#god remember when I used to watch real adult tv and not just whatever fun teen drama Netflix threw at me

[2ndwind]

World of Memory: A Personal YGO Retrospective

(I don't fancy myself a writer, but these thoughts just poured out of me. This is for me, more than anything. But if anyone reads it, I hope it's amusing enough.)

I must've been in the second grade when Yu-Gi-Oh came to the US.

I remember all the boys in my class trading cards and challenging one another to duels. I remember gazing wistfully at the checkout of every major supermarket chain, pleading with my parents to buy some cards. When they refused, I decided to make my own fantasy trading cards! Using graph paper! But I quickly learned how hard it was not only to create the cards but also to design mechanics that people would actually want to play.

I remember my parents surprising me that fateful Christmas of 2002 with the original Starter Deck Yugi. Even though 90% of the monsters were weak and vanilla, the smell of the freshly unwrapped cards was CRACK. Better yet, I was finally cool enough to hang out with the boys. Well, I didn't actually play the game very much with people other than my sister, and eventually, the school administration banned trading cards altogether. But it was endlessly fun to talk about. I even went to China one year and bought a TON of fake YGO cards to flaunt and trade with the other kids. Yes, we were all kids cheating other kids.

I remember my heart absolutely racing in anticipation of watching the show on Kids WB, and the crushing disappointment of turning on the TV just a moment too late (I'm reminding myself that Netflix didn't exist back then). The visual style was just so striking, so much cooler than Pokémon's. The plot felt so much more serious. And don't even get me started on the characters. I was literally head-over-heels in love with a Nameless Pharaoh. I was a Revolutionshipper before shipping was even a thing. It's pretty obvious from my Tumblr archive lol.

I remember the first fanart I made, which was me trying to copy the cover of the Starter Deck Yugi instruction manual. It was the hardest thing I'd ever drawn up to that point, and I specifically colored Yugi's eyes gray. Because people didn't have purple eyes, of course. I wish I held onto that drawing because it sparked something in me. Maybe it was my obsession with ancient Egypt, which predated my obsession with YGO. Maybe it was my frustration with my drawing skills. Whatever it was, it would stay with me for a long time. Beyond classmates paying me in change to draw their favorite monsters. Even beyond my fairly brief stint posting YGO fanart to DeviantArt (yikes).

I remember finding the original manga at Barnes & Noble and feeling very confused. Why didn't Yugi have a nose? Where was Duel Monsters? Wait, are people actually dying?? These were the questions I asked myself as I learned what manga actually was. Subsequently, I would devour every copy of the manga and even Monthly Shonen Jump that I could get my hands on. In that way, YGO actually became a gateway to several other manga/anime series. It was a gateway to my now lifelong appreciation of Japanese culture as a whole.

20 years! 20 WHOLE YEARS after my first love of YGO, I can look back and laugh at how much money I spent on the TCG and manga. I can cringe at the silly fanficcy stories locked up in my head and the overly sentimental (or just straight-up copying) fanart I drew. I can, as an adult, appreciate the themes, but also be more critical of certain elements (the whole Doma Arc, how the series portrays women, the ancient Egyptians themselves, the clear references to the occult...etc.).

YGO shaped me into who I am right now: a designer who dabbles in fanart, an avid Egyptology nerd, an appreciator of animation and sequential art, and even an aspiring developer of a card-based game (my grad school thesis! For real). And as much as I sometimes weary of this dumpster-fire world, I still thank God that I was born at a time when I could experience the original YGO and grow up alongside it.

With all these fond memories of YGO, you can imagine my utter shock and sadness when I learned of Kazuki Takahashi's passing. It's even more surreal because I'm still following the man, himself, on Instagram. I hope he truly knew the depth of so many people's love for him and his work. And I hope that, one day, as the endless ages roll on, I'll find him and thank him, myself. For now, this rambling and a few pieces of art will have to do. Rest in peace, Sensei.

#retrospective #rambles #ygo #kazuki takahashi #personal writing

[cupcakeb]

Top 10 female characters — except I’m indecisive as fuck so it’s more, like, ~12

tagged by @carladuquette ☺️

Villanelle/Oksana Astankova and Eve Polastri — Killing Eve (no I can’t choose one or the other)

Marnie Michaels — Girls

Madeline Martha Mackenzie — Big Little Lies

Moira — The Handmaid’s Tale

Lorelai Gilmore — Gilmore Girls

Jenny Humphrey — Gossip Girl

Fleabag — Fleabag

Alexis Rose — Schitt’s Creek

Olivia Pope — Scandal

All the clones — Orphan Black

#tag games #yes it took me literal years to do this ugh I love tags I’m just not in a tumblr mood #god remember when I used to watch real adult tv and not just whatever fun teen drama Netflix threw at me #(I left off like 400 other characters) #and tumblr sucks aka I can’t replace the Villanelle gif with one of both of them

[the-modernmary]

to be enough || aaron hotchner x gn!reader

Summary: During a movie night with your boyfriend Aaron, you accidentally stumbled onto his old wedding video, and it makes you wonder if you could ever compete with his first love?

A/N: This was an anonymous request, thank you SO MUCH for sending this in!! It’s my first request and it was so much fun to write!! I love soft Hotch so, so much. I’m sorry this took so long to get out. I was sick on and off for like two weeks straight, it was a whole thing. I hope you like this!!

masterlist || read on ao3

“I’ll make popcorn and open the wine, you pick the movie. We’ll meet back on the couch in ten minutes,” Aaron said quickly as he pressed a kiss to your cheek before making his way to his kitchen.

  You giggled at your boyfriend’s eagerness as soon as he opened the door to his apartment. Truth be told, you couldn’t blame him, though. It was rare that the two of you ever really got the chance to just hang out at his apartment. Whenever Aaron was home, he liked to spend as much free time with his son as possible, which you completely understood. So between spending time with Jack and Aaron being away on cases, you lived for these small moments of alone time and domesticity. 

  “You might regret letting me pick the movie, my love,” you called to him jokingly as you sat down in front of his TV, looking for where the remote was hiding. “I am very loyal to my early 2000’s chick flicks.”

  The sound of Aaron’s laughter floating through his apartment made your heart swell. He had never been the tough, FBI unit chief around you, but he was also rarely so carefree and light. There was always a shield around him, especially with the way he would carefully choose his words so as to not give away too much of himself. He was always so guarded and unwavering.

  Aaron poked his head out of the kitchen, hair falling in his eyes. “In the interest of honesty, I’m fully planning on moving this to the bedroom before we even get halfway through the movie,” he admitted, his voice carrying even over the sound of popcorn in the microwave.

You giggled again and shook your head fondly, unable to stop the smile spread across your face at his words. Seeing him be so playful was like a gift — always a surprise, but never unwelcome. You lived for those small glimpses of the man you knew he was.

  Aaron went back to choosing the perfect movie night wine and you settled on the couch, turning on the TV and ready to pick out the goofiest, most feel-good movie you could find. Before you could pull Netflix up, however, the DVD that was already in the television began playing.

  The film was grainy and the camera work was shaky at best, so you weren’t sure exactly what you were watching at first. There was a church in the background and men dressed in nice suits. Kids dressed in their Sunday best ran around in the grass. The camera panned over to a couple who were clearly getting married, going by the big white dress the woman was wearing.

  The camera zoomed in on the couple and your heart dropped to your stomach, because there, right in the center of the screen was Aaron. It was a much younger version of him, of course, probably law school, but it was definitely him. 

  Oh god, this was his wedding video. Which meant that the beautiful, blushing bride wrapped in his arms and making him throw his head back in laughter was Haley.

  Aaron had told you about Haley and everything that had happened between the two of them right up to her murder pretty early on in your relationship with him, but then it was never really mentioned again. But you had heard the whispers on nights out with his team, listened to them all gossip amongst themselves about how “I never thought Hotch was ever going to move on?” .

  Despite every logical bone in your body screaming at you to change the film before Aaron came back into the living room, you couldn’t help but watch in morbid fascination. The Aaron on the screen was so different from the man you had come to love.

  You watched as the film Aaron spun Haley in circles and peppered her entire face in kisses. The entire time, they never once stopped touching each other, even if it was something as simple as holding each other’s hands. Aaron kept glancing over at Haley with the biggest heart eyes you had ever seen, and it was nothing like the way Aaron had ever looked at you. Even when the couple was supposed to be paying attention to the people giving speeches around them, Haley and Aaron kept sneaking glances at each other, mouthing “I love you” like it was the only thing they could think to say.

  Aaron looked so happy and so free and it was so unlike the man in the other room. In the year and a half you had been dating him, you had never seen Aaron with a smile so big. He never gave you PDA so freely, and it wasn’t something you realized you even wanted until you saw him do it with somebody else. Suddenly, you wanted to feel young and reckless and dizzy in love the way he looked back in the film.

  It was unfair to ask him to live every day with you feeling like it was his wedding day, and you knew it. Still, something stirred inside of you that made you crave for Aaron to look at you like that, even just once.

  What you had with Aaron now was safe and a certifiable “adult” relationship. Not to say it wasn’t nice, and there was plenty of passion and fun in it. All of your friends constantly expressed how envious they were that you had found somebody who was so stable yet still unpredictable and could sweep you off your feet with romantic dates under the stars. Being with Aaron felt like home for you, and you had always thought that he felt the same, although now you weren’t sure. It had never occurred to you that Aaron may not have ever really gotten over his first love.

  The microwave beeped, signaling that the popcorn was done and that Aaron would be back in the living room at any second, and you quickly switched the TV to Netflix, clicking whatever movie popped up first, not even bothering to look at the title. 

  Just in time, too, because not long after, Aaron made his way over to the couch, precariously carrying a bowl of popcorn, two wine glasses, and a bottle of a sweet red wine that had become a go-to for you both. He generally preferred red wine, but you hated the dryness of it and basically only drank sweet, dessert wines, so when the two of you found this one, it had seemed like fate. Most of your relationship with him felt like fate, honestly.

  You forced yourself not to think about the fact that Aaron was happily drinking white wine in the wedding video.

  “Either the definition of ‘chick flick’ has changed drastically,” Aaron started, plopping down next to you. “Or Mad Max is very different from what I remember.”

  “I decided to change it up, put on a movie neither of us will be invested in,” you lied, desperately fighting to keep your voice even. “That way we can move right into the bedroom portion of the night.”

  “I like the way you think, sweetheart,” he chuckled, dropping a kiss to the top of your head. His thigh was pressed against yours, but even then, he felt a million miles away from you.

  It was unfair to get so worked up over this whole wedding video thing, and you knew that. His time with Haley had ended long before he had even met you, and logically, you knew that people could fall in love multiple times. Still, that didn’t quell the anxiety that was bubbling in your stomach, making you queasy.

  Why was he even watching that video, anyway? Did he often sit right there on the very couch you were cuddling with him on and rewatch the happiest day of his life? After a date with you, did he ever come home conflicted about his own emotions and feeling guilty for moving on, and go down memory lane to remind himself who his real true love was? 

  You kept thinking about how giddy he had looked in that video, and how easy it had seemed for him to be with her. And Haley… God, how could you compete?

  She was stunning, no doubt about it, with her blonde hair and bright eyes that shined, even through shitty 90’s video camera quality. The pink on her soft-looking lips only seemed to make Aaron want to kiss them more and more, maybe to see if he could smudge her lipstick. It never once budged, though, because of course it didn’t. She seemed too perfect to have faded lipstick on her wedding day. She had floated across the makeshift dance floor, like a fucking Disney princess leaving a trail of fairy dust and sunshine everywhere she went. Everything about her seemed soft and kind and good, all things you had never once associated with yourself.

  It was no surprise that Aaron had decided he was going to marry her from the first time he saw her, as he had said in his vows. She was everything you could have ever wanted to be, and clearly, she was everything Aaron had ever wanted.

  Aaron’s voice snapped you out of your rapid descent into crippling insecurity. “I can hear you thinking from here, honey.”

  You took a long sip of your wine, avoiding his piercing gaze. “I’m just concentrating on the movie,” you lied.

  “The movie you picked specifically so that we didn’t have to pay attention?” he retorted, eyebrows raised. Really, you should have known better than to try and give him such a blatant lie. Aaron reached over you to grab the remote and paused the movie, placing his hand lightly on your knee. “What’s going on?”

  How could you even explain what you were feeling? It definitely wasn’t jealousy, although you almost wished it was. At least with jealousy, you could push it to the side as an awful, gross feeling that comes from years of internalized misogyny and being told that other women are inherently competition for the attention of men. You could deal with that feeling.

  But it wasn’t that at all. Despite Aaron’s obvious devotion to her, you found it hard (and a little twisted, if you were being completely honest) to be jealous of a woman who was violently murdered in her own home in front of her young child. Besides, jealousy would imply that you and Haley were on somewhat equal ground, which you so clearly weren’t. 

  Haley was his high school sweetheart, the love of his life, the woman he had chosen to have children with, and you…

  Well, at one point you thought you could have been that, too, but now you were faced with the fear that you were nothing more than a person to fill the hole in his heart that Haley had left. Even worse, however, was the sinking feeling that you weren’t sure if you were ever going to be enough to fill it completely. 

  “It’s stupid,” you stuttered out, avoiding Aaron’s eyes, which were so full of concern. That was the worst part. It would be one thing if Aaron didn’t love you, but he did love you. Just not in the way he loved her. “Don’t worry about me.”

  “It’s not stupid if it’s bothering you.”

  “I—” You cut yourself off with a sigh and shifted on the couch so that you were facing him. “Am I enough for you?”

  Aaron looked about as taken aback by your question as you felt. You hadn’t meant to burst through the gate with that particular insecurity.

  “Are you enough for me?” he repeated slowly, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, like the question didn’t make any sense. In all honesty, it probably didn’t. “If you mean ‘am I happy with you’, then yes. Incredibly. Happier than I’ve been in a long time.”

  That should have made you feel better, but it wasn’t the answer you were looking for. You absentmindedly picked at a loose thread on your sweater. “I saw your wedding video,” you admitted shamefully. It felt like you were a little kid getting caught with your hand in the cookie jar. “And, I don’t know… You looked so happy and so… alive with her. That’s a once-in-a-lifetime love, Aaron. I’m never going to be able to be that for you.”

  Aaron’s frown deepened, and for a moment you were worried that he was going to get angry at you for watching the video. Maybe you had tainted that one happy memory for him. But the lines on his face softened just a bit and he covered your hand with both of his.

  “Have you always felt like this?” he asked cautiously, attempting to keep all emotion off his face. “Like you’re not… enough?”

  You shrugged. “Sometimes. If I think about it too much. Especially when we first started dating. But never this intense. I guess since I had only heard stories of her, it was almost like she didn’t exist? But now that I’ve seen her and how you looked at her… I love you so much and I want you to be happy, but I’m scared I can’t be that for you. I’m sorry if I’ve crossed a line, but this has been eating me up from the inside for a while now and I—”

  “Hey, hey, hey,” Aaron cut you off mid-ramble, and you took a shuddering breath. Guilt was written all over him, which made you want to crawl into a hole and never be heard from again. “Have I done anything to make you think I’m unhappy?”

  “No, of course not! You’ve been nothing but wonderful. But I’m not Haley. I can’t make you as happy as she made you. And maybe this is selfish of me, but it hurts to know that you don’t love me the way you loved her.”

  Aaron’s frown deepened, but he still held on tightly to your hand. “I didn’t think you would want me to,” he said, and now it was your turn to be confused.

  You could practically see the gears turning in Aaron’s mind as he tried to find the right words to verbalize the floodgate of emotions that had just opened. Being vulnerable and open about his feelings wasn’t something he was very comfortable with, and it definitely didn't come easy for him. The fact that he was trying and willing gave you some comfort.

  “What I mean to say is…” he backtracked. “You’re right. You’re not Haley and the way I loved her is different from the way I love you. I love you differently because you’re different. And I’m different now, too. But different doesn’t mean less, and it never has. I would never want you to think that you’re just some consolation prize.”

  He was looking at you with such intensity and sincerity that you could have cried. “It’s just that when I realized you had been rewatching your wedding, I kept thinking that maybe she was your one love,” you explained nervously. “I don’t know what that leaves me.”

  Aaron took your hand that he was holding and moved it so that it rested on his chest and you could feel his heartbeat. “My love isn’t finite. I’m sorry if I made you feel that way.”

  You melted into his touch, and it was like the sun came peeking through the storm clouds. He didn’t have the exact same expression that 25-year-old him did on the wedding video, but it was something close. Maybe even something more. It was warm and inviting and felt like coming home after a long day. 

  “You’ve been nothing but the picture-perfect boyfriend,” you assured. “This is all me and my own insecurities. I saw that you had been watching the video and I just… spiraled, I guess.”

  Aaron mindlessly rubbed his thumb back and forth on your hand. “I should probably explain why I was watching it, then.”

  “God, no, you don’t owe me any explanations for what you—”

  “I was showing Jack,” Aaron interrupted, his voice soft. “He doesn’t remember her that much, and he definitely doesn’t remember when we were married. Most of his memories are of fighting or divorced parents. I wanted to show him that his parents loved each other.”

  Your face went hot as embarrassment spread through you. “Wow, that makes perfect sense and I feel like an idiot,” you breathed. “I’m sorry.”

  Aaron pressed a chaste kiss to your lips as he stood up from the couch. “You’re not an idiot, and you have nothing to be sorry for,” he promised. “Come on, let’s get changed into something a little nicer.”

  You looked down in confusion as your movie night outfit. “Why?”

  A mischievous glint flashed in Aaron’s eyes as he bent down and gave you another kiss, one much less chaste than the one before. “Because,” he mumbled against your lips. “I’m going to take you on a date and show you just how much I love you.”

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner x y/n #criminal minds #my writing

[atlafan]

The Real Him - One Shot

a/n: I’m not sure where this came from...a lot of this is sort of how I feel about writing, and reading, and how my brain works???? Hope you enjoy cause it’s fun! Book Writer!Harry x Y/N (not proofread) 

Words: 9.6K

Warnings: Fluff, wee bit of angst, and smut

Books weren’t things Y/N found interesting. She hated reading the assigned books in high school for whatever English classes she had to take. She often would just read what she needed on Sparknotes, and that was enough. Then, in college, even if she wanted to read for leisure, she didn’t have the time. She had to read articles and academic journals constantly. By the time she was done for the day, the last thing she wanted to do was read.

Now, as a young adult living in the city, she noticed her anxiety was always worse at night. She lived alone in a little studio apartment, it had a wonderful view. She would watch TV or scroll on her phone until she fell asleep, but the screens were too much for her eyes. She knew it wasn’t good for her. Much to her friends’ shock, she texted them asking them for book recommendations. Y/N didn’t want to think too hard, she didn’t like scary stories, but she also liked a little bit of world building and romance. Fuck, if there was anything she loved, it was a good romance. Her friends told her about this young author they discovered whose stories were enthralling.

She took their word for it, and ordered one of his books off his website. He was self-published, which she found to be interesting. How good could he be if a major publication didn’t want him? She trusted her friends’ opinions though, so she went with it. He had this series called, The Unicorn in the Farmer’s Pool, that they raved about. She told herself she’d start with the first one and see how it goes. Sometimes Y/N had a hard time concentrating to even read a book, so she didn’t want to buy too many.

The title of the book itself was odd, but when she read the description she understood. Apparently, it was about this young woman, new to town, who was going for a walk with her younger sister, and one day they come across this beautiful old home and large farm. There was a pool in the back with one of those big unicorn floats, which they both found odd. They see the farmer outside, and the woman inquires about it. He explains that it’s his daughter’s. He and his wife were divorced, and she moved out to the city. Unfortunately, she passed away, so his little girl came home to live with him.

It was a certified slow burn, so when it came in the mail, Y/N couldn’t wait to get her hands on it. There was only one picture of the author, Harry Styles, on his website. The book, however, had a lovely picture of him on it. He even named his publication company after himself, trademarking HES Books. He was handsome, there was no denying that.

“Alright, let’s see how well this guy knows how to write thing from the perspective of a woman.” She says as she settles into her bed with the book.

For the first time in a long time, Y/N found a book that she just couldn’t put down. Sure, she passed out with it on her chest, but she’d get right back to it the next night. She was ripping through it. Her heart would race anytime the farmer and the woman had a scene together. She cried when he spoke about his divorce, and how he never slept knowing his daughter was so far away. He’d never wish his ex-wife ill, but he felt like it was fate to have his daughter home. He’d give her anything she wanted, even a giant unicorn float for the pool. Something she couldn’t have in the city. His daughter would paint his nails glittery colors, and he didn’t give a shit what anyone else thought of it. Y/N could feel her heart pounding as the woman slowly fell for him. They became fast friends but it was clear they wanted more, but they were both so scared.

“Oh, you son of a bitch.” She says to herself when she gets to the end of the book, it was a cliffhanger. They hadn’t even gotten together yet. They were caught in a rain storm, about to kiss, but they were interrupted. “Goddammit.” She groans and grabs her laptop to buy the rest of the series. “Welp, Mr. Styles, you now own my ass, I hope you’re happy.” She sticks her tongue out at his picture on his website.

By the time she finished the third book, she was inconsolable. It thrilling, but she knew it couldn’t be the end for the two who were now so in love with each other. She also couldn’t believe how well written their love scenes were, a little shocked there was a small dash of smut. She looked on his website and saw he was set to release the fourth and final book of the series soon, and there would be a big release for it. He would do a reading and signing. Y/N texted her friends and they all agreed they needed to go. They still couldn’t believe how much Y/N liked the series. It consumed her soul, she couldn’t get enough. She even bought his other standalone novels to read until the release.

Eliza: hey! HES just released the first book on audio, and he narrates it! Should hold us over until the release ;)  

Y/N: holy fucking shit! Literally about to go download it, thanks!!!

Now this was a way to fall asleep, she thought. She plugged her earbuds into her phone, turned her light off, and hit play. She gasps the second she hears his voice.

“He’s British?!” She says to herself. “Dear god.”

His voice was deep and sultry, and sounded incredibly crisp through the audio. Each night for the rest of that week, she fell asleep to the sound of Harry’s voice; it was euphoric. She felt sort of weird for becoming as big of a fan of him that she was. It was like she was in high school again having a crush on some unattainable celebrity. She couldn’t even talk about him to anyone at work. It was like this big secret between her and her friends. Instead of listening to music in her office, she started listening to interviews or podcasts he was involved in. Anything to just get a better understanding for who he was or how his mind worked. She found that he was incredibly private, only tweeting or posting on Instagram from promotional purposes. A PR person most likely running the sites for him.

“Okay, I think I’m obsessed with him, like, it’s bad.” She tells her friends at brunch one Saturday morning. They would all try their best to get together a couple times a month.

“Welcome to the dark side.” Eliza says.

“I knew if we didn’t push you that you’d come around at some point to ask us for a book rec.” Melinda says.

“You could have just showed me his picture, he’s so handsome! I can’t wait to go to the signing. I wonder what type of suit he’ll wear. Maybe all black?”

“I heard he’s into florals lately.” Eliza says. “I’m glad we got our tickets when we did, it’s going to be packed.”

“Yeah, like, at least we’ll have seats for the reading.” Melinda says.

“I can’t believe we’re going to hear his voice in person. That audio book? Oh my god.” She pretends to fan herself. “I’ve been enjoying his other novels too. He has such a way with words, I can’t remember the last time I actually enjoyed a book this much. Maybe The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants?” She chuckles.

“Didn’t you read that in high school?!” Eliza laughs.

“Yeah!” Y/N laughs, and Melinda joins in. “I fucking hate reading. I wonder if he’ll ever sell the rights and have it turned into a movie or TV series.”

“People have been begging him. He said maybe once the fourth book has been out for a bit. He didn’t want to feel pressured, like, you know how with Game of Thrones the books didn’t come out fast enough for the series?” Melinda says.

“Oh yeah, that makes sense. I think a TV show would be good. Then they could take their time with it. The only thing is I can’t picture someone playing the farmer other than him.” Y/N sighs.

“Agreed.” Eliza says. “I can really only see him.”

“So, how are we dressing for the signing? I don’t wanna look desperate by dressing up too much.” Melinda says.

“Melinda…” Y/N starts chuckling. “You have a girlfriend.”

“I’m aware.” She swats a hand at Y/N. “But damn, Harry is too fine.”

//

Y/N curls the ends of her hair on the day of the signing. It was finally here, and she couldn’t be more excited. She found a cute yellow top to wear with some high waist jeans. She does some simple makeup, but makes sure to have her eyes pop. The rules were that people could only bring one book with them, so she grabs the first in the Unicorn series. She fully intended to buy the new book as well, and they said he would sign all new purchases too.

She meets Melinda and Eliza outside the bookstore where it would all be happening. They get in line to buy their new books, and head to their seats. They were able to snag tickets for the second row. He would be reading the first few chapters of the first book, and then would spend the rest of the time signing books.

“I’m so excited.” Y/N whispers to both of her friends.

