#especially since you have to know an entirely separate form of the language AND a little Coptic before you try to get LEg

[thatlittleegyptologist]

i would read the grammar essay tbh

yeahhhhh but no one else would and the set up it'd take to make it understandable to someone not versed in Late Egyptian would be unreal

#especially since you have to know an entirely separate form of the language AND a little Coptic before you try to get LEg

[drvirgus]

Visit from Australia

Idol! Hanni X non Idol! Reader

Description: Y/n and Hanni are childhood best friends who have always had a crush on each other. Y/n visited Hanni in Korea during the holidays and got to know the other NewJeans members.

One Shot

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Tired, I yawned once. My hand on my suitcase as I retrieved it from the baggage carousel and sighed contentedly. In my left hand, I held the bag with the bread tightly, and with my right hand, I now tried to find the exit. I bit my lip as I concentrated hard on reading the Korean characters.

I would be moving here within the next year. What I just experienced was, of course, only a vacation for me, but it was also a kind of preparation. After all, I would now spend exactly 2 months here and, of course, immediately get a passport and everything else that was necessary.

Smiling, as I would soon see my best friend again. Pham Hanni, one of the NewJeans members. I know it's really hard to believe, but it was true. We had met at the age of 2 at the playground. Back then, I had destroyed Hanni's sandcastle, making her cry. This seemed to genuinely bother me back then, which is why I built a new one with her.

Although exactly 2 years separated us, it never really bothered us. We were always together. Except when she left to travel to Korea. The farewell at the airport was tough. I had never cried so much in my life. But that was understandable, right? The person with whom I spent every single second daily was leaving me.

Fortunately, we kept in touch. We had FaceTime calls from time to time and also chatted about some memes on Instagram. Of course, Hanni also visited her family during the holidays, so we met several times there. Unfortunately, saying goodbye was always and always difficult.

Maybe that convinced me to move to Korea?

I had applied to one of the universities just for fun and with the expectation of being rejected, but I got accepted. I was really accepted...

"Y/n"

With a furrowed brow, I looked around, but I only recognized one person wildly waving at me. The person wore a cap and a mask that completely covered their face. Beside them stood a slightly taller man in a suit. A smile formed on my face as I recognized the bracelet on her wrist.

Hanni.

Grinning broadly, almost running, I now approached the younger one. My arms immediately wrapped around the hips of the equally-sized person, lifting her up. Her laughter was unmistakable. "I missed you so much," I said in English as I gently placed the younger one back on the ground. The man next to us scrutinized me thoroughly, seemingly with some kind of earpiece in his ear.

Hanni grabbed my hand as I noticed the mask on her face lifted slightly, apparently smiling, as her eyes also turned into slits. I couldn't suppress my own smile. I grabbed my suitcase, which the man in the suit promptly took from me. I tried to protest, but the man shook his head stubbornly.

"Forget it. He won't give in," Hanni said, lightly laughing as she practically clung to my arm. Together, we headed to the car and sat in the back immediately. As the door closed, Hanni took off her cap and mask, placing them on her lap.

"So? How was the flight?" the younger one asked, turning more towards me. Smirking, I leaned towards her, widening Hanni's eyes. My hand grabbed her seatbelt, pulling it towards me to buckle her up. "Pretty good. There was an older woman next to me, and we played cards and talked almost the entire flight. She told me a lot about Korea," I replied as I now fastened my own seatbelt.

"And how's your Korean?" Hanni asked, slightly laughing as she switched to the language. Her eyes sparkled challengingly. "Your mother told me you're studying day and night for it," Hanni said in Korean, and I nodded. Nervously, I began to fidget with my fingers.

"Yeah. My Korean has definitely improved, especially since I focused on understanding and speaking first. But I can hardly read and can't write at all," I confessed, feeling a bit embarrassed, which made Hanni joyfully clap her hands. Overjoyed, the younger one stared at me, saying, "I'll help you. Don't worry," as her hand landed on mine.

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Smirking, I looked around with my phone in hand as I stared at the message from my best friend. Apparently, a really tall woman with a baby face would be waiting for me at the entrance. The description was quite questionable, but I still scanned the area. My eyebrows raised as I noticed someone fitting that description.

So, I headed towards the person who absentmindedly kicked her foot against a rather old and stuck piece of gum on the pavement, seemingly trying to loosen it. "Hyein?" I asked as I approached the taller figure. Almost immediately, her eyes shot to me. Without saying a word, she pulled out her phone and seemed to be comparing something.

"Uh. I'm Y/n," I said, smiling slightly and probably a bit nervously. Hyein's eyes immediately lit up, and she quickly stashed her phone in her pocket. Almost instantly, she bowed deeply, and I did the same in return. "Unnie," the younger one said, gesturing with her hand, which honestly looked like sign language, for me to follow her.

I followed her lead, and she guided me through the HYBE building. With wide eyes, I admired my surroundings. Upon reaching a room, the music stopped, and I noticed four pairs of eyes turning towards us. A smile formed on my face as Hanni, like a little bunny, jumped towards me.

Her arms immediately wrapped around my neck, making me chuckle. I hugged her back, but I soon pulled away to bow slightly in front of the others. "Hello. I'm Y/n," I introduced myself in Korean, which prompted Hyein to open her mouth.

"You can speak Korean?" she asked, probably because I had just introduced myself in English moments ago. "I spent the entire journey thinking about what exactly I can say in English," Hyein said, now laughing lightly, her body relaxing. This made me laugh too.

My hand on Hanni's hip while her arm was still wrapped around my neck. Danielle squealed, "Hanni has told us so much about you. Nice to finally meet you," the slightly taller one exclaimed joyfully as she jumped on the spot. Surprised by the younger one, I chuckled.

"Let me introduce everyone. This is Hyein and Haerin," the black-haired one said with a smile, pointing with her hand to each respective person. Hyein immediately flashed me a peace sign, while Haerin simply nodded at me. "This is Danielle, and I'm Minji," she finally concluded the introduction.

"Well, I don't want to seem intrusive, but I already knew that," I said, laughing lightly. "Y/n is a bunny," Hanni announced with a broad grin. Haerin smirked as her eyebrow raised, "Who's your bias?" she asked, making Hanni snort. Confidently running her hand through her hair, Hanni said, "Of course, it's me. Who else?" This made me laugh a bit.

Haerin smiled, "Is that so?" she asked as her eyes landed on me. I immediately let go of the younger one's hip, causing her to look at me with wide eyes. "Well, I don't want to flirt here," I said, laughing lightly, sparking even more curiosity from the others. "But Minji," I started, but the words got stuck in my throat. "Wow," I simply said.

Minji laughed flattered as she provocatively looked at Hanni. She immediately stuck her tongue out, "Then I'll just be her number 2!" Hanni declared, but I just hissed as I looked to the side. My best friend looked at me incredulously, "Haerin," I said defeated, which made Haerin burst into laughter.

"But enough of that. How about we go grab something to eat?" Danielle suggested, trying to lighten the mood. I smiled and agreed immediately. However, Hanni seemed to be in no mood anymore. She even put some distance between us...

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Laughing, I turned my head towards Hanni as Minji said something quite funny. The others just rolled their eyes, but I honestly found it amusing. I loved Dad jokes, and Minji told quite a few. Unfortunately, my smile faded as I saw my best friend simply poking at her food.

"Hanni?" I asked, concerned. The younger one sighed and looked at me, her eyes narrowed and her face angrily contorted. "What?" she asked, annoyed. I blinked, confused, my mouth slightly open as I analyzed the expression on the younger one's face.

Lips pressed together.

Forehead wrinkled.

Eyes narrowed.

Jaw tense.

"Why are you angry?" I asked quietly, so the others wouldn't notice. Hanni snorted, "Oh, now you're giving me attention?" she asked, confusing me even more. Now, my forehead furrowed too, "Uh," I started, but Hanni just sighed as she rolled her eyes. She snorted, "Forget it, Y/n."

The rest of the meal was the same. Hanni didn't engage in any conversation and just continued poking at her food. The others talked to me, and, of course, I responded. But I was nervous. My head was racing like crazy.

What did I do wrong?

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Uncertainly, my hands fidgeted together. Somehow, they had all managed to invite me to their homes. How could I say no when Hyein looked at me with those puppy eyes, Minji insisted, and even Haerin requested it. Danielle just looked at me hopefully.

The only problem, however, was Hanni. She started ignoring me, even though I primarily came to Korea because of her. Was that possibly a mistake?

"Here," I heard Minji say as she handed me a glass of water. Smiling, I immediately took it and sipped from my glass. Hanni sat next to me, but she leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest. This only made me even more nervous. "Hanni," Minji said now. The taller one took a deep breath as she looked at my best friend.

"Why don't you show Y/n your room?" Minji suggested, her eyebrows raising expectantly. Almost immediately, Haerin nodded her head. "And also, sort out whatever's going on between you two," the cat-like woman said, pointing with her index finger between Hanni and me.

Expectantly, I looked at my best friend, who stared at me stoically. A sigh escaped her lips as she got up from the couch. She briefly looked at me from over her shoulder and then walked away. My eyebrows raised, and with a sudden movement, I stood up from the couch and followed my best friend. My hands still intertwined.

Hanni opened one of the doors. "Here. My room," she monotoned as she watched me enter her room. My eyes widened in amazement, and my mouth opened as I saw the view. The Han River right in front of her balcony. But something bothered me.

"What's your problem, Hanni?" I asked now as my eyes lingered on her. Hanni looked at me for a long while. "Nothing," she answered annoyed as she rolled her eyes. Almost immediately, my jaw tensed. I was really fed up. "I'm here because of you! But... you're treating me as if I'm not even here," I started, waving my hands through the air while talking. "If that's the case, I might as well go back to Australia," I finished my sentence.

Hanni snorted, her hands on her hips. The younger one closed her door; she knew our voices would rise. That was always the case when we argued. "Because of me?! You don't even believe that yourself," the younger one said mockingly, her forehead furrowing. "If you were here because of me, you wouldn't have flirted with Minji like that!" she responded, visibly annoyed and angry.

Astonished, I sighed this time. "Are you serious? Flirted? I wasn't flirting!" I retorted, but Hanni rolled her eyes in disbelief. Her small hands clenched into fists. "I saw it, you know," she replied, mimicking my gestures. Of course, she exaggerated.

