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#I mean 7 hours of actual attempts before I realized I need to get better to stand a chance.
vynnyal · 2 months
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Btw I'm basically speedrunning now
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returntosaturn271995 · 8 months
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Wednesday, September 6th: High on the beach
Got too stoned again.
I see this as a "re-framing" challenge. Basically, an intrusive high thought attempts to freak out my brain, and then I immediately negotiate the fear back from the edge with logic and compassion.
I realized when I was doing the dishes that I'm someone who cleans daily. Fresh new bedding, empty sink. Also, I run daily: I ran 27 minutes (including warm-up) of intervals today. There was no walking or break but jogging in between intervals. It was hard and I felt nauseated so I had to stop three separate times to catch my breath at the end. But I did run 17:56 minutes straight at one point, I went for a total of 2.54 miles, and I kept restarting until I had reached the very end. I saw it through, which is so much more motivating than giving up on the run because having paused means I "failed" or "can't" or that "if I finish it, it wouldn't count".
Count to who? Who am I doing this for? Oh yeah, ME. Fuck the charity money, I'm doing a 5K for ME. The kids still get their money, obviously a good thing, but if it were a free 5K I probably wouldn't have voluntarily donated. Because this isn't about the kids.
It's...about me. And that's okay because this is MY fucking journal and if it's ever okay to just talk about yourself non-stop if it's in your own journal. Not to get all meta: But I keep trying to be interesting in these entries when what I really want to do is brag. But hey, better to brag in something that no one will ever read as a healthy outlet to build self-esteem than at a party to some friends or hinge match.
But I get to brag. Journaling is my keystone. When I committed to consistently and (for the most part) accurately documenting my life, I started consistently doing my other improvements. By writing these entries, sometimes just lists of the little things I was doing to stay consistent, I was acknowledging myself and making me look forward to writing another good report the next day.
It made me think about why I was resisting some work. In therapy today, I realized I need to break down and ease into tasks and that the idea of "grinding" is what truly freaks me out. I was always told I was too sensitive, and that the world would be too hard for me, and to work hard meant to push past sensitivity. I was told that my frustration and fear weren't normal instead of radically normal.
So do the stops count on a run that was meant to be non-stop? Yep. They do to me. It's still the longest run I've gone on. The trick to running is to stay relaxed even while putting in effort. If you can't relax, stop until you can. That's true for fucking everything.
I didn't make myself push through nausea because feeling sick on a run isn't something to ignore, but to listen to. Rest days are important in running and so are rest breaks in the actual run if needed. I still pushed myself, but I wasn't grinding. I encouraged myself and I finished the run I had started even if I had to make modifications. I am a runner. A real one. Because I go often, not fast. I go consistently, not far.
And I'm getting better. I'm getting better all the fucking time. I have surprised myself with the things I have done. I used to only be able to run 7 minutes before getting tired. I have run almost an hour and a half this week and it's only Wednesday.
That's a big deal. If I can't feel that, ( even though the improvement still doesn't feel big or real enough) then I'm screwed. Trying and succeeding is the best fucking feeling in the world.
Remember trying? Remember how it works every time, all the time, always? THAT YOU ACTUALLY LIKE TO TRY?
Goddamnit. I used to think hope and self-esteem were just things you had or didn't have. I thought "hardworking" and "optimistic" were just things you were or were not.
But actually, they are things you practice.
Every day. You can wake up hopeless and self-inspire until you're back in fighting shape. You can wake up hating yourself, before reciting to yourself that you really are worthy inherently. That you have to have your own back to want good things for yourself. You can feel lazy and then practice leaning into the first couple of steps anyway. You can feel really fucking scared and unsure, but practice being logical and focusing on what's within your ability to improve.
Cheers to practice. To teamwork. Instead of feeling like life is in some final game.
I really do have time. I think I've never had more time in my life.
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anovel70 · 1 year
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January 2023 review
My life can now be summarized into work, Crossfit, and prostitution. I'm only enjoying one of the three.
Work is getting worse by the day. So much to do with no trainings on how to do it all.
I'm trying to get my PE for work so I can get another job, possibly in addition to the jobs I already have. I'm only working for the money and I don't care about company goals or values unless there's a benefit for me, such as business travel or opportunities to make more money.
It's frustrating because I messed up the relationship I had with my 2017 employer. I got fired just because I had one bad day. I was frustrated at the fact that I was almost two years out of college and still making $15/hour rather than a $60,000 salary. I realize that just because I have two jobs paying $80,000 now, that nothing could ever change the fact that no one wanted to hire me in the first place. I'm always the last pick. I should've had my PE done in 2020, not 2023. It just makes me really sad that I could've switched over to becoming an actuary much earlier if I had better social skills and luck.
I'm trying to build my body at Crossfit so at least I can say I tried to be what girls want me to be. I'd like to at least have another girlfriend before I turn 30, if not a wife. When I was little, I had a dream that I would end up married and have a few kids, because that's what was ingrained in my head. I didn't know that I was actually supposed to be attractive myself. If they told me it was this difficult, I wouldn't have lived for so long.
In February, I'd like to get more involved in stocks and study more on Exam 9. I might be taking Exam 6, just to try as well, since I'll have access to study materials for free. I'd like to get these two exams done in May, and Exam 8 and MAS II done in October, which leaves me with only Exam 7 to attempt, assuming I pass them all. I'm not planning on doing studying much longer since I want more money, which means more time with prostitutes.
For travelling out of the country, I'm thinking Japan and Europe in the same trip, then maybe Canada. In 2024, I'll do India and Europe, then maybe Mexico. Then in 2025, I'll use the first few weeks to travel to Canada or Mexico, any country close to the US, before my passport expires. Then that'll be it forever.
Because of my lack of social skills, it feels like gaming and writing down my feelings are the only things that comfort me. However, I'm not even good at either. It does seem like my life needs to end ASAP, but I want to experience prostitutes all over the world first. It's probably a waste of money, but it's the only thing that would make me happy in this world. No one wants to be my friend, no one wants to be my girlfriend. I'm not getting married. I have no future and I don't find anything in the world that's worth living for. I'm sure its been this way since 2008.
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thoughtsaladblog · 1 year
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Goodbye 2022
Here we are, yet again at the dawn of a new year. I’m currently spending my NYE like a totally cool person, i.e: alone in my house by choice! Although, no lie, I’m kinda digging it. Alone is where I thrive.
As I wonder at what fresh horrors await me (and this “great” nation) in 2023, I also look back at the year gone by. Honestly, even though last year swept by quickly it did still feel like the equivalent of 5 years. So much happened in the span of just twelve months that I still can’t believe that it was only a year gone by.
To begin with- I turned thirty. And with it came the fears of ageing and falling behind in life. But also a certain form of wisdom as well. I know I’ve matured in the span of one year more than I had in the last 5 years collectively. Sure, my disease may also have played a major role in the maturing but either way, a lot has changed in me. While I do still remain an avid overthinker- the things I tend to overthink about have changed. I dedicate much less time to worrying about dwindling relationships and people. My sole focus has been my work. This year I finally reached peak levels of workaholic, where I juggle four jobs, 7 days a week into the wee hours of the night. It’s been AMAZING! It’s exhausting but it feels so good to be productive. I mean I have no social life- save for maybe a week or so in April and a couple of weeks in December when I decide to come out of hibernation and socialise. But I feel so empowered. It feels good to make money, and to know that I survive completely off my own hard work and efforts. I’ve always liked the idea of being independent and it is my dream to be wholly independent as soon as I can.
So I’ve gone from worrying and wishing I could be younger and out having fun to finally seeing that what I truly love is being busy and productive. No amount of partying could ever meet the rush that comes with a packed schedule in which you work on autopilot. I earn and I get to spend and suddenly I feel like I’m my own man- or better yet, I feel like I’m overcoming limitations placed on women throughout history. I am the first girl from all my Sinhalese relatives living in Lanka to move out of my parents home- by choice and before marriage. I feel so proud because I feel like not only am I setting a precedent for other girls in the family who follow after me but I’m also living by my own rules. It’s a feeling of liberation that I can’t quite capture in so many words. It’s a thrill. The feeling of power and independence is always such a turn on- even if it’s about ourselves.
I also learned to value more important things in life and the brevity of human life and how so much of what we stress about truly means nothing in the grand scheme of things. From spending the middle part of the year stressing about the lack of a man and the hopeless attempts at finding someone through a dating app I evolved into spending the latter half of the year being grateful for things like movement and the ability to simply function. All it took was an autoimmune diagnosis, a few weeks of pain and limited movement and extreme hairfall before I realized that no man on this planet mattered more than my own abilities to function. My drive for independence meant that I needed to be able to function normally and on my own- suddenly that’s all I wanted. I valued the simple things- the things we take for granted. I learnt that there was so much God had already given me that I’d complained about and not looked after, and simply taken for granted. I learnt that I cherished those things and would fight as much as it took to retain them.
I learnt that I can actually live without my so-called best friends. I learnt that what I had for so long fooled myself into believing could be destroyed in a single relationship. That the trust I placed on people had been completely ill-fitting and that so often they can surprise you in ways that you don’t want to be surprised in. Dowaan proved to me how all that I had built him up to be as a friend was in no way what he was when it boiled down to it. When push came to shove he simply stood there agog- choosing a three month old “relationship” that started with cheating over a 10 year friendship that had been built on support and mutual understanding. And when I say choosing a 3 month old relationship- it didn’t really have a choice involved- simply a matter of standing up for his friend of ten years (his best friend) when his girlfriend at the time chose to take issue with his and my friendship. Better yet, it showed me who his girlfriend i.e: my best friend of 23 years, truly was. Apart from not trusting me, and trying to tear apart my friendship with Dowaan, it has since been revealed to me that she said some wonderfully “insightful” and completely false things about me to him during their courtship. What was truly the cherry on top was how at the end of that relationship and in the midst of the crisis in the one that followed, she still chose to call me and turn to me to be a shoulder to cry on despite all she had said. I feel like in learning and realising all this I’ve opened my third eye into the realities of the universe and the people in it. If I didn’t have much reason to trust humans, I have even less reasons now.
And the final lesson that came right at the cusp of the year drawing to an end, was to place more value and self respect on myself. A night of drinking and other shenanigans led to shameful sex with an old FWB in which neither him nor I were into it- thereby leading to a less than mediocre sexual experience that left me feeling more ashamed and in no way satisfied. I woke up feeling like I’d made my final big mistake for the year and it was all I needed to leave the bad habits that have held me back, in the year that was closing and take on the new year with better regard for myself. Sexual frustration should not be an excuse to shamelessly belittle myself, and going forward I hope to let my head make my decisions and not my libido. 
So much has happened to help me see more clearly than ever how much I need to watch out for myself, who my real friends are and what truly matters. This year was a great teacher. It taught me to love myself- not in the cringe-y Instagram influencer kinda way, but in the brutally honest, no-nonsense kind of way where I don’t let others walk all over me. And most importantly that I stop giving a fuck about people and incidents that don’t fulfill me, and choose instead to work on building my dream future for myself- because God knows, I deserve it!
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angry-geese · 3 years
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Nanami Kento x Reader
Warnings: sfw. pregnancy mention, death mention, minor injury mention. mild angst. jjk manga spoilers/shibuya arc spoilers
Summary: some pregnancy fluff with nanami
Word Count: 2.2k
jjk masterlist
Greys dot at his temples, and the sides of his beard. There's a permanent line between his eyebrows from scowling. Nanami always kept his face shaved in the past. Nowadays he hardly bothers shaving. You like it when he has a little bit of scruff, and he's often too tired to shave. His cheeks are far more gaunt. He lost a considerable amount of weight he never really gained back. You’ve been trying to get him to eat more. And it's working, but recovery isn't a short process. It was a long road that sometimes it feels like you take one step forward, only to take ten back.
He finds himself questioning if he'd rather wear a glass eye, or an eyepatch.
Nanami hardly sees the point in either. So the answer is neither. He rarely leaves his house, save for the rare times you drag him along to the grocery store, or down the street to the bakery. Even then, he wears his hat low on his head, keeping his eyes on the ground in a feeble attempt to make himself as small as possible.
Shibuya left scars on everyone who had the misfortune of being there, ones that never quite healed right. You were the same person; torn apart and put back together wrong. Age has not been kind to you, your wounds taking longer to heal, an ever-present ache in your bones. Past injuries have never quite healed, only laying dormant, waiting for the weather to sour so they can ache. He guesses he can consider himself lucky. He's alive. That's more than a lot of people can say.
But sometimes he thinks the real lucky ones were those who didn't survive.
Sometimes he thinks he's dead. In the twilight between sleep and his waking moments, he wonders if he actually made it. He wonders if he really survived, or if this is just some last ditch attempt by his brain to make sense of things.
He doesn't understand why you stay. He finds himself wondering why he bothers. Most days he doesn't see a point in continuing. But he doesn't want to leave you alone, reaching out to the empty space where he used to be.
For a long time he struggled to find purpose to all this. He wanted a reason, or at the very least answers. But he never would get them. It's unfair to say there’s an order to the universe. There's no reason why things happen the way they happen, they just do.
In the end he came to terms with it.
He remembers the glint in your eyes. A mischievous look- you were always trying to cause trouble. It's never really left. You were younger than him. Not by much. Two years. You were adamant he recommended you to become a grade one sorcerer. For months you pestered him, hounding him for that recommendation. As a Jujutsu High first-year, you looked up to him. When you got into trouble, you found yourself asking 'what would Nanami do?' And as time went on, you still did.
After months of pestering he eventually caved. You're nothing if not persistent. It was a little alarming at the time, and equally as irritating. But when you were finally a grade one sorcerer, he was there alongside you to celebrate.
At first glance, you two were far from compatible. The two of you couldn't be any more different. He was stoic and stern, and you were a known troublemaker. Your cursed technique worked well with his, and as a result, you went on many jobs together. As time went on you grew close.
And after years of working together, he finally realized he wanted more.
To everyone around you, your feelings were obvious. The two of you were hopeless. Between your stubbornness, and Nanami’s refusal to believe Gojo, neither of you wanted to be the first to confess. It was up to Gojo to help. Neither of you asked for his help, he took it upon himself. Little did he know, Nanami had a confession planned.
Nanami never got to have a proper confession. Gojo would spoil the surprise. Nanami was pissed, but your reaction was worth it. He doesn't think he’s ever seen you that happy.
Slowly things got better. Your more visible wounds healed and scarred. You went back to work. Nanami settled into domestic life better than he thought he would.
The transition wasn't the easiest. Settling down was far from an instantaneous change. He took on work around the house. For a short time you kept a ‘normal’ job. Even when you were younger, such work never suited you. Between the money you had saved up from your years as a sorcerer, and the money you got from odd jobs, you had enough to live comfortably. There was no need to work.
Slowly he started to look forward to getting up in the morning. Having a routine helped. It gave him a sense of normalcy.
He often finds himself unable to sleep. Nanami falls asleep late in the afternoon, and sleeps until either his phone, or a nightmare rouses him.
Today it's neither. He was a light sleeper before. Now even more-so. When he’s next to you, sleep comes to him easier. His arms find the swell of your belly, wrapping around it protectively. Your presence is a reminder that you’re still around, that you're not going anywhere. His shoulder aches. He finds sleep impossible. He’s too sore to move, but too sore to sleep. Even before everything, he found it easy to sleep on his couch, and hard to sleep in bed. You’d constantly pester him that sleeping on the couch wasn't good for his back. But that wouldn't stop you from staying there until you both inevitably fell asleep, and he carried you to bed.
It took you years to convince him to have one. He wanted to settle down and have children, but he couldn't be both a sorcerer and a parent. And neither could you. Shibuya only set things back. The world had to heal first. Things had to get better. The two of you had to heal before others could rely on you.
You weren't actively trying, but if it happened, it happened.
You've long since fallen asleep in the crook of his neck. He hardly left bed all day. Things were getting bad again. Sometimes months would go by where it seemed things were improving, only for them to take a nosedive. He’s still getting better, but recovery isn't a linear process. You didn't have anywhere to go that day, so you stayed right by his side. You took it upon yourself to make him feel better. Or at least bother him until he got out of bed. Much of your morning was spent watching movies on your phone, and stealing blankets from each other.
Retirement was nice. Granted, you retired rather young, but if the rest of your life was spent with him, you’d be content. He’s still the same man you fell in love with all those years ago. Aside from the occasional, safe-ish odd job, you were done with sorcery. Those days were past you.
He’s grown tired of staying still. Sometimes moving helps the aches. He never was the earliest riser before, but now he can hardly stay in bed past seven. Everything hurts. No matter when he goes to sleep, he’s usually up by 7:30, and you can count on him making coffee in the kitchen.
It's hardly past nine. The sun has completely set over the horizon. Stiffness has set into his limbs. He takes great care to not disturb your sleeping form, tucking the blankets back around you.
You nuzzle into the warm spot where he once was, a frown burned into your face. You never liked sleeping without him. Nightmares struck you frequently. Often you'd wake up from a dead sleep in a panic, calling out for him, convinced that this was some sick dream and he died years ago. He’d often wake up to you clinging to his arm, face buried in his shirt.
But he was always there.
You find it easier to fall asleep when it's light out. You don't like falling asleep in the dark. He makes sure to keep a light on in the hall. The power bill you could care less about. Nightmares came to you in the dark. Your logic is that, if there's no dark, you won't have them. To some extent it works.
It's a bit late for dinner, but he finds himself in the kitchen anyway. He wants udon, but the shop you normally go to would be closed at this hour. Their mushroom udon is the best. He’ll try to recreate it.
He sets some water on to boil, along with some frozen gyoza to thaw that you always insist on going to this one specific market in Tokyo for. Chicken and leek, with lots of ginger. Your favorite. You go through so much of the stuff that you have to get it in bulk, and freeze the extras. He thinks you’ll want tea too, so he sets the kettle on to boil.
He doesn't hear you walk in. Between the clanking of pots, and the whistling of the kettle, your soft footsteps go unheard. Nanami’s hearing was never quite the same. But he senses eyes on his back, and turns.
“I didn't mean to wake you, love.” He says.
“You didn't. I was having a hard time staying asleep anyway,” you say, “what’re you making?”
“Mushroom udon and gyoza,” he says, “it’s gonna be kind of a late dinner, but I thought it sounded good.”
“Smells good,” you say.
One of his hands finds your much smaller ones. Your fingers lace with his. His hands are warm, and calloused from years of using his weapon.
“Remind me to get more tea when I head into town tomorrow,” you say, “oh- and rice too. We were getting low the last time I checked. Do you want to go too?”
He nods. He makes a silent note to add those, along with laundry soap to the shopping list.
Before, he hated going into town. Strangers poked and prodded, and asked about his scars. It's gotten better as time goes on. If cravings struck you in the middle of the night, he would be up and ready to bring you something. Craving the mochi only sold by a specific shop in Tokyo? It doesn't matter if he had to take the train all the way to the city, he’d do it. Your arms wrap around his waist from behind. He’s a bit too tall for you to rest your head on his shoulder from behind. You have to stand on the tips of your toes to press a kiss to his cheek. He smells faintly of laundry soap, and shampoo. His stubble brushes against your lips. You always liked when he grew it out.
He pulls you so you stand in front of him, your back against his chest. His hands find the swell of your belly, wrapping around you protectively. Nanami plants a kiss on the top of your head. It's one of the few moments you feel truly normal. You’re no longer sorcerers, but a couple sharing a romantic moment, one building a life together.
He’s hardly allowed any distance between you two. Nanami acts like you’re made out of glass. He’s almost afraid to touch you. God forbid you try to lift something too heavy, or help out with the housework. He’s on you in an instant, trying to get you to rest. He’s a bit overbearing when it comes to things that aren't good for the baby. No alcohol, no caffeine, no overexerting yourself. You didn't miss alcohol all that much, but you really miss coffee. At times his presence can be suffocating. He means well, even if it gets on your nerves.
When the noodles are done, he gathers two bowls- part of a set given to you as a wedding gift. You only brought them out to use when your parents would visit. Much of the time they spent gathering dust. You always talked about using them more, but never got the opportunity to. He figures now is as good a time as ever. You set the table, setting out a few candles. He’d break out a bottle of sake if you could drink, but you just settle for tea.
"Retirement looks good on you," you say.
“It looks good on you too,” he says.
Conversation carries on while you eat. The topic falls onto mundane things that make his heart flutter only when you talk about them. You make plans to go shopping in the morning. You need groceries, and there’s a new shop opening up in town that you want to check out. When you’re done eating, you help him clean up. You clear the table while he gets the dishes.
He’s finally found his place. Not in jujutsu or human society. Not among sorcerers or regular people. His place is beside you.
And each day, he finds himself falling more hopelessly in love.
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sanzu-sanzu-sanzu · 3 years
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songs about toxic people 7*
Sanzu Haruchiyo X Reader
Summary: In which you are Bonten’s No. 2 and Sanzu is No. 3. Almost ten years of being stuck working together means you’re both bound to pick up on each other’s idiosyncrasies, yeah?
*IMPORTANT NOTE: this is more like an interlude/bonus chapter actually centering more on misc bonten x reader Gen! interactions. it still ties in with the whole story, it’s just there’s less to zero sanzu in this one cus the focus will be more on the other bonten haha, so if you’re here exclusively for sanzu x reader, you may skip this if you like! 😬  
it’s just i got these headcanons that idk what to do with and also they are somewhat short 😭
chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6
chapter 7: We may not be a perfect family but we love each other (until we don’t) - koko
.
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Koko thinks of cats when he thinks of you; partly from the circumstances of your first meeting, partly ‘cause of the way you sort of simply glide in and out of rooms quietly with the stealth and fluidity of one.
(Although Sanzu had insisted he thought more of ghosts and wraiths, a comment which Koko only made light of even though he wasn’t wrong.)
She even kinda fights like a feline, he’d told Inupi one time all those years ago, as he thought of the way your lithe and minimal movements were always able to take bigger guys down along with the quiet ferocity to match.
Maybe she learns from all the cats back in the shrine, Inupi responded—a joke, essentially, in his own terms. Koko suppressed a smile: cat and dog, you and her, maybe that’s why you two get along so well went his own, sad attempt at humor, because you and your second-in-command were obviously very close and very unlike cats and dogs. The joke, however, sadly did not seem to land, and Inupi’s forehead only creased, his expression dumbfounded.
That’s not how it works.
Koko never forgets the day you were first introduced by Mikey. It’s at the back of Toman’s abandoned shrine, at the edge of the thick forest surrounding the area, that their new leader had said they’ll be meeting Black Dragon’s temporary captain. He never specified what anyone would be doing in the forest at this hour in the afternoon, and neither him nor Inupi had asked, but then there you were: in your bare feet and in your school uniform, attempting to move a big pot of plant from one spot of land to another, your expression almost annoyed. (At the pot, most likely, which did not seem to budge.)
Mikey called your attention still a few meters afar:
“Hey. Whatcha up to—”
in a tone that very clearly did not seem to intend to place whatever you were up to above this particular Toman business at the moment, so really, it would not have made any difference whether you answered or not. Which you didn’t, only glancing at your president once—not with the angry expression, at least—before continuing with your ordeal.
The pot nudged just a tiny bit.
Only when Mikey finally stopped right in front of you and you noticed Koko’s and Inupi’s figures behind him did you finally stand straight, looking at Mikey quizzically. “What’s up?” Quick nods to Inupi and him. “Hello.”
Mikey briefly introduced all of you and proceeded to explain that you were to be formally placed as the Black Dragon’s new captain today, to which your eyes slightly widened.
“Oh, I thought you said tomorrow.”
Mikey hesitated at first but then shrugged. “Hm, they came here already today so I thought might as well. Come on, it’ll be quick.”
You narrowed your eyes at him and then to his two quiet companions but then so agreed anyway, and as Mikey ushered you in front nobody else aside from Koko seemed to notice your lack of shoes. You’d only taken a few steps ahead when you tugged at the sleeve of Mikey’s coat, making him pause.
“I don’t have my Toman jacket,” which was obvious but was not what Koko was expecting for you to say, if he were to be honest.
Mikey looked at you blankly. “Well, where is it?”
“Well, something happened to it,” was your only vague response, but then you turned your head to where you just came from making all three boys follow suit. On a wooden bench slightly obscured by the plants were a family of cats consisting of a mother and her kittens, all sleeping peacefully in a cozy pile on top of your balled up Toman jacket.
“Oh. Okay.” Mikey only nodded like he completely understood. Without thinking about it twice, Sano Manjiro, Tokyo Manji gang’s No. 1—feared around the streets of Tokyo, bowed to no one and stepped over everyone—took off his billowing Toman coat and draped it over your shoulders. “Here, you can borrow mine,” he simply said. “I mean, you gotta look the part.”
Your mouth stretched into a grin.
Beside him, Inupi gave Koko a quick, wordless glance accompanied by that tiny, upward curve on the corner of his mouth that anyone else could’ve missed. Inupi rarely smiled at anything anymore those days—perhaps one of the reasons why this singular, initial meeting had stuck in his mind all these years. It’s one of those memories Koko always thought he could probably live without, occupying a quiet little corner in his mind which, frankly, a much more practical or life-changing memory could have occupied, if it were up to him. But then there you were with your cats and your air of schoolgirl abandon making Inupi smile, an information that he simply didn’t know what to do about.
“Alright, boss. But please, no speeches.”
