#and YOU will learn what all of that just now means! one of these days! when I get to it!

[girlgenius1111]

wise beyond her years

sol meets someone, and it's doomed from the start. everyone can see it, except her. ingrid tries to balance being supportive and being... a parent?

based [ish] on the manuscript by taylor swift... mostly the lyrics "afterwards she only ate kids cereal and couldn't sleep unless it was in her mother's bed"

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You met her at one of Ingrid’s games. Mapi had gone down to the locker room at halftime, and you’d been content to sit in your seat and scroll through your phone until the team made their way back out. That was, until she slid into the seat next to you and introduced herself. 

Camila. She was a bit taller than you, the epitome of Spanish beauty. She spoke English with an adorable accent, and when you looked into her eyes for the first time, you were almost speechless. She looked to be a bit older than you. Maybe around Ingrid’s age. 

You should have known better. You should have thought about how odd it was that she’d been sitting a few rows up and only came to talk to you when you were alone. How those first few dates she took you on always ended with her getting you to invite her to the next Barça game. 

It was so easy for her. You were… healing. That didn't mean that you were healed. Freud would have rolled in his grave at how oblivious you were. Dating an older woman. Only a month or so after a huge fallout with your mother. Letting her talk you into things you weren’t quite sure about. Let her talk her way into your heart, making promises and declarations of love that came much too soon. 

She said that she loved you. And it wasn’t that you believed her, not really. You just thought that if you tried hard enough to be perfect, one day she would love you.

------

Ingrid had made her displeasure with Camila known to you from the beginning. She knew exactly what the woman was up to, it was obvious to everyone but you. She was using you because you were an easy target, and you were vulnerable and young and excited that someone was paying attention to you. 

You wouldn’t listen to Ingrid, though. Not when she warned you nicely about Camila, or when she warned you much more seriously. You ignored her words completely, dismissed them. And Ingrid didn’t want to fight with you, but she couldn’t hold back her feelings about this woman that had slipped into your life, so poor Mapi bore the brunt of the Norwegian’s rants about how Camila was not good enough for her Solstråle. 

This was the case today. You were off with Camila, and Ingrid was going crazy back home. It had been weeks, and this was still going on. The worry and concern your sister had for you was at a high, it was all she could think about. Mapi felt similarly, but she tried to keep her cool because she knew very well that telling you not to date the woman would only make you want to date her more. 

“She’s going to get hurt.” Ingrid said. 

“She might. That’s how she learns, though, mi amor. We have to let her make her own mistakes.” 

“Did you read that in your parenting book?” Ingrid asked with a slight smirk. 

Mapi flushed red, avoiding her girlfriend’s gaze. “It is not a parenting book. It is a… helping sad teens book.” She argued. 

Ingrid softened. “María, don’t be embarrassed. Getting a book to learn how to help Solstråle better… that is sweet and thoughtful. Just like you.” 

Now, Mapi was blushing again, but this time a small smile adorned her features, though worry was still clouding her eyes. “Are you sure it’s okay? I know she’s your sister, and I do not want to overstep.” 

Ingrid just shook her head. “No, you are not overstepping. I couldn’t do this without you, María, and I mean that. You balance me out. I was worried, for a while, about being too much like my mother. You’d never let that happen, though, and it’s like a safety net. I don’t need to worry as much about making a mistake because you’re always there to tell me when I’m not doing the right thing. And you don’t have to be, but you are. I don’t thank you enough for that, my love. I don’t tell you enough, how incredible you are,  for being so full of love, and so happy to share it with everyone you meet.” 

“I love you.” María whispered back. “I love you, and I love mi sol, and I tolerate her dog, but I love our family. Sol is a special kid and… I don’t know. I just want you both to be happy. I want you both to feel loved and worthy of love because you are.” 

Ingrid isn’t quite sure how this conversation about your ‘girlfriend’ had led to this incredibly mushy conversation, but she pulled Mapi into her and squeezed tightly. “ Don’t make me cry, Solstråle will be home soon and she’ll make fun of me.”

Mapi laughed loudly, quickly wiping a tear off Ingrid’s cheek as the front door opened, announcing your arrival home. When you walked into the living room, it was to see Mapi and Ingrid curled up together on the couch, which wasn’t an unusual sight. Nor was the way they were looking at each other unusual, either. Like seeing the other person smile could sustain the other for days. Ingrid and Mapi loved each other so deeply, and so easily, it was clear for anyone to see. 

You wanted that, you really did. And you thought you had it where you definitely didn’t. You’d have it one day, though. Something told you that. 

-------

You weren’t sitting with Mapi at the match today. Camila had wanted it to be a real date, and not be supervised by your sister’s girlfriend, though she still wanted to attend the match. You’d been excited about it, even though you’d spent most of your free time with her in the past couple weeks. Well, excited until she’d disappeared right before kick off to get you both waters, and had been gone for 20 minutes. 

You were really just worried that something had happened to slow her down, so you got up when an opposing player went down and headed off in search of her. 

You found her pretty easily, leaning against a wall by the bathroom, talking to a girl. A girl that looked to be about your age, that looked just like you in fact. You tried not to jump to conclusions as you froze, watching carefully from a few meters away. It was obvious, though, what was going on. Even more obvious when Camila reached out and tucked a piece of the girl’s hair behind her ear.

 It wasn’t immediately clear to you what to do. You knew you should be angry, but really all you felt was hurt. Before Camila could spot you, you headed back to your seat, and when Camila returned a few minutes later, you did what you were used to. You shut down. You answered her questions with shrugs or nods, even when she started to get annoyed that you weren’t speaking. 

You wanted to talk to Frido. Not Ingrid or Mapi, because they’d freak out. Mapi would get all weirdly protective and huffy, and Ingrid would just be furious that you hadn’t listened to her. Frido would listen to you, and tell you what to do. You couldn’t get to the Swede, though, not without seeing your sister and her girlfriend. And by the time the final whistle blew, Camila’s anger was simmering under the surface, and she practically dragged you from the stadium. You quickly texted Mapi, telling her you were leaving with Camila, before your girlfriend pushed you into the car and all but slammed the door. You winced at the sound, knowing that you shouldn’t feel guilty for how you were acting. Camila should be the one feeling bad, but you couldn’t help the nagging feeling to just apologize and let it go. 

It was like the old version of you and the newer version were fighting. Was this how you deserved to be treated? Had Camila really done anything wrong? Your brain was a mess, and as Camila pulled the car out of the parking spot, and began to drive, you decided that you just needed some space to think. 

“Can you take me home?” You asked quietly, looking at your girlfriend out of the corner of your eye. She seemed to relax a bit, now that you’d spoken. Camila didn’t look as angry anymore. Just worried. 

“Is everything okay? You’ve gone silent on me.” Camila asked gently. Or, at least, it sounded gentle. She was giving you a kind, concerned smile but there was a look in her eyes that made you kind of uneasy. You ignored it, focusing on the softness, letting yourself be lulled into a false sense of security. You told yourself to be honest, that it was probably just a misunderstanding. That Camila would make you feel better about it, explain it all away. And everything would go back to normal. 

“I just… I saw you talking to that girl by the bathroom. It looked kind of cozy.” You said cautiously. The car came upon an intersection, a red light, and Camila came to a stop before she looked over at you. The concern was gone from her face. The softness nowhere to be found. She just looked furious at you. 

“Did you follow me to the bathroom for a reason?” She asked venomously. 

You shook your head, surprised at the turn this conversation had taken. “No, no, you were gone for a while, and I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” 

Camila rolled her eyes as the light turned green, looking away from you and at the road. “Sure. I was just saying hi to an old friend. There’s no need to get all jealous.” 

“I’m not jealous.” You replied, sitting up straighter in your seat, a bit of anger flaring in you. Anger you hadn’t felt in a while, but a feeling that still filled your veins with fire. “I just wanted to know why you were flirting with someone while we were on a date.” 

Camila scoffed. “I was not flirting. I told you it was an old friend. I barely talked to her, what are you being so dramatic about?” 

“I really don’t think I’m being dramatic. I just asked you a question.” You said, trying to remain calm even as your girlfriend got angrier and angrier next to you. 

“No, you acted like a child. Going completely silent and ruining our date? I know you’re young, but I expected you to act like an adult and be more mature than that. It’s honestly embarrassing.” 

You felt your cheeks burn, and you chewed on your lip for a minute, trying not to say anything you’d regret. “I asked you a question, and you just keep deflecting. I don’t think I am being the childish one.” 

“Is this the mommy issues or something?” Camila asked, a cruel smile playing on her lips. You sat silent for a moment, not completely sure you’d heard her correctly. 

“Excuse me?” 

“The jealousy, the insecurity? I know your mom fucked you up, but this is ridiculous. We’ve only been together for a few weeks, why are you being so clingy? It’s fucking annoying, and I’ll tell you right now, no one on earth is going to want to put up with this. Especially not from you, it’s not worth it.” 

You blinked, completely shocked. You hadn’t expected her to get so angry when you’d been honest about your insecurity and worry. And you hadn’t expected her to throw things that you’d told her in a moment of vulnerability in your face either. “Are you serious?” You asked, voice cracking slightly. 

Camila let out a humorless laugh, parking the car in front of the cafe you were supposed to be going to. “Are you going to cry now?” She asked mockingly. “Christ, you really are too young. I don’t want to date someone this immature.”

You stared at her, feeling like you had whiplash from the turn this conversation had taken. It seemed like she was breaking up with you. Which was probably for the best, if this was how she reacted to you bringing up an issue with her. Still, it was like you were seeing a side of her you’d never seen before. Cold. Cruel. She looked completely unbothered as she unlocked the car doors and gave you a pointed look, one that clearly told you that this conversation was over. 

She looked unbothered, and you felt  your heart shatter as your biggest fear was coming true. You were too much. It had only taken Camila weeks to get tired of you. Hot tears fell down your cheeks, ones you desperately tried to hide. You were sad and embarrassed, but most of all. You just felt so hopeless. 

As you got out of the car, without another word said to your now ex-girlfriend, you wondered how you could have been so naive to think that someone would want you. Camila was right. You were too screwed up for anyone to choose you. 

You walked right into the cafe, making a beeline for the bathroom. Locking and shutting the door behind you, the last of your resolve broke, and you worked hard to quiet the broken sobs falling from your lips. 

Stupid. You’d been so stupid. It wasn’t the first time someone had broken your trust, or said something awful to you. But it was the first time since… things had changed. And somehow, you’d forgotten how much it hurt, feeling unwanted. You had been used to it, before, numb to it. Now, though, it burned sharp in your chest. Shame and sadness and anger and frustration. And still. That persistent feeling of hopelessness. How was anyone ever supposed to want you?

-------

Mapi had a weird feeling when you called. Your text after the match had sounded odd, and you were supposed to be getting coffee with Camila. She didn’t really have any other reason to be worried, but for some reason, she was. 

“Maps?” You greeted quietly. You called Mapi on purpose. She worried less than Ingrid, and while she disapproved of Camila, she had been pretending that she didn’t. Mapi was more likely to be willing to come and get you. Ingrid, on the other hand, you assumed would be too angry that you hadn’t listened to her. Too vindicated, and too caught up in being right to comfort you. 

“Hey, nena. What’s up?” Mapi asked. 

“Can you come get me?” You mumbled, the embarrassment of the situation really hitting you full force. 

“Send me your location, I’m on my way.” Mapi replied instantly, and you really appreciated that she didn’t try to get any details out of you, was just focused on getting to you as fast as possible. 

“Can you bring Scout?” You asked after a moment’s hesitation, knowing how Mapi felt about bringing the dog in the car with her. The simple question sent another wave of worry through the Spaniard’s body, knowing you really only asked for something you needed when… you really needed it. 

“Of course. Do you want to stay on the phone with me?” Mapi asked, rushing to grab her keys, ignoring the questioning look Ingrid was giving her from the couch, having woken up from a nap. 

“No, it’s okay. I’ll see you soon.” 

“Okay, mi sol. I love you.” 

“Love you too.” You whispered, choking back a sob as you hung up. 

“What is it? Where is she? Is she okay? Did something happen?” Ingrid asked rapidly, moving to get up from the couch. 

“Scout! Ven aqui!” Mapi called, rolling her eyes when the dog appeared instantly, as if he knew the reason for being summoned. “I don’t know, she just asked me to come get her. Don’t get up. Stay here, rest. I’ll get pequeña.” 

“But-” 

“No buts, princesa. Stay here. I’ve got this covered, we’ll be back soon. Don’t move from this couch, I mean it.” Mapi insisted, never one to take Ingrid’s recovery casually. 

Ingrid frowned but sat back down on the couch, watching as her girlfriend and your dog disappeared out the front door, both of them moving like they were on a mission. If there was one thing Mapi could agree with Scout on, it was that you were very important.

-------

When Mapi pulled up in front of the cafe, she saw you sitting with a to-go cup of coffee at a little table, staring at the ground. She parked quickly, finding a spot just around the corner,  before she got out to walk over to you, bringing Scout with her. Scout pulled harshly on his leash, and for once, Mapi didn’t mind. 

“Solstråle?” Mapi called when she got close enough, seeing your head whip up to look in the direction of your name. In a flash, you were abandoning your coffee and all but launching yourself towards Mapi. The Spaniard didn’t say anything, not quite sure what had happened but able to infer that it wasn’t good. 

“Thanks for coming so fast.” You said quietly, feeling just marginally better now that Mapi had pulled you into a tight hug. Scout nudged your leg with his nose rather insistently, until you pulled away from the hug and crouched down to pet him. 

“Of course, mi sol. I’ll always come for you. Did something happen?” Mapi asked, never not amazed by the way Scout instantly brought a small smile to your face, even if your eyes were still slightly wet with tears. 

“We broke up.” You said simply, though your voice cracked over the last word. 

“Oh, nena. I’m so sorry.” Mapi sighed. “Let's get you home, yeah?” 

“Okay.” You agreed, although you really weren’t looking forward to it. You wanted to go home, curl up into a ball and cry, by yourself. At the same time, you desperately wanted a hug from your sister. You were just completely convinced that she wouldn’t be willing to do that. 

-------

You walked into the house just behind Mapi, trying to take deep, steadying breaths. You were close to breaking down, and you didn’t really need to hear all the reasons that Ingrid had known this would happen. You didn’t need an ‘I told you so.’ 

Your sister was waiting for you in the entrance hall, pacing nervously, when you walked in. 

“Solstråle! What happened? Are you okay?” Ingrid asked as soon as you were through the door, ignoring Mapi’s look that was clearly telling her to be cool. 

“It’s fine, I’m fine. I want to be alone.” You said, pushing past her to head for the stairs. You heard Ingrid begin to go after you, but Mapi stopped her, telling her to give you a minute. 

-------

You collapsed onto your bed, Scout jumping up next to you like he thought it was a game. You just wished it would just swallow you up. It was only a few minutes later that you heard footsteps approaching your door, like you knew they would. A soft knock on your door interrupted your crying, and you hastily wiped at your eyes. “Yeah?”

Ingrid peaked her head in. “I know you said you want to be alone, but I just wanted to check…” she said, trailing off when she saw you valiantly fighting your tears. 

“I’m okay.” You mumbled, focusing on petting Scout, as opposed to looking at your sister. 

“Honey, you aren’t.” Ingrid sighed, moving in closer to take a seat on the edge of your bed. “You’re upset, that’s okay. You don’t need to be embarrassed.” 

“Well, I am. You were right. Is that what you wanted to hear?” You asked bitingly, not really intending to snap so harshly at your sister, but not quite sure you felt like you could trust her at the moment. 

“No, sweetheart, that is not what I wanted to hear. I wanted to be wrong about her, solstråle, more than anything. I am so sorry things didn’t end well.” 

“You aren’t glad that you’re right?” You asked, astonished. It didn't really make sense to you; all of this could have been avoided if you’d just listened to your sister. How could she be sorry for you when you’d blatantly ignored her advice? 

Ingrid shook her head, her face painfully full of pity and sympathy. “No, not if it means that you’re hurting.” 

“Oh.” You weren’t quite sure what to do with that. You’d been prepared to deal with this yourself. To be completely honest, you didn’t really feel like you deserved Ingrid’s support. You’d been so stupid not to listen to her. This was all your fault, really, and Ingrid shouldn’t have to deal with implications of something that was ultimately your mistake. “I’m sorry, I should have listened.” You said quietly, looking down, refusing to make eye contact with your sister. 

“Don’t be sorry, solstråle.” Ingrid sighed. You looked so distraught, but you were leaning slightly away from your sister, like you were afraid to accept any comfort from her. Like suddenly, you weren’t sure you trusted her anymore. And though that hurt, Ingrid really couldn’t blame you. Not when the universe seemed so dead set on making you miserable. “What can I do?” 

“I just want to be alone.” You mumbled, wrapping your arms around yourself, completely invalidating your statement. 

“No, you don’t. Look at me.” Ingrid instructed, waiting until you raised your head to look at her, very cautiously. “You’re allowed to be sad about this. No matter what happened, no matter what I said about her before. I never want to see you hurting. You don’t have to deal with this alone just because you made a mistake. Okay?” 

You held your sister’s gaze for a few moments, before you slowly nodded your head. “I really liked her.” You whispered after a minute, leaning almost imperceptibly towards your sister. 

“I know. Come here, honey,” Ingrid said, opening her arms for you to all but collapse into them. It was familiar, at this point, being held tightly in Ingrid’s arms. It never failed to make you feel better. And while Ingrid wished that things would just be easier for you, a very critical part of herself settled when you relaxed against her. The brunette was never quite sure she was doing a good enough job with you, but when you went to her when you were upset, allowed her to help you, even if it was rather hesitantly, it felt reassuring to her. It wasn’t full trust, but you were getting there. She must be doing something right if you were making progress. 

“What would make you feel better?” Ingrid asked after a minute, smiling to herself at how Scout had settled himself with half his upper body draped across your legs. 

“Nothing.” You replied pathetically. It wasn’t the first relationship you’d had, but it felt so much more significant than any of the others had. In just a few weeks, Camila had made herself one of the most important things in your life. You weren’t really sure how she managed it, but somehow, she’d gotten you to confess things you’d told very few people, learned more about you than many people did. And as soon as things had started to not go her way, she’d used all those things against you. It was the first time in a while that you’d really let yourself be fully vulnerable with someone, and it had backfired so horrifically. You were hurt, and you were embarrassed, but most of all, you were just sad. 

You thought this was going to be a turning point for you, but you didn’t realize you’d given Camila all of the ammunition she’d needed to make sure it was the biggest setback you’d face. Not until you were lying in your bed, wanting nothing more than to disappear. You’d been nothing to her. That was a familiar feeling, something that made every cell in your body squirm with anxiety. It was happening again. 

“What are you thinking?” Ingrid asked, interrupting your rapid stream of thoughts. 

“Is it me? Do I just… make people want to treat me badly?” You asked. It wasn’t the first time you’d considered it, but that particular fear had been dormant since everything had happened in the last few weeks. Since Ingrid and Mapi had made it clear that they wanted you here with them. It was confusing and completely contradictory, your brain couldn’t really make sense of it. Your sister and her girlfriend must just be the exception. 

“No.” Ingrid said firmly. “No. It isn’t you. You just have… bad luck. You make me and Mapi want to be better, Solstråle. Better for you, so that we can take care of you in the way that you deserve. You are good, Solstråle, and you deserve good, even when you don’t feel like it.” 

For some reason, Ingrid’s words brought tears to your eyes. Good tears. “Well, I can’t have all bad luck. I get to be here with you two, and I don’t know if I would still be…” you trailed off, trying to figure out what you wanted to say. “You both saved my life, I think. The two of you wanting me here, and taking me in, that’s good luck.” You managed, sitting up and shifting so you were facing your sister, who looked one word away from bursting into tears herself. 

“It’s not good luck, mi sol. It’s what you deserve. It’s what you should have had this whole time.” Mapi chimed in from the doorway, looking fondly at the two of you. Ingrid smiled at her in thanks, humming quietly in agreement with her girlfriend’s statement. The Spaniard wandered in closer, flopping onto the free space on your bed, causing a disgruntled Scout to shift, kicking Mapi lightly in the side. “That girl did not deserve you. And you’ll find someone who wants to treat you the way you deserve. You just can’t rush stuff like that, sí? It will come to you when it does.” 

It was potentially the most frustrating advice to receive, but it made you feel better nonetheless. 

“And she was kind of ugly.” Mapi said as an afterthought. 

“Mapi!” You laughed, smiling a real smile. Both girls’ faces lit up at the sight of the smile on your face, and both of them were desperate for you to keep smiling, for your face not to fall into the sad frown it had been in for the past hour. The conversation lulled, and Ingrid’s mind raced, trying to think of what people liked to do after breakups. She’d been with Mapi for so long, she wasn’t sure she remembered. 

“Do you want to lay in bed alone for the rest of your night, or do you want to watch a movie? Or we could go get ice cream. Or we could go shopping. Or on a run. Or-” Ingrid listed, only stopping when you cut her off. 

“Sister movie night sounds good.” You said softly, unable to express in that moment how much you appreciated how hard she was trying. You knew ingrid probably wanted to talk, to hear everything that had happened, but she was learning to respect that you really only liked to talk when you felt like it. Which wasn’t often. 

“Sister movie night, cool.” Ingrid said, trying to act like she wasn’t thrilled that you’d decided to be with her instead of requesting to be alone. “Go pick a movie, I’ll make popcorn.” 

You all dragged yourselves off your soft comforter, having grown rather comfortable, and headed for your bedroom door. 

“I’ll be in the garage.” Mapi said, smiling at both of you as she tried to wordlessly communicate that she knew you both wanted sister time, and it was okay that it didn’t include her. Both you and Ingrid froze, though, turning slightly to stare at her like she’d said something absurd. 

“Don’t be stupid.” You said, rolling your eyes. “‘Sister movie night’ obviously means ‘sister and her live-in girlfriend’ movie night.” 

Mapi looked a bit surprised, though she shouldn’t have been. There were very few times that you just wanted to be with Ingrid, and those times were becoming less and less frequent as you began to depend on Mapi more and more. “You want me to watch with you?” 

“Sí.” You said, almost exasperated. “Why wouldn’t I want you to hangout with us?”

“I just thought it was Engen sister time…” Mapi trailed off, looking uncharacteristically insecure.  

“Engen León family time.” Ingrid amended, looking at you for approval. You nodded. 

“Who else is going to talk the entire length of the film?” You asked, smirking and sprinting off down the stairs when Mapi gave you an offended look, Scout hot on your heels. 

------

The movie had been a good distraction, not that Mapi or Ingrid really paid much attention to it. Instead, they kept glancing over at where you were curled up on the couch. Scout had taken his place next to you, one of his legs stretching out every now and then to kick in Mapi’s direction. 

The conversation with them had obviously made you feel better, but they were still rather uneasy. You were acting completely normally, all of a sudden. And they didn’t buy it, not for a second. They weren’t sure what had happened, because you hadn’t said, but they knew that it wasn’t good. You’d been infatuated with Camila, and now you were reluctant to speak her name. Whatever had gone on had hurt you, deeply, but in the span of a few hours, you were acting like you were completely fine. 

To you, it just felt like there was no use in thinking about it anymore. Crying over what happened, being sad or angry with Camila wouldn’t help you. It wouldn’t make you feel better. You’d very logically taken stock of your emotions, before deciding that they were completely useless. You were fine. 

Well, maybe not, but you would be fine. Especially if you acted like nothing was wrong. Like you weren’t questioning every choice you’d made with Camila. Like you didn’t hate yourself. Emotions only had power if you gave it to them, you decided. Before, you might have been angry. Now, though, you just… forced it all off, far away. No feeling anything until it hurt less to think about what had happened. 

