#he can stab peoples eyeballs while they sleep!

[cameronspecial]

I saw you were looking for some angst ideas lmao

So rafe and reader are together. Loves her more than life but his addiction gets in the way of that. One night they have a fuming argument and she doesn’t talk to him for a few days. He then makes a plan for them to talk about it somewhere private at nighttime, but when she shows up he’s not there. She waits for him for a while then she gets attacked by the rafes dealers because he owes them money and she was the next bet. Rafe finds her and he’s freaking out but she won’t let him near her and she blames him. You can choose how this ending goes or if you even want to write this but this has been on my mind

You Deserve Better

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings: Drug Use, Swearing, Stabbing, Blood, and Death

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 2.1K

Masterlist

The centre of Rafe’s life wasn’t always the white powder that tumbled around the little Ziploc bag that lined his pockets. His centre is supposed to snort or wheeze a little whenever she laughs, refusing to use her inhaler because she doesn’t want to embarrass him. It will stay up past her bedtime because she is in a flow with her work. His sun crosses her eyeballs whenever he presses a kiss on her nose because she knows it would make him chuckle. Y/N Y/L/N used to be his rock and now, all because of an accident, she isn’t anymore. That is something not a lot of people know. They assume his addiction started because he was a bored rich kid who had the money to spare. However, in reality, it began with a torn ACL. One wrong shift of his leg and his football career was over. At first, the oxycodone was only to manage the pain from the ACL surgery. He had the hope that he could recover the way he needed to get back on the field, but then the news came that he wasn’t progressing the way his doctor wanted… That was when the problem started, suddenly the drug he was taking to help ease his physical pain became the one to take away his mental pain too. The pain of not being able to play football. The pain of missing out. The pain of not knowing where his life was going.

Don’t get him wrong, Y/N was by his side the whole time, except a person can’t be everything to someone else and he needed a therapist. He just wasn’t ready to admit that. It was only when he stopped being prescribed oxycodone that he turned to cocaine to fill the mental hole the prescription used to be for.

———

Rafe’s blown pupils are hidden by his eyelids as he lies back on the couch. Y/N is still out with her friends, so he isn’t sleeping. Not when she is not at home. The front door opening and closing makes him jerk forward. His eyelids are just a sliver because the light from the ceiling is too bright for him. Her footsteps approach the living room and the large sigh she lets out makes her arrival known. “You didn’t do the dishes,” she states, her hand resting on her jut-out hip. “And the hole in the hallway is still there.” Yesterday, Rafe, in a high state, accidentally made a hole in the wall when trying to put up a picture frame for her. He promised her before she left for work this morning that he would get what he needed to fix it this morning and in the afternoon, he would fix it. However, before he could get himself to the store, he saw a post from one of his old football teammates, who went pro and he spiralled. 

He doesn’t mean to roll his eyes, yet it happens and this causes her to let out another huff. “I didn’t get a chance to go to the store,” he grumbles like he didn’t care. He really did though. He wanted to be able to do something that simple for the girl who meant everything to him, except his mind seemed to disagree with his heart. It is easier to pretend it doesn’t bother him. Her eyes narrow in on the residue of powder on their coffee table, “Let me guess, you got your nose caught up in some business. Rafe, you promised me you wouldn’t do that shit at home.” He can’t keep looking at the way tears start to appear because he knows how worried she gets when he does drugs, always scared he might overdose. He looks anywhere but at her. “Don’t get on my ass about this again Y/N. You don’t know what I am dealing with,” he argues.

“I don’t and that’s the problem. You need to talk to someone about how you are feeling because you are going to put yourself in an early grave if you keep doing what you are doing now.”

“Seriously, we are going to argue about this again because I didn’t do the dishes or fix a little hole in the wall.”

“No, we are going to argue about it because you aren’t the man I fell in love with anymore and I don’t think if I can do this anymore. I want to be by your side to help you get better but if you don’t want to, then I don’t know if I can be here forever.”

Her words hit his ears at the same intensity as they would if he were sitting next to an airplane engine. They had arguments about his sobriety so many times before, yet those fights always had the underlying understanding that she would be there to help him. She never once mentioned the possibility of her leaving him because she truly did want to help him find his sobriety. His mouth falls open to talk. No words come out. How can he possibly swear that he wants to get better when he isn’t at the self-realization point in his journey? She takes the silence as an admittance that getting clean isn’t on his mind. “I need some time apart. I’m going to sleep at Deliah’s place tonight,” she informs, turning to leave. He doesn’t stop her; he wants to give her the space she needs in hopes that she realizes she can hold on for a little bit longer. The only word he can respond with is “Okay”, right before she closes the door behind her. 

———

She hasn’t answered any of his texts and calls. Her night of taking some space turned into a week and it is driving him crazy. Her non-existence return may have to do with his unwillingness to agree to go to a therapist. After the thousandth attempt at calling her, she finally answers the call. “Normally, when a person doesn’t pick up the call, it means they don’t want to talk to you.” He lets out an internal sigh, “I know, I just need to talk to you. Please, can we meet at our spot, Sunshine?” She could never resist the usage of his nickname for her. “Okay, meet me there in an hour,” she agrees. The call drops right after her response and he gives himself a small smile. Not only does he get to see her again, he gets to try to get her back. 

———

By the time she realizes she is being followed, she is alone under the bleachers, where she and Rafe used to spend their time in high school. It was where they found themselves when they didn’t feel like going to class or they needed to get away from the chaos after his team won a game. It was the place she fell in love with him in because even before they were dating when they were just friends, it was their spot. She spins around at the sound of grass being pressed down by a set of feet, ready to scold him for being late. It isn’t Rafe as she expected; instead, an average-height man with a dangerous air that scares her. The gleam behind his eyes tells her the bald man is up to no good, which is confirmed when he pulls out the hunting knife from his hoodie pocket. She steps back in an attempt to get away from him, but her back hits against a metal beam. The man rushes toward her and presses the sharp edge against the soft skin of her neck. “Your boy owes me money and since he is taking too long to get it back to me, I thought I would hold onto something precious to him until I get what I want,” the man explains with a wicked grin. She refuses to show him fear and looks him dead in the eyes, “Rafe’s dealer is Barry so I have no idea what you are talking about.” “He stopped going to Barry because Barry started getting on his case about how much he is using,” the male growled, not enjoying the bite to her bark. She chuckles like a maniac, “When Rafe comes, he is going to beat your ass.” “Shut up, Bitch.” Angered by his words, her knees find their target between his legs. 

He lets out a howl and doubles over in pain. She uses this as her opportunity to attempt an escape, trying to run past him. Unfortunately, he reaches out to stop her and this results in the blade driving into her abdomen. A gasp passes her lips, causing the dealer to look in her direction. “Shit.” His eyes bloom open and immediately begins to pull it out. “No. Don’t pu-,” she warns, except it is too late. The weapon is already out and he is running toward the exit. She hunches forward and stumbles back against the beam, pressing her hand to her stomach to keep from bleeding out, feeling as though she has been punched. Calling 911 seems to be the logical answer; however, when she goes for her phone, she finds it broken on the floor. She thinks about going to her car and is stopped by the feeling of even more blood gushing out of the wound as she tries to push off the beam. It doesn’t hurt as much as she thought it would. 

“Sunshine,” rings through her ears. Her dizziness makes it difficult to focus on the speaker, yet she knows who it is based on the nickname. She slides down the beam because her legs lose all their strength. Rafe rushes to her side and kneels beside her. “Shit, Sunshine. It’s going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay. I’m going to call the police. They are going to fix everything,” his voice breaks as his hand joins hers to stop the flow of his blood. She can hear him relaying the information to the dispatcher, but her body is telling her something Rafe isn’t going to be ready to hear. He places his phone on the floor so both of his hands can press on her abdomen. “They’re coming, Sunshine, just hold on. I promise. I’ll be here the whole time.” Her handshakes as she raises to his cheek, staining it with her blood. Her tears water at the edge of her bottom eyelid, “I don’t think I’m going to make it.” His head shakes vigorously. “Don’t say tha-.” She cuts him off, “Can you please just listen to me?” He nods to let her continue. “It was your dealer. I’m not telling you this to make you feel bad. Just to make sure he gets arrested. But I need you to know that you are more than just your addiction and football. I know you don’t think so, but you are and if you just realize that, then you will see the man that I fell in love with.” “I don’t deserve that though. Look at all the shit I put you through. You deserve more than a druggie as a boyfriend,” he cries, holding her hand against his skin.

She smiles up at him, “You deserve more too. You deserve to be truly happy. You deserve to try to find a new purpose in life. I want that for you.” “How can I find all of that if you are gone?” he questions. Her breathing begins to become laboured, “You’ll find yourself and once you grieve, you’ll find someone who can help heal your broken heart. That’s how.”

“I don’t want anyone else. I just want you. Please, don’t go. Will you please stay if I promise to get sober?” 

“I will be with you every step of the way.”

The words tear his heart in two. He knows what it means. She truly doesn’t think she is coming out of this alive. “I want you to see me get better though. Please. Just hang on a little longer.” His tears cloud his vision. When he doesn’t hear a response, he wipes his eyes to get a closer look at her. The world goes dark at the sight of her glassy eyes only reflecting back his face with no recognition or life behind them. The rise and fall of her chest have stopped. The universe decides to answer his calls for help at a cruel moment as he hears the siren finally approach. There is no use in their hurry if the person who needs saving is the one to do it because Rafe isn’t going to let her last words die with her. He is going to get better, not only for her but for him too. He deserves more than a life of chasing his pain away with drugs and he is determined to achieve that.

Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming @magicalyoura

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #outer banks #rafe cameron imagine #outer banks fanfiction #outer banks imagine #outer banks x reader #rafe #rafe outer banks #rafe x reader #rafe obx #rafe imagine #rafe x you #rafe cameron outer banks #outerbanks #obx #obx fic #obx fanfic #obx imagine

[unsanctitude]

ffgjrb bdfb i cant get out of my head the hought of minish vaati trying to kill a human before he was a big sorcerer or anything. just to see if he could and because he is extremely fucked up

#like he would try. there is no doubt in my mind #honestly?? hed be an extremely effective killer as a mouse considering he's invisible to most people #he can just start poisoning their food!! #he can stab peoples eyeballs while they sleep! #and so much more! #like i guess if anything the town minish would stop him. not until he's a few victims in though #vaati is like oh you guys thrive off of making humans happy? well i thrive off of torturing them but ok #if he isnt this demented he at least would go out of his way to inconvenience humans #just to spite the other minish. because he is not like the other minisb he HATES humans /_- #vaati #tmc #the minish cap #loz

[bigtittydemonwife]

The pasta’s love language Part 1

Jeff The Killer 

Protectiveness

 this is the most obviously way the bastard man lets you know he cares about you 

Behind the asshole tsundere attitude and I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude about life lays another smaller asshole and buried deep under that lays the small boy that picked a fight with three bullies to protect his loving brother

Weather it’s him decking o**enderman for being creepy or saving you from a tricky last victim it seems Jeff always knows when your in trouble 

So low-key about it you never really notice his eyes on you until you’re being helped, and even then you never notice how they never leave

Jeff is like a dog, but not the loving wagging tail dog, the asshole that stands on your feet with his sharp claws, rips open your pillows and terrorises the mailman so much your mail is delivered by drone.

but he is also the dog that late at night sneaks onto your bed and whenever there’s someone strange approaching you on the street at night stands in front of you and bares his teeth 

Physical Touch 

Jeff’s love isn’t soft

Jeff’s love is as rough as he is 

Jeff’s touch is soft head-pats after you put someone in their place 

His touch is high fives after a successful mission where your hands linger together

His touch is quick side hugs before he goes off to go do something stupid 

Cheeky neck kisses in front of others to make you flustered 

fingers running though your hair or down your sides whenever he gets bored 

easiest way to get cuddled by this man? after a mission when he’s too tired to act like a tsundere  

Jeff is funnily like a cat in this regards, his cuddles are fun but he has to want to, otherwise it’s deemed as unnecessary

Defensiveness

Jeff isn’t a rational man 

So when he gets jealous his first response is to just stab the guy and run 

Ass a traumatised stubborn teen Jeff is quick to anger but he toe’s the line (aha reference) at when people disrespect you 

Is he an asshole to you all the time?

Yes

Is he the only person who can be mean to you?

Yes

Despite what everyone thinks Jeff does understand the difference between mean teasing and just being an asshole 

And if your someone like me who shows your love to people you care about by teasing and being mean to him he’s gonna understand if your friends are the same way 

What he does not accept is anyone who dares treat you like your lower than them 

thats when he pulls out his knife and commits stabby stabby 

Ticci Toby 

Physical Touch 

Unlike Jeff when Toby is in love he’s a touchy feely person

And once again unlike Jeff when it comes to cuddles Toby is most likely to be the one to initiate cuddles 

On a good day Toby recharges with touch

Most of the time he’s all over you 

His favourite way to cuddle is him on the bottom with you on his chest and your face buried into his neck 

If you cuddle with him like that theres a 97% chance you are not leaving any time soon 

He loves to hold your hands alot, Toby hands are an eternal mystery as sometimes their cold as fuck and others their super warm

After a really bad day when he’s had his alone time and recharged (which can take as long as a week) he just wants to lay with you a bit 

this usually happens when he’s burnt out (missions do not help) 

on days like that he wants to be held in your arms and rest his head on your chest

that way as he falls asleep he can hear your heartbeat and know your safe and alive 

Compliments 

Toby is an asshole, but he’s a lovable asshole 

And on a good day when he’s happy and in love he’s acting like a lovestuck school boy 

He’s the type to give you either the cutest nicknames or the weirdest 

One day he’ll call you love the next Mustard 

 His compliments are the sweetest thing ever because of how special they are 

instead of complimenting something basic about you (well not basic but well seen by everyone) he compliments you on some of the most obscure things that you didn’t think anyone noticed about you 

“I love how fast you talk when you get excited”

“I love easily you get along with sally”

“Your eyes glow in the sunset, it’s really pretty”

Ben Drowned 

Space

Ben is an antisocial person. 

He’s not bitter about it but most of the time he prefers to keep to himself 

Ben understands if his partner isn’t like that, but one of his ways of showing love is giving them space to be their own person 

While Ben does love to spend time with you and share interests and hobbies 

He is a human demon? ghost? thing that loves alone time 

And by giving you space and your own time alone it’s his way of letting you still have freedom to be you

Ben recharges his social battery with a quiet atmosphere so alone time or cuddle time is his favourite thing to do with you when he’s down

Don’t get me wrong he loves cuddles 

But that doesn’t mean he’s going to be clinging to you 24/7

Acts of service

Ben is a patient person 

Despite what people think all his years of gaming have taught him a lot about taking his time and how easier it is to get things done when he’s chill 

So he’s quite alright with doing things for people when they need help 

But even so he’s still his own person 

So he doesn’t usually do it for free unless it’s for someone he really cares about 

And that’s when you come in 

Ben is basically ready to do anything for you 

Will Jeff call him a simp? Yes, will he care? No 

In the end of the day he’s getting ass and Jeff’s not

Anyway 

You could ask him to hack the government for you and he would 

But basic shit is him bringing you snacks he stole from Jeff’s room when your hungry 

He just likes making you happy 

Physical Touch

Ironically enough in complete contradiction of the first one Ben actually loves spending time with you 

Not all the time, otherwise in his opinion the time he gets with you will feel less special 

But when either of you have a bad day he likes to either cuddle you and take a nap or hold you while you both/ he plays video games 

Ben’s a ghost? Thing so his body is always cold 

That’s one of the reasons why he loves holding you so much is feeling your warm body against him 

He likes to nap on your tiddys because 1) he’s perverted and 2) he likes to hear your heartbeat 

He finds the sound of it fascinating 

Sometimes he feels his pulse just because the shock of not feeling anything is fun to him 

Ben is probably one of the easiest pastas to date 

He’s like a house cat

Just give him attention and water and he can fend for himself all good 

Eyeless Jack 

Giving Gifts

Jack in love is a very very confusing thing 

Not because he’s contradictory but because the way he flirts sometimes ties into his demonic animalistic tendencies 

For example 

His gifts to you can sometimes be very sweet things that instead are normal gifts like flowers or chocolates but instead small things like breakfast in bed after a stressful mission (He may or may not use his acting like a doctor as an excuse yes EJ is the mansions doctor fight me bitch)

and then other times it’s organs like a heart or an eyeball, bones or a skull (sometimes animal) and sometimes even teeth, if your lucky most of the time once more they just belong to some pour animal in the woods 

and they say romance is dead

Jacks way of showing love is sorta a mixture of how some birds gift their mates things to flirt and how cats give their owners dead animals

He’s cute I swear 

Acts of Service

Unlike Ben jack isn’t going to drop everything to please you 

but once again the way he shows his love is more casual(?) (I mean he gives you dead things to show his love that ain’t casual)

and if he’s in a good mood/ had a good day then more often than not you’ll find yourself being spoiled in a completely Jack way?

You’re thirsty? He made you both coffee/ tea/ hot chocolate 

You’re on a mission and it’s raining? Take his jacket (not like he’s gonna die from the cold)

You’re hungry? Take a snack from his secret stash that no one else is aloud to go through (though most of the time it’s filled with organs)

Jack hates it when his lover is stressed so he likes to do whatever he can to help them out 

Physical Touch

I hate to sound stereotypical but Jack does this the most because he is extremely touch starved 

Trust me he’s not into PDA at all but behind closed doors he’s finding any excuse he can get to touch you ( with your consent )

he loves sleeping together because usually at night he’s reading or trying to piece together his broken parts

But when he’s holding you in his arms, and whispering how much he loves you in your ear when he’s sure you’re asleep he feels like he doesn’t to be whole 

that he can’t expect you to fix him at all, but being with you is enough to make him feel like instead of being broken, being fractured is alright 

But weather it’s his hand on your cheek on your hands laced together Jack likes to feel your skin against his 

fucckkkk I’m tired, this like took three days, you’re getting a part two when I don’t feel like my head’s trying to kill itself and no I did not spell check this nor will I ever as spellings for pussys and people who graduate school 

#Creepypasta #Creepypasta x Reader #cp #Cp x Reader #Imagines #Headcanons #Ticci Toby #Ticci Toby x Reader #Ticci Toby Imagines #Ben Drowned #Ben Drowned x Reader #Ben Drowned Imagines #Eyeless Jack #Eyeless Jack x Reader #Eyeless Jack Imagines #Jeff The Killer #Jeff The Killer Imagines #Ticci Toby Headcanons #Ben Drowned Headcanons #Eyeless Jack Headcanons #Jeff The Killer Headcanons #x reader

[darksides-dutchess]

And now the sides as thing my friends and I have said

Virgil:*sends a long and felt message on how he cares about his friends*

Janus: Are you being held at gunpoint?

--------------------------------------

Everyone: *baking a cake*

Remus: Let's write dilf on the cake.

Virgil: WHY?!?!

Remus: cause Patton said to write something you like on your cake.

--------------------------------------

Logan: I have never felt more joy since I was in high school and the teacher said that my work was the best among everyone and that was the confidence boost I needed to realise I am the baddest bitch ever.

---------------------------------------

Remus: I want a spicy chicken sandwich actually two with no fries and plain water.

Janus: I will strangle you

---------------------------------------

Patton: From now on I will now be known as the Frog King bow down to your new ruler and hold fear in your hearts about the power I withhold.

Everyone: ALL HAIL THE FROG KING!!!

---------------------------------------

Virgil: WHO THE FUCK MADE ME A FLOWER CROWN IM ALLERGIC TO POLLEN.

Janus: I did.

Virgil: Of course you fucking would.

----------------------------------------

Roman: *watching a movie* what is this platonic or romantic? I genuinely can't tell the difference.

Remus: Honestly who cares. We can't let some guy for old England tell us the difference.

-----------------------------------------

Janus: All in saying is that we should at least fuck our friends once just to understand the feel of it.

Logan: I'm not having sex with you.

Janus: >:(

------------------------------------------

Roman: if there is one thing you need to know about me is that I am a sad queer kid that romanticises everything in his life but has never been held in the arms of anyone who genuinely loves me.

------------------------------------------

Patton: Is it just me or does the Khan Academy guy actually sounds kinda hot?

