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#he has so many aliases....
nervoussubject9000 · 2 years
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strangetown but as oingo boingo songs
thx for the idea @disjecta444 . these are just my personal hcs but I'd love to hear what you guys think
loki beaker - weird science
circe beaker - not my slave
nervous subject - just another day
pascal curious (he was kinda hard to get a read on.) - gratitude
vidcund curious - on the outside
lazlo curious - bachelor party
general buzz grunt - no spill blood
ripp grunt - wake up! (it's 1984)
tank grunt - little guns
buck grunt - reptiles and samurai (I just think they'd like this song!)
pollination technician #9 - nothing bad ever happens to me
jenny smith (she was also hard to get a read on, idk if I like my choice.) - whole day off
johnny smith - only a lad (I think he'd like this song)
(afraid to say I'm leaving out jill because I literally cannot find a song that reminds me of her or that she'd enjoy)
olive specter - noone lives forever
ophelia nigmos - where do all my friends go?
ajay loner - outrageous
chloe curious - goodbye-goodbye!
lola curious (I sorta chose this at random) - my life
erin beaker - new generation
kristen loste - glory be (I also chose this at random, I think she'd like this song though.)
bella goth - home again
dominic newlow - just a human (listen this is technically a danny elfman song but I love it too much to not include)
(last but not least, our iconic gender ambiguous-) grim reaper - dead man's party
(I really hope you guys liked this, it literally reached 30 tags.)
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pachimation · 1 year
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new year, new you,,,,,,,
ITS SCARA’S BIRTHDAY WHOOOOOOO 🥳🥳 thank you for being born you have infested my thoughts for the last year and a half like a cockroach and i literally cannot get rid of you no matter what i do <3
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xenomorphicdna · 7 months
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Map boi is back with more map
This time it's the ★exterior★
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It's not as nice looking as the interior, (which you can find → here btw) but i think it's bigger as a region.
I will be making at least one more, and it will be of Two Birds' can because it's got lots of rot bits and that sounds like fun to design.
Pearl dialogue and some rambles below the cut↓
I know I said dialogue but fr look at this
THE DIFFERENCE in canvas size here
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Pearl dialogue for both of the two regions
Bright Pink pearl dialogue when read by Veil Of Dreams:" What is it Mouse? Oh a pearl, alright I'll have a look. Ah this one is one of mine, it contains various notes regarding Four Blue Flames when he was still being constructed. It was actually a personal request of mine to have him built, his technology is better than mine in practically every way and he makes for a great research partner. I admire his work ethic, but I do wish he took breaks. After our creators' Ascension he's only become more wrapped up in the Great Problem, I worry for him. ... There is nothing more on this pearl that would interest you, you can have it back, I do not need it."
Bright Pink pearl dialogue when read by Four Blue Flames: "Hello Mouse, a pearl? Let's have a look. Hm, where did you find this? It's encrypted so I cannot read it to you, but I can guess that it was written by one of us. Unfortunately, I am of no use to you, but if you like pink then the pearl would make for a great decoration. Or alternatively, you can trade it to the scavengers. Of course, they will ruin the pearl like they do with the rest but if you are in need of explosives the scavengers excel in their creation. Now if you do not mind, allow me to get on with my work."
Deep Red pearl dialogue when read by Veil Of Dreams: "Rodent, you've got a pearl, allow me to read it for you. Oh, this one holds digital copies of several pieces of literature, I was missing many of these from my memory banks. I have them saved now, but I do not like the implications of this. Please Mouse, take the pearl and bring it to the library in the Capital."
Deep Red pearl dialogue when read by Four Blue Flames: "Oh a pearl, let's see what it says. This one is filled with all sorts of religious literature, it's rather old, from the Green hegemonic linguistic dynasty. It contains texts for meditation and prayers and various forms of religious guidance. I actually did not have this archived, so I appreciate your fondness of treasure hunting, you are a great help. I think this one would fit nicely in the Capital's library, please, bring it to Veil Of Dreams and he will guide you from there."
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tizzymcwizzy · 2 years
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not to be like im obsessed with another blonde boy but im obsessed with another blonde boy DGDGHDFHHF
since classes are finally over i can DRAW FOR MYSELF WITHOUT GUILT!! YYEEAAHHH LET'S GOOO
hunter with this fit was such a look and so fun to draw honestly,, for those that don't know this is based off a drawing dana did where hunter goes to grom
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non-un-topo · 1 year
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Longest hype-up ever
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guttersniper · 4 months
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mutt taking the name daniel in instances where he needs a “Real” name, but still wanting to be referred to as mutt because, despite everything, that is his name! means a lot to me. (and now he’s got to experience the Full Name Card – or at least the [admonishing/warning] Daniel card – being pulled on him for the first time at some point. have fun with that, scamp.) the Very Implications behind him choosing and having that name in the first place generally means he’s been in a stable environment for quite some time → now has papers and Exists To The System → which he has mixed emotions about but that’s a different story and one you can all probably guess why anyway
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saisons-en-enfer · 1 month
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Inmesher
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kingdomoftyto · 2 years
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I’m finally reading Arsène Lupin: Gentleman Thief and I’m losing my mind a little bit. I can’t believe this 115-year-old book is making me laugh out loud multiple times per chapter.
I figured out the trick in chapter 2 really quickly and then got to delight in the rest of the shenanigans from the criminals’ perspective. Then Ganimard shows up to interrogate Lupin in his prison cell and every single word they exchange is solid gold. (Lupin just keeps laughing at his own jokes while Ganimard glares at him, and it only makes it funnier.)
And then the reveal that he got away with it all is delivered via goddamn magic trick with a telegram inside a hollowed-out eggshell, which is just, *chef kiss*
And THEN as Ganimard turns to leave, Lupin is like, “Wait! How did your watch end up in my pocket? Haha whoops, bad habits. Anyway, here you go; it’s not like I need it... seeing as I already have the judge’s watch right here!!”
In the next chapter he breaks out of a prison transport vehicle, goes directly to a cafe for a drink and loudly announces his name to the manager, and then casually walks back to prison and demands to be returned to his cell. A few weeks later, he escapes for real by tricking the authorities into letting him walk out unmolested.
And in the last chapter I’ve read so far, Lupin gets robbed on a train and uses the police to help him corner the thief. Then he throat-chops the guy into unconsciousness, takes his stuff back, and leaves a generous tip for the police officers to find when they catch up.
In short, he’s a horrible gremlin of a man and I love him
He’s much, MUCH more like Kaitou KID than I ever expected
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frozenrose20 · 12 days
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I've done minor character headcanons so prepare for my gods headcanons
Apollo naturally has golden eyes but he realized his father hated his eyes because they where the same shade as kronos. Because of this he tries to always have sky blue eyes in honor of his father. He also tries to pass it on to his kids in hope his father will be kinder to them......it has never worked but he doesn't plan to stop trying.
Hermes and Dionysus were very close during the prohibition era. Dionysus threw the parties and Hermes supplied the alcohol their fake mobster aliases are still well known in New York to this day.
While Hermes was the one to invent the internet many of the other gods were trying to race him to get out their versions first but you cant beat Hermes in a race. Athena is still salty to this day
In the old days Artemis would normally stay in a form that was the same age as her brother but when she realized that Zeus and her brother took her side more when she wore a youthful appearance it became her main form.
Zeus favors his daughter more because he doesn't think they can over thow him.
When it come to daughters Persephone is Zeus' least favorit because of all the chaos her marriage caused. its why he sits her next to his least favorite son (Apollo)
Aphrodite was very vocal in the civil right movement because she is love and beauty for all aspects and races.
These are it for now <3
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lucluvr · 7 months
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good girls get exactly what they want
ft. zhongli, alhaitham, welt, and jing yuan
he thinks you’re the sweetest girl he’s ever had. a man of principle keeps his word: his good girl gets what they want!
afab chubby reader / heavy praise / teasing / fingering / oral (f!receiving) / a lot of sweet words / nipple play / use of “sweetheart, baby, honey, puppy, etc” reverse cowgirl / dumbification (if you squint) / very soft and sweet <3
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zhongli:
humanity was an interesting concept to zhongli. being thousands of years old, living amongst the liyuen people under many aliases, zhongli has had lovers come and go. he loves passionately and deeply. when his tongue ribs circles over your clit, the pressure of his hands on your hips make you whine.
in his thousands of years of experience, zhongli realized each of his lovers found pleasure from different things, however, he’s never had a lover lose their mind so quickly. forked tongue licking up and down your slit as your slick coats his chin messily.
zhongli’s amber eyes gaze into yours as he restrains your wrists against your hips. whines and soft pants fall from your puffy lips (sometimes he bites when he’s excited)
“li! please sto-“ he lets go of one of your wrists as he slides his finger into your mouth. he slides it all the way to the back as your eyes roll back. the gagging sound has zhongli crawling back into the warmth of your cunt.
