#hot lady with one braincell

[obssessivethorn]

Yuu Makes Constant References No One Else Gets

Since I started playing Twst Wonderland, I can’t help but imagine Yuu starting out by constantly making references to pop culture and memes from their world only to realize midway through that no one else around them will understand it 

Just imagine: 

In the early stages of the game, Yuu starts to gradually feel more comfortable around their friends, mainly Ace, Deuce, and Grim

At first, they slowly start to feel at home again 

They’d begin loosening up and speaking more like how they would in their home world 

In this case, that means more references and obscure humor 

Especially if we’re basing Yuu’s home world on our current day world

There are so many intricate inside jokes on the internet that wouldn’t make an ounce of sense to anyone who has never been exposed to that kind of environment like we have 

So, when Yuu first made an obscure reference in a conversation with the Single Braincell Gang™, they fall back into their closed off space

Because they’re not from here 

They have a whole other world to get back to 

If they can even get back to it 

And while Ace and Deuce may not be the brightest, the two had gotten to know Yuu enough to know that something was off with them. They just couldn’t place what

After the first few slip ups, Yuu had started talking less and less

They started letting Grim speak for the both of them more often, only speaking when others addressed them or when it was about a topic concerning Twisted Wonderland

From an outside point of view, nothing seemed to have changed. They still hung out with the other first years, laughed and teased their friends, and regularly asked or answered questions in class

But those closer to the Ramshackle prefect could sense the hesitation whenever they were about to say something 

“You should have seen Crewel’s face when Deucey asked that question!” Ace recounted the event between fits of laughter.  Yuu sat with the other first years at their (unspokenly claimed) lunch table, happily chuckling at their boys’ antics. They held Grim in their lap, being used as his personal high-chair like usual, subconsciously running one of their hands through the monster’s soft fur and munching on their own sandwich with the other.  “I wouldn’t have asked such a stupid question if I wasn’t so tired from you keeping me up all night with your complaining about that test we have today!” Deuce retorted, grumpily taking another bite of his egg noodles. Though he looked away from his friends, the flustered blush on his cheeks was still easily seen by the group.  The prefect let out another giggle, “I swear, Crewel looked exactly like that one meme with the lady surrounded by all those different equations-!”  “Huh? Is that a new one I haven’t seen?” Epel asked, his head cocked to the side in question. Had it been any other situation, Yuu might have found it cute. But their embarrassment was too strong for any thought like that to surface.  “Ah-! Nevermind, sorry. It’s an old meme from my home world.” They let out an awkward laugh before looking down and stuffing another bite of their sandwich into their mouth. Their face felt hot and they wished for nothing more than the floor to open up and swallow them, never to be seen in Twisted Wonderland again.  “Y-yeah, and then Crewel assigned Juice like, a hundred more pages of homework to make sure he understood the topic!” Quickly, Ace diverted the others’ attention back to him, no doubt after sending a look of pity to the prefect.  “Hundre-! It was only ten!” Deuce exclaimed, mouth full of pasta.  Yuu could only mentally thank Ace for saving them from the piteous stares from the others. It was no secret that home was a sore subject for the prefect. Any time they spoke about it, their eyes would glaze over with nostalgic longing. Ace and Deuce would often ask them about traditions or cultures back in their world, both out of interest and because the two knew Yuu loved telling them about it. 

Other times, however, aren’t grim reminders of how Crowley isn’t actually looking for a way home

Instead, they have these little moments with themself where they make references to things from their home world as an inside joke

Even if they don’t understand, Yuu’s friends still notice the tiny smirks or held laughs on occasion

But they’d never say anything about it, because it’s obvious how the small joke grounds Yuu and comforts them with the familiarity 

“C’mon! We’re all in this together!” Yuu hastily spouted, trying to stop Ace from running away from his cleaning duties, again. Before Ace could even respond, the prefect immediately let out a bout of laughter and grabbed the boy’s arm, yanking him down the hall while humming a song he’d never heard before between occasional giggles.

Yuu starts recording Grim who is knocked out on their bed. Light snores come from the fluffball. Yuu is heard sniffling behind the camera. “Oh meow meow get up,” they croak. Their hand comes up to lightly shake Grim, stirring him awake and now very confused. “Oh shit meow meow, I thought you was dead-,” Yuu giggles out, further confusing a very dazed Grim

“C’mon, Yuu, the question’s not that bad!” Epel said in between laughs.  “Yeah, Yuu! It’s just three more of these!” Ace could barely get the words out as he slowly collapsed in silent laughter. He slid further down in the library chair he occupied, hand clasping his chest in an effort to breathe yet still remain quiet.  “No, I’ve had it! I am disgusted!” Yuu continued to furiously pack their materials. “I am revolted!” They fumble in closing their notebook and quickly give up, letting the papers crumple up as they shove it into their bag. “I dedicate my entire life to our lord and savior Jesus Christ, and this is the thanks I get?”  The rest of the first years watch as Yuu slings their bag over their shoulder and promptly makes their way out of the library. Ace practically gasps for air. Epel finds himself in a giggle fit, unable to stop. Deuce is a mixture of confusion, amusement, and horror while he very obviously is still processing what just happened. Sebek can only look surprised, unsure of how to proceed. And finally, Jack is just as surprised but is holding back his own chuckles that threaten to spill. 

“Ace, you idiot! There’s a ‘b’ in ‘subtle’.” Deuce scolded. “What?! Where’s the ‘b’?”  “There’s a bee?” Yuu’s quivering voice quietly broke the tension. “Yuu!”

“Whoa, Yuu, I honestly didn’t know you could do that!” Yuu looked at him with a deadpan expression bordering on offended. ”Do you think I fuck around?”  (definitely more obscure but if you understand this i love you) ((Hint: Brennen Lee Mulligan in a Game Changer episode))

Any g-note plays and Yuu’s eyes widen in recognition

“Floyd, Jamil, Ace. You guys gotta get your head in the game.” 

Whether you wish to view it as romantic or platonic, the fact in undeniable that the cast is weak to hearing and seeing Yuu ramble on about things back from their world, specifically the first years or Heartslabyul boys

I personally really like the headcannon that only really the Heartslabyul boys, and maybe the rest of the first years, are in on Yuu being from a different world. It makes certain moments hurt just a bit more with the idea of little to no one knowing that Yuu is meant to inevitably leave. But i digress

Yuu could just be reminded of their favorite dish back home or a song they were obsessed with when they were younger, but the way they talk about it is mesmerizing to the boys. Their eyes light up with an aching mixture of nostalgia, longing, and joy. Recounting old stories or stupid trends they participated in never fails to crack just the slightest bit of a smile on their lips. 

For some odd reason, the way they describe their home world feels like taking a sip of a warm drink on a cold winter day. Comforting in all the right ways. Warming you from the inside despite the harsh environment surrounding. 

Not only does Yuu make it all sound like a fantasy at times, which is technically true given it’s a different world/dimension, but they somehow give the boy a strange glimmer of hope too. Like they too will have a chance to visit and experience the same joys. Only, there’s no chance of that happening. Right? 

#twisted wonderland angst #twisted wonderland #twst headcanons #twst #twst angst #yuu/mc (twisted wonderland) #yuu angst #twst crowley #grim twisted wonderland #ace twisted wonderland #ace trappola #duece spade #twst x reader #twst deuce #dire crowley #epel felmier #twst epel #sebek zigvolt #twst sebek #jack howl

[hotvintagepoll]

This is a three-way poll. Only one of these men will continue to the second round of the bracket.

Propaganda

Dean Martin (My Friend Irma, Rio Bravo)—No propaganda submitted

Sean Connery (Dr. No, From Russia with Love, Marnie)—no propaganda submitted

Jeremy Brett (My Fair Lady)—he's such a himbo sunshine boy in my fair lady <3 later on he gets dark and brooding as sherlock holmes but right now he's just a dumb little summer child with no braincells <3

This is round 1 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.

#dean martin #sean connery #jeremy brett #the rat pack #james bond #round 1 #hotvintagepoll #old hollywood

[mountedeverest]

Fuck it Friday

Buck x Tommy Drabble 7x06 spec T (sorta)

A little tease! I've been reading the interviews, especially Lou's where he says he makes a "dramatic entrance" at Madney's wedding, and this is what I had in mind!! Rest of drabble under cut. Enjoy ! Tags ✨ @tizniz LMK if you'd like to be added/removed

"Who's that? Bringing in the groom?"

Somewhere off to Buck's side, some lady is pointing up at the sky. As the whipping sound of blades gets increasingly louder, Buck turns just in time to see the bird closing in, a worse-for-wear but alive Chim on it's passenger side waving at the wedding guests below.

Buck smiles.

"That would be my boyfriend."

The helicopter touches down on the patch of grass they had just cleared. The blades start winding down and Hen, ever the Best Woman, runs up to Chim who looks like he's just about to keel over. It doesn't take too long for Tommy to make his way out and around the chopper to join the other guests, but just as he emerges, Buck sees him, and he is not looking respectfully.

The suit Tommy's wearing is fitted. The first few buttons on his dress shirt are undone and his hair doesn't seem to have product, which means it's curly and moving with the wind. He's wearing his pilot sunglasses like he's out of fucking Top Gun.

Buck goes weak in the knees a little. Tommy is so cool.

What's more, when Tommy clocks him, he cracks the widest smile at Buck, all sunshine and puppy dogs. His nose scrunches up.

Buck practically runs to meet him halfway, and Tommy only has time to remove his sunglasses before Buck takes a hold of Tommy's face with both hands and crashes his whole mouth against his, full tongue. It is not a gentle kiss.

Never mind that Buck was supposed to soft launch his boyfriend.

Never mind that he'd only told a select few that he was out.

Never mind that they were currently very surrounded, by many people who knew them both yet were unaware of the new developpments.

Tommy goes with it, not necessarily one for extreme PDA, but his hands - huge, huge hands - wrap around Buck's sides to his lower back, gently stabilizing them both.

When they break apart for air after what could be qualified as a long time for a kiss, Tommy has this bewildered look on his face, like he'd just been hit in the face with something. In a sense, he had.

"You are... happy to see me?" Tommy's not really asking, more like he's trying to unscramble his brain after all of his braincells tragically died with the force impact of Buck's mind-numbing kiss.

"That was so, so hot." Buck grits through his teeth, cute aggression on full as his fingers twist in the short hair at the back of Tommy's head. "I'm not well."

"Down, boy." Tommy chuckles nervously, soothing Buck with a hand on his chest. He smiles coyly. "If you're good during the ceremony, maybe we can uh, find a less public place later to say hello."

If this was a cartoon, steam would come out of Buck's ears and nostrils, his heart would beat out of his chest, or he'd just explode. Real life comes close though, because Buck can feel himself flush all the way down to his toes. If his knees were a lil weak before, well, they're giving out now.

"Woah there!" Tommy catches him and keeps him upright as Buck finds his footing.

"This is what you do to me, Tommy." Buck says back in a somewhat strangled, accusatory tone.