Remus: FINALLY SOMEONE FUCKING SAID IT. IM NOT ALONE ANYMORE!!

-------------------------------------------

Virgil: WOULD YOU STOP PLAYING NOBODY BY MITSKI ON REPEAT!!

Janus,through tears: I've bEeN BiG anD sMalL, AnD bIG aNd SmAll aGAin......

-------------------------------------------

Logan: It's times like these where I wish you could just shut the fuck up.

Remus: What I just said that doctors can perform brain surgery while the patient is awake.

--------------------------------------------

Virgil: Remus we aren't friends anymore, you're going in the DNI section of my tumblr bio.

Remus: SHAWTY IS GIVING ME A FREE SHOUT OUT!!

--------------------------------------------

Janus: Okay patton you had your turn with the kitten now its our turn.

Patton: NO!

Logan: Give her to us Patton.

Patton: If any of you dare to take Luna (the cats name) I will not hesitate to place a lego peice after ever step you take.

Everyone:*slowly backs away*

--------------------------------------------

Roman: if you ever met a straight guy and he says he does musical theatre, that man it the biggest liar known to our generation and is living in a closet made of glass.

--------------------------------------------

Virgil: I feel like you were a lesbian in your past life.

Patton: Oh definitely 100% agree.

--------------------------------------------

Remus: The reason I am so disappointed in myself is that I am a whore living in a virgins body. I have been fucked 78 times in my head but never in reality.

--------------------------------------------

Logan: I would rather get stabbed 54 times in the chest by a toothpick and pour lemon juice into my eyeballs than to share a bed with you.

Roman, who snores way too loud: Understandable, have a good night, hope you sleep with one eye open.

--------------------------------------------

Janus: OMG!! I love the look you are going today, the eyes bags from crying yourself to sleep over a boy that doesn't care about really compliments the I didn't get enough attention as a child and now I get overly attached to people way too quickly, you're killing it!!

Virgil: 🖕😐🖕

--------------------------------------------

Remus: I would eat the communist manifesto.

--------------------------------------------

Virgil: I'm not saying I wanna die but if I was in a dark alley and someone just stabbed and left me there to die............. I wouldn't be disappointed.

--------------------------------------------

Comment if you wnat to see more of the weird shit my friends and I say

Reblogs appreciated

#sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #sanders sides incorrect quotes

[rahleeyah]

It’s been a few days and I’m sitting at work late still thinking about your Liv and Dodds long term secret affair post and it is canon to me now. But also thinking about the potential that backstory adds to their last scene together where he tells her “don’t worry about me, I’ll be back”

Bring him back then!! Give me Dodds showing up as the new Deputy Chief for OC after clawing his way out of his Staten Island traffic purgatory. Give me Liv at the OC office to say hi to El (newly back from undercover) or meet with Ayanna and Dodds stopping by and them running into each other

And the last time they saw each other was the last time they slept together: after her captain promotion ceremony (he stood in the back and came over that night to bring her flowers) and they shake hands like professionals but there’s something in the way they’re looking at each other that makes Ayanna smirk and Elliot glare

“I told you I’d be back, Captain” and she can’t help how much she’s smiling at hearing that from him. “We miss you over at SVU, Chief.” “Bet you never thought you’d be saying that back when we met.” And they catch up on squad news, standing close, radiating their Amicably Divorced Co-Parent Energy through the room

And Elliot’s always been jealous of the men Liv sleeps with but consistently throughout the show he’s been even more jealous of the men that she’s worked with, especially if she’s worked with them well and they have a rapport (see Porter, Ash, etc). And here’s Dodds: a man Liv has both slept with and worked well with and Elliot can tell, he can always tell, so he hates him at first sight but this is his boss’s new boss and he’s been working on that whole self control thing since he’s been back so there’s nothing he can do but grimace as if the two of them are stabbing him in the eyeballs (they kind of are)

Liv does have to get back to work though, and Dodds offers to walk her out since he only came by OC to introduce himself. And maybe he lets his hand linger against the small of her back as they head to the door, he’s not her boss anymore so it’s not technically inappropriate. And maybe she lets him because she’s pleasantly surprised by how nice it is to see him again like this. And maybe Elliot wants to eat his desk while Ayanna (who is beyond sick of this hetero drama) just pats him on the shoulder and tells him to get back to work and save being a jealous boyfriend for his own time

“I’m not her boyfriend” Elliot grumbles, almost petulantly, because they haven’t exactly had time to discuss what him being home for good now means for them, what they want it to mean (but wait maybe they already kissed once when he got pulled out but they haven’t talked about it because this is EO, so Elliot’s irritation is compounded by that). “Well it seems like someone else might be interested in the position, so if you really want it then maybe you should work on that”

THIS!!! IS!!! EVERYTHING!!! OH!!! MY!!! GOD!!!!

Amicable exes Dodds and Liv. Her relief at having someone she cares for back in her life. Elliot eating his own liver. Every. Single. Word. Of. This.

Bestie you did that

I need this I'm gonna revisit this ask like it's a fucking fic EYE-

(I'm literally watching s18 right now and he is in her apartment and I am feeling all the things)

I want Elliot to see it so bad. To see that Liv's life is full of people he doesn't know. To see that she's not just waiting around for him, that if he doesn't make a move he will lose her, to someone brave enough to reach for her. And he can't stand the thought that maybe it's too late, that maybe he waited too long.

This is so messy and delicious I love it

#e.o asks #s.vu #liv.dodds

[haikyuuwaifu]

Ch.1

Genre: Angst. Drama. Fluff, Humor

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of Sexual Intercourse, Sexual Language

Present Time

MASTERLIST

Woke Up Late

The sunlight peeking through the open curtain, caused the lump in the bed to groan. Rolling over, he moved to pull the comforter over his face. Snuggling deeper into the pillow under his head, Hajime’s breaths evened out as he let himself drift back to sleep. 

A few minutes passed, before his eyes shot open in frantic panic. Sitting up abruptly, he swore at the throbbing feeling behind his eyeballs. Rubbing his hand over his face, Hajime gave himself a few seconds to get his bearings, and reopened his eyes. Looking around the room, he could see his clothes, but everything else was unrecognizable. Reaching for his phone on the night stand, Hajime swore when he was met with a black screen. 

“Yer finally awake!” A voice shouted, pulling Hajime’s eyes to the entrance of the room he was currently occupying. “Y/N went to go grab something to eat, so feel free to join us.” the blonde offered waving his hand behind him. “Just make sure you’re not wearing a shirt handsome. House rule and all.” He winked, as his boyfriend came up behind him to effectively smack him upside the head. “Don’t be so loud Atsumu, he’s probably hung over.” Sakusa sighed, peering into the room. “You can put a shirt on, my boyfriends just a dumbass.” “He doesn’t need to Omi, just let us peruse the eye candy for a while.” Another voice muttered, his eyes raking up and down Hajime’s form. “You into men sugar?” A silver haired man asked, winking coyly before making his way toward the kitchen. “Samu, when Y/N finds out you propositioned her night time lover, she’s going to stab you.” Sakusa implored, setting a towel in on Y/N’s dresser. “She should be back shortly. If you want, you can shower.” Hajime nodded in thanks, before laying back down in an attempt to grasp anything from the night before. 

-Hajime is both flattered and a little on edge that strangers find him attractive.(It’s the being the best friend of Tooru Oikawa complex) He’s also opted to stay in bed until Y/N comes back, but he def. wants to shower. 

-Y/N doesn’t bring people home. She’s spent the last year or two working on herself and living her best life. Thanks to her last relationship she has trust issues BUT something about Hajime, made her want to give him a chance.

IWA’S BITCHES| SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY FROM HOME 

@dabilove27 @victory-is-here @that-chick212 @sempiternal-amour @amberalisa @elianetsantana @lia-faerie-queen @oppositesunchild @black-rose-29 @loveinhaikyuu @koutayoomi @renhold-nightspear @prettysetterboiss @its-the-aerieljeane @letmebreathepls @honeybeelia @a-little-pebbl​ @marvelousmimicry​ @roselleviennesstuff @trashy-simp​ @boosyboo9206​

#last night #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu concepts #haikyuu #haikyuu smau #smau #iwaizumi hajime #iwazumi hajime #iwazumi scenarios #iwazumi imagines #iwazumi x reader #atsumu x sakusa #atsumu scenarios #atsumu miya #atsumu imagines #sakusa kiyoomi #osamu scenario #osamu imagine #osamu scenarios #haikyuu suna #suna rintaro imagine #osamu x suna

[quazartranslates]

Welcome to the Nightmare Game II - CH48

**This is an edited machine translation. For more information, please [click here]**

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

-----

Chapter 48: Star Death Reality Show (XXXI) {cw: misgendering}

"Will Qi Leren be alright?" Dr. Lu, who had already run away, looked at Du Yue behind him in a panic and murmured in a low voice, "I have a bad feeling."

"Qianbei will be fine," Du Yue said confidently.

"No, let's go down and have a look. If he’s in trouble, we can help," Dr. Lu said.

"Okay, let's go." Du Yue was fine with it.

The two people studied the route to find the safest passage. Dr. Lu's sense of direction was bad, and Du Yue wasn’t much better. Two headless flies wandered around the institute and accidentally found intermittent blood on the ground.

The two walked along the blood trail, and finally found the injured Lara in a hidden room. Her injury wasn’t serious, but her spirit was not good. After seeing Du Yue and Dr. Lu, she was silent for a long time, and her voice was hoarse as she asked: "Have you seen Jing Siyu and Jing Sixue?"

The two shook their heads, and Lara sighed: "I'm afraid they’re in danger."

Lara told them what had happened after they ran away. Jing Siyu and Jing Sixue disappeared quickly, but Janet, Alex and Lara were together. They’d had an argument because Francis had been parasitized by an octopus. Janet strongly suspected that Lara was parasitized, and Lara would naturally not admit to such false accusations. During the argument, they met Leviathan, who had been thrown off by Qi Leren once before.

Janet, who was the closest to Leviathan, was the first to be killed. Alex tried to escape, but Leviathan jumped up again. Alex, who was eager to get rid of it, tried to push Lara out, and even stabbed Lara with a dagger. However, Lara had a strong will to survive. She took the dagger regardless of her injury and stabbed Alex’s vitals with a knife. She hid in a room, locked the door, and crawled away from the vents.

After that, Lara tenaciously fled the whole way, and finally came here and met Du Yue and Dr. Lu.

"We also met the monster, and Qi Leren led it away. Here's the thing..." Dr. Lu plainly told the story again, and finally asked, "We’re going to find Qi Leren. Would you like to join us?"

Lara touched the wound on her hand and nodded firmly: "Let's go."

This time, all three people were in a heavy mood. Especially after seeing the incomplete bodies of Jing Siyu and Jing Sixue, Lara cried sadly and asked aloud, "Are we the only ones left? Is Qi still alive?"

Janet and Alex had undoubtedly died by Leviathan's mouth, as well as Jing Siyu and Jing Siyue. Francis, Annie, Mark and Xue Jiahui were all parasitized. He Yi became Leviathan’s host. Only four of them had survived, and among them, Qi Leren’s life and death were still uncertain.

"Of course he’s still alive!" Dr. Lu said firmly. "He must still be alive!"

　　&&&

In the vast underground ice palace.

"Prophet, are you awake?" A blindfolded woman stood up from the chair of carved ice and respectfully saluted him. The ice and snow maids who were responsible for guarding the underground ice palace also bent over in salute.

"Soothsayer? Is it your rotation today?" asked the Prophet.

"It should have been the Iillusionist’s turn, but he had something to do, so we changed it," the Soothsayer replied.

"How is that boy recently?" When it came to the Illusionist, the Prophet's tone was clearly casual.

"Not bad, I heard that he made an interesting new friend, and he played tricks on others all day long." The Soothsayer smiled and asked again, "This time, you slept for a much shorter time than expected. Is something wrong?"

"It's not an accident." The Prophet frowned and looked up at the dome of ice and snow, but his line of sight seemed to pass through the thick layer of ice and look at the vast universe.

The blindfolded Soothsayer could not see his expression at the moment, but she could feel his inner unrest.

"Someone has discovered their original force, and that force is biased towards us," said the Prophet.

The Soothsayer breathed a sigh of relief, smiled, and said, "Isn't this a good thing? Although it’s only the first step, it’s always ahead of the other sentient beings on the starting line. Maybe it will eventually condense a half-field or even a field."

It was only the first step to discover one's original force, and it would take some difficult self-testing to condense a half-field, but this already meant that this person was about to embark on a road different from ordinary players. Any master at the field level started from this first step. Although most people would fall in the long road of experience, everyone who had reached the field level had terrible strength.

The Prophet sighed faintly: "It’s too early to talk about field condensation... Although I’m optimistic about him, I didn’t expect it to be so fast. This may not be a good thing for him. There are still too many problems in his body that have not been solved."

The Soothsayer asked curiously, "Do you know that man? What is his original force?"

The Prophet sensed the new force full of vigor and hope, and gently spoke the answer:

"Rebirth."

　　&&&

In the deep underground glacier wrapped in eternal cold, the temperature was 60 degrees below zero. When human beings were exposed to this environment, it only took a few minutes for the blood in the nose and ears to be unable to maintain circulation because of the cold, and the cells would quickly die.

This underground world without light seemed destined to be forgotten in the cold.

Crushed skull, whole body fracture, ruptured organs, internal and external bleeding... Worse than that, when falling from that height, the speed would return to zero at the moment of contact with the ground, and the body would be deformed instantly under the huge force of the impact. Even the space alien Leviathan, whose vitality was extremely terrible, was seriously injured after falling and fell into a deep sleep.

To say nothing of a human being.

Death was the only outcome.

But suddenly, something moved in the ruinous "tomb" created from broken ice.

And then moved again.

Qi Leren felt as if he was in an icy hell. Every time he breathed, thousands of ice needles punctured his internal organs crazily, which made him feel miserable. He couldn't even think of why he felt so painful and cold, or where he was.

Under this inhuman pain, he only felt that he didn't want to live any longer, but he couldn't even die.

Breathing returned, heartbeat returned, he still couldn't open his eyes, he could only move with all his might. The stones and ice blocks on his arms also moved and collapsed violently, and his sound echoed in the lifeless darkness.

Qi Leren's consciousness gradually returned, and he remembered who he was, but he still didn't realize where he was. He complained crazily in his mind that the air conditioner in his room was too cold, and that he had even accidentally fallen from the bed, and now he couldn't move.

But how could it hurt so much? It was like all his bones were broken.

Qi Leren's confused thinking leaped illogically. He saw many things, and the broken pictures rampaged in front of his eyes, but they just passed away. All he remembered was that he saw a pair of blue eyes.

Blue eyes.

Ning Zhou.

The name suddenly appeared in Qi Leren’s, which was like a spell to unlock the seal on his memories. Countless heavy memories were bearing down, which were more painful than the rose thorn stuck in his heart.

He was going to find Ning Zhou, and he was going to bring him back.

Qi Leren finally recalled his mission, and he began to struggle, struggling to get up from the tomb built from broken ice. Just turning over exhausted his strength, and he had to lie prone on the ground and breathe for a while, only to recover his strength slowly.

He noticed the time. It has been twenty hours since he’d fallen from the ice cliff. It was ten o'clock on the fifth night. The fifth day’s Best of the Day had already been announced, but he didn't know who it was. At the same time, his privacy time has been reset with the new day day, and he had another ten hours.

If you fell from such a high place, the tracking camera should be damaged. If not, the low temperature here should make it unable to work normally. But just to be on the safe side, turn it off.

"Turn off the camera." Qi Leren squeezed his voice out of his dry throat, and coughed wildly as soon as he finished speaking. His mouth was full of the fishy sweetness of blood, which made Qi Leren feel queasy.

Suddenly there was a light sound in the dark, as if a stone had been pushed down.

Qi Leren immediately took out a flashlight from the item bar and shone it in the direction of the sound.

Not far away, there is a mound of rocks and crushed ice, and a tentacle was slowly sticking out from the inside, which was extremely slow and seems to be seriously injured.

That thing wasn't dead yet? Or did it sense the breath of the living again and wake up from hibernation?

Qi Leren struggled from the ground. Although he was mysteriously resurrected, his left hand, which was bitten off by Leviathan, still didn't grow back. If he tried this again, he would only die.

But fortunately, he had a key item that had cooled down.

When the Prophet's Heart was used again, Qi Leren felt subtly different from the last time. The phantom angel falling from the sky came to him and took him away from the terrible world to the carefree Garden of Eden. Under the cover of God's grace, he didn't need to worry, and he didn't feel fear. The world was like sand in his hand, and he could easily knead it into the shape he wanted.

Heavy rocks and ice were pushed away with a flick, exposing Leviathan lying on the ground dying. This horrible monster had a red eye, and this huge eyeball was full of ferocious madness.

There was an invisible giant clock behind him, and the pointer walked quickly. As long as it finished three laps, the power he borrowed would be like the chime of midnight, dissipating all magic.

He had to hurry.

Qi Leren held out his hand and raised his palm in the void. Leviathan floated and began to roar and struggle, but this degree of resistance had no effect before the original force. Moving the palm of his hand slowly, Qi Leren felt that he could easily knead it into pieces, just like what he did to Mark's octopus.

But this was not the only way. Qi Leren felt the mystery of time and carefully explored its secret. A mysterious feeling emerged in his heart. He rubbed his fingers and the sands of time slowly flowed down in his hands.

Leviathan floating in the air as if it had been cast in magic. Its shell was rapidly aging, coated with a layer of rust, and finally it seems to be petrified. Its body was full of cracks, and finally it turned into powder like beach sand, which sprinkled to the ground slowly, leaving a golden treasure chest and a round sphere.

Qi Leren waved his hand, and these two things fell into his hands. The treasure chest was opened, which was an item.

[Lucky Revolver: There are six slots in this gun’s chamber, one of which is loaded with a bullet. Shooting at one's own temple can give one minute of absolute defense within a radius of 500 meters around the locked target, but the absolute defense is invalid for this bullet. Even if you are lucky, God will only give you five minutes. If you are not afraid of death, you can continue for another minute. Locked target: not set.]

Qi Leren immediately decided that this was of no use to him, because he would blow his head off with the first shot, and unless it was matched with S/L, it was a waste.

Disappointed, he looked at the other object, which was an eyeball as big as a bowl. The scarlet pupil seemed familiar. It was called [Leviathan's Eyeball].

What was this thing? There wasn’t even a brief introductory description, which reminded Qi Leren of another prop without a brief introduction, namely, the "Scepter of Hell", which Maria had entrusted him to give to the Prophet.

Time was running out, and the clock representing his time limit only had half a rotation left. The translucent wings behind the Qi Leren lifted him, flying over the deep underground glacier, crossing the collapsed ice tunnel, flying all the way along the coming road, and returning to the iron door at the entrance before time ran out.

"Qi Leren? You’re still alive? That’s great!" "Qianbei! Are you alright? Qianbei! How did you grow wings!" "Qi, are you alright?" The three people wandering around the door with flashlights rushed up in surprise at the sight of Qi Leren.

Prophet's Heart’s time was up, and Qi Leren landed on the ground. After the sacred power retreated, he sat down weakly and walked out of the underground ice cave with the help of the three panicking people.

"It's okay, it's all taken care of. Just in case, we should quickly leave here, seal the exits, and wait for rescue." Although Qi Leren was still in the aftershocks of coming back from the dead, his mind was clear, and he clearly commanded the three people. He was worried about whether there were any octopuses hatching in the research institute, but he was afraid to say it now, for fear that after his mouth moved, his good luck would run out.

Du Yue had great strength, and single handedly carried Qi Leren, who had lost his arm, on his back. He listened to the three people say what had happened after they’d split up, learning that after discovering that the other people had become Leviathan's food, the three people had come to the bottom of the institute to look for Qi Leren. They went in several times, but the temperature inside was horribly low. Unlike Qi Leren who had been blessed by the holy light, they finally had to retreat, worried that Qi Leren was dead.

Qi Leren didn't say that he and Leviathan had fallen off the ice cliff together, only that Leviathan had fallen off, and that he was injured and unconscious for a long time but didn't die. Finally, God blessed him and gave him strength to return to them.

