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jakeyzzz · 8 months

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forgiven...

(angst/fluff) heeseung x f!reader oneshot

masterlist ! ♡

warnings - { mentions of cheating, mentions of alcohol and being drunk, swearing, crying, kissing, mentions of not being able to sleep }

let me know if I missed anything !

english is NOT my first language so please be nice !

🤍 1.4k words 🤍

...

You couldn't sleep. Your brain kept replaying the same scene that broke your heart into a million pieces over and over again.

You've tried to forget about it. You've tried to forget about how he left with her. You've tried to forget about how he left you behind. But it was impossible.

You were sitting on your kitchen counter late at night when you started thinking about how he must've felt in that moment. You wondered if he regretted anything. You wondered if she could make his heart beat faster than you could. You even started questioning if you were ever good enough for him. And as you were busy overthinking, you heard someone aggressively knocking on your front door. You got startled by the loud noise, and slowly started walking towards your front door before nervously looking through the peephole.

You sighed looking at the Person standing at your front door. You felt your heart clench in your chest. But you knew you needed to hear him out. You had so many questions.

You slowly opened the door, not able to look at the boy in front of you. You wanted to say something, but the words just wouldn't come out. ,,What are you doing here ?'' Heeseung leaned his body against the door, looking at you with tired eyes. He looked so exhausted. ,,I'm sorry...'' He mumbled. His voice was weak, and it was almost too hard to understand what he was saying. He was clearly suffering. But you ignored his apology. You couldn't forgive him that easily.

,,Did you drink ?''

,,No'' He lied.

Heeseung was a mess. He could barely stand by himself. He had been drinking a lot the last few days, since he couldn't deal with the pain and the regret he was feeling. But he knew alcohol couldn't solve his problems. It just made the pain more bearable.

,,Please forgive me'' Heeseung murmured, stumbling towards you. You tried to keep him up on his feet as much as you could, which was hard since he was pretty tall. So before anything else could happen, you put his arm around your shoulder and carefully lead him towards the couch in your living room. You prevented him from stumbling over his own feet a few times and had to help him sit down, but everything ended up going well.

,,You know it's not that easy, Heeseung...''

Heeseung sat on the couch with his eyes closed. You could see his lips tremble which made you realize he was trying not to cry.

,,I know I fucked up okay ? I was just being a selfish asshole in that moment but I promise I never meant to hurt you. I never wanted to lose you. My life sucks without you in it, Y/N. I'm sorry. I'm s- so sorry please come back to me...'' He begged.

,, Yes, maybe you didn't mean to hurt me. But she did ! and you let it happen. Was it worth it, Heeseung ? Did it make you feel good ? Did she give you what you hoped for ? Did you tell her the same things you told m- ''

,, Stop !'' Heeseung abruptly got up from the couch and directly looked at you as tears streamed down his face. He immediately felt bad for raising his voice at you when he was the one who messed things up. To him it felt like your words fully sobered him up.

He took a few seconds to calm down before slowly kneeling down in front of you. He gently cupped your cheeks to make you look at him, and you decided to let him. You knew he regretted everything. And you knew he was sorry. But you wanted him to feel the same amount of pain he made you go through.

,,No, Y/N. It didn't make me feel good. Doing this to you made me realize that you're way too good for me. You didn't deserve all of this. And I know I don't deserve getting you back, but I need you to give me a second chance. I love you with all my heart, and i made a huge mistake. I'm sorry, okay ? ''

Heeseung broke into tears once again as he talked.

You had to admit he was right.

He didn't deserve to get you back. But after all everyone deserves a second chance. And everyone makes mistakes. Making mistakes is a part of life. And he didn't deserve to be hated for being a simple human being. You did love him after all. Even though he hurt you, you never stopped loving him.

,,I just really hope I can trust you. You're the only one i've ever loved, Heeseung.'' You murmured with a shaky voice. Without even wasting a second, Heeseung quickly nodded his head.

,,I promise you can. I won't hurt you again...''

,,Good because if you do, I don't think I'll be able to forgive you.''

Heeseung let out a relieved sigh before finally pulling you into his arms. He missed you so much. You gently wrapped your arms around his neck, breathing in his comforting scent.

Oh, you missed him so goddamn much.

,,i'm so sorry... '' Heeseung whispered, softly crying into your neck. You placed a gentle kiss on his temple as you caressed the back of his head delicately. Heeseung was finally at peace, and he knew the sleepless nights were finally over.

,,It'll be okay. I love you...'' You said. Heeseung weakly smiled at you when you gently wiped his tears away with your thumbs. He closed your eyes at your touch, feeling incredibly happy to have you back.

,,Y/N ?''

,,Yes ?''

,, ...Can I kiss you ?''

You smiled softly.

,, Please do...''

And then, your lips finally met. Your face was cupped in his hands as he kissed you slow and gentle. You wrapped your arms around his neck in order to pull him even closer to your body, which made Heeseung smile into the kiss. He carefully pulled you onto his lap and gently ran his hand over your thigh, then over your hip and eventually over your waist before wrapping his arm around it. He traced his tongue over your bottom lip before slowly deepening the kiss, making you feel butterflies in your stomach. Your hands were rested on his chest when he kissed you with more passion. He needed you to know how much he loved you.

,,No one can make me feel the way you make me feel, Y/N. ''

Heeseung whispered against your lips.

He gently brushed his lips against yours, not wanting to pull away just yet. He enjoyed your presence more than anything else.

,,Heeseung ?'' You giggled. ,,Are you okay?''

Heeseung rested his forehead against yours, not able to contain his smile.

,,Yes. I was just enjoying the moment. I'm more than okay. ''

You smiled softly before quickly placing another kiss on his lips. You realized how much you needed him. Because in the time he was gone, you simply missed everything about him. You missed his kisses, his touch, the way he smiled and even his voice. Your life sucked without him. But now he was finally back in your arms, kissing you and loving you.

,,Does your head hurt, Hee ?'' You asked, kissing his forehead softly. You knew Heeseung wasn't completely sober yet. You could tell by the way he was talking.

Heeseung sighed loudly.

,,Honestly, yeah.'' He admitted before putting his head on your shoulder. You looked at him with a soft smile on your face as you pulled him into your arms.

,,Let me take care of you alright ?'' You said, kissing the crown of his head after. Heeseung hummed tiredly. Before he could fall asleep in your arms sitting on the floor, you brought him to your bedroom.

You put a glass of water on your nightstand for Heeseung to drink before quietly getting under your blanket. Heeseung was already fast asleep. You took the chance to watch his sleeping face silently as you gently brushed your thumb over his slightly parted lips. You couldn't help but kiss him softly.

,,You mean so much to me, Heeseung. And i love you more than anyone else. I hope you know that. '' You whispered, placing another gentle kiss on his forehead.

You could see a light smile appear on Heeseung's lips.

,,I love you.'' He mumbled in his sleep, making you giggle quietly. You carefully sneaked yourself into his arms, trying not to wake him up.

,,I love you too, hee.''

And only a few minutes later, you fell asleep in his arms. And you both hoped you would wake up next to each other for the rest of your lives. You were meant to be for each other. You felt in in your hearts.

- end

...

taglist - { @aleiouvre , @wonbie ...}

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beautifulfuckup99 · 8 months

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How about a huge fight betweere reader and yoongi.

like crying and breaking stuff around the house and it was so bad that their friends had to interfer and seprate the two before more damage was done.

reader gets w panic attack and yoongi had to step in to help her

Def needing smut somewhere but you work ur magic😉

Aw, I love some good Hurt/Comfort S!X. I've got you covered.

Title: Coming Back to You...

Warning(s): Arguing, Throwing things, Hurt/Comfort, Pan!c Attacks, Angst S!X.

Author's Note: Enjoy!

******************************************

"ARE YOU THAT FUCKING DENSE?!" You scream as you grab a random dish from the table that was once set for dinner and now was a crime scene in the making.

"I WAS GONNA TELL YOU!" Yoongi screams back, just as frustrated as you, and that only made you angrier.

"We would like to inform our fans that 'SUGA' has initiated the military ENLISMENT process?!" You recite the beginning of the letter, seeing red. "And where was my letter, huh?!" You snap as you throw the dish at the nearest wall. Yoongi frowns at that and your friends, that had come over to comfort you, jump at the sound of ceramic plates breaking. This was like the third thing you throw...

"'Oh, ARMY, don't worry. Suga will be back in no time'." You mock the letter. "And what about ME? Hm? Cause last time I fucking checked, I'm your GIRLFRIEND! And I had to find out about you leaving ONLINE?!" You scream in pure rage.

"Maybe because you're never around! Always fucking working, we barely talk anymore!" Yoongi shouts, voice hoarse from the argument that's going on a whole hour now, with no sight of stopping. Why would it stop? Both of you felt wronged here. Your friends share a fearful look. A two-year relationship was breaking down in front of them. All because of a few months apart.

You had been busy at work, but when you left for a work trip, you didn't expect to come back to news of Yoongi, who'd also been busy on tour, announcing his enlistment in the military. You let it slide in the beginning. Him traveling for tour and interviews. and never being able to pick up a call. Distance made the heart grow founder, right? But you should've known that stepping back from this relationship for work would be like leaving a slab of meat out in the sun. It would rot away...

"That wasn't just me!" You argue as Yoongi glares at you. "How fucking dare you enlist without talking to me first!" You say as you take a step closer.

"How fucking dare I?! Are you my fucking mother!" He snaps back. "You weren't around! You weren't-" Yoongi licks his lips and pushes his sweaty black hair back from his red face when you cut him off.

"Give me a fucking break! Don't you dare blame this shit on me!" You scream. Yoongi opens his mouth, but you keep going. "I am not one of your fucking fans, Yoongi. And you're not just 'Suga'. You are mine! Mine! How dare you make this choice on your own! Fuck you!" You scream in anger, your heart pounding against your chest. Yoongi turns and punches the nearest wall, making your friends move closer to you both. You had originally decorated this house with the intention of welcoming your boyfriend home, but after word broke, your friends were quick to come over for support. Now they were clearly working as a barrier between you two.

"You were never fucking around! You haven't been around! Every time I called or skyped, nothing! How could I tell you anything when you basically fucking ghosted me! I don't need your permission, this is my life!" He shouts and you stare at him, your face hard.

"Your life? You know what? Yeah. It's your life, and I hope you have a good one, you dick. Cause I'm fucking done!" You say. Yoongi pauses at that and looks at you for a moment before shaking his head in disbelif.

"S-She doesn't... Mean that." Your friend tries as Yoongi looks at you in hurt and anger.

"You know what? I'm done too. Have a great fucking life, Y/N." Yoongi says angrily before storming out, slamming the front door behind him. Your friends watch you closely as you breakdown. With him gone, you now had time to go through what was just said.

"Y/N...?" Your friend whispers as you start panicking. This couldn't be the end...

********************************************

Yoongi comes back to the house the second one of your friends was able to pull away from your hyperventilating form long enough to call him. You laid on the bed, wrecked with sobs and your chest felt tight and your heart was racing so fast, you thought it was gonna explode.

There's a knock on the bedroom door and your friend sits up, eyeing Yoongi wirly. "You shouldn't-" He cuts her off. "Get out." He says shortly, making her pause but slowly agree. She gets up and leaves you alone.

"Baby." Yoongi whispers as you cry quietly in your pillow. "Y/N." He whispers.

"No!" You wheeze out. He walks over to the bed and grabs you. You try pushing him away, but he's too firm. He pulls you against his chest and you give in, letting him hold you.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I dropped the ball..." He whispers. "I should've told you. I should've never..." He shuts his eyes. "I just wanted to get it out of the way. I'm so sorry..." He whispers as he rubs your back.

"I'm gonna miss you more." You whine softly as you hold his shirt tight.

"I know, baby. I'm so sorry." He sighs. "I... I won't be leaving yet." He tries as you just shut your eyes, trying to calm your panic down.

"I don't wanna break up..." You sniffle and Yoongi makes you look at him. "I'm sorry I said that-" He cuts you off.

"We both said dumb shit. I... I wouldn't have let you go even if you did mean it though. I love you, Y/N. I should've made it work more. But don't think it's cause I don't love or care. I will always love and care about you. About us." He whispers and you take your first deep breath in who knows how long.

"I love you..." You whisper quietly, too weak to speak at a normal volume anymore. Yoongi leans down and kisses you slowly and softly.

You kiss back slowly and it deepens with neither of you knowing fully who did it. "Let me show you... How sorry I am." Yoongi whispers as he strokes your cheek. "Please?" He whispers and you slowly nod, knowing you both needed to feel loved. He carefully lays you back and you sniffle, needing to feel close to him again. It's been months apart.

It's quiet as you both undress each other. It feels tense with different emotions thick in the air. It feels important. Like something you have to do. You have to prove to each other that you still love each other. Yoongi takes his time to kiss along your body, whispering all the little things he's missed the most about you. You lay back, eyes shut as you just enjoy his lips on you.

Slowly, he works his way down your body and to your legs. He holds them over his shoulder and nuzzles into your inner thigh. "I missed you..." You pant quietly, relaxing more into the sheets as you feel him start to kiss along your wet slot, up and down, making you moan softly, hand going to his hair, easing his headache from arguing earlier.

"Yoongi..." You breathe out as he softly starts to lap at your clit, letting you grind your cunt against his mouth. He was always a fan of tasting you, but tonight... Tonight you knew he was trying to prove a point. That he couldn't live without you.

"Mm..." He mumbles as he wraps his lips around your clit. "I'm the luckiest man on earth." He whispers before he goes back to sucking on your clit, making you moan as your back aches on instinct. You tug at his hair.

"W-Why?" You gasp out as he flicks your clit with his tongue. "Because I get to taste you..." He mumbles against your clit before going back to passionately sucking and lapping at your clit. "Mm... You're my goddess..." He mumbles, his mouth getting wet as he devours you, making you a weak moaning mess.

"I'm sorry for being gone..." He pants against your clit, having the statement come out muffled as he focuses on tonguing your clit faster before sloppily sucking on it some more.

"Baby!" You moan out as you grind faster against his face. "Mm... But I..." He pants. "I'm gonna make it up to you..." He breathes out as your back aches, a whine leaving your throat. "Use me. You can use me..." He mutters as his hand moves down to palm at his dick through his boxers, making you moan louder.

