#but it's also a huge huge file so i am expecting the quality on this to be C RU N C H E D

[goblinbeetle]

They are all here

#wanted to do an oc line up to show off them all next to each other #compare their heights #body types #etc #!! very fun to do #but it's also a huge huge file so i am expecting the quality on this to be C RU N C H E D #I have no idea how people work on stuff like this without social media absolutely wrecking the quality PFSH #also my style is probably making it a wee bit harder as well-- PFSH #anyway #very fun ! #digital art #digital artwork #art #artwork #furry art #furry #original character #character #character design #oc #furry artwork #opossum #goat #bear #dog #canine #hybrid #cat #feline #seal

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I don't have time to write as much as I'd like right now, because annoyingly, I have to go to work all day before I can sit down and properly process last night's Grace Petrie concert (and watch the Taskmaster episode that I missed for the Grace Petrie concert, I have to do that). But I will say, you know how often at a show, even one you enjoy by someone you like, a small part of you is glad when it starts wrapping up? You start to wonder how much longer it'll go, just because there's a limit to how long we want to sit in one spot with strangers? "Often" is the wrong word, I've been to plenty of shows by my favourite people where that didn't happen. But at an average or even above average show, I start to hit my limit near the end.

Not even the tiniest bit in this one. When she said she only had two songs left, I was purely disappointed; absolutely nothing at the back of my mind thought "Oh good, it'll be nice to get back to my own bed." I could very, very happily have stayed there all night. It somehow exceeded my high expectations.

God, her voice. I think I hadn't fully appreciated how very good her singing voice is, just from a pure singing talent perspective. I knew it was good, I didn't realize just how good until I heard it all night, undiluted by the influence of recording file quality or speaker quality.

Also... I went up to the merch table at intermission. I did first buy a CD of an album that I already have off Bandcamp, and got her to sign it, as a ruse to show her that I am a normal person who wouldn't do something incredibly weird like bring someone else's poster to her show and ask her to sign it. The CD purchase was also a bribe - my parents taught me when I was young and going to folk festivals that singers hang around their merch table to make money; if you give them money for a CD then they won't mind you standing there talking to them for a short time, and sometimes it's worth buying a CD you already have as the price to briefly talk to your favourite singers while they sign it.

Then I pulled out this, and she was so nice about it. I said some incoherent thing like "I have such a strange request, I so hope you're not offended that it's someone else's thing, I'm a huge fan of your music not just the comedy, but I love the idea of having something signed by both of you so I'd love to get yours on this, because it's from close to the first year you toured together..."

"No, no, I'm not offended, Josie Long is one of my best friends! Can I take a picture of this to send her?" That was her answer as she signed it, and then she took a picture of that with her own phone. To send to Josie Long. In addition to the pictures my dad took on his phone and sent to me while I did this.

She played every song I wanted her to play (played much of the Connectivity album, which I think is her best one in addition to being her most recent). She closed on The Losing Side, my favourite song of hers, had the audience sing, that's going down as one of my favourite live music moments. Second last she did Black Tie, which I've always thought was very good but not quite her best one, maybe not as good as some others that seem less famous. But hearing it live gave me a new appreciation for it. I think the studio version I heard was more produced. Live with just her and her guitar and one guy accompanying her (Ben Moss, he was great, there were gorgeous harmonies all night), stripped back compared to the studio version, that song is so fucking beautiful. I understand the hype around it more now.

She got to the end and said only one more song, and I thought this night has been perfect so far, she's played all my favourites except my one top favourite, made a new favourite out of Black Tie for me... there's just one more thing I want, will I get it? Then she turned to her musical accompanyist Ben Moss, and mouthed some words that I was sure were "The Losing Side", and then I knew the night was perfect. The fact that she had to say that to him suggests to me she doesn't close with it every night, she had to let him know what to get ready to play. So I got lucky. So lucky. Fucking hell, so lucky. She had the audience sing the chorus and I didn't even mind that I'm normally not a partipator in these things and my dad was next to me (I'd thought we'd have different seats, turns out it was general admission), I happily participated and I'm glad I did. That's another song that really made me realize how amazing her voice is when I heard it in person.

Not a single song dragged or felt boring. Do you know rare it is to go an entire full length concert where not a single song feels a bit like filler? God, incredible night from start to finish. Could not have asked for more.

[mollybecameanengineer]

✨🌻💝 for the fic writer ask :)

Thanks for the ask, @lilolilyr! Here is the orignal post.

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

I have two answers for this. (As you all probably noticed) I've recently become fixated on the X-Files, but before that it was Star Trek: Voyager, so most of my fic is for that show. But I'll give one from each, because it's hard for me to consolidate the two. I was in a very different mental space writing Voyager (circa 2015-2017) than I am today.

For The X-Files: Keys,Wallet, Phone. It's the first one I wrote for this fandom, and it's very different than anything I'd written before. One of the asks on here was 'which fic would you like to be a podfic?' and this one would be my answer as well. It has a lyrical quality that I really like and I think would be great read aloud.

For Voyager: My baby, The Lament of a Daughter. This is all B'Elanna backstory... the culminations of years and years of thinking about this character. This, and The Sea of Gatan are probably some of the best things I ever wrote.

🌻what makes you want to give up on writing? what makes you keep going?

What makes me give up? Two things: anxiety and lack of head space.

For the anxiety bit, this is why I stopped writing in 2017. Trying to improve and what not was just driving me insane. This is also why, despite the fact I want to, I'll likely not participate in exchanges. When the prompt is right, it's magic. But man, it can really get to me if I can't think of anything. So this time around I've been posting things unbetaed (which likely leads to way more typos, sorry) but this has really been a path back to joy for me. Just write and release.

On lack of head space: I have a job that could consume every moment of my life if I let it. I have an idea for an original novel, which I started writing, but I found my mind was always preoccupied with it, and I wasn't thinking about my research (and therefore not making progress.) So, I don't really know what to do about that. The problem is less one of time, and more about have to pick and choose what I think about. (Which might be a weird problem to have.) It seems to work better for me to write short things to get the idea out of my head, and then move on. I am looking forward to a stage in my life where this won’t be an issue anymore.

Moving on to what makes me keep going: it’s fun (if I'm not busy being my own worse enemy). I like getting my thoughts out of my head and I like the reaction others have to those thoughts. Most of my stories are about something that is going on in my life, so it’s cathartic (or amusing, depending on what it is) to put OTP of the week in those situations. Sometimes I wonder if I could write professionally, but I do that would remove the fun and the joy. I do like my job, but there are for sure times that are NOT joyful.

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

Well, I didn't expect people to like Qualifying Life Events this much! I wrote it in like an hour on Monday when the internet went out, so I couldn't do work. (Well, really, I should have been reviewing papers, which were saved on my computer, but see above comment on not concentrating on work so well these days.) In general, all the pieces I’ve quickly written and posted have been way more enjoyed than I expected. They tend to be silly little things (ex: The Case of the Nip Slip, The Joy of Cooking, and the above-mentioned Qualifying Life Events). I have other pieces that took way more effort, but they are just as enjoyed as the short silly ones. So, I think it’s been freeing to break the association of my effort to other people’s enjoyment (which is probably a capitalistic way of looking at things, anyway).

(Aside: for some reason, the tumblr editor isn’t spell checking, which is a huge issue for me. So I had to write this elsewhere and paste it in and Tumblr was being a dick… Why is this editor so bad?)

[paradoxcase]

Hey, what’s up, guys, it’s been a long time, I know, but I am feeling the pressure of not having a place where I go to formulate my thoughts, so perhaps it’s time to dust this old tumblr off again.  I got a new, better job, I moved back to Seattle and already feel way more at home here, I’m really glad to be back.  And haha, I still have a library account here, and Walgreens actually had an extremely old address for me on file from when I lived here back in 2011-2015.  Wild.

Anyway, after thinking about it for a very long time I actually made a decision and bought Stardew Valley.  And this game is actually so fun?  Back when I first heard about it I was at the tail end of a huge farming sim kick and was like, ok, I’ve just finished playing like every other farming sim in existence, I’m pretty burned out on this now, so maybe I will take a break and not go into yet another farming sim game.  But that was a long time ago and I haven’t played a farming sim in ages, so I decided to give it a go.  And the game is so much more than a farming sim.  I wish the fishing minigame was easier, I’ll probably install a mod for that at some point, but I do want to experience as much of the content as possible one time through before I go and install a ton of mods, so I will limp along for now.  I feel like I am behind in the mines, but I did make it down to level 40 finally, which I think means I’ll start getting actual iron ore now, which will make making sprinklers easier.  I’ve almost got the greenhouse and I want to install a bunch of sprinklers and the ~100 strawberry seeds I bought at the year 2 egg festival and then never think about watering a bunch of plants ever again so I can pet all my animals and make some progress in the mines and on the damn fishing skill.  I didn’t expect to like the NPC friending part of the game, but I really like that I feel like I’m actually getting to be good friends with a bunch of them, and that’s really cool?  And I gave Sebastian a bouquet, because, as an introverted programmer I can’t tell you how thrilled I was that there was an introverted programmer character in this game, that’s just absolutely fantastic, but then I got to see his 10-heart event and my dumb romance-aversion ruined this like objectively cute scene and I’m so mad.  Like, I know for a fact that I would love this scene if it involved two characters who were both definitely not me, and I sort of anticipated this and did my best to make my farmer Not Me, she doesn’t look like me, she doesn’t have my name, but I guess she’s still Me enough that it ruined the scene for me.  So I don’t know what I want to do, at this point.  I did sort of think, I think thinking about dating a woman is significantly different than thinking about dating a man, it might just be because there’s never been a particular woman I’ve ever thought about dating so everything I think about it is very vague, but maybe the gender really does make a difference.  So I gave another bouquet to Abigail and I am going to see if her 10-heart scene makes me feel oogy too, and if it doesn’t, maybe I will marry her instead.  She was a very close second for me, anyway.  If it still makes me feel oogy, who knows.  I know there is an aromantic “marriage” option, who I haven’t actually met yet (and I have no idea how close I am to meeting him), but I do want to try a regular marriage and experience all of the content one time, just to see how it is.  I’ll probably install the platonic partnerships mod the next time I play, and probably also the multimarriage mod and then platonically marry like four people, because there are actually a lot of good options.  But I do want to see it unmodded *once*.

Incidentally, Sambastian is a Quality Ship and I’ve been reading some fanfic.  I just wish there was something I could do in the actual game to make Sebastian date Sam instead of my farmer, that would be great

#stardew valley #i don't mind being sex-averse but romance aversion is terrible #why this etc

[raphotograph33]

The Most Professional And Best Cameras For Interior Photography

I am sure you have seen some incredible pictures of beautiful interiors on different platforms and websites. What does it all take? A professional camera with all the desired settings.

Yes, a camera that suits your requirements is the best support for your business and if you are a practicing interior photography. And, being the best interior photographer, I feel it is my responsibility to help you by providing a list of my favorite cameras. 

Note: Pricing is not the factor, but your skills surely are!

So, let's kick start our reading. 

Why Do You Need The Best Cameras? 

One of the oldest artistic disciplines is interior design, but it was exceedingly challenging to record these designs and subsequently display them to the public. However,Interior design photographers in Tampa also experienced a huge surge in popularity among consumers after the invention of the camera.

Everyone finds it simpler to record and display their works.

Still, I would say one thing, none of the cameras can get the best interior design shots if you are not serious about what you do.

Does It Mean Only Costly Cameras Are Effective?

No, it can never be the case!

Both yes and no can be the answer to the question.

Any camera you use shouldn't matter when it comes to composition, experimenting with light, ideas, and subjects since it's all up to you. High-end cameras produce photographs of superior quality.  In other words, they are better at handling challenging lighting situations. Like the autofocus is better, low light performance may be rich, and can store more raw files captured.

Let's say, for example, I have a Canon 700D, which is an older model, and a Nikon D850 which are comparatively far expensive than my third camera, 700 D. I still use the 700D for wide-angle or landscape photography as I feel it would go closer to my expectations than others.

So, making a wise decision is very important, and you must consider all factors, not only the price.

Advantages Of Using Professional Cameras:

Producing higher-quality image files is the primary benefit of professional camera equipment. 

More effective dynamic range performance

Better ISO results

Larger and better sensors

Greater resolution and a bigger sensor

Additional priority areas

In my opinion, dynamic range, ISO performance, and better resolution are three of the key benefits for landscape photographers. A professional camera has significantly superior ISO performance, which is crucial for night photography.

My List Of Best 3 Cameras For Interior Photography

Canon 5D Mark IV

The camera body for this full-frame sensor offers a 30.4MP resolution and a 32,000 ISO range. Additionally, it can record 4K videos, enabling you to shoot videos that will wow your audience.

One of the most distinctive features is the ability to capture Dual Pixel Raw photos. It enables what Canon refers to as "micro-adjustments." This implies that you can slightly alter the focus point after taking the picture. 

The effect is small and does depend on the lens you're using. However, it is still a remarkable characteristic.

Nikon D850

With 46MP, this full-frame camera provides photographs with a higher resolution. The sensor itself, though, is this model's most intriguing selling point. The Nikon D850's sensor utilises innovative technology that improves light sensitivity at the sensor's edges. The quality of the peripheral vision is improved.

This translates to excellent interior photography in dim lighting, which is helpful when dealing with dimly lit home interiors! It features Wi-Fi and can produce 4K video for real estate purposes. However, you can only use Wi-Fi with Nikon's Bluetooth-enabled app.

Sony a7III

A full-frame mirrorless camera that competes with conventional full-frame DSLR versions is the Sony a7III. I advise using the Sony a7III instead of the a7 IIIR. There is a sizeable price difference without a decrease in quality.

The resolution, with the a7III delivering 24MP and the a7 IIIR having 42MP, is where there is the most noticeable difference. 

Interior design photography is the most challenging of all the professional genres of commercial photography. Every detail is critical. Every prop must be correct and in just the right location. Things must be cleaned up and simplified. Lighting can be challenging.

My Take!

I hope I am able to convince you that only getting a professional camera won't make you a great photographer immediately. It won't initially have any effect at all.

Better pictures will be taken if you have a better understanding of photography, which you can't learn in a day; it takes time and effort to become a master of these techniques.

#Interior design photography

[thelistingteammiami]

Ask Yourself These Critical Questions When Shopping for a Home Warranty

Image courtesy of Pexels

 When you purchase your first house, you quickly realize that it is more than just a home. It is an expression of your life and a future for your family. It is important to protect that investment from random unfortunate occurrences that might sting especially harshly after dedicating your hard-earned funds to buying a property. Having a home warranty can be just the thing to grant you some much-needed peace of mind, but finding the right policy requires asking yourself a few crucial questions as you begin shopping around. Read on for some pointers from The Home Owners Listing Team.

 What Do I Need My Home Warranty To Do for Me?

 The Ohio Housing Finance Agency explains that a home warranty serves to help cover hefty repair expenses if your home systems or appliances break down during the course of normal use. While the upfront cost of a warranty might seem off-putting, the amount you stand to save when something inevitably goes wrong can be a huge relief. As you’re looking for a home warranty, it’s worth remembering that your warranty provider can save you a great deal of time by quickly connecting you with one of their chosen maintenance professionals.

 If you plan to sell your home in the near future, CRES notes that it’s important to consider that having a warranty in place can actually increase the property value. You can enjoy the coverage while you continue living in the home, and the next owner can take heart in knowing that the property is likely well cared-for.

 How Much Am I Willing To Pay for the Right Policy?

 The coverage and costs that come with your warranty may depend on the type and age of the systems and appliances within your home. It is important to know how much you are willing to spend to cover your items, and you must also understand that coverage limits can impact the amount that your warranty company will spend if a covered appliance requires repair.

 Fitting the cost of a warranty into your budget can be difficult, especially after just recently purchasing a house. Experts explain that budgeting for homeowners means making sure you can still set aside savings for all the mandatory expenses that come with owning property.