"You can't even talk! You're in a relationship, so why do you care if I flirt?" I screamed now, my face completely red. But now Hanni paused. She looked at me questioningly, and her tense shoulders relaxed. "What do you mean? I'm not in a relationship," the younger one replied calmer, approaching me a bit.

The words got stuck in my throat as I noticed how calm Hanni had become. Almost immediately, I bit my lip as I looked away. I needed to calm down before I said something I would regret.

"Y/n? Did you flirt with Minji?" she asked now, making me look at her. My eyes widened, "Were you... distant because of that?" I asked now, a goosebump slowly forming on my arms. But Hanni expected an answer, "I... No. I didn't flirt. At least not consciously," I answered now, and my best friend nodded.

"Were you jealous when you heard that I might be in a relationship?" she asked again, and almost immediately, a deep red blush appeared on my cheeks. I hesitated as I looked at our hands, "I- well... uh," I started, visibly nervous. The anger was gone, which made Hanni smile a bit, "I was jealous," she confessed, and my eyes widened.

"The thought that you might prefer one of my members over me... that you would enter a relationship with Minji," the younger one said, and my eyes widened.

She didn't mean it romantically...

Somewhat sad about what I heard, I started to laugh. I looked away once again. I had always been in love with my best friend... I didn't know exactly when it started. Maybe I had always loved her? But at some point, I began to think about her... differently than a best friend should.

"The thought that you would love someone else more than me," Hanni said now, making my eyes shoot back to her. Hanni chuckled thanks to my expression, "I love you, Y/n," the younger one said, leaving my mouth open. I hesitated as I had to register the words in my head.

"I, uh. I love you. Well, you, Hanni. I- wait. what?"

Hanni laughed because of my stuttering. Her hand on my neck as she connected our lips. My eyes widened, but I relaxed after a short while. Feeling her lips on mine, not as a daydream, was a blessing!

My hands wandered to her hips as I slowly let myself fall into the kiss. Hanni smiled as she gently pulled away from me, "Why didn't you ever... why didn't you ever tell me what you feel for me?" the same-height person asked as she looked at me with curious eyes. I swallowed down the nervousness, "Because... we're friends... I didn't want-" I started, but Hanni nodded with her head.

"I understand. This could have gone 50% wrong just now. Luckily, I know you so well," Hanni said, slightly laughing as her fingers slowly wandered from my neck into my hair. The sweet smile glued to her face. I snorted amused, "Thank goodness," I whispered in agreement.

"So. Are you finally going to kiss me, Y/n?" the younger one asked now, probably chuckling because of my bright red face. Nervously, I laughed, "Yes," I whispered only in response as I pressed my lips against hers.

"What's going on?"

"Let me see too?"

"And?"

"They're kissing."

"Did Hanni finally confess?"

"Finally. I couldn't stand the gushing about Y/n anymore."

"Keep it down, or they might hear us."

"Who's the top, and who's the bottom?"

"Hyein!"

#newjeans minji #newjeans hanni #hanni pham #newjeans #danielle #newjeans hyein #haerin #hanni x reader #newjeans x reader

[snapscube]

Remember when people were calling you the "long lost McElroy sister"? Do you see the similarity at all, or do you think it's just because you share a similar creative niche (gaming/streaming/comedy) with the McElroy brothers?

Lol, "when" people were doing it.

I still get it to this day, friend, despite my constant protests.

I used to understand, and it was even expected initially if not personally encouraged! There was definitely a period of time where they were my biggest comedic/creative inspirations, and the truth of the matter is that I am a mannerisms sponge. I mimic people around me, and people that inspire me, and whether or not it's more than the average person I have no clue, but I will go through seasons of daily watching a particular personality or creator I'm fond of and/or inspired by and usually come out the other end having picked up certain tendencies VERY quickly, a large portion of those being speech patterns.

There's definitely a segment of my content around 2017/2018 or so where, yeah, you can very much tell I adopted a McElroy-esque speaking pattern directly (like what felt like 70% of other Tumblr users also did lol) and it was both because of how much of their content I was into at the time AND also because at the time I found their output inspiring as someone who was used to more... Loud Gamer forms of comedy, to put it bluntly. So at first I took the comparisons in stride and saw it as a signal of my own growth as an entertainer, and my ability to be funny in a way that wasn't just Loud = Funny.

But the thing you have to know about me, and my time as even a minor public figure, is that this comparison was not the first of its that was constantly levied at me, and it unfortunately was not the last one in the slightest. Some will remember the days in which I was a reasonably renowned "Bill Cipher" impersonator in the Gravity Falls fandom, and the pattern was very similar at the time. I dealt with people CONSTANTLY telling me that, despite all of my attempts to separate myself from the voice work I did as the character, I always sounded Just Like Bill even when I was just using my casual speaking voice. If this sounds familiar to those of you who have only been around since the dubs popped off, it's likely because I also go through the same thing ever since I became known for Sonic impressions.

And then outside of voice work I've had my style of content continue to be compared to the McElroy's body of work and even beyond to the likes of Jerma and other big-name-of-the-era content creators. And I have to once again stress: I am completely self-aware that it is not entirely unfounded. I mean, the most recent one I got was just the other day when on stream someone told me I had a speech pattern similar to Northernlion. And like, I even admitted right then and there.... yeah! That makes sense! I've had NL compilations going into my ears and brain for hours upon hours on end lately. So I don't mean to only complain and say "this makes no sense" with delusions that it's completely baseless. BUT, I guess if I do have to circle around to a point, it would be that, though I can occasionally understand comparisons, I would hope y'all in turn can understand why it might not be an easy thing for someone like me to hear, especially in the way it never really seems to go away? Even if one like Bill Cipher fades out, the whole "SnapCube is just a female version of [insert larger male peer in the content space]" thing is something that cycles along regardless. And I get it, it's human nature to compare and contrast. I do it too! But as someone who is always trying to stand out in what I do and make my own value as an individual known above the cacophony of content saturation, I do implore people to think twice about the language they use when making otherwise favorable comparisons. Recommending my content by saying something like "if you like Jerma/McElroys/NL/etc., then SnapCube gives off similar vibes" makes of a WORLD of a difference compared to "This stream is just something Jerma would do" or "Penny is just a female Griffin McElroy" (both things I have heard almost verbatim, constantly). They approach the same ideas, but one gives me so much more of a chance to like... start off a first impression as My Own Person and not just a derivative Girl Alternative, if that makes sense.

Whoops I talked about this way too much :) Can you tell I think about this a lot LMAO

Anyway here's the obligatory joke response that's been spread before

[satoruhour]

hi t!!! i hope you're well. saw that your requests are open and i'm actually nervous bec this is my first time ever sending a request (⁠๑⁠•⁠﹏⁠•⁠)

may i request gojo being jealous or pouty over reader simping over a celebrity (nct maybe or mark lee especially) (i read that you used to write for nct hehehe) (i'm on nct rabbit hole for the past few days) or or or bassist!suguru teaching reader how to play the guitar maybe?

(am i doing this right? (⁠*⁠・⁠～⁠・⁠*⁠) )

anyway, have a good rest of your day/night!!!

a/n: omg my love im sorry this took so long! i hope you enjoy, i wrote both but ill post it separately :)

five hours. that’s how long your boyfriend’s been sulking and ignoring you and throwing mini tantrums every now and then. all because you liked to tune into youtube a little too much to look at a bunch of boys (“26, mind you! why do they need so many members anyway?” gojo would say) dance and sing at the same time.

“NCT U this, NCT Dream that, what about NCT Tokyo?” gojo paces the room the very first time you explain the whole concept to him — a group of unlimited members while some are sorted into specific sub-groups that represent specific concepts. gojo gets part of it, but doesn’t understand why they needed to be so attractive.

“they do have an NCT Tokyo, actually! newly formed!” you grin, knowing this information would only set him off, and since then, every comeback, every variety show, every photoshoot behind-the-scenes video that you blast on the living room television is enough to get your boyfriend in the most terrible mood.

but one thing that really sets the sorcerer off is your obsession with the canadian singer slash rapper, mark lee. you admired the work he put in — training since he was young and miles away from his family. he debuted at only sixteen and made a name for himself ever since then, always putting in his 200% for everything that he does. mark’s face shows up way more often than the group videos, gojo notices; a lot of the specific fancams that focus on his performance, or those fan-made compilation videos.

it’s not like you’ve been playing videos non-stop, either. you offered gojo to wave his white flag whenever you went to do chores, made lunch, did some reports, but none came.

so you might as well enjoy a few more videos until you break the ice. you reach hour four when you feel a little bad about the glares he’s giving the tv, seated on the far other end of the sofa while you enjoy the fancam videos of fact check.

curiously, out of the corner of your eye, there’s just a bit of change in your boyfriend’s expression, a scowl still deep on his face but his eyebrows are not as furrowed, eyes not as narrowed and squinted as he liked it to be. having dated since high school, you already know what’s going in that head of his — you know he finds mark at least a little attractive, but his pride wouldn’t let him tell you that.

“see anything you like?” you hear the audible gasp of gojo when you call out to him, letting the video go on not because you watched it a couple times already (while not entirely wrong) but you think gojo still outshines any k-pop idol on the big screen.

“no . .” he mumbles, sinking into himself more and more to prevent you from looking at his expression; but the foot-tapping, the secretive eyes, the head bobs all give him away. you know you’ve got him figured out when you scoot over and he doesn’t move, letting you untangle his fortress of shame shown in his body language.

“you can tell me he’s pretty, you know that right?” you giggle, lifting his arm to slot yourself under it. you fit just right upon his bent knees, looking up at the familiar frown on his face. gently, you peel away the blindfold on his face, greeted with the stark blue eyes that you find yourself falling deeper into each day.

“no comment.”

you laugh at his stubbornness, a hand caressing his cheek as you try to contain your smile. even now, he’s not doing a very good job of catching glances at the television and sulking.

“okay, then, i guess i’ll just continue to watch my videos, then, since tomorrow is an off-day.”

“no! i-i mean . . uh,” gojo is torn between admiring your favourite idol and staying jealous, but he can’t formulate words when you stare at him like that; a crinkle in your eyes and just a sliver of your teeth while your eyes sparkle under the apartment lighting.