“shh, just enjoy it, darling.” he’s always put your pleasure before his. your hands wrap around his wrist, trying to pull his fingers out of your mouth, but he slides a finger inside of you and you’re gone.
a muffled whine comes from you and zhongli gazes up at you again. his lips suck on the puffy pearl between your labia. he watches as your eyes roll back again. he feels your thighs cover his ears and he takes this as a sign to. start savoring the taste of you. he hums against your clit, making your soft thighs shake around him. he removes his finger from your mouth, placing it on your hips. his thumb lovingly brushes against the chub of your stomach.
your hands cover your eyes, back arching into him. he feels your muscles contract— you’re close. he opens his eyes to find your hands again. he pins them to your sides as your twitch and convulse around his fingers and tongue. he can feel you holding back.
his fingers curl upwards, making you shoot upright, but he pushes you back down. tears prick at your eyes as you hiccup wetly, begging him to let you cum.
“please, lili!! need to cum…” your words turn into mumbles as your sweet release is so near. “been a good girl, please lili…” your sweet and whiny tone has him smiling and humming against your clit once more.
as your eyes roll back into your skull, white splotches stain your vision and before you know it he’s sent you over the edge. zhongli detaches himself from your cunt, a string of saliva following his lips.
his wet lips kiss your inner thighs, squishing the soft skin under his fingers.
“my good girl,” he says in his baritoned voice. his words send butterflies into your tummy. without any warning his lips secure themselves back onto your clit. you jolt, your legs pushing on zhongli’s shoulder, but he’s quick. he catches your ankle as tears prick at your pretty eyes.
he tuts, kissing your ankles. he trails his kisses up your calf, into the underside of your knees. he pushes your knees to your chest, having you hold them in place. you sniffle as his thick fingers come back to bully your clit.
“so pretty, baby. be good for me, yeah?” you shake your head and whimper.
“too sensitive, ‘li! no ‘mre…” a soft pout appears on your lips. he chuckles and kisses the tears away.
“my sweet girl, you can take it baby. be the good girl i know you are, okay?” his honey coated voice makes your head feel dizzy. he trails kisses down your soft tummy and thighs before finding his rightful spot again. his hands push up your knees again.
his tongue swirls your clit again and his fingers are back to being pushed into your cunt. he curls his fingers against that spongey spot, making you see stars.
zhongli’s dealt with his fair share of bratty lovers who fought tooth and nail about obedience, yet you? you’re his best girl, his sweetheart. no one has ever been as pliant and as sweet as you are to him. he thinks that all good girls should get to cum hundreds of times, and zhongli will do exactly that. he is a god and his word is final. so if he says his sweet baby gets to cum until he gets her brain all jelly— so be it <3
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alhaitham:
alhaitham has never found much interest in relationships. he doesnt go out of his way to interact with others, he doesn’t care much for people anyway. he doesn’t need anyone anyway when he has a wife waiting for him at home. the one who makes him chai every morning, wrapping him aloo filled roti parcels for lunch, the one who massages his shoulders when they become far too sore.
he adores his wife and he’s very open about his gratitude for you. it’s become a routine at this point. anytime he is required to stay in the desert for an extended period of time, he demands you to be seated on his face whenever he comes back.
in the words of the acting grand sage, “it is the least i can do for you.” however you think that he does the absolute most. his hooked nose bumping against your clit makes you bite your thumb as you hover over his soft lips. alhaitham grumbles in annoyance. he kisses your shaky inner thighs softly,
“habibi, sit. it’s okay.” he tries to comfort the anxiety you get every time he does this. his thumbs rub comforting circles in your hips, urging you to sit on his face. his mouth waters at the sight if your clit peaking out from your puffy lips.
“dont wna hurt you, haitham.” your lips curl into a frown as you put your weight into your knees. he kisses your inner thigh, biting them gently. to tease you, he blows cool air onto your clit, making you whine. you press on his head, “stop!”
he shakes his head, “please, baby. let me do this for you…you’ve been so good for me, please?” his voice has a slight desperation to it. it’s as if he doesn’t get to taste you on his tongue in the next few seconds he will go insane.
he’s right though. you’ve been incredibly patient with him. you’ve been at his side while he adjusts to his new job, and casually overthrows the government. due to the whole fiasco, he hasn’t had the time or energy to do anything but kiss you. sure it made you a bit sad, but when he found out he gave you the night of your life. and now he’s lying under you practically begging to make you feel so good, who are you to decline?
“but kaveh…” you mutter into your palms. “what if he hears?” you ask him, voice wavering. he sighs as he rubs his nose into your thighs.
“to hell with him. this is my house. if he had a problem, he can move out.” he grumbles against your plump skin. he kisses the skin once more before turning to you. “come on habibti please?”
he scoots you closer to his lips. he leaves the softest kiss on your clit. “promise you won’t break me,” he kisses the swollen bud again. “i’ll make you feel so good, baby. ‘m so sorry. lemme make it up to my good girl, yeah?” he mumbles into your skin. you have half the mind to question if he’s even talking to you.
his tongue peaks out from his lips, gently licking the bud. he then takes a deep breath and goes for it. his free hand parts your lips, his tongue swirling around the bud, dragging down to your hole. he sees you clenching around nothing and he coos softly. he prods two fingers inside your hole. your whines and gasps urge alhaitham on. he curls his fingers so nicely, your body shivers. you grab onto his hair, tangling it between your fingers.
your cunt is so wet and so sensitive. having your husband between your thighs, making you see stars after weeks of needing him makes you cum so quick. you don’t even see it coming. alhaitham drinks down any slick that comes from you, lapping it up like a thirsty dog.
he gently lifts you up, laying you back down on the bed. he stands tall and proud above you, removing his fitted shirt. one of his hands intertwines with yours, making you smile. his hands travel up your body, squeezing your soft flesh under his big hands.
“my pretty wife. my girl,” his lips suck on the soft skin of your waist. he makes you giggle as he prods at your ticklish spots. your sweet laughter makes him smile. “i love your laugh. i love you,” he whispers against your lips before stealing a kiss from you. you happily wrap your legs around his hips and your arms slide up his broad shoulders.
with his free hand, alhaitham unbuckles his belt. he throws it somewhere and unzips his pants. he pulls his cock out from his briefs, rubbing the tip up and down your slit. he teases your clit, tapping the tip against the poor bud.
you whine against his lips and buck your hips against his. he chuckles sweetly. (a noise only you get to hear from the sage) he presses the tip against your hole, making you furrow your brows. it’s a bit of a stretch, alhaitham realizes as he watches your face.
he reaches down to rub your puffy clit again, helping you ease into his cock. he hears you whimper and whine below him and he smiles against your skin. his lips leave a trail of wet kisses and bits down your neck and chest. he kisses around the areola of your chest. he elicits more whines and needy pants from you.
alhaitham leans up, looking down at your body. he gently pins your wrists about your head. his eyes are as soft as cotton. the sweet smile on his lips, the adoration in his eyes and the thin viel of sweat lining his forehead and collarbone make your heart flutter.
he’s gorgeous, tall, smart, handsome. he is the perfect man. he leans back down, kissing you on your lips. he hands leave your wrists, finding a new home on your hips. his thumbs run over the fat of your stomach, making you whine against him.
he smiles, thumbs pressing into the skin. if he had to pick a physical trait of yours he loved the most, it would be that. he pulls away from your lips, kissing down your body. he pays extra attention to your chest and tummy.
in the meantime, he’s been pushing himself slowly into your sweet, warm cunt. he sighs aloud as he sinks himself in. he watches as you rock your hips, needing him. he completely pulls out and then thrusts right back into, making you yelp.
he flips over, pulling you onto his lap. he watches as you bounce on his cock, hand pressed to his chest. you gasp and moan shamelessly as you bounce on his cock. his hands grope your stomach and thighs, squishing the skin between his big hands. he coos out sweet words,
“fuck, you’re gorgeous, mahiya. keep going, baby.” he rubs your clit with his thumb, “use me, baby. do it,” and you do just that. your eyes fill with tears as you curl into alhaitham. you hide your face in his neck, shamelessly moaning. alhaitham feels your cunt clench around his cock.
“there you go, sweetie. use me, honey. come on,” his eyes watch your tits intensely. he leans up, his lips wrapping around the hardened buds.
“oh fuck, haitham! ‘m gna!” you grip onto his shoulders, vision spotting. he feels your cunt clench around him hard and smiles,
“my good girl. you can do it. come on, baby. cum on me, use me.” the coil in your stomach snaps the moment he calls you his good girl. you gasp and sink your nails into his shoulder. alhaitham hisses and rubs your clit a little faster. he pushes you over the edge and your cum hard.
your mouth is agape, but you can’t hear yourself moan. you collapse into alhaitham’s chest, face buried in his neck. with a few more thrusts, he too cums inside you with a deep groan.
he watches as you push yourself off of him and lay on your back beside him. he rolls onto his side, kissing your neck and cheeks. he gets up from your bed, making you look up at him puzzled. he sinks onto his knees as he parts your thighs.
