#I just hate my life so damn much and I want to fuckin die

[jasonsthunderthighs]

Not me goin almost four days without eatin cause I have no money and don't get paid for another week. ☠️

#my stomach says “FEED ME” but I fuckin HATE eatin with a dyin passion #I hate being broke #and the fact that I've only been sleepin for five hours everyday for the past week doesn't really help with anythin #cause insomnia is a bitch even though I'm REALLY tired right now I know I won't be able to sleep #sorry for the rant in the tags #I just hate my life so damn much and I want to fuckin die #Lyn if you see this I'm sorry that I'm not takin care of myself like you would want me to #I need to shut up #shut up G #not DC #not DC related #personal #personal post

[darkdevasofdestruction]

𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓵 𝓝°5 ~ 𝓗𝓾𝓼𝓴𝓮𝓻 𝔁 𝓡𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻

Oh, to be young and in love, in the most romantic era of the notorious 1950s, with one very magical man who never fail to make you swoon with every suave look who offers.

It isn't very often that Husker reminisces his past life - He knows, if he does, he will remember all of the good times, when his heart was gold and trembling with pure emotion - After all, if he recalls the time he was alive, and very much in love, his frozen heart will just shatter to dust once again, with the same infinite anguish he felt once everything was ripped away from his grasp.

A pain so intolerable, that runs so deep - A pain that no amount of alcohol can mend.

He never truly knows whether he wants to remain asleep forever, so that he will never have to face reality again, or if that would be a nightmare, tormenting him for the remaining abyss of eternity...

Or, perhaps he should stay awake, so that memories will stop toppling him over, beginning with a most beautiful reverie, yet always ending with the same night terror he must face every time.

If this is his way of paying for his irredeemable sins, then he is well aware he deserves it, and even more - Yet every smell reminds him of that sweet Chanel N°5 that she used to wear. Every time he closes his eyes, he dreams of the gracious dances he would share with her. Every song he hears, he recalls that angelic voice of hers, and every time he lays abed and stares up at the ceiling, her seraphic visage flashes before him.

"You are drinking again." Angel slumped in one of the stools by the bar, noticing his best friend looking in a far worse state than usual. "Rough day?"

"Rough life." Husk rasped, chugging down a whole bottle of strong spirits.

"Wanna talk about it?" he tried, in vain, to appear sympathetic - The feline demon was far too gone into his own darkness to even think about slurring away his never-ending sorrows.

"I wanna die, that's what I want." he growled, slamming away the bottle into the nearest wall. "Just like this fucking bottle. That's what I fuckin' wanna do - I wanna die, damn it!"

Angel's eyes widened greatly - Yes, life in hell surely was crazy, and especially for demons like the two of them, who sold their souls away because of their own failures, both in life, and now, in hell - But what in the world could it have caused him to get so hopeless that he was unable to fight back the tears glistening in those tortured eyes?

Even someone like him couldn't dare to make light of the situation, or try and crack a joke, let alone taunt or flirt with him. He felt... Pity, for the poor bartender who always listens to others' woes, yet dares naught speak out his own problems.

"Listen... Husk, ergh... I'm not the best at comforting, okay? But... If I can help, you can tell me... And, if not, then... I'll still be here. And maybe try to keep the others away from you. How's that?" Husk didn't quite seem to compute what his friend said, though he robotically nodded his head, as if remote controlled.

Angel remained in that stool for a few hours, watching the winged demon drink bottle after bottle after bottle, yet his sorrows only washed over him tenfold with each shattered glass against a different wall. He wonders what is going through Husk's mind, what he's ruining himself over with each sigh o grip on his fur.

Who would have thought that, of all things possible, Husker's greatest lament was...

"I fucking hate red. Why the fuck are my wings red? Of all the fucking colours in hell, they just had to be red, yeah?" he stammered angrily, pulling at his feathers. "Y'know what? They can't change colour. Tried dyeing 'em, but nothin'. Got so much fuckin' red on me - I wonder if it's Hell's way of punishin' me forever for my fucking sins."

He hates red...? What an odd statement - He truly seems to have a personal vendetta against that colour - But why? It's just a colour, after all, it can do no wrong. "Why... Do you hate red so much...? Angeldust dared to ask.

At first, he was met with a low growl, hostile, yet inoffensive at its core. Then, he heard a most disturbing answer. "That was the colour of my wife's dress when I last went home." Angel's brain shut down completely. To think someone was trusting him with such a vulnerable piece of himself, the very core of their hopelessness, their weakness; In a way, he felt flattered that Husk trusted him so much, yet in another way... He couldn't help but feel borderless pity for his friend. He wishes such a fate to no one... Well, maybe to Valentino.

Angel forced himself to smile softly, placing his hand gingerly over his own, taking away the alcohol from his hand. "What was her name?" Husk looked up with shock, a little startled, right into his dual coloured eyes - He hasn't ever spoken her name out loud, it almost felt like a blasphemy against her purity. Yet... Maybe... "Y/N." he dared whisper.

"Y/N." Angel repeated after him. "A beautiful name for a beautiful lady." Husk nodded his head.

"She was a Princess." he muttered, his sight blurry with tears.

"A Princess? Really? Nobility and all that?" much to his surprise, Husker chuckled.

"Nah, not quite." he rasped. "At heart, she was. Her family was very rich, so she was pampered up. Huge manor, servants, a personal maid, luxury brands, jewellery and perfumes, indulging in any studies and hobbies she liked..."

"How'd you two meet? I don't suppose you were a Prince or something, were you?" Angel tried to joke friendly, encouraging his friend to open up.

"Ha. Far from it." in his hand, a few dices appeared, and he idly played around with them. "I was an ugly dead beat from a working class broken family. Hardly worthy of her attention." he gritted his teeth bitterly. "Got around to finding work at a young age - Gambling, magic, sax player - If I had money to live, anything worked."

"Did you meet at one of your gigs?" Husk nodded his head affirmatively.

"No clue what she saw in me, Angel. She could do so much better." for a split second, he had a dry smirk on his face, before it disappeared again. "I asked her once, what the hell did she see in me - And she said... I played her favourite song. Silly, innit?"

He didn't receive a mocking laugh, much to his surprise - Instead, Angel cooed. He never imagined the jaded demon before him could be so romantic! "What did you play?" Instead of answering, Husk turned around to his bar, and took out another bottle, yet this time, he hummed a familiar tune as he was doing his bartending for two glasses. "Oh, now I get it - You always hum that song when no one's around! I thought you were just bored out of your mind." he let out an amused exhale. "Fly me to the moon... Refined tastes, alright."

"The stars in the sky never sparkles as brightly as those in her eyes when she looked at me." no wonder he never accepted any flirting from anyone - How could anyone match the love he had for Y/N? "If I were a decent man, I'd have told her not to waste her precious time and love on me. Instead, I was a selfish fuck. I stole years of her life... And in the end, I even stole her life. All because I wasn't even half the fucking man I pretended to be."

The conversation soon turned significantly sour. "I was the man - I was supposed to provide for her. Afford all that fucking expensive Chanel N°5, and the Dior dresses, the Chantelle lingerie, and the damn Cartier and Tiffany's jewellery." even someone more modern like Angel knew all those luxury brands, and was even more impressed and shocked that they could so easily afford such high-end items. "I brought her flowers every day and I took her out on brunches every morning, on dates every afternoon, and to soirees every fucking evening. She loved dancing at parties... But I suppose she preferred the moonlight over the chandeliers."

"You must have overworked yourself a bunch to afford all these things. I'm sure she appreciated it." Angel tried to comfort him, earning a nod of agreement.

"She told me she didn't need any gift, except for my presence. Genuine woman, that one. But how could I, in good conscience, go to her parents and ask for her hand in marriage, when I couldn't even afford a half-decent house with a room for each of her hobbies, a drawer for each month outfit, another for her shoes and three more for her bags, jewels and perfumes; and a large flower garden and a fucking rose gazebo and a swan pond with ten different breeds of pedigree dogs." Angel cringed a little, realising the tremendous gap between their living conditions. "I lost myself on the way to greatness. She was making me so euphoric that I just wanted to see her excited every moment of her life. I didn't need to eat or drink, I just needed to see her smile, and I could work again a few more days without rest."

"But then... You collapsed from overworking?" Husker shook his head.

"Worse. I fooled her parents completely, and we planned our wedding." he replied bitterly.

"How is that a bad thing? Isn't the wedding day the happiest day in a couple's life?" Husk sighed, from the deepest part of his soul.

"It was." he said. "I got greedy. I went to loan sharks, took a shit ton of money to make that wedding the most grand event the country saw in a while. Then went on a month-old honey moon around the world." he cursed in a few different languages that Angel couldn't understand, but was sure were some highly offensive and crude words that he would never utter around Y/N. "I don't need to say more, do I?"

Yeah, he needn't continue speaking the descent into madness, alright. Angeldust didn't want to hear that his friend's love story ended up in his soulmate getting murderer by the loan sharks, only for him to end up killing them, and then himself, out of pure rage and sorrow. He didn't want to hear that an innocent woman like Y/N never knew that her husband was broke and took loans, just to try and mimic the lavish lifestyle she grew up with and deserved. He didn't want to hear the broken shriek of anguish, or the streaming river of tears that befell as Husker saw her dead, on the floor, her pearly pink dress dyed a deep crimson from her own blood, and getting even more stained with each strong embrace he held around her shattered body, just like a precious porcelain doll fallen off the shelf.

They only just recently became something akin to 'best friends' from both sides... Yet Angel couldn't bare to hear the tragic end of the story, and he couldn't even begin to imagine the pain he felt, having to live his afterlife as a Sinner, for as long as he has, without the woman he loves by his side.

"It's better this way, I guess. At least she finally got rid of me. Wherever she is, she must be living far better, than with a lying fuck like me who couldn't keep it together." the spider demon frowned, watching his friend slump on the bar counter.

"I don't think that's the case." he spoke vehemently. "I don't believe there is any person, of any kind, treasuring her as much as you did." Husk's ears perked up immediately, twitching lightly. "At least on an emotional way, I'd say, you and Y/N were lucky. There's so many people who never experience the love you had, let alone get to meet and marry their soulmate."

"What the fuck would you know?!" he growled, throwing a bottle at his head, only for the demon to dodge.

"... I wish I had fallen in love too, you know?" Husk gritted his teeth, realising the sensitive wound that he unwillingly stabbed open - But it wasn't his foult - He is hurt! He is in pain! "As a human, as a demon... I was like you, sort of. I was so shit at managing my life, that I ended up falling prey to my vices... I needed more and more, and I couldn't resist. I had no ration or logic. I gave in to my so-called 'friend group' and got addicted to drugs... Couldn't get rid of that addiction even after death... And I clinged on the only demon who could give me what I wanted... And now, I can't escape Val, even if I wanted to turn my life around and live the life that I never could." Angel had a wry smile on his face. "Do you really think a drug addict or the most famous porn star of hell would be able to meet his soulmate, without destroying their life in the process also?"

The two remained silent, only hanging their head and sighing. No matter how happy life can be for some... It will never have a chance of turning around for them. It just couldn't be. They are in hell, after all. Even Charlie won't be able to save them and bring them on the path of redemption, no matter how insanely enthusiastic and cheerful she can be... They were still sure to drown.

Somehow, this few hours of vulnerability brought Husk and Angel closer, and although they won't be speaking about it again, it was clear to the residents of the Hazbin Hotel that the two were as close as two demons can get, without the inclusion of vice or extortion.

Things were going well enough for them, even with the new addition of Sir Pentious, the villain turned... Something? It was still not too bad around the hotel. Though unsure of whatever Charlie's plan was, to fight against the purge from the Angels, they were still there to sort-of support whatever dream the Princess of the Pride Circle has.

That is, until the Hotel opened its doors to a brand new resident, a gorgeous demoness dressed elegantly in a dress of pearly pink, adorned with high quality jewellery, and with her long hair done stylishly, and smelling like a fresh day of Spring. She walked in guided by the Radio Demon, of all people, and she was smiling so demurely, completely unafraid of the fiend next to her, yet still reserved and soft.

"No way, is that Chanel N°5?! How'd you get it in here?!" Angel squealed, fangirling over the flowery perfume - But then, it clicked for him. Didn't Husker mention his wife loving this scent the most?

"Oh, you noticed! I am so happy that there are more sensible people - Erh - Demons with refined tastes!" the girl unfolded her laced fan and giggled behind it demurely.

Although she looked even more regal than even the Princess of Hell herself, as they stood next to each other, there was one particular detail that made the new-comer stand out from any other netizen.

With her hands clasped together over her chest, a bright white gold ring, with a most brilliant zircon was shining brighter than even the moon herself.

Whilst the other demons gathered around the seraphic beauty, wanting to have her attention, and even going as far as to have Alastor speak out about this new lady, Husker's breath stopped completely; His brain was going into overdrive, and his heart, he wanted to rip out of his chest.

That ring... That ring, he knew all to well - After all, he bought it himself, when he proposed to Y/N. That voice, the fashion, the mannerism... Even with altered looks, she looked the same. Even in hell, she looked the same. Even with demonic eyes, she looked the same.

She was the most beautiful woman in the universe.

"Y/N, this is Husker, our bartender." Charlie's face was split open by her overly-cheerful grin. "Husk, won't you introduce yourself to Y/N?"

"I'm not a fucking child. I don't need to introduce myself." the man hissed aggressively. "This is fucking stupid, I'm out." without even realising, he shattered the glass in his grasp, before stomping away into his room.

How could that be? Was this a nightmare? Surely, this must be some impersonator demon or something - There's no way an innocent being like Y/N could possibly have ended up in Hell, with a bunch of Sinners, of all thing. Was this his fault also? Did he bring her down with him to hell? Was he never going to be forgiven for all of the shit he's done in his previous life? Did Alastor bring her to the Hotel, so that he could blackmail him even more? Was his empty soul worth so little, in the end?