"I-I wanna... Cum on your... Cock..." You gasp out urgently, making him nod fast. He kisses up your body hurriedly and catches your lips in a emotional kiss. You kiss back, just needing to feel close to him again. As you two make out, he slowly slides his cock into you.

"It feels amazing... inside you." He mumbles against your lips as you pull back to moan loudly.

"I-I missed this!" You whimper as he makes you look at you before he starts fucking you, not wanting to waste time or hold back. There was this urgency in the air. An unspoken need to feel good after months of feeling terrible. "M-My Yoongi..." You cry out. That felt like the only thing your brain could register right now...

"Baby. My baby. I-I'm so... I'm sorry..." Yoongi moans in your ear as he starts to pound you. There was no holding back now. No thought of your friends downstairs hearing you. No thought about the fight or the mess that awaited you or the hole he'd put in the wall out of anger, because right now the only thing that mattered was you two. Just you two...

"I don't know... What I must've done... In a past life to have you. But I'm so... Grateful." Yoongi pants out as he makes you look at him by gripping your hair hard. Your eyes roll back as you moan out louder.

"You... You can't... Leave me!" You cry out as you throw your head back while Yoongi marks your neck with bite marks. "Oh god! Oh god!" You finally say.

"I'm not leaving. Never. Cum, baby. Do it..." Yoongi whispers against your neck, fucking you like a Fein. He was addicted. And he knew that face you were making. You were close...

"I-I'm cumming, I'm cumming, I'm cumming..." You chant as you begin to shake in pleasure and Yoongi doesn't let up.

"I love you. I love you, baby. I love you..." He whispers with this quiet urgency to make you believe those words... Every time he said it, it was like a promise. A promise to be there, a promise to come back to you, a promise to never hurt you like he did tonight.

"Every second... Of every day. Oh, you have no idea... How much I... I..." You make Yoongi look at you as the tears form in his eyes. This wasn't just sex. This was a healing process.

"I know. I know, baby. I-I love you..." You whine softly, willing to go all night, because this feeling... Was addictive...

"I'm so close..." Yoongi pants as he grips your body more, not wanting this to end. It melts your heart...

"Baby! Baby! Cum! Cum, please..." You cry out, making him groan more.

"You want me to cum inside? You want me to breed you, baby?" He shivers as he sits up on his knees, picking you up, hands tight around your hips, and you know they'll be bruises there in the morning, and you don't care. Not when you felt so lightheaded...

"Yes! Cum! Breed me, baby... Please! All for me." You whine as your head rolls back while he forces your hips down on his cock faster.

"Y/N!" He moans out as he cums hard inside on you and you grind hard on him, hands gripping his shoulders as you milk him.

"More! More!" You whine as he lays back, letting you take over now. You two were nowhere near done...

**********************************************

"You promise it'll just be office?" You whisper as you lay your head on Yoongi's chest, fingertips tracing the scratch marks that littered his pale skin thanks to you. You would feel bad, but... Your skin looked like you were his personal chew toy, so... Call it even.

"I promise. Even if it was an average enlistment, it's not like I'm heading off to war." He snorts and you lightly slap his stomach, making him chuckle.

"I don't care. I'm not a fan, no matter what it consists of." You sigh before looking at him. "Just... You have to come back to me." You whisper and he looks at you lovingly.

"Of course, I will. You're home, Y/N. I'll always come back." He says softly as you shut your eyes in peace.

#bts fic #bts army #bts imagine #bts suga #min yoogni #suga imagine #suga x reader #yoongi #bts

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n0vabug · 10 months

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I never meant for this to happen

So basically this story is about the reader and Sam fighting because Sam wants to leave NY, and then she says something that makes the reader really upset and the reader tells Sam to leave, then Sam feels bad and tries to call the reader but the reader doesn't answer and Sam goes back, turns out the reader was attacked by ghostface and then there is more that I don't want to spoil 👍👍

This Contains: Fights scenes, blood, gore, angst, fluff, mentions of depression and mental illnesses, and more, if any of these make you uncomfortable, I recommend that you do NOT read this!! Also if I write in bold in the story, that means ghostface is talking. Words: 1573

Y/N'S POV "PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE SAM, WE JUST MOVED HERE AND BECAME FRIENDS WITH ANIKA AND ETHAN AND QUINN, PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE ME SAM, BY LEAVING NEW YORK, YOURE LEAVING ME, TARA, CHAD, MINDY, AND EVERYONE ELSE." Tears were forming in my eyes as I spoke, I was upset, I knew that I shouldn't have yelled but I did anyways. She was trying to leave again, but this time, I didn't want to leave, I wasn't going to leave and I told her that, she promised no matter what happened, we wouldn't leave again, I can't believe her.

"I HAVE TO YOU DONT GET IT, I DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH THIS ALL OVER AGAIN, I JUST CANT Y/N, YOU COULD COME WITH ME." Sam said, I honestly felt bad for her but why couldn't she just ignore it, I honestly was mad, but sad?? Idk I just wasn't happy about this, I also hate yelling and fighting, which made me feel even worse.

"HOW DO WE EVEN KNOW THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH US, WE HAVE NO IDEA, ITS HALLOWEEN, PEOPLE ARE GONNA DRESS UP AS GHOSTFACE, ESPECIALLY SERIAL KILLERS, PLEASE DONT LEAVE SAM, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU." Warm tears were streaming down my face as I spoke, my voice broke mid sentence and I was trying so hard not to just completely break down.

"Y/N, YOU DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND THAT WE COULD DIE BECAUSE OF THIS, YOURE TOO BUSY BEING DEPRESSED ZONING OUT ALL THE TIME TO EVEN NOT....ice, shit i'm so sorry I swear I didn't mean it." She paused when saying notice, she realized she messed up by saying that. But did she just bring up my fucking mental illnesses, wtf. The warm tears stopped as I looked at her with betrayal and sadness in my eyes, why would she fucking bring that up. I think she quickly noticed what she said too because she looked at me with pure regret and sadness.

"Get out sam." I didn't even hesitate to say that, I truly loved her and didn't want her to leave NY, but I needed her to leave my apartment, I couldn't be around her at the moment. "No, wait, I'm sor-" "GET THE FUCK OUT SAM." I know it was wrong of me to yell, again, but it worked because she walked out as quickly as she could. The second she slammed the door, warms tears were pouring out of my eyes again and I couldn't breath, I love my girlfriend so much, but why would she say that, I know she didn't mean it, but still. I walked out of the living room, and walked into my room, trying to calm myself down.

After 5 minutes, I get a call from an unknown number, I quickly try to calm myself so I sound like I wasn't just crying, so I pick up. "Hello?" I said "Hello Y/n" The voice is a bit familiar, too familiar, and not the good type. "Who is this?" I quickly asked. "Are you a little upset Y/n, poor sam, she was only trying to protect herself from getting killed, she didn't want to deal with this a second time, but you took it the wrong way. Shut her out. Didn't even give her a chance to apologize, now poor sam, she's out on her own, what if she gets butchered all because of you, y/n." Shit. Shit. Shit.

Next thing I know I'm running out of my room, towards the door. I can't let Sam die, she's one of the few people who stayed after finding out about my past and my problems. I had to get to her.

Next thing I know, a cold metal blade was pressed into my thigh, with a guy in a black costume and white mask. I screamed as blood dripped down my thigh and bled through my jeans. I then felt the metal enter my stomach 3 times, then get twisted, I screamed as loud as I could, hoping someone would hear me. "Any last words, Y/n" "Is sam ok?" I struggled to speak but managed to get those words out, I truly needed to know if Sam was okay. I needed her to be okay. The guy in the mask then stabbed me in the shoulder one last time. My eyes felt heavy and fluttered close until all I saw was darkness...

SAM'S POV I left the apartment, tears streaming down my face. I didn't mean it. I love her more than anything, and I did not mean what I said. She is the greatest person I know, even if she did have some problems, but so did I, and we were overcoming our problems together, she didn't leave me even after she found out about Billy, I didn't even think about leaving her after finding out about her mental illnesses, so after we moved to NY, I could tell she was happier and getting better, and I know me leaving, broke her heart, I could see the sadness in her eyes and the tears streaming down her face during the argument. I had to go back.

I started walking back towards her apartment and as I did, I picked up my phone trying to call her, even after arguments that we had, she always answered my calls, she was really quick at answering because she always had her phone on her at all times, but this time, she didn't pick up. So I called again. no answer. I was starting to worry, maybe she was just really mad and still wanted to answer, but I was still worried. I started walking quicker until it turned into me running. I had the key to my girlfriend's apartment since she had a spare, and since I practically lived there. I unlocked the door. "Y/n?" I look around until I see something that I wish was a dream. Her lifeless body. In a pool of red liquid. "Y/n?" Tears formed in my eyes. "Y/N PLEASE WAKE UP!" I called 911, as I talked on the phone, I broke down, tears streaming down my face. This is all my fault.

I tried putting pressure on her wounds, but the bleeding didn't stop and the paramedics were taking to long. I picked her up, her cold lifeless body in my arms, her apartment was on the fifth floor, I had to run down the stairs with her, as I ran down the stairs I yelled for help. "HELP" "SOMEONE PLEASE HELP!!" I kept saying, until I reached the ground floor, where I met with the paramedics.

They put her onto a stretcher, bandaged her wounds as much as possible, and then put her into the ambulance. I got in the ambulance with her, and held her cold but soft hand the whole way there. I felt terrible, I never meant for any of this to happen.

We arrived at the hospital and they took her in to get stitches since her wounds were deep, so I had to sit in the waiting room until they called my name. After about 45 minutes I got called to the back, "Samantha Carpenter, Y/n L/n is out of surgery, she isn't awake but if you want, you can go wait in her room until she is." "Thank you, I'll go wait with her, what's her room number." I'm glad she was alive, I still feel terrible, all I felt was guilt, if I didn't argue with her and if I just chose to stay in NY, maybe none of this would have happened. "314." Said the lady at the front desk, I walked to room 314, my footsteps grew quicker within each step I took.

I finally reached her room, I opened the door, and pulled a chair next to her bed. She was still asleep, I hated seeing her like this, I just can't help but think this is all my fault. I sat beside her bed, with my head down and one hand on the bed. After a few minutes, I felt a warm and soft touch on top of my hand, I look up, her beautiful y/e/c (your eye color), eyes were looking directly at me, while she was smiling.

"Omg, Y/n, thank god you're okay, I was so worried, I thought you weren't gonna make it, listen I'm so sorry, I never meant for any of this to happen, this is all my fault, I never wanted to leave NY, and especially leave you, I don't think I will leave NY now because I need to keep you safe, but I shouldn't have argued or even yelled, and I feel especially terrible for bringing up the mental health thing, I didn't mean it I swear, I promise you that I never meant to hurt you, I'm so sorry, ple-" I was ranting until I felt her soft lips press against mine, we kissed until we both ran out of breath. "I forgive you sam, I know you didn't mean it, I love you so much" She pulled me into a kiss again, this time a quicker one. "I love you more, I'm never leaving you again." I said, before I hugged her, I hugged her tighter than I ever have before, but also tried avoiding her injuries while hugging her, I love her to the stars and beyond.

A/N I wrote this whole thing while being half a sleep, and really distracted because my bsf was over while I wrote this and I kept pausing in the middle so we could talk to each other. I can't really tell if I like this or not, I don't 100% love the little fight scene at the beginning but idk, there are things that I could fix with both of them. Idk but let me know if you want anymore, also thank you to whoever reads these because I think these are shitty a lot of time and seeing that people actually read this makes me happy so thank you so much!! <3

UPDATE: I HATE THIS SM, THE FIGHT SCENE IS LOWKEY STUPID BC I DON'T THINK SAM WOULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT, BUT HERE IS ANOTHER ONE FROM WATTPAD THAT WAS MADE IN MAY😭😭

#sam carpenter x reader #sam carpenter x female reader #sam carpenter x fem reader #samantha carpenter x reader #sam carpenter #anika kayoko #anika kayoko x reader #mindy meeks x reader #mindy meeks martin #sidney prescott #sidney prescott x reader #tatum riley #tatum riley x reader

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luveternals · 7 months

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paring: Konig x rebel male reader. cw: dystopia AU, friends to enemies to implied lovers(? bruh the 1st draft —sneak peak link— is literally gone, I don't know what happened bewteen that and the 2nd one T^T), war, violence and all that stuff, angst (ya, that's the only thing that didn't change lmao). ~ ~ ~

Should you really? Follow the order? Go through with the mission? Make the Empire pay for all it did?

The longer you wait for someone to give you an answer, the greater your hesitation grows. Because your brothers are dying, your sisters are crying, your family is losing.

It started raining at some point, droplets growing heavier and angrier the further you move down the alley. You were drenched to the bone when you finally realize it, nose assaulted by the stench of wet, filth and death. It was a trap. And they knew.

They sent you all out anyway.

You're alone now, the last — the only one — of the team still standing. You don't know where anyone else is. Your feet drag against the slippery asphalt, body weighted down but the leaking wound stabbing pain down your leg. The end of your gun scratching against the floor as you stumble forward.

When you raise your head, you find a man looming at the end of the alley, rifle aimed in your direction. His face is hidden, the rain only adding to the mystery of the veil he's wearing.

You've lost sensation on one arm and the other shakes with effort as you raise your own rifle.

“Out of my way.”

He's silent as he watches you, grip steady around his weapon, body a large and unmovable obstacle you know you'll never surpass.

“Outta my way!” you shout and your voice cuts through the howl of the storm raging around you, “either kill me or leave!”

Instead, he relaxes his stance, lowers his gun and, without any hint of hesitation, removes his head gear.

Despite the lack of protection on his head, the image that presents itself before you is one of a machine built to fight until his heartbeat is forcefully put to a stop.

It's not that sight that makes you drop to your knees, but the way he drops his shoulders as if to curl into himself. The way he lets everything he's holding fall to the ground, hands raising to show their palms to you.

It's the perfect replica of that day. Different weather, alley, clothes on your back. But it's the same exact scene, the same exact veil covering his face, the same worried posture dragging his body down and making him seem smaller. The same indecipherable spark shining in his eyes.

“I can't stop now,” you say, voice nothing more than a whisper. You don't know if he heard but don't have the strength to do anything about it.

He kneels next to you — you don't know when he managed to come close to begin with — and carefully takes your hands in one of his, other hand already opening his medikit.

