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#honestly i don't know how many times i should say this
dreamskug · 2 days
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[ SUBJECT INTERVIEW: ÍVARR ]
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NICKNAME:
NOT "Gramps". Not for you, anyway. Just my name.
GENDER:
Male.
STAR SIGN:
Why, checking if we’d match? Hah. Was told I’m a Scorpio. 'That check out?
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HEIGHT:
With platforms or without?
ORIENTATION:
If we vibe, nothing else matters. An incubus with neat taste in personalities, I guess.
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NATIONALITY / ETHNICITY:
So, some Scandinavian blood in me - half, actually. Can speak the language, too - 'least something neat daddy gave me, not that the fucker's outdone himself in parenting. Mom’s an American, born in Badlands. Ever heard of her clan? Messed with witchcraft a lot, and summoning even more. Know what I’m getting at? A perfect fuckin' match, weren't they?
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FAVE FRUIT:
- Yeah no. Don't even start with anything citrus. Especially don't peel this shit in front of me, alright? Nasty shit. [Interviewer]: - Just wondering, how do you feel about cardboard boxes? [Ívarr] : - Ain't purring for you, man. But nice one.
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FAVE SEASON:
Fuck summer. You ever felt what's that like - the real winter nights? Pitch fuckin' dark - quiet so thick you hear the snow falling. First time I saw those snowflakes as a kid - can swear I thought they were bees.
FAVE FLOWER:
Cherry blossoms? The fuck I know, man. Ask my mainline, I grab whatever he likes.
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FAVE SCENT:
Expecting me to be like - "Muahaha, the smell of fear"? Seriously, it's apparently a pheromone released in your sweat or some shit. C'mon I'm joking, it isn't my fav - keeps stinking up this damn city. Alright, a freshly baked cake is something I'd kill for.
COFFEE, TEA, HOT CHOCOLATE:
Yeah coffee I guess? Rich, strong, black, with a splash of something fun, make it whiskey.
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AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP:
Woke up just yesterday 'cause my mainline was pulling back my eyelid, imagine? Scared the fuck out of him, no seriously, can sleep through a fuckin' bomb and I'm not joking. Average hours - a shitton honestly? That's how I got my very first cat - Dad got enough of me breaking down every single morning, cause fuck mornings. And he'd be like - this is Snowy, she's gonna live with us and she already had her breakfast, so get the fuck up. How'd I argue with Snowy? You don't mess with Snowy.
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DOG OR CAT PERSON:
See? Check it out - cat fur. Here too. I'm claimed, man - gave up cleaning it up a long time ago. Not to be dramatic, but if there's anything human in me left - it's for them. Fur kids, all mine, what can I say. Two of them adopted - and you bet each of them has a bigger personality than an average gonk.
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DREAM TRIP:
Dream trip, jeez... Somewhere not fucking hot?
FAVE FICTIONAL CHARACTER:
Balrog has style, y'know? Gotta be honest, I feel for the dude. Imagine yourself sleeping deep within the mountains for thousands of years to get awoken by a bunch of motherfuckers? I'd go nuclear too. And this one too, ehh you know GoT? The Targaryen, her, yeah. Burn them all, girl. Boss move.
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NUMBER OF BLANKETS YOU SLEEP WITH:
Man, your questions. I dunno, a half? With my ass covered, or not at all. Bed king sized, lights out, make it pitch black with the window open and you got me passed out.
RANDOM FACT:
One doesn't have to actually summon a demon to get them to come play, d'you know? There's one watching you through my eyes right fuckin' now. Should I introduce him?
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Late to the party, but I remember many of y'all have more than one OC or just created new pixel babies that haven't participated yet, so I'm tagging (with no pressure):
@therealnightcity @wraithsoutlaws @sammysilverdyne @theviridianbunny @th3irin
@a-pirate @chessalein @halkuonn @luvwich @shimmer-like-agirl
@kdval @cybersteal @cyberholic77 @chevvy-yates @morganlefaye79
@anxious--ace @mhbcaps @wormskul @silver-samurai @androgymess
@winkyblinkyandstew @astarionhistears @valsilverhand @drunkchasind @themermaidriot
@pinkyjulien @skelior @medtech-mara @lokiina @timaeusterrored
@tokyofuturnoir @aggravateddurian @sifofasgard @elfjpeg @aurorartz
@lucky38-2077 @dustymagpie @gloryride @stannussy and anyone else who wants to! Also pls DM me if you don't wanna get tagged🖤
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ms--lobotomy · 3 days
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How do you think the other primarchs would react to say konrad, mortarion, or peterturabo getting a significant other before everyone else
Hi! I did a poll to decide who to write for, and Konrad won fair and square! I'll write Mothman someday I promise Here's your food.
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Summary: Horus and Fulgrim come into contact with Konrad's new partner.
Content Warnings: Fulgrim existing except Horus is more annoying because I like to write him as kind of a dick, uncomfortable social situation, Konrad is also a bit of a silly billy because I am unwell
Image Credit: @squishyowl
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You'd been wandering the Imperial Palace for hours now. You'd tried to backtrack a few times, but it had never worked. This wing was a lot more refined than what you were used to, with gold tastefully added in where it accentuated a particular piece. You reached out your hand to touch one of the ornate picture frames, you couldn't help yourself. The metal was smooth underneath your fingers, cold to the touch.
You heard their footsteps before you heard anything else, a pair of them. They were far too heavy to be that of baseline humans, or even space marines. You ran towards the noise, ignoring their idle chatter. If Konrad wasn't in the mix, they could at least give you directions back to his wing of the palace.
"Hello?" you asked, dashing around the corner.
You recognized the violet armor of the one on your left first. Fulgrim. You took a step back without thinking about it. You knew he was closer with Konrad than many of the others, but there was something about his presence that was unnerving. Almost as if he was too perfect. To the right was none other than Horus Lupercal, arguably the most important of his brothers with his fancy Warmaster title. He sported clean teal armor and stood slightly taller than his brother.
Fulgrim spoke up first. "Ah... you're my brother's partner," he remarked. He stepped up slightly closer to you, and you backed away.
"It's strange," said Horus. "I never expected him to be the first of us to get a partner, but here we are. How is he treating you?" He stepped up to come side-to-side with his brother again.
"Oh," you said, shuffling your feet. "I mean, I think it's pretty nice?" you asked. "He's--"
Horus cut you off with a chuckle. "Imagine that," he said, turning to his brother. "What do you think, Fulgrim?"
"I think..." he said, putting a finger to his lips and looking down. "I think that we should let the little one get a word in, don't you think?"
Little one? "Sure thing," said Horus. He looked down at you expectantly.
"I..." you started. Sure, they were around twice your size, but did that give them the right to... it was too much effort to contest it. It was probably best to just head back on your own. "I guess he sometimes just pops up out of nowhere, uh... I just wanted to know how to get back to his wing, honestly." You turned around to retrace your steps yet again.
Horus stepped in front of you. You looked behind you, and Fulgrim had that pleasant smile on his face that almost never left.
"We haven't seen you in person yet," remarked Horus. "Why don't you stay and talk for a little? I'm quite curious to know how our brother is as a partner," he said.
"Uhm..." you started, looking to the side. I can tell, you thought to yourself, though you wouldn't dare vocalize it. "I... he..." you started, sinking back into yourself. You felt your face go warm, and you fiddled with your hands. Horus looked down at you expectantly, a dickish smirk on his face.
You heard your name from a familiar voice. You snapped your head around to see none other than Konrad, hastily adjusting his armor. "You got lost," he said. You nodded, closing your eyes. "I see you've met my brothers?"
"Your partner is a delight to talk to," said Horus. "They should stay on Terra a while, I'd like to get to know them."
"I think they'd like to go," he said curtly. Horus stepped out of the way, and Konrad grabbed your wrist. You felt Fulgrim's stare at the back of your head, slightly bemused. "Isn't that right?"
"Very well," said Horus. "Talk to you later, I should hope?"
