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hotchley · 3 years

Text

balls fair in love and war

So... this is the fic inspired by the AU in this post. Umm... it's a shambles, I low-key hate parts of it, the ending is rushed, but we're going with it before my laptop dies </3

Ignore any and all medical inaccuracies. I did a bit of research, but a lot of it confused me, so... this is not an accurate representation of a concussion. Like seriously. Also ignore any ethical issues, they're just... it's fine. As usual no proofreading. Umm.... don't ask where Rossi is. I don't know.

Taglist (I guess? I don't actually have one, it's just for this lol): @eldrai @willlemonheadsupremacy @shmaptainhotchnersmain @sarcvstiel @unionjackpillow @katytheinspiredworkaholic (you said you would read it so... is that okay?)

A very big and grateful thank you to @aaron-hotchner187 for giving me a title!! And to everyone else that gave suggestions, you are also much loved <3

Also, the way Hotch acts as a teacher is inspired by the way I think @ellyhotchner will be when they become a teacher <3 and everyone go and tell @whump-town thank you because she: told me about penlights, gave me the easy tiger line and is just overall a good person.

Trigger Warnings: concussions, fear of brain hemorrhages, hospitals, self-blame

read on ao3!

Like most things that went wrong in Aaron Hotchner’s life, his current predicament could be blamed on Emily Prentiss. He would not hear otherwise. And he didn’t think he should be forced to hear otherwise, given he was the one sitting on a hospital bed in a thin gown that did nothing to keep him warm, whilst she got to sit outside with a cup of coffee.

She had, admittedly, looked absolutely horrified when the accident occured, and had spent the whole journey to the hospital apologising again and again. He’s pretty sure she offered up her first-born child to him at some point as a form of penance. As well as her apartment. And he definitely remembers hearing something about grading his papers for him.

So whilst he may not want to be anywhere near her offspring- especially if they’re like her- and whilst he may definitely not want her apartment- he doesn’t care what she says, it is haunted- he will be taking her up on that last offer. Did he feel suitably appeased by her squirming the whole time, and by the fact that she was the one that had to explain to the principal why there were two classes screaming, crying and a teacher on the floor?

Yes, but there was no harm in milking it.

If he’s being completely honest, he felt like he was taking advantage of a hospital bed. He was sure he was fine. Yes, it hurts to move his head and he feels dizzy, and he probably has all the symptoms of a minor concussion, but he just really doesn’t want to be in the hospital.

Besides, he needs to make sure the kids aren't traumatised. It can’t have been easy for them, watching him just fall to the ground and hit his head hard enough for there to be blood. Emily could be traumatised, he didn’t care. But their students? Absolutely not.

He sighs. He wants to hand in his resignation now. Going back is going to be so embarrassing.

“I don’t think you understand. He is my best friend, and if he doesn’t get this blanket, he will- Spencer, what will he do if he doesn’t get this blanket?” A voice says from outside.

Aaron closes his eyes. He wants the ground to swallow him up. Forget returning to school, the next few minutes of his life are going to be even more embarrassing than the time Emily tricked him into being part of the Christmas pantomime. Haley hadn’t been offended, thank goodness, but still. It took him three months to be able to meet her eyes.

“He’ll- he’ll- I can’t even say it, it’s just so upsetting,” Spencer lies.

“Ma’am, sir, if you would let me speak for two seconds. Miss Prentiss said that some of her colleagues would be coming with Mr Hotchner’s things. All I am asking for is proof of identity,” the floor receptionist says.

The apologies immediately start to pour from the mouth of Penelope Garcia, whilst Spencer Reid just takes out both their driver's licences. The receptionist clearly approves, because before Aaron knows what’s happening, he’s being embraced by someone who smells like roses, and his favourite blanket is being draped over him.

“Oh my goodness, you don’t know how grateful I am that you’re alive,” Penelope says.

Aaron gives her a slight smile. Penelope is one of his favourite people, despite all their differences. And he likes to think he’s one of her favourites. He wouldn’t be thinking wrong.

“Penelope, I’m fine. Seriously. This is just a precaution. I promise it isn’t that bad,” he says, even though the light is starting to hurt his eyes.

“Isn’t that bad? I saw you and Emily taking your classes outside, which was weird to begin with because you both have classes that don’t require being outside, what were you doing? And then, I’m watching because the class can be trusted to sketch without my guidance and I’m curious. But then I turn my back for three seconds to help someone, and everyone is screaming, and you’re on the floor, and there’s blood everywhere and- it was scary!” she says.

“I’m so sorry,” Aaron says, for lack of anything else to say.

“I don’t want you to be sorry! I want you to stop getting hurt!” Penelope exclaims, whacking him in the shoulder.

“I don’t want you to be sorry either. It was hilarious to watch, my students were in hysterics,” Spencer adds. Penelope glares.

Aaron isn’t surprised. Him and Spencer get on- they even have shared interests- but they also have some of the same classes. And as a result of the different subjects and ways they teach, it seems to them that it is impossible for their students to like them both.

“So, not that I don’t appreciate it, but why are you here?” He asks.

Spencer and Penelope glance at each other, and Hotch feels like he’s dealing with two students that have tried to set up two of his friends.

“Garcia. Reid,” he says. In the same tone he uses when dealing with two students that have tried to set up two of his friends.

“We thought that if we came, JJ wouldn’t, but uhh-” Spencer starts.

JJ bursts into the room before he can finish. “”Hotch! What happened? I mean, I’ve heard what happened because Strauss came and told me the basics, but still. Why were the two of you in the playground? Are you okay? Let me see that bump on your head. I also brought your lunch in case you were peckish.”

“Well basically-”

“Why does Emily look like she’s about to start crying?” Haley asks, entering.

Everyone but JJ turns and stares at her with a slight look of horror. Aaron slides down the bed slightly, hoping the blanket can cover the furious blush that he just knows stains his cheeks. Him and Haley went on a date once, after he asked her in a moment of impulsivity. It was the worst thing he’d ever done, for both of them.

“Oh come on guys, we’re professionals. JJ asked me to come because apparently, Aaron listens to me? I said he’s just too afraid of me to disobey. Which, I meant as a joke, but you do know that I don’t hate you right? Sure, the date was a disaster, but you do know we can still be friends?”

“I thought you didn’t want anything to do with me,” he confesses.

“That’s why I brought her with me. To prove you wrong,” JJ says. “But yes, why is Emily so upset?”

“Because I almost killed my best friend and traumatised our students and I’ve ruined his life and our careers and he can get me fired and press charges, but all I wanted to do was make him laugh, and this is the first place where I’ve felt appreciated, and I’m going to lose it all,” Emily sobs from outside.

“Can you bring her in?” He asks Penelope.

She obliges, and Hotch pats the area next to him. Emily sits beside him, wiping her eyes on the corner of the extra blanket they brought.

“You didn’t almost kill me, it’s a mild concussion at most. Our students have seen worse, and they will be fine. My life is not ruined because you will be doing my grading. I’m not going to get you fired or press charges, and you’re not about to lose any of this. Okay?”

“You always know what to say,” she says.

He ruffles her hair.

“Love you. Platonically,” he tells her.

She gives him a bright smile, and he can feel himself smiling back, less embarrassed about everything.

And then she starts laughing hysterically, and deliberately shoves him, causing him to almost fall out of the bed, only stopped by Haley and Dave each grabbing one of his arms and pushing him back up. Of course, Emily just looks at him like she hasn’t done anything wrong.

“I cannot believe you fell for that. As if I would ever be that upset. Honestly. Haley, maybe I should replace you as drama teacher!”

Haley raises an eyebrow. “Ah yes, because the last time you got others involved in theatre, it ended so well.”

Emily has nothing to say.

Aaron does. He turns and swears in French.

“Naughty boy. Don’t let anyone else hear you. Especially not my class, I told them what that meant after you said it when I stole your stapler and then told you I’d given it to Miss Brooks.”

He pales.

“Speaking of your classes, how did this happen?” Haley asks, clearly sensing the need for a change in topic.

Emily looks at Aaron.

“It was your fault!” he says.

“Well it was your idea!” she counters.

He sighs. “So what happened was…”

Hotch and Emily’s classrooms are next to each other. To Hotch, this is both a blessing and a curse. It means he could keep an eye on her. It also means he had to keep an eye on her. See, Emily isn't irresponsible, and she would never actually endanger her students, but sometimes, she leans towards danger.

How, when she teaches modern languages, is beyond Hotch, but regardless. Strauss had actually hired Emily, not just for her abilities, but because she believed someone needed to keep an eye on Hotch. How the times have changed.

Hotch is on break duty, and he can't see anyone from his class. Which is weird. He tries to keep their lives as stress-free as possible, and he was always willing to help anyone that needs it, but certain assessments could not be avoided. But still, he expects to see at least one of them outside, if only to get a few minutes of fresh air.

Emily smiles at him sympathetically before she walks into her classroom. It is like someone had thrown a bucket of cold water over him. Sympathy from Emily isn't comforting. Not when it was aimed at him. If anything, it just makes him more scared. The last time she had looked at him like that, he had explained how his date with Haley had gone from one disaster to another.

And then she laughed.

So he pushes the door open, stepping back in case something fell on him. It wouldn't have been the first time. But nothing does. So he steps into his classroom, expecting to see his eleventh grade literature class doing something suspicious.

They aren't, and suddenly he understands exactly why Emily had looked at him like that.

Because his class has never looked so upset or defeated. And his heart breaks for all of them. It has been a while since he was fifteen, but he wouldn't ever forget the feeling of helplessness that seemed to define his existence. Nor would he forget how everything felt like too much and not enough.

"What happened?" He asks them gently.

Violet, a quiet girl that always tells him what Miss Prentiss had said about him, burst into tears. One of her friends patted her back, but it's clear they didn't quite know what they were doing. Neither does Hotch, but goddammit, these are his kids. Nobody is going to hurt them.

"Hey, it's okay. Do you want to go somewhere else?" He asks her.

She shakes her head. "I just- I want all of this to be over, but then I don't because it means going to college and leaving here and having to grow up, but I just- I have no fucking idea what I'm doing and it's all too much."

He winces at the use of swear words, because he is still a teacher, but that also means he feels a sense of pride that she's able to voice what it is. Because now, he may not be able to fix the situation, but he can help.

"I know. That's okay. That's normal. And you'll work it out. You know, I almost became a lawyer."

She looks up, her eyes red, but starting to sparkle again. "A lawyer."

"Yep, I almost also applied to the FBI Academy. It was actually Miss Prentiss that talked me out of that one. Well, it wasn't really talking but the true story is a little too… inappropriate for school."

"I can't imagine you doing either of those. You'd get bored as a lawyer, and you would never smile as an FBI agent," Clarissa says.

Hotch blinks.

She shrugs like it's the most obvious thing in the world. And then she offers him a piece of candyfloss, which he rejects.

He checks his lesson plan. And then his planner. And then the calendar he keeps on his table. Emily always makes fun of him for being so organised, but Spencer admires it, and that makes him feel cool, so he focuses on that instead.

"I have a compromise. We don't need to do a lesson today, we have more than enough time to cover everything because we're already ahead. I let you do whatever you want for the remainder of the lesson- whether that's colouring or crying or dancing. But you have to do it outside. I didn't see any of you at break."

"Really?" Violet asks.

He nods. "Of course."

Everyone cheers, and grabs their bags, clearly ready to not use their brains for a bit. Aaron gives them the most warm smile he can manage, but he can't help the small surge of guilt that accompanies his lack of realisation.

As his class exits, happily chattering away to each other, Emily pokes her head out the door.

"Mr Hotch, what are you doing, and can I join?"

Immediately, all eyes are on him.

"Please?" Violet asks.

Clarissa pulls out the puppy eyes.

Thomas falls to his knees.

"Oh my god, yes fine, okay, just- everyone be quiet before Strauss finds out and shouts at me," he says.

Emily runs back inside, and soon, they're all just milling about and having fun on the playground. It's nice, both for the students, and the teachers, to have a bit of a break from the world, and to spend a few moments away from it all. Some of them are running around, playing a game of tag, some of them are simply sitting around, and a few are colouring.

"Do you still like playing catch?" Emily asks him.

"What?"

"Catch. Remember, you used to play it with Sean all the time when we were in college."

"I mean yeah, I would probably get involved, but I'm not quite sure-"

"Think fast!" She shouts, and she lobs a netball at him.

The last thing he thinks, moments before his head meets the ground with a large amount of force- enough for there to be a small amount of blood- is: how is it always her? Every single time he gets into a situation, it's her that causes it. That has to be statistically impossible. Maybe he should ask Spencer…

"So yeah! And now I'm here!" He shoves Emily, who has the audacity to look offended.

Penelope kisses his forehead. Haley laughs a little, but Reid just blinks like he can't quite believe how stupid his co-workers are.

"Well. From what I've heard, it was a pretty good shot," JJ comments.

Haley turns to her. "From everything we've just been told, that's what you choose to pick out?"

"I'm a gym teacher, can you really blame me?"

Emily mutters something.

"You were what?" Garcia asks.

"I was aiming for his leg," she repeats.

"Emily. I know you teach languages, not biology, but look at me. Head," Hotch says, pointing at the bump he's not going to cover up, "Leg." He points at his ankle.

"It's always lovely when people know their anatomy. Saves me a lot of time," a new voice says.

Hotch turns in the direction of it, ready to make a snarky comment, but whatever words he had thought of die on his lips as he suddenly feels like he's been transported into a medical drama full of unrealistically attractive protagonists.

Because the doctor who has just walked in is the most handsome man he has ever seen. His smile is easy and genuine, and his eyes seem to twinkle with mischief. And his arms, oh god his arms seem like the safest place to exist. Aaron can't help but wonder what it would be like to have those arms wrapped around him-

His cheeks warm. No.

"Hi, I'm Dr Morgan. But you can all call me Derek. I'm here for Aaron Hotchner. Who I am going to assume, is you," he says, looking straight at Hotch.

"I- yes. How did you know?"

Dr Morgan- Derek- somehow smiles even more. "Well, even though there are far too many people in here- did all of you somehow miss the two people at one time sign- you are the only one in a hospital bed wearing a hospital gown, so. I'm no profiler, but it was pretty easy."

If it's even possible, his cheeks flush more. But one word sticks out to him. "Wait, profiler?"

"You got me. Crime procedurals are my guilty pleasure. I always said that if I joined the FBI, I would become a profiler. Obviously, I went down a very different route."

"Obviously. Wait, too many people? Oh god, I'm so, so sorry, if you need them to leave, they can. In fact, I also feel a lot better, so if you would like me to also go, I really, it's no trouble."

Because he is an idiot- there really is no other justification for this- he tries to stand up. And he does. He also gets a few steps in before the world starts spinning and he almost loses his balance. Derek somehow moves fast enough to guide him back to the bed. Aaron tries and fails to ignore how warm he is.

"Thanks," he whispers, slightly breathless. And not just from almost hurting himself again.

"It's not a problem Aaron. Both things. Your friends can stay, we're just doing some simple checks," Derek says.

"Oh everyone calls him Hotch," Penelope says.

"Aaron is fine. Really." Because he likes Derek calling him Aaron. He wants Derek to call him Aaron.

And then he meets Emily's eyes and he realises his mistake. There's a common denominator that exists with everyone that he tells to call him Aaron, and he knows that she knows what it is. He's fucked.

"Okay then. Well, can you explain to me what happened?"

Aaron is mesmerised by Derek's eyes. So mesmerised that he forgets to answer. "Sorry, what?"

There's a flash of concern, replaced by a smile. "Can you tell me how you ended up here?"

"Oh yes. So, I'm a teacher- so is everyone here. And I- I was outside, with my- my students when Emily- that one there- she, look, it's a really mild concussion, can I just be discharged? I'm sure my students are very, uhh, very scared," he stutters. Why can he never function when he likes someone? It's mortifying.

"I'm sure it is, but you can't blame me for doing my job. I'm going to take your heart rate now, okay? The stethoscope will be cold, but it'll warm up eventually," Derek says.

Aaron nods, and barely flinches when it touches him. If anything, he's more concerned by how close Derek seems to be. Not in a malicious way, but he's always had this deeply irrational fear that if someone got too close to him, they'd be able to read his thoughts. Which would mean Derek can hear both the fact that he has a crush and that he has this fear.

Derek pulls away, and Aaron exhales.

"Your heart rate is unusually fast. Normally that wouldn't be too concerning, because we expect that when patients seem anxious, but you've seemed pretty calm, up till this moment," Derek says, noting how Aaron tenses.

"Is he going to be okay?" Penelope asks.

Derek turns to her. "Of course he is. He's in good hands."

Aaron needs to get his mind out the gutter before his cheeks explode. Or before Emily opens her mouth.