Tommy only chortles, as he guides them towards the alley where, hopefully, there was gonna be a wedding soon.

#911 spoilers #911 abc #fanfiction #evan buckley #buck x tommy #bucktommy #kinley #can we just settle on a ship name already #tommy kinard #7x06 #7x06 spec

[kneelingshadowsalome]

I know König tries so hard to get feral cat lady to like him again. Gifts left outside her door, staring at her from afar as she goes about her day unbothered by the lack of human interaction. Maybe Konigs braincells finally rub together to form a coherent thought outside of his norm and he leaves her a gift related to one of her many hobbies. And this time, during one of his longing stares, she finally meets his gaze with just a slightly softer look.

She seems to like the flowers well enough because they always disappear from in front of her door – of course they may simply end up in the trash too, how could he know? – but he ends up bringing them to her anyway in hopes of one day winning back her heart.

She likes to draw and paint and so one day he goes to an art store and after 15 minutes of fevered decision-making, gets her some black ink and an old style fountain pen. He pairs the gift with a large sunflower he stole from a farmer's field, and to his delight, all his offerings have disappeared next time he passes by her door.

But next day when he opens his door, there's a gift waiting for him. He almost steps on it before noticing it. No one's ever done that, he only got birthday presents from his Oma back in Austria when he was a child, and it isn't even his birthday yet, just a regular Tuesday... But there's no mistaking the scroll in front of his feet; it's even tied with a cute, red ribbon.

And when he opens it, he sees himself: his hood, his eyes, his shoulders – he feels hot in the cheeks because she's exaggerated, they can't be that wide – perfectly captured there on the thick parchment with black ink. His heart can barely take it; she's even named the piece as 'King'.

Some instinct tells him to turn it around and check the backside and fair enough: there's a little message for him there.

"I know you stole that flower. Take me there at six."

#answered #yandere könig

[screaminglygay]

third time is a charm, right? (part two)

pairing: natasha romanoff x fem!reader, wanda maximoff x fem!reader, natasha romanoff x wanda maximoff (in this part there is mostly natasha!)

summary: you finally work up the courage to call the phone number you got yesterday.

warnings: again some swearing

word count: 1k

an: heyy lovely people! thank youuuuu so much for all the support! it means truly a lot! 💕💕 i hope you will like this part as well! if there is anything special you´d like to read, let me know! 💕

(italica = your thoughts)

Should I call them? I mean they gave me their number for a reason. I should. I have to. I want to, but what should I say?

“Hi, it´s me your waitress! No. Hello, so I'm calling, because you gave me your number.” You let out a big sigh as you take your phone and look at the time.  

10:27

You really spent over 40 minutes walking in your apartment back and forth, trying to figure out what you will say to the couple. Going to the kitchen for a cold glass of water seemed like a good idea for your brain to calm down. After almost drowning yourself, you picked up the phone one more time and dial the number from the business card. Before you clicked “call” you prayed to every single gay person you know to give you the strength of not being cringy.  

It´s ringing. One time. Two times.

“I wondered when you're going to call, darling.” you heard the captivating rasp again. The voice of a goddess herself. Her raspy voice was such a unique melody to your ears, that it would easily make you do whatever she wants. At that moment you felt like you had the biggest privilege just from hearing her voice.

“You still there?” If you would listen little closer, you could definitely hear the smirk on the face of the lady on the other end of the call.

“Yes, yeah! Hi, hello! Um how did you know it is me?” you start to fidget with the ring on your finger. Even though you're completely alone, you're still trying to hide the fact that you're nervous. Mostly for yourself, fake it till you make it, right? But how can you? When you're on the line with one of the most attractive people in the entire universe.

“I gave you my personal number. I think that its way easier to get to know each other, don´t you think?” she let out a chuckle.

“Sure!” You put your ring back on your finger as you start to walk around the room.

Sure? Oh my god, there is hot woman on the phone and you say SURE?! Say something less cringy! Fuck, think!  

“My name is (Y/N) by the way!” you quickly announced.

“Nice to meet you, (Y/N). Such a pretty name, for such a pretty girl. I'm Natasha, but I think you already know that.” You're hearing the flirtatious spark in her voice that automatically sends shivers down to your stomach. You don’t even notice, but after that little compliment from her, you're smiling like a little girl and your cheeks turn red faster than popping champagne at a bar.

“Thanks...” you let out a small giggle, that were caught on the other side. “I uh I did kinda figured it out your names.” a little proud smile on your face could have been seen if the woman was in the same room as you.

“Not just pretty, but also smart, how perfect.” she thinks out loud.

Gosh this flirting is not good for my one and only gay braincell.

“Uh um where is Wanda?” you curiously ask.

“Oh darling, we only just start to talk to each other and you're already asking for Wanda? How cruel...” you can hear some movement in the background, but you don’t pay much attention to it.

“Oh no! Shit. Sorry! I didn’t mean it like that, I just thought that you two were... are a couple?” you mumble not knowing if you're actually asking or just letting your thoughts out loud.

You can hear not so subtle chuckle, that the woman let out.

“We are a couple...” she stopped talking for a few seconds and you look on your phone to make sure you're two are still having a phone call. You are, so you put your phone back on your ear. You can hear her humming to something and then she starts to talk again. “... how about we talk about this in person?” her voice sounds darker than it did before, and you love it.

“Sure! Yeah! Absolutely, alright! I'm free almost all the time.” your cheeks hurt from all of the smiling you did today.  

“So, you don’t have another shift at the pub?” This teasing joke from her made you more lose, and it felt like all the nerves just vanished. You shake your head and giggle at her words.

“Nope. I don’t really have any shifts left there, onetime thing, you know?” She saw right through you, but you didn’t care at all.  

“Okay, good.” Her chuckle was something you wanted to listen all day long. “Then how about tonight at Mikey´s coffee shop, does 6pm sounds good?” she suggested.

You nod, realizing she can't see you. “Yes, that sounds perfect.” you add and smile again.

“Perfect...” she repeated after you. “And don’t worry, Wanda will be there as well, she can´t wait and me neither.” now it´s her time to smile like a little girl. Sadly, you can't see that beautiful sight.

“Great! So, uh um I guess see you later, Natasha.” You finally said her name and it rolled off your tongue with effortless grace, as if it was natural. The ease with which her name slipped from your mouth was like the instant connection you two felt at the same time. The sparks again. You felt it and she did definitely too.

“See you later, (Y/N).” You could listen to her voice forever but listen to her say your name was something else. Something that cast a spell on you, as you still stood in your living room, even after the call has ended. The texture of her voice is still in your head. The subtle roughness seemed to dance upon the eardrums, leaving an impression that it could hardly be described.

You look around and giggle like a small child having its first ice cream. Maybe you're very thankful to Kayla for not showing up. Actually, you're definitely thankful.

And maybe this is a really nice start for something new? Something exciting and something that you truly deserve after such a long time.

(again, thank you for all the support!<333)

taglist: @arualdcg​ @beholdagaywriter​ @snowdrop1026​

#wanda x natasha #wanda maximoff x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #wanda maximoff #natasha romanoff #marvel fanfic #wlw #third time is a charm right? #adele writes

[knight-princess]

The way that Lili is fast becoming one of my favourite characters is delighting me because like. fuck yeah she is so character when you think about it. She’s basically a skeleton held together with goo and a love of drama. She was the victim before she was ever the villain. She wears the cool and pretty face to meet guests and dresses like a greek goddess. Her alias is “the crone” so naturally people (people being Kit; Airk nabbed the Tanthalos twin brain cell) hear that and go “pfft an old lady I could take her” and get clapped with “yeah no she’ll fuck your shit up she’s the most dangerous refuses to die motherfucker of this era we just picked the lamest sounding name don’t let that fool you tho”. She was a princess and her rescue went mad and murdered each other. She lures people in with the promise of being the third Harbinger this month (don’t worry bro it’ll stick this time we’re like 80% sure. 60% sure. maybe 45%. look the last few didn’t do so hot don’t worry about it embrace your power you’ll be amazingly evil) and the offer of death by intense dehydration or wyrm’s milk (oh my god why do they gotta describe it like that I’m with Kit on this one. bleh). Tries to seduce the prince the normal way and he just so happens to have the singular Tanthalos twin braincell right now sees through her to go “wait you’re evil aren’t you” and she’s just like “. . . yeh”. She presumably has a whole evil hobby makeover room somewhere fully stocked with freshly turned bad guy outfits and unsexy haircuts. Her boss is a worm. Gets dead via getting her chest blasted open at the hands of the Chosen one who believes in the power of love. Gets the line “he’s eternal, bitch”. What more do you want

#willow 2022 #lili of cashmere #the crone willow

[secret-engima]

*slaps table* hi. This is the post where I talk about, yet again, why Kishi is an idiot when it comes to the implications of his own worldbuilding. Point 1. being that Kishi’s insistence that peacetime is bad for shinobi business is hot garbage and point 2. being the implications of ANBU being Scary even to other shinobi. Because the show makes it clear that ANBU are supposed to be the Scary Ones, the Dark Ones who do messed up stuff. Many fics have already talked about this, but not *too* many I've seen actually explore the implications of what that actually MEANS when put in the context of a society who thinks it's A-okay to give a knives and bombs to literal kids and shoo them off to fight things. Buckle up I’m going to flex my logic center and start talking economics even tho I never studied economics outside casual worldbuilding interest.

Okay to start off with, I’m need to talk about Not Anbu for a hot minute and describe some of the few things we *do* know about Kishi’s “worldbuilding” of the shinobi villages and their history.

1. Literally everyone but Madara the Madman agrees that the villages are a Good Thing that happened, even the missing ninja never breathe a word about wanting to go back to the Warring States Era where everyone was in clans. The implications of this could honestly be it’s own entire rant but I will restrain myself and focus on the topic at hand for now.

2. Konoha and every village barring the trash fire that is pre-Boruto Kiri have a thriving enough economy to be literal *cities* of very decent size and decent quality of life, which the civilians have a major hand in I’m sure, but tellingly the shinobi *make enough income to get by* and seem to do so very easily. I will probably come back to this as I go on.

3. Ninja villages not only have a wide array of mission ranks (which I will also come back to) but they are the ones who set the prices for individual missions, not the employers. This is seen in the infamous Wave mission when the bridge builder fellow lied about the danger of the mission because he *could not afford to pay for a mission above a C-rank*, which I remind you is the second lowest mission ranking in the system.

Alright with those in mind I’m gonna talk about the “peacetime is bad for shinobi” garbage because that does actually relate directly to the worldbuilding implications of ANBU. Just. Just bear with me here and forgive me if this kinda rambles in multiple directions, talking about anything with Kishi makes my braincells run for the hills on a good day.

JUMPING IN WITH THE PEACETIME THING. This is stupid. This is one of the stupidest things to come out of Kishi’s mouth in my opinion barring the existence of the cannibal space aliens. Why? Because despite Kishi’s love of explosions and giant flashy fights shinobi are supposed. To be. STEALTHY. And the vast majority of them now live in villages, which means they need steady income.

