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paradoxolotl · 2 years

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Faraway Inked I posted to Twitter forever ago ~

Abram was making coffee when Andrew wandered out, bleary eyed and scowling at the sun filtering in through the blinds. He shambled up to Abram and wrapped his arms around his waist, burying his face in the fabric between his shoulders.

“Morning, handsome.”

“It’s too fucking early,” Andrew complained, his voice muffled.

Abram hummed, reaching back to thread his fingers through Andrew’s soft fluffy hair. Andrew rubbed his nose along his spine, almost as if he was trying to get inside Abram’s skin, letting out a quiet, content sigh.

“It’s not easier,” he said.

Kevin eyed him over the mouth of the bottle, frown pressing into his mouth. “What?”

There was a knot in his throat made from terrible honesty, and it took a moment to work it free. Slowly, Andrew ran his thumb along the edge of the label, picking at the peeling corner. “Being straight,” he clarified. Before, he had never cared for whatever bullshit Kevin tried to convince himself of, but now the words were a thorn in his brain, burrowing deeper by the day. Now, he pinned Kevin with a hard look. “Trust me when I tell you that pushing away someone good for you doesn’t work.”

“I’m not-“ Kevin tried, but Andrew held up a hand, cutting him off.

“Drown yourself in booze, kill yourself on the court, I don’t care. But I won’t watch you continue to sabotage something real.” Placing his beer firmly on the table, Andrew ran his thumb across his bottom lip, picturing blue and red and warmth and home. “Don’t waste time you don’t have just because you’re scared, Kevin. It’s not worth it.”

“You look very handsome,” Abram said, unable to keep the smile off of his face.

Andrew twirled them around, the low sound of the music washing over them. “That’s slander,” he said softly, eyes alight with laughter. “I guess it is always the husband.”

Chuckling, Abram leaned down to brush a kiss against Andrew’s cheek. “You are glowing, my love. Marriage suits you.”

“I want a divorce,” Andrew said, pulling Abram closer. “I cannot be with someone who tells such horrible lies.”

“Shouldn’t have married a liar then. But you, Andrew,” Abram whispered, pressing kisses wherever he could reach, “are my most beautiful truth.”

“Stop being a pest,” Andrew said, giving his curls a quick tug as he fell into his space beside him.

Abram melted against his side, passing him the rest of the stolen cookies and tugging Andrew’s thigh over his own. The position was familiar and comforting, warmth from Abram soaking into Andrew. He offered a cookie to him, but Abram only wrinkled his nose. Waving the cookie in his face, Andrew waited until Abram finally took a bite. The glare he received was half hearted at best, and Andrew shoved the rest of it in his mouth to stop the smirk pulling at his lips.

“Excuse me,” Allison’s voice cut through the bubble Andrew had created around himself. She pointed a candy red nail between the two of them. “What the fuck is this?”

Andrew ate another cookie. Abram frowned and tugged at a loose thread in one of the rips in Andrew’s jeans. Neither felt like answering her, feeling the answer was rather obvious.

When she opened her mouth again, Abram turned to where Aaron was sitting, an exasperated but amused look on his face. “How are my nieces?” Abram asked.

“The size of lemons,” Aaron said, rolling his eyes. “And still managing to be a pain.”

Andrew snorted. “Still can’t do meat?”

“I have to air out the entire house if I cook any,” Aaron grumbled. “I’m just going to become a vegetarian.”

“I’ll send you some recipes,” Abram promised.

#aftg #all for the game #the foxhole court #the raven king #the kings men #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil #para's fics #aftg fic wip #aaron minyard #aftg fanfiction #kevin day #aftg fanfic #the foxes #inked truths #twinyards

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kariachi · 2 years

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First part for the day! I think I’ve figured out the order for this chunk! Which, thank fuck because I was struggling until like twenty minutes ago.

Schadenfreude in action.

“Fucking motherfuck bitch!” Snickering, Gar nuzzled Kevin’s throat.

“Hey, you got further this time.”

“I hate you and everything you stand for.” Was it wrong? That he was enjoying watching the love of his life struggle? But then he supposed all was fair in love and video games. Either way, he’d been a good person and was somehow keeping on top of his classes, so really he deserved the simple pleasure of sitting there half-draped over Kevin’s shoulders and watching him fail at something.

“Love you too.” Kevin huffed as he restarted the level.

“Why did I let you talk me into this,” he grumbled. “I don’t do platformers, I’ve never done platformers, but no, you say ‘try the game’ and here I fucking am.”

“Consider, you love me back.”

“Lies and slander, I’m using you for the sex and nothing more.”

As if on cue, he misjudged a jump and fell into a pit of spikes.

Again.

“I’m hacking this game.”

“No, you’re not.” Gar turned his drape into a hug for a long moment. “You just need some practice is all.” Huffing again, Kevin let his head fall back towards Gar’s shoulder.

“What I need, is to be playing a different game. This is just, aggravating.” Oh. Well then- With a little sigh, Gar pressed a kiss to his throat.

“Rather play something co-op with me instead?” It was one thing to find amusement in some inconsequential struggling, but if he genuinely wasn’t enjoying the challenge… He couldn’t have with it.

“Please. Anything.”

“Oh no,” he said, pulling away with another quick kiss, “I chose this one, it’s your turn.” As Kevin hummed in consideration, he went to start up his own laptop.

“I’m thinking Phasmophobia,” Kevin eventually said, “I could go for some catharsis.”

“In the form of getting me killed by a ghost,” Gar replied with a laugh, only for Kevin to turn and grin back at him.

“Exactly.” Gar blew him a raspberry.

“If I die-”

“When you die.”

“If I die, I’m heckling you from beyond the grave.”

“Well yeah, that’s half the fun.” With exaggerated eye rolls and matching grins, each turned his attention to his own device.

“How would you know, Mr Perfect? That’s probably why you can’t do platformers, to balance out your infinite Phasmophobia survivability.”

“We all have our talents. I’m good at Phasmophobia, you’re a functional human being, it all evens out in the end.” Gar gasped like he’d been mortally offended.

“How dare you accuse me of being functional!” Kevin just laughed at him, always one of his favorite sounds.

“In comparison to me? A master.” Chuckling, Gar shook his head. “Anyway, if you want you can stay in the truck, run support for me? Then you don’t have to die.” He was not good enough for this man, he swore it.

“We can try it for a few rounds, but if it’s taking too long with just you inside I’m risking it.”

#fanfic #some chill boys being boys #something just like this

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honestlyzenoouh · 3 years

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So Hold Me Close

This came to me after i read this post, and my brain went “no, you do it because you have small legs and can’t keep up with your bf” and thus this was born.

Now also on AO3

*****

Neil is a little bewildered. He is not at all complaining about this new development in his relationship with Andrew, just a little confused. Andrew has gotten a little, how do you say it delicately; clingy, after they won the championship. The other foxes hasn’t commented on it yet, but they might not have noticed it. Neil has though. By god has Neil noticed it. Luckily, he doesn’t feel smothered by the clinginess, but it seems like he can’t be more than a couple feet away from Andrew now, before his eyebrow furrowed the smallest amount together. And if enough time passes with neither of them moving closer, Andrew shifts the slightest bit towards which ever direction Neil is in.

Okay, the couple of feet is a bit of an overstatement, when in reality it’s 8 feet and 2 inches. Neil knows, he tested it. Kevin was looking on in severe judgement that day, what with Neil moving half an inch away from Andrew, who was sat gaming with Nicky, waiting a few seconds before glancing at his face to see his reaction. The pinch came at 8 feet even, and the shift came at the infamous 8 feet and two inches.

And again, it’s not as if Neil is complaining. It’s always nice to be able to look around, and be able to immediately spot him. Safe even. But that is not what has gotten Neil confused, oh no, the closeness is just on observation. What Neil is having a hard time wrapping his head around is the fact that Andrew has gotten handsy.

But it’s not even the normal handsy he sees from other couple’s PDA. No, there is no hands on his hips, he isn’t casually touching his ass like Matt sometimes does to Dan, nor is he absentmindedly petting his hair like Allison did to Seth. No, he just. Wants to hold his hand. Or his arm. Or on bad days, his sweater sleeve. And Neil doesn’t get it. He doesn’t mind it, really he doesn’t! Andrew always asks first, or just straight up offers his hands to Neil, and Neil somehow always find himself saying yes and taking his hand, even though he doesn’t get his newfound clinginess.

Neil would just have just put it down as a weird form of affection from Andrew. With both of their shitty childhood, general emotional constipation and mistrust of most physical touch, handholding was an acceptable first type of affection. That is, if it wasn’t for the pattern he noticed 3 weeks after the first incident of handholding.

Andrew doesn’t seem to need to hold his hand when they are staying somewhere. Like if they are in the locker room or in any of the foxes room, the 8 feet and 2 inches seems to be enough for Andrew’s clinginess. But whenever they are going somewhere, it literally doesn’t matter where, Andrew hand shoots out after 15 seconds of walking, and he only lets go when they have reached their destination. Sometimes that is. He has started to linger a little, and by now the other foxes has undoubtedly noticed. They still haven’t said anything, though it looks like Allison really wants to sometimes. And it’s not like she can corner Neil alone to get some answers that way, what with the 8 feet two inches.

It is two weeks after the pattern revelation that Neil finally finds the courage to ask Andrew about it. Just because he doesn’t get it, doesn’t mean he dislikes holding hands with Andrew. He’s actually come to really like it, and what if Andrew stops if he points it out? But he needs answers now, and if Nicky’s few comments on the matter only resulted in scowls and grunts, Neil feels a bit reassured. So they are sitting on the roof, sharing a single cigarette between them, and looking out over the campus. Neil steels himself, gathers his last bit of bravery and opens his mouth. “Andrew?”

Andrew shifts his head towards Neil, indicating he’s listening, and Neil starts to play with his own fingers. A couple more seconds go by, and Neil thinks he has formulated his question harmlessly.

“Why can’t you be more than 8 feet and 2 inches away from me?” Andrew inhales his next lungful of smoke a bit to suddenly, and freezes for maybe two seconds before he exhales. “Riko.” Is all he answers. Neil mulls over his answer for a bit, but can’t find an explanation within it. “What?” he prompts confused.