 What Can I Do To Narrow Down My Options?

 Once you start researching home warranty providers in your area, you are likely to realize that there are more options than you might expect. Making the best choice entails narrowing down your options by cutting the ones that are clearly not a good fit. Check online reviews and heed word-of-mouth recommendations to get an idea of a provider's quality of service. When you have just a few solid contenders remaining, do not hesitate to request a quote from each so that you can make the most informed decision possible.

 How Can I Keep All These Important Documents Organized?

 Between buying a home and negotiating a warranty, you can quickly feel overwhelmed with documents and records that you have to organize. The best way to efficiently store your records and keep them close at hand is by digitizing your documents. After converting your paper into digital files, it’s easy for you to split PDF docs using this free tool that lets you separate large PDF documents into multiple smaller files for your convenience. That way, you’ll be able to save the file, rename it, download it, or share the new PDFs with others. 

 For a new homeowner, the idea of getting a home warranty can add extra layers of complication to an already overwhelming process. You are sure to have many questions about how best to approach the matter, but finding the right answers will put you in the best frame of mind to make the correct decision for yourself and your family.

 The Home Owners Listing Team provides everything you need to buy or sell a home in South Florida and the surrounding areas. Call 954-342-6180.

[ganymedesclock]

So I discovered the trailer for Belle (2021), and it’s making me think about what I love about Beauty and the Beast riffs, and what makes a story scratch that particular itch for me or not.

And I think a huge part of it for me is the examination of monstrosity as a social role. To just use Disney’s animated classic as my base for comparison here, Adam, The Beast, is not literally cursed with fur and fangs, claws and horns- he has those things, and may have mixed feelings about them, others certainly have bad reactions to them-

-his curse is ostracization. His curse is to not be seen as human. What actual, physical features he has are irrelevant to that. They’re just quirks he can learn to live with, or a further excuse to tell himself he deserves this isolation, this frustration, this misery.

So the breaking of the curse, to me, is not the scene where Belle sobs confirmation of what we knew well before then into his stilling chest and brings him back, minus those quirks- if anything, that his happiness comes with the loss of those things has seemed to me (and I’m not alone) as almost something of a betrayal depending on how it’s framed.

By contrast, to me, the breaking of the curse is the ballroom scene, and the moments leading up to it. Adam returns to Adam, rather than The Beast, at the point that he decides that he deserves to be treated like a human being- not as a labor of love from Belle, but from himself. Yes, it’s love with Belle that they dance together, that they have this ball scene when there’s no high society to impress, but before that point, he had to make a decision; that he can clean up and dress nice and have an evening. That he deserves to.

When we first see The Beast, he has all of the means and resources to act like a prince, to present like one. He could make himself comfortable and be surrounded by splendor, but the truest thing he suffers under is he’s ceased to see himself as worth the effort. It’s not as if he could cut the fur down and prune back his claws, file down the horns, and look the way he feels he ought to- the way he thinks he should. He’s broken every mirror in his house except for the one he hides from, and this is a gesture of absolute defeat. He knows what he looks like. He can’t pretend he doesn’t. The only way he can tolerate this is not looking at himself.

As a neurodivergent queer person, the monster in the mirror is something I have a very complicated relationship with. I have an “advantage” in some ways. My appearance is not shocking to most people. I do not benefit from an obvious mobility aid or assistive device; I speak within a range people think of is normal. I have an “unusual haircut” for a “girl” and I don’t aggressively correct people on my pronouns or presentation.

But I’ve always had this feeling, that perhaps, my fangs and fur were simply easy things to trim off, and it’s so easy to wonder, would I still be okay if they weren’t? Because really, it’s none of the granular details that make a monster. For every imagined horror creature, there’s almost certainly a real animal it resembles, and real animals are not monsters. A monster is a monster; anything else, we believe, has a place, has a home. Deserves to exist.

To be a monster is to be a thing that doesn’t fit, or, more directly, to be a monster is to be a thing that is unaccepted. Rejected for not fitting. Unworthy of love, from within, or without.

At the end of the day, I know, factually, I am not a monster. I know that I’m a real person. I know that I deserve dignity and respect and love, even if only from myself. I’m not owed another person to love me just to prove that I can be, but, also, no man is an island; as humans we seek each other one way or another, romantically or platonically. That’s a fact of anyone, not just people who struggle to see a real person when they look at their reflection.

And yet, at this same time, I can’t help but feel betrayed, left behind, when the narrative goes that if the monster does everything right its reward is to be shaped into the likeness of a Real Human Being. Because you can’t just pull a feathered skin off me and make me like I “should be”, like my various diagnoses and self-identifications all present me as an aberration from. If you showed me a me without any of those qualities, that’s honestly the thing I’m the most afraid of, a me without me. A Miss Perfect who’s a good, normative daughter, and in my insecurity I wonder if people would like her so much better than me that they wouldn’t miss if I was gone.

Which, that’s nonsense. I know a lot of people who care about me the way I am. But nobody ever said fears had to be rational.

At the end of the day, as much as I hate the idea of being a monster to others, I also relish the notion of qualities that are categorized as monsters. I love dragons. I love putting big, horrible teeth and leering eyes and wings and claws on heroic characters. Because brought into the light, qualities are just qualities. And if you bring those qualities into the favoring, soft light of stories about human connection, romances, queerplatonic bonds, friendships and found family alike, those qualities can even be charming, alluring, inspiring; a character can look like anything and we still feel a rush of reassurance that this specific character is there.

And that’s the other side of Beauty and the Beast: Adam is running away from being a monster, and Belle is trying to run away from who she is, too. Because Belle is the other side of that trap.

Let’s be honest; it isn’t just that Belle’s an outspoken woman with opinions. It’s that she’s pretty. She’s the prettiest girl in town. She’s someone people want, people have expectations for- and those expectations have little room for what she actually wants. Hell, that’s one of the major dangerous driving forces of the climax- Adam nearly gets murdered by a mob because Belle made a choice that her community really didn’t like, especially Gaston, and it’s easy to point to Adam as the wrong choice because he’s pointy.

“Beauty”, as much as “The Beast”, are dehumanizing categories that people are sorted into. The doll and the monster. One is considered beneath monstrosity; beguiling, an object of appeal and desire but not someone with opinions, oh no, and not someone able to make a choice that you disagree with. People driven to the fringes by opposing forces but regardless find each other in the place they’re trying to find room to breathe in.

And that, I think, is one way some of these riffs can, for me personally, miss the point- and that’s not a mark against them, it’s just that there’s a specific thing I see in this story, and it’s very specifically not, “to be beautiful and desirable to mass public consumption is the way to be happy; we will have a story about how to rehabilitate someone so they can be beautiful too” but rather, “what does it mean when people stop seeing you as yourself, whether the alternative is perfection or a monster? what would you do to be seen clearly?”

#writing ruminations #beauty and the beast #readmore

[fangirlsmood]

Tomioka Giyuu x reader - inferiority complex

Summary : Noticing how Giyuu doesn't know his own worth, you try to remedy his inferiority complex.

Warnings : Spoilers about Giyuu’s past.

author notes : Seeing our little Giyuu blame and put himself down breaks my heart, it's time for someone to comfort him and tell him what an amazing person he is.

_ Tomioka-san ! 

Hearing your voice, Giyuu stopped in his walk and turned to you, nodding his head to greet you. You noticed that he was holding a bunch of papers, probably a mission report he had to return to Oyakata-sama.

_ You’re already back ! After filing your report, would you accept ...

_ No.

_ But...

You've been begging him for a while to train you. He had saved you a few months ago from a demon and since then you had only one wish: to become like him. You were infinitely grateful to him and you were so admiring. Not really knowing how to fight but wanting to be useful you had started to help at the Butturfly estate. However you wanted to do more, you wanted to save people before they could get hurt like Giyuu had done for you.

_ Ask another person.

_ Kocho-san is already taking care of Kanao, Rengoku of his little brother ... Everyone else is too busy to spend time with me. I want you to train me... please.

He looked you straight in the eye for a moment then sighed, unable to resist your perseverence :

_ Fine. I will train you but don't expect me to be a good teacher.

Since that day Giyuu trained you every time he return from a mission. You couldn't be happier. The training was difficult, tiring and sometimes painful but for you it was an honor. Even if he didn’t said it Giyuu was proud to see your progress. Besides, it was nice for him to have company. 

•••••••••••

One day, at the end of a hashira meeting, Rengoku came to approach him.

_ Tomioka ! We don't see much anymore (Y/n) at the Butterfly estate. I heard that you train her.

 He nodded, Rengoku let out one of his loud laughs :

_ It's surprising ! I had offered to train her but she had refused. Is she doing well?

_ She’s not bad.

It was surprising indeed. You told him that no one was available to train you and he learned it was a lie. Why had you been lying to him? He didn't understand what you could gain from it.

••••••••••

That night he found you serving dinner for both of you like you did almost every day since you had become his student. 

_ Welcome home ! How was the meeting ?

_ Good.

His gaze immediately made you uncomfortable. Usually he always gave you a warm look, while now he was looking at you coldly, as if he had difficulty recognizing you. He took a seat in front of you and began to eat. After a heavy silence which weighed on him as well as on you, he decided to speak :

_ Why did you lie to me ?

You did not remember having committed such an act against him. Seeing your confused stare he developed his point :

_ Rengoku told me he offered to train you. Why did you tell me that no one has time for you ?

You didn't think he would find out someday. Nothing in his attitude or his voice let show anger but you knew he was necessarily upset. Giyuu was a man of his word and honor, for him a lie was a lack of respect. You were terribly ashamed, however, you manage to stammer an explanation :

_ Oh ! It’s not what you think ! In fact it is but... I mean I didn’t really thought about it... Believe me it was far from my intentions to disrespect you, I would have never offended you on purpose ! I just... I just wanted to be trained by you.

_ Rengoku is a really good and strong man. You should have accepted his proposal. 

He marked a pause.

_ Go back to him, if you ask him I think his offer still stands.

Was Giyuu denying you? Did he no longer want you as a student? He got up and turned his back to you as if to end this discussion but you got up in turn, you wanted to stay by his side: 

_ I don’t want anyone else to train me ! 

_ It would be better for you.  He will be able to take care of you and make you evolve. 

Suddenly you realized what was going on. Giyuu thought Rengoku was a better hashira than him. Didn't he know how strong he was too? You stood in front of him so you could look him in the eye, so he would know you weren't lying :

_ You’re strong too. And you’re a good professor. 

_ You don’t know what you’re talking about. I am stronger than you that’s all. 

_ You’re a hashira ! You’re one of the strongest !

He lowered his head you saw in his eyes, him who was usually so impassive, a hint of sadness.

_ I don't deserve this title. I shouldn't be there.

_ What do you mean ? 

You noticed that his hands tightened on his haori.The words struggled out of his throat, as if part of him wanted to hold them back while another wanted to get them out :

_  Those who owned the two parts of this haorie should be there, they should be alive. Them, not me.

It was the first time Giyuu had talked about his past. You kept silent, you didn't want to rush him. You just wanted to understand him, reassure him, make him feel surrounded. 

_ (Y/n)... I know you admire me and it's nice to have someone so dedicated by my side but you don't know everything. You idealize me. I am not a strong. I am not a good person.

One of his hand clenched the red part of his haorie :

_ I wasn’t strong enough to protect my sister...

His other hand clenched on the other part :

_ I shouldn't have passed the Demon Slayer exam ... Sabito should have, he was much stronger, much better in everything, but he protected me and it cost him his life.

You were speechless. Knowing that Giyuu, who was so generous, strong and usually impassive, had suffered so much broke your heart. You wanted to cry for him but you knew it would only cause drama. You will cry another day, now you needed to cheer up your beloved master.

_ Rengoku will know how to protect you, you will be safe with him. 

••••••••••

The next morning Giyuu couldn't find you anywhere. He assumed you had chosen to join Rengoku. He was sure it was the best option and it suited him for the moment. He felt ridiculous for confiding in you last night, and was too embarrassed to see you again. Nevertheless he had become so used to your presence that he already missed you. Part of him regretted telling you to leave. 

Fortunately you came back little less than a month after your departure and with a surprise. You ran to him yelling a "tomioka-san" as a greeting before handing him a package. A little taken aback he examined it for a moment. Impatient you pressed him a little : 

_   It's a gift for you! Open it !

He followed your instructions and found a nice little bundle of papers taht were of different sizes and different colors. The writings and the ink used were also diverse. You started to explain nervously :

_ I wanted you to know how amazing you are, so I asked the hashira, your old master and a few of the people you saved to write down what they liked about you or what you had did good for them ... Oyakata-sama and Gyomei-san could’nt write but they dictated to me and I transcribed everything ... I didn't think it would take so long to contact everyone, sorry ... 

He had already started to read. Everyone had written something even Obanai, Sanemi and Shinobu had found a few nice things to say. Shinobu had recounted a mission accomplished with Giyuu and admitted that without him it would have been a failure while Obanai and Sanemi were content to write a single sentence where they said that Giyuu was not "that bad" and that "some of these techniques were quite impressive". Urokodaki gently reprimand him so that he would stop always blaming himself and telling him that he was proud of him. 

And finally there was your letter. It was the longest and as he read it he wanted to cry with joy. He wondered what he had done to deserve so much praise, he wanted to deny all these compliments but you had written a real reasoning full of examples to support your words that he was obliged to recognize his qualities. 

He felt his heart melt. it must have taken so much effort from you to collect all these little words, it was a real treasure that you had just offered him. You watched him silently in his reading which lasted a long time and since he didn't say anything you wondered if it was really a good idea :

_ Erm... Do you like it ? It's okay if you don't, but keep them anyway. That way you could always reread them when you needed to ... you know ... know how amazing you are.

A smile covered his face and you noticed that his eyes were bright like a child who discovers the world. His smile was so faint you might not have noticed though it was the sweetest you've ever seen. 

_ Thank you. It's the nicest thing anyone's done for me. It must have taken a lot of effort from you to convince Obanai, Sanemi and Kocho and put it all together.

_ You deserve all the effort in the world.

You gave him a huge smile and he believed you. He felt all the weight he had on his heart, all his guilt shut up in the face of all these kind words. For the first time Giyuu told himself not only that he was lucky to have you by his side but also that he deserved to be happy. Every time he read one of the letters he said to himself, although it was still hard for him not to doubt it, that he was worthy. More than feeling worthy, he felt loved.

••••••••••

Navigation

#giyuu tomioka #tomioka giyuu #giyuu tomioka imagine #tomioka giyuu imagine #giyuu tomioka x reader #tomioka giyuu x reader #tomioka x reader #giyuu x reader #tomioka giyuu x reader fluff #giyuu x reader fluff #tomioka x reader fluff #tomioka giyuu one-shots #giyuu one-shots #kymetsu no yaiba fluff #kimetsu no yaiba scenarios #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba one-shot #kimetsu no yaiba x reader fluff #demon slayer x reader #kymetsu no yaiba scenario #kny x reader #kny imagines #kny one-shot

[xo-cuteplosion-xo]

Hi hi again can i get scenario where dazai has a calm and polite s/o and they bump into chuuya, when chuuya finds out that they are his s/o he asks them why do they like him. s/o talks about he's so good to her and everything about dazai without knowing that dazai was listening the whole time and u know just some fluff please :)) thank you

Honey |Dazai x Calm/polite Reader|

Today’s sunset was extraordinarily beautiful. Maybe, it was the nice moment that you and your boyfriend were finally spending. The past weeks had been built with stressful turns and boorish circles. Tonight marked the end of such things. The red of the sunset fading as you step into the bar. It was normal for you to arrive early but for Dazai to get there moments before the clock turned to mark him late. Hanging your jacket up you walked over to the bar. Taking a seat you ordered the usual two drinks for you and Dazai. Thinking about it now this was a weird place for a date, though on another hand it wasn’t. He does often find himself at bars while you're off doing things. It’s a habit of his, but usually, it’s the Lupin he recommends. You had never been here before. 