This made Mikey laugh. “Can’t promise you that, I’m sorry.” It’s only after a few more steps that Mikey did finally notice your bare feet.
“Where the hell are your shoes?”
“Oh, they got wet,” you quietly said. “I was playing with the cats…” and three pairs of eyes stared at you like it wasn’t enough of an answer. “With a hose. Manjiro, I was watering the plants.”
And so you stood atop the shrine steps while addressing the men from Black Dragons, your feet bare and covered in scratches and the Toman president’s much bigger coat over your shoulders. Nobody questioned the absence of shoes—at least not out loud—not with your leader Manjiro right by your side, in his flip flops holding a half-eaten taiyaki in one hand.
The memory comes unannounced in snips and pieces some years later as another Bonten meeting ends. There’s various movements around the table by now, but then Koko catches your undivided staring as you sat across from him, your chin propped up against one hand. He ignores you for a short while as he fixes his things, until he finally decides to look up.
“Anything wrong?”
You suddenly purse your lips in a small smile amidst the gloomy and rigid air of mid-morning Monday meetings and for a moment, it’s as if Koko is thinking of another memory.
“I just realized you kinda look like my Mr. Kaku,” is all you say. The little remark makes not-your Kakucho look up from the document he’s reading without really turning his head, while Rindou who is seated beside you squints—in curiosity or amusement, Koko can’t tell. From his own right side, Takeomi is slowly angling his head as if meaning to take a better look at Koko behind his curtain of silver hair.
Mr. Kaku, of course, is your pet cat, the one with the smooth silver fur that you’d rescued from an abandoned site during an out-of-town business trip some months ago. You and your unimaginative pet naming sense landed on “Mr. Kaku,” in honor of your then-partner Kakucho who had volunteered to keep the cat inside his bag thru the doors of the hotel that didn’t allow pets. But he looks nothing like Kaku, Manjiro had quipped, earning a few grunts of approval from your ever-biased circle, but you couldn’t have been bothered so you stuck with the name.
Koko is quick to decipher that in your-speak, cat comparisons are more or less compliments and never a form of insult—not that in your mid-20s, you all haven’t already gotten above petty verbal affronts, after all. So he humors you, eyes now back to his things but with his attention still on the matter at hand. “What, is it the hair?”
“Yeah, it’s the hair,” Rindou says before you can answer, his head lolling lazily on one shoulder. “Can’t believe no one had noticed before.”
“And the eyes,” you simply nod. “They both got these nice, sharp eyes.”
Would you have named him Mr. Koko if you thought he resembled Kokonoi before? is the one lingering question that none of the men around you bother to ask.
It’s only a couple of weeks later, after another Bonten meeting, when Koko hands you a souvenir from his weekend business trip: a red cat collar with a customized pendant, a tiny enamel engraving of your Bonten tattoo. The pendant is black on one side and gold on the other, and the small gasp you let out makes every head in the room turn—the almost unfamiliar, genuine sound of delight thawing the usual morning’s stern atmosphere.
“There’s a shop right across the hotel where they make rush engravings like that.” Koko is saying casually like it’s no big deal, but he sees the expression on your face and he can’t help but grin. “Thought Mr. Kaku might like it.”
Your eyes perk up at the mention of ‘Mr. Kaku’ like Koko is the first person to ever acknowledge that Mr. Kaku doesn’t need to be named anything else apart from ‘Mr. Kaku.’ “Oh, it’s perfect, Koko. I’ll send you pictures once I make him wear it,” you say, your attention instantly back to your hands, choosing to ignore his ‘I think just one picture might be enough.’
From the other end of the room, Sanzu is making his way towards the door. “Congratulations,” he smirks as he passes by behind you, quirking one eyebrow up at Koko. “Now she won’t be shutting up about it all weekend,” because Sanzu will be spending the next three days with you over in another city to conduct business with another drug scion, of course.
Across the table, Kakucho only sighs before shaking his head. “I still wish you could’ve picked a better name for your cat,” he says—a valid complaint, Koko thinks bemusedly, now that your own Mr. Kaku looks more like a feline version of himself.
chapter 8 >
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this one goes out to my closest friends the ones who make me feel less alien
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152 notes · View notes
fwkei · 3 years
Text
Time.
Kazutora x fem!reader (angst/fluff)
CW/TW: Mentions of suicide, (slight) mention of starvation.
MAJOR SPOILERS FOR VALHALLA ARC
Note! Explanation of story at end just incase you’re confused also i apologize for mistakes, i did not read this over. 🙆🏻‍♀️
WC: 3.4k
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You sat at the edge of your seat. Watching the clock above your teacher's head ever so closely. 
“When you want to find the common di-” 
Suddenly the bell rang, interrupting your teacher from his final words. 
“Oh my bad, guess I lost track of time, anyways please remember to study for your quiz on Monday! I know it's a weekend, but save some time for academics!” said your teacher as your classmates packed up their stuff to leave. 
Today was Friday, meaning it was the day you get to visit Kazutora at juvie for the first time after Keisuke's death, and your attempt. It was 3:30, and visiting hours started at 4 to 5 every Friday for inmates. Running to the metro takes about 5-7 minutes, and walking from the station to the actual juvie takes about 20 minutes, while the ride lasts up to 10, meaning you should arrive there at around 4:10. And there's no time to waste. 
You ran out of class, ignoring your fellow classmates goodbyes. You held your book bag tight as you ran fast to the Tokyo station. Seeing you arrived just on time you jumped in just before the 3:30 o'clock train leaves to a different side of the district where Kazutora is being held. You held onto the rail beside you to keep yourself steady as the train started to move . 
You felt scared but happy to see Kazutora. He most probably didn't know you would be coming, he probably thought you would at most write letters to him, like before, but again...Kazutora believes that you hate him now. You didn't know what you were going to say to him. Draken told you that he already visited him while you were in psychiatric hold for a bit, and he told you that Kazutora was planning on killing himself. Draken did not specify if he told Kazutora about your own attempt but you didn't worry too much because you were healing, and you now had hope.  
Your heart was racing, as the train came to a stop. As the doors opened you ran, and fast. Dodging people to not hurt them and almost stepping on things you shouldn’t be stepping on. You checked the time to see it was 4:01, and you still had about 10 minutes worth of walking/running to cover. 
You were breathing heavily when the Juvenile building came into view. You checked the time again to see it was 4:11. You jogged to the doors of the building despite the fact that your thighs were burning from the amount of cardio you had just done. 
It's all worth it. 
You thought to yourself opening the doors. 
Kazutora sat on the bed of his bland and colorless cell. He signed as he looked up at the ceiling light before turning his position to look at the side of the wall. He held his pillow tight. He knew it was visiting day, and his heart was anxious despite the fact that others had already been called to see their visitors, and there was still no call for him. He didn't even expect any visitors.
Kazutora didn't know if he wanted to see you or not. He’s spent so much time alone in his cell thinking. He wondered if you had figured out the other reason for him stabbing his best friend, you could read people, but he knew you had a hard time reading him. He felt his heart ache. He was scared of the karma that would hit him because of it. Maybe not even Karma, but just some sort of punishment, for causing pain to the soul that cared for him so much, and for not being there for that soul when she needed it the most. Which... ultimately lead to your attempt, which Draken told him about during his visit. He shut his eyes as he remembered Draken's words. 
“I don’t wanna hear you say there is no point anymore. Because there is, and it’s kinda frustrating and irritating how you can’t see it even though it’s right there. She’s in psychiatric hold right now because she was close to ending her own life. After Baji died, and you were taken away, Y/n couldn't take it anymore, and no one could see it because she just...she just kept it in, like you do. She was going to die on Baji’s birthday if I wasn’t there to make her throw up the pills she took. Her and I may not be blood related siblings, but I know she’s been through a lot and has always gotten over it just fine, you know that...but this time...I got really fucking scared.”
Kazutora felt his heart drop to fucking hell at Draken’s words. He felt his breathing stop as his mouth parted.
“I know you love her, I'm not sure in what way but I could care less about that. I know, Kazutora. All those times you came crying to the brothel, crying into her arms, begging for some type of help and she helped you, lended you her body for you to cry on, I’d hear all of it. I know you’re hurting, but if you go, I don't think she will be able to live with herself. She’ll blame herself for not being there for you like she’s always been. Do you understand?”
He felt his body throb from literal physical pain. Kazutora was feeling and getting the punishment he deserved right then and there. 
“You owe it to her, whether you like it or not, to stay alive because she's doing the same for you. And once you’re out of here, you should finally grow up. Let her cry into your arms for once. She’s your best friend, right? Because she deserves for those efforts to be reciprocated. And you deserve to see what she’s gone through because of everything that happened. Take care, Kazutora.” 
Kazutora was lost in his own mind, to the point where he couldn't even register that one of the guards was calling his name from the cell door.
“Hm? I’m sorry I wasn't...uh, paying attention. What did you say?” he asked sitting up nervously 
“You got a visitor, kid. C’mon get up.” said the man unlocking his cell 
“A- visitor?” he said quietly getting up from his bed with shocked eyes 
It was already 4:15. Kazutora grew anxious at who his visitor could be. He was sure it wasn't you, your school is too far for you to make it here in time. There would only be a couple minutes to spare if you did try. Could it be Draken wanting to give him a word of advice? Or maybe Chifuyu.. Maybe Mikey? God, who could it be. It made him feel even more congested and trapped than before.  
As Kazutora walked, he looked down at his feet avoiding people's gazes. He saw the backs of his fellow juvenile delinquents from the side of his eye. His heartbeat became stronger, and he felt it thumbing in his ears. God, he didn't know what to expect. He was just so...frustrated. 
“Here, you have until 5.” said the guard, taking off his hand cuffs. His back was facing you. You grew anxious bringing your hands to rest on your things and skirt, waiting for him to turn around and look at you. You watched as he rubbed his wrists and sat down at the stool still not looking at you. You rubbed your hands together under the table separating you both, as the guard walked away to patrol. Your eyes followed the guard, not even noticing that Kazutora had turned to look at your face. 
Kazutora felt his face get hot at the sight of you. You had a school shirt on, with a dark blue tie and a sweater vest, Your hair tied into a low and messy bun with some of you natural and dyed hairs falling out framing your face. He felt his whole body go warm as you turned your head and gave him a nervous smile as a small blush formed. He didn't know why he was scared to see you, because every time Kazutora had the chance to see you, he instantly felt better, no matter what.
You two, and the other inmates and visitors, were all separated by a piece of plastic with a vent to capture sound better. On the side there was a subsection with an opening to the other side where you could pass things through. Such as notes, toys, hygiene stuff, and extra. You brought your hands to the table holding them.
“Hey...sorry I’m late.” you said as you saw Kazutora snap out of his gaze 
“Oh no I-, please don’t be..” he said waving his hands frantically, clearly nervous
“I had to run about 2 miles to get here..” you laughed trying to not tense up
Kazutora felt… stupid, why would you do that? Just to see him? It just made him even more confused...confused about how he felt towards you. 
“Just to see me? But..why?” he asked without thinking and just speaking, giving a regretful and embarrassed face after asking his question.
“Hm? Oh well it's simple really…” you said bringing your hands to rest in between your thighs on your seat 
“I know that I've told you that I don't like saying these words to people because it sounds like some sort of goodbye but it’s time I grow up from my past, and stop keeping things in..so…it’s because I love you... I thought that was fairly obvious but I don't wanna mess up like I did last time. I want you to know that I do love you and care for you.” you said giving him a closed eyed smile, this made Kazutora realize that you deeply regretted not telling Keisuke that you loved him more often when you two still had time. He felt his heart ache. He felt so guilty and gross.
“So, I’m gonna try and start saying that more often..” you said laughing to break the silence 
Kazutora was still speechless at what you had just said. He couldn’t seem to process it, and he wanted to say it back but for some reason he just couldn’t. He was afraid that something else might slip out. He truly didn't think he was worthy of your love and care. It became quiet. Again.
“I made you a bento box with your favorite things, I made sure to put some extra meat. Cause you always used to ask for that when I would make bentos for study days with you and Keisuke. And don’t worry! It’s allowed and you can have the kitchen hold it for you till you’re ready to eat it for today's dinner, the guards said so. And the container is microwave safe! So you can warm up the entree section. There’s rice and BBQ meat, little octopus shaped sausages and sauce with it! Oh and a salad with sesame dressing on the side, and desert which is just mochi. Every Friday I'll come by, and give you the new bento and you'll just give me back the old one, so that I can wash it and so we don't have to waste stuff.” you said smiling 
Your hand dung into your bag, and you pulled out a wooden bento box sliding it halfway through the subsection, but Kazutora hung his head low. You smiled, trying your best to make things right, as silence grew loud again. 
“I can also bring some mangas for you, I know you like shounen and also horror.. So I can buy some and give them to you so that you aren't bored! This week's shonen jump is good… It’s about a boy who is trying to save his mom, and ends up traveling across lands, with close friends, to get this special potion that will heal her, but I’ll make sure to look for some good horror manga too...I know you like stuff about folk tales, that sound okay?”  
Silence.
After a few minutes you spoke again.
“I decided to let my hair grow out cause I kinda miss having longer hair…There's this really pretty girl in my class who has long blonde hair.. Like Emma’s but longer and more wavy.. What about you? Anything you wanna do to your hair when you get out? I’ll take you to get it done-” 
Silence. 
The time now at 4:40. Kazutora bit his lip out of frustration, refusing to look up at you. 
“Oh! What about I bring over a sudoku book, so you can work on your academics as well! I can teach you how to play, it’s fun once you get the hang of it. Or I can bring just a simple literature book, it’s really up to you, I think both are great.” 
Silence. 
“Maybe markers so you can draw on yourself when you’re bored? I remember you doing that while I would tutor you and Keisuke. I can get big and small ones, and ones with different colors too. Also a sketch book, since you’re really good at drawing.” 
You were met with silence again. You felt your heart ache. Your eyes looked up at the clock and saw it was 4:47. You both were running out of time. About half an hour went by of your speaking, you giving a couple minutes in between waiting for him to speak back, but nothing. You clenched your hands into fists, biting your bottom lip as you looked down at your hands, resting on your thighs. 
You felt a strong feeling in your throat, the feeling you get when you’re about to sob. You were so frustrated, and you were trying to keep a level head. It was hard and you just wanted to fucking cry. 
“I- '' you said before closing your mouth realizing you were about to let out a whine. You didn't wanna cry, you wanted to say something but you were afraid that if you did, it would just come out as a sob.  
“I know it’s hard on you-” you said holding back your sobs while still looking down at your hands, letting your hairs cover your face 
“If you don’t want me here, I promise- that I’m fine with that...but~” you said in between pauses keeping your sobs in, but your last word came out shaky making Kazutora shoot his head to see you about to cry. 
He felt his heart ache once again. 
 “But please….jus-just say something. Anything. At least acknowledge that I'm here.” you cried quietly while tensing up your shoulders 
Kazutora frowned. This was his punishment. Seeing you cry, and not being able to hold and comfort you like he desperately wanted to. He opened his mouth, but closed it soon after when nothing came out. Not even a squeak, or whine, or breath. 
“I-”
You heard him say. You looked up with tears in your eyes seeing his face of desperation. 
Kazutora wanted to speak so badly, there were so many thoughts in his head he just could not push one out of his mouth, and he was afraid he might say something he would regret. He wanted to respond to everything you asked him, add commentary, tell you that you looked pretty today, say thank you for the food you made him. Tell you to not waste your tears on someone like him. Say sorry for making you feel uncomfortable because of his silence. God he just- 
“I love you-” he choked up and said in a louder tone causing your eyes to widen and mouth to part from shock at his sudden outburst.
He was avoiding your eyes as he spoke. 
“I- thank you, thank you so much for the food! Really! And I would really love whatever and everything you bring me.” he said, quieting down towards the end.  
“I...can’t put my thoughts into words… and I don’t wanna say something I’d regret. All this time I’ve just been lost in my own mind. I just want you to know that..that I really am in- that I really appreciate you. I want you..to be here, and I’m so...sorry for making you cry.” he said in between pauses of frustration and embarrassment 
You felt your body get warm, your heart beat was strong and you could feel it in your finger tips and temples. You opened your mouth to say something before Kazutora spoke again. 
“I..wanted to.. Wanted to help you...in just some way...after seeing you cry for the first time...with Baji in your arms….I shouldn't have stabbed Baji...I took the person you loved more than anything...away from you.. Because I was j- because I was so stupid, and still am. Even when you’ve done...so fucking much for me...I- and I took him from you...I just don’t get it… how can you have any empathy towards me anymore.. It doesn't make sense. I took so much from you… I killed Shinchiro, and I killed Baji. You loved them both...Mikey loved them both, why do..why do you even have any feeling towards me?” he said looking into your eyes with tears   
Your eyes softened at him. You took a small breath before saying-
“I thought I already told you why, Kazutora. I love you.” 
Kazutora felt a tear run down his cheek. He knew how much thought came behind those simple words. 
“I don’t need a reason to love you. Just like I don't need a reason to be hungry. It’s just there, and will continue to be there, you know what I mean? Same thing with everyone I love.” you said 
His breath hitched. The time now at 4:52.
“The only difference is I was in love with Keisuke. I still am in love with him. Even though he’s not here anymore. I know you might think I love him and Shinchiro and Mikey because they saved my life and helped me. But I was only so little. I had no concept of it. So was Keisuke. So was Mikey. Keisuke had no reason to come up to little me while I was starving on the ground practically dying. He just did it. He was too young to understand love. You think he understood his feelings for me the second he saw me? Or even with Mikey or Shinchiro. Of course not. They were just focussed on saving my life at the time. We discovered the love that was involved later. Even if it was too late to say anything about it. It took Kei and I about...hmmm..5-7 years maybe...to understand what we felt toward each other specifically. It is different with everyone. The love is just there, it’ll just be understood when the time is right. Like when your hunger just hits you. So when you ask me why I love you, or care for you, or forgive you. I just can’t give you a simple answer, even if I wanted to….because there's so much. Too much.” 
Kazutora understood your words. He really did. It made so much sense to him and he just wanted to scream.
Why? Well.. 
“The time will come where you believe that you're worthy of someone else's love and even your own, and even worth loving someone else yourself. So don’t worry. I’ll wait. I’ll wait as long as it takes. Even if it takes all the time in the world, okay?” you said smiling at him leaving him with shocked eyes
“Alright times up! 5 o'clock!” yelled a guard 
“Well, I'll see you next Friday, okay? I’ll bring over some manga, oh! And don't forget the bento!” you said getting up from your seat as Kazutora did the same keeping his hands on the table as the guard came to cuff them 
“Y/n I-I’m…”
No. He can’t say it. He can never ever say it. Why? And say what? 
Because he will never be him. He can never be like him for you, and he was perfect for you. He was the one there for you. He had the time to love you. He was the one. He could never even compete. Not after what he did. Not after the jealousy and envy grew and brewed inside him towards him. He is filthy. Not worthy of your love. Right? 
But someday, he desperately and genuinely wants to allow himself to be loved, and to love. Kazutora will forever be longing for that moment. And when he can love, and allow himself to be loved, he wants it to be with you. 
But till that time comes..
“I’ll...really be looking forward to it.” he said biting back his words and smiling softly 
“Likewise.” you said smiling as you both parted your ways, at least for the time being. 
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Explanation/note: when i wrote this, i made y/n be a ‘foster’ siblings with Draken and childhood friends with Mikey and Keisuke. << Reason being is because i gave her a backstory where she was neglected and ran away, hence her having a more naturing personality. Y/n and Keisuke were a couple till he died but Kazutora always loved Y/n so it’s a love triangle in a way? I don’t know, but Kazutora grew envious of Keisuke in this ff which ended up being a motive to stabbing him during the fight, to which he later regrets and gets punishment for. Y/n in the story doesn’t know that so that’s why Kazutora can’t accept her love for real because he doesn't know if Y/n will really forgive him after that, and Kazutora won’t be able to learn/accept love till he admits what he did. Holding in that secret, and being in love with Y/n makes him feel frustrated and act out. And obviously time is the theme of this whole story. Kazutora at the end decided to avoid his feelings because the way things are going right now fro the time being for him are fine because he doesn't believe he deserves anything more.  But that can only last for so long, so he’s gambling with his relationship with you. He thinks of it as his punishment for now, not being able to tell you how he really feels, and not being able to comfort you.
ANYWAYS hope you liked it, sorry if it’s confusing. 
184 notes · View notes
shokami · 3 years
Text
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featuring tsukishima, kenma, oikawa, and semi
genre fluff
word count 1.7k
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tsukishima kei
if anyone were to be asked “do you think tsukishima likes to cuddle?” their answer would most definitely be no. which is false.
although he will always tease you about it first and foremost, he secretly enjoys his cuddling time with you.
the teasing has to happen, because it is almost always you who’s trying to initiate the cuddling first.
tsukki thinks that if he were to try to cuddle with literally anyone else, he would hate it. it isn’t because he’s not a people person, but because he’s only ever really cuddled with you. so he’s accustomed to the way you cuddle.
cuddling usually starts when you’re both in the middle of your movie binging, and you’ll be all wrapped up in blankets and eating snacks.
you always curl up underneath his arm, and cuddle into his side— or try to find a way to weasel your way into his lap.
your attempts at trying to get as physically close to him as possible, never fail to amuse him. he scoffs at your effort, and repositions you in a way that’s more comfortable for the two of you.
when it comes to finally sleeping, you’re still cuddled underneath his arm but he’ll pull you in more so that you can lay on his chest and entangle yourself with him.
you’re definitely a mess of limbs together.
slowly peaking your eyes open, you squinted at the absurdly bright rays of light that shined through the curtains. that was your que to finally get out of bed, and start your day.
against what tsukishima would have wanted, had he been awake— you decided to try and squirm your way out from under his grasp. you knew he hated that you were an early bird, he detests that about you everyday and he isn’t afraid to tell you.
as you attempted to wiggle out of the bed, you knew there was no way for you to escape his hold on you without waking him up. always unfortunate for you, considering he was a very grumpy morning person.
you could always smooth it over with a few good morning kisses though, he seemed to enjoy those.
just as you thought you could make it, you were almost out of arm's reach when the familiar cold fingers grasped around your wrist and pulled you back down on top of him. “where do you think you’re going?”
“i wanna go shower, tsukki.” you groaned, already hearing the annoyance in his voice before even seeing his expression. “you could always get your lazy butt up, and come with.”
he groaned, tossing you to the side and pulling you into his chest in a new position. “why can’t we ever sleep in? you have an annoying sleeping pattern.”
“it’s not annoying! you just want to sleep in until 10, every weekend. we lose time like that.”
“yeah, obviously. that’s how time works.”
“tsukishima kei.”
“shut up. go back to sleep, and you can be cute later.”
another sigh, and you relaxed against tsukishima and the pillows once more. there was no use in trying to defy his need to sleep in, you wouldn’t win.
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kozume kenma
the two of you are always cuddling, there is no doubt about that. not one bit.
if you aren’t cuddling, you’re still finding a way to be physically touching. touch starvation is very real, and you probably both have it.
when it comes to actually cuddling though, kenma prefers to either be the little spoon or be laying between your legs / on your stomach.
it’s actually your preferred way of sleeping too, as you’re both usually on your phones, or kenma is playing a game that you’re not really paying attention to.
you absentmindedly run your fingers through his hair, scrolling through one of your social media apps, and without realizing it he’s drifted off to sleep with his arm wrapped around your waist and his head tucked into your stomach.
this is the comfiest sleeping position, but if either of you tosses and turns in your sleep it’s likely that the direct cuddling will stop.
but, the two of you will still have physical contact. kenma will either hold your hand from the opposite side of the bed, or you’ll still be close enough that your leg is brushing against his underneath the pile of blankets.
eventually though, you’ll probably roll over behind him and koala yourself against his back before repeating the cycle of tossing and turning again.
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.
“kenma make it stop.” you pulled the blanket up over your head, cursing the alarm.
he made no noise, or movement— sleeping through the sound as if the room was silent.
you didn’t know why either of you ever had it set, it wasn’t like the two of you ever woke up at a decent hour. especially not when the god awful sound of it started screaming at you. it was always shut off, and tossed to the side. you made a mental note to tell kenma that you should just throw it out.
“KENMA! ALARM. OFF.”
finally snapping out of his sleep, he sat up startled by the noise of the alarm and your irritated sleepy voice. quickly slapping at the alarm on the nightstand, he silenced the beeping. climbing underneath the blankets to get closer to you in the dark room, you offered him a tired smile.
it was going to be another one of those days, where you continue to convince each other to sleep in just a little longer each hour. the previous nights antics, of screaming at the television screen at the new game you both decided to play, you were both overly exhausted and craved sleep. again.
“what time did the clock say?” you asked, pecking a kiss to his nose.
“11:30 a.m,” he closed his eyes once more, snuggling into you. “wanna sleep in longer?”
“i thought you’d never ask, kenken.”