"Aaron, I know you think the concussion is mild, but this is still a requirement. I'm going to turn on this penlight, and I'm going to ask you to follow it with your eyes okay? Follow the light," Derek explains.

He nods, and Derek turns the penlight on. Aaron flinches at the brightness of it, then tenses in slight fear that his lovely doctor is going to be annoyed at him or call him difficult, or sigh and say he needs to stop acting like a child. It wouldn't be the first time,

But Derek doesn't do any of those things. He does something very different.

He places his hand on Aaron's thigh. "Easy tiger. I won't hurt you," he says.

Aaron melts. His eyes drop down to where Derek's hand is warming his skin. He thinks Derek says his name, but he's too busy having a crush to hear him. And then suddenly, his thigh is cold, but Derek is touching his shoulder and he should be shying away from the light being shone in his eyes. But he isn't because he's too busy looking at Derek and his beautiful eyes to even pay attention.

Rather late, he remembers that there is a reason for Derek to be looking at him the way he is, and he tries to follow the light. But the headache he's had since he came around is only getting worse, and the light isn't helping.

Derek isn't smiling anymore.

"Aaron. Be very honest with me. You've displayed difficulty with coordination, memory and speech. If I asked you whether or not you felt sick or nauseous, what would your answer be?"

Normally, he would just under exaggerate, but Derek seems to genuinely care. So he chooses to be honest.

"Yes?"

Derek's eyes widen. "Aaron, I don't want to alarm you, but I like to keep my patients informed. You're going to have a CT scan done immediately, and there's a chance you may be rushed into emergency surgery."

Everyone, including Emily, starts to panic, but Derek leaves the room to grab a nurse to help, and to tell someone else to make sure there's a clear room. Aaron isn't completely sure what's happening, but his head is killing him, so he lays down again. It only helps a small amount.

For Aaron, the CT scan isn't too bad. If he knew the reason it was being done, and that it wasn't a routine procedure, he would probably have spent the whole time panicking. But he doesn't, and so he sits there- well lies there- with a slight smile on his face. The migraine he's had has been getting worse, so keeping his eyes closed for such an extended period of time is actually quite enjoyable.

It is far less enjoyable for everyone that is upstairs, waiting to find out whether or not their friend has a brain hemorrhage. That's what Derek told them after Aaron was carted away, still seeming very out of it. They needed to test him for a brain bleed. And if he had one, then it would just be a case of waiting to see whether they could treat him. And even if they could treat him, it wasn't guaranteed that he would get back to normal.

Emily, in spite of all of her teasing comments, isn't coping. Because it's still early, the floor is relatively quiet, and Derek is technically on his lunch break, so he's sitting with them in an attempt to provide them with some sort of comfort. He's not sure where this emotional attachment to these random people has come from, but it's formed itself and now he's determined to provide some comfort.

"I really was aiming for his leg," Emily whispers.

"Hmm?" Derek asks, not quite following.

"When I threw the ball, I really was aiming for his leg. He had lost consciousness by this point, but I started crying when he hit the ground. He forgave me. He told me he loved me, platonically that is, and I laughed at him. He's going to die, and he isn't going to know how much he meant to me."

"He's not going to die. He may not even have a brain bleed. But if he does, we're going to save him, and you're going to be able to spend the rest of your life telling him how much he means to you. I promise," Derek says.

Even though there are tears in her eyes, Emily turns to him and smiles. "You're a good man, Dr Morgan."

"That's all I've ever wanted, Miss Prentiss. So thank you. It means a lot to me." And it does. He replays the moment as he goes over to Spencer and Penelope, who he feels a strange sense of protection over. Like he needs to protect them from everything, which is weird, because once Aaron is discharged, he'll probably never see them again.

That shouldn't make him sad, but it does.

"Mr Hotchner's CT scan came back normal. There's no sign of a brain bleed," the nurse tells them, what feels like a lifetime later.

There's a collective sigh of relief, and when he's wheeled back in, looking tired but alive, Emily throws her arms around her best friend, who lets out a soft sound of surprise. Like he's not quite used to the fact that people love him. Derek smiles. His patient will be in good hands when he gets discharged.

"Wait, so what caused all of those problems?" Spencer asks.

The nurse shrugs. "It's probably as simple as: his concussion was more severe than we initially thought, but not as bad as we feared."

"Oh."

"And on that note, Aaron, we're keeping you overnight for observation. It's just to be safe. We can't be too careful. You gave everyone a very big scare when you got sent out," Derek says.

Aaron cannot, and will not, confess. Does he feel guilty? Yes. But he can live with the guilt. He cannot live with the all-encompassing shame that will come with explaining that actually, the reason he was stuttering and failing the penlight test was because of a silly little crush.

"Okay," he says, determined to be as compliant as possible.

"One- and only one- of you is welcome to stay with him, if you'd like," Derek adds.

Haley's eyes light up. "I'll do it! Jessica can bring me my things, and maybe you'll be able to look at me after we've spent another night together. Only this time, nobody's getting pneumonia. I hope so, at least. You're not cold are you?"

Aaron shakes his head. "But you really don't need to stay. I'll be fine on my own. Seriously."

"I know, but I want to. Believe it or not, I do actually enjoy your company."

He smiles.

"We should all be getting a move on. Jason and Erin will want updates, and I have lots of marking," JJ says. She kisses Hotch on the forehead before walking to the door, smiling at Derek for looking after her friend so well.

Spencer waves from where he's standing and Penelope showers him with affection. Emily is the only one that seems hesitant to leave.

"Can I stay till visiting hours end?" She asks.

"Do you feel like you can keep up with these two lovely ladies Aaron?" Derek asks.

Aaron has never enjoyed the sound of his name as much as he does when it comes from the doctor. "I- sure," he stutters, and he just knows his cheeks are a stupid colour. Emily frowns, as though she finds something suspicious.

Derek smiles. "Good man. I'll be back in a few hours to run the same tests as before. For now, take it easy."

Derek doesn't come back a few hours later, because he has other patients. It's a different doctor, and Aaron is both relieved and disappointed. Because on the one hand, he's not going to create another medical crisis, on the other, he wants to see Derek again.

Maybe he can get Emily to knock him out again…

"Your heart rate seems completely normal. And you followed the penlight exceptionally well, so I believe we have nothing to fear. Of course, you'll stay overnight, and we'll run these tests once more before you're discharged tomorrow, but I think we're out of the woods now," they say.

Emily gasps, and Aaron knows he's screwed. Luckily, both the doctor and Haley seem to not have heard, and she leaves with the doctor, so Aaron doesn't have to know right at that moment whether his suspicions are correct.

"Night Hotchner," Haley says a few minutes later.

Hotch is already asleep.

The entire team comes and collects him from the hospital.

Aaron is just grateful they're sending him home with a pack of all the things he now needs to do, because he spent the whole lecture admiring how handsome Derek looks with sun shining down on him that he didn't take any of it in. It's also Derek's signature on the discharge papers. He's reminded of high school, when he and his friends would make fake marriage certificates. Not that he's going to do that.

"Bye Aaron. I don't want to see you here any time soon, okay?" Derek teases.

"I won't make any promises," he replies, just relieved he does it without stuttering or blushing.

Derek smiles, and the twinkle in his eyes seems even more mischievous. "Miss Prentiss," he says, spotting Emily.

"Dr Morgan," she responds. She's smirking.

When Aaron asks her what was going on, she doesn't answer. Haley says it's probably linked to the emotions of the previous day, and she's usually good at reading these situations, so he doesn't push any further. Besides, he's too busy catching up with the meetings he missed, and the antics of his students, because a lot happened in the three days he was off, to give it much thought.

Two weeks pass, and the incident is almost completely forgotten.

But then he walks back into his classroom, having just finished a meeting, and he finds flowers on his desk. Tulips. His favourite. He immediately pulls the note out, and when he opens it, he almost wonders if he's concussed it.

Because he knows that signature. He's been staring at it for fourteen days. It's Derek's.

"Surprise. Aaron," a voice says for the doorway.

"How- what- I- what?"

Derek Morgan, still in scrubs and a white coat, smiles at him. "Want to pick a question I can actually answer?"

"How did you- what are you doing here? And why?"

"Well, you should thank Emily. After the other doctor took your heart rate, she came and told me her suspicion. Apparently, you always say you're Hotch. Even the students call you Mr Hotch. Which is strange, because I call you Aaron. And, you shouldn't have done the penlight flawlessly if you had a more severe concussion. So she thinks you have a crush. I didn't want to be unethical, so those flowers can simply mean: I hope you're coping. If you don't have a crush that is."

"What if I do?" Aaron asks, surprised at his own boldness.

"Then I would ask if I could kiss you before I take you out to dinner," Derek says, not missing a beat.

"And if I said yes?"

Derek takes three long strides, and he kisses Aaron like it's something he was made to do. Aaron melts against him, trying to memorise him as quickly as he can, before he realises he has all the time in the world to do that. Because Derek is going to take him out to dinner. Derek, who brought him flowers.

"That was- wow. Wait. You have a crush on me too!" Aaron exclaims with a grin.

"Of course I do," Derek says.

That stuns Aaron back into silence. "Wow," he whispers to himself.

Derek hugs him, and being in his arms is everything- no more- than Aaron imagined it to be. "I'm glad you're okay," he says.

"I'm glad you don't hate me," Aaron says, because he really doesn't know what else to say.

Derek laughs, and Aaron can't wait to find all the ways he can make that happen.

"We should say thank you to Emily at some point. If she didn't know you as well as she does, she wouldn't have realised you had a crush. And if she wasn't so terrifying when she wants something good for her friends, I wouldn't have sent the flowers."

"Can we say thank you later? I want to stay like this for a few moments," Aaron whispers, snuggling closer to his new boyfriend.

"Of course we can," Derek says, kissing his forehead.

When they eventually make it to Derek's car- Aaron can come back tomorrow and get his, it'll be fine, Aaron realises he has one more thing to say.

"Derek?"

"Yes, sweetness?"

Well. That makes him feel things he won't confess too, because he needs something to make him seem the slightest bit cool.

"I'm really sorry I made you think I had a brain hemorrhage."

Derek's laughter is so real that Aaron can't help but join in, and they end up not starting the car for five minutes because it would be irresponsible to drive in that state. And it's only when they're pulling out that they both realise something: Derek gets to see Aaron's family again, and Emily didn't need to hit him in the head again for him to get to see Derek again.

#criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #hotchgan #mortch #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #tw concussion #tw brain hemorrhages #tw hospitals #tw self blame

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phati-sari · 3 years

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IPKKND 10-year anniversary Instagram Live

You can watch it here or here. I kinda live-blogged it.

Lol at Abhaas struggling with the filters.

Oh no, Dalljiet dropped out! Oh, she’s back.

Is Barun wearing a white kurta on purpose?

(Edited 36 minutes into the video: I don’t think he would even remember the white kurta lol)

This is so chaotic. Sanaya’s trying to keep them all on track and failing miserably.

Abhaas: *mentions Balwant Kaur*

Barun: Main tere ko mukha maar doon?

Aww, that made me a little sad, that he can’t actually deny the journalists when they ask the same three inane questions over and over and over again. He still sang it though.

LOL Abhaas just straight-up acknowledging that the fans wouldn’t have tuned in without Barun and Akshay.

Abhaas: “Blame the gram, don’t blame the host.”

Barun: “Main toh chingum dhoond raha hoon yaar.” I laughed so hard I had to rewind it.

Ngaw, poor Akshay. I super respect the way he’s come out and gone on record about exactly how unhappy he was with how it all turned out.

I love how surprised Sanaya was!

Abhaas: *mentions that he met Dalljiet last*

Sanaya: Really?!?!

Dalljiet: Muhn maar raha tha mera husband kahin aur, muhn kala kar raha tha. Wahan shoot pehle hui thi! Ghar toh baad mein aaya na?

Barun: Haan phir dara hua tha main, helicopter mein kabhi baitha nahin tha! ... Pehla din seedha helicopter mein daal diya ... Main bahut pareshan, ki main toh middle-class Delhi ka aadmi hoon, mere ko helicopter mein bitha ke karenge kya?

Oh I remember this!! They hired a Toyota RAV4 Fortuna for Lucknow and then had Arnav in the other white cars with the badge covered as if no-one would notice. He’s right, they would’ve had him on a moped had the serial continued lol.

I’ve often made jokes about how the passenger-side seat-belt was probably broken given how much Khushi struggled with it -- nice to know the car was just a piece of crap.

Ahh, they’re talking about their entries. I do so very much love the way Arnav and Shyam were introduced.

I laughed very hard at how quickly Akshay said “Never!” to doing another show. I’m on that boat right there with him lol, may these people never act together again!

Nggaaawww. Barun saying Akshay’s exit scene was the first time the director was telling them not to cry, whereas at other times he was always told to cry more.

As a side note, I love that Aman and Lalit were named after the directors. It was a nice touch and I try to preserve it in my stories.

The razor story makes a come-back lol.

OH THEY’RE EXPLAINING THE MISSING SHOTS. I’ve waited ten years for someone to explain it!!!

Akshay’s favourite scene was the NYE one they had to do because Barun and Sanaya were on holidays. It’s kind of sad -- he totally has a point because that is one of Aakash’s best sequences and he only had the chance to do it because both leads were away.

One of the things I like about IPKKND is that even the nonsensical scenes and sequences have a reasonably good in-canon explanation. Like, if the Bali-in-Delhi sequences came about because of cost-cutting and they were initially supposed to go somewhere (be still my beating heart, this is going to be an OS, I can feel it), the final result -- while still random -- doesn’t feel super awkward.

I too love the scene in the mandir with Arnav and his Di!!

Abhaas: Your whole show was mandir-wala scene!

Q: What would your characters be doing right now?

Q: If not for your character, which other character would you want to play on the show?

Barun: I would be busy running Amazon. A to Z. Big businessman. And maybe Arnav is having a conversation with someone to sell the Safari and buy a smaller car.

Akshay: My business in America tanked because nothing gets done without Arnav! Now he’s selling CDs.

Dalljiet: Shyam isn’t there, we kicked him out with a slap.

Abhaas: I’m still plotting against you with a scorpion.

Dalljiet: Well I’m cooler than all of you because you all have children.

Sanaya: You didn’t have a kid?

Dalljiet: No, and we kicked out the person I’d have kids with.

Akshay: I think Shaym got married to the scorpion.

Oh my goodness Abhaas still has Rani Sahiba saved on his phone, which is still programmed as Aman’s number.

Abhaas: Anyone but Shyam? I would be Aakash.

Akshay: Kya bol raha hai bhai?

Barun: I would’ve played Hari Prakash if they paid me per-day.

Q: What dialogue do you remember from your character?

Dalljiet: I would love to play Hello hi bye-bye!

Akshay: I would not want to play in Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon! (after like ten minutes of refusing to answer) ... Lakshmi!

Sanaya: I would want to play Mami-ji for sure!

I laughed so hard when Akshay slapped Abhaas through the screen that I cried.

Sanaya: Laad Governor!

Akshay: *dramatique* Bhai.

Okay, the rest just devolved into general chaos.

Dalljiet: *reads out chat* Akshay is hot!

Akshay: *Vogues*

That was fun to watch, gave me some much-needed laughs. Doesn’t beat the LOTR reunion though.

#ipkknd #iss pyaar ko kya naam doon #10 years of ipkknd #ipkknd cast

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leaveharmony · 3 years

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would love to know about some of kennys other offenses. please.

Boy howdy nonners, how long have ya got lol

Alright so I was never...A Fan, to begin with. I tolerated him even if I found him irritating in a lot of ways.

The real Problems I had w/ him started at the first press conference after he won the Heavyweight title; that night jericho won the Intercontinental and (fucking) elgin won the NEVER; kenny basically outright said that three (white) guys from Canada just "wanted it more" than the domestic roster. That he "never sees" the Japanese wrestlers at the gym, that they're "complacent" and that's why they were outshone. Everybody lost their minds. A good friend was trying to gently tell him "Bro you're better than this, you really should have chosen your words more carefully here because that could really, super be interpreted as racist" And he directly responded RE "Please don't look for any 'hidden' racist meaning..." and basically doubled down, and then stood back & watched all his followers bully the shit out of my friend for like a week solid, for the crime of daring to question his choice of words. She didn't even call HIM a racist, just suggested he could maybe be more mindful when talking directly to western fans bc there's always been a miles-long racist streak in wrestling in general and him talking that way when so many ppl accept what he says as gospel wasn't helping.

There was the bodyshaming...that wasn’t a one-time thing, either, but I digress.