He was so afraid - Will Y/N be angry once she realises who he is? He couldn't blame her, obviously, he's earned her scorn... Yet why is his heart hurting so bad? He wishes so badly to jump on her and wrap her in his arms and wrings, and never again let her go. Ah, but he looks like a stupid flying cat... He looks ridiculous. There's no way...

...

Perhaps... She should stay with Al...

He has the influence, the money, the fashion sense, the looks, the freedom and privilege, the elegance...

Alastor has everything, and embodies everything that he could never be.

In life, he was selfish, and he didn't let go of her. Perhaps, the only way to apologise and make up for his sins was to let her be cherished by a man capable of doing what he never could.

As he lay awake on the bed, curled up and cursing his whole existence, wanting to sob until his body was all dried up and shriek until his throat was bleeding raw; he wanted to claw his face to velvety ribbons and drown his lungs with all of his blood... As he was succumbing to his self-hatred and spiraling down into the depths of despair, Y/N decided to end the day with some delicious pastries and an aromatic cup of tea in the garden, with her friend, Alastor.

Y/N was idly playing with her ring, looking at the inscription inside of it. 'Y/N ♡ Husker'. How absolutely adorable, she thought, a beautiful smile gracing her features. "He looks... Different. Are you sure it is the same person, Alastor?" her voice showed nervousness.

"Y/N, Y/N, would I lie to you?" he grinned, as always, sipping from his tea. "You should hear him purr. He truly resembles a little kitten."

Y/N looked up into he friend's eyes, a look of intense surprise and borderline intrigue taking over. "Are you being truthful? He... Purrs?" she gasped, quickly slipping her ring back on her finger.

"Yes, my darling. Unconsciously, someone strokes his fur, he gets so very adorable~." Alastor hums, watching the lady before him being so romantically melancholic over a life long gone. "What did you think about today's meeting?"

Y/N sighed, looking up into the sky. "I feel guilty for enjoying the moment I ripped Velvette apart, yet I feel no remorse for killing her. Such an uncouth and vulgar person has no right to behave with such disrespect towards me." Alastor's grin widened significantly. "And... I cannot wait for the next purge. I want to burn Heaven to cinders. Those hypocrites have grown far too arrogant for their own good, and I believe they need to be taught a harsh lesson."

"I see we are on the same wavelength as always, my dear." the demon sipped from his tea. "I am quite glad those arrogant hypocrites turned you away, for such a silly thing like - Vanity - They say. Beautiful women should be allowed to feel that-a-way, not ostracised for being such jewels for one's eyes." ever the charmer with poison dripping from his tongue. "Before I turn in for the evening, I have a gift for you - For friendship's sake." Y/N rose a suspicious eyebrow, watching as he took out a carefully folded picture from his blazer's pocket, and handing it to her. "I am going for a new fitting with Rosie tomorrow, should you wish to join us for a lovely day of self-care." the girl smiled, nodding her head at him in appreciation. "Have a pleasant evening."

Y/N muttered her pleasantries, and waited for Alastor to leave her sight, before unfolding the picture and bursting to tears. She cradled the precious memory to her heart, and sobbed for as long as her heart needed.

What have they done so wrong to deserve this? They were so happy while alive, so what went wrong? Was her opulent life, the reason for their downfall? Did her beloved think she wouldn't love him, if he couldn't match her family's wealth? Were all soulmates made to be torn apart while at their most blissful?

Still, she was grateful that she wasn't accepted into Heaven, for she would have had a most awful afterlife, as opposed to the many Overlord friends she made since she's been sent to Hell after her gruesome death, and the many favours she received from the Lords and Royals who went to Earth to retrieve items of importance for her.

Drying her tears, Y/N walked back inside the hotel, ready to turn in for the night, only to stop in her tracks as soon as she heard a soft sob, followed by a few very familiar curses in a variety of languages that she knew all too well. Her heart clenched as she stepped cautiously towards the foreign room, eavesdropping for any other sound, only to be met with more muffled cries.

Biting her lip, the demoness knocked on the door, only to be cursed harshly and told to fuck off. Y/N gulped, feeling taken aback by being talked in such a way - Though she immediately composed herself, reminding herself that he, too, is hurting, most likely far more than she is.

She excused herself before opening the door and entering. "What fucking part of 'FUCK OFF' don't you FUCKING UNDERSTA---" Husk was livid, getting in a sitting position as he growled with incredible hostility at the one who dared barge in his bedroom so rudely, only to remain speechless as he realised it was the demoness herself, standing with a sympathetic smile on her face. She also seemed to have been crying prior to this. "Oh. It is you." he cleared his throat, getting back on the bed, unable to face her.

"I have missed you dearly." her voice was so soft, so beautiful, so endearing... "I... Cannot believe that I am seeing you again. It seems to me that, no matter how far apart, our souls will forever traverse oceans of time and space, just to embrace each other once more."

She could hear him sniffling, his nails digging deep into the blanket. "You have always been so romantic and poetic." he grumbled, hiding his face in the pillow. "You shouldn't be here."

"You will have to be more specific, my love." she hummed, moving to sit on the edge of his bed. "Here - In Hell? Or here - In your room? Either way, I would say, I am right where I need to be."

"I don't understand." as if burning with frustration, Husk shot up, looking with self-hatred at the girl. "You did nothing wrong your entire life. You were nothing but a living sunshine. A fucking flower in human form. What the fuck did those angels not agree with, that they cast you to this shit hole?"

"There was a time when you would beat up any man who would curse in my presence." Y/N's adorable giggle made the demon's face flush red. "I am sorry that you are suffering so much, at my expense. I could never repay you for everything you have done for me, while we were alive."

"What the hell are you apologising for anyway? I got you killed, not the other way around - And even if it were that way, it'd've been a blessing in disguise, getting rid of a dead beat worthless fuck like me." he huffed, looking away. "You always were too good for me." the demon had so much to say, so many regrets to yell, so much love to spill... Alas, he remained quiet. "You seemed happy with Al. I wish I could be that, while we were alive." his voice went to soft, it was barely audible. "You should... Stay with him."

"Yes, I am happy being friends with Alastor. He was the one who introduced me to Rosie and Carmilla and Zestial, and I cherish them all dearly, as my like-minded friends." Y/N spoke calmly, reaching her hand to cup her lover's soft cheek. "He also was the one to tell me of your misdemeanours. How you succumbed to your vices; to gambling and alcohol, to the the point that you lost your soul in a deal with him. How pitiful." he was so confused as to where she was trying to get with her words, yet in spite of the anticipation for blames and reproaches, he couldn't help but lean into her warm and gentle touch. "He is the one who helped me become an Overlord, and I took your place. And it is Alastor, and some other friends of mine, who helped retrieve some objects I thought long lost."

"... You still smell like Chanel N°5." his comment made the girl giggle again.

"One of my friends had his little imps go to the human world and rob an entire Chanel store, to bring me all Chanel N°5 perfume bottles." how incredulous, Husk thought, staring at the girl flabbergast, speaking of a clear crime, committed in her name. And then, he started laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of her statement.

"Angel would kill to have a whole room of Chanel N°5." he said, his eyes softening as he put his hand over hers. "Y/N... Knowing that you are doing fine... That you aren't suffering... Or anything that I put you through... It makes me... Content."

"My darling." Y/N called out. "Do you remember the day of our wedding?"

"Of course I do. What's that question?"

With a cheeky grin, she took out the picture from her purse, handing it to her beloved. "Alastor was able to find this. His connections truly are amazing." Husk's eyes were wet with falling tears, and his lips were trembling. "I forgot I had pink roses braided in my hair. I was so busy looking at my handsome husband, that everything around me vanished." Husk's sobbing got even louder. "I wanted to frame this picture first, but I couldn't resist showing it to you first."

"Get out, Y/N! Get out!" his voice was broken and raw, so pained that even her heart shattered. "I am not the man you fell in love with. Why do you think my name is 'Husk'? I am just that - A husk of the man I never was. I am not worth anything. I don't amount to anything. I just gamble money I don't have and drink booze until I pass out. I don't deserve a second chance, and I certainly don't deserve you. I never did. I got you killed, damn it!"

"You think too much, you fool." Y/N cupped his face, bringing him into a gentle kiss - A kiss so loving that it numbed his pain, and hightened his senses, that got his heart pumping again and his lungs screaming for air. "I fell in love with you for good reason, and I intend to remain by your side, loving you." she smiled, wiping his tears with her thumb. "You can try as much as you wish to drive me away, but it will not work. You may succeed in convincing yourself that you are a lesser man, but you cannot do that with me. I know the man before me, and I know I will never leave you."

"Y/N..." the man sniffled, burying his face in her bosom, holding so tightly onto her petite body that he almost feared breaking her.

"There was once a time when you would only call me 'Sweety'." her honeyed giggle sounded so teasing, yet it didn't embarrass him. It served only to make him chuckle.

"There was also a time when I would only call you 'Chanel', if you recall." it almost felt as though they were both alive, and during their honey moon, without a single care in the world, and living a most carefree life.

"That does bring back some very amusing memories." Husk hummed in agreement, feeling melancholic, despite the intense joy surging through his body. Perhaps it was due to the unfamiliarity of this positive feeling, that he felt exhausted, or maybe from his excessive crying and whining. Regardless, he wanted nothing more than to cuddle up in his wife's arms, and never leave this blasted room ever again.

"Can you promise me something?" the man asked. "I am selfish still - Even more so as a demon. I am nothing but filth. I didn't deserve you then, and I deserve you even less now. Still... Now that you're here... I can't let you go again. So..."

Though he found himself eating his words, Y/N only smiled, laying down on the bed and taking him down with her, nestling him comfortably into her loving embrace. "Alastor said you purr like a kitten. I would love to hear that, tonight." she hummed, hearing his annoyed snarl. "And every night going forward, for as long as we may live in this afterlife we have." Husk's body became stiff, frozen with shock. "That is what you wanted me to promise, isn't it? That I will never leave you." he didn't respond. "It is within our wedding vows, silly. There is no way I would walk away, after I have just found my soulmate."

"... Even though I look like... This? And I am irredeemably addicted to gambling and drinking, even more so than before... And I have lost my soul to the Radio Demon? I am stuck doing his bidding for eternity... And..." Y/N only hugged him closer.

"No matter what, in sickness and in death, you and I will still be soulbound." his small body was softly trembling with emotion. "I've got you, my darling. Worry not about anything. I have got you." she remained silent for a little while. "But, Husk..." her voice sounded so distant, so... Melancholic. "Do you... Still like me? The way you did before?"

Startled by her words, Husker jolted up, looking at the pitiful visage of his lover. "What... What do you mean...?"

"My skin is pure white, with no colour, except for my make up. My eyes are black where they should be white, and the worst carmine red, where they should be embodying the aspect of nature. Even my hair looks to be an abnormal colour, and no matter how much I try to dye it, it will not retain its original shade." she gulped, looking away from him. "Any shred of normalcy that I have... Is so tiresome, so much work to keep up, the princessy facade that I used to have, that I used to love... That you used to love..." she sighed softly. "Yet even that completely dissolves as soon as I transform in the monstrous form that I fight so hard to keep veiled from the world."

"Y/N." he caressed her soft face, only to notice small particles of powder latching onto his fur. "I'm a fucking furry mammal with wings. I look like a children's plush toy or somethin'. Meanwhile, you look as doll-like as always, and you're afraid I wouldn't like you anymore? How silly." he sighed, leaning to place a kiss on her forehead. For a few seconds, he stopped to ponder over a rather bold move, and in a split second, he retrieved a wooden box from under his bed. "This is my secret. Nobody has to know about this." he spoke, a rosy tint on his cheeks. "Open it."

Carefully, the girl did as instructed, revealing the content of the box. A bunch of letters were preserved there, all of them neatly placed and handwritten with black ink. "Husk..." Y/N felt the air in her lungs dissipating, as she realised all those letters were recreating the exchange of love words from their time alive. "H-How...?"

"I have all our letters memorised." he chuckled lightly. "I... Needed some way of keeping you close... Of remembering you. I am shit at drawing, but I have a good enough memory... So this was the only way of preserving what we had."

"It's been so long... And yet, you... You still remember... All of it? There must be tens, if not, hundreds of them... How...?" the girl was flabbergast, yet melting completely.

"I read them every night before sleep, when alive, and I read them every night now also." those precious teardrop diamonds caressing her cheeks falling down so gracefully.

𝐼 𝓃𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇 𝓀𝓃𝑒𝓌 𝒶𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓅𝒾𝓃𝑒𝓈𝓈; 𝐼 𝒹𝒾𝒹𝓃’𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝓀 𝒹𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓂𝓈 𝒸𝒶𝓂𝑒 𝓉𝓇𝓊𝑒; 𝐼 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹𝓃’𝓉 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝒷𝑒𝓁𝒾𝑒𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒, 𝒰𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓁 𝐼 𝒻𝒾𝓃𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝓂𝑒𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊.

His usual raspy voice sounded so romantic as he recited the love poem he wrote to her. A voice that he only reserved for her. A voice that only she would ever know.

𝐸𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓎 𝒹𝒶𝓎 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒𝓈 𝓂𝑒 𝒶 𝓉𝒽𝓇𝒾𝓁𝓁; 𝒜𝓁𝓁 𝓂𝓎 𝒹𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓂𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓇𝒾𝒸𝒽𝓁𝓎 𝒻𝓊𝓁𝒻𝒾𝓁𝓁. 𝐼'𝓂 𝒶 𝒻𝑜𝑜𝓁 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓇𝓂𝓈; 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒷𝑒𝓁𝑜𝓃𝑔 𝒾𝓃 𝓂𝓎 𝒶𝓇𝓂𝓈; 𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝓂𝑒; 𝓅𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓈𝑒 𝓈𝒶𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁.