Deciding to down a drink or two while you waited, you struck a conversation up with the person working tonight's shift. You were always quite polite, if they asked you to shut up you would have. They never said such things though. How could they when you smiled so polite, flashing a brightness to their day. You even politely held yourself. The chime of the door opening caused you to politely bow your head before looking over to see who it was. Expecting it to be Dazai who was already just over a minute late you were shocked to see a different male. Without sighing or showing anything but a calm polite expression, you turned and faced back to the bar to further the conversation.

Asking for another drink you smiled sweetly, taking small sips as to not chug the drink. Looking at the clock you became slightly worried, it wasn’t unknown Dazai tended to be late to such meetings, but it was abnormal for him to be late to one of your dates. Especially since there is hardly ever time to spend much alone time together. “Waiting on somebody?” the ginger beside you asked as he ordered a glass of wine. Swishing it in his hand you made the connection. 

Politely you nodded your head. Despite how you disapproved of the mafia executive you never showed anything but a clam polite expression. “I am, is there a reason a mafioso like yourself is interested?” you looked to him, keeping the polite tone to your voice.

Chuuya merely shrugged, leaning back to swallow his glass in one go. “Didn’t think you drank.” he shrugged, watching you shrug and turn back to your drink. Taking another sip you shivered already feeling light in the head.

Deciding to give the small male a reply, you set the glass back down, letting the ice clink lightly against the glass in the silence. “Well, I don’t normally drink, but dates do tend to wind up in quick places like this.” shrugging once again you lifted the glass to your lips again.

Chuuya may be a ball of fire ready to explode at any given moment, but he wasn’t an idiot, not a big one at least. It was a given that based on being here your date had to be somebody who didn’t mind places located in the middle of conflicts. Neither mafia territory nor safe, this bar was one of many who served cops, gangs, mafioso's, and even detectives. It had no obligation, so spilling information was never a problem. The only thing silencing them from spilling anything they heard, would be fear. If he had to make a wild guess, it would be somebody you worked close to, somebody with enough risk to end up in a place like this. Nearly spitting the drops of wine in his mouth from his lips, he swallowed coughing lightly. “Don’t tell me, somebody like you, a huge pushover, with Dazai?” 

Turning to him, you tilted your head before shaking it lightly with disapproval. “First, it would be appreciated if you could be a bit polite. I’m not a pushover. I'm simply collected and know how to act respectfully, even to those who I don't agree with, such as you.” you paused to finish your glass and ask for another refill. Time had passed quickly, and you noticed Dazai was now four minutes late. “Second, Dazai and I are none of your business, Mr. Nakahara-san.” 

It bothered him how weirdly respectful you were. Since everybody called him Chuuya, it was weird that he could never get you to use the first name. No matter how many times he screamed at you to just call him Chuuya. “Why do you even like him? He’s a suicidal maniac with no sense of loyalty.” 

Sighing you looked to the ceiling, taking yet another sip of the drink you’d ordered. “Why? That’s easy, he’s cold at first but underneath he’s kind. He’s closed off but if you can break into the shell there is so much there. He’s good-looking, strong, protective. He knows how to respect boundaries. He’s actually rather loyal when he wants to be. He goes to great lengths to protect the ones he cares about. His jokes can be cringe and dark, but they make me smile. Then, the suicidal part, he’s genuinely depressed, but it’s alright because I’m there for him now. He’s there for me when I break down, so I support him on bad days. He’s an amazing person once you get past all the walls.” there was a slight blush to your cheeks as you spoke.

Despite having so many more praises to say, hands hung over your shoulders. A pair of lips reaching to your ear. “Do say more~” it wasn’t meant to be seductive, more, a playful tease.

Turning red you turned to face the brunette you had been talking on and on about. His glimmering eyes looking to yours as he stood up straight. Chuuya was up and gone in moments. “I don’t have the energy to deal with you today.” Dazai didn’t pay him any mind. Taking the seat next to you with a smile.

“Sorry for being so late! I got held back at the office. Stupid Kunikida and his determination to get me to file reports.” pouting as he took a sip of the drink laid before him, you snickered. Moving to mess with his hair you moved past the initial embarrassment.

“Maybe if you did some of it, he'd be less grumpy all the time! A-also, how long were you there?” you mumbled, once more becoming embarrassed as you thought about him overheating all the things you said about him.

One of his deadly, overconfident, and almost sadistic smirks crossed his lips. “I was there the entire time~” he purred, leaning to kiss your cheek with his lips.

Huffing in embarrassment it was your turn to pout. “You could have come up to me and said hi when you walked in.”

He merely snickered, messing your hair up as he shrugged. “But it was so entertaining and heart-warming to hear you say such nice things about me!” he’d never say it, but his heart had paced a million miles and his cheeks had become roses themselves. He’d never received compliments or praise like that before. 

The two of you spent the rest of the night exchanging laughs and pestering one another. Embarrassing the other in any given chance before leaving the bar to spend some cuddles and quality time together at your apartment.

#bsd #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs #dazai #dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai x y/n #dazai fluff #dazai x reader fluff #dazai x you fluff #dazai x y/n fluff #bsd fluff #bsd x reader fluff #bungo stray dogs fluff #fluffy dazai #dazai scenario #dazai x reader scenerio

[elphiej]

Be My Light - Chapter 4:   The Mad Leader

*Genre: Mafia, angst, eventual smut, slow burn

*Warnings: References to violence, minor assault, 

Author’s note: First off, I’d like to send a special Thank You to someone who was a huge inspiration to me and to this story. This is the chapter that really started it all and I was inspired by @bangtan-sonyeonddaeng  ‘s mafia reaction series. She is a fantastic person and was one of the first people I showed this Be My Light to when I was too scared to post it. She is a beautiful soul and wonderful writer. Thank you for the push. 

Another Big thanks to my editor for sticking with me all this time and into the future. And, of course, to all the people who are reading, commenting, and reblogging this. I can’t tell you all how much is means to me. Thank you all and I hope you enjoy this next installment of Be My Light. (P.S. I have a thing for RM in a long trench coat.)

Tag list:  @lolalalooo @bangtan-sonyeonddaeng, @barbikatherine , @mrsfortune1306 , @lovesick-heart0 , @iamnamjoonsbxtch , @deathkat657 , @deeepvibes , @sugamonster22 , @weiinihao, @hemmofluke , @rainbow-zebra-unicorns , @joyfullyobsessed , @elvencantation , 

                                   Chapter 4: The Mad Leader

              You stared at the cell phone clutched in your hand, your mind spinning with so many questions. Who were those people? Why did talking to this ‘RM’ make you feel like something bad was coming? With that deep, serious tone, were they just as dangerous as the man with the cane? And what kind of normal person calls themselves ‘RM’? Agust was already on the edge of interesting and odd as it was. Scanning over the still lit screen, you wondered what other names were in the contact list. Other than ‘God of Destruction’, the last few calls you could see without going through the device belonged to ‘Mochi’, ‘My Favorite’, and ‘Worldwide Pain in my Ass’. Based on those names, you couldn’t begin to imagine who was gonna match those names.

               It was safe to assume that this RM guy was concerned about the man in the suit trying to finish the job. The hospital had a good security team but you thought it best to talk to Doctor- Henry- to see if more could be done. Your hand paused as it went to put the cell phone back with Agust’s things; if RM or any of the odd named voices tried to contact you for an update, they would most likely call that, instead of trying to navigate the hospital switch board. Figuring it was the best option, you placed the phone safely in your scrub’s pocket as you moved to the bedside for one last check on the patient. Agust hadn’t moved again since right before the phone call and was still as could be. The monitors were all reading normally. There was a blood transfusion line in his arm to help replace what he had lost, along with another IV pushing fluids and medication. You adjusted his arm to make it more comfortable for him once he woke up.

               “I’ll be back to check on you as soon as I can,” you said as you fixed his blankets. “Please, try not to do anything until I get back.”

               You slipped out of the room and pulled the door shut behind you. There was an anxious feeling that crept back into your gut, the same one you felt when you had first heard the gun shots ring out from the silence of the construction site. Your mind had so many thoughts and scenarios running through it that you felt overwhelmed. Things like, ‘what if the man with the cane and rough voice came here? Would he shoot his way through the floors until he found Agust? Were you really as safe as you hoped?’ The hospital had been under a few threats but nothing had ever come from those except words. It would be best to stay as cautious as possible. You had too many friends and patients to not take your feelings seriously.

               As you made your way towards your station, you were surprised to see that Henry was already there leaning over the desk with the phone pressed up against his ear. He pulled a pad of paper from the other side of the desk and started scribbling something down as he nodded and spoke in a low tone to whomever was on the other end. That saves me from having to page him, you mused. Henry did a double take towards you when he noticed you out of the corner of his eye. He beaconed you over with an urgent wave of his hand. The calm yet awkward demeanor from earlier had been replaced with a more serious one. Once you were within an arm’s reach of him, he reassured whomever he was talking to that ‘everything will be taken care of’ and hung up.

               “Good,” he said, placing a hand on your shoulder, “I need you to help me.”

               “Henry, about that John Doe patient. I was able to talk to someone close to him. I think we may need to alert the security team about- “

               “I’ve already talked to them. The hospital is going on alert for any suspicious activity entering the hospital. And we are actually moving the patient to one of the private units upstairs. I just got off the phone with the director and we’ve got everything worked out for you so you’ll be safe,” he said over his shoulder as he started walking down the hall.

               “Wait, what does that mean? What do you mean by worked everything out?” You took extra long steps to keep up with his brisk pace.

               “The same person who demanded higher security for that patient requested that you be kept with him as his private staff until otherwise. Which means you’ll be in the secure ward with him in case anything happens. It’s gonna be for the best. You were the first one with him and it’s gonna be more comfortable if he doesn’t have to get acclimated to someone else after all this. Don’t worry, we’ve got it worked out with Jax already.”

               Henry led you back into Agust’s room and made fast work of disconnecting him from the machines that surrounded him. He pulled the IV bags down and placed them on the bed by the still form. Meanwhile, you were frozen at the end of the bed, feeling dizzy from how fast he seemed to expect you to understand what was happening. This wasn’t the first gang related case you had been assigned to since starting at Mercy, nor was it the first gunshot case; why did this sudden change to the routine make you feel ever more nervous? Never had you moved a patient into a secure wing designed from more severe or quarantined patients before just because someone had requested it. Henry called your name to shake you from your thoughts and motioned you to move to the side of the bed as he unlocked the wheels of the gurney and pushed the bed from the wall. As you helped guide it from the room, you couldn’t help but feel the tension grow.

               “So, I am just supposed to stay locked up in some room like a prisoner? And be someone’s private nurse? What about the rest of my patients here? I can’t just leave Amber to tend to them all alone. We are short staffed as it is,” you mentioned as you navigated everyone into the elevator at the end of the hall.

               Henry hit a button and the elevator started to move. He leaned close to look you in the face, his eyes filled with seriousness. “Listen, Y/N, I know this is strange but you just have to trust me. I don’t know all the details but someone particularly important has to be involved to make the director so quick to comply with whatever they asked. But no matter what, your safety is my priority, maybe a bit more than my patients. I’m sure the director thinks that too. Whoever it is must just want to make sure this guy has the best care possible. And when he gets here, he’ll probably want to hear from you what happened. And if whatever gang did this does try anything, I don’t want you to worry because no one is going to get to him or you. Only the director, you, and I will have access to this room or know where he is. Apparently, the man the director talked to said he would have a way to get a hold of you and prove his identity to gain access. I know how you are, Y/N, you are a great person. That’s why you’re so good at what you do. But don’t think that you are inconveniencing anyone; Jax has already rearranged everything and made some calls. I really need you to think about yourself now. And what is best is for you is to do what I am asking and not over think this right now.”

               Henry was being so sincere that you couldn’t find the voice to make any arguments. You gave him a weak nod and tried to take what he said to heart. As Amber had pointed out before, one of your qualities was that you put others well before yourself. Hence, why you were in this predicament. As the doors opened onto the new floor, you promised him that you would try.

               The door opened onto a floor where the more severe, long term patients were kept. This floor could, also, be used for quarantining or the more delicate of patients. At the moment, you knew it had only a few occupants: a coma patient, a patient suffering from extreme burns, and someone from the psych ward that needed more focused attention. To enter this ward, you needed a key card, making this more isolated than your full and frantic floor. Henry commented there was no record that Agust had been moved in any of the files. And if anyone tried to look him up, it would be like he never existed. The person who had called to make all this happen had said he’d contact you and that he and his colleagues were to say they were here to perform community service if asked by anyone else. Apparently, they deemed it as security protection. Henry had you swipe your ID to gain access to the floor and you made your way down the silent hall to the vacant room Henry had staked out for you to stay in. The room was bigger than the one you were used to on your floor. There was a small couch across from where the bed was to go, a private bath off near the entrance, and even a TV in the corner. There was, also, a small recliner near where the head of the gurney was to rest. You imagined you’d be there most of the time. Henry helped you set everything back up in the room and did a quick check on the patient after he was secured in his new residence.

               “Hopefully, he’s gonna wake up a bit soon. He’s reacting well to what I’m doing,” Henry commented as he checked Agust’s pupils constrict as he shined his pen light in them. He gave some instructions about his IV and transfusion processes. He gave you a quick run down of the floor in case you needed anything. “Until he wakes up, I guess feel free to do whatever in here. It can be like a mini vacation. You know, if you ignore all the weird stuff happening. You can watch some TV or order some food. The mysterious man said to spare no expense when it came to our patient or you. I promise by Friday this will be all over and we can go out and talk about nicer things. Okay?”

               Before you could stop yourself, you felt your cheeks get hot and you turned your eyes to the floor. This was not the best place for this, but you knew Henry did it to only ease the anxiety you were feeling. He was almost too perfect. Henry promised to check in once he had finished his rounds as he left from the room and pulled the door shut behind him. You heard the security lock click into place, knowing it would only open from the inside or if you had an ID card. You allowed yourself to drop into the recliner, allowing everything to wash over you. Paranoia was thick in the air as you tried to make sense of everything. Henry was right; whoever these people were they must just want to talk to you and this was easier than scouting the halls. But the thought did very little to chase the nervousness away. Your hands started to rub together out of tension, squeezing your fingers, cracking your knuckles one by one with your thumbs. You took a few deep breaths as you tried to force yourself out of the impending panic. Your eyes looked over at the bed. You tried to remind yourself that you needed to keep it together and be strong for him. Then your eyes landed on his hand. You remembered when you were hiding behind the counter when the man with the cane was getting closer and closer. And when Agust had reached over and squeezed your hand. In that moment, he gave you reassurance with such a small gesture, not thinking of himself. You remembered how genuine it felt. It’d be nice if you could do that now, you thought with a weak smile.

               Instead, you settled for forcing yourself to think of something else. You read through his charts, tapped through some news on your phone, and tried to people watch out the window behind the couch. The afternoon sun had started making its way towards the horizon; how quickly the day had ended up flying by. You had decided against turning on the television for now, thinking how awkward it would be for him to wake up to you watching some trash TV show. You tried walking around the room to get a sense of where you’d be staying for the foreseeable future. But all of that only killed twenty minutes and you were still stir-crazy. There wasn’t much you could do for Agust at the moment, except allow him to rest without you trying to hold his hand or anything else.

               Suddenly, there was a buzzing in your pocket; it was Agust’s phone. You were a bit ashamed at how quickly you reached for it. There was a new text message. It was from a new named contact: Sunshine. The preview of the message said, ‘To Miss Nurse’, making your assumption that the people on the other end would have expected you to keep the phone on you correct. And since it was addressed to you, you didn’t feel too bad about opening the phone again. You swiped open the text and tried not to scroll anywhere higher into their previous chats.

-          Sunshine: To Miss Nurse. if you see this, please take good care of our Hyung. And if he gives you any trouble, tell him I said to behave. RM should be almost there. He tends to speed.  