Andrew exhales again, and Neil could see his arm flexing from the corner of his eyes. Whatever Andrew was about to say, wasn’t something he was happy having to share, but technically, it was his turn in their truths game, and it seemed Andrew knew that as well.

“I was 8 feet and 2 inches away from you when Riko swung.” Now it was Neils turn to freeze. That admission floored Neil, not having excepted such a thought-out answer. Gearing up answer, or maybe getting Andrew to elaborate, he got cut off, because apparently Andrew wasn’t finished yet. He took yet another breath and continued, “Evermore I was not present for, and Binghamton I had you out of my sight for 5 seconds to check on Nicky and you were gone. But with 8 feet and 2 inches I could get to you.” It was quiet for what felt like hours afterwards, with Neil processing and Andrew quietly chain smoking.

“Oh” Was Neil’s answer maybe 4 cigarettes later. He didn’t want to make a big deal out of it, but he also wanted to acknowledged Andrews vulnerability. Andrew shrugged, and Neil finally looked over at him and saw how tense he was. Not really knowing how to make the situation better with words, Neil slowly reached his left hand towards the blond boy, offering the same kind of comfort Andrew has had lately.

Andrew looked from his hand, and up to his face so Neil offered him a small smile and wiggled his fingers a small bit. Andrew huffed at him, but took his hand and intertwined their fingers. With his hand in his, Neil remembered his initial question and kinda blurted it out,

“But what’s with the handholding then? I get the distance, I’m kind of a trouble magnet, but why hold my hand? That doesn’t seem necessary.” Andrew huffed out his version of a self deprecating laugh. “You are fast, and have longer legs than me.”

“So what? The handholding is just you making sure we are walking in the same tempo, and you don’t lose me in a crowd?”

“Maybe not so stupid after all” At this point that is just flat out slander against Neil Josten.

*****

I have no clue how to end this, so I give you this! There you go, hope you like it. This is my first completed and posted fic

#Andreil #Andriel #all for the gay #all for the game #aftg #Neil Josten #Andrew Minyard #oneshot #is this angsty? if you squint i guess #my writing #Zenoouh writes

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funkfuck · 4 years

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Out of Context Irish Lads 2

“We won’t have a famine... Today.”

“I’M FUCKING UP” “I want the world to knoow~” “That my brain is slow” “I’M DAITHI NOGLA”

“I probably shouldn’t throw a microwave at you while you’re in the shower.”

“You know what par is backwards? Rap.” “Nice one dude, you ARE gangster.”

“God, I can’t wait to take a shit on your honor.”

“Oh no! I’ve lit them on fire but now they’re just angry!”

“I’ve got an Indian flag! That’s almost like the Irish flag!”

“Oooh! Red mushroom, I will eat... That was not food.”

“Hello. Beepity-boop.”

“This whole fucking stream is just gonna be sex jokes.” “This whole fucking stream?”

“I have a fun quest! Let’s feed me.”

“I was trying to scan your stick but your stick wasn’t working.” “IT’S NOT MY FAULT! I’M GETTING OLDER!” “Did you try turning it off and on again?”

“Look at this bigot!”

“This music was definitely cheerful when I started but now it makes me wanna die.”

“Have you tried not dying?” “Oh yeah, I did try that, didn’t go well.”

“I’m gonna give him your body.”

“Rub my belly aswell, Kevin”

“If anyone wants to have kids, they should have to look after me for like a week first.”

“LOOK AT THAT PAIR OF BALLS DOWN IN THE HOLE!”

“Kevin said it was alright!” “No, I said I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“That was an inconsequential hole.” “That’s a big word. Haven’t heard a word that big in a while.”

“If barbed wire could make noise it’d sound like Daithi.”

“I’m sorry I’m a genius, Brian”

“We’ve got atleast an hour more of golf and I’m just going to dedicate it to getting revenge.”

“I’M BACK BITCHES”

“It’s not my fault! He yells at me if I don’t let him hit me! But he still loves me deep down I can tell!”

“This is like Funderland except not fun.”

“Haha peepee”

“GOOD THING I WAS RAISED ON A SILLY FARM! HEUHEHEUEHE!”

“The fucker’s still alive”

“Now Brian, you give me a smack too.” “Oh, I’ll give you a fucking smack of real life.”

“We get it Daniel, you’re better than the rest of us.”

“I’m past the point of happiness.”

“Nogla, I’ve been working with you for how many years now. I know you’re an asshole. I’ve met your mother and she even said he’s bit of an asshole, isn’t he and I’m like yeah, you’re right.” “No. That’s slander.”

“My nipples are rock hard right now!” “So gangster.”

“Meet at the graveyard for a trust test.”

“Daithi you’re moaning an awful lot.” “Just having a good time with his dad.”

“I’m gonna change my stream title to ‘smacking balls with The Lads’.”

“I mean like having a kid basically is playing Don’t Starve you know, just like make sure the fucker doesn’t die. That’s half of parenting.” “Yeah, the other half is not calling him ‘the fucker’.” “Fair.”

“We’re all here in the hole.”

“Brian is being suspiciously normal..”

“I may have pissed off a horde of bees.”

“Imagine if you talk and someone’s like ‘WhAt’s ThAt sOuNd???’”

“Have you noticed how quiet it is before Daithi joins?” “Yeah, that’s- I- ARE YOU SE- sorry for yelling.”

“Feck off, you Debby Downer.”

“You might get executed in about 2 seconds.”

“WHY DID NO ONE IN THE CHAT TELL ME I’M STARVING?” “THE GAME’S CALLED FUCKING DON’T STARVE”

#there will be a part 3 because theres a lot more #but for now #rtgame #callmekevin #the terroriser #terroriser #daithi de nogla

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supernatural-freek · 4 years

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Knife To My Throat

Dean x Sister!Reader, Sam x Sister!Reader

Synopsis: Hello! I have a very angsty request!!! Winchesters x sister!reader. The reader is the boy's half sibling and always seems to be forgotten. She goes through memories of them forgetting about her for early years to present. [Never picked up from school, left behind on a hunt, having to clean up after them,stuck with research,chores,ect.] It makes her snap when she was put in a life threatening situation[kidnapped for a couple of months] and they didn't even notice she was not in the bunker.

NOTE: This is a lot sadder than I thought it would be, I’m so sorry. I’m also sorry if this wasn’t quite what you were looking for but once I started I couldn’t stop and- I mess around with the ages too, so don't worry about the canon ages.

There is a trigger warning for this one. It’s not the happiest of one shots.

REQUESTED

MASTERLIST

Your life passes in snapshots.

You’re 12, the product of something between your mom and a man whose two sons stare at you with blatant resentment. You’ve slandered something, soiled someone’s image or reputation. They’ve come to your school, you see, and they know who you are. They don’t take you with them when they leave, and you’re not sad to see them go.

When you tell your mom that the Winchester boys can’t possibly be your brothers, she laughs sadly until she starts crying and holds you tightly throughout the night.

She dies when you’re 14, two years after Sam and Dean had taken one look at you and decided that didn’t want you. Someone contacts John, and you hear the Impala before you see it. It’s a majestic beast, big and proud and growling. You desperately want to touch it.

John does’t let you stay for the funeral. He’s not being cruel, he’s just gotta get back to something. You sit in the back with Sam while Dean sits in the front with John.

“I don’t really hate you,” Sam whispers, sneaking you a lolly. You take it shyly. Sam smiles. “I’m Sam.”

“I know,” you say, and his smile grows instead of wavering, and you know that things won’t be too bad if Sam’s around.

Sam leaves when you’re 16, a teenage girl who’s prone to flinching at sudden movements but can stand next to a firing gun and have a spine of steel. Sam storms out the front door in a flurry of anger and deadly hate. John shouts something about not coming back, and Sam shouts back that he doesn’t care, and then the door slams.

He doesn’t say goodbye.

Dean comes to your bed that night, wordlessly asking for comfort. You roll over and let him lie next to you before you’re cuddling in to his side and crying as silently as you can. Dean’s body shakes, but the darkness hides if he’s got tears too. You fall asleep like that, and when you wake up, Dean’s already moving around the room and there’s no way to tell if last night had been real.

When you, Dean and John pile into the Impala, you think that it’s awful lonely in the backseat.

You miss your brother.

You’re almost 18 when you and John have your first real fight. You’ve argued before, fuck knows John can’t be around another living thing without arguing with it, but this time there’s a slap from you and a threat from him and Dean has to step in the middle.

He picks John over you.

You can’t say it doesn’t hurt, but it’s expected. You stare at them, so alike in their feelings and their actions and their pain, and you scoff and shake your head and say, “I hate this family.”

“You aren’t hunting, Y/N, and that’s final!”

“And why not?” You shout back, and Dean groans because here you both go again. It’s the same argument you’ve just finished, but the anger is still rippling under your skin so you don’t walk away. “Am I just some glorified nurse? Here to clean up the messes?”

“You weren’t supposed to be my responsibility,” John seethes. He’s said it before. It doesn’t really hurt much anymore. “I’ve already lost Sam because of this life. I won’t lose you too.”

You give up fighting. It’s too tiring. You can’t be bothered.

When you’re 19, Dean comes back half-dead and without John.

You keep calm and stitch him back together again, going through too much alcohol and too many strips of cloth. You run out of dental floss for stitches, but you make fucking do, because if Dean dies on your watch, you may as well die too.

He’s not coherent the whole time he’s with you, mumbling about ghouls and blood and John, but you can’t spare a second to worry about John now, not if you want Dean to live. You manhandle him, pretending that he’s just drunk and not concussed and bleeding out.

“Fuck you,” you hiss at him as you cover him with the sheets on the bed, sitting by his side as he sinks into a troubled sleep. “You problematic fuck.”

John doesn’t come back until three days later. He’s not horribly injured, but the claw mark on his chest has smeared blood all over his front and he looks like death incarnate. He sees Dean, still unconscious on the bed, and grunts, settling into the seat at the table and closing his eyes.

“Fucking ghoul,” he sighs, and then you’re attacking him with whatever medical supplies you have left.

Dean wakes up the next day, takes the keys, and drives you and John far away from that little town. You never tell him that you left your story book on the bedside table.

It had been the last thing you’d had of your mothers.

You’re 22 when Sam truly settles back into hunting.

