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kyovtani · 4 years

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𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖 – 𝒊𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒛𝒖𝒎𝒊 𝒉𝒂𝒋𝒊𝒎𝒆

࿏ pairing: iwaizumi hajime x chubby female reader ࿏ genre: fluff, smut, angst; best friends to lovers!AU ࿏ word count: 11.6k (at this point i have no explanation, im sorry) ࿏ warnings: swearing, mentions of body image issues, self doubts, anxiety, bullying, fat shaming; as well as violence and blood (iwa gets into a fight mwah); ddlg (daddy dom-little girl) dynamics, soft dom!iwa, body worship, praising, sugarcoated degradation, spitting, choking, fingering, face riding, unprotected sex

࿏ Summary: After four years of trying to get over your stupid crush on your best friend, said male finally comes back home and all of a sudden all of those plans are thrown overboard...

Even though you‘ve known about it for so long now, you still feel your heart skip a beat when Matsukawa mentions his return to Japan and no matter how hard you try to, you can‘t help the way the disgusting mixture of anxiety, nervousness and excitement starts filling your veins.

After all it‘s been literal years since you‘ve last seen him.

Iwaizumi Hajime, former Seijoh Ace, now freshly majored athletic trainer, your best friend of ten years and — love of your life.

However, of course he doesn‘t know about the latter and as pathetic as it may sound, you‘re quite proud of yourself for hiding your feelings for him so well that he hasn‘t suspected anything in all these years the two of you have been friends.

Of course it‘s painful and basically nothing but literal torture to watch the guy you‘ve lost your heart to years ago, move on with his life thinking he‘s nothing but a friend to you, but you know you‘d always choose this pain over the one of rejection and shame.

Because after all you‘re not his type or what he looks for in a partner and you're very much aware of it.

And no matter how many times you daydream about a life as his girlfriend, you won’t ever forget about the fact that Iwaizumi Hajime, basically a literal athlete, would never date someone who looked like you.

Growing up on the bigger side, physically wise, has always been difficult and something you're struggling with to this day. You had always hoped for those extra pounds to disappear once you hit puberty, just like it had happened to all of your friends but those hopes were quickly destroyed when you still found yourself hiding from full length mirrors to avoid having to look at your own body in your third year of High School.

By the time you turned eighteen, you had tried every kind of diet in hopes of losing weight but all of them just ended with you losing motivation and every bit of your happiness and even though you still struggle with it in your mid-twenties, you‘ve come to terms with it.

This is who you are and despite taking literal decades to realize it, you‘ve slowly but surely started accepting it.

However, when it comes to relationships, you‘ve given up completely.

After years and years of being rejected, hidden, fat shamed and disrespected by men who hated their own attraction to bigger women, you stopped wasting your time and energy on dating. If you wanted to hear someone shame you for being big, you could just go home to your family or back in your memory to remember all those mean things the skinny girls in your school had thrown at you.

Or you could just look in the mirror and let your brain do the job after eating literally anything.

Just thinking about a guy like Iwaizumi looking at you in that way has you chuckling coldly and every time you imagine confessing to him, it ends with a broken heart on your side because your brain loves to keep things realistic and never once have you considered the possibility of him liking you back.

It‘s not that Iwaizumi, or any of the Seijoh Volleyball boys, have treated you badly or even slightly differently in the three years you were their manager, but after having to deal with fat shaming your whole life, it has become quite difficult for you to believe that anyone found you attractive at all.

Especially people like the widely known Seijoh third years who also happen to – still – be your closest friends.

And unfortunately, as glad as you are that Iwaizumi remains rather oblivious to your year-long crush on him, the other boys, including the professional athlete to be, Oikawa Tōru who’s currently living his best life in Argentina are pretty much aware of your feelings for the trainer.

So, just as usual whenever the topic of Iwaizumi Hajime enters the conversation between the other two, you’re met with pitying stares from Takahiro and a lot of teasing coming from Issei. But at this point you’ve gotten quite used to it and don’t mind the brunette’s words, whereas you still find yourself growing absolutely annoyed at the way Makki stared at you.

“Stop staring at me like that, Hiro!”, you hiss and roll your eyes, the pity in his face so evident, if you didn’t know any better you’d think he’s mocking you.

“Just confess to him already!”, the strawberryblonde hisses, running one of his pale hands through his locks before he takes a big sip from his beer.

“Yeah, sure!”, you spit back, your words dripping in sarcasm and annoyance as you try to avoid your chest from growing even heavier at the thought of your best friend coming back after all those years.

“He broke up with that blondie months ago”, Matsukawa begins, his naturally sleepy gaze roaming your face attentively, “and he’s coming back to Japan. Now you really have no excuse left, Y/N”, and just as usual his words hit the right spot and all you can do is let out a shaky sigh before the intensity of your insecurities breaks down onto you like a huge wave.

“I‘m not his type, Mattsun”, you hiss, the bitter taste of reality coating the muscle of your tongue in the worst way possible, “and I‘ve had enough males reject and– or fat shame me. If I have to add Hajime to that list as well, it’s going to break me.”

You feel the two males’ soft gazes on you, whereas you can‘t help but focus on the napkin in between your fingers in hopes of distracting yourself from all those dark thoughts by nervously pulling at it.

“Iwa‘s not like that, Y/N”, Makki replies, brows furrowed in irritation; something you've grown quite used to seeing whenever the topic of your body image issues occured.

“Has he ever dated a big girl before, hm?”, you reply and look at him with arched brows and your lips pressed into a thin line. At the lack of response from the two men in front of you, you just lean back and nod.

“That‘s the point”, you take another deep, shaky breath; the tears threatening to spill from your glossy eyes at the thought of your pretty faced best friend and only men in your heart, “nobody likes women who look like me in that certain way, my loves. Every guy I‘ve been and slept with wanted to hide me or the relationship we had because they didn‘t want to be seen with a big girl.”

Suddenly you‘re hit with the memory of all those times you went home after any kind of intercourse with a male who had brought your hopes up with sugarcoated lies. Only to receive a harsh reality check when they asked you to not tell anyone about it, knowing it‘s simply because of the fact you aren‘t part of society‘s beauty standards.

“Y/N, we-”, “I‘m not talking about you two”, you‘re quick to interrupt Hanamaki, giving him a soft smile, “I know you don‘t care about it and sometimes I find myself wishing I would have fallen for one of you instead of the professional trainer”, you let out an empty, coldhearted chuckle before you finish your glass of wine in one go.

“I would fuck you without hesitation”, Mattsun shrugs, his plump lips stretching into a playful smirk and the tiny hint of seriousness in his gaze has you rolling your eyes with a soft scoff.

“Oh, shut the fuck up, Issei”, Makki hisses and gives his best friend the same reaction as you.

“What? I‘m being serious! You know this isn‘t the first time I‘m offering this to you, pretty one”, the brunette replies and this time you can‘t help but chuckle softly at his words, showing him your appreciation for his ability to make such heavy topics vanish from the surface so easily.

“Thank you, Issei but that guy I met on Tinder has been ghosting me for two weeks after we fucked and that‘s why I‘ve had enough dick for now”, and just when you let your gaze roam over the brunette‘s handsome face, you watch Hanamaki‘s face brighten up suddenly and furrow your brows in confusion.

“Hearing Y/N talk about dick is definitely not what I was expecting to come back to but it‘s surely a surprise!”

And upon hearing the familiar voice of your best friend, you understand the reason behind the change in Makki’s expression.

You watch the other two get up from their chairs, approaching the freshly majored trainer with the biggest smiles plastered on their faces whereas you try your best to stay as calm as possible.

However, the simple thought of Iwaizumi coming back had already stressed you out and having him stand behind you in all his glory made the tightness in your chest and the struggle to take proper breaths intensify just like that.

After what feels like an eternity you finally get yourself to stand up as well, turning around literally convinced you‘re ready to see him again after all these years only for it to be the exact opposite.

Your heart skips a whole beat at the sight of Iwaizumi and for a quick second you feel yourself getting dizzy from the lack of oxygen in your lungs.

“Hey”, he mumbles, his voice deep and raspy, something you‘re used to since the two of you have been talking regularly on the phone over the time yet hearing it in person again sends a jolt of hot arousal right into your core.

You nervously let your eyes roam his face; taking in the sight of his features, which have become even sharper during his absence. A soft sigh falls past your lips when you find the little scar right underneath his eyebrow which he had gotten back in middle school during one of his volleyball practices. The familiarity and feeling of security in the soft expression of his pretty, dark green eyes calms you down in an instant and by the time you feel your muscles ease up a bit, he‘s already approaching you with open arms.

Different than you’ve expected from yourself, you‘re quick to wrap your arms around his slim waist, taking him into your embrace with the intention of never letting him go again and at the feeling of his big hands on your body, you can‘t help but tear up a little.

You sniffle softly against the crook of his neck, Iwaizumi letting out a breathy chuckle at your sweet reaction as he caresses your back gently, subconsciously massaging your soft flesh to calm you down even more.

“Seems like someone missed me a lot more than she wanted to admit on the phone, hm?”, Iwa mumbles softly, placing the sweetest kiss on the top of your head as he holds you tight.

Matsukawa and Hanamaki let out a row of deep chuckles, partly laughing at your obvious reaction and partly because of their best friend‘s blatant oblivion.

“Shut up”, you reply with a sniff, taking in the light yet intense smell of his aftershave as well as the scent of detergent you had missed oh so much.

“Enough now, Y/N”, Mattsun huffs, “you can cuddle his stupid ass some other time, let‘s catch up with Mister America”, he adds and you know too well the tall brunette simply does it to stop you from falling even further into this dark hole you‘ve dug yourself; all those years ago.

Throughout the whole night, you stay rather quiet; listening to Iwaizumi‘s stories, more so to his voice but definitely his stories, too.

And every time he mentions some random girl he hooked up with or one of his ex girlfriends, you can literally feel the way he‘s avoiding your gaze; his eyes moving away from your face to focus on the guys as his voice turns a little less enthusiastic. You try your best not to read anything into it, knowing he‘s always been more hesitant towards you when it came to topics like this and in some way you find yourself appreciating it because it definitely helps to make the pain in your chest a little less heavy.

The atmosphere between the four of you remains calm; the familiarity something you‘ve always missed despite you and the other two boys spending just as much time together as you used to back in High School. Having Iwaizumi in your little circle again definitely has changed the air and it‘s in times like these you realize just how close you all actually are.

However, when Hanamaki and Matsukawa both stand up, cigarettes firmly placed between their plump lips, telling the two of you to give them a few minutes, you feel yourself slowly wandering into a state of anxiousness and slight panic.

It‘s not like you haven‘t talked to him alone during his stay in America, but the thought of having to look him in the eyes as you speak has always been something you‘ve struggled with.

Iwaizumi has this certain expression in his beautiful, dark green eyes, which makes it so much harder to not fall for him even more.

You don‘t know if it‘s the confidence and lack of insecurity or the mixture of softness and home which have the butterflies in your stomach go absolutely crazy.

Neither of you say anything for a good minute, your eyes glued to your phone screen which continuously lights up; Oikawa‘s name appearing several times.

You excuse yourself to give the professional athlete the responses he‘s waiting for, rolling your eyes at his way of telling you to shoot your shot at Iwa and “get that D”.

“Are you still talking to that one guy you told me about?”, Iwaizumi suddenly says, his eyes never once leaving yours and with a soft chuckle, you shake your head; enjoying the amount of protectiveness dripping from his words.

“We fucked and then he ghosted me”, you say casually, not realizing that it‘s not one of the other two boys you‘re talking to and with a soft gasp of embarrassment you try to mumble your way out of the situation.

“Iwa, I‘m-”, “Why the fuck would he even do that? Give me his fucking address so I can introduve his kneecaps to my baseball bat”, he‘s quick to interrupt you harshly, his tone filled with anger as his eyes gleam with wrath.

“It‘s okay”, you smile softly, placing your hand on his balled fists to calm him down again, “he told me not to tell anyone that we did it so his intentions have never been good. And on top of that – his dick game was so bad, I didn‘t even get to finish but had to take care of it myself, so it‘s definitely not worth the headache.”

You watch Iwaizumi‘s expression darken even further, his beautiful dark green eyes roaming your face with irritation oozing from his gaze and for a second you like to believe that there‘s even a hint of jealousy in between all those intense emotions but just as usual you find yourself shaking it off rather quickly.

“Why did he ask you not to tell anyone? What the fuck is even wrong with that guy?”, the brunette spits, downing the rest of his beer in one go.

You know why he‘s this angry and at this point you can’t even blame him anymore. Iwaizumi has never really understood why you put up with guys who treated you like absolute shit; continuously telling you how you deserved so much better and even though you wanted to agree, you simply couldn‘t. Because in your head, all those men who were ashamed of being with you yet still found their way to your door were exactly what was meant to be your life.

“Because being with a woman like me isn‘t anything he‘s proud of, Iwa”, you sigh, the words heavy and bitter on your tongue as you struggle to voice the hard reality.

“A woman like you?”, he replies and you see the genuine confusion on his handsome face, making his oblivion sweet almost.

“A big woman, Iwaizumi. Guys don‘t date big girls because we don‘t fit into society‘s beauty standards so being with us is something they‘re ashamed of because God forbid someone thinks they find us attractive“, you nervously play with the hem of your skirt, not having the courage to look into his face as those thing leave your lips, too embarrassed to meet his usually so welcoming and soft, but now wrath-filled gaze.

“That‘s bullshit”, Hajime is quick to spit back, hating the way you belittle yourself like that because of a random guy.

You smile, a soft scoff falling past your lips before you take a sip from the glass in front of you and even though you know you‘re going to regret those words, you still can‘t get yourself to stop from leaving you.

“Then why have you never dated a big girl, Haji?”, your voice is slightly shaky yet you remain the eye contact like a champion, never once averting your gaze from his handsome face even though the thrumming of your heart in your throat makes it so much more difficult to stay focused.

Iwaizumi seems taken aback; your words obviously hitting a place he wasn‘t expecting and that‘s when the feeling of guilt reaches its peak.

“I‘m not- It‘s not because I don‘t find them attractive I just- I uhm-”, the freshly majored professional trainer stumbles over his words like a two-year-old who just started learning how to speak and at the sight of a deep blush covering the apples of his cheeks as well as the tip of his nose and the whole of his neck, you let out a soft sigh.

“You don‘t have to explain yourself, Iwaizumi. I wasn‘t trying to accuse you of anything or offend you in any way, I promise. It’s just a topic I‘ve grown really tired of in the past few years”, you explain, making sure to choose your words carefully and when the tall male suddenly starts calming down again, you know you‘ve got him.

“Y/N, look-”, “Hey, Y/N the weak-dick-game guy is sitting at the bar with his ugly friends, just for your information”, Matsukawa‘s deep voice quickly cuts Iwaizumi off, his words sending shivers down your spine in the most disgusting way possible and with an almost painful roll of your eyes, you down the rest of your best friend‘s beer.

“Wait- What? Which one is it?”, Iwaizumi grunts, the calmness from a few seconds ago completely gone as you look at him with brows furrowed in slight irritation and annoyance.

“It doesn‘t matter, Iwa”, you say and wrap your fingers around his tattooed wrist, making him look into your eyes with another soft exhale, “he‘s not worth it. Just let it go.”

“Y/N, I said”, Iwaizumi is quick to place one of his big hands on your cheek, the dominance in his aura and the authority gleaming in his eyes has you gasping for air and just as usual you feel your panties growing wetter by the minute, “which one is it?”

His words don‘t leave room for protest; so strict and demanding, no matter how hard you try to think rationally, his naturally dominant persona has you submitting to him in a way no other guy has ever managed to.

“T-The one with the long, dark purple Hair”, you quickly reply, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth at the sight of Iwaizumi‘s anger and determination.

“Good girl”, he mumbles and pulls away, not even aware of the way his praise has your cunt throbbing like crazy and you absolutely hate him for it.

For a second you can‘t even get back to reality, the haze of arousal and longing for the tall male standing in front of you completely taking over your consciousness.

However, as soon as your brain registers Makki‘s panicked voice, you‘re quick to snap back and without missing another beat, you grab Iwaizumi‘s arm and look at him with pleading eyes.

“Please don‘t make a scene”, you whisper, knowing oh too well how much he loves to get himself in trouble because of his friends.

“He fucked then ghosted you all that while saying he doesn‘t want anyone to know he was with you because you're a big girl? That ugly fucker needs a fucking reality check because he can count himself hella fucking lucky to ever get a go with a woman as amazing and hot as you”, Iwaizumi hisses, his words filled with anger yet so, so sweet that without giving it another thought, you simply let go and try not to show him just how flustered he‘s gotten you.

“Are you guys about to kiss right now?”, Matsukawa suddenly says and with an almost audible roll of your eyes you lift your hand up, showing him your middle finger before you watch Iwaizumi‘s brows furrow even further with visible irritation.

“Then don‘t fight him”, you sigh, “please, Hajime, don‘t get yourself in trouble for a guy who‘s not worth it.”

“We‘ll see about it”, is all he says before he moves out of your tight grip, leaving you to stand at the table like that.

You feel your heart picking up its pace at the sight of the love of your life approaching your ex-hook up; several worst case scenarios popping up in your head within a few short seconds. And unfortunately every single one ends with Hajime throwing his fist into the guy‘s face because of his raging anger issues; something he‘s been trying to handle throughout his whole life.

“Makki, please do something”, you whimper and look at the strawberryblonde with glossy eyes; shivers running down your spine at the sudden sound of Hajime's deep voice cutting through the music of the bar.

“Not into you my fucking ass”, Takahiro hisses and follows Iwaizumi with quick steps, whereas Matsukawa remains next to you, watching the scene unfold with the fattest, shit eating grin on his face.

And while you‘re worried about Iwaizumi‘s well-being, said male can‘t even seem to think straight. The only thing he manages to focus on is the raging anger and hot wrath rushing through his veins at the thought of some random, small dicked guy treating you like dirt. With every step he takes, it seems to get worse and at some point the professional trainer is worried about his physical health because of the pace his heart is hammering against his rib cage with.

Iwaizumi has always struggled to understand why you put up with males who are literally unworthy of your presence yet every time he had asked, you simply shrugged and told him that this was how you were meant to be loved. Behind closed doors, hidden away from the world by people who literally worship the society‘s beauty standard.

And all of that when you‘ve had him right in front of you for all those years, ready to love and worship every bit of your body and soul.

Of course for you to let him love you he might have had to tell you about his feelings but as the years passed by, Iwaizumi slowly started to lose every bit of hope he had left. During his four year long absence you‘ve had your fair share of boyfriends and after the third one, the only choice he had left was to force himself to move on or else he would have lost his mind.

It‘s not like he never wanted to confess during High School but there was just something holding him back. The thought of losing you was heavy on his chest especially because Iwaizumi was very well aware you didn‘t feel the same. So for his own sake he chose not to tell you about his feelings for you; not even bearing the mental image of going through such rough times without you by his side.

He‘s already lost count of the amount of times he wanted to scream at you about how he would treat you just how you truly deserved to be treated and not like those douchebags who liked to use you for their own pleasure just to throw you away like a used tissue once they were done.

And after not being able to physically do anything for you because of the distance, he‘s finally got the chance to show you that no, those guys‘ behavior is not okay and yes, putting them back into their place is absolutely worth the headache.

“Hey”, the trainer hisses, coming to stand directly in front of the tall, purple haired guy, Rin Matsuoka, who‘s quick to harden his expression upon seeing the brunette.

“What can I help you with, big guy?”, Rin mumbles, placing his bottle of beer on the counter with his brows raised in curiosity.

Iwaizumi doesn‘t even waste another minute as he harshly grabs the collar of Rin‘sblack leather jacket, pulling him closer to himself. His friends rather quickly, yet Hanamaki and this time even Matsukawa are faster, coming to stand right next to each one of them with their arms firmly placed in front of their bodies to stop them from intervening.

“You‘re gonna listen to me and you‘re gonna listen good, did you fucking hear me?”, and just like a few minutes ago, Hajime‘s voice is cold and distant, not leaving room for discussion all while making sure to keep his tight grip.

The confusion and immense irritation is clearly visible on Rin‘s features; brows furrowed, jaw tensed and eyes gleaming with some kind of unnameable anger.

And the longer you watch the situation unfold, the heavier the anxiety in your system becomes and as you struggle to take proper breaths, you find yourself approaching your best friends; not wanting him to get his hands dirty on a guy like Matsuoka.

“What the-”, “Iwa please, he‘s not worth it..”, you say and wrap your fingers around his wrist, trying to find his gaze with desperate eyes only for him to gulp harshly and calmly tell you to take a step back.

“You?”, Rin spits, his dark eyes boring into your side as you try to ignore him; the amount of humiliation and shame washing over your body way too overwhelming to handle.