Post the unification of the clans into villages, wars actually became too big and messy to be profitable because it’s during peacetime that people have money to spend on hiring ninja. And we see them spend it on incredibly frivolous things when it comes to shinobi. Just look at all the D-ranks we see or are referenced in the shows. Babysitting, pet retrieval, fence painting, carrying shopping bags for civilian ladies, house cleaning, the list goes on. And these pay well enough, are priced high enough by the village, that Might Dai, a single parent, was able to feed, shelter, and clothe both himself and an extremely energetic child while also having time to train himself and his son and walk Gai to and from school. And the price tag for missions only goes up from there. Higher ranked missions pay more according to risk, but peacetime is when people will be able to afford those kinds of missions. *Wartime*, as war is defined in the show post-village creation, are giant, messy affairs where a lot of manpower goes to maintaining front lines and countering enemy action, leaving far *less* manpower and time to take on these kinds of missions, and with the mass destruction of land and resources that these wars cause, people will have less money to throw at having the magic ninja men do things like escort caravans, deal with petty crime, retrieve stolen items, etc. And those examples are just C-rank/B-rank examples. Most wartime missions that we see in the show are actually missions assigned by the village itself, not from an outside client, which means the pay is coming from the Village coffers and not an external source, which can get messy very quickly if they do not have the manpower to take enough missions from outside clients to refill those coffers. Remember that I’m coming back to it later.

Wartime, for village ninja, is loud and messy and ugly. *Peacetime* on the other hand, is the playground of the rich, the powerful, and the *subtle*. Peacetime is when nobles pay top dollar to *flaunt* that they can afford to hire a ninja or three to escort them around in broad daylight regardless of any enemies they’ve made. Peacetime is when nobles have the money to pay for ninja to go in and spy on rivals or steal secrets. Peacetime is when the Daimyo and other elites hire shinobi to escort luxury goods at high risk of theft, to deal with underground human or drug trafficking that is inconveniencing them, or to spy on their neighboring lands for information that will become useful next time they meet up to flex on each other in a “you don’t want to make trouble with me I have and know X”.

More importantly, peacetime is when the *lower* classes can afford to pay for the magic ninja as well. If D-ranks are enough to support a single parent and his child, then C and B ranks are actually going to be the *backbone* of a ninja village’s economy, not the A or S ranks. C and B ranks are going to be the highest pay for the lowest risk, and those will predominantly come from the merchant and working class who have enough spare cash to have someone deal with the wild animals harming their livestock, take out budding trafficking rings and bandit gangs or escort people and goods.

     I don’t think I’m emphasizing this one enough. Look at a map of the Elemental Nations, look at the size of those countries. Now we don’t get a lot of info on cities in those countries (because KISHI) but there are bound to be plenty of villages, towns, and cities dotting those countries, and all of them are going to be connected in some way to each other via trade routes and highways. You’re going to have Konoha’s own supply lines and the trade deals they have with their own merchant families bargaining for preferential treatment in exchange for setting up shop in a ninja village on top of all the other merchants from all over the Land of Fire who, during peacetime, have both money and incentive to hire the fire-chucking magic people to ensure *all* of their goods arrive *on time, every time*.

You’re going to have merchants who have supply lines through multiple countries. Glass products from the Land of Wind. Inks, fine paper, and flavored teas from Land of Fire. Fish, oyster, and pearl products from the coast (which is especially high risk in areas near the disaster fire that is Kiri). Each and every country is going to have luxury products or famous higher-quality raw materials (*points at Iwa and their rock obsession, points at every product made out of high quality stone, silver, gold, or iron ore*) that the other countries are all going to want, and consequently you will have merchants that are going to be willing to pay top dollar to ensure those products get where they are meant to go and do so undamaged and in a timely fashion despite bad roads/bad weather/bandits/rogue shinobi hired by a competitor/wild animals/freak acts of the local kami because you forgot to pay tribute to their shrine last week.

The technology of pre-Boruto era is also still stuck in the *horse and wagon* stage, meaning you have caravans of this stuff moving on very strict, long term schedules, which means these are jobs that the village can charge per day or week on the road on top of the base price estimated from the level of risk to the shinobi. You have merchants who are going to give preferential treatment to the village of their home nation if they can, both because you Don’t Insult The Local Fire Breathers/Rock Gougers/Storm Summoners/Etc but also because the villages themselves likely offer discounts for natives of their country, or even contracts that are essentially subscription deals for those who have multiple caravans going out at the same time, multiple times in a year. A “pay this much up front and we will ensure that several shinobi are always on standby to guard one of your caravans” kinda deal. It’s been implied multiple times in the shows that the majority of any shinobi village’s workforce are chuunin and that jounin’s are elite, and C/B-ranks are literally stated in the wiki to be usually given to teams of Chuunin or sometimes two genin teams and their jounin pairing up for a joint operation. Chuunin are going to make their careers on guarding caravans, dealing with bandits, clearing road hazards, etc. If Chuunin are the majority of your workforce, then missions that chuunin can take are going to be, by necessity, the largest cashflow coming into your village.

If a war between two or more countries is happening, all of that gets heavily restricted because of the risk of infiltration, heavily impeded from road destruction and wartime front lines, or straight up *shut down* from lack of money and manpower to take those missions.

Can you see what I’m getting at now when I say Kishi’s peacetime line is stupid.

And here comes another fun aspect of this. Because where the money flows, so does the cultural norms. Now a lot of fics I’ve seen emphasize the child soldier thing and also how D-ranks are very likely a way to acclimate the genin to mission work while also training civilians to see ninja as Friendly Safe Workers who happen to have magic powers and knives. But the thing is, all of that work on acclimating the civilians to view their local shinobi as Safe To Hire is going to go out the window if you remind them too often that these people are literal killers for hire. Merchants are not going to want to hire Infamous Killers because that says to their customers and their potential business partners that they themselves are shady and possibly approve of murder to get their way. Poking at D-ranks briefly, farmers aren’t going to want to hire potentially unhinged murderers to till their fields, and nobody is going to want to hire even the genin to *babysit their kids*.

So.

In order to attract reliable patronage from these low risk, well paying areas, the ninja villages had to *alter their public perception*. Assassination missions, kidnapping missions, extortion missions, all of those over time became short-term gain/long-term loss for the village. So they took them on less and less, and those kinds of missions became increasingly *socially unacceptable* even to the shinobi, because if the village doesn’t approve of it, it’s not a good thing. What assassination/sabotage missions we do see or hear referenced in canon are always, iirc, targeting someone that can the ninja can safely point at and say “this is a bad guy”. High ranking rogue shinobi from other villages or crime lords or despotic warlords being I think the majority (if not the entirety) of the few examples canon gives us. Those are people that, when civilians hear about them being assassinated, the civilians are going to say “good riddance” rather than “oh no!”. And if those missions are the only ones that the common shinobi hear about themselves or take on, then that’s what they are going to associate with those types of missions. A high risk job that is nonetheless seen as Morally Right, even if their moral compass hinges mostly on who is the friend or enemy of their home village.

I could also get into how this has really interesting implications for what the Warring State Era shinobi economics were like and how Hashirama and Madara making Konoha was basically inventing the concept of unionizing but I’m not going to side track to that because finally, FINALLY, we get to the ANBU Are Scary Thing.

Because this. This whole thing about how peacetime is actually where ninja villages make their bread and butter and how the push-pull of being Socially Acceptable for Money turning into Actual Moral Perception is where ANBU’s identity as the Scary Guys comes into play.

Now we don’t know when ANBU was actually founded in Konoha or any other village, but I’m going to ballpark and say it was *after* the First War because of a few key things we know about ANBU.

1. ANBU are Scary.

2. ANBU are known to specifically hunt other ninja (specifically Kiri has a Hunter-nin branch of ANBU but logically every village would have this).

3. ANBU work is extremely psychologically and physically grueling to their members and has a high fatality rate.

4. Whatever ANBU does is considered messed up even by ninja standards. An example that comes to mind is a filler flashback where Gai ends up running into Kakashi on an ANBU mission where Kakashi is basically putting down enemy ninja that are defeated and attempting to surrender and Gai is visibly distressed by this.

The First Shinobi World War likely rocked the Elemental Nations as badly or *worse* than WWI did for the real world, because this was the first time “war” was not defined as two or three noble lords throwing peasants with spears or the occasional ninja at each other or two or three shinobi clans having a protracted blood feud that they could only initiate when they weren’t busy trying to feed their own families. Assuming Konoha has the average number of shinobi clans that can be found in a shinobi village, that means we had somewhere upward of 55 clans from various countries throwing everything they had at each other on open battlefields, destroying large amounts of landscape, and causing shinobi and civilian casualties on a mass scale that even the most fire happy Uchiha could not have achieved on their worst day. This was also after Jinchuuriki became a thing, so this war was the first demonstration of what it’s like to essentially duct tape a nuke to an emotionally volatile child soldier and see what happens when you throw two or more of them into a battlefield.

The economy of the villages and their respective nations would have been in chaos after the war. Entire towns, roads, and bridges are straight up gone, chunks of landscape for miles around have been drastically rewritten, the death toll is high and the missing persons list is even higher and in the wake of this you’re going to have *every* would-be warlord and their grandfather getting uppity and trying to stake a claim on what they can of the wreckage. This includes Rogue Shinobi, likely the first real appearance of Rogue Shinobi in ninja history, at least on this scale. Lots of shinobi are going to be disillusioned from the war, exhausted, more than a few are mentally broken from the traumas, and all the ninja who have no moral compasses and dreams of power are looking at this and deciding “hey, now is a great time to become a warlord”. On top of all this, since most of the wartime missions were assigned by the villages themselves and not an outside client (with *very minimal* cash flow coming from the Daimyo himself since presumably the war was partially his idea, but even the royal coffers are not enough to run a military city the size of Konoha kthanks), the village coffers are likely hanging out somewhere between “Naruto’s childhood allowance” and “I can offer you lint”.

Obviously, these things need to be taken care of pronto, and with the villages scrambling to have the money to rebuild, the Kage in charge are going to be much more willing to take on dirty missions like assassinations, extortion, blackmail, *whatever* just to refill the village coffers. But. The ninja villages still need to keep their social acceptability in order to start getting their C and B ranks back, especially after the war opened everyone’s eyes to how destructive shinobi can really be in large numbers. They cannot afford to be seen killing left and right and the Rogue ninja are a huge stain on their village’s reputation, but openly advertising that “hey, if anyone leaves the village we’ll behead them” really isn’t going to do any favors for keeping the shinobi who are in the same mental space Tsunade was when she got fed up and left Konoha altogether.

And this, I think, is what gave rise to the existence of ANBU. The Kages picking their remaining highly skilled and most loyal followers, putting them in masks so that they cannot be easily identified by civilians, and sent out to quietly complete these high level, socially unacceptable missions. They were sent out to deal with Rogue shinobi and make them disappear without advertising to all the other traumatized village shinobi that their village is “serve or die” rather than the more patriotic “we fight for our home” that they were raised with. They were sent out to perform civilian assassinations, extortion, whatever they were offered in order to shore up the village’s shaky economy of the time and enable the Kage to pay their soldiers.