You know he misses Jess, know that he’s got too much weight on his shoulders, know that he wants to find Dad just so he can go back to pretending he doesn’t miss his old life. But he settles into it after a while, sitting in the front seat with Dean.

It’s still lonely in the back.

You’re 23 when John dies.

Dean and Sam are without injuries. You have a broken arm that doesn’t get properly treated before you’re leaving the hospital in the dust, the taste of ash still on your tongues.

Everything goes to shit when you’re 24. There’s something about Sam, him being a Chosen One, and Dean says that John had wanted him to kill your brother, and it’s all so confusing. You know about the visions, and you trust the visions, but then Sam and the other kids like him are mutating into something else and you’re afraid.

You know it’s the Demon, good old Yellow-Eyes, but you don’t matter to him. You don’t matter to anybody. Bobby sees you sometimes, but that’s because Bobby is an old soul in an old body and knows what it is to be in the background.

Ellen sees you too, but only because you remind her of Jo. “Don’t let them boys walk all over you,” Ellen tells you one day, when you’re sitting at the counter at the Roadhouse after the boys had taken off on one of their adventures without remembering you. “Honey, you aren’t a doormat.”

“I’m not much of anything,” you tell her and then you finish your beer and motion for another.

You’re 25 when Sam dies and Dean sells his soul and leaves you with two brothers who are forever tainted with the cold tang of death.

Dean shoots the Demon.

You’re 25 when you look at schooling options for adults.

The Hellhounds come for Dean sometime after you turn 26, and you have nightmares about Sam’s cries and Dean’s blood until you have to start taking extreme measures, like pills and alcohol and concussions.

You and Sam crash at Bobby’s house once, and you sleep easier than you have since your brother went to Hell.

When you wake up, Sam is gone and he doesn’t come back. Bobby looks at you with pitiful eyes, but you keep your head down and make yourself a list of permanent chores to do just so you have a purpose and won’t have to kill yourself.

Dean comes back while you’re still 26. You’ve given up on schooling, which is good, because Dean wants to look for Sam, and you have to scramble to get in the back seat of the Impala before he takes off with a squeal of the tires.

Bobby sits in the front. It’s not any less lonely in the back. You seem to care less now, and you wonder if it’s because the nightmares have sucked out your soul and no you’re just hollow and beaten and sad, and you don’t care anymore that your brothers don’t really care about you.

Sam causes the Apocalypse. You’re turning 28 the next day.

You meet Cas when you’re 28, but you aren’t important so he doesn’t see you. The angels don’t see you, your brothers don’t see you, and Bobby loses sight of you somewhere along the way. You slip through the cracks.

You go on a hunt on your own and it goes fine.

You’re disappointed that you don’t die.

You’re 29 when Sam jumps in the Pit with Lucifer and Michael. Cas isn’t God, and you aren’t important enough for anybody to take as leverage. Zachariah had taken Adam and Sam, but he hadn’t taken you and that should tell you to quit while you’re ahead, but you’ve already decided you’re a lot cause with school and there’s nowhere else for you to go.

Dean goes to Lisa and Ben. Cas disappears. You float around and you pretend you have purpose. You think your name becomes a legend amongst the hunters. Something about you being a ghost, here one moment and gone the next.

You’re too cold to cry, really.

You’re 30 when you attempt to kill yourself and fail.

Nobody comes to get you until you’re 32. Sam loses and gains his soul in that time. There’s someone named Samuel. There’s Alpha monsters and Death and walls in minds that shatter far too easily, and then Cas is the new God, but he’s sick.

You run into the boys on a hunt. Dean says your name with the reverence of someone who has seen God and laughed. He talks to you, and it’s nice, and then he tells you about Leviathans and Cas and your heart breaks and you crawl into the back seat of the Impala and stare out the window.

Hunters still talk about the Ghost.

Dean doesn’t know that it’s you.

You’re 33 when Dean and Cas go to Purgatory, and you’re 34 when Dean comes back.

You’re 33 when Cas comes back, too.

You’re 35 when Metatron casts the angels out of Heaven and Sam fails the Trials. It’s a mess, but there’s Kevin and the Bunker, and the angels falling look like dying stars and it’s oddly beautiful.

Kevin likes you. It’s strange because Kevin doesn’t really like anybody else. You think that its nice to be seen, but then there’s Crowley and demons and your brothers are important again and you quietly make enough food that nobody stares and clean up afterwards.

Your room stays bare. Nobody comments. You don’t think Sam or Dean could point out which room you claimed as your own anyway.

You’re 37 when Dean gets the Mark of Cain. It’s scary and it makes him into something harsher and more unstable. You try and keep quiet around him, because he seems almost hyper-aware of you now and he keeps eyeing you.

You make food and you do beer runs because that’s the role that they accept, and that’s the role you know. Charlie braids your hair once. It feels like something a sibling would do.

The Darkness brings Mary back when you’re 38.

Mary looks at you once, understands who you are and what you represent, and then she turns to her boys and smiles. You are 39 years old in a world that doesn’t want you, and you’re invisible to everybody in the damn room.

You can’t harbour any anger for Mary though.

You’re just so unbearably tired.

You’re on the cusp of turning 39 when someone steals you off the road when you’re waiting for the boys to come out from questioning a witness. You don’t know who they are, but you know they want information on your brothers, they want someone to experiment with.

They want a hunter.

They want the Ghost.

Torture becomes old soon enough, so they play mind games. It takes them a while to adapt to your apathy though, but once they understand that forcing you to imagine your brothers being nice hurts more than making you think they hated you, things get going.

You don’t talk. But you hurt.

You hurt, you hurt, you hurt.

You’re 39 when you make your escape, killing everybody there and returning to the Bunker covered in blood and wounds and you are afraid.

“What the fuck,” Dean says in a tight voice as you stumble down the stairs. Cas is already charging towards you, a glowing hand held out. You flinch away. but he’s persistent, and your wounds close slowly. “Y/N?”

Sam stares at you with wide eyes. You stare back without saying anything. Cas gently brushes his hand over your shoulder. You croak miserably and he pulls away.

“Where were you?” Dean asks.

(You’re 39 when you realise that nobody had noticed you were gone.)

You turn away, intent on going back to your plain little room, but someone holds your arm and you can’t take the touch. “Stop,” you beg and whoever is holding you lets you go.

“What-” Sam gets cut off by the guttural wail that rips from your throat.

“I was gone for months!” You seethe, voice cracking and rasping. You are 39 and you are breaking, breaking, breaking. “You didn’t come for me, you’ve never come for me.”

The Ghost, the Ghost, the Ghost.

“I am nothing and I am nobody, but I should have been somebody and you took that from me and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now.”

Cas reaches for you again. “Let me ease your troubles,” he says and fingers touch your forehead and nothing happens. “You are in too much pain.” he murmurs. “I am sorry.”

“So am I,” you whisper, and then you turn away from your brothers and you go to your plain little room.

You are 39 and half-Winchester when you press a gun to your temple and pull the fucking trigger.

#supernatural #supernatural dean #supernatural fanfiction #Supernatural fanfic #supernatural sam #supernatural angst #angst #sad #like seriously its sad #supernatural oneshot #request #sad supernatural imagines #supernatural imagine #sad supernatural one shots

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luvneedsnosyt · 5 years

Text

My Favorite Albums of 2019 (So Far)

Here is my list of my favorite albums half-way through 2019

You can find my list of my favorite albums of 2018 here And my list of my favorite EPs of 2018 here

My Monthly top albums lists from 2019: January, February, March, April, May

Honorable Mention:

Alice Merton - Mint Genre: Pop

Proof: No Roots / Lash Out

Anderson .Paak - Ventura Genre: Hip Hop / R&B

Proof: Chosen On (Feat. Sonya Elise) / Jet Black (Feat. Brandy)

Billie Eilish - WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO? Genre: Synth-Pop

Proof: bad guy / you should see me in a crown

blackbear - ANONYMOUS Genre: alt-R&B / Hip Hop

Proof: SWEAR TO GOOD / HIGH1X

Bring Me the Horizon - amo Genre: Rock / Alternative

Proof: in the dark / medicine

Cautious Clay - Table of Context EP Genre: R&B / Soul

Proof: REASONS / HONEST ENOUGH

Circa Waves - What’s It Like Over There? Genre: Alternative / Rock

Proof: Sorry I’m Yours / Be Somebody Good

Dabin - Wild Youth Genre: Electronic / Dance / Future Bass

Proof: In Flames (Feat. Lexi Norton) / Alive (Feat. RUNN)

Dawn Richard - New Breed Genre: alt-R&B / Electronic

Proof: shades / sauce

Dermot Kennedy - Dermot Kennedy Genre: Indie Pop / Soul

Proof: Power Over Me / Moments Passed

GoldLink - Diaspora Genre: Hip Hop / R&B

Proof: Zulu Screams (Feat. Maleek Berry & Babi Bourelly) / More

Hozier - Wasteland, Baby! Genre: Indie Pop / Soul / Folk

Proof: Movement / Dinner & Diatribes

James Blake - Assume Form Genre: Progressive Pop / Electronic / Indie Pop

Proof: Barefoot in the Park (Feat. ROSALÍA) / Where’s the Catch? (Feat. André 3000)

Karen O & Danger Mouse - Lux Prima Genre: Alternative / Indie Rock

Proof: Turn the Light / Woman

Kevin Abstract - ARIZONA BABY Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Joyride / Use Me

Maverick Sabre - When I Wake Up Genre: Pop / Soul

Proof: Slow Down (Feat. Jorja Smith) / Weakness

The List:

16. Little Simz - GREY Area Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Offense / Boss / Venom / Pressure (Feat. Little Dragon)

15. Vampire Weekend - Father of the Bride Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

Proof: Harmony Hall / This Life / How Long? / Sympathy

14. LÉON - LÉON Genre: Pop / Soul

Proof: Lost Time / Falling / Hope Is A Heartache / You And I // Bonus: Grey - Want You Back (Feat. LÉON)

13. Foals - Part 1: Everything Not Saved Will Be Lost Genre: Rock / Alternative

Proof: Exits / White Onions / In Degrees / On The Luna

12. Denzel Curry - ZUU Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: ZUU / RICKY / BIRDZ (Feat. Rick Ross) / CAROLMART (Feat. Ice Billion Berg)

