#and desperately wanting connection and to Be Known and Understood

[wholoveseggs]

girrrllll, i got another idea! how about Elijah proposing to a reader? it could be angsty in the beginning, maybe they got into a fight because she feels like he always puts his family before her, so he proposes to her to show her she is his family too (and cause he was planning on doing that for a while anyway). and it’s all emotional, she’s not believing what’s happening and she’s thinking he doesn’t really mean it. meanwhile he’s almost desperate to show her how much she means to him. Smut cannot be absent of course. thank youuuu🫶🏻🫶🏻

Forever

18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}

Elijah loves you with all his heart, but his commitment to his family and his loyalty to Klaus keeps him from acting on his feelings. But when he almost loses you, he is determined to prove that you are the only woman he has ever truly loved, and wants to make you his, forever.

♡♡ Thanks for the request @msveronicag! Who doesn't want to be Elijah's wife? ♡♡

6.8k words - Warnings: smut, fluff, angst, slight violence (a classic Elijah & Klaus brawl), shower sex, rimjob {f!receiving}, oral sex & the Italian coast ♡

Everyone says that Elijah Mikaelson is the best of his family. A loyal, charming, considerate man that holds himself to a standard not many can accomplish. In essence, perfect. He loves his family deeply, despite their constant misgivings and betrayals. Nothing would get in his way, if it meant he could protect the ones he loves.

Well, that's what you wanted to believe.

There was a reason Elijah held such devotion to his family. He was one of them, and no better than the worst of them, having sinned over and over to the point where atonement was simply not a viable option.

He didn't want you to see him that way, the dark side of his polished exterior. He wanted to shed his past and become a new man with you by his side.

You were unlike anyone he's ever known or had a passing connection to. Your empathy and kindness was beyond measure, it had captivated him the very moment that your eyes met.

He always wanted to be married, there were even a few times he almost found someone to spend eternity with. Something always stood between that moment and himself, usually in the shape of some great threat. But things had now settled in his life, he had a niece and a proper place to call home. He was no longer on the run from one demon or another.

He wanted this. To settle down with the woman of his dreams, build a life together, and maybe even add to it.

Perfect. Simple. Domestic bliss.

You had come for a small party celebrating Hope's third birthday. Or, as far as you were concerned, a get together amongst those you considered family.

Although, sometimes you worried they didn't see you as family in turn. Deep entrenched history often kept you away from the inner workings of their family life. You understood that you had to earn your place in their lives, and you had done so time and time again. But they never seemed to truly accept you as one of their own.

You got along with nearly all of them except Klaus, who saw you as just a passing phase Elijah was going through. A dalliance, nothing more.

He certainly knew how to poke at your insecurities about your relationship.

"So, tell me," he asked as the two of you waited in the kitchen. "When will this little thing with you and my brother end?"

"Excuse me?" you asked, trying to keep your voice light.

"Don't take it personally, sweetheart. You're not the first pretty face he's lost himself in," Klaus explained with a shrug.

"You don't think he's serious about me?" you questioned, trying not to feel hurt.

Klaus just shrugged and gave you a wicked grin. "Why would he be?"

"Because I love him, and he loves me," you replied, keeping your voice low. "It's been four years, and it's serious."

Klaus let out a bark of a laugh. "Four years is nothing in the life of an original. When will you stop living in this fantasy you've built in your mind? This will end and you will move on."

You were about to respond with a few choice words when Hayley came in carrying hope.

While your relationship with Klaus was contentious and you thought him to be cruel and cold. There was no doubt that Hope loved her daddy with all of her tiny heart. She reached out to him, and he happily took her into his arms.

"There's my little one," he cooed, holding her close. "I love you, my sweet girl."

He began to place kisses all over her, and the three year old giggled loudly.

You had baked the cake for her, and placed a number 3 candle in the middle.

"Let's light her up!" you announced.

The cake was placed on the dining room table, and Elijah stood by you. He slipped his hand in yours and squeezed.

"I want auntie y/n to light it," Hope said.

You smiled wide and kissed her on the head.

"Okay," you whispered, your voice soft.

You lit the candle, and everyone began to sing as the little Mikaelson happily ate a slice of cake, messily covering herself. You laughed, taking a cloth to wipe her little face and hands. Elijah watched you with adoring eyes, you were such a loving soul and he was so lucky to be the one to call you his own.

The cake was enjoyed by all and soon it was time for gifts. Hope was handed a large package by her father, and she eagerly tore open the paper.

You were cuddled up to Elijah, and he pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head. "Thank you, my love."

"For what?" you asked, glancing up at him.

"For being here. It means a lot to me," he told you.

You looked back up at Elijah, and kissed him lightly.

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere else," you told him.

Hayley helped Hope unwrap the gift from you and Elijah. It was a wooden dollhouse, and it was a miniature replica of the compound, complete with a little Klaus, Elijah, Hayley, and Hope.

Hope hugged the dollhouse to her chest. "I love it!"

"We made it ourselves," you said with a smile.

"Look, daddy!" Hope squealed. "Auntie Y/N and Uncle 'lijah got me a house."

Klaus gave you a tight smile, and you looked at Elijah. He wrapped an arm around your waist, and held you close. This only seemed to annoy Klaus more, but he turned his attention to his daughter, and the gift that she had received.

"That's amazing, little love. Now, why don't you open the rest of your presents?"

"Okay!"

The evening winded down, and eventually Klaus and Hayley took Hope upstairs to get her ready for bed and the rest of the family retired to their rooms. You had left the dining room table a mess, and wanted to help clean up.

You had picked up a few discarded wrapping papers, when Elijah's arms came around your waist.

"Don't worry about that, my love," he whispered, pressing his lips to your neck. "Leave it, we can do it tomorrow."

"You're sure?" you asked, leaning against him.

"Very," he whispered, taking your hand and leading you towards his bedroom. "I have other plans for you."

"Oh?"

"Mmm," he replied, nipping at your ear. "You know, I've been thinking of you all day. All the things I'd like to do with you."

You flushed,  biting your lips and smiling shyly. He never failed to make your heart skip a beat when he looked at you with that seductive gaze. He never had to force it either, his stare was simply alluring and attentive, it pulled you into its grasp like a siren's song.

Elijah shut the door, and the moment you turned around, he grabbed you and kissed you passionately. His hands held your hips tightly, pulling you against him. He kissed down your jawline, and down your throat.

He pushed you gently onto the bed, kissing down your neck and inhaling the smell of your skin, pulling your clothes off as he went along.

His love, his entire world, right here in his arms. If he were a more possessive man, he'd keep you in this room until his love was imprinted in your very bones.

He kissed you softly, wanting to take his time and express how deeply he cared for you with each touch. He moved down your body, worshiping your skin with his hands and mouth, and the soft sounds that escaped you only urged him on.

His bliss was quickly broken by the sounds of his brother yelling for him at the top of his lungs- an unnecessary use of volume, considering everyone had supernatural hearing.

You reached down and cupped his face, drawing his attention back to you.

"Please don't," you whispered, a pleading look in your eyes. "Stay,"

Elijah's breath left his lungs. You were not the clingy type, in fact you were rather understanding and independent; letting him go and do whatever it was the family needed, always supporting him.

He should stay, finish what he started with you, love you, the one he can't live without. But there was clearly something going on downstairs, his family needed him.

He pressed a soft kiss to your lips. "I'll be back."

"Sure," you said flatly, pulling away. You didn't quite meet his eyes as you turned on your side, facing away from him.

You were clearly upset, but he didn't have time to be swayed by his emotions. He leaned in to give you a quick kiss, but you turned your head away.

"I'm sorry, my love," he said, stroking your hair.

You didn't respond, and he had to leave you there, curled up and angry. He felt a deep pang of regret, but the thought of his family's safety was at the forefront of his mind.

As soon as Elijah left, you let your emotions come to a boil. It hurt how he was constantly running away to deal with his family. It hurt you when he put them over you, their arguments over little things always dragged him in. It made you feel undesired, and second best.

You had no doubt he cared for you, and you did believe he loved you. But did he truly love you the way he loved his own family?

No, not really. He was always holding back, never showing all of himself. He wanted a relationship, but not a true partnership. Not with you, anyway.

Your insecurities bubbled to the surface. The way Klaus acted around you, like you didn't belong, he always treated you as if you were an outsider. Perhaps he was right, that it was a fantasy, that you should move on.

It didn't matter that you were with Elijah. It didn't matter that he called you his love.

He could love you, but not be in love with you. And maybe he wasn't. Maybe this was all a lie, a ruse. 

Just too good to be true.

Klaus was pacing around the courtyard, clearly worked up and ready to take it out on the next person who walked through the door.

"Is it necessary to yell?" Elijah asked, his voice calm and collected.

"I had to make sure to get your attention, since you've been so distracted lately," Klaus snarked, a pointed look on his face.

Elijah let out a sigh, this wasn't the first time they've had this conversation. He was growing tired of Klaus' attitude. "What is it that's so important?" he asked, trying to keep the annoyance out of his tone.

"Y/n is a distraction," Klaus began. "You are blinded by her, and you've become weak and weakness will get us killed." He was speaking quickly and with anger. "You are no longer the man that I've known for a thousand years. You have forgotten where you came from, what you are, and who you are meant to protect."

"Are you suggesting I cast her aside?" Elijah questioned, his voice cold.

"Yes, exactly," Klaus answered, his expression unchanging.

"No," Elijah stated simply.

"She acts far too familiar, and is clearly not one of us," Klaus continued.

"She has proven herself time and time again," Elijah countered. "What more does she need to do?"

"I don't want Hope getting attached to someone that isn't family," Klaus said.

"You can't control who Hope gets close to," Elijah snapped, his anger finally rising.

"I can certainly try," Klaus replied, his tone icy. "And I will. Because you've allowed this woman into our home, our family, and now she's acting as if she belongs."

"She does," Elijah said, his voice steady. "You just have a hard time accepting that."

"If you really care about her, then you will do what is best," Klaus replied, his expression changing. "We both know what happens to your dalliances, they come to tragic ends. I'm trying to spare her from that, brother."

"This isn't some fling, Klaus," Elijah growled, his eyes flashing with rage.

"No, she's just a girl you enjoy fucking! And now Hope is calling her auntie, and she's acting like she's Hope's mother-"

Elijah laughed coldly, his brother was so painfully transparent, his paranoia endless and ever growing. "Is that what this is about? You're afraid of her taking Hayley's place? That I would take yours? Have you officially gone insane?" he mocked, his anger at a breaking point. "Have my actions in the last few years not been clear?"

"She will not be welcomed here once you've tired of her. Once she's gone, Hope will ask for her, and I will not allow that," Klaus stated, his voice rising. "You will have broken a little girls heart because of some stupid infatuation."

Elijah's patience with his brother had worn thin. He had to remind himself that Klaus had suffered so many losses in his long life, that his paranoia had grown into something monstrous. But in times like this, his brother could be utterly cruel, and it was impossible to see him as anything but.

"It's not some stupid infatuation," Elijah seethed, his hands clenched into fists. "I love her, and that's something you will never understand. She has been good for me, and has done nothing but support us. She's not a threat, and you know it. This is the problem with you, you want everyone to suffer as you have."

"That is not what I'm doing-" Klaus began, his voice rising. "She's not one of us, and will never be. You just keep her around as a trophy, to remind yourself that you are capable of caring for another. She doesn't belong here, and it will be her undoing."

Elijah lost his control and snapped. He grabbed his brother and threw him against the wall. Klaus' head hit the stone and cracked loudly. His face contorted into an expression of rage, his eyes flashing gold. He moved forward and punched Elijah in the face, sending him stumbling back. He rushed at his brother and grabbed him by the throat, squeezing tightly. Klaus' anger grew, and his grip tightened.

"Enough!" Hayley screamed, grabbing Klaus' arm and pulling him back. She looked between the two brothers, her eyes wide. "Why are you two fist fighting when my daughter is trying to sleep?!"

Klaus' eyes were wild, and his face was covered in blood, Elijah looked the same, and neither was ready to back down. The only thing stopping them was Hayley's presence. She stood between them, and looked at Klaus. "What did you do? What could you have possibly said to him?" she demanded.

"Y/n isn't family, and never will be," Klaus spat, glaring at Elijah. "I have to protect our daughter."

"Our daughter? You're unbelievable, Klaus," Hayley said, shaking her head. "Go. To. Bed. Both of you," she commanded.

She grabbed Klaus's hand, and dragged him away. Elijah sighed, rubbing his forehead. He looked up and saw you on one of the upper balconies with an unreadable expression on your face.

Had you seen that entire argument? Did you hear the awful things his brother had said about you?

He rushed up the stairs and met you at your bedroom door. You had your bag in your hand, and he knew immediately what was happening.

"You can't," he told you, shaking his head.

"I'm not welcome here," you whispered. "I have to go, Elijah."

"You are always welcome here," he said, reaching for you. "Please, let's talk."

"We have talked," you told him, pushing his hand away. "I've heard everything I needed to hear, Elijah. You keep choosing them over me. It's always your family first, and I understand that, but you have to see how it hurts me. I can't just keep coming second in your life."

"You aren't," he whispered, trying to draw you close, but you gently pushed him away. He felt his heart shatter at the action, and he knew he had lost you. "I want you, I choose you. Don't do this, my love."

You pushed past him, unable to hear anything else he had to say at the moment, you needed space to think, to figure out what you wanted. If this was a fight you could win. "Goodbye, Elijah," you said, giving him one last glance.

He stood there, and he was frozen. How could this have happened? He thought that he had made you understand that this was permanent. That you were forever.

But he had failed to show his love properly and he had to fix what he broke. You were his greatest love, his everything, and he couldn't live without you. He was nothing without you. So he would do whatever it took to bring you back.

Because if you were gone, so was he.

You were staying with Marcel, the only person who understood what it was like to be in the Mikaelson shadow. He wasn't thrilled that Elijah had hurt you, but he did understand that relationships weren't always easy, especially with the Mikaelsons.

He poured you a stiff drink, and let you wallow.

"I shouldn't have gone," you muttered.

"It's Hope's birthday," he pointed out.

"But I should have known better than to get involved like that, it only makes Klaus jealous," you sighed.

"Klaus is a notorious asshole, and Elijah is...well, he's not good with his emotions."

"That's putting it lightly."

You drank the whole glass in one gulp, and poured yourself another.

"I don't know why I thought that he was serious," you grumbled.

"He's serious, but he's also scared," Marcel replied. "It's a lot easier for him to push people away, then have the chance to hurt them."

"It's a terrible feeling, wanting to be a part of a family that doesn't want you," you admitted.

"I know the feeling," Marcel replied, sitting down next to you.

"He told me he loved me. He told me that we were going to spend forever together. And yet, his family still doesn't accept me." You looked up at Marcel, your eyes filled with tears.

"It's just Klaus, the rest of them adore you," he told you.

"How do I get Klaus to trust me? I'm not trying to take his daughter," you insisted.

"Just be patient, give him some time," Marcel advised.

"I've given him four years," you said. "And he's not willing to accept me even a little."

Marcel nodded, and handed you another drink. "Don't worry about Klaus, he'll get over himself."

"And Elijah?" you asked.

Marcel frowned. "That's not my area."

"Yeah," you said, nodding slowly. "Me either."

You and Marcel had a few drinks and talked the night away. By the end, you had almost completely forgotten your heartache, and were simply enjoying the company.

Marcel had fallen asleep, and you were dozing off when your phone buzzed. You opened it and saw a message from Elijah.

We need to talk.

You sighed, and sent him a simple reply.

Tomorrow.

You were far too exhausted to deal with his bullshit right now. You tossed your phone on the coffee table and fell asleep.

The next morning you woke up on Marcel's couch, a blanket thrown over you. You stretched, and grabbed your phone, heading into the kitchen.

Elijah had texted you back.

Meet me outside, I have a car waiting for you.

You frowned. He was sending a car for you? You quickly responded.

Why are you sending a car?

A response came instantly.

It's a surprise.

You shook your head, but smiled a little and texted him back.

Fine, give me 10 minutes.

Hurry, we're on a tight schedule.

You showered, and got dressed, grabbing your bag, and heading out. You gave Marcel a quick goodbye, and hopped into the town car.

Elijah was sitting there, and smiled softly.

"Good morning," he said.

"Morning," you replied.

He looked you over, and you were surprised by the intense gaze. You blushed under his scrutiny.

"What?" you asked.

"You're beautiful," he said softly. "And I'm sorry, for all of this. I never meant to hurt you, or make you feel unwanted."

You shook your head. "I know you didn't," you said. "And it's okay."

"It's not," he told you, reaching for your hand. You let him take it, and he pressed a kiss to your palm.

You flushed, and looked away. "Where are we going?"

