*James listening to Lily on the phone to Sirius mid-arguement*
Lily: oh fuck me!
*pause as Sirius speaks*
Lily: Sirius I'm a married woman
James: *grabbing the phone* Padfoot can you stop hitting on my wife for five bloody minutes?!
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finished the sunshine court..... kind of deranged and it wouldn't be aftg if it wasn't. absolutely had a great time even though jean spent most of his pov so miserable im pretty sure he invented at least 5 new dsm diagnoses. also im obsessed with cat and laila doing what renison couldnt back in 2016 a part of me is healed now. 10s across the board thank you nora
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Bruce Wayne, drunk and full on Brucie mood in the middle of a gala: You know, that accent doesn’t really fit in around here. It’s cute. Where are you from?
Clark, internally debating every life choice that led him to this moment: I’m from Smallville. Kansas.
Bruce, leaning closer to Clark with a flirty smile: Oh you’re cute and funny. You know, I like that in a man.
Clark, very confused but trying to just go along with it: Thank you??
Bruce: I mean, everyone knows that Kansas isn’t real but I do always enjoy a good laugh.
Clark: What.
Bruce: What? Everyone knows that Kansas was made up for Wizard of Oz.
Clark, unsure if Bruce is fucking with him or if he’s just really deep into this dumb act: Bruce, Kansas is a real place. It’s one of the 50 states that make up America.
Bruce, tilting his head a little confused: There’s 50 states? Since when?
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INGREDIENTS:
2 cups evil boredom
3 teaspoons (heaping) blorbo poison (powder, not liquid)
1 daycare theme (10 hour loop)
1/3 cup brainrot
*1/2 cup distilled back pain
**(un)diagnosed mental illness
*(any kind of pain works, back pain is usually what i have on hand)
**(if you aren’t a fan of the flavor a diagnosis leaves, undiagnosed will work in a pinch! Personally, I like to add a bit of both.)
INSTRUCTIONS:
First, turn on the daycare theme (10 hour loop) and pre-heat the oven to 375 degrees.
Sift together your evil boredom and blorbo poison in a medium sized bowl.
Add in your pain of choice and mix well.
Once thoroughly mixed, it should be looking a little thicker. Some granules from the evil boredom and blorbo poison are fine. (You can always mix further, if you’re worried about it affecting the texture.)
Add your brainrot and beat with a whisk until it’s looking lighter, a little fluffy. (If you aren’t in the mood for fluff, a dash of angst or hurt/comfort can help tone it down. An AU if you really wanna spice it up.)
Realize this is turning out a lot better than you thought it would. Dang. Well, you’re certainly committed now.
Go ahead and get out a glass baking pan. Coat the bottom with non-stick spray. (I tend to favor Y/N brand Nonbinary Spray myself)
Using a baking spatula (one of the rubbery bendy ones), carefully move your mixture from the bowl to the pan. It’s alright if you get some on the sides, the heat should help it settle once it’s in the oven. To get out any air bubbles, tap the pan (carefully!) a few times on the counter.
Place the pan in the oven and set a timer for 15-25 minutes, or take a peek every now and then and see if it’s the right shade of cheerful.
Congratulations!!! You’ve successfully survived evil boredom, despite the hurdles you faced, and made something! (Pretty tasty too, if I might add.) You are still mentally ill, though. But - hey - now you have a little treat! And hopefully, your day’s just a little bit brighter! Enjoy!
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Rook: Look at that splendidly ornate comb! Ahh! Magnifiqué! Trés, trés bien!! I--
Exhausted!Yuu: Oh my god, here we go again. Another TED talk today? You've already given 7.
Rook:..I beg your pardon?
Exhausted!Yuu: Everytime you open your mouth I get the urge to say, 'welcome to the comedy club!'.
Rook: Excuse-moi--
Exhausted!Yuu: I'm sorry but be glad you're not part of my world because there's a role in a show 25 years ago that's calling your name. I hope you like being Phoebe Buffay's ex, because you've been doing some damn good impressions since I got here.
Rook:...
Exhausted!Yuu: That's what I thought.
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