#bumps again since its the 12th here | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

headinthestaticsky · 3 years

Text

Extras for The Dusk Calls for me.

Authors Note: While I plan out the next few chapters of my story, enjoy these memories I did for the re-write I did on Wattpad.

TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions and a attempt of SA

Time: This Takes place a year before the beginning of The Dusk Calls for me.

"Makes me feel like flying

Top-down backstreet driving Dusty road all alone

Tip my hat Puff of smoke, smoke

Makes me feel like flying

I just run ."

American Gurl by: Kilo Kish

I was finally out, those words of bile my mother and sister spew toward me finally pushed me over the edge. Yet those words finally got me back with my father in Forks, where I always belonged.

Flashback: One Week Ago.

"FLEUR! GET DOWN HERE NOW!" My erratic mother Renee yelled from downstairs.

My heart started beating out of my chest, what did I do this time? I walked into the dining room, Renee and Isabella were sitting at the table across from where I was sitting. Bella had a smirk on her face relishing in the tension between Renee and I.

"Yes?" I asked.

"You always have to cause trouble don't you?' She replied back, malice laced her voice.

"What? What are you even talking about?"

"Bella told me you've been saving money to go see your father in Forks." She spat at me.

My rapidly beating heart sunk down into my stomach, I had been trying to see my dad in Forks for a year now. My mother refused to get me a plane ticket herself, she always told me I reminded her too much of my father and that I didn't need to be around him anymore than I already was which wasn't often.

"Mother, it's my money I can do with it as I please," I said calmly though I could feel the rage beginning to boil in my blood.

"YOU AREN'T GOING!" She yelled demandingly.

I couldn't control myself, it was as if someone else had entered my body.

"WHAT IN THE HELL IS SO WRONG FOR WANTING TO SEE MY FATHER!?"

"I'M NOT GOING TO WASTE THAT KIND OF MONEY ON YOU!"

"Well you aren't now aren't you? It's my own money and I will use it however the hell I want to!"

"Oh don't you..." Renee started.

"Are you going to tell me you would be doing the same thing if Bella was the one wanting to go see dad?"

"She isn't a trouble maker." She snapped back.

"How am I a trouble maker? For wanting my mother to be kind and considerate? For wanting my mother to treat me with respect? To get an ounce of love from the frozen, undead heart inside your chest?" I asked, my face heated up it felt like it was burning.

"If you can't stand to be around us so much why don't you just move down there to Forks?"

"I will, just give me the rest of the money for the plane ticket and I swear to god the second I walk out that door I will NEVER come back!"

"Fine..." I turned away from her before she could say anything else. Before I reached the stairs I turned around again, looking directly at Bella.

"Get away from her while you can Isabella, or you're going to end up being just as toxic as she is." I then left before they could say anything else.

Flashback over: 2 years before the Original story begins.

I looked to the side, staring out the window. The desert plains had disappeared while I slept and now the lush green forests overtook the view. The fog wasn't heavy but the skies were covered with dark grey clouds and a downpour of rain. The cold weather was a lot more favorable in my opinion, the sun couldn't burn my skin much here. The plane had begun to shake signaling that the plane was beginning to land. I couldn't wait to see my father again, I hadn't seen him since my 12th birthday. When I got off the plane I stretched, being cramped in a small plane for an almost 3-hour flight wasn't exactly the most comfortable.

I walked through the crowded airport, scanning the area for my father. I bumped into some disgruntled couples and quickly left before I was caught in the crossfires of their mood.

"Petal?" I heard from behind me. I turned around quickly recognizing that voice, it could calm me down before I got into trouble.

"Dad..." I said fondly before running up to hug him.

My heartfelt I little more full, and the pain my mother inflicted on me was healed for the time being. We walked out together, each of us was carrying a bag. The wind was strong today and my hair was flying all of the places. Its cooling touch raised goosebumps on my skin, mom didn't buy any warmer clothes for me so I was stuck in the typical Arizona tank tops and shorts. Luckily for me, the car was already warmed up so I dethawed quickly. We drove for a few minutes in silence, the roar of the engine and other passing cars were the only sounds filling the space.

"So, how have you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in a while." Dad said.

"I've been better, you know how mom is," I mumbled.

"I don't know what happened to her, she wasn't like that in high school. If she was I wouldn't have even wasted a second on her."

"I know you would've dad...she's cruel for sure. She's just good at hiding it from people she wants to impress."

"Yeah, she is."

The drive was a giant wave of nostalgia, being 16 now and seeing all of the familiar sites and views brought back fond memories. The old ice cream shop dad use to take me to, the reservation that Sam and Leah lived on, it all brought me back. It also fueled anger, however, as my mother constantly kept me under the brutal radiation of the sun. Dad must've seen the look on my face and put his hand on my shoulder.

"It's going to be okay Petal, you're away from her now." He comforted.

"It's not just her dad... Bella's acting like her too."

"That's a shame... it really is."

"Yeah... it is." I sighed.

"I just can't wait to get back home, the attic is calling for me."

Dad chuckled before speaking again.

"You know... I heard you just got your license... So I got you an older car."

"You did not have to do that dad."

"It doesn't get in until next week, so I'll have to drive you to school until then," Dad said as if that would balance out the fact he got me a car.

"That's fine dad. What is it?"

"It's an old Mustang, a Fastback."

"Thank you, dad..."

"No problem Petal.

When we pulled into the driveway of our small but beautiful home the nostalgia fully set in. The colors were exactly the same, and the grass was just as muddy and dead as before.

"Well I cleared off some shelves for you in the bathroom, your room was a bit dusty so I just cleaned it for you," Dad explained as he helped me take my luggage upstairs.

"Sounds good, thank you again, dad, I love you."

"Love you too Petal." He kissed my head before closing the door behind me. The room was bare, I would have to fix it later on. I collapsed on my bed, facing the ceiling.

"I'm home."

September 17th, 2004.

"Dad I have to go, I don't want to be late on my first day!" I exclaimed throwing on a leather jacket.

"Petal I am almost ready, I never knew you were so much of a bookworm." He joked, ruffling my hair.

"Dad I am an entire school year ahead of where I should be... I take my education very seriously." I said, trying to hide the growing smirk on my face.

"Alright alright let's go," Dad said, taking my arm and pulling me out the door.

We were only driving for a little bit when I decided to roll the window down, I placed my arms on where the window used to be and rested my head on them. My hair blew out of my face and the cool mist of Forks hit me. When we arrived at the school dad was scanning the parking lot looking for a place to park when he passed right by a group of people. They were all gorgeous, their faces seemingly perfectly sculpted, and they all had the same colored eyes, golden. My eyes locked with one however, they were filled with pain for a second before melting into shock. something strange filled my chest and my heart began to race. As we drove past them I gave him a smile, hoping to ease his shock.

Timeskip: September 30th, 2004

Something was up, the boy I saw outside that window, Jasper Hale was more than what he seemed. He was freezing cold all the time, and I swore I saw his eyes turn black for a split second when he saw a boy from another make a gesture toward me. It was strange really, we had been friends for a few weeks but he seemingly had a protective...energy over me. But at the same time, I still felt something... I couldn't explain it. It was as if we were connected to each other in some way. My dad had to take my car to the shop and he couldn't pick me up today so I decided to take a trip to the library, hoping to find some new material to read.

I didn't realize how long I had been in the library until I looked out of the small windows of the building. The sky was darkened and daylight was running out, I checked out a few books and left not wanting to be stuck walking in the night. I was a few blocks home when I heard 3 men talking behind me.

"Oh looks at this one..."

"She seems perfect for us."

"Come here girly... we just want to talk."

My heart raced and my pace quickened, speed walking home. I tried taking weird turns and cuts but they wouldn't fall for the bait. I decided to run for it hoping my legs would be quick enough to evade them all. I was then pushed against the wall 2 minutes into my escape again, the smell of alcohol made me want to retch.

"You aren't very good at listening to orders." One murmured, his face was inches away from me, he breathed in my scent and began to chuckle.

"Don't be too hard on her... I like ones that fight." Another said

"Make this easy on yourself girl..."

One reached down to take off my clothes when he was suddenly thrown back a few feet into the air. I just stood against the wall shocked, I saw Jasper standing over the man before making his way over to the other two men. They both took off leaving their "friend" behind but Jasper zoomed toward them. His speed was inhuman and his strength was unprecedented yet I couldn't stop myself from moving from my spot. The other two men were flown into the air and scream on impact. Jasper grabbed them both by the throats.

"If you EVER try to touch her or any woman for that matter like that again... I. will. kill. you!" He growled before releasing them down on the ground. They gasped and ran again, babbling in terror toward one another.

Jasper walked toward me with a guilty look on his face, his hand reached out for mine and I took it without even thinking.

"Come with me Darlin' I have a lot to explain to you." He said softly, his mood had completely changed with me.

We walked for a few moments in silence, I side-eyed him for any shift in behavior, when it didn't I decided to interrogate him.

"How did you do that?" My voice trembled.

He sighed before replying.

"I'm a vampire." He said blatantly.

I looked at him and laughed thinking it was a joke... when he didn't join I stopped and looked at him with shock.

"You're serious?" I said, my eyes widening again.

"Yes I am, I've been 17 for...141 years. I got changed during the Civil War."

"Damn... you're old... wait were you in the Civil War?"

"Yes, I was drafted to the Confederate Army when I was 17..."

"Yikes..."

"You're telling me, I ran away the first chance I got... I wasn't going to fight in some war that was fueled by warped and disgusting ideas just because I was forced to. I never thought the way they did... I never understood why someone could think so low of a human being just because of his skin."

"That's very brave of you."

"I had just made it to Galveston when I decided to take a break... I ended up on a beach... that's when I ran into an immortal named Maria. She was creating an army and decided that I would be a good fit for it."

"She changed you against your will?"

"I didn't even know what she was doing until I felt searing pains from my arms all the way up to my neck." He explained rolling up his sleeves and showing me his scars."

I traced the teeth marks on his forearm before looking up at him again.

"I'm sorry that happened to you..."

He looked up at me in shock.

"You... you feel sympathy for something like me? I'm a monster..." He said sincerely.

"It wasn't even your choice as to what you became... and I don't think a monster would've saved me back there. Face it, Jasper, you're a big softie who's had bad experiences in his long... long life."

He chuckled before glancing at me, we made it back to the house, dad still wasn't home yet. We walked into the backyard, sitting in patio chairs and looking up at the stars.

"There's something else I have to tell you." Jasper admitted in the darkness.

I looked at him in confusion, what else did he have to tell me? He's a werewolf too?

"You're..." He hesitated. "You're my mate." He said quickly.

"What? How... vampires have mates?" I asked in shock.

"Yes we do, and we instantly know when we've met them. Didn't you feel it, when you looked out that window at me? It was enamour... love, something I have never experienced before."

"I haven't either... but I have to admit I felt something too. I just didn't know what it was, I felt connected to you somehow though. But... I'm 16... falling deeply in love isn't exactly something I planned."

"I understand completely. I won't force you to do anything you don't want to do. I understand I am a vampire... this is a lot to take in." Jasper said lowering his head in shame, his curls covered his eyes.

I sat up and turned to him.

"Hey, hey it's not just because you're a vampire honest! I just need to think things through... we can still talk in and out of school I won't push you out." I said a bit faced-paced. I didn't want to hurt his feelings he did just save me after all.

He looked and me and grabbed my hand.

"Take all the time you need Fleur, I will accept your answer no matter what is it." He said sincerely.

"Thank you... Jasper."

"It's not any trouble." His face lit up all of the sudden, car headlights entered my line of view. I felt my hand by dropped by his cold one and a whoosh of wind flew my hair forward. I turned back around and he was gone.

Timeskip: October 16th, 2004.

It was hard, weighing the pros and cons of being with Jasper.

Pros: We were soulmates... destined to be with each other, He knew my limits and respected my boundaries, he gave me a choice, not forcing me into something I might not want to do, and he was a kind and gentle soul. We understood each other, our hearts and souls were connected and I would never find someone else I would be so close to.

Cons: He was a creature who thirsted for blood... a thirst he didn't always have the best control over, Being in a serious relationship at such a young age was a huge commitment I didn't even fully know who I was... would I ever be able to find out who I am being so committed to someone If I did become involved in a relationship two things would happen... I would die and leave him lonely for eternity, or I would be turned into a vampire... leaving my family behind.

My mulling over of the pros and cons was interrupted, a girl had cleared her throat. I looked up realizing I was still in the school library, standing in the back of the constant isles of books. I turned to the voice and my eyes were shocked to see Rosalie Hale looking at me.

"Rosalie? Is there something you need?" I asked.

"Let's go for a walk, I need to talk to you in private." She said she seemed tense about something.

I checked out the books I got before following her to the outside, we walked near the edge of the woods. The dead leaves and grass crunched underneath our feet.

"I know Jasper told you about us... and he told me that you wanted to think somethings over with him." She started.

"Hey... I just wanted to let you know I would never tell anyone about you guys... And I'm not trying to hurt Jasper with me thinking our relationship over. It's just a lot of process." By the time I finished that statement she laughed and patted my shoulder.

"Don't worry Fleur I completely understand why you want to think over some things... I would too if I were in your shoes. Besides, I trust you... I get a good vibe off of you." Rosalie replied smiling at me.

"I want to get into a relationship with Jasper I do but... I don't want to leave my father... he's all I got right now and I'm all he's got."

"Hey, I promise no one would force you into becoming a vampire in our family... I especially wouldn't force you to."

"Really?"

"Yes of course... It's nice to meet someone with a respect for mortality."

"It's just... I always to do certain things... like going to that art school in Cayon City Oregon... the Art Museums down there are amazing... and I always wanted to kid when I was older... a little boy." I explained smiling fondly at the thought.

"I did too... I always wanted a son."

"But at the same time... I wouldn't want to spend all my time with Jasper... only to leave him alone for eternity you know?" I asked her hoping she would get my point of view.

"Of course... I can tell you've been conflicted these past few weeks about it. But I wanted to vouch for Jasper... he's willing to do anything for you, and his thirst for blood has never been more controlled than when he's been with you. He won't take you away from your family either... he would never want to hurt you in any way possible." She explains turning toward me to look me in the eyes so the message could really sink in.

"Thanks, Rosalie..."

"Of course...give Jasper a chance, I promise it'll be worth it." She said.

"I will... I'll talk to him tonight, thanks for the guidance."

"No problem."

Timeskip: October 16th, 2004: 10:12 PM

Dad was gone, he had to work late down at the station tonight. My palms and legs shook nervous to tell Jasper my decision. I was sitting in the same spot I was in when Jasper told me I was his soulmate... the cool air calmed my nerves slightly before I closed my eyes and sighed.

"Fleur? You said you wanted to talk to me... are you okay?" Jasper's voice asked worryingly behind my closed lids.

"Yeah, I'm fine... I just wanted to give you an answer about... everything."

He sat down adjacent to me and nodded, wanting me to continue.

"I will get into a relationship with you... thank you for giving me the time to think about things."

He smiled before asking me if he could kiss my cheek. I said yes of course and it seemed my body melted in bliss and content. All the past weeks' tensions and worrying left me and it was replaced with love... and a sense of stability. We looked up at the stars and I pointed toward the largest one in the sky.

"You see that one?" I said.

"Yes, I do Darlin'."

"That is the star of the path I started with you..."

#twilight saga #twilight #jasper whitlock x oc #jasper hale x reader #jasper hale x oc #jasper whitlock #jasper cullen #jasper hale #jacob black #esme cullen #edward cullen #carlisle cullen #alice cullen #rosalie hale #Emmett Cullen #bella swan

25 notes · View notes

blueberrysets · 3 years

Photo

EXPLORING SONGS: HOW THE SUN TEMPTED ME

pairing: timeskip!tsukishima x f!reader

genre: fluff and angst, hurt/comfort

warnings: swearing, mentions of death, mentions of alcohol use, depression, grief, angst

word count: 3,343

summary: after the death of his best friend, tsukishima swore to never speak a word about that night and to not even mutter his name again. he would rather stay angry at himself for the rest of his life than to think about that incident. yet, it haunts him in his dreams and in his every day to day life. until the lovable roommate of his seems to show more care towards him than anyone else in his life.

song to play: fine line by harry styles

an: yay!! this is my first installment in my writing collection of exploring songs! I’m super excited to keep writing for this and diving deep into the lyrics of the music. I hope you enjoy and let me know if you would like to be in the tag list for future installments!

masterlist!

taglist: @emiyummy @nyelsy

In the five stages of grief, tsukishima seems to be stuck on the second stage; anger. He’s been that way for the past four years since he lost his best friend. it’s a relentless anger that is directed to anyone who happens to irritate him just slightly. he finds himself having to hold his tongue while an annoying little kid asks him a dumb question while he’s explaining fossils. he used to love their curiosity and would lend a hand to teach them. his anger starts at the bottom of his feet, flowing all the way up to the middle of his throat. having him choke slightly at the ball of frustration blocking his airways.

yet the one thing he can’t get rid of, is his annoying lovable roommate.

“tsukki!” her voice rings out, bouncing off the walls of the bustling museum. her arms stretched way above her head as she waves him down, a bright smile lighting up her face as her cheeks and the tip of her nose are rosy from the winter air outside.

tsukishima finds the corners of his mouth raising slightly at the sight. it’s not a new one, she’s always there for his lunch break so they can eat together. always making food and coming to his work with a bento that has his name on it. the slight smile stays for a second, but is soon replaced with his familiar scowl. he makes his way over to her, hands shoved in his khaki pants. his worker ID hanging around his neck on a lanyard, irritating the back of his neck and bumping against his dark brown sweater.

her office attire is covered by a long, black peacoat and a thick, tan scarf paired with it. her hands lower as he gets closer to her, but her smile doesn’t falter. the familiar big purse filled with the contents of their lunch is hanging off her shoulder, the same color as her scarf. she calls it her “mom purse,” stating how she can literally carry anything in there. if only he could take his grief and place it in there as well.

“look at you,” tsukishima snickers, “finally dressing appropriately for the weather.”

a look of annoyance replaces her smile, he feels himself missing it already. her hand winds back to land a slap right onto his bicep. he couldn’t help but laugh even more at her reaction. it’s fun to tease her, especially when she gets pouty.

“keep saying stuff like that and i’ll stop making you lunches,” she grumbles as she sticks her tongue out at him.

“you and i both know you won’t,” he shrugs.

“shut up, i hate when you’re right,” she mumbles again, pushing the straps of her purse higher up on her shoulder as she walks to where his break room is.

a hearty laugh leaves his lips as his head is thrown back. his shoulders rising up and down as the laugh takes over his body. it stops y/n in her place to look back and take in the sight. seeing the pure joy covering his face as he laughs, it's a sight she doesn’t want to miss. so, she halts in her tracks and admires him. but before he could notice, she turns back around and continues her way to the break room. but how odd was it, to know that he only laughs that genuinely around her.

the clicking sound of her heels now echo off the walls, and he follows the noise all the way to the familiar staff break room. she clunks her purse down on the dull, wooden table that sits in the middle of the room. to the left of it is a kitchenette area with counters, a refrigerator, microwave, coffee maker, and sink. to the right are various vending machines and printers. she places the two bentos and two pairs of chopsticks onto the table before dropping her bulky bag next to her chair. she unravels her scarf and shrugs off her coat before hanging them on the back of her chair.

it’s annoying how frustratingly beautiful she is, without even trying. her black skirt fits her curves nicely and goes great with her favorite maroon turtleneck sweater. the black tights that cover her skin from the cold air transition nicely into her black high heel boots. her hair in its natural state as her face is adorned with work-suited make up. yet, his favorite look on her would have to be the casual clothes she lounges in at home.

he takes his usual seat across from her, sitting down and grabbing the chopsticks that were set nicely next to his bento box. he breaks them apart before unwrapping and opening his meal. but stops his movements to see her loosely putting her hair into a bun before she eats. stating that it keeps it from annoyingly falling in her face as she eats, another habit that he can’t seem to stop gushing over. they sit in silence as they start to eat, it’s a comfortable silence. one that is usually filled with the humming from the printer.

“how’s work been today?” she asks with her mouth slightly full, her gaze on her food as she continues to shovel it into her mouth.

“the usual, how about you?” he softly asks as he picks at his food, “is that greg guy still bothering you? you know i can sort that out for you.”

she lets out a snort, setting her chopsticks down as she wipes her hands on her skirt. chewing her food completely and swallowing before she replies.

“i’m a big girl, I can handle it,” she states in a sassy manner, her gaze meeting him from across the table, “but no, he’s not.”

“good,” he answers shortly, briefly meeting her gaze before it’s redirected back down to his food.

she clears her throat as she picks up her chopsticks again, returning to quickly eating. their lunch time together is short as she has to catch another train back to her office in a different part of the city. he’s told her multiple times that she doesn’t have to do this, that he’s perfectly capable of having lunch by himself. but she insists, and he’s glad that she still does. perhaps, he doesn’t like being alone.

“i can’t believe it’s already december 12th,” she mumbles, mostly to herself, “it’s getting close to christmas, i’m not even done shopping yet.”

while the statement of the date is an innocent remark, it stills has tsukishima freezing his movements as the breath gets caught in his throat. he slowly places his hands back down on the table and slightly pushes the bento box away from him, no longer hungry.

well, it’s official.

today marks five years since his best friend's death.

“tsukki,” her voice breaks through to his ears as his eyes snap open and his body being shaken by her, “tsukki!”

his breathing is rigid as his hands grip onto her arms, the covers thrown off of him as he feels the hot tears streaming down his face. his eyes scan his surroundings in his semi dark room, the only source of light being his bedside lamp. his glasses are placed on the bedside table and his clock shows that it’s currently 1:23 am. then his eyes finally land on her.

her hair messy from her bed head and her eyes holding a look of concern. her hands slide from his chest up to his face, wiping away the tears that continue to fall from his eyes. he’s confused, throat dry and raw.

“you were screaming,” she whispers softly, one hand leaving his face as she runs it through his hair, “i think you were having a nightmare.”

it hits him. he was. memories of that fateful night replaying in his mind, over and over again. always the same outcome, always him being too late. he squeezes his closed, more tears leaving his eyes as does. yet the gentle touches from her hands wipe them away.

“do you want to talk about it?” she asks gently, causing him to slowly open his eyes to connect with hers.

he shakes his head no.

“that’s okay,” she nods, “whenever you want to, just know that i’m here. let me get you some water.”

she stands up, turning to leave to walk to the kitchen. his hand latches onto hers, stopping her from leaving. she turns around, her gaze soft as she looks down at their hands then back to his face. he swallows, this is very out of character for him. but he doesn’t want to be alone.

“will you stay with me?” he gasps out, shyly lowering his gaze, “just for the night.”

her thumb caresses his hand before she gives it a gentle squeeze.

“of course, i’ll stay for as long as you need,” she coos, “let me get you water, then i’ll come to bed.”

he nods his head, releasing his grip on her hand. she turns and walks out of the room, her bare feet padding on the hardwood floor. the sound fades out as he is left with his own thoughts again. he lays back down on the bed, running a hand through his hair. his eyes dry from the tears and his head throbbing for some sleep. yet he can’t go to sleep, he doesn’t want to see it again. he can’t keep seeing that night again. it’ll tear him apart more than it already is.

before his thoughts could get even more jumbled together, she finally returned with a glass of fresh water. she sets it on his nightstand before crawling into bed next to him, pulling the covers up with her. he turns over to grab the cup, taking a few sips to soothe his throat. he sets it back down and turns off the lamp. he flops back down onto his back. a hand laying underneath his head as he stares at the moonlight leaking in through his window. then he feels her, her arm thrown over his waist as her head lays on his chest and her legs tangle with his.

his heart swells at the contact. it was at this moment, that he knew he could trust her with anything. despite his snarky remarks, silent grief, and witty attitude; she decided to stay with him. how lucky can one get?

“i’m not sure if i’m ready to fully tell you everything yet,” he explains softly, one of his hands drawing circles on her arm, “but just know that things would’ve been different if i was there before…”

“nonsense,” she cuts him off, her face still buried in his chest, “fate works in mysterious ways, kei. sometimes it does shit that seems so unfair, so heartbreaking. we can’t help but blame ourselves sometimes. yet, it’s not your fault. things happen for a reason whether we like it or not. you could’ve prevented it then, but who's to say it wouldn’t just happen later on? stop being so hard on yourself, instead take time to heal from whatever hurt you.”

another tear falls at her words, but god how relieving it was to be on stage three; bargaining.

he was so tired of being angry.

“i’m going out!” he remembers her saying as she struggles to pull her high heel onto her foot, “don’t wait up for me, i’ll text you when i’m on my way home!”

yet it’s morning, and there was no text. no call, no text from her friends; there's just nothing. he paces the living room, frantically calling her number over and over. his hair a mess with how many times his hands had run through it. his pajamas fitting loosely on his skinny body, he has lost some weight hasn’t he?

“pick up, pick up,” he whispers to himself as his bottom lip is being nervously gnawed at, “y/n pick up, damnit.”

voicemail, again. he aggressively pushes the red button to hang up, harshly throwing his phone onto the couch. he grips the edge of the sofa, his foot tapping anxiously as he tries to wrack his brain around what is happening. where was she? if she got hurt wouldn't he get a call from the hospital? or if it was something else, wouldn’t her friends or the police station call him? he is her emergency contact, he should be hearing something! what if she got kidnapped? maybe that’s why no one has told him anything. what if-

the sound of the front door being unlocked and opening interrupts his thoughts. he whips his head in the direction of the noise to see her walk in. she wears clothes that seem to be her friends as she holds her heels in her hand. she sets them on the ground gently, not wanting to make much noise so she doesn’t wake him.

“where the hell were you?” he asks loudly, causing her to jump from the surprise.

“oh!” she exclaims, “i spent the night at a friends place, but my phone died. sorry i didn’t text you.”

“you didn’t think of maybe having a friend text me?” he asks in a snarky tone, angrily walking over to her, “i was worried sick, y/n!”

“i’m sorry,” she laughs, “i didn’t think it would’ve been that big of a deal.”

“not a big deal?” he sneers, his hands gripping her biceps in a tight hold, “what if something happened to you, huh?”

“kei, let go,” she warns, “your grip hurts.”

“i can’t lose another important person, y/n!” he yells, taking in a sharp breath at what he just said.

“another?” she questions, her gaze more confused than angry now.

“forget it,” he mumbles as reaches behind her to grab his coat. shoving his feet into his shoes before walking out the front door, slamming it right in her face.

onto stage four: depression.

the last person he expected to see waiting for him at the end of his shift, would be her. her black peacoat contrasting with the red scarf wrapped around her neck. the scarf looking bulky against her frame, but comfortable. they haven’t had a conversation in two weeks, an awkward environment surrounds them since that morning. they kept to their assigned rooms in the apartment, yet she showed more compassion for him than he thought she would. she still set food outside his door, still packed him lunches, still did his laundry, or cleaned his room since he lacked motivation to do anything. opening his eyes felt like a chore lately, yet she still supported him silently.

“come with me,” she said softly, reaching a hand out to him, “i’m taking you somewhere.”

his eyes are wide, filled with curiosity and confusion at the current situation. yet he still reached his hand towards her mitten-covered one and held onto it. he let her pull him along with her. following her to the train station, sitting patiently for their stop, then following her off the train. their hands never once letting go. he was afraid that if he did, she would disappear in thin air. truly, leaving him completely alone.

she pulled him all the way to the beach, the waves slightly frozen as they crash into the rocky shores. she pulls him up onto a big rock ledge, sitting down once they reach the top. her legs dangling off the edge and the golden rays of the setting sun hitting her face. tsukishima was still standing, looking out at the perfect view of the sunset. but then averting his eyes to his own person sun sitting on the rock. he follows along and sits next to her, the harsh wind from the ocean hitting both of their faces.

“i asked your brother about what happened,” she states over the sounds of the waves, “about yamaguchi.”

he lets out a shaky breath at the mention of that name, one he promised himself he wouldn’t say. for his own sanity, he wouldn’t mention that name again.

“you did?” he asked quietly.

“i did,” she states confidently, “and i want to apologize.”

he rips his eyes from the view to look at her, meeting her gaze that was already on him. confusion written all over his face.

“i should’ve texted you that night, given you some indication of where i was. something to at least ease your mind,” she explains, her voice sounding like she was pleading for him to forgive her. all of this time, they both blamed themselves for the situation, “but i had no idea what you have gone through, but now that i do i completely regret my actions.”

tsukishima swallows hard as he looks down at his hands that rest in his lap. so she knows, and now she probably knows that he’s a huge fuck up. he took a few deep breaths, preparing himself for the conversation.

“how long have you known,” he starts, “about him.”

“about a week,” she whispers, “i didn’t have the heart to bring it up to you, i wasn’t sure how you would react. but then, i’ve seen the grief and guilt eating at you slowly. i can't stand to see you like that anymore, kei.”

“he called me,” he whispers, lifting his gaze up to her eyes. tears welling up in his eyes, “he called me that night asking for a ride, drunk. i remember that i was so annoyed by that call, that i didn’t leave right away. deciding that five more minutes of sleep was more important than my friend getting home safely. when i finally left and went to pick him up, the other guests said he left with someone else. then i get the call the next morning, the call that he was… well, you know.”

she scoots closer to him, placing her hands on his face. meeting his eyes with such intensity and care, he didn’t deserve her. the tears ran down his face, seeing who would get to the finish line the quickest. his body shakes from the sobs as he finally talks about that night after five years of avoiding it.

“this isn’t your fault, kei,” she says slowly, meaning every word.

“but if I just left right away-“

“he would’ve still had time to accept that ride,” she states, her eyes full of certainty, “he knew the risk, everyone does when it comes to alcohol. yet, he still said yes. he could’ve said no, you already told him that you would come pick him up. he left you, you didn’t abandon him.”

“i don’t deserve you,” he sobs out, “i really don’t. you’re like the sun, tempting me to be happy with what i did.”

“i’m not trying to make you feel happy about what you did,” she explains as she uses her mittened hand to wipe his tears, “i want you to accept that what happened, happened. there were mistakes made, yes, but you can't change it now. what you can do, is live in his memory. live life for him, and dedicate every waking day to him.”

“i love you,” he gasps out, “i really do, you sunshine. you temptress. so please, if i’m gonna do this i want you to be there with me.”

a smile breaks out on her face, laughing slightly. for once, his eyes weren’t full with the hardening gaze of sadness and guilt. but bright and full of love, and how she longed for that gaze to be shown her way.

“i’m not going anywhere, kei,” she smiles, “and i love you too.”

his arms wrap around her waist and pull her closer to him, lowering his head to capture her in a kiss. the sun is almost gone behind the horizon now, yet the glow from his own sunshine blinds him with love. tempting him to deepen the kiss as their grips on each other tighten.

he was right, he doesn’t like being alone.

it seems that he’s not anymore.

81 notes · View notes

stillbandofbrothersthirsty · 3 years

Text

As Far As Friends Go

This was kind of a transition chapter so cred’s to the show for the dialogue I used. But buckle up, shits really gonna go down next chapter.

Chapter 14 (Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3; Chapter 4; Chapter 5; Chapter 6; Chapter 7; Chapter 8; Chapter 9; Chapter 10; Chapter 11; Chapter 12; Chapter 13)

Nixon - June 1944

The drop into Normandy was perilous. Just as Nixon had feared, nothing seemed to go as planned. It was as if the Germans were waiting for them to arrive based off of how much fire they experienced. Nixon, like most of the men, missed his drop zone but he was lucky enough to quickly link up with Battalion headquarters. It was a chaotic couple of first days in France as the airborne got situated in relation to the troops on the beach. Early into their arrival, Winters and the available Easy Company men took down some German guns. This not only saved a number of lives on the beaches but produced a map detailing German artillery positions. Looking at it, Nixon realized how important it could be. It couldn’t wait, so he decided to run to Utah beach to hand the map over to the higher ups who could do something with it. The run to Utah was only three miles, no worse than he had experienced during training. He was grateful though that Command decided to send the first two tanks that landed in to aid the 101st, thus providing Nixon with a ride.

He greeted Winters with a cheeky smile when he returned to the assembly area. “Going my way?”

Winters tossed his gun up for Nixon to catch, “sure.”

The men bunkered down for the night, scrounging for what food and beds they could find. The Battalion was on the move by June 8th on their way to take Carentan. As according to plan, the 101st forced passage into Carentan on June 10th and 11th. The days were hot and muggy, barely cooling down at night for the men dressed in heavy uniforms and equipment. Bugs were everywhere and exhaustion was setting in. Finally, they encountered the Germans. On June 12th the German’s were forced to withdraw and it seemed like victory was theirs. But Nixon was suspicious. Surely the Germans wouldn’t give up such an important position so easily; and he was right. On June 13th the 17th SS PzG Division counter-attacked. Thankfully, the U.S. 2nd Armored Division came in for support.

When Nixon returned to Battalion headquarters with news of their victory he found that Emily had finally arrived.

“Emily!” he wanted nothing more than to hug her in that moment. The last week had been exhausting. It was such a comfort to see her.

“Miss me?” she grinned up at him. Her smile was like a shot of morphine, he immediately felt his muscles relax. “You look a mess,” she shook her head.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you, we’ve only been taking Carentan.”

“Congratulations,” she said, “did you like the tanks I sent you?”

Nixon looked at her flabbergasted. Then slowly, through the haze of his fatigue, he realized she was messing with him. “Ha ha. It would’ve been impressive if you had.”

“Yeah I wish, unfortunately I’m not that powerful yet.”

