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#this is one of the dumb posts i was going to post when i was dumping art on herre but i visited home and then forgot abt it
gurugirl · 16 hours
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Baby Daddy | friends to lovers (to parents)
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Summary: After you have a one-night stand with your good friend Harry and become pregnant he doesn't know for certain that the baby is his, but he has his suspicions.
A/N: Requested! Here & Here. This was originally posted on Patreon.
Word Count: 13,995
Warning, smut, pregnancy trope (there will be talk of y/n going through her pregnancy and all that entails but not in great detail), mention of abortion, alcohol consumption, teeniest bit of angst, lying, fluff
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You stared down at the pink double lines on the stick that indicated you were pregnant. How could it be? It was a one-time thing! He’d only come inside of you once (and you’d also only had sex the once). How was it possible that he knocked you up? You shook your head and frowned as you sat down on the toilet lid and thought back to that night 7 weeks before.
~~
Harry was there for you. To console you after the gut-wrenching breakup with Joe. Which had kind of surprised you. Your roommate had been at work so you called your best friend, Erin, and she was busy already but told you she’d see you the next morning as soon as she could. You called your cousin. Voicemail. And then you called Harry, not thinking he’d even pick up. But he did – I need to go out for a drink. Joe just broke up with me. Come get drunk with me.
Harry showed up at your apartment and wrapped you in his arms and you sobbed into his armpit, which smelled really nice you thought, and when you looked up at his face to tell him as much he laughed and kissed your forehead, “You’re too adorable to cry. Come on angel. Let’s go get us a drink and talk about everything.”
One dirty martini got you yammering on and two had you sitting far too close with Harry grinning dopily. Three had you complimenting his green eyes I always thought you had the prettiest eyes I’ve ever seen… and spilling intimate details about you and Joe that no one else knew.
And four? Well… Four martinis had you pressed into the wall next to the bathrooms with Harry’s hot mouth all over yours as he confessed how he’d always wanted you. And then it had Harry calling a taxi to bring you both back to your place.
“Shhh!” You giggled as Harry collapsed on your mattress and pulled you down with him making you nearly knee him in the balls.
“You shhhh!” He pawed at your bum and then ran his lips against yours as he closed his eyes, mouth half-cocked in a smile.
You weren’t being as quiet as you should have been. Your roommate could’ve heard you and Harry and that would just have opened up a whole can of worms you weren’t willing to delve into.
See, not only did she think you were still dating Joe, you and Harry were good friends. Since grammar school. And your roommate was one of your closest friends who was also very good friends with Harry. So, keeping quiet while you were on your bed with him at 2 in the morning as you unbuttoned his jeans was imperative.
He was just trying to distract you from how upset you were about Joe. He bought you drinks and had a few of his own. He kept pulling at your lip when he’d see you start to pout, and he’d make a dumb joke or compliment you so you’d feel better. Then you two were laughing and swaying together on the dance floor to one of those popular radio songs that was kind of sexy with a slow beat, he whispered into your ear that you were cute, and then his hand found your hip and the whole world stopped.
That’s how Harry wound up in your bed pressing kisses to your neck as you both hastily undressed. That’s how he wound up between your legs, eating you out until you whined that you wanted him inside of you and so without care or thought about what could go wrong or what you were getting yourself into he slowly pushed himself in and you gasped.
“Oooh, fuck that feels good…” he breathed when he felt you wrapped around him. Every rock of his hips pulled and then pushed his cock through your walls.
He whispered to you like that all throughout. Soft and sexy. His deep voice had you tingling and his cock had you absolutely gushing. Everything about having sex with Harry was intimate and sweltering. You’d never been fucked so good in your life and even though you were still upset about your recent breakup, Harry’s dick and his dirty mouth were pulling you through the murky heartache a bit faster.
He fucked you so good you saw stars when you came. And the fact that you came in the first place was a feat in and of itself. Because Joe had never once made you come in all the time you dated him.