“time to clean up, yeah?”
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welt yang:
sitting in the same position for a multitude of hours at a time is a grueling task. you love welt dearly, but this is your least favorite request of his. you impatiently fidget with your fingers, knees starting to feel numb.
the older gentleman sits in front of you, sketching out every curve and dimple in your bare body. your cheeks flush deeply as you avoid eye contact with him. he puts his pencil down before calling out to you,
“darling, could you please put your hands down?” he asks you with the softest smile. the creases around his eyes are ever more evident. shyly, you nod your head. you reluctantly place your hands back in position before staring around the room. he lightly chuckles,
“and look at me as well? i cannot sketch your face if you do not look at me.” he is obviously teasing you, but it’s all lighthearted. your lips pout softly before staring up at him with furrowed brows.
“you can’t remember my face?” your voice comes out meeker than intended. he shakes his head, before beckoning you over. with pins and needles sticking into your limbs, you walk over to welt who coaxes you into his lap.
“of course i remember it. i just want to see it. can you do that for me? be my good girl?” he whispers those words into your ears before kissing your shoulder.
“is that a simple enough task for you, honey?” he jests, his grip on your hips tightening. he begins to run his hands up and down you body. he squeezes the fat between his fingers, his lips kissing down you chest and neck.
you sigh into his touch, finally able to feel some warmth. the ac makes your skin burst into goosebumps. welt smiles as he watches you melt into his touch.
“i prefer you like this actually. having you sitting on my lap instead of in the floor, it’s more my style.” him and his stupid puns. you giggle into his neck, the ends of his hair tickling you face. you twirl the ends with your fingers, smiling widely.
he swivels in his chair, turning towards the bed. he lifts you up, hands holding under your thighs. you yelp, arms coiling around his neck. he softly lays you down on the bed. cooing softly at you. laying on his soft, grey sheets makes your eyes flutter shut.
you paw at his shirt, pulling him closer. you lips graze his chin, leaving kisses down his jawline. he hums softly, adjusting his face to look at you, he kisses you soft lips, his mouth tasting like the orange candy he ate a few moments ago.
his hands run up and down your thighs, parting your legs. he grinds himself against your sticky cunt, brows furrowing in pleasure. his breathing becomes a little ragged. you tug at him again,
“welt please,” your whiny voice, accompanied with the way you run your fingers over his bulge has him keeling. he bends however you tell him to, do whatever you ask of him. he nods happily, pulling down the waistband of his sweats. he kneels between your legs as he runs a finger up and down you slit.
wet and sticky slick coats welt’s fingertips. you jerk your hips against his hand as the rough edges of his palm run over your clit. you whine into the pillow set beside you, fingers gripping onto the sheets.
he happily obliges to your silent wish and sinks his finger into your cunt. you happily moan for him, your walls fluttering around his finger. he groans as he watches his fingers sink into your heat.
he pistols his finger in and out of your cunt, curling it upwards once your slick gets onto his wedding ring. he sinks another finger into you, pulling a groan from you. it’s a bit of a stretch, but welt is a patient man.
“you’ve been such a good girl for me, honey. can you keep still for a bit here too? i’ll reward you, i promise, my little fawn.” your eyes flutter open to gaze at his handsome face. your pupils morph into hearts as you nod your head. he smiles fondly, patting your head with his free hand. “thank you, pup.” <3
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jing yuan:
jing yuan’s back sticks to the headboard as his hears ring with the sound of your moans. he watches as you tits bounce in his face, pretty buds begging to be touched. his eyes rolls back ever so slightly when you circle your hips as you ride him. his hand grips your hip, the other attached to your ass.
he hums as you dig your nails into his shoulders, pussy clenching. his thumb rubs lazy circles over your clit. he listens to your whimpers and honey-glazed whines. you sing better than the birds that flock to him, you’re prettier than any person he’s ever seen, you’re so obedient.
being the luofu’s general, jing yuan has learned how to teach others. some people are driven by praise, other by rewards. his reward for you obedience is this: riding him until you’re satisfied. his hand gently cups your nape, bringing you closer to his face. the tip of his nose rubs against yours as he hears the squelches of your bodies.
he becomes astutely aware of how wet and warm you are. he’s very aware of the way your body reacts to his warm hands running up and down your sides. he chuckles at the goosebumps that break out on your skin as he whispers sweet praises in your ears. you curl into his body, shivering like a baby bird. he coos at your reactions,
“aren’t you so sweet, my angel?” he kisses up the side of your neck, nipping at your collarbone. “the sweetest little thing, huh?” his hands pull you impossibly closer to his body, his eyes now trained on where you two connect.
he notices the thick, sticky, white substance that rims the bade of his cock and smiles. “look at me, angel.” he says in that smooth voice of his. you’re too out of it to hear him. jing yuan tucks your hair behind your ears, kissing your wet cheeks.
“darling,” he nips at your ears. he watches the wheels turn in your head as you process his words. your bleary eyes look into his, unfocused and hazy. he grins cheshire, “enjoying yourself?” he asks small and simple questions. you nod your head slightly.
he decides to thrusts his hips up in an attempt to wake you up, and it does just that. he thrusts into your heat swiftly, watching your tits bounce. his pretty lips wrap around the under-stimulated buds, making you gasp.
“yuan,” you say meekly, pussy fluttering around him. he hums at you, his golden eyes looking up. he lets go of your breasts to coo at you once more.
“my precious girl, you’re doing so well.” he kisses your cheeks and lips before resting his back against the headboard once again. he allows you to use him however you please. you’ve been such a good girl, sitting by his feet at his desk and waiting for his attention.
“there ‘ya go, princess. you can do it, sweet girl.” jing yuan smiles <3
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© ilyhaitanii - please do not repost, translate, or plagarize any of my content, and do not repost it to any other platforms.  
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cosmic-waves7 · 10 months
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Jealousy, Jealousy.
Note: I tried Smth new w howl, pls pls lmk if u like it cuz I was half asleep as I typed this out (⁠・⁠∀⁠・⁠)
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He's jealous.
It was only a quick pitt stop at the Wizard Pendragon's shop (one of Howl's many aliases) that set it all off.
A calm morning for the Pendragon's moving household was set to start and the shop needed a bit of upkeep as customers were running dry. So with the creaky floorboards all swept up and Calcifer warned to not misbehave, the clock-like magical device that hung next to the door signalled with a resounding ding and a switch in colour indicating where the castle had teleported to.
There was a long day ahead but you couldn't be more pleased.
As the hours went on Howl worked in rhythm with you as tinkering laughter was heard throughout the shop and bubbling mixtures were stirred harmoniously in cauldrons. There was a calm air to your love as he flitted around you with hands briefly coming to couch and maybe even teasingly squeeze at your hips as he passed.
"Pass me the dandelion leaves ?", He asked while focusing on the lilac fluid seeping from the side of the potion bottle he was pouring into.
You nodded with a kiss atop his freshly midnight-dyed hair - courtesy of sweet Sophie, you know she didn't mean it but you couldn't thank her more for the darkened charcoal colour that had seeped into his golden locks- and off to the ingredients section you went muttering past bottles of all sorts.
Coming back empty handed with no dandelion leaves in sight you let your eyes wander to his sprawled out form in the chair by the fire, Howl only looked up and smiled a bit disappointedly before getting to his feet and tugging on his boots.
You could already see long black feathers creeping out his cloak, predicting his speedy mode of transport for the errand.
"I'll be back in a moment sweetheart, not to worry. Markle will take care of everything."
Knowing full well the small child would've dosed off by now as he'd left to play in the fields while you both worked, you were left to manage the quaint store while Howl flew out for after a dizzying kiss goodbye and mumbles of bringing you wildflowers to carefully twist into your hair.
Then and only then did a customer decide to come in.
He was a polite young man, easily flustered and a soldier of the royal palace you noted due to the bluish uniform donning his slightly hunched physique.
He was nervous.
You grinned trying to ignore his demeanour so that maybe the pink in his cheeks would lessen.
"Ma'am, the queen has requested for a simple sleep draught from the makings of your shop.", He coughed, "please." came soon quickly after he'd recollected himself and pulling at the yellowed buttons holding his vest together.
You hid your smile behind the worn glove that your sweet partner had embroidered a pathetic attempt of a small daisy onto which you very much cherished, it felt like you were talking to a mouse rather than a fully grown man.
"Why of course."
The man...boy even, settled into a lone seat to watch you set up, eventually gaining courage to invite you into bubbly conversation that you found very boring very fast hence weren't all too interested in so short sugared-up answers were all he received.
The 'banter' he thought he was receiving on your end was honestly faked curiousity.
It seemed he was quite dim. Too dim for your liking.