               There were a couple silly emojis next to it that made you smile. Surely, they can’t be bad people if this is how they communicate. They must be close friends. Though, you still wondered how they had gotten the director to do all this. Maybe there was someone else doing all of this? You shook your head and typed a quick message back, so not to have them worry.

-          I’ll take good care of him. That’s my job.

You really hoped Agust didn’t mind you messing with his phone. Though, you figured it was better to ask for forgiveness than permission in this scenario. There was no response which made you think that it was all he needed at the time. Gazing at the clock on the phone, you had wasted thirty minutes in the room so far. You thought of your backpack in the locker room a few floors down and some of your things at your stations that you could pass the time with. Since Agust was secure here, you thought it may be a good idea to gather some things to help you waste time until this RM shows up. It was unlikely that Agust was going to wake up yet, and you could be fast so he wouldn’t be alone for long. You slipped the phone back into your pocket and rose from the chair, heading for the door. You cast one more look at the still figure in the bed before dimming the lights and pulled the door shut behind you.

               You set off at a brisk pace for the elevator and took it down a few levels to where the staff locker room was kept. You raced in, pulled your bag from your locker, and left before anyone noticed you. You were sure since the director had put the whole hospital on alert that everyone was making rounds to keep eyes everywhere. You hoped grabbing your stuff from your station was just as easy; you weren’t sure about how to explain why you had suddenly deserted your station. Amber wasn’t there but you could hear her and Jax talking loudly from a back room. You wanted to talk to your best friend, to help ease some nerves and have her tell you exactly what you needed to hear. But you didn’t want to wait around or take her away from her new workload. You pulled open the drawer where you kept some personal items, incase of slower work days, and shoved them into your bag. You froze when your fingers hit against something that you knew, instantly, should not be in your bag. Peering into the opening, your eyes locked onto a metallic, black, studded object that you had seen earlier that morning.  

              The gun Agust had placed in your hand.

             How did that get in there? You didn’t remember grabbing it unless it had happened in the chaos of the EMTs and police rushing to assess the situation. Well, if you weren’t already anxious, this just made it worse. Let’s just add this to the ever-growing list of stupid things I’ve done today, you berated yourself. You brought a potentially loaded gun into a hospital. You needed to get back up to the room and get this out of your possession. Maybe when this RM got there, he could take it from you. You pulled the bag shut and slugged it over your shoulder, trying hard not to think about it.

            You moved away from the desk and down the hall towards the elevator. But as you stepped into the silent hall with all the doors closed, one was not closed as it had been when you left; the room where Agust had been. And there was someone looking inside. There was a man, tall and stocky, and dressed in a simple navy uniform. He wasn’t a part of the hospital staff and you didn’t think he was there to clean the room with the lights still off. Trying to stay as unnoticed as you could, you took longer strides towards the end. As you passed behind him, you peered beyond him into the pitch blackness of the room to just make out another figure lurking there. He wasn’t dressed in the same way as the man in the door. He was in darker colors that you couldn’t make out and wore what looked like a fedora on his head. What caught your attention as you passed, was the small peek of icy, blue hairs that were just visible on the side. A deep grumble that sounded from the room made your breath catch in your throat, and made you stop in your tracks. It sounded so familiar to the sadistic voice from this morning. The man with the cane had gotten into the hospital?! How, they upped security measures, hadn’t they? Maybe it was your imagination playing with you with all the stress. Not wanting to stick around to figure out if you were right, you tried to get away before they had noticed you.

            But, sadly, you weren’t that lucky.

           “Excuse me, nurse. Perhaps you can help me.”

           You felt your whole body stiffen as the voice was all to clearly the one that had stalked you from beyond the counter. The voice that dripped with crazed malice and venom as he called out for Agust, that had taunted and tried to lure him out. The voice that you were sure would haunt your dreams. It was the man with the cane, though he didn’t have it now. As you turned, he looked nothing like the half-crazed man yelling and destroying things around him. He looked almost normal, save for the fake smile he had plastered across his lips. He was no longer dressed in the light blue suit and fur coat you had caught a glimpse behind the counter, but in a simple dark blazer and trousers. The man who lingered in the doorway had come to stand next to him as they walked up to you, dressed in a police uniform. His uniform cap was pulled low to obscure his face, though you could see bruising and swelling through the shadows. Both of them gave a slight bow to you.

           “Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Inspector Taop, this is officer Chen. We are here following up on a patient that was supposed to be brought here. I’ve been looking everywhere, but no one has an answer for me whether he is here or not. And I haven’t seen a single worker on this floor.”

           He had never seen you at the scene so you knew he didn’t recognize you, or could see that you didn’t believe anything that was coming out of his mouth. That would help you, you decided. You took a deep breath and tried to hide the fear and nervousness. Just act normal. Try to stall until someone comes around.

           “Sorry, officer, we’re a bit understaffed as it is. What can I help you with?”

           “I’m looking for a patient that was brought here. Gunshot victim, a young man, brought in this morning?”

           “Can you be a bit more specific? We are a hospital. Do you know how many young men we have come in here with some kind of bullet wound? I had six this month.”

           You saw the smile slip and irritation rise in those cold eyes. He cleared his throat, trying to hold on to his polite composure. “This one would have come in this morning. There was a shooting downtown. He would have had multiple gunshot wounds. One nurse said he was brought in by ambulance this morning, but then another said that they found no record of him. And the last person I talked to sent me here. Please, this is very important.”

           “Can I see your badge, sir?” He looked completely off guard by the question. You, also, seemed confused. It had just jumped out of your mouth before you realized it. But it seemed like the right thing to ask. You continued, “There’s been a threat made to the hospital, you see, and I need to make sure that everything is in order. I would get in trouble if I gave such information about any patient to an imposter.”

           You could see the wheels in his head turning. But you didn’t expect him to nod his head, understandingly, and reach into his pocket to hand you a leather, bifold wallet. Was this psycho really a police officer? How could someone so vile be in law enforcement? You thought back to what little memories of your father that you had lingering in the back of your mind and couldn’t begin to imagine him doing anything like what this man had done, no matter how bad of a criminal they were. Before you could think, your body seemed to act on it’s own again and opened the wallet and your eyes started to dance across the metal shield. You weren’t entirely sure what you were looking for at first. Until your eyes caught it and something clicked in your mind. It was a fake, but an exceptionally good fake. Anyone else would have just taken it at face value but something in your mind flashed and screamed that this was a fake like the smile still on the ‘inspector’s’ face. In the reaches of your memory, you remembered running your fingers over your father’s badge, memorizing every detail. And you still did that when you were stressed out; you still had his badge and it was currently in the front pocket of your bag. And you seemed to recall your father teaching you how to identify a real badge from others.

           A sudden anger took hold of you that seemed to spur on some brave part of you. You closed the wallet and handed it back to him, keeping your face neutral to hide that you were even more sure of his act. Maybe it was the dishonor to officers like your father, or that he was trying to get to the boy you had risked a lot to save. And your hard work was not going to waste. “I’m sorry officer. But like I said, we have a few patients that could fit your description. None on this floor at all. And if the other nurses said they have no record of him, I’m not sure what I can do for you. Besides that, if we did have a patient come in with multiple gunshot wounds, I imagine that they’d need extensive surgery and wouldn’t be conscious to answer any questions you could have. And with no guardian to act in their place until they are awake to consent to a line of questioning about a traumatic experience, I can’t let you go any further. You should know that, Officer.”

           The smile was wiped from the man’s face. The uniformed man’s eyes got wide at your declaration and they shifted towards his leader in panic. Taop, or whatever his real name was, straightened up and took a step towards you. He towered over you and the energy radiating from him would have intimidated you into submission. Just like with your ex. But you needed to protect Agust. In any case, all you needed to do was scream and someone would be alerted. There wasn’t much this asshole could accomplish without being found out. But he continued to advance until he backed you up against the wall. Even still, you never broke eye contact with him.

           “I don’t think you understand the situation of this, little girl,” he said, rage tittering on the edge of his voice. “There are some really dangerous people and it would be a shame if you got caught in the crossfires. It’s in your best interest to answer my questions and tell me what I need to know.”

           “Then bring a warrant,” you challenged.

           His hand collided with the wall next to your head, making you jump. His face was so close to yours now, and there was the crazed man you remembered from this morning. Your heart was in your ears. He, suddenly, took a deep inhale then another before tilting his head to the side. “What a brave little girl. Tell me, where were you this morning? Something tells me you may be exactly who I need to talk to.”

           “Hey, back off her!”

           Both you and the man turned to look down the hall towards the elevator towards the source of the deep voice that had interrupted the line of questioning. The doors of the elevator were opened and from them stepped a young man with platinum white hair. His eyes were haunting and strong, like a dragon woken from his peace. He was exceptionally tall, taking long strides towards the scene. You couldn’t help but let your eyes take in the man who was coming to your rescue. Dressed in a dark trouser and a white buttoned up shirt gave him a classic handsomeness, and a long black coat with a hood drawn up that accentuated his height. As he approached, he slid the hood down and swiped his hand up to push the stray white hairs from his face. If you weren’t terrified, you would have appreciated how handsome he was. You glanced back at the man caging you; his body tensed as the newcomer walked up but his face never showed.

           He let out a sigh and a small smile reappeared, but it was not the same he had tried to charm you with. It was one of arrogance.  “Ah, Mr. Kim,” the inspector said, not moving from his position, “how nice of you to drop in.”

          “You’ve got some nerve,” the handsome newcomer said, his tone low and smooth. 

          “What for? Being too formal? Do you not like me using your surname? I’m not sure which name you prefer now; you change names so often, it’s hard to keep up after all this time.”

          “You’re one to talk. What name are you going by now, officer? Here to investigate a fraud? Or are you here to put yourself into more trouble?”

          “Such a negative attitude. Officer Chen and I are here on official business,” the detective flashed his badge at the so named Mr. Kim. “And this nice young lady was willing to help me out with some information. Isn’t that right, Little Girl?”

          “It sure doesn’t look that way coming from the elevator. I think you need to take a step back,” Mr. Kim ordered with a strong but suggestive tone that made you question what kind of power someone as young looking as him could possess.

          The fake detective made no sign that he was planning on heeding the newcomer’s words to move from your personal space. His eyes shifted from Mr. Kim back to you. His stare bore into you sharper than claws and made your breath catch. You weren’t sure if he was trying to scare you into agreeing with him or just threaten you. But Mr. Kim was having none of that; he gave the older man’s shoulder a hard shove and wedged himself in the space between you to keep you away from the other man. Mr. Kim reached a hand behind him and placed it on your arm, to keep you secure behind him and to give you some reassurance that he was not going to hurt you. You couldn’t help yourself, as you fisted your hands into the back of his coat and peered around his massive frame.

          “You always have to play savior, don’t you Rapmon?” The way he had said the name made it seem like he was trying to strike a nerve in Mr. Kim. But the other man gave no sign that he was bothered. “You make it seem like I was doing something unseemly to her. You and your broken boy scouts always turn things difficult. Speaking of, where are the others? Maybe they could answer some questions for me. There’s one in particular I’m interested in seeing. I’m checking up on a victim from a shooting downtown. Just making sure he’s doing alright.”

          “You’re really committed to this bit, aren’t you Choi? Oh, sorry- what name are you going by today? It’s so hard to keep track, isn’t that what you said?” Mr. Kim tilted his head to the side, eyes twinkling with a mischievous shine.

          “What a nuisance you are. I’m just trying to get information to make sure things go well. Though come to think of it, your boys may not know much. Word was that the victim was all alone. Left all by themselves, bleeding and hurt in such a dangerous situation. What kind of friends would let someone knowingly go into that situation alone? Now, I’d really like to finish my conversation with the little lady, Rapmon.” When Choi, as you figured his name actually was, took a step towards you, Mr. Kim moved the both of you to keep you behind him and further away from the other. “Well, since you seem hellbent on keeping me from doing something so simple, I could always ask you. Though to be honest, your being here may have answered my questions.”

          “My being here answers nothing,” Mr. Kim challenged. “Unlike you, I am here to do good for the community. And it’s a good thing I came by when I did. You’re already on thin ice after all the trouble you’ve caused. Imagine what would happen if you caused any problems while on Hallowed Ground. If you were to hurt anyone staying or working here, you would have more than my family looking for you. The rest of the Families would be looking to teach you a lesson. Imagine what most of them will think when they hear about the deceit you pulled this morning. After what I witnessed, you can be sure I’ll have eyes monitoring this place. You will not go against the Accords.”

          “Don’t you lecture me about the Accords, you psycho. I’ve been around just as long as they have and lived them. I taught them to you.”

          “And yet, you only follow them when they suit you. Just like your leader and his before him. But things are different now. They are gone, and your hold is slipping. I have enough pull now to ensure Accords are followed. And if you want to make a further spectacle of yourself, I’ll gladly show you I’m not that kid anymore that you ordered around. You saw what my boys can do when pushed. Try me.”

          Choi started to laugh, eyes shining in disbelief at the younger bossing him around. As you peered around Mr. Kim’s frame, you saw him go to say something to officer Chen, but couldn’t form the word. He raised his hand towards the white-haired man, but let it drop with a growl. Whatever look was set upon the elder made him rethink his next move. He settled for raising his hands in a surrender and jerking his head towards his companion to tell him they were leaving. It surprised you that he was giving up so easily after how he had acted towards you. You weren’t sure what Mr. Kim meant by accords and families, but it was more than obvious that it meant something to them. Glancing up at your protector, his face remained locked in the same stern and serious mask he had when he had appeared. His eyes, perfectly lined and accentuated with makeup that only made him more intriguing, followed the pair as they turned down the hall.

          But before they could get too far, Choi stopped. He turned enough to gaze at the two of you over his shoulder, the dark and manic gleam from that morning flashing like a warning sign. He chuckled before his teasing and taunting voice that had called out to Agust filled the hall like glass shattering. “Look at how far our little maniac has come. Really living up to the title of Mad Leader, aren’t you? He thinks he’s so big and strong that he can just order me around and act like a knight in shining armor to the weak. The Mad Leader’s trying so hard to put up a front, to hide who he is, to hide the other side of the looking glass. But lest he forget, I know things he wouldn’t want others to know. And I seem to recall,” Choi turned fully around and took a full stride back towards Mr. Kim, “you had an issue with places like this. You don’t enjoy being here. Are you falling down the rabbit hole? You even have an Alice this time it would seem. So tell me, Mad Leader, are the walls closing in on you yet? Are you feeling anxious?”

          You could feel Mr. Kim tense up at the name ‘Mad Leader’ each time Choi said it. He took a deep breath, trying to ground himself. He gave you a polite push away from him before fixing Choi with a glare that made officer Chen startle. You could almost feel the air change as he stepped up to be nose to nose with the thug.

          “Since you can’t seem to remember my name, asshole, let me spell it out for you. It’s RM, R to the M. And I’m a motherfucking monster. Keep pushing me. I dare you. You hurt one of my boys. You better pray that he makes it out of all this ok. Or you’ll see just how ‘mad’ I can get.”

          Chen seemed to realize that something bad was building as he took hold of his superior and pulled him away from RM, newly identified. Choi kept the taunting smile spread across his lips as he allowed Chen to lead him away. Before he got too far, he looked over at you and gave a nod, “We’ll be in touch, Little Girl.” And then he disappeared from the floor, leaving you in the presence of RM. You can’t say you had expected this person to belong to the voice on the other end of the phone, but it would seem like that was the theme of the day. The tall man took a few deep breaths and ran his hand through his white hair before turning back to you. The serious mask he had worn had slipped away and was more approachable. He straightened his clothes before returning to your side.

          “I’m sorry you had to see that,” he said, “But he shouldn’t be back. He talks a good game but he knows when he’s out done. Did he hurt you?”

          You shook your head. “I can’t believe he got in. The hospital is on lock down.”

