#this sweet thing shouldn't have set a foot on the Ice

[thestaroffeanor]

Elenwë, wife of Turgon and mother to Idril Celebrindal

Idril not pictured, I'm still recovering from the sugar coma little Tyelpe sent me into here xD

#my art #house of finwe #nolofinweans #tolkien #silmarillion #elenwe #another one for the family tree #radiant and soft-spoken #able to anchor her husband into being less stern #this sweet thing shouldn't have set a foot on the Ice #illustration #digital art

[eldritch-spouse]

Headcanon that Patches is a babysitter for Adelo and Adrul

I literally can see the 2000’s style sitcom where Admin told Patches to keep an eye on them and its end up total mayhem

[Oh, I adore this.]

The Staff as babysitters

Some staff members were initially blacklisted from nanny charges, like Vinnel and Morell, but actually- Most of the team isn't half-bad at this?

Vinnel is, although sometimes a bit too violent with others in front of the princes, very entertaining! They love seeing jester man juggle random (preferably sharp but he's been whipped warned about that) things and tell dumb jokes. He's really perfect for cheering up the little lads and making sure they still see the bright side of things. Adelo's going to absorb some of his mean-spirited humor.

While most people thought Morell would get weird, maybe have some odd urge to cook a god's offspring, he's actually very protective of the kiddos, and determined to cook for them. They're not allowed to enter the kitchen at random however, as no one wants them entering and seeing fresh kills. He would like to teach them how to make animal traps. Adrul specifically loves the chef's baking and has made cakes with him before. Adelo is surprisingly the one with the bigger stomach.

Patches is a nervous, nervous man. While initially a bit awkward, if not fearful regarding his lord's children, he tries to do his best. Problem is, the pumpkin-headed man is at times a little too lenient, and allows the siblings to touch lab equipment they shouldn't while he screams inside. If nothing else, he can take them outside, to one of the nearby stables, and tickle them pink with random horse facts. It would be his pleasure to teach them to ride. Although he sometimes enters long-winded rants that have Adelo groaning and Adrul's eyes twinkling.

Grimbly* knows about as much on how to take care of kids as he knows on how to build a spaceship, which is to say he's got no fucking idea what he's doing. So he settles for buying the princes pretty things and taking them out for ice cream. Because kids like shiny things, right? And sweets? Yeah. Adelo always manages to put a dent in his wallet (now he knows how Santi feels) and Adrul mostly just enjoys it when the bat tries to doll him up, as his centipede-like body is hard to work with.

(*By this point, he has transformed into his older form.)

Santi actually just straight up vomited when he felt Adelo's presence, Adrul's makes him enter a panic... Yeah. Even if direct contact with them is off the table while they grow, the incubus does feel fondness for the princes and occasionally sends them whatever children's toy is most popular these days.

Nebul is a great monster to pair the princes with when Belo's not around. Due to his increased sensitivity to other people's emotions, the wraith can more easily detect when one of the siblings is feeling depressed or anxious. Both kiddos think he "talks funny", his monotone voice being a source of great amusement apparently. The wraith is generally witty and good at showing them interesting new things. While they may never set foot in the shop for obvious reasons, Purpur is often brought out to play with them. Adrul likes to give the tentacle ball rides on his back.

Gallon is exasperated with the amount of times Adrul and Adelo ask to drink alcoholic beverages. One of them almost got his hands on an unsupervised Willow Twister and the slime's heart nearly stopped. He makes iced tea for them and says it's whiskey. It works for now. Adelo is very amused by the way he can stretch, so the angel will sometimes just run off with a tendril and she how long he can make it before Gallon pretends he's in great pain.

Fank-e is another one the little princes like a lot. Probably because he's loud and constantly decked in shiny weird stuff. Plus, he has a seemingly limitless supply of old Internet jokes and forgotten media. It's safe to say both Adelo and Adrul leave his hands covered in stickers, with three new bracelets and maybe a little too hyper for their own good. Nobody wants to deal with two hyper and powerful monster kids.

Sybastian's got a bit of experience from handling mimiclings, unfortunately Admin and Belo don't like it all that much when he tries to put either one of the siblings in his mouth for carrying. Even if both of them seem to have a lot of fun. The mimic is not the best for conversation, and maybe he shouldn't be trusted with cooking either, but he can keep the brothers safe in the garden while they play and torment Hellion.

Ludwig is a honorable mention, because after he gets serious help and becomes functional again, Admin does want the demon to be a part of her life and will let the children have contact with him. Lud is happy for her and treats the kiddos with nothing but love. He's a decent babysitter but he does need more of a filter when it comes to swearing. Adrul and Adelo call him "uncle Ludwig", and that makes him sentimental.

#Patches oc #Santi oc #Grimbly oc #Morell oc #Vinnel oc #Fank-e oc #Nebul oc #Gallon oc #Sybastian oc #Ludwig oc

[forthedancingandthethriving]

(Context)

"Ugh.." Lil Coding groans, curling up on his bed. Every part of his body throbbed and ached, and it felt like he was on fire.

A soft bark from beside his bed made him roll over, opening his eyes. His tail gently thumps against the bed, seeing Eggdog and Beeg SMG4.

"Oh.. Hey, you guys.." he mutters as he carefully pushes himself up into a sitting position. "What're you doing here, Eggdog? Shouldn't you be watching Eggpup?"

Beeg SMG4 and Eggdog look at each other.

(In the Internet Graveyard, with SMG3 off further into the Graveyard with a dead meme problem with SMG1's help, Eggpup was left in charge. Currently, the young meme stood atop the Starbucks, watching the dead memes below work.

"Mmm.. good.")

"Borf." Eggdog shakes her body, letting Lil Coding know he didn't need to worry about that.

"Mph.. okay.." Lil Coding nods, laying back down on his bed.

"Ough?" Beeg SMG4 hops onto the code's bed, Eggdog following.

"Not great.." the child grumbles. "Domain says that if I take the medicine, I'll be better by the end of the week.. but.."

He glances over at the desk. "It's all the way over there and.. oh..!"

In a flash, Beeg SMG4 had come over with the pills, holding the bottle proudly. He opens it before, with Eggdog's help, shaking two out and passing them to the Code Manifestation.

"Thanks.." Lil Coding mumbles with a smile, taking the pills. As Beeg SMG4 screws the lid back shut and sets them on the nightstand, he curls back up and closes his eyes.

The two pets made themselves comfortable, staying vigilant as they watched over their sick friend.

And it was a good thing they were because something rushes in and then out of the room, startling the duo. "Da fuck?!"

The pets quickly hopped off of the bed and rushed after whoever it was that ran in and then out. Though the confusion turned to anger upon seeing Depresso the clown, and the fact that he was holding the pill bottle.

Eggdog didn't even let him say anything, quickly jumping at the clown, growling and snarling the whole time as she began to viciously rip and tear at him. Beeg SMG4 didn't hesitate to rush over, joining in on it.

(Lil Coding mumbles to himself, ears flicking. Great, he was getting so sick he was imagining hearing Depresso get the shit beat out of him.)

○●○

Eggdog and Beeg SMG4 narrow their eyes around the corner of one of the basement walls, seeing Depresso with the pill bottle. It was obvious what he was going to try and do, but the duo wasn't going to have any of that. Not when Lil Coding was still sick!

Eggdog let out a growl to think before a lightbulb appears over her head. She begins to whisper to Beeg SMG4, who began to vibrate with mischievous energy.

"Hehe, boy.."

Only a few moments later, a shout of "Hey FUCKER!" makes the clown turn around, shouting an "OH MY GOD!" as his eyes bludge out of his school.

Eggdog stood on top of Beeg SMG4, where Eggpup stood on her mother's head. Behind them were all of the Eggdogs from the coral.

"WE WON'T LET THOSE FUCKERS TAKE THIS LAND!"

With the war cry from Eggpup, the Eggdogs descended upon a screaming Depresso.

○●○

"What in the..?" SMG4 narrows his eyes, seeing the foyer trashed a bit. It was as if a fight had taken place. He shares a look with SMG3 before the duo quickly rush to Lil Coding's room.

"LC?" SMG4 calls out gently, pushing the door open.

There, the parents are able to see Lil Coding sleeping peacefully on his bed, with an ice pack on his head. Beeg SMG4 hovers near the headboard of the bed while Eggdog paces back and forth by the foot of the bed.

Upon seeing their respective owner, the pets let out happy noises and rush over to them, quickly being scooped into their arms.

"Aw, did you guys take care of Lil Coding while we were gone?" SMG4 smiles. "That's so sweet!"

"What are you chewing on?" SMG3 narrows his eyes at Eggdog, quickly yanking something out of her mouth. SMG4 looks at his partner's hand, seeing some blue fabric.

"The hell?" the two ask in sync before getting their answer to someone shouting down in the basement. The parents look at Eggdog and Beeg SMG4, who were both exuding a very smug energy.

"I'm not even mad." SMG3 chuckles, nuzzling his cheek against Eggdog, while SMG4 rolls his eyes with a smile.

#code: lil coding #beeg smg4 #smg4 depresso #eggdog #eggpup #smg4 #smg3 #fanfiction: my writing! #!posts! #episode idea

[starlightshadowsworld]

Byakuya slowly thawing and becoming soft for Makoto is one of my favorite things no matter what setting cuz like- Him realizing in a moment of silence that he found someone that doesn't want to take advantage of him or his money, he found someone who would truly love him despite his flaws and rocky edges and won't flake away. He broke his armor and when present with his heart Makoto didn't crush it or break it like he thought he would. Makoto like actually loves and cares him like woah??? sorry for the paragraph but they are just sooo 🥰🥰

They are, please it's very okay I love paragraphs. I read this like 3 times because oh my lord I love them.

I love this because Byakuya's whole life has revolved around being great. That he needs to be the best, that others are below him. That there's no need for him to form attachments because they will use him, it's how he got his ultimate title by defeating his half siblings.

And so he keeps that facade up when he attends Hope's Peak, literally just "I'm not here to make friends" thing.

Byakuya has never met someone like Makoto, never met someone who's so earnest and genuine, wears his heart on his sleeve and is just kind. And when he first meets him he dismisses Makoto.

Thinks of him as Makoto is nothing but a naive little lamb about to be slaughtered.

But Byakuya quickly realises that he is wrong, that Makoto is smarter than he seems, that he's very perceptive and helps others without some ulterior motive.

And he wants to know why but to do so he allows himself to get closer to him. And Makoto breaks every wall he's every put, and Byakuya finds himself terrified because he realises he trusts Makoto. Trusts him with his life, that Makoto Naegi is his safe place.

That with him he doesn't have the same pressures as he would usually, he's able to just breathe.

Byakuya seeing the parts of Makoto that he should find annoying or childish because that's what he was raised to see and instead finds them endearing and sweet.

He likes those parts of Makoto, his sheepish smile, the way his eyes light up and when he puts his foot down and makes a stand Byakuya can't take his eyes off him.

He's terrified because he's let Makoto take his heart, and to his utter surprise Makoto holds his heart with the most delicate of hands.

Makoto can read him like a book and he doesn't turn away, he doesn't hate him. He can tell Byakuya is trying to be better which makes Byakuya want to be better. He's utterly smitten and he would fight for Makoto if need be.

Byakuya who iniates hugs, let's himself slowly be vulnerable and Makoto never laughs nor teases him. He's encouraging and kind and he thaws Byakuya's ice cold heart with his warm touch.

In the games this man went against the whole Future Foundation because he trusted Makoto's judgement. (Honestly the relief this man must've had when not only was Makoto alive but innocent, and knowing he shouldn't have doubted him ever... the guilt and just vowing to make it up to him)

In any setting, Byakuya will always end up having his heart thawed by Makoto who holds it like its something to treasure. Byakuya he holds Makoto in such a high regard and he can't deny it. Not that he ever would or could.

Just ahhh them 🥰🥰

#Byakuya Togami #Ah yes my naegami thesis #Naegami #Danganronpa #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #makoto naegi

[luvlysangi]

fight :: san

*.~ pairing: collegebf!san x fem y/n character

*.~ warnings: swearing, relationship arguments

*.~ genre: angsty angst, fluffy at the end tho!~

*.~ Wattpad

*.~ ost: wonderland by ateez

*.~ masterlist

*.~ sign up to be notified for future fics

Laughter filled the apartment hallway as you and your tutee, Song Mingi, walked closer to your door. Your laughter subsided once you both reached your door and you fiddled with the keys in your hand.

"Professor Baskin never gave us that example in my class. Haha that's funny though I mean, it's not wrong! As long as it helps understand the concept better."

Mingi chuckled and leaned against the wall by the door, "What example did he give your class?"

"He said with the coping of craving concept, an example of one of the methods of distraction would be to just eat ice cream to distract you from doing the thing your addicted to. For your class example he told you guys a good distraction would be to have sex?! Honestly I can see him saying that he's funny like that." (A/N: just psych major class tingz shh xD)

As you both laughed again you finally find the key to your apartment.

"Hey, thanks for tutoring me. I thought tutoring would be boring and annoying but...it's fun with you." Mingi told you with a smile.

"Yeah. I have fun with you too Mingi!"

"So...same time tomorrow?"

"Sure! And if you want to change the time just send me a text, you have my number."

He gave you a cute smile and a thumbs up, "Okie sounds good! Bye-bye, y/n!~"

"Bye-bye Mingi!~ thanks for walking me home!~" you said as he turned to leave.

You began to put the key in the knob but you found the door already open with a crack.

The door wasn't like this when you got here...

You pushed the door open and stepped into the dim-lit living room. You kicked your shoes off and closed the door behind you.

"San! Are you here?" You called out for your boyfriend who you thought left the door open for you.

You turn on the lights and you get startled by a pissed-off looking San sitting on the couch staring back at you with his eyebrows furrowed. You raised a brow in confusion and you plopped your backpack down.

"Sanie? What's wrong?" You asked tilting your head.

"How could you?! I offered to pick you up from school today but you told me you were stuck at tutoring and you come back with a guy?!" He immediately snapped.

"San! It's not what you think. Mingi is my tutee he just needs some help in psychology and the tutoring center-"

San stood up from the couch with a stomp of his foot, "I don't give a shit who the fuck Mingi is."

Silence fills the air as shivers ran down your back. You really love your boyfriend but he would get pretty scary when he's upset. His glares were cold and deep which made him appear scary when he's upset. If you could compare San to the weather, you'd say that he's a thunderstorm. A 100% chance of it to be exact. His booming yelling voice was like thunder, loud and deep. His glare was as sharp as lightning.

Regardless, you had to set him straight. He was being upset for no reason, at least you found no reason for him to be.

"Choi San, what is your problem?!" You asked getting frustrated.

"My problem, y/n, is that you turned me down for some guy!"

"As I said, our tutor session was taking longer than expected and he nicely offered to walk me home. Shouldn't you be glad I'm back here safe and sound?!"

"You're a dumbass, y/n! He clearly likes you from the way he talked to you! He could just advance on you any momen-"

You scoffed, "Unfuckingbelievable!!! Mingi is not like that! He's a real sweet guy and he's funny and he can be shy sometimes but still, he would never do that!! You can't make assumptions!!"

San darkly chuckled, "The way you're talking about him like that is also unfuckingbelievable. You like-"

You cut him off, "Shut up! I do not! For your-"

"I WAS FUCKING SPEAKING!" San raised his voice with another stomp of his foot to the hardwood floor.

"ME TOO, DAMN IT SAN!! YOU'RE SO INSECURE OVER ME THAT'S A REAL PROBLEM, SIR. HOW CAN WE BE IN A RELATIONSHIP IF YOU DONT EVEN TRUST YOUR PARTNER!!!"

San breathed heavily in frustration after you raised your voice at him. If he was a thermostat, the red level would be all the way to the top. He ran his fingers through his long black bangs and they carelessly fell over his eyes. His fiery eyes piercing through your soul.

He extended his arm out, pointing to the corner wall.

"Time out. Now."

You scoffed, "What am I? 3?"

"Don't make me put you there myself."

"You're not my mom. Why do I need a time out?! Clearly you're upset because I'm right!"

San growled and marched up to you fast making you quickly back into the corner he assigned you to. You jumped when he slammed his hand to the wall next to your face making you quickly look away from him in fear.

"Look at me." He said to you.

You shook your head and continued to close your eyes and look away from his close intimidating gaze.

San grabbed your chin and forced you to face him, "LOOK AT ME BITCH!!!"

You whimpered a little and tried to pull his hand off your face but he wouldn't budge.

"You don't understand how terrified I am when we're not together for many hours. I worry about you and how you're doing. Don't say that I don't trust you when I do! I've always trusted you, but there's still this feeling deep inside me that makes me worry about you. We go to different universities how am I supposed to know what the guys on your campus are like? The guys on mine are probably twice as worst."

Your expression softened as San told you all of this now. He let go of your chin, dropping his hand back down to his side. It's true, you didn't really tell San much about your school besides how you're doing in classes. Other than that you both would always talk about other things. You also really didn't know how students were on his campus, but you always trusted him so the thought never occurred to you.

His angered expression lightened and San quickly turned into a sad puppy.

"I'm trying to be a good boyfriend but I don't even see you for 7 hours of the day and I don't even know what I can do for you with the extra hours that we have in the day. All I can do is worry for you and try to make you smile when you come home but I couldn't even do that today as we're here right now in this mess! I'm sorry if I'm...insecure. I'm sorry if I've made you think I'm an insecure boyfriend..."

You frowned as San's hand went up to his mouth and he began to cry. The thunder and lightning had stopped and now, it was just raining. You quickly embraced him in a hug.

"Baby, don't cry...I'm sorry for calling you insecure. I didn't know you felt this way. San, you're a wonderful boyfriend I really would never choose any other guy. You're perfect to me just the way you are. You make me so happy and I'm very happy you're my boyfriend. I'm thankful that you think about me and worry about me, that shows me that you care. I also worry and think about you when you're not with me too. I'm sorry I got angry at you."

San sniffed and you wiped his tears, "Me too. I didn't listen to you and I called you terrible names."

You shushed him, "Shh, Shh, it's okay now. Let's maybe try to find some times where I can come visit you at your school and hang out with you and you can do the same at mine. So that way we both know more about each other's school lives better and we feel more comfortable with each other when each of us have to go to classes and such. How's that sound?"

San looked up at you from the hug and gives you a smile with a nod, "I'd like that."

You wiped his remaining tears with your thumb with a smile back, "Me too. We're gonna be okay, alright?"

He nodded again and leaned in to kiss your lips. You return the kiss back and it was official, you both made up. The storm had parted and now your sun was back in the sky.

#ateez fluff #ateez drabbles #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #atz fanfic #ATEEZ #ATEEZ Fanfic #Kpop Fanfic #ateez fanfic #emiwrites #atz san #choi san #kpop angst #ateez angst #san angst #ateez x y/n #kpop x y/n #ateez #okay but when san does that move when he sings his line in wonderland nugunganeun gaya hal got is what inspired this whole thing lol #angry san is stage san lol

[evafrechette]

I’ll take one large cock..err I mean Coke please

↠ yoongi x jungkook | smut | drivethruworker!jk | 18+ | 2.7k

↠ Summary: It’s been the shift from hell and all Jungkook wants to do is go home, jerk off and get some well deserved rest. But the attractive brunette with the deep, raspy voice that gets his cock twitching has just pulled into his drive thru and Jungkook’s night is about to get even crazier.

↠ Warnings: masturbation, frottage, car sex, awkward crushes, public sex, handjobs, yoongi hates mcdonalds but likes jungkook.

"Welcome to McDonald's, can I take your order please." Jungkook's voice cracked out of the decades old drive thru speaker while he absentmindedly twirled a straw between his tattooed fingers.

"Uh yeah just a Large Cheeseburger Combo. Uhhh and make the drink an Iced Americano please." Jungkook dropped the straw, which rolled along the ground towards the "broken" ice cream machine. He knew that low raspy voice, the one that was slightly slurred making it hard to understand exactly what was said. It came out of the cutest pouty mouth Jungkook had ever seen.

"Uhh oh y-yes, okay, please drive up to the next window." He hastily brushed his hands through his inky black waves and straightened out the hat that sat lazily on top of his head. Jungkook had a crush. A huge crush. The kind of crush your friends and family would mock you about for years to come. The cutie with the deep voice had been visiting Jungkook's McDonalds drive thru for nearly a year now, always ordering the same thing - a Large Cheeseburger Combo with an Iced Americano. He was the prettiest man Jungkook had ever seen; a soft round button nose, the most breathtakingly stunning feline shaped eyes, pale skin that reminded him of a shimmering full moon, and those lips, small, pouty and Jungkook was dying to know what they would look like wrapped around his cock.

He tapped his foot nervously against the brown tile floor as he tried to push the thought out of his head. He was at work he shouldn't be thinking about his cock and the sweet, pretty little mouth he dreamt of most nights taking him so deep into his throat that tears fell from his eyes as he gagged and moaned around him.

Jungkook let out a small squeal when he noticed the man's car roll up to his window. Hesitantly he opened the sliding glass, "Hi, umm your order isn't ready yet, please park up over there," he pointed towards the waiting area, "and someone will bring it out as soon as possible." The brunette smiled at him as he paid for the order then slowly drove towards the designated parking spot. Jungkook dropped to the floor crouching out of view, his heart was thumping against his ribs. He took a few minutes to calm himself down before returning to his mundane, tedious work.

The day seemed to drag on longer than usual for Jungkook, anything that could go wrong did. The coffee machine in the café side broke down, his coworker and best friend Jimin was burnt by hot oil in the fryer and had to be rushed off to A&E and Jungkook had slipped on some melted ice bruising both his knees during impact. By the time his shift was over he was well and truly over the day, but he had agreed to cover Taehyung's night shift (and hey, extra pay wasn't anything to scoff at)

He had a quick break, scoffing down some chicken nuggets before washing them down with a large Fanta, then fit the microphone headpiece back in place and waited for the craziness of the dinner rush. As expected the next 3 hours were insane, car after car seemed to flow past his window. His feet were burning from standing all day, eyes feeling heavy from exhaustion but he still had 4 more hours before closing.

-----

With only an hour to go the staff that remained locked the front doors, the drive thru now the only option for anyone with a late night craving for greasy burgers and burnt fries. Jungkook was able to finally rest his swollen feet, laying down in a booth hands folded under his head. He had just started to feel himself drift off when the static of the speaker box vibrated in his ear, the telltale sign of a car pulling up dragged him from his near slumber.

"Hello Welcome to McDonalds," a yawn broke free, his hand automatically rushing up to cover his nose, "Mmm sorry, can I take your order."

"Yeah, one Large Cheeseburger combo with an Iced Americano please"

Jungkook's eyes were as large as saucers as he flung himself out of the booth and ran towards the drive thru window. It was that delicate, ethereal man again, he'd never worked nights before so hadn't expected to see him again.

"I'm sorry, b-but the McCafe is closed, you'll have to order from the soft drink menu." He checked himself out in the reflective metal bench in front of where he stood, he was sure he looked like hell but there was little he could do, not that he could see anything anyway the bench was scattered with serviettes and spilled soft drink.

"That's okay, I'll just take a large Coke then."

"Sure thing, please drive up to the next window."

The car arrived within seconds, the only vehicle in the drive thru so late at night. Jungkook stood awkwardly, eyes darting between the man in the car and the crew in the back taking their sweet ass time to get the order ready. He huffed and slid the window open.

"Do you mind parking up and someone will bring your order out for you?"

"Yeah, thanks." The man paid then pulled up into the vacant waiting area. With his headlights turned off the car was invisible in the dark of the night. Jungkook let out another yawn and rubbed his tired sleepy eyes. He walked into the back just as his co-worker was folding over the brown paper bag.

"Can you take this out to him, I really need to use the bathroom." The bag was thrust into his arms as the night manager Namjoon ran past him towards the toilet block. He sighed, obviously he had no choice but to deliver this meal to the most gorgeous man to walk the earth. God was really testing him today.  Jungkook removed his headpiece leaving it by the cash register, unlocked the front door and stepped into the chilly night.

He shivered before running towards the only car in empty space. He knocked gently on the driver side window and shifted off each foot while he waited for the window to be rolled down. There was no response. He tried to peer through the tinted glass but was unable to see anything so he knocked once more, this time a lot louder. The window rolled down part of the way and Jungkook could see the top of the man's face.

"Thanks, just slip it through." His voice was strained and a little pitchy.

Jungkook shifted his weight onto his left foot "Yeah, that's not gonna work you need to lower the window more."

A panicked no was the man's response. Jungkook was getting a little pissed off, he had been working non stop all day and just wanted to go home, have a quick jerk off session and then sleep.

"Dude, you need to open the window or I'm just dumping your shit on the ground." Jungkook didn't mean to snap, and not at the man he'd secretly been in love with for so long. But he was just so over his day.

Slowly the window lowered and Jungkook was able to see the man's face. Just as soft and perfect as always, except he had a pink tinge to his cheeks. Jungkook thought it looked beautiful, a gorgeous contrast to his pale skin. He went to pass the bag through when his eyes flickered downwards. Jungkook choked when his eyes fell upon a very thick and very hard cock peaking out between the man's legs. His jeans were pushed halfway down his legs and his right hand was clenched around the base of his shaft. Jungkook wasn't sure what to do. He'd been picturing the man's cock for months and now he was seeing it in the flesh, he was turned on and slightly overwhelmed.

The man used his free hand to grab the bag and nonchalantly threw it on the passenger seat. Jungkook was unable to remove his eyes from the brunette's cock, his tongue flicked out as he licked along his lip. When realisation set in of what he had just done, his face turned beetroot red and he spun around to run back to the safety of the store.

But before he could the man spoke, "Do you like what you see?"

Jungkook froze, it was pretty obvious he did, but he couldn't say that . . could he?

"Y-y-yes." He replied, his stutter making him cringe internally.

"Get in." It was more of a question than a demand and Jungkook felt a little better to know he wasn't the only one affected by what was happening. He walked to the door directly behind where the man sat and slowly opened it, he quickly looked around to make sure no one was watching before climbing into the back seat. They sat in silence for a while, Jungkook twisting his hair around his finger - a nervous habit of his and the man stared at him with those intense piercing eyes through the rare view mirror.

-----

After a few minutes Jungkook heard light whimpers come from the front and leaned forward between the empty space of the two front seats. The man was stroking his length slowly, cautiously watching Jungkook's every move in the mirror. Jungkook sat quietly and watched with attentive eyes at the scene unfolding in front of him. He longed to reach out and feel that soft translucent skin, to see his cum dripping all over the tattoos that were etched into his skin. But his body couldn't move, glued to the spot he was in.

Jungkook watched as the man's chest rise and fell, how his cock twitched every time a low moan escaped Jungkook's lips and at the precum that was leaking from the tip, helping to lubricate the man's slide.

"You are so fucking pretty," The deep mumbly voice broke the silence reverberating around the stifling space, "The first time I saw you I thought you were the prettiest guy I've ever seen. I fucking hate McDonald's, it tastes like shit. But I keep coming back because I want to see you."

"What the fuck." Jungkook couldn't believe what he was hearing, his dream man thought he was pretty? And only ordered food to see him? No wonder he had never seen him order inside the store. He shifted in his seat, his cock starting to ache from how hard it was. The man was still watching through the rare view mirror and had noticed.

"Get it out if you want, bit weird for me to be the only one with my dick out."

Jungkook quickly unzipped his trousers and yanked them down letting them land on the floor with a soft thud. He leaned into the back seat and spat onto his palm, wincing once he finally felt the tight grip of his hand relieve some of the pressure building up inside of him. He felt a little silly, legs open wide, knees bruised, white socks, black sneakers, McDonald's work shirt and hat still on, but the man staring back at him didn't seem to mind one bit of his appearance. Maybe he had a uniform kink?

Together they pumped their cocks, eyes locked onto one another's via the mirror. Their hushed breaths synchronised, the thrill of what they were doing drew Jungkook closer to his release. "Shit, I'm gonna c-cum soon. C-can I feel you? Please, I've wanted it for so long." The eyes staring back at him flashed a desire Jungkook had never seen in anyone before.  The man pushed his pants off fully and scrambled into the back with Jungkook. Jungkook reached out hesitantly and stroked his fingers along the man's face, along his strong eyebrows, down his cute little nose, along his soft jawline and of course his sweet lips.

"So what's your name anyway? I'm Jungkook." he asked as he leaned in and started to kiss the man's exposed neck, hands hovering over his creamy white thighs.

"Yoongi."

"A pretty name for a pretty little thing. Perfect." Jungkook continued to suck deep purple marks onto Yoongi's neck, he hadn't given a hickey since he was a teenager, but he wanted to mark the man up so badly. He could feel Yoongi's hands knead at his soft ass, squeezing the flesh, running his finger along his crack, teasing at the entrance of his hole.

Without warning Jungkook detached from Yoongi's neck and pushed his smaller body against the backseat. He straddled Yoongi's thighs, shifting so their cocks were centimeters apart. He reached down between their bodies and held his cock in one hand and Yoongi's in the other, then pressed them firmly against each other. Jungkook whimpered, Yoongi was so hard and warm against his cock, which was now throbbing and leaking a small amount of precum. Jungkook ran his thumb over his slit, collecting as much of the clear fluid as he could before rubbing his thumb over the tip of Yoongi's cock, his fingers traced around the head, slowly moving down his length, with feather light touch. Jungkook closed his fingers around Yoongi's girth and moved his hand up and down covering him with his arousal. He stroked him a few times before taking both cocks into his tattooed hand and pushed them together. They both cried out at the contact of their pulsating cocks against one another.

