#i am still alive hello 👋

[topazzey]

Interesting how prior to Elongated Muskrat's takeover of Twitter I had no strikes, suspensions, or other adverse actions against my account, and since he sunk $44bn on the thing I've had one temporary suspension and am now totally banned from the platform for no good reason. And by interesting, I mean pathetic.

For someone who crows about 'free speech' so much, Mr. Apartheid Baby sure likes to deplatform others for exercising that right if we say anything that even slightly offends right-wing snowflakes. If he's trying to destroy the platform, it's working.

#i am still alive hello 👋 #just been off of most social media for a while #will likely become more active here again as twatter circles the drain and becomes a fascist cesspool #i dont even remember the tags i used to use for shit like this lmao #pls be patient with me as i shake off the rust #i wasnt even that active on twitter... just retweeting nps stuff and following left-wing political accounts

[fatuismooches]

Hello

I just saw your post with the fragile SO and honestly I loved it sooo much ❤️

Now I wanted to request kinda of a follow up. Like what if before you died you wrote them a letter, saying how much you love them and how they made your last days on earth so memorable and stuff like that. And they found it, like maybe a month or so after your death. How would they all react? (I'm specially curious of Capitano because you said you thought he would think that he killed you 😭)

I really love your writing and I plan to make more request in the future 👋

-🦎

♡𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐅𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐥𝐞/𝐖𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐃𝐢𝐞𝐝 ♡

synopsis: The Harbingers are made of steel, unflinching in any possible situation. But it seems that even such strong beings falter in the face of their lover's death, especially after they find a letter you left behind. Can be read as a part 2 to this.

includes: all harbingers (platonic pulcinella) w/ gn! reader

notes: Hop on the angst train, everyone. This is the first completely angsty thing I've written, and probably one of my favorites + longest pieces. I hope you enjoy this sadness, anon...!

Pierro:

Pierro carried on. He went about his day, filing paperwork, assigning duties to new recruits. What could he do? There was no time to mourn. The entire Fatui depended on his guidance and orders. He couldn’t just drop everything to fully devote himself to grieving you. But everyone knew - in any spare moment he had, he was thinking about you. Thinking about how he used to be able to go home to you waiting for him. Thinking about the walks he took with you that were heartwarming despite the body-chilling temperature. Thinking about when you were alive.

It was another day when one of your maids came to him with a piece of paper. Of course, she was terrified at being in the presence of the Harbinger, but she presented a folded piece of paper to him, stating that she had found it while cleaning your room. Pierro hadn’t been in there for a while. He was consciously trying his best to avoid it, choosing to pick up work instead. He nodded and the maid quickly scurried out of the room. It was most likely a final memento from you. He should honor that, he thought as he took off his mask.

Dear Pierro,

Hello there, my love. I hope your day wasn’t too tiring. I know how you’re always swamped with your Fatui business and such. You’re the head Harbinger, you know! You should definitely abuse your power to get some more days off. You didn’t hear that from me though, not like I wanna keep you to myself or anything. Totally not because I’m dying to spend some more time with you before I quite literally die. 

You know, sometimes I wish I was a Fatui soldier just so that I could admire you from afar some more. Those recruits are damn lucky, getting to see you more than I do. I don’t mean to complain though. I’m still tremendously grateful for everything you’ve done for me. I’ve had the pleasure of enjoying the best moments of my life with you. Yeah, even when I made jokes you still had that stoic look on your face but it was still hilarious. I loved when you would wrap me in your coat and tell me stories about Khaenri’ah. Even when you weren’t here, I loved when these random recruits would be scurrying to my room every so often to deliver your handwritten notes. 

Truly, there’s no life I’d rather live than this one… minus the illness part though. I am sorry to make you shoulder another death, my dear, but I love you greatly. I will always be with you.

Quietly, Pierro put the paper down and rubbed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. Ever since the fall of his nation, his heart had long gone numb. He had tried to ignore the prickling of his heart after your death, but your letter was really rubbing it on. When was the last time mere words could stir up such emotion in him? He didn’t know. But he promised you, this would not be your final resting place. Pierro knew, after fulfilling the Tsaritsa’s promise, he would see you again.

Capitano:

Capitano wasn’t very photogenic. After all, all you saw was a helmet shrouding his face in darkness along with his pitch-black armor and clothes. But you had insisted on taking a variety of pictures with him, claiming that it kept you happy. It wasn’t until later on when he stumbled across a scrapbook, with pages covered in photos of the two of you together, that he understood why. Since then, he let you do as you please. The doctors said it was good for you to keep occupied by doing things you liked. And well, it was rather cute, with all the decorations and fancy tape you added. Capitano often found himself looking at it to see what you added when you weren’t around.

But ever since your death, he hadn’t looked at it since. If he did, he didn’t think he’d be able to control the emotions boiling up inside of him. If he looked at your smiling face again, the pain and regret would be too much to bear. But as the days passed by and he continued to think about you, he couldn’t help but flip open the scrapbook, revisiting the memories he made with you so long ago. He flipped until he found a envelope in the middle, causing him to perk up. It had been sealed perfectly, even stamped with one of his seals. Now, Capitano didn’t want to invade your privacy, but what was inside called to him too much, and he very carefully unsealed it with a knife. Inside was a piece of parchment, similar to the ones he used to send you letters.

My knight,

I’m writing this after you just left for an expedition. You’ve just fed me breakfast (a/d fa//ed, but it’s f/ne b/ca/se it w/s c/te.) (The ending part of the sentence has been erased, but it’s still a bit readable.) We took an early bath together, and you helped me choose a nice outfit for today. You dutifully assisted me with my medicine and tucked me back into bed for some rest. Lastly, you’ve just tenderly kissed me with all the love in the world, my favorite part of course.

It’s too bad that I won’t be able to receive any more of your kisses soon. I think the sickness is really catching up to me, haha. (There are some doodles of the two of you randomly drawn in the middle of the paper, with lots of hearts and stars and rainbows. Maybe you stopped because you didn’t know how to continue.) To be honest, I’ve asked the doctors not to tell you, and somehow, they’ve listened to me. I just don’t want you to worry about me. Somehow, for someone as menacingly looking as you, you worry a lot more than I thought (no offense, though.)

I don’t want you to blame yourself for anything, my love. You genuinely made my life so, so much better. Even towards the end, I can only feel happiness that I was able to share some of my life with someone so incredible. You aren’t a monster. You’re the man I love dearly, the one who many people look up to all the time. You did everything and more, which really warms my heart.

I’m saying this because I know how you are and I need to knock some sense into you before you start getting any crazy ideas. Please don’t beat yourself up. If I could choose my destiny, I’d rather choose to be sick and be with you rather than being healthy. I’d choose you again and again, over and over, my dear. I love you, truly.

Carefully folding the letter, he tucked it into the envelope again and resealed it. He snugly placed it back into the scrapbook and closed it, placing it back into the drawer where he usually kept it. Capitano was used to the grief and destruction that war brought. But he wasn’t used to it when love brought these feelings upon him. His heart still hurt - terribly so - but… your letter seems to have brought him some peace. You would forever be in his heart.

Columbina:

It had been a while since your death. By now, everyone had become accustomed to hearing her songs every day. It was a constant reminder of your passing. Oftentimes,  Columbina had begun to stay in your room longer than her own. You were gone, but something about your space soothed her soul a bit from all the grief she was going through. And she also liked to go through your stuff and remember different things about you.

There was a box that contained a compilation of the many songs and poems she gifted you, along with some that you created yourself with her help. Sometimes, she liked to go through the box and think about you, but she never had the time to inspect every piece. Until now, when she noticed that there was an unfamiliar piece of paper that she didn’t recognize. Columbina picked it up and began to read.

My lovely melody,

Lately, I’ve begun to sing more. I think you’ve inspired me. I hope you don’t mind me stealing that one song you like to hum the most. The only problem is that I don’t have enough stamina to sing for that long, and I think my voice is kind of off-key. But I promise I’m working on it! I’m not going to tell you yet because I want to surprise you with something nice, as a thank you for taking care of me for so long.

Actually, there’s another problem, and it’s that… (it seems that you wrote a lot of words here and then scratched them out; perhaps you were unsure how to word it) Well, I guess I don’t really know if I’ll live long enough to perform for you. It’s been kind of tough lately. But I’m going to persevere for you. Your poems have been helping a lot. We should make a book of them one day. And um, in the case that I don’t make it, I would like you to know how happy you made me.

I always got so giddy when I heard you humming down the hallway. Nothing felt better than when you would croon to me and massage my scalp and play with my hair. You are so comforting and sweet, and just - lots of things that would be too much to write. I always feel eternally fortunate that I was able to have a lover as amazing as you. You really did change my life. I love you very much, Columbina. Please don’t forget me.

Columbina’s usual smile had turned into a downward curve. Oh, how she wished she could hear you sing. Your usual voice and laugh had already been angelic to her, she knew your songs would be beautiful too. But you were no longer here. She would have really loved to hear your song. You would have been the best duet partner. But perhaps, you could hear her songs from the other world as she laid on your coffin once again.

Dottore:

Dottore hadn’t entered your room since your death. He was far too busy with his research and experimentation with resurrection. Mourn you? No, no, you weren’t going to be dead for long, after he finds the answer. You would be back in his arms soon enough. Both of you would be fine. That was, until no matter how hard he researched, he always seemed to hit a dead end. It was frustrating. He couldn’t believe it, but he was at the point where he willingly needed a couple of minutes to rest. Dottore headed to his room, but as he placed his hand on the doorknob, something stopped him and he looked over to the room next to his, yours. He silently walked over and opened your room, having not been in it for a while. The only reason you didn’t share a room was that his was very… bland, boring, not very comfortable, and not spacious enough for the medical equipment.

It was the same as he had left it, not bothering to change anything. You liked to decorate it, and he let you. Framed photos of the two of you were on the dresser, lights hung up around the room. It seemed to make you happy. But there was something he had not noticed before - a slip of paper sticking out from under the pillow. Dottore walked over and took off his mask - something he unconsciously tended to do when it was just the two of you - and opened the folded paper.

To Zandik,

I remember when you first took interest in me, looking at me up and down with your mask on, a wide smirk on your face. I knew my parents said they hired someone intelligent to cure me, but I sure didn’t expect it to be the second Harbinger. I think you already know this, but when I saw you, I was kinda scared for my life. And I was for a while, especially when you made me drink the most hellish concoctions and injected strange things into me. But long story short, I still fell in love with you somehow. Even though you were probably trying so hard just because you wanted to solve the mystery of my illness, I couldn’t help but think you were quite handsome when you focused on something so intensely. Your pointy teeth were the cutest. (The previous sentence has been erased but Dottore could still make it out. You were an idiot, he thinks.)

I don’t mean to insult your intelligence or skill… but I don’t think I’m going to make it, Dottore. I know you’ve been trying really, really hard (I was there the whole time, after all) to help cure me, but I think you know better than me about my condition. So yeah. I guess this is my goodbye… my parting letter.

I know you don’t care about anyone or anything really, but I hope you accept it when I say I genuinely enjoyed our time together. Yea, you were hella terrifying and a lot of scary stories drifted about you, but there was a lot of maniacal laughter and you rambling on about things I had no clue about, but I would always happily listen to you, Zandik. I would write more, but I don’t think you’re one for sappy words and stuff like that. So I’ll leave end it here. I love you very much.

His mouth was a straight thin line at the end of your letter. Dottore put his mask back on and tucked your letter into his coat. For once, he couldn’t blame someone for insulting his intelligence. He did fail, after all. But Dottore was no stranger to failure. Experimentation was a series of trials and errors, failures and successes. He swore to himself that you would not be a failure. Perhaps his journey to Sumeru, the land of wisdom, would grant him some more insight for your resurrection.

Pulcinella:

It was just after your funeral. Surprisingly, all the Harbingers had gathered too. It seemed like they had grown somewhat fond of you after Pulcinella introduced you to them, at least enough to attend your funeral. Pulcinella was grateful. He had spoken a few words in memory of you. He couldn’t keep everyone for long. They had other matters to attend to. But in his heart, he had a lot of dear words for you. 

Pulcinella sat down at his desk, deciding to do some paperwork to distract his mind. He pulled out the drawer to retrieve some items but he noticed a piece of paper stuffed to the back of it. He certainly had not put that there. He reached for it and opened it to read the contents.

Hey Papanella,

Do you like that nickname I came up with? I haven’t said it to you yet because I’m not sure how you’ll react. But I think it’s pretty cute. I haven’t said this out loud yet either but… um, I guess you’re like my dad to me. My own parents never cared much for me after my illness proved to be too much work, but you always treated me so kindly. So yeah. Thanks for being a father figure to me. Archons, this is kind of embarrassing.

