicknames, holding hands and whispering "I love you" whenever possible. Soon enough, you saw the true colours of your relationship.
This were the events that lead you to the point where our knuckles met the hard material of Draco's door for the last time.
He swung open the door, wearing only a pair of black joggers, his hair was wet and messy and his featured were as defined as ever. His attractiveness only making your job harder.
"Come in."He said in a monotone voice.
"No, it's okay. This won't take long."
"Alright, have it your way then." He muttered.
"We're over." You watched as the colour drained from his face and the cocky look on his face changed to a more vulnerable one.
"No. Wh-what do you mean. Y/N/N, you know I lov-"
"NO." you shouted. You drew in a breath, calming yourself down. "no Draco. You don't get to say that now. Not when I've loved you with everything in me only to get nothing back. So please, don't tell me you love me, because nothing can take back what you've done to me."
You shoved the box you were carrying in your arms into his chest, causing him to stumble back a bit.
"I hope one day you find someone who waits around long enough for you to get your shit together, because merlin knows I couldn't. Have a nice life Draco."
You turned around. took a deep breath and began to walk back down the hall, before his voice stopped you once again.
"Y/N." He spoke. "I um, I really am sorry. For everything. I hope you find someone who treats you properly, because merlin knows I couldn't." He repeated in a whisper.
You mustered up a small smile.
——————
That was 15 years ago. Now, you were sitting with your little girl on your knee, both dressed in dark green gowns, with your beautiful. loving husband, Theodore Nott sat next to you.
You were watching Draco Malfoy marry Astoria Greengrass, a stunning woman who waited around long enough for Draco Malfoy to learn to love properly.
It was 9 o'clock when you and Theo decided to leave. You walked up, hands linked together as per usual, while your daughter slept peacefully in his arms. You walked up to the newly wed couple and Theo immediately fell into a hushed conversation with Astoria, leaving you and Draco to chat.
"Y/N"
"Draco."
"It's great to see you again."
"It's great to see you again." You both spoke at the same time, causing you both to laugh, quickly followed by shushing noises from Theo and Tori.
"You deserve this Draco. I'm proud of you."
"Thank you Y/N/N, I wanted to thank you, for making me see my mistakes. Without you I don't think I'd be here right now, married. So thank you, really."
"None of this was me, Draco. It was all you."
You held eye contact for a few seconds before you both pulled eachother into a tight hug, staying there for a minute or so.
"Love you, Y/N/N."
"Love you too, Draco."
"Stay in touch?" He asked.
"Of course." You replied.
You pulled Astoria into a hug, congratulating her on her marriage, telling her to keep in touch, before Taking Theo's hand in your own. He gave you a quick kiss before leaving the wedding, with a guarantee you would be falling asleep in his arms.
#draco#dracomalfoy#malfoy#angst#draco x reader#draco angst#draco malfoy angst#draco x reader angst#draco x y/n#draco x y/n angst#draco malfoy#theodore nott#astoria greengrass#theo nott x reader#draco malfoy x astoria greengrass
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bad guy | tsukki
“There was no place in heaven for someone like him. But damn it, Tsukishima would do his best to earn his place with you.”
pairing: tsukki x reader
warnings: angst angst angst akjsjkskja slight fluff at the end tho
wc: too many i think jk 2127
Tsukishima has never claimed to be a good person.
He’s arrogant and mean. He’s never been the openly kind and caring type. He had a nasty habit of provoking people, and often found himself rather enjoying making fun of them. He’s also been told that he intimidates people very easily. Tsukishima is pretty sure these things don’t make him your usual run-of-the-mill good boy. He didn’t gain the nickname ‘Suckyshima’ among his teammates and friends for nothing.
But at the very least, he’s always thought that when it really mattered, one could find goodness at his core.
He knew you believed it, too. He could see it in your eyes; could hear it in the tone of your voice, the way you spoke to him; could sense it in the way you relaxed your shoulders and laughed so easily around him. Tsukishima never understood why. Nobody has gotten close to him as easily as you did— not even Yamaguchi. You were, by all accounts, his polar opposite. You only ever had kind words, and rarely scowled at anybody. You were polite, sweet, and his mother just adored you. You had sharp edges too, sure. Everyone did. But you were the goodest person he knew.
Which is why it kept him awake, every night, remembering what he did to you.
“What are you talking about?” you asked, trailing after him as he walked away from the gym. There was a tremble in your voice and he hated it. “I don’t understand why you’re being like this, Kei.”
“I’m saying this as simply as I can,” he replied over his shoulder. “I don’t want to be with you anymore.”
“But why?” He could hear your footsteps coming closer. “You just keep repeating that, but you don’t tell me why.” He felt a hand wrap around his wrist, tugging him backwards. Tsukishima sighed and stopped in his tracks. He wasn’t sure he’d make it out of this alive if he turned to look at your face. So he didn’t. He shook your hand away, sighing.
“Don’t you love me anymore?” Tsukishima was completely certain you were crying.
“No, I don’t.” He replied. Tsukishima heard your breath hitch, and his heart stopped. He hated this. He hated this.
“No,” you told him. “I don’t believe you, Kei. I don’t believe it.”
“Fine,” Tsukishima said, pushing himself forward. “Don’t believe me. I don’t care.”
You lunged after him, throwing your arms around his waist. Tsukishima’s breath stopped. “I don’t believe you Kei,” you repeated, tightening your grip. “Not for one second.”
He took a breath and spun around, mustering as much strength as he could in that millisecond. “What’s wrong with you?” He spat, pushing you away in one swift motion. “Don’t believe me, that’s fine. But I’m telling the truth, I don’t want to be with you anymore.”
“You’re a liar, Kei,” your voice was just barely above a whisper now. Tsukishima was almost certain this was worse than having you yell at him. “Look at me. Look me in the eyes. And tell me that again.”
“I don’t owe you anything,” he replied, trying to keep his voice from trembling too. “But if this will make you stop, sure.” He took a breath. “I’m tired. No, I’m exhausted. Between you and volleyball, I just can’t keep up. You always expect so much of me, and you never leave me alone. Do you know how tiring it is to be with someone who constantly needs reassurance? Who always needs me around? I’m sorry, I just can’t do this anymore. I don’t want to be with you anymore. ”
He was sure that the look in your eyes at that very moment would haunt him for the rest of his life. Tsukishima has never hated himself as much as he did right then.
“Fine,” you muttered. “That’s fine. I understand.”
Tsukishima turned on his heel and silently walked away from you. This was the worst thing he had ever done. If he’s ever believed that there was any good in him before, now he was certain there was none.
Tsukishima tried to convince himself that it was the right thing to do. If you hated him, it would be easier for you to move on. You would be free. You’d be better off without him. He’s never been any good for you in the first place anyway. He couldn’t give you what you deserved.
It’s been three weeks since that evening. Tsukishima had become angrier, more bitter. He could tell from the way his teammates walked on eggshells around him. Kageyama wasn’t snarky with him and Hinata brushed off his back handed comments. Bokuto had tried reaching out to him, odd as that was. Daichi and Sugawara had tried to talk to him too, but he brushed them off. He knew they all meant well, but they wouldn’t be able to make it go away anyway. There was no grace in heaven for someone like him.
Tsukishima only ever saw you in the halls. When Yamaguchi made excuses not to walk home with him after practice, Tsukishima knew he was going to meet with you. He tried to tell himself it didn’t bother him. Maybe you and Yamaguchi would fall in love. The thought made his chest tight and his throat burn, but Yamaguchi was better for you than he could ever be. It wouldn’t be so bad. It didn’t bother him. It was better this way— or at least, that’s what he told himself.
But it did bother him. All of it did. It bothered Tsukishima that Yamaguchi got to look at you, hear your laughter, walk you home, and do all these things with you that Tsukishima would never get to do again. It bothered him that you would never look at him without sadness in your eyes ever again. It bothered him that he knew he would never love anyone else, because he would rather be lonely than hurt anyone again— than hurt like this again.