11. G Flip - Drink Too Much EP Genre: Pop

Proof: Drink Too Much / Bring Me Home / Killing My Time / About You // Bonus: I Am Not Afraid

10. Elohim - BRAINDEAD EP Genre: Electronic / Synth Pop

Proof: running / tv / metamorphine / flagpole sitta (Harvey Danger cover w/ ALOWNATION)

9. Sigrid - Sucker Punch Genre: Pop

Proof: Sucker Punch / Basic / Don’t Feel Like Crying / Don’t Kill My Vibe // Bonus: Strangers (R3HAB Remix) / Don’t Kill My Vibe (Gryffin Remix)

8. Lizzo - Cuz I Love You Genre: Hip Hop / R&B

Proof: Cuz I Love You / Soulmate / Tempo (Feat. Feat. Missy Elliott) / Heaven Help Me

7. Seven Lions - Ophelia Volume 1 Genre: Electronic / Dance / Trance

Proof: Start Again (Feat. Fiora) / Ocean (w/ Jason Ross Feat. Jonathon Mendelsohn) / First Time (w/ SLANDER & Dabin Feat. Dylan Mathew) / Dreamin’ (Feat. Fiora) // Bonus: Ocean (Au5 Remix) w/ Jason Ross Feat. Jonothan Mendelson / Dreamin’ (Sunny Lax Remix) Feat. Fiora / Island (Dimibo Remix) (w/ Trivecta & Wooli Feat. Nevve) / Sojourn (w/ Crystal Skies) / Let Go (Festival Mix) Feat. Fiora

6. Maggie Rogers - Heard It In A Past Life Genre: Pop

Proof: Give A Little / The Knife / Alaska / Say It // Bonus: Give A Little (Mokita & GOLDHOUSE Remix) / Alaska (Toby Green Remix) / Alaska (Tycho Remix)

5. Nick Murphy - Run Fast Sleep Naked Genre: Indie Pop

Proof: Harry Takes Drugs On The Weekend / Sanity / Yeah I Care / Dangerous

4. Tyler, The Creator - IGOR Genre: Hip Hop / alt-R&B

Proof: IGOR’S THEME (Feat. Lil Uzi Vert) / EARFQUAKE (Feat. Playboy Carti, Charlie Wilson & Jessy Wilson) / I THINK (Feat. Solange & Ryan Beatty) / WHAT’S GOOD (Feat. slowthai & Jarrod Carmichael)

3. Khalid - Free Spirit Genre: Pop / R&B / Soul

Proof: Better / Right Back / Outta My Head (w/ John Mayer) / Free Spirit // Bonus: Better (Jayvon Remix) / Better (no clue? Remix) / Talk (Disclosure VIP Mix) / Talk (Jarami Remix) / Talk (Alle Farben Remix)

2. Big Wild - Superdream // Superdream (Remixes) EP Genre: Electronic / Synth Pop / Dance

Proof: Joypunks / 6′ to 9′s (Feat. Rational) / No Words / She Makes Magic // Purple Sand (My Home) (pluko Remix) / City of Sound (Crooked Colours Remix) / Heaven (GG Magree Remix)

1. Nilüfer Yanya - Miss Universe Genre: Pop / R&B / Alterntaive

Proof: In Your Head / Paralysed / Tears / Heavyweight Champion Of The Year

Others:

Good: Adela - On The Line EP, AJ Tracey - AJ Tracey, Aldous Harding - Designer, Alesso - ALESSO MIXTAPE - PROGRESSO Vol. 1 EP, Alina Baraz - The Color Of You (Remixes) EP, Allie X - Super Sunset (Analog), Aly & AJ - Sanctuary EP, The Amazons - Future Dust, Anna Clendening - Waves EP, Ari Lennox - Shea Butter Baby, Anna Lunoe - Right Party EP, Ariana Grande - thank u, next, Ashe - Moral of the Story: Chapter 1 EP, Asiahn - Love Train 2, AURORA - A Different Kind of Human, Autograf - Love & Retrograde EP, Avicii - TIM, A1 - Turbulence, Bad Bunny - X 100PRE, Barrie - Happy to Be Here, Bassnector - Reflective (Part 4) EP, Bastille - Doom Days, BAYNK - Someone’s II EP, Beast Coast - Escape from New York, Beirut - Gallipoli , Better Oblivion Community Center - Better Oblivion Community Center, Betty Who - Betty, Big K.R.I.T. - TDT, Big Thief - U.F.O.F., Blaqk Audio - Only Things We Love, Blu & Oh No - A Long Red Hot Los Angeles Summer Night, Boy Harsher - Careful, Boogie - Everythings for Sale, B00TY - High Art EP, Brasstracks - Before We Go EP, Broken Social Scene - Let’s Try the After (Vol. 1) EP, Broken Social Scene - Let’s Try the After (Vol. 2) EP, Broods - Don’t Feed The Pop Monster, bülow - Crystalline EP, Bun B & Statik Selektah - TrillStatik [Mixtape], Cage The Elephant - Social Cues, Carlie Hanson - Junk EP, Carly Rae Jepsen - Dedicated, Casey Veggies - Organic, Casey Veggies & Rockie Fresh - Fresh Veggies [Mixtape], Cehryl - Slow Motion, Charly Bliss - Young Enough, Chase & Status - RTRN II JUNGLE, The Chemical Brothers - No Geography, Cherry Glazer - Stuffed & Ready, Choosey & Exile - Black Beans, Christelle Bofale - Swim Team EP, Chrome Sparks - Be On Fire EP, Ciara - Beauty Marks, Citizen Cope - Heroin and Helicopters, Clairmont The Second - The Second’s Do You Drive?, Collie Buddz - Hybrid. Crumb - Jinx, Crystal Fighters - Gaia & Friends, Curren$y & Statik Selektah - Gran Turismo, CZARFACE & Ghostface Killa - Czarface Meets Ghostface, David B - BLEU, Deadmau5 - Polar (Music from the Netflix Film), Deante’ Hitchcock - Just A Sample 2 EP, Deerhunter - Why Hasn’t Everything Already Disappeared?, DeJ Loaf - Go DeJ Go Vol. 1 EP, Delta Heavy - Only In My Dreams, Destiny Rogers - Tomboy EP, Devin Morrison - Bussin’, Dijon - Sci Fi 1 EP, Dinah Jane - Dinah Jane 1 EP, Diplo - Europa EP, Diplo - Higher Ground EP, DJ Khaled - Father of Asahd, Dog Blood - Turn Off The Lights EP, Dreezy - Big Dreez, The Drums - Brutalism, Dua Saleh - Nūr EP, DUCKWRTH - THE FALLING MAN, ELHAE - Trouble In Paradise, Emily Wells - The World Is Too ___ For You, Emotional Oranges - The Juice, Vol. I, Eric Bellinger - The Rebirth 2, Eryn Allen Kane - a tree planted by water EP, The Faint - Egowerk, FEELS - Post Earth, FIDLAR - Almost Free, flora cash - Press EP, Flume - Hi This Is Flume [Mixtape], Flying Lotus - Flamagra, Frances Cone - Late Riser, FRENSHIP - Vacation, Freya Riding - You Mean The World To Me EP, Froth - Duress, Gary Clark Jr. - This Land, Gesaffelstein - Hyperion, The Get Up Kids - Problems, Giggs - BIG BAD…, girlpool - What Chaos Is Imaginary, gnash - we, GRiZ - Find My Own Way EP, GRiZ - Ride Waves, Gryffin - Gravity Pt. 1 (Remixes) EP, GTA - La Nueva Clásica (Remixes), Gus Dapperton - Where Polly People Go to Read, HÆLOS - Any Random Kindness, The Hamiltones - Watch the Ton3s EP, Hayden James - Between Us, The Head and the Heart - Living Mirage, Helado Negro - This Is How You Smile, Hello Yello - Love Wins EP, Higher Brothers - Five Stars, Hikaru Utada - Face My Fears EP, Holly Herndon - PROTO, Ida Mae - Chasing Light, ilo ilo - wish i said this to u sooner EP, India.Arie - Worthy, Injury Reserve - Injury Reserve, Intellexual - Intellexual, Interpol - A Fine Mess EP, Izzy Bizu - GLITA EP, Jack & Jack - A Good Friend Is Nice, Jacob Latimore - Connection2, Jade Bird - I Get No Joy EP, Jade Bird - Jade Bird, Jaden - ERYS IS COMING EP, Jai Waetford - Figure It Out EP, Jai Wolf - The Cure To Loneliness, James Bay - One My Messy Mind EP, JAMESDAVIS - MASTERPIECE EP, Jamie Cullum - Taller, Jamila Woods - LEGACY! LEGACY!, The Japanese House - Good At Falling, Jasmine Thompson - colour EP, Jay Prince - WONDER EP, Jayda G - Significant Changes, Jean Deaux - Empathy EP, Jenny Lewis - On The Line, Jeremy Zucker & Chelsea Cutler - brent EP, jesse saint john - don’t stop dancing. life gets sad. EP, J-E-T-S - Zoospa, JOHN.k - if we never met EP, JOHNNYSWIM - Moonlight, JOHKOY - 404, Jonas Brothers - Happiness Begins, Jordan Rakei - Origin, Josephine Wiggs - We Fall, Judah & The Lion - Pep Talks, Juice WRLD - Death Race for Love, Julia Michaels - Inner Monologue, Pt. 1 EP, Kari Faux - CRY 4 HELP EP, Kasbo - Places We Don’t Know Remix EP, Kaskade - Redux 003, KÁRYYN - The Quanta Series, Kehlani - While We Wait EP, Kelsey Lu - Blood, Kerli - Shadow Works, Kevin Abstract - ARIZONA BABY EP, Kevin Abstract - Ghettoboy EP, Kevin Morby - Oh My God, KIAN - BLISS EP, Kiana Lede - Myself EP, Kishi Bashi - Omoiyari, Koffee - Rapture EP, Ladytron - Ladytron, Lafawndah - Ancestor Boy, Lemaitre - Fast Lovers EP, The Lemonheads - Varshons 2, Lexie Liu - 2030, Lil Skies - Shelby, Lissie - When I’m Alone: The Piano Retrospective, Local Natives - Violet Street, Logic - Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Lolo Zouaï - High Highs to Low Lows, Loote - lost EP, Lonas - Youth EP, Lost Kings - Paper Crowns EP, Louis Futon - Way Back When, Loyle Carner - Not Waving, But Drowning, LSD - Labrinth, Sia & Diplo Presents… LSD, Lucky Daye - Painted, Lucy Rose - No Words Left, Mac DeMarco - Here Comes the Cowboy, Mack Keane - Donna Ave EP, Manila Killa - 1993 EP, Malibu Ken (Aesop Rock & TOBACCO) - Malibu Ken, Manatee Commune - PDA, Mansionair - Shadowboxer, Marco McKinnis - E’Merse EP, Maren Morris - GIRL, Maribou State - Kingdoms in Color Remixed, MARINA - LOVE + FEAR, Matt Maeson - Bank on the Funeral, McClenny - I’m Not Here EP, MED & Guilty Simpson - Child of the Jungle, Meg Mac - Hope, Megan Thee Stallion - Fever, Melii - phAses, Mereba - The Jungle Is The Only Way Out, Mickey Kojak - Coming Together EP, Middle Kids - New Songs for Old Problems EP, Mike Posner - A Real Good Kid, Mr. Carmack - Demolish [Mixtape], Mndsgn - Snaxx, MorMor - Some Place Else EP, The National - I Am Easy to Find, Nightly - Talk You Down EP, NIKI - wanna take this downtown? EP, Nina Nesbitt - The Sun Will Come Up, The Seasons Will Change, no rome - Crying In The Prettiest Places EP, Noah Kahan - Busyhead, Norah Jones - Begin Again, Octavian - Endorphins, ODESZA - A Moment Apart Remixes EP, Offset - Father of Four, Oliver Dion - Exposed, Olivia O’Brien - Was It Even Real?, Omar Apollo - Friends EP, Panda Bear - Buoys, Patoranking - Wilmer, P!nk - Hurts 2B Human, Pink Sweat$ - Volume 2 EP, Phonte - Pacific Time EP, Plaid - Polymer, PnB Rock - TrapStar Turnt PopStar, Pond - Tasmania, PRETTYMUCH - Phases EP, Priests - The Seduction of Kansas, Prince - Originals, PUP - Morbid Stuff, Queen Herby - EP 5, Quelled Chris - Guns, Raja Kumari - BLOODLINE EP, Rat Boy - International Unknown, Raveena - Lucid, Rema - Rema EP, Reptaliens - VALIS, Rich The Kid - The World Is Yours 2, Rico Nasty & Kenny Beats - Anger Management, Rhye - Spirit, Rhys Lewis - In Between Minds EP, Rotimi - Walk With Me EP, Rudimental - Test Our Differences, Ruti - Racing Cars EP, Ryan Leslie - Fleurier Flows EP, RY X - Unfurl, RY X - The Water EP, SAFE - STAY, Said The Whale - Cascadia, St. Lucia - Remixed, Sammie - Everlasting, Santana - Africa Speaks, Santi - Mandy & The Jungle, Sara Bareilles - Amidst the Chaos, SASAMI - SASAMI, Saweetie - ICY EP, ScHoolboy Q - CrasH Talk, The Score - Pressure EP, Seasons - American Authors, Set It Off - Midnight, Set Mo - Surrender, Shafiq Husayn - The Loop, Sharon Van Etten - Remind Me Tomorrow, Shlohmo - The End, Shy Girls - Bird on the Wing, Silversun Pickups - Widow’s Weeds , Skepta - Ignorance Is Bliss, slenderbodies - soraya EP, slowthai - Nothing Great About Britain, Smif-N-Wessun - The All, Snake City - Hurts, SNBRN - Solé, SOAK - Grim Town, SOB X RBE & Hit-Boy - Family Not a Group, SOB X RBE & Marshmello - Roll the Dice EP, Sofia Kourtesis - Sofia Kourtesis EP, Solange - When I Get Home, SonReal - The Aaron LP, StayLoose - The City, Stef Chura - Midnight, Steve Lacy - Apollo XXI, Striking Matches - Morning EP, Styles P - S.P. The Goat: Ghost of All Time, Sufjan Stevens - Love Yourself / With My Whole Heart EP, Summer Walker - CLEAR EP, Sunflower Bean - King of the Dudes EP, Super Duper - Vessels EP, SVEA - This is EP, SYML - SYML, The Tallest Man On Earth - I Love You, Talos - Far Out Dust, Tank and the Bangas - Green Balloon, Tayla Parx - We Need To Talk, Taylor Bennett - The American Reject EP, Tech N9ne - N9na, TENDER - Fear of Falling Asleep, Terror Jr - Unfortunately, Terror Jr, Tiësto - Together, Tink - Voicemails, The-Dream - Menage a Trois: Sextape Vol. 1,2&3, T-Pain - 1UP, TOBi - STILL, Tom Walker - What A Time To Be Alive, Toro y Moi - Outer Peace, Tory Lanez - International Fargo [Mixtape], Trevor Jackson - Rough Draft 2, Tritonal - U & Me , The Vamps - Missing You EP, Various Artists - For The Throne (Music Inspired by the HBO Series Game of Thrones), Various Artists - Music Inspired by the Film Roma, Vasco - Tender Luv EP, Virginia to Vegas - Heartland St EP, Walshy Fire - Walsey Fire Presents: ABENG, Wallows - Nothing Happens, Wand - Laughing Matter, Weezer - Weezer (The Teal Album), Weyes Blood - Titanic Rising, Wild Belle - Everybody One of a Kind, Wu-Tang Clan - Of Mics and Men EP, X Ambassadors - ORION EP, XYLØ - pretty sad EP, Yeasayer - Erotic Reruns, Yeek - IDK WHERE, YG - 4REAL 4REAL, Yhung T.O. - On My Momma 2, Zacari - Run Free Run Wild EP, Zhavia Ward - 17 EP, 2 Chainz - Rap or Go to the League

