#i also need to work on finals and this project that i have going

[storytowrite]

|The FINE Art ~ Hwang Hyunjin|

Theme: Art Student! Hyunjin x Y/N

Warnings: mention of nudity, smut, 18+, unprotected sex, the age gap Y/N is 15 years older than Hyunjin.

Word Count: 5257

Summary: Life wasn’t easy for you. You lost your job, lost your husband who remarried and took everything away leaving you only with an old, sick cat. You desperately needed money. Thankfully, your friend is an art teacher and your body is quite tempting. Especially for the young, talented student.

------------------

“I’m sorry ma’am, but the cat needs surgery if you want it to live longer. We cannot wait long.” The vet said his verdict. Your old cat, Lemon, was ill, and you knew that. The thing was that you didn’t have enough money and you were in a really bad situation. 

“How much is for the surgery?” You asked. 

“It will cost about $3000 in total with all the care.” The vet answered your question and you sighed heavily. Why on Earth does it cost so much?! And more importantly - how will you gather all the money needed? 

“All right… If that’ll help him, please do everything you can. I can’t lose him too.” You said tiredly. 

“We’ll do everything we can to save this little boy.” The vet smiled at you honestly. 

You nodded and left your cat at the vet’s clinic. It wasn’t a good timing for such expenses, but you had to do everything you could to just save your animal. You sighed heavily once again. The previous week was hard and now this. Your life was a mess. You lost the job, since your boss decided to hire “some younger girls” and you were simply too old in his eyes. 

The divorce process was finally over. But unfortunately your ex-husband took everything he could, including your apartment. Because of this, you had to move in with your friend, at least until you get back on your feet again. Fortunately, Lina was happy to help you. 

You returned home wasted and without your cat, which you left at the veterinary clinic. You wanted to cry. Earning $3,000 in a short time seemed unrealistic. Well, because how to do it? 

"Oh Y/N are you back already?" Asked Lina peering at you from above another artwork she was working on. "Everything ok baby?" 

"No, nothing is ok. Lemon needs surgery and I don't have that much money to pay for it. And I still can't find a job. Everything is falling apart for me." You sat down heavily on the couch. "And I also need to find an apartment and..." 

"Woah, slow down honey. I don't mind your company. You and Lemon can stay with me as long as you need, after all, you know that.... And as for work, I think I have an idea." She smiled slightly at you. You knew that kind of smile from Lina's genre of brilliant ideas. 

"Oh no, why do I feel like I'm going to regret this?" You asked, looking at your friend. 

"Don't exaggerate, it's nothing like that.... Besides, we'll both benefit from it." 

"Fine, what's the idea?" You asked, slightly curious. 

"Great... you'll love it!" She clapped her hands. 

After an hour of talking to your friend and her persuading you, you finally agreed to help her with her little project. Lina was a drawing teacher in the art department, and her students were just starting to learn how to sketch real people. They needed a model for this, since the topic was THE FEMALE BODY. 

At first you had a lot of concerns. Lina wanted you to pose nude in front of a group of some of her top students. You had huge objections to this. You didn't feel like showing your body to strangers in their twenties. But you had no choice. The deal was simple, 10 sessions at $300 each, for a maximum of five hours per class. That is, two weeks of work. You were able to do it, right? 

"I don't know Lina, I have to think about it..." You said, glancing at her. 

"Just don't make me wait too long for your answer.... Besides, you have a beautiful body for our age, so what's the problem?" She asked lightly. 

"What do you mean what's the problem? I'm supposed to show off to a group of 20-year-olds? After all, they are children!" 

"Honey, these are young adults. Besides, they are just a few people. I'd rather pay you than some strangers. Think of Lemon. He needs this operation.... And if you prove yourself, who knows? Maybe I'll hire you permanently?" She persuaded you further. 

" Oh, hell no... I'll find a job, eventually." You replied quickly. "But fine. I'll take part in it..." You agreed, sighing heavily. "Just so I don't regret it..." 

"Believe me, you won't and you'll even like it!" She replied excitedly. "We'll start first thing tomorrow morning! Prepare yourself properly, you know, shave and.... " 

"Okay, I'll prepare properly.... Anything else?" You asked in a tired voice, interrupting her sentence. 

"Hm... take some clothes to change into.... And well, put on some nice underwear. Tomorrow we start with the upper body. The students will sketch your torso and breasts above all. Well, and tie your hair in a ponytail, it will be easier to see your collarbones.... But that's at ease, I'll tell you everything exactly tomorrow." She grinned. "Go rest, I still have to finish here." 

You sighed heavily and went straight to the bathroom, following your friend's directions. You still weren't convinced about the idea, but the situation forced you to do so. You felt stress above all. You may have had a nice, fit body, but you certainly weren't used to showing it to strangers. 

After a long and warm shower, you headed to your bedroom, where you fell asleep rather quickly. The next day would be a very long one... 

The next day you got up early, got dressed and did light makeup. You left your hair loose, for now at least. Later you'll tie it up in a ponytail. Your friend had already been bustling around in the kitchen since morning. 

"Good morning! Ready for today's challenges?" Asked a delighted Lina. 

"Mhm, I won't be any more than I am." You muttered uneasily. 

"Oh grumpy... Come on, or we'll be late." Lina didn't seem to mind your dissatisfaction. 

"And breakfast?" You asked. 

"We don't have time... you'll get something on the spot." Your friend waved her hand and pulled you with her to the exit. You left her apartment and headed for the car. The trip to the university didn't take long, but you were getting more and more stressed with each passing moment. No wonder, after all, you will be posing naked.... 

You entered the university and headed straight to the room where the classes would be held. Lina showed you everything inside and once again reminded you what to do and how to do it. Your task was quite simple. All you had to do was show some breasts and sit still on a stool for a good couple of hours. 

The students began to fill the room, and you heard Lina greeting them cheerfully. You sighed quietly. It's going to be a long couple of hours. 

"Dear students, I have a little surprise for you today." You heard your friend's words. "A good friend of mine has agreed to get herself acquainted with us. As I said, you will learn sketching on a living organism.... Y/N come join us and show yourself to our students." 

You took a deeper breath and stepped out from behind the screen. You stressed all over. You stood in the middle, right next to your friend, trying not to catch eye contact with any of the students in the room. 

You quickly swept your eyes around the room. There were eight students in the classroom, three girls and five boys. They looked rather uninterested. You glanced out of the corner of your eye at Lina, who continued her argument. 

"Y/N will be our model today. Please be nice to her, she has never done this before. Today we'll take care of the upper body. Your task is to reproduce Y/N's torso and breasts. We sketch from the neck until we reach this point." Lina showed them exactly how much to sketch. "Y/N honey, take off your top and bra and sit on the stool. Do any of you have any questions?" 

The students did not answer Lina's question. You, on the other hand, with slightly trembling hands, undressed from the waist up and sat on the stool. Your friend even gave you a pillow to make you more comfortable. 

"Great, push your breasts out a little more and..." Lina began to correct your positioning. "Perfect! Okay darlings, you can begin." 

The group of students got down to sketching. You swept your eyes around the room. Everyone was focused to make the best possible representation of your body. Lina walked among the students and glanced at their progress. 

Time passed quickly. The students worked in silence. None of them had spoken a word since they entered the room. They were focused on the task at hand. 

One of the men present in the room caught your attention. You had never seen such a handsome man before. He had noble features, his hair was slightly longer and black. He had an earring under his eyebrow, and a black leather jacket perfectly framed his body. 

You swallowed your saliva. The man looked like a prince, and there was plenty of finesse and elegance in his movements. You honestly couldn't take your eyes off him. There was something about him that attracted you to him, something magnetic that you could not describe in words. 

The man in question noticed your gaze. It was as if he sensed that you were looking at him. He raised his gaze slightly, looking deeply into your eyes, and gently raised his eyebrow. You felt a blush appear on your face and your throat suddenly became dry. A strange feeling welled up in your lower abdomen as he smiled slightly and winked at you. 

"All right my dears. Let's take a break for a while." Lina suddenly announced, breaking the silence that had prevailed. "Let's let Y/N stretch her legs.... Come back here in 15 minutes and we'll continue." 

The students put down their sketches and began to leave the room for the break, and Lina handed you a sweatshirt to cover yourself. She smiled warmly at you in the process. 

"Well? Not so bad, huh?" She asked. 

"It's fine... Although I was stressed." You replied and took a sip of water. "Your students aren't very talkative, are they?" 

"As artists are." 

"I thought there would be more students in the room." You said, sipping water again. 

"Nah, I have a small group. But they are the best of the best.... You could say it's such a VIP class." Lina laughed. "You know, it's an extra class for the more ambitious ones." 

"Oh, now I understand..." You nodded, and your thoughts fled to the mysterious boy with an earring under his eyebrow. 

"Would you like to take a peek at the sketches? The students really sketched your body very well..." Lina took one sketchbook in her hand, belonging to the boy you were looking at. "Oh look, Hyunjin did it the best. That boy can perfectly render every detail.... He's my top-of-the-class student." She smiled proudly. So the boy's name was Hyunjin. 

"Wow... This is amazing." You said, sincerely impressed by the way Hyunjin rendered all the details. He even sketched the delicate birthmark you had under your breast. 

"Right?" Lina asked. "If you ask Hyunjin nicely, he might give you his sketch..." She winked. "He has a real talent, and by the way he looks like Aphrodite herself conceived him. He could be a model, but there's a rule at the university that students can't pose, which is a shame..." She sighed quietly. "I myself sometimes wish I could see..." 

"Lina! This is your student..." reprimanded your friend. 

"I know, that's why I leave some things only in dreams." She laughed quietly. "Hungry? I'll get you something to eat." As she said, so she did, quickly leaving the room.

You sighed softly and your stomach growled. Not eating breakfast before leaving was a mistake. You glanced at your watch. The break was slowly coming to an end and your friend had not yet returned with the promised food. In turn, students slowly began to return to the room.

"Hungry?" You suddenly heard a voice behind you. You turned to look at the owner. In front of you stood Hyunjin, who was a head taller than you. He smiled slightly and handed you a banana. "Eat... you've got another 2.5 hours of sitting ahead of you."

“T-Thank you…” You said, taking the banana from him and peeling it right away.

"You welcome... I wanted to say that you have really beautiful breasts." He said, looking you straight in the eye. "I can't wait for the next few days to see the rest."

"Oh thank you?" You replied slightly confused and blushed slightly.

"Nothing." Hyunjin winked at you. 

"Okay, guys! We can get back to work!" Lina called as she entered the room. "Y/N, please sit down the same way you sat before. Perfect! Remember, there are 2.5 hours left until the end of time. At the end of the day, you should have at least five sketches."

Everyone went back to work. The banana Hyunjin gave you, calmed your stomach for a while. You sighed quietly, sitting half-naked on the stool. Honestly, you were counting down the minutes until the end. 