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oikawa tooru
he is almost always the big spoon. he loves how you fit into his arms, and feeling like he can protect you from the world.
it definitely gives him a certain type of satisfaction that he never really knew he needed, until he got to cuddle in bed with you for the first time.
oikawa being the big spoon helps him feel needed. which is something that he needs a lot of constantly, honestly.
however, there are times when you get to be the big spoon.
these times come after he’s had long tiresome practices, particularly hard days, or after losing a match.
more often than not, you end up in this sleeping position because he asked, or you came into the bedroom after he was already dozing off.
either way, you will always gladly oblige and climb into bed after him.
you always make sure to play with his hair, by softly brushing it away from his face
you were enjoying the body heat that was radiating off of oikawa, the warmth spread through you in the most comforting way. your internal clock could sense that the sun was rising, and ultimately you knew what came with that. that didn’t stop your unconscious mind hoping for the opposite though. you knew oikawa had already had a rough practice the day before, and you wanted nothing more than to keep him in your arms and rest for the morning.
that fantasy was quickly shattered.
the weight of the bed began to shift, and your arms were slowly unwrapped from his torso. attempting his move from the bed, you decided to take matters into your own hands. with ease, you softly grasped the back of his t-shirt and pulled him back down to the surface.
a surprised groan, followed by soft laughter; oikawa stared down at you as if you were a sleepy child. “angel face, i have to get ready for practice.”
“no, just a little while longer… please?” you pleaded, pulling the best performance with your pouty face.
with a soft kiss, oikawa collapsed fully into your arms once more. “20 minutes,” he told you sternly.
an hour passed by, and he was still in bed with you. he just can’t say no to that face. he hates the way you pout, and use it against him.
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semi eita
if he wants to cuddle, you better be prepared for him to be grumpy about it.
he doesn’t know how to directly ask you for cuddles without being awkward, or sound demanding.
usually, he’ll just lay beside you and give you very indirect gestures that he assumes you’ll know mean that it’s affection time. ( you've picked up on the indirect hints he gives you.)
it’s very rare that semi will cuddle in any position that doesn’t involve him on top of you.
similar to kenma, he will lay between your legs with his chin resting on your stomach or your chest and just hold you like that.
he is also a very touchy cuddler, meaning he will rub your thigh, your sides, and play with your hair. whatever he can touch, he will. his love language is heavily dependent on touch.
when you’re finally falling asleep wrapped up in one another, he will most likely find a comfy position to lay with his head still on your chest.
we call this position the cradle.
the moment you began to stir, you could tell you were alone in bed. you were no longer intertwined with semi, but you could hear the distant noises of rustling around in the kitchen.
it wasn’t uncommon for semi to wake up before you, sneak out of your grasp, and go on to make a cup of coffee for himself or the both of you. he never wanted to wake you up early, because you looked so peaceful sleeping that he didn’t want to ruin that.
however, that did not stop him from peaking his head into the room to see if you were awake yet. as if on que, you heard the creek of the bedroom door followed by light footsteps.
“eita,” you opened one eye, looking up to see semis drowsy expression staring back at you. “come back to bed, baby. we can sleep in.”
“... but it’s already 7 a.m.”
“7 a.m is really early. we don’t have anything to do today, right?”
“no.”
“so… sleepy time, again?”
semi rolled his eyes, knowing that you would just keep asking if he didn’t climb back into bed. he didn’t know why he bothered waking up early, if you were just going to guilt him into bed again with puppy eyes.
“you’re lucky you’re cute, you know that?” he asked you, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing the palm of your hand.
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a/n this was not supposed to be this long, and this is what it turned out to be... tooth rotting fluff. very nice maki
© All rights reserved by SHOKAMI. Do not modify, repost on any platforms, plagiarize, or claim as your own.
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calif0rnia-lovers · 3 years
Text
Lover of Mine #5.5 | Angel Reyes.
Series Masterlist | join my gc for updates since tags are acting weird
title: For Better, or For Worse.
rating: 💙 💔
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As long as you're feeling the same, I'll follow you into the flames
sum: angel fears once it's out, his secret will be the final push you need to leave. instead of confessing, he sticks out the couple's retreat to give himself a few more days with you. he makes himself a promise: he'll tell you once you two return to santo padre. but a ghost from his past pushes angel's agenda forward a few days.
words: the standard for this series....long af (that's why I break it into sections so you know where to come back to when you take a break...but seriously, please take breaks on these long ass chapters)
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Ez Reyes is a smart man. There is no denying it. However, Ez never thought he would struggle to tie a tie.
He is currently outside of his father’s truck. Kneeling before his nephew, Ez concentrates as he works through the instructions he Youtube’d earlier. A usually chatty Jeyson has been silent. He slept the entire hour's drive to school. When his Uncle woke him, Jeyson shot Ez a glare that reminded him of you.
Jeyson was fine the entire weekend that you were gone, but the moment he woke up this Monday to find you had not returned his entire mood changed. He has fought Ez tooth and nail the entire morning.
Ez glances up from the tie to Jeyson. “Hey, you sure you wanna go to school today?”
“I have to go to school” Jeyson mumbles.
“Yeah, but sometimes it doesn’t hurt to take a break.” Ez offers Jeyson a smile. “If you’re not having a good day, it’s okay to stay home.”
“I don’t want to stay home with you.”
“That’s okay,” Ez chuckles. “What about Izzy?”
“I don’t want to stay home with her either.” Jeyson releases a huff before glancing down at his now fixed tie. He bends down to pick up his backpack. Slipping it onto his shoulder, Jeyson steps around his Uncle. “I want my mom to come home.”
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Tommy’s gaze remains on the sleeve of his blue Stockton uniform. His fingers tug at the loose string resting against his wrist. He ignores the smirk on his older brother’s face. The passing of time has muddled the bruises on Tommy’s skin. The mixture of black and yellow stood out on the parts of him he's allowed to remain visible. No matter how he sits, the pain in his ribs is inescapable. Sleep has fallen to the way-side, the inability to get comfortable meaning he only gets it once he’s passed out from exhaustion.
“You didn’t tell me she was hot. Now I know why you were sticking up for her the other day--”
“I didn’t notice. I’m more worried about her getting me out of here.”
“Uh-huh.” Leo’s eyes roll as he watches his brother’s eyes pass over the crowded visiting center. “I’m just saying—”
“What’d you find?” Tommy’s fingers massage his temple, the irritation in his voice amplified by his brother’s antics. Lack of sleep and around-the-clock oversight and antics from Rogers has cut his fuse short. “If you didn’t find anything, you could've saved yourself a trip up here—and I could be asleep.”
“She’s not married—unless she has a habit of leaving her rings at home.”
“What? On the table?”
Leo shakes his head. “No. A jewelry box in the bedroom.”
“What about the kid?” “He has to be about eight, or nine? Name’s Jeyson. You were right, he’s definitely Angel’s. Wish I could show you the picture. He couldn’t deny that kid if he tried.”
“Yeah.” Tommy nods impatiently, motioning for him to continue. “What else?”
“Kid goes to some boujee ass prep school up north. Gilman something? Embroidered blazers, ties, the whole nine. His mom’s paying a pretty penny too, apparently, it's the best in the state. He’s into the typical shit kids are into. Star Wars, Spider-Man. Plays the piano, apparently, he’s actually really fucking good. Awards and all. His mom’s got him pretty busy. A lot of after-school activities. Looks like she and Angel rotate transportation...She must not be around right now tho.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Apart from the fact you’re still not transported to a new unit?” Leo scoffs. “The kid was with someone else when I was scouting. A girl and a kid with a prospect patch.”
“Mayans?”
“Yeah.”
“Maybe his little brother...last I heard he was hemmed up here. Haven’t seen him around tho.”
“Maybe he got out?”
Tommy dismisses Leo’s suggestion. “Most cop killers don’t walk free. What else?”
“He’s not doing a good job of keeping his nephew safe. I talked to the kid.”
Tommy’s eyes open. “You did what?”
“He walked right off with me.” Leo quietly explains. He mistakes his brother’s silence as a cue to move forward with his story. “His uncle was so into his date he didn’t even notice the kid walk off with me--”
The sight of Tommy’s hand running down his face tapers the rest of Leo’s statement.
His voice comes out low, through his clenched teeth. “I didn’t tell you to touch the kid.”
“I didn’t touch the kid,” Leo’s eyes rolled. “I got him a funnel cake—” “I don’t give a fuck—” the slamming of Tommy’s fist against the table brings the room to a brief silence. The eyes that he has attracted linger on Tommy as his glare nearly burns a hole through his brother. Rogers shrugs off the wall nearby. He takes a step of warning in Tommy’s direction. “—what you did, Leo—it was stupid.”
“How else was I supposed to get him to talk to me?”
Tommy’s response comes out slowly. Each passing word increases his irritation.
“You didn’t need him to talk to you because I didn’t ask you to talk to him. Buying him a funnel cake, or whatever the fuck your grand plan was allowed the kid to see your face. He can open up his mouth and ID you—”
“ID me,” Leo snorts, dismissing Tommy’s claim. “Relax, Tommy. He’s not a state witness, he’s a kid—“
“Yeah, and according to you and his 'boujee ass prep school,' he’s a smart ass fucking kid, Leo.” Tommy lets out a long sigh. “The last thing I need is the kid opening his mouth to his mom about some random guy approaching him.”
“Don’t worry, I played it cool. Told him I was a friend of his dad. Maybe, if you had told me exactly why I went there I wouldn’t—”
It was something Tommy had explained to his brother during their last visit. The less you know, the better.
“I already told you,” Tommy rubs at his temple, the sudden throbbing causing his jaw to clench. “I needed to double-check something.”
“And that’s what I did.” Leo sighs. “What I want to know is, why the fuck you called me all the way down here to check pictures in some house.”
Tommy studies his brother for a moment. He shifts forward, his elbows settling against the table.
“You wanna know why I didn’t tell you? You don’t think, Leo. I ask you to do one thing—one fucking thing—and you almost fuck it up. If I wanted you to think I wouldn’t have told you exactly what to do.” Leo’s jaw tightens as his brother continues. “You trying to think leads to you doing dumb shit like kidnapping her fucking son—”
“I didn’t kidnap him,” Leo mumbles.
Tommy’s fingers massage his clenched fist. “You’re lucky I can’t reach across this fucking table right now.”
Leo’s gaze drops from his brothers. The look that lies in Tommy’s eyes is one he’s seen before—at least not directed at him. It’s the look that accompanied the acts that earned Tommy his nickname. Leo’s gaze nervously shifts towards Rogers who is still watching Tommy from his post.
“What do you want with her? Thinking she’s gonna give you a shot? Criminal is her type, and she’s definitely yours.”
“It’s not her I need. It’s Angel.” Tommy starts, his jaw tightening as his gaze remains on Leo. “And if you want Angel, you need her.”
“If she’s as good as you say, what do you need Angel for? You’ve been talking about her like she might actually get you off.”
Leo steals a brave glance at his brother. He watches as Tommy looks up from his tattooed knuckles.
“No matter how hard you pray, people like me and you don't come out on the right side of the law. No matter how fucking good she is, she can't get me out of this. This shit is stacked too high against me." Tommy’s gaze shifts to the clock overhead. “Did you find the necklace?”
Leo nods as Tommy stands.
“Good, go ahead and do what I asked.” Tommy pauses, his voice lowering as his gaze meets his brothers. “Nothing else, Leonardo. The time I'm looking at right now, I’ll fucking kill you right here if you pull some shit like that again.”
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At some point Monday night, Angel abandoned his spot on the sofa to crawl into bed with you. His intention may have been to take one side of the bed, but to no surprise, he has failed.
You came to this revelation at two o’clock in the morning when you tried to roll over but found it to be impossible. You have been stuck on your back ever since. You attempted to fall back asleep but have not been able to.
Cheek pressed against your chest, arm wrapped around your waist, Angel hasn’t moved. He doesn’t move when your alarm goes off at 7:30 or when the knock comes on the door at 8:00.
The sleep Angel lost, the past two days over Tommy seems to have piled onto him. He only wakes when your fingers brush through his hair, the warmth of your touch lingering against his cheek.
“You have to get up and eat something.”
“I’m not hungry.” Angel mumbles. The sunlight peeking through the curtains prompts him to burrow his face against your neck. “I’m tired.”
“Yeah, I can tell,” you smile softly. “But, I’m hungry, and I can’t get our food with you laying on top of me.”
Your words are met with a huff before Angel rolls over. Resting on his back, he watches the fan spin as you get out of bed.
His first instinct is to check his phone. He pushes himself up, his body protesting with the sudden movement, once he realizes his cellphone is not where he left it.
“Where’s my phone?”
His palms pressed against his eyes as he pushes away the enticing thought of laying back down for a few more hours of sleep.
“It kept going off,” you look up from the plate in your hand. “Ezekiel kept texting you.”
“What did he want?”
Angel watches you shrug. “I don’t know. I put it in the drawer. I tried to wake you up, but you were literally dead.”
Angel releases a sigh of relief before reaching over to open the bedside drawer. Facedown, his phone has several notifications. He ignores the rest, focusing on those from his younger brother.
2:30 a.m. 📲 : You still up?
2:35 a.m. 📲 : Talked to Bishop. Found out what the shipment was
3:00 a.m. 📲 : Pretty sure I found something else
3:02 a.m. 📲 : Don’t know if this is the guy. If it is we might have a problem
3:03 a.m. 📲: Found this in the paper
3:04 a.m. 📲 : Check it out and call me back.
The last incoming message was a photo, the front page of the Daily Imperial Gazette. Angel scans the article as you climb back into bed. A few phrases stick as he reads, “Man charged in Santo Padre murder…” “Thomas Flores, 30, has been charged…” “...obtained representation from Lorente & Rothman…” “...Friday, Flores was denied bond…”
“I have to tell you something.”
Angel instinctively hits the power button on his phone. Glancing up, he realizes you haven’t even bothered to look up at him. Your focus is on the half-eaten croissant in your hand.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong,” you explain as you take another bite of your croissant. “The case Samuel gave me—the one Aiden is helping me with—it’s for this guy. His name’s Tommy Flores. He has some pretty...intense charges, so you’re probably going to hear people talking about it soon. We had court Friday, and the judge...he’s pretty tough. He denied any form of a bond, he didn’t even bother trying to set a ridiculously high one.”
You glance up to find Angel’s eyes on you. His unreadable expression causes your brow to furrow. You mistake the look in his eyes as uncertainty.
“I honestly don’t think it’s anything you have to worry about.” Offering him a smile, you lightly roll your eyes. “But I’m going to have to start working late when we get back, so I need to know that what happened Friday won’t happen again.”
You wait for Angel’s response, but it doesn’t come.
“If I take over morning drop-offs, can I count on you to pick Jeyson up after school?” You continue. “Or, do I have to ask Isabela to do it...Angel?”
Angel blinks as your fingers snap.
“Are you listening to me?” The irritation he finds as his focus shifts to you causes him to nod.
Angel nods a second time as he takes in the look of skepticism on your face.
“Yeah, I’m listening.”
“So, you’re good with picking Jeyson up from school?” You clarify. “Every day of the week?”
Angel unlocks his phone, nodding for the third time. “Yeah. I’ll pick him up.”
“And if you can’t,” you reach forward. You catch Angel's chin forcing him to look at you. “You call and let me know the moment you find out?”
Nodding, Angel drops his eyes the second your gaze meets his. “I gotta call Ez.”
Despite his admission, your hand doesn’t drop preventing him from getting up. For a moment, Angel thinks you’ll let it go. For once, you will ignore the feeling you get each time you notice a change in him. It is something no one else in his life can seem to do. It is something you’ve been able to do your entire life. It is something Angel wishes you couldn’t do.
“What’s wrong?”
Angel shakes his head as you release him. He keeps his eyes trained on the plate in your lap avoiding your gaze as your touch brushes through his hair. It's a habit. Angel knows the moment he meets your gaze he’ll tell you whatever is on his mind. It’s impossible not to do when he knows you can read him best that way. He picks up what’s left of your croissant and takes a bite.
You sit your plate aside before closing the distance between the two of you. Angel’s eyes lift to meet yours as you settle on his lap. The warmth of your palms finds his cheeks as you take his face in your hands.
“I’ve known you nearly my entire life, Angel. I know you don’t believe it, but I can tell when you’re lying to me. Just like I can tell when you’re upset and anxious. And when you’re going to annoy me.” The soft smile on your lips brings a weak one to his. “There’s no point in trying to act like I don’t. What’s wrong?”
“You were right about Friday night. I wasn’t with Samuel. I wasn’t even in Santo Padre.” Angel lets out a deep breath. His voice low as your fingers toys with the hair at the nape of his neck. “Ez and I were in Mexico. I left when you were in court. I knew we weren’t going to make it back in time, but I didn’t want to have to tell you because I knew you’d be pissed.”
“What happened to your hand?”
He watches you lift it. Your finger traces the bandage.
“Cut it on a shovel.”
Your gaze lifts to find his focus on the path your finger traces.
“...okay.”
Angel shook his head. “It’s not okay—I fucked up. Forreal this time—“
"What? On Friday?” You let out a deep breath. “Angel, I know I freaked out. Missing the recital—yeah, it was fucked up—but it is not the worse thing you’ve done.”
“I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve that.” Your eyes watch him release a tired laugh, his gaze down. "You defend me, even when you shouldn’t.”
It is true. Defending Angel has been second nature your entire life. Often you do it in response to others. But also in response to him. When you were teenagers, you learned a valuable lesson about him. Angel is his worst critic. He’ll talk himself down harsher than anyone, even those who hate him.
“It’s because I love you.” Your arms wrap around his neck pulling him into a hug. “Just because we fight and say stupid things to each other doesn’t mean that I don’t love you, Angel. If I haven’t been able to stop doing that our entire time together, I don’t know why you think a fight in a therapy session is going to be the final straw. Me not talking to you is just the easiest way for me not to say something I’ll regret later.”
Angel’s grip tightens around you as your lips press against his skin.
“At this point, there isn’t anything you can do or say that’s going to make me stop loving you.” The reassurance in your voice lifts his gaze to yours. “Okay?”
Your lips press against his in a soft kiss. You leave a second against his forehead before getting up.
“I have to take a shower,” you announce as Angel’s arm wraps around your waist guiding your body back towards his. Your fingers drift into his hair as his head rests against you. “There’s more food you should eat before we go out.”
The two of you stay that way for nearly a minute. Angel releases you as the sound of your ringing phone fills the air.
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Silence from Angel Reyes is a bad sign. Such a rarity, it wrings your stomach into knots. It has been hours since you woke to find him sleeping against you. Angel has said just as little as he did in the morning. When you stepped out of the shower, you found him fully dressed and brushing his teeth.
You glance over your shoulder to find he’s standing where you last left him. Arms crossed over his chest Angel rests against the wall as far from the line as possible. With his sunglasses on, you can’t tell where he’s looking. The corner of his lips turns up into a small smile as you come to a stop before him.
“Who knew smoothies took forever to make,” he sighs as your arms wrap around his waist.
Resting your cheek against Angel's chest, you tighten your grip. You listen to the steady rhythm of his heart as his lips press against your hair.
“I want you to come somewhere with me tonight.”
“No,” Angel chuckles. You tip your head back, pouting as his gaze drops to yours.
He shakes his head as your weight shifts to your toes.
“Please,” you ask, your lips pressing a kiss against his.
“Last time I did that, you ripped me to shreds,” he laughs. “I haven’t even had time to recover from that.”
“It’ll be fun,” you promise. The second kiss you leave morphs Angel's smile into a grin. You leave a third, this one against his cheek. “I promise.”
Angel releases a long breath as you take a step back, a grin on your face.
“It better be,” he shakes his head as you quickly press a final kiss against his lips before turning to retrieve your order.
As you reach the corner, your cell phone vibrates in your back pocket. You don’t bother checking who it is. Aiden has called you three times. You had sent him a text message in response to his first three calls. Telling him to ask Isabela for help on whatever he needed.
The moment the call goes to voicemail, the vibration picks back up.
You force yourself to take a breath as Angel leads you outside.
“Hi, Aiden--”
“I know this week is supposed to be for you and Angel,” Aiden's voice comes out in a rushed whisper. “But, I need your help.”
“Where are you?” You ask as you take a sip of your smoothie. “And, why are you whispering?”
“I’m at the courthouse,” Aiden sighs. “I’ve been here all morning, and they’re giving me the run-around.”
“About what?”
“The Warden called the office this morning. You weren’t there, so I answered your desk phone. He didn’t give me many details, just that Flores was detained last night. They couldn't get him to say anything—to no surprise—but one of the guards said he was involved in an altercation with another inmate. Apparently, Tommy messed him up pretty bad—like...transported to the local hospital bad.”
Angel glances over at you as you slip out of his grip. You take a seat at the table he stops alongside.
In the short time, you’ve worked with Aiden, you’ve learned one thing. The moment he thinks there is something to panic about, Aiden will panic. So, if you sound stressed it kicks off his panicking.
Resting your face in your hand, you speak quietly. “So, he wasn't transferred on Friday as I'd requested? If he was he couldn't have gotten in a fight.”
“I know. Apparently this isn't the first one he's been in. The Warden said he looks like he’s been roughed up in the past few days. I’ve been here since first thing this morning—”
“Let me guess.” You rest back against your seat. “They told you there’s nothing they can do, with the prison being at full capacity they don’t have a cell for him?”
A brief silence falls over the receiver. Aiden’s brow furrows.
“Yeah—how'd you know?”
“That’s because it’s bullshit,” you pinch the bridge of your nose. “Judge Miller was hoping you’d leave and not press the issue.”
“Shit,” Aiden mumbles. “Shit, should I call Samuel—”
“God no. Aiden, I’ll tell you what to do, and say, just relax.”
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“I lied to you.”
Angel glances down at you as your lips press against his knuckles. “About what?”
“About wanting to wait to get married.”
Your admission leaves Angel quiet. He opens his mouth to speak, but it closes as you place a second kiss against his skin.
You tilt your head back to find his eyes focused on the water.
“I was talking to Izzy the other day—not about getting married—but about you and...I mean...we’re trying to have another kid.” You backtrack as his gaze drifts to you. “That’s not the only reason, but I don’t want to spend another seven years playing house with you, Angel. I have tried so hard to find reasons why we should just leave each other in the past, but it’s impossible. I can’t help thinking that we’ve wasted so much time trying to fight it we should just get married.”
If he is excited by your words, Angel doesn’t show it. If he’s anxious by your words Angel doesn’t show it. The only response he gives is the furrowing of his brow as his pace slows before coming to a complete stop.
“I thought you’d be...a little happier,” you admit. The butterflies in your stomach seem to double in size as Angel's gaze focuses on your interlaced fingers.
“Right now?” Angel gently squeezes your hand, the smile slowly spreading across his lips causing you to shake your head. “A fancy place like this I’m pretty sure we could find someone to do it tonight.”
“Preferably with your son there,” you giggle as his lips press against your forehead.
“Just so you know,” Angel mumbles as he leaves a kiss against your lips. “You can’t take it back.”
“It’d be pointless,” you admit, your eyes focused on the incoming tide. “Regardless of what I say, you’re impossible to escape.”
“Like you said, it must be fate,” he teases as you step back towards the security of the shore.
“I didn’t say fate. I said I was tired of trying to outrun you.”
Angel’s eyes roll. “Okay.”
Pushing against his chest, you cause him to stumble backward making it impossible for him to avoid the incoming tide.
“Fuck—”
Angel’s scream is drowned out by the sound of your laughter. He tries to escape the chilled water but realizes it’s pointless as a second wave rolls through.
“Is it cold?” You ask the grin on your face prompting him to take a step in your direction. “Because it looked like it was cold.” The look on his face causes your laughter to return.
“You’re about to find out how cold it is.” The promise in his voice causes you to take a step back.
You catch sight of Angel’s smile before you take off running.
Between the giggles that leave you breathless and the sand between your feet, you don’t get very far before Angel’s arms wrap around you.
“I’m sorry, okay. Let me go, please?” Angel’s grip loosens as you turn to face him. “I really am sorry.”
A gasp escapes your lips as your feet leave the ground. Blood rushes to your head as Angel tosses you over your shoulder. It only takes a second for you to realize he’s turned and is carrying you back towards the water.
“Angel Ignacio Reyes put me down now!”
“Be careful what you wish for, baby girl,” Angel chuckles as he carries you into the water.
It doesn’t matter that you’re both fully clothed Angel carries you out until the water is waist-deep. He comes to a stop. Shifting you in his arms, he grins as your arms instantly wrap around his neck.
“You think this is far enough?” He asks as you take in your surroundings.
“I hate you,” you giggle as you meet his playful gaze.
“I could go further out,” he takes a step forward.
“Just do it.”
Judging by the mischievous grin on his lips, you expect him to drop you in. For whatever reason, Angel spares you a dunking. Instead, he carefully lowers you to your feet.
The chill of the water causes your grip to tighten around him. He waits until you’re standing to let go of you.
You can’t suppress the smile that finds your lips as he kisses you.
“You’re lucky you buttered me up beforehand,” he chuckles as you step around him.
He follows you back to shore watching as you glance down the beach, back towards the lights of the hotel. Your pace slows as you start in the direction of the hotel.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.” Despite the nod of reassurance, you force yourself to take another breath. You shake your head slightly, a tiny smile finding your lips. It takes a third breath for the feeling to pass. “I just—got lightheaded for a second.”
“Uh-huh. Funny how you get ‘lightheaded’ the second I take my shirt off. I don’t know why you still try and play this game at this point.”
Your eyes open in time to allow you the moment you need to react. Catching the shirt tossed your way, you watch Angel unzip his jeans.