          “Well, he’s been around a while. He has his ways. Now that he’s gone, I was hoping you could help me. I’m looking for a nurse called Y/N.” You locked eyes with him and gave him a nod of affirmation. He gave you a smile, showing off a pair of dimples in his cheeks that made him much more innocent and sweeter than the man who had gone nose to nose with the monstrous thug. “That’s a coincidence. Nice to meet you. Can you show me where to go?”

          “Prove that you’re who you say you are,” you said, taking a step away from him. Despite that you were sure he was the one you had talked to, it seemed like nothing was safe. He looked at you for a moment, before coming to a conclusion. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone before letting his finger glide across the screen. A moment later, Agust phone sounded off in your pocket. He glanced over at you with a bemused look as you pulled the phone out and saw the screen lit up with a notification.

-          God of Destruction: It’s me.

          “Sorry,” you said, feeling embarrassed by your sudden suspicion, “but after that guy flashed a fake police badge at me, I just wanted to be sure. Thank you for coming and for helping me. Are you Agust’s brother or a friend?”

          RM’s eyes narrowed when he heard you say Agust and gave you a strange look. His eyes seemed to dance about you, as if he was trying to figure something out. But as quickly as it appeared, the look disappeared and he smiled again. “We usually call him Suga. Only people who don’t like him call him Agust. I don’t think he’d want you calling him that. Can we go see him now? We’ve been worried about him.” You nodded and motioned him to follow you back to the elevator. As you waited for the doors to reopen, he leaned over and whispered, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell Hyung you had his phone.”

          “What? Does he have some embarrassing things on here,” you joked.

          “Maybe,” came the reply and heard RM chuckle as he allowed you to step into the elevator.

          You hit the button for the floor that they moved Agu- Suga to, the doors slid shut, and the lift jolted to a start. As the sound of the mechanisms filled the space, you caught a glimpse of the tall man flinch. It seemed odd, seeing as he had just faced off against the most frightening person you had ever seen. The taunting words he had said to RM before leaving came to mind, about not liking it in a hospital. It wasn’t uncommon for people to have bad experiences related to hospitals, so you tried to brush it off. Once you had made it to the secure floor, you led him down the hall. You explained that the floor was only accessible to a few people and how they had followed the directions as specified to the director. The entire time, RM listened very intently, eyes never leaving you. He was the picture of professionalism and sincerity. You swiped the two of you into the ward, and he held the door open for you as you led him down the hall to the room. As you neared the room, you wondered if you were going to survive the present of two very handsome men. Hopefully, the rest of his friends that you heard over the phone were somewhat average.

          As you both entered the room, RM came to a stop in the threshold of the door, his eyes staring at the bed. You could see the worry and panic that you had heard over the phone slip across his face. You reached out and touched his arm. He looked at you with an almost innocent gaze, like he was questioning if it was alright to get closer. You gave him a nod and he was beside his friend in a flash. He looked as if he was debating to reach out to Suga, as if he were made of glass, but settled for taking hold of his hand. RM let out a breath and looked relieved to have finally seen his friend. From your place at the edge of the room, you could see how much one meant to the other and all worries about them being as bad as Choi disappeared.

          “Is he going to be ok? What did they do to him,” RM asked, never taking his eyes off his companion.

          “Dr. Na took good care of him,” you said, reaching for the file at the end of the bed. “He was shot twice, once in the shoulder and on his left side. The gunshot wound on his side appeared to be at close range and the bullet went through. Thankfully, there wasn’t much damage done. The bullet was lodged in his shoulder, but Dr. Na was able to remove it and mend up some of the damage. We’ll know more when he wakes up, but he should have full range of motion after some rest. He, also, has some bruised ribs and a slight concussion. Along with bruising and defensive wounds pretty much everywhere. He, also, lost a lot of blood. He’s in the middle of a transfusion now. But he is responding well to everything and we believe he should be waking up soon. With enough care, patience, and support, he should make a full recovery in no time. Which is amazing; when I found him, I was worried with how much blood he had lost that he may have had a harder road to recovery.”

          RM flicked his eyes over to you. “You found him?”

          “They must not have told you. I was on my way to work when I heard the gunshots. I was the first to find him and get him to safety.”

          RM looked like he wanted to ask more questions, when a soft groan came from the bed and drew the attention. Suga took in a deep breath and his body shifted as if fighting to wake and identify the voices. After a tense moment, his body relaxed and his eyes opened slightly. From the edge of the bed, you could see the glazed and shiny effects of the medication still trying to hold him in the state of unconsciousness, and realized he may not fully be aware of what is happening. But you were sure the presence of RM had drawn him out enough to give them a sign that he was okay. RM called out to his hyung softly, drawing Suga’s attention as he gazed about the room.

          “Hyung, hey, can you hear me?”

          Suga’s eyes fully landed on RM. It seemed as if he was fighting his way to recognition before he gave a small, drugged smile back. “Joon,” his voice sounded exhausted and stained.

          RM laughed. “Yeah, Hyung, it’s me. You’re gonna be okay. You’re safe.”

          “Joonie, I think I’m dead. I saw an angel.”

          The whitehaired man reached out and ran his fingers, gently, through his friend’s hair. “No, Hyung, you’re only tired. That bastard messed you up but you’re gonna be alright now. Why don’t you go back to sleep? The boys and I will be here when you wake up.”

          “Oh,” Suga said, almost sounding disappointed as the drugs started to drag him back to oblivion, “too bad. It was a pretty angel. Prettier than Jiminie and Hyungie combined. But don’t tell them I said that.” And just as fast as he woke, Suga went silent and still again.

#bts fanfic #bts fic #bts imagines #bts mafia au #bts mafia fic #yoongi x reader #bangtan boys #ot7 x reader #min yoongi #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungguk #jeon jungkook #bangtan fic #bemylight #elphiej #badassNamjoon

[meichenxi]

Dear ‘White guy speaks perfect X and shocks Y!’ language YouTubers: STOP

A rant about every single fucking video by Xiaomanyc and similar YouTubers all titled things like CLUELESS WHITE GUY/GIRL LEARNS [INSERT NON-WHITE LANGUAGE HERE] AND SHOCKS [INSERT PLACE].

Disclaimer: I am white British, and I am also very often a moron. I'm trying to inform myself more, and would like to learn. So let me know if there is anything I should change, anything I’ve got wrong or any terminology I can change. 

So this evening I opened YouTube to get some quality Hikaru no Go content, and saw yet another video recommended to me about Xiaomanyc called Clueless white guy orders in perfect Chinese, shocks patrons and staff!!!!

Really? Really. Ok, his Chinese certainly is good - but it isn't great. And it isn’t necessarily any better than people I've seen in the higher levels of a class at university who have spent some time in China. It's solidly intermediate. That's not an insult - that level of Chinese is hard to attain, and definitely worth celebrating!! Hell, I celebrate every new word I learn. But while it may be unusual, it doesn't forgive the clickbait type videos like 'White guy speaks perfect Chinese and wows [insert place]'. 

These kind of clickbait titles rest on a number of assumptions. Before I say any more, I just want to make a note about terminology. Note that ’majority’ and ‘minority’ are not necessarily helpful labels, because they imply both a) a higher number of speakers in a certain place, and b) socially prestigious in some way. Of course a language like standard Mandarin is not a minority in China, but it might be in Germany. Talking about ‘minority’ languages that have a large speaker base outside of the country, like Chinese, is also not the same as talking about languages that have been systematically surpressed by a colonising, dominant language in their original communities, like indigenous languages. In many communities, especially in colonial and post-colonial situations, the language spoken by the majority is not one of prestige at all. Or some languages may be prestigious and expected in oral contexts, but not written - and so on. I use these terms here as best I can, but don't expect them to work 100% of the time.

So let’s unpack these assumptions a little. 

1) That there is something inherently more ‘worthy’ in somebody who learns languages because they want to, rather than because they have to: and that, correspondingly, the people who want to are white (spoilers: much of Europe is multilingual, and white immigrants in majority white countries also exist, as well as discrimination against them e.g. Polish people in the UK), and that those who have to learn are not (spoilers: really? There are plenty of non-white monolinguals who are either happy being monolingual, don’t have access to learning, or don’t have to learn another language but are interested in it).

2) That everybody from a certain background automatically speaks all ‘those’ languages already, or that childhood multilingualism is a free pass - spoilers, it isn’t. Achieving high levels of fluency in multiple languages is hard, especially for languages with different writing systems, because no matter how perfect your upbringing, you’re still ultimately exposed to it maximum 50% of the time of monolingual speakers. Realistically, most people get far less exposure than 50% in any of their languages. Also, situations of multilingualism in many parts of the world are far more complex than home language / social language. You might speak one language with your father and his father, another with your mother and her family, another in the community, and another at school. Which one is your native language then? Monolinguals tell horror stories of ‘both cups half empty’ scenarios, but come on - how on earth do you expect a person to have the same size vocabulary in a language they hear only 25% of the time? Also, languages are spoken in different domains, to different people, in different social situations: just because someone hears Farsi at home doesn’t mean they can give a talk on the filing system at their local library. If something is outside of a multilingual person’s langauge domain, they might have to learn the vocabulary for it just like monolinguals. There’s no such thing as the ‘perfect bilingual’. 

3) That learning another language imperfectly for leisure is laudable, but learning one imperfectly for work or survival is not. If you’re a speaker of a minority language, learning another language is necessary, ‘just what you have to do’, and if you don’t do it ‘properly’, that’s because of your lack of intelligence / laziness etc. It’s cool for the seconday school student to speak a bit of bad Japanese, but not so cool for the Indian guy who runs her favourite restaurant in Tokyo. 

4) That majority speakers learning a minority language is somehow an act of surprising benevolence that should not go unrewarded. Languages are intrinsically tied up with identity - and access to them may not be a right, but a gift. Don’t assume that because you get a good reception with some speakers of one language that speakers of another will be grateful you’re learning their language, or that everyone will react the same. One of the reasons these videos are possible at all is that many Chinese speakers, in my experience, are incredibly welcoming and enthusiastic to non-natives learning Chinese. Some languages and linguistic groups have been so heavily persecuted that imagining such thing as an ‘apolitical’ language learner is a fundamental misunderstanding of the context in which the language is spoken, and essentially an impossibility when the act of speaking claims ownership to a group. Many people will not want you to learn their language, because it has been suppressed for hundreds of years - it’s theirs, not yours. We respect that. Whilst it’s great to learn a minority language, don’t do it for the YouTube likes - do it because you’re genuinely interested in the language, people, culture and history. We don’t deserve anything special for having done so. 

5) That speaking a ‘foreign’ (i.e. culturally impressive / prestigious) language is much more impressive and socially acceptable than speaking a heritage language, home language or indigenous language. There are harmful language policies all around the world that simultaneously encourage the learning of ‘educational’ languages like Spanish, and at the same time forbid the use of the child’s mother tongue in class. And many non-majority languages are not foreign at all - they were spoken here, wherever you are, before English or Spanish or Russian or, yes, standard Mandarin Chinese. Policies that encourage standardised testing in English from a very young age like the ‘No Child Left Behind’ policy in the US disproportionately affect indigenous communities that are trying to revitalise their language against overwhelming callousness and cruelty - they expect bilingual children to attain the same level of English as a monolingual in first grade, which in an immersion school, they obviously won’t (and shouldn’t - they’ll get enough exposure to English as they grow up to make it not matter later down the line). But if the schools want funding, their kids have to pass those tests. 

There’s more to cover - that’s just the tip of the iceberg. 

Some people’s response to these videos and why the titles are ‘wrong’ would be: does it matter that he's white? Shouldn't it just be 'second language learner speaks perfect Chinese'? This is the same sort of attitude as ‘I don’t see race’. I think it does matter that he is white - because communities of many languages around the world are so used to them having to learn a second language and colonial powers not bothering to learn theirs. You wouldn't get the same reactions in these videos if he were Asian American but grew up speaking / hearing no Chinese - because then it would be expected. You also wouldn't get the same reaction if he were an immigrant in a Chinese-speaking community from somewhere else in Asia.

It also implies that all white people = monolingual Americans with no interest in other cultures. While we all are complacent and complicit in failing to educate ourselves about the effects of historical and modern colonialism, titles like this perpetuate a very harmful stereotype - and I don't mean harmful as in 'poor Xiaomanyc', but harmful in that it suggests that this attitude is ok, it's part of 'being white', and therefore doesn't need to change. The reaction when someone doesn't engage with other cultures and isn't willing to learn about them shouldn't be 'lmao classic white guy'. That not only puts the subject in a group with other 'classic white guys', but puts a nice acceptable label on what really is privilege, a lack of curiosity, ignorance, and the opportunity (which most non-white people don't have) to have everything you learn in school and university be about you. If you're ignorant - ok. We are all about many things. But you don't have any excuse not to educate yourself. The 'foreigner experience' that white people get in places like China is not the same as immigrants in a predominantly monolingual, predominantly white English speaking area. As we can see in those kind of videos, white foreigners may be stared at, but ultimately enjoy huge privilege in many places around the world. It's not the same. 

It also ignores, well, essentially the whole of Europe outside the UK and Ireland and many other places around the globe, where multilingualism is incredibly common - and where the racial dichotomy commonly heard in America isn't quite appropriate, or an oversimplification of many complex ethnic/national/racial/religious/linguistic etc factors that all influence discrimination and privilege. Actually many 'white guys' in Europe and places all around the world speak four or five languages to get by - some in highly privileged upbringings and school systems, yes, but others because they have grown up in a border town, or because they are immigrants and want to give their children a better start than they did, or because they want to work abroad and send home money. Many, like people all around the world, don't get a chance to learn to read and write their first language or dialect, which is considered 'lesser' than the majority language (French, Russian, English etc); many people, like Gaelic speakers in Scotland or speakers of Basque in France, have faced historical persecution and have been denied opportunities for speaking their mother tongue. My mother was beaten and my grandparents denied jobs for being Gaelic speakers. They are white, and they have benefited from being white in lots of other ways - but their linguistic experience is light-years from Xiaomanyc's. 

It isn't 'white' to be surprised at a white person speaking another language - it's just ignorant. But the two ARE correlated, because who in modern America can afford to go through twenty one years and still be ignorant? People who have never had to learn a second language; people who have always had everybody adapt to THEIR linguistic needs, and not the other way around. People who have had all media, all books, centred around people who look like them and speak like them. And even in America, that's not just 'white' - that's specifically white (often middle class) English monolinguals.

I'm not saying everybody who doesn't speak a language should feel guilty for not learning one ( it's understandably not the priority for everyone - economic reasons, family, only so many hours in the day - there are plenty of reasons why language learning when you don’t have to is also not accessible to everyone).  But be aware of the double standards we have as a society towards other socially/racially/religiously disadvantaged groups versus white college grads. You can't demonise one whilst lauding the other. 

To all language YouTubers - do yourself a favour, and stop doing this. Your skills are impressive - that's enough. 

 tldr; clickbait titles like this rely on double standards and perpetuate harmful ideas - don't write them, and let your own language skills do the talking please.

#linguistics #lingblr #racism #sociolinguistics #languages #langblr #polyglot community #I don't really know what to tag this as #chinese #xiaomanyc #taking a break from my break to clearly post about two (2) things #hualian over on main and this here #meichenxi manages

[absolutebl]

This Week In BL

Feb 2021 Part 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. 

Ongoing Series Thai 

Manner of Death Ep 11 - a nice beefcake twist, then another twist, plus proud gay dads. We are mighty pleased. 

Cupid Coach Ep 4 - Unbearably boring. I’m out. We are not amused. 

My Bromance Ep 9 - FINALE I watched it unsubbed (I’ve NOT been following since ep 3) and it looks like it has a nice cute happy ending. I’m now interested in binging it once good subs become available. 

1000 Stars Ep 2 - was a lot better than Ep 1, the mains have okay chemistry, the kids are serviceable (child actors, shudder), but I’m really loving all the side characters. We are cautiously optimistic. 

Ongoing Series Not Thai 

You Are Ma Boy Ep 5 (Vietnam) - pacing still good, cuties are still giving it their all, solid little series with bumpy side couples, confession call & response continues apace.