“Haji, let‘s just go, please”, you whisper, taking his face into your hands, his skin literally burning underneath your fingertips.

“No, Y/N, this stupid bastard has to understand that you can‘t just go and treat women like absolute dirt and get away with it”, Iwaizumi moves out of your soft touch, making Rin shift his attention back on you before the deep voice of one of his friends cuts through the tension.

“What the fuck is he talking about, Rin? Do you know her?”, the blonde says, his tone rather degrading when talking about you and at the way his eyes roam your body with a rather opposed expression show you exactly why that‘s the case.

“N-No, I don‘t!”, he‘s quick to defend himself, his eyes shifting to his friends with sheer panic filling the dark color and you feel your heart sink and the disgusting feeling of shame rushing through your veins.

“You‘re such a fucking piece of shit, Rin”, you hiss and swallow your tears; the taste bitter as the realization of being sometjing to be ashamed of hits you yet again.

“You definitely weren‘t acting like this when you fucked me”, you add and roll your eyes, taking a step back as the anger overcomes you and you basically give Iwaizumi a silent free pass to do whatever the hell he needs to, “or better said – when you tried to. It wasn‘t like I came with your weak dick game anyway so..”

“You fucked that fat bitch? Oh, yikes”, the other friend suddenly says, his words hitting you in the face like literal bricks and before you can even take your next breath or shift your eyes to the face the voice belongs to, the guy suddenly falls to the floor, holding his bloody nose.

You let out a shocked gasp, your eyes falling to Hanamaki who‘s busy shaking his hand, his knuckles already reddened and slightly bruised as he looks at you with a satisfied grin, “no one gets to call my best friend a bitch.”

“I was full on drunk and- do you really think I‘d fuck her sober?”, Rin tries to talk himself out of it and with a cold chuckle you throw your head back.

“How the fuck dare you talk to her like that”, is the last thing Iwaizumi spits before he throws his fist right into Rin‘s face with a deep grunt.

Another loud shriek escapes your lips and suddenly the anger and anxiety seem to leave your body and a huge wave of adrenaline hits you at the sight of your ex-hook up falling to the floor and Iwaizumi quickly moving with him.

For what feels like a whole hour but is probably nothing longer than a minute, you‘re literally frozen; your eyes the only moving part of your body as you watch your best friends break their knuckles on the jaws of literal strangers to them.

The following hour passes by in a blur. You can‘t really remember how or who separated them from those guys, or how you got yourself to call an uber and manage to get the four of you to your flat.

By the time the adrenaline stops making the blood rush in your ear, you‘re taking care of Matsukawa‘s wounds with shaky hands; the two others holding ice packs to their faces to ease the swelling of their bruises.

“Stop sighing so much”, Iwaizumi suddenly says, his dark eyes focusing the movements of your hands before he looks at you with a slightly softer expression, “we did what we had to do. And I‘m glad we did it. Those guys already looked so fucking punchable”, he explains and with a scolding scoff you press your lips to a thin line.

“You‘re back in Japan for how long? Two days? Yet already got yourself in trouble, a physical fight at that, Hajime. You‘re not your High School self anymore, start behaving that way, please”, you reply and hand Mattsun a plastic bag filled with ice cubes, softly caressing his bruised cheek before you stand up from your place on the floor.

“You got yourself one hell of a mouth while I was gone, huh?”, he replies cockily, poking the inside of his cheek with his tongue before he follows you into the bathroom.

You feel your body heating up at his words, the sexual tension laying underneath the surface slowly finding its way to you again and with a soft sigh, you ignore the brunette.

“How was I supposed to let him say all those things to you and not do anything, Y/N?”, Iwaizumi replies, a pouty word of gratitude leaving his lips when you take his big hand into yours and start cleaning up the blood on his bruised knuckles.

You try your best to stop your thoughts from wandering to sinful places yet images of those pretty, tattooed fingers wrapped around your throat and knuckle deep buried inside of your cunt have already filled your mind by the time you lower your gaze from his face.

“I‘m used to-”, “That does not make it okay, Y/N”, your best friend suddenly says, taking your chin in between his fingers to lift your head and look at you with those beautiful, dark green eyes.

“You deserve so, so much better and I‘m glad I can finally tell you this in person after all those years. Please stop letting douches like him take advantage of you”, he sighs, taking your hands into his and pulling you a little bit closer to himself.

“It‘s that or Matsukawa‘s cock and I‘d rather have a stranger emotionally pain me than my best friend, so-”, “What? What the fuck are you talking about?”, Iwaizumi interrupts you harshly, your words obviously irritating him.

“After my last boyfriend dumped me a year ago I‘ve only had casual flings because I got tired of using my hand to get off and Matsukawa offered to take care of it instead. But then again, it‘s just a lot less complicated with a stranger than it is with your best friend, that‘s why I‘m putting up with shit like this”, you explain to him and walk back into the living room where Mattsun and Makki are currently busy with your leftover take out from the previous night.

“So if it wasn‘t for that, you‘d let him fuck you?”, Iwaizumi‘s tone has turned cold again, the softness gone and replaced by something a little thicker and more intense than anger. And when you turn around to look at him, you see literal jealousy gleaming in the green color surrounding his iris, basically leaving you speechless.

“Why do you even care, Iwa?”, you reply, dramatically throwing your hands into the air as his tensed demeanor sends you in some kind of haze of irritation.

“Answer my fucking question, Y/N”, is all you get in response; the brunette closing the distance between the two of you with a few small steps and it‘s the lack of space between your faces that has you realizing just how unevenly he‘s breathing.

Your heart starts slamming against your rib cage with rather brutal pace, your head spinning from the sudden adrenaline shooting through your body and on top of all of it you feel your cunt clenching around nothing like crazy as Iwaizumi’s heavy scent fills your nose.

“Yes”, you say and feel your voice breaking, “yes, I would fuck Matsukawa because why not? Hm, Iwaizumi? There‘s nothing else stopping me from it other than-”, “You can‘t and won‘t fuck him”, he suddenly interrupts your outburst, his expression as dark as ever as he softly pushes you against wall.

“I think this is the moment where we‘re supposed to leave”, Makki mumbles, pulling Mattsun from the couch before they gather their things and leave the two of you to yourself.

As the silence surrounds the two of you, the tension grows even thicker, heavier, more present than before and with every breath you take you feel yourself growing more and more aroused.

“And why is that, hm? I can and will fuck whoever I want”, you spit back, trying so hard ot not let the arousal get to your head yet the disgusting urge to submit to Iwaizumi‘s naturally dominant personality slowly starts overwhelming you.

Hajime chuckles deeply, his eyes lazily roaming your face, pressing his strong body even further against yours as your head starts spinning more and more with every second passing by.

“Iwa…”, you whimper softly, throwing your head back and harshly digging gripping the soft fabric of his shirt; the close contact makes you a lot more nervous than before.

He slowly takes a deep breath before he bends down to let his nose graze your jawline, and eventually letting his mouth find its way to your ear.

“Because no one can fuck you like I can, pretty one”, Iwaizumi whispers, his voice a whole octave deeper than just a few seconds before and you hate the way every single one of his words sends a single, hot jolt of arousal right into your core.

“And”, you hear him inhale sharply, his hands finding their way to your hips, groping the soft flesh firmly in his palms before he takes a short break and then pulls away to look at you again, “no one can love you like I can.”

At the sound of those words, your eyes snap open within a second your heart skips a literal beat.

“W-What?”, you whisper, your throat completely dried up, your head desperately trying to process what he’s just said and just as your body is about to fall into some kind of haze, you feel yourself drowning in a wave of anxiety at the thought of having misheard him.

“I love you, Y/N”, Iwaizumi says just when those thoughts are about to take over you.

“Ha-Hajime…”, you mumble; your bottom lip starts to quiver as tears pricker at the corners of your eyes, the first few finding their way down your cheek in an instant.

A few seconds of silence pass in which you two just look at each other, Iwaizumi’s pupils blown out, cheeks tinted in the deepest shade of red and plump lips parted as he also tries to understand what just happened.

After all these years of imagining what it might be like to hear these kind of words from the love of your life, it’s finally become reality and the longer you look at him, the lighter the weight on your chest becomes.

“I’m sorry if I ruined our friendship with this but I just – couldn’t keep it to myself any longer. When I was in America I had promised myself to confess as soon as possible when I’m back so here I am. Those men don’t deserve you. Neither do I but I would have hated myself forever if I didn’t at least try. So”, he finishes his sudden explanation with another deep exhale before he takes a step back, his glossy eyes wandering from yours down to the floor, “thank you for everything and please take care.”

And fortunately your body acts a lot faster than your mind because while you still try to process his soft, sweet words – the words you’ve been dying to hear for so, so long – you find yourself tightening your grip on his shirt and pulling him back into you with a soft sob.

“I love you, too”, you whisper against his lips, pressing your forehead against his as your eyes flutter shut at the overwhelming warmth coming from his body.

“Fuck, baby”, Iwaizumi chuckles breathlessly, wrapping his arms around your body and burying his face in the crook of your neck, “I’m one lucky bastard, aren’t I?”

You smile brightly at his genuine and soft words, the feeling of coming home – a place you’ve longed for literal years – slowly breaks down onto you in the form of waves and for the first time in a really long time, you don’t mind being overwhelmed like that.

“So that means that you’re mine now?”, Iwaizumi whispers, pulling away and taking your face into his big hands, the smell of blood grazing your nose yet easily gets overshadowed by the way he’s looking at you as if you were holding the whole world in your hands.

You nod and move further into his touch, enjoying the feeling of being so safe and secure in one’s hands after not even feeling comfortable with anyone in years.

“T-Thank you for loving me, Iwa”, you gulp harshly, looking at him with teary eyes at the memory of all those who had managed to break your heart in the past years.

“No, baby”, he sighs, pressing the softest kiss right onto your lips, “thank you for letting me love you. When I say you’re literally everything I’ve ever dreamed of, I’m not even exaggerating because that’s what you are to me. A dream come true”, those are the last words Hajime mumbles before he pulls you into a proper kiss; not giving you the opportunity to reply.

The kiss starts off slow and calm. As if both of you were still trying to understand that this was actually happening because despite the hesitant movements, neither of you can hide the intense hunger lingering underneath every soft peck.

Iwaizumi, just as usual, lacks the patience to keep it going like that, not even trying to take it easier for even longer as he pulls your chin down and calmly pushes his tongue into your mouth, easily eliciting a soft moan from you. Your fingers find home in his brown curls, pulling at the thick strands and finally making him grunt right against your tongue; the deep sound sending vibrations and sweet little jolts of excitement through your whole body.

You slowly feel his hands wander; first starting off caressing your back, groping the soft flesh of your waist as well as the fingers of his right hand softly digging into your skin and for a second. You allow yourself to fall deeper and deeper into the perfect feeling of his touch until suddenly a mental image of his most recent ex-girlfriend pops up in your head and you stop functioning completely.

Iwaizumi lets his lips wander down your chin, placing a row of open mouthed kisses on your jaw before he moves to your neck and pulls the sensitive skin into his mouth without wasting another minute. The feeling of his hot tongue on your skin has your eyes rolling into the back of your head as you desperately try to distract yourself from your anxiety‘s attempt to ruin this for you.

You let out a soft whimper when Hajime wraps one of his big hands around one of your tits, harshly groping the flesh while rubbing his hard, clothed cock against your thick thigh.

His deep grunts and needy touches have you ruining your panties in no time to the point where the lacey fabric is literally sticking to your hot flesh in a rather uncomfortable way.

“Need you, baby”, Iwaizumi grunts, the movements of his hips rather sloppy and rushed yet so, so genuine and sweet, you can‘t help but smile softly.

“You got me, Haji”, you reply and take his handsome face into your hands, caressing his cheeks with your thumbs, “I‘m all yours.”

“Fuck, baby”, he moans and suddenly pulls away, his hands finding their way to the hem of your dress before he meets your eyes and wordlessly asks for your consent.

You give him a quick nod, pushing the voice of your anxiety all the way to the back of your head as Hajime slowly pushes the fabric up your thighs, revealing more and more skin before his eyes roll into the back of his eyes at the sight of your black lace panties.

He doesn‘t waste much time; quickly pulling the rest of it over your head and then taking a whole step back to let his greedy eyes roam your body with lust and nothing but adoration.

And when you realize your current, exposed state you take a deep breath to hold those insecurities back, however they‘re a lot faster than you are.

You nervously try to cover your naked body with your arms. Just the thought of him finding you and your body disgusting breaks your heart into pieces and with shivers of shame rushing down your spine, you lower your gaze.

“L-Look, I know it‘s not what you‘re used to and I- you don‘t have to touch me. I can just suck your cock or give you a handjob if you feel more comfortable that way”, you say, your voice a mere whisper and eventually breaking at the end when you give in to the tears.

“Baby…”, Iwaizumi sighs, pain evident in the tone of his voice. He calmly takes your wrists into his big hands before he pulls your arms away from your body, softly asking you to look at him and after what feels like an eternity, you manage to lift your head only to be met with nothing but warm, dark green eyes.

“You‘re fucking perfect”, he whispers and places a tiny little kiss on your lips, leaving you longing for more as he pulls away right afterwards, “there‘s literally nothing I would change about you.”

At the sound of those sweet words, you simply cannot hold back your tears any longer. You look at Iwaizumi with a quivering bottom lip as you let out a row of soft sobs; digging your nails into the skin of his wrists because you simply don‘t know what else to do.

For the first time in your life, your brain isn‘t protesting against a compliment and you know if it wasn‘t for him, there would be no way you‘d believe it.

“B-But your ex-girlfriends are the exact opposite and-”, “They don‘t matter, baby. You‘re you and it‘s all I could have asked for. I‘m in love with every part of your body and that has never been any different”, Iwaizumi interrupts you with his calm voice, placing his hands on your waist before one of them finds its way to your barely clothed ass.

“But-”, “No more buts”, the brunette says, a lot sterner and more determined, groping the flesh of your ass and then landing a firm spank on the soft flesh which has you whimpering into the crook of his neck.

Iwaizumi chuckles and pulls you into another deep kiss, sucking at your tongue, nibbling on your bottom lip all while his hands make sure to graze every bit of naked skin they can find. He pushes his leg in between your thighs, pressing it right against your cunt and without even wasting another second you find yourself grinding against the strong muscle. The fabric of his jeans rubs your throbbing clit in the best way possible, eliciting a row of needy whimpers from you.

You feel yourself soaking through the fabric of our lace panties and you know you‘re currently leaving a huge stain on Iwaizumi‘s pants but the pleasure clouding your mind makes it so easy to just ignore it.

“What a needy girl you are, baby”, Hajime mumbles, caressing the slightly dampened skin of cheeks with his thumb before he moves to graze your bottom lip and eventually pushes the digit into your open mouth.

Your lids fly open at the taste of his skin on your tongue, twirling the muscle around his thumb and then sucking on it softly, followed by some muffled moans of his name.

Iwaizumi watches you attentively for what feels like an eternity. His beautiful eyes wandering from the way you‘re rubbing your clunt against his clothed thigh to your perky nipples and then up to the way your lips look wrapped around his thumb like that and from the way his expression keeps growing darker and even hungrier, you know he‘s more than just enjoying your despair.

“I want to spit in your mouth”, he says, using the dominant tone you‘re oh so used to at this point and there‘s no way you‘d ever say no to him.

Something about being claimed in such a lewd way by the man you‘ve been dreaming of for years has you grinding your pussy into his thigh even harder; making sure to hit your clit with every rushed drag of your hips.

“Yes, p-please, Daddy”, you beg, not even overthinking any of your words as you part your lips and look at him with big, needy eyes.

When you notice the rather shocked and slightly overwhelmed expression on Iwaizumi‘s face, you gulp harshly, tilting your head to the side with your lips pushed into a concerned pout.

“What‘s wrong, Iwa?”, you whisper, way too scared of his response.

“You called me Daddy”, he replies and licks his plump lips, whereas you freeze completely at his comment.

“D-Did I? I‘m so sorry, Iwa”, the apology falls past your lips almost instantly at the realization because you know that not every guy is comfortable with such dynamic and even if Hajime definitely has a natural dominance to his personality, you should have waited a little longer before bringing this particular kink up.

“None of my boyfriends liked it and I don‘t like using it with completely strangers so I g-guess I just feel really safe with you and it slipped and I- oh, God, I‘m so sorry.”

You pull away from Iwaizumi with shaky hands, tears threatening to spill for the nth time within such a short period and you try your best to look everywhere but his eyes.

However, Iwaizumis seems to have other plans.

He takes your chin into his hand and pulls your face closer, nudges your nose with his own and then sucks your bottom lip into his mouth; making you whimper rather loudly.

“Say it again, baby”, he whispers, “tell Daddy how badly you want his spit.”

As his words echo inside of your brain, you let out a loud, high pitched whine, harshly trying to press your thigh further together ss the throbbing of your cunt becomes unbearable.

“Please, Daddy”, you reply, pushing his hand down to your neck and smiling softly when he wraps his pretty fingers around your throat, feeding right into every single fantasy you‘ve been imagining for so long, “spit in my mouth and on my cunt, I don‘t care. I just need it.”

“Good girl”, Iwa growls softly, “open up then, pretty one.”

You part your lips almost automatically at the sound of his demand, sticking your tongue out slightly and looking up at him with anticipation and such eagerness, if it wasn‘t for him, you would have never been as comfortable as this.

Iwaizumi smirks at you, keeping his grip on your throat firm but not too tight as he gathers his own saliva and spits into your mouth with a loud, lewd sound that sends shivers of pleasure straight down your spine and right into your core.

You can‘t stop your lips from stretching into a big smile when his taste coats the muscle of your tongue, swallowing it all in one go before you open your mouth yet again to show him it‘s all gone.

“Good fucking girl”, Iwaizumi praises you softly, caressing your cheek before he lets fo of your throat, “I got myself a perfect little doll, hm?”

“Thank you, Daddy”, you reply quickly, the intense urge to obey to his every word and submit to his every move absolutely overwhelming at this point, but you would never want it any other way.

“Look at you, using your manners for me. You‘re welcome, princess. What about a little reward for being so good for me, baby? Wanna sit on my face so I can eat that pretty pussy of yours?”, Iwaizumi takes you hand into his, intertwining his fingers with yours before he guides you to the couch, letting himself fall into the soft cushion whereas you try your best not to panic at his words.

Of course the thought of having his mouth on your cunt is more than just tempting but you've never sat on a guy‘s face before; the fear of literally suffocating him with your weight making it impossible for you to even think about it.

“C-Can‘t you just eat me out like this, Daddy?”, you whisper, looking down to meet Iwa‘s hungry gaze and stopping him from pulling your panties any further down your thighs.

“I‘m too heavy”, the explanation follows right away, not wanting him to think it has anything to do with him or his wishes, “I don‘t want to hurt you.”

“Baby, I want you to sit on my face so I can eat your pretty pussy. That‘s it”, Iwaizumi says, his right hand finding the clasp of your bra and quickly getting rid of it before he takes both of your tits into his big hands; toying with your nipples and attentively watching the way your gasps grow louder with every pull on the perky buds, “you don‘t have to if you don‘t want to but don‘t you dare worry about me because this has been a dream of mine for literal years. Oh, how badly I want to be squished by those pretty, thick thighs of yours – you have no idea.”

“I want to! It’s just that I’ve never done this before. A-Are you sure? Please don‘t think you have to want this to make me feel better, I‘m okay with whatever you‘re comfortable with”, you whisper, not trusting your voice when you suddenly feel Iwaizumi‘s fingers tracing patterns on the inside of your thighs.

“Enough of this, pretty one”, his words are accompanied by a firm spank on your naked ass cheek; the pain of the sting leaving your pussy a spasming mess and with a soft moan you tighten your grip in his hair, “now sit on my face or I won’t fuck you.”

“N-No! Daddy, I‘m sorry, I promise I‘ll be good”, you whine quickly letting go of him so he can lay on his back only for Iwaizumi to get rid of his black shirt; revealing his strong, well trained body and all those dark lines adorning his tanned skin to your hungry eyes.

It takes you a few good seconds to gain enough confidence to actually spread your legs over his face, your whole body shaking with nervousness. But once Iwaizumi wraps his strong arms around your thighs and pulls your body even further down to his face, you slowly start easing up.

The feeling of his hot breath fanning against the wet flesh of your cunt sends goosebumps down your back. And the sight of his pretty face between your thick thighs, something you‘ve always been so insecure about, seems to slowly take a place as one of your favorite images to ever exist.

“Look me in the eyes, baby”, Iwaizumi mumbles and sucks at the skin of your inner thigh, his tongue on your skin making more and more juices gush out of your already drenched cunt as you allow yourself to meet his hungry gaze.