"The airport," he replied.

"What? Why?" You were completely confused.

"You are right, I'm not putting you first, and I will not allow that anymore," Elijah replied. "And to prove it, we're going somewhere, just the two of us."

"Where are we going?"

"Italy, we're going to spend a month on the Amalfi Coast." he said, a soft smile on his face.

"A month?" You asked, a hint of excitement in your voice.

"Yes," he nodded, and pressed his lips to the back of your hand. "I've been neglectful, and I need to remind you of how I feel about you.

"Eli, you don't have to do all of this."

"Yes, I do," he replied. "You deserve the world."

He had rented a private plane, and had arranged everything. You were incredibly impressed that he managed to pull it all off in the span of a night.

You sat beside him on the plane, his hand intertwined with yours, and a soft smile on his face. You couldn't help but relax, the last couple of days had been so tense, but you couldn't stay mad at him, and a romantic getaway was exactly what you needed.

As the plane took off, Elijah reached over and brushed your hair out of your face. You lifted the arm rest and cuddled up against him, resting your head on his chest. He held you close, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You missed this, the way he was so attentive, the way he was gentle with you.

"I am sorry, for making you feel second best," he said, his voice low and full of regret.

"I know," you said, reaching up and stroking his cheek. "It's okay, your dedication to your family is part of what I love about you."

You looked up at him and kissed him softly.

"Let's not dwell on the past," you said. "We have a whole month to make new memories."

"I am going to spoil you so much, my love," he said, kissing your nose.

The flight was nearly twelve hours and you immediately fell asleep when the plane leveled out. When you woke up, the sun was starting to set.

Elijah was reading a book, and had his free hand resting on your hip. You smiled, and snuggled closer. He put the book down and looked at you, his eyes soft and full of affection.

"Good morning, or rather evening," he chuckled. "Sleep well?"

"Yeah," you yawned.

You looked out the window, and saw the city below. It was like something out of a dream, colorful houses all stacked up, the sea sparkling as the sun set.

"Welcome to Positano," he said.

"Elijah," you whispered, awe in your voice.

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

"It's magical," you gushed.

"Yes, it is."

The plane landed, and a car was waiting. Elijah had rented an entire villa for the two of you. It was stunning, with a view of the ocean, and a private beach.

You walked through the villa, looking at all the art and antiques. It was very much Elijah's taste, and you could see yourself spending a month here.

The moon was out and it cast a soft glow over the sea. Elijah took your hand and the two of you walked down the stairs to the beach.

The sounds of the waves gently lapping on the sand soothed you. You walked down the shoreline, your hands intertwined.

"You didn't have to do all this, you know," you said, leaning against him.

"I know, but I wanted to. I needed to. It was a selfish thing, really," he replied, wrapping his arms around you.

Up ahead you saw something on the beach, it was too dark to make out, but it looked like a bunch of neatly shaped debris.

You walked a little closer, and you could make out the shapes. It was a heart, surrounded by lit candles, and flowers. The words "I love you" written with rose petals on the sand. Suddenly a bunch of twinkle lights were turned on, and the whole scene was lit up.

You turned around to ask Elijah if he had done this, but the words died in your throat. He was kneeling on the ground, a ring box in his hand.

"Y/n," he began, his voice soft and loving.

"What are you doing?" you asked, a bit breathless.

"I should have done this a long time ago," he said. "I should have married you years ago, but I was afraid. I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to give you everything you deserve."

"Eli-"

"No, let me finish," he insisted, and continued. "I've spent centuries on this earth, never truly belonging anywhere. Always searching, never finding. Until I found you. My home, my heart, my family."

You were crying, tears streaming down your face. You couldn't really process what was happening, here was the man of your dreams, pouring his heart out, telling you how much he loved you, how much he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you.

"You are my world, my everything. And I want to spend eternity by your side," he said, opening the box and showing you the ring.

The ring was absolutely stunning, a large ruby surrounded by diamonds. It looked antique and must have been worth a fortune.

"I found this ring almost five hundred years ago, right here in Italy. I knew that when I finally found the right person, I would give it to them," he said, smiling up at you.

"You can't be serious," you said, not intending for it to sound as harsh as it did. You were in complete shock.

"I have never been more serious in my entire life," he replied, his voice firm.

"What will your family say?" You asked, worried about Klaus’ reaction.

"Niklaus can go fuck himself," Elijah grinned. "As for the rest of them, they will be thrilled."

You nodded slowly, letting the words sink in.

"This is insane," you whispered, unable to stop staring at the ring.

"Is that a yes?" He asked, looking nervous. "Will you be my wife?"

"Yes," you breathed, and he took your hand and slipped the ring onto your finger. It fit perfectly, as though it was made for you.

He stood up, and kissed you. You threw your arms around him, your fingers tangling in his hair, kissing him back with every ounce of love you had for him.

"You're my family, you're my home," he whispered, spinning you around. "And I vow, from this day on, you will always come first. I love you."

"I love you too," you murmured, cupping his cheek. "With all my heart."

He pulled you close, kissing you deeply. You lost yourself in his embrace, in the way his hands felt on your body, his lips on yours, his tongue in your mouth.

You both stumbled to the villa, tearing each other's clothes off. Your back hit the wall, and Elijah pushed your skirt up. His hands found your thighs and he squeezed the soft flesh, lifting you up, your legs wrapped around his waist. He kissed along your neck, leaving little marks in his wake.

"My fiance," he muttered against the flesh. "My darling love."

"I like the sound of that," you moaned.

"Then you're going to absolutely adore being called my wife," he grinned, moving his lips down to your breasts.

His kisses turned bruising, biting at the flesh of your tits. He was rough with you and you relished it. It was like he was finally unleashing his feelings, letting out all the love he had for you.

You tugged on his hair, bringing his lips back to yours, hungry for his kisses, drunk off of his affection.

"Bed, Eli," you murmured, but instead, he picked you up and carried you into the shower.

He set you on your feet and turned the water on.

"We are covered in sand," he grinned.

The steam was rising as the water heated up, and the moment it was hot enough Elijah pulled you in with him. You squealed as the warm water washed over you, cleaning you off.

The water was the perfect temperature, a delicious warmth, but not as delicious as the feeling of him pressing into you, pinning your front against the tile.

He reached up, taking your hands and pinning them to the tile wall.

"Keep your hands here," he commanded, pressing a kiss to the back of one.

You nodded, a small moan escaping your lips, he kissed his way down your back. He ran his tongue down the length of your spine. Soft and gentle, teasing over the top of your ass. His hands ran over your legs, and he bent you slightly, opening your cheeks to reveal the most intimate part of you.

"Beautiful," he murmured, before lapping at you.

Your knees nearly buckled as he pressed his face into your flesh. His hands spread your cheeks wide as his tongue dipped into your core. The way his mouth touched every part of you left you dizzy with need. Your thighs clenched, your clit pulsing, ready to be touched.

But you did what he told you, and kept your hands above your head. The porcelain felt cool on your heated skin and he tugged you closer, your hands moving further down as your body was pulled back. His tongue darted into your center, teasing around your hole, his saliva coating you, trailing up, finding your puckered hole, and slowly circling the muscle.

"Elijah," you whimpered, gasping as his tongue worked you open.

He slipped a finger into your dripping cunt, working it inside, pulling it out and sliding it up, moving to replace his tongue on your tight entrance. He swirled around your asshole before pushing the pad of his finger into your tight heat, his mouth sucking on your ass, soft moans escaping him, vibrating against your flesh.

You struggled to keep yourself upright, your hands against the wall, bracing yourself, wiggling against him. The warm water of the shower cascading over you, the sensations were too much and not enough. You were panting, your head tilted back, eyes closed, as you were overwhelmed by his touch.

He pulled back and stood up, kissing along the back of your neck, he placed his hands on your hips and pulled you close.

"Do you want more, sweetheart?" He murmured in your ear, his voice low and seductive.

"Yes," you breathed, arching against him.

His cock was hard, trapped between the two of you. You ground against him, rubbing yourself on his length, desperate for the friction.

"How much more?" He asked, a smirk in his voice.

"All of it," you said.

"Right here, up against the shower wall?"

"Yes, Elijah, please," you begged.

He hummed and reached between the two of you, taking his length and teasing your core with it. He loved making you beg for him, and he loved hearing the desperation in your voice. But you were now to be his wife, and he was going to take care of you.

He eased himself into your center, groaning at the tightness of you, how good it felt to be surrounded by your warmth. You moaned as he pressed inside of you, the thickness of his cock filling you.

He placed his hands on top of yours against the wall, intertwining your fingers.

"I love you," he murmured, his hips moving against you.

"I love you," you moaned, rocking your hips with him.

He took his time with you, savoring the feeling of your body. He had almost lost you, and he needed to remind you how much you meant to him, how he cherished you.

His slow, languid movements were torture, the heat building inside of you, his thick cock rubbing every inch of your pussy. You moved together, the two of you in sync.

Your orgasm started to build, a slow burn deep within. You had never been so turned on, or so loved, the way he held you, the way he whispered your name like a prayer.

"That's it, baby, come for me," he encouraged, his hips picking up the pace.

He could feel the change, and he knew exactly how to push you over the edge. His thrusts became harder, more purposeful. His lips found the sensitive spot on your neck, and he sucked the tender flesh.

Your walls clenched and you fell apart, coming undone for him, moaning his name, over and over. He smiled against your skin, he could stay buried inside of you forever, and never tire of the way you made him feel.

He turned off the shower and pulled you to the bedroom, his lips never leaving yours. He laid you down on the bed, his body on top of yours.

"I can't wait to make love to you every day, for the rest of our lives," he smiled.

"That's a long time, Eli," you teased.

"Not long enough," he smirked.

He took your legs and spread them, kneeling between them. He guided his length into you, and pushed all the way in.

He groaned, loving the way your body opened up to him, the way you felt like home.

"Elijah," you gasped, your hands reaching for him, needing to touch him.

"I love the way you say my name," he smiled, leaning down and kissing you, his tongue licking into your mouth.

He rocked into you, slowly, the feeling of you was addictive. You were his drug and he would never be able to get enough of you. He pictured all the ways he would make love to you, the ways he would please you, worship you.

"My beautiful girl," he groaned, his body on fire, his desire burning, and it only fueled his need.

His hips snapped against yours, and you gripped the sheets, the pleasure coursing through you. Another orgasm was building, the feeling of him deep inside of you, the way he looked at you with such love.

"Come with me, my love," he pleaded, his hand moving between the two of you, finding your clit, his fingers gently rubbing the bundle of nerves.

He was so close, and he was determined to have you come with him, to fall apart for him, together.

You whimpered and moaned, your hips lifting to meet his, chasing the feeling, knowing it was so close. He pressed his lips to yours, and the dam broke, crashing over the both of you.

You came together, moaning, his cock twitching as he emptied inside of you, your walls clenching and milking him, taking everything he had to offer.

You collapsed, boneless, spent, completely and utterly satisfied. He smiled at the sight of you, blissed out and glowing, your hair wet and splayed out over the pillows. . He had never seen anything so beautiful in his entire life.

He laid down next to you, making sure to keep you close. You curled into his chest, and his arms wrapped around you, holding you tight.

"So, tell me more about this wedding of ours," you grinned, holding your hand up to look at your ring.

"I'll arrange everything, don't you worry about a thing," he said softly, nuzzling your neck.

"Is that so? I don't get any input?" you teased, turning to look at him, your lips brushing against his.

"I mean, you can make suggestions, if you'd like," he smirked, his hand running along the curve of your hip.

"Hmm, well, I do think we should get married in Positano," you smiled, and his eyes lit up.

"It’s perfect here, isn't it?" he mused, a soft smile on his lips.

"I want it to be a small wedding," you said, tracing patterns on his chest. "Family and close friends only."

"Of course," he replied. "I want it to be something just for us."

The two of you talked until the early morning, dreaming up your future together, and making plans for your wedding. It would be a simple affair, a celebration of your love, in a beautiful location, with the people who cared about the two of you the most.

The month spent in Italy was something out of a dream, the days filled with long walks on the beach, picnics in the gardens, and nights filled with dancing and drinking. You made love in the most luxurious beds, and in the most unorthodox places, including the rooftop patio one night. You even made it a bit of a game, seeing who could find the best spots to fuck in. Elijah always won, and was very proud of himself, you loved seeing him so carefree, so happy.

There was no talk of his family or what was going on at home. It was like you were in your own little world, just the two of you. But it was time to return home, the news of your engagement was something you both wanted to share in person.

When you entered the compound, Hope came running up to her favorite uncle, Elijah scooped her up in his arms and spun her around.

"Uncle ‘lijah! Auntie y/n you're home!" she grinned, and you smiled at her, ruffling her hair.

"Have you been behaving for your mother?" Elijah asked, carrying her towards the courtyard, letting her tell you both all about what she had been up to while you were away.

"I see the trip did you both some good," Klaus said, walking towards the three of you. His eyes darted to the ring on your finger, the red ruby catching the light. "Is that what I think it is?"

"What is?" Hope asked, looking confused.

"I asked aunt y/n to marry me," Elijah told Hope, smiling sweetly at her.

"You did?" She exclaimed, her eyes wide.

"Yes," you nodded, laughing at the excitement.

Hope hugged Elijah tightly, and Klaus looked at his brother, a hint of a smile on his lips. The sight of his daughter so happy warmed his heart.

"Well, I wish you both every bit of happiness," he said, giving you a tight smile.

"Thank you," you replied, knowing his words were sincere and it was probably the most enthusiastic response you would ever get from him. It was progress and that was enough for you.

Elijah put Hope down, and she took off running, the news of your engagement clearly something she was very excited about. You could hear her yelling the news as she ran through the compound. Rebekah was the first to appear, pulling you into a tight hug.

"Congratulations!" She beamed, and you hugged her back, her enthusiasm contagious. "I better be a bridesmaid."

The rest of the Mikaelson's slowly came and offered their congratulations. Hayley and Freya both hugged you, Marcel shook Elijah's hand and Kol gave you a warm smile. Hope was thrilled, talking a mile a minute about all the ways she was going to help with the wedding.

"Can I be a bridesmaid?" she asked, her cute little face pleading.

You knelt down so you were at her level, taking her hand. "How about something even more special? No one else at the wedding is going to have such an important job."

"What is it?" She asked, her face completely in awe.

"Will you be my flower girl?"

She squealed and jumped into your arms, squeezing you tight. "Really? Yes! I'd love to!"

You laughed and hugged her back.

Elijah watched the scene, a warmth in his chest. You were his family, his home, the missing piece that had made him whole. He had finally found the love he had been searching for.

You caught him staring, and walked over to him, his arm wrapping around your waist. He kissed the side of your head and let out a contented sigh. You were everything he ever wanted and so much more.

"I can't wait to call you my wife," he smiled.

"Neither can I," you said, your lips meeting his, sealing the promise, always and forever.

♡♡ Tag-List ♡♡

♡ @gorgeouslydangerous ♡ @starkleila ♡ @lydia1369sworld ♡ @notleylaaa ♡ @vampiresluv ♡ @vamprium ♡ @myanmy ♡ @xflowerbombxo ♡ @maryvibess ♡ @always-and-forever-daydreaming ♡ @criminallminds ♡ @theesexystallion ♡ @rosemarypotion ♡ @spnaquakindgdom ♡ @amournoir ♡ @loving-and-dreaming ♡

♡ @meeom ♡ @damienmorton ♡ @wickedmuse ♡ @sunkissedebony97 ♡ @idk00sblog ♡ @savannaounana ♡ @cs-please ♡ complicatedandconfusing-25 @hamiltimes ♡ @akala6670229 ♡ @yeaiamme2 ♡ @itsjulzandmydiamonds ♡ @spideysbabe ♡ @witch-of-letters ♡ @elijahmikaelsonsboy ♡ @rosecentury ♡

#elijah mikaelson #klaus mikaelson #the originals #the vampire diaries #vampire diaries #tvdu #elijah mikaelson smut #hope mikaelson #rebekah mikaelson #hayley marshall #elijah mikaelson imagine #elijah mikealson imagine #elijah mikealson #elijah mikaelson x reader #elijah mikealson x reader #tvd #the vampire diaries x you #the vampire diaries x reader #the vampire diares imagine #the vampire diaries imagine #the originals imagine #engagement #romance

[everysongineverykey]

the narrator's google search history must be like. how to tell when humans are mad. how to tell when humans are happy. most common human emotions. can you edit steam reviews. 100 most serious tables home depot. fun buttons for humans to push. what does a hug feel like. human expressions. the stanley parable game of the year. the stanley parable 2022 awards nominations? what does rain feel like on skin. what does sunlight feel like on skin. forest cabin. nostalgic french music for forest cabin. are forest cabins good for romantic getaways. difference in feeling between warm and cold. minecraft free download. portal free download. friendship free download? firewatch free download. humans dancing. humans singing. how far a fall will kill a human? how to negotiate with humans. are all humans annoyingly stubborn. what makes a human human? loving wife voice filter. requirements for happiness. (stanley kissing.) guitar tutorial easy. guitar music through history. how do i make humans like me. how to deal with feelings for buckets. how to deal with feelings for stanley. will i ever be free.