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lixielovess · 2 days
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"and i still dont care, i only care about you and how you feel. if it meant that I'd have to kill everyone in the world except for you and then myself just to prove that i love you, then I'll do so."
hyunjin x fem!chubby!reader
warnings: reader is insecure about her body, implied ED, swearing
genre: angst, fluff
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hyunjin was a childhood friend of yours, you always hung out with him and you enjoyed being around him. but you were always considered the 'ugly' friend by your other friends, sometimes your family and you yourself agreed sometimes.. ofcourse he never did, he thought you were absolutely beautiful, tough he never said it.
when you were in junior high school, you could never be friends with anyone without someone shipping you two, but with you.. everyone always considered it as a joke. like you were a joke, people kept teasing hyunjin about liking you and he always denied it, and you believed him. he was never harsh about it he was genuinely nice, he was always polite with it but it always seemed to hurt you. you loved him, and deep down he knew he liked you aswell.
he was the handsome popular guy and you were just another one of his fangirls who just happened to be one of his friends. though you did have girl friends alot of girls seemed to hate you because you were friends with hyunjin, saying that you only hung out with him to distract yourself from how fugly you actually are. and honestly you thought the same, it was to the point you starved yourself and had to go to the hospital because you didn't eat the normal amount of food a healthy person should eat for about a month, but despite not eating almost anything at all you still looked like that.
and suddenly when you were in highschool in senior year when in the schools garden, he stood infront of you, bouquet in hand looking straight into your eyes "y/n y/l/n i-... i loved you.. i always have.. so please-" you cut him off. "is this some sort of joke..?" he froze up, confused, time seemed to stop as he just stared at you completely confused "what?"
"did one of your friends force you to do this? did you lose a bet? do you think its funny 'confessing' to the ugly chubby girl?" you we're used to it, guys confessing to you, going out with you because it was a dare or a jokey joke. but its happened to you over and over again for too many times to the point where you couldn't tell the difference between that and the real thing... and when someone actually had feelings, that someone being hyunjin, you turned him down because you didn't trust anyone that said they liked you, either way if it was true or not.
"Y/n-" "save it." angry tears welled up in your eyes as he just stared at you in disbelief "listen! please- im not joking! i genuinely do-" you grit your teeth, holding in your tears as you try not to break down sobbing "i thought you were my friend, hyunjin."
"i am! and i want us to be more than that-"
"Liar! you don't like me, i know you don't. you denied it since we were 10 and even until now you still do. feelings don't change overnight. i cant believe i thought you were my friend, never talk to me again you piece of shit" you ran off into somewhere, you dont know where you just walked. a few hours later you somehow arrived home, you waltzed into your room and just locked yourself in there.
days go by and you return to school completely ignoring him, everytime he came to talk to you, you just brushed him off like he was nothing.
your friends still hung out with him, and they brought you along when they hung out with him, but what else could you do? not hang out with your friends who've known you for years..? no. eventually you forgave him and tolerated him, and started hanging out with eachother more and more.
it wasn't until recently when you guys were alone, he took your hand and looked straight into your eyes when he confessed, again. "i.. i just wanted you to know that it wasnt a joke, i genuinely did love you back then and i didn't care about how you looked you were absolutely beautiful regardless. and i still dont care, i only care about you and how you feel. if it meant that I'd have to kill everyone in the world except for you and then myself just to prove that i love you, then I'll do so."
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mhsdatgo · 3 days
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The Helaemonds/Helaegons need to calm down.
Don't get me wrong, it's always refreshing to see some people fill in the gaps of a basically untold relationship such as the one between the green kids in general, but this goes beyond basic obsessive shippy discourse. Leave this poor girl alone. Why's there an obsession with having her be romantically paired with her brothers, one worse than the other?
I understand the show has basically shown so little of her to the point where we didn’t even have a coronation for her on screen, so therefore you can self insert through her and have fun with headcanons regarding Aegon and Aemond. Really, I'm not faulting their girlies, you can be head over heels for whatever actor in character you want (unless you put them on pedestals and start acting like they did nothing wrong and pounce on whoever contests them, THEN we have a problem) but I assure you, Helaena would barely want anything to do with either of them.
Aegon is a sex pest turned sex offender, a drunkard and a neglectful father and husband at best. Her infamous toast in ep.8 has us believing that he cannot for the life of him interact with her unless he's horny drunk or that he forces himself on her at worst.* He was ready to leave them all in ep.9 before he was caught. Even the book is subtle about their relationship: all we know of them is that they sleep in shared chambers, that she was someone important and reliable in Aegon's council before B&C, and that he named her and Alicent the true Queens of his reign.
*(⚠️TW: PERSONAL OPINION⚠️ I'm not saying this last one isn't a possibility but it's sill outrageous for the way people speak about Helaena in defence of this "claim". No, she wouldn't joke about her own r*pe in front of the whole table full of people she doesn't know and right beside her abuser, and despite the hour-long metas I've read about how she's basically "too sheltered" to know what r*pe even means, I assure you she's a high-functioning autistic, not 5 years old. She can understand it perfectly.)
Helaemond is a pure show invention, I honestly wasn't expecting this many people to go up this kind of train. They barely interact, and most of the time it's Aemond saying he'd "perform his duty" should Helaena ever be wed to him, or that stare in ep.9 when he enters her chambers toiling after Alicent. It's, as always, the Aemond girlies who think poor Helaena would live her best life with Aemond, or that they are already romantically involved behind the scenes. The amount of "if one possesses a thing, the other will take it away" edits from people that are FULLY CONVINCED "the thing" is Helaena and that "the one" and "the other" are Aemond and Aegon respectively is honestly concerning.
Fics that are all about Aegon doing the worst and unspeakable things to her so "Aemond can come and save her" are y'all okay? Out of all people, HE has to save her?
Babes, I'm sorry to break your bubble, but this isn't Aegon IV/Naerys/Aemon on steroids. Aemond didn't give two shits about Helaena. No, he wasn't jealous when Jace came to ask her to dance, he just wanted to stir some shit. If we talk about the books, he didn't fucking hesitate to leave King's Landing, his sister, his mother and whatever he was doing for the Riverlands the second he heard that Daemon was there. And he brought the only means of defence they had with him. If he knew how important Vhagar was for the city's defence, he's evil, if he didn't realize it, he's dumb as fuck. Which one is it, Aemond girlies?
People beat each other to the curb about Jaehaerys, Jaehaera and Maelor's paternity like it's the Wars of The Roses. They put Helaena and Alys against the other like they have personal beef with one of them.
Stop mentioning this sweetheart only when it's about praising or hating one of her brothers. No, it's not the only option you have because she's underdeveloped as a character. There's actually another one.
LEAVE HER THE FUCK ALONE.
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cuubism · 11 hours
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Hey, i hope i'm not being super annoying by asking this but do you ever plan on finishing 'In Waking Dreams'?