And just when your eyes meet, Iwaizumi sticks his tongue out and licks a long stripe over the hor flesh of your pussy before he gently pulls your little clit into his mouth and starts sucking on it.

You let out a loud groan; the sudden stimulation on your needy clit sending literal shock waves of pleasure through your body and without even realizing you slowly grind yourself further against his mouth.

Iwaizumi moans into your flesh, the deep bass of his voice sending vibrations right into your core, making your cunt clench even harder around nothing and if it wasn‘t for the intensity of his stare, you would have looked away already. Yet just as usual, there‘s something about the way he looks at you which has you feeling at literal ease – even in such a situation.

“Come on, baby”, Iwaizumi suddenly grunts, letting go of the sensitive bud with a loud sound before placing an open mouthed kiss on your clit and landing a harsh spank on your ash which has your body jolting in antica, “don’t be shy now. Ride my face like the good girl you are, make me proud…”, he adds softly, his words encouraging you easily and with a sound of affirmation, you start grinding your hips to meet the hot muscle of his tongue.

The following minutes are filled with loud slurping noises, high pitched moans and deep grunts as well as more words of affirmation and encouragement all while Iwaizumi continues to switch between thrusting his tongue into your tight hole and sucking on your clit before he eventually starts fingerfucking you with two of his thick digits.

You can't help but throw your head back at the immense amount of pleasure; your body and mind slowly reaching a point of complete haze as you lose yourself in the feeling of his touch.

And by the time you finally feel the taste of your high coating the tip of your tongue, your grip on Iwaizumi‘s hair tightens and a row of loud, choked out begs fall past your bit swollen lips.

“Look at your greedy little pussy clenching around my fingers like that”, Iwa chuckles deeply, picking up the pace of his thrusts as he keeps his mouth way too close to your throbbing little clit, “and those pretty begs. Gosh, baby, you‘re going to drive me insane.”

“S-So close, Daddy”, you choke out, your eyes flying open when you feel a third finger joining the two inside of your tight cunt, the pain of the stretch in combination with the pleasure of your upcoming high making your head spin.

“There we go, that‘s my baby”, he takes a deep breath and starts kneading the soft flesh of your ass in his palms, “want you to cum all over my fucking face. Show me what a good fucking girl you are.”

And those are the last words your brain manages to register before you feel the first wave of your orgasm hit you. Your sight turns pitch black and then white for a good second, your whole body tensing up at the feeling of coil in your core finally snapping.

Your thighs are shaking, your breath continuously hitching as you desperately try to regain your composure and if it wasn‘t for Iwaizumi‘s touch on your sensitive pussy, you‘d stay in the beautiful haze of your orgasm.

“You came so hard for me, baby”, Iwaizumi grins and pushes his fingers into his mouth before you finally find enough energy to get off of his face.

“W-Want more”, you whisper, your voice raspy and breathy as you tell him your request; low-key scared of being too greedy yet at the sight of Iwaizumi‘s eyes sparkling with excitement, you know he‘s not one to deny you anything. He‘s never been, after all.

“How about we move this to your bedroom, baby? I‘ve been dying to press your face into the mattress and ruin that little pussy of yours.” You feel a jolt of excitement blooming inside your chest at his words, nodding eagerly before you reach for his hand and guide him down the hall to your bedroom.

“Do you want me to suck you off?”, you say when the two of you come to stand in your room, your eyes focusing on the huge bulge in his pants, which manages to scare you slightly with its impressive size.

You always knew your best friend wasn‘t on the smaller side when it came to size yet you still can‘t hide just how surprised you are by its actual size. And suddenly the three fingers make a lot more sense to you.

“Let‘s save that for another time, pretty one. I‘ve been dreaming about pumping your cute little hole full of my cum for way too long. I can‘t wait any longer”, Iwaizumi replies and finally starts unbuckling his belt.

You take the few seconds he‘s busy to let your eyes admire the beauty of his perfectly sculpted body. You follow the dark lines of his chest tattoo, take in the sight of his stone hard abs and veiny arms as you press your thighs even more together to ease some of the pressure on your cunt.

“Are you done eyefucking me, pretty one?”, Iwaizumi suddenly chuckles, casually pushing his jeans as well as his boxer briefs down his meaty thighs and exposing his hard cock for your hungry eyes to devour.

He wraps his pretty fingers around his throbbing length, the tip an angry shade of red as precum continues to leak out; making your mouth water at the mere thought of having him in your mouth.

“Everything about you is so pretty”, you sigh and look into his eyes, the genuine appreciation in the green surrounding his iris making your heart grow warmer before he comes to stand in front of you in all of his glory.

“I love you so much”, Iwaizumi replies calmly, taking your face into his big hands before he places the softest kiss on your forehead.

“I love you, too”, you mumble and get up, pressing your lips against his and sighing into his mouth when he pushes his tongue past your lips without missing a beat.

Just when Iwaizumi starts letting his hands wander over your naked body, he halts his movements and pulls away slightly, “my pretty little baby, make sure to face the mirror so you can watch while I fuck your brains out. I want you to see just how perfect you are.”

“Yes, Daddy”, you whisper, your lips stretched into a big, big smile as you move out of his strong grip to position yours on your knees just as you were told.

Your heart suddenly starts racing again when you bury your face in your arms, making sure to push your ass as high as possible to give Iwaizumi easy access to your glistening cut. The excitement in combination with the pleasure and deep, deep longing finally manage to take over your brain; shoving the anxiety alongside all those insecurities to the very back of your head and making it easy for you to put your whole focus on the tll male behind you.

Iwaizumi’s rough hands caress your bare ass softly, kneading the flesh and lightly spanking it a few times before he lets a thick drop of his spit fall right onto your clenching pussy; sending goosebumps down your back at the feeling of it sliding down your flesh and mixing with your leaking juices.

You feel the tip of his thick cock nudging your entrance, the memory of his size making you tense up subconsciously and just when you’re about to hold your breath, Iwaizumi’s deep, calming voice echoes through the silence of your room.

“Take a deep breath, baby”, he whispers, knowing you’re going to follow his orders just like the good girl you love to be, “Daddy’s got you, okay? I’m gonna go easy, I promise.”

You lift your head to meet his comforting gaze through the mirror in front of you and without another beat passing, you feel yourself calming down again; the feeling of being absolutely safe and secure in his hand making it the easiest task.

And when Iwaizumi feels the tension in your body easing up, he lines himself up with your entrance and slowly pushes his thick tip into your tight hole. You whimper at the delicious stretch, the pain easily overshadowed by the sound of Iwaizumi’s heavy breathing and little moans.

“I’m gonna go all in, baby or else it’s going to hurt a lot more”, you appreciate his warning because as he’s saying it, Iwaizumi thrusts the whole of his impressive length into your spasming cunt; pushing every bit of air out of your lungs and pushing you way too close to your second high of the night. You can’t help but whimper loudly, tears already streaming down your cheeks because of the beautiful feeling of pain and pleasure mixing inside of your veins from the intensity of the stretch.

Iwaizumi, as always the gentleman, gives you all the time you need to adjust to his size; only growing slightly impatient as you still whine softly after two whole minutes yet you’re quick to lift your head again with quivering bottom lip and teary eyes, begging him to just fuck you.

“Please, Daddy”, you sob, moving away from him in a desperate attempt for some kind of friction; your cunt spasming around his thick cock like crazy and you know you’re only a few thrust and some clit stimulation away from your next high, “please, fuck me.”

“My greedy little whore”, Iwaizumi grunts, pulling his cock out of you astonishingly slow with the sole purpose of teasing you, “you’re going to take what Daddy gives you, did you hear me?”

You moan as the feeling of his tip dragging alongside your spongy walls, your eyes rolling into the back of your head only to find your way back to reality with a couple of harsh spanks on your already sore ass.

“Good sluts answer when being talked to, pretty one”, he warns, thrusting his cock back into you with one quick snap of his hips; burying himself balls deep inside of your overly sensitive cunt.

“Yes, Daddy, yes”, you cry and look up at him with glossy eyes, “just please, fuck my stupid little cunt, please.” Iwaizumi lets out a row of deep chuckles followed by raspy groans in response to your perfect answer before he nods at you and mumbles a few soft praises right into your ear and then straightens himself again.

“Alright then, pretty one.”

Loud grunts fill your ears so beautifully, echoing through the thick air of your bedroom and in combination with the sound of skin meeting skin in a constant rhythm, you feel the exact way your body is slowly falling into the beautiful bliss of another high.

Iwaizumi fucks you fast, harsh and rough. There’s nothing soft and romantic about the way his hips are meeting yours in a steady rhythm; making sure to hit that sweet spot deep inside of your pussy with every single one of his thrusts as he continues to use his whole strength on your burning ass.

But not once do you even think about telling him to go easier on you; this iwaizumi the one you’ve been imagining for all those years.

It doesn’t take long for him to wrap his strong arm around your chest to pull you up, his fingers also finding their way back home around your delicate throat.

“Look at you, baby”, he groans right into your ear, making you open your eyes and meet your own reflection in the mirror, “you’re so fucking beautiful, I can’t comprehend it.”

You stare at yourself with your lips parted in awe, eyes falling to the sight of Iwaizumi’s thick cock stretching your tiny cunt before you go back to trying to recognize yourself.

Because for the first time in literal years, you don’t hate what you see and even if it’s because of IWaizumi’s strong body right behind you, you still feel this certain type of warmth blossoming in your chest.

"Feels so good, baby", he groans, throwing his head back as the movements of his hips start to become slightly sloppier, a little more uncontrolled, "so tight and warm, so fucking perfect", Hajime’s voice breaks at the end of his soft praise because of your walls clenching around his cock even more the closer you get to the edge.

You start feeling dizzy, your sight turning into a blurr and at some point you can’t even in- or exhale without letting out a shaky moan.

Iwaizumi looks at you with wide, hungry eyes, the feeling of your walls gripping his cock like a goddamn vice sending him into an ecstatic state and the longer he watches you getting lost in the pleasure, the more he struggles to keep his rhythm.

You’re mumbling incoherent sentences, desperately trying to tell the brunette about how close you are whereas the pleasure makes it absolutely impossible for you to form a proper sentence.

“Are you going to cum for me again, baby?”, Iwaizumi grunts, tightening his grip on your throat, making you gasp for air as you nod in response to his question.

“My perfect little slut”, he sighs, his hand reaching down to rub your hard, throbbing clit with two of his rough digits, “fucking do it. Cum for your Daddy like the good whore you are.”

And just like a few minutes prior, those words are the last straw and eventually make you stumble over the edge head first. Your walls start spasming around Iwa’s cock like crazy, your loud moans and soft cries are the only thing he can focus on and without missing another minute, Iwaizumi also lets himself get consumed by the beautiful feeling of relief.

Iwa hips still, his cock buried deeply inside of your tight sex as he coats your walls with his creamy cum. Your new boyfriend gets lost in the feeling of finally getting to cum inside of you after waiting for so many years; feeding the fantasy of getting to claim you in the most intimate way possible. He buries his face in the sweaty crook of your neck, his rapid breath fanning your skin as the two of you try to calm down from your intense highs. Your hand finds its way into his dark hair, massaging his scalp with your eyes closed and your legs still shaking from the aftermath of your breathtaking orgasm. Without pulling out of you, despite his own release leaking out of you and down the sides of his cock, Iwaizumi makes you lay down with him; just tightly holding you in his arms.

A few minutes filled with nothing but soft breathing pass by before you finally find the strength to move again; the sudden need to look at Iwaizumi’s completely fucked out face overwhelming you in the best way possible. And when you turn around to look at him, you’re met with a breathtaking sight.

Messy strands of sweaty hair falling into his flushed face, swollen lips and glossy eyes sparkling at you in a way you’ve never seen before and in that moment you feel yourself falling in love with Iwaizumi all over again.

“I’m so in love with you”, you whisper and caress the soft skin of his cheeks, loving the way he moves even further into your touch.

“Always and forever only yours, pretty one”, Iwaizumi sighs and presses his forehead against yours.

࿏ A/N: And here it finally is! My first x chubby reader fic!! As a chubby someone who’s been reading fanficion for a long time, I’ve always craved some kind of representation and now I finally got to join this side of the community and I’m more than just happy about the way it turned out. I genuinely hope you guys will enjoy this and find comfort the same way I did while writing this. Please feel free to leave any sort of feedback if you enjoyed it and thank you so much for everything.

#haikyuu smut #Iwaizumi x female reader #Iwaizumi x chubby reader #haikyuu x reader #Iwaizumi smut #iwaizumi hajime #haikyuu!! smut #hq!! smut #hq!! x reader #hq!! x female reader #haikyuu #haikyuu scenarios #kyovtani #💌.chubby reader #💌.for iwa lovers

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musicallisto · 3 years

Text

Ψ — 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐤; (percy jackson x reader)

~ 2021 start of the year event ~

@jorjawrites requested: Hi! Your 2021 event seems like a really interesting idea! Can i request number 13 with Percy Jackson? Im so excited to see what it is☺️

song: lilianna wilde - grind me down (jawster remix) | 𝄞

summary: A delicious smell of lotus flowers and unbridled debauchery came to your senses each time the bass pounded from the speakers... and your friends had manifestly noticed it too. “We’re never leaving this place, right?” “Never.”

author notes: I’m sorry this is really not as good as I wanted ughhh I hope you still like this!

word count: 1.5k words

warnings: we are collectively assuming Percy & everyone else are 18+ in this, despite it making no sense in the context of Camp Half-Blood, because the song is SAUCY and drugging kids is NOT my kink. pardon my approximative recollection of TLT’s events. + this is based on the lotus casino episode so gambling, and ... magical drugs?

“𝐒𝐎... 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐑𝐄 we doing tonight?”

“Is sleeping not enough for you? Why do we need a purpose?”

“Shut up, Seaweed Brain.”

“I don’t know. We could ask around, look for some clues? Maybe someone knows something.”

“Oh, great. Now, if I were a lightning thief on the run hiding Zeus’ magical lightning bolt after stealing it from the literal Olympus, where would I keep it? Yeah, this random Las Vegas casino full of mortals seems like a great place.”

“You don’t sound like someone who’ll get blasted by Zeus in a week if they don’t retrieve this ancient and untraceable artifact, Percy.”

“Thank you, it’s all in the confidence.”

“Stop bickering, you two,” you interrupted, standing between your two friends as you followed the bellboy deeper into the hotel lobby. “We’ll get a good night’s sleep, and...”

Your words halted, just like your steps on the rich, burgundy velvet floor, just as the young hotel employee pushed open the large, white mahogany doors before the four of you. Your eyes widened of their own accord. You were certain that you heard Grover gasp on your right. Even Percy and Annabeth’s heads snapped toward the immense, domed room in front of you. Game machines and roulette and poker tables stretched as far as you could see underneath purple-colored neons. On each side of the hall, dozens of guests gathered at the tables, abandoning years’ worth of savings to the hands of a blackjack game, gritting their teeth in unparalleled concentration at the arcades, all while sipping colorful cocktails given out by smiling waiters scattered among the crowd.

“I hope you find the diversions to your liking,” the bellboy simpered with a smile.

The grin that crept on your lips was unbeatable. A delicious smell of lotus flowers and unbridled debauchery came to your senses each time the bass pounded from the speakers... and your friends had manifestly noticed it too.

“We’re never leaving this place, right?”

“Never.”

And so you never left.

It was never about never to you, at least. Time simply ceased to matter, as though the vibrant colors and dulcet smells had annihilated all concept of hurry and dread. All that mattered then to you was to see if Grover could hit the jackpot.

“Come on, you stupid thing,” he hissed through gritted teeth, giving the slot machine a few irritated taps. “I just want three cherries. How hard can it be?”

Surely enough, the colored symbols turned and turned and turned... until they settled on two cherries and a palm tree.

“Of course.”

You had kept track of his number of attempts, initially... but couldn't remember when you had lost count. Nor how many lotus-shaped petit fours you'd eaten by that time, for that matter.

“It’s alright,” you reassured him with a pat on the shoulder. “It’s not like you’ll run out of money anytime soon.”

How nice of the Lotus Hotel and Casino to give you unlimited access to the vastest sums of money you’d ever seen to spend on their games... and what a revolutionary business tactic, you might have added had you been a little more alert.

But you weren’t, and merely walked away from Grover with a soft and somewhat shaky smile.

“Can I treat you to another flower?”

She had emerged from nowhere in an instant, carrying a tray of pink and white delicacies and a few of those bubbling cocktails you had been eyeing all night. What an exuberantly fast service, and how keen were they on making sure every guest was content and fed at all times, you would have thought had you been more attentive.

But you weren’t, so with a radiant grin, you grabbed one more flower and savored the sugar and its liquid aftertaste on your tongue. The corners of your vision blurred ever so slightly with each step you took, somehow getting more purple... but you paid them no mind when you saw Percy at a roulette table off to the side of the main hall.

“Any luck so far?” you asked as you walked up to him, steadying yourself on his chair, your hand a little too close to his shoulder. Clearly, the heat and moistness of the packed room were getting to your head...

“Luck? Y/N, this is sheer skill.”

“It’s roulette, Percy.”

He clicked his tongue, and a smile made its way onto your face as your heartbeat sped up. Of course, Percy and his infamous detachedness and snark, exactly the ones that attracted you so much despite your better judgment...

“Details, Y/N, details. What do you think? Red or black?”

He lifted expectant eyes at you. Inexorably, you leaned forward.

“All on fourteen.”

Percy raised an eyebrow and a corner of his mouth.

“Really?”

“Trust me.”

He did, without question. Appraising you lengthily for one more instant, he slid all his chips to the croupier, before resting his hand right next to yours on the table, almost to appease himself. Your breath hitched in your throat, head pounding from the music and the swirling spirals in the corners of your vision, as you eyed the wheel spin and spin and spin... until the ball landed on a red square. 14.

“There you go! That’s what I’m talking about!”

In a deafeningly triumphant motion, Percy grabbed his winnings from the table and leaped to his feet, right by your side. You could hardly contain your laughter then; but you fully burst when he shot you the most radiant smile you’d ever seen on his face, arms full of lotus-stamped chips and pure, unbridled adoration in his eyes. There was the childish enthusiasm you loved so much about him, and it was entirely thanks to you; your heart soared at the thought.

“Did you get a prophecy or something?”

“Just a hunch,” you mischievously retorted, your grin mirroring his.

You both had mindlessly stepped away from the rest of the hotel guests, who were all too absorbed to even notice the pair of teens and their outrageous amount of money. Beneath the secludedness of a marble arcade, cloaked in pink and purple lights, you both counted your blessings... each your own; Percy the chips between his fingers, and you the colorful hues in his sea-green eyes.

“So, what do you want?”

“What?”

“You technically won this money, so it’s technically yours. Or at least half of it. I’m not going to keep it all anyway. I want to give you a little gift.”

“It’s not a gift if it’s paid with my money.”

“Don’t start it! One Annabeth is more than enough!” he laughed, and your chest whirred to the same vibration.

“I don’t want anything, Percy. I’m happy with what I already have.”

Despite the dizziness that still shook your head, despite the bright, blazing gashes spanning your vision like pulsing veins, despite the sounds and music coming to your ears in stroboscopic and unequal waves, you felt more peaceful than you had for most of the quest. Percy’s gaze was surprisingly tender on yours, as though he discovered you for the first time right then and there, far from the hustle and bustle of monsters and Camp and cities... only his eyes on yours and your hands imperceptibly brushing together, closer and closer.

“It’ll be a surprise then.”

“I didn’t think you were the type to give surprises. I’m not even sure you can keep a secret.”

“Oh, excuse you, I’m an excellent secret-keeper.”

Closer and closer...

“I bet that I can make you spill all your secrets.”

“Bet all you want, I’ll be tight as a clam.”

“Really? Because I think I can guess one already.”

Closer and closer... his breath fanning over your mouth, your hand scraping the collar of his shirt...

“Percy! Y/N!”

A thundercloud passed between you two, killing the lights in a second. You jumped back as though struck by lightning, cheeks flaming hot and eyes elusive. Annabeth, striding towards you with purpose, alarm, and just as little disequilibrium as you would have expected from her, was enough distraction to ignore Percy’s erratic breathing by your ear.

“Percy, Y/N, gods above, why’d you run off like that? We need to leave. This is bad.”

The blond girl grabbed you both by the sleeves and dragged you into the light and agitation; and despite the newly growing nausea that rumbled in the pit of your stomach, some part of you was grateful for her decidedness, enough to hide your fuming cheeks.

Of course, you should have known better than to push your luck too far with the gods watching - and most probably laughing at your heartened hopes.