It seemed like a good plan to you, and you stuck to it. Even when you couldn’t fall asleep that night, your mind swirling with horrible thoughts as you tried to push them away. Eventually, you gave up, putting on a show and forcing yourself to focus on that, instead. 

It was obvious that you hadn’t slept the next morning, walking down to the kitchen like a zombie. Ingrid and Mapi were hoping you’d be a little more forthcoming with what had occurred today, but all hopes of that went out the window when you avoided eye contact with them, a hood pulled over your head, dark bags under your eyes. At least you there was no school, as you had the day off, but they had training, training they couldn’t miss. Neither of them felt very good about leaving you home alone, with no idea what was going on in your head. 

You were blankly shoveling cereal into your mouth when Ingrid got your attention. 

“Solstråle!” She said rather loudly. You jumped slightly, looking across the table at her in confusion. “I said your name 5 times. Did you not hear me?” 

Ingrid didn’t sound mad, just worried, and you felt your throat tighten. 

No. No. No tears. No sadness. That wouldn’t help. Self pity wouldn’t help. The only thing to do was to move forward. 

“Sorry. I’m just tired. Had coffee too late yesterday, couldn't sleep.” You mumbled, turning your attention back to the ceramic bowl in front of you. Your thoughts wandered, briefly, to the fact that since you’d moved in, there hadn’t been a single day where there wasn’t a box of your favorite cereal in the pantry. You really must have been feeling the complete lack of sleep, because that thought alone almost had you tearing up. 

“Come to training today. María is out on the grass, again, you can watch.” Ingrid suggested softly. 

You shook your head though, swallowing the lump in your throat. You didn’t want to be far from them, but you also knew that if they kept being so nice to you, you weren’t going to be able to keep it together. 

“I’m really tired, I just want to stay here.” You replied.  Ingrid looked like she wanted to argue, but Mapi nodded from where she stood at the fridge, filling her water.

“That’s okay. Stay here, have a chill day. We’ll be back after lunch.” She walked over to you, squeezing your shoulder kindly. The Spaniard said goodbye, before exiting the kitchen. Ingrid hung back, not really caring at all that she might make them late. 

Your sister stood from her spot at the table, and you mumbled a quiet goodbye, only looking up when she came to stand right next to you. Her hand pulled your hood down, her fingers tilting your chin up to look at her. Her face was pinched with concern, and you felt a pang of guilt that you were doing this again. Making them worry about you. 

“Try to sleep or something? You looked exhausted, sweetheart. No runs or hikes or climbs, please. Just stay here?” Ingrid asked, making sure to frame her request as a question, and not a command. 

“Okay.” You agreed, far too tired to even think about any of those things. You knew Ingrid just wanted you to stay where she knew you were, which was fine. You were honestly just surprised she hadn’t dragged you to training with her. 

She lightly patted your cheek, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Be good. I love you.” 

“Love you too. Play safe.” 

You were wide awake, completely wired. Even as everything inside of you told you that you should be tired, you felt like you might never sleep again. You kept your promise to your sister, though, collapsing onto the couch and putting a show on. Scout came to lay with you, falling asleep easily in your lap. You were jealous of your dog, you realized. It was an amusing thought, but all you felt was… Empty. Nothing. Because if you let yourself laugh, you were sure it would turn into sobs, and you couldn’t do that. 

You just had to be strong.

-------

You got into bed early that night, hoping that the added time laying down would help you fall asleep. You were so exhausted, truly, but as you laid in bed at 8pm, you knew instinctively that you wouldn’t be able to sleep again. Everytime you drifted off, your thoughts drifted too, and you’d jerk awake, struck with a reminder of what Camila had said. Her words were haunting you. Everytime you closed your eyes, you could see the sneer on her face as she spoke, and hear the cruel words she’d spoken. 

You were beginning to think she was right about you. How were you so screwed up after a relationship ended that had only lasted a few weeks to begin with? You thought you loved her, yes, but you were being dramatic. You shouldn’t be this devastated, and in your head, this only reinforced that idea that Camila had been right. You were too immature. You were too messed up. No one was ever going to want to deal with you. 

A soft knock on your door dragged you out of your thoughts, thankfully. 

“Come in,” you called. Mapi pushed the door open, taking in the rather unnaturally clean room around her. You’d gone crazy cleaning the night before, putting away all the clothes strewn across the floor. It was neat and clutter free in there now, and Mapi’s heart melted at the sight of the framed photo on your nightstand. It was of the three of you, a candid that Frido had taken after a match. It was little things like this that made Mapi deeply happy, and deeply sad all at once. For six months you’d lived here, and they’d given you the space they thought you needed. It was so far from what you actually needed, though, and Mapi couldn’t help the guilt that filled her at the thought. All she and Ingrid could do now, though, was do better. 

So, she entered your room, holding out a mug towards you. It was the one she’d picked out at Ikea, the one with the map and the sun. You knew for a fact that you’d used it this morning for your coffee, which meant Mapi must have pulled it out of the dishwasher and hand washed it herself, so she could bring it up to you. 

“I made you tea.” She said, taking a seat on the edge of your bed as you grabbed the mug from her. 

“Did you think caffeine would help me sleep?” You asked skeptically. 

She rolled her eyes. “No, idiota, it is sleepytime tea. There’s no caffeine.” 

You took a cautious sip, smiling a bit when you liked the taste. 

“My mami always made it for me when I couldn’t sleep.” Mapi said quietly. “Thought it might help tonight since you decided to become nocturnal yesterday.” 

Ingrid and Mapi really toed the line of parent vs. sister / guardian. It was often a sisterly relationship, you thought, with both of them. When you would tease each other, or argue about borrowing their clothes. Other times, it felt completely parent-y. When they’d make you go to bed early, or annoy you about studying for a test. 

This situation definitely fell into the latter category, and you found that you minded it less and less. 

“It’s good.” You told her, taking another sip. “And I didn’t decide to become nocturnal. It just kind of happened.”

Mapi hummed, looking around the room again. You just had the string lights above your bed on, the room lit also by the soft glow of the TV, as your favorite sitcom played. You’d lit a candle, and you were bundled up under the covers of your bed, clearly trying hard to be comfortable. Clearly trying very hard to sleep. 

You looked so tired, it made her heart ache, and she knew Ingrid felt the same. Ingrid, who Mapi was absolutely sure was hovering outside the door, not wanting to overwhelm you. You seemed… fragile. Like you were one step away from breaking at any given moment, and neither of them wanted that to happen before you were ready. Ingrid was just as worried about you, though, and she’d only agreed not to go in if Mapi promised to make you promise something. 

“Can you promise to wake us up tonight if you can’t sleep?” Mapi said finally, looking intently at you. 

With a sigh, you shrugged. “What good would that do?”

“You wouldn’t have to be alone.” Mapi said simply, watching as a flicker of emotion flashed across your face. You didn’t have to be alone anymore. Sometimes you forgot. “If you don’t promise, Ingrid is probably going to come in here every hour or something and check on you.” 

With a roll of your eyes, and a big sigh that you didn’t really mean, you nodded. “Fine.” 

“Good.” Mapi grinned. “Goodnight, mi sol. Te quiero.” 

“Goodnight.” You replied. “Tell Ingrid in the hall goodnight too.” 

The Spaniard chuckled. “I will. Sleep tight.”

With that, she leaned down, pressing a kiss onto your forehead, before she slipped out of the room. Hushed whispers came from the hall and you smiled to yourself, just a bit. Ingrid was such a weirdo sometimes. 

-------

It was around 2am when you broke. You’d tried everything you could think of to fall asleep, and nothing had worked. Worse, the lack of sleep was really getting to you and you were feeling ridiculously emotional. When you promised Mapi you’d wake them up if you couldn’t sleep again, you hadn’t meant it. Now, though, as you lay awake in your bed, tears threatening to fall, you really didn’t want to be alone. You weren’t sure how they could help, or even if you wanted help, but you knew that the indisputably healthy choice to make here would be to go to them. And you were trying to be better for yourself. 

Even as Camila’s words rattled around in your head, and you were half convinced you were an awful person, about to become even worse by waking Ingrid and Mapi up, you got up from your bed, and walked down the hall. 

There were a lot of notable moments in your time in Spain. A lot of them consisted of long, emotional talks with Ingrid and Mapi. And you knew that this was likely what you were headed for. It was naive to think you could hold everything that had happened in, keep it all to yourself. Especially when you’d kind of gotten used to sharing things with them, as horrifying as that thought was. You weren’t nervous, like usual, though. You just wanted them to tell you that everything she’d said was wrong. 

Scout followed you down the hall, slightly annoyed that you’d woken him up when you got up. He liked to sleep with some part of him touching you, so it was inevitable that when you woke, Scout did too. Your sister’s bedroom door was open, and you peeked in, half second guessing yourself. Both of them were asleep. It was a cool night, by Barcelona’s standards, which was obvious by Mapi’s sweatshirt and sweatpants that she’d worn to bed, as well as the extra blanket pulled over her. Ingrid, on the other hand, had kicked the comforter off of her, sleeping in just a tshirt and shorts. They were laying facing each other, their hands tangled together, like they’d fallen asleep talking. 

They were sleeping. They’d had a long week. They had training the following day. You shouldn’t wake them. They looked comfortable and peaceful, and you shouldn’t ruin that. You turned to go back to your room, biting your lip to stop yourself from crying at how utterly alone you suddenly felt. 

You were sure you hadn’t made any noise, but still, a whispered voice stopped you in your tracks. 

“Solstråle?” Ingrid asked quietly, sitting up and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing, go back to sleep.” You said, trying to keep your voice steady. It evidently didn’t work, because not a second later, Ingrid was flicking the lamp on, looking at you with a sympathetic expression on her face. Next to your sister, her girlfriend huffed in annoyance, still practically asleep, pulling the covers up and over her head. Ingrid rolled her eyes, before fixing her attention back on you.

“Come here.” Ingrid instructed, gesturing you closer to the bed. You walked over, feeling ridiculously like a small child waking their parents up after a bad dream. “You can’t sleep?”

“No.” You said miserably, roughly wiping away a stray tear. 

“How can I help? Do you want to talk?” She asked worriedly, brutally kicking Mapi in the shin as she did so, thinking that her girlfriend would be somewhat helpful in this situation, even if she was half asleep. The Spaniard grumbled unhappily, but emerged from under the covers just as you responded. 

“I don’t know, I just can’t stop thinking about her.” You whispered, truly not confident that anything could make you feel better in that moment. 

Mapi sat up, patting the middle of the bed invitingly. It was a king, and there was plenty of room, but you looked between her and Ingrid skeptically. 

“I’m not a child.” You said a bit harshly, thinking of Camila calling you immature. If only she could see you now. 

“We know. You just broke up with your girlfriend, though, and you haven’t slept in over a day. You are sad and exhausted, and it isn’t childish to need help.” Mapi said kindly, very dramatically scooching over so there was more room for you. 

You floundered for a minute, not quite sure what to do. You were an adult. An adult. And Ingrid and Mapi were not your parents. The appeal was there, though, to climb into the bed and tell them everything. To let yourself break when you knew they’d keep track of all the pieces, and put you back together. “Can I have more tea?” You blurted out, looking at Mapi. You weren’t really sure where that came from, but she nodded enthusiastically, rising from the bed, practically taking off for the kitchen in a sprint. 

“I’ll go make some!” 

You turned back to Ingrid, chewing aggressively on your lip. She rolled her eyes at you, teasingly, before she pointendly looked between you and the bed. 

“Get in the damn bed.” Ingrid sighed. It was easier, when she was telling you exactly what to do, because you didn’t have to worry about picking the wrong answer. You settled on the bed, right in the middle, and Ingrid threw an arm around your shoulders, pulling you to lean your head on her shoulder. 

“Ingrid?” You said after a minute, so quietly, your sister almost missed it. 

“Hmm?” 

“Do you think I’m immature?” You asked. 

Ingrid thought for a moment. “No. I think you’ve had to grow up really fast, and you’ve had to make a lot of big adjustments. You are more mature because of all of that. Why?”

You knew she would hate what you were going to say. “Camila said I was.” 

Ingrid grew tense next to you. “That’s because she was a 26 year old woman dating an 18 year old. What was she fucking expecting?” Ingrid said venomously. 

Mapi walked back into the room, taking care to be quiet, as it looked like you were deep in thought. She placed the mug of tea on her nightstand before she sat on the bed next to you, turning so she could see your face.

“Did she say anything else?” Ingrid asked cautiously. 

You opened your mouth to tell her that, no, Camila hadn’t said anything else. Instead, words flowed out of your mouth that you hadn’t decided to say, but you were unable to contain them. “She called me jealous and immature. She said the ‘mommy issues’ were really obvious, that I was insecure and clingy, and that I wasn’t worth it. That no one would want to put up with me.” 

You said it so forlornly, so resigned to what this awful woman had told you, Ingrid felt an anger she’d never experienced before rise within her. Neither she nor Mapi knew what to say right away, collecting their thoughts. You broke the silence again, though, after only a few seconds. 

“I think she’s right.” You said, your voice breaking clearly. You pressed your hands to your face, body shaking with silent sobs. 

“No, mi sol, no,” Mapi said softly, scooting closer to rest a hand on your knee. 

Ingrid took a breath, trying to swallow her anger, rubbing your arm with her hand comfortingly. “Solstråle, you are none of those things. That awful woman has no idea who you are, not really. You are not immature, you are 18. There is a huge difference. And you are so much more than what happened with mom. You are so many good things despite mom, sweetheart, and Camila doesn’t know what she’s talking about. She just wanted to hurt you, none of that is true.” Ingrid said insistently. 

“Why would she want to hurt me? I thought she liked me. I don’t understand.” You replied, still keeping your face hidden away in your hands. 

“Because she isn’t a good person, and she doesn’t deserve you. And you don’t understand because you are good, mi sol. So good.” 

“Then why do such horrible things keep happening?” You asked, voice raised slightly in frustration. You pulled your hands away from your face, looking between your sister and her girlfriend with a tearstained, bewildered face. “I’m trying to be good, I’m trying so hard, why is this so hard?”

Both girls felt their hearts break a little at your words. Ingrid wrapped both her arms around you, pulling you into her chest as you cried. “I know, Solstråle, it’s not fair. It’s going to get better. I promise you, it is.”

“I’m tired of everything being so hard.” You cried, shutting your eyes tightly as you spoke. You felt a soft hand brushing your hair away from your forehead, felt Ingrid leave a kiss on your forehead. “I’m tired.”

You meant it figuratively, and literally, and Mapi and Ingrid knew that very well. The best thing they could do for you now, would be to get you calm enough to sleep. It was happening without them trying very hard, honestly. You could barely keep your eyes open, even as soft sobs fell from your mouth. 

“It’s not going to be hard forever. I promise you, mi sol.” Mapi said, looking intently at you, though you didn’t look back at her. 

“I’m so tired.” You repeated, barely making sense. You were almost delirious with exhaustion, your emotional outburst only making it worse. 

“Sleep, solstråle. We are right here. Everything will feel better in the morning. You aren’t going to feel like this forever. Just relax, and sleep. We love you so much.” 

And even as you nodded, all the fight and worry of being too much for them flooding from your body, you wondered if they were right. If everything would feel better. 

If anyone would ever really want you. 

You drifted off ridiculously easily, curled up next to your sister, your brain going quiet for the first time in days. Once Ingrid was sure you were asleep, she turned to her girlfriend, who was tucking the blankets around you nice and tight. 

“I am going to kill that girl.” Ingrid murmured, feeling absurdly protective over you. 

“I will kill her first.” Mapi vowed. 

“She isn’t allowed to date again until she’s 50.” Ingrid said, a frown etched on her face. 

Mapi cracked a smile. “Good luck with that, mi amor.” 

Ingrid shook her head. “I can’t stand to see her like this.” 

The Spaniard turned serious again, nodding her agreement. “It’s gonna get better, Ingrid. It’s not going to be perfect, but she’s already better. She just needs time.” 

“I wish I could take it from her, so she could just be happy all the time.” Ingrid admitted, flicking the lamp off, her voice barely more than a whisper. 

“I do too.” Mapi whispered back. She and Ingrid looked at each other over your slumbering form, each seeing their exact feelings reflected in the other’s face, even with their features obscured by darkness. They just wanted things to be better for you. Easier and lighter and happier. They’d do anything, get you the moon if you wanted it. They didn’t consider if they were giving you all they could, that maybe you needed something else. They just promised themselves that they wouldn’t rest until you were happier, whatever it took. Whatever it took for you, because you were their sol, and nothing on earth was more important to them than your happiness. 

-------

my name is girlgenius1111 and i like to make my fictional kid suffer give me all your thoughts on this installment of sol ☀️

#woso imagine #woso x reader #ingrid engen x mapí leon #ingrid engen x reader #mapi leon x reader #engen!reader #platonic reader #🍓☀️ #woso one shot #woso fanfics

[wilwheaton]

what are your hobbies?

I have a garden that I love to work in every day.

During the lockdowns, I learned the difference between having a garden, and tending a garden. It turns out that I just love to tend my garden. I love to walk in it, smell all the smells, prune it and tie it up where it needs it, keep the soil healthy, and leave it alone when I've done enough.

In a lot of ways, I use my gardening time as a metaphor. One that was particularly meaningful to me lately came when I was pruning this feral tomato that showed up in one of my beds late last year. As a general rule, when I get any volunteers, I leave them alone, except to keep them away from things I've planted myself. But in this case, it was growing so fast and getting so out of control, I had to rein it in a bit, with some pruning and gentle redirection of the parts which were tied to the trellis.

I started thinking about the individual stalks as parts of my life experience: here's one that doesn't have anything growing on it, but if I follow it all the way to this point, I can see that it's providing support and nutrients to this huge, thriving, massively flowering hunk of the plant. It turns out that part may look like it isn't doing anything, but without it, this other part that's gorgeous wouldn't exist.

I could have just looked at it and seen a stalk that wasn't doing anything. I could have easily pruned it right then and there, and only after would I have discovered this lush, thriving, beautiful part of the plant that can't exist without this other part. I was so grateful that I took the time to look at the whole thing, to see that bare stem in context, to appreciate it.

I don't know if this particular metaphor lands on you, but it landed real hard on me. It inspired a wonderful moment of reflection and gratitude, and I also got excited for the ... I mean, it's at least a dozen, but maybe more ... little cherry tomatoes I'm going to get when they finish ripening.

I have recently noticed that, as long as I can remember, I have felt like I can't slow down, like I can't take time for myself, that I should always be working or trying to work. I've been working on healing as much of my CPTSD as I can, and part of that includes doing my best to give myself permission to slow down, to take entire days or even weeks off, because I have earned it. It's such a struggle for me.

And that's where my garden is a metaphor again: it may not be full of blooming flowers or tons of vegetables right now, but that doesn't mean it isn't growing. Maybe it needs to be watered and fed today, and tomorrow, I can just walk through it, and enjoy it.

It's one of my very few hobbies that are mostly private, that I keep for myself. I freely and enthusiastically share my love for classic arcade gaming, Tabletop and RPG games, and all my super nerd shit, so I like that I have this one thing that's just for me.

[ririblogsss]

Damian and the strays

ok look we all know the de aged dani (Danny and Dan). But what if we have siblings/ triplets, and I mean what if we take them all the same age (15/16) and make them into the most powerful trio in school . I mean you have 3 good looking individuals all siblings and in the same way, they all excel in different things (Dan-world history, Dani/Ellie- science Sports, Danny physics), but they are all so easy going and charming plus they are all jacked af.

Like tell me if i'm wrong but they would be beloved maybe popular on the downlow until they do something only fentons would risk doing. For example, orchestrating that every monday at 12:30 am the fire alarms would start and lunch would be extended for an hour more. No one can prove it, but none of them have doubts either. The triplets have their own groups but they mainly hang out with each other if you see one the other 2 are close by. 

Anyways i'm thinking that one day they will actually see why the Fenton siblings are observed closely by the teacher and try to make sure they don't cause mayhem.  One guy, a chad of sorts, decided he wanted to pick a fight with Dante, the more violent of the siblings. Chad didn't even finish his first insult before he was slammed through the door by Danny, who was arguably the pacifist of the 3. But the student body kind of got it. The thing is no one expected Dani (preferred name Ellie) to freaking pummel the guy.

No one saw them at school again. 

It went on like this: the trio would move to one school.Would play pranks on the administration and have fun. Then someone would try something on one of them and the other 2 would pummel the person into the ground. The next day they would be gone never to return. They became an urban legend in some of the schools. 

Until they came to Gotham Academy when they tried their pranks a kid would come and stop them. It was getting on their nerves. All their freaking plans down the drain all because of a snobby brat that didn't know how to mind his own.  Eventually they start pranking the kid instead of the school as a revenge for ruining their fun. This leads to an all out prank war between all 4 of them (Dan backstabbed Danny and Ellie first they just followed the lead). 

Soon enough the 3 of them became friends with Damian (they learned his name 4 weeks after the prank war started). The school body was half convinced that Damian and the triplets were actually long lost siblings. I mean they all have black hair, anger issues and green bluish eyes. Damian knew for a fact that he wasn't related to the Fentons; a DNA test concluded this. But that didn't mean that Damian didn't perceive the triplets as family. 

Damian concludes that even if they aren't adopted into the family the Fentons belong. So that's why one day Damian brings Ellie, Danny and Dante to the family reunion. Where every relative and not so relative is there. Damian is showing them around, pointing at things around the house as a mini tour, and people are starting to notice that there are 3 new faces that they have never seen before. 

there are whispers like: ‘really?! AGAIN?!?’ or “WOW im gone for 5 days and he got 3 more”  and even  ‘Damn so black hair, teen and probably sad backstory is the type’

The triplets looked at eachother looked at Damian and smiled like starved piranhas that have just been served a pound of meat and are ready to devore. Damian reflects it with his own devilish smile.

 So all four of them start saying things out of context such as: 

“I'm so glad to be here now” 

“Yeah same we wouldn't have survived that hell of a chamber without you Dames”

“As long as we're no longer hunted for merely existing I don't mind staying for a while”

“Good things there weren't any actual bazookas that could have gone worse”

All four knew that out of context it seemed like the 3 siblings had been hunted and captured by some unknown person and Damian had rescued them and brought them home, but in reality they were just talking about the past paintball match they had earlier that morning. 

So Bruce wanted to know some more but the rhetorical bullet, and asked “Damian… who, who are these kids” Damian proceeded to scoff and say “Why our new family members, truly father, are you incompetent. This is a family reunion hence only family or perceived family is invited” Damian tried to channel his inner 10 year old self whilst trying not to laugh. Danny and Ellie were on the same boat except they made their faces look devastated with tears in their eyes and everything looked pitiful, but on the inside they were laughing their asses off. Dante feigned indifference but he had teary eyes, from trying to stop himself from hitting the floor laughing at the devastated faces around. 

Danny played his act up clearing his throat “we- we can leave if I mean we didn't know, yeah Dami said it was fine but we understand” he purposely made his voice crack to show how ‘hurt’ he was. 

Ellie made herself look small so she could seem self conscious and uncomfortable with the situation. 

Dante solidified them with the small sniffles he let out every few seconds. 

Damian was looking to the ground to avoid being read, because right now he was shaking from laughter, and it would be clear in his face but if he angled himself right (which he did) it looked like he was silently sobbing. Danny put his arm around his shoulder, also looking towards the ground, also shaking from laughter. Dante and Ellie joined in. From an outside perspective it looked like they were extremely upset not being able to be family. 