A man comes out shortly to check the crowd of people waiting, and soon it’s announced that Harry would be coming out. Everyone stands up and claps for him. He was wearing a sleek black suit, and his hair was pushed back off his face. He looked bashful as he smiled out to everyone, and stood at the podium provided. Everyone sits back down as he clears his throat.

“Thank you all so much for being here. Whether you’re a new fan or if you’ve been with me for years, I appreciate your support. It feels surreal for this series to be over. I’ve loved these characters so much, and when I finished the final edits, it felt weird saying goodbye. I also want to say thanks for all the support with the first audio book. I fully intend to do one for the rest, it just takes a lot of time and editing, so hold tight for me, alright?” The crowd giggles, and his dimple grows deeper. He takes a sip of the water provided, and opens the book. “Let’s get started shall we?” He looks up at the audience who was waiting patiently. He makes eye contact with Y/N. It’s brief, but he looked at her…or at least she told herself he did.

His voice was just as smooth in person as it was on the audio. Y/N was swooning, barely paying attention to the words, but more so watching the way his lips moved. The way he’d lick his lips after getting a sip of water, and watching his Adam’s apple bob up and down. It all felt like a dream. He ended up reading five chapters instead of three, as a treat, until his manager came out to remind him to wrap it up.

“Right, well, I’ve been told I’m done speaking.” He chuckles. “I just need about ten minutes and I’ll be able to sign all your books. Thanks so much!”

He leaves as everyone claps for him again. Everyone gets in line and waits for him to return. There was a table waiting for him to sit at and a ton of markers.

“I wonder how long we’ll get with him. Like, a minute, right?” Eliza asks.

“Make every second count.” Y/N says.

“I’m gonna try to take a selfie.” Melinda says. “Then I’ll really remember it forever.”

As the girls got closer to the front of the line, Y/N felt herself getting nervous, and her palms were starting to sweat. She tries to wipe them on her jeans before she gets to him.

“Hello, love.” He smiles at her. “Whatcha bring f’me?”

“Huh?” She was so taken aback.

“Well, I know you didn’t come here to have me sign a body part…unless you did.” He shrugs. “Although, I don’t think my manager would appreciate that.” He winks at her and it makes her giggle.

“I have the first back, and the newest one.” She hands them both to him. “I have to say, I’m not really a big reader, but this really drew me in. I think I’ve fallen in love with reading for the first time in my life.”

“That’s like…I mean…wow, what a compliment, thanks.” He signs both of the books. “What’s your name?”

“Y/N.”

“Y/N.” He repeats as he continues to leave a nice note in both of her books. “You know pictures aren’t allowed, but if you turn around and happen to take a selfie they can’t stop you.” He points to the few guards.

Y/N turns around and takes a selfie with Harry. She turns back around and chuckles as she takes her books back.

“Thank you so much. I can’t wait for the next audio books.”

“You liked the first one?”

“Loved it.”

“So, it wasn’t weird listening to me for that long?”

“Not at all…” She starts blushing. “Your voice is sort of, um, soothing…I have a lot of anxiety at night, and, well, reading, and evening listening has helped me sleep a lot better. So, thanks again.” She smiles at him and he smiles back.

He wished he could hug her. He looks back at his manager, who just sighs at him and nods. Harry stands up from the table and walks around. Before she knew it, his arms were being wrapped around her. She got a whiff of his cologne, and she swore it was her new favorite smell in the world. She barely got a chance to put her hands on him before his manager said it was enough and Harry needed to get back to it.

“Sorry, that was just so endearing.” He lets go of her and sits back down. “Thanks for your support.”

Y/N steps aside and looks at her friends who were waiting for her to finish up. She looks back at Harry who was already talking to the next person. She sighs, knowing she was long forgotten already.

“Oh my god, I took a picture of him hugging you.” Eliza says. “What was it like? All he did was shake my hand.”

“He smelled so good.” Y/N whines. “Girls, let’s go out for drinks tonight. I need to get some energy out.”

“Great idea! We can drink and then dance the night away.” Melinda says. “What did he write in your books?”

“I don’t wanna look yet, I wanna save it.” Y/N smiles and holds her books close to her.

//

After grabbing dinner and dropping their books off at Y/N’s place, they all head to their favorite dance bar. They all get their drinks and stand near the bar to drink them. Y/N was happily sucking on her straw, swaying along to the fast beat of the music.

“Look, they actually roped off the VIP section.” Eliza points out. Y/N and Melinda turn to look.

“I wonder who’s here. Once in a while someone cool shows up.” Melinda says.

The group in the VIP section erupts into laughter, and the girls’ eyes grow wide. Harry was standing up from the booth, looking much more casual. He still had his dress pants and button up on, but his sleeves were pushed up, revealing his tattoos. He strides up to the bar as he shakes his head back at his friends. He brushes right by the girls, bumping into Y/N, causing her to spill her drink.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry, love.” He says to her, and then he looks her up and down. “Do I know you?” He slurs slightly.

“Um…we…we met earlier today. You signed my books.”

“I signed your what?!” The music was really loud, he must have thought she said something else.

“Books, books!” She really enunciates the k sound.

“Oh!” He bursts out laughing, and puts a hand on her shoulder. “I was gonna say, that sorta thing isn’t really my style. What are you drinking, I’ll get you a new one.”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that. There’s still plenty in here.”

“Don’t be silly, I feel terrible. In fact,” He looks at Melinda and Eliza, and then to the bar tender. “Their next round’s on me. I also need another bottle of Patron for my table.”

“Coming right up!”

“Lost a bet with ‘em.” He rolls his eyes. “So the next bottle’s on me.” He shrugs.

“We’ll bring it over to you.” The bar tender says as she puts up three new drinks for you and your friends.

“You really didn’t have to do that.”

“S’the least I can do. Your support is the only reason why I can afford what I have. I should buy your drinks all night.” He smirks.

“Y/N.” Melinds grabs her shoulders and whispers in her ear. “Go for it, bitch, go for it. He’s hitting on you. We’ll be over there.”

She lets Y/N go and drags Eliza with her over to another part of the bar. Y/N grabs her drink and smiles at Harry.

“Your name’s Y/N, right?”

“You must have seen hundreds of people today, how’d you remember?”

“I’m really good with names.” He grins. “Do you want to join me and my friends?”

“What?!”

“Come on, seems like your friends are busy anyways.” He nods over to Melinda and Eliza where Melinda was working as a wing-man for Eliza. “They’re bringing over the Patron, you’ll love it.” He grabs her wrist and brings her over. One of the body guards raises his eyebrows. “I’m baacckk, let us in Mike.” Mike lifts the rope up and lets Harry and Y/N in. “Everyone this is Y/N, she’s got to be one of my biggest fans, so she’s joining us.” He pulls her down into the booth with him and puts his arm around her shoulders.

He was drunk, this was very clear. No one seemed bothered by her presence. Everyone was just happy to have refills for their drinks. Harry takes a shot of the Patron along with everyone else as Y/N sips on her drink. She felt bad, Eliza had to be a bigger fan of Harry, or at least she had been a fan longer…

“So, how’d you know he’d be here?” Harry’s manager, Jeff, asks.

“I didn’t.” She blushes. “My friends and I come here all the time.”

“Right, like we haven’t heard that one before.” Jeff smirks. “Some of you fangirls-“

“Oi! Don’t make fun, she’s cool.” Harry defends her.

“I can prove I’ve been here plenty of times.” Y/N takes her phone out and shows them her Facebook page. “There, you can see how many times I’ve checked in here. I only live a block away, so this tends to be the spot.”

“See, Jess, this is the spot.” Harry smirks, and knocks back another shot. “We’re being rude, here.” He slides a shot over to her. “Have as much as you like.”

“That’s okay, I have this.” She points to her glass.

“Oh, I knew I liked you, you’re so nice.” He pulls her a little closer to him. “But really, if you want any, you can have as much as you want, okay?”

“Thanks.”

Y/N sort of just sits there and tries to listen as each person talks, but the music was so loud, and she was itching to dance, especially now that she had a couple of drinks in her. She was drumming her fingers mindlessly on the table.

“Do you want to dance?” He whispers in her ear. A shiver goes up her spine. She looks up at him and nods. “Alright, let’s hit it then.”

She gets out of the booth and he quickly follows her out to the dance floor. At first it’s just light and playful, he keeps one hand in hers, but keeps a respectable distance. If Y/N was dancing with her friends right now she’d probably be popping her ass no problem. She sort of wished they were still around. She couldn’t remember the last time she danced with a guy. She looks at him and feels a little bold, so she hooks an arm around his neck and dances close to him. His hands move to her hips as she essentially grinds on his thigh. When the next song starts, she turns around to grind her ass against his pelvis. He presses forward against her and she can tell he’s very happy to be dancing with her.

“You said your place was only a block away?” He says into her ear, and she nods. “Wanna head there?”

She stops dancing and turns around to face him.

“Are you serious?” She raises an eyebrow at him.

“Sorry, too forward?”

“No…I just…um…yeah, let’s go back to mine.”

He smiles and throws his arm around her shoulders. He looks over at Jeff who was still sitting with their friends. He waves off to him, and heads out side with Y/N. Harry whistles for a cab, and one pulls up almost right away. They both get into the backseat, and Y/N gives the driver her address. Harry rubs circles into her shoulder. She rests her hand on his knee, as her leg shakes with nerves.

“You alright, love?”

“Mhm, yeah.” She doesn’t look at him.

“No need to be nervous, babe, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

She looks up at him now and smiles. She wanted to do everything with him. It was like every fantasy she had was coming to life. She had dreams about this, but never thought it would come true. The cab pulls up in front of Y/N’s building and they both get out of the cab. She keys into the front door and she leads him to the elevator.

“I’m surprised you’re not exhausted, must be draining to meet so many people.”

“Caught a second wind.” He winks at her. She giggles as they get off at her floor.

She leads him inside as she flips the lights on.

“It’s just a studio.”

“It’s nice, just enough space. You’ve got a great view.” He says as he walks over to the window.

“Yeah, I got really lucky.”

“Mind if I pull the curtains?”

“Not at all.”

She watches the muscles in his back flex as he reaches to pull the curtains closed. He turns to face her and walks over to where she is. He cups one of her cheeks and she leans into his touch.

“I have to be honest, I don’t usually do this.” He says.

“Do what? Hook up with a girl from a bar?” She smirks.

“No, hook up with a fan…” He sighs. “But what you said to me earlier about your anxiety and how my books have helped you, it stuck with me all day. I’m really glad I ran back into you. I got kinda nervous when you didn’t message me.”

“What? Why would I have?”

“I wrote my number in your book.” He lets go of her and steps back. “You didn’t read my notes?”

“No, I…I was saving them for when I was feeling down.” She admits, a little embarrassed. “Why did you put your number in it?”

“In case you ever needed someone to talk to…if you ever got sick of listening to the same story over and over. It was a little impulsive, but no one’s ever said anything like that to me before.”

“I’m surprised by that.”

“Usually people just tell me that they enjoyed it, or they try to flirt or something. It’s usually pretty hollow.” He shrugs. “But you…” He takes her hands in his. “Well…if you noticed, I didn’t really hug anyone else.”

“I did notice. You made me feel really special, Harry.”

“I’d like to keep making you feel that way…”

He releases her hands, and she wraps her arms around his neck. Her hands slide up through his curls, and she gets up on her tip toes while his arms wrap around her waist, pulling her close. His lips brush over hers, and she pulls his face closer to hers to deepen the kiss. She smiles against his lips which makes him smile and pull back.

“What is it?”

“I just…I can’t believe this is happening…” She presses her hips closer to his.

“You’ve thought about this before, with me?”

She nods her head yes and he smirks.

“Is that weird?” She asks, cheeks heating up from embarrassment.

“Who am I to judge what helps someone fall asleep at night?” His voice was low now, eyes darker than they were moments before.

Maybe this wasn’t something either of them should be doing while inebriated. But from lack of better judgement they start kissing again. His hands slide down to cup her ass, and his large hands give her a squeeze. She groans into his mouth, giving him the perfect excuse to lick into her. Her tongue molds to his, and she starts pushing him to walk back towards her bed. He happily lets her lead the way.

The back of his calves hit the bed, and he almost loses his balance. He sits down and brings her with him so she’s straddling his lap. Lips only breaking for a moment to get some air until they’re on each other again. Her hands lace through his hair and he groans when she tugs on him. His lips move to her jaw and then to just under her ear. She gasps when she feels him suck on the tender skin. Her hips roll down over his, and he smirks against her. He licks over the spot he was sucking on, and goes back for more. She grinds herself against him, feeling his bulge press up against where she needs it most. His lips move back to hers so he can nip at her bottom lip before looking at her.

“You want this?” He asks.

“Wouldn’t have said yes to coming back here if I didn’t.”

“You could have changed your mind between the bar and now.” He tucks some loose strands of hair behind her hair. “I meant what I said earlier, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

“I want to, do you?”

“I certainly didn’t change my mind.”

She smiles and leans in to kiss him again before getting off him. She reaches behind him quickly to snag one of her throw pillows to put on the floor. She sits up on her knees before him and reaches for his for the button on his dress pants. She looks up at him as he widens his legs for her. He wasn’t expecting a blow job, but he wasn’t one to turn it down. She pops the button and undoes his zipper. She reaches into his pants and palms him through his boxers first. His palms were flat on the bed, his arms keeping him up, but he can’t help but let his head fall back from her touch.

“Harry, look at me.”

He immediately does as she says so he can make eye contact with her.

“Is this okay? Can I take it out?”

“Yeah, please.”

She smiles and tugs his pants and boxers down slightly, he lifts his hips up to help her. He unbuttons his shirt while his dick slaps up against his lower stomach. She gazes up at him. Once his shirt is off, she can’t help but look over all his tattoos.

“You’re so…pretty.” She chuckles.

“Not as pretty as you.” He runs his hands through her hair, giving her a little encouragement to get started.

She blushes as her eyes fall to his hard cock, tip swollen and ready to go. She licks her right hand and gives him a few pumps first. He grunts as he watches her. She licks a stripe up from his base to his tip before she wraps her lips around him. His eyes flutter closed for a second, but he didn’t want to miss anything so he does his best to keep his eyes open to watch her work on him. She already had small droplets of spit rolling down her chin. Sloppy, he thinks to himself and he smirks. She sinks a little further down on him, testing herself to see how much she can take. He thrusts up slightly to meet her halfway and she gags on him, needing to pop off for a moment.

“Sorry, been a while.” She mumbles, and gets back on him.

“No worries, doing great, love.”

He helps keep her hair back as she starts to bob up and down on him. Her warm mouth felt so fucking good around him. She swallows around him before really hollowing her cheeks to suck on him. Her mouth moves up to his tip so she can lick away at his slit. She wraps a hand around him to pump him as she does this.

“Baby, baby, hold on.” He pants, and moves her face away from him. She looks up at him with big, innocent eyes that were slightly watery now. “I’ll come if you keep doing that.” He sounded almost out of the breath. She nods and stands up. His hands grips her hips and then slide to the button on her own jeans. “You’re sure?”

“Yes.” She says, taking off her shirt. He looks up at her and kisses on her chest as he undoes her pants.

He yanks them down her legs. He smiles at her mismatched set of underwear. She had worn a white bra with her yellow shirt, and a simple pair of blue panties with her jeans.

“I didn’t think, um, I would be…it was a girl’s night, and-“

“Do you really think I care about your underwear not matching?” He raises an eyebrow at her as he smirks.

She smiles and rests her hands on his shoulders as he kisses on her lower tummy. He stands up to kick his pants away, and lets her get on the bed. She lays on her back, propping herself up with her elbows. He crawls onto the bed and settles between her legs. His lips find hers as he grinds himself against her covered center. She bites her bottom lip, just wanting her underwear gone. He reaches behind her to unhook her bra. After a few seconds of fumbling he gets it, and watches the bra loosen around her. She pushes it off her shoulders, and tosses it to the ground. His hands cup her full breasts immediately. He kneads them and tweaks her nipples. She grinds her hips up towards his as they continue to move against each other. He dips his head down to kiss on her chest, and he rolls a nipple between his teeth. He works his way down her body and slides her underwear down her legs, tossing them aside where he feels like. She parts her legs for him.

He dips his down and licks from her center to her clit. He does this slowly but with precision. Her hips buck up towards him, encouraging him to keep going, so he does. He licks all around her until his lips are around her throbbing clit. He nibbles and sucks and flicks his tongue while his fingers explore her folds. Her hands were in his hair. She kept thinking she was going to wake up. Any minute now she would snap out of her dream. She would pinch her eyes closed and expect to see the morning sun creeping through her windows, but not this time. When she opened her eyes there he was, head between her legs, lapping away at her. The clouds covering the moon and night sky. He had her whimpering and tugging at his hair. He wanted her to come, but not yet, just get her to the brink. She pouts at him when he lifts his head. He licks his lips and smiles at her.

“Got any rubbers?”

“Mhm, in the bathroom, I can-“

“I got it, just tell me where.”

“The box in the cabinet below the sink.”

He pecks her lips before going into her little bathroom. He smirked to himself wondering how he might shower the next morning. He was taller than the showerhead. He bends down to open up the cabinet and spots the box of condoms. It was opened, but not many were missing. Not the he was one to judge. Harry hooked up a lot. He grabs a couple, just in case they feel like getting frisky again later on, and heads back out. He rips the foil packet open and slides it on over his length. She bites her bottom lip in anticipation.

“Tell me something,” He starts as he gets back on the bed, between her legs, hovering over her body. “When you had me in your thoughts was it ever like this?”

He rubs his tip against her clit, getting her to moan out. He pushes into her entrance but doesn’t go much further until he gets his answer. His eyebrows were raised, looking at her.

“This is usually the part when I’d wake up.” She whispers. “Before anything good could really happen.” She cups his cheek and runs her thumb over his cheekbone. “Please.”

He kisses her as he pushes the rest of the way inside her. They both groan. She was so wet, even with the condom on, it still felt amazing. He was nice and snug inside her. He moves slowly at first to not hurt her. He hooks an arm under one of her legs to bring it up a little higher. He wanted to get in as deep as possible. She clutches at his shoulders as he drives it in.

“Oh my god.” She gasps as his tip brushes her g-spot. “Jesus Christ.” She grits her teeth.

“Ever had anyone like this before?” He says into her ear.

“Never this deep, shit.”

He sits up and puts both of her legs over his shoulders. His fingers press bruises into her thighs as he holds onto her. She looks up at him as her mouth falls open. He was ramming into her and it felt so good to fuck like this. She didn’t want to be treated delicately. What he was doing was amazing, but her clit was missing the friction, so her hand slides down to rub at it.

“Fuck.” He breathes as he watches her touch herself. He lets go of one of her thighs and moves her hand aside so he can rub it for her. Her head rolls back the second she feels his thumb on her.

“Just like that.” She pants. “Don’t stop.”

He grunts his response as he continues to fuck her. He could feel her tightening around his cock and he knew she was close. He rubs her a little faster, and watches as her body contorts under his.

“Let go, come on, show me how you do it, Y/N.”

That pushes her over the edge. She cries out as she comes around him. He rubs her still, but slows his pace to help her through it. She tightens around him again as she comes down from her bliss. He drops her legs and pulls out. He sits up against her headboard and pulls her into his lap. He doesn’t have her face him, though, he has her sit on him facing away. Her head rolls back against his shoulder once she sinks down on him. She uses her knees to push herself up and down on his cock. He bites down on her shoulder, licks up to just under her ear to suck on the tender skin again. His hands find her bouncing breasts, and he kneads them.

“Harry.” She groans.

“Feels good, love?”

“So good.” She turns her head and sticks her tongue out slightly so he’ll kiss her. His tongue meets hers and they practically slobber all over each other as her pace quickens on him.

His hands slide down to her hips to help her. He thrusts up into her to get into a rhythm. He could feel his orgasm bubbling at the base of his spine.

“Fuck, oh my god.” He moans, which makes her moan. She tightens around him. He wanted her to come again, to come with him, so he rubs her clit while she continues to bounce him.

“Shit, fuck, Harry!”

They come at the same time, both of them crying out form the intensity. He gives her a second to catch her breath before he lifts her off of him. She gets up and quickly walks to the bathroom to clean herself up. He goes in after her to rid himself of the condom. She was about to throw on a t-shirt when he comes back out.

“Don’t bother.” He smirks.

“What do you mean?”

“It’ll just come off again.”

“Oh.” She blushes and puts it back into her dresser.

He gets on the bed with her and pulls her close to his chest. His fingers run up and down her back lightly, causing goosebumps to raise on her skin. She rests one of her legs on top of his, and wraps her arm around his torso. She wasn’t sure if she’d have the energy to fuck him again so soon, especially when the rhythm of his heart beat was lulling her to sleep. Her eyes flutter closed. He looks down at her and smiles when he sees her lips parted. He kisses the top of her head, and slowly falls asleep himself.

//

The next morning, Y/N wakes up cozy, head stuffed into her pillow, blankets wrapped around her. It was darker than usual. Her eyes flutter open and see the rain falling down. She hears it tapping delicately against her windows. It was a normal Sunday morning, or it would have been if she hadn’t completely forgotten there was a warm body wrapped around her. She rolls over slowly not to disturb the stranger. She gasps to herself when she sees it really is Harry Styles, not just some guy that looked like him. She really took him home with her and she really fucked him. He pulls her closer to her and she sighs.

“Your bed’s comfy.” He mutters.

“Thanks, I’ve got one of those foam pads under the sheets. Makes a world of difference.”

She feels his chest rumble as he chuckles. She feels him press a soft kiss to her forehead before pulling away slightly.

“Mind if I grab a shower?”

“Not at all.” She smiles up at him. “If you don’t mind smelling like my fruity shampoo, that is.”

“You’re funny.” He chuckles again and stretches as he sits up. He rubs his eyes, and gets out of the bed. Y/N couldn’t help but ogle his naked body as he walks away. He pops his head out of the door frame to look at her. “Are you coming?”

“Oh…you wanted me to-“

“Obviously.” He scoffs. “Wouldn’t mind fucking you again, either.”

Normally she’d wrap herself in a blanket, but if he was going to be bold, then so was she. So she gets out of bed and struts over towards him. She brushes her teeth quickly as he uses some mouth wash. She gets the water in the shower going.

“Does that head detach? I don’t know if I can crouch for that long.” He laughs.

“Yeah, it comes right off, don’t worry.” She pulls back the curtain and they both get in.

She helps him wash up, scrubs her nails over his head as she washes out the shampoo, and once they’re both clean, he hoists her up against the wall, and kisses her. She was plenty wet for him, and he smiles against her as he slips a finger inside her.

“You were ready f’me, hm?”

“Guess so.” She nips at his bottom lip, which delights him.

“Mind if I just slip it in like this and pull out after?”

“That’s fine.” She smiles. “Wouldn’t mind actually being able to feel you.”

“Christ.” He groans, and then pushes his hard cock inside her. Her head rolls back against the tile as his lips attack to her throat.

It was a nice, passionate morning fuck. When they’re done she gets him a towel, and wraps one around herself. He watches as she runs around to make her bed back up. It was a small apartment, so any clutter just made it look even smaller. He grabs his phone out of his pants pocket, and sighs.

“Alright?” She asks, sitting on the edge of her bed. He comes to sit down next to her.

“Yeah, just a ton of missed calls and texts. Thought I made it pretty clear to Jeff I wouldn’t be coming back to the hotel last night.”

“Do you have a plane to catch or anything?”

“Not today, tomorrow though.”

She watches as he types away to respond to the dozen or so texts he had form various people.

“Would you like any coffee or anything? Juice?”

“Just a black coffee would be perfect if it’s not too much trouble, love.”

“Coming right up.”

His eyes flicker up to watch her bum and hips sway as she walks into the kitchen area. She fills up her Keurig to get his coffee going.

“No cream or sugar, just black?”

“Please.” He smiles. “Thanks.”

She nods and gets a mug down from her cabinet to place under the machine. She thinks he’s talking to her for a moment, but when she looks over she can see he’s on the phone.

“I’m not sure when I’ll be back. I’m well aware, thanks.” He sighs and shakes his head. “I’m allowed to go out and have some fun.” He crosses a leg over the other so he can rest his elbow on his thigh, propping his chin up with his palm. “She’s making me a cup of coffee, is that alright? No, I don’t just carry those in my back pocket…” He rolls his eyes. “I’ll take care of it. Alright, bye.”

She comes over to him with a mug for him, and one for herself. She added a bit of cream to hers. She just couldn’t do black coffee.

“Thank you so much, feel like I’m about to get a headache.” He says, taking the mug from her, smacking his lips after he takes a sip.

“I have some aspirin if you need some.”

“Caffeine should work just fine, but thank you.”

“So, uh, not that I was listening in or anything, just, small space and all, but what don’t you carry around in your back pocket?”