"Angel put your shirt back on–I’m serious.” The warning in your voice stretches the smile on Angel’s lips. Your eyes leave him, long enough to drift back to the glow of the hotel’s lanterns still visible. The laughter and music cause you to step in his direction. “You are not getting naked on the beach! Are you trying to get us kicked out of here—”
“I wasn’t planning on going in naked,” Angel laughs. It is an admission of truth, but the sight of your panicked gaze causes a mischievous grin to take over his features. “But, I’m down to if you are—“
“No—"
“You know what?” Angel nods as he tugs his foot out of his jeans. “Your plan is better.”
“Angel—“
There’s no point throwing in a protest. Angel has fully stripped down to his briefs.
You step forward as he moves to push them down.
“I am serious, Angel. Do not do it.”
He rolls his neck before letting out a loud, and exaggerated, “fine.”
“But the only way that’s coming back on,” he nods towards the shirt in your hands before taking a step back. “You gotta join me.”
“I’m not doing this.”
Angel shoots you a look of skepticism as he takes another step towards the water.
“You’re already wet,” he chuckles. “Might as well get in.”
You remain where you are as Angel turns and makes his way into the water.
He waits until he’s waist-deep to start swimming out. He disappears out of sight as you drop his shirt to the ground. Stepping out of your flip-flops, you roll your eyes as you watch him resurface under the moonlight.
“Hurry up!” Even with the distance between the two of you, you can see Angel’s grin in your mind perfectly.
Despite your initial protest, you stay in the water for nearly an hour. Angel stands alongside you. His right-hand rests against your spine, his left interlaced with yours as your float. He watches you, his eyes admiring the moonlight against your skin as you focus on the stars above.
“I can’t remember the last time I looked at these,” you admit.
He smiles as your eyes drift shut. “Mom used to freak every time she caught us sneaking onto the roof to look at them.”
“That’s because you fell off one time. Nearly gave her a heart attack.”
“Wouldn’t have been the first time.”
You bite back a smile as Angel’s lips lightly brush against yours. They drift to the bridge of your nose as you release a soft giggle.
“Speaking of mom’s, yours came by last week.” Angel watches as the smile on your face slowly fades. “You were at work. I was taking Jeyson to school. She said she’s been calling you.”
“I wouldn’t know,” you admit. “She’s blocked.”
“I was thinking...since we’re heading back a day early, we should stop by your mom’s on the way back–”
“No.”
Angel releases a deep breath. He wasn’t naive to think you would jump at the idea. But, since seeing her, Angel couldn’t get the thought out of his mind.
“I know ya’ll don’t get along, but my mom’s not here to see Jeyson grow up. I think he should be able to know the grandparents he has left.”
“I get that, but I’m not doing it.”
Your eyes remain closed as you concentrate on the waves gently pushing against your skin.
Angel doesn’t say anything else on the subject. He knows your response will stay the same. It has for the past nine years. He also doesn’t say anything else because he knows he’s the reason you won’t budge.
The hatred your mother has for Angel may be misplaced, but she is too stubborn to admit it. She has always blamed Angel for many of your actions, starting when you were kids. Anytime you didn’t go through with what she had planned for you, Angel was to blame. You missed curfew in high school Angel was to blame. You skipped school on your birthday Angel was to blame. You didn’t attend the college she spent her entire life preparing you for Angel was to blame. You got pregnant out of wedlock Angel was to blame.
It had all came to a head at your baby shower. Angel wasn’t there, but it was the first time he’d ever seen his mother truly angry. Sure, Marisol had gotten mad at Angel countless times. But seeing how mad Marisol was as she recounted the fight she had witnessed between you and your mother, Angel was shocked.
He never asked what words were exchanged, and he didn’t have to. All he knew was that from that moment forward, everyone avoided the subject of your mother.
“I get what you’re saying, Angel,” you sigh. “But, if my mom truly wanted to get to know Jeyson she would apologize. I can’t bring our son around someone that has said the things she’s said about you. If she can say them about you, she can say them about him because Jeyson is your son.”
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“Shit, I really look as bad as I feel?”
The smile on Tommy’s face grows as you look up. The heat covering your skin seems to rise as you start to speak.
“No—” You wince. “I’m sorry for staring—it’s rude.”
“It’s all good,” Tommy chuckles as he watches your eyes leave his.
He watches as you bite your lip. Whatever is on your mind, you don’t share it. Instead, your eyes linger on the bruise beneath his right eye. You’ve seen enough damage on Angel to know how bad it must have looked a few days prior.
“Hey, relax.” Tommy shifts forward in his seat, the sound of his shackles dragging across the table causing your attention to refocus. He meets your gaze. “The Doc cleared me—gave me my two Advil and sent me back to my cell. I think it’s safe to say I’m not gonna die.”
Despite the smile on his face, your head still shakes.
“Yeah, but I still feel bad that it happened. I was supposed to double-check the clearance of your paperwork.”
“Trust me, it’s not your fault,” Tommy chuckles. He watches your eyes drop to his freshly bruised knuckles. “It’s mine. The funny thing about this place is, you always run into people from your past. My mom used to said I never knew when to stop talking. I might have said the wrong thing at the wrong time.”
You watch as Tommy’s eyes briefly drift over your shoulder to where Rogers sits in the corner. His smile returns as his gaze drifts back to you.
“So, I take it you had fun.” He notes your raised brow before backtracking. “The Warden said he called your office and your boyfriend answered, said you were out of town.”
Your eyes roll. “Hey, go easy on my boyfriend. He’s the one who went to the courthouse. From what I hear, he slammed Judge Miller hard because your paperwork has been approved.”
You take in Tommy’s skepticism. You slide the signed form across the table, allowing him a better view.
“Signed by the Warden as well,” you point out. “Thanks to Aiden as soon as we’re done here, you’re being moved out of the unit.”
“No shit?” Tommy chuckles. He nods in approval as he scans the form. “I’ll be sure to thank Aiden when I see him. Guess you were right. He’s got some balls after all...Look, I know I’m not the easiest client….so um….Thanks for pushing for this. Making sure everything was straight. Most people would’ve just left me where I was.”
“Yeah, well I can’t have you die before I get fully paid.”
The laugh Tommy releases brings a smile to your lips. He settles back against his chair as you pick up your pen.
"I need you to understand that this new assignment may not be your favorite," you explain. "You're being moved to a new unit, but I can't get you moved again. That means, you can't do anything else, Tommy. Do you understand me?"
Tommy nods. He looks up as your hand finds his.
"This," your lift his hand forcing him to take in his swollen knuckles. "The shit you pulled. You're lucky they didn't throw you in AdSeg. That's 23 hours in your cell. No phone calls, no visits. Nothing. The only reason they didn't throw you in there is because they messed up, and didn't want Aiden to draw a motion against the judge. I don't care what you have to do, but you better learn to walk away from a fight. Now."
"I know." Tommy sighs as you let him go.
“Then do it. My job is already hard enough as it is. I can't have you trying to kill someone while you're already here for murder. Plus, the judge is pissed because of the paperwork Aiden had to file. That's not good for either of us. So, that means I need your help.”
His brow raises, the corners of his lips turning up into a smirk. “I thought I was supposed to be the one asking for help.”
“True, but help is a two-way street.”
Tommy hesitates for a moment. His eyes drop to his knuckles as he lets off a light shrug.
“What do you need?”
“For you to tell me why you were meeting with Alexander Maddox the night you were arrested.”
Tommy’s smile fades quicker than it came. His jaw tightens as he shakes his head.
You sit forward resting your elbows on the table.
“Tommy, if it’s about the MC.” Tommy’s eyes lift for a brief second. Long enough for you to catch a glimpse of the shock in his eyes. You lower your voice. “I know you’re with the Horsemen—”
Tommy shakes his head. “Look—I get you got a job to do, but—there’s just shit with the MC I can’t talk about—”
“I know how this stuff works—”
“Got a lot of personal experience with an MC?” Tommy asks.
His question causes you to release a deep breath.
“If you don’t want to tell me anything, fine. But when it comes down to it, Tommy. People will cut you off to save themselves.” The irritation in your voice lifts his gaze. “That shipment you were carrying, was not a dime bag. Your brothers will let you go down for this. Hard. They will let you rot in here for the rest of your fucking life if it means avoiding a R.I.C.O. case.”
Tommy’s brow furrows. “What’s a R.I.C.O.?”
His question throws you off. The pure confusion on his face causes you to backtrack.
“You seriously don’t know what that is?”
“I mean—I’ve heard of it...how do you know what it is?”
“It’s what you pay me for,” you remind him.
“Then I guess I’m paying you to explain it to me.”
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The moment you step outside of the elevator, you come face to face with a wide-eyed Isabela.
“Is your phone dead?” She asks the irritation in her voice causing your brow to arch.
“Off—I had a client meeting with Tommy. I thought I told you—”
Isabela ignores your response, her eyes focused in the direction of your office. “Yeah, whatever. I’ve been calling you for the last freaking hour—”
“Sorry—ow.” You wince as Isabela catches your arm. She pulls you to a stop. “What?”
She releases her grip, but she sidesteps. Blocking your path, Isabela places both hands on your shoulders. She ignores the look of confusion on your face, her gaze studying yours.
“How are you?”
Her question causes you to hesitate. “...Fine...why?”
Isabela takes another moment to study your eyes as if she doesn’t fully believe you before nodding.
“Just so you know,” she sighs as she takes a step back. “I did not let her in. Aiden did. He didn’t know any better—bless his heart—”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your mother.” Isabela winces at the look on your face. “She’s in your office. Promise me you won’t make a scene.”
“It’s never me you have to worry about,” you mumble.
When you enter your office, you find your mother is not where Aiden asked her to sit and wait for you.
She is standing behind your desk studying a photo that she holds in her hands.
“Put it back.”
She jumps at the sound of your voice, her body turning so that she faces you.
“Put it back, please.”
Her eyes return to the photo of Angel seated on his bike. A grinning Jeyson is seated in front of him, clinging to the handlebars.
“He looks so much like his father.”
You cross the room. Taking the photo, you place it back in its original resting place before dropping your purse onto your desk.
“What do you want?” You ask as you watch step around your desk.
“Is that a way to greet your mother?”
“According to the last time we spoke, I don’t have one.” You recollect as you take a seat. “It’s been...nearly nine years, so my memory might be a little hazy, but I’m pretty sure that’s what you told me.” Your brow furrows as she moves to take the seat across from you. “There’s no need for you to sit. This conversation won’t last long. I have a meeting in a few minutes. What do you want?”
Your mother’s jaw tightens as she remains standing. Her eyes roll as she speaks. “I take it he didn’t pass along my message.”
“He did pass along your message, actually,” you admit. “Believe it or not, Angel said I should call you and listen to what you had to say. I just chose to do what I’ve done for the past nine years—ignore it. If you’re not going to answer my question, mom, then you can leave.”
“Your father and I want to see our grandson—”
“No.”
She expects more, but your attention has already moved on to the papers you’ve dropped onto your desk.
“See, I told you the conversation wouldn’t last long.”
“Y/N,” your mother objects. “It’s been nearly nine years.”
Your fingers interlaced as you force yourself to take a deep breath. You surprise even yourself as your voice comes out quiet and calm.
“I told you before. I do not want you near my son, and I meant it. I don’t care what excuse you’ve come here to give today. I’m not changing my mind. Your only hope is to speak with his father, and hope he’s more forgiving than I am.”
Aiden stops in the doorway, his eyes widening as he reads the room. He takes a step back but pauses as you give him a warm smile.
“Hi, Aiden! Please tell me you haven’t eaten lunch yet.”
“No,” Aiden clears his throat. His eyes briefly pass to your mother whose gaze remains on you. “I haven’t.”
“Good. Can you order two of whatever you’re having? I’ll pay. We have to go ahead and look over this case.”
Aiden nods as you add, “great. Can you also escort my mother downstairs? She’s ready to leave.”
“I’m sorry for ruining your retreat.”
Aiden’s apology breaks your concentration.
Seated on the floor of your office, Aiden has his back pressed against your desk. His usually polished appearance is disheveled. His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, the top buttons of his shirt undone. His tie and jacket are discarded on the back of your chair.
His apology is one he has been working himself up to share for the last three hours. Each time he thought of sharing it, he’s backed out. At this point, he’s run out of pointless conversation and has reached the bottom of your takeout container that he took over.
“What are you talking about?”
Aiden’s eyes remain on the chopsticks in his hand.
“Isabela told me not to call you about Tommy,” he clears his throat. He steals a glance in your direction. “She said it should wait until you got back—but as usual—I panicked and called you. Now you’re back early--”
“Aiden, you didn’t ruin my retreat,” you sigh. Your palms rub against your tired eyes. “It was rocky was to begin with.”
The admission silences the office. Aiden nods before opening his mouth.
“So,” you smile as you lightly bump his shoulder with yours. “Please, don’t worry about it. Angel was probably happy you called so he could leave.”
Your gaze returns to the slow-paced printer. Upon learning you were coming home early, Aiden had sent you a text message.
📲: I have some stuff to show you about Tommy.
And by “some stuff” Aiden meant a board. He had stolen one of Samuel’s whiteboards from the conference room. The entire surface is covered in your notes and information from Tommy’s files.
“I can’t believe you did all this while I was gone,” you stare at the board. “Your girlfriend might think you’re spending too much time on me.”
Aiden’s smile is sheepish. “If I had one, I wouldn’t have had time to do this.”
“Well, remind me to find you one because this is amazing.” The tease causes Aiden’s smile to grow. “I’m serious, Aiden. I can’t believe you thought you couldn’t be any help.”
“I didn’t really do anything,” he shrugs, his gaze focused on the paper in his hand. “They’re all your notes, I just organized them.”
His eyes widen, a grin finding his lips as your arms wrap around his neck.
“Call it whatever you want,” you smile. “But I still get to say thank you.”
“It’s not a big deal,” he rubs the back of his neck before glancing over at you. “We’re a team….speaking of...I found this.”
The picture he lifts is not new. It is one you’ve seen before. Your brow furrows as you take in the pregnant woman on display.
“I already know who that is,” you admit. “It’s the girlfriend of—”
“Alexander Maddox.” Aiden nods. “Right. I kept going back to your notes. You had one question. Why was Tommy meeting with Maddox in the first place?”
Your head shakes the confusion on your face prompting the rolling of Aiden’s eyes.
“How is this the answer?”
“You were asking the wrong question.” A mischievous grin slides onto his face as Aiden realizes you’re still not following his train of thought. “I can’t believe I figured something out before you—”
“Oh my goodness, Aiden—”
“When he was arrested, Tommy was carrying a shipment--”
“Yeah, something he shouldn’t have been doing by himself.”
Aiden’s brow arches. “You got a history of drug trafficking I don’t know about?”
“You’d be surprised what you pick up on this job.”
Aiden shakes his head as you motion for him to continue.
“While I was working, I kept thinking back to our conversation at the courthouse,” Aiden continues. “You said Tommy’s smart—"
“He uses people to get what he wants.”
“Exactly,” Aiden grins. He lifts the picture in his hand. “Why would Maddox meet up with someone from a rival club, in the middle of the night, with his pregnant girlfriend in tow if he was threatened by them?”
Aiden doesn’t bother answering the question. Instead, he waits for you to make the connection. The smile on his face remains as your eyes widen.
“Because he was there to make a deal.”
“Exactly!” Despite the smile on your face, Aiden’s face dampens. “...but that’s as far as I got. I don’t really know what made Tommy kill him—”
“Of course you do, Aiden.” Despite your reassurance and the confidence in your voice, Aiden’s expression hasn’t changed. “Your brain just needs a second to catch up. Maddox didn’t keep up his end of the deal. He probably tried to screw Tommy over. Not realizing that Tommy would kill him, girlfriend in tow.”
"Well, now we know why Tommy's been tight-lipped about that night. Probably doesn't want it to get out that he was skimming from the club's business."
The hug you give him brings the same response as before.
“I should help you out more often.” Aiden chuckles as you give him a squeeze.
“Careful,” you tease. “Angel’s not too fond of sharing.”
“Speaking of Angel…” Aiden’s gaze meets yours. “I know you asked me not to say anything to him about Samuel—”
“It’s okay.”
Aiden nods, but he continues. His rambling brings a soft smile to your lips.
“Yeah, but I just...I didn’t want you to think I was okay with what Samuel did.” His words come out quietly as he shakes his head. “The way he talked to you...it wasn’t right. You work harder than anyone here—including him—and for Samuel to do that was fucked up. I didn’t say anything in the meeting, and I should have. So, I just...I told Angel when he asked about it.”
“He would have found out eventually,” you laugh softly. “Besides, now Angel likes you.”
“For real?” The smile on Aiden’s face stretches into a grin as you nod.
A silence falls over the office as Aiden’s head rests against the desk. His brow furrows as your eyes fall to your hands. There is a final question on his mind. One he’s tried to find a way to raise since he started flipping through your notes on Saturday morning.
“Are you pregnant?”
The question lifts your gaze.
Aiden reaches into the pocket of his shirt. Your eyes widen as you take in the white card he produces. It is a card you spent the entire morning trying to find. The scheduled appointment one you have yet to share with Angel.
“It was in the notebook you turned over for me and Samuel to review,” Aiden explains as he passes the card over. “Don’t worry. I saw it before he did...I figured he was the last person you wanted to know.”
Your eyes focus on the date. A week and a half away. The initial scheduling may have been premature, but you couldn’t shake the feeling Angel was right.
“Uh...no—I mean, it’s too early to tell.” You turn the card over before looking up. “I should know by this date, so can you not tell anyone about this? I haven’t even told Izzy...or Angel for that matter. I don’t want to say anything until I’m a hundred percent sure.”
Aiden nods, a soft smile on his lips. “Of course.”
“Thanks.” You allow your head to rest back against the desk. “I don’t want to get Angel’s hopes up too early.”
It was the only thought you’ve had from the moment you woke up alongside Angel that moment. But as you glance back at the card in your hand, you know the truth has nothing to do with Angel. It’s not his hopes that you’re afraid of letting down.
You place the card aside, pulling your knees to your chest. Your gaze drifts to the board before you. The two of you sit in silence, eyes focused on your work. Silently willing your brains to come up with one more revelation before packing it up for the night.
"Alright," Aiden huffs. "I think we've gotten as far as we can get tonight."
HIs brow furrows, a chuckle filling the air as he fingers brush against your arm.
"Didn't take you for a tattoo person."
You glance over at him, following his gaze to the ink on your arm.
"Yeah, well, you've never been dragged to a tattoo parlor with Angel," you laugh. "Now, I try to avoid them at all cost."
"It's pretty cool," he grins, his eyes lingering on the design. "He has one too? Matching?"
"Yep," your eyes roll lightly. "Please don't tease me about teenage decisions."
"I won't," he chuckles. Aiden sits forward, lightly patting your leg before moving to collect the trash.
“Aiden?”
“Huh?” He glances up from the takeout containers in his hands.
“How long was he in Chino?”
“Tommy...uh, hold on.” Balancing the containers in his left, Aiden quickly rifles through the stacks of papers spread across the floor before him. “Says here...he was in Chino for....30 months.”
“Any way we can figure out where he was housed?”
“I don’t know,” Aiden admits as his eyes scan the wrap sheet. “His charges were nothing compared to now. Petty crime, so he wasn’t housed at maximum. Why?”
Once his question is met with silence, Aiden glances over his shoulder at you.
“What’s wrong?” The concern in his eyes slowly morphs to fear as he takes in your expression. “Did I miss something?”
“No, I did.”
“What do you mean?”
Before he can pose the question, you’re already pushing yourself to your feet.
“Go home, okay? It’s getting late—don’t worry about the mess. I’ll clean it up in the morning.”
Although you’ve managed to mask your expression, the trembling of your hands causes Aiden’s brow to furrow.
“You sure?” He objects. He quickly stands, stopping you from grabbing your keys from your desk. “I can send an email about his placement in Chino—”
“No.” Your response comes out more panicked than you want. You quickly backtrack. The reassuring smile you give Aiden not holding the weight it’s meant to. “I’ll do it in the morning. I have to go see Angel.”
“Okay.” Aiden nods. He passes over the sheet watching as you excuse yourself.
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Jeyson Reyes sits at the table in the center of the clubhouse, his math homework abandoned. His attention is devoted to the bowl of skittles in front of him. He has spent that past minute carefully picking out his least favorite skittles—the yellow.
“Word on the street is you got a birthday coming up,” Angel accepts another yellow skittle before popping it in his mouth. Jeyson’s eyes widen as he briefly pauses the task at hand. Angel’s brow furrows as his eyes study his son’s face. “How old are you turning again? Five—”
“Nine!”
“Nine? Nah--that can’t be right.” Angel shakes his head as he takes in Jeyson’s broad grin. “I don’t believe you—”
“Uh-huh,” Jeyson nods, dropping another skittle into his father’s palm. “I turn nine in seventeen days.”
“Shit—”
“That’s another dollar in the swear jar,” Jeyson reminds him as he passes Angel another skittle.
“I know,” Angel chuckles. He rests back against his seat, his eyes lingering on your son as he quietly admits. “I can’t believe you’re that old.”
Jeyson’s nose scrunches. “I’m not old.”
“Yeah, you are,” Angel laughs, his hand brushing against Jeyson’s hair. “You’re almost an adult.”
“I’m still a kid,” Jeyson giggles as his eyes lift to meet his father’s. “You’re old—”
“Hey—I am not old,” Angel retorts, the feigned look of offense causing your son’s giggles to increase.
Jeyson reaches over pointing towards the beard Angel’s hand passes over. “You have gray hair—lots of it.”
His father’s gaze narrows as Jeyson’s grin stretches as far as his cheeks will allow. As if to soften the blow, Jeyson drops two more skittles into Angel’s palm before eating one of his own.
Angel’s smile remains as he watches Jeyson redirect his attention back to the bowl of skittles on the table.
“Have you thought about what you want for your birthday?"
Jeyson shrugs. “Not really.”
“Not really?” Angel’s brow raises. “You’re counting down to your birthday, but you don’t know what you want?”
Jeyson lets off a second shrug, his concentration on the skittles causing Angel’s brow to furrow.
“You know we’re gonna end up getting whatever it is you want,” Angel smiles as he ruffles Jeyson’s hair. “You’ve been doing everything you’re supposed to in school.”
Despite Angel’s words, Jeyson’s gaze remains down. He chews on the inside of his cheek. The action causes his father to slide the bowl of skittles aside.
“What’s up? You don't think you can get what you want?”
Nearly a minute passes before Jeyson answers Angel’s question. His voice comes out quietly.
“I want you to stay at home.”
Angel’s brow furrows. The response is not what he’s anticipating. “I am staying at home.”
“My home, not yours.” Jeyson clarifies. “Where mom and I live.”
“That is where I’m staying.”
“You didn’t Friday. Is it because you don’t like living with us?” He asks quietly
Angel’s eyes drift shut, the tightening of his throat causing him to shake his head.
“Your mom and I—” Angel’s voice trails off as Jeyson looks up from the table to meet his gaze.
It is a conversation neither of them has breached before. One Jeyson has found himself thinking about more and more. One Angel knew he would eventually have with his son, but he hadn’t anticipated it to be now. He had also hoped you would be around to help him.
“You having two homes has nothing to do with me not wanting to live with you—or your mom. You don’t remember it, you were too little, but your mom and I...we used to fight a lot.” Angel continues. “I wasn’t nice to her, and I made her cry a lot. So I had to leave. I didn’t want to leave you or her, but I also didn’t want to hurt you or your mom. It took me a while to learn how not to do that. Friday...I couldn’t come home because I didn’t want to fight with your mom.”
“You still made her cry.”
“I know, and I’m sorry.” Leaning over, Angel brushes his hand against Jeyson’s hair. His touch forces Jeyson’s eyes to meet his. “You know how you and your friends get mad at each other? Sometimes we get mad at the people we love because we don’t see things the same way. But your mom being mad at me has nothing to do with you. Okay? Just because your mom and I might fight, it doesn’t mean I’m leaving.”
The soft smile Angel offers him prompts Jeyson to give him one in return.
“It doesn’t matter if I’m staying with you and your mom or at my house. I love you. That’s not ever gonna change. Never has, never will. Got it?”
Jeyson nods, his smile growing as Angel places a kiss against his skin.
As Jeyson's attention returns to the bowl of skittles, Angel reaches into his kutte. He pulls out the white envelope that he found in the mailbox upon your return home.
He studies the unfamiliar handwriting. Printed in block letters are his name and your address. His gaze passes over the generic American Flag stamp and date pressed into the right corner. The lack of a return address causes him to flip the envelope over.
Angel waits until he comes to a stop outside of the clubhouse to give the envelope a second glance. Tearing the side, he reaches inside pulling out a single index card. The handwriting matches that printed on the envelope.
An anniversary gift for the Old Lady.
Angel tips the envelope. His stomach tightens as the chill of a silver chain hits his palm. The buzzing of his phone in his kutte pocket goes ignored. He doesn’t need to unravel the chain to know who the necklace belongs to. He has looked at the necklace nearly every day since he was eighteen.
The continued vibration of his phone forces an irritated “fuck” from Angel’s lip before he pulls his phone out of his pocket.
“What?”
“This is a prepaid call from Thomas Flores, an inmate at the state correctional facility. All phone calls are subject to recording and monitoring. To decline the call, please press nine. To accept the call and all charges that will be incurred, please press one.”
Angel doesn’t remember committing the act of acceptance. A moment later, Tommy’s voice echoes through his receiver. For a man locked inside the walls of Stockton, his voice is calm and lighthearted.