To My Star Ep 7-9 FINALE (Korea) - quirky as all goddamn getup, but so fucking cinnamon roll tasty. Charming end. Recommended so long as you realize we are in Mr Heart style K-BL. (Also @coldties posted a killer MV for this one.) This one will get a movie rerelease like Wish You, hopefully also on Netflix. 

We Best Love: No. 1 For You Ep 6 FINALE (Taiwan) - we got to see boyfriends being domestic af adorable with an ending that was a touch bittersweet but very college appropriate. With season 2 coming March 5 I am disposed to be VERY PLEASED. 

What will we do with ourselves and nothing new out of Korea or Taiwan for two WHOLE weeks? 

Stand Alone 

I rewatched Wish You (2020 Korean series WISH YOU: Your Melody From My Heart now retitled - thank fuck - and available as a movie on Netflix). I have to say Yoon Sang Yi delivers some excellent pining. I’m not a huge insta-love person and there’s some character dev flaws, but it holds up really well and delivers more as a movie then it did as a series.

One of my favorite catches on the rewatch was the way Yoon Sang Yi’s jacket sleeves are always too long. It’s such a perfect little character trait. He is so shy and careful that he shrugs smaller into his coat, and also he hides his hands - when, as a pianist, his hands represent his self actualization and art. He only exposes them when making music... or holding Kang In Soo‘s hand. 

Incidentally, I was moved to look these two up... both out of K-pop. (This is my shocked face.) 

Breaking News 

Lovey Writer dropped its official trailer at last, looking good and trope-filed. It’s set to start Feb 24th. 

Top Secret Together dropped its first promo material (Thai, no eng subs). I’m excited about this one, it’s being lead out by an IRL couple. 

My Engineer 2 

The ME boys dropped an adorable gossip heavy promo vid. ME 2 is finishing up the script and will probably begin filming in April. It’s supposed to still release in 2021 (which makes me worry about post and explains a lot about some of Thai BL’s audio quality issues). With April filming, my guess is for an October (but more likely November) release. 

Close Friend 

Lay talked about his Close Friend project, which is a MV series from BOX Music featuring musically-inclined actors with established BL pairings so:

KimCop (MarkKit from Gen Y)

JimmyTommy (SaifahZon from Why R U)

JaFirst (LeoFiat from TharnType 2)

YoonLay (NottPun from YYY)

Y-Destiny 

Perth talked about Y-Destiny (previous title Destiny) which presumably is already filmed because he said it will be on air at the beginning of this year. As this is a Cheewin project, expect it to be something odd, campy, and frenetic in the YYY style. My guess is they’ll wait until You Only Eat Alone has completed its run before airing Y-Destiny, because who can take more than one Cheewin at a time? No one. Not even Thailand. 

KinnPorsche 

Perth also talked about KinnPorsche. He said it would be on air... but that he wasn’t allowed to say the date, so we can hope this means they finally got distribution. (The excitement over the trailer probably helped - it has over a million views.) He also said they would start filming soon (so Feb/March) which means, if everything goes smoothly, a late summer release at the earliest. However, with an independent studio, high production values, big cast, and fight sequences I would expect KP to have more post than most BLs, so my guess is it will air towards the end of the year. (And I would be scared for quality if they tried for any earlier.) 

KinnPorsche cast also continues to work the BL talk show circuit, they made an appearance on Sosat Seoul Say. Mile & Apo are adorable + good chemistry, in fact the whole cast is adorable with good chemistry, so I’m excited for this series. 

Gossip 

Cutest beans, Sam & Yu of We Best Love, have been dropping the most charming little lives ever. I’m so pleased we are getting a second season out of them. I can’t remember the title because, ya know, Taiwanese titles are beyond bonkers. But season 2 is listed now. 

Hong Kong is reported to be filming its first BL Series (15 eps to air on VIUTV). It will be an adaptation of 2018 Japanese BL drama Ossan’s Love (maybe same title?). Like Cherry Magic this is an office romcom: 30s single man who isn't popular with women lives with his parents. When they kick him out, he moves in with a coworker. Turns out this guy has a crush on him, as does another dude from his office. Foundational tropes: Office romance meets forced proximity meets love triangle. I expect the style out of Hong Kong to be somewhat similar to Taiwan, however they are politically less independent of China Main (although culturally VERY different) so this series could be DOA (for gay) or get killed early in its run (see Addicted web series - or don’t see it, if you’re in China). Also, like the Japanese original (and unlike most Taiwanese stuff), expect VERY low heat. That said, 15 eps is nothing to sneeze at, even if they are only 15-20 min each. So I guess I am... intrigued? 

Next Week Looks Like This: 

February Update: Others that are airing but I’m not following: 

Fools (Vietnamese) - I don’t think it’s going to end happily (it’s from the Stage of Love peeps), so I’m waiting to binge if it does 

Brothers (Thai) - deals with taboo relationships from the Thank God it’s Friday people (this will not end well) 

Happenstance (Pinoy) - I don’t follow Pinoy BL closely

One Day Pag-ibig (Pinoy) - ibid 

Love or Lie (Pinoy) - ibid 

The Alter (Pinoy) - ibid 

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here. 

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something. 

#thai bl #thaibl #bl 2021 #bl gossip #upcoming bl #my engineer 2 #kinnporsche #y-destiny #close friend project #ossan’s love #hong kong bl #chinese bl #taiwanese bl #Vietnamese BL #Vietnamese drama #pinoy bl #pinoy drama #lovely writer #We Best Love: No.1 For You

[fascinationuniformed]

Big Patreon Updates!

Hello, friends.

READ IT ON PATREON HERE.

You may have noticed that all of the Tiers have been rewritten, improved, or otherwise changed.

I have been mulling this over for a long while and finally sat down on Friday (at a very nice local library) to both simplify and improve the offering. After a couple of years of doing this, I think I've got an idea of what people who are so very kind enough to enable me to make more and more sexy smexy content seem to want.

So, I have modified some of the tiers that felt... lackluster and have proved to be a colossal failure on my part, and improved the ones that have done really well. Any changes will NOT be retroactive, and anything I've posted in the past will remain available as it currently stands.

Again, this whole thing, the crowdsourcing of creative labour, is still new and strange to me. So if any of the changes are a big dumpster fire NO for you, please let me know.

But, to summarize, biggest changes:

1. Sketches: I have kept all my self-initiated work public to Patreons before I go and publish them. But I feel that this no longer functions in the current format. Now, the smallest Patreon support will be exclusively for sketches, and updates on my goings-on. Which means I will be posting a lot more content on the process of how I make things.

2. Finished Illustrations: I have made it obvious that I will always make my self-initiated and commissioned work freely available at some point. I make all of these for people to enjoy. But, as of now-ish, if you want to see the finished illustrations months before anyone else, you'll have to join the "Sneaky Peaky" tier. But to make it more attractive, I'll also be throwing in views of other work I am getting on to. For example, a fantasy adventure comic me and an artist friend are working on. And maybe even the script to my Power Rangers comic.

3. Chibi Commissions: I've added a new tier. Chibi commissions! Wooh. Kind of self-explanatory, that one.

4. Flash Fiction: I've been mulling this tier for a good while and have decided to keep it. Over February I got into the habit of writing short pieces of fiction prompted by photographs, roleplays or other material and it was really, really fun. As such, I'd like to offer people the chance to request written content in a more formal way.

Wait, there's more!

But that's not it.

There are a couple of things I am still working on that I want to add to Patreon, as well as to create some synergy with other platforms to give people more options. Personally, I do not trust a single platform and would rather join up with other folk to create our own website with content available to people. You know, as if it were 2007. But that is not something I can do now.

So, as I continue to review what Fascination Uniformed is for me and for you, here are some of the things you can expect this month:

Archive of Art, Stories and Captions: I know, I've been promising this one for a long time. But finally realized I was overthinking it. So, it will be a Dropbox link. It will have organized folders with all the work I've made publicly available, and perhaps some I've even forgotten to upload. This one will be a Patreon Tier at 5 of your local currency.

Videos and Timelapses: I've filmed myself drawing some things of the last year. Sometimes I talk, sometimes I don't. My main issue is that I am hopeless when it comes to video encoding, so the files always end up being HUGE and with crap quality. But maybe it is time to actually make use of these.

Merch: I am investigating whether to offer Pre-Orders for three bundles of prints, badges, and collected comic zines for people. This one I first need to test and see if people want. But, otherwise, I may open a RedBubble shop and see if people wanna get kinky prints for their walls. Dunno, it is an idea.

So... yeah. And, as usual, I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts, comments and ideas about my plans. I sort of sprung this one out of the blue, but I just had to make it happen. Finally.

Enough of me rambling.

#patreon #blog #big update

[deltaengineering]

that was the winter anime 2021 that was

Still not quite ready for a dozen posts about how terrible the likes of Combatants Will Be Dispatched are, sorry. Watch Vivy though, it owns. Here’s some more things that are (mostly) good. As always, worst to best.

Yatogame-chan Kansatsu Nikki S3

Yatogame has long run out of hot Nagoya facts and its ensemble comedy never amounted to much, so now it seems mostly content to just spam more and more wacky character designs. About the only thing that it has left going for it is that 3 minutes a week are more effort to drop than to watch, so I expect them to make a movie next. 4/10

Go-toubun no Hanayome S2

Quints is a weird one. S1 was a barely good enough (i.e., well above average) implementation of the ages old harem chestnut. S2 is actually better at the core of its appeal, since it gives all the characters a sharper profile (things like taking Nino from joke to badass and making Ichika a villain are no mean feat), but it does pay a steep price for it. You see, to deliver a steady drip feed of meaningful character moments it apparently has to rush through the source material at a breakneck pace, which completely wrecks the "story" part of this story and makes every episode seem like a recap. And it still keeps wasting precious time on vestigial nonsense like its framing device and the Kyoto flashback scenario that was already the worst part of S1. But by far the most annoying aspect is its insistence on keeping all the options valid, since it prevents any real progress and makes everything seem arbitrary and pointless. So sure enough, after a season of much ado we still don't end up anywhere — you can't really raise the stakes if all at stake was "who wins" to begin with. It's watchable and even enjoyable scene-for-scene but it's getting harder and harder to call it a solid show overall. 5/10

Skate Leading Stars

I was watching this primarily because I didn't like Yuri on Ice much and wanted to see if something that is a blatant attempt to cash in on it would be better — because while YoI delivers on one aspect (being hella gay), it really is an absolute shambles of a sports show. And sure enough, Skate Leading has none of the auteur appeal of YoI, but it just works much better. In particular I appreciate how it managed to make me care even a little about a cast of assholes, which is a nice contrast to the nauseatingly ingratiating way YoI tries to make you love its characters. Also, Skate Leading is just generally cheap and unambitious, so not susceptible to trying hard and painfully flaming out on the presentation side like YoI is. But at some point you gotta let go of these comparisons and on its own Skate Leading is... just fine, I guess? Competent, mildly engaging, not very memorable. And that's probably where it loses to Yuri on Ice in the end after all, even if I think it's "better". 6/10

Idoly Pride

Idoly Pride sold itself on me with a really good (and hilarious/tragic) first episode that was just too bizarre to ignore — I mean, how can you ignore GHOST IDOL MANAGERS. Well, the majority of the show isn't like that. It's a competent and solid version of the idol franchise show, yes, but it really had more potential than that. Especially midseason, it gets lost in these dozens of characters, and while they're all likeable, it does seem like a waste of a good story just centered on Mana/Kotona/Sakura. By the end it comes back around to the heart of the matter with a Maeda-style sob story, which could be a disaster but seasoned veteran Jukki Hanada makes it work anyway. Overall, there's quite a bit of ridiculous hacky melodrama in this, but quite honestly that's the best part and I wish it would concentrate more on it. The rest is just okay. 6/10

Yuru Camp S2

Yuru Camp is still likely the best pure iyashikei show when it gets down to business. Compared to S1 though, this seems to happen less and less. At its peaks (i.e., basically any quiet moment with Rin) it's at least as good as ever, and there's some good cast additions like Mini-Inuko, but it appears that Yuru Camp simply has run out of things you can do with camping and it fills up the time with other... stuff. This stuff includes the generic school club shenanigans it was never particularly good at, and a gigantic helping of crass consumerism. Yeah, I would say the majority of Yuru Camp is just a straight up infomercial at this point, which itself ranges from the perfectly acceptable (which cute anime isn't about food constantly), to the sketchy (I don't know whether the Izu tourism board cut this production a fat check, but if they didn't, Yuru Camp still gives its best effort to make it seem that way) to the highly irritating – I am aware that camping requires gear and you can't just ignore that, but you most definitely do not require whole arcs dedicated to talking about raising funds for the purposes of acquiring the Lamp of Comfy Happiness at your friendly local Caribou™ either. Not to mention an arc where the aforementioned lame school club does the same, for double irritation. Make no mistake, this show is so riddled with scenes that beg for a solution to embed affiliate links in video files that it makes me wish I was watching something as anticapitalist and underground as Love Live. And irritating really is the last thing a show with this core concept, as stellar as it is at that, can afford to be. Bummer. 6/10

SKOO the Infinity

Skoo has one really huge asset: ADAM, its magnificent villain. It also has one really huge liability: Reki, its not magnificent protagonist. To be more specific, it's very good at anything outrageous, physics-defying and silly, such as most scenes ADAM is in, and quite bad at anything serious, dramatic (in a serious way) and down to earth, such as most scenes Reki is in. So, what's the verdict? Well, the rest of the cast is more ADAM-like, and Reki's co-protagonist Langa is fine as the straight (yeah, right) man. The tedious buddy drama is a comparatively small part of this show, and at least it pays off quite well in the end. Seriously, I was ready to give this a 6, but the final episode is probably the best one of the show, in all of its aspects. That's really not something you see often. Skoo's a great time. Except when it's not. 7/10

Non Non Biyori Nonstop

Speaking of the rare good ending, what about we gave one of those to a slim and inconsequential slice-of-life show? NNB has always been solid, comfy and amusing quality with a couple of standout moments (usually something with Renge), and Nonstop has that plus an ending as conclusive as any show of this type is ever going to have. Besides, it does a lot of things right by focusing on more characters than the central 4 (especially Konomi has great material in S3), it expands the universe just enough to not get stale, and it moves things forward — It's definitely a lot better than the movie, is what I'm saying. Apart from that, well, we're three seasons in, if you have any interest in this you probably don't need me to explain what's good about NNB at this point. Bonus points for being nothing but an ad for the manga. 7/10

Wonder Egg Priority

Oh boy, so here's the big one. Wonder Egg is the rare Meaningful Arthouse Show About Real Issues You Guys, as you might have heard. And well, the long and short of it is that it's a very good show with quite a few glaring problems (besides not actually being finished due to production issues, but what we have is enough of an ending to be able to meaningfully talk about it). In particular, one problem: WEP is, at its core, one of these metaphorical Magical Girl-ish series that are just a thin layer of abstraction over coming-of-age or societal problems. The issue is that "metaphorical" in this case means "literal" and "thin" means "basically nonexistent". This show is not subtle regarding what it's about, at all. This is a double-edged sword — on the positive side, some things really should just be said aloud, and I'm really, really fucking tired of the Ikuhara style of "here's some wacky things, maybe a blog post will eventually tell you how it's actually about the most important thing ever" obfuscation — if it's really so important, just spell it out. On the other hand, there are limits to this and when a second, different Ai appears I don't really need a voiceover line telling me that yep, this show is about parallel universes now. WEP spells out many important things, but it also spells out many things that are implicitly clear or better left vague. Not to mention that with being so obvious up front, the show's tendency to leave figuring out what it's actually saying about it up to the viewer can leave the wrong impression. Again, I settled on the opinion that it's subtle after all where it counts the most, but you might easily get the impression that it pulls its punches (Ikuhara does this the exact other way around — once you figure out what the fuck he's talking about it's abundantly clear what he's saying about it).