Dr. Lu and Du Yue were very embarrassed, but Lara was very moved. She took Qi Leren's remaining right hand and sincerely said, "When we go back, introduce me to your teachings. I’m willing to be baptized."

Qi Leren, who had no intention of preaching at all, was in a distressing situation. One atheist has destroyed the worldviews of another atheist through acting skills and unscientific miracles—maybe more than one. Should he be sealed as a saint or something?

They left the underground research institute, blocked the exit, left the basement, and returned to the surface. The night was bright and the whole land was covered with white snow and ice. Lara, who was the first to leave the room, pointed to the sky in surprise and shouted: "Look, what is that!"

The three people raised their heads and looked at the approaching black spots.

"Is it... Is the rescue coming?" Dr. Lu was excited.

"Great." Qi Leren also breathed a sigh of relief. The copy was coming to an end, and they could return to the Nightmare World soon.

The spacecraft was getting closer and closer, and before long, they would be able to board the spacecraft safely and leave, but the spacecraft was slow to land. The four people waited anxiously, just like waiting for a late plane.

"It seems like something’s wrong." Lara stood up and looked at more and more spacecrafts that had no intention of landing. "What are they waiting for?"

A thought flashed through Qi Leren's mind: "Are they a civilian spacecrafts?"

"No, these are..." Lara said, her voice stopping abruptly.

A beam more dazzling than sunlight converged on the muzzle of the spacecraft, and the terrible energy was aimed at this planet!

Stunned, the four people watched the devastating attack on the plane beneath their feet, and they couldn't help feeling shocked. They had never thought that, after escaping death from a horrible space alien, they would finally die at the hands of their own people. In order to prevent the octopus from spreading, the army gave up the idea of a rescue landing and blasted the whole planet to pieces at a safe distance, where there was no risk of contact.

At the last second in this copy world, Qi Leren and the others were judged to have completed the task requirement of "surviving until the army arrived", and left the world in the light of the blast.

-----

Editor’s Notes: Obviously those items can only have positive results, right?

As a bonus for the end of this arc, BMBL wrote a collection of the program audience’s reactions on her Weibo. They’re posted as images so I can’t easily throw them into an mtl, but here’s the link for anyone who wants to take a stab at it: https://weibo.com/1741082525/F4b6D7Upr

-----

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Mission of Mercy: Sixteen

Any protest Bucky might have had was drowned out when your lips crashed into his and your hand tangled in his hair. Not like he had any protests. He’d missed you while you’d been away and now that you’re tangled around him like a hungry, needy vine it feels like he’s whole again. 

“Hello,” he chuckles, “D’ja miss me?”

You make a soft noise and hide your face in his shoulder. You’re tired. And hungry. And all you want is to go to sleep. This is one of the missions that makes you miss your old life. You hate interrogations. And you hate dealing with people that hurt kids. 

It makes it very hard to stay reasonable and rein in all your skill to hurt someone. To make them never want to get out of bed again, let alone give up the information. 

When you sniffle Bucky tightens his arms around you and hefts you a little more comfortably against his side, “Shh, I’m here,” he hums, rocking you gently. “Don’t cry, baby.”

You know he hates it when you cry. And you can hear your mother’s voice in the back of your head. Telling you you’re being dramatic. Telling you that you’re making things up. Telling you to stop being a brat. Stop manipulating. You’re trying not to cry. Trying to hold yourself together. 

“It’s okay,” he murmured, easing himself down onto the couch and rubbing your back. “I’m here, I know.”

You take a deep breath and look up at the ceiling, forcing yourself into a state of calm you don’t feel. You know, in the back of your head that you’re allowed to cry. Those feelings are allowed to be too much. That Bucky doesn’t hate it when you cry because he feels manipulated. He hates it because it hurts him. He doesn’t want you to cry because it breaks his heart when he can’t help you. 

Bucky watches you carefully and rests his hands on your thighs, smoothing slow circles into your skin with his thumbs. “Too close to home?”

You nod and let your forehead gently against his shoulder, the weight thudding against the metal with a small hollow thud. “Hey! Don’t dent me,” he chuckled. “What about some dinner?”

When you shake your head and sit up slowly, Bucky smiles just a little, “Not hungry or is your stomach in knots?”

“My stomach is in knots,” you sigh, “I don’t think I can eat.”

“What’s got you twisted up?”

Bucky asked but. He wasn’t sure you’d answer. He knew that you played some things close to the chest because you’d been told certain things. He’d heard your mom say them to you. And accuse you of not caring that your brother was dead. And after that, he didn’t wonder why you spoke so carefully. Or why you were very cautious about the emotions you showed on your face.

“I just-” you make a soft noise and thud your head back against his shoulder. “I fucking hate dealing with kids.”

“I know,”  he soothed. And for a long time, he didn’t say anything else. He cuddled you against his chest and rubbed your back. “Do you ever miss it?” he hummed. 

“Miss what?”

“Working with kids,” Bucky answered. 

You take a deep breath. “Sometimes,” you murmur. “It was- an experience. And it was valuable… I mean. I cut my teeth in a kids psych ward. Dealing with riots… hell. You know what scar on my ribs?”

“Yeah?”

“I got stabbed with a piece of a metal door trying to break up a fight.”

“Jesus,” Bucky breathed. He’d wondered. He’d seen all the little scars. Traced them with his finger tips… the same way you’d done with his as the moonlight shimmered across bare skin. In the hazy twilight between asleep and awake. In the warmth and comfort of the afterglow. He’d never asked about the little scars. He knew some of the stories. Because he’d heard Joe tell them. Or because he heard you tell someone who had asked. And now reflexively he reached for your side. The jagged mark that he knew he’d find, starting at the middle of your rib cage and zig zagging to just above your hip. “A fucking metal door?”

“He really wanted to beat the other kid to death,” you explain, “And I just happened to be in the way. It wasn’t personal.”

Bucky snorted and rubbed your side. He knew, in the back of his mind, that there were probably a lot of times in your life where you might have died. Where he might never have gotten to have you in his life. But that didn’t mean he liked thinking about it. 

“So you don’t miss it? Not really?”

“Sometimes I do,” you murmur. “Kids are funny.”

Bucky snorted and you smile a little, “They are,” you protest. “I remember once,” you tell him, “I was working with one of my kiddos. We were in the gym. And he went to toss a ball at me. I missed and he bonked me in the nose with it.”

He looked at you sideways, waiting for the funny part and you smile a little. “Later that day he stuck an eyeball sticker to my forehead so I’d see better next time we played ball.”

“How old was he?” Bucky asked, stroking your hair. 

“Seven,” you answer, “He was the littlest kid on my unit.”

Bucky smiled. He understood why you didn’t want kids. And he knew that he wasn’t terribly enthused about kids either. But. He’d by lying if he said you wouldn’t be a good mother. He’d seen you interact with kids. When your former clients saw you on the street. You knew what to say to them. Your face lit up, every time. And more than once when that had happened, Bucky wondered where you’d learned it because your mother wasn’t that way. But. Bucky also knew better than to tell you you’d be a good mom. You didn’t want to hear it. You heard it enough from your mother. 

“If not dinner,” Bucky said, rubbing your hips, “What about a bath?”

If you knew what Bucky was thinking, you gave no sign. Instead you quirked an eyebrow at him, “Are you trying to seduce me?”

Bucky grinned and kissed you slowly, “Maybe,” he rumbled, “Is it working?”

“Almost,” you tease. 

“Only almost?” He popped you lightly on the back side and mock scowled. 

“Can I have a backrub too?”

And the mock scowl melted into a laugh. “Oh so I have to work for it?” 

“Please?” and when you bat your eyes at him Bucky sighs. Mock put upon. 

“Never met a needier dame in all my life,” he rumbled, kissing a line down the side of your throat. And he feels a thrill when your heart rate hitches up and there’s a new tension in the muscle under his hands. 

“Please?” 

And you sound breathless this time. Less teasing. And there was no telling you no. Not about a back rub or anything else you might ask of him. You could ask him to tear out his own heart and he’d present it to you on a silver plate. 

“Bath first,” Bucky hummed. It felt good. It felt right. When you nodded and melted into him, trusting him to take care of you. Trusting him to make it all better. And he didn’t care if you intuited that he needed the control or if you needed him to take care of you. It felt like heaven. 

So as he picked you up and carried you to the bathroom, your head on his shoulder and your arms around his neck, he smiled.

#Bucky x reader #fluff #hurt/comfort #mild angst #flirting

[darkmulti]

Invisible

sadist!Seonghwa x female reader

⚠️Warnings: wall sex, rough sex, oral (fem receiving), choking, marking, established relationship, spanking, dirty talking, degradation, hair pulling

This story may be triggering to some, as it does talk about some sensitive topics, or maybe it’s just me and it kinda made me cry idk, but its like 3 am so maybe its just me. Point is, it is REALLY angsty.

PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

——————————————————————————-

“Seonghwa, are you even listening?”

Your fingers snap in front of your boyfriend's face and he looks up at you with a bored expression.

“What?”

He asked rudley.

You rub your temple trying to remain calm. He has been so frustrating lately and was constantly on his phone as well.

“Nothing, it’s nothing. Whatever content your phone is providing you is probably more important than your girlfriend.”

You said bitterly. Seonghwa doesn’t respond and looks back at his phone. Not wanting to fight with him, you get up off the couch, grab your keys and go for a drive.

“Where are you going?”

“Nowhere”

And with that you walk out of the door, not looking back. As you left the front porch, the door opened, meaning Seonghwa was following behind. As a instinct your legs move faster and before you know it, you bolt to your car. You made it to the car, but Seonghwa already caught you before you could get in.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? When I ask you something, you reply like a good girl.”

His words caused tears of frustration to gather up in your eyes.

“Is that all you fucking care about Seonghwa? Controlling my life, but not actually loving me. I have to obey all these rules, I have to please you in every way possible, but when I start talking about my issues you totally ignore me and act like- like I’m invisible.”

Tears now threatening to leave your eyeballs. You blink them back and your breath becomes shaky. Seonghwa stares at you. His face was emotionless. Maybe he wanted to breakup. You deeply inhale in attempt to stop your shaky breath, and say

“I think we should break up. It would be for the best…. this relationship is not for me and I can’t continue to live like this Hwa.”

Tears are flowing down your face, while you swallow your sobs away.

“So what? We break up and pretend none of this happened? That we never happened? Is it that easy for you to just throw it away like that, like it was nothing?”

“No no, of course not. But Hwa I gave you more then one chance to fix things up. You never took it seriously.”

“Don’t call me Hwa anymore, I only let people who are close to me call me that.”

Ouch, that stung harder than it should have.

You quickly wipe away the tears and turn around to open your car.

“Not so fast missy. I don’t want you back on my property again. Go pack all your shit, then leave.”

He really was a monster. A careless and ruthless sadist. Taking a deep breath in you walk past him, and enter the house. You run upstairs, grab a suitcase and start packing your belongings.

Seonghwa watches your every move. He leaned on the door frame of the walk in closet, and watched you lose yourself while packing.

Fifteen minutes later, you finish packing. Seonghwa moves out of the way to let you go. But just when you’re about to walk out the door, he pulls your hair back and throws you on the bed.

“You’re so naive, it’s actually amusing to watch.”

“What?”

“Don’t ‘what’ me. What in the world goes on in that tiny little head of yours? I’m not going to let you leave me. Y/N, you seriously have the audacity to question my love for you? After everything that I’ve done for you. You still think of it as nothing? You’re in the process of teaching me how to love again, you can’t just leave me, like how everyone else left me. I’m sorry that I’m not affectionate, but I’ve told you, that’s not my fault. I love you enough to tell you the mortifying things that happened to me as a child, that I wish to forget. But I didn’t. Instead I told the love of my life, so that she could help me with it.”

Seonghwa looks up at you and sighs.

“I’m sorry for the rant. You can leave if you want to. I guess I was meant to be alone for the rest of my life.”

His words shatter your already broken heart. Seonghwa never talks about his feelings, and now that he is, you’re afraid he might view them as negative things that were stupid and useless. Your head spins, not knowing what to do. First of all, you didn’t even know you had such an affect on him. Him calling you the love of his life, warmed your heart but stabbed it at the same time.

You dustpan all your thoughts up and without thinking twice, cup his cheek and pull him in the most passionate kiss ever. Tears stream down your face, and rub on Seonghwa’s face. Seonghwa immediately responds and wraps his hand around your waist and tightly holds your body close to his, while exploring your mouth.

You pull away and giggle.

“I love you so much Seonghwa.”

“I love you too.”

Seonghwa gently places you on the bed and starts taking both of your clothes off, stealing kisses in between.

“I still have to punish you, because you tried to leave me.”

“Go right ahead daddy. I deserve it.”

Seonghwa can’t help but smile at your submission.

He kisses your lips, then makes a trail of hickeys. Placing them all precisely, making the path clear and perfect on your soft, beautiful skin.

His tongue lays flat on your clit, teasing you, until he starts to flick it to get some reaction out of you. Well, it worked and your hands immediately went to his hair. You twirl his hair around your finger, and move more down onto his face, so he can go harder.

Seonghwa gets the hint, and goes in harder. Your booty was squirming around against his face, until he bit your clit and you yell out,

“OUCHIE! Hwaaaaaa!”

He didn’t say anything. Instead a smirk grows on his lips and you feel it on your pussy.

“Come here baby girl.”

Seonghwa picks you up and slams you against the wall, thrusting his dick up in you, without warning.

“Ahh! Fuck hwa, slow down!”

Seonghwa growls at your request and pounds himself harder into you. He wraps his hand around your neck, squeezing it harshly, leaving no breath in your mouth. Soon, you felt lightheaded from the lack of oxygen and the hard cock thrusting in your core. You tap on Seonghwa’s hands and look at him with pleading eyes.

He lets go and only speeds up his hips. You try your best to catch your breath, but in a matter of time, Seonghwa places his hand right back and gives it another squeeze.

You squeal out and tap on his hand wanting out again. He slams you back against the wall, and let’s your legs go. With little to no effort, Seonghwa turns you around and slams into your pussy from behind.

He picks you up and bends you over the vanity, so you can see him fucking you.

“You like this baby girl? Tell me, am I making you feel like a whore taking you in this position? So you can watch me fuck the guts out of you?”

You do nothing but pant in response. Unfortunately Seonghwa didn’t take this as an answer. He grabs your hair and pulls it back, giving a hard slap on your hot face. His hand moves from your face to your ass cheek and he spanks it hard enough to bruise it.

“I l-love it da-daddy. Just take me! Fuck me tILL I DIE PL-please.”

You were too tired and distracted to answer the question, so you sputtered some words out.

Your eyelids feel heavy and you close it for just a second until he lays another slap on your already bruised ass cheek.

“Don’t sleep on me princess. I’m almost here.”

As soon as he said that, your knees wobble and you cum all over him uncontrollably. Seonghwa places another spank and with one last thrust, fills you up with cum.

“Do you feel invisible now?”

——————————————————————————

Another shit smut. Okay, I’m going to bed now. You probably didn’t enjoy but 🤷‍♀️

Xoxo, n❣️

#seonghwa smut #ateez smut #seonghwa #park seonghwa #park seonghwa smut #ateez seonghwa

[buckmecaptain]

With Two Os

So, I did a thing for @just-one-ordinary-fangirl​ ‘s #JOOF500Challenge , and I miiiiight have gone a little overboard with the prompts.  Maybe.  Kinda.  Sorta...uhh... I did them all.  (I tried to make sure I bolded them all in this post)

This is silly fluff -falls just short of a crack fic- Steve X (barely described) OC (she has a name and nickname, but that’s about it), with a hint of her having a bit of a thing for Bucky, and even Thor (mentioned).  Semi-oblivious Steve, Natasha as the voice of reason, overdramatic OC who might just be kind of a dumbass.  Pining, mentions of the rest of the team.  Obviously, this story ignores canon and everyone is happily living in the tower. :) Warnings:  A few naughty words, suggestive situations, so much dumbassery

Image is from knowyourmeme.com

-   ---  --   -  ---  -- -   ---  -- ---

 She pushed her long messy braid over her shoulder, then looked down at the table and sniffled, slowly stroking her fingertips over the glossy surface.  “So it's over, then.  We're finished.”

“Roxy,” Steve began, reaching for her, “I'm sorry, I-”

She flinched away from his touch.  “No. You're gonna have to give me some time.  This relationship... it isn't what I thought it was going to be.”  She wiped her hand over her face and sighed heavily.

“I said I was- wait, what?  It isn't?”  His eyebrows were knit tightly together, raised comically high,  shoulders hunched like he was trying to make himself smaller.

Turning to face the Captain, her lower lip trembled and eyes were wide.  “It was meant to be us.  Me and you, Roxanne and Steve, until death do us part.  And now you've destroyed that.”

“Seriously?”

She gasped and flung herself backwards onto the overstuffed sofa, one arm thrown across her eyes.  “Yes, seriously.  You left an undefended gap and the Empire blew up our base!” she whined, gesturing toward the tabletop game with her free hand.

Across the way, Wanda turned to Sam and asked, “If she's this dramatic when she loses a game, what happens when she wins?”

The Falcon chuckled.  “Well, let's just say she puts on a show.  Dancing tends to happen.”

Steve shook his head at Roxanne's antics.  “Well, that's enough Star Wars: Rebellion for tonight. What's next?”  He clapped his hands together and they began placing the game pieces back into the box.

“Are Thor and Bucky here?  If so, I volunteer for naked Twister,” Roxanne offered.

The Captain whipped his head around and gave her the Eyebrows of Disappointment.

She peeked at him from under her arm. “Hey, a girl can dream, right?”

“Let me guess.  It's game night and Roxanne's team lost, right?”

“ 'Tashaaaaa!”  Roxanne made grabby hands at the redhead.  “So glad you're home!  It's been forever and I miss waking up next to you every morning.”

Sam, Wanda, and Steve all did sitcom-worthy double-takes as Natasha snorted.

“Well, if you would set your damn alarm at night, I wouldn't have to come drag your ass out of bed in the mornings for training.”  She looked around at the other three people in the room.  “What?  She's like a sloth.  Or maybe a koala. Whatever, she sleeps incredibly soundly and clings, even when dragged out of bed by the ankles.”

Roxanne sat up and crossed her arms, pouting.  “So?  I need my rest.  It takes a minimum of eight hours of sleep for me to look this good.”

Natasha turned to Steve and smirked. “You guys lost pretty badly, huh?  Little Miss Queen-of-the-sore-losers is in a snit.”

Roxanne grumbled and dug out her phone from the couch cushions.  “Fine.  I'mma text Bucky.  He'll sympathize.  Or, wait... Nat, do you have Thor's number?”

Steve's hands clenched into fists at his side and he grit his teeth.  Natasha noticed, of course, but didn't react.  “He doesn't have a phone, Rox.”

“Really?” she sat up, wide-eyed, “Who doesn't have a phone these days?” she glanced back down at her screen.  “Aw, man.  They're canceling my favorite zombie drama. That's stupid with two Os,” she muttered as she ambled out of the room.

Natasha watched her leave, then whirled to face the fuming Captain.  “Really?  You're still pining over her?  When are you going to nut up and say something?” she prodded, glancing at his white-knuckled fists.

A muscle in his jaw twitched.  “It's pretty obvious she prefers Buck.  Or Thor.  Or both, you heard her,” he shrugged and looked toward the doorway, then sighed.  “I'm not going to chase after a rejection.”

She chuckled and shook her head. “Methinks you might be stupid with two Os.  That woman has had the hots for you since she joined the team, and she's pretty much made a fool of herself for you for the last year.”

He groaned and dragged a hand over his face.   “Why is dealing with women so difficult?  It's just-just impossible,” he complained.

“Steve, you deal with aliens, terrorists, and murderous lunatics on a near-daily basis.  After all that, you still think women are difficult?”

He sighed and placed his hands on his hips.  “Bad guys can be dispatched, arrested, or otherwise stopped. Dealing with women takes finesse, and I don't have any of that. Or experience.  Give me a murderous lunatic any day of the week. I'd much prefer that.  The serum doesn't help with this one,” he grimaced.

Natasha's eyebrows raised.  “Okay, Captain Wuss,” she teased.

