#anyway‚ happy 10 years since the first episode got aired

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

My weekly roundup CW 17

I try to write down my thoughts after watching stuff to create a little weekly ranking in relation to the previous week on my, most of the times, quiet sundays (and because I love lists!). These are just my personal opinions and preferences.

And yes, this may contain spoilers!

→ 1. The Eighth Sense (9+10/10 Final)

Phew. How should I sum up my feelings about it? Korea has a knack for good stories, for me, anyway. And this story is definitely one of my favorites and one of the best I've seen so far. And you can tell it's leaning more towards western television. You can notice the Skam notation and also a bit of the Young Royals setting. But what about the last episodes? I knew there was going to be a happy ending because I was spoilered thanks to MDL, since the movie has already aired in Korea. Nonetheless, for me the journey is the destination, I also like to spoil myself on purpose sometimes. Because while I knew it would end well, I didn't know what the journey would be like. And the way was so beautiful! JaeWon is slowly realizing that his life belongs to him and he won't be better off if he excludes JiHyun from it. He worries so much about not hurting others, about what he thinks is good for others, without looking at what the others might want. He hurts JiHyun much more by avoiding him and excluding him from his life, and he's starting to realize that. And yes, in the end they meet again and this reunion climaxes in such an unbelievably great kiss and a night where both of them can hardly sleep because they can't stop looking at each other and finally enjoying each other's closeness. And JaeWon is completely absorbed in the role of "it's now or never, you only live once and screw everyone else". He's with JiHyun and he doesn't give a shit who knows it all then. And the message of it all: they don't know if they'll make it and stay together, but that doesn't stop them from trying anyway, giving themselves a chance and believing in something positive. It's worth allowing some happiness and love in your life. I am thrilled by this series. The only thing that bothered me a bit was the "reconciliation" with EunJi and TaeHyung.

↑ 2. My Story (3/10)

I was so looking forward to the next episode. Not necessarily because of the good acting of the main couple or their chemistry, but because of Zeke and Fifth! I got a really bad second-couple-syndrome! They're just so cute together, even though I really didn't need the close-ups of their feet! But Fifth was jealous! Ahhhh! And makes no bones about finding men attractive. What's going on with the main couple? I don't know. They briefly didn't interest me after the kissing-after-puking moment…that wasn't romantic that was gross!

Yes, I might be lowkey obsessed with them...

☼ 3. Happy Merry Ending (1+2/8)

Korea is coming up big this year with plots that deal with social anxiety and depression. I'm curious to see how this will be implemented here. In the first episode, we definitely learned that SeungJun has trauma and is medicated in that regard. It seems to be an important, central theme. Especially as a wedding singer who only dares to perform wearing sunglasses because he's afraid of the looks of the audience. And in return, we have JaeHyun who can fit in well with groups and new environments. I love JaeHyun already! He's so obviously hit hard with SeungJun and I love it! He is so direct and wants to spend time with him. Oh love at first sight! Love it!

☼ 4. La Pluie (1/12)

La Pluie surprised me. I didn't think the story would pick me up like that in the first episode. Yes, the concept of going deaf when it rains and only being able to hear your soulmate's voice (even if he's not present but telepathic) takes some getting used to, but I honestly found it quite cute. And yes, love at first sight is also a little favorite of mine. So Tai goes deaf but can hear his soulmate's voice in his head when it rains. However, he has mostly refused to answer him so far because he doesn't believe in soulmates or love. After all, his parents, who were also supposed to be soulmates, divorced each other. That changed his view of love. But his first encounter with the person behind the voice in his head perhaps showed him, what he might miss, if he doesn't reach out already. And as a second couple, we have an enemies-to-lovers story! I am excited!

↓ 5. Our Dining Table (4/10)

Yutaka's brother is just an asshole. But he couldn't help it as a child/teenager, but the parents could have said something. It's so easy to say you're part of the family now and then just ignore when the son bullies the adopted son like that. I want to box him and the parents. And Minoru wants to know so much more about Yutaka. He's so on his way to totally falling in love with Yutaka and his sensitive nature. And he's so sweet and insecure about it. I'm happy if Yutaka can open up to him a little bit.

↓ 6. A Boss And A Babe (9/12)

Yeah, what can I say. Gun is an idiot if he really thinks Cher betrayed him like that. And then he doesn't talk to him right away but gives him the cold shoulder first. Uncool, boss! And the friends realize that Cher was apparently a bit more serious with the boss after all. Even though they're there for him, I'm still pissed about last week. The sleepover was really nice though. Even friendships are not without drama. But it all works out in the end. Gun breaks Cher's Gameboy, but repairs it right away because of his bad conscience. But that's it for the drama, at least between Cher and Gun, right?

↑ 7. The Promise (7/10)

Party, my man! He has really thought, if you can not, Phu, then I'll show you how it's done right! Well, the result was rather so devastating, but I love how Nan reacted! As a person who has witnessed both sides, I think Nan gave the best reaction possible. He showed Party and told him that he is important to him and is and will be his best friend. And Party can now so slowly detach himself from the feeling. It is indeed easier to do such a thing when it is spoken out. Well and Phu…I even understand him. He just has zero hopes, so why jeopardize the friendship? Even though Nan took every opportunity to touch Phu's face in the morning…You can apply sunscreen several times, come on I'll show you. Yeah, right! The two of them have to finally talk to each other. And of course Phu isn't Nan's best friend anymore, because Nan doesn't consider him a friend anyway, he just doesn't quite understand yet what Phu actually is to him. Good episode.

↓ 8. Naked Dining (3/10)

Ohhhh, Futa is jealous! You can tell already very much that the two like each other a bit much. And finally the naked dining was back! And also with the homemade food he made together with Mahori. Yes, this is a rather quiet series as well. I don't know how much drama we can expect, but so far it's a gentle sprinkling. And I'm permanently hungry by the time I'm done with the episodes…

↓ 9. Step By Step (2/12)

Hm. I don't know. I don't like Jeng? And all the colleagues just suck! And then Pat is supposed to leave the only one who is nice to him and who is on the same page with him alone, because there might be gossip? That's bullshit! So I found the second episode not quite as convincing. The friends, on the other hand, except for the slip of his friend, who met professionally with his ex, I still find great!

↓ 10. Our Skyy 2 (3+4/16)

I really wanted to like it. But shit, was it boring! It's a fireworks display of cheesy dialogue…And what kind of ring is that? Am I just too anti-romantic to find that beautiful? I mean, yes, cute, sunflower and star together, but that's too much for a ring…And I have an idea for a new drinking game: A shot every time one of the two says I love you! And finally the cringiest quotes...

"Dao, you're trusting the right person, because I no longe know how to love anyone else. You're the only one I love." "Will you eat breakfast first or eat me first?" "I am all yours, Kluen. Yours and yours only, Kluen." "Once our home is done, our parents will discuss our wedding plans." (Even though Kluen didn't ask and Dao couldn't say yes…)

→ 11. Tin Tem Jai

I took notes: Why did a series like Tin Tem Jai have to include a drug storyline? There was no resolution to the story whatsoever, except that Kana would hit Pao if he took drugs again. Problem solved…Wow! Screw Pao's problems, they'll take care of themselves! Next, I noted: Why does Tin continue to be portrayed as this little boy. That just feels wrong to me. And again, I ask myself the question, how old is Tin supposed to be? And further, you guys can just kiss like that. You don't have to wait until your birthday. The whole kissing contact just doesn't feel good. There's just too much riding on the fact that Park is so much older and more experienced than Tin. I am constantly confused and not feeling good. Luckily next epsiode will be the last one! Finally!

#weekly wrap up #weekly update #josi watching bl #sunday charts #the eighth sense #my story the series #happy merry ending #la pluie #our dining table #a boss and a babe #the promise #naked dining #step by step the series #our skyy 2 #tin tem jai #bl drama #bl series #just my opinion

[yea-baiyi]

Hi....If you don't mind, can I ask, what are your top 10 (or top 7) favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series)? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before......Thanks....

hi it’s been a while! i love getting asks from you because it lets me ramble about my favourite things, it makes me so happy so thank you!!! i hope you know how much joy you bring <3

(i’m sorry i haven’t replied to your last top 10 ask, i started the list and it got so humiliating that i’m unable to look at it again.)

anyway “top 10 media” is a broad question, so i have picked the top 10 media i love to ramble about. the kind where i could talk for hours about each one. are these objectively my favourites? maybe not. are they even good? only like half of them. but they certainly are top. enjoy!!

top 10 media of all time (not ranked):

1. tgcf (novel)

its still too early to say if this is a permanent top 10, but it has consumed my life for the better part of a year so it gets on this list. i have difficulty describing tgcf, it’s not particularly an excellent novel by many metrics, but it gives me endless satisfaction — the breadth of the story, spanning hundreds of years and a broad range of plotlines, plus the incredible depth of each moment, with sensitivity and humanity behind every hilarious-ridiculous-bombastic moment. i keep finding new things with every new chapter i annotate, even on my 4th/5th read. it’s rare that a piece of media gives me so much to think about, i’m just trying to savour the enjoyment for as long as it lasts.

2. the untamed/陈情令 (tv show)

oh man what can i say about the untamed. what can i NOT say about the untamed. the show i resisted for two years before finally being pushed into it. and i have been hurtling down the danmei rabbit hole ever since. for all that it was my intro to danmei and into the modern cdrama fandom, it really is SO MUCH just on its own. i daresay no tv show will ever be able to deliver such pure insanity juice straight to my brain ever again. deserves its spot. show of all time.

3. fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood (anime + manga)

i was a weeb for YEARS. consumed hundreds if not thousands of episodes of anime and manga. and this is the only one that stuck. obviously a masterpiece of storytelling. i revisit this constantly. i love stories that can be grim but still hopeful and endlessly sincere. also if you can’t tell i’m a huge sucker for stories where the side characters clearly have their own histories and relationships outside of what we get to see, and fmab has that for ages.

4. the legend of korra (tv show)

i cannot in good conscience say that i like this show. if you asked for my opinion, i would complain in your ear for an hour straight, minimum. (i have done this. multiple times. don’t ask me about the legend of korra.) and yet it is the piece of media i think about the most, that i have dedicated the most of my writing to, that i rewatch most often. lok aired when i was 13-17 and i grew up with it on tumblr. the people i followed and the things they talked about shaped how i interact with fandom today. maybe one day i will be able to move on, but this one has a sure spot in my top 10.

5. sense8 (tv show)

this one i can wholeheartedly recommend to any queer person trying to grow up in the world. yes, the orgies are gratuitous, the first season has some 2014 cliches, and overall who cares about the plot. but it’s such an unabashed expression of queer joy and unconditional love. there’s something so comforting in the idea that other people will volunteer to share your pain, your happiness, and your loneliness. that everyone in the world is connected by their ability to feel, to laugh, to scream, to cry, to love— you are only as alone as you let yourself be. this show carried me through so many dark times and helped me to keep believing in people. maybe i’ve outgrown my need for this show now, but i will always love sense8.

6. my ajusshi/my mister (kdrama)

is it one of the best kdramas ever made? yes. am i also incredibly biased because it’s IU? also yes. i strongly recommend it if you have the patience. this drama is slow and melancholy and washed out, its characters are weary and cynical and not always kind to each other. but that is precisely the point, because the drama dusts off their dull, exhausted lives and finds within them something worth living for. sometimes it’s enough to know that you have the power to make someone else’s life better. you might have lost the love of your life, but you have a spare mattress in your bedroom for a scared, lonely girl to sleep on. you might have lost your marriage, but you have enough money to pay for an old woman’s funeral. your career might be going nowhere, but you can be the cheerleader and inspiration for a silly woman that loves you. you might be a gang of sad, broke, middle-aged failures, but you can all walk a young woman home together and make her night a little less dark. my ajusshi is not an easy drama to watch, but similar to sense8, it’s one that gives me hope.

7. the k2 (kdrama)

firmly convinced that tumblr is sleeping on this drama. it is so absolutely batshit feral unhinged. let women be a mess!!! let women be so wrong!!! let women scheme and threaten and fight and manipulate, while the man looks on with protective anxiety and/or dead-eyed absolute competency. let a woman run barefoot through the streets of spain in a nightgown, tears streaming down her face. let a woman past her prime be psychosexually obsessed with her stepdaughter’s bodyguard whom she is locked in a blackmail revenge plot with. let him lead her at gunpoint into a car so he can escape the standoff, only for it to become a car chase with her enemies, and for him to flip the vehicle over. let him walk back into the burning car to carry her out.

8. man of steel (movie)

not gonna lie haven’t rewatched those one in a while! but officially my #1 favourite movie if anyone asks. i have moved on from capeshit but this movie still has everything i love: a world that breathes, people that live in it, and a clear message of hope despite how bleak things might seem.

9. rogue one (movie)

i mean. i mean. it says something that i was working on my (planned out, the story exists fully formed in my head) tgcf rogue one au when i opened up my writing notes and found that at some point last year i had written an entire mdzs rogue one au. brilliant. unparalleled. so blessed that this movie got to exist in between the endless cash grabs that are the other movies. as a star wars fan since age 13, i can say with full assurance this is the only star war that matters actually.

10. the infernal devices (novel series)

not sure if i’ve mentioned this series on this blog before, but to this day it’s one of my favourite YA series. yes it is your standard cliche fantasy series but it has will herondale, the best payoff to the typical angsty brooding male lead to ever exist. writers try to justify brooding characters like “they have valid reasons to be that way, deep down they’re really loving blah blah” but this series takes that and delivers. because the moment will is free from the legitimate reason he was acting that way, he is bursting at the seams to show his love. he runs to the girl he loves and tells her he loves her. he tells the woman who raised him that she’s awesome. he spends the rest of his life so, so incandescently happy, simply because he gets to love the people he loves. also the ending of the second book is possibly one of the wildest cliffhangers for a love triangle ever. i clearly love to have an Experience while consuming a piece of media.

(if you’ve read til here, thank you for reading and letting me ramble some of the words that go through my brain endlessly. if you’ve ever consumed and enjoyed any of the things i’ve mentioned, please feel absolutely welcome to message or dm me, i am dead serious about being able to talk about these for hours. in fact i would love to. please)

#asks #tgcf #cql #faves #lok #rambling #top 10 media of all time is so broad so i just picked. what do i WANT to write about #top 10 media that just lives rent free in my mind #there are things i love more and better but in terms of #does it give me brain chemicals. #do i cradle thoughts of these characters in my head like a baby #what gives me the brain chemicals #this took so long to write and i am so sleep deprived so i’m sorry if it is very incoherent #ily

[dramashii]

Finally had the time to sit with my feelings for the first episode of the second season of Alchemy of Souls: Light and Shadow. I was really excited for this especially considering how the first season finished. Truthfully, although only 4 months have passed since the last episode aired, I sort of forgot already a lot of things especially about the magic system: tansu, chisu etc. 

Anyways, I watched the first episode last night and I’m kind of apprehensive as to how this is going to go. One of my major criticism of the first season was how nothing much plot-heavy things happened. There were so many filler episodes which could have been resolved if the characters just sat and talked. I wished they explored more of the magical aspects of the show: more fight scenes with swords basically. Don’t get me wrong, I liked the first season but I just expected more.

This is why I’m not sure how this second season is going to go. I know it’s still premature to judge the whole show in general since only a single episode has been out. But I feel like we’re just going in circles. Considering how this is going to be only 10 eps, I’m expecting this is going to be jam-packed. But it sorts of opened the same way as the previous season but with the roles reversed. Rather than the female lead (Mu Deok in the previous season) making use of Jang Uk so she can get her powers back, this season it’s going to be Jang Uk who’s going to be taking advantage of the female lead (Naksu). I still don’t understand how the change of the female lead’s face is going to be important here (1 ep down, 9 to go). I also hope they don’t dragged the love triangle so much.

I also have to say that I like this darker version of Jang Uk. I like Lee Jae Wook’s comedic timing in the first season, but in my opinion,  he suits better darker characters. When he’s brooding, he looks 10x better. So, I think this is my favorite change of the show so far. 

Also, Go Yoon Jung is so pretty. Her character is bright here although the circumstances of her life has been quite difficult for the last 3 years. I miss her bad ass self though, the one that got me whipped in the first episode of the first season. I want to see strong Naksu and strong Jang Uk fight. That would be really interesting. It seems so far that Naksu in this season does not have her strong powers. Curious to see how the writers are going to convince the audience about this pairing. When it was announce that Jung So Min wasn’t going to be in the second season, I was unsure as to how this is going to go. I hope there will be a clear explanation in the end as to why she had to change faces. 

I’m really curious as to how the aftermath of the event 3 years ago played out. It feels like a lot has changed, not only for the main leads but also for the side characters. Jin Mu is still in the palace though?? I don’t get this part. How is this man walking free? I hope he dies in the end. 

Also, considering how Naksu is still remembered by so many people, I think it wouldn’t take long for people of Daeho to figure out that the “eldest” Jin daughter and the assassin Naksu, look the same. I’m surprised though that Jang Uk hasn’t been able to identify the similarities. I know he has amnesia but like  He doesn’t have amnesia, but wouldn’t he be at least curious of the woman who put a sword to his chest?

I hope the second season will answer all the questions that weren’t answered in the first one. Something tells me this isn’t going to have a happy ending. Not because it was written by the Hong sisters who are notorious for their sad endings for their fantasy dramas but because the situations of the leads are so dire. It's hard to imagine a happy ever after.

#alchemy of souls season 2: Light and Shadow #alchemy of souls #kdrama

[feuqueerfire]

Our Skyy 2 Live Blogging

They really filmed the episodes for this in parallel and it was fun and chaotic to get all the spoilers for them. This is one my GMMTV's 2023 most anticipated shows, so I'm very excited.

My most anticipated are Bad Buddy, My School President, and The Eclipse. Then, NLMG > 1000 Stars = SIMM > Vice Versa and I don't plan on watching ABAAB. Bad Buddy was my most anticipated when the announcement happened because it's my favourite BL and I miss Pat and Pran so much T.T but since then, My School President has aired and I care about seeing both the characters and actors in that (NobiGun I'm gonna scream for 80 years); I don't care about ONN as a ship for Bad Buddy and I don't really care about seeing more of The Eclipse but rather am mostly excited for KhaoFirst. So now it's MSP > BBS > Eclipse

Never Let Me Go Apr 19, 22, 23

The actual show left me with a meh feeling but I really liked this historical time travel soulmates nonsense. It was cute and fun and I'm happy to have seen Nueng and Palm one more time. Also the Ep 2 part 1 beach kiss from the present time took me by surprise but it was great. Also think it's funny that we traded 1 Dangerous Romance couple in NLMG (Perth/Chimon) for another (Marc/Pawin).

I do like Pond/Phuwin and wonder if they'll get another show next year or not.

Rating: 6.5/10 - same as NLMG

Star In My Mind

I don't care about or remember this show but I like JoongDunk enough and idk, I'm in the mood for cuteness

Ep 1 (Apr 26): they're soo cute and also even though it initially seems like Kluen's always scheming to or pushing for more physical affection from Nuea, Daonuea's the same way with the kissing in part 2 end and part 3 beginning. Daonuea's just a schemer in general (with Maitee and Sean for example) and I like that

Ep 2 (Apr 27): So much more boring rip it's like how Kluen and Nuea got boring in the actual SIMM show once they got together. also sad that we didn't even get Nay/Sean but still had to abandon Sean/Maitee for them rip.

Rating: 5.5/10 - slightly lower than SIMM

The Eclipse - May 5

It's my first week at work + my laptop charger stopped working, so I didn't watch this during release but am watching on Friday.

Ep 1: My beloved beautiful KhaoFirst back on screen, hello. I'm actually a big lover of established relationships + conflicts in such a relationship, so I like this in theory but I feel like I couldn't quite understand what was going on or what was making them be so irritated at each other and also the characters esp Ayan were a bit ? to me if we compare them to their The Eclipse selves; I think a longer show where we could see patterns of behaviour would've been so good if this was a longer series. Also they're sooo cute in part 4 ahh Ayan trying to make up with sulking Akk and Akk just being like ">:( sometimes you make me feel so good and other times you're horrible"

Ep 2: ahh friendship is magic Akk-Wat-Kan conversation with them wholeheartedly supporting Wat without glorifying his decision - even if his directorial dreams fail, they'll still support him T.T

I got spoiled since ep 1 aired that Aye was planning a surprise while pretending to forget Akk's birthday and yeah, it's dumb to make somebody sad for 2 weeks for a surprise smh also since his friends knew, they should've shaken some sense into him .