In fact, this show is so good at subtle, quiet character moments that it calls into question the need for big huge fighting fantasy layer in the first place, especially since I'm not a fan of the fantasy designs and the fights aren't great. Sure, they look impressive on a technical level (this show is very good looking in general), but the lack of actual impact or rhythm makes me think this is not made by people who are very familiar with action and maybe they should have asked some seasoned shounen veterans for this — or just, you know, not do it. They can (and do) impress with character acting in quiet scenes just the same. And while Ai's character story actually does pay off quite nicely by the end we got, and Momoe and Rika are also handled well, Neiru's backstory is significantly less good, not to mention the whole Frill subplot regarding the show's mythology that they introduced just before (and that's the part to be resolved at a later date), which is a huge can of worms. We'll see how well they handle that, I suppose, but as it is it's a weird and vestigial detour that doesn't add much besides thematic headaches.

But yeah, apart from all that — I like it, a lot. Great character writing in the details, cool looks for the most part, tons of ambition, and a message that I consider to be appropriately handled — for the most part, and for now. Not quite ambitious arthouse anime at its finest, but also not a pretentious disaster like Sarazanmai, Monogatari et al. 8/10

#anime #review #winter2021 #Yatogame-chan Kansatsu Nikki #Go-toubun no Hanayome #Skate Leading Stars #Idoly Pride #Yuru Camp #sk8 the infinity #Non Non Biyori #wonder egg priority

[bonjour-rainycity]

Odin’s Ward ~ Chapter 1

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Rating: T

Summary: After your mother’s untimely death, your father sees no use for you in Alfheim’s castle. He turns to Odin and Frigga, his longtime friends, and begs them to raise his daughter. This results in what many families yearn for their daughters to have: practically unhindered access to Asgard’s finest resources, as well as the attention of Asgard’s princes. Closer in age and personality, you get along better with Loki, and the two of you become fast friends. As you get older, that friendship grows into something more. Always hanging over your head is the threat of your father calling you back to Alfheim to fulfill the one duty he has for you: entering into a strategic marriage and increasing his own power. Still, you and Loki decide to make the most of the time you have left...however long that may be. 

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters nor am I making any money from this story. 

A/n: Hello, thank you for stopping by! I originally posted this on ff.net, but now that I’m reading it, I kind of hate it. So I decided to clean it up, rework it a bit, and post it here! Also, all the ages I include here are the Earthly approximates of Aesir ages. Because they live for thousands of years, time passes differently for them. I just went with my approximation of their Earthly ages for my sanity and simplicity’s sake. 

Word count: 2947

Warnings: None

Y/n: 7 // Loki: 9 // Thor: 14

Y/n’s POV

“Come now, girl,” Odin’s pinched voice calls ahead of me. I pick up the skirt of my dress and quicken my pace, hoping not to displease him further. The high walls of the castle are imposing enough—I don’t need the added stress of an angry king. Odin continues. “This is Idsol. She will show you to your room and serve as your nanny until you are old enough to require a maidservant.”

He says nothing more. Taking that as a dismissal, I curtsey and murmur a, “thank you, Your Majesty,” to the king.

Idsol, an older, severe-looking woman with a slicked back bun, beckons to me, and I follow her to the doors of my new chambers. When she speaks, her voice is rough, though her phrasing is elegant. It is clear she’s grown up in the influence of Court. “Here, let us get you changed into something fresh.” She leads me into a generously sized room and takes me straight to the wardrobe on the far-right wall. I don’t even have time to assess my new dwellings, because Idsol is pulling the fabric of my dress over my head and shoving me into a new one made of a soft blue color.

“Dinner begins at seven o’clock. I will come to retrieve you and escort you to dinner. During dinner, you will take your seat quietly and not speak unless spoken to. Understand?”

She waits for my nod before continuing. “Keep your head down and your elbows off the table. You don’t want to make a bad first impression, do you?”

I shake my head ‘no’, but in reality, I can’t find the energy to care. It’s been a long, exhausting day, and there’s still nearly half of it left. “Good.” Idsol approves. “Stay here in your chambers until I come to collect you.”

She leaves and I stare blankly at the door, not feeling much at all. Lacking the willpower necessary to climb onto the huge bed, I sit on the cold stone floor and pull my tiny doll—Elsa—into my arms. It’s then that the tears hit me. I rock myself back and forth, clutching the doll that looks so much like my mother, searching for a comfort that is unlikely to be found.

“Mama…” The name echoes off the stone walls.

{***}

When my room becomes dark due to the absence of sun streaming through the windows, Nanny Idsol finds me curled into a ball on the floor, still gripping my doll. Tears stain my face, but I ran out of new ones long ago.

“Oh, now,” Nanny Idsol chastises, pulling me off the ground and setting me on the plush bed. She disappears, returning moments later with a washrag, which she uses to wipe my face clean. She quickly styles my hair into a presentable braid, then picks me up and places me on the ground. “Time for dinner.” She plucks Elsa from my hands, earning a noise of protest from me, which she quickly silences with a look.

I follow her dejectedly to the eating hall. She pushes me in, then abandons me. I file into what I hope is my seat. As the King’s Ward, I know I’m invited to dine with the Royal Family, but I do not feel lucky, as many would. I just feel sad.

King Odin enters and I stand, well aware of protocol even in my current state. As soon as he sits, I make a move to take my seat again, but am stopped by a warm hand gripping my elbow.

Gulping in surprise, I raise my head to see who is touching me. The boy stopping me is tall with wavy blonde hair reaching to his chin. Most likely one of Odin’s sons.

“My Lady, I’m afraid that this is my seat.”

“I-I…”I try to speak, but all that comes out is air. Panicked, I look at the ground.

The boy sighs and uses his grip on my elbow to pull me to the middle of the table. The King’s seat.

“Father, who is this and where does she sit?” Annoyance colors the boy’s voice. If I had to guess, I’d say this one is Prince Thor. I’d heard he’s the eldest of the two.

Odin looks up and seems surprised by my presence. “Ah, I almost forgot.” He stands, evidently preparing to make an announcement. I take a few steps back, hoping to hide behind Prince Thor’s height. It doesn’t work.

“Lords and Ladies of Asgard.” The Court snaps to attention. “It is my…pleasure,” he seems to stumble over the word, “to present to you Y/n Y/L/N. After the tragic death of her mother, my family has agreed to take her in and raise her in her family’s stead.”

Prince Thor rolls his eyes and pushes me forward so the people in the eating hall can get a better look at me. I feel my cheeks heat up as I look down at the sixty-or-so gods and goddesses in the room. They applaud, evidently pleased with Odin’s charity. He smiles and waves before taking his seat a few moments later. The matter of my seat, however, has yet to be resolved.

“Mother?” Prince Thor’s voice is now positively whining.

Queen Frigga looks up at us and assesses the situation. A kind smile crosses her face, and I feel a twinge in my heart. “Sit here, child.” She points to a seat at the far left end of the table next to a boy a few years older than me who had previously gone unnoticed. He’s likely Prince Loki, the youngest.

I shuffle to my seat and wait to be served.

The boy gives me a couple of curious glances but doesn’t say anything until dessert, when he confirms my hunch. “I’m Prince Loki.”

I look up to meet his kind green eyes. “Y/n.” He nods, and that’s the end of it.

After dinner, Nanny Idsol comes to escort me back to my room. As she changes me for bed, she feels the need to talk. “Did you enjoy dinner, Young Mistress?”

I shrug. I don’t remember the taste of anything. Nanny Idsol’s mouth sets into a frustrated line, but she says nothing further. She puts me into bed and leaves me to my tearful night.

{***}

The next three days drag by. I spend every moment I can in my room, but I am still forced to attend dinner. My spot continues to be next to Prince Loki, who never ceases his curious glances but rarely says more to me than, “please pass the butter”. No one else acknowledges my presence.

On the fourth day of my self-imposed isolation, there’s a knock at my door. I open it to see Queen Frigga standing there with a soft smile on her face. My eyes widen and I quickly curtsy. “Good morning, Your Majesty.”

She clasps her hands together, her grace and expensive dress causing her to appear statuesque. When she speaks, it’s with the grace and elegance only obtained through royal blood and years of quality instruction. “Good morning, Lady Y/n. How are you today?”

My mouth goes dry. This is the most intense conversation I’ve had since I departed from Alfheim. “Q-quite well, Your Majesty. And yourself?”

An amused smile floats across her face. “I’ve nothing to complain about. Tell me, young one, why do you keep yourself locked in your chambers?” She bends slightly so she’s closer to my height, but I am still intimidated. It’s not everyday the Queen personally visits the young daughter of a diplomat.

I don’t risk lying to her. “I miss my home, Your Majesty.” She raises an eyebrow, expecting me to elaborate. I oblige. “I miss my friends, and my tutors, and my horses. I miss the music and the sunsets. I miss…” My voice trails off and my eyes find a spot on the floor. I just want to go back to bed.

But the Queen is not done with me, and probes further. “You miss…?”

I sigh, realizing I cannot avoid the words it will hurt to confront. “I miss my mother.”

Queen Frigga’s face turns into one colored with pity and sadness, and something in my stomach clenches. “Young Y/n, your mother is now in Vanaheim, a place lovelier than any other. It is our burden to miss the ones that are gone, but we should also celebrate their fortune. She is happy, I can promise you that. And she watches over you still; she cares for you and sends her love to you.”

My eyes fill with tears. I bite my lip in a desperate attempt to keep them from spilling over.

The Queen continues. “Although I did not know your mother well, I am a mother myself. And, as a mother, I can guess that it would sadden her to see you sequestered into your chambers all these hours. Come, let us get you freshened up. You shall please your mother by playing with the other children.”

I sniffle and follow her to my wardrobe. The impropriety of the situation manages to strike me. “Your Majesty, I can call for Nanny Idsol—”

“Do not trouble yourself,” she interrupts, ending my attempts at protesting. “I know how to dress a young lady, as I once was one…long, long ago.” She throws an impish smile over her shoulder, one I’m sure she does not show often. I feel honored, and a hesitant smile begins on my face. She finds a dress that catches her eye. “How about this? Lilac would look lovely with your hair.” I blush and thank the Queen.

Soon, I’m wearing a new dress and my hair is done in a braid wrapping around my head.

Queen Frigga says nothing of the doll in my arms and beckons me to follow her into the hallway. There, we find a scandalized Nanny Idsol.

“Y-Your Majesty, please. Let me escort Lady Y/n. You must have—”

Queen Frigga cuts my nanny off with a raised hand. “Thank you for your offer, Nanny Idsol, but I’m sure I can manage. In the future, however, please remember that a good caretaker does not ignore the needs of her ward.”

“Y-yes, my Queen. Sorry, my Queen.”

Queen Frigga offers a kind yet firm smile, and I’m filled with admiration. What it must take to exude the perfect balance of authority and benevolence.

We continue on our route, and I get more and more confused as we wind through the labyrinthine halls. It will be quite some time before I will be ready to accurately navigate Castle Asgard alone.

We come to a double set of large oak doors, and the guards posted outside straighten before opening them wide. Cool air hits my face.

The room is a large, circular shape, and the center is slightly lowered than the rest. Mostly decorated in browns and golds, the room has an earthy feel to it. A window opposite the doors allows for some natural light, but the room is largely lit by light spheres and torches. I raise my eyebrows appreciatively. This room could be quite peaceful.

“Mother!”

Any hope of peace is quickly erased by the sight and sound of the two Asgardian princes.

“Thor, Loki.” The Queen uses their names as a fond greeting. “Spend some time with Lady Y/n; help her to feel more at home.” Both boys nod dutifully, but I can tell Prince Thor is a little annoyed at his task of entertaining a young girl. I restrain a huff of indignation. If only he knew how content I would be in my own chambers.

Still, I retain my respectful attitude. “Thank you, Your Majesty.” I curtsy as the Queen leaves, then turn to my face my playmates, curtsying to them both as well.

“Your Highnesses, I am sorry to disrupt your time of leisure.” They both stare at me blankly, as if they’re unsure what to do with me.

Finally, Prince Thor nods, and I take that as my dismissal. I find a spot on the edge of the room and sit there with my doll. Quickly, Prince Thor and Prince Loki forget my presence and resume their game of war. I busy myself playing with Elsa’s hair, admiring how well the color resembles the one shared by me and my mother. It reflects off the light from the torches, creating a mesmerizing effect. I spend the better part of an hour braiding and re-braiding the hair of my doll.

“Mother said to play with her.” Despite his attempts, Prince Loki’s hushed voice carries to my side of the room.

“No,” his brother’s voice retorts, full of manufactured authority. “Mother said to make her feel at home. She looks pretty at home to me on that edge there.”

Prince Loki huffs, and Prince Thor rolls his eyes. “I did not mean that rudely, just that she does not seem like the type of girl to enjoy being around other people.”

I pretend to not have heard their conversation as the youngest prince stomps over to me, his brother reluctantly following behind him.

Prince Loki stops a few feet from me, raising an eyebrow. “Would you like to join us, My Lady?”

Knowing better than to refuse the request of a prince, I accept. “I would be honored, Your Grace.”

Prince Loki takes it upon himself to explain the rules of the game. “You see, Thor’s the hero, and I’m the villain. My goal is to steal the orb he’s guarding, and Thor’s job is not to let me.” Upon seeing Prince Thor’s pointed stare, Prince Loki quickly adds, “You can be on my team.”

I continue to stand safely out of the way.  “Thank you, Your Grace.”

“Ready…go!” Prince Thor’s booming voice begins the game. I study Prince Loki’s movements as he tries to concoct a strategy to get past his brother. Prince Thor is older and stronger, but Prince Loki is clearly smarter. He uses strategy and cunning in his attempts, while Prince Thor relies on brute strength. In the end though, Prince Thor wins by decisively tossing his brother across the room. My eyes widen and I clutch Elsa tighter to my chest, but Prince Loki just laughs good-naturedly and brushes himself off, walking back to join us in the center of the room.

“Lady Y/n, why don’t you take a turn?”

Prince Thor and I are in similar states of disagreement with Loki’s suggestion, yet neither of us argues. Not loosening my grip on my doll, I step forward to face Prince Thor. He’s at least double my height and his arms are the size of my head. I’ve heard tales of his affability, but he could probably crush me on accident alone! Still, I dig my heels into the floor, steeling myself for what’s to come. He lets me make the first move—a small step in his direction—before ending my forward progress; with a grand step, he’s placed himself in front of me. He reaches his meaty arms toward my frame and—

Bam!

He takes a startled step backwards.

It takes a second before the gravity of what I’ve just done hits me. Oh gods. I just punched the future king of Asgard in the face.

Prince Loki howls with laughter, but I am utterly mortified.

“Your Highness, please forgive me. I-I am so sorry! I don’t now why I did that. I-I just…”

Prince Thor glowers.

Prince Loki steps between us. “Oh, come now, brother. You cannot seriously be angry with the girl. You scared her, and she reacted accordingly! Leave her be.” Prince Loki’s defense of me is harmed somewhat by his continued laughter.

Prince Thor’s eyebrows twitch before he excuses himself and stalks off to the other side of the room to do some exercise.

Prince Loki’s giggles subside but the mortified look does not leave my face. Still choking a bit on his laughter, he approaches me. “Lady Y/n, I assure you, you did no harm. I do not mean to offend you, but Thor will not have so much as a bruise on his face, as there was not enough force behind your strike.”

I nod dimly, still in a state of shock. I just punched Thor Odinson. My father will be livid if he ever finds out.

As if he can sense what I’m thinking, Prince Loki softens. “No one will know what has occurred here today. Come sit with me, I think I know of a way to cheer you.”

Doubtfully, I follow him to a set of chairs a few feet away.

“May I borrow your doll?”

I very reluctantly hand him Elsa, my most treasured possession.

Prince Loki wraps his hands around her and closes his eyes, already deep in his concentration. His lips twitch as he mutters something I can’t hear, but when he opens his eyes, Elsa straightens.