I’m admitting this because I don’t know how much longer I have. I know you’re always encouraging me to keep living on, and I really do appreciate it. I’m sincerely trying my best, but I think my sickness has been getting worse. Ah, and thanks for introducing me to the Harbingers. They’re pretty scary but they’re kind of cool when you get to know them. Some of them are cute too. Please don’t tell them I said that. But really, for the longest time, I thought my life would amount to nothing, and that no one would remember me. But you proved me wrong. I truly enjoyed spending the last of my days doing old people stuff with you (just kidding of course!)

I’m going to ask you to tell me lots of more stories when I see you again. They really make my day. I like the ones about you in your youth the best. They’re the funniest. Anyway, I love you, gramps. Don’t miss me too much.

Pulcinella was old. He had seen things be built and broken down, people come and go. But he always hated it the most when he had to see youngsters go before he did. Especially innocent ones who had done nothing wrong. He just prayed, that whichever world you were in now, treated you better than this one did.

Scaramouche:

Ever since your death, the soldiers had been on the receiving end of Scaramouche’s insults even more. No longer were you here to hastily save them from his berating, much to their dismay.  They actually appreciated you for stopping Scaramouche from giving them another verbal (and sometimes even physical) beating. But now if he wasn’t yelling at someone, he was deathly silent, which was why even scarier than his words. Everyone knew they were forbidden from speaking about you in his presence.

When Scaramouche had to visit Inazuma for whatever reason, he always found himself walking towards your house. Once he had came across the Tenryou Commission moving your items out of your house, due to no one living there anymore and the want for someone else to buy it. Needless to say, he swiftly dealt with them and sent them on their way with rage. They had tried a few more times and he did not hold back, until later they stopped coming, apparently after the head shrine maiden gave an order on the behalf of the Shogun to leave the residence alone. Hmph.

He doesn’t know why he keeps coming here, the only thing that’s different is the new collection of dust on the dresser. But the want to see you again keeps calling him, only to leave Scaramouche sorely disappointed. He thinks he knows every nook and cranny of your house, that is until he walks on a floorboard that caves in and nearly makes him fall. He’s about to lose his temper until he sees a piece of paper hidden under the floor. The words die in his throat as he picks it up to inspect.

To my beloved Kunikuzushi,

As I write this, you’re probably yelling at some unfortunate Fatui soul and they’re all trembling in their boots. Haha, I wish I was there to see that. You should be nicer, you know. But it is kinda funny to see you mad. I hope you come back soon… it’s getting too quiet around here without your quips and remarks.

But I know as you read this, I’m no longer alive. Kuni, I… (There are wrinkled spots around this area, presumably from your tears.)

I love you, and I don’t want rage and hatred to consume you again. I’m sorry to make your heart bear such pain again. It may be fruitless to say this, but please don’t blame yourself… it was out of our control. Please know I enjoyed every moment with you, whether you were cursing at some guy who bumped into me, even when you teased me relentlessly, or silently crying in my arms about your fate. But my favorite part was your soft smiles which grew more frequent. You are loved very much by me too. I want to see you smile more, many more times before I- (The rest of the sentence was scribbled over with a pen, making it unreadable.)

I wish I didn’t have to depart so soon… I wish I was born someone else, someone more strong and healthier… if I was, would our story be different, Kuni? Perhaps we’ll meet again one day… hopefully, sooner rather than later, and maybe I won’t be the same as I am now, but…

Will you wait for me, Kunikuzushi?

Scaramouche hated when he cried. He felt weak, stupid, and disgusting, especially when you were there. And somehow, he couldn’t help but feel worse than that when he finished reading your letter. He was never favored by the Gods, having been betrayed by one already. It seemed as though he was always fated to be betrayed by people he cared about. But he knew deep down that you didn’t betray him, he did instead by not being able to protect and save you. In an effort to bury his despair, anger, and grief, he would wipe himself clean of foolish human emotions, ready to ascend to godhood with his creator’s Gnosis…

Arlecchino:

Arlecchino’s days had been exactly the same ever since your death. They were the same as before she had met you too. Bland. Boring. Dull. It was after your passing that she truly realized how much your presence had added some thrill and color into her life. Now they were empty. But she was used to that. She had felt that way for a long time.

Arlecchino didn’t do much in her room besides sleep. Her room wasn’t anything special, just the standard and rich master bedroom. That was, until you took it upon yourself to decorate it. She hadn’t bothered to change it despite the style being very much different from hers. Today she had come in briefly to retrieve some documents under her bed. But, there was a random piece of paper there, collected dust on top of it, most likely from being placed there a long time ago. Arlecchino opened the folded paper and was greeted with your handwriting.

To my sunshine,

I bet you’re wondering why the hell I chose “sunshine” of all names. Even I can admit that you are nothing like sunshine. But I wanted to spice things up a bit, and to be honest, you bring a lot of sunshine into my heart and dreary little life, despite your stone-cold face. So yeah! I don’t think I can call you that to your face though. It’d be too scary.

I didn’t tell you, but I’ve had some people ask me why I chose to stay with you despite my health being what it is. My answer is always very easy - I love you, Arlecchino. Plain and simple. They don’t know how you are with me (which I’m kinda glad for… I want to keep this side of you to myself; yes, I know I’m greedy.) The way your lips quirk up for a split second then always turn downwards because you don’t want anyone to see. The way your eyes soften for a bit when I tell a corny joke. Or when I do anything actually. Your facial expressions are pretty cute.

Ahem, moving on from that, I guess you can say that I’m not too scared to say these things because I might be leaving you soon. Not of my free will, of course. Rather, it seems like the time my illness is allowing me to live is limited. Hopefully, you don’t notice anything off about me. I don’t think I could explain all of this in person… 

But I am really thankful to you for sticking by my side for so long. Even though you don’t tell me, I know sometimes you lament about your lack of ability to be verbally and affectionately comforting. But I hope you know that I don’t really care about that. You are more than enough for me. You’ve done a lot more than you think. I’m forever appreciative, my dear.

Arlecchino was left speechless, the usual bite in her throat died down. As someone who had few kind words to say to others, having such sweetness directed at her was not something she was used to. But of course, a part of her wasn’t surprised, because the only person who’d utter such things was you. It pained her, and even the children who cried after your death, greatly. But whenever she needed a reminder of you, she would uncharacteristically gently trace her fingertips over the words of your letter.

La Signora:

Everyone knew to stay out of La Signora’s way after your death. She was cruel before, but your passing seemed to reignite all the flames of anguish and hatred she harbored deep inside her broken heart. Once again, her walls had been put up to be unbreakable.

Rosalyne had gifted you a lot of makeup and accessories. She liked to experiment on you and liked it when you tried it yourself too. You had kept everything in a nice big box so nothing would get lost. One day she felt drawn to it again. She knew she was missing you dearly again, and although opening it would just cause her heartache, she couldn’t help but pry it open to see how you kept it. But on top was a hastily folded letter, stained a bit by the surrounding makeup, tucked into a small compartment. She flipped it open and began to scan the contents.

My dearest Rosalyne,

Hello there, pretty lady. You know, that’s the first thing I thought when I saw you. Tall pretty lady. Did you know that? Now you do. Anyway, I was wondering - how many of your flame moths can you create at a time?? Can you make them form a heart or something? 

Haha, I’m sorry for beating around the bush. The truth is I don’t know how much longer I have left. No matter how much warmth your moths provide me, for some reason, I always feel the chill of death creeping up my spine…

I don’t mean to be your second heartbreak. I’m really sorry… you deserve so much better than that. But for what it’s worth, you made my life a lot better than it was before. I hadn’t had much confidence in myself because of my illness for a long time. But you, Rosalyne… you made me feel like an actual person, as strange as that sounds. I feel like, when I’m with you, you make me feel so loved and special. I’m far from it but I actually feel like royalty. And royalty is really a life worth living. I don’t even know how you did it, but thank you. My life is so, so much happier thanks to you.

Hopefully, I make it a lot longer after I’m writing this letter. Maybe the Gods could finally take pity on me and give me some kind of blessing so I can stay with you longer. But if anything happens, I really, truly love you, Rosalyne. (The end of the letter has an origami moth colored in and taped to it.)

Signora’s hand trembled as she finished your letter. Her heart had returned to being ice, but it felt like her whole body was being swallowed up in red-hot grief and anger. Signora would dedicate herself solely to the Tsaritsa’s noble dream. It was the only thing she could do now, with nothing else to do and no one left for her freezing heart to love. No one could ever hope to understand the grief and pain she’s been through. Perhaps, that was why when she stood in front of the Raiden Shogun’s sword, she did not feel much regret.

Pantalone:

Whenever Pantalone went out, he often found himself looking through the windows of many stores to view their products. It was almost an instinct to pull out a large sum of Mora to buy anything he thought you’d like. And he still did this, only that he stopped halfway every time when he remembered that you were no longer with him. And his heart felt painfully heavy once again, like how heavy his smile felt with the pressure to keep it up.

The silence of his office had become a norm once again, your joyful presence no longer around to brighten it up. Pantalone opted to drown himself in paperwork to ignore it. Actually, he never realized how much the tick of the grandfather clock bothered him until now. Usually, your voice was loud enough to hide it. He sighed and reached for the bottom drawer to get some new pens to sign the documents. But his eyes widened as he saw a paper clearly laid out there, addressed to him at the top. His heart beat quickened as he carefully picked it up and realized it was from you. It seemed like you had experimented with some fancy calligraphy pens he had gotten you a while ago. And you had also stolen every stamp you had from him and stamped all over the paper.

Darling,

Hello, my love. Sorry for all the random stamps. I wanted to see what they looked like. Why does the Fatui need so many different-shaped stamps? You should make one of us, actually. And do you see I’ve been practicing my cursive script? (Indeed, on the back on the paper, your name has been signed in different styles.) I’ve been trying to do my signature all fancy like you. Hopefully, I’m improving.

I am thinking to make you read me a bedtime story tonight. I found a new one that seemed pretty cute. It’s a commoner falling in love with a nobleman… a tale of forbidden romance. It seems to go fine, until the commoner s/cc/mbs to (It seems that you scratched off the rest of the sentence.) Actually, I won’t spoil the ending for you. But by the time you read this letter, we may have finished it already. I’m just going to abuse that pretty voice of yours as much as I can (kidding of course… but no joke. Have you tried some kind of service where you just read things to people? I think you’d make a lot of money from that. I sure would give all my life savings to you.)

I guess since I’m writing this, I should say another thing I’m thinking about. I’m not sure how much longer I can hang on. I’m trying my best because I don’t want to let you down. I know you’ve been trying your best, with all these fancy doctors and equipment, but um… yeah. But I should also say that I’m not regretful having spent my time with you. You made the last days of my life so relaxing, so stress-free, so… nice. I’m glad I don’t need to worry about anything with you. Let’s move on from this, actually.

I’m thinking of a lot of things, actually. I wonder what you made the chef prepare for us tonight. Mhm… I’m getting hungry. Will you feed me dessert again too? Hah, I’m going to miss thinking about such mundane things. Hmm, I think I can hear your voice down the hall, so I’ll wrap this up. I love you.

Pantalone gazed at your words forlornly, his mouth formed into a downwards line. He had never thought the loss of something besides Mora could squeeze his heart so painfully, but here you were, making his eyes sting once again. Blinking back any tears, he made sure to store your letter in a safe place. He made a note to visit your grave today. He’d bring your favorite snack too, and read you a story perhaps.

Sandrone:

It was almost ironic - the puppet master had become a puppet herself. She didn’t speak much to others anymore, choosing to lock herself up in her lab. A part of her debated making some kind of robot or doll replica of you. But it would never be the same. She wouldn’t feel your warmth, or your natural, free laugh. Nothing would be similar.

Sandrone had begun inspections on all of her created robots. It was a grueling process she had gotten used to, but she missed the chirping of your voice as she did so. She worked in silence, opening the compartment of one of them when she was caught off guard by a formerly white paper, caked in dust, inside. The only person who had access to her Automatons was you. So could it possibly be…?

My forever,

I’m actually writing this in the same room as you. You're too preoccupied with your robot building and engineering and all that stuff, so you don’t notice me rushing to write all of this. I’ll make this quick. Actually, it’s hard to concentrate when you look so pretty and intelligent. Ahh, I’m so lucky to have you with me.

I think you’re repairing one of your robots so it can lift us up and take us on a walk. I’m excited. Those are always so much fun. I know you aren’t a sappy person. But I want to make my feelings clear, since I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to watch you unscrew some bolts and hammer down the nails. I don’t need to say it outright, do I? We both know I’ve been getting worse. Neither of us wants to say it out loud, but it’s reality.