But it had been the best. It was just what you needed in that moment. His hands and lips on your body, his deep voice in your ear telling you how he’d always wanted to do that with you, messy hair, sloppy kisses, wet thrusts…
And when he came you told him to come inside of you and you felt every bit of that as he pumped into you, gushes of his sperm filling your insides as he kissed you softly through his orgasm while you gently ran your fingers into his hair.
All of it was so good. It could have been like a fairytale, some sort of epiphany where two friends suddenly realize they’ve been in love all along and they live happily ever after. But the problem was you were both a bit tipsy and you’d fucked without a condom. And the following morning when he ducked out before Esie woke up was the last time you two ever spoke of your drunken night.
And now here you were with a positive pregnancy test that looked up at you tauntingly.
You’d had your suspicions but hoped you were wrong. You started getting a touch queasy around 10 am while you were at work and your normal vanilla latte didn’t sit right with your tummy anymore. And then there was the exhaustion. You were so tired you were falling asleep on the couch by 8 pm every night and Esie teased you about it.
But the biggest clue was when your period didn’t come. You were regular like clockwork and you knew then but just didn’t want to admit it to yourself.
You weren’t sure what to do. You knew without a doubt it wasn’t Joe’s. You two had been having issues a month before he broke up with you and you hadn’t slept together since then. That left one option for the father and you certainly weren’t going to tell Harry about it. At least not right away. You figured he didn’t deserve to be tied down to you like that. Perhaps you’d just get an abortion, or maybe you’d have the baby and never tell anyone who the father was.
Whatever you decided, it wasn’t going to be an easy decision.
. . .
“Harry’s here,” Esie spoke when you walked into your apartment after work. She was sitting on the couch, “In the bathroom. Just wanted to let you know so you don’t have a scare when he walks out. You’ve been so jumpy lately.”
You gave her a weak smile and nodded, “Oh. Thanks.”
You kind of wished he wasn’t in the bathroom. You had to pee badly. Maybe worse than you ever had in your life. That was another thing, as the weeks drew on your bladder somehow seemed to shrink and you were constantly peeing.
The moment he opened the door you raced past him to take your turn.
“Well it’s nice to see you too, Y/n,” he laughed as you pushed the door closed and sat on the toilet in relief.
There was no time for niceties. Your bladder was about to burst. And not only that… you were in a bit of a foul mood. As nice as Harry was, you just wanted to get into your PJs and curl up with a book and ginger tea to soothe your queasy tummy. You really weren’t keen on entertaining him that evening.
When you finally joined the pair in the living room you’d already put on your comfy clothes and washed your face clean of makeup.
“Oh, you staying in for the night?” Harry spoke as you plopped down into the soft cushion.
“Yeah. Not feeling very good right now. Why? Are you guys doing something?”
Esie laughed, “Y/n’s been really forgetful lately,” she turned to look at you and tilted her head, “It’s Harry’s birthday today, Y/n. We were gonna take him out. Remember?”
You groaned and dropped your head back into the couch cushion, “Fuck. I totally forgot. I’m sorry, uh,” you looked at Harry and forced a smile, “Happy birthday.”
He shrugged, “It’s fine. Just another day. You don’t have to come if you’re not up for it, Y/n.”
You shook your head and pushed yourself from the couch to stand, “No. I’m coming. Let me just get dressed…”
And yet the other thing that was becoming… well, a thing… was that some of your clothes were a bit too tight in the waist. In the morning you could put on almost anything from your closet and it’d feel normal. But by the end of the day, your clothes had suddenly shrunk. The first pair of jeans you pulled up your legs buttoned but they were tight. So you cursed and tore them off, kicking them away before settling on leggings and a sweater.
At that point, you were around ten weeks and you had yet to go to the doctor, which you knew was bad but you weren’t sure what to do. Part of you wanted to have a baby, even if no one ever knew who the father was. But the other part of you wanted to continue on in life as you were before that night with Harry. Before you got pregnant.