Anyway, very horny ending, nice.

Overall: They have some very good things I love (established relationships going through some problems or navigating things, lovely friendships and supportive friends, lots of pecks and cute kisses) with some things that will forever annoy me (I think this sort of "surprise" is bad and mean agh) and also Ayan didn't quite feel like The Eclipse Ayan. The parts that were good made me smile though, I like KhaoFirst a lot.

Tangentially related but now I'm wishing KhaoFirst are in a slightly serious drama about an established couple going through a rocky period - but not like tooooo dramatic or with big consequences like divorce or custody battles or anything. more like alan/wen where they still love each other but keep hurting each other (not via cheating though) and make it back together by the end.

Rating: 6/10 - significantly lower than The Eclipse

Vice Versa - May 10

I get why people keep up with weekly shows, I haven't been able to binge any show since I started work/internship but coming home to watch an episode is fun and doable. But I think this pretty much only works because it's a 2-episode arc that's gonna end the same week rather than watch 1 ep and think abt it the whole week.

Ep 1: I didn't really care about Vice Versa or Puen/Talay or JimmeySea but this episode was fairly cute, good for watching while somewhat paying attention but not really analyzing or thinking. I also liked that the kid shows up like 2/3 of the way in and we get some o the couple being coupley before that

Ep 2: Boring and idc and also slightly annoying with the secret thing

I'm so excited for next week MSPxOurSkyy, idc if people are sad it's the same scenes and not college Tinn/Gun. i’m forever a lover of flipping dynamics + we get Nobigun so i’m hyped

Rating: 5.5/10 - slightly lowe than VV

My School President

My most anticipated (beat out Bad Buddy because for that one I'm only interested in the characters but not the actors whereas I'm into both the actors and characters here)!!

OST: Love Love Love (May 16) - I smiled through the whole thing! It's It didn't beat out any of my MSP OST faves after 2 listens but that might change later who know

Ep 1 (May 17): They're just cute! Tinn was soooo into Gun knowing how to ride a bike lol. Also the switching of cute scenes among pairs was interesting too, like Tinn/Gun getting the motorbike scene and Sound/Win getting the homework scene.

they made fans guesses with TiwPor secretly dating come true and they're even scheming. that's cute even though i don't really feel any attachment toward TiwPor

Ep 2 (Ep 18): I’m watching MSP Our Skyy and if I liked SoundWin more, the “Why? do you want us to be friends?” reenactment would have done me in fr

Tinn my sparkly-eyed boy!! Gemini's eyes were so beautiful in part 2? 3? when he and Gun were lying down beside each other ah pretty boy. Also, so adorable that Tinn fell first in this universe too and he was so cute talking to his mom when Gun came to the store that first time.

Although to have the previous Our Skyy eps be full of kisses and not even have cheek kisses in this one, forget lips is like why

Overall: The MSP Our Skyy eps are just okay, i don’t think they needed to do a play by play of the original series squished into 2 episodes and they could’ve been more clever if they were set on doing the body switches. I just dont care that much though because I got 2 more hours of TinnGun and also GemFourth

Rating: 6.5/10 - lower than MSP

Bad Buddy (x ATOTS)

MY BELOVEDS!!!!!!!!! ohmnanon this ohmnanon that idcidcidc my beloved PatPran are coming back to me! as are Ink and Pa~~~~

Ep 1 (May 31)

gonna only get to watch part 1 during lunch so I debated just watching it at the end of the day but no, I'm impatient

1-1

they're so dumb, they're so cute, they're so horny, I can't handle it my head is in my hands

ink peeling shrimp for pa ah. i love their nonchalance at ruining pran and pat's moment but rubbing it in their face with their own cute feeding moments

phi pran not pat roleplay i die i cry i scream forever

1-2

they would not make me witness Pat playing porn in front of everybody, would they?

oh, they would...

ah they're so T.T now it's snow white roleplay

oh pat really would back out, the dumbass is so in love

also they're so bad at hiding this relationship, just handing out on campus in broad daylight, n wonder Prom's character saw them talking from time to time

1-3

Pran dumbass pulling the "i like it." "you mean the stars?" "i like you" line ah

kiss kiss kiss !!! what is up with these interruptions !!!!!!! i needed it to be like the eclipse, simm where it's kiss after kiss but somehow my horniests faves are getting no kisses? it won't end up like MSP no kiss right?

oh my godddddd I'm so done, why is Pran overhearing Pat's drunk ribbing at him?

well at least Pran seems to take it more as a challenge rather than getting sad about it

1-4

Pat accidentally cuddling and kissing Wai T.T but also they kissed this ep before Pat and Pran did? be fr

Pran really has a kink for embarrassing Pat in public T.T Pran's putting Pat through public humiliation kink

lmao why'd Phupa faint?

not the Pran-Phupha stare and then Pran-Tian staredown pls

next episode nowwwwwww

Ep 2 (June 1)

oh pretty long ep, like 70 mins?

1-1

lmfao Pran really getting their in the middle of Phupha and Tian's argument T.T

somehow doesn't feel weird to see Pran in this village and setting of another show. somehow he and Tian conversing just makes sense

oh Pat with his cheekiness, him getting here feels like more of a difference in the setting

ah Pat Pran i love them

Tian clocked them in 1 second

I didn't really like Phupha in the original ATOTS, let's see if I'll care about him now

not Phupha Tian arguing about who threw themself at who first T.T

2-4

these fuckers T.T running Pran around to get the other to admit they liked the other first

"following what's in the diary" ep 7 flashbacks, Pat Pran are experts at doing cute couply things without just admitting that they're both liking it and doing it

silly boys T.T playing in water soooo cute

ah fucking mosquito net phupha-tian roleplay T.T finally a kiss but why would Pran push him away T.T they kissed with ease in Bad Buddy, what is this

askldfjalskdjfakldsfj they're soooo horny "have you ever wondered how much this can withstand the shake?" adsfsadfkl but they won't even kisssssssssss

Pat's obsession with smelling Pran

1-3

ah Bad Buddy song - secret

ngl I wish this was a little less about Phupha-Tian and more about Pat-Pran since it's still their week of Our Skyy

1-4

lmfao pls not Pat and Phupha waking up shirtless beside each other also are you guys stupid really counting down to check if they have their pants on

girl what's happening

Cute and fun and I love PatPran, so I wish there was a bit more of them than there actually was. Can't believe I only watched this because I'd get to watch it weekly but instead I have to wait until next week D: Though at least it's good that we get PatPran for 1 whole week instead of just 2 days.

A Tale of Thousand Starts (x Bad Buddy)

I finished The Devil Judge on Monday and was still in that sort of mood on Tuesday and Wednesday, so I'm gonna binge both episodes from this week on Thursday - the last Our Skyy episode day.

Ep 1 (June 8)

fucking smell kink freak Pat

this ep is kinda boring ngl

these horny mfers really fucked in the tent lmfao

bro this ep is just annoying like why is everybody getting lost and both Tian and Phupha are just annoying characters this whole crossover

Mostly a boring (and repetitive - why get lost twice in the woods smh) episode except for certain Pat/Pran moments ah my beloveds

Ep 2 (June 8)

won't like i'm just skipping through the second half of part 1 bc I don't care about Phupha/Tian and I'm bored already

watched a bit more of part 2 bc they were cute enough

is that the P'Aof cameo as the solider in the play

lol Pat as Tian and Pran as Phupha cute

plssss InkPa at the back - I wish they were there a biiit more

Pa heckling them to kiss and Wai + Korn making it happen pls

wtf the WaiKorn? did they acc kiss?

yaas PatPran as PhuphaTian kiss even though we haven't got a regular PatPran good kiss except that 1 surprise one

yeahhh kiss as Pat and Pran or I kill you - oh this is the finger-sucking scene, horny bastards okay we did get a kiss

plsss my beloved Pa pee interruption scene recreated

oh, I don't give a fuck about engagements

Okay yeah sure idk Pat and Pran are great as expected but the first ep of this week was fairly boring (and mostly Pat and Pran apart) and 2nd ep was Phupha/Tian heavy (That's expected)

Rating: 6.5/10 for both weeks BBSxATOTS eps

Overall:

In the end, some were good, some were meh, some I was disappointed by but oh well. It was still fairly fun and I liked watching it weekly since I get a new story every week. NLMG = MSP = BBSxATOTS > Eclipse > SIMM = Vice Versa

Rating: 6/10

#our skyy 2 #ep by ep commentary #never let me go #bad buddy #star in my mind #the ecliipse #my school presidents

[ultrahpfan5blog]

So The Flash is finally ending after 9 seasons. While I would have liked it to get one more season so it gets 10 seasons, 9 seasons and 184 episodes is quite an achievement for any show, and especially a genre show. Second longest running superhero show after Smallville. I have watched the show since the premiere was released early before its official air date and I have loved watching it ever since, through the highs and lows. Seasons 1 and 2 are still among the best seasons of superhero tv for me. I think season 4 and season 7 have been the low points. I do think the show ran way too fast in the first couple of seasons and exhausted some of its best villains too early. It is regrettable that we never got a full version of the Rogues. I think The Flash really should be the show that gets credit for blowing up the Arrowverse. While Arrow definitely gets credit for being the originator of this universe, The Flash is what expanded it, introducing the superpower concept and then introducing the multiverse, which allowed for crossovers of the size of things like Invasion, Crisis on Earth X, Elseworlds, and COIE.

I do have a wish list of things I want in the final season, but I don't know how much of that is doable in 13 eps. Firstly, I really hope Cisco returns at least for the finale. I'm sure Tom Cavanaugh will make an appearance in some way or another. I'd love to see Melissa Benoist back, if she's willing. Obviously, if they can get Stephen Amell, then that would be awesome. I'd love to see Snart return one more time if possible. I have missed the Barry and Snart interactions. I would ideally like one more big crossover, but I think that is highly unlikely. Maybe an appearance from Ray Palmer again would be nice.

On another note, I find it hilarious that The Flash tv show is ending just before the movie will air, given the movie was originally announced just shortly after the show was launched and Stephen Amell was pretty pissed with WB about the timing of the announcement. Here we are essentially 9 years later and the movie still hasn't come out yet. I do wonder if there will be any tie in.

Anyways, still a long time before season 9 will come out. Hoping for a strong finish. I do think season 8 was significantly better than season 7 and maybe the best since season 3. So I hope they can signoff in a good way. I expect that it will end in a business as usual type of way and The Flash will be alive and still a hero, even though the show ends, though I expect it will end with Iris pregnant with Nora. We already know that Barry and Iris are happy and alive in the future. I don't anticipate them messing with that.

#the flash #arrowverse

[piningintrovert]

I'm the nonnie who asked all the BL questions what to watch where back at the end of Dec and the nonnie that said you're the best and ran away to watch more. And the gift nonnie too. 💜 My way of saying thank you for the answers and your kindness. And because I LOVE secret gifting :)

I got really lucky and turns out one of my exes who I am good friends with had a few streaming services already so I use those and Youtube, which means I don't really need to get another service but I did get gaga because they didn't have that one, and so we share that one in trade.

You mentioned looking over my shoulder to see what I was watching. So I will give you a list of all the ones I have seen so far.

The Sign (two episodes behind)

Pit Babe (3 episodes behind)

Love is in the Air (I just have to say...wowzers...a lot in this, like a lot a lot. Took me a bit to be okay with certain things but I did like it a lot, and wowzers again LOL I have watched it through twice)

Wedding Plan

Between Us (MY ABSOLUTE FAV AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH I HAVE WATCHED IT 10 TIMES THROUGH ALREADY)

Until We Meet Again

Even Sun

Bad Buddy (Thoroughly enjoyed this!)

KinnPorche

The Middleman's Love

Bed Friends

Naughty Babe

Kiseki to Me

Last Twilight

Blueming

Cutie Pie (and the second too) (Screamed when Boun and Prem showed up in episode 7 AND holy can that man (it should be obvious who) KISS *insert blushy face*

My Dear Gangster Oppa

Ai Long Nhai

Lovely Writer (two episodes to finish)

Why R U? (Finished the thai version and just started on the korean version because why not?)

(I didn't share all my thoughts on them just a few but I did enjoy all of them, even if there were parts that I didn't enjoy as much...)

So I have a full time job and have been devouring these when I am not working. And I know I still have lots more to watch from your list, and I'm excited watch them all. I have just been checking out stuff on MDL and getting distracted and pulled to ones you haven't mentioned as well. But I will finish all the ones you mentioned in your post, all the ones I have watched that you've suggested have been wonderful.

I'm most excited to finish The Sign, there's just something magical about that show. I don't know if I told you but you had reblogged a gifset of that series with an underwater dragon looking thing maybe it was a naga but it looked like a dragon and I am kind of obsessed with dragons so that is what started me looking for it and I love it, it's so well done.

Anyways, thank you. From the bottom of my heart. 💜

Sorry for the late reply, nonnie. I haven't been online in the past few weeks so I didn't see your ask until now orz

It looks like you've been quite busy since the first time we spoke 🤯 Reminds me of when I joined the fandom lol I'm glad things worked out with regards to the subscription services and that you're enjoying your binge-watching experience.

Having The Sign (and Pit Babe) on the roster was one helluva way to ring in the new year and I'm happy that you were able to watch it a bit while it was still airing. I long for more overtly queer, fantasy/supernatural media *deep sigh* but I will say that the covert/censored queer, fantasy media we DO have (The Untamed, Word Honor, Guardian, and The Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity) are top tier. Fingers crossed that we get more shows like The Sign in the future. By the way, the dragon thing was a naga which I'm sure you've figured out by now lol

Re: Love in the Air — "wowzers" is an understatement 😂 I don't know what it is, but the rewatch value on this series is SO high. I wouldn't be surprised if you end up watching it a third time lol

What did you think of Even Sun and Last Twilight? I dropped Even Sun after the first ep, but I always wanted to give it another chance because of Boun and Prem. And Last Twilight is on my list, but I've put off watching it because of the quite a few people were disappointed with the way things went towards the end.

Re: Zee's devouring kissing scenes in Cutie Pie — I agree 1000%; he is truly in a league of his own.

Again, I'm happy that you're enjoying the shows I recommended and more importantly, finding ones you like on your own 😊

As always, feel free to stop by anytime for a chat and thank you again for the gift; I really appreciate it 💜

#rae replies #nonnie #multi #recommendations

[starfire-s]

here’s a list of the best, mediocre and worst kdramas i watched in 2020

no one asked for this but it’s happening because i have thoughts (also all opinions are my own if you disagree then get well soon i guess... no i’m kidding make your own posts about it don’t hate me please) ahsjsj anyways click to read a lengthy post and if you actually read the whole thing then thank you i hope you enjoy this wild ride! 

THE BEST KDRAMAS -

mystic pop up bar - this show had everything i ask from a kdrama literally i can name it all found family (to real family), well thought out characters, a mystery plot, special effects, soft romances that were well written, a happy ending! no show in 2020 even comes close to how good this one was! the writers literally guided you throughout the whole thing so you could come up with theories and didn’t do a ‘aha! gotcha’ thing where they want to prove the audience wrong but they wanted us to be right and satisfied! the worst part about the drama is that it’s still so underrated and people just brush it off as some random fantasy show but it’s so much more than that! 1000/10

flower of evil - who doesn’t want to see lee joon gi being the son of a serial killer, living with the name of a man who is in a coma, and hiding his real identity from his wife who is a detective? this show constantly had me at the edge of my seat on a weekly basis so the emotions i went through while watching this are unparalleled! the writers also did such a good job on writing a coherent story that made sense and tied up all the plot points in the end. just a really satisfying show to watch! 10/10

where your eyes linger - i literally bought a $8 viki pass to watch this show so it should tell you everything you need to know about how i feel ahsjsj the episodes were 10 minutes long but we got a good story with well written characters who got character development in a total of 80 minutes it’s insane! honestly it’s still hard to believe this show had rookie actors because they were just so emotive that you could feel all the happiness, sadness, yearning and pining! probably one of my fave kdramas this year because of the acting that i always constantly rewatch! would recommend 10/10

crash landing on you - okay so this drama was actually released on my birthday last year and it was a time in my life when i was going through a lot so maybe it’s the comfort this show provided me through that time this is why i have such a soft spot for it? like the romance was good, it was funny, there was found family, the nk soldiers were all softies, there were strong female leads, soft male leads!!! ahh!! no other show on this list made me think about the unification of south korea and north korea irl because i wanted se ri and jeong hyeok to be together 4ever! but the only issue i had with this show was the ending they gave seung jun if they didn’t do that i’d give this show a 10/10 but just for that they get a 9/10

psycho but it’s okay - this was one of those shows where you’re literally like ‘wow everyone here needs therapy’ but this show was amazing i loved the story telling and how each episode related to children’s book/fairytales! the writers also did a good job with how carefully they talked about mental health in depth without villainising their characters but actually tried to make the audience understand why they were this way which included all the side characters too who had a well thought out story in each episode! also the dynamic between moon young, kang tae and sang tae was everything to me the actors all did an amazing job portraying their characters, it truly was a healing drama. the only thing i didn’t like about this show was the whole plastic surgery plot with the mother like that was very far fetched but it provided drama so i’ll let it slide because the rest was amazing. this show is a solid 8.5/10

18 again - another underrated gem! who would’ve thought a remake of that zac efron movie could be this good!! lee do hyun stole this show for sure the way he portrayed his character and gave heart eyes to his kids (when he’s only 25 irl was the best thing i saw this year ahsjs) i loved the family dynamics in this show, i loved how it talked about what it’s like to be young parents and how society still think it’s taboo to be divorced! it’s a show that makes you laugh and cry at the same time and that’s why everyone should watch it! however, the biggest clown thing this show did to me though was that i got sls for the first time while watching a kdrama... hwang in yeop if u’re reading this i love u and u deserved better 🤡 that aside this show was a 8/10

itaewon class - i actually didn’t watch this drama as it was airing because i thought i wouldn’t enjoy the plot but when i watched it i binged the whole thing in 2 days and my biggest regret is i didn’t watch it sooner! everyone knows i have a soft spot for park seo joon since he’s my favourite actor i’ve literally watched all his dramas like he could star in the trashiest drama out there and i’d still watch it and be like wow (looking at she was pretty 👀) this show aside from the acting had one of the best revenge plots in a kdrama! just watching a character realistically hustle his way to reach the top while fighting the corrupt man whose son killed his father was so so satisfying to watch! however, the love triangle in this show was questionable idk what they were trying to do with that but it personally annoyed me! but still i’ll give this show a 7.5/10 because i enjoyed it a lot!

do you like brahms? - kim min jae and park eun bin.. that’s all you need to know about why this is a good kdrama! i’m usually not a big fan of melodramas and everyone knows i prefer rom coms but this show was just so perfectly melo that i loved all the angst and pain we got!! also just watching two introverted people awkwardly fall in love was amazing! the characters story arcs were also handled pretty well with song ah finally learning to speak up for herself and joon young learning to express how he truly feels! but... the love square? was probably the most annoying thing the rest in my opinion was nicely done! i know people had mixed feelings about the ending but i loved that after all the pain joon young and song ah went through they got a happy ending together! 7/10

find me in your memory - okay this show started off very slow and it was confusing at the start but as it progressed everything in the plot started to fall into place! i mean this show really took opposites attract to a new level where the male lead could remember every single detail from his life but the female lead had to forget some of her traumatic memories to help her cope with her life! they were also tied together through a mutual character who was a big part of their lives in a different way! just an interesting melodrama with interesting characters i liked it! and moon ga young... i love you queen!!! 7/10

