“the scent of blood or the scent of gold, they smell the same in the end.”

Robert's Rebellion Histories and Lore Supercut: from the Tourney of Harrenhal through the Siege of Pyke

Ran across a list of "Lannister crimes" on reddit and I thought I was prepared for this.

Cersei aborting Roberts child

Wasn't prepared in the slightest.

Apparently enforcing bodily autonomy is a crime now.

So I'm forcing my mum to watch game of thrones (she totally loves it) and we just finished the ep where Catelyn takes Tyrion and my mum turned to me and said, verbatim, "What a fucking dumb bitch, she's just started a war. You told me about Tywin Lannister being ruthless, that he won't let any slight against his family stand no matter how much he hates Tyrion. Aren't Catelyn's kids and hubby in Kings Landing???? And Cersei is Tywin's daughter, won't she kill Ned, Sansa, and Arya?"

Mum thinks Catelyn started the War of the Five Kings and she's dumb lol so it must be right (it is).

jaime lannister should’ve been the one to kill the night king i said what i said. he should be a kingslayer twice over. even better if he sacrificed himself or risked his life to protect bran, boom redemption arc comes full circle

I find Jaime is as much if not more responsible than Cersei for this whole “Lannister coup” thing. 

Now you might say, but Cersei is the one who had bastards and murdered the king, so why does Jaime end up more responsible than her?

What choice did Cersei have? She either has kids with Robert, has kids with someone else, or gets dismissed as queen and married to someone else where the process repeats itself (although this second man might not be able to divorce her as her father is likely his liege lord. Might not will.)

While the path that leads to the least obvious death in canon is #3, I also imagine that Tywin would be nothing short of furious and we might end up with Stannis as the heir instead. I’m not sure Cersei thought of that as an option. Cersei misses quite a lot of things and keeps making the worst possible decisions, so this might just be a extension of her character.

And I’m not here to tell a woman that she has to have the children of a man. Any man, but particularly one who is raping and abusing her. Everyone is very sad when she kills Robert. I say, good for Cersei. 

Jaime, though, what was Jaime’s excuse? What was going to happen to Jaime if he didn’t sleep with Cersei? She’d get mad? And what was going to happen to Jaime if his sister didn’t have children? She’d either be mad at him in Kings Landing or mad at him in some lord’s castle in the Westerlands. He wants to make a lot of noise about “honoring my vows” while upholding the Lannister regime.  

I say they both did it, and they’re both still doing it.

Game of Thrones Broadway Stage Play Spinoff in Development: Tourney at Harrenhal / Robert's Rebellion

The monthly roundup for March. The March of the Minis. I got a TON done this month, probably at the cost of a bunch of other stuff. Also managed to wrap up two separate box sets this month, and another waits in the wings....

12 Sworn Brothers (ASOIAF) 1 Watch Captain (ASOIAF) 1 Jon Snow (ASOIAF) 1 Ghost (ASOIAF) 8 Zombies (Zombicide) 1 Survivor Wanda (Zombicide) 1 Abomination (Zombicide) 3 Canoptek Scarab Swarms (WH40k) 1 Canoptek Reanimator (WH40k) 1 Custom Catacomb Command Barge (WH40k) 3 Eradicators (WH40k) 1 Indomitus Chaplain (WH40k) 1 Sentinel Enforcer (ASOIAF) 1 Champion of the Faith (ASOIAF) 1 Assault Veteran (ASOIAF) 1 Turncoat (ASOIAF) 1 Clegane Butcher (ASOIAF) Also picked up the Pariah Nexus box, and that’s given some very tidy new minis to paint up. Painted: 39         Pending: 12            Played: 0               Totals:   109                       71                         0

Only a cat of a different coat,

That's all the truth I know.

The Lannister Attachments.

“When I saw my father’s host deploy, I remember thinking how beautiful it was. Like a flower opening it’s petals to the sun. A crimson rose, with iron thorns.” - Tyrion Lannister

The first wave of Lannister attachments. The Sentinel Enforcer, Guard Captain, Turncoat, Assault Veteran, Clegane Butcher and Champion of the Faith.

*She had vouched for Ser Jaime. The long night was coming. Lady Sansa, Lord Snow and the Queen he had deferred to trusted him. They celebrated their that feast. As it may very well be their last for most of them. For they would become Nightwalkers tomorrow. Perhaps all of them. They believed to enjoy their last night as humans. At least that was the way many men thought of it.

However Brienne had just been knighted by Ser Jaime. It was an honor for her in many ways. Brienne was the first female knight in all of Westeros. As well as in command of of her battalion of the army tomorrow. Of which Ser Jaime would be a part of.

Yes of course Tormond was watching and hoping that he and Brienne would pair off and have as he so well put it "Have beautiful babies together." however she continued to talk through the evening with Ser Jaime Lannister.

Lionheart

HELLO BEAUTIES. I have a pre-ASOIAF mini-fic for you here, featuring everyone’s favorite terrible family, the Lannisters. This is a sweet little scene I imagined between Cersei and her mother, which I intend to be part of a longer series surrounding Joanna’s relationship with the twins. 