Bruce panicked seeing his younger child and 3 other kids the same age all begin to cry he just blurted out “NO no that not what i meant Damian I ment their names what are their names, and does Babs have to get involved so we can have documentation”

Damian cleared his tears and looked up at his father trying not to smirk “He is Dante, that one is Dani with an I but she prefers Ellie and that lanky one is Danny” Bruce nodded and went out the room to see if he could get started on the documents. 

Once Bruce was out of the room all 4 of them burst out laughing, falling into a pile some were heard wheezing, others having maniacal laughter. 

Once they finally stopped and looked at the rest of the family all four of them eerily said “he won't ever believe you” And everyone in the room shuddered. This quartet was going to bring wayyyy too much mischief into the family. 

(if you're wondering where jazz is. She's in college living her best life. I mean she is a highly independent person she thrives of off living alone with a clear schedule set)

—

Also i didn't put any specific names for the previous schools or the family members bc I thought it would be better for u guys to decide who witnessed the beginning of the end. 

#dc x dp #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc #dpxdc #dc x dp crossover #Damian only started this #as a way to stop the triplets from becoming rouges #The tripplets love chaos #Im 100% sure Bruce will absolutely do everything in his power to avoid heart felt convos #Cass was there and and knew abt the act but didn't say anything. She's taking them to the theater to see heathers

[bucksboobs]

On their way to a fire, Buck opens his big mouth and says something very stupid. Not an unusual occurrence but this one is unique: “Hey, Hen? Can I ask you a gay people question?”

Hen side-eyes him. “Are you sure now’s the best time?” The engine shakes on its suspension.

Buck blusters forward. “So Tommy and I have been dating a month and a half now.” The mention of Tommy grabs both Chim and Eddie’s attention.

“Wait, really?” Chim asks, Hen’s not sure if he thought it was shorter or longer than that. His memory of time seems to be the worst hit by the encephalitis.

“2 months next Thursday.” Eddie says.

“Y-yeah… that’s right.” Buck raises his eyebrows at Eddie. The rest all stare, Hen included. Those two have always been locked at the hip but knowing each other’s anniversaries seems excessive. Buck seems to agree.

“How do you know that?” She asks.

“Their first date was the same day I asked Marisol to move in with me.”

“When did Marisol move in with you?” Hen and Chimney ask in unison. Last she heard about Marisol she had only just met Chris, moving in seemed a long way off for them. Since when was she living with him?

“She didn’t” Bobby answers, giving his sternest glare to the rear view mirror. Hen knows this means she’s in charge of keeping these fools in check so he can focus on driving.

“Yeah we decided against that. Anyway Buck you were talking about Tommy?” Hen stifles a laugh. There was a story there she was going to have to wring out of Bobby because Eddie’s deflection abilities are legendary.

“Yeah so- um- ho-how long before we can uh…”Hen cocks her head. What exactly is Buck after with Tommy right now, they’re not nearly to the point of I love yous and she doesn’t think Buck would be this nervous about dating advice. “I mean how long did you and Karen wait until you, uh” Oh.

“Had sex?” Hen asks bluntly.

“Whoa, you and Tommy haven’t had sex yet?” Chimney asks, astonished.

“Buck when’s the last time you waited this long with anyone?” Eddie asks with a cocked eyebrow.

“Never? Maybe high school?” That tracks.

“Or Abby.” Chim offers. Buck winces at that. She knows that woman did him dirty, looks like the scar still aches.

“Six minutes to ETA.” Comes from the drivers seat. “5 and a half…” Bobby takes a sharp turn that shakes the whole truck. “5 minutes.”

“So how do I ask him to fuck me.”

A chorus of “BUCK!” rings through the truck. Eddie looks petrified at the idea of his best friends having sex with each other, Chim looks exhausted with his brother-in-law of barely a month and look, Hen would give the world to see this kid happy but sometimes he’s just too stupid for his own good.

“Buck. I think you need to remember Tommy doesn’t have a lot of experience in this area either.”

“He doesn’t?”

“Did you forget he’s only been out as long as you’ve been at the 118?” Hen learned that about Tommy from Buck’s gushing the day after the wedding. She’d also talked to him in a fluorescent lit waiting room after the most gorgeous hospital ceremony she’s ever been a part of, so she’s aware that he’s not used to being with men that want more than just sex from him. “He might think you’re just as nervous as he is.”

“I didn’t know he got nervous.”

Chim huffs at that. “Next time you see him ask him to tell you a story about a rooster.” That makes Hen smile.

“He probably won’t believe you’re ready until you can talk to him about it.”

“I don’t— I-it usually just kind of happens. You get a look, there’s a nod, they look at your lips and lean in…”

“Yeah but that was women who knew what they wanted and what you wanted. Tommy won’t know unless you tell him what you’re ready for.”

“So to get him to fuck me I have to tell him to fuck me?”

“Jesus, Buck. Yes.” Hen laughs. They are, thankfully, finally pulling to site so she doesn’t have to enumerate exactly how he needs to ask. If she did she’d have to explain birds and bees that she is not the best person to explain.

“Come on, kids, let’s save some lives.” Bobby calls as he pulls the parking break.

The fire looks pretty bad, two story house, they’ll have to split up by floor. As they gear up Buck says, privately, off-mic. “Thanks Hen, you’re a good Gay Yoda”

“Do him or do not, there is no try.”

#Henrietta Wilson #Evan Buckley #BuckTommy #little ficlet of the wlw/mlm solidarity that I couldn’t get out of my head #I tried Hen PoV let me know what you think!!!

[subformuscularalpha]

"Finally you are home. Come here, habibi" Amir met me as I got home after a long day at university.

"I'm tired", I looked at him with a begging look.

"Oh, boy, it's bad. But I think you should have already learnt that my need come first", he looked at me with a serious face. "Get down", he said in a calm but commanding tone.

I threw my backpack on the chair and got down on my knees between Amir's massive thighs.

"That's my obedient boy", he put his naked feet on the table, "Give them a nice massage".

His size 13 feet were huge and covered with some hairs on the upper side and on the toes. I put my hands on one of them and started caressing it.

"Mmm, I love how eager you are to submit to me. You like you place, don't you?"

"I do, my sayyid" I replied looking him into the eyes but without stopping the movements of my hands.

"Good", he smiled and leaned back, while I continued the massage.

I thoughtfully massages each inch of his huge sole and then up to his ancles. It was so humiliating but at the same time it was also a possibility for me to enjoy his body and to show him my respect.

After I repeated the same procedure with his other foot, Amir leaned to me and patted me on the cheek, "Good boy. Now, stand up and strip completely for me”.

I didnas ordered and in a bare moment I was standing naked in front of Amir. Every inch of my soft body was on display for him. All vulnerable and waiting with anticipation of what was about to follow.

“Much better now”, he smirked, “Get here, boy”.

I approached him and climbed on his thighs. With legs spread wide around his waist I sat on his laps, facing him. The head of his growing shaft rubbed through the fabric of his shorts against my exposed hole.

Amir grabbed my head from behind and pulled me into a deep passionate kiss. He reached down teasingly trailing his fingers along my torso. His large hands grabbed my butt cheeks and squeezed them. Then his finger pressed against my entrance, sending a stroke of sensation through my body.

I pulled up Amir's t-shirt to get a hold of his warm firm body. I run my fingers over the edges of his hairy abs. Then I slid my hands up to his massive chest. Amir flexed his pecs and then broke our kiss. Just for a moment to pull off his t-shirt and throw it away. Then he got back to kissing me even with more passion.

My petite body was now pressed against Amir's muscular one. His body hair was scratching against my smooth skin. At the same time my master's thick finger was playing with my ass.

I moved my hands up and tried to put them around Amir's broad back. He was too big. My hands couldn't even reach each other around him.

Every part of Amir's body was huge. Even his fingers. They were long and thick. For comparison, his little finger was the size of my middle and even thicker. Each movement of it inside of my ass ignited fire inside of me, making my small dicklet harder. I was close to cum and Amir knew that. He broke the kiss and looked deeply into my eyes, sending an unspoken message of dominance.

"Hold it, boy. You should learn to control your desires", he continued fingering my hole, teasing that spot deep inside of me.

I moaned and bit my lower lip, "I try... but I can't". I pressed myself closer to Amir's firm body and my cock rubbed against his hairy abs. At the same time the thick finger inside of my ass hit that spot again and I lost control over myself. "I'm sorry..." My dicklet throbbed and spilled a few loads of cum on Amir's torso.

Amir just chuckled, "No need to be sorry, habibi. That little accident only shows how much control I have over you. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't be punished. Right, boy?"

"Yes, Sir", I replied and lowered my head to his abs, already knowing what I have to do. After licking his stomach clean I looked up at him like a dog who brought a stick to his master and is waiting for the next command.

"Good. But you know, it's not all"

I nodded, "I know, Sir. I deserve a real punishment" I lay down on his lap with my ass posed up to him, right in between his thighs.

"I hate to do it because it takes so much time", he gave me a slap, "But you know it's for yours own good, right?" he slapped me again.

"Yes..." I replied.

He continued spanking my ass. His smacks were firm and powerful. They made my whole body flinch. Each slap hurt more than the previous one and they came one directly after another without letting my skin cool down.

#master #alpha #arab #hairy #muscular

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for breaking up with my partners over such a small thing?

🩼🩼🩼 so I can spot this

I often break things off with my partners. They often don’t want to talk to me after, and I understand that, but I still want to be friends with them.

If they don’t want that, I understand that too. They want space - I give them space. I view it as we tried something and it didn’t work.

Would that make me an asshole still wanting to be friends? No idea.

Even so - there is more to why I break things off with my partners that I tend not to bring up at the final moment because I know it will upset them and perhaps ruin that friendship.

Some back story - I have a chronic illness which causes chronic pain. I can have seizures that can go on for 20 mins or longer, I periodically loose my ability to walk, and the big one is I can’t be touched without asking. (This includes my cane please never touch my cane without asking thank you)

Essentially- all of the nerves in my body are hypersensitive. Without going into too much detail, essentially my brain got stuck in fight or flight mode so the proverbial ‘alarm bells’ are ringing all the time, when in reality I’m safe and well. This means my body tries to defend me by ‘playing dead’ (seizures, fainting, drops) or thinks I’ve been badly injured (chronic pain).

When I first developed this illness, I could barely ware clothes, let alone be touched. I worked up to hugging my family again over a 2 year period with a lot of help from my mum - bless her heart. It was really hard for my family - but they worked through it with me. And what helped was they’re not physical people anyway. We don’t hug that much.

Now, I can be touched unless I am told before hand. Hooray! Surprise touch is agonising.

Though - both of the partners I’ve had in the past don’t seem to get this, and get upset when I ask them to ask before hand. They argue that I’m their partner and they can hug me when they want too, and want me to be more physical with them.

And yeah I suppose they can but at the same time surprise touch I can feel on my skin for hours at a time. It really hurts.

Also, if I have a seizure and ask for them to come find me or for comfort, they don’t know what to say, can’t come because they’re busy or don’t want to say the Same things over and over too me. When in reality, I’ve just had my brain fried and just need someone to tell me I’m safe because my brain is still convinced I’m in mortal danger.

I understand that being in a relationship with someone who has disabilities like mine can be hard. I often emphasise to them that my mental health is not their responsibility, and I have a counsellor that I regularly see to help me through the complexities of my illness and the toll it has on my mental health. I often encourage them if they’re really struggling with my illness to talk to helplines about and for my illness if I’m too sick to help them in that moment. They deserve support even if I’m not there or if it’s unrelated to my illnesses.

Quite often when I break things off - it’s because I can’t give them what they need because of my illness. If they like physical affection - which they often do - I can’t give it to them outside of the home or without asking before hand.

At the end of the day - I still want to be friends with them and I think they’re wonderful people. It’s just I can’t give them what they need, and they also can’t be there for me during my bad moments because the type of comfort I need is emotional, rather than physical.

At worse, touch me and I will scream it hurts that bad. People don’t seem to understand this.

Anyway. AITA? What can I do to communicate my needs better in the future? I view all my relationships as learning opportunities to be a better partner in future - and if you guys have any ideas on how to approach disabled / inter-abled relationships, I’d love to hear them.

All the best :)

#aita #am i the asshole

[suashii]

— 𝒷𝒶𝒹 𝓇𝑒𝓅𝓊𝓉𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 ౨ৎ

haitani rindou x reader. 1.3k w.c. ﾉ sfw ﾉ fluff ﾉ college au-ish :3 ﾉ just some rindou lovin' ﾉ repost!

it’s been a while since you've been out with your friends. can you really call them that, though? they are classmates at the very least, ones that feel compelled to invite you to their gatherings. it’s thoughtful, you’ll give them that, but part of you wishes they didn’t. maybe the outing is just boring or maybe they have all grown dull, but either way, it’s easy to zone out in their presence. their chatter seems distant. you don’t even really know what they’re talking about—something regarding everyone’s plans for this saturday.

“what about you?” the girl beside you nudges your ribs to gain your attention—and it works. the jab is surprisingly painful given how small she is. “can you make it?”

“sorry, i already have plans with someone else.”

“aww,” she whines at your answer, “who are you hanging out with? maybe they can tag along.”

“rindou.”

all the idle chatter at the table stops upon the mere utterance of his name. suddenly, all eyes are on you. he’s popular, but not for the right reasons. not many people are fond of him. and you never minded that, but the people who dislike him don’t just dislike him; they’re afraid of him. so although you have no problem associating yourself with him, you’ve learned quickly that bringing him up around others often leads to unsavory reactions. you slipped up at this moment.

“you mean… haitani rindou?”

“mhm.” you’re aware of the common consensus when it comes to rindou and what people think of him, but you want to test the waters and see how your peers perceive him. “why? what’s wrong with him?”

the replies flood in like a tsunami.

“he only hangs out with his brother and you know how much trouble ran is.”

“yeah, they’re total scumbags. i’m pretty sure they’ve almost gotten arrested—and on multiple occasions at that.”

“you’re perfectly capable of surrounding yourself with better company. why on earth would you want to be seen with him?”

“that’s really none of your concern.” the last comment strikes a nerve and causes you to raise your voice. shocked eyes accompanied by gaping mouths stare at you in surprise. you don’t know why you expected their responses to be any different. everyone jumps to the same conclusion and they aren’t an exception. their feelings about him are crystal clear. if they think so poorly of him, they have no place in your life. “and i’d rather not talk to you guys if you’re going to continue to speak about him like that. i’m leaving now.”

and with that, you stand up, collect your things, and start on your way home.

• • •

rindou is in the kitchen when you walk through the door. a head of blonde hair sits at the small table, slurping up ramen noodles. the steam wafting from the bowl leaves the lenses of his gold-framed glasses foggy. your keys clatter when they meet the ceramic of the dish that holds little things like chapstick and mini box cutters. the noise grabs rindou’s attention, his gaze abandoning his food in favor of looking at your figure that approaches to take a seat next to him. he didn’t think he would see you back so soon; it felt like you had just left. but he doesn’t say a word, instead, offering you the noodles hanging from his chopsticks. you lean forward to accept the mouthful of spicy ramen. every other bite of what remains in the bowl is reserved for you.

you stay attached to his hip for the rest of the day; helping him wash the dishes even though it’s your least favorite chore, sitting in his lap and snuggling into his neck as he boots up his computer to play who knows what game with his friends—you even go as far as getting comfortable on the lid of the toilet while he takes his shower for the night. it isn’t unusual for you to take care of his hair once he emerges from the steamy room, combing out the tangled strands of blonde and blue before pulling out the hair dryer. after the locks are fluffy and dry, his hair sits in a neat bun on the top of his head. the only pieces that escape are the ones not quite long enough to be tied up with the rest.

you wonder if your actions came off as overbearing; not that you would care if they did. the conversation from earlier reminded you of how poorly people regarded your boyfriend. someone has to love him when everyone else thinks so little of him, and you’re more than happy to be that person.

and you’re content at the moment, practically lying on top of him, your fingers tracing each curve of the black ink tattooed into his skin. you can feel the thumping of his heart, hear the rhythmic beat of it in your ear.

“what’s wrong?” rindou speaks up out of the blue. so then he had noticed the shift in your behavior.

“what do you mean?” you feign ignorance. you know rindou was fully aware of his reputation, but that doesn’t stop you from wanting to shield him from the harshness of others.

“you’re even clingier than usual.”

“i’m not clingy,” you mumble against his chest.

“mm, yeah, you are.” he pinches your cheek that isn’t pressed against him. it doesn’t hurt but you look up at him regardless. lilac eyes peer down at you. the blank expression on his face may not show it, but his gaze is enough to tell you that he’s concerned. “are you gonna tell me what happened or not?”

rindou isn’t the type to push you, to make you tell him something you aren’t ready to tell. if you told him you didn’t want to talk about it, you were sure he’d let it go. but since it’s weighing so heavily on your mind, maybe it is best to share. “i brought your name up in front of some classmates and they said some pretty rude stuff about you.”

he snorts as if what you were worried about was silly. and to him, it is. it doesn’t bother him—the wandering eyes, the hushed whispers, the anxious avoidance. everything that you seem to be hyperaware of is the norm for rindou. and he can understand why it upsets you, he wouldn’t want people speaking ill of you, but he’s accustomed to his bad reputation. “i thought i told you not to let stuff like that get to you. you know i don’t give a shit about what people think.”

“well, i do.” maybe you shouldn’t, not to the extent you do, anyway. but after getting to know rindou, the real rindou, you can’t help but feel offended when people reduce him to nothing more than a no-good criminal. sure, he isn’t a saint, but he’s far from evil. what gave them the right to form opinions when they only got a glimpse of one side of him? “they shouldn’t get to judge you if they don’t even know you.”

he lets out a heavy, dramatic sigh, the breath heaving from his chest causing your head to raise. though, not long after, his lips find their way to your hairline, pressing a light kiss to the skin. his hand runs up and down your arm, “it doesn’t matter how often i tell you, huh?”

“nope.” you shamelessly reply. you’ll never stand for people demeaning the man you’ve come to love.

“how stubborn,” he clicks his tongue. it’s clear that this was a matter he won’t be able to change your mind on. of course, he doesn’t care what people think about him, but seeing you so protective of him and his image is oddly endearing. “so what, are you my defender or something?”

“mhm,” you hum, letting your eyes drift shut, “now and always.”

thanks for reading! pls consider reblogging or commenting if u enjoyed :3

#₊˚ପ⊹ signed: tokyo revengers #rindou x reader #haitani rindou x reader #tokrev x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #rindou fluff #tokrev fluff #tokyo revengers fluff #rindou drabble #tokrev drabbles #tokyo revengers drabbles

[thowawayuntilfurthernotice]

So a Helluva Boss fan blog responded to one of my critical posts regarding the show and unlike other fan responses I’ve gotten in the past year, this one was interesting. 

Not that it managed to change my opinion about the show’s writing or Viv, but with how long winded it was. Seriously, it was the length of an average YouTube essay script. And while I was skimming through it, I began to wonder “Why is this fandom so defensive?”

Fans arguing about media online isn’t anything new, most fandoms these days are riddled with infighting, shipping discourse and pro shippers vs antis drama. But Viv’s fanbase is different in that they will go above and beyond when it comes to defending the show against criticism. 

I’m often labeled a “Viv anti” by her fans because I’m critical of her and her shows, which is hilarious given that outside of this blog, I rarely (if ever) discuss Viv or her shows. But because I’m critical of Viv and her shows, I’m labeled an “anti” by her fans. 

Now yes, I am aware that the reason why Viv’s fans see all criticism as negative is because Viv herself is incapable of accepting any criticism, but this fandom isn’t just satisfied with telling you that you’re wrong about their favorite show, they’re trying to convince you that Viv’s shows are works of genuine art that cannot be criticized. 

Look, I get people being passionate about the stuff that they like and I totally get criticizing genuine bad takes regarding media, but when you’re sending me an entire essay all because I criticized a dumb demon cartoon, then I’m going to  start to question what made you this defensive to begin with. 

And I’m saying all this as someone who likes a lot of universally despised media. I mean, for fuck’s sake, I still watch Rick and Morty. But I never felt the need to defend any of the stuff I like from online criticism because nine times out of ten, said criticism doesn’t ruin my enjoyment of the thing that I like. 

Hell, I’m even critical of the stuff that I like. Criticism isn’t this evil thing that needs to be extinguished whenever it rears its ugly head, it’s just a part of life. 

Nobody likes dealing with criticism or getting criticized, but it’s something we all have to learn to deal with. And here’s the thing, I’m not criticizing Viv or her shows in the vain attempt that she might listen to said criticism, it’s clear that she’s incapable of handling criticism. I criticize Viv because it’s legitimately shocking how much stuff people let her get away with. 

If any other creator acted the way she did or did the same things she did, the entire internet would collectively clutch their pearls in real time. But because it’s Viv, people just look the other way. 

Viv’s fanbase is so obsessed with maintaining the “indie darling” narrative that they’re letting Viv get away with so much egregious shit. 

#Vivziepop Critical #Helluva Boss Critical #Hazbin Hotel Critical #Spindlehorse Critical #Helluva Boss #Hazbin Hotel

[unoisveimved-un-proffesional]

(Warning: Disco Elysium spoilers) One of the greatest twists in all of fiction is learning that René is a fucking tsundere, and it, it really recontextualizes his interactions with Gaston, because he's not just a little gay on the side, they never say that, they say "It's him." The source is Gaston. And that is like, holy shit. It's so sad to, because Gaston never finds out. You notice after René is gone Gaston is not happy anymore, in fact he's really kind of depressed now that his buddy is gone, his super secret admirer, who threw nothing but insults at him, up until the day he went and passed away. Tragic old man yaoi real in Disco Elysium.

(gawking over this story under cut)

By the way, does anyone else notice the duo theme? Like, René and Gaston, Steban and Ulixes, Harry and Kim, what other ones, but they've all got an orange thing going on? Ruby and Klassje? The character dynamics kinda make me sick to think about actually, sick like when you're eating really rich cheese cake with several deep and intricate flavors, it's almost too much, it's so dense! UUUGH! Also like, Joyce, Kim, Dros, and René are all kind of equivalent to their respective ideologies right? Ultraliberal, Moralist, Communist, and Fascist. They're disillusioned soldiers of their ideology, and their respective power shows the state of that ideology, Kim is a cop who enforces the law, Joyce is very rich and influential, René is an old decaying symbol, and Dros is utterly defeated and has no hope, nearly forgotten, and they all hold some feelings and important perspectives on the revolution and the Moralintern's actions. I so badly want to write on the character dynamics, parallels, equivalents, and do deep dives on all of them and how they relate to different themes. I have some basic outlines made of scripts and stuff but like, I want to do something deeper, like a full video series even! That's what it deserves, I need to do it justice.

Like speaking of gay characters, Ruby and Klassje's relationship, and its tragic Yuri, I need to look into that. I mean she threw her under the bus! To the pigs! That is just sad! But she didn't feel like she had a choice and it's just agh! You know? Ugh. I need to schedule some time to write on this...

#disco elysium #disco elysium spoilers #hexacles.txt #pentacles talks #it's pronounced pen tuh cleese

[calumfmu]

could u maybe write an angst fic where steve leaves reader for nancy? based on traitor by olivia rodrigo. maybe she writes him a letter/song?

Yess baby of course. Here it is. Thank you for your long continued patience and for the others—I promise I’m getting to them.

2.4k; cw: cheating (but not really), swearing, angst, Steve’s a dick—and not in a cute way.

You had to admit to yourself that you knew it was always weird. How fast Steve had gone from pining over Nancy and always thinking about her to suddenly being interested in you. You thought it was a dream come true at first, something that he had finally came to his senses about. It had been years you had liked Steve, pining over him during high school, always pressed to the background, but always there.