THE MEDIOCRE KDRAMAS -

more than friends - was the storytelling in this show groundbreaking? no. was the acting decent? yes. also probably the main reason i stuck with this show until the end! i think we can all agree lee soo had the best character development on this show he started off as a bad boy who wore one ear stud to actually becoming a well liked character... who else did it like him? no one. also the chemistry between the mains was 🔥 but the second male lead was so annoying is there a opposite word for second lead syndrome because i had that for sure! i think the best part about this show was the people i watched it with on here... shoutout to the five of us ahsjsj also this show introduced me to a talented actor/singer like ong seong wu (y’all know my kpop knowledge is nonexistent so no i didn’t know he was in a band called wanna one) all in all a predictable show but i had fun watching it so 6.5/10

tale of the nine tailed - i didn’t actually watch this show i watched it through gifs and instagram posts ahsjsjs so am i qualified to talk about my opinion definitely no... will I talk about it anyways yes lmao. lee rang deserved better that’s all goodbye and take care. 5.5/10

start up - probably one of the most awaited opinions. y’all thought this would be in the worst kdramas section but i decided to give this show some rights. the show started off strong, lost it’s way after episode 6 and then the last episode gave me what i wanted so i have mixed feelings. the writing was not the best i think we can all agree, love triangle as a plot device? wow so groundbreaking 🤡 the characters on the other hand... i loved every single one of them i mean ship wars? i don’t know her. the show had a lot of potential that was wasted but we also got some cute moments between the characters so there was really no winning or losing with this show? but in all honesty you can’t put a talented cast together like this and then just decide to give the audience a mediocre plot but the writers did exactly that! i think i can redirect y’all to my ‘crimes this show committed’ post for a in-depth analysis. lastly nam do san was a GOOD and REFRESHING male lead and ji pyeong was also a GOOD and FUN second male lead!!! this show gave me the ugliest ship war ever that i was transported back to my high school tvd days so thank you for that!! but the cast was loveable and all had a lot of chemistry together so here’s a 5/10 maybe that's too generous but... i think the reason why i didn't enjoy watching this show as much was definitely because of the tag on here lmao

THE WORST KDRAMAS -

the king eternal monarch - i miss clowning this show so much. the amount of braincells i lost while trying to understand this plot... i should be compensated by the writers. however, woo do hwan was a treat to look at on a weekly basis... however the writers kept decreasing his screen time even though he had a dual role... make it make sense? and i cannot comment on the plot of this show because i still don’t understand anything? also in my opinion tae eul and lee gon were the most bland couple of 2020, there was no chemistry between them and there was just a random kiss in episode 5 and they randomly said i love you... where was the development? also lee gon was soooo boring and such a one dimensional male lead! literally all the side characters were so much more interesting and the cast was good... but this plot. 2/10

do do sol sol la la sol - i wanna fight the writer who decided that the plot twist on the show would be that jun is a minor? i had no expectations from this show but it looked cute and nonsensical but that plot twist made me run the other way so fast that i never looked back! just because jun is a boy they really thought this would be excused like lmao we all have critical thinking skills???? the clown behaviour. a solid 1/10

record of youth - i hate this show so much. imagine not utilising park so dam who just starred in the biggest oscar winning movie to her full potential. imagine just making her a love interest to park bo gum’s character in the year 2020. i watched it up until episode 6 and i kept waiting for her character to get development... but it never happened so i dropped this show. also this show featured the MOST useless love triangle i have ever seen in my life like what was the point? also park bo gum’s characters family was straight up annoying (minus the grandpa) but they got so much screen time like that should’ve been given to park so dam... also villainising a gay side character for no reason at all in the year 2020? this show was a waste of my time i want the 6 hours i spent watching this back. -100/10 

backstreet rookie - i watched one episode of this and literally wanted to rip my eyeballs out of my head. idk what ji chang wook was thinking when he signed this drama i think he lost his ability to read because that's the only reasonable explanation for why he chose to star in such a dumpster fire show! this show had a racist character... had a high schooler kiss an adult... sexist jokes... just the worst things you can think of in a drama... this show had it. i still can’t believe so many people watched this show to the point where it had better ratings than pbio... really made me question everyone’s taste? but sorry can’t relate my taste is excellent so here’s the rating this show actually deserves -1000/10

if you made it this far... thank you for reading. let’s continue to love some kdramas together and get clowned by others in 2021! looking forward to it 😅

#kdrama #mystic pop up bar #flower of evil #where your eyes linger #crash landing on you #psycho but it's okay #eighteen again #itaewon class #do you like brahms? #find me in your memory #more than friends #tale of the nine tailed #start up #the king eternal monarch #ddsslls #record of youth #backstreet rookie #komal talks #i actually did it ashdjsj #just read about your fave shows or most hated shows and enjoy #don't have to read the whole thing i'm just documenting this for myself #also every show that airs from december onwards is a 2021 show now #feel free to discuss with me further... i can be contacted via messages LMAO #my posts #* #kdrama review

[potteresque-ire]

Hello. I just turned to be a turtle recently after being a solo fan mostly because of toxic atmosphere of solo fans. May I ask, were relationships between XZ and YB solos always so intense and also bad attitude to BJYX even during the promotion “the untamed”? Or did this conflict start after the events of 2020? Thank you in advance.

Hello, and Happy 2021! I’m a super new fan of the fandom, and so these aren’t questions I’m qualified to answer at all. I’m more comfortable providing some wider sociopolitical contexts to fandom-related events because I’ve been reading about Chinese news for a loooong time. My “investigative interest” (oh dear, that sounds so pretentious) is also more on understanding the CP culture in general, how it ties with the country’s state of affairs rather than focusing specifically on Gg and Dd. While I’ve read back on some history re: gg and dd’s fandoms, Tumblr is the only site where I’ve interacted directly with fellow fans.

But I’ve written up what I’ve understand about solo and CP fans for c-dramas so far, mostly for my own benefit (I have a ridiculously poor memory!). Maybe it can offer some insight? This is very new information to me as well; so, if anyone spots something wrong or wants to supplement, please jump right in!

Wars between the fans of the leads of a CP (“ship” in English; stands for “couple”) aren’t new. Conflicts between solo and CP fans also aren’t new.

Competition is the most obvious cause of wars between the fans of the leads of a CP. Especially in the case of M/M pairings, the person “bound” to each idol by their CP is also, by default, about the most “direct” competitor one can have. They’re likely to be of the same age group, share similar fan demographics. Popularity of young male idols (often called “Little Fresh Meat” 小鮮肉, a nickname I’ve abhorred for the decade or so it’s come to existence) also isn’t expected to last, so the two CP leads must make the most of their newfound fame within the same time frame. The competition is more than fighting for similar roles; in China, another major arena is endorsements, in which an idol’s popularity is by measured by 1) the number they hold and 2) the units they sell. Here in the US, stars choose their endorsements based on how well they fit their image; there, stars take as many as they can as long as the negotiated terms are satisfactory. Hence, dd is the spokesperson of 25 products / services in 2020 (including an insurance company (!!)).

I’ve also read about this norm in the industry, which I have yet to verify: in China, if two stars compete for the endorsement of the same brand product, the one who loses will not get endorsements of same products from different brands — at least, not in the short term — because any brand who uses the star who lost would be seen as inferior. Hence, to lose the competition on one endorsement deal can mean losing the endorsement deals for an entire category of products.

(Someone on Weibo has pointed this out: while Gg and Dd have often endorsed competing brands of the same product: Budweiser (gg) and Yenching beer (dd), for example; they have never fought for the endorsement of same brand product. Again, I haven’t verified this.)

This part is easy to understand.

The next question is: why are solo fans against CP fans? “Girlfriend fans” — solo fans who can’t bear to seeing their idol paired up with anyone other than themselves — only make up a fraction of the fandom. How are CP fans generally perceived? 

My key findings so far: CP fans are *perceived* to be more likely to express negative views about their idol paired up with other actors / actresses, which will affect viewership and ratings, restrict the kind of roles their idol will be invited to play. More importantly, CP fans are *perceived* as fickle — more likely to walk away after their favourite CP drama has ended, because as CP lovers, they’re thought to be equally in love with the romantic gestures as with the stars who perform them on/off stage. ie, When another drama comes along featuring the same romantic gestures, the CP fans are expected to jump ship.

I highlight the word “perceive”, because while it doesn’t matter how solo fans see CP fans, it does matter how the business side of c-ent view CP fans and it appears to share this view. The c-YiZhan fandoms have been unhappy with the publicity of the upcoming adapted BL dramas for this reason — aside from their allegations that it’s copying The Untamed’s BTS, the thing that has offended them the most, perhaps, is the very idea that the marketing departments thought a few “leaked” photos of the leads acting intimately close are enough to woo them away from YiZhan, from Gg and Dd.

Given this, perhaps, prevalent view of CP fans, CP fandoms have been viewed as something disposable, almost, to be made, used and discarded quickly. 

Before and during the airing of the drama, the marketing / publicity teams fuel and encourage CP fandoms, reap the benefits in viewership from the ensuing discussions and hot searches. Solo fans usually aren’t threatened by CP fandoms in this nascent phase—CP fandoms have been far smaller in size and only grow during the broadcast.

More importantly, the norms have been that CP fandoms do not last.

CP fandoms do have a tendency to “self-combust” over time: fans * within * the fandom accusing each other of being partial to one of the leads — spending more money on A’s endorsements, for example, or buying more copies of B’s music. However, this isn’t how many CP fandoms die. Instead, once the show is over, the process of “Breaking the CP” begins. I’m not sure who gets this process going, but my guess is the leads’ management companies, with consent (willing or unwilling) from the actors. Breaking the CP means having the CP leads avoid each other as soon as the drama is done airing, and for as long as it takes for the CP fandoms to dissipate. It means no more appearing in the same drama and shows; no more sharing a stage; and if they happen to be at the same event, they are to communicate as little as possible. This “loosening the bind” between the leads is designed to free the actors up for the next CPs, and its way of execution can be very abrupt, very … cruel for the CP fans. For one of 2020 summer dramas (Love and Redemption 琉璃), for example, a popular character (het) CP pairing was broken up in the last fan meet, 10 days after the final episode had aired. The fan meet was marketed as a CP event (there was even merch for the CP); CPs fans bought the tickets, perfectly aware of the unsaid “CPs are made to be broken” rule and it’d likely be the last time they’d see their CP together. But the organisers denied them even this last chance; the leads of the CP had no interactions, not even eye contact during the entire event. The actor didn’t acknowledge the actress in his farewell speech. The fans understandably got upset; even outsiders sympathised, stating that the CP-breaking could be handled with a little more consideration. Word on the street was that because the male lead already had other dramas lined up, the CP had to be broken up as quickly as possible.

(Weibo Night from almost a year ago was seen as a “Break the CP” event for Gg and Dd. Some turtles still cry at the memory of it.)

There’s a term related to the breaking of CPs: 提純 (“increasing the purity”). It describes the ultimate goal of breaking CPs: increasing the proportion of solo (”pure”) fans by breaking up the CP and having the solo fandoms of each lead absorb the CP fans. Because solo fans are *perceived* to be more loyal (won’t jump ship the next romantic drama comes along), less likely to draw criticisms (especially if the CP is M/M and/or affect the RL lives of their stars), and have more purchasing power (as CP fans have to divide their resources between the two leads and equally).

How does this affect how solo fans see CP fans? Another way to say the above is: one CP fan is one fan the two solo fandoms fail to capture. One more CP fan is one less solo fan. “CP fan” should be a temporary identity. CP fandoms sequester resources from the solo fandoms until they’re broken up.

This sets the stage for conflicts if the CP fandoms refuse to fade, if the CP fans refuse to turn solo.

The conflict between solo and CP fandoms is, of course, even more heated for real-person CP’s, which can, indeed, pose a significant threat to the leads’ life and career. An easy example of the former is if one of the CP leads are in a RL relationship, and/or if the lead is straight but the CP is queer (this is the case for The Guardian (2018), the first popular adapted BL “dangai” drama). Another major issue with real-person CPs (queer or not) is that the media will make frequent comparisons of the leads’ follow-up career. If the CP “bind” remains, the lead perceived as less popular may be viewed as using the more popular one to sustain their popularity. Fans of the more popular lead do not take that well. The management company of the less popular lead takes that even less well, and its PR team will work even harder to eliminate the CP from public discussion.

Overall, the “breaking the CP” strategy works as intended. As long as the CP leads stop interacting, no more new candies are generated for the CP fandoms, and even the best candies have an expiration date. The CP fans move on, often to other CP pairings—the CP breaking process often leave them hurt and disappointed at the leads—and further propagating the perception that they are fickle souls who prefer candies over actors.

With this background, it doesn’t surprise me that the relationship between the fans of Gg, Dd, and Yizhan has been so intense since the airing of the Untamed… it would actually surprise me (much) more if it isn’t.

First and foremost, if I take away my YiZhan-tinted lens (as much as I can anyway!), the competition between Gg and Dd automatically becomes The Battlefield in c-ent. Gg and Dd are among the most popular idols right now, and there’s a strong urgency in this competition as idol popularity is perceived to have a limited shelf life. Now, 18 months after The Untamed, Gg and Dd are not only vying for survival in the same industry—which may encourage cooperation between the two solo fandoms—they’re vying for the throne.

Things are already extra tense that way. Here’s an analogy I can think of—it’s easier to accept losing a lottery by getting every number wrong than getting a single number wrong, and by one count. It’s harder for solo fans to accept being number 2, when number 1 was a co-star, the other half of their idol’s CP.

Now, into this unresolved tension, throw in a huge curveball known as the YiZhan fandoms. A curveball that isn’t even supposed to exist — CP fandoms are all supposed to fizzle out quickly after the show is over. Instead, the BJYX supertopic on Weibo (by far the biggest of the three Yizhan CPs) had 1.5 million members in January 2020. It now has 2.8 million (January 2021).

(For reference, dd’s supertopic has 5.4 million members and gg’s, 7.7 million.)

These YiZhan fandoms aren’t merely living on their last breath, their stale candies. They’re thriving. Self-combustion hasn’t happened. CP fans of Gg and Dd keep finding fresh candies, keep having new things to rejoice and scream about.

If I put myself in the shoes of a solo fan, what does this continued growth of the YiZhan fandoms mean? It means the “binding” between My Idol and That-Other-Idol-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named, each a contender of the c-ent throne, is strengthening instead of loosening. It means more and more fans of My Idol are exhibiting signs of wavering loyalty, by becoming fans of both My Idol and That-Other-Idol. Fan culture in China is highly organized, requiring strategy, cooperation and obedience when it comes to generating the best numbers for their idol (sells, ratings, viewership etc). Having to rely on the fickle CP fans to generate these numbers means uncertainty and anxiety.

People behave differently when they’re nervous. Some chew on their fingernails. Some attack.

2020, of course, make the solo fandoms even more nervous about each other. Gg, post-227, isn’t a safe person to be “bound to”, and also to have one’s career compared against—given the bad publicity that has circulated around him, given the fact that he has managed to stay on top in spite of it. Dd, meanwhile, has grown in popularity while Gg goes into hiding—while I personally do not, for a moment, believe Dd has anything to do with 227, it is within human nature to ask: if one loses—and in a manner so publicised, so catastrophic that even the Western media reported on it—who has the most to gain? Work culture in almost every industry in China is extremely cut-throat, and securing victory by not-so-clean methods isn’t uncommon with the immense pressure to perform. Fans are bringing in their experiences from RL in how they view their idol’s competition—with suspicion, with defensiveness. With swords sharpened and ready for counterattacks.

The ultimate cherry-on-top when it comes to causing conflicts between Gg’s, Dd’s and YiZhan fandoms is, of course, the fact that YiZhan is no garden-variety, heterosexual, character CP. It’s a M/M real person CP, in a society where homosexuality, while legal, is still considered “non-mainstream values” and explicitly censored from TV; where personal freedoms have overall been tightening and laws can change overnight. It’s one thing if their idol is truly in a queer relationship and chooses to announce it themselves; it’s a whole different story if it’s some fans of another idol who “out” them—who publicise their queerness that, in the eyes of these solo fans, may very well be fictional. 227 has already confirmed that in c-ent, idols pay the price of their fan’s wrongdoings and in this case, all it takes is for the YiZhan fandoms to make a single mistake—to celebrate one candy too loudly, for example (“to dance outside the circle”), and catch the attention of the wrong government official — to not only cost their idols their popularity, but their whole career. To the solo fans, therefore, the mere existence of the YiZhan fandoms pose a huge risk to their idol that should’ve been avoidable in the first place. And when they check out the new candies, what do they see? They see Gg leaving hints suggestive of Dd; they see Dd doing inexplicable things that can be linked to Gg. c-Turtles joke sometimes that solo fans are even better than they are at spotting the connections between Gg and Dd. But while turtles see these connections as evidences of a romantic relationship, what solo fans see is the other idol latching onto their own, whose fame makes it a reasonable act; they see it as the other solo fandom carelessly jeopardizing their own idol’s career for the sake of more noise and popularity.

The solo fandoms end up fighting. They have few reasons NOT to do so without the YiZhan-tinted lens.

That said though, I’m not sure if the wars between Gg’s, Dd’s and YiZhan fandoms are truly getting worse. As I write this, my thought is: perhaps it’s not that the fans are disliking each other more, but rather, more and more people are getting involved, and the stakes, the risks are becoming higher and higher. Gg and Dd both had fans during the filming of The Untamed, but they were a small fraction, quantity wise, to what it is now. Even if, at the time, 100% of Gg and Dd fans hated each other, they still wouldn’t have generated the noise than, say, if 0.01% of Gg’s fans are arguing with 0.01% of Dd’s fans now. The arguments then, however ugly they could be, would’ve stayed off hot searches, and largely within the two fandoms. These days, however, when even Gg shaking a pen can make it into hot search (as he did during the Tencent Awards), every heated exchange is amplified by passer-bys, by antis, by done-for-money re-bloggers. Quarrels snowball exponentially to the number of mouths pitching in; so does the antagonistic sentiments behind the hurtful words purposefully or accidentally spilled. Meanwhile, the c-YiZhan fandoms have reached the size that as much as they’ve tried to keep everything away from the public eye, it’s not really possible anymore. Search BJYX online, and videos after videos pop up for any outsider who wish to get a primer—and there’s no control over that content. Gg and Dd’s commercials hint at it. The Tencent Awards show host cued it. Before, the YiZhan fandoms may still be able to get away with a mistake or two. Now, they can make half a mistake and all the info already floating around will make sure that half a mistake will round to one.

If I were a solo fan, perhaps I’d scream my lung out too. Think of how terrible this all is, if Dd(Gg) is actually Gg(Dd)’s most fierce competition, as his being the other half of the CP is meant to be. Think of all the damages these fantastical speculations can do, if My Idol isn’t queer and tomorrow, the government comes down with a decree that outlaws queerness. Maybe My Idol will be spared if he isn’t at the top. But My Idol is at the top. Everyone will point to him. The hot searches will show his name, make sure the powers-that-be see it. He … his downfall… can be made an example …

Okay, okay, I’ll stop playacting here. Phew. That was scary * pats turtle shell to confirm its presence * :) . But can you see how deep that fear can go, for a fan who really, really loves and is therefore protective of their idol? How this fear, which stems from love, can turn into hate and generally loud, angry yelling across the internet? 

#Anonymous #pie answers #pie metas #yizhan #bjyx

[leossmoonn]

Confessions [Stefan Salvatore]

masterlist 

pairing - stefan salvatore x fem!reader

type - fluff, lil angst

note / request - “hi i just wanted to say absolutely loved your recent stef imagine🥰🥰can you write more of him? if you’re up for it!! also one where maybe like they’re always teasing and bickering because they like each other <33″ YES AH I LOVE STEFAN. yall are gonna hate me SO MUCH in the ending. enjoy :)

summary - after a little teasing goes to far, you’re forced to tell stefan your real feelings for him

warnings / includes  - mild language, suggestive language. italics are your thoughts 

————

*gif isn’t mine* 

“Stefan!” You exclaimed. 

Stefan rolled his eyes. “I had him!”

“No, you didn’t!” You shouted. “God, why can’t you just let me do my job! Why do you have to be such a control freak.”

“Cause I’m the one who made the plan,” Stefan said. 