Before I go, let me make it clear, since I know you like being blunt. You are my everything. Seeing your cute little robots send me these cute little messages really made my day. I think you told me a long time ago that you didn’t care much about human emotions. I think that’s changed now. I love waking up to see that calm and content expression on your face and watching it become a bit more softer when you see me. You’re more human than you think, you know. Some people think that being cooped up in a lab with a Harbinger is not an ideal way to live. But I beg to differ. I would choose no other way to live as long as I’m with you, Sandrone.

I think you’re finished with your tinkering. I’m going to have one of the robots hide this paper in them. I think some of them like me better than you >:) I wonder how long it’ll be until you find it. Hopefully, you don’t find it too quickly because it’ll be awkward to explain this to you. Either way… I love you dearly, Sandrone.

Sandrone gently brushed off the dust on your letter. She wished she found it sooner. She didn’t know whether it was good or bad her heart was finally feeling some emotion again, but she was grateful to have some final parting words from you. Sandrone had a bubble of inspiration float up in her. She had a good idea of what she was going to build next.

Childe:

Childe had found it after he was cleaning out your apartment in Liyue. He wanted to bring all of your stuff to his home in Snezhnaya. No matter how much he tried, he couldn’t throw any of your items away, even the random useless trinkets. Childe’s chest felt hollow as he opened the door to your residence. He expected to see your face brighten and eagerly pull yourself out of bed to hug him. He’d easily lift you off the floor and spin you around, drinking in your gleeful giggles as he pressed his lips to yours. But now it was just the creak of the floorboards as he walked in.

Childe had a memory connected to every piece of clothing that you had. That one he gifted to you for your birthday. Another he remembered twirling you around in on a picnic. One of his sweaters that he doesn't remember you stealing from him, mingled with your scent and his. Archons, his chest hurt so badly, but there was nothing he could do as he neatly placed your items in boxes, emptiness consuming him. He was finishing up the packing when a piece of paper folded in half fell out of one of your pants’ pockets. Childe picked it up and his eyes widened when he recognized your handwriting and his real name. Sitting down on your bed, he began to read.

To my one and only Ajax,

My greatest wish is that you’ll never find and read this letter because it means that we’re living our best lives. We’re happy, content, still deeply in love with each other… living in bliss. 

But if you’re reading this, then we probably didn’t go and do all of the cool and exciting things you wanted us to. I didn’t move to Sneznhnaya and I didn’t meet the rest of your family. We didn’t go travel to all the nations like you wanted to…

Heh, that’s too bad. I was really looking forward to seeing the same sights you saw on your travels. The pretty bloom of Inazuma’s sakura trees, the beautiful snow-covered streets of Snezhnaya. Remember that time you asked me if I wanted to conquer the world with you? Of course, since I can’t ever say no to you, I accepted your proposition. But in my head, I couldn’t help but think that you should probably choose someone who can match your ability and someone who is act/a/ly g/i/g to b/ ali/e. (The previous words have been haphazardly erased, making it hard to make out.)

You know I… (The ink here has bled through the paper, most likely due to you stopping there for a good while.) I don’t even know what to say, I’m just sorry. I don’t wanna leave you, I wanna be by your side forever, wanna be attacked by your cuddles every day. But the only thing I can do now is to make sure you understand that I’m truly grateful for you. No one else has ever cared about me as much as you did. You never stopped believing in me and always smiled when I needed you. You made my feeble life worth living.

Please don’t be sad. Teucer and the rest of your siblings need you. I love you so very much…

He didn’t realize how hard he was digging his fingernails into his skin until he started bleeding through the paper. Childe had been through endless battles, and fought countless enemies, but no wound had ever burned as badly as his heart did right now. Even in the Abyss, he did not feel as bottomless of despair as he felt right now. He wanted to hold you again too, Childe thought. He wanted to kiss you all over and show you how much he loved you. But you were gone, and the letter just solidified it more. He laid down on your bed, hand covering his forehead as he stared blankly at your ceiling. Biting down on his lip hard, he tried to prevent tears from flowing again. He would just go back to being the Tsarista’s weapon again, drowning himself in battle and blood just to feel something after your death.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #dottore x reader #capitano x reader #pantalone x reader #scaramouche x reader #childe x reader #pierro x reader #columbina x reader #arlecchino x reader #la signora x reader #sandrone x reader #il dottore x reader #tartaglia x reader #fatui harbingers x reader #fatui x reader #genshin dottore #pantalone genshin #fragile reader <3

[qtboni]

Hello, bonnie! 👋 May I please request something for the TF141 boys and König (bcz i luv him) where reader got dem cold ass hands and hugs them?

HELLO DEAR ANONNIE !! THIS WAS SO CUTE OMG IM BLUSHING SO HARD . also i might have favored könig's part a lil bit HSJDHDJ cus i wuv him too dwdw ANYW HERE YOU GO <3

╰﹒ 𝐇𝐔𝐆 𝐌𝐄 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄 !

PAIRING: Task Force 141 Members X Gn!Reader

OVERVIEW: Cold hands for Cuddles <33

C/W: Entirely fluff! + kissies and huggies, little suggestive at Soap's part .

── ◜‹3◞  CAP.N JOHN PRICE :

"Oh, don't worry about that. These hands have withstood much worse."

It's a cold evening, and John is snuggled up on the couch with you, watching a movie and holding hands. He can feel the way you're trying to squeeze all the warmth you can from his hands, but they're already freezing.

Then, he noticed that your hands were undeniably cold and couldn't help but chuckle. "Mmm, looks like we've got a couple of ice cubes over here." he said, mimicking a shiver as you watch him.

"Hey!" you exclaimed and smacked his shoulder playfully, feeling the warm, soft texture of his shirt. He chuckled and squeezed your hands tighter together with his, and wraps his free arm around you, pulling you closer. He holds you in his strong arms, and had you sitting on his lap, and you can't help but feel a sense of comfort and safety.

"Don't worry, sugar," John replied, nuzzling into your neck. "These hands have been through a lot, but they're always there for you, just like I am."

You hug him back, feeling grateful for his love and warmth. John can feel the way you lean into him, as if he's your anchor in this ever-changing world. He knows then and there that he will always be there for you and that your love will never fade, even in the chilliest nights. You feel his beating heart, as if it keeps his love for you alive, even after all these years.

"You're the best," you said, snuggling closer to him.

"Of course I am," he replied with a smug grin. "But let's not forget that without me, you'd be lost in this cold, oh such cruel world. I'm your knight in shining armor, saving you from the perils of winter."

You can't help but laugh at his witty response. "You're a dork," you said, smiling.

"I know," he said, holding you tighter. "But I'm your dork, sugar. And I wouldn't have it any other way."

You feel his warm breath on your neck, as if he's whispering sweet nothings in your ear, words of pure love and devotion. He's there for you, no matter what.

As John leaned in for a kiss, you can feel the warmth of his lips against yours, making you smile. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you closer, and you felt a rush of emotions wash over you. It was as if the cold, cruel world around you disappeared, and the only thing that mattered was John and the love you share.

In that moment, you knew that you were exactly where you were supposed to be, wrapped in John's arms and sheltered from the perils of winter. And as long as you had him, everything would be alright.

── ◜‹3◞  SIMON ‘GHOST’ RILEY :

"I think I know just the thing to warm you up."

It's undeniably cold inside your home. "Simon," you whine, burying your face in his shoulder to steal some of his warmth. "I'm still freezing."

Simon chuckles, pulling you closer. "Oh my, you're like a popsicle in the middle of a blizzard," he teases, hugging you even tighter and clasping your cold hands into his. "But I think I know just the thing to warm you up."

"What's that?" you ask, your teeth still chattering.

"I'm going to put you in a microwave," Simon responds, deadpan.

You laugh, but he's not joking— and as he picks you up and heads to the kitchen, you realize his suggestion isn't so funny after all.

"Simon..?" You can't help but shudder as you imagine being stuck in a small, enclosed space, surrounded by the deafening hum of the microwave as it fries you alive. But Simon doesn't seem to notice your fear; his eyes are fixed on the microwave as he punches in the timer and sets it to the maximum setting.

As you wait for your fate, you can't help but wonder what could possibly possess Simon to do such a thing. Is it just his quirky sense of humor, or something deeper?

The microwave beeps to signal that it's finished, and Simon nervously opens the door. You hold your breath as you peek inside. To your surprise, the heat inside came pouring out and warming you up. But it ended as the door closed up.

"You know, love," Simon said with a chuckle. "I didn't think you'd actually take me seriously."

You turned to him. "What do you mean?" you asked, your teeth chattering still from the cold.

Simon grinned, pulling off his sweater and handing it to you. "Here, wear this. I'll keep you warm," he said, his voice full of compassion.

You hesitated, knowing that the sweater would be cold, but you were grateful for the offer nonetheless. You slipped the sweater on and felt the cold fabric against your skin. You shivered but as you leaned against Simon, you felt his warmth start to penetrate through the sweater.

"There you go," Simon said with a satisfying smile. He stroked your hair and nuzzled his face against your cheek. "All warm and cozy now."

"Thank you, Si'," you said, feeling grateful for his kindness.

"Of course, anything for you, love," he replied, kissing your forehead. You couldn't help feeling grateful to have such a warm and caring person in your life, and you resolved to show him the same warmth and care in return.

── ◜‹3◞  JOHNNY ‘SOAP’ MACTAVISH :

"It's like a portable chiller, aye?"

Johnny's eyes sparkled with a teasing twinkle as you approached him with your cold hands. He was quick to respond with his usual wit and charm.

"Cold hands, warm heart, eh?" he said with a grin, taking your hands in his and rubbing them together briskly. His warm touch sent a tingly sensation up your arms, and you felt your mood lifting instantly.

"I like it, babe," Johnny said with a wink, pulling your arms to his neck as he continued to hug you. "It's like a portable chiller, aye?"

You couldn't help but laugh at the joke, feeling your spirits lift with each passing moment. Johnny was always the life of the party, and his funny nature was one of the things that made him so attractive to you. But what you appreciated most about Johnny was his genuine kindness. He was always there for you, no matter what, and he was always quick with a joke to make you feel better.

"That's a good one," you whispered as you nuzzing closer to him, closing your eyes and enjoying the moment you two shared together.

As you stood there in his arms, you felt the warmth of his body and the familiarity of his embrace. It was a feeling that you never wanted to end, and you were grateful for his kind words and thoughtful actions. He was a constant source of comfort and laughter, and you knew that you could always count on him to make you smile.

Suddenly, with a mischievous glint in his eye, Johnny leaned in close and whispered in your ear. "Now that your hands are warm, maybe we can think about warming up the rest of you," he said, his breath hot on your skin.

Johnny's words sent a shiver up your spine, and you felt a tingle of excitement as his lips brushed against your ear. You could smell the warm scent of his breath and the musk of his body all around you, and you were aware of your heart beating just a little bit faster.

You then felt your cheeks flush with embarrassment at his teasing, but you couldn't help but smile at his playful antics. Johnny was always full of surprises, and his sense of humor was one of the things that you loved about him.

"You're too much, love," you muttered with a grin, shaking your head.

"I try," Johnny said with a smile. "But seriously, I'll warm you up. I don't want you to catch a cold."

You nodded in agreement, grateful for the concern in Johnny's voice. His arms tightened around you, and you felt your entire body warm up as his warmth radiated through you.

Johnny pulled you into a warm embrace, his body pressed against yours as you leaned into him. You felt him smile against your neck, and his hands slid down your back, his touch electric with anticipation.

Despite the playful banter, Johnny's arms were like a warm, comforting embrace around you, and you felt safe and secure in his presence. Whether he was making you laugh with his hilarious jokes or supporting you with his genuine kindness, Johnny was always there for you, and you were grateful for every moment you spent together.

── ◜‹3◞  KYLE ‘GAZ’ GARRICK :

"You know, that felt kind of nice."

You've been outside for a while, and it's colder than usual. So when you and Kyle hugged each other goodbye, you can't help but notice how cold your hands are compared to how warm his body is. Without thinking, you wrap your arms around him and caressed his back with your cold hands.

Kyle felt a soft touch against his back.

"Oh!" He muttered, surprised by the feeling of your cold hands. At first, he was caught off-guard by the suddenness of the gesture, but as he felt the warmth and tenderness of your embrace, he relaxed and found himself enjoying the hug more than expected.

The surprise quickly gave way to pleasure as he felt a soothing sensation envelop his body. "You know, that felt kind of nice," Kyle mumbled, turning to you with a soft grin.

You were taken aback by the sincerity of his words, but you couldn't help but feel a flush of warmth spread across your cheeks.

"Really?" You smiled to yourself. As you pulled away from the hug, you saw the twinkle in Kyle's eyes. And for a moment, he felt like you were the only two people in the world.