This fic is probably one of my favorites of you (along with 'some kinda benefits', 'The Apocalypse Is Nigh!', 'my eyes are up here' .... honestly if i go throught all my bookmarks we would be here all day, your writting is just that incredible aksjka) and it has lived in my head for so long, i love how hob's initial reaction to the news of "you have a husband" is simply oh fuck yeah, i love the whole set up of the marriage just happening because dream said yeah sure why not, what could ever come from this? and then slowly actually falling in love with hob, i love the tenderness that which you write them with when they actually reunite and just, i really love the whole fic 😅
So yeah, i hope you find in you that Dante Alighieri spark of fanfiction inspiration to pick it up again it one day, is a really good story ^w^
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
i am, yes! i've been ever so slowly working on it
i often find that after the climax is the hardest part of a story to write, especially if it's a really obvious and delineated climax like 'hob rescues dream' - before that you always have the climax as a north star, if you start getting lost you just remember that you're supposed to be going in that direction, but afterwards it's like... where does it go now? there's a lot to wrap up and you want to try to do it organically, not just like... infodump all the answers to the outstanding questions XD so i'm slowly poking away at that.
this is making me think that i should probably just write the very last scene of the fic (don't know what that is yet) and then i'll have a new north star...
but here's a small bit from the beginning of the chapter
--
Hob’s home was in a bit of a state, thanks to all the crazed research and rescuing he had been doing. Books and ledgers left open, a mug of tea still cooling on his desk, jumper thrown across the couch instead of put away. He tried to remember, as he led his husband to bed, hand low on his back to guide him, if their home in dreams had ever been in such disarray. Home was a bit of a nebulous concept, in their dreams. They had had many different houses over the years, the details of which were hard to remember upon waking. Really, home was the man beside him, an inexorable force that drew Hob back, across landscapes and time, from cottage to manor to palace. King, he thought, it coming to him again, the way dreams appeared and disappeared as context called them. The ragged, slumped form of the creature beside him, leaning into Hob’s side for support. Hob remembered taking his hand, pressing his lips to those fragile bones. My king, he’d murmured, at his side, in bed, like he was in a fairytale. A king would have a kingdom. A kingdom of dreams? His king of dreams turned to him as they stopped by the bed. Now that the rush of power, of darkness, had bled off him, he looked haggard, swamped in Hob’s coat, which was still all he was wearing. Strange, so strange to be here, in Hob’s so ordinary bedroom. Not the half-remembered palace of a hazy dream-life, but just here, standing by the bed. Hob, and his dream-walker. He had come to him, hadn’t he? Once, or so he’d said. Hob didn’t remember the specific instance of someone ringing his doorbell and not being there, but he could imagine it. God, if he’d been just a moment sooner in opening the door. If his Dream had been just a moment sooner in knocking. “Hob,” said his husband, in his solemn, sleepy voice. Hob had missed that voice. The dreams he had had of him, the ones that were memories, were never quite the same, never quite right. He said nothing else, like Hob’s name was all he had wanted to say. So Hob said it back—“my Dream”—and the softening of his husband’s face was worth everything.
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watcherintheweyr · 3 days
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i think your idea that viserys named naerys after rhaenyra it's so sweet, i'm crying it rare seeing such lovely post in this fandom especially about viserys since for some reason people say he hated his mother
do you have more ideas or headcanon like that? if you do i would love to know
People only think Voserys hated his mother bc they have poor critical thinking skills. He and Aegon mourned her their whole lives. She loved them and raised them to be phenomenal princes and kings. I don't particularly like Viserys II but I can't deny he's effective.
As for other similar headcanons... hmmm....
I think Rhaenyra and Daemon would've had more kids if they'd been able- and girls would've been names Visenya, Alyssa, and Aemma.
I think Rhaenyra specifically.picked Mornong's egg for Rhaena because the lovely pink and strong black made her think of her stepdaughter.
I think that while Baela and Rhaena obviously love and miss their mother and carry many of her traits, I think that while Baela is Daemon's mini-me, Rhaena is Rhaenyras. I've had that hc since the book- and in the show, Rhaena often matches her dresses to Rhaenyras, and from what we've seen of her in s2 she's started styling her hair similarly to how Rhaenyra did at her age, and appears to be wearing Rhaenyras gold necklace from her wedding (or a very similar one!)
Rhaena had six daughters with her second husband and I firmly believe that while Baela named her daughter Laena, Rhaena defied political niceties, and named one daughter Rhaenyra. And perhaps another daughter was named a feminine version of Lucerys- to honor her first betrothed, who she clearly had a good relationship with.
I think that Luke and Rhaena would have made a fantastic Lord and Lady of the Tides- and Baela and Jace would've been among the best rulers Westeros ever had.
I also will die on the hill that if she hadn't been so deeply sabotaged and destroyed by grief and betrayal, Rhaenyra would've been a solidly good queen.
I think that Cregan, Jace, and Baela would've been the OT3 to end all OT3s and I honestly think Cregan mightve considered staying south to be Jace's hand, if things had played out differently.
I definitely think Aegon3 wanted to name his sons for the brothers he lost, but was pressured out of it due to the political unrest. And honestly, sadly, I do think Viserys would've been the one to dissuade him, and that likely would've deeply damaged their relationship
I headcanon that every time Rhaenyra had a child, Syrax laid a clutch- their bond is shown to be so deep to the point that they share paim, and Rhaenyra shows a deep love and respect for Syrax. Honestly all of team Black show their dragons a lot of love and respect- unlike team Green who sort of just use their dragons as tools of war and naught else.
I think if things hadn't ended how they did, Aegon 3 would've claimed Grey Ghost. Their personalities suit one another so well! Rhaenyra would've been so proud, and Daemon would've helped him every step of the way. (Side note, @spreta-invidia wrote the Best aegon3 fic quite literally ever, and he and Grey Ghost... 👀 anyways you should read the fic)
Idk I have a lot of Targaryen headcanons, particularly for Rhaenyra and her family bc they're my favorites of House Targaryen. If you'd like any more feel free to shoot me another ask- but I tend to kinda error 404 when questions are vague so if there's anything specific you'd like to know my headcanons about that'd be super helpful lmao
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fictionfixations · 2 days
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masquerade malleus vignette
(spoilers for glorious masquerade)
aww
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i refuse to believe lilia is oblivious enough not to notice that they dont like his cooking
..although solomon (from obey me) doesnt notice either iirc, but i mean..
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..sebek. in a vignette, you literally got his help in cleaning a stain from malleus' labcoat???
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...i never thought id hear azul say those words.... what?????
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i dont know how it didnt hit me until now but the only reason rollo's plan in glorious masquerade failed was because he was so insistent on having malleus there and taking away all his power and shit?? like. cause. none of us had enough magic to actually overpower the fire lotuses(? i cant remember what they were called), although yuu would be able to make it through with no magic how could we even fight rollo at the end??
and at the point it reaches malleus and he could do something about it, it'd be too late?? because i REALLY doubt he has enough to reach all of those flowers and with enough to completely fry them out. and i doubt the bell would reach it by then.
silver...
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is azul even human?? im like pretty sure-ish he's not human. not even half human. just entirely sea creature with a human-like body to probably be treated more normally and not hunted for sport/food through evolution shit idfk (like. idk im pretty sure its a thing where pets look so much cuter to cause us to take them in and shit.)
anyway im just imagining sebek talking azul's ear off about how great malleus is because he finally has a buddy who understands and therefore would be willing to listen to him talk for hours straight about malleus's greatness. AND APPRECIATE IT. HAUIHDSUIhd and azuls just like ………………….. floyd and jade laughing at him from a distance azul sets sebek on them like 'i think those two should come to learn about malleus's brilliance, don't you think? after all, as my colleagues, it is such a shame that they don't share my admiration for malleus, and i am unsure how to put it into words, as malleus himself is so magnificent that even words fail to describe him properly. so sebek, my fellow appreciator, would you lend me your aid in helping them grow to appreciate his brilliance?' okay i ran out of words and started repeating them because ic ant be bothered to look up for synonyms, im not THAT into it okay
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ahhh so it is a fleur city song i wasnt sure. ive read in fics that it was, but it was also those fics where songs either have power, or yuu knows a bunch of disney songs that are considered 'forbidden/forgotten songs' or something like that and i cant remember which it was
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actually if they put in all that work beforehand i think i get why they were so insistent on waiting for rollo to either confess or not AFTER the social ball and after they left and everything LMFAO
they suddenly changed into their school uniforms (still in diasomnia)
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i honestly wouldnt know if id trust lilia that much but sure (i hope it doesnt turn to perfectionism levels tho)
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first time we encounter italicized text i think. huh.
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lmfao
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oh my god (no but why choose idia at that point?? is it cuz his voice meshes well with them??)