“Yeah, and it was literal dog-shit. I was about to stake him!” You said, putting your hands up in the air in exasperation.

Stefan rolled his eyes. “You should be thankful. You would’ve been toast if I didn’t come in.”

You clenched your jaw. “I’ll make you into toast.” You went to lunge at him, but arms pulled your back quickly. You kicked your feet in the air, trying to get out of the hold that Damon had you in. 

“Let me go! I need to kick his ass!” You exclaimed. 

Stefan smirked, “You’re human, you wouldn’t last one second.”

“We’ll see about that,” you said, managing to rustle out of Damon’s grip. 

“Stop it!” Caroline yelled. You looked at the blonde who had her fangs out, ready to get in between you and Stefan. 

“He started it!” You straightened up, pointing at Stefan.

“No, she did!” Stefan exclaimed. 

“You two are act like 5 year olds. Grow up. Y/n, you were about to die if Stefan hadn’t come in,” Caroline said. 

You scoffed, turning to your friend. “Really, Care?”

“See, told you,” Stefan snickered. 

“But,” Caroline started, looking to Stefan. “You should’ve trusted her. She's more than capable of handling herself.”

You smirked. “HA! In your face, Salvatore!”

Stefan rolled his eyes. “I just didn’t want you to get hurt. I can’t live without my best friend.”

You teasing smirk turned to a soft smile. “Aw, Stef, I always knew you cared about me.”

“Barely,” Stefan scoffed. 

“Oh, sure,” you giggled, walking up to him. “You adore me.”

“Only in some aspects,” Stefan said. “Oh, yeah? What are those aspects?” You smiled. 

“Like when you’re quiet,” Stefan smiled at you. 

Ouch.

You frowned, “Wow, so nice.”

“Well, you asked,” Stefan shrugged. 

“Hm, true. Alright well, I’m tired of getting my feelings hurts by a vampires so, I’m gonna go home,” you said, walking over to the door. 

“No, Y/n! Stay for dinner!” Elena begged.  “Nah, I’m okay. I have ice cream at my house,” you shrugged. 

“You sure?” Caroline asked. 

“Yeah. See you guys tomorrow,” you smiled and waved before exiting the Salvatore’s house. You sighed and went to your car, going in and heading home. Once you got home, you put on your pjs and opened a pint of cookies and cream ice cream. You turned on Criminal Minds and cuddled up on the couch. 

15 minutes into the episode, a knock on your door sounded. You paused the tv, getting up. You grabbed pepper spray and a knife you had hiding in a vase, going to the door hesitantly. 

It’s 10:50 PM. Who is at my door?

You peaked through your window, relaxing immediately as you saw Stefan. You put your weapons on a nearby table, opening the door. 

“Hey,” you smiled. 

“Hi,” Stefan smiled back. 

“What’re you, uh, doing here?” You asked. “I came bearing gifts. As an apology for being mean,” Stefan said, holding out a box of chocolates, a box of pizza, and some soda. 

“And I should forgive you, why?” You asked. 

“Because I’m your best friend and you love me?” He smiled. 

You pursed your lips, putting your finger on your chin. “Hm, well, I do love chocolate and pizza and soda. I also kind of consider you as a friend, too, so... sure. I forgive you.”

Stefan smiled. “Awesome. Can I come in and hang out for a bit?” 

“Sure,” you said, moving out of the way so he could step in. He stepped inside, slipping off his shoes and his leather jacket. 

“Whatcha watching?” He asked, walking into the living room. 

“Criminal Minds,” you said, walking in with him. 

“Ah, nice. The show doesn’t scare you?” Stefan asked. 

“Not when you’ve seen a vampire rip a person’s head off right in front of you,” you chuckled, taking your seat on the couch again. Stefan sat next to you, putting his arm on the top ledge of the couch. 

“Right,” he chuckled.

You sat back into him, putting your head on his chest. Stefan put his arm around you, pulling you closer to him. 

This was normal behaviour for you and him. You two had been best friends for the past 3 years since he came here. You two connected instantly. You were witty and teasing, which was something Stefan couldn’t help but be intrigued by and attracted to. After finding out he was a vampire, you two became closer. You learned all his secrets, everything about his childhood, and slowly fell in love with him. It was cliché, you knew, but it was true.

You had always been attracted to him, since day one. He was handsome, no doubt. He was also kind and dedicated to helping his friends and family, which was something you admired. You’re little crush on him stemmed from when he had saved you from Kol Mikaelson. Kol pushed you off the terrace after you tried to stake him, making you fall hundred of feet. You truly thought you were about to die, but Stefan Salvatore swooped in and saved you. From the moment he caught you in his arms, when you looked into his eyes, when your lips almost met, was the exact moment you knew you were starting to like him. The time you realized you were in love with him was when the teasing started. 

You two had been friends for about a good year or so. You two had always had a playful relationship. You two made it that way because you two liked each other and it was easier to be mean to each other than admit your feelings, but you two didn’t know that about each other. Anyways, the moment you fell in love with him was when he was helping you cook for you and your friends. You were trying to have a nice night without all the crazy. Stefan and you were cutting some vegetables up when you sliced your finger. You expected him to go all crazy, but really, he helped you out. When he was cleaning up the cut and wrapping the bandage around your finger, there was a moment when both your eyes met and a little voice in your head that said, ‘he’s the one you love and are gonna marry’.

It had shocked you, at first, and there was a period of time where you shut him out because you couldn’t deal with your feelings. But you soon realized that you couldn’t live without your best friend and that if you weren’t gonna confess your feelings, you would at least keep him as a best friend. So, you two started to tease each other more and would bicker like an old married couple. Everyone seemed to notice your feelings for each other but you two. It was truly amazing, but you two seemed happy this way, so no one every really bothered you guys. 

“Wow, that’s not gross at all,” Stefan said, commenting on what was happening in the show. 

“Yeah. it’s kinda weird, but I’ve been watching this show for 10 seasons so, you know, I’m very used to it,” you shrugged. 

Stefan smiled down at you, admiring how pretty you looked all natural, hair in a bun, and in your pjs. He liked how focused you were on the show, even though mutilated bodies were being shown on the screen, very very up close. 

“I never would’ve pegged you for a criminal show type-of-girl,” Stefan said. 

“I’m full of surprises,” you grinned. 

“Yeah, I know,” Stefan smirked. You looked up at him, your eyes skimming his lips before gazing into his eyes. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You asked. 

“Nothing,” he shrugged. 

You started to yawn, putting your attention back on the tv. 

“You should get some rest. You had a big day,” Stefan said. 

“No, I wanna stay up and be a rebellious teen!” You exclaimed.

“You’re 18. You’re not a teen anymore,” Stefan chuckled. 

You smiled, “True. But hey, you are! Aren’t you, like, 17?” You asked, looking back up at him. 

“Yeah, but I’m also 165 years old,” he said. 

“Haha, you’re still younger than me. I order you to go to your room and sleep. Oh, and you can’t talk back to me,” you giggled, teasing him. 

Stefan rolled his eyes, “Ha-ha, you’re so funny.”

“Stefan Antonio Salvatore! Do not talk back to me!” You exclaimed, getting up from the couch. “Go to you room!”

Stefan stood up with you, towering over you. “How about I take you with me?”

You looked into his deep, green eyes. Your breath hitched, your heart racing to the point where you thought you were going to have a heart attack. Stefan took your hand in his, lighting your skin on fire. Heat rose up to your face, making you hide your face from his view so he didn’t see you blushing. But he put his other hand on your chin, lifting your face up and looking you in the eyes. 

Your eyes went down slowly to his lips, subconsciously licking your own at the thought of kissing him. Your eyes went back up to his, noticing his eyes on your lips, too. Stefan’s arm snaked around your waist, pulling you in so your bodies touched. You felt the warmth radiating off of him, wanting to stay there forever. And as much as you wanted to kiss him, you knew you couldn’t. You knew he didn’t like you like that, and this was one of his ways of teasing you. So, you pulled away, turning away from his once more. 

“You should, um, go. We’re both tired and stuff,” you said. 

Stefan frowned, wishing you would follow along with him, but he didn’t try again. He didn’t want to force you into anything, especially since he wasn’t too sure about your feelings for him. 

“Alright. I’ll go. I’ll see you later,” he said. 

You nodded, not looking at him. “Bye.”

You heard the door open, hearing Stefan mutter a ‘goodbye’. Once the door closed, you started to cry. Tears that were forming in your eyes fell, coming down like a waterfall. You put your fist in your mouth, trying to drown out the sound of your cries, not wanting to wake your mom. You went to your room, curling up on your bed and hugging your pillow. 

I wish I would’ve kissed him. 

————

You walked in Elena’s house, your mouth watering at the smell of bacon and eggs. 

“Hm, who’s cooking?” You asked. 

“Me,” Stefan smiled once you came around the corner. 

“Oh, great,” you said.  “Aw, come on, I apologized to you last night. Be nice,” Stefan said. 

“Being nice to do is the last thing on my to-do list,” you snorted. “Give me some eggs and bacon?” “Nope. Say sorry,” Stefan said. 

You rolled your eyes, walking over to Stefan and the stove. “In your dreams. Now, give me food, Stuffy,” you smiled, using a nickname you had made up for him. 

“Not a chance, Y/n/n,” Stefan smirked. 

You sighed and tried to grab the plate of bacon that was in his hand, but he held it up in the air. You huffed, jumping up and trying to get the plate from him. 

“Stefan, I’m hungry! I didn’t have an actual dinner last night. Please,” you begged, jumping up, barely touching the plate. 

Stefan put the plate down to your reach. You smiled, “See, I knew you couldn’t resist me.”

Right as you were about to grab the bacon, Stefan swiftly put the plate down, taking both your wrists in his hands. You fought against him, a big smile on your face. 

Caroline, Elena, and Alaric scoffed in the living room. 

“Are they ever gonna get together?” Alaric asked. 

“Sometimes it seems like it,” Caroline says. “And sometimes it doesn’t,” Elena sighed. 

“Why? They’re like, perfect for each other,” Alaric said, smiling a little when seeing Stefan scoop you in, spinning you around. 

“They’re so oblivious to each other’s love, it’s annoying,” Elena said. 

“And weirdly movie-like,” Caroline said. She sighed, looking at the two of you longingly. “I want what they have.”

“More like lack there of,” Alaric snickered. 

Elena hit his shoulder, going over to the kitchen.  “Okay, love birds, let’s eat. I’m starving,” Elena said.

Stefan let you go, your feet landing on the ground. 

“So you’ll listen to Elena and not me?” You asked. 

“Hm... yep,” Stefan smiled sweetly. 

“Rude,” you remarked, making your way to the kitchen table. 

Stefan brought over the food and you dug in. You all talked about a new plan to take out Klaus, which led to you needing to go back to your house to get some vampire-hunting supplies. 

“Mind if I go with you? Might be some heavy lifting I’ll need to do,” Stefan said. 

You rolled your eyes, “I’m strong enough, but sure. I could use someone to make it less boring.” You got up, putting on your shoes and jacket. 

“See you later, guys,” you smiled and waved to the rest of your friends. 

They waved back at you and Stefan followed you out to your car. 

“So, what’s the reason you wanted to go with me?” You asked, getting in your car. 

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I’m bored.”

You snorted, shaking your head. “Okay, yeah, what’s the real reason.”

“I um... I wanted to talk about last night,” Stefan said. 

“Alright, but nothing happened. We did our little friendly-cuddle, you got all up in my personal space, and then you left and I went to bed,” you said. 

Stefan shook his head, “No, Y/n. That’s not what happened.”

You parked your car in your driveway, getting out and going into your house. 

“Then what happened, Stefan. Tell me,” you said, walking into your room and going into your closet. 

“Well, we did do our cuddle thing, but it definitely wasn’t friendly. We also almost kissed,” Stefan said, following you. 

“Sure, Stefan. You have a funny imagination, you know,” you said, getting out your box of weaponry. 

“We did, Y/n. Stop being in denial. I also know that you cried after I left,” he said. 

You looked up at him, scoffing and moving past him. 

He just wants to get under my skin.

“Y/n, this isn’t one of the times where you can just walk away and we forget about it. I’m serious,” Stefan said. 

Shit. 

“How do you know I cried?” You asked. 

“I... I heard you using my super-hearing through the door,” Stefan admitted. 

You shook your head, “Stalker.”

Stefan went up behind you, grabbing your forearm, causing the box you had to drop on the floor. He turned you to him, looking deep and hard into your eyes. 

“Let me go, Stefan,” you muttered through a clenched jaw. 

“No. Why won’t you talk to me about this?” He asked. 

“Be-Because I don’t want to. I have a right to not want to do anything, you know. Let me go!” You exclaimed, fighting against him. 

Stefan shook his head. “No. I want to know why you pulled away. We had a moment, Y/n, and we’ve always been having moments since we met. I... I don’t know if you are in love with me, like I am with you, but I felt something last night. I know you did, too. I saw in your eyes and I know that you were crying because you pulled away and you were upset. So, Y/n, why’d you pull away?”

You looked up at him helplessly. “I... I pulled away because I was scared.”

“Scared of what?” Stefan asked softly. 

“Scared of what would happen. I didn’t know if you loved me back. I was scared that if I kissed you, that I would lose our friendship. And as much as I wanted to kiss you, I can’t risk losing you,” you confessed. 

Stefan’s hands let go of your wrists, going over to your waist. He pulled you closer, your bodies touching once again. Your heart beat against your ribcage, making you more nervous than ever. You looked up at him, leaning in closer. 

“You’re in love with me?” You asked. 

“Yeah. Probably since we became friends,” Stefan said. 

“Me, too,” you smiled. 

“I figured after last night,” Stefan smiled. 

You chuckled, “Yeah.”

“So, are you gonna pull away now?” Stefan asked. He put his hand on your cheek, his hand staying on the small of your back. He looked into your eyes, waiting for your answer.

You shook your head with a smile. “No, not this time.”

————

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[cloveroctobers]

SHEA BUTTER BABY | S. James

Requested by: @theshyprincess “Can I get a spencer James getting married and smut biracial if I’m not bothering you I really like your writing”

A/N: decided to do this in hc form, hope that’s cool? And it’s been my thing lately anyways lol. Hope you like this one! I also hope I channeled Spencer well 🙃

WARNINGS: light smut + some curse words ofc!

We all know Spencer takes the world on his shoulders; when his finds you, you become his world

You meet freshman year in university, specifically on the football field and decided to invite him to a sorority party because what’s the best way to start off your freshman year? A little party never hurt nobody

Except it did, things got rowdy resulting with a huge ass knot on your forehead and losing consciousness for a few minutes

You expected Spencer to dip like any other asshole dude would have but you were shocked that he actually came to your aid and walked you back to your dorm even tho you had a “big ass egg” growing from your forehead

You could laugh about it a little then, but more so now

He actually asked for your number before you departed, even tho you thought you majorly screwed whatever this was up but he wanted to see you again and you were more than happy to oblige

It was instant friendship with a touch of flirtations but you knew that he recently got out of some heartbreak from his senior year of high school and you had no choice but to respect that he wasn’t looking for a relationship right now

Day by day you became the best of friends spending majority of your time together while also getting to know each other’s outside friends and family, you became each other’s family

It was end of sophomore year where Spencer decided he wanted to give it a go but it was your turn to be leery since you watched him go through some girls but he never flaunted that in front of you, yet you always knew

You didn’t want to be his last option

“You could never be that, y/n. You’re so much more than what you think I think of you.”

Words of affirmation is definitely Spencer’s love language and he had no problem saying how he felt about you

He openly admitted that he was confused at first, trying to fight with his inner self on taking your friendship into the love zone. He’s always gone the friendship route first before it turned into romance—well maybe not with Kia but his past two relationships he did

He was not only confused but nervous and you made him work a little bit to get a date from you but you didn’t hold out for too long since you felt Spencer was your person

You took things slow but you still felt like friends except now you held onto each other a little longer and touches seem to burn now but you liked it, really liked it

Senior year is when he proposes, he’s actually the second out of his group of friends back home to get engaged...JJ was the first and actually went through with the marriage after one drunken night in vegas with some girl who was studying physical therapy

Sure it’s only been two years but like your grandmother always says, “when you feel a pull in your heart whenever they’re not around, they’re the one baby.” And your grandparents got married only after knowing each other for four months. Every love is different

You were a sappy mess and Spencer found it humorous while slipping the ring on and embracing you, “we not doing that. Save it until the wedding, huh?”

And he gets a few nice whacks to the chest but he can take it ofc as he’s kissing you so gently

It’s a private moment and you wouldn’t have it any other way

A year and a few months after you graduate, Spencer gets drafted into the NFL and you’re still searching for a job you majored in

You’re both living apart with you going back to your hometown in Arizona and Spencer in Cali. Things aren’t easy but you’ve been planning your wedding and it feels like Spencer is just saying he’s okay with everything which is frustrating. You don’t want to do this alone and you need to find a place to live together, you didn’t want to live with Spencer’s mom and brother as much as you loved them. You were both adults and needed to take the wheel

Yet it always felt like Spencer was busy planning on putting further distance between you since he was secure in his career and you just felt stuck

That caused a riff between you two but Spencer didn’t like that silent treatment bs. You were gonna talk to him one way or another

Once you get through it, which you definitely do!! it’s pure heaven and you couldn’t be happier

You get married at a banquet hall

You both have a lot friends and family that’ve invited

Your best friends + sibs are your best men, bridesmaids, maid of honor

Spencer leaves a chair open for his dad up front with his mom and brother 🥲

Initially you were going to have your guests pick whatever seat they wanted and just have your immediate family have the front areas but you knew that would probably end up hectic with the strong personalities you had within your friend and family group so you kept it traditional. Your family/friends on one side and spence’s family/friends on the other

Memorable wedding, you were gorgeous and he was so handsome. You loved when Spencer got dressed up, it did something to you and you couldn’t wait for your honeymoon

It wouldn’t be anything over the top like The Bakers tried to gift you with, you just wanted something simple but nice with the man you loved

You were going to Palm Springs the next morning!!! Spending the night in the hotel

You were going to hold out even longer until the night you reached your honeymoon destination 😌

Spencer wanted the both of you to write your own vows and you sure didn’t know how you would compete with this guy. Spencer James always had a way with words!!!

He ofc had you a sobbing mess again but you knew it was never about out-showing the other

when you seal your marriage with a kiss, his hands rest securely on your hips with your hand cradling his jaw and you’re all smiles as the hall fills with cheers

“I love you, Mrs. James.” He’s got that smirk of a smile on his lips and love in his eyes

“As do I, Mr. James.” And you can’t wipe the smile from your own lips even if you tried

One thing you both know how to do is party so the reception goes on for awhile, until about 3 am even tho you both have to be on the road by 10 or a little later since check in isn’t until early afternoon

You’re both so giddy you can hardly sleep but you eventually do, you in your dress + Spencer in his dress shirt but he’s lost the tie and loosened his pants

Since Palm Springs is a 2 hr drive you’re reminiscing on how you basically taught Spencer how to drive and look at how far he’s come now with the rental you’re both using for 4 days and 3 nights

“so it’s my fault you don’t know how to instruct?” Which leads to harmless bickering over spencer’s road trip playlist

it’s been agreed that you each had an hour to play your playlists then for the left over minutes you’d listen to the radio once you got to your destination

your airbnb is REAL colorful and modern, not exactly your tastes but nonetheless it was your getaway from home. You were used to the desert while spencer? Not so much

“the hell was that?” Spencer is dodging and weaving especially if they fly

“looks like fire ants.” keep your distance.” “Why do you know what that is?” “I get stuck watching discovery channel with my dad when I can’t sleep and he’s always up. I saw one episode about them and we don’t want to mess with those bastards.”

you don’t do much with the rest of your day there, just enjoying each other’s company in the air bnb

You decide to shower while Spencer is ordering y’all your dinner from grubhub and deciding what you’re going to watch on firestick that you bought with you

you tend to take long showers so you’re just about done rubbing shea butter into your skin when Spencer announces that the food is here through the door

when you step out you’re on a mission with your silk robe, bustier, and garter

although you kept your own values of saving yourself until marriage—while Spencer was way more experienced you didn’t feel as nervous to get intimate with the man of your dreams

but that changed the moment his set his eyes on you

“what’s this?” He smirks, popping a fry into his mouth

You’re playing coy as your skin shines, leaning over to steal one of his fries. “My pajamas.”