"Yes, I didn't even realize how cold you were until your hands crawled into my back," Kyle says with a gentle smile. "But it felt kind of comforting, like you were giving me a little bit of your warmth."

You feel your heart flutter. It's small moments like this that make you realize just how much he means to you.

Your heart is racing as he pulls you closer to him, and you feel the warmth of his body surround yours. Kyle's hand then stroked your neck gently, and you closed your eyes feeling safe and loved.

"I love you, Kyle," you whisper, feeling the words pour out of you like a dam bursting.

His eyes widen, and he looks deep into your eyes. "I love you too," he says softly, and nuzzled his head into your neck.

He pulls you closer to him, wrapping his arms around you gently. You feel his warmth envelop your body, and for a moment, you feel like you're truly one with him. His heart is beating at the same rhythm as yours, and you feel a sense of connection between the two of you that is difficult to explain, but that feels so real and true.

Kyle kisses your forehead, and you close your eyes, feeling truly loved and complete.

And as you continue to hold each other, you can't help but notice how Kyle's arms tighten around you, as though he's trying to hold onto every moment of warmth he can get from your embrace.

── ◜‹3◞  KÖNIG :

"Your hands are so cold, mein liebling :(("

You and König are in his room, where he keeps his gun safe. He's been feeling a little anxious lately, and hasn't had a chance to clean his rifle in a while. So tonight, after dinner, he decided to take some time to give it a good cleaning.

It's been a while since he's held his gun, so he's surprised by how well-balanced it feels in his hands. He loves the way the metal feels against his skin, the weight of it in his grip. He takes a deep breath and begins to dismantle the gun, cleaning and checking each part carefully before putting it back together again.

He's lost in his own thoughts, focused on the task at hand, until your sudden appearance behind him.

"RAWR!" you exclaimed, a wide smile appears in your face.

König lets out a little gasp of surprise as you wrap your cold hands around him, pulling him into a tight hug. "Hase," he whines, still startled by the coldness of your hands. "Your hands are so cold."

Despite his own surprise and confusion, he can't help but feel a little bit charmed by your sudden, playful hug. He can't help but smile at the absurdity of it all.

"Hehe," you giggled and showed him your toothy grin. "That's why I'm the cuddle monster!"

You pull him closer to you, burying your cold hands beneath the warmth of the hoodie he's wearing that you've stolen from him at least three times already. He lets out a little squeak of surprise before settling back into your embrace.

But he can't help but feel a little bit of concern for you. He understands how uncomfortable cold hands can be, especially in this weather. And he can't bear the thought of having his own partner suffering like this. So, unable to resist the temptation, he decides to do something about it.

He pulls away from your embrace, feeling a little bit self-conscious about what he's about to do. But he knows that it's for your own good. He looks around for anything that might warm up your hands, and settles on the hot metal tea cup beside him. He reaches for it, careful not to spill the boiling hot water inside, and hands it to you.

The cup feels warm and comforting in your hands, the heat spreading through your body and warming up the tips of your fingers. You give him a grateful smile, and take a small sip from the tea. It's slightly bitter, probably due to the over-brewed tea. But you don't mind; the warmth it gives you makes it worthwhile. You take another sip, feeling the warmth spread through your body.

König watches you savor the tea, feeling happy that he could help you. He knows how hard you've been working lately, and he wants to make sure you're always taken care of. He can't help but feel a little bit proud of himself, knowing that he was able to make you happy with something so simple.

You finish the tea, handing the cup back to him. He takes it from you and sets it down on the table as he gives you a small smile, feeling content.

"Your hands okay now?" he asks as his thick German accent seeps through, concerned for your well-being. He grabs both of your hands and blew warm air from his lips to them, making them warmer.

You feel a wave of warmth and comfort wash over you as his warm breath hits your cold hands. In the moment, everything seems to slow down, and you feel a sense of calmness and reassurance wash over you. You can't help but feel grateful for Simon's kindness and thoughtfulness, and you can't help but smile at the genuine concern in his voice.

You nod, grateful for his kindness. "Yes, they are, thank you," you reply, still blushing from the intimacy of the moment.

He lets go of your hands, and your cheeks grow even hotter as you feel the warmth from his breath lingering on your skin. You both share an intense eye contact for a few moments, feeling a deep connection in that moment.

"I'll always take care of you, hase," he whispers, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead. You can't help but melt into his embrace, feeling his warmth wash over you like a comforting blanket. He pulls you closer, wrapping his arms tighter around you, as if to protect you from the cold outside world.

A/N: hello !! i still hve a lot of ur requests to write on so pls be patient w me :)) also upd ,, i will be quite busy tomorrow bcz i hve a big event to attend to ! might hve to resume working on the reqs a day after that .

#👾 — [bonnie’s wk] #cod x reader #captain price x reader #john price x reader #john price x you #simon ghost riley x you #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader #soap x you #soap x reader #soap mactavish x reader #gaz x reader #gaz x you #kyle garrick x reader #cod fanfic #cod x you #cod modern warfare #ghost cod #ghost x reader #konig cod #konig x you #konig x reader #könig x you #könig x reader #tf 141 x reader #call of duty mw2 #call of duty x reader #simon riley smut #cod smut #cod fluff

[hannibals-favourite-meal]

Hello 👋 I just wanted to ask if it's ok to request and if it is can I ask for an alpha Jason Todd x Omega chubby female reader smut plz. Also I really enjoyed your Mando and Logan story they were really good.

A World of Colours

Alpha!Jason Todd x omega!reader

Jason thought all the good had been drained from the world, but he has been wrong before

Warnings: smut, unprotected sex (reader is on bc), Jason has a slight fear of pregnancy, pull-out method

WC: 1k

Minors DNI

When Jason came back from the dead, he thought that everything good in the world died along with him. Everything was bleak and stuck in an eternal grey, the colour drained from his life. He spent his days training, getting bigger and stronger, determined to never be caught off guard again, even by his own family.

He was distrusting, brutish, violent and a borderline feral alpha. Even his own father was terrified of him (not that he would admit it).

So it was quite the shock when, on a surprise visit to his apartment that totally wasn’t to make sure that Jason was still alive, Dick found the place spotless and with the distinctive scent of an omega soaked into every inch of the small studio.

And even more shocking was his little brother standing in the small kitchenette fucking crooning to the plump woman sitting on the counter as he cooked her breakfast. “Did I have a stroke? Am I stroking out? Does anyone smell toast?” Jason rolled his eyes at his older brother and stepped forward as if to shield you.

“Of course you smell toast Dickhead, I’m making some.” Your laugh carried through through the small space like the ringing of bells and Dick watched as Jason’s posture relaxed and his scent became sweet with absolute love. 

It was then that Dick noticed both their states of undress (him being just in boxers and her in a shirt that must have been his) and the potent smell of sex. “I think I’m just gonna go.” He started backing out of the room.

“Yeah how about you do that?” You slapped Jason’s shoulder and hissed a “be nice”. Still thoroughly freaked out, Dick increased his pace. 

“Just uh, just remember that B wants everyone at dinner this Friday. Bring your girl.” He slammed the front door behind him, fully convinced he was having a very strange dream.

You watched the entryway for a moment before you were distracted by a soft brush of lips against your neck. “Jay.” A moan slipped from you involuntarily as Jason’s huge hands traveled from laying on the countertop to cupping your wide hips, squeezing the already bruised skin. 

“Yes princess?” He mouthed at your sensitive mating gland, applied just enough pressure to the raised skin to make your back arch forward with arousal.

“We just had sex ten minutes ago. Haven’t you had enough?” Offended, he pulled away for just a moment to look into your eyes.

“I could never have enough of you, and right now princess, I’m feeling very greedy.” You yelped when suddenly your ass was hanging off the edge of the counter after Jason tugged you forward. There was a dull thud that you knew was the sound of his boxers hitting the old kitchen tile. 

The musky smell of tobacco and hot chocolate filled the air as Jason’s eyes got darker with desire and you felt his hard cock against the soft skin of your plump thighs. He was already throbbing, with beads of pre-cum bathing on the uncut head. Slick pooled between your legs in response, your omega perfectly happy at the progress of this morning so far.

Reaching between you, you grasped him tightly and guided him to your entrance. “Go on then, alpha. Sate your hunger.”  His massive paws skirted down your body to settle on the small of your back. The tip of his nose brushed against yours in a loving manner.

“Yes, omega.” He answered dutifully and then slammed forward. 

“Alpha!” You mewled. Pleasure shot through you with each roll of his hips. “Feel s’good.” The counter dug into your hips as he thrust into you. 

“That’s it, that’s my girl.” Even though your love had fucked you mere minutes before, your pussy still burned with the stretch of his cock. The thick ring of muscle of his knot pressed tingly to your already stuffed hole whenever the head of his cock bashed against your cervix.

As you wrapped yourself around him, Jason buried his face into your neck. He covered his teeth with his lips so he could bite down on the spot that would bind you to him forever without actually leaving his mark. But it resulted in the same outcome: your body jerked forward and forced his growing knot inside of you.

“Fuck princess.” He growled against your heated skin. “Gonna make me cum already like some fucking teenager.” Your nails dug into his muscular back as your orgasm grew and grew, spurred on by the way the tick patch of hair at the base of his pelvis hit your clit with every thrust.

“‘M close.” You gasped between desperate moans. Jason groaned into your ear as his muscles tightened with his own end.

“Go on, cum for me. Cum for your alpha and I’ll give you what you want.”

“Yes yes yes!” You clamped down onto him as ecstasy washed over you in a huge wave of pleasure. Your vision whited out but he continued to thrust, needing his release.

“Fuuuuuck!” Ripping himself away from you, he pulled out of your warmth just in time to spill his hot cum onto your plush belly. “Holy shit.” 

The massive man slumped into your arms, all the energy suddenly leaving his body. You just chuckled and ran your fingers through his dark hair. “I thought you were gonna make me your twinkie.” You joked, laying a kiss to his head.

He chuckled into your throat, giving you a playful nip. “Couldn’t remember if you took your birth control this morning. Didn’t want to risk it.” Gently cupping his cheek, you guided him up to meet your eyes.

“Jay,” You cooed while debating on bringing up the subject but then quickly decided against it, “Will you at least finish making me breakfast? I’m absolutely starving.” He kissed your cheek. 

“Stay right there princess, I’ll take care of you.” 

The world used to be black and white to the feared vigilante but with you, it was a world full of colours and he wanted to share it with you.

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[lazycats-stuff]

👋Hello, hope you are having a good day/night?

If you're interested in writing it I thought of an idea Bruce(Bats) x tall male werewolf reader

Reader is on the run from hunters and is hiding in Gotham. He's way taller than Bruce, a little rough around the edges and a total badass. No one knows he's a werewolf till some hunters come to Gotham, maybe they want to kill reader because he's a werewolf or want his pelt because its rare? Your choice. And maybe a lil bit of batfam?

Of course I'm interested. It sounds interesting. I do wonder how Bruce would react to a werewolf boyfriend.

Summary: Bruce meets a werewolf. Of course he doesn't realize it right away, but once he notices different people lingering around (Y/N), he is not sure that he knows everything about (Y/N).

Warnings: Violence, shifting into a werewolf, murder, Bruce being scared of the reader (for a moment)

(Y/N) walked back home. It was 2 am and he had just finished his shift as a security guard at the club. His statue and attitude in general made is great for a security guard in a rowdy club. And it worked well in Gotham. Criminals don't really come near you and they leave you be.

And if necessary, you could help out someone. Although, even the people he helped out were afraid of him. Could he blame them? No. He is tall as Mount Everest, with muscles and looks like he is one step away from murder.

Either way, it was great.

But this city was not. He now officially hates this city. There was far too noise for his supernatural hearing. He wanted to move away, somewhere far away from everyone, with woods near him. He doesn't like to be able in human form for a long time.

He checked his watch. 2:14 am. He will be back in ten more minutes and then he will sleep. He will have to text his boyfriend that he got home.

He took a quick look around, his paranoia acting up. He went through a lot over the years, he saw a lot of violence, death and destruction. Most of his friends were gone and he was now the definition of a loner wolf.

He looked down at his phone. His boyfriend was calling.

" Hey B. "

" Hey, are you near the apartment? "

" Close. I still can't believe you would stay up so late for me. "

" You are my boyfriend who works nightshifts. I'm worried about you walking around Gotham alone. I know you are taller than me and strong as me, but I still worry. "

" Well, there is no need. I will talk to you later and go to bed. "

" Will do. "

(Y/N) hanged up and put the phone back into his pocket. He took his keys and unlocked his apartment building. He needs to get in and sleep. He was about to unlock his apartment, but the smell made him stop. Who the hell was in his apartment? He took a sniff. It smelled familiar, but he couldn't pin point where he smelled it. That wasn't good.