Jungkook jerked them both off, squeezing and pumping eager to see Yoongi come undone under him. Yoongi arched his hips grabbing on tight to Jungkook's thighs and started thrusting in time with Jungkook. In response Jungkook ground his cock against Yoongi's even harder, his balls slapping against the large pair that hung below Yoongi's thick cock. They rocked and rutted against each others warm, smooth lengths. The windows of the car were fogged - evidence of something seedy taking place inside, Yoongi's burger and fries no longer warm, but neither took any notice too focused on chasing their climax.

Yoongi came first spurting ropes of hot cum all over his shirt while he choked out a deep, vibrating sob. Jungkook looked down and saw the creamy white fluid dripping down his fingers and over the faded black ink, his cock pulsated in his grip. Jungkook's gut tightened and his vision went blurry, he spilled his release all over his and Yoongi's cocks.

Jungkook's heart was racing just like it had been earlier in the day, he couldn't believe that the man he had be fantasising about was laying under him cock out and covered in his cum. Yoongi flashed him a gummy smile, one he had seen many times from the other side of the drive thru window. Up close it was even more lovely his perfect little teeth lined up straight, eyes crinkling in the corners.

"Jungkook! Jungkook! Where the fuck are you man?" Jungkook's head snapped towards Namjoon's booming voice echoing throughout the carpark. He looked at Yoongi panicked but the smaller man didn't seem worried in the slightest. Yoongi pulled his T-shirt up over his head and used it to clean the sticky mess off Jungkook's hand.

"Put your pants back on and act like nothing happened. Just say I'm an old friend and we were catching up or something. I'll come and see you tomorrow . . errr later this morning on my way to work. You know my order right?"

Jungkook quickly did what Yoongi told him and gave him a fond smile before climbing out into the bleak cold night.

"Namjoon-ah!!" Jungkook yelled into the darkness not quite sure where his manager was. The sound of frantic footsteps alerted him and he turned to face a very pissed off Namjoon. His jaw was clenched and his mouth was turned downwards. Jungkook had seen this face only once before, when Namjoon had lost his shit and fired someone on the spot for trying to deep fry a soft serve cone.

He gulped hard, "Sorry Namjoon that's an old friend of mine," he motioned towards the car, "I guess we lost track of time."

Namjoon sighed "You're lucky no one has showed up in the last hour besides your friend over there. Come on, it's time to clean this place for the morning crew and then we can get the hell out of here and get some sleep."

As Jungkook walked back to the dimly lit building he couldn't help but smile with the knowledge that Mr Cheeseburger and Iced Americano would be rolling up to his drive thru window in just a few hours to see him. He was lovin' it.

#bts smut #bts fanfic #yoongi smut #Jungkook smut #yoonkook #yoonkook fanfic #bts fanfction #suga #jungkook #yoongi #I wrote a fic inspired by McDonald’s fml #armywriterssupport #bts #bangtan #bts imagines #bangtaninn

[impala1967dwinchester]

Sam Winchester: Out of the closet

Pride Collection 2021 June 5th

Pairing: AU! Sam W. x Sister!Reader

Pov: Y/n

Warnings: Coming out, support from a family member. Mentions of Dean and John.

Summary: Finally feeling comfortable you tell Sam your biggest secret, but you think NO you know he can handle it seeing as he is your big brother.

Word Count: 1.4k

A/N- Bisexual, @firefly-graphics for the bisexual dividers Supposed to be posted on the 5th of June, but was unfortunately postponed to the 6th of June

Sam Winchester Master List

Main Master List

Pride Collection Master List 2021

Today is the day that I'm going to tell Sam my most important secret.

I've had this secret for years now. It started my last year in high school, and with Sam being the older brother is, when he left for college he took me with him.

Anyways, He got me set up in an apartment, he came and visited me every other day. Going to class, and just being normal was nice, and it lasted for a while.

There was a party for the seniors that year. I toyed with the idea of dressing up and going out or just stayin' home and studying. I was very much Sammy when it came to my schooling. Something that I'd just learned from him over the years.

I just made a choice deciding that one night of partying wouldn't hurt me or my schooling. So I dressed up in a short red dress, black flats, and the only thing I had taken with me before leaving Dean and John.

Slipping into a black jacket that was a size too big, but smelled like my older brother Dean. I grabbed my keys and left. I had never gone to a party if you don't include the father-daughter dance that John half-ass took me to the Sam ended up having to save me from. Or the random school dances that I had.

Showing up to this party everyone's eyes were on me. It was a weird sensation to be stared at but in a sorta good way. In a way that made me wonder.

Very quickly I had a few guys surrounding me, their actions were pointless as I ignored them, and I left them to discuss between themselves. One good thing that John has taught me was not to take shit from anyone, I think he forgot that also meant him.

But regardless of that, I went to go see if I could find a few friends. I was met with a beautiful woman, her long legs covered in jeans with thigh-laced-up boots and a relieving t-shirt.

It didn't click then, or later on when I was tapped on the shoulder by a taller version of the woman. He had short blonde hair, dressed like every other jock, but the immediate feeling, sense I got from him was nothing but lust.

Now it's been seven years, seven years for me to try out things with many different people, and figuring myself out along the way. I've come to the conclusion that I don't just like the men that serve me coffee in the morning, or the women that I do yoga with.

Sam's older now, just by a year his beautiful wife and his kids, live in a small starter home at the end of our quiet town. Sam's wife has always taken a liking to me. And their kiddos call me Auntie.

It all around a great part of my life to be around my family. To be around so much love and admiration for each other. But the fear of saying the truth, the fear of telling my older brother makes me worry.

Makes me worry that I'll spill the truth on a silver platter and be told I'm not worthy of that love and admiration that I crave to have, that I enjoy seeing.

Sometimes it floats around, I can see even if it for just a brief moment. I can it flutter around Sam's kids, or him and his wife the way they share just a longing happy look for each other.

"I hate to bother you two live birds, but I was wondering if I could take the kiddos out for ice cream?" I ask Sammy, he smiles and says "Sure just be careful. Love ya." I gather their two kids up and well chase each other to my car.

In moments like this, I sometimes wish I already had kids. I also wish that their uncle and grandfather could be here to see them grow and flourish into strong men and strong women.

But regardless, we listen and sing along to a special playlist that we made together. Just a thing for the three of us to enjoy. "Auntie, play our songs please!"

Sam's youngest says her politeness reminds me of him. "Yeah, Auntie you gotta play our songs and sing along with us this time!" Sams oldest screams, he looks like Sam, but in reality, has the personality and swagger of Sam's wife.

We make it to our favorite ice cream place. They always get the same things, no matter the time of the season. "You two outta try something different," I say to them, they give me a look of 'How dare you to tell me to get something different.' I giggle, and we walk out to the shop.

Getting the kiddos back, and in bed was a task. They gave their kisses to me, and then to Sam. Their mother takes them to bed, so nows it's just my brother and me. "Good night pumpkins, Auntie loves you," I say Watching the two of them holding their hands and walk down the hallway.

There's no better time to tell him.

"Hey, are you okay Y/n?" Sam asks an almost empty beer in his hand. He's sitting across from me at the dinner table. I'm in my own thoughts, I'm brought back when I feel Sam's socked foot hit the bottom of my foot.

"Yeah, you could say that I'm okay," I say back, I'm starting to worry about what he might say, maybe I shouldn't say anything.

"Look, I'm your older brother, I know when somethin' is bothering you," Sam says with a hopeful look. I frown, I might as well say the truth, that's something that Sam and I promised each other when we left Dean and John.

"Nothing is bothering me, Sammy, I just need to say something to you and I don't know how to phrase it." He puts his beer down and get's up grabbing my hand and taking me outside.

He'd always done this with me when we were younger. Dragging me to the open yard, he plopped down to the grass and drug me with him. He'd tell me when I was young, to look up in the sky and feel the earth below me. To let go of worries, and be calm be thoughtful.

"Sam, what are we doing out here? We aren't kids anymore." I said closing my eyes. "Y/n just please, do this for me. Maybe you'll figure out a way to phrase your thoughts." He said

I thought as he told me to do. It was nice to feel everything around me and not so much worry about things. "Are you better now Y/n?" Sam asked, I opened my eyes and smiled.

"A little yeah," I said, I might as well just say it, let it be in the open. Regardless of what Sam may think, or even say I'm just going to go for it. That's at least one major thing, Sammy, as taught me over the years.

"Sammy.. I've thought long and hard about telling you and even saying this out loud, but I'm bisexual," I said getting up and looking at my older brother.

He'd yet to give me a reaction, no change in his facial expression, no words yet spoken. It was just quiet, the weird unsettling silence, that gives me anxiety. Makes me worry that the sweet moment between a brother and his sister will forever be lost, that I'll never get to see my nephew and niece again.

But before I know it I'm encased in Sam's overbearing arms, he's hugging me tightly, reassuring me that he loves me, tell me that he proud of me. Everything thought that I had was wrong. He's my brother, after all, he knows me better than anyone.

"Can I ask a question, peanut?" He said, using a nickname he'd used many years ago. We were still hugging, I hummed. "Am I the first person you've officially told?" Sam asked.

I thought a minute, my partners that I'd been with hadn't really known, so yeah Sam was the first to know. "Yeah, I think you are Sammy," I said holding on tight to his hug.

"I just want you to know that I love you, and I'm always here for you peanut. Why don't you and I go out for the weekend tomorrow? Spend some quality time together?!" He asked. I smiled and hummed.

There was nothing better than being excepted and loved. Not only that but it also felt like a thousand-pound rock had been lifted from my shoulders by telling Sam.

Completed on: 06/05/2021

Posted on: 06/06/2021

Tag List: @sweetdetectivequeen @wonderfulworldofwinchester @hobby27 @fofisstilinski @doctorlilo

#sam winchester #sam winchester x sister!reader #pride month #pride 2021 #supernatural #supernatural x reader #supernatural fic #supernatualfluff #coming out #coming out tw #tw vent #tw coming out #tw sensitive material #tw mental health #tw mental instability #sister #brother #lgbtq #pride lgbtg #sam winchester x reader #fem reader #sammy #sam fanfiction #samwinterchester #reader!Winchester #sam winchester x y/n

[silverrstarrr]

Normal girl (2)

Note: i just edit this chapter a bit and added more dialog. Someone messaged me and helped me out with a few things, thank you!

Chapter 2:

Walking side by side down the stairs, you took a sip of your coffee and place your herd of keys the side of your book bag. yume was scrolling through her phone on tik tok, drinking from her coconut Carmel ice coffee. You didn't understand why she was drinking ice coffee in mid February, it was cold. It was surprising their wasn't any snow.

Grinning like an idiot, she shaked your shoulder, positioning her phone in front of you–you both watched the tik tok. You didn't laugh at first only smiling, yume kept gesturing you to keep watching, waiting for the punchline. Finally it came up and you both started laughing, you slowly shaked your head placing your hand over your mouth.

"NOOO, nooo. That was so wrong, yall are going to hellll" you whined out.

Yume wiped the tears from her face and continued down the last step. She opened up the door and slid out, you trialing behind her. You both proceeded to walk down the street, where all the park cars were out.

"We riding in rich today girlie, jump in," she lifted up her arm that held her drink, her other reached into her purse and grabbed her car keys.

"I thought we were gonna walk there? It's only 10 minutes." You headed towards her car as she unlocked it and sat in the driver's seat. She had a 2018 dark Grey Nissan altima. You remember her having this ever since junior year, you recalled her talking about getting a newer model since this one was old. Like girl what? Old your ass, if the car still functioning there ain't no problem. White people shit, man.

"Well, it's the first day of sweet college life," she dragged out the last few words, adding a sarcastic tone. Yume tossed her bag in the backseat through the open space from the front, She dropped her drink in the little cup holder as well. Catching up with her, you open the backseat's door and chucked your bag in there–immediately closing it after. You pull the passengers door open and sat down, closing it behind you. Yume did the same–letting out a large sigh as she used her long sleeve to rub her legs, which were freezing.

"Bruh, you were just cold. Shouldn't have wore that skirt knowing it was this cold. Your mother would be disappointed," you moved your head side ways, pretending to be disappointed. You dropped your dunkin' drink in the other cup holder next to hers.

"Y/n, shut upp." Rolling her eyes jokingly, She grabbed the buckled next to her seat and puts it on. You placed your seat belt on too. Automatically, her phone connected to the car, you check over at the screen in the middle. It had the time, the degrees outside and all that other fancy things.

"Wanna play something?" she inserted the keys into the ignition and started the car.

"Yeah, I'll type it in,"

You grabbed her phone, showing the screen to her to unlock it, automatically recognizing her face– the lock screen slid up, revealing all her apps. You went to spotify and played "C U Girl" by Steve lacy.

"OKAAYYY, MS. INDIE TIK TOKER." Yume said nodding her, jamming to song. It was only going to be a 5 minute drive, or 7 if you guys couldn't find parking. She swerved to the left, leaving her parking space and pulling off. You whipped out your phone and paused your music, rapidly switching to snapchat–you heard yume's loud singing.

"I WANNA SEE YOU GUURRLL, I WANNA PLEASE YOU GIRL....GO AHEAD AND BE YOUR GIRL," This girl was jamming her out heart out, steve lacy was her favorite along with Brent faiyaz and many others.

In response, you started cackling as you hit the record button—swiftly turning over it to the driver. Her black ponytail moving as she sang and motioning her head in all different directions. Eyeing towards your direction she sees the phone and leans towards the camera flashing a smile, moving her head side to side—still singing through the lyrics. Yume returned back to the road as she lightly taps the steering, avoiding the horn of course.

Once the quick little vid was done, you added a caption,

"I swear if we crash😭😭💕"

Your thumb jolted between posting it on your private or public. You decided to post on the public story because why not? The song was over pretty quickly as the next one played.

"Who knew white people had rhythm?!" It was obviously sarcasm. You knew she was half Asian but it was fun always calling out her white side.

"Naaahh, white people don't have any rhythm. What you saw there was my miki matsubara pop out". She eases down her breaks– the traffic light turns red. Miki Matsubara? Oh yeah, it's that woman who sung "stay with me". It was a good song, you were obsessed with the chorus mostly. 

You giggled a bit at her remark, you checked your socials once again.

"If this light doesn-" Yume sentence was cut off by the light turning green. She pressed her foot on the gas and carried on with attending class.

                                  ~~~

Pulling up to the parking lot, yume leaned towards her wheel, searching for a place to park. She slowly went down each isle searching for a vacant lot she could snag. You had your drink in between your lips, you took the last sip and shook the plastic cup trying to get a little more. All you heard was ice rattling against one another, dropping the cup back in the holder. You peer out the window looking at the campus, there were a ton of kids, like a lot. Anxiety began spiking up through your veins, this really is the college life, huh? Maria University. It was a school for literally anything, it was one of the biggest universities in the country as well being highly diverse. Yume would be allll the way on the other side of campus while you're slightly in the middle.

"Uggghhh! I regret not leaving earlier, I don't see any open slots." She whined. This was her 2nd time driving around the parking lot looking for a space.

"I said we should walk but nahhh, you wanted to be lazy and take the car." You rolled your eyes as yume, exaggerating, throwing your hands in the air. But you weren't going to be late on the first day. As the generous queen you are, you aided your roomie with looking a space to park. After analyzing for a few moments, you spotted a space and immediately tapped at the window, pointing towards it. Yume car swerved to the left, sliding right into the parking. Taking her keys out the hole, she grabbed her drink and headed out.

"No leaving trash in my car, miss L/n!"

You grabbed your plastic cup and opened the passenger door.

"Yes ma'am," you opened the backseat and grabbed the two bags and closed the door. Beep yume locked her car. She was sipping her coffee but gave a bitter expression when her sweet drink was watered down because of the ice. You looked at your phone, checking the time:

                             8:38 am

                 Monday, February 18th

                                                               38m ago

Kittykiller27, prettygirlnene liked your photo

                                                               45m ago

[Andyhas]: CRONA BECK started following you and 48 others.

Your phone was blowing up from insta notifications. It was time for class and you weren't sure how long it'll even take you to find your classroom. Slinging the bag over your shoulder, you handed yume her own, which she grabbed. You both were speed walking, despite her coffee being ruined she still continued to drink it. It was for the caffeine you guessed. Reaching the sidewalks, it was time to part ways. Yume turned her face towards yours pouting.

"We're leaving each other nooww," she stuck out her bottom lip staring at you. You grabbed her arm, pulling her closer to you. Her arms slithered around your waist, resting her chin on your shoulder–giving you a warm hug. You returned the hug by grunting and holding her tightly.

She started giggling and patted your back a few times, you released your grip and she started to jog in the other direction while looking back, waving at you. You waved back hollering a "BYEEEE!" A trash can was next to you so you dumped your empty dunkin' there.

It was now time for your own adventure, to find this damn classroom. You click the play button on your phone's lock screen, "baby powder by Jenevieve began playing. (Play the song whores👩🏾‍💻)

Walking downwards to the left side of campus, you searched for a pair of doors to go inside of. At this moment, you regretted not going to orientation. That day you were busy setting up your website for your makeup line. You haven't released any products yet, but you had plentiful of ideas and themes you wanted to do. Since it was black history month, maybe you'll drop something as simple as a face cream to help clear and brighten up the skin. But you discarded that thought because you weren't anywhere near ready to start your own small business. Plus, you had bigger things to worry about.

Standing in front of double doors, you grab the handles and pulled it back, you stepped inside while students behind you did the same. You came in slowly, admiring the interior. It was hella spacy with paintings and photos hanging along the walls. Students were roaming the hallways going back and forth from classrooms. Most of the students seemed to be in some sort of costume, or they were dressed fairly well like they were models. You didn't know the directions to your designated class, so you took up the courage to ask someone. You turned to search for someone who didn't seem busy, since most people were rushing to class. Finally you laid eyes on q girl leaning against the wall, typing on her phone. She had long pink acrylic nails, her blonde hair tied into a low ponytail, which complimented her pale skin tone. She had a gold nose piercing on the right nostril.

She seemed nice enough, so you decided to approach her.

"Um excuse me, do you know where Mr. Fargo's class is at?"

The blonde girl averted her eyes from her phone, now focusing on you.

"I'm not really sure—um, I believe it's down that way." She pointed to the right of her.

"Mr. Fargo, he's teaches cosmetic right?"

"Yeah," you replied

"Then I think it should be down there." She scrunched her face in a confusing manner, meaning not to take her word for granted. But you couldn't care less, it was worth a try.

"Ight, thank you." You bid her goodbye. Oop. You accidentally switched your lingo. You were used to speaking in AAVE but you knew how to change your tone and wordplay around others who weren't African American. The girl didn't seen to notice so you just continued down the hall.

"Down... here right..? Yeah this is the way," you murmured to yourself while you strut down the hall. Then turned left as the lady told you. You were now at a hall with multiple doors. Out of all them, you forget the most important, class started in five minutes. You looked to the left as your braids swayed with your movement, then searched to the right. You walked down the hallway, stopping at the fifth door on the left. You were hesitant with grabbing the door, you didn't want to make a fool of yourself walking into the wrong room as all eyes are on you. You pulled out your phone and texted yume.

(I did a different message format just in the previous was confusing)

                 colonizer but times 2🧑🏻‍🦲

       

                        I'm so lost, this is embarrassing.

Lost? What happened

                        

                               Idk where my class is

                             & its starting in a few

You don't know where?? Bruh

Ask someone, im sure they'll help you

                              I did...but she didn't tell me

                                    which class it was😭 all.

she said was "down the hall"

BYEE LMAOO

Uhh

Just open the door you think it is😋       

                      UH- HUH🧏🏾‍♀️ YOU SETTING ME

                               UP FOR FAILURE.

     

       Imagine going into the wrong class and

                 all you see are eyes 👁👁

Girl, half of the people won't even see you again on campus👩🏻‍🏫

If you don't recognize the teacher, try to ask a student close to the door for direction

         Okay, im blaming you if I make a fool.    

                           outta myself 😟

                        Read at 8:43 am

(Play quicksand by SZA rq 👩🏾‍💻)

You decided to take your roomie's advice and pick a class, which you already did.

You dropped your phone back into your jacket pocket and swung open the door–you were prepared for the stares. The classroom was vacant, not even a teacher in sight. Just a bunch of stools and white pull down screens. You saw a few cameras standing in front of these screens. "Was this the photography class or sum?" You mumbled to yourself.

And well, eyes were on you but it wasn't a herd as you expected, just one. Sitting on one of the stools in front of the door, was pale skin boy with long brown hair. It rested at his shoulders, some of it covering his face even. He seemed around 6ft, or 6 ft 2? You couldn't really tell since he was sitting.

He had on some black jeans with a black long sleeve sweatshirt as well with a beige greenish short sleeve unbutton shirt rested on top of it– a long golden key necklace dangled from his chest. His hands were sitting between his lap, you noticed sliver rings on them.(his outfit for people who need help visualizing) The teal eyed boy was also rocking black & white air Jordan 1 retro, literally the same as you.

You screamed internally at how fine this man looked and he had shoe gang? Uggghh. Class been started and you were going to be late on your first because this OBVIOUSLY wasn't your class. You decided to break the awkward silence and speak,

"Hey, um, is this Mr. Fargos class?" You stepped more into the classroom for the brunette male to hear you.

"Wrong one, babe. His class is in a totally different building." A different building?! You wanted to die right there and then, especially after hearing him laugh after his statement. Not just the wrong class but the wrong building? Bye–you're so stupid. His eyes scanned your body, his eyes lingered a bit longer at your shoes–it seems he noticed. A smirk appeared on his lips after finishing his quick outfit interrogation–wait, did he just call you-? I-, yes he did. You tried your best to hide your smile and not react.

"O-ooo, I got it. Thanks" Eren released a small chuckled seeing your reaction, he could tell you were caught up with the little pet name.

"I'll walk you over there." He got off his stool and walked towards your direction.

"I-, nah it's good, I got it." You said in defense not wanting to bother him. He didn't respond and just passed by you, exiting the classroom. He held onto the door, looking at you.

"You coming or no?" He was so nonchalant with it everything. You smiled a bit and walked out the class alongside with him. He released his grip once you were out and started trialing behind you.

You paused for a moment because you didn't know where you were going. You turned back to look at him, he caught on and let out an "ah". He quickly got in front of you as you proceeded behind him.

"So," he said.

"What?" You replied. Why did he start a sentence and not finish it? Was he expecting you to start the conversation, weirdo. You just wanted to get to class l.

"Oo, sassy are we?" He raised a brow.

"What—? boy, say what you wanna say."

Once again, he let out a chuckle, flashing you a small. God, was his laugh attractive.

"You're into makeup and stuff?" He questioned.

"Yeah, I'm into 'makeup and stuff' " You said the last few words in the mocking tone, referring to what he called cosmology.

"That's good, at least I'll be seeing you often."

"Often? Oh, are you in that major also?" You said.

"No...Do you really not know anything?" He made you feel dumb by his response. How were you suppose to know what he meant? You clicked your teeth and started walking ahead. You pushed back the door that lead to another hallway and walked towards the end to push the second door that lead to another building.

The brunette boy watched as you left him behind in the dirt, waiting for the moment you'll turn the wrong corner—so he could tease you about it then correct you.

It wasn't too long till you reached your destination, you both stopped in front of the class's door.

"Well, see you. I hope you don't make snarky remarks to every girl you meet."

"Nah, only you princess." He had a smirk on his face, ooo! You wanted to wipe it off.

You glanced at him and his eyes were already on you, you broke eye contact and reached for the handle.

"Wait–" you whipped your heard back.

"Yeah?"

He cleared his throat

"Name's Eren," you let out a small giggle, did he really just stop you to say his name? Puhleasee. Hearing your laugh, his face brightened up and kept his eyes on you.

"Okay, Eren~. Thank you for walking me, I gotten get to class now."

You opened the door and stepped inside. Eren didn't even get a chance to ask your name. Luckily for him, your major mingled a lot with his own, he could only hope to see you again around campus.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Authors note: UGHHH, I STAYED UP ALL NIGHT FOR THIS just to pass out a few hours before school started. 🥲 I wasn't even paying attention in English and math class, but hope yall enjoyed <3.

Pt 3

#x reader #attack on titan #eren headcanons #eren x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager #anime #eren yeager x y/n #eren x black reader #eren yeager x you #aot x black reader #eren jeager #eren jaeger x reader #connie springer #aot season 4 #eren smut #fanfic #anime fanfic

[bumblebear30]

Oops

Rita Calhoun x Casey Novak, Established Calvak

A wee comfort fic for these two as I totally love them.

Warnings: mentions of Casey's office attack, migraine / mild medical concern. Side effects of getting older. No smut but alluded to. Happy ending.

Please let me know if you have any other prompts or requests for these two. Happy to try write more for them.

Oops

"You did it again."

The accusing tone made Casey's head snap up from where she was nestled on the couch. She could feel the light crust of dried drool on her cheek where she'd pretty much passed out into the pillow and rubbed at it with the cuff the sweater she was wearing in the hopes that her always immaculately dressed girlfriend wouldn't notice,

"Did what again?" she finally mumbled in response, a heavy pout in place as she scrunched her eyes against the bright light streaming in the apartment windows.

Rita sighed huffily as she perched on the back of the couch and busied herself with finishing taking off her earrings for the day. From there she finally caught sight of the sleep befuddled Casey - the creases of the pillow evidently pressed into her cheek, hair all mussed and cocooned in softest of old sweaters that Rita owned as the redhead obviously tried to drag her lagging brain through what it was she had done wrong this time.

Her expression immediately switched from frustration to concern as she reached out to card her fingers through Casey's hair, the younger woman automatically leaning into it and shifting closer to where Rita was sat,

"You left files that I shouldn't see on the breakfast bar again. We got a place with room for two separate offices for a reason darling."

Casey winced and opened one eye to finally look up at Rita as she apologised,

"Oops, m'sorry babe, I genuinely didn't mean to. I just needed different light. "

Rita tilted her head and gave a small sympathic noise as Casey burrowed her head against the back of the couch,

"Migraine again sweetheart?" Casey nodded groggily where she lay, loathe to commit to any movements that required further effort. Seeing her so forlorn pulled at Rita's heartstrings and she quickly got up and shed her shoes and jacket onto a nearby chair as she came round to the front of the couch to join Casey, "That's the third bad one this month..."

Hearing the familiar sound of Rita settling next to her Casey shifted to lay her head in her girlfriend's lap, wordlessly requesting for the attorney's always slightly cool hand to run across her forehead and circle at her temple as she'd done before by simply tipping her chin just so.

Of course Rita automatically took up the action, also using her free hand to run her nails in soothing circles across Casey's lower back.

The redhead let herself just bask in the attention and comfort. She'd felt instantly a bit better as soon as the scent of Rita's expensive perfume had reached her - always accompanied by the faint smell of coffee, ink and paper, a lawyerly smell if ever there was such a thing. That and the almost pavlovian way her body responded to Rita's touch, practically commanding her to relax with the lightest of pressures, also helped ease the residual pulsating ache at the front of her brain.

Afterwards she'd been sulky for days, which had drawn further unimpressed looks and rolled eyes from Rita. Eventually she'd pulled her head out of her ass and apologised with a gorgeous bouquet and an evening of pampering - cooking Rita's favourites for dinner, making the effort to use the good china and having candles on the table followed by a super indulgent bubble bath for the brunette (the rose petals may have been overboard but she knew Rita secretly adored them.)

She knew where Rita's comment was leading though. They'd had this argument discussion the last time too and she was not wanting a repeat of that general fiasco and to ultimately wallow in her own grumpiness yet again. It was worse because she knew Rita was right, and was only concerned and fussing simply because she loved her. But she had still been in residual pain and exhaustion from the migraine in question as well as licking her wounds from losing the most recent case to her lover too.

All that had only been a week ago, meaning it was less than fourteen days since she'd last had to abandon her work to lie in a darkened room with a cold compress across her eyes and an ice pack wrapped up at the base of her neck. It wasn't sustainable, and she hated being sick all the more because she knew Rita was always more worried than she let on.

She sighed lightly and wriggled her head back so she was pressed more closely into Rita's ridiculously soft silk blouse. The brunette had lifted her hands away as Casey moved but seeing her settle let them resume the gentle caresses. Noting that Casey hadn't immediately started arguing with her Rita decided to press her case once more,

"I just think given that you have such a bad head injury in your past, " Casey couldn't suppress the fearful shiver that ran down her spine at the memories - and lack of them - of her office attack, "that it would be sensible to get a doctor to run some tests and check what is going on."

At still receiving no response from Casey Rita tried to push just that little bit more. She gently ran a finger down the elegant slope of Casey's nose, booping the tip of it which made Casey start and turn onto her back to smile softly up at Rita. Holding her gaze Rita matched her with an indulgent look as she tucked some hair back behind Casey's ear,

"It's just that I'm rather fond of that brain of yours sweetheart, I'd hate to think anything might be wrong." She finished her plea by cupping Casey's chin and running the pad of her thumb over her lips as their positioning meant she couldn't reach to kiss them.

Once again Casey closed her eyes and leaned into the touch,

"And here I thought you were with me for my 'cracking bod', " she grinned as she felt Rita's entire body move as she laughed, "But I know. You're right. As usual." Her admission made Rita smile in victory, Casey's quip pulling another knowing chuckle that rumbled through her,

"Good, I have the number of an excellent neurologist, I'm sure he'll be able to see you by the end of the week."

Casey shot her a look that screamed incredulity,

"He wasn't a client was he? I'm not sure how comfortable I would be with that."

The experienced attorney did laugh at that,

"No, no," she continued to play with Casey's hair, "although he has maybe been an expert witness on several occasions but he's only ever been the utmost professional." she paused for a moment as Casey considered her options. "So what do you say darling, let me call and set up an appointment for you?"