He’s amused but definitely turned on, “oh aight, so that’s just the norm for you now?”

“I could change.” You pointed back to the where the bathroom sat

“I ain’t say all that, Mrs. James.” Spencer blinks then lifts his head upwards, “c’mere.”

And you move to sit on his lap with excitement even tho you think you hide it pretty well. You’ve always pictured how this would be and you knew from stories from your cousins and friends that half of them didn’t have the most romantic experience...

You didn’t need the rose petals and candles but you knew Spencer was a romantic at heart, plus you had plenty of time to see what was up his sleeve and knew this wouldn’t be the only time as of tonight. You were hoping!!!

“Are we starting dinner?” You ask, wrapping an arm across his shoulders but his eyes are set only on you

“I’m hungry for somethin’ else right now,” his nose presses against your beating throat, “and it just walked in here, looking good enough for this appetite.”

Now he’s kissing on your neck and when he gets to that sweet spot behind your ear he’s got the confirmation he needs but he needs to hear you say it. And he asks with his eyes which you reply with a dip of your head

Now he’s got his hands underneath your thighs, locking your legs around his waist for you and he’s off to your temporary bedroom

He’s always so gentle with you, even when he’s laying you down on this bed

“I promise the next time we do this, I’ll make the place look special for you.” He says into your neck and your nod as you feel the weight of him against you

You’re gasping for breath before he’s been fully touched you yet, “we still have the tub and a couple of days.”

He breathes out a laugh, “that we do. That we do.” Before your lips are brought back together

You know you are loved with the way Spencer touches you and speaks to you even in your most intimate moment

He builds you up before he gives himself all to you. It’s something you heard about, SEEN and knew it was crucial but you didn’t want to put too much logic in this moment. You don’t think you can even think straignt with the way you’re on fire for Spencer rn

And he’s know that but he needs you to be patient, he knows how to take his time. And he should know what he’s doing...he does

He’s seeing what your body likes, he’s watching his face even when you begin to whine for him

He knows when you’re truly ready even when you’re begging

He gives you your first climax with his mouth and you know you need more because you knew how much you loved his lips but you loved them even more now

“even better than I imagined,” he says with a lick of his lips from below before pressing a kiss on your abdomen and you’re still seeing stars

“you okay up there?” He asks. He’s always seeking reassurance from you. That’s too important to him, you’re too important to him

You have to say it as your vision slowly starts to splat back to normal, “I need you i-in— but there’s heat pooling in your cheeks. You’re a bit shy now as you’re getting in your head wondering how you must have sounded or looked in that moment of your first climax but it didn’t seem as if Spencer was disappointed. He seemed just as happy to please

He knows what you need. He worked with your body up to this moment

So he’s kissing up your body, slow and soft. He looks into your eyes before he glances over to grab his wallet from the night stand to grab protection

you didn’t think this far ahead but part of you wanted to know if there was a difference without, ofc you knew the risks without and you had forever to try so you made no comment about the choice to use protection

You wanted to do the honors, and so you did

You were surely in awe to be this close and personal with something you get to have for a lifetime

“Careful, something might fly in there.”

You can’t help but you roll your eyes and snort as Spencer places a kiss to your cheek before he reaches up to lock your hands together and up over your head, your wedding bands contrasting against the bright orange walls and your shea butter skin

“I’m ready.” You whisper, your eyes shifting from Spencer’s deep brown eyes to where your bodies would connect

Spencer hums as he keeps his eyes on yours before lining up, he has to free one of his hands to guide

and your mouth falls open with a slight arch in your back

He doesn’t move right away, he needs to be sure

when you lock both legs around his hips, tugging him closer than close to you, fully allowing him in your space, you then squeeze your hands tighter together, never wanting to let go

Spencer James was all you ever needed and you were more than thrilled to continue this journey of life with him

#all american #all american season 3 #Spencer James #Spencer James x reader #all american x reader #all american fanfic #all american fan fiction #all american hcs #all american cw #daniel ezra

[merry-kuroo]

Top 10 2020 Anime

Hello everyone! Its the last day of 2020, and like with every year, here is my top 10 anime list. This list covers anime that aired this year only :) Hopefully you can use this list as a recommendation for something to watch. But tbh this list is for me to remember which wonderful anime made my year a little brighter :D I apologize for any typos lol.

1.) Tower of God

AHHH! I love Tower of God so much!! So, I almost dropped it at episode 1 because I was really confused. But I stuck with it and I’m glad I did. Tower of God gave me HxH vibes, but it was still different enough where I didn’t need to compare the two. The opening and ending by Stray Kids was amazing too.

Because I loved Tower of God so much, I made a Webtoon account and ever since then I’ve been hooked on Webtoons. I’m really glad they partnered with Crunchyroll to bring us this anime!

I read the TOG Webtoon and it explained things a lot better. I highly recommend going to read it after watching the anime!

I hope there is a season 2, but I won’t get my hopes up :( I’m sure this anime was just advertisement for the comic.

So, yeah, go check out Tower of God <3

2.) Great Pretender

WIT Studio has done it again. First with Attack on Titan, then Seraph of the End. They keep bringing me my favorite animes.

I love animes that feature a found family, and cons. Great Pretender brought all of that and more. Great characters, jokes, missions, and music. The music in Great Pretender is fantastic (I mean the ending song is a Queen song!)

I still stand by my opinion that Part 1 was better. I wasn’t a huge fan of season 2 and the ending as well. I think they dropped the ball. But I still won’t let that stop me from recommending it to you! It was still fun to watch :D

I’m going to miss Team Confidence <3

3.) Weathering With You

So, I have been a fan of Makoto Shinkai’s movies for a long time (5 Centimeters Per Second will always have a special place in my heart). So, when I saw that Weathering With You was coming to the movie theater, I immediately purchased a ticket. It was such a surreal experience watching in the theaters.

This was the last movie I saw in theaters before...you know >.> I’m glad this movie was my last too. It makes it even more special.

Everyone, please go see this movie. It’s beautiful. It will make you laugh and cry. I left the theater with tears in my eyes. It was such a amazing experience. I’m patiently waiting for his next movie!

4.) Kaguya Sama: Love is War Season 2

My favorite rom-com returned with a season 2. The opening is still stuck in my head. It always will be lol.

Anyway, this season was not only hilarious, but there was development between Kaguya and Miyuki <3

Miko IIno was also a interesting character. She is so different from everyone else, so I’m excited to see how being on the student council will change her. Maybe she and Ishigami will start to get long lol.

Another thing that made this season special was Ishigami’s backstory, and how Miyuki saved him. I just really love their bromance, okay?

Please go check out Kaguya Sama: Love is War if you haven’t! It’s funny and heart warming <3

5.) Jujutsu Kaisen

I’ve been hyped for this anime for like a year! When it was announced last November, I was like AFJAIOFJAOGLJMAPOGJ

I love the manga, and the adaption is doing a fantastic job so far. I definitely ended up loving Sukuna more due to the anime adaption though lmaooo.

Not a lot to say here except, go watch Jujutsu Kaisen <3 and read the manga!

6.) Moriarty the Patriot

I wasn’t sure if I was going to like this anime or not. I only started watching it because people said Sebastian Moran was Daddy! Kuroo lmaooo

But I have to say...I do like that Albert was like “Oh yes lets bring William and Albert into our home” then William was like “Haha hey Albert do you hate the upper class and nobility too? You wanna murder your brother and parents, burn down the house, and reform society?” And Albert is like “DON’T MIND IF I DO!” (The Moriarty brothers are wild af, my God.)

I liked each individual case, and it got even more intense when Sherlock and John were introduced. Super excited for season 2!

The opening and ending songs are also fantastic. Go give them a listen!

7.) Digimon Adventure 2020/Digimon Adventure Tri/Last Evolution Kizuna

Tfw you go to buy tickets Digimon Last Evolution Kizuna, but all the movie theaters shut down :(

ANYWAY

I was super hyped when Last Evolution Kizuna was announced, and then the reboot of the 1999 anime. I finished up Digimon Adventure Tri...which could’ve been better tbh. I only liked the first three movies, so at least I got some good content out of them lol.

I like the new spin on the new Digimon anime, and I’m excited to see what they’ll do next. I kinda want a reboot of 02 Digimon...and Digimon Tamers and Frontier, but that may be pushing it lmao.

Last Evolution Kizuna was absolutely phenomenal. It was the perfect 20th anniversary movie :)

8.) Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun

Another show I started at the beginning of the year! I read the manga in 2019, and I was happy to hear it was getting a anime adaption! I enjoyed this series a lot, and I really want there to be a second season. I feel like some stuff was left out. But the anime might have been created just to promote the manga.

The opening song, the different wonders of the school, and the art style quickly made this one of my favorites!

9.) Idolish7 Second Beat

Idolish7 is vastly underrated. It’s more than just pretty guys singing and dancing. Every character in the show has gone through their own hardships, and all the characters are fleshed out well.

The second season did not disappoint. It still served me with a good dose of angst, drama, and comedy.

And season 3 was announced!!! I wasn’t expecting that, so that surprise made me really happy <3.

I was really sad when Idolish7 stopped airing back in the spring, but I’m glad they were able to finish up the season this year :D

10.) Haikyuu!! To the Top

Alright, so my excitement deflated when Part 1 aired back in January. I hated the new art style and while Part 1 did have some good character development moments, I was really bored :/

The OVAs were really good though >.> I love Nekoma and Fukrodani so those were fun to watch.

Part 2 was a 100 times better. I accepted the fact that the art style wasn’t going to change and we wouldn’t have those cute breaks where the volleyball players would serve the ball and hit the water bottle. Once I got over that, I found myself enjoying part 2.

The two Nekoma episodes,the episodes focusing on the Miya Twins and Kita were my personal favorites. But overall, Karasuno vs. Inarizaki was fantastic and I enjoyed it a lot!

I need season 5 to be announced already!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!

#tower of god #kami no tou #great pretender #the great pretender #weathering with you #tenki no ko #kaguya sama love is war #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #moriarty the patriot #yuukoku no moriarty #digimon adventure 2020 #digimon last evolution kizuna #jibaku shounen hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #idolish7 #idolish7 second beat #haikyuu!! #top 10 anime #anime #2020 #my top 10 anime list #tumblr diary #12/31/2020

[purrincess-chat]

Cat’s Definitive Ranking of Every ML Episode as of 4/22/21

Are you guys ready for this? I did the thing. You’re all welcome. Don’t ever ask me for anything again. You can watch me get progressively more unhinged in real time. 

Now, just to preface this, I did not give this too much thought. Most of these are just my gut feelings. I went through every episode and just made some snap judgments based off the lasting impressions I’ve been left with. These are my opinions. If you don’t like them, tough. And also I don’t care. Go spend 4 hours making your own damn ranking. And shut the hell up. Anyway, this is probably the longest post I’ve ever made, so I’m gonna put it all under a read more. Click on it if you have an hour to read it. Okay, here we go!

1.     Origins II- Good starting point for our heroes. Good establishment of canon ships and character dynamics. Umbrella scene literally stole my wallet. Cannot emphasis enough that I am whipped for the umbrella scene. I wrote a whole ass AU just to say how whipped I am for the umbrella scene. In the Rain will play at my wedding. Jk. Weddings are for suckers. But dammit if I don’t want these kids to get married. 10/10

2.     Origins I- Good introduction to lore. Good introduction to characters. Good establishment of status quoyo. Just good. 10/10

3.     Simon Says- Listen, I am nothing if not a shipper at heart. This episode just sparks joy. And the whole series almost ended when Gabriel almost jumped off the roof. I was really rooting for this one. This was the episode where I saw Ladrien and went yes, ma’am, I’ll have one of those. 10/10

4.     Evillustrator- Are you all surprised? Cat, the MC-skeptic ranked the pivotal MC episode so highly? Well, let me tell you all a thing, I started this fandom out a MC shipper because of this episode. Their first interaction is gold. I don’t deny that. I enjoy it. This is the MC dynamic I fell in love with. Yall toxic shippers ruined MC for me when you opened your mouths and spat in the face of Ladrien and baselessly declared MC the sin-ship. We all know it’s Ladrien. Stop kidding yourselves. Boy in leather catsuit? Please. Basic ass vanilla bitches. I’m getting off-topic. Solid episode 10/10. We love to see it.

5.     Stormy Weather- Baby’s first Miraculous episode. It holds a special place in my heart. It’s a solid episode. Good establishment of what the show is. Fun villain. Good times. Fond memories. 10/10

6.     Riposte- Listen, I know I’m an Adrinette stan, but hear me out: Ladrien. It’s just so good. And Kagami was compelling in this episode. It was just really solid. It’s my favorite s2 episode. If you ask me if I want to rewatch Riposte, the answer is always yes. 10/10. We stan.

7.     Gorizilla- Okay, so this episode has some solid Adrinette in it, but the real reason it ranks so high is that fucking Ladrien trust fall. I stare at that scene for hours, you guys. HOURS. It is absolutely just *chefs kiss*. Sometimes when I need a pick-me-up, I just go watch gifs of that catch on loop. 10/10. Beautiful. Radiant. Carefree.

8.     Gang of Secrets- I have been keeping most of my opinions to myself about s4 (mostly because I’ve backed way the hell out of this fandom), but GoS was pretty solid. Gotta say, it’s the first episode in a long time with this show that made me actually excited to see what happens next. Most other episodes I was like, okay, that was cute. The show is still meh overall. But GoS really got me like oh shit, is ML good again? 10/10 for making me feel things again.

9.     Oblivio- Told you guys this one was probably rated higher than I thought. Oblivio is just really fun. There is good Adrinette. That “No wonder I fell in love with you” paired with the softest of Adrien smiles just sends me. And the kisses. The unquestionable trust. These two kids literally woke up together alone in an elevator with no memories and said welp, you’re my boyfriend/girlfriend obviously, I don’t make the rules. Honestly, how anyone could argue that these two dorks aren’t made for each other after that episode is beyond me. 9/10

10.  Backwarder- Okay, I know I am weird and alone for this one, but I really liked this episode. It got a lot of shit for the constipation capsule thing at the end, but like who cares? We finally got some more backstory on Fu. He got a love-interest who is dope as hell. This episode is my favorite lucky charm use ever. Like that queen DID that. I like Backwarder, guys! Fuck off. 9/10.

11.  Kwamibuster- We all know I am a Marinette-stan by this point, but our girl was SHINING this episode. This bitch said gimme all them and let me go whoop this bitch’s ass, and she DID. Hawkmoth could never. Multimouse is a gift, and Marinette is a boss ass queen.  9/10

12.  Chat Blanc- Listen, this episode was very good. I enjoy the idea of my children being happy in another timeline somewhere very much. We got all 4 sides of the square in an episode. It’s just really solid. I know this is the fandom’s favorite, and everyone is gonna shit their pants because it didn’t make my top 10, but this is my list. So, I put it at number 12. It’s good. I like it. It just didn’t steal my wallet like other episodes did. Put the pitchforks down. It’s gonna be okay, you can still love it more than me. 8/10

13.  New York Special- I know everyone felt some type of way about this special, but I wasn’t mad at it. My perception of it might be clouded because I watched it in Disney World where I was chilling and having a great time, but like this special really did somethings for me. The Adrinette was top tier. Tippy top tier. Even though they hurt us in the end, I am okay with it because it just means the children will grow and come out stronger. I don’t care if it’s not technically canon. Ask me if I give a fuck. I don’t. I had fun here. 8/10. Solid.

14.  The Collector- This one might shock a lot of you, but let me paint you a scene. It’s the first episode of s2. We have just come off a 2 year hiatus. The fandom is thriving. We’re hungry for canon content. We have hopes and dreams and expectations. Everyone is going wild with theories. This episode confirmed something that was long since obvious (in my opinion) and ended the stupid arguments people had been having. It made Gabriel actually seem semi-competent. We got our first taste of how Chat/Adrien will react to his dad being Hawkmoth. We got a peek at their life. Adrien’s isolation and sadness. They were so close to figuring it out. The battle was epic. Like Collector really had them on the ropes there for a second. It’s a solid episode, yall. I’m not wrong. Hate me all you want, but this episode brought it. 8/10

15.  Despair Bear- Is this episode up this high because of the Adrinette slow dance scene? YOU BET YOUR ASS IT IS. Okay, but fr though, shipping aside, this episode gave us hope that Chloe was actually gonna redeem herself. I mean, she didn’t but, we didn’t know that at the time. Seeing her run around trying to be nice was fun. And then she actually did something good, and we had a moment of okay, she’s capable. We’ll get there. We didn’t. But what a ride this episode was for making us think she would. 8/10

16.  Startrain- Cat, you’re just ranking all the Adrinette episodes highest. And? What of it? Are you surprised? You clicked a blog that has simping for Adrinette in the description, and you’re surprised all my favorite episodes have Adrinette? I’m not wrong, you’re just an idiot. The Adrinette nap cuddles aside though, this was a pretty good episode. If you don’t think too hard about the whole space thing, we got a look at Max’s life, his mom is a driven, smart lady doing her best. Adrien rebels against papa for once. Alya stops a Lila scheme. Chloe gets to play the hero. Alya and Nino actually investigate like the heroes they are. Gabriel gets to realize what a dumbass bitch he is. I mean. Guys. Startrain is solid. 7.5/10

17.  Sapotis- This one shot up in rank for me after GoS, but tbh it’s always been a solid episode. Alyanette sleepover? Check. Alya becoming a superhero? Check. It’s a fun episode. And looking back, it’s nicely called back to later in GoS. We love it. 7.5/10

18.  Sandboy- Idk why I enjoy this episode as much as I do, but I do. Sandboy is a cute bean. I love his aesthetic. We also get hilarious looks at everyone’s nightmares. “Plagg, who turned you into a sock?” cracks me up cause like Adrien, bby, no XD And Chat Noir’s nightmare. I think it would have been interesting though if since Sandboy dusted the Agreste mansion, if we got a peek at Hawkmoth’s nightmares. It would have been a nice hint of plot to go along with Master Fu’s nightmare. Also Plagg giving the akuma the slip like the clever boy we know he is deep down? 7.5/10

19.  Furious Fu- If you guys haven’t realized by now that I love Fu, idk what you’re doing. Pay attention. I know that some people don’t like him, but I’m just gonna say it, you’re wrong. Fu took care of the Miracle Box for over 100 years, and this episode kind of gives some insight to what the Order was like. Very strict. Lots of rules. And ya know what, Fu said fuck the police, I’m gonna befriend these little magical demigods, and fuck off! Like what an absolute legend. I was really happy to see him living his best life, and that he and Marianne got married because it’s what he deserves. We love to see it. 7.5/10

20.  Gamer- People like to shit on Marinette in this episode, but like honestly, if I were in her shoes, I’d have probably done the same thing if I had the skill. Ain’t nothing wrong with a girl trying to spend time with the boy she likes. And Tom and Sabine being absolute shipping trash. I love them. And the awkward Adrinette. The introduction of the lucky charm that Adrien STILL carries. Wholesome. This was a good episode for their friendship, and we love to see it. 7.5/10

21.  Christmaster- Okay, I know a lot of people hated this episode when it aired, but I thought it was really funny? Everyone skidding around in the ice rink was hilarious. If you don’t take this episode seriously, it’s really fun. Chris is pretty cute, and damn right Ladybug is the best kid in the world. Idk. This episode is fun. I’m not mad at it. Sue me. 7.5/10

22.  Weredad- What? Another MC-heavy episode in Cat’s top 30? Listen, I don’t hate canon MC. The fans just annoy me. This episode was funny. The secondhand embarrassment and cringe was real. Plagg taunting Adrien because he knows the secret was great. Marinette being a self-saving queen was great. It’s a good episode. I like MC, you guys. I do. I swear! 7.5/10