Every now and then you found yourself staring at Hyunjin, who was working intently on the sketches of your body. You couldn't take your eyes off him. He was too handsome to resist. You didn't even feel that time had passed quickly. 

Lina announced the end of class and let you get dressed. Students slowly began to file out of the room. You watched them leave, saying a quiet 'goodbye'. Your friend approached you after everyone else had left the room."You were great today." She grinned. 

"I'm taking you to dinner, come on! And mentally prepare for tomorrow. We'll show them a little more... Can you handle it?"

"Yes, I think I can... Although I don't know if I want to show them everything." You started.

"Well, tomorrow's plan is legs... you can have a thong, we'll move on to the private parts at the end of the week, and next week we'll have poses... Well, I think you should be able to handle everything easily." Lina continued.

“Mhm, if you say so…” You muttered. The prospect of showing your private parts to students didn't make you feel optimistic, but when you thought about Hyunjin, it didn't sound so bad either...

—-------------------

The week flew by very quickly. The students tried to accurately portray all the details of your body on paper. On Friday, the last day of the first week, there was a class on sketching 'private body parts', as Lina called it. And that meant you had to show your vagina. 

The thought of this did not fill you with any optimism at all. You didn't want to expose yourself so much in front of the students, but Lina forced it on you. To be fair, she did suggest that she would pay you more for the day, so with a slight hesitation you agreed. 

You sat in the room wrapped only in a silk dressing gown and waited for the class to start. Your friend went to talk to the dean, leaving you alone. You sighed quietly and stuck your gaze into your phone, trying to calm your thoughts. 

Hyunjin entered the room, but you were so busy with your social media that you didn't notice his presence. The boy walked over to his stand and unpacked all the necessary items before turning towards you. 

"Hi pretty." He said in a velvety voice, snapping you out of your activity. "What are you going to show us today?" He asked and winked slightly. 

"Ekhm... Private parts." You replied feeling a little intimidated, looking up at him. 

"And you're convinced about that?" He asked. "You look confused and scared." 

"Well, it's certainly quite a step out of my comfort zone.... But I can't back down now." You answered honestly. 

"I understand... If it's any comfort to you, I'll try to replicate everything very accurately." He smiled.

"Thanks I guess..." She grunted. "I've seen your work before. You have great talent," he said. 

"Thank you, beautiful." He smiled warmly at you. "But the credit goes to the model I sketch." He winked, and a blush appeared on your cheeks. "It suits you this colour, you know? I wish I could paint a picture of you. In a red see-through nightgown.... What do you think?" 

"A painting?" You blinked, not expecting such a proposal. "I don't know..." 

"I have to create a portfolio for the final exam.... I've already painted three paintings of my friends, but I still have one left. And you are beautiful. I'll pay." He replied, watching your reaction. 

"I have to think about it..." You replied, but didn't finish the sentence because he walked in on you in mid-word. 

"I understand." He replied and wrote something down on a piece of paper. " Here, this is my phone number, if you make a decision, just text me..." He handed you a small piece of paper with the number on it. "Just don't make me wait too long for an answer, lovely." 

"R-right." You replied and hid his number in a safe place. 

The rest of the students entered the room, along with your friend, who smiled broadly at you. She welcomed the students and gave them the guidelines for the assignment. 

"Well Y/N. Sit with your hands behind your back and push your chest forward a little too. And spread your legs..." She said to you and helped you adjust your position. "My dears, you may begin. "

Sitting apart in front of a group of people has not been one of the most comfortable activities in your life. However, you didn't pay much attention to it yourself. Your thoughts were consumed with Hyunjin's proposal. Should you accept it? He said he would pay, and so far there was no indication that you would find a job.... 

You decided to give it a chance and agree to his proposal. After all, it's just another day's work as a "model." You survived a whole week in front of students, you'll survive being alone with Hyunjin too. 

Before you knew it, the class was over and the students had left the room, and you were free to get dressed. Lina was still talking to individuals while you typed Hyunjin's number into your phone. You made up your mind and as soon as he left the room, you texted him. 

[Y/N]

Ok. I agree.... When do you want to do it? ~ Y/N

[Hyunjin] 

Wonderful news sweetheart! Let's meet tomorrow evening at my place. Remember, red nightgown 😘

 He wrote back almost immediately. You swallowed your saliva. What are you actually doing? 

—-------------------

The next day you went to the address Hyunjin sent you in a text message. You were stressed. You didn't know what it should look like or how long it would take. Your body trembled and your mind wandered into dangerous territory. You felt both apprehension and excitement about the whole situation. 

You stood in front of the door of his apartment. You took a few deep breaths and knocked gently. You waited, listening for the sound of footsteps. After a while, the young man opened the door for you and let you in with a smile. 

"I'm glad you agreed." He said, taking over your coat from you. "Make yourself comfortable... Would you like something to drink before we start? Coffee? Tea? Water? Maybe wine?" 

"Water is enough... Although I won't actually despise wine either." You replied and timidly entered his living room. 

The room was large, definitely bigger than your friend's entire apartment. Not surprising, after all, Hyunjin lived in one of the more expensive neighbourhoods in your city. The white leather furniture, laced with gold accessories, perfectly matched the aura that this man was producing. Everything seemed truly royal. 

"Wow." You gasped in awe. 

"Do you like it? My parents made sure I was comfortable in the city.... Would you like a tour of the apartment?" He asked, handing you a glass of red wine. 

"I'd love to... If I can, of course." You accepted the drink from him and took a sip. 

The boy showed you his entire apartment. He had three bedrooms, but he had transformed one into a studio, and the other was used as a dressing room. 

"Okay, ready for us to start?" He asked as you walked through the apartment.

"I think so." You replied hesitantly.

"Great!" He smiled broadly. "Come on, I'll paint you in the studio... I'll get everything ready and you can go and change in the bathroom. Leave when you're ready. It'll take me a while to paint though... It'll take all weekend, actually. But like I said, I'll pay. $1000 is enough?"

"H-how much?" You were stunned when you heard the amount he gave.

“If it's not enough, just tell me…” He replied, watching you.

"Not enough? I didn't expect it to be so much..." You started. "It's too much…"

"Hmm... I don't think so." He shrugged. "We'll talk about it later... You can go change in the bathroom now and I'll set everything ready here." He said, unimpressed.

“Sure…” You replied and headed to the bathroom.  $1000 to pose? You were shocked. How much money does this young man actually have? 

After a few minutes you were ready. You looked at your reflection in the mirror. You were wearing a slightly see-through red nightgown that hugged your body perfectly and highlighted all your curves. You decided to leave your hair down, but you put a small decoration in it. You fixed your delicate makeup and went out to Hyunjin.

"Wow, you look amazing." He said as soon as he noticed you. "Like I said, this colour suits you very well."

"Thank you." You replied, slightly embarrassed.

"Okay, you can lie down." He pointed to a small sofa in the center of the room. "I would like you to lie down comfortably, and if you want to sleep, just close your eyes. The only thing that matters is that you stay in the position I put you in."

“Sure, I can do it…” You replied and followed his directions. You settled into a comfortable position on the sofa and Hyunjin stood over you. He leaned down gently and positioned your body. His touch was pleasant. You felt the nice warmth radiating from his body.

"Perfect." He said and smiled contentedly. "Okay, let's get started. If you want a break then say so." 

Hyunjin began to paint. You lay there without moving, watching his every move. You began to wonder how it was that your life had brought you to the point where you were. 

Hyunjin painted in concentration, and there was silence between the two of you. You didn't seem to mind. You felt your eyelids become heavy and you didn't even know when you fell asleep. 

You woke up after some time and stretched slightly. It was already twilight outside. You looked around the room you were in. Hyunjin was nowhere to be found. You stood up and stretched your stagnant body again. You were curious to see how Hyunjin's progress was going, but before you could get closer to the painting, the door of the room opened. 

"Oh, you're awake already." Hyunjin smiled slightly. "Hungry? Come, I've prepared dinner." 

Only when the boy mentioned food did you feel that you were actually hungry. You followed him into the kitchen, where delicious smells were coming from. 

"You are handsome, you paint and you cook. Is there anything you can't do?" You asked, sitting down at the table. Hyunjin glanced at you laughing. 

"Thank you for the compliment, beautiful." He winked, at which you blushed. He served you dinner and you began to eat. 

"Enough with the painting for today, it's late." Hyunjin said. "If you want, you can stay the night.... We'll start again first thing tomorrow morning anyway." 

"I don't want to get..." You started. 

"But that's not up for discussion." He interrupted you in mid-sentence. "It's late, I don't want you to go home when it's dark outside.... I'll prepare a bed for you." 

"Hyunjin, but really..." You started again but his one look left you unsure what to say next. "Okay. I'll stay the night." 

"Great." He smiled at you. "Come on, I'll give you something to sleep on..." 

" You know, after all, I can sleep in what I'm wearing." You replied while watching him. 

"Believe me, if you stay in this red nightgown, I won't hold back."  He replied with full seriousness. 

"Oh..." You made a sound. " All right..." 

You followed him to his dressing room, which occupied the other room. Hyunjin walked over to a cabinet and pulled out an oversized hoodie and handed it to you. "It should fit." He smiled slightly. 

"Thank you." You replied with a slight smile. "I'll take a shower." 

Hyunjin nodded and you parted the rooms. You went to the bathroom to take a quick shower, and a pleasant feeling once again settled in your lower abdomen. Hyunjin, on the other hand, was in the bedroom preparing a place for you to sleep. 

After some time, you came out of the bathroom in his hoodie. You could smell his perfume lingering on his clothes. You smiled slightly, to yourself. His scent was so soothing. 

"Do you like the smell?" You suddenly heard his voice behind you, at which you jumped slightly. 

"Y-yes." You stuttered, at which the boy smiled. 

"I have to say, no matter what you're wearing, you're every bit as beautiful." He said, walking closer to you. "I like you Y/N." 

"Thank you, I guess..." You took a gentle step back unsure of where this conversation was leading. 

"When I say I like you, I really mean it." Hyunjin leaned slightly over you and brushed lightly against your waist. You swallowed your saliva as you looked straight into his eyes, your back resting against the wall. Hyunjin was leaning with his hand right next to your head and his body was leaning against yours. You bit your lip slightly and gently moved your legs, feeling yourself slowly getting wet. The situation you found yourself in was definitely not on your bingo card. 

"Hyunjin, we don't..." You began, trying to keep up any semblance of a smile yet. However, his closeness and magnetic scent were too tempting to resist. 

"Shhhsh." The boy moved his thumb over your swollen lips. "You don't even realise how sexy you look right now." He whispered in your ear while biting your earlobe, which was met with a quiet sigh that left your lips. You felt his gentle smile as he moved closer to your neck and gently moved his velvety lips across it. "You like it." He stated, observing your reaction to his touch. "I wonder if you'll like this too." He added and moved his hands a little lower, slipping them under the hoodie. 