“That's the first time I've been called that,” he mumbled, “at least, to my face.”  The only reply was the Black Widow's signature smirk, so he hung his head and huffed.  “Sure feels like I'm being ganged up on around here.” He went in search of the rest of the team in an effort to continue game night, following the sound of cheering and whooping to the media room.

Apparently a high-stakes game of Mario Kart was the cause of the cacaphony.  The team was gathered on the plush seating, with Wanda, Sam, Clint, and Bucky playing while Vision and Roxanne watched and cheered them on.  

Steve squinted when he saw Roxanne was seated on the back of the couch behind Bucky.  He was wedged between her legs and she was running her fingers through his hair, detangling it as she encouraged him to “Kick their asses, Buckaroo!”

Disappointed, Steve frowned and turned to leave, almost crashing into Natasha in the process.

She glared up at him, silently stamped her foot, and pointed forcefully at Roxanne.

Steve shook his head and gestured with his thumb over his shoulder, then crossed his arms over his chest.

Natasha squinted.

He shook his head again.

She raised a finger and circled it in the air, then pointed again at Roxanne.

Steve shook his head again.

Natasha placed both hands on his chest and shoved, making him stagger back a step, then jutted her chin toward Roxanne.

He rolled his eyes, but the redhead poked his chest so hard, he coughed.   While he was distracted she took him by the shoulders and spun him around, then shoved.  He stumbled forward a couple of steps, then glared at her over his shoulder.

Natasha placed her hands on her hips and tapped her foot.

“Oh what the hell?” he thought, and marched over to Roxanne, standing directly behind her.  She didn't notice because of the game noise, so he leaned down to her ear and loudly asked, “How's it going?”

In the blink of an eye, Steve found himself flat on his back with Roxanne on top of him holding a wickedly-sharp blade to his throat, wide-eyed and panting.

“Sorry!  I didn't mean to scare- Put the knife down.  Please,” he pleaded.  “Roxy?”

Roxanne tossed the knife aside and scrambled off of him, then ran out the door.

Steve lay there splayed out like a starfish, staring at the ceiling and wondering why fuckery kept finding its way to him, as his team mates gathered around.  They peered down at him curiously, barely-concealed amusement on each face.

“Hey Steve, you dead?”  Bucky asked, his lips twitching in an effort to keep laughter at bay.

Clint snickered.  “Dead from embarrassment, maybe.  Rox is crazy fast!”

Groaning, Steve pressed his palms into his eyes.  “You should go talk to her, Buck.”

“Huh?  Why me?”

Sitting up, the Captain eyeballed his best friend and snorted.  “Obvious reasons.”

Bucky blinked, then looked from Steve to Natasha.  “The fuck is he talkin' about?”

She shrugged.  “He thinks Rox has a thing for you.”

“Oh.  Oh!  Really?” Bucky hummed. “I should go talk to her.”  

Steve made a strangled moan as Bucky headed out the door, then stood and straightened his clothing.  “See you guys later,” he grunted and left the room as his team mates watched, helpless and confused.

*  *  *  *

Roxanne was seated at a window and brooding when she heard the tentative knocks at her door.  Ignoring the first few was easy, but it became more difficult when the knocks turned to loud booms. Grumbling, she made her way across the floor. “Okay, gimme a second.”  She yanked open the door to find Bucky on the other side.  “Oh, hey.  Come in.”   She went back to her window seat while he stood there shifting from one foot to the other. “Close the door, and sit down.”

He complied and took a seat on the overstuffed armchair.  “Everything okay, doll?  You kinda took off in a hurry earlier.”

She didn't bother to look at him, her gaze still fixed outside and fingertips trailing over the weave of the curtains.  “I pulled a knife on Steve, Buck.  Steve!”

“Yeah.  It's not the first time that's happened to him.  Won't be the last.”

“First for me.  He's my Captain.  My friend.  My very dear friend!” she insisted, “You don't hold a knife to your friend's throat!”

Bucky smirked and scoffed.  “I've done that.  And shot him.  Stabbed him, beat the hell out of him... and he's been my closest friend for eighty years.”

Roxanne pinched the bridge of her nose and grimaced.  “That is an entirely different situation...uh, entirely, and you know it.  He's never gonna forgive me for this, and even if he does, I won't forgive me.”  She slammed her fists down on the wooden window sill with bruising force, a resounding crack echoing through the room.

 Bucky was across the floor in an instant, taking her trembling wrists in his hands. “Doll, you're scaring me.  Please, just, calm down.”  They stayed like that until Roxanne's breathing slowed and the shaking stopped.    Finally he released her wrists and wrapped his arms around her as she leaned against his chest, swaying them back and forth.

“Ohh, I feel better already.  You're really warm.” She snuffled at his shirt.  “And you smell good,” she complimented, resting her hands on his sides.

He flinched.  “Thanks.”

Roxanne curled her fingers and he flinched again.  “Oh, Bucky... you're so...” she curled her fingers again, “Ticklish!”  She attacked his sides in earnest as he tried to fend her off carefully.

“Doll,” he squirmed, trying to back away from her, “Woman!  You'd better stop,” he warned.

She narrowed her eyes and smirked.  “Or what, Buckaroo?”  Snaking a hand into each of his armpits, she unleashed tickle hell.  “No mercy!”

Bucky bit his lower lip, trying to stifle his laughter.  “Okay, girly,” he snorted, “You've messed with the wrong person.”  He twisted away from her and crouched.

Roxanne backed up and her eyes went wide.  “Oh shit.  I've triggered the Big Bad Wolf!”  She giggled crazily and sprinted across the room, vaulting over the couch.

The chase was on.  Roxanne had the advantage of knowing the living space like the back of her hand, but Bucky was the superior tactician, so she she managed to keep out of his reach by the skin of her teeth.  He finally cornered her in the bedroom, where she'd ended up standing on the far side of her bed, plastered against the wall.

“I've got you!” he laughed, and leaped onto the bed with a victory shout, planting both feet in front of her.

Roxanne squealed and Bucky's fingers contacted her ribs, then they heard a small cracking sound.  “Uh oh,” she whispered as the bed tilted precariously and slammed to the floor.  They both lie there in a heap for a moment before disentangling from one another and jumping apart, Roxanne at the foot of the bed, Bucky at the up-tilted side.  They looked from the crazily leaning mattress to each other and back again, then burst into laughter.

“Not exactly the way I pictured us breaking my bed,” Roxanne quipped, waggling her eyebrows as she pulled the bed away from the wall and surveyed the damage.

Bucky's face flushed deep red and dared to glance at her.  “So, uh...” he trailed off.

“Hm?  I think I have something I can use to prop this up until tomorrow,” she murmured distractedly from the low side of the mattress.  “No big deal.  I was ready for something new anyway.”  The mattress shifted hard and she looked up to see Bucky was perched on the high side.  She held up a hand, forbidding him to continue.  “Sir, that slide is for children only.”

Bucky snorted and slid across the surface anyway, landing neatly beside her.  “Lemme see.”  He raised the mattress and box spring with one hand and peered at the broken side rail, then grimaced.  “Yep, snapped right in half. I'll hold this up while you get the blocks or whatever,” he offered.

When it was all put right, Roxanne hugged Bucky, thanking him for helping.  If they held on a little longer than friends do, neither mentioned it.  “Wanna watch a movie?” she offered, breaking the sudden tension, “You can choose.”

He agreed and she hustled off to take a quick shower while he searched through the titles for the new horror flick she'd been excited to see for a while.

When she returned she shimmied under the covers next to him and sighed happily.  “You found it!  Been waiting for this one.”

“Uh huh.  You're gonna fall asleep, you know.”

“No way.  I've been looking forward to this movie for months!”

“Right, sure.  Wanna bet on that?”

She growled playfully at him.  “All I want to do right now is cuddle with you in bed... is that too much to ask?”

Bucky waggled his eyebrows at her. “That's all?  You sure, doll?”

“Well,” she turned to him and trailed her fingers over his chest. “I also want you to take off your pants.”

He blinked.

“You gonna?”

He blinked again.

“Earth to Bucky.”

“Uh, sure, okay.”  He pulled off his sweatpants and tossed them carelessly to the floor.

“See?  Isn't that more comfortable? Oh,” she squinted at him, “You are wearing underpants, right?”

He blushed furiously.  “Roxy!  Of course I am!”

“Okay, geez.  Those sweats are pilly and scratchy.  Ugh, how can you wear those?  Get comfy and let's watch this flick.”I've been looking forward to this movie for months!”

They joked and snarked at the movie as it played – it really was written poorly – and generally laughed so much, they missed half of the dialogue.

“Are you kidding me?” Bucky snorted as the main characters made yet another idiotic mistake in the haunted estate.  “This would never happen if it was you and me in their place, doll.”

Roxanne nodded.  “Right? I'd freakin' lose it, I'd be all up in your face like, 'How could you lose our children in our own house?'  Bah!”

They made it through to the end and put on a dumb comedy afterward, but they were both fading fast.  Yawning widely, Roxanne squeezed the arm Bucky had wrapped around her waist.  “Thanks for helping me feel better, Buckaroo.  You're awesome.”

“I sure am,” he chuckled. “Anytime, Roxy-girl.”

They nodded off halfway or so through the movie, warm and comfortable in the temporarily-repaired bed. Bucky awoke somewhere around two o'clock and eased his way out of her quarters, still in his t-shirt and boxers, sweatpants in his hand.  As he quietly closed the door and made his way to his room, he failed to notice he was being observed by his best friend.

Steve stood at the corner, watching Bucky leave his girl's room, sadness and jealousy bubbling in his gut.  He scoffed at himself for calling Roxanne “his” in his own head and spun around to hit the gym again... only to come face-to-face with Natasha.

“Seems like I'm always catching you running away from Rox,” she quipped, and folded her arms across her chest.

He sighed.  “Not running away. Leaving.  She's already had, uh, company.”

“Who, Barnes?” she snorted, “I have it on good authority that she didn't bang him.”

The Captain raised a brow.  “Oh yeah? How's that, spycams in her bedroom?”

“Careful, Rogers,” she warned. “Because you're hurting, I'll let that one slide.  Here.”  She tapped at her phone a few times and handed it over, open to a messaging app.

Rox:  Natty!  I need HELLLLLLLP! Please!!!

-What's the matter?  Who do I have to murder?

Rox:  NAT

-No, really.  I will.

Rox:  Nothing like that.  I freaked out after almost stabbing Steve and Bucky came to check on me and long story short I asked him to snuggle in bed with me.   Did I fuck up????????

-…

Rox:  Hurry Natty!  Need answers I'm in the bathroom and need to leave!

-There's nothing wrong with you SNUGGLING with Bucky.  

Rox:  that's all we're gonna do I swear.  He's super hot but we're not there yet ya know???

Rox: gotta go thnx I love you!!!!

Steve read and re-read the manic message exchange a few times, letting it sink in.  He gave Natasha her phone back and dragged a hand over his face.  “Dammit.”

“Uh huh.”

He stood straighter, hands on hips, and cocked his head at her.  “That still doesn't mean they didn't... fondue.   Going by the timestamp on the messages, they had plenty of time for that.”

Natasha huffed and slapped him hard on the arm.  “If Rox had been planning on doing Barnes, she would have asked for wildly different advice.”

With a look, he urged her to continue.

“Oh dear God, you just might be stupid with two Os.  She's asked me for sex advice before, obviously.”

Steve frowned.  “I don't need to hear this.”

“Actually, I think you do.  Remember when you watched 'The Wizard of Oz' with her in your room and she took an oddly long time to bring the popcorn?”

His jaw dropped.

“She asked me how it was possible for you to be such an adorable puppy and so smokin' hot at the same time.”

His face went scarlet.  “She asked you that?”

“Yep,” she nodded.  “Compared you to a giant yellow labrador retriever puppy.  She was hopeful, but it didn't happen.  I mean, obviously.”

“I have-  I need to-  I've gotta go. Thanks, Natasha.” He stepped around her and jogged toward the elevator.

She watched him go, shaking her head and muttering, “All the men in this tower share the same brain cell, I swear.”

Roxanne was dreaming peacefully, quietly snoring into her pillow and curled up burrito-style in her blankets, when she was rudely jolted awake by a loud thumping. Snorting in a completely unladylike manner, she forced herself out of bed and across the floor.  

She slumped against the wall and snarled, “It's four in the morning, what do you want?”

Shuffling sounds came from the other side of the door.  “It's, uh, it's me.  Steve.  May I come in?”

“Oh.  Yeah- yes, please.”   She swung the door open wide to allow him inside.

“Are you okay?  You were so upset when you left, and I- I thought you might still be... sad?”

“Really?”

He nodded quickly.  “Yeah, so I thought I'd bring something to cheer you up.”  He produced a plush yellow Labrador puppy from behind his back and thrust it toward her.

Blinking, she gently took the stuffed toy.  “So you thought I was sad, because of...earlier.”

“Yes.”

“And you really thought buying me a puppy was going to cure my sadness?”

His expression mirrored the stuffed pup's exactly and she smiled fondly at him.

“Well... you were right.   Thank you!”  She tucked the gift under one arm and hugged Steve with the other before gasping and jumping away from him.  “I'm sorry!”

“Wait, what?  Why are you apologizing?”

Eyes glassy with tears that were about to spill over, she blurted, “You must hate me!  I put a knife to your throat, Steve.  That's not something you just brush off.  We're- we're f-friends.  Close.  You're my Captain!”  there was no stopping the word vomit now, as mortified as she was.  Might as well rip off the Band-aid.  “And you're amazing and smokin' hot and I've had the biggest damn crush on you for so long and all I want to do is kiss your stupidly handsome face, and...  Oh no,” she whined and covered her face with both hands.  “On a scale from one to ten how much do you want to punch me right now?”  She asked quietly, peeking at him between her fingers.

Concerned, Steve placed his hands on her shoulders and gently squeezed.  “Sweetheart, slow down.  Just breathe for me, okay?” he soothed.  “First of all... No, I don't hate you.  We're not there just yet.  You'd have to do a hell of a lot worse than pouncing on me with a knife to make me hate you,” he grinned at her.

Roxanne winced.  “I- I don't-”

“Are you saying you're plotting my demise as we speak, doll?”

“Steve!  I would never, and you know it,” she denied.

He laughed heartily at her distress. “Okay, okay, sorry.  Just giving you a little grief.  I'll let you get back to sleep.”  He turned to the door.

“Yeah, like I'm gonna be able to knock out again after all of this.”

Steve sighed.  “Want me to go get Buck for you?  Maybe he can help.”

Roxanne rolled her eyes and tossed the stuffed dog onto the sofa.  “Steve Rogers, you big, gorgeous idiot!”

He blinked.  “Um.  I'll take that as a compliment...I guess.”

She flung herself at him and wrapped her arms around his neck.  “I've been mooning over you for a year now and- and I didn't know how to- didn't think I should say anything.  It's not my place and...”

He held her close and smiled.  “I've done my share of pining, too, sweetheart.”

“I have an idea,” she said, then leaned forward and pressed her lips to his for a short and sweet kiss.  “Wanna go stargazing and cuddle under the moonlight?  What's left of it, that is,” she suggested.

“On one condition.  Call me your ‘Captain’ again.”

Trailing her fingertips over his chest, she fluttered her eyelashes and in a breathy voice, asked, “Would my Captain like to go up on the rooftop with me?”

Steve’s chest rumbled and his eyes darkened.  “Yes ma’am, I’d like that very much.”

Later, bundled up together on one of the rooftop chaise lounges, Steve and Roxanne weren't doing much stargazing.  Caught up in the closeness, the newness, instead they spent the pre-dawn time making out and murmuring sweet nothings, as lovers do, until Steve's phone alarm sounding at half-past six pulled them from their serotonin haze, and they both groaned in irritation.

“We probably should have gotten some sleep, sweetheart.”

“I was sleeping soundly until somebody pounded on my door,” she teased, and poked his chin.

“Uh huh.  Was it worth it?”

“I dunno... I was really comfortable, and I need my beauty sleep or I wake up looking like sea hag.”

He tutted and kissed her forehead. “Aw, I'm sorry, doll.  How can I make it up to you?”

Tapping her lips with her fingers, she pretended to consider his words.  “How about... another cuddle session?  Longer this time and with more kissing.”

“I think I can manage that,” he grinned.

“Oh, and bring Bucky.”

He gasped and tickled her mercilessly.

“Okay, okay!  Enough!”  She kissed him soundly, then they untangled from the blankets and headed for the door, hand in hand.

Steve sighed wistfully.  “We wasted so much time, you know.”

“Yeah,  maybe we really are stupid with two Os,” she teased, nudging him with an elbow.

He chuckled and opened the door for her.  “Maybe so, darlin'.  Maybe so.”

She passed him and sauntered toward the residential area, calling back over her shoulder, “About bringing Bucky along, though-”

Thundering footfalls sounded behind her as she squealed and ran for her life, giggling madly all the way.

#JOOF500Challenge #steve rogers fanfiction #avengers fanfiction

[365days365movies]

March 14, 2021: The Holy Mountain (1973) (Part One)

Happy Pi Day! What’s on the menu?

...Oh dear Christ. Looks like it’s a cloud pie, because this one’s gonna be OVER my head. And yes, I realize that it’s Pi Day after the irrational number, not the food. Which is ALSO fitting because I’m sure we’ve got a fuckton of irrationality coming my way, and I am...not ready? Yeah, yeah, I’m not ready.

But OK. Who actually made this movie? Alejandro Jodorowsky? Oh.

OH. This...I should’ve put this in goddamn Experimental June, huh? Well, shit. I ean, it fits in with the patter of films I’ve been watching recently. You know, Greek mythology, Japanese folklore, then a surrealist film released by a notable director? And Jodorowsky is notable...in film circles, anyway. He’s not exactly a household name, but he is very well-known regardless.

Alejandro Jodorowsky is a Chilean-French man best known for his Mexican films. So, yeah, already interesting there. His Wikipedia article describes him as such, right off the BAT.

Since 1948, Jodorowsky has worked as a novelist, screenwriter, a poet, a playwright, an essayist, a film and theater director and producer, an actor, a film editor, a comics writer, a musician and composer, a philosopher, a puppeteer, a mime, a lay psychologist, a draughtsman, a painter, a sculptor, and a spiritual guru.

Dude had a movie made ABOUT HIM TRYING TO MAKE A MOVIE. That would be Jodorowsky’s Dune, a documentary film about Jodorowsky’s attempt to make an adaptation of the book Dune, well before the actual first film came out. And people LOVED that film. The film about a filmmaker making a film...I am frightened.

And I’m not going to spoil it for you, but in looking for the GIFs of this movie...guys, I am FUCKED. I’m a boring-ass man, in that I’ve never so much as smoked a cigarette, and I have the feeling that I’m gonna feel high watching this movie. I am NOT ready. But OK, with that, let’s just get into it, huh? Let’s get this trip over with. SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/2)

Two women are staring at me. And so is a dude dressed all in black with a crazy hat, as chanting goes on in the background in a white room with black crosses on the walls, and we’re JUST JUMPING RIGHT THE FUCK IN, HUH?

The title comes up, dude just rips their clothes off, and YES THERE IS A GIF OF IT ON TUMBLR ALREADY, and I’m probably gonna flagged for that, BUT WHATEVER

He shaves their heads, they enter a warm embrace of sorts, AND THEN WE MOVE ON TO A POINTED EYEBALL SURROUNDED BY PEACOCK FEATHERS I AM COMPLETELY LOST

Well, actually, as the credits play, backed by a sound which I can only assume is the creaking of the opening gates of hell, there are a number of objects and artifacts, with peacock feathers seeming to be a common theme. And then...a man with the tarot card The Fool next to him pisses himself in the desert as flies cover his face, a cougar standing over him and roars, a bullfrog looks at some tarot cards, and a legless and handless man with the Five of Swords card strapped to his back comes to wake him up with the aid of several naked children, who tie him to a fake cross and throw stones at him.

ALL OF THIS HAPPENS IN ONE MINUTE, AND I DIDN’T EVEN MENTION THE FLOWER GROWING STABBED INTO HIS PALM

Somehow...I underestimated this movie. I DIDN’T THINK IT’D BE THIS CRAZY THIS QUICKLY. Well, after...THAT, the two men share a cigarette and hug as the Swords guy licks his forehead, and they walk into the city. There, we see some grizzly ass shit. There’s a truck carrying the bodies of killed native people, a firing squad shoots some kids who...bleed black, and a fuck-ton of sheep who’ve been skinned and fake-crucified are marched down the street as a bunch of rich people watch on. Also, another firing squad shoots at some kids, and birds fly out of them.