A love so pure and true, bottomless and without boundaries; Husker himself forgot just how endless his emotions could run. He thought himself jaded and cold, having lost his own heart, the second he lost her... Yet now... Perhaps it wasn't as bad as he first thought. Perhaps... Even someone like himself deserves some kind of redemption.

𝐻𝑜𝓁𝒹𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒽𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓂𝓈 𝓂𝓎 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝒾𝓉𝓈 𝒸𝑜𝓇𝑒. 𝐼𝓉’𝓈 𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝒾𝓂𝒶𝑔𝒾𝓃𝑒 𝐻𝑜𝓌 𝐼 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓂𝑜𝓇𝑒.

Without her, he wasn't whole. Without her, he is not himself. Without her, he is empty. Without her, his whole life falls apart. Without her, he is nothing but a worthless deadbeat.

𝒥𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝓁𝑜𝑜𝓀𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒶𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒢𝒾𝓋𝑒𝓈 𝓂𝑒 𝒶 𝓉𝒽𝓇𝒾𝓁𝓁. 𝐼 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓃𝑜𝓌, 𝒜𝓃𝒹 𝐼 𝒶𝓁𝓌𝒶𝓎𝓈 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁.

But now, he is not alone anymore - Well, perhaps he never was to begin with, considering he still had Angel and Charlie, to some extent, yet nothing can compare to sweet Y/N's existence by his side. Nothing can heal his aching soul, or revert the damage he did to himself throughout life and afterlife, the way her love for him did.

♡ ~𝓘 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾, 𝓶𝔂 𝓼𝔀𝓮𝓮𝓽 𝓟𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓼𝓼~♡

#hazbin hotel #hazbin angel dust #hazbin alastor #hazbin charlie #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin husk #husker #hazbin husker #husker x reader #husker imagine #hazbin hotel husk x reader #hazbin hotel husker imagine #charlotte morningstar #hazbin vaggie #Hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel imagine

[carebeartherese]

My live reactions to Loki ep 4:

(Already 7 mins in and I’m angry with Kang)

-hell yea the clock lady wants you (what the fuck)

-mobius and Loki are very boyfriends rn

-shit the loom

-LOKI LOOKED AT MOBIUS’ HAND

-sorry

-I love this Victor timely fella tbh

-oh fuck dox

-B15 my love <333

-no don’t let dox live

-oooooo words

-Víctor is so autism

-ob and Casey <3333

-ob and victor meeting each others idles

-snake eating it’s own tail= Ouroboros

-FANGIRLING

-CASEY JEALOUS??

-mobius is so sweet

-NOT THE BIGASS SUIT THING AGAIN POOR MOBIUS

-lmfao petty ob

-hahahahah VOLUNTEER LOKI

-skin?

-mobius and Loki fighting like an old couple is my favorite

-Sylvie = third wheel

-Loki is in fact super fast

-ooop victor is think

-Casey and ob are so bf coded

-CASEY IS THE OTHER WOMAN NOW

-PIE DATE 2???

-sylvie pls let them be a couple

-dude this bitch

-CALLING OUT MOBIUS FR

-HE HASNT LOOKED CAUSE HE LOVES LOKI HE WANTS TO STAY WITH HIM

-MOBIUS AND SYLVIE FACING OFF WHILE LOKI STANDS IN THE BACKGROUND IS ACTUALLY PEAK CINEMA

-WHO WILL HE CHOOSE

-pie pls

-LOKI YOU CHOSE HER???

-oh brad

-shit

-please don’t start a prison riot

-don’t bring Galileo into this

-Stfu dox

-uhhhh this tension is strange

-B15 !!!!!!

-brad doing the same hand-resting thing with his collar

-PIE TIME

-wait sylvie gtfo

-ohhhh please let them fight about MOBIUS

-Loki monologue incoming

-lmfao Thor mocking

-also Loki character development???

-yea those people live because of his lover

-damn wise words ig

-I don’t like them as a couple please don’t let this happen again

-yea sylvie thats kinda the point of hope

-i don’t hate her she’s just annoying on occasion

-anyways

-ok but you are gods tho

-thx Loki also back tf up

-MOVE ON /SRS

-damn that pie room is the real star or the show

-fuck dox srsly

-NO NO RAVONNA STOP

-also crazy bitch Ms minutes honorable mention

-SHES WORKING ON HERSELF OK

-oh shit life on the timeline?? Fr???

-oh fuck no you crazy bitches

-WHAT ARE THEY DOING

-BRAD NO

-FUCK DONT SQUISH THEM

-NO PLEASE OMFG RAVONNA

-MS MINUTES WHY ARE YOU PSYCHOTIC

-Brad that was fuckin cold

-see even ravonna doesn’t actually give a fuck who you are brad

-Casey x OB x Timely???

-It’s hotchoc victor

-I love victor

-mobius is so supportive

-what’s happening with the tempads tho???

-oh sorry b15 it’s people goo now

-MS MINUTES STOP THIS AINT SUPPOSED TO BE HORROR

-Aw he made the guard hot coco

-OH FUCK

-BRAD WHAT THE HELL YOU CUNT

-IT WAS SO WHOLESOME UNTIL YOU SHOWED UP

-MOBIUS AND VIRUSES LMFAO

-shit Ms minutes

-stawp

-loki and mobius need more screen time together

-this feels much scarier than it should tbh

-ohhh….hey ravonna….sorry about all that

-oh shit ok

-mommy? Sorry, mommy? Sorry-

-brad please relax with your 70s hair

-TIMELY DONT BE A DICK PLS

-RUN LOKI RUN

-oh fuck this is it ig

-real Ms minutes sucks

-shits getting real

-loki is gonna get pruned by himself

-sylvie constantly plays elevator music in her soul

-this is where Loki gets pruned!!!! Probably by himself

-yup I was right prune yourself

-damn sylvie strong

-good job loki???

-sorry just had to kill past me rq

-WHOS calling???

-and th e call was coming from IsIdE tHe HoUsE

-oh dammit ob you scared me

-mobius is so worried about his boyfriend he’s willing to reboot the whole system

-LET THE LOKIS USE THEIR POWERS SRSLY

-BYE MS MINUTES

-Aw poor timely they aren’t mocking you

-OH SHIT

-you’ll never be him.

-that shit was menacing fr

-oh DONT send brad out on his own!!!

-he gonna die

-fuck that was kinda hot ngl

-anyways hi sylvie/brad

-FUCK YEA SCREW YOU RAVONNA

-lokius has had way too few scenes today

-loki <333

-oh thank god

-OH THERE IS NO GOD

-THE LOOM

-oh loki please be safe

-don’t send timely out pls

-no dont!!!

-TIMELY PLS DONT DIE

-OH SHIT BLACK HOLE SPAGHETTI

-NO TIMELY PLEASE

-GOD HOW FIX PLS

-NO BAD LOKI

-STAY PUT PLEASE

-DUDE

-THIS SHIT IS TERRIFYING

-B15 MY LOVE

-OH FUCK WHY IS IT DARK

-WHAT THE HELL WHAT JUST HAPPENED

-THAT IS AN UNFAIR CLIFFHANGER

-COME BACK

#loki #loki episode 4 #loki season 2 #victor timely #mobius m mobius #ms minutes #ravonna renslayer #sylvie laufeydottir #loki laufeyson #lokius

[throwingmetothelions]

It’s so important that you read this disclaimer/TWs. I am a southern woman and I will be until I die. When I was a CW major for a decade almost all I wrote were southern gothic pieces, and this does not read like any fic I’ve posted here. This is very much Auntie V’s old writing style. I am taking you to my roots. The other main character in this piece is black. This is your one reminder that I am a black woman. Don’t start no shit - won’t be no shit in terms of my descriptions. Second - I really kinda put a spotlight on Noah at his lowest as far as my writing goes in the beginning. There are a few potentially triggering mental health allusions; some regarding hygiene, and I just wanted to make sure you understand that you aren’t alone. TW: Religious talk, mental health decline, one singular mention of a baby dying with no details, blood mentioned right after that. Oral sex f receiving, D/S dynamic if you squint. I would actually go as far as to say there's a smatter of angst up in this bitch. Supernatural shit. Noah kinda spirals toward the end and slips into madness. Absolute smut because it's me and I have never written anything else here. Let’s get spooky. WC: 6k (I chopped it a lil bit so that’s why it’s all one) 

NoahxOC? Is she really my OC? You be the judge.

It’s been exactly three hours and forty-one minutes since Noah decided that if that one dude in Pirates of The Caribbean could become one with the ship, he could become one with his mattress. No coral or sea stars to adorn him for the rest of his ever, just sweat and a little bit of deodorant, but nothing pretty. Thinks maybe he’ll turn to dust or something easily sweepable. No words and barely breathing. Continues inhaling the smell of incense he didn't light, and swallowing down saliva and self pity. Continues laying. Wallowing. Hits the play button on his memory bank and lets the hate scroll behind his purpling eyelids. 

“It’s all autotune”.

“He was so shaky at the Cleveland show dude idk”.

“They started all that mysterious bullshit with the masks and the no socials and his vocals went to shit immediately. Fuckin’ wild”.

“Noah needs to let Jolly just …” 

A well aimed throw from Nicholas ends with a pen hitting Noah in the middle of his back. “Snap the fuck out of it dawg. Since when have you listened to what people say about your singing? It ain’t true and you know damn well I’d tell you if it was,” Nick sighed as he leaned his acoustic against the desk. There isn’t much to say here. Nicholas has been there, albeit never there in the physical sense of not bathing for over a week and ignoring his best friend’s phone calls until the aforementioned friend threatened him with a welfare check from either him, or the cops. 

People often forget that “blood is thicker than water” is a bastardized phrase. “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb,” but it is not thicker than the knots that Nick spent an hour combing from Noah’s matted locks after he threw him in the shower and helped him scrub yesterday. Do not speak to Nicholas Ryan about that fucking covenant. He wrote the anthology and dedicated it to Noah long ago. 

“Remember the story your grandma used to tell us when we were younger? Robert Johnson? Maybe you can just sell your soul to a demon and bam. Never miss a note again in your life,” he pokes the last vowel into Noah’s kneecap as he tries to lift the soggy and molded blanket of depression off of that moment. Off of his best bud. “I’m telling you bro, it’s - it’s real. I feel like it really happened,” Nicholas cuts his eyes to Noah for a split second before continuing to thumb the strings of his guitar.

“You also felt like you had Covid that one time, but it was just the jalapenos on that sandwich fucking with your tastebuds so …" Noah dismisses Nick’s 2 AM Red Bull fueled theories and rolls over on the bed to face him. “Besides. If that shit was true I would have done it ages ago,” he chuckles a little bit, and the clearing in his throat reminds him that he hasn’t done that in awhile. 

—---

I ain't goin’ to state no color 

“The lynch mobs ran his family outta town when he was a boy. Been a travellin’ man against his will his whole life. Learned to play in a dark graveyard, though the dead can hear like us”. 

But her front teeth is crowned in gold

“Went by many names, Robert did. Women and whiskey stole his soul long before he sold it to the devil at them crossroads. Only a beast would howl the blues like that”.

She got a mortgage on my body

“His wife and baby died bloody and hollerin’. They wouldn’t let him see the child that lived for that. Your loved ones are never spared from your debts, child”. 

And a lien on my soul

“He was poisoned like a field mouse in a corner basement. Ulcers in his throat where the demons took their chords back one by one. May death be kinder now.” 

—---

Noah shudders at the mental reel of his grandmother spinning that story from her recliner like a textile through her vein-blued fingers. He doesn’t hold on to many memories of her, and knowing that Nicholas is holding them for him settles in his gut like concrete blocks on the ocean floor. May death be kinder now.

“I think it works anywhere too. Johnson held up a guitar at the crossroad and the devil just popped up. I believe in you,” Nicholas whispered the last sentence while catching Noah’s knuckles with the flat of his palm. “I’m going to bed dude. Taking the couch because if you kick that one spot on my shin again I won’t be responsible for my actions,” he bites through a yawn as he drags himself over to the couch by the door. The unspoken knowledge that he would just be there until Noah was Noah again laid itself over the pair along with the dark as the LEDs timer faded out. 

—---

The alarm on his phone vibrated under Noah’s pillow an hour later. 

Gently kicking the blanket off of his body, he turned it off and put the flashlight on the lowest possible brightness. Through the white haze he could make out Nick’s chest as it swelled and fell with quiet breaths. No snores to give away his slumber, but his cracked mouth and the arm hanging down to the carpet told Noah that he was knocked, so his plan was still greenlit. 

Listen. If anyone asked Noah - yeah, it was a weird fucking time to be taking a walk, but his mental health was in the fucking gutter and he’d happily have his band mates vouch for that if he got into trouble. A 3:30 AM walk was better than no walk at all. Fresh air was better than the stale and dust-littered cloud that hung in his bedroom that he’d been choking on for god knows how long. Stretching his arms into his faded navy hoodie (no shirt because they were all in desperate need of some laundry detergent and some scrubbing) and stepping into some gray joggers, Noah gently padded across the floor and thanked some God that the door was cracked already. He patted his pockets: phone, knife, lighter, cigs, keys. He popped his feet into some slides, opened the front door, and Noah Sebastian took off into a humid Appalachian night. 

The stars looked something like crumbs swept from a placemat in their scattering. 

Fireflies peeked through bushes like sun does clouds, and they swirled the same.

Noah thinks thoughts that adults would. This new asphalt they paved looks great. Glad the holes are gone. Anything to keep his brain moving. Not stuck. It’s kinda hot for this time of year. I guess August is still considered summer, though.