There was the absolute debacle when Meltzer got involved w/ an article RE after kenny left he had "visa problems" ...you have to walk that back to the press conference between Tana and kenny before WK (iirc) wherein kenny claimed he'd gotten his citizenship and felt like he was now "real Japanese." Which was...kinda yikes in and of itself, but after all that shook out and he took his ball and went home it transpired that it was a flat-out lie, and he'd actually gotten like, a permanent residency. Now: that meant, so long as he had a company sponsoring him he enter and leave Japan as he pleased w/ that paperwork. Only he quit NJPW. So they were no longer sponsoring him, but he was still trying to enter the country w/ this visa/status he had absolutely no claim to anymore because he gave it up when he no longer had that position w/ their company. This turned into a whole ridiculous conspiracy theory RE NJPW was somehow pulling strings to "get him banned from the country for ten years." The ten years figure was...actually how long he'd have to wait before reapplying for the status he lost, as was explained to me by someone who actually had some experience in the area. How much of that nonsense actually came from kenny’s own mouth right to Meltzer's ears? Hard to say, and it MAY have been a miscommunication that got printed as fact, but all Himself would say was a dramatic "Someday I'll tell you all about how my year was SO MUCH WORSE than rumoured." All he had to do was say 'Guys no I just ran into some red tape, NJPW has nothing to do with it' but instead he had to fuel the gossip of a mysterious, malicious conspiracy against him and cast the mean, cruel company who...let him leave when he quit...as the relentless villain bullying him out of the country. This sounds like an exaggeration but he did, actually, have some stupid video based on Undertale (I think?) made in which there was a knockoff Lion’s Mark literally playing the villain. It was...extremely embarrassing tbh. And he may even believe it, who knows? He may actually believe he was pushed out because he was a ~foreigner~ they refused to take seriously; his ego is big enough that I’d not be surprised.

Sometimes istg he even gaslights himself; I remember when he said Shinsuke "hasn't done anything compelling" since leaving for wwe (as though Shinsuke books himself lol)...but then before aew formed, but after he left NJPW, he kept claiming that if he went to wwe he'd be able to put on a seven-minute clinic every show, with the scraps of screentime they throw him...that everybody would be talking about him and only him, that he’d ‘enjoy’ the creative restrictions...as though he didn’t like, walk out on their developmental years ago because of all those restrictions :/

Just last year he was still bitching that Shinsuke never dropped the Intercontinental directly TO him, instead vacating it for a tournament. Because Shinsuke was "one of their guys," because he always has to have a Special Connection to everyone...as though when this man was about to take a huge step and start a new life, what everybody should really have been thinking about was "Gosh but what about kenny though, shouldn't he have had the distinction of beating him directly for it?" And notably that’s all he’s said about Shinsuke since he left. Never brings him up when ppl ask who he’d like to see in aedubya, nothing like that...so I mean, so much for special connections or respect lol. Respect only goes one way for him.

There was certainly the time he booked a convicted sex offender! For one of his lil pet shows. And when ppl called him on it he immediately got defensive and took issue with their "tone" and how they were ~judging him~ without having full information, and if they wanted him to respond politely they should speak kindly and politely to him first (again you’d think I’m exaggerating but that is actually what he said, try being kind and polite). It took maybe a day of fighting people on twitter before he acted like a fucking adult about that one, even if his sullen "apology" still came off like it had an unspoken "...even though I didn't do anything wrong personally" tacked on the end.

There was his fucking...infuriating white saviour complex RE how with him Steering the Ship NJPW would be unstoppable. There was his ludicrous claim that "Tanahashi's never done anything for international fans"...conveniently omitting that if it weren't for Tana, there wouldn't have been a company left to hire his skank ass, let alone one for there to be international fans OF. There was his wink wink nudge nudge way of trying to play both sides; acting Respectful and like a Good Guy when he gave comments in Japanese and essentially going "SIKE!" in english so the neckbeards knew he didn’t really think he wasn’t the only thing worth watching. He made a point of saying during that feud that if they dared put Tana over him the company would be "going backwards," and then made a point of saying he "Can't work under Tanahashi" as he left - a last cheap parting shot to make sure everybody knew who to 'blame' for him tragically leaving.

He straight up said the whole native roster should "thank me for their paycheques" because of course kenneth omegaman is the only one anyone is paying to see, no one else could possibly be interesting enough to tune in for, only him.

I remember when he was hilariously claiming that LIJ would never catch on for the western audience and Naito would never be popular here lol.

He bitches, somehow, simultaneously about not having been made leader of the bullet club soon enough (having to step aside for aj), and that "before the first Okada match" he was making more money from prowrestlingtees than he was from his contract (as though making him leader of the most visible western faction and essentially giving him a license to print money in the process somehow wasn't enough).

Like two years after he left he is still! Taking every chance he can get! To shit on NJPW. He and the fucking bucks were still shit-talking Harold, ffs, years after they left.

....I feel like Marge when Reverand Lovejoy was asking her to list grievances about Homer. He probably does blow his nose on towels and put them back in the cupboard, too, but only in other people’s houses :P

Anyway that’s off the top of my head.

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artistic-writer · 4 years

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The Contract :: CS Omegaverse :: Ch 7

Title: The Contract Rating: E Summary: Emma had never wanted much in her life, despite being married to one of the richest men in the world. For ten years she has felt like a prisoner in her own marriage, denied the one thing she wants the most, but her husband cannot help but bargain her want like a cheap business deal. Enter Killian Jones, the Alpha her husband has hired to make sure she gets what she wants. And then some.

AO3 - Ko-Fi (100% of coffee’s bought go towards buying @adognamedkillian toys and treats!)

A/N: Chapter 7!!! It comes with some trigger warnings i’m afraid, because I am just that kind of writer *evil grin* TW: domestic abuse. I don’t know what else to call it without giving anything away, which i do not want to do. As always, if in doubt, message me. This chapter has the answers everyone has been waiting for, and some other good news! Ch 8 is already done!

Fantastic artwork by @kmomof4 so give her some love and beta’d by the lovely @hollyethecurious And as ever, thank you to all the ladies in Discord! Thanks ladies!

This is an Omegaverse fic featuring A/B/O dynamics. Whilst this varies from fandom to fandom, for the purposes of my fic, there will be no mpreg. Just so you know. There will however be knotting, breeding, heats and other delicious things that come along with A/B/O. If you do not know what A/B/O is, feel free to message me :) Many thanks to @hollyethecurious @shardminds @kmomof4 @darkcolinodonorgasm @resident-of-storybrooke and @ineffablecolors for letting me bounce my complicated ideas of you lol

If you wish to stay away from this fic, blacklist the A/B/O tag.

Taglist: I’ll be honest, i have lost my taglist for this fic, so if you want a tag, please message me here on on discord (Salem #5158/ [email protected]) and I’ll add you! I’ve tagged the following people i KNOW want to read this, but i don’t want to accidentally tag you if you do not like ABO.

@hollyethecurious @shardminds @kmomof4 @resident-of-storybrooke @darkcolinodonorgasm @thisonesatellite @xemmaloveskillianx @hookedonapirate @teamhook @winterbaby89 @carpedzem @courtorderedcake @profdanglaisstuff @itsfabianadocarmo @donteattheappleshook @ultraluckycatnd @jennjenn615

——————————————————————————————

A week was going to be far too long. It was only seven days but in the grand scheme of things, Emma worried that it might feel like forever without the Alpha she was now sure she was in love with. Of course, she hadn’t told him that. Like an idiot, once he had declared his feelings, she had pretended she was asleep and let him pull her harder into his embrace where she had spent the rest of the night. Morning had come and he was gone but she didn’t blame him. After all, she was well aware that Graham was having the apartment watched, making sure that neither of them broke the terms of his precious contract.

Maybe this was a blessing. Maybe they had been spending too much time together. As much as Emma wanted her bastard husband to be wrong, maybe he was right. For the next seven days she was to accompany Ruby to a very exclusive spa where they would get some much needed rest and relaxation, or so Graham had told her. In truth, he had been angry at how much time she was spending with Killian, his loyal henchmen having told on them and their extra meetings. She should have known. Graham was far too connected to not find out, and Emma had only agreed to go with Ruby because she was afraid of confirming the reality of his paranoia.

Emma did have feelings for Killian. They were more than she had ever felt before, powerful and robust and she was sure that not even seven days apart would change them. The time would be perfect for her to process her own feelings, and how to let Killian know that she felt the same. Emotions had ever been her strongest point, and to play along with his little game, Emma had told Graham that she would be glad to get away from all the men in her life, which also meant, however, that she had to be careful of what she told Ruby. Best friend or not, she was still a spy for Graham and she had no doubt that Ruby would sing like a songbird given half the opportunity.

All Emma had to do now was tell Killian.

It would crush him to see her gone. Emma knew what it meant for an Alpha to declare their love for another. Most of the time they never did until they were sure they had found that perfect someone, but she had never known a single Alpha to pair with a Beta as their mate. Ever. That was half of the confusion currently swirling around inside Emma’s head. She was a Beta, and a broken one at that, illness rife within her body, and she was damn sure she wasn’t worth the love of any Alpha, let alone one so perfect.

She paced up and down the apartment, stopping briefly to draw the curtains. The metal rings scraped across the metal rail, but the sound was quickly drowned out when a car sped passed outside. Emma pulled one curtain back a little in case it had been Killian, but the bright red tail lights at the end of the street dashed her hopes in a second. With a sigh, she shut the curtain again and resumed her steady pacing around the apartment.

She had never been a worrier before, but suddenly she felt herself apprehensive for Killian’s arrival. Years of mental control at the hands of a so-called husband would do that to anyone, but rationally Emma knew that whatever she had to say, Killian would be okay with. In a way, she kind of agreed with Graham, not because she thought they needed to be apart, but because they had been spending so much time together even she was starting to realise that she only smiled when she heard Killian’s voice. Graham was a lot of things, but he was not blind.

Emma only wanted to tell Killian one thing; that she felt the same way and she would be back with the same feelings in her heart.

Her attachment to Killian had become so much lately that she didn’t even recognize herself anymore. She had become someone else, someone liberated and where she had previously been quick to argue, she was now willing to accept whatever pleasure or punishment was dealt out to her. Killian had awakened that inside of her, and she was not ready to let it go. She knew Graham would never give her a divorce, but over the last few hours she had found herself trying to fabricate ways of getting rid of him for good.

A soft knock on the door woke her from her murderous daydream and she was up and racing towards the door before she had even looked in that direction. She knew it was Killian. She could smell him, even through the door, cedarwood and sea salt with a dash of darkness that only she had been privy to. She grabbed the door handle and pulled hard, the wooden panel jumping from the frame without a single sound. She gasped, because somewhere between drawing the curtains and plotting her husband’s death, it had rained, obvious by the fact that Killian now stood in her doorway dripping wet.

He was out of breath having raced from his car, but had been unable to avoid the downpour. His clothes were soaked, clinging to every definition of muscle that Emma could see, his dark blue t-shirt moving with every heave of his chest. Her eyes moved down, over the outline of his bulge now defined by the dampness of his pants and she felt herself suddenly become short of her own breath. When she looked back up to his face, hair dishevelled and clinging to his forehead, she noticed a drip as it fell from the tip of his nose and his eyes were wide with worry, the blue much brighter than she remembered as he searched her face for an answer.

“Emma,” he whispered, like it was the only word he could say. It held so much meaning, a question he needed to know the answer too, but as he searched her face for what he sought, Emma burst into tears.

Killian was over the threshold in a heartbeat, slamming the door behind him just before clutching her face in his hands and dipping his head down to attract her gaze again. Watery eyes tried to focus on his features but Emma couldn’t speak. All she could do was shake her head to tell him something was wrong, and Emma grabbed his hands, holding them to her face in an attempt to keep his warmth on her skin. Even after standing in the rain he was hot, a true Alpha trait, and Emma felt herself immediately calmed by his touch.

“Shh, my love,” Killian said calmly, stroking his thumbs over her cheeks to wipe away her tears, but his words caused a new wave to burst from her eyelids. “Oh, Emma,” Killian soothed, placing one hand on the back of her head and pulling her to his chest.

Her arms wrapped around him immediately, fingers interlocking behind his back and holding him tightly. Killian let her cry, let her expel all of her wails into the fabric of his t-shirt as he stroked her hair, his own tears burning the rims of his eyes. He pinched them closed in an attempt to halt the sob in his chest at how much she was hurting, and a single tear rolled down his still wet face and fell onto the fabric of Emma’s oversized shirt.

After rubbing her back for a good few minutes, and letting her cry until her energy was almost gone, Killian smoothed his hands over her shoulders and pulled her from his body. Her eyes were red, as was the rims of her nostrils, and she quickly wiped at her nose with the extra long sleeve of the white shirt. “Is this one of mine?” Killian asked her with a small smile and Emma coughed out a watery laugh at his attempt to distract her.

“Maybe,” she shrugged weakly.

“It looks good on you,” he said with a smirk, arching an eyebrow playfully.

“It smells like you,” Emma sobbed, a fresh set of tears causing her vision to blur again.

“Hey, now, don’t start that again,” Killian pleaded, rubbing her arms lovingly. “What’s got you all upset, love?”

Emma’s bottom lip quivered and she was unable to stop it. She opened her mouth to speak but the lump in her throat stopped any of the words from coming out.

“Is it something I’ve done?” Killian asked her urgently, the tips of his ears blushing with pink. Emma shook her head and real panic rose up from within him about their last encounter. “Something I’ve said?”

“It’s…It’s…,” Emma stammered, unable to find the words she needed.

“Is it me?” Killian forced himself to ask, his jaw clenching straight after the words left his mouth in nothing but a whisper. He hated himself for being so selfish but Emma instantly reassured him.

“Never,” she breathed, placing her hands on his face. “You’re everything to me.”

Killian heaved a sigh of relief. Emma’s words were exactly what he needed to hear, even if they were not the ones he wanted to hear. He hastily gave his face a wipe, another stray tear having fallen in joyous comfort.

“Then please, love, tell me.” His hands slipped down to hers, clutching her fingers in his and giving them a little shake.

Emma gave him a small nervous smile and a nod of assurance before giving his arm a gentle tug and leading him to the couch. Killian followed, letting his hand slip from hers just long enough for him to slip off his jacket and hang it over a stool as they passed by the kitchenette. Emma was already settling against the arm of the couch when he got to her and reached out to take her proffered hand.

“I have to go away,” Emma said softly.

“Away?” Killian repeated, his stomach falling away from him as he sat down and made sure there was no gap between them.

“To a spa,” Emma said, hanging her head. “With my best friend who is also Graham’s mistress.”

Killian let out the breath he had been holding and a nervous laugh. “Is that all?”

“For a week.” Emma looked over to him and he was still smiling.

“Love, that’s nothing. I’ll be here when you get back,” he promised, rubbing a hand over her knee.

“Graham says we are getting too close. He’s been watching us.” Emma’s confession had Killian narrowing his eyes and an envious rage boiled inside of him.

“How?” Killian licked his lips and shook his head. He didn’t need to know the answer really, because he had seen the same car parked outside with the same distinctive henchman behind the poorly blacked out windows as she had. “Are you safe?”

“I think so, but I don’t want to go and have Ruby fish around for information I know Graham has told her to obtain. It’s going to be so fake,” Emma pouted. “I don’t have a lot of people in my life I can trust anymore.”

“You have me,” Killian told her. “You’ll always have me.”

Emma was suddenly overcome with a warmth pooling inside her that she never thought could be felt at a time like this. Killian’s concern meant more than she could say, more than she could describe, and all she could do was launch herself across the sofa and into his awaiting arms. Killian fell backwards onto the cushions and Emma fell onto him, her mouth seeking his for a passionate kiss. He let her fall onto him, nestling her against his chest as she scrambled for his touch, clinging to his wet t-shirt and holding on for dear life, forgetting all of her troubles in an instant.

Emma kissed him hard, like he was going to be gone the second she opened her eyes, and Killian let her, his lips parting ever so slightly and tracing the seam of her lips. Emma obliged, her tongue slipping passed her teeth and into his mouth where it duelled with his in impetuous passion. Her hands clawed at the hem of his shirt, desperate to rid him of the fabric as quickly as possible, but her weight pinned it to his body because she was reluctant to let even a slither of light pass between their bodies.

Killian grew hard despite his intention to not become aroused and he could smell that Emma was too. She was coating his senses in a cloak of visceral need, the animal within him roaring to life at the mere scent of her, and before he could rationalise any thought, his fingers were fumbling with the buttons of the shirt she was wearing, desperate to get to the skin beneath. Emma shifted her position until her knees were on either side of his legs and tore her lips from his, pushing herself into a sit and helping him divest herself of the shirt.

“Are you alright, love,?” Killian breathed, his words a whisper.