Meh: A Boogie wit da Hoodie - Hoodie SZN, Berner - El Chivo, Birdman & Juvenile - Just Another Gangsta, Burna Boy & DJDS - Steel & Copper EP, Calboy - Wildboy, Casilofi - Create, Create, Create EP, DREAMERS - LAUNCH FLY LAND, DJ Muggs & Mach - Hommy: Tuez-Les Tous, Future - Future Hndrexx Presents: The WZRD, Future - SAVE ME EP, HiDoraah & Dolly White - Slimestas EP, Kenny Garrett - Hoax, Kevin Gates - Only The General Gon Understand EP, Logic - Supermarket, Miley Cyrus - SHE IS COMING EP, Night Lovell - GOODNIGHT LOVELL, Pet Shop Boys - Agenda EP, Pi’erre Bourne & Cardo Got WIngs - Pi’erre & Cardo’s WIld Adventure [Mixtape], Rod Wave - PTSD, Shy Glizzy - Covered N Blood, Spellling - Mazy Fly, Tee Grizzley - Scriptures, Tyga - Legendary, Wiz Khalifa & Curren$y - 2009, 03 Greedo - Still Summer in the Projects

Naw: Scarlxrd - INFINITY, Weezer - Weezer (The Black Album), Yung Gravy - Sensational, Zheani - The Line Censored

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kevinspaceyarchives · 5 years

Note

Are you so committed to someone you don’t know that you have to twist yourself up like a pretzel to defame someone? Your logic is specious. Stop slandering my actual friend who was indeed telling the truth about an open secret in our industry.

Since your question is one of the least offensive ones I’ve received today, I’ll address it. Then I’m moving on.

I was answering an anonymous query from someone who put forth a not entirely implausible idea regarding Mr. Rapp’s experience with Spacey. The idea that I’m defaming or slandering Rapp is what’s specious. That not everyone on this planet sees Rapp’s story through the same lens doesn’t mean they are slandering him or twisting themselves into a pretzel. I can’t expect you to know anything about this blog (or me), or to have read posts I’ve made the past year and half (my previous blog was lost), but I am fully aware of the accusations, stories, and allegations of against Kevin Spacey. I have never once denied the reality of them, or that the behavior was real. I’ve never said I thought Kevin was innocent, although he’s certainly not guilty of every claim against him. The truth is what has been distorted into a pretzel, not me. Rapp has been a useful if perhaps unwitting tool in that particular agenda. I will share with you something I wrote last year, as it sums up how I feel based on information shared with me by someone close to Kevin:

“Kevin is a great talent, as well as a person who has contributed to this world in other positive ways, so that deserves recognition. I don’t find him a disgraceful person, although the behavior that lead to all of this certainly is. It’s not acceptable.

I do find Kevin himself to be brave in that he is confronting his own trauma and behavior; and is doing what he needs to do to become a better person. I find anyone willing to do that inspirational. It can be incredibly painful to look in the mirror and hate who you see, but fortunately, human beings are capable of change. I reject the idea that if someone has problems and issues in one aspect of their life then their entire life must condemned, labeled, and deemed unworthy of anything other than shame or hatred. If we have a broken leg, we fix it. If we have a tumor, we remove it. If we have an infection, we take antibiotics. We don’t just give up and wait to die. The same can be said of mental trauma and damage. It can be healed, if we are willing.

When all is said and done, what’s happened might be for the best. Kevin might choose to never act again, but if he can find peace of mind, reconcile his past, and be his authentic self (not hiding behind acting roles, money or fame) then it will have been worth it. I think that one day down the road, when he is ready, he might use his considerable talent to not only make amends with those he has hurt, but to perhaps make a positive impact in other ways. Only time will tell, but it’s my sincere belief.”

You can accuse me of “victim shaming” if you want, but your friend often uses his story to bully people who question it in any way, shape, or form. I would think that Spacey’s breathtaking fall from grace, a ruined career, irreparable harm to his legacy as an actor an advocate of the arts, and his own acknowledgement that he needed to address his behavior (which he is doing) would bring some satisfaction to Rapp - as he was instrumental in getting that ball rolling. But apparently not, as he seems to scour tumblr in the middle of the night looking for posts about himself. When he found mine he shared it, knowing it would enrage his fans and they would rush to his defense. The response was of course predictable: Waves of sympathy telling him to stay strong, and vicious ad hominem attacks. “Stay strong” from a little blog post suggesting his memory might be faulty? Geesh. It’s curious why he would even bother with it. Wouldn’t it be easier to just ignore some random comment on the internet and continue on with his blessed life? Now he’s given it a far bigger platform that it ever would have had. This kind of thing is why some people question his motivation.