His puny attempts to indirectly flirt were unoriginal and simply unwelcome.
Just as you were starting up your potion with another lame probe on the topic of the weather about to leave the man's mouth, your beloved hurriedly came in. Cheerily he was chattering on about a bird he'd been able to fly up close to in in his bird-like form.
"Oh, you should have seen it's-", Howl interrupted himself to stare at the man sat atop the brass stool across your apothecary tabletop, "feathers?"
His demeanor immediately switched.
Gone was the gentle, patient magician you were so accustomed to. There stood an intimidating wizard and he oddly felt much taller, much more powerful than a split second ago.
This was the Howl Pendragon you'd only ever heard about through word of mouth, not the one that childishly insisted to cuddle up on your ill-fitted couch or cast silly spells to jokingly make your hair stick up in different directions.
No. This was a whole different feel of a person and it seemed like the magic was almost spilling out of him in waves, you could almost taste it's electric crackling force in the air.
He felt more confident, cocky, ready to rip into this poor man down to his basic self-worth.
You liked it.
His lips twitched.
"Darling, who is this?"
Howl's voice was always deep and smooth as silk, just as it was right now, yet you were no fool and could pick up on the the roughened edges of his tone.
But it seemed like the young soldier took no notice of the emotional state of the suddenly very upset wizard in his presence. He only turning around to bow deeply in respect while stuttering out a greeting and an explanation of his presence.
Howl only had a curt nod to give as a reply and you could tell he wasn't very ecstatic have a new face in here.
If he could roll his eyes at the 'competition', they'd roll all the way to the back of his head to see his brain.
The next few minutes were tense as he only grinned tightly and came to your side to place a very domineering palm on your corseted waist pulling you in closer to his warm body, sending a clear message.
"I'm sure you've got this one little potion down love?", He said with his eyes sharply glancing to the young man that had very clearly receded back into his shell at this point.
Howl didn't even need to say a word, didn't even need to properly look at the guard for him to metaphorically back away. But of course he had to ensure he got his point across, so what else could he do but dip down to deeply kiss your lips, he was only seconds away from basically pushing his tounge into your mouth if you didn't stop his dramatic live-performance.
Nodding satisfied with himself, you huffed whispering 'show off' while he stepped back to tend to his dandelion-leaf-less potion.
You couldn't even look up at the barstool your customer sat on anymore with the intense blush covering your face and you could only imagine the agony of embarrassment he was going through.
With the potion sealed up and a-way-over-the-actual-price bag of coins thrown at the counter, he promptly escaped out the door not even bothering to check for any change.
Shrugging you turned back to glare at Howl who was innocently blinking into space.
"Was the last part really necessary."
He slowly smirked, tendrils of his magic swirling past your shoulders.
"Whatever do you mean?"
You quickly found yourself within his grasp, pressing kisses to your knuckles as an apology.
You knew he wasn't sorry at all.
Loud laughter could be heard from a distance as Calcifer moved the castle along to wherever your hearts desired.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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anonymous--person · 7 months
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I made an updated version of my life series spreadsheet for Secret Life! This season officially adds Gem to the cast. I also added a new category for Limited Life since Gem and Lizzie subbed in for Cleo and Pearl respectively for one episode.
Context: It can be confusing to figure out who is in which seasons, especially when you’re just starting out and only know a couple of people. The first names are their usernames, so that’s what will come up in chat for death messages or achievement messages. The names in parentheses are what the other members will call them. Solidarity’s name is Jim/Jimmy, but there’s a running bit where some of the other members call him Tim/Timmy, which is why he has so many aliases. Happy binge watching!!
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shurisneakers · 3 months
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unsolved (iii)
Summary: Bucky doesn't even believe in the paranormal. So who the hell thought it was a good idea to stick him in a series about everything haunted for the internet's amusement? With his loose-canon of a teammate who has no concept of subtlety or shits left to give, to make things even worse. (Buzzfeed unsolved AU)
Warnings: swearing, frustrated bucky at his little shit supreme, obnoxious reader, cryptids, graveyards
A/N: good evening. i am fighting demons (tummy ache). comments and feedback are always appreciated thank u for the love on the series so far i adore u guys sm <;33
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Previous part || Series masterlist
A few days after the first video goes up, Bucky returns from his run to a SHIELD file taped to his door.  
He opens to a black and white photo of him from back in the day, and a page full of his details. Full name, blood group, previous addresses, aliases, best colours to match his undertone, favourite Gilmore Girl boyfriend. 
He flips the page to the section on his known connections, only for a sheet of paper to fall out. Sharpie sprawled haphazardly across it, in big red letters. 
NO AUNT. 
BITCH.
He bites back a grin.
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The video does reasonably well. Not record breaking numbers or anything, but for once there aren’t TikToks of people counting how many times he blinks to make sure he’s an actual human. 
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Always a man of his word, though he has regretted it every single time, he agrees to a second video. It follows after a disgraceful bout of bitching and even pleading, but a few hours later, he resigns himself to his fate silently. 
That is until the schedule for the next video shoot is posted to the server, and he sees it’s at night. 
The night he uses to sleep. The night.
Before he can even type out his rejection, his door receives four sharp knocks. He doesn’t even need to open it to know who it was.  
It’s like you could read his thoughts. Probably could. He doesn’t know the extent of your telekinesis. 
In your hands is a large cardboard box and on your face is a stupidly big grin. 
“Good evening,” you greet. 
“Tell me the show’s getting cancelled,” he says. 
“Nope. We–” you announce, reaching into the box and shoving something onto his chest, “--are going on a trip. Demon hunting.”
“Demon hunting?” 
“To Westley Cemetery,” you add, letting the box tumble onto the floor as you grip its contents. “To catch the Westley Cemetery Cryptid.”
“What the hell is the Westley Cemetery Cryptid?” Bucky demands.
“Creature that lives in the cemetery, watches people from the trees and runs after you if you’re there too long. No known kills, but a couple of scratches and spooks,” you list off. 
His face twists. “That’s not a real thing.”
“Uh, yes it is.” You rest a hand on your hip. “My sources told me so.”
“Who are your sources?”
“Twitter.”
Bucky stares at you without a word.
“It’s totally real. It’s got a Wikia page and everything,” you argue against his complete silence. “I believe in it.”
“That means nothing.”
“Rude.” You glare pointedly. “Anyway, point is, we’re going out tonight to the cemetery and we’re gonna catch this thing on tape.”
Bucky tracks your gaze to finally look down at what you’ve shoved into his hands. It’s a headband, with two cameras attached to it, one facing your face and the other outward. Night vision, he guesses. 
He sighs. “How long? An hour?” 
“Was Hamlet written in an hour? Was Sharknado filmed in an hour?” you exclaim. “Great art takes time. We’re staying out there as long as we need to. So help me, we will emerge victorious.”
Bucky stares at you. “Two hours.”
“Seven.”
“Thirty minutes.”
“Your will is weak and your spirit is cowardly.” You return his fixed look with equal intensity, if not more, which he didn't think was possible. “Three hours.”
“Deal.”
“Great.” You stick your hand out, and he grabs on firmly. “See you at 1am.”
“1am?!”
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It is 1am, it is cold and Bucky is miserable. 
But he’s there. In the cemetery. With the stupid camera rig on his head. 
You offer him whiskey to warm him up, and he agrees. 
You then tell him you don’t actually have any because you didn’t think he’d accept.
He hates it here.
The wind whistles around the both of you. The eerie silence is only compounded by the fact that he can’t see anything beyond a certain point. The night is especially dark and there is no moonlight.
He trudges through the patchy grass, dry leaves crunching under his boots.
The camera being so close to his face along with the fact that you wouldn’t stop singing the same three fucking lines of the song over and over again, makes him want to tear his hair out.
“That thing’s not gonna get near us if you don’t shut up,” he grumbles.
“Nonsense,” you hum. “I’m a goddamn delight. He’s gonna be trippin’ over himself to get to me.”
“He doesn’t exist.”
“He definitely does, and you know what? I bet your shit vibes are gonna attract him. Moth to flame and all that. Karmic justice.” 
Bucky stares straight ahead, swerving to avoid running into cracked tombstones. 
You go back to singing, but worse this time. 
“What if we don’t get anything?” he interrupts, to protect his sanity. “No one wants to watch a bunch of people just walk around the dark for 20 minutes.”
There’s no response. 
It takes a second for Bucky to realise the singing’s stopped too.
He stops in his tracks, head swivelling to look for you.
“The fuck…” he mutters. 
In the cemetery, he is truly alone for a moment. Silent, other than wrought iron gates creaking in the far distance. 
The leaves of the tree above him rustle.
Bucky looks up, squinting against the darkness. 
Against the stillness of the night, he sees it. A figure stands tall on the branches of the tree, silhouette obscured by the leaves. 
It leers down at him, unmoving.
Bucky doesn’t even flinch.
“Very funny,” he says. “Hilarious.”