#the stanley parable #he. is like queen d/ltarune to me in that he is constantly searching for ways to understand #and get through to humans OSTENSIBLY to get them to buy his game but really more deeply to be more like them. #because when it comes down to it he does not know what he is he has no name he is just 'the narrator'. he does not exist #outside of his function in the game his identity is tied to this parable and he just wants to be something #someone more. he wants to be free but he can't. he's stuck here with stanley #someone who he loves deeply- desperately- dangerously- but can't seem to understand at all #he just wants to be seen. known. understood. he wants connection but it's so hard #when you're everywhere at once and your only companion would rather be nowhere than with you

[noxtivagus]

i'll read more from now on again

#🌙.rambles #so much to just think about n i'm lost in my own lil world #tmrrw gna have to face reality again bcs of school :c but. yk lately this year i think i've already developed lots #this past week has been especially formative. #i crave n yearn.. intimacy so much. i want to just be free like that. bcs i'm safe in my own self n. too much to say but #i think it's lonely. being out a lot today made me realize that. all these barriers in communication is so.. lonely #i want to read so much more for so many reasons but here with what i've already laid out the first reason i'll say is #i want to understand others better i want to even further expand my own thinking n just learn so much more #n then.. goddamn i want to write too. write so much so i could #it hurts. it hurts so much i feel like i know n think n feel more than i should n the wisdom is breaking me apart i don't know how to put it #into words. maybe that's why i've been afraid to start new things despite my insatiable curiosity n passion. #afraid of how it'll fill me with even more & i'm not sure how i'd manage. i feel as though i understand life differently than most.. #most people around me at least. i see myself in musicians. artists. writers. #people who create once they've taken in much as well. people like me but.. it's been rather disturbing when i realize how most of them end #up like. n i wonder. i just wonder so much. n wish n dream that maybe i could end up differently. #i want so desperately to break out of the chains of reality of society of.. all those. idead that are taught to us n internalized ever since #we were born? i don't know how to write it and i don't think words could ever do it justice. but i want to truly be who i am at heart. #and yet being self-aware i suppose is confusing in such a bittersweet way. there's so much more that i do not know and cannot grasp #& then sometimes at the end of the day i just wonder n dream about if ever i would be more connected with reality. with this world. #regardless of how much one may put out to the world.. it'll never be understood or known in the same way as the one it originates from. #it's lonely. sad. but it makes what we can convey and relate with much more meaningful. n i'm so grateful for those things #n there's also just so much that relates to it n. yeah. is part of it like #the unconscious subconscious n conscious mind #for fuck's sake i want to learn so much it's overwhelming. psychoanalysis n neuroscience n #i want to learn more of others too. i want deep conversations. i want to read more books n listen to more music n just consume more n more #to learn more of the people who created them. everything around us is just so full of life n. it's so beautiful n so overwhelmingly painful. #my helplessness in doing more. i'm aware of why. n it just hurts. it hurts so much but i'm #glad at least that lately i've been more free. more myself. more self-aware n aware of the universe in general. n i look forward to #so much more. but.. yeah i still crave to be 'real' n part of this world in a more 'normal' way at times #i. have so much to write. but for now i'll return to reality with the this.. odd feeling in my chest. not enough too little too much. life

[imyourbratzdoll]

Chris Evans dates a short-sized! well-known photographer freelancer, reader. one day, reader came with chris to comic con dressing up captain America (but with skirt and showing off her belly button). Smut daddy + size + daddy + princess + punishment + spit + blowjob kink

hello, I never received a response on who you'd rather than chris. so I chose steve. I hope you like it.

summary - you surprise your boyfriend with a replica of his uniform, and the only difference is that it's more slutty.

warning - smut, daddy kink, spit kink, oral sex, spanking, swearing, semi-public sex.

18+ only please, the gif I use isn't mine, divider by @newlips

You wanted to surprise Steve. 

Today was the day the avengers went to comic con. They agreed to take photos and sign autographs for the fans that loved them. You told Steve that you’d be the photographer today and that you’d meet him later only because you had a costume you wanted to surprise him with.

When Steve walked into the room, he was confident about meeting his fans. But the moment his eyes landed on you, who stood behind the camera. His jaw clenched, and his pants tightened. The sight of you smiling innocently at him while wearing a slutty version of his uniform made him feral. Steve desperately wanted to grab hold of you and fuck you in front of everyone, but he had to keep his cool, unfortunately. 

When one of the staff came over and stated it was time for a break, Steve stormed over to you and grabbed you. Throwing your tiny form over his shoulder as he stalked off to a private room, his hand resting possessively over your plump ass.

“Stevie! Where are you taking me?” A whimper escapes you as he spanks your ass.

“It’s daddy to you, princess.” When he enters the room, he slams the door closed, ensuring it’s locked. Steve roughly places you on the ground and pushes you to your knees. “You don’t get to speak. You will suck my cock until I say otherwise. If you touch yourself or stop, you won’t get to cum for a week. Understood?” His rough, gravel tone sends tingles between your thighs. 

You nod, eyes wide and mouth hanging open. You whimper as Steve grips your chin roughly. “Words, princess.”

“Yes, daddy. I understand.” Steve grunts in approval, his hands rushing, as he unbuckles his belt and whips his massive, throbbing member out. Your mouth begins to water as your eyes focus on the pre-cum leaking from his swollen, red tip. Steve groans as he taps it against your plump lips. His hands begin to pump his thick base.

“Spit on daddy’s cock, princess.” Steve’s eyes flutter shut as he feels you spit on his swollen cock. A stuttered groan escapes him as your lips wrap around him, sucking his soul through his cock. Steve’s fingers tangle in your hair, gripping your head as you bob up and down. “Jesus, princess. You’re doing so good!” 

A moan escapes you, sending vibrations through his member. Causing Steve’s hips to jerk, your cheeks hollowed as you sucked harder, taking him as far into your mouth as possible. Your hands come up and massage his balls. A string of saliva is attached as his cock leaves your mouth with a pop, and your eyes connect with his eyes as you suck his balls into your mouth. Moaning around them as he curses, his head is thrown back while he pushes you into them more. 

“Fuck! Fuck– You’re going to make me cum! You better fucking swallow it all, and I swear if you waste a bit of it, you will be punished.” He growls, guiding your head back to his aching cock, sliding it past your lips before he begins to fuck your face. Your gags fill the room as his tip hits the back of your throat, drool seeping out of the side of your mouth, covering yourself and the floor. “I’m cumming, princess! Remember to fucking swallow.” His pace picks up until he fills your mouth with his cum, watching you swallow his cum around his cock. 

You lick his member clean, sucking his tip before you lean back. Your tongue flicks out as you lick the cum from your lips. “Thank you, daddy.” You blink up at him, and a squeal leaves your lips as Steve picks you up and wraps your legs around his waist, his hand stroking your cheek as he stares into your eyes.

“You’re my good girl, aren’t you, princess?” You nod, giving him a sweet smile.

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

#imyourbratzdollasks #imyourbratzdollwork #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers #steve rogers angst #steve rogers au #steve rogers drabble #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers fic #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers one shot #steve rogers x f!reader #steve rogers x fem!reader #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x you #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans angst #chris evans blurb #chris evans character #chris evans characters #chris evans drabble #chris evans fan fic #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans fandom

[vroomvroomwee]

God the queer experience of meeting wonderful people who are actually kind, compassionate, and thoughtful. Becoming close friends. But still feeling this deep sense of otherness. This deep dissonance between you and them that stems from the fact that they have no idea who you are.

It fucking hurts to have these people hang out with you and like you, and knowing deep down that they won't like the REAL you, but instead this masked persona that you put up for the sake of your own safety. It hurts knowing that every time you talk to them, you know that they're talking to someone else. That someone else is pushing you back and making conversation with your friends. Stealing them from you.

And it's not like we have much choice. People constantly say oh find other queer people, oh just make trans friends, oh you need a community. As if it's that easy. As if we don't already desperately long for some form of recognition, of connection. As if we don't claw our hearts out every night because we want the space next to us to be occupied. To be understood. To be valued. To be worth a damn. To be loved. Some of us just don't have that choice.

It hurts that I can't be friends with these lovely people because of the hand I was dealt. And yeah, I'm ready to hear the "if they don't accept the real you, then they were never lovely people to begin with." True. That's true. But I'm not oblivious to the fact that if I was cishetallo then I would actually have friends. And feel known. And feel seen.

I know we're supposed to love ourselves no matter what and these days you'll basically be torn apart if you so much as insinuate that you're not proud of your identity. But goddammit I'm not. It's hard. And I know trans is beautiful. And queer is beautiful. And it's liberating. But I just wish they knew it too. And it's fucking lonely

#anyways this is my rant #ill be back to my bullshit by tommorow dw #queer #queer experience #ace #asexual #asexuality #aro #aromantic #aromanticism #trans #transgender #nonbinary #non binary #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbt pride #pride

[ts1m1kas]

Original Ask: here's one for jude 😁 they're childhood friends, have known one another for so long, everyone says they are a perfect fit but jude brushes off the idea because deep down he doesn't want to admit he's in love with her, she on the other hand doesn't have time for relationships cause of her career as a ballerina. they stop talking for about three years until they meet again in madrid, she's dragged by her girlfriends to see real madrid play, that's when she sees jude, they reconnect with jude finally ready to confess his feelings, however one of his teammates tries to jump in the way. (@findingnemosworld)

Word Count: 761 words

(author's note: everyone thank @findingnemosworld for her amazing requests !! i did change the ending a little so i hope thats okay 🫶)

Jude always thought that Y/N was the most beautiful girl in the world. Her smile could light up a room, and her laugh was like music to his ears. They had been friends since he could remember, spending most of their childhood years as an inseparable pair.

What Jude didn’t realise is that Y/N felt exactly the same about him. His happy-go-lucky personality made her enjoy being around him, and the side of him that was ever-so caring made her fall head over heels for the boy.

But through Jude’s move to Real Madrid and Y/N’s gruelling career as a ballerina, the pair had fallen apart. This shocked everyone around them, as anyone who looked their way would assume they were a couple. There was no one else in the world who would've been more of a perfect fit together than Jude and Y/N.

Jude Bellingham wasn’t scared of most things. He’d played professional football for years. Suffered online abuse and gone through many hardships throughout his life. But the idea of telling Y/N how he felt about her had him shaking with fear. He valued her friendship more than anything else, so when he had to let his best friend know he was moving away, it broke his heart.

Y/N was devastated. Jude’s departure had made her lose her drive and motivation and her ballet career was suffering because of it. Her coach was pushing her to her limits to distract her from the gaping hole that Jude had left behind in her life with his departure.

Time passed, and the pair hadn’t spoken in months. But that didn’t mean that they didn’t think of one another every passing minute, of every passing day.  

Y/N had a break in ballet performances, and it just so happened that her dance group’s next show was in Madrid. Her friends had been given tickets to a football game, and she blindly agreed to go. Her friend, who had been given the tickets, was married to a player from one of the teams playing, and Y/N desperately needed a chance to relax.

Jude was sat in the changing rooms. He was listening to Vinicius Jr. give them a pep talk before their game against Sevilla. He had a strange feeling his his stomach but he couldn’t place it. 

"Jude, are you okay?" Luka asked him, noticing the look on his Jude's face.

“Yeah man, I’m fine”, Jude responded, brushing off his friend’s concerns.

And so the game began. Y/N and her friends sat, immersed in the game. She always used to watch Jude play, and the interest in football had stuck, even after he moved away. However, when the line-ups were announced and the players walked out, Y/N felt sick. She hadn’t seen Jude in three years since his move to Madrid, and the painful memories rocketed to the forefront of her mind.

Jude ran onto the pitch. As he stood through the pre-game formalities, his eyes wandered over the masses of spectators that had turned up to watch their teams play. However, his eyes widened when they connected with those belonging to a familiar face.

Y/N’s mouth dropped open. The look she shared with Jude was one full of shock and pain. Jude mouthed ‘meet me after the game’ and she understood immediately.

It was an interesting game that resulted in a draw. Each side fought hard, but neither of them could grasp the winning goal. Jude had never been so eager to leave the pitch as he rushed over to where Y/N was waiting for him.

As he stood in front of the girl he had loved his whole life, he faltered. Jude knew he couldn’t hold his feelings back any longer.

“Y/N, I love you. I have for so many years and I-”

“Jude, I love you too.”

Jude stopped talking. He had been waiting to hear those three words come out of her mouth since he had learned what they meant. He couldn’t stop himself anymore. He stepped forward, cupped her face with his hand, and kissed her. 

Jude poured every ounce of love he had for Y/N into that kiss. The fondness he felt for her was unbeaten, the years he spent hiding it, filled with regret.

Once they broke away, the looked at eachother. The look was not filled with pain this time, it had been replaced with love and tenderness.

The pair left the stadium, reunited and ready to spend their days together.

#jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham #fanfiction #fanfic #football #hot footballers #real madrid fc #real madrid #request #by ts1m1kas

[simpingland]

Never Pretending// Jace Velaryon x Fem!oc. Part 1.

Anon request:Major fluff and angst and jealousy- I’m thinking childhood best friends into enemies after the driftmark fight and through episode 8 when they meet again.

Summary: Gaella Targaryen (Alicent's kid) and Jace Velaryon were friends long before they understood what green and black meant. When they meet again six years later, they realise that there was always something more to both the court and their own friendship. Part 2

A/N: This will continue. This request was beautiful but had spoilers, so I won't post it completely. Stay tuned for part 2!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a time when Gaella had dreamed of being betrothed to Jacaerys Velaryon, and though she had never told her mother, her childhood was a happy one because of him. Born in the same year, the servants could always see the little blonde and brown heads wandering around the castle. Jace likes to wake her up early to explore corners that they were already starting to see too much, but Gaella's imagination helped her to see everything in a new way. And so the years passed, walking side by side, while the girl told him the legends of the kings and princes before them. He was the one who dared to cross the areas forbidden to them by the adults, and she was the one who knew the stories forbidden to them by the adults. Everyone knew of this friendship, but few approved of it. Gaella was aware at an early age of the rumours about Jace and Luke, her brother Aegon told her plainly one day when no one was around.

She never had the courage to tell Jace the truth. His love for Harwin was tender, but he also admired Leanor, and he loved to show off Vermax. The last thing Gaella wanted to do was to dispel that happiness, to pull him abruptly out of the limbo his mother had put them in to protect them. What Gaella did dislike was that the Prince was never confused by his appearance, never asked questions, and participated so actively in Aegon's jokes, unaware that Aegon was one of the greatest spokesmen for his illegitimacy. A rift started when Jace began to feel confident enough to make fun of Aemond. Prince Aemond wasn't particularly nice to Gaella, but they shared a taste for studies and could hold entertaining conversations. So when they laughed at his desperation to get a dragon, only Gaella understood how cruel the joke had been.

"There was no need to make fun of something that is not his fault," Gaella said to Jace as they walked back to the castle.

"It was Aegon's idea," he tried to justify himself.

"You're not much better if you follow him after..."

That night, Jace didn't want to apologise to Aemond. But the next morning, knowing that he had irritated his dearest friend, he woke her up with a piece of cake hidden in a napkin. He gave it to her as an apology, and the girl couldn't stay angry much longer. Such was Jace, as sweet as he was unruly, much quieter than his brother Luke, but both had inherited the mischievous side their mother had been known for.

King Viserys might be the only one who smiled at the thought of seeing Gaella and Jace together. He loved to hear their daily scurrying on the other side of his door, reminding him that life was beautiful and innocent for some still, and that the enmity between his wife and daughter was being offset by the friendship between their children. But her mother, Alicent, despite trying to connect with her, always ended up scolding her. She scolded her when she found her disobeying her orders, yelled at her when she stained her clothes, and of course, always pulled her away from Jace every chance she got. At first, Alicent let her be. She was so small, and she could control her. But as she grew older, the arguments were no longer about rules or dresses. Some day, which would come sooner rather than later, Gaella would be a woman, a woman who must marry, and whose company must be kept from men. Whatever Gaella's feelings for Jace, what mattered was that no one should suspect anything more than friendship. The night Jace and Gaella made peace, the two of them left the castle, escaping to an abandoned tower where they spent the entire day playing and talking. She kissed him goodbye with a kiss on the cheek that left his face flushed, and Gaella went into her room thinking that this would be the end of the best day of her life. But when she saw her mother waiting for her, she knew it wasn't true.