#mywriting #percy jackson #pjo #riordanverse #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson imagine #percy jackson one shot #jorjawrites

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anythingandeverything1d · 4 years

Text

Congratulations

“(y/n)” the nurse called out from the door. You stood up and walked over with an anxious smile. She handed you a clip board of medical information that you needed to update and then said she would grab you once it was completed and turned into the desk. You sat back down in the waiting room and flipped through the pages. Ugh I wish my mom was here...am I allergic to anything? I mean I don't think so but maybe Im just unaware of it..I don't remember having surgery-well my tonsils were removed but does that count? You were filling out the page to the best of your ability when your phone buzzed. You looked down and saw his name flash across the screen before immediately ignoring the call. You rushed to finish the paperwork and handed it in as the nurse came back. “Ready?” she asked.

“Yeah.” you followed her down the hall where she took your height and weight before escorting you into the room. You hopped onto the chair and anxiously tapped your foot as she checked your temperature, blood pressure, and oxygen levels. After finishing up she sat on the stool and smiled.

“So, what are we here for today?”

“Uh...” you looked at your feet and shifted in the chair. “I think I may be pregnant.”

She smiled and nodded, “when was your last period?”

“My period tends to be irregular but the last one I had recored was around two months ago.”

“Okay, were you on any kind of birth controls, or using any type of contraceptives?”

“I was on a birth control, am on a birth control but I missed a few days while I was on vacation which is when I believe this all happened.”

“Okay. Have you had any symptoms other than your missed period?”

“No, not really.”

“Okay. Have you taken any pregnancy tests at home?”

You nodded, your brain flashing back to that day.

*Tears were flooding down your cheeks as he grabbed his last hoodie from your closet. All you wanted was for life to stop. You wanted him to say its okay, to make a change in the relationship, to stay. You sat on the bed crying as he walked out the door for the last time, taking with him every once of happiness you had. You ran to the bathroom, physically sick from the situation. It wasnt until you were hunched over the toilet that you realized the box of tampons had gone unopened. Missing periods was normal for you, they had never been regular. There was a slight doubt in your mind though. You had never missed a period more than once, so the fact that you were going on two means something was wrong. You had been under a lot of stress though, the distance, the lying, the excuses, all of it. Wiping the snot running from your nose, you had gotten up, washed your face, and thrown on sweatpants and a sweatshirt. You had mustered the courage to drive all the way to the drug store, purchase three pregnancy tests, and drive home. You had gotten three, you wanted to be sure. You wanted to be positive before making any other decisions. You sat on the bathroom floor after peeing in a cup and dipped each end, turning them over so you couldn't see the lines. You set a timer on your phone and closed your eyes. The only thing that could've possibly made this situation better was having him here. Of course he was gone already but you could still dream right? When the alarm on your phone went off you anxiously flipped them all over. Picking the first up and squinting you saw the dreaded double lines. Picking the second one up: dreaded double lines. And the third: PREGNANT in bold. You dropped them all on the counter and threw your phone. Of course, of course this this happens. He leaves and I end up pregnant with his baby..just like the movies except he won't be coming back. The rest of the day had been a blur. You had kind of just ignored the fact that there were three positive pregnancy tests in the bathroom. When your friend Luke had come over, you had cried into his arms. Cried about him leaving, about the break up, and finally about being pregnant. “(y/n) if you have positive pregnancy tests you need to call him.”

“No. I can't do that. Im not doing that.”

“(y/n)...hes the father, he deserves to know.”

“I may not even be pregnant though..they come up wrong all the time.”

“Not this wrong though.. this seems pretty sure.”

“I mean I've been stressed lately maybe its just a hormone thing.”

“I think you should go to the doctor and check. And if you are then you need to ball up and tell him. Seriously he needs to know”

You had nodded and cried some more before Luke left. Then you had called your doctor and made an appointment.*

Now here you were answering questions about your sex life and body. The nurse handed you a cup and showed you where the bathroom was. She said the test would take only around ten minutes but that she would be coming back to the room to do a blood test as well. Great, what a fun day... You quickly peed in the cup, leaving it on the counter for the nurse and wandered back to the room you had been assigned. Your hands were sweating and you felt dizzy. Having your blood drawn was probably your least favorite thing. In fact, you fainted almost every time. You checked your phone and thought about texting him...instead you texted Luke and told him how terrible the doctor was and that you were going to die while having your blood drawn. His only response was “lol” and you rolled your eyes. Typical guy.. The nurse came back in with a smile and sat down. “Well it does look like you are in fact pregnant so congratulations! We want to do a pelvic exam and ultra sound today just to see where everything is at and then have you come back for a blood draw in the future.”

“Thanks.” you smiled and relief flooded your face. At least you didnt have to have your blood drawn today. On the other hand, you were pregnant, which was a whole other nightmare in its own. Not that you hadn't wanted and dreamed of having kids. You just thought it would be under different circumstances and that you would be married.

“Im going to leave this gown here if you just want to change real quick we can do an ultrasound and hopefully see where the little baby is at.” She left for a minute and you quickly changed, your warm body freezing against the chair. When she came back in, she had an ultrasound machine on wheels. She started with the pelvic exam, lightly pressing all around your pelvic region. Satisfied she got out a tube of gel. “This is going to be cold at first.” You had nodded and watched as the clear gel squirted out and the ultrasound machine rubbed against your skin. You watched the screen as she moved it around looking for the baby. After what felt like months, she found a small white dot looking blob and smiled. “There it is...looks like you are measuring around 2 months right now which makes sense to when you thought everything happened.” She looked at you and smiled. “I know it can be a lot to take in..I’m guessing this is your first?”

“Yeah...its just a lot I guess.”

“It is, but it gets easier. Want to hear the baby’s heartbeat?”

You smiled and nodded. She pressed a button and you heard soft thumps. Tears slipped out of the corner of your eye and you wiped them away. “Thats pretty cool.”

She smiled and nodded before handing you a towel. “You are all set to go, we will have the pictures at the desk where you can make your next appointment. It was nice meeting you (y/n) good luck on your pregnancy and congratulations again.” You smiled and thanked her before climbing back into your clothes. 2 months pregnant...theres a living being in there...my baby...mine and Harry’s baby...oh god, what am I going to tell Harry? At the desk you scheduled another appointment and the receptionist handed you a picture saying congratulations. You looked at the little pea shaped blob inside you and grinned. Thats mine...thats inside me.

Luke surprised you by standing at your car door with an ice cream sundae. “Soo did you faint? did you die? did you live?”

You laughed, “Yeah I lived. I didnt have my blood drawn at all actually.”

“Oh? Why’s that?” You took the sundae from him and smiled taking a bite, the hot fudge melting in your mouth.

“Because of this.” you waved the picture in your hand and he grabbed it his mouth dropping.

“Is that what I think it is? Do you have an alien growing inside you?”

“Lukeee seriously”

He laughed and looked into your eyes. “Okay okay but wow, a baby. That’s amazing. How are you feeling about it?”

“I feel like it hasn't sunk in yet....but that I’m really happy. I mean Ive always wanted a baby...why not do it now? I don't need a man in my life. Im a strong and independent woman.”

“That you are, but don't worry you will have me too. Im going to be a great uncle, its the best job anyways. But uh- are you going to tell Harry?”

You shrugged your shoulders and continued eating. “(y/n)...it is his baby right?”

You rolled your eyes and nodded. “It cant be anyone else's.”

“So then you're going to tell him.”

“Idontknow” you mumbled, your mouth full of ice cream.

“You have to..you know he would want to know.”

“Theres a lot I wanted to know and he didn't tell me so I’m not sure yet. I haven't decided anything.”

“Okay...” he gave in and hugged you. “I’m happy for you I really am.”

You hugged him back and smiled. “Thanks. I’m glad you're here...I’m glad I have someone to go through this with. And I’m so so glad you brought ice cream.”

“It’s okay. What are friends for right?” You nodded and jumped in the car after saying goodbye. You didn’t quite know who to call yet so you decided to just enjoy some time with yourself. You did the only logical thing you could think of after finding out that there was a baby inside you: you went shopping. You picked a local baby store and walked in, looking at all the onesies, furniture, blankets, binkies, and bears.

“Hi! Anything I can help you find today?”

“No, thank you I’m just looking.”

“Okay well we are having a two for one deal on onesies and bibs so make sure to check those out.”

“I will thank you.” you smiled at the girl working but she kept looking back at you.

“Are you (y/n)...the girl dating Harry Styles?” she asked shyly.

“I was dating him, not anymore actually.” She nodded and gave you the look, you know the one of pity and sorrow? You went back to shopping looking at all of the little outfits, there were so many choices. You also had no idea if you were having a boy or a girl..something told you it was a boy but obviously you had no clue whatsoever. You decided on a cute grey onesie with little animals on it...gender neutral. You also grabbed a cute binkie that had a stuffed bear attached to it.

“These are super cute.” the girl said while checking out. “There's a whole collection that goes with this if youre interested.”

“No, that's okay this is enough for now?”

She nodded and wrapped the stuff in a bag. “So how far along are you?”

“Not very far, only a few months.”

“Well congrats! I hope everything goes smoothly and I hope to see you back here soon for more stuff.”

You smiled and nodded. “I for sure will be back.”

You drove home, your phone blowing up the entire way with twitter notifications, instagram tags, and more. Inside you scrolled through it, only to find pictures of you shopping for the baby clothes. Your name attached to headlines stating you were expecting but not far along. Great...this is not what I need...how do they even know.... you were scrolling through more twitter notifications. Harry’s name was now being brought into this. Another daddy in One Direction? Harry Styles Expecting? ugh...this literally cannot be happening.. and then everything got worse.. Harry’s name and photo popped up on your screen as he called. “Harry?” you answered anxiously.

---

Part 1 of my new series, hope you all enjoy! Goal is to have another part posted tonight or tomorrow! This is kind of just an intro to the story, I’m hoping to have them be a little longer but let me know what you all would rather: longer and less stories (may take more time to upload) or shorter and more stories (updated a little faster)

Let me know what you think so far and what you think will happen.

xoxo

#one direction #one direction fanfiction #directioners #one direction imagines #Harry Styles #harry styles fanfiction #harrystyles #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines

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indi-indigo-loves-barley · 4 years

Text

The Beginning - Chapter 1

[Mod Arts: A little fanfic about how Barley and Indi met/got together. Complete fluff with a side of mild family issues. Rating: PG-13 Word Count: 1631]

“Barley’s chill,” Monica assured as she clicked a few times on her computer. Watching her as she did this, Indi bit her lip. She had been playing Quests of Yore with her online friends for years, bringing someone new into the bunch made her feel slightly queasy. What if he judged her? What if he made fun of her?

Indi didn’t have another moment to worry because suddenly the boy was there in a loud flurry. His one liner (that she had missed) managed to make both Kyle and Liam laugh; Monica gave him a pity chuckle. “Tough crowd,” the boy tsk-ed before acknowledging Indi, “so you don’t have a funny bone Indigo Girl?”

Indigo Girl.

There was no malice behind the words –no intent to hurt or belittle– he was simply interacting with her like he would any other person. Her chest unconstricted and she smiled slightly. “Naw, I do, I just have a little more class,” she joked back and he chuckled in return. In fact, everyone had laughed at her joke, including Monica.

“So why have I never met m’lady before,” Barley asked, raising a dramatic eyebrow and Indi’s mood fell. The light, fluttery feeling dropped from her stomach. This was always the elephant in the room.

“I-Im sick… can’t go out…” Indi stuttered out quietly. Barley’s face immediately fell with hers and he sat back, his mood significantly changed.

“Oh… how sick?” He looked like a lost puppy. Indi chewed on her bottom lip before speaking. Why was he so torn up about this?

“Just Anemia… but it can get really bad some days. I get dizzy spells, bouts of random tiredness, random upset stomachs, and exercise is a bitch. My moms have decided it’s easier to keep me inside.” His face seemed to lighten a degree, but not back to its original state.

“Forever,” Kyle snorted out. The word hung in the air and Indi sucked on her bottom lip harder, she could see the cogs working in Barley’s head. She could see the moment he realized she had pretty much never seen the outside world.

“Well I get out for doctors appointments…” she finally spoke up.

“Enough of the chatter,” Monica finally chimed in looking bored. Indi knew it was an act, Monica was like an older sister to her, they would always look out for each other. “I wanna play some Quests of Yore.”

“Oh, of course,” Indi piped up, grateful for the distraction, “this new campaign is gonna put y’all through it!” She started pulling out her Quests of Yore journal and flipping through it, till she landed on her newest writing. “Sabotage, spies, amnesia, Civil Wars!” Liam and Kyle groaned, they never liked the complicated stuff.

As Indi started to DM the session she got a private message from Barley. Accepting the friend request sent along with it, she opened it. I’m sorry. She stared at the text as rehearsed words poured from her mouth. She stared until she couldn’t any longer because she needed to look at her notes for prompting.

~ ~ ~

The text was left unreplied to for three whole days. Barley had begun to wonder if he had said the wrong thing, if maybe she now hated him. It was late on the third day when he had opened the chat again to check –he always worried that his notifications might glitch and he’d never know she even replied– upon opening the chat he found she was typing. Suddenly she stopped, after a long pause she started again, only to stop. Sighing he turned off his phone and flung it on the bed, covering his eyes with his arm. Five minutes later the phone went off.

Snatching up it he turned on the lock screen to look, it was probably Kyle or Liam wanting to play online. He nearly dropped the phone when he realized it was a text from Indi. Immediately, he unlocked his phone to read it. What had she said?

I don’t know how to reply to this… I’ve tried for a bit, but I just can’t. Originally I had typed up this great message about how it was okay, and how it was for the better. But to be honest, I hate it. I feel like Rapunzel locked up in here. I don’t know what it’s like to be a normal… and that sucks. IDK why I’m telling you all this… but you seemed like you sincerely cared, so I thought you should sincerely know.

Barley drank in the text, he read it over and over until the words were burnt into his brain. How was he supposed to reply to this? He couldn’t just give her a throw away answer like ‘that sucks’, he wasn’t that type of guy. He genuinely cared. She had spilt her guts to him because she thought he genuinely cared.

And he was going to prove it.

Like what? He sent back.

Huh? She replied.

What normal things have you missed? There was a long pause as she typed up a list, but this time she typed furiously.

Stargazing, driving, going to playgrounds, hanging upside down in a tree, going to ice cream shops, just walking down the sidewalks.

Twisting up his mouth Barley stared at the text and honestly tried not to cry. This girl hadn’t had basic childhood experiences. She was a prisoner in her own house, not a child. Finally he texted back: What are you doing later tonight?

Why??? She answered back.

Just wondering.

That’s not weird.

Just answer me.

Nothing.

He smirked, this was it, he was going to help her tick off her list one thing at a time, starting with stargazing. Video call at 8pm-ish?

Sure?

Good, was all he replied before setting down his phone with a grin. Everything was in place for a perfect plan.

When 8 o’clock finally rolled around Barley started a call and Indi immediately picked up. “Which way does your room window face,” he asked.

“This is getting really creepy, are you gonna come kidnap me,” she joked back.

“No.”

“North.”

“Coolio.” Barley threw open his window and managed to scramble out of it, before Indi realized something was happening.

“What are you doing,” she was half laughing and half terrified.

“Climbing to the roof,” Barley grunted as he hoisted himself up. “There.” Refocusing the phone on his face he smiled and Indi gave him a real laugh.

“Barley, you are the strangest boy I’ve ever met.”

“Say what you must,” he joked back before settling on the northern hemisphere. “Are you looking out your window?” He watched as she shuffled around, and then he caught a glimpse of her room.

It seems lonelier than he imagined; white walls, neat bookshelf, the bed crisp and made, nothing on the floor (from what he saw). He stared a little too long, lost in thought and missed her words. She repeated them and he finally focused on the moment, but his stomach rolled.

“I’m at my window.” He caught her words this time around and plastered a grin on for her.

“Okay. See those five stars just to the right? They make a zig-zag line?”

“Yeah,” Indi breathed out looking up on her end.

“That’s Cassiopeia. And the right next to it, those four stars on the right, that’s Andromeda's legs. Ursa Major and Ursa Minor are out too, off to the left there.”

“I cannot believe you,” Indi suddenly laughed. Her voice held no tension, only great humor. “You’re trying to take me stargazing.”

“Well, yeah. I-I thought I could help you live out your dreams you know? Tomorrow we can hang upside down from a tree, and once I get Guinevere up and running we can go driving too!” Barley was blushing slightly, he didn’t know why, but he felt anxious voicing his plan.

“Oh,” Indi’s cheeks flushed and he noted how he liked that, it brought some color to her face. “I-I’d like that.” They sat in silence for a short time before Indi bit her lip and spoke.

“So, Guinevere?”

“Yeah,” Barley piped up. “Sweet van, automatic, roomie in the back. She needs a lot of work though; new breaks, the back lights are shot, a spark plug needs replacing too. Oh and I totally have to repaint her, tan is not her color.”

“Sounds like a real junk heap,” Indi giggled, “why did you even bother to buy it?”

“Her,” Barley corrected and they laughed together for a bit. Once the laughter died down he said, “I thought it’d be a nice summer project, you know. Make my own car, then it’ll really be mine. And so Guinevere was born.”

“No yet,” Indi corrected, “once you fix her up she’ll be born. And we will have cake, and party hats. It’ll be a grand birthday.” They chuckled together and suddenly Indi let out a big yawn. “Whelp, that’s my cue for sleep, I have to make sure I get what I can. It helps to be rested.”

“Of course,” Barley nodded.

“Thanks. See you tomorrow after school?”

“Yeah! We have a tree to climb.” Smiling at each other they hung up. Climbing back down and into his room Barley grinned to himself. He was saving Rapunzel from her tower.

~ ~ ~

As Indi went through her night time ritual to get ready for sleep, she thought about Barley. Why was he being so nice to her? She had originally thought pity, but tonight he proved her wrong. There was no pity in his eyes, there was only a caring glow. If it wasn’t pity, then what was it? What made this boy care so much about her?

Lying down in her bed Indi stared at the ceiling for a while before falling into sleep.

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hirvitank · 3 years

Note

hey i hope its ok to ask but i saw your post about lupus and i had some questions. 2 years ago i found out i was super anemic and i also got a positive ANA test but i didn't have enough symptoms for it to be concerning at the time..but now i'm experiencing more and more lupus symptoms but mildly. maybe im overthinking but was wondering how your stuff started? was it immediately kind of evident or very very slow? thanks and good luck with all. i hope you are able to get the care you need💛

(Omg I typed a whole-ass long story and then my phone died, AAAAAA! Here’s attempt 2...)

It’s absolutely fine to ask! I’m not too sure if my symptoms progressed slowly or fast, since originally my health declined at 13. Back then I suffered from fatigue, joint pains and depression. I got better at dealing with it through the years, and I honestly don’t know if it could have been early onset Lupus, or just depression.

Either way, my ‘severe’ symptoms started about 9 months ago, after I had probably caught a virus. It started with the frequent swelling of my lymph nodes, vague joints pains, and extreme fatigue. Those symptoms spanned several months, then disappeared. I also started noticing the skin in my face looked weird, and I remember fearing I’d developed rosacea like my dad, or that I was perhaps just getting old and ugly.

When the symptoms returned after a while, they were much more frequent and more severe. I couldn’t use the affected joints, and there were usually multiple affected at a time. Then the breathing issues started. I had pain breathing in, as well as pain all across my chest. I had heart palpitations, my heartbeat was always elevated, and I started having fevers every single day. My inflammations markers were over a 100, and it was then I got referred to an internist.

I tested positive for ANA, and after several examinations it was determined I have inflammatory fluid in both my lungs and heart. I have pleurisy, as well as pericarditis and myocarditis. I urinated blood, and I felt pain in my lower back. I have frequent headaches, brain fog, as well as difficulty concentrating and separating dreams from reality. I often feel dizzy, with a strange static within my skull. I also have frequent sores in my mouth and nose. I was then diagnosed with Lupus by a rheumatologist.

If the disease started at 13, then its development has been very slow. I did have really bad hair loss several years ago, and I have urinated blood without a bladder infection before. If it started at 27, then it’s been an absolute wrecking ball and it has developed very fast in my case. All in all, it’s very serious, and if you recognise any of these symptoms I think it’d be a good thing to try and get a diagnosis. The faster you get one, the better. I already have organ damage, and it’d be great if you could prevent that. I wish you all the best, and I really hope this helped. 💜

#anon #ask #lupus

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waitinginthedarke · 5 years

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It Consumes Me

A BTS/Kim Namjoon Fanfiction

Summary: The minute he laid eyes on her he knew she was the one. But love is a battle of the mind and the heart, and when the voices in your head start winning, how can your heart possibly compete with a choice that consumed you before the very start…

Type: Angst/Love

Disclaimer: This story contains strong themes. Should a chapter be potentially triggering, it will be stated beforehand. (This chapter contains more direct reference to triggering subjects, most prominently EDs)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

Chapter 7

It was always mesmerizing to you, when you could circle the little brown spots on your arms, smiling weakly at the way they’d disappear when you pressed them like a button, before reappearing when you moved your fingers aside. It was like when your tummy grumbled and you would press on it hard, and like magic it would stop, leaving you with quiet; peace.