"Hyunjin, it's not..." You started, but feeling his long fingers glide across your skin, leaving goosebumps on it, you were unable to control your senses. Hyunjin's lips attacked your neck more boldly, and you tilted your head further back so he could have better access. 

Hyunjin glided his lips along your neck looking for weak spots, and once he found them, he immediately started leaving red hickeys in those spots, which was met with your moans of approval. 

You rested your hands on his torso, and the young man delicately lifted you up, grabbing your buttocks. You put your legs around his waist as his lips found their way right to yours. 

"I want you." He whispered, brushing his lips lightly against yours. "And I know you want me too. Say it." 

"Please." You said quietly. 

"You're asking? For what?" He asked backing away slightly which was met with your disapproval. 

"Kiss me, please." You moaned pleadingly. Hyunjin smiled at you and pressed his lips into yours. His kiss was firm and forceful, but that's what you liked best. You moaned blissfully into his mouth as he grabbed your buttocks tighter. Hyunjin took this as a sign of approval and carried you to his bedroom. 

Hyunjin put you on the bed immediately, finding himself above you. His knee came between your legs pressing lightly on your spot. He leaned over a little more and cupped your hoodie with his hands. 

"You are phenomenal." He said, watching you. His hands moved over every bare patch of your body, exploring every inch of it. Following his hands, Hyunjin placed you on the bed immediately finding himself over you. His knee came between your legs pressing lightly on your spot. He leaned over a little more and cupped your hoodie with his hands. His hands moved over every bare patch of your body, exploring every inch of it. His hands were followed by his lips, which also explored your body. He left wet footprints in his path, interspersed with huge hickeys. 

You moaned blissfully when his lips found their way to your lower abdomen. You felt his smile against your skin. Hyunjin gently spread your legs and moved his hand over your core. Your reaction encouraged him to continue. 

He bit lightly on the inside of your thighs, which was met with your slight jump. His strong hands, however, held your body as his mouth took up your pussy, embracing it completely. 

You moaned loudly and slid your hand into his hair. You pulled his hair gently as his tongue penetrated your insides, melting with pleasure. 

Hyunjin drove you to pleasure, and your body arched in an accompaniment of moans. The young man licked and returned his lips to your mouth, kissing you. You immediately responded to his kiss, hungry for his velvety lips. 

Your hands moved over his body. You wanted to get rid of his clothes as quickly as possible. Hyunjin laughed quietly. 

"So eager, huh? Patience darling, be good and you'll get what you deserve." He said amused and helped you undress himself. Once he was standing naked, you moved your hands over his penis, which was already ready for use. "I don't have condoms..." The boy began. 

" Doesn't matter, I want to feel you, now, right now, please!" You moaned needily. 

"I like the way you are asking." He snarled quietly and slid his full length into you. 

"Oh yes!" You whined loudly and moved your hands down his back as he began to move. 

His movements became faster and less precise. He went deep, perfectly attacking your g-spot. Your and his moans filled the entire room.

"Hyunjin! I…" You started digging your nails into his soft skin.

"Come on baby, cum for me." He groaned loudly. "Fuck!"

"I'm cumming!" You moaned loudly, clenching around him. 

A few seconds later, you felt warmth spreading through your insides. Hyunjin collapsed on top of you after a moment, his head resting between your full breasts. You were both breathing heavily.

“You are my muse." He murmured after a while. "Be my muse forever?"

"With pure pleasure." You replied quietly, gently stroking his back, making him smile.

"You know what? You are the FINE art." He said. "My muse."

And After an eventful night, you both fell asleep cuddling together.

-> Masterlist

#stray kids #skz #skz fanfic #skz reaction #hwang hyunjin #skz hyunjin #hwang hyunjin skz #kpop angst #hyunjin angst #hwang hyunjin oneshot #kpop story #kpop fanfic #hwang hyunjin fanfic #stray kids reaction #hyunjin art #hyunjin story #hyunjin x y/n #hyunjin stray kids #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin smut #hwang hyunjin x reader #hyunjin series #hyunjin scenarios

[carmenized-onions]

I Want To. | Wellness Check

logline; Such is life, you go from not being needed at The Bear today to being more needed than you ever have been.

[!!!] series history, this is the fourth; First, Second, Third

portion; 4.7k+

possible allergies; a dash of Tony's former paramedic background (and just medical shit in general) in this one, so, a sprinkle of post-trauma stress (and her usual yikes psyche). Mikey comes up a bit, as usual! despite the ops, we ball.

pairing; Carmen ‘Carmy’ Berzatto & Fem Reader (pretty unavoidably gendered episode, mb non-fem folks)

we'll talk after babe, have a good time w/ this one.

Falling asleep was easy— par for Carmen fighting to keep his 6:30 am alarm on. When he finds out you don’t have a plug on his side of the bed and he has to charge his phone on your side, he turns it off. Cute.

Well, there’s also the part where you had to ask if he was okay because it sounded like he wasn’t breathing and it turns out —He was not breathing— He then pointed out that it sounded like you weren’t breathing —You were not breathing— Both of you thought the sound of your lungs would bother the other, so you opted not to use them at all. Turns out, counterproductive; you notice each other’s absences pretty well.

But besides that, it's easy. Carmen isn’t an awful bedfellow. He’s not super shifty, he doesn’t tug the blanket, he doesn’t roll all the fucking way over to your side, or anything like that. He’s honestly concerningly still. Is he annoyed that you’ve gotta toss and turn a little to get comfortable? Probably. He's probably dreaming of you exploding right now, he’s so annoyed. He didn’t make fun of your ages old build-a-bear plush nor it’s Cubs jersey, so that was nice. Pity, probably.

...If Carmen wasn’t here, he knows he’d be stirring and kicking and probably sleep-walking to his oven to light it on fire. But he is here. Where kicking would hurt. Where stirring would wake you. Where a fire would cause more anxiety than relief because all your plants and projects would die. Where you washed his hair and told him that taking care of people doesn’t feel like a lot of work to you. Was it not a lot of work, to take care of his brother? Was it worth it, to you? Probably not. How could it be?

He wills his body to not fucking move because if he does it's going to ruin everything. He's going to ruin everything.

He wakes up at 6:30 on the dot, alarm or no. He’d be concerned if his body functioned any differently. But he can’t get to his phone while you’re sleeping in his way and you’re so comfortable. You’re clutching a bear that’s undeniably on a losing team and you’re at peace with it. He’s trying not to make a metaphor out of this in his mind; alas, it’s already there. The only thing he can do is go back to sleep and dream about killing the teenage boy in his head before he can escape again and call you pretty.

It's around ten when you wake up, you try not to wake him when you turn to grab your phone, but the split second of motion makes him flinch like he’s about to get jumped. “Relax!” You hiss, but like, soft, whispered. “I’m doin’ the fuckin’ Wordle, not smothering you with a pillow.”

“You do the Wordle?”

“Oh, fuck you—”

“The first fuckin’ thing you do in the morning is the Wordle?”

“And I do the Crossword too, bitch, what of it?”

“…I like Connections.”

“I fuckin' hate Connections.”

“Alright, damn!”

The Chicago accent in both of you is stronger in your rasping morning voices. As is the laughter. You roll onto your stomach to get closer to him and let him see your screen. Neither of you have entirely woken up yet and that means it’s the perfect time to do a puzzle. If you don't focus on this puzzle right now, you fear you will get too comfortable in this idea of domesticity.

“C’s in the right place. Nothin’ else though.”

He’s the one that figures out its Cumin. You pretend not to be mad about this. You’re furious. Of course, it’d be a spice on the day Mr Food Guy sleeps over. Bullshit.

When you finally sit up, stretch, and say, “I’m just gonna shower real quick ‘nd—”

He’s at a breakneck speed to reply, “I’ll make breakfast.”

“Oh, you cook all the fuckin’ time, you don’t have to—”

“I want to.”

You blink, then shrug, the man likes to cook, c’est la vie. “Who am I to refuse?”

He looks far too happy about this, as though he’s won a lottery. A lottery of manual labour. He rolls out of bed, grabbing his back pack stuffed with yesterday’s clothes before leaving you to your own devices. In a literal sense, too, since you get a text. Ugh.

‘Gigi called in, can you reach?’

You would prefer not to reach, but this is capitalism.

‘When's the shift?’

‘6:30 to 12:30’

Why couldn’t something else at The Bear be fuckin’ broken today?

‘yeah i can reach’

‘that’s my girl, red tops today, see u’

You have also won the lottery of manual labour today. Look at you and Carm, luckiest people alive. Something like that. Alright, go shower and be normal about the fact that there’s a Michelin Star Chef making you breakfast in your kitchen. And he’s prett—

“You make your own bread.”

“I do.” You sit at your own little breakfast nook, waiting to be served. Towel hung around your neck post shower. You’d offer to help, but based on his urgency to cook for you, it’s gonna be a no. Plus, the gift on the table you’ve got for him is going to piss him off enough, can't poke this bear too much. He's already given you a mile. Too many idioms.

“I like to think in another universe I am a homesteader who makes her own soaps and renders tallow n’ shit. But I settle for growing basil and making sourdough in my shitty little Chicago apartment for now.”

“I like your apartment.” He hums, though amused. He turns and sets your plate—the one black plate— in front of you with a small smile. This smile immediately falls when he pushes the plate towards you and you push a travel bag of toiletries towards him.

“Fuck is this?”

“I don’t want to hear any complaints, Irish Spring.”

“How d’you know I use Irish Spring?”

“It’s all five of your routine, it’s going to be pungent— Now listen.” You pick up the bag; you’d dug through your sink cabinet and found a dollar store pack of plastic travel bottles, unused from cancelled trips of yesteryear. You've decanted your own products for him. It's fine, you buy jumbo sizes anyways...

“Shampoo, conditioner, face wash—They’ve even got labels.”

He takes the bag from you, setting it down on his side of the counter, begrudgingly. Though he hasn’t particularly paid it much mind, tunnelled on something else entirely, “Do you not like Irish Spring?”

"I didn't give you a body wash, you can still use it for that one purpose."

"Yeah, but do you not like Irish Spring?"

"...I think it's fine."

“Fine?”

“I’m more of an Old Spice fan.”

“You don’t deserve breakfast—” He pulls your plate, you pull it back.

“All I said—” “Thinkin’ I smell like shit—” “Did not say that—!” “Just cause you use the fruity stuff—” “I smell good! Deny that I smell good!” “You smell fine.” “Wowww—Whatever, do the thing.”

“Bruschetta with a breakfast twist.” Ah, that makes him give you the plate back. His kink is explaining food. “Sourdough toasted, topped with fresh basil—”

“Courtesy of me.”

“Courtesy of you, yes. Tomatoes, bacon glazed in balsamic, and you didn’t have parm so I used feta. And then, y’know, over medium egg on top.”