“Damn, it’s been a minute since I’ve heard your voice, Reyes. Can you believe I missed it?”
“The feeling isn’t mutual,” Angel growls, his grip tightening around his phone. “How’d you get this number?”
“Come on, Reyes--give me some credit. I got it the same way I got your address,” Tommy chuckles. “I had to make sure to wish you a happy anniversary. It just passed, right? What is it six—no—seven years? Hopefully, the two of you are doing better these days—”
“Why are you calling?”
“That’s the funny thing,” Tommy sighs, the smile on his face stretches into a grin. “See, I was in my cell a few weeks back, thinking to myself—got a lot of time for that nowadays—and naturally, that led to me thinking of you. And how I missed my old cellmate. Then I remembered...you owe me a favor.”
“A favor? I don’t owe you shit--”
“That’s not how this shit works. I think the person who’s owed a debt gets to decide when it’s paid in full.” Tommy pauses, the silence from Angel’s end allowing him to continue. “Funny thing, I wouldn’t have even thought to call on you for this, but you made a simple mistake all those years ago, Angel. You talked too much...If you don’t want someone to use your Achilles, you don’t share it.” Angel’s brow furrows as Tommy’s words slowly begin to sink in. “Now, you know I’m not a religious man, but I bet you can imagine how good I felt when I realized that God, himself, dropped Y/N into my lap. What are the odds that she and I got brought together? Huh? It’d be a shame to let this God-given opportunity go to waste, don’t you think?”
“What the fuck do you want, Tommy?”
“A lot of things,” Tommy admits. “A turn with your pretty wife for starters. The way you put it, she’d do just about anything for you--”
“She’s not doing anything for you--”
“That’s okay,” Tommy chuckles. “You’ve always had my back when it came down to the wire.”
Angel’s head shakes. “No—Fuck this—I’m hanging up. I told you that night. One and done—”
“I take it you got my gift,” Tommy ignores Angel’s declaration. “And...judging by the unnecessary hostility I’m sensing in your voice, you took a trip down South recently.”
“I want what you took—”
“And you can get it back—scout’s honor.” The sincerity in Tommy’s voice would fool a stranger, but not Angel. “After you help me out one last time. For old times sake.”
“I’m not helping you do shit.”
“Damn,” Tommy sighs. “I was really hoping you wouldn’t say that.”
“And you’re gonna leave her alone. Come up with an excuse, I don’t care. You’re finding a new attorney—”
“No can do, Reyes. See, I don’t benefit by losing her.” Tommy explains. “Unless you wanna consider my proposal. Last time I’m offering. I think you’ll find my way is the easiest—for everybody involved.”
A silence falls over the line. The trembling of his hands tightening Angel’s grip on his cellphone.
“Alright, well, my time is almost up,” Tommy yawns. His eyes pass to the clock overhead. “Plus, I know it was a lot to dump on you, so I'll give you the night to mull it over. Tell your lady I said thanks for visiting me today.”
Angel’s continued silence brings a grin to Tommy’s face. His chuckle fills this receiver.
“You haven’t told her yet….Tell me, what do you think she’s gonna say when your secret gets out? Do you think she’s gonna stick around this time? If that shit gets out, you’ll be facing more than some 18-month stint in Chino, Reyes. You’ll be facing some real-time. Ask your baby brother how that shit sits with you. All it’ll take is some rumors about the location of a missing state’s witness to start swirling...evidence anonymously getting dropped into the hands of the right people...then you and I just might be sharing a cell again.”
“Trust me, you don’t want that shit to happen.”
“Maybe...maybe not...only time will tell.” Tommy sighs. The calmness of his voice is the opposite of the feeling causing Angel to force out an unsteady breath. “Do me a favor, check with your old lady on how to get on my visitation list. I think you owe me a visit, make the shit quick, Reyes. Maybe she can get them to expedite the paperwork. You got a job to do, and your clock is ticking, homie.”
There is no need for additional words to be exchanged. Tommy hangs up, leaving Angel standing at the end of the driveway. No matter how hard Angel tried to resist—or tried to appear that he was—Tommy knew the hook was set the moment the call began.
When you pull into the clubhouse lot, you find Angel standing at the base of the clubhouse steps.
His eyes meet yours as you park, but he makes no move to meet you. The question is out before you can step around the front of your car.
“Do you know Tommy Flores?”
Angel’s eyes may be on you, but his mind is somewhere else.
“What?”
“Thomas Flores. He was serving time in Chino. Longer than you—thirty months—but you were there the exact same time. Did you hear about him while you were there?” Your question is met with silence. Angel blinks. His brow furrows as he watches you cross the lot. “I know it’s a random question, but Angel it’s really important. Okay?”
It’s common for people to cross paths. Chino is not a prison. It’s smaller than Stockton. Inmates flood in and out like clockwork. That's what your mind can produce in the time it takes you to come to a stop before him.
But it’s the look in Angel’s eyes that tightens your stomach.
It’s a look you’ve only seen once in your life.
Nearly two years ago. A night you hadn't revisited in quite some time.
When Angel had shown up unannounced at your house. This was nothing new.
Only this time, the pounding on your front door had woken you, Jeyson, and nearly half the neighborhood.
Your initial assumption was that he was drunk—it wouldn’t have been the first time Angel had shown up after a few beers and a shitty hookup only to find his way back to you. Begging you to let him stay the night, swearing to plead his drunken case, only to pass out against you the moment you were seated on the sofa.
Only this time—the moment you’d gotten the door open you were crushed by his weight. Angel's grip had been tight. The pressure caused you to wince as his face burrowed against your skin.
For once, you couldn't detect alcohol--just sweat and dirt. His grip had tightened as you tried to move back and take a better look at him.
You didn't get much out of him that night. The most you could get him to do was shower. Which was for the best because, by the time you'd helped him dry off, Angel's adrenaline crashed. He’d passed out in your bed a minute later.
In the morning, he didn’t produce much of an explanation.
"Sorry if I scared you last night," he'd mumbled as he headed to the door. "I know you asked me not to show up—unannounced like that but—I just wanted to see you."
“Yeah,” Angel nods. “I knew him.”
You wait for elaboration, but it doesn’t come. Instead, Angel takes a step back. He finds a seat on the steps, his left hand reaching up to rub his eyes.
“Yeah, I knew him? What the hell does that mean? You knew of him, or you kn—”
“No, I knew—I know him.” Angel releases a sigh, his fist crumpling the envelope he holds. “He was my cellmate.”
“No, he wasn't.” The response is automatic. The laugh you release echoes across the parking lot. The meaning behind Angel’s silence doesn’t fully register. Your brain is still reeling, trying to find a rational explanation to deny his statement and what it means. You shake your head. “No, he wasn’t. That is not fucking possible—“
“Cellblock D. That’s where they house all gang-affiliated inmates. They don’t give a shit if you’re an MC or not. It’s all the same.” Angel quietly explains, his eyes watching the realization begin to sink into your features. “They put you together with guys from other places, knowing you might not have a brother to watch your back if you need protection. Tommy’s cellmate had recently been discharged. So, after intake, I took the open space—“
“Angel, stop. I can’t have you telling me this,” you cut him off. The sight of your widened eyes not deferring Angel’s train of thought. “Do you know what this means for my case? Why couldn’t you just lie to me—”
“Because what I need to tell you is worse.”
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series taglist: @angelreyesgirl89 @holl2712 @relaxing-najee @thedeviltohisangel @awkwardtayler @siempremamita @amorestevens @witching-hour @seize-the-droid @rosieposie0624 @sesamepancakes @est1887 @queenbeered @ticosas @blessedboo @helli4nthus @katjusja @melanicia @blackcoffeeandgreenteaforme @moneteguiza
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mypoisonedvine · 3 years
Text
Seeing Red | bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x actress!reader (part 3)
(part 1) (part 2) 
series summary: bucky used to brag that he didn’t have a celebrity crush, or really care about famous people at all, which is what made him the perfect person to start working for a celebrity like yourself.  except, of course, it’s just his luck that he’d fall for you.  
word count: 3k
chapter warnings: mention of past sexual harassment, very mature karaoke (lol), mention of pornography
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Day 63 and you still hadn’t talked about it.  He’d actually gotten to know you a lot better over the past two months, even almost confessing his feelings for you with that stupid half-asleep storybook thing he’d done way back when, but you still hadn’t talked about the night you saw him looking in the rearview mirror.
Tonight actually reminded him of that night; this time was a premiere, for a movie you hadn’t actually been in but apparently you were supposed to go anyways?  He didn’t get it but he figured he didn’t need to.  As long as you came back alone this time, he’d be happy.
Of course, when he saw you step out to the car to leave for the venue, he was confident that would be impossible— not that you ever looked bad on a red carpet or anything, but wow… this was different.
“It’s not too slutty, is it?” you asked him nervously, spinning around to show him the back.  Don’t look at her ass don’t look at her ass don’t look at her ass—   
“Just slutty enough,” he responded with a gloved thumbs up.
“Perfect,” you smiled, and he opened the door for you to get in the back.  He took a moment to catch his breath before circling around to the driver’s side.
You actually chatted with him on the way, which was a new thing you two had started doing when he drove you.  He looked forward to your talks a lot— especially the ones where you ranted about whatever was on your mind.  You would usually apologize for rambling but he liked it; and, you were cute when you got really worked up about something, even if he thought it was kind of trivial.
As he pulled up to the red carpet, with cameras flashing and the indistinguishable yelling of reporters and fans, you shot him a look as if you didn’t want to go.
“Everything alright?” he asked.
“Oh, yeah,” you shook your head incredulously, “I just… I wish you would’ve come and seen it.”
He recalled a few weeks back when you offered him a ticket to the premiere showing, but he’d insisted on just sticking to what he knew and letting your assistant have the spare ticket.  “I’ll catch it on Netflix,” he dismissed.
“No, I mean, I wish you were coming with me,” you explained.
Was it hot in here, all of a sudden?  Because his cheeks felt warm.  “Uh, you don’t want me in there.  I always fall asleep in theaters anyways.  Just go have fun and I’ll catch you after.”
“Okay,” you nodded with an adorable little smile.
So he waited, wondering if he should’ve taken you up on it all those weeks ago, but decided he probably made the right call.  He would just embarrass you in a place like that, more than likely, and you had enough to deal with already.  He felt more useful waiting in the wings than being in the spotlight, to use a fittingly-timed theater metaphor.
It was a few hours of him killing time in the car, but he got to relax a little more since the event already had pretty good security on its own.  You’d recommended a book called Flowers for Algernon to him, even lending him your copy for the time being, and so he leaned his seat back and picked up where he’d left off from this morning.  Of course, if he had known that you’d be gone long enough for him to finish, and that the ending was going to make him cry, he probably wouldn’t have read it.  WIth his luck, it was inevitable that he’d be all but sobbing when you texted him to pull the car around.
Wiping his tears and hoping his eyes wouldn’t be too red, he tossed the book into the glovebox and started the engine.  You waved cheerily when you saw him from the entrance, and he attempted to navigate through all the other cars pulling up so he could reach you.  Thankfully, you didn’t have a new friend with you this time— or an old friend.  Jealousy crisis averted, for now.
“How was it?” he asked with a smile as you opened the door and slipped in, unable to hide how happy he was to see you.
“The premiere itself was a lot of fun, I got to see some people I hadn’t seen in ages; the movie, though?  Sort of pretentious,” you admitted as you shut the door and he got the car moving again.  “And way too long!  I could watch movies all day, but that doesn’t mean I want to watch a movie all day!”
“Fair enough,” he laughed.
“What did you do?” you asked innocently.
“I finished your book,” he frowned, trying not to think about it so he wouldn’t get emotional again.  
“Ah, I can tell you’re still a little hurt about it,” you smiled mischievously.  “Should’ve warned you about the ending.”
“No, no,” he disagreed, “it’s not a bad ending just because it’s a sad one… it was a good book.”
You’d already been smiling, but your smile undeniably changed as he watched it in the rearview mirror.  Something softer, something more sensitive.  He liked this one better.  “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
Just in time to interrupt the moment, you saw something on the passing street outside that caught your attention.
“Ooh, karaoke!” you piped up, pressing your face against the inside of the window excitedly.  “Pull over!”
He chuckled at how easily distracted you were, but did as you’d asked.  He barely found time to slow down to a stop before you were opening the door and running out, flashing your ID to get inside.
He groaned as he realized how completely unsafe it was for you to be in a bar… especially now, when you were at your most recognizable and literally still wearing what you’d had on at the premiere.  Thankfully, he managed to pull the car around and park in the closest spot he could find, jogging to join you inside the bar and hoping you hadn’t already made too much of a scene.  His hopes were dashed the moment he pushed through the door, however.
“Is she perverted like me?  Would she go down on you in a theater?” you sang along with the grungy backing track of Alanis Morrisette’s You Oughta Know; your lips were curled into a faux snarl as you stood on stage with your heels in one hand and the microphone in the other.
Bucky’s head fell into his hands, looking around to see hundreds of bar patrons, nearly all of them with their phones out filming you.
“Don’t do anything stupid,” Bucky mumbled to himself, hoping you would somehow hear it and take his advice.  Instead, you pantomimed sucking a dick with a cute little wink and everyone cheered.  “Jesus fucking Christ.”
“And I’m here, to remind you,” you continued, jumping around wildly; you looked like you were having the time of your life, honestly.  If he wasn’t so worried about you, he would’ve let himself smile seeing you so happy.
During the bridge, you stole someone’s water off their table and poured a bit on your head, slicking your hair back and shivering from the cold.  There was something about the water dripping down your face, starting to soak your clothes and make your skin glisten...
Bucky glanced around to make sure no one was looking at him before subtly adjusting his jeans.
He watched you sing the entire song, making most of the notes and definitely capturing the anger of the original song— if clearly having a lot more fun with it than most would.  The entire bar cheered when you finished, and you took a moment to take some pictures with people and meet a few fans, which he thought was sweet even if his bodyguard instincts forced him to interrupt after a moment.
“Alright, that’s enough,” he guided you away gently.
“Goodnight!” you waved goodbye to someone who was already buried in her phone and posting the photo you’d taken with her.
“Have a good time?” he asked sarcastically as the two of you began to walk out together.
“Would’ve been better if you hadn’t been glaring at me the whole time,” you smirked.
“I wasn’t glaring, I was just… watching.  You have a good voice, you know.”
You seemed surprised by the compliment.  “Oh.  Thanks.”
“And your stage presence is certainly… energetic,” he grinned.  “I bet your little charade is already trending.”
“I checked, and it is,” you giggled, showing him your phone for a moment where Twitter was open and you were the #7 topic in the United States and climbing.  “And the part where I poured that water on myself is pretty gif-able, don’t you think?”
He raised a brow as he held the back door of the bar open as you slipped back on your heels and walked past him.  “Is that why you did it?  For the reaction?”
“I did it cause it was fun,” you corrected.  “You wouldn’t know anything about that.  And the water thing was just practical, I was getting hot in this dress.”
That didn’t seem to be a problem anymore with the way you shivered in the night air as he walked you through the parking lot.  “Want my jacket?” he offered.
“No,” you frowned, but you eyed the leather with a hungry stare.  He chuckled and took it off, draping it over your shoulders anyways.  “How far is the car?” 
“Uh, a block?  Not much parking this time of night,” he explained.
“Ugh, these heels,” you groaned, “they hurt so bad.  I don’t know if I can make it.”  You began to slip them off but he stopped you.
“You can’t go barefoot out here, god knows what’s on the ground,” he shuddered; what if there was broken glass or something?
“Well, I can’t wear these,” you frowned, “and I probably shouldn’t be walking on asphalt in red bottoms anyway…”
He probably should’ve warned you before he scooped you up into his arms, but it was sort of instinct and he kinda forgot to say anything first.  You squealed a little but then went lax in his grip.
“You’re gonna carry me the whole way?” you asked incredulously.
“It’s only a block,” he shrugged, adjusting you in his arms a bit before starting the walk. 
It got quiet after that, the cool night air rustling the trees and blowing through his hair— frankly, he was a little chilly without his jacket, but it looked better on you anyhow.  The drive home was quiet, too, or at least quieter than usual, but it didn’t feel awkward, necessarily.  It didn’t feel like a lull in the conversation; it felt more like the conversation had just changed from verbal to non-verbal.  You both looked around at the city lights surrounding you on the drive, silent because there was nothing that needed to be said.  It wasn’t nervous, or tense, or anxiety-inducing like most of his interactions with you (or with anyone) could be.
It felt like time spent with an old friend.  He hadn’t known you long enough for that to be accurate, but he was happy to think of you as a new friend.  He just hoped you thought the same.
Arriving at the house, he dropped you off at the front and watched you make a mad dash for the stairs and presumably your bedroom, smiling to himself as he parked the car and came in to follow you.  He saw his jacket tossed onto the couch and your expensive shoes discarded right by the door.  Going upstairs and peeking into your room, he saw your limp form flopped onto the bed, your back exposed from the low cut of the dress.
“You’d better not get comfortable, you’ll kill me if I let you fall asleep with all that makeup on,” he frowned, leaning against the doorway.
"I couldn't fall asleep yet, anyways.  I'm wired."
“Any plans to burn off all that energy?” he pressed.
You groaned a little as you sat up, starting to unclasp all the jewelry on your wrists, around your neck, and on your ears.  “It’ll take me a while to get out of all of this— but not as long as it took me to get into it,” you laughed.  “Then I’m thinking TV and beers.”
“Beers?” he questioned, emphasizing the plural.  “You plannin’ to get toasted right before you go to sleep?”
“No, it’s plural because there’s one beer for me and one beer for you,” you explained with the slightest air of condescension, but he couldn’t really think of it as rude since it was an invitation.
“I don’t want to intrude on your chill evening,” he refuted.
“No, really, you’re not intruding!” you insisted, standing up and setting the jewelry on a nightstand before approaching him and turning to face away from him.  “Will you unzip me please?”
He stammered a little.  “I don’t… see a zipper,” he admitted with a weak voice.
“It’s on the side here, see?” you lifted your arm a bit, and pointed to it.  
Reaching out to touch your zipper was reminiscent of that old boardgame Operation: he needed to touch the zipper and only the zipper, cause if he bumped into anything else nearby, he got the feeling he’d get zapped.
His breath caught a bit as he watched more and more of your skin become exposed, the zipper ending up so low that he could just barely see the top of something lacy around your hips— and he had to stop there because anything more could induce cardiac arrest.  
“Thanks!” you piped up happily, slipping away to your closet to do the rest in private.  “Will you get the beers while I take my makeup off?” you requested through the shut door.
“Sure,’ he replied, turning to leave but realizing he should ask first: “Shiner or Pabst?” 
“Don’t patronize me,” you grumbled, and he laughed because it was a stupid question.  Trodding downstairs, he grabbed the Shiners from the fridge, stopping to check his phone only to see that it had started to automatically send him headlines pertaining to you.
‘Touch of Blood’ star gives impromptu karaoke performance at Queens dive bar!
He laughed at the picture of you onstage, even though he thought it was kind of reductive to describe you by a movie you’d been in so long ago when you had so much great new stuff coming out.  Jumping back up the stairs, beers in hand, he found you makeup-free (aside from some leftover mascara and eyeliner that hadn’t really made it all the way off) and in a robe, laying on the bed as you pointed the remote at your TV.  He thought you looked almost more beautiful like this than you did on the red carpet; of course, objectively, everybody looks better when they’ve been painted to the point of perfection, but he liked the domesticity of this.  When you were casual and relaxed like this, he could almost, almost pretend you were his girlfriend or something.  And not, you know, a global superstar and his employer.
“Beer me,” you requested as he sat down next to you, handing you a bottle and trying to ignore the thorough view of your legs he was getting in that robe.
“Anything good on?” he prompted as he watched you scroll through the channels on the guide.
“Uh, not particularly,” you frowned.  
“They’re showing a game,” he pointed out as you passed the sports channels.
“I’d rather watch this pay-per-view porn,” you rolled your eyes.
He cleared his throat but said nothing because he was confident there was no good response to that.
“Hey, I’m in this!” you beamed, changing the channel quickly.  He nearly had a heart attack until he realized you weren’t scrolling through the porn channels anymore.
He recognized the film instantly as the one of yours that he’d seen the most, for one very embarrassing and slightly sinister reason; looking down to the corner, he saw the HBO logo and realized it wasn’t going to be edited.  His palms got a little clammy but he tried not to worry about it too much.
“Oh, this girl was super nice,” you remembered as you pointed to a character on-screen.  “She had a bigger role but most of it got edited out.”
“That must be a bummer,” he imagined.
“Eh, it happens,” you shrugged.  “Beats getting fired, or recast in the sequel.”
“Have you ever been fired during filming?” he pressed, morbidly curious.
“Once,” you nodded.  “We were only a few days into it so they had no trouble finding somebody new and redoing my scenes.  Just think: I could’ve been a Bond girl if I’d slept with that producer.”
“You— what?!” he squawked.  “You got fired because you wouldn’t have sex with a film exec?”
“I got fired because of ‘creative differences,’” you explained with exaggerated air quotes, “and, unrelatedly, those creative differences surfaced the morning after I refused to get down and dirty with the EP.”
“Jesus,” he shook his head, “that’s… I hope you told someone.”
“Yeah, anonymously.  Somebody will care someday, but not yet.  He’s still too profitable, and not enough people have come forward.”
He glanced over at you, admiring your profile as you kept your eyes on the TV and took a sip of your beer.  When you turned your head and looked back at him, he realized he’d been staring a bit too long.
“What?” you asked, quirking your brow a bit. 
“What?” he repeated.
“You’re staring at me,” you frowned.
“Sorry, I was just… sorry,” he shook his head and looked back ahead.  What he found there wasn’t much less embarrassing, though: he knew all too well that this was the scene right before THE scene.  The scene he’d watched over and over until his arousal overpowered his shame.  The scene that he’d used to try to satisfy his crush on you, but it only made it worse.  The scene that had burrowed into his mind and deepened his obsession even as he fought it with everything he had…
You know, that scene.  And he was about to watch it with you.  
Bucky was completely, entirely, and supremely fucked.
963 notes · View notes
spenciegoob · 3 years
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Who Needs Luck?
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A/N: hi! I solely wrote this because of my 3 recent visits to NY (no, I sadly did not meet mgg)... plus i’ve been going there my whole life.. this is becoming the longest authors note, but as i’m writing I just want to say the people who work at food trucks in nyc are the nicest people ever, ask them about their day (AND TIP OMG PLS)
Summary: Reader invites Spencer to go to New York City with her where he finally sees the beauty right in front of him.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader
Category: Fluff!
Content Warnings: reader can’t drive very well (I apologize if this is a callout post), slight road rage, language
Masterlist
Word Count: 2.4K
____
I never considered myself a lucky man. Life had proven time and time again that no matter how many four leaf clovers I set out to search for, how many pennies on the ground faced heads up I stumbled across, luck was never on my side. I’ve learned to live with it, accepted my fate as the world’s smartest punching bag long before I was even in college.
But then I met her, and as cheesy as it sounds, I didn’t need luck that morning.
The second I woke up, the universe seemed to have it out for me specifically. I swung my legs over my bed, and in my half asleep daze stepped on my glasses, successfully breaking them. Unable to see on my short trip to the bathroom, I stubbed my toe… twice. Once I finally finished my morning routine more methodically, I walked out of my apartment only to bump into a stranger, sending the coffee she was holding all the both of us.
I had tried to apologize so many times, cutting my words short when they didn’t feel right. I had gotten through a series of “I’m, uh, oh, I, you,” before her smile interrupted my thought process, leaving me awestruck instead.
“That’s okay, but you owe me a coffee now.” She giggled, actually giggled, even with the scorching liquid causing her shirt to stick to her body. “Maybe… together?”
I didn’t hesitate to agree, taking her up on the offer that weekend and never looking back. Even when a loud crash, followed by a quiet, harsh ‘shit’ woke me up in a startle, there was no regret. Maybe just a little concern for my girlfriend who now that my eyes have adjusted to the darkness, can be seen holding her knee on the floor of our bedroom.
“Hey, I didn’t mean to wake you,” she whispered out, grabbing onto the dresser to stand straight again. Once she was on her feet, she came over to sit on the edge of our bed, immediately running her fingers through my hair. If I wasn’t so worried about her knee, I probably would’ve fell asleep again.
“Are you okay?” She giggled at my scratchy morning voice before nodding her head. It’s then I realized how the sun hasn’t even begun to rise, the room still pitchblack. “What are you doing up?”
“Getting ready to go to the city, sleepyhead,” she said as if it was the most obvious answer, but truthfully, it left me with more questions.
“At... 5 am?” I sat up, glancing at the alarm clock three times just to make sure I was reading it right. She may have always been a little strange, but usually at a reasonable hour.
At this, she stood up to continue getting ready for the very early morning. Now I notice why she fell, the piles of clothes leading to the closet had to have at least half of her outfits compiled together.
“Well, yeah. I want to get there before noon.” Even in my perplexed state, I rose from the bed and carefully tiptoed around haphazardly thrown clothes to reach her.
While wrapping my arms around her waist still hidden under my t-shirt, I questioned. “It’s right outside? You have 7 hours.”
She turned to look at me funny as if I wasn’t the one digging through clothes and waking up before dawn to walk literally 5 minutes to my desired location. My eyebrows must have subconsciously furrowed at one point, because she brought her hand up to stroke her thumb on my forehead. Immediately, I felt the tension melt, no longer caring to correct my confusion. She still did it anyway.