"How is it that you are so smart, Gaella, and at the same time, be so dumb?" she asked. The girl made herself small before Alicent.

"I'm sorry, mother. It's just that we didn't have lessons today and we got distracted..."

"I don't care where you went, what I care about is who you went with," she interrupted her, raising her voice.

"It's Jace, mother. Nothing bad can happen to me being with Jace."

"Oh, how innocent you are, my love." She walked over and knelt down to be at her level, holding her hands lovingly. "I was close friends with your mother a long time ago, too... but they don't love us. Not really."

"Jace does love me, mother," tears began to well up in the girl's eyes, confused and hurt.

"You know well that Jace is not a Targaryen like you. That he who claims to be their father is not telling the truth. It is not right in the eyes of the Seven, and it is not right for the throne. And Rhaenyra knows it too, and soon Jace will. And all of this, Gaella, do you know what this means?"

The girl shook her head.

"It means we are in danger. Your brothers, me...you. Those with sense will refuse to bow the knee to Rhaenyra and her bastards and she will seek to annihilate any other option the people may have. And that other option is us."

"But Rhaenyra is my sister...and Jace is my friend and would never hurt me."

"That's what they think now. But when your father leaves us, Rhaenyra will want to keep you trapped, and she'll end up with us. Everything Jace does now is to try to use you in the future. He'll make you live a life in captivity, while he kills Aegon and Aemond, and any children they may have. And then you will see that this is all a big lie. They want us to cover for them while they lie to others. The only scenario in which you come out alive is the one where they use you to have platinum-haired heirs. Is that the future you want?"

Gaella didn't know what future she wished for yet, she just wanted to worry about her dinner and her soft pyjamas. But she also knew she didn't want to see her family die, no matter how long she might still be alive.

"No, mother," she whispered.

"Then you must resist, stay away from Jace."

The next dress she wore the next day was still blue, like the previous ones, but the headband that held her hair back was green. And that day she told Jace that she would rather go with Helaena to sew. It was a lie, and during the long hours of sewing, Gaella thought constantly of how much she missed Jace. Then she heard her mother's voice, and it all made sense again. Days passed, and Jace kept calling her, but she gave him little more than a smile. The prince made the most of the little time he allowed her, accompanying her wherever she went before he strayed, telling her a summary of the things that had happened in her absence. Lessons with him were still fun, but Jace became aware of Gaella's newfound ignorance of him. He said a secret farewell to the Prince as they left for Dragonstone. She wore no green anywhere and gave him a big hug in secret. She wept silently for days, only Helaena could see her.

By the time they were reunited at Driftmark, Jace's absence had become routine, and she bonded with Aemond. Still, he never wanted to go out beyond the library and would get angry when Gaella insisted on mischief. When she saw him at Laena's funeral, she was immediately happy. He looked sad, and the news of Ser Harwin's death had reached all the lords. And she went to comfort him when she found him holding hands with Baela Targaryen.It was silly, but the pain in her chest was so great that Gaella turned away, trying not to cry. Remembering the one time they had hold hands like that, she recognized the affection and curiosity in the grip between Baela and Jace.

Aemond was eyeing Vhagar, not paying attention to anything else, so when he told his sister he was going to claim her, she couldn't stop him, he was determined. Then the worst happened. Holding Aemond's hand as his eyelid was sewn shut, Rhaenyra deflected attention to the fact that someone had told the truth, that Jace and Luke were bastards. That night, she could see everything her mother explained to her and how lonely they could be. The next day, Jace tried to win a hug from Gaella, but Gaella, dressed head to toe in green, turned her back on him, without a word.

Six years passed, and Jace had sent a few messages that Gaella refused to answer. Every day, more and more locked up in her castle, more and more still, for the walks took her back to those precious evenings with her friend Jace. The only words she began to hear were those of Alicent and Aemond, Helaena's sadness when they sewed, Otto's speeches, and the unpleasantness of Aegon's presence, made an impression on Gaella. Rightly so, she was deeply saddened, but she was at ease with the routine and felt tremendously annoyed when they arrived back at court. Of course, it was Rhaenyra's first accusation of her children's origins, and it would not be a pleasant visit.

She could see him when she looked out the window. How much he had changed...Gaella never imagined that Jace could have been so handsome and that indeed, with his Strong features, his mother's genes made him look like a true prince. He could see her then, and Jace didn't know what to do, for he had long since given up on their friendship, yet there she was, peering out, dressed in green and not daring to approach. He could see her slip back inside within seconds of connecting glances.

Over the years, Jace could get a sense of what had happened, and his mother had never told him otherwise. And he would not be ashamed to be the son of a man as brave as Harwin, but he had a right to his throne because he was ready for it. Still, it couldn't stop him from dreaming at night of winning back Gaella's smile. And he could not help but feel anger when he thought that she had already chosen sides in such a cowardly way. Now he saw her and did not know if he really recognised her in all that harshness. He searched the castle slyly for her, with Lucerys at his side. It was in the night time, prowling the gardens, that he could see her enjoying the cool wind.

"The castle has changed so much since I was here," Jace told her. The girl only gave him a sidelong glance.

"You've changed a lot too," she replied dryly.

"No, not really." He looked down at her green dress and the lack of smile on her face. "You have changed, even if you still have the same face as when you were little."

"You can not talk about what I am like when we haven't spoken for six years."

"It's not because I haven't tried to avoid it." Jace bristled, but she only stood up straighter in her place. "I've written to you and you never answered."

"I didn't say I disliked the lack of contact. I know very well what I have and haven't done over the years. And I'd like to keep things the same."

As Gaella turned to leave, Jace stepped in front of her, blocking her path and forcing her to look him in the eye.

"Do you really think I don't have a say about you? We were friends, thick as thieves." Jace was trying to recognize something in her face to keep faith.

"We were children together, but we've grown apart."

"We haven't grown that far apart, Gaella. Tell me, do you still enjoy stories about Nymeria? Do you still drink orange juice with honey biscuits in the evenings?" Jace watched as his friend's sparkle returned to her eyes for a moment. "You're certainly still sitting on the yellow rose bench in the garden. That hasn't changed."

Gaella did not know what to say. She shook her head and looked at the Prince before her. His broad shoulders and brown eyes looked at her with an affection she needed, genuine affection, not the familiar kind.

"You don't understand, Jacaerys. You cling too tightly to something that existed for too short a time. We can no longer be children, and we can no longer pretend that all will be well. Tomorrow you will be robbed of an inheritance you clearly do not deserve. So I'm not going to lie to you. I don't want to... I don't want to lie to you."

And with that, Gaella tried to walk away, leaving Jace behind, whose last words she heard echoing in the garden, leaving her heartbroken for the entire night.

"I've never pretended, Gaella. I've never had to do it with you."

~

The next day, Gaella's gaze didn't travel far from Jace. She couldn't help it, though he was good at it, only glancing back at her from time to time, not getting flustered, knowing that Gaella was caught between her brothers. But he would not let her have the satisfaction of knowing how much he cared for her. He'd already tried, and he'd already wasted his time. Besides, now he had to worry about Luke and about honouring his future wife, Baela. When the call ended bloodily, the night came slowly and stormily. A forced dinner, to please the old king.

Jace was talking to Baela, of whom he was somewhat fond, when Gaella came through the door. In a green dress, of course, but so beautiful that Jace lost the thread of his conversation. Her curves stood out, reminding him that indeed, much time had passed and she had begun to become a woman. A woman who gave Jace a rather dirty look, not really understanding why. Gaella almost left when she walked in and saw them together again. A beauty like Baela who made Jace smile and who would spend the dinner by his side. She instead sat next to her brother Aemond, who was silent and disgusted by the happy ending of the boy who snatched his eye. When their mothers apologised to each other, Jace pointed his glass discreetly at Gaella and immediately wanted to cry. He still didn't understand. Life was never that fair. And every time he and Baela smiled at each other, Gaella felt like throwing herself between them. As her mother had told her, Jace had only wanted to use her, and now that she would not be his wife, his attention was elsewhere. And when he asked Helaena to dance, she could see him glancing sideways at her, as if he felt the same pity for her as he did for Helaena. And as it now costum with the family, the scene ended violently.

Gaella walked to her sister's room to help her put her children to sleep, as always. She had put on her blue sleep dress with woven clouds. When Jace couldn't sleep, his shoulder sore from the fall he walked across the hall, where he recognized her voice. Gaella was telling stories with the passion that had entranced him as a child. And he waited for her to finish, enjoying the scent of his old friend. Little did she know that he was there, listening and smiling.

"You should go to bed. They'll put you on the ship early tomorrow," Gaella told him when she found him half asleep outside the room.

"Your voice has put me to sleep. As I suppose it has put the children to sleep."

Gaella tried to suppress a smile. She blushed as Jace ran his eyes down her dress.

"And now it's my bedtime," she informed him, still in her seat. Jace just smiled.

"Goodnight then."

She didn't move, she couldn't because he wasn't moving. She watched as he clutched his shoulder.

"Does it hurt?"

"Quite a lot. But I just need to move it a bit...forget that the bump is there." He moved his shoulder slowly, and his face couldn't hide the pain.

"That's not how you fix things. I think you learned that lesson today."

Jace just sighed, watching her face, the one he had missed so much.

"I should have asked you to dance too. You're a better dancer than Helaena."

"That's a lie... I was always stepping on your feet."

Jace laughed.

"True, true... but I liked you better. I liked dancing with you because I had an excuse to touch your hands." He could see Gaella remember and smiled slightly. He didn't know that Gaella felt electricity when they had danced as children." I see you, Gaella. And I'm more than willing to help you get out of here, where they have you trapped in green and sat with a man who barely speaks a word to you. Sometimes I see you so clearly... I know you are in there, beneath all that."

She stared at him, her eyes glowing with unwanted tears about to fall. And then Gaella shook her head, returning to his dark gaze.

"You should have asked your future wife to dance."

Jace watched again as her curly white hair moved as she turned her back on him once more, disappearing into the darkness of the hallway. The pain in his shoulder returned to Jace immediately.

#house of the dragon #house of the dragon fanfiction #jacaerys velaryon x reader #prince jacaerys #jacaerys targaryen #jacaerys x reader #jacaerys velaryon x oc #jacaerys x oc #harry collett

[oh-for-fic-sake-library]

Padawan

Masterlist

Summary: Being captured by your old master was meant to mean torture, interrogation and execution. So why were you here? Why is he being so nice and trying to relive old times. And why the fuck is he giving you affection?

Warnings : swearing, anxiety, fluff, Jedi order bashing?, Emperor Anakin, Suitless vader,

A/N: here is another Anakin oneshot, i enjoyed this though i think it could have been better. But if im honest if i keep tweaking it i will lose my mind. So here you go, enjoy lovelies 😘

Wordcount: around 6900

You shivered in the cold cell, curling your arms around your chest, tugging your cloak tighter trying to fed off the chill setteling uncomfortably into your bones. You werent sure what was going on, theoretically you were meant to have been executed the moment the inquisitors found you, but apparently you were different from the others.

And in a way you were different, youd only been a padawan for a few months when the shit hit the fan. Youd never completed training or been knighted just helped as much as you could during the war and your training.

When the empire rose to power and the other jedi watched carefully youd been ordered to hide. Obi wan had pleaded with you to get as far away from everyone as you could. You hadnt understood back then, why was he giving you orders? Why wasnt your master there with you? Youd asked over and over where anakin was, unable to fend off the fear of something happening to him. You werent supposed to but you and your master had created a bond on the battlefield. A close call had prompted Anakin to seal your forces together in some odd taboo bond.

No one would tell you where your master was, or what he was doing. Finally obi wan had just blurted it out. He was dead. You paused, liar. It was a lie, you knew it was you could still feel him. His force signature was still lingering on the edges of your mind. He was wounded, desperate and above all angry.

Once obi wan had lied to your face youd left. It was disturbing. Why? Why was he lying to your face? What else could he have lied about? Things progressed quickly after that, youd abandoned the order and hid yourself on a tiny planet known for living off the land, trading produce, lumber and gem stones.

The massacre happened, and shortly after the news came. As much as you hoped your master was alive you never wanted it to be like that. He was sith now.To say you never saw the dark side in anakin was a lie. There was rage, pride, ambition even fear. Youd always reasoned it was to protect his loved ones. Even though the code forbid love an attachment, it wasnt exactly a bad thing right? Anakin was still protecting the innocent. So it couldnt be so bad? Useing the dark side for good is still good right? Good and evil are subjective, nothing is inherently bad or good, it all depends on the motive, method and reason. At least thats what youd told yourself to justify his actions.

It's said Anakin had lost himself in a rage and almost killed obi wan on a battle on mustafa. Obi wan had fled, before Anakin could deliver the final blow. The next thing you heard was Padme's passing. Nothing was ever mentioned about the baby. Youd like to say things seemed to quiet down after that but it was only a month or so after padme's funeral that palpantine was executed by Anakin. And the new galaxy order began. Your once master was now the emperor, he ruled with an iron fist and hunting of jedi began. Black robed inquisitors scoured the galaxy looking for force sensitive beings to eradicate. It was a genocide.

Youd managed to hide quietly in your little home, holding down a job in the mines, mineing crytals and gem stones. Your reason was if your below ground you cant be spoted. Occasionally youd feel your old master, his life force brushing yours lightly. As if he was checking in on you. Reassuring himself you were still alive.

Sometimes youd sit and meditate trying to severe the connection between the two of you. His response was immediate and ruthless, he'd plough through your mind pressing back harshly, clawing and burning your mind makeing you cry out. It felt as if he were splitting your head open, searing pains would almost cause you to pass out. Just as you felt your vision blackening he'd pull back leaving a lingering sense of disapproval. A warning of not to try that again. For what ever reason he wanted to remain connected to you.

You guessed it had been just over four days since being thrown into your tiny cold cell. Four days of traveling to maker knows where, with little rest and no food bar a slice of bread and cup of water a day. Sleep had evaded you most of the nights, you were far too cold. And what little sleep you did get was haunted by nightmares. Scenarios of a slow grusome torture and bloody end waking you with a terrified cry. And they werent unfounded, the inquisitors and guards made sure you heard their guesses arohnd your fate. From what you could tell theyxd had specific orders to capture you. No one else, you were the only prisoner on the ship. A highly prized lamb ready for slaughter.

Suddenly the doors were flung open and you were unceremoniously dragged from your tiny cell. Two storm troopers heaved you up by your arms threatening to dislocate them as you almost collapsed, knees buckling after staying still for so long. With harsh shpving and a few curses you were being tugged from the ship. Your panic rose with each step as you realised you were probably being taken to your death. Marching out into the hanger and then quickly ushered into a huge yet quiet building. You had no chance to devidse and escape plan or even figure out where you were.

Within mineuts you were placed outside of two huge doors. The stormtroopers releasing you only to flank you either side, blasters at the ready. You frowned eyeing them and then to tall door once more.

"In there rebel! Now" the tropper to your left ordered with a hard shove to your back sending you into a stagger. You caught your footing just as the door began to open.

"Move it!" The other male barked coralling you into the huge dark room. You shivered feeling more unesy as you spied the room, inching forward. It was dark, the only light was one long pipe surrounding the room, currently set to dim white. Not even bright enough to creat a shdow on the black gloss floor.

You stepped further into the black cautiously, feeling more vulnerable then you ever hd before. Your lightsaber had been stolen by the inquisitors tht hd captured you, you felt nked and alone without it. Not that you carried it around, it hd been tucked away in your home. Yet this was the type of situation you missed having it clipped to your belt.

"It has been a long time padawan" you tensed hearing the voice of your once master. It was upseting, your guts twisting uncomfortably. Youd never thought you would hear him again and honestly? It was something you were all to happy to avoid. It was awkward and confusing. The lights suddenly came to life, illuminating the room and revealed a large black and grey space. Columns lined the walls, the gloss floor had n oddly intricate pattern inlaid into it, a mix of geometric and flowing shapes all defined by their gloss, matte and satin finish. One long glossed gangway directed you stright to the end of the room only interrupted by a set of wide sprawling shllow steps.

It was at that point you realised you were in the fabled throne room of the new sith empire. Shit. Not many left this place outside of a box.

Your eyes rose, following the room to the focal point. A huge black granite slab fashioned into a large masculine throne of straight sharp edges. Finally your gze landed on him. God. He was exactly the same, slightly weathered look to him, taller and slightly more muscular then he had been before. The only real changes were the way he'd matured into a stronger jawline and his eyes were a bright glowing amber. Youd say gold but the hint of orange tipped his gaze in to a more sinister hue.