Nixon slung his arm around her neck, “no but I bet you know where to find me some food.”

Despite his exhaustion, Nixon didn’t sleep well those final weeks in Normandy. Instead, his alcohol intake increased. He had to re-fill his flask every day, sometimes topping it off throughout the day. He would need to replenish his stores soon. But no one anticipated how long they would actually be fighting in Normandy. In fact, the 101st had expected to be relieved much sooner. Strayer kept asking for patrols as the allies attempted to inch their way closer and closer to Germany.

Twenty-five days after D-Day Nixon was sent out on a patrol with Harry Welsh. It was a reconnaissance mission so Nixon was required to go. What they were looking for he wasn’t sure. The regiment had exhausted their knowledge of the German’s position in the area so any new piece of information could serve as an advantage.

Nixon peered through a pair of binoculars from where he and Welsh sat in the brush approximately 100 yards from a run down building. “We need to know what’s in there,” Nixon said.

“I don’t know who the hell to send,” Welsh said.

 “Ask for volunteers.”

“I hate asking for volunteers.”

Nixon gave Welsh a pointed look, “then pick them.”

Blithe, Martin, and Dukeman moved in towards the abandoned manor. The rest of the paratroopers sat hidden in the grass behind Nixon. As they waited for Blithe and the others to get into position Nixon spotted something poking out of Welsh’s backpack.

 “Harry, what exactly are you doing with your reserve chute? You been hauling that thing around since we jumped?”

Welsh sucked his teeth, slightly embarrassed he said, “gonna send it to Kitty when we get back to England. Silk, figure it’ll make a good wedding dress, ya know, what with the rationing and all.”

Nixon broke view of where the trio was moving in towards the manor to laugh at Welsh, “jeez Harry, I never would’ve guessed.”

“What? That I’m so sentimental?”

“No, that you think we’re going to make it back to England.” Nixon peered through his binoculars again. His mind flashed to Emily as he watched the men crouch down behind an upturned cart. Bad news, he thought. He had suspected for a while now that Emily may have feelings for Welsh, a man who clearly was intending on marrying his betrothed. No matter how much he flirted, Welsh wouldn’t have bothered lugging that extra chute around if he wasn’t serious about Kitty. Bad news for Emily. Suddenly, a shot rang out.

“Covering fire! Covering fire!” Welsh shouted. Martin and Dukeman pulled a downed Blithe back behind the line. They passed Nixon who saw the blood gushing from the young man’s throat before Doc Roe got to him.

“Cease fire! Cease fire!” Welsh commanded.

Winters moved up from behind, “what happened?”

“Sniper,” Nixon said coming up to him.

Winters couldn’t take his eyes off the bleeding Blithe, “they’re pulling us off the front line.”

“Now?” Nixon demanded.

Winters turned to him, “to a field camp north of Utah beach. Hot food, and showers.”

With a last mournful look at Blithe, Nixon turned away to head back. Great fucking timing, he raged to himself.

Emily was at the camp surrounded by intelligence staff and nurses, who were busy at work tending the masses of wounded men.

 “Nix?” her voice was gentle when he entered the intelligence tent.

“Couldn’t have let us know a little bit sooner? Sent the runner just a few minutes earlier?” he demanded.  

“What are you talking about?”

“We were on a patrol and some kid is probably gonna lose his life because that information came a few minutes too late! I sent them in there, I told them to check it out but turns out we didn’t need to!” Nixon pounded his fist on one of the tables.

“Lewis I didn’t know, that information didn’t come from me.”

“You’re intelligence staff! You’re meant to know!”

“I’m not intelligence staff like you are! I’m no S-2,” Emily shouted back, “no one tells me anything!”

Nixon paced the room trying to calm down, “okay, okay,” he leveled his hands on the desk, “I’m sorry. I just -,”

“It’s fine, I’m sorry too,” Emily stood across the table from him, looking small in the dim light of the tent. “I do know one thing,” she said. He looked up, waiting for her to continue, “we’re going back to England.”

“Right, great.” And he stormed out of the tent onto the beach.

His insomnia didn’t improve even knowing that they were going back to a relatively safe zone. It was impossible to sleep with the sounds of men crying out all around and bodies held together by gauze and tape only paces away. Naturally, the night before they were meant to leave, Nixon couldn’t sleep. He grabbed his flask and made his way towards the dunes on the far side of the camp.

He plopped down on a ridge into a bed of marsh grass, the coarse tendrils tickling his wrists and neck. Nixon closed his eyes and inhaled. The whiskey he had guzzled earlier that night had seeped pleasingly through his veins. The summer air blew across the salty water cooling the sweat where it pooled around his collarbone and lower back. It was so peaceful. If it weren’t for the peppering of tents barely visible against the night sky, Nixon could have pretended he was there on holiday and not for a war.

When he opened his eyes, he saw a lean figure making its way up the dune towards him. Nixon braced himself for the quiet wisdom of Winters. However, the figure failed to grow as it approached him, only reaching a height of about 5′5″. The silhouette revealed itself to be Emily, dressed in another pair of slightly oversized O.D.s.

“What?” Nixon barked at her.

“I saw you pass by,” Emily dropped down beside him, bumping his arm on her way down. Disgruntled, Nixon scooted over slightly.

“Why aren’t you asleep?”

“Why aren’t you?” Emily retorted.

“Couldn’t.”

  “Same here.”

Quiet fell between them, a comfortable quiet but Nixon could sense Emily wanted to say more. Finally, her lips parted and she said, “it’s not something you can get over.”

“What?”  

“Seeing the men like that.” Emily searched his face in the dark for any reaction. Nixon stared straight ahead. “It’s disturbing and not something anyone should ever have to witness.”

Nixon licked his lips to speak, but all that came out was, “yeah.”

Emily paused, then reached for his flask. She pulled it from his grasp and took a swig, “It’s over for now. We have to find comfort in that.”

“Right, some comfort in that,” he took the flask back for another drink. They sat there side by side listening to the waves crash against the shoreline. As the night waned on, Emily began to doze off. Her head fell to rest on his shoulder. Nixon considered waking her to walk her back to her tent but then decided against it. He didn’t want to disturb her. If she woke up now who knew if she would be able to fall asleep again. Besides, he enjoyed sharing a little sliver of the world with her in that moment. A sliver that was simple and not perverted by violence.

When the sun rose, she stirred and they both made their way back to their tents for a desperate last few hours of sleep before they were to ship off. As Nixon was boarding the ship he saw Emily standing on the Mulberry harbor hugging a dark, thin woman dressed in a nurses uniform. The woman brushed wild hairs away from Emily’s forehead then pressed something into her hand. Nixon couldn’t help but wonder what that exchange had been about. Out of curiosity, he met Emily at the gangway.   “Who was that?” he asked.

“Hm?” Emily pulled a paper wrapped candy out of her pocket.

“Who was that woman you were talking to? A nurse?”

“Oh yeah, that’s my friend Marwa.”

“I didn’t know you had female friends.”

Emily rolled her eyes and popped the candy into her mouth.

“What was that?” Nixon pointed to her mouth.

“Ginger candy, you want one?” Emily offered him a candy and Nixon accepted, beginning to feel like his old self again standing next to her.

#band of brothers #fanfiction #original character #as far as friends go #lewis nixon x oc #emily rooney #lewis nixon #harry welsh #dick winters #female cartographers #females in ww2

14 notes · View notes

strangeradventuresofp · 4 years

Text

emotions (klaus x reader)

We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals - 1

warnings : implied sexual assault, swearing

word count : 3984

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

A/N : hey so !!! i’ve wanted to write a canon fic for so long but it took me a while to establish a story line and i haven’t completely finished it yet but i hope you like this!! kinda long and it’s basically just the first episode as in introduction but i rly hope you enjoy it!!<3 xo p

On the 12th hour of the first day of October, 43 women around the world gave birth. This was unusual only in the fact that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began.

Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.

He got eight of them.

~~~

Your eyes flashed with horror as you looked down at the man in front of you, sprawled out on the path. His limbs were mangled and the pool of blood beneath him rapidly increased as it leaked out of his body. Glancing down, you noticed that upon your shaking hands were red stains, and your mouth turned dry while you walked away, shoving your hands in your pockets. Hopefully no one would find him, and if they did hopefully no one would find your fingerprints on his skin, after all, you didn’t even remember doing it. You felt bad, perhaps he didn’t deserve to die, only be injured. Your mind battled with itself as you remember how he had touched you and cornered you into the alleyway. How his fingers dragged and raked across your flesh and grabbed mercilessly at your clothing. He deserved it.

Murdering people wasn’t new to you. You had been forced to do it when you were a child, in an attempt to create an emotional disconnect from a young age. You didn’t hate doing it. Some people deserved it. You just hated that most times you didn’t know you had killed someone; you had lost control and adrenaline consumed your entire body and mind.

The door to your apartment faced you as you pulled up short, checking every pocket for your keys, trembling still as you managed to push them into the lock after numerous previous tries. You used your elbow to push the handle down, hauling open the door with your body weight, kicking it closed. The bag you carried dropped to the floor at the sound of the door closing, and you made straight for the bathroom, ready to wash away the awful day that you had had.

It wasn’t long before you stepped out of the shower, drying your body off and changing. A towel was still in your hands and you continued to pat down your hair as you trudged into your living room, feet grazing along the wooden floor. The noise of the TV droned in and out of your ears, combing through your dampened hair.

“…Little bit of rain potentially, later in the week…” The refrigerator door opened when you pulled it, your fingers reaching out for a carton of orange juice. The glass filled as you poured in the juice and began drinking from it.

“We’re going now live to a breaking story,” you lowered your glass from your lips before dragging your tongue across them, picking up what was left as you turned towards the TV. “Moments ago, police reported the death of the world’s most eccentric and reclusive billionaire, Sir Reginald Hargreeves.” Your heart startled at the words, and you felt unsure of whether to be relieved or not. Although he was your Father, he was never a Dad to you. He had created a robot, Grace, which you were expected to call Mom, and she looked after you, because Reginald could never be bothered. You often thought of what your ‘biological mother’ would be like and maybe you would have felt more comfortable if you had never been adopted. Obviously, you knew that was untrue. She had given you away for a suitable compensation, although she had never meant to give birth in the first place. But, you really enjoyed the thought of having a completely different life.

You had hardly spoken to any of your siblings for a while. Once in a while you received a call from Diego, just checking to see how you were. Sometimes Vanya phoned but it was very rare. Allison was always too busy with her movie, you wondered if she would even turn up for the funeral. Klaus hadn’t been seen in a long time, and Luther was still on the moon. You had been close with them when you were younger, but now it felt weird to be so intimate with each other’s lives after you had all left the academy; talking felt forced and uncomfortable so you avoided it at all costs. It was going to be different again after the funeral. You would all be expected to keep in touch, something you honestly didn’t care to do. Though it might be nice to see them again, you cringed just imagining it.

Soon, you shuffled off to your bedroom, turning out all of the lights on the way there. As you lay down, pulling the blanket over your body, you sighed, pinching in between your brows before closing your eyes and willing yourself off to sleep.

~~~

The pavement scuffed your shoes as you lazily made your way from your cab to your childhood home, breathing deeply while the cold air hit your face. Just as goose bumps prickled your skin, you found yourself wrapping your fingers around the metal gate, your feet stepping up the concrete stairs, face to face with the door. Suddenly you remembered how small you still felt against the mansion’s profile. Your nose burnt as you took one last deep breath, thrusting open the entrance, stepping inside.

Your eyes immediately scanned every inch of the lobby, and they rolled as you noticed that everything was exactly the same. The chandelier still hung at the same height, gently swinging left to right, right to left. The lights were still very dim and still flickered occasionally. The windows behind the staircase still allowed light to gleam through the ornate balustrade. The pillars holding up the second floor were still separated by wooden archways. The circular table still stood in the centre of the space; its feet lay on the partially patterned floor. The rest of the floor was still filled with the ugly black and white tiles that remain dull even after being polished. Nothing had changed.

Slowly, your feet took you into the living room, your eyes darting around to scan for something different once again. The fire still roared in the fireplace. The fireplace was still surrounded by the mantelpiece, Five’s portrait dangling high above it. The couches were still the same red, the table, the stools, and the bar, even the contents of the bar hadn’t changed a bit.

“Miss Y/N.” Your head whipped around as your eyes met those of who the voice belonged to, and you smiled.

“Hey, Pogo. How are you doing?” Your question brought a smile to the chimpanzee’s face and he moved over towards you, leaning on his walking stick. He hadn’t changed, either, apart from a few tufts of hair beginning to turn grey on his chin. He still possessed a set of glasses, a red overcoat with a purple waistcoat, and a red and blue patterned tie. He owned other ties, but that was always your favourite. You leaned down to hug him, which he returned immediately, pulling away after a few seconds.

“Is anyone else here?”

“I am aware of Master Diego's presence, although the others I haven’t seen, yet.”

“Thanks, Pogo.”

~~~

“What exactly are you looking for?” Luther spun around to see you leant against the door frame of your Dad’s bedroom, with your arms folded, brows knitted together. “They’re all locked. Diego already checked.”

“No forced entry, no sign of struggle. Nothing out of the ordinary.” Diego’s figure moved past you, entering the room that Luther seemed to be inspecting, leaning down slightly to get a better look as he neared him. “Oh, you got big, Luther.”

“Understatement.” You snorted, chipping in.

“What’s the secret, huh? Protein shakes? Low carbs?”

“What do you want?” Luther frowned as his arms were brought up slightly, gesturing his confusion as to why Diego was teasing him. His brows furrowed more as Number 2 stretched for his back pocket, silence filling the room for just a moment. He held a creased, folded piece of paper in his hand, extending his arm out to Number 1.

“The autopsy report. I broke into the coroner’s office.”

“Well, that was stupid.” Your hand found its way to your hip as you stared in disbelief at him, who was now sitting down, way too comfortable. He shrugged at you, before continuing.

“Surprise, surprise, Dad’s death was… normal. Just boring old heart failure.”

“Yeah, so?” The larger boy asked as he scanned over the piece paper after opening it.

“So, stop looking for something to prove that it wasn’t.” Luther’s eyes looked over to you, annoyance clearly present in your voice. “He’s dead. That’s it. No mystery.” You pushed yourself off the door frame before walking down the hall, hearing Luther and Diego mumbling to each other still, not knowing exactly what they’re saying, and not exactly caring. They were annoying to listen to, one always trying to outdo the other. The truth was, Diego didn’t like being Number 2, and Luther liked being Number 1 too much. He always thought that because he was Number 1 it made him the leader, but it didn’t. It was something that irked all of you, but Diego felt it the most. You couldn’t stand their pointless bickering when you were children and you certainly couldn’t stand it now.

It had been a few years short of a decade since you had left the academy, but it honestly felt like you hadn’t been gone at all. You had expected some sort of a change to have been made, but then again, you expect too much. The interior design was outdated and sickening to look at. It reminded you of everything that had happened when you were children.

Stepping along the hallway, numerous paintings, all very similar, caught your eye. The famous family portraits. The first contained all of you, apart from Vanya. She wasn’t ever included in things like that. The way her eyes turned sad whenever your Dad told her there was nothing special about her broke your heart. The second was the same, excluding Number 5; taken after he had jumped through time and not returned. It had been 16 years, more or less, and he still hadn’t returned. You often wondered if he was even alive, wherever he was. It was safe to say you had a fear of losing people after what had happened to Five. The third contained five of the children, Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus and you. It had been taken a few weeks after Ben had passed – something you hated to remember; it made your entire body ache.

You peeled your eyes away from the paintings, looking down. Tears glossed over your eyes as your mind flooded with thoughts about what had happened that day. It was horrifying. The way it happened had been completely erased from your memory. It all happened so quickly. All you can remember was seeing his lifeless body spread out on the floor. Your Mom had tried to save him, but in the end, there was nothing she could have done. Pogo had sat you all down in the lounge and broke the news to you. That day was one of the most miserable.

“Y/N? Hey, are you okay?” You hadn’t even realised you had started crying; not expecting to get so emotional, it was never a good thing for you. Looking up through misty eyes, you saw Klaus, frowning instantly, moving away when he stepped towards you. “Still mad at me?” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously while you rolled your eyes, angrily swiping at the loose tears that had fallen onto your face.

He hadn’t changed. His hair was the same length and texture. His facial hair looked as if it hadn’t grown the tiniest bit. His eyes were still that gorgeous green colour and were paired with slight bags underneath. He still wore those pants with the gaps in the side that you loved to wear, and the battered sneakers that you would have thought were his only pair of shoes. A bushy coat wrapped itself around his shoulders, hugging around the top of his body and the shirt he wore ended just below his belly button, exposing a thin strip of his flesh.

“I’m fine.”

“You don’t look fi—“

“I said I’m fine!” Klaus winced, nodding slightly before strolling down the stairs, glancing up at you after every couple of steps.

Huffing, you walked into your old bedroom, lying down and closing your eyes, calming down as you focused on your breathing. You hated that it still got you so riled up after so long, groaning in frustration as you tried not to think about it. You clenched and unclenched your fists every few seconds, breathing in sync.

Children behave, that’s what they say when we’re together.

A smile slowly crept onto your face as you heard the familiar words, sitting up. It was something you and your siblings listened to often, when your Dad wasn’t around. Smile turning to a grin, you stood, moving your arms and feet in time with the music. Nothing mattered at that moment. You weren’t thinking about Five, or Ben, or Klaus. You weren’t thinking about anything, just losing yourself in the music.

I think we’re alone now. There doesn’t seem to be anyone around.

I think we’re alone now. The beating of our hearts is the only sound.

The music stopped as quickly as it had started as everything suddenly went dark, the sound of thunder clapping so loud, as if it was outside your door. Gasping, you threw your door open, rushing downstairs as fast as you could, opening the door to the courtyard, eyes widening at the sight of blue electricity. Soon enough, your siblings joined you outside, confused looks plastered on all of your faces. Diego stood protectively in front of you, Luther by his side, Allison holding his hand.

“Don’t get too close!” Allison exclaimed, worry coating her voice.

“Yeah, no shit.” Diego replied, brows furrowing at what stood in front of you all.

“Out of the way!” Klaus came running out of the house, pushing past all of you, holding a fire extinguisher in his arms, attempting to spray what looked like a temporal anomaly, or a miniature black hole, one of the two. He rolled his eyes as it did nothing, throwing it instead, watching as it was consumed by the blue.

“What is that gonna do?”

“I don’t know. D’you have a better idea?” You reached out, latching onto Klaus’ sleeve, pulling him back to where you were standing. He looked over his shoulder, flashing you a smile before looking forward once again. Just as you clutched his wrist, a boy hit the floor, wearing a suit that was much too big for him, the electricity fading away quickly afterwards. He groaned, stood, and dusted off his suit, and your jaw dropped, feeling your heart miss a beat.

“Does anybody else see little Number 5 or is that just me?” Klaus questioned as you lunged forward, pulling Five into a tight hug, a couple of tears escaping your eyes as he returned the embrace. He looked exactly the same as he did when he left so, had he not aged? Was he permanently going to stay a 13 year old, now? So many questions raced through your mind at a lightning speed, but you really couldn’t care. Your brother was finally home.

Shortly after, you had all made your way in the kitchen. You perched on the side of the table, beside Klaus and the rest of your siblings, watching Five collect the things to make a peanut butter and marshmallow sandwich, a cutting board and knife already laid out on the table.

“What’s the date? The exact date.” The boy abruptly asked, and a couple of your siblings turned to look at each other in confusion.

“The 24th.”

“Of what?”

“March.”

“Good.” His eyes flickered for a moment, as if in concern, but you shrugged it off after realising nobody else had noticed.

“So… Where did you go?” Your voice came out a lot more nervously than you had meant it to, afraid of what his answer would be, in case he said something bad.

“The future. It’s shit by the way.”

“Called it!” Klaus looked up at you after yelling out and you frowned, almost as if scolding him for speaking when it wasn’t his turn. As the others spoke, you watched Five intensely, with a burning curiosity about what he saw in the future, wondering how bad it could actually have been. After all, Five didn’t look like he had done too bad for himself during whatever it was that he went through. But something about him was off. His eyes looked dull, like he’d been traumatised by one thing or another, like he had seen it all. Your body shivered imagining all the things that he could’ve seen.

~~~

The rain pattered on the concrete whilst you advanced once again into the courtyard. Looking around, you noticed the statue that stood in the centre and looked to the floor, sighing as Klaus gently pulled you along by your sleeve, an awkward but genuine smile passing between the two of you. Being mad at him was the least of your worries right now.

“Did something happen?” Your mother held her umbrella, a smile plastered on her seamless face, the same smile she always wore. Her eyes glanced around at you and your siblings, whose eyes also gazed around to look at each other. Your knuckles turned white as you gripped your own umbrella tightly, angry at her for even asking the question. Your jaw clenched and your other hand balled itself into a fist before Klaus nudged you subtly and you relaxed, his eyes searching yours as a look of distress fell over his face, a cigarette hanging limply from his lips.

“Dad died, remember?” Allison tilted her head at your mother, watching her terrifyingly realistically happy face fall into one of sympathy. Diego turned to face her in alarm as her red lips turned downwards.

“Oh. Yes, of course.”

The sound of footsteps allowed you to look away from your Mom, instead watching Pogo as he joined you and your siblings in the courtyard. Luther held your Dad’s urn and looked towards the chimpanzee just as Klaus sparked up another cigarette, this one looking just as miserable as the last.

“Whenever you’re ready, dear boy.” Number 1 took a deep breath at Pogo’s instructions, waiting a few seconds before extending his arm up to grasp the lid of the urn, taking off the lid. The metal scraped against itself as Luther dropped the lid-holding hand to his side, tilting the urn 180 degrees. Klaus cringed and you could barely hold back a giggle when the ashes all fell to the floor at once and Luther awkwardly shifted from one foot to the other as Pogo started to speak, but before he could finish, he was interrupted.

“He was a monster.” Your eyes darted to Diego, knowing he was right, but wanting to hear the rest of what Pogo had to say. Klaus let out a breathy laugh and the chimpanzee looked hurt, to which you frowned in empathy. “He was a bad person and a worse father. The world’s better off without him.”

“Diego, stop.” Knowing he was right but knowing it wasn’t the time made your voice waver as you spoke.

“My name is Number Two. You know why? Because our father couldn’t be bothered to give us actual names. He had Mom do it.” Turning your head to look at Klaus, silently begging him to help him shut Diego up. He took a drag of his cigarette before flicking his eyes to you, subtly shaking his head, causing you to look around at your other siblings as your Mom said something, locking eyes with Luther for a brief moment before looking away again. “Look, you wanna pay your respects, go ahead. But at least be honest about the kind of man he was.”

“You should stop talking now.” Luther warned, allowing you to snap your head up to him, watching the two of them, grasping tightly onto the bottom of Klaus’ coat, sharing a frown with Five before turning to view the scene they had created once again. “Diego, stop talking.”

“He couldn’t even stand the sight of you!” The two began to fight, and your hands tightened around the fabric in anxiety before loosening against your will, earning a look from Klaus after he had decided to egg on the fight happening before you. Trembling, you followed Five inside, whipping your body around when you heard a loud thud of something hitting the concrete, tears welling in your eyes while you watched Ben’s statue fall, hurrying inside before any tears spilt. Your feet reverberated in the empty hall, gasping as Luther came hurrying past you.

“Are you okay?” You hadn’t expected an answer from him, frowning when you saw him seizing his left arm, a cut hiding beneath his hand. Your body rotated, eyebrows puckering when you saw Diego and your mother step through the door. “What the hell did you do to him?”

“Nothing bad.”

“You hurt him, Diego.”

“Do you kids want to make cookies?” Storming away at your mother’s request, you fished through your pockets to find your apartment keys, shoving the umbrella on the floor after closing it, leaving as fast as you could, not caring to slam the doors once you had left. Pulling up the hood of your coat, shoving your hands in your pockets, walking away from the house you used to live in. You felt as if your feet were thundering on the pavement, afraid that if you stepped in the wrong place that you could cause the pavement to crack under the pressure.