“Not DC, silly. New York!” I wish it were untrue, but my heart dropped at her words. She was leaving, going to a city I wasn’t familiar with beyond reading about, solving cases, and memorizing subway maps. Is this how she feels every time I board that jet?
“W-what? You’re just going to New York City?” I inwardly cringed at how desperate and sad I sounded, but I really didn’t want her to leave.
“Mhm,” she mumbled, turning back around to return digging in her closet.
“For how long?” Please change your mind. Please change your mind. Please change you-
Realizing that I was fully awake, she let out a boisterous laugh, allowing the way it bounced off our four little walls to return back to us. It was a sound most treasured. “I was hoping to get back around 9.”
“What?” I leaned back to look at her like she was absolutely preposterous. I mean, she was!
“Roadtrip!”
That’s how I found myself in the passenger seat of her car, no coffee in my hand because I wasn’t allowed until I have “a real cup of coffee.” Whatever the hell that means better happen soon, because as much as I loved watching the way she concentrates on the road in front of her, my eyes were starting to droop.
“It’s going to be another 4 hours. You can sleep, my love.” How she knew me so well, I will never be able to figure out, but I was out before we even made it across state borders.
That however, didn’t last very long. My girlfriend may be short and sweet, but behind the wheel? That’s a different story. The horn to her car is a very familiar sound when I’m jolted awake by a sudden stop.
“Really, asshole? Go!” She yelled, slamming her hand against the top of the steering wheel before looking over at me. “Hey, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to wake you yet. I forgot how awful drivers are here.”
“Where is here exactly?” I questioned, sitting up from my slouched position to find cars practically on top of each other on a road not wide enough for two lanes.
“New Jersey. We’re 10 minutes away.” Wow, I didn’t realize I slept for that long, and I have to admit I’m a little surprised I wasn’t woken up sooner.
“How are we 10 minutes away? It’s at least another 30 to get to the tunnel.” Looking at our surroundings didn’t help me determine our exact location. To the left of us, there were dozens of graffiti murals on the side of what I assumed was another elevated highway. To the right, sidestreets with local businesses ranging from auto repair shops to fast food joints to gyms.
“Nuh uh, stop analyzing mister. You’ll know when we get there.” She waved a finger in my directions, putting a pin in my scrutinization. I pouted right back, successfully playing along to the theme of her scolding me like a 5 year old.
“I don’t like surprises you know.” It was the truth, but her contagious laughter that filled the car made me slightly less disinclined to stop asking questions.
“Oh I know, but trust me, you’ll like this one.” She went to go reach over to grab my hand from where it was resting in my lap, but stopped short and retracted in favor of slamming the horn. “Oh, come on!”
***
“So you drove to a train station... in New Jersey?” I asked while she was… attempting to park the car.
“Well, yeah. I’ve been taking this route since I was a little girl.” Once she finally figured out how to evenly space a two door convertible in a very spacious parking spot, she unbuckled her seatbelt, and was quick to grab her bag from the backseat. “Well, come on mister, we’re going to miss the train.”
To be quite honest, I have never been so lost in my life. I could probably pinpoint our exact location on a map if I wanted to, granted I was given any sort of information, but part of me didn’t want to. Scratch that, all of me didn’t want to, because my entire life has been planned out in front of me before, but right now, I get to be spontaneous with the most beautiful girl on the planet.
“Don’t let go of my hand,” she told me, lacing our fingers together and pulling me forward. “Don’t stop to look around, you will get pushed.”
We made it inside, and if I thought the DC transit system was bustling with people constantly, this place was so much worse. There were hallways left and right, all packed with people in a rush. It seems everybody had some place to be and zero time to get there.
“Upstairs.” We walked up two flights before reaching a platform, buying our tickets and making it just in time for a train to arrive. “I know they come every 8 minutes, but thank god we made this one,” she said as she sat down.
The cart we were in wasn’t too crowded, and once I finally found a map on the wall across from us, I saw that it was a direct ride to the World Trade Center.
“You said you took this train when you were little?”
“Yeah, I went to the city a lot as a kid. This was the easiest, and the cheapest way there.” A small smile played at her lips, obviously the product of some childhood memory. “I used to hop it.”
“Of course you did,” I laughed back with her, thinking about how an innocent looking child would be the first person to get away with sneaking onto the train.
***
“I said it before, I will say it again. Do not let go of my hand.” This time it was more stern, and if I were being honest, I would say that it got me the slightest bit nervous. She must have noticed, she always does, because she continued. “Don’t worry, it just gets congested and I don’t want to lose you.”
She was right about that, it indeed was very congested, but that was okay because she was holding my hand, and I would follow her just about anywhere if it meant she kept looking over her shoulder and smiling when she saw me. Once we made it across the way, and in front of heavy looking glass doors, she turned to me and started walking backwards.
“You okay? This is definitely not off to a great start.” She was wrong, it was off to a perfect start.
“Yeah, I’m okay, but you might want to watch where you’re going,” I said before her back hit the door.
“Please I can get here with my eyes closed.” And then we were outside, and all 5 of my senses were hit immediately. The sun was shining down on us, and before I could complain about not bringing my sunglasses, she handed them to me. My heart fluttered at the innocent act, taking the sunglasses with such gratitude even though she had already moved on to retrieve hers. “Do you smell that?” She asked.
“There are a lot of answers to that question,” I told her, not knowing if she was talking about the smell of the construction happening at the corner, the permanent garbage smell or something entirely different.
“The hotdogs, silly. Come on, there’s nothing like ‘em.” This time, I laced our fingers together, not because I was scared of losing her, I was, but I just really wanted to be closer to her. She didn’t mind, in fact, she let out a content hum and leaned her head on my arm as we walked to the stand.
“Can I get four hotdogs with sauerkraut and two grape sodas,” she asked the vendor, who politely nodded before moving on to prepare our food.
“You’re going to have a heart attack by 35,” I said as I nudged her with my shoulder. She gave me a small push back before answering.
“Is that a doctor’s diagnosis?” She asked as she took our now ready food into her hands, after paying the man before I even had time to blink. I just grabbed the two cans of soda and followed her where she was making a beeline for a park bench. “Watch out for skaters.”
“Yes, it is indeed a doctor's diagnosis.” I unwrapped one of the hotdogs before taking a bite. I closed my eyes and let out a content hum. “It may be a little worth it.”
“Exactly.” We sat there quietly, enjoying the warm weather and sounds of wheels against pavement. At one point, she rested her head against my shoulder, and I am convinced wherever she went would be Heaven.
***
“Are your eyes closed?” We found ourselves with both our hands interlocked, my eyes closed while she walked backwards. I gave an ‘mhm’ before she continued. “We’re here, just keep them closed, and…” her words trailed off. “Okay open.”
I opened my eyes to her holding her arms out in the middle of the largest bookstore I’ve ever seen. “Surprise!” My eyes were bouncing everywhere. It wasn’t too crowded, the large stairwell across the store catching my eye first. There were bookshelves tens of feet high, all loaded with different genres and authors. To the right of us, tiny knick knacks and pins and socks. It was beautiful.
“Wow,” I whispered out, still stuck in my place admiring our surroundings. She was beaming up at me, a hint of pride at her successfulness to drag me 6 hours away to the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen.
“The Strand has always been my favorite place in the city. Come on, let’s go explore.” She grabbed my hands again, pulling me deeper into the store towards a shelf labeled adult fiction.
***
Six books, three pairs of socks and a postcard later, we were back on the busy streets of New York, aimlessly walking and admiring the tall buildings and different attractions. Well she was, I was admiring the way she was looking around like it was her first time here. Maybe I should have been paying more attention to our surroundings, but no amount of skyscrapers or fountains could possibly ever match up to her level of beauty. 
“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” I asked randomly, startling her into jumping a tiny bit before giggling. She stopped us, turning to face me fully before reaching up to grab my face in her hands.
“Once or twice.” The kiss we shared on the New York streets were no different than the ones before, but this time, it felt like a silent promise. A passing between two lovers that no matter where we are, our love is the most beautiful thing there is. “I love you too, dork.”
___
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181 notes · View notes
lokislastlove · 3 years
Text
Best Laid Plans (Fluffy Bucky x Reader) p3
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Summary: Bucky is determined to woo you properly, no matter how rusty he is at dating these days.
Warnings: Some smut at the end, oral (fr), Bucky has bad luck, but we love him anyway. 18+ only please.
This is my first attempt at Fluff, it is not my strength, to say the least, so by all means ignore this. @saiyanprincessswanie I wrote this for you, I hope you like it and with any luck maybe it brings a tiny smile to your face when you need it. 💕 Also remember this is fiction, I know Bucky’s arm is fancy as hell and has no flaws.
Chapter 3 -
🌹 The Third Date 🌹
The office is abuzz with rumors of your new romance. For obvious reasons Pepper never shuns coworkers dating, but does caution that she expects everyone to remain professional regardless of the outcome. Bucky is one of the most sought after bachelors in the building so naturally people notice when he fixes his attention on you. For the two days following your fruit-filled frolic in the hills Bucky is constantly around. He brings you coffee, flowers by the dozen every day, saves you a seat during the meetings, cooks you lunch and even brings Kal in to see you.
“Okay, I can’t wait any longer. You willing to give me that second chance, tomorrow?” Bucky bursts into your office an hour before you leave Friday evening.
You gasp as the door slams against the wall and he cringes, “uh, sure. I’m free tomorrow. Should I just go ahead and wear my yoga pants?”
“Ha ha. Very funny. And no. I let Steve pick the date idea this time. Just don’t wear anything that you don’t want getting a little dirty,” he winks.
You let out a sigh, “wouldn’t it be easier to just tell me what we’re doing?”
“That’s no fun, Angel.”
——
The next morning you wake up to a text from Bucky, just like you have every morning since your first date.
Good Morning, Beautiful! Can’t wait to see you today. I’ll pick you up at 11am. 😀
Bucky has managed to make waking up a highlight of your day, something you never thought possible. Plus you got him to start using emojis, which Steve claims he will never forgive you for.
You choose some dark wash jeans and a V-neck t-shirt with a jacket and boots. Stylish but casual, you feel good, excited to find out what adventure Bucky will be dragging you into this time.
Your phone dings as you race out the front door and gulp when you see the bike again. God he looks good with it though, his light brown leather jacket highlights his olive skin and his dimpled smile has you swooning as you reach him. Determined to get a hang of this motorcycle thing you jump on back and cling to Bucky with a bit more confidence today.
Bucky reigns in his speed this time, and you find yourself enjoying the rush of the wind on your face and the warmth of him in your arms. To your shock Bucky leads you to a ceramic shop not far from Avengers tower, specifically for couples pottery class.
“Steve assures me that this is supposed to be fun and romantic,” Bucky says as you find yourself sitting next to him on a dirty stool with a spinning round table in front of you.
“Steve hasn’t been watching old romance movies again, has he?”
Bucky squints at you, “Actually, yeah but he said it had ghosts in it, and I got enough of those.”
You grab his hand and give it a squeeze before taking a deep breath, “Ok, let’s do this!”
It takes about a minute to realize what a terrible idea this is as Bucky curses under his breath and his arm starts making strange whirling noises.
“Oh shit, uh is clay good for your arm?” You ask, nodding at the way the plates of his metal arm seems to twitch and groan as the wet clay slide and congeal between them as they shift.
“Fuck,” Bucky curses as he shakes out his metal arm and you grimace at the worrisome noise it makes before it stops moving all together.
“Do you want to take it off?” you offer.
Bucky looks frustrated with a hint of panic as he sits there contemplating the best move. He still isn’t very comfortable going without his arm in public.
“Or we could just decide not to take Steve’s dating advice anymore and go back to the tower and get cleaned up?” You laugh and bump him with your elbow.
He scoffs out a laugh, “yeah. You know I used to be the one that was good at this stuff, I was the charming one who helped get Steve a date.”
“Oh is that so? Well I think you’re doing better than you think you are,” you smirk.
“Yeah?” He asks hopefully.
“Yeah, now come on Casanova,” you stand and wipe your hands on the towel nearby.
You can’t help but laugh as you follow him out the door, looking at the light gleam off the metal that isn’t covered in clay.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing, it’s just… gonna be hard to convince me you’re not a complete mess after this one.”
——
You could tell Bucky’s confidence had taken a major hit, well three major hits to be honest. And while he constantly berated himself for everything that went wrong, you couldn’t help but love him even more with each blunder. And when he doesn’t insist you give him another shot after that disastrous pottery date, you seek out Steve’s advice.
“Do you think I should try to make a move? Ask him on a date maybe? Or is that insulting to … men from your era,” you finish awkwardly.
Steve laughs softly, “I think Bucky could use a sign that you aren’t willing to give up yet. You should give it a shot, as long as it’s what you want and not just out of pity.”
“Of course it’s not out of pity, you really think I’d do that?” you ask, trying not to get too offended.
“No, doll, of course I don’t. But that’s likely what he’s going to think.” He placates and gives you a knowing look before walking out of your office.
You push back your shoulders and pull out your phone to text Bucky.
Hey if you’re free tonight you should come over to my place. Maybe around 8pm? No dress code. 😘
🌹 The Fourth Date 🌹
Bucky arrives at 7:50pm that evening and you push the buzzer to let him in. You leave the door cracked for him and finish the final touches.
“Angel?” He calls as he knocks and you hear the door creak open. “Uh, hello?” His voice falters as he closes the door behind him and takes in the candles neatly arranged along a path of rose petals.
You hear him remove his heavy boots and call your name as he follows the path further into your apartment and closer to where you’re waiting for him. You shift nervously on your feet as you wait with baited breath for him to appear around the corner.
“Angel, what’s going..” His voice gets caught in his throat as he stands in your doorway and sees you waiting for him.
You’re wearing a simple nightgown, a silky robe and stockings. The thin straps and sleek material drape softly over your curves, enticing enough to make him pause but not overly revealing to be considered scandalous. You didn’t want to be too bold and scare him off too fast, or make yourself appear too desperate.
“Hi, Bucky,” you smile as you watch his pupils dilate and his chest strain against his shirt as his breathing gets heavier.
He clears his throat and his cheeks glow pink as his eyes flick up to meet yours, “uh hey, Angel. Am I dreaming?”
You laugh as you take a few steps toward him and he mirrors you, “I just thought that maybe I’d surprise you with a date, this time. If you’re up for it.”
“Well, I will admit that my interest is quite peaked already.” He jokes, his eyes roving down your body once more as he gently takes your hands and holds them out to get a better look at you.
You giggle and rolls your eyes, “Nothing crazy, just a simple movie date, and I have the perfect set up. Follow me.”
You pull him over to your bedroom window and climb out onto the fire escape, he follows closely, his curiosity climbing with each creaky step.
“You sure this is safe?” He asks as the stairs rattle under his weight.
“No,” you say simply as you reach the top, “but it’s worth it.”
Bucky’s eyes widen as he takes in the rooftop space that you’ve meticulously decorated for him. Strings of lights hang on the low rooftop walls. A large air mattress is tucked between the pipes and vents, facing a large projector screen. You made sure to add mountains of fluffy pillows and soft blankets to keep you cozy under the stars.
“This is amazing,” he mutters as he eyes the plate of snacks and bottle of wine waiting on the bed.
“I know, isn’t the view amazing? I’ve always loved it up here, but I didn’t know it had this much potential until now,” you remark as you look out onto the glimmering view of the city skyline.
Bucky’s fingers slip between yours and curl sweetly as he guides you over to the soft bed. He flops down and settles in before opening his arm for you to join him. You grab the remote and the wine and curl up next to him. Drawing up your legs and letting them rest against his muscular thigh.
“I don’t deserve all this,” he utters sadly as he watches you pour the wine.
“Steve said you’d say something stupid like that,” you laugh as he looks stunned for a moment. “So let me just settle this right now.” You take deep breath and let it out with a quiet huff.
“I have been the happiest I’ve ever been since you asked me out on that first date. I look forward to waking up every morning knowing I’ll get to see you and possibly, maybe, do more than just ogle you from afar. Oh don’t look at me like that!” You laugh and smack Bucky’s shoulder when he smirks at you and wiggles his brow.
“I know you think you blew it after our first three dates but all I remember is seeing a passionate man willing to chase down a dog through the mud, even if it meant embarrassing himself. I remember you saving me from a potentially fatal injury, and I remember a man so desperate to impress me that he took advice from Steve Rogers,” you bite your lip as you watch Bucky choke out a laugh at your jab at his best friend.
“You may think all of these moments are flaws, but honestly I wouldn’t want to change a single thing. So let’s just –” Your speech is cut off when Bucky’s hands are suddenly on the side of your face and pull you in for a blazing kiss.
It’s as though you’ve unlocked something in him as he devours you, his tongue trailing across your lip and delving into your mouth when you open for him. You moan as his hands slip down to your neck, his thumbs pressing ever so slightly on your pressure points before he pulls away just enough to kiss and nibble along your jaw. The pleasure and passion is dizzying and you feel your body bend to his will. Your hands grasp at his shirt as he nuzzles and sucks along your neck now, making his way to your clavicle.
The feather pillow braces your head as Bucky lays you down and hovers above you, his body heat warming you as the cool night breeze tickles over each spot he kisses.
“God, Angel, you have no idea how badly I want you right now. How badly I’ve wanted you for so long.” He groans against your chest, dragging his nose over the thin material between your breasts.
“Me too,” you breathe.
You push at the lapel of his jacket, trying to urge him to take it off. He sits up, fixing his eyes on you as he slowly strips off his coat and tosses it away, followed by his shirt immediately after. Your breath hitches as you let your fingers lightly glide down his stomach, feeling every ripple of firm muscle under his heated skin.
“Wow, the girls at work would be so jealous right now,” you kid.
“I’m almost offended that you think this is my best feature,” he scoffs gesturing to his stomach, his eyes glinting mischievously.
“By all means, show me more. I did come up here for a show after all,” you tease, tilting your head and biting your lip as you eye the growing bulge in his pants.
“Oh, I think I know how to keep you entertained,” he smirks and lowers himself over you, his hot breath leaving goosebumps on your skin as he dips lower down your body.
You look down as he pauses over your quivering center and lifts the hem of your dress up to reveal your lace panties. He growls lowly and hooks his finger under them, pulling them quickly to the side. You twitch as he blows lightly over your lips, the cool air hitting the slick arousal already pooling between your thighs. He chuckles as you grip the blankets tightly and he pushes his long thick tongue between your folds, circling your bud at the top. You let out a long moan as his fervor increases, the feeling of his rough tongue dipping into your dripping hole and then back up to flick over your clit is driving you closer and closer to the edge.
After the past two weeks of the most intense sexual tension you’ve ever experienced it doesn’t take much for him to have you squirming under his touch. Your toes curl and a broken scream echoes over the rooftops as you come on his hungry lips.
“You’re so beautiful,” he coos as your eyes flutter open and see him hovering over your face once more.
Your jaw slackens, pupils blown as you take in his debauched state, his tousled hair, lips and beard glistening with your come. You reach up and pull him down to you, tasting yourself on his tongue. You feel his metal arm fumble with his jeans between you as he pulls out his aching cock. Your eyes flick down in curiosity and you can’t help but gasp as you gaze at his veiny, thick length.
“You see how hard you make me?” He moans, fisting the base of his leaking cock.
You bite your lip, feeling an overwhelming desire to let him use you in any way he wants. Your body arching into him and your hips rolling desperately. Your submissive side blooming under his dominant tone.
You whimper and meet his eye, “fuck me, Bucky. Please.”
Your voice is soft and timid, nothing like the typical commanding confidence you have in your daily life, and it sends a thrill through Bucky. He latches onto your thighs and pushes them up toward your chest, exposing your cunt to him and he guides himself inside, moaning freely as your walls stretch to fit him.
“I’m never letting you go. My perfect, Angel.”
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rosaliestark01 · 3 years
Text
Dusk Till Dawn - Part 7
Peter Parker x Reader
Summary: Peter and your friends realize that you’re in trouble, meanwhile Tony seeks advice from the other Avengers
Warnings: angst, injured characters, angry!Y/N
A/N: @annies-marvel-imagines will no longer be posting more parts, but she will still receive credit.
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Tony paces around his lab, clearly thinking hard. Lately, that was where he spent most of his time. Currently, He was working on an upgrade for your suit. Usually, he'd have finished the upgrade weeks ago, but for some reason, it is never good enough, and he inevitably ends up scrapping it and starting over.
"Tony, you've been working for hours," Pepper says as she steps into the room. "Vision ordered pizza."
"I'm not hungry," he mumbles without looking up. This time, he was sure that he'd be able to finish the upgrade. Then, he'd be able to move on to upgrading Peter's suit, then his own.
"You've been saying that a lot lately." Pepper sighs as she walks up to him and places a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Does this have anything to do with Y/N?"
"You mean my daughter who hates me?" He mutters under his breath, but she heard it nonetheless.
"She doesn't hate you. She's just going through a tough time." Pepper was a teenager once, and she'd had times where her relationship with her parents wasn't perfect, despite them wanting the best for her. All she needed was time, and maybe you do too.
"Pep, she can barely look at me." In all his years of raising you, Tony had never thought that your relationship with him would ever become what it is now. "Did I do something wrong?"
Pepper didn't exactly know what to say to that. She didn't think that Tony did anything wrong, yet how could she make him see that?
"Come and eat. Maybe we can all talk about it downstairs," Pepper finally said as she leads Tony to where everyone else was waiting.
-----------------------
"Happy?"
Harley was currently poking Happy with a selfie stick he had found under someone's car in an attempt to wake him up. Unfortunately, it wasn't working, and Peter was starting to lose it.
"Dude, he's out cold," Harry groaned in annoyance that Harley actually thought that poking him could possibly wake him up. Harley rolled his eyes as he stood up, leaving the selfie stick next to Happy's motionless body.
Meanwhile, MJ was becoming fed up with Peter's constant pacing. She, and the rest of their friends, could clearly see that he was starting to lose his mind with worry, which was the least helpful thing at the moment.
"Sit down," MJ said to him in hopes that he'd calm down enough to think clearly. None of them could really be in the right state of mind while their superhuman friend was in panic mode.
"I can't-" He argued, and both Harry and Ned had to sit him down on a nearby bench. He seemed calmer, but not by much.
"Peter, just think for a second. Something isn't right," Ned exclaimed. It was pretty evident that something bigger was going on than just you going missing and Happy being knocked out.
"Yeah." Harley agrees, nodding his head while deep in thought, "Y/N goes missing, and Happy is out for the count."
"So someone took her?" Betty asks. Everyone was thinking it, but she was the first to say it aloud. It was scaring them how real this was starting to feel.
"Eloise," Peter huffed angrily. He should have known that she'd ruin everything, yet he allowed himself to let his guard down.
"Pete, Ellie didn't take Y/N," MJ sighed.
"Then who else could have?" He yelled. He was sick and tired of everyone seeing Eloise as an innocent misguided girl when in reality, she was the devil in disguise."I have told you guys since she moved here that she is bad news, but nobody listened! Now Y/N is gone, Happy is hurt, and I'm never going to see the love of my life again and-"
"Why would Eloise take Y/N?" Harley asked, not disagreeing with Peter though not wholly convinced. "What use would she have with her?"
"That's what I'm going to find out?"Peter stated as he stood up, his friends following close.
"You can't do that by yourself," MJ stated.
"I'll call Mr.Stark." ------------------------- "I dunno. It seems pretty clear that Y/N can't stand to be in the same room as him," Bucky stated bluntly, causing Steve to give him a light slap on the head.
"Buck," Steve scolded, but Bucky wasn't the only one who thought so.
"He has a point," Sam chimed in, although not wanting to be hit on the head like Bucky.
"Hey." Nat chastised. She's seen first-hand how much Tony cares about you. "It's pretty clear that Tony cares about Y/N. She is his daughter, after all."
"Does Y/N have a diary?" Rhodey asked, causing Pepper to glare at him.
"You're not going to read Y/N's diary," She states firmly. You deserve better than that. "That is a breach of privacy."
"So she has one?" Rhodey asks but quickly quiets down as soon as he sees the glare Pepper sends his way.
"Hey, it might give a reason for why she's so distant," Bucky mutters to the group, which provides mixed reactions. Few nod their heads in agreement, while few shake their head. Either way, they all have one thing in common, which is your best interests at heart.
"It might also give her a reason to distance herself even more. We want to gain her trust, not break it," Pepper argues sternly. She looks at Tony for backup, but one look at him tells that he is desperate for things to go back to the way they were.
"I'm gonna look," He finally says while getting up. Pepper gives him an incredulous look, so he continues, "Guys, this has gone too far. Whatever is wrong with Y/n has put her in danger. If Peter hadn't sensed that something was wrong, Y/N could be dead right now. I'm going to look."
For the past two weeks, he couldn't stop thinking about what could've happened at the bank. You could have died if Peter hadn't shown up. He was worried beyond belief that you'd not only die but die hating him.
"We all care about Y/N," Steve said, bringing some relief to Tony that at least someone was on his side. "She's a good kid, and as much as I disagree with invading her privacy, I do care about her safety. I think that any information could help. We need to get to the bottom of this."
Sighing, Pepper realized that maybe Tony and Steve were right. Something was going on with you, and she worried that it might get worse if something wasn't done soon.