For the record, I have never directly addressed Mr. Rapp, bullied him, or encouraged anyone to do so, but I can’t help but think he’ll find a measure of satisfaction knowing my mailbox was filled with hate this morning.

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pixieungerstories · 5 years

Text

Housemate - 3

Sticker Promotion is still up on Patreon until Feb 2. Get a housemate sticker for each dollar pledged. I have one for each character.

Vinny was a lot less sure of this once she saw all the other… people who lived in the house. It was one thing to understand, intellectually that she was going to be the only human, and the only woman in the house. I was another thing to be faced by a number of large males, any of whom could end her life without trying. It looked like they all had assigned seating. Vinny watched them start unpacking the food. It was a lot of food. “Excuse me, ma’am?”

Vinny jumped. The voice behind her was deep with an accent that was really weird hybrid of Scottish and Texas. She turned and came boobs to belt buckle with a minotaur. While she stared up at him in shock, he eased past her and took a seat at the table. The drider dropped from the ceiling and slid into one of the other seats. Vinny came over to the table and considered the last two chairs. Then she looked at Bazur. “Which one is Kevin?” Something bumped into the backs of her calves, making her wobble and dance to the side. A small truck walked past her and jumped into one of the remaining chairs. “Huh.” she said, finally as she took the last seat. “What?” rumbled the orc, as he watched her through narrowed eyes. The tusks meant that orcs always looked like they were frowning, but the wrinkled brow suggested that he was actually frowning. Vinny cleared her throat and accepted the fried rice the minotaur was passing her. “I, um, I’ve never… “ She stopped and tried again, “Mimics are rare. I’ve never actually seen - met one before. I was half convinced that was just some prank you pulled to see how people would react. Kevin opened his lid and reached out a midnight black arm holding a pair of chopsticks. Vinny realized she was staring. She blinked and looked over to see the minotaur patiently holding a carton of lemon chicken in her direction. She hurried to take some rice so she could pass it along and take the chicken. “I don’t suppose you would take a moment to introduce yourselves?” They all froze and looked at her like she had grown a second head. “Ok. I’ll start. Hi! I’m Vinny. I’m in my fourth year of biochem at the local U.” No one said anything. They all just stared. Vinny cleared her throat. ‘If you can’t be bothered because I didn’t pass the interview, it’s ok to tell me that. I would rather know.” The mostly normal looking guy sitting to her left said, “Haven’t we scared you off yet? You smell scared.” Vinny narrowed her eyes. “That would make you …” she drew out the last syllable as she racked her brain then blurted out, “Derick” a moment before he did. Derick smirked, “See! You didn’t need introductions after all!” The minotaur cleared his throat. “We can be polite, we are just out of practice. I’m Tristan.” Vinny nodded. The rest of the men introduced themselves after that, except for Kevin who was busy shoveling food into his mouth and Thea who just waved shyly.

Vinny sighed.

----

“No! Absolutely not!”

Vinny took a deep breath and considered her mom across the breakfast table. Her little brother was snickering into his milk. “I really did investigate every other possibility before I applied and-”

“And that’s another thing! You went there by yourself? Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? What if something had happened?”

Now Vinny narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms. “I took Jenn with me. And you don’t like this solution? Fine! Tell me how this is supposed to work?”

“You can take a cab home.”

“Really? After hours rates would be $40 a trip, twice a week for fifteen weeks a semester. That’s like $1200 a term. You flat out refused to let me take Uber at that time of night. Which is worse? Random, stranger driving an Uber at 10:30 at night? Or a ex-military orc who was honourably discharged? And you get to know exactly who the orc is and you can give his very specific details to the cops if I go missing.”

“I don’t like this, Vincenzia! We can get someone to pick you up.”

“Ma! Who? You need to be home with JJ-”

Vinny’s little brother looked up from his cereal and said, “Hey! I can take care of myself!”

They both ignored him. “You can’t load him into a car at 10:00 on a school night to drive the half hour trip to campus. You going to leave him here, alone for the hour minimum that it is going to take to pick me up? And that’s ignoring that you don’t like driving at night. And that you have to be up at five thirty to be at work on time.”

They glared at each other. Everyone said it was easy to see where Vinny got her tenacity from.

“It’s Saturday. Kogan is coming to church with us tomorrow and we are invited over there for brunch so you can meet the guys and see where I’ll be staying and everything.”

Valerie Jovani narrowed her eyes. “I thought you said you were going to be the cook. How are we going to go for brunch at their house if they don’t cook?’ She asked the question like a poker player laying down an ace.

Vinny shrugged, “It doesn’t matter if they feed us pop tarts and beer, the brunch isn’t the point.”

“No, the point is that you are not moving into a house with a bunch of men. You are not Snow White, they are not the seven dwarves.”

“Does that make you the evil queen?” JJ asked with his mouth full.

Mrs Jovani was stunned into silence for long enough for Vinny to make her get away.

----

Vinny knew this wasn’t going to work as soon as Kogan pulled up to their church riding a Road Hawg Orc motorcycle. It was big. It was loud. It was built for a seven foot, three hundred pound plus rider. He removed a helmet that had a stylized orc skull on the side. He pulled off a pair of sunglasses and tucked them into the pocket of his worn leather jacket. He looked a little better when he took off the jacket to reveal a blue dress shirt and navy tie. Except...

“Well, bless me father for I have sinned, ” it was muttered darkly under her breath, but it still wasn’t something Vinny wanted to hear from her Aunt Toni.

Val tried to be subtle as she kicked her sister in the shins.

Toni turned on her heels and made eye contact with her sister as she mouthed, “oh my god he is hot.”

Vinny rolled her eyes. Yeah. Kogan knew how to fill out a shirt. And the slight paunch somehow just made his shoulders look broader. This was not the reaction she was hoping for.

She wasn't pleased when Aunt Toni invited herself to brunch. Jesus.

At least Kogan knew the words. And when to stand and sit during mass. She almost died during the sign of peace when JJ pushed up Kogan’s sleeve and announced, “Whoa! Cool rosary tattoo dude!”

Brunch was in the garden. It was crepes and fruit with whipped cream. Everyone was dressed up. Sort of. Bazur was at least wearing pants. Thea was wearing a brown tartan bow tie and a polo shirt. He wasn’t wearing anything else, but clothing was also optional for driders. It might have been better if JJ hadn’t asked if he could pet the drider. Vinny grabbed his arm and dragged him a way to explain that his had just asked to rub the nice man’s ass. JJ thought that was hilarious.

Aunt Toni spent entirely too much time staring at Tristan thoughtfully.

Vinny felt like she spent the whole time trying to wrangle her family so they wouldn’t be completely rude to her potential bosses.

OMG! Aunt Toni just slowly sucked whipped cream off her finger while making heavy eye contact with Tristan. Vinny was on her way over to have words with her aunt when the woman shifted uncomfortably in her seat and blushed.

Val frowned from across the table, “You ok, Toni?”

Vinny watched as her aunt started to fan herself, “Hot flash,” Toni announced. “I’ll be fine in a moment.” The last word came out as a squeek.

Vinny felt the blood drain from her face as she looked around and couldn’t find Kevin. She looked at Bazur in horror. He blinked, then quickly shook his head and pointed to a side table where JJ had set his orange juice. Vinny marched over picked up the glass and muttered, “Come with me if you want to live,” under her breath. She didn’t wait to see if it was going to work but after a few steps she heard the pitter patter of mimic feet behind her. She marched right in the back door and made a right into the living room.

Once she was in the center of the room she spun on her heels and came face to face with a giant rocking horse.

“Really? That’s what you are going with here?”

The rocking horse blurred and was replaced with a sea trunk. Vinny wished she knew how that worked but also was kind of glad she didn’t.

“I have been assured you talk, even if I’ve never heard it.”

The sea chest gave no indication of life.

“I wanna know if you are gonna sabotage this for me. I don’t exactly have a lot of options here. I know it. Ma knows it. But she isn’t gonna want me staying here if she thinks it isn’t safe and I’m not gonna wanna stay here if I know she is worried about me. Pop left years ago. It’s been her and me as a team since then. And, yeah, I know Aunt Toni is being inappropriate. But she’s not the one who will be living here. But she is mom’s sister and her opinion will count for something too.”

Still no response.

“And, yeah, I have no idea how her thing with Tristan is going to play out. But I can’t exactly ask her if she recognizes him in front of my mom and my brother now can I?”

Nothing.

Vinny hesitated, “If you are actually a really nice guy who is just being slandered by the others, I am sorry.”

After a moment she said, “Ok. Good talk,” and she went back outside. At the threshold she was sure she heard snickering.

When she got back out to the garden, Ma and Kogan were having a quiet word in the back corner. Tristen was giving Aunt Toni and impromptu lecture about varieties of lily. Toni looked bored out of her mind. JJ was playing Go Fish with Thea and Dren.

Finally, it was time to go and as they all loaded into the car, Val turned to Toni and asked, “What the hell - sorry JJ - was that thing with the whipped cream?”

Toni laughed, then coughed, and said, “I thought I recognized the minotaur. But I was thinking of someone else.”

“Yeah well now Vinny’s gonna haveta apologize for you when she moves in. Otherwise they won’t let us come back to visit.”

#drider #minotaur #werewolf #gargoyle #slime #gelatinous #orc #mimic #monster boyfriend #monsters #monster harem #co-ed #terato #exophilia

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go-diane-winchester · 6 years

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Dear Misha Collins

I don't think you know how to handle your career. There are mistakes that you are making to your own detriment. I am doing the decent thing here by pointing them out to you. When you are an actor, you are the salesman and the product. These two elements are a benefit to an actor when he manages these two things cleverly, which you have not done. These two elements are symbiotic. You need them both. And the dominant element is the salesman. If the product is good, but the salesman sucks, the product is not appreciated.