Your small group of friends were already at the bar when the three of you arrived. Everyone ordered drinks and you had a water.
“Not drinking tonight?” Seth commented.
You shook your head, “Not feeling the greatest today.”
Harry sat down next to you and put an arm over your shoulder, “You didn’t have to come. I know you’re not feeling great. Stomach bug or something?”
You turned to look up at him and in that moment you felt a bit of relief. Like there was nothing to be scared of. Harry was a good guy. Someone you trusted and could rely on. Maybe having the baby wouldn’t be so bad. Especially if it turned out anything like him.
“Yeah, I think so. Just feeling blah…”
“Well thank you for being here. It wouldn’t have been the same without you,” he grinned and those damn dimples were like an elixir, soothing and restorative. Maybe it was pheromones or just being tucked under his arm so close or being given his attention, but you knew for sure that he was attractive, you’d always thought so. But now? It had morphed into some dreamy kind of residue that clung to you all the time. Made you wish you could just reach up and press your mouth to his. Tell him the truth and see what happened.
You thought about it often. That night. How ardent it was. You’d never had it like that before. You two just fit together so well. Everything slid together like it was a key into a lock. He touched you just how you craved, his warm lips were sensual, his words, his voice, his body, his laugh.
Harry stayed by your side all night. Everyone sang him happy birthday and he pinched your arm when you told him he was getting old. You couldn’t tell if that was just him being himself around you or if he was kind of flirting with you. But you brushed off that thought easily. He could have any girl he wanted and even though you sometimes wondered about the way he was looking at you, you couldn’t allow yourself to get hung up on that.
You had bigger things to worry about. Much bigger things. And just being next to him with his fingers at your shoulder, his deep raspy voice in your ear, the subtle flirting… it was in that moment that you made your decision about what you were going to do with the baby.
After you finally booked your first appointment with your doctor your decision to keep It was crazy but you wanted it. Doing the whole single-motherhood thing might be insane but you were determined. Somehow you felt a connection to the little life growing inside of you and the idea of being without it suddenly felt worse than letting your life go back to the way it was before.
It was months before anyone caught on. Before your best friend Erin figured it out. You were glad that none of your friends were observant enough to notice too soon (and that the weather had been cool enough that your wearing baggy sweaters didn’t raise any eyebrows). You felt like you needed those few months to adjust to what things were going to be like. To make a plan, to settle it within yourself that you were going to have a child and you were going to do it alone.
Well, mostly alone. You weren’t sure when or if you’d tell Harry. It might have been selfish to keep it to yourself but somehow you felt like it would mess up his life. He’d be forever stuck in your little town. Kind of like you probably would be.
“Can I ask you something,” Erin whispered as she pulled you aside.
You sighed. You’d noticed her eyeing your belly region since you arrived at her house. And on that particular day in May, it was oddly sweltering hot so you refused to put on anything that would have you sweating more than you needed to. You were at the point in your pregnancy where your comfort started to take precedence over hiding what was happening in your body. You couldn’t take it any longer. Five months pregnant and the baby was already bigger than was normal. Your doctor had made a joke that you’d have a 9 lb baby. Which didn’t sound funny to you at all.
Of course, Harry would make a massive baby. You wondered if he’d been big when he was born too.
“I know what you’re gonna say and it is exactly what it looks like,” you put your palms on both sides of your growing tummy.
Erin flitted her gaze down to your tummy and up to your face as she put her hand over her mouth, “Oh my god. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I needed time to let it sink in. Just didn’t want to deal with talking about it really. It’s embarrassing.”
Erin shook her head, “No it’s not. You know you can trust me. Right? So it’s Joe’s?”
You blinked your eyes and looked down at the grass under your sandaled feet. You’d rehearsed what you’d say to everyone but you hated not telling the whole truth, “I haven’t gotten a paternity test but…” you shrugged. Hoping that was enough. Not a lie but certainly not the whole truth.