He unlocked the door, moving quietly inside. He pounced at the figure waiting for him. (Y/N) pinned him to the ground, freezing when he saw the face. His old friend, who was supposed to be dead.

" What... You are supposed to be dead... How are you alive? " (Y/N) asked, shocked all the way to his core.

" I faked my death, my dear friend. "

(Y/N) stood up from his now alive friend, allowing him to get up.

" Why? "

" There are hunters coming to Gotham, but they are far more dangerous then the ones you encountered before. They are looking for your pelt my friend. "

" These aren't the ones that kill? "

" No, " the man shook his head, " They are far more sadistic. They will torture you until you turn and then skin you alive. And if you are lucky then they will kill you. " He said, sitting down on the couch.

" What name do you go by? " (Y/N) asked, crossing his arms.

" Alex. You need to leave Gotham now. "

(Y/N) shook his head. He can't. He can't leave Bruce and most definitely not his boys. He loved those boys as if they were his own. He considered them a part of his pack, people he needed to protect.

" I can't Alex. I... "

" Oh my God... You got connected with someone. You got a little pack! " Alex exclaimed.

" Keep your voice down. "

" Oh my dear friend... Well, you either tell them what you are or leave them. One way or another, the hunters will come for you. "

" I know that. "

" I hope you do. I have to go, I got to go now. Stay strong. "

" What other choice do we have? " (Y/N) asked Alex, who shrugged his shoulders.

He left the apartment and (Y/N) had sat down on the couch, leaning down and putting his head in his hands. What was he going to do? He needs to tell Bruce, but for the first time in a long time he was afraid. He feared the rejection more than the hunters... His priorities were messed up.

" Shit... "

But Bruce deserved to know the truth. He could at least do that. But could his heart take the rejection? (Y/N) muttered out a fuck then he looked for his phone. No... He is going to call him in the morning and ask him to meet. He has the weekend off and the time won't be the problem... Now he has to think about what to tell Bruce. Great...

(Y/N) was driving to the manor, trying to ignore the twitching oh his fingers on the steering wheel. His heart was beating so hard that (Y/N) thought that it was going to jump out of his chest. He got past the gate and parked the car. He saw Bruce waiting already at the entrance of the house. (Y/N) took a deep breath, trying to compose himself.

He stepped out, going straight to Bruce. Bruce reached out, but (Y/N) stopped.

" Bruce, I... I need to tell you something... Well, I need to show you this, otherwise you won't believe me. "

Bruce tilted his head, clearly confused. (Y/N) took his hand and dragged him to the back of the house, the part that was covered by the woods. He could show him there.

" (Y/N) what are we doing back here? What do you need to show me?"

" Now, you are either going to hate me or kill me... Nothing in between. Are we alone? " (Y/N) asked taking his shirt off.

" Yes we are, but why are you taking your clothes off?! " Bruce asked, completely thrown off by (Y/N)'s behavior.

" Bruce, I am a werewolf. "

Bruce laughed for a second, but the laugh stopped when he saw (Y/N) in his boxers and then shifting.

The sound of bones cracking, as if they are breaking, the limbs turning into paws. Bruce saw fur that was black as night and then the most blue eyes he has ever seen. And the wolf was the biggest animal that Bruce has ever seen. And Bruce?

Bruce was in shock, eyes wide. (Y/N) whimpered and then lowered himself onto his belly. He wanted to show Bruce that he had nothing to fear, that he wasn't going to hurt him.

It took Bruce a moment to snap back. He crouched down, reaching out to (Y/N)'s head. He wanted to pet it. Why? The fur seemed soft and (Y/N) lowered himself on his belly.

" It's okay, I'm not going to hate you. " Bruce consoled his lover. (Y/N) sighed in happiness, moving closer to Bruce, wagging his big tail. He gently licked Bruce's hands.

Bruce smiled, scratching (Y/N)'s ears.

" I have a secret to tell you myself. Well, I have to show you too. "

(Y/N) shifted back to his human form, now only in boxers. He put his clothes on quickly, then hugged Bruce.

" Thank you... For not rejecting me... "

" I would never do that hun. Did something happen? "

" Yeah... Can we go inside? "

Bruce nodded, taking his lover inside. They sat at the couch, holding hands.

" So, if you are not a human in this world, there are going to be hunters after you. If you are a werewolf, you will hunted for your fur... But now, there is a new type of hunters. The ones that are far more sadistic, the one that torture you until you turn and then make sure you stay in that... Form as they skin you..." (Y/N) stopped, choking on his breath.

Bruce squeezed his hands, to calm him.

" Sweetie, that won't happen to you. "

" How do you know that? " (Y/N) asked, closing his eyes for a moment.

" Because I am Batman. "

(Y/N) opened his eyes and looked at Bruce. What? But... Everything fit together.

" Oh my God... "

" Yeah... " Bruce said, turning his head to the side with a small, nervous smile.

" I have questions about your werewolf side. Way to many. And I would like to get rid of those hunters for good. Well, not kill them, but... Make sure that they won't come back to Gotham. "

" What are we going to tell the boys? And Alfred? "

" They will understand, trust me hun, we have seen stuff that... Well, we have seen a lot. I think they will even cuddle with you even more. Damian will love you even more. "

(Y/N) smiled, moving closer to Bruce, kissing him gently. Bruce wrapped his arms around (Y/N), bringing him into his lap.

" Okay, you two need to get a room. " Jason said, turning his head away.

(Y/N) and Bruce moved away from one another, trying not to blush.

" Jason, why are you home earlier? " Bruce asked his son.

Jason has shrugged his shoulders and went to the kitchen. (Y/N) glanced at Bruce with a small smile. It will an interesting evening to say the least.

The reveal of (Y/N)'s werewolf side went well. Damian was the first to hug (Y/N)'s wolf and demanded that (Y/N) be in his werewolf form more. He won't take no for an answer. But they were mad once they heard about hunters trying to hurt their new dad.

Bastards. Jason was ready to kill them. (Y/N) had to restrain him to not do anything stupid. And that's why Jason was now on (Y/N)'s lap. He didn't mind it.

" Okay, then what is the plan? Hunters are close to Gotham and we need to protect you. You are like our second dad... " Dick said, looking down at the floor.

" Well, I wanted to ask you this question for a while... Would you like to move in with us? " Bruce asked, hope shining in his eyes.

" Of course. You guys are my pack now. "

Jason leaned back, wrapping (Y/N) arms around him.

" It's official. You are our new dad. " Jason said, nodding to himself.

" Well, I say we set a trap for the hunters. " Damian said, standing up from the chair he was sitting in.

" An ambush you mean? " Tim asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

" Of course. (Y/N) gave us the descriptions and we can track them easily. They are going to pay. " Damian said, fire burning in his eyes.

Bruce looked a bit worried, but he couldn't exactly blame his son either. Nobody should go through what (Y/N) went through. Nobody.

" Hun, you stay put and we will deal with them. " Bruce said, taking his cowl. Jason stood up from (Y/N)'s lap and joined the others. They got ready and with a hug went to the car. Bruce gave (Y/N) a quick kiss and then a hug.

" Wait here, we will be back soon. "

(Y/N) nodded, sitting back down. He glanced at Alfred, the person who was quiet this entire time.

" I'm happy you are here master (Y/N), don't worry about my opinion. You have made master Bruce happy and the boys have accepted you. What more could I ask for? " Alfred said, smiling at (Y/N).

" You know, I have always wanted your approval. "

Alfred hummed, smiling at the werewolf.

" Well, you don't have to worry about that. I see the way you look at Bruce and the boys... You love them like they are your own and you are not freaked out by master Bruce night job. You are quite okay with that. And maybe I favor you more than Bruce. "

(Y/N) nodded, standing up and then hugging Alfred.

" Thanks Alfred. "

Alfred hugged back. (Y/N) was finally happy. He found the man he loves, the kids he loves as if they were his own... He found his pack. He finally found his pack.

#bruce wayne x male reader #batman x male reader #batfamily #dc comics #dc x male reader

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

hii! using the same prompt as the "farmer as a walking dead (part 2)" could i possibly get magnus' reaction to seeing his spouse like that? (aka magnus reacting to the farmer being able to control themselves despite being practically dead)

if your requests aren't open then i am SO sorry, i saw that the status was set to open and just assuned they were

Hello, dear anon! 👋

You read that right - my askbox is open again, so welcome and don't be shy to ask something again! Thanks for the ask btw (mmm, angst and pain, my favorite 🥲) and enjoy!

"It was all my fault..."

_________________________________________

The Farmer was lucky that it was Camilla who first discovered them, as other mages and adventurers would have simply destroyed the already not quite alive youth without even looking into it. The head witch of the Castle Village was able to hide the frightened and confused Farmer, who had been missing for about a month, and help them figure out what had happened. It didn't take long to figure it out, because outwardly Farmer was no different from empty shells, shadows of those former adventurers who had fallen victim to the dark ancient magic of the cursed deserts. Except that unlike all of them, Farmer retained their mind and memory.

It was a shock to everyone, and it was naturally that it was a huge shock to Magnus, who rushed into the room where everyone was standing, along with Camilla and Farmer.

The witch had already wanted to punish the one who had blabbed to Magnus about Farmer before his due date. The fact that Farmer was alive, but not quite, was definitely a huge blow to Magnus, and the Castle Village witch wanted to try to soften the blow, for the sake of her old friend.

Confused, angry, hurt, exhausted by sleepless nights and the immense guilt over the death of his most beloved person, Magnus walked up to the Farmer, despite the others' best efforts to stop the wizard.

Some expected a great tirade, some even expected Magnus to start a fight with someone out of an overabundance of emotion. But all the wizard did was to hug the Farmer, who couldn't even say anything in his defense.

All the Farmer's clothes were covered in blood and dirt, they themselves smelled of death, their hearts didn't beat.... And yet, it was them. It was the same Farmer who had smiled their snow-white smile at Magnus that last time they had headed into the Crimson Badlands. It was them...

And Magnus had let them go, let them die...

"Magnus, it's not your fault."

It was all his fault...

"Magnus."

It's all his fault, and he knows it...

"Magnus, look at me."

And he did. He raised his head and directed the look of his moist eyes at Farmer's face.

Even though Farmer's pupils had turned scarlet as rubies and the whites of their eyes were dark as void, it was still the same Farmer.

#sve #stardew valley expanded #sdv wizard #sdv rasmodius #magnus rasmodius #thanks for the ask! #sdv farmer #sve headcanon

[ensnapemysenses]

Hey guys idk how many of you actually check my blog often but I figured I’d leave a little message with a life update. If you’ve been wondering where I’ve been, hello 👋 I am still alive lol. However I just wanted to pop in and say that I’m not really writing fanfics anymore. I am still writing but currently I’m working on several massive projects of my own that are taking up all my time and creativity. I’ll still be active here and there, but for a while I will not be writing any fics or answering any requests in my inbox. I might just post everything in there for ideas for other people because if I’m being honest I just have no motivation to write anything sitting in there right now.

Anyway… Thank you for all the support and for giving me the push that I needed to write my own stories. Here’s to the hope I actually see them through and perhaps publish them one day 😊

- Fenix

🥰🫶💕

[cssnder]

Hello! 👋 What motivates/inspires you to write and keep writing?

For one, I cannot not write. I am a storyteller, I've always been, ever since I was a child and I'd go as far as to say that it's literally in my blood. As a child, I used to write plenty: short stories; novels; poems, that I would hang on the door to my bedroom; but also and this, all of my family remembers it, I used to improvise stories aloud for my siblings. Oh, well, you can imagine they were all silly stories (I was only a child trying to entertain smaller children after all), but it doesn't change the fact that I was still expressing my nature, as a storyteller. I don't think this is something that'll ever leave me — how does one escape themselves?

One of the things that motivates me is giving to other people as much as I give to myself through my writing. For my novel to be the reason they stay up at night reading or do not hear their mothers calling to them that the dinner's ready. To bring them into another world, even for a brief instant, and make them forget about their reality. And if they don't forget, to have them feel seen, or come to terms with their own feelings, the way Fyodor Dostoevsky has more than once helped many of us throughout the centuries. Which brings me to these quotes by James Baldwin:

“You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was books that taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, who had ever been alive.”

“You read something which you thought only happened to you, and you discover that it happened 100 years ago to Dostoyevsky. This is a very great liberation for the suffering, struggling person, who always thinks that he is alone. This is why art is important.”

This, exactly this, is what motivates me most, aside from the sheer joy of creation.