See, the rollercoaster of fame was something Noah had been standing in line for since he was 13. He’d been growing and stretching and waiting his turn, but he hadn’t anticipated the steep incline to success. All the eyes were on him all the time, and the urge to spread them around and give them to his bandmates had never been stronger. He thought he wanted this, but the critics came on strong and took the form of delusional children on the internet wavelengths from reality. He felt like shit because, at this point, his arch nemesis was probably a twelve year old that had never seen a concert and he was the grown man assclown that let it get to him. 

Noah had been bracing himself for the inevitable drop that must come, but the only thing he knew for certain was that he absolutely couldn’t handle it. If it all came speeding down and stopped with screeching brakes and smokey sparks, he wouldn’t be the one in control and going off the rails with it all seemed like his only out.

Shaking his head from the fog, he noticed that the jagged white line of paint on the side of the road seemed to fade out. He pins it on a bit of “lazy painters” and a lot of “not my fuckin problem”.

Keep walking. 

His complaint about the heat must have been heard by some alien brainworm because he’s suddenly quite grateful for the hoodie and the breeze that rummages through the leaves like a searching hand in a kitchen drawer. Feels good. 

Keep walking.

The cicadas had stopped screeching. The noise, akin to a violin being played after all of its strings have broken, was gone. Maybe all things must sleep. Maybe they got picked up by an owl. May death be kinder now. Head down. Hood up.

Keep walking. 

Head up. Hood down.

There is no dot of red inside a white paint can, there is no water droplet in an inferno, and Noah is certain that there is no fucking desert in the middle of Richmond, Virginia. 

And yet. 

He finds himself staring out at nothing. There is sand, and clay, something red and dusty and on the horizon there is nothing. Noah whips his head backward and sees the same scene behind him. The road was narrow now, and there was another narrow road of black going straight through it a few feet in front of him. No street signs. Nothing. He rubbed his eyes with his palms as one would if they were waking up from a bad dream, but when his lids opened again he found that nothing changed. Same dirty slides, same clothes, same desert of nothing. Noah walked forward. His steps felt real, and his stomach immediately started to ache. He remembered the story. Remembered the absolute conviction and strength in his grandmother’s voice and teeth when she told him that the crossroads come to you when you need them the most. 

She pointed her finger at him in a way that Southern women do when she told him that praying and practicing, Jesus and magic, and your footpath and your heart’s blood compass could all align somewhere in this world. “All the trees aint your friends, and they keep their secrets in the Spanish moss”.

 Noah grew up on gravel, backwoods revivals, and a fear of God that was overcome through alcohol fueled tears and some screams ripped from his chest by the man himself. Maybe God took a rib as payment, and maybe he yelled like Adam. He didn’t have long to think, because the tornado of realization and helplessness took him down to his knees. The blacktop dug into his skin as he threw his head back. Noah didn’t know what he was feeling, but he had accepted some sort of … fate? Was it fate? Did he deserve whatever was about to happen, and what did he do? Why did it seem like this road was lit up by stadium lights that he couldn't see? Questions on questions, so he closes his eyes once more, places his palms on the tops of his thighs, leans his head back so the ends of his hair brush his heels, and he parts his lips.Tries to breathe. He did not repent in his last moments, but there were pictures floating of Jolly, Nicholas, Nick, and there were late nights and popsicles and beer cans and being young and dying young and that’s all very okay. Noah’s life was okay. May death be kinder now. 

All of a sudden, Noah felt two slender fingers slip past his lips, glide over his tongue, and purposefully gag the shit out of him. He felt cold rings catch behind his front teeth as the owner tried to wrench the fingers back from the wet of his mouth. His eyes flew open with immediate tears as he sputtered and coughed - the fit his reflexes threw landed him on his ass with one arm bracing himself. He hums and spits and jerks his head back and forth. His nose burns now. 

“What the fuck,” he yells as he glares up. Noah catches a glimpse of the veins in his hand as they pop and flare under his tense skin. 

“That’s a naughty word, boy,” the figure blew smoke from its mouth with every word effectively stopping Noah from seeing it clearly. It threw the cigarette to the side and cocked its head. “Try ya words again,” it spoke slowly. 

With the smoke haze gone, Noah got a better look at what he was sharing this space with. If he wasn’t already on the ground he might have been sent there again. His eyes started from the ground up, and they turned around and went down from her head again so no detail would be missed.

She was at least six feet tall. She stood barefoot, toes painted honeycomb yellow and some symbols tattooed on the tops of her feet. Gold anklets, bangles, and various types of black cord wrapped each ankle. Her legs were long and brown like cattails, and they spoke to unearthly strength as she stood flat footed. 

Noah couldn’t stop himself from memorizing the way the stretch marks on her exposed hips moved like sawgrass on a marsh plain when she shifted her weight. She wore a tattered skirt made of dull black leather and some other sort of hide. Her stomach pudged over the sides of her skirt, and he saw the same symbols her feet carried spread across it. Her chest was hidden by a bandeau made of the same black leathery material, but Noah caught the curve and fall of her tits and committed them to memory immediately. Her skin was the color of cassava and it held a sparkle. It could have been a sheen of sweat or something ethereal. Her arms ended in hands that held scars, a black hobo bag, and the same tattoos. Her fingertips were ink black, and her fingernails were short, and the same goldish yellow as her toes. Golden rings covered in ash and gems clung tightly to her digits, and her hair was piled high on her head; a beehive weaved of black locs adorned with glittering beads and small animal bones that hung and fell with the breeze surrounding them. Noah still swears he saw a Carolina wolf spider crawl around one. Her face. Her face was composed of freckled cheeks, sharp eyes the color of pitch, and that same mysterious tattooed symbol on the bridge of her nose. The plumped two-toned lips she had curled into a smile and revealed the gold capped fangs on her canines. A forked tongue shot out and licked over one, and he couldn’t help but assume it was some sort of warning. 

“Try ya words. Again,” she spoke. 

“This shit can’t be real,” Noah mumbled as he leaned his forehead on the palm of his hand. “Who are you and what the fuck is going on?”

She chuckled and shook her head at him, her necklaces rattled as she explained, “I am … well, the humans call me a few names. I know who you are though, Noah,” she sneered again as his pupils blew open. 

At this point, he was ready to swing on whatever the fuck this thing was. She was a deadly brand of unconventional gorgeous that brought the fog right back to his brainspace, but he’d convinced himself that it wasn’t considered hitting a girl if that girl was some ancient all knowing being.

“They call me ‘The Tempter,’ ‘The Accuser,’ ‘Belial,’ ‘Satan,’ among others. I’ve never been one for formalities, love. Call me Luci. I am the one that they presumably told you to fear,” she said as she knelt down to Noah’s eye level. “... boo,” her fingers wiggled around her face as small flames erupted from the tips.

“You’re - you’re the …” he stuttered as if he’d been backhanded.

“The …” her eyebrows raised with the octave of her voice.

“The fucking devil? I’m gonna pass the fuck out. This isn’t … you’re not real. You’re not real. This isn’t fucking real,” Noah rose to his feet from shaking knees. Every childhood Sunday was spent under a weather-beaten willow tree memorizing historic ways to shame the devil. To shame her. There was no pulling him out of this dream state, though he wished to hell and back that Nicholas would. He was sure his body should be flailing if it was still on the bed at all. Surely Nick could hear the curdling screams he was trying to emit. 

Luci brought a hand to Noah’s now tear streaked face, black smoke rising around them in billows. “Nicholas is - he is not going to make this decision for you. There’s nothing to be saved from because you’re not dreaming. I think you know why I’m here Noah. I know what it feels like to fall from grace, and I can pull you back from that ledge. You have somethin’ that I need, and it’s just a snap of the fingers,” she delivered a gleaming half smile and a raised eyebrow.   

Was his soul that valuable? And why did the preachers leave out that the devil watches people like some sort of demonic pervert? Was she just a demonic pervert? 

“I resent that,” she frowns over at him. “Trying to stop me from reading your thoughts is kinda   dumb. Blueberry muffins, Pepsi, fuzzy blankets … grass flip flops?” 

Noah decided that if he talked words with his mouth that his brain wouldn’t think too hard. Maybe. He’d accepted death twice that night already, and his music was his reason for breathing. Figured if his music career advanced, if he won, and he took the boys with him that … well, that all of his important things would be safe. No one could harm them. Call it selfish and narcissistic, but he felt that there was quite literally nothing on this mortal coil that he would be afraid to lose aside from them. As painful as it hit him, this wasn’t the first time he’d thought about this so there was no split second decision here. “So … what do I have to do to keep from falling? Like … to keep the fame?” 

Luci wasn’t taken aback at how expeditious he was with his decision. She’d been tasting the drive and hunger that he held in his chest for years through the atmospheric ether, and she craved it. He was so much more powerful than he would ever know, and she cursed his maker for the insecurities he plagued him with. They were insecurities that Noah thought she’d caused for a long time, and it couldn’t have been further from the truth. She was never the harbinger of the dark that nestled in his ligaments. “It’s not the way you think. It’s a bit more … personal and up close,” she mused as they looked each other dead in the eye - crow’s feather black to cracked chestnut brown. Luci reached a hand out and placed it on Noah’s flushed cheek. “Now,” she licked his pulse point, “I will give, and you will do the taking. I will speak, and you listen,” her voice flows out with another puff of smoke, and the smell of burning pine straw floats between them.

Noah mentally thumbs through the brain file labeled “Dumb As Fuck Things That Nick Folio Said While High,” and his mind pulls the page titled “Fear Boners,” to reference his current state. The devil was always shown as hot, but the realization that she was a leather-wearing tribal goddess that could kill him with a singular blink was a lot. May death be kinder now. This information was apparently well received by his conscience, and his cock.

Noah swears he feels her jagged fingernails carve a home in the nape of his neck, but her hands remain on her curved hips. He can make out whips and whirls of some sort of mist floating around her fingers. He feels his sweat dampened lips part open as the pressure around his throat increases and her stance stays the same. Unwavering and violently sure of herself, Luci relaxes the hold and speaks.

“Take it off,” she doesn’t ask. The devil doesn’t ask when she can smell how desperate someone is for her unholy helping hands. 

He makes quick work of throwing his hoodie to the eastern wind, and he had a hand in the band of his sweatpants before it stopped him. It - that misty glitter magic she was using … “The Force,” or whatever the shit from Star Wars was. Is she where they got the idea for - regardless. Luci’s magic brought his hand to a halt. 

She lifted her foot up and tapped the asphalt they stood on, her bangles gently clattering. The hard surface of black grit became a softer patch of Kentucky bluegrass; green, lush, and dew sprinkled. Luci walked behind Noah and let her hands wander down his torso. She stopped to pluck at his already hardened nipple, and the goosebumps Noah had been pricked with seemed to multiply. 

Her fingertips danced over the happy trail Noah was suddenly made well aware that he had. The feeling of her magic and the warm southern breeze twirling through the light hairs there told Noah that she might break him, and that he would beg for nothing less. “That’s a good portrait of Grim,” Luci quips as she moves to kneel at Noah’s feet, “we go way back,” her golden fangs scrape the tattoo that spreads across Noah’s torso. 

“Fuck yes,” he groans as his hips buck up at nothing. 

Luci drags his pants down his legs slowly, just enough to let the band catch on the head of his dick before letting his cock spring up to smack against his stomach. She wanted to hear that hiss she knew Noah kept under his tongue. “Tell ya what,” her forked tongue darted out to catch the small pearl of precum that had gathered at Noah’s untouched tip, “I’m gonna have my fun, and you’re gonna let me know why you deserve to be up at the tippity-top where the angels play, hmm?”

She rose to her feet and met Noah’s eyes again. One finger underneath his chin, the smell of the pine straw again, and the gathering mist were enough to bring his mouth forward and onto hers. He moaned so deeply it would have been some type of embarrassing if he was anywhere else, but the feeling of sucking in her plump bottom lip and licking over her teasing tongue with his own was sending Noah to a different plane of feel-good. 

Luci pulled away before she snapped her fingers and brought about a chair from some other universe. Nothing remarkable about it, Noah thinks, just plain brown wood. It looked like the broken seats that he’d seen off to the side of his grandma’s kitchen. No use sitting on it - those seats were for old newspapers and grocery bags and not the devil, but what the hell did he know? “Ya mouth may not always sing perfect, but you can come show me what else it can do,” she crooked a finger at him and pulled him over and to his knees in front of her. She sat in the chair and with a dismissive wave of her hand, her skirt caught the wind. Luci leaned back and spread her thighs open. 

Noah knelt in a way that said that no object forged by man would keep his body down, and levitating up to her spread before him would be the only honorable end to this. May death be kinder now. He took in the glistening lips, the way the brown gave way to the pink of her core, and the way that his tongue felt magnetized to that spot. “Looks like honey,” he mumbled as wrapped an arm under each thigh and pulled Luci to the edge of her seat. Noah brought his mouth about two inches away from her cunt. He took in the dark patch of curls above her slit, the way that they faded where her puffy lips started, and the way that he knew he’d have to work to get to the heart of her. 

Luci reached a hand down and used her middle and index fingers to spread herself further. Gathering a string of slick, she dangled it above Noah’s now open mouth and like a traveler finding water in the Atacama he took it down with a groan. Tasted like honey and something dark. “Come talk to her. Tell her why you deserve it all,” Luci threads her hand through Noah’s hair and beckons him forward with a tug. 

The tip of Noah’s tongue applies so little pressure that you wouldn’t have known he made contact with her folds if she hadn’t arched her back off the chair. “I uhm. I think I deserve it because,” he pauses to give her clit a kiss, savoring the way that her bud fit perfectly between his pursed lips, “because I know I've given this all that I have to give. I’ve already given it my heart and soul,” he licks around it in a wide circle before stopping his sentence with one more peck. 