With one last resigned sigh Casey nodded,

"Okay," honestly she was prepared to go through nearly anything if she could stop feeling so accutely crappy whenever these migraines came along, or stop them from happening in the first place.

"But," the smallness of her voice and demeanour, so unlike the usual strong confident persona of the prosecutor, brought out Rita's overprotective side even more, "But what if there is something wrong? Like-"

Deciding to quickly end any spiralling Rita pressed her finger over Casey's lip to hush her,

"Shh, then its better to know and we'll deal with whatever it may be together as best we can."

Suitably mollified, Casey rolled once more so her nose was buried against Rita's stomach, so much so her voice was muffled when she finally spoke,

"I'm sorry, I'm just worried."

"I know darling, but it may just be that you need glasses or something like that now, you know?"

The scandalised and affronted noise that escaped Casey made Rita laugh once again,

"I've always thought you'd look very sexy in glasses you know..."

The low purr of her voice drew an instant reaction from Casey, it always did. Like a siren's call she opened her eyes, feeling better enough to shoot a flirtatious look up at her love as she arched her eyebrow as seductively as she could manage in her prone position,

"Is that so?"

"Hmm hmm," Rita's affirmative humm came as she matched Casey's expression with one of her own, "You could totally pull off the sexy librarian look darling."

"Librarian!?!"

In her offense Casey finally sat up to lightly glare at Rita on a more equal footing. She lightly trailed her hand up Rita's thigh, so overly unsubtle Rita knew she was just winding her up. Still she enjoyed the attention nonetheless. "What if I wanted to go for the sexy lawyer in glasses look? Could I pull that one off too?"

Rita tipped her head to the side as she squinted at Casey, umming and awwing for extra effect,

"I'm sorry love but I think Cabot has got that niche locked down tight."

Casey couldn't help but gasp at the teasing and swat at Rita's thigh in retribution,

"Rude!"

Rita kept cackling with laughter, simply relieved to see Casey's usual firey playfulness was returning,

"Well if you get glasses you can work extra hard to prove me wrong, no?"

With a knowing smile Casey leant forward to press an adoring but chaste kiss to Rita's lips,

"Sounds good to me, thank you for helping me feel better."

Reaching up Rita cupped Casey's chin and drew her face back to her for another kiss. Or two. Maybe three. She just loved how they felt against her own.

"I'm glad I could help. Now do you want to go lock those files away whilst I give the doctor a call? We can then get an order from Chengs if you'd like?"

Casey was already making the effort to stand, holding herself still for several moments to ensure her balance was set after feeling so woozy earlier. Finding herself steady she smiled at Rita once more as she started heading for the kitchen,

"As long as there is lo mein I don't mind!"

A couple of days later Rita answered her ringing cell automatically, not even looking away from her inbox as she barked her usual response,

"Calhoun, who's speaking."

"Hey sweet thing," instantly Rita's entire posture melted, Casey's voice and determination to use ridiculous pet names totally always got her,

"Darling, how'd the appointment go." she'd swung her chair away from the computer screen, her entire focus now on Casey,

"Well you were right."

"I usually am, remind me what I was right about this time?"

"Scans and everything came back clear but I've got glasses to wear now... " Casey paused long enough for Rita to both sigh in relief and laugh,

"Oh is that all?"

"Well, he advised I change to a different type fo light bulb where possible, and definitely to wear glasses when looking at screens as they'll filter that blue light thing? But that and some proper rest and it should all help."

"That's great news sweetheart, I'm so relieved." Truly Rita felt like a knot she hadn't known was there had been released in her chest,

"Yeah, so in the spirit of medical necessity, I think we should schedule a trip up to the house in the Hampton's." Sometimes Casey still would catch herself after saying such a thing. A house in the Hampton's. Their house in the Hamptons. Quite ridiculous.

Rita chuckled but instantly swept round to open their shared calendar to look for potential timings,

"An excellent idea darling, I could even ask Danielle to get the boat ready for us? I know you love to play at being Captain."

"Please, you just want to lounge about in your bikini in front of me don't you."

"Well with your new glasses we'll have to test how much better you can see me. I do love putting on a show for you."

The flirtation made Casey gulp, images of Rita enjoying herself nearly overwhelming her,

"You always do have the best ideas, I propose we do lots of testing."

"For medical necessity?" Rita's smirk was clear even though Casey couldn't see her face,

"Exactly, you always know how to take the best care of me baby..."

#Fanfic #My writing #Rita Calhoun #Casey Novak #Rita Calhoun X Casey Novak #Calvak

[dizzyingdaze]

no seats | s.r

a scenario where you can't keep your mouth shut and steve rogers wouldn't want it any other way.

only warning is cursing

New York was somewhere you never thought you'd visit let alone live in, yet here you were. Clutching the bag of your friends coat as she shuffled her way into the busy cafe during lunch time, the worst time to be in any cafe in the city.

Women in pencil skirts exchanged pleasantries with men in dark suits, briefcases occasionally knocking off the guitar case lain against one of the long sofas a group of teenagers occupied.

The jazzy playlist was overtaken by the loud chatter of the customers, the scent of fresh toasted panini's and cinnamon buns intermingling with the raw coffee bean tones. It was chaos to be short if the screaming baby who knocked over their babysitters iced coffee, smack in the middle of the bustling building, was any indication.

Hearing a hefty sigh pass your side, a young worker grabbed a mop and placed down a wet floor sign, shooing anybody standing nearby away.

"Oh no, we're not going to get any seats I think," your friend Karolina said to you, eyeing the usual window seats taken filled up completely.

You signed in response as the line waddled forward, names being shouted out as you continued to eye all tables, eager to jump at any tables with packing bags and empty drinks.

"I'm going to shoot upstairs and check, get me a mocha?," She nodded her head in reply as you broke away from the impatient grumbles and weaved through the tables.

As you neared the end of the stairs, accidentally kicking an empty cup on the floor, you eyed a girl sitting by herself, nestled in the of the window sets. Her bag sat on one chair while an empty one sat across from her.

Eyes widening with an idea you began to walk towards her when a couple beat you there. An almost six foot boy placed his hands down on the table, garnering the attention of the lone girl.

"My girl and I need somewhere to sit and I see your cup is nearly empty. Mind moving? Thanks," He bared his teeth at her in an almost smile, the annoyed crease between his blonde brows giving him away.

His girlfriend seemed less than interested, typing out a message on her phone, only glancing up when the girl opened her mouth.

"Actually I'm waiting on somebody as I'm meant to be tutoring, I don't mind giving you one of the seats though?" She gave a watery smile, her hands beginning to slowly shake at his direct nature.

He downright glared at her response, leaning further into his hands until his face was an inch away from hers. "I was being courteous, now I'm annoyed. Move it,"

Her face flushed red at the embarrassment as his girlfriend began to giggle behind him, clearly used to his egotistical nature. Your own face flushed too but rather in anger, just who the fuck is this dick ordering around random girls?

What a huff you strode up to till you stood between the two, pushing him back with your hand you glared harshly at him as a "What the fuck?" escaped his lips.

'What the fuck yourself, who are you to tell this girl to move? Everybody here wants a seat to yet you don't seem them acting like a little child," You spat watching his neck go red at the confrontation, clearly not used to it.

He stumbled for a second finding words before shooting back "I can tell whoever I want to move especially if she's been sitting there with an empty coffee cup. I don't have to listen to any bitch trying to boss me around!" The cafe had gone quiet as he shouted out the last sentence, Karolina looking on surprised, the drinks held in her hand. She moved forward to pull you away from the scene but you didn't even budge.

"Oh I'm the bitch? That's rich coming from a dickhead picking on somebody smaller than him, tell me, do you always start throwing tantrums when you don't get what you want? Like a child?," Hearing you call him a child again seem to strike a chord in him.

His girlfriend moved to pull him back as his hand balled in a fist, Karolina whispered to you "Not again, let's go please," into your ear. But you both shared the same stubborn nature, refusing to move.

The tension rose as you just stared each other down, veins almost bulging, jaws clenched so tight they began to ache. The man pointed his finger right in your face, the thought of biting it ran through your mind. "You do not tell me what to do and I'm not a fucking child you hear me? You better learn to keep your sharp tongue to yourself and out of my goddamn affairs!" His attention shifted to the girl he had originally spoken to, her eyes beginning to tear up as he moved the finger from you to her.

Pushing him back again, outraged at the audacity he had to even speak to her again you pushed him back full force with both your hands, grounding your boots into the sticky floor. Taken aback he stumbled into his girlfriend and you swore you could see his pride take a physical hit.

Without missing a beat he rolled his shoulders and balled his fists and you did the same before two large figures stepped between you two.

"Easy there tough guy, hitting a dame the best way to win a fight you shouldn't have started?" The voice wasn't familiar but the metal fingers peeking out of the black denim jacket was, clutching the boys shoulder so hard he bent forward at it. "Let me go what the fuck-" He started before the stranger grabbed the back of his lettermen jacket and dragged him out of the shop through the back exit, the girlfriend shouting along with him as she followed them out.

The second man had bent down in front of the girl in the middle of this all, her shoulders shaking as the man whispered soothingly to her. You coughed awkwardly uncurling your fists, clocking all the eyes on you and your friend just deadpanned at you. "Don't you even try, why does your ass always have to get in the middle of other peoples business? I said, don't start!" She placed a finger over your lips as you obediently went quiet.

You could always explain later. You turned to face the man and the girl, to see how she was when you recognized who he really was. Light blue eyes stared into yours as you took in the broad shoulders and blonde hair peeking out from under his cap. You just blinked in surprise but said nothing, choosing to crouch in front of the girl who was no longer shaking.

"Are you alright?" She nodded, thanking you as she bent forward for a hug you gladly returned, albeit a bit quickly because there was so many people here. "I probably would have moved and most likely cried in the bathroom so you know, thanks for that," You grinned at her response, standing up as Karolina threw her free hand up.

"If you're not outside in the next five minutes i'm throwing your drink down the drain," She stalked out, blonde ponytail bouncing behind her as the onlookers resumed their previous activities, leaving you standing rather stiffly in front of Captain fucking America.

"I take it from your friend being annoyed, you do that thing a lot?" His lips curling up as you nodded shortly. "She's not actually annoyed at me, she'd be more annoyed if I let that twat continue to shout at her and do nothing," He chuckled at that, stuffing his hands into his jacket pocket as you stared at the door your friend left.

"Well don't let me hold you back but hey, Captain America approves of your social justicing! Or in the name of social justice? You get what I mean," His cheeks blushed a light pink as you giggled at his roundabout way of complimenting you.

"Yeah I'll say that next time it happens. Nice to know an Avenger approves! I'd better go..." You trailed off as he stepped to the side and sent a curt salute your way.

As he watched you saunter away Bucky, who re entered the shop from the entrance, clapped a hand on his shoulder, sighing lowly. "She reminds me of you in some weird, female way, hopefully she doesn't end up in back-alley brawls" He commented, Steve scoffed as they made their way back to the two seater in the corner of the cafe, drinks now a gross lukewarm temperature.

"Please, did you hear her? Her words alone could get a guy bleeding internally," The words slipped out and Bucky whistled at them. "Didn't know all it took was some curse words and authority to get you mushy. Yet, Natasha is a poster child for it and you couldn't care less," Bucky grimaced after sipping his hot chocolate, the once sweet warm mixture now cold and slimy on his tongue.

The other soldier slowly circled the rim of his latte, thinking of how fast you stood up to him, pointing your finger up in his face. "Nat sticks up to assholes 'cause it's her job but she did it for the sake of it. Excuse me, I am not mushy!" He sent a quick dig to his friends shin the offended's brows furrowed at the sharp pain.

"Oh yeah? You're wearing the same damn look you did when Peggy came into the pub all those nights ago. Bet you even tried to find her name on those coffee cups the blonde had," Rubbing the attacked body part, Bucky snidely remarked.

Steve said nothing in response, choosing to stare out the window next to him. He was right, your quickly scribbled name was engraved in his mind as was the white ford fiesta you had hopped in a few meters down from the cafe. Not that he was looking, of course, it was mere coincidence his eyes never seemed to leave your figure.

Mere coincidence, he thought to himself as Bucky rolled his eyes at his friends behaviour. He wondered what weird excuse Steve was going to give for the rest of the week or month it would take to run into you again.

#steve rogers #captain america #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #marvel imagine

[nerdycanible1]

The Healing Plant.

This is a story of Kya's and Lin's past. Of who gave Kya her betrothal necklace and why Lin has issues. This is my own little story so of course I will not have the facts lol. Also please be warned as this has some explicit content of fire and burns. Along with death. Please don't read if you are sensitive to such things. Please enjoy.

All art is mine.

Lin squeezed her pillow as a tear glided down her cheek. "Her last breath will always haunt my dreams. The echoes of her breath bounce around in my head and I cannot rid of it." Her lip trembled. "How can you forgive me?" She whispered. "I lost the only person dear to you." She whimpered. "I failed you."

Kya looked at Lin with a wince as her heart was still numb. Losing her wife only a few days ago didn't make her feel right. Her hand clenched as the water near them began to freeze. The betrothal necklace around her neck felt as if a million pounds of anvils were on her chest. Lin couldn't save her. Lin couldn't save the only person she has ever cared about. The only soul mate.

Lin was wrapped in bandages as her burn wounds was still raw, tender and still needed a lot of healing. Her hair was disheveled as tears glided down her face, her eyes puffy. Why does she get to cry? Not like she's the one that lost a lover.

"You did fail." Kya says barely above a whisper, clenching her fists. The bright smile Zhi always seemed to save for her. the tender kisses and the affectionate laugh that always made her join in. "How can you let her get hurt?!"

Lin flinched and whimpered. She began to push herself up and winced. "Kya let me explain what h-"

"No!!! Zhi Ruo is gone because of you!! You let her get hurt... you let her die! You let my wife die!!" Lin sniffled and covered her face ashamed. "I thought you were a protector of civilians. Of everyone." The water in the pans, bowls and cups trembled as Kya was getting more and more angry. Her grief getting the best of her.

Lin had no idea Zhi was Kya's wife. She didn't know. She tried to save her but instead she let the woman get killed. Be my wife Kya. I'll always be there for you.

Kya growled as she raised the water above her head ready to hurt Lin. Lin squeezed her eyes shut ready to for the pain but it never came. Instead she felt the ice water plop onto her as she saw Kya's retreating form leave the room.

[11 Years Later]

Lin sat in her apartment drinking her bitter coffee. it was already 3 in the morning and Lin was wearing her tank top. Tenzin breaking up with her after 13 years and Kya never seeing her was a harsh world to be in. Lin was a bitter woman, being the age of 39 and no suiters was not a way to go. Her finger subconsciously running over her burned flesh. The scars were permanent and she still felt the death of Zhi pretty hard. Kya still hasn't forgiven her and it only dawned to her that she may never see the woman again.

She was just finishing her last cup of the night before there was a tentative knock on her front door. She frowned as she looked up at the clock and saw that it was 3:47 am. She stood up with a sigh and stomped her way to the door and opened it up. "What do you wa-" Her words dying in her throat when seeing the waterbender. Lin went rigid when she heard the others words bounce in her head. Your fault! Your FAULT. Kya looked up at Lin with a smile but only furrowed her brows seeing the bad fire wounds on Lin and the look upon her face. "Lin, spirits you chan-"

Lin let out a strained sob and slammed the door in front of her, leaving the waterbender on her porch. Lin stumbled back and her hands trembled as her arm began to burn. "Lin are you okay? Linnie?"

Lin held onto her arm and cursed under her breath. The hurried knocks from Kya was agitating her along with her arm. Her heart ached at the memory. She wanted to explain herself to Kya about the whole situation but all she got was the sad stares from the family. Kya had packed up in the middle of the night and no one knew where she went. Lin growled and walked to the door. She stood up and held her chest up and swung the door open. Kya almost fell forward but began to gather her balance. "Lin-" she breathed in relief but Lin crossed her arms over her chest.

"What is it?" She snapped. Kya flinched hearing the harshness of the of Lin's words. The last time they talked, Lin was goofy and had kinder words. Kya frowned as she gulped and looked at her. "Can I com-"

"No you may not. State your business so I can head to bed. I have a early shift in the morning. Now what is it?"

Kya frowned and looked up at the other as her brows furrowed. "We need to talk. I thought you'd want to see me after I came back." Her heart ached. Just what had happened to her best friend. Lin always had time for her.

"Came back?" She barked. "How long ago was it you were gone? How many letters did you write? How many years?" Lin glared down at the woman and kept her arm from view the best she could. The burn mark was from the mid of her forearm all the up to the mid way of her neck. I burned part of her back and her stomach.

Kya felt her brows draw down as her eyes watered. "I would have... I thought we were over this. Lin that was, I was still a k-"

"Save it. I don't need your words of pity. If there's nothing else then let me head back to sleep." How can I get over it when your words haunt my dreams. The tears and the hate in your eyes. "Lin wa-" Lin didn't give her another chance as she slammed the door in her face.

{TIME SKIP}

It was a few days later before Lin was heading to the island to talk to Katara and Aang. The kids and her may have gotten on the wrong foot but that doesn't mean her and her aunty and uncle were on the bad foot. And she also promised to help them build a new set of stairs to help be easier to go up to the temple. She also wanted to catch up with Bumi till he was deployed again. The two were an unlikely pair but they became really close and were practically best friends.

Once Lin arrived she was greeted by the same acolytes that always greet her. She began to make her way up the make shift stairs and jog up them as she wanted to greet Katara before she got to work. Once she made it to the house she opened the door and ran right into the Waterbender. Lin grunted as she stumbled back and she looked up and was ready to apologize to Katara for running into her until she saw who it was and she stayed quiet. Kya and her were in a stare down before an arm hooked around her shoulders and she was pulled into Bumi's side. Lin groaned as she began to pull herself away from Bumi. "BUMI!!!" She growled as he would chuckle and hold her in his arms.

Kya frowned seeing the two act so familiar to each other. Lin wasn't like that with her. Lin punched him in the gut and he huffed and bent forward with a obnoxious laugh. "Your punch is the same." He grunted.

Lin chuckled and stood there watching as Bumi tried to regain his breath.

Lin chuckled tapped the others shoulder. "As much as I like beating you up Bumi I wanna say hi to your mother." Bumi smiled at Lin and followed after her as if he hadn't got his guts mushed. "Mom made some apple tarts and breakfast."

Lin could feel the others icy glare though she ignored it. She didn't want to talk to her. Her burn was irritating her again, it seemed to always burn around the bad memories and now Kya. Lin was wearing a long sleeved shirt that was a little too hot to wear during the summer but it looked as if it didn't bother Lin.

Once inside Lin greeted her uncle and aunty and hugged them both, though it be a one sided hug it didn't mean any less than love.

Lin listened to them talk while Bumi hung back with Kya. "What's wrong with the both of you? Lin used to always greet you first?" He looked down at his little sister and Kya rolled her eyes.

"Things change Bumi. It's been years since the last we saw each other." Kya muttered as she looked at the police chief. Lin laughed with them and stole a apple tart. Lin always loved sweets and always was spoiled whenever she came over.

"Can you get me some water Lin, I wanna make some tea to go with this." Katara said holding a bowl out to her. Lin smiled and finished swallowing her food before she grabbed the bowl.

"Of course." She began to walk out of the house and Katara made sure the other left the door before Katara threw a spoon at Kya, hitting her squarely on the forehead.

"You were supposed to talk to Lin last night!!" She grumbled. She began to walk towards her. "Why didn't you two talk?!"

Bumi started laughing loudly and holding his stomach as he did so. Kya rubbed her forehead and pouted towards her mother. "Mom let me explain. She slammed the door in my face." Katara glared at her and placed her hands on her hips.

"That shouldn't stop you. You're a master waterbender and you let a door stop you? When I was your age-no younger than you I sliced through a wooden cage with only my sweat. And you let a door stop you." Katara shook her head and went back to cooking. "Now go out there and set it straight." Aang gave his daughter a sympathetic look.

Kya chewed the inside if her cheek before she sighed and walked outside. Leaving Bumi's boisterous laugh inside and went to the well.

Lin grunted as she looked down in the well saw the water. She frowned as she saw the bucket down in the water without the rope tied around it. With a heavy sigh Lin began to crawl inside the well and braced herself against the wall. She began to slowly make her way down into the dark well. "Lin? Lin?" Kya began to look around for the woman and frowned not seeing her. Lin had just grabbed the bucket while she was trying to keep her balance against the wells walls.

With one last look around her grabbed a bucket and used her bending to bring water out of the well. A yelp left the well as Lin got soaked in the ice water and a loud splash was heard as Lin fell into the water. The Well wall wasn't structured properly and the rocks were loose.

Kya dropped the water and ran to the well seeing Lin at the bottom. Lin was floating in the water and Lin was glaring daggers at Kya. "Spirits Lin. You ok-"

Lin grunted and grabbed the wall of the well before she began to earthbend her wait up. Her clothes were all soaked. "Here let me help y-"

Lin swatted her hands away as she crawled out of the well with a huff and stood there letting the water drip off of her. "I'm fine." She knew it was her fault but that didn't mean she wasn't mad. With a heavy sigh, Lin unbuttoned her shirt and pulled it off. Lin was wearing nothing but the wraps around her chest. Lin was muttering sweet words under her breath as she began to take her shoes off.

Kya's eyes raked over her body and brows furrowed. She had no idea how Lin could stand the scars. It must have hurt her so badly. Her fingers subconsciously ran over the wrinkled scars. Lin tensed and went rigid, her body had froze and trembled.

"Zhi!! This is no time for you to act like a hero!! Kya can care for herself!" Lin grasped her arm and began to pull her out of the temple. The smoke was building up in the room, the logs blazing with fire were coming down.

It was only supposed to be a damn house fire but the team got split up and were each ambushed and attacked. Zhi fought against Lin's grip and shoved Lin away. "Shes in trouble! I can feel it!" Lin growled as she grabbed her hand again but Zhi slapped Lin across the face and pointed upwards. Kya was being choked while the man was ready to stab her.

With the burning, stinging sensation on her cheek Lin was ready to slap the other.

The smoke was filling Lin's lungs and she could barely breath. With a quick flick of her arm a rock flew towards the man. Lin didn't see the non bender run off and she continued to distract him from the first floor.

A scream rang in her ears and just like in slow motion she saw the pillar give way and was slowly falling to the ground. Her heart ached as she had to make a hard decision. She knew Kya can care for herself and a second later Lin was using her metal from her suit to hold the pillar up along with her right arm. It felt as if hot boiling, blistering water was being poured on the right side of her body.

A blood curdling scream left Lin's lips as she held the pillar up. She soon saw Zhi under her. The woman looked as white as a ghost but she was still breathing. But what wasn't right was the blood pooling around her. Her breath was shallow and had a small wheeze to it.

Part of the pillar was broken and stabbed the other in the stomach. Even if she did manage to get out from under the wood, the burn Mark's and huge hole in her stomach wouldn't let her live.

Tears filled her eyes as she was losing a friend and there was nothing she could do. With the fire on her skin, cooking her alive she felt as if she was gonna pass out at any given moment.

She clenched her jaw, her breathing getting shallower and shallower. Lin took a deep breath and she clenched her jaw. With all her remaining strength she pushed herself to her feet and lifted the pillar as high as she could. She needed to get her out of here. She couldnt burn in here. With another growl she threw the pillow behind her and lifted the woman in her arms. Her skin felt as if it was melting away.

Shakey, jello-y legs began to carry the woman out. Tears gliding down her cheeks as she could see the light of the door way. The body in her arms slowly getting colder and colder. Her heart barely beating.

"Stay alive. Stay alive. Stay alive." Lin chanted over and over. "Stay awake." Her sight was growing dimmer and dimmer.

"Tell... Kya I love her." She wheezed. Lin had laid the other a good few feet away from the collapsing house. She smiled and brought her hand up to her cheek. Tears filled her eyes as she stared into Lin's eyes. "Take care of her."

Lin shook her head and clenched onto her hand with trembling fingers. Her hand couldn't even give her strength. "Y-You have to do that. Please. Z-Zhi... please."

Zhi gave her a lightlsmile and caressed her cheek but her strength gave out and her hand dropped. Her head began to lean to the side and her breathing was all she heard. Lin held her hand and stroked it. She couldn't heal her. The least she could do was be there in her last moments. With one last ragged, deep breath she was gone. Lin squeezed her hand as she was losing her best friend. Her tears dropping on her arm.

Lin smacked her hand away and glared at her. "Don't touch me." She didn't yell it, she didn't squeeze her hand. She didn't do anything except utter the words.

But Kya felt all the emotions hit her hard. Feeling her aura felt as if she were in the saddest place on the world. Kya stumbled back and tears filled her eyes.

Lin stared at the other and watched her step back. Her hand pressed against her forearm, feeling the ugly burn marks. "What happened? I-It couldn't have been that bad." Kya breathed as she seemed to have regained herself.

Lin felt her lip raise to a scowl and she grasped the other by the front of her dress and pulled her close. She stared up into her eyes, not even caring for the obvious height difference. "Not that bad? NOT THAT BAD?!" Lin growled as she felt her grip tighten, her fingers going white, the joints in her fingers screamed under the pressure.

"Maybe if you didn't run off in the middle of the night then you would have known what actually happened." She barked. She began to walk forward and Kya took and alternating one back.

"L-Lin."she grimaced as she was shoved back. The little push wouldn't have hurt but the strong fingers of Lin Beifong was no joke. "I was just a kid. I-I just had lost my wife. I-I was hurting." Kya defended herself.

Lin's eyes blazed, the ground beneath them trembled. "Just a kid?" She clenched her jaw and glared at her. "I was a kid too!" She growled. "She was my best friend!" She snapped. The rumble of the Beifong's anger made the stone split. "I... I watched her die." The rumbling suddenly stopped and the broken Beifong stood there. "We were friends before you were her wife." She whispered. "I knew her before you."

Lin took a deep breath and finally looked into her eyes. "It was my fault she died I know t-that." Her voice cracked and she ran a hand over her scars, her nails digging into the scar. The sight made Kya wince.

"I just.... the pillar fell... I ran as fast, as I could." She felt the tear run down her cheek. "She loved you." She whispered. Lin's heart ached as she hung her head and hid her pained face. "She said... she loved you... I-I." She gulped and squeezed her eyes shut. But not me. She didn't... she didnt love me. "How can I let her die. I held the pillar... I made sure it didn't crush her..."

Lin's gut twisted and she turned and looked out to the waterview. "Her last breath hangs in my head, her bright amber eyes are forever burned in my mind."

"Lin I'm so sorry." Kya whispered. She walked over to the other but Lin stepped back. "Lin." She grabbed her by the hand and Lin took a shuttering breath.

"Zhi died. The pillar I held up was on fire, the fire burned so badly and I couldn't even hold it up." Lin looked up at Kya with furrowed brows. "I've never seen someone hate me so much." She gulped and gripped her hand. "For the first time in my life, I saw someone hate me so much you were willing to kill me."

Kya opened her mouth the say something but Lin shut her up with a look. She didn't want Kya to speak. Not at all.

"I know I should've protected her but... it hurt so much." She looked into Kya's eyes and her brows twitched together every now and then. "Why did you blame me for her death?" She whispered. "She was a grown woman and... and she made her own decisions." She glared at Kya before she sighed and just let her emotions fall into a numb impassive face.

"I'm tired of this Kya." She stepped back and rubbed her shoulder. Kya grabbed her and pulled her into a hug.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't think my words would hurt you this bad." She closed her eyes and pulled her in close. "I'm so sorry."

All Lin could do was stand there. She made no move to hug her back, her mind wondered back to the temple. Every night she relived the same dream. With the smell of burnt hair, the smell of flesh and the small hint of blood.

The smell never left Lin's nose, she always smelled and tasted the fire.

#nerds #art #queer artist #atla #legendofkorra #lesbian #lgbtq #lin beifong #kya ll #legend of korra kya #heart break #fanfic

[hesesols]

The Devil's Advocate

Day 19 and 21 of Ichiruki month 2020

Summary: Demons are a pain in the neck. Exhibit A: The pint-sized she-demon Ichigo’s stuck with until further notice.

Rating: T

FF/ao3

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His mouth is bone dry.

Summer heat renders the humidity inside the tiny studio apartment stifling. Heat and sweat cling onto him like a second skin and the stupid electric fan does nothing to ease it.

It's barely three in the morning when he trudges over to his fridge and parks himself in front of the open doors. The blast of cold air hits his heated body nicely. He almost moans.

Instinctively, he grabs the bottle of orange juice from the side and takes a swig from it- only… it's empty?

He growls, "Rukia, what did we say about leaving the empty OJ in the fridge?"

The culprit spares him a lazy smirk from her end of the couch, violet cat-eyes gleaming from the faint glow of the TV. She tilts her head just so as she sticks her tongue out at him.

"Oops!"

Ichigo wearily sighs and slams the door shut, mumbling something about free-loading she-demons. His life is hardly picture perfect to begin with anyway with his job at the Metropolitan Police as a homicide detective. Work hours are long, and his mornings usually start off with unsolicited gruesome crime scene photos and a diluted concoction of coffee-water that is nowhere nearly as strong as he needs it to be.

Since Rukia moved in though, things seem to have gone from bad to worse.

His neighbours think she's his live-in girlfriend- sweet, albeit a little strange at times. Ichigo snorts. They don't know half of it.

The midget isn't even human.

Underneath a heavy layer of glamour, are two spiral-shaped horns- the colour of it blending near seamless with her nest of glossy black hair and of course, a very noticeable fork-tipped tail, flicking from side to side as she giggles at his obvious annoyance at the OJ-less situation.