“ugghhhh . . i don’t know,” gojo buries his face in his hands, “why do you like him so much anyway? do you like him more than me?”

you hum, striking a faux pose of pondering and your boyfriend only whines again at that, accidentally putting down his knees and your support from behind you is made void immediately. if it wasn’t for your arms that hung around his shoulder, you would’ve landed on his lap pretty harshly.

gojo only huffs after also doing his part: an arm replacing his thighs to keep you from falling. there you hang awkwardly, still faced with gojo’s adorable pout, “mark lee definitely couldn’t have done that. i’ll tell you that much.”

you roll your eyes with a big grin, “oh, you big jealous oaf, c’mere.”

without warning you latch yourself onto him, slightly tackling him into a violent embrace with your lips on his and gojo sighs indefinitely like he’s been waiting all day for it. he just lets you have your way with him, letting you kiss him like you’ve never done before. he hums into your mouth, submitting to you as you climb into his lap.

“so i’m assuming you like me more than him?”

your boyfriend teases as you pull away, hands caressing your sides and sending chills right down to your centre.

“do you really have to ask?” you giggle, fully taking off his blindfold, now, brushing your fingers through his hair. through the corner of your eye, you see him play with the left and right buttons possibly to find a spicy playlist you two could get down to (his words, not yours), but before it can even start:

the playlist’s interrupted by an advert for nature republic with mark’s voice that plays through the speakers, panning out to eight other boys on a beach and smiling as if they’re aware of the torment they harboured.

your sorcerer boyfriend merely throws his hands up in frustration (“oh, come on!”), melting into the couch with a permanent scowl while the living room only fills up with your loud laughter.

#euuughhhh idk how to feel abt this but i should be kinder to myself considering i havent written for a whole month #and is currently burning up #it's only up from here ig #gojo x reader #gojo fluff #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru #gojou satoru x reader #gojou x reader #gojo x you #satoru gojo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jjk fluff #jjk x reader #jjk drabbles #jjk scenarios

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Would you be willing to do relationship hcs with any of the following from Blue Exorcist? :0

Juzo Shima, Satan, Shiro Fujimoto, Yuri Egin, Mephisto?

Hi Anon! Thank you for your request! I hope you like the headcanons.

Fandom: Blue Exorcist

Characters: Juzo Shima, Satan, Shiro Fujimoto, Yuri Egin, Mephisto Pheles x gn! Reader (separate)

Juzo is an interesting balance between a super caring partner who would never hurt a fly and someone who would fight entire wars if you asked him to.

In the same vein, he’s more than willing to do anything you ask of him, even if it’s something as simple as getting rid of a bug.

A really good listener. Anything you want to talk about, he’s setting aside whatever he reasonably can to put all of his focus on you.

I feel like he can be a bit overprotective at times, even to the point of smothering you but if you ask him to back off and let you do your thing, he’ll respect your wishes.

Juzo just doesn’t want anything to happen to you. He’s already lost a lot of his friends and family to demons, he couldn’t bear the thought of losing you too.

Satan’s a challenging one to write relationship headcanons for, mostly because the only “relationship” we ever saw him in was his obsession with Yuri. So I’ll try to write these as accurately as possible without making them completely toxic.

Very willing to learn from you and listen. He’s a curious being after all and, while the number of people he trusts or cares about is very small, he does value their opinions.

Definitely the kind of person (can I call him a person if he’s a demon?) to cherish quality time. He can be a bit clingy sometimes, but he just wants to spend time with the person he cares about most.

He’s also very into gift giving but be warned, his gifts may be a bit erratic at first. He’s sort of like a stray cat that’s taken a liking to you. You might end up with dead bugs and sticks beside your bed.

All of that being said, a relationship with Satan is almost certain to be toxic in some way shape or form. He’s never had a “normal” relationship and doesn’t know where to start since he doesn’t see anything wrong with his way of thinking.

Shiro is a lot like Juzo in that he’s got two sides to him in a relationship. And I don’t mean this in a bad way!

On one hand, he’s the most caring and protective partner you could hope for. He’s always paying attention to what you’re talking about and will do his best to support you in everything you do.

On the other hand, he will tease you mercilessly and play minor pranks at every possible moment. It’s one of his love languages.

Having said that, he respects you deeply and will always back off with his teasing if you’ve had a bad day or ask him to stop.

He’s also amazing at helping you relax after a long day. He’s drawing you a relaxing bath, adding some decorations (if the Vatican didn’t want him using those exorcism candles and salt for baths, why did they work so well for just that?) and cooking your favourite meal. It’s really the least he can do.

Yuri is a very caring partner. She was able to show kindness to Satan, even after everything he did so she’s certainly capable of caring deeply about someone so close to her.

She loves spending quality time with you. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing, as long as you’re able to sit together.

As part of this, she loves twining one leg around yours while you’re sitting together if that’s something you’re comfortable with.

She didn’t have the best childhood, so she does sometimes have doubts about your relationship. Just give her some words of reassurance (or acts of affection if words aren’t your thing) and she’ll be feeling better in no time.

Yuri would love it if you’re interested in exorcism. She’s got a lot she wants so talk about, especially regarding demons not being as bad as everyone makes them out to be, so please let her ramble about her thoughts.

Mephisto is an interesting case. If you’re in a relationship, that means you’ve caught his attention. And that means he’s going to protect you with all of his demonic powers.

However, sometimes he can seem as though he’s only with you because he sees you as a curiosity.

If this ever gets too much or you’re doubting the sincerity of your relationship, just tell him and he’ll set aside his piles of paperwork to talk to you about his behaviour.

He loves entertaining you with his magic, as well as going on fun dates. Mephy Land is always a hit and, since he owns the place, you’ll never have to pay for any of the food or rides.

He’s surprisingly attentive when you’re talking about your day. He wants to learn more about humans and their behaviours and what better way than to study the person he cares about most.

#writing #fanfic #headcanons #headcanon request #request #blue exorcist #blue exorcist x reader #juzo shima #juzo shima x reader #satan #satan x reader #shiro fujimoto #shiro fujimoto x reader #mephisto pheles #mephisto pheles x reader

[glitter-soda]

I’d like to break down my current feelings and gripes about the trans movement, both to inform my followers and maybe start a discussion.

The vast majority of trans people are relatively normal and are just trying to live their lives in peace.

Trans women are trans women. They are male, and by definition it is much more accurate to call them men than women, but I do believe they are something of a separate category. The same goes for trans men, in reverse.

Definitions like “a woman is anyone who identifies as a woman” and “a lesbian is a non-man who’s attracted to non-men” are ridiculous and frankly offensive. The word lesbian is taken. It means “female homosexual”. Literally nobody is stopping you from making your own term, so stop trying to forcibly redefine ours.

Male socialization and female socialization both exist and are important. Trans women were socialized male and trans men were socialized female.

The sheer amount of vitriol towards “terfs” and anyone else who questions anything is just…disgusting. It’s acceptable to send them graphic rape and death threats, doxx them, assault them at protests, and celebrate when they get sick or die. I don’t know how to explain that that’s not normal fucking behavior, especially since “terf” is thrown around very casually these days.

Biological women should be allowed to have spaces that don’t include any males, regardless of the purpose. Lesbian bars, female only gyms, female only domestic violence/rape shelters, and literally anything else are fine and should be allowed to exist without being vandalized or threatened with shutdowns.

The former point includes female only sports teams. Males are biologically very different from females and it should’ve be offensive to anyone to say so. Both sexes have advantages and disadvantages over the other, it just happens that many sports are designed in a way that makes it easier for males to succeed.

Abolishing female only categories in award ceremonies, scholarships, and the like in the name of inclusivity is stupid and completely forgets the reason they were established in the first place. Male bias exists and women will almost never be included because of it.

I’m not against transitioning because I believe in total bodily autonomy and find language like “mutilation” to be incredibly gross and callous. However, I think it’s bad and dangerous to be presented as the literal only treatment for dysphoria.

Children who express any form of questioning or gender nonconformity should not be immediately assumed to be trans. A little girl saying “I want to be a boy” may mean “I want the freedoms that boys have and this is the only way I know how to express it because I’m six”. For actual trans kids, puberty blockers are dangerous and minors should only be allowed to socially transition.

The entire idea of being non-binary is frankly silly to me. I believe it to mostly be a poor coping mechanism for sexist stereotypes. Again, do what you want, but don’t expect me to take you seriously.

The way a lot of information and discussions that don’t support the current trans narrative are censored or lied about online is really bad and honestly borderline cult-like. Very few people actually know what radfems believe because people are discouraged from reading anything straight from the source. The Cass Review was picked apart in bad faith and many of the articles that “sum it up” are just straight up full of false information. Detransitioners are swept under the rug and told to shut up and stop trying to ruin things when they try to talk about their experiences. The trans community needs to do better.

And most importantly:

I do not want trans people dead. I believe in my heart of hearts that the vast majority of actual radfems and gender criticals do not want trans people dead. Neither ideology is hateful or inherently against trans people.

(Y’all just hate being told “no”.)

(Also I probably forgot something, so feel free to ask or discuss idk)

#radfem safe #terf safe #personal #trans #misogyny #gender critical #i s2g if this flops after all the time i spent on it i’m killing someone

[nefariousfool]

I have no direct goat in this game but I will yap anyways

I don't think tme/tma is, like, precise language in almost any form especially in the casual usage I've seen it used and was curious why this push was being made for its usage. transfem/transmasc have been far more useful and far less reductive for a very very long time. I know this may come off "all people are affected by oppression" but saying your definition of Trans Misogyny Affected doesn't apply to a cis gay man who has been regularly treated with the same tools of oppression for not acting in line with society's conception of gender, then suddenly deciding he is "affected" by transmisogyny the second he identifies as non binary seems entirely useless. The obvious retort would be that, of course, all the punishments he faced for behaving femininely are retroactively now also transmisogyny, but this implies if he never came to this conclusion on his gender that violence he faced would not be the same hammer of transmisogyny but just uhhhh misdirected transmisogyny or transphobia. Your life cannot be affected by misdirected oppression after all! This feels like a functionally useless set of terms when more useful ones exist, and reducing criticism of this to exclusively being from afabs is not only entirely untrue but a bad if nonexistent defense of their use. also if I'm going to nitpick the term doesn't really function to differentiate itself from afab and amab if you're only going to use it when talking about situations that all but explicitly exclude cis men if not cis people all together, which seems to be the case but whatever that's about use and largely separate from the issues I have at the heart of this

The reasoning for the change I've seen that has been the most consistent and makes the most sense is "annoying transmisandry-truther afab dweebs call themselves transfem on tumblr (obviously because theyre gender edgelords the weirdest gender they can conceive of is a trans woman) thus making the term lose all meaning" and that feels like. OK. first, what's going to stop them from claiming to be tma. They will do that. They are already, probably. second, this is like claiming bc a bunch of annoying 4chan plants start identifying as cis male lesbians it makes the term lesbian useless so we gotta pivot to wafiia (woman and feminine identified individual attracted) and yeah that's more loose and ignores a lot of obvious issues but it's more direct about the axis of oppression wafiia face (their love of women (and feminine identifying individuals but not feminine cis men and also-))

If you disagree greatly feel free to do so, after all I might be fully misinformed, but idk I've read a lot of discussion and am yet to be fully convinced and since I just feel kinda "eh" about the term and don't personally write posts about the tma/transfem experience (obviously) your efforts may be better done elsewhere. Who knows maybe in a few it'll become the only term people use and all dissent will be moot anyways.