You were too busy pushing on the spots to notice when he arrived, tilting your head curiously as you distracted yourself from the cold with your new interest, a quiet voice in the back of your mind regretting your choice of clothes; thin, long sleeved, over-sized, black sweater over a thin tea dress with your regular converse. You’d forgotten a coat as you’d rushed out the door, having only brought your pre-packed bag with you which lay at your feet, and a stomach full of nerves.

‘Am I going to have to start bringing two coats with me everywhere I go, just so that I have one for you?’

His voice has your head snapping up in surprise, grin growing slowly on your face when you see him, and you hurriedly pull down your sleeve as you do so, so that you can stand up to greet him. Without pause you’re threading your arms around his waist, squeezing him tight as you draw the scent of him into your lungs, feeling your muscles weaken with the light-headedness that came with the action and thanking the powers that be that his automatic reaction was to do the same back to you.

He was so warm.

‘I missed you, beautiful.’

The night peeking out from behind his arm seemed to lighten with those words, tinges of white seeping into your vision in your delirious happiness, and you cant help but turn your head up to look at him so that you can catch his gaze, smiling before flickering your sights to his mouth and eagerly stretching up to touch a kiss to his lips.

It was like a movie the way you end up bent backwards, still secure in Namjoon’s arms whilst yours lay delicate against him, your lips barely grazing in the taste of a kiss, before he pulls away, the dreamlike scene scattering delicately with the minute frown that appears between his brows.

‘Are you okay?’

His voice is filled with concern, and the muscles in his shoulders bulge with tension beneath his coat, but the butterflies in your stomach were battering away too loudly for you to really cotton onto his meaning.

‘I’ve never been better.’

The answer seems to at least partially satisfy him as he lifts you back onto your feet with a smile, eyes darting behind you and tightening before he replaces his face mask back onto his face and proceeds to remove his coat.

‘Put this on before you catch a cold.’

You do as you’re told, having not stopped smiling at him since he’d found you, and feeling your cheeks hurt when instead of picking your bag up to return it to you after watching you put his coat on, he slings the pastel coloured beaten backpack onto his shoulder, before sliding his hand into yours and beginning to pull you away down the street.

Being surrounded by the smell and warmth of him had you distracted for all of 30 seconds, before you registered the feel of his stare on you, and you turn to see him smirking at you, pausing momentarily, before quickly pulling his facemask down and swooping down to plant a soft kiss to your lips, the taste of him being cola and cherries.

‘Now that I have your attention after you ignored my question five times in favour of staring at my coat that you’re wearing- with an adorable smile on your face, might i add…Have you eaten yet?’

The whole way through him talking you could feel your cheeks burning with heat where he’d caught you out for not paying attention to him, yet when he reaches his actual question, you feel the heat dissipate rapidly as you turn the words over in your mind in search of an appropriate answer.

But as it turns out, your body decided to answer him instead; your stomach rumbling loudly enough for him to hear it over the street noise.

‘Well, that’s one way to answer.’ He chuckles, seemingly paying no attention to the unsure look on your face as he switches your bag onto the opposite arm so that he could slip his arm around your waist, the move distracting you from the conversation as he proceeds to continue down the road with you, his warmth surrounding you the whole way back to his.

He’d asked you all about your day on the walk back, and even though you’d been actively responding for the most part and getting lost in his little tangents he’d take every now and again as he’d share an anecdote from his life- which you’d noticed he’d been much more open about since you found out about his occupation the other day- the moment he’d announced you were almost there, your senses had become acutely tuned into your surroundings, your mind wanting to process every tiny detail about the place he called home.

In fact, it wasn’t until you were stood before a large dark wood door within a building that appeared on the outside just as ordinary (if not a little cleaner) than all the rest, that the nerves of the situation you were about to find yourself in, and the reason you were stood there in that moment, really sinks in.

‘Hey, are you okay? You’re shaking.’ He suddenly comments, turning to you just before he goes to knock on the door, instead lowering his hand slowly to allow his palm to cup your cheek, gently lifting your gaze to meet his.

‘Im fine.’ You hurriedly murmur, offering a fragile smile, before letting it go and sighing shakily, ‘I’m just nervous about meeting the rest of your friends. I know you’ve said they’ll love me, but I’m still worried that they might not. I mean, im awkward, and shy, and nerdy, and-‘

‘And you’re funny, and brilliant, and beautiful beyond comparison, y/n. Believe me, …they’re going to adore you.’ He cuts you off, his face looming closer and closer to yours as he bends down slightly until his ungodly beauty is the only thing that your brain can process as your eyes lock with his.

‘I wouldn’t let you meet them if I didn’t think they’d love you; hell, I wouldn’t be stood here with you now if I didn’t think that I’d still find myself stood by your side in well over ten years’ time…and they know that, y/n. And when they know im serious about something, they make sure that they at least try to understand why.’ He says, smiling softly at you, before dropping a quick kiss to your forehead.

‘So,…yes, they might be a little inquisitive and imposing tonight, but I can promise you, its just because they want to understand why you mean so much to me.’

As much as you could appreciate that this sentiment was meant to relax you, the idea that you’d be on a podium for the entire evening as his friends examined you only proved to cause your anxiety to raise, your poor job at concealing your worry being easily signaled to Namjoon and leading you to suddenly have all thoughts vanish from your mind, finding yourself becoming over taken by the feel of his mouth caressing yours roughly and his hands clasping at your back as his torso presses desperately against yours. Your hands raise up to cradle his neck, a bubble of need surging up through your chest as the taste of him drowns out the noise of your thoughts, the excitement the feel of him beneath your fingertips caused leading you to want more as your lips begin to work harsher against his, all shyness being left behind as you forget all hesitation caused by your surroundings, shivering repeatedly with the feel of his hands caressing your body.

‘God, you’re intoxicating.’ He murmurs against your mouth, a breath of space following his words before he suddenly pulls back and looks quickly around you both, relaxing visibly when the only person within reaching distance was an old couple outside of their shop across the alley road, both shooting you disapproving looks before returning to peeling their vegetables.

‘Come on, if you’re going to be playing me like that, we should really be somewhere more private.’ He says, winking at you when you look up at him to object, before you realize you still had your arms tied around him and you hurriedly pull them back down to your sides, pulling his coat tightly around you when you notice that your dress underneath had ridden up to expose the tops of your legs.

‘I was just joking, y/n.’ he says quietly when you look back up at him, voice filled with concern, and you quickly plaster a smile on your face before gently tiptoeing to kiss his cheek, grinning when his face tinges pink in response.

‘I know, pabo. I’m just nervous…and also slightly dizzy after that kiss.’ You tease him, biting lightly on your bottom lip where you find you really were slightly tense at the evening to follow and noticing his gaze lock in on the move, his chest expanding suddenly as he draws in a deep breath, before he snaps his eyes back to yours.

‘You make me nervous.’ Is all he mutters under his breath before knocking on the door before he could hesitate again, his comment causing you to smile to yourself, becoming lost in your thoughts at its sentiment, this being the way you stay until the latch unlocks on the door and light from within suddenly spills out onto you.

‘Hyung, what took so long? Jimin has been waiting for ages- he keeps annoying me because he’s so excited.’

The sight of an irritated Jungkook relaxes you minutely, the casual look he was sporting making you smile until his eyes snap to you and he hurriedly bops his head in greeting.

‘Oh, sorry y/n noona.’

You grin at him in greeting, putting him at ease as he hurriedly scurries back inside, Namjoon guiding you in with a gentle arm around your waist and helping you remove his coat-although you put up a tiny fight where you wanted to keep it on just for the fact that it smelt like him- before he slips his hand easily into your own, and with one last reassuring smile, begins to pull you into the house.

First appearances show that it was all decorated and accentuated with the same dark mahogany, the expected smell of men not really being apparent with how neatly they kept the space- with the exception of the front porch area, which seemed filled with more shoes than a shoe store. Upon emerging into the living space your eyes immediately drink in the sight of the floor to ceiling windows that line the far side of the room, the scene beyond of the han river at night, twinkling with the lights of peoples lives in their own homes, the reflection of them upon the river mesmerizing you past the point of noticing the new body that enters the room just as Namjoon goes to pull you over to the corner sofa.

‘Ah, Jin-hyung. Just in time, I’d like to introduce you to someone.’

Namjoon’s voice pulls you back to the present as you turn in the direction of his attention, hurriedly bowing in greeting as your brain simultaneously registers Namjoon’s use of honorifics, offering a timid smile when you look back up at him, and feeling the blood drain to your toes when you see the man before you staring at you with a look of confusion and slight skepticisim.

‘Aish, Namjoon-ah, is this the lady you were on about?’

The man’s sudden change from intimidating confusion to relaxed joker almost feels like it causes you whiplash, but before you can let the feeling sink in, you’re focusing on Namjoon’s reaction to him, attempting to gage the appropriate response to him.

‘Yah, you didn’t forget what I told you yesterday did you, hyung? I made sure everyone was okay with her coming over for the evening- we had a debate about it for almost two hours!’ Namjoon insists, the disbelieving smile on his face signalling that you could relax with the humour-filled banter passing between the two of them: - that was until their attentions were turned back to you.

‘So…you must be y/n.’ the man Namjoon had called ‘Jin’ says, offering you a welcoming smile as he approaches you in polite greeting, looking between Namjoon and yourself and letting out a short, quiet chuckle.

‘I’m Jin. I don’t know who out of the others you’ve met yet, but you can refer to me as the friendly older brother- as well as the comedian of the group.’ He offers, winking at you, and the action makes you laugh in relief, despite the way your fingers were twisting together with your nerves. The feeling of Namjoon’s palm suddenly sitting warmly at the base of your spine has your attention drawing back to him, and you notice the slight tension in his jaw which wasn’t there before, the sight causing you to raise an eyebrow questioningly.

‘Its nice to meet you, Jin-sshi.’ You offer, turning back to the older man and seeing him nod his head at you, before he draws in a deep breath and looks awkwardly back to the corridor from where he’d came as though he’d become just as nervous as you and was seeking comfort in the nearest opportunity.

‘Well, I was just about to run to the store, so…I guess I’ll see you in a few.’ He explains, raising his hand as a farewell, before hurrying down the short corridor towards the door, out of sight.

‘See, that wasn’t as bad as you thought was it?’

You narrow your eyes at Namjoon’s playfully condescending tone, turning away from him as you make yourself comfortable on the sofa, and smiling cryptically as something enters your mind, and you watch him follow your lead, leaving only the slimmest gap between your bodies as he settles beside you.

‘And on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being the easiest person to meet and 10 being the most unsociable, how would you rate him?’ you ask, turning your head to look at him inquisitively, having to look up a little cause he was still so much taller than you even when you were sat down.

‘Uhhh…maybe…a 3? Perhaps even a 2?’ he offers sheepishly, chuckling when you hum in tense anticipation of what he would pose as a 9/10, but becomingly easily distracted by the feeling of his hand reaching over to find your own to offer comfort, the way he pulls it into his lap to gently trail his fingertips over every knuckle and line pulling a warm smile from you as you watch his inspection.

‘Are you nervous with me here?’ you ask quietly, drinking in the features of his face as his eyes narrow with the smile that pulls at his lips, ears reaching back into his hair line and his adams apple bobbing lightly as he draws in a breath; every movement he makes being mesmerizing to you.

‘I can’t help but be- you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, ever had the pleasure of calling mine, and I’ve brought you into an apartment with 6 other men, all of whom have their own charms, and undoubtedly they will have their own ways of making you smile, and yet for some reason I want to be the only one who makes you smile. I have this rage of irrational jealousy burning in my chest…all because I cant bear the thought of seeing you with anyone else. The human mind baffles…’

You watch him intently as he explains, subconsciously intertwining your fingers with his when he mentions wanting to be the only one who made you smile, not noticing the smile that creeps onto your own face…or the way you end up sneaking closer to him until your arms brushed and you practically had your chin sat on his shoulder.

‘I love your mind.’

The quiet mutter from you has him turning his head slightly so that he could make eye contact with you from the corner of his eye where he’d been too shy to look at you during his confession of jealousy, his mouth curling up at the edge in a smile causing the butterflies in your chest to riot before you find yourself stretching up to touch your lips timidly to his, not being able to resist the temptation presented before you, and biting your lip sheepishly when your brain catches up with the action and you pull back suddenly.

‘You’re such a tease.’ He whispers, the fire in his eyes that had been ignited by the kiss being accentuated through his grip tightening on your fingers.

However its just as he leans closer to you, holding your hand in place so that you couldn’t escape (not that you ever wanted to), that the two of you are interrupted by a cacophony of noise coming from the direction of the front door, causing you to pull back from him a little, being stopped from going too far by his grip on your hand, and you look up at him worriedly, fear twinging through your veins momentarily, before you see the sultry look in his eyes and your heart reverts from panic mode, turning your automatic reaction into a shakyily shy smile- but not before you’d already watched his expression flicker from sultry to surprised, before finally settling on confusion with the hint of resolution.

‘Hey Namjoon-ah! Jin said your friend was here already, can we meet-‘

Upon hearing the voice you’d already started to your feet, being stood ready for inspection by the time the owner of the voice emerged into the room and watching him trail off when his sights land on you.

As you inspect the first guy, two others trail in behind him, all of their eyes immediately locking onto you and you cant help but smile awkwardly as you all become caught in a bubble of hesitation, the pause giving you a moment to suss out what you could from their visuals.

The first guy who’d entered the room was a bit shorter than Namjoon, but you guessed older by his lack of honorifics, his warm brown hair being brushed back under his cap, the shade of which accentuated his cheekbones which in turn drew your attention to the strong line of his jaw and the statue like build of his eyes and lips, immeasurably precise compared to the proportions of his face. He was wearing simple clothing; a white shirt under a dark denim jacket paired with plain basketball style shorts, as though he’d just come back from sports practise- or in this case you’d guess ‘dance rehearsal’.

That was still gonna take some getting used to.

The first guy who emerges from behind him has a similarly lanky build, the two not much different in height, although you already found yourself mesmerized by the angelic softness of his face, his inquisitive puppy-like eyes as they dance over you and the child-like tilt of his head as calculations about you begin to dance behind his gaze. The way his fringe frames his face brings your attention to the bright blonde of his hair and the cuttingly sharp angle of his jaw, before your eyes wander to the impeccably white shirt he was wearing that he’d paired with black slacks, almost as though he’d just come from a business meeting; the look completely contradicting the first man’s outfit.

It wasn’t until you’re about to turn your attention to the final guy who enters the room a few seconds after the first two that Namjoon stands from where he’d been apparently bracing himself on the sofa, angling himself minutely in front of you as he addresses his friends, before slowly sliding an arm around to lay his palm on your lower back in comfort and to demonstrate a certain level of possession of you to the other men.

‘Hoseok-hyung, Taehyungie, Yoongi-hyung, This is y/n; this is the girl I’ve told you about-‘

‘You mean the girl you haven’t stopped telling us about for the past 24 hours since you broke it to us that she was coming to stay for the night?’ The first guy cuts him off, smirking playfully at the man beside you, before he approaches you with ease and offers you a tiny bow in greeting.

‘It’s very nice to meet you, y/n. I hope you don’t mind the mess, its Namjoon’s fault.’ He comments, the tiny quip making you chuckle as your eyes dart to the pile of books in the corner next to the bookcase (note: not ON the bookcase, despite there being space), and remembering the few shoes in disarray out in the hall.

Its only then, as the two begin to joke around- a few shoves being given and received- and the conversation beginning to go off on a tangent, that your gaze moves to the final person who had arrived with the little entourage…

…and you find him looking right back at you, with an unreadably dark expression.

So this would be the 10.

(T.B.C)

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hitchell-mope · 5 years

Text

Just put on the movie

And there we go. The dedication is there.

Oh god the rapping.

My palms will be bloody by the time this is over.

But I like the parallels to the first movie

To much auto tune

There goes my heart Disney.

Oh lord that’s high

Bbys. Smee twins

WHY WASNT DIZZY THERE FROM FILM TWO

There’s my child Celia

MY BOY!!!!

I mean Mal has a point.

He thinks it through

I love him so fucking much

Loving Doug’s hair

Rat bastard. Rat bitch. Rat fairy (Adam belle Verna)

Fuck off leah chad Audrey

😍😍😍😍. This version is better then d1

SUCK IT PASTEL COW

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

Oh Evie love. Just tell him you love him

FUCK OFF YOU GERIATRIC BITCH

YES WE WOULD PREFER MAL TO YOU YA BITCH

I hate you Adam and belle

Ben and the other three are adorable family

Still hating Audrey. So. Fucking. Much

Love the purple limo

WHY IS TREMAINE NICE. IT MAKES NO SENSE

Bal parent vibes are strong

They shoulda painted the limo roof purple

Dying of cuteness

Proud fiancé Mal. Love it

Fuck off leah

Here’s papa hades. And the ham.

DRAGON MAL. WHOO HOO

Ah well. Nice while it lasted

NOT HER JOB PASTEL COW

So. Much. Ham.

Poor girl. Ouch.

🤮🤮🤮🤮. I still hate her and her geriatric bitch of a grandmother

Oh bitch please. First words out of your mouth were creel. And it ain’t abated

I’m supposed to be sorry for this sad act? I don’t think so

So. Much. Rapping

Oh. SPARE ME WOMAN

Still theft. Throw her on the isle with her grandmother

Lonely and friendless. Because Mal is so much better then you ya limp noodle

Gotta be bad on the back

YOU DESERVE A SLAP AROUND THE FACE YOU SPOILED BRAT

Seriously though. The actual singing is better then the rapping. So gotta give satah her dues

Fuck off grown ups.

YOU PUT THEN THERE IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACD

Blue bitch. Just like always belle

Ok. People. You can see it’s hurting bal to do this. KILL THE BEAST

DONT CRY BABY BOY. PLEASE. LAST TIME ALMOST KILLED ME

Murder. The fucking. Parents

Evie. Evie’s sensible. Listen to your sister Mal.

And here comes the guilt. Like always. The narrative blames Mal

That darn cake

Ah. Pain. Hug them now

And jump scare

Oh god. Shut up Audrey. You’re a sore loser

Eh. The prosthesis look ok

Audrey. Nutter. Ben was more then ready to start the honeymoon when Mal was a dragon. Do you really think a hag would stop him?

😂😂😂😂

Oh boy

That’s a lie and you know it bluey.

At least the bikes have an explanation

Why the red for Evie though

And the mutt speaks

Fuck off Chad. I hate you so much

This bitch again

So shrieky.

Kiss ass

Real original

Jump Jane jump!

So many neck cricks

No one tells him anything

Cella’s right Mal

Overly long gag. But cute

Awww 🥰🥰🥰🥰. At least he’s a good dad

Nice reference

And the fear mongering begins.

And here’s the cryptid. He shoulda died in it’s going down

Psycho bitch pirate whore

Cella’s a troll and I love it

The vehicle needs an oil change

At least he’s sleeping. Though that position can not be comfortable

At long last the reveal.

He’s funny. And hot. (I can see where @mochacake2016 is coming from)

We know! We know

And here’s the music

😂😂😂😂.

He’s got a point

Ok.

THERES NO PHONES ON THE ISLAND QUEEN MAL

She actually sounds like jade west here

So far. Besides the proposal. This is my favourite song. Mostly for Hades great looks. Great voice

And the tambourine

Would be better with purple and blue fire effects. But no. We can’t have nice things. They spent the budget on pirate whores make up

She’s got a point. They both do

LISTEN TO HIM

Proud papa

C’mon girl. Cry

Of course she told her sister

He’s a good king.

T-shirt should be ripped.

🤮🤮🤮🤮. Hate her so much

And. Here. We. Go.

Benny. I love you. But did you not hear what she said to Evie when you first met the vks. Of course not. You were lost in Mal’s eyes.

Oh god. PLEASE SOMEBODY GO AND MELT HER

Whore man is probably skunk drunk. Gil’s cute as ever though

Throw hook in the water. And keep it there.

🎶she’s back🎶

And there screwed

He makes feel physically sick

Uma. I love ya. But honestly. Mal owes no one anything. It’s not her job.

No it ain’t

Jay’s got a point

Oh honey

Hook. In the words of the irreverent Captain Jack Sparrow “if the bikes be crashed properly. You be crashed along with it”. Not you Gil. I like you

Mother hen strikes again. Uma ain’t buying what she’s selling

Pure child Celia. (I don’t use this very much but) Gil’s babey (it feels wrong to type£

Chicken arms. No brains. No wit. No dance skills. No rapping skills. Ya basically a walking corpse hook

The dogs giving me a nervous twitch.