#Asks

[howtotrainyourhiccup]

hii! does anyone have any canon-compliant hiccstrid fic recs? 🥺 bonus points if they are post-marriage/httyd 3 era lol

also hello i don’t think i formally announced my return but i am hyperfixated on httyd again and am using this blog i feel like i’m 16 again 👋🫡 3 years after the franchise has ended.. i don’t know if the fandom is still alive but if it is HELLLOOOO AGAIN HTTYD WOOORLD

#hiccstrid #dadcup #momstrid #httyd 3 #married!hiccstrid #parent!hiccstrid #thw #pregstrid #hiccstrid fanfics #hiccstrid fanfiction #httyd

[gommih]

Hello!! 👋

Do you still do art of sun and moon show?? I liked the idea of Lunar being more smart and dangerous than he looks.

And that idea where Lord Eclipse merging both Lunar and Moon IAs to obey him was scary and interesting at the same time.

Do you have other ideas for that?? (Sorry if im bothering you)

You are not bothering me at all! I am happy to answer you! I sadly stopped watching the show for a good few months now. I am not really aware of what happened in the series. Although i can tell you about what was my idea for the "Lunar Is Bored" art (potential AU if you wish) and the "Eclipse Won" theory that I gave up quite rapidly after the episode as i didn't see a point in continuing it. Although i can still create a new design for it (i am inspired to do so now!). I did have a few ideas for it. But it surely doesn't align with the current events of the series.

Lunar Is Bored :

Basically Lunar is like any "evil" character. Although a bit different?? His only motivation is to have fun, to cry and other. Lunar is only dangerous when he gets bored. If doing something morally bad is the only way to have entertainment he'll do it with the sweetest smile on his face. That does not mean that their only entertainment is violence or psychological torture. Pretty much everything is entertaining like feeding alive ducks for example. The boring part for him is when life begins to be static. He does not like routines, he adores change too much to stay in a single pace. What they do crave is the rush of any feelings. This Lunar is pretty much unpredictable. He is capable of many things just for the sake of entertainment.

Eclipse Won Theory :

At first I thought of this vision as Lord Eclipses personal trophy. The AIs have merged in a forceful and painful way. Eclipse Keeps them traped somewhere unknown and makes them watch their friends sufferin his "perfect" world. Although at first I thought that Eclipse would have killed Sun, but seing the episode and how Sun reacted to moon made me think of a better idea. Sun is the same as the one in the episode. He doesn't remember his brother(s) and his affraid of the fusion because of whatever story or warning Eclipse told him. Of course that makes the fusion helpless and powerless. And so they break. There not much to torture now and that bores Eclipse. Eclipse doesn't want to keep a mindless trophy. So the fusion is now some kind of "archivist". They are sentenced to wander aimlessly in those grand halls of books filled with lies.

#the sun and moon show #sams #sun and moon show #sun and moon show moon #sun and moon show lunar #sams au #sams lunar #sams moon #mentionned sams eclipse #mentionned sams sun

[bellswlw]

um hello👋 gay people in my phone i hope you all had a good day😁 and laughed🤣 just a little bit🤏. let’s all be friends and hang out and just be girls together anywho going to slumberland🙏💤

and not to sound insane but sept is suicide awareness month and i am very glad everyone is still here and alive and not a tree or in the sea just yet. you’re all worth knowing, night night<3

#got a little deep but #i feel grateful rn #i’m glad i get to know people #and make little friendship webs and hang out in them like hammocks or something #this is very cool #you all are cool #jupjup talks ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ #<33 #night #PSSSSSSSSS #i saw bottoms today it was. fucking amazing #the whole cast is mwah mwah mwah ugh 10/10 #alright goodnight 👍 😊 #💤 😴 🥱

[cha-melodius]

Lokius whump prompt requester here 👋

Seriously how does your brain work because what you wrote is totally unexpected BUT SO FITTING to the prompt and freaking AMAZING 😭 Thanks for taking the prompt and introducing me to time-loop trope because I can already feel the WHUMP!

Hello anon, thank you again for the wonderful prompt, and I'm sorry it's taken me apparently a month to get to chapter 2 (a month! how did that happen?!). But I am happy to finally have it for you, although there's still a chapter 3 to come, hopefully sooner than later! So here it is:

It's Been a Bad Day Lately, Chapter 2

Chapter 2 on AO3 | Chapter 1

Loki doesn’t actually tell anyone about the device or his apparent foreknowledge of the day the first time through. After all, even if it seems that everyone else is completely ignorant of what the hell is going on, that doesn’t mean the TVA isn’t behind it somehow. They’re the Time Variance Authority after all. Repeating days feels like something they’d traffic in. He wants to trust Mobius at least, but he can’t help but be reminded that this Mobius still doesn’t know him, not really, and he can’t rule out that Mobius is purposefully being kept in the dark. It would track with how things were running before.

He can’t even be sure if he’s truly reliving the day—which doesn’t really seem possible, given what he knows about timelines and traveling among them—or if he really did dream it all. The device, of course, suggest a more tangible explanation. It’s not unreasonable to think it’s somehow related to the whole mess, but it also seems to be, well, broken. Whatever happened when Loki got shot also put a large crack in the face of it, and he hasn’t been able to get it to turn on or do anything. The strap had also snapped when he pulled it off of Richards’ wrist (did he really? he must have), but the idea of leaving it behind makes something crawl uncomfortably beneath his skin, so he loops what’s left of it onto a chain like a pendant and tucks it safely under his TVA-issued shirt.

The day goes about as well as it did before, which is to say, pretty terribly. Despite knowing it was going to happen, he still loses track of Mobius, and the knowledge of the outcome of that sends him into a panic that ends with some poor decisions and him staring down the barrel a truly monstrous gun.

It’s easier waking up the second time. Or is it third? His hand goes automatically to the device still hanging around his neck, but this time he also can’t help but wince at the phantom pain of the chest shot that took him out. He’s alive, there’s no hole blown in his ribcage, but the ghost of it lingers like an echo in his memory for a few minutes before it fades. B-15 frowns and tilts her head at him clutching his chest like he’s having a heart attack, but makes no comment beyond the words he’s already come to expect.

He doesn’t wait for her to finish before he takes off to find Mobius.

Normally they don’t meet up before the briefing, but this time Loki storms into the wing of the building reserved for the senior analysts’ apartments and pounds insistently on Mobius’s door until the man himself pulls it open. For a moment, Loki entirely forgets why he’s there, because Mobius is half dressed in slacks and a thin, sleeveless undershirt that clings to every curve of his torso and leaves precisely nothing to the imagination. He’s barefoot and his short hair is still tousled from bed, and the whole thing should not be as attractive as it works out to be. Even the annoyed purse of his lips is alluring. Fuck.

This is, sadly, not the first time Loki has found himself experiencing a tug of not-entirely-unexpected desire for the analyst. Look, he isn’t blind, anyone can see that Mobius is a handsome man, made even more intriguing by the interplay of the hard edges and soft spots of his character. How he won’t let Loki get away with anything while at same time giving in all the time to Loki’s little eccentricities. Loki’s never quite seen him like this, though, all enticingly sleep-rumpled, and it’s kind of a lot to deal with considering everything else going on. 

“Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to tell me what the devil couldn’t wait for another thirty minutes?” Mobius demands, frowning. It’s a fair question, because Loki is pretty sure he’s been staring for the last two minutes, which is precisely one minute and 59 seconds too long for such things.

Loki manages to blink himself back to reality and clears his throat, shoving whatever that is deep, deep down where he decidedly will not examine it any time in the next millennium. “What do you know about time loops?”

“Like in the time cells?” Mobius asks, his brow furrowing.

“No. Like, reliving the same day over and over again.”

Mobius shakes his head. “Not possible.”

“What do you mean ‘not possible’?” Loki asks.

“Not sure I can be any clearer,” Mobius huffs. “That kind of recursive loop in an active timeline is impossible. You could travel backwards a day I guess, but then there’d be two variants of you in the same timeline.”

This is pretty much what Loki had figured, given what he had learned about the multiverse, but it does nothing to help him figure out his particular problem. “So you’re not aware of any technology that would allow someone to completely reset the day after being killed and try it again in the same body, with all their memories from the previous day?”

“What?” Mobius says, clearly dumbfounded. “Of course not. A variant that dies—not pruned, but killed—is dead, Loki. There’s no coming back from that.”

Loki hesitates, but there’s no one else he can talk to about this. He reaches up to touch the device under his shirt absentmindedly, carefully choosing his next words. “What if there was?”

The problem is, Mobius is a stubborn man. He knows far more about how timelines work than Loki ever will, and he refuses to believe Loki experienced anything more than a very vivid dream. Timelines don’t work that way, he insists, and there’s no way to make them work that way. Even the broken device in Loki’s possession doesn’t sway him, probably because it’s, well, broken. Not terribly convincing, as it turns out.

Unexpectedly, Loki coming to talk to Mobius apparently perturbs the timeline enough that things seem to be going differently. It’s enough that even Loki starts to doubt himself, even though he already lived through this day twice before, even though he can vividly remember the pain of dying twice, even though he knows that he took the device directly from Richards’ wrist himself. Maybe it means that this time will go differently, though, that the future isn’t as written as it seems to be, that today won’t end with both of them dead.

But then, right before they depart through the time doors, Mobius says, “It’s gonna work this time, I can feel it.”

Shit.

“Mobius, listen to me,” Loki says urgently, grabbing him by the arm. “If this goes the way I think it will, it’s going to be a bloodbath.”

Mobius sighs, because they’ve been over this. “You can’t know what’s going to happen out there. We’re outside of time right now. No one can travel to a previous time point in the TVA.”

“But if I do know—”

“Then something very strange is going on, yes,” Mobius finished for him. He hesitates a moment, still frowning. “What do you think is going to happen?”

“Richards is dug in with an army of very well-armed men around him. What it takes to get to him…” Loki trails off and looks down at his hand, even though he knows he won’t find Mobius’s blood on it. He can still picture it, though, still almost feel its warmth. “Promise me you’ll stay near me,” he finally says as he meets Mobius’s gaze again. “That you won’t run off.”

“I don’t need a babysitter, Loki,” Mobius scoffs.

Loki’s hand shoots out to grab his wrist, fingers automatically shifting until he finds a pulse. “Please, Mobius,” he begs. “Promise.”

He doesn’t want to know what’s in his eyes that makes Mobius blink, looking slightly taken aback. “Ok,” he answers softly. “I promise.”

Later, Loki thinks back to this moment and can’t understand how it could be such a difficult promise to keep.

~~~~~

“It’s gonna work this time, I can feel it.”

“I wish I could share your optimism.”

~~~~~

“It’s gonna work this time, I can feel it.”

“I’ll wager you it won’t.”

~~~~~

“It’s gonna work this time, I can—”

“By the Norns, would you stop?” Loki snaps. “Nothing is going to change. I’ve been through this five times before, and nothing ever changes!”

Mobius stares at him, his mouth still hanging slightly open. “What do you mean you’ve been through it five times?”

“I’ve literally lived this day five times, Mobius,” Loki hisses, trying not to draw attention from the hunters nearby. “Every time, we fail. Every time, I die, and every time, I wake up again, here, at the beginning of the same day.”

“That’s—”

“Not possible, I am well aware. But it’s happening all the same.”

“Why didn’t you say anything before right now?”

Loki groans in frustration. “Because you never believe me. You say it’s impossible, that time doesn’t work that way—”

“Because it doesn’t,” Mobius cuts in.

“—and so nothing about the operation changes except for what I do. And it’s not enough,” Loki huffs. It’s never, ever enough. It took him four loops just to figure out why Mobius kept disappearing—an attack on the third sub-basement divides their meager forces in half, and somehow Mobius always ends up in the other group, forced to retreat down a hidden side passage—but he can’t do anything when the hunters and minutemen won’t listen to him.

“Huh,” Mobius says, looking oddly thoughtful. It’s certainly not the response Loki expected. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Mobius shrugs. “If this is really happening to you—not saying it is, but if—it sounds like you need to find a way to convince me earlier, so we can come up with a new plan.”

“I— what?” Loki boggles at him. “And how, pray tell, am I supposed to do that?”

“You’re a clever guy. I’m sure you’ll figure something out,” Mobius says with a grin as he claps Loki on the shoulder.

If only it was as reassuring as Mobius no doubt intends it to be.

~~~~~

“Loki, what—?” Mobius sputters when Loki pushes past him into his apartment the next loop.

He hasn’t come here every morning since the first time, mostly because trying to explain everything is already starting to get tiresome. Still, he’s become familiar enough with how things go.

“Watch the table,” he says offhandedly as he disappears into Mobius’s bedroom to retrieve a shirt, jacket and tie.

“Huh?” Mobius says, right as he shuffles into the coffee table and stubs his toe, then hobbles away swearing.