You only ever saw your siblings at Weddings and Funerals, although you heard that none of you had attended Allison’s wedding. But, then again, what did she expect when she held it in L.A, as if all of you could afford to travel there simply for a wedding and then travel back afterwards. You had no idea why your siblings just couldn’t get on for a few hours at the very least. The tensions irked you like nothing else. You were siblings; you should act like siblings, not enemies.

~~~

Loud, rapid knocking on your apartment door woke you from your sleep and you groaned, pinching the bridge of your nose before throwing off the blankets, standing, trudging over to your front door. The knocking stopped and you wrapped your hand around the handle, looking out of the peephole. Opening the door after not seeing anyone, you stepped out to look into the corridor, shrugging when no one seemed to be there.

“You should have locks on your windows.” You let out a squeal as a voice spoke out from behind you, whirling around to see your brother stood in front of you.

“What? How did you—“

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Is that blood?” Glancing down to his red-stained arm, he shrugged off your question before you frowned, standing. “Five.”

Minutes later you joined him back in your lounge, with a first aid kit held in your hands. After pulling his sleeve up, you winced, taking a few minutes to clean his wound before bandaging up his arm, closing the first aid kit as he opened his mouth to speak.

“When I jumped forward and got stuck in the future, do you know what I found? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. The world ends in eight days, and I have no idea how to stop it.”

my masterlist

#the umbrella academy #tua #the umbrella academy season 2 #tua s2 #tua season two #the umbrella academy x reader #klaus hargreeves #klaus hargreeves x reader #tua s2 spoilers #klaus x reader #tua season 2 #reader insert #x reader

169 notes · View notes

temporoom · 3 years

Note

Hi! I'm a big TPN fan who's dying to read A Letter from Norman. I read your spoiler post about it. As a big Ray fan, what you wrote about him having a crush on a older girl really got me curious. What kind of interest did he have in her? How did he show it? What's their story?! It's hard to imagine since he acts different with only Emma. I'm so itching to get all the juicy details. Maybe even my RayEmma ship will sink, but I don't care! I need to know!! Would you kindly enlighten me? Thanks! QuQ

Thank you so much for trusting me with this ! Sadly, i am far from being unbiased, and that post is kinda old, so I need to rectify something :

No, Ray doesn’t have a crush on Susan.

It’s just me and my own weird tastes in ships (I also like to see them as being actual siblings). But he indeed treated her differently from other children at the orphanage, mostly because SHE was treating him differentely as well. I’ll try to summarize, while giving as much detail as possible, the chapter.

(It’s a detailed summary of it, so very long)

The beginning of the chapter starts with Norman talking about Ray for 4 pages (without mentioning Emma individually, take it as you will), he explains that he has never seen Ray’s tears in his entire life, but thinks that he may have seen him cry once. And he then goes on to explain in which circumstances it was. (The flash-backs part aren’t from Norman’s point of view, but from an omniscient narrator.)

It starts some time after Emma’s 9th birthday and the shipment of one of their younger sibling (called Jimmy but this is irrelevant). Most children go on with their life, looked after by their eldest sibling, Susan, the only one of her age left at the house. After proposing a game of hide-and-seek, she convinces Ray (with the help of Emma) to come and play with them instead of sulking in his corner. She tells Ray that she knows he is sad, and wants him to get better, to Ray’s annoyance, since he expected Jimmy to be shipped anyway. (She ruffles his hair by the way, he probably took that habit from her).

During the game, they explain that Susan is their elder, and the smartest in the house, even giving Norman a hard time during tag, so if they want to win they have to do better than follow Ray’s laziness. She is extremely attentive, noticing any changes in her siblings. Even Ray, who thinks he has mastered his poker face, couldn’t tell if she noticed those within him, as each time a sibling leaves she comes to him and forces him to play with them to lift his spirit. Ray observed her enough to know she didn’t discover the truth, and finds her pity towards him annoying. (And we all know Ray is a tsundere)

When he is about to give up on finding a better hiding spot, Ray finds a wounded bird. Emma suggests they take care of it, but Norman and Ray explains that if they were to touch the bird, then its family would never come to get him back again. Since the birds’s mother don’t seem to come, and Emma starts to feel sorry for the bird (being an orphan herself). She wants to take him home.

Ray scolds her, asking if she really thinks it would be happy in a cage, and that maybe it was the bird’s destiny to die here. To which Emma replies that maybe it was Ray’s fate to meet that bird and he shouldn’t leave it here. Emma wins the argument thanks to Norman, and they catch the bird. Susan joins them, and after getting Isabella’s approval, their older sister tells that the three of them are the one who will take care of the bird, to Ray’s annoyance again.

Norman names it Ner, and they get a cage with a little sign with its name written on it. The bird is a robin. To feed Ner, Emma goes to search for worms, and brings back a ton, making Susan squeal in disgust and hides behind Ray, only trusting him to protect her from them.

As time pass, the robin gets better, and everyone got attached to it. Then, Isabella announces to Ray that she received a sudden call from the center, asking for an extra shipment this month, and this shipment is Susan. (it mentions that it was very sudden, and considering the time... it’s most likely for the Tifari). Isabella asks Ray if he expected her to live until her 12th birthday, he doesn’t reply to that, but it’s what he thought. She then asks him to look after Susan to make sure she doesn’t escape.

Ray suddenly realizes how much he would miss her if she leaves, how no one would speak to him like she does... No one would comfort him like she does. Of course he cares about Emma and Norman, but Susan was the only one capable of seeing those changes he couldn’t even notice himself. Her stubborness “saved him” (I quote). He considers finding a replacement to Susan, but knows it would mean sacrifying Emma or Norman. There is nothing to do about it, and he knows he can’t save everyone. He considers making his plan earlier, but it’s not ready to do so yet.

As he walks into the corridor, he wakes Ner up, who thinks the boy is here to bring him food. Ray mocks the bird for trusting him so much, and for being dependant of humans, comfortably locked in its cage. (You know what parralels he makes here, I hope I don’t have to explain) As Ray tries to free the bird and opens the cage’s door, Susan spots him and starts to scold him. Telling him that everyone takes good care of the bird, and he shouldn’t let it escape. (french translation here, idk about how it is in japanese)

It only reminds him of how she is going to die. Susan scolds him each time he is too harsh or refuses to play with the other kids, he thinks for a moment that a real sister, linked by blood to him, would have done that.

“I don’t think... It is happy to live in this cage...” He blurts out, almost revealing the truth. Did I just gave a link to my own art? Yes. And then ran away to his bedroom, leaving Susan confused.

The next day Isabella’s announces Susan’s “adoption”. While everyone congratulates her, Ray has been avoiding her during the whole day, even skipping his duties to the bird. Susan talked to Emma and Norman about what happened the night before, but they were as confused as her. She starts to doubt her own conviction and if keeping the bird is truly a good idea. She admits that she finds Ray always sad whenever one of their siblings leave, to which Emma replies what everyone had seen of him until now :

“But... Ray is never happy...”

No one had noticed Ray’s feelings. Everyone believed that he was just always like that, and even the idea of a Ray walking around smiling happily disturbs the red head. Susan dismisses it, and tells that Ray would be happier anyway without her, since she was annoying him so much. Emma and Norman reassures her, and tell her that she will be very missed. Susan thinks about those three’s friendship, envying it over her own loneliness as the last of their older siblings and without any news of how they are. But also happy they can count on each other, if one of them gets separated from the others, she was sure they would find each other again.

The day of her depart, a sudden wave of nostalgia hits her as she walks through the hallway of the house, she looks at the bird, its cardboard with the initial of her three favorite people written on it. When she bumps into Ray, while he looks at her sullen (making her even sadder), she asks him if she can take Ner with her. Saying that since Ray doesn’t seem to like the bird, it would be fine if she kept it. Before Ray could reply, Isabella agrees. But the boy knows that if she takes the bird with her, it’s most likely to end up just like she will.

While the kids are sad to see both their older sister and the bird leave, most are okay with it. But Ray raises his voice to refuse. And despite Isabella’s stare, he insists on keeping Ner. Susan snaps and yell at Ray, asking him why he is acting like this and what he wants. She continues by saying that if she lets the bird here, Ray would try to free it again, denouncing him in front of everyone.

Ray seems taken aback as the other children looks at him. But Susan doesn’t want to back down. She wants the bird with her, she had hoped it would solve everyone’s problem, and especially Ray’s one with the bird... Seeing him refuse was beyong her comprehension. Ray stops himself, before it’s too late, from telling her that if she takes the bird with her, they will both die. He yells back at her that in the end, she’ll just do whatever she wants to and take the bird with him, whether he wants it or not, and then finishs preparing the table for breakfast.

The other kids are angry at him for ruining their last breakfast with Susan, and trying to free Ner. But Emma and Norman notices that there’s something wrong with him, he seems to react too strongly when it comes to the robin. Emma proposes to Norman to prepare a gift for Susan, to leave a memento of them to her. The boy, immediately understanding her intention, agrees. Despite Susan being able to see the changes in Ray more easily, they were the ones who understood him the best after all.

Ray stays in the library during that time, thinking about solutions to save the bird, but Susan always stays near the cage, so Ray would not free it. No matter what possibilities come to his mind, Ray always come to same conclusion : it will be killed. He concludes that Isabella is testing his loyalty by checking how far he would go to save his sister and the bird, or if he would only save one of them. He doesn’t even know why he is so bothered by that bird, thinking that he just has to let it be killed like he had let all his other siblings die until now. Even if he can’t save Susan, he desesperately wants to save the bird... yet Susan doesn’t let him. (Do I really need to point out the metaphor again?)

As Susan is changing into her new uniform, Emma takes the cage, pretexting that she is going to clean it up one last time before she leaves. While Susan shows her clothes proudly to her mother, Ray comes and tells her that she can take the bird with her in the end, as well as to apologize for his behavior earlier. He looks like he is making amends for his actions, in the most natural way possible, and yet Susan sees that something is not going right. But she can’t ask what it is as she is overflowed by gifts from her younger siblings.

When she is about to get the cage back, Emma and Norman ran up to her, and apologize. They let the bird fly away. Everyone is shocked, and despite that Susan let a sad smile form on her lips.

“I see... But if it managed to fly, then it means that it got better.”

Then Emma gives to Susan a bracelet with one of Ner’s feathers attached to it. (The one that naturally falls don’t think they took it directly from the bird). She shows to her similar bracelets to the one she is giving on her wrist and Norman’s one, and pulls Ray closer to she can attach one last bracelet to his wrist. She tells Susan that like that, they are still together even if she leaves.

Susan bursts into tears, thankful for the gift. And apologize for yelling at Ray in front of everyone, recognizing that it was selfish of her to want to keep Ner to herself because she was sad of leaving Grace Field alone. She explains to him that because the bird was named after them, she wanted it to keep them close to her, just like how Ray perceived himself in the bird, she saw them in it as well.

Before leaving one last time, she pats Ray’s head (he definitely took this habit from her) and asks him to never stay alone again. She ruffles his hair, as he voice breaks when he nods. He apologizes to her one last time, so quietly that only her, Emma and Norman can hear him. Either for being angry at her... or for being unable to save her. (it’s left to interpretation) She leaves with a smile on her face.

When Ray is alone with Norman and Emma, he asks them what they did with the bird. Norman replies without any hesitation that it seemed to be important to Ray, so they deliberately freed it. Emma follows up by telling him that she thought thoroughly about what he told her about the bird being unhappy in its cage, and she concluded that she wouldn’t a life like that either, dying alone in a cage. Even if she was protected and feed, if she was a bird, she would still prefer flying in the sky.

Ray knew at that moment that whatever may happen, Emma and Norman would choose to fly free. He is glad that he has them. He thanks them for doing it, Norman replies that when he is ready, Ray can tell them why he wanted to free the bird. Emma smiles and asks him to, play with them tomorrow. Susan is not here to drag him into their games after all. Ray misses her, but thinks that with Emma and Norman by his side, everything will be alright.

Then we end the flash back and go back to Norman’s narration but I won’t extend myself on it, this ask was about Susan.

In conclusion: their relationship is the one of “blood-related” siblings, in the sense that they find each other annoying and yet stays close and attached to one another. But no matter how close Susan was of Ray, his closest friends are still Emma and Norman.

It’s a very beautiful chapter, and I love it. I hope you found some kind of answer in this very long post ! As for me, I prefer to leave it at that, so everyone can have their own interpretations of Ray’s and Susan’s relationship.

But to be honest there’s only like... two Noremma’s moment in this whole book, and the rest of the time it’s Norman thinking about Ray. And since you are a Rayemma shipper, there’s an entire chapter where Emma and Ray shares one braincell and are cute.

#the promised neverland #tpn #ynn #yakusoku no neverland #ray #emma #norman #susan #isabella #a letter from norman #novel #summary #detailed summary

51 notes · View notes

midnightactual · 4 years

Photo

Critical Analysis & Tactics I (CAT-1): The Hollowfication Incident

How strong is Yoruichi? That’s actually a very involved question. I’ve decided to create a series of articles detailing my thoughts on the matter by looking at military incidents and confrontations involving her. This is the first, and you may consult the others at your leisure:

CAT-2: The Central 46 Trial Breakout

CAT-3: Yoruichi vs. Byakuya

CAT-4A & B: Yoruichi vs. Soifon

CAT-5: Yoruichi & Soifon vs. Aizen

CAT-6: Yoruichi vs. Yammy

CAT-7: Yoruichi, Kisuke, & Isshin vs. Aizen

CAT-8: Yoruichi & Co. vs. Yhwach

CAT-9: Yoruichi vs. Askin

I’ve talked about this topic before (here) but I’d like to investigate it again from a different angle while also discussing what really happened on the night of the Hollowfication Incident. I think the five pages above tell you something very important about her strength, particularly the bottom-left one. These are from chapter -103 and are Yamamoto’s orders after Kensei, Mashiro, and the upper officer corps of the 9th Division (the Muguruma Commando Unit) go “missing”. (I’ve omitted Kisuke’s interruption as it doesn’t reveal much that’s pertinent to this discussion.) We learn an awful lot from these orders and it’s worth going through it all in some detail in order to get to my point.

Since the is is a long post, let me put the conclusion here up front: Yoruichi is much stronger than the average Taichō of the Gotei 13.

01. I would, quite aside from these pages, first like to remind the reader that nominally the Gotei 13, Onmitsukidō, and the Kidō Corps are equal in their status of reporting to Central 46. The Onmitsukidō and the Kidō Corps do not report to the Gotei 13. This means that accordingly, the Captain-Commander (Yamamoto), the Supreme Commander (Yoruichi), and the Corps Commander (Tessai) are technically co-equal in official stature; you might regard them as roughly equivalently ranked, being like the Joint Chiefs of Staff of their respective branches. (Jūshirō’s shock and Shunsui’s comment that Tessai’s presence indicates, “This is turning into a big deal,” is proof of that.)

Yamamoto, by virtue of seniority over the other two (and Yoruichi’s dual-hatted command within the Gotei 13) still commands their respect (as evidenced by Tessai addressing him formally and Yoruichi heeding his orders without question) and might be thought of as being like a Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff as a result. I’m not arguing at all that Yoruichi and Tessai are equal in strength to Yamamoto, as they plainly are not. However, you would expect by virtue of these positions that they would be more powerful than run of the mill Taichō, and I believe this sequence of events proves that.

02. Notice in the second page that Yamamoto says that 5 Taichō will be dispatched to deal with the situation. This does seem to be an accurate translation by Viz as the red characters, 隊長 (taichō) and 五 (go), do indeed mean “Captain” and “five”.

He will then proceed to name (on page 3) Rose, Shinji, and Love, and then to indicate Tessai and Hachigen (on page 5). Thus: even though he is the Lieutenant of the Kidō Corps, Hachigen’s equivalent rank in the Gotei 13 would be Captain! He is a Taichō-level combatant, which fits in well with his performance alongside Soifon against Barragan. That he is actually lower ranked than Tessai despite this tells you that Tessai is likely notably stronger (which is subsequently borne out). Shunsui is the one to suggest that Tessai be substituted with Lisa, to which Yamamoto agrees.

03. Agreeing to this fits into Yamamoto’s other behavior. Let’s talk about him first. The important thing to understand about Yamamoto is that we perceive him very differently as a character (because of our point of view) than how the characters themselves perceive him in-universe. To your average reader, he probably seems staid, close-minded, overly conservative, dispassionate, and stubborn, precisely because he supports (and substantially built!) the status quo. However, he is supposed to be the most experienced, wise, and powerful Shinigami there is. And, in fact, he is.

Consider things from Yamamoto’s perspective. Things in the Gotei 13, the Seireitei, and Soul Society as a whole have worked for over 2,011 years as of TBTP. (The graduating class of about 1956, which Renji, Momo, Kira, and originally Rukia were part of, is definitively established as the Academy’s 2066th graduating year, meaning the Academy was founded circa 110 BC.) That compares quite favorably to the longest continuously extant human state, the Pandyan Empire, which lasted for about 1,850 years. The runner up is the Eastern Roman (or Byzantine) Empire which lasted 1,123 years by itself (add 499 more if you want to count the whole Roman Empire too, as the Byzantines themselves would’ve). That’s pretty good. It tells you something: Yamamoto’s system works (largely because he guarantees its continuation through his own personal power).

And Yamamoto generally conducts himself rather cautiously and methodically. He doesn’t like change, spontaneity, or impulsivity, regardless of how justifiable it may or may not be. (These are all things Ichigo initially represents.) And actually, as a soldier, that is probably exactly the kind of commanding officer you would really want to serve under: one who doesn’t take wild risks which might get your ass killed. People respect Yamamoto not just for his strength, but because he’s actually good at what he does.

04. Before we talk about what his orders actually are, I want to make a brief digression here to make a point: only Taichō-level combatants actually matter in the Gotei 13 in terms of military calculations. This is firmly established by the Soul Society arc. Byakuya says this in chapter 162 about bankai:

The key takeaways:

Members of the Great Noble Clans are stronger than everyone else (making people like Yamamoto, Retsu, Aizen, and Kenpachi extreme anomalies)

Even members of the Great Noble Clans only rarely achieve bankai (which, given a Shinigami generation is much longer than a human one, is saying something)

People who achieve bankai are uniformly important to Soul Society

You know who has bankai? Renji, a Fukutaichō who just achieved it and had used it in open combat against Byakuya, a feat which everyone with spiritual sense should’ve detected at the time given it, as Yoruichi notes elsewhere, makes one 5 to 10 times stronger. (Recall how on the Senzaikyu Bridge, everyone felt Ichigo’s approach even though he didn’t have bankai yet.) So Renji’s feat should be very impressive and important, right? Not to Yamamoto. In chapter 153, he already told us:

Renji is expendable. He could be killed and replaced without issue. Yamamoto then goes on to even further establish that Fukutaichō are comparatively useless by effortlessly crushing Nanao with his reiatsu alone in chapter 155. In short, Yamamoto does not rate bankai by itself. (The sole exception to this attitude by Yamamoto is perhaps toward his own Fukutaichō, Sasakibe.) It should also be extremely self-evident that Taichō-level combatants can have an extremely wide separation in power from one another, and I’m not going to substantiate that assertion here because we’d be here all day. So, when we talk about what happens during the Hollowfication Incident, let’s do so with a sense of clarity that only Taichō really matter in Yamamoto’s calculations.

05. Having established that, let’s return to the pages and talk about Yamamoto’s orders and how he’s positioning his forces on this particular night. A summary:

1st: Yamamoto - defense

2nd: Yoruichi - standby

3rd: Rose - deployed

4th: Retsu - defense

5th: Shinji - deployed

6th: Ginrei - defense

7th: Love - deployed

8th: Shunsui - defense

9th: Kensei - MIA

10th: n/a - office unfilled

11th: Kiganjō - no orders

12th: Kisuke - no orders

13th: Jūshirō - defense

The Gotei 13 had 12 Taichō at the time, as the 10th Division’s had died and not been replaced yet. Kensei was at this point MIA, thus putting them at 11. Including Tessai and Hachigen (as noted earlier) bumps them back up to 13. This tells us why the Kidō Corps was brought in: to bring the Gotei 13 back up to full strength during this crisis.

Yamamoto directly assigns his oldest and most experienced subordinates (Shunsui, Jūshirō, and Ginrei) to the defense of the Seireitei. His orders to Retsu to stay and his own continuing presence mean that indeed all the oldest and seemingly strongest Taichō are allocated to defense and garrison duty.

Rose, Shinji, and Love are deployed (along with, initially, Tessai and Hachigen) to investigate.

Kiganjō and Kisuke aren’t issued orders, presumably because both are considered unreliable. Kisuke is there, if late, but is effectively dismissed after his outburst regarding Hiyori.

Yoruichi is designated as the only flexible element in this plan. Before I return to this final point, I want to address some lingering matters and then explain to you what this deployment actually means.

First, It’s notable that Yamamoto’s assertion that Retsu is “too important” is a reflection of her healing abilities and their importance to a potential wartime situation. (Note that Kisuke, in chapter 227, dismissed Orihime from the war effort against Aizen by saying that 4th Division, particularly Retsu, more than equaled her abilities.)

Second, the substitution of Lisa for Tessai (at Shunsui’s suggestion) is not a reflection on Lisa’s power (remember: Fukutaichō don’t matter, and Lisa didn’t have bankai at this time anyway). It’s suggested because of the risk of sending Tessai and Hachigen together. It’s presumably approved because of the seeming overabundance of force in the deployed unit.

What do I mean by that? Think about it this way: a Taichō and his subordinates go missing. While that is (very) concerning, consider the ways in which it is likely to happen. Is it likely to be a Hollow? Almost certainly not. It suggests an ambush. Which in turn suggests a coordinated military strategy. By whom? Unknown. So, how do you respond? You respond in force, but there is probably such a thing as too much force. After all, what is likely to take out 4 Taichō, let alone 5? Not a lot. So the difference between 4 and 5 doesn’t much matter, and substituting Lisa for Tessai is fine. The deployed force should still be overkill either way.

It also retains Tessai for defense, and Yamamoto’s real concern here is revealed by his allocation of a preponderance of forces to the Seireitei: he seems to believe this is a diversion in preparation for an attack on the Seireitei itself. Thus, through action and inaction alike, he commits 4 Taichō to deployment and retains 9 for defense. He is overwhelmingly interested in defense against possible follow-ups and believes he has likely still committed excessive force to deal with whatever Kensei’s situation is.

06. Thus, finally, we come to Yoruichi’s role in this plan as the the only mobile auxiliary force. Let me state my premise first, then I’ll substantiate it: Yoruichi is the only possible backup the deployed force has, meaning she and she alone is their lifeline in the event something goes wrong—this fact alone tells you she is more powerful than the deployed force as a whole. In other words, Yoruichi is stronger than Kensei, Rose, Love, Shinji, Tessai, and Hachigen put together.

Bold claim, I’m sure! What evidence do I have to support this assertion? I tell you it’s simply obvious using conservative tactical logic, studying their military disposition, and understanding the political situation.

Tactical logic first: suppose for a second that there was an unknown criminal incident in a local big box store like Walmart, Home Depot, or whatever you like. A squad car’s worth of cops (2) went in. They then stopped responding to central. So, backup is ordered and now four times as many cops go in (8). What if they stop responding? Would you send in another 2 cops? Or 8? Or even 10? No. You would likely send in at least 20–30, if not just the local SWAT team. It doesn’t make sense, after having lost so many elements already, not to escalate radically, just as sending 8 guys is a radical escalation from sending 2. You don’t send 2, then 8, then somewhere between 2 and 10 yet again. You’re throwing away limited forces for no gain at that point.

Yoruichi is the SWAT team. The fact Yoruichi alone was the potential reinforcements for the deployed group tells you that one of two things is true:

Yoruichi is stronger, unto herself, than the deployed group, or...

Yamamoto was prepared to simply sacrifice the deployed group if the situation went bad, and their backup, for no gain

Military disposition second: given Yamamoto is already working with a diminished and very finite force, with possibly 2 out of 13 Taichō down, (2) does not make a lot of sense given his character. (Again: note how he reserved Retsu and Tessai out of strategic concern.) What is the benefit? It is worth noting here that after the defection of Aizen, Gin, and Kaname a century later, the Seireitei also adopted a conservative and defensive posture (but more on this later).

Political situation third: doing this also wouldn’t make a lot of sense given the state that the Gotei 13 was in as a whole at the time, which Shunsui and Jūshirō helpfully expounded upon in chapter -108:

Long story made short, the Gotei 13 was in a period of upheaval and turmoil at the time—a period of weakness. Sacrificing your military assets when you are weak is not particularly intelligent.

We can thus recast our two earlier possibilities as follows:

Yoruichi is in fact incredibly strong, or...

Yamamoto is a military idiot who wasted forces for no good reason, despite the fact he is supposed to be extremely militarily competent

I know which of those two my money is on. But I’m also not done yet in proving it.

07. Let’s be very clear here that the events of the Hollowfication Incident were the most extreme losses we know of that the Gotei 13 ever suffered in terms of assets that actually mattered. The Gotei 13 lost a grand total of 8 Taichō-class combatants that night (Yoruichi, Kisuke, Tessai, Hachigen, Shinji, Rose, Love, and Kensei). Their strength was reduced from 14 acting with the Kidō Corps to 6. That’s 57.12% losses. From this perspective, it was a much worse disaster than Aizen’s defection or the Wandenreich War in terms of outcome. The loss of both the Supreme Commander of the Onmitsukidō and the Corps Commander of the Kidō Corps was especially grievous.

It’s also worth pointing out that as far as Central 46 was concerned the Hollowfication Incident was a conspiracy orchestrated by Kisuke, Tessai, and by proxy Yoruichi. Given the losses, it can only be read as an attempted coup, and other than Aizen’s murder of Central 46, was a much more serious event than even Aizen’s defection.

This raises a simple question: Why didn’t Central 46 demand Yoruichi, Tessai, and Kisuke be hunted down?

The first and most obvious answer is that numerically the forces to do so while maintaining the defense of the Seireitei simply did not exist. Only Yamamoto, Retsu, Ginrei, Shunsui, Kiganjō, and Jūshirō were left. Kiganjō was plainly unsuited for such a mission. Retsu would be even more critical after such losses and would never be sent. Ginrei, Shunsui, and Jūshirō were exactly the ones tasked with securing the Seireitei and could be thought of as the ‘minimum’ needed to do that. And finally, it’s unlikely that Yamamoto himself would go, even though he later states to both Shunsui and Jūshirō in chapter 154 that:

Put simply: Yamamoto didn’t have the manpower to chase them. (And Yamamoto would make a very similar decision after Aizen’s defection, choosing not to pursue him, Gin, and Kaname to Hueco Mundo, which he likely regarded as being a giant trap he could ill afford to take loses from; he learned from the Hollowfication Incident!)

But that isn’t the only answer, because even when he later did after the Gotei 13 was reconstituted, he wasn’t interested in tracking them down. This is surely not because they were just written off as dead (as Byakuya implies on the Senzaikyu Bridge) given the enormity of the accusations against them. The Gotei 13 didn’t give up on tracking down Ginjō and Xcution for far less; it isn’t in the business of forgiving or forgetting.

Maybe Yoruichi choosing to spare Central 46′s lives factored into that decision (see here) but if it did, doesn’t, “She might come back and kill us all and there’s nothing we could do to stop it,” tell you she’s very strong?

And if that didn’t affect the decision-making process, what did? I’ll tell you plainly: Yamamoto did not have confidence that any team he could afford to send out was likely to beat Yoruichi, Tessai, and Kisuke—and he didn’t think much of Kisuke. That should also tell you that Yoruichi is very strong.

The Urahara Shōten crew was allowed not only to escape but to live in peace not just because of whatever actions that might have taken to protect themselves, but because a military confrontation with them was simply too risky. And a major component of that risk must, logically, be that Yoruichi is extremely strong.

The anime-only Reigai Uprising filler arc is exactly that—filler—but it is known that Kubo was at least consulted for the filler arcs. And during that filler arc, in episode 319, Yoruichi’s Wiki entry notes the following:

She fought three Shinigami captains and four lieutenant-level and above opponents at the same time with Hakuda without receiving any notable damage.

All of the above is in my opinion convincing evidence that although this feat is non-canon, it would be very plausible for it to happen in canon. That’s how strong Yoruichi is. That is why she is the designated threat barometer (see here) for the latter half of the series. Yoruichi is not arrogant. This whole sequence is designed to tell you as much.

P.S. Since I'm also vaguely talking about this: yeah, Yoruichi didn't beat Askin. But you know what? Mayuri didn't beat Pernida, Shunsui didn't beat Lille, and Byakuya, Tōshirō, Kenpachi, and the rest didn't beat Gerard. None of the Sternritter were beaten by their primary opponents. And, for the record, Yoruichi did better against Askin than Ōetsu did, without a ridiculously overpowered zanpakutō and with a much stronger Askin, as Yhwach hadn't yet absorbed the Soul King and powered up the Sternritter when Ōetsu confronted them. Just sayin'...

#Out Of Character #Long Post #Meta

30 notes · View notes

oh-for-fic-sake · 4 years

Text

A Walk In The Park

Masterlist

Warninngs: Swearing

Meeting Henry in the park.

A Walk In The Park

It was about 9 in the morning when you got the leads out of the cupboard deciding that by this time the park would be quiet as the school rush was over and anyone who had to be at work was.Your two excited dogs ran at you jumping over one another to be the first on a lead , your 3 year old blue doberman Milly was first as you clipped the thick leather lead followed by your bearly year old phantom standard poodle polly. You preferred walking them when it was quiet because of their rare colours your girls were a prime target for dognapping because any pups they had would be very expensive. You grabbed a small bag of treats ,their ball launcher and favourite ball as you left . Walking to the park it was a huge enclosed field that had a small fenced off play area in the middle there was a foot path around the edge with the occasional bench and bin, large trees dotted hear and there across the whole park, near the enterance there was a small coffee kiosk for the dog walkers that frequently used the safe enclosed space to run there dogs. Once there you saw three other dogs running loose one large and two small but they were far enough away that you should be able to avoid them. Walking a quater the way down the field you released your babies letting them go scatty they both ran off in a large circle around you letting off steam. After a few moments they slowed down panting watching you as you leaned the ball launcher on your shoulder then flicked it catapulting the ball a fair distance . Playing the game of fetch as you continued walking slowly around the field. Throwing it for the 12th or so time was when you heard someone calling for there dog to "leave it" as an akita that tore past your two and caught the ball resutling in a freindly game of chase as Milly and Polly tried to get it back you laughed and waved it off as the large man jogged closer to you still calling his dog. He was very handsome from here you noted.

"Its fine, their freindly" you called out ,he shook his head at the playful pups before smoothing his dark hair back as he watched the three play excitedly. It was rare that your babies had a similar sized dog to play with everyone now days opting for tiny 'cute' dogs and the larger breeds falling out of fashion. You giggled as the akita run up to its owner dropping the ball who dutifully threw it in your direction. The three dogs chased it erratically it was only as they got closer you realised he'd misjudged the distance before you could move his dog collided with your legs sweeping them from under you. Crying out suprized you landed with a heavy thump on the near frozen ground, the dog realising its mistake stood over you sniffing to see if you were ok joined by your two, before being pushed away by the most beautifull man you think you have ever seen, your thought stuttered to a halt as you noticed he looking down at you with bright blues eye filled with concern.

"Kal you big lump look what you did. I am so sorry are you ok?" He said helping you up laughing it off.

"Yeah im fine not the first time a dogs knocked me on my ass." He looked you over quickly decideing that your ok but began trying to brush the dry dirt off of your legs and bottom. Flustered as this heavenly stranger wiped at the seat of your jeans,you bent down quickly to take over ending up butting heads hissing you both grabed your throbbing forehead.

"Shit sorry fuck is your head ok? Look at me" he said cupping your face making you look at him as he gently ran a thumb over your bumped head. You couldn't help the a small gasp as you saw just how handsome he really was tall and broad, a clean shaven angular jawline,his mouth had a defined cupids bow that looked perfect for kissing among other things, lightly defined cheek bones and all topped off with a set of incrediblely clear blue eyes he looked like a god, you snapped out of it as he ran his tongue over his lips in what you assumed was a nervous gesture.'well you are just fucking oogling him' you thought

"That was my fault sorry, are you ok?" He nodded staring at you still smoothing over your face, you thought it was because you looked a mess after falling ass over tit but it was actually the opposite he thought you were beautiful. Blushing at his appraisal you nervously pulled his hands away ,looking down stroking your babies who had been hovering around you since you fell,you quickly turned your attention to his dog.

"So hes a boy then?" He nodded sheepishly as he realised he'd been caught staring snapping out of his thoughts.

"Yep this is my son Kal" he said ruffling the dogs furry head who was panting content. You giggled it was cute

"These are my babies Milly and Polly" you pointed each one out he smiled letting them sniff his hand gaining approval to stroke them.

"They are really sweet ,amazing colours i dont think iv seen them before. I couldn't acctually tell what breed Milly was when i watched you come through the gates" He stated then faulterd sheepishly as he'd let slip he had been watching you ,choosing to ignore it he concentrated on giving your babies ear rubs as they reveled in all his attention. You nodded smieling shyly.

"Well thank you most people think they are scary tho because of there size. Milly is what you call a blue doberman and Polly is a phantom coat both are rare its why i try to bring them here when its quiet" he nodded in understanding sighing in relief as you didn't mention his embarrassing admission.

"Sometime people are wary of kal because of his size. And you coming when its quiet would explain why I've never seen you here befor, I'd have definalty remembered you" he flirted you blushed not sure where to look as he smirked at you. He picked up the ball launcher and leads from the floor beside you. Holding out your hand to take them back he twisted them away from you lightly with a teasing grin.

"I think we should continue this walk together ,you know for health and saftey's sake" he said winking at you as he used the launcher to pick up and launch the ball out towards the field causing the trio chase it. You nodded looking away your face glowing he chuckled.

"I just realised i havent introduced myself im Henry" he held out a stong hand you shook it introducing yourself.

"Y/n" he tested your name

"Well Y/n would you allow me to buy you a coffee on this fine cold morning?" You smiled shyly at him nodding

"If you want to"

"Oh i do trust me" you felt giddy as he slipped your hand in his before makeing your way to the kiosk.

It had been just over three weeks since you first walk with Henry and it had become a daily occurrence you'd both meet up at around nine grabbed your coffees and do two or three slow laps around the park before going your seperate ways. In that time you'd gotten to know one another he seemed quite reluctant to talk about his job at first, which you understood when he told you he was an actor, he was worried that it would scare you off but it didn't bother you in the slightest and that was the day you exchanged numbers. Your walks were spent chatting and casually flirting with one another, before you knew it you had a crush on the sweet man. Today was particularly cold as you made your way to the park when you got there Henry was at the bench by the kiosk coffees in hand he let out a laugh when he saw both your dogs in their little knit jumpers. You pouted at him as he gave you your drink.