“You’re very good, Carmen.”

“Oh, I—Uh—” You haven’t even tried it yet. You’re telling him he’s good for the sake of the effort he’s given alone. He needs an antacid. “Thank you.”

It’s redundant to say his food is good. But what else can you say? It’s a fucking perfect open face sandwich. But he’s eating it with you, and half of it’s your own handiwork, and all of your pantry, so you leave your praises purely reaction based, unsaid.

You're honestly a little distracted, reading too hard into the act of him giving you the black plate and taking one of your shitty plastic ones for himself. Time to talk.

“Itinerary for today?”

“Gotta talk chaos menu with Syd before opening, then, well, running the restaurant all night… And then I’ll—I’ll go home.”

“Yeah? You can come back here, if you want to.” Thank God you took a bite in time to hide your selfish disappointment. It’s good for him to go home, but then he’s not here. Real Catch-22.

He shakes his head, “I think I’m good now. Thanks, though. What’s—What’s uh, your plans for today?”

“I’m gonna drop you off wherever you’re going, n’ then I’m gonna go shopping for Syd’s gift—”

“It’s her fuckin’ birthday or somethin?” It’s a delight how immediately panicked he is by this. You're also thankful because he's so distracted it means you won't have to tell him the rest of your plans for today. You'd like to keep that life separate. For as long as possible, at least.

“Nono, it’s just, I didn’t get her anything for her opening night and I wanna change that. I’ll get you something too.”

“You don’t have to—”

“I want to.” The very idea of waiting for his response is freaking you the fuck out, so you’re quick to clear your voice and add. “I’ll give you my number, in case you end up needing to crash.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay. Ey, text me your invoice too.”

You take both your cleared plates to the sink, and the lie is swift. You've gotten a lot better at that, in the past year.

“Oh no worries, your sister already covered it.”

It is 6:30 and your life is over. Kidding. Unless? You dropped off Carmen at the train station hours ago and, to use his words, ‘it’s hit’. He’s at The Bear and there’s nothing for you to fix there— So you’re not.

You’ve only been there like three times and yet it started to feel… Like your thing!

Like, like you’d just come in everyday and… Dunno, fix something... But it’s not like they’re gonna have a crisis everyday. Especially not ones that Fak can't handle himself if needed— There's no way he's gonna last at hosting, anyways. You’re now realizing the unrealistic dream— Possibly more unrealistic than homestead you.

Speaking of, Homestead You would probably throw up, if she saw the you you’re looking at in the mirror right now. You look good. Objectively, you know you look good. The mug is stamped. Your pants are black, high-waisted, and give you an ass. The bright red leather corset top is… Chafing, but it looks good! It's a sweetheart neckline so you have to take off your long rope chain necklace from Mikey and shove it in your pocket— Which is fine and doesn't feel bad at all. And listen, listen, being an on-call bottle girl is good money!

And you might get put on bar tonight! You don’t know for sure if you’re gonna have to juggle around lit up bottles for a bunch of fucking geezers!

...

God, fuck, it’s 10:20 and your life is over.

This group of geezers have been fucking annoying and fucking Cherry wouldn’t get off fucking bar even though you literally covered for her last week and these stupid grandpas asked if gratuity is included— No fucking shit! Did you take their card and put a 40% tip? Yeah, maybe. Fuck them! They’re too fucking rich to notice! And they took three hours to leave! Gonna bash this champagne bottle over his bald fucking—

“Ey! That’s a face I remember.”

You hear your name— Not Tony, not Chip, not Cousin. Your name.

You turn to see, oh fucking hell, let God kill you—

“Uncle J!~ Good to see you!~ What a surprise! It’s Jack, here.” Jack of all Trades. It was cute at the time of sign up. Your smile is bright, fake, strained, and beautiful.

“Been too long, really.” Cicero isn’t a bad guy—Correction: Cicero isn’t a bad guy, to you, but as Mikey once put it, he’s a fuckin’ ball buster and in your case, you’re one of the few people beneath him that he asks favours from. Always wants free labour and your expertise. And he always has a habit of asking for favours the second you need one back. But you don’t need one right now! So it’s fine! Everything’s fine!

“Do your Uncle a favour,”—Fully not your Uncle—“Could you pair me and my friends here with a good red?”

You let it go that they’re having fish and asking for a red. Stupid thing to get hung up over right now. You make a commission of it anyways; you just pick the most expensive bottle. He won’t know the difference. The Bear would know the difference. Carmen would notice the difference... Alright, relax.

While pouring glasses, Jimmy whispers to his compatriots and one by one they all peel off. It is almost alarming how quickly this group of men turn and leave without a second thought, taking their glasses with them.

You raise your brows and look at Cicero. “Ah. This is the moment where I sit?”

He nods, gesturing to the booth. “This is the moment where you sit.”

You slip into the booth, sitting across from him. “What do you need?”

“Right to the point with you.”

“I hate suspense.” You shrug.

“You liked Mikey.”

What the fuck?

You bite your inner cheek, hard. “Don’t say that shit.”

“I liked him too,” He says it solemnly, like your mutual grief is a proper apology. He takes a long sip of his stupid red wine. “Did you hear? Cousin Vinnie and Mira are gettin’ hitched, finally.”

“I have no fucking idea who Vinnie and Mira are.” You take the glass when he hands it to you, taking a sip. Small. You gotta drive home, after all.

“Really? It’s a big wedding—Destination too, in New York—”

“I hate to remind you, but I was friends with Mikey, not his family.” Not his biological one, at least. The Beef, sure. But you literally only met his siblings two days ago. “What’s a wedding gotta do with me?”

He bristles, and finally cuts it short. “Around three hundred guests, seven-hour shift, open bar—” “Oh, for fuckssake—” “Listen—”

“It’s an easy gig, I’ll fly you out for it, it’s a month and a half away, you’ll get to attend a big fuckin’ Italian wedding— Which will be a shitshow, certainly, so free entertainment; and Michelin Star level catering, kind of.”

You squint. Kind of? “You got Carmy in on this shit?”

“You know ‘em?”

You nod, pressing your elbows on the table, “We’ve recently become acquainted. What d’you got on him for him to cater a wedding?”

“He’s eight-hundred grand in the hole.” “Fuck!” “He gets thirty off for catering. Smart boy, said yes.”

Christ, you massage the bridge of your brow with one hand and pull out your phone with another to check your calendar, you might as well see if you can even entertain the idea. You don’t need a favour right now, maybe you can bargain and get him to actually pay you for it, this time.

“I dunno, Uncle J…”

Oh.

28 unread texts from Syd.

3 unread texts from an unknown number— Probably Carmen.

9 missed calls from Syd.

Uncle Jimmy, always, always, has a fucking way, of asking for a favour when you need one…

You slam your phone, screen down on the table, straightening your posture in your seat. “I have demands.”

He motions for you to continue, taking his wine glass back. “You always do.”

“You and your friends are gonna tip a hundred percent tonight.”

“That why you give me a 2016 Fisher?”

“I like to think ahead.”

“Smart girl.” He shrugs, palms of his hands out. Which means yes.

“If Uncle Lee comes up to the bar I’m throwing a fork at him and leaping over the counter.”

He chuckles, “Thought you 'didn’t know family'.”

“I remember what I'm told.”

His amusement fades quickly, remembering first hand. He nods. “…You’re allowed to jump him if I’m watching first.”

“And you’re friends with my boss, right?”

“We’re acquainted.”

“I’m gonna punch out now and you’re gonna smooth that out for me.”

He perks up, amused, glancing at your phone, “Somethin’ come up, Chip?”

“Don’t call me Chip.” He wants to poke at you, just a little bit more, but there’s a rattled look in your eyes that he’s so rarely seen that he lets it go.

He waves his hand, shrugging, “Be safe. I'll send you the details. December wedding, remember.”

At the end of the day, Cicero isn’t a bad guy to you, someone who loved his nephew as much as he did.

You’re running to your car while you dial back Syd. You don’t have time to read the texts, all you need to know is that it’s an emergency. She picks up just after the first ring.

“Syd what the—” “Code blue!”

You almost fall on your face and eat asphalt. For a flash, you’re in the back of an ambulance being handed a defibrillator at the age of 22, surrounded by faces just as scared and young as you. Then you’re back in the parking lot, slotting the key into your car door because the fob doesn’t work. It’s never worked.

“S-Someone’s having a fucking heart attack!?”

“What?!”

“That’s what fucking code blue means!”

“Oh my god! Sorry! No, I was just saying the thing that scares doctors the most!”

“Yeah, I’m fuckin’ scared Syd!” You slide into the driver’s seat and slam your car door shut. You take a deep breath, white knuckling the steering wheel. “…I’m-I'm sorry for yelling! Where are you, what’s going on?”

“The—The Bear, the restaurant.” The second you have a location you’re revving off.

“Nat locked herself in the office—” “Like trapped?” This shit again?

“No, no— Like she locked herself in— She did this like two hours ago and I thought she was just taking a breather— But we’ve closed and, and like almost everyone left and she’s still not coming out— And she blocked the door inside— and— And I think she’s trying to hide that she’s basically shrieking in pain every five minutes.”

You take a long time to register anything she’s just said. Her tone is as panicked as you feel on the inside. You’re only now registering the ambient yelling of Richie and Carmen in the background.

“…Did—Can you hear me?”

“Yeah, yeah Syd, I’m just thinking.” You don’t step on the gas on purpose, it just happens. “A pregnant woman is screaming in pain— in intervals— behind a blockaded door?”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Have you called an ambulance?”

There’s a much more distinct yell in the background from Richie, “No cops!”

Then from Carmen, “No coverage!”

“Yeah…” Syd shakily continues for them, “The insurance is a problem, and Richie said— Motherfucker—” You hear a muffled scrap over the phone before Richie continues on for Syd.

“Er, yeah, Cousin, Sugar keeps yelling that she’s fine ‘n blocked the door, if we call the cops they’re gonna ram that shit down and take her to the loony bin.”

“That’s not— That’s not what paramedics do.”

“That’s what they all do.”

“Richie, y’know, I was a paramedic, right?”

“…You a fuckin’ fed, Chip?”

“Richie, if I was a fuckin' narc you would be in prison by now. I, I— I'll be there in like, like eight minutes, everyone stop fucking yelling at Sugar!”

You’re there in four. You almost rear end someone and you run every yellow you get but you’re there in four. You don’t park properly in the back, you just drive your car in and turn it off in the middle of the lot. You don’t bother to be let in, you just punch the code in as you remember it. As Natalie told you.

“Oh good you—Oh my, God?” Syd is no better than a man in this moment, going from grateful for your presence to being one intrusive thought away from whistling.

You did not have time to change out of your ...outfit and someone has been hogging your Carhartt. You pass Syd quickly, waving a hand in front of her face. Goddammit, why do your boot heels have to have that incredibly satisfying femme fatale click right now?