“That’ll be the coffee,” Loki continues when he reemerges, moments before a beep sounds in the kitchen. He shoves the clothes at a bewildered Mobius and heads in to retrieve the mug from under the coffee maker and grab the cream from the fridge. Mobius appears in the doorway—Loki knows without checking—and leans against the frame as he buttons his shirt. “Stop frowning, I know how you take it.”

“You’re not even looking at me.”

“Don’t have to,” Loki replies without turning around. “You’re going to ask how I can be sure you still take your coffee the same as the Mobius I knew before, to which I will respond that, even though you do, it doesn’t matter because I’m well aware of how you take it, and then you’ll insist that I’ve never seen you prepare it, which was true before today, but no longer. I think that about catches us up, don’t you?”

Mobius is, predictably, gaping at him when he finally turns, and Loki can’t resist the pleased smirk that tugs on his lips. Perhaps he should have tried this earlier, but then again, he needed a few repetitions to be completely sure of how the morning would go. He walks over and hands Mobius the coffee mug, which the other man takes automatically, then tugs at the ends of the tie looped under his collar and begins to tie it while Mobius is still seemingly stuck staring at him.

A moment later, Mobius appears to come back to himself, and he swallows. “W-what are you doing?” he asks, his voice oddly tight.

“Plenty to do this morning,” Loki replies lightly, letting his lips tip into a smirk. “I’m afraid we can’t afford to dawdle.”

“And how did you know all that other stuff?”

“Easy,” Loki says as he finishes tying the tie and gives it a little pat before stepping back. “I’ve lived this day before. And before you protest that it’s impossible, know that I’ve had this conversation with you five times before and am very familiar with every possible argument about how the timelines do or do not work.”

“That’s…” Mobius begins, trailing off for a long moment as his eyes search Loki’s face. Loki readies himself for the inevitable impossible, despite his warning, but instead Mobius finishes, “amazing.”

Loki cocks a skeptical eyebrow at him. “Really?”

“I mean, you’re right, it should be impossible, but… I dunno, Loki. There’s something about you that feels different. Can’t put my finger on it.”

“Huh,” Loki huffs, frowning. He hadn’t considered the possibility that the looping might change him in some way, although now that he thinks about it, he supposes it’s inevitable. He’s living out days and remembering them, moving forward in his life, even if no one else is.

“When you say you’ve been reliving, you mean the day resets when you go to sleep?” Mobius asks.

“When I die,” Loki answers bluntly, and Mobius’s eyes go wide. “So far I haven’t lasted long enough to go to sleep.”

Mobius swallows hard again. “I think I need to sit down.”

Without really thinking about it, Loki takes ahold of Mobius’s elbow and steers him back into the living room. They both sit on the couch, close enough that their knees knock together when Loki turns slightly toward him, and he doesn’t let himself contemplate the fact that he feels better when they’re some kind of in contact. That there’s a strange kind of reassurance in the solidity of Mobius’s body next to him. Each time he wakes up everything feels a little more unreal, but this helps. Even if he has to force himself not to reach out and press his fingers to the pulse point on Mobius’s wrist.

Loki explains how the day goes as quickly as he can—what goes wrong on the operation, and how he thinks they might do better—and Mobius just listens, taking long sips from his coffee at regular intervals. The biggest issues is the weapons, but Mobius still resists him on that point; the minutemen are good in hand-to-hand combat but haven’t been trained with firearms, and with only an hour before the operation is scheduled to depart, there’s little time to change that. Loki already guesses that pushing back the operation is probably a long shot. He might be able to convince Mobius, but the TVA here isn’t run by one person, there’s a team making the decisions, and there’s no way they’ll listen to him. Loki and Mobius talk about different strategies until they can’t put off joining the rest any longer, and he can’t help but feel a little hopeful as they gear up. Things will be different this time.

Too late, he realizes that he sounds just like—

“It’s gonna work this time, I can feel it.”