"So your one of those?" He got out between laughter as you let them off their leads and began your walk.

"Yep its for a good reasons tho poodles hair is fine and wavy when they're young it gets thicker and curly with age untill then they feel the cold really bad and Milly gets jealous if Polly has her jumper on and she doesn't" he nodded watching as kal followed the two going between them investigating the jumpers comically then they began chaseing one another for the new slightly bigger ball that you had tossed towards them.

Henry moved closer towards you grasping your hand as usual, taking sips of his drink opting to kick the ball with across the grass with his feet as one of the dogs returned it.

"Well its freezing today there threatening snow by the end of the week" you sighed

"Just what i need snow" you muttered into your cup taking a mouthfull.

"Tell me about it i hope it will hold off until friday" you looked at him confused as he kicked the ball again.

"I have to travel just outside of london on wednesday should be back by friday morning at the latest ,its a fitting and makeup test for an upcoming role ,they have a few different ideas but want to have it sorted asap the costume and props are going to take a while to be ordered and made" he explained shrugging lightly, you deflated slightly it meant soon you wont be able to see him, he would be away filming and promoting and youd be on your own.

"Oh.. that sounds fun tho, are you looking forward to it?" You asked trying to bite down your dissappointment he turned to you smileing wide

"Yes its a role i never thought id get when i auditioned but im really excited for it i cant wait to start filming" he said enthusiasticly you nodded but kept quiet as you kicked the ball kal had brought back. He slowed down and binned your now empty coffee cups then took a long look at you sighing before pulling you around to face him.

"Hey dont worry i'll call you everyday at the fitting and when I'm filming" he said stroking your hair out of your face with one hand an overly intimate gesture to anyone onlookers.

"You dont have to do that" you said trying to look anywhere but his face not wanting him to see how upset you were. You had no right to feel like this you hadn't even known him that long.

"But what if i want to?" He said before pulling you closer to him by your interlocked hands and joining free hands. Your gaze snapped to at that he continued knowing he now had your full attention.

"What if I say that I'm gonna miss you, miss talking to you everyday ,miss the way I can make you blush adorabley with just a look or miss holding your hands in mine ,that im going to find it hard leaving you behind here when I've only just gotten to know you." You were lost for words staring at him as he rubbed to back of his neck.

"That... didnt sound as cheesy in my head.. I just mean I really really like you, as soon as I leave here I cant wait for tomorrow to see you again. What I'm trying to say is that I really really like you" he admitted

"I like you too" the words left your mouth before you could stop them he looked up glowing at you. Quickly before his courage dissapeared he wound his large arms around your waist and pulled you against him leaning in for a kiss, you gasped as his lips met yours soft and gentle at first before tilting his head down more and deepening the kiss becoming more heated and desperate as you wrapped your arms around his neck pulling him closer as your tongues danced back and forth. Hearing a whining you both pulled back looking down at three impatient dogs waiting for the game of fetch to continue. You both laughed Henry kicked the ball without releasing you before leaning down again.

"You have no idea how much I've wanted to do that" he mumbled against your lips placeing chaste kisses on them as he spoke.

" and now I cant seem to stop"

"You think your the only one?" you giggled at him meeting his kisses half way

"Just so you know I expect this to be our greeting from now on love" he whispered lowly and squeezed your waist your tummy fluttered at that.

"Well i suppose thats an acceptable request" you murmured he gave you a mischievous smile.

"Who said anything about request? I'll greet my woman as I see fit" your laugh was cut short as he kissed you deeply again. Before pulling you around one arm slung around your waist as he guided you along the path against him.

"Your woman? you havent even bought me dinner?"

"Which i plan to rectify tonight?" He asked cheekily you nodded at him leaning your head against his chest feeling like the luckiest girl in the world as he looked at you lovingly leaning over kissing your head.

#henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill

395 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 3 years

Text

Dash & Lux

Dash: ☀️🧙🏽‍♀️🎶🥁🎸🪕🧚🏿‍♂️🌿🌼🧚🔮💃💫🔥🕺🏻🌳💗🍯🍻

Lux: That is almost exactly what the inside of my head looks like right now!!!

Lux: Is mind-reading a power that is bestowed upon you believers this eve?! 🤔😲

Dash: Right on

Dash: it’s one of many, trust

Lux: I’m ever sadder I can only be an observer now

Lux: Telepathy would be the most useful!

Dash: you gotta open your 👀 at least twice

Lux: I can 👀 at it, all of it in its splendour, just not participate

Dash: Bummer! What’s got you backing off? You don’t look like no wallflower chick to me

Lux: I got the dress code 🌻🌻🌻

Lux: Sunflowers are so strong-looking for flowers, don’t you think?

Lux: Not dainty and delicate

Lux: Well, I’m a Christian and technically this is a Pagan ritual so it’s a big 🚫🚫

Lux: I am finding it super interesting though

Dash: they don’t look strong, they are, babe 🌻🌻🌻 cleaned up Chernobyl, it’s far out what they can do

Dash: its roots, yeah, but we’re not all pagans here & we all still find something to celebrate, you could do St John the Baptist’s birthday as a christian, bonfires were big for that too

Lux: Whaaaaaaaaaat????! TELL ME MORE

Dash: about 🌻🌻🌻 or 🎂🔥🎇🎆?

Lux: 🌻🌻🌻 birthdays are contentious too

Dash: Helianthus annuus, from the Greek helios, meaning ☀️ they can remove poisonous chemicals & metals from the ground, water or air

Dash: they spread rapidly & can stabilize if not totally clear a field in 3 years, it’s 🤯

Lux: I wish I’d gone to school

Lux: Do you know any more fascinating things?

Lux: That sounds like magic

Dash: the world’s full of magic, but it wasn’t school that taught me to recognize it

Lux: Share the secret, kind sir

Dash: you’ve got the 🔑 & this here’s your kingdom, all you have to do is hang out & stay hip to what you 👀👂👃👅

Dash: 🧠➡️⬅️⬆️⬇️↗️↘️↙️↖️↪️↩️⤴️⤵️

Lux: I’ve 👅 so many wondrous tastes today

Lux: I feel full in so many senses of the word

Lux: How long have you been a member of the kingdom, stranger?

Dash: quest accepted to lay that feeling on you in every sense, then it’ll be a rad celebration

Dash: I’ve been here since I could walk, everywhere else is too big a drag to keep me

Lux: Oh, that’s so kind!

Lux: Everyone is so open and willing to teach me things

Lux: For instance, quick, when’s your birthday, wolf boy

Dash: it’s that kinda space 🦊

Dash: 20th of January 🎂 got me on the cusp ♑♒

Lux: Twins!

Lux: My birthday, which I’ve never celebrated before, is the 20th of March 😱

Lux: Someone, I’m not sure who, was just telling me about the Celtic tree signs

Lux: ‘If you were born in the month of the birch, you probably have a fresh and unusual outlook on life. People born under this Celtic tree astrology sign tend to be highly driven and are always full of zeal and ambition. They always want more and try to reach new horizons and expand their knowledge. Some of the characteristics attributed to the Birch sign are tolerance, toughness, and leadership. The Birch signs can brighten a room with their smile and quickly charm other people’

Lux: Yay or nay 🐺

Dash: you charmed so far or nah? [obviously smiling at her wherever she is as well like heyyy]

Lux: [definition of this emoji 🤭]

Dash: What’s your celtic tree sign?

Lux: ‘Those born under the Alder sign are natural pathfinders. They have the ability to move people and quickly gain followers to their cause. The Alders have a way with words, mingle easily and people love to be around them. They possess a mystic charisma, confidence and strong self-faith. Other character traits are: a good focus on goals and ideas, can’t tolerate fluff and waste.’

Lux: I am unsure but flattered 😊😊😊

Dash: I dig it

Dash: they let you know if we’re compatible? Your ♓♈ cusp makes you mad desirable to all signs

Lux: You need to see who here was born 15th April to 12th May or 2nd September to 29th September

Lux: But it says I’m compatible with you, so how does that work?! 😣

Lux: There’s so much I have to get my head ‘round

Dash: You’re gonna be 🥰💖 for me while I’m 🔍 for a 🐈 or 🐤 born on those dates?

Lux: Hey, that’s way less nice!

Lux: but I can also be looking for people born 13th May to 9th June AND 10th June to 7th July so 😋

Dash: those signs are full of it, trying to make me look uncool but don’t sweat it, I’d never cut you that low, like

Lux: If it’s not in the 💫s I can still say I’m pleased to meet you today as friends, Mowgli

Dash: Look up

Dash: if you don’t see a 🌠 I can show you a 🐺🌟 & 🦊🌟 chasing each other across the sky

Lux: [obviously literally does]

Lux: That’s very Disney 🏰✨

Dash: is that allowed?

Lux: I watched some at a friend’s house one time

Dash: & how was it?

Lux: 😭 but romantic

Dash: Anyone told you the oak king story yet?

Lux: Okay, thank Goodness

Lux: this lady with the dreads and the big back tattoo tried to tell me but I couldn’t understand her 🙊

Lux: Redeem your gentlemanly reputation and save both of us the embarrassment

Lux: Her accent was wild! 🤯

Dash: did her version start with Fadó, fadó?

Dash: wouldn’t be a wild guess

Lux: I won’t credit you with any telepathic skills this time, then

Lux: also I’d need to 👂 it again to confirm fully but yes, I think so

Dash: [send her an utterly unnecessary voice memo]

Lux: It sounds more intriguing when you say it

Dash: [obviously gotta tell her the full story in an irish voice memo purely for the #flex and the flirt cos you know damn well you’re gonna have to translate it, boy]

Lux: 🤩

Lux: Did you learn that here too?

Lux: I’ve lived so many different places and yet I only know the one language

Dash: My ma started it but when the establishment took over it was a bad scene & turned me off for time, last few years here it felt groovy again having that connection & I refound the 💚☘️

Lux: It’s really cool

Lux: it sounds old, or like elvish or something else not real

Dash: it’s a trip, you’ve gotta get someone to teach you while your fly by lasts

Lux: Oh, I live here 😊

Lux: I room with Nora, do you know her?

Dash: Beats me, what’s her deal?

Lux: Her and her brother Finley have been here for a while, but not forever like you

Lux: but there are a lot of people here so I’m not surprised you’re not sure 😅

Dash: not a clue but loads of people are too rattled to wanna get involved, could be her vibe

Dash: or she just ain’t outta sight like you

Lux: She’s totally involved, she secured like all of the sunflowers for today

Lux: well, me and Amber helped but she was definitely the most enthusiastic

Dash: 🌻👑! I do know her, but her in with Amber & instant karma means she’s not gonna mess around with me

Lux: Ooh, what did you do

Dash: jack, Amber’s hassling me cos I’m not trying to be her old man, she gets super rash & things get heavy with 0 slack

Lux: Hmm I shouldn’t have asked 🤐🙉

Dash: ask her why she’s making a move on my older bro now if not to try & lay a trip on me, babe’s lost it

Lux: Whaaaaaaa

Lux: You have a brother?!

Lux: Is he invisible?

Dash: I wish

Lux: Which one is he, point him out

Dash: [points in the direction of their house lol]

Lux: [a face of understanding like oh okay]

Lux: How does Amber know him then?

Dash: from stalking me

Lux: I don’t think she would do that

Lux: She must’ve just bumped into him or something

Dash: at my house, yeah

Lux: It’s cool, it’s not really my business

Dash: open 👀 like I said

Lux: 📖

Dash: that too 🧠💗🤲

Lux: I can agree with that sentiment

Dash: we’re groovy then

Lux: Of course 😊

Lux: enjoy your evening

Dash: back at you, golden girl ☀️🎇👸🏼

Lux: I like your outfit too

Lux: it’s very ☀️🧙🏽‍♀️🎶🥁🎸🪕🧚🏿‍♂️🌿🌼🧚🔮💃💫🔥🕺🏻🌳💗🍯🍻

Dash: [comes over and ties a chain of flowers around her wrist like it’s a friendship bracelet energy]

Lux: [clearly delighted with this]

Dash: [ask her if she wants to dance even though you know damn well she’s only observing because kind of boy you are]

Lux: [so rude lowkey when she’s struggling so hard with what she does and doesn’t believe now, we’re in enough of a dilemma without your help but there we go; thus we will go dance with you because we do want to and we can make arguments that that isn’t joining in with the rituals of it all]

Dash: [he’s lucky Amber is busy because she would fight him, but instead enjoy your dance you two]

Lux: [the audacity of your lies about her, we were so awkward like 😬 anyway, we will have a nice dance though]

Dash: [such a dickhead he can only be humbled by fire, full offense Nora because we’re ignoring you hen cos you’re clearly wise to his bs]

Lux: [there’s clearly a growing group of gals who are unimpressed by your nonsense and that will be interesting to navigate]

Dash: [Definitely, but yeah probably do slip away like a snek before any of those gals do kick your ass]

Lux: 🎃👠🐁🌠🕛

Dash: A 📘 for the 🔥

Lux: 🤔?

Dash: it’s a drag, all that heavy shit with her fam is a bummer, she gets to split but only til 🕛 that’s some 🌠

Lux: Yeah, it’s enough to get help though and then she gets saved

Dash: nah, to get shafted, she don’t get to dance with anyone else there, it’s a scam

Lux: 😅 who else does she need, she’s got the prince, silly!

Dash: someone who recognizes her next day?

Lux: Touche 😏

Lux: Being a 🤴 is a lot of work

Dash: What 🤴 told you that?

Lux: Where to begin

Lux: I’ve known several who would say as much and the 👸s would never disagree

Dash: Fadó, fadó, fadó a bhí ann…

Dash: but I’d shut it down from the beginning, they gotta be shining you on

Lux: I’m going to have to have translate open constantly, I see 😰

Lux: but very noble

Dash: I try, like you & your ☘️ it’s chill we’ve all got your back

Lux: It would be way worse if it was the only language any of you spoke

Lux: thank goodness 😅

Lux: there’s lots more that’s more pertinent for me to get a grip on

Dash: 🧝🧝🏻‍♀️🧝🏽🧝🏾‍♀️

Dash: we’ve got you on the rest too, like, goes without saying

Lux: Most everyone has been super welcoming

Dash: how long have you lived here?

Lux: Not long enough that that’s insulting 😋

Lux: but gosh, a couple of weeks? Must be

Dash: nah I meant cos I don't wanna explain to you what sorta place this is like you're fresh through the door if you've had loads of time to find your own way

Lux: Oh no, I’m a total n00b

Lux: Hazel got me here but I’ve kinda just been left to it since

Lux: Anything you wanna tell me would be appreciated

Dash: did Amber or Nora give you the tour?

Lux: Amber’s been super busy and Nora likes to stay in our room mostly

Dash: not super welcoming

Dash: but it’s no sweat, I’ll show you round, we’ll have a blast

Lux: they’ve both got their own stuff going on, I don’t expect them to drop it for me

Lux: but that would still be cool, thank you!

Dash: say when

Dash: it’ll be as electric under the ☀️ as the 🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔🌙

Lux: I can 👀 in the dark

Lux: You choose

Lux: find me when you’ve stopped having the MOST fun?

Dash: 🐺🐾🦊

Dash: Meet me in the orchard at midnight, ditching your shoes before

Dash: there’s an 🍏🌳🍎 you can 👀 the whole farm from the top of

Lux: And you’ll remember what I look like?

Dash: you look unreal

Dash: unforgettable

Lux: I got creative with the arts and crafts 🌟⚡️☀️

Lux: I’ve always made my own clothes

Lux: well, I made them for my sisters before

Lux: looking unforgettable was not the end goal there though

Lux: that was for secret

Dash: my nan would be hip to you, she used to make her own clothes, for her girl & her sister too when they wanted, it’s still a vibe for her

Lux: I will make her something then

Lux: what’s her style?

Dash: indescribable

Dash: I’ll show you pics

Lux: Awkward if your nan is cuter than you

Dash: at our age she totally was

Lux: Awh, you’re so sweet

Lux: I have nothing nice to say about my meemaw

Dash: keep it for mine when you meet her

Lux: You’re gonna introduce me to your nan? 😊

Dash: right on, she’ll wanna put whatever you make on for you to 👀 & it’s only a few fields over

Lux: 🏞 it’s a crazy beautiful spot to live, that’s for sure

Lux: so you live with her?

Dash: Yeah, my ma grew up there & when my parents called it quits she wanted to move back

Lux: You’re close-knit

Lux: that’s special

Dash: closer than I am to my da

Lux: Does that upset you?

Dash: I don’t let it upset my equilibrium, he’s uptight, that’s his problem not mine

Lux: I understand

Lux: I don’t agree with my dad on a lot of things

Lux: it’s still sad though

Dash: I got killer people round me, a 2nd family here accepting me for who I am, it ain’t cool he don’t, but they give me what I need

Lux: I’m happy for you

Lux: Seriously

Lux: again, that’s special, you should be really grateful

Dash: I am, believe me

Dash: you’re gonna scope out how special it is here now I’m in charge of showing you everything

Lux: I’d love to see your 🌍 how you see it

Lux: Kinda sounds like everything I need, honestly

Dash: you can, easily when we’re sharing a branch

Lux: 🧚‍♀️ you’re dainty, I trust you won’t let me fall

Dash: I’ll let you fall into something good though, new heights

Lux: Will it hurt?

Dash: no way

Lux: You aren’t pranking me, are you?

Dash: there’s no plastic on me, I’m being real with you

Lux: If you’re gonna try and jump me out in the orchard I’ll have to show you crazy and I really can’t afford to lose this place okay

Lux: so if I believe you right now and you were lying, it’ll be worse than it would’ve been, you feel me?

Dash: Hurting you isn’t my action, I’m about a gentler touch than that

Lux: and I’m not a bully, that’s not my vibe so that’s the warning out of the way

Dash: avenging 👼 I get it

Lux: My costume has you fooled, I think

Dash: Wait, so you’re pranking me?

Lux: No, I swear! 😅

Lux: I don’t feel like I’ve been anywhere near as nice to you as you have to me though

Dash: but you did dance with me & that was choice

Lux: I wanted to

Dash: me too, I wasn’t asking just to be nice

Lux: even though you’re very nice

Lux: I believe that

Dash: I think we’re getting somewhere

Lux: You understand why I’d find a boy like you being interested in me dubious at first, right

Dash: Nah, but I’m listening

Lux: Well it’s embarrassing to say

Dash: alright, listen, I think you’re the most

Dash: I’m embarrassed I’ve not met you before tonight

Lux: There are so many people to meet

Lux: and you’re like the 🤴 of this place, huh

Lux: you have to dance with all the ugly stepsisters too

Dash: if Amber said write that to bait me I’m shutting up

Lux: I think Amber left 🤔

Lux: And who’s calling her ugly, even if you guys have beef, like no way

Dash: & Nora’s gotta be back in your room cos that’s her bag, yeah?

Dash: so where are you?

Lux: I’m in the middle of [one hippie activity] and [another]

Dash: [go find her and dance with her again obvs, we can be bolder about if some of the haters are gone and it’s later so he’s clearly a bit more drunk/high by now too]

Lux: [the way you’re probably sober like how lmao, not saying you always are or will be ‘cos no but gotta have our wits about us ‘cos witchery is afoot; but yeah we all know it can shamelessly way more of a Thing™]

Dash: [at least Amber was too until her row with the bae even if she wasn’t the most present in other ways, so it wasn’t just you gal, but yeah, dispel any remaining fears she may have that you’re not into this please boy with this moment]

Lux: [we know you got your own going on, it’s good, this drama has to happen whether you like it or not babe sorryyyy, when you’re then even more into it because it’s like HELLO IS THIS ALLOWED, so new and fresh to get to remotely be this brazen]

Dash: [shouldn’t LOVE that for you but I do, we should probably let y’all go on your tour then because we’re both in a mood and there’s nobody to separate you]

Lux: [probably, but I will insist on making you wait ‘til midnight regardless]

Dash: [it is a fat mood and I did pick that time deliberately so yeah, dance the night away first hens]

Lux: [sure it’s probably near that time anyways]

Dash: [yeah absolutely]

Lux: [we can skip to the after in this if you like?]

Dash: [are we thinking am like did y’all fall asleep together or?]

Lux: [Hmm, do we go with the Cinderella and have her bounce or do we go against it and not, because then she would think he wasn’t a dick later]

Dash: [even though he’s a dick I still want all the cute I can grab with my smol hands]

Lux: [it’s not like you can’t be like I just fell asleep it’s nbd with it so yeah okay

Dash: [I also like the camber parallel of it all so]

Lux: [true true, we can do it, then you can just have breakfast as a group because duh, was it sunday or monday today?]

Dash: [I think it’s sunday aka Cosmo is having his 2nd date with Ruby tonight and then Camber breakfast dates start monday]

Lux: [okay then you will have to think of a creative way to ditch her then boy hohaha]

Dash: [at least he can just go home because Amber only stayed to angrily eat some fruit and Cosmo had a busy day ahead because I doubt the shower situation at this commune is thriving, water probably runs out always]

Lux: [what a poser lmaooo]

Dash: [and very rude not to invite her when she probably wants to shower or bathe too]

Lux: [we literally got gems stuck to our face but pop off]

Dash: [we know you’re not because your mother is there and sick of your behaviour but yes, it wouldn’t kill you to let her boy]

Lux: [no offence but run him over, anyway, some time later]

Lux: are you ⬇️🍄?

Dash: 🛹⚡️

Lux: aha, cool

Lux: good thing you didn’t invite me I’d end up 🤕 for sure

Dash: I didn’t stop you falling out of a tree last night to have you fall off a board later in the AM

Lux: Hey, you make it sound like I was 🤏 close! 😆

Dash: nah, your balance is sound

Lux: I don’t recall you stepping on my toes, either

Dash: don’t wanna have to start the day off doubting your 🍒 recall, that’d be a bad scene

Lux: I was totally sober thank you 😅

Dash: easy to claim the magic’s all you when I ain’t met you before but I’m a believer

Lux: Wait, was that a compliment or a diss?

Lux: Maybe I’m contact-wasted

Dash: contact with Nora would get you more sober, there’s a diss

Lux: Awh, don’t be mean!

Lux: She’s been really nice

Dash: chill out, I’m only playing

Lux: Hmm 😏

Lux: anyway, what are you doing later?

Dash: I said I’d hang with Yara

Lux: Oh cool, who’s that?

Dash: I’ll introduce you after

Lux: after what?

Dash: we’re done messing around

Lux: wow, alrighty then

Dash: you’ll like her, she’s a trip

Lux: I’m not totally sure she’d want you to 💬 that

Lux: or I’ll know what to 💬 now

Dash: it’s no biggie

Lux: idk, this is not the way I was raised

Lux: you say it’s not but idk, you know

Dash: you don’t have to meet her

Lux: Yeah

Dash: I think she’s rad but you gotta make up your own mind

Lux: It’s not about her

Dash: nah, you, I understand where you’re coming from, it’s a new world

Lux: Right, it seems really icky to me that you’d tell me any of this

Lux: it’s not about how rad she could be

Dash: Come on, Lux, I’m keeping this honest

Lux: I guess

Lux: Why do you need to tell me though, I don’t get it, for real?

Dash: I like you, I don’t want it to get twisted

Dash: 📖

Lux: Okay, I appreciate the sentiment then

Dash: I’ll come find you later, on my own

Lux: That’s okay

Lux: I’ve got lots of chores to catch up on

Dash: they’ll be done faster if I help you

Lux: I can’t stop you

Lux: the place is a mess after last night and the more people who pitch in the better

Dash: I don’t get why you’d wanna stop me

Lux: I don’t really wanna hang out now, not today anyway

Dash: I can’t believe you’re being like this

Lux: Being like what?

Dash: Amber

Lux: I’m not

Lux: you can’t hang out now, I can’t hang out later, how is it any different?

Dash: the way I’m travelling through today is a straight line, yours is all over the place

Lux: Good for you?

Lux: It doesn’t matter either way though

Dash: doing a u turn on me does matter

Lux: It does?

Lux: because last night you thought I was rad, so obviously this morning I wanted to hang out with you again, so I think it’s my turn to do the 180, if you think about it

Dash: I still think you are, last night was unreal & we can be again, I’m just asking you to take 5 cos I can’t split on Yara after making plans time ago

Lux: That’s fine, it’s not fine to be mad at me ‘cos I ask you to take 5 too

Lux: that makes it make no sense

Dash: I’m not mad at you, I’m trying to make sense of why you’re mad at me

Lux: I’m not mad at you, I’m upset

Lux: You only need to ask

Dash: idk I didn’t think this would go down how it is

Lux: Me either, I guess

Dash: you for real want space?

Lux: I don’t know

Lux: Can I get back to you on that?

Dash: yeah

Lux: I wanted to see you again

Lux: I thought you’d want to see me too

Dash: I do, you read me right last night, why are you gonna start disbelieving yourself today?

Lux: You want to see Yara more

Dash: I wanna see her too

Lux: Okay, have fun then

Dash: we cool?

Lux: I don’t know

Dash: idk what's turned you different, you were laying it on me like you got it, how I'm

like royalty & everyone wants a piece of my time

Lux: Oh my Gosh

Lux: I wasn’t being serious and I didn’t think you were

Lux: do you honestly think that, like what?

Dash: It's a touch plastic saying I'm like 👑 but still close to how it is

Lux: Um, you don’t even live here

Lux: you have a whole house and family

Dash: I'm here with my chosen family as much as I can be

Lux: Yeah, but what do you

actually do for this place, or anyone here?

Lux: The audacity to act like it’s your kingdom, that’s laughable and gross all at once

Dash: back off babe, I do whatever they need me to do

Lux: Babe-ing me right now isn’t a good look

Lux: manual labour at best makes you help, not visiting royalty

Lux: are you crazy, like, who do you think you are, seriously I’m so curious

Dash: Who are you? Thinking you can lay this trip on me about what I can & can't do

Lux: I’m not telling you you can or can’t do anything

Lux: I asked you not to call me babe, which is basic politeness

Dash: nah, you're telling me I don't belong to this place

Dash: questioning how I do like

it's up to you

Lux: I said you don’t live here, and you don’t

Lux: and I’ve never seen you contribute, maybe you were super busy before I got here, then I’ll apologize for that

Dash: you're doing a census, yeah? Hold up [everyone currently who doesn't live her like the petty prince he is]

Dash: I've got family here, they all keep me busy

Lux: Cool? Thanks for telling me who else is a tourist ???

Lux: You’re just being defensive, there’s no need if you’re secure in that and your place here

Dash: quit trying to rattle me

Lux: I’m truly not

Lux: but no, we’re not cool now

Dash: I made it known from the top where I live

Lux: Where you live isn’t the issue

Dash: what's your issue? I'm loved & welcomed here, that's all I said

Lux: That’s nice

Lux: I don’t really want to discuss my issue with you, with you, right now, if that’s okay

Dash: later then

Lux: See you around, Dash

Dash: I can't believe you think I'm a flake, this has me totally unglued, you know

Lux: I don’t feel great about it either

Dash: how can I make you feel less bummed out?

Dash: your tour was the most far out I've ever given

Lux: I don’t think you can, it’s done now

Lux: I just need some time to change what I thought this was, or was gonna be, in my head

Lux: but thanks, for offering

Dash: take your time to 👀 what we can be & how you wanna evolve

Lux: Maybe we can be friends later on

Dash: I’d dig it

Lux: I liked talking to you last night

Dash: I felt more connected to you than I usually do

Lux: I don’t think you’re an awful person, FYI

Lux: I just think you could’ve been clearer, and accept that you hurt me without getting way defensive, you know?

Lux: I can accept you didn’t mean to

Dash: I thought I was being clear

Lux: Yeah, I know

Lux: I’m from a very different background and place, it just didn’t translate well, clearly

Dash: yeah

Lux: but I thought I’d put that across well enough that you got that too

Dash: I do get you, but I can’t 180 myself to fit

Lux: No, I’m not asking you to fit my understanding, it’s fine you don’t

Dash: What are you asking?

Lux: Nothing, honestly, I’m trying to explain why I’m upset

Lux: Just like you can’t 180, I can’t change how I see and feel about it immediately, even if some of the ways I were raised are outdated or potentially bad, you know

Lux: You don’t need to do anything

Lux: From my perspective, it felt like a 180 and hurtful to tell me about hooking up with someone else the morning after

Lux: I know how you think and operate is totally different, but that’s it

Dash: but I wanna do something, to help you

Lux: You are nice…

Lux: I don’t know though, what would help?

Dash: I meant what I said last night about showing you this place, making it feel more like a home, how it is for me

Lux: Maybe you could come back and help with the chores

Lux: I shouldn’t have said you NEVER help out, I’ve not been here long enough to make that observation

Dash: maybe it looks like I don’t, cos with family you take liberties sometimes, that kid who’s naughty at home & don’t say shit at school, comfortable to play up

Lux: I have 8 brothers, I understand 😅

Dash: you can have that too, should

Lux: I did, as much as any of us did

Lux: I was a boy, remember

Dash: with 0 limits though, people trying to control & change what you do is for outside of here, I don’t have to think in my dad’s 🟥🟧🟨🟩🟦🟪⬛️⬜️🟫 way or do what my ma reckons is righteous

Lux: Sounds idyllic, Dash

Dash: it is

Lux: You have to understand my experience of people doing exactly what they want means someone is being exploited or abused for that person’s privilege

Lux: my parents had their utopia at the price of the things we wanted, needed

Dash: that’s why you need this new experience

Lux: Okay

Lux: I do want new experiences

Dash: the farm has the magic to grant you whatever you’re here for, no wish is the wrong size

Lux: You really seem to believe it so I will try too 😊

Dash: I’m about to 🛹⚡️ back if you wanna clean the opposite end or hide from me in the 🍏🌳🍎

Lux: That’s cool

Lux: but thanks for the warning 💗

Dash: don’t let how out of this world you look distract me then

Lux: I so don’t so that won’t be an issue 😌

Dash: It's an accident, huh? I feel you, it must be my fault I can’t look away

Lux: You’re way too smooth for your own good

Lux: but I wouldn’t say that’s a fault, necessarily 🤭

Dash: Hey, I didn’t manifest you into being, even if last night did feel like it had to be cosmically devined somehow

Lux: I felt it too

Lux: no one has ever

Lux: not like that anyway

Dash: you’re like a song I can’t get out of my head, I don’t want it to turn sad

Dash: I’m sorry I got you unglued too

Lux: It’s a lot more complicated than just you

Lux: it’s a whole thing

Dash: You’re gonna find people to share how heavy it is

Lux: 🤞

Dash: they’ll carry you through & even if it’s Amber I won’t let it bug me

Lux: I’m sure that’s a misunderstanding

Lux: I could talk to her? Subtly, of course

Dash: yeah, her misunderstanding me, you’ve got your reasons, she’s not new to any of this

Dash: her problem is she thinks she’s the most & everyone else should think she’s choice no matter what

Lux: Do you think she likes your brother?

Dash: no way, unless she’s got a football obsession now too

Lux: 🧲 maybe

Dash: idk

Lux: Me either

Lux: it just seems a bit crazy otherwise

Dash: he’s as uptight as my da, she’s never gonna get nowhere trying to mess around with him, whatever she’s doing it for

Lux: She won’t have any problem finding someone new

Lux: you said he’s older, right?

Dash: not loads, but he’s gonna be done with school in a sec

Lux: I see

Lux: so you’re the 👶

Dash: til my dad’s new lady puts her demands in

Dash: how many sisters you got to go with your 8 bros?

Lux: you don’t like her at all, huh

Lux: and 5, so they had a tough job being outnumbered

Dash: you heard of a WAG? That’s her whole deal

Dash: whoa, so you had a full time secret sewing job

Lux: yes, we lived in England for a while, that’s how I ended up here

Lux: like a Kardashian, I can see you not having a lot to bond over

Lux: exactly 😂

Dash: you gotta teach me, my nan would be jazzed

Lux: I’d love to!

Lux: there’s a surplus of old clothes to practice on

Dash: still a chore, we get to skip cleaning, yeah?

Lux: Mending isn’t as fun as creating but you’ve got to start somewhere so, I think so 😊

Dash: 😁

Dash: we’ll have a blast cos I gotta start somewhere on earning your forgiveness too

Lux: You’re sweet, Dash

Dash: I’m being for real

Lux: I know you are

Lux: I don’t know what to say though because I’m awkward 😳

Dash: it’s a hands on kinda task & you already know what you’re doing with it, it’ll be me feeling 😳

Lux: No flirting, only crafting

Dash: 🧷📏🧵✂️🧶📍✨

Lux: That’s a very impressive emoji selection

Dash: missing 😍💞🥰💓😘💘 but it’s chill

Lux: Idiot 😏

Dash: 💟 is the compromise

Lux: Okay, that’s adorable

Lux: allowed 🤭

Dash: [show up and take her hand to lead her off to sew, we know you weren’t far away bitch]

Lux: [the way you just melt when he shows, oh gal]

Dash: [I’m upset about it]

Lux: [we know you really like him, for better and worse rn]

Dash: [thank god he does actually like you and it’s not a straight up Drew and Ro situation happening]

Lux: [we can only do that ‘cos they both lowkey suck so we aren’t sad lmao]

Dash: [I like this gal too much to be that evil]

Lux: [it’s drama enough without it being entirely one-sided like no lol]

Dash: [I hope some sewing does take place amidst the blatant flirting because learn a useful skill for once in your life dickhead]

Lux: [we aren’t gonna just roll over immediately ‘cos actually did upset us so you will have to]

Dash: [yay]

Lux: [so that’s probably the vibe for today ‘cos yeah we absolutely won’t even though it’s clear we still like you like that too, so you’ll just have to hang out platonically]

Dash: [it’s gotta be the vibe for a while, sucks to suck boy, but obviously hang out until that girl comes to find you because you clearly do also wanna hang out with her platonically it’s not just like that vine where he breaks the skateboard]

Lux: [a quality vine]

Dash: [do we wanna leave this here?]

Lux: [I think we can]

1 note · View note

pixelatedrose · 4 years

Text

Soulbound Part Two

First | Part 2 | Next

Ao3 link

Masterpost

Word Count: 2,955

Pairings: Platonic LAMP, Prinxiety, Logicality, Background Remile

Warnings: uncensored swearing, bullying, mention of drugs and alcohol, threats, Unsympathetic Remus, Unsympathetic Deceit, implied mention of sex (wow this fic went from 1 to like 67 real fast) Please leave a comment and tell me if I missed anything that should be tagged or if you want anything tagged!

Summary:

Roman Prince and Logan Rose are soulmates. They’re platonic soulmates though. They both have the same Soul mark to prove it. But they both have one other soul mark, binding them to one other person. And when they find Patton Miles, it just so happens that they’re both his soulmate. Logan being his Soulbound Soulmate, and Roman being a platonic soulmate. But something feels missing. And it feels filled, shockingly so, when they meet a certain someone a year and a half after they found each other.

IMPORTANT NOTE!! I changed all of their last names cause I didn't like them. So. Yeah. Also sorry this seems a bit late, I got caught up with doing things and school and we had a ton of snow (where I live we never get snow) and so I was a little distracted all week. Sorry about that y'all!! But its here now, so yeah!! Hope you enjoy!!

Chapter 2

Roman woke up with a start, his wrist stinging. He looked over at his clock that read a time much to late- or early- for it to be reasonable. He rubbed his stinging skin and tried to go back to sleep.

This was a regular occurrence. Waking up at two am to a stinging wrist or shoulder, sometimes an ankle or forearm. Once he woke up nearly screaming as his left side felt like it was on fire.

He didn't quite know what it was, but Roman never thought much about it. I mean, people woke up with little pricks sometimes, right? He'd probably slept on it wrong or accidentally hit his bedframe in his sleep.

Roman lay in bed, tossing and turning as he tried to fall back asleep. He looked over to the clock once again and sighed. It was only an hour before his alarm went off.

Not seeing the point in trying to go to sleep anymore, Roman swung his legs over the side of his bed and started getting ready for the day.

After taking a shower and pulling in clothes, Roman's alarm rang out two seconds after he was done styling and drying his previously wet hair. He slapped it off as quick as possible, suddenly not wanting to wake anyone else up.

Roman inched out of his room and into his brother's, flipping on the lights, much to his brother's dismay.

"Turn the goddamn lights off…." His brother muttered through his pillow.

Roman sighed. "Nope! C'mon Remus, it's time for you to rise and shine- or whatever it is that you do when you're awake- and get ready for the first day of school!" He walked over to the broad window and threw open the blinds, letting light filter and flow into the already lot room, the sun beams hitting Roman's twin in the face.

"AaaAAAHH!!" His brother screamed. He sat up in bed and shielded his face. He glared at Roman after adjusting to the light. "I'm going to sell your organs on the internet you pile of horse sh-"

"Love you too, brother! I'm gonna go make breakfast now okay bye!!" Roman zipped downstairs, not wanting to stick around to see whether his brother would act on that threat or not.

Ten minutes later Remus came loudly down the stairs and yelled at his brother. "DID YOU GET OUT ALL THE CEREAL AND THE POPTARTS?!!?"

Roman sighed, looking at the counter that was overflowing with four different cereals and a box of poptarts. "YEAH BRO MAN I GOTCHU!!" He yelled back.

Remus entered the kitchen area with his heavy heeled boots and skipped over to the cereals. He poured a little of each box into a bowl and unwrapped a poptart and crumbled it on top. He went to the fridge and pulled out a carton of not milk but orange juice and poured it into the abomination that was in his bowl.

Roman looked away and tried focusing back on the eggs he had in the pan in front of him. "I cannot believe that you actually eat that, Remus! It's revolting!" Roman bemused.

Remus shoveled a spoonful into his mouth, staring at pointedly. "You," he sputtered through the mouthful of 'Cereal'. "My brother, have no taste." He swallowed and gestured to his bowl. "This is a masterpiece of a meal!!"

Roman made gagging noise and slid his single solitary egg onto a piece of toast. "That's not even a meal! I daresay it would harm someone rather than anything else!"

Remus scoffed and took another bite.

~~•~~

Today was the first day of their sophomore year, 10th grade and they couldn't wait for it to start. Or at least, Roman was excited. Remus had made his opinion adamant; he couldn't care less if the school caught fire.

But nonetheless, it was a day they'd all been awaiting, whether eagerly or with disdain.

Patton had stuffed his backpack full of snacks and colorful pins as gifts for his new classmates and friends.

Roman had excitedly roused his voice in preparation for theater and barber shop choir he was sure to audition for.

Logan had packed up notebooks and pencils and pens, all fitting perfectly in his backpack as he awaited learning, a year ahead of his peers.

Remus had done nothing but think up pranks and plans of destruction of freshman newbies for the start of the year. His phone pinged and he picked it up to look at it.

A boy known around school as Deceit had discretely packed his bag and pockets full of liquors and drugs to sell to anyone who'd buy. He looked at his email and raised an eyebrow. He turned to his messages and shot a text to his partner.

And a person of seemingly infinitesimal importance shrugged on a black and purple jacket and sighed heavily. He didn't look forward to this. What's to say it was going to be any different from last time?

And so, life started as sophomores for each and every one of them.

~~•~~

Virgil Sanders walked up to the front of his new high school. A place to start over… he thought.

He pushed his way through the doors and tried to think positively.

"Well helloooo there my good newbie of a kid!!" A voice rang out. Virgil startled back and bumped into someone behind him. How did someone get behind him so fast??

"Ah, ah! Don't be scared my good pal!" The person behind him said, his voice was a little too reassuring, a little too happy.