Getting to know him was the easiest part of it all, learning the way that his body fit into you, like two pieces of the same puzzle. He was always sweet, so kind to you, called you beautiful even when you felt like it was your worst days. You loved Steve Harrington. Loved everything about him because you knew how deep his love could truly go. There was one thing though.

Your head sat against his chest, ear pressed to his sternum while he laid underneath you, half propped up on the couch. Your eyes were dropped low as he ran his fingers through your hair, trailing them along the hair at the nape of your neck, dancing over the skin. The hug you two found yourself in was lazy, but comfortable, a tangle of limbs that had it hard to decipher where one body ended and the other began.

“Don’t fall asleep on me now,” he whispered, laughing softly as you hummed at him. His calm heart beat was felt through his sweater, lulling you further into slumber.

“Shut up!”

Robin’s voice was heard from the kitchen—loud and brash—like it always was. The two of you heard the click of the receiver as she threw it down, her stomps announcing her arrival into the room.

“Hey Robin, when are you going to stop running my phone bill up?” Steve questioned, shrugging at her with a faux frown as she was wide eyed, hand on her stomach. You laughed at his words, knowing just how much he would rather have her in his house, running up any bill than anywhere else in the world.

“Oh quiet, you know you don’t even pay a single bill on this house,” she muttered, waving a hand to brush off his words.

You rubbed your head against his chest, turning slightly to look at her standing in front of you guys. Steve awaited her next words, eyebrows raised as she took a deep breath.

“You guys are never going to believe this,” she was grimacing her words, mouth exposing her teeth in an awkward fashion. She made a pause, pressing her hands in front of her in the air.

Steve raised a hand from your hair, urging her on before placing it on your back. “Well… spit it out.”

She rolled her eyes, “Jonathan and Nancy broke up. Like officially. Broke up, broke up.”

You waited for the next line, waited for some jaw dropping moment. Not having to wait long, your eyes crinkled in confusion, feeling Steve’s heartbeat beneath his chest kicking up a notch. He shifted below you, your head falling from its resting place as he sat up, suddenly.

“Wh-what do you mean?” His voice was concerned, slightly shaky as you sat up, rubbing your eye from where it had caught on his sweater in his hasty movement. Your side eye was lethal, boring into him as he was staring deeply into Robin’s eyes.

“I know! Isn’t that crazy?” She exclaimed, eyes wide as she waved her arms around.

You felt like the odd one out, chewing your bottom lip as she two of them discussed the separation. Clearing your throat, you closed in on yourself, clasping your hands at your waist.

“Can I ask—“ the two of them looked at you, cut off mid-speech. “Who’s Nancy?”

Robin’s eyes widened as she straightened up, mouth clamping shut as she briefly glanced at Steve. He was silent, staring down at his hands.

“Steve, you didn’t—“ she shook her head, briefly shutting her eyes. “She’s, uhh, how do I-? She’s Steve’s ex, well—friends now, but ex.”

You nodded, glancing over at him as he found interest in the couch, picking at a loose thread. It dawned on you that you were only aware of one person from his past, that girl he was with in high school, the reason why his reputation turned sour. The most you heard of her was from other people around town, brief memories of her from high school, everything but from Steve himself.

“Wait, Wheeler? Junior year Wheeler?” You questioned, confusion crossing your features. Steve cleared his throat, a loud cough that filled the awkward silence in the air.

“Yeah, that doesn’t matter now,” he said, ignoring the pointed look Robin gave the two of you, choosing to walk out of the room. “She’s just a friend now.”

You couldn’t help, but linger you gaze on him, doubting his words even as he leaned in to press a kiss to your forehead. There was a weird sting in your chest, a feeling that felt like a forewarning.

Your reflection stared back at you, a hollow ghost of a shell as you applied your moisturizer, smearing the cool gel across your cheeks. It was weird, seeing yourself like this. Stuck inside of a memory of a person, you didn’t even recognize yourself anymore.

It was late—three in the morning, the comedown of another argument you had with Steve, over something stupid he had done or said earlier, you couldn’t remember it at this point. Maybe it was something you had done or said at this point, possibly joking about him hanging out with his ‘other girlfriends’, something that used to make him laugh, but now had him on the defense.

As you finished up your night routine, his footsteps came down the hall, slowly creeping open to door with the push of his socked foot. His head peaked around the corner, his brown eyes widening as they caught sight of you.

“I thought you were gonna be in bed,” he said, making his way over to your bed. His shirt was off, exposing mole dotted skin, hair on his abdomen, trailing down into the waistline of his pants.

Three months ago and you would’ve jumped him in that moment, exhaustion the only thing on your mind lately.

“Couldn’t sleep.” Your voice was curt, short responses residual from the argument. Glancing at him in the mirror, you could see his eye roll.

He turned over, back to you as he flicked off the bedside light. It left you in darkness, your own eyes rolling in response as you had no choice but to go to bed next to him, awkwardly shuffling under the sheets.

He breathed deeply, body rising and falling with his breath, tucked away in his corner. You stared at his back in the darkness, sadness over your features as you adjusted to the dim room, only lit by the moon shining through parted blinds.

“Steve?”

Your voice was small as you said his name, waiting a few moments before he turned around to face you. You could see the reflection of the moonlight in his eyes, slightly glowing as he traced your face.

“What’s wrong, babe?”

Your heart ticked, the first time he had called you that in months. It was the bare minimum, the sheer uttering of the word reminding you of why you fell for him.

“What were you doing?” He was confused, brown crinkling asked he reached over to run a hand down the length of your side. His fingertips got caught at the hem of your night gown, slowly pushing the material up so it exposed more of your thigh.

“What are you talking about?” His fingertips ran circles on your skin, goosebumps prickling up underneath the touch.

“After we argued,” you said, breaking eye contact as you suddenly became nervous. “You disappeared. You always do around this time, when you think I’m asleep.”

His hand left your thigh, it drew into him like there was a strong magnet, like something had burned him. You could hear him thinking, gears turning as he thought of a lie to tell you.

He settled on the truth.

“I was, uh, just talking to Nancy,” he said, indifferent in his tone. You nodded, biting the inside of your lip.

“Nancy?”

He nodded, your eyes seeing it out of your peripheral as you were still not looking at him. Steve didn’t know what to say, choosing to wait for you before he dug himself in a hole.

“About what?”

“Just, uhm, things, I don’t know,” he ran a hand through his hair, turning so he laid on his back. Staring up at the ceiling, he tilted his head to the side, taking a deep breath before closing his eyes. “We’re friends, so…”

A wetness stung at the corners of your eyes as you closed them, wiping away a stubborn tear that fell down your face. “Yeah… friends.”

It had been two weeks since your breakup with Steve, 15 days to be exact. Two weeks of crying, shoving your face with anything you could see, watching shitty romance movies with Robin, and trying to distract yourself with anything you could—wine and Dirty Dancing were your latest endeavors.

Robin sat opposite of you, handing you a tissue as you began to sob at the film, Patrick Swayze having a close up. She side eyed you, biting back the smirk that sat on her lips.

“Babe, it’s not even a sad part,” she muttered, shaking her head as you tossed your head back on the couch, lips finding your drink, wrapped around a crazy straw found in your kitchen that led the drink into your mouth.

“It’s so sad because perfect men do exist,” you whined through sobs, squeezing your eyes shut. “And I just lost mine.”

Robin sighed, placing the tissue box aside as she leaned into you. Her hands wrapped around your waist as much as she could, her head pushed into your stomach.

“It’s okay, Steve’s a dummy anyways,” she said, you knew she was lying. He was still her best friend, even though she chose to comfort you during this breakup. It had been your decision anyways, deciding to take a break when things got too tough between you guys.

“Isn’t he?” You sighed, wiping your face as she straightened up, removing herself from you. You ran a hand over your forehead, feeling heat come off of your skin. “He’s going to so regret this.”

Robin gave a toothy grin, pride covering her face as you seemed to come to your senses. “There she is.”

You sat up from the couch, legs wobbling as the alcohol began to settle in. Your hands found your hips, triumph high in your shoulders. “He’s regretting this. I was the best damn thing to happen to him.”

“Damn straight,” your friend agreed, taking a sip from your wine.

“He’s going to realize that he needs me,” you said, stomping to emphasize your point. “Maybe he’s realized that now, it’s been a while you know.”

Her face fell as you continued speaking, her lips forming around silent words. “Okay, well maybe—“

“Maybe he’s giving me space,” you tapped a finger against your face, thinking. “I should call him!”

Robin’s jaw dropped, her brow furrowing the most it possibly could as she stood up off the couch. You were quick, running to the phone before she could stop you, your fingers dialing that memorized number. It rang as she stood across from you, eyes wide as she shook her head, mouthing the words ‘No, no, no,’ over and over.

You figured it was because you were a little too drunk for this, you were bound to say something you were going to regret.

“Harrington home!”

It wasn’t Steve. That high pitched voice that answered the phone. It wasn’t his mom or anyone who should be at the home at this hour. It was her. Nancy. The girl who had plagued your relationship despite never being apart of it, despite being friends with your boyfriend—your ex.

You didn’t realize the phone had clattered to the floor, you stumbling back to the living room or sinking to your knees in front of the coffee table, your elbows resting to cradle your head in between your hands. You didn’t notice Robin kneeling beside you, calling your name as she rubbed small circles at the small of your back.

“Babe,” she whispered, pulling you out of your trance with the nickname she called you.

You looked at her, watching as she came to focus, the room finally not spinning. It wasn’t even the alcohol that had you in this state, it was the reality you had been longing to desperately ignore hitting you in the face.

“Is he—“

You couldn’t get the words out, a wave of nausea hitting you as you thought of it. You thought of Steve and Nancy, them starting—or finishing?—the memories that you once had.

She nodded, avoiding eye contact as a sob escaped you. Your chest hurt, feeling hollow and empty as she confirmed your worst fear. Robin fully wrapped you into your arms, pulling you into her chest as your cries filled the room.

Her arms were warm, felt like somewhat of a home, but nothing like the oasis that Steve had been.

“It’s been two weeks,” you muttered, shaking your head as she rubbed your back, her fingertips ghosting along the skin. The old sweater you wore bunched up underneath her touch.

“I know,” her lips pressed to the top of your hair, comforting you as you experienced the worst heartbreak of your life. You weren’t used to this side of her, but forever grateful for who she had become.

“How long have they been together?”

She was silent for a moment, sucking her tongue against her teeth as she thought of what to tell you.

“I-I don’t think you want to know.”

That was all it took for you to fully break inside. The fact that Steve was everything you had believed he wasn’t. The gentleman imagine you had of him was gone, his desperation and love for Nancy never going away, despite the years you spent together as a couple. It took the sound of her breakup with Jonathan to get him to fold, to get him to start fighting so you had no excuse to end things.

He was terrible. He had betrayed you in everywhere possible.

You hated Steve Harrington. Hated everything about him because you didn’t know a single thing about him.

Masterlist. Inbox and requests are open! <3

a/n: I hate mean steve with no pay off. He’s a jerk here, but it was an amazing request that was sent in. Once again babe, Ty for your patience. I hope this sufficed.

#my writing #Steve Harrington x you #Steve Harrington x reader #angst #requests #ughhh #this pained me to write #but im ngl #this is my headcanon bc I can actually see Steve doing this for Nancy #he loves that girl

[disillusioneddanny]

The Bats and TTPD Songs

This is just me sharing what songs I think matches each of the bats and why :> i take no criticism /j

Bruce Wayne-- Cassandra

Hear me out okay, the lyrics:

So, they killed Cassandra first 'cause she feared the worst And tried to tell the town So they filled my cell with snakes, I regret to say Do you believe me now?

This whole song just reminds me of Bruce and his contingencies, like he's constantly prepared for any situation and he's had people who have gotten mad at him for it before.

Dick Grayson-- Who's Afraid of Little Old Me

God where do I even start? I want to write a whole fucking fic based off of this song and Dick Grayson.

So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street Crash the party like a record scratch as I scream "Who's afraid of little old me?" I was tame, I was gentle 'til the circus life made me mean "Don't you worry, folks, we took out all her teeth" Who's afraid of little old me? Well, you should be

In this case, he was bright eyed and innocent until his parents were killed in front of him. Then he became Robin, then Nightwing and this man went through fucking hell and he has survived.

Everyone sees Dick for his smiles and his kindness but this man should not be crossed by any means. He's fucking lethal and has gone through so much shit in his life and he's just not the same bright eyed, innocent kid he once was. And you should be scared of him.

Jason Todd--Robin

So technically this song is about Christopher Robin from winnie the pooh, but I think it also captures Jason really well.

You have no idea The time will arrive for the cruel and the mean You'll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline But now we'll curtail your curiosity In sweetness Way to go, Tiger Higher and higher Wilder and lighter For you

I feel like this song focuses a lot on loss of innocence and growing up tbh, like the person this song is aimed at has no idea how hard the world is, how painful things can be but that they'll learn to handle it and bounce back. IDK the first time I heard it, it reminded me of how Jason believed that Robin is magic and maybe even like Bruce or Dick singing this to him knowing what was going to happen to him one day.

Tim Drake -- Clara Bow

okay, so there's not just one lyric that really sticks out to me but the overarching story that this song tells. It's all about being replaced with the next big thing. Taylor Swift is compared to Stevie Nicks who is compared to Clara Bow and one day T. Swift is going to be replaced with something shiny and new and that just reminds me of Tim.

Tim is the third Robin, he replaced Jason who replaced Dick and one day he himself is going to be replaced. There's a lot of HC where he's aware of this fact, that he knows that his role as Robin is not a permanent thing, that one day, he too will be replaced. And eventually, he is.

"You look like Taylor Swift In this light We're loving it. You've got edge she never did The future's bright ... Dazzling."

Cassandra Wayne -- The Albatross

okay Cass was really hard for me at first to pin down what song fit her but then I listened to The Albatross and holy cow.

The devil that you know Looks now more like an angel I'm the life you chose And all this terrible danger So cross your thoughtless heart She's the albatross She is here to destroy you

I don't know quite how to explain how this song makes me think of Cass except for how it just makes me think about how she decided to take her life in her own hands and become her own person. She was pretty much created with one thing in mind and that was all that was expected of her but she's become so much more than that. Now she's strong and powerful but in more ways than just how David Cain made her out to be. She's caring and loving and she's going to destroy the idea that she was ever just a weapon.

Stephanie Brown -- I Can Do It With a Broken Heart

Listen, listen, this woman has been through so freaking much and she has come out on top and with a smile on her face the entire time. She is resilient and she isn't scared to fight Bruce Wayne himself if she needs to.

'Cause I'm a real tough kid, I can handle my shit They said, "Babe, you gotta fake it 'til you make it" and I did

I know this song is about dealing with a break up but when I hear it, i think of everything that Steph has been through. Her dad who's a rogue, her mom who is struggling with addiction, getting pregnant and giving her baby up for adoption, not being considered good enough to be Robin, the list goes on and on and yet she does it. She rolls with the punches and she swallows it down and she smiles through it all and I just friggen love Stephanie Brown so much.

Duke Thomas -- Florida!!!

Admittedly, I don't know as much about Duke as the others (I'm so sorry, I just haven't gotten there in the comics quite yet, I'm just now getting to the aftermath of the Red Robin run and I haven't read New 52 yet. so this is purely based off of WFA )

Little did you know your home's really only The town you'll get arrested So you pack your life away just to wait out The shitstorm back in Texas

This song just makes me think about Duke because from what I've learned, kid's been through a lot and he's had to move in with the Waynes after what happened to his parents. I think of Florida as a song of starting over, picking up your broken pieces and finding yourself once again and that just feels like Duke.

He's been hurt and he's now having to figure out what to do and where to run. Now he's with the Waynes and he's slowly finding his place with their insanity.

Damian Wayne-- thanK you aIMee

Okay but imagine this song is Damian at Ra's al Ghul okay? Stick with me buddy.

I built a legacy that you can't undo But when I count the scars, there's a moment of truth That there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you

And maybe you've reframed it And in your mind, you never beat my spirit black and blue I don't think you've changed much

Damian has grown so much since the days he was still with the LOA and he recognizes that not only has he grown but he's done it DESPITE what Ra's did to him and that maybe a part of him is created by Ra's and he has learned to love that part of himself and he recognizes he wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for Ra's and his mother being conniving and evil. He's created a name for himself as Robin that goes against so much of what Ra's brainwashed him to believe.

Barbara Gordon-- The Bolter

And I can confirm she made A curious child, ever reviled By everyone except her own father With a quite bewitching face Splendidly selfish, charmingly helpless Excellent fun till you get to know her Then she runs like it's a race

This song just gives the brave, strong, independent vibes of Babs. Someone who lives her life to the fullest and embraces who she is. She's just powerful and she knows that she's amazing and she doesn't expect anything less from herself. She has gone through hell and she's come out of it stronger. She rolls with the punches, she doesn't let it stop her from her dreams, her desires.

Alfred Pennyworth-- I Hate it Here

I hate it here so I will go to Secret gardens in my mind People need a key to get to The only one is mine

This song just makes me think of Alfred when Jason died. That time where it's just him and Bruce and he's struggling to take care of his ward and he's also going through his own grief and unable to heal. I think Alfred has his own methods for taking care of himself, I think he's like the world's greatest compartmentalizer.

oh my god that got so freaking long lol. I'm so sorry. Anyway, y'all can listen to these specific songs here

#batman #taylor swift #TTPD #Bruce Wayne #Dick Grayson #Jason Todd #Tim Drake #Cassandra Cain #stephanie brown #alfred pennyworth #Damian Wayne #duke thomas #Barbara Gordon

[smolwritingchick]

The Bangtan Gal Chapter 93- Our First Time

Summary: Jennie celebrates her birthday in Japan and Jungkook makes it a memorable one.

Genre: Jungkook fluff! And smut! (A for effort on the smut! I'm sorry if you're a bit disappointed with the smut writing but I'll continue to get better. Practice makes perfect!)

Words: 15,000+ 

Author's Note: It's been a while! I missed writing this story, I'm happy to be back at it. I missed you all dearly! I have been overthinking the HECK out of this chapter. Like ideas kept coming but then I was worried cause it was like ah...is this too much or not that realistic? I had a vision but I kept going back and forth regarding realism and contemplated deleting stuff but then I wanted to keep it. So, I hope you enjoy this and it was worth the wait. I wanted to make it romantic, fluffy, intimate, and a bit vulnerable in a way. I mean this is a critical point in their relationship and I didn't want to screw it up.

I just feel like these two will be comfortable with each other and certain about their love. Everyone especially black women should be loved on and cherished by their significant other and I thought a lot about how Jungkook would feel in this moment with Jennie in the story after pinning for her for so long. 

I'd say Summer Walker's Nobody Else and Best Part by Daniel Caesar & H.E.R is super relatable to JenKook. Loveeee these song so much. Both are so beautiful and always get me in my feelings.

Also: context on Booker T and his Spinaroonie which will be mentioned in the story. Black wrestlers mean a lot to me and he has been a huge part of my childhood.

Soon after chilling for a bit, and celebrating my birthday on May 10th, I will be working on my wrestling story next to update that and then I will be back writing the next chapters for Bangtan Gal. There will be two chapters updated for this one, the Muster chapter which will have Jin and Jennie's wrestling match, and then the next story chapter :)

So, bear with me for the slow updates. It may take a bit but I will try my best to not take forever. Again, thanks for sticking with me and I hope this was ok. Lemme know what you think! Until next time!!

Currently me after uploading:

--------

A loud sigh escaped Jennie's lips as she sat down in the middle of a wrestling ring. Here she was alone at Big Hit, in one of their rooms which had a standard sized wrestling ring for her and Jin to practice for their next match. Lately, it had been used as a private room for Bangtan's Oldest and Youngest members and held a lot of gym equipment as well. 

For a while now, Big Hit proposed for Jennie and Jin to get professional wrestling lessons. Jin stuck with learning the basics but Jennie wanted to learn more and asked for extra lessons as wrestling had started to become a new hobby for her. Despite the soreness and occasional bruising she'd endure while training, wrestling was fun and stress relieving. Their professional lessons were a few days a week as they learned the basics and prepared for their choreographed match to make sure things went well. Juggling dance practice, recording music, events, and wrestling lessons took a while to adjust but the two members remained dedicated and wanted to put on a great video for ARMY when it was time to record their match.

Big Hit wanted to ensure their safety as well and thought professional wrestling lessons would help. Because at the end of the day, Jin and Jennie were still idols and the last thing the company needed was two of their artists injured off of wrestling. And Jennie knows from watching WWE that those wrestling injuries are no joke. She was grateful every day for not suffering a serious injury and hoped to keep it that way. 

Since her hair was dyed red, Jennie wanted to portray WWE's Lita for their next match while Jin was still researching which wrestler to portray. Since the matches are predetermined, Big Hit wanted Jin to win which made sense to Jennie and she was all for it. For the past week, Jin and Jennie would go over what they wanted to do for the match and their trainers were extremely helpful in making their vision come to life while assisting in producing the match.

With it being evening time and everyone had left for the day, Jennie stayed behind to practice while wearing some shorts, knee pads, and a tank top. She wanted to get a few moves down and hoped to perform them better as she kept jumping off the top rope safely onto a padded mat to pretend it was her opponent.

After drinking water, she stood on her feet and stretched.

"There you are!" Jungkook's bright voice filled her ears as she turned around and smiled.

"Hey! Sorry, Jungkook, I should have texted you. I wasn't ready to go, yet. I wanted to train a little bit more,"

"It's all good, honey. What are you working on?" he strolled over to the ring and went in, wearing a hoodie with the hood over his head and sweatpants.

"My moonsault. You know the move where you backflip off the top rope and onto your opponent lying on the mat?"

"Yeah! I know the move," he reached out for her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm sweaty," she giggled and tried to pull away but he wouldn't budge.

"I don't care," 

He smiled and leaned down to give her multiple kisses on her lips which she immediately returned, smiling into the kisses. 

"Show me what you got with the moonsault. I can help you," he said while she looked at him in surprise as they pulled away.

Jungkook even learned a bit of wrestling just in case he wanted to participate in future matches. He was still trying to convince the rest of the members to join but so far no luck. But hopefully one day.

"A-are you sure? I should practice more on the big mat first," she said with a hint of nervousness.

"I'm the Golden Maknae, I got this," he flashed a big grin. "Where do you want me, Jagi?"

"O-okay. Um, let me move the mat and you can take its place," she pulled the mat to the other side of the ring while Jungkook got on his back.

"All set! Let me know when you're ready, Jennie,"

Nervousness continued to overwhelm her as she replied, "Kookie, are you sure this is a good idea? I don't think I'm ready to perform it on someone just yet,"

"You never know unless you try! Come at me. Let me see what you got,"

"Fine, fine. Stay still," she got up the top rope, trying to remember everything she could for the move. "Three...two...one...go!"

She backflipped off the top rope gracefully and landed right on him. However, a loud groan escaped his lips as her knees landed on his stomach instead of her torso, which made her freak out.

"Ah! Oh my God! Are you okay!? Why am I such a klutz!?" she got off of him to see him clenching his stomach with his face twisted in discomfort. 

Oh, this was so bad. She knew she shouldn't have decided to practice on him. All that training went out the window as she saw her man in pain. 

She cupped his face while he continued to clench his stomach. "Kookie, I'm sorry! Are you okay!?"

"Yeah..." he grunted, '"We'll work on it,"

"I am SO sorry!" she exclaimed after releasing him. "I did so much better, earlier! I promise, I did! I just miscalculated! I can do it, better! But I'm not quite ready to do the move on someone! Ah...why did I agree to this!? My knees were on your stomach! God, I know that had to hurt. And I got my knee pads on, too? Sheesh!"

As he watched her ramble, Jungkook couldn't help but laugh and stopped clenching his stomach, sitting up.

"You're cute when you freak out like this," he giggled.