"I heard you fled the order before i returned. Its unfortunate i wished you had stayed there i was coming to collect you, you know" he paused analysing you for a moment. There was a hesitance to his movments he shifted in his seat leaning to one side on his throne, resting on his elbow, hands clasped casually over his abdomen and his legs spread. You released a breath relaxing somewhat as he lounged back into a non threatening stance in his seat.

"But then again obi wan was always interfering. Im sure he convinced you id abandoned you. It wounds me to think youd hve belived him" your masters voice was acompanied by a deep sigh. His eyes almost looked hurt by the notion. You got the feeling your silence was beginning to grate on him. You could feel the tendrils of frustration creeping aroudn you, his force signature becoming restless around him he was irritated. Irritation to anger and then? Well he wasnt exactly known for tempering his rage.

"I didnt; he didnt say that" you inched forward nervously glancing up at him on the raised black dais his throne sat uppon. His eyes widened, surprize washing over his face, chasing away the brewing scowl.

"Oh? Then why did you flee?" His head tipped forward, just like it had done with every question hexd ever posed to you. Just like that you felt like the young clumsy padawan youd once been. That all familiar teasing your master was known for. You knew from old times he wasnt asking because he didnt know the answer, he knew alright. He was testing you, waiting to see if you would lie to him or be honest.

Unlike others in the order you never lied to your master. You had to trust him, and he you. The more you revealed to him for safe keeping the more he had let you in. Even going as far to bring you home to his wife letting you join them for family meals and stay over in the spare bedroom. Yes youd gotten far with anakin by telling him the truth willingly, and youd not stop that now.

"He lied to me. They all did, they said you were dead but i... felt you. And then it raised other questions about the order, i didnt understand why they were so eager to get rid of me. I couldnt stay anymore when they were so brazen about it" you explained clearly, trying not to babble away and trail off into your confused nonsense.

"Then you are lucky little one, to have seen the truth before it was too late. But then again you were always one for difficult questions. Your veiws on the dark side and the light always troubled the council." He chuckled to himself shaking his head recalling all the times your bombarded him with the why's and how's like a curious youngling thirsty for knowledge. At the time he'd explained everything in line with the jedi code as best as he could. But found himself having to shush you often as you continued to question the code and morals behinde it. He was somewhat proud of you for it, you refused to follow blindly, much like him. You didnt see life as cut and dry as others raised in the temple, in a way anakin was lucky.

"What? They knew?" You anounced curseing yourself at the fear that washed over you. Anakin drew a deep breath, his jaw locking as he felt the fear in you, the sickening twisting in your gut at the thought of those jedi ever scaring you. He opened the bond you both shared smothering you with soft reassurance. Calming you with a blanket of his own force coiling around you just as he had when you would panic alone in your bunk at night. He dreads to think how many times he'd stayed up at night soothing you waiting for you to drift off to sleep before resting himself.

He smirked, despite your initial shock and gasp at his gentle reassurance your own life force welcomed him like an old freind. His smug grin softened when you relaxed into his invisible embrace choosing to ignore all the current circumstances and just accept some comfort, for comforts sake.

"They would call me and obi wan in to discuss it. Your beliefs over useing the dark side for the greater good troubled them a great deal. They even suggested takeing you from me. Wanting to place you with a stricter master." He explained gently, savouring the momentary peace you were allowing him. He didnt want to be at logger heads with you, or for you to fear him. You werent his enemy, and never will be. He loved you, he wanted you to know that.

"It created a great deal of tension between obi wan, the council and myself. I wouldnt let them have you. Your mine and mine alone and i fought to keep you that way. I think deep down they knew i wanted to keep you no matter my path" he soothed you, he needed you to know he had defended you. Fought for you, he had your back no matter what the council said, no matter what his own former master said. He shifted in his set uncomfortably before grunting and rose to his feet.

"So them anouncing my death before they'd even faced me is just another manipulation. They chased you out of the order not to protect you but out of fear. You frightened them little one, your a free thinker they believed once they chased you off and killed me it would protect their precious order." He sneered slowly decending the stairs as he spoke. None of them could see how special you were in the order. They were ignorant.

"Wont you come closer? Id like to see how youxve grown" he spoke after a moment of silence, beckoning you forward to him. He was eager to reunite with you properly.

You steeled yourself and approched him slowly trying to figure out just how much danger you were in. Or if any? It was disconcerting, to look at him he was the same master you knew and loved, the same man youd run to with all your problems and questions. The same person you trusted with your life, the one whod slapped you upside the head when you were getting ahead of yourself.

Yet he was completely different?

He nolonger masked his presence, he felt dangerous and slick. Like oil ready to ignite. He stood tall with no shame or hesitation. There was nothing about him that let you think he wasnt in total control. His eyes though. You couldnt stop glancing at them, they were haunting.

"Not by much i see, still a pipsqueek. Oh Come now, move closer im not going to harm you" he teased your small stature, as he often did. And then sighed beckoning you again whilst stepping towards you himself giving little room for argument. Finally he stood before you and smiled scoffing to himself befor reaching out to you, brushing his hands across your shoulders and straightening your clothing that was still skewed from your rough handling by the troopers.

"Your filthy. But then again why wouldnt you be all those years in the mines" he mused shaking his head at you. You nodded still trying to figure him out. He wasnt shoutingnor attacking you, he seemed well normal? Like nothing had happened and you hadnt been hiding from him and his empire for the past five years of so.

"I should have known, you always were drawn to shiny gems. A collection of crystals hidden under your bed." His face lit up playfully as yours paled again, the panic of being caught settling over you, and slight disappointment.

"You knew?" Your tiny question tore a laugh from him and he patted your shoulders squeezing lightly. It was just like his mischievous padawan to belive she could hide things from him. Not to say it was easy for him to uncover your little collection. He'd found it by mistake after having to carry you to your own bed after a taxing mission left you sleeping like the dead on the flight home. He'd accidentally kicked a small box under your bed and investigated the rattle.

"Of course i did. I knew everything about you my little padawan. I even added to your collection once or twice" he admitted with a smirk watching as your eyes widened in realisation.

"That was you?" Your eyes followed him as he rounded you stopping beside you and slung his arm around your shoulders tucking you against his side. You melted into him, your force coiling around him, tugging at his. It was like youd gone soo long since having this type of comfort you needed to make up for lost time.

He reciprocated taking every opportunity he could to reconnect with you. He wanted to prove so much in such a small amount of time. He wanted you to realise he was free to dote on you, neither of you had to hold back you were allowed to feel now. The simple fact you were already seeking him out soke volumes about how much your abrupt separation had affected you.

"Indeed, i see nothing wrong with treating you to a few gifts for a job well done. As much as the jedi claimed to abide by the code they all had there own forbidden possessions." He quickly moved on, wanting you to know youd ultimatly made the right decision. No one in the order followed all of the rules, they were all hypocrites to some extent. It had always been do as i say not as i do, he wished he'd noticed sooner. The pain and fear he and padme had lived in all those years was unnecessary, everyone head their own exceptions.

"Windu had a small collection of books, obi wan found his own work around; food. Treating himself and others to delicious meals. You had your shiny jewels and i" he stopped himself for a moment giving you a moment to process the betrayals of your ex-superiors. But also pondering if this was the right time to plant a seed in your mind. He had plans. Big plans, plans that would change both of your futures.

You looked at him expectantly, your brow furrowing as you took him in, waiting for him to finish. It was nerve-wracking he'd always been unpredictable. And for him to hesitate over his next words was unsettling.

"I had you and padme. We were tiny but fullfilling family nonetheless" you blinked up at him. What? His smiled grew and he squeezed you to him once more before dropping his head a d pressing a chaste kiss on your hair line. You frowned confused by his claim.

Did he? Did he really feel that you and padme were his exception? That you both belonged to him? In sime fucked up way you did, well you had done. You were his pupil, he could train and punish you as he saw fit, take you to the front lines or confine you to the temple. But as much as you loved him as a brother youd never ever dreamt he felt the same, even though he clearly loved padme and obi wan. You just hadnt thought you were another of his loved ones.

"Were not family" the muttered words were out before you could even think on the consequences. Images of him suddenly crushing you with the force, choking or punishing you for disagreeing with him flooded you. You winced, jerking away expecting him to react violently just like the rumours said. But he didnt instead he, tipped his head down to you, looking at you curiously from the top of his eyes and rose a brow.

"No? Are you sure about that little one?" He cooed down at you teasingingly.

"Well i mean... i err Y-yes; technically we arnet? Well... not now?" You fumbled, mixing your words whilst loo,ing away, your gaze dropping to the floor uncomfortably. It was hard holding his gaze, it was different. The harsh reality of him being a sith was daunting. Seeing really was believing, but he was still your old master. In a way it was frightening to think of how close he was to the darkside when he was training you, when you trusted him; loved him even!

"Then we should do something bout that shouldnt we?" He uttered smoothing your hair from your face tucking it behinde your ear. He froze for a second and then frowned.

"You? Whats this? Your braid is gone" his fingers dived further in to your hair feeling around for the braid he had gifted you alongside his tutelage all those years ago. Once realising it was no longer there he scowled at you, amber eyes searing into your own demanding an explanation.

"i had to get rid of it, people knew what it meant. It was dangerous to keep" you shrugged whislt crossing your fingers holing that he didnt get offended and start lecturing you about it. I mean what did he expect? It was open season on jedi, of course youd got rid of the braid. Thats not to say it was an easy thing to do, to your shame youd cried as you unwove it. Youd watched in the mirror as fat tears rolled down your cheeks, and a bottle of strong spirit standing by to pick up the pieces.

Despite the way everything had happened and his quick descent into the dark side you couldnt help mourn the loss of your braid, it symbolised your entire, lifes work, sacrifice. Youd endured the temple and its teachings. Earned your braid and became a padawan to an amazing powerful man and was well on your way to becoming a knight. And just like that it had to go, everything youd worked for was pulled out from under you.

Your feelings must has crept through your bond, bitter sadness and loathing, regret and guilt entwined int one hard cold mass in your chest. Life was much cruler then you cpuld have imagined. Anakin took a moment to watch you, his force carefully peaking into you coaxing you to share more of your inner conscious with him. It saddened him to see just how much youd lost in the turning of the tides. Youd both lost what you held dear, and although he couldnt regain everything that had been ripped from him, he was adamant that hexd restore as much as he could to his beloved pupil.

"Turn around" he ordered before curling his fingers around your arms and spun you around faceing away from him.

"What? Ah!? Master! Wait no!" You bit your lip cutting off the rest of your complaint. Your face flushed as you called him by his old title. He wasnt your master, not anymore. Not since the rise of the empire! How could you slip up like that. Hes the karking emperor now!

If he noticed tour little blunder he chose not to tease you for it, instead he battled your flaying arms and squirmong with swift swats you your head grunting, huffing down at you as you struggled against him.

"For kriff sake! Will you hold still pipsqueek!?" He cursed out loud before striking the back of your head harder then before, letting you feel his growing frustration. You yipped at the slap and tensed for a moment.

"No- let go, hey? What are you doing?" You cried out after a few seconds trying to tug away from him, spining to face him only to yelp again as this time i stead of a palm to the side of your head there was a harsh tug on your hair from behind your right ear.

"Hold still otherwise i will end up ripping a chunk of hair from your scalp. Then youll have a bald spot" He chided giving another harder pull jerking your head to face forward again. You whined moving your hands to pull at his wrists feeling him fiddling with a length of hair. But your hands were stopped at the last moment. Anakins force looped around your wrists and snapped them back down to your sides squeezing in reprimand before releasing them.

"You were never this fussy before" he muttered to himself as he continued to concentrate of the small patch of hair, expertly twisting it neatly, just like the first time.

"What are you doing?"

"Replacing your braid padawan. I do not like seeing you without it" he huffed quickly, makeing sure to be carefull with his words. He knew yoh well enough, youd never admit to missing the single braid. So he would take the metaphorical fall for it. If he said it was for his sake then your more likely to accept it. Contrary to what you belived in this moment he knew youd do anything for him still. The warmth in your force and calm neediness was enough for him to know you still cared for him, just as he did you.

"But im; thats a jedi thing! We're not jedi! Your not my master, your sith!"you grunted waving your arms around once more only to hiss as the hit and invisible wall that stopped you from reaching back to your hair. You pouted shaking out your fingers, rubbing your now tender knuckles.

"Says the girl who just called me her master? Will you hold still?Honestly where has my good girl gone?" He asked pointedly, sending you a small whisper of amusement through the force as to not frighten you into thinking he was displeased. He had to tread carefully, you were still wary of him. If he had any hope or rekindling this relationship and possibly seeking more then kinship he had to be perceptive to your own mood.

"Probably in the mines pocketing the clear points" you huffed under your breath, still sulking. Anakin bellowed a laugh at that. It really was like old times. Just like he hoped for, not that he wanted togoback to. How things were before, but he had missed being treated like a person rather then an authoritarian entity. But his humanity was only for the likes of you to experience. Everyone else could get karked.

"The jedi may be dead, but that doesnt mean i cant borrow some of their ideas. The padawan braid has always been a symbol of domination, hierarchy. Protection." You gave a small hum in agreement, nodding gently before remebering he was braiding your hair.

"I thought you hated it though? The rules and symbolism stuff?" You pondered out loud trying to make sense of the man. He hated the structure and classes. Everyone in their own box unable to argue of explore anything outside of their designated fields.

"It has taken a while but even i can appreciate the notion of protecting something" you nodded along with him, unsure if it was because you agreed with him or if you just wanted to hurry up and get all this weirdness over with.

"There we go, all mine again padawan. Its much better now dont your think?" His hand glided over the much longer braid, admiring the simplicity of it, honestly seeing you wear the thin braid made his heart swell with a possessive pride. Eventually he tore his eyes away from the symbolic strands,stepping around you dragging the braid forward for you to see before letting it drop to your chest.

"Im not a padawan anymore" your eyes locked onto the braid for a second, lighting up in excitement despite your mild complaint. He coukd feel the instant attachment from you, and mild distaste. It would seem you were uneasy about having such reactions to somthing that had been so sentimental in the past.

Anakin eyed you for a moment and then reached out tucking the braid behinde your shoulder again. It would take some time for things to go back to the way they were, he wouldnt let you dwell on it. You needed to move on with him, join him in his freedom. He didnt move away from you. Instead he cupped your cheek softly, coaxing you to look him in the eye, and began to speak sincerly.

"Perhaps not in the way you used to be. But you are still mine, you always have been. Our connection is absolute with or without you braid. Ah! No, dont you dare. Thats not an invitation to remove it. I will singe it at the root with my saber if you try to remove it a second time" he scolded quickly slapping at your hands at the rose to your hair trying to find the braid he'd just weaved. You whined dropping your hands to your sides as they smarted from the swift stinging rebuke.

"Now i think its about time you got cleaned up and some actual rest. Your dark circles are ridiculous" he instructed crowding you again turning with you and began directing you to an arch set back slightly hidden from veiw by thick a pillar. A passage way to the right of the dias and throne.

"Wha; bathed and bed? I dont... i dont understand arent you just going to kill me? Or or arrest me or somthing?!" You jerked away hastily, almost stumbbling over as you spun around dramatically. Even after the strange calm happiness youd seemed to give one another you were technically on opposite sides of the force. You were unable to truly belive he only had the best intentionsfor you.

"Absolutely not, why would i do that?" Indignat fury washed over his face, setting it into a scowl. His arms crossed over his chest, hands tucking themselves into the crook of his arms as if staving off reaching for you once more.

"Isn't that what youve done to everyone else who escaped the temple, erradicate or interrogate them" your voice carried an urgency. Frightfull and desperate. Your fear of being interrogated and killed spewing like venom on your tongue. He rolled his eyes shifting on his feet before a sardonic smile crossed his features.

"You are different, dont ever put yourself into the same pathetic status as them. And i know you know nothing bout the others stragglers, you think ive not been rooting around that headmof yours?" His announcement irked you somewhat. Sure it was a possibility but for him to out right say he'd been helping himself to your inner thoughts was a whole other dilemma. For two reasons mainly, one did you actually trust him when he admits to such invasions of privacy and two how in the hell did you not notice? Where you really that rusty? Or was this a sith only trick the amber eyes granted you?

"You... you what?" Anakin drew a deep sigh, as much as he wanted to be irritated by your outburst. Your squeeked words disarmed him. He forgot how adorable you could be when the wind was taken from your sails. You shrunk into this sweet vulnerable little thing.

"Sweet girl of course i've been flicking through your head to find information. You think our connection weakened because of our distance?" You squinted at him a sure sign of you thinking too hard, searching for a hidden riddle in his admission.