[rosesinbloom7love]

During a mission, L'arc's party gets caught in a terrible storm and ends up separated. L'arc & Therese take shelter in an abandoned temple to hopefully wait out the storm. Unbeknownst to the two adventures, the temple isn't as abandoned as they first thought.

L'arc: *Finishing boarding the doors & windows* Ok, this should hold until the storm lets up.

Therese: I hope Glass and Kizuna are alright.

L'arc: I'm sure they're fine. Those two can handle themselves on their own with ease. Plus, they're together, so there's no need to worry!

Therese: I suppose you have a point...Jeez, it's so dark in here. I can hardly see a thing! Let's just...

*Therese uses magic to create a small blue, flame in the palm of her hand that partially illuminates the room.

Therese: That's better!

L'arc: Whoa, look at this...

*L'arc points to something and when Therese turns to look, her eyes widen in surprise. Standing before the two was an enormous statue of a giant man. The statue looked to be made of marble and depicted the man standing wearing a long robe that reached down to his ankles with one long sleeve over the right arm. Atop his head lay a long veil that draped over his entire body. The upper part of the face was covered by the veil and what was likely the hair. The man's right hand held a large circular shield, while the left held a large basket filled with what looked to be fruits, berries and nuts*

Therese: This must have been a temple of worship from long ago. But, i've never heard of any temples being built in this area, especially this far removed from any towns or cities.

L'arc: By the looks of it, this temple has been abandoned for quite some time, centuries if I had to guess.

Therese: I think there's something written here...

*Therese approaches the enormous statue, before crouching down at the base of the sculpture. There, carved into the base podium, was some kind of inscription.*

L'arc: What does it say?

Therese: I don't know. The writing is very old and weathered. That, and it's written in an ancient language that i've never seen before.

*Just then, the inscription started to glow. L'arc & Therese stared in awe as the words carved into the base bend and shift into a clear language the two adventures could read*

L'arc: Whoa!

Therese: "The divine shield that protects this land. May he bring forth prosperity to all those that worship him." The Divine Shield? I've never heard of any kind of god or deity with such a title.

L'arc: Must be the name of the god that was worshiped, before this place was abandoned...

*Suddenly, the blue flame in Therese's hand goes out as if someone had snuffed it and the two adventures are plunged into darkness*

L'arc: Shit! What happened?!

Therese: I don't know! My flame just suddenly went out!

*Just then as the two were surrounded by darkness, the ominous sound of a man's laughter suddenly began to echo all around them*

???: Hahahaha...Ahahahahaha...

L'arc: Who's there!? Show yourself!

???: ...It's been...soo long, since i've last had visitors~ It's been so lonesome here~ All by myself...Not a human or beast to keep me company...Hhahahaha...

Therese: Whoever you are, come out and face us or we'll be forced to confront you!

???: Now now~ No need to sound so threatening~ I am no threat to you. I was merely joking~ Now then...

*The faint sound of someone snapping their fingers was heard and then, the room was suddenly illuminated by several candles. L'arc & Therese then noticed a strange green mist started to gather by their feet. The two adventures quickly take a few steps back as the mist slowly begins to form into a humanoid-like shape. The mist then suddenly vanishes to reveal a man now standing in place of where the green mist once was.*

*Both L'arc & Therese couldn't help, but stared in awe at the being before them. He was quite possibly the most handsome man either had ever seen. The man was tall with fair skin and messy, yet, soft-looking raven hair. He wore a thin, almost translucent white toga robe that was loosely draped over his shoulders. The robe looked to be made of fine silk and stopped just above the man's ankles. The man arms were completely exposed with gold jewel-encrusted bracelets adorning his wrists and upper forearm. On his feet, the man wore gold sandals that laced up to his calves and on his head laid a diadem of gold leaves. However, undoubtedly, the most striking feature of the man was his deep green eyes that seemed to glow in the dim light.*

???: *Chuckles* Hasn't anyone ever told you it's rude to stare~?

L'arc: *Blushing slightly* Uh! S-Sorry, but...Who or WHAT are you?

???: I am the god that once resided over this land. A deity of forests, wealth, prosperity and fertility. The protector of both man and beast...But, you may simply call me, Naofumi.

Therese: Pardon my rudeness, Lord Naofumi. But, if you truly are a god as you claim, why is it that no one has heard of you? And, why is there no record of your existence in any archive?

L'arc: Therese!

Deity!Naofumi: *Chuckles* It is alright. I see no offense to her questions...Centuries ago, this land was once home to an ancient and powerful kingdom. The people of this kingdom worshiped me and in return, i'd grant them all sorts of blessings to improve both their land and their lives.

Deity!Naofumi: For a long time, my people lived in peace and harmony...But then, one day, we were attacked by knights from the neighboring kingdom. It was so sudden we had no time to defend ourselves. The knights pillaged and ravaged our land, slaughtering everyone in their path. Not a single soul was spared...

Deity!Naofumi: I could not stand by and watch my people be slaughtered, so I descended to earth to help...that was a mistake...

*L'arc & Therese look at Naofumi confused, but the deity continued*

Deity!Naofumi: As soon as I descended, I was confronted by a mage. Their face was covered by a black cloak and they practically oozed powerful magic. My memory is a bit fuzzy, but...I remember the mage casting some sort of spell and then I blacked out...When I finally came to everything was in ruin. Blood covered the buildings and bodies littered the ground...

Deity!Naofumi: So, to answer your question, the reason no one has ever heard of me is quite simple...All those that knew of my existence were massacred long ago...

*Both L'arc & Therese were shocked and horrified after hearing the deity's story.*

L'arc: That's horrible...

Deity!Naofumi: It was, truly...

Therese: How is it that no one knows such a horrific event took place!? An entire kingdom being massacred should definitely draw a lot of attention.

Deity!Naofumi: I'd guess, someone likely used magic to completely erase any and all traces of my kingdom ever existing. Along with any knowledge about my existence. Though, in order to accomplish such a feat, they'd need to be on the level of a god. But that's just my thought.

L'arc: What would be their motive behind it?

Deity!Naofumi: Likely, they just wanted to get rid of me or simply weaken my power. All deities drive their power from worship and well we can't die, we can be weakened. So, the best way to weaken a god is to lower their worship.

Therese: Would a god really go so far as to kill off an entire population just to weaken another god!?

Deity!Naofumi: You'd be surprised! Contrary to how many of you mortal portray the gods, most of us are nowhere near as divine and can be VERY petty and selfish to both mortals and each other. It really doesn't take much to anger a god, unfortunately...

Therese: ...What could you have possibly done for another god to do such a thing like killing an entire kingdom for?

Deity!Naofumi: F*ck if I know. it could be something as major as being seen as a threat to their position to something as ridiculous as rejecting their advances. I've pissed off quite a few gods in my days, so I really couldn't say...

L'arc: You don't look like someone who'd do anything truly bad.

Deity!Naofumi: *Chuckles* Careful~ Looks can be quite deceiving~

L'arc: *Blushing* Uh, in any case, If you don't mind me asking...Why are you still here?

Deity!Naofumi: Care to elaborate?

L'arc: I mean...Why are you still well here? In this temple? It's obviously been abandoned for years. Why don't you move somewhere else to maybe get more followers?

*Naofumi is silent for a moment, before his face shifts to one of sadness*

Deity!Naofumi: ...Because I am stuck here...

L'arc & Therese: What?

Deity!Naofumi: It is as I said. I cannot leave this place. During the destruction of my kingdom I was sealed away in this very temple, unable to ever leave. Trust me, if I could leave, I would. I long to be able to run freely once more...

L'arc: ...What if we set you free?

Deity!Naofumi: What?

Therese: What!?

L'arc: You heard me.

Therese: L'arc, are you sure? We don't even know if he's telling the truth! No offense.

Deity!Naofumi: It's quite alright. You have every right to be skeptical. For all you know, I could have made the entire story up, so i'd gain your trust.

Therese: You're really making yourself look worse, you know that?

Deity!Naofumi: *Laughs slightly* Tell you what, how about we make a deal?

Therese: *Stares suspiciously* What kind of deal?

Deity!Naofumi: If you two free me from my prison, i'll do anything you ask of me.

L'arc: ...Anything?

Deity!Naofumi: Of course! Not only that, but i'll even be willing to help you on your journey. Wouldn't having a god such as myself in your party be beneficial?

L'arc: You're not wrong...

Therese: How do we know you'll keep your word once we free you?

Deity!Naofumi: Hahaha, dear girl~ When a god gives their word, they're bound for all eternity~ So you needn't worry.

Therese: ...Ok, fine. We'll help you.

Deity!Naofumi: Excellent! You won't regret it~!

Therese: I hope not...

*Just then, the sounds of the raging storm outside started to suddenly die down*

Deity!Naofumi: Hmm, seems the weather outside has finally cleared up. I guess our time together is up. A shame really. I was hoping we could talk a little longer, but what can you do? You should probably go look for your companions now. They should be at the inn that's east of here. It was fun meeting you two. Until next time~

L'arc: Wait-!

*Just like that, the deity turns green mist, before disappearing, leaving L'arc & Therese alone in the shrine*

L'arc: Well...that was an interesting event...

Therese: ...L'arc...

L'arc: Yeah?

Therese: ...How did he know about Glass & Kizuna? As well as where they are?

L'arc: ...