I think the people watching are tourists, and this...might be fake? One of the fake soldiers takes one of the tourists aside, and just...starts fuckin’ ‘er. In front of her husband, as people take pictures of the whole thing. I...I am more confused than I have EVER been.

By the way, I don’t know ANY names for this yet, so I’ll add them...whenever I figure it out. Our pair apparently entertain these tourists, and make money doing so. They work with a circus called “The Great Toad and Chameleon Circus”, who perform a pantomime of the conquest of Mexico, using...costumed toads and horned lizard. And it’s...I mean, it’s definitely bad for those animals, but it’s also kind of adorable?

The horned lizards represent the Aztec, while the toads represent the Spanish. And, uh...yeah, it’s literally exactly what I said. The Spanish toads go after the Aztec horned toads, and overwhelm the fake Tenochtitlan with their sheer numbers. What’s weird about that? WHAT IS SO WEIRD ABOUT THAT TO YOU?

There’s also a lot of...what I’m assuming to be fake blood, but with this movie, I worry. The whole dead sheep thing has me concerned AND THEN THEY BLOW UP THE SET AND KILL THEM ALL WHAT THE FUCK MAN? How did this film escape animal cruelty shit?

And then...look, you’re gonna have to get used to weird-ass shit happening here, OK? And for the record, I’m desperately trying to weave some symbolism out of things here. Like, this is clearly a criticism of tourism and wealthy cultures taking advantage of the disadvantages. It also seems to be anti-religious, although...I’m not sure if I can articulate that one yet. Still, this part of the film seems to be about the disadvantaged native people being used as essentially objects by the rich foreigners. I mean, they just used the Spanish Conquest of Mexico, for God’s sakes. It’s a new form of conquest, but modernized.

Right? OK, OK, maybe I can do this after all. What’s next? 

A bunch of overweight dudes dressed up as Roman soldiers, alongside a guy dressed as a nun, are selling crosses and Catholic materials to the tourists, while the Fool and Swords pretend to be Jesus Christ for them. This eventually leads to them goading the Fool into a drunken stupor, then making a plaster mold of him before leaving him on a pile of potatoes. Eventually, he wakes up and screams, surrounded by hundreds of casts of him painted as Jesus Christ, as the Roman soldiers and the nun dude sleep.

Angered at his own commercialization, Fool whips the nun and soldiers, and destroys all of the Jesus statues. Meanwhile, a group of women - of different races and ages - and a chimpanzee stare at a gilded statue of Jesus in a church.

Sure. Why not? WHY NOT?

 Also, they’re prostitutes, and one of them is, like, a child. Fuck. Said child is approached by an elderly man, who giver her his fake eye, than proceeds to kiss her hand...A LOT. OK, I know there’s something to be gleaned from that. Said prostitutes meet the Fool, who’s carrying the Jesus cast. Most of the laugh at him, except for the one carrying the chimpanzee, which I’m assuming is a Mary Magdalene reference.

She follows him, and the other prostitutes follow her, but they all stop when they come across a group of civilians dancing with soldiers. The Fool walks through this crows alone, and ends up in a dilapidated church, where he finds an owl and a priest, who’s sleeping with another Jesus statue. Angry that the Fool’s brought in his own statue, he kicks him out. The Fool then eats the face of his statue, then takes it back to the children from earlier, ties a bunch of balloons to it, and lets it fly above the city, the kids, and the prostitutes.

I, uh...I don’t know. I DO NOT KNOW.

From there, the Fool goes into town, there a red tower stands in the square. Maui’s hook descends from the top, and the Fool climbs onto it. The hook takes him up, as “Mary Magdalene” watches on. And it goes up VERY HIGH, by the way. GODDAMN. He gets into a hole at the top of the tower, where he finds a white shroud, which he bursts through, only to find...

I’m so tired. I am SO TIRED, you guys. Our guy heads down the rainbow toward the camel, the naked woman, and the man surrounded by two goats, who I think is the guy from the beginning. He’s wearing the same hat, anyway.

He slowly and measuredly moves off his throne, as the music in the background intensifies, and as the camel is fidgeting, seemingly ALSO trying to figure out what the fuck is going on. The man gets into a brief fight with the Fool, but stops him by touching his chakras. With the help of the woman, he slices open a tumor on the back of the Fool’s neck, and extracts an octopus from it. Yeah. YEAH. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS MOVIE

The man offers him gold, in the FIRST UNDERSTANDABLE SPOKEN WORDS IN THE MOVIE I AM NOT KIDDING

They take the man to a pool, complete with baby hippo (what, do you not have your hippo in your personal pool, like a goddamn loser?), and the man gets cleaned, VERY thoroughly. Yeah, we see it.

In another room, with a pelican in it this time, the man has the Fool defecate in a jar, and also puts him in a container, where he sweats a lot. The guy collects his sweat in a hear-shaped jar, and continues his chemical reaction with the dude’s feces. It’s at this point where I think it’s appropriate to give the name of the man in the tower: The Alchemist (Alejandro Jodorowsky). Yeah. It’s the director. Take THAT, Hitchcock.

After literally turning his shit into gold, the Alchemist says that the Fool can do the same to himself, as he is shit. Yeah, he says that. And then, the two meet in a room of mirrors, where the Alchemist is now wearing a black outfit, and the Fool is wearing a matching brown one. They break a stone, in which we are told that each stone has a soul.

And then...tarot.

Yeah, that seems to be a theme, huh? According to the Alchemist, Tarot will teach the Fool to create a soul. I get the feeling that it’s meant to be within himself, but...I don’t know. Also, the tarot cars that we see are definitely supposed to represent previous scenes in the film, some of which we’ve already seen. However...they’re still pretty goddamn weird.

He gives him a few items, then brings in an ox and a turkey vulture. Goddamn, dude owns a zoo, huh? He uses the two to speak on the cyclical nature of life and death, and how organisms depend upon each other. This leads to yet another room, with a peacock in it this time, where he notes that the fish never seeks the fisherman, meaning that the master seeks a disciple.

In this final room, there are statues of people who are like him, and who will be needed for the coming journey, whatever that may be. They are industrialists and politicians, and each represents a planet...and maybe something else. They are, in order:

Fon (Juan Ferrara): Our Venus, and a bedding and clothing business magnate. He has many wives, who begin as workers in his factory, then are promoted to his “secretaries. He also has a fuckton of children as a result. His father began the factory, and is deaf, dumb, and blind. He makes all decisions by consulting his wife’s corpse’s vagina. Yup. Dear Lord. The company’s also made masks that have the texture, warmth, and smell of living human beings, allowing anybody to change their face to something more desirable. They also beautify corpses, and animates them after death. Fuck.

Isla (Adriana Page): Our Mars, Isla is first seen in a coffin-like bed, sleeping with the two bald women from earlier. After putting on her Prince suit, she wakes up her captive population of male secretaries, and her flock of black swans, and goes to her day job: manufacture and sale of weapons. We’re talking nuclear, biological, and fictional. They experiment with drugs that have various effects, and demonstrates them on many people, and make such unique things as psychadelic guns and grenades, and themed weapons for the religious crowds.

Klen (Burt Kleiner): Klen’s our Jupiter, and his house is huge, his wife is cold and unloving, and his chaffeur feeds him coke in the back of his black limo. He has a mistress that he fucks in the back of the limo, on the way to his art factory, where they produce a “new line” of art every season, using girls’ asses, and various other parts of bodies. He LITERALLY objectifies people. He also created a “love machine”, which is literally a robot box with a robot vagina that you fuck with a giant blue artificial penis. It is a...weird but interesting scene.

Sel (Valerie Jodorowsky): Sel’s a clown, who represents Saturn, and performs for children. Which makes sense, seeing that she’s a clown. She has a toy factory as well, where she sheds her harlequinesque vestments for a far harsher, stricter persona. Her toy factory is for war toys, and all of the staff and workers are elderly. Using a computer, they use their resources specifically to corrupt the minds of children to feed their political agendas, conditioning them to hate whichever enemy the government will face in the future, literally sowing prejudice and racism into their minds in preparation for a future war. Eerie.

Berg (Nicky Nichols): Uranus next! And Uranus is...EXTREMELY weird. Like, you know how you shouldn’t kink-shame people? That does not apply to Berg, both because he probably SHOULD be kink-shamed, and also because I don’t think it’s possible for him to feel shame? This entire section begins...real weird. Berg and his wife (Lupita Peruyero) are a very eclectic and unusual couple, but they aren’t as bad as the rest...I think? I mean, she’s literally knitting a sweater for their giant pet snake, and it’s kind of adorable. And then...we discover that Berg is a financial adviser to the president of a very wealthy country. He recommends that, in order to save the economy of the country, they kill 4 million people. THe president then activates the country’s gas chambers, gas schools, gas universities, gas libraries, gas museums, gas dance halls, and gas whore houses. Not a joke, that is actually what he says. And that’s...kind of hilarious? That segment ends with a picnic, and Berg says he hates his wife while surrounded by many very beefy bois. OK. My favorite so far, and that’s not even an exaggeration.

Axon (Richard Rutowsky): Besides having a HELL of a name, Axon’s the Neptune of this Solar System. He’s a chief of police. Which involves...a naked man chained to a table as many people chant and play drums. And then, Axon comes in with a GIGANT GUN, while bedecked in clothes made and worn by the forbidden love child of Mad Max and Roman soldiers. The ceremony is actually a castration, and it’s Axon’s 1000th castration. Axon commands many eunuchs, all of whom are trained to believe in him. It’s very...cultish. And that’s made worse when a group of protestors are attacked by Axon’s police force. They execute them, with the murder represented by interesting symbolism. Like, instead of blood and guts, it’s fruit and birds, and...also the thing above, which is funny only out of context. It’s also eerie.

Finally, Lut (Luis Lomeli): Lut is an architect, and our Pluto. In his house, there is a bevy of children dressed up as mice, who are playing hide-and-seek with him. Lut built a multi-family complex, but begrudges that they lost money in doing so. And so, to save money, he decides on a new concept for homes: basically just a box that people sleep in. Nothing else. He presents this at a party, where he unveils the house, which is essentially a coffin. He uses a sex show and women to sell it to the overindulgent rich. There’s also a well-sculpted ice penis involved, which must have been an interesting job to get for the guy who made that. Anyway, yeah, he’s trying to turn homes into coffins.

Jesus. That’s a good place to stop now, I think. See you in Part Two, goddamn.

#the holy mountain #alejandro jodorowsky #Horacio Salinas #Ramona Saunders #Juan Ferrara #fantasy march #user365 #365 movie challenge #365 movies 365 days #365 Days 365 Movies #365 movies a year #mygifs #my gifs #usermichi

[sanchoyo]

Looks like you’re gonna have to gush some more cuz I meant in general uwu🌸

🌺😌🤟 Always happy to! Okay here’s just some General bnha Thoughts ™ Mostly Lov centric. You asked for them, and you said GUSH about them, so here’s. A Lot! :)

This isn’t a lov one but it’s really funny so I thought I’d put it out there:

-when bnha was first gaining traction on tumblr, it was all art of Tsuyu. I have no idea why. People were talking about the funky frog lesbian superhero anime. Maybe it was just the people I was following, maybe it was a general trend, but I LOVED her design!!! my fav color and frogs r super cute!!! And I already loved superhero media, so I was like. I’ll watch it. For Her. SO. FROPPY IS THE REASON I WATCHED/READ BNHA. I went in thinking she was the protag and I was sooo confused when Izuku was... tbh I still think it’d be more interesting if she was lmaooo aus where? ...seriously if anyone has good aus where this is the case send them LOL

-I don’t actually feel that bad abt what Shigaraki’s doing. I still feel bad for him. I’m this post. yes im an apologist. its not my fault hes sexy and has been running around shirtless. hes a lesbian icon like thor is. I want to touch his hair. hes never done anything wrong in his life. he could kill all might, deku, bakugo, whatever, I’d still be sayin this. I don’t feel bad for gt. like. was anyone genuinely attached to him? lmao

-well u know how spinner’s quirk is just sticking to things? We haven’t seen him use it in canon except like, (1) time iirc?? I think this is probably bc he’s embarrassed about it even in front of the league... I loooove the idea that he gets more comfortable with it around them :”) and also how shigaraki. um. does that falling asleep thing while standing up with his eyes open, canonly? (which I still love lmfao) Imagine someone in the league walking in a dark room, turning on the light n just seeing. Spinner upside down, stuck to the ceiling asleep bc heat rises and its Warmer Up There. (cold blooded thing like tsuyu?? come ON give him a big fuzzy coat and scarf...) and Shigaraki in the center of the room, slouched but still standing, eyes open and motionless. Theyre both sleeping. Whomever sees it just...slowly walks out. LMAO

-Toga roller derby au. No deep thoughts I just think she’d be good at it. 

-Toga 100% is a social butterfly and could befriend anyone if they didn’t just judge the fact she was trying to stab them smh :/ (ok but seriously anytime I see cute friendships with her n the other kids im like :) aw. I feel like her and Camie...would be good friends. Camie feels chill enough to be like ‘ok whatever thats totally fine I forgive you!!’ LMAO we love airheads here)

-HOW DID TOGA GET SO GOOD AT FIGHTING? We know she’s been on the run since middle school or so, but good enough to pin Deku down after he’s been formally trained at a ~hero school~ for a while? (she pinned him TWICE I think, once when his arms were messed up, but, the other time as Camie, so? AND THEN WAS ONE OF THE 100 PEOPLE TO GO THRU TO THE 2ND ROUND OF THAT? even tho she didn’t bc she had to leave) good enough to beat Aizawa in a fight and stab him? A professional hero and teacher for YEARS? Is that seriously just street training??? Can people acknowledge how amazing her combat skills and reflexes are??? More Toga appreciation when?? Also her backstory??? SO subversive and incredible, hate when people reduce her to just a ~typical anime yandere~ :/

-Tomura doing stuff with his hands/fingers to train his quirk!!! And to learn to be careful with it!! obv I’m a Big Fan of him playing piano to do this and video games are prob the canon answer, but like, guitar or any stringed instrument that requires Hands would work too. Or knitting/sewing? EMBROIDERING? ??? Please, let me give you the mental image of him knitting aggressively while mentally scheming, watching a twitch streamer or smth too while doing it. (Doing stuff with your hands is a great way to let your mind come up with creative stuff, that’s how I come up with writing/drawing ideas 70% of the time)

-Tomura actually PREFERS cutesty, relaxing games. I mean, he does fighting and bloody stuff irl, games are a way to relax...he’ll play shooters and gta type games with The Lads, but. on his own?? animal crossing. pokemon. kirby games. mario. zelda. BIG ZELDA FAN (not saying this bc I, personally, am biased, but,) slime rancher, stardew valley, funny simulator games... he really enjoys those :”) God forbid he has a kid bc they’re 100% getting named after a viddy game character unless someone can talk him out of it LOL. Toga and Tomura are that animal crossing /doom meme where she’d be asking for doom and him asking for animal crossing :”)

-Bits and pieces of Before are kinda stuck in Kurogiri’s brain, but like. mostly useless stuff the doctor didn’t care about removing. Like, types of clouds. So Tomura kinda picks up on stuff like that. He can just look at clouds and tell you what type they are because Kurogiri used to take him up to high places in the city and point them out to calm Tomura down from a panic attack when he was younger. He can tell you if the sky looks like it’ll rain with a 80% accuracy rate too. 

-Kurogiri left food out for kitties in the alley beside the bar. They weren’t allowed in for Health Reasons (it IS a bar with sanitation standards!!) And Tomura really wouldn’t stop it or encourage it either way so long as Kurogiri did his job, but occasionally would stand outside with Kurogiri and just watch the kitties from a distance. If any approached he’d go back in (lowkey afraid he’d hurt them by touching them :( ) They kinda kept that between them tho, bc they both Know AFO is a big bag of dicks and no fun

-people have pointed out how similar aizawa and tomura look. this was 100% the intention. tomura has a hatecrush on him. THIS IS SO FUNNY AND HORRIBLY AWKWARD FOR KUROGIRI LMAO

-Sako??? Mr. Dramatic?? Opera fan. Drama kid. Like, obviously, but. Really. He is. I feel like he can speak a dozen languages. I also feel like he used to be an overachiever but got too ambitious. He was def some kind of leader at one point of a diff Group or something that fell apart. I LOVE how creative he is with his quirk and the magician theme??? incredible. I don’t show him enough love but I Love Clowns :o)

-I don’t care what their canon heights are. Spinner and Dabi? short kings. My height hcs are (tallest to shortest) Kurogiri, Twice, Sako (who also has heels on his boots and a tall hat, keep in mind), Tomura, Magne (Tomura and Magne are about the same height imo) Toga, Spinner, Dabi. LISTEN. Dabi has short energy. Sorry. it’s true tho

-This is a semi-popular hc I think bc I KNOW I’ve seen it before, but Dabi having Terrible Vision and needing glasses is so so good. (seriously, with burns THAT close to his eyeballs, how could he not?) 

-he tries to be a tough loner coolguy. you’d think he’d smoke, but I hc his ‘weak constitution’ comes with weak lungs (esp from years of a flame quirk?? inhaling smoke over so much time is SO bad for you, most people who die in fires actually die of smoke inhalation...) so he’s got like, an inhaler, can’t smoke, actually gets carsick, needs glasses, overuses quirk to save friends constantly, likes napping, a little awkward and rude. Tomura put him in charge of the vanguard so he’s smart, and good with strategies too, like a nerd. this is the Dabi I wanna see, not the popular fandom version of him tbh also step on hawks one more time sir :”)

-I wish all the lov fics weren’t?? villain!deku like I said earlier, but also, chatfics? I have nothing against them but most of them are just a bombardment of Memes with NO PLOT!!! Listen. text/chatfics CAN have plot and be an interesting way to tell a story. I almost want to write one just to show what I mean...

I know I’ve said I like spinaraki and blackmagic, but I am a multishipper, so a few ships I don’t talk about that I like that involve the lov in some way:

-toga/any of the 1A girls??? or Camie??? super interesting. ALSO in the radio drama, bakugo’s voice actor said Toga was his favorite girl??? so?? bakugo/toga ?? I WANT TO SEE IT. but specifically my fav dynamic with her is when someone ELSE is the one to like her first, it’s what she deserves.

-Kurogiri/aizawa/mic?? any variety of that is also 👌🏻 I also kinda wanna see kurogiri/all might bc. Dads. COME ON. they bond over ‘well, I raised him, and you want to have a part in his life now?? ok. earn it. prove it. I’ll screen you first’ or something LMAO they’re both genuinely concerned for the boy, and SOOO biased. let them bond.

-WAIT WHERE IS THE MIC/COMPRESS CONTENT. THEYRE BOTH DRAMATIC. ENEMIES TO LOVERS?? HELLO??? SOMEONE?? ANYONE. rarepair hours

-giran/twice is cute. like he was hyping him up so much and so ready to go save him...

-dabi/magne where is the content. when. why not everywhere??? I’ve also seen magne/compress which was cute!! or twice/magne? they’re the big sibs of the lov...

-dabi/spinner?? come ON dabi could get over his learned biases and spend time with him and they could hold hands. I want them to.

-dabihawks. Obviously bc the Drama. yes even still, don’t @ me. (also, shigahawks, seen some REAL interesting fics with it tbh) or spinahawks?? adding hawks to a ship is like adding extra chili powder. makes it SPICY dramatic)

-nine/tomura don’t @ me once again. both kinda afo’s playthings, nine obviously was the test for tomura’s new upgrades...they both love their friends...That Scene in the Flower field </3 hmmm tragicships are fun.

-tomura/mirko. more enemies to lovers. big fan of her and bunnies. remember when he wore bunny ears in bnha smash. (ok its crack but. CUTE.) 

-I’ve also seen shiganatsu and shigafuyu and I’m like. these are cute, but also Dabi’s reaction always makes me cry laugh. so good.