"Well, I think it has something to do with that friend Y/N has been hanging out with," Bruce notes, causing everyone else to mumble words of agreement. Y/N hadn't started acting out until that troublemaker showed up.
"Agreed," Wanda said. "Nothing but trouble."
Everybody hesitantly makes their way into your room, and Nat's eyes immediately land on two flash drives, a red and a blue one,  next to your computer.
"Maybe these could be something?" She says, plugging the red flash drive into your computer. Suddenly, everything made sense. The flash drive was full of files about you that belonged to Hydra. It had almost everything to know about you, but the most concerning one shocked everyone.
"She knows I'm not her real dad," Tony sighs. Everybody, except for Pepper, seemed to be speechless. None of them woke up in the morning knowing that they'd find out that you weren't really Tony's daughter, much less discover that you had HYDRA files on your computer.
"What do you mean you're not her real dad?" Bucky asks, just as confused as everyone else.
"And you never thought to tell Y/N yourself?" Steve interjects sternly. This was something you had a right to know. Obviously, you'd get upset from finding out from someone else."Do you know who her real parents are?"
"That's not important," Tony snaps, causing Steve's blood pressure to rise. It seemed important enough to you for you to start shutting everyone out.  It's no wonder you couldn't trust anyone.
"It sounds like it is," He says coldly.
Before Tony could argue further, his phone started ringing. Judging from the ringtone, he could tell it was Peter, so he answered it quickly.
"What-?" Tony's exasperated voice was cut off by Peter's panicked rambling.
"Mr.Stark, Y/N's gone, and Happy is unconscious in the parking lot."
Everybody froze as soon as they realized what Peter was saying. Something had happened to you, and that was more important than finding out that Tony wasn't your biological dad.
"What?! What happened?"
"I don't know! She said she was going to the bathroom, and she never came back, and now Happy is lying unconscious in the middle of the parking lot, and I don't know what to do!"'
By now, everyone was panicking. This was definitely a million times worse than the bank incident because nobody knows where you are, who you're with, or what you're doing.
"Okay, just stay there. Someone will come to get you."
---------------
"Are you going to tell me what the emergency is?" You ask Ellie as she drives you towards the city. You didn't need super senses like Peter to know that this was beyond suspicious. It wasn't sitting well with you at all.
"Your dad is hurt," she muttered, but you heard her nonetheless.
"My dad?" Worry began to flow through you until you remembered that Ellie had no way to know something like that.  "How? He was at the compound-"
"Your real dad," she agitatedly reminded you as she rolled her eyes. It made your blood boil how rude she was being. This wasn't like her at all, and you couldn't help but want to get as far away as possible.
The rest of the car ride was silent until you arrived at Ezekiel's apartment. It didn't look any better than when you were last there. In fact, it looked more run-down than it was before.
The moment Ellie pulled out a key to unlock the apartment, your suspicion grew tenfold. Why would she have access to his apartment?
"What happened?" You sighed as you both entered the apartment to find Ezekiel sitting on the recliner with a bloodied rag pressed to his side. It looked like he had the injury, but the pain didn't seem as apparent as it should. Your "dad" wasn't any better than she was, but that didn't mean that you let him get hurt. Still, he gave you the same weird vibes that Ellie did.
"Tony Stark happened," he barked. He suddenly stood up and began going through his drawers and sloppily throwing. "We need to get somewhere safe."
"Not until one of you tells me what the hell is going on," You say. Things were going so well until Ellie showed up. Now you have a headache and a possibly massive problem in the form of two suspicious individuals.
"Stark found out that you've been meeting with me," he explained, but you weren't buying it. The only people who knew were You, him, and Ellie. You even made sure that you weren't being followed.
"How?" You ask, crossing your arms, waiting for a good enough response.
"I don't know, but he showed up at my apartment and beat the living hell out of me," He retorted, his face scrunching up in anger.
You look at Ellie, who is standing by the door. To anyone else, it seems like she's just standing there, but you've had enough training from Nat and Bucky to know when someone is blocking an exit.
"I don't believe this." You mutter to yourself.
"You think I just happened to end up like this?" Ezekiel yells. You couldn't believe that you were stupid enough to fall for this. Their constant push for you to turn your back on your family was a huge red flag that you ignored. Not to mention you haven't forgotten that time that Ezekiel forgot your mom's name.
"What do you need my help with?" You ask, realizing that the only way out of this is to play along.
"I need you to help me destroy the Avengers."
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after-witch · 4 years
Text
Bad Day (Yandere Overhaul x Reader)
Title: Bad Day (Yandere Overhaul x Reader)
Synopsis: You’re in one of your… moods again, barely able to lift your head on your own. Kai wants to help you.
Notes: yandere, stockholm syndrome
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You are having one of your… “off days,” again.
Kai Chisaki purses his lips behind the black face mask stretched across his face. He’s been sitting at his desk, diligently working, sneaking glances to the tablet dedicated exclusively for streaming footage from your room 24/7. It gave him solace to see you curled up reading a book or pecking away at a puzzle or humming to yourself while you cleaned up what tiny messes you were able to make in your room.
But for the past few hours, since morning actually, you had been curled up on the side of your bed doing… nothing. 
He had a feeling that something was off in the morning when you did little to obey or resist him as he went about your routine. You didn’t tell him to “fuck off” which was a plus, but you didn’t greet him or acknowledge him, either. It took you far too long to put on your clothes, and Kai had almost forced himself to turn around and see if something was wrong, before you finally mumbled that you were finished.
After he’d gotten you ready, he set down your breakfast tray and mentioned that you’d be eating alone--he had something to get done. You didn’t reply. He had watched on his tablet as you slowly, almost dizzily seemed to sit down at your desk and pick at your food. A few bites, if that. Then you walked to your bed, legs nearly dragging, and curled up with your pillow.
And now, there you were, still curled up. Kai zoomed in with his stylus, and saw the hints of glinting wetness on your cheeks. You’re crying, silently. The sight tugs at his heartstrings. He could handle it when you cried during a punishment--your tears were a consequence of not listening to his superior intellect and judgement, after all. But the late night cries or the days, like this one, where you simply weep endlessly are a different matter.
He sighs and shuts his laptop with a quiet click. He opens a locked drawer in his desk and retrieves a small bag with vials and needles--in case he needs them. Then he walks the few steps to your door and knocks.
**
You’re crying. You barely realize it until you feel the thick wetness pooling on your cheeks as they press against the pillow. You wipe the tears away, but more come easily to replace them, and you don’t have the energy to move your hands anymore. You hope your silent tears become sobs, soon. Those feel better than the bitter quiet ones.
Everything feels heavy and slow. You curl up tighter and wish you could make the heavy weight on your chest go away. It feels like an anchor--or a night hag. You wonder if you’re dreaming, one of those terrible dreams you’ve been having since you were taken captive; the ones where you can’t move and the world is a giant rush of thick, slowing fluidity and rushing sounds but no matter what you do, how hard you try to scream through your thick tongue, you can’t move a muscle. You wake up endlessly, falsely, until finally the morning (and Kai) arrives.
But you’ve done all the dream checks Kai has taught you (you hated to admit the nightmares at first, but they got so bad that you were losing sleep, and the conversation about your dark eye circles was inevitable) and it’s clear: you’re awake.
You’re not having a nightmare. You’re just… sad.
The realization drags you down further. You’re sad. You’re sad and… there’s nothing you can do about it. You can’t escape. Even mental escapes were few and far between.
Thinking about the past makes you cry, but thinking about the future is just as crushing. What future? Trapped in a room that’s not your own, doing puzzles and reading books, eating food from trays; you felt like a specimen in a zoo, a character stray out of a science fiction short story. Come one, come all, come watch the fascinating (Y/N) as she lives in her little bubble where the only choices she has are the ones we give her!
Whoop-de-doo, you think, whoop-de-fucking-doo.
Yet even your bitter sarcasm, once something you held onto to keep you sane as your captor chipped away at your defiance, feels hollow. What’s the point? Nothing you said had any real effect on him. Or you. They were just words. You were helpless. He could close your throat with a gesture. He wouldn’t--probably, you think, probably--but he still controlled what you did and what you ate and lately, how you felt, and that was the present. Your present.
You swallow, throat dry and begging for a drink, but you can’t be bothered to get out of bed and reach the glass of water still sitting on your desk. Your eyes trace the curvature of the glass, the little beads of condensation on the rim.
You’re a few minutes into your tracing game when you hear a firm, deceptively polite knock at the door.
Oh.
He likes to knock, likes to hear you tell him “Come in.” But you don’t have the energy for that today, so you stare aimlessly at the door. A few more knocks, and then he enters, anyway. Figures.
“I came to see how you were doing,” he says.
You stare ahead, seeing him, but not focusing on him. Your eyes eventually drift back to the glass.
He watches you.
“You didn’t get enough water today, did you? You know hydration is important.”
You lick your lips unconsciously but say nothing.
“Come, (Y/N), get out of bed and we’ll get you a fresh glass of water.”
Your body, your throat, aches for the refreshment. But your mind keeps you firmly planted in bed.
Kai sighs, and you tense. That sigh either means you’re in for a lecture or some type of injection. Or both. But even the threat of a mysterious liquid burning inside your veins can’t get you to move, so you remain curled up, staring ahead.
 You think about turning around so you can stare at the wall and not Kai, walking towards you, but whatever part of your brain that controls common sense overrides the impulse.
Kai sits himself on the side of your bed, his back almost carelessly brushing your legs. It makes you shiver.
“Do you feel ill?”
At that, you force yourself to whisper, afraid of what will happen if you let him go down that road again. Your voice is hoarse, dry, and painfully in need of use.
“No,” you say. You vainly attempt to clear your throat. “I’m not sick, I swear.”
“Hmm.”
Kai reaches a hand across your body and places it against your forehead. You feel his cool skin against your head and realize that he’s taken his gloves off. For you, he said once, only for you.
“Your head doesn’t feel warm.”
You dimly remember your mom saying that, once or twice or maybe a dozen times, when you were trying to fake sick to get out of school. You close your eyes and pretend, for just a second, that you’re little and under your cartoon-character-print covers and that it’s your mom touching you.
You open your eyes as Kai speaks and ruins the illusion.
“Is something bothering you?”
You’re bothering me, you think. You want him to go away. You just want to stare at the glass or the wall anything, really, anything that lets you unfocus your mind and let your emotions weigh you down. You want to cry and cry until your chest heaves and your eyes sting and snot pours down your face.
“Answer me,” he says, and you almost flinch at the order when you realize that it was spoken with none of his characteristic sternness or condescension.. Usually when you don’t listen, he gets stern, almost paternalistic in his desire to make you just listen-to-him-for-once. But now, his voice is soft. Almost… pleading, you think. Almost caring.
You whimper softly when you feel both his hands around your upper arms. He pulls you up, his grip firm but not harsh, until you’re sitting against the headboard. The position almost makes you dizzy--you’d been laying prone since the morning.
“Answer me,” he says again, this time as his hands trace the tears on your cheeks and wipe the remnants away. You wonder if he’s fighting the urge to scrub the saltiness from his fingers--they must feel dirty.
You shake your head, vaguely, softly. You stare at your hands, folded almost primly in your lap. You don’t want to tell him anything. You want him to go away so you can weep about everything you’ve lost, past, future and present. His prying makes your stomach twist with something you don’t recognize. Pity? Hope?
You look up at him and flinch.
His eyes are wet. Tears brimming underneath.
Your captor. Kai Chisaki. Overhaul. Is crying--or close to it.
Instinctively, your hand reaches for his shoulder. Now it’s his turn to flinch at your fingers curl around him, softly at first, then with a sympathetic grip.
“Don’t… don’t cry,” you say. Your stomach feels like it’s doing flips. You hate seeing him cry, and you don’t know why you should--he’s made you cry countless times.
“I’m worried about you, ” he says, “So worried.” His voice is dripping with warmth and truth. You hate it. But it makes you feel like you’re cocooned and safe, all the same.
You barely register as Kai wraps both his arms around your back and pulls you in close. The sudden gesture is shocking, unwanted. Your other hand grips his other shoulder and you want to push away, but the sudden warmth and closeness--physical interactions you haven’t been able to enjoy for months--brings tears back to your eyes. When was the last time you had been held, except in dreams?
“Please tell me what’s wrong, angel,” he says. His own voice is hoarse now, and you wonder if he’s starting to cry. Your hands release their defensive grip and you find your fingers clenching the fabric of his shirt.
“I’m just…” You struggle for the words and grip his shirt tighter. “I’m just having a bad day,” you whisper, finally. You lean your face against his chest, closing your eyes against the tears that spill down your cheeks.
Kai’s hands, which have killed countless men, rub your back softly. He shushes you, soft and plying. You close your eyes and wonder what will happen when you open them again.
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nyctophilin · 4 years
Text
Fake Affection | III
Chapter I, Chapter II, Chapter III, Chapter IV, Epilogue
Description: Han Jisung has been rejected by the girl he likes one to many times. He decides that he has had enough and is set on making her want him back. What could possibly make her want him more than seeing him with her rival after she boldly assumed he can’t find anyone better. That way Jisung and Y/N are stuck in a fake relationship until Jisung’s crush falls for him. Or he falls for someone else.
All rights reserved © nyctophilin 2020. Re-posting, copying and translating any of my works is prohibited.
Pairing: Han x fem!Reader, Hyunjin x fem!Reader
Word count: 5.1k
Genre: College!AU, Fake dating!AU, Angst, Fluff, eventual Smut
Warnings: swearing, mild groping, mild violence
Pearl note -> This got long. Yeah, things got interesting in this part. :)) Also, I realized I forgot to add something so I had to come back last minute and edit it. Yeah, sorry for the delay. :/ I hope y’all enjoy it! Feedback is very much appreciated.
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      The sun was shining brightly despite it being almost 6 PM. The temperature outside reached unusually high numbers for that time of the year, and Y/N decided to take advantage of that. Dressed in a forest green spring dress that reached her mid-thighs and offered a modest view of her cleavage, she was waiting for Jisung in front of her apartment complex. The dress she was wearing had short sleeves, but she decided not to take any jackets with her thanks to the weather forecast that predicted the temperatures to be high until later in the night.
      She was clutching the strap of her purse tightly and impatiently checking the time on her phone every few minutes. It has been such a long time since she went on a date. Just because she was going there to make Mina jealous didn’t mean she couldn’t have fun. What better way to convince the other girl that she missed on a lot of fun than have fun?
      Coming from the left side, she heard the sound of an engine approaching. Soon, a black Range Rover came to a gradual stop right in front of her, the front wheel almost climbing the sidewalk. From inside the car, Jisung gestured her to get in. She opened the door and climbed in, placing her purse over her knees before fastening her seatbelt.
      Without much of a word, Jisung turned the steering wheel and started driving to a destination unknown to Y/N.
      “I didn’t know you had a car.” She spoke, trying to get rid of the awkward atmosphere.
      Jisung threw her a look before concentrating on the road again.
      “It’s Chan’s. He let me borrow it for today.” A long sigh left his mouth. “After a long talk where he told me that if I hurt his baby, I’m dead.”
      Y/N let out a chuckle, and Jisung smiled as well, as the memory of the silly conversation he had with the older man flooded his mind. Another minute passed, and the silence in the car was being filled by the pop music coming from the radio.
      “You look pretty!” Jisung complimented, stealing another glance at her.
      A bright smile invaded her facial features at his words. 
      “Thank you! I didn’t know where we were going, but I figured a dress would be appropriate for many activities.” She chirped, the tiniest bit of excitement rolling off her tongue.
      “What if we are going hiking?” Jisung said, and a smirk appeared on his face when he noticed her rolling her eyes from the corner of his eye.
      “Then you can turn the car. I’m not coming!” Y/N crossed her hands under her chest and her mouth formed into a small pout.
      “I’m joking. We are going to an outdoor cinema.”
      She gave him a side look and raised an eyebrow.
      “No offence, but how do you know when outdoor cinemas are happening? They don’t seem…” She eyes him up and down on the driver’s seat. “...your style.”
      Jisung resisted the urge to roll his eyes at her comment. After a moment of silence, he sighed silently accepting her words.
      “Mina told me about it three weeks ago. She said it was a rom-com she really wanted to see. We planned to go together.” He explained taking a right turn.
      “Then how do you know if she’s going to come if you planned to go together. I don’t know if you realised, but you are supposed to be dating me, and she’s dating no one. Girls don’t usually go to this kind of thing without a boyfriend or a potential one.”
      “There’s this guy from Theatre and Film that she used to hook up with when I wasn’t around. I know from someone that they are coming together.” 
      Y/N let a pitiful smile involuntarily invade her features. It was kind of pathetic how he knew about her whereabouts and still didn’t say anything. She understood that they weren’t together, but they were heavily flirting and behaving like a couple, hence why she and a lot of other people thought they were actually in a relationship.
      She let her teeth sink in the flesh of her bottom lip holding back from telling him a piece of her mind. He was old enough. He knew what he was doing. Or at least she hoped he did.
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      The rest of the way to the outdoor cinema was spent in silence. The only audible sounds being the radio and Jisung’s soft humming from time to time. When they reached, their destination Y/N got out of the car and let Jisung find a parking spot somewhere further away from the location of the cinema due to the parking there overflowing with vehicles.
      Checking her phone, she noticed the time indicating 7:17 PM, and only then she realised how much time they spent in the car. Walking lazily on the pathway to where space was designated for blankets and chairs she saw a sea of people. Maybe not really a sea but there were enough people to fill two of the auditorium in their university.
      For a second she thought she'd lay out the blanket, but then she remembered the only thing she had on her was her purse. On top of that, they needed to ‘accidentally’ bump into Mina and her date and hope they end up sitting next to each other.
      Just as she was thinking about that a squeal deafened her and a pair of delicate arms wrapped around her. When the girl let go of her, and she met Mina’s face, she grimaced, but she regained her composure fast. She smiled at her and her date, a guy she had seen occasionally in some of her classes.
      “What a coincidence you are here!” Mina’s fake excitement was pissing her off. Coincidence her ass. Y/N was sure she knew they were going to be there.
      “Yeah, what a small world.” She gave the two a visibly fake smile and prayed for Jisung to hurry.
      “Are you alone?” The girl asked, moving her head in different directions as if she was looking for the person she came with.
      “No. I actually came with Jisung.” As if on cue Jisung appeared from behind the two, a blanket in hand.
      “Are you looking for me, princess?” A jolt of surprise went through her at the new nickname he used, but she didn’t let it show.
      Observing the angry expression on Mina’s face at his words, she figured that was how he used to call her before they broke up whatever they had going on. She surpassed a smirk from painting her lips.
      “Mhhm.” She extended her hand, which he gladly held and went in for a short kiss. “Look who I found. Isn’t it lovely seeing your friends here?” She sarcastically said, smiling up at him.
      “You guys should come sit with us!” Mina’s date said, and a victorious smile spread across her face.
      “We’ll love to if that is okay with Mina, of course. We wouldn’t wanna disrupt you!” Y/N faked concern and gave Mina doe eyes.
      Mina’s jaw slightly clenched before immediately relaxing and letting out a forced giggle.
      “Of course you can. Why wouldn’t I be okay with that?”
      After that, the four of them went and found a place at the back of the crowd where they could sit. It wasn’t exactly the back of the crowd since there were some more people behind them, but they were reasonably behind. 
      Jisung spread the blanket on the fluffy grass, and Mina’s date, whose name she found out was Jay, did the same as Jisung. Their blankets were almost touching, the distance between them millimetric. 
      There were still 20 minutes before the movie was supposed to start. They sat down on the blankets, and Y/N stretched her legs, finally relaxing for not having to stand on the platform shoes she was wearing.
      “So, are you guys dating or…” Jay asked, fixing his body position so he could see them better.
      Y/N rolled her eyes at his question. The guy wasn’t the best at reading the room.
      “Of course we are. Why would we be here together if we weren’t?” Annoyance was dripping off her tongue. She only wanted to relax for a bit before having to spend two hours watching some boring rom-com.
      “Oh…” His voice sounded almost disappointed as his gaze lingered a second too long on her exposed legs. “Mina and I are not a couple. And since she and Jisung have had a thing before, I thought...” He bit his bottom lip while looking at her thighs that were pretty much bare thanks to her dress riding up when she sat down. “Never mind!” 
      Y/N shifted uncomfortably and placed her hands on her thighs in an attempt to cover them even a little. Mina wasn’t aware of her date’s actions as her eyes were concentrated on Jisung and on the way he looked under the golden rays of the sun that was preparing to set.
      Jisung, however, was burning holes with his eyes into the other man’s head. Upon seeing him biting his lip while looking at Y/N in a less than appropriate way, he felt an unexplainable feeling of rage penetrate his body. What he wanted to do at that moment was to get up and punch that pig into next week for daring to look at her like that. But he kept his composure and decided not to make a big deal out of it. 
      There was literally no reason for him to get that angry. Besides the apparent reason that it made her uncomfortable and he shouldn’t allow something like that, especially when he is playing her boyfriend. But the sudden feeling to rip his head off filled him with turmoil.
      Jisung decided to ignore it for now, and he took his jacket off and placed it over her legs. Her head shot in his direction, confusion and at the same time relief present in her eyes.
      “What is that?” She asked, trying to act unaffected by Jay’s actions.
      “I just thought you might sit more comfortably with this over your legs. It stops unwanted attention.” He subtly glared at Jay, but he didn’t seem to pay him any mind as his eyes were now fixed on Mina’s chest.
      “Thank you!” She said, bringing the jacket further up to cover her thighs better.
      Jisung inched just a little bit closer to her and cupped her face. Placing his lips on hers, he forcefully pushed his tongue in her mouth, taking her by surprise. He made sure their heads were positioned in such a way that the two on the blanket next to them will be able to see the exchange of their mouths. 
      Mina was watching Jisung drag his tongue inside Y/N’s mouth, his eyes closed in satisfaction. The exchange wasn’t rushed, and the way his thumb would caress her cheek so gently had her bursting with jealousy. Jisung had never kissed her like that. Their kisses were always rushed and sloppy, driven by sexual needs.
      When she first heard about their little relationship, she laughed. She thought it was some kind of stupid joke. But then she saw how they behaved. The kisses, the hugs, the hand holding, how he would always have a hand around her shoulders. In the three days, they dated he showed Y/N more love than he showed her in a year and a half.
      Her initial plan was to tease him a little bit, then finally accept to be his girlfriend. She didn’t think he'd go and find himself a girlfriend. And especially not her. From all the people he could choose it had to be her. Looking at them now, Mina regretted her decision.
      Jisung broke the kiss and looked into her fluttering eyes before placing a peck on her nose. Y/N was sitting there dizzy from everything that happened. His sudden boldness left her speechless and burning hot from the embarrassment of being seen doing something like that.
      She wanted to question him. Ask him why he suddenly did something like that. However, a loud sound erupted from the speakers surrounding them, signaling the start of the movie. So she focused her vision on the big cloth in front of her and decided to ignore it.
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      She shivered discreetly as a wave of cold hit her body. The movie was only half done, and with the midnight approaching slowly, a chilly air adorned their surroundings. The weather forecast predicted high temperatures, but at that moment she was far away from her city, and so the weather was different.
      Y/N rubbed one of her arms with her hand, regretting not taking a jacket with her just in case something like that was to happen. From the corner of his eye, Jisung noticed her actions, and he leaned in close to her to whisper in her ear.
      “Hey, are you ok?” His hot breath on her ear made the hair at the back of her neck stand up.
      “Yeah, I’m just a little bit cold. I’ll be fine!” She whispered back giving him reassuring eyes.
      Jisung thought for a second of what he could do. He didn’t have another jacket, and he didn’t want her to uncover her legs. At least not when Jay was around. An idea finally struck him, and he softly called her name, catching her attention again.
      When she turned to look at him, he tapped the space between his spread legs. Y/N raised an eyebrow at his gesture.
      “What does that mean?” She sounded a little bit annoyed.
      “Come sit here. I’ll cuddle you so you won’t be cold anymore.” Y/N threw him a weirded out look. “We are ‘dating’. No one will find it weird. Or you could just stay there and freeze to death.” The man explained his voice a little bit louder than before.
      She pondered his offer for a bit before getting up and making her way between his legs. She let herself fall backwards until her back hit his chest softly. Jisung put his arms around her, and warmth started enveloping her almost instantly. Y/N let out a purr at the newfound comfort, and her eyes shot open at the realisation of what she just did.
      “Hey, don’t get too comfortable, you hear me? I’m doing this just because Mina might be watching.” She warned, her voice stern hoping he missed her last action.
      Jisung rolled his eyes but decided not to bring up the sound she just let out. For now, he just wanted to enjoy the newfound proximity. Only so they can make Mina jealous. Right?
      They sat like that, none of them daring to move. For some reason, Jisung found the position really comfortable. A few days prior at the start of their relationship he found skinship really awkward but now it wasn’t like that anymore. It felt almost natural. Like they have been doing it for a long time.
      Some more time passed, but Jisung wasn’t sure how much. The movie was approaching its climax, and the man felt bored out of his mind. Was it really worth going through that only to get his dick wet? But then he remembered who he was doing it for. He was doing it so he and Mina, the girl who he has been in love with for the longest time, could finally be together. And when it happens, he will be able to slide his hand through her silky hair, and feel her smooth skin and kiss her soft lips without having to call it a friendly gesture.
