Midnight Pals: Patience
Thomas Disch: neil in the good omens game, is there a way to escape the dungeon without using the wizard's key?
Neil Gaiman: ah! a very good question!
Clive Barker: what? that's a terrible question
Gaiman: ah but there are NO bad questions, clive
Gaiman: curiosity is the rain that waters the seed of knowledge
Debbie Dadey: um excuse me sir neil gaiman but in Good Omens S2E42 aziraphale is shown performing the musubi dachi stance, but everyone knows that angels don't know karate
Dadey:[pushing glasses up nose] i sure hope someone was fired for THAT blunder
Gaiman: ah! a fine observation, thank you for sharing!
Gaiman: so great to communicate with astute readers!
Gaiman: [putting gold star sticker on Dadey's forehead] i'm giving you a gold star for that
Gaiman: in fact
Gaiman: you all get gold stars!
Koontz: oo! i want a gold star
Gaiman: [putting gold star sticker on Koontz's forehead] and so you shall!
King: incredible! nothing flusters him!
Poe: he's unflappable
King: like the world's most patient kindergarten teacher
Barker: no way, i don't buy it
Barker: nobody's THAT patient
Barker: i bet i could get him to snap
Poe: clive
Barker: hey neil i've got a question
Gaiman: yes?
Barker: actually
Barker:this is more of a comment than a question
Gaiman: [sweating, veins in neck pulsing] ah yes, go on
Poe: clive that's going too far
Neil Gaiman: you see dean
Gaiman: you can see anything, do anything
Gaiman: BE anything
Gaiman: without ever leaving home!
Dean Koontz: wowwww
Gaiman: all you have to do is use your super power
Koontz: my super power??
Gaiman: yes
Gaiman: it's called
Gaiman: IMAGINATION!!
Ray Bradbury: it was many years yonder when the open spaces were open and the blue skies were blue, and soda pop cost just a nickel and if you didn't have a nickel a smile would do, when you could see marshmallow dragons and candy corn castles in the clouds and you could do it all with the power of
Dean Koontz: oh yeah imagination, i already know that
Bradbury: and- what
Koontz: yeah, neil gaiman told me
Bradbury:
Ray Bradbury: listen neil i hear you've been going around extolling the power of imagination
Neil Gaiman: ah imagination! the poor man's wealth, the prisoner's release-
Bradbury: zip it bud
Bradbury: there's ONE dream weaver in this town and that's me
Bradbury: the limitless vista of a child's imagination ain't big enough for the both of us!!!
Bradbury: i have more child-like whimsy in my little finger, gaiman!
Bradbury: and i will use it to paint a rainbow of nostalgic vibes that will have you crying!
Bradbury: come at me, neil!! i'll make your childhood fuckin' magical!
Gaiman: wonderful, brilliant! just an excellent threat
Gaiman: the craftsmanship of it was sublime, you should be very proud, ray
Bradbury:
Bradbury: are you
Bradbury: are you being sarcastic?
Poe: i don't think he knows how
Bradbury: you're so genuine, i can't stay mad at you
Gaiman: perhaps, ray, there is room in the world of imagination for the both of us
Gaiman: in fact, maybe there's room for ALL who seek to fly on the wings of a shared dream!
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Illustration for Edgar Allan Poe's :'The Raven' by Gustave Dore, 1883
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Midnight Pals: Bigfoots
Brian Keene: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of crazy bear valley
Keene: so these no-good outlaws are on the run from the law
Keene: but
Keene: they take a wrong turn
Keene: into danger
King: what kind of danger?
Keene: bigfoots
Keene: its a no holds barred war to the death between cowboys and bigfoots
Keene: cowboys, of course, have the advantage of intelligence and speed, as well as firearms
Keene: but the bigfoots have the numbers
Keene: these bigfoots might just tear these cowboys to pieces
Bram Stoker: oh but cowboys!
Keene: whats the matter bram? you kill your cowboys all the time!
Stoker: yeah but
Stoker: i dunno, its different
King: how big are the bigfoots?
Keene: eh pretty normal bigfoot sized, i'd say
King: really? i expected they'd be bigger
King: what about their feet?
Keene: oh well, yeah, their feet are big
Keene: like duh
Keene: obviously
King: wait are their feet big compared to normal feet or big compared to bigfoot feet?
Keene: normal
King: so big compared to our feet?
Keene: yes i
Keene: you know the feet aren't really central to this story
Keene: ok so back to the story
King: wait a second is it bigfoots or bigfeet?
Poe: obviously, it's bigfoots
Barker: what? that's insane edgar. it's obviously bigfeet
King: no no i think edgar's right on this one
Lovecraft: that doesn't make any sense
Keene: so back to the story
Robert E Howard: howdy pardnas
Keene: 2 Gun Bob!
King: it's 2 Gun Bob!
Lovecraft: 2 Gun Bob!
Barker: 2 Gun Bob!
Poe: whoa 2 gun bob!
Stoker: OMG! 2 Gun Bob!
Koontz: 2 Gun Bob!
Howard: i reckon i got somethin' to say on the matter
Howard: when a cowpoke is a-ridin' through bigfoot country, he's gotta have his trusty six iron on his hip
Howard: cuz ya might gotta wrassle some varmints
Keene: you sound like you've had some experience with this
Keene: with fighting bigfoots
Barker: you mean bigfeet
Keene: no
Howard: now if me an' my boys tangled with a posse of bigfoots, we'd give em a taste of the ol' pea shooter
Keene: yeah but see, there's a lot of bigfoots
Keene: way too many to shoot
Howard: i ain't a-bothered, i'm a fast draw
Howard: [twirling six shooter] possibly the fastest
JRR Tolkien: hello lads
King: JRR Tolkien! what are YOU doing here?
Tolkien: well i head something about
Tolkien: BIG FEET
Tolkien: big HAIRY feet perhaps?
Tolkien: big hairy SMELLY feet?
Tolkien: big gross hairy smelly feet with fur????
Keene: the story's not about big feet, it's about bigfoots
Tolkien:
Tolkien: oh
Tolkien: how big are the bigfoots feet?
Keene: normal sized
Tolkien: normal for us or normal for bigfoots?
Keene: you know what i'm just gonna call them sasquatchs going forward
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"And now was acknowledged the presence of the Red Death. He had come like a thief in the night. And one by one dropped the revellers in the blood-bedewed halls of their revel, and died each in the despairing posture of his fall." - The Masque of the Red Death, Edgar Allan Poe
Very excited to eventually play this guy in campaign. I probably put too much thought into him, but hey! that's what makes character creating fun!
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Telltale Heart valentine
[ID: Animated gif of a pop up card. A man sits at a table with his head in his hand, glaring down at the floorboards. As the card's pull tab is pulled the floorboards open and close reveling a heart underneath. Text above the scene reads "Thinking of You"]
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