Take Sam and Dean Winchester as a good example. Sam is a flawed hero. He is also, to an extent in the earlier seasons, something of an anti-hero although not a full blown villain. Dean wasn't as flawed and his swashbuckling gung-ho nature was easier to enjoy than Sam's pensiveness. Those who didn't know much about the BTS of the show in the early season, latched on to the lead characters. At that time they didn't know the actors. For many of them, Sam appeared kind of self-righteous and grumpy. Yes, he was handsome, but so was Dean who are the more funnier, showier character, so it was easy to latch onto him. Dean also bonds with other characters faster than Sam does.

When the first cons were held, people were enthusiastic about meeting the actors who play Sam and Dean expecting the actors to be exactly like their characters. When they realized that Jared is absolutely nothing like his character and was, by nature, quite a loveable and happy young man, they loved him back enthusiastically. But they encountered Jensen's reserved nature, some thought he was shy whilst others thought he was a snob. Because Jared was such an awesome salesman, his product [Sam] became more palatable to the audience. Jensen realized that as a salesman, he had a little work to do. Being construed as shy is not bad, but being seen as a snob is definitely not a good look. So he started trying to change his public image, despite his reserved nature.

So you have to examine your audience and make necessary changes to your salesman pitch, so as to not put off your target market. Then people started to see meaningfulness in the friendship that J2 share. Some liked the chemistry their character's shared. The actors acknowledged that these ideas existed but didn't shoot them down. Jensen said that he understood it was a ''hot fantasy'', which is very accurate. They just requested that fans not ask them questions on the subject, which makes sense, because why would you want my opinion on your fantasy. That is ridiculous. These two groups, Tinhat fans and wincest fans, have been around for 13 years, without making a peep. You don't hear about them, unless you go looking for them. And unlike a few nasty people on Twitter, the majority has since the beginning, respected J2.

Part of the credit for this goes to the actors themselves. They didn't overindulge this subsection, because that would be an idiotic sales pitch. I don't think you understand why. Why is it that Sam and Dean's popularity hasn't waned? They have shouldered the burden of a show that is now in its fourteenth season. They are getting more popular and mass media has an eye on them, which is why they are invited on talk shows, sporadically. You were invited on Larry King, but it was not because of your work on the show, it was for your charity project. And your charity project is not your livelihood. Your acting job is, and it isn't looking very good. You weren't even a series regular last year, and most people didn't seem to mind.

Here is where your sales pitch is going wrong.

You fragment the total viewing population of the show

You do this by your con etiquette. The fans who buy tickets to watch your panel are a heterogeneous group of people. The problem with having this type of audience, is that you have to curb your language around them, because children attend cons too. You use vulgar language. You also speak about sexually explicit things like shipping. The parents and older siblings sitting in the audience might be offended, and that never occurred to you. That is very baffling. The parents who are not offended stay on and those who are, won't watch a Misha panel again with their kids. Fragmentation. You have broken your total con audience in two.

When people ask you about shipping, you don't politely acknowledge it and move on. You ''lay it on thick'' as they say. There is a lot that is wrong with that.

Any straight male fan who genuinely admires your character is not likely going to sit through something he doesn't care about. Especially since you become very explicit. He will feel kind of grossed out, as he should, not because he's homophobic but because this is not his jam. By overdoing the shipping thing, you have forced a decision out of this fan as to whether he wants to pay good money to sit through this nonsense again. The next time he attends con, he is going to spend his money elsewhere. That also goes for straight female fans who don't like shipping. Because not all women like slash. And they will try not to attend you panel again because it didn't entertain them. Second fragmentation.

There are other ships in the fandom. That is the natural progression of things went one ship appears on a show or movie. That initial pairing pulls all the other characters in. So almost everyone of the well known actors on Supernatural have been slashed with another actor. All except Tahmoh Penikett and Alexander Calvert, to the best of my knowledge. I am not sure why Tahmoh is ignored but it might have something to do with his character killing Kevin. I think Alex is not slashed because every other man is a father figure on the show, and Alex plays a baby. You tend to indulge mostly the destiel fanbase, and destiel is discussed in almost all your panels. What is wrong with that? You isolate people who don't like destiel for whatever reason. If they don't like a pairing, they are not going to sit through a panel where that pairing is sporadically discussed. That is not what they paid for. In a convention, where audience members have been asked not to ask shipping questions, and every other guest honors the rule except you, it makes you look unprofessional and a rule breaker. That is not a good look for a salesman. Third fragmentation.

So what if you speak about destiel? You have fans. They love you. How is that detrimental to your popularity? I will explain that further down.

You bite the hand that feeds you

If you have been employed on a show for ten years, you cant badmouth that show. Especially when you are incorrect. In 2013, you said that the show was 'gratuitously misogynistic', during one of your panels. Since then, the show has been bringing in unnecessary female characters. This is aggravating for fans who were watching the show since before you got casted. They didn't like most of the female characters, and yes the non-approving fans were all female. Ratings were still good and the show was popular. There were female characters whom the fans had no problem with, for example, Missouri Mosley, Ellen Harvelle, Pamela Barnes and to a certain extent even Ava.

Ever since your statement, CW and associated twitter pages blew up with accusation from ''concerned fans'' who were now asking for ''representation'' on a show that was already nine years old, despite managing to be misogynistic. So now, we have characters are extremely unpopular like Claire Novak, Jody Mills, Donna Whatshername and even Mary Winchester. The spinoff for these inadequate females bombed due to lack of ratings. The show invested time, resources, money and effort into a spin-off that failed, because you said something stupid that made them look bad. The day they figure it out, you will leave the show with a reputation of being problematic. And word travels in Hollywood.

You overestimate your knowledge

You tend to speak up for a lot of different people. Usually I would admire that, because it is a sign of inclusiveness - not a bad trait to have. You, however, are very heavy handed with it. And you speak about subjects like you know them. You have an inadequate knowledge of slash fiction and yet you speak about it and you speak wrong. I have already done an article on that subject. You speak about feminism and misogyny and women's rights which makes me livid, because as I previously pointed out, you say the wrong things. And as a women, I would prefer to speak up for myself. I don't need a voice box speaking incorrectly for me.

You also speak about LGBT issues. LGBT teens who make up a small part of your already small fanbase, like that. After all, they are kids and they don't know any better. Grown ups, are generally, getting irritated. Because if you wanted these people to have rights, you will let them speak instead of speaking for them. Right now, only you and your destiel fans have a voice on the subject of LGBT, and collectively, you do a lot of damage to that community. Non-destiel fans are constantly fighting off destiel fans because of their ''deep'', stereotypical and damaging analysis of Dean's sexuality. They are becoming dissatisfied, but because you are not a mainstream actor and a household name, you fly just under the radar. The day GLAAD releases an official statement about you and your fans, you are not going to like it. Neither is CW.

You don't control your termites

In the past year and a half, your destiel fans have:

verbally bashed Jensen Ackles on Twitter

sent him a death threat

threatened to burn down his house

threatened to poison his beer so his brewery will shut down

smeared J2's reputation over a harmless joke they made at Nolacon [yep, those were your fans - their profile pictures and names gave them away]

were planning to hire a plane so that they could fly the words ''Pedowitz sucks'' outside Mark Pedowitz's office

threatened to kidnap Jared's children

slandered Jared by saying that Jared abuses his wife, whilst pretending to be her number one fan on Instagram

They only have one motivation for doing this: YOU.

And its not because they love you so much. Its because you overindulged something that was essentially a harmless pastime, you have turned them into junkies and you are their only dealer. The day you switch off their juice with finality, you will see a very ugly side of these termites, who are eating away at the foundations of Supernatural.

Because you over spoke about destiel, these troublemakers are now the majority of your fans. Outside of destiel, they have no interest in you. The Misha-led con recently didn't do very well, did it? Due to fragmentation you have lost many fans, and mishandling of your product caused you to use all the others. How many fans do you have left? Less that 80 000. That is my estimation. Those are the majority of the fans who petitioned for Wayward Daughters. The standard audience didn't give a hoot about that stupid project. Why did the shippers care so much? Because Wayward Daughters was a fan-backed project. The fans made it happen. They assumed that if they could succeed in that, then maybe they could make destiel canon too. For them, destiel is endgame.

Supernatural as a total audience of 3 million. Less that 80 000, is not an impressive number. Unfortunately 80 000 are still inaccurate, because this was not a ''landlocked'' survey. It was done via the Internet, which means that fans from all over the world could vote. So they don't fall under the category of the 3 million viewers who tune into Supernatural in America, every week. You fans are not Supernatural's core audience. You did that to yourself. These fans are also mostly teens. That is why they are so loud compared to other fan subsections. They have no mortgages to pay. They don't have to face rush hour traffic and they can fixate on destiel without much interruption. And since they are kids, they understand social media better than you and I. So they know how to use their resources.

I want to point out though, that not all destiel fans are problematic. Some are civil and level headed. I feel sorry for them because their reputation is tarnished due to the majority. And an ok ship, that they enjoy, is ruined.

The only thing that is your saving grace, for many fragmented fans is your anti-Trump stance. I hate him too, but I also hate Hillary. She is no better than him. However, even that is baffling because if you are brave enough to tweet and irritate Trump, who is unfortunately your President, why don't you have the courage to deal with your fans, in defense of your co-stars and the show that has employed you for ten years. Especially when these fans are mostly children. So you are not afraid of President Trump, but little girls scare you? Because my vantage point, I can see that this doesn't make you look good.

You used to be one of my favorites amongst the additional cast, until I got fragmented out of your circle. I even liked destiel, until it turned into a vile beast. You are now one person, that I cant write a slash story for. Because you have made it difficult for me to like you.

I thank you for your time, Mr Collins, and I hope some of what I said, gets through to you.

Sincerely

An ex-Misha Fan

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your-dietician · 3 years

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NBA conference finals winners and losers: Chris Paul earns his moment; Trae Young arrives; Injuries ruin fun

New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/nba/nba-conference-finals-winners-and-losers-chris-paul-earns-his-moment-trae-young-arrives-injuries-ruin-fun/

NBA conference finals winners and losers: Chris Paul earns his moment; Trae Young arrives; Injuries ruin fun

It’s been an arduous journey with plenty of basketball casualties, but we’ve finally reached the 2021 NBA Finals. With Saturday’s 118-107 Game 6 win over the Atlanta Hawks, the Milwaukee Bucks earned the right to play the Phoenix Suns for the NBA championship, starting on Tuesday.