"You're not hurt!?" she exclaimed.

"I am a little. My stomach hurts but I was exaggerating the pain. It doesn't hurt that bad," 

"I-you idiot! Don't do that!" she smacked his arm, making him laugh again. "You had me thinking I injured you! I was about to freak out and cry to Bang PD!"

"Wow, you were going to do that? I should have kept up the act,"

"Shut up!" she giggled as they both stood up. "You're a piece of work, you know that?"

"So, I've been told," he smiled and placed a warm hand on her cheek, brushing his thumb against it. "You did good, babe. You just gotta work more on the delivery of your moonsault. I say Jin stands no chance against you in the high flying department,"

"Thank you. I'll keep practicing on the mat, for now," she kissed his cheek and placed the mat where it was before.

"How are you and hyung coming along with the match?" he asked as he stood across in a corner, leaning against the top turnbuckle with his arms crossed.

"It's going so well! Jin still gotta figure out who he wants to be. I gave him some suggestions, so he's researching to get one of their personas down. And once he does choose the wrestler, then the trainers can try to teach him some of their moves to add to the match. I lowkey want him to be Booker T from WWE. I told him earlier as a suggestion and he said he'll think about it. But yo, if he chooses him that would make my day. To watch Jin do the spin-a-roonie though...that will have me crying," she laughed at the idea with Jungkook.

"Can you dig it, SUCKA~!" Jungkook said Booker T's wrestling catchphrase in English with Jennie as the two laughed again.

"Yeah, hyung would be so extra with his persona. I can't wait to see who he decides to be. And I'm looking forward to being front row to watch it this time instead of on video,"

"Haha, you're in for a treat. Man, all this makes me want to go to a WWE event one of these days. If we're back in America and they're doing a show close to where we are, I want to go!"

"I hope so too, so you can go. I'll come with you,"

"It's a date!"

"Speaking of dates, we still need to go to a rock concert together like you wanted,"

"Yeah! I gotta research that too whenever we are free. I have no idea who will be on tour but no matter what we have to do GA! And we must crowd surf! It's gonna be fun, I promise!"

The lovers could see the date now. She was on top of his shoulders, singing the lyrics to whatever song was playing from one of her favorite bands while he vibed and smiled at her having the time of her life. It needed to happen soon. 

As she continued to practice her wrestling, Jungkook's eyes began to roam down her body, as he pondered about his self control. Her dark skin glistened in the lighting of the room from the sweat of her workout and her hair was in a messy bun. Every day the want for her increased and her birthday couldn't come fast enough with the way his body reacted to her. He wondered if she felt the same.

As her birthday drew near, Jungkook's anticipation and nervousness kicked in tenfold. It was a huge step and he hoped everything would go well and he could make her feel how wanted and loved she is. 

"Did you hear me?"

"Do what?" Jungkook snapped out of his trance and looked into her eyes.

"I asked, since you're here do you want to train with me, too?" she repeated.

"Yeah, why not. I could use a workout before we go back," he took off his hoodie to show his tank top, revealing his muscular arms as her eyes eagerly checked them out.

Now this was a little dangerous. Jennie was already trying to keep herself in check to not let her dirty thoughts get to her. Shaking the thoughts away, the two trained back and forth, practicing moves. She was grateful for it and it was nice to have a partner to assist. But as time went on, she began losing focus because, in the back of her mind, her desire to be intimate with her man had gotten stronger, these days. But maybe...just maybe...

Jungkook currently had his arms around her from behind in a waist lock while she struggled to get out of it. With him breathing down her neck and his firm arms holding her, she seemed to have completely lost focus. 

Abruptly, she pushed back against him to grind, making him sharply inhale.

"You know that should be a disqualification," he said in her ear as his hands began to roam down her body.

"Hm, well, there is no referee in sight. So, what now?" she turned in his arms. 

Before he could reply, she pulled him by his shirt to smooch him as he groaned softly against her mouth. Their kissing became needy and his hands traveled down to her ass, squeezing it. She gasped at the sudden action which led him to slide his tongue into her mouth and lift her up as she wrapped her legs around him. As he proceeded to walk forward to press her up against a corner, Jennie cupped his face and held onto him.

She wanted him so badly. She was ready and felt herself getting aroused that she didn't even care where it was as long as it was with him. With Jungkook, as much as he wanted to touch her and lose control, he didn't want it to be abrupt like this. With every last restraint, he set her down and reluctantly pulled away, running a hand through his messy hair.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked, catching her breath from their passionate kissing.

"No, of course not. I want this and I want you. Believe me when I say I've been wanting to touch you and make you feel amazing for a long time, now. But you deserve a bed, Jennie,"

Her heart fluttered at how serious he sounded about that.

He stepped forward and placed his hands on the top rope, connected to the top turnbuckle, trapping her in the corner. "And I want to take my time and kiss every inch of you...and I want to hear you say my name again when I make you feel things no one else can because you're mine...but not now. Not here. It'll be on a bed. And soon. I promise,"

"You say that and expect me not to pounce on you? You're giving me images that I want to become a reality, now,"

"You do the same to me,"

"And I was only going to ask for you to come to my studio. I mean...there is a couch,"

He chuckled at the suggestive thought. "And a bed for your first is even more inviting,"

"Touché,"

"Wait a little longer for it, okay?"

She smiled and nodded. "Okay. I know it'll be worth the wait,"

He returned her smile and leaned back in to kiss her passionately, not ready to let her go just yet. However, their making out was cut short when they failed to realize the door opening. A loud clearing of someone's throat was heard, making the couple quickly back away and turn to who was there.

Of all people...it was Bang PD. 

'This would be my luck...' Jennie thought to herself as she bowed with Jungkook apologetically. 

She was mortified while Jungkook blushed out of embarrassment. 

Jennie thought everyone left but then she realized she had forgotten Bang PD had told her he would also stay late to finish up some work. He must have come by to say goodbye to her since he was done.

"Jennie..." Bang PD let out a sigh, shaking his head as he looked at the couple.

These kids...boy was he amused at the scene. 

"Y-yes, sir?" she answered, flustered.

"When you told me you would be staying late to practice, I didn't mean making out in the ring with Jungkook. You two should be working," he replied with his arms crossed.

He scolded them for not focusing on training and then laughed about it in the end, wishing them a good night and to next time focus on work. After he left, Jennie and Jungkook glanced at each other and ended up laughing at the embarrassment.

"Oh my God...I can't believe that just happened," she got out of the ring with him. "We are NEVER telling the boys about this. This is going to the grave,"

"I second that. Do you think he's going to mention this to anyone?" he feared.

"Oh, fuck outta here, I hope not!"

----------

"I cannot believe this..." Jennie grumbled with her arms crossed as she sat in the van with the members, on their way to the airport.

She had her fair share of goofy moments but this right here was currently number one. The boys were struggling not to laugh as they snuck glances at her wearing a large Pikachu Onesie. The reason? Losing a bet with Jungkook on who could beat who in Smash Bros, last night. She tried her hardest but he prevailed in a best out of 5.

"You look adorable," Jungkook giggled.

"Be quiet," she snapped at him in a playful tone, earning another giggle from him. "I can't believe I have to walk out in public with this on. Why? You know Dispatch is going to be there taking photos."

"You did bring it on yourself. You should have beat him in the game," Yoongi chuckled.

"Wow." she shook her head. "I am loving the support, right now,"

Bangtan had some fan events in Japan just before their 3rd Muster in Seoul and were headed to the airport to get on their flight. Once they arrived at the airport, fans and reporters were already there to take videos and photos. Jennie watched as the members and staff made their way out of the vehicle as she tried to mentally prepare herself to be seen with the onesie.

About to get out of the car, Jin turned back to her and chuckled. "Are you coming?"

Seated next to him by the window, she groaned. "Yes..."

With a smile, Jin helped her out of the car and surprised sounds from the crowd were heard when they saw her in the onesie, along with giggling and various comments on how cute she looked. Being a good sport, Jennie grinned and waved at the cameras, walking inside the airport with everyone else.

She laughed, forgetting about the embarrassment, and began to pose, with the members. Miss Bangtan even started playing the part of Pikachu, while reporters ate it up. After photos, the group started going to the destination of where their flight was as the large group of fans and reporters followed them.

"Jennie-ah, why are you wearing a Pikachu onesie?" she heard a fan ask who was recording her with their phone.

"I lost a video game bet against Jungkook," she grinned sheepishly, earning giggles in response.

Safe to say, her look went viral and became an instant classic BTS moment for ARMY as they tweeted their thoughts:

'Look at Jen-kachu!'

'The fact that she agreed to this lmfaooo.'

'Jungkook was the cause of this!? LOL the Golden Duo never has a dull moment!'

'Wait I thought this was photoshopped! WHAT!?'

'Jennie blessing us with her cuteness!'

'I deadass thought it was a joke but Jennie is actually at the airport as Pikachu!'

'Hahahaha not Jennie getting caught in the mix of losing bets!'

'I LOVE cute Jennie! This made my day!'

--------

Because of her birthday, the staff treated Jennie to have her own suite in the hotel BTS stayed while the rest of the members roomed with each other. The room was huge as it even held a kitchen, which Jungkook was currently using to his advantage while Jennie was out eating with the Hyung Line for her birthday. Jungkook's birthday plans for Jennie were in motion as he and the rest of the Maknae Line decorated her suite with balloons and other birthday accessories. 

"She is going to freak!" Jimin beamed.

"Yeah, this looks like it's going to be her best birthday, yet! You gotta tell us her reaction when she sees the room," Taehyung added.

Jungkook grinned as he decorated. "I will! You two okay continuing to decorate? I want to start the cake,"

"Yeah, go ahead! I still can't believe you're going to bake for her. This is adorable," Jimin giggled.

Jungkook wanted to go all out for her birthday and thought of baking for her. She always baked for him and the rest of the boys. It would be sweet to have her receive a cake that was made from the heart. The Golden Maknae researched some good birthday cake recipes and chose to bake a small red velvet cake for her. 

He whipped out all the ingredients he purchased the night before and placed them all on the counter to begin while the oven was preheating. Getting right to work, Jungkook was diligent in making sure he followed the directions and mixed the ingredients while checking to see if the measurements were fine.

"Do you know what you're doing?" Taehyung teased while walking over to him, trying to throw him off as he mixed everything in the bowl.

"Go away!" Jungkook playfully shouted at him, turning away.

"You sure you don't need help?" Jimin added to the teasing.

"No!" Jungkook exclaimed. "You two just continue decorating and stop messing with me,"

However, Jimin and Taehyung decided to continue messing with him by playfully hitting him and throwing some decorations his way, which resulted in Jungkook setting the nicely mixed bowl down and running around the suite to chase them. It didn't take too long for him to beat them up before going back to working on the cake. Once in the oven, Jungkook put a timer on his phone and continued to decorate with the guys.

"What do you plan to do with Ennie when she returns?" Taehyung asked.

The question caused Jungkook to smile to himself as his heart leaped. To spend the day with the girl he had fallen for and was proud to call his girlfriend was something he'll cherish forever. He wanted everything to be perfect because she deserved the world. For her birthday, Jungkook convinced his hyungs to let him and Jennie have the entire day together. He was happy they all agreed and that he'd have some sweet alone time with her. He thought long and hard about how he wanted to spend the day and hoped she loved what he had planned.

"I have it all planned out but don't want to jinx myself and give it away. I just hope to make it as special as possible," Jungkook answered with joy. 

"No matter what you do, she'll love it. I mean it's Ennie. She appreciates everything we do for her,"

"And we're happy to see you be the best boyfriend for her. Our ship is still sailing strong, isn't it Tae?" Jimin praised.

"Indeed!" Taehyung high fived him with enthusiasm.

Jungkook chuckled and blushed at the kind words. "I sometimes still can't believe she's mine. I'm really happy I told her my feelings, that day,"

"Us too, Jungkookie," Jimin patted his back. 

After Jimin and Taehyung left, Jungkook went to where the bedroom was to start decorating it. She had told him she was ready and he hoped that tonight would be special for the both of them for that first time. To take that next step in the relationship. 

Later, his phone began to buzz and he took it out of his pocket to see a text from Jin.

Jin: We're back at the hotel! Meet us in the lobby.

JK: On my way!

--------

To Jennie, she was with the rest of Bangtan and patiently waited for Jungkook. Her tummy was full from the delicious breakfast and she had a big smile on her face. Her birthday had been filled with great vibes so far and she couldn't wait to see what else was planned today. 

"Jennie~!" Jimin ran up to her with Taehyung to embrace her. "Happy birthday!"

She giggled and returned the hug enthusiastically. "Thank you~! I feel so loved! First, it was the breakfast, and now the hugs from you and Taehyung!"

"I'm glad you're enjoying your day so far. It's only going to get better,"

"Ooh? More surprises? I wonder what's next. That breakfast hit the spot. Japan has some amazing food,"

As they all chatted, Jungkook finally came down on the elevator to see Jennie chatting with the guys. Sensing his presence, she turned and grinned. 

"Kookie!" she waved as he strolled over to her.

"Happy birthday!" he grinned and embraced her tightly, spinning her around as he lifted her in his arms.

"Thank you!"

"We'll leave you two, to it," Namjoon smiled and began walking to the elevator.

"Yes and please just stay safe. And no, I will not blow up your phones to get updates. I promise," Jin chuckled and waved, following Namjoon.

"Have fun, today! We'll see you, eventually," Jimin giggled and left with the rest of the members.

"Oh? They're all leaving? Even Jin? What a surprise," she said in wonder. "So, it's just us?"

"Yeah, you're with me for the rest of the day," Jungkook proudly said.

"What?! Oh, that's perfect! How'd you get them to agree? Especially Jin?"

"I am the Golden Maknae," he grinned.

"You always say that shit, give me the details! I want a proper answer," she playfully hit him.

"Haha, I told them I'd treat them to Korean beef when we return to Seoul. So, they were fine with that. They eagerly agreed once I mentioned food,"

"I like that. So, where to?"

"You'll see. Let's go,"

As they were en route to their destination, Jennie continued to scroll on Twitter to see the sweet messages from fans for her birthday. And then she smiled when ARMY began to notice that Nike and a Nike PR followed her Instagram. She was excited to announce her being sponsored by Nike and was just waiting for the OK.

As soon as they made it to the destination, Jennie looked around in awe.

They were at Universal!

"Universal Japan!? Oh, hell yes! We about to have a TIME, today!" she cheered and put a black mask on with him as Jungkook laughed at her enthusiasm, agreeing.

After they checked in, they walked inside the park while Jennie looked around, amazed. She always wanted to check out amusement parks in other countries. She can check this off her bucket list.

"Follow me," he said as she walked closely with him.

"Oh, wait! I wanna take a photo with Hello Kitty!" she pointed out the mascot taking photos with the children.

Jen waited patiently for her turn, smiling under her mask at the adorable kids. Then, she kept her mask on and posed with the peace sign while Jungkook snapped the photo. She'll be sure to tweet it on Twitter, later.

Walking inside one of the stores, the large variety of headbands caught her attention.

"Soooo many options! Look at all these headbands," she looked through them.

After looking around, the two decided to get matching headbands. Once they put them on, they took cute selfies together and even some silly ones. As they walked further into the park at Universal Japan, Jennie began to hear the Harry Potter theme song, taking her by surprise.

"Wait a damn minute...are we-are we going to Harry Potter World!?" she exclaimed. Once she turned to Jungkook and saw him nod happily, she jumped and squealed excitedly. "What!? Oh my gosh! Wait, you took the test!?"

"I did. I'm a Ravenclaw,"

"Ahhhh! It suits you! So much to do! Okay! We gotta get wands! We gotta do the whole thing. We gotta go on the rides, we gotta get butterbeer, get the outfits, everything! You ready?" she giggled excitedly as he smiled, thinking it was the cutest thing.

"Lead the way,"

"That's what I'm talking about!" she grabbed his hand as they wandered around.

Jungkook had brought a camera with him and had been filming her since their arrival. Smiling as he filmed, he observed as she looked around the area, geeking out. This was so going towards a future GCF for their relationship reveal.

"Ah~! It's just like the movies! I feel like I'm actually in the movies!" she beamed.

After picking up their wands and robes, they check out Three Broomsticks to eat lunch.

"Here we go! Butterbeer! Let's see..." Jennie checked out the options they had.

"Should we get cold or hot butterbeer?" Jungkook pondered.

"Let's get both and try it together,"

After ordering food and two cold and two hot butterbeer beverages, the couple sat together and ate while discussing how much fun they were having so far.

"Okay, the moment of truth. You filming?" she grinned as she watched him with his camera.

"Yes, milady," 

"Okay! Let's see if butterbeer tastes as good as everyone says! I'm going to try the cold one first," she presented the cup and began to take a big sip.

"And the results are...?" he asked with anticipation.

"This SLAPS!" she praised and took another sip, enjoying the delicious taste and cream on top.

After watching her praising the cold drink, Jungkook filmed himself trying the drink and nodded in approval, enjoying it as well. Turning the camera back to her to film, she presented the hot butterbeer next. 

"Okay! Now for the hot one!" she announced and began to take a careful sip. "Oh, I like this, too. Very rich taste. And I feel all warm and cozy. It's warming me up nicely,"

Jungkook filmed himself trying the hot one and enjoyed the taste as well but not as much as the cold one.

"It's good. But I like the cold one, more," he said, still enjoying the hot drink as he took more sips.

"It's hard to choose. I like the hot version just a little bit more. Both are amazing. Well, butterbeer is worth the hype. I'm glad we finally tried it!"

The rest of the day was spent all over Harry Potter world, enjoying the rides and shopping in the stores. They even got to check out some other areas of Universal while taking lots of photos. After a fun filled day, the couple began to leave the park and Jungkook gave her his jacket to wear so she wouldn't be too cold.

"Enjoyed yourself?" He asked.

Enjoying the warmth of his jacket while holding his hand, she said, "One of the best birthdays ever! We gotta go back again, soon. Thanks for today. I had an amazing time,"

"I'm glad you did. Now, onto your next surprise," 

"Wait, there's more?"

-------

Making it back to the hotel, Jungkook guided Jennie back to her room, having her close her eyes as she walked in.

"And...open," he smiled after closing the door behind him.

Once she opened her eyes, she looked around in shock.

"No way!" she grinned and walked around. 

A large happy birthday banner was on display, tons of gifts were placed in the living room area and even cute balloons and decorations were scattered all around the room.

"Jungkook...this is incredible!"

"You deserve it," he grinned. "Jimin and Taehyung helped out,"

"They're the best. You're the best. Everyone is the best. This is too sweet, what?" 

"I'm glad you like everything. And...these are for you," he presented her with a vase full of a dozen red roses and she placed a hand over her chest, appreciative of the gesture.

"Aw...thank you!" she gave him a big kiss and set the vase down on the dining room table. "Wow...these are gorgeous! And they smell great!"

"Nike sent you something as well," he pointed to the living room couch as he made his way over.

"What!? A whole custom birthday box from Nike? What!? Oh, I am about to lose my mind!" she shouted happily and ran over to the large Orange box, sitting on the couch with him.

It held a card wishing her a happy birthday and that they were excited about her working with them. When she opened the box, there were tons of Nike goods in her size and custom made items just for her which made her heart soar.

"Wow...I sound like a broken record but...I...I feel so loved. And I'm so grateful to have you and everyone else in my life. Like really...thank you for always showing me how special I am," she said and kissed him again.

"Always. You mean a lot to me and you deserve all of this and more,"

"Kook...you mean a lot to me, too," 

After the two checked out everything from the Nike box, Jungkook spoke, "I made something for you,"

"Oh? What is it?" she looked on in anticipation.

"Close your eyes, first,"

"Okay," she closed her eyes with a smile, awaiting the surprise.

Getting up from the couch, Jungkook made his way to the fridge to grab the small red velvet cake that he had made for her. Despite the constant teasing from Jimin and Taehyung on whether he knew what he was doing, the cake turned out quite well and was decorated nicely with the icing. After grabbing a few paper plates, plastic forks, and a plastic knife, Jungkook set everything down on the coffee table in front of the couch as Jennie continued to wait patiently.

He placed a 1 candle and a 9 candle on the cutely decorated cake and presented it to her with a smile.

"Open," he softly said.

Opening her eyes, she looked at the cake in surprise, covering her mouth. She glanced up at him, back at the cake, and then back at him, uncovering her mouth to reveal a grin.

"What? You baked for me?"

"You bake for everyone. I wanted this birthday to be memorable so I decided to try to make you something,"

"Jungkook, today has been way more than memorable. This is so sweet, thank you. It smells so good. And it looks good, too,"

"I hope you like it. But before digging in..." he lit the candles and then began to sing Happy Birthday angelically which made her heart leap.

"Make a wish," he happily said. 

After a moment of thinking of a wish, she blew out the candles and they both cheered.

"Let's try the cake together," she requested.

Once Jungkook cut a big slice and put it on a paper plate to share, he placed it on the table. The two picked up a forkful and decided to feed each other. Jennie expected Jungkook's cake to taste delicious and she was correct, enjoying every bite as they continued to feed each other.

"How do you like it? I think it's pretty good," he said.

"You've outdone yourself, this tastes great!" she complimented.

"Better than you?" he teased in a hopeful voice.

"Alright now," she deadpanned before breaking out into giggles with him. 

After finishing the slice, Jungkook put the rest of the cake in the fridge.

"Ah, I'm so spoiled. Today has been magical! Like, look at this! I don't even know where to continue for the gifts," she said, looking at all the gifts scattered around from friends and family.

"Do you want to open your gifts now or see your last gift of the evening?"

"Last gift?" she looked at him curiously.

He smiled softly and nodded. 

The curiosity took over her. "Show me the last gift,"

"Follow me," he grabbed her hand and led her to the bedroom door.

Once he opened it, they walked in and saw that the room was decorated romantically. Cute electric candles lit up the dark room along with rose petals scattered around the floor and bed.

She gasped lightly as her heart fluttered. "Jungkook..."

After closing the door, he watched as she stood in front of him, looking around in awe. Slowly walking over to her from behind, he saw her turn around. No words needed to be said at the moment as they smiled at each other. They both knew they wanted this and felt secure in their feelings.

He gazed at her lovingly as he reached out to pull her into his arms, leaning down to capture her lips tenderly. She held onto him as they kissed and their stomachs leaped with joy and anticipation of what was about to happen. Pulling away she smiled and grabbed his hands, walking back until she was closer to the bed. Turning him around, she made him sit on the edge of the bed as the butterflies increased in her stomach. Straddling him, she wrapped her arms around his neck while feeling his hands rest on her hips.

'Wow...we're really about to do this,' she thought as she held his gaze.

"Nervous?" he asked softly.

"A little," she admitted.

"I'm nervous too but whatever we do it'll feel right," he responded while she ran a hand through his soft hair and cupped his cheek. "We have all night and I plan to take advantage of it. We'll go slow, okay?" 

"Okay," she smiled and explored his mouth again, tasting the red velvet cake from his lips.

Once she pulled away, he guided her soft hands to his firm chest and she slowly began to undo the buttons of his dress shirt. Unbuttoning the last button, she took it off him eagerly and got a good look at his toned torso, admiring the view which did not go unnoticed by him. She kissed him again, having her hands all over his body as the warmth of his skin radiated onto her. Jungkook smiled into the kiss, loving how her hands roamed, making him feel satisfied with his body. He had been getting slightly bigger in muscle and had been working out even more these days. 

She didn't know how much time had passed as she kept touching and kissing him but she loved how patient he was. He didn't rush her. He let her set the pace and let her do whatever she wanted.