“Alright— Relax—”

“Holy shit, Chippy!” Richie was yelling at Sugar through the door along with Carm, but once alerted to your presence is now snapping his fingers. You'd describe him more as impressed than actually attracted to you. “You clean up!”

 “Cousin, are you—” He grabs Carmen’s face, turning it to you— Carmen does of course, immediately slap Richie’s hand away which of course, means they just start smacking each other's hands. Like preteen girls. “Ey, get the fuck off—” “I just want you to look at a pretty girl, Cousin—!” “Stop fuckin’ touchin’ me!” “Are you looking!?” “I—”

“Everyone shut the fuck up!”

You silence the room. You’re thankful most of the staff has left by now since it’s well after close. It's just Carmen, Syd, Richie, Tina, and Fak for some goddamn reason...You can't be mean you're handymen, you have to stick together.

“I look different from the usual jumpsuit, yes, we get it, can we move on? Pregnant woman?”

Syd is the first to speak, “…Were you on a date, though?”

You blink and roll your eyes all at once, twisting your head to her, “Syd—”

“It’s good to see you getting out there, baby.” Tina, deeply unhelpful in this moment, puts a hand around your shoulder. Oh to have a mother’s judgment when she’s not even your mother.

“O-kay!” You drag on the ‘kay’, clapping your hands together, “Everyone, just get your thoughts out in the next five seconds and then we’re moving on.”

“Chippy, I cannot believe you’ve held this out on me—” “—I meant it like-like a concerned, did we interrupt your date—” “—The red is unbelievable on you, Cousin!” “I need you to teach me how you do your makeup—” “Can you— can you yell again—?” “Fak!” “Oh, so that’s too much?”

A cacophony, it continues on. Your eyes glaze over, and you’re waiting for Sugar to let out a scream so everyone remembers the fucking point of being here. But then you look at Carmen. Everyone’s pivoted from staring at you to yelling at each other. But Carmen; Carmen is still looking at you. Stupid soft scary eye contact. And his voice is so much quieter than the yelling but it’s the thing that you hear anyways.

“It looks tight.”

There’s a possibility that when you killed the teenage girl inside you that you also killed the feminist. Because there’s a small sub-sect of you that’s upset that he’s not objectifying you right now. That his vision is focused on you. Not the changes. He doesn’t seem to look at you any differently than when you’re wearing a jumpsuit and utility belt, covered in toilet water. This should not be annoying and yet it is.

“It is.”

He nods, eye contact unshifting, unblinking, “You wanna change?”

“Maybe after we find out whether or not your sister is in labour.”

He nods. He takes a second but he nods.

You approach him, rather, the door, knocking gently. Everyone quiets down.

You clear your throat, and once more, the persona is put on, you’re a paramedic, putting on that soft but firm reassuring authoritative tone. “E-M Rescue, I got a call for a wellness check on Natalie Berzatto?”

“Tony—” A groan of pain behind the door, “I am perfectly well! Everyone go home!”

You grimace, you motion with your hand for Fak to hand you a screwdriver— He keeps one in his breast-pocket, even when wearing a suit. Hey, you should start doing that.

“Nat, I’m a paramedic— Or I was—will you please let me in?”

“I don’t— Fuck! —Need a paramedic!”

“Never hurts to do a check-up, Nat.” You speak calmly, like you always did. “Listen, lover, if you don’t open the door, I’m gonna have to take it off its hinges, and we're gonna lose medic patient confidentiality.”

When she doesn’t reply after a good beat, you start to unscrew the top hinge; she can hear it, “Wait, wait, wait— Fuck-Fuck— I’m opening it!”

There’s another series of pained groans as she exerts herself to open the door, and once she does, it’s only by a crack, to look at you and you alone. She’s absolutely been crying. She speaks in a whispered tone. “Just you.”

You nod, handing the screwdriver back to Fak without breaking eye contact with her. “Just me.”

She cracks it open just enough for you to come in. And so, you do. Everyone is, for the first time, too worried about her shutting down to interrupt or yell a complaint.

You close the door behind you, pressing your back to it. You note the toppled over chair by your feet that she must’ve blocked it with. Plus the puddle of amniotic fluid beneath her. Oh fuck.

...

“You wanna talk or do you just want me to check your contractions?”

“I’m—” She shakes her head, covering her face. She half sits on the desk. “I’m fucking— I am not ready for this.”

“Yeah.” You nod. You’re not here to convince anyone they’re ready to be a fucking mother. But you’re here to listen, certainly.

“She’s gonna hate me.”

“Who?”

“Her—!” Her voice is choked, another contraction. You’re silently taking the time in your head. She points to her stomach.

“And— And we just opened, and— And I’m gonna have to go on maternity leave, which is the last fucking thing we need and— and— If I could just fucking keep her in!”

“Natalie.” You put a hand on her shoulder, she finally looks at you. “This is happening.”

“Not help—fu—ll.”

“I know it’s not. This is scary and there are no take backs—” “Very unhelp—”

“Nat, your daughter wants to meet you.”

You squeeze her shoulder; she looks like she’s gonna cry all over again for a completely different reason. “She probably won’t hate you. Who’s to say. But I know you’ll love her. And that’s enough, isn’t it?”

She nods, emphatically, but something is still bothering her. You squeeze her shoulder again. You whisper, so even if everyone’s ear is pressed to the door— Which you doubt, she’s screaming after all, they won’t hear.

“Carmen will still know you love him, even when you're not here.”

She immediately goes for a hug, you reciprocate with a shuddered ease. She sniffs, head on your shoulder. She stays there for a while before letting you go, nodding. “Okay.”

You hand her the tissue box next to her on the table, she takes it thankfully, crushing it in her hand. Another contraction. Oh, that couldn't have been more than 2 minutes. Oh fuck.

You kneel down in front of her, and you’re simply no longer in your body as a person but just the paramedic. You could not be more thankful that she’s wearing a dress today. Awkward requests of spreading legs and pulling off underwear aside, Natalie’s daughter does in fact really want to meet her. Oh fuck.

You look up at Natalie, between her knees, you speak cool, professional. “You’re crowning. This is gonna have to happen here. I'll have someone call your husband.”

You’re so calm that it doesn’t give Natalie the feeling or need to freak out, she just breathes. “Okay. Okay.”

You stand upright. “Do you prefer this office or somewhere else?”

“I can’t— Move.”

“Makes sense. Makes total sense. Okay. I’ll go get everything we need, I’ll be right back. I might send some people in, okay, love?”

She just grunts in reply, nodding, now that she’s not in as much emotional pain, she can entirely focus on her brutalizing physical pain.

“Oh, hey, I know—” You grab her purse, pulling out her phone and ear buds, handing them to her with haste, your calm demeanour is faltering just a bit. “Listen to some music, loud, y’know, chill…” You put the pods in her ear for her. She’s again, in too much pain to tell you to fuck off, and just plays her music loud.

You softly open the door, smiling just a bit too much as you leave, and very softly close the door behind you. Looking at the motley crew before you, your persona immediately falls apart. You really only wanted her to play music so you could scream. “Oh, my fucking God.”

“What’s happening, she good?” What a sweet, stupid brother, Sugar has.

You purse your lips together, eyes wide, shaking your head. “She’s going to give birth in like— Maybe six minutes. Max ten.” Everyone goes to speak in an uproar of panic, and then you slap yourself in the face. Hard. That stuns them silent.

“Alright!” You press your hands over your eyes, “Tina!”

She’s been around this block before, “What do you need?”

“Can you go sit in there with her? Tell her all the breathing exercises and shit? Keep her calm? Coming from you it won’t seem so—”

“Condescending as fuck?”

“Yes, exactly, can you?”

“Gotchu, baby.” She claps your shoulder when she walks past and into the office.

You clap hers in tandem, “Thank you, Mama—Okay, Richie!”

“Yeah?”

“I’m gonna need you to call Nat’s husband—”

“Why do I—”

“Because you’re a fuckin’ dad, Rich, and he will need you!” You’re yelling all pissed, snapping your fingers at him, but he does light up when you say it like that. “I don’t care if he wets his fuckin’ bed, tell him to get here!”

He salutes, walking off, “Aye aye, Cap’n Chip.”

You shake off the sting in your hand, God, you really did slap yourself too hard. You turn to the next targets. “Syd, Fak.”

Syd responds hesitantly for the both of them, since Fak is silently enjoying your colonel persona a little too much. “…Yes, C-Captain?”

“I need towels, a lot of clean towels— cloth ones, like sanitized clean— Warm half in water— And then I need a clean sheet— A table cloth or something, I don’t fucking care, something clean and big that you’re fine destroying. I need sterile sheaths, Syd you get those— Other than that, however they get to me, I don’t give a shit— Just scrub in before you touch anything!”

They almost knock into each other the way they run so fast. You yell after them. “Get the big sheet first, she needs to lay down!”

“Yes, Chef!”

You take a deep breath before moving your gaze onto Carmy. The screaming lead EM in you melts off your shoulders, just for the second.

He asks before you can even say anything, “Yes, Chef?”

“I need you to scrub in and get me gloves and an apron—” “On it, Chef—” “And you’re gonna sit in with me for the birth of your niece.”

He cringes, not to refuse, but just the mounting reality of the situation is dawning on him. His sister is going to give birth to his niece in their shared office of his high-class restaurant within it's first week of open.

But you then tag on, “Carmy, she needs you— Frankly, I’m not the one giving birth but fuckin' I need you. T-There.”

He softens instantly, like tranquilizing— Well, a bear.

“Yes, Chef.”

I know the opening probably feels so far away by now, but i do want to note that Breakfast Bruschetta is my own recipe that I used to make like every fuckin' day pre-employment. It's so goddamn good. I highly recommend it, babes. It's balsamic with brown sugar dissolved, btw, Carmy's just a quick explainer.

I wrote like a solid 75% of the labour sequence before deciding it just needed to have the breathing room of it's own chapter, so until next time for that one bbs. But I'm excited for it! And also dreading it! A lot of hard conversations combined with giving birth = nightmare to write, but well worth it, i think. Speaking of: I don't believe at the end of Season 2 that Sugar is at the end of her term of 36 weeks, but in our case here, she is. I'm very much so not interested in a very scary premature birth for our girl!! She's okay!! Dw!! I just wonked with time a little, hope that's okay.

And hey, look at that reveal! Bartender/Sommelier was code for bottle service-- Which is a very respectable career, btw, don't get it twisted-- I was critiquing it only in the way I would critique literally any other job: Misery Under Capitalism. And now we've got that fuckin' wedding in the future midst! Ah!!

Anyways please send me your thoughts ad nauseam, I reload my activity feed every 3 seconds to see what you guys are thinking. If you reblog, tell me what you think in the tags!! Yell at me in the replies!! Send an anon in!! I don't bite, I swear <3

#carmen berzatto #carmen berzatto imagine #carmen berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x you #carmen x reader #carmy berzatto #carmy x reader #the bear fanfiction #the bear x reader #carmy the bear #the bear fx

[divinationsanctuary19]

Pick one- School edition📚

Will I be successful at school?