"Not at all, i always knew where you were. I simply let you enjoy your own life for a few years. But now i want you home again, i do not trust all of my inquisitors. And that silly little planet is one of the next ones to be.. investigated." He waved a hand through to air brushing off the notion of you becoming another victim of his empire. It was preposterous, he wouldnt even entertain your silly thoughts of being executed by reassuring you. Surely you knew he'd gaurd you with his life?

"So you... sent them to get me?" You uttered the question was more of an acusation rather than an actual question. You were just trying to be polite about it. And hold back the nausea and panic brewing within you.

"Yes, why wouldnt i? Your mine. We're family, we are all each other has left in the galaxy." His face softened he finally gave in reaching for you tugging you closer and resting his head against yours for a moment. It was too much for him to resist, yes hexd let you have a few years of freedom but he had missed you. You were the last person he truly cared about, the final piece to his empire. The only living soul he would have along side him. It would take time but soon youd grow to love him more then you once did.

"But they?" You huffed, voice trembling tears threatening to stain your face. You burrowed into him, breathing him in. Letting him nuzzle you sweetly. Youd never been this close to him, sure he yanked you out of the way of the odd laser or two and pinned you during sparring matches and training. But this was more intimate, this was actual affection. Anakin was holding you, hugging you letting you feel how much he cared. It was amazing to finally have something youd craved for so long. This was always forbidden, at the tempke you received the odd hug as a youngling but not very often, affection was taboo.

But even the affection didnt manage to chase away the overwhelming relief and fury swirling inside of you. Releived to find you wont be dieing anytime soon, but fury over the fear and anxiety youd had to go through to get here! It wasnt fair, youd truley belived you were going to be on the recieving end of a lightsaber, or shoved face first into a plasma turbine and have a painfull death consisting of dismemberment. Thats what the inquisitors and troopers had gossiped. Hushed whispers of being tortured and slaughtered. And youd belived them!

"They what?" The air grew cold around you both he leant back, his eyes glowing ominously. You could literally feel the wrath in him. The promise of vengeance and revenge should anything untoward had happened. But whether it was madness or spite you still answered his tumultuous question.

"They locked me up! In a freezing cell and? They made me think i was going to; that someone would torture me! Kill me! And they stole my saber!" You covered your mouth gasping, flushing when you realised you'd just tattled on them like a child. Anakin didnt even blink at the way youd quickly told on the asshats that had captured, imprisoned and scared the crap out of you.

"Then you will be happy to know those that were sent to return you to me are already dead. I wont have gossip about you in my forces. And your saber is perfectly safe, its being taken to my room as we speak. I didnt trust you not to cleave off some limbs before i got you home" his reply startled you. He'd what? He had killed for you? To keep you secret... you frowned as much as it should bother you it didnt. Well not much, your first thpught was 'no! why did he do that for you?' The second louder thought that crossed your mind was 'well good, they were assholes'. It struck you to the core, you should be scared, be horrified that your master hd done such a thing but no. You just felt confusion. It didnt make sense to you so much you couldnt help but ask him, you wanted to understand.

You also wanted to understand your relief when hed anou ced he had your lightsaber. Because honestly? You lightsaber in the hands of a sith isnt normally something that'd calm you. It was a troubling realisation. Despite everythingnyou still held Anakin in high regard.

"Home? This isnt; I dont... i dont understand" you frowned up at him, your voice growing small and unsure. You grew more confused with each statment he made. Was he keeping you here? Did he expect something from you? Was he going to recruit you, give you responsibilities?

"Everything will be fine. Soon youll understand, i have high hopes for us. Our future has never been brighter little one. You'll see soon enough. But for now we will take our time, reacquaint ourselves" he uttered cryptically stepping back from you smoothing his hands over your shoulders. As excited as he was, now was not the time to overwhelm you. He was patient, he will slowly ease you into your new role. Draw you closer and closer, higher and higher untill you took your place beside him. Youd be his empress in no time. He was sure of it. But first he had to rekindle your trust, then he could seduce you.

"Future? What are you going to start training me again? Do you need an apprentice or something?" You pondered wareily, you knew tht sith training was different from jedi, you werent necessarily trained. The master would just anwser your questions, when you asked the right ones that is. But in all honestly you didnt want ny training , or fighting. You simply wanted to live your life, preferably without fear or condemnation.

Anakin shook his head and slipped along side you, capturing your hand before placing it in the crook of his arm before setting off once more. Heading you towards the side exit again.

"Hush.Once you trust me again we can revisit the topic of our new path. For now relax, enjoy your freedom about the palace. You can do as you please inside these walls, have all the pretty gems and polished stones your heart desires." The final teasing words felt odd, he wasnt baiting you but there was a sincerity there. Youd never notice it was infact a subtle manipulation. A well placed temptation solely there to lure you out of your old padwan mentally. He didnt want you to see him as your master, nor did he want you to revert to your old ways and place such limits on yourself again. He wanted you to grow attched to him, to rely on him, to seek him out and enjoy the freedom he'd granted you. but above all he wanted you to fall for him. And it would be hard not to if he gave you everything youd ever wished for.

"Be a good girl for me? Go get cleaned up and straight to bed i will see you in the morning. And remember leave that braid alone, id hate to have to reprimand you so early on" it took a little more then two minutes to exit the throne room. There was a droid waiting by the door expectantly.

"Escort her to the chambers i prepared in my private wing. Shes to bathe, eat and get some sleep. No one is to disturb her" Anakin eased your hand from his arm whislt delivering orders to the droid. You made to argue, still determined to have some answers, preferably less vague. But he hushed you with a motion of his hand and then leant forward tugging you in for another tight hug, squeezing you to hos chest unable to deny his impulses.

"Do as ive asked, rest. I shall see you in the morning for breakfast. Untill then pipsqueek" his whispered low, his breath tickeling the sensitive shell of your ear drawing an involuntary shudder from you. And then he parted from you. Leaving you with a sweet kiss on your cheek before turning on his heel and making his way back towards the throne.

You stood frozen, rooted to the spot lifting a hand to your cheek grazing the spot he'd kissed. Your heart fluttering in your chest and cheeks red. That was new. Suddenly your veiw of your master was interrupted by the service droid instrucing you to follow them deeper into the palace. You nodded stiffly your feet keeping pace with the droid. But did chance a final glance to the emperor as he took his place on the huge throne. Sparing you a single smoldering look as your turned a corner out of sight.

He definitely had a plan, yet you wasnt sure if you feared it. Infact your all to happy to remain here quietly if it meant youd be safe, sheltered and fed well. Despite all of the tragidies within the empire and the heavy handed rule of Anakin your only personal concern was that youd be hunted and killed. It was clear that was no longer the case. It seemed selfish and you did feel somewhat guilty but maybe you could just relax for a while? Enjoy some security and good food and comfy beds. You can overthink and agonise over your moral compass later, when your not filthy, tired and hungry.

#oh for fic sake fics #anakin x fem reader #anakin x reader #emperor!Anakin #suitless vader #darth vader x reader

[loustat-0]

Here's the reasons why I don't connect well with Loumand in the book :

So one of them is because Louis never even once admitted to Lestat or Claudia so ruthlessly that he loved Lestat and suddenly with Armand he became more free in love & more open , I don't think it was because Armand listened to him or understood him better because there are some parts of iwtv book where Lestat was capable of those yet Louis thought it was manipulation 🙄 . Why didn't he ever think the same about Armand ? 😏 The answer is simple because Armand didn't exactly shown his mind powers to Louis yet . And even when he told Louis he did that & he used it on Louis to make him turn Madeline Louis still forgave him ??? And just asked not to do it again ! And Armand didn't do it ? 😏 What makes us sure he didn't ? Cause there are two sentences which showed he most probably did use it again . 1. " Go to sleep Louis " after Louis burnt the theater & wanted to escape Paris & 2. When he admitted that when he heard Lestat survived he said this :

While it is true that Armand might have kept the fact that Lestat was alive from Louis to protect him it is also worth mentioning Armand does many manipulative things to help the people he loved too . Armand is able to read anyone's mind & if he had read Louis's he must've known if Lestat being alive will make Louis feel anything or not , right ? And why didn't he tell Lestat about Louis being alive ? 😏 What was he protecting Lestat from ? Other than the fact that if he knew he would probably do whatever he could to find Louis again & talk to him & they would probably leave Armand again & get back together ? 😬 So no it wasn't all about protecting Louis from himself or anyone it was for himself too .

All I can think of is how numb Louis became when Claudia died & Armand & Louis kinda fell apart & just lived together because there were no other vampires who would accept them & they were both afraid of being alone & not finding anyone who could love them again as they once loved each other . In my opinion they practically stayed together out of desperation for not being alone & for Louis because he didn't have anyone else to lean on as powerful as Armand . And Armand was emotionally so obsessed with Louis & he couldn't end it easily.

Armand tried to make Louis separated with Claudia a lot he wanted Louis for himself & he didn't want to share him which in the book Lestat never tried to do . And then he orchestrated a whole show to get rid of Claudia & make Louis believe Lestat was responsible for her doom 🙄 although poor Claudia was already doomed because of Lestat's selfishness of making someone so young but let's not forget that they punished her for killing her maker & one of their kind . Another attempt of Armand to separate Louis & Lestat & let's not forget did Louis ever actually ask himself if Lestat was still in the theater or not when he burnt it down ? Yes He didn't even care at that moment he was angry & he was mourning & that can make you not think of whatever you're doing at that moment . Because later when Louis said this :

Doesn't this indicate that Louis cared who was burnt in that theater ? He said I didn't really care I hadn't thought of Lestat at all the night I torched the theater . Isn't it weird to you that he thought of Santiago & Celeste but didn't really care about Lestat ? 🤔 And if he didn't then why did he burn Lestat with them ? He said he didn't hate him for Claudia's death . Don't you sense some mind power here ? 👀

And look what Louis said about Lestat being alive : I cannot convey to you the feeling that came over me when I heard this .

I mean what does that say ? Why does Louis say this ?

And one more thing if Lestat had escaped the theater who helped him escape ? He didn't escape in fact Armand had taken him again to the tower 😏 .

4. Finally this is why I don't like book Loumand . No hate on AMC Loumand what so ever because I haven't seen anything from them but if the show runners want to do the books they have to at least notice one of these flaws & voids in Louis & Armand's relationship as much as they did in Louis & Lestat's relationship . 😉

#iwtv speculation #iwtv spoilers #the vampire chronicles #loustat #loumand #armandstat #lesmand #interview with the vampire #iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #lestat de lioncourt #armand the vampire #the vampire armand #amc iwtv #iwtv 2022

[altocat]

Um. Long essay ahead, sorry lol.

We are talking about the Genesis-Sephiroth drama and I must say: Genesis is so very human and I love that. I think he seriously thought that Seph needed to hear some cold, harsh truth to finally see why Shinra sucked and why he and Angeal had defected. So, he just went straight for Seph’s most painful issue—his mother and the answers regarding her. 

I know we react viscerally to the idea of Gen having known about Seph searching for his mother and then weaponizing that, but think about it. Angeal is dead by that point and Genesis is on the verge of death. He is desperate. The man is broken to pieces after discovering that his entire existence had been a lie, an experiment, an abuse of power, etc., and that his own adoptive parents had “betrayed” him. He basically was reduced to an orphan that discovered how awful his care-takers were and how they had used him. 

On top of all this, he lost Angeal, his closest childhood friend, to the SAME horrific downfall. I don’t think we talk enough about how Angeal’s death probably messed with Gen, but I feel that he gets noticeably crueler and frailer afterwards. Shinra took everything from those boys, and Gen’s last hope for any salvation was Sephiroth, who was STILL letting himself be under Shinra’s command. Genesis absolutely wanted to hurt him with a wakeup call and went for the heart with his dagger. 

He probably thought he was doing well, that Sephiroth needed it, and yes, a strain of bitterness from their past rivalry tainted his words, but wasn’t it all just forgivable drivel in the face of their deeper friendship? In the end, Sephiroth could overlook that after seeing the light, yes?

Genesis wasn’t an idiot. He really did believe Sephiroth would help him despite the rude awakening, but what he lacked was deeper insight and empathy for his old friend. 

Genesis had a normal chldhood. He understood family, he understood the idea of a “hometown,” he knew how to hold friends and have fun with his life—he had autonomy despite the lies surrounding his birth. Sephiroth had absolutely none of this throughout his life and had trusted his heart only to his friends—one of whom was dead by that point and the other seemingly a traitor who appeared to use his greatest weakness against him before demanding a part of his very essence. Sephiroth had nothing left in that moment.

Genesis did truly descend into his frenzied, imagined glory-tale of three friends that were all monsters and could save themselves together, thinking that he had a chance to full-fill that dream, but he made the mistake of underestimating Sephiroth’s crumbling mental stability as a human being. We saw what discovering the truth did to two kids that grew up fairly normal. It ruined them, killed them, made one of them cruel in many ways. Gen and Angeal suffered immensely believing they were monsters and eventually reshaped pieces of history in retaliation.

But Sephiroth? The “other” child of Shinra? The solitary one? The one that had been violated directly from the womb…not just through his mother’s cells…but from the time his own life force began to take shape? The one that had been raised to be a killing machine with no true connection to the outside world? His discovery of the truth broke his psyche and led to apocalyptic events. 

Genesis simply failed to consider this, so his “splash of cold water” mixed with his own bitterness, which would have been cruel enough under normal circumstances, actually led to extremely dark consequences. I absolutely believe he knew that Sephiroth had been searching for his mother for his whole life, that Sephiroth had indicated it or brought it up at some point during their youth, regardless of whether the picture was involved or not.

I absolutely think Genesis weaponized Sephiroth’s gaping wound in that area, but I don’t think he realized how damaging it would truly be. He forgot that his friend was not at all “normal” and that his orphanhood was a different entity—something colder and more feral than most. Even most orphans are not completely deprived of normal lives and raised as weapons. We see this with many other characters. So many that lost their families or never knew them still found a way to make a place for themselves in the world or substitute their loss with something else.

Sephiroth literally could not do this as Shinra’s weapon. He had tried with his two friends and lost them both. He was already collapsing under the weight of it all, and Genesis simply did not see it in time. So, he played with fire and paid the price. That look of hurt on his face when Seph rejects him is genuine and raw and real. He had faith in them, in their friendship, and thought that it could withstand a bit of turmoil like it had in the past—but that only could have maybe been the case if Sephiroth had not been who he was—if he had been normal.

Genesis never quite fully understood his hero in the end and it makes me so fucking sad.

I don't think I could have said it better myself. Amazing analysis.

Genesis is a severely misunderstood character. It's really easy to dismiss him without taking a closer look at his feelings and motives. I think there was plenty of bitterness towards Seph, but we all seem to forget that Genesis' deepest, dearest desire at the end of the day was to share the apples with Sephiroth in a moment of acknowledgement. Genesis hurt Sephiroth badly, but there's more layers to it than just petty rivalry and Genesis being terrible just for the sake of it.

#asks #ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy 7 #crisis core #sephcanons #sephiroth #genesis rhapsodos #angeal hewley #final fantasy

[quotergirl19]

Colin’s perspective:

Colin would have said anything to get Lord Fife and those men to change the subject and leave him alone. He didn’t want the ton or anyone to distract him from the happiness that he felt after his triumph. He had succeeded in protecting Penelope and her family from Lord Featherington and it was the best moment of his life, the relief he had seen on Penelope’s face when they danced, her trust, her admiration. He felt like he was finally a man, finally in control of his life, respected and capable. And they were ruining it.

These men with their comments and questions about how he’d said he had sworn off all women this season but how he certainly had not sworn off the youngest Featherington girl. The one who was often in the company of his scandalous sister. They didn’t even know her name. They had smirks on their faces as if they were amused for some reason, it felt like they were mocking him and he didn’t like it.

What was so amusing about his friendship with Penelope? She was a good person, she was encouraging and kind and he’d helped her. He helped her entire family by discovering her cousins scheming and ridding the ton of him for good. But one thing was certain, this wasn’t the time for the attention of the ton to be focused on Penelope or her family. The irony of the fact that they were the hosts of the ball the entire ton was currently attending was not lost on him but, it would be best if the whole of London society were focused on the event and not the family hosting it.

Colin thought the best course of action would be to dismiss their curiosity and change the subject. So he flippantly said he would never dream of courting her. He did not stop to think about the sour pit in his stomach when they laughed at what he’d said. Because it sounded like they were mocking Penelope and she didn’t deserve that. Not sweet Pen, she’d been so surprised and grateful for his help. She’d said he was special to her and she had never looked so lovely to him than in that moment.