“We’ll fake it,” the figure calls from above. “If we don’t get any footage, I’ll just get on up there and fuck around and you record.”
“Get down,” he demands. “We’re not faking footage.”
If this show had to die this way, so be it.
“Bore,” you boo, lowering yourself to the ground with ease. “If I didn't know any better, I’d say you don’t want to be a part of this series.”
“I don’t.”
“Anyway,” you say obnoxiously, “we won’t have to. There is definitely a cryptid here. I can feel it in my bones.”
“We’re halfway through the graveyard and there’s nothing here,” he shoots back. “We should call it quits.”
“You’re right,” you say, to his surprise. “We need to cover more ground. Let’s split up.”
That is most definitely not what he was saying.
But you start singing again and so Bucky agrees faster than you finish the same stupid third line for the hundredth time that hour.
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Bucky is a man of dignity.
Less than five minutes later, he gives up.
He takes a seat against the trunk of a tall tree, in a relatively open clearing. 
He figures if he just takes a nap then the two hours would pass by quicker. 
Bucky has no idea where you’ve gone. The lack of light doesn’t help, even with his advanced vision. 
He crosses his arms behind his head and settles back, eyes closing. 
Not even a second later, he wants to rip his hair out when the stupid song you were singing reintroduces itself in his head.
“For fuck’s sake,” he groans. 
The tree he’s leaning against shifts ever so slightly.
His eyes fly open, but he doesn’t move an inch.
Instinctually, his breathing slows and his ears tune in to pick up even the faintest sounds.
The draft whispers, and he knows for a fact that something is above him.
A branch cracks. 
“Go away,” Bucky says loudly. 
A second passes. 
And then another. 
“You’re supposed to be looking for the thing,” you shout.
“It’ll find me if it wants to.” He shifts to make himself more comfortable. “I’m givin’ him a real shot here.” 
“You didn’t even look up.”
“Didn’t have to.”
“He could have been above you.”
“But he wasn’t.” Bucky’s eyes close again. 
“You’re terrible.” It comes back muffled, and branches shift. “I’m headin’ that way. One of us has to put some effort into this.”
“Joy. Knock yourself out.”
The trunk moves under his muscles again and Bucky lets out a small exhale, settling back into the position he was in.
Until he hears you singing in the distance. Same three lines, same off-key tune.
Bucky drags his palm across his face. 
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An hour passes. 
Unlike his original plan, he does not sleep.
He instead recounts every element he remembers from the periodic table. 
Replays every Dodgers game from his childhood, and then gets mad at their shift. 
Then he tries to recollect every fact he knows about you so far. Mutant, captured and experimented on, broke free several years before him. Met Nat along the way and befriended her. Telekinesis, slowed aging. Escape artist. Wedding videographer. Allegedly.
He just doesn’t get how you’re so goddamn chirpy all the time, given that he’d been through something similar and come out the way he had. 
It had taken him a month to say anything to anyone other than Steve. You went out for brunch with Sam the same weekend you showed up at the compound.
He doesn’t get you.
Speaking of which, he hasn’t actually seen you in a while. 
He checks the time on his watch. Nearly 3am.
He had a fucking workout in the morning and no lizard-man was going to be the cause for Steve outrunning him.
He pushes himself off the ground with a groan, and stretches out his sore limbs. Definitely too old for lying around a cemetery beyond midnight.
He calls out your name loudly, and then again, before waiting. 
He hears bells ringing in the distance. 
Bucky looks up.
In the shadows of the trees, he comes face to face with the same sight as before. A figure, standing on the branches.  
“There’s nothing here,” he calls out, sighing. “Can we just leave?”
The twigs creek, and for a second he thinks you’re going to fall. 
“Already told you I’m not faking footage, get down from there,” he repeats. “I’m leaving. I’ll see you at the gate.”
The leaves shuffle around before he hears branches break. 
Something you say gets obscured by your movement, but you disappear again. He thinks that maybe you were cursing him out, and deservedly so. He just couldn’t find it in himself to care. 
He rolls his eyes, but starts making his way to the entrance of the graveyard.
The walk back is faster, and he holds back a yawn as the gates start creeping up on the horizon. 
There’s no sign of you. He half thinks you ditched him here and went back to the compound. Or fell off the tree and were just laying there. 
But he decides to wait, leaning against the exposed concrete wall. 
Eyes closed, he rubs his temples and decides that if you’re not here in the next thirty seconds, he’ll just–
“Hey,” you greeet from right in front of him.
“Where the hell did you go?” he demands. 
You blink at him, before holding up a wrapper. 
“Got a sandwich. I was hungry. The diner was real nice too, I spent like half an hour talkin’ to the owner.”
He stares at you. “You just left to get a sandwich?”
“Yeah, and I got you one, too,” you reply, tossing him a paper bag. “You’re welcome. God bless that man, but those things aren’t cheap.”
“You’ve not been here for the last half hour?”  
“I mean, I spent like ten minutes looking.” You shrug, taking another bite. “All I got was a bunch of grass.”
Ten minutes. Bucky had sat under the stupid tree for an hour. 
“So you just left,” he says dryly.
“Yes,” you reply like it’s not even worth debating. “Besides, if anyone could find a cryptid it’d be you. A fellow cryptid.”
Bucky spins on his heel to leave.
“You’re welcome for dinner,” you call out, and he can hear you laugh.
He flips you the finger, and regrets it a second later when your singing resumes.
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The sandwich is good. He appreciates it.
He even manages to keep pace with Steve the next morning. 
What he doesn’t appreciate is coming back to fifteen missed calls and four video calls from you.
From: co-host (TGS)
can you pick up 
From: co-host (TGS)
i know you have nothing going on in your life you are bitchless
Bucky switches off his phone for the next three hours. 
Finally, it’s a threat that you will show up at his door again and Bucky finally video calls you back that evening. 
“What,” he states.
“Took you long enough,” you huff, sitting up to adjust the camera. In the middle of the ordeal, Bucky sees your laptop open.
“What do you want?” he repeats.
“The team sent over the videos from last night,” you tell him. “At some point in the video you said ‘we’re not faking footage, get down from there.”
“Yeah.”
He hears you play the footage faintly in the background, almost to substantiate your point. He cringes at the sound of his own voice.  
“Who were you talking to?” 
Bucky rolls his eyes. “Heard you in the trees. Figured you climbed up there again.”
“Ah.” You click your tongue. “Interesting.”
“What.”
You hum. “See, that wasn’t me.”
Bucky’s eyes narrow. “Yes, it was.”
“No, it wasn’t,” you say calmly. “I’d left to get dinner way before all that.”
“Right.”
“I’m serious. Got the timestamp on my video to prove it.” You look up at him through the camera finally. “So who were you actually talking to, Barnes?”
Bucky’s nose twitches.
“Bye,” he says shortly.
“Dude,” he hears you laugh loudly through the phone. “I fuckin’ told you you’d attract these things, you–”
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torturedpoetemotions · 9 months
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People miss the point about Dean's interaction with Marta the post office lady in 14x13 so hard and it's FRUSTRATING.
No, it's not a reversal of the running gag about older women finding Sam attractive (which is gross anyway because it usually involves playing his obvious discomfort at being touched without consent for laughs). It is also not just Dean trading on his looks and flirting to get what he wants.
The point is to illustrate a significant difference between the brothers!
Specifically how they interact with the community of Lebanon, and what that says about their characters.
At this point in the show, Sam and Dean have now lived in Lebanon for like, six and a half years. And yet Sam approaches this woman like he would approach any stranger or witness in any random town in the country. And she reacts to him like any witness would to a strange man asking questions--with caution and some level of suspicion. It is incredibly clear that they don't know each other at all, despite how long they've been living in the same community.
But Dean knows her! And not just by sight and in passing. He's on a first name basis with her! He asks about her grandson and she readily answers! She knows his first name, too! They very clearly have an established report and have talked many times, enough times for her to have complained to him about her "spoiled little jerk" of a grandson!
This scene establishes that Dean is a known entity to at least some of the people of Lebanon. A known and LIKED entity. Trusted, even! He has truly put down roots there in a way that Sam has not, despite them living there for the same amount of time. He's bonded with people he sees regularly. He has little interactions with them offscreen all the time. That tells us something about Dean as a character!
And if it's a reversal or play off of anything, it's 1x11 (Scarecrow) when Dean fails to convince a couple who is in danger to let him fix their car so they can leave town sooner. Dean assumes (incorrectly IMO) that it's because HE specifically comes off to "normal people" as abnormal and dangerous, whereas Sam would be able to convince them with just a sincere look. In reality, of course, it probably has more to do with Dean being a total stranger, with no obvious credentials for car-fixing other than his word, in an unfamiliar place, than it does any inherent quality of Dean himself.