"I-I'm sorry...I'll just find my own way around…" he stammered out. He didn't want to try and be cocky and make enemies this early into the school year. And his anxiety was telling him to play it safe.

He didn't even see the two that were harassing him before a voice trilled out, "Oh there you are, babe!!"

Virgil felt an arm wrap around his shoulders. "Hon-ey you've got to stop running off like that! Gurl, you're gonna lose that cute purple head of yours in the crowd if your not careful!" Virgil looked up to see a boy wearing aviator shades and a leather jacket.

"Uhm--?"

Virgil started before the sunglasses'd guy turned and whispered in his ear, "Just play along, babe…"

"Right…" Virgil turned and kissed the strange man's cheek. "Sorry babe, won't happen again." He cuddled up to the man and wrapped his arms around his waist. If he was gonna play the part, might as well make it convincing.

"That's right honey bae! Now let's get you to class!" And the two walked away hand in hand.

As they rounded the corner, the man parted from Virgil and turned on him. "Sorry bout that honey, but gurl you were in real danger there!" He held out a hand. "The name's Remy b-t-dubs."

Virgil shook it. "Virgil. Thanks. And sorry for the kiss."

Remy laughed and waved his hand at Virgil. "Oh pah-lease babe! Trust me I probably enjoyed that more than you think I did!" He winked and laughed again at Virgil's flushed face. "Now, stay outa trouble, ya hear? Cause auntie Remy ain't always gonna be around to save that cute face of yours hun. But here's my number in case you need anything!" Remy took out what looked like a business card and handed it to Virgil.

Auntie Remy. Gossip wheel, late night counseling, party boy.

At the bottom a number was printed. "Hey what-" but Remy was already gone.

What just happened?

~~•~~

Remus was pissed. He had received the text from Deceit that morning that there was fresh meat and he was so ready to spill crickets in that loser's bag! And then that stupid 12th grade dumbass senior Remy had to show up and "save the day."

His eye caught a little freshman boy with broken glasses. He carried his books in his arms and had a smattering of freckles to accompany his bright red hair.

Perfect! Remus thought maliciously. And crept over to sink his teeth into his next victim.

"Hey there freckle face!" He called cheerily.

The boy seemed startled and pointed at himself as if to confirm.

Remus sighed. Wow this kid is dull… "Yeah you, scarecrow reject! Now Imma make this quick since I already lost one lunch income," he started, slinking around the kid. "Hand over the money you mommy gave you for food today else I'll make sure that it won't stay down."

The redhead seemed flustered. "Wh-what? B-but, I need that money!" He subconsciously reached for his pocket.

Bingo. Remus knew his type. Fear would get him what he wanted. He grabbed the kid by the front of his shirt, making the books tumble out of his hands. "Listen here, nerd! You gimme that money or else you're gonna be using it to mend all the bones I'll be snapping in you hand, here!" Remus held up one of the kid's spindly hands as an example, wagging it loosely in his face. His maniacal smile grew as he heard the kid whimper in fear.

Remus put pressure on one of the kid's fingers as the freckled boy didn't move. "Tic-Toc, brainless bastard!" He snickered sadistically.

"Fine!!" The kid yelped in fear and shoved the money at the bully. "Just leave me alone!"

Remus pushed the kid to the ground and shoved the money in his pocket. "As you wish, orange peel!" He stepped on the kid's discarded books and walked over to where Deceit watched.

"40-60, my snake bitch." Remus said, handing his partner 14 dollars of the 35.

Deceit counted the money and nodded. "I'm disappointed the newbie slipped by us…" he looked off at where the purple haired boy had been a few minutes prior. "But I think he'll be back…" His amber eyes glowed a near sickly yellow. "And this time we're playing the long game."

~~•~~

Remus had run off ahead of him so Roman entered the school's doors alone. He had wandered only a few steps inside before a blur of blue and gold barreled into him.

"GOOD TO SEE YOU, KIDDO!!" Patton shouted, squeezing Roman in an impossibly tight hug.

"Gah!! Good to see you too, Patton!! But," Roman gasped out, smiling. "I can't breathe, buddy."

"Oh my GOLLY gee!!" Patton shouted, releasing Roman into open air. "I'm sorry bout that, kiddo!"

"Really Patton, you should know your own strength by now. It'd be quite a shame if I lost my best friend before we graduated." A deep voice called, his voice laced with amusement.

Roman softly pushed Patton aside. "Logan!!" He shouted and subsequently barreled into the tall boy, retracting after a right squeeze to just a shoulder hug. "Buddy, it's good to see you!" He laughed.

Patton made a noise and the two boys turned to look at the shorter one. "And it's not good to see me?! I'm offended! Roman! I am your father-"

"Not my father-"

"And you will love me right now!"

Roman laughed and drew Patton and Logan both into a tight hug. "Man I missed you guys!!"

Logan gently wrapped his arms around the other two and smiled. "As did we, my friend. As did We."

~~•~~

It was like any other start of school day. Read syllabus, play a get to know you game, repeat.

It was really fairly normal for Roman.

Until his third period.

Roman knew nearly everyone in his grade, he had been the popular kid back in middle school and that had mostly transferred when he got into high school. So when roll call was being taken, it piqued his interest when a foreign voice answered a foreign name.

"Roman Prince?"

"You called?" Roman asked charmingly. The teacher looked at him tiredly. Roman cleared his throat. "Here!" He called a little more calmly.

"Flora Riley?"

"Here!"

"Uh...Virgil Sanders?"

Virgil Sanders? Roman thought. Maybe I just don't remember him and I'll recognize his vio-

"Here." A quiet but firm voice answered and Roman checked behind him to see the source of the unrecognized voice.

A boy sat in the back of the class with his feet pressed up against the table, curling himself mostly into a ball in his chair. But even so, Roman could see purple hair peeking out from under his patchwork hoodie and stylish, iconic reverse eyeshadow applied to his face. His ripped black jeans and scuffed combat boots made it obvious that there was a new emo in school.

Cute… Roman thought subconsciously. I mean, he was pretty cute.

"Alright class. We're gonna play a get to know you game. Now come up and draw sticks." The teacher held out a tin full of stocks with names on them and shook it slightly, letting the wood jingle against the run. "You'll be drawing the person you'll be sitting with for the rest of the semester. You may not trade with anyone, and yeah, that sucks but so does school." The class snickered as people drew sticks. There were only enough for half the class, and the other half drew the sticks.

Roman was not part of the group that drew sticks. So he sat idly at his seat and began to daydream about how the year would go.

"You're Roman Prince?" A voice asked.

Roman snapped out of his dreaming and looked up to see Virgil the Emo standing over him. Roman smirked and out a hand to his chest. "The one and only! Come to admire how pretty I am?" He asked charmingly.

The emo snorted. "As in pretty dull? Maybe. It is a wonder of the world after all."

Roman scoffed and pressed his other hand over his heart, as if it hurt. "I'm offended! You wound me!!" Roman held out his hand smiling. "I assume we're seating partners then! How do you do, my emo nightmare?"

Virgil didn't take his hand, rather he just walked to the back of the class. "Come now, Prince of the Preppy, we don't know each other and honestly I don't think we ever will. We're not sitting up front."

Roman frowned at the lack of jest in the emo's voice. He thought he and the purple haired boy were flirting wonderfully!

Since Roman didn't seem to have any other Soul Marks, he didn't have a Soulbound Soulmate. So he freely flirted with every moving thing that breathed.

But Roman wasn't going to give up that easily. "Hey there, plum hair! Tell me, what's it like looking so fruity?"

Virgil snorted, and hid his face in his sleeve.

Nooo!! Roman thought. I wanna see your cute face!!

"I dunno...what's it like being so fruity?"

Roman laughed and tried again to reach out his hand. "An absolute delight!"

When Virgil did nothing but sit down at the table in the farthest back corner of the classroom, Roman deflated a little. This Virgil was cute, albeit a little annoying. I mean all he would do is snark at him! Maybe Roman had misread the situation.

"Fine alright," Roman have up. "I'll stop talking, panic-at-the-everywhere."

"Sweet." Though it was the answer he should have been expecting, Roman prickled.

"So you don't want to talk to me at all?" Roman asked flatly, slightly annoyed.

"No, not really." Virgil said, pulling out his phone.

"Really? Like really Really?"

"Yep." He popped the P and pointedly turned away from Roman.

"Are you kidding me?"

"Nope." He again popped the P.

"You know we're going to have to sit next to each other all semester, right?"

"Yeah…? And…?"

"Well you have to talk to me eventually!"

"And I'll stay here dreading when that dreaded eventually will come."

"You cannot be serious! Come on I'm fabulous!"

"Fabulously plastic, dumb, and shallow, if that's what you mean."

"Shallow?!"

"Uh, yeah?"

"How dare-!"

"Alright class!!" The teacher clapped their hands, stopping the impending fight that was about to break out. They started passing out papers to each of the students. "Now choose one or two, or however many you want and ask them to your partner. And yeah it sounds boring and maybe it might be if you're boring. So don't be a boring teenager."

Roman and Virgil got the paper and looked it over. It at least Roman did. He finally picked one and asked it, knowing that trying to wait for the Emo to pay attention would be futile.

"If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?" Roman sighed out.

The answer that came was almost immediate and nearly shook Roman to his core. "Soulmarks." Virgil seemed to have spat the word out. "I'd get rid of all Soulmarks."

Roman was about to ask further about it but he heard a loud clang behind him.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SLEPT WITH SISSI LETANTA?! YOU SHIT!! YOU KNOW THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND'S LITTLE SISTER, YOU BASTARD!!!" The girl behind Roman was in an absolute rage. The boy she was talki- screaming at was pale and seemed like he'd wet set himself out of fear at any moment.

"Whoa…yo Virgil check this ou-" Roman had once again tried to communicate with the Emo boy, but turned to see him filming the whole thing. "What are you doing…?"

"Blackmail."

"What?!"

"You never know when it may come in handy."

"You're the creepiest emo kid I've ever met."

"And how many emos have you met exactly?"

"Three! There was this one girl in my middle school that-"

"Yeah okay you can shut up now."

"Well thanks."

The fight had only been broken up by the bell ringing. And Virgil left without saying a word to Roman.

What a weird, creepy, cute kid… Roman thought. I think I wanna be his friend.

Again, I’m sorry this is later than I wanted it to be, and It’s not as good as I’d like it to be, but I promise I have things planned for this! Big things! Angsty things! Fluff!! I swear it’s going to be better than it is right now, I’m just a little caught up in life at the moment. Hope you liked it! And do feel free to leave a comment if you want me to tag you!! Sweet dreams!!

Taglist

@anxietea-and-insanitea

@ghostboi-bambi

@scrunchiescrunchie

#ts sides #logicality #prinxiety #logan sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #ts Patton #ts virgil #ts logan #ts roman #sanders sides #sanders sides fic #ts sides fic #soulmate au #highschool au #thomas sanders #Soulbound Au

198 notes · View notes

charliefromtheuniverse · 5 years

Text

The Story of “SAVE ME”

Save Me is a 15-episode webtoon that BigHit released in April 2019. The webtoon was announced on a Twitter account called Smeraldo Books and is currently available for free on the Naver webtoon app and website.

The HYYH story of the Bangtan Universe features seven main characters, one that takes the name of each BTS member. Even though we’ve got all seven as main characters, the HYYH storyline does focus a bit more on Seokjin’s character as the protagonist. This webtoon follows him and his actions, and he’s the only character we have real insight into here.

Save Me is set in Year 22, after the backstory established in the HYYH Notes leading up to April 11th of that year. There are more HYYH Notes that take place after Save Me, so it falls somewhere in the middle, during some of the rising action. This follows the trend of BTS’s content often being released in media res, or in the middle, rather than from the beginning.

That being said, reading Save Me on its own prior to dealing with the mammoth that is the HYYH Notes can be beneficial, as it does contain story that introduces some really important events that become a central focus of the overall narrative.

Save Me tells the original story of the HYYH timeline that takes place in Year 22 before Seokjin enters the time loop. We know the HYYH storyline actually starts in Year 9, (see Note from HYYH Book 1 dated in October Year 9). This Note is from when Seokjin is a child—the Year corresponds to Seokjin’s age. The later Notes follow the seven characters sporadically throughout the following years, ending (for now) in Year 22. If we assume that the real-world age differences between the Bangtan members were carried over to their characters, then we can figure out the age of any character for any give Note.

Leading up to Year 22, we have HYYH Note entries from all the characters that establish their individual backstories as well as the group meeting each other and then falling apart. There are definitely important events mentioned in these Notes, so I explain some of the relevant backstory where needed in the summary below.

Though there is backstory before Save Me, this webtoon provides the original course of events; as in, this is what happened to this group of friends after they went their separate ways, before Seokjin interferes. The Save Me logo contains a zero, and the HYYH Notes book contains a one, which indicates that Save Me happens before some of the content of the HYYH Notes. There are some crossovers with what happens in Save Me and what happens in the Notes, since Seokjin re-lives certain days many times.

Below is a summary of each episode, and there’s a brief discussion at the end.

Summary of the Episodes

In the prologue, Taehyung is backing away from a broken bottle with blood on his hands. Namjoon sits in jail with a lollipop which he drops to the floor, and Jungkook is walking along the edge of a rooftop. We see Hoseok fall down the stairs while in a hospital gown and Yoongi in a room that's on fire. Jimin sits alone in a hospital room, hooked up to an IV. Seokjin stands in front of a window with white shades, which he opens and sees himself reflected in the window. These are all images we’ve seen in the “I Need U” music video and Seokjin’s short film titled “Awake.”

Episode 1

Seokjin sits on an airplane from L.A. to Incheon. He later wakes up in the room with the window. He says it's been two years, and though he hasn't been away for all that long, he doesn't feel at home. He leaves the house. In the next scene, he's driving in his truck, and we know it's April 11th from the radio report. He drives past the school, which he hasn't been back to since high school, and he sees Jungkook standing in the crowd of students that are about to cross the street.

There's a flashback to when they were all in school together. A teacher fusses at them for being lazy and gives them all detention. We see the storage classroom, which became their hideout. There's a scene of them enjoying their time together in that classroom. In the HYYH Notes text, we learn how important this room became to them.

In the present, cars are honking at Seokjin to go, and he drives away. At a gas station while he's getting his gas pumped, Seokjin sees Namjoon working on a different car. He looks at him in his mirror but doesn't talk to him.

Next, Seokjin is in his room, reading a red book. The main reason I mention this here is because in the HYYH Notes from later in Year 22, Seokjin picks up a red diary that a girl drops. I don’t think this has any correlation, since this happens in April of the same year.

Later, he seems to have a dream where he's floating in water and all of the other guys are ahead of him with their eyes closed. Seokjin reaches out his hand to them, but then he wakes up. It's May 22nd now, and he wonders how they are and whether he should have walked up to them previously.

Seokjin leaves and goes to the gas station where Namjoon works and asks for him. The other worker tells him Namjoon isn't there and is currently locked up. A news report is seen on the TV in the background that reads "A high school student arrested for killing his father." From the HYYH Notes, we know this is referring to Taehyung rather than Namjoon.

Seokjin goes to visit Namjoon. He offers to help if there’s something he can do, but Namjoon tells him there’s nothing to do. He says the person he beat up berated him for being poor. We get a flashback to Namjoon working at the gas station, where a rude customer yells at him for bumping into the mirror of his expensive car. The money the customer had tried to give him for the gas ends up on the ground, and the customer demands it back. He insults Namjoon and Namjoon responds by slamming the man onto his car. They go to the police station to file a report and the officer comments that the man isn't even really that injured and they should just settle. The rude guy laughs and asks if Namjoon can afford a settlement. Namjoon refuses to settle, so he ends up in jail. Seokjin recalls that it happened on April 11th, the day he saw him at the gas station and didn't speak to him. Namjoon tells him it was bound to happen since he's broke, so Seokjin should just leave him there.

Seokjin asks about the others, but Namjoon says he doesn’t keep in touch. Then, Namjoon drops the real bombshell: Jungkook is dead, and so is Yoongi. Hoseok is in the hospital after a bad accident. He says he doesn't know what happened to Taehyung or Jimin. Seokjin is visibly shaken, but he's asked to leave as visiting time is over.

Walking outside, Seokjin wonders if Namjoon would have not ended up in jail if he had just spoken to him at the gas station that night. He sees a crowd of reporters shouting at someone, asking if they really murdered their father. Seokjin realizes it's Taehyung, walking in a line of criminals with rope tied around his wrists and body. He calls out to him. Taehyung turns around to look at him. Of course, there’s nothing he can do.

In the next scene, Seokjin is alone at the beach as he recalls them all being together and happy at the beach. He says they used to be happy just being together, but now everyone is miserable. He wonders if any of them were happy since they split up. As he sits on the beach clearly upset, a white cat appears and seems to speak. "If you could turn back time, do you believe you can straighten out the errors and mistakes and save everyone?" it says. This text appears graphically different than other speech bubbles—it’s stylized and blue. Seokjin looks at the cat and wonders if he's seeing things, but he says that he'd do anything to fix all the mistakes and make everyone happy.

There's a graphic effect like a mirror shattering, and Seokjin wakes up in his room. He thinks he had a dream, but the date on his phone shows April 11th. As we’ll see going forward, this effect is employed each time Seokjin fails and gets sent back in time.

Episode 2

The first scene opens at the gas station where Seokjin sees Namjoon but doesn't approach him. As he drives off, Seokjin says he should have said hi to Namjoon. Suddenly, there's a loud thud and Seokjin's truck screeches to a stop. A body has fallen on top of the hood, and he recognizes that it's Jungkook. He's clearly dead, and Seokjin starts to panic inside his car. Someone asks him to step out of the car to see if he's okay, and everything starts to go blurry. The shattering effect appears again, and Seokjin wakes up in his room, thinking he had a dream, but he doesn't remember the details.

Seokjin looks at the photo of himself and his friends, dated June 12th from when they were together in high school at the beach (cross-reference: HYYH Note Book 1, Jungkook entry dated June 12 Year 19). He says he misses them and wonders how they are, and he notes that something feels strange.

Seokjin leaves and drives near the school, hearing the same traffic report as we saw in Episode 1. It's April 11th again. Seokjin sees Jungkook walking with other students, and his heart starts racing like it did when Jungkook's body landed on his car in his "dream." He wonders why that's happening, and the cars behind him begin to honk at him to move, so he drives off.

At the gas station, Seokjin leaves without speaking to Namjoon again. As he drives away, he notices he feels like he's forgetting something important. He stops near a convenience store where a cop car passes by and he starts walking down the sidewalk. Suddenly, Jungkook falls to the pavement behind him, and Seokjin turns around to see him dead again. Everything shatters.

Another speech bubble that resembles the one that appeared next to the cat appears now in a different color. It reads: "Am I too late? You could've been the one I was looking for. If you've already sealed the pact, open up your eyes and see straight." Seokjin gets up and shouts "Who are you?" at the voice. The unique speech bubbles appear again and read: "This is the world you have to live in and the fate you must go through. You won't make it out here alone in this entangled destiny. Here's how to remember the loop. Once you open your eyes..." Everything shatters again and Seokjin seems to recall memories of everything up to this point: Namjoon in jail, Taehyung being arrested, and Jungkook dying. He also recalls the first time a voice spoke to him (which appeared in blue text instead of yellow). Seokjin stands in his room, trying to process what's happening. He doesn't have a clue, but notes that the voice was different from last time. Then he realizes that the days seem to be repeating themselves.

Episode 3

The scene opens where Episode 2 left off, and Seokjin realizes he's gone back in time. He gets in his truck and notes that it's April 11th again. There are some scenes showing Taehyung drawing graffiti, Hoseok working in a fast food restaurant, Yoongi playing the piano, Jimin sitting alone in a hospital room, and Jungkook sitting at his desk in school. Seokjin wonders if he can make everything right.

At the gas station, Seokjin greets Namjoon this time (cross-reference: scene from the end of the “Blood, Sweat, and Tears” Japanese music video.) Seokjin tells Namjoon he just got back to Korea, and then Namjoon has to go help another customer. Seokjin watches the rude customer yell at Namjoon and throw money at him. Seokjin steps in and picks up the money, handing it back to the jerk and telling him to leave. He prevents Namjoon from punching the guy and the guy finally leaves (cross-reference: HYYH Notes from ANSWER, Seokjin entry dated 11 April Year 22). Namjoon awkwardly thanks Seokjin and asks him why he's there. Seokjin thinks back to Jungkook jumping off the roof and knows he has to find him before the end of the day. Seokjin asks Namjoon if he keeps in touch with Jungkook, but Namjoon says no. Seokjin rushes, saying he doesn't have time and must find him now. Namjoon asks if he's in trouble, but Seokjin says there's no time to explain now. Namjoon tries again, but Seokjin tells him that one day they'll all be together again and that they should go to the beach when that happens. Seokjin hurries off and Namjoon stands there confused.

Seokjin goes to Jungkook's house to ask where he is. The voice over the doorbell says that he should still be at school and won't be home until after 10pm. He goes to the school and asks the teacher, but he isn't there. Seokjin doesn't know where to go, but he remembers the building, so he tries to go there.

Namjoon is walking around when he spots Jungkook by chance. He calls out to him, but he can't cross the street until the light changes. When he crosses, Jungkook is nowhere to be seen.

Seokjin is in the vicinity of the building he thinks Jungkook is at. He recognizes the convenience store and the police car. He sees a crane and thinks he has the right building, so he rushes up to the roof, but Jungkook isn't there. He wonders if he can really trust his memories.

Episode 4

Jungkook walks alone and brushes past some punks on the street. They call out to him, and he just keeps walking. They go after him and beat him up (cross-reference: seen in “I Need U” and HYYH Note from HER, Jungkook entry dated 11 April Year 22).

Seokjin recalls his memory and realizes it isn't the right building. On another building, Jungkook climbs up on the ledge (cross-reference: “Euphoria” music video, HYYH Notes from ANSWER and HER, Jungkook entries dated 11 April Year 22). Someone calls out to him before he can jump.

Namjoon is yelling at him from the street below, telling him not to move. Jungkook stumbles and starts to fall, but Seokjin catches him. Seokjin tells him he's been looking for him all day and asks him what he was doing out here alone. That triggers a memory for Jungkook where his mother fusses at him, asking him where he had been all day and telling him not to worry his father (cross-reference: seen in HYYH Note from HER, Jungkook entry dated 11 April Year 22, where we learn a bit of Jungkook’s family background).

Seokjin asks again why Jungkook was up there, and Jungkook tells him no reason. Namjoon comes running up to the roof to where they stand. At that moment, Jungkook’s cell phone rings and we can see that it's Yoongi. The scene cuts to Yoongi's phone, which shows several unanswered calls to Jungkook. He's flicking a lighter on and off as he sits in a motel room (cross-reference: “I Need U” music video). In his mind, he sees a burning piano and himself as a young boy.

Episode 5

We pick back up with Seokjin asking Jungkook why he was on the roof. Jungkook brushes it off. Namjoon asks what happened to his face, and he lies and says he bumped into a wall. Namjoon knows it's a lie, but Seokjin gives him a look that say not to push it. Seokjin asks Jungkook if his parents wouldn't be worried that he's out late, but he doesn't respond. His phone rings, and it's Yoongi.

In the next scene, Jungkook, Seokjin, and Namjoon rush into the emergency room, so it seems that someone call Jungkook's number from Yoongi's phone since it was the last number dialed. They watch as doctors work on Yoongi, who has burn marks and an oxygen mask. Yoongi starts to code and the doctors try to shock him back to life, but he flatlines. As they watch him die, everything shatters again and Seokjin wakes up in his room with tears in his eyes. He leaves his home again.

We're back at the scene where Jungkook is about to get beaten up by the punks on the street, but before he can, Seokjin grabs him by the hood and pulls him into an alley. Seokjin tells Jungkook and Namjoon to stay there, and they're both confused as to what's happening, and Jungkook is confused as to where Seokjin came from. Seokjin runs off and Jungkook asks Namjoon why he's there, and Namjoon says he was dragged there too. Namjoon asks if Jungkook keeps in contact with Yoongi. Suddenly, Namjoon gets a call from someone, saying something about police.

Seokjin ends up at a motel, asking if Yoongi is there. The woman working the front won't give out guest information, but when Seokjin tells her he might set fire to the building, she suddenly pays attention.

Namjoon and Jungkook go to the police station, where Namjoon grumbles that Seokjin left them and they don't know where he is. Namjoon turns to Taehyung, who they had gone to the police station to pick up, and asks him if he has kept in touch with Yoongi since Seokjin was looking for him. Taehyung says he's seen Yoongi in his dreams. A group of policemen rush by, saying a suspected arsonist is at large.

Episode 6

Seokjin and the woman from the motel are watching security footage, trying to find Yoongi. Seokjin thinks they found him on the tape, but the guy turns around and it's not him. He looks out the window across the street and sees fire coming from a different motel. Everything shatters again.

Seokjin re-lives April 11th again, this time stopping the first time he sees Jungkook at the crosswalk at the school. He immediately asks if he keeps in contact with Yoongi. Jungkook is surprised but Seokjin is in a hurry so he presses him. Jungkook recalls the last time he heard from Yoongi, where Yoongi seems to be lying down depressed. In that memory, he tells Jungkook to get lost. Jungkook doesn't tell Seokjin any of this. Jungkook admits that he's seen Yoongi.

Seokjin puts Jungkook in the car with himself and Namjoon, and Taehyung is also there. They drive to the part of town where Jungkook saw him last, and Taehyung interjects that this isn't where he saw Yoongi. Namjoon points out that Taehyung only saw him in a dream. As Seokjin wonders why Yoongi's location keeps changing each time when Namjoon and Jungkook's location doesn't, a truck skids on the road in front of them and Seokjin can't stop in time. He hits it head on, and it appears that the others are either severely injured or dead. Seokjin seems to be barely conscious as he thinks that it's his fault. He says that the future keeps changing because he keeps making changes in the past. Everything shatters again.

Seokjin is in his room again, this time drawing a map and trying to strategize how to save everyone. He plans it out exactly, thinking that if he does it just right, he can save everyone.

In the next scene, Seokjin has saved Jungkook and had him call Yoongi. Yoongi is at a restaurant drinking. He answers, and Seokjin asks him where he is. Yoongi hangs up and ignores other calls. Yoongi seems to recall his father yelling at him about music and the piano, saying that he's like his mom and that if he wants to kill himself the same way she did, then go ahead. Yoongi ends up back at the motel with his lighter. He lights a piece of composition paper on fire and drops it onto some spilled alcohol, causing a fire to start.

Episode 7

There's a flashback to Yoongi playing the piano in high school in the storage classroom. Jungkook comes in and puts a couple of desks together so he can lie down and listen (cross-reference: HYYH Note from HER, Jungkook entry dated 25 June Year 20). A teacher comes in and finds them, and he slaps Jungkook, knocking him down. Yoongi steps in between the teacher and Jungkook. After this, there's a notice of expulsion for Yoongi posted. It's marked June 25th.

Seokjin sees smoke coming out of a motel that he's driving by, so he stops there and runs to Yoongi's room. He pounds on the door and when no one answers, he gets the fire axe and busts the door open. He carries Yoongi out who seems to faintly recognize that it's Seokjin.

At the hospital, Seokjin waits for Yoongi to wake up, hoping that everything is fixed now. When he wakes up, Yoongi blames Seokjin for not letting him die. He asks him why he saved him. Seokjin realizes that he thought he had saved him, but it wasn't enough.

A month later on May 11th, Taehyung is drawing graffiti when the police spot him and he begins to run. He ends up at Namjoon's container house and goes inside. Namjoon asks him what he did this time, and they hear the police looking for him outside. Taehyung asks if he can stay the night.

Episode 8

Taehyung has a dream that he's submerged in water, much like Seokjin had in the beginning. He sees Jimin and tries to reach for him, but Jimin is being pulled down by an unknown hand. Taehyung wakes up in Namjoon's container and asks him where he thinks Jimin is.

In the next scene, Jimin is sitting alone in the hospital. A little kid asks him why he's there and then suddenly collapses. Jimin calls for help, but Hoseok, who was in the next bed, says that it's okay. He says the boy fell asleep like he does because he’s narcoleptic. Hoseok is in the hospital because he fell outside by himself and smacked his head, from the supposed narcolepsy he’s had since he was young (cross-reference: HYYH Note from Persona, Hoseok entry dated 10 May Year 22).

Hoseok recalls that they saw each other last two years ago, when Jimin had a seizure at the bus stop. Jimin says he doesn't know how long he's been here because his clock stopped ticking (cross-references with “Run” music video and HYYH Notes from ANSWER and the HYYH Book, Hoseok entry dated 12 May Year 22 and Jimin entry dated 11 May Year 22).

In the next scene, Jimin overflows a sink with water and puts his head in. It's not clear what he's doing. He seems to recall the Flower Arboretum sign, blood spatter on the floor, and himself as a child running away. He gets scared and struggles, and we see the scene of him submerged in water being pulled down by an unknown person. Jimin snaps out of it and takes his head out of the sink.

Taehyung and Namjoon walk down the train tracks and Taehyung tells him that he's been having a weird dream. He says he sees Yoongi trapped inside a fire and Jimin drowning in water. Namjoon tells him it's nonsense and asks if he wants to go see Hoseok. He perks up at that and runs ahead. As he does do, Namjoon sees bruises on the back of Taehyung's neck.

Namjoon and Taehyung go to Two Star Burger where Hoseok works, but they tell them he's in the hospital. They go to the hospital to look for him.

While walking down the hall, Hoseok overhears some of the medical staff talking about Jimin, overhearing that Jimin's parents forced him to be hospitalized.

The medical staff walk down the stairs, and further down, we see Seokjin waiting.

Episode 9

Seokjin thinks back to when Yoongi asked him why didn’t he just let him die. He apologized to him and asked him if he could turn back time, would he go back to when they met and change anything. Yoongi just tells him to leave. Seokjin leaves while contemplating if he can really save Yoongi, since he saved him against his will. He thinks that there may be no point, but even so, he can’t give up.

Seokjin goes to find Yoongi in the hospital, but they tell him Yoongi was discharged last month.

In the next scene, Yoongi is with Namjoon, Taehyung, and Jungkook at the hospital. Hoseok is in Jimin’s room and receives a phone call. He asks Jimin if he wants to see the others, but Jimin refuses. Hoseok goes to see the others alone, and Taehyung asks if he keeps in touch with Jimin because he’s been thinking about him. Hoseok doesn’t answer.

Namjoon runs into Seokjin in the hallway and asks if he’s there to see Hoseok—Seokjin hadn’t known Hoseok was there.

The next day, Hoseok thinks he sees a woman who looks like his mom. He starts to slip down the stairs. The scene cuts to Seokjin running into Jimin at the hospital. Medical staff rush through the area with an injured patient, and Seokjin sees Hoseok lying on the gurney with a very injured ankle. Everything begins to shatter again.

Episode 10

Seokjin wakes up again on April 11th. He is still determined to fix everything. He tapes the photo they took at the beach on June 12 to his rearview mirror and puts sticky notes of the guys and their locations on the dash of his truck. He checks off Namjoon and Jungkook, leading us to believe he saved them again.

On May 10th, he goes to the bridge Hoseok is going to fall on. He catches him, puts him in the truck, and drives off. Hoseok wakes up, surprised to see him. He takes his medication and there’s not much else he can do. Seokjin asks if he knows what’s causing the narcolepsy, and Hoseok doesn’t answer. Hoseok has to go to work, but before he gets out of the truck, he notices the sticky notes on Seokjin’s dash. He asks what it is, but Seokjin won’t tell him. At work, Hoseok wonders what’s going on.

Later, Hoseok meets up with Namjoon and tells him how Seokjin showed up at the right time. It happened to Namjoon too, and he feels like something is off. Hoseok gets on a scooter and Namjoon warns him that they’re dangerous (cross-reference: HYYH Note from Book 1, Namjoon entry dated 17 December Year 21, where Namjoon previously slid on a scooter and another young boy in the village died from a scooter accident).

As if it were foreshadowing, Hoseok nearly gets into a wreck on the scooter when he cuts across traffic to try and catch up to Seokjin’s truck. He had sent him a text, but Seokjin hadn’t responded yet. This leads into the beginning of Episode 11.

Episode 11

Hoseok barely avoids being hit by a car. As Seokjin drives down the road, he sees Yoongi walking. Yoongi goes to a motel with his lighter, and we see him light some music on fire.

Hoseok eats at a convenience store, wondering why Seokjin hasn’t answered him. He sees Seokjin drive by, so he rushes out of the store to follow him. He sees Seokjin carrying Yoongi out of a burning motel. They rush Yoongi to the hospital and as the doctors tend to him, Hoseok recalls the sticky notes. Hoseok asks Seokjin if he knew it was going to happen. He continues to question him, but Seokjin tells him he can’t explain right now. Hoseok goes to the lobby to wait.

Hoseok thinks he sees Jimin in the hospital, but it turns out not to be him. He nearly slips on the stairs, and Jimin shows up behind him to stop him from falling. They sit down to talk and Hoseok realizes that Jimin has been there ever since he had a seizure at the bus stop. Hoseok recalls being abandoned by his mom as a child and says he knows what it feels like to feel stuck in time. Hoseok asks Jimin if he wants to get out of the hospital, and Jimin struggles to answer.

Episode 12

Namjoon gets a call at night from Hoseok, who yells into the phone that something is definitely going on. Taehyung is there with Namjoon.

Seokjin sits at Yoongi’s bedside and says he doesn’t remember how many times he’s been through this. But, he still says he won’t stop trying. Seokjin runs up the stairs to find Jimin but is met with Namjoon, Hoseok, and Taehyung all coming down the stairs with Jimin. They’re there to break Jimin out, but Seokjin worries that this time loop will fail and he doesn’t know what would happen if they break Jimin out. He’s worried about a bigger accident. Seokjin blocks their path. Taehyung argues with him, and Seokjin thinks about how he hasn’t seen Jimin’s final moments and doesn’t even know why he’s in the hospital. Hoseok tells Seokjin how Jimin is there because his parents locked him up for two years. Seokjin relents and tells Jimin it’s his decision.

Jimin flashes back to his mother leaving him in the hospital because she can’t handle him. Jimin seems to envision a black substance around his feet, which he attempts to scratch off in a tub full of water, appearing to even damage his skin with the force of his scratches. Next, Jimin is submerged in water again, and he recalls the Flower Arboretum and the blood spatter. He sees the black substance dripping off his body and then flashes back to the present, where he sees it around his feet again. He tells them he wants to get out.

They make a run for it, but they run into Jimin’s mother. She makes him go back to his room and asks if those were the kids from high school. They fight about Jimin’s hospital stay and Jimin yells that locking him up isn’t right and that she’s just embarrassed of him. His mother slaps him and blames him for his seizures. She complains that he puts her and his father through hell. Jimin cries, alone in his room, noting that in the two years he’s been there, today was the first day he had visitors.

On May 12th, Seokjin sits at the hospital when he hears medical staff yelling for Jimin. He’s locked himself in the bathroom, and they pry open the door. Seokjin bursts in to find Jimin in a tub full of water, likely attempting to drown. He goes to pull him out.

Episode 13

Seokjin shakes Jimin who is still alive and wonders how much pain he has to go through and if he can save them. Jimin asks Seokjin to get him out, and Seokjin runs with him and puts him in the truck. While they drive, Jimin sees the Flower Arboretum sign and freaks out, jumping out of the car and running into a construction zone. Seokjin wakes up again on April 11th. The white cat is in Seokjin’s room.

Seokjin doubts that he’s able to save everyone, even though he thought he could. He sits in his room all day, upset at his inability to save the others. Since he does nothing, April 11th starts over again.

This time, Taehyung shows up at Seokjin’s door. Seokjin is confused, and Taehyung says he saw Seokjin in his dream but he’s surprised to actually find him at home. That gives Seokjin the strength to carry on. Seokjin acknowledges that if he does nothing, the cycle won’t end.

After a cut, Seokjin shows up at Namjoon’s container with Jimin, and the other guys are all there too. Namjoon offers to let Jimin stay there until he’s ready to go back home. It seems that Seokjin succeeded, and he says they should go to the beach.

Episode 14