I hate the pair of them so no. No sympathy for prince douche bag

Gil makes me cry so simply

Stab the pirate jay. Please. For all of us

Psycho bitch

I want. It. Dead. Brutally. Dead

And more music. If this weren’t Disney they coulda melted them yo pukes of goo and pour it down Harry’s throat.

Oh god

So she can’t count either. Just like her brother

Definitely cha cha slide.

Deep sigh

So much ham.

Here’s a funny idea. How about instead of a bloody pantomime. ACTUALLY FUCKING FIGHT YOU FECKERS

Synchronised armour dancing. That’s new

Oh for fuck sake

Ha ha. Save it for the sob story bitch

What’s next a kick line

Thank god I was wrong.

Hook should be suffocated under the armour right now. Put us out of our misery

Care bear alert

I had to have a flu jab today. And it weren’t as painful as every single nanosecond hooks on screen

Love the platonic affection (I hate the very concept of malvie. What did you expect?)

Mother alert

Don’t eat wild fruit honey

So cute. But so dumb

Oh. Phineas and Ferb reference

Awww babies.

Don’t you dare tell me Mal doesn’t care.

THEY FOUND DOUG

Uma’s so done with care bear bs

More singing. Yay(!)

Please. Remind me again exactly why this is a DCOM. Cause it honestly does not feel like it what with the backstory pirate whores entire existence and the choreography

How has evie not broken a leg in this number.

Believe me Mal and Uma. I feel your frustration they go together like peanut butter and chocolate spread. (Perfectly if you didn’t know)

Where is she going?

She knows how R&J ended right? Double suicide. Why the romanticism huh?

HE IS NOT A RAG DOLL! Though props to Zachary for not corpsing

How can you hate Doug. He’s adorable. Best straight couple ever

There’s ma boy. Rip Harry’s throyatvout plwae.

Ben’s always been hot. But this is definitely working for me.

Awww. Carlos helping his papa

Wet Ben. Yum

Awww. Janelos cuteness.

Love the beard. So good. 🤤🤤🤤🤤

Someone murder the man whore before I do.

He makes me wanna throw up. And I’m not physically capable of doing that

@rpsocsandcanonohmy. I get where you’re coming from. But I also get where Ben is coming from. Sunbeam did get him abducted. And man slut tried to feed him to sharks. So I do understand both points. Doesn’t mean you’re wrong though

JUST. EXPLAIN. HIS MIND IS BEAST ADDLED

Shoulda let Ben slash hooks throat jay. You’re slipping buddy

Mal’s eating crow

Hopefully he chad suffocates. Then she’s have done one thing that wasn’t completely worthlessly reprehensible

🎶feelings🎶

And it had to ruin it

Te-am work. As plankton says

Proud sister

Boys are back. (With dude and the mutt in tow)

YAAAAAAAAAY

I hate happy harry. But I do like happy Uma. Eh. Double edged sword

BAL THIRST. FINALLY

Shoulda gone with Janelos. Jarlos is from big time rush

Oh they’re so cute

Poor Doug.

DOUG AND GIL FRIENDSHIP.

So. Update. Might be like Mal. (Definitely loving Ben’s facial hair)

Yawning over chad. So pathetic

Her seat from him douchey mcuseless

Poor Janey

Cats outta the bag

Once again. I kinda understand all points. Yeah Mal shouldn’t have lied. But Uma didn’t really give her and choice. And Evie just kinda assumed. And no one really lets her explain anything.

Hooks still pathetic. Even hurt emotionally I still wanna punch his roger rabbit looking face (Sorry Roger)

Oh dear

Mal. Don’t apologise. You did what you felt you needed to do. And no gives you a chance to explain. Ever.

Yes. You needed to do what you could.

Excellent acting all around as usual

Evie. Look. I love you. Your favourite number seven. But WHY IS IT YOUR SISTERS JOB. WHY DOES EVERYONE MAKE IT MALS PROBLEM

Ha! Evie said it. She said family.

Oh fuck. Taken for granite

More singing.

Monster/story/invincible

I do want to stab Harry in the mouth with the hook

More flashback. Yay(.). Couldn’t they fill out the runtime

Flashbacks. TO THE START OF THE SO G THE FLASHBACK IS FROM. OH FOR FUCK SAKES

More dragon.

Audrey’s performance might make me a vegetarian

How is it not crushed by the claws?

Fire should be green

Yay. Auds dead. Please say yes?

The twins say literally one thing

From magical incantation to vaguely irritating verbal tick. Well alright then

Evie. Why do you sound so sad. It’s a good thing Audrey’s dying. The ultimate price and all that. You should be glad. It’s a good thing

Mal: he’s my father. Ben: shocked face. Me: makes a sound like a boiling kettle

Bye bye facial hair

Die slut

More eating crow

The in laws meet

Exactly hades. Exactly. Knee beast in the dick

God Ben’s so hot.

Bite Adam’s throat out please hades

Should’ve let Audrey waste away. And sent granny to Tartarus to meet her

OH SPARE ME YOUR BLEEDING HEART ROUTINE! I still hate you in a fundamental level

OH FINALLY YOU GERIATRIC BITCH

Nice little family moment

What the fuck is Evie’s dress?

Queen Mal has a very nice ring to it.

Sure you can. You owe them noting. You owe nobody anything

Jay has a pull back braid in his hair. Yay!

“Audrey would be gone”. You say it as though that’s a bad thing

“Insert woody woodpecker laugh”. Fuck you Adam

Compromise. Bring the vks over. And plop Adam Audrey chad anleah on the isle. Sink it into the ocean

Why didn’t Verna bring the barrier down. Oh yeah. Cause then she’d be useful

More singing

At least this takes place in daylight

I still hate harry

Push Harry in the drink please. IM LITERALLY BEGGING YOU

God I love Ben and Doug

Why the Charleston?

I still hate tremaine

Well. Jane. In ZM. You met Mal. She’s Carlos’s mother in this au

Giljay. It’s cute

So Harry makes me ill right upbto the end. Now he’s related to purple and blue

🎶a bitch is in the dog house🎶. And deservedly so

🤮🤮🤮🤮

Sweet little king

Oh boy

Whore has a turkey neck

This is the end. Good movie. With some unneeded bits. I’m gonna change a lot in ZM part three. And both dedications broke me.

#disney descendants #descendants 3 #anti harry x chad #anti harry x doug #anti harry x jane #harry x jay #anti harlos #anti malvie #anti haudrey #anti benrry #anti harry hook #anti audrey daughter of sleeping beauty #anti chad charming

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istheresomebodywhocanimagine · 5 years

Text

Non-Character

anonymous said: Hiii can you please do a Gwilym!Brian x Reader where the reader is really into Roger ( he's into her as well ) but Brian has a crush on the reader and they are outside the college laying in the grass looking at the stars talking about life and stuff? Thank you very much ❤️

(a/n: i’m not really sure where this picture came from after ben’s ig, i found it on google images. it’s where i find most of my pics but if this is yours PLZ LET ME KNOW i will credit you. same with every post!!!! i have a bad tendency to collect pictures without sources. im dumb ok thank u thas all)

“Are you sure I have to show up to this night class?” Roger lamented, nodding at Brian as he held open the door of the Student Union for the two of you. “I could just skip and go to the library with the both of you, I bet the lecture’s going to be shit anyways.”

“No, Rog, you need to go to class. It’s once a week, you’re not going to kick the bucket because of one little 3 hour class one day a week,” you admonished, giving Roger a warning look and trying not to smile as he gave you that same innocent, doe-eyed look he gave you every time he wanted something. He knew how to play all of your weaknesses, but you weren’t having it this time, no matter how adorable he was.

Catching up with you two, Brian nodded and pulled his knapsack a bit farther up his shoulder. “Y/N’s right. I reckon you should go, it’s not like we’re going to do anything grand you’ll miss out on at the library.”

“Thank you, Brian,” you said, smiling at him before looking back at Roger and resting a friendly hand on Brian’s upper arm. “See, the brain has spoken. Just go to class, mate.” You didn’t notice, but Brian’s breath caught in his throat as you rested your hand on him, and he mentally cursed himself for letting you have that much of an effect on him. He almost made an audible noise of disappointment when your hand did return to your side.

Roger pouted for a moment, then sighed and deflated a bit as he realized he wasn’t going to get anywhere in this conversation. “Alright, I’ll see you both tomorrow morning, right?” he asked, giving Brian a friendly hug before picking you up in a hug and making you squeal from laughter, your arms wrapping around his neck as he spun you around once. Sitting you back on the ground carefully, he then gave you a proper hug and Brian could feel his chest tightening as Roger whispered something into your ear that only you could hear. “And I’ll see you tomorrow night, love.”

You couldn’t help but giggle, Roger’s words making you dizzy as you looked forward to tomorrow night even more. Pulling away from the hug, he gave you a quick kiss on the cheek, then bid you both farewell as he jogged off to his night class.

After watching him for a moment and smiling widely, you turned to face Brian, who looked mildly uncomfortable as he looked off after Roger still. “You alright?” you asked, moving into his line of sight and snapping him out of what seemed like a mini-trance.

“Yeah, yeah,” Brian said after a moment, smiling bashfully and moving his hands to hold the straps of his knapsack. “Think the food from the Union is having a row in my stomach, I’ll be alright, though. Library?” he asked, desperate to change the subject.

“Well, it’s nice out now, so I was thinking maybe we could go over to the park instead? It’s quiet there, and we’d be able to do all of our studying still.” You gave Brian a semi-concerned look, then glanced down at the park for a moment before looking back at him. “If your stomach is upset, maybe some fresh air would be better for you anyways?”

Brian mulled over the thought for a moment, mainly so he’d forget about Roger and just focus on you. After a moment, he nodded. “I can’t say no to nature.”

“I know,” you giggled, grinning widely as you held out your arm for him, which he took carefully. As you started walking towards the park, which was just down the hill, you kept talking, which allowed Brian to remind himself not to read too much into you knowing personal things about his life. You were his friend, not his girlfriend. Not his girlfriend. “I think I’ll stay in London, I haven’t much to do back in my hometown that’s worth moving for. Maybe I’ll get a second or third job… What are your plans for the summer break, Bri?”

“Me?” Brian asked, pulling himself out of his self-pitying state and standing up a bit straighter as he thought about it. “I’ve decided I’ll stay in London too. But I think I’ll only get a second job, and I suppose that’s all you should do too. Otherwise, how would we all get to spend time together?” He knew he wanted to say you and I, but he forced himself to say ‘we all,’ more for his heart’s benefit than anything.

You laughed at the thought, and as you neared an empty picnic bench at the park, you looked up at him with a teasing look on your face. “What if I don’t want to spend time with you all? Sometimes, you chaps get on my nerves, honestly. I think maybe I’ll take a break from you lot this summer.”

“Ouch,” Brian feigned hurt, laughing as he sat across from you on the picnic table and started unpacking his bag. As you did the same, he glanced at you for a moment and his heart skipped a beat at how happy you looked, surrounded by grass and trees, by air, and by him. He wanted so badly for you to look up and realize the same thing, but you were preoccupied with your books, so he chewed on his lip anxiously before looking back down and trying to focus on what was in front of him.

You both got most of your work knocked out by the time the sun was setting, so you decided to call it a night with the studying and instead just talk, since it was still nice out. Somehow, you got on to the topic of your favorite childhood memories, and that conversation carried you straight into pure nighttime. Neither of you really noticed until you looked up when you were laughing at something Brian said and you were surprised to see brilliant stars adorning the night sky.

“Wow,” you breathed out, admiring the night sky and smiling in wonder as your eyes twinkled under the cosmos. Brian watched the reflection of the sky in your eyes, smiling softly to himself at how beautiful you were, the cosmos swirling in the blown-out pupils of your eyes and your jaw slightly slack as you marveled at the unknown.

“The universe is beautiful, isn’t it?” Brian asked, finally looking up to the sky and being blown away at how clear it was tonight. To save his neck some pain, he got up and stretched before going to the side of the picnic table and laying down on the hillside, resting his hands on his stomach and staring up at the sky.

“No wonder you’re astrophysics,” you murmured, still enraptured by the sky. After a moment, you joined him on the grass, laying right next to him and staring up at the endless universe, wondering how infinite it really was. “God, it just goes on forever, doesn’t it? It makes everything seem so pointless.”

“The joy of being astrophysics, yes,” he chuckled, glancing over at you for a second before looking back up at the sky. “The universe is a wild and wonderful thing. So much future, so much potential there.”

“Speaking of future, what are your future plans, Bri?” you asked, genuinely curious. You’d never really been able to tell if he was going to finish his Ph.D. or just drop it all for his band – for an emotionally involved man, he was remarkably detached from it all at times, which made him hard to read.

“I think I’d like to finish my thesis eventually,” he said, stretching and yawning. “Not sure when that will be, however. If the band takes off, well… might be a little detour along the way.”

“When the band takes off, will you guys remember poor little me? I’d like to be remembered once you’re all famous and glamorous.” You grinned, teasing him, but he nodded, taking you seriously.

“If you think any of us will ever forget you for a second, you’re about as daft as a doorknob.” That got you laughing and you hid your face, shaking your head as Brian grinned at you. “What’s your plans, Y/N?”

You subsided your giggles and uncovered your face, still smiling as you hugged your waist and considered the concept for a moment. “I’m not sure, really. I like living day to day, not really sure where I’m going in life. Brings about a lot of adventure when you don’t make plans, eh?”

“That, or drains your bank account,” Brian joked, receiving a playful eye roll from you in response.

“You’re so straight-laced sometimes,” you teased back, shaking your head and hugging yourself tighter. “Must be all the science classes.” Brian only smiled at that, both of you quieting and looking at the sky again. You couldn’t help but marvel at the beauty again, murmuring to yourself, “Incredible.”

“Puts life into perspective, doesn’t it? How no matter what we choose for our future, we’re all going to end up as the same cosmic dust we arose from.”

“Incredibly depressing, Brian,” you laughed, elbowing him gently. “You should have been an English major… I almost did, actually. We could have had classes together.”

“You, English?” he asked, raising an eyebrow but not looking at you. “Like, just English?”

“English Education. Yeah, I know. Me, a teacher?” You giggled at the thought, toying with the necklace that was resting on your collarbones. “I’m nowhere near that personality type. You’ve got that locked down, but I’m too harebrained.”

“You’re not harebrained,” Brian refuted, frowning a bit and looking over at you. “You’re just a bit all over the place. You’re a lot like Roger.”

He regretted saying that as soon as he brought it up, Roger’s name bringing a smile to your face and making him irrationally jealous since it wasn’t his name doing that to you. It should be him. He’d never forgive himself for letting you slip through his fingers, but it was too far gone to go back on it now.

He’d had his chance, long before you’d even properly met Roger. You were over at Brian’s every night, you did everything together. In fact, you two were the inseparable ones, and Brian thought that would last forever. He’d grown used to having you attached at the hip, so he hadn’t thought twice about introducing you to Roger. Never did he suspect that it would be your undoing.

“Y/N! C’mere, love!” Brian had called to you, beckoning you over with his hand as you’d stood across the room, chatting with a friend of yours you’ve long since forgotten. You’d glanced over at him, and a wide smile passed over your lips as you’d seen him watching you with a grin, a mysterious, shorter blonde man to his left watching you as well.

You excused yourself and crossed the room, reaching out and taking Brian’s hand delicately. He’d encompassed your hand with his and twirled you, eliciting a giggle from your lips before he pulled you into his side, wrapping his arm securely around your shoulder and giving you a squeeze as he grinned down at you, a wide smile still plastered on your face.

“You alright, Bri?” you’d asked, holding out your drink to cheers with him really quick. He’d clinked his glass to yours and lifted it slightly before taking a drink, then swallowed it quickly and cleared his throat.

“Y/N, I’d like you to meet Roger Taylor. He’s the drummer in my band that you still haven’t come to see,” he had teased gently, giving you a pointed look. You laughed at that and shook your head, then you’d finally looked over to the blonde man who held out his hand and smiled warmly.

You took his hand and shook it politely, smiling toothily at him. “Hello, Roger. I’m Y/N, obviously. Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too, Y/N,” he’d replied, his voice higher and coarser than you’d originally expected. You did notice that his eyes were a dazzling shade of blue, and complimented his shaggy blonde hair that fell over his face in disarray.

You reached up to take Brian’s hand that was resting on your shoulder, intertwining your fingers and letting your hands rest there together as you struck up a conversation between you all. Brian’s thumb had ran over your knuckles absentmindedly as you rested your head on his shoulder, and to the untrained eye, you two would have looked like a perfectly content couple.

But then you finally came to a Smile show, which turned into a Queen show, which turned into more nights at Roger’s and less nights at Brian’s, until they were practically all nights at Roger’s. Brian figured maybe it was his curse, as he’d tried getting over you with Mary, which only ended up with Mary in Freddie’s arms and not his as well.

But either way, you’d went from total strangers with Roger to his second half. It was like Brian was an in-between, a stepping stone.

“Bri, do you think Roger and I are a good pair?” you asked after a moment, your voice softer and a bit more vulnerable. Brian slowly pulled himself out of his flashback to the simpler days, then slowly went over what you said.

He swallowed hard. “Why do you ask?” he managed, fighting the tremor that threatened to plague his voice. You shrugged, looking over at him for a moment as the smile escaped from your lips and worry filled your eyes.

“I always think he’s too good for me,” you admitted, chewing on your lip nervously. “Like, it feels like he likes me, but at the same time, he’s so… Roger. And I feel like he could just be faking it for a quick little thing with me. He has so many options, so many beautiful, better options.”

Brian couldn’t help but chuckle at that, albeit a tad bitterly. “A quick thing? You guys have been inseparable for what, a year now? I think you’re a bit safer than you’re letting yourself believe, sweetheart.” Looking up at the sky again, he swallowed hard again and tried to ignore the heat filling his face. “And it’s the other way around. If anything, you’re too good for Roger. He’s lucky to have you. I don’t think he’d ever try to fuck that up, or he really is mental.”

“Aw, Bri, you mean it?” you cooed, blind to the unrequited love that was taking place right then and there. You just thought he was being a good friend, and you were wildly misunderstanding, which killed Brian.

He felt his chest swelling, and not in the good way. He quickly realized he was about to tear up, and the salty tears stinging at his eyes confirmed that fear as he turned his head slightly away from you. Jesus, Brian, you’ve really outdone yourself this time. Crying over your best friend’s girl, just because you can’t have her.

“Yeah,” he managed to reply in a quiet voice, stretching again and scratching his neck. “Yeah, I really do mean it.”

“You’re such a sweetheart, Bri,” you murmured, still staring up at the sky and thinking about seeing Roger tomorrow night. You couldn’t wait to see him again, even just the thought of his beautiful eyes sending a shock throughout your body. He was electric, and you craved his energy tonight, but all good things come to those who wait.

Unbeknownst to you, Brian was letting the tears roll down his face silently, tearing himself up inside as he reckoned with the fact that it was never going to be him that you thought about at night. It was never going to be him picking you up in bear hugs. It was never going to be him taking you out at night, or staying in with you at night. It was never going to be him, whispering secrets in your ear, or him skipping class to spend time with you.

He was just the background character, a supporting act, and he figured it was nobody else’s fault but his own. Brian had dug his grave as a non-character, and now he had to lay in it.

taglist: @crosmopolitan @just-ladyme @rogerfxckingtaylor @fourmisfitz @shae-is-not-ok @moreinfinite

#gwilym!brian x reader #gwilym!brian imagine #gwilym lee!brian may #gwilym!brian #borhap imagine #ben!roger x reader #ben!roger #ben hardy!roger taylor #sad days #ben!roger imagine

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sherlollyandspoilers · 4 years

Text

Here Be Dragons, Chapter 3

Hey all! Please enjoy chapter three! Here is the link to AO3 if you prefer to read it there.

Molly was still unsure why Sherlock had dragged Mary and John out to his parents’ for Christmas, but she couldn’t deny that she was glad that the two of them wouldn’t be alone for the holiday. John had spent the first three months after the A.G.R.A. reveal at Baker Street and had only gone home when Molly had yelled at him about being the kind of man he claimed to be. Mary had told her that they hadn’t talked much the last three months since he had been home, but he had been there and had gone to every one of her doctor’s appointments with her, so it was progress.

“Dad, can I have a moment alone with Molly?” Sherlock asked as he walked into the living room.

“Of course.” Mr. Holmes gave Molly a smile before getting up and heading into the kitchen.