Tonight, it bothered Tsukishima that his hands were cold. He shoved his hands as deep in his pockets as he could. He thought about stepping inside Coach Ukai’s store for a bit, maybe warming his hands and belly with a meat bun. But even as he was a good distance away from the store, Tsukishima could already hear the bellowing laughter of his teammates. He knew that if he stepped inside, the laughter would slowly quiet down and they would start throwing him these sympathetic looks. He didn’t want to spoil their fun. So he kept walking.
Tsukishima kept his eyes trained on the road in front of him. The music streaming in from his headphones blocked out pretty much most of the sounds around him, keeping him locked inside his head. That was fine. If he was lucky, a car would come crashing towards him and he wouldn’t be able to notice until it was too late.
That’s why he didn’t even notice you until you were right in front of him.
Tsukishima stopped dead in his tracks. Those shoes were very familiar. He looked up at you, his heart thumping in his ears.
“Hello, Kei,” you said, slowly. The gentleness of your voice took him aback. Tsukishima spent many late nights imagining what it would be like to run into you for the first time since the breakup. He imagined you would either completely ignore him, or yell at him. He wasn’t sure which was worse, but he knew for sure that he deserved both from you. He wasn’t expecting this, though.
“Have you been well?” No, he hasn’t. Tsukishima found himself unable to speak. He averted his gaze, feeling the shame crawl up his spine. Even without looking at you, he knew you would be wringing your hands behind your back— it’s what you did whenever you were nervous. He knew you would have your hair done the same way it’s always been, pushed up your forehead with a ribbon and falling down your shoulders. He knew exactly how beautiful you would be, even under the dim yellow light of the street lamp. And most of all, he knew there would be tears in your eyes. So, no matter how much he wanted to meet your gaze, he didn’t.
“Alright then,” you conceded after a few seconds without a reply from Tsukishima. “It was nice seeing you, Kei.”
You stepped sideways in an effort to avoid him, but as you walked past, Tsukishima’s arm shot out. His hand desperately wrapped around your wrist. He hated how much it reminded him of how you did the same thing the night you broke up. His heart had risen up to his throat, and he felt like he was going to vomit. Tsukishima couldn’t breathe. He didn’t know what he was doing, but he didn’t want you to leave.
“I haven’t,” he croaked. “I haven’t been well.”
You looked up at him, surprised. Tsukishima’s cheeks burned, suddenly feeling silly for acting on impulse. He let go of your wrist. “I’m sorry,” he said, finally looking at you. “I don’t know what came over me.”
“It’s alright..” you said, slowly. “I haven’t been well, either.”
Looking at you hurt him. You looked so small and fragile, standing in front of him with that look on your face. It made his chest constrict, and he hated that he was the reason you looked so downcast. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. Before he knew it, his feet propelled him forward, carrying him away from you. Apparently, this was all he knew how to do. Walk away.
Tsukishima couldn’t sleep that night. He tossed and turned, replaying every second of your earlier interaction in his head. The image of you, small and vulnerable in front of him, was burned into the back of his eyelids. He couldn’t stand seeing how he’d hurt you. But somehow, he couldn’t stop picturing it. Part of him knew he needed to make it right, that he needed to apologize. An even bigger part wanted to take it all back. To beg for your forgiveness, to say, screw it— everything’s just no good without you. And if you would still have him, he would do everything in his power to deserve you.
But he knew he had no right to do any of that. Tsukishima sat up and put his head in his hands. This must be what going crazy feels like.
Tsukishima pulled on a hoodie, and made his way downstairs. He slipped into his sneakers, convincing himself he’d just go for a walk. Only to clear his head. But he’s never really been good at convincing himself. Before he knew it, his feet were taking him down a familiar path. One he’d walked countless times before. And he couldn't seem to stop. He only did when he came up right at your door.
“Kei, it’s two in the morning,” you swung the door open, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. Tsukishima looked at you, and it occurred to him that he didn’t know the right words to say.
“It’s cold tonight, huh,” he said, shoving his hands sheepishly into his pockets.
“Yeah…” you answered, rubbing your arms to keep warm.
“It’s been like this ever since that day,” Tsukishima continued, nodding to himself. “Cold as winter, every single day. I mean, not literally, but like, that’s how it felt…” he couldn’t believe what he was saying. He shouldn’t be here. But it’s too late to turn back now. He swallowed the lump in his throat. “That’s how it felt to not have you in my life.”
“Kei…” tears were welling up in your eyes.
“And I’m sorry,” Tsukishima continued. “I’m sorry for everything that I said. I didn’t mean any of it.” He took a deep breath.
“Then why—”
“I was terrified.” Tsukishima could feel the wind brushing against his face and pulled his hood up. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him look this vulnerable.
“I love you so much,” his voice was soft. “The stars pale in comparison to how much I do.” His breath hitched, and he could feel tears welling up in his eyes. “And I didn’t think I was good enough for you.” Tsukishima chuckled bitterly. “I was right.”
“Oh, Kei..” you reached out for him, taking his face in your hands. It was the first time you’d ever seen the great Tsukishima Kei cry. “I’ll spend the rest of my life being sorry that I hurt you,” he whispered. “And if you’ll let me, I’ll spend every day making it up to you.” There was no place in heaven for someone like him. But damn it, Tsukishima would do his best to earn his place with you.
#haikyuu#haikyu x reader#haikyuu x reader#tsukishima x reader#tsukishima kei#tsukki#tsukki x reader#haikyuu!!#yamaguchi tadashi#haikyuu angst#haikyuu fluff#tsukishima angst#pain#just so much pain
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Chan Request!!
Pairing: Fem!Reader x Chan
Warnings: Language and Mature Content (Not really smut since the request didn’t seem to ask for it)
Genre: Idol AU
Request:
A/N: lots of people seemed interested in this one so...
When you woke-up that morning, you immediately reached out to the left on instinct, expecting contact with another sleeping form. It was your first sign that something was wrong, fingers ghosting through empty air, and you peeled your eyes open to confirm that Chan was already gone.
You grimaced at the faint flicker of irritation in the pit of your stomach because this was the third morning in a row in which Chan had left with no prior warning. The pattern was getting old.
Did he think you wouldn’t notice?
Of course you were bound to notice. Chan was supposed to be your partner. That invited a level of trust and transparency that simply couldn’t excuse these continued absences when you needed him.
It didn’t used to be this way, especially at the beginning of your relationship. For the longest time, you had both tried to hide it from the rest of the group, especially knowing that your manager’s would disapprove, but it was hard to lie when Seungmin accidentally walked in on you and Chan with the latter’s cock down your throat.
Still, the honeymoon phase of your relationship lasted for a long time, and even when you had problems along the way, you and Chan always managed to work things out.
It was the best part of your deep connection, but recognizing how distant he had grown lately made you reconsider everything. There was a point when you could hardly leave your bed without Chan finding a way to initiate something like getting each other off or managing a quickie with Chan’s hand placed over your mouth to keep your moans to a minimum.
Frowning, you forced yourself to leave the lingering warmth of your bed sheets, squeezing your legs into skin-tight jeans, abandoned on the floor from when you had quickly thrown off your clothes before going to sleep last night.
It was another unpleasant reminder of Chan because after waiting hours for Chan to come home, you figured he had decided to spend the night at the studio. But you were vastly mistaken when he slunk into your room at around 4:00 in the morning, whispering a greeting to you after sliding under the sheets. You had slept more soundly once his arm was around your waist, deluding yourself into believing that you could forgive him for staying out so late.
Especially since Chan worked so hard to produce the songs that decorated your group’s track listings, and with the album deadline approaching for the end of the month, he was practically working himself into the ground,
There was also very little time in his overcrowded schedule left for you, and that certainly didn’t bode well for how much you longed for Chan between your legs....
“Y/N! Breakfast is ready!”
“Coming,” you shouted back at the door, annoyed that someone had interrupted your daydream fantasies.
Especially since it was the closest you had been to Chan in weeks.