Filling his cup with lukewarm tap water instead, he trudges over and nudges at her to move. Wordlessly settling next to her, he then proceeds to ignore her indignant yelp as he splays his long legs on the couch, taking up much of her space.

She huffs and glares at him, which earns her a careless roll of his eyes.

"What are you watching?"

Squinting slightly from the brightness, he scoffs as he realizes that she's watching a Spanish telenovela. Though watching may be an understatement in this case, Rukia is obsessed with them to the point where she becomes a little too invested in the torrid love affairs of the fictional characters on screen. By virtue of her otherworldly origins, she understands every language known to man and speaks in tongues; Ichigo doesn't and thinks it's a feat that he catches the names of the characters in passing.

He grabs the remote control, surprised when she viciously slaps his hand away and hisses, "Change the channel and I guarantee you won't live long enough to see the next dawn."

"I'd like to see you try."

Ichigo snorts and does it anyway. It's hard to take her seriously even with the whole glowing eyes business when she is so tiny that she barely comes to his shoulder.

As a demon, Rukia is surprisingly low maintenance- the most outrageous of her demands since she has gotten herself suspended in limbo in their plane of existence was for him to take her to a bunny café. That being said, she does however take her soaps and TV shows very seriously which explains her aggressiveness as she launches herself at him, her touch burning hot on naked skin as she grapples for the device.

"Give it back!"

Ichigo stretches, holding it in one hand just shy of her reach, taunting her.

"Why don't you make me, midget?"

Growling, she takes him up on his challenge. Violet eyes ablaze as she clambers over him on all four, chewing at her lower lip from the effort. It shouldn't even be possible Ichigo thinks, for demons to be this cute- ahem-fixated with earthly distractions but the press of her lithe body feels warm against him, deluding him into thinking for a second, that Rukia isn't some supernatural being from the nether realms powerful enough to send him flying with a snap of her fingers.

Sometimes, he feels she almost forgets about her inhuman advantages- on purpose. The puff of warm exhale from her makes his hair stand, the sight of her face so close to his jerks his thoughts away from his nonsensical musings. Her shirt hikes up and the collar that is way too loose on her easily falls off her shoulder, showing skin.

He bites the inside of his cheek. She needs to stop prancing around in his shirts.

She has her own clothes to wear. He bought her a full array of sundresses, pants, shirts and skirts. Ichigo thinks it's compulsion that makes her raid his closet and steal his clothes. It wouldn't have been quite so ridiculous if she wasn't so petite, making his worn-in T-shirts look more like dresses with the hem cut conspicuously shorter than normal on her thighs.

Ichigo looks away and takes a quick gulp of water. The heat is doing things to him.

He's not checking her out.

He swears. Honest to God.

He's not suicidal. He wouldn't put it above Rukia to claw his eyes out or alternatively damn him to the deepest pits of purgatories if she found out about him sneaking glances at her.

"Here!"

Ichigo throws the remote back at her, standing up abruptly without sparing her another glance. His skin feels warm- much warmer than it has any business of being under a demon's touch and his mouth dry. No touch of water will ever begin to quench this thirst and tame his racing heart but he is human enough to still try to run from the implications.

It's too hot to think. He grabs his keys and wallet.

"I'm heading out."

Rukia's voice rings up from the couch- cool, unaffected as always. Ichigo hates her a little for it, almost.

"This time of the day? Where are you going?"

"To get some OJ from the corner shop since someone finished it and couldn't even be bothered enough to replace it."

Her grin is impish, not a shred of remorse from her as she sighs and kicks back, reclaiming her sovereignty over the couch.

"Oh, could you grab some ice-cream while you're at it? I think we're all out too."

He grimaces, halts his process of shrugging on a shirt to yell back, "They're full of sugary crap. Too much of it and you're going to rot your teeth!"

Just before he sets foot outside though, he grumbles.

"What flavour do you want?"

The grin she flashes at him is annoying and indolent with her spread out on the couch, like a cat in the sun, pleased with her unchallenged access to her favourite soap and him running errands on her behalf.

The satisfaction practically purrs from her as she smirks and says, "Strawberries and cream."

His cheeks burn and he tells himself that he's too nice for his own good, staunchly refusing to even consider the possibility that she's got him wrapped around her pretty little fingers.

.

.

.

The streets of his neighbourhood are mostly deserted in the wee hours before dawn and the scarcity of people makes the air somewhat bearable despite the heat. He walks home in the dark, his groceries in a plastic bag hanging limply by his side.

Ichigo sighs. It's a horrible thing to be distracted by thoughts and downright disgraceful that it has taken him this long to realize that he's being followed.

He turns the next corner sharply and as expected, the heavy footsteps, the crunch against the gravel of the pavement follows. He hides behind the decrepit wall, bidding his time until the sound creeps close enough for him to make out the shadow of a hunkering man.

Now!

He leaps out from the shadow, swinging the heavily-laden bag like a weapon at his attacker.

The stranger decked from head to toe in black falters from the surprise attack. He is forced to take another step back as the weight hits him dead centre- quickly followed by a punch from Ichigo, letting out a pained groan as his world spins.

"Who sent y- the fuck!—"

The hood of his attacker slips off and Ichigo is more than a little shocked by the ghastly appearance of the creature underneath it. Whatever this thing is- it's not human. Yellow teeth- drool dripping from the corners of the gaping mouth and sunken cheeks make up the most sinister-looking skull-face he has ever seen. The thing's unfocused milky white eyes sharpened at him.

The creature throws itself at him, snarling with claws drawn out and aimed at his jugular.

Forced on the defensive, Ichigo doesn't hesitate. Instincts and years of experience have him throwing the bag of grocery at the ghoul as a distraction to buy him time. He takes off down the street in the opposite direction without looking back.

The bag rips, predictably; the contents of it spilling into the empty streets but it barely slows the creature down.

Outrunning him by a good minute, the creature lunges at him from his blind spot which he clumsily dodges. His back meets the wall of the alleyway, chipping off old paint and the uneven edges bite into his skin through his flimsy cotton shirt, drawing blood. He hisses in pain but there's barely even time to register it as the ghoul lunges again.

The strong jaw of the creature crushes the pieces of garbage Ichigo throws at it, rendering them into splinters. Its movements and attacks unrelenting and aimed to kill.

Weaponless as opposed to the creature's deadly bite and claws, Ichigo has neither the speed nor the agility to fully dodge the frenzied attacks. The odds are stacked against him and with every swipe and snarl; Ichigo feels his chances of survival dwindling.

He is crawling backwards on all four, back against the wall when his hand closes on a steel bar. He thanks the stars and whatever higher power there may be but knows that he is not out of the woods yet.

Grim determination sets in as his eyes harden.

He only gets one chance- one chance to get this right or he's dead and done for.

.

The ghoul rears up for its attack and Ichigo readies himself.

Mid-launch, the steel bar spears through the creature's twisted body. It gives a strangled cry, black blood oozing and dripping onto the pavement, over Ichigo's battered and bruised body. But Ichigo refuses to let go. He pushes it in deeper until he can hear the snap of muscles and soft tissues, and sees the metal protruding from the other side of the dead monster.

The ghoul flops over dead. Its weight settles on top of Ichigo and he eagerly hoists it off, eager to put some distance between them. The damn thing smells worse than the open sewage and rotten corpses.

Above him, there is an ominous roll of thunder and flashes of lightning that streak through the dark skies. Ichigo picks himself up wearily. He has no intention of being caught in the downpour.

Sharp pain shoots from his side as he hobbles. His hand comes up red and in disbelief, his eyes flit to the wound on his side, cut deep and the shred of cotton or what remains of his tattered shirt is soaked in the bloom of scarlet. The drip—drop of blood follows the pull of gravity, pattering onto the hot pavement.

He's been stabbed, he realizes belatedly and curses, that was his favourite shirt too.

.

Adrenaline fades and his legs give way from the blood loss.

A drop of something cool slides down his cheek before the torrent of rain follows, drenching him as he lays helpless on the deserted street, too weak to even yell for help.

He heaves a shaky breath, trying to make himself comfortable. The ache of the pain somehow dulling as the rain blurs his vision.

Cliché but he swears he sees his life flashing before him. And at the forefront of his strange musings and equally bizarre life cut short before his time, he remembers his first meeting with Rukia.

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There's nothing quite like satanic cults and human sacrifices to brighten up the prospects of the day.

Ichigo grimaced, looking at the crime scene photos with a deep frown as he sipped at his coffee. He should have never taken up Ishida on his offer.

This case had all the makings of a ritual killing. Missing child, dead parent cut open with palms splayed, gruesome markings etched- he scowled; it reminded him too much of his own loss.

A tip-off from Anonymous led him to an abandoned warehouse not too far away from the Docks, the scene of the first murder.

"Don't do anything stupid," Ishida had cautioned him against it, "It's just another prank call. I sent a team out to canvas that area hours ago. There's nothing in that warehouse."

But Ichigo wasn't convinced. Gut instincts screamed at him to take a closer look at it but he also wasn't about to pick a fight when they should be focusing the bulk of their resources and time into finding the missing girl. The first 48 hours are crucial.

He's tough and packing. That made the second part of his decision a no-brainer as he slinked in past the locked gates and rusted metal fences— alone.

What he found inside the warehouse though was enough to make him balk.

"Nothing to report, my ass," he mumbled, carefully avoiding the pile of animal bones strewn along the doorway. He thought he heard the scurrying of rats and other critters as he made his way in deeper, unable to shake off the feeling of being watched.

There's something else in here. He could feel it in his bones.

He drew his weapon as he wandered into a room with what seemed to be a laid altar with offerings of dead flowers and questionable animal remains.

Heavy clouds of sulphur and incense filled the air, making his eyes water. In the centre of the room, was a circle, curious glyphs and runes drawn in red that he strongly suspected to be blood, candles with half-burnt ends flickering.

There's a pull at him towards the circle. He didn't resist it. The minute he crossed the threshold though, the candles were snuffed out and a blinding white light enveloped him. A strange ringing echoed through the room.

When his vision cleared, there was a girl with two horns and a tail standing in front of him, violet eyes searing into his as she bowed somewhat mockingly.

"Took you long enough. I was beginning to think that I'll waste away here for another week before someone shows up."

He stared, slack-jawed at her nudity or rather her lack of shame at her own state of undress.

She was unimpressed. Tapping her foot impatiently, she looked at him and said, "Well don't just stand there and gape. State the terms of your contract and we'll see if something can be arranged."

.

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"Ichigo!"

The memory fades. The same pair of violet eyes are now boring deep into his.

"Rukia," he breathes. Talking is hard but he tries anyway. If it's to be his dying words, let them at least have meaning. Rukia- her existence and the events leading to her presence in his life are the only things that have ever made sense in a world said to have been created by an all-loving God and yet so full of injustice and hate.

"Stop talking! Damn it!"

He thinks she's smarter than that. He's lost too much blood now to ever come back whole. He is beyond saving at this point.

There's a light somewhere guiding him on. Maybe he'll see his mom after this; will she be proud of him- of what he's done with his life?

"I won't let you die."

There's a strange shimmering in the air. The shaft of light shining down on him is suddenly blotted out and he is falling-

Falling-

Falling-

.

He slams back into his body and chokes.

The pain is a hundred times sharper and a million times more jarring than he remembers. Brown eyes snap open just in time to see Rukia's kneeling body enshrouded in a silver ashy glow of light; her hand plunged deep into his chest.

The rain plasters her hair to her face; her eyes an unholy combination of black sclera and violet irises. She growls from the effort as her fingers tirelessly trace rune after rune across his broken body. The burnished ring of gold on his chest glows and hums with each and every character added.

Ichigo can only watch on in stunned silence as a cascade of something iridescent is siphoned from her and pulled into him. He thinks he hears singing, sweeter than the song of a nightingale and so beautiful that he thinks he just might cry from it.

She grits her teeth.

"Do you trust me?"

He nods.

She presses her lips to his. He surges forward to meet her and tastes the saltiness of her tears, mingled with that of the rain. There's a cut on her lip from where she had been biting too hard and the taste of it- like honey, decadent and syrupy, lingers on his palate.

The pain- or rather the absence of it grows and he feels something being anchored into place.

His heart.

Her heart.

There's something between them that is beyond words and whatever she's done, Ichigo knows it's life-changing for the both of them. He knows somehow, staring at the identical marks of a glowing glyph on the back of their palm.

They're bonded.

But even the very word seems inadequate to express this shimmer between them. There's a sliver of her- something inhuman— nay, a dark voice whispers, better than human— within him and it makes the world incomprehensibly sharper in his eyes, the taste of the summer air sweet on his tongue and the warmth of her skin so achingly perfect against his own as he holds her.

Pink flesh peeks through his tattered shirt. He is once again healed, whole, rendered into something new in her presence.

"So," he licks his dry lips, "did Hector ever managed to tell Maria that he loves her?"

"You idiot!"

She is shaking her head, calling him names for his recklessness. At length, she stops, and heaving a sigh of deep relief, grins at him, canines showing.

"Welcome back to the world of living, Master."

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FF/ao3

The 'I-accidentally-summoned-a-cute-demon-and-now-I-think-I'm-in-too-deep-to-let-her-go' AU

Also detective! Ichigo who solves crime with some help from the occult world- courtesy of his soulmate/familiar/contract partner demon! Rukia.

As always, review, like, reblog, comment or send me an ask to share random thoughts.

#ichiruki #ichirukimonth #irmonth2020 #Day 19: all my demons have your smile #day 21: supernatural #supernatural AU #fanfic #mine #the devil's advocate

[littledarlinwrites]

Ocean Eyes - Chapter 1

Burning Cities & Napalm Skies

Boxer!Bucky x Reader

Word count: 1459

Author's note: this is written for @saiyanprincessswanie, I hope you like it dear, and thank you so very much for being so patient! Also, shout out to my sweet alliebeans (@all1e23) for being my beta! I honestly don't know what I would do with you.

Warnings: abusive relationship. Yelling, cursing, degrading remark this is about 2 paragraphs long towards the end, if you need to skip this it's outlined with ~ at the beginning and end of those two paragraphs so you can skip that bit if needed. Bucky is barely in this chapter, however, he will be in the next, gotta set things up and all that jazz.

Sweat dripped from his brow, stinging his eyes. The sparring match with Steve lasting longer than most, until he saw a pretty girl walk in that caught his eye. Unfortunately, that was also the moment Steve's fist did too. 

"Oh shit, Buck? You okay?" Steve cursed. 

"Language Rogers," Bucky managed to chuckle out as Steve went to get him a bag of ice. He could tell even from a distance the girl was quiet, reserved, almost shy and meek. She was out of element, but also had an excitement sparkling in her eyes. Then he saw Rumlow wrap his arm around her waist. A sickening smirk sent Bucky's way. His eyes dropping back down to the mat beneath his feet until his trainers feet enter his line of sight.

"Time to call it a night. Pierce is here to train Rumlow. Want to grab a bite to eat?"

"Nah man, I'm not hungry." Bucky said as his stomach soured. He didn't like either man. Rumlow always was a macho alpha male, and Pierce was a slimy bastard who hasn't gotten caught working two opposing gyms, yet. Bucky had lost his appetite. 

****

You walked into the gym with your boyfriend. You were nervous, but the excitement that your boyfriend held was contagious, not to mention you hadn't stepped foot near a boxing ring since your dad passed away ten years ago. Boxing wasn't the same without him, and it always brought a bit of pain to your heart, but you swallowed it down to accompany your boyfriend to his practice session he demanded you attended. You felt his fingers grip nearly painfully into your waist, and you were sure you couldn't completely hide the grimace gracing your face. When Brock released you to go sit on one of the aluminum chairs there were set up around the ring. Your shoulder brushing the man leaving that caught your eye when you entered. He was focused, took a hit as well as he gave them, and his blue eyes were captivating. You caught his eyes once again as he apologized, his touch to you arm to steady you making your heart skip a beat, and it was gone in that same measure, almost causing it to falter.

You blinked and made your way to the chair beside a blonde man sitting with an open sketch book in his lap. The trainer that was working with the brunette that seems to have captivated you quickly. You sit down beside him, arms around yourself as you watched Brock train with Pierce. You couldn't help but glance at the sketchpad his pencil scratched against. The sketch, only half done, was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. It was of a woman, hair perfectly coiffed, captivating eyes, and the man was sketching out the makings of a smirk on her face. You couldn't help but gasp at the beautiful image.

"I hope that was a good thing." The man says with a smirk, but the brief glimpse at his eyes showed vulnerability. 

"Oh, sorry. It was. A good thing that is. It's beautiful."

"Ya think so?"

"Definitely. How long have you been working on it?"

"Started it last night after our third date. She's a helluva dame. She wants to see my artwork sometime soon. Just nervous about it."

"You shouldn't be. It's beautiful."

"Thanks. Ya know, I've seen you around here, but I don't think I've ever caught your name. I'm Steve Rogers, by the way."

"Y/N Y/L/N." You say, your trembling hand reaching his. His grasp was soft, gentle. Something you didn't realize could come from a man of his stature, let alone a boxer.

"It's nice to meet you. You Rumlow's girl?" Steve asks as he continues his sketch, his eyes glancing up every once and a while to show he was still engaged in the conversation.

"Uh, yeah." You responded, glancing up at Brock. The ferocious look on his face as he continued to practice sending a shiver down your spine.

"How long have you guys been together?"

"About three years."

"Wow, that's a while."

"Yeah. We met at a bar while I was out with the girls. Some guy spilled his drink all over me and then tried 'helping' to clean it up. Brock stepped in and the rest is history."

"Huh, didn't realize he was such a white knight. Then again he's on the other team that we usually spare against. Not like we all hang out drinking beers together after."

You and Steve continued chatting until Brock stood beside you with his hand gripping your shoulder.

"Time to go Y/N, I have an early morning." His tone left no room for argument. You stood with your eyes downcast, simply raising your hand to steve in a shy wave and began walking beside Brock into the cold night air.

That wasn't the last time you ran into Steve, you'd find him in the same spot with the same sketchpad most nights that Brock was training. You quickly learned that the nights he wasn't there were the nights that him and his friend which was also his boxer, Bucky, had a match. There was one fateful night, the night before Brock's match against Bucky, that Steve was there sketching. Your whole body was tense. You weren't sure how long you could keep doing this. Steve must have noticed since he slipped you a piece of paper with his number and a note which read, "in case you need anything." You left the gym that night with Brock as always, however, you could feel the anger radiating from him the entire way home. 

You jumped at the same of every door in your shared apartment, the sound of every heavy footfall. You knew the yelling was coming after the second slam of the fridge door. Brock must have been on his third or fourth drink by now.

You quietly left the bathroom to your shared bedroom. You dreaded it every night. Crawling into the same bed with the man you used to love, but now all you do is fear.

Surprisingly you were able to fall asleep quickly, and stay that way through the night. When you woke you could hear Brock in the kitchen. You saw his empty gym bag at the foot of the bed and decided to start packing it for him. You were almost finished when he walked into the bedroom. 

"Hey baby." He whispers in your ear as his hands run across the still tender flesh of your arms. 

"Hey." You stammer out breathlessly. You feel like caged prey, but you also can't help but relax into his embrace, one that could be loving when he wanted to be, like now. You pull out his red shorts, folding them so they wouldn't wrinkle in his bag.