1. 2. 3.

Welcome to my magical space, fellow readers 🌙

I enjoy reading cards, if you just need counselling I will be here, you can reach me out!🫀

Commissions are open

Are you ready? Let's go

1.

Card: 4 of wands

This year is coming to an end, you can finally sit still and enjoy your days, because you studied so hard throughout the year, now you deserve some rest.

Your hard work is paying off, you will see by the end of the school year. You are going to get high grades for sure.

If you are waiting for an answer from a famous university, you will get it: you will be admitted in your chosen place.

I can also feel you are going to celebrate this success with your loved ones. Possibly, you have made new friends at school or the atmosphere there has been particularly positive lately. This celebration will bring a closer bond.

Rejoice, you achieved your goals.

-------------------------------------------------

2.

Card: 10 of swords

I would say, congratulations! You made it through one of the hardest school years. Everything is coming to an end, so does your suffering: this is a card that signifies the final ending, it means you have done everything you could and now it's time to walk away. A new beginning awaits, this cycle of suffering, struggle and sorrow is coming to an end. I feel like all your hard work is going to be worth it. Don't lose your hope. You have been working very hard, pushing yourself to collapse, and forced to take a rest. All of this may have been necessary for you to grow; when you go forward and heal from this ordeal, think of what you have learned.

-------------------------------------------------

3.

Card: 3 of pentacles

This denotes dedication and a strong work ethic: you studied diligently throughout all the year, your learnt everything you needed to, you always got high grades. The three pentacles reveals a successful beginning towards achieving your goals, it is a sign of encouragement that you should press on with the same effort without giving up. Keep in mind the greater goal; this will help you all come together.

However, you weren't alone in this, you often supported others and used others as a support. I see study groups, projects, cooperation. You helped others with their school struggles, you acted as a teacher, a guide. Your help was fundamental.

Other posts:

Your Talents reading| Love Reading| Commissions

Pictures source: Cocorrina

#free tarot #love reading #tarot cards #tarot reading #tarot spread #tarot stuff #tarotblr #tarotcommunity #tarots #astro observations #astro community #astro notes #astrology #tarot readings #tarot reader #tarot #daily tarot #pick a photo #pick a card #pick a pile #pick an image #tarot community #tarot commissions #tarot collection #tarot challenge #studyblr #study motivation #studyspo #rory gilmore #gilmore girls

[bakathief]

I'm a little shy! But I would like to express my amazement and admiration! A while ago I found your Shadow Chase art, I loved it and became a fan, you create very funny stories and your art is beautiful, but that's not the point, I started following you because of that, but then I realized that you have many others projects and You are also very busy with your personal life. My question is how is everything organized and planned to advance a project despite academic/work responsibilities? I've seen that you even have collaborations with others and I keep thinking "this person is great." As a final note, I just want to leave my good wishes and hope you have a nice week. <3

Gosh, so many compliments in one ask, I‘m still a little loss for words. Thank you so much for reading my work and looking into my other projects, collabs and art! I hope you‘ve been enjoying them. ❤️ 

I think there is no denying that I need to organize myself a little bit to make everything work. I think I‘ve always used drawing, especially drawing comics, as a way to breathe and when I started uni I promised myself I would continue drawing somehow. The first semester was hell, but I finished all the way. 💪 And I had the same mindset for working, so when I started this year I was very motivated to draw. Lol I think it also helped that I had several different projects to work on so when I wasn’t in the mood for black and white I would move to something colorful. Comics also offer the possibility to work on different parts. Do I want to work on the story, on the storyboards, on the actual drawings or just editing…? A lot of options. And this is something which I heard on a video on AI but artist and creative people in general don‘t create in other to have more content but to get something out of their head and feel the satisfaction of creating a certain idea and I felt that very much. And then there is the joy of collabs and while there were unfortunately more failed attempts at collabs I’m very glad for those which eventually resulted in great projects. ❤️ I might have to take actual breaks from drawing when I get back to my thesis. I finished all the work but need to write the discussion part and wow, how much I don‘t wanna work on that. 

Currently I use my time on commutes for drawings digitally or making storyboards. In the evening I finish private stuff and when time is left I work on traditional art. Shadow Chase is the only project where I try to have an overview on how many pages I have done and want to finish before the next upload. Other works can usually go up once finished. When I create something for fan projects like zines, bigbangs, etc. I usually just try to finish said project right away. I don‘t like procrastinating (except my thesis I guess) and rather have stuff than can be finished done right away and focus on my other projects again.  Shades of Tourmaline was definitely my biggest collab project yet and with the amount of art planned it took like 3 years to finish because that was something I couldn‘t get done right away. 😂 fortunately clef was very patient with me (and kept me distracted with new collabs, oops). 

The short answer would be I try to draw as much as possible because it is just a lot of fun with the additional bonus of entertaining a few people. ❤️ 

#I hope I don‘t sound smart or anything #But drawing is honestly just a lot of fun #And working on ideas in general #Getting them out #That‘s the life #And sometimes I just get to talk to really cool people because of that too 😎 #Thank you again for looking into my work 💕

[iamleesi]

THE HUNTERS & THE SOLDIER

Pairing: Avenger! Bucky Barnes x OC! Avenger Reader

Summary: You explain everything to the guys and have some bad news in the end

Warnings: Mention of cannibalism, mention of experiments, lady with an axe, needles, missing people, some creepy stuff I WARNED YOU -> 18+ !!

Other: English isn’t my first language so I apologize in advance for eventual mistakes. Also I wrote this with like two hours of sleep so yk

-> Masterlist

-> Part five ; Part seven

-> The Wendigo Project (06)

You were in Mrs White’s office, lounging on her luxurious leather couch. The soft hum of the air conditioning filled the room as you unwrapped a candy she had given you just before she started shouting angrily into the phone. You had witnessed many of her outbursts before, mainly towards her employees, so her current anger didn’t surprise you. She usually kept you out of earshot during these episodes, but for some reason she didn’t ask you to leave that time.

You didn’t mind, as her couch was more comfortable than your bed and her office widow provided a view of the woods outside. So you were simply chilling as she was red in anger.

“You’re an idiot, Mike! That was the only - no, don’t blame this on me! Do you know how hard it is to find one? That was our only subject and you killed it!” She kept shouting, piquing your curiosity this time.

“I don’t care! How can we continue working if we’re empty handed?! I don’t care if we have one last sample, our main resource of blood is dead! ” Her yelling continued, and you sat up straight as she started to smash things around. “What?! Don’t you even dare suggesting it.”

Then, she glanced at you. “No.” She said, after debating something in silence. “She’s needed alive - you know why.”

You frowned. Was she talking about you?

“I don’t care. She’s- Michael.” That sounded like a warning. “Everything’s going to shit here, if she dies we lose our only- how can you be sure? I know what she is, don’t forget I was the one who gave b- yes, but I don’t think she can take it. If she turns, I’ll lose my only tie to him and I can’t risk it.”

She sighed, sinking down on her chair behind her desk - her eyes flickered to you once again. “If she dies, I’ll destroy everything you hold dear, which is yourself.” She said, letting out a defeated sigh. She agreed.

She hung up the phone, throwing the object on the desk in front of her. You two stayed silent for what seemed like an eternity, as you knew better than to talk to her whenever she was having these moments. But she spoke first.

“Kid?” She glanced over at you.

“Yeah?”

“You have a mission. The most important one, and I need you to survive. Can you do that for me?”

“I can do anything.”

You vaguely remember exactly what happened next, but you knew it messed you up completely.

Mrs White had a worried expression on as her scientists secured you to the bed, with countless needles piercing your skin. The pain was deadly, unlike anything you had ever experienced before. But you could take it, you had to. It was for the greater good.

You fell finally unconscious after a while, still unsure to this day if it was due to the horrible pain or if they gave you something. When you finally awoke, your senses were intensified - every sound, every smell, every sensation was amplified making you feel lost and disorientated.

Not to talk about the headache, but it was all worth it. As soon as you saw Mrs White’s proud smile, you decided then you’d do it all over again. Praises came from left and right, you were being treated better than before and you finally, finally made it to a higher level. You were finally allowed out of the facility, actively fighting on the field.

You had new super strength and stamina, able to lift weights that you couldn’t before. The only human who survived to the “Wendigo Project” without turning into a monster but still having the creature’s abilities. Super strength was one of those, but the one Mrs White was the most proud about was the fact that using your blood, they were able to create more things like you.

None of them turned out like you though, each one of those subjects turned into a tall, pale monster with sharp teeth with an unnatural hunger for human meat.

However, that stopped being a problem the second they found out you were able to control them. In that second, Hydra had their most lethal weapon. Wendigos can’t die easily, and they can live for hundreds of years with minimal care. They’re strong, incredible hunters during the day and unmatchable during the night - that’s what Hydra wanted and they got it because of you.

≈

Dean, Sam and Bucky were looking at you in silence as you finished explaining yourself, and you’d lie if you said you weren’t scared of their judgment. You had purposely avoided this topic because you knew that people would look at you differently, and how could they not?

Not only you had the blood of a pureblood monster, but you helped them creating new ones. You were the reason why so many people were torn away from their lives - it was all because of you. Even the monster downstairs, whether it was Cassandra or not, was one because of you.

“So… the reason why they won’t attack you is because you have their blood?” Sam blinked a few times, and you could see he was looking at you differently now, as if you were a time bomb.

“I guess.” You shrugged.

“Why can you control them?” Sam frowned. “How do you do it?”

“I don’t know, Sam.” You said, sighing heavily. Unfortunately a lot of questions were still unanswered. “I just… do. It comes naturally.”

“You look good for being one.” Dean said, gaining a glare from the other two men. “What? It’s true. I’m not blind.”

“This makes no fucking sense.” Bucky spoke after a moment. “Why you? Why didn’t you turn into… that.”

You shrugged. “If I knew I would have told you.” You said. “But unfortunately no one ever told me in the first place. I’m as clueless as you are.”

“But the Wendigo only eat human meat. Did you… eat it? Ever? Do you feel the need to?” Sam asked, cautiously scanning your face almost as if he was trying to find some similarities to the monster downstairs. His usual softness was replaced by a look of mistrust, and you saw his hand on the holster on his belt, probably holding a knife.

Useless anyway, and he knew it.

“No, to both of your questions. God, just the thought of it makes me sick.” You scoffed.

Bucky followed your gaze, noticing his hand placement too. “If you make any sudden movement I’ll snap your neck.” His voice was incredibly low - and hot. He was hot, and if it wasn’t for his hatred towards you, you would have shot your shot already. Anyways.

“Let’s all just take a step back, alright?” Dean interjected, getting slightly between Sam and Bucky. “Sam.” He warned. “The knife.”