It was probably Jisung’s interruption since he insisted on being the annoying little brother you could rarely escape, but it wasn’t his fault that you were in such a bad mood.
“Good morning,” he immediately chirped when you opened the door, gaze bright with mischief.
You grumbled a greeting in return to your bandmate. “Why are you on the girl’s side of the dorm?”
Jisung scoffed. “Oh, so Chan can have all the access he wants, but I’m the one scolded for just saying hello?”
You rolled your eyes at his tone. “Whatever. Who cooked this morning?”
“Felix did,” Jisung replied, and you perked up a bit knowing that one of your youngest group mates had taken the time to flex his impressive cooking skills - it had to be better than Changbin’s attempt at frying eggs.
“Let’s go,” you said, dragging a petulant Jisung behind you as you both sauntered down the staircase together, joining the others in the part of the house where everything opened up into the common area.
Your managers didn’t mind so much when you were all together in the shared space of the living room and kitchen, but that certainly didn’t stop unmitigated romps between your male and female colleagues.
Your group was a rarity in the music world: comprised of twelve members, including eight of the boys and three of your closest girl pals who had all agreed to audition with you on an unforgettable summer afternoon.
The fact that you were all accepted into the same company, under the same group name, was even more of a blessing in disguise. You could always rely on them whenever you needed advice, and you had steadily grown closer to the rest of the guys over the years.
Next month marked your fifth-year anniversary (it concurred with your 1st-year anniversary with Chan), and your group was planning to release an album to celebrate, including some previously unreleased gems that Chan had kept hidden on his computer’s hard drive.
Everyone was excited, but the tension of trying to be the best and accomplish everything on time was always weighing heavily on all of your group mates’ shoulders.
Chan was, of course, taking it worst of all, and you were seething beneath the surface when you spotted him at the table sitting between Changbin and Hyunjin, eating breakfast with his eyes glued to his phone screen.
Why didn’t Chan ask you to come to breakfast with him?
“Y/N’s here,” Jisung announced, abandoning your side for his usual spot between Lisa and Sana.
Several of your group members mumbled greetings, but you were disappointed to discover that Chan hadn’t even looked up from his phone.
“Thanks, Felix,” you whispered when you sat down next to the blonde-haired singer, immediately peeling into the croissant that he served you.
“Is everyone coming to the studio later?” Minho asked, summoning your attention. “We need to go over the choreo one more time.”
Your muscles screamed in protest, but you reluctantly nodded your head. Meanwhile, Jisung let out an exaggerated groan at the thought of another six-hour practice.
“You need it the most,” Minho teased him, and you smiled at the good-natured jab between the two.
At the same time, you watched as Chan rose from his seat, depositing his plate into the sink. You rose to meet him halfway to the door where he stuffed his arms into the sleeves of his leather jacket.
“Chan, do you have plans tonight?” you sheepishly inquired, wincing when you realized how ridiculous it was for you to walk on eggshells around your boyfriend and group mate.
“Busy,” he grumbled, and he didn’t even bother to look in your direction on his way out the door.
Later on at practice, there was an obscene amount of sweat in places where it shouldn’t be, and you were just about tired of Chan’s constant criticism.
For the entirety of your dance practice, Chan had taken every opportunity to berate your group members for even the most minor of mistakes, including your own.
“Y/N!” Chan barked, and you flinched at his harsh tone, sucking in deep breaths to satiate your demanding lungs. “We’ve been practicing this for weeks!”
It was the fifth time that he had stopped the song at the introduction of the chorus - the part where you were supposed to do a backflip into frame.
Apparently, Chan thought that your form was sloppy, and you bit your tongue to snap back at him. Obviously, he couldn’t seem to comprehend that you were hurting, and he was forcing everyone to endure hour after hour of constant movement.
“Get your head on straight!” Chan insisted, and for some peculiar reason, it wasn’t anger or frustration with Chan that had you pausing.
It was a far more heart-wrenching combination:
Sadness.
Bitterness.
Shame.
They bombarded you all at once, and you barely managed to swallow back the onset of tears before you were storming out of the practice room, ignoring Chan’s calls of your name.
It was instinctual for you to find refuge in the empty studio rooms on the top floor of your company building - where most people tended to avoid.
You could always find solace in the quiet between four walls, pressing down against the keys of the electric keyboard attached to the big, fancy computer monitor.
The same tedious note played over and over again, but it seemed like the perfect metaphor for your life at that moment.
Especially your relationship with Chan.
But the silence was never permanent, and you used the sleeve of your jacket to wipe away the fresh evidence of tears when you heard the door to the studio room opening.
You immediately turned around, heart-sinking in your chest when you realized that it was Changbin instead of Chan.
“Hey, Binnie,” you said, feeling his gaze on you as he entered the empty studio room.
“What happened earlier?” he asked, always blunt and straight to the point as he drug a chair closer to where you sat.
“Just frustration,” you said.
“With yourself?” Changbin asked, but his tone left much to be imagined, and you grinned at his astuteness.
“With Chan too.”
“Yeah,” Changbin nodded - like it made perfect sense. “I can tell.”
“He’s been preoccupied with the album,” you said. “I get that it’s more important than me.”
“Hey!” Changbin protested. “You know that’s not true.”
His soft and sympathetic tone almost made you start crying afresh. “He doesn’t have time for me anymore.”
Changbin was quiet, studying you intently. “Chan gets wrapped up in what he’s doing too easily. It’s like this zone for him, and nothing else is allowed in that zone except for music and lyrics.”
“So, there’s no space for me?”
“I think there should be,” Changbin countered. “And you need to tell him that.”
You sighed at the thought of confronting Chan after everything that had happened earlier. “I don’t know...”
“Be honest with him, Y/N,” Changbin said, and he reached out to squeeze your hand in reassurance. “Everyone knows that Chan loves you more than anything.”
“He has a funny way of showing it,” you scoffed.
“So tell him that,” Changbin said - like it could be so simple.
Or....maybe it was?
That night, you knocked on Chan’s bedroom door twice before entering at his gentle inquiry.
“Hey,” you said, hesitating in the doorway.
“Y/N,” Chan said, and you were surprised to see him close the laptop screen, patting the empty spot next to you on the mattress. “Come here.”
You swallowed hard, forcing your feet into gear as they brought you to his bedside. “I didn’t want to bother you-”
“You’re not,” Chan said, and his gaze was chastened as he sighed. “Changbin talked to me earlier...”
“Of course he did,” you grumbled, planting yourself next to him.
“Yeah...” Chan trailed off again. “I guess I owe you an apology.”
You frowned. “For what exactly? Seems like I’m the one who got in the way. Guess you haven’t really needed me these past few weeks.”
“Are you kidding, Y/N?” Chan frowned, leaning up to kiss you suddenly and unexpectedly. “Of course I always need you.”
You could barely contain your smile, pulling apart to sigh happily at his reassurance. “It’s just...I know we have the album, but I thought we could still do the little things like we used to.”
Chan nodded, gaze contemplative. “I’ve been ignoring you without even realizing it.”
You allowed your eyes to fall. “And in practice today...”
“That was uncalled for,” Chan interrupted. “I should’ve never raised my voice. The stress I’m feeling shouldn’t punish everyone else...especially you.”
His tone was earnest, and you could feel your shoulders dropping with every word. “Changbin was the one who said I should talk to you.”
“He was right,” Chan said, leaning in closer again. “You can always come to me, yeah?”
“I really didn’t feel like I could,” you admitted.
“Then that’s my fault,” Chan said. “It’s something I need to work on cuz’ we’re in this together, Y/N.
He smiled then. “You aren’t getting rid of me anytime soon.”
You giggled at his teasing. “I can’t help it that I like you so much.”
“The feeling’s mutual,” Chan whispered, eyelids drooping when he watched you move your hand against his thigh, coming to rest at the interesting outline at the front of his sweatpants.
“I’ve also really needed you.”
“Are you gonna put me in my place, love?” Chan asked, and you hated the arrogant smirk taunting you just as much as your shameless act of groping his cock through the front of his pants.