As her soft, full lips trailed down to his chin and his neck, she began to slowly grind into him, making him groan softly which caused her stomach to leap at the pleasant sound. The grip on her hips tightened as he moved with her to create more friction. He sighed out her name when she nipped softly on his neck. Trailing kisses up his neck and capturing his lips again, she could feel him through his jeans as he pushed his hips into hers again, making her moan softly.

She felt his warm hands on her waist as he met her eyes, asking if it was OK to continue. Once she nodded, she felt her sweatshirt ride up and helped him take it off, tossing it on the floor. Jungkook swallowed hard, looking at her chest with desire as it was covered in a red bra.

"You can touch me, you know," she reminded with a smile and grabbed his hands, guiding them to her chest.

"I-I know...just...wow..." he said breathlessly.

He was in a trance and felt himself getting harder, enjoying the view up close like this. She sighed into his touch when he squeezed lightly and had his lips travel around her neck.

"You are so beautiful..." he murmured against her skin while his hands caressed her, making her squirm and whimper softly.

He was pleased to hear the sounds coming from her as she moved her neck to give him better access, feeling his sweet kisses all over. Suddenly, he easily stood up with her legs wrapped around his waist. Spinning around a little, she giggled, making him smile and capture her lips as she cupped his cheeks. Not breaking the kiss, he gently laid her down on the bed, crawling on top of her as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

Everything he was doing to her so far made her body feel warm all over as her heart pounded. The way he kissed her and continued to caress her body had her intoxicated by his touch. As they both sat up a little, Jungkook glanced at her to see if she was ready to continue and she nodded. Reaching out to the back of her bra, he attempted to unclasp it but began to struggle. The sight made Jen look amused as she thought it was cute how concentrated yet confused he was at trying to do such a simple task.

"Need help?" she teased.

"I got this," he said but continued to struggle.

As she watched him fumble with the bra, a giggle escaped her lips, making his ears twitch and glance back up at her.

"Are you laughing at me?" he chuckled.

"A little~. Here, let me help," she helped him unclasp it and take it off as she tossed it somewhere on the floor.

"Wow..." he breathed, drinking her in.

He gently laid her down and grabbed her right breast in his palm. Feeling him place kisses over her chest, she let out soft moans and writhed under his touch while he gave her left breast attention. While he sucked and swirled his tongue around her hard left nipple, her back arched as a wave of heat surged down between her legs. This felt too good as she continued to let out sounds of pleasure, enjoying what his mouth was doing. As he brushed her right nipple with his thumb, he continued to suck and nip on her left one, before moving over to give her right breast the same attention.

"Can I?" he breathed as his hands moved down to the button of her jeans.

"Yes," she breathed with want.

Unbuttoning her jeans and zipping down the fly, he helped her out of them, along with her red underwear, and tossed them off the bed. Moving back up, he kissed her again passionately. She then began to whimper against his mouth and squirmed when she felt one of his hands traveling down to her thigh. 

"Still sensitive here, I see," he murmured, pleased to have remembered one of her sensitive spots.

He kissed her hungrily as his hand traveled down to rub against her core, causing her to moan loudly into his mouth and hold onto him. 

"Jungkook..." she gasped.

Proud to feel her getting so wet for him and being so responsive to his touch, he kissed up her neck and whispered in her ear, "I'm right here,"

They've been here before. They have done this a handful of times since Prom Weekend and each time felt amazing as he knew how to make her feel good with his hands and tongue. 

As he kissed every inch of her body, being vocal about how beautiful she was and how beautiful her black skin was which continued to make her dizzy, Jungkook began to kiss down her body. While he kissed down her stomach, she let out a gasp and began breathing heavily once his lips kissed around her hips and inner thighs. Finally, he was face to face with her entrance. He was pleased to see how wet she had become and it was all for him as she was anticipating what he would do next.

His mouth got to work, kissing her thighs and landing right to her core as her heavy pants were heard throughout the bedroom, which was music to his ears. Jungkook felt her grip fistfuls of his silky hair as he swirled his tongue around her folds, starting at a slow pace since he wanted to take his time to enjoy her. His tongue felt warm and soft against her as he licked his way up to her clit.

"Ah, Jungkook!" she cried out as her hips jolted at the sudden sensation.

As he continued, picking up the pace to lick and suck her clit, he felt her remove her hands from his hair and try to move away because the pleasure was beginning to make her feel like she wouldn't be able to handle it. However, Jungkook was having none of it and pulled her back to his mouth and kept her firmly in place, digging right back in.

"I-I can't—fuck!" she moaned, squeezing her eyes shut as she threw her head back into the soft mattress. 

She wasn't going to be able to take much more of this as she felt vibrations against her from his chuckle, sending shivers up her spine. Meanwhile, Jungkook looked up with lustful eyes, enjoying the view of her looking disheveled with her mouth open.

"Yes, you can," he encouraged. "You're taking it so well like you always do,"

He felt a sense of pride. No one else was able to make her feel the way he made her feel. And he enjoyed the fact that he caused this reaction from her and only him. He continued to devour her, paying attention to her cries of pleasure. Instantly after that, her entire body tensed up as she shuddered and cried out his name. Smiling to himself, he kept his head buried between her thighs as his mouth was slick with saliva and her juices. Pulling away, with his mouth glistening, he licked his lips.

"You all right?" he asked with a soft smirk, feeling a bit smug that he left her in shambles.

As she steadied her breathing, she finally was able to speak, "Hm-hm...it's like...every time you do this you get better,"

He smiled at her praise. "The motivation is you,"

She smiled at his reply. They truly loved each other. And now they were expressing it on a whole new level. She felt so safe with him and felt amazing so far. Deep in her thoughts, her eyes began to roam down to his physique, admiring the view. Those arms...those thighs...everything. He looked beautiful and she felt so lucky to call him hers. 

"Normally, I'm the one caught in a trance. Like what you see?" he raised a brow in a teasing manner, making her look back up at his doe eyes.

She giggled. "Caught red-handed,"

Reaching out for him, she pulled him to hover over her as she crashed her lips against his.

"Are you okay to continue or do you need a break?" he murmured against her lips.

"I can continue," she replied, helping him take his jeans off.

As he tossed the jeans off the bed, Jennie noticed the bulge in his underwear and reached out, wanting to pleasure him but he gently stopped her. 

"I want to focus on you, tonight," he said softly. "Another time, okay? Let me take care of you. I've been dreaming about this moment for a long time...tell me what you want and I'll give it to you. I'll give you anything and everything, Jennie..."

Her heart pounded at his words as she cupped his left cheek, thumb caressing the little scar on his cheek. 

"Jungkook, please...I need you," she begged, making his dick throb while he sweetly kissed her body again. 

It took every ounce of strength from him to not let her wish be granted just yet. He still wanted to make sure she was well prepared for him.

"I know...I know...just a little longer," he murmured against her skin. "I love you like this...I love your beautiful skin...your lips...your shoulders...your arms...your hands..." 

As he called out each body part, he moved to kiss them as he continued to take his time with the foreplay which began to drive her crazy with her need for him increasing tenfold. He kissed every inch of her body once again and made mental notes of all her sweet spots. Even though he also had lube to assist, he meant what he said when he wanted to take his time and make her feel beautiful as he whispered sweet nothings to her.

When he finally felt like she was ready, he slipped out of his boxers and she finally got a look at all of him as she laid on her back. From his broad shoulders, strong arms, and thick thighs, to his hard length slick from anticipation, she loved everything about him as she bit her bottom lip softly, enjoying the view. He was so captivatingly handsome and no longer the little boy she met at Big Hit when they were younger. He was a man whom she fell in love with and is proud to call hers. A man who has made her feel desired and gorgeous all night. A man who she's giving herself to.

A man she loves deeply.

Watching him put a condom on along with putting a generous amount of lube, her stomach flipped with anticipation. Lining himself up at her entrance, he met her gaze and they both smiled.

"You ready?" he breathed.

"Yes. I love you," 

"I love you, too," he immediately replied.

He hovered over her and gave her a deep, passionate kiss as he pushed his tip in slowly and entered her. As she felt him push all the way in, she moaned into his mouth and held onto him tightly. The stretch felt good and it didn't hurt as much as she anticipated. Honestly, the way he prepared her was a great thing as she felt more pleasure all around.

"Fuck...you feel amazing," he groaned.

He felt like he was in heaven at how good she felt around him while his head was on the crook of her neck. He kept himself still for a moment to allow them both to adjust to this new feeling as he breathed heavily with her. It felt like a big stretch and she felt full. But damn did he feel good and he didn't even move yet.

"Are you ok?" he whispered.

"Hm hm," she breathed.

"Let me know when to move. I'll try not to cum too quick...you feel so good," he sounded a bit strained as he tried to control himself. 

They remained still for a while and Jungkook lifted his head to take a good look at her with love in his eyes. This was another sight he'd never get tired of and wanted to experience over and over again with her under him like this. 

She reached out and cupped his cheek. "You can move,"

"Okay. I'll go slow,"

Their bodies pressed together heatedly with Jungkook slowly thrusting into her with ease as he grunted along with her gasps and whimpers. It felt so good. Better than she ever imagined. 

So this was how it felt to be intimate with someone you love. She felt euphoric.

He kept the pace slow, careful not to hurt her, and found a sensual rhythm after a few thrusts. Picking up his head, he watched her with adoration while maintaining eye contact with her.

"I love you so much...you feel so good. Better than I ever imagined..." he moaned.

He noticed she was trying not to be loud and was keeping a lot of sounds to herself. But he wanted to encourage her to break out of that and it was all for his ears only. He kissed her sloppily and pressed his body against hers again with his head on the crook of her neck.

Grunting in her ear, he spoke, "It's okay, Jennie. Let it out. It's just us. I want to hear you,"

He began to pick up the pace a little, causing her to cry out and lightly scratch his back. She held onto him tight as her panting and moans increased in volume. When he heard her beginning to moan out his name, he smiled to himself.

"That's it...good girl," he praised with a huff. 

She involuntarily clenched around him, causing him to moan. That nickname was going to be dangerous in the future she could already tell from the way she reacted positively every time he called her that. Because of her sudden reaction to it, his confidence continued to boost.

Grabbing her hands, he pinned them to the bed on each side of her head and intertwined his fingers with hers as he continued to thrust into her.

Feeling her release, Jennie cried out his name with her body stuttering. As she rode out her high, Jungkook soon followed as he groaned out her name. His body shook violently as he filled up the condom and collapsed on top of her, panting heavily.

He rolled off of her, removed the condom, and placed it in the wastebasket next to the bed. Immediately he pulled her into his arms and held her as they came down from their high.

"Wow..." he sighed deeply with a big smile.

She giggled and looked up at him.

"Wow..." she replied breathlessly.

Wow...they just took the next step in their relationship and it was something they were always going to remember. Jennie had a dull ache between her thighs but she felt amazing. She felt treasured and she felt important. He took his time with her and made her feel beautiful. They both were sweaty from their physical activities and tangled in the sheets as they smooched again, soaking in the euphoria. 

"Are you all right?" Jungkook asked in a gentle voice with a smile as she looked at him.

He admired the afterglow on her face as he thought she was the most beautiful person he ever laid eyes on.

She cupped the side of his face and beamed. "I feel amazing. Thank you."

"I'm glad you do. Did I do ok?" he hoped as she moved strands of hair sticking on his forehead.

"Of course. It was everything I wanted and more,"

"Good. I'm glad. Does anything hurt?"

"Not really. You prepared me, well. And the lube was a bonus, too. A few friends of mine told me how it hurt them for their first time so I was trying to mentally prepare for the pain but...with you, I was in bliss,"

He smiled at that as his heart pounded. "I was in bliss with you, too,"

Jennie truly was in a state of utter bliss, right now. She felt so good and relaxed. Jungkook had been so loving and attentive for their first time.

"Honestly, I love it when you praise me, in bed. And I really love the things you do to me...how you make me feel. Physically and emotionally,"

She could sense his confidence boosting even more from her compliment as a big grin came across his face. 

"That makes me very happy. So, I can keep calling you my good girl in bed?"

She giggled. "Yes. It makes me feel good and makes me feel like I'm doing a good job,"

"You're always doing a good job. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to us. I like it when you're vocal and the way you hold onto me. Don't be timid about it, okay?"

"Okay, I'll do my best,"

"We need to work on you not running from me when I'm trying to give you head," he teased.

"I...listen...it's..." she couldn't find the right words as he laughed, making her chuckle. "You do it so right, I can get overwhelmed with the pleasure. I didn't think I was going to be able to handle it,"

"You handled yourself, well. And you'll continue to. Also, I think you scratched my back a little,"

"Oh gosh, I'm sorry. I hope it's not too bad,"

"I liked the feeling, it's okay. It did have me thinking about the future. If I'm able to get this reaction out of you now then...what about the other things I want to try with you because there are a lot of things I want to try...a lot,"

She felt her stomach flip at the way his gaze intensified when he said that. "Me too. I kind of...want to see how it is in front of a mirror, one day,"

"Thinking ahead, too, huh?" he smirked softly at the thought. "I'm curious, as well,"

She decided to lay on her back, looking at the ceiling while he chose to lay on his side and propped his head in his hand as he watched her.

"Wow...I remember when I first saw you..." she said with a smile as he listened attentively. "I walked past you a few times when I was still training. You didn't notice me but I'd see you from time to time at Big Hit. You were so focused on your training. And it was always a treat to catch a glimpse of your smile. I always loved seeing you smile. I was closer with Tae at the time since he was the only BTS member I knew but he'd talk about you and the rest of the members and I was just praying...just hoping that I'd get chosen as Miss Bangtan when I auditioned,"

"And here we are," he spoke up.

Turning her head to him, she chuckled. "And here we are. Over the years...being your best friend and learning and growing up with you have been some of the best moments of my life. And being here in this moment with you...being your girlfriend...is when I'm the happiest,"

Jungkook's eyes softened as he listened to her. "And I'm the happiest with you. Always. You taught me a lot of things and you're still teaching me. You taught me how to love. And how to express myself,"

She smiled at that. "I'm glad. Thank you. I'm happy you made me wait. This was perfect. Wow..."

Jungkook watched her with heart eyes as she rambled. He couldn't help himself and blurted his thoughts out loud, "You're so beautiful,"

Hearing him say that caused her to stop talking, feeling flushed at the sudden compliment. She giggled as he looked at her lovingly. Hiding her face in his chest made him chuckle as his heart leaped.

"I'm serious, Jennie. I'm happy. I'm happy to be here with you in this moment,"

Looking up at him, she responded, "Keep it up and you're gonna make me fall in love with you harder,"

He grinned and leaned down to kiss her, wrapping an arm around her. Jennie was already down bad. She couldn't get enough of him and didn't want this to end. She wanted to stay here forever if she could.

As they cuddled and rested in bed in a comfortable silence, Jennie spoke, "What are you thinking about, Jungkook?"

"What you said earlier. I remember my first thoughts when I first laid eyes on you at Big Hit," he brought up as his fingers began to trace over her curves. "I caught a few glimpses of you during the trainee days. Before we officially met when you were declared Miss Bangtan. I always thought you were so pretty. Me and my shyness prevented me from trying to approach you to say hi but whenever I saw you train, I'd stop for a moment to watch you work. You worked so hard and there was a unique fire in you that made you stand out from the other girls. And I had hoped you'd be the one to become Miss Bangtan,"

"And here we are,"

He chuckled at her response since he had said that earlier. "Here we are. I was so happy. And then I got to know you and asked you to be my Golden Best Friend. We confirmed it with friendship rings and did everything together. And I couldn't help but start to fall in love with you and that scared me because I didn't want to ruin our friendship. But as we got older and I finally had that confidence to tell you how I felt...it became one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. I'm really happy that you're mine,"

"Jungkook..." she cupped his face and smiled. "I'm really happy that you're mine, too. We'll be together for a year in a few months. Time flew, huh?"

"Yeah, it did. Wow...a year already?"

"Seems like just yesterday I told you I loved you, too in your room. And since then, every day has been an adventure,"

"A fun one at that. I just want to be the best boyfriend, ever. Your first and last,"

"You will be my first, last, and always," she said as he played with her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers.

"Are you ready for our reveal?" he asked, since later this year they'll be revealing their relationship to the public.

"Yeah. I am. I'm going to miss this. Miss the privacy and everyone not knowing anything but I know Dispatch knows we're dating. But at least we can beat them to it and say our truth. I'm mentally prepared for it. I know you'll be by my side through it all. I have nothing to worry about when I'm with you,"

"I'm happy you know that. We'll be fine. Just like what I told you when I confessed. I meant every word. No one is going to take you away from me so easily. I'll stand next to you through it all,"

Time passed as they continued to be in each other's arms to talk. Angelina was right, pillow talk was definitely the best.

While Jungkook listened to her talk, he thought about how connected he felt with her after everything. He was never going to let her go. Not after all this. Jennie noticed his expression change which caused her to stop talking. The way he stared deeply into her eyes with deep longing made her stomach flip.

"A-are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah...I just can't get enough of you," he leaned down to start kissing her lips again, slowly turning them over as he hovered over her.

She gasped and held onto him when she felt him grind into her.

"A-again?" she asked keenly, melting into his touch as his hands roamed over her body.

"Again. I'm not done," he responded as she giggled. 

Jennie was happy that they were on the same page with this. She wanted to ask to go again and wondered how to bring it up. His dick felt nice and introduced her to a whole world of pleasure and she couldn't wait to try different positions. Also, who knows when they will have alone time like this, again? Especially for the whole day. So they should take advantage of this moment.

Jungkook wasn't expecting himself to be hard again so suddenly but this was Jennie who he had in his arms. Who he kissed over and over again and made love to. Who he had longed for since he could remember. He wanted to do everything with her and his desires began to take over.

"Are you still flexible?" he suddenly asked.

Flexible? Just what did he have in mind? The question weighed in her mind as she thought of how she should answer.

Feeling playful, she replied in a teasing manner, as her hand went down to his hard length, "Hm...why don't you find out?" 

Groaning from her touch, Jungkook's ears perked up when she asked that enticing question.

Was that...a challenge?

"Challenge accepted," he said huskily in her ear, making her shiver.

It didn't take long for them both to be ready for the next round as he went to grab another condom to put on. On his knees, he heard her let out a surprised yelp when he quickly grabbed her ankles and swiftly pulled her to him as his pupils dilated.

"I always wanted to do this to you," he grabbed her legs and placed them over his shoulders.

He kissed her right ankle softly and looked down at her while placing a warm and firm grip on her hips. She felt even more vulnerable and excited to be in this new position as she tried to prepare for what was about to happen.

"Just tell me if it's too much or if this hurts, okay? I'll go slow, first," he reassured.

Once she confirmed that she would do as she was told, Jennie cried out when he pushed in and began to move at a slow pace to get her used to the new position. Now this position felt even deeper and had her louder as she gripped the sheets and let out a series of curses from how good it felt. Pants left Jungkook's lips as he kept his eyes locked on her while Jennie's eyes were closed, overwhelmed with pleasure.

"Look at me," he demanded.

Managing to open them to meet his ardent gaze, short, ragged gasps left her.

"W-wait—Oh my God!" she cried when he began to pick up the pace, leaning forward, bringing her knees to her chest as he placed his palms on the mattress, on either side of her head.

She tried to grab onto anything she could. The sheets, his torso, his hair, anything as she kept her eyes on him, watching his face contort in pleasure. His eyes were as dangerous as that sultry stare he kept on her and he was using all of it to his advantage to make her tremble underneath him. When she told him to find out if she was still flexible, she wasn't expecting him to bend her this early on as his hips snapped faster.

Her release hit her in waves as she screamed with her body shaking. With one last powerful thrust, his body twitched and he released into the condom. Both were shaking and breathing heavily as they stayed in the position with him looking down, enthralled by her.

"Shit...Where did you learn that!?" she exclaimed, catching her breath, feeling the after effects of her high.

He chuckled and leaned down to lock lips with hers as his tongue brushed against hers. Pulling away, he smiled. "Ah...I hope you won't get mad but I've been asking Namjoon Hyung for some advice,"

"Me? Mad? After what you just did to me, are you crazy? I need to thank him,"

He laughed as she giggled.

Jungkook felt like Namjoon was the best to have serious discussions on topics regarding taking that next step in the relationship. He loved all his hyungs and trusted them. And with Namjoon, he felt like he could confide in him the best about being an attentive boyfriend in the bedroom. And overall, the best to go to for any advice. He was a great leader and a great friend.

"I am not complaining whatsoever...oh my God..." she sighed deeply. "That was amazing,"

As they continued to catch their breath, Jungkook hadn't pulled out yet.

"Just let me...let me stay inside you just a little longer. You feel too good," he told her as she enjoyed the sensation.

He relished the feeling of being inside her. The warmth of her around him. He was happy to be vulnerable with her and be able to express himself like this. After a while, he slowly pulled out of her to remove the condom and throw it in the trash.

"Stay right there, I'll be back," he said and got out of bed.

Turning on her side to watch him, she spoke, "Nice butt,"

He chuckled and raised an eyebrow suggestively at her before leaving the room. Moments later, he came back with two bottles of water and a wet washcloth. Handing her a bottle while setting the other on the nightstand, he got back in bed.

"Thank you," she smiled and opened it to gulp some water. 

The cool drink quenched her dry throat and she was grateful. Especially due to the amount of yelling and screaming she had been doing because of him.

"Let me clean you up a bit," he said and used the washcloth to gently wipe her down. 

They both were sweaty and spent from their activities as sleep was heavy on their minds. After he wiped her down nicely, he turned off all the electric candles in the room and got under the covers with her. Pulling her into his arms, she laid on his chest with her chest flushed against his as he put the covers over them. 

"You all right?" he asked, sleepily.

"Hm-hm...I love you..." she murmured sleepily as she snuggled into his chest.

"I love you, too," he kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes.

----------

In the morning, the bedroom was brightened with the sun peeking out. Still under the sheets and lying on her own side of the comfortable bed instead of on top of Jungkook, Jennie began to stir in her slumber.

Opening her eyes, she stretched and laid on her back. Her body felt a little sore from last night's physical activities and her face flushed, remembering what had happened. A smile tugged on her mouth as she thought about how good Jungkook made her feel. Was this what it was like to be with someone you truly love? She felt like she was on a high. Warm and fuzzy feelings filled her heart as she was elated.

Turning around, she was greeted by the beautiful view of a naked Jungkook still sleeping. His hair was messy and the bed sheet was covering his lower body, showing off his toned chest and abs. His face exuded calmness as she watched him with a smile and looked at him with a deeper love. After last night, their love for each other amplified and they were even more affirmed in their feelings.

She kissed his nose and turned her back to him to grab her phone off the nightstand. She focused on answering birthday messages from yesterday and thanked friends, family, and fans for all the love. 

Feeling the bed move, she set her phone down on the mattress and felt Jungkook wrap an arm around her, pulling her to his firm chest.

"Mm...good morning," he greeted in her ear, making her shiver.

Oh...his morning voice was a whole new level of sexy. His voice was rough and deeper and she even heard a bit of his Busan Satoori accent. 

Before she could speak, he gently moved her onto her stomach and began to place soft, sensual kisses on her shoulder and down her back, making her breath hitch. His lips traveled down her spine as she trembled and he found himself going lower.

"Ah! Stop!" she laughed and squirmed when he went to gently bite her left ass cheek, feeling playful this morning.

She felt him chuckle against her body as he kissed back up her spine with his length hardened. Pulling her back against his chest, as they began to lay on their sides, she looked back and crashed her lips against his deeply.

The both of them were all over each other, unable to get enough as they kissed and touched each other like they did the night before. Both ready for round 3, Jungkook slipped on another condom as they laid on their sides, spooning. Sliding in smoothly, she gasped as he held her close, with her leg over his, thrusting in and out at a luscious pace while she pushed back with each thrust. 