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ayoo its playing the make a wish (i think thats what the song is called) instrumental in the bg ive heard it way too many times not to recognize it (and sung along. its so fucking cool)
damn
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my hands are actually protesting now ah geez (i took a break)
I GOT SO DISTRACTED BY DEUCE (i was re-experiencing enjoying looking at everyones costumes again) I AM AN IDIOT (its lower in opacity to show you that you're on it in the editor)
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ooh
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i didnt notice the insert paragraph im sorry lMFAO but id forget if i didnt SS it then
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ooh some malleus riddle bonding
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AH ITS A YUU JUMPSCARE
that seriously startled me like suddenly i just hear footsteps and then BOOM OPTIONS
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ayooo malleus and yuu dancing
(alsoo yuu and deuce dancing :D)
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WOOO
okay. now.
i feel like. im doing really good progress tackling all the vignettes (currently in EN. after that's GloMas, & Book 6 and 7. ive been avoiding it because not all of the Backgrounds exist, and GloMas has options with completely different dialogue which I can't see them all. i have three different videos of GloMas gameplay but they dont show all options...). all thats remaining is azul's tsumsitter (i have a vid of his vignette. ..i just dont like doing the tsum ones because i never know how to describe the tsum moving) vil birthday bloom (i FOUND A VIDEO finally oh my god. i love doing birthday vignettes) malleus dorm uniform (I have a vid) sebek new year (i have a vid) grim labcoat (i have a vid)
and then the rabbit costume ones which all of them have vignettes iirc and i have videos for all of them (i actually just found them as i was writing this. thank you god. they have no views tho geez. wonder if that means vil birthday bloom exists in a video but just wont appear. this is future me. ...i have been blessed with vil birthday bloom.)
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coffee-bat · 7 months
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has any human ever actually seen a salamander irl btw
#they're like a cryptid to me#i've known about them since early childhood. i've known what they look like and that they live in the mountains.#i honestly really really wanted to see one as a kid#and i've been in the mountains so many times. hiking on non-touristy trails that should be okay for seeing wildlife. i've spent so much-#-time in the mountain woods and canyons and rivers and quarries#and never did it feel like a place where you could realistically see that thing#i know all the theory. i studied fucking zoology. i know it's just a normal ass amphibian#but for some reason i just. can't imagine seeing it? can't imagine it existing somewhere and just walking around like that in the woods#it feels like a mythical thing#hell it feels like i'm being gaslit by everyone saying they're common in the mountains#how is that thing common. how is that thing even there#my brain riots when i try to imagine a salander just being irl#y. you feel me#i don't know how to explain it they just feel like a fictional thing that you can't actually meet or see or touch#ramble#hello welcome to my Salamander Thing that i've never actually told anyone about lol#i have zoology autism 😔#so i read everything i could on the topic since i could read and out of all the animals i learned about these fucking things just always-#-stuck out#like i'm reading a 'polish fauna' book and everything's normal and as expected then suddenly there's a bright yellow-black lizard there-#-that doesnt fit in with anything that lives here. what do you mean this thing exists HERE and youre telling me its common#where. where is it.
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uzu-hime · 7 months
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So like legit how does one make friends when they are
-too adhd for normal people
-too depressed for adhd people
-poor (no money to do things or go places)
-25 on the outside, single mom for 10+ years on the inside
-so so lonely but so so afraid of adding anyone else to the "only want to hang out with me when you need free therapy" group that includes everyone I know
#i want friends#but i don't know how to make them#or where to find them#im too weird for a lot of people and too introverted for others#and for some reason everyone i do befriend always ends up being basically my therapy patient#or they only ever want to hang out on their terms which... don't exist#side eyes my friend who always says 'i miss you guys we should hang out' in the group chat but then turns me down#for her boyfriend every single time i try to make plans#'he works night shift i have to clean during the day' girl are you his girlfriend or his maid??#if you don't want to hang out with me just fucking tell me instead of playing cinderella all the time#my mom says i should get out more and do more things but honestly i live in bumfuck ohio#what things????#rural america is a nightmare for being social if you don't have money and also don't want to hang out at your local high school#i can't even go to the park in town by myself because too many women have been abducted there#im not making this shit up#i just want someone to sing silly songs with me and try on stupid outfits just for fun and go to new restaurants#no one has ever heard of and sit in the woods in silence for a while and maybe take a nap together and compare grov#*grocery lists and just.#why is it so hard#what is wrong with me that the only friends i have only like me sometimes#even my mom who likes me all the time won't even go shopping with me anymore#she's too burnt out from working#maybe it's not me#maybe im just another victim of capitalist america's isolation#even then i don't know what to do about it. my cat helps but im still just. lonely.#im tired of being lonely#vent post#ignore me
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jacksintention · 11 months
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I'm thinking again on the fact that so often comments, criticism and readings on Jack dwell a lot on how he is barely human/a person/doesn't have a personality at the point of the story and, while I somewhat understand these points, I find them so lacking. I find them... ableist? I'm always doubtful to use the word here because I'm not sure if it's applied in this kind (mental health) of context, but something like that. And I find them extremely simplistic.
However, honestly, a big part of the reason for these readings being so popular is that the manga itself words it that way. But that's one of the problems I find in the manga. When I say P.andora Hear.ts is very good but unfortunately it is very manga-like at times, besides the 2000s homojokes and the like, I'm usually thinking about things like this. I feel like often characters and situations that are (potentially) very intricate instead of getting insightful deep overviews often get screwed by the writing itself, which falls into very manga tropes a lot in a bad way (not that every manga has to fall into them, or that every manga trope has to be bad or written badly).
I don't know... For instance, I'd argue R.askolnikov's capacity for love in Cr.ime and Punishmen.t is debatable, but it's never treated as if it made him less of a person, a human being or made him not have a personality. I'd say not even Svidrigailo.v, who is as much a Bad Guy™ as a character can be, gets that treatment by the writing. I'd say that even him or Mikol.ka are written as fully fleshed human beings with their intricate internal lives and feelings. Svidrig.ailov's last scene with D.unya is fascinating for both characters and spins the whole dynamic and makes you question the entire narrative and veracity of not only those two characters, but brings to mind several other conversations among different characters and throws light (and doubt!) on the main plot between R.askolnikov and Porf.iry.
In similar situations, Jack's humanity, personhood and personality are debated, doubted and even full on accepted as vanished. No one reads Crim.e and Punishmen.t and comes to the same conclusions about Raskolni.kov, Svidrig.ailov, Sony.a or Razu.mikhin. The writing doesn't allow it. The writing doesn't allow you to forget that humanity is diverse and multifaceted, that it can be sad and cruel and loving and monstrous, even all at the same time, or that a person may struggle with feeling at all; and one is still a person.
#This honestly is one of the things if not The Thing that frustrates me the most of P.H#I've seen this kind of 'that's not a person/human/doesn't have a personality anymore' readings with The S.tranger by Camu.s#And they were imo also simplistic (and that's coming from someone who didn't like the book)#They were also made by my Ethics professor in college who was from the O.pus De.i#Anyway this is a post because I imagined I wouldn't be able to fit everything in the tags#I should probably delete this later#but I wanted to get it out of my system first. I've been thinking about this a lot again after reading the guides and I got angry again#I don't think manga as a medium necessarily has to treat characters this way#but there's often a big simplification of characters in general in a particular flavour#And I think Jack (arguably Vincent too) suffers from this. The exact same thing happening with Jack could be written slightly differently#and cease to have that shonen manga for edgy teens flavour it gets in like two pages#that doesn't ruin but definitely stains a 104 chapters characterisation that was so well crafted#(especially given most fans take everything at face value without thinking much about anything like vacuum cleaners of text)#I don't know. Despite how this manga is a lot about humanity being able to exist or take place#beyond the conditions of one's existence being “fake” through our actions and relationships with others‚ ourselves and the world‚#I don't like how characters like Jack are treated in that context#I understand why it's done and what it's trying to say‚ the Jack/O.z foil is super interesting in that regard. I don't even think#the writing fully falls into the mistake of 'thinking' Jack is not human/a person. But I find very unfortunate some of the writing choices#when dwelling on this‚ and even so distasteful at times#And as a consequence many fans just take the slippery slope and make a cardboard mimicry out of some great characters#But the manga/writing concedes a bit with that angsty teen air. And it's frustrating#I talk too much#Trying to pseudocensor words for the first time#to see if this way my 4am soliloquies won't appear in the tags of people just living their lives#Tumblr please let me rant about nothingness that interests only me without disturbing anyone please#I'm already mad I can't tag these at all anymore in my own blog for organisational reasons without them appearing for everyone everywhere
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fearandhatred · 4 months
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guys hear me out i feel like some things are said or done either because of ignorance or bigotry, and i do think they are two different things and that to some extent ignorance can be excusable. but being unwilling to learn from your ignorance is in itself bigotry. in my opinion
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leatherbookmark · 10 months
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hopping around different blogs is fun.
a post on blog 1: i find it a little weird that -- don't get me wrong, the barbie movie looks great with all the doll-like details, i bet the actors had great fun and i'd like to see it myself, but -- people are getting excited about marketing of this movie. they're acting as though mattel's 3985* deals with 837* different companies are something new, exciting and creative instead of... 3985 deals with 837 companies spanning many different areas! this movie is a commercial for a doll! isn't this kinda weird?