“Yeah,” you grinned. “I can do that for you.”
It took less than a second for Chan to roll over top of you, grinning in a self-satisfied way as he slowly pulled your shorts and panties down your thighs.
You watched him with a contented groan as he threw them into the floor, parting your thighs to make room for him. Closing your eyes at the first swipe of his tongue against your slit, searching for a familiar mess of curls through a narrowed line. “I’ll make it all better, love,” Chan promised, and your fingers shot out to find purchase against his strong shoulders, arching your back at the promise of a night you couldn’t possibly forget.
#bang chan smut#bang chan fanfic#bang chan imagines#bang chan scenarios#stray kids smut#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#skz imagines#skz oneshots#skz fanfic#mostly competent
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In The Heat Of The Moment - Aaron Hotchner
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x reader
Requested: By @forgottenword
Prompts: #3 from the common trope-list.
Warnings/notes: Unprotected sex. Wrap it before you tap it, kids. I’m extremely bad at writing smut so I apologize in advance for the shitty quality😩 I want to stress that my smut requests are CLOSED, this was an only exception because I liked the concept, so please don’t send in smut requests because hey will be deleted. This turned out a lot longer than I planned but oh well. Please leave a comment and let me know what you think. Thank you <3 NOT PROOFREAD
Wordcount: 7175
Summary: When having a fever and being caught in the rain, you’re bound to be freezing and in need of heat. And what better way to get warmed up than by sharing a bed with your boss?
You and Aaron Hotchner had never gotten along as well as co-workers should in your line of work. You were great agents, great people, when you were separated. But when you were together… Well, let’s just say that it was never a pretty sight.
You had joined the BAU around the same time and despite only being beginners back then, you were both great at what you did. But putting you together on your first job was everything but a match made in heaven.
You were a bit younger than him and you were used to being criticized by men your entire life, so when working with Hotch turned out to be no different, you became competitive and determined to show your worth to him and your fellow agents.
You could easily just shoot your enemy if you ever felt threatened in the field, but when it came to Hotch, your co-worker, your only line of defense was your quick-witted sarcasm.
In Hotch’s eyes, you behaved like a child from the start and he wanted nothing more than to just have you transferred, but the longer you worked together, the more used to it he got.
He still didn’t like it though, not one bit, but it was bearable back when you’d had Gideon to step in and calmly settle your differences whenever those popped up. Which, let’s be honest, was often.
But now he was gone and Hotch had stepped up to take the leading position, and even though you hadn’t been interested in that position, yourself, you hated that he now had the higher ground and the perfect shot to make your life a living hell just like you had, knowingly, made his.
If you wanted to go to the crime scene, he sent you to question potential witnesses. If you wanted to question potential witnesses, he sent you to the crime scene. If you specifically asked to do something, he made you do the exact opposite and if you specifically asked not to do something, that’s exactly what he forced you to do. And now that he was your superior rather than your equal, you were in no place to argue, no matter how much you wanted to.
You wouldn’t go as far as to say you hated each other; you respected him and he respected you, but you just couldn’t stand each other and the way the two of you always seemed to criticize the other’s capability of getting the job done.
He always underestimated you and condescendingly shook his head at your every move, and you just couldn’t help but run your mouth about how he did everything wrong when you were with him.
It could be amusing to see you bicker, to say the least, but eventually, the team was starting to get tired of the way your disagreements and inability to work together was constantly threatening to ruin the case, so they were more than relieved when, finally, the two of you were beginning to settle down.
When Haley filed for a divorce, you were the only one on the team who didn’t change your entire persona. While the others walked on eggshells around him, always afraid to say the wrong thing and make him snap, you remained your usual big-mouthed, snarky self, never letting him catch a break.
Up until then, you had never been anything other than a major pain in his ass, but under these circumstances, the fact that you didn’t go out of your way to feel sorry for him provided a kind of security for him.
You approached him about it once after a case on which he had shown himself more agitated and reckless than usual, telling him that he could talk to you if he wanted to, but after that, you just left him alone to deal with everything the way he wanted to.
Knowing he had the support but also being given the choice to choose on his own rather than having the support forced upon him was just what he needed and in your own, dysfunctional way, you grew closer because of it.
He started to willingly take you along during cases while he sent the others to deal with other aspects, as opposed to the past where the last thing he wanted was to be stuck with just you, knowing you’d find some way to go against his wishes just to spite him.
He’d always known that you were a great person and an even greater agent and profiler, even though he would never admit it out loud, but it was only after his divorce that he really came to see you in a different light.
However, despite his newfound fondness of you, there were still rules to be followed; ones he, as a leader, could not look past if broken.
One of the most important rules were that you couldn’t get attached or emotionally involved in a case. Being able to remain objective was of the utmost importance in order to not risk jeopardizing the entire investigation and this specifically, you’d never had a problem with.
You felt for the families and victims of course, but you knew that in order to do your job, you had to close yourself off to the grief they were feeling. Struggling with this was more common for the others on the team, but you did alright.
But then there was the rule that emphasized the importance of staying at home or at least in the office if you ever happened to get sick, and the most important rule, at least for you, not to lie or go against your boss’s orders. And you had broken both of them.
It had started out with a light cough and a runny nose; nothing too alarming seeing as it could easily pass for allergies, which just so happened to be the excuse you used when confronted about it.
Eventually the cough disappeared and your nose dried up, leading you to believe that the excuse you had been telling everyone for three days straight could actually be the truth, but then came the fever, out of nowhere in the middle of the night.
You laid awake trembling and sweating through your sheets both at the same time, and yet, you pulled your ass out of bed the next morning and got to work, completely ignoring the fact that you were obviously not well.
And as was only natural, the light fever got worse and brought several other complications with it as you kept pushing yourself in the field. You became short of breath easier and your ears started hurting, bringing back the terrible memories from your childhood back when you’d get the worst ear infections on a frequent basis for years.
But you’d just been invited into a new case, one that took longer than they usually did and one that you just so happened to get attached to, against your better judgement. You kept getting sicker and you tried your hardest to hide it, because you just couldn’t leave your team in those desperate times.
You were also, as you always had been, too stubborn to admit the fact that you needed help and rest, and so you sucked it up and pretended that you were fine, something that seemed to go unnoticed as the others were just as caught up in the job and determined to get to the bottom of the case as you were.
And you did, get to the bottom of it, as you always did. You solved the case, identified and tracked down the unsub and went in for the arrest.
Hotch and Prentiss went around the back and you and Reid went in through the house while Morgan and Rossi stood by the police cars, waiting for Hotch’s orders to come in.
You and Reid were the ones to find the man first, catching him off-guard and holding him at gunpoint until Hotch and Prentiss appeared from the back and handcuffed him.
You were able to complete the arrest and save the hostage before anything could happen to her, and luckily, the state you were in hadn’t affected the case nor your ability to work.
But once everything was safe, you subconsciously let down the façade you had been putting on for the past few days and as you walked out of the house, a sudden wave of dizziness hit you and sent you falling to the ground before you had even reached the cars.
Morgan, having had his eyes on you when you walked out, was the first one to witness it and rushed to your side, alerting your fellow team members. By then, you were knocked out cold from the exhaustion and as the medics at the scene rushed up, they noted aloud that you had a very high fever and had to get to the hospital.
You were rushed there in the ambulance that had originally been for the hostage should she have needed to be treated, and as you laid unconscious, Hotch sat by your side, glaring at you despite the fact that you couldn’t even see it.
Luckily, your carelessness hadn’t come in the way of the case as you hadn’t hit rock bottom until it was all over, but in a worst case scenario it could’ve affected your ability to properly do your job which was exactly why the rules said you couldn’t work when sick.
But despite the fact that everything had worked out, you had gone against the rules by hiding your sickness and working despite it, which was the sole reason of your sudden collapse and also the reason that Hotch was now forced to drive all the way back to Quantico as the doctor hadn’t cleared you for flying with your ear infection, and it was safe to say that he was not happy about it.