“Oh.” He chuckles. “An NDA, that’s all. Jeff’s gonna email one over to me any second I’m sure.”

“What do you need an NDA for?”

“It’s not for me, it’s for you.”  She looks at him deeply confused. “I’m a very private person, and not that I think you’re the type to go around spouting your business, it’s just, well, you’re a fan and…”

“You need me to sign an NDA so I won’t tell anyone we fucked?”

“Basically, yeah. Sorry if that makes things a little awkward. It’s just to keep my personal life personal, that’s all.” He takes another sip of the coffee. “This is really good, what brand is this?”

“Green Mountain Coffee…it comes from Vermont.”

“It’s delicious, I’ll have to look into it.” He smiles, although she can tell she’s starting to feel uneasy. She’s painfully aware that this was just a drunk hookup, a one night stand. “Are you alright?” He puts a hand on her knee.

“M’fine, just a bit groggy.” She sips her own coffee.

“Well, I’m starved, you’ve gotta be too, right? What a good place to grab some breakfast around here?” He stands up and starts looking for his clothes.

“Um…there’s a place right down the street.”

“We’ll have to take a cab unless you have a really big umbrella.” He smirks as he pulls his boxers on.

“Do I have to sign an agreement saying I won’t talk about breakfast too, or?”

Harry sighs as he pulls his pants on. She looks at him as she sips her coffee.

“Guess I’ll find out when I read the fine print.” She stands up and walks back over to her kitchen area. He follows her there with his mug and sticks it in the sink.

“Why is it such a big deal?”

“It’s not, I just…I mean…what do you think I’m going to do? Go onto a blog and spill every detail about last night? As if I could remember every little thing.” She scoffs and rinses out her mug.

“You easily could. You have to understand, sometimes when stories slip or people feel like they know things about you, it’s harder to get deals or make business decisions. I want to be taken seriously, so I don’t post personal things on social media, and I have the people I hook up with sign NDA’s.”

“Well, maybe I should have you sign one for me then.” She says, crossing her arms. He raises an eyebrow at her. “How do I know our night together won’t be inspiration for your next love scenes? You’re quite descriptive in your works. You must take from real life when you’re writing those things.”

“I’ll tell you what, I’ll text Jeff and have him email me two, one for each of us. I won’t talk about you and you won’t talk about me. Now, can we please go get some breakfast?”

“Why do you even want to go anywhere with me if you’re so scared of people finding out?” She walks over to her dresser to pick out an outfit she wouldn’t mind getting wet in the rain.

“It’s one thing to be seen with someone at a diner, it’s another to have what you’re like in the bedroom aired out to millions of people.”

“It’ll be obvious we slept together. My neck is littered with kiss marks.” She taps over one of the spots. He watches as she wriggles a pair of panties up her legs, and then a pair of jeans. “You’re also wearing your clothes from last night.” She tosses him his button up.

“I don’t suppose you have a large t-shirt I could throw on?”

“I’m sure I could find one.” She find a bra and t-shirt of her own, and then rummages through her pajama drawer for one of her larger bed shirts. “Here.” She hands him the shirt. He puts it on and looks down at it.

“Cute.” He smiles. “You can keep mine, and I’ll keep this one, how’s that sound?”

“Guess I’m just glad that’s not my favorite one.” She grabs her raincoat and umbrella. She furrows her brows and then remembers where her rubber boots on. “Could you order an uber or something?”

“Sure.”

They get down to the street, and head into the car he ordered. The diner was busy when they got there, but since it was just the two of them, they didn’t have to wait long to be seated. Harry’s phone pings with the email from Jeff.

“So…I just need to digitally sign it?”

“Mhm.” He hands his phone over to her so she can read over everything. He rests his chin on his palm. “Don’t think I’ve ever seen someone read over it so diligently before.”

“I’m a lawyer.” She mumbles.

“No shit.” He sits up, suddenly even more intrigued with her. “Good for you.”

“Well, I’m in law school, and I work as a para at a law firm, but I’m getting there.” She says as she uses her finger to sign her life away. “I’d like to read the one he sent to you for me.”

“Just swipe to the next email.”

She nods and looks it over. It was the same as her. She hands him back his phone and watches him sign it.

“I’d like both copies emailed over to me.”

“Alright, what’s your email?”

“I’ll put it in.” She takes his phone back and puts her information in, sending herself the copies. “There.” She crosses her arms. “Happy?”

“Yes, actually.”

A waitress comes over to them, and they both order scrambled eggs with bacon, potatoes, and toast. It’s quiet between them for a few moments. She looks out the window to watch the rain fall, and then looks back at him. He was twiddling his thumbs in his lap.

“Harry?”

“Yeah?” He looks up at her.

“What am I doing here with you? You could have easily slipped out this morning, even last night…”

“I’m not that kind of guy.”

“So…what is this, a consolation before we never see each other again?”

“No.”

“Then what is this?! I feel like I’m not even looking at a real person. I’ve wanted to meet you for so long, and I would have killed for the opportunity to sit down and have breakfast with you. I have so many questions about your work, and-“

“So, ask me.”

“What?”

“Ask me all your questions. What can I answer that I haven’t already in an interview? You wanna know my thought process? Where and what I get inspired by? How long it takes me to write a book, a chapter even? I only have bullshit answers, to be honest. I keep notes on my phone for when I get inspired, and then when I’m able to be at my computer I’ll type for hours without stopping. It’s like I blackout or something. It feels like I didn’t even take a second to blink. I’ll work on multiple projects at the same time too. I have three other books I’m currently working, all with completely different topics and characters. I can’t shut my brain off, ever. I don’t know why I’m like this. Even when I go on a vacation to unplug, I have to keep a notebook with me to write things down. I started writing because I just needed to get everything out of my head. I feel a huge sense of relief when I’m done with a piece so I can just move on from it. I had to start my own publication because my content was going to be put in the same category as Fifty Shades, and I didn’t want that. Luckily, Jeff went to school for PR, and he helped me out, and now he’s my manager. He’s the best there is, but sometimes it would be nice to fuck a pretty girl and take her to breakfast without having to worry about every little thing.”

Before Y/N can respond their food is brought over. They both thank the waitress. She picks her for up and plays with her potatoes before looking at him.

“Not to mention, said pretty girl told me how much my work means to her, how it helps her sleep at night. Fuck, I mean, I thought I was going to melt into a fucking puddle right there. My anxiety gets bad at night too, I knew exactly where you were coming from, babe. I can’t tell you how many nights I try to go to sleep and can’t, so I just get up and go back to my computer until I pass out in my chair.” He blinks at her, as she still says nothing. “Are you…not going to say anything?”

“I’m not sure what to say, I’m trying to take in everything you said and match it to the person you were yesterday at that signing. It’s an act, right? Your cool demeanor?”

“I have a stage presence for sure.” He sighs, and takes a bite of his bacon. “What am I gonna do, get up there and tell everyone that the fourth book took so long because I had to have surgery for carpal tunnel?”

“For someone who likes to be so private, you’re sure telling me a lot of personal things.”

“You signed something saying you wouldn’t discuss any of this, so I feel a little freer to explain myself. Have I totally ruined your perception of me? Is this a never meet your hero sort of moment?”

“Not at all.” She smiles. “You seem comfortable with me, which is nice. I like that I’m seeing this side of you, you’re more than just the suave guy I’ve seen in interviews, or listening to on podcasts. You’re a person, just like me.”

“Exactly, so you understand why I might want some privacy.”

“I do.” She nods and finally takes a bite of her food. “I’m sorry if I got a little pissy about it.”

“Don’t be, it’s always an awkward conversation to have.”

“So, how many women do you hook up with exactly? You’re making yourself sound like a player.” She chuckles.

“I mean…I’m a guy who has needs. I’m not gonna lie, I probably do it a little too much, but I don’t usually spend this much time with the person, or if I do…well…it’s not usually like this.”

“Why?”

“I wanted to actually have a conversation with you.” He shrugs. “You peaked my interest.”

“Clearly.” She smirks.

“At least I’ve never rubbed one out to the thought of a famous person.” He smirks back.

“Oh, I’m sorry, do you consider yourself famous?” She grins at him. “And I haven’t rubbed one out, it’s usually just a dream. Don’t flatter yourself, Harry.” She shakes her head.

“My bad, so I’ll just assume you get that wet for every guy you hook up with?”

Where was this conversation going, and why was it happening in such a public place? Was he trying to rile her up?

“I don’t think this is appropriate to talk about right now.” She whispers harshly.

He smirks and continues eating. They look at each other occasionally as they eat. The waitress comes over with the bill, and Harry throws some cash down on the table.

“Let me pay the tip at least.” She says, reaching for her purse.

“Don’t be silly, I put plenty down for the tip. I’ve got it.” He puts his hand over hers. “Seems like the rain’s stopped, wanna walk back?”

“Do you not need to be anywhere?”

“Nope.” He smiles. “Today’s my free day, isn’t that nice? I’ve got a plane to catch tomorrow morning, and that’s all I have to worry about. So, I’m more than happy to walk you back home.”

She nods and follows him out of the diner.

“So, do I only get your email, or do I get your number too?”

“Why, so you can hit me up whenever you’re in the city?”

“Precisely.” He nudges her as she laughs. “Come on, I gave you mine.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t even look…I would have been so embarrassed, you would have forgotten all about me. I don’t even know if I would have even had the courage to message you.”

“I wouldn’t have forgotten you.”

“Did you manager know you just gave your number out like that?”

“God no, he’d murder me.” Harry chuckles. “Jeff’s great, but he’s way too serious.”

“So, maybe I’ll message you sometime.”

“I prefer chatting on the phone, to be honest.”

“Why’s that?”

“Anyone can send a text, but a phone is, like, I don’t know, it’s romantic.”

“Romantic?”

“Yeah, like, a phone is something you really need to make time for.”

She pouts at him and looks at him with big eyes. They stop once they’re in front of her building.

“I come back to the city in two weeks, I really would like to see you again.”

“What are you coming back for?”

“Another signing. This one sold out, and I felt bad. I think anyone who wants to see me should.” He shrugs. “I wouldn’t have anything that I do if it weren’t for the people who supported me.”

“That’s sweet.” She smiles. “Okay, I guess we could see each other again.”

“Great, just make sure you call me, okay? Then I can call you, and we’ll just be two people calling each other sometimes.” He blushes.

“Why are you so romantic?” She laughs and wraps her arms around his waist.

“I wish I knew. It’s a blessing and a curse, I think.” He sighs and cups her cheeks. He leans in and kisses her, she happily kisses him back and pulls him closer.

“Do you, um, need to go back to your hotel now?”

“Not necessarily, what’d you have in mind?” He raises an eyebrow at her. She leans up and whispers in his ear, making his cheeks grow hotter. He looks at her, a little stunned. “I definitely have time for that.”

“I figured you would.” She winks at him and yanks him into her building.

She wasn’t ready to let go of him just yet. Everything still felt like a dream, only better. Even when Harry had to go off to his next signing, she slept better than she ever had. She called him late one night, much to his surprise, and they spoke for hours. She didn’t have to listen to the same words over and over to fall asleep, she had him, the real him.

#harry styles #harry styles one shot #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles y/n #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles smut

[miss-choco-chips]

Favorite color

Ever since he was born, his world was filled with colors, a beautiful rainbow at his fingers. He’d look down at them at night, or when his parent’s leaving made him want to cry, or when a horror story told by a classmate in the playground scared him half to death, and find comfort in their silky touch and bright hues.

He was seven when he learned the meaning behind them. And the blaring lack of red signaled the first, but not last, heartbreak of his life.

Blue, green, purple, black… and bright yellow. A teacher, a missed opportunity, a first love, life and death… and friendship. No eternal love for Tim, it seemed.

Well. He hadn’t really expected any different. Who would love him forever, when his own parents didn’t?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

He had forgotten it, and it escaped his notice for many years. Until one night, following Dick Grayson as he jumped from rooftop to rooftop, when he noticed his purple string moving in synch with him. Pointing towards his hero, the boy who had given him his very first hug that night at the circus. His First Love, his Not Meant to Be.

That night, Tim packed up early and went home. He just couldn’t stand the red uniform contrasting sharply with his purple thread.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

When Dick left, he thought maybe now he could go back to his old habits, to run the streets looking for flashes of the new robin without the baggage of avoiding to look at his own hand.

No such luck.

The green made a whole lot of sense when news of Jason’s death reached him, tough.

It wouldn't be the last night he’d cry himself to sleep, holding the frayed ends of his fated Almost.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Becoming Robin was both easy and painful. Comfortable, because the blue string pointing him towards Bruce meant this was always supposed to happen; heartbreaking, because it took a kid dying. Because Tim might not have a romantic soul mate, but his hands, that had made a green string break to grant him access to the blue path, were stained red nonetheless.

Wearing Robin’s red, with all the hurt and bad memories it carried, felt like a subpar punishment.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Meeting his Yellows almost passed his awareness. In the middle of a crisis, every adult missing, no mentor to guide him, he couldn’t exactly spare a thought for the kids looking shellshocked at him, each other and their hands.

After, when Young Justice was officially formed, he firmly avoided looking at Bart, Superboy and Wondergirl. Their eyes followed him, pleading, but he’d learned no good ever came from strings that weren’t red.

And the red in his soul wasn’t from love.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Despite himself and his best efforts, they grew closer. Life or death situations had that effect on people, after all.

His own reluctance, which had in turn provoqued Kon’s anger, Bart’s dejection and Cassie’s confusion, slowly began to crumble. He was helpless in the face of their unrelenting friendship.

The strings grew shinier, stronger, healthier, the yellow a stark contrast to frayed (dead) green, cold blue, distant purple. Scary black.

Tim still despised the rainbow in his fingers, but… he could maybe withstand the sparks of yellow he’d catch from the corner of his eye, knowing just who were at the other end.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It wasn’t exactly team training. Greta, Anita, Cissie, Slobo and the others didn’t join them, for whatever reason. It was always the four of them, leaning on and learning from each other.

When Kon’s strength frustrated him, when the world around him seemed to be made of bubbles and sea foam, Tim stayed late at night every weekend to help. Every spare moment directed towards coaching him, again and again, through exercises he had to come by himself (Clark was no big help, here), until exhaustion made his muscles tremble and Kon’s anger had burned out from frustration to soft acceptance that he just wasn’t like the rest. Until he could hold still and let Superboy trace the side of his jaw with a careful finger, and exchange proud little smiles when his face remained unbroken.

Bart being raised by video games had the expected outcome; he had little to no practical, day to day life knowledge. He was the closest living thing to a Looney Toon. Which was fun and good when crime fighting, his crazy ideas often saved their ass last minute, but unacceptable if integrating him into society was to be considered. So Tim would take him out, hand in hand so he didn’t forget himself and ran on his own, to leisurely stroll down busy streets, arcades, schools, libraries. Talk to people in parks and visit recreational centers, barter with street vendors and ask the little boy selling flowers on Jump Street how his mother is doing. Whatever Tim could think of that would soften Bart’s cultural shock.

In that regard, Cassie was a godsend. With her own attentive mentor, and raised like a normal girl until she obtained her powers, she was the most well balanced member on their team. Tim had started to feel a little restless (how can he help her, how can he convince her to stay…), when he noticed her frustrated, sad face whenever Donna was mentioned on Tv, when any reporter or older hero compared the two Wonder Girls. Familiar as he was with imposter syndrome, Tim would rest his arm around her shoulders and turn to the rest of the team, loudly reminding everyone to ‘speed up guys, Cassie here’s already done with her training routine’ or slump tiredly against her while complaining about ‘how immature they are, I can’t deal, thank God you’re here to remind me competent people do exist’.

It was familiar, to help them along. To nudge them forward and watch their backs as they went, firmly making their way towards being the awesome men and woman he knew they’d become. Lending a hand here and there, working on steading their foundations, so he’d be remembered fondly when they inevitably took off and went on with their lives.

He was used to that, to looking for ways his fated people would want him around. Being a good brother to Dick, an eager student to Bruce (a good mourner for Jason).

What he wasn’t used to was reciprocation, though.

Tim had learned how to fly from the best, from Dick Grayson himself.The boy with no powers that looked at gravity and laughed, sayed “thanks, but no”. But there were some things only a true meta could experience, ways to move his body just so, to take advantage of wind currents to either speed or slow his movements. Kon also visited him in Gotham, unknowing or uncaring about its meta restriction, risking pissing off Batman himself just to spend time with Tim.

There was Bart, kind, cute, friendly Bart, who would stop eating and playing around to drag Tim to the training grounds and run laps around him, as silently as he knew how. Making Tim used to fighting against someone quicker than him, lighter on their feet. To count incredibly soft steps even when they made no sound, and use other senses to pinpoint exactly where the next hit was going to come from. And after they were done, there was always a warm smile and some sweet treat (always different, as if Bart was determined to figure out Tim’s preferences by trial and mistake), the new knowledge and delicious prize worth the dirt in unmentionable places.

As stated before, Cassie was an absolute godsend. But it wasn’t just because she was easier to deal with than the rest. Or because she understood the pressure he had on his shoulders, being raised in the shadow of two incredibly renowned heroes. When Tim’s position as leader had been taken away (after Bruce’s plans for taking out the league became known, and ‘what if he has the same for us’), she took him aside. Hugging him, promising him the team’s anger was going to pass, that she could see why those contingencies might be necessary, that even if she was officially in charge, she’d always defer to him when it mattered. Her trust in him and his heart was unshakable, firm as the arm he’d put round her when self doubt arose its head.

(It wasn’t supposed to be this way; if they reciprocated, they didn’t owe him, and then how was he supposed to keep them close? To convince him to stay, to love the boy with loveless fate?)

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Jason was unexpected, but Tim couldn’t hold it against him. Even there, bleeding out in the Tower, he felt… at ease.

His predecessor was back. Bruce’s son was back. The prodigal Robin had returned, by some miracle. Tim’s shift had come to an end; even if he died here, he had succeeded in keeping Bruce sane, and now that the real deal was in town, Jason could take over and everything would go back as it should have been. Everyone (B, Dick, Babs, Alfred) would be happier. Maybe they’d mourn him, for a bit, but with such a joyous occasion as a beloved one returning home, it wasn’t like grief could stay for long.

Someone yelled, near. Warm hands shaking as they touched his face infinitely careful, small fingers intertwined with his in a very familiar hold, a strong and slender arm around his back as he’s being held in a half hug. Cries, pleas, demands.

And while nothingness claims Tim, drags him to a well of black, yellow still clings to his eyelids. A touch that keeps him warm even though unconsciousness is supposed to be so cold.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Death and life. Damian.

Tim can see the first one, what with all of the brat’s attempts to end him. It’s the second one that has him stumped.

He knows not all strings go both ways. His purple one, for example; even if Dick was Tim’s first love, everyone and their mother knew Babs’ was his. Dick had a string pointing towards Tim, but it was a mentor-student one. Same as the one he and Bruce shared. Jason, too; Tim’s side of the string was the green of Almost, while the former Robin’s color was black (Tim taking his place as Robin, and being the only one in the family offering his hand again and again despite his murderous actions, was in some poetic sense the death of an old role, and the birth of a new family dynamic).

Damian, though… Well. He was almost sure they had the same color for each other (how else to explain such dangerous rage), but really, unless the kid was willing to share, it was only suppositions for now.

His only comfort remained the three beams of light, of a yellow almost golden in its healthy shine.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

When Tim changed his suit following Conner’s death, everyone thought it was an homenage. A way to pay tribute to a hero that was his closest, dearest friend. A way to never forget (as if he could, ever, with the lifeless line of pale beige, once yellow, dangling from his twitching finger).

They weren’t wrong, but it wasn’t just that.

Red had always pained him, in a deep, almost forgotten place. A thorn on his side, scratching against his heart. For the longest part, yellow had filled him to the brim, until hurt and yearning had no place inside him. With Kon’s warmth missing, red bleed in the place between Cassie and Bart, despite their best efforts to close ranks and keep it out.

Their sad eyes followed him during the funeral, knowing what the color meant to him. Just how much he was hurting himself, right now. But, lost in their own grief, there was little to be done.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

By the time Tim got the call about Bart, he already knew.

He ignored the ringing phone, holding a sobbing Cassie in his arms, both desperately clutching at their only remaining yellow string.

Between the two of them, color like blood seeped.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Every so often, when Ra’s voice in his ear became too familiar for comfort, where lines draw in sand begane to erode and blur, he’d raise his hand, eyes locked on the three yellow strings, and watch as Cassie’s moved, disappearing end pointing always in her direction.

He was fairly sure that, wherever she was, she was doing the same. Reminding herself he was alive as well, hadn’t left her behind.

Her absence from his life was necessary, finding Bruce a priority, and the red of his new suit (his new name) was proof of just how deeply it all ran. But it didn’t mean he wasn’t yearning for her lighter color.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

They were back, and he was hiding.

He wanted to run to their arms, hug them and never let them out of his view, far from where he could protect them (keep them). He wanted Kon’s hand on his face, delicate despite his strength, un-trembling when Tim’s own would softly join it on his check and held it there; Bart’s fingers between his own, too steady and constant for the boy who didn’t know how to sit still; Cassie’s arm on his waist, his own on her back, as they shared the weight of the world in their shoulders.

And because he wanted so damn much, he couldn’t do it.

He was covered in red. His first love discarded him, his Almost died so Tim could have his Teacher, his Life and Death was so heavily focused on the last bit… his hands lacked red, but oh, how much he leaked of it in his soul.

He couldn’t let them die again, be stained by his twisted fate; even if it meant he could’t hold them close any longer.

Letting go was more painful than holding on, but he was used to it by now.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

They find him. Of course they do; even without Kon’s senses, they all have beams of gold pointing them towards him, like Dorothy’s yellow brick road.

Tim knew it, was ready for it. And as such, had prepared the words that would push them away, to where it was safer.

Or so he thought.

“We are not leaving you.”

“Who cares about fate? You are ours, Rob.”

“It’s been long enough, Tim. Time to come home, we are done waiting.”

He denies them, shakes despite his usual iron clad control over his body, heart wrenching painfully at their decided expressions.

“You don’t understand. I’m Red Robin now. I’m not… I’m no good for you.”

“I could literally snap your back with the flick of a finger, shut up with that ‘I’m dangerous’ bullshit.”

“Yeah, even Bart could be dangerous given the right circumstances, you aren’t the only one here to watch for. It doesn’t mean shit to us.”

‘

“That’s right, I- wait, what do you mean ‘even Bart?”

“Not the point, Imp.”

They don’t get it. He takes his mask off, wants to give them a good look at his eyes, to read his emotions there and finally realize what’s wrong about him.

“Almost all my strings have something to do with death, or were touched by it. Don’t you see it?” He raises his hand, despite knowing they can’t see his strings, only their own. “I have no red here, only blood. I can’t… I’m not safe to love. I’ll never be loved.”

Kon snaps, something he had rarely done since their Young Justice days, hands on Tim’s shoulders, seemingly torn between shaking him and pulling him close. The latter wins.

(As it always does)

“This is love, you idiot! WE love you!”

Tim chokes on something (saliva, his own breath, emotions). Gasps, tears coming to his eyes unbridled.

He feels two pairs of arms joining the first one, a cocoon of warmth and unconditional love forming around him.

Bart’s sad eyes watch Tim from under Kon’s hug. “I don’t have red either, Rob. Romantic, platonic, filial… who gives a fuck”, he shrugs, before hiding his face against the red of Tim’s uniform. Uncaring of all it represents for him or perhaps doing his best to defy it.

Cassie just holds them all in the circle of her own embrace, forehead to the back of Tim’s head. Her hold is the tightest, and he just realizes- she lost all of them, didn’t she? To death and grief, all too far to touch, and now that they’re back in her arms, there’s little chance of her ever letting go again.

“Love has more than one form, Tim.”

He shudders in the middle of this weirdly emotional dog pile, and thinks. About Bruce and Dick’s pride when they successfully taught him something new. Of Jason’s reluctant smile when Tim first tugged him along to some joined patrol, sneakily edging him closer to the family with every interaction. Of Damian, who would often look down at his own hands (and Tim would honestly kill someone to know just which color the young boy had for Tim) and then at him, with something like hope in his green eyes.

He thinks… yeah. And this one…

(He gives up, closing his eyes and snuggling deeper into Kon’s chest, knees buckling but staying up thanks to his three rays of sunlight holding him in place between them.)

This one’s shape might just be his favorite.

#my writting #core disaster week #day two #Red string of fate #tim drake #kon el kent #bart allen #cassie sandsmark #bruce wayne #dick grayson #damian wayne #jason todd #angst #you've been warned

[facepalming-since-chernobyl]

If you ever want to write a full account of your hospital stay, I'm so here for it. I want it all: the farts, the grannies, the fighting over windows, the other weirdos, why you want to murder the doctor and how your fam will help you get away with it, the works. Start writing while I grab the popcorn! 🍿

Ok, don’t remember what I have said here already, so I’ll give a full story plus some flashbacks from my childhood.