      His trail of thoughts was interrupted by a quiet mumbling coming from Y/N. Her voice was so small that Jisung couldn’t hear her.
      “What?” He leaned his head down in order to hear her when she talks.
      For a minute, there was silence. Thinking that she didn’t hear him, Jisung wanted to repeat the question when a puff of air left her mouth. Right after, she turned slightly to the side, pushing her head more against his chest, and that is when he realised that she fell asleep.
      An involuntary smile tugged at his lips, and his heart started beating faster. He couldn’t explain why he was so happy about it. It was going to be a pain in the ass. Having to wake her up and wait for her to recover from her dazed form. They were going to be the last ones to leave after the movie was over.
      A whistle-like noise left Y/N’s nose when she expired the cold air of the night, and his smile turned into a grin. Jisung moved a few strands of hair from her face before wrapping his hands better around her to keep her warm. He placed a kiss on top of her head and rested his chin on her head, swaying slightly while continuing to watch the movie.
      If you were to ask Mina what has happened so far in the movie, she couldn’t give you an answer. As much as she wanted to see the film, the girl’s eyes seemed to be more interested in whatever was happening on the blanket on her left. 
      She watched as they were cuddling and whispering to each other things she couldn’t hear. Then Y/N fell asleep, and Jisung seemed to be even more loving, hugging her even tighter and kissing her. She was wondering if he has ever done that to her on the many nights they shared a bed.
      Mina never thought she would be that affected by the fact that Jisung has found himself a girlfriend. After all, he was just one of the many boys she was hooking up with. She never thought she would have feelings for him, but here she was, being jealous of the last person she ever thought she would.
      She had to somehow get the boy back. She wanted to see it as a challenge, but she couldn’t. It had barely been two weeks since they ‘broke up’ and scarcely four days since he started dating that perfect little missy. Love doesn’t fade away that fast. She’ll have him back in no time.
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      Y/N felt someone shaking her arm gently, and she mumbled some incoherent words, pushing the hand away. She was sleeping so well, she didn’t want to wake up. A hand pushed a hair strand that was ticking her nose out of the way before grabbing her shoulder and shaking it again. She groaned in annoyance.
      “Wake up, Y/N! You have to go home. Unless you want me to take you to my place.” Someone whispered close to her face, and her eyes fluttered open, trying to make up her surroundings.
      The first thing she saw when she finally managed to blink the sleep away was Jisung’s smirking face. God, he was so annoying. Ignoring him and looking around, she noticed she was in his parked car in front of her apartment complex. She vaguely remembered falling asleep, but she doesn’t remember waking up to get to the car.
      “How did I get here? Did you wake me up?” Y/N asked, straightening her body and inhaling the cold air of the night.
      Jisung held her hand and helped her out of the car before slamming the door closed. He let her lean against the front door and opened the back door to fish her purse from the back seat.
      “I didn’t. You were way too cute when you shut up. Like a little obedient kitty. I had to enjoy the moment a little bit longer.” He teased, putting a hand around her waist and making their way to the entrance in the complex.
      Y/N scoffed at his childish remark but decided to ignore it. She didn’t have the necessary energy to argue with him.
      “So you carried me to the car? What about the blanket and the other stuff you had there? Did you go back for them?”
      “No, I had Jay get them for me, so I don’t wake you up.” 
      Stopping in front of the elevator, Jisung pushed the button, and they waited a few seconds for the doors to open. Stepping inside, Y/N pushed the button for the third floor before leaning back against Jisung.
      “Talking about Jay. Thank you for today!” The man threw her a questioning look, acting as nonchalant as he could.
      “What do you mean?”
      “Don’t act dumb! I know you didn’t give me your jacket just because you are nice like that. You saw how he looked at me.” She wanted to sound more aggressive, but her voice came out soft and calm since she was still sleepy.
      Jisung found that adorable but surpassed a smile. Adopting a disinterested expression, he spoke.
      “He did? I didn’t notice. I just thought that, as your boyfriend, I shouldn’t let everyone see your underwear.” Y/N punched him in the stomach lightly, and Jisung dramatically bent down, letting out a fake grunt.
      “You are such an asshole!”
      A loud ding echoed in the restricted space, and the doors opened, revealing the dirty wall of the third floor. They stepped out of the elevator and slowly walked down the hallway to where Y/N’s apartment door was. Taking her purse from Jisung’s hand and finding her keys, she unlocked the door and opened it.
      She leaned against the door frame and looked up at Jisung, giving him a bright smile.
      “I'd like to say that I had fun, but I fell asleep halfway through the date.” She giggled, trying to mask her embarrassment. “But it was nice getting out of the house. Thank you for today!”
      The man put his hands in his jean’s pockets and scoffed.
      “You are lucky Mina got upset by you sleeping on me. Otherwise, I would have gotten angry. My shoulders are so stiff from having to support your weight. I might not recover for a few days.” A fake pained groan left his throat, and Y/N rolled her eyes.
      Lifting herself on her tiptoes, she placed one hand on his shoulder and brought his head lower. She connected her lips with his in a short kiss. Breaking the kiss, she stepped inside her apartment and kept the door open enough for her head to be visible.
      “See you on Monday!” With that, she closed the door all the way and made her way into her bedroom.
      She wasn’t sure what was the time, but it must have been well past 11 PM. Taking off the dress, she discarded it on the floor before grabbing the oversized t-shirt from the back of the desk chair. She put it on and threw herself on the bed, letting the sheets envelop her body before falling asleep.
      Y/N’s eyes shot open, and her mouth fell open as the realisation of what she did only moments prior sank in. Putting the back of her hand over her forehead and exhaling deeply, her eyes closed and her brows furrowed. Why did she kiss him? She’ll never interact with anyone while she’s still drunk on sleep.
      Meanwhile, Jisung that just exited the complex couldn’t contain his smile. He couldn’t understand why that was happening. They kissed before to make Mina jealous. But maybe that was precisely the reasons such an insignificant gesture brought him so much joy. Mina was nowhere near. A spark erupted in his stomach at the thought that the girl might have a crush on him.
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      “Do it again! With more love this time. Come on. You want me! You desire me!” Y/N ordered to Jeongin.
      The man let out a frustrated groan, using the script to cover his eyes from the brightness of the sun.
      Both of them, Hyunjin and Jisung, were outside, in front of the university. They had a free period and decided to practice the script for the short movie they were playing in. Hyunjin, although not part of the film itself, was always with them thanks to Mrs. Bae’s affinity towards him. 
      Jisung, however, was new in the picture. Ever since they went on that date a week and a half ago, he seemed to be spending more time with her. She felt mildly suffocated by that but decided not to question it. As long as he wasn’t distracting her from her usual activities, she didn’t mind him tagging along.
      “You don’t make desiring you really easy. We’ve done it four times already. We will start filming in three months. I don't have to be perfect right now!” Jeongin exclaimed letting his body fall on the bench on which Jisung and Hyunjin were seated.
      “Hey! Be careful of what you say. My girlfriend is very, much desirable!” Jisung said in a jokingly offended tone earning disgusted groans from the other two men.
      “Really dude? I could have lived my life without knowing that information.” Jeongin started fanning himself with the script. It was a sweltering day.
      “I don’t understand why you are here. You are only four-wheeling us.” Hyunjin remarked, earning himself a dirty look from Jisung.
      “A car needs all four wheels to be functional.”
      “Yeah, babe, but we are a tricycle.”
      Hyunjin, Jeongin and Y/N erupted into laughter at Jisung’s dumbfounded expression. From behind Y/N, they heard even louder laughter and Hyunjin scoffed at the scene unfolding under his eyes. 
      “I swear to God! Mina has been so annoying lately. Much more than when she used to hang out with Jisung. It’s as if she’s following us around.” The man rolled his eyes as he remembered how many times Mina ‘coincidentally’ happened to be in the same place as them the past week.
      “Tell me about it. And how she is always with Jay from our major. If I wanted to watch live porn, I would have signed up on one of those porn sites.” Jeongin seemed as annoyed as the other man.
      “Don’t stress about that guys. I’m pretty sure these are just coincidences.” Y/N tried telling them, even though she knew everything they said was right.
      “No, I’m pretty sure they are not. There’s someone between us whose attention she’s trying to catch.” Hyunjin gave Jisung a side look.
      “You can’t be sure of that.” She played dumb, wanting more than anything to change the subject.
      “ Oh, please! She’s always watching him. In the cafeteria, when we are hanging around on our free periods, when she’s kissing that loser. It’s like he’s a good movie she can’t tear her eyes from.” Jeongin snapped, tired of the whole situation.
      “Then let’s give them something to look at!” Jisung smirked smugly.
      “What do..”
      In the next second, Y/N has been pulled on Jisungs lap, and he captured her lips in an urgent kiss. One hand was on the nape of her head forcefully holding her in the kiss, and the other one was on her ass cheek, squeezing it. 
      She heard someone awkwardly clearing their throat from her right, and all her senses heightened. Y/N placed her hands on Jisung’s shoulders and tried lightly pushing him away while uncomfortably shifting in his lap. As a response, the man groaned lowly and slid his hand from her neck to her chest, cupping it.
      Her eyes widened in shock at his action and mustering all the force she had in her, she pushed him away, finally breaking the kiss. A loud bang ringed around them as her hand made contact with his cheek. Jumping off his lap, she gathered her bag from the leg of the bench.
      “You are a fucking asshole!” She shouted in his face before storming off inside the university.
      The stomping of her boots was echoing in the empty halls, and the few students that were around decided to make her space to pass. Her thinking was clogged at the moment, and all she could feel was rage and shame. She was angrily making her way down the halls, but her destination was uncertain. She just wanted to be as far away from him as possible.
      Y/N heard quick steps from behind her, and a hand pulled at her shoulder. Without turning around, she shrugged it off and started walking faster. The person behind her also increased their walking speed, but this time around, they grabbed her wrist.
      Just as she was preparing to scream in their face, she was pulled into a hug, her face forced into a firm chest. Y/N felt herself calm down as the smell of a cologne she grew accustomed to in the last week invaded her lungs. His hand was gently rubbing her back, and she relaxed under her touch.
      “Are you okay?” Hyunjin whispered softly in her ear.
      She hid her face more in his chest, feeling shame overcome her.
      “I’m sorry you had to see that. I swear it’s not what you think! We’ve never…” Her voice was shaky, as if she was about to cry. Hyunjin cupped her face forcing her to look in his eyes. She could see concern and sadness hiding behind his brown orbs.
      “Why are you apologising to me? You are the one who’s been wronged here. I just wanna make sure you are okay.” His soft voice was acting as a calmative for her racing heartbeat.
      Y/N felt her insides flip at his caring words. His hands on her cheeks were hot, and she decided to blame them for the blush that acaparated her face.
      “Hey! Step away from my girlfriend, you motherfucker!” Jisung’s voice filled her ears, and she saw Hyunjin roll his eyes.
      The warmth of his body left her, and he crossed his arms as Jisung finally arrived in front of them. Hyunjin was looking down at the other man, and both their expressions were filled with anger.
      “I was just making sure she’s fine. It looks like you took your time deciding to do the same.” The taller man spat venom dripping off his tongue.
      “It’s none of your business how I handle my relationship!” Jisung adopted a louder tone bringing his face closer to Hyunjin’s.
      “But it is when you decide to act like a bitch in heat and make your girlfriend uncomfortable. This is why Mina never dated you and why you and Y/N won’t last long!”
      Jisung clenched his jaw upon hearing the other man’s words, and before anyone could register what was happening, he plunged his fist into Hyunjin’s face.
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Text
the mad hatter — g. w. (chapter 4)
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Summary: Due to your direct relations with George Weasley, you were prohibited from leading the case anymore. But you were given a chance to interrogate him, and the tension between the married couple thickens. 
Words: 2,861 words
Warnings ⚠: TW murder, TW blood, TW injuries, angst, thriller, husband!george, sadistic!george, fem!reader, arguments, mentions of sadism
Disclaimer: hey yall <3 welcome back to another chapter of ‘syaf simping for sadistic george!’, I haven’t been able to be active in this site because of work, so I’m really sorry! I’m making it up for yall though, I have some fics ready in no time so wait for it! Reblogs and Comments are highly Appreciated! Enjoy!
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“... What do you mean?” Your voice was slow, yet it was menacing. “You heard me,” He said, sighing. “So you’re saying I can’t have this case anymore?” Your tone was quivering, trying your hardest to control your anger. The man in front of you, Remus Lupin is the A. D. A of the case. He’s going to be the one to put The Mad Hatter— no, George Weasley to jail.
But he’s pulling on your strings at the moment. Tightly.
“It’s inevitable, Y/N—” “Bullshit!” You slammed your hands on your desk, the pain of your palms didn’t sting, the adrenaline coursing through your veins were much stronger. You’re now breathing through your mouth, huffing slowly like a predator towards its prey. You’re angry, very angry. 
He’s telling you to back off from your own case. 
“You recommended me for this case to the higher ups. And now you want to take it back?” You scoffed, glaring at Remus with the deadliest look you can muster, “Who the fuck do you think you are?” 
“This is my case. I’ve spent a month of my time and my co-workers’ time investigating this prick,” You spat, huffing a cynical smile, “You have no right to take away this case from me.”
“As this case’s attorney, I actually do, in fact, have the right to take this case away from you, Weasley,” Remus spat out as venomously, “Need I remind you that prick is your own husband. You have direct relations to the suspect, therefore you are now ineligible to either investigate him or take any part of this case.”
You two were in your office at the headquarters, door closed shut yet everyone dares not to knock on the room containing two wolves. 
“I don’t bloody care that he’s my husband, he’s a mass murderer and should be treated as such, therefore your reasoning to kick me out of this case is utter bollocks!” 
“You’re a fucking witness now, Y/N! You’re his wife!” Remus finally matched the tone of your voice, the veins bulging on his neck showed the severe control he had on himself to not explode. He sighed heavily, slightly massaging his temples, “How do I make this clear so you can understand, Y/N,” He muttered loud enough for you to hear, before looking at you straight to the eye.
“You have feelings for your suspect. You married him for seven bloody years so don’t give me that bullshit that it doesn’t matter and you won’t get emotional in that room!” He shouted, hand flinging to the direction of the investigation room, where George was waiting. 
Patiently.
“You know this would happen the moment you put him in cuffs. You know already. What do you even want to ask him anyway?” Remus’s tone deflated as his shoulders dropped. You clenched your jaw, hard enough to feel the veins at your temple to bulge. Remus was right, what do you even want to ask him anyway? Why would he do this to you? Why would he lie to you? Why would he play you like this?
Does he even love you?
‘Get a grip on yourself, woman. He’s no longer your husband, he’s The Mad Hatter,’ the voice in your head sternly said, snapping you out from your train of thoughts. You took a deep breath, calming down your temper as you spoke, “I want to ask him why would he target former sexual assaulters, and record himself talking about them.”
Remus shrugged his eyebrows, “Good questions indeed, but what makes you think he’s going to tell you?” 
You huffed a smirk, “What makes you think he won’t? I’m his wife, like you said and the mother of his child. I have the leverage that he doesn’t,” You said, feeling your confidence coming back and your professionalism finally resurfacing after what seems like hours of self-wallowing of ‘where did it all go wrong?’
Remus mirrored your smirk, “He fooled you blind for 7 years. What makes you think he won’t try again for the next 30 minutes?” He questioned, and you nonchalantly shrugged with a lazy smile on your lips, “Guess you just have to sit back and watch me do my job.”
The smile on your lips vanished, your grim expression had slightly intimidated Remus, “Let me in that room, and I’ll get him to confess that he’s The Mad Hatter.”
---
He knew you would come.
George smiled as he watched you walk in the room with the case’s file. “I knew you would come,” he watched as you slightly froze at his voice, before a hard look settled on your face, “Yeah, well, I need answers.”
George painted a small smile on his lips, “I’ll try my best to answer you then, my love.” “Don’t call me that.”  He tilted his head  to you,not quiet catching what you said, “Hm?”
You couldn’t look at him in the eye before, but now you’re standing in front of him, hands placed on the glass table, your fiery gaze straight into his somber ones, “Don’t call me ‘my love’. Or Darling, or Love, or anything. You call me Chief Detective, you hear me?” Your voice was low and dangerous, yet George only smiled at your attempt of intimidating him.
“Now why should I do that?” He asked, and you gave him a cynical smile as you sat across him, “You have no reason not to.”
“Why, haven’t you changed,” George muttered slowly, a smile on his lips. You looked different, and he likes it. Not that he doesn’t like you before, but this version of you; it impressed him. 
It excites him.
“Listen, Weasley,” You leaned forward, glancing at the shackles that held George’s hand on the table, “You’re in my house now. So you better start talking before I force words out of that deceitful mouth,” You said slowly, looking at him straight in the eye, smirking in amusement at his lack of fear.
“How funny,” He leaned forward as well, slightly shaking his cuffed hands to hear the rattle of the iron, a playful smile on his lips, “Was I not in your house this whole entire time?” His smirk widened at the clenched jaw you did, amused at how easy he had you wrapped around his finger.
“Keep talking like that and I’ll have your tongue strangling your own neck,” You spat, leaning back on the chair to get away from him for a moment. The man in front of you isn’t the George you knew. It’s not the real George. Or, it is the real George, only he fooled you all this time.
Only thinking about it made your heart boil.
George chuckled coldly, his chuckles echoed through the room. “I’d love to see you try,” His voice was delightful, yet there was something poisonous about it as he smiled at you, “I want to share that thrill with my wife too.”
“The thrill of what?” You asked, and George chuckled again, “Now, my love, you know I’m not as gullible as you think I am to fall for that. Nice try, though,” he winked. You sighed, getting irritated by his play of words, “Let’s cut off the bullshit now, shall we? Let’s start the investigation.”
He shrugged, “I gave you my word. Let’s start then.”
You took a deep breath, closing your eyes. No matter what you do, you can’t help but to feel flutters in your heart when he smiles, or call you ‘my love’. The flutters felt like knives, though. 
“Lights out,” you suddenly said. George tilted his head, “What?” “Shut up, I wasn’t talking to you,” You quickly cut him, you faced the one way mirror, “Lights out.”
“You have 15 minutes before Lupin knows, so make it quick,” Zabini’s voice rang out from the speaker, and the lights went out. A while later, the emergency light was on, a red glow looms the entire room, giving the space an eerier vibe.
George looked at you curiously, “What is this, Y/N?” You sat silent. You hated it that you had to plan a secret mission with your team just to have time to talk to your husband. You need answers. No matter what.
So, it was no wonder that you looked up to him with your lips quivering and your eyes weak, “Why did you lie to me?” Baffled with your sudden change of demeanor, George furrowed his eyebrows, “Wha—” “I got Blaise to cut off the electricity here for a few minutes, so the surveillance camera won’t work,” You explained. 
“Not even Blaise can hear us, so tell me,” you looked at him again, “Why did you lie to me?” 
Watching the vulnerability in your expression, George’s smug facade faltered. He knew you like the back of his hand, you were telling the truth. Yet, George wasn’t stupid. He didn’t know how you act in your work, so he had to be cautious. He put up his wall again as he smirked, “But I didn’t. I didn’t lie about anything.”
His smirk washed off as you closed your eyes, “George, please…” He watched as you wiped away the tears welling in your eyes, this was the Y/N that he knew, the Y/N that he protected for the past 7 years from his truth.  
George clenched his jaw, “What do you even want me to say, Y/N?”  His voice now lacked the tinge of amusement, you realized he’s serious now. You looked at him, “What happened to you?”
“Whatever do you mean?” He said, and you gritted your teeth, “What happened to you, George? What caused you to be like this?” “This?” He repeated your words. He scoffed, “I’ve always been this, Y/N. I’m just good at hiding it from you and Rafa.”
“Don’t lie to me. You’ve been lying to me for 7 years straight, I deserve the truth,” You voiced out, and George shook his head, “No, you deserve to be away from me. The truth will only make you resent me more.”
“What fucking difference does it make now, George?! You lied to me! You hide yourself from me! Do you even love me?!” You were standing now, slamming your hands on the table. George clenched his jaw, fighting to stay silent. 
“Tell me the truth! Do you even love me?!”
“You want the truth? Here is my truth,” he snarled, “I am that sick bastard you always talk about. I am The Mad Hatter!” 
“Of course I fucking do!” He stood up abruptly, startling you. The handcuffs rattled more as he tried to yank his wrists away from the table. “If I don’t love you, then I would have drowned you that night we met! I wouldn’t have Rafael with you! I would have killed you!” His voice was loud and clear, yet his feelings inside couldn't exactly say the same thing.
George Weasley had lost control of his composure.
“No, no…” You muttered, shaking your head slowly, “But you’re an angel to me! You’re an angel to me and Rafa, George!” You said, desperation clinging onto your voice tightly. 
“If I am one,” He breathed heavily, “If I am an angel, then let me rip off my wings and break apart my halo because I have killed!” He shouted, “And I don’t fucking resent it! Not one fucking bit.”
You were silent in shock from his outburst, while George huffed heavily. His heart was racing with adrenaline, but he hated this one. He looked at you who was still in shock, “Is that what an angel is to you?” he asked cynically.
“Someone that kills for the thrill? If I wanted to, I would have killed you that day you walked into the shop, Y/N,” he said. “But I’d rather kill someone else then kill you and Rafa,” He continued with a small voice. You furrowed your eyebrows, “What?”
You snapped out from your state of shock and began to shake your head in confusion, “What the fuck are you talking about, George? You mean to tell me that you killed 7 people because you didn’t want to kill us?”
“Yes, Y/N, that’s exactly what I meant,” He spat, looking at you with a snarl, “Who do you think killed my whole family except Fred?” George started to laugh maniacally, “And I’ve only spared him all this time because he’s my twin brother and I need a partner for my business.”
“You… You killed your family?” You breathed out, horrified. George looked at you and smiled eerily, “Who else?” His expression grimmed. “I’ve always been this, Y/N. A monster; who craves for the thrill of the kill, and the stench of blood, and the screams of pain and burn. That’s who I am, that’s who I truly am.”
“... I never understood love. Not even when I married you. But when Rafa came along, he taught me what love is. He taught me how to love. And when I realized I love you both, I realized that I loved my family too. But in the end,” He chuckled again, “I killed them,” He whispered dreamily. 
There was a shadow of pain in his eyes, you could sense it. When he looked at you, you found the tenderness he always had in his eyes when he looked at you. For a moment, you wondered if he’s really saying the truth; about him being in love with you. Being in love with your family.
“You,” You watched him look away from you for a moment, pursing his lips, “You gave me a happy life. And I forgot what it’s like to kill. You made me into a new man,” He said slowly. There was silence for a while, it was only you and him, staring into each other. But something clicked inside him that caused him to look away. 
He continued in a cold voice, “But I remembered what I did to my family. I remembered how I felt. I loved it, no matter how much guilt weighed on me for years. I loved seeing their terrified faces when I killed them slowly one by one. Mum, Dad, Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ron and, and little Ginny. They’re in my dreams every single day after that, haunting me, taunting me to kill you and Rafa next. Because that’s who I am,” He slowly shook his head, “But I don’t want to.”
His head turned to you, “I don’t want to kill you. I don’t want to kill Rafa. If I ever do, I— I—” He scoffed, his eyes wandering around the table wildly, “I don’t know if I can forgive myself for it.”
“For killing us?”
“No, for enjoying it,” George confessed. You let out a shaky breath, trying your best to digest it right. Looking at you being quite shaken by the truth, George smiled to himself, “This is also why I didn’t want to tell you the truth.”
“What?”
“You’re looking at me like a monster,” He said softly, lips etching that gentle smile you always adored. He sat back down on his seat, his hands playing with the metallic chain that held him down. “I’m not saying that I’m not one, I just feel better when you look at me with love because I’m your husband, not a sick bastard who kills for fun.”
“It feels nice not to be a monster sometimes.” 
“George... “ You didn’t know what else to say, but his name. “T-then… Why did you target former sexual assaulters? A-and why would you record them?” You asked slowly.
George looked at you for a moment, blinked and he only smiled. That’s when you realized that he had put up his walls again. That George who had confessed his love to you, and had confessed his crimes to you was gone, this is The Mad Hatter now. 
“I told you the truth, I answered your questions. I gave you my word, didn’t I?” He spoke, as if nothing happened a few minutes ago. You took a deep breath to recollect yourself again. You felt confused, angry, scared, and everything else.
 But you’re also hurt.
“... But you did kill me, George.” Your words caused him to look up to you. You were looking down on your hands before standing up straight, sighing as you looked at him, “You hurt me, you lied to me, you deceived me, you played me like I’m no less than a rag doll. Even if you didn’t kill me physically, you killed me in there,” You pointed to his chest, slightly scoffing at the tears welling up your eyes.
And the lights went back up again. 
You took a deep breath, pretending everything was fine. “Nott and Zabini will interrogate you. I’m off the case because of you, so I hope you can work with them, and tell them what you just told me,” You said nonchalantly, forcing the lump on your throat to swallow itself back down. 
George chuckled, shaking his head, “Nah, I don’t think I will.” You furrowed your eyebrows, “What?”
At that moment, the door opened and someone came into the room, “This interrogation is over now that I'm here, please leave,” The man said coolly and you widened your eyes as you recognized him instantly as soon as he walked in the room, “...  Fred?”
“Ah, brilliant.”
The glint of mischief in his eyes had returned, and you realized that the two brothers in front of you are up to no good.
“My lawyer’s here.”
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