"Wait. You're packing my red shorts? Are you kidding me!" He spats as his grip tightens. "You know that's the other team's colors. I wear black for matches, you know that!" You quickly moved out of the way as he ripped the shorts from your hands and tossed them across the room. You sat down on your side of the bed with your knees to your chest.

~~~~~~~~~

"You're absolutely useless you know that?" He says as he begins repacking his bag. "You knew I had a match today yet here you were lazing about in bed all morning before you decided to drag your ass out of it to pack my bag. Couldn't make me breakfast, couldn't clean. You can't do anything right!" He says as he strides over to your side of the bed after zipping his bag closed. He grabbed your still bruised upper arms causing you to flinch, but you knew better than to fight back. 

"At least be ready to celebrate my win tonight, you've slept enough for it. Unless I need to go find someone who can at least fuck me right." He spat in your face before shoving you backwards, causing the back of your head the thump against the wall hard enough to cause spots to dance across your vision. You felt yourself being tossed around, handing mapping their way across your skin in the unloving manner you became accustomed to. You heard a voice shouting obscenities, degrading you, your worth. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A while later your vision cleared as you heard the door slam. Brock had left the apartment. You struggled from your spot in the corner onto shakey and bruised legs. You made your way to the book you had stashed between the mattress and box spring, your fingers fumbling for the price of paper shoved between its pages.

"Steve, I need your help."

#bucky barnes x reader #boxer!bucky x reader #bucky x reader #boxer au #ocean eyes

[sunarintoes]

Synopsis: Yn Ln is an environmentalist - Miyagi University’s very own campus ‘Green Thumb.’ One day Hinata Shōyō who happens to be a close friend of Yn, invites them to come to one of his races. The only problem is that this race of his, is illegal. Read the journey of Yn who has been sucked into the world of illegal street racing with the one goal: to create an eco-friendly race car.

WC: 1.8K

Note: is this character development I smell? 👀

Vanilla Bean Frappe

You slowly make your way down to the Karasuno club room, Sugawara had run off to the bathroom which left you alone; not that you minded of course. Sometimes a little bit of peace and quiet while you wander past various different crews is nice. It allows you to have the freedom of walking from place to place and being able to let your eyes roam around your surroundings. Normally with Sugawara you had only kept your eyes on him and the road ahead, not wanting to seem disinterested in the many things he talked about. You notice how the clubrooms are closely packed together, the smaller teams sit in one area while the bigger teams are only a few metres apart - and that the more… successful crews have more members and a larger room. Shiratorizawa was slightly larger than Dateko’s, Seijoh and Karasuno’s. You guess it's simply because they are the champions and need the extra room to store their trophies. Dateko and Karasuno are on the same side, Seijoh and Shiratorizwa mirror them which forms a square between them. You let a small smile ease it’s way onto your face, it was freezing but you were excited to speak with Shouyou and congratulate him on his race. 

You freeze when you hear a quiet sob, you narrow your eyes as you look around you but no one seems to be crying - there’s no one outside either. Just when you get ready to move again you hear another sob, and against your brain’s desire, you make your way to the sound. You can't help yourself, you hate it when someone is in pain.

There is a figure hunched over behind a tree and from where you’re standing they look like a guy. You slowly walk up to them and put your hand on their shoulder before crouching down next to them; ‘hey are you alright-- Oikawa! What are you doing here?’

Oikawa wipes the tears off of his face and looks away from you, his body shrinking into itself as if he was trying to protect himself. ‘Listen up, brat, I don't care about you nor do I know you. Why are you here? What did I do to deserve being plagued by you? Why can't you just leave me alone huh?’

You retract your hand and let out a long sigh. He was obviously upset and didn't mean the things he said; or maybe he did, but it didn't matter, all that mattered was that you knew he was alright - even if you despised him to some degree. ‘Oikawa… I’m sorry, I'm not sure what’s made you so distraught but I want to help… is there anything I can do-’

‘No! Just leave! I don't want nor do I need you here.’

The kind smile you put up to comfort him shakes a little before it regains its composure. ‘Should I get Hajime?’

The atmosphere becomes deafeningly silent and stays that way for a minute, ‘no,’ he whispers as more tears roll down his crimson cheeks, ‘I know we have this strange relationship where we both dislike each other but do me a solid, don’t tell anyone you saw me like this.’

You have to lean in close to hear him and you find yourself shivering at his voice, it was smooth and sweet like chocolate and you think it suits him completely. ‘I promise, and I know we don't like each other, but I have an idea to make you feel better… let's be friends for the night,’ you say as you place your hand back on his shoulder.

He flinches like last time while he looks at you - shock written all over his face, ‘I'm sorry what?’

You lose your balance which results into you falling onto your behind and you feel your face heat up; ‘I- well, it's just that I thought maybe we could just head over to some fast food restaurant and get you a drink to cheer you up and get your mind off of whatever and, and I uh thought maybe it was best to go with me because um I don't know maybe a stranger’s company is what you need?’

He scowls at you before sighing and getting up, ‘yeah… maybe you’re right. Let's be friends for the night.’

✄.

You find yourself in the passenger seat of Oikawa’s car and despite your initial thoughts, the car doesn't smell half bad - in fact it smells good, it reminds you of hot cocoa on a winter’s day. You look out the window and see the street lamps fly by and soon enough, you arrive at an all day Starbucks located at a seemingly abandoned gas station. 

Oikawa gets out of the car first and walks around to open the door for you; ‘you didn't have to do that…’

‘I didn't but I did anyway so you should be saying thank you.’

You resist the urge to scoff and instead, opt to roll your eyes in a semi playful manner, ‘yeah you're right, thank you my King,’ you fake courtesy after you get out.

You look up to see him scowling down at you but still doing his best to bite down a smile, ‘come on, let's just get a drink and never speak again.’ You laugh at that.

✄.

‘I'll get one vanilla bean frappe, thank you, oh uh… medium size thank you!’

‘Your orders will be ready shortly!’ says the cashier.

Oikawa leads you over to an empty table that was seated towards the back of the food court. ‘So you have a sweet tooth huh?’

‘Yeah I guess… could say the same for you? An iced coffee with caramel.’

His lips twitch up into a smile, ‘yeah I guess.’

You sigh as you lean back into the chair, ‘we totally got off on the wrong foot, didn't we?’

Oikawa looks out the window, ‘yeah we totally did… I guess I'm partly to blame.’

You make a sound of agreement, ‘yep. I know you said that this would be a one time thing, but I think so far it’s been nice to be with someone who doesn't really know you. I'm not sure… I'm tired so I'm really just rambling.’

‘No, I understand perfectly. Being with a stranger, someone who doesn’t know you, feels free I guess. They don't know what's going on in your head and they are entitled to know how you're feeling or whatever.’

Silence takes over as you both continue to drink. ‘Maybe… maybe we could become friends or something?’

Oikawa sighs and looks at you with an unreadable expression, ‘no. That's the deal we made, we aren't going to become friends. But… you did help me feel a bit better I guess, I'm not crying anymore so that's a plus…’

You bite your lip and look away, contemplating on what to say next. Oikawa’s gaze is still focused on you, making you feel small. You look him in the eyes, ‘let's stay as strangers.’

He lets out an amused scoff, ‘stay as strangers? What's the supposed to mean?

Suddenly you feel nervous, naked and exposed. ‘Well I just thought that uh maybe, maybe you and I could, umm, we could y'know do this every so often? But stay as strangers… we just meet up get a drink and stay in each other’s presence but we don't get to know each other-’

‘I like it. But let's set some rules as well, yeah?’ your eyes widen in shock, you didn't think he would actually agree. ‘First off, no interacting with each other away from this, and if we do we continue to be rude to each other? We stay as far away as possible - mentally that is.’

‘Second rule, no falling in love.’

‘Shouldn't that be obvious?’

‘I- yes, yes it should but you seem to have a thick skull so I have to make sure you know.’

He smirks, ‘well, looks like you can be mean.’

‘What's that supposed mean!?’

‘Oh? Absolutely nothing darling,’ oh, there it is; that irritating pet name, ‘let's continue with our rules. I say for rule three we tell nobody.’

‘Agreed, so far we have, one - stay as strangers, two - don't fall in love slash become friends and three, tell nobody. How about one more, we can confide in our problems with each other but not get to know each other on a personal level?’

‘I like that.’ he smiles, and God it is so beautiful. I think that’s about right. How about I take you home?’

You look up at him and smile, ‘that’d be helpful.’

✄.

You watch as Oikawa’s car speeds off into the night before you make your way to your apartment which is regrettably on the third floor. Trudging up the stairs you curse at yourself for making a deal with the devil - no, not Oikawa, but with the landlord who told you that the ‘three flights of stairs was short and easy to walk up.’ What utter bullshit. 

You pull out your apartment keys and go to open the door but something is blocking your way. Looking up from the floor you find this something to be someone, and this very someone is the very ex-lover who shattered your heart. ‘Kiyoko,’ your voice is breathy and shaky, it sounds as though you are trying to convince yourself that what you see before you is real and not an illusion.

She looks down, ‘hey Yn,’ she starts off softly, ‘I thought maybe we could talk… you weren't at The Garage tonight with everyone else and I assumed you still lived in the same apartment.’

You glare at her, ‘I'm sorry what? How do you know about The Garage?’

Kiyoko looks taken aback, ‘I'm the other manager. You didn't know that?’

Now it's your turn to be confused, ‘no, no I did not. I just assumed that someone had the same name as you…’ you felt like an idiot because what you are telling her is the honest truth. 

She quietly giggles, ‘I see. Well I haven't been there the past two weeks… I've been out of town-’

‘Please just get to the point,’ you beg.

‘I think it’s fate. I want to give it another go- I want to give us another go. I still have your number and I know you still have mine…’

You scowl at her as you walk past into your apartment, ‘and get my heartbroken? Again! No thanks.’ And with that, the conversation is over and the door is slammed on Kiyoko’s face.

You walk into your room and sit besides the bed. Kiyoko’s offer is tempting, you really do want nothing more than to climb back into her arms and inhale her scent, you want nothing more than for her to run her hands through your hair as she places delicate kisses to your forehead. ‘Fuck!’ you yell out.

✄.

Kiyoko walks down the stairs to Sugawara’s car, ‘How’d it go?’ he asks. She looks away and he takes it as a sign that she doesn't want to speak about it. ‘Still, I really had no idea you and Yn had a history like that… Why did you two break up?’ She stays silent and Sugawara knows he should drop the subject.

Taglist: @dadchi-oya @cutepet09

#kiyoko x reader #oikawa x reader #iwaizumi x reader #various x reader #various!haikyuu x reader #adkor #street racer au #haikyuu street racer au #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x yn #haikyuu x you

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Boxing Day Extravaganza boop Jimmy: Okay so we know they're taking the train Jimmy: which appaz only takes like 35 mins so that's nice, not to have to entertain the kids for an age Jimmy: cos everywhere would be busy and hellish given that it's boxing day Janis: nice lil' journey, no one has time to get antsy, probably only need to do one hellish train toilet moment per child lol Jimmy: we can all get arty because Jimothy promised to keep doing the bae daily masterpieces Janis: get a table seat, love that for yous Jimmy: Cass just on her phone 🎧 being antisocial the whole time, love you gal, but the rest of us are living our best lives Jimmy: having hot chocolate and all the left over gingerbread and other festive snacks like 😁 Janis: you'll end up having an alright time in your own tween way don't worry Janis: the plethora of christmas toys that you've simply had to bring Jimmy: maybe you can have a Lisa beach friends moment Janis: that'd be cute, some kids at the arcade or something Jimmy: much more British and chill because we haven't stolen Ian's car for you to cover with 🐚s sadly Janis: I used to make friends on hols, live laugh love with whatever kids have also been dragged to Skerries lol Jimmy: I did not which tells you everything you need to know about how shy I was and how much my sister didn't want us to have other friends when we were kids Janis: gatekeeper trace so rude Janis: okay, so we're getting there, what do we wanna hit, obviously all the beachy cliches we can and also some festive ones Jimmy: gonna have a dip in the sea even though it's freezing af even if you only put your feet in lads Jimmy: the awkward moment when you think you only have a day here so you're gonna cram it all in and then be like oh Janis: don't be babies you can do it Janis: not the actual babies though, you will die Jimmy: stay with Cass even though I'm certain Libi will wanna do it Janis: she will be tryna run lmao Jimmy: soz for that Cass Jimmy: you'll be able to go off with your mates when you meet them, just give jj the chance to be competitive in the sea for a sec Jimmy: obvs gotta win something piss easy in the arcade and then lowkey bankrupt yourself trying to get the same thing for the other kid as always happened to my dad LOL Janis: hohaha yes Janis: also last time we went to an arcade you could get gross sour sweets with the tickets so the kids will be pinging Jimmy: love that Jimmy: Jimothy see how many you can fit in your mouth/eat because I would Janis: changing money into all the 2ps for the penny falls and having the cup for the money fun Jimmy: I bloody love an arcade tbh all that good stuff and beach fun and snow fun because it has to snow more for the trains to stop running since you got there okay Janis: when you realize it's coming down fast hun Janis: and I oop Jimmy: should've tried to leave as soon as the snow started but we're not because we don't wanna Jimmy: even though that phone call to Ian to tell him you aren't coming back will be lovely and put you in a great mood Janis: like you LOVE spending time with your kids ok sir Janis: everyone gonna be lowkey pissed soz weather happens lads Jimmy: we're with all our fave peeps we'll soon cheer up and live our best lives Jimmy: we definitely need there to be some board games in this caravan Jimmy: crack out the uno Janis: its not like you're without shelter and warmth, everyone will be fine, we're all buzzing lbr Janis: yes, all the board games, there'll at least be a telly to watch festive shit on Jimmy: Jimothy will make so much tea, we'll be cosy Janis: you should also eat comfort food like beans on toast ty Jimmy: make a little soft world/den for the bubs Janis: campout in the lounge 'cos you're not gonna wanna share a room alone but also don't wanna be separated so enjoy the double moment Cass Jimmy: winning her over with that Janis: at least that's an excuse if we want to message 'cos no privacy whilst they're out here snuggling Jimmy: true that's a good idea Jimmy: and won't wanna wake them by talking out loud when they're eventually asleep which would probably take forever cos buzzing Janis: my thoughts exactly, and it means we can ref a bit without literally sitting here listing every possible thing ourselves Jimmy: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jimmy: 👍? Janis: can't really accuse you of making it snow Janis: but my foot does feel in danger again 🪓💘 Jimmy: just do 🌧 me Janis: next doodle sorted Janis: get loads of likes Jimmy: blank page would an' all long as I do a #goals caption Janis: show off Janis: not much chance of me giving you #goals muse inspo in day old clothes so you'll have to rely on that clout Jimmy: LITERALLY the opposite, about the muse not my 🎨 Jimmy: and there's every chance if you don't wear any clothes, duh Janis: you still have to think up the words Janis: and 🔥 emoji usage 🙌😩 Jimmy: nowt challenging about that Jimmy: 😍💕or 🤤 Janis: how much chance do you reckon there is of no clothes Janis: meant to be 🥶 to death here Jimmy: depends how 🔥 you reckon I am Janis: 💯 Janis: obviously Jimmy: but I get it, any excuse for a shopping trip, girl Janis: 🤑🛍😍 Janis: you know me so well Jimmy: meant to be working tomorrow, take your chance while there's still 💰 to be after Janis: bummer Janis: it should clear soon, can't have you pining for it too hard, like Jimmy: 🥺☕💔🎻😭 Jimmy: @ my manager before he has chance to miss me Janis: *replace you Janis: 😬😶 Jimmy: 😱😱 Janis: literally who said that, omg Janis: so rude! Jimmy: brb gotta 👻 there to serve some lattes Janis: yeah, you'll need to wife it before you try and leave me with 3 kids Jimmy: weren't no 💍 in the grabbers, looks like we're going shopping after all, babe Janis: missed a trick there, honestly Janis: probably had a ring pop if we'd looked harder Jimmy: Libi'd have that right off you, mate Jimmy: don't even have to jilt you Jimmy: replaced mid-proposal Janis: true Janis: and she needs no more sugar ever again Janis: ❌ Janis: you'll have to just stay put, soz Jimmy: were gonna get you one of them mood rings but it'd give the game away by saying you weren't ALWAYS 😍 Jimmy: only need the one fan 👀 Janis: how dare you doubt my acting abilities Janis: ALWAYS on and ready for my close up Jimmy: that ain't acting it's 🔮 OBVS Janis: magic, talent Janis: all the same to me 🥇👑 Jimmy: alright bighead, go on Janis: go on what? Jimmy: always on, you said Jimmy: impress me with one of your talents Janis: here and now? Jimmy: might be on for a bit weren't what you said Janis: Libi's already seen you partially clothed once Janis: not trying to traumatize them permanently Jimmy: what you bringing me into it for? it's your talent Janis: already shown you how to juggle too Jimmy: there's nowt else? Janis: rude Janis: you made me sing to you as well, if you recall Jimmy: tah for the reminder to send that to Pete Jimmy: he's looking for a lead 🎤 so I've heard Janis: I'd literally kill you Jimmy: shouldn't have to beg you Jimmy: you know that's all I want Janis: 😤 Janis: obviously all I want it to have an ill-fated romance with Pete but you stagemomming me was not part of the dream Jimmy: you look SO cute when you're fuming Jimmy: what's your plan then? Janis: find a totally natural way to drop hints that I'm dead talented over my lattes, duh Janis: writing lyrics in a notebook, being SO cute 🤔 Jimmy: he's got a girlfriend with a normal sized head, but I think he can read so you're probably on to something there with the last bit Janis: normal? Janis: how...exciting Jimmy: you'll find a natural way to drop hints you're after a threesome an' all I'm sure Janis: sounds like a 🥈 move Janis: if I can't get her chucked what is the point Jimmy: perfect for you, that Janis: in no world am I runner-up Janis: fake or otherwise Jimmy: not to her, just to me Janis: you don't do co-workers, you're disqualified Jimmy: you reckon you could get her chucked but I couldn't get him sacked Janis: 😱 Janis: then comfort him, that's evil Janis: okay 💀👑 Jimmy: 😈 Jimmy: haven't seen her for ages, bit of normality for you, that Janis: me? Janis: she's your favourite customer Janis: clearly spend loads of time chatting and plotting Jimmy: that's Tammy, how dare you Jimmy: she orders loads Janis: she needs the energy for her tiktok dances Janis: don't call her fat Jimmy: that were you Jimmy: I would NEVER Janis: nah, 'course not Janis: she's your bestie Jimmy: #BFF Jimmy: but that's you an' all so Jimmy: 💔 for her Janis: I'm not sharing Jimmy: I'm not making you Janis: you know she'd take a bigger piece Jimmy: she'd try but you'd 🥊 her Janis: you want me to fight for you Jimmy: if she's after me, you're gonna have to protect me Janis: alright Janis: guess I don't wanna see you squashed to death Jimmy: get these bandages off first before I need another set Janis: you can go have an ice bath Janis: if you wanna Jimmy: why would I want that? Jimmy: sounds fucking horrible Janis: not because you're being too 🥵 idiot Janis: to help with the swelling Jimmy: 🙄 I got that Janis: you went in the sea Janis: you just have to sit for a bit longer Jimmy: you didn't wanna be left with 3 kids a bit ago Jimmy: make up your mind, Jeanette Janis: later then Janis: just don't scream and wake them up Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 Janis: we'll 👀 Jimmy: yeah and you won't hear nowt Janis: 😏 Janis: did it hurt less today Jimmy: [throws a cushion at her for the 😏 and to distract from having to answer that because probably hurt more if anything all the fun and games they've done today] Janis: [inadvertantly start a pillow fight here which you need to then calm back down] Janis: don't think I didn't notice Jimmy: ? Janis: you didn't answer Jimmy: you reckon I never do Janis: it speaks volumes Janis: you're alright Jimmy: there you go then Janis: if you're alright with it being inferred, yeah Jimmy: dunno about your 🤓🗨 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: I'm alright, leave it out Janis: fine Janis: no hot chocolate for you Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: you're SO rude Janis: yep Janis: that's what you get Jimmy: but Jimmy: we're best mates Janis: maybe Janis: but Bobbys nicer to me so he's getting extra marshmallows Jimmy: it were you going on about how you were gonna be nice to me Jimmy: should've known it were bollocks Janis: you threw the first pillow, mate Jimmy: you chucked out a pisstakey 😏 before that Jimmy: weren't me who started it Janis: not my fault you're known for being well loud Jimmy: isn't it? Jimmy: I'd say it were your fault Janis: don't make me 😏 again Jimmy: alright I'll make you 😳 Janis: I'll blame the ☕s Jimmy: you want a hand? Janis: [throw a LOOK from your kitchen area] Jimmy: [come on over boy and be giving her a LOOK back the entire time obvs] Janis: [do the thing where the kitchen is too small so you're lowkey just in each other's way the whole time in a #mood of a moment like so much more of a hindrance than a help] Jimmy: [and also the thing where you kiss only to break apart as if nothing happened if anyone notices] Janis: [Bobby would be used to you having a gf about as the last one moved herself in but Libi is not so she'd be the kind of kid to be like UMMMMMMM] Jimmy: [Oh Libi you are such an icon] Janis: [just like why you kissing are you boyfriend and girlfriend, Janis like shh bitch] Jimmy: [Jimothy's turn to be 😏 irl] Janis: [when you can't be like NO 'cos how confusing for the kids but you're like not gonna confess my love gal, hush, Libi is so gonna try and smooch Bobby watch out boy] Jimmy: [so here for that adorableness tbh] Janis: [when lil kids are like this is my boyfriend lmao] Janis: you've been replaced now Janis: how does it feel 💔 Jimmy: 🎻🎻😭😭😭 Janis: that's what you get Janis: dumping me mid proposal Jimmy: you keep saying that Jimmy: but from here I ain't proposed yet Janis: don't let on Janis: she'll be raging Jimmy: I'll take her with me tomorrow when I go pick the 💍 Jimmy: get her back on side Janis: got a plan for everything, you Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Janis: wait until its later in the year and I'm jonesing for more 🎁 again Jimmy: no need, you can have owt you want whenever you want it Jimmy: there's the plan, like Janis: well goals 😍😍 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: if nothing else Janis: plenty of 🌨 to play with tomorrow Jimmy: I do take requests Jimmy: have a 💭 what ⛄ you want Janis: well you are pretty skilled Janis: have to think of something challenging Jimmy: you've got all night Janis: if they ever go to sleep Jimmy: you'll have to read them a long boring story Janis: ❌ voices ❌ personal cameos for you kids Jimmy: get Bill's 👻 in Jimmy: owt of his'll get the job done Janis: 😱😱 so true but you didn't have to go there, babe Jimmy: he can't be fuming that I want you to stay with me, it's his whole brand Janis: 🤞 he don't get too carried away with your 💀 scene now or they'll be having nightmares and then there'll be no time for ⛄ Jimmy: they'll be able to hack it Janis: hack you up into lots of pieces Jimmy: don't matter about me, long as no 🐕s are 💀💀💀 Janis: if nothing he knows his audience Jimmy: I get it, you wanna marry him Janis: pretty sure he's married Janis: bet he's got more than 3 kids as well Jimmy: and what you're gonna let that stop you? doubt that Janis: rude Janis: breaking up Pete and his groupie is one thing Janis: homewrecking is another Jimmy: 👌 Janis: you're 👌 at me now Jimmy: I just did do Jimmy: you'll be chuffed to know I had a look and he has got 3 kids Jimmy: one of them was a twin called Judith, so you might be his daughter Janis: like he had twins or one survived Janis: I'll take being the 💀 one if that's the option Jimmy: the dead one was a lad Janis: ugh Janis: great Janis: more lesbian jokes Jimmy: we've 💀💀💀 them, you're alright Janis: had no idea Judith was such an old name Jimmy: can't say I ain't taught you owt 🤓 Jimmy: know my audience an' all Janis: can't help yourself 🤓 Janis: I reckon Jimmy: you can't help nerd flirting with me, more like Jimmy: about to crack the chess set out, you Janis: chequers, maybe Jimmy: dunno never played Janis: just chess for thick people Janis: less 🤔🤓 more 🥴🤯 Jimmy: still too northern 💔 what were I gonna do make the bits out of 🥔 Janis: don't reckon we've got it in so you're safe Jimmy: what do you wanna do instead? Janis: that's the question Jimmy: answer it then Jimmy: [a LOOK] Janis: [😳] Janis: it's not obvious? Jimmy: might be but it should be just as obvious that I wanna hear it Janis: how badly I want some alone time with you just increased Jimmy: 🚬? Janis: worth a go Jimmy: [do your best to try and escape lads] Janis: [probably enough into our hot chocolate/festive film to give you a few minutes here] Jimmy: [take your chance and leg it] Janis: [lord knows you need the moment Jimmy: [it's deserved you didn't know you'd still be here with all these kids and no privacy whatsoever] Janis: [what a time, at least you don't have to go home and separate 'cos heaven forbid] Jimmy: [that would suck, the time between boxing day and nye is weird enough if you like your fam and aren't a highkey teen in love so] Janis: [hence 'I missed you' like you've not spent forever together at this point and barely been apart] Jimmy: [hence the most genuine smile ever like an adorable nerd because whatever he was expecting her to say was not that but we're here for it] Janis: [when you go to nudge him like shut up but it's more of a feelsy lean and we all know it 'sorry about missing work' 'cos we feel bad even if there's fuck all we can or could do about it] Jimmy: [always gotta give that feelsy lean back regardless of how much it hurts us which gets him thinking about how much work would suck being this injured so we're 😒 which makes it seem like we're really annoyed about missing work even though we know he'd rather be here, hence the shrug he does when he snaps out of said thoughts 'you're my fave job any road, said it before' stop calling her a job sir even if you said that in a more feelsy tone than the words suggest] Janis: ['charming as the first time' and a 🙄 we're probably playing off as more jokey than it is] Jimmy: ['nowt I'd wanna be doing more than pissing about here with you, what could be more charming than that?' maybe if you'd said that in the first place boy instead of calling her a job again] Janis: ['I'm against serving coffee to ungrateful dickheads, it's not much to brag about, like' but a shrug and 😏 'cos we're not fuming over it] Jimmy: ['loads else you could if you wanted to' just telling her she's 🥇 basically there 'but I'll do it if not' casual hypeman is how that sounds but we're just 😍] Jimmy: [when I was asleep a little list of things he likes about her/she could brag about came to me so I'll try and recreate it from memory for us now, first he was obvious and just wrote fit on her arm or wherever but then did a camera and painting mime to emphasise that and tell her she was a good muse before adding mysterious where he wrote fit but then it started getting cute cos he drew little vampire teeth in the air above her smile and a sun on her face which he added the 😁 grin to obvs and then because we were in that general area he wrote nerd in caps on her neck across the biggest lovebite because not only is she such a one but to include nerd flirting then we moved to her throat and he did 🗨 because he likes talking to her and added a 🎵 inside because she's genuinely a good singer then wrote fun before adding the ny as well cos she's also a laugh then he went down to where her abs are and wrote athlete also in caps because DUH and finally on her ribs did the ✔ again because she's been taking care of him and is so kind and nice etc and while he was there got carried away just drawing an elaborate and massive rose for all the love and feels we can't currently express] Jimmy: [there might have been others I'm forgetting but those were definitely the main ones] Janis: [I'm dying boo, we're going to have to be physical because if we aren't speechless then things will be said but it's going to be the most intense and loving ever so we know] Jimmy: [not letting that be interrupted, soz children fend for yourselves for a minute please] Janis: [it's not like we've gone far, you're fine and we need this so we don't die] Jimmy: [my half asleep day dream has killed us all I am soz] Janis: [we're not soz at all, y'all living your best life] Jimmy: [the feels have never been higher] Janis: [are gonna have to force you back in eventually] Jimmy: [if only so y'all don't declare your love in words as well] Janis: [smack on that window children because it's too damn soon hush] Jimmy: [Libi 👀 to see if you're kissing] Janis: [she's gonna tell everyone lmao, tiniest shipper] Jimmy: [I love her with my whole heart] Janis: [mcvickers getting that lowdown they did not ask for when we're back, accidental snitching, at least we're being good-ish lmao] Jimmy: [Fearghal gonna be so amused, Tess will not LOL but yeah you've taken good care of this bub so you win points for that lads] Janis: [can't say fairer than that] Jimmy: [gonna be so heartbreaking when you're not allowed to stay there and see Libi, I could cry] Janis: [we have to make things go so downhill in a sec in a lot of ways, sad times] Jimmy: [winnie will love the drama, but for now go inside and try and get these kids to fall asleep] Janis: [threaten them with separation if they don't start to chill, that'll work] Jimmy: [try not to lol at how horrified they are at the prospect] Janis: 😱💔💀 Jimmy: #relatable for you, that Janis: you wish Jimmy: 🎂 Jimmy: ain't even Jesus' birthday no more Jimmy: can't piggyback off that Janis: sound like a right parent Janis: over before it's even started Jimmy: none of the fans know when mine is, might just have it so you have to get me more 🎁🎁🎁 Janis: that's not fair Janis: you'll get whatevers left in the grabber and that'll be that Janis: you'll have to pretend you won it for me and all or it's not very #goals Jimmy: told you loads of times I don't play fair, Jules 🏆 and that's that Jimmy: spoil me on my fake birthday or you ain't very #goals Janis: well used to bdays not being fair 🎻🎻 Janis: 15 years too late for that to sting Jimmy: poor baby Jimmy: hang on, I'll knock you up your own 🎂 Jimmy: [genuinely goes to make her a mug cake in secret, look away children there's none for you bye] Janis: such a 🤓 Janis: [like we're not 😍] Jimmy: So you don't want it? Alright Jimmy: [we know she do] Janis: never said that Janis: [grabby hands like gimme] Jimmy: [🤫 which he always looks hot doing like okay cover me so you don't have to share this with the children] Janis: [🤐 like I got this] Jimmy: [cleaning the kitchen but also sneaky doing this and when it's done gesturing for her to come here so they can swap places and she can sneakily eat it, just know he has 1000% put a little candle it in and lit it with the best lighter ever because every mum has a drawer of shit like that it's simply facts] Janis: [obviously taking a picture of this] Janis: why are you Jimmy: 'cause you're Jimmy: and I just Janis: you're Janis: too nice Jimmy: Bollocks Janis: nah Jimmy: yeah Janis: to me Jimmy: I'm as nice as I wanna be to you Janis: I ain't earnt it Jimmy: when have I said that? Janis: you haven't but it's still true Jimmy: up to me is what it is Janis: you hand out the 🏆 Jimmy: take yours Jimmy: you've been nice to me for ages Jimmy: what were it I said the other day, you'd be telling me to piss off by the end of this one Jimmy: worth a 🏆 that you've not Janis: just