“You put the entire team in danger today.” He spoke for the first time since you had sat down in the car, in which you had been seated for the past forty minutes.
Forty, painfully slow minutes of thick and tense silence, both of you just waiting in dread for the argument that was sure to come.
But even then, now that the silence had been broken, you didn’t feel any better.
“I know.” You replied simply from where you sat beside him in the passenger seat.
You stared out the window lazily, slumped in your seat and breathing slowly, each breath fogging up the glass and dimming the view of the darkening sky outside.
Your ears picked up on the sound of crunching leather, no doubt being caused by Hotch’s grip tightening on the steering wheel. “Is that all you have to say?” He asked bitterly. Annoyance was radiating off of him and the tone in his voice only made its existence more evident.
An unintentional sigh of exhaustion left your lips and for the first time, you dared to turn your head to look at him. “What do you want me to do?” You asked. “I made a mistake and I’m sorry.”
“Sorry doesn’t cut it.” He wasted no time in answering, not even bothering to look at you, and this time you could see with your own eyes how his grip on the wheel hardened, his knuckles turning white.
You turned your attention back to the window and let out another long breath through your nose, but Hotch was nowhere near finished.
“What if your fever had caused you to black out in the middle of the arrest? You could’ve been ambushed from behind, too weak to fight back, and died. Reid would’ve been on his own, without backup, and could’ve died.”
Once again you turned your head to look at him, your face wiped free of emotion as you stared into his side profile.
“It’s of the utmost importance that we’re always on top of our game. We can not afford to take chances like these. You can’t-“ He sighed, sparing you the briefest of glances. “You can’t lie to me, to us, about the state of your health. By doing so, not only are you endangering yourself, but you’re endangering us all. The team, and the hostages. I won’t be able to look past this, my hands will be tied of it comes down to an evaluation.”
He wanted you to feel guilty and you understood, because you knew that you had been stupid and reckless and that you had behaved inappropriately and done what you just couldn’t do in this line of work. But no matter how deep and thick the guilt settled in the pit of your stomach, you knew his threats of ‘not being able to look past it’ were empty.
After all, he had done the exact same thing on more than one occasion since the divorce; gotten so indulged in the case at hand that he had recklessly and inappropriately broken protocol, because of which he had taken a lot of heat lately.
But still, the string you were still holding on to, the string of getting to keep your job, was short and weak, and the only thing keeping you quiet, something Hotch was taking full advantage of.
He kept scolding you for at least five more minutes, but you weren’t listening to any of it, too distracted by the painful pressure in your ears and completely out of it, barely even able to hang on to reality in your disoriented and feverish state.
The heat in the car was cranked up to the max, and yet you were shivering in your seat, shrinking back into your thin sweater as far as you could in a desperate attempt to preserve your bodily heat.
But no matter how hot your skin was to the touch, you were freezing, and it wasn’t until the weather outside took a complete three-sixty turn, forcing Hotch to put his disapproving scolding on hold in order to concentrate on not driving you into a ditch in the blinding rain, that he took the time to take note of your state.
In any other case you would’ve been all too aware of his eyes on you, but right now, you could barely even stay awake.
The pain in your ears was for the most part gone for the moment, but the fever only seemed to have gotten worse, and it showed in more ways than one. And it was in the way you had barely said a word to him, which was a near never-occurring thing, that Hotch realized that you really weren’t well.
An unsure silence fell as a blanket over the car for a moment as his eyes kept flickering back and forth between the road and you, where you were barely able to keep your own eyes open.
“Are you alright?” He finally questioned and he waited for a long moment for you to answer, and when he got none, he cautiously moved his hand out to touch your knee. “(Y/N).”
Your eyes shot open and your head whipped around to face him at the sound of your name and the feeling of his hand on your leg. “Hm?” You asked in an absent manner, instantly regretting your hasty movements when your head started throbbing.
“Are you alright?” He repeated, eyebrows creasing in worry when you raised your hand to your forehead and closed your eyes.
You took a steady breath, trying to calm your spinning head, before carefully shaking it. “No.”
“Are you ears hurting?”
“My head.” You took another breath, squeezing your eyes shut at the painful jabbing at the side of your head, feeling them sting like they would when you’d spent hours upon hours crying.
Hotch watched from the side as you rubbed your forehead and temples, taking note of how hard you were squeezing your eyes shut and how badly you were shivering. Slowly but surely, he felt the anger he had previously been feeling melting off.
He said nothing else, giving your sullen face a last glance before turning his attention back to the road in front of him. But his hand didn’t move, remaining at your knee where his thumb rubbed soft, absentminded circles as an attempt to offer you some comfort.
For a second it made your heart flutter like never before, but soon enough, you’d forgotten all about it, only being able to focus on how incredibly shitty you were feeling. Not only physically, but mentally too, because Hotch had been right about everything he had said.
You were sweating like crazy, feeling trapped in the car where you couldn’t escape your thoughts and the guilt that was getting bigger by the minute, and you wanted nothing more than to get out and breathe some fresh air.
So when Hotch stopped at a gas station to fill up the tank and get some water and painkillers for your head, you did just that, not even being able to process the fact that the rain was still pouring down until it was too late.
You stood with your back leaned against the car, hugging yourself tightly and shivering even more than before as your clothes were now soaked, but the crisp air felt nice and was a blessing for your aching head.
Hotch came out of the gas station three minutes later and spotted you immediately, wasting no time in breaking into a run in your direction.
“What are you doing?! You’re already sick!” He yelled over the sound of rain harshly colliding into the exterior of the car.
You didn’t have the energy to fight back, simply continuing to rub your forehead. “I’m sorry, it was so stuffed in there, I needed to get out.” You mumbled silently, and he sighed, walking around you to open your car door.
“Get back in the car.” He ordered, and you did as told, allowing him to help you inside and waiting for him to close the door behind you before leaning against it.
He quickly got in in the driver’s seat and wasted no time in starting the car and cranking the heat up the little way further that was possible, throwing the bottle of water and packet of painkillers into the backseat.
“You’re shaking, we need to get you dry and warm.” He said as he fuzzed over you, silently urging you to take off your outer layer and helping you do so.
He drove out of the gas station once you were properly situated again, holding your hands in his in an attempt to warm them up.
You drove for a while longer and soon enough, Hotch took a right and parked the car. But you were half asleep and completely out of it, barely even able to process that he’d left you until the door you were leaning against opened, causing you to fall right into his chest and forcing you awake.
“Here, take this.” He wasted no time in draping you in a thick, scratchy blanket that you’d never seen before.
Nevertheless, you didn’t protest, getting out of the car and staying glued to his side as he walked you in the direction of the hotel you were now apparently parked in front of.
Once you reached the door to the room you guessed he’d fixed you for the night, he unlocked the door, ushered you inside and locked the door behind you.
Out of pure instinct, your hand moved to the light switch right next to the front door, only to discover that the power was out.
You were still dizzy, your skin burning hot but freezing to your core, but you were awake now, and all you wanted was a hot shower, so your second instinct was to head into the bathroom to test the water, and just your luck, the hot water was gone, as well.
Shivering, you turned back to face the entirety of the room, the only light in sight being the light of the moon streaming in through the windows and Hotch’s phone as he used it to find his way around.
“There’s no hot water.” You deadpanned, hugging yourself close and standing still in the middle of the room.
“The power is out and there’s a flood down the road, the woman at the counter said it could take a while for it to return so we’ll have to make do with what we’ve got in the meanwhile and get you out of your wet clothes.” Hotch wasted no time in replying as he busied himself with un-making one of the two beds.
He didn’t even spare you as much as a glance but you watched him for a moment longer, taking in his hurried movements as he ripped the blankets of the bed you presumed would be his, instead placing them on the bed with your name on it.
You knew he could feel your eyes on him, but when he didn’t turn around, you let out a breath through your nose and uncrossed your arms from over your chest, instead beginning to undress yourself.
And let me tell you, that’s not an easy task when you’re shivering like a chihuahua and have an a hundred and three degree fever and the current strength of an infant.