“I am now,” Emma sighed. She was in such a haste to rid herself of the shirt that she tore the bottom two buttons off before wrenching it off her shoulders. She was naked underneath, expectantly or not Killian wasn’t sure, but he couldn’t help but watch the sway of her breasts as she wobbled atop his groin while her hands went to work on his pants.

“No, Emma, stop,” Killian ground out, hating his rational brain and grabbing her hands, halting her advances. It pained him to his very soul to stop her, and the look in her eyes, one of pure hurt, sliced right through him.

“Don’t you want me?” Emma whimpered.

“Aye, of course I bloody want you,” Killian assured her with a sure nod. He still found it absolutely baffling how someone as beautiful as Emma had such a low self esteem, but as usual, the answers to his many questions led right back to her sorry excuse of a husband. He sat up, a huge flat palm spreading out over the middle of her back to make sure she didn’t topple backward, and gave her a loving smile. “I know you’re scared he is going to stop this,” he began, skimming his other hand down the length of her arm and massaging her fingers. “Only the gods can express how unbelievably frightened I am of the same thing.” Confident she was well balanced now, Killian slid his hand up her back and buried it in her hair, cradling her head and holding her face to his. Their noses were pressed together side by side and he felt his breath hitch before he pressed his lips to hers for a quick, chaste kiss. “I meant it when I said I loved you, Emma, and I don’t think I know how to stop.”

Emma pulled her head back and Killian’s hand moved to comb her golden tresses through his fingers, eager as ever to reassure her that whatever worry she was feeling would be over with soon. She blinked, swallowing hard. Emma had never told anyone she had loved them, not even Graham. Sure she had told him, but it had always been after he had said it first, as fleeting as those times were, and she wasn’t exactly sure what it meant to love somebody as openly as Killian clearly loved her.

“I can’t-,” she began shyly, but Killian cut her off.

“You don’t have to say it,” Killian added softly, recognizing the turmoil in her features and giving her a boyish smile that melted her heart. He reached behind her for his shirt she had discarded and pulled it up over her back to cover her once more. “I just want you to know that you are loved, Emma, and despite what you might think, you are not worthless.”

Emma’s lips curved into an unsure smile, little ticks of the corners that were accompanied by a rosy blush across her cheeks and the bridge of her nose that told Killian she was not used to such compliments, something he thought of a as grievous crime against the beauty of both her body and soul. She deserved more than she had ever received and if Killian could offer her just a small piece of his heart, he would wait forever for her to fill the void it had left with the gift of a piece of her own.

“Not to me,” Killian added, reiterating his feelings with a smile. “And I do love you.” He stroked the back of his knuckles over the apple of her cheek and his heart warmed with how deep red her cheeks grew. “But we shouldn’t do this, not here, not if the place is being watched.”

Emma nodded in agreement. “You’re right,” she pouted.

“I’m always right, love,” Killian winked. “And when you return I promise to show you just much I want you.” There was a darkness to the tone of his voice that had a shiver running down Emma’s spine but as quickly as it had appeared, it disappeared in his next words. “And luckily for you, I’m soft.”

“Soft?” Emma asked, confused.

“Soft,” he repeated with a nod and a grin. When Emma’s brow furrowed he chuckled and took pity on her, sliding her from his lap and wrapping one big strong arm around her. “It means I like cuddling too, even without sex.”

Emma snuggled into his side, stretching an arm across his still soggy midriff and hugging him tighter with a content purr. “Me too,” she said softly, a smile breaking out across her face as wide as a mile when Killian turned his head and kissed her on her forehead. “I mean, the sex is great, but,” she teased and Killian’s chest rumbled with laughter.

“But?” Killian prompted her to continue with a little nudge.

“But this is nice too.” Emma had never really had much physical affection like Killian had given her, little touches here and there and now a full blown snuggle on the couch as if they were a real couple. It made her feel special, more than she ever had done, and somehow she was okay with tonight being a different kind of intimate.

–

Angry didn’t even begin to cover what Emma was feeling right now. Thank the Lord for small favours and her chauffeur being on call, because when she had insisted on her driver staying at the resort too, and Graham had obliged, more than likely because the tall, skinny man with small round glasses and a hat Emma was pretty sure was glued to his fake hair piece underneath was actually one of Graham’s many little birds whose favourite song was the Killian and Emma show, she’d had no idea that after just two lunches with Ruby, she would need him to drive her home.

Even thinking about that invasion of marital privacy had her blood bubbling with fury, let alone what she had been stewing on during the drive home after less than half the week at the spa. Was nothing sacred to the man? Emma had been trying so, so hard to fight her growing feelings for Killian, despite everything thrown at her, if not for Graham than for the sake of her reputation as a lady of elite society, a reputation that had helped her fashion out a little niche existence of her own. It wasn’t about being rich, or being able to rub shoulders with these people, but instead about her identity as an individual without Graham, and she still had friends in high places, and many endeavours that would not look favourably at an affair, but did Graham care?

Fuck no.

Clearly not, because if the truth bomb Ruby had just dropped in the lap was anything to go by, Graham didn’t give a flying fuck about her or the meager life she had tried to build for herself in his shadow. Ruby was pregnant and her ever doting husband was the father, apparently something he was thrilled about. However, perhaps the most telling indication of who he was as a person, was when, after telling Ruby how delighted he was for an heir, he told her that Emma would raise the baby with him, as if they had sired the next CEO of the Humbert empire together, totally disregarding the feelings of a mother who would have her tot ripped from her bosom quicker than he could wish he was an Alpha.

The only reason Ruby had told Emma was because she was leaving town to get an abortion and regardless of what had happened between Graham and herself, she still thought of Emma as her best friend, and the whole thing with Graham had been fun and games until she had missed a period. She would tell Graham the baby was dead and knew he wouldn’t waste resources following her to check. Emma understood completely. Ruby was one of her most valued real friends, someone who had been there for her through so much already, and she couldn’t imagine taking the woman’s child and trying to raise it as her own. She just couldn’t. And if Graham knew either of them, he would have realised how insane the idea even was in the first place.

The ride home hadn’t abated Emma’s vehemence towards her husband one bit. It wasn’t about her, and it wasn’t about Ruby, or the life inside of her, but it was about how he had, for so long, managed to breeze through life treating people like property. Emma was sick of it. She was sick of how he had treated every single person and events around him with such frivolity, like his life was a game and his actions had no real consequence. Maybe she was taking it a bit far, storming out of a spa and wellness resort in the middle of the afternoon with nothing but the clothes on her back, but Emma just had to give him a piece of her mind whilst her temper charged storm of emotions swirling inside of her still fuelled her every being. If not for any other reason than he deserved it.

The time it had taken Jeeves - Emma knew that wasn’t his name, but Graham had never let her know his real one for fear they had, ironically, begun an affair - to get her home, Emma’s rage hadn’t fizzled out one iota. She launched herself from the car quicker than it took Jeeves to put it into park, and raced across the expansive gravel driveway in the fading light of afternoon. The sun was heading down for the evening but Emma was wide awake knowing that Graham would be home at this time too, and with any luck, she would be interrupting something he deemed of the utmost importance.

As usual, when the door was opened for her, the lobby of their mansion was empty, cold and uninviting despite the rays of sunshines currently warming their mark into the stone floor. Absentmindedly Emma wondered if they had owned a dog, would it be sunning itself in the beams the way dogs often did, desperate to catch the last warmth of the day. Equally as unnecessary in her thought process, Emma wistfully wished for the carefree life of a pet, free to do whatever she wanted all day without being constantly reminded of how she was nothing but a dissatisfaction wearing an expensive wedding ring.

Boy, was Graham in for some kind of shit storm.

Eventually she found him in his study, after a few pointed directions from staff who thought better than to get in her way, and didn’t even try to hide her ire as she strode across the expansive Persian rug between them and, just as he turned to look at her in shock of her actually being there, slapped him across the face with an audible smack. Hard. Graham’s previously relaxed stance stiffened up in an instant, his eyes fluttering closed as he rearranged his jaw from one side to the other before clenching it closed. Emma was seething, positively vibrating with wrath, the tips of her fingers tingling from the impact that had left a rather telling mark across Graham’s cheek.

“Hello wife,” Graham spat, peeling his eyes open to give her a cold, dead stare. “Back so soon?”

“Don’t ‘wife’ me, you bastard,” Emma yelled, jabbing Graham in the shoulder with the heel of her hand.

“I take it Ruby opened her fat mouth,” Graham mumbled to himself, sighing dramatically. “I guess you know the rest, judging by the pain in my shoulder,” Graham sneered.

“Why the fuck would you think I would raise someone else’s child with you?” Emma shouted, eyes wide with her words.

“It’s not someone else child, Emma, it’s mine,” Graham growled, his voice low and his words ground out through his clenched teeth.

“Oh, that makes it all better!” Emma laughed.

“What are you so angry about?” Graham shrugged. “It’s not like you aren’t getting what you want out of this arrangement.”

He meant Killian and Emma knew it, swallowing the spiteful words that threatened to fall out of mouth back down where they could fester in her stomach some more. “And what about Ruby, huh? You think she is just going to give up her child?”

Graham turned and Emma was taken back by his calm demeanour. “The child is a Humbert. It will live with me and you are my wife, and as such you will be expected to raise it accordingly.”

“Accordingly?” Emma shook her head. “What the fuck, Graham? You really have no idea how your actions affect everyone around you, do you?”

They stared at each other, Emma shaking with exasperation and Graham as cool as ice, still and motionless. Emma watched the bob of his Adam’s apple as he swallowed, slowly and deliberately like he even had control over his body’s most basic instincts.

“The child will be raised a Humbert,” Graham repeated slowly, pushing his hands into his pockets and taking a few menacing steps towards her. Emma didn’t back down, squaring her shoulders and met his gaze with the same intensity he was giving her. “You will raise it as a Humbert.”

“I’m not some fucking wet nurse for your bastard, Graham!” Emma sniggered. “I will not raise someone else’s kid, and I will not let you manipulate this situation in your favour like you always do. This is a life, a human being, Graham, surely you realise that!” Emma waved her hands, trying to find any empathy behind the blue eyes staring back at her, but all she saw was a wall of stone.

“You are my wife,” Graham ground out. “You will obey me.”

Emma laughed, loud and heartily, her entire body moving with the deep, belly rumbling hilarity of Graham’s statement. “I won’t, and there is nothing you can do about it. What are you going to do? Divorce me?” Graham’s furrowed brow meant she had struck a nerve.

“Pity,” he huffed, looking down at his feet. He knew there was no way Emma wouldn’t do as he wanted. She might want to be with the Alpha more than him, but he was pretty confident that if it came down to it, she wouldn’t leave a defenceless babe to fend for itself. Graham would simply take the baby form Ruby and leave it with Emma, sure nature would take its course and she would be unable to not help, and over time they would become one big semi agreeable family. He smirked to himself, and Emma scoffed a laugh as if she could read his mind.

“I’m so sorry I’m such a fucking disappointment!” Emma spat at him and with her words, Graham snapped, his biceps bulging under his sleeve caps as he clenched his fists in his pockets.

“Disappointment?” He snapped. “What do you know about disappointment, huh? Maybe if you’d been the wife I was promised-,”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Emma cried, moving towards him and grabbing his arm as he attempted to turn away.

“Nothing, forget I said anything.” Graham shook her off and made for his desk, the decanter of whiskey already halfway to the bottom.

“No, no, go on,” Emma insisted sarcastically. She followed after him, giving him a little shove that spilled the whiskey right out of the glass in his hand. “I’d love to hear about how yet another one of your problems in life is caused by me.”

“Not this one you wouldn’t,” Graham cautioned. He lifted the cut glass tumbler to his lips and took a sip of the burning liquid, exciting all of his taste buds at once.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” Emma screeched, running her hands through her hair. “Ten years of marriage and you won’t even be honest with me?”

“You wouldn’t want honesty, Emma, trust me.” Graham finished the whiskey, pouring the last of the honey coloured drink into his mouth and swallowing the lot in one gulp. He pinched his eyes closed until the burn at the back of his sinuses passed but when he opened them, Emma was still as disgruntled as before.

“Trust you?” she said spitefully. “Graham Humbert, the almighty, the all powerful, the good for nothing burnt out Beta who wishes he was an Alpha so badly? Where has that ever got me before?”

Graham spun around and advanced on her, making Emma jump back for a second. His hands were on her face, clamping her jaw in his grip and silencing her long enough to stare into her eyes and cause real fear to spark behind the green hues. “I can tell you where it will get you if you don’t stop with this Ruby bullshit.”

“Well it won’t be a divorce, you’ve made that abundantly clear.” Her words were compressed through her lips but they made her point. Humbert men didn’t get divorced, or so Graham had pounded into her brain from the second she had married him.

He pushed her head aside and released her jaw and Emma immediately rubbed at the soreness there. He walked by her as if she wasn’t even there, like she was nothing, like he hadn’t put his hands on her and hurt her. “Oh there are worse things to do to you, Emma. Don’t push me.”

“Don’t push you? Oh, honey, I haven’t even begun!” Emma ground her teeth, stalking after him with heavy footsteps that echoed off the vast ceiling above them. “You’re a bully, Graham, plain and simple,” she shouted. “You use other people to get what you want and you always will, and I don’t know if this is some kind of bullshit Alpha complex run amok, but I’m sick of it!” Emma caught up with him and dipped sideways, reappearing in front of him and halting his escape attempt. “I’m sick of the lies, the cheating, the galas and fake smiles, pandering to all your important friends, and most of all, I’m sick of you!” Emma took a breath, balling her fists at her side. “You’ll never be an Alpha as long as you live so-”

Her words were cut short by an overwhelming thud and the instant Emma’s eyes filled with the stinging sensation of tears, she knew he had hit her. The moment was in slow motion, like an out of body experience, and Emma felt the point of Graham’s knuckles hit her under the eye in a back hand punch. It shook her, physically and emotionally, and her body flushed with white hot prickles of adrenaline that blinded her so much she didn’t see the next blow coming.

“Shut up!” Graham shouted, his words hidden behind the slap sound. “Shut your dirty whore mouth!” Graham roared, spittle dripping from his lower lip in his rage. He raised his hand again but paused when Emma cowered away. “You want some truth? Here, how about this for a truth. The only reason we took you in was because you were an Omega and I was supposed to be Alpha, that’s the only reason I married you.”

“What do you mean I’m Omega?” Emma snapped, the pain in her cheek radiating through her entire jaw as she gently pawed at the underside of her eye socket where the skin felt like it had split open.

“Come on, Emma, don’t be dense,” Graham sneered. “Have you ever wondered why you couldn’t remember seeing a doctor for your ‘illness’? Ever wondered why my family were so insistent on your medication? It’s a supressant, you dumb bitch!”

Emma’s entire life flashed before her eyes. It all made sense. Everything was much clearer. She was Omega, a completely different gender class that she had always believed, and the entire Humbert family knew about it, but had suppressed her nature with drugs. For a second Emma imagined what her life might have been if she had never had the misfortune of crossing paths with the Humbert family. Would she have married an Alpha? Would she have pups of her own? Her mind swirled with scenario after scenario, all of which had been ripped from her grasp by Graham and his family.

“All this time,” Emma whimpered angrily, shaking her head. “You knew and let me think I was sick.” Her rage boiled up inside of her and she felt her fists ball at her sides again, her feet carrying her closer to the man in front of her.

“And you would have never have found out if it wasn’t for that fucking Alpha,” Graham rasped, his nose wrinkling at the thought of Killian being more than he had ever developed into.

His misplaced rage was evident and Emma was quick to interrupt his fury with a balled fist pounding on his shoulder. “Leave him out of this. He doesn’t know anything.”

“Aww, did I hit a sore spot there, darling?” Graham leered, cocking his head to one side in mock sympathy. “I’m not a fool Emma. I know you two have been fucking without my prior consent!”

“Your prior consent?” Emma yelled. “Listen to you, trying to control my life, what I do and who I see.” She laughed, scrubbing her hands over her face with a sigh. “Well, newsflash Humbert, I’m not your property.”

“Newsflash, Emma, I’ll be suing the fuck out of Killian Jones to recover all of the money he took whilst still fucking my wife, and then, when he has nothing else left, I’ll take his brother’s bar. I know people who could get that place shut down like that!” To emphasize the power he had to do as he had threatened, Graham clicked his fingers right in her face, and Emma blinked in an attempt to fight her flight response.

“Why are you like this?” Emma asked, her voice turning softer, more sympathetic. She had been fond of Graham once, and they were friends for so long before they got married, so the man in front of her right now, the man who had dared to lay hands on her, was not the man she had once known. “What happened to that sweet, charming guy I married, huh? Look what you’ve become, Graham. Spoiled, hateful and with so much anger-,”

Another blow took Emma by surprise and she had no time to brace herself. Graham’s clenched fist hit her again in the same place and Emma was sure that that blow had split the skin under her eye now. She tumbled backwards, falling flat onto her butt and only narrowly avoiding hitting her head on the marble fireplace surrounding behind her.