I furrow my brows and lean in, confused yet eager to see what will happen next.

Prince Loki sets Elsa on the ground between us and lets go. She begins to dance!

My eyes widen and I can’t help it: I laugh. I laugh and clap in delight until Prince Loki joins me. Our laughter even draws Prince Thor in, and the sight of my dancing doll draws a hesitant smile to his face. This is how Queen Frigga finds us when she comes to summon us to dinner, and I can’t help but notice the happiness behind her eyes.

A/n Thanks for reading! Let me know what you thought of it and if you would like to be added to the tag list :) 

Link to next part: https://bonjour-rainycity.tumblr.com/post/629970408715763712/odins-ward-chapter-2

Tag list: @80strashbag @dark-night-sky-99

#Loki #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #thor #marvel #marvel fanfiction #marvel reader-insert #loki reader-insert #friends to lovers #slow burn #we love tropes yayyy #loki x reader #loki x you #loki x y/n

[vin-taege]

low expectations | 3

summary: after disappearing for six years to pursue law, you come back to Seoul, only to be hired by Jeon Jungkook, tattoo artist on the rise, and your high school ex

genre: angst, eventual smut, l2e2l (lovers to enemies [kinda?] to lovers)

pairing: tattoo artist!jungkook x lawyer!reader

words: 3k+

note: i am back

"Mmm holy shit, I missed bread," You stared at Taehyung, who was shamelessly stuffing croissant after croissant in his face. Jimin sipped his latte awkwardly. Jungkook was back in his usual reserved state, silent, though visibly disturbed by Taehyung's lack of table etiquette. The whole table was captivated by the tattoo artist's seemingly never ending appetite, and at this point, Jungkook began to regret letting him borrow his credit card. Namjoon was first to break the silence. 

"So," he cleared his throat. "We came up with a list of possible suspects. The cocaine packet we found was already sent to a facility for DNA testing.”

"It's not exactly a list. More like one person," you got the case file out your bag. What back then was a thin folder filled with a singular page was now filled with paperclips and slightly dishevelled pages - the fruit of your research with Namjoon. You took the picture you printed out of the Gwangju rapper and put it beside a recent picture of Jung. "Don't these two conveniently look alike?" 

Jungkook leaned in to get a closer look, eyes straining to grasp any familiar features he could pick up from the low quality print. Suddenly, Yoongi jolted up, snatching the picture from the table. "How did you get this?"

"You know him?"

"Yeah, it's Hoseok. He went under the name 'J-Hope' back then until he just disappeared."

Taehyung hacked back a cough, a huge chunk of bread lodging itself in his throat. Jimin thumped him worriedly on the back, waving the rest of you off to ignore them. You continued questioning Yoongi." Joon, write this down. Can you elaborate on that?"

"I went against him back then Gyeongsangnam."

"He sucked ass."

"No, I mean, what happened after? Did you notice anything interesting about him? Something out of place?"

"Oh, well... From what I recall, he does look awfully a lot like Minho. Almost the same person. It's weird because they have the same last name too."

Namjoon shared a wary look with you. "Changing identities is very common for people in the illegal drugs industry. I'll get someone from the firm to run a background check on him."

You nodded. "Anything else?"

"I remember the police coming to raid the place. You know how there are some underground rapping contests? Ours was really underground. No ads, only word of mouth. You have to know someone there to get in. So we knew someone must've fucked up real bad for the police to get involved."

That's why you couldn't find any musical records or history on him. Namjoon was typing away at his laptop, seemingly getting the same idea.

"To be fair, nothing we did was illegal. The competition, the prize money, all legal. But that wasn't the problem. The problem was they caught Hoseok possessing marijuana. They shut everything down and took him with them. Never seen him ever since."

Everyone went silent again - even Taehyung ceased his coughing. Namjoon finished typing, readjusting his glasses." What year did that happen?"

"Somewhere in 2013. I think it was in April?"

"You mean to say,"  Jimin spoke up. "This Hoseok guy coincidentally disappeared six months before Soliloqy opened?”

Your jaw dropped, Namjoon mirroring your shocked expression. The tattoo artists looked at you in confusion, not getting what the big fuss was about. You lightly backhanded Namjoon on the chest, “Our theory’s plausible.”

“What theory?” Jungkook cut in. He wasn’t too worried about the case at first, but now that there were mentions of underground drug deals, he felt a bigger threat lurking around in the shadows. He just wants to be left alone - doesn’t want to lose the shop he risked everything for. 

“Hoseok and Minho are the same guy. We don’t have enough evidence to prove this, but we’ll continue to dig into it. The drugs, the blurry photos, Minho rarely seen outside and when he is, he’s always wearing a mask - these all scream fishy to me,” you paused to slide the pictures back into the folder, returning it into your bag. 

Taehyung slurped noisily on his iced tea. “This is some Scoobydoo shit.” He tapped his fork on his plate, confused to be met with the clinking of silverware. Bread crumbs and smears of strawberry jam greeted him, making him pout. Tugging Jungkook’s sleeve, he pointed his fork at his empty plate. “I’m all out.”

“Jesus Christ,” Jungkook rolled his eyes. He dug his credit card out his wallet for the nth time and placed it on Taehyung’s side. The older boy looked expectantly at him. “Well?”

“Can’t you buy it for me?”

“Oh my god-”

“I’ll buy it for you,” you smiled endearingly at Taehyung. He grinned back at you, a mischievous glint in his eyes. Jungkook stilled, an unreadable expression on his face. Without waiting for him to respond, you stood up, leaving the table and stood in line at the counter. 

To your surprise, Jungkook followed after you, taking his place behind you in line. “You don’t have to. He’s already spent over 30 000 won on pastries, and it’s only been two hours.”

“Oh come on, you’re acting as if we weren’t close back in high school,” you froze, realizing how wrong your words might have sounded. Back then, you could read him like an open book. Knew exactly what would set him up, where his boundaries were. But now, it was like walking on eggshells around him. 

“Yeah,” he mumbled, cheeks pink. “Maybe I should cut you some slack,” he said more to himself than to you.

"Yeah," you mimicked him. "Maybe you should."

"Seriously. I appreciate it. I appreciate you taking the case even after what happened between us back then," But the thing is, you didn't know it was him in the first place. It was unfair for him to think so highly of you. You knew you didn't deserve his kind words. Jungkook didn't change a bit - he was still shit at holding grudges. 

°°°

6 years ago

"Where are you?" Jungkook sobbed into the phone. Taehyung peered at him worriedly from the living room. The walls of his small dorm were thin, and Jungkook's side of the conversation was enough for him to piece together what you two were arguing about. "You promised."

"Tell her I'll come with you," he said, after a minute of silence. "I'll even work for her. I'll take the job offer she gave me. Please don't leave me."

He was so close to tearing his hair out. It's been a week since he last talked to you - you've been ignoring his calls and texts, Taehyung didn't know where you were, or if he did, he wasn't telling, and even your father hadn't been responding to him. And now you finally emerge from wherever the hell you've hidden in, telling him you were set to go to college in the States. 

"The job offer's gone, Kook. You're too late. My mom already booked the ticket, paid for my tuition. I can't turn back now," You were packing your bags back in Daegu. Taehyung's family was nice enough to let you stay for a few days until you were ready to go. Taehyung, along with your father, had explained your situation to them, and they were more than willing to help - though hesitant at first since they were also close to Jungkook. 

"Why are you hiding from me? Just tell me where you are. At least talk to me properly, please  ___," He kept walking in circles around the room, thinking of anything he could do. He felt so utterly helpless, sick to his stomach. "Please."

"At least tell me where you are!" He shouted into the phone. His mind was in a frenzy. Taking his wallet, he paid Taehyung no attention and ran out of the apartment, wearing only a t-shirt and jeans to protect him from the cold.

Taehyung ran after him, stopping him just before he could get into the subway. His phone was still in his hands, though you had already stopped talking on the other line. You brought the phone speaker away from your mouth, trying your best to muffle your sobs. He was still on the other and, yelling, pleading, begging to know where you were. At the back of your mind, your mother's words still echoed.

"You have no future with him, ___. He has nothing. No proper ambitions, no practicality, no sense of reality. He is weighing you down. If he wants to waste his potential, then that's on him. But he is not going to do the same to my daughter."

Taehyung was holding him back, trying to convince him to go back to his dorm. In the end, he dragged Jungkook back into the warmth of his room. The call was still ongoing, both ends of the line going silent until you finally ended it - along with your two-year relationship.

°°°

"So we're friends again?" you gave him a lopsided grin, offering your hand out to him. Guilt squeezed your heart. 

"Yeah," he looked away for a moment, pretending to be interested in the menu. He brought his hands together, twiddling his thumbs, before murmuring. "I missed you, ___."

When you came back, Taehyung kept staring at you, a suggestive smile on his face. You brushed him off, praying Jungkook didn't notice it too. The older boy traded - rather, forced to trade - seats with Namjoon, in favor of sitting next to you. A fresh plate of pastries sat in front of him, though his interest was on you alone. 

"I see you and Jungkookie are finally getting along," he whispered the moment Jungkook was distracted by Namjoon's relentless questioning. 

You rolled your eyes, elbowing him. "We're back to being friends. I'm just glad things aren't that awkward anymore."

"Took you a while to get off your high horse," he muttered, though his tone was playful. You still didn't get how he seemingly manages to brush everything under the rug. 

°°°

6 years ago

"___, you're hurting him," Taehyung hissed, keeping his voice low to not wake Jungkook up. He took a cautious glance around the place, sensing the younger boy was still asleep. "I didn't sign up for this. You told me you were only going away for four years. Why the fuck aren't you coming back?"

"I will come back," It was midnight. You were supposed to be sleeping. Instead, you were standing in the middle of the Kims' strawberry farm. Everything reminded you of Jungkook - his love for strawberries, his fascination with nature. Above you, the moon gazed upon the earth, accompanied by millions of blinking stars. And somewhere under that same moon, was the boyfriend you neglected.

"I just need a few years. Law school is not that easy, Tae. And I just can't go straight back there after I graduate. I need to work, I need to at least make a name for myself."

"I understand you don't want to disappoint your parents. I really do. What did you think I felt knowing my brother and my sister were aiming to be an engineer and a doctor, while I was going to take on a fucking arts course?" he took a deep breathe, forcing himself to calm down. "I know Jungkook doesn't have the most conventional dream out there, but at least explain everything to him. I can't see him hurting anymore."

"I did explain everything. "

"Telling him you were going abroad after ignoring him for one whole week isn't explaining, ___!"

"He won't understand! I'm only going to hurt him more," you ran a hand through your hair, the knotted mess getting pushed back. "I'll call him again by the time I'm in America."

"You better. I know I helped you because you were my friend, but he's my friend too. He's my best friend. And let me tell you, he is feeling depressed, ___. Your boyfriend is hurting because of you. At least be aware of that," Without another word, Taehyung ended the call.

You stared at the endless fields of strawberries and trees in front of you. Some of the leaves were already starting to brown in preparation for autumn. Not that you'll still be in Korea by the time it comes.

°°°

"So, what made you change your mind about her?” Taehyung was hunched over the arcade game, eyes stuck on whichever character he was beating to a pulp. The three of them were closing up shop. Jimin was still tidying up the customer lounge, while Jungkook and Taehyung waited for him in the employee room. Jungkook was on the other side, concentrating on designing a tattoo commission. 

“What do you mean?” he didn’t spare the older boy a glance. He was getting frustrated with this particular design. He had already gone through half a stack of paper just trying to get it right, and none of the sketches he has done so far looked right. 

“I mean-” he paused, letting out a grunt when he lost a round. “The first time you saw her again, you wouldn’t even talk to her. And before that, you wouldn’t even talk about her.”

“She’s our lawyer now. Of course I have to talk to her.”

“No, what I’m saying is- ah shit!” he slammed his hand onto the side of the machine. “Why the fuck won’t I jump? What the fuck?!”

“As I was saying,” he continued after putting in another token. “Yeah, she’s our lawyer and we have to be cooperative for obvious reasons. But I don’t know, you were different at the cafe. First of all, you bought me some food - which you never do.”

“Rarely do,” Jungkook corrected, pencil continuing to scrape on the paper. 

“Same thing. And you were giving her all these soft looks. Like a puppy or something.”

“I was?” Jungkook’s eyes widened, abruptly halting his sketching process. Taehyung had his full attention now. “Was I really, Tae? Honestly? If I was, do you think she noticed?”

“Maybe. I dunno. She looked really focused on the evidence folder and shit. But yeah, anyone could tell you missed her just by seeing the way you look at her. It’s kinda like the way you used to look at her back when you two were...” Taehyung never finished the sentence. Instead, the sound effects from the arcade game filled the room. Taehyung knew just how far he could touch that area, and not once did he cross the line; he still didn’t know if it was safe or not.

“You can’t keep hating her forever.”

“I don’t hate her.”

“Well then, you can’t keep holding a grudge against her. I know what she did to you was utterly hurtful. I was there to witness shit hitting the fan. But you know, you’re bad at holding grudges. Especially against someone who was a big part of your life. I’m not saying you still love her. I’m just saying, you can’t...” After what felt like an eternity, Taehyng pulled out a chair and sat beside him. “You can’t pretend like you’re not getting affected by any of this. You get me?”

The older boy sighed, grabbing Jungkook by the wrist to stop him from sketching. “If you stopped living in total denial, you would realize that you’ve stopped designing the tattoo, and instead, have been sketching her for the past 15 minutes.”

Jungkook straightened up in his chair, getting a better look at the paper. There, in fact, was a messy, but distinguishable sketch of your face. Before he could react, a brown paper bag was plopped onto the papers. 

“I re-heated some grilled cheese and double-locked the back door. We’re good to go,” Jimin leaned one of the chairs next to Jungkook. He bunched up the papers and shoved them into his bag before Jimin could see. 

“We’re good to go,” he repeated.

The night was cold. There were only a few people in the streets, illuminated by the scattered lamp lights. The streets were damp - they didn’t even notice it rained. They walked in silence, both boys sensing the younger one’s dread. Not because he hated you, but because he didn’t know what to feel anymore. 

“It’s gonna be okay kid,” Jimin wrapped an inked arm around him. “You just need some closure, that’s all. Talk to her and see how it goes. If it turns out good, then it’s good. If it turns out bad, I have a friend over at the Naughty Bunny who can get us inside without having to wait in line.”

Jungkook chuckled, thinking about all the times Jimin came to work with a pounding headache and love bites all over his neck. He shook his head, “Thanks for the offer hyung, but I have to pass. ___ might call for an emergency meeting and-”

He stopped abruptly, making the boys halt. Taehyung made a move to speak, but Jungkook waved him off, signalling for him to keep quiet. The older boys looked at each other in confusion. In the distance, just beneath the shadows of an alley next to Soliloquy, a tall figure hunched in front of the brick wall, fumbling with something in his hands. It was too dark to see, but Jungkook was sure it was him.

Without warning, he bolted towards the man, Jimin and Taehyung running after him. The figure took a second before noticing him, but by the time he went to run, he was already cornered. Jungkook grabbed him by the collar, slamming him against the wall. 

“Yah! Don’t run off like that you brat!” Jimin started scolding him. He didn’t even notice Taehyung tugging on his sleeve, muttering his name.

“Hyung. Hyung. Jimin. Jimin hyung. Jiminie.”

“What?” he asked, annoyed. Taehyung pointed at the boy in Jungkook’s hands, his eyes terrified, pupils blown out in such a way he knew he wasn’t sober. His hand hung limply, sluggishly trying to get Jungkook off him. There was the man himself - their greatest rival. “Son of a bitch-”

“Yah, Jung Minho, ” Jungkook said. “We have to talk.”

#jungkook x reader #jungkook #jungkook scenarios #jeon jungkook #bts #bts scenarios #bts smut #bangtan smut #jungkook imagines #bts imagines #bangtan scenarios #bts au