Sam’s gaze darted between you and Dean, uncertain, as he eventually raised his hand, his voice barely above a whisper as he spoke. “I’m sorry. It’s just… we’re used to kill things like you.”

“Speaking of which…” You begun, curious to finally find out who you have been dealing with for the last few days. “Who are you two?”

“We’re hunters.” Dean replied matter-of-factly, with a proud little grin on his face.

Bucky’s brows knitted together in confusion, mirroring your own. “Why would Fury send two hunters to help us? We’re not dealing with animals here.” Bucky said.

“We don’t kill animals.” Sam clarified. “We hunt supernatural creatures. Ghosts, vampires, werewolves, demons… anything you can think of.”

You raised a brow, and as you were about to question him further you were interrupted by Bucky’s laugh. The three of you looked at him taken aback - not once you had heard that sound coming from him in the year you had worked together.

“What? You don’t believe us?” Dean asked, a hint of offense in his voice.

Bucky’s laugh died down, replaced by a wry smile. “We play chess with an alien tree, of course I believe you.” He remarked dryly - that wasn’t really a happy laugh, now that you heard his next words. “Oh my god. All I’ve ever wanted was come back home from the war and live my life, now I’m stuck in an attic with two ghostbusters and a cannibal when downstairs a lady with an axe is dismembering someone. Life is fucking crazy.”

“Hey, I’m not a cannibal!” You protested with a scowl. “How do you know the ghostbusters?”

“Parker.” Bucky scoffed.

“Really? I thought you didn’t like the kid.”

“I don’t like anyone.”

“Fair.”

You all fell silent as soon as you started to hear someone, Mrs fucking Miller, dragging a heavy weight across the floor downstairs.

“We need to leave.” You said. “We need to get home and try to make some light out of all of this.”

* * * *

“Are you sure you’re not hungry?” Dean looked at you from the mirror of his car, making you roll your eyes.

“If you ask that one more time I’ll bite your neck.” You playfully remarked, sinking down on your seat.

Escaping the house without a scratch had been a stroke of luck, especially considering Bucky’s suggestion to jump out of the first window you came across - a plan to which surprisingly everyone agreed to. You and Bucky were fine, obviously, but for a second you got worried about the brothers’s sanity since they didn’t have super abilities like you and the Soldier.

As you drove away in Dean’s beloved car, leaving that house behind you for what you hoped was the last time, exhaustion fell over you once again. After all, it had been a long day for all of you.

Not even Dean’s driving was as reckless as usual, which only confirmed your words since the man drove thinking he had six lives. “Don’t threaten me with a good time.” He joked, catching your eyes in the rearview mirror.

“Cut it.” Bucky muttered, his irritation quite evident.

“Jealous?” Dean teased, only to gain a deadly glare from Bucky. “Don’t worry man, I have my eyes on someone else.”

“Who gives a fuck. Just shut it.” Bucky grumbled, getting more comfortable in his seat and closing his eyes. At the view, you were embarrassed to admit that you almost couldn’t look away - he looked angelic, at peace, and for some reason that made your heart flutter.

You needed to have a fucking grip on yourself and remember who he was. For God’s sake.

“You okay, Sam?” You then asked, noticing how his leg was bouncing up and down. He sat in the passenger’s seat, lost in his thoughts, his gaze fixed on the scenery outside of the window. You couldn’t help but wonder if he was still processing what you had confessed earlier, considering his job was to literally hunt your kind and other things.

“I can’t stop thinking about this situation.” Sam sighed, concerned. “There are a hundred things I don’t understand. Like… how can a woman like that keep a Wendigo locked in a room as if it was just a wild animal? She’s not mentally stable enough to do that, and that thing should have ripped her apart in seconds - instead, Mrs Miller feeds that. I saw - I saw her dismembering someone when me and Dean broke into her house, how can she do that? She may be crazy, but not strong enough to kill someone and drag the body around like it weighs nothing. Maybe she has someone doing the dirty work for her.”

“She may. Also, why didn’t it eat her? Not only did the thing not rip her apart, but it keeps not doing that.” Bucky inquired. “Did she domesticated it or something?”

“I was wondering that, too.” Dean sighed, stopping the car momentarily at a red light. “The Wendigo works alone, and they prefer alive preys. It just doesn’t make sense.”

“We’ll figure something out tomorrow, with a clear head.” You said. “But I do have a question for you two: how did Fury find you? I didn’t know he knew about all of this.”

“Oh, he knows everything about it.” Dean confessed, leaving you both you and Bucky perplexed. “What? You’re telling me you find that weird? Or did you really think Fury and his team only dealt with aliens and Hydra?” He chuckled. “The man has connections everywhere, even with hunters. The Avengers think about global threats, we think about local threats.”

“But… how? He never told me that.” You looked at Bucky. “Did you know?”

“No.” He answered, and he seemed honest.

“How do you think Fury found you when you were with Hydra?” Sam asked you.

“I figured he… found some leads that led to my facility?” You answered, uncertain.

“It wasn’t Fury who found you.” Dean corrected you. “It was my father. He was following the steps of a Wendigo, a female, when he found out the place you were being kept at. He proceeded to tell Fury… and here you are.”

“I feel my brain burning.” You rubbed your eyes, trying to process everything - but your mind just didn’t want to work anymore. “I’ll have a talk with Fury as soon as I can, when this is over. For now, I just want to find out where Adam Barlow lives so maybe he can tell us something more about Cassandra. This situation is getting weirder by the second.”

But you should have known better than to harbor hopes.

“What the f- hello!” Dean smiled, rolling down the window as a police officer signaled for him to slow down.

“Hello.” The police officer replied, holding up a picture of a man you had never seen before - not that you could see much from the backseat. “Have you seen this man?”

“No, sir.” Dean shook his head. “Why?”

“This is Adam Barlow and he’s been reported missing. If you have any news, please let us know.”

…

That had to be a joke.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x oc #bucky x oc #bucky x reader #bucky x you #dean winchester #james bucky barnes #sam winchester #supernatural #bucky bar ws #james buchanan barnes #bucky fanfic #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky x female reader #bucky x y/n #marvel #winter soldier #mcu #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x yn #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x original female character

[ms--lobotomy]

Ok. Listen. I know I need to write that Konrad fic but Kesh is so fine and I want her so badly. Decisions...

#ms lobotomy speaks #i also need to work on finals and this project that i have going #not going to tell y'all about the project though. itll probably give away my secret identity #sorry #as much as i want to yap about it i can't

[bulkhummus]

mark your calendars chickpeas! i will be opening my commissions in a week!

so if you having been wanting something or want to help support me in my endeavors of life and hope and love and friendship keep that thought in your brain!

#they never technically closed but i just haven't been advertising #so I will make a fresh new post and pin it with info #im going to finally address the Patreon situation too and just unlist it for now and make a post #in the coming week though after im done with work #commissions #I just finally have the bandwidth to deal with this stuff #I also want to remake my website and put all my stuff there but I struggle bc I want to remain anonymous but also use it for teaching and #what not #so im not sure what to do on that front bc I SHOULD have a about page but... ugh you know? #ill figure that out this summer #all artist related things happening NOW #(after all my final projects are done) #I cant believe im so close to having a graduate degree #so funny #personal #oh I also need to update my ko-fi #that will be helpful too

[hxhhasmysoul]

wouldn't it be nice if the author of the fics finished them. the author is me.

#vent #for the last 4 months my life has been in stupid crisis mode #like constantly #from major ones where i had to move out for a while because it was impossible to stay where i lived #to not being able to use my kitchen for over a week #and like other more or less minor house related stuff that made it impossible for me to use something normally #not a single week without something like that or shit at work which is constantly being so fucking chaotic #and now someone died in my family #not someone very close but i liked them #and of course like feeling sad that they are gone can't be the only thing #because it has to come with the headache of i need to travel for their funeral and it's just before easter #so there's no one in this city to leave my dog with #because most of my friends either live abroad or have cats or are busy before easter.. #i'd just want a week where nothing happens #and like the writing is weighing heavy on me #because i miss it #also i wish i could finish something #i wish something good would happen that i could feel proud off #also because i'm mentally ill and fucking stupid when i was going crazy with my kitchen not working and work shit #i bought new furniture #because after 15 years i've finally had enough money to buy some that aren't fucking black and inconvenient and ugly #which is like a huge project and a crisis i brought onto myself #just because i was too burnt out to write #and i wanted something nice to happen to me #like a nice living space that doesn't make feel like i have no ownership over it because everything in it was some else's choice #and that old furniture was bought by my mother and my brother ages ago and it's handmedowns #and my fucking horrible mother feels personally slighted that i want to get rid of a bed that is broken #because my brother's kids jumped on it regularly when they used to visit pre covid #yeah it's been broken that long because i lost all my savings during covid and had to change careers to a souless pointless corpo job #long pathetic whine and overshare over

[miodiodavinci]

the burnout is real lads . . . . .

#which is to say that i came home and just stared at the wall for roughly 2 hours instead of completing my documents #it was at least validating to get to talk to one of my coworkers today #and hear that they're just as burnt out as i am #and usually have to sit in the parking lot for 4 to 5 minutes before they come in because they just don't want to be here that badly #and it feels hard to admit because this is typically thought of as a passion driven profession #and it's like #neither of us have lost the passion for it??? #it's not that we hate our jobs #it's just that we both feel like. we're putting in increasingly more effort week by week but we're just. #no longer getting results. #i mentioned how i feel like my faith in my ability to do this kind of work has just plummeted to zero #not at all helped by my mentor constantly pushing me to go faster and faster but then getting mad when my presentations go poorly #because i went faster or reduced the amount of material or cut the Q and A section down 10 minutes #i just feel . . . . . tired . . . . . . . . . . . #i still need to write three planning documents for tonight #one of which needs to be Really Good because my direct supervisor will be looking at it #but my god #i just want to sleep for three days straight and then stare at a wall for another three #i'm so close to the end though . . . . . #just another 15 of these documents (including the three from tonight) and that about covers my internship #of course then there's also the seminar work and the group project and all the fancy official employment documents #and. the portfolio project (a man screams in agony) #but god . . . . . . . . #so close . . . . . . . . #so close . . . . . . #once i'm free from the portfolio it's back to zola work and THEN . . . . . . . . . . #i can finally have a substantial mental health break for the first time since last may ;;; _____ ;;;

[wymgreenteam]

wip wtuesday

as the worst season of academia befalls us (finals) and i have to hide in my cave (the studio) for the next couple weeks in order to make it through, here's a little wip update :) these are short excerpts from the five fics currently filed under my "working" folder, in no particular order:

second hand heart — girldad nico au (or: recently put on ltir captain of the new jersey devils jack hughes accidentally gets roped into babysitting au)

hallmark au — currently untitled holiday vacation resort au where jack is the owner of this cute little cabin getaway and nico's an exec who's in desperate need of some r&r... this is basically just a quest to see how many hallmark tropes i can smush into one fic (answer? a lot.)

time loop au — currently untitled twist on a time loop au... :)

certain as the sun — beauty and the beast/swan lake fusion au... fantasy and magic and stuck in close quarters with rising tensions (and stakes)! oh my!

natural causes — you know how jack and nico both went on ir at the same time for a bit? yeah. i have nothing else to say for myself here.