23.  Miraculer- This episode was interesting to me, and I think it’s still a good development episode. For one, Sabrina finally got her own akuma episode named after her. Secondly, because it’s a big step for Chloe, just not in the way we expected. It totally makes sense that Chloe can’t have her Miraculous back because literally everyone knows her identity. Can’t argue that logic. And she is the first person to ever refuse to become akumatized, so like mad respect. I know a lot of people had high hopes for redeemed Chloe (myself included), but I think watching a character fall from revering someone to hating them is also an interesting path. The friends to enemies arc as it were. Idk. I liked this episode. It was an opportunity for Chloe to grow, even if she didn’t in the end, but we’ll talk about that later. 7.5/10

24.  Lady Wifi- I like Alya. I feel like I don’t say that much, and people make some assumptions because of MDCSP, but MDCSP is just a concept I wanted to explore. It doesn’t really reflect how I feel about any one character. Except maybe Lila. And Gabe. But every other spite fic I’ve written branching from Chameleon, the class has been fine. Alya has been fine. So, let it be known that I like Alya. Lady Wifi was a fun episode. Putting aside the fact that she thought Chloe was Ladybug for no reason, I like her akuma. I like the interactions we get with LadyNoir in this episode. After GoS, this episode gets a bit funnier. It’s solid. 7/10

25.  Dark Cupid- I don’t have much to say about this one. LadyNoir. That’s it. That’s the tweet. Send it. 7/10

26.  Volpina- So many things about this episode. It introduced a new antagonist who we didn’t exactly 100% know was going to be an antagonist at the time. This episode sparked a lot of fun fan theories for a while. Who was Lila? How was she going to shake things up? Not to mention this episode gave us a taste of plot and lore, and set up Marinette meeting Master Fu officially. Lots of intrigue sparked from this episode. And that LadyNoir door scene? OOOOOO 7/10

27.  Hearthunter- One word: Adrigaminette. This episode was so cute for them! I loved seeing them all goofing and running around together. Adrien and Kagami being absolutely in love with Marinette when her hair is down. They both love her, I don’t make the rules. Not to mention, Marinette takes a big step by letting her friends be happy without her. Kagami not wanting to hurt Marinette. The drama!! Gabriel being a messy ass bitch to his friends. It loses points for the abomination of an akuma, but overall, I wasn’t too mad at it. Yet. 7/10

28.  Glaciator- More MC in Cat’s top 30? It’s more likely than you think. Listen. Listen… Listen. MC is fine. This episode was the closest thing to fanfiction that we got. The balcony scene was really sweet. I was drinking the irony. We got introduced to Andre the icecream fraud. Andre the please just give me the flavor I asked for man. I could have done without Chat pouting, but the LadyNoir in the end was pretty good. I wish they’d done more with Ladybug’s feelings for Chat. Had her question herself a bit more after this one, but overall, it’s cute. 7/10

29.  Zombizou- A lot of people started hating Mlle. Bustier after this episode, and like I can kind of see it, if I squint, but I did not draw that same conclusion from this episode. Mlle. Bustier just wants good things for all of her students. They’re 14 ffs, she just wants to be a good influence on all of her students and wants them all to be successful. But go off, I guess? Plus, this episode was basically just a spoof on zombie apocalypse movies. We got so many things. Julerose, Myvan, DJWifi. Chloe actually showing some depth and emotion. LadyNoir. We won this episode, babes. Sorry you didn’t get the memo. 7/10

30.  Timetagger- Okay. This is the last episode in the ones that I’d venture to call “good.” Number 30. I enjoyed Timetagger. I know people have feelings about timey-wimey bullshit, and like I’m not gonna lie and say I’m thrilled with it either (I mean, I changed the rabbit’s power in MDCSP) but that being said, Timetagger was so sassy. Bunnix was cool as hell. We get to see that LB and CN are still doing the thing in the future. So many questions sparked from this episode. It was fun. Idk. I liked it. That’s all I got. 7/10

31.  Malediktator- Okay, from this point on, less comments because this is the section that are more or less just meh to me. Like they’re fine. This episode was fine. Chloe was fine. Chat playing with the laser was cute. 6.5/10

32.  Mayura- Adrien’s speech at the end. Nuff said 6.5/10

33.  Ikari Gozen- Ryuko/Ryuuko. Gals being pals. 6.5/10

34.  Reflekdoll- I talked about this earlier, but I don’t hate this episode. It’s not as bad as people make it out to be. Sue me. 6.5/10

35.  Anansi- Nino is the goodest boy. Also I need more of the gang taking Adrien on adventures via Facetime. Stat. 6.5/10

36.  Shanghai- This one is new, and tbh I still haven’t watched it with subs, but I had a good time. Fei was cute. The boy squad was cute. Adrien bonding with Great Uncle Cheng was cute. Hawkmoth getting literally dunked on was *chefs kiss* 6.5/10

37.  Gigantitan- I love overly supportive, ride-or-die girl squad. 6.5/10

38.  Party Crasher- Idk why this episode was funny to me. Kim is the purest bean. We don’t deserve him. 6.5/10

39.  Desperada- This episode was an emotional roller coaster, and even though we all collectively hate Aspik’s stupid egghead, we love the Ladrien this episode provided us. 6/10

40.  Oni-chan- Listen, I loved seeing Lila get a tiny bit of karma even if she made it up in the end. I loved Chat going off on her. I loved seeing her get outsmarted in the end. 6/10

41.  Frightningale- My good lesbian Clara Nightingale. We stan. 6/10

42.  Style Queen- I like Audrey in a “she’s the worst person I’ve ever met, I want to travel the world with her” kind of way. She’s funny to me. Idk. I love her firing everyone. She’s the one I love to hate. She’s the worst, but we love her for it. Plus this episode gave us Plagg’s adorable little Cataclysm that destroyed half the city. 6/10

43.  Gamer 2.0- Chat confidently strutting in heels made this episode worth it. And we get to see the beginning of Marinette being overwhelmed. Plus it was the return of gamer!nette. 6/10

44.  Troublemaker- I don’t hate this episode as much as the next person either. It was fine. Jagged is a manchild, but we love him for it. He’s a Marinette stan which like mood. The Adrinette at the end was cute. I wasn’t mad at it. Idk. It’s fine. 6/10

45.  Reflekta- Where are all my Juleka stans at? I loved the LadyNoir banter in this ep. V. cute. 6/10

46.  Dark Owl- This episode was fun. And it really shows their level of trust. Plus Plagg and Tikki interacted. 6/10

47.  Timebreaker- Have I ever mentioned that I like Alix? I like Alix. 6/10

48.  Silencer- I don’t hate this episode as much as you’d expect me to, and that is 100% because of the LadyNoir. 5.5/10

49.  Prime Queen- Chat purrs. 5.5/10

50.  Syren- I think the fish power-up is adorable. Ondine is a gem. Kim is a pure bean, but we been knew. 5.5/10

51.  Befana- I like Gina, but this episode fell flat for me. Almost as flat as the animation. 5.5/10

52.  Reverser- Another episode that everyone hates that I am actually fine with. This episode made me like Nathaniel more. Probably because I was previously indifferent toward him. Marc is cute too. 5.5/10

53.  Mr. Pigeon- Marinette is one clever girl. And the Adrinette hand-touch. 5.5/10

54.  Felix- Felix is a gremlin of chaos. A true chaotic neutral. He gives his uncle the finger, and I think that’s beautiful. 5.5/10

55.  Truth- Bet you expected this episode to be higher. While I did enjoy watching toxic people’s world crumble, this episode still gets a meh from me dog. 5/10

56.  Lies- The Adrigami was cute, and I respect Kagami as a character. The akuma could have been better tho. 5/10

57.  Princess Fragrance- Not much to say here. 5/10

58.  Copycat- 5/10

59.  Bubbler- 5/10

60.  Mime- 5/10

61.  Animan- 5/10

62.  Robostus- 5/10

63.  Ladybug- This episode ranks this low purely because I don’t care about GabeNath, and I hate that Lila won something in the end. But Adrien saying I won’t hesitate, bitch! At the end was nice to see. 5/10

64.  Catalyst- I know I ranked Mayura way higher, but Catalyst fell flat for me. Like it was fine. Wasn’t as into it though. 4.5/10

65.  Puppeteer- One of my favorite lucky charm uses. 4.5/10

66.  Pixelator- My favorite Cataclysm. 4.5/10

67.  Horrificator- That almost-Adrinette kiss tho 4.5/10

68.  Pharaoh- 4.5/10

69.  Kung Food- 4.5/10

70.  Rogercop- 4/10

71.  Guitar Villain- 4/10

72.  Dark Blade- 4/10

73.  Bakerix- 4/10

74.  Antibug- And now onto the bottom 10. To start us off, I will just say: UGH, this episode annoyed me. First of all, Sabrina didn’t even get her own episode. Chloe was a piece of shit. Idk why they made Ladybug the one in the wrong when Chloe was being obnoxious. Ugh. 3/10

75.  Captain Hardrock- I’m gonna be honest. My apathy for this episode has grown into loathing. Toxic stans are 100% to blame. Birthday ruining, bitches. This is the reason I threw a breakup bash after Truth. Yall deserved it. 3/10

76.  Christmas Special- I didn’t hate this episode as much as everyone, but it still wasn’t great. 2.5/10

77.  Stormy Weather 2.0- This episode was really dumb. It didn’t need to exist. 2.0/10

78.  Queen Wasp- Why did we give Chloe a Miraculous after this episode? 2/10

79.  Animaestro- Did we really need a self-insert? Did we really? 2/10

80.  Puppeteer 2.0- Listen, this episode would have made more sense in s1 or at the very latest early s2. Adrien gave a whole ass speech on how great Marinette is, then he turns around and is like idk if she likes me… Clean it up. 2/10

81.  Miracle Queen- I could talk at length about how much I hate the ending of this episode and what they did with Chloe and Master Fu, but we’re just going to remain calm and give it a solid 1.5/10

82.  Frozer- This episode made no goddamn sense. I call bullshit on so many things. Just ugh. 1/10

83.  Chameleon- Surprisingly, even though this episode sparked many, many spite fics out of me, it’s not my least favorite because at least Ladybug semi-redeemed this episode. Still really dumb and ooc tho. 1/10

84.  Feast- Okay, okay, okay, here we are. Bottom of the barrel. Cat’s most hated episode, and you wanna know why? You want to know why this episode fills me with the rage? Because we spent two fucking seasons building up all this mystery and lore and intrigue surrounding Fu’s big mistake, and they dropped the fucking ball! They did my mans so dirty! They could have really deepened his character, deepened the Order, deepened anything other than whatever fucking affair Gabriel and Nathalie have going on, but NO. They made it some stupid, bland-ass thing that got resolved magically in the end, then just ignored it for the rest of the season. I will never not be salty about how they did my boy Fu in this show. I’m happy he found his peace, but fuck if I’m not livid about how they did it. Whatever. Chat being done with Ladybug’s shit when they’re about to get eaten was funny I guess. .5/10

#cat speaks #cat spoils #episode ranking #long post #i'm tired now #i go to bed

[supercorp-hosie]

My thoughts for Legacies 314:

1) Clarke!!! I like his air of cockiness when he do all this things, and especially when Hope break this air😂😂😂 I think since the show is constantly letting him show up like this, maybe at some point he will eventually turn up or be brought back by my Sowanby team? Oh my Holarke heart! I just love their dynamic like how I’m entertained by Lizdon dynamics🤣🤣

2) I still see that artifact that was broken because of Landon unnecessary move, why? I thought the arc was over? It’s just hilarious when Clark tried so hard to break it, even using explosives, but Landon just break it by throwing it to the monster😂 these brothers, I can’t 😂 (I know it’s because of the presence of Cleo, but still, funny!)

3) Okay, the way Hope just ended up with Wade, doing a drama about undying teenage love, I can’t imagine 🤣🤣 sorry Hope, but Wade can be a good teammate. And Wade has a last name - Rivers! Congrats! Poor Jed, another person that’s appear later than him and got a last name.

4) I just inevitably thought about the other witch Gaby, and relates back to Penelope😆. What if Penelope comes back and starts a war with Finch, that would be fun🤣 I can imagine they somehow would have to work together to protect Josie if something happens to her. They can look past that because they both care for Josie so much. Penelope/Josie/Finch anyone? (I’m secretly shipping Penelope and Finch too in my head, OMG can you imagine the volcano erupting? Enemies to lovers trope??)

5) Finally SBS has a teacher other than Alaric now.

6) I do think that the compelling works. Anyway, considering what’s going to happen, I’m certain that somehow Ethan is going to remember what happened with MG. If he’s going to be a supernatural, I’m rooting for vampire. We are really lacking vampires here.

7) I love Hope’s magical surges♥️ and how other students is taking that like it’s a normal thing around them. Unlike the school tour.

8) I love Hope needn’t to turn around to know that it’s Josie right away♥️ and Josie do catch up things around Hope when she’s not around after she returns.

9) Josie lied to Hope that Lizzie needs help(even though it turns out to be true doesn’t mean she didn’t lie), to help Hope with her mental state. Is this toxic or supportive?? Maybe I should just count it separately?

10) The twins clothes!! Contrast colours, love them!

11) I wonder who drove there....Hope didn’t have a dl in s1 (but two years has past now?) while in 307, Josie apparently walked to Mystic Grill to find Finch(but Lizzie did drive before in s2)....so? I bet it’s Hope...but how the hell did they even have time for driving education?

12) Hope, looking at Josie: like I said, trap. 😂😂but she just doesn’t even get mad at Josie?? Exactly how many times did she let Josie escape like that?? Poor Landon got grilled when he lied😂

13) We don’t worry about dick here🤣🤣🤣🤣

14) I love Finch just confidently stand up for herself, challenging Jed. But no, I don’t like Jed being thrown down by a new wolf again. But having female alpha is appealing too, I love to see that when Finch challenge the old system, then get to improve the abusive hierarchy towards the omega/new wolf in the pack. I was conflicted. I love how they resolved the issue in the end! It’s win-win situation and I love how Jed and Finch bond! Brotp/Sistp! And I love that from Finch perspective, we can see that the wolves let Jed win because they love Jed as much because they know Jed cares about them a lot and just willing to let him win. Not because Jed was oppressing them.

15) Btw, I can’t believe they are using pool/billiards/snooker to decide who becomes the alpha. Really I just don’t like how it works, like leading a pack is a game. But some wolves are born alpha. In real life, a pack’s alpha is always the one to lead hunting, be vigilant of any threat that can harm the pack, they really care for their packs, like Jed. Whilst there’s this beta position in the pack, they recognise the alpha’s leadership, help the alpha keeping others in line, help take care of other members too. Just like what I’d imagined, Finch can fit the beta position very well, for the time being, because of their dynamics. I’m not saying that Finch doesn’t fit as alpha, I think that beta always has the potential to be the alpha of a pack. I just love that now the dynamics in the pack somehow really resembles how the social hierarchy of a pack of wolves in real life.

16) appreciation to Finch being badass at pool/snooker/billiards

17) when Andy just called Hope’s name, why don’t the trio be surprised? It’s not like they even meet before?

18) when MG showed up, I just immediately believe in him. Love that Alaric defended him. I understand Dorian though, he’s always sensitive of rippers as his family was butchered by one. Please don’t blame him too much. MG living in a cave breaks my heart, I just recalled that Hope was homeless when she’s out of Malivore too! Double heart breaks.

19) MG diaries! I’m so proud of him, even Alaric validates his effort and his kind heart! I just rewatched 106 last night to do some fact checking for my hosie interactions 2.0 and twins relationships 1.0. MG has always wanted to be a superhero that saves lives. He has grown so much, from first fighting zombies, to super squad fighting monster, until now, saving normal people lives. I bet now Penelope can’t laugh at him when he first pitched his feelings to Penelope. Good job!

20) I’ve talked about the Finsie sitting together, so I only want to talk about how the relationship between Finsie is healthy for one another (for now, and at least they are not cringy for these two episode).They function independently and Finch doesn’t need to constantly worry about Josie all the time, like what Penelope fear of. Ofc it may also because that the twins have grown healthier.

21) even though Hosie were mind controlled, I just love how they have unspoken understanding between each other😂 Josie doesn’t need to tell Hope to make Lizzie stay with them to have Hope “as sonnum” Lizzie. Then only Josie said “stay with us”.

22) Hizzie hugs, and HOPE ANDREA MIKAELSON 🤣

23) I just love how Lizzie knows what to say to break Josie’s peace, while Josie knows how to break Hope’s peace. I see another spoken parallel from 308 about blindspot😂 Lizzie -> Josie -> Hope.

24) so if the drug sometimes doesn’t work on Lizzie, that means that there are times that Lizzie is really blue! Really at peace! I’m so proud and happy for her! Go Lizzie!

25) “ALL I WANTED FOR YOU IS YOUR HAPPINESS” this is so powerful! My Hosie heart! And really the last painful sentence, is fact. I’m sad for Hope because she’s so into that relationship until she can’t bring herself to do it and only leads to Landon leaving, but it’s also classic Mikaelsons(I feel), never giving up for their love ones. Appreciation to Landon, but still it’s strike three for leaving, please don’t let them be together again. It’s derogatory to Hope’s self-esteem.

26) I love badass Hope so much!! All the bodies she left! If I’m not already gay, she would have bent me into a mosquito coil by that scene, (so bent that I can’t be straight anymore). I love how Josie just let Hope outing her anger on these witches, freeze Andy, waited patiently for Lizzie and Hope to deal with Andy together.

27) I died laughing at these Pandemonium 🤣🤣🤣🤣 the badass trio in panda suit😂😂😂😂 I can’t! They’re so cute! And the height difference🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

28) How Hope tries to focus and dead serious in dealing with the upcoming monster but fails inevitably and miserably at Josie’s antics! All Josie does is laughing cutely at Hope and poking(?) her.

29) I love the trio so much!

30) haven’t watched any Star Wars, so I really thought that the one in the mask was Clarke until the Star Wars theme song started😫 too bad that Landon must have missed it.

31) Lizzie kissing Ethan is the last thing ever to have crossed my mind, so again, what the fuck?(sorry, language)

32) when I first thought about team building, I was thinking about finch + MG + Jed + Kaleb, but pack bonding, I’m satisfied too.

#legacies #legacies spoilers #hope mikaelson #josie saltzman #lizzie saltzman #jed legacies #hosie #milton greasley #wade legacies #wade rivers #finch tarrayo #ethan machado #alaric saltzman #dorian williams #finsie #hizzie #Penelope park #Penelope x Finch #lizdon #holarke

[beyscape]

The Intern - 1

Andy Barber x Reader

Summary: Being Andy’s intern meant you got to spend more time by his side more than anyone. This was fine, however, until feelings got in the way and made things complicated

Warnings: Age gap, technically cheating, swearing and stuff

Word Count: 2.9k

A/N Spoilers as it progresses! I’ve not read the book and only saw the first two episodes so if you haven’t seen episodes 1 and 2, what are you waiting for go watch them! I’m putting the reader around 26 and Andy around 40.

Chapter 1   Chapter 2   Chapter 3   Chapter 4   Chapter 5

 02:37 am

You sighed at the clock, slightly feeling cheated that only 9 minutes had passed since you last checked it, when it felt like it should have been hours. Sipping at the now cold coffee you bought from the vending machine down the hall, you leaned back in your chair. You had been staring at the mountain of paper scattered around your desk for hours now, yet it didn’t seem like you were able to make a dent into it. It sat there, almost mocking you; you scowled at it.

The office was dark and empty, it had been for some time now as the last person had left sometime after the clock stroke 10 pm. Without the occasional whistling of the night guard patrolling the building, you seemed totally alone. Not just physically too, you felt like you had no one with you, supporting you. Your gaze drifted to the big desk left unoccupied behind the glass wall. Andy Barber, the plaque on the desk read, right next to the messy pen holder and another mountain of paperwork, almost identical to the one you had on your desk. Great, you thought, they could mock you both. Even the pile of paper had someone. You rubbed your eyes as even your thoughts stopped making much sense.

You were tired.

It had been two weeks now that Andy was forced to take a paid leave, following the arrest warrant for his son. Fourteen days. Then why the hell did it feel like fourteen months?