-I got 4 grannies in my room, the average age: 65+

-granny number one: ultra Catholic, made a cross on my forehead (I was so shocked, I didn’t say a shit, aside of screaming in my head – woman?! Covid restrictions?! Keep your distance?!), a farmer woman (one day she just said that when she wants a chicken soup, she goes outside, catches the chicken, chops the head and make a soup – the faces of the other grannies - PRICELESS), praying in weird moments, instead of sweat pants, wearing dress shirts and dress pants (and you know, we were doing physical exercises there???), loving dirty jokes and making them A LOT,

-granny number two – tiny old sweet lady (she was like 80 something years old?), usually sitting in the corner or on the balcony and praying silently, she was like Catholic kamikaze, she sometimes was sitting on the balcony and praying for FIVE HOURS, oh, and once shitted her pants

-granny number three – ex school director, Miss Ooooow, Ooooow, came with 2 suitcases and occupied ½ of the wardrobe (for example, I managed to put all my things in my night stand), was very surprised I came with so little clothes and was washing them, was crying when she had to wash her hair because she always goes to hairdresser…

-granny number four – on a wheelchair, my best pal, making her own cigarettes at evenings on the canteen (a place where the meals were served, close to the balcony), as much done with the other ladies as I was,

-our room were filled with weird Turkish soap operas (the first time they turned the television on some Mahmud wanted to kill some Bahar and the dialogues were so cringy I had to check if it was a real show and surprisingly it was). Every day after I was evacuating my ass to the canteen or to the balcony where I was reading (I’ve finished 19 books and my ass still hurts because of the fucking hard chairs).

-if it was not a Turkish soap opera, it was Polish News on the public channel (Imagine FOX news), so every fucking day when it was played, the traitors of Polishness and Polish tradition and the only good ruling party like me, were gathering in the canteen. We were like a few folks (me, the granny number 4 and some dude doing crosswords and having super high blood pressure, mostly because all dudes from his room were watching the news and agreeing with everything what was said there)

-food, examples

-so I was not eating too much, so granny number one made a cross on my forehead and blessed me, so I would eat more and have a strength to give birth to children – I shit you not

-when I said I don’t want children – they almost had a collective heart attack. I decided to not reveal my other social, religion and political opinions, because I would be strangled to death in my sleep by a rosary one night

-one day I was stupid too much and didn’t leave the room while they were watching Polish Fox News and while half listening to the bullshit I probably made a fuck-my-life-face. When they ask what I was thinking about, my, a fucking idiot, said that about the vanity of life. They almost got another collective heart attack and almost ran to the nurses, no idea why but whatever

-Granny number 3, was afraid of other people snoring, because she had problems with sleep. In the end she was the one who snored the loudest

-there was an opening/closing the windows war. Granny 1 had sick lungs and asthma and whatever so was always closing the window because she was getting pneumonia and oh my god, while Granny 3 had problems with breathing, was suffocating and oh my God, so she was always opening the window. Granny number 3 was always opening the window while other already left for the meals, while Granny number 1 was always returning first and complaining SOMEONE was trying to kill her with the cold air and closing the windows. HILAROUS stuff

-on the end of the first week I ACCIDENTALLY broke a small window that was situated on the top, a window that supposedly was not meant to be open, so for the next 2 weeks we had a window opened ALL the time. Don’t ask why no one called some dudes to fix it, I have no idea, but thanks to it I survived the nights full of symphonies of farts

-that one day they gave us beans for the dinner and boy, you can only imagine

-one day we got a meat chops with a crispy batter. If you added the batter on the bottom to the batter on the top of the meat, they were thicker than meat itself

-all soups tasted the same. One day they gave us a soup and I was SURE it was a pickled cucumber soup and I was AMAZED that they managed to make it without cucumbers. Then I have learnt it was a sorrel soup *sad music in the background*

-the grannies loved to motherhen me for some reason. For example, I was sitting politely in the canteen, reading another fucking book, when one of them came and said I should not read so much, it’s unhealthy and they are worried about me. I was blinking for 30 seconds, wondering if laughing like a mad hyena would make them having another collective heart attack. In the end I just mhm-ed and continued reading.

-later I have learnt they were behaving like that, because they thought I was in middle school…

-basically, I was the youngest person on the ward and some nurses and other patients felt sorry for me because I didn’t have anyone in my age to talk… and I was like… why the fuck I should have been feeling sad? I could read and NOT TALK??? Also, or reading or murdering the grannies with a plastic spoon in their sleep, so thank you very much, leave my ass alone.

-on one dinner I basically ate pasta with pepper, because the spinach, guys, the spinach was awful and I’m not going to traumatize you with the pic

-I had a deal with the crosswords dude during breakfasts and suppers – was giving him ham and cold meat, he was giving me jam

-the Granny number one was SLEEP SINGING one night

-two days per every week some farmer was coming and selling his vegetables and fruits. Guys, all patients were buying food there, for sure I was weeping while buying plums, apples and tomatoes.

-Granny number three was super annoying and acting like a bitch aka typical ex school director, because when she wanted to watch something in TV at night, she always did even if the others were upset, but when she wanted to go to sleep at 9 she owww owwww owwwwed and was turning the lights off. So, sometimes I was returning at 9 to the room and it was dark. And there were no night bedside lamps, so it meant you needed to go to sleep too. At fucking 9.

-the face of one dude who was eating with us on one table was always priceless every time when he was opening the boxes. It was a personification of a man who was done, crying inside and knowing he can’t escape

-the most traumatizing experience after my hip surgery was PEEING. The nurse brought me a bed pan and I needed to pee while laying on my back and it was weirdly difficult, maybe because the nurse was standing over me, talking to another patient. Also, I can’t imagine taking a shit while laying, but whatever. On one moment after like a minute me trying hard, she put a hand on my stomach and said, oh so hard. My face was probably a mix between: ==’ and O.O. But in the end I succeeded, yay…

-another traumatizing experience is measuring the temperature every morning around 6. You know, you are sleeping, but suddenly feel some movement, so you open your eyes and a nurse, wearing a mask is aiming a thermometer that looks like a gun at your forehead. Amazing feeling

-I talked with some dude who had the same surgery aka hip removal, but he was not sleeping so he herd everything, and said how blood was gushing all over the place and the surgeons and the nurse was bringing the artificial hips three times, because the surgeons were not sure if they are the good ones. FUN

-btw, the first time when I saw a dead body was in a hospital. There was a ward where one room was for children, the rest was for adults after accidents etc. Sometimes someone died and they were usually putting the dead body to the bathroom on the corridor (no toilets at the rooms, it was one of the two bathrooms for whole ward). They usually put an “out of service” paper on the door, but sometimes they forgot about it. So, one night, me, sleepy and yawning went to the toilet, opened the door and hellooooooooooo the end of my innocence.

-the most stressful experience from my childhood hospital stayings was “did you defecate yesterday”? Because if you didn’t for a few days an enema was waiting

#not sg #my fam #shitposting #hospital stories

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #457

“blue are the words i say and what i think  /  blue are the feelings that live inside of me”

Do you buy your lingerie at Victoria’s Secret? No. That shit is so overpriced and not for my size group. Would you ever use an online dating service? I never would again. Are you good at multitasking? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Have you ever eaten Frosted Mini Wheats? Ugh, those are so gross. What does your bikini look like? You think THIS bitch wears a bikini??????????????????????? Does age really matter in a relationship? To an extent, yes. How much does the last person you kissed mean to you? I honestly don't even know if I'd be here without her. Almost like magic, Sara popped back into my life right after I returned home from the hospital following my suicide attempt. She helped make recovery possible as a solid source of support. Do you use lotion? Not NEARLY enough. My skin is so dry; I need to. Do you believe in teenage love? I experienced it deeply and thoroughly, so yes. Have you ever sat on the roof of your house? No. Do you like Sublime? I like that one popular one of theirs. "Santaria" or whatever it's called? What’s your favorite movie genre? Paranormal horror, especially the "found footage" type. It's creepy to imagine it being actually real. Is there a celebrity that you’d be willing to have a one night stand with? If he was single? I know in my gut I would lmaooooo Do you want to live in your current town the rest of your life? OH MY GOD PLEASE NO If you found out today your best friend was gay what would you do? She's demisexual, so. She can like anybody. If you could get a pet for free today-what kind/what name? A tegu, because it wouldn't need an enclosure that I don't have. I'd let it free roam. God, I can only imagine Roman's reaction. How many people have you slept with? If you mean what I think you do by "slept," one. Do you ever wish you had a family business to become a part of? Not really. What’s the most gruesome way you could come up with to kill someone? Hunny, have you seen my dark RP????? The world best be glad I'm a pacifist lmfao Do you think anyone deserves to die that way? I don't believe in torture, so no. If you had to fight for survival, what would your weapon of choice be? A gun, I guess? I'd want something with range and that's quick. I wanted to say a bow and arrow, but preparing another arrow after shooting once could really cost you your life. Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans? I don't wear jeans anymore. Do you have a large dog? We don't have a dog, period. If not, are you afraid of them? No, I love big 'ole puppos!!!!! I just don't wanna own a dog myself. Are you good at playing darts? Holy fuck no, I have NO hand-eye coordination. I once stabbed the guy at a balloon popping booth thing with a dart in the arm, if that tells you anything, ooooooooooof. Do you like breaded chicken sandwiches? YESSSSSSSSS omg Do your parents know that/if you smoke? They know that I don’t. Have you ever been under a blacklight? Omg so in elementary school, we did this thing once where we all washed our hands as best we could and then put them under some sort of light (maybe a blacklight, idk???) to see JUST how resilient germs are. You gotta scrub the fuck out ya hands, people. How many pounds do you want to lose? I'd rather not share a number, but a lot. What’s your favorite natural phenomenon? The Northern Lights. Do you snore? Very surprisingly for someone with sleep apnea like mine, I actually don't. How many people do you know with the same first name as you? Off the very top of my head, one, but it's spelled differently. I KNOW I know of a shitload more Brittanys, though. Is it possible you could be pregnant? Well, I haven't been intimate with a man in years and just finished my period, so like- Could you go a day without texting? I go most days without texting. Do you have a step-parent? My dad is remarried, so yes. If so, do you get along with them? She's EXTREMELY Christian, so her beliefs wildly disagree with mine, but I keep my mouth shut a lot just to keep the peace. She IS a very sweet woman, nevertheless, and am glad she and my dad are so happy together. Does your current/last job require that you wear a uniform? My last job (which lasted not even two hours lol) did. When will your driver’s license expire? My permit has been expired for like... two years. Do you live in an apartment? No. If the last person you kissed proposed to you what would you say? That's too wild a concept to even imagine. I'd probably ask if she was okay lmao. Would you ever get back with one of your exes? Weeeelp, I want to get back together with Girt. Pretty badly. Write a foreign word, and what it means: "Schadenfreude" is a German term that essentially means secondhand embarrassment, but it doesn't have a perfect translation. Is there an ex you think about everyday? Inevitably. That's PTSD, my friends. Who is the last person that you said I love you to, besides family members? Sara. What's the worst thing you have ever said to anyone? Something along the lines of "no one could ever love you like I do." It boils my blood just typing that; I considered even deleting this question. That quote right there is fucking manipulation, even IF I thoroughly believed it. Who was the last person to comment one of your pictures? I don't feel like looking. Do you tend to go for older or younger when looking for someone to date? It's weird, I'm into slightly older-than-me guys, but probably girls who are barely a bit younger than me. Have you ever been used? I don't think so. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head? Like I've said in plenty of surveys: Jason is probably a permanent fixture. But also as of the past two days, Girt's been living up there. I went from "hmmm I just don't know how I feel" to "FUCK I want to talk to him about how stupidly into him I am right this fucking INSTANT" pretty goddamn fast. It kinda scares me just because of how extreme my feelings are. Again. That's only ever gotten me hurt. Buuuut let's not get into that. Have you ever got caught cheating on a test? No, because I've never tried to. Will your next kiss be a mistake? I hope it won't be. But it's not like I know the future. Have you ever worn an oxygen mask? Actually yes, when I was young and thought I was having an asthma attack or something. Mom had one for her own asthma. Then I obviously wore one for surgery. What song do you want to be played at your funeral? "Paradise" by Coldplay is absolutely #1. How many swear words are in the song you’re listening to? I'm not listening to music; I'm back to watching Gab play Sekiro. What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black. Have you ever kissed anyone of the same sex, and if so, who? Yeah, just Sara. Who did you last tell to ‘shut up’? Ha, I think my WoW friend Lyndsey, but only playfully, of course. We pick fun at each other all the time. Would you ever get a tattoo of a boyfriend/girlfriend's name? NOOOOOOOOO. Are you one of those girls who already have baby names picked out? I know what I'd name my kids IF I actually wanted any, yeah, but I don't. Do you think guys with long hair are attractive? Yessss, I love long hair on guys. Are any of your siblings taller than you? I think Ashley is a liiiiil bit taller? I know my brother is, for sure. Have you ever scared someone so badly that they cried? Yikes, no. When was the last time you wore high heels? Boy oh boy, no idea. Is there someone that you want to hurt right now? Jeez, no thanks. What was the most interesting or colorful birthday cake you’ve had? I don't remember, but I'm sure something from childhood. What was the last thing someone bought you? Was it expensive? Mom bought me food from McD's, which obviously isn't expensive. Do you have any interesting moles anywhere you don’t want people to know of? No. Have you ever gotten high or drunk in a really formal place? Strong "no" there. Do you ever write poetry and post it on any certain websites? On the very rare occasion I write poetry and actually like it, I'll sometimes post it on dA. What do you miss most about your childhood? Actually, genuinely having fun and not dealing with fucking anhedonia. Would you like to know the precise date of your future death? Hell no. Do you photograph well? I'd like to hope so. Are there any animals you flat out refuse to touch? Maggots and similar bug larvae. What super power would you refuse, if it was offered to you, and why? Mind reading. It just sounds... awful and overwhelming. What’s your favorite discontinued product that you wish would come back? Oh, I KNOW I have answers to this, just none are coming to me immediately and I don't feel like sitting here for five minutes thinking about it. If adults had show and tell, what would you bring into work? My snek! :') If you had a reset button for the last 10 years, would you press it? Tempting, but... I don't think I would. I cannot go through how deep my depression was again. Who is someone you would never swear in front of? My nieces and nephew. Yes, I don't believe in profanity being a "thing" and is just a stupid human fabrication, but nevertheless I acknowledge societal standards and expectations, and they're way too young to get when you shouldn't say something like that and why. Have you ever won a contest or competition? A few. Who is your favorite TV character? I don't think I really have one? Do you coo over other people’s babies? Not really, no. Sometimes I'll think they're super cute and be like "awww," but I don't like... squeal and spaz like some people do. What is something that makes you very squeamish? VOMIT. Has there been a celebrity death that really affected you? Steve Irwin got me deeper than anyone else. Chester Bennington hit real hard, too. If you’re out of high school, have you stayed in touch with your high school friends? If you’re still in school, do you think you will? Most of my closest ones, yes, at least via Facebook. What’s a movie that you want to see? Old movie, but Jacob's Ladder. It was a massive influence on Silent Hill, so naturally, I'll probably love it. It's a classic, anyway. Do you use the same username everywhere online or do you have a lot? I use "Ozzkat" in most places, but I do have some other ones for different sites. Who was the last person you know who became pregnant? My friend Ana recently revealed she's expecting her second child, a boy. What fad were you actually into? I have zero clue. Have you ever tailgated? Would you want to? Fuck no. That's how so many wrecks happen. My sister legit got in a wreck with an 18-wheeler mostly because she was tailgating (which she does BADLY); she was trying to pass, and he moved over at the same time because he couldn't see her coming around. It's a borderline miracle she got out with only some cuts, bruises, and a seatbelt burn. Have patience, people. Get off cars' asses. Why did you fall for the last person romantically? Look, don't get me started on this. There are a shitload of reasons and I have been way too emotional over this the past few days laksdfja;lwke What’s the last thing you had to eat? A bagel w/ cream cheese for breakfast. Do you ever pick up your house phone? We don't have a landline phone. Truth be told, are you more into looks or personalities the most? Personalities, for sure. I cannot be into you if your personality isn't attractive.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''i'm blue'' by eiffel 65

[kiseiakhun]

What are your feelings on Kyle/Jason/Wally. I kinda think it might happen if Kyle had a crush on both. Accidentally tells Wally. Teasing. Jason finding out. Jason and Wally overdramaticly flirting. Dick finds out and Kyle dying from the close proximity of both Jason/Wally Wally/Jason Jason/Kyle Wally/Kyle. And then Flirting/Showing off intensifying. Although I don't really know much about Wally or Kyle. ❤

RUBS HANDS TOGETHER

Hello? This is the greatest ask anyone’s ever sent me. Kyle is a lovey-dovey dumbass who falls in love after two seconds of knowing someone, so like. It’s real. It’s very real. He and Wally would’ve had their thing first? Because of their whole enemies to lovers arc in JL, except - because of that whole dynamic where they started off ragging on each other, I feel like they both would’ve been oblivious to their feelings. Add in a healthy dose of compulsory heterosexuality from Kyle, and yeah... the adults of the League have probably been waiting years for that ship to sail, except the babies just keep being oblivious dunderheads.

(Wally realized in his teen years that he’s not strictly heterosexual, because being on a team with Dick Grayson when you’re male tends to draw out any bent inclinations very, very quickly. It’s just. Kyle is the snot-nosed rookie too big for his britches. He’s a baby? He’s an infant. Wally is not attracted to an infant, wtf.)

And then Kyle goes off on his journey of self-discovery with Donna and Jason. Well, journey of self-discovery for him, because Jason’s ass and body and his devil-may-care tough guy attitude is the culmination of Kyle’s bisexual crisis. Seriously, countdown is basically Kyle going “ugh, that stupid hot sexy asshole is so hot and sexy around Donna, there’s no way she can resist him. Why is he attractive? He needs to stop. I’m going to fight him because he’s TOO HOT.” It’s incredible. If the writers weren’t cowards, countdown would’ve ended with them being in a triad.

Donna’s probably the one who points out that mayhaps... Kyle’s constant mooning over Jason might mean something different... and Kyle’s like wtf, no. And then he actually thinks about it, because Kyle’s one of maybe two (2) men in the dcu who has a semblance of emotional intelligence (idk who the other one is, but I’m sure he’s out there) (edit: it’s Connor. Connor Hawke. Connor is the other man. I was going to say Clark but Clark keeps going to extremes whenever he or his are threatened and. like. he tries, bless his heart, but there’s still a lot of repression going on with him) and he’s like wait. Fuck. Well what do I do with this information!! It’s not like Jason is into guys!!!

To which Donna just looks at him like, how are you so smart yet so stupid at the same time. She remembers how baby Jason mooned over Roy and Dick as much as he mooned over her. She Remembers.

(Also, lbr, Donna’s very experienced by now at dealing with dumb boys in denial about their non-het leanings. See previous statements about being on a team with Dick Grayson. She saw all of it, man. She’s seen so much.)

Cue Kyle, sitting bolt upright in bed after they’ve just wound down for the night and just saying, “Oh my god, Wally.”

And Donna’s just like, yup.

And Jason’s just like ? wtf is that asshole up to now. Whatever, idc, blissfully unaware of Kyle’s bi panic.

Anyway. The world is saved, and they get back to their Earth, and Kyle manages to put it aside because Everything Happens So Much. He’s the Green fking Lantern, okay, he doesn’t have time to deal with sexuality crises, except. Except. It won’t leave him alone?

Like, in his downtime he hangs out with Wally a lot since they’re friends, and oh yes, hello raging crush that he can no longer pretend isn’t a thing, because once Kyle acknowledges his attraction? That is it, man, there’s no turning back from that point. And ik that in canon, Jason threw a snitfit and left Kyle and Donna in the middle of their happy fun space adventure fieldtrip, but let’s say he didn’t have a sudden ooc personality turn because of writer mandate, and he stayed with Kyle and Donna until the end of their journey, and they stayed in touch.

And Kyle realizes, to his horror, that Jason is charming, and funny, and not bad on the eyes, and fuuuuck. This isn’t really helping his stupid dumb crush. Stupid dumb crushes. Goddamn.

(Sometimes Jason even joins him in his Space Adventures because of his new team. More specifically, Kori and her shiny new spaceship that can sustain humans in space conditions, and he is not jealous, shut up, Roy.)

(Roy caught on pretty quickly, because he’s much more empathetic and in tune with other peoples emotions than he pretends to be 90% of the time. Unfortunately, he only uses his powers for chaos.)

Ofc, Wally would start getting curious about Jason eventually because suddenly this kid is fucking everywhere? Dick’s calling on him for intel in the middle of a firefight, and he’s ragging on Roy’s atrocious dress sense, and he’s joking with Donna and Kyle’s giving him the same shit that he used to give to Wally, excuse me. Wasn’t he a villain or something? The last time Wally paid attention to him, he was sawing heads off in Gotham, and now Wally can’t seem to turn without tripping over him. When the fuck did that even happen?

(I’m not sure if Wally ever met Robin!Jason. Hm. Were Jason’s guest-appearances on the team during when Wally was pulling one of his stints of... I don’t WANT to be a hero, I want to be a NORMAL BOY who goes to COLLEGE, even though I literally re-created the Flash’s lab accident down to the letter just so I can have his powers and be a hero and save the world? ... ykw, we don’t acknowledge that era of Wally. This was back when he was a meninist incel or something. Ick.)

... and damn, Wally really can trip over him now, huh. Because he sure did grow up big, and strong, and rugged, and haha fuck now Dick is starting to glare at him, too, and not just at Roy, abort, abort.

...... Wally does attempt to subtly ask Roy, later, if there’s any truth to the statements about him and Jason and Kori that Roy says to Dick to get him all riled up. I say “attempt to” because Wally is bad at subtlety. It’s part of why he and Kyle get along so well. Roy realizes what he’s asking and he about has an apoplexy because Wally? Wally? Now there’s a surprise contender he did not expect, tossing his hat into the ring.

But also. Also... hot.

Roy and Kori are watching all of this while munching popcorn like damn, this is better than TV. Because Kyle’s having his crisis, his Love crisis, and Wally’s having his oh my god why do I find my best friend’s little brother hot crisis, and Jason is just happily oblivious to all of this, because he’s too busy angsting over his dad not loving him enough and dismantling trafficking rings and being the big, bad scourge of Gotham to notice Kyle pining after him like a lovelorn puppy, and Wally eyeing him appreciatively like he hasn’t eaten in a whole hour and Jason is a tender piece of marbled steak roasted on both sides to perfection. He does notice the way Kyle and Wally look at each other, though, because he’s only observant when it comes to the positive emotions of other people. And he is not stepping in the middle of that, tyvm, because from what Roy’s told him the two of them have a looooong history and he does not want to get caught in the middle of that crossfire.

Roy and Kori are both like, what makes you think it’s going to get messy, anyway? And Jason, whose real world examples of functioning relationships are 1. Willis and Catherine Todd, 2. Bruce and Selina, 3. Bruce and Talia, 4. Dick and all his exes, 5. Roy and all of his not-exes because he doesn’t date but people keep falling in love with him anyway and he panics and ghosts them because he is Roy William Commitment Issues Harper, 6. Kori and whatever the fuck she’s got going on with Dick and like, an ex? back on Tamaran? who she might still be married to?? what the fuck, 7. Kyle and Donna and their messy breakup(s)(?) (Jason doesn’t ask, because he Does Not Want To Know) (he’s too busy repressing to realize it’s half because of jealousy), is just like, that’s just how things go.

And Roy and Kori, both having mentally run through all of those ^ options while Jason was thinking of a response, are just like. ... yeah, alright, that’s fair enough.

God, every single relationship in DC is a mess.

Where was I even going with this?

Oh, right. Basically, Kyle is pining like a lovelorn idiot, Wally doesn’t know what the fuck he’s feeling and it’s making him confused, and Jason is ignoring his feelings because maybe if he just represses them hard enough, they won’t spill over and punch him in the face. Honestly, I see Wally making the first move, because his inadequacy issues don’t run as deep as Jason and Kyle’s do, and Kyle’s just like :D and Jason’s like, what the fuck. What the fuck? Because it literally blindsides him, even though it’s stupidly, painfully obvious to everyone else around him.

Either that, or Roy gets sick enough of watching their lovelorn pining, and employs Dick’s help to lock them all in a closet, naked, and fuck it out.

(Dick doesn’t actually disapprove of Jason sleeping with his friends, he just needs to get over his mental block of still seeing Jason as a baby)

Anyway. They’re all a whole-ass mess.

#holy shit this got long #also I just realized I didn't follow the scenario you suggested I'm sorry #them being Fucking Dumbasses pushed out the sexy fluff #hoodflash #jaykyle #flashtorch #jaykylewally #I'm just going to start listing three+ pairings alphabetically now #jason todd #kyle rayner #wally west #roy harper #kori #donna troy #ficlets #asks #bless you for this question #you know what I'm about #redtwomuch

[surveys4ever]

28.