Your senses are blinded by pain and you hear him mumble something. It sounds like an apology and it sounds strangely familiar too, as if he actually cares that your hurting despite having met you only once before.

Your adrenaline runs out eventually and the last thing you wonder before blackness takes over is if you'll ever meet your Engel again.

The sun is hot against the back of your neck, scalding your skin as you scurry your way through the street. You’ve gathered all you could find on your way to the shelter, but when you look at what you're carrying, it feels too little.

It's never enough anyway.

Angel is the only good thing you’ve got left in this world, and this is your offering to him. An apology for the loss and pain the two of you had been put through.

You were blessed with him keeping his bubbly cuteness and innocent mind despite it all. This offering is a gesture of gratitude for him coming into your life. And finally, a desperate request for him to forever be by your side.

You find him sitting on a low wall near the entrance of the building, head bobbing side to side and little feet kicking under him as he hums to himself.

His eyes are bright when they fall on you and his grin is nothing but blinding. Whatever protest you had about him being alone and so in the open dies with a sputter when he throws himself at you, face smushed into your stomach.

“Can I come with next time, pretty please?” his voice is small pressed against your clothes, and when he looks up his eyes are so big and round, and you know it would physically hurt you to say ‘no’.

The soldier kneels beside the little girl, massive hands cupping hers so gently, the weapons he's carrying positioned away from her sight.

She sniffles and he shushes her, bringing her hands up to encourage her to wipe her tears away. He takes out his medical kit and uses it to clean the scrap on her knee. Once he's done with her little injury, he bring a smile to bloom on her face with a gentle pinch on her cheek and sends her on her way.

He must be feeling the intensity of your stare, because when he raises to his feet, he turns your way and meets your eyes. His attention doesn't drop to the knife spinning between your nimble fingers. He simply raises his arms and tilts his head, shoulders hunched forward and weapon forgotten in its holster.

You don't have to kill him — your objective is to send the nearby base into a bit of a panic — and despite his massive stature he doesn't seem like a threat (not after what he's done for the little girl). But he saw your face. Or rather, he seems fixated by it. There's a look in his gaze that you're not sure how to decipher, his eyes seem brighter than what they've been a second ago.

You decide to just get out of here and not look back.

This is a route you’ve become quite familiar with. You know how to keep out of the way, how to mind your own business and not get involved, which turns to take to avoid trouble, which alley to stir clear from to avoid danger.

What your years of going through this part of the city taught you was that bringing a child along requires quite a bit of adjusting to keep safe. And he’s a good boy, he knows when to follow directions without complaint. What you didn’t take into consideration was his curiosity peaking at the thought of this new adventure.

You’d looked away for a second. To make sure you were going the right way.

One single second.

There's a wet stain on the page, smearing ink and ruining the paper. You've crumpled and smoothed the letter over and over, read the words until you've imprinted them into the forefront of your mind. Still, today they hit differently. Stronger than the first time you've opened the envelope five years prior.

You've been assigned to your first official mission since you've joined the rebellion.

There's never been a chance to turn back on your decision. To undo them and remake them so they turn out right. And this won't be the first time you've gone out of your way to cause trouble to the Empire. The first time you'll hurt someone. Willingly or not.

It will be the first official action you'll take against power. Openly calling out your desire for disobedience. Destruction. Change.

You can't undo your decisions now whether you want it or not.

But it doesn't matter because Angel might have betrayed you by leaving for them but you're still doing this for him, aren't you?

You blink and when you find the letter in your hands, you wipe your face dry with a hand as you pocket it and take your pistol instead, so you can load it.

He's lost his spark.

He tries to hide it, chubby little face forced into a straining smile. He winces as the expression pulls at his split lip.

You hold him close to your chest, whitening grip so tight your muscles ache. You don't let go, instead whisper apologies against the crown of his head.

“Shouldn't have let you come,” you say again and again. “if the guards had cared at all—”

“If the guards had cared at all—”

“Again with this?” Angel went through a growth spurt last summer, sending him to stand taller than you now, despite being younger. Still, he sits on your bed with his shoulders hunched over, hands wringing as he stares at you in exasperation as you stomp around the room. “It's not the guards’ fault. They weren't the only people there that day.” he says, “you can't blame everything on the Empire.”

You flinch at the words and spin to glare at him, “what?”

“I—,” he drops his gaze and does his best to avoid meeting your eyes. You see a frown settle on between his eyebrows and your cursing yourself.

You sit beside him and gently pull him closer so he can hide his face against your shoulder. “I'm not… I could never be mad at you, mein engel. I'm sorry for snapping. It's just— we were just children when they took everything from us.”

He doesn't answer and just turns his head to press it against your neck. You shift and hide your own face against the crown of his head. The angle is awkward and quite uncomfortable and it forces you to realize how he's not a little boy anymore.

He mumbles something. It sounds like an apology so you shush him.

The next morning he's gone, a letter with your name on it the only evidence of him left behind.

~ ~ ~ a/n: this took an exaggerated over-complicated turn lmao I know it's a little twisty so tell me if it's a hit of miss x3 I'll keep the sneak peek as a reminder draft 1 was kinda good too lol disclaimer: as per usual I don't know bananas about cod or the military. sorry... *sweats*

#story day #konig #x top male reader #call of duty #top male reader #dom male reader #male reader #cod x reader #konig cod #konig x reader #konig call of duty

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villainessxassassin · 2 years

Note

Hi! I'm happy your requests are open and i saw You're Ok with angst, so is it possible to request a Riddle x Reader where he's in his overbolt form and says veery bad things to mc (who confessed feelings not long ago) about said confession like "you never were enough" or "how could i like someone like you" BUT AFTER THE OVERBOLT HE DOESNT REMEMBER HE SAID THEM and Trey has to tell him

"The faint feeling of a flower adorned in thorns whenever I look at him."

riddle x reader (angst)

You don't know how happy it makes me to finally write angst again— For you though, I hope your heart aches after reading this, in a good way i mean <3 - kishira

IF THIS FLOPS IMMA CRY CUZ I ACTUALLY ALREADY CRIED WHILE WRITING THIS

Warnings: ooc? Riddle, saying very mean words

A rose covered in thorns was never meant to be held by the naked hand, yet you tried to remove each individual spike, resulting in scars to appear one after another.

Riddle wasn't himself. From tables being flipped over to the garden of roses being diminished to nothing but shaved leaves and broken petals. You knew something had to be done, but you were foolish enough to have presented your feeling so out in the open, thinking this would be the solution.

"Pathetic"

The first thorn emerges

"Is this your way of ridiculing me? Am I to find what you said humorous?" Despite his words he lets out a high pitched laugh.

It grates your ears and accompanied by the mocking smile he sent your way, it made your heart clench, but it wasn't the same feeling that was accompanied by butterflies in your stomach. This... this one hurt.

"What makes you think I would even want to reciprocate, let alone want to accept your confession? Why don't you save it for someone that would actually want to be around your bothersome self— and I couldn't give a care in the world about what trifling feelings you have instore."

Bothersome. Was this how Riddle viewed you all this time? You couldn't help but look back on the times you spent together, to the days you'd spent hours at the library as he'd help you with an upcoming test, or the times when you'd meet up at the rose garden to snack on sweets.

"You were a thorn at my side, or rather a pesky weed in my rose garden." He picked up a rose that was incomplete of being colored fully red, as white still poked at the bottom of the petals. "A temporary thing that in the end was made to be disposed of", he said altogether while crushing the rose in the palm of his hand, disintegrating it in the process. He didn't hold back on his words, venom coating each insult that was thrown at you. You winced as your vision started to blur.

"You were never enough"

"How could I ever begin to like someone like you"

this was too much for your poor heart to take.

And yet you listened, hoping that he'd change his mind and take back what he said, but never once did he look apologetic. Those eyes that were devoided by the care and love you once knew, only staring back at you like the dark abyss, and before you knew it the atmosphere had completely changed.

Time seemed to pass without your knowledge as the sky reverted back to its regular blue color and the air wasn't suffocating to inhale anymore. Students and close friends quickly surrounded the heartslabyul dorm head, worrying for his wellbeing as he slowly regained his consciousness.

Trey and the others were just about to go check on you but you've already been long gone from the scene. You weren't able to see what happened next, yet you couldn't bring yourself to care for the time being as you were slowly retreating back to your own dorm. Who could blame you? with a rejection paired with unkind words towards your person— how could you even begin to care about that person?

*.✧

After Riddle fully recovered from the overblot incident and went back to his regular classes he couldn't help but feel like something was missing.

To be more specific, this something was a someone, and to be even more specific- ah, that's right, where are you? Y/n, you being nowhere in his line of sight seemed off to him. There are times when he'd give quick glances your way to take a peek at your lovely face, masking it with the excuse of making sure you were paying attention to the teacher, but today he comes face to face with your empty seat.

He would have let this slide for the time being if it wasn't for the fact that your bag was present in the classroom, and the class has been going on for quite some time now, so wherever it was that you were, you should have made it back by now.

This was the last subject of the day so after class got dismissed he waited in the classroom since he's got some time left to spare before his housewarden duties await him. It almost took about an hour before he could hear the very faint tiptoed footsteps from outside the classroom.

You'd made the decision of avoiding Riddle for a little while until he got the message that you didn't want to talk or even be near him, so why was he right there in an empty classroom when class was already over? None of your concern, most certainly. Good for him he's finally healed and ready to prance over flower fields and attend tea parties again with a smile on his face, but you are not. So with a quick frown plastered across your face you made a quick beeline towards your bag.

Given you didn't glance once Riddle's way he thought you weren't aware of his presence, so he decided to break the silence.

"Greetings to you as well. Excusing your lack of awareness for your surroundings I-" his half joking sentence was caught off by the sound of you rummaging through your bag, seeming to not care that he was present in the room with you. It seems you were in a hurry, but shouldn't he still get a welcome back for the many days you guys haven't seen each other? He didn't mean to assume or anything, but the reaction he'd expected from you when you saw him was one where you'd leap in to his personal space and ask if he was okay or if he was still hurt, and surely not this.

It's when you fully turned around that Riddle decided to reach out to you. "Hey", no response. His irritation was starting to become more visible with each passing second you weren't paying attention to him.

"When someone's talking it's only common sense you listen to what they have to say, so why-", when he finally reached you he was shocked with how quickly you shrugged off the hand he had placed on top of your shoulder, and in response he flinches. Why were you acting this way?

"And when someone's trying to ignore you, it's also only common sense you leave them be." a glare is accompanied by your statement. The fact that he didn't even begin with an apology about the hurtful things he said was proof that he really didn't give a damn about you.

You added hardening the glare you already had on and tears of frustration threatening to fall, "If you're not going to apologize for the awful and hurtful words you said that day, I don't see a need to continue this conversation any further."

Despite Riddle's unknown confusion to what you just said, he made sure his words came out straight and clear. Yes, he couldn't remember what he said or even a whole of what happened during his time that he overblotted, but a few of his close friends and classmates approached him recently just fine, so he took in what you said as just exaggeration.

His pride was another thorn added.

"I clearly wasn't in my right state of mind, You would've known this if you read on more about overblots, and what's more is that you're being childish! What I said couldn't have possibly left such a negative mark for you to act this way." This wasn't a fight, yet he still couldn't loose, he wasn't raised that way. He was assertive, and quick to harden his resolve that he was always in the right. Perhaps if he knew then maybe there was still time.

But as we all know, time waited for no one

He was insulting you all over again, even now. Childish? And were your feelings that insignificant that he'd pass them on like a small scratch that would soon be forgotten? Your final breaking point has been reached.

"Just shut up! shut it! I can't handle this anymore..."

You collapsed to the floor crying, screaming with every word till your voice started to crack. Riddle was stunned, scared by your sudden breakdown. Starting to regret how mean and inconsiderate his words came out. He went up to comfort you, but you flinched at his touch, inching away ever so slowly as only anger and sadness was all he could see swirling in your eyes. He couldn't move, your words still trying to register in his head as at the same time you decided you just need to get away from all this, from him.

After you had run off faster than the sound of ace and deuce causing a ruckus in nrc could be heard, Riddle stayed there stunned for an extra more amount of seconds before he himself quickly began to run in the directions of heartslabyul dorm. He couldn't care less if he was breaking more than a few rules right of this moment. HECK, he could care less about ANY rules because right now what he needed were answers.

It was clear how you had no intentions of hearing him out, so instead of chasing after a problem he wouldn't have had a proper response to, he decided to search for a different answer. Unfortunately, those answers have been received far too late, after hearing everything he needed to know from Trey, he already knew how much he's messed up.

Perhaps if he wasn't so insistent that he'd keep quiet about his feelings, maybe if he'd opened up to you more, maybe if he wasn't so prideful, maybe if he'd confessed how he felt to you first, it wouldn't have manifested into something his overblot form would have taken out so negatively on you. Maybe you both would have still had a chance.

He'll keep trying for days, weeks even, but there are times where something broken can't always be fixed, or perhaps you chose not to be mended, scared to be broken all over again.

You freed yourself from the wounding flower, scars from the thorns still linger, a feeling you'll never be able to forget whenever you look at him.

____

Gwen: Dayumn this is the first time where I didn’t indulge Kishira with Angst scenarios.

Request open!(until August 20 only!)

#twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twst x y/n #twisted wonderland x mc #twisted wonderland x yuu #twisted wonderland x you #twst x yuu #riddle rosehearts x reader #riddle rosehearts #riddle rosehearts angst #angst #I probably made this angstier than I intended but what do you think

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bajibitch · 1 year

Text

Interviewing the cast. actor au.

Ken, Nahoya, Rindou, Yuzuha, Souya, and Tetta

⚅ Ken ⚅

“How do you feel about the fans reactions to your character?”

“I’m the nice guy without weird intentions. I’m the one they’d marry but there’s always something that holds me back, and it’s Emma.”

“I love those! Not only for the angst, but it’s also nice seeing you be a piece of shit every once in a while.”

“Do you know what I’d do to someone who constantly brings up their dead crush? Not only that but the unrealistic expectation to be like them?”

“What would you do?”

“I’d throw their ashes on them and tell them it’s never going to happen.”

“I’m dead!” You smacked the armrest and leaned back in your chair cackling. “Leave the ashes alone.”

“No, a point has to be made.” He said. “But that’s better than beating someone after they lost their sister.”

“Your character lost a lot of my love and respect in that scene! Like, yes he loved her, but that was Manjiro’s sister at the end of the day!”