#the rising of the shield hero #TheRuFumi #Gods & Goddesses Au #Naofumi Iwatani #L'arc Berg #Therese Alexandrite #Ancient Deity!Naofumi #Naofumi is a long forgotten god #That was sealed away by a powerful mage #Until L'arc & Therese decide to free him #Naofumi might be slightly unhinged due to spending centuries alone with like zero human interaction #Chat #this ended up way longer than intended #sorry

[verdemoth]

Fallen London (and etc) worldbuilding headcanon: Neath Sign Language

I’ve rambled about this idea on discord before but i’m thinking about it again so i’ll rehash the deal here. l’m thinking abt disability in the setting of Fallen London and how cool sign languages are so i liked the idea of culture in the Neath having developed a distinct manual language.

my perspective comes from ASL classes (not fluent, it’s been years since then) and some independent background research on sign languages in general when i fixated on this topic so i can’t go in depth about the actual mechanics of the language because it is not even based on ASL and i am not up to the task of writing a manual conlang as cool as that would be. Also it’s hard to research what it might have in common with extant sign languages in our world because detailed records earlier than the 19th century are really rare, but also this is MY fantastical alternate history fixation and I get to chose the accessibility!!! so this is a preface that some headcanons i have may not have a whole lot of basis in the real world. it’s not *implausible* because deaf people have existed since forever and there have been Some forms of gestural communication since 5th century BC. in my version of history Deaf communities get to have more influence than they have irl

anyway I called it Neath (Neathian?) Tactile Sign Langage, or NTSL. The tactile bit is relevant because it was for the most part developed underground where there are few natural light sources. It’s versatile, the tactile and visual elements complement each other but aren’t both required to be understood. Like ASL and i assume most other sign languages it does have a reliance on facial cues to convey tone as vocal speech does on its own, but there’s probably an equivalent for solely tactile sign? I don’t have an immediate idea but I’m sure there would be some way of doing so.

NTSL predates Fallen London and actually any records of modern sign we know of. The main bulk of the language was derived from Fourth City citizens, though in the time it’s had to develop since the 13th century it’s very much become its own distinct language and does not resemble modern Mongolian Sign Language at all. NTSL cannot be understood by knowing another sign language as it’s not closely related to any and may have entirely distinct roots to the most common ones? Even the ones that have any relation it would be like assuming that because you know English you can understand something like Greenlandic Norse. Different ball game all together. Anyway since London’s fall there’s been a little bit of influence from British Sign Language but mostly just slang and a few other loanwords.

And speaking of BSL! London. If I remember right, Fallen London the city canonically is not a fan of languages that are not English (i’m certain i recall that being stated outright but i don’t remember which game or where). I think that extends even to BSL but it is used when ‘necessary’ and seen as preferable to other forms of sign. In the modern Neath, NTSL in London is associated with commoners and ‘foreigners’, the later usually being people from communities out in the Unterzee. Because NTSL sees a lot of use out there! In the Khanate and Tomb Colonies especially it is common as a second (or first!) language, and it’s useful enough for zailors that most pick it up and spread awareness and practice of the language. There are different regional dialects of the language. Multiple islands and continents, they’re bound to develop their own variations. Some are more cross compatible than others but the language barrier isn’t Too large, not enough to be separate languages

In the Sunless Skies timeline, NTSL also crosses the Avid Horizon! It has perhaps become even more common among independent skyfarers. On any crew you’re basically guaranteed to get several people with a conversational level of fluency, regardless of whether they’re deaf or hearing. The Reach leans more into visual NTSL as the light of the sun allows communication at a greater distance. Eleutheria *extensively* relies upon the tactile variant. Most of Albion still uses BSL

#fallen london #sunless sea #sunless skies #fallen london headcanon #chatter #disclaimer im not deaf/hoh or part of the Deaf community i’m just very interested in the topic #anyone is welcome to use this/take insp/pick apart ideas from this and do your own thing #frowns. it deleted a paragraph #tumblr hates formatting paragraphs #i’ve replaced it in this version but it’s not in my additional reblog

[bugmatics]

A WHOLE BUNCH OF GASTER HEADCANONS

your best jesterfriend is here to spew words at you.

gaster has always been a favorite character of mine since my undertale days and i wanted to share some personal headcanons of mine. a lot of these are self projections whoops

now buckle up cause here we go:

red is specifically royal scientist gaster, green is specifically gaster now, and regular is how theyve always been

-he/they pronouns while they were a scientist, started using they/it after being shattered across time and space whoops

-aroace ! not romance repulsed, just doesnt want to be in relationships. in terms of gender, they dont really have a label for it. it likes to use masculine and neutral terms, or no honorifics if possible

-skeleton tail because i can (sans and papyrus have one too). out of the three, gaster had the middle length one (papyrus having the longest). it doesnt have it anymore and they miss it sometimes

-mostly speaks in wingdings, but uses sign language to communicate. it's also a selective mute

-prefers little to no contact, VERY close friends and family are mostly exceptional

-not related to sans and papyrus, but theyre a parental figure to them ! sans got his love for puns from them, and gaster gave papyrus some puzzles to solve when he was younger (which lead to how he is now with puzzles)

-only curses when theyre upset or stressed, other times it doesnt have a need to curse

-gaster blasters were always part of their magic but made a replica of them, whether to be used as a separate weapon or an injection to a monster's soul so they can use it as magic. sans and papyrus were the only ones that received the injections, and alphys got the separate weapon version (this is just how i think of it idk)

-they were pretty serious about their work as a scientist, but he had his silly moments sometimes. now theyre silly 24/7 since they dont have important science work to worry about

-was almost never serious around sans and papyrus. sans a bit more since he was more involved with gaster's work but always goofed off whenever it was possible

-i like to think that skeletons dont really have to eat but some choose to. only downside is how picky they can be with food selections. gaster will probably eat/drink whatever looks appetizing at the moment, but if they had to choose they would always pick coffee. if they need rest, they can sleep/take a nap. and you can DEFINITELY bet that gaster had a terrible sleep schedule

-i can imagine that food isnt an easy access in the void, so gaster cant eat. they dont need to but the more they see good food, the more it craves. the only thing it can get is eggs. dont question how, because i dont think gaster knows either

-gaster was always pretty powerful, with plenty of training and possible self experiments. they never had the need to fight however, so he just uses their magic for work. but he gave a few helping hands during the war...

-was very socially awkward. ESPECIALLY if the human/monster they were talking to didnt understand sign language. now it's fully capable of communicating with anyone, but sometimes theyre...difficult to understand. to others it make things complicated, but to gaster theyre just talking normally ! it doesnt entirely get that others dont understand things the same way they do

-lowkey likes to receive compliments and gifts. theyll brush off compliments or give a simple thanks to whoever said it, but the wagging tail really gives it away. the same goes for gifts, he will always keep whatever gifts they got and store them somewhere safe and hidden. they give a fond smile whenever they pass by his shelves filled with gifts they got

-he loves collecting mugs. they can be gifted a mug for every occasion and he will LOVE it. you would see them with a different mug everyday

-gaster can almost mimic voices perfectly, it just comes out heavily distorted with a slight mix of wing dings

-its body is unstable and can only form a physical body for a little bit. the only thing they can freely change is the size of their goop body

-i dont entirely (keyword: ENTIRELY) think that gaster was responsible for how jevil and spamton turned out but if they were, it was not intentional. it said a few things that they thought of either because they simply wanted to share or curiosity got to the best of it with how many strings they were able to pull. they REALLY dont have any bad intentions and it would fix their mistakes if they could but communication isnt the easiest

-being shattered across time and space sounds like being everywhere at everytime. a little bit of gaster everywhere, scattered pieces of a forgotten scientist for people to see if theyre lucky. depending on where youre from, gaster was either from a whole different universe or used to be part of your own. to gaster, it doesnt feel like theyre everywhere. it's slow steps to them, yet everything feels familiar like theyve done it before. kinda hard to explain this one but im gonna hope that someone has an idea on what the hell im saying

i also hit gaster with my autism beam so im gonna throw some stim headcanons at you.

regular:

-organizing

-whistling/humming/faintly singing tunes

-"ghost hands" (t-rex arms but i like to call them ghost hands)

-fiddling with their tail with its fingers

-snapping fingers

when stressed/upset/etc:

-pacing

-coiling tail tightly around their legs

-clenching and unclenching fists

-biting at fingertips

-excessive cleaning (both body and surroundings)

-clawing at arms and/or hands

PLEASE share any headcanons you might have for them please please please theyre so silly to me i love it so much

#feel kinda bad for adding this to the main tags but i need to share this #if i continue to contain my thoughts i will explode #these are all over the place for me this SUCKS but it's fine ig #wd gaster #gaster #wing dings gaster #utdr #utdr fanart #undertale #deltarune #bug.txt

[alostlittleriverlotus]

i feel like I'm not even real cause of this. But like seeing people compare Koraidon/Miraidon in Pokemon having trauma and a mental block and joking they have depression is so weird to me.

Like I'm hyperfixated on this cause I feel like I'm living in a different reality. Like. The game describes it as Korai/Mirai having a mental block that keeps them from entering their fighting mode because of a bad experience. And that's depression??? Even as a joke what??? Mirai/Korai just won't enter their battle mode cause of an incident that happened so much so they will be trembling with fear when entering the area and again and won't come out of their pokeball. It left them injured and now they freeze up and don't want to enter their battle form. That's...not depression. Just because someone has some mental issue in media isn't automatically depression. Am I being too autistic about this and being precise about specific language surrounding a joke? Genuinely don't know if it should be bothering me this much but it does.

It also just frustrates me cause I see depression and anxiety used in a way that overlooks more psychotic and trauma based disorders a lot. It's not always someone with depression or anxiety that does it, it's neurotypicals a lot of the time though it still happens within the community too.

I'm not super confident on this and I just. This is something that bothers me a lot with characters/media being instantly turned to depression just cause it's not neurotypical even if it's not even depression symptoms??? Like a little sad and suddenly it's depression??? Even when it's not chronic or anything???

Again, this makes me feel crazy and have like a loss of touch with reality so I'm not super certain in this, but I run into these experiences a lot which is why i often avoid fandoms and stuff surrounding my comfort characters or any relatable character. Cause I know what I see as a personality disorder or ptsd will be labelled as depression and they'll call it a day. But it also bothers me how that creates an idea of depression that isn't depression. And anxiety too, but since the joke called it depression, in sticking to that.