What colour is the photo frame closest to you? Gold!

Are your pets asleep right now, if you have any? She was but she just got up to go get water I think.

Would you have any idea what your parents are doing right now? They just went to my cousin’s wedding so I think they’re on their way home now.

How many windows (roughly) does your house have? 16 I think?

Do you have a good relationship with your cousins? When I was younger we were all close but they’re all either insane or bigoted as hell so I have no real desire to keep a relationship with any of them.

What was the last kids movie you saw? We watched Wish Dragon the other day but it was really cute!

Do you know anyone who was born in Africa? Yes! A few guys on my husband’s crew are from Africa.

Have you ever been to an internet cafe? At this day in age, aren’t all cafes internet cafes?

Are there any upcoming events for you to look forward to? We’re going on a lil road trip soon and I’m pretty pumped for that.

Has the year gone quickly for you so far? This year has flown, man.

How many siblings does your significant other have? 4 but one committed suicide a few years ago and I’m honestly not convinced he doesn’t have any other siblings he doesn’t know about. His dad is a bit of a slut.

Are you one of those people who can drink vodka straight? I can, I don’t want to tho.

Have you ever done three or more shots in a row? Yes.

Do you share a middle name with any of your friends? With my mom.

What was the last movie you saw in theatres? Dracula.

How many pairs of jeans do you own? Ummm...over 10 but under 20. Somewhere in there.

When was the last time you showered? The day before yesterday.

Do you know the name of the pharmacist at your local drug store? I do not, haha.

What was the first cellphone you had and how old were you when you got it? Oh lord. It was a pink Samsung flip phone and I think I was in the 8th grade.

Do you use public transport in your town or city? Newp.

Have your parents ever worked in a factory? My dad worked at a pig plant when I was younger if that counts.

Do you have several best friends? A few!

How many lights are in the room you're in? One overhead light and two lamps.

Is there a Hard Rock Cafe in your town or city? Newp.

Do you eat fast food more than once a week? Definitely.

What flavour is your toothpaste? Mint?

Have you ever shared a shower or bath with someone as an adult? I raaaarely shower alone lol.

When was the last time you had a bubble bath? A few months ago.

Are you sleepy right now? Not really!

How big is your backyard? We don’t have one!

Do you know anyone with Tourette's Syndrome? Not personally, no!

What time does your alarm wake you up in the morning? Beebs is my alarm and it’s usually 9:30-9:45.

What was the last zoo you visited? Our tiny little local one.

Do you like crime films and tv shows? Depends on the show but they’re certainly not my favorite.

When you shop, do you take a basket or a cart (trolley)? Depends on how much stuff I need!

Have you ever tasted milk straight from the cow? Yes! My aunt and uncle have cows and I used to milk them when I visited. It was actually pretty fun. The milk has a very...interesting odor when its fresh tho.

What's your favourite sleeping position? On my tummy with my leg up haha.

What colour is the bra you're wearing? As if I’d be wearing a bra while being at home lol. I barely put one on to go out.

Have you ever seen A Clockwork Orange? I haven’t, actually!

Are you bitter about anything? Definitely.

Do you like to make games out of chores to make them more enjoyable? I do!

How many letters are in your best friend's surname? 6, 7, 5, and 5.

Is there anything in your possession that probably shouldn't be? Newp.

What is your favourite flavour of yoghurt? Strawberry or vanilla.

What was the first online account you remember having? Oh god...either Neopets or Whyville.

Do you listen to music to fall asleep? Nope.

Where did you go last time you left your town or city? A different city to go thrifting.

Do you use emojis? Definitely. I don’t feel like I can properly express my emotions without them.

Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer? I can’t argue without crying so I don’t exactly think I would be the best at that.

What percentage of battery does your phone currently have? 86%

What was the last type of soda you drank? A coke slushie, if that counts!

How far away from your house is your favourite place to shop for clothes? Couple miles!

Do you have supplies handy right now to draw something if I told you to? Not on me at this exact moment in time but I have them in the house.

Have you ever been married? Yup!

What does your deodorant smell like? Cocoa butter, apparently.

Is your bedroom more messy or clean at the moment? Not messy but the bed is unmade and there are some clothes on the floor.

Do you use Twitter? I don’t really post anything, I just watch what other people are doing sometimes.

Are you any good at baking cakes and cookies from scratch? I’m a great baker, yeah!

Is there a floor lamp in your bedroom? Newp.

What does most of your weekly or fortnightly income go towards? I section it out into whatever bills we have coming out, savings, groceries, gas, and then a portion that we both get to spend on whatever we want.

Do you have any hidden piercings? (this includes bellybuttons) Nope, they’re all pretty visible!

What month is your birthday? January.

What can you hear right now? I’m listening to the Bo Burnham Inside soundtrack.

#survey

[multmilk]

The Babysitter | m.l

Pairing: Babysitter!Mark x Reader (ft.bff!lucas)

Genre: Fluff and Smut

Word count: 5555 (hahahaHHHH)

Warnings: thigh riding, voyeurism, finger-fucking, risky sex?, unprotected sex (stay safe when hitting it kids!!), teasing/suggestive themes, dom!mark. mention of baby vomit, talk of death and kidnap (light-hearted).

Summary: Y/N’s parents don’t trust that she’ll be able to take care of her baby cousin alone for an entire week. So, they hire Mark Lee of www.babyhelpers.com. Feeling frustrated, Y/N makes it her mission to prove to her parents that she’s just as good as the babysitter they hired and sets a competition for the two of them. 

It's all fun and games ‘til somebody falls in love, right?  

listen to: carousel– melanie martinez (the whole album—crybaby,  inspired me to do this)  

note: also, this was supposed to be found your love but hah I changed the title and the whole story itself lmaooo sorryyy. Also, the cover was supposed to be like mark in shock with all cute baby things surrounding him but it didn’t turn as good as I hoped so I just changed the whole concept hdsjkd AND mark with babies r the best uwu (also ft. tangled my all time favorite princess movie !!) 

“He’ll be here tomorrow, honey. His name’s Mark Lee,” your mother said as she was slipping on her sandals. “So you’re telling me, you absolutely trust this stranger to take care of my 7 month-old cousin? And that this, complete stranger, knows how to handle a baby?” you scoff and put your hands on your hips.

 You cannot believe that they trust this Mark fucking Lee with your cousin? To say you were feeling bitter was an understatement.  “My colleagues recommend me to this site and to ask for specifically him. He’s gonna be great, Y/N. He has a good reputation and I’ve also seen him volunteer in church,” your mom replies with her own eyeroll, obviously knowing how salty you felt about all of this. “Still, what if he turns out to be a murderer? Not all Christian men are good you know,” you reply again and your mother huffs.

“You can always kick ass Y/N dear, we all know you’re more than capable to protect yourself,” “Also, he’s going to stay here. Make sure to give him pillows and a blanket,” “Woah woah,” your dad interjects, “He cannot stay here with two young females,” “Yeah let him stay somewhere else mom!” you chime in but your mother shakes her head and insists that it’d be easier for the boy to work if he stays at home.   “Bye dear, be nice to Mark!” your mother bids you goodbye and closes the door.  

--- 

MONDAY 

You’ve stalked this Mark all night. He sure looked nice and you were pretty sure that being nice is just his front. I mean, who looks like God’s favorite boy and actually is a good guy? That wouldn’t be possible, of course it wouldn’t be.

It was currently 8 am and your baby cousin was still asleep in her crib. You’re currently drinking coffee and gazing outside your window, thinking about a lot of things. Like, what if he actually is better at taking care of your cousin than you? You can’t let that happen, your pride completely taking over. Which lead you to a plan and that is to observe how Mark ‘works’ and completely do everything to mess his routine up. Once you’ve succeeded, you’re going to make sure that he and your parents both knew that you are just as good a sitter he is. Feeling proud of your thought, you headed back to the dining room to cook some breakfast.

Ding. You walk up to the door and open it to see Mark Lee, God’s favorite creation, right in front of your eyes. He’s even more cute in personal. Wait no, he’s your competitor.   

“Oh hi, is this Ms. Y/L/N’s house?” he asks as he looks into your eyes. You straighten up your posture albeit your knees falling weak to his sweet voice. “Yeah, I’m their daughter,” you say with arms crossed over your chest, making your breasts more prominent. Mark’s eyes leave yours for a second to glance at your breasts but quickly returns to your eyes again.

“I’m Mark Lee. I suppose you’re not the one I’m going to babysit the whole week?” he laughs a little. He takes his hand out of his pocket for you to shake but you just stare straight into his eyes. “Of course not. Jiji’s sleeping. She’s quite demanding for a 7 month-old, so if you can’t handle her just holler,” you say as you step aside for him to enter the house. He places his backpack on the couch and sits down. “I wasn’t expecting someone else to be here. You’re old enough to take care of her so why not just leave her to you? It could’ve saved you guys money,” he says. “Oh so me being here makes your task of ransacking our house a little harder doesn’t it?” you challenge and he giggles. He fucking giggles. What twenty-one year old giggles? “I’m just going to pretend I didn’t hear your horrible assumption of who I am. Anyway, so why not just leave her to you? Unless,” he trails off and you raise your eyebrows at him, silently urging him to continue. “Unless they don’t think you’re capable enough to take care of her,” and then he smirks. You turn your back to him and go up to your room.  

What a way to show him you’re an adult, Y/N. Walking out when offended? Real classy. 

 ---

 Surprisingly enough, Mark was good at taking care of Jiji. You just sat back and watched TV while he plays with the baby, feed her, cradle her to sleep and change her diapers. He really was good with babies, but whatever he could do, you could do better. Or so you think.

You’ve observed that no matter the noise or interesting thing that’s playing on the television could distract him from paying attention to your little cousin. He’s also very creative. In a span of 5 hours and 30 minutes, he’s created a brand-new rendition of the Alphabet Song that’s way better than the original one. He’s managed to help Jiji count from one to ten which makes him a good and patient teacher.  

You, however, is the complete opposite of Mark. Sure, you were very handsy with kids but with babies? Your patient runs thin and you have got quite a temper, not really good for babies if you get annoyed as soon as they cry and don’t stop.  That’s going to change tomorrow, you’ll step up your game and make sure your parents come back to a new and improved you.  

-- 

You woke up to the cries of your cousin. She slept just a few spaces away from you and you quickly felt annoyed that your sleep was ruined but grew even more annoyed when you see Mark by the doorway, looking like he woke up from his slumber as well. He rushes to the crib and carefully picks her up. He shushes her and sway side-to-side as he hums to her.  

“Give her to me Mark,” you say standing up “Nonesense, this is my job. Go back to sleep Y/N,” he continues to rock the baby back to sleep.   You scoff once again and try to take the baby away from him but he quickly turns to his side and squints his eye at you. “I can make her fall asleep faster, Ma- wait. How did you know my name?” you whisper-yelled and he says he saw your high school diploma downstairs. “With the way you’re talking, you’re not helping her fall asleep faster,” he comments but you weren’t going to give up. You step forward but he steps back, still cradling baby Jiji. “Quit it, Y/N,” but you ignore his statement. “Stop it! Why are you insisting on stealing her?” his tone of voice made you flinch a bit. 

Jiji cries and you both stare each other down as he still hums to her, mumbling a quick apology to the baby.   “I can take care of her too, Mark. I’m just as good as you are!” you whisper-yelled again and then he looks at you with a mischevious glint in his eye. He steps forward and you back-away, only stopping once your back has hit the edge of the crib. “Oh so this is what this is? You trying to prove you’re a better sitter than me? To what? Boost your ego? Prove your parents wrong?” he says lowly. You turn your head to the side and look straight at the window, just to avoid the way he’s looking at you right now.  “It won’t end well for you, sweetheart. I’m a pro at what I’m doing,” he says again and when you don’t reply he just smirks to himself as he sets Jiji down when she’s fast asleep. He opens your door but stops to say something before going out,  

 “Good luck Y/N. May the best sitter win,” and you look at him. He smiles and winks at you and then turns to leave. 

 ---

[11:20 pm] to: yuck-hei  

I am going to kick his ass tomorrow 

[read 11:20 pm]  

[11:21 pm] from: yuck-hei 

Who's ass??

[read 11:21 pm] 

[11:21 pm] to: yuck-hei 

Mark lee!!! The sitter my parents hired

[read 11:21 pm] 

[11:21 pm] from: yuck-hei 

Mark lee? From babyhelpers.com? I know him, he took care of my sister while me and my parents were away. 

[read 11:22 pm]

[11:22 pm] from: yuck-hei 

He’s really good and nice y/n sooo y ru planning on kicking his ass?

[read 11:22 pm] 

[11:24 pm] to: yuck-hei 

Not helping lucas!!!! 🙁( my parents think he’s more capable of tending to jiji way more than I can :--( 

[read 11:24 pm]  

[11:24 pm] from: yuck-hei 

Not to be a total ass but,,, you’re not really keen on babies? Remember when you had to take care of my sister while I was out to buy food for us?  

You cringe as the scene plays out in your mind. Lucas was going to buy you guys ice cream and pizza and you had volunteered to take care of his sister. At first it was fun just playing toys with her but she had started to cry and you assumed she was hungry so you bought out the baby food Lucas had stored in their cupboard. She stopped crying once you fed her but then she started crying again and as you were trying to feed her more food, she vomited all over your (Lucas') shirt and your face. A white and creamy substance drips down to your neck and chin. On top of all of that, her diaper was full and she had pooped and some of it had stained the couch you two were sitting on. 

Lucas was not amused. 

--- 

TUESDAY 

Cooking breakfast was supposed to be the first step to your plan but of course, Mark had beat you to it. He had bought you guys fast food and was currently eating his chicken when he spotted you standing in the stairway. He greeted you a good morning while raising his chicken at you. You walked towards your cupboard looking for something to eat when Mark said, “I bought you food too, Y/N,” but you refuse and insist on cooking your own food.

“I bet this chicken is better than what you’ll cook,” he said with a teasing tone. “Watch me,” you challenge and pull out carton after carton of your meal. The whole time you were cooking, Mark hadn’t tear his gaze away from you, only moving when he thinks he hears Jiji make a sound upstairs. He’d make comments here and there to infuriate you and soon enough, it did. 

“God can you shut up? I’m trying to cook here,” you snap at him and he just laughs. “Maybe you should find a way to make me shut up,” he tests you and you felt your heart quicken at his statement. You were just taken aback right? As you were about to come with a witty remark, Mark had rushed upstairs when he heard a thud. Of course you wanted to see what happened upstairs but your bigger concern was not burning your house down.

You’ve finished cooking and Mark has ascended from upstairs, carrying baby Jiji while she sucks her thumb. “She put pillows on top of each other to get out of the crib,” he says then sets Jiji down on the chair beside him. “Then, she landed on your bed. She attempted to crawl down I guess? Found her on the floor,” he proceeds to feed the baby small pieces of cut out chicken.

“Wait, she fell from my bed? Oh God, what if she hit her head or something? What if something happen-” “She’s fine. I’ve checked for for any sign of injury and there was none. We jury and there was none. We could go to the hospital first thing tomorrow,” Mark reassures you and you nod. You three eat in silence, watching the raindrops race on the window.  

--- 

Your baby sister was sat on Mark’s lap, they were both coloring different Disney princesses. They looked cute together, Mark was cute, however you can’t afford to get distracted. Suddenly, an idea popped into your head. Grinning, you take Jiji and Mark looks at you dumbfounded, ready to scold you but, you shush him and tell him you thought of something nice. 

You rummaged your closet to find the princess costume you wore a few years back in Halloween. It was a Rapunzel (from Tangled) dress and you had the complete set. Violet dress, blonde wig, golden tiara and purple shoes. It wouldn’t fit Jiji, considering you were 12 years-old when you wore this so you cut the length and adjusted the sleeves. You helped Jiji change and put the tiara on her. She looked like a princess and you both giggled. You got out a purple dress and slipped it into your body and made Jiji choose your jewelry. You drew a makeshift crown and used clips to put it on your hair. After finishing, you carried your cousin downstairs and found Mark furiously coloring Princess Aurora’s dress. 

“Mark,” he turns around and his eyes go wide at the sight of you in a dress. “You know if you wanted to dress up for me, you could’ve done so without having to drag Jiji along,” he comments as he walks toward you to take Jiji. “You look so cute princess,” he says and lifts Jiji up into the air. You were about to thank him for the compliment but realize it was meant for the baby he was holding

“You’re going to dress up too,” you say and his eyes bulge out and you and Jiji laugh out loud in sync. “Surely you’ve watched Tangled?” you ask and he hums in approval. “Good. You’re playing Mother Gothel,” you say and throw him the red dress you have. “I’m not wearing a dress Y/N!” he exclaims and Jiji laughs louder. “But Jiji would want to see Markie in a dress. Isn’t that right Jiji?” you turn to look at your cousin and she nods her head, obviously amused at the sight of two adults playing dress up. “You’re lucky you two are cute,” is all Mark says before he puts the baby down and treads to the bathroom to change.

--

The lights were dim and the golden light of the sun shun through the white flower-patterned curtains. You set Jiji down on the couch with her stuff toys and pillows around her. The scene where Mother Gothel and Rapunzel sing plays in the background and you and Mark take your positions and act out. 

“Mother’s here to help you

All I have is one request

Rapunzel?” Mark sings, also incredibly well at that

“Yes?” you ask totally in character

“Don’t ever ask to leave this tower again,” he looks into your eyes and holds your waist

“Yes mother,” you reply not tearing your gaze from his

“I love you very much dear,” Mark says again that caused butterflies in your stomach

“I love you more,” you smile

“I love you most,” he releases his grip from your waist 

“Don’t forget it

You’ll regret it

Mother knows best,” he sings with a dramatic roll of his head.

Jiji laughs and claps her hand. You’ve never seen your cousin so happy and so you giggle and Mark joins in. The three of you collapse into a fit of laughter ‘til you notice you and Mark were close to each other again. You’ve both stopped laughing and so did the other two. You inhale as he moves his face closer to yours, his lips a mere inch away from your own 

“Oona,” Jiji mumbles and you both turn to look at her. Jiji points at the man standing at the door, also known as Wong Yukhei. You pull out of Mark and clear your throat. Lucas stands frozen on the doorway, completely forgetting that he was in the process of untying his shoes. He stares at you then back at Mark then at Jiji and then back at you. You clap your hands and this seems to remove everyone’s trance. Jiji goes back to watch the movie on the television and Mark removes the violet eyeshadow and blue lipstick Jiji (and you) had put on his face. You breeze walk towards your giant friend and pull him towards the dining room.

“If I interrupted something, I could leave,” he suggests and you take note of the stupid smile on his face, you knew he was never going to let this go. “Shut up, it’s part of my plan,” you pinch his side and he laughs out loud, you know the kind that’s so deep yet it booms the entire house? Yeah, that laugh. “Part of my plan my ass,” Yukhei shakes his head. You mumble something about keeping him distracted to prevent him from doing his work but you both know it’s complete bull.

“Why are you here anyways? You could’ve texted or called me you know,” you tell him as you wash the lipstick off of your face.“I’ve texted you ten times, called you twenty times. Thought you were dead or something worse so I thought I’d come to the rescue. If you weren’t so… distracted, You would’ve heard your phone go off,” he adds and sprinkle water from the faucet at him to act like his words offended you.

“Okay fine. I was distracted but- wait, did you just say something worse than death? What could possibly be more heartbreaking than death?” you ask, completely forgetting to ask why he was here seeing as he didn’t answer it the first time. 

“Getting kidnapped,” he says it as if it’s such an obvious answer, you wanted to hit his arm. “I mean, when you’re dead it would leave a scar and yeah permanent damage. But when you’re kidnapped and not found and all of that, the uncertainty of it just leaves you hollow and lost too, you know? So yeah, I think not knowing where a person is, possibly knowing she’s in danger and you can’t do anything to save them, is scarier and much worse than death,” you give him a nod and think over his words.

Whenever you’re with Lucas, your talks could completely shift from funny and dumbassery to 2 am deep talks and you love it. “Any who, I came by to hang out but if you prefer to be with-“ you cut him off saying that he should stay, already knowing what’s going to be next in that sentence of his. He chuckles and kisses your head. You didn’t know that Mark was watching the two of you as he fixed the mess you three made. He ignored the feeling of jealousy that’s bothering him.

--

Lucas had introduced himself to Mark and Mark surprisingly remembered who the tall friend of yours was. The three of you had settled on the couch to watch a movie while Jiji sat between your legs. The blanket wasn’t big enough for the four of you so everyone was sitting close to each other. As much as you wanted to watch a horror movie, the two boys beside you refused and used Jiji as an excuse. You all settled to watch Get Smart, all adults being a fan of Anne Hathaway and Steve Carell. 

Lucas mimicked the sounds of guns going off and you and your baby cousin would laugh every time, except when Mark tried to do it too. It instead had made Jiji cry and Mark quickly apologizes and shuts his mouth soon after. Halfway through the film, Jiji had fallen asleep and you and Yukhei cuddled.The blanket was off of you three and instead draped over Jiji’s little legs so Mark could clearly see Yukhei’s hand on your thigh, giving it subtle squeezes every now and then. He observed the way you reacted to Lucas’ touches and you oddly felt at peace. Your eyes dropped and you quietly snored on Yukhei’s chest.  

“She’s pretty, huh?” Lucas’ voice surprised Mark so the boy averted his gaze. “When you decide you want her and maybe go for something serious with her, make sure to take care of her, okay? Don’t break her heart, Mark. I mean it,” Lucas says as he stares the smaller boy down. Mark nods and stands up to take Jiji upstairs. Mark placed her on the crib and jogged downstairs to help you clean up. 

What he didn’t expect was you to stand in front of Yukhei and kiss him on the cheek. You bid him goodbye and sigh of exhaustion.

“You and Lucas are a thing, huh?” Mark asks you as he turns the television off. “Yeah a platonic thing,” you reply and stretch your limbs, the action causing your shirt to lift up and Mark catch a glimpse of your tummy. He blushes and turns around, acting as if he didn’t see anything.  “Good night, Mark,” you tell him and go upstairs.   

--

WEDNESDAY  

True enough to his words, as soon as the three of you had eaten and bathed, you went to the hospital. It is a nice day outside, the sun was shining but not bright enough to hurt your eyes. The wind was blowing Jiji and Mark’s hair and there weren’t many cars on the street early in the morning. 

The trees that surrounded the hospital made the day prettier. The scenery serene and comforting.

Jiji was playing with the rag doll the pediatrician gave her to distract her while the doctor checks for any damage.The doctor then explains that it was good that you took your cousin to the doctor to be sure but advised that next time, it’d be better and easier to assess the damage if you bring her earlier. She reassures that Jiji will be fine and that you three could be on your way. 

You’re in a toy shop and decide to spoil your baby cousin, it isn’t everyday you get to go out with her anyways. Mark was by the toy gun section as you pick up the barbie dolls your cousin had chosen.

You approach the black-haired boy but screamed when he pointed a gun at you and tells you to freeze. Without even thinking of your actions, you hands immediately shot up in mock surrender, causing the dolls to fall on the tiled floor. Mark laughs and apologizes while you huff and stomp away from him, Jiji on tow.

“That’s all you’re going to buy? I could definitely buy Jiji more,” Mark comments as he hands you back the dolls you’ve dropped. “You know what, I’m going to look for a toy that I think Jiji wants and come back here to let her choose. Loser buys us lunch,” Mark confidently says. You chuckle and allow him to do so. Five minutes later and he comes back with a Rapunzel doll in his hand. Jiji’s eyes sparkles almost immediately when she sees the toy she’s holding. Mark crouches down and whispers into Jiji’s ears. 

“Y/N-ie dressed up like this doll remember? This doll and your noona look the same right? Very pretty, yeah?” and Jiji nods her head enthusiastically and grabs the doll from Mark. “What did you say to her? That’s cheating Lee!” you yelled at the guy but he just laughs at you. “I won fair and square sweetheart. Now where to to lunch?” he grins and you grimace. 

--

The whole day you and Mark competed for Jiji’s attention. Mark was winning by three points and boy, did he gloat. Mark had carried the shopping bags and you carried Jiji. It was still a sunny day so you decided to head to the amusement park. Mark left the shopping bags near the counter and bought tickets for the three of you.  

You watched as Mark shot target after target, too immersed in the game just so he could get that big ass teddy bear. You and Jiji watched the way the veins in his arm popped out whenever he pulled the trigger. Well obviously, your baby cousin wouldn’t focus on that detail exactly, she was just happily eating ice cream while watching the targets go down one by one. 

You’ve all tried different rides (ones that allow you to bring your cousin with you) and was about to go home before Mark argued with you that winning a teddy bear before going home is an absolute must. How could you say no when he looked so cute? You completely forget the competition thing, fully accepting that Mark was indeed a better sitter than you.