Then, after the economy stabilized, the ANBU just kinda … never left. Because by then the respective Kage had realized that being able to take on these kinds of missions with high pay and no loss of social acceptability was useful, and in the wake of the First War with everyone being simultaneously paranoid of their neighboring country but also on eggshells to not start another war, the anonymity of ANBU became a convenient way to keep an eye on each other and subtly attempt to sabotage the other when it looked like they were getting too powerful. The next two Great Shinobi Wars only solidified ANBU’s role in the hidden villages for those very same reasons, even though I would argue that they were ultimately a Bad Idea because they put too much power in the hands of the Kage without their village clans being able to hold them responsible, and that’s how we get stuff like Danzo™ and the crimes committed by Danzo™ and the Sandaime against the Uchiha. The existence of ANBU and the ability to “anonymously” jab at each other also just encouraged the animosity between the Great Shinobi Villages, and allowed warmongers (Danzo™) to ensure that an actual peace never fully settled in until the 4th Shinobi War happened.

And the peace post the 4th war, by the way, SHOULD have been a huge boom in the popularity and use of shinobi rather than the detriment that the Boruto manga/anime insists on for like- all the reasons stated in the economics part of this rant as well as the rise of CORPORATIONS that would happily pay a lot for shinobi in a host of different capacities and also people paying for shinobi to pretty please come help rebuild our destroyed homes and farmland with your fancy ninja powers.

It’s also canon that several shinobi retired and went into other professions in the wake of this peace and alliance, such as *acting*, which opens up an entire potential slew of missions geared specifically toward movie producers using their new technologies and their bigger budgets to hire shinobi as stuff like stunt doubles, live special effects artists (need to rehearse but the set isn’t done yet? No problem!! Just hire someone with *genjutsu* to make your actors the ultimate set/stage), *makeup artists* (hey those infiltration skills come in handy in a lot of ways), and more. And that’s just one “modern” profession off the top of my head that would adore having Magic Ninja People available for hire.

I’m sure I’m missing a ton of potential peace time jobs and economic implications because again, I only research this stuff in relation to worldbuilding fictional places. But there we go, I have just gone a 3k rant about ninja economics in order to explain why ANBU are Scary. I hope ya’ll enjoyed.

A side note I couldn’t find a good spot for in the actual rant but another factor in the shinobi villages having to change their behavior and seem Socially Acceptable is because of the rise of civilian-born shinobi in their genin/chuunin ranks. Because there’s no way a civilian family is going to *want* their child to become a murderous psychopath. A competent, magic wielding defender of your merchant uncle’s caravans on the other hand…

Other rants I need to do at some point when my braincells aren’t mush are:

1. My personal HCs on Konoha’s orphanage/foster system (aka Hi, Let Me Give You More Reasons To Hate Sarutobi Hiruzen)

2. Ninja Economics Two: Warring States Boogaloo (Edit: now available here!)

3. Why Cannibal Space Ninjas Are The Stupidest Idea of Multiple Stupid Options

4. Boruto Ninja Cults: What Kishi Could’ve Done Instead of the Garbage We Got

5. Genin Corps (Aka Reasons Kishi Could’ve Given for Why No One Thought Kabuto Was Suspicious But Didn’t. Aka Ninja Economics 3 Babyyyyyy)

#Secret Engima Rambles #SE rants #naruto worldbuilding #ninja economics #boruto #taking red string and thumbnails of logic to Kishi's hot nonsense

[mintnanilla-extract]

It is nearly three in the morning and I have thoughts I need to get out concerning the new WWDITS episode because my brain won’t let me rest till I acknowledge them

First of all, Colin masterfully booby-trapping the house is exactly what I expect from him

Him (accidentally) getting caught in them is also exactly what I expect from him

Nandor throwing the knife to get Colin down was oddly hot

God I love the vampires collectively losing their fucking minds about trivial things when Guillermo is gone

I also love that The Guide was part of that this time

Laszlo and Nandor both going straight to the same stupid fucking idea proves that that that house only contains one shared braincell that The Guide usually is in possession of

The Guide and Nadja should have just ran off together and left the men to their stupidity

I love Memo but he really is selfish when he comes to his family, isn’t he. Rather than enjoying what time he has left to be with his family he completely forgets that it’s his mother’s birthday (even though it may be the last one he’s around to witness) and then proceeds to not even pretend that he didn’t forget it. It just showcases how little he thinks of anything but becoming a vampire

And then, on top of forgetting his mom’s birthday, he only focuses on the vampires

Side note but now I want some of the tamales that my Tia-who-isn’t-really-my-Tia-but-is-because-she-took-care-of-my-mom-and-her-siblings-when-they-were-kids makes

Minor Nandermo angst my beloved (any angst that isn’t the last few minutes of gos2 feels refreshing)

DOLLY’S HAIR WAS DYED TOO LIKE NADJA HOW DID YOU HAVE THE TIME

I need to see the contents of the go-bags

Colin doing the weather gave me LIFE

Are they not going to bother hypnotizing everyone after the Guide killed that lady or…

Colin seriously went all in with those booby traps like goddamn the man was dedicated

Overall, I loved the episode and will probably rewatch it tomorrow

#I don’t know if any of this makes sense I’m exhausted and just needed to ramble #wwdits #what we do in the shadows #wwdits spoilers

[chappellrroan]

ladies and gentlemen ✨her✨

and also this:

happy 20th birthday to one of the best things to happen to me ever aka @buticanfixhim , i will start with an i love you because ofc i love you if it wasn't obvious enough, your humour, your sass you and also your *cough cough* weird taste in food (ps strawberry flavour is still yucccckkk)

LIKE GENUINELY WTF IS THIS? okay anyways moving also your brain, you, watching kdramas with you, sharing all the unholy songs, staying up together incase miss swift plans to play with our sanity, all the moments spent with you are always so fun and precious to me. i love you for checking up on me always i love you for being so understanding i love you for always being there for me i don't think i can thank you enough for everytime you've made my day go from bad to more bearable and better and i love you for not giving up on yourself you're one strong person yk that, with all the family stuff and drama you still manage to look past it, take care of your brother, handle things when they get worse i cannot imagine the amount of strength and patience all of that takes also how are you so tolerant like genuinely???? no hear me out before you call yourself short tempered, yes you get angry easily but you handle it well too, you do everything to understand every person involved and just remove yourself instead of being a hater (dw i will do that job instead <3) okay idk where i was planning to go from this but all in all i am so grateful i have you and i love you for giving me such a strong dependable friendship because trust me i gave up on them long ago, and your presence makes everything better, and you better start making movies kdrama list mereko dekhni hai sabki sab also you're so pretty does *nazar utharing* REMEMBER TO ALWAYS TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND IT'S NOT OKAY TO NOT TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF JUST INCASE THE DOC WAS HOT okay i love you so much i hope this wasn't too emo WAIT ALSO TOP DITI MOMENTS CUE:

ksjsdj your sass <3, also look i found proof of us sharing half a braincell 💀

NOW ONCE AGAIN HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY I DID NOT INTEND TO MAKE IT THIS LONG BUT ANYWAYS I LOVE YOU I CAN'T SAY THAT IN SHORT FORM ATLEAST NOT TODAY

#diti catto

[corruptedmind]

Really, dude? [Leo Valdez]

Genre : Fluff, Funny

Summary : Y/N has had a crush on Leo since the moment she saw him. They were best friends now. What happens when she tries to confess her love for him?

"How about no?"

"How about yes-"

"No Leo. I will NOT help you make vibrators to sell them online and get money"

"But imagine the amount of money we'll get. We could buy new shoes and-"

"Shut up before I tell this to Percy and make him drown you in the camp's lake for corrupting me"

"You're the most disgusting minded creature I know, woman"

"But does HE know?".

Leo sighed in defeat. He knew I won this argument too, like I did always. He had this stupid idea to make vibrators and illegally sell it to people outside camp so he could get money and buy a new playstation.

Being his best friend, it was his job to annoy me and pull me in in all of his antics.

Some of them were good, and I would gladly accept making vibrators but if anyone found out we'd be in more trouble than usual.

"Why don't we just hang out near the lake for the day?", I asked.

"The same lake your brother was supposed to drown me in?", He raised an eyebrow and put a hand on his hip.

"Oh my Gods you're so smart, McShizzle Man Daddy Leo", I said in a high pitched voice trying to mock him.

"See lady, when you say that it isn't hot-"

"You sound like this though"

"No, I don't. I sound hot"

"You sound like a bitch"

"A hot bitch"

"An ugly bitch actually-"

"Y/N! LEO! THERE YOU ARE!!". Both of us turned behind to see Jason running towards us with a small smile. His blonde hair swept behind as he ran. His purple shirt tight against his muscles.

"Stop eye-fucking him, Y/N. He's already taken", Leo whispered into my ear.

I looked at him and smirked, "Don't worry. I'm into scrawny guys".

"Wait really-"

"Hey Y/N, Leo". Jason finally reached us and softly panted. He brushed his hair to the side and gave his respectful smile.

"Wassup?", Leo and I both said it in unison, but that was a natural occurrance.

We're best friends, we share one braincell.

"Percy and I decided to hangout at the Posiedon Cabin. We wanted you to come too", Jason looked at me and said.

"You're not gonna invite me?", Leo gave a fake hurt expression.

"It's a hangout for the seven of us, and we decided to invite Y/N too"

"You're going to invite me in my own Cabin?", I raised my eyebrow at Jason, making the boy beside me laugh.

"I-"

"We'll come, but we also have to go to the lake before the night", Leo cut him off and took my hand.

"Someone's getting jealous", I wiggled my eyebrows as we both set off in the other direction.

"No man can let my mamacita look at them like that", He crossed his arm and winked at me.

I laughed loudly and patted his arm. Just as I was about to comment something back, his sister Nyssa called him.

"Hey Leo! We need your help in making the new catapults!!", She said as she hulled a sheet of celestial bronze over her shoulders.

Leo looked back at me. "I'll see you later, Ma'am", he bid his farewell with bowing down and hopping off to his sister.

I smiled at his retreating figure with loving eyes. He was truly the best person I had met. From his cute features and charming personality, falling in love with him was easy.

"He's so oblivious, yknow", I heard a voice from behind me. I turned to find Piper and Jason standing side by side with their eyes on Leo who was now going back to his cabin.

"No, Pipes. I'm just good at being platonic"

"You flirt with him mercilessly"

"Which shows how platonic we are"

"Y/N, you should confess-"

"No, Piper". I cut her off. "After Calypso, I don't think he's ready yet". My arms circled around me as I give myself a hug.

"It's be a YEAR, Y/N", Jason softly said.

I just shook my head at him sadly and looked at his cabin. The nights where he cried in my arms, lonely and betrayed after his sudden break-up hurt me alot.

Calypso had broken up with him at dinner. She didn't explain at that time, and that hollowed Leo up. He wasn't okay after that. Calypso had left camp the next day and that left Leo's head filled with doubts.