But like Mirai/Korai aren't depressed. They're having fear reactions to things that are reminiscent of their trauma like their battle form. That's more akin to anxiety.

I just. I don't get it. I don't effing get it. And I've seen it in far more ableist ways before, this was just a joke that has bothered me. I guess since I have seen ableism surrounding depression/anxiety being separated from more psychotic and trauma based disorders and it being used to overshadow personality disorders like how a character is relatable with depression, but if you mention they're BPD/NPD coded, you'll be told you're just projecting and wrong and it's not canon so we shouldn't assume things even tho most BPD and especially NPD representation is super ableist.

Maybe I just see it a lot so I'm "salty" and defensive. But I hate how the awareness surrounding depression/anxiety/mental health has turned into this corny thing focused entirely around them as if they're the only disorders and also creates this simplified image of the disorders which also ignores the real hardships of them. Like how the "easier" symptoms are accepted, but people are crap to those that can't manage their anxiety or struggle to get out of bed or shower cause of depression. But am I the only one encountering this? Cause this kinda stuff makes me delusional AF and feel like I'm the only one seeing it and makes me really out of touch with if I'm right or wrong in my response and my emotions.

It also reminds me of when characters are neurodivergent, but if you try to say they're coded or headcanoned as that, then you get told it's not canon so we can't say that, there's no likeness, and there's no way they could be it. I see that particularly with autism headcanons/autism coding. Where people will list characters they see as autistic coded especially since bad rep is still common and they get told the characters aren't autistic at all and they're making autism some trendy thing too. I dunno, this is why I stay away from fandoms when it comes to comfort characters I see as coded with a disorder or I headcanon that way to cope with my stuff.

But I'm def a bit salty since I'll get thrown under the bus for NPD and ASPD and other psychotic disorders seeing what little rep we get taken and written over as depression regardless of whether the character gets depressed or experiences symptoms does make me salty, even if it's a joke. Like the game even outright calls Mirai/Korai's issue psychological trauma. If anything, joke that it's anxiety since they experience anxiety/anxious feelings when being confronted with their triggers which fear responses happen with PTSD or other trauma disorders. I feel so weird for getting upset as a joke and I'm probably being too precise/particular over the wording of it, but man, it just bothers me and reminds me of all of this stuff.

Ultimately the joke isn't a big deal, but I just wanted to especially bring up these thoughts I've been having and the things I've noticed with how depression and anxiety are treated like this, used to overlook other stuff but also being simplified into any kind of negative thing experienced is automatically "oh no they have depression/anxiety lol." Reminds me of the "so ocd" stuff with perfectionism and neatness in a way too with the wording.

Late Edit: Found out this has some roots in the capitalist thing with mental health/illness where we will gladly speak about depression/anxiety especially in a way to sell a product, but still be super ableist to actual peeps with anxiety and depression. This isn't strictly about it, but I've been thinking over why it feels this way. And again, this isn't typically at any depression/anxiety folks (tho they can have internalized ableism too like BPD folks turning on NPD and ASPD over on tiktok), but typically the sort of way it's commodified and normalized to something beyond disorders where even basic emotions get turned into anxiety/depression. Basically forgetting, hey, these are legitimate disorders. And I think that's what I was getting at and that's more of the root of it + the ableism within the mental health community against personality disorders. Like most people either don't know PDs exist, will defend using outdated ableist terms, or won't even know what kind of discrimination we face. So for those reasons I'm a bit more defensive.

#depression #personality disorders #ableism #trauma #I dunno what to tag this #just mental health #mental health #mental health community #mental disorders #mental illness #I see this stuff a lot tbh #anxiety #gad #actually autistic #actually disabled #actually narcissistic #actually borderline #actually histrionic #actually antisocial #/nm #/gen #/srs #I struggle with tone and communicating

[recentlylocal]

Agape and 'til I reach you for....1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 9, 11? Actually, if you just wanted to ramble on about those fics, that would work too

Send me writing questions!

WELL TWIST MY ARM I GUESS

I blame Moira Quirk’s audio book narration for ‘til I reach you, because that scene absolutely CRUSHED ME when I listened to it. I was very no thoughts, head empty about writing it otherwise, it was once of those snippets that just fell into my head fully formed. I wrote and edited the whole thing in half a day. As a fic it made a nice home for a lot of my meta-thoughts about Camilla’s story and how she’s just...put up with so goddamn much in this series. Poor Camilla, Queen of Hypovolemic Shock.

I will also take this moment to point out that Camilla has the line “it’s just a flesh wound,” in this fic, which is 100% an intentional Monty Python reference, and I am shocked nobody yelled at me about that one in the comments.

Agape, on the other hand, took me FOUR MONTHS so I have way more thoughts.

1. What inspired you to write the fic this way? I got a Nona arc in July and of course the knuckle kiss scene sent me spiraling. I drafted a couple of scenes really soon after I read it, and then figured if I could come up with a few more I could format it as a 5+1 instead of just a snippet. (Side note but 5+1s are apparently fandom old school now?)

2. What scene did you first put down? I actually wrote them more or less in the order they appear in the fic which is VERY unusual for me, I usually write out of order and then stitch everything together. I considered re-ordering them chronologically before I posted but I liked the dreamy sort of atmosphere of skipping around, felt more true to how someone would actually be recalling a bunch of related memories.

3. What’s your favorite line of narration? "She said nothing, because every word she could conceive of was even worse than this awful, broken silence." Felt really good about this one, especially since it was like the ninth time in this fic I had to come up with another emotionally charged way to describe Cam not saying anything.

Honorable mention to “Seis muttered something about teenagers with God-complexes“ because can you imagine how insufferable those two would have been at fourteen??

4. What’s your favorite line of dialogue? I struggle to pick between any of the dialogue in snippet #3 (everyone is being SO bitchy in that one which was fun for me) but "four hours ago you called it a placebo" still makes me giggle AND I migrated it over from a scene I cut from two corpses, so I was happy to re-home it.

ALSO I really enjoy Pal’s “I could find the courage to walk backwards into hell, would I know that you were behind me” vis a vis this dril tweet.

5. What part was hardest to write? Cam's dialogue always takes a long time to write because she says so much with so few words, I have a separate, specific editing process JUST for her lines (which is a whole other post.) Of all the snippets, #6 was hardest to write because it was SO charged, and it was a rare moment of writing Cam and Pal not seeing eye to eye.

9. Were there any alternate versions of this fic? Well there was an alternate version where I didn't write an entire extra scene so it was actually a 5+1 and not a 6+1 😆 I briefly considered cutting a scene when I realized my mistake, but I'd sunk way too much effort in at that point and I was attached to all of them.

11. What do you like best about this fic? I tend to write too much dialogue and not enough description of what’s happening around the dialogue, and I really worked at writing body language and emotional pauses into this one. It’s something I really struggle with (writing body language especially), and I'm really happy with how well I managed in this fic, it was a really good writing exercise for me. 

#fic writing #asks #thank you so much for sending!!

[readingsquotes]

"Since October 7, 2023, we have seen how the US media has a separate set of rules when discussing the total war being waged on the civilians of Gaza. With more than 35,000 dead, an unprecedented number of child amputees, and over a million at risk for starvation, the urgency to decode media obfuscation of a genocide has never been greater. Much has been written about this, especially after were revealed The New York Times’ language constrictions that limit how writers should discuss the current attacks on Gaza. "

...

The goal is to chill the discourse and to make sure people are scared. None of this is by accident. We now know that the Israeli government formed a task force to target American campuses and intimidate students and faculty and administrators into silence. And Congress has also joined in, holding hearings and interrogating university administrators about student protests at high-profile campuses like Harvard and Columbia, knowing full well it will trickle down and spread fear through other institutions. In that sense, I think you really can describe it as neo-McCarthyism. It’s designed to create a climate of fear and stamp out the expression of ideas. And there’s a logic behind it. Universities are one of the last places left in this country where there’s any kind of debate and diversity of opinion on the Israel-Palestine issue. So that has to be shut down. It’s deeply anti-intellectual in addition to being profoundly antidemocratic.

...

"...the same propaganda patterns we’ve been analyzing in our films for years when it comes to wars waged by the US or with US backing, from Vietnam to Iraq. First and foremost, there’s been no sustained coverage of the US’s role in Israel’s mass killing of Palestinians. Instead, it appears the US is doing everything in its power to help protect Palestinian civilians and restrain Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. The extent of US complicity in Israeli atrocities in Gaza, especially the fact we’re supplying most of the weapons to carry them out, is mostly hidden from view. Likewise, in keeping with media coverage of other US and US-backed wars in the past, the killing of tens of thousands of Palestinian civilians has been repeatedly described as “unintended” and “unfortunate” rather than the entirely predictable result of Israel dropping tens of thousands of US-made bombs on civilian centers in Gaza. In addition, we now know that reporters have been encouraged by their bosses to use sanitizing language to describe the horrors unfolding in Gaza, to avoid using words and phrases like “ethnic cleansing,” “genocide,” and “occupied territories.” As media critic Norman Solomon has argued, the result is a dominant media narrative that tells Americans that Israeli lives matter a lot more than Palestinian lives.

#The Occupation of the American Mind #palestine #free palestine #isreal #genocide #gaza #apartheid #colonization #us politics #american imperialism #media coverage #neo-McCarthyism

[theleftovertaco]

Love Languages

Had a though about which love languages each of the boys would subscribe to (receiving, not giving, if you want me to make that one I probably can)

People mentioned: Harry, Fred, George, Neville, Ron, Oliver, Draco

Harry

Harry likes physical touch.

As a child he barely got any affection from people, and he was initially uncomfortable showing much of any physical affection

However, once you openly showed him said affection, the two of you were attached at the hip.

It does not matter where you are, if your in the same room, your probably touching in some way.

If it’s a large public setting, it’s likely just pinkies, hands, or arms that are linked. But in the presence of close friends he’ll gladly return a hug, and when you’re alone it’s an entirely different story.

He will literally flop on top of you, hold onto you, and hold you until you’ve both fallen asleep.

He also enjoys sitting on your lap or you sitting on his lap.

Stroke his hair or run your fingers on his face or over his eyes and he will melt

Anyways yea Harry is a cuddle whore

Fred

Fred likes quality time

You don’t always spend every moment next to each other, boundaries are really important to both of you and you both respect those boundaries.