-MOST EVERYONE IN THE LOV IS LGBTQA+!!! heres my personal headcanons:

Toga: pan or bi (CANON BASICALLY)

Magne: transwoman (CANON BABEY) bi, leans towards men. (her crush on dabi in bnha smash... uwu content where)

Shuichi: gets sooooo flustered canonly, I think he’d go for the first person Who Hit On Him (I can see him being the target of those mean pranks where someone says ‘my friend likes you!!’ and the friend is like ‘eww!!’ :(((( ) he’s super hesitant for romance, lots of repressed stuff. gay but takes sooo long to realize it bc he thinks most women are conventionally pretty Aesthethically, feels obligated to Like Them, but has bad self esteem so never goes after them, then only likes (1) guy so hes like?? is this allowed?? is this allowed???? (HES LIKE. IN LOVE WITH SHIGARAKI)

Dabi: bi but rly hasn’t ever gotten to date anyone, so he’s actually more reserved about it and while he’ll tease, he absolutely is absent and kinda oblivious (again, I KNOWWWW bnha smash isnt canon, but. my god. when magne is hitting on him and he Just Doesnt Understand.) also hes ace

Tomura: doesn’t care. (just prob says ‘its whatever’) trans/nonbinary (i’M NOT PROJECTING, BUT. :’/) probably goes with like, the label queer if any but doesn’t care much for labels

Kurogiri: bi??? kind of??? I say kind of bc well, I hc U Know Whom as bi, I feel like thatd carry over but he’d be really avoidant to date anyone bc hes gotta Watch His Kid u know? this is gonna sound surprising but I think he’d be the type to be like ‘ok we can have a one night stand/fling BUT it cant get personal bc I have a Job to Do for my Son so don’t get up in your feelings’ and act a little coldly at first or very ..not personable... depending on who it was he’d prob turn around eventually, esp if that person valued his feelings/job :”)

Sako: that mans Not Straight. I hc him as gay and also trans :3c

Twice: Bi and HAS dated prob more than anyone else in the league imo, super comfortable with his sexuality and supportive of everyone else’s :)

ok that’s about all I can think of atm, come back in 5 minutes and my brain will refill with lov headcanons :3 thank you for asking!!

#bnha manga spoilers #bnha #sanchoyoanswersasks #league of villains #lov #i am NOt tagging all of them im so sorry its Too Much #but ask to tag #for triggers #if anyone needs them tagged #? #long post #word wall #bananaapplewaffle #im pretty amicable to most ships n stuff and love rare/crack ships lmao #also if anyone has their own headcanons #and wants to share #feel free! #love hearin them too

[chibistarlyte]

tomorrow is another day

“I think you should see someone, Shouto. A professional. They can help you,” Rei says, and Shouto can hear the quiet confidence in her words. Words spoken from experience. Who would know about this kind of thing better than her, after all?

Shouto nods wordlessly, pulling back and finally looking at his mother. She smiles softly down at him, and tucks some of his disheveled hair away from his face. “Is it scary?” he asks, already feeling the trepidation at the possibility of sharing his innermost thoughts and feelings with a complete stranger.

Rei nods slowly, her smile fading somewhat. “Yes. It can be scary, at first. And painful. Your emotions will be all over the place for a while. But…” she pauses, placing both her hands on Shouto’s cheeks to make sure she has his full attention. “Talking about this, working through it with someone who is trained to help people like you and me...it’s an important step to take so you can heal.”

here’s part 4 of my depressed!todo series with slowburn endgame todobaku. in this one, shouto talks things over with his mama and they decide together that he needs to seek professional help in the form of a therapist.

all my love and appreciation to kat @sunshineijirou for betaing this for me, and just generally being a wonderful human. ilysm friend!

you can read the fic under the cut or here on ao3! you can also find a masterlist of all my bnha fics here!

.

Shouto wakes to the smell of…breakfast?

It doesn’t smell like a Japanese breakfast with all the traditional fixings, but more like an American-style breakfast. The overwhelming aroma of bacon cooking in a skillet is what Shouto can pick out the easiest.

He blinks his eyes open, immediately squinting them shut again when bright sunlight stabs into his eyeballs. Shouto groans and pulls the blanket over his head—wait, blanket? He doesn’t remember having one of those before falling asleep.

Come to think of it, when did he fall asleep? He has no recollection of the end of the previous night. The last thing he can remember is listening to Midoriya laughing—his best friend squished next to him on the couch as the class watched a comedy film of some sort…

Shouto chances opening his eyes again in the relatively safe darkness beneath the blanket, and slowly creeps his head out to give himself a chance to adjust to the light. 

He’s still on the couch, cuddled up in the same corner he’d been in last night, but now with a blanket that he doesn’t remember having when he’d dozed off. 

And the smell of bacon is getting stronger. If Shouto listens closely enough, he can hear the sizzling of food in a skillet.

He stretches his arms out to loosen his muscles up, cramped from being squished against the arm and back cushions of the couch. He looks around the common room, a bit surprised to find himself alone. He would have thought at least some of his classmates would be up already—Iida immediately comes to mind, or Sero, or Shouji. Shouto remembers seeing them around in the early hours when he’s up before he wants to be.

Bakugou, as well, is an early riser.

Shouto turns his head enough to look over the back of the couch toward the common room kitchen, where he sees a familiar blond classmate standing in front of the stove with a spatula in his hand. Before Shouto is conscious of it, a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth.

He lets out a bit of a strained noise as he rises from the couch, curling his toes against the floor as he stretches his legs out, muscles sore from being curled up on the couch all night. He grabs the blanket and wraps it around his shoulders like a cape, holding it closed with his fists at his collar bone, and slowly pads across the wooden floors to the kitchen.

Bakugou seems to notice his presence, because his head shoots up and red eyes glare at Shouto from the other side of the countertop that divides the kitchen from the rest of the common area.

“Get your rest, sleeping beauty?” the blond teases with a smirk, not waiting for Shouto to respond before turning his attention back to the contents cooking on the stove.

A blush heats up Shouto’s cheeks before he can even think to fight it down. “That’s...a new nickname. No ‘icyhot asshole’ or ‘half-n-half bastard’ today?” he asks, coming up to peer over the countertop and see what Bakugou’s got cooking in his skillets.

Bacon, eggs, sausage, shredded potatoes, pancakes...yeah, total American breakfast.

“I’m feeling extra nice today, don’t get used to it,” Bakugou says as he flips each of the pancakes expertly in their pan. They’re perfectly golden brown on the side that had just been cooking, and he’s poured them in such precise discs that Shouto thinks they belong in a food magazine.

“I’ll take what I can get,” Shouto says with a small, easy smile. He likes this, likes when he and Bakugou can talk like actual people—friends— without arguing about stupid things.

Bakugou looks up for just long enough to catch Shouto’s smile, then averts his gaze almost immediately and his face reddens considerably.

Must be the heat from the stove, Shouto thinks as he comes around the raised counter and goes over to the fridge. He pulls the door open wide, looking for some cartons of his strawberry yogurt drink.

“Oi, who the hell said you could come in here while I’m cooking, asshole?” Bakugou asks over his shoulder, glaring at Shouto once again.

“I’m not even in your vicinity,” Shouto says with his head still buried in the fridge, the hand not holding his blanket cape closed shoving aside various bottled drinks and leftover containers belonging to his classmates. He lets out a small noise of success when he spots his stash of drinks, all labeled “Todoroki’s—Do Not Touch <3” in Uraraka’s bubbly handwriting, and grabs one. When he closes the fridge, he looks up to see Bakugou plating his breakfast.

Shouto spots two plates on the counter next to the stove, and he tilts his head in confusion. “Who’s the second plate for?” he asks as he pokes the little plastic straw through the foil-covered hole on his drink carton. “Is Kirishima coming down to join you?” 

Bakugou pauses, a spatula full of eggs halfway to the plate. “No, Shitty Hair is still sleeping,” he says, neither elaborating nor sparing Shouto a glance.

The blond continues to move food from the stove to the plates, distributing even portions between the two. Shouto just stands there and watches, sipping his yogurt drink and hoping Bakugou will clear up this mystery by explaining himself.

Bakugou digs through the drawer where the eating utensils are stored, pulling out a pair of forks and knives instead of chopsticks and setting them atop the plates. He picks up one plate in each hand and steps up to Shouto. Shouto watches as Bakugou takes a deep breath before lifting his head and staring resolutely up at Shouto.

“Here,” Bakugou says, holding out one of the plates to Shouto. “You’re going to see your mom or some shit today, right? You should eat something that’s not total ass crap before you go.”

Shouto stares wide-eyed at the offered plate, some strawberry yogurt dribbling out of the tip of the straw and down his bottom lip when his mouth opens in surprise.

“Well? You gonna take it or what, dickhead? I’m not gonna fucking stand here all day holding it for you,” Bakugou prompts, thrusting the plate forward. Shouto is forced to let go of his blanket to take the plate before his breakfast spills all over the floor. Instead, his blanket takes the hit, sliding off his shoulders and pooling around his feet on the floor.

“Holy shit, you’re a fucking disaster,” Bakugou sighs, leaning down to pick up Shouto’s blanket while still expertly holding his own plate without dropping a single morsel of food. 

Shouto hastily uses his sleeve to wipe away the mess on his mouth, both of his hands occupied at the moment, then extends his arm out to Bakugou. Bakugou drapes the blanket over Shouto’s arm and shoves his way past the taller boy. He claims one of the tables closest to the kitchen, plopping down with an annoyed-sounding huff and digging into his breakfast without much ceremony after muttering a small, "itadakimasu."

Shouto stands there in the kitchen for a few moments, staring down at the plate heaped high with food in his hand. He bites the inside of his lip and his gaze shifts to Bakugou—well, Bakugou’s back, since the blond has chosen to sit facing away from Shouto. 

What has Shouto ever done to deserve to be in Bakugou’s good graces? He almost doesn’t know how to reconcile this within himself, the worthiness it takes to be acknowledged by Bakugou.

Shouto blows out a shaky breath, feeling his heart pounding in his chest.

He quietly pads over to the table Bakugou has chosen for himself, taking the seat directly across from the prickly boy. He gently sets his plate down and readjusts his blanket around his shoulders before he sits down.

Bakugou pauses with his fork halfway to his mouth, cheek puffed out as he stops chewing just to watch Shouto with an unreadable expression.

“I hope you don’t mind my company,” Shouto says quietly, glancing up at Bakugou through his bi-colored bangs.

Bakugou watches him before letting out a sigh through his nose and finishes chewing what's in his mouth. “Do what you want, I don't fucking care,” he says dismissively before shoving another forkful of food into his mouth. 

The two eat in silence after that. It isn't an uncomfortable silence, just a little tense. Not because of any negative feelings shared between the two of them, but because Shouto feels like he should say something but he doesn't know what. 

There are a lot of things he wants to say to Bakugou, namely to thank him for cooking breakfast—which is delicious, as expected from the perfectionist boy—but…ever since last week, when Shouto was in the deepest part of his depression downswing, Bakugou had been…extremely…present? Like, everywhere Shouto would turn, the other boy was there, even if they weren't directly engaging with each other. 

Shouto doesn't know if Bakugou truly is around more, or if he's just…more aware of him now. Either one is a vexing concept to Shouto.

"Thank you, Bakugou," Shouto finally says, moving his eggs around the plate with his fork. "I really appreciate you doing this for me."

Bakugou makes an indecipherable noise in response, something that's a mix of a grunt and a whine. "Yeah, yeah, don't get used to it. I just had to cook all this shit before it fuckin' expired."

Shouto cracks a smile, somehow finding Bakugou’s deflection of his gratitude…endearing. "Right…" he says, agreeing aloud but Bakugou doesn't have him entirely convinced. 

They finish their breakfast without any more words exchanged, and Shouto drops his blanket around Bakugou’s shoulders when he leaves the room to head for the elevators. He smiles to himself when Bakugou lets out an indignant yell and throws the blanket back at Shouto, missing him by a mile.

.

Shouto knocks softly before he opens the door to his mother's room.

"Oh, Shouto!" Rei greets her son, setting down her watering can and coming over to him as he closes the door behind him. 

“Hi, okaasan,” Shouto says, hesitating before slowly reaching out and pulling his mother into a hug. Rei’s arms come up under his armpits and rest on his back, and she places her head against his shoulder. 

“You’ve grown again, haven’t you?” Rei asks, pulling away to look up at Shouto’s face. She places a gentle hand against his right cheek, her thumb rubbing the soft patch of skin beneath his eye.

“Maybe another centimeter…” Shouto says quietly, infinitesimally leaning into his mother’s touch.

“Well, come and sit, your sister brought me some green tea cookies yesterday, you should have some,” Rei says, leading Shouto to sit on one of the chairs by the window. 

What a blessed day, Shouto thinks, to have Bakugou’s cooking in the morning and Fuyumi’s baked goods now. The one thing he misses the most from home is his sister’s cooking, which he’s been deprived of since living in the dorms.

“I might sneak some back with me to the dorms,” Shouto says as he takes a seat. Rei sits on her bed across from Shouto, retrieving a large box full of cookies from her side table. She holds the box out to Shouto and he takes it gratefully, gently opening the lid and taking out a few cookies to nibble on.

“How is neesan?” he asks quietly, holding one of the cookies close to his mouth but not taking a bite just yet. “I haven’t spoken to her much this week.”

And that’s definitely an understatement, Shouto mentally chides himself. Not only has he not spoken to either of his siblings in over a week, he hasn’t even seen his mother in two weeks.

He doesn’t want her to know that the reason he skipped out last week is because he had no will to live.

“She’s doing fine,” Rei says with a light smile. “She tells me her class is going on a field trip to the aquarium next week. Her students are thrilled.”

“That does sound fun,” Shouto agrees with a nod, nibbling at the cookie. He still doesn’t make eye contact with his mother. “And Natsu-nii? How is he?”

“Natsu is fine, too,” Rei answers, her smile fading somewhat. “He came to see me a few days ago after his midterms were finished.”

Shouto hums, not really knowing what else to say at the moment. He retreats into himself a little, his mind berating him. 

It’s your fault you haven’t talked to your brother and sister this week. You’re so selfish. You should have at least texted them, instead of moping like a miserable little weakling. 

You can’t always expect them to reach out first. 

They don’t even like you that much.

Shouto sighs, shoving the rest of the cookie in his mouth. Maybe if he concentrates on chewing, he can drown out the bad thoughts.

You didn’t even visit your mother. 

You’ve disappointed her yet again.

When Shouto swallows his cookie, it feels like sandpaper in his throat.

“Shouto...is...is something wrong?” Rei asks, breaking the ice that seems to have chilled the room. Shouto finally dares to look up at her and sees the worried expression on her usually serene face.

“N-No, I mean...yeah…no...maybe? I don’t know,” he stumbles over his words in a way that is very uncharacteristic of him. He rubs a hand down his face and sighs. “Okaasan, I...do you ever just...feel...empty? Like you have nothing inside of you, and you exist outside of your own body?”

Rei seems taken aback by his question, which makes Shouto clam up immediately. He hunches over in his chair, crossing his ankles and staring at the floor to avoid making eye contact. “S-Sorry, forget I asked, it’s nothing—” 

“I do, sometimes,” Rei answers softly, interrupting her son’s attempts at backpedaling. “I used to feel it a lot more back when...everything happened. It’s not as bad now.”

Shouto lifts his head just enough to peek at his mother through his dual-colored bangs hanging in front of his eyes.

“My doctors have told me that dissociation—the out-of-body sensation—is a trauma response,” Rei continues in a gentle voice. “In order to protect ourselves, our minds can shut down and force us out, so that we don’t have to face or acknowledge our emotions or...what’s really going on around us.”

Shouto’s breath hitches.

“Have you been feeling this way lately, Shouto?” Rei then asks, serious and soft, with no judgment in her eyes.

Shouto silently nods, begging his eyes to cooperate and not allow his tears to fall.

“Is that why you didn’t come see me last week? And why you haven’t talked with Fuyumi or Natsuo?”

Shouto nods again, sniffing and wiping at his nose with the back of his hand. “I feel like...I don’t know, like...I don’t deserve to? To see you, to talk with neesan and Natsu-nii. I keep having...thoughts…”

“What thoughts?”

God, Shouto shouldn’t be saying any of this. He shouldn’t be saying any of this to his mentally ill mother. What if he triggers her by talking about all these ugly feelings inside of him? What if, by giving these thoughts a voice, they turn out to be true? What if—

“What thoughts are you having, Shouto?” Rei asks more insistently, though her voice is still quiet and calm. Comforting. Soothing in a way that Shouto doesn’t feel like he deserves from her.

“I…”

It’s then that Shouto breaks completely. He drops his uneaten cookies to the floor and hides his face in his hands as he quietly cries, trying not to make a sound because if he does, then his father will hear and—

No.

Endeavor isn’t here. Endeavor is far, far away from here.

It’s just him. Just him and his mother.

His mother.

His mother...who burned him because he looks too much like his father.

His mother, whose life he ruined just by existing.

“Shouto…”

Shouto barely registers Rei coming over to him and pulling him into a hug, his head against her stomach. He just cries and cries and cries, as silently as he can manage, while Rei runs her delicate fingers through his hair in a small attempt at comfort.

“I’m sorry...I’m sorry...I’m so sorry, okaasan…” Shouto chokes out, the words falling out of his mouth faster than he can catch them. “I’m no good...I can’t...I just…”

Rei just holds her son, soothing noises brushing through her lips as she combs her fingers through his hair, rubs her hand up and down his back in a comforting manner. Shouto gasps and heaves as he sobs, and eventually, he runs out of tears to shed.

When he’s quieted down, Rei only pulls away enough that she can tilt Shouto’s head up to look him in the eye. But he averts his gaze, won’t meet her eyes. Her thumb catches some of the stray tears crawling down his cheek. 

“I’m sorry, okaasan,” he whispers, his voice breathless and shaky. “Sometimes, it’s...everything is just too much and I…”

Rei waits patiently for him to continue.

“I just...want to die…” Shouto says so quietly he isn’t sure if he actually spoke at all. But his mother pulling him into another hug is all the confirmation he needs that she has heard him loud and clear.

“Shouto...do you have anyone you can talk to about these feelings? A friend, a teacher, a counselor? Someone?” Rei asks. Shouto shakes his head, buries his face in the soft material of her sweater vest.

But that’s a lie, Shouto thinks. He does have people he can talk to. Midoriya, Yaoyorozu, Iida, Uraraka, Kirishima…

Bakugou.

“I really worried all my friends last week,” Shouto says, his voice muffled by Rei’s sweater vest. “I...wasn’t myself and I...I tried to hurt myself. I did hurt myself,” he admits, feeling the guilt and shame bleed into his veins once again, as if they had never really left in the first place.

Rei hums to assure him that she’s listening, and Shouto is grateful for his mother’s supportive presence, even if she isn’t saying anything at the moment. He knows this must be a lot for her, to hear that one of her children feels so awful about himself to want to…

“I think you should see someone, Shouto. A professional. They can help you,” Rei says, and Shouto can hear the quiet confidence in her words. Words spoken from experience. Who would know about this kind of thing better than her, after all?

Shouto nods wordlessly, pulling back and finally looking at his mother. She smiles softly down at him, and tucks some of his disheveled hair away from his face. “Is it scary?” he asks, already feeling the trepidation at the possibility of sharing his innermost thoughts and feelings with a complete stranger.

Rei nods slowly, her smile fading somewhat. “Yes. It can be scary, at first. And painful. Your emotions will be all over the place for a while. But…” she pauses, placing both her hands on Shouto’s cheeks to make sure she has his full attention. “Talking about this, working through it with someone who is trained to help people like you and me...it’s an important step to take so you can heal.”

“Heal…” Shouto echoes, averting his gaze. 

“You have so much pain inside your heart. I see it, Shouto. I see it in you, in Fuyumi, in Natsuo. I see it in myself every time I look in the mirror. But you can move past it. You can learn to cope with it in healthy ways. You’re strong...you’re too strong to give up.” Rei slowly drops her hands from Shouto’s face, only to take his hands that have been tightly wound in his lap. “I know you can do this.”

Shouto nods hesitantly, unclenching his fingers and letting his mother twine hers in his. His hands ache, his right hand covered in frost and his left hot and sweaty.

But he holds onto Rei’s hands like his life depends on it, and looks her in the eye once more.