“I was surprised many people still loved him. That was a hard scene for me to shoot because Manjiro is a good actor. I felt bad swinging at him while he had that look on his face.”

“We know you cry during movies, so this wouldn’t be any different. It’d make sense if it was harder since you’re compassionate.”

“I had to give him a hug after we shot that scene.”

“How do you relate to your character?”

“My mouth gets me into a lot of trouble.”

“Ooo, tell me how!”

“You’re so nasty!” He laughed. “I’m talking about when I taunt people as were arguing. Like that scene where I get stabbed by Peh.”

“I knew his character wasn’t getting much love after that one.”

“It went up after he beat Shion.”

“Cause who doesn’t love a man that can knock someone out with one hit?”

“I don’t. My character got stabbed for respecting his friend's choice!”

“What would you change about your character?”

“I’d have him do his job the correct way. A lot could’ve been prevented if he spoke up, but he was like a bystander. He didn’t try hard enough for me.”

“Yeah, he just went along with it to make his friend happy. He didn’t want to go against them. It’d be fair to say he deserves some of the blame.”

“I get it wasn’t his gang, but he was high enough to give his advice and be heard.”

“He was just following the leader.”

⚄ Nahoya ⚄

“Did you miss me?” Nahoya kissed your cheek and you wiped it just as fast.

“Not really.”

“Don't be mean.”

“Last time we talked, you got me kicked out of an exclusive event.”

“I hated your plus one.”

“You could've avoided them!”

“You should've known better. I've been going back and forth with them online before the event.”

“It was a petty squabble, I thought you’d be over it. Besides it's easy to ignore them online, just block them.”

“Tell me how that block button works when people start blowing you up to hear about your night with Takemichi.”

“I didn't sleep with him.”

“I didn't say you did, but they’ll think so once I tweet it.”

“You bet-”

“Done. And you know Takemichi’s just gonna make it worst.” He laughed as your phone started to go off.

“Ugh. How do you feel about the fans reaction to your character?”

“I love that they know he's vicious and I encourage them to go darker. I love seeing the crazy shit they come up with! Hell, I add my own stories for them to enjoy.”

“Cool, what do you write? Angst, Horror...”

“Anything dark satiates my hunger. I love making the reader squirm and see my character as some monster, but I throw in some fluffy moments.”

“I have to read it sometime.” Your phone continues vibrating and chiming on the table.

“Hehehe. You gonna pick it up?”

“Shut up!” You cut your phone off and put it in your pocket.

“While we're still on it. I hate that people think he’ll just abuse the ones he loves. Like yeah he raises hell when it comes to his enemies, but he isn’t just abusing his brother.”

“You want them to see that he’s capable of love too?”

“Yeah because it adds to his character. He’s a nightmare to his enemies, but he can be a dream come true to his honey. I can be that. I’m not just a player! I love the thought of having a successful relationship!”

“Getting kinda personal aren’t ya?”

“Yes because I’m sick of people cheating on me because they think I’m cheating on them!”

“Haha, you should’ve confessed that before you sent a horde of people to harass me! But seriously, that’s not right. You should have a conversation with them at the start and be honest about your feelings.”

“No shit.”

“Smart ass. How do you relate to your character?”

“We’re everyone's obsession. I'm catnip to my peers, they can't get enough of me! If I ever stopped hanging around them they’d be devastated.”

“You're much more conceited than I remember. Is there anything you’d change about your character?”

“It's not him that's the problem. He needs more screen time and I want to see how he interacts with his twin. Or just outside of the gang shit in general.”

“That would be nice! Especially if he's much sweeter than you.”

“Eh?”

“Sou-sou said you would pick with him when you guys were younger.”

“We were kids. All kids are jerks.”

“He was an angel.”

“Have fun with the press.”

⚃ Rindou ⚃

“How do you feel about the fans reaction to your character?”

“It's funny,” he snickered into his arm. “They give me gifts because they think I get overshadowed by my brother.”

“How often do they send you gifts?”

“I'm always getting fan mail with food, letters, electronics, and accessories. You name it, I have it.”

“Can your fans cook?”

“I’ll never know. I'm not eating anything they send! If I take a bite I might see they put their hair in it or worse.”

“Makes sense, people do get attached to celebrities in an unhealthy way.”

“They do but I want them to know that, in reality, I'm the one that always got spoiled. I could do no wrong in my parent's eyes. Ran hated it, but he blamed my parents so I got to hang out with him still.”

“Aww, you wuved your big brother. He was just the coolest to you back then, huh?”

“You’re teasing, but yes, he was. I thought he was the coolest and no one could tell me otherwise. Even when he was walking around with the short hairstyle from the 1900s, I thought he badass.”

“How do you relate to your character?”

“We’re both sadistic, but that side comes out when I’m spending one on one time with a lucky person.”

“Would you ever do that with a fan?”

“They’d probably annoy me the whole time.”

“How?”

“Saying they can't believe it or asking me to say specific lines like, you're the only person I want to spend my life with. It would be fine if we were together, but they talk as if it's not a one-night stand.”

“What would you change about your character?”

“Hmm. Nothing. I like him how he is.”

“They show just enough of him and don't stretch it based of the fans reactions.”

⚂ Yuzuha ⚂

“Did you have fun with Takemichi? I heard you went home with him after the party?”

“I'm gonna wring that twerps neck if he keeps making a post.”

“He just tagged you in the latest one.”

“Ignore it.”

“He said you gave him a good time and he'd be happy to see you again!” She covered her mouth while she scanned the post. “I thought you hated him!”

“I do! He's wording it weirdly to get attention from the press!”

“Well, it’s working!” She yelled. “What’re you going to do to stop him?”

“I don't know!”

“Poor thing.”

“How do you feel about the fans reaction to your character?”

“I love that they appreciate her, but I don't think she’d agree with a lot of the things they say. I won't get into it unless it comes up later.” She waved her hand and you moved on to the next question.

“How do you relate to your character?

“I’d do anything to protect my family. Not kill them but anything else.”

“Why not?”

“I can't protect them if I'm locked up. I have to be free so I can be there for them.”

“Right. Since you're gone the offender will have a field day?”

“And we can't have that! Not everyone is strong like Taiju. My kicks will damage the average jerk bold enough to hurt my family.”

“You're just strong as your character?”

“Yep, I've always been interested in martial arts as a kid. It's lovely and dangerous depending on the fighter.”

“Is there you’d change about your character?”

“There's no way she had a shred of love for the guy who called her brother, a victim of domestic violence, a loser. That's what I was going to say earlier. I hate that people are still making statements about the situation and saying the wrong things.” She banged her fist on the table as she spoke.

“Yeah, they forget that it's a mental thing too. No matter how strong he was, he couldn't just step up to his brother. The abuser wears down your confidence until you're right where they want you.”

“Exactly! And no matter what they say, he was the youngest. As the older sibling of course I’d let him lie. With the way society is, they wouldn't care that he's the youngest or that he was scared. I wouldn't want them to know either.”

“It's bad enough he's puking blood, but you're gonna add to his trouble by calling him a loser. That helps a lot.”

“But I guess that just shows what they think about real victims because the writer did portray it well.” Her voice was much more cheerful as she gave praise.

“He did because no matter how strong you are, the chances of them being able to act like your character are lower than they think.”

“Yep, that's like when people say they could never be with someone who mistreats them but reality hits and they’re another statistic.”

“Sad really. Nothing will change if they don't try to learn the full extent of abuse and not see it as something you can just fix in a day.”

⚁ Souya ⚁

“It's nice to see you again.” He hugged you before sitting across from you. “I heard about you and Tak-”

“Lies, all lies. Let's not spread rumors. Spread the truth.” He giggled at your reaction. A flash of his silver grill blinded you for a second.

“That's why I'm here. First question.”

“How do you feel about the fans reaction to your character?”

“They’d hate me in real life because I’d...” He pressed his lips and balled his fist.

“You’d do what and why?”

“I’d be fighting because of Nahoya. It's always Nahoya. If he ever flirted with my partner, I’d beat his ass.”

“What if they were flirting, and he didn't entertain it.”

“I‘m the type to hurt those who hurt me. I don't care who you are, don't play with my heart. I don't deserve to be hurt. I'm a great lover.”

“Aww, I’d treat you nice.”

“You promise?”

“You’d want for nothing, but what else would make them hate you?”

“I don't cry every time there’s a problem. I'm vocal about my feelings and I often go too far.”

“Just like that?”

“Only if you're the reason we're arguing. If you do me dirty, I want to make you miserable.”

“I understand. That's why people take a minute to think about the situation before talking.”

“To those of you tuning in, send a text before you get home. Unless you want me to lash out.”

“Don’t warn them!”

“Either way, justice will be served.”

“Sou-sou, how do you relate to your character?”

“I love my brother.”

“Be for real.” You pushed his shoulder and he grabbed your hand.

“Welp. People think I'm rude, but unlike my character, I like it.”

“What?”

“It makes them change how they talk to me. They don't want to upset me because they think I’ll beat them up.”

“I'm sure it has its negative effects. Don't people assume you're being rude and try to argue?”

“Yeah, but I shut it down. If it escalates, that's their fault. They shouldn't assume how I am.”

“Is there anything you’d change about your character?”

“I don't know why he hasn't snapped yet.”

“Why would he? He's such a sweetie. He doesn't even like fighting.”

“He needs to start calling out his so-called friends. They treat him like a nurse but don't spend much time with him. It's obvious Nahoya’s their favorite and that hurts. Can you imagine being a twin and seeing everyone treat them better? And you're supposedly the nice one.”

“I see. Does that happen to you outside the series?”

“No, I'm loved by all my friends. Is that the last question?”

“Yep, we're all done.”

“Wanna grab something to eat?”

“After my interview with Tetta.”

⚀ Tetta ⚀

“How do you feel about the fans reaction to your character?” You asked.

“I don’t care, but it does irritate me since I know why it’s happening.” He rolled his eyes and groaned.

“What are they doing that bothers you, Tetta?”

“I feel as if people like me, who have similar experiences in life, understand what the fans are doing.”

“And what’s that?”

“You know.” He was right, but you wanted him to say it.

“I do, but some of the viewers don’t. Explain it for them.”

“Just know that if Shuji and I swapped roles, he’d have ten times the fans he does now.” The two of you laughed, the cameraman raised an eyebrow. “He’d become everyone’s favorite bad boy on screen. The viewers would make stories about him being the big bad mafia leader that takes care of them.”

“They don’t do that for you?”

“They do, but it's just a handful. However, the majority have me in their non-negotiable.”

“Meaning?”

“They won't write for my character at all. But my loyal follower, Shuji, gets a pass. He loved it a bit much, even got thrills from it, yet avoids the backlash.” You tried to hold back your laughter, but he made it hard.

“How do you relate to your character?”

“I know what it’s like to have the world against you. I grew up in a country that didn’t treat me well. It’s one thing to have other kids being mean to you, but another to have adults join in on the insults and mockery. It’s tough.”

“How did you manage to keep going and not crumble at the weight of their words?”

“My family made sure I knew that I mattered. When I would go home sad, they showed me in different ways that I’m loved. They went behind my bullies and gave me double the kindness. As a kid, it helped a lot. I’m grateful for their love and support.”

“That’s so sweet, you’re gonna make me cry.”

“I’m the one that got bullied. You just heard the story.”

“The memory has me emotional.” You fanned your face with the note cards in your hand.

“Do you want a hug?”

“From you, of course.”

“Is there anything you’d change about your character?”

“Not a damn thing.”

“Language.” You joked.

“Haha, there’s nothing to change. He’s well-written. No matter how people feel or what they say, he carries out his plan because he knows if he puts his mind to it, it’s set in stone.”

“You’d leave him with the trait that has him kill his childhood friend in every universe?”

“Yeah, that’s what gives Takemichi purpose. Speaking of Takemichi, is it true you and him-“

“Thanks for your time. Hopefully, we can chat in the future.”

“No problem, I always have time for you.”

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #draken x reader #ken ryuguji #nahoya x reader #nahoya kawata #rindou x reader #rindou haitani #yuzuha x reader #yuzuha shiba #souya x reader #souya kawata #tetta x reader #tetta kisaki

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lostinthewiind · 5 months

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I was wondering maybe a titan shifter reader, like season 1 ish era, and Jean? Angst like he sees reader die and get eaten by a titan, and the entire titan thing like Eren? If that makes sense? I haven’t asked a request in so long I’m rusty lol

Just Another Suicidal Maniac

A/N: SO glad someone requested Jean right off the bat because I'm slowly entering my Jean-girlie era and I'm down bad y'all.

Rating: PG13

Warnings: angst, major-character death, gore

"You seriously worry too much." You dusted off your pants as you stood up, grateful that the only damage done by your rough landing was a couple of bruises and scrapes.

Jean, who was in the middle of said worrying, didn't bother to inspect himself first before giving you a once-over with his wide, brown eyes. "Worry? Me?" Jean mocked before gesturing out wildly to the chaos around the two of you with his ODM blade—Titans roamed the streets freely, hunting the many scouts leaping from rooftop to rooftop. "Wonder what I could possibly be worried about?"

"We've made it out of worse situations than this," you reminded him. "You always do this, you know. You have a tendency to let your imagination run wild and assume the worst possible scenarios."

"I like to be prepared for the worst." He pulled you behind a chimney with him to avoid being seen by a passing Titan. Once the Titan had stumbled out of range, he crossed his arms over his chest and sighed. "Sue me for caring, I guess," he muttered under his breath.

You couldn't help but chuckle. "I appreciate that you care." You held onto the soft moment while you had the chance—these days, they were rare. "I want you to worry about yourself though. If you got injured, or god-forbid killed, because you were worrying about me and not yourself, I'd never be able to forgive myself."

Jean's harsh gaze softened. "That's not-"

"Is that what you want? You want me to live as a guilt-stricken widow?"

"Okay, first of all," Jean rolled his eyes, "you've always told me that if I die, it'll be because of my own stupidity, so don't go acting like you think otherwise now. Secondly, we're not married so you wouldn't be a widow."

"Oh, so now you're gonna die and revoke my widow status."

Jean groaned. "How about I just don't die at all?"

You smiled. "I think that's a good plan."

"Armin!" You both gasped at the same time.