All of the guys play around with sparklers, happy while spending time together. On May 20th, Taehyung comes out of the police department and walks home, not wanting to go in. Taehyung walks in to his dad in a rage, yelling at him and slapping his sister. He flashes back to the past where he was a child and his sister (or possibly mother) tells him to hide in his room when his father is beating her. Not able to watch or take the abuse any longer, Taehyung takes an alcohol bottle and runs at his father. In the next scene, Taehyung cries as he looks at the blood on his hands and clothes (cross-reference: “Prologue” video).

Elsewhere, Namjoon and Seokjin talk about Jimin looking happier now. Seokjin asks about Taehyung, and Namjoon says he missed his call and tried to call back, Taehyung didn’t answer. Namjoon recalls the bruises on Taehyung and how he tends to hide his personal life. The episode ends with Hoseok pulling up to where Namjoon and Seokjin are, saying that something happened with Taehyung.

Episode 15

The final episode opens with Seokjin rushing to the police station where there’s a crowd of media around Taehyung, just like in the beginning. They’re asking him why he murdered his father and why he didn’t speak up about the abuse sooner. Seokjin pushes through the crowd and calls out to Taehyung, and everything shatters again.

Seokjin wakes up in his room again, realizing that he got careless and wasn’t able to save Taehyung. He’s determined not to fail this time.

Fast forward to May 20th, and Taehyung is coming out of the police station. He meets Seokjin outside. In the truck, Seokjin asks what’s happening at home and Taehyung won’t answer. Seokjin doesn’t force him to talk and instead tells him to talk when he’s ready. Taehyung says there’s something he wants to talk about and tells Seokjin he’s been having a strange dream where Yoongi is trapped in a fire, Jungkook falls from a building, Hoseok has an accident, and Namjoon is in prison. He says he has the dream every night and Seokjin wonders how he knows these things. Taehyung says he’s in the dream, but he can’t remember what happens to himself. Seokjin’s alarmed.

Seokjin drops Taehyung off at his house, and they can hear his dad yelling from outside. Taehyung runs off and Seokjin follows. Taehyung hits his father with the alcohol bottle and is about to stab him with the broken bottle when Seokjin bursts in. He grabs Taehyung and tries to stop him, but Taehyung pushes him off. Seokjin tries again, and Taehyung accidentally stabs Seokjin with the bottle instead. Taehyung begins to cry, and as he’s dying Seokjin wonders if he’s succeeded this time or if he’ll really die. Everything shatters again.

Seokjin wakes up, and it’s April 11th. He recalls the words spoken to him: “You won’t make it out here alone… in this entangled destiny.” He realizes he can’t do it on his own, no matter how many times he tries. The webtoon ends with him looking at the photo they took on June 12th at the beach and the words “Once again, just like before, together with you all.”

Discussion

Even though Save Me was released after some of the HYYH Notes, since it has that zero in the logo, it best fits as the first string of events that take place in Year 22. Basically every note we have prior to April 11th in Year 22 is static—that story doesn’t change. In the webtoon and the notes, we get multiple repeat days as Seokjin tries to save them all.

Time loops in narratives often operate on the idea that the character or characters involved will gain some sort of knowledge that will eventually allow them to get out of the loop. We definitely see that with Seokjin here, and Taehyung does have dreams that are actually true memories from previous iterations of the timeline. He has even more of those dreams in the HYYH Notes, and some of the notes lead me to believe that Taehyung eventually starts to figure it out. It’s possible that this story won’t be fully resolved until they all work together to fix it.

The Butterfly Effect also seems to be at play here because sometimes when Seokjin alters the past, it changes the future events, sometimes leading to character deaths. For example, when he gets several of them in the car to save them, but he ends up wrecking and killing them anyway. He quickly learns he can’t know what will happen from his change in actions—he could end up saving everyone or end up starting over on April 11th again.

We also know that Seokjin can’t die. He dies at the end when Taehyung stabs him, but that just takes him back to April 11th, so he has to survive too. Back before we had so much information on this story, some theorized that Seokjin might need to die in order to save the others, but we know that won’t work either. His death won’t bring about a resolution.

We still don’t know much about the white cat or how the time loop really works. Time travel is logically impossible, but it’s often used in science fiction or fantasy to create interesting “what if” situations—since it’s widely used in various ways, it’s possible that the BigHit creative team has made up their own rules surrounding this time loop and the white cat for example. We can’t really know until we get the full story. Some previously thought the white cat was a kitsune/gumiho, but it’s been confirmed to be a cat, based on the release of the HYYH Art Toys on Bighit’s merch app Weply.

I do not think we're dealing with parallel universes or anything related to the many worlds theory. I've not seen anything to indicate that this is anything other than a time loop used as a narrative device.

I think it’s also interesting that we see a little bit of something called the Novikov self-consistency principle. This principle basically states that the past cannot be altered, so even if someone goes back in time, they can’t change the outcome of events. Sometimes this principal is applied in fiction—stories that use this principle often have characters who try to go back in time to change something but either fail or end up causing the event to happen that they’re trying to prevent. An example of this is the fatal car crash that occurs when Seokjin tries to gather up some of his friends—he tries to prevent their deaths only to cause them. Even though we may see this principle sometimes, I don’t think it’s end-game. I do believe we’ll eventually get a resolution that doesn’t involve the characters ending up dead or miserable.

September 3, 2019

4 notes · View notes

shinyobjectreviews · 3 years

Text

An In-Depth Analysis of my Observations Playing CROSSBOW: Bloodnight

CROSSBOW: Bloodnight looks like shovelware, and I don’t blame anyone for thinking that. There’s a lot missing from the game. There’s a typo in the launch announcement. However, the lack of standard triple A bloat means it’s rather easy to dissect the game. So I’m going to break apart some of what happened to me as I was playing and started to question the quality of the game only to determine it was my own skill lessening my experience.

Devil Daggers

Credit where it’s due, a lot of stuff in the game is a blatant ripoff of Devil Daggers. It will occasionally come up. If I say DD know I’m referring to Devil Daggers. The developers have said publicly the game is intended for fans of DD, so they’re not trying to hide it, and though the games are extremely similar, it’s still worth analyzing CB:Bn to see what they decided to keep, lose, or change. Originality is nice to have, but it’s not everything.

The Crossbow

Let’s start at the beginning. The crossbow is amazing. When sustaining fire the triple-chambered crossbow fires each chamber individually. When firing like a shotgun, they all fire at once. When firing the rocket, the center chamber pulls back further, and the prongs bend back considerably to emphasize the weight of the projectile. The appearance starts to resemble a modern-day compound crossbow, as though it is focusing the strength from other prongs into one. Your character also slows down: thematically this shows again the strain of this massive projectile, but practically it also helps you line up your shot better, since the rocket has more pinpoint accuracy and higher damage than the standard projectile and can therefore be used to fire at long distances. Something taken from DD is that the projectiles have a rather significant spread and a slow velocity, meaning that you can deal more consistent damage faster by being closer to your target, a dangerous but rewarding and skillful strategy. The crossbow also changes color as it upgrades, which you won’t miss due to the camera slow and bright glow, but it’s nice to see it on the crossbow itself as you’re playing. It’s an easy signifier, but it also just looks nice and feels cool.

The Introduction

The first half minute of the game is slow. A single zombie (The Restless One) spawns, then a couple more. You then get the big tentacle monsters (The Tainted Ones) that spawn the bats (The Hungry Ones). Of the few comments I’ve seen in the game, one was a complaint about this intro being slow and uninteresting after the first few runs. After all, while it does a great job at slowly introducing elements to new players, you learn pretty quick, but it can’t just be removed from the game because it would interfere with the time-attack scoring. I also disliked this part after my first few runs. However, I have come to love this part of the game. The end of a run can often feel dissatisfying, and most players will immediately want to try again. While most just want to rush to where they were at, the game forces you to wait, calm down, and get reacclimated. You also get to blow off some steam by obliterating the weak early enemies at almost no risk. I’ve also used this time to practice: learning exactly how long after the spawn animation takes until a demon is vulnerable, how close to the eye I have to shoot, rehearsing projectile timing, anything that I feel could use work.

The Spawning

This was one of the first issues I had with the game. I often died to demons spawning in behind me, or werewolves (The Feral Ones) using their long range dash to hit me from the other side of the map when I hadn’t even seen them appear. Even with the big red circles that appear before they spawn, However, there were two things I learned in short order. The first is that each enemy has its own unique spawn sound, each one roughly as loud as its importance (I wouldn’t even think the zombies had any if I didn’t hear it isolated during the introduction). The howl of the werewolves is especially notable, which is good because their dash has incredible range. The second thing I came to realize is that the game was pushing me to look where I was going. Shooters are all about circle strafing and firing while walking backwards, but not CROSSBOW: Bloodnight. In this game, you have to fire forward. Where you’re looking. It is safer to run towards one of the stationary Tainted Ones to try and kill them while letting the zombies and bats chase you from behind. The Feral Ones will dash at you, but you can pay attention to the noises they make to try and dodge them, or just turn and look if you dare. Once again, the game offers you a choice: run away from enemies while shooting behind you and risk bumping into guys in front of you, or charge at foes head on (remember the primary fire is better at close ranges) and try and thin out the herd later.

The Dash

If you check out the reviews on Steam, the primary difference between CB:Bn and DD is that the former has a dash. Once again, It didn’t really think of this while playing, and didn’t really start using it until after my first dozen runs. I actually started using it almost jokingly in the introduction as a way to get from the first spawning zombie to the second. I started learning the exact distance of the dash and it’s timing. Eventually, I started using it in game. It has the same issue as above, where dashing into a crowd of enemies is just as common as dashing away from them, but if timed well and planned well it can be a literal lifesaver. If you can properly perform it, you can also dash into the Tainted One and fire off a one-shot kill into the eye with the shotgun.

The Special

The game has an ability it grants you once every 60 seconds roughly where , if you press Q, it will slow down time a bit and show you a giant line the width of a house directly in front of you. Your crossbow is also aimed up and glows with radiant light. If you pull the trigger, every enemy in the highlighted area will be skewered with a holy lance and get one-shot. Like the dash, I was unsure of how best to implement it, but I have three theories. The first use is as a emergency clear. If you’re panicked and want to just get rid of some enemies, you can hit this to get a little space. It’s a nice way to bring the tension down if you’re starting to not enjoy it. The second option is as a time-saver. If you have multiple enemies you want dead, especially Tainted Ones whose weak points you can’t reach, you can line them up to hit at least two and maybe more. This is a use of skill and lets you try and optimize your runs. Lastly you can just show off with it. Use it for some dumb reason because you feel like it. Whatever the reason, the fact that it’s on a cooldown encourages you to use it aggressively rather than save it for a powerful attack, since the sooner you use it the sooner you can start charging up the next one.

The Enemies

I’m solidly impressed at the enemy variety. The Restless ones are bolt fodder, keeping you aware of your surroundings, but never dealing enough to kill you without you knowing it. The Tainted Ones are stationary to give you fixed goals, and they spawn bats to harass you but only until you give them a little attention. The werewolves are the first big threat: they do not exist to be killed, they exist to kill you. You must know where all of them are to stay safe. The Troubled Ones shoot shockwaves, and are the first true long-range foes. They force you to jump at the right time, forcing you to stay aware of your jumping, and punishing those relying too hard on bunny-hopping. Those are all of the enemies I’ve encountered for now, but they all come together in such exciting ways. Even the Tainted Ones themselves have neat interactions. Nearly all of them spawn at the edge of the map, making it harder to kill them form the other side and forcing you to get up close, but I also encountered one in the center of the map, whose positioning forced me into an awkward spot in order to get to its weak point.

The Map

I’ll be honest, I don’t have much to say about the map. It is donut shaped: big circle with a spot in the center no-one can get through. I much prefer it to DD because it has some landmarks around it that help orient you, allowing you to more easily remember where enemies spawn and where you are in the moment. The hole in the center also give you just enough of a safe space that your circle strafing doesn’t get weird with demons just sitting in the center getting constantly kited. I also expect a boss to spawn there at some point, making for a nice focal point.

The Setting

On a thematic level, the map is heavy with gothic arches and pointy spires. While I assumed this was an anachronistic stylistic choice, I did my research, and it turns out gothic architecture did in fact originate in the early 12th century, where the game is set. The opening text tells us that the game takes place close to 1193 AD, a time when the church outlawed the use of Crossbows against Christians. The game recontextualizes this as declaring the Crossbow as “ungodly” and “demonic,” which is a clever way of getting an excuse to use Crossbows against Demons. The crossbow in question, is mildly inaccurate not in terms of time but location. A triple-chambered repeating-crossbow seems far-fetched, but China had been using repeating crossbows (Cho ku nu) and triple-bed mounted naval crossbows for hundreds of years by this point in time. Firing multiple bolts simultaneously at the cost of reduced range and accuracy was actually a real tactic used at the time as well. The idea of either being hand-held requires some suspension of disbelief, as does the ammo storage, but that’s well deserved for an arena shooter like this.

The Story

There isn’t much of a story here, but it’s there if you look. As mentioned, the game declares the Crossbow ungodly, and implies that it is used in some form of demonic ritual. However, the glowing light implies otherwise. Each enemy is named after some form of torment: hungry, restless, troubled, tainted, etc., and with exception of the Restless Ones, each one releases a soul when slain that the player can “collect.” This implies that these demons may be corrupted forms of humans that are being slain to release their tormented souls from some form of punishment and collecting them for some unknown reason. The fact that the zombies and the bats don’t leave souls follows this logic, since the zombies seem more like animated lifeless corpses than living creatures, and the bats are, well, bats. They also spawn from the Tainted Ones, so they are kind of just extensions of that. The game also has achievements that I have yet to understand, and seem to imply I am either evil or not evil based on a statistic I have not found. It intrigues me, but I will have to keep playing I guess to find out what it means.

Minor things

I’m ashamed to admit I didn’t have anywhere else to put these so here’s some other stuff I just want to throw in there.

The first upgrade you get is from killing a werewolf, after which another werewolf immediately spawns, letting you directly compare how long it took to kill the last one and how long it took to kill this one.

You can actually see the werewolves jumping in from outside the map before they spawn.

When you’re hit, the screen goes bloody like any other game, but there’s already blood everywhere, so the game give you a scary tone that plays until you heal back up.

Conclusion

And that’s all I can really say about the game. I’m not here to convince you to buy CROSSBOW: Bloodnight, I’m not here to convince you it’s good, I’m not even trying to convince you to play it. I just wanted to talk about this. I’m not even sure if it’s my favorite game of the year, if only because Hades is about the toughest competition it could have faces. So if it’s not my favorite, not the best, and arguably not worth your time, then what is CROSSBOW: Bloodnight?

My best answer? It’s mine. This is a game I want to exist. This is a game practically built for me. I bought it, played it, I loved it, and I feel like I’m the only one who has, and that makes me feel special. So maybe don’t look too much into this review. Perhaps I’m overblowing it because I feel personally attached to this game in a way I never have before. But hey, if you’ve gotten all the way to the end, maybe you care about what I have to say. So here’s the summary.

CROSSBOW: Bloodnight is a really cool video game, and I really like it.

2 notes · View notes

sariahsue · 5 years

Text

The Open Line, Chapter Six - Secrets

Ladybug knows that if it weren’t for Adrien, she would have fallen for Cat Noir, hard and fast. And when Oblivio takes her memory, she does just that. Able to keep her memory after the Oblivio incident but still unaware of Cat Noir’s real identity, Ladybug must deal with her growing feelings for her partner, who is desperately trying to win her over. (Rated PG.)

Read Chapter One Here Read Chapter Five Here

***

Marinette fingered the corner of the poster Alya had given her to "encourage her new crush." Alya was completely wrong, of course. All through the school day Marinette had been blushing every time someone mentioned Cat Noir, true, but it was from the embarrassment of last night's "bell incident" and nothing more. It definitely had nothing to do with the two-day break from him she'd had to take to rid herself of the perplexing emotions that Oblivio had caused. Definitely not.

"So are you putting it up or not?" Tikki asked. "You're going to be late to patrol if you keep standing there."

"It's okay for me to have his picture up, right?" Marinette asked. "I can support my partner. I don't have a crush on him." She reached for the tape and started sticking it to the corners. "I'm supporting my friend." Marinette pushed the corners against the wall, making sure they were stuck fast.

Tikki waited until the poster was secure and then said, "It's not healthy to deny your feelings like that."

"I'm not!" Marinette flailed her arms around in an attempt to be taken seriously. "We're just friends."

"Okay. If you're sure."

Marinette transformed before Tikki could say anything else crazy, and Ladybug was soaring to Parc de Bercy before she knew it. Tonight, they would be patrolling the 12th Arrondissement.

Cat Noir was much the same as he had been the night before, quiet and distant, though this time, she caught him staring at her intently when he thought she wasn't looking. She was rattled to realize that she liked the attention.

The longer the night wore on, the more she suspected that there was more going on than just silence. Something was definitely wrong.

The ending of patrol was a drawn-out process. Back at the park, they shuffled their feet and said goodnight several times before Ladybug simply sat down on a bench and patted the space next to her. It was late, and they both should have been going to bed, but it was a nice night, and even though she definitely DID NOT have feelings for her partner, he was good company, and she enjoyed spending time with him. Besides, he still looked like he could do with some more attention. She might be able to help him feel better. A few extra minutes couldn't hurt, right?

"So, you ready to talk about it?"

"What?"

"Whatever is wrong?"

"Nothing," he said. He had left a small gap between them when he'd sat down. The air between them felt colder than the air everywhere else, and she didn't like. She scooted a little closer, careful not to touch him, since she wasn't sure how he would react.

Their bench overlooked a large lake, which reflected moonlight. A light breeze made ripples on the surface dance. After the gates were locked was her favorite time to visit the city parks, when they became one of the few places she could be truly alone with her partner. It was peaceful.

"Sometimes, I don't like being civilian me," she whispered. Maybe, if she started sharing secrets, he'd do the same. He needed to talk to someone. "Sure, the stakes are higher, but I can just erase all my mistakes at the end. Plus, I get this partner to help me out." She bumped his shoulder lightly. "He's kind of great."

"I like to watch anime."

"Come on, I told you a secret. That's not a secret."

"It's a personal detail that you didn't know before. It counts."

"Really? I didn't hear you quoting Steins;gate two weeks ago?" He hadn't explained the reference to her, and she'd had to use her yoyo to Google how a microwave started World War Three. "I know what crazy shows you watch."

"Fine. I-"

For a few seconds, she thought he was going to say it.

"I'd wanted to learn embroidery when I was little. I thought it looked cool, and thought maybe it was fancy enough that my father would let me try it, so I asked for lessons. I was told it wasn't practical, so the answer was no. I tried to teach myself from the internet anyway. Turns out I'm terrible at it, so I quit. I never told anyone else that. Does it count?"

"I'll allow it." They had a common interest? Really?! She tried to squelch the excitement by reminding herself that he had told her a secret, but not what was wrong. She'd have to try a more direct approach. "So this thing that's bothering you, it's a person, isn't it?"

"I- My..." He turned away quickly. She hoped he wasn't going to say her. Three days ago, she'd run out on him, then abandoned him during patrols without warning, and couldn't get a word out of him since. It would make sense that she was the cause, and she hated to admit it.

"My... father," he finally said, and Ladybug sighed with relief.

"What about him?"

"He's very... distant. We don't understand each other very well."

He shifted, bringing his arm up, and for a moment, she thought he was going to put it around her, or maybe run his fingers through her hair, but he only scratched the back of his neck and let his hand fall again. Ladybug told herself that she wasn't disappointed. She hadn't wanted him to hold her. She only wanted to be near him because she cared about him. That was an objective fact. And sharing personal details was making her feel closer to him. That was all. It didn't mean anything else.

"Have you talked to him about it?" she asked. Focus on the task at hand, Marinette. He needs your attention right now.

"Tried to."

"What about other people?"

Cat Noir shrugged.

"No one? You can't expect things to change if you don't ask someone for help."

"You don't get it," he said. "And it's not like I can tell you more about it. Identities."

"Yeah," she said. "I know." There were some secrets they would have to keep, though she'd never hated it more than she did right then.

***

Read chapter seven right here!

Author's note: If I ever do one of these prompt month things again, I'll take a leaf out of @thenovelartist's book and combine multiple days into larger chapters. Pacing it myself, I probably would have written days one through four as one and days six through eight as another. Day five is the only one that makes sense to me as its own thing. Oh, well.

#ml #miraculous #miraculous ladybug #ladynoir #ladynoir july #fanfiction

127 notes · View notes

teddystrap · 5 years

Audio

Drama CD: [黒吉原メランコリア] The First Night: Agumo Hibari - Part 1

Heyyy everyone I’m back~~~ with a series that is not like all the rest... except for the recycled seiyuu (#Rejet #eye-roll) and the setting (Yoshiwara; well at least this time you are not the courtesan).

The story revolves around a *rumour* that mermaid tears contain powers of eternal youth/life. And to test this out, a game has begun in the black quarters aka. ‘Kuro’ part of Yoshiwara. The rules for the players are as follows:

You must enthrall her.

You must not hurt her.

You must not let her escape.

The one who successfully achieves the three criteria above is the winner, and he can make the mermaid (i.e. YOU/the listener) his wife/mistress and wield the power of her tears. There are six players in total, including the game creator Agumo Hibari (cv. Toriumi Kousuke).

So, let the game begin.

NB. Each story in this series has two discs, so to keep this from becoming too long I will be doing a two-part synopsis and giving my thoughts at the end.

[Disc 1]

You can't sleep and are arranging flowers in your room, when Hibari comes over. He helps you and starts reminiscing about your first days here in Yoshiwara:

...It was the end of plum blossom season, the birds are chirping and the weather is nice. Your pimp (/guardian who raised you) brings you over to Kuro Yoshiwara in a horse-drawn carriage, and Hibari comes out to greet you. You glare at him in anger, and he's all like: 'Instead of hating me, why don't you hate your useless debt-ridden parents for selling you off?' #he’sgotapoint #burnnn

He promises your life will change now that you have come to Kirarou, the top house of Kuro Yoshiwara. Taking you up to the rooftop, he shows you the panoramic view, pointing out the burgundy gate of Yoshiwara - he warns that if you try to escape, you will face harsh punishment and possibly death.

He introduces himself as an old-timer/factotum and #1 oiran: Agumo Hibari. And oh btw he was the one who spent a fortune to get you into this place. ...But there's no time to be mad at him. You have to hurry up and get ready to serve the clients.

...Ofc he's not really going to make you perform hooker duties. He takes you into the lounge and blindfolds you, claiming that you are not allowed to see the customers' faces. But! Tonight *it just so happens* that there are no clients. So he's gonna evaluate you to see if you are a good fit for Kirarou.

Before he even starts, you hit him, and he bear-hugs you to restrain your movements. He starts assessing your appearance, mumbling to himself that he can't believe that you are actually a mermaid with the blood of the mythical Happkyaku-bikuni and who's gonna win this game---

He gives you your courtesan name: Nanami, which means 'the seven seas', in commemoration of your origins. You try to kill yourself by biting your own tongue, and he stops you and knocks you out to prevent any more funny business. Thus concludes your first day in Kuro Yoshiwara...

After putting you to bed, the barkeep brings Hibari the old newspaper he asked for, and informs him that there are suspicious characters hanging around the brothel quarters. The papers reveal news about a boat that capsized near the coast of Kumano, and a girl who drifted to shore with all her memory lost.

He speculates that this girl is Nanami, but cannot be sure that you are the rumoured mermaid, since your anatomy is fully human. He decides to investigate further.

Next morning, he makes you promise not to take your own life again, before loosening your restraints. He comments that your hands feel cold and are covered in scars - probably from your previous fishing job.

He tells you that he, too, was sold to this brothel just like you. However, he did not despair, and eventually became the Top Host here. He can afford whatever he wants and is allowed to exit the gates freely as he pleases. He admits that, if he ever quits, he has no relatives left and hence nowhere else to go.

He gives you a dried specimen of the oiransou plant - so named because its aroma is similar to the powder used by courtesans - and asks you to put it in his room if you make up your mind to become the next oiran; he would be your mentor.

After his morning nap, he bumps into you near the dressing mirror and asks you to sit down. He proceeds to... do your makeup. He wants to take you out to Asakusa for the day, to lift your spirits and prepare you for courtesan training.

It's your first time in a big city and, upon arrival, you almost get run over by the tram, so he holds your hand to keep you by his side. First he takes you to his acquaintance tailor and acquires a yuuzen uchikake-kimono and some casual wear for you; he insists on paying for them as part of his mentor duties.

After the dress fitting, he takes you to a newly opened parlour, and you both try this thing called an 'ice cream soda' for the first time. You stare at him as he shows you how to eat it, then you finally crack a smile when you get your first taste of this treat.

He remarks that you look more childlike and approachable when you laugh, but warns you not to show this side of yourself easily to clients if you want to become a good oiran.

As a special treat, he takes you to Ryōunkaku, the tallest building in Japan at the time, and the first to have an electric lift. You ride up to the 12th floor to see the panoramic view of Tokyo (the lift scares you half to death XD), and he points out all the landmarks to you: Sumida River, Sensou-ji,...

With the coin-operated telescope, you notice a disturbance near the gates of Yoshiwara. The two of you hurry back via rickshaw. There has been a disagreement, and some women tried to escape but were caught. They could neither return to the brothel nor start over elsewhere, as a result, they were forced to either seek death or take a medicine that would render them invalids.

Hibari warns you to be careful not to end up like them.

In the middle of the night, Hibari is awakened to news that Nanami has tried to escape. He rushes to the dungeon where you are held captive and asks you why you're doing this, despite his repeated warnings.

You attempt to bite your tongue again, but he stops you and claims that, since he's the one who bought you, you are not allowed to escape nor die without his consent. He calls you a 'caged bird' and explains the origins of the 'pinky swear':

For the courtesans of Yoshiwara, the only path to freedom is to rise through the ranks and become an oiran, who would then have unrestricted mobility and the ability to choose her clients/work.

In the past when a courtesan fell in love, she would *work extra hard* in order to be an oiran. During this time, she would make a pinky promise with her loved one: even though her customers may do whatever they want with her body, her heart belongs to him alone.

And so Hibari offers his pinky, in order to show you how committed he is to making you an oiran. He gives you the option to bite it off, but your *inner vampire* is off that day. Before he leaves, he asks if you still want to die, and seems content to see that you have wavered a little.

You knock on his door the following night, dressed in the yuuzen robe he bought for you, and hands him the dried oiransou to signal your resolve.

Aaaand you are on your way to courtesanhood. First things first, he will teach you some basic rules of Yoshiwara. He starts off with the toko-sakazuki: the practice of a mutual toast between newly-weds before their first night together - this tradition is also observed at Yoshiwara for the first time between a courtesan and a client.

Hibari tries to make up excuses for using amazake (a type of light, sweet wine), but later admits that he can't hold his liquor - although he is still Top Host without being three sheets to the wind every night. As the two of you drink, you share your childhood stories, and he thinks living in a fishing village sounds like fun, with surprise items floating to shore that make every day feel like a treasure hunt.

He tells you that he's already been sold off to Yoshiwara since he was old enough to remember, and so he's always been curious about life outside of these gates. While he has no complaints about his current situation, he isn't exactly ecstatic about it either.

As he gets more inebriated, he studies your face and says that you will become an oiran very soon, you've got what it takes. Men will be fighting for you, and he advises you to *snort in the face* of those you don't like, until you find the one that you really want. You are his chosen pawn in the Kuro Yoshiwara Game, and he wants to see you achieve happiness with your own two hands.

Finally, he plants a couple of drunken kisses on you before passing out... Whoever said romance was dead? ;3

#otome #drama cd #rejet #kuro yoshiwara #melancholia #kuromela #seiyuu #toriumi kousuke #supernatural #historical #wafuu #yoshiwara

15 notes · View notes

xbarrjallenx · 5 years

Text

The Only One

Pairing: Newt Scamander x Reader

Summary: A drunk and cheeky Newt asked (Y/N) to give him some love once again. Would the latter grant his request before their reunion night came to an end?

Word count: 2.890

Posted: 12th of December 2018

A/N: And here is the third and the final part of Happier! I don’t know how it turned out, but I did my best to give it a fair ending. Please leave some feedbacks, because I really need to know what you think about it, so please please, I am desperately begging you.

My song inspiration for this part is Ed Sheeran’s “One”. It is one of my favourite songs, so please give it a listen. Thank you very much for the love and support!

- G. x

P.S.: Tumblr is having problems with links in the post, so if you want to read the first and the second part, you can go to my profile and search for Happier and Give Me Love in my Masterlist, under Fantastic Beasts section. Thank you and sorry for the inconvenience!

Tags: @atlas-of-a-human-soul; @i-ship-it-ironically; @dreacantsleep; @writtenbypics; @themagicforceofmischief; @ann-is-amazing-person; @llealia

“Wha-,” Your eyes grew wide in shock as soon as you heard his request, which was also a kind of a confession, and your heart hastily pounded against your chest. “What? Newt, are you okay?” You were startled, because he wasn’t a very straightforward person before, but his older brother and your best friend just widely smiled to encourage you to believe him.

Give me love like never before, because after all this time, I still feel the same for you.

You were completely confused and your brain suddenly seized by hearing his muffled, but still understandable words. Well, that was the most bemusing thing that you have ever heard in your life.

What did he just say? He still felt the same for you? He still loved you? He wanted for you to love him again? Absurd!

“It’s okay, if you do-,” Newt started his indistinctive mumbles once again, but Leta cut him off as she pushed you closer to him, giggling in excitement. You almost knocked him off his feet, but you thankfully gripped on the table in front of you.

“She’s going with you.”

You swore to Merlin that you have never loathed anyone in your life until that very specific moment. How would you talk to him? You didn’t have any shots of firewhisky to build your courage high, what were you going to tell him?

“Good night!” The couple greeted you as soon as you and Newt bid your goodbye. You rolled your eyes at the sight of their cheeky smiles, but then you just shrugged it off. Newt was still a special person for you, after all.

The journey to Newt’s home was rather quiet and awkward. Many things ran through your clouded mind, but Newt didn’t seem to be bothered by any of his thoughts. In fact, he was being carefree as he hummed to a song that you barely recognised.

Give me love like never before, but how would you if he already had Tina? I still feel the same for you, when did he exactly realise it?

You walked beside him, your steps were serene, but his were messy, obviously because of the drunkenness. The space between you was just right, not too far, not that near either, but sometimes your hand would brush against his and you couldn’t deny that a powerful electricity would still gush through your veins. You longed for him, you longed for his touch and you missed him so much, his confession might be true, but then you realised: he was just drunk. You shouldn’t be too delusional!

“You are too quiet tonight, my (Y/N). What are you thinking about?” Newt instantaneously blurted out, grabbing your icy-cold hand to halt you from walking for a little while.

“Huh?” You were shocked for his direct actions too, mostly for him calling you his, but you quickly calmed down as his hand gave you the warmth that you were searching for ever since you got out of Theseus’ house. The cold winter breeze slightly woke him up, but the circulating alcohol in his system still kept him warm.

“What are you thinking about?” He repeated his question and your heart skipped its beat once again as he tightened his grip on your freezing hand. He still had the same effect on you, he still invigorated you.

“Nothing.” You lied through your teeth and, although you hated on doing it, you retracted your hand from his grasp and kept on walking. You heard him groan in annoyance, but he kept on walking in zigzags.

“(Y/N)!” He childishly whined to call your attention. This wasn’t obviously the Newt that you used to know, but well, ta-da, alcohol’s work, but you loved seeing him act in that way. He slightly made you chuckle, but you quickly stopped it, so you wouldn’t give him the wrong idea.

“What did you drink with your brother tonight, Mr. Scamander?” You raised an eyebrow while you waited for him to be beside you again. “Well, apart from the Champagne.”

“Fire-whis-keey!” He honestly answered, exaggeratedly emphasising every syllable of the word. Oh, what a naughty Hufflepuff!

“Firewhisky?” If it weren’t a night full of surprises! His simple answer suddenly explained why you had a very straightforward Newt Scamander in front of you. That alcoholic drink gifted courage. Every sear that your throat would endure was equivalent to a great quantity of courage. “Theseus, ugh!”

“Actually, it was my choice.” He slightly giggled as he looked at your perplexed, but annoyed facial expression. “It bu-burnt my throat a lot. How did you manage drinking that?”

You just rolled your eyes in response, but your gaze softened when you realised that you were slowly feeling comfortable with Newt once again. After all, you were having a normal conversation right now, as if he didn’t say anything bonkers minutes before. “I was broken hearted and I wanted to forget you. What about you? What is your motive?”

“Forget me?” He playfully scoffed as he remembered the last night you saw each other. “I remember otherwise.”

“Oh, shut up, Scamander!” You vexedly slapped his chest as he continuously teased, but you both burst into a noisy laughter soon after, making some chaos in the serene street you were walking on. “So, what is your motive? Are you trying to forget someone too?”

You avoided his gaze as Tina Goldstein came across your mind. Was he doing the same thing you did when you wanted to forget him? Was he ruining himself too to relieve his broken heart? Did Tina even break his heart? If yes, how could she? Newt was the most amazing person that you have ever known in your life.

He stopped you once again from walking, gripping on your arm this time. “No, stop torturing yourself with your useless thoughts! I did it just because I wanted to have an overflowing amount of courage on doing this.”

Newt nonchalantly pulled you close to him, your body tenderly bumping against his. His warm hand was brought on your crimson red cheek and he suddenly leant in to press a gentle kiss on your quivering lips. Saying that you were flabbergasted wasn’t enough, you never expected for this to happen!