Because the key is, Dean isn't putting in any special effort in either scene. The way he approaches the couple is a contrast to how he usually handles cases. There's no costume, no subterfuge, and no alias. He isn't trying to fool either the couple in 1x11 or Marta in 14x13 into liking and trusting him. He's just being himself and telling the truth in both scenes (maybe not ALL the truth, but the essential basics). It works on Marta because she already knows and likes him. It doesn't work on the couple because he's a stranger to them.
So in 14x13 (and at other times in the show too) we see that Sam is not any better with people than Dean, especially when he makes no effort. He in fact gives off somewhat alarming vibes to strangers when he doesn't present with some kind of subterfuge that engenders immediate trust (i.e. being an FBI or insurance agent). (Think of Amelia's initial reaction to him in season 8 for example.) And this is true even for people who have almost certainly seen him around before, in the town he's lived in for over half a decade.
And the fact that he has made no effort to get to know his neighbors is telling in itself. Sam isn't any more automatically trustworthy to regular people than Dean unless he puts in specific effort to be. Costumes and aliases, fake credentials, even that specific face and voice he uses to talk to witnesses are all effort he has to put in. And that effort is not something that comes naturally to him or occurs to him outside of the context of a case. (I think we also see in season 6 exactly how much conscious effort those things require of him, given that without a soul he not only lacks personability but is downright impatient with and insulting to people.)
It's actually Dean who's good at building bonds, establishing casual report, and eliciting trust from people. And moreover, it's Dean who thinks to make the effort to do so. Sam is better at leading hunters specifically, but that's a whole different story and meta.
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fushic0re · 2 years
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─ 𝐖𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒
𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗩𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗚𝗘𝗥𝗦 𝗫 𝗔𝗦𝗜𝗔𝗡!𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗘𝗥
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𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 — in which you and steve have a secret pornhub channel. 
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 — 18+ ONLY; MINORS DNI. pornography. all the smut; unprotected sex, size kink, cum kink, dirty talk, praise kink, little bit of degradation, exhibitionism.
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꒰ ͜͡➸ 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐎𝐘𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘, 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐀 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆! 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐒 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒❜ 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃 & 𝐁𝐔𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑! ♡
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YOU WERE PRACTICALLY BUZZING with excitement and nervousness as you sat patiently on your and Steve’s shared bed. 
Clad in only his crisp button up shirt, you watched him expertly arrange your film setup. The two of you had been planning this for months. It all started off as a fantasy. A kink that the two of you shared but knew you could not act on due to the circumstances of your jobs as Avengers. You had a standard to uphold and enemies lurking in every corner looking for the smallest speck of dirt on you to use as leverage. A sex tape wouldn’t exactly help your cause. 
But one night, you and Steve revisited the topic and came up with a game plan. 
Steve took one of Tony’s cameras. The billionaire techy wouldn’t notice one of his many possessions missing. Plus, its hard drive was impenetrable. There was no possible way anyone was going to get into it besides you two. Steve also managed to get a custom built Stark computer. Tony was thrilled his longtime friend was finally integrating himself into modern technology outside of work. When Steve asked him for brand recommendations, the Stark heir scoffed and without another word, began building the next piece of your plan. Just like everything Stark owned and made, your computer was the best of the best in terms of security. The Avengers’ wi-fi wasn’t exactly hackable either.
Once the logistics were worked out, you and Steve came up with some rules. You were only allowed to film at your residence on the Avengers Compound. This way there would be nothing identifiable in the background that could easily link people to your brownstone in Brooklyn. Obviously, your faces would not be showing. After pulling an all-nighter, the two of you managed to program Tony’s camera so that it automatically cropped your faces out of frame. Lastly – another obvious given – you would only go by aliases. 
Nomad and Lilac.
They were simple and inconspicuous. Lilacs were your favorite flower. After the accords, Steve was a fugitive living the life of a nomad.  
Once the camera was rolling, Steve turned to you with a ravenous expression. 
“You ready, Lilac?” 
You watched yourself getting bent in half and split open by Steve’s cock on the computer screen. The lewd sounds of flesh slapping against flesh and the squelch of your cunt blasted from the speakers. You sat perched on Steve’s lap, the two of you scrolling through the thousands of comments left on the first video posted on your channel. Thousands. 
“Is this what Peter refers to as ‘breaking the internet?” Steve breathed, eyes wide with shock. “About a thousand people in less than 10 hours watched us fuck.” 
“For once in my life, I have absolutely nothing to say.” You stuttered, shaking your head in disbelief. 
The comment section was flooded with praise. 
user1: look at that pretty little cunt
user2: she takes it like a champ
user3: that man is built like a god AND fucks like one too
user4: he’s basically breaking her and half and she’s just like 🥺 that’s love
user5: BRO IS SHE STILL ALIVE AFTER ALL THAT JFC
user6: he has the prettiest dick i’ve ever seen no homo
user7: kinda want them to top me??????
user8: i had to replay this video like 20 times bc i couldn’t decide who to look at that’s bi culture
user9: if my wife cheated on me with him i’d be jealous…of her
user10: this channel is going to be my new addiction i can feel it
It was amusing truly. Everyone was witnessing goody two shoes Steve Rogers, the golden boy, do things to one of the most loved Avengers in the world that would make the devil himself sweat bullets and didn’t even know it. You, always sitting pretty and prim without a single hair out of place, were splayed out and covered in spit and cum. A sight for the world to see, but only for the man you loved to know firsthand. 
Steve’s embrace tightened as the video continued to play. His lips trailed your neck, covering every inch of exposed skin in kisses and love bites. He suckled the spot directly below your ear, prompting your eyes to slowly shut and your body to go lax against his. He slithered one hand up your body, gripping your face firmly and slipping his thumb in between your parted lips. Watching yourselves on screen was doing a number on him. He knew it would, hence why he went through with the channel with you, but actually seeing the fruit of his deepest fantasies was something else entirely.
“You like when strangers watch me fuck you?” Steve purred in your ear. 
You nodded with a low whine, wrapping your hand around his wrist. Just like that, he had your entire body under his spell. Your back arched slightly, your bottom now flush against his groin. A growl so deep you felt the vibrations from his chest against your back rumbled from your lover. 
“I would have never imagined myself doing something like this,” Steve confessed. “You make me fuckin’ crazy, sweetheart.”
No one would know. It was your dirty little secret. 
AS TIME PASSED, you and Steve’s channel unexpectedly blew up. Lilac and The Nomad became an adult channel that seemingly everyone was talking about. Twitter and Reddit pages dedicated to reposting your content were being made left and right. Your messages were blowing – no pun intended – up with requests from viewers, some even asking for private shows in exchange for unreasonable sums of money. Every now and then, a couple of overzealous users would ask for in-person meet ups. Obviously, you and Steve paid the latter no mind. It was the praise and the thrill of sneaking around that the two of you chased after. It became addicting. The two of you simply could not stop.
That’s how you found yourself in your current circumstance.
Since recovering post-blip, Tony had insisted upon family nights at least once a week. Said night consisted of having dinner together and following it up with a movie marathon. They were nights of wholesomeness, which is why the feeling of Steve’s rough hands creeping past the band of your cotton shorts felt deliciously lude. With your back against his chest, his arms wound around your front, a blanket covering the both of you, and the rest of the Avengers’ attention focused on the screen, Steve could do whatever he wanted with you and no one would notice. You gripped his forearm tightly as a thick finger dipped into your wetness before sliding over your clit. He circled it in slowly, agonizingly. Your composure began to crumble crack by crack. Each time Scott turned to everyone to deliver some stupid commentary or Wanda asked for you to pass a snack to her, a piece of your sanity chipped away. By the time your baby hairs were stuck to your forehead with sweat and your limbs felt nonexistent, Steve’s hand retreated.
He brought his plump lips to your ear discreetly.
“Get the camera, go to the guest bathroom, and wait for me.”
Like a woman possessed, you got up without hesitating and began to make your way out of the family living room.
“Where do you think you’re going, Mrs. America? Sit down,” Tony snarked.
“Period. Not feeling good.” You excused, keeping the lie short and simple so no one would ask questions.
Tony’s nose wrinkled slightly before he nodded, dismissing you with a wave of a hand. From behind you, Pepper scolded him.
“You’re going to have to get better at that. You have a daughter.”
He sighed deeply.
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
Once you were out of earshot, you sprinted up to your and Steve’s room to retrieve the goods, then sprinted right back down to the guest bathroom. It didn’t take long for the love of your life to meet you at your rendezvous, his eyes wide and pupils dilated with anticipation. He made quick work of locking the door behind him before scooping you up into his arms and placing you on the granite counter. You giggled quietly as he practically tore off your shorts and panties, pushing his sweatpants down just enough to slide his cock out before taking the camera from you.
“They’re gonna love this,” Steve murmured, turning the device on and hitting record.