Before either one of you had the chance to draw out the sappy-yet-lighthearted moment any longer, a scream rang out in the distance. The both of you shared a look when you recognized the voice. Only one person was capable of emitting such a shrill cry for help.

Jumping out from behind the relative safety of the chimney, you surveyed the terrain in the direction of the scream. A few smaller Titans who were just barely taller than the surrounding buildings were ambling about, swiping at the air in a desperate attempt to swat the soaring scouts out of the air.

Without even checking to see if Jean was behind you or not—you just assumed he was based on experience fighting together—you fired your ODM tethers into the nearest building and took off toward your distressed friend.

"Don't worry. I'll handle it." Jean flashed a smirk before looping his hands under the girl and lifting her into his arms. He tried to play off the way he stepped back ever-so-slightly to counteract being thrown off balance but both you and Armin noticed.

When you arrived to the scene, you spotted Armin in a narrow alley slashing his blade back and forth at the Titan hand reaching for him. Behind Armin, the unconscious body of a fellow scout—a girl you didn't quite recognize—laid in the shadows. Thankfully for them, the alley was just narrow enough that the only part of the Titan able to fit was its arm; and it's arm wasn't quite long enough to reach.

Dropping down into the alley, you and Jean quickly assessed the situation. "Thank goodness you're here." Armin breathed a sigh of relief and knelt down beside the girl. "I found her unconscious in the street. I was able to drag her in here but I'm too weak to lift her out of here on my own."

"If you try to use your ODM gear with her in your arms you'll both be splatting into the nearest window like a bug," you told him matter-of-factly. "I'll distract the Titan, you and Armin get her out of here on foot."

"That's probably the best-" Armin wasn't able to finish his thought before Jean interjected.

"Are you crazy?" Jean furrowed his brows. "You're starting to sound like Eren and we don't need two suicidal maniacs in the 104th."

Hands on your hips, you eyed him. "You're worrying again, dear Jean. Unless you have a better plan than this is what we're doing."

"Well if you'd give me a minute I'm sure I could come up with something better."

"Not to rush you guys or anything, but I don't think she has a minute." Armin looked down at the unconscious girl and pointed out the blood that was now visibly seeping through her shirt. "She's losing a lot of blood."

"It would be safer if you skipped the killing part and just looped back around after we were safe," Jean said.

Turning your back on the others, you stepped toward the Titan hand just close enough that its large fingers grasped at the air less than a meter in front of your body. "Then it's settled. My plan it is." You scoped out the area the best you could from your position. "I'll go up to the roof and lure the Titan to the right. If I remember the formations correctly, you guys should be able to meet up with Levi's squad if you turn left. From there, you guys can get this girl help and I can loop back around after I've killed this big guy."

"And leave him to devour someone else? No thanks."

One day you would die and it would be a real shame if you hadn't taken every opportunity to truly live beforehand.

Jean opened his mouth to protest some more but by the time the thought had reached the tip of his tongue, you were already on the roof. You forced a quick smile down at the two boys before stepping to the edge of the shingles. You weren't stupid—you knew this plan was risky and dangerous, but that was what you had signed up for when you made the tough decision to join the cadets and then the scouts. As far as you were concerned, the definition of living was the continued decision to keep going in the face of a world full of risky and dangerous decisions.

Gripping the handle of your ODM blade hard, you began to bang it against the edge of the shingles at your feet. "Hey, big guy!" You shouted to direct the Titan's attention to yourself. "Why waste your time with them when I'm so much easier to grab?"

"Game on."

At first, the Titan was much more interested in the three grounded scouts over the single one above it. But then, it seemed to re-assess the situation and conclude that you were right. As soon the Titan's soulless, buggy eyes had locked onto you, you smirked.

As the Titan's hand reached out to grab you, you jumped out of the way at the last second. With the Titan fully committed to the chase now, you took off toward the right.

Jumping from building to building, you had to be careful not to stumble with the unsteady footing beneath you; the shingles on the rooves were old and slightly loose, and every time the Titan's hand slammed into the roof behind you in attempt to capture its prey, you had to re-steady yourself.

Glancing back over your shoulder for a brief moment, you were pleased to see that Jean and Armin had almost carried the girl all the way to the end of the street in the opposite direction. With a triumphant smile on your face and the belief that the plan was going to be a success, you began mapping out the area and deciding how best to maneuver killing this Titan when the time came. Your plan, however, was a foolish one plagued by one major rookie mistake; you had forgotten to account for the fact that there was never just one Titan to deal with.

As you fired your ODM tethers into a building across the street, you failed to survey the ground below you before stepping off the ledge. One second, you were gliding easily through the air and the next, a smaller Titan had leapt up from the street, mouth snapping shut. There was a blinding pain in your right leg and when your instincts kicked in, you shot yourself away from the Titan.

Without the capacity to plan any further ahead than getting out of immediate danger, you soon found yourself smacking against the cobblestone street hard due to not tethering yourself to another building in your attempt to escape.

What you felt was the paralyzing inability to save yourself.

You cried out as your body skidded against the ground a meter or so before slowing to a stop. Your vision was blurry from hitting your head a couple of times but when you looked down to assess the damage, you felt your blood run cold at the absence of your right foot.

A puddle of bright red blood was quickly pooling from your fresh stump and all ability to think critically had gone out the window. Shock had frozen you in place so much so that you didn't even notice the Titan approaching you or Jean screaming your name until it was too late. You knew you should get up and try your hardest to get out of there; that no matter how futile the attempt, you had to at least try. But right then, what you knew and what you felt were two vastly different things.

Jean, who was about to watch you die.

Eyes slowly travelling up to the Titan looming over you, you suddenly wished you had listened to Jean. Jean, who only ever looked out for your best interest because he truly cared about you. Jean, who put on an act in front of everyone else but let his true personality shine when it was just the two of you. Jean, who was standing at the other end of the street, screaming your name over and over again while Armin held him back from throwing away his life to save yours.

You didn't fight it when the Titan squeezed its fingers around your torso and lifted you from the ground. Accepting your fate, you closed your eyes and tried to focus on not screaming. Your last thought—the one interrupted by the sudden, all-consuming agony of dying—was that you hoped Jean wouldn't life the rest of his life as a guilt-stricken widower.

As the fear slowly started to wash away, replaced by an unnerving sense of calm, you averted your gaze from the Titan and instead decided to spend your last moment alive staring into the brown eyes of the horse-faced boy you fell in love with. You couldn't muster the strength to say anything—you weren't able to decide what you wanted your last words to be even if you could—so instead you raised your right fist over your heart in a salute and smiled.

━━━━━

Your consciousness felt familiar and yet different. You were still you, there was no denying that, but you were also someone else; something else.

Awareness assaulted your senses in an almost cruel fashion. After embracing the comforting finality of death, a sudden return to the land of the living was brutal. You wondered if this was why babies cried right after being born. Then you wondered why you were able to wonder anything at all.

There was no pain, but if you were alive again—or at the very least, not quite dead yet—you should have been overcome with pain.

Standing at full height, you towered above the buildings around you. Your legs were weak and exhaustion gnawed away at your limbs but compared to everything else, the concern of being tired was tucked deep into the back of your mind. Looking down at yourself, you felt confused but not necessarily startled by the sight of patches of pure muscle where skin should have been. Piecing together all the information you had gathered, you were drawn to only one conclusion.

When you finally decided to open your eyes and face whatever reality was waiting for you, you were greeted with a perspective you were not accustomed to. The world around you was smaller than you remembered, and when you placed your hands underneath yourself to stand up, they were larger than you knew they should be. You were larger than you should be.

You were a Titan-shifter.

First suicidal maniac tendencies and now this; Jean was right, you were more like Eren than you thought.

Jean.

Looking over to where Jean and Armin had been when you last saw them, you were slightly surprised to see them still standing there. You didn't know how much time had passed between your technical death and now, but the horrified looks on their faces hadn't changed at all. You knew they knew what had happened to you after experiencing the same phenomenon with Eren but their shock and terror made it seem like this was the first time they had ever seen a human turn into a Titan.

Then again, you supposed the shock and terror could have come from watching you die and then immediately watching you turn into a monster. That was something that would take some getting used to no matter the circumstances.

You wished you could speak to Jean, assure him that you were okay, but like Eren's Titan you were non-verbal. You opened your mouth and the only thing that emerged was a soft, defeated growl.

Despite that, Jean's eyes softened the way they only did when he was looking at you. Then his gaze shifted and the terror returned. When you followed his eye line, you spotted the same smaller Titan that had bitten your foot off running down the street toward Jean, Armin, and the still unconscious girl.

As the Titan darted past you, completely ignoring you in favour of the easy human targets, a new kind of instinct took over. Without even thinking about it—the only thought being protecting the people you cared about—you kicked the smaller Titan hard, sending it flying into the side of a nearby building. When the Titan still showed signs of life, you reached down and grabbed its head with your much larger hand. Letting out a blood-curdling screech, you called upon every last ounce of strength you had left and bit into the nape of its neck. Once you were sure it was dead, you tore the the Titan's head from its body and dropped the remains to your feet.

Looking back over at Armin and Jean to confirm their safety, your knees buckled beneath you. Drained of energy, the last thing you saw before your Titan body slumped forward was Jean rushing toward you.

"Before you accuse me of worrying too much, might I remind you that I literally just watched you die." Jean's voice was urgent yet gentle in your ear.

When your human body emerged from the nape of your Titan form's neck, your lungs reacted as if you had just resurfaced after being underwater and you drew in a deep, gasping breath. Hot steam billowed around you and as your spent body began to flop over. Before you fell, two strong arms wrapped around you from behind.

"Oh, Jean." You let yourself relax into his embrace. "I'm so sorry."

Jean hugged you tight and buried his face in the crook of your neck. "Don't apologize. Don't you ever apologize for coming back to me."

#lostinthewiind #fanfiction #aot #attack on titan #reader insert #jean kirstein #jean #request #angst #titan #suicidal maniac #jean x reader #jean kirschtein x reader

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tothepointofinsanity · 9 months

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About the KyoSaya stuff. I adore character dynamics that bring out each character's ideology by juxtaposition. I adore it even more when the characters rely on each other for balance to be achieved, both thematically in the story and personally for the characters. I think the balance that can be achieved between Kyoko and Sayaka in a "best case scenario" is beautiful, and very good for both of them. Sayaka can reignite Kyoko's passion for believing in good, and force her to care about other people again, getting her out of her entirely self-oriented existence. And Kyoko can help Sayaka take care of herself and learn to be okay with doing things for herself, get her out of her entirely other people oriented existence. Together they could achieve a life of balance, keeping each other in check and being there for each other. A life where it is okay to be naive and want to help others and it is also okay to be selfish and do things for your own sake. Those ideas can exist together, i think. Sayaka in Rebellion seems to have taken Kyoko's ideas more into account. She doesn't hate herself anymore. I love Kyoko because she is able to exist without exterior validation. She lives for herself, and in that way she never has any regrets. However, Sayaka shows her she can't stay totally indifferent. Ideally, they would be able to live together with Sayaka accepting her own nature without hating herself, and Kyoko accepting her own softer side and not rejecting it. I don't know if you know anything about the game Madoka Portable (came out way before Magia Record), but there are some "routes" in that game where Kyoko and Sayaka manage to become close without Sayaka witching out. To me, Madoka Portable is some of the best extra content there is for Madoka Magica. There are tons of great character moments and KyoSaya absolutely rules in it. There's a quote Kyoko says in the game (unless i made it up, which is possible lmao). it's roughly her saying to Sayaka "Let's live the rest of our selfish lives together!". and that has got to be one of my favorite quotes from anything (even if i did make it up. i don't think i did?). God, relationships where you just want the characters to give in to each other, and figure out the rest together. I'm sorry this is SO ranty and all over the place.

The core ideal of KyoSaya being the yin and yang of each other is often highlighted, which I also enjoy.

I would like to think that these two are special to each other as a result — previously, Sayaka had never been actively (or in Kyoko's case, aggressively) opposed to before in her ideology of self-sacrifice as heroism, while Kyoko had never met a more persistent believer in goodness since her own experiences with her family and the church. Something akin to an unmovable object versus an unstoppable force, except both of them play both roles.

They enable each other and it's true that people with strong personalities often clash together as a result of their conflicted views. But it's where the angst and essence of KyoSaya comes in: they have to learn to not only compromise their values, but to also embrace each other to be at peace with the more extreme parts of said beliefs. Coexistence, yes. The scene where Oktavia makes her second appearance, there is a brief moment where red (Kyoko) mixes in with a crying figure of Sayaka to comfort her, before the mixture spills onto the ground, signifying both of their ends were made in this fusion and peace making.

Ah, I heard of the game before, since a while back I wanted to see if there was anywhere I could still play it on. I didn't look too in-depth into it, so I'm pleasantly surprised that KyoSaya would be hinted in it too. "Let's be selfish together!" is...so....one of my favourite embodiments of any couple dynamic ever o_o It makes sense since Sayaka was afraid of being seen as selfish for wanting someone to understand her and her frustrations, which Kyoko does. And Kyoko wants Sayaka, out of all people, to be with her because Sayaka made Kyoko learn to genuinely care and trust someone again. With Kyoko's trust, Sayaka could be less harsh on herself as a result!! The description that they have to give into each other and figure the rest together in a confusing and unforgiving world is quite literally the Most Thing ever.