“Because of you!” Graham bellowed, looming over her, the vein in his forehead bulging.

“It’s not my fault you didn’t become an Alpha!” Emma slapped the floor beside her to highlight her point. “That’s not on me!” Emma snapped.

“They said an Omega presence would draw it out of me, make me into the most powerful Alpha my family had ever seen, but no!” Graham yelled, shaking with anger. “We paid good money for you!” He accused, pointing at her. “You ruined me, you poor, good for nothing ungrateful Omega whore!” Graham raised his hand again, intent on making sure Emma felt this one, but she scrambled backwards across the floor, pushing herself to her feet when her back hit the solid door frame. “Now do me a favour and get the fuck out!”

When Emma pulled open the door, the cold air from the hall hit the welt under her eye and halted the throbbing pain when she blinked. Graham was hot on her heels, shoes pounding the stone floor and sending echoes into the hall. One of the staff was barged out of the way by Emma and stumbled into Graham’s path, slowing him temporarily and Emma took the opportunity to race for the front door. She yanked it open and couldn’t stop the tears from falling any longer. One of her shoes came loose and she kicked the other one off, ignoring the searing pain shooting up her legs as she tore across the gravel driveway.

“And don’t come back!” Graham yelled after her, the door knocker clattering as he slammed the door and cast her out into the night.

#cs fic #the contract #A/B/O #a/b/o dynamics #cs fanfic #alpha!killian #emma swan #tw: domestic abuse

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bereaving · 3 years

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You definitely don't need to apologize for that 😆 I do that too...

For me it's different cause I love the horror genre. Like not this random, boring clichee sort of horror but this really subtle and deep horror like in Hill House. I'm a huge fan of it. For me it wasn't really important what's it about, I just wanted to continue this anthology.

A lot of people say that honestly 🤔 it's different when you watch Bly first and then Hill House. But they both have a lot of similarities and I love that.

She is! And it's for sure that most of the time where people were going through a traumatic childhood, they turned out to be assholes. Like we have an example right next to Jamie on the same show - Peter. He went through that as a kid and he turned out to be abusive and toxic, mostly. So it's great to see that there's a different way to go with that or to deal with everything Jamie had to deal with as a kid and how she turned out to be as an adult.

So yeah that's really nice to see that people aren't the way you first think they are by how they act, you just need to get to know them and we did after her fantastic speech. I can't tell you how often I watched that because its one of my favorite scenes in the whole season. She definitely is one of the most important characters on the show. It's also a beautiful reference to how a flower needs it time to bloom and so do people, like you said.

I mean she's definitely holding herself back a bit, and she tries to wrap her flirting and overall conversations with Dani up with humor. I think that's a great way of showing someone you really care about them without being too forward. So yeah I agree with you on that she would make a move if she'd be completely sure that's it okay for Dani too. But she would definitely do it in a Jamie - like - way 😂 like acting all cool and being funny yk

Dani is bold af 😆 like she has shown us that so many times and it is refreshing to see. Cause if I'm being honest I didn't think of her that way when I first saw her. I thought she's cute and all but when I first got to know her backstory a bit I immediately changed my mind. Also the scene she had with Henry at the bar was bold af, I'd have never done that for sure 😅

And then everything that happens around her at Bly and with Jamie, no doubt at all.

Haha I had to laugh when Jamie said "who the hell knew" 😂 that was awesome and also gave Dani a feeling of relief. That was the first time she expressed her feelings, her real feelings, to someone she likes so much and no one blamed her for that.

I guess you can see it both ways. I hated how they decided to end it, like they just gave us all and then in the end they took it all away 😪 just seeing how Dani sacrificed herself and then no one even remembered her and she just has no choice but going to Bly again and die there, it was so hard to watch and to accept. And there's Jamie, alone, with just the memories of Dani and she keeps waiting for her to return till the end... that's just heartbreaking and I need to hold back myself from crying every time I even think about it.

It is a masterpiece, no doubt, but I just wish they would let them finally be happy for the rest of their days.

Yeah that's the thing when you watch Bly first I guess 😅 I knew Victoria will be in season 2, too. So I wasn't as surprised about it, but the fact that she played Nell just makes it change a bit. She nails playing those characters with real struggles and she brings them to life in a way I've never seen anybody do it 💯 her microexpressions are so spot on, like I don't even know what to say about it. These two characters are stucked in my head too. Dani a bit more than Nell but that's just because it's so long ago when I watched Hill House.

I mean definitely! I hope Amelia stays on the horror path that would be great for me 😂 also same here, I won't watch YOU I don't know why but it's probably the show in general seems to be not really my thing 😕 unfortunately I have to say...cause i don't get to see Victoria

I really hope they bring them both back to The Haunting Series, I'd love to see Amelia back there and Victoria too 👌 but I guess we have to wait a long time for that

We goin’ under the cut again because this one is also long, my friend haha

A horror two-timer such as myself really doesn’t have any other opinion other than the ones I’ve seen: Bly is and feels more gothic, whereas Hill House is more... I guess classically horror. They are both fantastic, and tbh I had no idea this is what horror does. I’d never looked into horror as a way of expanding the story, and Mike and his team had done that beautifully with The Haunting. Hours after I’d published the ask it occurred to me that the answer was so engrossed with Dani and Jamie that I’d completely forgotten to write about Peter lol whoops. He and Jamie are really two opposites of the spectrum. And in episode 7, I get that the whole deal for that is to get a better insight into his background, and what shapes him and what made him the way that he is. I enjoyed it as a casual watcher, and I liked OJC’s portrayal of him, but to be completely honest, I left that episode with very little added empathy for him. I’ve seen people like him enough both in real life and in fictional portrayals. I know what it’s like to be in the presence of people like him, and it is not in any way pleasant. So yeah, Peter, as this post so eloquently put it, can choke.

Jamie on the other hand... 🥰 Have I mentioned I love her? Lemme just say it again, just because.

Re: “I’m so glad you stayed” scene: That whole tracking shot... ugh, it just gives me goosebumps. I have seen it more than once and every time I need the scene for GIFs or anything, I’d always watch from the moment Owen’s car drives away. These two smol wives own my heart and my soul, and I love them a lot a lot.

Re: the ending Completely understand where you’re coming from, and it’s not something that I can casually think about or even try to sit with without some sort of mental preparation -- like taking a deep breath before you go for a deep dive. It still hurts, I still get sad and cry about the way their story had to end. But, that being said, to me it doesn’t feel like a disservice to their journey. It wasn’t done just for the sake of dramatization, or to show any kind of... hidden morality message, or anything like that. There’s no agenda to the story, is maybe a more succinct way of putting it. Just like any other couples we would see on screen, it treats them with respect. I think we all wish, deep down inside, that they would be able to shake off The Lady and live their best lives, but... I don’t know. Personally, I don’t think it would’ve stayed or created this big of an impact if they were to just ride off into the sunset together.

Another thing to add is how good Bly is at exaggerating and amplifying aspects of real life and making it to be an element of the story. Some people forget you, some people will always wait for you and want to be with you. Some things, you do without thinking and it becomes a habit. Sometimes you lose yourself. Sometimes you’re stuck in circumstances or places you don’t really want to be in, but have to due to obligations and responsibilities. Some places really do have a pull of their own. Sometimes people love wrong, and it consumes you. Sometimes people love right, and it saves you. Maybe that’s just me and my takeaway from it, though. Last time I said Bly has changed the course of my 2020, and by that I mean that it’s taught me to have feelings again, to re-examine things, to care. And I just... love this series. Sadness and all.

MOVING ON 😆 I bow to Victoria. Ari ( @camhowes ) was the one who encouraged me to watch Bly in the first place, and so naturally once I started Hill House I messaged her and said, “I can’t believe Dani and Nell are played by THE SAME ACTRESS???????????” My freak out over her is not over yet, and I am begging anyone to let her be in all the things. I’ll fucking watch it (again... other than You) The way Nell breaks my heart... One of my friends who’s been a long Hill House champ has repeatedly said to me that Theo is the most fascinating sibling, and while I agree to a certain extent... Nell has my heart.

When it comes to Netflix’s You... to be completely blunt, a story that is pitched as “stalker man show, he kills people” is just not gonna appeal to me in general. No offense to anyone but there are just too many men I do not give a squat about. I don’t know if my resolve with this show will change. There’s been a couple sets of Love Quinn that I’ve seen (when she goes to the market in a beanie, or when she’s cooking and baking and drinking wine, or when she apparently went full on revenge baking mode) that are intriguing and is chipping away at my resolve, but... yeah, for the moment, I’m staying away from that series.

And I’m just gonna put a thought out into the universe, that if Miss Amelia Eve is hiring anyone to help her with her dog-walking business, I am available and can start ASAP.

#ask #anonymous #it's another long one folks #thobm asks

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daydreaming-jessi · 4 years

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Lmao guess who’s dealing with an existential crisis so she decided to write more for the Beetlejuice cat au???? If you wanna see the previous posts then just go to the shoggoth au tag on me blog kk

So, now Charles and Delia go from having 0 cats in the house to suddenly having 5.

It’s worse than the sudden ghosts

Because! Charles is allergic to cats! Emily was allergic to dogs, it’s why they never had any pets in the house before.

But he can’t exactly say no he’s seen shoggoth bring Lydia down from sudden panic attacks in like ten minutes and the kittens just lessen the panic attacks altogether!

Delia points out that the house aura has never felt better than when the cats were there. He sighs a heavy dad sigh and resigns to like twenty years of constantly taking Benadryl. (Shoggoth has also declared him a perfect nap lap and he also seems to be doing so much better mentally with the cats around. He likes seeing the kittens trample over each other after string sue him)

Barb and Adam are ecstatic!! Barb just adores animals! She had all kinds growing up, like snakes, lizards, fish, dogs, rodents, ferrets, and especially cats!!

I personally think she may have grown up on a farm, thus was constantly around animals (and doing hard work making her ultra strong).

Adam is more into bugs and snakes, but he loved fostering cats whenever he and barb took in a batch of christmas kittens, and these guys are so! Smart! Shoggoth has figured out how to open the attic door to sunbathe in the windows in the afternoon and the kittens have learned how to fetch! For them! When they need something for their town model!!!! (They of course are specially made for the model)

They name one kitten Patchie because it’s just so splotchy with it’s black and white fur and looks like a mini version of his mom but like a printer ran out of ink while making him. Beej tells them they are the most basic people he’s ever known and he loves them

Delia loves the cats, shoggoth will supervise Delia’s morning yoga everyday, sometimes joining in her own kitty way, and the kittens jumble up everywhere in the kitchen and garden whenever she is working in there, But one kitten... one kitten!

Delia swears they have some strange competition going on! This kitten pops out of nowhere and scares the daylights out of her every time! It is exactly like Lydia! (Lyds, Beetlejuice, stop laughing, it’s true!)

Lydia grins deviously and names this lil tabby brown lad Azazel. Beej cackles in the background while Delia is a lil confused.

But there’s this other fluffy black kitten with the most gorgeous dark eyes, and it reminds her so much of Lydia as well, so she names that little baby Circe. Lydia and Beej secretly think this is the coolest thing ever. Charles just smiles fondly and is ever more grateful for this eccentric lady that has become a part of their lives. Adam and barb think Delia is a delight (lol)

But there’s one kitten. One lil tabby black girl that’s just... dumb.

Like, you never think cats can be dumb, they’re so graceful and elegant and just.... smart! But this one kitten...

Shoggoth seems to always be supervising this kitten and yet it still gets in trouble. She’s managed to lock herself in the guestroom closet twenty two times- make that twenty three. (Charles get the coat hanger, she’s done it again!)

This kitten doesn’t seem to be mentally lacking behind her brothers and sister, she just... doesn’t seem to think things through.

Whenever someone takes a bath she wants into the bathroom, and she’ll want to sit in their laps while they’re in the bath so she’ll jump in without realizing that the human is... in a bath. Of water. Many times a soggy black shadow will sprint down the stairs away from the bathroom while someone in there laughs.

Beej took it upon himself to name this kitten.

“Her name... is Beef.”

“... Beej that is the worst name I’ve ever heard.”

“No, no, my mother is the one that’s come up with the worst name ever and that’s calling your son Beetlejuice instead of Lawrence in front of everyone they know forever sealing his fate as beetlejuice.”

“.... Beej you okay?”

“I am never okay Lyds.”

Beef is a special kitten that Shoggoth seems to stretch herself thin trying to keep in check. The parents can relate when this cat comes into the living room at night looking haggard and crashing on the nearest soft surface to pass out for twelve hours away from her kids currently crowded on lydia’s bed.

Many of lydias photography now include dozens of pictures of the cats (and pics Beej had a hand in choreographering). The cats being goofy, the cats being majestic, shoggoth is a star in many creepy photos, being a cat that just screams bad luck with her one eye and crooked tail, there’s one of Delia about to be scared by azazel that always cracks lyds up

Lydia feels her aesthetic is complete when she goes out walking five cats on harnesses wearing full mourning clothes and her camera while electric green haired Beej follows wearing college sweatshirts and jogger handmedowns from Charles. What is this aesthetic? Hell if she knows.

If you can’t find Beej anywhere he’s most likely where the cats are. He loves to nap in the sun with shoggoth, he loves slinking around the shadows with azazel, he loves playing with patchie in the wood shavings of the maitlands model town carving, he loves drifting after beef as she gets in mischief. Sometimes he’ll be sitting down and suddenly the cats all climb on top of him and take a nap, and he’s just still and suddenly at peace and doesn’t need to do anything else. He just, really loves these cats.

It’s kind of scary for him, since they have a much shorter life span than breathers do, and he’s not entirely sure where animals go when they die. He’ll get really quiet sometimes thinking about death and how suddenly it can change his entire life when before it was basically all he knew. He feels much better when shoggoth begins grooming his crazy hair and Lydia shows him another breather thing or Delia asks him to go shopping with her, or the maitlands ask him questions about ghost things, or Charles shows Beej another cool house he’s selling.

Head cannons of Beetlejuice now lives with the deetz time

Everyone... tries to get used to beetlejuice. Delia makes the most surprising progress. Within two days she’s calling Beej Lawrence and both him and Lydia are helping her make breakfast in the morning before he helps her with her garden and dusting her crystal collection. She’s pretty much adopted him like she instantly adopted Lydia when Charles hired her.

Charles has some reservations. This guy tried to marry his daughter, chased him and Delia out of their house, getting him fired from his job, and tried to kill him several times. But then he sees what Delia sees.

And what did Delia see?

A kid. Just, a kid that was really badly abused by his mom. He has abandonment issues from losing his dad and basically learned that the only way to get people to be nice to is by manipulating them. People don’t love you, Lawrence, you’re a useless mess of a boy that’s good for nothing and has no friends. Love is not for people like you.

Charles joins the Beej protection squad lyds and Delia have formed pretty quickly after that.

It’s harder for Adam and barb. They both are still a little scared of Beej. They would be cool with him, but he harassed them a lot before. Lydia can’t blame them but she also knows that Beej struggles to understand personal boundaries and really does have a big crush on them. Lydia is helping Beej better understand personal space (she had a tough time with it too when she was younger) and he’s learning to not force himself on others quite so much.

Beej really does like the maitlands, they’re stable, really in love with each other, actually genuinely nice, they’re kind of the coolest couple of newlydeads he’s ever met. He... wants to be a part of that. But he’s not completely sure how to join that. His usual tactic of overtly sexual actions usually work all the time, but not here. They enjoy... genuine affection??? Who??? What??? What do you mean you like me for my personality my personality is depressed garbage?

Lydia is relieved. No more keeping secrets from her family. Her pseudo brother best friend is now summoned again, being on his best behavior and allowed to stay with them and is now also healing from his mom troubles, and she has five cats now. Nice. Dead mom would love this new family Lydia and Charles made themselves. They love it too.

Of course, this doesn’t mean Lydia and Beej haven’t given up their favorite pastime.

Whenever Delia and Charles are out, and the maitlands are busy up in the attic, the two share an evil grin, and start to call some numbers, ready to hear that beautiful sound once more.

Now with the added bonus of cat yowls and howls. That really freaks people out.

What? Just because he’s getting over trauma and is a part of a loving family doesn’t mean Beej is a better person now. It just means his mom isn’t holding him back anymore >:3

So... what happens when Juno comes back wanting revenge on her no good son?