*numbers made up
a post on blog 2: i don't think any sane adult doesn't realize that this is a toy commercial! it's rather obvious.
a post on blog 3: boo hoo 'the barbie movie is capitalist propaganda' i don't give a SHIT marx won't fuck you. did you do this for transformers too? do you think only stupid girls who like pink need the reminder?
like, oooooh! things are happening!
#shrimp thoughts#earlier today i got into a bit of an essay reading spree (as much as my brain allowed me lol)#and it got me thinking about like... associating oneself with products/aesthetics/companies as a way of self-creation#this is me. i love [fashion brand] you won't catch me without my k*nken and here is my room in which you can see posters of [movies]#it's very... human to get excited about things and feel it more the more others get excited because. community building#at the same time i've noticed it myself that it's so much easier to label yourself a [thing] girl than to like... Look Into Yourself#who am i? what defines me? these questions are difficult because how do i know that? with what means do i obtain this knowledge?#should i create myself as i want or should i observe myself with the eyes of others instead? ...let me just say i like plants and overalls#and i feel like when someone says something you perceive as a critique of the identity slash community you associate yourself with#it's... hurtful? but at the same time. hm. i don't know actually#like chances are these posts are talking about completely different things and not vaguing each other or even similar posts#maybe posts that blog 3 vagues really were obnoxiously condescending! who knows! that being said DESPITE being a small-brained#shrimp who would honestly love to win soooo many moneys and just do whatever i want all day instead of being an Independant and Competent#Expert In My Field (this sounds scary and stressing). i still would like to avoid falling into the 'just let me ENJOY things and don't try#to make me hate femininity because it's not working! pink and shopping can be empowering' hole.#idk!! i listen to k/pop and am part magpie. i can't quite pose myself as like anti-capitalist intellectual#but i do want to achieve at least a small brain! someday!! and boy do i hope my brain energy days don't end before the books arrive;;#2am thoughts. wonder if my mother goes to sleep earlier than at 4am today because its getting annoying
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pierswife · 1 year
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You see, the real April Fool's joke was Vash's placement on my F/O list.
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This right here? A farce.
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Now this? This is the truth.
#I have known him for a little bit more than a week but please know i love him very very much#I may call him mr cringefail loser wet napkin of a man but truly and honestly I love him very much#he's been through so much more than any one person should every have to go through and he is through and through a very gentle soul#he also very badly needs a hug and to be told that everything is gonna be okay#he's honestly what's been helping me get through the day because I'm going to be 100% honest#I have been so incredibly burned out with no time to rest and a lot of the things I enjoy were starting to feel dull cause of the burnout#but starting trigun and seeing this funny not so lil guy kinda brought a spark back to things?#tbh i think i just needed something new to get into#but still he makes me feel so many butterflies and brings new feeling of excitement to life because holy shit i have something new#and it's something that checks all the boxes for me#I very rarely will watch things on my own and I have been watching with friends#but I find myself going back to episodes that we've seen already and rewatching them because of how much I enjoy them#and the manga has been SUCH a fun read so far#and I'm ngl I haven't read a manga on my own without being prompted to in YEARS#so it... admittedly feels very nice#I feel like I'm 20 again and playing EO2U on my own and just enjoying myself#and 2020/2021 was a very low point for me that EO2U helped me cope with specifically#and not to say I'm as low as I was then and that I'm at a low now but I do feel super burnt out and having something that I enjoy#and don't feel bogged down while doing it? feels super nice#dhgfsd don't get me wrong I love all my other interests very very much#but imma be real with y'all whenever I go heavy into resident evil posting that's when I'm at my most mentally ill/lowest#and that's when I go and sit down and play that fdhjskgbfs(unless I'm asked to by a friend or once in a blue moon I just really wanna play)#which recently has been I want to play for enjoyment thank goodness#fbdhjsfvbsdjhi anyway vash the stampede my beloved thank you for bringing a new spark to life and help make things less dull for me <3#sweet little bumblebee
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luvwestwood · 3 months
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"AFK" - Choso Kamo (with twt links)
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"..like fortnite, i’ma need your skin.."
3,012 words.
warnings. nsfw(18+), bf/gamer! choso, oral sex (m rec.), humiliation, desk sex, exhibitionism, trying not to get caught, feral choso, p in v, throat fucking, oral sex (m receiving), overstimulation, degradation, choso whimper links included lol,
notes. my previous drabble abt choso had a lil kick to it, definitely had to make it into a full one-shot! hope u guys enjoy, and thank u for 450 followers hehe, so I included twt links! ^^
credits to @/plutism for dividers, @/adrienwithane for banner.
russian translation by @juliabelll ❤️
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Not too long ago, it was Choso's birthday. Being an amazing girlfriend you are, of course you built him a brand new PC. It cost you an arm and a leg, but that didn't matter at all when it came to Choso. Seeing him happy itched a part of your brain, especially when he was the one who would pay for everything: dates, your online shopping carts, you name it.
He never really bought anything for himself. You were getting tired of the countless times that he went on a tangent about how slow his previous machine was. It was doing your head in, so you saved up. For what you now call a 'not-blessing-in-disguise'.
Choso was obsessed with his new PC, and it wasn’t an exaggeration. Part of you was starting to regret it all. The man barely paid attention to you.
Am I the asshole for being mad that my boyfriend likes his gift a bit too much? No, I wouldn't think so. I should be delighted, but it's pretty much getting outrageous.
The fact that he has almost every single game out there on that PC in just a span of one week since he got it - means there's more for him to do. Every day, he'd wake up, do a bit of house stuff then sit his ass down to play with his friends. For as long as he can. Never leaving that room. Hell, he wouldn't even bother answering your messages until an hour later. 'Mb, was on the game' is something that was engraved in your brain by now.
Every time you'd come over, he'd ignore you simply by just gluing his eyes on the screen. If you try to nap, just go home. You've lost track of how many times he's managed to wake you up with his blood-curdling screams. There were times when Choso didn't even notice you leaving, which upset you quite a bit.
Of course, you had moments when you needed him the most. Like, badly. Freshly shaved, he's not even mentally there to take a peek. You could be naked and oiled up in his bed, Choso wouldn't even bat an eye.
…Advice to self, don't get him a PS5 this Christmas.
"Choso," You called out, sat on the edge of the bed behind him. No answer. Per usual, you wanted to rip that headset off his head.
Dark circles were forming around his eyes, endless cans of monster were scattered all over his desk. "Nah let's just fight Oscar, we've got a minute until the circle closes."
Rolling your eyes, a scoff escapes your mouth. Aaand he didn't hear you. Crossing your arms, you furrow your brows. He was honestly testing your patience. "Choso?!"
Choso flinches a bit, pulling one side of his headset away from his ear. His gaming chair spins around to face you. "Baby?"
He knew you were mad. You looked more than pissed. It was really because this recurring behavior of his was getting too much. "Your eyes are always on that screen! Did you even know that I was here!?”