 “Yes!” Mark exclaimed and he looked downright happy. He’s fist-pumping the air and jumped twice before he had to calm himself down when parents and children looked at him. He takes the giant teddy bear and hands it to you. “Wait this is for me?” you ask, shock and confusion very evident on your face. Mark nods and you thank him. 

“We never really started right. Consider this as my peace offering?” his tone seems a little hesitant but you reassure him with a kiss to his cheek. It seemed as if time had stopped and only the three of you were existing. It was a perfect moment until it started raining, hard. When the hell did the clouds turn grey? You two rush to get your shopping bags and run for shelter. 

Soon enough the rain had stopped but nothing quickly shielded you from its impact earlier. The three of you were soaking and Jiji was crying. You then decided to take a cab and go home.

--

You took Jiji to the bathroom to give her a quick bath and then dried her. You had Mark get her her baby formula. “Here y-“ Mark stops in his tracks as he sees you taking off your shirt. Time seems to be fucking with him because every moment seemed slower than the last one. He watched as you unclasped your bra, throwing it to the side. 

What he couldn’t take was when you bent down to take your jeans off of you completely. He hid himself behind your door, breath hitched as he felt blood rushed down his cock. It’s so so wrong, but it felt so good. He wanted to touch you, caress you, kiss you and nourish you. “Mark?” you ask and he cleared his throat before handing you the formula. You thank him and smile. 

He’s certain he won’t get any sleep tonight. 

--

THURSDAY  

It took everything in Mark’s willpower to bend you over your kitchen counter and ram into you. Last night, you wearing a shirt with no bra on and definitely no shorts on. When your little cousin had slept peacefully. You two listened to chill music, talked about your childhood and dreams. Mark discovered you two had a lot in common and focused on your stories instead of the way your lips moved or when your thighs move when you shift into a more comfortable position. 

Last night was pure torture for Mark but he secretly loved it, not wanting it to be any other way.

The last straw however, was when he saw you at 7 am in the morning, earphones on (but he could hear the Paramore song you were playing from where he was standing) with nothing but a bra and pajamas on. Sure, it was hot, but didn’t you feel bothered that another man, especially a stranger, was in your house and you’re wearing little clothes? Not to mention how you were practically body rolling at this time of the day? 

“Y/N,” Mark said as he moved towards you. “Y/N!” he says more loudly which causes you to jump a bit. Mark’s eyes trailed down your body, stopping momentarily at your breasts. “Like what you see?” you teased and his jaw clenched. “Are you doing this on purpose?” “What ever do you mean?” you smile coyly, voice laced with innocence. 

His hands travel your waist and then he licks the shell of your ear, making you visibly shudder.  “Changing your clothes knowing I can walk in on you any minute, not wearing anything underneath that shirt last night and now this? You must be desperate for me,” ”P-please,” you stutter suddenly hyperaware of how his dick was so straining against the fabric of his sweatpants. “Please what?” he challenges “Please make me feel good, daddy?” you say.

Mark throws his head back and groans. He picks you up and sets you down on the floor near the couch. Mark spreads his legs apart, cock even more visible, so visible you could see the slightest hints of it throbbing.  “Ride my thigh like the good girl you are,” and you follow him immediately. You remove your sweatpants and leave your underwear on, your arousal dripping. You grip his shoulders as you rock back and forth on his thigh. You two were both moaning at the friction, it all felt too good.  “Fuck, I’m going to come,” at your statement, Mark slips to fingers inside your panties and began fucking you with his fingers. Soon enough, your orgasm came and you melted into Mark as he praises you. “You did so well baby, fuck,” he comments and carries you upstairs bridal-style.

You whimper as he sets you down on the bed. “Quiet baby, you don’t want to wake Jiji up do you?” and his smirk goes wider as you shake your head profusely.

Mark kisses you for the first time and you swear you could feel sparks ignite both of your bodies. His hand goes to squeeze your left breast as he peppers the right one with kisses. His other hand goes to toy with your clit and it causes your body to spasm. “Fuck Mark,” you moan breathlessly as he pinches your nipple and rubs your clit at the same time. Mark removes his pants and boxers, discarding it somewhere near the door.  

Mark pumps himself a few times before he enters you without warning. You both moan at the pleasure of being filled, completely forgetting that your cousin was sleeping in a crib near you. Mark thrusts at a quick pace and grip the sheets. “You’re so tight baby,” he moans. “Y-you’re so tight daddy-ah- harder please,” and Mark complies. Mark felt you clench and so he asks if you’re close but before you could reply you were already coming. Mark thrusts a few more times before he was finishing too. Mark lays down beside you and holds you close.

“Thank you,” you say looking up at him and he kisses your forehead. Just as you were about to sleep, Jiji cries and both you and Mark grunt and then laugh. 

 --

FRIDAY 

You had Jiji sit on top of your lap while Mark was taking videos of you two. You and Mark had agreed to somewhat date and to take things slow. If anyone walks in on the three of you, you would’ve looked like a happy family. Not that you aren’t, you three looked too cute. 

The door unlocks and reveals the shocked face of your mother.  “Mom?” you say, tone a bit higher than you intended. Mark goes to help life the suitcases your parents bring and also doesn’t forget to greet them. “How was the trip?” “It’s great honey. What about the three of you?” “I’ve had fun with Mark” “Y/N’s lovely, Miss Y/L/N,” you and Mark say simultaneously. Your mother seems to pick up the (cute) tension between the two of you and smiles. “How was Y/N with Jiji?” Mark smiles and tells her all about the adventures the three of you had gone through. Mark bids you farewell and promises to see you again. 

 --

“Bye dear! I hope you don’t mind that Mark helps you out with Jiji?” you shake your head and shout “Not at all! Stay safe!” and Mark enters your home. You jump and he catches you with no trouble, wrapping your arms around his neck you both say, “I missed you,” and you smile as he leans in to kiss you. 

Needless to say, you were happy with the service he provided.    

#mark lee #mark lee smut #mark lee x reader #nct mark x reader #nct mark smut

[ashimakth]

Hangang drama club

Pairing: jk x reader, jimin x reader, hoseok x reader

Chapters: more to come

Genre: angst, fluff, maybe future smut idk yet💜

Author’s note: pardon my English. It’s my second language, which I taught myself by watching numerous American TV shows 😅

Summary:Your friendship was unique and healing. They were your guardians and you were their polar star. Everything was working out perfectly until they left you, roughly and abruptly, making you chase after them and the thin veil of memories they left behind. And it felt like a triple stab right into the chest - because you loved them all. No, not only that. You were in love with them.

Three years had gone and your heart hadn’t healed. You didn’t know why it all happened but deep down you guessed - you were never enough for them. There was no place for you in their new adult life. They just went back to how it was before they met you, and it was alright.

It was alright until you met them all again. And as they took their turns to attack your poor heart, you job was to keep it whole without parting it into three equal pieces leaving yourself with none at all.

CHAPTER 1

You hated it. The smell, lingering in the air after a rainy morning, gray skies and deep puddles on the streets. It was that time of the year again.

You anticipated this autumn with anxiety every time you looked at the calendar.

The 1st of September.

The day he left you three years prior. His birthday.

He must be having fun tonight. At some club in Itaewon, sitting in a circle of his new friends, surrounded by colourful beverages and young females, flashing their chests to attract his attention.

He was buff in school already, and you could only imagine how handsome he looked now, considering his utter love for sports and pulling weights.

Was he doing it for himself or for other girls? Had he always been like that?

Had he noticed how much you liked that from the very beginning? Was it the reason he pushed you away?

Shame filled up your chest again. There was no doubt it was you who fucked everything up. Not them, no, never them, it was only your fault. They had never been anything but incredibly kind, patient and sweet. They taught you what real friendship was. They showed you how messed up your perception of people was; they taught you how to trust.

Just as you lift your third glass of pure soju towards your sour lips, a bright giggle filled the small dining room of Korean restaurant you were drowning your sorrows in tonight.

A young man, who walked inside with a group of same aged friends, quickly took the nearest table, making you hold your breath.

Jimin.

His hair was light pink this time, the colour he always loved on himself the most. You would never confess stalking his social media at night, how you smiled bitterly every time he posted a new photo or story. He was as charming as always, brushing his soft hair back and licking his plump lips, just before he turned around to call for a waitress and noticed you.

His bright expression quickly faded away and you immediately regretted coming here tonight. You regretted wearing a stupid white hoodie and just a mascara. If only you knew you would bump into your first love after three years of not seeing him, you would have definitely bothered to put some effort into your appearance. But every September 1st sucked out all of your energy so much you couldnt even lift a finger. Except today, there was something odd in the air because you were here and not in your bed.

Just three meters away from him.

He took a couple of seconds to make sure he wasn’t seeing things and it was really you, then turned back to his group of friends. Your heart sinked. It had been three years, two boyfriends and a couple of meaningless affairs, and you sincerely believed you were over them. Only September brought back the memories, but any other month of the year you felt almost completely positive that if you met one of them, you could keep a straight face.

Except the way he handled your encounter made you feel so rejected you wanted to leave the city and never, ever come back. Maybe you should have moved to Busan? Sunny weather, the sea, beautiful architecture. Calm and simple people. You loved simple things. Things that didn’t make you face complicated feelings.

‘Hi’.

His voice broke on the only word he uttered, and you knew you were totally fucked. The soft sound echoed in your ears and for a moment you thought you were hallucinating or seeing him in your sleep again before you realized it was really him.

You got distracted for a moment and he managed to slide into the seat opposite to you.

There was awkward silence as you stared at him, shocked by a sudden proximity. Was three years really enough to forget how he looked up close? Photos did him no justice, they could never capture the way his eyes sparkled under the lights or how adorable and hot his plump fingers were, framed by thick male rings. Did he still wear the one you gave him as a promise of always being on his side? From the look of it, no, he didn’t.

Jimin seemed nervous, but smiled nevertheless. That was what he always did whatever he felt on the inside - he smiled. Maybe you still knew him better that he knew himself…

'Do you… ’ He swallowed. 'Do you remember me? ’

You frowned. What did he mean? How could you not… remember him?

'We were… Um. Classmates. In high school. “ He chuckled, scratching behind his ear awkwardly. Your lack of answer increased his nervousness.

Classmates? What kind of nonsence was coming out of his mouth?

'Are you kidding me right now?’ You answered incredulously. 'What do you mean "do I remember you”? We literally spent every day of our last year at school together.’

The boy across from you visibly relaxed.

'Yeah, I know’ He breathed out. 'I’m sorry. It’s just… Some people preferred to erase me from their memory, so… I was just checking, sorry.’

'What do you mean?’ You asked, and by the way his expression changed you guessed he regretted saying the last part.

Jimin looked so lost that you wanted to kiss him. To stretch across the table, squish his cheeks and put your lips on his. To taste him again. You wanted to tell him that no matter what he said or did you would always have a place for his pretty soul in your heart, that there was no one like him on this planet but you knew it was unhealthy. Like your relationship with each one of them.

Unhealthy. Destructive. Wrong.

It was for the better that the circle ripped apart. It was better that way than seeing with your own eyes how their paths part ways with yours, how they get married and have kids, how they grow and become even more beautiful and more worthy men, while you just watch and silently desire. They could maintain their friendship without being madly jealous, but you couldn’t. And the idea proved itself when you met Jimin.

You would always want to own him if he was near, but you had no right to do so. He had never been yours, he wasn’t designed for it. He was meant for bigger and better things than your fucked up indecisive feelings.

Jimin looked at you not breaking eye contact and it made you think about how much he had changed. Not on the outside, really, he was still 50% cuteness and other 50% sexiness but the way he held himself despite being visibly shaken by your meeting showed that he definitely matured over the years. His posture, the way he spoke was calm and graceful, and not so chaotic like before. You wondered if you seemed different to him as well. Did he recognize Y/N he fed tokpokki after school in this same restaurant? Did he still think your eyes were pretty?

'Erm… What are you eating?’ He asked, trying to find something to change the subject, because, of course he knew what you were eating. It was right in front of him.

“Just… Meat. You?’ You took a small bite just to show him.

'Me too. We, I mean. My colleagues. From the store.’

'From Zara?’ You asked, trying to swallow the meat, but it stuck in your throat. God, you were shaking.

'Yeah.’ He smiled. 'Wait. How do you know I work there? ’

Shoot. Stalker caught red-handed.

'I saw you… ’ Don’t you dare tell him. Don’t. ’…when I was shopping. A couple of months ago. ’

Well, technically. You saw him. His. Photo. On his. Insta page. That you didn’t follow.

And you would never walk into that store, knowing he was there.

He beamed, eager to dig deeper, while you hoped he would drop the subject. 'Why didn’t you come up and say hi? I would’ve given you a discount.’ He winked. 'I’m the store’s manager. Which means I’m the boss. Well, almost.’ He giggled, his lips curving prettily. 'Technically there’s a senior manager above me, but she’s never around. So, I’m basically solving all the shit. But, please don’t say anything about it, lol, she’s right behind me’.

You giggled at his 'lol’, amused that he still used that word aloud in a sentence.

'I won’t. Don’t worry’. You smiled widely, and Jimin stared at your mouth for a split second, before averting his gaze somewhere to the side.

'Maybe… You want to join us? If you’re alone’. Jimin proposed. It seemed like he didn’t actually mean that and made the offer just out of politeness, judging by the way he fiddled with his fingers on the table. The boy was still looking everywhere but at you. What was he thinking about? What did he want? Why did he come sit here with you, smiling at you like that, melting your frozen heart? After disappearing from your life so abruptly, and leaving you all alone. You always considered him the most loyal out of all three. You supposed that at least Jimin, the boy with a heart of pure gold, would never break his promises.

When you thought that you still knew him the best, you were wrong. You couldn’t read him anymore.

'I don’t… Think I’ll be fun to spend time with tonight. Not really in the mood.’

'Why?’ Jimin finally met your gaze.

'It’s the day.’

He frowned. 'The day?’

'Yeah’.

'What do you mean?’

You didn’t want to answer. Did he really not remember? Three years ago on that same day Jungkook told you he didn’t ever want to see you again. That your friendship was over. That he didn’t see a future with you in his life. You cried, running after him, but he just left you there in Hangan park all alone. Not caring that you couldn’t keep up with him because your feet hurt in shoes a size too small. Not giving a single shit about you.

Your heart hurt, but you managed to squeeze out a, 'Why aren’t you with Jungkook today?’

Jimin frowned. 'Jungkook? I haven’t seen him in a while, actually. Why?’

You kept silent. He looked at you puzzled, catching your every movement as if trying to read you.

'Just… It’s his birthday. I thought you’d be with him, like always. And what do you mean you haven’t seen him in a while, did he go abroad or something?’ You were hundred percent positive they maintained their tight bond even after the four of you "split up” in 2017.

'Erm, no.’ Jimin chuckled bitterly and you finally saw another glimpse of an old version of him, incredibly soft for his best friend. 'We kinda… Decided to end things. And… God, it sounds like we dated or something’. He snorted.

'Well, it’s not far from the truth. There we dozens of girls practically begging for your attention, but the two of you always hid from them somewhere, hand in hand. I was so jealous at first’. You laughed.

'You were?’ Jimin looked at you strangely.

'Yeah… ’ You smiled, not noticing his gaze. Ornaments on the table seemed more interesting to you than his attentive eyes when you got so flustered. 'Sometimes I feel sad that our ways parted. I know, I know, people change, and I kinda expected that somewhere deep inside, but I’m not that… I’ve never been that important in the first place, joining you for a year and being an annoying bug, following you around while you and Kookie have known each other since Kindergarten. Connections like that can’t be ripped easily. You should call him, you know. Don’t be stubborn.’

The boy hesitated to answer. You didn’t look at him, so you couldn’t see what his face looked like.

Suddenly, and very unexpectedly, Jimin got really angry.

'How can you say that?!’

You looked up to see him staring at you intently.

'How… What?’

He brushed his hair back, shaking his head in disbelief, then smacked his palms on the table, earning a couple of anxious glances from the table to your right, where his colleagues sat at.

'Jimin, is everything okay?’ Some young man from the group asked him worriedly.

Jimin breathed audibly through the nose, heat running up his neck and covering his cheeks in splotches.

'You have no fucking idea.’ He whispered. 'How fucking hard it is sometimes. How hard it is still.’

You wanted to cry. He really scared you with this. The bitter taste in your mouth was a hint that you were going to weep pretty soon, and, seeing him so angry at you, so pissed off by only a sight of you, it made your fight-or-flight response kick in. You remembered his expression when he just saw you today, recalled the way he held himself too formal, smiling overpolitely - too distant and cold for the sweet and warm Jimin you knew before - always so understanding and ready to support your any idea no matter how stupid or wrong it was, and everything finally came into place.

It took three years and this encounter to dispel the illusion. They all despised you. Jungkook and Jimin. And maybe… Hobi did too?

It took no time grabbing your purse and storming out of the restaurant. Tears were streaming down your cheeks, but even through the pain you gave it one last chance and stopped to listen.

You prayed to hear his voice calling after you. He always went after you whenever you were mad or upset. Your Jimin would never leave you alone in the dark. He would always care that you got home safe. He was always… On your side.

But there was none. Nothing. Only dead silence and sound of droplets hitting the ground. Cold rain masked your tear-stained cheeks, being your only guard in the night.

You really hoped that Jungkook was happy tonight. He was turning 21, and you hoped he wasn’t crying like you, all alone.

But, no matter how hard you tried to persuade yourself that you were a good person, you wanted him to cry. Before going to bed that night you imagined his heart being broken into million unmendable pieces just like he managed to break yours.

Have you ever imagined what your life would be like if you were opposite gender? Would things be easier if you were a boy?

Sometimes you remembered summer days at the beach, when all of your boys went swimming, while you sat there, toes buried in sand and eyes trained at the water, full of jealousy.

You couldn’t tell them you were on your period, because in your small circle the term didn’t exist. You were the only female, and you four never talked about it. Such topics were reserved for girly talks.

The two youngest were utterly oblivious when you lied about water being too cold for you for the third day in a row. Hoseok, on the other hand, retreated to the shore right after dipping only once.

He plopped on a towel next to you and wiggled a little until his thigh and arm were flush to yours. His skin was wet and cold but you felt his warm stare while he examined your face.

'Does it hurt?’

You looked at him frowning.

'Your stomach. I heard that it hurts when you bleed. Just wanted to tell you that if you need anything: painkillers, pads, tampons, just tell me. Okay? I’ll go get them for you.’

You kept silent. The very idea of discussing periods with Hoseok was awkward as hell. What had gotten into him? You never… Mentioned tampons and…pads.

Denying would have been stupid. So you just shrugged, 'Why? So suddenly. ’

He pressed closer, lowering his head so no one on the beach could overhear you. 'Because I don’t want you to feel lonely when you’re with us. I would be the worst friend if I let you go through this alone. I don’t want you to be ashamed of anything in front of me, and I hate the idea of any of you three feeling helpless and silently suffering.’

'Okay… ’ You whispered, shame still licking at your insides but with his sweet words it dissipated a little.

'Yeah?’ He smiled that sunshine smile of his, like you made him the happiest man alive just by being there with him, and you reciprocated.

'Mhm. I don’t want that either. You can tell me everything too. ’

He looked so content watching the seawaves there by your side. Was it even possible not to fall in love with this person eventually? His precisely graven side profile, his lean body, his sweet vanilla scent - everything about him was extremely enticing and you quickly got trapped into his net.

He was a beautiful creature and every time he was around, saying these warm words, looking at you like that, you melted. If you had to pick one you wanted to touch the most it would have definitely been Hoseok. You wanted to trace his nose and lips with pads of your fingers, to caress his cheeks and brush his hair all the way to the nape of his neck, feeling his softness, his silkness everywhere. There was something about his presence that intoxicated you to the state of dizziness. To the state of craziness, making you completely forget about any decency.

You prayed he didn’t know that.

But sometimes you suspected that Jungkook did.

Sometimes you caught him staring at you while you stared at his childhood friend, and it made you sick to the stomach. You were disgusted by yourself. What if Jungkook really knew what was going on in your brain?

But then you checked again and he was already busy with something else, yelling loudly or jumping around. Maybe you were just making that up because there just had been too much on your mind since you started to hang out with them? Everything was new to you: you had never been best friends with a boy before, not to mention three boys all at the same time; you had never went on a trip with boys only. You basically didn’t know much about how they functioned. Their thinking, their behaviour were subjects you yet needed to study.

At that time, when everything just started, you couldn’t even imagine falling in love with three people at the same time.

But, eventually, you did. Jimin first. Then Hobi. And lastly… Jungkook.

It was inevitable.

When you changed schools, Hoseok greeted you on your first day, accompanying you to your class. You were so nervous you didn’t even remember his name, not to mention his face. Feelings came later. Much later.

You didn’t fit in from the very start. Girls seemed to ignore you, having already established their small friendship circles and not bothering to welcome someone new, and boys were… Boys were just boys. You weren’t the type to approach them first. They usually broke your heart, so you got used to keeping your distance.

However, there was someone who couldn’t bear you looking all lonely and sad. Pity was his weakest point and it did him no good. Eventually, he saved you just like he used to save kittens and dogs, abandoned and wandering around the streets.

On the third day of you sitting all alone, someone put a packet of strawberry milk right in front of you on your desk. When you looked up at him you saw a young boy with kindest smile holding his both hands up in a greeting. He was wearing only white shirt with a blue tie, no jacket, and you immediately recognized him as the student who went to the blackboard far more often that anyone else in the class. He was an A student, you figured.

'Hi, Y/N! What’s up?’ He asked cheerfully, taking the seat in front of you and turning so he could see you properly.

You blinked at him a few times before he laughed, the sound and his charming smile speeding up your pulse. 'I’m Jimin. And this is my favourite milk, very good one. You should drink it.’

Your first impression of him, apart from him being extremely cute, was that you really liked his laugh. And he did laugh a lot, turning out to be a very giggly person.

Strangely enough, after that day you started to hang out during the breaks pretty regularly. It went by the same scenario every day: he plopped on the seat in front of you and started a mindless conversation about homework or that day’s menu at the canteen and you just listened, relaxing in his presence day by day. He seemed to notice the way you spoke up more because soon enough he exchanged seats with a boy in front of you by bribing him with a box of chocolate and, finally, started to be around you all the time.

He blended in with your everyday life in a spance of a week, making you feel as if he had always been there. He helped you with equations you couldn’t solve or lend you pens and pencils, being just at arm’s length whenever you needed something. He acted unobtrusively, respecting your personal boundaries and keeping your relationship formal, and you were grateful for that.

Apart from the lunchbreak, when students had to go down to the canteen to grab some food. You couldn’t bear sitting at the dinner table all alone without Jimin, who tended to misteriously disappear from his desk right after the bell, so you prepared your own food at home and ate it in class. Asking him to take you with him felt pretty intrusive, so you just stuck to doing that, and, considering that there was no one except you usually, you felt fine on your own, not questioning Jimin’s absence too deeply.

Two weeks went by like this: you met in class, hung out together, parting for lunch, then got together after it, and said goodbye when he left home first. That was until one time he forgot his umbrella on the desk and you ran after him only to be hit by a muscular chest right in the face.

Strong hands immediately gripped your shoulders, preventing you from falling, and you were pressed to him tightly as he tried to regain balance. He smelled like cherry and you found it endearing. The boy quickly moved away and let you go as if embarrassed for touching you in the first place.

That’s when you looked at him properly and immediately regretted it.

He was the most attractive boy you had ever seen. The type you were most scared of, because it was 'your’ type. He was your type.

The guy you would definitely notice in a crowd. Type of boyfriend you always dreamed of having.

With thick black hair, all tall and strong. Muscular to the extent of it being noticeable, but not too much. Handsome face, gracious posture and smelling like cherry. Smelling like a treat. Presenting your dirtiest fantasy to life.

'Hey, JK! I told you to wait! Don’t go the-’ You heard Jimin shouting right before he emerged from the corridor. 'Oh, Y/N…’

You had never seen Jimin’s friends before. And, by the way Jimin glanced between the two of you, you supposed he wasn’t really fond of the idea of you meeting one of them.

'Y/N?’ The tall boy uttered, boring into your eyes and making you blush. His attention gave you no pleasure as you shrinked underneath it and not in a good way.

'Jungkook. Let’s go.’ Jimin said firmly, grabbing his umbrella from your hand, whispering a soft 'thank you’ to you and pulling Jungkook away. 'See you tomorrow, okay?’ He offered apologetically as they both moved back into the hall.

You just stood there, staring blankly at their backs while they departed, Jungkook turning his head to look at you again and again while Jimin pushed him forward.

When they disappeared behind the ladder, you had to grab the doorframe not to sink to the floor. Your heart was racing like it was you who just ran there all the way from the first floor and not Jimin.