Your arms were heavy, almost too heavy to lift, and your fingers trembled when you began working on the buttons of your shirt. You tried your hardest to see what you were doing but the lack of light in the room made it hard, and the more you strained your eyes, the more intense your headache and dizziness got.
By now, Hotch had finished setting up your bed and turned around to see you struggling, taking a few small steps in your direction.
“Do you need help?” He asked, and you dropped your hands to your sides.
“Yeah.”
He walked up to you and wasted no time in getting to work on your buttons. You watched his face the entire time, even in your feverish daze being able to pick up on how hard he was trying to focus his eyes on his fingers in a respectful manner.
Once the last button came undone, you turned around and allowed him to pull the article of clothing off your body, the snug fabric releasing a creaking sound as it was pulled off your wet skin.
Hotch wordlessly walked over to the desk placed in the room and hung the shirt over the back of a chair, while you went to work on your pants.
Luckily, this piece of clothing only had one button and you managed to get it undone without too much trouble, sitting down on your bed and pulling them off – this part taking a bit more struggle seeing as they were stuck to your skin just like the shirt had been.
But you managed and wasted no time in crawling under the multitude of blankets that Hotch had neatly piled up on the bed, tucking yourself in as tightly as possible and pulling them up to your nose in an attempt to fill the inside of the cocoon with warm air.
It worked to an extent, your skin quickly regaining its previous heat and feeling so hot to the touch that one could’ve easily thought that you were on the verge of burning up.
But it did nothing to warm your core, and no matter how hard you tried keeping the shivers at bay by relaxing your body and keeping your breaths steady, it was to no use.
You laid there in silence for a good moment, becoming unaware of your surroundings once again, including the pair of eyes burning into the side of your face from across the room.
Hotch watched you closely while he followed his own advice and discarded his wet shirt, unbuckling his belt, hanging it on a chair and kicking off his shoes and socks.
Dressed now only in his damp slacks, he moved to grab the bottle of water and painkillers that he’d gotten from the gas station, and continued to the side of your bed, where he crouched down in front of you.
“Take this.” He instructed and you opened your eyes, pushing yourself up with all your might so that you could take the outstretched items from his hand.
You swallowed the pill with two gulps of water and fell right back into bed once he had taken the bottle back, pulling the blankets up to your nose again.
He stood back up to his full height and as a strong shiver went down your spine, the words tumbled out of your mouth before you could stop yourself.
“I need more heat, this isn’t enough. You’ll have to lay with me.”
Hotch’s face pulled into one of mild surprise at the sound of your unexpected words, and he instantly started protesting. “I don’t think-“
But you interrupted, staring up at him with those angry eyes that he so often found himself at the receiving end of. “I’m freezing my ass off and you’re cold, too. I’m not about to let you sleep without blankets. It’s just until the power and hot water comes back.”
He stared back at you, face ever so stoic. “Fine.” He gave in, and only then did you soften your glare.
You closed your eyes as he began removing his pants, slowly scooting back on the bed to make room for him, and you couldn’t help but let out a breath of relief when he lifted the covers and slid in next to you.
Your skin was hot with fever but somehow, his was even hotter, burning you to the touch.
You were still freezing, but as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close, you instantly found it easier to relax, your shivering toning down a great deal.
Out of pure instinct, you snuggled further into his chest and you could feel on the stiffness of his body that he was uncomfortable and unsure of how to react in the situation you’d so inconveniently found yourself in.
Opening your eyes as far as your heavy eyelids would let you, you found him to be staring up into the roof. But the second he felt your heavy gaze on him, he turned his head to the side to meet your eyes.
Heat flushed through your entire body and you had been aroused enough times to recognize the feeling.
You knew all of this had started off innocent, a person simply trying to warm up another person as an act of kindness and basic human decency, and you never would’ve had these impure thoughts about him in any other situation, but your body was reacting on its own to the feeling of his skin against yours, and so was his.
Your faces were close to each other, mere inches apart, and before you were able to stop yourself, you leaned in closer and brushed your lips against his.
He retaliated immediately, pulling back and looking down at you with an unreadable expression written all over his face.
He told himself that the fever was making you confused and disoriented, but when you moved back in for a second attempt, this time with a lot more clarity in your eyes and confidence in your movements, he didn’t pull back.
You remained still for the entirety of the kiss, your lips just pressed against each other’s with little to no extended movements. When you came apart again, your breaths were heavy but the sound of your heart beating loudly in your ears was the only thing you could hear.
You stared into each other’s eyes and your eyes momentarily fluttered shut when he brought his hand up and grazed your lower lip with his thumb.
And then his lips were on yours again, and this time you just kept going.
His hands cradled your face and you laid down flat on your back, wrapping your arms around his neck and opening your legs to allow him to move on top of you. You pulled him impossibly close, a surge of sudden energy bursting through your entire body.
He was a gentleman at heart but he didn’t bother asking you if you were sure, knowing better than anyone that you were more than capable of telling him if you weren’t. You were both adults, you knew exactly what you were doing.
You’d had your fair share of rendezvouses throughout your life, but none had left you feeling like this.
Passion, desperation, fervor, urgency, impatience, hunger, eagerness, and every single other synonym that could be used to describe the lustful attraction between two people were currently battling in your body.
But more present than any other feeling was the anger; anger directed at you, fueled by the way you had put yourself and your entire team at risk by lying about the state of your health, and anger directed at him, fueled by the way he had always underestimated you and doubted your abilities.
You were both furious in all ways possible and neither of you had any plans on stopping, his hands already making their way down your body and heading straight for the direction of the place where you needed him the most.
His hands were warm but yours were cold, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake as they traveled his arms, chest, shoulders and neck.
One of your hands stayed at his neck, tracing light touches over his throat and jaw, while the other one moved down the length of your own body to meet with his where it was hovering above the line of your underwear.
You grabbed a hold of it and pushed his palm flat against the bottom of your stomach, urging him to continue, and he didn’t waste a second, dipping his hand inside the waistband of the thin fabric that was still wet from the rain and resting uncomfortably against your skin.
Breath getting caught in your throat and heart palpitating in your chest, you pushed your head back into the pillow, your eyes falling shut at the pleasurable feeling of his fingers finding your core, your lips coming apart in the process.
Instead, his face bent down and nuzzled the crook of your neck, lips leaving slow kisses behind as he adjusted his hand.
It obviously wasn’t going as smoothly as he’d like though, the wet fabric getting caught on his skin and causing a frustrated sound to escape his throat.
“These need to go.” He mumbled into the skin of your shoulder and you eagerly nodded, completely ignoring the headache that was still going strong.
You raised your hips to allow him access, and he wasted no time in pushing the underwear off your legs, leaving you to shake them off your feet.
They got lost somewhere underneath the numerous blankets but you couldn’t care less, your hands hurrying down to the waistband of his boxers.
He drew in a breath at the feeling of your icy cold fingers, but made no move to stop you, helping you in ridding himself of the only remaining clothing he had on and then moving on to unclasp your bra, carelessly throwing it onto the floor and latching his lips back onto yours.
His hand returned to your heat and just like he had done mere seconds before, you sucked in a sharp breath as his fingers dipped in, running a line up your folds before pushing their way inside.
He hooked his finger down into your entrance to gather some of your wetness, bringing it up all the way along your slit and stopping only when he reached the sensitive bundle of nerves that was just throbbing with need.
That’s when the first moan of many to come left your lips, being muffled into the kiss and your stomach exploding with butterflies.
But just like with any other aspect of your life, you were impatient, so when he pushed a finger inside of you, you broke free of the kiss and shook your head, reaching your hand down to stop him by his wrist.
“No, you’re going too slow.” You panted, pulling his hand away and looking into his darkened eyes. “I need you, now.”
Your voice thinned into a whisper toward the end and you brought your hands back up to his face.
He remained still for a few seconds, just looking at you with his usual stoic expression and pursed lips, but the soon dipped down to meet your face again, brushing his lips against yours so lightly you could barely feel it, before pressing down with more force.