“I-I’m sorry. Look, I'll get off after this game!” From his headset you could hear Choso’s friends teasing and picking on him. They probably heard you scolding your poor boyfriend. You couldn’t care less.
As soon as you were about to speak, he immediately spun his chair back around to face that stupid monitor again. He was too engrossed in the game. It was his squad of four against the only opposing team.
Groaning, you flop back onto his mattress. "..You always say that, and you never do." Muttering under your breath, you stare at the ceiling blankly. What felt like a hammer to your head, Choso's war cries could only get louder each second.
The past few days, you had no choice but to use your own fingers to toy with yourself. You were needy, and you missed your boyfriend's touch. Too bad he was too occupied. How come his keyboard and mouse get to be touched by him more than your....
Using all of your strength, you sat yourself up again on the edge of his mattress. Realizing there's no use in scolding him, you quietly walked up behind Choso, combing your fingers through his hair. You loved when it was down, and he loved it when you played with his hair. He found it relaxing. You could tell by the way his body was no longer tensed up, the back of his head falling heavy onto your hand.
Your hands left his hair, travelling down to his nape. With your freshly manicured nails (which he paid for), you gently scratched his skin on his neck. You could see goosebumps forming, but said nothing about it. Choso who was ticklish, tilted his head to the side - "Mmm," He hummed, telling you off as you were starting to distract him.
Letting out a laboured sigh, you stared at the back of his head. Wondering what to do with him, you pouted. Maybe I should just leave like every other day? No, I can't back down.
He seems really busy. Would he even notice if I crawled under his desk? Grinning, you got on your knees, crawling like a kitty underneath his desk but making minimal noise. You glanced behind your shoulder to see his reaction, but his eyes were still gawking at the flashing screen in front of him.
Coming face to face with his sweats, you kneeled, just in level with his lap. Peeking your head out from the shadows under his desk, Choso had only noticed you then. His eyes widened, the sight of you looking up at him like a puppy had started to cloud up his thoughts.
Grabbing onto his wrist, he slowly let go of his mouse. Bringing his hand to your cheek, he took it in the palm of his hand, eventually giving in and using his thumb to softly caress your lips. "..I missed you, Choso.." You whispered, softly sucking on his thumb. "..I need you,"
His breath hitched, your words were doing something to him. What a fool he was for ignoring you all this time? Just then, a cacophony of voices screaming through his headset broke him out of his trance. Choso's warm hand left your face, causing you to frown. Your fun was cut short. Way too short.
You had enough, deciding it was time you finally got what you wanted. Snaking your two hands up the soft cotton of his sweats, they stopped right at his crotch. His eyes anxiously shot down to you underneath him, telling you off and pointing to his headset.
Placing a finger onto your lips, you told him to just be quiet. His eyes frantically flickered from you, then to his monitor. Slowly, you slid down his pants. Smiling at the way he rose himself up from his seat slightly, so it would be easier to take them off. Of course, he wasn't wearing anything underneath.
Taking his long, thick cock into your hands, you jerked it ever so slightly. Choso cleared his throat, keeping his mouth shut all of a sudden in case he accidentally makes unwanted noise. He was practically melting under your touch, into the chair. Gliding your tongue over his pink tip, he didn't dare look at you. Not long after, your warm mouth wrapped over him, Choso letting out a sigh of relief at the feeling.
You knew how to push his buttons, bringing yourself to fully deepthroat his cock for a few seconds. His lips purse shut, Choso slightly biting down onto his bottom lip. His fingers started to press on the wrong keys, unable to focus on the game.
Pulling away, a string of saliva connected your tongue and his aching tip. You brought your lips back onto his cock, bobbing your head and hollowing your cheeks as you used your two hands to jerk him off at the same time.
The man above was folding at the pornographic sight underneath him. Hearing Choso moan by accident, he quickly covered it up with a cough. “…Yeah, no, I’m good- Just don’t- feel well..”Friends concerned, Choso had come up with a convincing lie in just seconds. His hand reached down to rake through your hair until his fist was full of it. [link]
He lightly pushed your head up and down his length, your mouth making sloppy noises all over, buckets of spit dripping down your chin and his balls.
Ripping his headset off, Choso didn't care about the game anymore. Or his friends. He groaned as you fondled with his balls, giving them a suck afterwards. His light grey pants were turning a darker shade than before. His two hands clawed into your hair on both sides of your face, Choso started to fuck his cock into the back your throat.
Moaning, his eyes shut tightly as his head fell back onto the cushion of his chair. His balls tightening as he heard how you constantly gagged over his thick cock. "Fuck.. Just like that.."
His moans were a mixture of curses and long groans, tears started to well up in your eyes. Choso opened his eyes again, looking down at you as he drew your mouth away from his cock. He smiled, seeing your makeup all ruined, your face covered with spit and so did his lap.
Rolling his chair away from the desk, he grabbed you from underneath. Only to pull it back again, placing it in front of his PC. Guiding his hand on your back, he bent you over on the chair, making your two legs kneel on the soft cushion so you wouldn't tire out. [link]
Holding tightly onto your hair, your head fell back towards him. Choso had ripped the fabric of your leggings that was unfortunately covering your cunt. Grabbing his cock, he lined himself up with your hole, his hands shaking from how eager he was.
Easily sliding in from the slick that covered your hole, you grabbed onto the arm rest in front of you; Choso stretching you out completely. Wasting no time, he began to move his hips back and forth, fucking his hard cock into you.
His monitor started to gently shake from how hard his cock was bullying into you, skin slapping as his balls that were full of weeks load cum made contact with your clit.
"C-Choso.." You cried out, your hand reaching back to his pelvis. Staring at yourself getting fucked like a slut through the reflection of his PC monitor, your ass rippled with each and every one of his thrusts.
Maintaining his brutal pace, his fingers were no longer woven into your hair, reaching out to the headset on his desk. Confused, you kept your eyes open to watch Choso place them over your head. "W-What..?"
His hands gripped onto the flesh of your hips, Choso leaned into your ear. "Keep moaning you slut, let them hear you." All of a sudden he groaned, feeling you clench around him at what he just said. "You like that, don't you?"
Spinning you slightly to one side, his leg went up onto the chair with you, allowing him more leverage to fuck you deeper. "Eyes up at that camera too, show them how pretty you look taking my cock," Tears started to stream down the sides of your cheeks, your face had flushed red.
Choso's hands took a hold of your hair again, his tip kissing your cervix repeatedly. "I.." Speechless, you lost your ability to form a basic sentence. His fat cock left you braindead, at this point you were seeing nothing but stars.
"..Use your words baby," A creamy white ring started to form at his base as his cock pistoned in and out of you. Choso's hand kept stamping down on your back from time to time to make sure you kept that arch. "..Isn't this what you've been wanting all week?"
"Y-you're so deep.. I can't.." Your hand reached back to his abs, twisting the white fabric of his tank top until it was all wrinkly. He took a hold of your wrist, twisting your arm behind you. Choso slightly bent over, his warm body resting against your back.
He quietly groaned into your ear, chanting your name like a prayer. You were fucked out of your mind. "You feel so good.. like this pussy was made for me." The pace of his thrusts slowed down, but his hips still rut into you hard each time. His strokes hard and deep, you swear could feel him all up in your guts. Your jaw had dropped, your head falling back onto his shoulder.
Choso's hands reached under your loose shirt, letting your tits spill out of your bra. Gently twisting your nipple between his finger tips, fondling with your whole breast afterwards, he forgot how much he loved wrapping his mouth around those.
"Your cock.. It feels so good.." You babbled, Choso sneaking his fingers underneath to rub lazy circles on your clit. Your legs began to tremble, fortunately your throat managed to choke out a whine.
Also seeing him in the reflection of his monitor, strands of his hair started to stick to his face. Multiple beads of sweat had formed on his forehead. Choso didn't want to leave your pussy. Not even Thor could pull him out. He enjoyed using you like a cock whore.