The next morning you met as usual: Jimin stepped into the empty classroom, arriving early just like you, and took his seat, flashing you a blinding smile before dropping his backpack on the floor. You really wanted to ask him about Jungkook, about who he was and if he would come again later so you could see him once more. And despite feeling utterly flustered just by thinking about being near him again, you couldn’t help but seek for his presence, his face not leaving your thoughts since the moment he touched you. You were undoubtedly interested.

However, every time you tried to start a conversation about Jungkook, Jimin suddenly changed the subject or quickly came up with some urgent business he had to take care of. Eventually, you decided to drop it, afraid of being too pushy and losing your only friendly face among the students.

Days went by, and bearing with school became much easier as you finally broke the ice with some of the classmates. Jimin looked pretty satisfied watching you interact with others as if his job was successfully done.

Among the excitement of being finally accepted by people you almost forgot about Jungkook and the seeds of feelings he planted in you.

That was until he decided to find you first.

#bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #jimin x reader #jungkook x reader #j hope x reader #jung hoseok x reader #jimin x y/n #jimin x you

[loveburnsbrighter]

Like a Blushing Rose

Written for a lovely anon who requested little embarrassing moments :) read it on ao3

"What was that?"

David freezes.  Maybe if he stays really still, Patrick won't be able to see him.

"David," Patrick says with a huff of laughter.  "I can still see you, even when you stand really still."

Okay, fuck that plan, then.  David relaxes.  "What was what?"  He says as breezily as he can manage.  (Nevermind that he's not breezy at his best.)

"David," Patrick says again, in his patented teasing voice.  "Did you belch?"

"Okay, firstly, that's a gross word and I hate it," David clarifies, because Patrick's vocabulary, as it turns out, is atrocious.  "And secondly, no, I did not.  That's a disgusting thing to do in public."

"Is it technically public if it's just us two in here?"  Patrick cocks his head, a show of innocence that's so full of shit, and gestures at the admittedly empty shopping floor.  

David bristles to hide the little shiver that just us two gives him.  "Please don't remind me that we're quiet," he snaps instead.

Patrick just laughs at him.  "Told you the cafe's Super Burrito was a bad idea."  

"You know what, this isn't a discussion we're having," David announces.  He hates how out of control he feels.  He hates that Patrick is having fun humiliating him.  He hates that he actually doesn't hate either of those things, that Patrick's savant-level ability to press all of his buttons with  complete accuracy gives him a little thrill that he's chosen not to poke at thus far.

The thing about the beginning of a relationship is that there's no way of knowing how the other person will react as you slowly become a little more accessible to them, a little more human.  In the scant few weeks they've been dating, David has tried to stay at his filet mignon for Patrick, and now he's unwittingly exposed himself at his Super Burrito.

"David, it's okay," Patrick says gently.  "There's nothing to be embarrassed about."

"Oh my God."  David tosses his hands up.  "How are we still fucking talking about this?"  

He cringes, expecting Patrick to be cowed by this, but he should know better at this point.  Patrick is smiling at him, endeared by David's harshness rather than repelled by it.  "Would it make you feel better if I burped, too?"

David's jaw actually drops in horror.  "No, it would not.  Literally at all."

"Okay," Patrick says, holding his hands up in surrender.  "But I just want you to know that there is really nothing to be embarrassed about.  You can't always control your body, right?"

David really doesn't know how to handle Patrick's blend of teasing and gentle sincerity right now.  Humiliation wars in him with his desire to let it go, because for some reason Patrick hasn't turned away at him, even after doing something as disgusting as — he has to swallow a gag at the thought — belching in public.  Finally, he sighs and looks at Patrick.  "Can we just drop it?  And never bring it up again?"

Patrick's eyes soften, though the teasing smile doesn't slip completely off his face.  "Consider it forgotten," he says.  And when he scrubs a firm hand over David's back, David lets himself think, maybe.  Maybe this, the first guy to still want to touch him after seeing his body betray him, maybe this one will work out.

There's a wet spot on David's shirt.  

It takes him a moment or two to orient himself — they're at Ray's, and Ray is out with a client.  It's their day off from work, and they're on the couch, and they must have fallen asleep watching TV.  Patrick's head is resting on David's chest, and his mouth is slightly open, and… 

Drool.  Patrick has drooled on his shirt.

David is first horrified by the drool on his shirt, because ew, and then he's horrified because in equal measure to his horror, he finds that he's finding this whole thing endearing.  And a bit relieving — finally, a tangible physical flaw, a little imperfection to prove that Patrick is a real person, who apparently drools in his sleep.

It's endearing enough that instead of leaping up and spot cleaning his shirt immediately, David finds himself petting a hand over Patrick's hair.  Patrick snuffles, and David does it again, encouraged.  When he runs his fingers between the shorn strands — not tugging, just seeing how it feels — Patrick sniffs and shifts and blinks awake, and David tugs his hand back guiltily.

"Mm," Patrick says, voice thick, not lifting his head from David's chest, "How long was I asleep?"

"About an hour and a half," David says, petting his hair again.

Patrick groans, wipes his mouth and lifts his head, and then he pauses.  "You got something…"  He points to the wet spot on David's shirt, and then stiffens.  "Oh my God," he says, and covers his face.  "David —"

"It's okay," David assures him, because for some reason it really is.  Because it's Patrick, and David has learned over the past several months that he'll make a lot more allowances for Patrick than he ever could have thought.

"It only happens when I sleep during the day," Patrick says from between his fingers. "I'm so sorry, I'll pay to have your shirt cleaned —"

"Hey," David says, pulling at Patrick's fingers.  "Don't touch your face, it's bad for your skin."  He succeeds in prying Patrick's hands away from his face, which is bright red.  David can't help but touch it; the warmth radiating off Patrick's skin is intoxicating, which is a thought he's interested in chasing down the line — but not right now.  "It's fine, Patrick."

Patrick chances a look up at him with the biggest set of puppy-dog eyes David has ever seen on an adult.  "But your shirt!  You're not mad?"

"I'm as surprised as you are," David tells him with absolute sincerity.  "But I guess…it's kind of…," he takes a long pause, looking for a word.  "Endearing."  He cringes, waiting for Patrick to react.

Patrick reacts by blushing harder, which David thinks is very fun and adorable of him, the bloodrush painting his ears, his neck.  "Okay," he says.  "I'm…really embarrassed," he admits.

"Mm, shocking," David can't help but tease.  "It's okay, Patrick.  I promise."

"Oh, you promise?"  Patrick shuffles up, eyes dropping to David's mouth.

"Mhmm," David says, smiling into the kiss Patrick offers him.  He pulls back and leans his forehead against Patrick's, and he can't help but think that maybe, at this exact second, everything really is okay.

They're driving home from a conference when he sees it.

David generally doesn't attend these sorts of functions, but this one was a one-day affair in Elmdale, there and back without having to stay in a dusty motel (Patrick had hit David with the driest expression in his repertoire when David had expressed this point), and there was a workshop called "The Power of a Cohesive Aesthetic," so David had agreed with what he considers to have been a very modest level of bitching.

The radio is on low and Patrick is relaxed, one hand on the bottom of the wheel and the other on David's thigh, chattering about the Greater Elms Business Association panel he attended, and David can't really be blamed for letting his attention drift a bit; watching Patrick's face move through his excitement is simply much more fun than actually listening to what the CFO of Elm Glenn's premiere laundry facility had to say about bargain buying.  They will not be applying that to the Apothecary, thanks so much.

David lets his gaze drift down Patrick's profile — the slight curl of the hair at his neck that says he's overdue for a cut, the stiff collar of his teal shirt, the strain of the fabric where he's rolled his cuffs up, the long, transparent sticker that reads XL XL XL XL down his chest — 

Wait a second.

"Um, Patrick, honey?"  David says delicately, completely disrupting whatever Patrick was saying about cheaper office supplies — although, actually, if Patrick wants to cut costs, carbon paper and premium colored ink are surely the places to do it.  "Is that a new shirt?"

"Yeah."  Patrick glances at him for a second, one eyebrow raised almost imperceptibly.  "You were with me when I bought this.  Do you not like it?"  He frowns.

David does remember — after being coerced into Kohls on the promise that he wouldn't have to try anything on himself, he'd actually quite enjoyed the little fashion show Patrick had given him, and it had gotten him into slim-fit jeans (he didn't buy them, but, baby steps).  And he remembers thoroughly endorsing this color on Patrick — it brings out his natural coloring a bit, so that even under the harshest fluorescents he doesn't look cadaverous.  That assessment is what probably led Patrick to wear it to a conference at a university, with its stupid economical lighting and paint jobs.

"I love the shirt," David says emphatically, because he doesn't want Patrick stuffing it in the back of his closet, never to be seen again.  "Um, it's just.  You've got a price tag..?"  He reaches over and delicately plucks at a corner of it; it separates from Patrick's chest with a soft ripping sound.  

"Oh my God," Patrick says; his eyes are on the road, but his ears redden considerably.  "Do you think that was there all day?"

"Um.  I don't think it magically appeared there halfway through the day.  So."  David cringes, trying to be sympathetic but unable to imagine leaving the house without checking over his clothes first. 

Patrick's face only flames further.  "I talked to so many people today!  David, I had a whole conversation with the president of the Greater —"

"Greater Elms Business Association, I know," David says, pained that he's in love with a man who cares about the opinion of the Greater Elm's Business Association's president.

"They must have thought I was an idiot," Patrick says miserably, shaking his head at the road.  "Damn it, and I really killed them with that joke about British accountants…"

David grits his teeth over that one.  "I'm sure they didn't notice.  I mean, I didn't notice, and I think I pay just a little more attention to your clothes slash body than the average person?"

Patrick's mouth twists.  "I guess that's true."

"Um, you guess?"  David paws at Patrick's shoulder playfully.  "When we get home I'll get you out of this shirt and prove it to you."  He tries for a sexy growl, knowing the effect will be more goofy (he's not really the growling type) and that it will make Patrick laugh.

He does laugh, just a little bit.  "I know what you're doing, David," he says, smiling sideways at the freeway, "and if you try to distract me now I will send us straight into a guardrail."

David pulls back.  "Wouldn't want that."  But Patrick's blush is almost gone.  "So…what else did you learn at your panel today?"  He knows he'll regret asking, but as Patrick lights back up and launches into a detailed description of whatever it is (so he's already zoning out, can he be blamed?) he's glad that he did.  He laces his fingers with Patrick's and watches his expressions shift and change, and humoring Patrick, pleasing him, lifting him back up is so easy and feels so good that David thinks he could do it for the rest of his life. 

#long post #fanfiction #david x patrick

[innittowinit]

Abandoned amusement parks are the best place for young children (Chapter 4)

fic summary: Techno, Tommy, Wilbur and Phil have been hanging out at the abandoned amusement park in the woods since they moved in. Techno likes knowing he's definitely alone with his brothers Tommy likes climbing on the old rides Wilbur likes having a place to play his music Phil likes spending time with his younger brothers 

That is, until a group of brothers calling themselves the 'dream team' move in down the road. Will the sleepy boys give in and share the park or will they succeed in scaring the new kids off?

chapter summary:  With their parent's out for the night, Phil has to watch his brothers, after learning about what the real situation with Tubbo getting hurt was, he starts to question how responsible his brothers really are

chapter word count: 2236

AO3 

“We’re going to be out for the night, Phil’s in charge. Our numbers are on the fridge if anything happens okay?” Their Mom had given them each a hug and a kiss on the forehead as she and their father got ready to leave.

“Don’t stay up too late. Make sure Tommy’s in bed by seven, Wil and Techno you can stay up till 11. Phil, I trust you to not need me to give you a bedtime. Everyone be good for Phil, bye bye now”

And like that, they were alone; 3 teenagers and a toddler left unsupervised. 

Phil was used to looking after his little brothers though, he loved it, he thought they were sweet, even when they were being bratty or whatever it was that they called tantrums nowadays. Perhaps he had grown up a little fast, he himself was only 16 but he felt much older, protecting the younger ones had always been something important to him. 

“We should probably just order something to eat, I doubt you lot want to wait for me to cook anything anyway right?” Sniggering, he took Tommy by the hand and led him back to the living room, just wanting to keep him busy since it was a little late to let him go out to play. 

“Pizza sounds good” Techno hummed as he followed in, Wilbur by his side. The twins sat on opposite ends of the sofa, resting their legs on the middle seat, at least, until Tommy decided he wanted to be like his big brothers and climbed up into the middle seat too.  

“Phil! I want pizza too!” Tommy grinned, trying to mimic the way Techno was sitting. To Phil, it was an adorable sight but it did annoy Wilbur and Techno, just the slightest, since he wouldn’t sit still. Eventually, Techno just decided to put an arm around him and give him the attention he very clearly wanted, the boy finally sitting still once he had the comfort of his big brother. 

“Alright! It’s settled then! Be quiet while I phone up the place”

Flicking through the channels, the three youngest very quickly discovered that absolutely nothing good was on TV. Since it was in the evening, most of the kids channels had started playing the less popular shows that seemed to freak Tommy out a bit, so that was a bust, and all the more adult channels were either playing news or some random show that none of them wanted to watch. It took about 10 minutes of aimlessly channel surfing, and Phil returning to the room, before Wil decided that they should just put a movie on. 

And so the same situation happened with Netflix, Wilbur scrolling through all the movies until Phil decided enough was enough and chose for them.

It was Spirited Away, perfect since it was both suitable for Tommy and interesting enough that Wilbur and Techno would enjoy it too. 

It wasn’t until about halfway through the film that the doorbell was rung, a little tune playing throughout the house as Phil stood up to go get it, a little unspoken agreement that since Tommy was still a little young to be talking to strangers, and Wil and Techno still didn’t really like being in different rooms, it would always be him to grab it when their parents were out. He didn’t really mind anyway though. 

After paying for the pizza and closing the door, Phil went into the living room and paused the movie. 

“We were watching that big man” Tommy grumbled, lifting his head a little from where it had been rested in Techno’s side, only for his face to light up when he saw that Phil had the pizza. Food wasn’t allowed in the living room, that was one of the house rules and while Phil didn’t mind bending them a little while they were out of the house, if they made a mess while Phil was in charge, he’d be the one in trouble. 

It was understandable though, a seven year old and two thirteen year old’s weren’t exactly a recipe for a clean house. 

As Tommy ran past him to get to the kitchen, Phil nodded to the two boys who still sat on the couch. 

“Up, you two, If i let you eat in here then Tommy will too. Do you really wanna deal with Mum and Dad going on about Tomato sauce on their sofa?”

“...No” And so Techno got up and wherever Techno went, Wil was sure to follow. 

--

After sharing out the Pizza and making sure they all had some water, Phil sat down at the table, smiling at his brothers. From the looks of Tommy he was absolutely right to now let them eat in the living room. How does the pizza sauce even end up on your forehead? 

He’d have to make sure he washed his face properly after dinner. 

“What did you guys do at school today then?” It was a dull question but he was genuinely interested in how things were going, kids could be ruthless, especially for people like Wil and Techno. As their older brother, he wanted to make sure nobody was picking on them. 

“It was alright, Nothing big happened I guess” Shrugging, Wil shoved some pizza into his mouth, after a glance at Techno, who just shrugged as well, Phil concluded that the kids were probably nice and the day had just been a bit mundane. 

“Tommy then, how was your da-”

“So good!” The boy yelled as if he had been waiting for his turn to talk, he was getting a lot better at not talking over people which Phil liked. 

“Tubbo has a scar on his knee from when we went to L’manburg together and he looks super tough! We didn’t say where he got it from though! See! We’re super duper good at keeping secrets!”

“Tubbo has a scar? I thought it was just a graze”

Sighing, he turned his attention back to Wilbur. He knew he was barely a teenager, he had only tuned 13 a few months ago but still, he expected a little better from his brothers if they were going to take Tommy and his friends out. Even if they wanted their alone time, they still should have had a little more responsibility. 

Phil couldn't remember much from when he was 13, he supposed his little brothers didn’t have the same protective instincts as he did since he had always looked out for them all, maybe he did baby them a bit but he cared about them so much. He thought he was teaching them how they could care for people too.  

“I’m a little disappointed in you two, I’m not going to lie”

Choking back a laugh, Techno slapped his hand on the table. 

“How is it our fault that Tommy and his friend got themselves into trouble? Tommy never gets hurt so we trusted him!” 

“Techno stop yelling” His voice was calm and collected. He wanted to get mad, he wanted to yell but he knew that wouldn’t accomplish anything, that would just make the situation worse. 

“Tommy never gets hurt because I don’t let him climb high enough that he does get hurt. Now I know you two like your privacy and I respect that, but you can’t seriously expect me to let it slide that you took two seven year olds out with you and one of them came back with a scar?”

“He wasn’t even badly hurt! Techno cleaned it out and everything” 

“Wilbur, he's seven. I don’t think I’m asking a big thing if I’m asking you to supervise at least a little while taking your little brother and his friend out.”

“Why should Techno and I be responsible if Tubbo fell over?! Kids fall over all the time”

“That's not the po-” 

“Yes it is! It’s not fair! Tommy is perfectly fine there on his own. How were we supposed to know that Tubbo wouldn’t be?” 

“Because he’s a kid Wilbur! He’s a kid and most families don’t let their children run off in abandoned amusement parks for fun, okay?”

He regretted it as soon as the words left his mouth. He never should have yelled, he never should have lost his temper. And now, as Wil looked at him with wide eyes, he was paying the price. 

“Fuck this.”

As the room filled with thick, thick tension, Wilbur looked around the table before slamming his hands down, storming out of the kitchen and up to his and Techno’s bedroom. 

“..Tech’ I don’t suppose you’ve got a different opinion? Something maybe a little less angry?”

To Phil’s surprise, Techno’s mouth stayed shut. He was just sitting there, staring wide eyed at Wilbur’s empty seat.  

That’s when it hit him, Wilbur had left Techno. The oldest sighed, trying his hardest to come up with a plan where everybody could be happy. 

“Okay..Okay, Tommy do you wanna finish watching the movie while to talk to these two” 

Tommy didn’t answer either, that was less concerning though since he knew Tommy was fine with talking normally. After getting the youngest set up in the living room, making sure he was snuggled under the blanket with his favourite stuffed toy, he went back to Techno and motioned for him to get up. 

“I know it’s scary, we’re going to talk to Wilbur”

Wordlessly, Techno got up and went to Phil. 

God, he forgot just how young they were sometimes, they were usually so mature. To not even be speaking to him and Tommy right now, Techno must be extremely scared. Fuck. Why did he have to lose his temper like that? He couldn’t even be mad at Wil for running off, he was just a kid who didn’t like being yelled at. 

But so was Phil. 

“I wish there was more I could do to help you y'know? I really love all of you and I wish I could make things like this easier for you” 

Techno didn’t say a word, instead he just held onto Phil’s hand. Knowing it was usually Wilbur who he went to for this kind of comfort, Phil smiled a little, it reminded him that Techno hadn’t suddenly decided he didn’t love them, he just needed his brother with him to show it verbally. That was fine as far as Phil was concerned. He was working through the speaking issues with his speech therapist so as long as he made progress there, he’d never try to push him here. He wanted home to be somewhere he could relax. Hopefully that was the right decision.

“Wil? It’s me and Techno” 

Phil sighed as he knocked on the door. He felt horrible for talking to Wil the way he had. 

“Look, I know I upset you. You’re just a kid and I can’t expect you and Techno to be able to be completely responsible for everything Tommy and Tubbo do. I’m well aware that they can be little devils.” 

He heard shuffling from the other side of the door, whether that was a good sign or not wasn’t clear to him right now. 

“I really love all of you and the idea that Tommy could have been in danger while I wasn’t there really scared me. I shouldn’t have taken that out on you two” 

More shuffling, then the sound of the door unlocking. Finally, it opened to reveal Wilbur, with puffy red eyes, the sound of some sad indie band playing out of his laptop speakers. Upon seeing his twin, Techno let go of Phil and wormed his way past Wilbur so he could be next to him instead. It felt safe. 

“I’m sorry too.. You were right, we should have been looking after them better. I guess I didn’t want to hear it. And I’m sorry to you too Tech’, it was selfish of me to run off without thinking about how it would affect you” 

“Nah it’s fine” Techno spoke and Phil felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest, although he knew it was stupid, he had to admit he had been worried that Techno wouldn't ever speak in front of them again. He was extremely glad that that wasn’t the case. 

“Yeah but Phil we were being kinda shitty.. Wil kinda already said everything I was thinking though so I can’t say anything without sounding like I’m copying” 

Phil chuckled, at last the heavy atmosphere was gone. He had his happy little family back. 

After pulling the duo into a hug for a few seconds, he checked his watch. 

“Tommy’s downstairs all alone watching spirited away if you two are up for coming back down and finishing it with him? There’s still an hour before I’m putting him to bed”

---

The four all ended up snuggled together on the same sofa. Wilbur in the middle, Techno on his left, Phil on his right and Tommy somehow spread out across all of their laps, until the movie started to freak him out, that is, because then he had moved over to get some Phil snuggles. 

“I love you guys. Don’t argue any more” The youngest had mumbled out, and with how much they spoiled the kid, if he asked for it, his older brother’s almost always gave him it. This definitely seemed like something they could give him.

#technoblade #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #tubbo #philza #mcyt #mineblr #sleepyblr #sbi #sleepyboisinc #sleepy bois inc #fanfic

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaoldretired]

some p!g-drv3 theories (spoilers obvi)

First of all I think people demonize the pg versions wayyy too much because its a good way to be le sexy in like fanfictions. And i get it, villains are hot or whatever. and also hs is a horny age to be. But even the edgiest and horniest of teens aren’t like. that sexual/monstrous. its kind of insane the portrayals people are placing

maybe this could also be like me being older bc when i was early hs i was like yea its fair to place these super mature portrayals on a 18-22 year old they are like adults but young and now im that age and im like woah there pardner. might be an age/maturity thing. 

also like its normal for people to relate to and portray characters their same age in a similar fashion, but when adults write more sexual content about the dg kids i get hella fucking sus

idk where i was going with that first comment i guess its like a preface and in the end i think its important when characters especially teenage characters are morally grey not because they’re mature and dark/brooding but because they are still young and learning. fuck im older than like most of them, but im still young and learning. its good to be in turmoil and confused, especially the drv3 cast. they are more confused than anything.

which i think is a reason why people would join dr because if you are completely loss and in turmoil, it is appealing to be given a purpose in life and amazing talents/abilities. despite the morals of danganronpa, it is a simple reality to be told who you are and what to do

OK ONTO HEADCANONS (not doing all bc i dont have thoughts about all)

first of all i understand changing stories but i think, deep down, you can’t change fundamental personalities/values. so while the backstories might be different i think, in the end, a baseline is always the same

SHUICHI being a Bad Boy is like canon obviously but i dont think he’s as manipulative as people make him out to be. i think he falls in the more the bully role that like. mae borowski or tf2′s scout filled before they grew up. rough background, bad anger issues, lots of emotional turmoil, and the only way he knows how to deal with shit is by committing crimes and beating the shit out of people. and, similar to those characters, drv3 represents an older, more emotionally sober yet equally confused version of himself. the urges are still there as foreshadowed in the dialogue. i think he struggles with guilt, mostly survivors, but there is still a lasting impact of guilt of what he did in his past, even if he can’t remember.

KOKICHI is a child. a piece of shit motherfucker child but a child. I really do think he’s like one of the youngest people in the cast. he reminds me a lot of when my brother doesn’t take his adhd medicine and takes jokes way too far and does mean and cruel things because he thinks its funny and that its just a fun joke, but is hurting people. he desperately wants approval, which is why his leader role is so interesting because in the dr narrative he has the approval he craves and so he is satisfied. still, he does try to impress characters like rantaro and values his opinions a lot, even developing a brotherly relationship in the time they knew each other. this being said, its established kokichi was bullied before, but i dont think he’s like. the wimp people make him out to be. i think he’s more of like the class clown who desperately uses humor to make people like him, and ends up resorting to be the butt of most of his jokes. you don’t just develop a good sense of humor out of a brainwash, and that’s not something you can program in. i think that was a remnant of before, and he’s so good at bullying people and coming up with roasts - i just think that in p!g the roasts were about him.

KAEDE is baby but her p!g personality seriously reminds me of any ~quirky/edgy~ girl in a teen coming of age story who tries to be edgy and cool and act like she doesn’t care but deep down, she really does. if she didn’t have an empathetic personality, she wouldn’t want to end the game. i also think she has that self-identifying QuIrKy personality because its like she lives in her own narrative, practically announcing this story is about her and she is the protagonist. i know i used to self narrate like that and distinguish how i was different when i was like. 15-16. she has a tumblr. 