in it for the cake Janis: obviously Jimmy: you've done alright then Janis: it's not hard Janis: being nice to you Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say to make a cake Janis: [irl 😏 from the kitchen trying not to lol] Jimmy: didn't know I were fake dating a dickhead like Paul Hollywood Janis: again, you wish Jimmy: no denying that 👴💕 Jimmy: but I'll have to make do with a  🤝 off you for now Janis: [obviously come back over and do said handshake like a nerd and like it's not dangerous to be anywhere near each other rn] Jimmy: [you know he's gonna run his thumb across her lip whether there's any chocolate there or not because the mood we're in and we can pretend it's because it's so secret like can't let the children see the evidence] Janis: [thank god for the solid excuse to snuggle like we're going sleep now come on] Jimmy: [just 👀 at these kids all the damn time like are you asleep yet] Janis: [finally] Janis: I think she's asleep Janis: he's 50/50 Jimmy: [chucks something at him, softly obvs] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: that was a risk Jimmy: [😏 because we love a risk like that] Jimmy: didn't reckon on you as 🙀🙀 Janis: you reckoned right then Janis: good for you Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: don't get carried away Janis: I'm the one that's not scared Jimmy: prove it Janis: [a look that's half well how would you like me to do that and half, I'm thinkin'] Jimmy: [just a LOOK like] Janis: [I like to think you two are at least in the middle 'cos Libi and Bobby wouldn't stop chatting so you had to make a human barrier lol, so that makes it less hard to kiss him now and give him a new quick love bite but also harder to just stop there] Jimmy: [you know you're getting one back for literally no reason whatsoever gal] Janis: [casually trying have a makeout sesh in total silence rn] Jimmy: [we know how impossible that is for either of you so good luck] Janis: [gonna have to stop and pretend you're just being like, see, not scared] Jimmy: [gonna have to go for that ice bath for all the reasons now boy lol] Janis: they're definitely asleep Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: I would've woke up Jimmy: you don't sleep 🧛 Janis: you want me to? Janis: [turning our back like night then] Jimmy: [you know we're rolling you back to face us girl even if it hurts us because have to be hot about everything] Janis: [a noise we're 🤞 just sounds like a sleepy sound 'cos there was no helping it] Jimmy: [kiss her so you don't make any of your own thank you sir, don't need to tempt fate and risk waking these kids up that soon] Janis: [can't even go to another room really 'cos doubt Cass is asleep] Jimmy: [she definitely isn't, soz lads for this struggle] Janis: 😣 😖 😫 😩 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 😳 🥵 Janis: just so you know Jimmy: I did but now it's in writing I've gotta do something about it Janis: 👻 rules or? Jimmy: the only 👻 rule is no touching, don't reckon that'll sort it Janis: remind me why we invited them Jimmy: Ian's a twat, that were mostly it Janis: right Janis: that sounds about right Jimmy: least the 🐕's not here an' all Janis: 🌦 Jimmy: give us a bit more ☀ Janis: that's me and you though Jimmy: what kind of dickhead am I pushing in front of you like that? SO rude Janis: I'm so shy Janis: understated, honestly Jimmy: [when you're trying to stop yourself from loling] Janis: [fake punch him like oi] Janis: about to call you chivalrous but you can forget it now Jimmy: soz you can't have the 🙊 it's a bit too risky for me to use Janis: such an idiot Janis: why'd I invite you again Jimmy: Dunno Jimmy: @ me when you've worked it out Janis: you're too busy to show me? Jimmy: ❌ Jimmy: too something though Jimmy: 😣 😖 😫 😩 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 😳 🥵 Janis: you needed an ice bath anyway Janis: see how far we get without freezing? Janis: [getting up carefully to find 🚬s or a lighter like ?] Jimmy: [doing a help me up style gesture] Janis: [do, do not drop him now and do a throwback by kissing him against the door as you go out] Jimmy: [we love a throwback in this house honey] Janis: [thank god for cigarette breaks even though it will be very cold, we're extra] Jimmy: [your extraness will help keep you warm] Jimmy: [literally reminds me of when Baze had just got together and went on a caravan hol with the fam] Janis: [yes, very that energy, the sneaking is less high stakes but still] Jimmy: [you can go in harder than they could out there because less likely to be caught and less of a problem if you are so you're welcome for that] Janis: [literally we just don't want to wake the kids and make them cranky or cringe Cass out so you're fine lads, go nuts, who is at this caravan park in December, barely anyone] Jimmy: [fill your boots, you're very in love rn] Janis: [lowkey something is gonna get said during we're gonna have to pretend we do not hear lmao] Jimmy: [walking such a tightrope at all times, god bless] Janis: [go pretend to sleep lol] Jimmy: [the amount of things he would have to stop himself from saying when they are, you hush your mouth I swear down] Janis: [hence you ain't allowed, commit to this act please and ty, no more chit chatting] Jimmy: [he's not even allowed to say her name at this point so literally shhhhhh] Janis: [made that rod for your back boo lmao] Jimmy: [no regrets, it will HIT when he does] Jimmy: [you know he's not asleep though cos you know he can't get comfortable thanks for that Ian you dick] Janis: you should go get in a bed to yourself Janis: if he wakes up, I can tell him where you are Jimmy: I'm alright Janis: alright Jimmy: [just being fussy though so clearly isn't] Janis: you're never going to be able to sleep though Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: you're keeping me awake Jimmy: it's you 🗨 Janis: you're 😫😤 Jimmy: but not 😭😭 Janis: I can still hear you Janis: and you keep moving about because you can't get comfortable Jimmy: stop being a dickhead Janis: I'm not Janis: go get comfortable and I'll keep an eye on them both, that's nice Jimmy: how's chucking me out nice? Janis: for the aforementioned reasons Jimmy: for you that I won't be doing your head in Janis: no, so you aren't in as much fucking pain, idiot Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [angrily stomp off for a wee hen] Jimmy: [do your own to that 🛏 when she gets back] Janis: [oh the drama] Janis: thanks Jimmy: there's nowt to stop you 😴 Jimmy: crack on Janis: hardly Janis: there's two small, wriggly children Janis: don't need to be moody about it Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: don't need to go on at me now you've got what you want Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: or 🙄 at me either Janis: alright, shut up then Jimmy: you Janis: it's not my fault Jimmy: never said it were Janis: then stop taking it out on me Janis: do something about it that's actually gonna help you feel better Jimmy: I've not, I've said nowt about it Jimmy: you're the one who can't leave it out Janis: you're in a mood Jimmy: not with you, dickhead Janis: I know that Jimmy: 💭 what it were like when you fucked your ankle up Jimmy: this actually were my own fault Janis: no it ain't Janis: and I'm meant to just ignore it then, alright Janis: won't be doing that, sorry Jimmy: Bollocks, you can't go about being a massive dickhead and expect no pushback Jimmy: but it weren't this bad before Janis: it's too far Janis: you could literally be in hospital and it wouldn't be an overreaction Janis: there's no call for that Jimmy: it ain't you who decides where the line is Jimmy: or where I'll end up Janis: it's a pretty widely agreed upon line Janis: he could ask garda if he wanted to do something about you taking the car Jimmy: we've been mates for a minute, what do you know? Janis: that doesn't have nothing to do with being able to tell he took it too far this time Jimmy: you don't know fuck all about me or what he has or hasn't done Janis: I've seen the state of you, for fuck's sake Janis: I'm not saying shit about previous or implying that it means anything but you can barely breathe right now Jimmy: the state of me is right, what bit of this has owt to do with you? Janis: I'm not going to piss about with you doing stupid shit if you aren't handling your actual Janis: that's what Jimmy: piss off Janis: you Jimmy: who the fuck are you giving me ifs and buts Jimmy: you piss about with me whenever it suits you Janis: fuck this Jimmy: yeah Janis: [hear that door go] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I'll be back when I need to be Jimmy: for all you know you've woke every dickhead up and that's now Jimmy: but alright, keep giving it out like you're so bothered about the state of me and the bollocks I can't do while you leave me here on my own Jimmy: not fake at all Janis: I know it ain't Janis: and if you're gonna leave a 4 year old kid to freak out that'd be on you Janis: I don't have to stay and listen to you, who the fuck are you Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: I didn't slam the door, they're asleep Jimmy: that's alright then Jimmy: forget I said owt Jimmy: top reaction Janis: yeah 'cos you've got fuck all room to talk Janis: be better for you if I did Jimmy: I don't wanna do this Jimmy: talk about it Jimmy: have to fucking handle it or whatever it were that you said Janis: then don't talk about it Janis: it's the bare fucking minimum to not expect me to ignore that you're in pain Jimmy: and what, you think I don't know that? Jimmy: that I wouldn't do a better job of this if I could Janis: apparently, I've got no right so Jimmy: you shouldn't have to hack this an' all Janis: I don't Janis: all I was doing was saying go sleep on a proper bed Jimmy: it's just Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: weird Janis: how is it Jimmy: I said I dunno Jimmy: it's been ages since anyone bothered to say owt worth listening to like that Janis: well Janis: why fuck yourself up more Janis: that's it, it's no deeper than that Jimmy: Why not? Jimmy: that's been the question up to now Janis: if you're gonna self-harm Janis: don't do it in front of me Jimmy: you get to hold the 🔪 my dear, and when you do it'll be a pisstake if you don't go harder than that Janis: I'm not playing right now Jimmy: nor me Jimmy: what I meant were, it don't matter to me what happens to me if it only happens to me Jimmy: very catholic of me, I know Janis: i'm not interested in having no more blood on my hands Jimmy: not bleeding out as of now Jimmy: you're welcome to piss off again if I ever am Janis: 👍 Jimmy: is it? Janis: yep Jimmy: what kind of answer is that? Janis: what do you want? Jimmy: and what kind of question is that an' all? Janis: I'm not in the mood Janis: to talk to you or do this Janis: I'll be back to do my share and then we'll go back as soon as we can Jimmy: just come back now Jimmy: it's freezing Janis: I'm fine Jimmy: I won't be if I have to piss about looking for you Janis: don't Janis: I know where I am, it's not your concern Jimmy: don't make me Janis: for fuck's sake Jimmy: is right Jimmy: come back and ignore me from here Janis: don't tell me what to do Janis: I'll come back when I'm ready Jimmy: don't be a twat Jimmy: then I won't have to Janis: how far do you reckon I've got in this time Janis: I'm basically outside Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 you Jimmy: might've 🏃 anywhere Janis: it's snowing Janis: in case you'd forgotten Jimmy: that'll be why I want you to come inside Jimmy: tah for recognising it Janis: don't come near me then Jimmy: alright Janis: [show up a few minutes later] Jimmy: [we do be giving her space like she requested thankfully but we have made her a tea because it's our love language and it is cold af out there no lie] Janis: [act like you're not gonna take it for as long as you can but clearly do] Jimmy: [go to your bed sir and give it a while before you come at her again] Jimmy: What did you mean? Janis: about what? Jimmy: you said you don't wanna do this, which bit? Janis: I was talking about tonight Janis: not permanent plans Jimmy: weren't how it sounded Jimmy: you had a plan and it were to piss off back there as soon as Janis: both gotta work Janis: both got kids that don't belong to us Janis: just the obvious next step, really Jimmy: if you wanna pretend that's why, go on, obviously Janis: I'm not pretending shit Jimmy: you don't have to be a massive dickhead to keep it going just 'cause I already were Janis: obviously I don't want to spend no more time with you too Janis: why would I Jimmy: no idea Janis: there you go then Jimmy: alright then Janis: she'll be gutted Jimmy: ? Janis: Libi Jimmy: already spent ages longer here than we were going to Janis: true Jimmy: and she don't need to know that you're #overit and me Janis: makes playdates a bit awkward Jimmy: what's a bit more faking? nowt we haven't done before Janis: right Jimmy: she's less thick than most of our audience but still only a kid Janis: no need to break them up Jimmy: agreed Janis: sorted Jimmy: ✔ Janis: anything else we need to? Jimmy: like what? Janis: dunno Janis: why I asked Jimmy: it's your question, weren't me who asked it Janis: I don't ask questions I know the answer to Janis: as a rule Jimmy: if you had something in mind, say it Janis: there's loads of shit Janis: potentially Janis: mainly how we're finishing this if we are Jimmy: up to you that Jimmy: it's you who wants to Janis: no it isn't Jimmy: weren't me who said I wanna go back or that I dunno why you're worth spending time with Janis: like you've not said shit tonight Janis: and neither of those is saying I want to finish it, anyway Jimmy: what else does not wanting to spend any more time with someone mean? Janis: we've been mates for what, a minute? Janis: we were doing it before then Jimmy: so you just don't wanna be mates? Janis: not worked out so great thus far Jimmy: bit rude Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: it were going alright Jimmy: you don't need to chuck it all Jimmy: not for something that weren't about you Janis: you bighead is really showing Jimmy: how is it? Janis: 'chuck it all' Janis: I was fine before you came about, tah Jimmy: you know what I mean Janis: how you say shit matters Jimmy: how I say loads of bollocks Jimmy: you get most of it Janis: I'm dickhead lingual, I guess Jimmy: I'm sorry, alright Jimmy: for what I said when I was in pain, that load of bollocks Janis: if you never phrase it like that again Janis: alright Janis: forget about it Jimmy: deliberately will ALWAYS phrase it like that now, each time Janis: if you could not make a habit of it, be appreciated Jimmy: being a MASSIVE dickhead? bit late for that Janis: I can handle that Janis: taking shit back that you've said Janis: leave off that Jimmy: not a habit I want Jimmy: only fancy the ones that'll 💀💀💀 me which that ain't gonna if it makes you piss off out of it Janis: a deal then? Janis: deal back on, actually Jimmy: if we shake on it Janis: okay Janis: come out then Jimmy: come here then Jimmy: meant to take your advice and stay put like a good lad here 🛏 me Janis: you're awkward how and when it suits you Janis: [but does, obviously] Jimmy: [will shake your hand and pull you into a hug gal] Janis: [the most dramatic hug, definitely forgetting to be careful here soz] Jimmy: [not caring that much because we care more about the bae knowing how soz we are and how many feels we have] Janis: [likewise, the tension got too much and went wrong, as it does, and we're #shooketh] Jimmy: [straight up asking her to stay for a bit because we're in our emotions so we're just saying what we wanna say without thinking about it] Janis: [just nodding 'cos that's all we can do] Jimmy: [making room for her as if this isn't a single bed lol] Janis: [at least you'll remember to be careful again and not hug him so hard, but then you're like oh, 'cos don't want to make it a Thing™ again so 'sorry, if you think I was making it all about me'] Jimmy: [a noise like no that is not what we think because 1. the strength of how much we don't think that 2. what are words and just hugging her for the emphasis] Janis: [shrugs like it's okay but we're not gonna keep going like we don't believe him even if we lowkey don't] Jimmy: [just looking at her like ! 'I think it's more of a headfuck than you signed up for, nowt else'] Janis: [just looking like how do I even explain that that's not your fault and literally the last thing either of us should be concerned about because it does not matter, just shaking our head like nah] Jimmy: [playing with her hair cos it would've had snow on it recently because there is too much we wanna say about our feels and so much we feel like we can't say about our family situation] Janis: ['I CAN handle it' like trust me] Jimmy: ['me an' all' like same even though you lowkey can't] Janis: [soft kiss] Jimmy: [you can have some little kisses too gal like my boo loves] Janis: [just being the most soft] Jimmy: [you gotta] Janis: ['we're alright, yeah?'] Jimmy: [a nod because the emotions are still too high rn and I'm not letting you say shit thank you] Janis: [sigh of relief] Jimmy: [hugging you again cos we don't want you to leave] Janis: [you can stay here lads, the bubs will be alright and you'll hear if they ain't] Jimmy: [snuggle it's what you both need] Janis: [let 'em be for a hot sec] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: [what shall we do in the AM?] Jimmy: [make breakfast together for these bubs obvs because all the domestic bliss needed] Janis: [might have to trek to the shop to get supplies, that'll be an adventure] Jimmy: [maybe you can make them some kind of sledge because you're both crafty art hoes] Janis: [I bet there's some kind of tings in a caravan that would work, cannot think what exactly but we know the vibes, get creative] Jimmy: [I wouldn't have the first clue but you two would figure it out and you can get Cass to help she'd be into that] Janis: [as well as snowball fight and snowman making competition, which are 2 points we wanted to hit too] Jimmy: [love that and you can also make snow dogs for these bubs] Jimmy: [the question is should we let them have another night here before we send them back or is that too dangerous] Janis: [I think we should for the danger of it/to prove we can lol] Jimmy: [I'm down, just don't have another argument please] Janis: [hohaha, be good] Jimmy: [I have faith in you] Janis: [the only thing I've said you've done is baking/crafts so apart from that enjoy your snow/beach funtimes, you should also get chips for dinner, obvs] Jimmy: [yeah I'm trying to think if there's anything else they should do] Janis: [there's potential the kids have said more? because this is a whole long weekend and they don't know/care not to so, that's potentially something we need to know] Jimmy: [oh that's a good idea, is there any tea you want spilled] Janis: [hmm, she'd probably just KEEP talking about her parents like all the things she's been told about Edie specifically, so all that tea, just more than we've got out so far] Jimmy: [likewise can picture Bobby really driving home the point that he doesn't have a mum and like what he remembers about her being basically nothing so it'd be obvious they haven't seen her for ages not just since they moved] Janis: [poor babs, just bonding and JJ are here like and I OOP] Jimmy: [I hope Cass isn't around when you're spilling that tea bub cos she will be fuming] Janis: [that is potentially a thing unless he knows better by now lol] Jimmy: [this boy living his best life with his new bff deal with it Cass] Janis: [soz hen, you'll be hanging with your new mates as much as you can so we're probably fine] Jimmy: [getting all that arcade swag] Janis: [love that we're pretending we don't hear any of this clear drama lmao ly babes] Jimmy: [poor Jimothy having to just sign all this back and forth like] Janis: [I do think for a bit Libi would keep shouting like he'll hear her eventually 'cos she's only little so that'll be amusing/a time just screeching everything lowkey] Jimmy: [that's really pure babe I do stan you] Janis: [people like that's a loud child lollollol] Jimmy: [I hope you're not still shouting when you go home hun, hilarious as that would be] Janis: [mcvickers like lawd, she'll be showing them how to sign what she's learnt like just in case bobby comes round] Jimmy: [which he definitely will at some point, all the playdates forever] Janis: [fully gonna just try and take herself to Jimmy's all the time like no gal] Jimmy: [shows up at his door because they literally live that close to each other everyone like !!!???] Janis: [troublemaker baby] Jimmy: [do so love the edition of her to this lil family unit JJ are making here though, she really does add to it] Janis: [agreed, it's very cute, she'd probably have told him about how Astrid is technically her auntie but like a year younger 'cos that's wild to kids, so gonna get a sense of how messy this fam is lol] Jimmy: [and she doesn't talk either so Libi would be used to having to find ways to communicate with her too even though we know Ro be pretending there's no issue rn] Janis: [exactly dr phil, we all been knew and trying to work around it apart from ro lmao, just giving a lowdown on every auntie she has which would be amusing and probably a lowkey drag for some of y'all ladies, we know Janis and Billie are her faves] Jimmy: [I can wholeheartedly support those faves gal, Billie would always be doing the most for her and Astrid, fuck you Ro you dusty bitch, Bobby would love all this cos they lowkey have no fam] Janis: [take 'em for rides on your fancy wheelz, they'd love that, just like you can come meet them when we get back like okay JJ, all this is happening regardless, soz] Jimmy: [if she was here you'd have a bomb sledge hens she's probably built Libi and Astrid all kinds of things, Bobby will love all of Ali's animals and shit she has too, casual farm moment] Janis: [probably telling you every cats name too, poor Jimothy is gonna need a break lol] Jimmy: [unrelated but related do you think Ali would have space for any horses because I have all that Cass horse content] Janis: [I think it makes sense, I too have some gay horse content, like it wouldn't be a working farm but I think she'd have various farmyard animals just for the household] Jimmy: [yeah it made sense to me too, like your auntie vibes] Janis: [mhmm, and it could've been just land when we inherited it but she's swagged it up now she has more time/the kids aren't bubs etc] Jimmy: [Bobby just asking if they can have a kitten, Jimothy like NO] Janis: [I'm cackling, 'cos Libi like YEAH] Jimmy: [just like okay can we have a chicken/pony/donkey whatever else creatures there are, Jimothy like lawd] Janis: [just shoving the whole barn into your rental home, god bless you tiny fools] Jimmy: [and then Bobby obvs wants to phone Twix and Jimothy is just trying to distract him because we don't wanna phone Ian and he won't play along with this thank you] Janis: [distract y'all with an activity fast] Jimmy: [they could make dog treats, it's not very difficult] Janis: ]that's a good idea boo] Jimmy: [casual gift to these pups] Janis: [they'll enjoy that, kids and dogs, also can have a tea party for the toy pups lol] Jimmy: [so CUTE gonna say that Jimothy draws you a little comic strip or something about these pups kids] Jimmy: [I don't know what daily doodle you're getting today Janis, but something loved up for sure] Janis: [frankly, we're all living today hun] Jimmy: [do you wanna do this night like we did the one before with them chatting again or are we just saying it's a chill loved up vibe?] Janis: [hmm hmm hmm, let's do it, maybe we can be cute] Jimmy: [you start it then gal cos I did before] Janis: [on it sonic] Janis: 🥇🏆💪 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: come on, we bossed it Jimmy: no need to sound surprised Jimmy: just that kind of team Janis: not going to disagree Janis: 🤐 'til they 😴 aside Jimmy: don't wanna fight with you either, you're alright Janis: really? Janis: 🍀 night Jimmy: unless you desperately wanna 🥊 with me, obvs Jimmy: can't turn you down then Janis: I'm gutted, obviously Janis: but I think I'll survive Jimmy: good Jimmy: 💀💀💀 ain't happening til they're 😴 either Janis: that's a promise? Jimmy: depends Janis: ? Jimmy: do you want me to break it or keep it? Jimmy: 'cause they might not be asleep for ages Janis: 😒 Janis: should've laced the hot chocolates, you're right Jimmy: we'll have to go properly on the run if either of them 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I'm in Janis: knew you would be Janis: you can break your promise then Jimmy: round 2 ☕ coming up Janis: 😏 Janis: warn me next time you plan on being so 😍 yeah Jimmy: be loads of warnings Jimmy: never shut me up Janis: just say you aren't up to it, babe Janis: 😶 Jimmy: Why would I lie to you, girl? Janis: well you don't need to shut up on my account Jimmy: I get it, you need 🔊 Janis: needs a big word Jimmy: is it? Janis: don't you think? Jimmy: that's not an answer Janis: I know what I want Janis: you'll have to convince me on need Jimmy: alright Janis: not mad about it if you aren't Jimmy: Why wouldn't I be? Janis: it's been a pretty knackering day being the 😎 brother and translator Jimmy: *standard Jimmy: nowt if not used to all that Janis: alright, show-off Janis: you're 🥇 we get it Jimmy: you've done alright an' all, don't be 💔 Janis: don't worry Janis: not a title I'm after, I know I'm not that good Jimmy: how do you? Janis: I don't do half as much with Libi Janis: or for her Jimmy: she still reckons you're 🥇 I had to translate her going on and on about it Janis: don't act like it was a chore 😘 Jimmy: you just said it were Jimmy: make up your mind, Jules Janis: no I never Jimmy: knackering, I think it were Janis: that's looking after this lot Janis: not hyping me up Janis: that's a privilege, DUH Jimmy: so funny, you Janis: oi Jimmy: what? Jimmy: you wanted a compliment Janis: say it like you mean it, boy Jimmy: [writes it on her how he did the other day] Janis: [try not to lol 'cos we know you ticklish and 😳] Jimmy: [go over it again like look how much I mean this, soz gal] Janis: [just wriggling away like staph] Janis: you're such a pisstake Jimmy: what, you still don't believe me? Janis: I believe you Janis: don't tickle me again or I will have to get you back Janis: been warned Jimmy: [obviously does by writing how? as in how will you get me back?] Janis: ['scuse us for our lols children, I hope you're sleepy enough that this doesn't devolve into an entire group tickle fight lmao] Janis: [but the LOOK will speak for us regardless] Jimmy: [always gonna give you a LOOK back] Janis: [smile at him too, like we can't even help it] Jimmy: [of course you're getting one back too because that kind of thing is infectious but also 😍 because her smile is always cute] Janis: you're fit Jimmy: you Janis: you x2 Jimmy: you 🏆🏆🏆 Janis: you're being very giving with the 🏆s lately Jimmy: and what? Janis: maybe I think I should do more to earn 'em Jimmy: I might reckon you have Janis: I can do better Jimmy: go on then Janis: wait Jimmy: but Janis: blame them Janis: [pisstakey evils at the children] Jimmy: [just mime killing them in all the ways boy] Janis: when we get back Janis: you'll give me some alone time before you go Jimmy: that a question or an order? Janis: a ? would be polite, I guess Jimmy: don't sound like you, that Janis: cheek Jimmy: I'll give you owt you want, since you asked Janis: *nicely Jimmy: you could do better Janis: ['please' in his ear 'cos deserved after the tickling] Jimmy: [bite your lip please sir because we all know that affected you very much but the children don't need to] Janis: [pleased with ourselves dot com] Janis: better? Jimmy: it'll do for now Janis: gutted they're too young to leave in the arcade as well Jimmy: or chuck out in the snow Janis: it is melting a bit Janis: can go back tomorrow Jimmy: 💔 Janis: not saying it to 💔 now Jimmy: 🤞 I ain't gonna start 😭😭 now Janis: you'd never Janis: too 😎 Jimmy: too northern Janis: same Jimmy: SO much in common, us Janis: Does that mean we ain't star-crossed enough? 😱 Jimmy: it'll mean the #haters have to work harder at it Jimmy: Bill's gonna be chuffed to bits with that Janis: true enough Janis: if you're still here when school starts, Lucas is ready and waiting Jimmy: do you reckon he got any new ties for christmas? Janis: from who? the ex Janis: unlikely, that bitch Jimmy: 🎅 DUH Jimmy: bound to be best mates Jimmy: both into having kids on their laps Janis: ugh Janis: 🎅 gonna have snitched about us Jimmy: be about right Jimmy: fucking dickhead Janis: 💔 Janis: no presents no more lift offers Jimmy: only the full orchestra following you round Jimmy: poor baby Janis: tell me about it Janis: gonna be depressing as fuck Jimmy: can't have that Jimmy: you're my ☀ Janis: 🔫 the 🥁 for me Jimmy: what? Janis: don't orchestras have drummers? Janis: 🎹🎻 then Jimmy: bit weird that you went right for him 🎯 Janis: so #notlikeothergirls of me Jimmy: not knowing if he exists Jimmy: might be a copout of you Janis: just meant he ain't the lead singer but yeah Janis: ask Pete Jimmy: can't be, that's you Janis: well I am my own favourite person but no need to spread that about Jimmy: can't do that either, your fav's meant to be me Janis: hang on Janis: I'll post something to that effect Janis: [do] Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [have a little socials flirting sesh to further ramp up the tension that's always there] Janis: [you're always about that kids] Jimmy: ☕? Janis: if you mean tea Janis: I'll 🤮 if I have another hot chocolate Janis: and the gals aren't here to impress Jimmy: 🐕🍪? Janis: fuck off 😏 Jimmy: [IRL 😏] Janis: [just checking him out whilst he makes tea so casually] Jimmy: [will do the lingering touch when he gives it to her cos we're in a rom com] Janis: I get it, you miss work SO much Jimmy: nowt to do with missing you Janis: don't be silly Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: insensitive to suggest we deafen her too? 