“Keep going,” Luci mumbles as she lets her head roll back. Her locs fell around her as she let him worship her pussy. Feminine power brought the best of these mortal men to their knees, and she was not new to this. What she wasn’t prepared for was the stark smell of his yearning. This one didn’t just want to trade his soul for fame like the rest. A few touches below the belt and they were too bound by greed to be of any use at all. Luci couldn’t smell the green of that greed at all. Not just brimstone and hot guilt … he was all jasmine and cold water, moonbeams and sawgrass. Noah smelled like all he wanted to do was stay down on his knees with his lips on her lips, and it made her veins swell. She was losing her grip on her own magic, and bowing to the mercy of his. 

“And I think that the world needs to hear my voice,” Noah sucked one of her lips into his mouth and softly pulled while she pushed his face further into her pussy. His hands gathered as much of her ample thighs as they could, and his fingertips pressed into the muscles until small circles formed. Anything to ground himself and keep him from floating up to the wispy clouds where his head already was. “And I think that I’m multi-talented. I write and produce my own shit ya know,” he brings her throbbing clit back between his lips, starts a slow suckling pace, and moans from the back of his throat. Noah’s eyes close, and the only thing that changes his rhythm is Luci’s bucking. 

She brings her feet up from the grass to the rungs on the bottom of the chair and uses the leverage to lift her ass off the seat a bit. “Yes. Lick that fucking pussy,” she grits from behind clenched teeth as she brings both hands to his head and grinds her hips into his busy mouth. She was gone. The feeling of Noah working over her pussy with an expertise only found before in the mouths of gods was all but too much. “You're gonna make me cum on that tongue. Please make me cum on your tongue,” Luci feels the muscles in her upper back flex as she continues the filthy pace she’s set against his face.

Noah can feel her wetness spreading across his cheeks and down his chin as she does so. He knows he could drown in it, and he left the graceful art of giving two fucks back at home. This entire time he’s been ignoring the ache in his dick - scared that, at this point, he might be so hard that it would literally hurt to touch. In another universe, if this was some sort of sleep paralysis episode, he knew he’d wake up covered in his own dried cum. Wondered if he’d wake Nick up with the moans because he was probably humping the mattress, or fucking against the blanket. 

Noah didn’t have to beg for her orgasm with his words. The burn in his bent knees, the panting breath he hadn’t been able to catch since her juices hit his lips, and the act of accepting of a distinguished death by drowning screamed at her - yelled with all their might to flood plains in the way that monsoons do. 

Luci braced herself with one hand on the back of his head, and one hand gripping the side of the chair with such force the wood splintered. She came with a hard roll of her hips and a cry that could have stretched from one asteroid to another - wide and ringing. She thinks, for sure, that she obtained some humanity through it all. She offered Noah communion in a new way, and let him thank her for the gifts in a sense. Blood and body. May death be kinder now.

Noah never let her thighs go, but he traded his grounding grip for patterns rubbed in softly by satisfied hands. “I’m not saying I thought about it before, but the movies ain’t got shit on this”, Noah licked the inner crease of her thigh with a restless tongue and delighted in the jolt. He watched her regain her breath and thought about how, no matter the outcome, the power trip he’d just taken wouldn’t be matched. He, Noah Sebastian Davis, had made the devil herself fall apart underneath him. He was a force of nature that wasn’t to be questioned. He was the fucking king. 

He remained knelt at this altar. 

Devotion be damned, this one was holy to him. 

That old song tangled through his bones like the veins on an arrowplant leaf. Noah could hear it thrum internally as it traveled around his chest cavity and flew behind his eyes. 

I ain't goin’ to state no color 

But her front teeth is crowned in gold

She got a mortgage on my body

And a lien on my soul 

Thank you! We may see a part 2 if enough of you ask for it? But that definitely wouldn’t star Noah *cough*. 

#bad omens fanfiction #bad omens fanfic #bad omens fic #auntievwroteit #noah sebastian fic #noah sebastian fanfic

[menelaiad]

can I prompt you to talk about Menelaus sparing Helen I'm just like :chinhands: about everything u say about the house of atreus

hey, if you're willing to listen, i'm more than happy to talk - thank you!

so. again. we got Big Three versions.

menelaus says 'guys it's chill i'll kill her at home. let's all cool our jets' (this is the version in euripides)

menelaus goes to kill her himself. helen shows her boobs. menelaus suddenly very chill (this is also implied by euripides)

menelaus gets men to kill her. helen shows her boobs. men suddenly very chill (stesichorus)

CAN YOU GUESS WHICH TWO I DESPISE? no. fr. the last two (the boob two) are far too dependent on helen being vain. and helen .... almost not feeling any guilt or shame from what's happened. and we know that's not true from the iliad. these two, to me, are classic. THIS IS JUST HOW HOT HELEN WAS propaganda. cause yknow. ur a greek/roman/ancient dude and you hear that helen of sparta showed you her boobs like 'damn bro i wouldn't kill her either ahahahaha pass the wine, maximus'.

but helen was never vain. she was never arrogant. she was confident and self-assured. but it's pretty much everyone AROUND helen that comments on her beauty and stuff. she never really does herself? which is another fascinating element of her character tbh. so her doing THIS as a means to be spared? doesn't suit me. do i think helen wanted to die/was willing to die? no. but i think she would have gone about pleading for her life a different way, y'know? also i hate the whole 'her tits got her into this mess they'll get her out of it' like shut UP. menelaus is not 12. he's fucking 60 odd at this point. he is tired. he is wounded. he is so beyond mentally well. give him some respect. he wouldn't have been blind sided by this.

but i don't think menelaus EVER planned to kill her. i can accept euripudes' version cause i think there would have been a lot of greek men that would have wanted to see helen dead. it makes sense yknow? they dont see the full narrative. the big picture. as far as they're concerned helen ran away. loads of people died. and now she's gonna get away with it. they're not narrative aware enough to see all the cogs of fate and the gods and all this. so i can respect that some greeks would have wanted her to suffer and menelaus would have risked a fuckin riot if he outright said 'nah lads she's fine lets crack on' so the whole 'wait til we get home' narrative is a good way for him to save time. to buy him and helen some time to come up with a plan, a story. to hear each other out. to work through stuff. they don't get back to sparta for like. 10 more years. they can EASILY have come up with some reason why she's not been killed yet. or why he's not gonna go through with it/why it's all worked out.

in regards to menelaus never wanting to kill her, i believe that because of how menelaus behaves in the iliad. menelaus is constantly lamenting the deaths of the greeks. the needless death and suffering. how these men are working and sacrificing to get helen back. to bring her HOME. what would killing her do? another senseless death. all the sacrifice for naught because menelaus doesnt get his wife back. he goes back to sparta alone. as if he never even went to fucking troy and tried to get her back?????

and also because menelaus loves her. despite everything he loves her and he never stopped. it's why i really like his portrayal in IOA even if he is a giant ass clown. he's a man desperate to get his wife back. and he's under the impression they're just gonna go to troy and get her back. simple as. two months tops. he's frantic and desperate and willing to try anything to get her back (yo bro kill ur daughter for me kthx). and i don't think that desire to get her back changes. menelaus grows more subdued and quiet. and has less fire. but he's still trying. he goes toe to toe with paris, is willing to take on hektor. menelaus is very much: 'i am dying at troy or i am leaving with my wife' and how is that not love? it's literally. he is going to get her back or die trying.

(also idk how much people value to fall of troy texts that are around but like. menelaus kills deiphobus in those. when dei is with helen. the man is insane in those moments he could easily have took helen out too in his madness. but he doesn't. also also. when he's in the horse and he hears helen, he's said to 'groan' when he remembers her and given the context of the other men weeping and stuff. this is like. a groan of pain. hearing helen's voice after so long and remembering her. HURTS him. he's missed her so much.)

menelaus and helen loved each other. you see it in odyssey 4. the healing they must have gone through in those 10 years. is so admirable and powerful. and they did it because they wanted to. because they were gonna see this out. they were gonna make this work. and even zeus acknowledges it. because he lets menelaus into elysium just to be with helen (his own DAUGHTER) for eternity. even though menelaus has LITERALLY no elysium qualities. not even zeus cant bear to separate these two.

they're just so fucking powerful.

#long post for ts /// #menelaus #yes i am starting to tag my menelaus stuff. ive studied him for a decade. #ive given talks on him. ive written papers and been referenced in essays im about him #2023 is the year i embrace the 'menelaus expert' meme #that isn't ............. talking to a class and having them stare at me for like an hour #i have no idea if anyone agrees with ANYTHING i ever say #but i refuse to be silenced tbh #havent been quiet about the HOA for ten years. im not starting now #thank you for the kind words though friend!!! this passion has a very special place in my heart #it's nice to have an outlet for my menelaus thoughts <3

[heller-castiel]

My Fics:

Bobby Day: Sam and Dean don’t have a mom to celebrate on Mother’s Day - they just have a Bobby.

This’ll be the Day That I Die: “They had this song, before they got married, that they loved. Cheek to Cheek, you know? And they’d look so damn sad when it’d play on the record, even though he asked her to marry her to that fuckin’ song. Had to tell Sammy to stop playing that record cause they hated to be reminded of their marriage so much.” Dean swallowed. “Hell, the song feels more like a funeral march than anything else after a childhood of that. Promise me? Promise me we won’t be like that? Together and hating each other for it?”

Castiel took in a mouthful of smoke and lied. “I promise.”

Or: The American Pie (by Don McLean) fic

Holy Palmers' Bloody Kiss: It’s nice, getting to take care of his family, getting to heal his family. Dean’s always been looking out for everyone else, was raised for it, bred for it even, and he’s made his peace with that. Held his baby brother in his arms and he knew what he was made for, going to sleep in beige hotel rooms stained in dark browns and reds with a baby in one hand and a revolver in the other. 

He’s never gotten to offer healing, saving, before. It’s the first time since he was a kid that looking out for family didn’t mean guns and death and revenge. 

Worm Ridden Filth: Mary had told him, that was the danger of them coming up - they weren’t made for people. They didn’t know how to avoid being hurt, so people needed to be careful to not hurt them.

Dean didn’t wanna hurt anybody, least of all a worm.

Or: Dean learns about life and love and death over the years through the power of worms.

Safety in the Stealing and Keeping: The hair isn’t what's startling about her. It’s the oversized brown leather jacket she’s swathed in, the sleeves uncuffed that her hands just barely peek out from, that ends at the middle of her thighs. It looks like a piece of armor on her. It looks like a blanket on her. It looks startling like a mirror to Dean, who knows that jacket well.

Or: Claire's got some emotional turmoil in a stolen oversized leather jacket. Dean remembers the feeling.

Goodnight Moon: Cas shifts in his arms, turning to face Dean, and just as Cas wants to hold him, Dean is ready to be held in return. Their left arms reach across their chests where they are pressed together, and they do not clasp hands but rest the backs of them against each other, and Dean’s right arm falls to rest on Cas’s hip just as Cas’s right falls to Dean’s hip, and together they let their foreheads rest on each other’s.

Or, Cas has insomnia sometimes. Dean brings him back to bed.

You Can Start To Make It Better (Beautiful Beautiful Boy): Dean goes to bed with Cas the night Jack's finally ready to reform heaven and give up his Godly powers; but before he does, he pulls Dean into heaven to bring someone back, one last time.

Or: Dean Winchester works through his mommy issues with some heavenly therapy.

Don’t Make it Bad: He walked up to Cas, looming over the kitchen counter, and pressed himself up against those hunched shoulders, wrapping his arms around Cas’s waist, and pressed his nose to Cas’s neck, breathing in, feeling the smell of Cas’s soap and sweat and sleep expand in his lungs and fill him with love. Cause he loved Cas, and he could think it now, even if he still couldn’t saying it. “Stop leaving me,” he prayed to grace that had been left to rot alone in the Empty.

In his arms, Cas tensed. “Sam..?” he said, cautious.

That love in Dean’s chest staled. “What the fuck?”

If You Ran Away, Just Come Home: Dean wandered, after. The night that Chuck died, subsumed into Amara, he had silently climbed into his car in the dead of night, walking past Jack's room, past Sam's room.

In his room, Sam laid in his bed with Eileen, and felt the air displace itself around where Dean slipped past in the hallway, instincts attuning him to movement just as they made Dean move soundlessly, without a thought to it. but Dean didn’t think of that. Dean only thought of moving, getting out, going -

Going to something the bunker couldn’t be, anymore. Something he couldn’t ever go to.

But he had to go.

Five Names Dean Winchester Has Gone By: John walked through the crooked motel door with his tired face and strong, drooping shoulders, looking up like looking at his kids was the last thing he wanted to do, like it made his shoulders all the heavier. Dean was cradling little baby Sam, holding a bottle to his mouth and humming “Hey Jude,” like the only example he had, and his head had startled up at the door, scared of what was coming in with nothing to protect them, relieved to see his father, confused why John was crying.

Ken Doll: Dean was fourteen when he found it.

Your Hair Falling Into Place Like Dominoes: Dean lets his hair grow out when he’s not paying attention to it.

#my works #my fics #deancas fanfiction #spn fanfiction

[degreeofdisorder]

young royals s3e3 episode reaction

episode 3 is where everything always turns to shit so I'm super not looking forward to this lmfao

ohoho the queen of sweden is having a nervous breakdown. so relatable of her.

I'm lowkey also having a breakdown over wille immediately going into prince mode just bc his mom isn't doing well.

"why do you think I didn't tell you anything? because you wouldn't be able to handle it" NNNNNOOOOOOOO

oh my god that one hit WAY too hard. I can't deal with the mommy issues today.

ugh deeply agreeing with wille. simon needs to lock his social media and throw his phone away. he's starting to stress me the fuck out.