They can get used to this. Being able to love each other this much without any interruptions. Their moans and heavy breathing filled the room as they made love once again. After they came down from their sweet release, with Jungkook pulling out and throwing the condom away, Jennie snuggled into his arms.

"Good morning. Can't keep your hands off me, huh?" she giggled after kissing him tenderly.

"Not after last night. And I just wanted to make sure I wasn't dreaming that last night happened. I'm happy this is real. How are you feeling?"

"Me too. I feel good. Just a little sore but I'm fine,"

"Did I do too much?"

"No, you're fine, Kook. You made me feel special," she answered while he kissed her temple.

They stayed in bed for another hour, enjoying each other's company, and proceeded to get ready for the day. Jennie put her hair in a high bun and planned her outfit for the day, setting it out on the dresser of the bedroom. Putting on her shower playlist to play on a small speaker in the bathroom, the two began to shower together. This was a whole new level of intimacy as they smiled at each other and reminisced on last night.

They showered but before they could turn off the water, the two found themselves all over each other once again. This time it was Jennie who had initiated it, pulling him to her wet body as the warm water rushed down Jungkook's back. Her heavy breathing and moans mixed with the running water as she writhed under his touch.

"You want to do this in the shower?" he grunted against her ear as her hands released his length.

"Wait...condoms. We don't have any," 

"We do. I put one condom and a specific type of lube that'll work in the shower for it. Right here," he pointed to one of the shelves of the shower.

As he said, there was a packaged condom and lube to assist with the shower. She was surprised. He really thought of everything.

"Wow, you really had this all planned out for me, huh?" 

"Just in case," he grinned sheepishly. "There are a lot of places I imagined us in...this is one of them. So, we could try it here. See if we like it, if you're up for it. I don't want to overdo it or anything if you're tired,"

"Overdo it? Nah, come here. I'm never going to get enough of you. I can handle another round," she pulled him back, backing up against the cold tile which made her shiver slightly.

He smirked. "Your wish is my command. I'm never going to get enough of you, either,"

As they kissed repeatedly, the shower water ran down his back while they were all over each other. They didn't know how much time had passed as they explored their bodies in this new environment for lovemaking but all that was on their minds was each other. After grabbing the condom to put it on himself, he used a generous amount of lube.

"Hold onto me," he instructed after lifting her to hold her securely in his arms while she was pressed against the shower wall.

He slid right in, slow and sensual as they both gasped at the feeling. The two became lost in each other once again as Jungkook began to move at an agonizingly slow pace, to try to tease her. It began to work as she whined and held onto him tighter.

"Faster..." she murmured in his ear while his face was buried in the crook of her neck.

He heard her and chuckled as she felt the vibration against her wet body. He knew what she wanted but wanted to hear her say it louder.

"Speak up, Jennie. What do you want?"

Oh, this little shit...How could he have the strength to tease her like this? This wasn't fair.

Unable to handle the slow pace, she finally relented as she let out another curse and spoke up as requested as she begged, "Please...go faster!"

Giving her what she wanted, he immediately picked up the pace, making her cry out and hold onto him tighter. Moving his head he smooched her sloppily as she moaned and whimpered against his mouth. There was no way she was going to be able to survive this with the way he snapped his hips against hers. God...her head was spinning with the way he had her yelling out for him. She knew for a fact her legs were going to feel like jelly after this with the way he was making her feel. He felt so good and felt better every time they were intimate. 

She moaned his name loudly and clenched around him as she had her release. His hips snapped into her faster with his movements getting sloppier, groaning out her name as he followed her, both riding out their high together.

Still catching their breaths, they looked at each other with satisfied smiles and kissed again as he remained inside her, enjoying the feeling. After their shower, Jennie's legs felt weak and she almost fell until he caught her.

"Easy," he soothed. "You all right?"

"I am but my legs feel like jelly," she admitted.

"Yeah...I overdid it," he chuckled.

"And it was so worth it," she responded tiredly with a chuckle.

Turning off the shower, and grabbing a towel, he wrapped it around her body and carried her bridal style out of the shower. Gently laying her on her bed, he went back to the bathroom to dry off and wrap a towel around himself, walking back in the bedroom.

"I'll take care of you. Relax. I'm going to lotion you up and help put on your outfit. Then you'll rest up, all right?"

"Mm-hm," she responded tiredly again.

Her body was spent.

To pamper her like this even though her birthday was over was sweet. He lotioned her body and even massaged her while he did it to help with the soreness. Especially for her legs. He then helped her put on her sports bra, sweatpants, and a hoodie. After she was squared away, she immediately fell asleep as he chuckled at the cute sight. Readjusting her on the bed, he gently placed a pillow under her and placed the covers over her.

Kissing her cheek, he watched her sleep, feeling satisfied. He made love to her how many times, now? Made her say his name with ecstasy in her voice, how many times? She was his and he was hers. They were 100% locked in.

After she was taken care of, he grabbed his bag to put on his new outfit for the day, consisting of a similar outfit of a hoodie and sweatpants. He then gathered their scattered clothes from last night and straightened up the bedroom.

Gently closing the bedroom door, he let her sleep. While he waited for her to wake up, he brought his Switch and played it in the living room. After an hour passed his phone buzzed on the coffee table and he saw Namjoon calling.

"Morning, hyung," Jungkook greeted happily.

"Good morning. Are you two getting ready for breakfast?" he asked.

Breakfast?? Jungkook had forgotten that the group planned to go out to eat for breakfast. But he planned to make Jennie breakfast.

Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck as he got up to check on Jennie still sleeping and went back to the couch. "You mind if we both do a rain check? We'll be ready for dinner, later. She's still sleeping and I plan to make her breakfast in her room,"

Namjoon laughed at his response, having an understanding of what was up while Jungkook began to blush.

"Ah...Hyung, can you keep this between us?"

"Of course. I'm happy you two are happy and affirming your love for each other,"

"Thank you,"

"Is that Jungkook? Are they getting ready?" Jin asked in the background.

"It's him. They're going to eat breakfast together. They won't be joining us," Namjoon informed.

"What!? I wanted to see Jennie and spend more time with her after he hogged her all day,"

"We ate breakfast with her yesterday,"

"And I'd like to spend more time with my daughter, thank you,"

"Our daughter,"

Jungkook laughed at their banter and ignored Jin's complaining as he hung up the phone. He proceeded to make Jennie a Japanese breakfast. He planned out making her breakfast a few days before her birthday and went grocery shopping in advance. Once he finished making everything for them both, he set the dishes up on the coffee table while the TV was showing the news and how the weather was going to be today. 

Heading into her room to see her awake and scrolling her phone, he smiled. 

"Hey," he greeted softly.

Her face lit up when she turned to see him. "Hi...something smells good," 

She sat up and stretched, feeling refreshed as the soreness had felt more dull now and her legs didn't feel as weak as before. 

"Call it brunch. It's waiting for us," he proudly announced. 

"Brunch with you? How cute. What time is it?"

"It's past 1 now,"

"There is no way," she looked at the clock on her phone.

She was so fixated on continuing to reply to birthday messages and seeing the nice tweets from ARMY that she failed to acknowledge the time. It was truly past 1 pm.

"Jungkook!? Why didn't you wake me earlier? We were going to hang with Jimin and Tae, I just remembered,"

"Trust me, you needed the rest after what I did to you these past 24 hours," he reminded, causing her face to flush. "And it's a good thing we don't have a schedule today and you get to rest. So, it all worked out," 

"Okay, you got me there," she chuckled with him.

Reaching out to gently grab her, he easily lifted her in his arms to carry her to the living room and sat her down on the couch where their food was waiting for them.

"I already let them know we'll hang out with them, later. They're still here at the hotel. We'll meet them when ready," 

"Okay, cool. Wow, this looks delicious. Spoiling me, still?"

"Always. Let's eat,"

She took a bite of her steamed rice and praised him for his cooking as he felt great about himself. He loved hearing her praise him and thank him for the little things. Jennie was always vocal about the things he did for her and he appreciated that. 

As they ate, Jennie found a channel that showed a familiar anime that she remembered Taehyung mentioning. The two chatted about what they planned to do for the rest of the day and as they ate with Jungkook focused on the TV, she observed him in contentment.

So valued...so secure...she wanted this relationship to last forever. She truly believed she found the one. A walking green flag, he is. Someone so open and patient in loving her. Someone who truly sees her and is not afraid to love her, even in public. 

"What?" he grinned, sensing her looking at his face as he got lost in her eyes. 

"I love you, Jungkook," she said with a smile.

His bunny smile got wider as he leaned over to kiss her deeply. "I love you, too,"

After eating breakfast together, Jennie continued to open up her gifts and made sure to send texts and tweets to shout out everyone who had gifted her something. The two lovers continued to get ready for the day and made sure to cover up any marks from their physical activities since last night with concealer. 

Making sure she had everything, she left her room with Jungkook and placed a white cap on her head. "Okay! Let's meet up with Jimin and Taehyung,"

"Onward!" Jungkook smacked her butt and walked beside her as she giggled.

----------

The couple met up with the other half of the Maknae line so they could do some sightseeing for the day. Meeting them outside, the four of them began walking. Jimin and Taehyung began to notice Jennie and Jungkook acting closer than before and peeped at how Jungkook seemed to act clingier in a way. And there was a sudden glow about Jennie that could not be ignored as she smiled happily. Curiosity popped up between the two as they wondered what happened.

"Ennie! So, how was your birthday? It's been all day and now we see you? Are you all right?" Taehyung asked with a grin.

"Yeah! It was so much fun! We went to Universal and we got to see Harry Potter World! Butterbeer is SO good! And yeah, I'm fine. I was catching up on sleep. I was up all night," 

A low chuckle escaped Jungkook's lips as he thought about the context of her statement and smirked to himself. All the memories of her under him came back as he thought about how crazy they were about each other. Catching the reaction, Jennie locked eyes with her lover and felt her face warm up as she chuckled softly. 

Jimin and Taehyung glanced at each other as they watched closely at the couple's body language and reactions to her statement.

"Jeon Jungkook...Jennifer Walker." Jimin called them out.

"Yeah? What is it?" she asked, reluctantly turning away from Jungkook to look at him.

"What, hyung?" Jungkook asked as his lingering gaze on her stayed. After a moment, he finally turned to Jimin to see what he wanted.

Jimin narrowed his eyes, observing them suspiciously while the couple raised an eyebrow.

"Mm-hm." Jimin nodded to himself and glanced at Taehyung.

"Mm-hm?" Taehyung glanced back and Jimin nodded in response. 

"Mm-hm..." they both said and gave each other knowing looks, chuckling to themselves.

"So, Jennie, was Jungkook golden in lovemaking, too?" Jimin teased with a grin.

Jungkook let out a cough, looking shooked while Jennie widened her eyes and turned away.

"He was! Oh my God! You two finally did it!? It took you both long enough! And why didn't you tell us this, earlier!? Our ship has sailed to NEW heights!" Taehyung cheered.

"Why would we do that!?" Jungkook exclaimed.

Jennie groaned. "This isn't something the whole world should know."

"But we're the Maknae Line! We tell each other everything!" Jimin whined.

"Oh my God..." Jennie sighed.

"Oh my gosh, do your sisters know that their baby sister is-"

"NO!" she cut Jimin off.

"Does Jin know!? His reaction will be priceless!" Taehyung laughed.

"NO! And we'd like to keep it that way!" Jungkook exclaimed.

"So, this is why she was walking a little funny," Jimin laughed loudly while Taehyung giggled.

Jennie pushed her cap down to hide her embarrassment as she looked down. Her face was on fire from their constant teasing while Jungkook went to hit them both.

"Hyung!" Jungkook shouted, face getting pink.

"What? We think it's adorable! If you need any alone time, we can help!"

"Yeah! It's nice to see our Golden Couple so close as of late," Taehyung added with a boxy smile.

"So, Jennie, was Jungkookie manly?" Jimin teased, raising his eyebrows.

"Chill!" Jennie whined, covering her face.

"Let's go!" Jungkook grabbed her hand and walked away while the 95 Liners continued to laugh out loud and ran after them.

--------

Later in the evening, all of Bangtan went out to eat in a private area for dinner to catch up. Jennie sat in between Jungkook and Hobi as they all ate their food happily. Jen settled for ramen and devoured the noodles with delight.

"Well, it's finally good to see you, Jennie. Where have you been all day? We tried to get a hold of you for breakfast but Jungkook said you were still sleeping," Jin brought up. 

"We ate breakfast together," she answered with a smile.

"He hogged you all day yesterday and even all morning. It's good to see you, now," Yoongi added.

"Haha, it's good to see you guys, too! I just had a long night and slept in. But my birthday was fun!" she replied, smiling brightly.

"What did you do? I saw your tweets at Universal! I want to go next time,"

"We all gotta make a trip there, it was a blast! The rides were lit," she enthused as she recapped her time with Jungkook at Universal.

"Butterbeer, huh? I'm curious," Hobi added.

Dinner was filled with good vibes and silliness like always as everyone laughed at whatever jokes were said or silly acts were performed. Amused at Hobi and Taehyung's silliness, Jennie and Jungkook began clapping their hands while laughing, throwing their heads back.

Jimin and Taehyung glanced at each other and grinned. Now they were doing the same mannerisms as each other? This was too cute.

"You two laugh the same!" Taehyung giggled.

"Yeah! And you moved the same!" Jin pointed out.

"Lately it's like you two are starting to act the same, sometimes," Hobi added.

"We are?" the couple asked in unison which caused the guys to chuckle at their point being made.

"Usually Jungkook claps and laughs. Jen, it seems like you picked up on his habit. It's cute," Yoongi observed.

"Really? I didn't even notice," she giggled, glancing at Jungkook with a smile.

After eating, Jennie decided to do some last minute grocery shopping because she wanted to try to make a Japanese cake after coming across so many bakeries in Japan. She wanted to learn more about baking different types of sweets and decided to try to make herself a Japanese Strawberry Shortcake. She had tried one before and loved it and wanted to create her own version.

Wanting to keep her company, the Hyung Line decided to join her while the Maknae Line went to hang out somewhere else. Finding a grocery store that didn't have that many people, they began to shop while wearing their masks.

"What do you plan to make?" Jin asked while Hobi pushed Jen's shopping cart for her.

"Oh, so you know the Japanese strawberry shortcake? I've been researching how people make it and their techniques. I want to try to create my own," she answered happily.

"You sharing?" Namjoon immediately asked.

"I want a slice," Yoongi spoke up.

"Me too~!" Hobi cheered.

"If there is anyone who deserves a slice, it's me! You are sharing, right, Jennie?" Jin asked, hopeful. 

She giggled at their enthusiasm. "Yes, I'm sharing. I'll let you guys know when I finish making it,"

The boys cheered at that, yelling happily as she laughed.

"Do you have the list of ingredients?" Yoongi asked.

"Mm hm. I have it on my phone," she answered while checking out the fruit section.

While they shopped, Yoongi began to research the Japanese Strawberry Shortcake on his phone and wandered off to grab recommended ingredients. Finding his group after a few minutes, he placed the ingredients in the cart.

"What's this?" she asked him.

"I read that these specific brands are the best for making the cake. Try it out, see if it'll enhance it," 

"Aw, thanks, Yoongi! I'll try it out,"

Yoongi smiled under his mask, happy that she accepted his suggestion. 

As they were finishing up their shopping with the boys carrying the bags for her, they began walking back to their hotel. But then, Jen's phone crashed onto the ground, being protected by her phone case after it slipped out her hands.

"Ahhhhhh~! Her phone dropped!" Hobi yelled while the guys began freaking out with him which startled her.

"Miss Bangtan dropped her phone! Holy shit!" Yoongi dramatically yelled.

"She dropped her phone! Her phone is down!" Jin cried.

"Her phone is on the ground!" Namjoon shouted as he and the rest of the boys gathered around the phone, looking down at it.

Jennie watched in amusement as they pretended to be a referee for a boxing match and began counting like it was a knockout.

"1!"

"2!"

"3!"

"4!"

"You guys are so dramatic! What the hell?" she laughed as she bent down to pick up the phone while they laughed with her. 

Once making it back to the hotel, she stayed in her room alone to work on her cake while Jungkook was still out. Looking back at the recipe and videos to make sure she followed the directions, she felt confident in having the cake turn out well. She worked hard as she followed every tip and direction, making the cake with love and putting her spin on it.

After a while, she heard a series of knocks on her door and Jen washed her hands and opened it to let Jungkook in.

"Hey! Welcome back," she gave him a sweet kiss after shutting the door.

"Hey, I missed you. How was shopping?"

"It was fun. I just finished the cake. You want to be my taste tester?"

"Hell yeah! How did it go baking it?" he asked as they walked over to the kitchen to see the delicious shortcake. 

It looked mouthwatering. The soft, fluffy sponge cake sat on a platter, decorated nicely with strawberries and whipped cream.

"I think it went all right. I didn't have any trouble when making it. I had some good references. I want to start trying new recipes to expand my baking skills,"

"So, I get to be your taste tester before you give it to the guys?" he asked happily.

She giggled. "Yes. They're eager to try it but I wanted you to try it first. I like hearing your opinions. Your feedback means a lot to me as well as your suggestions with everything,"

Jungkook smiled at that and kissed her temple. "How lucky am I? I'm glad to hear that,"

"Moment of truth. Let me know what you think," she cut a slice and placed it on a paper plate along with a plastic fork for him.

His doe eyes looked at the slice with delight as he picked up the fork to take a big bite. His expectations for her baking were always reasonably high because he was confident in how talented she was with her baking. No matter what she does, it always turns out well.

The Golden Maknae's eyebrows furrowed immediately as he continued to eat it. The cake was moist and light as the strawberries tasted sweet. Jungkook felt like he just bit into a cloud and whatever she had done for the whipped cream enhanced the cake even more. Meanwhile, Jennie watched him chew as nervousness was at the pit of her stomach. She was her worst critic when it came to baking new recipes and hoped she did it justice. 

As she observed him he looked...angry? Did it taste nasty?

'Damn, this is good. How did I get so lucky to have a girlfriend who bakes this well?' he happily thought.

Jungkook immediately ate another forkful, chewing it vigorously as he enjoyed every bite. He kept chewing while Jennie assumed it was a negative reaction and he just wanted to keep eating to not hurt her feelings.

"U-um...Kook? You good?" she asked with some nervousness in her voice.

Swallowing the sweet bite, he looked up at her as if nothing was wrong. "Yeah, why?"

"Why? You tearing that shit up but you look mad," she giggled. "Is it good or bad? You're making me a little nervous,"

He laughed at her concerns and reassured her, "It's amazing! And this is your first time making this, too? You did a great job. The right amount of sweetness and the cream is the best part. I want another slice!"

Relief washed over her as she smiled widely and kissed his cheek. So, if something tastes really good, Jungkook looks angry when eating it. Jennie made a mental note to remember that. 

#jungkook smut #bts 8th member #jungkook x oc #bts #bangtan boys #the bangtan gal #bts additional member #bts fanfic #bts fluff #jungkook fluff #jungkook fanfic #jungkook scenarios #bts fanfiction #bts fic #bts female oc #bts female addition #bts female member #jungkook x black oc #bts smut #bts x black oc #kpop fanfiction #kpop smut #kpop fanfic #bts scenarios #bts imagine #kpop black oc

[laughhardrunfastbekindsblog]

All through season 3, I was looking for reasons to let go of Tech, but hope just wouldn't die and until the finale I still thought there was a chance Tech would turn out to be alive and well. Even with this hope I found it... odd... that the show skipped over the inevitable conversation between Omega and Crosshair with Crosshair learning what happened to Tech. So I wrote this just a few days after the season 3 premiere and posted it to AO3 since I didn't have tumblr at the time. I'm posting it here now, mostly because the past few days this blog has turned into one of my ways of fully processing Tech's death.

NOTE: the first two sections are scenes directly from the show. I included them to clarify the timeline of events and add some detail as to what I imagine was informing Crosshair's thoughts and remarks during the second scene in particular.

Revelation

“Crosshair!”

No. It couldn’t be.

“Crosshair?”

He must still be dreaming, stuck in the nightmare…

“Crosshair?”

The voice sounded just like Omega, but that would mean Omega was here. And if Omega were here, that would mean his brothers…

“You must be Omega.” He knew that voice, and Emerie Karr’s statement removed all doubt.

“What did you do to Crosshair?” he heard Omega reply.

“He’s recovering. I tried to warn him what would happen if he did not cooperate with the doctor….”

He kept his eyes closed, feigning continued unconsciousness, wishing he had never awoken.

**********

“Crosshair. I tried to come earlier, but there were too many guards watching me.”

Crosshair sighed. He had noticed Omega’s attempts to catch his attention when they passed each other in the halls, and had deliberately ignored her. He couldn’t very well do so now. “You shouldn’t be down here at all.”

“Well, how else are we gonna plan an escape?”

Where did the kid get her unfailing optimism? But hope was useless here – worse than useless. Best to disabuse her of any fanciful notions before she was crushed any further by the weight of disappointment. “There is no ‘we,’” he replied curtly as he sat up to face her, “and there is no escape. I’ve already tried.”

He wouldn’t tell her the details of what had happened: that the primary objective of his “escape attempt” had been to warn his brothers about the danger they and Omega were in. Omega hadn’t yet told him whether the message had been received, and Crosshair had no inclination to broach the subject. Believing he had failed in getting the message to his brothers was easier to stomach than knowing the message had been delivered yet still yielded this outcome.

Thankfully, Omega didn’t probe for details – she was still too focused on the prospect of freedom. “Every stronghold has a weak point,” she was saying now, before adding thoughtfully, “Maybe I can convince Emerie to help. She’s one of us.”

No. This had to be nipped in the bud. If Crosshair managed to teach the kid anything, it had to be this, the one crucial lesson that was even more important than learning that hope was pointless. “Not every clone is your ally,” he warned her firmly. “You trust too easily.”

Omega looked taken aback for only a second before resisting the lesson. “Maybe you don’t trust enough,” she retorted.

Crosshair wished he could think of precisely what to say to convince her of her errors in judgment, but his hand started shaking… Blast, he thought as he gripped his hands together, hoping Omega hadn’t noticed.

“Crosshair?” she said gently; and he knew she had noticed. Yet more proof that hope was useless.

He wouldn’t let her see any more. He didn’t need any more reminders of his shortcomings, his failures, his mistakes, his losses. If he couldn’t teach the kid just how futile it was to hope and trust, maybe he could at least convince her to stop doing things that would put her in more danger. “Just… go, before you make things worse for both of us.”

Omega hesitated only briefly before turning to leave, and Crosshair thought that maybe he had succeeded – but then she spoke once more. “There has to be a way out of here,” she said, determination adding a layer of steel to her tone. “I’ll find it.”

**********

“You’re awake,” she said cheerfully as she sat cross-legged on the floor.

Crosshair didn’t reply, only fixed her with a sullen stare that did nothing to dampen her spirits.

“No one said anything after I came here last time, so I think I might be able to keep visiting you,” Omega went on. “Of course, we’ll have to be discreet when discussing some topics…”

He couldn’t ignore her when he was stuck in a cell, and she was going to keep visiting… “Why are you here?”  he cut in sharply.

Omega paused mid-sentence, the slight crease that appeared on her forehead attesting to her confusion even as she gamely shifted topics. “I… well, I don’t have an escape plan yet, but I thought I could…”

“No,” he brusquely interrupted her again, waving his arm to gesture toward the hallway in an attempt to make his meaning clear. “Why are you here, on Tantiss?”

“The Empire captured me,” she answered in a low voice. “I think they want me to make Nala Se cooperate with them.”