It's devotion, ultimately. They are devoted to each other. Thank you for the ask, and no worries about it being a rant. This blog is for all Sayaka and Sayaka-related pairings enjoyers alike. ^^

#kyosaya #when the doomed yuri has deep lore #i appreciate the effort dedicated to this ship so much #being sayaka and kyoko is suffering and peaceful #whereby peace is achieved only after embracing each other #ueueuueue creature #ASKS 💌

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dirty-bosmer · 2 months

Text

20 questions for writers

Thanks to @thequeenofthewinter for the tag <3

Tagging: @elavoria @atypicalacademic @gilgamish @nuwanders @ladytanithia @sheirukitriesfandom @throughtrialbyfire @lucien-lachance @miraakulous-cloud-district @bostoniangirl21 @terendelev

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

704,291 😅

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The Elder Scrolls and probably only ever the elder scrolls. Mostly Oblivion but I have one Skyrim lonngfic in the works. I read fic in several other fandoms, but this one has me by the throat.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Well, I only have 6 in the first place so it's not saying all that much.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I do the best I can to! Sometimes one slips by me on a particularly busy week, and then I'm too mortified by the lapse of time to answer. I don't think it's happened too often, but please know I read them all and am always grateful for them ❤️

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Haven't finished either of them yet, but it's gotta be The Illusionist Part 2, which is an Oblivion novelization with emphasis on the Dark Brotherhood and Mages Guild, or Beyond the Break, which is just me crying about Mathieu Bellamont.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Treacle which is still hella angst lmao, but Scar-Tail does live happily ever after, and it's all thanks to @atypicalacademic for the inspiration ❤️❤️❤️ I have also vowed to make my Skyrim fic, Slither and Writhe happier 😤 Thus far, it's going... well, it is going.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't, and the few dissenting opinions that I have received I wouldn't consider hate either. They're just opinions. I hesitated to mention this, but since I was LITCHRALLY talking about Lucien Lachance on one of Ray's posts a few minutes ago, in the past I have receive messages detailing how my interpretation of Lucien is distasteful, given he is unabashedly a villain in my story and 1/2 of a toxic relationship (also he's... kind of pathetic lol). It's a darkfic and not for everyone, I'm well aware. Fortunately, many of my very lovely, talented friends and mutuals write great Lucien fics that are different from mine, so at the end of the day we all get what we want :D Variety is the spice of life, and you can pry grossnasty Lucien out of my cold, dead fingies.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I write sexual content (idk what counts as smut). Originally, I wrote all the sex scenes as fade-to-black, and while they're not super graphic, while editing a few months ago I thought "you know what, this needs more cunt." So yeah. The sex scenes have become a bit more explicit now than they were in the first iteration.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nah, and I don't think I ever will.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, and unless people are out there lifting passages of my writing and inserting it into their fics, I'm not going to claim ownership over ideas. We're all playing in the same sandpit, and while the execution is my own, I find it quite difficult to say the stories are totally original or novel because all my writing, from concepts to style, have been influenced in some way by the works of others.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

No, but I've tossed around some ideas with @zomboidatomic that may or may not one day bear fruit...

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I've worked them all out of my system at this point, tbh. Romance doesn't really do anything for me on its own without compelling characterizations and intriguing plot. I select by other tags over ship most of the time too. That said I've been driven crazy by some of my friends ships with characters I've never even spoken to before. If it's good it's good, you know. (Though I am currently re-watching Hannibal and I will confess that I am still ill about Hannigram ajkfhalg)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I'm going to finish them all, dammit!

16. What are your writing strengths?

Characterization, I think, especially when writing people who are awful lmao I've received a lot of compliments when it comes to writing villains and morally grey characters.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Ugh, I am so self-indulgent. Sometime last year I edited The Illusionist part 2 and trimmed out 60k words. It was so BLOATED (probablly still is). I think there were times when the plot got sidelined because I had an idea for a fun scene. Yes, I love writing Lucien and Nim hate-fucking and tearing each other apart in some weird mashup of Tommy Wiseau in The Room and the alien in The Thing. No, I did not need three chapters of this back to back, but I wanted it...

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

If the plot calls for it, then by all means 👍

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Hmm, now that I think of it it may have been a Fallout 3 Harkness fic that I kept in a composition notebook when I was 12. It will never see the light of day, obivo.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

OoOoh, that's tough. Slither and Writhe already feels stronger to me because I'm a more experienced writer, and I actually planned it out, but The Illusionist is my first baby.

#tag games

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kim-seung-mo · 2 years

Text

𝟚𝟜 ℍ𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕤 𝔸𝕗𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕙 (𝕃𝕖𝕖 𝔽𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕩)

♩ gn!reader, ANGST, mention of cancer/terminal disease (not specific), death, tears and crying, don't read if you're not comfortable

♩♩ word count: 4.2k (omg I'm so sorry)

♩♩♩ A/N: I have no words... I'm sorry

Chan and Minho, Changbin and Hyunjin, Jisung

11:59 PM.

"Can you sing that song for me…one last time?"

You asked, despite the fact that your eyelids were so heavy they could barely stay open, despite feeling like all the strength in your body had been drained from you, you managed to ask.

Felix had been crying until he couldn't breathe, feeling nothing but despair.

But when he heard your words, he still nodded vigorously.

He knew this was perhaps the last time you would hear the song.

"You are my sunshine…"

"My only sunshine……"

Felix's tears dripped down your face.

You paused for a moment and raised your eyes to see the heartbreaking look on his face.

If it were any other day, you would lift your finger to wipe away his tears and tell him not to cry.

But you simply didn't have the strength now.

Just keeping your eyes open took all your strength.

"You make me happy, when skies are grey…"

"You'll never know, dear…how much I love you……"

Your own eyes grew watery as tears flowed down from the corners of your eyes.

His voice was still as beautiful as the first time you heard it.

It has the power to make you experience the magic of falling in love all over again.

However, at this moment, the lyrics of the song did not make you feel as happy as it once did.

You only felt endless sadness and fear.

You knew you would never hear him sing again, never see his smile again.

Just the thought of this made you reluctant to face the fact that you were leaving.

Felix held your hand tightly, trying hard to pass on the warmth from his own body to yours.

But no matter how hard he tried, your body heat drained away little by little.

"Please don't take..."

"......"

But before he could finish the last line of the song, the monitor interrupted with a piercing sound.

A symbol of your life coming to an end.

Felix lowered his head and left one last kiss on your forehead.

"Please don't take my sunshine away..."

Still he braced himself to sing the last line of your favorite song.

Did you hear it?

Y/N, the love of my life, did you hear me?

If you did, open your eyes and look at me...

......

............

..................

Y/N?

12:01 AM.

He wouldn't let go of your body, wouldn't leave the room.

As if you wouldn't leave if he stayed by your side.

Not only the doctors, but also his members came to persuade him.

They all knew that today would be your last.

There would be no more "Y/N" in this world after today.

It was as if the world had accepted your death and that you would one day leave them from long ago.

Felix thought he had accepted it a long time ago.

But when it really came down to it, he realized - he simply wasn't ready.

Neither the fact that you left, nor the days after without you.

He wasn't ready for either.

12:30 AM.

You met three years ago, when Felix visited the hospital to receive treatment for his back injury.

It was a beautiful day, but Felix was not in a good mood.

He didn't get to perform on stage with his members, which was the worst thing that could have happened to him.

After getting his medicine, Felix was about to leave, but just as he was passing the courtyard, a voice came from afar.

"You are my sunshine…. my only sunshine."

It was a voice that instantly caught Felix's attention.

He was not a person who liked to crowd, but his steps were halted.

He suddenly wondered who the owner of the voice was.

It was there, in the hospital courtyard, on a breezy day, when he first met you.

You were sitting on a bench in the courtyard, surrounded by a group of children, singing that song with them.

Your smile and voice, the gentle way you looked at the children, the laughter of those children, the heartwarming scene.

Everything about it made his heart pound.

By the time he came back to his senses, he had joined you.

Singing the song together with you.

"You make me happy, when skies are grey…"

Just like the lyrics sang, your song cleared up his otherwise gloomy mood.

"You have a nice voice."

You said to him after the song was over.

You spoke in the same soft tone.

"You… you do too……"

He didn't know what to say, and for a moment it was as if the whole world was just left with the two of you.

"What's your name?" You asked.

You didn't know about Stray Kids, which relieved him slightly.

"Felix, Lee Felix."

Your smile brightened a bit more.

"I'm Y/N."

1:00 AM.

Felix went quiet once he got out of the hospital.

All the way from the hospital to the parking lot, he stared at the sights and memories of everything that had happened between the two of you.

The patient room, the courtyard, the pathway, the interlocked fingers, the nervous trembling, your smile as always, your song, everything…everything between the two of you ……

"It's like a long��long …… long dream. A beautiful yet sad dream, full of the sweetness of love and the pain of parting ……"

Now that the dream was over, it was time for him to face reality.

Everything in the hospital, about you was to be left behind.

Tears quietly slipped from the corners of his eyes again.

He wondered if he would ever wake up again.

2:30 AM.

Back in the dormitory, Felix laid down on the cold bed.

The members were concerned about him, but he wished to be by himself for a while.

You didn't have an apartment together, you never spent any time together outside of the hospital.

You weren't even properly regarded as his lover.

It was as if you were merely a passing visitor to his life, stopping by just for a brief moment.

He didn't even know where your home was.

Come to think, he didn't know anything about you.

Three years, and he only knew the most superficial things.

Maybe you were deliberately hiding them from him, just like you were hiding your illness from him.

Because you didn't want him to have too much connection with you, too much involvement.

But in the end, it turned out the way it did.

And who could be blamed?

When two people fall in love, nothing can ever stop them.

3:00 AM.

In his dream, he saw both you and him from three years ago.

The second time you met after your first encounter.

It was a week after, and he was visiting the hospital again to get his medication replaced.

He originally thought that meeting you was just a coincidence, something that would only happen once.

But he saw you again, still in the courtyard, this time singing to a group of elderly people.

Meeting him again, you were still smiling at him.

You seemed to recognize him and waved to him at the end of your song.

He didn't care about anything else as he went straight in your direction.

"Y/N… I didn't expect to meet you again ……"

You didn't seem to expect him to come straight in your direction, froze for a moment, but only for a moment.

You didn't exchange more than a few words between you, as he was called away just a few minutes later.

But it was because of this second encounter that he began to look forward to his weekly trips to the hospital.

Then the third, fourth, and fifth time, every week, at the same time, in the same courtyard, you were always there.

Felix watched each passing scene as if he were watching a merry-go-round.

At that time, you were still able to stand on your own.

At that time, you still had the energy to sing.

But at that time, you had no hope for the future ……

Perhaps it was better for you to have no hope.

"Y/N, why are you always in the hospital?"

Three months later, Felix's back had gotten better and he no longer had to come to the hospital every week, but he still rushed to the hospital courtyard at the same time every week just to talk to you.

You looked at him, narrowed your eyes and smiled.

"Because I'm sick."

You said it as if it was something easy.

But that smile did not seem to come from your heart.

Later he learned that you had spent almost your whole life in the hospital.

5:00 AM.

Felix was suddenly awakened by an alarm clock.

Your face faded from his dream.

He blinked and reached for his nightstand.

It was 5:00 AM, time for your medication.

"Y/N… It's time to take your medicine……"

……

Right, you didn't have to take your medicine anymore.

Deleting the alarm, he sat frozen on his bed.

The dorm had fallen completely silent.

There was not a single sound.

He hugged his legs tightly.

He recalled this time yesterday.

At five o'clock in the morning yesterday, he received a notice of your condition.

You had little family and no friends other than the elderly and children in the hospital.

Felix was your emergency notifier.

He knew you weren't going to make it, and he knew your last day was coming soon.

But for some reason, he just kept having a glimmer of hope.

Maybe you could stay with him a little longer.

Maybe he could spend more time with you.

He started crying again.

6:30 AM.

There was nothing crueler for lovers than watching each other die slowly.

After Felix accidentally learned of your illness, every day after that was filled with tears.

He didn't know and couldn't imagine how much pain you must have felt.

Put on a smile and sing for everyone every day, even with all the pain.

Even when you couldn't stand up on your own, you asked Felix to push you in your wheelchair and take you downstairs to the courtyard with him.

You always said you lived a meaningless life.

"God is really cruel, to bring me into this world incomplete without my consent. And now to send me away……"

Whenever Felix heard you say this, his heart ached to the core.

You were always helping others and bringing smiles to their faces.

But then, who was there to save you?

You always told him that he was the angel sent from heaven to save you.

But Felix always has tears in the corners of his eyes.

He believed he couldn't do anything.

He couldn't bring a smile to your face.

Couldn't share your pain.

Couldn't stop your health from deteriorating.

Couldn't stop you from dying.

He wasn't the angel sent from heaven to save you.

He was just an ordinary boy who fell in love with you.

7:45 AM.

A new day began, which was the only relief for Felix.

Minho brought him breakfast and gently stroked his hair, giving him a sense of comfort.

He opened his mouth to say something, but seeing his younger brother like this, he couldn't bring himself to say anything in the end.

He just held his wrist tightly and told him "we are all here for you".

9:00 AM.

Chan came to visit him and brought him his favorite sweets.

Felix looked at Chan, who was like a real brother, saw how Chan didn't sleep well from worrying about him, and threw himself into his arms and cried.

None of the other members knew you, other than your name being Y/N, they knew nothing about you, or the relationship between you and Felix.

Chan just knew that Felix started enjoying his trips to the hospital, and always had a happy smile on his face when he came back.

"Tell me about Y/N."

Felix's head lifted, his eyes still red as he looked at Chan, pupils quivering, hands clenching his shirt.

"I didn't even know at first…that they were so severely ill."

10:00 AM.

You were always smiling, no matter how much it hurt, all the time.

That was something Felix couldn't do in any way.

Especially now.

He always watched you, watched you burn yourself like a match, lighting up others, eventually burning to ashes and leaving the world with nothing left behind.

How could you, who loved to laugh, who was so gentle and kind, suffer from such sickness?

The day he found out about your illness, Felix was planning to confess his love for you.

It was the third month, in autumn.

The leaves in the courtyard began to wither and fall, making crisp, dry sounds when stepped on underfoot.

His back has almost healed up, meaning he wouldn't need to come to the hospital anymore.

But he didn't want to say farewell to you.

He decided to wager everything to confess his love for you.

He knew you were always out and about in the hospital.

He knew you were always wearing a patient's uniform, he knew you were sick.

But he didn't expect it to be such an illness.

He didn't think you would have less than three years left.

11:00 AM.

He didn't want to recall that day.

But now, all memories of you have become his most cherished.

Even that day too.

He remembered blushing as he wrote his phone number on a slip of paper and stood behind the big tree in the courtyard with trembling hands.

He remembered a breeze blowing, and he remembered thinking that now was the perfect time.

He remembered hearing a voice at the moment he was about to step outside.

He remembered what the man said.

"Y/N, as I told you before, you only have three years left in the fullness of time now. Do you want to shorten that already short period of time? What you need now is to recuperate and stop blowing in the cold. Come back to your room with me, it's time for a checkup."

He remembered the sound of his heart stopping.

Remembered that he had never been so painfully distraught.

The paper was clutched in his hands and whisked away like crumbs.

He remembered the next time you saw him and could tell at a glance that something was wrong about him.

"You know, don't you."

He simply couldn't stop the trembling in his legs and couldn't organize any words at all.