I really like the theory where KAITO is a make-a-wish kid who was better when he was younger but relapses later in teens. he never used his wish before, so he decides to use it now to be on danganronpa and become the hero he always wanted to be. i also think he might have joined as a way to raise awareness about adolescent healthcare. definitely the type who puts on a “heroic” character to make everyone else feel better about the fact he is literally dying of a terminal illness, and keeps that act up till the end. 

i think KOREKIYO is still a serial killer. i think honestly a reason why he mightve auditioned for danganronpa is because he is a serial killer. maybe his sister found out and he felt so much shame that’s why he auditioned. he probably mentioned why in his interview because duh, tell them im a serial killer and then only reason im coming clean is my sister found out and im ashamed, that is like a guarantee to get on the show.  i LOVE the theory that his sister is still alive, however, and has to watch her brother go insane because they wrote her into the story as the villain. because technically, she brought on this guilt, and is the reason why he auditioned - as a way to cause despair, twist it around so she’s the one to blame for his insanity. also, because its pretty accepted DR members become celebrities, kork’s sister is totally bombarded with paparazzi and is demonized in the media. she might end up writing a tell-all memoir about kork’s actual childhood and personality. quiet kid, thoughtful, interested in anthropology, she never thought he’d hurt a fly. watching her brother go insane probably destroyed her. 

I also think, timeline wise, kork is probably one of the oldest members along with rantaro. tbh i think kork actually graduated hs and went on a gap year doing the whole “hitchhike around the world to discover myself thing” which is where he began killing people. he was getting ready to go to college when his sister found out about what he did. this is when he decided to go on danganronpa instead of university. this would help explain why he knows so much about other cultures/travel/been so many places with so many memories/killed/is knowledgable on a level most other students are not. this would place him at like, 20-21, where everyone else is like 15-18.

ok so there’s two p!g RANTARO, p!g before 53 and p!p!g before 52. i’d like to establish now i think rantaro is the oldest of the characters, seeing as though he was already pretty old to begin with in 52, it takes time between television seasons, and he was in another game. so im placing him like 21-23, similar to yasuhiro in d1 being so much older than everyone else. i do think, in all iterations, rantaro was pretty much raising his sisters, though i don’t think he had twelve like the story (i think that’s an exaggeration, his sisters mean a lot to him, lets make him have a TON and then lose them all and feel GUILTY) rantaro joined the first game, partially to get money for his family and hopefully establish them as celebrities and let them have a comfy lifestyle, even if he doesn’t live...and also to finally ahve some sort of experience without his siblings tagging along. if he’s been raising his sisters all his life, he’s never had like something that’s JUST his. that’s his adventure. 52 is his ULTIMATE adventure. ahaha. mostly for money, kind of dreading it, still a tiny bit excited

ok p!g rantaro between 52 and 53 probably came back broken. he did the signings and appearances, but mostly wanted to spend time with his family and make sure they were set up. i think he knew the whole like few months between seasons he had to go on another show, but he did’t tell his sisters. his family found out when they saw a billboard with his face plastered on it hyping up the return of a fan favorite. yikes!

ok i get it a lot of people hate HIMIKO but i think she’s not nearly as similar as other “useless” characters in other games. its like, pretty clear she’s depressed, and the only thing she’s holding onto with dear life is magic. lack of hygiene, lack of personal care, constantly tired, social interaction exhausts - she has depression, but she’s not an UWU depressed character. so people find her depressive traits (which are some of the most realistic portrayals of mental health in the series) SUPER annoygin. she joined dr because she was completely lost and needed some sort of direction in her life, even if she’ll die for it. the thing is, even with direction, her mental state didn’t change because she wasn’t getting legitimate help. it’s like that one SNL skit that’s like. same sad you from before but in a new place. i also think she knows the magic is not real, because how could she not. i think she’s so adamant that it IS real, less as a way to convince others, and more of a way to convince herself. it’s like really super cruel that team danganronpa took a girl who is desperate for meaning and gave her literally a meaningless, fake talent.

i also kin himiko and find her a comfort character because i feel seen by her, replacing her useless talent of magic with mine of like shitty film making and comedy. i am seen.

related i don’t think she’s nearly as ugly as everyone says she is, i think she’s probably just depressed and takes absolutely no care of her hygiene and sleep and looks like sick and greasy all the time. same queen.

honest to god i think RYOMA’s backstory, tennis and all, is like 100% real and he’s the only one who keeps all of his memories except for the fact this is a tv show. i think he rolled up, a hot fucking mess, and the danganronpa team were like damn. we cannot improve upon this. 

#ryoma hoshi #himiko yumeno #rantaro amami #korekiyo shinguji #kaito momota #kaede akamatsu #shuichi saihara #kokichi ouma #drv3 #killing harmony #pg dr #pre!game danganronpa #danganronpa #theories #danganronpa spoilers

[archtroop]

So just binged Titans (2018) on Netflix and -

I want to say stuff. Lets start with the basics. I’m not a hardcore DC comics fan. I’m your occasional TV viewer who watched Teen Titans, and loved the Batman cartoons. I’m your ordinary Joe. That would mean, for me, this show is my introduction into these characters. I’m viewing these stories as manifestations of archetypes, I am not familiar with “classic” characterizations, or “the right way of this one to talk” and so on.

I enjoyed the show a lot. Like, I literally binged the whole two seasons in the expense of some very cherished sleep time. It sucked me in.

And I became very curious about the backgrounds of the characters, and I looked some of it up (fucked up stuff! good!) and I was interested in maybe some reviews or hardcore fans sating their... say.

And. Guys. Guys.

So much negativity? Over... it being too violent?... Too dark...? Too... new?

I watched this show right now with virgin eyes. And I have to say that, 

A. Dick Grayson of this Titans is the definition of “Dick Move”, and is literally trope co founder. And I love it. GO GRAY MORALITY GO. Also his introduction was. GOOD STUFF. I am rooting for this broken brain. His choices and inner struggles were very intriguing to watch, also his choices, morals and oh overall, a beautiful rendition of an adult, a grownup person that comes to terms with some very fucked up implicaitons.

B. For all the reviewers trashing Raven, calling her OOC and HotTopicRaven, guys, F U I loved her, I loved Teen Titans Raven as a kid, and this one is 16 and goddammit she is allowed to be emo and rock her style. And that she does. The “possession” thing she has is creepy cringe AWESOME STUFF. She rocks it, The actress ROCKS IT. Her whole journey was so engaging. TEAM RAVEN!

C. I was not familiar with Hawk and Dove, but I’m here rooting for them. Like full on SHIP THAT SHIP. I want them to be together, and I don’t care they broke my heart and then patched it up and I’m here for this couple.

D. Gar. OH PRECIOUS GAR, thanQ for righting the wrongs of decades of werepeople by transforming in and out while naked. I’m just so so grateful for this, but also, SO SO likable and the amount of empathy that was dragged out of me for the poor dude, I just want more screen time of him doing whatever he wants to do. I will literally watch an episode of Gar making various veggie shakes. I would. But also I want him to have more plot. Like, yesterday.

E. Kory/Starfire. Whoever trashes her costumes, go sleep on some legos. She rocks it, the actress rocks it, SHE ROCKS THAT RING ON HER LONG BEAUTIFUL FINGERS, and if anyone even dares to oink anything about her being black as apologetic, I say F U, she literally ABSORBS SUN POWER in this version, that melanin is rightfully hers. Also if you want to call me racist have fun, but I love the idea that genetics are applied with scientific purposes rather then, just, um, representation fodder launching pad. Fuck this shit, SHE IS THE SUN, GORGEOUS SUN. I love her discovery of self, maybe a hasty one. but damn poignant. I enjoyed her way of going around not remembering who she is. I root for her and her upcoming clash with her sister.

D. Donna. I kinda felt she will be in and then out and I didn’t really get attached to her BUT she was introduced as this very independent and firmly grounded person, and I was so happy to see her keeping her ground, good for her.

E. Jason Todd. Now here is a surprise. What a bomb of character that one. Now after doing minimal research about the fucked up origins of that one, I wasn’t surprised to see how he is probably the most twist and broken mess of them all. And he is the embodiment of DC’s wrongs, so it seems. This one is the ghost that Corp couldn’t get rid of or something. This one carries so so much nuance. But what really got me is how ensemble DarkHorse this one is. The actor is amazing. It reminds me how Dylan O’Brien of Teen Wolf out-shined the ever-living crap out of his co-stars cast back in the day. This one has similar energy. I literally squeezed on my couch into a little bulb of fright and pity when he had his outburst in front of Rose. His violence is so spot on brutal - I mean, while Dick’s violence is vicious, this one is brutal and I’m here for this. Also, his very introduction? Shivers down my spine and that feeling of “shit he had it REAL BAD as a kid. THE WORST”.

E.02 I... don’t care for Rose. Right now anyway. Maybe later on with her half brother as her copilot in S3? We’ll see. For now...? meh Sorry. 

F. Conner. From the very moment the name Superman was dropped I was like, there is going to be a supersomething. Now I am not familiar with all the comics and I barely remember Teen Titans, but I am on tumblr, so. OK his origins are creepy AF, also intriguing, and Lex, you obsessed fucker. GOOD. But then Jason was falling of the building and it was literally 2+2 “oh Conner is gonna save the poor soul”, but oh no they had to go full-on “catch you as you fall Lois Lane style” but except no flying up - instead crashing on a car. This character, just broke out of a laboratory, had a random journey, and was alive for like two days in total just to be at the right time at the right place to save Jason falling from that building? ?? What am I suppose to do with this information??? I mean, Someone DID THIS.  And I mean, that is kinda spot on.  The writers should be VERY CAREFUL NOW with that, coz it can be either beautiful stuff or a very gruesome publicity fodder. 

G. THEME. This Titans is. HORRIFICALLY IN YOUR FACE OOZES DARK TRAUMA AND CHILD ABUSE. While watching it I lost count of either abused/used children and crappy fathers. Dick is introduced while investigating a child abuse case. Raven was literally conceived so her demonic father could pass through her into this world. AND SO ON. And that literally includes Bruce and Dick themselves under that category, as the bad fathers. GOOD STUFF. You should really meditate on that. The amount of usage of children under the hands of adults in all the verity of forms, from sexual assault and rape and whatever violence to selling for profit (Conner is brainwashed and has a bid put on him, as a soldier for sale. He is a few weeks old.) is shockingly overwhelming. Like, this is THE THEME. Obviously this is a Found Family Trope kind of show, but oh my GOD they all are running from is just like, I dunno a mass of horny catholic priests? 

IN CONCLUSION

Titans may have a messy output with many plots but it is not that hard to follow. It’s not just darker and edgier, it’s just NOT THAT COMIC. This seems to be a show that might tackle some of the darkest stuff media doesn’t outright... tackles. It’s more then just “oh crap daddy issues”. It has the actual feeling of  “I will not be avenged. How do I move forward. Who needs me, who do I need to heal?” If it plays it right, it can be a thing of beauty. Or, if it will hear to all those negative shallow reviews, it will go crashing down in shamble. 

Signed, a satisfied, average viewer. 

#titans #netflix titans #titans 2018 #I have more on my mind but need to wrap up

[batwake]

Muddle Through Somehow - reddie

ao3 link

summary: Eddie doesn’t know Richie Tozier, per se. Eddie knows him just about as well as Eddie knows the Queen of England, or Jake Gyllenhaal. That was to say, Eddie knew very little about Richie Tozier and also knew a great deal.

or, the one where Eddie doesn't like Christmas and it is Richie's goal to get him to accept some holiday cheer.

Eddie had never really liked Christmas, all things considered. The decorations were annoying, the music was dull and repetitive, peppermint was gross, and the concept of Santa just seemed creepy. The Christmas of his childhood wasn’t the commercial, happy one that was constantly shoved in his face nowadays, either, filled more with awkward silence and advent candles.

Beverly and Ben’s annual Christmas party got bigger and bigger every year, and by the time they were well into two years of marriage and owned their own apartment, it was less of a casual affair between their small group of friends and more of a legitimate, adult house party, complete with their coworkers, extended family, and hors d'oeuvres. They had a real Christmas tree! And lights were strung up around the house and on the lamppost in front of the house, like they were in one of the movies they used to mock and take a shot every time something cliche happened on screen.

Back when Christmas hadn’t been so bad, when the six of them were in college and the party was just them, several bottles of alcohol, and shitty made-for-tv Christmas movies, Eddie had almost looked forward to this night.

Eddie looked wistfully over at Stanley and Mike, who were pouring drinks into clear glasses, not red solo cups like they once had. “I at least had hope that you’d be just as miserable as me.”

Stan, who was wearing a sweater that read ‘HAPPY HANUKKAH YA FILTHY SCHMUCK’ over a pristine white collared shirt, shrugged and passed his boyfriend a glass. “It’s fun.”

“I think Bev is starting to call it a non-denominational-holiday party,” Mike chimed in, looking pointedly out the door of the kitchen where the hustle and bustle of the party was. “But that might’ve been to piss off her ‘put the Christ back in Christmas’ boss.”

Speaking of, Eddie needed to call his mother. Sonia Kasprak was probably wasting away sitting by her phone, waiting for her son to call and wish her a merry Christmas Eve. Eddie’s face must have shown some sign, as Stan reaches over to pat his back. “Don’t think too hard about it, Eddie. Just drink and have fun.”

The pair left the kitchen after that, into the party that Eddie felt worse about attending by the second.

Eddie followed, unsure of what else he could do, awkwardly waving a hand or muttering hello to those he recognized and some he didn’t, towards the couches where those he really knew were sitting.

On the couches, Bill and Ben were talking animatedly to each other, probably about some building Ben is designing or an article that Bill has had published. Next to them were Audra and Beverly, looking lovingly at their husbands over glasses of wine. A familiar figure was splayed across the armchair, one long leg tossed over the arm and the other up on the coffee table, a Santa hat pulled over most of his face. Eddie knew who it was immediately, the curly black hair splayed underneath the Santa hat and trashy converse dead giveaways.

Eddie doesn’t know Richie Tozier, per se. Eddie knows him just about as well as Eddie knows the Queen of England, or Jake Gyllenhaal. That was to say, Eddie knew very little about Richie Tozier and also knew a great deal — like his curly hair and crooked teeth are immensely charming — but doesn’t know how he takes his coffee or if he has any opinions on Olympic figure skating. Eddie didn’t even know how Beverly and Ben knew Richie, only that he started showing up around their house a year ago and never really left.

“Hey Richie,” said Stan, leaning over and flicking the white ball at the end of the hat. Eddie took a long drink of whatever Mike had made him (thankfully no peppermint), looking at Richie as the man in question tugged the hat off his head and shoved his glasses back onto his face.

“Stan my man! I didn’t know the party had arrived.” Richie threw a careless arm up into the air, almost smacking Ben’s mother in the face. “L’Chaim!”

Stan and Mike sat on the floor between the couch and the armchair, leaving Eddie hovering awkwardly. Richie exchanged pleasantries with Mike and Stan briefly, before looking to Eddie. “Spaghetti! It’s been a while since I’ve seen you!” Richie swung his arm out again in an attempt to grab Eddie, but was too far away and nearly slipped out of the chair.

Eddie racked his memory to remember the last time he saw Richie. They’d only met a handful of times, the most recent being Richie passed out on the Hanscom’s couch, only awoken to Eddie dropping off some paperwork for Beverly. (They hadn’t said much to each other. Richie said that Bev and Ben weren’t home. Eddie gave Richie the paperwork and told him to have Bev call him. Richie, still slightly drunk from the previous night, had dropped all the paper on the table and fallen back asleep)

“It’s Eddie,” he said, choosing not to think about how little he really knew about Richie outside of all the times they’d run into each other in varying states of drunkness. They shared a long, lingering look before Eddie turned away, back towards the kitchen and far away from romantic holiday air of the living room.

-

The tiny balcony outside of Ben and Beverly’s apartment was cold, but at least it was absent of Christmas cheer. Snow was falling over the city of New York, lightly and not even enough to stick on the ledge, but it was a nice distraction.

The door behind him could be heard sliding open and closed, All I Want For Christmas Is You becoming louder for a few moments before quieting again. “I think I’m going to leave soon,” Eddie starts, looking over his shoulder expecting to see Bev, or Mike. He doesn’t expect to see Richie Tozier looking at him with a cocky smirk.

“Mariah Carey not your style?” Richie sat down in the metal chair next to Eddie, kicking his feet up against the brick ledge.

“Christmas music, in general, isn’t my style.”

Richie looks aghast. “At all? No Frosty the Snowman or Blue Christmas?”

“No.” Eddie forces his gaze away from Richie, who is being swallowed by a green army coat that he wasn’t wearing earlier. At least the Santa hat is gone. If Eddie closed his eyes and forced his brain away from this stupid balcony, he could almost pretend he was at home by himself and it wasn’t Christmas eve anymore.

“What about How The Grinch Stole Christmas? You’re acting a lot like him.” Eddie rolled his eyes and kicked at one of the legs of the chair Richie was on. “Oh, come on. There’s gotta be a Christmas song you like.”

Eddie gave Richie a flat look. “Why are you out here?”

Shrugging, Richie glances over at him. Blue eyes meet Eddie’s brown ones. “Cause I feel like it. Why do you hate me?”

The question is abrupt, making Eddie’s eyebrows shoot up. He sputters a little, then, “I don’t hate you.”

“You act like you do.”

“I don’t know you!”

Richie sits up and leans over the ledge, looking down at the empty street below them. He doesn’t sound angry, or upset. Just curious. “I’d like you to know me.”

Eddie feels the urge to kick his chair again. “I still don’t understand why you’re out here.”

Throwing his hands up again, Richie looks over at him. There’s a smile on his face. “That’s what someone who hates me would say!”

“You’re impossible.”

“Come on, ask me anything.”

Quiet befalls them. Eddie isn’t sure what to say. After a few minutes pass, neither of them moving to further the conversation (Eddie too nervous, Richie seemingly content to sit in uncomfortable silence), Eddie stands. “Well, I’m going to leave now.”

Richie stands too. “I’ll walk with you.” His smile lights up the dimly lit balcony. “We’re going to be friends even if I die trying, Spaghetti.”

-

Eddie very quickly learns that Richie talks endlessly. That’s not so much a surprise, they’ve met on multiple occasions, after all, but he hadn’t been expecting this. Incessant babble and chatter. As soon as they’re out of the building Richie launches into the story of the time he met a magician in the park around the corner, or when he got food poisoning from the Thai restaurant a few blocks over. Eddie isn’t bothered so much. It’s a nice distraction.

Every once in a while Richie reaches up and shakes the snow out of his curly hair. Eddie isn’t ashamed to admit that it’s cute.

“So,” Richie starts after he finishes explaining his brief stint as his high school football team’s quarterback, “thought of a Christmas song you like yet?”

“Surprisingly, no.” Eddie kicks a chunk of snow across the sidewalk and into the road, watching as it breaks into pieces. “No such exist.”

Richie steps in front of Eddie, stopping both of them in their tracks. Richie takes advantage of their height difference and grabs Eddie by the shoulders, shaking him. “Edward Joseph Kasprak—”

“Not my middle name.”

“—I swear to God by the end of the night, not only will we be very best friends, you will like a Christmas song.”

Eddie wiggled himself free and stepped around Richie. “Whatever you say. Say, how do you take your coffee?”

Turns out Richie Tozier takes his coffee with extensive cream and sugar. The twenty-four-hour coffee shop is luckily open, but Eddie and Richie are the only customers at ten pm on Christmas Eve. They leave quickly after they get their drinks, not wanting to bother the poor teenage girl behind the counter who looked ready to commit second-degree murder when they walked in.

“Do you have any opinions on Olympic figure skating?” asks Eddie, once Richie has fallen back into step with him after holding the door open.

Richie doesn’t hesitate to answer. “I have a framed photo of Tonya Harding.” Eddie snorts into his coffee. Richie continues, “okay, maybe not, but I do love that woman.”

They sit on a bench and drink their coffee, Richie naming as many Christmas songs as he can find.

“Most Wonderful Time Of The Year?”

“It’s not.”

“Last Christmas?”

“It’s basically every other breakup song, why does it have to be Christmas themed?”

“Dominic The Donkey?”

Eddie rolled his eyes as he took a long sip.

“Jingle Bells? Sleigh Ride?”

“Sleigh bells are tacky.”

“Silver Bells.”

“Blegh. Reminds me of my mother.”

“Baby It’s cold outside.”

“Rape-y.”

“Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas.”

Pause. Eddie thinks for a moment. Then, “don’t know it.”

Richie, who had been scrolling through a list on his phone, honest to God, throws the damn thing. Eddie jumps at the sound of the phone hitting the concrete, his fingers tightening around the paper cup. “Jesus Christ, why did you do that?”

Richie walks over to grab it from where it landed by a trash can. The screen doesn’t appear any more cracked than it had been, which was to say, it was cracked quite a bit, but Richie doesn’t seem so bothered. Instead, he sits back on the bench, closer to Eddie than he was previously. “I can’t believe you don’t know this one.” He hums a high and sweet tune, looking expectantly at Eddie.

Shrugging his shoulders, Eddie leans his head back to look towards the sky so his face won’t be so close to Richie’s.

“We are listening to this right the fuck now.”

Eddie could feel Richie’s breath on his neck, and his arm on his back where it rested on the back of the bench. Snowflakes landed on his face, the warm flush of his cheeks causing them to melt immediately. Eddie wondered if Richie was having the same hyper-awareness.

Apparently not, as the song in question started to play once Richie pulled it up on his phone, tinny and small through the speakers.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas, let your heart be light, next year all our troubles will be out of sight. Have yourself a merry little Christmas, make the yuletide gay. Next year all our troubles will be miles away.

Eddie finally looked back down at Richie, who was humming along. His glasses were foggy.

“I like it,” said Eddie, looking away and focusing on the music. It was sweet. Wasn’t commercialized or overdone or extraordinary. Eddie could close his eyes and imagine himself wrapped up in a blanket by the fire, Richie beside him telling him stories, this song playing on a record far away.

Jesus, Richie was turning him soft. They hadn’t even really been friends two hours ago. Now, Eddie felt like he knew more about Richie than any other person he’d met. He knew about the route Richie takes to work, how he met Beverly on the long train ride, and his two cats (“Thor and Loki, cutest cats in the world. Don’t tell Loki he’s adopted, though.”). Minute details, like Richie’s habit of tugging on the curls that hang around the right side of his face, or that his phone password was 742443, but he messes it up a lot.

“You’ve officially accomplished one of your goals tonight,” Eddie whispered once the song was over and Richie was shoving his phone into his coat pocket.

“What, are we not best friends yet?”

Eddie hums.

“There will be a quiz at the end of the night, Edward. You better hit the books.” Richie jumps as Eddie hits his arm. “Not what I meant.”

As he goes to stand, Eddie extends his hand. “We’re almost to my apartment. And it’s almost midnight, which means that it’s almost Christmas.”

Richie’s eyebrows raise and he doesn’t comment right away. Instead, he slides his cold fingers into Eddie’s and follows his lead. He waits until after they’ve turned the corner to say, “why do you hate Christmas so much?”

Thinking, Eddie tries to keep himself grounded by focusing on Richie’s hand, its warmth slowly starting to spread from where they connect and through Eddie’s body. “The Christmas of my childhood was always just my mother shoving religion down my throat. In high school and college it always seemed so lonely, the one time of the year where everyone was busy doing things with their family, so I was stuck with my mother. It’s just never felt like the good thing that everyone chopped it up to be.” It hadn’t always been so bad. After college, there were some Christmases where Eddie and his friends sat on the floor of empty apartments and ate shitty Chinese food, playing drinking games to Hallmark Christmas movies and exchanging homemade gifts because they were fresh out of school and too poor to buy anything. “Some were okay,” Eddie finished, sniffing awkwardly.

Richie nodded understandably, and didn’t push any further. “At least now you’ve got Judy Garland and me to put up with on Christmas.”

Eddie could feel his cheeks turning pink. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

They were quiet until they reached the building, then stood outside the building, looking up at it with their hands still clasped. Richie glanced at his phone, then looked over at Eddie. The snow stopped falling not too long ago, but Richie still runs his hand nervously through his hair, shaking away the snow that isn’t there.

Richie speaks first. “I’ll see you later, right?”

Eddie turns to face him, unable to hide the smile anymore. “We’re best friends, of course you will.”

Richie sets a hand on Eddie’s shoulder, shaking him lightly. “You get out of the quiz this time, Kaspbrak.” They share a long look, one of many throughout the night. Eddie nudges his way closer until they’re pressed flush against each other, only their bulky coats between them. They meet halfway, Eddie pushing up on his toes and Richie leaning down, their lips pressing together. It’s chaste, but warm and soft and perfect.

They pull away, with quiet promises to talk later. Richie kisses him once more, a bit more desperate this time, then stalks off in the other direction, yelling something about Eddie receiving a passing grade. Eddie really can’t keep the smile off his face this time, and wonders why they hadn’t been doing that all these months.

Once inside the building, in the lobby decked out in holiday decorations, Eddie thinks that maybe Christmas isn’t as bad as he thought.

#shut up mary #reddie #eddie kaspbrak #richie tozier #it chapter 2 #it chapter two #it 2017 #it chapter 1 #it chapter one #i need to pick a tag for these movies and stick with it christ #my fic