I knew that if we ever got together, Leo would just hurt himself more.

"Lets just go and have lunch". I started walking away with my head down.

***

Lunch had finished in a blink of an eye with Percy talking on and on about how Finding Nemo and The Little Mermaid were the best movies in existence.

The talk from before had drained away my happiness and left me numb. I didn't eat much, but i didn't care. My fear for Leo's feelings increased with each passing moment.

Percy opened the door in front of me, snapping me out of my daze. As I entered my cabin, I saw Annabeth and Piper setting up the sofa with a bunch of board games. Drinks and popcorns and chips were set on the table beside.

Just as I sat on the couch with my knees up to my chest, a loud voice came from the door. I turned around and saw the rest of the guys come in. Frank entered first with a look of regret on his face with Hazel and Jason following him with small smiles. Just behind him a scrawny guy popped in laughing loudly

Instantly my mood became better.

Leo must have teased Frank making him pinch the bridge of his nose and silently sit by my side. Frank turned his head to me and frowned.

"Out of all the guys at camp.... You choose him???", He whispered.

I gave him a big smile, "Yes Zhang. Yes".

Leo then instantly came beside me and pushed Frank to the other side of the couch and sat beside me. "Hey Mama, long time no see", he wiggled his eyebrows making me laugh.

"Yes, and I missed you very much", I said and rested my head on his shoulder.

I felt him stiffen under me, but just a second later he loosened up. Resting his back on the couch, he became comfortable by my side.

"You okay, Y/N?", He softly asked me, not to get any attention.

"Not really. But after you came I feel better", I confessed.

Leo didn't reply back, but I could feel him smiling big.

Minutes later, Percy decided we all play Uno. In short, it was a mess.

Piper used charmspeak on all of us and Hazel used her magic mist to fool us what card she had. In the end Annabeth won with all the guys whining.

We played another game of Uno, but now without the three girls. I sat in beside Leo in the circle and continued my game. Though it was absolutely chaotic, with Percy and Leo continuously cheating, I loved having Leo beside me.

Two hours had gone by. We'd ended playing charades in which we had a girls vs boys match.

Of course the girls won.

As the hours went on, I naturally came to Leo's side without him questioning me. We comfortably sat on the couch with his legs over mine.

"Ahhh I had fun today", I heard Leo say softly.

Turning my head towards him I smiled, "Yeah. It was good. But look at the time, I guess we'll have to go to the beach tomorrow".

Leo suddenly pushed his face towards me and looked at me with wide eyes. In shock, I pulled my face back and stared at him back with my own wide eyes.

"Lady, when have we ever followed the rules of this camp? You literally sneaked out with me a bazillion times to go to Bunker 9. What's stopping us now?", He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

I laughed and pushed his face away from mine. "You make sense. So.... After dinner?", I proposed.

"Meet me there by 10", Leo winked at me as the conch horn blew for dinner.

Of course I blushed at his small action, but thankfully he didn't see me as he stood up at the sound of the horn.

"LET'S GO DEEP THROAT OURSELVES WITH SOME FOOD YO", Leo cheered and ran out of the cabin to the dining pavillion.

Just as I was about to follow him out, I heard Annabeth calling me. "Hey Y/N".

"Yeah?", I turned back to see her and the rest of the guys looking at me with concern.

"I don't wanna seem nosey, but will you ever confess to him about your love?", She frowned.

Of course she wanted to talk to me about this.

"I don't know, Annabeth. But at the moment, this is the best option-"

"Please, I'm no daughter of Athena but that is the best option", Hazel got up from her seat and looked at me right in the eye. "We all can see how much the both of you like eachother".

"T-The both...of us??", I tilted my head.

What did she mean by 'the both of us'?.

"Yes. The BOTH of you. I know you both spend more time with eachother than what we see, but all the moments we both see of you I know Leo likes you back. Heck, I feel like you're all on his mind", She explained.

I looked down at my hands. Suddenly feeling insecure about myself as I remembered who was Leo's first girlfriend.

It was a Goddess for fuck's sake!!!

I remembered how beautiful she was when she was still at camp. Her beautiful long blonde hair that rested by her face perfectly. Her almond eyes that could make anyone dreamy. Her pouty lips that made her look like a doll.

I had none of that, and that was what Leo fell in love with.

His standards were too high, and I didn't even reach it.

"I don't really know, guys. He fell in love with Calypso who broke up with him out of the blue. If we were to ever date, then he'll just be too paranoid about me leaving him", I softly said.

My mood that was once good, going down the drain abruptly.

"But you'd never leave him. He just has to learn to trust you, and that's something you both have to work on", This time, Percy was the one to speak.

It was rare to have him give any advice, but I knew what he said was right. A relationship works only when both the partners work together, and Percy had alot of experience with Annabeth throughout the years.

I looked down and nodded, a sudden burst of motivation flowing through me.

"I'll confess to him tonight. When we're at the beach", I announced with confidence.

"But won't the harpies be there?", Frank asked looking around.

"Don't worry, Y/N. You go ahead with no worries. We have your back", Jason got up and smiled. "Now let's go to eat, we're getting late".

***

Dinner was done fast, with all of us sitting in our respectful tables since it was dinner.

At about 8, we all head back to our cabins for the night, but with my plan to confess to Leo, Percy and I were up.

"So, should I wear this?", I held up a red frock in my hands and directed it towards Percy.

He was laying down on his bed propped up on his elbow. "Little Sister, you're not going on a date, you're going to a hangout", he yawned.

"But I'm gonna PROPOSE-"

"But does he know about it?", Percy raised his eyebrow.

I sighed in defeat and sagged down on my bed. It was 9:30 now, and thirty minutes were left for me to meet the love of my life.

"Hey Y/N", I heard Percy call me out.

"Mmm?", I grumbled.

"Wear anything you want. Keep it simple and probably put on something you know he would like", he said from his bed.

"He likes the colour red", I stated.

"That's why you took out your red frock....", I could hear the smirk in my brother's voice.

"I know, stupid. I'll just wear a hoodie with some sweatpants. I don't think he'll really care".

"Don't you have one of his hoodies with you...?", Percy finally sat up and looked at me with bright eyes.

My eyes widened in realisation. I got up from my bed and walked up to my wardrobe to find one of Leo's favourite red hoodie he had given me one night when we were at bunker 9.

"I like what you think, brother. Now I shall go change". I picked the hoodie up with my black sweatpants and went to the bathroom for a quick body bath.

I brushed my teeth and put my hair up in a messy ponytail. I didn't put any perfume on, since the scent of Leo was already driving me crazy.

Looking at myself in the mirror, I blushed crazily.

I was going to fucking CONFESS to a boy!!!

ASGHSJDLDLDLFJKFLGLKFKKSKSJSHSKAJDJD

I rubbed my cheeks and went out of the bathroom to find Nico lying on my bed as Annabeth laid beside Percy.

Annabeth noticed me coming out of the bathroom and smiled. She then looked at Nico, "I called him to shadow travel you safely to Leo".

"Yo", I greeted the emo boy.

He simply nodded his head and got up from my bed.

Nico and I too were very close friends after I found out about how he had a crush on Percy. It always made me crack how Percy just wasn't Nico's type.

"Come on, Nicola. We have a boy to confess to", I said as I put on my vans.

"I've already confessed to my boy. And please, stop calling me that", He groaned.

"What? Nicola???", I smirked.

"I will cut your breasts off-"

"Okay! Let's go Death boy", I cut him off and dragged him out of the cabin.

Soon, we were in the shadows.

I didn't necessarily hate shadow travelling, but it's side effects were horrible. Though we had just traveled a small distance, I felt nauseous and lied down on the ground.

I was about to thank Nico but he disappeared as soon he left me. I scoffed and got up from the ground, making my way to the beach.

The sound of the waves made me smile, and the smell of the sea water calmed me down.

This was my element, and I loved it here.

As I smacked a branch away to see the sea, my eyes landed on Leo who sat on the sand. The moon was right in front of us, with stars shining brightly above us.

I smiled and walked towards the scrawny boy.

"Hey Leo", I greeted and sat down beside him.

He looked at me and smiled, not responding back. The look in his eyes was enough to tell me he was thinking about something. And that something wasn't good.

"You wore my hoodie", he stated.

"I love this hoodie", I smiled at him.

"Hmm", he hummed and looked up at the stars.

His eyebrows suddenly turned into a frown as his eyes scanned the sky. It seemed like a memory passed in his mind, reminding him of something bitter.

Why would a beach make him sad?

Just as I thought that, I remembered he and Calypso met at an island, a beach... Maybe he was remembering his days with her on the same background.

"Are you.... still thinking of... her?", I hesitantly asked.

Leo let out a deep sigh, his eyes becoming cloudy. "No matter how much time goes by, I'll still think WHY she left me. Was I seriously THAT bad that she had to leave so fast? Did I really treat her so horribly that she broke up with me in front of the entire camp?".

I simply listened to him as he spoke, denying his words in my mind.

His voice wavered as he took in a sharp breath.

A moment of silence past through us, the sounds of the waves only being heard. I decided to break it.

"I don't really know where you came up with all these thoughts but we all know those are all lies", I started. "You were probably the best boyfriend to her, so caring and loving and considerate. You were the first one to be there for her in THOUSANDS of years. I can't really say why she broke up with you, maybe she has her own reasons. But what I know that it isn't even one that you said".

Leo looked at me, the stars shining in his eyes. He really looked pretty tonight. His hair naturally ruffled, with a small stain of grease on his cheekbone. His elfish ears poking out from his hair.

"I don't.... I don't really know what I would do without you, Y/N", he said softly.

"Haha we were meant to be", I joked looking away, a small blush appearing on my cheeks.

Leo then stood up, stretching a hand to help me up. I took it and dusted my pants as I got up.

"Let's take a walk", Leo announced and took my hand in his.

I gladly intertwined our fingers and went closer to his side, know him making the first move was very rare. I smiled by his side as we took slow steps, a comfortable silence hanging over us.

I was sure we had walked for about fifteen minutes, but I really didn't care. Being by his side alone in silence was the best thing I could wish for. Though not possible, I snuggled further into his side, making him chuckle.

I rested my chin on his shoulder and looked at his face. He was seriously very beautiful. Each curve and bump made my heart beat faster. His eyes drowned me further into the love I held for him. His nose just seemed more kissable that night. His lips twisted my stomach, building fantasies in my mind.

"Gods you're beautiful", I muttered softly.

Leo looked at me in shock and then pointed at his chest. "Me?", He asked.

I simply nodded and smiled at him. Under the moonlight, I could see his ears getting red.

"You're also very cute, señor bonito".

"Where are you getting these Spanish words from, señorita", Leo flushed.

"I've been learning", I said.

"Spanish?"

"Anything for you, baby", I winked at him.

Leo blushed agressively. "You're becoming too much like me".

I laughed heartily and walked ahead, dragging Leo with me. We walked for a few more minutes till a different atmosphere settled around us.

Our pace slowed down till we stopped and faced the sea. Our eyes lingered at the small waves coming to the shore.