Courting Penelope. Colin had never even considered it and then it was being suggested by a mocking group of men whom he knew had no intentions of marrying any time soon, or if they did, theirs would be marriages of duty for connections and dowries and heirs… he could not talk to those men, not about the sort of marriage he wanted. Because Colin had always known that he wanted a love match like his parents and his sister Daphne had. He wanted to make a family with a wife who understood him, who respected and was good to him. Not that Pen would make a bad wife but, Pen was his friend. He was not courting her. He was not courting anyone. Not after what happened with Marina. No.

Suddenly Colin felt as though he was thrust right back to the days just after Whistledown had announced he had been fooled. Marina may have been acting out of desperation and need but she had still lied to him and nearly trapped him in a fraud of a marriage. Penelope would never have been so calculating. She was far too good. Pen would never have made him a spectacle the way Whistledown had. He couldn’t bear this, this feeling of self doubt that plagued him since then. He hated being thought of as a boy, mocked and foolish and… he needed to be away from these people. Colin decided right then and there that he was not ready to be amongst society yet. He would arrange a trip first thing in the morning and get away. He never thought to tell Pen, and so he had simply left on his travels. By the time it had dawned on him that he might have left when she and her family needed him close to ensure Lord Featherington departed without incident, he was across an ocean.

Having realized that he might have left Penelope at the worst possible time, he wrote to her to explain but she never replied. It was not like Pen to ignore his correspondence. It must be because of the way her mother had caught them alone. He had not thought about it at the time but Penelope was a lady and unmarried, and proper etiquette did not permit for them to be alone unchaperoned, or even for them to be corresponding the way they had in the past. So he decided to cut his travels short and head back to town. He might ignore the ton as often as possible but he would be there for Penelope if she needed him.

Nothing could have prepared Colin for the cold reception he received when he called on Penelope upon his return. She was like a different person. She was distant and would not meet his eyes when they spoke and he could swear that when she saw him, she was trying to avoid him entirely. He hated it. Why was she treating him this way? His mother had informed him that Eloise and Penelope had not spoken in months which was even more peculiar. Something was very wrong with Penelope and Colin was determined to set things right. He missed her, his friend who he trusted and relied upon for encouragement and understanding. Home was not home without her presence and it was unsettling how much her absence was consuming his every thought. Having her within reach and yet so very far away left him with an aching loneliness that he had never felt before.

That night at a party, Colin overheard Cressida Cowper cruelly mocking Penelope for yet again wearing an unflattering yellow gown. Calling Pen as appealing as a spoiled lemon. And he watched as Penelope stood there poised as ever and someone behind him said that was the one Colin Bridgerton had at Featherington ball before announcing he would never court her. That was when he realized that in his eager haste to rid the ton of Lord Featherington, he had caused the ton to believe he had compromised her. Penelope was ruined and enduring constant insults and mistreatment while he’d been off traveling without a care in the world. No wonder she would not see him. How could that not come between his sister and her best friend. Colin had taken Penelope by the hand in front of the entire ton with the Queen herself in attendance and they likely thought it was his revenge for their complicity in Marina’s scheme.

Colin would make it right. If he could not convince the ton that the rumors they believed were nothing but lies and help them to see that Penelope Featherington was one of the finest, kindest and most remarkable young ladies that London had to offer, if he could not secure her a good match this season, he would court her properly and marry her himself. He owed her that much. He had promised her that he would always protect her and he would. Because Penelope was special to him, she was his friend and he needed to ensure her happiness if he was ever going to have a chance of knowing any happiness himself.

#quotergirl mini fic #bridgerton #Colin Bridgerton #Penelope Featherington #polin #penelope x colin #colin x penelope #she fell first he fell harder #friends to lovers #bridgerton season 3 expectations

[canadianlucifer]

Yeah okay I'll finally make a post on my latest Takizawa headcanon bc ever since I made the connection I couldn't stop thinking about it.

In short, I think he probably has npd, or narcissistic personality disorder.

Now I wanna make it clear I'm not a professional, I'm not giving any diagnosis or anything here, this is just what I've observed through his behaviour and how I think it fits the criteria.

I'm going to be mostly focused on his human character, might bring up a point or two from :re, but it's just gonna be the good brown haired boy for the most part.

Going through the list in the DSM-V, first is: a grandiose sense of self-importance (exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)

We first see this when he criticises Juuzou for eating in the meeting room and not listening to him because he's older. He's not proven himself to be actually superior, but he believes he is.

And again later when he's jealous Juuzou gets to go on the Aogiri raid and he's left behind to do paperwork.

Second piece is preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.

Now, we don't exactly ever see him like, just sitting there thinking about being promoted or whatever, but it is known that he desperately wants one.

Third is believing that they are "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)

I don't have any solid proof or screenshots for this one, but it stands to reason that this is likely why he joined the CCG in the first place. Investigators are strong and "special", and we never see him interact with people who aren't investigators outside of Hide, who he really only seems to vent to, someone he probably doesn't see as an "equal"

Fourth, requiring excessive admiration.

Again, no solid proof, but he often seems desperate for praise for his work and to be recognized.

Fifth is a sense of entitlement (unreasonable expectations of especially favourable treatment or automatic compliance with their expectations)

See point 1, he feels entitled to Juuzou's compliance and to go on the raid.

Now, point six, being interpersonally exploitative (taking advantage of others to achieve their own ends), I don't think I've seen. At least, not as a human. In :re I can totally see him using Aogiri to eventually regain the CCG's trust as an example though.

Seven, lacking empathy (unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others), is a hard one.

The way I see it is that he sort of has empathy, but only for the attention. In one of the screenshots I added earlier he says he wants to get promoted so he can help people, but if we look at that statement through another lens, it could become "I want to help people so they thank and congratulate me"

Eight though, often being envious of others or believing that others are envious of them, hoo boy is he a jealous guy.

Like, I don't even need to say anything here, do I?

He is jealous of anyone better than him in anything and everyone around him knows it.

And finally, nine, showing arrogant, haughty behaviours or attitudes.

Again, when he wanted to go on the Aogiri raid, but this is most clearly seen as a ghoul to be honest. Especially :re volume 3, he's destroying squads with little apparent effort, fights Haise while making snarky remarks, and that monolouge he gives to those two investigators reads so much like "I'm better than you for having figured this out"

A few other things outside of the diagnostic criteria I would like to add is how he clearly has a strong hierarchy, like he views any investigators his rank or lower as below him and any investigators ranked above him as great

Something else is that narcissistic people often don't have high self esteem

And though he may talk big, it's clear he's not very confident about facing the Owl

These are just a few of my thoughts, definitely not everything, and it's not like he perfectly fits the criteria, but I just saw more traits in him than I didn't.

Just another headcanon of mine to add to the list

#tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul re #seidou takizawa #takizawa seidou #npd

[miguelswifey04]

fucked out (spider noir x gn! reader x miguel o’ hara)

summary: in this universe spider noir and miguel o’hara work side by side but you one day your caught their eye and they can’t get enough of you…they’ll show you just how much they want you after a mission.

warnings: smut, p in v sex, anal sex , oral sex, threesome

In the dark, gritty streets of New York City, Spider-Man Noir and Miguel O'Hara, also known as Spider-Man 2099, found themselves allies in a battle against the city's criminal underworld. Both possessing unique spider-like abilities, they fought side by side, their skills complementing each other in their pursuit of justice.

As time went on, their camaraderie grew stronger, their respect and admiration for each other deepening. It wasn't long before their alliance took a more intimate turn, fueled by a shared understanding of the dangerous lives they led. They found solace in each other, a connection that went beyond the spandex suits they wore.

One night, as they patrolled the city, they came across a dangerous gang, cornering innocent civilians. Together, they swung into action, effectively taking down the criminals one by one. When the dust settled, they realized they weren't alone.

There, caught in the midst of the chaos, was the you, a fellow spider-powered hero. With your unique abilities and fierce determination, you had joined the fight, unknowingly catching the attention of both Noir and Miguel.

Intrigued, both Spider-Men approached you, their eyes filled with admiration for your skills and courage. They recognized a kindred spirit in you, someone who understood their dual nature and the sacrifices it entailed.

“Impressive moves, Y/N," Miguel commented with a smirk, his gaze locked on them. "You handled those criminals like a seasoned pro."

Noir nodded in agreement, his voice deep and gruff. "You've got potential, darling. You've got the instincts of a true hero. We could use someone like you on our team."

Your heart raced at the prospect, having admired both Spider-Men from afar. "I'd be honored to fight alongside you," you replied, a certain fire burning in your eyes.

As your partnership grew, so did the bond between the three spider-powered heroes. You all trained together, honing your skills and pushing each other to new heights. But amidst the intense training sessions and thrilling battles, something unexpected happened—a deep and powerful attraction sparked between the three.

One night, the three of you found themselves alone in their secret hideout, their senses still heightened from their latest mission. The adrenaline pulsated through their veins, fueling the fire that burned between them. With a shared desire, they allowed their masks to fall, revealing their vulnerable and heated gazes.

Without hesitation, you stepped forward, capturing the attention of both Noir and Miguel. Their hands intertwined, their bodies drawn irrevocably closer, they embraced the allure that coursed through their veins. In a passionate and heated tangle, their lips crashed against each other's, tongues dancing in sync. The room filled with desperate moans and the sweet scent of desire. They both took their turns touching you and caressing you—listening to your pleas, being very obedient towards you. Noir had his mouth latched onto your breasts while Miguel buried his face in between your thighs, giving you those mind-blowing orgasms that just kept coming and coming. Noir’s cock plunged into your hole, stretching and filling you with each forceful thrust. His movements became fast and relentless, his hips meeting you with an urgency that bordered on primal. With every stroke, he could feel you opening up, accommodating his size and yearning for more.

Meanwhile, Miguel’s grip on your hips tightened as he delved into your tight ass. The sensation was exquisite, every inch of him enveloped in the slick tightness. He set a steady, relentless pace, his cock stretching you to your limits and beyond. The burn of pleasure mingled with the delicious friction, the intense sensation driving you further into a state of euphoria. You were so fucked out of your mind that your ears started ringing and your vision was blurring. Noir praised you making you feel beautiful while Miguel degraded you making you feel like a slut for him—how you’re getting both of your holes fucked, being so fucking greedy.

Your cries filled the room, your voice a symphony of pleasure and need. The combination of Noir’s penetrative force and Miguel’s unyielding grip pushed you closer to your ultimate desire, your bodies pulsing with a throbbing ache for satisfaction.

As the trio continued their passionate dance, they could sense your body giving way to the relentless pleasure. Your walls trembled, your senses heightened by the stretch and depth they craved. Each thrust brought them closer to the pinnacle of pleasure, their bodies becoming a conduit of desire and longing.

The three of you explored each other with fevered intensity, your bodies moving in a dance of pleasure. Hands roamed, skin heated beneath skilled caresses, and the air was thick with the scent of arousal. The weight of your combined power and desire enveloped them, each touch and kiss unlocking a new level of ecstasy.

Noir and Miguel admired the sight before them, intoxicated by the pleasure they had brought to you. The sight of you trembling, your body glistening with sweat and cum, made them feel a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. They exchanged glances, sharing a wordless understanding of the pleasure they had just shared.

With gentle care, they helped you ease down from the height of your climax. Their touches were tender, their hands caressing your body, soothing them with comforting gestures. The room was filled with a lingering warmth, a tangible sensation of their shared intimacy. The air was filled with a mix of scents: the musk of sex, the sweet sweat, and the lingering aroma of their passion. It was a scent that reminded them of the pleasure they had shared, a memory etched into their senses.

———

a/n: i need to be put down 😀

🏷️: @refridgerators @sabcandoit @kairiscorner @alliwriteistrash

#spiderman atsv #miguel o'hara #spider man: across the spider verse #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel spiderman #atsv x reader #spider person #miguel o’hara x y/n #spidersona #ao3 works #spider man noir #spiderman noir #spider noir #noir smut #miguel smut #🌱 lin writes #fucked out-miguel & noir #atsv #atsv smut

[noyzinerd]

My Sterek snippets-Part 2

As promised, two more, separate, but related, snippets from my wip "Pseudology" (that I have no idea how to connect).

*

"So, let me get this straight. You know that I like you?"

"Yes."

"And I now know that you like me?"

"Yes."

"But you and I aren't ever going to do anything about it?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Because we like each other too much…? And since getting together is only going to end badly for the both of us, we're not even going to try. Am I getting this right?" He couldn't help the exasperated, annoyed tone that came out with those words.

Even if he didn't outwardly show it in his words, Derek's tight lipped half smile was more than enough of an indicator that he understood Stiles' feelings way too well. "Exactly."

Stiles roughly scratched his short nails over his scalp, through his hair, at the mere thought of how close he had been to having Derek this whole time, to still being able to have him, if it weren't for the unbelievably aggravating cock-block that was their morals.

Derek liked him. He had liked him. Stiles was having a really hard time wrapping his head around this new revelation. Around the fact that Derek goddamn Hale had feelings for him. Moreover, it actually sounded like Derek was friggin' head over heels, over the fucking moon for Stiles! The guy had been for years! YEARS! At the same exact time Stiles had been pining over him too. He had had a chance and he hadn't even known it.

What was worse was that, not even 20 whole minutes after finding out this lost opportunity of a lifetime, Derek was telling him that 'they' weren't going to be a thing. 'They' were never going to be a thing, because Derek was scared that trying to 'keep' Stiles was going to make him lose him forever. Derek had come up with this crazy plan for them to ignore both of their feelings and pretend like they weren't attracted to each other. For the rest of their lives.

And that wasn't even the craziest part about all this.

No, the craziest thing was that Stiles had goddamn fucking agreed to this! Because his stupid, overwhelmingly noble set of principles knew that, no matter how easy it would be to just lean in and kiss some sense into Derek, Stiles could never force him to do something he was so opposed to. Derek's mind seemed pretty set on yearning for Stiles from a distance until they both either moved on or died.

Hence, their current predicament.

Both desperately wanting to be with each other.

And at the same time, also desperately wanting to be anything but with each other.

Wanting to always be there to protect each other.

But also wanting to be as far away from each other as possible. To protect each other. From each other.

So, basically they wanted each other, but they also didn't want to want each other, while also not wanting to not want wanting each other.

God, this was all making his head hurt.

The sigh that left his body took most of his fight with it as it blew out his mouth. Stiles took a second to clench his hand painfully in his hair with a muffled, frustrated "AAAARGH!!!" into the elbow of his sweater (slightly startling Derek in the process), before composing himself and making one of the hardest, stupidest decisions in his young life.

"Okay," he said resignedly.

Without looking over at the man next to him, Stiles stared ahead wearily towards the gently sloshing pool as he forced himself to take all of the feelings of hope he had ever felt for him and Derek and smush them like a firefly under a really heavy book. He imagined catching every 'what if' scenario floating in his head in a butterfly net, tying off the overstuffed net, and drowning them all in a big jar of water. No more thinking about their hands accidentally brushing in the Jeep. No more happy thoughts about what it might have felt like to lay on Derek's broad chest as they read a book together. No more thinking about what it might have been like to have strong arms hugging him from behind. Or what it might have been like to steal Derek's toast from out of his hand in the morning because Stiles was late for work. Or elbowing each other at the sink they shared as they fought to brush their teeth at the same time. Or hearing someone whisper tenderly in his ear 'I love you' and actually mean it for once.

As painful as it was, Stiles knew that it would be worse moving forward with the want of something more when he knew he and Derek weren't going to happen. He had to accept that. It would be unfair to keep pushing his expectations onto Derek, knowing that Derek couldn't give him that, and Stiles wasn't sure he would be able to survive another Lydia-esque type of relationship of desperately throwing himself at someone for ten years until he finally got deemed worthy enough for attention.

In the end, this was what would be the best for them.

It had to be.

Stiles couldn't afford to think otherwise.

*

"Okay, you know what? That's it." Stiles jumped to his feet, whirling angrily to stare down at Derek. The conviction in his eyes was eerily similar to the fed up, no-nonsense, 'here's how this is going to go' look Stiles had leveled him while 'harbouring his fugitive ass'. Derek had already known he wasn't going to win this argument the moment Stiles had opened his mouth. Even though Stiles hadn't laid into him yet, he knew he wouldn't stand a chance against all the well-thought out, overanalyzed points Stiles had probably gone over in his head thousands of times. Derek was going to lose and Stiles would end up being his boyfriend whether he liked it or not, and there was nothing he could do about it. A part of him was scared shitless at the idea, fully preparing to go down claws swinging.

Another part of him was on the edge of its seat with perked ears, desperate for Stiles to prove him wrong.