"Don't feel bad, Felix. Don't feel bad for me."

"Life is short, but I think I'm doing something meaningful now."

"I don't fear death."

"I'm happy enough."

He knew you were lying.

For the first time, he realized that your smile too had a fake side.

11:30 AM.

"They sound like a very strong person."

Chan was too shocked to even attempt to comfort Felix, who had been through such terrible times.

Felix shook his head fiercely.

"No, Chan hyung, Y/N is not a strong person."

You were just an ordinary person, you can get scared, you can get nervous, you can get overwhelmed, you can get sad, you cry, you fear death, you don't want to leave this world, you don't want to make your beloved ones hurt and sad but you can't do anything about it, you feel helpless, you cry secretly where no one knows, you want to show your best side to others, hiding the side you don't, the vulnerable side, you……

You were just an ordinary human being.

12:30 PM.

Felix received a call from the hospital that your funeral was coming up.

Usually funerals took more time to prepare, but since you knew you were going to die, everything was already prepared.

Felix has been afraid to get involved in those things, he didn't want to face the fact that you would leave him in the near future.

And when the day came, he was still afraid to face it.

"We'll be there for you, don't be afraid."

All eight hugged together, providing Felix with the reassurance and courage he needed most.

The courage to attend your funeral.

1:00 PM.

There were not many people at your funeral. Besides the eight of them, there were only the people you used to sing for and a few doctors you knew.

Your parents didn't come.

Felix just stood there, not knowing what to do.

He stared at the tombstone not far away, and your picture on it.

Just when he felt his legs losing their strength to hold him up, he suddenly felt something grab him by the leg of his pants.

He looked down and saw a familiar face.

It was a child who was often seen around you.

A little boy with leukemia.

"When is Y/N going to wake up?"

He asked in an innocent voice.

Felix's tears instantly started to flow again. He didn't know how to answer the boy, didn't know how to tell him that his favorite Y/N would never wake up again.

1:30 PM.

The children gathered together, took his hand and stood in front of your tombstone.

They muttered something between them, then the leader of the group looked up into Felix's misty eyes.

"Hyung, let's sing for Y/N together!"

"If we sing together, maybe Y/N will wake up and sing with us!"

"Hyung, Y/N said their favorite person is you! If you sing along, they will definitely wake up!"

"Yes, yes, Y/N also told me that they like Felix the most!"

"Felix hyung, why are you crying?"

1:55 PM.

"You're Y/N's boyfriend, right?"

A paramedic called out to Felix as he was about to leave with the members.

He turned back and was about to shake his head in denial, but suddenly a thought surfaced.

This might be the only time he could ever call himself your boyfriend.

So, he nodded.

"That's great."

The paramedic smiled reassuringly.

"Y/N said to give these to their boyfriend, but when I asked around, everyone told me Y/N didn't have a boyfriend… I thought this was just another Y/N joke."

Felix's eyes widened.

Then with trembling hands, he took them.

Wrapped on the outside was one of his shirts, one that he had lent you because you said it smelled like him.

Now, no longer did it smell like him.

What remained on it was the smell of the pungent sanitizer from the hospital room.

And, lightly, the smell of you.

"Thanks…… I'll, I'll keep it safe……"

2:30 PM.

It wasn't really that heavy of a package, but Felix felt like it weighed a thousand pounds.

When he returned to the dorm, he sat back on his bed weakly, then carefully opened the clothes.

Inside, there was the candy you love, a nachimbong that Felix gave you, and a camera.

Upon closer inspection, it was a video camera.

His heart skipped a beat.

He knew this camera.

Since some unknown time, every time he came to visit you in the hospital, there was this camera by your bedside.

But every time he asked what you had filmed and said he wanted to see what was in it, you refused.

"It's not time yet."

Were the words you would say every time.

Now he knew what that meant.

"What year is it again… I forget, but it's a beautiful day."

"This is the first video I'm going to record for you, can you hear me?"

"Hmmm… I didn't know what to say though I said it was going to be a video for you."

"Originally, I wanted to record my mood every day, and then in passing, tell you what I wanted to say to you but didn't dare to in front of you…… But, won't that be boring?"

"Forget it, I'll just go with my heart."

"Once again, Felix, hello, by the time you see this video, I should have…"

"Looks like I'm really not cut out for this kind of thing …… How do you guys manage to talk comfortably in front of cameras, huh?"

"Well …… I'll just pretend like, right now, I'm talking to you."

"Felix… Today you asked me if I was afraid of death, and I told you no."

"That was actually a lie. I am so scared."

"I'm afraid that one day after I fall asleep, I'll never wake up again."

"Leaving this world alone, without any trace, as if I had never been here at all."

"Before I met you, I was not afraid. I really wasn't afraid."

"Because there was never any hope, there was no fear of loss."

"But, since I met you… For the first time, I wanted to live."

"I wanted to see the sun every day, to share myself with you like this… I wanted… I want to heal, to be a normal person, to love you like a normal person."

"But I can't tell you, I can't look you in the eye and say these foolish words."

"I could only tell you that I wasn't afraid, that I was relieved of the world and had no more attachment…"

"I'm sorry….Felix, for not telling you the truth……"

"I'm sorry……"

"Today is the twentieth day of recording, and I don't seem to be nervous anymore, is this how you guys came little by little too?"

"When we were singing today, I realized for the first time that the lyrics of the song were actually saddening."

"When you were singing the song to me, it was like I saw for the first time in your eyes feelings that were not happy."

"I've recently started having a bit of trouble standing up, and just walking a few

exhausts my whole body… Am I about to die?"

"If you were by my side right now, you'd probably tell me not to say things like that again, right?"

"But, whether we want to admit it or not, we're still getting closer to the end."

"I don't know if letting you accept this in advance will make it possible for you to have fewer tears at the end…"

"But no matter what I do, I always feel like I'm being selfish……"

"How can someone like me, who doesn't know when I'll never wake up again, occupy you?"

"…… But you have many, many more lives after me."

"And I will perhaps have only you in this life."

"So, it shouldn't be too bad to let me be a little selfish, right?"

"I just want to… In the last few days…… Be able to experience the feelings of a normal person……"

"…… But, do you even love me? Do you really love me, or do you pity me? Are you only staying by my side because you pity me?"

"Today is the 60th day of recording! It's your birthday…"

"Happy birthday…… I hope that this is not the last birthday I will spend with you."

"Today is the eighty-eighth day of recording ……"

"Felix… Do you think, I am still able to see the arrival of next spring?"

"Today is, the hundredth day of recording."

"I never thought I could actually reach this number…… It's a miracle, right?"

"Today, I pretended I was asleep……"

"Or maybe, it's because, I simply couldn't lift my eyelids anymore?"

"I heard you say to me that you love me……"

"Do you know how much strength it took for me not to cry out?"

"I love you back, I love you so much."

"I don't want to die……"

"I love you……."

"One hundred and third day."

"One hundred and twentieth day."

"One hundred and thirtieth day."

"One hundred and thirty-eighth day."

"……"

"Today is the one hundred and thirty-ninth day of recording."

"This sounds weird, but…… It's like I, like, know that today is the last day."

"I still have, so, so many, so many things I want to say to you……"

"I may not ever, ever get the chance to say them again."

"I thought my body wouldn't hurt anymore……"

"But, every time I think that I will leave you soon……"

"My heart, it still hurts to an unbearable degree."

"If you can, before I go……"

"I'd like, just one last time, to hear you sing our song again."

"But I may, after I fall asleep tonight, never wake up."

"Felix……"

" I haven't even left yet, but I'm already missing you."

12:00 AM.

Nearly nine hours of video, and yet Felix watched it all in one sitting.

He thought his tears had dried up long ago.

But when he watched you say things like "I don't want to die", "I love you" and "it hurts" in the video, he could only feel his heart being torn apart.

He wanted to reach out and touch your cheek, wanted to embrace the you in the video and tell you how much he loves you.

How much he wanted to sing your song again.

Why couldn't he be smarter? Why couldn't he see through your mind…

Why couldn't he stop you from thinking like that? Why couldn't he make you happy?

Why couldn't he do anything……

He just wanted to love you like a normal person……

Why couldn't he even do that……

Why did he feel like his heart just died with you?

#stray kids #skz #skz imagines #stray kids imagines #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz reactions #stray kids reactions #skz headcanons #stray kids headcanons #skz scenarios #stray kids scenarios #skz angst #stray kids angst #felix #felix angst #felix x reader #felix imagines

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macawritesupdates · 11 days

Note

Reading mol is so painful but good I was so anxious to start the chapter that I put it off a bit cuz boy does that one hit hard. I was not disappointed oh man I loved the talk Yuuji and Choso had so much he's such a good big bro. I think that loving someone and understanding that you can't accept their behavior is so hard but vital. I knew the storm was going to be bad. To be fair that wasn't a hard predict this is the fic where you punch us in the chest over and over and we all still keep coming back for more so of course it was going to be painful. Still damn it why. If it weren't for the storm maybe this wouldn't be an angst fic at all Yuuji would have sailed home safe Sukuna would have welcomed him and they would have been perfectly happy forever. God Sukuna hurt my heart this chapter waiting for his love to come home as he realized that his life is empty when he's alone. Fuck that storm man we could have had it all, reconciliation, Yuuji introducing Sukuna to his found family, probably make up sex, and maybe even Choso meeting a certain hot prince and starting another harem leading to Sukuna getting to live as a noble without bloodshed (--> delusional), but noooo everything had to go wrong. God damn it he's decided to close his heart to love forever how's he going to react when he finds out Yuuji is alive? Listen I need the puppy to use his sniffer dog nose and track Yuuji down he can do it he can reunite his humans (---> still delusional). It was very good but please forgive me I don't think I'll be rereading this chapter, I'm going to go back and reread the scene where baby Sukuna shows Yuuji his extra eyes arms and mouth expecting him to react with horror only for Yuuji to give him some candy and a hug and his friendship instead. Just that bit. Nothing else. Those two babies are fine OK and if I go back to that chapter and refuse to read on they'll stay that way, right? Yeah that conviction will last until you post another chapter. Thank you for writing and sharing I think you're very talented even if you do sometimes use your writing gifts for evil and make me want to cry.

MoL is a lot of "what-ifs" on when something happens and just how things can't be controlled ; w ; like there were so many times things could have gone differently for these two, but inevitably their own actions are driving this story to its conclusion ; w ; In this case, both of them are going to be pulled in different ways as new faces are coming into the story and things are getting twisty moving forward.... I'm so excited to share the next few chapters as the ideas for them have been living in my head for MONTHS!

...but if need break from angst, I do got some silly fluffy fics to read and pretend MoL can't hurt us ; w ;

#Maca answers asks #MoL is the fic that I warn is the super angst fic #it is for crying and then reading fluff after ; w ;

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lily-janus · 1 year

Text

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Summary: Roman goes to talk to Logan after the fight... but words might not be enough this time...

Pairing: platonic logince

Warnings: self depricating talk, feeling overlooked, crying, yelling, ANGST. Lwmme know if I missed anything.

Word count: 1,265

For @loginceweek2023 day 2- poetry comfort (used the swap card)

This is the aftermath of a one shot I wrote for last year's week: Everything Ends In Faliure. The beginning can be a bit confusing if you haven't read the previous one but the rest can stand on its own I think if you don't want to read it.

Enjoy!

--------------------

"If you ever need to talk-" Roman starts, but Logan shuts the door in his face before he can finish.

Roman frowns in confusion, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, suddenly realizing his creations were watching the entire scene. With a quick wave he puts them back in their houses and makes the beast disappear.

What was that all about… since when is Logan running around looking for something to fight? And without a weapon too? That's oddly irrational of him… something's up…

He should probably go talk to him.

He takes a deep breath, opens the door and walks outside.

As he walks to Logan's room, the events of a few minutes ago keep replaying in his mind.

"I said I'm fine okay?!"

"I thought you were supposed to be the smart one!"

He just can't shake away that look on Logan's face after he saved him… he never saw Logan like that. He almost looked… broken, hopeless… maybe even angry.

Roman swallows nervously, whatever it is that's eating at Logan, he's going to do his best to help him.

He knocks on Logan's door, and waits.

"Go away."

Roman frowns, Logan never answers his door like that, he usually even leaves it open in case someone needs his help.

"It's everyone's favorite prince!" He tries in his cheerful tone.

"What do you want?" Logan says from the other side of the door.

"Why, you to help me with my homework of course, Teach!" Roman chuckles, hoping it'll lighten the tension a bit.

He can practically hear Logan rolling his eyes. "Roman…"

Roman sighs. "I'm just worried about you, Specs, can I come in?"

The door opens a fraction to reveal Logan's annoyed face. "As I already told you, I'm fine, you can stop pretending you care now and go back to slaying your impossible beasts." He moves to shut the door again but Roman puts his hand on it to stop it from closing.

"Nice try but you're not getting rid of me that easily." He opens the door wider and strouds past Logan and into his room. "In fact, I'm not leaving until you tell me what's bothering you. So either you tell me, or say hello to your new roommate!" He sits on his bed, folding his arms over his chest in a show of stubbornness.

Logan closes the door slowly, sighing heavily and shaking his head. "You are the most stubborn, annoying and frustrating side in this entire mindscape." He pinches the bridge of his nose.

Roman grins. "I know, it's my specialty. Now, what's on your mind Nerdio? Someone giving you a hard time? Too much work? I'm all ears." He pats the space next to him on the bed invitingly.

"There's nothing 'on my mind', Roman, as I already said-"

"I think I'll move my bed right next to yours… oh! And add some glitter to the walls, and red, you definitely need more red in here…" Roman tapped his chin in mock consideration.

"Okay, fine! I'll tell you what's wrong!" Logan snapped.

Roman flinched at the unexpected aggressiveness from the otherwise composed side, suddenly regretting provoking him.

"You!" He points at Roman. "You are the problem! All of you, including Thomas! …Or maybe I'm the problem…" Logan deflates a bit. "I don't know but something feels… not good." He turns away from Roman, hugging himself tightly.

"It doesn't make any sense, I know, I've been trying to make sense of it all but… well it's not exactly working." He then chuckles emptily. "Look at me, the logical side who can't make sense of the situation… What a joke." He says bitterly.

Roman frowns in concern. "Logan… just because you're Thomas' logic doesn't mean you have to know everything, you're allowed to be confused, life is confusing."