It slowly dawned to that it was time.

It was time to tell Leo about my feelings.

Though I was absolutely nervous and my heart bet faster than when I faced monsters, I tugged Leo's hand to face me. He turned and tilted his head cutely.

A second went by as we just stared, but then I did it.

I kneeled down in front of him as my left hand went in my pocket while my right held his.

His eyes were wide in shock, but I didn't let that stop me.

"Leo Valdez, Son of Esperanza Valdez. I am here today, or tonight, to tell you about something important", I started. But the moment I found my flow, I let my heart control me. The love I held for Leo from the moment I laid eyes on him finally were free.

"I remember the day I had come to camp, after being rescued by Jason in my school. You were there, talking with Harley about something he wanted to know. You seemed so passionate about what you loved, and I understood that when I sneaked into the forest that night to find you in bunker 9, building. I couldn't believe how we immediately clicked after the first words we shared, and how fast I felt connected with you."

"I was heartbroken when I saw you and Calypso kiss, but that day I understood that what I felt towards you wasn't a simple crush, but true love. To see you happy with her made my day. Just to see you genuinely happy and smiling made ME genuinely happy and smiling. I never expected myself to experience such healthy love towards a person who was already dating. But the day she broke up with you was one of the worst days I'd experienced. I felt so much rage towards her for leaving you. All I could see was you crying in my arms. I hated her, Leo. But I just couldn't blame her"

"After that day I started feeling us getting closer. Not physically, but emotionally. At those times I knew the love I held for you was correct, because you never made me feel bad. You understood me in ways no one ever had. You embraced my weird self, and slowly molded into my other half. Leo, it was YOU who made me feel loved and happy. You being you made it so easy to love you back, and I know that I'll keep loving you no matter where your heart lies"

"Tonight, I don't want you to force yourself to love me back, but tonight's the night where you get to know how LOVED you are. If you don't like me back, that's really okay. But please know, that I will always stay by your side no matter way. Leo Valdez, I am absolutely in love with you. Will you please be my lover till eternity?"

Finally, as I regained control over myself, I looked up at Leo.

Tears were streaming down his face and I heard him ugly sobbing. He agressively wiped his nose with his hand as his chest rises up and down.

Worried, I got up and cupped his face. "If my speech of love was that bad, you could just say so. No need to cry", I said wiping his tears away.

His eyes locked to mine, and the next moment he was embracing. "Y/N, you have no idea what you make me feel. I really can't believe a person is capable of making me feel so... Needed. I-... You're seriously the bestest friend I've ever had", he sniffled.

Oh....

So I'm being rejected.

"I'll keep being your best friend no matter what, Leo. You're my official permanent buddy", I said making him laugh.

He pulled away from the hug and cupped my cheeks in his long hands. He smiled softly and scanned my face. "Thank you for everything, Y/N. Thank you for being their at my worst. Thank you for making me feel loved. Everytime you stood by my side, I just fell harder for you".

.....huh?

"Yes, Y/N. I love you too. And I'd love to be your lover for eternity", He spoke with a wide smile on his face.

His confession made my ears burn, my heart race against my chest. I looked at him with wide eyes.

"Is that a yes?", I asked.

Leo laughed, "Yes, it is".

I broke away from him and laughed, my own tears coming out of my eyes. Two years of loving him, and finally he was mine.

"I love you, Leo Valdez", I said.

"I love you too, Y/N", he responded.

His hand circled my waist, pulling me close to him. At the close distance, I could feel his heart beating as fast as mine was.

"Can I kiss you, mi amor?", His accent slipped out, making me blush.

I looked up at him and let myself smile. Getting up on my tip toes, I leaned in to carefully set my lips on his. A shot of electricity passed through my body, though the touch was so soft.

My eyes closed down, and Leo pressed into me. We didn't move, we just stayed like that. Lip to lip, as our love finally reached to the other. Breaking away to get breath, I looked at him again.

"I forgot to tell you, but you look very fuckable in my hoodie, Y/N", He wiggled his eyebrows.

"Really, dude? Not even five minutes since we confessed"

"You love me like that, though".

"True true".

"So....now what?", He asked looking around.

An idea sparked in my head. "I tell everyone you rejected me and then we make out at lunch in front of everyone".

"Oh I have the most perfect girlfriend".

#pjo #HoO #Leo #leo valdez #leo valdez x reader #leo valdez fanfiction #percy jackson #Annabeth chase #piper mclean #jason grace #hazel levesque #frank zhang #nico di angelo #fluff #funny #fanfic stories #fanfiction #pjo fanfic

[messier-47]

RE7, RE8

A study of Ethan Winters cause I love him as a character and he's so fucking weird? definetely interesting.

I've taken a few liberties about his character

RE8 is so fucked up.

I hate it.

Okay, so Resident Evil games have this entire set up/scheme that they religously follow. If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it, right? RE7 was different because it was a FPS with a very intimate horror setting. It relied solely on horror and not just the adventure side of most Resident Evil games. RE8 was crafted exactly like a typical Resident Evil videogame which isn't bad but Ethan made the difference.

Ethan is "a regular dude" given the motive "save my daughter" with the added emotional turmoil of "my wife is dead". Kinda sounds familiar right? it's almost in parallel with RE7.

"My wife's been missing for 3 years" -> "i just my wife get murdered"

"I must find my wife" -> "i must find my daughter."

So now we have Ethan's entire emotional state and motive to go forth into dangerous scenario to base videogame off of. However...all too quickly everything gets way out of hand. In RE7, the presented story is something understanble and maybe even relateable to Ethan's understanding of the world. He went into the deep swamps of Louisiana and there's a crazy murder family who'd been snatching victims (this is without the explanation of mold which is later revealed to him). Now he walks into a european village and there suddenly werewolves? steampunk man with metal powers? marionette witchcraft? hunchback of putrid mutant? evil seraphim? this is way out of his league of understanding!

And yes, he had some form of military training and was in some form of witness protection program? However there's a BIG difference between "yeah I survived Louisiana madhouse that just happened to be a mold hot spot, afterwards getting military training" and then Leon Kennedy level of bullshit bumfuckery. speaking of Leon, RE8 was odd because it kept treating Ethan as if he was Leon!

I don't mean the "Ethan Winters your reputation proceeds you" or how RE8 was just a reordered version of RE4 with some diverse bossfights, it was the "let's treat Ethan like the heroic character" when...he isn't. RE8 would have been so much better if Miranda and the Lords weren't so concerned over Ethan's appearance. What if Miranda and the Lords were going about their business getting ready for the ceremony when suddenly there was "some guy" who starts culling their army reserve?

Ethan's character in RE8...is pretty bland in comparison to RE7. Again, it's probably because he's a "quiet" man who doesn't really talk to the camera about what he knows, what he's thinking or feeling. RE8 is so big and momentous that it sorta drowns him out as a character with agency. His dialogue isn't as rich, his choices are very guided towards an endpoint, and...even the shit we do see makes Ethan out to be more heroic than what we've seen in RE7.

It's...odd? and maybe this is just bais and opinion at this point but Ethan Winters is a character ill-fitted into the protagonist role of RE8. Whereas Chris Redfeild, Leon Kennedy, and Jill Valentine could all be fitted into heroic roles and imagery like King George and the Dragon, David and Goliath, and Joan of Arc, Ethan was never a character to lead an epic journey. He's more of a "silent hunter"? idk, keep having the image of a slow and steady persistence hunter, verses...whatever the hell the other heroes got going for them.

Really, the storyline of RE8 is ill-suited for Ethan. Can't say I don't understand, a videogame is often just a videogame so the story is compromised to better fit the gameplay. and because it's so bad, I'm really tempted to do a RE8 rewrite fanfic out of pure spite but lmao ain't got enough braincells to spread across two fandoms when i'm already invested in one.

So we go up against the 4 Lords before we have a face-off against Miranda. The segment in Lady D's castle...was awkward in a character development sense. Ethan heads into the castle over and over against cause it's the biggest building around and thus the most likely to have his daughter, except even with the Duke's hints and encouragement, Ethan's motive was really shaky. Why? Because was he in the castle to save his daughter or to kill vampire ladies? would've been better if that part of the game was more dedicated to "run, hide, and investigate" with the sisters trying to hunt for him just like later Lady D would do. Instead we have multiple mini-boss fight scenes before we see the cradle and remember why we're in the castle in the first place. then we fight+defeat Lady D. Which is weird? Okay, so game mechanics Lady D just happens to find you after you kill her 3 daughters and start tomb-robbing. However...story wise it's weird because your PRIME motive is "find my daughter" so why go on killing spree? why the heroics?

we go to Duke and finally get our mission to find/build master key and also collect daughter parts from the 4 Lords.

We go to Beneviento's house which was a WASTED OPPORTUNITY for some character exposition. CURSE YOU ETHAN FOR BEING A QUIET MAN!!! We got to hear Mia talking to herself throughout her pregnaucy and honestly without the added context of "Mia was confronting the truth about both Ethan and her baby being mold people" ...i would have thought all her dialogue was due to a hard pregnaucy. This could have been prime real estate to expose Ethan and Mia's relationship, how they healed after RE7, their thoughts about building back their marriage, their fears and even the doubts about having a child. but we get NOTHING from Ethan! Was the monster baby a representation of Mia's fear? Ethan's fear? or was it just a monster? IDK! this part was so good horror wise but storytelling it SUCKED!

the Monreau segment was so lackluster. It was just a RE4 reference except more gross with acid and boogers everywhere. Ethan is able to get ahold of his daughter piece and for some reason he found pity for Monreau's weeping? He definitely stopped to listen to whiny fish baby's tantrum which I find really odd because...why??? He never showed much sympathy so why now would he stop to listen to "Miranda wants her baby back" speech? unless it was only meant for a game mechanic which i'm getting sick and tired of because it's just shit writing at this point.

We go get to reunite with Chris and get some answers as to what's going on but really Chris? you're gonna look the same man who UNTRAINED and COMPLETELY IGNORANT managed to clear an entire bioweapon's mold infestation BY HIMSELF and try to say "stand down" and expect obediance? yeah, your brainwashing military training ain't that strong.

Then we get to Karl's segment and... honestly why? why was Karl even interested in Ethan? Ethan doesn't have extraordinary abilities other than "fuck you" levels of adrenaline and perseverance. So why did he want Ethan on his team as he reblled against Miranda? Heh, almost understanable why Karl/Ethan is a thing because i can't think or anything other than pure lust probing Karl to make his offer. Karl is a bioweapon engineer, having built an army of cyborgs and is probably the only person in the village who know how cellphones actually work. Oh, as he had magnet powers so why does he want/need Ethan? In order for Rose to be reliably handled and managed? she's a 6 month baby, not even potty trained, wtf?

then chris comes clean about everything and Ethan uses tank to defeat mutant Karl with some moves pretty sure Leon Kennedy would be proud of cause they were pure bullshit.