“What do I need to do?”

.

Shouto returns to the dorms much later than he anticipates. After talking at length with his mother about his depressive episode from a week ago and the intrusive thoughts that plague both his waking and his sleeping hours, they’ve come up with a tentative plan. Shouto is to speak to Aizawa-sensei about seeing a UA-employed counselor. He has a soft deadline of sorts to complete this task—Rei had told him that she hopes he'll talk to his homeroom teacher by the time he comes to see her next week.

Shouto sighs, slipping his shoes off by the front door of the dorm building. He passes by some of his classmates on his way to the elevators, actually stopping to say a quick hello to Jirou and Kaminari who are sitting on the couches with their guitars. Tokoyami is also in the common area, at a table reading a book while Dark Shadow flits around and keeps watching for something outside. He waves to them both before he makes it to the elevator. 

When he gets inside, he punches the button for the fourth floor.

For some reason, Shouto feels an unwavering need to see Bakugou. 

The elevator pings and the doors slide open, and Shouto marches to Bakugou’s door with a grim but determined expression. 

When he knocks on Bakugou’s door, his knocking is quiet and concise with only three raps of his knuckles on the door.

It takes a minute, but Bakugou eventually opens the door and scowls at Shouto. "What," he says, not even a question. 

"Can I come in?" Shouto asks almost shyly, opening his bag and pulling out a small plastic container of Fuyumi's cookies his mother had given him to bring back. "I...have these for you."

To Shouto’s surprise, Bakugou doesn't turn him away and actually backs up into the room, opening his door wider to allow Shouto passage. "What, you wanted to pay me back for cooking you breakfast this morning?"

Shouto blinks, looking at Bakugou as if the blond had just grown another head. Did...did he just admit to cooking Shouto breakfast?

"Sort of," Shouto says quickly, opening the container and pulling out a cookie. "My sister made these, and I remember how much you liked her cooking when...uh, when you and Midoriya came over for dinner at my house that one time…"

"What is it?" Bakugou asks, taking the cookie from Shouto and examining it closely, even sniffing it to determine its ingredients. 

"Green tea cookie," Shouto says, watching Bakugou take a bite. Shouto smiles when Bakugou’s expression changes to something between being pleased and impressed, and the boy shoves the rest of the cookie in his mouth. 

"Not bad," Bakugou says, looking at the crumbs stuck to his palm before looking around the room for something to wipe them off with. He spots a small towel sitting at the top of his gym bag by the bed, going to grab it and wipe his hand with it. "Might have to snag the recipe from her."

"I can text her and ask for it," Shouto offers, waiting until Bakugou is finished cleaning his hands before handing the closed container to him. "And...you can have the rest of these. I brought them for you, specifically."

Bakugou looks surprised for about a split second before he smirks, taking the container. "You…sure you don’t want any for yourself? Seems fucking stupid to give them all to me when your sister made them."

Shouto can feel his face heating up and he has to keep a lid on his Quirk before he lights himself on fire. Since when has his Quirk been so hard to control? And for that matter, Bakugou hasn’t said anything remotely close to embarrassing. Why is Shouto feeling so flustered?

"It’s okay, I had plenty while I was with my mother," Shouto says, clenching his hands into fists now that he doesn't have the cookie container to fiddle with. "I…also just…wanted to see you, I guess."

"What the fuck? Why?" Bakugou says, and to Shouto’s shock, he doesn't sound angry at all. Just…confused. 

About as confused as Shouto feels at the moment. 

“I don’t know…maybe…” Shouto rubs his hand over his face, slicking his hair back for just a moment before it falls back into his face and covers most of his vision. “I…had a talk with my mother…about, you know, last week.”

Bakugou seems to stop breathing as soon as Shouto mentions last week, eyeing the half-n-half boy with trepidation.

“Um…can I…sit?” Shouto asks, curling his toes against the rug.

“…Sure,” Bakugou replies hesitantly, gesturing in the general direction of the bed. He himself goes over to his desk, setting the cookie container next to an organized stack of textbooks and notebooks. He pulls his chair out and sits down, straddling the seat and propping his arms on the seatback. Finally, he rests his chin on his arms and watches Shouto curiously.

Shouto just sits on the floor, cross-legged, tucking his feet under himself as far as he can.

“You could sit on the bed, you fucking dingus,” Bakugou says. “It’s not like you haven’t been in it before.”

It takes about a millisecond before both boys register what had just come out of Bakugou’s mouth, and both their faces turn red as tomatoes at the implications.

“Uh…anyway,” Shouto clears his throat, and sets his hands in his lap, joining his fingers and twiddling his thumbs in his nervousness. “I…I don’t know why I wanted to tell you specifically all of this, but I felt like you deserved to know since. Well. You helped me so much, when I needed it the most. Which I still can’t thank you enough for, by the way,” Shouto says, looking up at Bakugou and offering him a tiny but grateful smile.

Bakugou squints his eyes at Shouto before he looks away, cheeks still adorably red. He scratches at the back of his neck. “Tch…whatever, no need to thank me. Literally anyone else would have done the same thing if they were the ones watching you jump off your fucking balcony.”

Shouto’s smile turns a little sad, then, and he looks down at the floor. “I’m…sorry. That must have been frightening to deal with.”

A long silence settles between them, then, a silence that weighs heavily in the air with all the things unspoken between them.

“What I wanted to say…” Shouto begins, buckling under the pressure of the silence, “is that…my mother made me promise to talk to Aizawa-sensei about seeing a therapist. One here at school.”

Bakugou watches him warily, raising an eyebrow in question.

“And, uh,” Shouto swallows before continuing, “I…was hoping you could…come with me to talk to him? Since you were there when I jumped.”

The request takes Bakugou by surprise, if his openly shocked expression is anything to go by. Shouto doesn’t think he’s ever seen the boy’s eyes so wide.

“Sorry, I know it’s a lot to ask—” Shouto says, but his words get cut off by Bakugou’s somewhat indignant response.

“Don’t you have other friends that can go with you for ‘moral support’ or whatever shit this is about? I’m sure fucking Deku would be thrilled to help you, since he has such a bleeding heart for every person on the goddamn planet.”

“That’s not the point,” Shouto says, taking a deep breath to speak again before being cut off by Bakugou once more.

“Then what about Four Eyes? He’s always tryin’ to take responsibility as class prez or whatever, or fuck, even Round Face, she’s so fucking happy and bubbly all the time—she’d be good for that. Or, like, Ponytail? What about her? Aren’t you bougie BFFs or some shit?” Bakugou sounds borderline hysteric at this point, listing off Shouto’s other friends as people much better suited for this task than himself.

But…

“But they’re not you,” Shouto says simply, staring at Bakugou with nothing but sincerity in his eyes, his expression. “I want you to go with me, Bakugou. No one else.”

Bakugou ducks his head behind the back of the chair and breathes out a deep breath through his nose. 

Shouto bites at the inside of his lip. This is a mistake. A very big mistake. Yet he can’t find it in himself to take the words back. He means it—he wants Bakugou there with him when he has possibly one of the most important conversations of his life. “You…if you really don’t want to, then you don’t have to. I’m not going to force you into anything, Bakugou.”

Bakugou tilts his head up just enough to peek at Shouto over the top of his arms. He remains silent, but his expression is thunderous. From what Shouto can see of it, anyway.

“Just…think about it? And let me know what you decide,” Shouto says. He waits a few moments for Bakugou to say something, but when no more words come out of that foul mouth of his, that Shouto for some reason finds endearing, he sighs. He pulls himself up off the floor and adjusts his bag to sit correctly on his shoulders. “Sorry for bothering you. Enjoy the cookies.”

Shouto ignores the snort Bakugou gives him in response, making his way over to the door. He opens it to leave, but pauses, looking back over his shoulder at Bakugou. The blond is still sitting in his chair, glaring daggers at the floor, his eyebrows creased so far down that Shouto’s surprised they don’t permanently stick like that.

Sighing one more time, Shouto exits the room and clicks the door softly closed behind him. He’s tired, and needs to get things ready for school tomorrow, so he heads up to his own room feeling much heavier than he did when he arrived back at the dorms.

.

It isn’t until a couple hours later, as Shouto is laying out his futon for bed, that his phone chimes with an incoming message.

He goes over to his desk and picks up his phone, opening up the text messaging app with a few taps of his thumb. His eyes widen when he sees who the text is from.

“Bakugou?” Shouto says aloud, clicking on the conversation to read the message.

fine, i’ll go with u. but we’re talking to aizawa-sensei after school tomorrow. i’m not letting u put this shit off, got it?

Shouto smiles as he types back a quick response.

got it. thank you, bakugou

yeah, yeah, whatever, shut the fuck up.

see u tomorrow in class

His smile grows a little wider, and Shouto has to hide his mouth behind his hand to keep from letting out a small laugh.

yeah...see you tomorrow

#todobaku #todobaku fic #todoroki shouto #bakugou katsuki #my writing

[angstyaches]

This is a fic request for Shayne of him yelling at maybe Elliot, semi trying to protect Charlie by saying that they are not friends that he’s just being around him to get rid of the demon and that’s it aaaaand Charlie over hears....

After the events of the prompt (and the Ouija board session), while Charlie’s processing what Shayne said to Elliott in light of him leaving town without saying goodbye, as well as his childhood trauma. 

The idea for not being able to get up to turn off the light also came from @mxnsterparty​; I hope it’s alright that I added a little CT twist.

CW: headache, demon whump, medication, non-prescribed meds, anxiety, very brief mentions of near-death experience, platonic comfort

Swallow the World: The Rift

On a normal day, it should have taken about ten seconds for Charlie to make it from his own bed, across the hallway, and into the upstairs bathroom. Today should have been a normal day, too; however, the stab of pain going through his skull, practically blinding him in his left eye, was not normal, even for him.

The walk took closer to ten minutes, by the time he’d caught himself on the walls several times, guided himself around the top of the stairs by the bannister – trying not to imagine himself wobbling and falling down and ending up a broken heap in the front hallway – and stumbled through the bathroom door. The light in the bathroom reflected harshly on the white wall and floor tiles, and the brightness cut even deeper into his retinas than the pain originally had, but even in this state, Charlie knew he needed the light, needed to be able to read a label, if he was about to shove pills in his mouth.

He couldn’t tell if his hands were actively shaking or if he just didn’t have the energy to lift them, but reaching up into the cabinet for his dad’s back pain medication felt like pushing his fingers through a wall of quicksand.

Is this a good idea?

“It’s the only idea,” Charlie slurred out loud. He had felt compelled, the past few days, to speak aloud when communicating with Charlie Two, as though he couldn’t form the sentences properly in his head.

It most definitely is not.

It was easy for Charlie Two to judge; it wasn’t their head that felt like it had been clobbered with a bat. So, Charlie One, the owner of the human body, was going to do as he pleased.

You know this is just a band-aid for the real problem.

Charlie caught glimpse of his own sickly grin in the mirror as he shook two pills out of the plastic container, miraculously getting them in the palm of his hand. 

The real problem, according to Charlie Two, was that Charlie wasn’t letting himself feel. Which, again, was easy for a demon to say to a human, when there was such a giant rift between their respective definitions of feeling. And the key to fixing everything was to remember. Fully remember. Acknowledge.

“It didn’t happen, CT,” Charlie whispered before tossing the pills in his mouth. It was probably the sixtieth time he’d said it by now. 

He turned on the water at the sink and lowered his lips to take a mouthful to swallow them back with. And another few gulps for the road, because he had a feeling that once he made it back to bed, his bones wouldn’t be getting up again for the rest of the night.

The beach didn’t happen. It couldn’t have. The visions he’d had during the Ouija board session had just been hallucinations. Surely, if he’d almost drowned as a child, he wouldn’t have blocked it out of his memory for over ten years. Charlie could remember the freckles on the faces of childhood friends, remember tasting his first strawberry ice cream, remember the sting in his palms from all the times he’d fallen off the monkey bars at the park.

“How could - how could I just - just forget something like that?”

It happened, Charlie. I should have said something sooner, but I thought I was protecting you, by letting you forget.

“You can protect me now by being nice and quiet,” Charlie droned, cradling his head and closing his eyes on the way back out of the bathroom. He bumped his shoulder softly on the door jamb, and almost sent himself stumbling across the landing. He smacked at the wall until he found the light switch again, his vision too pierced through with light to keep his eyes open. The drowsy effect from the pills was already kicking in, it seemed, as the heady warmth of sleep began to gather in his cheeks.

You’re not going to forget about him, either.

Charlie gasped and slid a hand along the wall as his legs decided enough was enough. He sank to his knees, easing his forehead down against the floorboards and letting out a whimper. He hugged his arms around his head to try to block out the hallway light. It was like a giant hand had reached down from the ceiling and was pressing him deeper and deeper into the floor, like a cookie cutter into a slab of impossibly hard dough. 

He weakly twitched his wrist and imagined the light switch clicking to the off position, but he didn’t hear any such click. He peered out from under his arm, flinching back and gasping sharply as the light continued to pain down on him like pins into his eyeballs.

“Why?” he groaned. Why wasn’t his telekinesis working? His jumper had started to slide up his back because of the angle he’d positioned himself in, and the cold was rapidly settling into his skin and bones. He couldn’t bare to uncover his face again to fix it, so he just began to shudder helplessly while he winced at the pain.

I’m not helping you if you’re going to ignore me.

“Since when is that how this works?” Charlie whined, pulling his arms even more tightly to his head. 

Since we developed this rift, the night of the Ouija board. It’s thrown us off-balance.

“Well, maybe – maybe if – if you told me what happened in the forest,” Charlie muttered, “we wouldn’t have a rift.”

Maybe if you were willing to remember –

Charlie sobbed drily from deep in his core.

Friend? Shayne had said the word like it was something that revolted him. The harshness of it twisted in Charlie’s gut, even now. You think I’m stupid, that I go around letting myself get attached to people?

“Just…” Charlie whimpered towards the floorboards, his body not finding enough moisture to form any actual tears. “Just turn the light off, CT.”

You seriously think I’d be anywhere near this god-damned place if I didn’t have to be? If there was anybody else who would do it?

“CT…”

You think I’d actually make friends with someone like Charlie? I don’t have friends, Elliott, I have a fucking job.

“Turn the light off, please,” Charlie cried. His fingers grabbed so violently at his head that he felt his nails dig into his scalp, clumps of hair being crushed and tugged. He was about ready to scoop his own skull clean with a spoon, just to be rid of the agony. Light flashed behind his eyelids, penetrating every layer of him, it seemed. 

“If you won’t help me now,” he asked, “and - and you couldn’t stop my best friend from leaving, what the hell good are you?”

You think I meant for him to leave? You think I knew that night in the forest would be the last we saw of him?

“That you saw of him,” Charlie whimpered. “The last I saw of him was...”

Shayne had been trying so hard not to show his pain as he’d left the Mulberry house during the Ouija board session, but Charlie knew it was there. And still, still, the very last words Charlie spoke to him were to tell him to leave.

That was what he was left with; hollow looks, horrible words, and the terrible bloody pain that felt like it was splitting the side of his head open –

A slight click made him open his eyes a crack. He made a small gap between his arm and the floorboards, and sighed when he saw that the landing was in darkness.

“Thank you,” he muttered, tucking his head away again.

Aren’t we going back to bed?

“Can’t,” Charlie mumbled, his back arching slightly at a sharp draft that ran like nails over his back. His muscles didn’t feel like his own. They felt like a hundred splints set over his bones, locking him in place. It was almost like waking up in a state of sleep paralysis, but he hadn’t been to sleep yet.

Charlie.

Charlie?

___

He didn’t know how many times he heard Charlie Two try to stir him, or how long he had to remain on the cold floor before he next felt something warm. Hands, scrubbing at his sides, trying to loosen him. The voice saying his name became warm too, and CT began to retreat into silence again.

“Charlie Bear,” the new voice whispered, “say something to me, please.”

“R-R-R-” His jaw was so stiff that he could barely form the sounds, could barely force his neck to turn. “Rin, how - how did you -?”

“I got your text,” she said softly, sliding her hands up and down his back as though to push out the tension. “You picked a hell of a spot to fall down in a heap, Charlie Bear. It’s freezing out here.”

Charlie hummed in agreement, too exhausted to tell her that he hadn’t sent a text, hadn’t been able to move an inch for God knows how long. 

You’re welcome. You were able to use my phone? Charlie leaned against Rin as she tugged him up from the floor, pulling an arm around her shoulder. At least he could once again communicate with CT inside his head, which was aching considerably less. His thoughts were less scattered too, less pinched, as though something had clicked into place.

“Charlie?” Rin squeaked, her eyes widening behind her glasses.

He leaned one hand against the wall again, afraid he was going to drop right down at Rin’s feet. Everything was spinning, and his chest hurt, and he hadn’t even realised he’d started to cry.

“Oh, god, okay,” Rin said, flapping about him and trying to direct him towards his room. 

“No; no light,” he managed to mumble as he saw her reach for the switch. He could just about make out the shape of the bed with the light trickling up from the downstairs hallway, and that was good enough for him.

Her smile was sad and concerned as she tilted her head, and Charlie could hear everything from the way each line tentatively curved on her face. 

“Rin,” he whined. “Thank you, for - for coming over.”

“Hey, shut up with that,” she half-laughed. 

Rin sat with her back against the wall and beckoned for Charlie to lay his head down in her lap. He groaned, almost overwhelmed with gratitude, as her hand came down to gently rest on top of his head, palm smoothing over his hair. Her fingers didn’t instantly trace down over his left brow, like Shayne’s always did, and he swallowed a lump in his throat as he reached up to guide her fingers downwards.

“This is where it hurts?”

“Yeah,” he choked out. “Feels like something’s burrowing out of me.”

Rin sighed as she began to work small, gentle circles over the side of his forehead.

“Sorry if I pulled you away from studying,” he murmured.

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” she chuckled softly. “I’ve basically burnt myself out. I’m not glad you’re in pain or anything, but I am glad to have a distraction. Have you managed to get anything done?”

“No,” he said, terror lurking in the pit of his stomach at the thought of the looming exams. “I think being able to focus on schoolwork would actually be a distraction for me.”

“I’ll help you tomorrow, if you’re feeling better,” Rin offered. “If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s study tactics. Might as well put it to use.”

“Thanks.”

Silence drifted down onto the sheets in the darkness, broken only by their breathing, and a slight thud as Rin let her head roll back gently against the wall. The creak of a bedspring as Charlie pulled his legs up tighter to his torso. And finally, a hitched breath as all of the swirling blackness in his chest solidified, forming a dull ache in his chest rather than a sharp one.

“Hey,” Rin whispered, looking down and sweeping his hair back from his forehead. “You’re okay, Charlie Bear.”

“No, I’m – I’m not. He said…” Charlie gulped back a sob, curling his hands into fists and pulling them hard against his chest. He had told Rin the story days ago, after he’d recovered from his fainting spell, but he’d told it robotically, casually, as though he’d been describing a mediocre movie he’d just seen. “I – I almost drowned, Rin, I almost died.”

Rin smoothed the palm of her hand down the back of Charlie’s head. “I’m very glad you didn’t,” she said softly, though anything she said in that moment probably wouldn’t have mattered. She just continued to stroke his head and gently hold his shoulder as he cried. He cried like a floodgate had been opened, like the crying had always been going to happen.

“He…” Charlie began to fight the sobs. “He said he was never even my friend, Rin. He said being around me was just a job he had to do.”

“That was why you were both acting weird that night,” Rin realised.

“And in the forest, Charlie Two… I, we, we left him,” he whispered, the memory of the interaction soft and dark, but unnervingly familiar, in his head now that things had settled down. “He was asking these questions, and – and I didn’t realise he was asking because he was thinking of leaving. If I’d just listened properly, Rin, maybe he wouldn’t have…”

As the words trailed off, Rin let out a sigh. “Maybe. Maybe it would have made a difference, but maybe it wouldn’t have.  I’m sure whatever Shayne’s said or done, it was to protect you.”

Charlie sniffled, rubbing the end of a sleeve to the end of his nose. “You really think that?”

“Well, I – okay, so I’m not sure…” Rin cleared her throat. “I used to think I had a pretty good handle on people, you know? But recently, it’s like… it’s like I’ve just found out I’m a different species to everyone else.”