The Bucks will make their first Finals appearance since 1974, with their only title coming in 1971, while the Suns last made the Finals in 1993 and have never won an NBA championship. Needless to say, one of these fan bases is going to be absolutely jubilant in a couple of weeks.

Before we move on to the Finals, however, let’s take a quick look back at an entertaining, intriguing pair of conference finals matchups and designate some winners and losers.

Probably the biggest story of the postseason, Paul will make the first NBA Finals appearance of his 16-year, Hall of Fame career after a masterful clinching game against the Los Angeles Clippers in which he scored 31 of his 41 points in the second half. Paul’s legacy isn’t in doubt given his career numbers and accomplishments, but a championship would at least bump him up a couple of rungs on the all-time hierarchies.

Paul’s journey is all the more remarkable when you remember that the Houston Rockets had to give up multiple first-round picks in the trade with the Oklahoma City Thunder in exchange for Russell Westbrook. Just as his career was supposed to be on the downslide, Paul turned in two All-NBA seasons and now has a chance to be the best player on a championship team at the age of 36.

Loser: Superstar health

The point has been belabored to death, but it bears repeating. Kawhi Leonard missed the entire conference finals. Chris Paul, Trae Young and Giannis Antetokounmpo all missed multiple games. Devin Booker played with a broken nose for the majority of the series. It’s not a good year to be an NBA superstar. Fortunately, we still got a couple of entertaining conference finals series, but let’s hope that Giannis can get healthy and that everyone else stays in top physical form for the Finals.

Given Antetokounmpo’s offensive limitations in the halfcourt, Middleton has been the Bucks’ closer in many high-leverage games over the past few seasons. After a relatively subpar first four games of the series, Middleton put his stamp on Games 5 and 6 as Milwaukee wrapped up a Finals berth. He came up clutch when it mattered the most, scoring 20 points in the fourth quarter of Game 3 and 23 points in the third quarter of Game 6, which created the necessary distance to close out the series.

Games 1-4

21.0

41.8%

22.9%

Games 5 & 6

29.0

47.6%

37.5%

Middleton has been an All-Star for two of the past three seasons, and will join Team USA at the Olympics for the first time this summer. It will be great for casual fans to get to see him playing on the NBA’s biggest stage.

Winner: Monty Williams

After enduring a tumultuous NBA coaching career and suffering unspeakable tragedy with the 2016 death of his wife, Ingrid, Williams let all of his emotions come pouring out after the Suns clinched their Finals berth against the Clippers. Williams and Paul embracing on the sideline in the waning moments of Game 6 will be one of the lasting images of this postseason.

“It’s just authentic. That’s what I felt like doing. I’m not into cool. I just felt like hugging him,” said Williams, who coached Paul in New Orleans during the 2010-11 season. “I think his parents were right behind us and he was emotional. I felt for him.”

Your Paul George playoff slander no longer has a place in the NBA vernacular. George had dazzling, clutch moments even before Kawhi Leonard went down, but he went to another level in closing out the Jazz and into the conference finals against the Suns. Just as it appeared as if he was running out of gas due to being the Clippers’ main playmaker for the entire series, George let loose for a playoff career-high 41 points on 15-for-20 shooting to help his team temporarily avoid elimination on the road.

George has taken a lot of criticism over the past few seasons, both warranted and unwarranted, for his postseason play. Asked whether he feels he faces unfair scrutiny during the playoffs, George didn’t hold back.

“I do. And it’s the honest truth. It’s a fact,” George said after the Game 5 win over Phoenix. “But I can’t worry about that. It comes with the job, I guess. But it is what it is.”

Loser: J.J. Watt

Newest Arizona Cardinal JJ Watt hasn’t been shy about showing his support for the Suns this postseason. He’s also been ardent in his fandom for his hometown Milwaukee Bucks. Now he’s going to have to choose, and while you could look at that situation as him being a winner, either way, we’re not that naive.

We all know whichever side he doesn’t root for is going to label him a bandwagon fan and send hate DMs his way on every social media platform available. Sigh. At least it was fun while it lasted, J.J.

Winner: Mike Budenholzer

It’s not much of a secret: Mike Budenholzer was clinging to his job like a cat on a ledge heading into the postseason. If Kevin Durant’s shoes were about two sizes smaller, Budenholzer might be seeking new employment as we speak. But he made it to the conference finals, where he coached a strong series and presumably earned some security as the Bucks’ head coach. One of his biggest moves — starting Bobby Portis in place of Giannis Antetokounmpo during Games 5 and 6 — paid dividends for the Bucks in terms of energy and rebounding, and putting Brook Lopez closer to the basket in Antetokounmpo’s absence led to a 33-point performance in Game 5. The discussions about his longevity could all be resurrected if the Bucks lose in the Finals but, for now, it appears Budenholzer has re-earned his job with the Bucks.

Loser: Lame NBA arguments

“This doesn’t count, everybody got hurt!” “Who wants to watch these small market teams?” “There’s not enough star power in the Finals!” We are not here for these terrible arguments heading into the NBA Finals. The basketball has been great, the existing stars have been phenomenal and new stars have emerged. The Bucks and Suns have fully earned their spots, so let’s not waste any more breath talking about how they’re not worthy because you think they had it “easier” than your team did. Thanks.

Winner: Trae Young

Young’s unbelievable playoff debut came to an inauspicious end due to a freak injury, but he provided one of the signature performances of this postseason with a 48-point, 11-assist, seven-rebound outburst in a 116-113 Game 1 win over the Bucks to kick off the Eastern Conference finals. He did it with typical Trae Young flair, throwing an off-the-backboard lob to John Collins, then hitting the Bucks with the “shimmy heard round the world” before swishing a wide-open 3-pointer late in the third quarter.

At just 22 years old, this likely won’t be Young’s last big playoff run. That Game 1 spectacle is what fans and analysts will look back on as the moment he arrived on the postseason stage, and it sure was fun to watch it live.

You hate to call Huerter a loser after all he did for this team during the postseason, but he had a rough conference finals. He shot just 34 percent from the field and went 10-for-38 (26 percent) from 3-point range against the Bucks after shooting 48 percent from the field and 40 percent from 3-point range in the playoffs prior to the series. Not only did he struggle offensively, but he also became a frequent target of Khris Middleton and Jrue Holiday, who consistently bullied their way to the basket. Huerter was a huge part of the Hawks’ success this postseason, but the conference finals weren’t his brightest moment.

You can’t say much more about Jackson, who re-signed with the Clippers three weeks before the season started after not getting more lucrative offers on the free-agent market. After Leonard’s injury, Jackson was the second-best player on the Clippers during the postseason and performed consistently throughout the conference finals, averaging 20.3 points, 4.3 rebounds and 3.7 assists on 46/37/80 shooting splits while playing nearly 38 minutes per game. It’s safe to say the Clippers wouldn’t have made their first-ever conference finals appearance, or won two games once they got there, without Jackson, who expressed his gratitude toward the franchise and his teammates.

“This city makes me feel at home. This organization welcoming me. My quirks, my strengths, my weaknesses. I’m not here today without this team,” Jackson said after the Clippers were eliminated by the Suns. “I’m not still playing without this team. I thank them for everything. In my heart this will forever be a special year.”

Beverley soured a phenomenal conference finals performance on both ends of the court by committing one of the most classless acts you’ll witness on an NBA court in this day and age. For reasons that are still unclear, Beverley violently shoved Chris Paul in the back with two hands late in the fourth quarter of Game 6 as the contest was getting away from the Clippers.

Earlier in the same game, the TV announcers were discussing how Beverley toes the line between aggression and recklessness, and this behavior clearly went too far. To his credit, Beverley took to Twitter to apologize to Paul the next day.

Beverley earned a one-game suspension for his first game of the 2021-22 regular season as a result of his actions.

We don’t know who will win the title, but we do know that Torrey Craig will be eligible for a ring either way. Craig played 18 games with the Bucks this season before being traded to the Suns in exchange for cash considerations. Craig wasn’t particularly productive with Milwaukee, and the acquisition of PJ Tucker was going to push him out of the rotation anyway. It was a win-win, as Craig has thrived in his role in Phoenix and become a valuable part of the team’s postseason run, hitting 44 percent of his 3-pointers in 12.6 minutes per game while playing stout defense.

Craig can refuse the ring if the Suns lose, as center Anderson Varejao did after the 2016 Finals. Varejao played in the Finals as a member of the Golden State Warriors, but had been on the Cleveland Cavaliers earlier that season and was therefore eligible for a championship ring. After famously coming back from a 3-1 deficit to beat the Warriors, the Cavs could have voted to give Varejao a ring, but he preemptively squashed the idea by saying he wouldn’t accept it if offered. Craig is hoping he won’t be forced to make such a decision.

When the Clippers traded Lou Williams for Rajon Rondo before the trade deadline, they were hoping that Playoff Rondo might walk through the door. Well, if he did, it was a revolving door. Rondo played a total of 47 minutes in the conference finals, only seeing the floor in three of the six games. He averaged 5.3 points and 3.7 assists, which aren’t bad numbers given the minutes he played, but he was consistently deficient trying to defend Suns guards Chris Paul, Devin Booker and Cameron Payne, which contributed to keeping Rondo off the court. Last postseason, Rondo was one of the key reasons the Los Angeles Lakers won the championship. This time around, he could help his L.A. team in the same way.

Coming off an Achilles injury, Reddish was thrown right into the fire as he made his playoff debut in Game 2 of the conference finals. Despite being on a “minutes limit,” Reddish clearly established himself as an important rotation piece for the Hawks on both ends of the floor. He scored in double-figures in three of the four games in which he played, including 21 points and a career-high-tying six 3-pointers in Game 6. He also showed his defensive prowess by taking turns on Middleton and Holiday when Atlanta was having trouble slowing them down.

Reddish is just 21 years old and has shown tremendous potential as a two-way wing. He also holds an interesting place in NBA history, as he was the player the Hawks drafted with the pick they received from the Dallas Mavericks in the Luka Doncic-Trae Young swap. Hawks coach Nate McMillan said he “sees a lot of Paul George” in Reddish, and if he gets anywhere close to that in the next few years, given the level that Young has already reached, then Atlanta might be able to say they won that trade — something that seemed inconceivable just a few months ago.

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