Ethan finds out about his own mold problem and ugh you can't convince me the whole "Ethan knew he was going to die so might as well sacrifice himself" was just add to trigger the fuck out of Chris who'd seen his friend in RE5 die in an incredibly simular way. Very dramatic, heroic scene. Very "i face god and walk backwards into hell"

All in all...RE8 was a videogame. Forgiveable? Yeah, cause it was never meant to be a story. the problem here is that whilst all Resident Evil games are literally video games and makes compromises about characters, their development arcs, their stories so that it's more about the game than an actual narrative, RE8...was just a game with a cobbled together story with no care to the actual characters.

And it wasn't just Ethan who got the short end of the stick. Chris Redfield was casted into an anti-hero role and Mia was a forgotten SUPER SKETCHY character throughout. Uuuuuuggggghhhh at this point i'm just raging against a video game instead of doing an indepth character study. sorry gang

#ethan winters #resident evil #chris redfield #re8 #re8 village #character study #long post #rant incoming

[mrsfezziwig]

KQ - The Reason Ateez Don't Win Awards: (Pt 1)

n.b.(Good God I am actually scared of what reaction this may get from other Atiny but I feel like it is something I really need to address!)

Ateez are incredible;

as humans, as a group, as vocalists and as rappers, but their stand out ability comes in the way they perform and dance. I have never seen a group like these eight men when it comes to their star power; all of them could probably be in The Demon Line now they have matured, especially Yunho, who feels more relaxed on stage, more intense and he is most definitely not holding himself back anymore (That YunGi clothes grab in the Wonderland tour version, anyone? This Mrs Fezziwig was fanning herself like a Georgian Regency lady with a hand fan and blaming it on her age - hot flushes, you know... Oof! ). But anyone with a braincell can look at the lack of acknowledgement of their talents in terms of end of year award show nominations and wonder what the hell is going on?! It is incredibly irritating when people who deserve to have their hard work and talents celebrated are passed over again and again.

Now, this is where I just know I am going to be side-eyed, possibly bombastically, because I need to make comparisons in order to make my points as this is only about my opinion, and things I see other Atiny discussing on socials. In addition everyone knows how close the members of these two groups are as friends, hence why I am risking my sanity to say it:

The Comparison - Stray Kids

What makes Stray Kids so well awarded isn't just their agency, which has absolutely helped, with their money, organisation and longevity in the idol industry, but there's also the fact that they have practically carte blanche when it comes to the music they make. No body on this good, green Earth can ignore the sheer genius that is 3RACHA and their most common producer, Versachoi, when it comes to their abilities to write, compose and produce their songs.

Every emotion in the human pantheon of feeling is out there in a song available for fans to discover from their catalogue. Their forte is the musical freedom all the members contribute to the group.

SKZ hits harder because they are performing their own emotion out in song and dance, having three geniuses in one group is fated, no one can ever tell me otherwise... However, Ateez doesn't have that extra layer of connection even though the boys are still insanely versatile and make it work.

That's not the fault of the members, BBTrippin or even on some level the collective Edenary, they're all being told the same thing by the agency. It lies in the fact that those at the top want it to be this way.

I don't say this as a diss against Edenary, and I have yet to find a skip song on their albums. It is all impactful, musically, there is nothing but hit after hit on those but the lyrics just aren't up to par. Guerilla was about a fictional revolution, Halazia was about a fictional revolution from the outsider perspective, Bouncy was about an, um... fictional revolution and Crazy For-... Yeah, I am going to stop here.

KQ CEO-nim, I respectfully say:

Holy Fuck... Drop the fucking storyline into the b-side! Yep, you heard me right - Drop. The. Fucking. Storyline. From. The. Title. Tracks! Plllleeeeaaaaasssseee?

I am pretty sure all the inhabitants of Dimensions A and Z, and how ever many other of these buggers are hiding in the mind of the planners, shall collectively gasp dramatically 'Blasphemy!'

What a cardinal sin to suggest such a thing!!! Pre-debut Atiny are clutching their pearls and Diary Version albums as I speak such foul utterances, wondering how I could possibly have the very cheek of it to say such a thing! Do you think the boys will be proud of the dramatic delivery here? 😂

Yes, there are some moving and heart-wrenching b-sides on Ateez albums that are ignored for the scale of interdimensional time Pirates, which makes it increasingly, painfully obvious that those emotions are rare in their title tracks. So, I will make the point I've been moving up to with the comparison:

KQ need to let loose the reins

I first encountered Ateez in my initial journey with kpop in 2021 and I was in my 'BTS got me hooked, Stray Kids toppled them with Hellevator from my focus, and Ateez seems interesting...' era

Being 38 I felt kinda like some sort of sicko for finding guys I could have birthed attractive and I still have twinges of this feeling occasionally. Thankfully, none of the 5th Gen children are anything other than cute little babies to me, ones that I want to tut at, throwing appropriate clothing their way and ground them for going out in such tiny skirts and dresses. As you can imagine, finding Deja Vu as my first Ateez song sent me screeching dramatically away from the group, hands flapping and looking for a man my age to hide behind [thank you, Rain; you were extremely helpful during my mid-life-ish crisis].

So I continued on my way along up the endurance hike that is the Stray Kids path, again feeling slightly creeped out at myself for buying Oddinary, but also in absolute awe at the music these eight guys made. I still don't have a fucking clue what their storyline is, although it is coming more into focus thanks to the most recent SKZFLIX but that's kinda positive as it allows for their flexibility in terms of what they say and how it's performed and perceived.

At the core, I like their lyrical content better than Ateez, purely due to the fact it's visceral in its emotional impact. With a leader like Bang Chan, I haven't been surprised to find so many amazing fans out there too. Older STAYs I chat with on Discord have been my rock and support as I admitted my feelings of discomfort at the age thing and we figured out it was my STBX husband and his reaction to my new found hobby and likes that left me feeling so icky.

With their help, I finally got the courage up to accept that we were done after 20 years and I haven't missed him except for one occasion [I was facing a general anaesthetic to have a massive abscess on my jaw drained, all alone in a hospital about an hour from home with nobody at all to hold my hand] since he left in March. Every time I faced a backwards step emotionally because of my Ehler-Danlos Syndrome and my limitations, they were there to check on me.

This community is what makes Kpop the best rabbit hole I ever plunged into - stay away from Twitter (No, Elon, it isn't called 'X', it's called Twitter!) and the fans are such magnificently, genuine hearted people who just get me! For the first time in my life my sense of humour wasn't misinterpreted and rather slotted into place like this was where I was meant to be all along. When I found this tribe I was so lonely it was frightful, and it's only by being who I am today with their love and support I can look back at that version of myself and cry for her desperation and black-fog draped soul.

99% of the people in that chat are actually StayTiny, and they were discussing Halazia, insisting I really need to watch the MV. So I did, and as thankful I am for BTS getting me into Kpop and Stray Kids for finding me at my lowest then giving me my coping song in Voices, Ateez overtook them all in one MV. There is something about these guys that I connected with. That began my twisted path in April 2023 in learning names, songs and personality types that lead me to December and the drop of Crazy Form. Yet they may now be my Ult group, Stray Kids are my foundation in the world of idols. And no, I still can't handle Deja Vu no matter how many times I have tried to make it happen. So far I can get to the end of Yunho's opening but I can't take San with that haircut and eyebrows without cringing and backing out, which means I've progressed beyond the sexual feel of the song and am now firmly entrenched in 'Second-hand Embarrassment Station'.

Ateez could be much bigger if...

Despite the connection I found with these seven crackheads plus Jongho, instantly was thrown off by the incessant focus on the story of Ateez and dimension hopping, wondering where they were, as in where were the personal stories; the freedom of expression and grounding focus of reliving your experience in music?

If the story came in the form of a novel, I would be pre-ordering that shit off Amazon faster than I pre-order SKZ and Ateez albums. And I am not alone in this sentiment. After five years in the industry, these guys aren't newbies, they have the experience to handle the responsibilities of writing their own songs with guidance from Edenary and creating their own choreo alongside BBTrippin.

Hearing how the agency weaves the lore into every single MV and title track, I felt angry. I still am and am likely to always be, because if they let up and allowed the boys to display their joy, sorrow, happiness and agony in their songs and choreo, Ateez would be even greater, they'd be a force to be reckoned with particularly in the international market where they just work already. This is where BTS and Stray Kids have Ateez beat.

international fans have come to expect that the music is written and produced by the members of a group. Sure this could be argued as being a side effect of BTS getting so big, it's also a factor no one should discount.

Now, I shall move onto the part I love most: 'saying shit 'people who don't have a genetic pain disorder and who still have two flying fucks to give' won't...

The agency is responsible for the lack of mainstream recognition in terms of awards and fans because that oomph 3RACHA pour into their music is where the disparity lies.

With performers like the eight men in Ateez imagine them being up there on the VMAs stage getting all the praise... And the viral Taylor Swift reaction to match... Her reaction to Chan was just so relatable after all (be still my Swiftie/STAY/Atiny manic heart). I can't lie, the thought of them never being recognised in the mainstream before it's too late and they disband to focus on solo careers makes me tear up. Oh, that's so dramatic of me is what people who don't know Ateez will think,

'Ewwww... it's not that deep 🙄! Go touch some fucking grass and stop being so saesang coded' { Bitch, if I could go outside without dislocating my hip, I'd still be an Archaeologist! Is that enough grass and mud for you all?}

With a massive 'Wooyoung-thicc, baby-girl-twerking' ass BUT(t):

The thing is, it actually is that deep.

I am sick of spending comeback day piecing together the story point instead of looking at the video and lyrics and it's meaning. Which invariably is about the destruction of the dystopian universe. Don't Stop did the story telling in a way that made sense for what the video portrays and it works real fucking well (plus Mingi? Oooh, damn boyyy!). We understood it because it was all there to be found!

Imagine having that every comeback day, the 'falling out of bed at 5am to match KST' would be so much more enjoyable because there isn't any depth to plunder, it would be a {most definitely not} straight shooting banger or bopper or tear-mopper of a track, ALMOST ENTIRELY written and produced by the members for us to enjoy on repeat. Then a few days later the Edenary b-side/s with all the storyline desired would drop and we would be mentally prepared to disect every second of it because our thirst would have diminished to the 'reasonably manageable when those eight beautiful men plus San's chocolate bar abs are in the world' level.

Whilst I intended to make all my points in one post, I will split it up because of the length it's going to be... To be continued...

#ateez #hongjoong #seonghwa #yunho #yeosang #choi san #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #kq entertainment #crazy form #comeback #edenary #don't stop #music #AtoZ #dystopia #music video #opinion #Atiny #8 makes 1 team #kpop #Spotify

[shortpplfedup]

My School President Episode 1: Chinzhilla Rocks!

I was not planning on watching this show. I was completely uninterested when the pilot trailer aired last year. But then the official trailer had the Love Sick DNA all over it, and as a devotee of Pun and Noh, I was duty bound to check this out.