🤷 Jimmy: she has done every other dickhead Janis: 😂 Janis: only fair Jimmy: [mime some ways you can deafen this poor bub] Janis: [trying not to IRL 😂] Jimmy: [trying not to be 😍 af because she's the cutest] Janis: face'll get stuck like that Jimmy: already stuck as 😒 Janis: exactly Janis: don't ruin it Jimmy: know how much you're into 🥺 though Jimmy: [does it] Janis: [pinching his bottom lip between her finger and thumb like she's so 😒🙄 but there's no hiding the truth hen] Jimmy: [once again running his thumb across her bottom lip because we don't need a reason] Janis: [holding his hand but squeezing it first 'cos must] Jimmy: [drawing a ! on her hand because we get it] Janis: you're Jimmy: [drawing a really slow ? as we give her a LOOK] Janis: [shaking our head, like I can't] Jimmy: [draw a 🗨 like tell me] Janis: all things considered Janis: this has been alright Jimmy: yeah Janis: I mean it Jimmy: me an' all Janis: [looking away 'cos we're so overwhelmed and 🥰] Jimmy: [kiss her because likewise] Janis: [don't hate children] Jimmy: [we know you ship it] Janis: [reminds me, Libi probably saying something so embarrassing about 'when they get married' like gal shut up but never do] Jimmy: [about to sob because they will and you can be a bridesmaid gal even though you'll be a teen by then] Janis: [so nice, 'cos Edie wouldn't have been old enough for a proper one which is sad, at least she'd start going on about hers and Bobby's so y'all don't need to feel too awks lol] Jimmy: [break my heart boo cos yeah they would've been engaged but she was but a child still so no actual wedding for y'all] Janis: [she was only 16 for like 2 months so even if Ali had agreed] Janis: [omg hang on] Janis: [what if she did 'cos like, end of the day, make your own mistakes etc and who is she to say no 'cos Cali lmao but technically Drew could be considered to have 'parental responsibility' if he's been paying which let's say he has, it seems wishy-washy but if he was like NO, 'cos just show up to do the least last minute is such a vibe for him, I think it'd count 'cos you need both parents if you have 2] Jimmy: [I love that and we must because it was like OG Cali vibes to have an underage teen wedding moment] Janis: [like so sorry do not need to be creating drama last minute in your life but also it makes sense, because as much as it's like who tf are you, it'd be conflicting because she's only wanted a dad and for him to care this whole time so] Jimmy: [soz not soz about how happy this makes me and Libi will have that wedding video to go with all the others she has] Janis: [it just makes sense that they'd try, obviously, that Ali would say yes even if she's got the reservations she has, so yeah, anyway, that's not to do with y'all lmao I just had a thought] Jimmy: [gutted this isn't Ali's caravan cos there would've been a whole dressing up box for you bubs if it were] Janis: [you can have a fake wedding when you are home lol] Jimmy: [for now make some paper doll bride and grooms that'll keep you busy] Janis: [burn that evidence, Tess is gonna be horrified, like what's this about ANOTHER teen wedding] Jimmy: [honestly this fam do make me cackle] Janis: [not enough time has passed since ruster getting married at 18 we're all triggered lmao] Jimmy: [would Edie's be before theirs or after? I get so confused] Janis: [hmm, let me think, theirs would be about 34...which is when Libi is born, so yeah, Edie is about 15 so it's the year before, 'cos obviously they get married like RIGHT before they die in 35] Janis: [talk about a YEAR for the fam, hi I'm having a baby @ 14 and hi I'm getting married to my cousin @ 18 oh and I'm also going to get pregnant] Jimmy: [we are so wild I love us] Janis: [if anyone's kids would, it is Alison's but omg, we're shooketh, not to mention we cripple Billie, then the Junior baby drama...no one getting out unscathed] Jimmy: [and now we've got jj triggering everyone and Grace out here about to also think she's a teen mum for a hot sec] Janis: [this is why everyone chats shit about y'all, but imagine the lowkey weird guilt 'cos nothing does happen to the twins really, aside from the obvious, but it's bad enough this all happens in your fam and then everyone won't shut up about it like] Janis: [also Nancy and Ava by that extension 'cos Buster embroils himself in it all and the Chloe and James of it] Jimmy: [that's why Grace is how she is guys, this fam and shit nan ruining her life lowkey] Janis: [when you can't complain 'cos it's like um well Edie's dead and Billie is crippled for life so bye, hence Janis just does as she pleases and is a bitch to everyone 'cos call her a troublemaker and whatever then, like fine, it's better than trying to deal and act like you're #grateful and #blessed] Janis: [and that's all the drama that's yet to come out, oh guys] Jimmy: [I'm gonna go re-read what I said about Jimothy's ex on the school trip because only time she's been mentioned and maybe tone that situation down depending what I've committed to because the cali fam is a LOT] Janis: [I remember the basic vibe was pregnant and with her dad's friend but yeah, go look] Jimmy: [yeah but hopefully I haven't gone in mentioning that so far and we can be like ❌] Janis: [yeah, even if it was just a lad her own age-ish and preggo now, 'cos it may have even been 2 kids and they're only 15 now so] Jimmy: [I think we've got away with implying she's a very messy bitch who has now changed her ways at least somewhat so that's fine because I don't think I've mentioned her in any of the festive convos] Janis: [we'll let you live gal] Jimmy: [anyway we've been derailed] Janis: [truly, y'all want to settle these children down again tah] Janis: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: [get in your little den bubs] Jimmy: *🥱🥱 Jimmy: 🤞🤞 Janis: Ideal Janis: just saying, not going to their wedding Jimmy: we'll be long 💀💀💀 mate, don't worry Janis: not if she makes herself a loo roll veil and has done with it Janis: poor Bobby has had no say in the matter Jimmy: ain't seen him shake his head Janis: such a romantic Jimmy: Dunno where either of 'em get that from Janis: dread to think Jimmy: no need to 💭 about owt that isn't #goals, you're alright Janis: 🤵👰💀🤢 Jimmy: don't fancy the look of your new scale much Janis: 😏 Janis: not a question I'd even fake pop, don't be 😱 Jimmy: not even if every dickhead but me 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺?! Jimmy: so 💪🏆🥇 you Janis: even if I had fuck all, you wouldn't be getting half of it Jimmy: keep your 🐕🏃💰🔐 I get it Janis: you don't whore for those tips for nothing, yeah Jimmy: in the job description, that Janis: why else would you apply Jimmy: my ☕🎨 going unappreciated in this lifetime is an #ultimatekink Janis: of course Janis: 💔 fuels your craft Jimmy: 🖋✎🖌🔪🔧🔨🪓 Janis: 🥱 to 🤤 Jimmy: massive scale that one Janis: one time speed is impressive Janis: have it Jimmy: if you ain't bringing up either of us being 🥇 at driving Janis: that aside Janis: 🏃 too Janis: not where my 🧠 was obvs Jimmy: tah for not wanting to piss off Jimmy: mine's not on 🎨 at this very minute so I ain't after the 💔 Janis: 💀💀 Jimmy: ? or ! Janis: bit of both Janis: request and an order Jimmy: come here then Janis: [a look like dare I/do I but also a LOOK obvs] Jimmy: [giving a LOOK back always] Janis: [get snuggled in this den moment best you can without disturbing the kiddos] Jimmy: [being as sneaky as we can cos don't need these kids getting extra about your rom com life again but pulling her into his lap, injury be damned because we miss it] Janis: [missed it too and our expression would say as much] Jimmy: [it's been forever like literally pub crawl was the last time] Janis: [upsetting and rude, frankly] Jimmy: [it really is, excuse you Ian] Janis: [thank god she's skinny if tall, not gonna kill you] Jimmy: [gotta do what we gotta do cos shameless fave thing ever] Janis: [just drawing doodles all over his arm with her finger] Jimmy: [playing with her hair while she does] Janis: [we're happy and that always scares us ah] Jimmy: [likewise, oh lads] Janis: [go on your phone and see about the NYE party you aren't gonna get to go to and show him like] Jimmy: [ooh good idea boo] Janis: [are we saying it's at Mia's or did I imagine that] Jimmy: [I think we did to make it more of a thing that they don't go, because we all know Mia literally never hosts a function like it's only this all year] Janis: [so it would be such a to-do for the flat whites 'cos lord knows you've not got the reps you think you have ladies] Jimmy: [yeah exactly and we know her and Pablo are over/on the rocks so she'd be even more extra about it] Janis: [thankful we miss it tbh] Jimmy: [hard same and not just cos I love the drama] Janis: [its all the drama mick, we know it'll be a terrible party but yes, rn you can plan how you're gonna slay it if you wanna] Jimmy: Go on, how are we topping 🎄 with them? Janis: already done 😇 Janis: so it'll have to be 🌟 Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say 😈 Janis: also a possibility Janis: this party is one of the only way she has of winning + at this point Janis: how do we really ruin it for - Jimmy: where's her dad? be real hell for him, this Janis: some beach in the Caribbean Janis: he couldn't miss that to continue her punishment Janis: 💔 he don't care as much as you thought, babe Jimmy: still probably won't take much to get him back Jimmy: that lass ain't had another go at a party since we fucked up hers Janis: he is with her mother so fuck knows how he manages to have a good time Janis: assumedly it's one giant swingers convention or whatever Janis: true, I wanna do it worse though Janis: more personal, just need to 💭 how Jimmy: what I'm hearing is you want me to 💀💀💀 them for you Janis: like the sound of that Jimmy: so say it and I'll do it Janis: that's how it works, yeah Jimmy: you can have owt you're after from me, you know it works like that Janis: only if we post it Jimmy: you've got my permission to hold my 📷 while I've got the 🔪 Janis: 😍 Janis: can't promise quality Jimmy: what are you promising? Janis: you know what Jimmy: don't get more top quality than 🥇 Janis: whatever you want Janis: that's what I'll give you Jimmy: I just want Janis: go on Jimmy: [kiss her please because I'm not going to let you say something extra right now] Janis: [intense silent kisses ftw rn] Jimmy: [I do hope these children are asleep because silent is not his forte for very long] Janis: [we'll give you that, as Libi has already rinsed you lol] Jimmy: [and keeps spilling all the fam tea] Janis: [gotta let you have something lads or you'll go cray] Jimmy: [and we're ruining it all for you soon] Janis: [ugh shit nan, soz not soz you're getting floored hen] Jimmy: [honestly wish it was worse cos so deserved] Janis: [as if this is the time for you to drag up Caleb's drama, like didn't even mention he had to go and get killed, like ffs] Jimmy: [hopefully Ali will ban you from the gaff because we're all sick of your shit my love] Janis: [we were humouring you to be nice but like, no] Jimmy: [the amount of chances she's already given you through the years, dread to think tbh] Janis: [we all know she gives too many, like she never banned either Caleb or Drew from seeing their kids or being involved, she's not that bitch if she doesn't have to be] Jimmy: [likewise with Joe and Ronnie, nothing if not consistent and I love you gal] Janis: [and ro lbr] Jimmy: [the tea] Janis: [oh rosaline, this do not be about you though, again, off topic] Jimmy: [I wanna say he's thought of something to ruin this party we don't get to go to because we just wanna give the bae everything she wants but I don't know what] Janis: [we can because as it won't get to come to fruition, we can be vague lol, just kissing him even harder] Jimmy: [how intensely we're doing literally everything rn because the feels are so high] Janis: ['we need to go' when you mean to the bedroom but that just comes out that dramatically lol, obviously we're whispering 'cos if you wake up now lmao] Jimmy: [try not to fall over the obstacle course of all the stuff these children have left everywhere because we all know you're gonna kiss the whole way there because forever a cliche] Janis: [as funny as that would be, one of you is injured and the other has only just recovered so be careful tah] Jimmy: [and you'd be fuming if you got cockblocked rn, we don't need another argument happening between anyone] Janis: [Cass I hope you're out or otherwise entertained 'cos yeah] Jimmy: [maybe you're asleep too tbf because we never get any at home and you've been busy having friends and living your best life] Janis: [let's go with it, we're all content] Jimmy: [hook up to your heart's content lads we'll be sending you back in the morning] Janis: [so you'll be going back 28th, just so we know where we are] Jimmy: [thank god you can work things out properly my boo] Janis: [gives us a few days to do with what we want so that's nice] Jimmy: [is there anything else on the list or have we done it all?] Janis: [the only things we have is Twix being ill and one of Asia's sisters having a bday party, we could do Twix in this period, can't really do a party between xmas and ny even they're not that dumb] Jimmy: [we should do that bday party when she gets back and things are really awkward between them because Bobby can be like I want Libi to come with me because they thing they are in love rn] Janis: [yeah, and they could fuck with Asia and when have they needed much more than a flimsy excuse so] Jimmy: [that was my thought, an excuse to get them back together that isn't just school] Janis: [think that was the plan, we can skip to when they're back if you'd like, don't think this has been that long] Jimmy: [I know we always say that but it shouldn't have actually been that long this time lol] Janis: [we alright, also back home and separated] Janis: everyone's sufficiently sure we haven't permanently damaged the kid here so 🏆 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Ian ain't gonna give me no 🏆 Jimmy: no longer the season Janis: and his nice act was SO convincing Jimmy: IKR Janis: 🙄 if I needed acting lessons Janis: which I don't Jimmy: you're in luck there 'cause my mum'd be the one for it putting up with his bollocks for as long as she bothered Jimmy: but about as likely as him chucking out the welcome wagon for us Janis: Shame Janis: better not tell him about the wedding Janis: 😡 🤬 all 'round Jimmy: the 💰 saver of making it a double might do something about that but with how you feel about sharing Jimmy: it'd be you fuming Janis: look like we'd hired mini-mes Jimmy: bit of a mix up with yours Janis: it happens Janis: get what you pay for 🎻 Jimmy: she's spot on with matching your ☀ personality, babe Jimmy: nowt else matters Janis: low Janis: don't compare me to a toddler 😂 Jimmy: work on her volume 🤏 and no dickhead'll know the difference Janis: you're gonna talk big now I can't do nothing about it Janis: twat Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: doing my bit so you ain't 💔 missing us Janis: very thoughtful Janis: I'll be buzzing to sleep in a proper bed on my own Jimmy: just that kind of twat, me Janis: I know Janis: how many treats he given the dog then? Jimmy: come on, none of us can count that high Jimmy: need you for that Janis: I'll have to come see you then Jimmy: won't let you 😴 heard you about wanting your own bed Janis: it's not that good, honestly Janis: but you know Jimmy: sounded alright to me, might just be the no kid 💭💡 though Janis: yeah Janis: unlucky Janis: least you won't have to make a fort every night Jimmy: depends how 💔😭🎻 he gets missing her Jimmy: might have to do all sorts of bollocks Janis: 😏 Janis: tin can phone might actually work from that distance and with her volume Jimmy: dinner and tonight's crafts ✔ Janis: caravan life makes you so resourceful Jimmy: ⛺️ next? Janis: calm down bear grylls Jimmy: only answer to daddy 🐻 or baby when you INSIST on a compromise Janis: well, baby Janis: imagine the previous 2 nights, in a tent, with no room to hide Jimmy: all of it or just the bits I wanna 💭? Janis: the bits you wanna wouldn't have a lot of hope of repeating, is my point Janis: unless yours is making dog treats was your fave Jimmy: OBVS Janis: dickhead Jimmy: time of my life that were, think about it constant, no room for nowt else but 🐕🍪 Janis: yeah, you do LOVE that dog Janis: fair enough Janis: you two go on your camping holibobs Jimmy: bit rude you're not coming, but alright Janis: no room Jimmy: loads under the ⭐s girl Janis: 🤩 Janis: tents are for pussies Jimmy: it's a yeah now then? Janis: just us? Janis: and the 🐕 Janis: bit unfair to call the kids pussies but probably more unfair to make 'em rough it like that Jimmy: reckon I'll just leave the 🐕 with our kid, so he's not as 💔😭🎻 you reckon he's not 💪😎 Jimmy: it's a 👶 an' all Janis: I never slagged him off Janis: he's alright Janis: just Jimmy: just us Janis: yeah Janis: and all the ⭐s Bill knows the names of Jimmy: he'd have me name them after all the ones I've got for you Janis: why the pricks not invited Jimmy: keep it between us that we're even going Janis: 🗢🔒 Jimmy: til we get there Jimmy: 🗨🔊 then if you want Janis: *need Janis: least we get to christen Mia's bed this party Jimmy: 🤞 we find her diary an' all Janis: can put it on the site Janis: the good bits, anyway Jimmy: trash her room since she was so chuffed the last time Janis: wonder if daddy keeps anything incriminating about the house Jimmy: he'll have an office Jimmy: dickheads who spend every minute at work always do Janis: yeah, I know the sort Janis: and keeping it locked'd be too suspicious Jimmy: piss easy Jimmy: where on the scale'll 💀👑 end up if we christen his desk an' all? Janis: I'd guess 😩 🥺 😢 😭 but we'll see 'cos I know where I am Jimmy: go on Janis: guess first Jimmy: or what? Janis: I won't tell ya Janis: play the game Jimmy: you're 😳 Janis: close Janis: 🤯 you keep having such good ideas Janis: 😣 it ain't tonight Jimmy: might have a 🥇💡 for tonight if you play nicely yourself Janis: how do I do that? Jimmy: do you need me to tell you? Jimmy: done a top job of it without that Janis: might be part of the fun Jimmy: I dunno what fun we're having yet, just that Ian'll have had an easy go of it while we were gone Janis: bet it was well hard for him to act like he gave a shit you was gone for longer Janis: plenty of ways to get to the truth of it Jimmy: can't promise you'll 👀⭐'s but there'll be 🎆🎇 Janis: I'm in Jimmy: we should be out first, dunno why I'm pissing about here when he is to chuck the kids at Janis: there is loads for Bobby to tell him Jimmy: and my sister to go on about an' all Jimmy: and there's this Jimmy: [evidence of whatever carnage Twix has caused] Janis: 🙌 Janis: told you she was on side Jimmy: [evidence of how much she's wilding because they are back and she is lowkey scared of Ian] Jimmy: Dunno about that, doing my head in already, her Janis: n'awh Janis: shut up you 💘 it Jimmy: sounds and feels right fake Janis: then you're used to it Jimmy: you coming out or what? Janis: you reckon that's how Romeo got invited up the balcony mate Jimmy: no hot chocolate included in my invite, what more to do you want, Jules? Jimmy: 🌹? Janis: yeah Janis: love 💀 things Jimmy: chuck me off the balcony then Janis: don't tease me, baby Jimmy: I mean it Janis: where do you wanna meet Jimmy: where are you? Janis: still at my grandparents so Jimmy: Alright, hang on Janis: where do you wanna go Jimmy: where do you? Janis: I don't care Jimmy: it don't matter Janis: yeah Janis: it really don't Jimmy: just don't let Libi see us Janis: I'll come out Janis: she's not taking over again tah Jimmy: I'll warm you up Janis: I'm not scared, remember Jimmy: yeah Janis: but you can Jimmy: if I don't I know what will do Janis: scare me? Jimmy: 🌡 Janis: bighead 😏 Janis: not not true though Jimmy: you and your one track 🧠 sweetheart Janis: Bill ain't invited Janis: don't need to pretend Jimmy: Oi, I've got a 🎁 for you and it ain't just 🍆🎀 Janis: what you done that for Janis: not christmas no more Jimmy: 🎅's for life Jimmy: so's pissing off Ian Janis: oh, go ahead 🍾 Jimmy: [show up boy because she's not far and hand over what you've stolen from Ian's replenished stash and I'm gonna say one of the bottles has a post it stuck to it with today's doodle which is like something to do with them stargazing obvs] Janis: [take the bottle and stick the post it on his head whilst you take a swig 'did he find his car or what' 'cos we left it somewhere then dipped so] Jimmy: [stick it on her back like excuse you it's for you when you take the bottle to take your own swig and then nearly choke cos you're loling because he hasn't because I see no reason why he would have considering where they left it and he knows nothing about Janis or where she lives] Janis: [stick it on the back of your phone or something to keep it safe, shaking our head and smirking because it's funny but also 'what's your long term plan?'] Jimmy: [shrugs 'depends' like it's so casual and we don't think about how much we hate Ian constantly lol] Janis: ['yeah, depends if he takes it to the police' kicking a stone as we walk 'we'd both be seen in it on CCTV' shrugs 'you probably want to return it or make sure someone worse takes it now'] Jimmy: ['he's not that kind of dickhead' because he isn't lbr 'he can have it back before he's in work again, don't need him hanging about having a longer holiday'] Janis: [nods like good 'glad you have a plan' and a look like NEVER had one of them before lollol] Jimmy: [a look like are you because we know we're all thinking about if this plan works and he has to leave] Janis: [shrugging it off 'not getting arrested for you' and quickening our step so we're a beat ahead] Jimmy: [💔 mime before she gets ahead of us and lighting a 🚬 when she is] Janis: ['bit rude' when you're not offered one immediately] Jimmy: [pull her back a step like it was rude of you to walk off and so you can light one for her in a saucy and intimate manner] Janis: [this 😒😣 truly I shan't elaborate] Jimmy: [a look like what even though we know] Janis: [taking the bottle back like that's what] Jimmy: [writes a ? in the condensation on the bottle because we like being annoying] Janis: [rubs it out and uses said condensation to draw a cross on his forehead] Jimmy: [that's cold and ticklish so we gotta retaliate by putting our forehead to hers OBVS even though we literally could have done a million other things] Janis: [the effort of NOT kissing him right now just to prove a point] Jimmy: [when you could just kiss her but you want her to do it so you're just doing the thing where you pull her closer to you even though you're already close af] Janis: [can't even LOOK at him you're that close, just this bottle between 'em] Jimmy: [you can lick your lips though boy and you shall] Janis: [bite your own like how dare you] Jimmy: [pull her hair like how dare YOU and also to bring her even closer] Janis: [noise between a gasp and you know what] Jimmy: [getting one back always] Janis: ['why'd you have to-' but interrupting ourself to kiss him finally] Jimmy: [have an intense makeout sesh for a bit] Janis: [idk where you are randomly in the street tis the season] Jimmy: [they blatantly are and I love that for you] Janis: [always the vibe, always the mood] Jimmy: [trying to think of somewhere you could go even though neither of you actually care] Janis: [oh the places you can't go when you're a teen or lowkey ever, just chillin'] Jimmy: [would love if there was somewhere you could go 'camping' for a little moment but idk] Janis: [there's always the park but yeah literally idk where else] Jimmy: [everywhere else would probably be a trek sadly] Janis: [maybe you can go cali house way, there's ample camping space there but probably not tonight luvs] Jimmy: [put a pin in that dream] Janis: [emotions too high rn] Jimmy: [rn and forever tbh] Janis: [we're not okay but also the best we've been in forever, very confusing lmao] Jimmy: [we know he's in exactly the same boat and that's why you are #fated] Janis: [what a time] Janis: [you should probably have to go properly home at some point tonight gal] Jimmy: [can't avoid it forever we haven't moved you in yet] Janis: [and you have been gone since boxing day so your mother would kinda exist hen] Jimmy: [yeah exactly and you don't hate her as much now she's a sassy single mum so] Janis: [yeah we're not thrilled by it all but we are gonna be running away soon so we'll give you a hot sec fam] Jimmy: [you can't be together always lads it's too dangerous because of all the shit we can't let you say] Janis: [plus Junie hasn't made an appearance this year so you all have to go a bit harder than normal soz] Jimmy: [that whole shitshow is very fresh] Janis: [mhmm, it's very recent lmao, and Caleb and honestly Edie, oh the mess, god sake shit nan why] Jimmy: [we're all struggling, not to mention we said that Carly died around this time of year so Ali really doesn't need this shit nan] Janis: [sad times all round honey] Jimmy: [remind me to decide when Jimothy's mum went missing in terms of that anniversary because I've not] Janis: [noted] Janis: [enjoy that bus gal] Janis: 👋 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 🤖 Jimmy: if the driver ain't human, it ain't me you wanna be telling Janis: you with your facebook ma 👍 Janis: the driver is deffo human, can smell him from here Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: might be trying to get a lift to anywhere Janis: not quite the midnight train Jimmy: can't be bothered to wait that long Janis: let me know how anywhere is Jimmy: no need Jimmy: you can have the 👎 now Janis: oh, it is you Janis: 😒 Jimmy: who else were you after? Janis: checking you weren't 🤖 Janis: or 👵 Jimmy: 👴 Jimmy: soz to 💔 you Janis: why would that 💔 me Janis: my type, no Jimmy: you've had to piss off, for a start Janis: I'll survive Janis: have to pick up all the farmyard critters your brother ordered anyway Jimmy: tah for that Janis: you're welcome Janis: 🤠 Jimmy: 🤞 there's no room left for Ian Janis: maybe in the shed Janis: if he's lucky Jimmy: the trampoline's a good shout Janis: 🤔 might be too much fun Jimmy: with his back? Nah mate 🎻🎻 Janis: 😂 Janis: least he doesn't have the 👵 bladder Jimmy: he's welcome that we keep nicking his stash Janis: I appreciated my gift Janis: even if it weren't 🍆🎀 Jimmy: far as street corners go, didn't reckon that one were 💰💰 Janis: I weren't gonna tip you Jimmy: 👵👜💰 Janis: she was not gonna get involved Janis: watch, maybe Jimmy: that's what I said Jimmy: different street maybe Janis: well it's pretty rude you can't perform without a big audience Jimmy: never said that Janis: hmm Jimmy: weren't asking for a review either but alright Janis: not giving one don't worry Jimmy: it's the fans who'll be dead relieved Janis: that we don't hoe it up on street corners? Janis: as they weren't there with 📱s out, probably Jimmy: that and you don't reckon I'm always ready to perform Janis: I'd never say that Jimmy: you did Janis: not to the fans Jimmy: you're alright, not my own biggest one Janis: yeah right Janis: your head is the the only one to maybe rival mine in size Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: dunno which 👵 or 🤖 you're on about Janis: you aren't shy Jimmy: you got a scale for that an' all? Janis: 😶🤐😬🙃😲😁😩🤮 Janis: something like that Jimmy: 👏👏🌹 Janis: I know you're 😁 Janis: but I'll 🤐 Jimmy: you Janis: you reckon? Jimmy: duh Janis: pretty nice Janis: could've gone 😲 Jimmy: still time for you to change my mind if you're that 💔 Janis: you like calling me scared, is all Janis: I'd go for 🙃 Janis: very dead in the eyes Jimmy: 👍's a bit strong Janis: yeah, it's an exclusive list Jimmy: obvs your 👀 are on it Janis: just my eyes? Jimmy: you reckon I never answer questions, what makes you think I'll do that one? Janis: miss 100% the shots you don't take, babe Janis: worth one, like Jimmy: I get it, you miss your coach and teammates Janis: coach is a bit much for the PE teacher who oversees all the girl's teams Janis: but whatever fantasy you're having, go off Jimmy: it's your 💭💕 Janis: fuck off is it Jimmy: SUCH a #lad I only know about 🥤 shots Janis: we're pretending you're a jock now Janis: okay, catching up Janis: 📸❌ Jimmy: Bill will be fuming if we start performing Grease Janis: such a snob Janis: loves the limelight way too much, that one Jimmy: you'll have to picture me in short shorts on your own time Janis: when I'm not thinking about my teammates, I'll give it a 💭💕 Jimmy: brb 💭 about the wrestling bit of the montage 🤼💕 Janis: pervert Jimmy: 😘 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: Oi, what happened to whatever fantasy I were having, crack on? Janis: I can't help not being a lesbian Janis: you'll have to keep it in your head, won't you Jimmy: UGH fine Janis: you're such a twat Jimmy: SO complimentary today, you Janis: yeah, warn me if you want to screenshot and I'll bother Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Whatever Janis: talk to you later Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: cool Jimmy: is it? Janis: 'course Janis: I've got nothing to say about this bus, you're chatting shit Jimmy: bit rude Janis: is it? Jimmy: how isn't it? Janis: Some things my one track mind ain't interested in Jimmy: meaning what? Janis: just stop taking the piss Jimmy: alright Janis: sorry, I'm not in the mood Jimmy: What's wrong? Janis: just Janis: the lesbian shit Janis: I know you were joking but don't Jimmy: It's my homoerotic scene not yours, you're not Danny Zuko, soz girl Janis: alright, foreign exchange student Jimmy: I'm not into firing shots that'll actually wound you Jimmy: blanks are 👴 perks Janis: alright Janis: let you off then Jimmy: 🤞? Jimmy: no point you being fuming if I can't see how fit you look Janis: going home is shit Janis: know you already have Jimmy: I've not Janis: you've not? Jimmy: there's every point Ian being fuming and he won't be if I'm about to 🐕🏃 or babysit Janis: where are you gonna go Janis: for the forseeable Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: Come on Janis: I wouldn't have gone yet Janis: if you'd said Jimmy: that'll be why I didn't Janis: you're going to be bored Janis: and cold Jimmy: I'm northern Janis: now I seem like a total dick, right Jimmy: you went 'cause you had to Janis: least all the pubs are open Jimmy: 🍻 Jimmy: I'll find some 👴 mates Janis: yeah Janis: you will, right Janis: or go church, ALWAYS open, you know Jimmy: Jesus IS my BFF Janis: exactly Janis: keep you warm Jimmy: bit of 🙏'll do that Janis: ah, the homoeroticism strikes again Jimmy: nowt warmer than hell fire, babe Janis: I'll see you there still Janis: loads of ways to get in Jimmy: alright, but I only wanna see you if you recreate your angel outfit Janis: 😈 is a fallen angel Janis: he'll allow it Jimmy: chuffed to bits to know he'll be a fan Jimmy: loads of ours won't make it down Janis: they lack the imagination Janis: 💔 Jimmy: what they lack would be a massive list Jimmy: I'd bother telling you what else I like before I did them bulletpoints Janis: 🥧🍺🥔👀 Janis: I can keep up Jimmy: ain't you who's illiterate Janis: welcome for the pictures Janis: you can give me one more, for being nice Jimmy: 🚬 Janis: copout but fine Janis: add it to the list Jimmy: you never said it had to be one you didn't know Janis: didn't say it was a cheat Janis: just a bit...lazy? rude? idk Jimmy: I dunno what emoji I would do for what you smell like without making it weird 1. 👃? 2. 🐽? Janis: can't believe the emoji library has let you down like this Janis: 🐽 is cuter, less creepy, anyway Jimmy: there you go then Janis: I'll add it to the list Janis: I could just use 🚬 for you, that's what you smell like Jimmy: can't say I don't do owt to give you an easier go of it Janis: bit of a stretch to blame/gift your addiction to me but yeah Jimmy: but more romantic Janis: that is what's important here Janis: what do I smell like, now I'm worried Janis: at least you like it Jimmy: if I could narrow it down I'd have done Jimmy: you're not a vape Janis: nicest thing you've ever said to me? 🤔 Janis: 😍 🥰 😘 Jimmy: 😂 Janis: you really are great at this romance shit Jimmy: tah for not being 🍭🍨🍦🧁🍰🎂 it means loads to me an' all Janis: wouldn't be able to live with myself, tbh Jimmy: wouldn't be able to die with you Janis: 😷😷😷 Janis: ruin the ending, 👻 FUMING Jimmy: I'll tell him to take it up with 🚬 for only fucking your sense of taste Janis: there goes that sponsorship Jimmy: *🤐 Janis: I was doing great work saying how fit of a smell it was Janis: ffs Jimmy: Where? Janis: I put it on my list, duh Jimmy: said you could not that you did Janis: there you go then Jimmy: say it then Janis: I like the way you smell too Janis: and there should be a less creepy way to say it, you're right Jimmy: 🗨 can still stay on the list, not that you've even remembered it Janis: I've not forgotten it Janis: just doubt you like it as much as 🥔 for example Jimmy: what's it that I'm doing now? Jimmy: bit rude to doubt me Janis: I'm not a good conversationalist, not something I've got an ego about Jimmy: it's my list, dickhead, not yours Janis: but you're 🗨 about 🗨 to me Jimmy: and I'm 🗨  I rate it Jimmy: you don't get a say in what I like, we're not 👰💍🤵 Janis: I just don't believe you Janis: but that don't matter Jimmy: why? Janis: s'your list, like you said Jimmy: why don't you believe me? Janis: 'cos I never know what to say, I told you Jimmy: so you manage to say the right things without knowing Jimmy: that's 🏆 Janis: only when they've been written for me Jimmy: it were you who said she's a more boring version of you Jimmy: you know that's not when I mean Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: I like talking to you, I said it ages ago and I'm still going on about it now so there's something in that Jimmy: 💀💀💀🐴 Janis: alright, alright Janis: I'll believe you mean it Jimmy: that's 3 things about you you've had off the list, so I will shut up now, like Janis: I'm not giving your 2 IOUs Janis: not fair Jimmy: so just tell me now Janis: I'm 💭 Jimmy: don't hurt yourself Jimmy: I get it's WELL difficult Janis: Shut up Janis: I don't want you accusing me of copying you, is all Janis: I like your voice, that's different from 🗨 Jimmy: 🥇🎤 me Jimmy: goes without 🗨 the accent is an' all Janis: I'm not 🤤 'cos you're English Janis: make me sound like them Janis: but Janis: I like not loads of other cunts have heard it Jimmy: none of 'em have, my customer service voice isn't how I 🗨  or any other dickhead really does Janis: ✨ so special, me Jimmy: my sister and Ian don't wanna talk to me and our kid can't with 🗨 so you're basically it Jimmy: when Libi ain't shouting over you Jimmy: but don't let your head get too massive, can't have you stuck on that 🚍 Janis: 🎈📌 Janis: promise Jimmy: I'd have to swap uniforms and 🚒🪓 you out Jimmy: what a ball ache Janis: more cliche too Janis: no one actually wants to fuck the police Janis: gotta keep it niche Jimmy: go on then, is that your last ✔? Janis: that's only 2, I'm not adding your real/fake persona, soz 👮 Janis: alright, as you went 👀 I'll go 💋 Jimmy: fuming that you'd make me wanna kiss YOU when giving ME a compliment but alright Janis: we're both well kissable, that's fair to say Janis: ask the fans Jimmy: shh I'm 💭 and I don't want any of them twats popping up Janis: 😶 Janis: oops, defeats the point a bit Jimmy: you're alright, I control the 🔊 in my head, I'll put you on proper loud Janis: I'd add that to my list but then you'd owe me Janis: not very 😇 Jimmy: you'll have to be 😈 Janis: your 🔊 then Jimmy: for a start Janis: I'm not going to put my own on my list Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: there can be crossover Jimmy: I already know you like the 🔊 I can get you to, so don't worry if 🚬 were a copout that is Janis: you can't claim eyes forever Janis: or I'll just list all the good stuff now and you'll be well fucked Jimmy: not that long of a 🚍 ride Janis: contrary to what you reckon Janis: not that hard to think up the shit I like Jimmy: do it then Jimmy: I'm not 🙀🙀🙀 Janis: you might float away Janis: if you're still out Jimmy: got nowt else on or anywhere else to be Jimmy: 🎈 sounds decent enough Janis: 🤡 Jimmy: Dunno if I'm chuffed or gutted you didn't go for 🐘 Janis: trust you Jimmy: well you being a better 🤹 ain't going on the list Jimmy: fuming Janis: you're still good with your hands Janis: just different way Janis: 🖕✌️🤟 Jimmy: I Jimmy: wish you were here sounds like we're still at the 🏖 and I'm 🖋 a postcard but Janis: you can draw me one Janis: wish I had something to do that weren't wistfully staring out of windows but Jimmy: 👴 flirting Janis: they are pretty saucy, you know Jimmy: never heard anyone use saucy since before I ⚰👻 so tah for that, Judith Jimmy: racy is another one I miss 👴💔 Jimmy: #thegoodoldcourtingdays Janis: 🏹 to please Janis: and I know my audience Jimmy: 🎯 Janis: 💘 Jimmy: you had me at getting your MASSIVE ankle out Janis: oi, my ankle is perfectly normal now, don't try and trick me into sending you such a scandalous picture Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: proof's in the 📷 you set yourself up for that Janis: 😱 but my reputation! Jimmy: 🦶 size matters, my dear Janis: [obviously sends a picture with all sorts of pisstakey emojis and bants] Janis: dainty, I think you'll find Jimmy: [obviously sends a 😍 af selfie back which isn't even that pisstakey because we are feeling that rn and always] Janis: You're indecent Jimmy: can be if you like Jimmy: there's nobody else at the park Janis: how long do you want my list to be Jimmy: how long is it now? Janis: embarrassingly long Jimmy: can't have that Jimmy: needs to be so long you're past caring about 😳 Janis: what will I do when you fuck of 🎈 Jimmy: come with Janis: alright Janis: we'll work on your list some more and see Jimmy: alright Janis: your ❌🍆s to give thing makes the list easy though Janis: just FYI Jimmy: you're welcome Janis: you probably wanna avoid being that guy at the park though Janis: if I'm there, different vibe Jimmy: you heard there's no 👀 or 👂 Jimmy: you'd have to be the one reporting me Janis: I need you with me too bad to do that Janis: I don't need bars between us as well as distance, like Janis: even Bill didn't go there Jimmy: The antlers are long gone, even if the 🎵's live on in my 🧠 Jimmy: no reindeer games that involve a jailbreak, I promise Janis: Shame Janis: how are you going to top your festive #lewks? Jimmy: 🤔🤔 Jimmy: nowt but full body glitter? Janis: 😏 Janis: sounds itchy Jimmy: 💀👑 not have a pool? 