He angled the lens towards the treasure that laid in between your legs, gripping his member with one hand and slapping your cunt with it. Its sheer weight against your already stimulated pearl made you yelp. Steve shushed you quicky, letting go of his cock and letting his hips do the work. He continued to glide in between your wet folds, his now free hand sliding up your torso to push the hem of your oversized sweatshirt up. Once your bare breast were revealed to him, it didn’t take long until he was greedily massaging them in large palm. He allowed the camera to linger for a moment before returning it to its initial angle.
“Look at that,” He remarked lowly. “Already soaked me and I haven’t even been inside of you yet.”
Sure enough, his cock was glistening with your nectar. Your mouth watered, excited to see just how gorgeous it looked on camera.
“Think you can be quiet for me, pretty girl?”
You nodded eagerly, wiggling your hips needily. Steve let you play, chuckling darkly when his head caught your entrance, and he began to push into you. All of the oxygen was knocked out of you. No matter how many times you and Steve had sex, nothing could get you used to the first intrusion of his incredibly thick cock. Your inner thighs trembled as he bottomed inside of you, teeth sinking into your pillowy bottom lip as you suppressed a sharp gasp. Slowly, he withdrew his hips before roughly slamming back into you with a long, wanton moan.
“Fuck. You’re such a good girl letting me have you like this,” Steve praised, low grunts and growls reverberating from him as he increased his pace.
Everything was too much – from the pleasure your man was making you feel, the sounds he was making, how gorgeous he looked in the throes of passion, and the need to keep quiet. You felt like a ticking timebomb that could explode at any second.
And yet, things had just gotten started.
The two of you fucked like depraved animals, pouring every ounce of energy into your mutual pleasure. You wanted to badly to reach up and press your lips against his, but for the life of you could not get your brain to work, for your body was a slave for lust. Steve, however, could sense just what you needed. He placed the camera down, making sure it had a perfect shot of you both, before gathering you in his arms. He pressed his forehead against yours before devouring you’re his with his. He continued to fuck you without faltering, swallowing your whimpers and moans like a man starved.
“I fucking love you,” He huffed quietly just for you to hear, punctuating his words with vigorous thrusts. “I. Love. You. So. Much.”
“I love you,” You hummed, too cock drunk and fucked out. “’M gonna cum…so fucking hard.”
“Do it. While everyone out there worries about you because they think you don’t feel good when in reality, you’re too much of a cock slut and just couldn’t wait to get fucked. Do it.” Steve commanded, his own words shaky as he neared his release.
That was enough to push you over the edge. Unable to stop yourselves, you came with a vociferous sob, the tightening of your channel around his cock sending Steve over with an equally enthusiastic exultation. Rope after rope of cum coated your walls until eventually, it began to ooze out of you before Steve could even pull out. When he did, he had to hold himself back from ravishing you once more. The sight of your pussy, swollen from use, painted in his copious seed was one for sore eyes. He sure to get a generous amount of footage of the money shot, already anticipating the audience’s reactions before switching the camera off. You both recovered slumped in each other’s arms, the hulking blond’s face nuzzled sweetly against your bosom until you both deemed it appropriate to leave.
“I can’t go back out there.” You groaned, your head filling with every embarrassing scenario possible.
Steve chortled endearingly, carefully pulling your panties back up and the hem of your sweatshirt back down and over your bum. Putting your shorts back on was not even in question, you were far too sensitive for that.
“I got you, sugar,” He cooed, wrapping one arm under your bottom and scooping you into his embrace once more. You wrapped your arms and legs around him, dozing off as he walked the two of you to your room.
“Go ahead and upload. I’ll tell them that you don’t feel good and needed a nap, then I’ll be right up.” Steve promised as he gently laid you down on your shared bed.
You made yourself comfortable before reaching for Steve’s computer and doing your thing. You were unable to cease your lips from turning up into a devious smile as your nimble fingers danced across the keyboard.
“got fucked in the bathroom in the middle of family movie night”
After double checking everything, you hit upload and watched the views rise. The sensation Steve’s spent leaking out of your used hole as you read the comments your new home movie was already accruing caused heat to rise to your face. It was still a shock that you and America’s gold boy were living a double life as amateur pornstars.
user1: I thought the load nomad had in their first video was just a one off. Clearly this dude can nut like a fucking champ.
user2: this is so fucking hot especially when they were whispering to each other
user3: KJDHS that’s SO much cum???is that a condition or something???
user4: okay but that’s a nice ass bathroom are they making money off of these videos?
user5: idk if i wanna be nomad or lilac 😵‍💫
user6: i’m this 👌🏼 close to dedicating a fanpage to them
user7: not to be deep on fucking PORNHUB of all places but this is some real shit. you can feel the passion, love, and care they have for each other. this is the type of porn we should all be watching, none of that overproduced fake shit.
user7: this mf is built like captain america what the fuck do you eat nomad
The last comment made you laugh heartily, but also arose some concern. Was someone catching on? Worry filled the absence of lust. All it would take for the entirety of your lives to fall apart was for one person to put the pieces together. As much as you and Steve loved the rush, both of you were playing a dangerous game with your respective livelihoods.
But then you remembered Steve.
Steve and all he had sacrificed for the betterment of the world. Steve, the man who hadn’t even lived his life for himself and never once complained about it. Steve, who was finally being selfish and acting on his own desires rather than everyone else’s. Lilac and The Nomad was more than just an adult content channel. It was a symbol of the love of your life’s emancipation from social standards. The first step of him doing whatever the fuck he wanted, not what everyone else wanted. He deserved it. The two of you had taken every precaution to protect yourselves. No one would know. It was just a stupid joke.
“CHEERS!” EVERYONE CHIMED AS they clinked their glasses together.
“Congratulations, Cap!”
Sam beamed widely upon being called his new moniker for the first time. He placed an amicable arm around his predecessor.
“Thanks guys, and thank you for this opportunity, man.” He lauded.
“Literally, out with the old and in with the new.” Natasha sniggered, earning an eye roll from Steve.
“I can still fire you, Romanoff,” He countered.
The ember haired woman simply flipped him off before taking another swig of Russian vodka.
“On a real note, what are you going to do now?” Bruce inquired.
Steve shrugged, placing his beer bottle down casually.
“I don’t know. The only thing I could really think of was getting a place in Brooklyn, which we just did. I don’t have a plan for my next move and for once it feels…good.”
“Well,” Thor grunted. “You can start by finally getting drunk off of Asgardian liquor.”
Thor reached for a decanter behind him and the former captain a generous glass of the amber liquid.
“There you go! That’s my man! Drink up, spangles!” Tony encouraged.
“I’m not getting drunk,” Steve argued, causing everyone to boo loudly. “But…I’ll have this.”
He turned to you, his glass raised in his hand. His azure orbs were capacious, glimmering with hope. He wore a refreshed expression that you had never seen on him before as he smiled dazzlingly at you. It melted your heart to finally see him like this.
“To our new beginning.”
“Cheers.”
Everyone around you gagged playfully. You hushed them with a threatening hiss.
“I have so much dirt on you guys, I wouldn’t make a single sound if I were you.”
“…. Did that do something to you too?” Bucky teased.
“Hey, shut your fuckin’ mouth, punk!”
“OH! He curses now!”
The night persisted wonderfully. Sam was celebrated in the way he deserved to be. Sure, there was still a lot of work left to do in the world, but all of you were on a new life journey. And sure, new territory was scary, but it was also invigorating. To be able to rejoice together with the people you loved most was even more invigorating.
“Women do not watch porn!” Clint yelled. “That sounds fake!”
“Women probably watch more porn than men,” Natasha argued. “Better porn too. Not whatever you call those 5 minutes of pump and grunt.”
    “I only watch women’s porn.” Laura added, her husband’s expression twisting into one of perplexion.
“You only what?”
“Speaking of porn,” Wanda giggled tipsily. “There’s this new couple that I’ve been watching and they’re—” She ended her sentence with the chef’s kiss gesture.
“Who?! I love that homemade shit!” Sam yelled from across the table.
“Their names are Nomad and Lilac on Pornhub,”
You and Steve tensed up, not moving a single centimeter for fear oF triggering something. What exactly was unknown. He gripped your hand reassuringly.
No one would find out.
“I wanna see.” Bucky chimed in, brows furrowed with curiosity.
Sam tittered mischievously, hopping to the living room to retrieve the television remote. You turned to your partner with a fearful expression. Steve shook his head discreetly, leaning in to peck your cheek soothingly.
“And that’s our que to call it a night.” He quickly stated, saving face successfully.
“He loves her so much he doesn’t even want to see another woman get railed.” Wanda cried to herself drunkenly. “That’s so sweet,”
“Good night, everyone,” You bid, swallowing the frog in your throat.
“Good night, you two. You know where your room is right?” Pepper questioned politely.
“We’re all good, Pep. Thank you for having us,” Steve thanked, wishing everyone one final farewell before rushing the both of you to one of the Stark guest rooms.
“Steven! They’re fucking watching us!” You panicked quietly.