Lemme know if y’all wanna hear anymore of this au or have ideas of your own I’m kinda on a beetlejuice kick rn lol

#beetleb@bes dni plz #beetlejuice broadway #beetlejuice the musical #beetlejuice the broadway musical #beetlejuice #lawrence beetlejuice shoggoth #lydia deetz #charles deetz #delia deetz #adam maitland #barbara maitland #shoggoth au #beetlelands #uh oh did i leave a cliffhanger #do i support beej and lydia being on the spectrum? yes. hes also adhd

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neshabeingchildish · 4 years

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Hensley & Char: Friends or Whatever || Part 3

@just-a-j-reallly @junknstu1f @henryharts I absolutely pushed this bad boy out in a couple of hours, since I’m trying to hold myself to a somewhat organized schedule, with going back to a second job on mornings that I don’t have to work nights. If there are typos and such, please just remember that this is free and that I am busy. Lol. I promise, whenever I’m not pressed for time and energy, I do everything to give y’all my best, but when I am those things, my best has to dwindle a little, in terms of editing, hopefully not content. I’ve been missing Chasper, so this chapter is kind of Chasper heavy, from Hensley’s view of them, and also I wanted to get into the universe that we’re more familiar with, so while I didn’t feel like certain things needed to change - like meeting Ray and getting the job, I wanted to just sort of do the ff thing we do and look at other areas of the world while all of that was happening.

The Danger Befriends

“We’re almost 12. Her issues might strictly be hormones, and maybe that means that she’ll be less mean soon,” Jasper said.

“Shut up about hormones!” Charlotte snapped at him. “You ALWAYS blame women being rightfully angry with you on hormones! It’s NOT hormones, Jasper. It’s YOU. YOU are the reason we’re mad!”

Hensley didn’t want to get in the middle, but these were both her beast friends and she knew that this was all just a misunderstanding. Jasper wasn’t inconsiderate or stupid… Just very, very gullible. This was dirt from Jupiter all over again. “Jasper,” Hensley said, as gently as she could, “I think what Charlotte means is that instead of telling us the reason why you’re holding a filthy cat instead of our carnival tickets, you’re focused on her reaction to the fact that you handed a stranger the money for the tickets and they gave you a disgusting animal.”

“She’s not disgusting. She just needs a bath…” Jasper said, but before he could complete the thought Charlotte lunged towards him and Hensley had to collect her in a restraining hold to keep her from getting her hands on Jasper. Jasper’s eyes widened and Hensley cooed in Charlotte’s ear to try to calm her.

“It’s okay, Char. It’s Okay. I carried a little extra money and I’LL get your ticket. Okay?It’s all good. It’s ALL good.” Charlotte struggled Hensley’s hold off of her and glared at Jasper, shaking her head, before she marched off and went to stand in line, herself.

Jasper shook his head, “I think that a good counselor and perhaps even medication will help her with that.” Hensley just sighed. He had a point, but he also missed the point. But, moments later, a guy in a trench coat really did come back with their tickets and three drinks, because they were waiting out in the sun with his cat.

Hensley pulled Charlotte from the line, explained that this time, Jasper hadn’t screwed up and Charlotte said, “Well, it still was careless and under normal circumstances would have been a scheme.” Then, they got on rides and all was forgotten for a while.

The moments where the three of them had fun and enjoyed each other’s company were Hensley’s favorite. She frequently felt like she had to pick sides because they argued so much. Jasper loved Charlotte. He had always liked her as a person and spending the past couple of years around her only accelerated that for him. The three were together everyday and always made plans as a team. No one would be left behind, because to Hensley, that would feel like choosing between them. And she really couldn’t.

Jasper was her yes man. Charlotte was her voice of reason. Those were things that she needed to always receive both of in order to make good decisions. She did not always make them, but she couldn’t comprehend what life would be without the two varying options. They were like the little angel and devil on her shoulders, except Jasper was the clueless angel and Charlotte the all knowing devil. You’re SUPPOSED to listen to the angel, but this particular angel was only right every now and then. The devil was always right, but she was an angry little person and threatening… That made her truth seem like it wasn’t so. Yet, she was usually right, and Hensley only SOMETIMES listened to her.

But, in those moments whenever Jasper couldn’t be around - they flowed better. And in the moments that Charlotte didn’t show her face, Hensley and Jasper made more sense. It was… confounding to Hensley. She NEEDED both of them, but it was so much easier to deal with them separately, usually. She wondered if they were like that too. Did Jasper and Charlotte have a harmonious dynamic whenever Hensley wasn’t there to demand both of their attention? She wondered what that was like.

She imagined that Jasper was sweet and that in spite of herself, she would soften for him and smile a lot, maybe even giggle… She… kinda felt a little bit jealous about it. WHAT did Charlotte and Jasper do whenever SHE wasn’t there? Sometimes, if they studied together, or Charlotte’s mom gave him a ride home or something, even at times, he stayed the night over there??? WHAT? They could barely get along, WHY would he be able to sleep in the same room as her? AND… He was a boy!

Hensley watched Charlotte reading and Jasper leaning up against her, getting ready to fall to sleep. She made a frowning face at him and he quickly shuffled away and made a makeshift, non-Charlotte pillow of his over shirt and backpack. But, when he drifted off, Hensley noted that Charlotte sighed, grabbed a bandanna out of her bag, wiped his sweat off and tucked the bandanna in his pocket. Why had she done that? Did she LIKE him? Why was Hensley so preoccupied with these details?

Charlotte stared at her and looked confused for a moment, then figured it was because of what just happened. She explained, “Jasper’s medication for his sweating problem has changed. The new one makes him a little more tired. I don’t want him sweating all over me or my carpet.” Rational. Reasonable. Nothing to be concerned about, and even if it WAS… She wouldn’t be concerned, because she and Charlotte were just friends anyway. Just like Charlotte and Jasper were. But then, “He looks different when he sleeps. When he’s shut down and silent - he’s actually cute, right?” Charlotte asked.

Of course, she meant like a roly poly rodent, but Hensley just heard cute and while she agreed, denied it. “Jasper? Cute?” She laughed. “Why don’t you just kiss him?”

“I would get sweat on my lips,” she said, cringing, “Jasper sweat. I don’t even want my own sweat on my lips…” She looked at Hensley like she was extremely gross for even attempting such a joke, and Hensley relaxed and didn’t think about it again.

There was no way that Charlotte liked Jasper. He wasn’t gross, but Charlotte found a lot of his habits to be. Plus, he irritated her very easily and even though she was nice to him sometimes, there was just this… Hensley couldn’t find the right word to describe a disconnect, so she thought of it as a no-no region… Though that sounded like their private parts, so she just simply stopped trying to find words and counted it as “would never happen.” Yet, she spent about a year convincing herself that Jasper and Charlotte were just friends and woul;d always just be friends.

It was hard though. That Charlotte had two best friends of different genders who both liked girls and she seemed to like both of them sometimes and like neither of them sometimes. All of Hensley’s life, there were people who would say things like she and Jasper would wind up dating someday or that they were probably soul mates/would get married, etc. They made it out to be like boys and girls couldn’t have friendships that were just that and it never moved her before because she knew that Jasper was not her type. She and Jasper had the SAME type, for as long as she could remember thinking about it. But, now… That could/might include Charlotte.

Charlotte wasn’t really the kind of girl that Hensley tended to be attracted to, but by 13, she definitely had become aware that it was probably because she didn’t see other girls that were like Charlotte, and that she hadn’t for as long as she had been in school, and not because Charlotte wasn’t totally pretty. She absolutely was. But, the more time went by, the more she realized that despite that Jasper had always noticed Charlotte. He knew her name. He knew about her plans and her life. He treated her like a person who he cared about… and he did this before she became Hensley’s best friend. It wasn’t a competition, but Hensley had a problem not competing.

The feelings were exacerbated whenever Hensley happened upon a part time job… No, Charlotte found her a part time job. Hensley was now, not only a productive member of society, but the actual sidekick to Swellview’s superhero, Captain Man, and that required secrecy and discretion. That required leaving Jasper and Charlotte alone and going to work to keep the city safe, to keep them safe… and she made an oath never to tell them.

“Why aren’t we allowed to stop by your job?” Charlotte asked, while Jasper drank from his bucket thermos as they walked from school. “We aren’t going to ruin anything, and we just wanted to be able to look around and possibly even make a purchase and contribute to your paycheck. You barely let us in the door…”

Hensley nervously laughed and shook her head, “I… don’t need your money for my paycheck. You two don’t even have jobs..”

“Yeah, upon further research, I found out nobody really hires 13 year olds for anything…” Charlotte started.

Jasper quickly spouted out, “Oh, it’s illegal. It’s one of Swellview’s many stupid laws.”

“It’s not just a Swellview law, though. It’s most places. My research concluded that the jobs available for kids under 16 are generally permissions for entrepreneurial ventures, Internet personalities, highly regulated child celebrity gigs, and family businesses where they aren’t actually on payroll. I wonder why the junk store doesn’t have to follow those regulations…” Charlotte said, suspiciously. The last thing that Hensley needed was Charlotte being suspicious.

Jasper offered, “It may be a historic building, in which case, in Swellview, they are allowed to hire as early as 13, but only in a part time capacity, and if the training for said job is at least one year.”

“That’s gotta be it! Ray’s father bought the place when he was a kid,” Hensley said, unsure of what even constitutes as a historical building, but hoping that Charlotte wouldn’t investigate it. She wasn’t even paying attention to her, though.

Charlotte smiled at Jasper, “You really know Swellview laws.”

“One of Dad’s main rules is if he ever has to get a call that I’ve been arrested, it better be a misunderstanding,” Jasper said with a shrug.

“You almost always get in trouble at every bit of fault of your own,” Charlotte told him.

“Yes, but not illegally.”

Hensley was happy to have the conversation off of her work.

Jasper’s dad was a defense attorney, so Jasper knew a lot about laws and ordinances and stuff. Maybe that was why he was so good in social studies and language arts. He knew laws, history, and wordplay. Charlotte was good with sciences and math. Between the both of them, Hensley was able to keep her head above water in school. She would need them now more than ever, because her job as Kid Danger was taking everything out of her and she hadn’t even been doing it for very long. But, whenever she looked at her two friends, who bickered like an old married couple, but also loved on each other, she knew that this job wasn’t just about the money or even the newfound high of fame. It was about what was best for Swellview. For Hensley Hart, Swellview was her two best friends…

“So… Can we stop in sometime, though?” Charlotte asked, not being deterred.

“Oh, my boss Ray is kind of a stickler about it…” Hensley said.

“Probably doesn’t want something to happen where he has a liability,” Jasper said.

Charlotte looked disappointed as she shrugged her shoulders and tugged Jasper’s sleeve, “Well, I guess that means we’ll see you tomorrow. Jasper gave Hensley a hug and the two walked beyond the store, debating whether they were going to get snacks before heading to Charlotte’s, or trust that her mom had something other than organic/vegan/no added sugars or flavors stuff that Jasper always felt like was a crime against taste buds…

Hensley went into the store. Just another day of Danger, for her. And her friends would be alright.

#Friends or Whatever #Hensley and Char: Friends or Whatever #Hensley Hart #Girl! Henry wlw AU #Henry Danger #Nesha HD Fics

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theyrealllegends · 5 years

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Roger Headcanons

My first request, whoop! “do you think you could do some really fluffy headcanons or a short story for roger and his female partner? Maybe how he takes care of her when she’s sick, or cuddling after a hard day, or just snowy day cuteness or something :)”

Author’s Note: i loved writing these, I just wrote all of them, lol! They’re my first headcanons though, I hope I did them right?

Words: ~1.8k

Enjoy 💕💕

Taking care of you when you’re sick

Rog would be woken up by you coughing in your sleep and he’d pull you closer, holding you until it finally stops. He brushes your hair out of your sweaty forehead and pecks your shoulders softly.

“You need to change, love? I can get you a shirt?” -“One of yours?” “Oh, you got shirts of your own?”

He loves sleeping in but when you’re sick, he forces himself to get out of bed and prepares some tea for you to have, still cuddled up in bed. He’d get in bed again to have you rest against his chest, running his fingers over your arm and humming some song silently

He’d attempt to make you breakfast again if you wouldn’t know about his non-existing abilities to hard boil eggs, but he doesn’t want you to have to do anything while you’re too weak to even stand. So he just makes you comfortable on the couch, sets the TV up for you and leaves you with a lot of tea to return with fresh waffles and some medicine to relieve the pain in your throat

“How are you feeling?” You could set a clock after it, he’d ask every thirty minutes while you were awake

“My throat is hurting”, you might reply and he’d be sorry, you could tell but at one point, his eyes started sparkling. “You know what they say might help”, he’d suggest, giving you a sexy grin but you’d still snort, hitting his forearm. “You wish!” You even leant into him, to a point where he’d already closed his eyes, waiting for your lips to touch his. You’d feel his warm breath on your mouth and you’d want nothing more than kiss him right then but you force yourself to back off. “I don’t want to make you sick as well, Rog.” “You’d take the best care of me, I’d be fine.” “You just want me to kiss you.” “That’s true”, he’d admit it, still giving you that flirtatious grin.

He’d try to argue with you if you shouldn’t see a doctor when you didn’t get better after three days. He was worried and also he just wanted you to feel better, accepting the fact that antibiotics might fasten up the process more than his love.

He’d run his hands through your hair until you fell asleep and then continue to softly stroke your arms and back. When you were awake, he’d offer you massages, ask if you wanted to take a bath or if he should take you on a drive - anything that came to his mind, that you might see as a cute gesture, he’d suggest it to make you feel better and maybe forget that you had a hard time breathing and hearing through your flu.

He’d literally do anything to make you more comfortable on the couch or in the bed. At times, you’re wrapped in three different blankets and resting again at least ten pillows. Other times when you just wanna get out of everything, fevery sweat all over your body, he’d wrap your legs in cold towels or put one on your forehead to keep you cuddled in under the covers.

Cuddling after a hard day

You’d come home, throwing the door shut behind you and slipping off your heels, kicking them wherever. Your handbag and keys go on the sideboard without any attention, almost wiping some envelopes off the surface. Your coat follows, just thrown onto a chair next to the actual shoe rag. You’d take off your bra as well, unable to deal with it’s tightness that seemed to choke you.

“Whoa there, what’s going on?”, Roger would say when he saw that. His smile would fade quickly when he noticed the angry tears in your eyes. “That fucker of a coworker again?” “My boss is on his side with that new client, it’s disgusting.” “I should punch them.” “But I need that job.” “You know you don’t actually.” “What do you mean?” He’d guide you to the couch to sit you down and you’d put your legs on his lap so you’d be more comfortable. “I can and would provide for you. I’d love to, actually. You wouldn’t have to deal with these dumbasses anymore and could join the boys and I on tour instead. And I could take you everywhere you liked it when we weren’t.” “That sounds amazing but I don’t wanna be just a famous guy’s girl, you know that.” “I know, y/n, I’m sorry, I didn’t’ -“ “Don’t be, it’s fine. I’d love to come back to that in some years. I just don’t want to think about it right here and right now.” “That’s perfectly fine, love.” He’d lay down next to you, just softly running his fingertips over your arm.

“I should accidentally run into his car. Or scratch it with my keys.” “Outsch”

“I’m just - Rog, he’s such a stupid fucker, oh my god!” “I know, babe, I know”, he’d just whisper while he’d kiss you neck to distract you. He hated to see you cry, of course but he didn’t know what to do against it except for one thing, while he didn’t know if you were up for that right then and there. His fingers would sneak under your blouse and his lips would find that sensitive spot behind your ear, making you forget about the stress a little. “I’m sorry, but you’re so sexy when you’re angry. Tell me to stop if you don’t wanna -“ “It’s fine, Rog.”

He was a good distraction after all. Not only the sex but also how glorious he’d look afterwards. His eyes were a little sleepy and his lips would trail over your body lazily while you’d eventually be his little spoon so you could both watch TV. But rather than that, you’d want to see how wild his hair had gotten from your grip on it, blonde strands sticking to his forehead in dried sweat. He’d literally look like a greek god. And you knew if you’d say that out loud, it’d give you a round two…

“Seriously, do you think I should look for another job?” “You loved working there before they hired that idiot.” “Yeah…” “No matter what, you can call me and I’ll be there to rip them apart.” “They don’t even know I’m with you, I guess.” “Why not?” “Well, some of them know but I don’t talk to my boss too often and that fucker didn’t deserve knowing that.” “Does he like Queen though?” “I have no idea but I don’t think he got that good of a taste.” “Hmmm.”

The next day, Roger showed up in front of your office to pick you up after your shift. He was leaning against his red Jaguar convertible and there was a huge bucket of white roses in the backseat, making the girls you worked with break out in awe. “Is that -“ that dumbass that never failed to get on your nerves, asked, stopping in his tracks and making the people that wanted to exit the building behind him moan in annoyance. “Roger Taylor, yeah”, somebody else told him. “Y/N is his girlfriend.” “No way!”, you heard him say and when you turned around to him, a winning smile on your lips, you could swear he turned pale at the realisation where he was in life and where you were. You walked over the street to Roger, who picked you up and spun you around like he always did. “You’re the best fucking boyfriend in this world!” “You mean best fucking boyfriend or best-fucking boyfriend?”, he asked in a low voice while he held the car’s door open for you, making you giggle like a schoolgirl.