“I can understand that,” Charlie said, a soft laugh bubbling up through the tears. The dry sound quickly tapered into a whine as the pressure in his head pulsated.

“I guess you can, Charlie Bear,” she said, circling her fingertips over his brow again. Her movements were beginning to slow as both of them sank further into the warmth and comfort of just being there in each other’s warmth and company. “Maybe that’s why you’re the only person I can be myself around lately.”

Charlie gave a deep hum of agreement. “Screw Katie,” he whispered. “The girl clearly doesn’t know what the perfect friend looks like, even when she’s right in front of her.”

Rin bent down to kiss the top of his head, smoothing his hair down again where she’d disturbed it with her chin. “Thanks, Charlie.”

He hummed again, bringing his fists to his mouth to cover up a yawn. He couldn’t even remember at what point he’d closed his eyes.

Rin folded up her legs and began to move across the mattress to the edge of the bed. “I should go home and let you rest.”

“Unless…” Charlie slowly sat up a bit, freeing Rin’s legs and rubbing at his head. The tears had dried up, but he was still holding himself the way a wounded animal would, leaning in her direction like he was just seeking heat. “Unless you want to stay? I thought I’d love having the house to myself, but it – it sucks a bit, actually. Especially on nights like this. I don’t really want to be alone.”

“Of course I’ll stay, babe.” Rin leaned across and slipped her arms around his shoulders. She sighed deeply as he lifted one arm to loop around the back of her neck, his face disappearing over her shoulder. “I don’t want to be alone tonight either.”

#sickfic #sickfic boys #demon sickfic #demon whump #charlie #rin #my ocs #platonic comfort #hurt and comfort #headache #emotional whump #platonic caretaker #charlie two #hurt comfort fic

[irrlicht-writes]

in front of windows

Characters: Castiel, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Pairing: Castiel/Dean

Summary: He could still save him. It’s what they did: they fixed things. But they were running out of time. Dean wished they could have more. They were supposed to go on a beach vacation together. Castiel would wear bumblebee-swimshorts and they’d be happy. If they could’ve had more time... maybe he could’ve said it to Castiel’s face then, instead.

A/N: my second coda to yet another episode I have not seen. @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover (I feel so weird tagging people because even when they request it it feels like I’m bothering themmm)

Coda to 15x09 “The Trap”

________________________________

Dean busted through the door, hoping against hope that he wasn’t too late. His breaths came hard and fast and then – he stopped.

Castiel stood in the middle of the room, right in front of the window. He wasn’t facing the door Dean just slammed open and everything was quiet. The room was dark; and Cas obstructed the only light source, illuminating him. That was an angel, right there, amidst the dead, because he killed them all. Dean looked at the ground. Around his feet, there were corpses, slaughtered. It reminded him too much of who he used to be and seeing it now, knowing the cause for it – it hurt.

His friend turned his head to him and Dean still believed he could be saved. Even if he could barely see Castiel in these blue eyes anymore, he still believed the angel could be saved. He had to. Nobody else believed in it anymore and he wasn’t ready to give up.

“Dean”, Castiel said.

He looked around the room and there was no remorse in his voice.

“I believe I got them all. We should leave now.”

Dean couldn’t say anything, and he also couldn’t move when Castiel came his way. That was his friend. These lifeless blue eyes were his friend. It was his fault. Everything was his fault and he didn’t know how to fix it. He lost Castiel more and more every breathing moment and he feared the day nothing would be left of him. His hand was shaking and he was still grabbing the doorknob. He didn’t know what to do.

He knew.

“Dean”, Castiel said again and reached out to his hand, removing it gently from the door. Castiel was still there, in these rare moments. Dean swallowed down, hard, and resisted the urge to hug his friend. He didn’t have the right; he’d never have the right again.

“Are... are you okay?” He asked instead.

Castiel nodded.

“I am now.”

Yes... he’d be fine now, after killing all these people. It didn’t matter if they deserved this. It mattered that there was no remorse in Castiel’s heart after the act. Castiel left the room and Dean, having his head hung low, followed him. There was nothing else to do.

He mourned every moment he never got to have.

~

“Dean.”

He tried so very hard not to listen. He was fixated on this stupid book-page; it didn’t matter if he had no clue what it said. His hands were shaking and he wished he could have a drink. Hell, he wished he could be drunk all the time these days. But he would never forgive himself for that. Being drunk in possibly the last moments he’d ever get? He shouldn’t even be reading this book, but maybe – just maybe – there was a way to fix it in there. Because they would fix this. That’s what they did.

“Dean!”

Sam tore his book away from him and Dean stared at him angrily. He hated Sam. He hated Sam for his level-headedness. Fuck, he hated Castiel for the same reason. He knew both of them were right, but he didn’t want to hear it.

“What?” He barked at Sam.

“Dean... you know it’s what we got to do.”

That motherfucker even did the puppy-eyes. They had worked so many times, Dean couldn’t even count. But not this time. Not about this.

“What, Sam? We fix this, this is what we gotta do! That is not fixing it!”

Sam shook his head.

“Dean, Cas himself said –“

“Well, fucking Cas can go suck my dick then!”

Sam shut up. Dean stood up and stormed away. He was delaying the impossible, he knew that. But what else was he supposed to do? He couldn’t... he just couldn’t.

He threw himself on his bed and curled up on it. The thought alone made him sick. There had to be a way to fix this. They always managed. They always fixed stuff. So why couldn’t they fix Cas? And why was Sam so ready to just... give up? He thought they were friends. They were all supposed to be brothers! You didn’t just give up on family!

“Dean.”

Dean swallowed the lump in his throat and sat up. “Hey, Cas.”

His friend moved quietly, and then sat down next to him. Dean looked over. It was Cas. It’d always be Cas. He could do this. He could save him. It’d all be alright, and then they’d go take that beach vacation. Castiel would wear swim-shorts with bees on them and they’d play ball on the sand together. Yes. That’s what they’d do, once this nightmare was done with.

“I really wanted to kill Sam when I passed him by.”

Dean didn’t know what to say. “You didn’t, though.” It was barely a whisper.

“No. But it’s getting harder to resist.” Castiel turned his head. “It’s also getting harder to resist killing you.”

He reached out and took Dean’s hand. It was nice. Castiel’s hand was warm, and a solid weight. They should’ve held more hands before.

“I think about it a lot. I could take your hand like this and just... break every finger on it. Bend them backwards, just to hear you scream.”

Dean was paralyzed. He knew these thoughts. But Cas was supposed to be stronger than this. Nothing was supposed to touch him. Castiel raised his other hand and put it on Dean’ cheek. That, too, was nice. They should’ve done that more often.

“I also think about pushing my finger into your eye and pop the eyeball out. I think about putting my fingers in your mouth and rip it open, tearing your jaw off. I think about putting my hand in your chest”, his hand left his face and was now rubbing over his chest, “just to tear your heart out. Breaking every rib you have, pierce your lungs and see the terrified look in your eyes.”

Castiel then straddled his lap, looking down at Dean.

“I think about tearing your arms off, to hear you scream. I think about ripping your legs off and tie them together.”

He held Dean’s face in his hands and pressed their foreheads together.

“I want to do all this, and I want Sam to watch. I want to hurt Sam and I want you to watch, powerless to do anything about it. I want to rip and slice and stab and kill everything. I want to hear you scream, I want to end your lives in the most painful way possible. And I can’t...”

His voice broke and he had clenched his eyes shut. Dean could just stare. He understood. He understood exactly how Cas felt. He would fix this.

“I’m gonna fix this, Cas, you just wait and see.”

Castiel shook his head and something akin to a broken sob escaped him.

“Dean, you can’t. And even if it was possible, I don’t have enough time. You know that. Dean, please. Please. I don’t want this. I don’t want this to become a reality, Dean, please...”

Dean hugged his angel. They were shaking. He knew. Of course he knew. Castiel had been so strong resisting for as long as he did.

“Stay with me tonight”, Dean whispered. He needed Cas to be with him until the end. He didn’t know how he’d cope after his friend was gone.

“I’m afraid I’ll hurt you.”

Castiel’s eyes were big and blue and there was the angel he’d always known. The one that’d been with him for so long; that has died for him. He could never be afraid of this Castiel.

Dean shook his head. “You won’t, angel. You won’t.”

“Your faith in me is astounding.”

“Cas... you’re the only thing I’ve ever had faith in.”

They huddled together and Dean held tight on that trench coat. He didn’t want to sleep, but Cas would watch over him, one last time. He wished they’d had more time. More time to hurt each other again and again; and find each other again and again.

~

The next morning, Cas was still here, watching Dean. He smiled. “Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.”

It was the last time he’d hear these words and it hurt. He searched for Cas’ hand and squeezed it. This couldn’t be happening. Surely, Sam would bust in the room any second and proclaim he’d found a cure. But Sam never came. Castiel kept looking at him with these unwavering eyes. He’d miss those most of all. He scooted closer to Cas and hugged him tight – it was weird while they were laying down, but what did it matter? What did anything matter anymore?

“Let’s go.”

Castiel nodded and Dean’s heart broke.

~

Dean couldn’t let go of Cas’ hand. Sam was standing behind them and he was snivelling. Normally, Dean would tease him for that but – not now. It took everything he had not to break down crying. The monster sat right there, as innocent as a table – the Ma’lak Box.

Castiel was oddly composed but then again; Castiel always did what needed to be done. It didn’t mean that Dean could. He was shaking and Castiel squeezed his hand tighter. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end. It was supposed to end with the three of them together. Him, Sam and Cas. Team Free Will.

Sam put a hand on Cas’ shoulder. “Cas, I... I’m going to miss you.” That was all? Castiel turned to Sam and hugged him – Dean hated that he let go of his hand for that.

“I’m going to miss you as well, Sam. I hope you can forgive me one day.”

Sam shook his head: “There’s nothing to forgive, Cas.”

Castiel stepped back and looked at Dean. Dean couldn’t return the look. It meant good-bye, and he’d never be ready for that. Castiel’s hand was soft on his back.

“Dean, you know it must be done.”

He stepped forward to the box and stepped inside. Dean didn’t want to look. He wanted to run and when he came back, he wanted everything to be fine. Cas and Sam would be sitting in the library, talking about ancient texts and chastise him for just going out like that.

Castiel was sitting inside the box now and he looked up at Dean, smiling.

“It’s going to be fine.”

He lay down and looked at them again. Dean took a step and put his hand on the lid. If he closed it, that would be it. Castiel would be gone. His hand was shaking and there were un-spilled tears in his eyes. He couldn’t do it. But he couldn’t let Sam help him. It had to be him. This was his box, his angel and his responsibility.

Castiel smiled with warm eyes. Dean wished for more time. He wished for a sudden cure. Anything. He’d gladly give his own soul to whoever would take it if it meant he wouldn’t have to close the lid.

“Sam. Dean. I love you. I love both of you. And I’m so proud to have known you. I’m so glad our paths have crossed and that I was able to stay with you. I want to thank you. For everything you’ve done and for everything you will still do. I want you to know that I’m forever proud of you. Dean”, his tone was softer now, “please. I want you to remember me as me. But could you... do me one small favour?”

Dean just nodded silently. He couldn’t speak. What was there to say? He wiped the tears out of his eyes because this was the last time he’d be able to see Cas. He was smiling.

“Please, Dean, I... I want to see your smile, just one last time. Can you do this for me?”

How could he deny that wish?

So he smiled. Not his cocky, charming grin, no. Castiel wouldn’t want that. Dean couldn’t stop the tears, but he smiled. Castiel smiled back and he was shining. Dean closed the lid and he kept smiling and the very last moment.

He locked the lid and then he broke down.

He didn’t wail. He just cried.

At some point, he told Sam to leave him alone.

Castiel was gone.

Castiel was gone forever.

He wished he wasn’t so much of a fool.

 “I love you, Cas.”

#supernatural #castiel #dean winchester #destiel #moc!cas #ma'lak box #sam winchester #goodbye #irrlicht-writes #writing #fanfiction #dean x castiel #destiel coda #15x09 the trap #spn 15x09 coda

[startingtodayyouareahost]

Shipping Sentence Starters.

Send me a Host Pairing with a sentence and i’ll write a short snip bit. as requested it shall be put into categories. Undercut since it’s long. sorry mobile readers.  I WANNA STAB MY EYEBALLS! SO I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE IT! I STARTED THIS AROUND 9:30 IT’S NOW 11:30

Pairings

Haruhi x Host

Tamaki x Host

Kyoya x Host

Hikaru x Host (minus Kaoru)

Kaoru x Host (minus Hikaru)

Mitsukuni x Host (minus Takashi)

Takashi x Host (minus Mitsukuni)

Genre (if you see a sentence and want a different genre)

Fluff/Romance

Angst/Gore

Smut/Lemon

Family/Pregnancy

Sibling/Platonic

Fluff/ Romance Starters

“ Excuse me but could you not?”

You can’t just kiss me like that and walk away!”

“You! hoodie off! on me! now!”

“It’s a bad idea, me and you.” 

“Wow. you’re beautiful. . .” “I. . you. . . Shut up!”

“Cuddle intervention.” 

“Marry me.”

“I broken my heart so many times i stopped keeping track.”

“If you’re not going to help me then shut up.”

“Hey! feel my shirt it’s boyfriend/girlfriend material.”

“I can’t with you right now.”

“I’m glad i have the ability to say i love you. some people don’t get to say that.”

“How about smiling? You ever do that? Hmm?“

“ i like seeing you smile.”

“It’s so early, please stop.”

“Don’t be mean! I’m just trying to love you!”    

“ hush, i’m trying to kiss you.”  

“  we should get a pet.” 

“It’s hand holding season.”

“Your cheeks are so red; it’s so cute!”

“I’m not letting you forget an umbrella ever again.” “Hey! now we can kiss in the rain.” “No.”

“Hug me; I’m cold and love you.”

“Pajamas and movies sounds really nice.”

“Fuck it. you and i will get married right now and we will go live in a van. they can take everything from me but they wont take you.”

“I don’t know what i’d do without you.” “die probably”

“ i can’t believe i fell in love … like an idiot.

“Skip class today, let’s walk together in the park.”

“When I’m with you I can be myself naturally.” 

“Take my hand.”

”Don’t pull away – Just a little longer.”

Angst/Gore Starters

“ Where do you think you’re going?”

“If liars could catch on fire then you my love, would be walking in hell.”

“Get out of my face before i knock your lights out!”

“Look me in the eye when i’m talking to you!”

“If you cry they’ll hear us.”

“I thought you cared. guess i was wrong.”

“If i had known that when i married you.”

“You’re a monster.”

“You’re a prideful asshole you know that?”

“Ow. that looks painful. tell me how it feels?”

“You’re extremely stubborn for someone your age. you just refuse to die.”

“No. You lose, you die. so pray that next trigger you pull is a blank.”

“Uh, guys, I think I got shot.“

“I suppose by now you’re starting to feel something’s wrong.”

“It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault.”

“Our time is running out.”

“Can you walk?”

“Go! you can lift all this off of me so go!”

“Hurt me all you want. But if you hurt him/her i will kill you.”

“Can you stop thinking about yourself for once?”

“I don’t know how to love you.”

“Just so we’re clear, we will never be meeting again.”

“How are you holding up?” “How does it look like I’m holding up?!”

“Grab the knife!”

“I won’t go down without a fight!” “I know.”

“Aw. your friend is dead. now it’s just you. think he died cursing your name?”

“ I asked you a question. If you know what’s good for you, you better answer me.”

“If i scream they’ll here and come running. that’s when you capture them” “That’s the plan.” “Then i better not scream.”

“W-what did you just drug me with.”

“I have a lot of viewers right now. they pick how you die.”

Family Starters

“What do you mean you’re pregnant?”

“Babe i love you. but you’re so tiny and your belly is huge!”

“Who knew you would turn soft after becoming a father/mother.”

You heard them. my daughter/son said no.”

“You’re such a pushover when it cokes to your daughter/son.”

“Excuse me? do you kiss your mother/father with that mouth!?”

“After 5 am. their your child.”

“We’re. . .  wrestling baby!”

“Grab the blanket and come sit with me while i finish up.”

“Don’t touch my daughter/son again!”

“Mommy/daddy will make it better.”

“There there little one. i got you.”

“Just because you weren't allowed to cry as a child doesn't mean your own daughter/son has to!”

“Wait! I got a flashlight! Wait!”

“Adoption huh? you’re interested in that?”

“You locked your sibling where!?”

“I never cared if you say your a boy/girl you’re still my baby either way.”

“You want another sibling. . . ask your dad/mom”

“How to you keep getting hurt?! no really is this your talent!?”

“Never, ever! Start a fight. But you better finish it”

“I can’t wait to meet you.”

“are you sure i can hold them? they wont break?”

“I’m not ready for this. i don’t know if i can do this.”

“When something goes wrong i’m here to help! That’s my job as you Mom/Dad! to bail you out when you get in over your head! I want your first thought to be to come get me not think that i’ll kill you!”

“huh? . . .yeah you can sleep with me.”

“Guess neither of us are sleeping tonight. . .huh.”

“I’m so proud of you.”

“No. I’m spending time with my family. It can wait.”

“You just took a bath! how??? when did you???? how did you find mud! it’s not even raining!”

“Well. . .um, do you guys need anything? a snack? condoms?”

Smut Starters

“ I think we should. . .  order in tonight.”

“I know how to shut you up.”

“I’m not just a pair of legs you know.”

“Tonight i’m going to pound you so hard you’re not going to walk in the morning.”

“On your knees.”

“I bought you something.”

“I want you to scream my name”

“Wait, wait, wait! You want to do it here?

“Ouch, that kind of hurts.”

“S-slow down!”

“Tell me what feels good.”

“You want me so bad don’t you.”

“Ah, that feels good…”

“I bet I’m strong enough to pick you up.”

“Touch me. I don’t care how. I just need to feel something right now…”

“Bite me.” “Where?”

“We’re in a car!” “We are in a car. ;)”

“What’s your rush?”

“A simple kiss turned into a bit more. . .”

“Just where exactly do you think you’re going to put that thing?”

“The cuffs stay on, until I say otherwise.”

“All I need is five minutes and two fingers.”

“There’s nothing good on tv tonight.” “Does that mean we can have sex then?”

“Make it rougher.”

“Isn’t the thrill of getting caught half of the fun?”

“Whoever screams the loudest loses.”  

“Can you help me take care of this boner?” “Take care of it yourself!” “Well, it’s your fault it’s there in the first place!”

“I want you to watch me when I fuck you.”   

“I got a collar with your name on it.” “You got me a what?”

“breed me.”

Misc Starters

“I think i just heard a noise downstairs. What should we do?”

“Smile for daddy”

“Where do you go late at night?”

“Why. . . are you so morbid?”

“Well i went to church.” “you went to church!?”

“You look like a hot topic reject.”

“Kids, grab your shit we’re leaving!”

“All I do is drink coffee and say bad words.”  

“If I die, I’m haunting you first.” “ok. fair.”

“YOU SAID TO BE HONEST STOP HITTING ME! “

“I’m too sober for this.” “You don’t even drink.” “I’m going to start.” “No.”

“Don’t bite me, that’s rude.” 

“None of us will ever really know our fathers”

“What the hell are you doing on the bathroom floor at 3 in the morning?”

“you have a very different definition of fun” 

“ i’m a simple person. i see a cool rock , i pick it up.”

“Wow i wanna stab my eyes after this” 

“I’m being gay with you. Homo intended, dammit.”  

“You need a makeover. Like, yesterday.”

"You know what would make me happy...IF YOU WENT TO FUCKING SLEEP."

“Do you think you could bribe with me food, and I would forgive you that easily?” “Yes.” “…..fair enough. I accept your apology.”

“All this and heaven too.”

“Hey guys, I’m here and I’m ready to bitch.”

“I’m wearing my boots with shorts and you can kiss my ass.”

“Alright. i’m gonna cry.”

“Success is more important than human contact and love and hugs and…“ “…is that why you’re crying?”

“If you start singing i will put you on mute.”

“Blocked.” “You can’t block me in real life!”

*Host walks into music room* Everyone here is straight! *awkward silence.* *another host* “Who here is straight??”

“Alright. . . who’s gonna die first because one of you will die.”

#ohshc writing prompt