What started off as a close-mothed kiss quickly turned into an open-mouthed one, and you moved down on the mattress, raising your legs to wrap them around his waist as he positioned himself at your entrance.
He wasn’t fully erected yet, as was to be expected seeing as you had barely touched him and things had moved so quickly, but the second he was fully sheathed inside of you, that changed in an instant.
The feeling of being filled so perfectly caused your face to screw up in pleasure and he couldn’t help but let a small groan slip past his lips, really showing how long it had been since he last partook in sexual activities.
But he wasn’t the only one who had gone untouched for a long period of time. When you worked a job as stressful and time-consuming as yours, it was hard to find enough spare time to get out and meet any potential lovers, so it was safe to say that it had been just as long for you as it had for him and it didn’t take long for you to let out a moan to match his own.
He wasted no time in starting to move, encouraged to do so by the way your legs tightened around his hips to pull him in deeper.
You clung to him with all your might as he slowly but surely picked up his pace and found a good rhythm, squeezing your eyes shut and being reminded of the fever you still had when feeling the brims of your eyes sting.
Your hands moved to grasp at the back of his head and you pressed your lips against his, baiting a groan from his throat when tightening your grip on the strands of raven hair you held between your fingers.
His movements were confident and his lips moved skillfully from yours to your jaw, down to your neck before settling in the crook of your neck.
One of his hands moved from the mattress to hold on to the headboard of the bed and his toned arm flexing and unflexing right over your face was without a doubt the most attractive sight you’d ever seen.
“Hotch...” You moaned out between thrusts, and he grumbled in return.
“Aaron.” He corrected you darkly, and you drew in a gasp of air at the sound.
“Aaron-” You began repeating, but was quickly cut off by your own moan and after that, no more words were spoken.
The heavy breaths he released in the crook between your neck and shoulder only added to the already existing dampness on your skin, courtesy of the fever that you had almost forgotten was still there, and it was only now that the heat that had previously been restricted to the outer layer of your skin caught up with the rest of your body and made its way into your core.
The only sounds that could be heard was the heavy rain smattering on the metal ceiling outside your room, mixing in with the pants and low moans and groans escaping your lips, the creaking of the headboard that Hotch was holding on to for dear life, and the slapping of skin on skin.
He didn’t slow down once and not as much as a word was spoken, every emotion and feeling instead being voiced in sounds of pleasure and the occasional kiss when he brought his head up from your neck for air.
You got completely lost in the pleasure and you had no idea how long you went on for, but soon enough, you were beginning to get sore, the pleasure starting to switch into a mild discomfort.
But as if right on cue, the guttural groans muffling into your damp skin became more frequent, and before you knew it, Hotch’s entire body tensed up as he reached his climax and released inside of you.
But you weren’t quite there yet, never having been able to orgasm just by penetration.
You didn’t know how he was able to do both at the same time, but as he rode out his high, Hotch brought his hand down from the headboard and in between your bodies at the same time, heading right for the throbbing bundle of nerves where he wasted no time in getting to work.
That was the final touch you needed for your stomach to begin to turn. The combination of the way he was hitting the perfect spot over and over again and his thumb showing no mercy was so intense that you reached your high in no time.
You pressed your face into his neck just like he was doing yours, your fingers tugging on his hair so harshly that you probably crossed the line between pleasurable and painful. But he didn’t make note on it, picking up his pace as a string of curses left your lips, blending with your moans and mixing with his name, something he was clearly liking the sound of.
And just as you toppled of the edge, bright flashes flashing on the inside of your eyelids as your entire stomach pulled into a tight knot, the lights in the ceiling of the room flashed as well, the radiator over by the window buzzing to life as the power returned.
Talk about timing.
He kept on pumping into you with sloppy, lazy thrusts as you rode out your high and as soon as he felt you relax around him again, his entire body slumped against yours in a moment of exhaustion.
You laid limp, chest rising and falling in quick pants as you caught your breath. His hand moved up to hold himself upright by the head of the bed and your hands remained at the back of his neck, fingers gently pulling through his hair that was now damp with sweat.
After a moment of silence, he moved off of you, allowing you to properly breathe.
“How’s your head?” He asked.
His voice was strained and it was clear that now that the arousal was gone and everything was over and done with, neither of you had any idea of how to act.
Pulling one of the blankets up to your shoulders and holding it in place over you previously exposed chest, you cleared your throat.
“All good.” You replied breathlessly and just then, reality came crashing back down, an involuntary shiver going down your spine and rocking your entire body as it became aware of the chilliness of the air around you.
He caught on to this at once and turned his head to look at you with a deadpanned expression. “You’re still shivering, you should go take a warm shower before you go to sleep.”
His words brought a small snort from your lips. “I’m not shivering, I’m trembling. There’s a difference.” You answered, raising an eyebrow. “But I won’t say no to a shower.” You sighed, and as you wasted no time in beginning to get out of the bed, Hotch averted his eyes to the roof to give you some privacy.
The cold air hit you like a train when you removed the blankets from your body, your shivers becoming worse now with the layer of drying sweat on your skin.
It wasn’t until you stood up that the fever came crashing down on you with full force again, a spell of hot dizziness taking over you. You had to hold on to the wall beside the bed to regain your composure and once you did, you began walking, only then realizing how sore you really were.
As quickly as your quivering legs would take you, you walked into the bathroom and flicked on the light in the ceiling before heading straight for the shower.
As you turned on the faucet this time, you were pleased to discovered that the hot water had returned along with the power, and you closed your eyes in satisfaction even when the water had yet to touch any other part of your body than your fingers.
You remained standing there for a moment, holding yourself upright by the sink while waiting for the water to reach the perfect temperature.
You then brought your hand back to yourself and turned back around as you let the water run behind you.
Hotch was still in your bed, now having moved into a sitting position and absentmindedly fiddling with the watch on his wrist, seeming to be deep in thought.
And you were a profiler. You could tell with no struggle at all what was bothering him; guilt, most likely directed toward Haley as he had just been with another woman for the first time since the divorce.
The fact made you feel all kinds of feelings, and you slowly walked back to the doorway, on which you leaned as you continued watching him from a distance.
“I’m still really cold, you know.” You commented lamely, hoping that he’d take the hint on what you were trying to say.
His head slowly turned in your direction, his eyes tired and lips pulled into a straight line. His eyes wandered your still naked form for the briefest of second, but he quickly caught himself and averted them to yours.
“I thought you said you weren’t cold anymore.” He answered in a monotone voice, and you raised your eyebrows in return.
“Did I? I don’t think I did.” You played, absentmindedly tapping your fingers against the wooden doorframe.
He stared at you for a second, not seeming to care about you in the slightest anymore. But tthe way his lips then pulled into a small smile when looking at you showed you that he did, in fact, catch on to your intent.
And when he wordlessly got out of bed and started walking in your direction, leading you into the shower with a featherlight touch to the small of your back, you knew for a fact that the moment of passion you had just shared had been much more than just an act executed in the heat of the moment.
But if you thought that you were off the hook regarding your irresponsible behavior during the case just because you now happened to have your boss wrapped around your finger, you had another thing coming.
Tagged: @must-be-a-weasley-92 @zizzlekwum @cozytruecrimeaddict @lovelynervouskingdom @rousethemouse
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#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#hotch x reader#hotch#hotch imagine#hotchner#hotchner imagine#hotchner x reader#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds imagine#spencer reid#emily prentiss#derek morgan
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Looking back
@cruelfeline wanted a snippet between Hordak and Glimmer where they contemplated on how much of a fuckup either of them is.
I took it as a prompt and I hope this little oneshot scratches that itch.
It was always better to go to a banquet than to host it, Glimmer thought to herself while making her way down the long hallway of the reclusive palace wing. If she felt at odds or tired or just not in the mood, all she had to do was signal Bow and he’d take her home. But as a host, she WAS home, there was nowhere else to go to. Besides, since she was the esteemed host, she couldn’t leave early. It would be in poor taste.