Snowy day cuteness

You’d wake up and see the snow outside the kitchen window when you went there to make yourself a coffee. You love the sight and the fact that it’s gonna be Christmas very soon but at the same time you’re worried about the traffic and how you’re supposed to make it to work. You’re a young teacher and you don’t want to fail your students or be called out for not showing up.

“I can take you”, Roger would offer when you told him while you got dressed. “I don’t wanna bother you.” “Love, you don’t bother me, ever. It’s not a big deal, let me take you. Also, I can see the others in the studio afterwards.” “Okay”, you’d finally agree, giving him a smile through your make-up mirror.

Roger would swallow every curse he had on his lips so you wouldn’t feel bad to make him drive through the snowy streets. They were beautiful and really romantic and you loved it, especially with all the Christmas lights, but Roger was stressed because the streets were icy and it was dangerous to brake or to go fast or anything he would’ve wanted to do if it was a normal day.

You’d arrive to the school only to realise it was closed, Snow Day. Perfect. “I’m so so so sorry!” “Love, don’t be! I could’ve turned on the radio and they would’ve told us.” “Don’t blame yourself, Rog, please!” “Don’t worry.” He truly wasn’t angry, he was glad he’d have you home for the whole day. “But what about the boys?”, you’d ask, worried he ignored his band duties. “It’s not important”, he’d assure you when you returned to your apartment. He’d make hot chocolate for you to warm up and then get on the couch with you, turning on Doctor Who. “Let’s just lie here and do nothing until we’re getting hungry, shall we?”, he’d suggest, making you lean in to kiss him. “I love that.” “I love you.” “Oh yeah, I love that idea and you, too.”

Eventually the two of you go back to sleep, hugging each other tightly, one of your legs in between Roger’s, the other one around his hip. You wake up to his hands in your hair, going through your strands over and over again, making you press your face into his chest even more. “I love you”, you whisper into him, making him chuckle before he’d press a kiss to your forehead. “And I love you, y/N.”

#request #thess writes #roger taylor #roger taylor x you #roger taylor x reader #roger taylor fluff #roger taylor fanfic #queen #queen fanfic #fanfiction #bohemian rhapsody #bohrap fanfiction

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lifeofnickripley · 5 years

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Game of Thrones: Fav characters and characters I dislike

(Long post) Kay so, today is the premiere of the final season, guess I'll do my top Ten favorite characters(it is pretty much my favorite show of all time). Show only since I have yet to read the books. If you wonder my opinion on any character not mentioned I either forgot to mention them or I didn't think they really earned a spot on the lists. Yes I do censor things in this a bit buuut I want my web comic to have a wider audience so yea, deal with it. (SPOILER WARNING, at this point, if ur not caught up tho, you have only yourself to blame) Liked Honorable mentions: - Melisandre - before I found out bout the necklace, I had the HUGEST crush on her. She's evil, yes, but she adds a sense of wonder and magic to the show, so I still like her character (other than that necklace scene obviously). Plus Jon wouldn't be back if it weren't for her so haters gonna hate. - Bronn- if he doesn't get his damn castle...lol I doubt I need to say why this wise cracking sword for hire is a favorite, I think most people love him. - Yara Greyjoy - Badass pirate/Viking chick on the high seas? Hell yeah! Plus I love Greyjoy armor, I don't doubt Euron will probably kill her though. - Oberyn Martell - Awesome character, the Red Viper was fierce with a spear and even moreso with his attitude. Unfortunately his pride wound up being his undoing in the end, arguably one of the most effective deaths in the series. - Tormund Giantsbane - How can you not love this absolute bro? I don't even like Brienne and I ship them. Geniune badass. - Jorah Mormont - Lord of the Friend zone, his loyalty makes him one of my favs, not top ten tier though - Petyr Baelish: The events of Game of Thrones wouldn't have happened without this slimy bastard. He was smart and cunning (which made him fun to watch) and though his death was cool, the build up was kind of weak (weird Sansa/Arya storyline) Favorite characters: 10.) Ned Stark - Everyone's original favorite character, his death cemented that GOT wasn't f*ckin around. I mean, damn, still a brutal death scene to watch to this day. Props to Sean Bean for making his so awesome. He was honorable to a fault in a dishonorable world. 9.) Ramsey Bolton - Kay, so I might get some flack for this one, but he was a great bad guy. I mean he was legit terrifying and despicable! Made the Battle of the Bastards have an entirely different level of intensity than most of the battle scenes. Dude was an absolute monster, but unlike another widely disliked villain, this psycho got his own hands dirty instead of beckoning others to. His death scene was poetic but I kinda wanted it to be gorier. (I'm an edgelord though) 8.)Jon Snow - Awesome character, obviously I dig him, so why so low on the list? Honestly, there's characters I like more. But he's still really cool, definitely has the best fight scenes of any of the characters. WE BETTER SEE GHOST THIS SEASON THOUGH!! Lol things are gonna be hella awkward when he finds out Dany is his aunt, yet we still root for them as a couple...that's wincest for you hurr hurr hurr hurr (sorry) I could see him living in the end cus tbh killing him again would be repetitive BS. 7.)Tywin Lannister - Kay...so he died on the sh*tter (imo probably the worst place to die) AND he was an absolute d*ck to Tyrion...but dude, he was awesome. He literally has a song about him in the world of GOT that is used as a warning to others to not f*ck with him!! He took a house that was laughed at and turned it into one of the most feared houses in all of Westeros. That is pretty frickin cool. 6.) Cersei Lannister - Another one I'll get flack for but whatever lol She's cool! So what she shags her brother and is an awful human being? She's a badass! Did you SEE how she blew up all of her enemies in the court and solidified her queen status in one fell swoop? That was dope!! She's vile but very entertaining to watch. RIP the Tyrells. Probably gonna get choked out though by her brother like Maggie the frog predicted. (By my second favorite character no less) 5.) Daenerys Targaryen - Dany! One of my cats is named after her! I love this character. The dragons are amazing, she's cute, she's powerful, maybe a little insane cus of Targaryen madness, and she's overcome some amazing odds. Her storylines could be a little meh in the grand scheme of things but Emilia Clarke's portrayal has made a character that we really root for. I suspect she'll die personally by the Night King buuuuut we'll see. 4.)Tyrion Lannister -Tyrion's writing has gone down a bit in recent seasons but still, most people's favorite Lannister. His quick wit and resilience make him a solidified favorite. Still seems like the person you'd most wanna drink with. I'd be pretty damn surprised if he bit the dust. 3.) Arya Stark - My other cat is named after her and there's a good reason why, SHE'S BASICALLY BECOME A FREAKING FACE STEALING NINJA!!! She was always likeable and I think I've enjoyed almost every storyline she's been a part of (excluding her main one last season) Maisie Williams is a great actress and I hope to see more of her in the future. I doubt Arya will die, but based on that one trailer, things do seem rather bleak for her. Who knows...maybe GRRM wants a divorce... 2.) Jaime Lannister - Yes. This dude is my favorite Lannister. In case you couldn't tell, Lannister is my favorite house. He's really had the best redemption arc in the series. He went from a character I disliked to my second favorite. I predict he will be the one to kill his sister, what happens to him after that, idk. It'll be awkward when he meets Bran again though... 1.) The Hound (Sandor Clegane) - CLEGANEBOWL BETTER HAPPEN!! Kay so... admittedly I screamed like a little freaking girl when this character came back. He... HE'S JUST SO FREAKING COOL!! Admittedly being a 6 footer and a rather grumpy individual, I probably relate to him more than I'd like to admit. Probably will die, but as long as he fights his brother, I'll be a very happy edgelord. Characters I dislike: 10.) Sansa Stark - Kay so I just...I dislike her, I never liked her. I feel sorry for her, sure. She's gotten better over time, sure. I still see her as very entitled and kinda whiny/bratty. She'll probably die. If not I won't be disappointed, still though, not a fan of Sansa. It was cool how she killed Ramsey, tho again, do wish the scene was gorier. 9.) Robb Stark - Ned Stark 2.0 but way less cool. Nuff said. I was okay with his death in the Red Wedding. Shouldn't have made a promise you weren't gonna commit to. Even if Walder Frey is a d*ck. 8.) Catelyn Stark - She was just such a jerk to Jon Snow and Tyrion, seriously. Even moreso in the books from what I have read of them. She got on my nerves. Honestly, I don't feel like Lady Stoneheart would've added much in terms of storyline. 7.) Brienne of Tarth: I find her annoying. Sure, her fight with the hound was FREAKING COOL, but she's kinda too self righteous for her own good. Duty is her thing and all but she is really not good at holding up to her vows. Still ship her and Tormund though. 6.) Theon Greyjoy - hated this dude, then felt sorry for him, now I roll my eyes at him. Honestly, Greyjoys other than Yara are pretty meh characters. Good for him finally regaining figurative cajones. Doubt he'll save his sister though, or survive the White Walkers for that matter. 5.) Euron Greyjoy - this one is a shame cus I hear the book character is amazing. Feels like a pretty generic bad guy of the week type for a show with outstanding villains. Funny like here or there, but kinda a weak character overall. Theon will probably kill him, though I'd love to see a twist where he kills Theon. 4.) Walder Frey - Old dude that got what was coming to him, props to the guy who plays Filch, portrayed two characters who were absolutely despicable. I doubt I really have to list the ways this cowardly character was despicable. Awesome death scene though. Winter came for House Frey. 3.) Shae - Grrrr. The actual actress I feel very sorry for cus I've heard her story, but man this character. Dumb but smart enough to screw over Tyrion. For personal reasons, I really hate this character, reminds me of people I've known. 2.) Tommen and Myrcella Baratheon - Most. Useless. Lannisters. Ever. I'm a Lannister fan so you could see why I roll my eyes so hard with these two. Tommen rolled over so hard you might as well have called him a wheel. And Myrcella was just kinda there, admittedly sad to watch her death scene though (pretty much moreso because it was the only time Jaime was really able to connect with his daughter) 1.) Joffrey Baratheon - Everyone probably saw this coming. Joffrey is that kid on the playground that'd hit you, you'd hit back, they'd start crying and get you in trouble. Everybody knew that kid, I think that's why everyone hates this character so. But man, his death scene was soooo satisfying. Props to the Jack Gleason for making him so horrible. There ya have it. My opinions on GOT characters. Freaking excited for tonight's premiere!! WINTER IS HERE!!

#Game of thrones #favorite #characters #Arya #the hound #Jon Snow #Daenerys #Cersei #Lannister #Jaime #Tyrion #Stark #Targaryen #Winterfell #Ramsey Bolton #Sansa #Robb

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bts-svt-mx · 6 years

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Maid For You (Part 2) Taehyung x Reader

Author: bts-svt-mx

Taehyung x Reader

Jungkook x Reader

Rating: Fluff, M, eventual smut if i get to it lol

Tags: Slow burn, Enemies to Lovers AU, Idol! Taehyung, Taehyung x Reader, Jungkook x Reader, Hoseok, mentions of other members

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 (M), 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Word Count: 2,000

Description: Wanting to get out of your parents house and experience what the world had to offer is way more expensive than people tell you it will be. So when your glamorous “manager to the stars” cousin Hoseok hooks you up with a job as the live-in maid for a hillside, massive mansion, you feel as though life might actually be looking up. That is until the mansion’s absentee high profile celebrity owner surprises you by moving back in leaving you to wonder if this mansion is big enough for you and his huge ego.

“Not that I’m not enjoying the show… but may I ask,” Kim Taehyung, Grammy winning world famous pop star, looks you up and down as his features twist into something more stern, angry even. “Who are you and what are you doing in my house?”

You were going to kill Hoseok.

Chapter 2:

They say to never meet your idols, and after today, you think you know why.

There you are, in front of one of your favorite singers in the whole world and all you can do is stand there looking like a cat caught with his hand in the fishbowl.

The utter look of displeasure plastered on his face made you feel uneasy. You can’t help but stare blankly at him taking in his rude tone of voice.

Is this real? Have the chemicals just gotten to your head? You thought you had read the labels and made sure they were safe but you probably should have opened up a window or- “Hello?” Snap, snap, snap. Kim Taehyung’s hand is now directly in front of your face snapping repeatedly. “What, are you suddenly mute now?” He scoffs moving out of your immediate personal space once again.

Curse your awkward staring. You always knew you had a bad habit of staring off into space. And today that space just happened to be occupied by your favorite idol in the world. “Y-you hired me.” It comes out kind of like a squeak but you speak up again, voice a little shaky from the surprise he just gave you. “I’m Y/N…” His face is still blank. Zero recognition going through his brain. “The live in maid...” You continue. Shouldn’t he know who he hired to take care of his home? Or at least know your name if he didn’t know your face? This whole situation is so awkward. You were in your pajamas still for goodness sake!

You blame stupid Hoseok.

Taehyung’s stare that once made your knees weak a year ago makes your stomach settle weirdly now that it’s actually directed towards you. He’s like a photograph come to life. A beautiful, rude picture. God, why did he have to open up his mouth and ruin it?

“I didn’t hire you.” Taehyung spits. “My manager did.” He leisurely walks around the room picking up random things and analyzing them. It’s odd. He looks as though he’s never seen this place before. He looks... out of place.

“Just like he does everything without my permission,” he mumbles, almost as an afterthought. Looking over to you, a slight smirk creeps over his once unreadable expression. “And where did he find you? Craigslist?”

Your jaw literally drops. How dare he ask you a question like that? You would think he’d be a little bit more considerate since you’re pretty much strangers. Obviously he doesn’t know his basic manners or how to be a decent person for that matter.

If there’s one thing you hate, it’s blatant rudeness. It’s like a light switch. 0 to 100. Your blood begins to boil.

It’s official, you’re pissed.

Well this is definitely not what you always imagined meeting him would be like. More like you imagined you’d run into him on the side of the street, him knocking you over. And he’d catch you before falling to the ground, look into your eyes and- well.. that fantasy popped like a pink bubblegum bubble stretched too far. The initial shock and excitement of coming face to face with your favorite idol had subsided and now you were just angry at his disrespect and quite frankly, kind of offended for Hoseok’s sake too.

He’s back on the other side of the kitchen, analyzing a red and olive colored ceramic rooster and for a moment, you think you see a look of relief and soft eyes before he picks up a similar ceramic frog next to it and cringes at it’s ugly yellow/green color. There he is, looking so nonchalant, not even caring how blunt he is being in the moment. Not even caring how his words might hurt you.

Standing up straighter you find your voice again. You don’t care who he is. You weren’t going to take this disrespect from him. “Your house would have looked like the Haunted Mansion by now if it wasn’t for me cleaning this massive place while you were out for months wasting money and partying it up in a different country every day.”

His gaze quickly snaps back to you, surprise reflecting in his face from your more than un-lady like tone of voice. What? So he can talk to you like you’re nothing but you can’t do the same back to him?

“And Hoseok’s a good man,” you continue. “He works his ass off to make sure you’re happy every day which I’m sure can’t be an easy job.”

It’s true. Hoseok can’t really talk about his clients but he does tell you about how exhausted they make him. Hoseok never really lets it get to him though and you know he bounces back quickly, but still. No one disrespects your family like that.

“So who are you to blame him for hiring a damn housekeeper for you while you’re away?” you sputter out quickly. Woah Y/N. Where did all of this aggression come from? He had only really said 3 or 4 things to you. Granted, every one of those things was something insulting. Your confidence began to falter again. His hard gaze on you was making you self conscious. Tearing your eyes away from his for the first time, you look down and toy with the hem of your Mickey Mouse pajama shirt.

Wait, no. Look up again Y/N, you can’t give him the feeling he’s winning here.

“And who are you to make me feel like I’m the one intruding here?” You add, trying to fake more confidence. Voice raising to a yell. “You know nothing about me or this house. You look like you’ve never even seen this place before!”

Your own words hit your ears with a boom as they bounce off of the marble walls. Shit.. that was probably too far. Ugh. Why can’t you ever keep your mouth shut? You were so going to be fired after this. Goodbye to the freedom of the city, hello Mom and Dad’s house. Again.

Using both of his hands to push himself off of the edge of the countertop he’s leaning on, he scoffs. Expression once again unreadable. A closed book with no title.

“Of course I know you,” He speaks, eyes narrowing.

Slowly, he makes his way over to the refrigerator where you stand. You don’t know how, but he’s clearly taken back the control in this conversation.