Things between her and Sherlock hadn’t been the best either over the last few months as he had thrown himself head first into the case and Molly seemed at a loss as how to bring him back to reality. He had spent so much time at Baker Street that their relationship was starting to resemble what it was before she had gotten pregnant. His time with Mina had been even less, only allowing her to “come and see Mrs. Hudson” a few times over the last several months.

“I put Mina down for a nap,” he said softly.

“Really? She hates naps.” Molly wrinkled her nose in surprise.

“She was exhausted,” he said with a small shrug.

She watched him for a moment, trying to gage his behaviors. “Are you okay?” she asked, setting her book aside. He nodded and came over to the couch, dropping to his knees in front of her. “I saw you smoking with Mycroft earlier.”

“It was an interesting conversation,” he commented. Molly raised an eyebrow at him. “Another time,” he told her. Taking her hands in his, he kissed them. “I am sorry for being so distantly lately.”

“I’ve missed you,” she said as she ran her hands through his hair and he closed his eyes, inhaling sharply.

“I’ve missed you too.”

Molly leaned in and kissed him, melting into his body. She tugged on his hair and he gripped her tighter, swallowing the small sounds she was making. It was the type of kiss you get lost in, not remembering where you are or whose around…not sure how long you have been there but not caring because it hasn’t been long enough.

But then Molly’s head began to feel light and she pulled back.

“Sorry, just a little dizzy.” She ran a hand over her face and tried to focus on Sherlock as she gripped one of the lapels of his coat.

“Listen to me, Molly,” he took her face in his hands and brought her eyes up to meet his, “I love you without question or hesitation and I am sorry for what I am about to do.”

“What…Sherlock, wh-what are you talking about?” She could feel her body growing heavier and was trying her hardest to stay awake. “Mina…Mina hates naps….” She felt her world spinning and couldn’t stop it. “Sherlock, pl-please don’t….don’t do this…whatever…it…”

“I love you.” She heard him say before her world went dark.

–

Molly felt like she was lying with a blanket of bricks on her body. She tried to move her legs but they were tangled together in something. She could hear voices but they were mumbled and seemed far away.

What seemed like days later, a small hand was patting her face gently.

“Mummy…mummy?”

Molly slowly opened her eyes, blinking to clear her vision. Mina was standing next to the couch, smiling at her. She saw movement behind Mina and heard angry voices. Molly shook her head, bringing into focus Mary trying to strangle Billy; it took both Mycroft and Mr. Holmes to hold her back. She sat up, holding her head, still feeling cloudy and confused.

“What’s happening?” she managed to ask. Mary stopped fighting against the two men and turned around to look at her, concern written all over her face.

“Molly!” Mycroft sighed in relief. “I was beginning to think this idiot had over dosed you!” He gestured angrily to Billy.

“I told ‘im my calculations were spot on.” Wiggins crossed his arms defensively.

“Where is Sherlock?” she asked as the pulled Mina into her lap. The rest of them stared at her before exchanging worried looks. “Where is he?” she asked again, her voice hard.

“I’m so sorry, Molly.” Mary walked to her quietly and sat down. “He’s gone to see Magnussen and he took John with him.” Molly stared at her a moment, trying to wrap her brain around what Mary had just said. She looked at her future in-laws, apprehension radiating off of them.

“You have to stop him,” she said turning to Mycroft.

“I’ve already made the call and my ride will be here any moment.” He looked at his watch and nodded. “I need to get my things around,” he said, turning for the kitchen.

Molly slipped Mina off her lap and hurried after him.

“I’m coming with you,” she said, grabbing a hold of his arm. “He needs me.”

“Right now, what he needs is for you to be safe…you’ll stay here with Mary.”

“Please, Mycroft!” she begged, tears slipping down her face. He gathered her in his arms and hugged her tightly. “We can’t lose him,” her were words barely audible.

“I’ll bring him home.”

–

Sherlock’s eyes flew open – if Mind Palace Molly was mad at him, he could only imagine how pissed his Molly was. He sat up and stretched. He was beyond board and had had nothing to do for the past week but replay Christmas night’s events over and over again in his mind. They hadn’t let any visitors in – not that he thought he had any visitors to be let in – and he hadn’t been allowed to call anyone. Mycroft had been with him when they locked him up, but he hadn’t been back since, not that he was surprised.

The lock on his cell clicked and the door swung open.

“Hello, brother-mine.” Mycroft stepped into the small cell, water dripping from the closed brolly in his hands. “Time to go.”

The brothers were silent as they rode in the back of the car and Sherlock didn’t say anything when he realized they were headed back to Mycroft’s house instead of his home or 221B. Besides the fact that Molly probably didn’t want to see him, Mycroft had most likely had to make a deal to get him released into his custody.

“Daddy!” Mina leapt into his arms the second he walked into the siting room. He fell to the floor clutching her to his chest. “You’re squishing me,” she mumbled.

“Sorry munchkin.” He pulled her back and ruffled her hair. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too!” she sang as she hugged him again.

“Is your mum – ” he stopped talking, looking up to see Molly waking in from the other side of the room.

“Hello Sherlock,” she said softly and gave him a tight smile, trying to hide her emotions.

“Munchkin, can I have a moment alone with your mum?” he asked Mina. She extracted herself from his arms and frowned at him. “Just a few minutes?”

“Come with me, dear.” Mycroft stood behind Sherlock holding his hand out to Mina. She nodded and followed her uncle out of the room.

“Molly,” he sighed as he stood up. He walked briskly to her but stopped mere inches away, sensing her hesitation.

“I’m…” she cleared her throat, “I’m glad you’re alright.” She looked up at him and took a step back, putting some distance between them. He clenched his jaw, trying not to let her see how deep that small step cut him. “Has Mycroft told you what they are planning on doing?” she asked slowly. He shook his head no, unable to trust his voice. “He, uhh, he says it’s an MI6 mission that will probably last six months.” He felt a cold shiver run down his spine but he tried to suppress it. The look on her face told him that she knew exactly where he was headed. “You leave in two days.”

“Will you stay with me?” he asked, holding his hand out to her. She hesitated before placing her hand in his.

“Of course.”

–

Sherlock paced Mycroft’s living room anxiously; Molly should have been back already. He looked at the clock on the wall, fifteen minutes before they had to leave for the airport. He wanted to shout but stopped himself, taking in the sight of his daughter sleeping on the couch. He smiled bitterly to himself and went over, kneeling next to her. He brushed the curls out of her face placed a soft kiss on her forehead, already missing her.

He shot to his feet when he heard movement behind him. He frowned when he saw his brother.

“Where’s Molly?” he asked when he saw the look on Mycroft’s face.

“I’m sorry, Sherlock…really, I am.” Mycroft held out an envelope and Sherlock could see his name scrawled across the top of it in Molly’s hand. He inhaled sharply and took the letter, waiting until Mycroft was out of the room to open it.

Sherlock,

I am so sorry. When I left Mycroft’s I had every intension of coming back and seeing you off. But being here, in our home, knowing that you would never be back in it, I couldn’t leave.

While I am beyond furious with you, I need you to know that none of that has to do with me not being there. It is because I love you that I must let you go now. I know this was your choice and that even if I had been there with you, nothing in the world would have been able to stop you. And if I was there with you today I am not sure I could find the strength to let you go even though I know that I must.

Thank you for giving me the most beautiful way of remembering you. I wish you were going to be here to watch her grow up, to see her become her own person. She is so much like you and I am not sure I will be able to nurture that side of her like you could, but I promise you I will do my best.

You were an impossible dream that became my reality and it was amazing while it lasted. You showed me more love in the last year than I ever thought possible and you have changed my life forever. You have ruined me for anyone else and I will ache for you, dreaming of your touch. I have always loved you, I will always love you, and I will miss you immeasurably.

I promise to dry my tears and get back to my life because I know that is what you expect of me. I will take Mina to the park and spend time with Mary. I will make sure John is getting along and that Mycroft stays busy. I will check in with Lestrade and keep an eye on Mrs. Hudson. We will be okay. I will be okay.

Take care of my heart where ever you go and I will do my best to take care of yours,

Molly

Sherlock held the paper tightly in his hand, reading it again. He had already had his last moment with Molly Hooper and he hadn’t even known it at the time. He folded the letter up and shoved it in his back pocket, storming out of the room, looking for his brother.

“We need to leave now,” he burst into Mycroft’s office. Mycroft sighed and sat down the pen he had been using.

“I am sorry Sherlock, but we do not have the time to drive back to Molly’s.” Sherlock clenched his jaw and ignored the way that Mycroft referred to his home as Molly’s.

“Baker Street,” he said quickly. “It’s on the way and I left something there that I would very much like to take with me.”

Mycroft stared at him for a moment before nodding.

#sherlolly #kate writes

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chelleaslin · 5 years

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Lukadrien June 2019 Day 13- Meeting in Secret

@miraculouschallenges

Part 4 in my Lukadrien story.

Luka’s head was whirling. It had been 4 hours after Ladybug and Chatnoir defeated the Akuma and freed him from Nawkmoths possessions. Yet, he still couldn’t wrap his head around what happen.

He remembered chasing Marinette to the top deck because she was chasing Chatnoir. She ran ahead of him and disappeared, he looked everywhere for her but he couldn’t find her. He remembered feeling suffocated, like he was in some kind of nightmare. Then, Juleka was there but he couldn’t stop panicking, suddenly though, there was a voice in his head.

It told him that he’d give him the power to forever keep his loved ones by his side, no one would leave him anymore.

It sounded perfect, almost too good to be true. Then came his end of the bargain, he wanted Ladybug and Chatnoir’s Miraculous’. It was then that Lukas foggy brain recognised the voice to be Hawkmoth. No, he couldn’t do that! He remembered trying to fight but to no advail, sunddenly, everything went dark.

That was the last thing he remembered.

He woke up at the feet of Ladybug amd Chatnoir, the pair were fist bumping. His head was ponding and his body felt a little tired and stiff, like he had just ran a marathon.

“W-where am I?” He slowly groaned as he tried to stand up. He stumbled a little only to be caught by Chatnoir.

“You were akumatised but don’t worry, your safe now.” He answered sadly, his eyes looked so pained and Luka couldn’t understand why. Lukas own eyes widen, Chatnoir words only just sunk in. Oh god, he let himself get akumatised, did he hurt people? The last thing he remebers was panicked then Juleka tried to help him and-

“Oh god! Juleka!” He cried, he whipped his head around everywhere but he couldn’t see her.

“Hey, it’s okay. Juleka’s your sister right? Purple hair?” Ladybug asked. Luka nodded. “The Akuma captured her but my Miraculous Ladybug would have taken her safety back home.” She smiled kindly.

“Thank you!” He croaked out, his eyes tearey. “Both of you.”

“It’s fine.” Ladybug smiled softly, “let me take you home-“

“I’ll do it.” Chatnoir butted in. Ladybug paused for a second giving Chatnoir an odd look. She opened her mouth, most likely to refuse his offer but he wasn’t taking no for an answer, “come on Luka.” He addressed to the teenager, still kneeling on the ground. Wordlessly, Luka took Chatnoir’s out stretched hand.

The second their hands touched, Lukas brow furrowed. There was something hauntedly familiar about his hand, the way it fit perfectly in his own. Chatnoir pulled him to his feet, they were now stand almostchest to chest. Luka looked down at Chat, was this hero always this short?

“Are you okay?” He looked at Luka with familiar, loving eyes. Luka’s head pulsed, he didn’t know if it was from the weird sense of déjà vu, The boy in front of him was giving him or the fact that he was recently akumatised. He stumbled a little as he closed his eyes, a dizzy spell over taking him. “Woah!” Chat gasped,wrapping his arms around Lukas waist and holding him still.

Suddenly every single one of Luka’s nerves felt like they had just been set alight. His heart started hammering hard and fast inside his chest that he was actually momentarily worried for his health. What was wrong with him? The only person that ever made him feel like this was Adrien and- Wait. Luka froze up, all his muscle tense. It couldn’t be, could it?

He took a step back and squinted his eyes at Chatnoir. Adrien’s hair was almost always perfect but he had seen it the few rare times it had been messy, and Chatnoir’s wild locks were almost spot on to that image in his mind.

On closer expection, he realised that, although Chatnoir’s eye were very catlike, they held the same soft glance in it that Adrien showed him, that he was showing him right now. He gasped as realiseation set in, his mouth gaping before he came to his senses.

“You’re-“ He was cut off my Chat, who looks very panicked.

“Yes, I’m going to take you home. Let’s go.” With out another word, he scouted Luka up in his arms and catapulted himself onto a nearby roof, ready to run towards the Seine River, to the Liberty.

The travel back to his home was silent. Chatnoir, Adrien, refused to speak. Luka didn’t have the confidence to start their heavily awaited conversation so he too choose to stay quiet. On another note, he really enjoyed being near Adrien again, the feeling of his warm body agaisnt his made his reeling mind feel confident tenet for the first time in weeks and the familiar scent of pure Adrien made him absolutely giddy.

They arrived on the top deck of the Liberty soon enough. Chat instantly let go of Luka, must to his complaint, and took a massive step back putting some distance between them.it was quiet for a few seconds, both boys avoiding eye contact but still trying to steal glances at the other.

“Adrien-“ The older boy sighed, sick of this little game already. He had gone so long without speaking to Adrien, he wasn’t going to speak what little time he had with him, not asking the questions that have been burning in his mind for the past month.

A obnoxious beeping sound interrupted him. Chatnoir visabley relaxed at the sound, making Lukas heart clench painfully.

“Meet me out here tonight, 11pm.” His rushed out, his eyes begging him. Luka relaxed as he realised that maybe all hope wasn't lost for the two of them. Luka nodded at him, giving him a shy smile, Chatnoir blushed under the mask before quickly making his leave.

This all lead Luka to know, 10 past 11, wrapped up in a big jacket and waiting for Adrien to arrive. His nerves were eating him alive, he didn't know what to expect, was this going to be a beginning or an end? Was he even going to come? He retrieved his phone from his pocket, unlocking the screen and checking the time, he was late.

“Where are you Adrien?” he whispered to himself as he squinted across the river, not figure in sight yet.

“Right here.” A voice spoke directly behind him. Luka yelped, whipping around to face Chatnoir.

“You fucking scared me!” he hissed, hand on his chest as he breathed through the adrenaline rush. Chatnoir crack up laughing, tears forming in the corners of his eyes as they fell into a familiar routine. Luka found himself chucking along with the golden haired boy, his loud laughs contagious.

“I’ve missed this.” Chatnoit softly spoke as their laughter died down. Luka stiffened up at his words, this was it, the talk. The atmostphe around them became awkard as they realised that this could be it, the end of them. Luka fearing that Adrien meant every word he said on that interview, that he ignored Luka on purpose and that he was only here now to tell Luka to get over it, because he cant keep getting akumatised, its making his life harder.

Adrien on the other hand, was terrified that he wouldn't became to fix his mistakes, that Luka was over it and over him.

“Why?” Luka found himself saying. “Why did you do it?”

Adrien stiftened at Luka’s sad and desperate tone of voice. guilt started to eat at him as he remembered Lukas akumatisation.

“I-I didn't mean to- they caught me off guard and I panicked, I was selfish! I just thought about what Father would say and made some excuse but I regreated it instantly and I wanted to make it right, I still do..” He looked up at Luka, fresh tears in his eyes. Luka’s heart ached at the sight of Adriens tears, he wanted nothing more then to wipe them away and hold him close. he might have the chance to do actions like that again by the way Adrien seem genuinely upset with what happened at the press conference.

Luka stiffened as he remembered that that all happened three weeks ago. If Adrien truly was sorry, if he really loved Luka, why wait it out? why make Luka suffer all this time, like he was nothing to Adrien.

“Then why didn't you?” Luka suddenly growled, tears forming in his own blue eyes, tears of anger or sadness he didn't know. “Why come here now? It’s been a month, Adrien, a fucking month!”

chat started to stammer at Lukas outburst, unsure what to say to make it better.

“My Father, he wouldn't listen to me. I told him that it was a lie, that I love you but he-”

“You love me?” Luka suddenly cut him off. his body was in shock, sure, he knew that he loved Adrien but they hadn't actually said the words to each other yet. for all he knew Adrien didn't have those type of strong feelings for him yet.

“Yes.” Chat breathed, shocked that Luka had to even ask that, was he that bad of a boyfriend? “I love you so much! Im sorry I made such a mess of things and I’m sorry I didn't try hard enough to see you and make things right sooner.” Lukas heart started to beat faster, after all this time, Adrien was finally saying the words he wanted to hear but how were they going to date now? a lot of terrible things have happened to him and his family since the rumours started. he cant risk putting himself through that again, he cant keep letting his family suffer because Adrien wasn tready to come out yet. he loved him too, with all his heart but he needed to put himself first.

“I love you too Adrien.” he smiled tightly back, Adrien’s whole face lit up. “but we cant do this again.” That was it, he finally said it. Adrien’s once happy face completely crumbled, his looked so confused and lost that Luka almost took it back but the thought of what the last month had been like but him right back on track.

“Why? Please! Luka don’t do this.” Adrien begged, tears freely falling over his masked face. “I’ll do anything. I’ll confess to lying, Ill tell them that it was all made up, please?” Luka sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose to try and contain his temper that he felt growing, Adrien wasn’t getting it.

“Even if you did do that! The picture of us kissing is still out there. how are you going to explain that?” Adrien was silent, he really didn’t know what to say. “The only thing to say is the truth.” Adrien paled as he clicked on to what Luka was hinting at. Luka sighed, lowering his voice to a gentler tone.

“I know your not ready to come out, I understand that its hard and I don’t want to force you to do anything this personal. but I can’t date a closeted person, no matter how much I love them. I already went through my journey of coming out and being with you, hiding and acted like I’m not thinking about holding you and kissing you constantly, it kills me. I feel like I’m back in the closet, pretending to be something I’m not to prying eyes. I cant do that to myself, I’m sorry”

Adrien was quiet as he stared out into the water below them. Everything Luka said to him running through his mind, along with a billion other things. “Perhaps sometime in the future out paths can cross again, that we might get our second chance.” Luka sadly choked out, their official break up only just starting to feel real to him. this was his biggest fear over the past few weeksand here he was, being the one to break them up.

“No.” Adrien suddenly whispered, Luka screwed his face up. did he hear him correctly?

“What?”

“I said no!” He shouted, he finally looked Luka in the eye. Although his green eyes were tearful, he looked dead serious. “I’m ready, okay? I don’t want to lose you and ,ore importamtly, I don’t want to lose myself. I’m sick of hiding behind a mask!” He started to laugh, although it held no humour to its tone. “Metaphorically or Physically, Plagg, Claws off.”

Suddenly bright green electricity crackled of Adrien’s body. The light was so bright that Luka had to shield his eyes for a second, but only a second, as fast as it appeared it was gone again. He blinked a few times, willing his eyes to refocus before he saw Adrien standing before him, the Adrien he remembered not the superhero.

Luka smiled softly at the familiar boy until he noticed a tiny black blob floating next to him. His eyes widen, his mouth gaping ever so slightly. What is that thing? It looks like a cat? He tried desperately to voice his concerns but all that came out of his mouth were strangled noises. Adrien looked at the creature next to him and giggled, rolled his eyes at Luka and grabbed his face and- oh, they were kissing. Luka melted into his touch, it was so forgein yet so familiar and he had missed it so much. He kissed Adrien back with all his heart, love and soul, hoping that Adrien could understand everything he was trying to tell him through the passionate moventmwmt of his lips. God, knows that if Luka was ever able to find his voice he wouldn’t never truely be able to explain exactly what he felt for the younger boy, their were no known words in any language, dead or alive, that could ever express himself with.

After a few minutes of sweet kisses and tender touches, the two teenage boys finally pulled apart.

“I love you.” Adrien croaked, it was only them did Luka notice the boy was still crying. He hurriedly wiped away his salty tears and gave him a loving grin.

“I love you too.” He whispered back, “I take back everything I said earlier. If your willing to try, this is want I want. Now and forever onewards.” Adrien’s face broke into a massive grin as he tackled Luka into a hug. He felt like the luckiest man in the world to be able to call Luka his. Luka was too kind, too sweet, too loving am just simply too perfect for him, he was out of his league! He knew that his mistake was one off and he need to screw his head on straight and start treating Luka like the god he is.

“I promise, I’ll come out to anyone. No matter the consequences, I love you far to ,Uh to hide it.”

Luka just smiled and kissed him again. After they broke apart for the second time, they just held eachother, both boys desperate for the physical affection.

“Adrien?” Luka suddenly asked. The blonde haired boy hummed. “Did I see a tiny floating kitten earlier or have I lost it?”