"both for me and the people around me" oh that's... quite the sentence. I know simon just got sucker punched by the fact that it's always gonna be like this

"all I want is to be with you" well you can't!

bro I hate teenagers so fuckin much lmfao

NOT BORIS WANTING TO PSYCHOANALYZE AUGUST

that was psychic warfare from wille idc

"he's decided that I'm evil" lmao you are

"I don't see the point in being nice if he's never gonna forgive me" "well, sometimes being nice to others can make you feel very good" JDKFJDLFJDKFJDKFDJKDOGIDL BORIS LOVE OF MY LIFE

THAT IS SO SHADYYYYYY LMFAO

I genuinely cannot stand vincent. if there's anyone in that school who's legit evil it's gotta be vincent.

oh. yeah. I'm feeling murderous.

fuck you country of sweden you know what you did.

FREDRIKA TYING UP HER HAIR TOO WHEN THE HOUSEMASTER CALLS FELICE OUT OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOD

god. teenage girls make the world go round.

NOT WITH THE SCHOOL INSPECTORS PRESEEEEENTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

NOOOOO SKRKSJRLSKFLSKFLSKDLSKDLD

YOU TWO KEEP REHEARSING

NOT PLAYING A SINGLE KEY AND HUMMING SIFKDLFKSLFKSLFKSLFKDLFKDLFF

oh my god my baby boys

it's the fact that them being so public means that not one (1) person in that room believed they were "rehearsing" jdkfjdlfjdlfjdl

the crown prince alone in a soundproof room with his boyfriend? sure.

god that was HILARIOUS

"I just wish I could get a single moment with you without getting interrupted" [get interrupted]

cinema

of course vincent is going to LA. my bro is going to be an oscar winner in no time, given all the dramatics.

oh

oh sweet jesus

simon, this is NOT the time or place to die on the labor movement hill

oh god

man being a teenager was so exhausting I'm so glad I don't have to do anything like that again

when they eat the rich I hope vincent is first in the grill

I hope felice singlehandedly closed the school lmao

I don't wanna like the whole sara and micke thing I really don't but UGH it's so sweet.

oh

OH

oh he's not is he

IS HE FUCKING

BROOOOOOOOOOO THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY

"he seems nice" oh august you are so clueless

this isn't happening skfkdkgkdkflf

oh my god what is it with royal boys and going "you're the only one I can talk to" y'all can afford a therapist can't you

NOT THE BAKING OHHHHH MY BABIES

"you may have inherited my diagnoses, sara, but you're not me" oh fuck

bro I am like. super into sara and micke hashing shit out, neurodivergently

I can't take wille seriously in the chorus. I cannot. he's so funny

oh god sara is coming back

oh fuck me up I love it when they're all sun kissed and beautiful and have nice lil conversations in front of everyone bc they're boyfriends publicly ohohoho

oh

oh my god

oh is that gonna be the hallway scene

not august waving at sara??? bro get up????

omg the looks from stella and fredrika were SCATHING

not them skipping and swinging their hands together you guys I'm losing my whole damn mind it's getting bad it's getting so bad

WHOOOOOOOREEEEESSSSSSS

OOHHH MY GOD

holy fuck that was....... quite the scene huh

um

let me rewind just now for a lil bit

for science

my brothers in christ you are sluts.

something abt them getting to have slutty slutty sex and finishing off with an I love you heals something in me that has been broken since 2021 ngl

like look at them! they're my boys!!! they're in love and they get to have somewhat public (bc like, a hallway? really?) sex bc they're together and everyone knows!!! they love each other and they can express that in a physical form!!!!! my little strumpets!!!!!!!

ah. fucking figures, huh

of course, thanks micke

oh they're in the literal and metaphorical afterglow!!!!! I love this for them

oh that's not a great train of thought to have after sex now is it

"you can trust me" wille, my love my darling, I love you, truly, from the bottom of my heart, but can he? can he really?

oh that's an actually genius move to show both sides of the coin

I do think simon probably should not be there. son's gonna get too much attention

oh I just remembered the episode description a hahahahahahahaahahahahahaha ha oh I don't want to watch

that was precious but I swear to god simon think with your brain for once aaaaaaaaaa FUCK

great now she just posted his location. and he also fully reposted it didn't he

is he genuinely that dumb like at this point even if you're not famous by proxy you still should know not to post your live location?????? Simon. please.

oh right I forgot the monarchy can't be seen involved with that...... I was more worried abt his safety ldjfldjfldkf

oh

oh no

I was right to worry about his safety

FUUUUUUCK

ugh

#yr livenats #young royals spoilers #yr s3 spoilers

[perspectivestarters]

Perspective's Sentence Starters; SOUR by Olivia Rodrigo (Part I)

BRUTAL

I want it to be, like, messy.

I'm so insecure.

I think that I'll die before I drink.

I'm so caught up in the news.

I'm so tired that I might quit my job, start a new life.

They'd all be so disappointed.

Who am I if not exploited?

I'm so sick of seventeen.

Where's my fucking teenage dream?

If someone tells me one more time "Enjoy your youth," I'm gonna cry.

I don't stick up for myself.

I'm anxious, and nothing can help.

I wish I'd done this before.

I wish people liked me more.

All I did was try my best.

This the kinda thanks I get?

They say these are the golden years.

I wish I could disappear.

God, it's brutal out here.

I feel like no one wants me.

I hate the way I'm perceived.

I'm a nervous wreck.

I love people I don't like.

I hate every song I write.

I'm not cool.

I'm not smart.

I can't even parallel park.

Just havin' a really good time.

Got a broken ego?

God, I don't even know where to start.

TRAITOR

I played dumb, but I always knew.

I always knew that you talked to her, maybe did even worse.

I kept quiet so I could keep you.

Ain't it funny how you ran to her the second that we called it quits?

Ain't it funny how you said you were friends?

It sure as hell don't look like it

You betrayed me.

I know that you'll never feel sorry.

You talked to her when we were together.

Loved you at your worst, but that didn't matter.

It took you two weeks to go off and date her.

Guess you didn't cheat, but you're still a traitor.

I know if you were true, there's no damn way that you could fall in love with somebody that quickly.

Ain't it funny?

Remember I brought her up and you told me I was paranoid?

I wish that you had thought this through before I went and fell in love with you.

Don't you dare forget about the way you betrayed me.

You gave me your word, but that didn't matter

Yeah, you're still a traitor.

DRIVERS LICENSE

I got my driver's license last week.

Just like we always talked about.

Today, I drove through the suburbs crying 'cause you weren't around

You're probably with that blonde girl who always made me doubt.

She's so much older than me.

She's everything I'm insecure about.

How could I ever love someone else?

I know we weren't perfect, but I've never felt this way for no one.

I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone.

Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me.

'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street.

All my friends are tired of hearing how much I miss you.

I kinda feel sorry for them.

They'll never know you the way that I do.

I still see your face.

Can't drive past the places we used to go to.

I still fuckin' love you, babe.

I still hear your voice in the traffic.

God, I'm so blue.

1 STEP FORWARD, 3 STEPS BACK

All I did was speak normally

Somehow, I still struck a nerve.

You got me fucked up in the head.

Never doubted myself so much.

Am I pretty?

Am I fun?

I hate that I give you power over that kinda stuff

It's always one step forward and three steps back

I'm the love of your life until I make you mad.

Do you love me, want me, hate me?

I don't understand.

Maybe in some masochistic way, I kind of find it all exciting.

Which lover will I get today?

Will you walk me to the door or send me home crying?

It's back and forth.

Did I say something wrong?

Maybe this is all your fault instead.

I'd leave you, but the rollercoaster's all I've ever had.

DEJA VU

I bet she's braggin' to all her friends, sayin' you're so unique.

So when you gonna tell her that we did that, too?

She thinks it's special, but it's all reused.

That was our place, I found it first.

I made the jokes you tell to her when she's with you.

Do you get déjà vu when she’s with you?

Do you get déjà vu?

Do you call her, almost say my name?

Let's be honest, we kinda do sound the same.

I hate to think that I was just your type.

Now I bet you even tell her how you love her in between the chorus and the verse.

That was the show we talked about.

Played you the songs she's singing now when she's with you.

Don't act like we didn't do that shit, too.

You're tradin' jackets like we used to do

Everything is all reused.

Play her piano, but she doesn't know that I was the one who taught you.

A different girl now, but there's nothing new.

I know you get déjà vu

GOOD 4 U

Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily.

You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks.

Remember when you said that you wanted to give me the world?

I guess that you've been workin' on yourself.

I guess that therapist I found for you, she really helped.

Now you can be a better man for your brand-new girl.

You look happy and healthy.

Not me, if you ever cared to ask

You're doin' great out there without me, baby.

God, I wish that I could do that.

I've lost my mind.

I've spent the night cryin' on the floor of my bathroom.

You're so unaffected, I really don't get it.

I guess you're gettin' everything you want.

You bought a new car and your career's really takin' off.

It's like we never even happened.

Baby, what the fuck is up with that?

It's like you never even met me.

Remember when you swore to god I was the only person who ever got you?

Well, screw that, and screw you

You will never have to hurt the way you know that I do.

Maybe I'm too emotional.

Your apathy's like a wound in salt.

Maybe you never cared at all.

#rp sentence starters #rp sentence meme #rp sentence prompts #sentence starters #sentence meme #sentence prompts #lyric sentence starters #lyric starters #music starters #rp meme #rp memes #rp prompts #ask meme #exodusmusing #*mystarters #*sour

[kaloakoala]

AHHHHHHRGE - me @ that stupid ass character in the first couple of chapters

just thought and feelings as I read the Fourth Wing

Chapter 1 to ♾️: Fuck you jack~

Chapter 16: I’m full of rage b/c of this stupid stupid stupid character. I’m gonna fist fight a fictional character. Right now.

- Dain Aetos has had me in a rage since start. He’s going to be the reason she gets hurt. Cannot change my mind on that.

- also my favorite character is Garrick

- DONT ACT LIKE YOU DIDNT JUST TRY AND TAK HER OUT OF CHOOSING BOTH OF THEM DAIN

- not even two seconds after I started listening to the book again, DAIN FUCKING KISSED HER! FUCK YOU DAIN! I had to pause the book and take a moment of silence. Dain made me contemplate running the car off the road. That how much I don’t like him.

- I’m so glad there Violet and Dains kiss SUCKED ASS

- GET IT RHIANNON!! YOU GO GIRL

- Again, I love Garrick. Love him to death.

- Dain, my boy, you are stupid af. You don’t kiss a girl then TURN AROUND AND TELL HER YOU CANNOT BREAK THE RULE AND BE WITH HER YOU IDIOT

- I love you Imogen

- it’s me realizing that the dislike Tairn has for Dain is the same as my dislike for Dain

- Dain needs to calm the fuck down before he loses a fuckin life. He also needs to realize that Violet is nowhere near his property or EVEN HIS GIRLFRIEND and calm the fuck down. I want Tairn to burn him. Rn.

- No. don’t give that bitch boi ANY FUCKING SYMPATHY. You want to ‘help’ Dain? THEN FUCK THE FUCK OFF BITCH

-OOH POP OFF VIOLENCE GET EM DONT LET THAT MAN CHILD TELL YOU WHAT TO DO

- 1. I feel bad for Jeremiah (?) 2. Him reading Dains thoughts out loud is so fuckin funny

- not those kid’s attacking her in her sleep, she better kick their asses

- I need this child to hurry up and realize she’s wants to fuck this man cause god damn girl, he’s wants to eat you head to toe, and not in the cannibalistic way bestie

- I NEW GOLDIE WAS A BABY <3

- who the fuck unlocked the door?

- girl, thank god you finally admitted to wanting to fuck him 👏🏼👏🏼

- I FUCKING NEW IT! AMBER YOU FUCKING BITCH

- it’s the way Dain keeps showing his true self. She wanted Violet dead. Your best friend, Dain. I hate Dain so so so so very much

- I’m glad Jack is dead but I feel for Violet. Fuck Jack for stabbing Liam.

- YEA XADEN PUT DAIN IN HIS MF PLAcE

- I’m so goddamn glad they finally fucking but pls wording is killing me 😭

- NOT THEM BREAKING THE FUCKING DOOR IM DEAD

- 🫣🫢😧 - my face during this scene

- DID HER MOM HURT OUR BOY?

- OH LOL not the ‘don’t fall for me’

- “Should I get the Wingleader?” Tairn you’re stoooop

- I I I don’t I don’t know. She’s did NOT just say “loved” I’m gonna kick this girls ass. Ahhhhh

- Bitch, don’t be mad at the Dragons.

- her dad still helping her <3

-chapter 35 - did the gov set up the babies? Did they willing let them travel in a group larger than 3 because they are setting them up to kill them all? I’m heart can not handle this

- oh no.. oh no no no.. fuuuck

- Dain better fucking die.

- I’m cry 😭 those poor babies

- chapter 36- well why don’t you just rip my heart out and shove it in a shredder.

- 1. Violet need to understand, had Xaden told her, he would be risking a lot of lives. 2. Dain violated Violet, it was not her fault.

#the fourth wing #dain aetos #violet should stop being your friend #Xaden riorson is better #violet and xaden #stfu dain #Garrick is my fav<3 #Rip Liam

[i-write-hurt-not-comfort]

so yesterday after me and a few others finished watching my vampire boyfriend, we got talking about ships and laito and stuff on call. and we had a particularly interesting conversation about laito and his loneliness. i feel like i need to write it down somewhere. 