You felt so dizzy, mind full of his cock. Choso let out multiple whimpers as he felt his orgasm nearing, his index finger hooking onto the side of your mouth. The very last few seconds, his cock bottomed into you, trying to chase your orgasm. The desk hitting against he wall non-stop, his headset that was on you started to fall off your head.
Leaving a trail of wet kisses down your back, his hand grabbed onto the plush flesh of your ass, continuously giving it a spank every now and then.
The wet, slapping noises of your skin continued to follow, until you felt his thrusts come to a sudden halt. His hot cum shooting inside of you rope after rope, just before he pulled out to let the rest out onto your ass. "..Fuck.. look at that."
Using his thumb to spread your hole wide open, his load spilt onto the black leather of his gaming chair. You panted, tired and hole throbbing. You got what you wanted, that’s for sure. Forcing his headset off you, you couldn't do anything but lean against his desk, trying to regulate your breathing pattern back to normal.
"..We're not done here," Choso laughed behind you, your cunt still dripping of his thick load. His hands roughly turned your body around, placing you on top the desk to face him. Using his foot to push the chair away, he lined his cock with your hole again, using his cum that was already inside of you as lube.
"Oh m-my- Choso!" You yelped, one hand taking grip onto his shoulder for support, the other holding knocking his keyboard out of the way, trying to find something to hold onto other than his shoulder.
His forehead rested against yours, the staggering movement of his hips causing the desk itself to shake under the two of you. Choso watched as his cock disappeared in and out of your hole, grunts coming out through his clench teeth as he wrapped his large hands around your thighs. He wanted more, and wasn't going to stop anytime soon.
"..Good girl," He gritted through his teeth, "..I love t-this pussy, and you." Choso's hands pressed flat against the desk, his lips locking onto yours. His cock was coated in a mixture of his and your own cum, your sweaty bodies intimately hugging against each other.
Choso wanted to feel all you, he just craved more and more each minute. His hands shakily held onto the sides of your waist, his lips moving to your jaw to plant more kisses.
"You're so beautiful, look at me baby." Choso lightly tapped the side of your face, telling you to maintain eye contact.
Obeying, you kept your eyes open; looking into his but not a thought behind your own eyes. You only continued to whine under his touch, overstimulated from how much he's used you like a cock whore. You were so close to losing your mind, drunk off his cock.
Choso too, was lost in your pussy. God, was he whipped— If only he could stay inside you forever, he definitely would. This whole time he was busy cursing at himself, how much of an idiot he is to not appreciate what he has - you. Your cheeks were stained with your hot tears, Choso hushing you and wiping them away every now and then.
“S-Shit, I’m gonna cum again.” He pants, feeling his balls tighten for the second time, the tightness of your pussy heightening his stimulation.
Your hands cupped both of his cheeks, pulling him in for a kiss. His thrusts turning sloppy, you cooed. “..Cum for me, I want it all inside..”
This caused the coil inside of Choso to snap, him desperately whimpering into your ear as he hid his face in the crook of your neck. “F-fu-ck..” Tightly holding onto the flesh of your hips, he made sure his second load stayed inside of you.
Sliding his cock out, Choso rested his heavy cock just above your pussy. Making sure he planted a peck on your forehead, trying to catch his breath. The two of you laugh, your bodies aching and sweaty, his entire desk and chair a mess.
Reaching for something, you blinked as Choso grabbed his headset that ended up on the other side of the desk. Placing one side against his ear, he spoke into the mic. "..GG."
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⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⤳ © luvwestwood ‘24 all works are owned by me, and originally come from my own head. please do not re-post on a third party platform without my permission!
⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⤳ as always, thank you for the love on each and every one of my posts! it means the world to me 🎀🩷
[luvwestwood masterlist]
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sttm99 · 5 months
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Part 2 here!
'Fuck.'
It had been just two nights since you'd given him head in the dark of his dorm room, and Bakugo hadn't been able to rid his mind of the sensation ever since.
He knew it was stupid to even agree to it. You were the one girl in class he felt comfortable enough to talk about anything with. Be it grades, his fears and even more sexual topics. It also helped that he knew you wouldn't ever judge him for anything.
You were his closest friend; more so than Kirishima. And he liked that... he liked that he has someone he could trust with his life, someone he could relate with so effortlessly.
And you felt the same way with him. You told him everything; every little secret, every dirty detail, and he never laughed or judged.
Which was why you both were in his room, many hours past his bedtime, sitting opposite each other on his bed as you recounted your most recent almost-sexual endeavor.
"-and it was so awkward cause it was just hanging there in my face and I didn't know what to do." You groaned out, with your body hunched over, face covered with your palms as you recounted your experience in the school's storage room with a General Studies boy you'd been seeing casually.
Bakugo chuckled at your demeanor from where he was. "Yeah then maybe you should have stopped him when you saw him undoing his fucking belt."
You glared at him through the cracks between your fingers.
"Seriously," he laughed. "If you didn't wanna give him head, you should have told him the moment you entered the closet."
You groaned and fell back unto his bed. "The thing is I want to do it."
You turned your head to stare up at Bakugo.
"So why didn't you?"
You groaned again. "I don't know. I mean... look, I wanna be able to make the guy I like feel good, you understand. And I really thought I wanted to give him head, but then he was pulling his jeans down- and I was getting cold feet and then he pulled down his boxers and I wanted to run away right then....
"But I pushed through- and I got down... and it was just staring at my face and-"
"Maybe you just don't wanna do it." Bakugo raised his brow, cutting you off from your rambling.
You frowned. "Maybe. I mean, I think about giving head...and I wanna do it, and then I get an opportunity and I panic. You're probably right."
There was silence for a moment, before Bakugo shifted in his position, pulling his knees higher up, closer to his body, and leaning his forward.
"Or maybe... you don't wanna do it with him."
You furrowed your brows. "Meaning..? I don't really like him or what?"
Bakugo shrugged, "I mean, do you?"
You began sitting up. "Don't I?"
"Come on, Y/N." He raised a brow, giving you an unimpressed look, "You don't even text him unless he texts you."
"Yeah because he's always texting me."
"See! You even say it like you're frustrated." Bakugo jutted his arms out at you.
You paused, sitting up and pondering it.
Bakugo groaned. "Listen, I know you, okay? You- frankly, you're horny... more so than most people-"
You scowled at him.
"-and the fact that you don't even let him put his hands under your fucking skirt most times should tell you that you're probably not all that sexually attracted to him."
You stared at Bakugo, eyes narrowed as you began to see his point. "I guess you're on to something."
"Look," he began, "I honestly think you're just with him because of how aggressively he pursued you. And that's fucking dumb."
You pouted. "I guess... so now I have to find someone else to practice head with."
"Why do you wanna learn how to give head?" He laughed.
"Cause the girls were talking about giving head one time and I wanna be able to join in conversations." I groaned out, exasperated, and flopped back unto your back.
Bakugo took a moment to look you over, before adjusting his shorts and clearing his throat.
"I can give you pointers if you want."
Silence.
"What?" You mumbled, sitting back up, with your weight on your palms and narrowing your eyes at him.
He scowled at you. "I'm not repeating myself."
You rolled your eyes and hissed at his stubbornness. "You idiot."
"But..." You started slowly. "If you're offering to give me tips on sucking dick, I don't mind."
He shifted a bit. "Yeah... well- it'll only work if you're sexually attracted to me. If not, it'll just be like with that guy earlier- and shit would be awkward." He was looking away now.
"Wanna find out?"
And that was how he found himself heaving against his headboard with his shorts and boxers flung at the far end of his bed.
"Shitshit- fuck Y/N."
His hands were fisted into your hair, knees raised in the hair and thighs spread on either side of your head, as you laid on your stomach before him, nose pressed into his dark blonde pubic hair and lips wrapped tightly around his dick.
His eyes were blown wide, lips parted as grunts forced their way out his mouth.
It was just bordering on too much; the sensation of your mouth, and he'd suddenly realised how seriously you'd taken his analogy.