#miraculous tales #miraculous ladybug and chatnoir #chatnoir #adrien agreste #ladybug #Luka Couffine #Lukadrien June #Lukadrien

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lenin-it-to-win-it · 5 years

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just gonna rant about my health issues to no one in particular for a bit under the cut sooo

im just so fucking tired of being sick all the time like. its been almost 2 years now of actively Going To Doctors And Having Tests Done And Trying To Get A Diagnosis and fucking!!! nothing works!!! and i only have until the end of this coming school year to get it figured out before my insurance runs out otherwise im just fucked!!! because im sure as hell not gonna be able to afford a fucking mri every six months making 10 bucks an hour at some retail shithole but so far ive seen SIX different fucking doctors (not counting 2 ER visits) because they all just keep shuffling me back and forth like “idk maybe have someone else deal with this? weird lol” or like “have you considered that maybe you might have anxiety :) you seem stressed :)”

like yeah its a fucking stressful situation getting progressively fucking sicker for two goddamn years wasting thousands of dollars and reaching the end of a fucking ticking clock because almost every doctor ive seen is an incompetent jackass who does NOTHING but waste my time and money and then fucking condescend to me about anxiety like!!! yeah i probably DO have anxiety and depression and autism and what the fuck ever else but this isnt THAT

and the literal ONE TIME i had ANY treatment that worked AT ALL helping with my eye spasms (literally One of Many Symptoms that i deal with on a fucking daily basis that still manages to completely fuck up my life) is something i cant take anymore because it damaged my fucking eyes!!! possibly permanently!!! i already HAD issues wtih light sensitivity that this medicine made WAYYY fucking worse and guess whats one of the WORST things at setting off my eye spasms??? anything to do with fucking light so YEAH thANKS for that @ the opthalmologist who had me take those damn eye drops for two months straight, which other neuro opthalmologist said was bullshit when i saw her again, not that im letting HER off the hook either since she REFERRED me to that incompetent bitch in the first place and then had NO solution other than “hm well you definitely shouldnt take that medicine again, but theres literally No Other Treatment, maybe blow another $400 in a few months to come see me again so i can continue to Not Help You In Any Way”

and its getting wORSE ALL THE TIME!!! and the best thing doctors can think of is “hm well maybe wait a bit to see if it gets worse? and maybe then we’ll know what it is?” well its getting worse!!!! but they still dont seem to know what it is!!! like at first it was just my vision going out of focus for a few seconds at a time, then it was a few minutes, then i was having visual distortion (or maybe hallucinations? who knows! certainly not any of the fucking doctors ive seen!), then awful fucking eye strain headaches, then spasms in my neck, then my jaw, then my arms, then my legs, now all fucking over, and now i get sick and dizzy just by moving my HEAD too far or too suddenly and like at work earlier today i was just stumbling around for two hours bc there was too much pressure in my head and everything felt tilted and i was just grabbing at every surface trying not to fall with my head like on my shoulder bc keeping my neck straight was too fucking hard and i swear to fuckign god a couple nights ago there was this weird buzzing on the side of my face??? and like it felt like my mouth was moving slower than it should??? but i dont even KNOW if thats a Real SymptomTM or if i was just freaked out and tired and imagining things or if i really am just getting to be a paranoid delusional nutcase about my health because every little thing terrifies me at this point, like ive been coughing for a couple weeks and instead of being like “oh its a bad cold” im like “maybe now my immune systems fucked up too maybe this is A New Symptom” i literally cant tell anymore i have no fucking idea

and i dont WANT to think about all this All The Fucking Time but i do!!!!! i literally HAVE to bc it affects my life in every fucking possible way and i cant escape it like even rn the light from the fuckign computer is hurting my eyes and i cant even see what im typing half the time bc my eyes keep going out of focus and my teeth keep chattering and my head hurts or ill go to get a drink of water but then just Stand there for a few minutes bc i dont trust myself to hold a cup full of water and not spill it bc im having spasms or ill have to wear sunglasses at the dinner table bc my fucking idiot asshole dad got the BRIGHTEST possible lightbulbs for the dining room and i physically cant stand them

or like im already dreading having to explain all this shit to my professors this semester about how like “oh so i probably wont be able to keep up with daily readings, especialyl not if theyre on physical paper and i cant scale up the text because my eyes just spontaneously stop working and i cant read..... and ill need a computer to take notes, i can Usually hold a pencil but one time i had a spasm in class and flung it across the room and it was super embarrassing and i ltierally skipped that class for weeks because of it so id really rather not deal with that again.... and even though im a fuckign AMAZING public speaker like, state champion debate level public speaking, ill still probably get super fucking nervous and suck at any kind of in class presentation bc ill just be thinking about my spasms the whole time and wont be able to focus....... and ill have to wear sunglasses all the time too so hopefully thats not an issue........ and also ill probably miss a lot of class bc whether or not i can handle walking half a mile Varies Wildly from day to day and also i have a lot of doctors appointments and sometimes im on medicine that completely ruins my sleep schedule so you know... looking forward to a great semester, hope i dont completely fail your class”

and i have fuckign work tomorrow where ill have to deal with trying to pretend like even the most minor tasks arent painful and difficult and deal with awful btichy entitled customers complaining that im not SMILEY enough for you like the motherfucker who asked me how i was and i said fine and he was like “jUuUUuuuST fINE” like shut the everlasting FUCK UP with that ive met my obligation leave me ALONE my day isnt FINE im in awful pain and i HATE you and everyone like you or ill have to deal with my coworkers giving me weird looks while im having spasms or outright MOCKING me for them like the asshole that called me TWITCH (and a whore, but thats Another Fucking Story) or just not knowing how to deal and making bad taste jokes like when my teeth are chattering bc I Physically Cant Make It Stop like “haha are you chewing an invisible piece of gum lol” like no bitch im a neurological nightmare and my brain doesnt work and im Barely Holding Together would you PLEASE shut the fuck up

and most of the time i just feel like everyone thinks im a fucking freak like even just sitting in the waiting room to see the neurologist or opthalmologist or whatever and everyone else there is Old and im the only person even remotely close to my age there and even the doctors dont seem to take me that seriously bc of it like “oh shes young, cant be that bad, all these old people out here are gonna die like tomorrow so why worry about this girl, its probably just anxiety from being on her period or having a test to study for lol” like straight up when the movement disorder neurologist was examining me she was like “im not used to seeing anyone this young or healthy’ and i know she meant it relatively speaking but like!!! clearly im NOT healthy or i wouldnt BE here like obviously something is wrong with me and its ruining my life and its serious and id like it fixed thanks!!!!!

and i feel like No One Gets It like, obviously there are people wayyyy sicker than i am who suffer a lot more or people in similar situations but like. i dont Personally Know someone like that i can just talk to and like, of course i have friends who can Listen but.................................. theres a difference from being able to listen and being able to actually Understand and sometimes you just cant Get It unless youve gone through it like i really dont think ANYONE in my life has any idea how serious this is or how much it affects me and i know i cant expect everyone to just Always Think Of My IssuesTM but little things!!! like maybe NOT having the brighest possible lightbulbs in the dining room!!!! my brother NOT having his birthday party at dave and busters, which i had TONS of spasms at last time i went (and im even worse now!) AND the staff gave me shit about wearing sunglasses so now im nervous about That too or just! idk! people respecting and listening to me when i tell them that i Cant Do Something or that Doing That Thing Hurts and not just brushing me off or telling me im overreacting and then getting all shocked pikachu face when their dumbassery actually physically HURTS me and i get pissed with them for it!!!!

i dont think anyone gets how much it scares me all the time or how its Always on my mind and i literally cant think about anything else like. this could be the rest of my life. this could end my life. i dont know what i have. i might get diagnosed in the next month and have it completely cured, i might get a diagnosis and still be sick forever, i might not find out until its too late and i have LITERALLY NO FUCKING IDEA WHICH ONE!!!! ITS GREAT!!!!!!!! WELCOME TO MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!

#vent #rant #i sincerely doubt anyone will read to the end of this but whomst knows #besides it feels nice to just scream

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seasonaldepressionmp3 · 5 years

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tagged by @retromena fun fact i literally typed @/ximena before realizing that is not your url! anyway i havent done one of these in forever so thank you

rules answer 22 questions & tag 22 people you want to know better

nickname(s): vivi, viverz

zodiac sign: virgo sun, libra moon

height: 5′9″ ish

last movie i saw: im pretty sure it was john mulaneys kid gorgeous with my family

last thing i googled: jennifer beals........

favourite musician: such an unfair question and i refuse to pick one or even 5!

song stuck in my head: sambassim by dj patife

other blogs: @viviicho <-art blog @just-acre-things <-a stupid blog i made for the place i used to work that the owner does not know about

following: 700

followers: 1769

do i get asks: sometimes, but never when i ask for them!

amount of sleep i get: enough to be dizzy all day

lucky numbers: 420, 3

what i’m wearing: my favorite black jeans with flowers embroidered on them, acre tshirt, thin socks that look like theyre knitted but actually arent

dream job: ranch hand or dj or something

dream trip: right now i want to go out west and see the grand canyon and stuff

favourite food: i dont really have one but im craving fried yuca right now

instruments: faint memory of piano, a little bass guitar (meaning i tried learning and it was too hard so i just turn up the distortion and shred the fuck out of it), and GarageBand

languages: english and spanglish and some swedish curse words

favourite songs: red house by jimi hendrix, seraphim by princess nokia, coming home by kali uchis, breathe (in the air) by pink floyd, i luv i jah by bad brains, war pigs by black sabbath, sewnetuwa by hailu mergia, crimson and clover by joan jett, frontline by kelela, arepa 3000 by los amigos invisibles, locket by crumb, music selector is the soul reflector by deee-lite, viet nam by minutemen, tem que valer by kaleidoscopio, lonely by d’cruze...I could go on!! follow me on spotify at viviana_smith

random fact: im trying to read the communist manifesto but i cant focus

aesthetic: film grain, sharpened pictures, cool highlights with warm shadows, ancient things, earth tones, muted/neutral colors (sometimes with a pop of color), ethereal women, women with guitars or turntables, weird fashion, rave posters, latex, button up shirts, shaved hair or braids, grazing animals, completely white or black eyes and glowing eyes

i dont know.. if any follower wants to do it please do and say i tagged you!

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alippy711 · 6 years

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Falling Away With You-Ch.12

Chapter Twelve: Twins Night Out

“I can’t remember the last time we went to dinner just us”

I peered over my menu at Matt as he stared off, presumably trying to remember how long it had actually been.

“Honestly, I think it was before the season started. We are way over due for this” He smiled and nodded as the waitress came over dropping off our drinks.

It was a rare Friday night where both Matt and I were free and we jumped on the opportunity to head into the city for dinner and see what trouble we could get into. The two of us are as much a force on our own as we are with a group of friends.

“I feel like we haven’t talked all week, how are things with Evan?” I placed my menu on the table taking a long sip from my drink preparing to catch Matt up.

“Things are really great. Last weekend I hung out with him and Jared then we went to dinner the other night. I don’t know everything is just so...” I paused trying to think of the right word, “Easy with Evan”

“And they aren’t easy with pasta?”

“Some aspects are, we get along so easily and our personalities mesh really well, but what I worry about with David I don’t have to deal with when it comes to Evan” I shrugged hoping I was making some sense with my rambling.

“What do you worry about?”

“For starters Evan isn’t in the NHL which means our schedules are easier to work around and I can see him whenever. He also doesn’t leave the country for 3-4 months out of the year and I don’t have to worry about other girls.”

“Yeah but you sort of put yourself in that situation” His bluntness took me by surprise.

“I realize that. Its more the fact that Evan isn’t seeing any other girls because he wants a relationship.”I couldn’t be mad at his comment, it was true and Matt’s probably the only person who can get away with it.

“Do you want a relationship with Evan?” Matt’s eyes searched mine as he asked the million-dollar question.

“That’s what I need to figure out. We both know Evan is an amazing guy and I really like him. I love spending time with him, he’s everything im looking for…” My voice trailed off and I had to turn away from Matt’s piercing glance.

“But…”

“But no matter what David is always on my mind. I can’t shake him despite how hard I try. I haven’t seen him in a week and I feel like a part of me is missing.”

I picked up my drink, downing the contents in the glass as I pushed out a frustrated sigh annoyed at how much of an effect David had on me even when I wasn’t with him.

“Have you really been trying though?” He asked tilting his head to the side with a glare. I opened my mouth to speak but thought twice, knowing Matt would see through my lie.

“If you feel that way doesn’t it change things with Evan?”

“Nope. My feelings toward David don’t change his no relationship stance.”

“Basically you’re saying if David wanted a relationship there would be no question who you would pick.” It wasn’t a question but a statement and knew there was no reason to argue it.

“Unfortunately that isn’t the situation. I like Evan and want to see where it could go, but I can’t quit David, I need him to do something fucked up forcing me to cut him off” I pushed out an ironic laugh, knowing how messed up that sounded.

“You realize you’re essentially admitting to not having the ability to tell David no, right?”

“Completely aware. Im too far gone to pull away from him on my own. He’s my Achilles heel” He let out a low whistle understanding the gravity of my feelings for David.

Matt knew I was admitting to loving him without saying the words, he knew me. He looked between our empty glasses then flagged down our waitress as she walked away from another table.

“Could we get another round, please? Oh and two kamikaze shots”

“Of course, I’ll be right back with those, and your food should be up in a minute” My eyes were wide when he turned back to me and I noticed the glint in his eyes which could only mean trouble.

“Don’t give me that look, you need this”

I stumbled into the bone chilling winter air thankful for the reprieve from the stifling bar as my body buzzed from the alcohol. I was mid step when Matt’s hand came down hard on my shoulder yanking me back onto the sidewalk.

“Jesus Ash, pay attention you’re gonna get run over!” He yelled as a car zoomed by us.

“They should know to stop for me” I could hear my drunk voice and winced, it was definitely time to leave.

“Here, you need this slice more than me” I thanked him graciously taking the slice of Regina’s Pizza from him and downing it faster than my first slice. I watched him type furiously away on his phone and I looked down at my phone with a sudden urge to text David, another sign I was drunk.

“Ok the uber has been ordered” Matt smiled swaying slightly and I was thankful that he was as drunk as me, though he was probably a 7 to my current 9 on a 10 scale.

“Actually, can you order me a separate one?” The words came off my tongue before the thought was fully formed in my mind. His brow went up in question as his eyes narrowed to slits trying to figure me out.

“I wanna go crash with our little sis. She’s out at some BU party and I told her I would come by if we didn’t leave too late.” He continued to eye me suspiciously and I knew I needed to sell this.

“I haven’t seen Addie all week and if im going to be successful at distancing myself from David then there’s no one better to help with that than you two” I mentally patted myself on the back, I may have been drunk but that seemed pretty legit to me.

He huffed out a breath and pulled up his uber app. “Fine, but only because I know you haven’t been texting him tonight, because I’ve watched you like a hawk.” I flashed my best angelic smile and pushed down the voice in my head telling me this was a horrible idea. It had been a good three hours since Matt and I decided my best plan of action would be to limit my time alone with David, yet here I was…

I couldn’t help but think how inevitable this scenario was as I fumbled with his key. Anytime I made logical plans while drinking the opposite was more likely to occur. I also had a feeling Matt knew what I was up to, I mean he knew me better than anyone else, but I was currently too drunk to care. It had been eight days since I last saw David which meant logic was out the door. I walked into the mostly dark and quiet house, granted it was almost 1 in the morning with the only light on the first floor coming from the living room where I began my search.

“Pasta, where are you?”

My words rang out loud against the stillness as I walked past the stairway down the hall that led to the kitchen and living room. No answer. I walked further into the kitchen turning towards the living room when my eyes fell on the empty bottle of wine and two glasses on the coffee table. My heart began to race and I shook my head trying to rid my mind of every horrible thought currently flooding my brain. Jakub was still in town im sure the two of them had some wine, no need to go crazy. Unfortunately, the closer I came to the table the more I realized the over reaction was warranted because unless Jakub started wearing red lipstick I had just walked into my worst nightmare.

My eyes scanned the room and I spotted a woman’s winter coat hanging across one of the kitchen chairs. I immediately felt dizzy and grabbed hold of the couch as a wave of nausea washed over me. I took a few deep breaths trying to calm the sickness in my stomach, butI was failing. I turned, and as quietly and quickly as possible hustled back towards the front door but that’s when I heard it. My eyes drifted up the staircase as soft moans trickled down from above and there was nothing that could hold back the sickness now.

The tears were spilling over my cheeks in seconds while the nausea grew stronger forcing me to bolt towards the bathroom. I made it to the toilet just in time to release everything I had consumed that day as the pit in my stomach continued to grow while my heart broke. I had a million thoughts bouncing around in my head but the overwhelming need to get the fuck out of his house was the most prominent. I cleaned myself up, splashing water on my face and in my mouth before heading out of the bathroom.

I reached in my purse for my phone but found my keys first and stared at David’s key hanging off one of the rings. In my current drunken emotional state, I made the split-second decision to unhook the key from its place, walk back into the kitchen and toss it onto the counter before booking it towards the front door. I was steps away from freedom when a flood of light entered from the hallway where the guest room was.

“David?”

I heard Jakub’s voice call out as I swung open the door hoping it would block his view and hustled down the hallway of the building, not wanting him to see me. I went past the elevator and straight for the stairs in case Jakub followed me out. I leaned against the cement wall needing a minute to compose myself. My entire body was shaking, my heart racing and the tears were still falling, I was certain I looked like an absolute train wreck. It felt like my heart was shattering into a million little pieces as what just happened played on a loop in my mind. I pulled out my phone and dialed Addie’s number, knowing I couldn’t go home since I was technicallyat her place anyway.

“Hey Ash, what’s up?” Addie spoke

“Ad I need you to come get me” My voice broke between fits of crying.

“What’s wrong? Are you ok? Where are you? Aren’t you with Matt?” I could hear the panic in her voice as a million questions spilled from her mouth.

“Im at David’s. Pleasedon’t ask, just come get me.” I pleaded trying to contain my crying. She let out a heavy sigh and I heard her rummaging around before she spoke.

“Leaving now be there in 10.”

“Th-thank you” I stuttered hanging up the phone. I slowly made my way down to the lobby of the building needing the time to compose myself knowing I would have to face the concierge when I left the building. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and answered it without looking at the ID.

“Im here”

“Walking out in two seconds” I hung up the phone and pushed open the stairwell door revealing the brightly lit lobby, the noise gaining the attention of the man behind the desk. He smiled but it quickly faded as he caught a glimpse of my clearly rough state and opened his mouth to speak but I beat him to it.

“Have a good night” I said hustling past him towards the front doors fixated on Addie’s car. I could feel her eyes on me the second I sat down but I couldn’t look at her yet.

“Just give me a minute”

I begged trying to will the tears in my eyes to stop falling as I already had a massive headache from my previous crying bouts. I saw her nod her as she put the car in drive and headed back towards the other side of the city.

I picked at my manicure while she watched me from her desk chair while I explained the disaster once I left Matt.

“Do you think Jakub saw you?”

I shrugged, “Dunno, he definitely saw someone, but I don’t think he knew it was me, ya know?” She nodded giving me that look that told me she was trying to think of a nice way to say something.

“Just spit it out Ad’s”

She sighed, opened her mouth to speak but closed it and got up from her spot to come join me on the bed. She slapped lightly at my hands making me stop picking at my nails before finally speaking.

“I just don’t get why you went over there, things are going so well with Evan and you’ve cut back on spending time with David. So why?” She pleaded with me trying to figure out what I had been questioning ever since I told the uber driver to go to his place instead of hers.

“I don’t know, I was drunk and the first person to pop in my head was him, not Evan.” I sighed knowing that was the simple truth. My heart wanted David but my head wanted Evan. I wasn’t about to get into the same conversation with her that I had with Matt only hours before.

“I feel like-” She was cut off as my phone began to vibrate on the bedside table I reached over only to see David’s name flash across the screen.

“Fuck, the key” Realization flashing across my face. I looked back down at the phone hitting the side button muting the call and refocused my attention to Addie who was looking at me confused.

“I fucking took his key and left it on the kitchen counter before I left. He clearly just saw it.” I groanedlayingmy head in my hands.

“That was a dumb fucking decision, he’s not going to stop calling”

Her words were barely off her tongue when my phone started going off again. I held it up for her and she shot me a told-ya-so look as I released a frustrated groan. I muted the ringer again and tossed it on the floor.

“Ash..” She dragged out my name and I broke eye contact with her looking down at the blanket I was wrapped in.

“I know; I need to figure my shit out. Everything’s a fucking mess. But im done dealing with it tonight, im going to sleep.” She dropped it after that, knowing I had hit my limit for the day.

#david pastrnak #david pastrnak fic #david pastrnak imagine #hockey imagine #hockey fic #nhl imagine #nhl fic #falling away with you fic #nhl rpf

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