// typical-laito themes, mentions of suicide and drugs under the cut. this is a long ass post. 

so in my head when i start pairing up everyone in DL, it goes as follows: 

kino gets with yuri, obviously. shin and carla have each other - whether you make that incest or just as brothers keeping each other company, isolated as founders. then you get shu and yuma, reiji and ruki, kou and subaru and i do like azusa and kanato; they are official rivals too. 

that leaves ayato and laito but goddamn, ayayui is my STRONG bias, so i’m gonna take ayato and put him with yui. 

who does that leave? laito. 

laito as a character is SO fuckin lonely. someone said yesterday that he was like a side character in his own routes and yknow what, it’s so painfully true. laito’s routes are so isolated from everyone else. yeah he rivals with kou in more blood but not in the same way as subaru rivals with kou. 

sure, ayato TRIES really hard to get through to laito, in both drama CDs and the games, ESPECIALLY lost eden. but laito generally turns it away. he isolates himself so hard, to the point where he is straight up suicidal and prepared to die so that he doesn’t have to carry the burden of having the powers of the man he hated the most in the whole word. 

until laito fully understands himself, his feelings and his trauma, i don’t think he will ever be able to love somebody. in fact when i look at all of the guys, i genuinely think laito is the only one who i don’t think will ever manage to have a healthy relationship. he might do “his best” but frankly i don’t think his best attempt at loving and trusting yui is enough and she would deserve so much better. 

laito’s existence is a pit - there’s that one quote that diane says in bojack horseman where she says “i’m a pit that good things fall into” or something like that. and damn, yeah, that reminds me of laito. i think back to lost eden when he says “i want you to let me hate you” 

this chronic emptiness is precisely why laito’s routes never feel like laito’s routes. his childhood was stolen and i don’t think he’ll ever get his sense of self back. hell i don’t think he ever developed one. this is one of the major reasons i think he has BPD. 

and this, all this, is why laito as a drug addict makes So Much Goddamn Sense. if he found something which made him feel good, confident and just a little bit more whole, he’d throw himself into it headfirst. and if he dies, he dies. but addiction is lonely. in the long term, it’d make him so much worse. 

laito loses himself very easily in more blood, dark fate and lost eden when bad things set him off. frankly i don’t think he has much of a chance after everything and we definitely see that. 

in fact in his lost eden vampire ending when he resets his existence or something and lives his life with yui without his memories of his mother, it’s pretty interesting that this is the only time he’s ever truly been happy. all the time he’s living in the shadow of what cordelia did to him, i don’t think he has much of a chance at a happy ending. 

thank u for coming to my tedtalk. i could talk about laito for hours. 

#diabolik lovers #laito sakamaki #text

[sharksa-shivers]

Real talk tho, why does Sharky self neglect himself so much? Tw: Self hate, depression, suicide talk, ect

I wrote something recently that i feel sums up Sharky's feelings pretty well, i'll share it cuz i really like it despite it being sad obviously. TW: Sucide mention, depression, self hate, ect. --- Sharky crys more, grasping at the beanie on his head. "……Yknow, it's funny………You know Max has depression and…His is really bad, he always talks about wanting to kill himself and stuff………and yet i know i probably hate my own guts more then he could ever hate himself………Nobody really ever sees how much i hate myself because i don't talk about it……..I'm not depressed, i just hate myself to the core……….And yet i don't want to kill myself either……..But i probably should…Nothings going to ever get better…And if i died then the world wouldn't mourn me………..But i love life and i love being here and i just………i wish so bad that people could see me as a damn person but i know even if i live past 100, i will never get that wish…I'm always going to be a beast til the day i die…Just a stupid worthless shark…That's all i'm gonna be……….My feelings are really complicated…" Sharky's tears stream down his face and he keeps sniffling, he's just completely broken…

Kristy tries to be respectful and listen……..But the sheer hate, he……….She never could imagine somebody like Sharky of all people felt such visceral pain…….. --- So...Yeah...........That's...Why Sharky does it so much... Tl;dr-It's part of his arc and he has to work through it... This topic is...Alottttttttttttttttttt and obviously i have left out some stuff but this is the basic jist lol...The very very basic barebones jist... Hopefully i explained...Alright fdjfdhjfdhfdhjfd i really fuckin hope i did cuz this is important stuff to me...

#kidnappedseries #kidnappedseries rambles #Sharky #SharkySharkson

[hunterssm00n]

Natural Born Sinner / part 2 /

The Comedian has addictions too, and they include more than just cigars and violence. | Eddie Blake/OC |

part 2 of 3

also on ao3: here

*cw include dubcon smut, obsessive behavior, unhealthy relationships, degradation, stalking, emotional/psychological abuse, misogyny, name-calling, breaking and entering, past abuse, dark themes*

౨ৎ

hunterssm00n © All rights reserved by me. I do not allow this work to be used or adapted in any way without my permission.

Don't try and stop me now / Don't you make a sound / You've built yourself up, oh, so high / Just to tear me down

Eddie Blake was a lot of things, good and bad. Good fighter, bad loser. Good looking as all hell, bad sonofabitch when you got to know him. Good hero...? For the most part - he cared a lot about justice, even if he tended to handle his strengths with malicious intent. Good promise keeper, good with a gun, good at doling out 'justice'; bad team player, strong, smart, charming, resourceful, brutal, uncompromising, merciless... 

And, unfortunately, for any woman who happened to cross paths with him, he was damn good at seduction.

His kiss was intoxicating, unyielding. She'd spent many a time with him drunk off his presence, his actions, his touch. He was like a shot of whiskey running through her veins, making her want more and more and more still. Addicting. His lips were simultaneously stealing the breath from her and breathing life back into her. God, she hated how much she wanted him. 

She pushed her hands against his bare chest, the dark, coarse hair coating his front tickling the tips of her fingers. The push did nothing to move him - he was a solid wall of heat in front of her. She tried very hard not to kiss him back. It sounded silly. Right now it was like a physical urge - she felt like she would die if she didn't go forward with this. He was kissing her - his tongue curling along the seam of her lips, trying to get her to open them for him. He nibbled on her lips, sucking at them, his scruff abrading the soft skin of her face deliciously. The farthest she'd gone was to part her lips. She was having trouble breathing so heavily through her nose with his face against hers. He didn't seem to mind that she was not responding to his administrations. He just continued plowing on through, typical Eddie.

One of those large hands curled into her hair, tilting her head back so he could move onto her neck. She heard her heartbeat in her ears, felt it underneath his lips. He sucked on the area of her pulse point, gently taking it between his teeth. She couldn't stop her hands from gripping onto his waist - his very naked waist. She could feel him, hard and ready against her gut; ready for what would inevitably happen. God she wanted him so bad. His other hand pulled at the back of her towel so that there would be nothing between them. "Eddie..." Her protest sounded weak even to her ears, "Don't, you gotta go,"

"No, baby," His voice was a low rumble against her ear, making her clench her legs even harder together. "You don't want that, I don't want that."

"I do, I want-"

She let out a yelp when she felt something unyielding thrust up into her core, without warning - one of his long, thick fingers. Her legs nearly gave out underneath her; she clutched onto his waist, digging her nails in. 

He groaned into her hair, "Yeah baby, that's what I'm talkin' about," He worked that finger back and forth now, a little more gently after feeling how tight she was, "Wetter than the fuckin' ocean, just like always,"

"Eddie, stop," she whispered, her voice not carrying any authority whatsoever. She bit at his collarbone, scratching his lower back with one hand and grasping weakly at his wrist with the other. Stop did not mean add a second finger to her heat, but that was what he did. Stop did not mean continue to leave bite marks and scruff burn all over her neck. And it certainly didn't mean drag her back towards the tub full of water.

"Wait, wait," she panted, pushing both hands against his chest as he stepped back into the tub full of water. He withdrew his fingers from inside of her and gripped both hands onto her curvy waist, ready to hoist her in there with him. "Eddie." Ignoring her pleas, he lifted her up off the floor and into the tub with him. Even under the spell of lust she knew what a bad idea this was, and she tried to twist away from him, to get back out of the knee deep water. His hands didn't let her to, sliding up to her supple breasts to crush her back against his chest. She could feel his heart pounding against her back, feel the steel rod of his desire pressing against her backside.

"Sweetheart, why d'ya even bother fighting?" She felt the deep reverberations from his voice rumble against her spine as he spoke against her shoulder. The hair follicles on his face scratched against her soft skin, making her want to grab him and kiss him. "You know what's gonna happen,"

"No, no." It was hard to put her foot down when one of his hands was massaging her breasts and the other was creeping down her stomach towards the V between her legs.

"Cuz it happens every time. Ain't neither one of us gonna deny this. Us. You and me." 

She shook her head, trying to form the words in her mind. Any coherent thought besides ones of desire would have been helpful. "There is no you and me- You and I, Eddie, Christ you know how to speak English, don't you?" she gasped out, feeling one of his large fingers start stroking torturously between her legs. 

"'Chelle, you know that's bullshit," The hand that had been on her breasts slid up to her throat, tilting her head back gently so she was leaning it back on his right shoulder. "And don't be using your fancy schmancy English degree on me, ain't nobody in this city's better'n anyone else."

The finger between her legs stopped suddenly, giving her a moments reprieve. "Oh, that's right," Came his voice in her ear, a smile that she could hear even in his words, "You didn't get your fancy fuckin' degree - you dropped out. You're a rebel, just like me." 

She rolled her eyes, finally gaining control over her primary motor functions, "I'm not like you, Eddie," She was still panting, damn him. It didn't help that he clutched her to him so tightly. If he didn't, though, he knew she'd try and slip away again. 

"Sure ya are," he chuckled, kissing her temple, "You're a freak. It's not an insult, doll,"

"I'm not," she protested, digging her nails into his hard thighs, "I didn't try to rape Sally Jupiter." 

Instead of the reaction she had been anticipating - one of anger - he sighed, woefully. "Baby, you know I wasn't gonna hurt her."

"But you did, Eddie," The strength was coming back into her voice, because now she was really angry. "You beat the shit out of her!" 

"She started it." Was his reply. Like there was nothing to it. Like he didn't try and take what he thought, once again, was his for the taking. Typical Eddie, thinking the world owed him something. 

"It doesn't matter who started it. What matters is that it even happened!" 

"Why are we talkin' 'bout this now, huh?" Annoyed now, he slid two fingers inside of her once again, his thumb working at her clit. The top of her body wanted to bow forward, but his hand on her collarbone wouldn't let her. That same hand traced up her neck to cradle her jaw, and he nuzzled his face into her hair with an angry sigh. "We can be doin' anything else right now,"

"I don't want to do anything with you, ever," she groaned, trying to close her legs against his insistent fingers, "You're a murderer and a rapist and a- a- Just a bad fucking man!" 

She was sure that would set him off, and she would feel a sense of triumph at angering him. Instead, that same low chuckle that she heard in her dreams poured out of him like molasses. "Hun, I love when you sweet talk me," He pressed his hips into her backside, his still rock-hard arousal pressing into her ass cheeks. "Now do both of us a fuckin' favor and quit fuckin' bein' a bitch."

"Fuck you," she growled, throwing an elbow back against him, hoping to catch him in the jaw. He moved his head out of the way, quick as lightning, and because he was trained in the art of combat, he grabbed her arm with surprising speed with the hand that had been stroking her face. He held fast, not tight enough to hurt but tight enough to ensure that she couldn't try it again. 

"Ohh no, baby," She could hear the grin in his voice, feel the glee leaking out of his depraved heart, "Fuck you,"

He lurched both of them forward so she was thrown up onto her knees, pushed her face first into the peach colored tile wall, and she knew it was all over. 

౨ৎ

AN: I do not own the Watchmen franchise or any of it's characters. Michelle is my own OC. I also do not own the song 'Natural Born Sinner' by In This Moment. The above pictures are from pinterest, and have links attached back to their original posts.

part 3

#jdm #jeffrey dean morgan #negan smith #edward blake #eddie blake #the comedian #watchmen 2009 #watchmen #jeffrey dean morgan x original female character #hunterssm00n #ao3 #eddie blake x original female character #edward blake x original female character #fanfiction #my drabbles #my work #mine** #my writing #twd negan #max the resident #negan

[itissadbutitsmy-artblog]

Dr. C x Momdebra. Thoughts?

you sent me this while i was not sober i wish you couldve heard me laugh

um ok so i actually have lots of thoughts after thinking about it all night. my FIRST thought was that abracadaniel's "were you guys talkin about me ',:D" makes me think she has something going on with ABRACADANIEL, but (brushes that aside) hes gay smh. but he clearly wants cal's approval.

WHICH HE'D WANT IF SHE WAS DATING HIS SISTERR OHHH

also other thoughts. it explains why she was so completely bland about cadebra this entire time. youd think shed either love her or hate her, given that deb's a main character the only other member of the Weak House. but she ignores her during class entirely. no playing favorites in doctor cal's class no sir ignores the whole pep thing. she DOES very very gently go check on her when pep runs off and blaines out there smearing his name.

well. i think itd be fun. i mean. i am. very angry at this lady for everything she did and she is not very nice (WHICH LADY? YES). but cal has this very supportive kind veneer i think she really did love those kids to some extent (bro it stops when you leave them lying in an alley alone to die. but she DID just want everyone to have a good time in her class. and "ohh, hey, ease up" lives in my mind forever, as insidious as it was, given who she was saying it to and when. "thats my favorite student you're talking about." augh. okay. that really does hit.)