Crosshair growled in frustration at the kid again missing the meaning of his query – he had to know, but that wouldn’t make the knowledge any easier to bear. He tried one more time, “What happened?”

Omega went perfectly still, and Crosshair’s heart sank. This is precisely why he had avoided asking about his brothers’ fates; but not knowing meant he could only imagine the worst possibilities. He didn’t let a shred of emotion show on his face, however, as his sister finally moved to reposition herself so she was no longer directly facing him, instead sitting in profile, gazing down the hallway as she wrapped her arms around her knees.

“We… Tech was going through some intel for Echo when he found out you were captured, and then he found the message you sent to warn us. We were trying to track Hemlock’s ship so we could find you. We knew Hemlock would be meeting with Tarkin on Eriadu, so we infiltrated the base to place a tracker on his ship. But…” she faltered, then everything spilled out in a flood of words. “Everything went wrong. We tried to escape, but there was an explosion at the base that left us trapped in a rail car with Imperial troops and ships attacking us. Tech was on the rail line to fix the car and he tried to make it back, but the car was breaking in half and falling off the track, and then the added weight…” Her voice broke, and she took a shuddering breath before soldiering on, “Tech fell, he severed the connection to the broken half of the car and he wouldn’t let us save him…”

The words were like shrapnel ripping through his heart. Hemlock seemed to think the interrogation droids were one of the most effective means of inflicting pain; the experiments were mentally and physically relentless, excruciating, exhausting; but this… This was true torture.

Omega had paused in an effort to regain her composure, wrapping her arms ever more tightly around her knees in an effort to stop shaking. Determinedly looking at the floor, she continued her story, her voice cutting through the void of Crosshair’s bereavement and bringing him back to the current situation with a painful jolt. The way she was rushing and stammering through her story, Crosshair could tell this was the first time she was really thinking about it, the first time she was allowing herself to relive the tragedy, reopening the painful wounds of this memory just so she could satiate his need to know.

He didn’t want to know any more – the worst thing he’d imagined had happened to one of his brothers. But he couldn’t manage to speak, couldn’t beg Omega to stop talking…

“Tech’s repairs worked, the car started moving, but we crashed and… I don’t remember much after that… I woke up and Hunter and Wrecker and I had all been bandaged up by AZI. Then Hemlock found us. Hunter told me to run, but I couldn’t leave them.” Omega’s chin was shaking so hard Crosshair wasn’t sure how she was managing to still speak so clearly. “Hemlock captured Wrecker and Hunter, and I tried to stop him, but one of his guards stunned me and I woke up on Hemlock’s ship.” She paused again; Crosshair, outwardly still and silent as stone, inwardly reeling from pain and shock, only peripherally noticed her bring her hand to her cheek to wipe away tears. “I had sent AZI to get Echo, though, so maybe Hunter and Wrecker managed to escape.”

The flash of relief upon hearing that Hunter and Wrecker and Echo might still be alive disappeared almost before Crosshair felt it, suppressed under the massive weight of sudden loss.

Tech.

Crosshair had always pretended to be even more annoyed than the others when Tech spouted off three datapads’ worth of information on the most mundane topics, but secretly he had been fascinated by how smart his brother was, how Tech not only knew the information but could seamlessly apply it to improve almost any situation. Hunter was the one with heightened senses, but Tech sometimes seemed even more skilled than Hunter in knowing exactly what Crosshair needed without Crosshair needing to say a word – and, being the most reticent member of the group, Crosshair couldn’t say he ever minded.

That was the thing about Tech: when it came to any given topic – including his brothers – Tech didn’t just know, he understood.

Crosshair didn’t have Tech’s skill in this area, but he knew and understood his brother well enough to fill in the details himself. Omega had said Tech had been the one to discover Crosshair’s imprisonment and the message, which meant Tech would have been the one to bring the fact to the squad’s attention, comb through intel that led to the discovery of Hemlock’s existence, and join the push for a rescue mission to be mounted despite the warning the message conveyed.

Omega and Crosshair now sat in silence for what may have been hours, may have been seconds – he would never be able to tell – before Omega spoke again. Despite the tears still silently falling down her face, her voice took on its signature hopeful note. “Maybe we can…”

‘Maybe’ was dangerous territory, and Crosshair – sick to his stomach, burning with regret and shame, broken and empty with no recourse available to him – could not let Omega continue. Tech was dead, and Crosshair could not allow himself to entertain the idea that maybe his remaining brothers were actually okay. ‘Maybe’ meant hope. Hope meant more pain.

“No,” he said, so sharply that Omega finally turned to look at him. The sight of her tear-streaked yet resolute face only deepened his agony. “No more plans. Can’t you see? It’s over.”

“But if Hunter and Wrecker escaped, that would mean…”

“NO,” he said again, glaring at the kid.

He wasn’t going to say anything else; but suddenly a sentence from Omega’s story struck home - we were trying to track Hemlock’s ship so we could find you – and his thoughts, his deepest regret, took form in words and slipped through his mouth before he could stop himself. “I told you to run. I told you all to hide. Why didn’t you hide?”

Omega’s eyes softened, and her sympathy made him drop his gaze to the floor. “Because we’re a squad,” she replied softly, “we’re family, and we don’t leave anyone behind.”

“Look where that got you,” Crosshair retorted bitterly. Look where that got Tech, he thought.

Footsteps sounding in a distant hallway seemed to remind Omega that she did not have unlimited time to spend on visits, and she hurriedly wiped her face again as she got to her feet. She didn’t immediately depart, however; and Crosshair, feeling her gaze on him, refused to look up.

“You’re worth the risk, Crosshair,” she said simply. “Tech thought so too.”

He remained as he was, staring at the floor, numb and broken and alone, long after she had gone.

**********          

“Crosshair? Are you awake?”

He gave a prolonged sigh in an effort to cover the fact that a tiny part of him was actually glad she had come to visit – it had been several weeks since the last one, and he had started to wonder if she had been outright forbidden from seeing him. “What does it matter? You’re going to talk anyway.”

She hesitated briefly. “If you need to rest, I can come back later…”

He groaned a little as he sat up – this round of experiments was leaving him increasingly sore, but he would never admit this to anyone, least of all Omega: she would spend the entire visit fretting about him. “It’s fine. I’m already awake.”

She regarded him for several long seconds before kneeling in front of his cell. “Sorry it took so long for me to come back. Nala Se kept giving me additional assignments. I think that phase of experimentation is over now. They don’t tell me much about what the experiments are, though.” She was quiet for a moment, before continuing, “I like taking care of the hounds a lot more than helping in the lab. Batcher is finally warming up to me – she doesn’t try to bite me anymore when I feed her. Oh, K9X1 finally told me a little more about the hounds…”

Crosshair listened as Omega continued talking about all the details she had learned about the species – their origins, development, life cycle, characteristics, and more – and wondered why he felt such a bittersweet ache in his chest…

Omega’s chatter reminded him of Tech.

Identifying the cause made the ache grow more potent, and Crosshair almost snapped at Omega to leave so he could busy himself with forgetting the tragedy. Over the past few weeks, he had thought he had come to terms with the loss of his brother – the shame, regret, and emptiness no longer felt like they would completely consume him – but in moments like these the pain would return in full force, and it was almost too much to bear.

And yet – right now, the ache wasn’t just bitterness and sorrow. There was a hint of solace, a touch of comfort, the warmth of nostalgia and happy memories, that took the edge off the pain. And, somehow, this comfort came from Omega.

Despite what Omega had said, he knew he didn’t deserve the risk his squad had taken for him. Tech shouldn’t have died for him, Omega shouldn’t have been captured because of him, the others shouldn’t be facing dangers unknown because of him. Knowing this, he wouldn’t let anyone else take such a risk for him again.

But Omega was feeling the loss of Tech just as much as he was. She had lost her brother, just as he had.

Crosshair wouldn’t encourage her insane ideas of the both of them managing to escape together; but if these visits made her current captivity easier to bear, he wouldn’t send her away.

Resting his forehead on his hands, he sat and listened to his sister.

#tbb #the bad batch #star wars the bad batch #star wars #tbb spoilers #tbb season 3 #tbb crosshair #tbb omega #tbb fanfiction #tbb canon compliant fanfiction #grief #dealing with grief #gone but never forgotten #rip tech

[biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer]

Gregariousness (Geo x Sociable and Loud! MC/Reader)

For @ch1mmichurry! Hope you enjoy Anon! :] - Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer Gregariousness: the quality of enjoying the company of other people.

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Geo…well…to say he resents noise would be an understatement.

He prefers solitude, silence, serenity. You, on the other hand, are the opposite of all 3.

You’ve always been the life of the party, the one willing to perform stupid stunts or sing karaoke because…as you quote: “Why not.”

You remind him way too much of Deryl, which he also doesn’t appreciate, but hey, you’re friends with his friends, so he’s got to deal with you.

Only starts warming up once he realises you’re not an obnoxious little shit.

When you befriend the others, and start trying to talk to him (his attempts at intimidation only put a small dent into your confidence, unfortunately); he’ll tell you to shut up.

Plot twist, you don’t.

In fact, you make it a goal to try and talk to him.

“Geode! How’re you doin’?”

“Piss off.” 

Until the day he actually gets angry at you (mostly for existing).

Then you get crushed into smithereens a smidge upset and stop trying to get him to warm up (dw you’ve got Deryl and Crowe for emotional support).

But he got so used to it he honestly misses it (to his disdain).

So he starts anonymously sending you gifts, and learns to play the songs you like (in secret, obviously)

Will claim he ‘happened upon them’ if he ends up playing near you at some point (idek maybe their school have a theatre or smth???)

Anyway, eventually decides he’s fond of you (Geo thinking he’s fond of you actually means he *really* likes you btw)

Will approach you every now and then (he’s gotta worm his way in first, like you did to him), to the stage where he’ll just ‘coincidentally’ be in the same spots as you.

To him, you’re like a beam of bright light that sears away at the walls he’s built up over several years, and part of him yearns for said walls to fall. (Sadly that part of him is teensy small and it’ll take a long time for him to fully open up)

Doesn’t actively attempt to murder you if you call him Geode after a while, as long as Deryl doesn’t find out. Then he totally would.

If you’re more physically affectionate, he’ll rarely let you give him headpats. He’ll pretend he fucking hates them, but by this point you know him too well.

Doesn’t exactly understand why you need to socialise so often, but he won’t stop you…he simply wants to know:

Who you’re with.

Where you are.

What you’re doing.

Are there people he resents there.

Are you going to drink.

And that’s him being lenient.

Seems to be the most nonchalant mf ever, but trust me, if he ends up liking you, he’ll end up stalking observing you, ensuring you’re safe and making sure to swoop in as soon as he decides you’ve talked to enough people that day.

Essentially, he won’t be fond of the need for interaction (isn’t he more than enough?) but he’ll last. He likes his alone time, after all.

You both agree to try and improve (you talk quieter around him, he tries to be a tad warmer), and, if this mutually beneficial relationship situationship works out, well. He’ll appreciate it.

The fact you - despite still being a walking, talking megaphone - still actively make an effort is good for him; he has patience, he can wait as long as both sides show commitment to the cause.

Will ask you out at the end of school, so if he you died of happiness, no nosy shitbiscuits will try and pull something. (I think he is the type to believe in the Evil Eye, at least somewhat)

Because albeit your nature, people adore you…or hate you, but you don’t care.

So yes, Geode does lov- appreciate you. And will continue to do so. For the rest of his life. What can he do? He’s in love with very fond of you!

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------- A/N: Gonna work on a set of headcanons/short story oneshots for a...pretty angsty idea I had. (I love angst so much it's a tad concering actually)...but no matter! Send requests my way, I'm more than happy to oblige with requests. :]]

#geo subaru oogami #reminder that geo is superior #geo oogami #tkatb #the kid at the back #deryl helianthus #geode oogami #make that a fucking tag #subaru geode oogami #geode ideology #spread it #like you spread butter on bread #it must be done #but uh enjoy #teehee #also ch1mmi if you want me to make you anonymous I will do so asap. #tkatb_vn #tkatb vn

[soongtypehuman]

Boo-hoo update

I’m sorry to say I have an update I was hoping to not ever have to make. Some of you already know that I have some serious health issues, but I've been pretty quiet about the extent of what I'm dealing with.

The gist of it is that I have a rare bone disease called fibrous dysplasia that turned certain bones in my skull into tumors and then those tumors grew inward and started crushing my brain, so I had a craniotomy last year to remove as much as was safe and got a cool new titanium implant in my head to replace the removed bone/tumor. The unfortunate result was encephalomalacia, which is the end stage of liquifying necrosis, and now part of my brain is liquid instead of solid (it’s dead, in a nutshell). Most people don’t survive encephalomalacia, much less remain able to function, and most who survive the initial stage don’t survive the three year mark. Even when you do survive it, it often continues spreading. The last MRI showed it had already taken over about 1/3 of my brain. But I’m a stubborn asshole and am still hanging on.

Unfortunately, things aren’t getting better.

I have to have constant MRIs, EEGs, physical and cognitive therapies, and have been on more meds than I’d like to be in order to control seizures and various cognitive issues. I didn’t mention this before, but I had to go through a series of speech therapies just to learn to talk properly again. And the most unfortunate part of this is that my ability to write has been affected. Since the surgery over a year ago, I’ve only made 10 new posts in the Positronic Rivalry series, totaling around 87k words. For reference, I posted over 200k words in 2022. I’ve posted even less this year, and it’s not improving.

With that said, I have to take a step back. I’m not quitting and I’m not walking away from the fandom. I’d like to think I’ll still be able to post here and there. I just don’t know when and under what circumstances that will happen. I most certainly can’t handle the longer multi-chapter fics I once could. Maybe one day, but not this day. Since I started posting on AO3 back at the end of 2021, I’ve posted every Sunday more often than not. I’m sorry to say I can’t make that happen right now, and can’t say when I’ll post again or what it will be. I won't be able to continue with season 4.

But I’m most definitely not leaving the fandom and the people and the characters I love so much. I’ll still be here interacting and posting when I’m able. This fandom and the people in it are incredible and mean a lot to me. Data and Lore and Star Trek in general are integral to my life and general enjoyment.

But!! I’ve nearly completed compiling seasons 1-3 of Positronic Rivalry as well as 2022/23 Kinktobers into files that will be ready to print in physical book format (completely free, obviously), which I’ll make available for everyone to download in various print sizes, complete with covers, which you can then have printed at various POD sites if you’re so inclined. Digital versions will also be available (you can already download various formats from AO3, but they’re not compiled into seasons, don’t have covers, etc.).

I’m also continuing with the Trek-themed crossword puzzles because those are fun and my therapist thinks making them is good for my cognitive rehab.

This update is a massive bummer for me, but I felt it was better to just admit my limitations instead of constantly trying to convince myself that I could continue the way I had been pre-surgery and beating myself up when I couldn’t.

Lastly, I’ve finally taken the suggestion I’ve gotten repeatedly and set up a KoFi. If you’d like to buy me a coffee or toss a coin to your android porn witcher, you can do so right here and I’d be giggling and kicking my feet in gratitude.

Anyhow, I want to thank all of you for being amazing and coming along on this ride with me for as long as you have, and for as long as it might continue in whatever form it takes.

#star trek #fanfic #fanfiction #star trek the next generation #star trek tng #data soong #commander data #lore soong #lore star trek #st tng #kofi

[phoebepheebsphibs]

Double-Mutated Mikey

Chapter 7: Habituation

Continued from the short story written by @boots-with-the-fur-club

Prev || Next

"Did... Did Mikey just sign at us?" Leo asks, eyes wide.

Mikey repeats the motion again.

'Talk. Talk. Talk.'

"I think he wants to talk," Raph mutters.

"I think he wants US to talk," Leo adds, looking down at his baby brother. "You don't like being left out of the conversation, huh?"

Mikey shakes his head. It's hard enough trying to communicate when you can't say anything, but cutting him out completely? That's simply not fair.

"Sorry, bud, we just... didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

Mikey signs again, bending his middle finger so that only his thumb and pinky are pointed, starting at the top of his head and dragging down just below his chin.

'Why?'

"Well, we were worried you might get... upset if we talked about it," Raph says, glancing between him and Leo. "I guess we shoulda remembered you know ASL..."

Mikey signs again, this time at Leo. He touches his hands to his chest, pivoting them towards each other twice.

'Animals?'

Leo gives him a confused expression. Mikey tries another one, his dominant hand forming a small fist with a finger pointing, mimicking a tail.

'Reptile'

"Oh... you read that?" Leo asks.

Mikey nods, a small chirp escaping from his throat.

"Well --" Leo looks up to Raph, who is waving his hand over his throat, trying to signal him to cut it out, don't say anything!

Mikey follows Leon's gaze back to Raph, who glances away and whistles nonchalantly, pretending to be distracted by something in the back of the room.

Leo snickers and rolls his eyes.

"You have some reptile blood in you now," Leo announces quickly.

Raph and Mikey's heads both snap back to him. Both of their eyes go wide, both of their jaws drop, yet their expressions totally different.

Mikey looks astonished and intrigued, a soft grin presses his lips as he contemplates what this means for him.

Raph looks utterly terrified.

"We think that might be why you got so agitated with the cold," Leo finishes.

Mikey shivers slightly, his hands trembling from the chills as he moves his arms back and forth, signing again.

'Cold. Not good. We don't like it.'

"We?" Leo asks.

Mikey blinks before signing again to clarify.

'Mikey doesn't like cold'

Leo does his best not to be put off by his brother referring to himself as a plural or in the third person, and chalks it up to just the fact that he hasn't used sign language in a long time, and is mixing up or forgetting certain words.

Raph picks Mikey up from the floor, cradling him close.

"How about we get you back to your room where it's and nice and warm, hmm?"

Mikey purrs happily, snuggling deeper into the towel and nuzzling Raph's plastron.

The trio walk back to Mikey's traincar, where Splinter is gathering more blankets and pillows.

"Ah, boys! I was just getting the bed set up."

Mikey wriggles out of Raph's hold and jumps to his father, squeaking and croaking out noises of happiness.

Splinter chuckles softly, petting his son on the head. Mikey's feline instincts start to take over, and he circles around him, nuzzling his head against his legs as his tail wraps his father's robe. Splinter's hand stays still, allowing Mikey's moving body to flow underneath it.

He holds the tip of his tail in his hands, gently rubbing his fingers over the slick and smooth scaly skin. He can feel the spikier ones that raise up when threatened, making Mikey resemble a stegosaurus -- though currently they are smoothed down.

Michelangelo hums at his father.

Splinter looks down at him, tears in his eyes as he examines the face of his youngest son. His baby, his sweet little boy that used to make him all kinds of drawings for fathers day and his birthday and Lou Jitsu appreciation day. The boy who learned to cook so that their ailing father didn't have to, when his depression caused aches and pains that wracked his aging body and kept him bedridden. The toddler that would beg his father to watch him dance, only for Mikey to just jump around and spin in circles to the rhythm of a new pop song while Splinter would clap and cheer with such adoration for his little boy...

Where is that child? Is he still in there somewhere?

Mikey looks up at him, concerned. His eyes sparkle, the yellow-tinted scleras and the glowing red irises and pupils covering up what used to be a white eye with dark green iris and black pupil. The colours are not the same, but the life and energy behind them are.

Splinter can't hold back the tears anymore, but he smiles profusely at his baby boy.

"There you are," he mumbles, crouching down to hug him tightly.

Mikey hugs him back, his tail twisting around them both.

After a few awkward minutes of silence, Splinter finally releases Mikey, who starts running around the room again playfully.

"Purple gave me a list of some tests he has planned for tomorrow," he recalls, wiping the last of the tears out from his fur and whiskers. "Small things, like an eye exam and saliva swab. He wants to try a blood test, if possible."

"Alright. Oh, by the way, tell him that Mikey has an aversion to cold now," Leo informs him. "And that he CAN understand us. We figured out how to use ASL with him."

Splinter's eyes widen with hope as he looks behind him at his baby boy. Mikey ignores them and their serious-sounding conversation, and instead jumps up into his hammock and plays around with the pillow before jumping back down, still looking around and getting reacquainted with his room.

"Very well. Are you boys sleeping with him tonight?" Splinter inquires.

Mikey attacks his pillow, grabbing it in his mouth and shaking it with a playful growl.

"We'll stay for a bit," Raph answers softly.

Splinter nods, grimacing at the cushion being ripped to shreds.

"I'll have to buy more pillows, I think..." he jokes half-heartedly.

Splinter walks over to Mikey and kisses his head. Mikey mews at him and purrs happily, the tip of his tail wagging.

"Goodnight, my sunshine," he whispers before heading out.

Mikey makes a small call out after him, like a tiny yowl or cheery whine. He's calling goodnight to him.

"Alright, Mikey, I think it's bedtime," Leo announces, stretching softly with an exaggerated yawn to convince him of the lateness.

"Aaaaawwhh!" Mikey howls. It almost sounds like an actual word...

Leo is shaken by how human the sound is. But then again, it almost sounds like a sad cat yowl if you think about it.

"No buts, big man," Raph interjects, taking over for Leo. "You fell asleep in the tub. You need your rest. Pops just brought you all these nice warm blankets and comforters, see?"

Raph holds up one of the freshly folded sheets under the hammock.

"So let's get you into bed and cozy, hmm? Yeah? Sounds good, right?"

Mikey's brow furrows, though the corner of his mouth turns up. It's as if his expression is trying to say "Really?"

Despite this, Mikey rolls his eyes and saunters over to the hammock, wiggling his hind quarters before leaping up again. He slithers under the blanket and gives out a single chirp of satisfaction.

"Good Mikey," Raph says, coming over to rub his brother's head. "We'll see ya in the morning, m'kay?"

Mikey moans at him, his eyes wide and sad. He wants them to stay.

"Alright, we'll stay," Raph sighs. He could never resist Mikey's puppy eyes before. Now it's as though he's even more of a puppy.

Mikey beams at him, chirping sweetly and cooing lovingly.

It takes all of five minutes of Raph rubbing circles on his head for Mikey to pass out.

"Is he asleep?" Leo whispers.

"No doubt about it," Raph chuckles. "Kid is in slumberland."

"Good," Leo sighs, taking Raphael's hand and leading him out of the traincar.

Once they are out, Leo starts whispering again.

"We need to talk. Mikey understood our conversation, so we can't do private conversations in ASL anymore."

"Okay? So, then what?"

Leo tapped his head.

"Ninja mind meld?" Raph questions, making doubly sure he understands.

"Just for the stuff we don't want Mikey hearing," Leo answers, "or reading."

"Like the deets about his mutation, for example?" Raphael grumbles. "We agreed we wouldn't tell him!"

Leo widens his eyes and taps his head again. Raphael hears his brother's voice in his mind.

We agreed that we wouldn't tell him about the ang-kray. But I don't think it's that bad that he knows he has reptilian traits, do you? And like Donnie said, he might even know that he has it already!

Raph grunts.

Fine. You're the leader now, you can decide what we do or don't do in this situation. I can't stop ya. But... I'm worried for him.

Raph scratches his arm, a habit born out of stress.

He's... he's just a kid. And you know how hard it hit ME when I knew I had the krang in me... Mikey... I don't want him to hurt like that.

He's probably already hurting, Raph, Leo responds, taking his older brother's hands in order to get him to stop scratching. He needs us to be honest and upfront where we can be. Yes, I agree that telling him about the krang is probably not the best idea right now. But eventually he will need to know. We can't keep that from him. I don't WANT to keep things from him. If I can help Mikey understand himself, then I will.

Raph sighs.

"You're right," he says out loud. "I just worry a lot... about him, especially."

"I know," Leo sighs, pulling his brother into a hug. "But it wasn't your fault that this happened."

Raph squeezes Leo closer.

"...But it is."

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