-"Consider it a bottle of smoothie or something, and there's that chunk that can't pass through the bottle mouth properly, so you're trying to suck it out." He'd said, holding his already hard dick against your cheek.
"That sounds stupid, Katsuki." You retorted, as you scowled up at him.
"That's the best I got, I ain't some sex therapist, okay!"-
"Oh shit- you're good," he groaned out, head thrown back and thighs quivering. "Fuck- fuck! Fuck, you're fucking good, baby. Just like that, yeah..!"
His grip on your hair tightened, pushing you down on his dick so he could feel the sliding of your tongue on his shaft as he dipped into your throat.
It didn't help that you were drooling all over him- and yourself-, your hand cupping his balls and squeezing softly.
He was going into overdrive, thrusting up unto your mouth, his eyes rolling back as he slipped down your throat over and over again, and he moaned as he felt you gag, your throat constricting against his tip.
He brought his head forward to peek over at you.
"Slut," he groaned out, eyeing your positioning; one hand infront of you, playing with his balls, and the other stretched underneath your body, fingers dipping into your sleepshorts. "You fucking slut- you like this shit, don't you?"
You moaned around his dick, vibrations coursing round his veins and your eyes looking up to meet his; lids hanging heavy and pupils blown out as you sucked on his cock.
He came heavy- hard. With spasming thighs and choked out groans as he spurted his seed down your throat.
It was a lot... too much. He kept spurting out his cum and his sight was blurry as he looked at you.
Now he couldn't look at you without remembering your stupid, fucked expression when you were between his legs. And it's weird, because all you're doing is grinning an Sato as you hover around him whilst he bakes.
It's stupid. He knows it is.
You don't even like him that way.
Part 2 has been posted here!
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clairenatural · 6 months
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Dean doesn't like the word "boyfriend." He decides this the second time Cas says it–the first time it was new, shiny, exciting. The second time, he fights the urge to cringe.
It's not the "boy" part. It's not. It would have been, for a long time, but he's dug all that shit up and unpacked all the suitcases. They hold hands in public. They kiss goodbye in front of his coworkers at the garage.
It's just–not enough. Not nearly. Jack comes home from hanging out with his friends and fills Dean on the gossip and his boyfriend and her girlfriend and–that's not them. "Boyfriend" feels like a cheap mockery. Like how demons used to tease.
He's heard "partner." He's heard it from Sam, to Eileen, but he doesn't know how he can stomach it. He's said that word too many times. I'm Agent Tyler and this is my partner, Agent Perry. This is my partner, Agent Page. My partner, Agent Stills. All lies. Sam says he likes it, that he's making it mean something real. Besides, Eileen loves it.
Good for them, Dean thinks. It makes his skin crawl.
So he sticks with “boyfriend” and he shrugs off the funny urge to protest every time Cas says it. It makes him happy, and honestly, it’s not like he has an alternative.
It’s a Sunday when he realizes that somehow, Cas does. They’re at the farmer’s market, like Cas is every weekend, but Dean had picked up weekend shifts and missed the past few. Cas is excited the whole way there, telling Dean about how he’d manage to befriend the local honey vendor in his absence, how she’d invited him to a beginner’s apiarist group she helps run. They beeline (heh) to the honey booth as soon as they get there, and the woman--Judith? Janice?--smiles up at them both, hands Cas a jar of honey like she’d been expecting him, and says “Oh, this must be the husband! I’ve heard so much about you.”
Dean stares at Cas. Cas stares at the honey. Judith/Janice stares at both of them, smile fading as the silence goes on a beat too long. 
Dean clears his throat. “Uh, yeah. The husband, that’s me! Ha ha.” Beside him, Cas relaxes, just barely. In front of him, the woman breathes an audible sigh of relief. “Sorry,” Dean shifts. “Just didn’t, um. Realize I was such a hot topic.” 
The smile he gets is almost sympathetic. “Oh, only good things. Here,” she hands him a business card. “You should also come out to our meeting on Wednesday. Lots of people bring their partners.” She leans in, almost conspiratorial. “Beekeeping can be wonderful for couples.”
It’s at this point that Cas clears his throat and finally looks up from the honey in his hand, evidently giving up hope on escaping this conversation. “Thank you, Janet.” (oh. Janet.) “Dean works late on Wednesdays, but I’m very excited to see you all.” He’s pulling out money as he says this, apparently deciding to just go ahead and end the entire interaction. He hands her the bills, grabs Dean’s hand, and is already moving away from the booth by the time Janet calls “See you Wednesday!” after them.
Cas drags him all the way back to the car without stopping for tomatoes, or Sam's carrots, or the free-range eggs that are way too expensive but Cas buys anyway because you can taste when the hen is well cared-for, Dean (whatever that means). They slide into the car, still not talking, and sit in silence for several long seconds. Dean stares at Cas, who stares out the windshield at the parking lot.
"I can explain," Cas speaks, finally, right as Dean was about to open his mouth and say anything to break the silence.
Dean pauses. Can you? Cause I feel like I missed a few chapters, he thinks.
"I don't work late on Wednesdays," he says instead.
"Oh." Now it's Cas staring at Dean, and Dean staring out at the asphalt.
He turns the keys. He drives them home.
Later, making dinner, Dean rolls the word around in his head. Husband. He's making his husband pasta (It's missing the tomatoes. He's made more with less).
Husband doesn't feel like a costume, like an ill-fitting suit and scratchy tie. It doesn't feel like high school gossip, or a monster trying to hit him where it hurts. It settles in warm in his chest.
It's just the two of them that night, and they're eating in the comfortable silence of the bunker until Dean clears his throat and brings it up. "Why does Janet at the farmer's market think we're married?"
Cas pauses, fork of pasta halfway to his mouth. He puts the fork down and takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry."
"I'm not mad," Dean hurries to clarify. "It's just that there's usually, uh. Steps, you know. Like a whole....thing."
"I'm aware." Cas sighs. "She assumed, seeing us around - the first time I spoke to her without you, she asked where my husband was. And I..."
"You didn't correct her?"
"...No. I, um." Cas is looking down at his plate again. He picks up the fork, still half-full of pasta, then puts it back down again. "I didn't want to?" He says the end of the sentence like a question but looks back up at Dean and squints just a bit, and Dean knows he's watching for a reaction.
"Uh huh."
"It felt trivial."
"To tell her we're not married?"
"To call you my boyfriend." For the first time, he stumbles over the word.
Dean blinks. "You--" he stops, brain processing too much information to finish that sentence. "Okay." He leans back in his chair. Sighs. Rubs a hand across his eyes and lets it drag down his face. "Okay, listen. I don't like boyfriend either, but we gotta...talk about it."
"We are talking about it. You don't like it either?" Cas leans forward as Dean slumps back, following him across the table.
Dean snorts. "No, man." He shakes his head. "It's been a decade. I've seen you die." Six times. But who's counting.
"I agree." Cas pauses, and then, as if it's the most natural conclusion in the world, "Will you marry me?"
Dean actually laughs at this. "You're asking me that now?"
Cas quirks an eyebrow at him. "I've grown quite fond of calling you my husband at the farmer's market. I'd like to continue."
Dean stares at him in disbelief. It's not how he'd pictured it going, but he also can't think of it going any other way. Slowly, he nods. "Yeah, okay. Let's be husbands."
Across the table, Cas grins at him.
"But we're getting rings," Dean points a finger at him, because something about this is going to be normal.
"If you'd like. Although I already told Janet that you can't wear a ring because of your work at the garage, and I don't wear mine in solidarity."
"Rings," Dean insists, and decides to overlook the rest of that sentence. For now. He stabs his fork into a pile of the pasta. "And let me stop for the damn tomatoes next time."
They get rings and wear them on chains around their necks. Cas puts a beehive on the hill, and there's a small ceremony in the summer - a "vow renewal" to Cas' beekeeping group, who all receive invites attached to little jars of honey. Janet gets the nicest one.
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