Newt was literally out of his mind, but you realised that you were too, when you chose to flutter close your eyes and move your lips together with his. You missed this, you missed him. Your heart was crazily beating, because of the tenderness of his touch. You were kissing him again, after months of not seeing each other, after months of avoiding each other.

The kiss was so romantic and sweet, needy at the right point. He missed you, he needed you and to deepen the kiss even more, he slithered his arms around your waist, while you brought yours around his neck, slowly tugging your icy-cold fingers in his messy dark-auburn locks. His massive lips gave you comfort and warmth, albeit the bitter taste of the alcohol invaded your taste buds. His touch brought you to another world, a world where all the wrong things seemed so right and the right things seemed so wrong.

“Newt!” You called him out in the middle of your little making out session in one of the serene and quiet streets of London. You loved everything about it, you loved locking lips with him once again, but a little thought rapidly brought you back to the reality. “This is wrong.”

“Your lips and your body said otherwise, love.” Newt cheekily smirked as soon as you pushed him away from you, hands sadly leaving his tousled hair. You wanted to stay in his arms the whole night, but it was all wrong.

You were confused as different emotions wrapped your system: worry, because you still longed for his warmth, although it was erratic and inappropriate; sadness, because he wasn’t yours to hold anymore; agony, because your heart still beat for him even after he hurt you; nostalgia, because the taste that his lips allowed awakened most of your wonderful memories with him.

“Oh, the guy who flirts with you at work. Right!” Newt’s smirk speedily faltered as he remembered something that has been mentioned during the dinner earlier. How could he be so stupid sometimes?

You shook your head in response, hoping that he would understand that the guy meant really nothing to you. “I actually meant your girl, Tina.” You softly pronounced her name and warm teardrops briskly rolled down your face.

The thought of her having the man that you once loved broke you, hurt you.

“You don’t have to worry about her.” Newt assured you with a soft purr as he pulled you close to him once again. “Stop crying.”

“Why?” You asked while he cupped your cheeks with his calloused hand and wiped your hot tears with his thumbs just like how he used to.

Give me love like never before, because after all this time, I still feel the same for you.

His words echoed through the walls of your fuzzy mind once again and you just knew that the time of asking him what he really meant earlier came. After all, he didn’t answer your question regarding his new love interest.

“Newt?” You calmly called and he hummed in response to tell you that he was listening. “What do you even mean when you asked me to give you love like never before?”

Newt considered your eyes and squeezed your cheeks sheepishly. “It’s not that hard to understand, (Y/N).”

“I know, but all of this is bonkers for me, Newt!” You truthfully explained, grabbing his coat’s sleeves to take his hands off your reddened face. “I don’t even know if I should believe you or not.”

“Why is it difficult to believe me?” He eagerly asked and you just unleashed a long and heavy sigh before starting to walk once again. “Is it because I am drunk?”

“Yes,” You confidently and honestly answered. “aren’t you?”

“May I ask you a question, (Y/N)?” He asked as he walked towards your direction, still following you in zigzags. He kept on dropping important topics aside and he started getting on your nerves.

“Answering a question with another question isn’t very respectful, Mr. Scamander,” You sarcastically told him, shaking your head as you saw him struggling to walk properly. “but fire away.”

“Did you really mean what you said to me that night? That you would wait for me until she breaks my heart?” He brought the most improper topic up, still having lots of courage in his store. He never had the chance to ask you about it, he started avoiding you and you started avoiding him, right? This was his time.

You suddenly stopped from walking as you remembered what you told him that night and you suddenly felt a pang in your chest. Why did you do this to yourself? “Should I still wait for a very long time?”

“Answering a question with another question isn’t very respectful, (Y/N).” The cheeky Hufflepuff fired back, copying your statement minutes before. Touché, but couldn’t he be serious for just one time?

“Newton Scamander!” You pouted while you severely scolded him. He just laughed at your actions, but stopped on walking to face you.

“What?”

“You are so miffing!” You whined and you earned more tumultuous laughs from him. He could be very annoying, but he acted that way even when he was sober, so you just shook it off.

Well, he was so adorable when he would enjoy himself and it somehow fluttered your heart, breaking the thick walls that you were slowly building around your heart, in case he revealed you something that would hurt you by the end of your inexhaustible walk.

“But yes, I did mean every single word I said that night. Why would you think that I would lie?” You seriously asked him, making him stop from laughing. “Because I was drunk?”

“Exactly my point, love!” He slightly chuckled while he walked back towards your direction to grab your hand and pulled you as you both walked together. “You know, even though I am drunk, I am still aware of what I am doing, (Y/N), because I know what my heart wants.”

“And what does your heart want?” You curiously asked, considering his bluish-green orbs as you walked hand in hand. You weren’t paying attention to where you were going, but he still guided you. Was it you or Newt the drunk one?

“Another request for the night!” He blurted out with a wide grin on his face. He changed your topic once again and he was really trying to annoy you.

This limitless walk with Newt seemed like a very long rollercoaster ride. It was a walk full of ups, downs and loops of emotions.

“Again?” You vexedly whined, childishly pouting.

“You asked me what my heart wants, (Y/N)!” He sternly exclaimed to let you know that he was being serious this time.

“Ugh,” You groaned in annoyance, but your expression lit up as you finally saw his house from afar. It would be his last request for the night. It was too much, but you didn’t want to regret anything else for the rest of your life. Seize the night, just like what Theseus said before the dinner has started. “what is it?”

You both halted on walking as soon as you reached his porch and he leant in towards your direction to mumble something in your ear. “P-Please s-stay with me.”

“S-s-stay with you?” You terribly stuttered while curiosity and anxiety filled your senses. You couldn’t believe that he was requesting such thing from you, in fact you thought it was just one of his lame ways to make fun of you, but when you considered his stunning eyes, he seemed very sober and earnest. “Newt?”

“Yes,” He nodded sincerely with a warm toothy smile plastered on his face. “please stay with me forever.”

“Huh?” You harshly bit your lower lip, unanswerable questions popping in your head. “I don’t understand. How about Tina? Where is Tina? Why are you asking me this? What are you, Newt? Insane?”

Newt just shook his head in disbelief, letting go of your hand as he pulled you close to him. He was so touchy, still alcohol’s works, but you loved it when he welcomed your body in a lighthearted embrace.

“You might have noticed that I was happy with Tina that time, but the truth is that I am happier with you, (Y/N).” He truthfully confessed while he lovingly caressed your hair with his fingers. His voice was gloomy, but honest. He was hurt when you walked away from him that night, because that was when he realised that you were his everything. He realised that leaving the only person that he loved the most was the greatest mistake that he has ever done in his life and he wanted that person back. He needed you back. “I only have these eyes for you and I realised how important you are to me.”

You were important to him? That confession overwhelmed you even more. He still wanted you in his life and you were having mixed emotions once again, but this time, you could barely explain to yourself what you were exactly feeling, but happiness was surely dominating.

“Did she break your heart?” You calmly asked, being as stupid as Newt when he pointed out the guy who flirted with you at work during a very serious moment.

“All my senses came to light, (Y/N).” He softly mumbled as he left a sweet kiss on your temple. You shut your eyes as you enjoyed Newt’s presence, smelling his perfume as you buried your head on the crook of his neck. “I still love you, (Y/N).”

He still loved you! He still did and that moment seemed so surreal for you that you were so afraid to let him go, because you thought that might just lose him again. It seemed like a very unrealistic dream, because he took you back to him in just a heart beat. You were back in his arms, you were back in your own home.

“A-are you staying?” His voice nonchalantly broke, confidence and courage slowly deflating when he didn’t hear you answer back. “(Y/N)?”

“I love you too, Newt, and I am absolutely staying with you!” You suddenly hugged him back, snaking your arms around his torso tightly. He wanted you back and, it was useless to not grant his last request, because you wanted him too, you needed him too. “Please don’t ever leave me again, Newt.”

You kept your eyes solidly shut and your grip around his body was even tighter.

“I already made a mistake when I left you once, my little (Y/N). I wouldn’t forgive myself if I made another one.” He honestly muttered, planting a kiss on the top of your head while some choked sobs left his lips. The fear of completely losing you was still fresh in his mind.

“Newt, my love,” You comforted him by rubbing his back with your hands. “I am here now.”

“And I promise I’ll never leave again,” He proudly pledged, both of your hearts beating as one. “because you are the only one, my only one.”

#newt scamander x reader #newt scamander #newt scamander angst #newt scamander one shot #newt scamander imagine #newt scamander fluff #eddie redmayne fluff #eddie redmayne x reader #eddie redmayne imagines #eddie redmayne #xbarrjallenx #masterlist #fantastic beasts imagine #fantastic beasts and where to find them #crimes of grindlewald imagines #crimes of grindelwald #happier #give me love

596 notes · View notes

northsidemarleyrose · 5 years

Text

Lost and Found || HummelRose

WHO: Marley Rose and Aaron Hummel MENTIONS (in alphabetical order): Blaine Anderson, Darius Anderson, Rachel Berry, Bethany Cohen-Chang, Alejandro Hart, Jackson Hayward, Kurt Hummel, Santana Lopez, Jake Puckerman, Nathan Puckerman, Charlie Rose, and Sebastian Smythe, plus Frank Abernathy, Millie Rose, and Natalie Turner. WHERE: Riverdale and Greendale WHEN: June 28, 2019 - July 12th, 2019 NOTES: This covers from the time that Marley took off after being released from the hospital until Aaron finally finds her. TRIGGERS: Mentions of violence, semi-suicidal thoughts? (maybe? but putting it here just in case), heartache galore, mentions of killings/death. WORD COUNT: 13,402

Five days after being admitted into Riverdale General the doctors finally had given Marley permission to leave, with the promise that she’d take it easy. Throughout the morning she had slowly begun packing up her belongings, with the help of Aaron of course, as he really hadn’t left since he’d found out she was in the hospital, minus for his own therapy. The minute she’d woken up and seen him there she’d known there was no way she would be able to argue with him about staying, she’d been far too stubborn about that a couple weeks ago after he got stabbed.

Throughout the past five days she’d felt less and less like herself. Charlie was in a coma because she’d intervened when her father, the actual Black Hood, had gotten his hands on her and she’d been too weak to do too much damage to him before he attacked her. She didn’t know if she could face her mother or her sister outside of these walls, she didn’t know what was going on with Blaine, or if she ever wanted to try and face him again after what he’d done to Aaron. She already felt so guilty. Guilty about not seeing what everyone else had apparently seen, guilty for everything that her father had done right under her nose and for when she was a child, just … guilty, so freaking guilty. She didn’t want to be in Riverdale anymore but she’d been stuck in the hospital until the doctors finally released her, Aaron by her side the entire time, especially when her mother couldn’t be there.

By day three she’d started devising a plan. She knew she was going to be released soon and there was no way she could go back home. Not after what had happened, not after what Frank had confessed, what he’d wanted, what he’d done. Her memory was still a little fuzzy on what had happened but she had a fairly pieced together memory of the evening.

While she knew she had options for places to stay, Aaron’s, Beth’s, probably even Charlie’s, if Darius would allow it, she didn’t want to be near anyone in any sort of capacity. The only reason she hadn’t asked Aaron to leave yet was because she knew he’d fight tooth and nail and throw everything she’d said to him a couple weeks prior in her face, plus, she needed him completely believing she was okay for her plan to work out without any bumps along the way. She didn’t have a plan B here, so she had to put everything into plan A and that included making everyone see that she was okay, even though that was the furthest thing from the truth that she could imagine.

Marley had a friend in Greendale who was currently abroad in Europe for a few more weeks. She’d already been checking in on the house every now and then like Natalie had asked. Going there was the clear choice. It was somewhere people wouldn’t know about or think to look. It was somewhere she could finally be alone, actually alone, not “getting a chance to sit alone in the bathroom for five minutes before someone asking if she was okay” alone. It was somewhere she wouldn’t be followed or monitored or have anyone there to expect things from her. The guilt was absolutely eating away at her, including the guilt of holding this plan in herself.

Her plan was fairly simple, but had the ability to go disastrously wrong of things didn’t happen the exact way she needed them too. Around mid morning she mentioned to Aaron that she could really go for a milkshake before leaving, knowing full well the hospital cafeteria would not have that and he’d have to leave to get it from Pop’s. Luckily he agreed, “anything for you, pretty girl,” were his exact sentiments. Once he’d left the room she scrambled to gather the rest of her things in a slight hurry, not even thinking about the possibility of him turning back for a moment, waited what she assumed was an appropriate amount of time, and then made her way out a lesser used exit, intent on getting to Greendale on a bus. She wished she could drive, it would be easier, but with her broken wrist that just wasn’t possible, plus, Aaron was currently using her car, so the bus would have to do.

Luckily she made it out of the hospital and to Greendale without any issues. The one thing about such a small town was that it always felt like everyone’s eyes were on you, especially nowadays. By the time she reached Natalie’s house she was already exhausted. Five days of basically doing nothing had not been good for her. Five days without a moment alone to really let everything that had happened sink in? That was even worse. The first thing she did when she was securely inside, all doors locked and curtains drawn, was strip everything she’d had on from the hospital and shower, being sure to cover her cast first of course. She hadn’t anticipated how difficult that was going to be and she really thanked god that Frank had grabbed her left wrist and not her right.

After what was probably just over a half an hour just trying to rid herself of hospital smell she found a couple of the items Bethany had brought her, items that weren’t even her own and put them on. Wearing something she had no real connection to and wasn’t hospital wear was actually kind of nice, in a really weird sort of way.

She curled up on the couch, blankets cocooned around her, and finally let go. Let go of the guilt eating away at every fibre of her being. She let every tear that she’d so stubbornly held back finally fall. Second by second feeling more loss, more sorrow, and more guilt than she ever had known could be inside of one person. She’d spent so long pretending to be somewhat okay, somewhat making it through, and now she was finally freeing herself of that pressure, she finally felt how lost she was. She wasn’t herself anymore. She felt an emptiness in her gut, something that hadn’t even been there when Frank left them all those years ago.

Marley wasn’t Marley anymore, at least not in her eyes. As she sat there falling apart, she knew that what had kept her whole all of these years, through every hardship she’d ever been through, was gone. That part of her was destroyed. Blaine had started chipping at it first, with what he’d done to Aaron, but Frank? Frank had taken everything that could be used for destruction and smashed it to smithereens. Slowly, as the tears began to slow down, she felt the numbness creep in. She felt the hopelessness taking over and she welcomed it. Anything was better than the sobs that had been racking her body for hours. As she “calmed” she stared at the home around her, really taking in her surroundings. It wasn’t hers but at least it held no memories of her own home, somewhere that made her sick to her stomach with just a quick thought. Her safe haven, her childhood playground, gone forever, at least in her mind. How could she ever return there? Frank had come so close to killing them both there, and probably their mom too. Her hand found its way to the the stitches she still had in her head. She winced, but she wasn’t entirely sure if it was from the physical pain or the emotional pain of the memory.

Eventually night fell but Marley was so out of it that she hardly even noticed. After a while she checked her phone, which had been on silent, for the time, ignoring the numerous texts and voicemails, mainly all from Aaron or her mother, on the home screen. 1:03 AM. It was way later than she had expected, the only saving grace was that it was technically a new day. She switched her phone off, not wanting to deal with anyone trying to reach her, especially Aaron and his constant trying, texting and calling. She felt awful but she was afraid of saying the wrong thing, of lashing out. Nothing anyone could say would fix this, fix her. This was her truth now, a broken shell of the person she once felt she was.

Part of her wished she wasn’t alone, granted a very small part of her, and a part she knew would never win, she could never let it win, but unfortunately it still existed. Part of her wanted a very particular person around. Maybe if that person had been Aaron or Bethany or even her mother, maybe she could have gone back, but it wasn’t. That person wasn’t even Charlie, even though she’d do anything to know that she’d woken up and was okay. It was Blaine and she hated that, she hated that it was always him, even after everything he’d done. It wasn’t that she wanted whoever Blaine was now, she didn’t even want to look at who he’d become, but it was the Blaine she grew up with, shared so many of her memories with, that she needed. It was the Blaine who’d married her in her backyard just to make her feel a little bit better that she craved. The Blaine who’d told her to try and climb Alejandro like a tree. She longed for the Blaine who would lay on the grass with her in her backyard after a hard day and just hold her hand and let her stay silent. Marley had no idea if that Blaine even existed anymore, and that was something she could hardly bear. Blaine was gone. Marley felt gone. Nothing would ever be the same again.

Eventually, after what felt like hours, Marley fell asleep. It wasn’t a restful sleep, she didn’t know when those would ever be a part of her life again, if they’d ever be a part of her life again, but sleep was sleep, even when racked by nightmares.

The days passed and Marley slipped into a mundane routine. She seldom left the couch, usually only to get whatever single meal she had delivered for the day, only using the cash Natalie left for her as payment. She tried to watch TV but it couldn’t hold her focus. She tried sleeping her time away but the nightmares racked her mind whenever she closed her eyes. She knew she looked a mess, pitying whatever poor delivery person had to see the state she was in ut she couldn’t even bring herself to fix the issue. She turned her phone on occasionally, but would be quickly overwhelmed the minute the texts and voicemails all came through, especially when it was Bethany or her mother or her sister, who had thankfully woken up. The only good she got from seeing that Charlie was texting her was knowing she was awake. She’d gotten pretty used to Aaron’s texts and calls, they were the most frequent, but something about knowing Bethany was crying, Marley could hear it in every voicemail, just shook her too much. It felt like almost everyone she knew was trying to get a hold of her. Darius, if only to calm Charlie down, and Jackson too, for the same reason but with Bethany. Even people she hadn’t expected to care were reaching out too, people like Nathan and Rachel, not that it made her any more inclined to return, it was just more people she was ultimately disappointing. It wouldn’t be long until she’d delete any voicemails and turn her phone back off. She didn’t want anyone around. No one should have to see what she’d become. She didn’t even feel human anymore. Eating only when absolutely necessary, sleeping only when it finally took over, mostly just wasting away. Blaine used to compare her to a flower, well now she was one … just a very wilted comparison to the one she used to be. Too far gone in her own eyes.

Her father was a murderer, a serial killer at that. He had killed her friends and he wanted her and Charlie to carry on his legacy. Legacy, what is a legacy? Was it fate? Was she destined to become as terrible as him, was she already? Was there really a darkness inside her that was passed down from the man for with she had half of his DNA? She could hardly live with herself just knowing about the awful things he’d done. His blood coursing through her veins. When this got out, if it hadn’t already, she knew people would be out for revenge. She’d seen it with Aaron when Burt had been so wrongfully arrested. Burt Hummel had not been the Blackhood. Her own father had, and had been doing it for her? For their family? Wanted her to join him in ridding the town of sinners? None of it made sense. Her father had been a good man, the best dad when they were growing up, that was, until he left, or at least, she’d thought that. Now she knew the truth, the whole truth, and it terrified the fuck out of her. Was anybody really who they said they were? First Blaine, now her father, before anyone knew it, they’d see her true colours too, the monster she would inevitably become alongside them.

Eventually, she found herself wishing she’d never even been born. Her birthday was tainted forever now too, so what was the point in celebrating it ever again? What was the point of anything? Her own father, someone who she thought had loved her more than anything in the world, loved her sister more than anything in the world, could have killed them both. He killed his grandchild, her niece or nephew, Charlie’s child, and he’d done it on purpose, like so many others before. Her anger began to boil over. How could he be like that!? How could she have been so blind!? A scream ripped through her body, like a wildfire finding a clear path after simmering for a while. She grabbed something close, a plate, and threw it at the wall, watching as it smashed into pieces. That wasn’t enough. She looked for something else, a mug, and suddenly it’s pieces were mixed with those of what used to be the plate.

Marley sat there, catching her breath. After a moment she realized what she’d done. Those weren’t her dishes. This wasn’t her house. She really was starting to see the darkness inside of her and it was slowly creeping its way to the surface. She couldn’t be bothered to clean the mess up, not yet at least.

For some reason, unbeknownst to her, she decided to check her phone again and this time there was an unknown number that left had left a message. The minute she heard Blaine’s voice she dropped her phone. How was he calling her? Wasn’t he locked up in the hospital somewhere? She was sure that was what Darius had told her. Aaron actually went to see him, after what Blaine had done to Aaron? She couldn’t possibly mean that much to the other man, she couldn’t, there was no way. He’d never even actually told her about what his feelings were so she had to assume they were still just friends, despite her own strong feelings towards him so he needed to stop trying to find her, to contact her. She listened to Blaine’s message again, and again. She didn’t know why she was doing that to herself, hearing his voice made her want to vomit, but once she could see past that, it also made her feel more at home than she had felt in days. Another call came in when she was about to listen to it one more time, so she saved Blaine’s message and sent the next call, Aaron, of course, to voicemail.

Once he’d left her yet another message she listened to it. His voice cracked and she could feel her own tears falling onto her lap. “Stop,” she said, even though he wasn’t on the other end of the line. “Stop calling. Stop trying. Please stop, for the love of God, Aaron, please stop.” She saved that message too, even though she’d already deleted so many voicemails from him before, and everyone else that had tried to get in contact with her. She didn’t know what to do, she was hurting people by isolating herself, but going back, talking to someone, well that just wasn’t an option. Not right now, and she had no idea when it would be an option. She still had a lot of time before she even had to realistically think about it, Natalie was gone for a while still. After a while she laid down and closed her eyes, squeezing them shut really, not able to look at the destruction she was capable of with not a single thought. She willed sleep to take over, and for the first time since she’d arrived, she got something she wanted.

When she woke it was yet another day. Another day of emptiness. Another day of fear. Another day of nothing. Marley went about her day as usual, a lot of nothing. Eventually she got up and attempted to clean the mess she’d made the previous night, but her hands were so clumsy with the cast that she ended up slicing her palm decently. Moving the quickest she had in days she dressed the wound. She managed to get the injury dealt with in a timely manner, much to her own surprise. She felt like she couldn’t do anything right, not even attempting to clean up her own mess. If that wasn’t a sign, she didn’t know what was. She sat down on the bathroom floor and pulled her phone out and turned it on again, but she didn’t really know why. Marley knew there would be texts and voicemails and she knew she wouldn’t answer them. It’s not that she didn’t care, she cared more than she was willing to admit. She missed everyone. She wanted to see Charlie more than she ever had in her whole life. She’d never gone this long without seeing her mom. She knew she was hurting those she claimed to love so much, but she couldn’t help it. This was who she was now. She was a broken shell of the person she used to be and no one deserved to be exposed to that. Of course Aaron texted again, right then in that moment, and she just shook her head. Why couldn’t he take a hint? She was gone. She might as well be dead. He needed to give it up, give her up.

Before she could realize what she was doing, she was typing a response. She needed him to leave her alone. She needed to not have to worry about him worrying. She had it out with him right there, their first communication in days. She didn’t sugarcoat a thing. She did everything she possibly could to get him to forget it, forget them, whatever they were, she wasn’t the same person and there was no way he’d want her in any capacity anymore and he needed to realize that. She didn’t hold back and it was new to her. Sure, Aaron has heard the harsher side of her before, but nothing like this. Time passed and she eventually grew tired of arguing with him, he was exhausting. She should have known he would have tried to make this about him and how much he was hurting. Couldn’t he just get the fact that she was broken, that she didn’t want him to find her, that she was just … done. She turned her phone off again, not caring if he responded or not.

That night was a hard one, possibly the hardest night she’d had since she’d arrived. Marley sat and kept thinking about her conversation with Aaron, feeling guilty, even if she didn’t want to. In all reality, she knew he didn’t deserve that. He was good, the problem was, she didn’t think she was good anymore. She was broken, lost, and a shell. She didn’t recognize the person who looked back at her in the mirror. Aaron could do better, easily. For the first time in a while, she began to cry. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she missed him. She missed her mom and her sister. And as much as she would never admit out loud, not after everything she’d recently learned, she missed Blaine. She missed Beth and Alejandro. But it was better this way, it had to be.

Marley didn’t end up sleeping until the wee hours of the morning and it wasn’t something she would have called particularly restful. She’d grown used to the nightmares but these were extra awful. When she finally woke, Marley realized she hadn’t eaten a thing the previous day. She went over to the kitchen where she’d been keeping the cash she had left and realized she didn’t have any left, well, anything more than three dollars and sixty-seven cents. She sighed loudly, annoyed. Shrugging to herself she knew that she needed to eat something so she dug out her credit card and logged onto Natalie’s computer and used that to order food.

When she heard a knock at the door, she didn’t think anything of it, despite that it was louder than any of her previous deliveries. Slowly she got up. “I’m coming,” she shouted through the door. “Have some damn patience…” she then mumbled to herself when the pounding didn’t stop. When she opened the door, it was not who she had expected, the last person she’d actually been expecting to see. Her breath caught in her throat and she froze before quickly trying to shut the door again.

Aaron had been going crazy looking for Marley, and he finally got something. She was in Greendale, and he didn't wait before driving there. He had been looking for her for what felt like forever, and he finally could see her again. Once at the address, he started pounding on the door, hearing her voice made him keep the pounding up, she was here and he was finally going to see her again.

He only stopped when she opened the door, and just had to pause for the smallest of moments because there she was, he was really seeing her again. Before she could shut the door all the way, Aaron moved his foot into the doorway, "Marley, wait. Wait. You think shutting the door is gonna make me forget where you are?" He pushed through to get in the house, not letting this chance go to waste.

Marley instantly backed up when Aaron pushed his way past the door. She needed space. Aside from the delivery people, she hadn’t been in actual contact with people in so many days that she’d actually lost count.

“I thought I told you to leave me alone,” she managed, trying to sound as put together as possible. She looked around at the house around her, suddenly embarrassed at its disarray, even if she didn’t want him here in the least. “You should forget. You should go. Leave!”

The place did not look good, was she really staying here? Trying to avoid everyone by using a couch as a bed and smashing dishes? “No!” He didn’t move in towards her, not yet at least, “I’m not leaving, I’m not forgetting. You ran away and I couldn’t find you, now I have and there’s no fucking way I’m just going to leave.”

Marley could feel herself getting red, but for once, with Aaron, it was out of anger. What right did he think he had to be here? What right did he have to be angry when she told him to leave her alone? He was completely out of line.

“Turn around and go home, Aaron. You shouldn’t be here,” Marley replied, with a lot more force than she thought she had in her. Sure, it was taking every ounce of fading energy in her body, but she meant it, or at least she thought she did. “I don’t want you here. I don’t need you.”

“I don’t fucking care if you think you don’t want or need me here, Marley!” Aaron didn’t want to yell, but he couldn’t leave, he didn’t know how he had managed without her being in Riverdale with him. “I need you. I want you. I don’t care if I shouldn’t be here, I am, and I’m not leaving you here.” He could ignore the force in her voice and he could ignore her words because there was no way she was getting rid of him now.

Tears began to burn Marley’s eyes and she tried to will them away, but like most of her efforts to do anything as of late, she failed. She didn’t even bother to wipe them away as she turned away from Aaron, retreating to the couch and the safety of her blankets. She sighed before she said anything. “You think you need me,” she answered quietly, not even sure if he’d hear her. “Just go before I ....” She couldn’t finish the sentence, she didn’t even know where she was going with that, she just wanted him to leave her be.

This time he moved, he moved towards the couch and sat down. “I don’t think I need you, I know I need you. You can ask anyone, I’ve been a mess looking for you, I didn’t know how to function right when I had no clue where you were.” That was true, he’d been a complete mess since she ran from the hospital, “You’re not getting rid of me. I’m not leaving unless you leave with me.”

When Aaron sat down she moved herself the furthest she could away that the couch would allow, legs pulled up to her chest. She didn’t want to hear about him hurting. Despite everything she’d said to him recently, she knew she still loved him. She sat in silence, not knowing what to say now that he was clearly not mad anymore and probably only reacting to everything she’d been giving him. She wiped her face and stared at the floor, not sure she could actually look at him.

“I can’t go back.”

Aaron didn’t move closer, if she wanted to keep this space then he’d let her. “Why not?” Though, he kind of figured why, a lot had happened and he understood running away, but he needed her to come back with him. “You can’t run away forever, you need to come back. Otherwise you might need to make space of your couch bed because both of us staying on it might get a little crowded.”

Those were the only options she was getting, either she comes back to town or he stays here with her. Either way, he wasn’t going to just forget that Marley was in Greendale avoiding everyone.

Marley fidgeted with the bandage around her right palm, not that that was an easy distraction given her other wrist was in a cast, but it was easier than looking at Aaron.

She didn’t like her options here. She didn’t like that she knew it would be easier to just give in too. She couldn’t go home. Not yet, even if she wanted to see her mom that badly.

“Because,” she said, still fidgeting. “I just can’t. I don’t want to face ... anyone.” The tears didn’t stop and they were definitely picking up their own pace. If she had the courage in her to just close the gap between her and Aaron, maybe she could find some sort of calm, but even that small task seemed too much.

Since she didn’t seem to be angry now, Aaron finally moved over on the couch, getting closer to her and put his arm around her. He hated seeing her cry, it hurt more than anything else that had happened to him in the recent past. “You don’t have to face anyone yet, but you do need to come back to Riverdale. You can try to semi-isolate yourself there, with me. But you can’t stay here, Marley.” He told her, trying to calm her down in any way he knew how.

Marley almost hated the way she melted into him. This was the first physical contact she’d had in a while, since she’d taken off. She shrugged, not willing to give in yet. He shouldn’t want her, not after everything she’d put him through. She was toxic. She wiped her face again, a feeble attempt really. “I’m fine here,” she lied, knowing full well she was lying and pretending he wouldn’t notice. “I don’t have anywhere to go.”

Did she really try saying she was fine here? Like he didn’t know that ”fine” was a bullshit word between them? “Yes, yes you do.” He told her, “You can come to my place. And that’s obviously 20 times better than staying on a couch with a smashed plate across from it.” There was room, and if worse came to worst, they’ve shared a bed more than once.

“I just can’t leave you here. I can’t go back to town and pretend everything’s okay when you’re here and not there, with me.”

“And mug,” Marley added under her breath. She sighed, still not ready to give up. She sat up a little, turning towards Aaron for the first time, but not yet meeting his eye. “Even if I agree, which I’m not right now, I have a lot to do here before I can even think about leaving.” She wasn’t leaving her friends house a mess, even in all her toxicity, she had some manners.

Would she go with Aaron? She hadn’t decided. It was safe here, she was safe and everyone else was safe from her. But she knew she’d missed him, more than she was willing to admit.

"We can clean up and go." Aaron said easily, he wasn't going to give up. "You can't stay here. I'm not letting you stay here by yourself." There wasn't a choice now, not since she said 'if' because that worked like a 'yes' for him right now, he was going to get her to come back to Riverdale, and to stay with him for however long she needed, or wanted even. "Please, Marley, I'm not leaving without you." He missed her too much, and he couldn't handle the thought of going back to town without her by his side.

Aaron had never cleaned a day in his life, at least to Marley’s knowledge. “What’s the point, Aaron?” She challenged, anger starting to brew in her gut again. “Why do you care so goddamn much!?” She hated that her emotions were being so unpredictable, it made her feel out of control, which to be fair, she was. She pointed to the smashed dishes in front of them. “That’s what I do now! I break things. I’m broken.” She was weak and broken and he needed to see that, and the sooner the better.

"Because I love you!" Aaron said before he even realized it. He never liked using 'love' when talking about anyone except Elizabeth or Kurt. But even having Jake back in town and sleeping with him again, which he had missed a lot, hadn’t stopped him from realizing that what he felt for Marley now was love. And her thinking that smashing some dishes was going to make him stop caring was ridiculous.

"I love you, and I'm not going to let you sit here and think you break things or that you think I shouldn't care because I do. You're hurting, and I get it, but isolating yourself is only going to make things worse and I can't just sit here and let you do that! You've been there for me through everything I've been going through recently so I'll be damned if I let you go through shit and do nothing."

Marley snapped her head up the minute she heard the word love. She stared, frozen. She couldn’t react. Why now? Why the fuck would he say that now? Who gave him the right to turn her on her head like this. “Shut up!” She shouted, starting to panic. She was hyperventilating and she couldn’t stop.

She couldn’t stay sitting so she got up, escaping at least for a moment to the kitchen, trying to tidy to distract herself. He shouldn’t be here. He needed to leave. He needed to not love her. He didn’t know her, not anymore.

Tidying was not helping the panic but she didn’t know what else to do so she kept at it.

Of course this wasn't the best timing, but that seemed to be Aaron's specialty. But her telling him to shut up and leaving was not what he had expected her to do. "Marley, wait!" He got up and followed her to the kitchen, "Please, just calm down, I'm sorry, that wasn't the best thing to say right now with everything in your head but it came out and just please, calm down." He watched her move around, he couldn't just leave, especially now.

Marley ignored him as long as she could, which admittedly wasn’t as long as she’d like. Eventually she turned around, out of things to actually tidy up in there, and faced him again. She looked for words, not used to not having them. “...how?” She asked quietly, really meaning that. “How after everything I’ve done recently, how can you say ... that?” She hated that she still had tears in her eyes but she couldn’t be bothered to try and hide it from him anymore.