This year, the anniversary of the end of the war was hosted in Bright Moon and she had to find a secluded place in her own home to take a breather from all the commotion before she had to return to the party and smile and nod and… try not to feel like such an imposter.
She finally found her favorite overlook, the one where she came to sulk whenever her mother gave her a stern -and justified- talking to, the best view and the music of the party down in the main hall was muted. No sooner did she lay her hands upon the balustrade that she spotted movement to the periphery of her vision. It was another person she really didn’t want to interact with due to the sheer awkwardness: Hordak. He was sitting by himself in contemplation, looking on into the distance in the last light of the day.
She and he stood meters apart on the balcony in silence for a while. He seemed to look at peace while staring off into the sunset. She tried to do the same. Her maelstrom of thoughts made it difficult.
During the war, she had never met him face to face, all she knew was what other people said of him – both her own and other hordesmen that were captured and interrogated.
Their first meeting in the flesh had been memorable… for very terrible, nightmare inducing reasons. Even now, she couldn’t look at Hordak without seeing Prime discard his errant tool then threaten to destroy her world in a dulcet voice as if it were the most trite of things. It probably had been to that monster…
Hordak hadn’t been what she – an everyone else thought he was. What made it even more jarring, and unexpected, had been his eagerness to repent and atone following the war.
Glimmer had decreed that Prime’s little brothers were not at fault for what they had been made to do for their creator, all of them, Hordak included. She couldn’t in good conscience persecute any of them whilst knowing, intimately – unlike the other monarchs- where they came from and what had been done to them.
Hordak however, decided to be difficult, because of course he did.
He insisted that even had his actions been in the hopes of serving Prime, they had been his actions, his mistakes. He owned them, and he owed Etheria. He had decided- by himself - to rebuild the things he had a hand in destroying not out of a desperate bid for forgiveness but because it was what he had been convinced that it was the right, and the just thing to do.
It made it very awkward for her to interact with him… whenever she invited Entrapta to these events, he was always her plus one. Entrapta was a sore spot for Glimmer. She had decided that the Dryll princess would be the first one to be invited whenever Glimmer hosted any event. It was the least she owed her.
She had learned that Entrapta endangered herself to save her back when she had been abducted on Prime’s ship… a few weeks before that, Glimmer had argued with Adora and Bow to leave her on Beast Island for the time being. It was a shame that stung deeply. Entrapta had been a far better friend to her than she had been to Entrapta. To make matters worse, Entrapta seemed either oblivious or not to hold it against her. It made Glimmer’s guilt even worse. At times, she wished Entrapta HAD been angry, she wished the other princess would give her a piece of her mind, at least then, she’d be able to make it up to her.
Huh!
No wonder Hordak “punished” himself with reparations and reconstructions…She couldn't stop a heavy sigh from escaping her. It wasn't an invitation to talk but he seemed to take it as one since the noise startled him out of his contemplation and he slowly turned towards her.
“Good evening, your grace.” It was always a bit comical when one of Prime’s clones bowed to her, they would have to bend over comically low to match her height. Hordak didn’t. He merely bowed his head smoothly and lowered his ears to convey submission.
“Uh, hey.” How dignified of her. She wished she had half as much grace as her mother had. “Uuuh,-“ he looked at her with that blank face that had been conditioned into him. ‘Ugh, say something Glimmer, this doesn’t have to be this awkward. Make an effort, for Entrapta’s sake at least!’. “- lovely sunset, right?”
He blinked slowly then turned back to the vista. “Indeed.”
‘C’mon! Give me SOMETHING to work with here!’ She thought to herself. “What do you think of the party?” That had been a host thing to ask, it was appropriate and neutral right?
It wasn’t... The answer came in that calm, low, dignified and slightly husky voice of his, a voice that had cracked from screaming and had never recovered. His posture betrayed his unease. Hordak further stiffened at the question.
“It is,-“ he paused considering his words carefully “quite sumptuous, your grace.” He bowed again. It was clearly at least as uncomfortable for him as it was for her.
This wasn’t helping… ‘Good job Glimmer!’ If it hadn’t been weird and both of them had enjoyed the companionable silence before, now she had made things awkward.
While considering what to say next, he saved her the effort by saying. “Your guests are enjoying themselves.” Was that a compliment? Was he trying to compliment her? She knew from former interactions with him that he had a very stiff and formal way of talking, very unlike his progenitor. Words fit poorly in his mouth. It was so curious how, despite having the same voice and the same face, almost… they sounded worlds apart. He held himself differently too, Prime had filled every space he was in, he owned every room he walked into. Hordak on the other hand seemed perpetually on eggshells. Was that why he was here by himself?
“You are my guest too.” She said to him, trying to sound warm and welcoming but it came out a bit defensive.
The unasked question hung between them in the dying light of the day.
He saved her from asking it once more. “My presence… makes some of your other guests uneasy, your grace. I did not wish to impose.”
“Impose? Nonsense!” She waved it off with a chuckle. “You and Entrapta are welcome here, I’ve expressly invited the both of you myself. There is no way you could ‘impose’ in any way!” Then it hit her… “Did anyone tell either of you that you were imposing? If they did, tell me who it was and I’ll have a chat with them.”
He huffed out a chuckle then turned towards her once more. A small, tentative smile made its way on his face. “No such thing your grace, the initiative was all mine.” The shared gaze was broken as he looked at his feet then back into the distance. “ I wished to prevent it from becoming an issue. Many of your kinsmen are weary of me, and for good reason. My actions on your world did not endear me to most of your kind.” It seems that guilt had brought them both on this overlook.
“I should name this ‘the shitty overlook!’ Hah!” She laughed. “Because everyone comes on this balcony to feel shitty.” He looked at her, one browridge raised in inquiry. “You’re here because of the whole conquest thing and I’m here because I’ a terrible friend.”
Glimmer continued. “We both did regrettable things during the war.” She too looked on into the distance, the line of bleeding orange light got thinner and thinner as night overtook it, a thin line of fiery hues reflected off the surface of the turbulent lake. Silence hung between them for a few minutes.
“You did what you thought was necessary, your grace.” Despite the curt tone, it was a reassurance. It was uncanny for Hordak of all people to be the one trying to comfort her.
“We both did. It still doesn’t make it feel right.” Both of their closets had skeletons cramped in them.
“It may not but, at the time, you saw no other way to do your duty.” He sighed deeply. “Hindsight is indeed, not a charitable beast your majesty, but it is unfair.” He clicked his claws on the balustrade. The motion was somewhat distracting. ” You know things now that you couldn’t have possibly known back then. Within the constraints of the time and the data available, you did the best that you could, the best that could be expected. You were a formidable opponent.” As sound as his logic was, it did little to assuage the anger she aimed at herself.
“And I had my friends take the fall for me because I thought it was necessary.” She sighed and hugged herself. “I was wrong, even back then but I didn’t want to admit it, I thought the ends justify the means. They don’t. They never do.”
“It’s easy to overthink the choices made when one is aware that there were other options, other paths that could have been taken.” He sounded, small and sad, his own demons haunting him.” The reality of it is that, in the moment, you may not have been aware of other possibilities and time had not been on your side. You decided to move forward down the only path you saw before you. The alternative would have been admitting defeat. Had you done so, you wouldn’t be here to second guess yourself. It was, in general, the right thing to do even if you are left with the consequences of your perceived momentary oversights. You have the privilege now, to make up for your mistakes – a privilege you wouldn’t have had should you have not done the things you did. “
“Thank you. I needed to hear that.” She hadn’t known she needed it nor would she had ever asked for it and that’s exactly why the point had hit home. “She was right, you’re a good listener.”
He chuckled again, an animate chuckle that rippled through him as he shook his head and turned back to look at the lake. She made her way closer and took in the familiar view. Neither of them said anything after that.
They watched the stars appear on the night sky, reflecting off the surface of the lake, somewhat distorted. The ripples of the lake made their twinkling even brighter. The night was peaceful.
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