Being Andy’s intern was something you simply loved. You were excited and eager to do your job, straight out of a prestigious law school you had gotten such a good job, so of course you were fresh and happy to please your bosses and wanting to make a great career for yourself by learning from some of the very best. At least, that’s how it started almost a year ago. You had heard of Andy’s name, followed some of his cases as he was one of the best district attorney’s of the whole East Coast. The job wasn’t easy by any means, even though he was a kind man he would never go easy on you about your job. You liked that air of professionalism he carried around him though, it seemed as if he was good at everything he did.

He was incredibly smart, funny, kind, not to mention downright gorgeous, and he would always look at you with such emotion in his eyes that you couldn’t help but feel your heart jump a little every time he gave you one of his deep looks. So, it was an understatement to say you had a crush on him. It was impossible not to! That’s how you tried to comfort yourself in those late-night hours when you were up from tossing and turning and all you could think of was how his lips would taste on yours. It was just a simple, tiny crush that you couldn’t do anything about. Aside from obstacles such as the age gap between you and him technically being your boss there was also the matter of him being married. You had met his family on a couple of occasions, they had seemed like the perfect little American family. No matter how deep your feelings ran, you knew you couldn’t possibly be the reason for breaking apart a family.

It was just a tiny crush anyways.

Your mind drifted to Andy, how his once bright and sharp eyes now seemed tired and the bags forming under his eyes made him look older than he was. It was funny how two weeks can change a man’s life so drastically.

Defending Jacob wasn’t an easy job, what with so many in the office believing that he was responsible with the murder of Ben. You thought of Jacob, images of him visiting Andy in the office sometimes after school flashed in your mind, and how he would shyly smile at you when you offered him some candy or asked about his classes. You just didn’t think that a boy like him could be the murderer. You wanted to catch the actual murderer and put an end to this whole ordeal so that maybe, hopefully things would go back to normal. You had forgotten what normal even was in those two frantic weeks.

You didn’t need to pull such long hours at the office, in fact if Neil found out he would probably make a sly remark about it, but you wanted to. You wanted to catch a murderer and make sure a teenage boy didn’t go to prison over a crime he didn’t commit, but more than those you wanted to help Andy.

You thought of the times he would smile at you, thanking you for your hard work. “I have no idea what I would do without you, Y/N,” he had once said, the words still burning bright in your memory, “I can’t even remember how things were before you came in and started your internship.” His gaze was so intense at that point, his blue eyes so deep you thought you would drown in them if you stared for too long, his smile so relaxed and curved to the one side, his hands playing with the end of his tie he had loosened moments ago, he was everything you had ever wanted and some more. You had lowered your gaze back then, a bashful smile appearing on your heated face. Oh, how you wished you were back at that diner he had taken you out to celebrate after a long and tiresome case.

A sad smile played on your face as you reflected on the many memories you had made in the passing year, all of them equally leaving you flustered. You were so wrapped up in your thoughts however, you didn’t hear the footsteps approaching your part of the floor. Your head snapped as movement entered your peripheral vision, sending a dull ache down your neck sore from slumping over your desk for hours. It was too dark for you to see the face of the person approaching, but you knew him well enough to recognize him just from his silhouette.

Your mouth fell open ever so slightly, your heart picking up its speed as he made his way towards you. What was he doing here at three in the morning on a Tuesday night? He wasn’t even supposed to be allowed in the building! Despite these thoughts and many more swirling through your head, there was one main thought blaring in your mind: you missed him very much. You had seen him around town of course, but it was only here and there and in the passing. Neil had made it very clear that you weren’t to see Andy as “it would create a conflict of interest” he had claimed. You knew though deep down it was because Neil hated Andy’s guts and was probably happy to have him out of the office.

He finally walked close enough that the light of your desk lamp washed over his tired features, you noted the way his hair was a mess spiking up in different directions as if he had been tossing and turning restlessly in bed. He wasn’t wearing his usual work attire, those suits you loved seeing him in, and instead was in a pair of grey sweatpants and a simple hoodie on top. Your gaze shifted back to his face where surprise now gleamed in his eyes along with something else you couldn’t quite place.

“Y/N?” He said and momentarily all you could think of was how much you loved the way your name rolled off of his tongue.

“What are you doing here so late?” He asked as he stopped right in front of your desk, hands casually in his pockets. He didn’t need an answer however as his laid on the paperwork you had sitting in front of you, going page after page about him and more specifically his son’s involvement with the murder case.

“I see. That asshole Neal keeping you here all night? You look like you need some rest.” He remarked with a darkened, displeased look in his eyes. You shook your head, wanting to explain, to say so much, yet never finding the right words.

“I’m here because I want to, Neal has nothing to do with it. I wanna figure out a way to prove Jake’s innocence, to see if we maybe missed something. I don’t believe he did it.” You replied with a fierce passion, your words breaking the silence engulfing the whole building.

“That makes the two of us.” He smiled at that for a briefly, then seemed to catch himself. He frowned, almost feeling guilty for smiling. Your heart panged.

“How about you Mr. Barber? You really are not supposed to be here.”

“How many times have I told you to call me Andy? Kingston was at night shift, told him I forgot to grab some of my personal stuff I needed. And he let me in.” He scratched the back of his neck, slightly swaying on his heels.

“No offense but if Kingston’s just letting people in maybe he needs a little talk.” You teased him, wishing to see him smile once again. He didn’t, but you could easily read the amusement in his eyes. You had spent too long by his side, watching him, to miss those little things.

“You wanna take a walk? Clear your head a little. I know I need that.” He asked in response, surprising both you and himself.

“What about those personal stuff you needed to grab?” You shuffled on your feet to pull on your coat, hoping it would be enough to brace you against the chill of the night.

“Nah, I honestly didn’t know what to do or where to go, one thing I knew was I needed to get out of that house. Next thing I know, I’m in front of the building. Figured I’d try my chance at getting inside. But now that I’ve ran into you, my night’s a bit better.” He motioned towards the door with his head, his hair swaying slightly in the same direction, “Let’s go.”

The elevator ride and the couple of minutes it took to walk through the building was spent in silence aside from Kingston wishing you both a good night at the front security desk, as if you both didn’t know what to say or how to start a conversation. In that same silence you walked towards the park close to the tall grey building you had left moments ago, shivering against the cold of three a.m.

“So,” you started after minutes of silence, not being able to take it any longer, “do you wanna talk about it?” You hugged your arms around your body, tucking your already cold hands.

“It’s just,” he sighed and rolled his shoulders, almost as if trying to drop some of the weight he was carrying, “it’s crazy how fast everything went to shit. He didn’t do it, Y/N, I know my son. And they are ruining his life just like that. I can’t believe all of this and there is nothing I can do as I watch them ruin my son’s future so easily, just like that.” He rubbed his forehead, wishing for things to go back to normal, just as you. You both knew that normal was a long memory now, things could never go back to the way they were. Not entirely.

“I’m so sorry you are going through all this, Mr. Barber. Neither you nor Jake deserve this.” You let out a sigh matching his, desperately wanting to comfort the man who haunted every waking thought you had, yet finding yourself unable to as you glanced at the ring shining on his finger under the orange-ish street lights.

“How many times have I told you to call me Andy?” He turned his gaze to you now, you swallowed.

“More than I can remember the number of, Mr. Barber.” You gave him a cautious smile, unable to hold it in. Your heart swell with happiness as he snorted at your last remark, a soft look on his face as he took you in. You bit your lip before speaking again.

“How is Laurie?” You had to know. Damn your hands which ached to hold him, damn whatever may stand between you, you wanted to take action and do something as the urge, the need to close the distance between you got stronger and stronger. To do that, however, you had to know.

Andy flinched slightly at the mention of his wife, as if he didn’t expect for you to bring her up. Or like he even forgot that he had a wife. A bitter, short laugh escaped his lips as he ruefully examined the sliver band on his finger.

“Laurie is… Laurie. We are fighting again.” He raised his gaze to meet your eyes. You were caught off guard, you raised an eyebrow at the word ‘again’. He continued when you said nothing.

“We have been having some problems, we even had counselling a while ago. Laurie was always so keen about wanting to keep it quiet and locked away, and we tried it for Jake’s sake. Coming from a broken home type of situation, I wanted to try for Jake. These two weeks however, things have been really bad, on top of everything. This whole thing brought back a ton of unresolved bitterness from years ago. I never told anyone that.” He looked at you as if he was seeing you under a new light, his shoulders stood higher and more relaxed. A warm feeling spread in you as he confided in you things he never muttered to another soul, you smiled at him softly, his eyes drawing you in and spinning your head.

“I’m so sorry, Andy.” Was all you needed to say as you lay a delicate hand on his arm, the gentleness in your eyes surprising him and make him feel things he got the taste of so long ago.

One look at the hand you lay on his arm and another at your face, and Andy found himself to be in trouble. He already was, don’t get him wrong, his life seemed to be a magnet for all things bad and problematic at the moment. This, however, was a new kind of trouble as he looked at his intern, this young girl who had diligently followed him for a whole year and always seemed to know exactly what he needed. Before he knew what he was doing, he closed the distance between you with two small steps, and now was so close that you were too afraid to breathe, scared that even the smallest of moves would fully erase the very little gap left between your lips.

Despite your whole body feeling as if you were thrown into a scorching flame and every inch of your skin itching to get even closer, you waited, staring into his eyes with slightly raised eyebrows and hooded eyes. Your mouth was barely open and so was his, you were so close that every time he ruggedly breathed you felt his hot breath caress your lips.

“Fuck,” he whispered before giving in and closing the distance after a painful minute, placing those soft lips you had spent hours fantasizing about on yours. There was nothing gentle with his kiss, getting more and more heated and frantic as if he was a man needing cold water after spending his whole life walking around the desert.

You whimpered against his kiss as Andy’s one hand wrapped around your waist and the other finding your neck, pulling you towards him with no more distance to cover. You were so entangled with each other in the dark, it was hard to tell where one body ended and the other started. Placing one last, this time gentler kiss on your lips, he rested his head against your forehead, his eyes for closed as he breathed a deep breath.

“Oh Y/N,” he said, his voice strained and barely above a whisper, “what are we going to do, baby girl?”

You had no answer for him, a mess of emotions after the kiss that you felt your knees wouldn’t be able to hold you for much longer. So, you clung on Andy, his tense and broad shoulders feeling like they could carry you for as long as you needed, just as Andy’s hands clung on your waist, holding you close to his chest, his forehead still laying against yours.

In the park next to the towering building you both belonged to, you stood together some time after three. The chilly wind making its way into your lungs did nothing against the heat you felt all over your body, not cooling down one bit. In that park, in the safety of the shadows and the quiet of the town, you were safe. Not a defense attorney and his intern, just two people desperately needing to hold each other, too frightened to let go and face the world.

As the clock showed a little past 3 in the morning, you and Andy were safe in the dimly lit park, unaware how much that would change so very soon.

------------------------------------------------------

There you have it folks! I’m so so whipped for this man. Make sure to follow me so you don’t miss the other chapters! My inbox is open for requests, feedback or just to scream about Chris Evans! :P 

#andy barber #andy barber x reader #defending jacob #andy barber x you #andy barber x y/n #chris evans #cevans #chris evans x reader #defending jacob fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #andy barber fanfiction #andy barber imagine #chris evans imagine

[chalkrevelations]

OK, Word of Honor, Episode 9, and I know last time I got deep in the weeds about symbolism, but this week, I’m getting back to basics and rambling on (and on) about what this show is really about: Zhou Zishou and Wen Kexing and their relationship.

First, though, the usual warning: SPOILERS. Not just for this episode, but potentially for the entire show, so drive past and circle back around later if you want to watch all 36.5 eps unspoiled.

Bear with me on this one, because this ep spends a LOT of time on ZZS and WKX, and I think a lot of that time is ZZS making some Monumental Life Decisions, including how he’s going to proceed in this relationship and how he’s going to approach his life moving forward. But I’m finding myself needing to work through it chronologically, and it’s. A Lot. Also, let’s face it, ZZS has been my ride-or-die at least since he dropped to his knees and started disrobing in the middle of the throne room in Ep 1, so a chance to wallow in his emotional journey is a chance I’m gonna take.

So, we do have a brief opener when we find out Dead Guy who the Yueyang disciple was shrieking about at the end of the last ep is Fang Buzhi, AKA the Nine Clawed Fox, the guy who lifted WKX’s (Danyang) Glazed Armor (along with some replicas). He got got by mysterious somebodies in the previous episode, and we find out now that he has three tiny needles in his neck, which ZZS recognizes as a Tian Chuang technique. This leads ZZS to 1) assume it must have been Han Ying who did it, so the (Danyang) Glazed Armor is now in the hands of Tian Chuang, and 2) realize that maybe this is not the best place for the former leader of Tian Chuang to be hanging out right now, so he makes their excuses, because he knows that Gao Chong must be VERY BUSY now that he’s got this corpse on his hands, so they’ll just BE GOING, thanks so much. Gao Chong hopes to see them at the Hero’s Conference, and WKX responds in a Significant Tone that of course he’ll be at the Hero’s Conference, and now ZZS has his Thinky Face on again, because WKX is not nearly as subtle as he seems to think he is when he’s making Pronouncements.

The ZZS/WKX Show really starts kicking into gear that night, at the Getting Lucky Good Luck Inn, where we open on ZZS wandering contemplatively around his room, looking beautiful in the soft light of evening (your FACE, Zhang Zhehan) and ruminating on Prince Jin’s motives for wanting the Glazed Armor, like he’s never met this power-hungry asshole before. Also, he thinks to himself, wtf was that, with Gao Chong keeping anybody from seeing Chengling in the last ep? There’s a knock on the door, which momentarily confuses him - understandably, because as we’ll see, WKX doesn’t generally get the concept of announcing yourself and waiting to be invited in by knocking first, preferring to dramatically bust open doors (at least to ZZS’s bedroom) and grace you with his presence, whatever your thoughts on the matter are. He’s accompanied by waiters and dinner, and ZZS realizes his senses are going, presumably because he can’t smell this spread that WKX has procured in an attempt to prove what a good provider he is (what did I say about food and bonding? ZZS fed him in the market, and now it’s his turn to feed ZZS). WKX tells us that life is just three hots and a cot - which gives away more about your life than you would likely be comfortable with us knowing, Lao Wen, given how close to the vest you’re holding your cards – and that everything else can wait if you can have a meal with someone you like. :coff: (Also, remember this, it will come around again.)

Cut to dinner by flickering candlelight, the better for soft lighting to caress ZZH’s exquisite face, but ZZS isn’t into it at all, staring into space instead of eating WKX’s proffered Courtship Delicacies. This earns what’s possibly WKX’s most hypocritical and amusing comment yet, which is to ask ZZS, “What is it that you can’t tell me?” ZZS - apparently - is still feeling soft about WKX’s help against Tian Chuang’s Chengling-kidnapping attempt - or maybe he’s thinking that a little bit of opening up on his part will soften up WKX - because he hardly has to have a spoon dug into his ribs at all to admit that he’s wondering if it was a mistake to bring Chengling to Five Lakes Alliance. My dude, just steal him back, then. WKX laughs at him and tells him he’s got such a handsome face (true) along with a kind and innocent heart (false, he’s a former government spook and assassin, a part-time ill-tempered gremlin, and a whole-ass troll), and therefore girls will clearly go crazy for him (true, just ask me). ANYWAY, A-Xu, (WKX continues) now that the requisite random no-homo boilerplate is out of the way, are you really thinking of taking on Chengling as a disciple, because now is apparently not too soon to have the adoption conversation about Our Son. I almost expect him to pull out the adoption papers then and there. Instead, he pulls out a story - which is awkwardly placed and kind of clunky, actually, despite being thematically important - of a dog he had once, given to him by Someone Very Important, although of course he’s not going to say who that was (:facepalm:), and his mother warning him that he’d have to take care of it for life, and then he betrayed it.

So, there’s a lot going on here. We’ll eventually find out that ZZS gave Zhen Yan a puppy, so will this story of a gift dog jog ZZS’s memory into realizing that WKX is Zhen Yan without WKX actually telling him, so that WKX can tell his Bundle of Neuroses that it’s not reeeaaallly WKX’s fault ZZS figured it out? Also, WKX sees ZZS being like this about Chengling, and in the Chengling = Zhen Yan equation we’ve already established, is it possible this will prime ZZS to remember another disciple/young boy he took responsibility for, at one point? Of course, on ZZS’s side of things, it’s possible that hearing about this dog that WKX failed is likely to remind him of the way he failed his own responsibility to all the other disciples of Siji Manor, so, excellent way to take a stab at his heart, WKX! However, ZZS breaks the miserable tone we’ve become mired in by smacking WKX, chiding him for comparing their son to a dog, and getting them drinking. See, here, Chengling is the dog. Earlier, the two sisters A-Xiang rescued were the dog. Later, A-Xiang will be the dog. Unfortunately, WKX is going to have a blind spot and never quite realize that, in the Ghost Valley schema he’s set up, the Department of the Unfaithful is also the dog, but we’ll get to that in later eps. For now, cut to later that night: After dinner and a washup, ZZS sits on his bed, and we get some special effects to indicate that his hearing is also giving him problems, so he deploys his special Nightly Nails Torment meditation pose, and then we get the second instance of WKX playing the xiao to help him meditate and rest. (Junjun, your hands on that xiao …) ANYWAY, we get a gorgeous little bit of physical acting from ZZH here that could easily have been overplayed but is nicely restrained and subtle, with just the slightest smile when ZZS realizes WKX is playing, and then his whole body visibly relaxing as he allows himself to sink into WKX’s now-familiar musical embrace the meditation. It is :chef’s kiss:

Cut to next AM, when ZZS is now a very cranky boy, and I get this, because I also am exceedingly irritated when people bust into the room where I’m sleeping with an abundance of cheerfulness and try to get me to interact and do things without at least half an hour to creep my way out of bed, two cups of coffee, and an hour of silence before any attempts to converse like a reasonable human being (I’m looking at YOU, mom), and I don’t even have the excuse of seven Nails pinning me. Also, when WKX whips off the blankets, we learn that ZZH dresses to the right. :hands: I’m just making an observation. So, WKX wants to go to Yuefan Tower like some kind of wide-eyed tourist, and despite some smacking and scowling and death threats, we then smash-cut to the Tower, where ZZS has apparently come to the conclusion that the only way to deal with the ADHD gremlin crawling into his bed is to humor him about this daytrip. I think you could have come up with some more creative ideas that didn’t involve leaving bed, but I guess you’re not the fast one in this relationship, Zhou-ge. Srsly, though, I’m sure WKX would have been happy to do all the work, my dude. (I don’t always have strong top-bottom preferences, but you probably aren’t going to have much luck convincing me that ZZS is not a pillow princess who wants to just lay back and be spoiled. “Aren’t you a very capable man?” indeed. WKX has to do ALL THE WORK, god. I don’t know if I’m swimming against the current here – god knows I was in Inception fandom, where I felt the same way about Eames - but here we are.) Also, I can’t believe WKX didn’t just sit in the bedroom and creep on A-Xu’s beautiful sleeping profile for at least the amount of time it would have taken to drink a pot of tea, another viable option if it was me in this scenario. Tch. What kind of stalker are you, Lao Wen?