"I. Am. So. Done. You hear me? I'm tired, Derek. I'm tired of always being the responsible one. I'm tired of investigating glowing keys instead of making out with hot girls. I'm tired of studying werewolf migrations while Scott makes out with whatever girlfriend he happens to be with. I'm tired of stopping Alphas when I finally get first seat in lacrosse. I'm tired of driving the girl I've wanted for years to a dance to show up her ex. I'm tired of letting a girl work out her PTSD on my dick. I'm tired of getting carpal tunnel from writing six extra pages of notes for everybody in every class because being a werewolf apparently means never having time to study and dropping out of classes on a dime! More than anything, I'm tired of being miserable for the sake of everyone's happiness and then pretending I'm not miserable, because me having problems in my life would be inconvenient for everybody. Especially when an ID tag needs to be pickpocketed or blue prints need to be printed out. I've stepped aside for you and the rest of the pack for years and dammit if I can't get to have at least one thing that makes me happy. We're done doing what you want this time, Derek, alright?"

"Stiles, I'm not just going to go back on what I believe is best for us just because you find it unfair. You think I like teaming up with Peter every time Beacon Hills has a crisis? Do you think I like living with that son of a bitch? Sharing the same air as him? The bastard killed my sister! We all have to do things we don't want to do, put up with things we don't like, because we have to. Life is unfair. Some of us don't get to go to the Winter Formal, let alone take the girl of our dreams, because some of us no longer had a place to live. You want to complain about school, lacrosse, problems with your best friend? You're lucky to have had any of those at all! You have so much to be happy for. You don't need me to have that. In fact, you have more to lose being with me. So much. Being with me is just going to fuck it all up, Stiles. Why can't you see that?"

"Alright, Derek. Kid gloves are coming off. Wanna play hard ball? I'll play hard ball. You have three reasons why we can't be together. One: you think you'll get me hurt. Two: you think you're a bad relationship magnet. Three: you think all the terrible supernatural stuff that happens to me is your fault. Let's break 'em down. Number one: I'm going to get hurt with or without you. When you were here, we were attacked by the Kanima. When you left for South America, I was possessed by the Nogitsune. When you were here, I was attacked by Gerard Argent. When you were gone, I was attacked by a chimera and the ghost riders. Not everything is about you, Derek. I get hurt. The people of Beacon Hills are just in a hot spot of weird and that's not your fault. Number two: you're not the only one of us that's been in a string of awful relationships. They happen. But, you know what? That doesn't mean good relationships and good people don't exist. The moment you doubt the likelihood of your relationship, you're dooming it to fail. And finally, number three: if there's anyone to blame for not having a normal life, it's me. I was the one who dragged Scott into the woods because I was a dumb kid that wanted to see a dead body, which I can't even begin to apologize for, and who abandoned Scott in the woods to be attacked. I got him into this whole werewolf mess in the first place, not you. If you want to get technical, Peter was the one who bit him if you want to blame someone. My point is: all of your reasons are stupid and are just there to keep up your brooding aesthetic, so you're going to shut your trap, quit displaying your dominance over everything, and listen to what I have to say for once. When—not if, when—we get out of here, you, Derek Samson Hale, are going on a fucking date with me. You are going to hold my goddamn hand while we watch a movie on my couch, preferably Star Wars but I'm willing to haggle. We are getting greasy take-out food, going out for ice cream cones, and looking over some kind of sparkly body of water or bright star constellations or-or city lights from a cliff or whatever twinkly shit is romantic that night until it gets way too cold. And don't think I'm taking it easy on you either. Oh, no. I'm going to be the cutest, most charismatic motherfucker you've ever seen. I'm talking full head-on-shoulder action during the movie, nonstop little half-smiles all day long, dropping a shit-ton of quarters out of my wallet while trying to find a bill smaller than a 50, and if you think for one second that I'm not going to boop you on the nose with my ice cream when you least expect it before licking it off your face, you better think again. I fully intend on charming the pants off you. Whether or not that's literal is up to you. That all okay with you?"

It was scary and new and he felt vulnerable and raw and it hurt to hope, but Stiles—smart, beautiful, cunning Stiles—was finally ripping down all of his carefully crafted excuses and telling him that it was okay to chase after something that made him happy.

"Okay."

[Part 1 of snippets]

#sterek #teen wolf #derek hale #tyler hoechlin #stiles stilinski #dylan o'brien #mieczysław stiles stilinski #snippet #wip #fanfiction #Whenever I post writings it's always from this fic #I'm probably never going to finish it #My headcanon that Derek's middle name is Samson because it means strength #Pseudology #Pseudologoi

[not-eli]

"Let me hold you, hold you close, I long to hear your voice."

"But dearest, I know better, now I must give you this choice."

You don't know how important these lines are to me.

Stolas always had an obvious attraction for Blitzø. The both of them had a strong connection that was sadly only fulfilled by sexual encounters.

The first time we see Stolas and Blitzø interacting in the first episode the latter makes it clear that it is NOT a good time to talk at the moment. Yet, Stolas doesn't care and proceeds to propose their now well known full moon deal, to then begin with his - insanely - long dirty talk. So, we can say that at first he could not care less if Blitzø was in the mood or not - he HAD to have him when he wanted.

With the progressing of the series, however, Stolas begins to slowly acknowledge the meaning of "time" and "moments".

To quote, "You know, Octavia is with her mother all the weekend so we could-"

"I'm NOT fucking you tonight Stolas I- I'm really not in the mood."

"...We could watch a movie.. or cuddle <3"

(Blitzø still rejected, but we can't blame him)

I like to believe that at that moment, even if he did want sex Stolas would not have insisted for Blitzø to do anything against his will. He would have just let him go, as long as he was comfortable.

That is a clear demonstration of his already present feelings, that were slowly becoming more and more pure.

So, while at first he did not give a fuck about the right or wrong time, and would just focus on his own pleasure, Stolas getting the Asmodeus crystal and wiling to break their monthly deal just so Blitzø can be comfortable is so important to me. He finally understood the importance of comfort and consent, and would never - ever - force Blitzø to sleep with him just to have his book.

He's also quite challenging him. If Blitzø really loves him, he'd want to be with him even without their deal.

(im so not ready for this episode.)

So, with the "Now I must leave you this choice" lyrics Stolas shows to have understood - or at least is trying to - what Blitzø is going through, and wants to be there for him desperately. He wants to help him, lift him up, even if that means never seeing him again.

Look at me in the face and tell me they're toxic I dare you.

#THEY'RE NOT #...i mean yeah but #only at the start yk #stolitz #helluva boss #helluva boss stolas #helluva boss blitzo #stolas x blitz #I love them so much it's unreal #just look my way #look my way #stolas goetia #character analysis

[autism-corner]

The Seven and a Half Morningstars

AO3 || 2.1K words || you/yours pronouns || Masterlist

Levi and Lilith have something in common. Something none of their brothers have. They both are the reason that 'the morningstar/demon brothers' doesn't really apply anymore.

-

transfem sisters figuring themself out together. although, not at the same time or without severe loss (and gain). <3

ft. you loving levi (either romantically or platonically)

Levi knew. She’d known for a long time, but she was content with the way things were. Until you came around. She could handle everyone seeing a gross guy otaku. She could not handle you, seeing her in a way that wasn’t her true self. It felt like lying to you, and that's the last thing she’s ever wanted. Part of her thought it was selfish, but she wanted you to love her. Not him.

—

It all began way back in the celestial realm. Back when they were known as the seven brothers. Ofcourse, everyone was siblings to each other in that place, but everybody could tell that these seven had something special between them. Lucifer, the morningstar, had basically adopted the younger boys, and it created a bond that few, if any, could break. While every one of them looked up to Lucifer, each angel was also steadily growing attached to the other 5. Mammon and Asmo were both extremely extroverted and found common ground there, and the twins were already close as could be. Lilith and Levi were both outsiders, and that’s where they connected.

Ofcourse, Lilith had the twins as well, but Lilith tended to wander around more, and he kept feeling like he didn’t really belong in heaven anyway. Ofcourse, Lilith loved his brothers, but sometimes he longed for a different life. A more free one. That’s why he drifted towards Levi. Leviathan always seemed to be in his own little world, and Lilith wanted to join him. So the two hung out a lot together, slowly creating a world away from everyone.

—

Lilith laid out on Levi’s bed. His arms reached out towards the roof, seemingly grasping the words to explain his thoughts. “You know,” He began. Levi sat in his chair in the corner of his room. Even though he seemed to be reading a book, Lilith knew Levi would listen to him. “I wish things were different. You understand, right?” A vague ‘hm’ came from the corner. Lilith sat up. He only ever did that when things got serious. “I don’t mean here.” A sigh. “I’m talking about like. Feelings and stuff.” This made Levi pause. Levi knew that he wasn’t the best with feelings or expressing things. But he also knew that Lilith understood that. He closed his book and waited. Clearly, Lilith had a lot to say about this, and the only thing Levi could do was wait and hear him out.

“I’m also not talking about struggling with feelings like you are. This is…” Hesitation. This was definitely a difficult subject for Lilith to talk about. He’d started biting his nails again. “More personal, in a way? I think.” He fell back down on the bed, still fidgeting. Levi slowly looked up.

This was so different from the usual Lilith. Lilith is often so full of energy that Levi could barely even keep up. This Lilith is trying to be calculated and calm, and it’s worrying Levi. “You should stop biting your nails.” A quiet response from Levi. A silent way that tells Lilith that he cares about him, and that he’s paying attention to him.

“Can you come here for a second? Just lay next to me. Please.” To many others this would’ve sounded like a simple request. But Levi picked up on the desperation that was hidden behind it. He slowly got up and walked up to Lilith, who was now curled up on his side. Levi joined him, laying, although stiffly, beside him. Levi wasn’t sure yet how to approach the situation, but he would stay and listen to anything Lilith had to say.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Lilith's hand move. An invitation (request?) to hold his hand. He sat aside the discomfort he might feel with physical touch, and joined their fingers together. He’d do anything to comfort Lilith.

“I don’t want to say it this bluntly, but I can't figure out a better way.” Lilith had pulled up a pillow and was clutching it against his chest. “I don’t think I’m a guy.”

—

It wasn’t often that people would see Lilith cry. Lilith often had a way of life that would brighten up every room, conversation and face. The ways that Lilith broke that day, in front of Levi, showed the weight of this issue. Clearly this had been bothering Lilith for a long time now.

Lilith began explaining to Levi about all the things she’d wish to be different. And Levi listened. What else could he do? Lilith explained that she didn’t necessarily want her name to change. She’d grown up with this name and had so many memories with it, it was impossible to be complete without her name. But she did want people to refer to her differently. She wanted to be called pretty and cute and beautiful. She wanted to be a little sister.

Levi listened and understood. Levi helped her alter her clothes, helped her pick out new ones. Together with Levi, Lilith became who she wanted to be. And together with Levi, she explained it to everyone else. Thanks to Levi, she became her full self.

Things were glorious for a couple of centuries. Everyone lived and laughed, now being known as ‘The Seven Morningstars’, rather than 'The Seven Brothers'. Everything was perfect.

Until she fell.

—

Desperation broke out. How could Father do this? How could He break up their family, their comfort. How dare He take away their little sister. It was unfair.

They had to keep living.

Dark times turned darker upon their arrival in the Devildom, strangers in a new world. But with the darker times, aside from the anger still flaming within everyone, new forms of warmth began to rise as well.

Lilith’s replacement, set free by the anger she caused, came to them. Ofcourse, no one but himself saw Satan as Lilith’s counterpart, but that didn’t soothe his anger. He raged and rampaged wherever he could, but slowly gained comfort in the sister he never had. He finally settled with a piece of Lilith in his heart, allowing himself to release the anger she could never express.

Like before, they started being known as ‘The Seven Brothers’ again.

All the struggles they went through together made them that much closer, now only having each other to depend on. Bond’s grew again and strengthened, setting them up for their new life. A new life that is better than they could’ve ever imagined back in the Celestial Realm. A life with freedom. A life that Lilith gave hers for.

—

Levi had taken it hard. Her fall. Even though the relationships with his brothers improved, to levels never even achievable in the celestial realm, an important part of his life became irreplaceable. Someone to actually talk to, someone who got him, someone who was like him. He never got the guts to actually tell her. How he related to her. How he too, wished to change.

It caused a silent suffering.

Until you came. Even though things hadn’t been all that bad, he viewed you as his saviour. The one who brightened up his days again, gave him everything they could. But most importantly, someone who understood him. You made him better. Like his sister had before.

That’s when Levi started to question things again. You were able to give him his confidence back. When you were together, it felt like nothing could tear you apart. It was a mutual understanding between the both of you. It felt like Levi was back with Lilith again, but improved. Ofcourse, nothing could replace Lilith, not even you. But you gave him back his feelings, familiar yet somehow more intense. More worth the risk.

During the healing you were the cause of, Levi began to find their truth again. The truth that they had always already known, but often pushed back, was being indefinitely resurfaced by you. You reminded Levi of her. And now, finally comfortable, she could rise & remain.

Lilith was the one to tell Levi about this. Levi was never good with her own feelings, after all. If she hadn’t indirectly told Leviathan that being like this was okay, that things could change for the better, that life doesn’t have to be a struggle, Levi might’ve never even known. And now, it’s time for her to tell you.

—

She wasn’t as brave as her little sister. She couldn’t possibly tell you this straight to your face. Praise to the devildom and its better developed technology. A voice message it’ll be. A regular text message did feel a little too impersonal for something like this.

“Hey. uhm. Right.” A clear fumble with paper can be heard. The clearing of a throat. With a robotic voice, certainly reading a script that’s been spent hours on, Leviathan started. “I don’t know how to properly tell you this. It’s hard. But very. very. important. To me. I. I am not. who you think I am. But I want to be. And I know you want me to be myself as well. You have told me that plenty of times. And I am grateful for that. It is because of your continued persistence in being comfortable with myself that I bring you this. That I trust you with this. Because I don’t think I can continue being a guy.”

It was a sudden and unprompted message to you, with an even more abrupt ending. Upon finishing her script, Levi pressed the send button immediately and directly shut off her phone. She couldn’t bear the thoughts about your response, but knew she’d have to.

It hadn’t even been a minute when you knocked on her door. Within that time, you had listened to the message, sent her a streak of five different messages in response, and raced through the entire HOL to her room. It only took two unanswered knocks for you to barge into her space, where you hurried to her bed to find her already sobbing.

Her emotional state, and her body finally being engulfed in your arms, made her spill everything. About Lilith, and how she was the one that planted this idea in her head in the first place. How hard it had been without her. How regretful she is for never having been able to tell her little sister.

She told you about how much you mean to her, and how she kept thinking, no, knowing, you only loved the wrong version of her. You loved the version of her that kept wishing he was different, that forced himself to be someone he only partly was. You loved someone that was not her. And she told you about how hurt that made her feel.

But she also talked about how loved she felt by you. How despite the rude comments Levi made, both towards Levi’s self as to others, it never made you love Levi any less. She talked about how lovingly and calmly you always handled her meltdowns, how you asked permission for every touch, how you didn’t grow annoyed anytime her energy was too low. She talked about all the things she would miss if she lost you. Things only you could give her. Things that made her feel like she was worthy of love, things that made her believe being herself might be worth it. You make her believe suffering doesn’t have to be.

—

It was an emotional and extremely draining rant. Many tears were shed, from both sides. At the end, you had simply kissed her head. It was enough for Leviathan to feel at peace. The mentally taxing questions could come later. For now the two of you would cuddle and rewatch TSL. No need to talk. Now was the time to simply lay embraced and at rest, as the both of you slowly drifted off thanks to the comfortable atmosphere. It somehow felt an impossible amount more loving than usual.

—

It was amazing to see her flourish. Huge bits of her anxieties were visibly taken away as soon as she grew comfortable in her new out and proud identity. She smiled and laughed more, talked more enthusiastically in her higher trained voice, and was more excited for the mundane joys. Life was easier. Life was better. Alongside you, thanks to you, she grew into herself. Nothing else changed much. She kept being her otaku self, she kept sneering comments anytime her envy flared up, and she kept the same bond with each of her brothers like she always had. Loving in their own special way.

Although, admittedly, one sibling-relationship did change. Anytime she found joy in her womanhood, there was a little part in her that felt more love, more similarity for her sister. A connection that was evergrowing. Despite never being able to tell Lilith, Levi knew she had known. Lilith had always had her way with people like that. Levi knew that somewhere, Lilith was smiling down to her. The exact same way she had once she started living her full life as herself.

#transfems my love <3 #also levi's hella autistic <3 #anyway although Levi's gender is so magical that it'll remain a secret to me personally. I will always firmly believe that Lilith is a tran #btw titel is not to call either satan or lilith half a morningstar. it just feels weird to put either 7 or 8 because neither feel true to m #urgh #obey me #obey me fanfic #obey me x reader #obey me leviathan x reader #leviathan x reader #transfeminine fanfic #transgender #obey me fluff #obey me leviathan #obey me lilith #obey me sibling bonding #obey me comfort #sillyposting #my work