If you enjoy it, please feel free to let me know in the comments or in my inbox! I always welcome feedback. Sending you loads of love wherever you are, and thank you for reading, 

Word count: 666 (cursed but we love it).

Cersei’s hair is long and tangled as a fisherman’s net by the time Septa Dorret finds them in the upper bailey, two small golden-haired soldiers playing at swords. Both are clothed in dirt-dusted tunics and breeches, weapons in hand, the wood of the practice blades thumping dully every time one of them lands a hit on the other. The guards only shrug when the old septa scolds them all like little boys—what in the gods’ names do they think they are doing, letting Lord Tywin’s children have at each other as if they were knights preparing for war? She seems likely to cuff each man on his ear when Jaime suddenly cries out, and the children’s fun is ended.

Septa Dorret is on them in a blink, prying the wooden hilt from Cersei’s fingers, hauling her back to the castle, Cersei squirming and kicking and shouting all the way, though in vain. 

The septa is tough as old boots, and she has served House Lannister far too long to be daunted by their pride or wealth or status. What should she fear from a child? Cersei may well bear her father’s name, but at six she is no lion. She is a little girl like any other, and little girls must learn to behave..

It is not long before the commotion reaches her mother’s ears, and Lady Joanna arrives at Cersei’s chamber door just as Cersei is refusing, quite loudly, to have her hair combed. “Thank you, Septa,” Joanna says gently, “We can manage from here.”

“My lady.” The old woman sighs, relieved. She leaves without another word. When they are alone, Joanna eyes her daughter evenly, patiently, silently. Cersei is slow to settle, but in time her sobs become fewer and softer until all that remains are a few ragged little gasps. 

“Are you going to tell Father?” She sniffs, her cheeks salted with tears.

“No,” Joanna raises an eyebrow, “Though I imagine he shall find out anyway, if you arrive at supper in such a state. Will you let me help you?”

Cersei chews her lip, considering. Her hair is a nest of tangles, her hands and forehead streaked with mud, and a blue-black bruise is darkening above her elbow where Jaime walloped her with his practice sword. Certainly Father will notice, and when he does....perhaps it’s best not to think of it. She wipes her nose with the sleeve of her tunic. Then she nods her resignation.

“It’s not fair,” she says, plopping glumly into the little tufted stool before her looking glass. “No one ever scolds Jaime.”

Never mind that they play all the same games and run through the same thunderstorms and hide in the same gardens. Jaime is allowed to be as wild and filthy as he pleases. Cersei is only allowed to follow other people’s stupid rules.

“You are your father’s firstborn,” her mother is fond of reminding her. “You must learn to behave like—“

“A lady,” Cersei sighs, “I know.”

“A Lannister,” Joanna corrects. She lifts a handful of curls and pulls a pearl-handled comb through in long, gentle strokes until Cersei’s hair is smooth as a weaver’s warp, each strand a shining golden thread.

“I’m the firstborn, but Jaime still gets the Rock.”

“Someday, yes. But by then you will have the kingdom.” Joanna looks at her in the mirror, green eyes on green eyes. “And you will be the most powerful Lannister that has ever lived.”

“More powerful than Jaime?” Cersei can hardly believe it. She turns fully around in her seat, tucking her feet beneath her to feel taller.

“Mhm.”

“More than Father, even?”

“Yes,” Joanna laughs. Cersei will remember her mother’s laugh for the rest of her days, a sound that bubbles like seafoam over sand. “Though you had better not tell him so. Sit down now, and let me finish. You look a fright.”

“Good,” says Cersei, a jester’s grin between her ears. “Father says it’s best when they’re afraid of you.”

Has anyone found any fics where Sansa’s direwolf Lady lives?

I only know of one,  The Mad Kings

AGAINST THE STARS ⎿ JAIME LANNISTER ⏋ - i (on Wattpad) https://www.wattpad.com/1045837928-against-the-stars-%E2%8E%BF-jaime-lannister-%E2%8F%8B-i?utm_source=web&utm_medium=tumblr&utm_content=share_reading&wp_uname=dhanakp&wp_originator=%2F8aZTu7Gg8GxFMF%2F1cL730qX%2BuEe018TmYMcGGdzuuJY02XorQEr61N4QnzVxckizH7MkS1DpKZ2r4kt0hhlZNd%2FHdjyAoK4N%2B5AvdycktkNPBCa251%2B10JNHGwZkxmV ❝When the precious rose tried of being PAWN ,so she turn the table and became QUEEN.❞ IN WHICH LANNISTER AND TYRELL HAVE MUCH MORE HISTORY THAN WE KNOW A star crossed lover made a mistake and it caused her family their downfall. After lived with guilt for all her life, Maryanne was now coming to pay her debts. [ Jaime Lannister x OC ] [ Game of Thrones AU ]

Medieval styled leather journal with heraldic lion on the front and back cover...

jaime lannister, in his blue

lannfam - saoirse ronan, incest-child, tyrone, jamm + brioche

imagine. you get one shot at life and you’re born a lannister of casterly rock.

not to be rude but disliking Jaime Lannister is ableist :(

Medieval styled leather journal with gilded lion. 8" x 10" large, 3" thick, 600 pages of heavy weight paper, brass accessories, etc.