ANYWAY, at Yuefang Tower, ZZS tells us about the Four Sages of Anji, a senior-citizen polycule of soulmates who are, conveniently, at this very moment, on a boat in the lake beside the tower, playing music and sword-dancing. This is the first time they’ve been seen in 10+ years, after they put down their various swords and ran off together to live like hippies off-the-grid in the woods, probably skipping around naked, drinking “tea,” and having lots of sex. ZZS sighs wistfully while recounting this tale and calls them “a breath of fresh air.” There’s some discussion and poetry quoting and literary references to soulmates, and somewhere in here we get a shot of ZZS and WKX from behind which makes it super-obvious how hard they’re working the costumes to make Gong Jun look as broad as possible. He’s got the power shoulders on this set of robes, compared to Laopo ZZS’s soft, unstructured, flowing robes, and with those shoulders tapering down to the belted waist, they’ve got Junjun seriously working the Chris Evans Dorito silhouette. Meanwhile, focus back on their conversation: ZZS thinks that “the world is not important, finding a soulmate is,” giving some MAJOR FORESHADOWING for the end of the show (which we are accepting as “Ep” 37 because WE ARE), when we get that icy separation from the rest of the world but they have each other. WKX gives him a yearning look. ZZS looks back … there’s really no other way to put this … coyly, not meeting WKX’s gaze directly. This offers WKX and us a chance to admire his profile once again, thank you, Laopo. ZZS waits until WKX looks back out at the lake before looking at him directly, and his face journey, y’all. He’s thinking that it might not be bad to spend his remaining time with this soulmate, I think he’s starting to re-think the slow suicide, and he’s also thisclose to just letting WKX have him. Y’all, he seriously wants WKX so bad, here. It may be the first time we’ve seen this level of interest from him - it may be the first time, in all that we’ve seen of him, that he allows himself to even have that kind of interest. I think this is the next big step from Ep 6, when he allowed himself to enjoy being desired - now he’s allowing himself to desire, to want something again, other than a chance to drink himself to death in the gutter. This, right here, is a crucial point when he makes the decision to spend whatever time he’s got left living rather than just dying, and I’m flailing on the couch. This is the face of a man who’s ready to Make Some Declarations while getting railed within an inch of his life. SOMEONE IS GETTING SOME TONIGHT. Or he would if he wasn’t going to turn out to be such a fuckup. FFS, WKX.

But first, we cut to a scene of them back at the marketplace, wandering through as WKX mocks various sects in town for the conference – including the Mount Hua boys, who apparently look like virgins make their first trip to a brothel – and ZZS supplies background info on them. WKX asks if ZZS can tell what sect WKX is from, and ZZS calls him a messy bitch before asking if WKX can please stop making him play guessing games about everything and just tell him what WKX so clearly wants ZZS to know. (I know, right? But no, because then WKX might get what he wants, and he’s way too terrified for that, so you have to guess. That way, it’s not his fault when you figure out who he is and reject him, as anyone clearly will do because he’s unlovable and unforgiveable and not even really human, A-Xu.) WKX immediately changes the subject to ramble about the Hero’s Conference and how laughable all the sects are for wanting to be seen as heroes, blah blah blah, rinse and repeat. ZZS comments that only inexperienced people want to be heroes, that experienced people know “every character of the word hero is written in blood,” and yes, the character they’re using for hero, “ying,” is still the same character used in Han Ying’s name (which is not, by the way, the “ying” used in Wei Ying’s name, to cross streams for a moment). ZZS says he’s too old to be a hero (I and my knees feel you, my dude), now he’s just a wanderer, and he asks if WKX wants to be a hero or a wanderer, and WKX says that as a wanderer, all he needs is ZZS, and I’m telling you, someone absolutely would be getting some tonight if only he wasn’t such a fuckup, Lao Wen.

I’m’a try to wrap this up soon, because it’s gotten v. long, but we then cut to that night at the Getting Lucky Inn, ZZS drinking in his room, WKX busting in with his usual dramatic flair, with wine, inviting ZZS up to the roof to drink and look at the moon. He clearly has ulterior motives, but unfortunately for everyone, we’re going to discover they’re not the ulterior motives ZZS is expecting. As they lean back on the roof together, hands almost-but-not-quite touching, a romantic tune playing, WKX tells ZZS that he’s like, really happy! Just super happy! So happy! Ask me why I’m so happy, A-Xu! Spoiler alert: It is, unfortunately, not because he’s getting ready to get some from his laopo. This is particularly unfortunate, because ZZS chooses this moment to take another big step in this relationship, telling WKX that he’s not going to ask about things WKX doesn’t want to tell him, that he’ll wait for whatever WKX wants to tell him. On the surface, this comes off a little bit like, I’m done with asking when you’re not going to answer anyway, but in context – particularly on the back of the earlier scene when ZZS watched WKX turn on a dime and immediately change the subject to avoid exposing anything when ZZS asked WKX to stop making him guess everything – this is as good as a declaration of going all-in. ZZS is committing to this relationship on faith, without having all – or even most – of the answers about WKX, and his approach is going to be to wait until WKX is ready to reveal whatever information he feels safe and comfortable revealing. In practice, he’s going to end up being better or worse at this, depending on the day, but what it reminds me of, already, is that moment in the 20s (Ep 21? 22?) when A-Xiang and Cao Weining are arguing about her killing the beggar guy, he approaches her, she yells at him and points to the ground to indicate exactly how close he’s allowed to get to her, and his respect of that boundary she lays down is instantaneous and absolute. That’s what ZZS is saying he’s going to at least try to do, here. It also reminds me of the way he’s going to respect WKX’s decision on whether or not WKX is going to claim his place as a disciple of Siji Manor, without it affecting their relationship, so we really are starting as ZZS means to go on, here.

Unfortunately, we then find out that what WKX is actually so happy about is that his plan to burn down the jianghu is starting its next big step, and their romantic evening is interrupted by a bunch of dudes fighting and killing each other over a bunch of fake Glazed Armor. WKX mentions that he’s so happy the show’s started; he’s alternately amused, satisfied, and smug as they watch various fights; he seems to be expecting ZZS to also be amused; and I feel like the implication is that this was his real motive for inviting ZZS out onto the roof, to be able to watch this show with him. ZZS – who’s spent enough time standing ankle-deep in blood for six lifetimes and was working hard just a few weeks ago at drinking himself to death to try to forget what that feels like - is displeased and horrified, rather than very proud of what WKX has accomplished; he pushes WKX away from him when WKX approaches him to ask if he doesn’t think it’s all so very amusing; and he calls WKX crazy, then turns his back on him and walks away. To make things worse, the next morning, after WKX brings breakfast to ZZS’s room and actually knocks, only to find that ZZS has left in the middle of the night, WKX will witness an angry mob gathered outside the house in the woods where the Four Sages of Anji are staying for the Hero’s Conference, demanding a piece of the Glazed Armor the Sages are supposedly holding for Gao Chong, and eventually leading to the deaths of all four of these peaceful aging hippies whose commune in the woods was ZZS’s ultimate dream, leaving WKX horrified by the fact that his actions have consequences, including some that are going to make his boyfriend even more pissed off at him.

SO. All that happened. There were some other people in the episode, too:

We see A-Xiang and Cao Weining having lunch. She asks him why he’s not eating, calls him fat and cute, then proceeds to tell him about Ghoul, who likes to eat the faces of pretty boys. Her conversation skills could still use some work. Cao Weining vows to kill the ghosts of Ghost Valley who would do such awful things. A-Xiang actually ignores this slander about the evil of the residents of the Ghost Valley in a way that she doesn’t usually – usually she looks kind of unhappy when the Evilness of the Evil Inhabitants of the Evil Ghost Valley comes up, going all the way back to ZZS’s comments in Ep 2. Right now, she’s too busy pumping Pooh Bear for information, asking about why the Ghost Valley would have left a pile of heads on Yueyang’s doorstep if the Five Lakes Alliance is so great, so what is Five Lakes going to maybe, perhaps, do about this? Cao-dage is suspicious … that A-Xiang might be scared, but don’t worry, he’ll protect her. Oh, sweetheart. I could eat you up with a spoon, right along with Ghoul. Also, it finally registers that A-Xiang called him cute, but she has to step away for a quick confab with a henchwoman.

We also have to watch Chengling get bullied some more by a Yueyang shixiong who I think is Gao Shan, who we’ll later see bullying some prisoners in the Yueyang dungeon as he admits that he’s doing it to relieve his own frustrations and make himself feel better -  fantastic disciples you’ve got there, Gao Chong, I’m super-impressed by the morality and ethics you’re instilling as a sect. Once again, I have to consider WKX’s position on the jianghu as a hive of scum and villainy. Anyway, once Bullying Hour is over, Chengling runs into A-Xiang, and he can’t manage to prevent the waterworks as he confesses that he thought he’d never see any of them again and that ZZS didn’t want him. UGH. Zhou Zishu, come and get your child back. He’s at least somewhat mollified by Xiang-jie telling him she’s been sent to take care of him, and god knows she’s managed to keep WKX fed and clothed this long, so she has some experience as a minder, as counterintuitive as that seems.

We get a quick shot of Han Ying (My Beloved) with two identical pieces of Glazed Armor, apparently realizing that there are fakes out there.

Deng Kuan shows up, beaten and stumbling, and nearly gets turned away at the front gates of his own sect as a beggar – have I mentioned how unimpressed I am by the Yueyang disciples? Deng Kuan appears to be the only one of them worth anything – before they realize who he is. He is put to bed and tenderly nursed by Gao Xiaolian, who cries over him as he won’t wake up.

Finally, Gao Chong, Shen Shen and Zhao Jing (uh-huh) are horrified to discover that there’s fake Glazed Armor fk’n everywhere in town, making Five Lakes Alliance look ridiculous, which is just fabulous as the Hero’s Conference is coming up, guys. Shen Shen, because everything is a nail, vows to kill anyone who makes problems. Later, Hei Zi, who plays Gao Chong, has an utterly fantastic moment after the deaths of the Four Sages (wow, I did not remember that we wrapped up their entire storyline within a single ep), when he’s haranguing Beggar Gang Chief and is literally all, “You want the Glazed Armor? :pulls a piece out of his robe: HERE. You want some more? :pulls another piece out of his robe: TAKE IT.” It’s a great acting moment, his delivery is perfection.

#zhou zishu #wen kexing #zhang chengling #gu xiang #cao weining #han ying #deng kuan #gao chong #word of honor #word of honor episode reax

[anambermusicbox]

September 29 Day Countdown (26/29): 2016-2018 Radio Interviews on 动感101《小畅翻牌》

2016/12/20

(2:00) Interviewer, knowing Ukraine has renowned music schools, thought Zhou Shen went to Ukraine specifically to study music before she found out he actually was in dentistry and then switched to music; she asks why he went to Ukraine to study.

Zhou Shen: Simple! Because it’s cheap. (T/N: it’s extremely extremely cheap compared to studying abroad in other countries, and Zhou Shen’s family was quite poor)

(3:00) How did you win your parents over?

ZS: I didn’t. I told them, “Hey, I don’t think I can do this” and they were like “What?” I said, “I really can’t do this.” At first, they didn’t really understand what I was going through at the time. They said, even if I had to retake a year or two, they wanted me to keep going. They said, then take some time to improve in the language. I said, “I really can’t do this anymore,” they said no, and later I went against their wishes and applied to the music conservatory anyways.

(7:30) ZS talks about how he didn’t talk to his parents for months after switching schools, until finally his parents told him, “Then in the future, whatever you do is no longer our concern” and then hung up on him. 

ZS: (8:10) They said, okay we’re not giving you money for school, you figure it out yourself. But parents are like this: they say things but don’t go through with it. So they gave me money for tuition but nothing to cover living expenses. (*laughs*) (Interviewer: They said, whether you eat or not is no longer our concern) Yup. (*laughs*) They said they’d give me money for living expenses only if I studied medicine or language. So I had to borrow money from a classmate for food. I held out for 2 months, starved for 2 months before they said, okay since you’re this persistent, even though we’re still against this- (Interviewer: They still don’t want their son to starve to death) Right, they didn’t want to lose a kid. (*laughs*)

Interviewer: (9:00) When did their attitude finally soften towards your decision? 

ZS: After the Voice. (T/N: ZS didn’t tell his parents before he competed on the show; they found out along with the rest of the public when it aired) [...] They thought, ah okay he’ll be able to take care of himself now, he knows what he’s doing.

Interviewer: (9:50) Are they proud of you?

ZS: Oh yeah, they’re absolutely embarrassing. (*laughs*) After the episode aired, my parents- they run a small business, and customers who came by, my parents would be like, “Look :) who this is :)” and the customer would be like “…??…uuhh who is-“ “ITS HUAN YAN, OUR SON SANG IT!!!” (*laughs*) and then the customer is like “uuhhh ehhrmm….” I wanted to die from the embarrassment oh my gOD, it was so awkward. So awkward. Afterwards, I started avoiding being with them when they were with people. (*laughs*) They- they’re parents; they were happy, and then they started to worry. (*laughs*) This career... how long would I be able to do it for...

(11:50) ZS talks about how surprised he was by how popular Big Fish was; after only a few days, a lot of covers started appearing online. The singers for Big Fish and Begonia’s other OSTs were very big names, Eason Chan and Lala Hsu.

ZS: At first, they planned to have another very big name singer to sing Big Fish (T/N: it was supposed to be Faye Wong!), but because of reasons, their plan never came to fruition. The song’s lyricist, Yin Yue, she’s really too good to me. She kept insisting to the director, “Zhou Shen can sing this song, you should let him try,” but the director honestly didn’t care. The production company and the director, they wanted someone had enough influence to promote the film. (Interviewer: But congratulations to them, they ended up choosing the right person for the song! :D)

(19:30) ZS: “[After Masked Singer], my parents, they posted a WeChat moment they was quite touching—they said “Our son sang so well and seeing him work so hard—we want him to continue singing.” (Interviewer: Oh so they go online often?”) Yeah, only because I spent years teaching them.” (*laughs*) 

(19:45) ZS: “Every time I come home, my parents play my songs non-stop. I asked them, aren’t you sick of listening to it? Later I asked my sister, and she told me they play my songs all the time everyday. I felt like, wah (Interviewer: “All these years of being a host, and my own parents are the most avid viewers of my program.”) Wow… auntie uncle, I’m very sorry… (T/N: LKJNASFDFA THIS MADE ME SPIT OUT MY FOOD I WAS EATING HAHAHA) they’re gonna hate me. [...] I think, being a parent is really such hard work.”

2016/12/17

(5:30) ZS talks about how he didn’t sing at all during in his middle school years. Interviewer asks whether he ever tried to conceal his being different from everyone else.

ZS: Actually, when you listen to me talk, I- all these years I’ve already gotten accustomed to making my voice lower, it’s a force of habit. I’ve forgotten what my regular voice is supposed to be like. If I relaxed my throat while speaking it would sound like this—thinner, higher. But now I can’t go back.

(7:50) Interviewer asks whether he’ll try out different styles of music:

ZS: I think right now, people don’t know me well yet. I want people to first know who Zhou Shen is, what kind of songs he sings, and then try other genres, and only then will people want to listen. If release a song, people will be like, who’s Zhou Shen and won’t try listening to it—and if they listen and it’s a genre I’m not good at? Wow, no one’s going to listen.

2018/02/03

(1:50) ZS: “Well for one thing, I really hate my voice. (Interviewer: Why?) A male with this kind of voice is really weird. (Interviewer: It’s unique! It’s memorable. Can you find other people with this kind of voice?) Yup. My dad. (*laughs*) One time, my manager called my dad and he- “Hello?” “Oh hello auntie-” I was like “wAIT WAIT WAIT that’s my dad” (*laughs*) (Interviewer: Can he sing too?) No way, he scares people to death when he sings, he can’t sing. (*laughs*)

(7:45) After Big Fish was released:

ZS: Everyone seemed to like it, it felt- Eh? This is great. After about two weeks though, comments started to appear like: “just found out a man sang this and I feel like vomiting, I deleted this song immediately.” And it wasn’t just this one, there were many comments like it. It was extremely upsetting. I felt like, one of those characters in a sad drama, the kind that gets abandoned and they’re crying like “what did I do to you to make you treat me like this? TT^TT”

Interviewer: It’s like, even if there’s a whole pile of positive comments, if there’s one negative, that’s the one you pay attention to. Even if there are 100 nice comments—

ZS: —if there’s one hurtful comment, that’s the one that sticks with you, exactly! Everyone has this tendency.

(7:20) ZS talks about his duet with Guo Qin again (see translation from another interview talking about it here), how he was just as nervous as he was in his own blind audition and how he would’ve blamed himself if she had lost: “She’s 17—super young, makes me so mad—and she was sitting so calmly; meanwhile, I was standing there, all my limbs trembling—like, who’s supposed to be helping who here?” (*laughs*)

(14:45) About how he’s grateful that he didn’t get popular overnight: 

ZS: If I got popular overnight, I think it would’ve been over for me. Because my singing really did need improvement. Also, I think my album is really important in that in helped me get through a bottleneck period. At that time, I felt like, no matter how I sang it didn’t sound good. I felt like, can I even sing? But the process of recording this album helped me to see where I needed to improve. 

So if I got popular overnight, it really would’ve been over for me, because my singing wouldn’t have improved. It would’ve stopped there. (Interviewer: And you would still believe that you’re really good.) Everyone around you is praising you like (*rapid clapping*) “You sing so well!! You sing so well!! Look at how everyone wants to hire you to sing, you sing super well!!” It’s over- it would really be over. […] I quite like progressing one step at a time.

(18:10) Zhou Shen talks about how, when he got eliminated on the Voice, he wasn’t crying because he lost, but because suddenly going from spending so much time together as a team and having such camaraderie to all but four eliminated was too heartbreaking.

ZS: (20:20) When I got eliminated, I was actually really happy. I don’t like competing, and I felt I didn’t have any pressure on me anymore. I felt bad for Li Wei because I knew there would definitely be a lot more pressure on him now, because now he has to represent our entire team in the future competition. 

After our PK, he—because we both cried so hard—he said (*shrill crying voice*) “Zhou Shen I’ll carry your name and compete to the end!! TT^TT” (*Interviewer laughs*) and I replied, (*shrill crying voice*) “You shouldn’t give yourself so much pressure, don’t carry my name just sing TT^TT” (*laughs*) 

You don’t understand how hard we were crying. After the PK, there had to be a 25-minute intermission because Na-jie had to cry too. So she’s there crying in the mentor area and I’m crying in the eliminated area and Li Wei’s crying in the advancement area. [...] During the blind auditions, every single person earned their place in the team one by one, and now all of them are being taken out one by one—it was quite brutal.

2018/02/10

(1:30) Zhou Shen talks about how he has a longer process to be accepted compared to other singers, because they first have to get over the fact that a man has this type of voice before they truly listen to him sing. Some people react like, WOW amazing!! while others are on the other end of the spectrum:

ZS: Once, I was at a restaurant and at that time, they were broadcasting the blind auditions of the Voice. The restaurant owner just happened to be watching it, and when I appeared, he was like “Eh? Who’s this- WAH-“ and immediately changed the channel. I was like ??? D’: ????? “…can I have some water?” (*laughs*) He changed the channel right in front of me, you know? He didn’t recognize me. It was- (*makes disgruntled noises*) It was really upsetting.

(2:20) ZS, about being on Masked Singer: “That was the first time I felt acknowledged by the sentence ‘wow this girl sings so well!’”

(20:30) In the three years since your debut, have you ever seen a fan who, because of your songs or your voice, their life changed?

ZS: Have I seen that personally? That would be impossible, but I have read about it in letters and comments. There was one comment, this person—they had depression, the kind that they were being prescribed medication for—but they started listening to my music and slowly started to become happier, their mental health improved. I was so astonished—music is really so powerful.

Another one was- to be honest, men with this type of voice are actually not uncommon. It’s really not just me. Once, I was at karaoke with an old schoolmate—middle school or high school, I forget—and he said, “because of you, Zhou Shen, because you sang in that competition [the Voice], I’m now brave enough to sing at karaoke. It feels like, even with this kind of voice, I can sing too.” That moment—I was so moved.

2018/05/19

(3:45) ZS talks about how Gao Xiaosong was really satisfied with how the album turned out, and how Gao Xiaosong is actually really thin.

Interviewer: Why do you always have to mention that? No one is asking about whether he’s fat or thin.

ZS, joking: How else do you think I got this album—I kept complimenting him as thin (T/N: HAHAHAHAHA)

#zhou shen #周深 #my translations #zs 29 #mine #puts this in the queue at 4 am 2 hours before the scheduled time....... #so much for fixing my sleep schedule OTL #so tired... i'll check for typos later asdfaADFAS #im just *chucks this at u* #this is why im only translating highlights LMAO #this interviewer is actually a host with shenshen as a guest on her show but im just using the same terminology to be consistent LOL #its definitely an interview anyways #check notes later for bilibili link! #edit: OKAY TYPOES SHOULD BE FIXED NOW HAHAHA THANKS EVERYONE