But when you are together, it is the best time either of you could have.

Sneaking into the kitchens at 3 am to eat sweets.

Shopping at Hogsmeade, getting butterbeer, watching muggle movies

If you like practical jokes you gladly take part in them, if not then he respects that.

Sometimes he just wants someone to listen to him.

So he’ll lay next to you and just talk, for hours.

About school, about his latest pranks, about family.

If you can use the time you have together in a way that makes you both happy, then he will love you forever.

To him, it’s not about the amount of time you spend with him, it’s about what you both do with it.

George

George likes words of affirmation- he always feels like he lives in his siblings shadow

Occasionally that means living in Fred’s shadow too.

People never really acknowledge them as separate people, and sometimes he needs reassurance that someone sees him as an individual.

Telling him on a daily basis, that you see him as a separate person, even if you don’t have to say those exact words, is important to him.

He also just really likes hearing that you believe in and love him

Within 2 weeks of you dating he greets you with an “I love you.”

And at first he freezes when he realizes what it is that he said.

But when you reply with reciprocation he melts.

The first time you tell him you love him, he practically combusts with happiness.

This could also translate to a praise kink but we’re not gonna talk about that rn ;)

Neville

Neville prefers gifts

Not necessarily expensive ones, just small little things, trinkets and such

If you just hand him a shiny rock he lets out this little trill of happiness and adds it to his collection alongside his plants

If you give him a plant he'll fucking collapse.

Once when you came back from a trip over Christmas, you gave him seeds to a rare plant that wasn't found in Europe, he nearly burst from excitement

That was the first time he kissed you in public

He also really likes candy and once when you brought him these little rock candies that were only found in muggle stores he practically ripped the wrapper off and shoved them into his mouth.

(He shared of course)

Neville often gets his fathers hand-me-downs, and while he enjoys them, it sucks that his grandmother refuses to buy him anything of his own

So when you buy him a sweater and a pair of slacks he almost cries

Sugar baby Neville au i said what i said

Ron

Ron likes acts of service

A lot of it is when you help him with things like homework

Sometimes Hermione is too tired or unwilling to and when you step in to help where you can, its like a little piece of him falls in love with you all over again

But part of it is other forms of service

A few months before you were together, Ron had a really bad day and returned to the common room with a huge headache, and when you offered to give him a head massage he decided he was gonna ask you out

Sometimes just running your hands through his hair after a long day makes him absolutely melt into the couch cushions

He also often gets homesick, especially when it comes to food, and if you cook or bake for him, he practically jumps in the fucking air

You called his mom once to get a recipe for these Christmas cookies that he missed since he couldn’t go home for Christmas one year and if you both hadn’t been in public he would have cried

When you brought him homemade candies he did cry (he’d had a long day, let him live)

But yea sometimes he just needs someone to take care of him nothing wrong with that my dudes

Oliver

Oliver likes an even mix of gifts and and acts of service tbh

Often for Christmas or his birthday you’ll get him a new broom servicing kit or a book about Puddlemere United

One year you managed to get one of his favorite books signed by some of Puddlemere’s players

When you presented it to him he tackled you in a hug so tight you thought your lungs would pop.

He also really likes trying new candies so you get him a subscription box where he can try new ones from around the world and the two of you spend a few days every month trying new candies together for a year.

When it comes to acts of service its a little more physical

Quidditch takes a toll on a person's body so often he'll come back from a game or a practice and just collapse.

So if you give him a massage he'll practically sink into the bed.

Dude is just tired sometimes give him a break

Draco

Draco is probably into words of affirmation

I think people would assume it's gifts but that's actually how he shows love to other people because that's how his parents showed love to him even though it's not necessarily what he wants

But yeah I think Draco sometimes deals with a lot of shit especially during 6-7 year and so he's probably stressed as shit

And feeling really guilty about what he's having to do

But he feels like he has no choice or else he and his parents are going to die.

So sometimes he just needs reassurance that he's not a terrible person

Occasionally after working on the cabinet in the ROR he'll just go to you and collapse on your shoulder and start sobbing

Sometimes just making sure he knows that he's okay and that he's loved will make him want to cry

Anyways Draco Malfoy redemption arc

#harry potter x reader #harry potter headcanon #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley headcanons #george weasley x reader #george weasley headcanon #neville longbottom x reader #neville longbottom headcanons #ron weasley x reader #ron weasley headcanon #oliver wood x reader #oliver wood headcanon #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy headcanon

[nevermindirah]

Do you have any thoughts on the use of AAVE for Nile (or lack thereof) in TOG fanfiction? I've been reading some Book of Nile fic and some writers seem to write her as a Millennial™ (using words like "fave" and "woke") but never acknowledge her Blackness in her patterns of speech. I know we don't see her use as much AAVE in the films, but I would argue she's in situations where code-switching would be valued (first in a "professional" environment in the army, then around a group of non-Black strangers).

Hi anon! I have many thoughts on this and I'm honored you asked me! But I should start by saying I'm white and any thoughts Black fans and especially Black American fans have on this that they want to share would be beyond lovely. (I'm not gonna tag anybody bc that feels rude but please add onto this post if any of y'all see this and want to!)

The main reason I personally avoid AAVE for Nile in my own fics is because I'm not Black. But Nile-centric fics by Black writers tend to avoid using much of it too, at least from what I've noticed/understood, and my guess is it's largely for the reason you mention, that she's in situations that encourage code-switching.

In movie canon Nile is highly competent at tailoring her language to each situation she finds herself in. This fantastic linguistics analysis meta shows how skillfully Nile chooses her vocabulary and grammar to meet her goals with different conversation partners in different contexts. In comics canon Nile had a bunch of different civilian jobs before joining the Marines, so she would've had experience code-switching in the ways that made sense for all those different contexts as well as the Marines and her family and high school and wherever else she spent her time before we met her. And now she's spending her time with a handful of immortals none of whom are native English speakers and a fellow Black American but one with a Queen's English UK accent whose professional experience is in the CIA where high-status code-switching is often an absolute must for success or even survival.

Fics featuring Nile are charged with extrapolating from that to how it might show up in her use of language that she's coping with a traumatic separation from her family and her career and pretty much everything she's ever known and now she needs to be able to make herself understood to people who seem to care about her and each other but are super duper in crisis, three (soon to be four) of whom predate Modern English entirely and the only one who's anywhere near her contemporary she's not supposed to talk to for a century. All of these people are telling her that pretty much any contact with any mortals poses an existential threat to her and the rest of the group. How the FUCK is she supposed to cope with that, like, generally? And would it be a more effective way for her to cope if she talked to Andy Joe and Nicky using the speech patterns that she used to use with her mom and brother, to at least retain that part of her identity even if it means having to do a lot of explaining, or would it meet her needs better to prioritize Andy Joe and Nicky understanding what she means with her words over using the particular words and grammar forms she used with her family?

I've seen several fics, both Nile-centric / BoN and otherwise, explore this a little bit in how/whether Nile uses Millennial™ speak. It's often a theme in Nile texting Booker despite the exile because of the popular headcanon that he as The Tech Guy is the only other immortal who understands memes. But Nile's much-younger-than-Booker mom probably uses Boomer and/or Gen X memes and Andy has been adapting to new communication styles for forever as evidenced by her canon high level of fluency with standard-American-accented English.

Which brings us back to people avoiding AAVE because they're not Black and they don't want to make mistakes (or they're not Black and they don't want to get yelled at for making mistakes, though I think many people overestimate how much they'll get yelled at while underestimating how much these mistakes can hurt). I can imagine some Black fans hold back from using much AAVE in fic because they don't want to share in-group stuff with white people who are likely to then adopt and ruin it, as white people so often do with Black cultural stuff. Some links about this including a great Khadija Mbowe video. I'm saying this gently, anon, because you might not know: woke, an example you cited as Millennial™ speak, is AAVE, and that's gotten erased by so many white people appropriating it and using it incorrectly online.

And also there's the part where fandom is a hobby and you never know when you're reading a fic that's the very first thing someone's ever written outside of a school assignment. This cultural considerations of language shit takes a level of effort and skill that not everybody puts into every fic, or even could if they wanted to because they haven't had time to build their skills yet. It's definitely easier for non-Black fans to project our millennial feels onto Nile than to do the layers of research and self-reflection it requires to depict what Blackness might mean to Nile, and it's not surprising that often people sharing their hobby creations on the internet have gone the easier route. There's not even necessarily shame in doing what's easier. It's just frustrating and often hurtful when structural white supremacy means that 3-dimensional Black characters are rare in media and thoughtful explorations of them in fandom are seen by the majority of fans as not-easy to make and therefore Nile Freeman, the main character in The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Bythewood, has the least fic and meta and art made about her of our 5 main immortals.

I've been active in different fandoms off and on for twenty years and I barely managed to write 5,000 words about Sam Wilson across multiple different fics in the 7 years since I fell in love with him. There's an alchemy to which characters we connect with, and on top of that which characters we connect with in a way that causes us to create stuff about them. Something about Nile Freeman finally tipped me over the edge from a voracious reader to a voracious writer. It's not for me to judge which characters speak to other individuals to the level of creating content about them, but I do think it's important for us to notice, and then work to fight, the pattern where across this fandom as a whole Nile gets way less content, and way less depth in so much of the content that's in theory about her, than any of these other characters.

Anyway, back to language. My two long fics feature Nile with several Black friends — Copley and OCs and cameos from other media — but all of those characters except Alec Hardison from Leverage aren't American. It's very possible I'm guilty of stereotyping Black British speech patterns in I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore. I watched hours and hours of Black haircare YouTube videos in the research for that fic and I modeled my OCs' speech patterns on what I heard from some of those YouTubers as well as what I've heard people like John Boyega and Idris Elba saying in interviews, but the thing about doing your best is you still might fuck up.

I'm slowly making progress on my WIP where Nile and Sam Wilson are cousins, and what ways of talking with a family member might be authentic for Nile is a major question I need to figure out. For that, I'm largely modeling my writing choices on how I hear my Black friends and colleagues talking to each other. I haven't overheard colleagues talking in an office in a long-ass time, but back when that was a thing, I remember seeing a ton of nuance in the different ways many of my Black colleagues would talk to each other. Different people have different personalities! And backgrounds! And priorities! A few jobs ago my department was about 1/3 Black and we worked closely with Obama administration staff many of whom were Black and there was SO MUCH VARIETY in how Black people talked to each other, about work and workplace-appropriate personal stuff, where I and other white coworkers could hear. There are a few work friends in particular who I have in my head when I'm trying to imagine how Sam and Nile might talk to each other. From the outside looking in, God DAMN is shit complicated, intellectually and interpersonally and spiritually, for Black people who are devoting their professional lives to public service in the United States.