BUT i think itd be fun. because momdebra is soooo overbearing and intense, mom wants cadebra to push herself so far, mom is insistent that cadebra follow a specific path and track specific numbers to make herself the perfect wizard as dictated by arbitrary levels and abilities. whereas, doctorate though she may have, cal seems so much more holistic, and just wants everyone to follow their own path and learn their own way, and fill their heads with joy and knowledge, she wants everyone to delight in the pursuit of learning and she will stand out in the rain and the mud with you and gently explain the cultural and historical significance of every artifact you find for hours until you are satisfied. like thats her deal. i do not forgive her for the things she did (i need to remind myself of that because im MAD ! she left blaine there defenseless she WATCHED spader die!) but i do think she has a truly kind side to her because learning and pleasure in doing so are actually important to her. just, not as important as bringing about the second age of terror. anyways. sorry this turned into me trying to unravel my cal thoughts.

so i think it would be really funny to see her and momdebra interact over deb. as partners. like mom keeps sending a miserable deb back to work on her incantations over and over and cal is like oh, my goodness, are you still on that? deb, let's go look at some bugs, in the park. (there's a secret hidden lesson buried in the bug-observing expedition) (also she tells her what a good job she's doing and how she can be a wizard in any way she wants no matter what her mom says) (it's corney as hell) (cuz that's cal for you). i would LOVE to think this chills momdebra out a little bit and she learns Acceptance. but i doubt it. she is just blinded by her cool 20 foot tall girlfriend who is so super good at magic. did you know doctor caledonius is level 80000, cadebra??? YOU could be level 80000 so EASILY if you just APPLIED YOURSELF.

anyways it's so sad we cant ship damn near any of the fuckin adults together without running into "SO THEY WERE OKAY WITH LETTING THEIR PARTNER'S DAUGHTER DIE. SO THEY WERE OKAY WITH HELPING THAT TO HAPPEN." like. bro. this is so sad. cal threw deb at her friends and said "get rid of her". cadebra doesnt even have like,,,, any cool adults to run to about this does she. cal in this scenario was probably a level-headed nice person in her life who seemed to support her and want her to be herself. and she went to brain wizard when she was scared that one time. and now what. she went to abracadaniel when she was scared that other time but whats he gonna do??? huddle her under a blanket and go yell at his sister for dating a maniac until he remembers he's too scared of her to do that and then come to hide under the blanket with deb.

i dunno how to end this post i got words. my thoughts: 9/10 excellents fun scenario to play in. i absolutely wanna see what that does to cadebra's life.

#when they first go to magic history class cal picks up pep and swings him around with stars in her eyes #and cadebra looks at them in horror #which is really good and funny on a lot of levels. but this makes it way funnier #MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! D:< #adventure time #asks #distant lands #not art

[windwheeler-aster]

superache event

guidelines

requests will only be accepted if they follow my normal request rules

only one character per request

you must choose your prompt(s), a genre, and a character

you may choose a song or song lyric, but you don’t have to. not everyone is familiar with conan’s music, so i’m more than happy to pick something that fits your request for you.

all requests will be written for a gender neutral reader

all songs and song lyrics come from songs on Conan Gray’s Superache album

instructions

pick a character

choose a prompt

choose a genre 

(optional) choose a song or song lyric from conan gray

(optional) provide extra details for request

submit request

characters available

all characters are available for platonic requests!

the following characters are not available for romantic requests:

qiqi, klee, sayu, diona, nahida, dori, yaoyao, barbara, bennet, razor, noelle, chongyun, collei, xingqiu, xiangling, fischl

prompts

childhood friends

enemies to lovers

fake dating

forbidden love

friends to lovers

lovers to enemies

mutual pining

rivals to lovers

strangers to lovers

unrequited love

one bed trope

accidental kiss

if you have other prompts, or variants of the “____ to ____” prompts, you may submit those too

genre

fluff

comfort (reverse)

hurt/comfort (reverse)

hurt/no comfort (reverse)

angst

songs

movies

people watching

disaster

best friend

astronomy

yours

jigsaw

family line

summer child

footnote

memories

the exit

song lyrics

movies

“i want a love like the movies” 

“all of our friends think of us jealously / we’re so sweet, so sweet”

“in my head, we’re dancing in the dark / in my head, we kiss under the stars”

“we’re holding hands, but it’s all just for show”

“and you say that it’s over, but why does she call you / at 3 a.m. and 4 a.m.? / that’s a funny way of staying friends”

people watching

“but i wanna feel all that love and emotion / be that attached to the person i’m holding”

“i’ve never really been in love, not seriously”

disaster

“‘cause the potential of us, it was keeping me up all night long”

“there’s so many factors / like, what if you freak out, and then we’re losing it all?”

“at the critical chapter where i say ‘i love you’ / and you don’t say it after”

“is it purely platonic to call me, like, every night?”

“but if i’m readin’ it wrong, man, it’d be better off if i died”

best friend

“that’s my fucking throw up in the bathroom, but still love them”

“that’s my fucking lifeline, that’s my ride or die, like”

“that’s my fucking hate you, but you know that that’s a damn lie”

“made a promise that i’m gonna marry you / if we’re both still single by, like, 32”

astronomy

“a tale old as time, young love don’t last for life”

“we’ve traveled the seas, we’ve ridden the stars / we’ve seen everything from saturn to mars”

“as much as it seems like you own my heart / it’s astronomy, we’re two worlds apart”

“you said, ‘distance brings fondness,’ but guess not with us”

“stop trying to keep us alive / you can’t force the stars to align when they’ve already died”

yours 

“i’m somebody you touch, but never hold / and you’re somebody i’ll never really know”

“i know i’m not the one you really love / i guess that’s why i’ve never given up”

“all i wanted was that look in your eyes / like you already know that i’m the love of your life”

“the only thing that’s harder than sleepin’ alone / is sleepin’ with your ghost”

jigsaw

“i’ve changed every part of me / until the puzzle pieces aren’t me at all”

“you take every part of me / all of the things you need / then the rest you discard”

“all i did just to make you happy / still you don’t even fuckin’ love me”

“killin’ parts of myself to fit you / clear as shit i was not the issue”

family line

“i say they’re just the ones who gave me life / but i truly am my parents’ child”

“it’s hard to put it into words / how the holidays will always hurt”

“and wonder what i did to deserve this / how could you hurt a little kid?”

“i can’t forget, i can’t forgive you / ‘cause now i’m scared that everyone i love will leave me”

“might share a face and share a last name, but / we are not the same”

summer child

“but there’s darkness behind those eyes / even when you smile”

“aren’t you way too busy / taking care of everybody / to take care of yourself?”

footnote

“but why would i lie? It’s so clear i’m in love / with you”

“a tense conversation, you like someone else / i say, ‘if i wanted, could that maybe help?’”

“you ate at a restaurant, the host said we’re cute / they think we’re a couple, they bought us some booze”

“oh, and i’d be embarrassed if i weren’t so pleased / that everyone else sees what you never see”

memories 

“i open up that door, see your brown eyes at the entrance / you just wanna talk, and i can’t turn away a / wet dog”

“please, don’t make it harder than it already is / i’m trying to get over this”

“you’re all drunk in my kitchen, curled in the / fetal position”

“‘i wish that you would stay in my memories’”

the exit

“starin’ at a girl who’s not me / on your arm, a carbon copy”

“feels like we had matching wounds / but mine’s still black and bruised / and yours is perfectly fine now”

“do you even doubt it on your lips?”

“you already found someone to miss / while i’m still standin’ at the exit”

writer chooses

i’ll choose a song lyric or song that best suits your request

#wheeler's events #genshin impact #genshin impact event #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #conan gray #conan gray superache #conan gray prompts #genshin romance #genshin fluff #genshin comfort #genshin hurt/comfort #genshin hurt/no comfort #genshin angst

[rockybloo]

I'm in love with Corroded Treasure, especially Loligo and Avis, can you tell us more about them? And how many people are gonna join their crew?

Gonna answer backwards since the first is def gonna be longer.

I honestly have no idea how many people will join Loligo and Avis' crew atm only because Corroded Treasure is lowkey a dumping ground for my old OCs that I still want to use. Which is why the whole world the story takes place in is based off toysets and such to make some sense in canon.

AS FOR LOLIGO AND AVIS-I have no idea how much anyone really reads lore wise but a quick run down is that Loligo is a god who achieved godly status by beating Davey Jones in a game. He enjoyed his powers until one day his crew pulled a mutiny and stole his eye, nerfing him and trapping him in a treasure box to be buried forever on an island unmarked by any map.

Avis is a avian sapient (winged race of people in Corroded Treasure) who is very much interested in pirates. She's honestly interested in the whole world but since she is an avian, they live high high HIGH above everyone else in the sky in lowkey isolation.

So she decides one day to bail and chase that pirate life after reading about the legend of a grand sea faring god.

And so Loligo became Avis's first treasure hunt. Something that should have ended with her empty handed as it was stated to be impossible for Loligo to ever be found but Avis is a master navigator and did the impossible.

And since she is such a good navigator, Loligo figured she would be perfect to find his eye and get his full powers back.

Initially he was just gonna use her an leave but over the course of his journey, he winds up growing attached because she is the only person who still sees him as some cool dude even though he's nerfed. So he winds up developing a crush.

He is very stubborn about this crush.

He would rather die than confess he is in love. He will, however, express affection but in such a way that he doesn't feel like a sap. He can't let the world know he's a simp.

Avis, on the other hand, is very obvious about her crushing. It is one of the first things anyone learns when they first meet the duo. She is Loligo's ride-or-die, even though he hates the concept of her being so willing to risk her life for him and scolds her every time. Ironically, she has no idea Loligo actually likes her. She just thinks he's being his flirtatious pirate self. Even when they get intimate together, she just thinks "Oh Cap'n is just being Cap'n~!" since he does flirt with others when parked at ports...but that's only so he can get people to do things for him. None of it is genuine unlike when he is with Avis.

And Loligo is just "How can I make things ANY MORE OBVIOUS I LOVE HER WITHOUT ACTUALLY SAYING IT I AM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS ME FUCKIN' DAMN IT"

So their dynamic is basically just Di$ney villain and his henchman but they both are crushing but henchman believes it's one sided when it's actual mutual.

#ask: loligo #ask: avis #ask: corroded treasure #ask #anon #ask: rum cake

[itsyourstarboy]

BAM

✨Freelancer OC✨

Continuing to draw my redacted listeners! Freelancer is up next, simply because he was the second listener I gave a face to.

And yet I STILL struggled with his design! I redesigned this ho three different times and I’m salty about it, however and I am very happy with how he came out in the end.

Info about him under the cut!

*maniacal laughter as I shamelessly info dump*

My Freelancer is named Jay and uses he/him pronouns

He is trans because I say so

5’6”

Gavin helps him re-dye his hair

Say it with me: ✨alt femboy✨

Definitely a bottom, I mean look at him

He’s a snarky little shit though

And very much a shameless flirt

Practically gives Gavin a run for his money when it comes to sweet talking strangers

I love thinking about how they met in 7-Eleven. Gavin flirting with this human born Freelancer that interrupted his meal, and said Freelancer flirting back, only to turn him down when it comes to any of his sexual advances.

Mixed signals are the reason Gavin wanted to see him again, tell me I’m wrong.

Sometimes he dresses in more edgy clothing, specifically ones that cover more skin (because sometimes that dysphoria be in a silly goofy mood 🤪)

He has a raging case of resting bitch face, which is hilarious when you find out he also sneezes like a kitten.

No, but seriously, he is actually really wholesome.

Precious boy.

Just a baby.

But he can and will stab you if you threaten his loved ones, and also might have once been charged with vandalism and arson (which he insists wasn’t on purpose, but the cops wouldn’t even let him try to explain how a flaming baseball can be hit in the direction of a police office on accident)

15% clingy; 15% insecure; 30% antisocial; 40% horny

The chains around his waist and the rings on his fingers are his weapons (also the pepper spray he keeps in his back pocket)

Helps that he can do magic though

He’s best at healing magic, because he wants to help others (especially Caelum, he would die for Caelum)

Sweet and salty foods are the way to his heart.

Give him chocolate covered pretzels and he will fuckin marry you on the spot

People pleaser :(( he feels guilty when others worry about him

Funnily enough, he feels like he has no friends, unless he’s around the DAMN boys, and then he’s like “oh, yeah, there they are.”

Like he has no object permanence

He constantly cracks his knuckles: an unbreakable habit that both Lasko and Damien HATE

Goes mute during depressive episodes and during/after panic attacks

It also causes him to dissociate a lot.

Gavin and Caelum try to bring him back with hugs :(

He calls Gavin Gav, babe, love, my heart, sexy, and Romeo (because he once quoted Shakespeare during smexy time and Jay will NOT let him live it down)

He is on antidepressants, and used to go to a therapist before going to DAMN

He wasn’t too sure about trying therapy again after Inversion, but he thinks it’s helping.

He’s not too sure.

Other than the actual therapist, Huxley is his therapist

He has taken it upon himself to be Caelum’s caregiver and he will fight anyone else who wants that title (including Gavin)

He goes into Mama Bear Mode REAL FUCKIN QUICK

If Vega hadn’t paralyzed him, he’d have been throwing HANDS

Gavin almost lost his life the day he mentioned empathy daemons the first time (in his second video)

Yknow, the part where he said something about teasing them (“its a little cruel, but damn if it isn’t fun.”)

Yeah, Gavin bout got his ass handed to him that day

He calls Caelum “Little Lamb”

Very physically affectionate and platonically flirty once he gets close enough to someone

He has given all the boys pet names, there is no way to escape them

None of them really mind, and if they do they will say so, however it was very funny the first time it happened.

I mean, he calls random strangers “hun” like it’s nothing, people think he’s crazy

He’s not, he’s just southern

He calls Lasko “Lasko-babe” (which was very interesting the first time)

Called Damien “hot-stuff” once (Dames did not take too kindly too it)

Obviously calls Huxley “big-guy”, but also “love” (platonically)

I imagine Gavin calling Jay so many pet names it’s almost sickening tbh

Baby bird, Blue bird, Blue Jay, Jay Bae, etc. (mostly bird themed)

#redacted asmr #art #illustration #oc #redacted freelancer #original character #drawing #redacted freelancer oc #redacted asmr listener #redacted listener #redacted listener oc #redacted fanart #redacted ocs #redacted headcanons #listener oc #redacted art #redactedverse #gendered listener #masc!listener #fem-coded listener