Suddenly you feel small again. Obviously he isn’t used to being questioned and you just had to go ahead and run your mouth.

“You’re just another fangirl desperately pulling any strings she can to get close to me.” He explains laughing slightly, but devoid of any real humor. It’s at this point you realize how tall and broad he is. Towering over you in the physical sense and also in the metaphorical sense. Closer and closer he walks. Suffocating you like a snake coiling around its prey.

His lips curl into a condescending smirk as he places his hand flat against the freezer door effectively trapping you in. “What? Do you actually believe in your insane, obsessed mind that you would have a chance with me if you got close to me?” His eyes scan your face, assessing just how much his words are affecting you. There’s hatred in his voice. Though for you or for himself, you’re not quite sure.

His face is so close. You could feel his breath on your cheek. Surprisingly very minty with a hint of jasmine, you think. And his cologne… Not too overwhelming but definitely distinct enough where you were certain you’d be able to pick it out anywhere from now on. It melted through the air, wrapping around you slowly until it was all that you could focus on.

Woah... it was really messing with your brain.

His other hand reaches out to move a strand of your hair that had fallen out of your bun while dancing just a few moments ago. Effectively ripping you out of your former lifestyle being the pseudo owner of this huge mansion and thrusting you into your reality of being a full time maid.

Because really, that was all you were.

Sure, you had your fun living in this house by yourself with all the freedom in the world at your fingertips. But did you expect it to last forever?

You don’t want it to, but your heart chooses this moment to start beating like it’s about to pop out of your chest. The look he’s giving you right now.. you know it well. And you’re sure it’s the one he uses to get any girl he wants, whenever he wants.

The only thing connecting the two of you physically is his fingers threaded around the strand of your hair. You might as well have been fully pressed against each other with the amount of heat you feel creeping up inside of you. And though you don’t really want to admit it, you have to physically restrain yourself from pushing yourself into him by gripping firmly onto the refrigerator door handle behind you.

“Well, you are quite pretty,” You didn’t know it was possible but his voice drops to an even lower octave. Vibrating through your chest as he speaks.

He’s considering his next words carefully. Gaze following the lines of your face. Eyes meeting eyes, moving across the map of your face to your nose, your reddened cheeks, then finally landing on your lips.

“Maybe if you don’t turn out to be a complete psycho I might actually fuck you.” His eyes dark, smirk still plastered on his face. “You know, to get you out of my way and save us both some time.”

What you thought was your heart about to burst out of your chest turned out to be a fit of laughter causing Taehyung to recoil quickly, pulling his hands from the side of your head and away from your hair out of surprise. His face contorting into something of a mix between confusion and disgust as you cackled in his face. You almost couldn’t get your next sentence out as you doubled over laughing.

“See...” More laughing. Any feelings of lust caused by his entrancing scent now replaced with amusement in an instant. “That’s where you’re wrong,” Even more laughing. Wow, it’s been a while since you laughed this much.

“I could give less of a fuck about who you are.” You say mocking his vulgar word choice. A few more giggles leaving your lips. Okay, it was a lie. You’ll admit that. The you of last year would have been freaking out about who was in front of the present day you right now. But the situation you were in is just so ironic! You had dreamed about meeting Taehyung for a couple of years now and now that it has actually happened, it’s so completely the opposite of what you had always played out in your head that it was almost… well, yeah actually it was just hilarious.

Who would've thought the world’s sweetheart would be such a complete and total douchebag?

“Hoseok didn’t even tell me who owned this place.” You tried to catch your breath as the giggles finally subsided. “I just needed easy money and a place to sleep. Hell, I don’t even know what you do for a living!” Okay, that’s another lie but honestly, who really cares at this point. Clearly the respect and love for him you had before was just of the image he portrayed to the media.

That was not the man standing in front of you right now. And it made you more than a little angry. What’s a little white lie at this point when he’s been lying to the whole world for who knows how long?

“Now if you’ll excuse me,” You push yourself away from in front of the refrigerator putting the mop in the small cleaning supply closet a few steps away. Taehyung hasn’t moved an inch. Now it’s his turn to be speechless. “I have a job to continue doing seeing as I’m the main person making sure your house doesn’t end up looking like an abandoned dump with all the dust the piling up from no one EVER USING ANYTHING HERE,” You practically scream the last part in his direction, words reverberating off the walls once again as you turn swiftly on your heel to head rather quickly to your room on the West side of the mansion.

You had a phone call to make.

<-- Previous Chapter | Next Chapter -->

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librabinight-blog · 5 years

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Hiring a Therapist is Like Hiring a Math Tutor

Dear friendbugs, I know it sounds oversimplified but putting my therapist search in this frame has helped me become a better advocate for myself. Let me explain...

I’ve been battling depression at varying levels for roughly 10 years now. Hi! Nice to meet you. 👋🏻 lol Honestly it’s not something I’m proud of but I’m also not ashamed to say it. Mental health is stigmatized enough by society without its sufferers getting down on themselves. You wouldn’t judge someone for having the flu, so why judge an equally uncontrollable diagnosis? I could do a whole separate post on that, but let’s stay focused. 🤨 The fact is that therapy is something ANYONE could benefit from and I’m a firm believer that everyone should try it once.

The problem is that finding a therapist when you really need one is exhausting and difficult and stressful and all those other fun adjectives you want when you’re already feeling enough anxiety and/or depression to need help in the first place. It would be like telling someone who broke their arm that to get a cast they have to do push-ups first. Like bro, if I could do the push-ups, I wouldn’t need the cast! 🙄 Just a few things I personally had trouble finding in my therapist search were as follows:

- Someone with evening or weekend hours since I work full-time

- Someone who took my insurance or offered affordable sliding scale options

- Someone who was taking new patients

- Someone who specialized or had experience treating depression

- Someone within driving distance of my home

- Someone who even called or emailed me back

It’s not easy. It’s not fast. It’s not fun. I don’t speak for everyone of course, but for me it felt as though I was begging for help and no one was listening. We tell people not to commit suicide but we make it nearly impossible for them to get assistance to prevent it. Even crisis hotlines are overburdened but, again, we’re getting off topic. On top of how hard it was to find someone, I didn’t know if I even deserved the help in the first place. It’s part of my illness to have low self-worth. As a result, I was asking permission to be treated rather than demanding what I needed.

Fast-forward through 1 in-patient stint, 1 out-patient stint, 5 private therapists and 1 therapy app and here I am now finally understanding the problem. You see I had a couple of good therapists in my life but overwhelmingly they’ve been disappointing. I had one therapist that took appointments in her home and was late to our sessions every time because she would do her grocery shopping right before. There’s a special awkwardness in sitting outside your therapist’s house waiting for her to come home.😅 Then I had one who would spend our sessions frequently checking her phone or showing me 10-minute YouTube videos. Were they relevant? Sure. But maybe I could have just gotten the link from her for later rather than paying her hourly rate for a free video. 💸 Then I had the therapist that spoke from minute one all the way through to the end. I used to count how many words I could actually get in during the hour with him and never got above 20. Even one of the two good therapists I had would almost always cut our sessions short because she overbooked all the time. I never got my time made up for any of this stuff. Therapist after therapist came and went and often I felt worse and more depressed than when I came in. Like I said earlier, though, I didn’t think I deserved better. I thought I was lucky these people were even listening to me in the first place.

The final straw for me was the therapy app. The subscription promised 2 check-ins (text messages) each day Monday-Friday from a licensed professional in my state. You had a chatroom in the app with your therapist and you were free to send whatever messages whenever you wanted. Feeling anxious? No need to wait til your session to vent. You just send everything you’re thinking in the moment to your person. The theory was that the therapist would spend roughly 10 minutes a day reading and responding to you during the 2 check-ins. That would amount to 50 minutes by the end of the week which is like having a full in-person session. I liked the concept and I’ll admit that I did find some help...until the check-ins stopped coming. First it was a day here or there where she only checked in once instead of twice. Then it was a day of no check-in at all. Then it was two days in a row with no word.😕 I didn’t want to push her because I thought “This person is busy. This person is trying. What right do you have to be so demanding?” Well the fact is that I had every right. Eventually I confronted her but I was also very aware of how attached I’d gotten to this new support, so I didn’t blame her directly. I told her I understood she was busy but maybe she just needed someone less needy as a client. Looking back on it, I was being a pushover. I told her I knew I was asking quite a lot (by asking for what I paid for) and I was being difficult (for again, asking for what I paid for) but perhaps she could check-in more. She told me she completely agreed that she needed to check-in more and that it looked like we both had some work to do. Well, bugs, I bought it. I told her that I’d love to keep working.... and then the next day she didn’t check in. So I quit.

Me quitting came after the realization that she was right. I had A LOT of work to do but the thing I needed to address first was the way I looked for help. This is where the metaphor comes in, bugs! How is a therapist like a tutor? Every tutor knows the same fact and formulas, but the way they teach them varies. Therapists are similar in that way. You might see a therapist who is more dynamic and engaging or one who more reserved, “just hear to listen” style. They could both be treating the same problem just in different ways. Additionally, tutors are going to push you. They’ll assign you homework and force you to practice skills you might prefer to just avoid. Therapists are no different. A good therapist will push you past what you thought your own limits were because that’s how you grow. The most important piece of my metaphor though (and the point of all this) is that both therapists and tutors are people you hired. They work for you. You don’t owe them anything beyond their fee (and maybe some respect as a fellow human). If your tutor was late every time, you’d fire them. If your tutor spoke to you in a way you didn’t like, you wouldn’t go back. If your tutor only used verbal explanations when you’re a visual learner, why waste your money?🤷🏻‍♀️

After I put things into that frame, I realized how ridiculous I was to have ever put up with the treatment I’d had. 🤔 The truth is that it’s so hard to find a therapist in the first place, we sometimes settle for any help we can get. I know I did. Now that I’m advocating for myself, I feel like a stronger more worthwhile person. It won’t be easy to find someone new and it’s especially not easy to leave someone old even if they’re no good for you. You have to do it, though. Talk to your therapist and see if they can change the things you don’t like (a good therapist will work WITH you) but if they don’t respect your needs, you have to respect them enough for both of you. Never forget that like a tutor, your therapist needs to earn your business. You’re paying for a service. Get your money’s worth, bugs. 😘

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atopearth · 6 years

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OZMAFIA!! Part 8 - Robin Hood Route

I love Fuka’s curiosity LOL. When she commented on Robin’s beak (his mask) and then asking him if he can fly (since she thinks he’s similar to a crow) LOLL. Gahh, when they’re talking about people hurling themselves to their death off cliffs and hitting into rocks…. Painful death omg.. I have to agree with Robin that the living are much scarier than the dead though.

But I see now! Bercy is the only man in the all women Boots Famiglia Pashet is the leader of because his family has always served her. Honestly, it was because of him that I didn’t realise their famiglia was full of women hahaha. Sounds about right that Robin is more important than Caramia and them. He’s the only doctor in town so I’m sure all the mafia are very reliant on him, especially if they get hurt or sick, you can say their lives are in his hands so he’s definitely very important Fuka! XD I never thought that Robin would have a wife! And beautiful enough to win the beauty pageant too! She must have been a ray of sunshine considering how he talks about her haha. Maybe she’s similar to Fuka~

Wowwwww! Robin is such a hottie!!!😍😍 That short blond hair that glistens in the light, it looks so soft and nice~ he looks so stylish and good!🤗 LMAO that Fuka thought Robin was carrying his severed head when he was trying to show her that the beak thing was a mask hahahaha. When Robin started talking about how initially being a doctor, it was quite pressuring with all the responsibility and expectations that he can’t fail since he can apparently cure anything, but as time went on and the more experience he accumulated, the more disconnected he felt towards them being…human I guess. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll become like that too.

I’ve never seen Gretel afraid of anyone so it’s nice to see that Robin can scare her off haha. I hope he wasn’t serious when he said he’d lock her up in a quiet place to protect her since she’s always so reckless… I agree with Caramia! Robin is so handsome, it’s such a waste to be wearing that mask all the time! Although I’m so used to the mask now that it’s hard to associate the two being the same person! Loll!

I have to agree that it’s pretty rude of Fuka to be asking everyone around about Robin’s wife when he was obviously agitated about talking about it. Like, asking Caramia and them is fine but asking Pashet and anyone else would be quite rude. I’m glad she was upfront and honest about it by apologising to him directly for snooping around though! I wish I could get a job as easily as Fuka did hahaha! Nice of Robin to hire her to clean up and count stock etc, at least she’s not cooking haha!

Fuka’s curiosity is probably the good and bad thing about her. Now that she’s probably seen Robin’s wife encased or preserved in the back room, what is she going to do now… That’s a difficult thing to unsee after all… Can’t blame Robin for being so mad about her going in.. I agree with Kyrie though, she should keep apologising to Robin until he forgives her or even if he doesn’t forgive her. It was a major invasion of privacy considering he’s told her many times to not go there. How terrible.. It must have been so difficult for Robin to experience that. A wedding day with a beautiful wife, it was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives and yet a bullet to her gut destroyed everything… He saved her life but in a sense, he’s incapable of treating her and so tries his best to keep her sleeping and cared for, hoping to one day be able to cure her… Will she die…?

Ummmm!! Did Robin just somehow get into her room, get her to confess her feelings, reciprocate it and give her some drug to let loose or something and then slept with her?! That sounds super dodgy even though I like him lollll. But I guess he did it because he wants revenge on Hamelin and is going to risk his life to do this? Ooh and to use her to steal a gun from the Oz famiglia. Lucky she stopped him and told him that he should be focusing on curing his wife rather than revenge.

The only saddening thing is that I guess, his wife is dead. All he was doing was forcefully extending her life, since she can’t live outside of that machine. In the end, he’d still have to give up on her life. And he did. At least the wife got to say her last words to him and now Fuka and Robin can take care of the clinic together as a true couple~ I guess it’s just surprising that this was Hamelin’s crime. I wonder why he did it, considering from Scarlet’s route, he was a nice guy and everything..

(Ending 2) Btw I find it so cute that when Fuka started being his assistant, Axel, Caramia, Kyrie and Pashet went to check up on how she’s doing! That’s like such a nice and simple gesture! Especially for Axel! Hahaha, he warms up to her quite fast as usual. Why does Kyrie feel guilt towards Robin…? What did he do? Did he somehow cause that incident to happen? I love the little chats Robin has with his wife every night. She can’t reply but it’s nice of him to treat everything as normal and tell her about everything going on in his life. Even more adorable is the fact that he studied cooking and is so good at it now because of her!

Robin plans to use some sort of forbidden magic of rebirth to save his wife? He’ll let her die and risk it to use this? Fortunately that book to teach him how to do it got burnt tbh! Sounds dodgy! But it was his only hope so I guess you can’t help but feel sorry for Robin.. considering that the mafia cause more trouble rather than protection of regular citizens, I can understand why Robin doesn’t respect the fact that they get to hold a meeting to decide Hamelin’s fate without any consideration for him or the other citizens that live in this town. It’s not like he chose these mafia to represent or protect the town, he never had a choice and yet he is forced to swallow that Hamelin’s roaming around like he did nothing wrong..

I never realised why it was important for Robin to drug Fuka, but I see now that it was because her cottage was next to the weapon storage house so she’d hear if he went there. It is pretty cruel to use her feelings like that tbh and to sleep with her only to achieve his objectives.. Oh.. It was Scarlet who shot Hamelin and stopped him from his rampage I guess… But to think that Robin actually had to treat Hamelin’s wounds right after he shot his wife…. That must have been truly difficult… Considering how lawless this town is, I’m really sad that Robin has to be treated like this, locked in the same prison as Hamelin.. it’s just eugh. I can’t tell whether Caramia’s decision back then was right or wrong when he prioritised protecting his territory and handling Hamelin instead of getting someone to help Robin carry his injured wife to the clinic asap. But, right or wrong, she’s dead now.. I mean, he’d probably need people to escort them back and I guess it would have been difficult to deploy if he needed the people, but this would have been hard for Robin to stomach for sure.

Well, as expected, the rules are pretty flexible huh! Since Robin got to get out of prison because he’s their only doctor and they couldn’t find anyone else willing to stay with this job lol. So I guess it’s still kinda a happy ending for the second one lol? Considering his obsession and love for all these years, I’d say the second “bad” ending is more realistic of what I think I or Robin would have done. There are just some things you can’t forgive and prevent yourself from doing and I’d say revenge is one of them. It takes a lot of courage to actually give it up tbh since it’ll feel like you’re failing the person that got hurt… Oh well! Robin’s route was okay, good for finally knowing what Hamelin did and why he got exiled, and Robin has a nice personality I guess, but the romance is rather forced in the first happy kinda ending so I prefer the other one. I guess more than a romance route, it served to explain some things in town a bit more~

#ozmafia

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