💔🎻🎻 Jimmy: SUCH a letdown Janis: 💡 Janis: have to ask Janis: clog the filters right up Jimmy: hot tub'll do IF IT HAS TO but it don't have the #drama Bill's after Janis: she's definitely got one of them Janis: sti soup that it is 🤢 Jimmy: really painted a picture for me there Jimmy: might just leave the ✨ on so she knows where I've been Janis: imagine how many secretaries have been disappointed in there Janis: not to mention the lads not quite swallowed whole Janis: not going to be unnoticed, I guess Janis: shine on Jimmy: Dunno if I wanna 💭 Jimmy: more tragic than owt Bill's ever written Janis: #bonerkiller Janis: she's 💔🎻🎻 daddy could ever be anything less than 💯 as well Jimmy: 🤞 he sends her a postcard, can't wait to nick that off the fridge Janis: so hot when you're mean Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: not even started yet, baby Jimmy: didn't reckon on being chuffed to bits for her party but Janis: I know Janis: should thank us Janis: no one has ever been this buzzing Jimmy: except those lads when they realised they'd FINALLY 💀💀💀 Janis: you're special, babe Janis: not everyone likes it like you Jimmy: don't put that on your list Jimmy: makes me sound like a twat Janis: if I did it'd make me sound like a psychopath so Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: least we ain't made a list of the other dickheads we want to die Jimmy: length of it would be a nightmare Janis: and we're looking for less attention, not more Janis: school therapist can do one if she wants to chat Jimmy: bit rude she ain't introduced herself to me, been here ages struggling with this bloody paddy language barrier Janis: how dare she not want to start an inappropriate relationship with you Janis: Lucas doing all the heavy lifting for her 😤 Jimmy: am I losing my new boy ✨ or what? 😱 Janis: her cardigan collection means she's either celibate or a massive lesbian so Janis: you're still so ✨ I SWEAR Jimmy: Why not both? #dontlimityourselflove Jimmy: OH THANK GOD Janis: read that as #doityourselflove so, yeah Janis: must be what she's up to in her office, bless Jimmy: Be Lucas in detention an' all Jimmy: will have spent the hol practicing with them new ties so he's ready to go Janis: you better be here Janis: or my trauma is on your hands Jimmy: can't have that Jimmy: plays right into the hands of that gay therapist Jimmy: you don't know it weren't her spreading those rumours Janis: make sense Janis: did turn her down last time Janis: doubt she works commission for every fucked up kid she 'helps' Jimmy: I'll be here to save you, Joanne Janis: Ian don't move fast Janis: I've noticed Jimmy: he's got the 🐕 and 👶s to bring him 🍺🥧🥔 when there's no Sharon, no need to move Janis: so what's your next step Jimmy: body in the boot when I bring the car back? Janis: his or john/jane doe Jimmy: Sharons obvs Janis: duh Janis: we're framing him Janis: okay, where's she hang out Jimmy: depends Janis: when she ain't photocopying things Jimmy: she's always photocopying her tits, full time job, that Jimmy: what it depends on is which Sharon you mean Jimmy: but probably find any of them in the hair dye aisle Janis: all of 'em at once Janis: like confused blonde gazelles Janis: *blonde, with bad roots and tell-tell greys 😱 Janis: have to stack 'em up Jimmy: 😂 Janis: not a list, technically Janis: Sharon x ??? Jimmy: be weird seeing their real names in all the papers Janis: for your dad too Janis: can pin them on his cell wall Jimmy: Dunno what he calls 'em Jimmy: @ him Janis: I'm not sure I need to 💭 Jimmy: 🙀🙀🙀 Janis: bit late for the christmas card Jimmy: crack on drafting your new year's text Janis: Dear future father in law Janis: terrified Jimmy: *daddy in law Janis: 😂 Janis: even better Jimmy: do they not make new years cards? 💔 missing something if it's not 🖋🩸 Janis: you send the text before the rush hun Jimmy: oh tah, I'll make sure our kid gets on the tin can 📞 proper early Janis: yeah, little socialite will be well busy Jimmy: got a wedding to plan if nowt else Janis: don't tell him it's her 4th Jimmy: he'd never stop 😭😭 Jimmy: I'll 📞 him now, let Ian sort that Janis: nursery gets wild, what can she say Jimmy: gutted she can't come to the party 💀👑'd never survive her review Janis: 💔 Janis: have to arrange a play date Janis: 💀👑 n #2'd keel over 🤞 Jimmy: I'll stick in it the group chat Janis: make sure you make it clear there'll be kids there Janis: don't want them to die of excitement before we can do it ourselves Jimmy: 👍 Janis: not playing with them Janis: can't make me Jimmy: could but I won't Jimmy: you're my best mate, they ain't having you Janis: 😳 Janis: can I put that on the list Jimmy: do you want to? Janis: yeah Jimmy: so there's your answer Janis: what emoji means BFFs Jimmy: 🤝? 🤗? Janis: 🤝 Janis: I don't know what that other fucker is doing Jimmy: looks like when dickheads mime they're being kissed, do you know what I mean? Janis: well, we aren't THOSE kind of friends Jimmy: what sort are we? Janis: strictly 🤝 professional Janis: don't get any ideas Janis: so friendzoned Jimmy: alright Janis: 😂 Janis: is it? Jimmy: have to be now you've said, won't it? Janis: not necessarily Janis: what kind of friends do you think we are? Jimmy: I weren't planning to stick a post it on your head Janis: might help you remember my name Jimmy: I know your name, Juliet Jimmy: dunno what you're on about Janis: mhmm Janis: my mistake Jimmy: not as thick as I look, remember Janis: I know Janis: mates, remember Jimmy: 🥇🤝 Janis: ✨ Jimmy: you gonna wear them for the party an' all? Janis: couple outfit!!1 Janis: I don't know Janis: it's gonna be all LBDs and sparkles so Janis: got to do better Jimmy: question is, shopping trip or crafting session? Janis: I've had enough crafting for one holiday Jimmy: thought you were gonna say one life Janis: and 😢 you like that? Janis: not very nice Jimmy: being nice I were about to offer to take you 🛍  after work Janis: yeah? Janis: 😇 boy Jimmy: never said I'd 💰 for owt Jimmy: steady on Janis: duh Janis: don't need money Jimmy: 😈 then Janis: we can pretend Janis: you will be sick of using your customer service 🔊😁 Jimmy: already am Janis: I'll come in a bit early Janis: you can talk to me properly Jimmy: you're being too nice now Janis: that a no? Jimmy: it's a what do you want? Janis: 😈 Jimmy: go on Janis: tell me when you're off and you'll see if I turn up early or on time Jimmy: [a time] Janis: sorted Jimmy: what about about now? Janis: what could I possibly do that was 😈 now Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: you're right, no chance of topping the 🦶📷 Janis: that kind of shameless reverse psychology will always work Janis: hold on Jimmy: don't need to be a school therapist Janis: bringing her up ain't gonna get you anything 🔥 Jimmy: if you can't give me owt 🔥 when you're under it from any bollocks going, what kind of muse are you? 💔 Janis: you get what you give, dickhead Jimmy: [gives her something 🔥🔥 obvs] Janis: [more risque pic back than last time, idk the scale but one up from whatever we did before] Jimmy: alright, I take back what I said Janis: you better Jimmy: ❌ Janis: 👍 Jimmy: should've said you were so 🏆 I'd have offered to lend you my 📷 before the killing spree Janis: I prefer when you take them Jimmy: that going on the list? Janis: I don't know if I'm that comfortable with the spotlight Janis: but you make me look alright Jimmy: nowt to do with me Jimmy: how you look Janis: nah, but I don't immediately wanna hide or flip you off so Janis: take it Jimmy: gutted 🖕💕 Janis: [pic of] Janis: anything for you, dearest Jimmy: 😍😍😍😍 Jimmy: there she is Janis: not been mugged by some random slag Jimmy: bit awkward I were so into it if you were Janis: yeah, she'll be fuming if she ever finds out Jimmy: our secret Janis: fuck off Janis: supposed to say I could never get mugged 'cos I'm so 💪 Jimmy: I dunno how many fake muggers there were, mate Janis: don't matter Janis: GOD Jimmy: were he there an' all? bit rude of him not to help you out Jimmy: such a good catholic lass Janis: he helps those whole help themselves Janis: and you might be friends now but known me longer so he'll definitely let me smack you Jimmy: wouldn't stop you myself, how could I when you're THAT 💪🏆🥇 Janis: 😒 Janis: shush Jimmy: walking wounded, me Jimmy: about to turn into a ⛄ Janis: stop it Janis: focus on finding a decent pub Jimmy: without you as my sat nav? Janis: why'd you let me go dickhead Janis: I'm mad Jimmy: why'd you have to? Jimmy: there's your answer Janis: they'd all survive Janis: I don't care Jimmy: I'll live Janis: yeah Jimmy: don't be pissed off at me Jimmy: 🤗🤗🤗 Janis: do what you like, mate Jimmy: *🥺🥺🥺 Janis: you're so annoying, you know Jimmy: I'll go back when you have, it's 🥇🤝 of me or some bollocks Janis: don't go back 'til you want to Janis: just do something that ain't freezing to death, tah Janis: I get why you don't wanna be there Jimmy: never ain't an option Jimmy: and the park's nice, loads of 🏆💭 Janis: okay Janis: that's true Janis: what you can remember Jimmy: that you offering to fill in the gaps or what? Janis: I don't know what you and don't 💭 Jimmy: could just tell me what you do, for a start Janis: could do Jimmy: so? Janis: we first went there after we ruined that bitch's shit party, yeah Jimmy: with half the other dickheads who left Jimmy: for a bit Janis: right, but no one's got any stamina so then it was just us Jimmy: feels like ages ago Jimmy: but all our 🎨's still here Janis: I remember that Janis: and it pissed it down, like school trip Janis: weird how it wasn't long ago at all, actually Jimmy: 🚫🌨 Janis: not festive but Jimmy: you were 🥶🥶 any road, I remember that Jimmy: had to chuck you a jacket Janis: you insisted, I remember Janis: as per Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: don't think you do 💭 Janis: was one of the many other lads I take there, was it? Jimmy: or all them sonnets Bill's got you bothering with Janis: if that's as far as your 💭 goes Jimmy: if that's as far as my memory goes, what? Janis: you don't remember as much as I do Jimmy: never said it were Janis: go on then Jimmy: I said sorry for being 😒 and having my own personal 🌧 over my head the way I would if you were really pissed off with me now Janis: what a nightmare Janis: making you say sorry all the time Jimmy: *not enough of the time Janis: not the kind of mate I'm trying to be Jimmy: why not? Janis: bit naggy Janis: bit more stepmum energy, that Jimmy: that weren't your reaction how I remember it Jimmy: might just be that the Sharons have done a shit job at giving out the right #energy Janis: I know it weren't Janis: weren't that drunk that night, if at all Jimmy: bit busy sorting that lass out for trying to make you look a twat Janis: n trying to hop on your dick, yeah Jimmy: that's every lass Janis: no need to flex, I've heard, like Jimmy: no need to 1. make it about me when it were about you 2. call me a lightweight Janis: 1. everything is about me, far as you're concerned baby 💕 2. clearly not as your 🧠 so clear Jimmy: clearly were saying you dunno what I do or don't remember a bit ago when you reckon you barely drank owt Janis: maybe you've got a shit memory Janis: not gonna assume nothing Jimmy: 👴💔 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: what? Janis: you're being irritating again Janis: what's your point? Jimmy: how am I? Janis: I don't know, just being pedantic and saying shit you know I'm not saying Jimmy: bollocks Janis: this is what I mean Janis: what's wrong, just come out with it Jimmy: nowt's wrong with me, I dunno what you mean Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: rewind then Janis: before you were using emojis solely to chat Jimmy: before we met's a bit far, Judith Janis: well they ain't my idea Janis: 💃💅🛍😘☕🍸💖 Janis: #inspo Jimmy: I get it, you want full verses Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: [writes her a decent poem cos just that bitch] Janis: where'd you steal that from Janis: I can't find it on google Jimmy: you won't Jimmy: it's from my 🧠 Janis: just now? Jimmy: sound more surprised, dickhead Jimmy: you chucked me loads of #inspo Janis: I am, sorry, like Janis: how do you do that Jimmy: what? Janis: say such Janis: 🤯 things Jimmy: just pissing about, me Janis: it's a skill Janis: you could use it for evil Janis: if you wanted Jimmy: have used it for 💰 Jimmy: at my school before Janis: yeah? Janis: 👏 Jimmy: no dickhead's gone above 🥔 prints Jimmy: had to do something to make it less grim Janis: you and your 🎨 temperament Janis: should do it here Janis: 💰s a 💰 Jimmy: massive language barrier Jimmy: don't 🗨 paddy Janis: gutted Janis: I'd help but Janis: need emotions and shit for that Jimmy: to proofread? Janis: yeah Janis: ❓❗ me Jimmy: nowt but going over it with a green 🖋 is it? Janis: depends how 💕 these notes are gonna be Jimmy: depends how 💰 they are Janis: so you'll do homework as well, sick notes? Jimmy: homework's a bit far Jimmy: unless it's about Bill obvs Janis: obvs Janis: you should do it Janis: you piss it out easy, evidenced loads of times Jimmy: know how to piss out a website and ads an' all, tah sir Jimmy: it's like he knew Janis: what a babe Janis: guardian 😇 Janis: don't put it on 💀👑 site, be a dead giveaway Jimmy: she'd have me doing 💌 for daddy Jimmy: talk about piss easy 😍🤤🤤 Jimmy: xoxo 👻 boy Janis: keep it professional, babe Janis: she'll never pay if you sound as thirsty as you do Jimmy: she'd never pay Janis: 😏 cold dead hands Jimmy: would need your 💪 Janis: I'd LOVE to fuck her up Jimmy: not just her, any twat who's 💰 shy Janis: you reckon I'll be 😢? Jimmy: *😁 Janis: exactly Janis: ☁team Jimmy: SUCH a ☀ you Jimmy: 💔 you're not here Janis: how cold are you? Jimmy: how northern am I? Janis: stubborn* Janis: pretty damn stubborn Jimmy: *💪 Jimmy: VERY is right Janis: I won't disagree Janis: everyone's 👀 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: it's rude Jimmy: why? Janis: I can't look at you ALL the time Jimmy: can if you want Janis: can't right now Jimmy: 📷 Janis: but then the second problem becomes the first Jimmy: ? Janis: can't touch you Jimmy: you've got your perfect 💭 recall from when you did Janis: have to do Jimmy: I'll 🏃 Jimmy: race the 🚍 back Janis: very classics Janis: bit after Bill's time but he's down Jimmy: are you? Janis: you know I miss you Jimmy: not what I asked Janis: it'd keep you warm Jimmy: not for long if your mum won't have me through the door Janis: she's got loads of kids, won't notice one more Janis: you can come, if you wanna Jimmy: alright Janis: I want you too Jimmy: then I'll be there in a bit Jimmy: he'll be chuffed to have his car again Janis: yeah Janis: wanna take it for one last ride though Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: I know Janis: redundant Jimmy: I get it, you just wanna hear it from me Janis: naturally Jimmy: it's a yeah, never not a yeah to you Janis: 💀 me Jimmy: as promised Janis: s'all I want Jimmy: so slowly, so painfully Janis: shit Jimmy: if you can't feel the whole 🔪 we'll just have another go Janis: death by a thousand cuts might seem a bit ambitious Janis: but I've got trust in you Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Janis: you are Jimmy: you Janis: but you Jimmy: you heard me Jimmy: you're Janis: you're more Janis: whatever you were going to say Jimmy: that's just you Jimmy: more than I can 🗨 Janis: but you make me feel so Jimmy: I should be fuming that you make me feel owt but there's no room for bollocks like that Janis: yeah Janis: like, I should care, be careful Janis: but I don't and I can't Jimmy: fuck it Jimmy: nowt matters but this Janis: fuck it Janis: if you're alright with it, so am I Jimmy: you're all I want Janis: then I'm yours Jimmy: 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I've got no words for what that felt like Janis: but 👍 not 👎 Janis: yeah? Jimmy: like the twist of a 🔪 Jimmy: 🥇👍 Janis: good Janis: you're welcome Jimmy: I'll never get there if you keep being so Janis: It's hard being quiet when there's so much I could say to make you Janis: but I will Jimmy: it's hard being quiet Janis: you don't have to be, do you? Jimmy: not the one on a packed 🚍 but Janis: I've got loads of practice Jimmy: I'm not putting it on my list but take your 🏆 Janis: you don't have to Janis: when we get to mine, there's places we can be as loud as we want Jimmy: okay Janis: warm, comfortable places Janis: don't worry Jimmy: Oi Janis: I know, you're VERY 💪 and even more Northern Janis: but I want you to feel comfortable before I kill you Jimmy: don't be making out that owt worries me but how fucking far into the middle of nowt you live Janis: I know, it's very inconvenient Janis: miss his car, like Jimmy: why didn't I just come with you? fuck's sake Janis: same reasons I didn't stay with you Jimmy: 🥇💡 us Janis: Don't tell the fans Janis: so disappointed Jimmy: far as they know we're never apart Janis: if only, babes Jimmy: 💭🥺 Janis: I am more bored Janis: when you aren't about Jimmy: that it? Jimmy: the full scale of your feelings Janis: shh Jimmy: you're less 😳 when I'm not about Jimmy: greatest 💔 this town's ever had to go through Janis: if anyone wants to disagree I'll 🥺 at them Jimmy: What kind of dickhead would dare? It's the sort of 🎨 that ain't subjective, soz Janis: you'll have to let 'em know Jimmy: 📢 OI Janis: 😂 just like that Jimmy: know what I'm doing, me Janis: you don't need to tell me Janis: but I am going to need you to show me again, like right fucking now please Jimmy: seeing as you were so polite about it, my dear Jimmy: what can I do for you right fucking now? Janis: just Janis: tell me you feel it too Janis: how much you wish I was there, or you was here Jimmy: I feel it Jimmy: the fans aren't the only dickheads 🤞 we were together all the time Janis: not my fault everyone else is shit Jimmy: 🤏 your fault you're not but Janis: you're not even meant to be here Jimmy: 👻 barely am, it's alright Janis: no it's not Janis: but I don't care Jimmy: it is, we can just Janis: just Jimmy: stick together Janis: yeah Jimmy: 🤝 Janis: 🤝 Janis: makes sense Jimmy: good Jimmy: how much I like having you about is too much of a copout for the list Janis: when you're gone Janis: be more of a test Janis: always about now, like Jimmy: we're going together so ⚰ budge up dickhead Janis: shared enough single beds with you to manage Jimmy: might wanna stretch out a bit for the afterlife Janis: double plot?! 😱🥴 Janis: can only dream Jimmy: 👑 Janis: chuck ourselves off the same bridge, loads of room to swim about Jimmy: 🧜🏽 Janis: know I beat you so bad boxing day but it's okay Janis: can't drown once you're 💀 Jimmy: bollocks did you Jimmy: could've broken all my ribs and I'd still 🏆 Janis: the fact you've brought up your handicap speaks 🔊 Jimmy: of how 💪🥇 I am Janis: 👌 Jimmy: you're done being nice now, I get it Jimmy: 🦈 Janis: you don't like it when I'm nice really Jimmy: don't I? Janis: nah Janis: do you? Jimmy: you reckon you know my ✔ Jimmy: no need to answer Janis: if you wanna be my mate you clearly don't ✔ nice very highly Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: you were talking bollocks when going on about how nice you ALWAYS are to me Janis: by my standards Janis: too nice Janis: but by everyone else's, not winning no 😇🏆 Jimmy: 1. I give out the 🏆 2. no fucker else has any standards around here Janis: what's your verdict then Jimmy: on how nice you are or how much I rate it? Janis: both Jimmy: what's my verdict on you asking questions you know the answer to, more like Janis: 😳 you Jimmy: you Janis: tell me how nice I am, go on 😏 Jimmy: make me Janis: 🥺🥺 Jimmy: it don't work without your 👀 Janis: [🥺 selfie] Jimmy: rude Janis: no, I'm nice Jimmy: it'd be nice if you were here and I could just Janis: what would you do Jimmy: you know what Jimmy: I'm nice Janis: yeah Janis: I can say it Jimmy: might do but you can't take a compliment Janis: psh Jimmy: alright so if I 🗨 nobody's ever been this nice to me, you won't be 😳😳? Janis: maybe a 🤏 but you don't need to know Jimmy: I want to though Jimmy: your 😳 is high on my list Janis: because it makes me look so 🤓 Jimmy: it makes us even Janis: [adorable nerdiness] Jimmy: might not remember when I got on the 🚗 to tell you the story of being a twat but I do and when it happened an' all Jimmy: 😳 before it were 😎 me Jimmy: it's just something you can do, Janet 🏆👏🌹 Jimmy: to be fuming about but I'm not Janis: Then you won't be mad that I do remember Jimmy: 'course you do, you were 🙀 I were gonna fall off Janis: 'scuse me for not wanting to watch you get injured when I could have the pleasure of doing it myself Janis: not Lucas Jimmy: compared to him you're a saint Jimmy: but don't worry I won't let your shit nan know Janis: just not a watch in the cupboard type Janis: I wouldn't bring up the subject, she might assault you or something Jimmy: can't have that or any more time off work 🤐 Janis: 💔 Janis: the world needs it's caffeine and it's eyecandy Janis: can't be selfish like Jimmy: direct your 🎻🎻 @ my manager SO hard done by that I didn't do boxing day he's given me every shite shift going til we're in school Janis: what a prick Janis: what shifts will he be working, I wonder Jimmy: there you go with the questions you know the answers to, girl Jimmy: if it weren't a full time job pissing off Ian, what with him being so easy going and it taking ages to do his head in, I'd add him to the hit list an' all Janis: fair, did do that one for effect, babe Janis: they'll send him off to some over shithole and you'll have a new one in a month, s'what they do with managers, yeah Janis: not worth the 🕖 or 💪 Janis: other* Jimmy: 💔 it ain't what they do with Ian's role within his company Janis: a good sex pest is hard to come by Janis: keeping tight hold, like Jimmy: every other dickhead stopping at stealing 🖋s Jimmy: pisstake Janis: he must be good at whatever the fuck he's actually meant to be doing besides 👀🖐 Janis: try to be selective so we don't have no more famines n shit Jimmy: @iantaylor8 for the Q&A Janis: think I'm 😍 for accounts Janis: no tah Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you're gonna have to offer me something more to pretend to be 😍 for your dad, soz Jimmy: I'm alright for you not fake dating him an' all Janis: good Janis: not seeing how that would EVER make him wanna leave anyway Janis: such a delight Jimmy: when you 💔 him duh Jimmy: but it's still a no tah Janis: think of some way before resorting to that Jimmy: I'd stay before that Janis: I appreciate it Jimmy: me an' all that you don't wanna fuck my dad Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: right Janis: you don't look that alike Jimmy: I'll take that compliment Janis: you can definitely have it Jimmy: that'll be the nicest thing you've ever said to me Jimmy: even if I were about forever Janis: bit sly to challenge me to compliment you loads Janis: 🥰 you Jimmy: 😏 Janis: he's clearly just pissed he's past it, and weren't as 😎 as you to begin with Jimmy: we're all 💔🎻😭 he gave his best years to Debbie when there's loads of Sharons cracking on with doing their roots as we 🗨 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: *😢 I know Janis: yet again, SUCH a shame my ma's a natural blonde Janis: been a widow for ages, give him some tips Jimmy: for her Jimmy: what a bloody catch she's missed out on there Janis: 💔🎻😭 all over again Janis: 'tis the season Jimmy: 🤞 they've taken the mistletoe down in his office Janis: can he hang on 'til NYE Janis: such a lad, it seems unlikely Jimmy: the things that Q&A would be full of if you'd only crack on, girl Janis: I'm naturally curious, don't be rude Jimmy: 💀💀💀😼 Janis: you saw all the fuckers Janis: just more siblings Jimmy: and I had to tell our kid all their names Janis: 😏 Janis: unlucky Jimmy: you gonna stop pissing about and get fluent or what 🤓? Janis: oi Janis: give me a break, it hasn't ACTUALLY been that long, remember Jimmy: I get it, I'm no Mr Lucas 😭😭😭 Janis: who is Janis: 🏆 lifetime achievement best teacher ever Janis: anyway, I like it when you talk, remember Janis: only so much your brother and me need to 🗨 about Jimmy: I were more thinking about you pulling your weight when him and Libi 🗨 but alright Janis: how long did it take to learn it Janis: actually Janis: obviously you didn't before 👶 Jimmy: no different from learning any other, how good's your spanish? Jimmy: it's about how much you bother, have to every day Janis: makes sense, not like it's optional Janis: and my Spanish is pretty shit, Lucas don't teach it 💔 Janis: it's like Portuguese but barely know any of that either, shit nan being predictably shit Jimmy: what about 🍀? Janis: little better Janis: did offer my services in good faith earlier Jimmy: to answer your Q, still get things wrong and he's been about and deaf for ages Jimmy: but it says fluent on the CV, nowt else matters Janis: 👌 Janis: long as you got the basics down, he ain't 💀 any time soon Janis: might try it with my cousin Janis: she don't speak Jimmy: bring her on the playdate long as Libi won't be 💔 Jimmy: our kid could have a teaching 🏆 an' all Janis: her ma probably won't have that Janis: not Libi stealing my phone to come up with the excuses there Jimmy: she the one from church? Janis: 💀 crew's oldest member, yeah Jimmy: next time there's a catholic occasion, we'll steal the kid Jimmy: can't really stop us, her Janis: 🦴 as a weapon? Jimmy: better bring the 🐕 in case Janis: 💡🥇 Janis: alright, I'm down Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: you off that fucking 🚍 yet or what? Janis: how far have you even got Jimmy: if it was real 💕 you'd have got off to 🏃 an' all Jimmy: have met me in the middle Janis: thank god it's fake Janis: don't need us both aimlessly 🏃 about Janis: but I'm basically back now, so I will keep a 👀 out Jimmy: have a 🥃 if you've got owt left from that 🎁 dunno where I am Janis: put your location on so I can santa-track you Janis: know what you and 🐑 are like, you'll get well off track and well distracted Jimmy: nowt to do with your 👀 OBVS Jimmy: [does put his location on] Jimmy: Where am I then? Janis: you can compliment me when you're nearer Janis: well done for being in the right county Janis: 🤔 okay, hang on Jimmy: 🍻 Janis: I'm gonna get your dad's car and come find you Janis: may as well Jimmy: that's how lost I am 😒 Janis: that bus takes long enough Janis: I wanna see you now Jimmy: alright Janis: you didn't fuck up that horrifically Jimmy: bollocks Janis: it's even more classics that you're lost Janis: very goals Janis: really should pick you up on horse but fuck that Jimmy: fake a 🐴 when we tweet it, be alright Janis: as long as you're not feeling let down Jimmy: NEVER Janis: good Janis: so ✨ you Jimmy: I just wanna see you an' all Janis: 👀 at me long as you like Jimmy: very subtle challenge Janis: yeah, 'cos that's all I want Jimmy: need an even longer lens to stalk you from the north Jimmy: make the most of my 😍 dickhead Janis: 😒 Jimmy: what? Janis: nothing 'cept someone just got off at my stop so I might be about to be murdered Jimmy: Oi, I ain't falling for that again Jimmy: you're too 💪🏆🥇 baby, weren't that what you wanted me to say about the mugging? Janis: ugh Janis: so tough being this tough Jimmy: whoever that dickhead is can't 💀💀💀 you Jimmy: not part of the plan Janis: I'll let 'em know you said so Jimmy: 📢 OI Jimmy: my victim, piss off Janis: **fake girlfriend Jimmy: *best mate I've ever had Janis: oi Jimmy: ? Janis: meant to be scaring off weirdos, not being soft Jimmy: just claiming you, Jessica, if you wanted to be pissed on, you should've said Janis: got to draw the line somewhere Jimmy: I'll chuck you a pen Jimmy: can stab that prick with it after Janis: 🧛👅🩸 Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: don't fill up on him Janis: come on Janis: I could never get enough of you Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: Baby Janis: I don't want anyone else Jimmy: control your 🩸 lust for a bit longer, tah very much Jimmy: you can have all mine Janis: you know you've got all of mine Jimmy: hurry up and come here Janis: I am, I swear Jimmy: on what? Janis: my 👀s? Jimmy: both of them? Jimmy: if I have to craft you an eye patch I might as well fucking sign up for Pinterest Jimmy: be that mum Janis: do you have a preference? Janis: bit weird Jimmy: is it? Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: you do not Janis: you're taking the piss now Jimmy: am I? Jimmy: not telling you now, mate Janis: 😣 Jimmy: do you want me to have a favourite one? Janis: that's no sort of answer Jimmy: it's a question for you to answer, so go on Janis: I don't think you do Janis: but I wouldn't be mad if you did Jimmy: it's the one on my left Janis: I'm gonna have to stop to look Janis: and then look at yours when you get here Jimmy: no #hate to the other one Jimmy: it's just Janis: you're just Jimmy: I don't know how to explain Janis: you don't need to Janis: I get it Jimmy: might be able to get your head round it if you have a look Jimmy: no good with words, me Janis: it IS weird but I feel it too Janis: I've 👀 at you enough to have favourites and 👀 things that it feels Janis: 😳 to admit to noticing Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say you'd looked at yourself enough to have a favourite eye Janis: charming 😂 Jimmy: probably don't spread that about, babe Jimmy: I mean, I get it, if I were you'd I'd be in the mirror all the time an' all but Janis: you know what you look like Janis: #bigheadconfirmed Jimmy: I never said I don't look at myself loads in every shiny surface of the CG Jimmy: what else am I gonna 👀 @ the customers?! I'm alright for that Janis: don't blame you Janis: obvs Jimmy: so go on, you said you've got favs Janis: I am not giving you them all Janis: right now Jimmy: one for one Janis: fair enough Janis: your freckles Janis: the ones on your back, especially but all of them Jimmy: you should've said before now, I'd have chucked you a pen for them an' all Jimmy: be a bit rude of me to do it to yours Janis: I can use my hands Janis: not that I scratch with purpose or intent Jimmy: 🎨 Janis: I should 📸 Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I won't get a weird close up of your eye or owt though Janis: do what you like Janis: just leave it off the feed if it ain't #goals Jimmy: whatever we do is #goals Janis: just too good Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: alright, I'm getting near, stay still now Jimmy: 😎🚬 Jimmy: though that does sound like you're 🙀🙀 of sudden movements Janis: just mean don't keep walking and walk right past me/into the headlights tah Jimmy: not how you wanna 💀💀💀 me Jimmy: I'll leave it out Janis: you'll be glad you did Jimmy: never been a letdown, you Janis: don't need to big me up until I prove it Jimmy: I'm only saying you have, not that you don't have to keep doing it Janis: have to? Janis: 😏 Jimmy: I said what I said Janis: [turn up] Janis: get in Jimmy: [does obvs but not before opening her car door and kissing her because simply must] Janis: [pulling him into the car on your side so you're both in the driver's seat now, having a moment] Jimmy: [fully support that wherever you are rn] Jimmy: [telling her he's missed her in between kisses when he's capable of forming words that don't just come out as sounds, we've probably had to have a few attempts at it lol] Janis: [she's not going to be any better so don't you worry boy, probably just keep saying 'I' and 'you' and not finishing any sentences here] Jimmy: [it's a mood and we all know it, like he's been drinking from Ian's stash but not enough that we can run away with ourselves, he's already said a lot of feelsy shit here, we see you and your fave eye sir] Janis: [we've said a lot without saying it in a way that seems serious af but we know honey we know] Jimmy: [not even doing it deliberately so it hurts more when she runs away, the feels are just naturally high and things be progressing] Janis: [mhmm, damn you shit nan, why you gotta ruin it] Jimmy: [she can't, you'll get back to this lads and beyond it] Janis: [that's true] Janis: [for now, stay in this car as long as you wanna, then go back to the cali gaff and live your best life some more] Jimmy: [soz fam that they can't bear to be separated] Janis: [its lowkey a good thing anyway, you can take the car to work/back to Ian, at least she's at home, like we all know you'll take that] Jimmy: [we all just want you to be happy hen] Janis: [though we are suspish/triggered by you Jimothy, we're not wilding yet Jimmy: [soz about that Jimothy, Liam really did you dirty] Janis: [oh lads, the fact we'll never really know the truth of that whole situ] Jimmy: [we really did something there, I love us] Janis: [do you think anyone would watch the tapes before Libi? 'cos like Ali would wanna but wouldn't but I could make a case that Ruster MIGHT, which would be drama] Jimmy: [oooh yeah good point, I do like the idea of that drama because I am rude] Janis: ['cos they could still come away from it thinking he was just a stalker or whatever we want] Janis: [but it would potentially give some closure before Libi is old enough to watch and understand 'cos they'd clearly love each other] Jimmy: [yeah agreed, I definitely think there's a lot of potential there with what they could take away from viewing all those vids] Janis: [okay, noted for later honeybuns] Janis: [is there anything we wanna vibe for tonight] Jimmy: [I think we've done a lot and this is probably getting long] Janis: [coolio hun]