Dear reader, I love it. As pilot episodes go, this one was absolutely top of my list. It's somehow dethroned the Bad Buddy pilot and the I Told Sunset About You pilot, and it takes a whole lot to do that. This show's got slackers, it's got a ragtag band of misfits, it's got hijinks, it's got pining, it's got charm, it's got heart, it's got singing I don't hate...it's light and fun and enjoyable and it makes me ready to dive into this story.

Gun, the fearless lead singer

I'm a shooting star leaping through the sky like a tiger Defying the laws of gravity I'm a racing car passing by like Lady Godiva I'm gonna go, go, go, there's no stopping me

Queen | Don't Stop Me Now (1978)

This dude cannot back down from a challenge! Gun loves music, yeah, but he also obviously hates to lose. This kid's ready to do whatever it takes to win Hot Wave, and I have a sneaking suspicion that may come from a deeper place than 'must restore our reputation'. This show's clearly meant to be light and fun, but that doesn't mean it won't break my heart at some point, and I am absolutely ready for that to happen.

Tinn, the secret groupie

There goes my baby She knows how to rock and roll She drives me crazy She gives me hot and cold fever She leaves me in a cool, cool sweat

Queen | Crazy Little Thing Called Love (1979)

I am constitutionally obligated to love a piner. It's the law, I don't have a choice. And Tinn is SO smitten, with the staring and the doodles and the secret smiles and the behind the scenes machinations. He's got a big crush, but it's also realistic; Tinn's under no illusions as to Gun's flaws, key among them his stubbornness. Watching Tinn read Gun like a book and then proceed to help him out by leaning into that stubbornness when it helps move things forward...how am I supposed to NOT fall in love with that?

Chinzhilla, the single-braincelled organism known as the band

We are the champions, my friends And we'll keep on fighting till the end We are the champions We are the champions No time for losers 'Cause we are the champions of the world

Queen | We Are The Champions (1977)

Gosh what a loverly bunch of coconuts. A chaotic friend group of good-hearted dumbasses will always make me uncontrollably fond, and these idiots have my fondness levels on 1000. They haven't a clue, but they're teenagers and that's absolutely allowed. They'll figure it out someday, in the meantime they have each other.

Ad Libs

We don't really spend any time with Tinn alone this ep, and I am already DESPERATE to see his side of this story. How the hell did he even end up with such a monster crush on this total slacker? At what point did he realise that he was going to have to continuously save Gun from himself?

Fourth and Gemini are absolutely charming (the busking in the park scene is probably the clearest example of their charms), and the physical acting choices are on point. I love a good Odd Couple dynamic.

The theme song is a catchy-ass little bop.

Gun's mom is so fun I love her.

Prom (Pat) is a little gem and I am watching him closely. Kid might be going places.

Nice to see Au making the leap from AD to director, he seems to be a steady pair of hands so far. He's been sitting at Aof's right hand for a while, so let's see what he's learned.

#my school president #chinzhilla rocks! #Spotify #bl meta series

[thegreymoon]

Love Like the Galaxy

Cutie, bringing warmth and colour to his life residence is going to be your job 😋

***

LMAO, and they almost made their escape 😂😂

***

Cackling 🤣🤣

Look at all these minions physically blocking dad so that LBY can get some alone time with Niaoniao! 

***

LMAOOOO, and daddy ran off! He’s so useless 😂😂

***

Jiang Cheng in pastels is giving me cognitive dissonance 😂

He’s so beautiful! 

***

I am dead and buried 🤣🤣

The Emperor has one braincell and one braincell only, and it is perpetually preoccupied with thoughts on how to get Zisheng to marry 😂😂

***

For real.

***

Niaoniao embarrassing herself in front of the Emperor is sadly predictable and only hilarious because we know that he is benevolent and predisposed to overlook anything as long as she gets Zisheng to fuck. 

***

Her world is so insane, I tend to overlook that she is just a baby.

***

The best part of this audience with the Emperor was watching Yuanyi almost perish in mortification any time Niaoniao opened her mouth 🤣🤣

***

So, I’m taking it that our girl here is keeping a harem of hot men 🔥🔥

***

I like her!

She has no time for her spoiled daughter’s nonsense.

***

LMAO 🤣🤣

Remember your bad luck, Niaoniao? 

***

Delicious 😋

***

OMG, he put her shoe on for her in front of all those bitter, jealous wretches! 😍

Cinderella, who?

***

LMAO, was this a proposal? Did he just propose??

***

OMG, HE REALLY IS PROPOSING

Zisheng, I love you, but shouldn’t you have, uh... TALKED TO THE LADY FIRST????????????

***

Their stupid faces 🤣🤣

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I can’t stop laughing 🤣🤣

Also, send them off to start making gremlin murder babies immediately, why don’t you 🤣🤣

***

Yuanyi, do us all a favour and shut up for once 😡

Weren’t you the one advocating for her to get involved with LBY when she was engaged to Lou Yao?

***

LMAO, I am speechless.

With a mother like this, who needs enemies? 

***

Oh, for fuck’s sake, woman, are you trying to ruin her life??

***

Oh, yes, thank you for your input, that was just what was needed 😅

This entire episode, I cannot 😅😅 Poor Niaoniao.

***

Finally, someone tells her to shut up.

***

I was initially going to go on a rant about public proposals (especially without at least letting the girl know you like her, because WTF Zisheng), but after Yuanyi’s performance, all I have is applause.

***

Honestly? After the stunt her worthless parents just pulled, I’d marry him too, even if he had warts and horns and fire coming out of every orifice on his body. The public proposal is totally forgiven. 

***

LMAOOOO, I love the Emperor! He’s so not here for empty theatrics 🤣🤣

***

I am getting so much schadenfreude out of this 🤣🤣

***

Ummm... she’s not batshit insane, for one 🙄

#love like the galaxy #lltg spoilers #lltg ep23 #lltg ep24

[chocoenvy]

Alright, so what if Child!reader just appeared out of nowhere in Tsaritsa's palace (the name is too hard to type) after Signora's funeral.

Which two out of the (technically) 10 harbingers do you think is best suited for taking care of Child!reader? Go!

my first thought is childe and signora but....

childe is definitely on the board, he has a family, he knows what he's doing.

Pierro is also up there. Dad vibes. Probably the only one with a working braincell.

Also apparently the hot lady (her name is hard to spell so i've resorted to calling her this) has an orphanage? I feel like she's still prone to violence and kinda sucks with kids but I think if it were babysitting duty she'd do a great job! And as long as she wasn't with anybody she hated.

Marionette would suck at taking care of kids.

I feel like child!reader would have fun with Pulcinella though, so he goes high up on the list.

Pantalone..... he gives me rich asshole vibes. Probably hates children, has probably called childe's siblings rats or some other derogatory name. he tries to pretend he likes you. He fails.

Dottore is not allowed near children.

based off of appearances alone capitano is probably great with children. I dunno, he sees child!reader and he's quiet and gentle and patient when dealing with them. And he's damn scary. I think he'd be great for babysitting duty or general dad duties.

Searched up Columbina and her wiki says "In commedia dell'arte, a type of Italian theater, "Columbina" ("Little Dove") is a female servant who is often the "only functional intellect on the stage" as she does her best to get the Innamorati together."

I was gonna say she'd be decent but with this new knowledge, I'd say she's pretty competent. Maybe on the same level as Childe. I think she, Childe, and Pierro are the only ones able to cook competently so that puts them in the top three.

So! To summarize! The order of which i think the fatui harbingers would be able to competently take care of a child from a loving parent to legally obligated to not be near children are:

Pierro, Childe, Columbina, Capitano, Pulcinella, Arlecchino, Pantalone, Marionette, and Dottore

#choco.asks #no matter how pretty the teaser made him dottore will always be a crusty old man <3

[thekatebridgerton]

Bridgerton siblings and their spouses ranked by intelligence. From the one who doesn’t have a single brain cell to the one with the most.

Well in one degree or another they're all dumbasses but on a scale of who has the braincell for the longest here we go.

1) Hyacinth: by far the smartest Bridgerton. I may not like her as a character in it's in his kiss. But her use of the one braincel is impeccable

2) Eloise: only ranks above Francesca because it took her less than a week to figure out she was inlove with Phillip. Compared to Francesca's track record. Eloise is a solid 8/10 smart

3) Francesca: smart enough to avoid scandal in London and keep her reputation spotless. She ranks under Hyacinth and Eloise because she took too long to figure out her feelings for Michael.

4) Daphne: she should rank higher, because the fake dating scheme was genius, but tricking a Simon into having a baby was a supremely stupid move.

5) Anthony: he's self aware enough to know he's an idiot at least and works to compensate this by marrying Kate . So compared to his brothers, Anthony is definitely the sharpest tool in the shed

6) Gregory: well intentioned fool, sharp enough to pick up social cues and underlying context in conversations. But an idiot when it comes to Hermione and Lucy actually make that women in general

7) Colin: rarely uses the braincell, he's happy being the foolish charming Bridgerton brother. Who didn't know his own feelings for 8 years. But he gets a point for being successful at figuring out his love interest secret identity and being the first to do so

8) Benedict : does not use the collective braincell at all. Biggest blind idiot of the family period. But we love him. (Still I'm pretty sure Sophie does all the logical thinking in his marriage )

As for the ranking of their spouses. Who are after all pretty smart to compensate we have of course

1) Sophie: honestly considering her circumstances. She wins as the smartest person in the room. If she hadn't met Benedict she'd still have found a way to escape Araminta and live a pretty neat life eventually

2) Penelope: why do I feel like I'm going in reverse order from the list above?. Penelope only ranks under Sophie because half of her problems could have been solved if she'd told her secret to Lady Danbury and let her pretend to be LW. Even the Cressida plot. In everything else she's pretty darn smart

3) Gareth: all things considered, Gareth is good plotting and if you notice unless Hyacinth interferes. He's pretty successful in his plans

4) Lucy: common sense thy name is Lucy. She's smarter than Kate was at that age. She's very Logical and her advice is always spot on. It's not her fault that people don't listen to her wisdom

5) Kate: only seems like a smart person. But in reality she's just as dumb as Anthony. People just don't notice because she's always hanging out with someone who looks less smart than her. Like her husband and her brother in laws

6) Simon: very smart fake dating idea terrible execution. He gets a point for all the maneuvering he did during the season and for having a moderately working common sense

7) Phillip: smart academically but only academically, he can manage an estate and make it profitable. Help cure children fever and probably has the best medical knowledge in the family. But in everything else he's a hot mess. Socially and emotionally Philip isn't smart he's just very very lucky that nobody has taken advantage of him yet. That's the headcanon

8) Michael: acts and looks smart but is actually a well meaning idiot. sorry Michael. But we don't shame him because at least he's better than Benedict in the one braincel department. I mean really he's not that stupid. He's just stupid in comparison to all his fellow in-laws Well meaning as he is. Also he ranks 8th because he's the only in law who ever hightailed out of the entire continent to escape his feelings. (Idiot.) Not the country, the continent!

And this has been the tea 🍵

#on a scale of 1 to 8 #bridgerton #anthony bridgerton #kate sharma #Benedict Bridgerton #sophie beckett #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #eloise bridgerton #phillip crane