One more aspect of this that I have big thoughts on but I need to take extra care in talking about is the idea of acknowledging Nile's Blackness in her patterns of speech. There's no one right way to be Black, and Nile's a fictional character created by a white dude but there are plenty of real-life Black Americans who don't use much or even any AAVE, for reasons that are complicated because of white supremacy. (Highly highly recommend this video by Shanspeare on the harms of the Oreo stereotype.)

Something that's not the same but has enough similarity that I think it's worth talking about is my personal experience with authenticity and American Jewish speech patterns. My Jewish family members don't talk like they're in The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, and I've known lots of people who do talk that way (or the millennial version of it), some of whom have questioned my Jewishness because I don't talk that way. That hurts me. Sometimes when another Jew tells me some shit like "I've never heard a Jew say y'all'd've," I can respond with "well now you have asshole, bless your Yankee-ass heart," because the myth of Dixie is a racist lie but I will totally call white Northerners Yankees when they're being shitty to me for being Southern, and this particular Jew fucking revels in using "bless your heart" with maximum polite aggression, especially with said Yankees. But sometimes I don't have it in me to say anything and it just quietly hurts having an important part of me disbelieved by someone who shares that important part of me. The sting isn't quite the same when non-Jews disbelieve or discount my Jewishness, but that hurts too.

Who counts as authentically Jewish is a messy in-group conversation and it doesn't really make sense to explain it all here. Who counts as authentically Jewish is a matter of legal status for immigration, citizenship, and civil rights in Israel, and it's my number 2 reason after horrific treatment of Palestinians that I'm antizionist. But outside that extremely high-stakes legal situation, it can just feel really shitty to not be recognized as One Of Us, especially by your own people.

It can also feel really shitty to be The Only One of Your Kind in a group, even if that group is an immortal chosen family who all loves each other dearly. Sometimes especially in a situation like that where you know those people love you but there are certain things they don't get about you and will never quite be able to. I'm definitely projecting at least a little bit of my "lonely Jew who will be alone again for yet another Jewish holiday" stuff onto Nile when at the end of I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore she's thinking about being the only Black immortal and moving away from the community she'd built with a mostly-Black group of mortals in that fic. Maybe that tracks, or maybe that's fucked up of me.

Basically, this got very long but it's complicated, writing about experiences that aren't your own takes skill which in turn takes time and practice to build, writing about experiences not your own that our society maligns can cause a lot of harm if done badly, it can also cause a lot of harm when a large enough portion of a fandom just decides to nope out of something that's difficult and risky because then there's just not much content about a character who deserves just a shit ton of loving and nuanced content, people are individuals and two people who come from the exact same cultural context might show that influence in all kinds of different ways, identity is complicated, language is complicated, writing is hard, and empathy and humility and doing our best aren't a guarantee of avoiding harm but they do go a long way in helping people create thoughtful content about a character as awesome and powerful and kind and messy and scared and curious and WORTHY as Nile Freeman.

#nile freeman #linguistics #TOG POC Love Fest #nileweek2021 #tog meta #tog #long post #mine #antiblackness #jewish things #hi i'm an antizionist jew no i don't really want to talk about it

[slightlyrebelliouswriter23]

Writing smut without cringing the whole time? How do you do it.

Writing Smut 101: Overcoming Smut Shame

CONTENT WARNING: NSFW RELATED CONTENT BELOW.

The short answer, nonnie, is: you don’t. 

That is to say, writing smut is always kind of cringe—especially if you’re new to it, or simply “not in the mood” to write. 

But rest assured, feeling embarrassed is completely natural. The trick is learning how to overcome the cringe when it does happen, instead of letting it deter you.

I’m going to break this up into a few sections: 1) Why you might be feeling this way, 2) How I, personally, combat the issue, and 3) Some more tips that might help you get the ball rolling.

1. Why You “Cringe”

It’s important to find the root cause of any form of writer’s block so you can pull the weed out instead of just trimming it back. Smut writer’s block is its own special brand, and generally, the main issue writers have when it comes to smut is stigma.

Speaking openly and honestly about sex, in Western society, is still very much a taboo.

No matter how “progressive” we like to think we are, the inherent shame surrounding pleasure-seeking experiences, and the detailing/consumption of them, has been ground into us since we learned how to understand the concept of gratification.

And I’m not just talking about sexual gratification. This applies to everyday things, as well. Eating, shopping, relaxing (or doing virtually anything in capitalist society that does not directly contribute to capitalism).

So it makes sense that you would feel any amount of embarrassment, awkwardness, or “cringe” when writing smut. It’s something our society teaches us is wrong to want. Unfortunately, that shame translates to writer’s block when we sit down in front of the computer.

A lot of this blockage might stem from not giving ourselves permission to write the thing.

We’re staring at the blank document, knowing we want to write smut, and suddenly the thoughts start streaming in: This feels wrong, is this wrong? What if someone comes in and looks over my shoulder while I’m writing? Am I describing this right? Is this too unrealistic? I have NO idea what I’m doing, and everyone is going to know it.

These are all perfectly normal thoughts, and definitely ones I still have from time to time. But they’re also probably the direct cause of why you feel so blocked. Luckily, I have some bits of advice to give you on how to unblock yourself.

2. How I Combat Smut Block

✦ First, when the intrusive thoughts occur, instead of ruminating on them, think of each one as an impermanent object. You can use any metaphor, but I like to use the imagery of leaves:

Each negative thought is a leaf floating down the river of your mind. If you focus only on the leaf, you’ll exert a lot of energy running to try and keep up with it, consequently miss everything else around you. But if you acknowledge that leaf as a temporary part of the scenery, and let is pass, you can process and appreciate the beauty of your surroundings a whole lot better.

Remember: you are separate from your thoughts. You are not defined by them. The things you think sound stupid might be incredibly exciting to someone else. 

If you can string a sentence together, you can write smut. This is all part of giving yourself permission to write the thing that makes you feel uncomfortable.

✦ Second, I’d suggest giving good thought to how you personally experience embarrassment, how you experience excitement (of the sexual variety), and how those two might sometimes commingle or feel similar.

For me, they are very comparable, like different shades of the same emotion—but there are differences which are important to note. 

If I’m making myself blush from excitement, this is a very good thing for writing smut. It means that what I’m writing feels real enough to evoke something in the reader, even if the reader, like me, knows what’s going to happen.

If I’m making myself cringe, however, it may be time to take a step back and readjust my perspective.

✦ Third, ease yourself into it! Don’t jump straight in the deep end and expect to know how to keep your head above water if you’ve never swum before.

The way I eased myself into smut was first by writing “Steam”—a category of fic I made up because the current vocabulary lacked an efficient term for fics that straddled emotional romance and explicit content. 

Essentially, steam is smut-adjacent but not explicit, and here’s a step-by-step example of how I transitioned myself smoothly from one genre to the next:

I first wrote my fics Wicked Game and You Are (both of which feature either a heavy make out session or teasing + lots of sexual tension) with this “steam” concept in mind.

I wrote the first chapter of Fine Line, which has brief but explicit descriptions of fantasies, framed by a very sexually charged scene.

I released my fic Crashing, which is probably more of a bridge between Steam and Smut, and features soft-focus fingering. Nothing in it is explicit—it focuses more on the emotions than explicit detail—but it’s very clear what is happening.

After I wrote those, I felt just confident enough to make that final stride over the threshold into smut. I wrote my fics Holy, King, and the second chapter of Fine Line all within weeks of each other.

And trust me when I say, once you get the momentum going and receive that validation from people who’ve read your work, it becomes SO much easier to sit down and start writing. 

You just have to finish that first piece.

✦ Finally (and I know I’m going to sound cliche when I say this), just like any other skill, the more you practice the more confident you will feel and the better you will get. 

So practice, practice, practice! 

If you’re nervous about posting smut for the first time, have a trusted friend/mutual Beta read it for you. It’s the online equivalent to someone holding your hand before jumping off the cliff, and works wonders for the nerves.

3. Keep The Smut Rolling

Now that you have some tools to help get you past the blockage of writing smut, here’s how to keep the inspiration flowing.

✦ Start by incorporating smutty fanfiction/erotic fiction into your regular reading rotation- 

Of course AO3 is a fantastic resource for smutty fanfiction. 

If you’re a fan of TFOTA or ACOTAR and want some of my personal fic recs, visit my fic rec masterlist.

In terms of erotic fiction, my personal favourites are anything Anais Nin (specifically Henry & June and Delta of Venus), The Thornchapel series by Sierra Simone, The Godwicks series by Tiffany Reisz, and The Original Sinners series by Tiffany Reisz.

There are also sites like Literotica and sexstories.com, which play host to explicit short fiction (not fandom based).

✦ Next, I’d recommend having a designated digital space for smutspiration- 

This can be a list of “smutty” words/phrases kept on a separate document on your computer, for those days when you just can’t think of the right way to describe something. 

Or you can create a private side-blog or Pinterest board for your favourite smutty fanart or other kinds of visual smutspiration.

✦ For that matter, try following some smutty/18+ blogs (ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+) here on Tumblr-

Many of them have a plethora of what I like to call “lemony snippets”, a.k.a. short text posts that describe (usually in conversational language) explicit scenarios. 

This is useful because it will normalise the concept of sexual fantasies in your brain, making it less weird for you when you try to come up with ones of your own to write into smut. 

Not to mention, your dash will be rife with inspiration.

✦ I would also suggest checking out 18+ ASMR on YouTube (AGAIN, ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+). 

My favourite account is Professor Cal Official, but Auralescent also has some good content. 

Headphones are highly advisable for this, as their stuff is very dangerous for work.

So, nonnie, I hope this has provided you with at least one helpful tip. Whether you took anything away from this or not, just know that the feelings of embarrassment when it comes to writing smut are entirely normal. And the best way to keep those feelings at bay is to confront them head on. 

-Em 🖤🗡

Writing Advice Masterlist

Writing Masterlist

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