He stayed silent while she ignored him, and had to think about her question because...what did she mean? "You haven't done anything, Marley. I can say that because it's true, I’ve known I liked you for a while. I love you because you're amazing and wonderful and just...incredible. I don't think there's anything you can do that will make me change my mind on that."

Marley felt her legs weakening beneath her. Her lip began to quiver and she slowly sank onto the floor. Once sitting she shook her head. "I'm not," she tried to insist. "I'm not amazing or wonderful or incredible. I left you. I tricked you and left you. Purposefully. I left Charlie and my mom. I'm just like ... him." She couldn't bring herself to say his name or call him Dad. "Not only did I leave you," she continued, on a roll now. "But I was awful to you when you wouldn't stop trying. You can't deny that, Aaron. I'm gross. I'm awful. I'm not the same person. You love the idea of me."

Aaron watched her sink down, and moved down to sit across from her, trying to keep his tone as calm as possible. "Marley, you are nothing like him. He is an awful, awful person, he wanted me to stay away from you, he hurt so many people, you were just trying to do what you thought was right for everyone. You thought we'd be better off without you, you thought isolating yourself was better." He moved a little bit closer, "I love you, Marley. You're not gross, you're not awful, you're human. Sure, what you said hurt, but clearly it wasn't the worst thing because I couldn't stay away. I'm sure Charlie and Millie will understand, we all make crazy decisions when something bad happens but it does not make you a bad person. So what if you're not the same? People don't stay the same, that's how life works, no one can expect you to stay the exact same after something like this."

Marley didn't know if she'd ever heard Aaron say so much in such a short amount of time before. She also didn't remember the last time she'd been crying for so long, wondering for a brief moment when her tears might just stop for good. She let him move closer when he did, not moving further away like she so badly wanted to. He loved her. She loved him, she knew that. They weren't even together but now it was out there, they loved each other.

"I'm scared," she managed after a minute, meeting his eyes.

He shook his head, "Of course you're scared. I would be too, but you can't let yourself sink like this. You'll just feel worse about yourself and it won't end well for you, but you're not alone anymore." He moved closer again, carefully resting his hand on her arm, "I'm here, and I'll always be here for you. You were there for me during all of that shit, and now it's my turn. Please come back to Riverdale with me." Aaron said, wanting her to agree even if she was scared, because he knew he could try to help her like she had helped him.

Almost out of reflex Marley covered Aaron's hand with her own and squeezed, finally accepting him after all this time. She nodded after a moment. "Okay," she finally relented. "After I clean up, but ... I can't go home." She didn't know how this would work, but she knew that was as much as she could give right now. She'd need clothes and items that she didn't know if she could get, but she was agreeing for Aaron.

Aaron almost let out a sigh of relief when she squeezed his hand, glad she was finally touching him back and agreeing to come back. "Yes, after we clean up and get back to town, we'll avoid your place if that's what you want." He told her, "You can consider my place your own until you don't want to anymore."

Aaron was a better man than Marley knew he'd ever admit. She got up and walked over to the living room again, avoiding the dish mess for the moment. The amount of tidying needed could keep her distracted for the time being, she hadn’t exactly kept up cleaning while she’d been here. She looked over at Aaron, who was being surprisingly helpful. "Be careful over there," Marley joked quietly, motioning at her bandaged hand.

He followed her to the living room, helping clean up where he could to ensure they'd be able to leave as soon as possible. Hearing her joke, he grinned, "I'm perfectly fine, pretty girl. I can handle some smashed dishes, I mean, look at me, I'm clearly invincible." Aaron gestured to his own scars on his stomach, which were healing from his 'big Blaine betrayal', but he was glad that she was joking around. It was a sign that she was at least a little better than she was when he showed up.

Marley rolled her eyes as she folded the blankets on the couch. "Invincible, sure," she replied. As the living room started to resemble the room she'd arrived to so many days ago she felt her gut dropping. ’After we clean up and get back to town...' and now the room was much cleaner than it had been. Her few items were gathered, the same items she'd gathered with Aaron when he was supposed to drive her home the first time.

Aaron was glad when they finished, now they could go back and she'd be with him until she decided otherwise. He could help her. "Alright, are you ready to go?" He asked, looking over at her with a soft smile, "Or if you're hungry and still need a little time to psych yourself up before going back to town, we can find a place here and eat. I don't have anything to do." Pretty much all of his free time has been spent looking for her, so people probably weren't expecting to see him for hours if at all.

Marley nodded, even though everything in her was screaming otherwise. She still had more apprehension than she wanted to tell him. "I just need to ... double check that I have everything and things here are perfect." She began to dote around the house, into the different rooms, including the bathroom, shutting the door just to try and breathe.

He nodded and watched her walk away, deciding to give her space and not follow her. Plus, he didn’t have much of a reason to think she’d just leave or something, she just wanted to make sure everything was fine and prepare herself to come back.

Marley moved a few things around before sitting on the edge on the bathtub. She evened out her breathing as best she could. After a few minutes she stood, fixed her hair in the mirror, wiped her face with a damp cloth, trying to even out the redness. After another minute she finally emerged from the bathroom and grabbed her bag and faced Aaron. "Ready," she breathed out, faking a trademarked Rose Fake Smile, something she'd learn to master from her sister.

“Awesome. So food or straight to my place?” Aaron asked, sticking his hands in his pockets and grinning at her. He was trying to not overwhelm her, but he was getting more and more excited that she agreed to come back with him. And now she knows that he loves her, even if that’s most likely low priority with everything going on. It was still out there. “Either works for me, you know I can always eat no matter the situation. Maybe I’ll even try a vegetable just for you, since I convinced you to come back with me.” His tone was light, trying to keep things funny and almost like they aren’t in Greendale and just seeing each other for the first time in what felt like forever.

Marley couldn't help but notice Aaron's apparent excitement; it was almost too much. She'd missed him, a lot, despite everything she'd said to him over text the previous night or what was said when he’d shown up. "I haven't eaten yet," she answered quietly, shrugging. "I thought you were the food I ordered, but I guess it never showed up." She barely even noticed his comment about vegetables, something that would have never happened before. She still felt hollow, terrified to go back to Riverdale.

Her quietness was a little concerning, but he nodded anyways, “Then let’s go find you some food.” Aaron moved to leave the house with her, unlocking her car and slipping in the driver's seat. “If you’re really worried, I won’t tell anyone you’re back yet. It can just be you and me in a little bubble for a bit, let you adjust to things before announcing your return or something,” he told her.

Locking the door to the house, Marley put her bag in the back seat of her car and slid into the passenger seat, not something she was used to doing at all. She always drove if they used the car. It hadn't even occurred to her that Aaron would have technically still had it and the keys. She fiddled with the fingers in her lap as Aaron backed out and spoke. "Maybe," she answered. Marley didn't have a plan so she didn't really have a choice but to go along with Aaron's. Being at his place without telling anyone wouldn't be all that different, unless someone showed up. "I don't really know where any food places are around here," she admitted after a second. "I only really ordered in."

"No worries, been here enough times while looking for you and in the past for other business, I know places to eat." Aaron said, starting to pull out of the driveway and onto the road. "There's a pizza place if you're up for that, all depends on what you're in the mood for, pretty girl." He told her, trying to keep his eyes on the road and not on her to make sure she was okay.

Marley nodded. Pizza was as good as anything. Marley could feel Aaron glancing at her every so often and she hated that she hated it. She felt self-conscious. She knew she probably looked a mess and she certainly felt a mess. It was also weird being a passenger in her own car. "You shouldn't have spent so much time looking," she said quietly after a moment. She wasn't looking at him, opting to look out the window instead, taking in the unfamiliar town.

At her nod, he started going to the pizza place he was usually at whenever he was visiting Greendale. And even if she was trying to be quiet, he still heard what she said and frowned. "Of course I should have. You freaked me out by leaving, you freaked a lot of people out, I needed to find you."

Marley shrugged, shaking her head. "I needed to be alone, Aaron," she somewhat snapped, instantly regretting her tone. She sighed and looked forward, a step towards actually looking at him. "I'm sorry..." Marley trailed off. "That was uncalled for." She could feel herself starting to get mad again and Aaron didn't deserve another outburst. She was going to lose her shit eventually, she shouldn't have left the house, she shouldn't have let Aaron convince her to go, she should have worked harder to lock him out.

Marley could feel her hands fidgeting again, flicking her fingernails, wringing her fingers. She couldn't stop, she was going to lose it.

Aaron nodded, "And I get that, I really do. But I also needed to find you, since you weren't texting anyone and Charlie mentioned something that made me freak out more. Just in case it went from wanting to be alone to you getting hurt." Her snappy tone wasn't much of a bother to him, he's heard worse and he got why she was upset. He looked over at her, ready to pull over if it seemed like she needed it, and it was starting to seem like she did.

Something Aaron said caught her attention. Charlie had no right freaking Aaron out. She shook her head, annoyed at her sister, knowing it was completely unreasonable. Her leg began to bounce, a really old nervous tick of hers. "I was fine," she replied again. "I wasn't getting hurt." Though, that was technically a lie, because she had cut her hand.

“I see that, aside from you cutting your hand by smashing dishes, you’re physically fine.” Aaron knew she wasn’t mentally fine, that was obvious and he wasn’t expecting her to be anyway. “But I wasn’t sure when I was looking. And then with those stupid fucking anonymous assholes coming at me every 5 seconds, I couldn’t stop looking for you.”

Marley looked down and swallowed. She should have expected Aaron to get flack for her disappearance. The anons used everything they could to hurt people. She would not cry again, not when they were supposed to go eat and pretend everything was okay. Her feet suddenly got very interesting. No tears. That’s all she needed. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She would never be able to justify her selfish actions. She had no idea why he even forgave her.

Aaron glanced over at her again, she definitely did not look okay. More so than expected. So he found a spot and pulled over, not super far from the pizza place. “I don’t blame you for running, Marley. Not after everything that happened.” He told her, “I was never mad about it. Terrified, sure, worried, absolutely, but never mad. I need you to know that.” He added.

When Marley felt the car pull over and they weren’t in front of a pizza place she knew a speech of some sort was coming and slightly braced herself. Aaron has seemed to be taking a page out of Blaine’s book recently, talking so much at her. She listened and she nodded, doing her best to look at his face, as face she really had missed. “Okay,” she said quickly, trying to get this speech over with. “I get it. You weren’t mad.” Even if you should have been, she added in her head.

She ran her bandaged hand through her hair. “I’m okay,” she breathed out. “You can keep driving.”

He wanted to argue her being okay. Because she obviously wasn’t. But he didn’t want to go around in circles before they’re even back in town. So with a bit of reluctance, Aaron went back to driving. “So, my brother came back into town.” He started, trying to change the subject until they can get back around to Marley and what’s going on with her. Because if the positions were reversed, he’s almost positive that she wouldn’t let him off so easily.

Marley focused on making her breathing steady when Aaron pulled back onto the road. She was okay. He needed to believe that. She raised a brow at the mention of Kurt. “Kurt came back?” She asked, her curiosity peaked for the first time in a while. “When? Why?”

“The 2nd. Apparently Burt called him to beg for help and as usual, Kurt’s a better person than I would be.” Especially if he was out of Riverdale and living his dream like Kurt was, he wouldn’t come back because their dad was begging for help after being arrested. “Which was honestly awful timing, came back when I was accused of being a murderer by anonymous people who think they’re the next Sherlock Holmes or some shit.”

Marley really needed Aaron to stop bringing up that he’d been accused of something so heinous. Marley had already felt more guilty than she’d ever felt in her life and this was just making it worse. She’d messed up. Royally. And now she was going to have to live with the consequences. Pushing that down, she nodded. “Wow. That must have been a lot for Kurt. I hope he’s doing well though,” she answered, really meaning it. She had no reason to have any negative feelings towards the older Hummel, Aaron only ever said good things about his brother.

Aaron nodded, “I think he’s doing fine, can’t really do much about assholes thinking I killed Blaine beyond just believing that I didn’t.” After a couple more minutes, they pulled into the parking lot and he got out. “What kind of pizza do you want? You can pick.” He asked while they walked in, enjoying the familiar smell of pizza while doing so. He hadn’t eaten an actual meal while looking for Marley, aside from when Ryan brought him food, so this was going to be a nice change.

Marley scanned the menu and shrugged. She knew she should eat, but her nerves about going back to Riverdale completely overwhelmed any appetite she might have had. “Something with chicken?” It was more of a question than a suggestion or a choice, but she was trying. She thanked whatever higher power there might have been that the restaurant was fairly empty, she didn’t know if she would have been able to handle a crowd.

He looked over the menu himself and nodded, ordering something with chicken, because even her phrasing it as a question was better than not saying anything at all. "I'm sorry," he blurted out, "I did start to make a lot of you running away about me, which was stupid and unfair because you were dealing with shit I can't even pretend to imagine and understand." Aaron was usually okay with just moving past hard conversations involving emotions, but he just didn't seem to be able to wait to blurt out an apology to her.

Marley breathed out a sigh, really not wanting to cry right there in a stupid pizza joint in Greendale. She really didn't want to go back to her fight with Aaron the previous night. Not after yelling at him again just not that long ago. Normally, she didn't regret much of what she said, she was careful. But she had been cruel to Aaron and he hadn't deserved it. "No," she shook her head and moved closer. "You didn't do that. You weren't the person who was unfair. I was." She blinked back tears, successfully for the first time in a while. She took a breath before continuing. "You were scared, and I understand that. I should have handled everything better and the fact that you're not mad .... That's more than I deserve."

Aaron listened to her response, he did still think he was unfair yesterday, but he wasn’t looking to argue with her right now. “I was mad that you thought no one needed you. But when I tried thinking about what I’d do if I went through that, I’d probably run away too. Though I mean, I ran away because Burt got a busier job, clearly I’m not the best at deciding when to run.” As usual, a joke to negate the emotional and real words he was saying before. It helped him a bunch to avoid breaking down all of the time.

Marley still didn’t think anyone needed her but now was not the time to bring that up. She cracked a small smile at Aaron’s comment. Comparing something he did as a child to what she had done just recently was a little different but she appreciated the effort. “Guess we’re more alike than either of us thought, huh?” She continued, looking at him.

For the first time since he’d arrived she really looked at him. He had bags under his eyes and just looked worm out. She did her absolute best not to let the guilt take over, but it wasn’t easy. All she could do now was make sure he started sleeping and go from there.

He was glad to see a smile from her, even if it was small, it was better than how upset she’d been. “Seems so, pretty girl.” Aaron looked away from her after a moment, knowing he probably looked pretty shitty and not really wanting to make her feel worse than she did. And just as a general rule for him, he tried to avoid anything that would make people worry about him.

When their order came, he started eating pretty quickly, not that it was unusual for him, but it was like he was suddenly realizing how hungry he’s been and now it was like it was coming all at once.

When Aaron looked away, Marley averted her eyes, afraid of making him uncomfortable and crossing a line.

As Aaron scarfed down his food she grabbed a slice and ate it slowly, happy to leave as much for Aaron as he wanted. "When was the last time you ate?" She asked as she watched him eat. The idea of someone, especially Aaron, not taking good enough care of themselves on account of her selfish actions was a burden that she knew she had to bear right now.

Aaron paused mid-bite to think about the question, because if she was really meaning actual food, it’s been a bit. “This morning. I had some chips before heading out here, wasn’t in the mood for breakfast.” He kept eating after saying that, though he was doing his best to remember to leave some for Marley. “Don’t worry about it, I’ve been taking care of myself.” That was a lie, and he’s sure it was an obvious one, but they didn’t need to focus on him.

"Chips aren't food, not really," Marley replied, rolling her eyes. Not that she was really one to talk, she had been eating maybe one meal, of take out, a day since she'd taken off. It was getting clear to her that they were both a bit of a mess. Out of fear he'd try and turn the conversation about food on her, she decided to drop it as she grabbed another piece, stomach starting to settle.

"So..." Marley said after a second. "What have I missed?" It felt weird coming out of her mouth, awkward. She didn't know if she actually cared, but she didn't know what else to say to fill the silence.

He was about to say something back, ask her how much of the food she was getting delivered was really food. But before he could even open his mouth, she was eating more and asking what she missed. Which was definitely a hard question to answer. He didn’t want to mention Frank, not after everything.

“Besides Kurt coming back and people thinking I killed Blaine? Not that much.” More people thought he killed Marley than Blaine, but he didn’t mention that. Making her feel like shit was the opposite of what he wanted. “Santana came back to town too, so there’s that.”

Marley nodded along, slowly eating her pizza. She felt so disconnected, numb from the town still. She had no idea what she was going to be walking back into, and she wasn't ready. She had a sinking feeling in her gut that her welcome wouldn't be all that welcoming. The news about her father had to be out now and she was terrified of any sort of backlash she, and her sister would receive, for who knows how long.

She finished her second slice and left the last piece for Aaron, not wanting to overdo it. She started pulling at her bandage on her hand, under the table, hoping Aaron wouldn't notice. It was only a matter of time before they'd be leaving.

Aaron ate the last piece once it was clear that Marley wasn’t going to eat it. “I do want to tell you, since the whole ‘I love you’ thing is out there now, not that it matters that much but I’m sure it’ll come up from someone at some point as another ‘Aaron’s awful and you should stay away from him’ thing,” Aaron stopped for a moment because he realized he was rambling a bit more than necessary for something that really didn’t matter that much. “I broke my “no more sleeping around” rule and slept with Jake.” He didn’t want to mention that it was on her birthday and he kicked him out of his house once Millie texted him but if it came up, he won’t lie to her. He’s done doing that.

Marley had no idea where Aaron was going when he spoke. He was rambling and while she related, she wanted him to get to the point. That was, until he did get to the point. “Oh,” she answered, kicking herself for a dumb response. She quickly tried to recover. “It’s fine. I kind of dropped off the face of the Earth, right? Plus it’s not like I have a claim. We’ve gone over that. You’re a free person who makes his own choices.” Marley didn’t know what was worse, her own rambling now, or how she was feeling.

This was worse than Sebastian. This was worse than Blaine. This was worse because she caused it. She left. How could she even be mad about it? There was an easy answer, she couldn’t be. And she wasn’t. Hurt, sure, but not mad.

He bit down on his lip, because it was before she dropped off the face of the Earth and though it would be easier to just go along with it and pretend it was because he was lonely from her being gone or whatever, he shook his head a bit. “It was before you ran.” It almost felt like his voice was quieter, because he was now feeling really bad about it. This was different from when he told her about Sebastian, the timing was worse, they both knew she loved him, honestly if she wasn’t at least a bit pissed at him, he’d be very surprised, because if their positions were switched, Aaron couldn’t guarantee that he wouldn’t be at least a little mad.

Marley blinked. It was before? And she was pretty positive it wasn’t when she was in the hospital, he’d only left when it was for therapy and he couldn’t have lied about that. She really hoped not. And before that she’d been with him most nights ... minus one.

She plastered a smile on her face, probably the worst fake smile she’d ever worn. It couldn’t even be considered a trademarked one. She nodded and began wiping her hands in an effort to get out of this stupid pizza place.

Aaron loved her. He’d said that and against her better judgement, or at least it felt like that right now, she believed him. She loved him. But it didn’t seem to matter or be enough, no matter what either of them did, they seemed to hurt each other. Continuously. Maybe... She stopped herself. She didn’t want to think about the possibility that they should give whatever they had up. She shook her head softly, as if to physically rid the thought from her head.

“We should go,” she remarked, looking at Aaron. Maybe, just maybe, they could avoid talking about this ever again.

Aaron wasn't usually very good at picking up on clues, but he was getting better at picking up on Marley clues. Especially when it was that fake, "I'm sorry," was all he could say for a moment. Though it didn't feel like that was enough, though what could be enough when he had sex with his high school hookup on her birthday while she was having the worst family dinner ever?

But at her comment on going, he nodded and paid for the pizza. He knew he wouldn't sleep around anymore, not when he'd told her that he loves her. That's so much worse than when he was just telling other people he likes her, even if that was still shitty, at least she didn't know then. That made him feel better.

He got back to the car and slipped into the driver's seat, "I'll make sure to make some space in my room for you, don't want you drowning in the mess that is my bedroom." There was a moment he considered that Marley wouldn't want to stay with him after his admission, but he tried to get that thought of his head. That's what those anonymous assholes would tell him, not what he should tell himself, especially right now.

Marley nodded when Aaron apologized, not trusting herself to speak. She followed him out to the car silently, not knowing what even could be said at this point. Once he finally broke the silence she nodded again. “Okay,” she agreed. Sure, his room was messy but she hadn’t exactly minded before but if that made him feel better about her invading his space, she’d let him have it.

She was tempted to ask Aaron why he chose to sleep with Jake, she really was. But she was terrified of most, if not all, of the possible answers he could give her. She opened her mouth to speak a couple times before talking herself out of it.

Aaron wanted to find a way to break the silence that wasn't a dumb comment or something. But he had nothing, he could see out of the corner of his eye that Marley kept opening and closing her mouth and he wished he could have known what was going on in her head. "If you want to say something, you can say it, y'know." He was expecting it to be a question or an upset comment about what all he'd told her, or maybe a question about Frank or Charlie. Or even a concern about going back. Honestly, there could be so many possibilities right now, so many things seemed to be up in the air.

Marley turned to look at Aaron when he spoke. Of course he could tell what she was battling, he seemed to be able to read her as well as Charlie ... or Blaine could. She took a breath, trying to calm her nerves before she spoke. “Why?” She questioned him. “I’m just confused.” Confused might be true, but there were other words she was definitely avoiding a few different choice words.

That was a very good question, one that he wasn’t entirely sure he knew how to answer. He knew the real reason he slept with Jake, the guy was his former kryptonite. His first guy, his regular fuck buddy, his stupid high school crush. “I haven’t been known to say ‘no’ to Jake Puckerman.” Aaron turned his head to look at her for a second before putting his eyes back on the road, “He was the first guy I slept with, my main hookup back in high school. Then he left after graduation and I thought he’d never come back. But, he did, and he was convincing enough that I said yes.”

Marley had to take a moment to take all that in. Of course there was someone back in town that Aaron couldn’t say no to, that was just lovely. Maybe this was it. And as much as she’d nearly been begging him to forgetting about her and whatever they had, this dug deep. Whatever Aaron had with Jake went back since long before they’d met or even started ... hanging out. “So what now?” She asked to her own surprise. Maybe this was a good thing.

“What now?” Aaron asked, wanting to make sure he heard right. “I take you to my place and tell no one where you are until you’re ready.” He tapped on the steering wheel, realizing that’s probably not what she was talking about. “If you mean about us, I don’t know. Up to you. You love me, I love you, usually people that love each other date but I know we’ve both had a lot of shit thrown at us recently.” Date, what a weird word for him. Seemed so...real and official. “But either way, I’m not going to sleep with him again. Or anyone, for that matter. Clearly every time I sleep with someone else while having feelings about you, bad shit happens.” Though he was talking about Sebastian liking him and Marley getting hurt while he was with Jake, Blaine’s words went through his head again and he had to grip the steering wheel tighter to snap himself out of it and so he wouldn’t lose control. “Ball’s in your court as long as you want it to be, pretty girl.”

Marley couldn’t help but laugh, even if it was quietly, at Aaron’s slight obliviousness. He did catch on to what she meant after a moment and she nodded. What he was saying was true and it’s not like they hadn’t entirely not been dating, just with no official title. The reassurance that he wouldn’t sleep with Jake, or anyone again was something she knew she’d wanted to hear but wasn’t ready to admit it. “So ... we’re going to have to stop denying it every time I get called your girlfriend and vice versa?” Marley played out, almost as if she was trying out the words for herself.

She had no idea what she was doing here and it was pretty clear to see that Aaron didn’t either. It was the blind leading the blind but, maybe it would work in their favour. Nothing about them had ever been exactly conventional, Marley knew this, so why should it all of a sudden be perfect? He was here and she was here too, albeit completely reluctantly.

They would, and Aaron didn't seem to hate the sound of that. "Yep. Next time someone says something about you I get to say 'shut up that's my girlfriend'." Saying it out loud was also a little strange, because the closest he'd come to using relationship terms with someone was when he was joking about it with Jackson or Sebastian. But even just saying it in regards to Marley felt so much more real. And while it was a little scary, it seemed like it wasn't as bad as he thought it'd be.

"Does that I mean I get discounted or even better, free, onion rings from Pop's?" He grinned at her, "Because if so, I would've told you how I felt a long time ago." Another joke, because joking was easier to do in an emotion heavy conversation like this. At least for him.

Girlfriend. He’d actually said it. The same Aaron Hummel who had spent so long insisting he didn’t do feelings had just openly called her his girlfriend. Despite every negative emotion still clawing at her, she turned red and ducked her head when he’d said it. At the mention of onion rings she looked over at him and cocked an eyebrow. “Really?” She asked, amusement in her tone. “You’re the reason we’re afloat,” well that wasn’t true but it was funny. “With all the onion rings you get and you want me to give you more free onion rings? You get enough.”

He laughed, glad this ride home was going significantly better than the ride to the pizza place. "Come on, I deserve some boyfriend privileges." Okay, calling himself her boyfriend was a lot weirder than calling her his girlfriend, "How about once a month I get free onion rings? Does that work?" Honestly, Aaron didn't care if she agreed, because like she said, he gets enough.

Marley couldn’t believe him, well, she could but that wasn’t the point. She shook her head. “No, Aaron,” nothing more than you already get.” She didn’t even know when she’d even work next. She hadn’t talked to her mom since the day she’d left, and she still had the cast and her ribs were still healing. Thinking about her mom brought her down from her momentary high. They were getting close to Aaron’s and everything was getting familiar.

Aaron sighed dramatically but nodded, "Fine, guess I'll just have to deal with paying for my food." He bit his lip while they drove back into town, hoping Marley was still okay but not wanting to put too much attention on her and make her uncomfortable by looking. They soon pulled up to his apartment and after parking, he got out, he'd barely been home himself since she went missing so it was going to feel strange for both of them. He unlocked the door and opened it quickly so no one would see Marley and know she's here. "Here we go, home sweet home."

Marley rolled her eyes at Aaron's dramatics. When they got to Aaron's apartment Marley could feel her heart begin to race. Sure, she'd agreed to this but actually being here felt ... scary. She followed Aaron in quickly, not wanting to catch any attention. When they were safely confined inside she took in her surroundings. Aaron's apartment was familiar, comforting even. She kicked off her shoes and found her way to the couch. She looked over at Aaron and tried giving him another smile, hoping this one was more convincing than the last she'd tried to fake. "Thanks, Aaron. For letting me stay here for a bit."

He took his own shoes off and smiled back at her, shaking his head a little at the thanks, shrugging it off. "Stay as long as you want. Obviously having you here helps me sleep better, and it's not like you weren't here a lot of the time anyways," Aaron said. "Besides, I dragged you out of Greendale, least I could do is let you stay here." He walked over to sit on the couch with her, still being sure to give her space if needed.

Marley quickly glanced at her cast as she scooted a little closer to Aaron. "You say I help you sleep better, but ... with this thing ... what if I hit you?" She was honestly concerned, she'd bonked her own head a couple times, nothing that had really left a mark, but she figured it could be different when sharing a bed with someone else.

Focusing on her cast was easier than focusing on the fact that she was back and her phone was still off. She knew she should be phoning, or at least texting people she was safe, she should have been doing that all along, but now it was especially evident.

Though he wasn’t going to say anything, he was glad she scooted closer, it was really nice to have her here. At her comment, Aaron shrugged, “Then you hit me, big deal.” He wasn’t that worried, because Marley had been helping him sleep better so he was going to take whatever came with it. “The nightmares haven’t been as bad anyways, I’m sure with some melatonin in my system and a beautiful girlfriend by my side, I’ll be asleep all night.” He was trying to make himself get used to the ‘boyfriend/girlfriend’ title by saying it a lot, probably more than necessary, but it was sounding better on his tongue each time.

Marley raised a brow at Aaron. “You’ve obviously never been hit with a cast before. It hurts,” she warned him.

Marley didn’t know if she entirely believed him when he said the nightmares hadn’t been as bad. Her own nightmares of everything that had happened had been awful and Aaron’s hadn’t been great the last time she remembered. All that being said, she didn’t challenge him, and not just because he’d used the word girlfriend again.

“Well don’t complain if I accidentally give my boyfriend a black eye.”

Another shrug, because he hadn't been hit with a cast before, but he didn't think it could really be that bad. "I'm a tough guy, I'm sure being hit with a cast while we're sleeping isn't going to hurt me that much." He grinned a little at the boyfriend part and nodded, "No complaining, if anyone asks, I'll tell them I got in a fight." He leaned in a bit and gave her a gentle kiss on the forehead, being sure to be careful of her arm before he shifted back on the couch.

"Uh huh, a fight," Marley grinned, rolling her eyes as she maneuvered her body so she was more leaning on Aaron than the couch. "You know, with your track record, people would probably believe that lie." She knew this probably wasn't the best way to let Aaron clean up his room like he had insisted he was going to, but she was more comfortable than she'd been since before her birthday.

He let her lean on him, the thought of cleaning up his room for her being completely pushed out of his mind now. "Exactly. It's foolproof, no one will suspect that I actually got hit in the face by your cast." She definitely had a point with that, his track record was not the best. "But you'd have to be nice to me if you give me a black eye with that thing, it's in the rulebook."

"Is that so?" Marley challenged. She didn't understand why this was so easy, why after so long spending time without him, without anyone, that this was easy. Sure, she hadn't wanted to come here but she was here now and she couldn't exactly regret her decision. "I guess I'll just have to be extra careful that I don't hit you."

Aaron nodded, “Mhm, one of the first few rules in the handbook, even.” He laughed lightly, “Don’t think you can handle being that nice to me? I’m crushed. I’m a delight to get along with, everyone loves me,” he said.

Marley rolled her eyes. Of course she was never purposefully nice to Aaron. After a few moments she sat up and turned towards Aaron. Despite that she'd only woken a few hours earlier, she could feel the exhaustion catching up to her. She glanced down slightly, hair falling in her face, before looking back up at him. "I think I should try and sleep soon," Marley said quietly. "I didn't sleep much at all last night ... or much at all since ... Aladdin ..."

He could relate to that, even if it hurt to hear that she was having a lot of sleeping problems too, “Sleep’s a bitch, let’s hope it gets better for you soon.” Aaron moved to get off of the couch and held out his hand for her to take. “I guess I’ll have to focus on cleaning up tomorrow, but my bed is clear enough for you to sleep.” He wasn’t sure if she wanted him to stay with her while she slept, but he wouldn’t mind catching some Z’s himself.

Marley nodded as she laced her fingers through his. Sleep was definitely a bitch, especially lately. From the looks of it Aaron probably hadn’t been sleeping much more than she had. “Enough room for both of us, or are you going to have to go clean up now?” She’d never slept in his bed alone before and there was no way she was about to start now. She’d rather camp out on his couch.

He had already forgotten that he said he’d do that, but he shook his head, “I can do it after, the bed’s clean anyways. I’m sure I can spare some time to catch up on my own sleep,” he was sure he needed it anyways “Alright, let’s get you to bed. We gotta sleep, I can make us some food when we get up if we’re hungry.” Aaron started walking with her to the bedroom, which was his usual kind of mess but at least the bed was clear like he said.

When they got to the bedroom Marley easily slid into what she had already begun thinking of as "her" side of his bed. She'd spent so many nights there, not so much recently, but leading up to Aaron's attack and after before the disastrous birthday dinner. For a split second she caught herself wondering if this is where Aaron had spent the time with Jake but she pushed it from her head, it didn't matter anymore.

When he was beside her, she curled up against his body like she usually did, soaking up the warmth he radiated. This didn't feel real. Being here, after being away from everyone for so long didn't feel like it was happening. Ever since her birthday her life had drastically changed and she had no idea how to cope with it, even if the dilemma in the current moment was only finding a comfortable way to lay on the bed with her stupid cast.

Marley had so many more questions about things she'd missed. Was Blaine still locked up? Was Bethany okay? How was Charlie? Did Aaron think people would forgive her? One, for dropping off the face of the Earth, and two, for everything her father at done.

Before she got herself in a downward spiral of overthinking she turned slightly so she could look at Aaron. "I love you," she said just loud enough for him to hear. She wasn't sure if she'd said it yet, not since everything and he needed to know, just to be sure.

After stripping off his shirt and taking some melatonin, he climbed into bed next to her and put his arms around her. Having this again felt amazing, even if it was going to be hard to pretend that he didn't know where she was until Marley was okay with telling people, especially to Charlie and Bethany, but he'd have to manage.

Hearing her say that she loved him, in person, and not just over text, made Aaron grin. "I love you too," he responded, kissing her head softly before closing his eyes.

Marley pressed a kiss to Aaron's cheek after a second and rolled back onto her side, finally finding a comfortable-ish position, despite her cast. She'd have to worry about making her grand entrance back into Riverdale tomorrow. Trying to fall asleep, and hopefully not giving Aaron a black eye was her only priority right now. Well, that and just generally hoping the nightmares wouldn't be so bad, for either of them.

As she closed her eyes sleep eventually took over and she was grateful.

#para #aaron #charlie #blaine #bethany #alejandro #sebastian #rachel #//no *jake* is not getting a fkin tag #nathan #jackson #darius #santana #kurt #tw violence #tw death #tw semi-suicidal thoughts #//yes it's finally fucking finished

2 notes · View notes