“I believe the correct way to say that is ‘they’re watching us fuck’—”
“…Are you actually joking with me right now?”
“Sweetheart,” Steve uttered softly, cupping your face in his hands. “It’s okay. I promise. Thousands of people have watched us. This is no different. You and I did a pretty damn good job at covering our bases. If the world hasn’t figured it out, the people closest to us definitely won’t.”
Silence filled the room as you retired to the confines of your intrusive thoughts.
 “We can stop if you’re worried. We’ll take everything down, crush up the camera and computer into pieces, toss them into a landmine, and act like nothing ever happened. I want you comfortable, honey.” Steve promised.
You shook your head.
“No, no. I’m sorry. I just got a little shocked. That’s all.” You rushed out.
“Don’t apologize. I got a little scared too. I mean, my heart dropped to my goddamn stomach. I haven’t felt that since Coney Island.”
His belly filled with butterflies when you laughed, all of your worries dissipating into thin air.
“But you know what else I felt?” He proposed, his soft tone taking on a huskier one.
You hummed in response, your heart skipping a beat at the shift in energy.
“Desire. Lust.” He pulled you towards him until your body was pressed against his, your lips barely brushing his. “I want to see their expressions while they watch us.”
It was like you were never worried in the first place when your back hit the mattress and Steve’s body covered yours.
“Let’s calm you down, pretty girl.”
From the living room, the Avengers played each Lilac and The Nomad video one after another. Wanda simply fangirled, loving that her suggestion was actually being enjoyed thoroughly by everyone. The video of you and Steve having a quickie in the bathroom was the best to play. It had become one of your most viewed videos, the reach far greater than you would have imagined.            
“This one’s my favorite personally.” Laura critiqued casually as the video reached its halfway mark.
“In the middle of a family movie night, huh? Which one of you nasty shitheads has pulled one of those?” Sam accused, pointing a finger at each person.
“We would all know if someone did.”
“True. It would be obvious. Did anyone even leave last movie night?”
“Steve and Y/N did.”
No one spoke. Everyone went silent before glancing around at each other and then back up at the television screen.
“B-but, he said she was having…lady problems.” Scott stuttered, his expression growing more and more mortified as he began to connect the dots.
“That sweater does look familiar.” Bucky pointed out, gesturing to the display on the screen with a jerk of his head.
“I, uh, bought one just like that for her,” Natasha spoke under her breath. “It was a souvenir.”
“Steve Rogers wouldn’t do that stuff, guys! C’mon! That’s Captain America!” Scott blurted out in pure denial.
“Not anymore.” Tony rebutted. “That is a free man who can do whatever he pleases. As you can see—” He pointed to the TV animatedly.
“That’s definitely them. A couple months ago he asked me for computer recommendations, and I ended up building one for him. When has that man ever cared about computers?”
“Check the date of the video in the description.”
Unable to handle the anticipation, Bucky snatched the remote from a shocked Scott’s hand and scrolled down to the description. He scoffed with a smile of disbelief.
“Well, I’ll be damned. I didn’t think the little shit had it in him.”
“These are just coincidences, you guys! We have no confirmation whatsoever that it’s the—”
Something akin to a cry mixed with a moan from a couple doors away cut their words short. One that sounded exactly like the ones coming from the TV. Your teammates had all of the confirmation they need.
“Sooooo….how do we look them in the eye now?”
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charliemwrites · 3 months
Text
Character File
Name: Castle “Daddy” Alistair Aliases: Daddy, Captain Daddy, Big Daddy Age: 38 Gender and pronouns: AMAB using he/him/his Marital Status: officially unmarried; unofficially – very taken Surviving family: mother, father, sister
Physical description: Standing at 6’3” (190.5 cm) and weighing 225 lbs. (102 kilos) Captain Alistair is all around built strong and thick. Broad shoulders, slight tapering at the waist, and thick thighs. His hair is dark brown, shaved close at the sides and longer at the top – if he allowed it to grow out it would curl. His eyes are a very deep brown with a strong, square jaw and aquiline nose. Teeth are straight and even, though he has prominent canines. (face claim: John Bernthal)
Identifying/Unusual features:
Two facial scars; one across the bridge of his nose and one high on his left cheek. Both required stitches, though they were acquired separately.
Tattoos: The SpecGru symbol on the left side of his chest An ouroboros snake around his left thigh A rook with daisies on his right bicep (for his little sister) A full back pieces of the Grim Reaper with ravens
Two crooked fingers from a break that didn’t set correctly
While he has several scars, the worst of them is crisscrossing circles around his left calf; a steel cord wrapped around it multiple times and almost took the entire leg
Early Childhood:
Castle was born to Clancy and Helena Alastair in Michigan. Clancy had always wanted a boy, so after a difficult delivery, he and Helena were happy to stop at one and focus all their attention on their son. The first twelve years of his life were spent in a quiet suburb that was developed in the 50s.
Clancy owned fifty percent of a construction company that he built from the ground up with a childhood friend. When Castle was old enough, his father began to bring him to construction sites, teaching him the basics of both business and carpentry. Castle grew up with a strong appreciation for hard work and building things from the ground up, instilled by his father. He greatly admired Clancy’s dedication and hands-on approach as a leader.
Castle also had a deep love and respect for his mother, a music teacher at the local high school. She was both charismatic and eccentric, with a love of silly dresses and jewelry. She embodied kindness and compassion without compromising her own self-respect, the people she loved were her whole world. Family was everything to her and Castle feels that she taught him what love truly is.
In middle school, Castle developed something of a temper. Love, he thought, meant protecting his family. Insults or jokes about either of his parents were met with swift and violent responses. He spent many afternoons in the principal’s office (and many nights without dessert) from brawls in the lunchroom or curses traded across classrooms.
In the spring of sixth grade, Clancy got into an accident that left him with permanent damage to his knee and lower back. He chose to sell his half of the company to his business partner, then bought a small farm that he moved his family to that summer. While Castle initially was angry about the move, and angry that he had no say in the matter, he found that he really enjoyed the wide-open spaces and all the animals they now had to tend to.
Seventh grade brought better friends and a better attitude. Working on the farm gave him a physical outlet for all his growing hormones.
That winter brought a little sister.
Clancy’s younger brother (the well-earned black sheep of the family) had had an affair. When his affair partner died of birth-related illness, he was left with an illegitimate child. Neither his affair partner’s family nor his own wife wanted anything to do with the baby. So he brought her to his eldest brother, Clancy.
Even past their prime and with no particular desire for another child, Clancy and Helena took the baby girl in without hesitation. (Though Clancy did kick his younger brother’s ass quite soundly while Castle sneakily watched from the window.) She didn’t even have a name yet. Helena jokingly suggested naming her “Rook” to go with “Castle,” but then their son latched onto the name, and it stuck.
Rook became Castle’s whole world as he helped his parents care for both a baby and their new farm. He often sat with her when he came home from school – kept an eye on her while he did homework, giving his parents a break to take care of things they hadn’t been able to with the baby. While they weren’t technically siblings, they were blood, and Clancy insisted that the age gap between them meant that Castle needed to act responsibly with her. That she would look up to him since he was so much older already.
In high school, he would often walk (or carry) Rook to and from preschool on his way to his own classes. Clancy wanted him to join the football team, and while Castle enjoyed it to an extent, he preferred to be helping at home.
It was in his junior year that he began to seriously consider joining the military. By senior year, he had decided. When he graduated, he went into an ROTC program at the state college an hour away. Once he graduated, he joined the marine corps.
Military Career:
Alistair rose quickly in reputation and rank during his time in the marine corps. A level-headed and disciplined man, he became known for his leadership prowess early on. While not outgoing, he was well-regarded by his comrades and often a morale-booster, excelling in any unit he was placed in. He excelled in stealth and infiltration but had an impressive record as a sniper as well.
Unfortunately, his career was cut short when information leaked on a high-risk mission. The mission was a failure, with two teammates sacrificing themselves for the sake of the unit. At the safehouse, the remains of the team were ambushed just as exfiltration arrived via helicopter.
While trying to help a comrade up, a steel cord tangled around his leg and nearly dragged him from the aircraft. In the pain and panic, he dropped his teammate to his death. Alistair would have lost his leg if not for the quick response of his sole surviving team member.
Alistair would later discover that very teammate was the one to betray the unit. The man mysteriously disappeared, and Alistair was honorably discharged from service.
A year later, he was recruited for the PMC known as SpecGru.
SpecGru:
Keegan Russ is credited with coining Alistair’s callsign, “Daddy,” though his fellow teammate Nila “Nova” Brown quickly adopted it as well. They claim this is due to Alistair’s close observation, concern for health, and deep protectiveness for his squad. His adaptive and lenient leadership style has endeared him to even the most standoffish of his team – Nikto.
The addition of the fifth and final member to his unit has skyrocketed them to one of the highest success rates in SpecGru.
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