Loki scrubs a palm down his face and sends a little prayer to the Norns that when dies this time, it might be quick.

~~~~~

Don’t get him wrong, dying sucks. Most of the time whatever wound he gets isn’t enough to kill him instantly. Once he drowns in his own blood, and he thinks nothing could be worse until he’s slowly crushed under rubble after an explosion. But none of it, he thinks, is as bad as watching Mobius die over and over again. Every one of those deaths is indelibly etched in his memory, along with every time Mobius calls him a good man right before the end.

If he was good, he’d be able to get them out of this mess. If he was good, he’d be able to protect his— his— friends. Loki is well aware that he’s started giving up, letting himself be killed, when Mobius dies—maybe he has been from the beginning—but no, he would not like to examine that too closely, thank you.

Once, after a particularly brutal loop, Loki barely waits for Mobius to open the door before surging forward and enveloping him in a crushing hug.

“Loki, what—?” Mobius huffs, but he also hugs him back immediately, and something unknots in Loki’s chest at the feeling of Mobius’s broad hand rubbing reassuring circles between his shoulder blades.

Loki tucks his face against Mobius’s neck, which is probably too intimate a position for what they are to each other, but he can feel his pulse throbbing there, steady and real, and he doesn’t really care. “If I told you not to go on the mission today, would you listen?” he asks, his voice muffled. 

“You know I couldn’t,” Mobius murmurs, and Loki knows, he knows he’ll never convince Mobius to stay behind, but he doesn’t know how much more he can take of this. Mobius holds Loki a minute longer before he pulls back slightly. “Now what’s this all about?”

Even with Mobius’s help in planning, they can’t seem to break through Richards’ defenses. Every time they think they’ve cracked the pattern, that they’ve anticipated every attack, another one pops up that they never foresaw just because they’d never gotten that far before. Richards is simply too dug in; they’d need to go back further than a single day to really catch him unawares, and that’s just not possible.

“What if you just took two of the best hunters, say B-15 and D-90—”

“Not D-90,” Loki interrupts, wrinkling his nose.

“—Fine,” Mobius sighs, “G-35, then, like a targeted strike team. You could slip past a lot of these obstacles, and the rest of us could draw their attention away.”

It’s basically what he did the very first time through, when he actually made it to Richards’ inner sanctum, which is why Loki knows it would work. But that doesn’t mean it would be successful. He shakes his head. “No, I can’t do that.”

“What do you mean? It doesn’t work?”

Loki stares at the man across from him, blue eyes unflinchingly holding his gaze. It should be easy to lie to him, Loki is the prince of lies, but when he opens his mouth what comes out is a strained, “I can get to him. I still died.”

“But if you can talk to him—”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“How many times have you tried?” Mobius demands, frowning like he knows exactly what Loki is holding out on him.

“It doesn’t matter,” Loki repeats insistently.

“Loki.”

“Once, ok?!” Loki snaps, leaping to his feet. He strides off across the modest living room until he can go no further, then slumps onto one hand against a bookshelf and stares at the ground as he quietly adds, “The very first time.”

Mobius, of course, is not about to let this go. Out of the corner of his eye, Loki sees him stand. “Well, why haven’t you tried again?”

“It’s not—” Loki starts, then breaks off with a sigh. “The costs are too high.”

“You can’t possibly know what will happen to the team that gets left behind,” Mobius argues. “Maybe it’s not so bad.”

Loki groans in frustration as he finally looks up again, folding his arms across his chest. “I know you died the first time, Mobius.”

“But you can’t be sure it’ll happen again.”

“I can’t be sure it won’t.”

“So?” Mobius challenges, a determined fire glinting in his eye. “Maybe it’s worth the risk, if it means getting Richards. If it means getting you out of this loop.”

“It’s not,” Loki insists stubbornly.

“Maybe it is for me. Did you ever think to ask?”

“I don’t care, because it’s not worth it to me.”

“It’s my life, Loki! I can’t see why it matters whether the risk is worth it to you!”

“Because I can’t lose you again, Mobius!” Loki nearly shouts, finally pushed to the breaking point.

The apartment is deathly silent for several long minutes after that, and Loki squeezes his eyes closed. There it is, then. The truth he’d been trying to hide even from himself. Maybe he’d been in love with Mobius even before the reset, or maybe he hadn’t been, but it doesn’t matter now. Spending as many loops as he had with him—working with him, joking with him, being with him—had done the necessary damage. And to make matters worse, Mobius remembers none of it. Loki is barely better than a stranger to him.

“You can’t… you don’t mean me…” Mobius finally says, much closer than he’d been before, and when Loki opens his eyes he finds him standing right in front of him. Staring up at him with an expression full of confusion and trepidation.

“Yes, I mean you,” Loki sighs. “Not some other you who doesn’t even exist, or the person you were before, because there’s no difference. I’ve been doing this for more than a month, Mobius. There’s only you.” He turns away again, then, because he can’t bear to see whatever pity or disbelief might be wrought on Mobius’s face. This isn’t the point, anyway, they’re wasting time they don’t have when they should be focused on the operation. “There has to be another way. Something we’re not seeing—”

A hand on his arm stops him. “Loki, look at me,” Mobius says softly. He tugs gently, pulling Loki around to face him again, and before Loki really understands what’s happening he’s stretching up and pressing their lips together. It’s not much, just a chaste brush, but it sends little zips of electricity sizzling along Loki’s skin.

“What— what was that for?” he manages after Mobius pulls back, unable to make sense of what’s happening. It shouldn’t be possible, that Mobius would be the one kissing him.

“Thought it’d be obvious,” Mobius answers with one-shouldered shrug and a lopsided half-smile. Tentative. Hopeful.

“But— you barely know me.”

“It doesn’t feel that way.”

Loki blinks at him. “It doesn’t?”

“Nope,” Mobius says easily, like that makes any sense at all.

Could it possibly mean that everything—all the memories, all the loops—are still inside him somewhere? And if they are, could that mean—

Mobius interrupts his snowballing thoughts by reaching up and thumbing across the arc of his cheekbone before pushing a lock of hair behind his ear. “Can I?” he murmurs.

Loki’s not even entirely sure what he’s asking, but he doesn’t care. He nods, and Mobius pulls him down into another kiss, one that lacks all the hesitation of the first. Their lips move together, pushing further and further until Mobius’s tongue licks at the seam of his lips. Loki opens up readily, letting their tongues tangle together in an intoxicating give and take. One of Loki’s hands curls around his waist, drawing him closer, as the other slides up behind his head, digging into the short hair at the nape of his neck. They kiss for minutes, for hours (who knows in this place), unhurried, as if they have all the time in the multiverse. When they do finally pull apart, Mobius stares up at him with such wonder on his face that Loki is quite unhelpfully slammed back to the reality of their circumstances.

“What’s wrong?” Mobius asks at the distress that must be written on his face. Loki lets the tips of his fingers skim lightly along the edge of Mobius’s jaw. “You’re not going to remember any of this.”

“I dunno. Seems like the kind of thing that might stick.”

Loki sighs. “That’s not how it works, Mobius.”

“You don’t know how it works,” Mobius counters. “And who knows, maybe this time we’ll be successful. No more loops.”

“I wish I could believe that’s possible.”

They’re still no closer to a plan that works, one that ends with them getting Richards and surviving at the same time, and while this morning has taken a rather unexpectedly delightful turn, it’s sadly not going to help all that much.

He’ll try, though. Norns know he’ll try like Hel.

#lokius #loki x mobius #loki laufeyson #mobius m. mobius #loki tv #loki series #loki fanfic #lokius fanfic #lokius fic #my fic #whumptober2022

[lipglossanon]

Hey Spooks!

I’ve been meaning to write a more meaningful review of the 12 days of smutmas and to welcome you back but, I haven’t had the energy to do so. I’m sorry!

But welcome back! I hope you and Rex feel so very proud of yourselves as each fic was just amazing and you both hit it out of the park!! (My absolute faves being psychologist Leon and Vampire Leon respectively 😚) And I hope you’re having fun being back <3 I’ve really loved your fics you’ve put out too!

Also… I’m sorry about the fact that you were harassed out of your safe space to have fun all because you wrote something others didn’t like. That’s not fair, and it’s not fun :( I hope that you find another, more mature space, even if it’s not in Resident Evil and that you continue to have fun, just like you did during the summer.

you don’t have to post this if you don’t want to, but I just wanted to say hello!

🪶 anon

Hiya 🪶 anon!! 👋

And I don’t mind to post (so I can reply!). But if you’d like it removed please let me know 👍

And don’t apologize! I’m just happy to know that you really liked our smutmas collab! 🥰 we had a lot of fun and back and forth all throughout it. Rex is a fantastic writer (and I loved shrink Leon too 😉). Ahh 🙈 vampire Leon was so fun!! I was going to add more but I felt good at where it ended lol

And I am having fun being back!! I honestly think purging my blog and blocking a lot before my break has made for my return being so nice 😌 my inbox is empty of hate and only full of you awesome anons!!! 💜

And for now I’ll still be kicking around the RE space. I’m not having some doofuses try and run me out of a franchise that I’ve been involved with longer than they’ve been alive lmao. But thank you!! That’s a really sweet sentiment. 🥹

I hope you’re doing well!! 💜 💜

#ask box #🪶 anon #lipglossanon #lipglossanswers

[gaywiththesauce]

Hi hello sorry it’s not Wednesday anymore BUT. I remember you saying at one point that you were listening to your Giyuu playlist? (am I remembering right?) and I’m. so unbelievably normal and was wondering what your top 5 songs you associate with Giyuu are. Or top 10. Or top one million. Ok thank you sorry goodbye again_(:3 」∠)_

Hi Rose👋!! welcome back to my dropbox lmao

okok so so I don't remember saying that but it's totally possible that I did. I think about blorbo a lot so I think I mentioned it

These won't be very descriptive because many of the songs are just related to emotions or specific scenarios so you'll have my 4am ramblings. lil warning, I'm a swiftie, but I have a variety of other different music tastes too. here's my top 20ish because I'm obsessed with my blorbo Giyuu Tomioka the Queen

Telephones by Vacations - "my thoughts are crawling, you're all I see" "wherever I go, you'll always be next to me" has massive brain rot energy :) he only sees his love(s) everywhere

Verbatim by Mother Mother - I kinda perceive Giyuu as someone that doesn't conform to gender norms (totally not projecting) but he would totally be unapologetic for his expression. maybe a lil oblivious but not sorry

First Love/Late Spring by Mitski - the lyrics speak for themselves of anxiety that he can't love anyone else because he's too scared to lose them. "please, hurry, leave me, I can't breathe. please don't say you love me."

Long Live (TV) by Taylor Swift - this song is specifically for my fantasy prince/knight au I made and fully fleshed out with Minecraft building and shit. the idea of happy fluffy marriage makes me giggle

Gilded Lily by Cults - self explanatory. sad song. "haven't I given enough?" "always the fool with the slowest heart" (help please he has the slowest heart because his way of communicating isn't verbal and only a very select few understand-)

Daylight by Taylor Swift - "I once believed love would be burning red, but it's golden, like daylight" kyogiyuu energy, first impression of Kyojuro's "burning red" but it turns out he's a soft "golden"

Screaming by CHVRCHES - beautiful song. it talks about the past and how time has been stolen. not knowing what side of the coin you're on and if it's wrong or not. good vibes song to look out the window to

New Year's Day by Taylor Swift - SUCH A GOOD MESSAGE SONG! it's all about the tranquility that comes with love and life, how the couple would be there for not just the fun moments but the calm or hard or maybe boring moments. also "please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere"

Money by The Drums - Giyuu would totally want to give back to the world he believes he's stolen from (he's still alive, which is something that he stole from others-) but he has nothing else to give other than hard training and killing demons, saving people when he can

Open Your Eyes by Snow Patrol - this one I can't really explain. the build up and release just kinda speaks for itself. it's cathartic and makes you want to jump up and down and rip an air guitar

Don't Let Go by The Ghost Club - "I'm falling off the edge but you never ever let go" another relationship one! who woulda guessed? again, love that lasts because love is not all sunshine. it rains and pours and you have to get an umbrella. very fun to listen to!

The Mute by Radical Face - this was shown to me by a beautiful moot when my one ficlet reminded them of it. it makes sense! "if you only listen with your ears, you can't get in [my head]" (your fic today reminded me of this song too and i listened to it again after reading tehe)

Nightmares by CHVRCHES - "Another poem designed for revenge. Now I'm living a nightmare again, and it won't end.

Black Out Days by Phantogram - gives me remembering Sabito vibes. So painfully thinking of him but trying to forget him and keep that part of his mind away from now but it doesn't want to stay away. He isolates himself from his memories that he "[doesn't] even recognize [Sabito's] face"

I miss you, I'm sorry by Gracie Adams - it's less of the lyrics and more the vibes. i just kinda really like this song. "I still love you, I promise" to Sabito---

Become the Warm Jets by Current Joys - listen listen ok hear me out: slow song, sad voice, sad song, Giyuu-themed? totally feel canon with "All my life is just something I can't ignore."

A Soulmate Who Wasn't Meant to Be by Jess Benko - wow. sad angst sad song about regret because wow. just angst.

Young by Vacations - dissociation central. not knowing how things are moving and wanting things to be right and okay. that childhood innocence of want everything (read: Sabito) to be his

i love you by Billie Eilish - Giyuu being in denial of everything. How could Kyojuro say that he loves him? How could he open up so easily to Kyo? "the smile that you gave me even when you felt like dying" FFUCCK

Dress by Taylor Swift - this is that song when the pairing finally gets together after a 20K slow burn. smiles. "Carve your name into my bedpost 'cause I don't want you like a best friend."

A Love Song by Ladyhawke - happy upbeat love song. Imagine running through a crowd, holding hands, laughing and giggling as Kyo pulls Giyuu along to show him something he's excited about

I didn't mean for this to be this long (this was originally 10) but now you have 2/3 of my Giyuu playlist! I accidentally deleted my Giyuu playlist like four months ago so I'm building from the ground up unfortunately😭

I hope this satisfies your curiosity! Enjoy listening if you do!

#can you notice the point where i start mindlessly rambling? can you tell? #im so tired i have class in the morning but my mind said “we're talking about Giyuu☺️☺️!” #so have 21 songs #giyuu tomioka #my Giyuu playlist is like 30ish songs but my master is over 500 #number 17 totally totally isnt the name of a fic choice on the poll i made #this was fun #i have another ask that i meed to answer and it contains a special surprise aka writing content for something i never expected to escale #saucy speaks #time for bed #maybe ill share my spotify one day #they have funny names #rose thank you for letting me talk about blorbo i appreciate seeing you in my asks #you get 4 cookies #what am i doing #i have class in the morning💀 #playlist #spotify #saucy samples

[heartofarcanum]

Hello!

Thanks so much for your guide to wlw romance options in romance club 🌈

Who are your LIs in all the currently running/unfinished (POV & LOS I see you & I miss you) stories (or finished if you prefer)

Have a nice day/night 👋

I’m so glad you liked it! I should probably do an updated version, tbh. It’s been a while and there’s a bunch of new books.

Also dear POV/LOS, I see u and I miss u

Anyway here are my current LIs!

Arcanum: Rob, love of my actual life 😍

VFV: undecided (but let’s be honest, it’s gonna be Alexandre)

The One: Adira/Kelsie/Thiago/Evan, aka tbd

Theodora: Lawrence/Antonio

KCD: Killian my love 🥰

GC: still undecided between Stortia, Augusta, and Labelle tbh 😅

Heart of Trespia: Wyatt, but I am replaying for Gisella as soon as physically possible

Dracula: Vlad (but I’m a Vlad/Leo/Laia ot3 truther, and also Sandra is the hottest woman alive, so)

SOL: Sherlock/Leslie/Gray, but my locked in LI is Sherlock

Tiamat: Kingu or Niall, time will tell

LOS: I played Todd first and am currently replaying for Ursula, I haven’t decided between them yet

POV: Thor 🌩

Thank you for the ask anon! Have a nice day/night 😘

#anon #ask #romance club #rc

[yeastinfectionvale]

Hiya adora 👋👋

It's me it's me..... date anon

So I thought about a few things and I really like really want to be called in the story ofcourse Circe cause of yk the Greek goddes she was my favourite and I'm in love with the Madeline miller novel. Also then you should have a name also. And and can we please have a Sapphic romance , I'm just dying to read about two girls falling in love. Okay after thousands of my requests which I'll love you forever and pledge my future kids to you like in rapunzel (the folklore version) if you accept them. Babes ive had so much things to say also quite unfortunate that I didn't come back to some mild altering statement again although I do have so much fun scrolling through your blog and catching up on all the aus. Babes I'm in love.

.............

Its been a few weeks before we see each other and during all those weeks everywhere I go , I try to look for your face in my surroundings. I text you alot but I'm scared that I'm playing my cards too early but as soon as the ding for a message come through all my worries are lost and all I want to know is what you have to say. I hang on to every word and store them in my mind like it's the last thing I'll ever hear. I walk around with a permanent smile on my face and in my head i say that I want people to take a look inside my heart cause it's beating wildly and it's alive and its screaming look she chose us look she likes us. You tell me about you work and all the drama around I tell you about my uni and how exams are coming up and I neglect to tell you that i can't concentrate on anything because it feels like every breath I'm taking is just the next breath till I get to see you. I want to see you and kiss you on the cheek and take your hand and run through the rainy weather because we both forgot our umbrellas. I want to sit and watch horror movies with you because I say I'm not scared but I just want and excuse to latch on to you andbto hold your hand and finally i just eant to be near you cause I feel like you're the sun and what is the moon without the suns light. Goodness sake i jsut want to be next to you . We try to make plans but you have work and I studying and I'm internally dying because I miss hearing your laugh in person I missed seeing your eyes twinkle . I miss all your hand gestures and how passionate you are about things. I want to invite you out but my mother's birthday is coming up and she's invited me however she wants me to bring a plus one and I don't have the nerve to ask you ir take you with me because I don't know what we are and i don't know if I uave the right yet. Although I would really love it if you were there with me but simultaneously I'm also scared of taking you because how am i meant to answer my parents when they ask what are you to me ? How do I give them an answer when I'm not sure of their reaction how can i make you feel as if I want to hide you but still I gather the courage and finally text you

Would you like to come with me ?

Babes see you next time. I really really enjoy doing this and I did look more into iconography its really fuckin cool oh my god !!

Also f1 is back so yayy for us also did you watch one day ??

<3🫂🫂🫂

Hello Date anon!!! I hope your uni is going well!

Your other ask got eaten unfortunately, but I remember what you wrote so yippee. Vale's stupid laying down smugcat picture has enchanted me and I fear it may be a permanent fixture of my blog now. If you think Circe is a bit old Timey, why don't we go for a name similar to it. Maybe one from the odyssey or as Circe means Bird in Greek, a bird-themed name like Paloma?

I'm so happy f1 is back and no I haven't watched one day just because I promised my sister I would but my mum ended up accidentally spoiling the end so I'm probably going to only watch the happy parts.

Okay back to the fun bit, a dual author sapphic romance, made via Tumblr asks.

We keep in contact, each message of yours distracted me from work. Maybe giving you a specific ringtone wasn't the smartest idea. But I didn't want to miss a text. My co-workers have begun to catch on that something is up, and they prod for more answers but I give them a smile, keeping you close to my heart. I've been caught many times during meeting smiling at my phone but my manager says nothing as my work is on time and she is invested in whatever is going on. I have a goofy smile on more and my mother has started to catch on, questioning me in the kitchen whenever she can catch me. She wants to meet the woman who has her daughter daydreaming. But I pat her on the arm, reminding her that we've just met and I don't want to scare you away.

We talk about work and I tell you about the new girl in product design, conveniently leaving out all the times she caught me biting my lip while messaging you. You tell me about your uni work and I laugh, remembering how I had nearly missed my last assignment, too busy daydreaming about you. I go to cafes under the guise of studying but I end up texting you. Or my friends who both are tired of me not asking you out properly and excited for the two of us. They tease me relentlessly but I joke about how at least I've got you on my arm. My friends remind me that we haven't seen each other for a while in person and my mood sours slightly.

We go out more cute dates that we don't call dates. More hand holding and stupid pickup lines that I googled the night before. More days spent thinking about what I should have done different when with you and more days spent with my friends telling me I should have made a move. I come more soaked on more than one occasion, my mother confused as I never leave the house without an proper raincoat. But if I have a raincoat how are we supposed to share an umbrella? How could I come so close to you without making things awkward.

The weather takes a turn for the worse, so we move to staying in. Whenever we turn a scary movie on, I thank mother nature for being so extreme. I laugh at the jumpscares, my heart threatening to leap out my chest as you hold onto me. You assume I'm scared of the movie and I nod along dumbly, your hair under my nose as I wrap my arms around you. I thank everyone and anyone who made it possible for us to be so close. I keep sneaking glances at your face when your distracted and I have to fight the urge to lean in and kiss whatever part of you I can.

You mention your mother's birthday and how you need a plus one. My heart leaps into my throat, who is this other person you could ask. You ask if I want to come with you and I have to stop myself from sounding too enthusiastic. We agree the time, date and location before you leave. Normally whenever you leave I end up stomping to my room, hiding under blankets. But not tonight. I rush to my mother, quickly telling her the news as she gives me a hug. I rush upstairs, texting the group chat as they start planning how I could impress your family.

I fall asleep after messaging you again, my phone in hand and a website about the flower language open.

#asks??? in this economy??? #Date anon!!! #Circe tag