zhulimoonn

[zhulimoonn]

why is it with men..whenever you have a feeling, it upsets them 🙄

#relationships #men #wtf #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn

[zhulimoonn]

i wanna make my simple depression meal microwave burrito

sounds so simple

it isn’t easy to do when you don’t even wanna get outta bed

it isn’t easy when you can’t navigate a way out of your head

its even harder when you live with someone

that you can’t really live with

i don’t wanna hear about all your problems

or how you victimize yourself

or how you can’t help anything

i just want a burrito

that i don’t even want

but i have to feed myself

(i actually really like these for microwave burritos)

im just depressed today

like most days

i don’t wanna interact with you

i don’t have the energy to be your diary

#idk what this is #poem #maybe #idk #depression #depressed #anxiety #social anxiety #abuse #trauma #abusive parents #abusive relationship #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #02.04.2022

[zhulimoonn]

every time i see a skinny hot bod im like damn i want that but i have to either cut out food or alcohol

#and that’s not gonna happen #lol #relatable #lazy #love myself tho #chubby #happy #joke #funny #depressed #anxiety #social anxiety #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #01.29.2022

[zhulimoonn]

[zhulimoonn]

why do we spend so much time hurting one another when we could just love..

#sad #depressed #heartbroken #ventblog #vent

[zhulimoonn]

if only i spent nearly as much time thinking about myself instead of you

#fuck

[zhulimoonn]

only god is watching and he doesn’t care 💋

#fuck it bb #do it anyway #ventblog #zhulimoonn #08.21.21

[zhulimoonn]

my family always says i dress hipster but im starting to realize they're confusing hipster for lesbian

[zhulimoonn]

“Altogether it was a very pleasant experience. The friendship of the sailors, the song of the wind in the rigging, the smell of sweat and salt and tar. Over the long days, these things slowly eased the bitterness I felt towards my ill treatment at the hands of the Maer Alveron and his loving lady wife.” - Kvothe, The Wiseman’s Fear

just got to this line and it makes me realize how different experiences can ease the bad ones.

i spent so much of my life trying to please the people in it. whether it be my family, friends, work or the relationship im in.

ive spent so many hours in agony at how im not perfect, or how ive wronged them and the things they’ve said to me or made me feel.

so many times i felt less than a person. and i kick myself now. like that was just ONE person’s feelings and opinions towards me who was expecting too much of me anyway.

if Kvothe would have cared too much about the Maer’s rep more or his relationship with him, he could have spent hours agonizing over it, instead of moving forward with his life

i wish to figure out how to do that. i guess for him it was easier since he had no choice but to keep moving forward. i know i do too but my moving forward isn’t farther than my bedroom and i think the change of scenery would have made a world of difference for me

#rambles #random thoughts #inspired #pat rothfuss #patrick rothfuss #the wiseman’s fear #the name of the wind #kvothe #life #life lessons #life could be simpler #i make it complicated #by overthinking #keep moving forward #life will surprise you #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.24.2021

[zhulimoonn]

im starting to realize that maybe my 20’s should just be for learning about myself and learning to love myself so i can one day love someone else and have a family

since 11 ive been taking love and relationships ways too seriously to the point where i don’t even enjoy them

im so sick of being this way, im so sick of feeling wronged, betrayed, cheated on or just not loved enough

it’s time to show myself the love i crave

and just have fun along the way

im so sick of life feeling so serious all the time

when it’s not...

#codependent problems #codependence #codependency #codependent #I want to be independent #abusive relationship #abuse #depressed #depression #ptsd #anxiety #loner #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.10.2021

[zhulimoonn]

ok my daily i am independent

i am independent

self love is enough

i am indepentdent

i take care of myself and others best when i put myself first

i am independent

i can do everything on my own

i am indepentdent

i am proud at how far ive come

i am indepentdent

i can take myself out on dates

i am independent

i can hold myself at night

i am independent

i can get thru panic attacks on my own

i am independent

i am independent

i am independent

i only need myself

#indepentdent #trying to be #but im #codependent #codependence #codependency #codependent problems #abuse #abusive relationship #tired #depressed #depression #anxiety #panic attacks #don’t wanna be alone #but i can be #i am independent #trying to be positive #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.10.2021

[zhulimoonn]

i kept thinking if i waited, i would have something happy to write a poem about

but my life’s always been full of people being abusive/lying to me

so i continued to write sad things

im starting to wonder,

do the people who write happy/love poems actually experience those things?

or is it all made up

to give them hope

to keep them sane..

#poetry #sad #depressed #poems #depression #anxiety #mental illness luv #mental illness #art #writing #tired #life be good plz #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.10.2021

[zhulimoonn]

i am independent

i don’t need anyone else

i am independent

it’s ok to be single

i am independent

just being with myself is good

i am independent

just loving myself (for once) is fine to do

i am independent

i can fix things with my family on my own

i am independent

i don’t need someone else to validate my worth

i am independent

i can do this all by myself

i am independent

i am independent

i am independent

#i am independent #independent #codependent problems #lie to myself until it’s true #codependence #codependency #codependent #sad #depressed #depression #abusive relationships #abuse #wanna get out #wanna be independent #i can do this #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.09.2021

[zhulimoonn]

time to stop moping

time to turn my whine blog into a blog where i lie to myself until i actually believe it

a blog where i write happy things for once

a blog that shows me im giving myself a chance again

a place where i can remind myself that i can do it

not a place for my dreadful thoughts to die

a place where i can finally feel hope again

i can do this

#positivity #positive blog #trying at least #codependent #codependence #codependency #anxiety #depression #depressed #loner #isolated #zhulimoonn #06.09.2021

[zhulimoonn]

if i was single, i could save so much money

buy myself the clothes and shoes i want

the makeup

travel to all the places i wanna go

and right now is the perfect time for me

im young, i don’t have any responsibilities

i work online

this is it

now is the time

or it’ll never happen..

#i will do it #i can do it #i believe in myself #even when i feel like i can’t #i know i can #codependence #codependency #codependent #depressed #depression #anxiety #isolation #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.09.2021

[zhulimoonn]

im gonna lie to myself everyday until it’s true

i am independent

i am independent

i am independent

i am independent

i am independent

#codependent #codependent relationships #isolated #depressed #anxiety #i am independent #this will get better #lie until you believe it #codependency #codependence #i can do whatever the fuck i want #is the attitude i want #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.09.2021

[zhulimoonn]

please something out there give me the strength to leave this relationship

me and you would be so much better off without hurting each other everyday

im sorry

i love you

#sad #depressed #relationships #abusive relationships #anxiety #abuse #tw abuse #loner #isolated #codependent #i need a friend #vent #ventblog #zhulimoonn #06.09.2021