#the number and selection of fics in my 'working' folder changes on a bi-weekly basis depending on mood #i have like 50+ ideas hanging around my docs and what i'm actively working on changes frequently #HOWEVER. i've become very emotionally attached to three of these and they're likely to be the next fics i post (likely in the new year) #bc the other two need extensive work/rework and are a little frustrating for me at the moment so they're on the back burner #also i refuse to ever celebrate wip wednesday and i know it's still tuesday somewhere rn so that's what we're going with #anyway yeah #don't expect much from me for a few weeks as i trudge through the trenches (finish final projects) and fight on the front lines (take exams #lil.snippets

[quemirabobo]

I just realized that I've been putting too much on my plate lately and instead of getting some of that shit done all I end up with is feeling sick every week and things keep accumulating and I stress myself ten times more and I end up doing nothing, reading something to distract myself of the fucking titanic quest I put my ass on

#i want to graduate so fucking much but i need to take so many finals for that and i need a good job because i can't afford my almost 200k #meds without a good medical insurance and i need to take as many finals i can while i have this more chill job but I'm taking 2 classes that #just require time but i also have to deal with it's deadlines and i have 2 investigation projects going on and i want to make a paper with #my friend and it would fit so perfectly with the Complutense meeting we want to be part of but it's deadline is the day after my final so i #have to give it a shape before that so our professor can gave it a look and tell us if it's ok BUT I'm feeling like shit and I'm on bed s #since yesterday because my ovary might have some cyst going on and it's painful like shit but my lab it's going to be ready next monday #so i have to wait until then and i need to call my insurance to talk about money because the only gynecologist who treat me like a human #doesn't work with my insurance anymore so i have to pay for her but i want to know how much they'll cover and then i have to make an #appointment with her AND I also feel tired and have slight fever that comes and goes and i might have some autoimmune shit going on too #and those lab are ready for the 16 and I've been calling all afternoon to make another tests but no one does it and i should be studying and #reading for the paper #and my room looks like a storm broke in and i need to clean it so i can use my fucking desk to study‚ read and search for fucking jobs #I'm at my fucking limit #not to mention how i go onboard of any project or volunteer work i come across #chronicles of Yu's life

[carcarrot]

well everyone now that sparkstember is over i can now devote my energy to being insane in other still sparks-related ways

#planning my next projects #on the one hand glad to not have to get a whole video done in the span of like 2 hours every day #on the other hand it was a fun creative challenge that gave me a sense of purpose. it was fun #but i need to keep myself busy as we descend into winter and ✨seasonal depression✨ #if i dont get it done today over the next couple days im going to make something silly for goofball's upcoming birthday #and then once that's done i dont know. i want to get back to work on my screenplay and try to FINISH IT!! but idk how long that'll take #i also have to finally finish watching that film course i bought oops. maybe ill start it over #and then????????? #i have a vague Idea of a possible short film i could make. that would also be like a kind of prequel to my Main Film Idea #and its something i could actually reasonably do as a short film and its not like insanely big budget like every other idea i have is #and I'm debating abt emailing my old film teacher and being like heyyyyy maybe you could help me make this short film???? #but id want to have this idea way more planned out and written before then. but OUGH WRITING ANOTHER SCREENPLAY??? #WHEN I HAVEN'T EVEN FINISHED MY FIRST ONE??? sigh. #the road to making my Big Great Movie is long and arduous. will we get there. who knows #oh also debating abt writing a letter to those silly guys. but i don't knowwwww #OH lmao i keep forgetting to mention i finally got my passport (it actually came earlier than expected) #so like. goodbye everyone im heading to the sydney opera house on halloween (JOKE i am not that insane. but i wish i could)

[ask-haruka-sawamura]

Hi everybody!! I'm so glad you guys seem to be excited for this!! I've already gotten a lot of submissions so far ⟨(0o0)/

Unfortunately, I made this blog in a very busy season at my school... I have a bit too much homework to respond quickly for now. I promised Uncle Kaz I wouldn't let this distract me too much. I guess I didn't plan that well... oops. _(>.<)_ But I'm looking forward to going through them when I get the chance!! I'll try not to keep you all hanging for too long, okay? Oh, and don't feel like you have to stop sending things in in the meantime. I'll be fine!!

Thank you so much everyone, and I hope you have a good day!! <3

#one of my favorite things about this blog so far has been making up my own (°v°) type emoticons bc i never use them #but i feel like she would love them #also i think maybe i'll break character in the tags? that seems alright i think #anyway yeah oops i started this like Immediately before all of the pre-finals projects are due. like i have 3 presentations this week 😬😬😬 #agony. we'll be fine though. anyway again thank you all for your interaction!! i was kinda worried this wouldn't take off at all #also to the anon who pointed out the issue with the banner: im working on a response. im going to change it #and i wanted to address it properly but im not sure i'll have time for a couple of days. but it Does matter to me #and i'll talk about it more explicitly and at greater length then. genuinely thank you for pointing it out to me #i wanna make things right. i just need a minute so i don't like. fail my classes #i'll try to get to it tonight. thanks again

[kellystar321]

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#periodical life updates #(<- NUMBER 3!!!) I FINISHED THE ANIMATION AND EVERYTHING FOR THAT PROJECT AND SENT IT OFF! super excited!! #it looks really cute! i tried my best and im mostly satisfied of where i landed <33 #it's my little sibling's birthday today!! it's also the first official meeting of lgbt club!! (the other event was a fun lgbt mixer) #my backpack smells bad. like mildew or mold maybe? urgh its awful and gives me a headache. i might need a new one. i dont know. urghhh. #my programming homework is due today!! yike!! but other than that my personal projects with deadlines are all done! #INIQUITY NOW THAT YOU HAVE TIME ARE YOU FINALLY GONNA WORK ON YOUR SELF SHIP BLOG?? YES!! HOPEFULLY!! #truthfully i /have/ been working on it on the side. it looks decent but the colors;;; i have always been pretty sht at color picking? #i can adjust with filters but without that im like. a little not good yet lmao. gotta do some studies sometime perhaps #BUT YAY EXCITED!! ive got some rambles and doodles and a tag system and f/o info which is extremely cumbersome (affectionate)!! #also i have new fandom ocs for the latest dimension 20 campaign and im so delighted heho <33 this campaign is literally so fun. #im watching it with my sibling when its done!! OOH ALSO I FIGURED OUT HOW TO PNGTUBE AND i will likely never use it BUT COOL!! #i dont like. talk. lmao. my art streams are 1) silent 2) rare 3) only shared with my siblings. pngtuber is a little useless. but CUTE!! #i got boba tea yesterday!! sandy bought it :3 <3 and we're having pho and cheesecake later and i might plan out a little excursion today? #like i might get a treatsie. OR i'll just sit on campus as usual and get a mango smoothie and draw for a while (or work on homework.) #(lets be honest its likely the former. i might get a little back into traditional? ooh or maybe i'll practice my asl?) HEY THOUGH. #ive been thinking about making a henrey stickmn (ask)blog to practice asl? like. no plot. just henry teaching ellie and charles asl #really funny considering my Real concept of an askblog for THSC. not ace or eca; but a secret third thing (⛎) ;) #then again since when have i EVER followed through on an askblog lmao?? damb im all over the place today. we're already hitting tag limit #okay!! 3 AM!! if im going early tomorrow i gotta eep! goodnight everyone i love you!! see you tomorrow if i have the energy and time!!

[ohbutwheresyourheart]

girlies I'm losing my mind.

#personal #vent #oh my goddddd #i thought my coworker and i were finally making decent progress on our project #that we have to present on THURSDAY MORNING #and this is the biggest project we need to do twice a year #only to find. at five fucking pm today. that she had not informed me we are resourcing two of our biggest fabric programs to a new supplier #which supplier? don't know #just know it's not going to be the one I've been planning for #and that the fabric program i DID want to resource #and had SPOKEN TO HER ABOUT TODAY #cannot go to the supplier I pencilled it in as #i don't know if she didn't know herself or just forgot or didn't care or didn't understand or what #for fuck's sake this is your job to know this stuff #don't just sit there looking gormless while i have to find out from YOUR BOSS #who then speaks to me in the most patronizing manner possible as she tells me she can't do my job for me #like motherfucker i just. need. correct. information. jesus christ. #also shout out to the big boss who last week was like tell me if you have any scheduling concerns guys!!! #and then when i told her today i have scheduling concerns because. uh. the fucking project is not going. anywhere. at this rate. #get told oh no sorry we can't do any schedule moves you can figure it out #like???? what???? was the point????? of asking us to come to you???? #this is such a prolific fucking issue in my workplace and it drives me nuts #it's like management have heard these trite phrases on a managing people skills course somewhere #and not realised you need to back it up. with actual. actions. #also my manager whomst i loved is now on maternity leave and her replacement is someone i've worked with previously and. hm. suffice to say #she has not changed one bit #in regards to her complete inability to stand up for her team #i'm sure she has her good points but she's as supportive as a fucking wet paper towel #ignoring me trying to set boundaries on my time #but making sure SHE leaves on time for school pickup

[emily-mooon]

Sometimes I just feel like writing a fic where chapters are episodic and I don’t have to elongate an event cause I finished it in one chapter.

And this is where I pull out a fake presentation talking about a 1930s Jancy au that is a slow burn friends to lovers where they get into weird situations and go on adventures like it’s a book written by L.M. Montgomery and has a similar energy to Little Women.

#ok I have to admit that I am horrible at writing about one event for too long #when I was in my creative writing class I noticed when writing a book for my final project that I could write one paragraph for each chapter #I was unable to write a chapter that was multiple pages #because of this I think that writing something more episodic would be good for me to write becuase then I’ll probably finish it #I think I’m also much better at writing things that are short and sweet and get straight to the point #I love all of my other au ideas that I have or want to put into fics but I think I need to start writing in a zone that I’m comfortable with #and not dive head first into something I need to work on more #so I’m going to start plotting out the first few chapters for this fic tonight and start writing tomorrow #give myself a bit of a break from drawing and allow myself to get back into writing #in way that works for me and my rollercoaster of ideas of a brain #sorry for the wall of text here in the tags and if you read them I hope you are all doing well and for those of you going back to school #or are already back I wish you good luck on your studies #btw all my other fic ideas will be written and turned into a fic or finished at some point #I don’t know when but they will be when I feel like I’m ready to dive in #(and also when I get a grasp on how to plot better with the dumb plot triangle)