Logan does the same, weird, empty chuckle again, "if that's so 'allowed'..." he rolls his eyes. "Why do I keep being overlooked? Why do I keep getting outshined by literally everyone else? What's even the point of offering help when it's obvious no one here wants it! What am I doing wrong?!" He slams his fist on his work table, making everything on it shake violently.

"Do I even matter to you? Do I have any value at all? Or am I just here so you can dismiss me and move on?" Logan's voice is small now, even a bit shaky, and it takes Roman a long moment to realize that:

Logan is crying…

For a moment, all was quiet except for Logan's quiet sniffling, Roman not knowing what to say.

"...C-c'mon, Teach, you know how we are, getting all emotional and arguing, it has nothing to do with you. Of course you matter and have value, we're a family remember?" Roman eventually found his words. Logan's back was still turned to him but he could see he was shaking.

Slowly, Roman got up and walked towards him. "There's nothing wrong with you, you hear me? It might feel that way… we might have made you feel that way but… it's not true, we need you, just like you are, and we'll try to listen to you more, you have my word."

Logan suddenly turned to him sharply. "You… need me? …You're not just saying that?" Logan was looking at him with hopeful eyes.

"It's gonna be okay kiddo, we love you."

"....right."

Roman shook the memory away quickly, words aren't going to be enough here… actions speak louder than words. He nodded firmly to Logan. "Yes, we do, I mean it, and I'm gonna prove it to you."

Logan wiped his tears, looking at Roman with confusion. "What does that mean?"

Roman grinned. "You'll see, follow me!" He passed Logan, grabbing his hand and leading them outside and to his room.

He rummaged around, looking for something.

"Roman… what are you doing?" Logan asked, sounding much more like his exasperated self, which Roman chose to take as a good sign.

"I know it's around here somewhere… ah-ha!" He held up the notebook triumphantly.

"A… notebook, I feel needed already." Logan raised a skeptical eyebrow, another good sign.

"The notebook." Roman correct. "This is where I wrote down all of Thomas' biggest dreams! Come on, read it!"

Frowning, Logan took the notebook and flipped through it. "This is all highly delusional and unrealistic." He said after a while.

Roman nodded. "Exactly!" He handed him a different notebook. "Now read this!"

Still looking confused, Logan took the other one and flipped through it as well. "This is where I wrote down Thomas' accomplishments over the years." He explained. "Now, compare the two." He instructed, and Logan did.

He then looked up at Roman. "You see now?" Roman asked him softly. "Thomas would have gotten nowhere without you rationalizing his biggest wishes and dreams into manageable steps, thanks to you, he was able to get where he wanted in life! If he had just listened to my great dreams and fantasies he would have just spent his days daydreaming without accomplishing anything! We need you, Logan… I need you. You help make our visions a reality."

Logan closed the notebooks, holding them close to his chest. "I… never realized…" He looked up at Roman, then suddenly dropped the notebooks and pulled him into a tight hug. "Thank you." He whispered shakily in his ear. "Thank you, thank you, thank you…" he was crying again, but as more of a release of tension than anything else.

Roman was shocked for a moment, but then smiled, hugging the logical side back, "you're welcome, Teach."

#sanders sides #logan sanders #roman sanders #Everything Ends In Failure sequal #loginceweek2023 #platonic logince #loginceweek2023 day 2-poetry #swapped to Comfort #logan angst #happy ending #tw self deprecation #tw shouting #cw crying #hurt comfort #Lily writes

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bonesandthebees · 10 months

Note

I just got around to reading the new chapter, so here’s random reactions I saved in my notes so I wouldn’t forget (two parts)

(Wilbur tried to imagine what Phil would say. How Phil would look at him after he learned what he did.)

Wf flashbacks I might re-read the fight scene again

(“Like, I thought I could read you pretty well even with the blindfold on, but now it’s, like, too easy but not at the same time.”)

It’s because he’s so expressive but has a permanent sad face that masks everything else :((((

(“I mean you kinda look like you’re about to start crying, but you also look like you just took a shot of moontane and you’re trying not to be a pussy about it but you really wanna spit it out.”)

LMFAOOOO

(“If we go to Jack’s room are we gonna find out he’s gone missing in the middle of the night?” Techno tried to joke.)

HELP I love techno, you always capture his one liners so well, and they’re always so hilarious

(Wilbur couldn’t blame him. He didn’t want to look at his own face either right now.)

I don’t even have words for this part but it stood out to me. I feel like Spruce is my new matpat, and whenever I see a line that looks like it could be significant I turn to them to tell me what it is immediately. Thankfully we’re working with religious trauma rather than dead children this time.

(“Because I want to talk to the Pythia alone,” Phil said, carefully watching him as he said his title.)

So no sandduo?? *throws phone* 😾 /j

(His breathing hitched as he cut himself off, the blood roaring louder in his ears. He wrapped his arms around his chest, gasping as he fought for air. - “I just feel so fucking useless,” He murmured, curling in further on himself. - but it has to be me. I’ve failed at my purpose for existing,)

WILB,,,,,

The angst is delicious but at what cost

Reminds me of the only time I ever ate in New Jersey. We went to Olive Garden, I ordered one of my favorite foods, I ate too much, puked it all up, got back to the table and wanted more of it bc it was really good food. Then we left NJ.

(“But that’s what I’m supposed to do,” he whispered. “That’s what I was created for.”)

I- I don’t even know what to say,,, these two sentences fill me with so many emotions

(“I can’t tell you much right now, but it won’t be long before things start moving very quickly.)

Oh???

(know m-” - your name?”)

YOUR NAME?? LIKE STRI-💥💥💥

But also yes wilbur it’s /your/ name 😭😭

(I might not know your name)

Is he gonna,,, do I dare hope

(Phil gave him a small smile. “You’ll tell me when you’re ready, mate.”)

IS HE

Dammit

I do 100% believe that Phil is next on the name reveal list though

Watch me say that and the next person will be someone I didn’t expect at all, like Ponk or Sam or something

(1/2)

- 🪐

hello hello ty for the reactions these are always fun

well it's partly that he looks very sad without the blindfold bc he just has Sad Victorian Child Eyes but also tommy has learned how to read him with half his face covered. now he gets too much information at once compared to what he's used to dealing with, so he's second guessing his own judgement because he doesn't know how wilbur shows emotion through his eyes. does that make sense? idk. I'm tired. I wrote over 3k words today.

lol thank you I have so much fun with techno's one liners. so many fics make him super serious which is such a missed opportunity bc techno cracks jokes all the time in canon!! let him make awkward one liners it's a very important part of his character

LMAO yes ty spruce for pointing out so many important lines

i'm sorry you puked at a NJ olive garden but also the irony there is that the last time I ate an olive garden was also when I was in NJ. I also don't live in NJ.

he'll tell phil when he's ready :)

#ask #saturn anon #glass ch 22 #through a glass divine #vomit mention

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piease-iove-me · 1 year

Note

can u answer all of them????

omg! i wasn't expecting this but happily! thank you!!!

When did you start writing? How?

. mmm i think it was about 2018? around that time i started trying my hand with writing small drabbles for this au on here

2. Has your writing changed over time?

. it has!!! incredibly so! especially lately since i've started writing for the tw fandom. though i still have a long way to go TT

3. Do you read your own fics?

. mmmm depends? i mostly do to see what's going on and if it's making any sense. rarely just for the sake of it

4. Do you write every day? If so, do you have daily goals?

. i have taken a break from writing regularly the past couple months. but before that? especially since i was in this twt fix exchange, i wrote a minimum of 2/3k words per day, 5k on my free days TT i kind of miss those times.

5. Do you plan? Or do you “wing it”?

. winging it gives me incredible amounts of anxiety. so yeah. i totally plan plan plan until i can find no hole anymore. chances are there will be some anyway but at least i can fool myself

6. If you plan, what does your planning process look like?

. mostly i go with an idea, that's often just a scene or short dialogue and then i try see how everyone got to that place. and from there i fill in all the holes that inevitable form. i don't stop planning/start writing until all my own nagging questions are answered. if i end up stuck, i drop the idea :') i'm kind of a perfectionist so... couldn't do otherwise TT

7. How would you describe your writing style?

. oh uh... idk??????

8. Have any comments/tags/responses on a fic of yours ever made you laugh, cry or both?

. mmm laugh yes, quite some, actually. and i'm so thankful for them? funny comments are just such a balm to the soul sometimes

9. Have you ever made yourself laugh with something you’ve written?

. omg yes TT but i can have quite some very dark humor so i'm not gonna expose myself and say what did the trick TT

10. How many unfinished works are in your drafts?

oh good god. i know for sure it must be about 30, afraid to check the actual number though TT and that would be without counting the scribbled away ideas i have collected in my notes (20 last i checked) and docs TT

11. Do you write for yourself, or for the readers?

. thankfully, i started to mostly write for myself. or rather, i write what i want and hope people will like it, but either way i know my story won't be molded by others' likings and wants. so that's a good enough compromise/achievement imo

12. Do you feel pressured to write some days?

. i used to. especially when writing for my previous fandom cause of all the pressure to update. but now? here? not really, it'a all so chill and nice i can take it slow

13. Multichapter fics or one shots?

. admitting most of my works start as one shots, i can't do one shots. once i go past the 20k mark ik i'm screwed. but! sometimes i make them 30k-isk one shots and say fuck it overwhelming lengths :')

14. Do you take requests?

. would love to! but anxiety and low self-esteem don't really work in my favour here

15. Angst or fluff?

. angst! tho i'm never sure how much of what i write actually is angst? let's say it feels more something like hurt/comfort

#omg there's so many!!!!#thank you so much for humoring me with this #really #i'm gonna answer the others in a moment!!!!#thiamsxbitch #ask game

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safic4-m · 1 year

Text

💛🎭Please don't go on..

Pairing: Audrey Tindall x Fem Lector

Author's note: Hi people, so I missed this request and didn't remember what the person really wanted about, so this is what little I remember about her, some angst, soft and defending her partner.

Please if you them this send me a message so I can tag you, I'm really sorry.

Number of words: 958

~Master list~

One-shot

Wattpad

You knew something like this would happen at some point, you had told her, but she just ignored your words and kept it up. So when you came home to find Audrey crying in bed it broke your heart to see your wife in such a state.

The British woman is constantly pushing herself to keep going, ignoring all your warnings, the tiredness she felt, how her body was screaming for her to take a break.

-Sweetness,- you try to get her attention kneeling on the side of the bed.

-Sunshine,- you call out again, touching her back softly.

This action takes the woman off guard making her move away from you without turning to look at you.

-It's me, honey, you sit down next to her.

Recognizing your voice Audrey moves closer to you, burying her face in your stomach as she clings to you.

-You were right...- You can barely hear her words.

-Come over here,- wrapping her arms around your body and laying you both down to be in a more comfortable position.

You stay there for a while comforting her, rubbing her back, listening to her sobs getting louder.

-Do you want to talk about it? you ask, moving her hair out of her face so you can see her.

-They gave the role to a younger actress,- burying her face in your chest.

It hurt to hear those words come out of her mouth, she had spent the last few months building up her muscle mass to play a role in a movie, but again she had been ruled out because of her age. Audrey was a very dedicated actress, she gave her all for her work, always giving 100% but neglecting her own well being.

-I know you put a lot of effort into this, honey, what can I do for you?

-Cuddling,- she says barely audible.

You comply with her request, willing to show her all your love for her.

You had met the British woman many years ago, when you were just starting your career as a director, back then you were the direct assistant and she wasn't a very nice person either.

Flash back

-Cut!- shouts the director, making you startle, -What's wrong with this scene?- he asks on the air.

-If you let me have my say, I think if we change the lights a bit and focus on them directly, maybe I can give it a more dramatic effect,- you say timidly.-

I didn't ask for your opinion, you're just another pathetic wannabe who will end up failing like everyone else,- he spits angrily.

Before you can say anything about it, a certain blonde comes out to defend you.

-How dare you talk to her like that!- looking angrily at the man, -it is because of directors like you that this many good projects don't get the wreck they deserve...- being interrupted by you.

-Please stop...- knowing what the reprisals would be for this act.

-You have only one job and you are not even capable of doing it well,- struggling to free herself from your grip.

-Please don't go on...- seeing the anger written on the director's face. -Don't stop,- the man encouraged her in a sarcastic tone.

-You're an old fuddy-duddy who is not able to accept the opinions of others, that's why nobody wants to work with you and if it had been up to me, I would have rejected this role, but I had no other choice, so now I have to put up with you, but I've had enough of this," she finishes her speech trying to calm her breathing.

-Largo- says the director after a few seconds -you are both dismissed.

-We didn't even want to be here,- says the British woman before grabbing you by the wrist and dragging you outside.

After a few minutes you are still shocked by the previous events.

-I'm so sorry you got fired because of me.

-Why did you do it?- you ask without really understanding what his intentions are.

-I'd had enough of seeing how he treated you,- as if it were so obvious, -I'm Audrey, by the way.

-I know, y/n

End of flashback

From that moment on you and Audrey turned against the world, the British woman's outburst became well known among the people in the industry, generating that many people wanted to work with the woman who told her truths to the director, but she put only one condition, which was that you would also be part of the projects. This was the beginning of your career as a film director, showing what you were capable of, until you became one of the most recognized and awarded directors.

-Audrey... you try to call her just to see if she is asleep.

You carefully pull her away from you and leave the room to answer a call.

-Y/n, how are you?- says a man's voice on the other end of the line.

-Go to grade Ben,- you say angrily.

-I'm sorry about what happened, but we really needed a younger woman..., you know how it goes.

-I know, but you could have said something before too,- feeling your blood boil for what they did to your wife.

-We're good, right?

You cut the call and stand there for a moment while you try to calm your feelings or so you try until you hear the blonde calling you.

*****

-And the award for best actress goes to...?- you say the presenter and you feel Audrey grip your hand tighter.

-Audrey Tindall

Hearing her name the British woman gets excited and takes your face to kiss you, you can't help but be happy for her, watching as she goes up to receive her award.

-I am very honored to receive this award and I want to thank my wife Y/n for giving me the opportunity to participate in your project,- raising her award in the air, -I love you sweetheart.

-I love you too,- you reply from your place.

#american horror story #ahs #ahs roanoke #roanoke #audrey tindall #audrey #audrey tindall x reader #audrey x reader #sarah paulson #sarah paulson x reader

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