 “Oh wow. So he knocked you up and then broke up with you? Or wait… does he not know?”
You shook your head, “No one knows. Except for you now. And the doctor of course. Oh, and my mom. That’s it.”
Erin was having a little backyard barbeque. Most of your friends would be there. You figured with your outfit, a pair of linen shorts with a stretchy waistband and a tanktop that should have been a bit breezier but instead was rather tight, people would notice. Not everyone had arrived yet but you were anticipating a coming out of sorts. It made you nervous but you couldn’t really hide it anymore.
“So no alcohol for you then,” Erin snickered as she placed two bottles of wine on the outdoor table.
“Yeah. No booze for me for a bit,” you laughed with her. It was nice to have your best friend in the loop finally. You had wanted to tell her so many times. Nearly did the moment you saw the lines on the pregnancy test. But you just never found the right time to do it and selfishly you wanted to keep it a secret a little longer before everyone found out.
And just as you assumed, everyone who came, who knew you, took note of your obviously pregnant belly. Those who knew you asked about it, while those who didn’t didn’t. Most were perfectly polite. But your thoughts and attention were elsewhere because you were most nervous to see Harry. To face him and take in his reaction.
You were in the kitchen putting buns on a platter when he finally joined you. You hadn’t really looked in his direction much when he arrived because you were too nervous to see his face when he noticed your belly.
“Hey,” his voice was soft and disarming. You turned to look at him as he walked up behind you and squeezed your shoulders, “Gonna tell me what this is all about?”
You looked down at your tummy and then pulled another bun from its package and shrugged, “Well, I’m pregnant. What more should I say?” You laughed as you glanced at him and then back down to the platter. The words felt acrid because you knew why he was asking and now you were going to have to lie to him.
“I can see that, Y/n. How far along are you?” His expression was serious. He was clearly not in the mood for jokes and you could understand why.
Was he doing mental math? He probably was. Harry was not a dumb man. His first question to ask how far along you were indicated as much.
“About 5 months.”
It was silent for a moment. You crumpled up the plastic bag and looked at him and the expression on his face was telling.
“What?”
He shook his head and leaned his hip into the counter, taking the plastic from your hand, “Is it…” he took a breath and searched your eyes, “Is the baby…?”
You shook your head, “No. It’s Joe’s. Don’t worry.”
A full-on, flat-out lie. You hadn’t planned on lying directly like that but how could you tell him the truth? You’d already dug your hole so deep, might as well keep going.
“You sure? I mean… I thought you said that you two hadn’t… like… we didn’t use protection, Y/n,” he lowered his voice.
Letting out a breath you nodded, “Don’t worry, Harry. Really. You’re not on the hook for this. Okay?”
“Yeah. Okay. Does Joe know?” You were surprised that he appeared… disappointed.
“No. Hardly anyone knows,” you laughed, “Well, after today everyone’s gonna know I guess.”
Harry carried the tray of buns outside for you. You told him you could do it. That you were on bun duty because it was one thing Erin would allow you to help with. But he insisted. In fact the rest of the afternoon he was doing lots of small things for you. Once you were seated to eat he gathered up all the sauces and brought them to you, asking which you’d like and spooning them onto your plastic plate. He refilled your cup with water every time it got low, helped you stand up when you started to get out of your chair after eating, and then brought you a cupcake when you mentioned to Erin how good they looked.
But Harry was kind of always like that. He was the sort of friend that did nice things for all of his friends. Except there was something this time. Perhaps it was just your own perception of it based on the little secret you had, but his attention was not taken for granted. You appreciated his kindness.
And before he left he pulled you to the side and hugged you into his broad chest, “Let me know if you need anything. Okay?” He cupped your face in his hands to look at you.
You nodded, “Okay. Thank you, Harry.”
. . .
Harry learned you hadn’t gotten a paternity test when he talked to Erin about you. You had made it seem like you were sure it was Joe’s but how could you be so sure? The timing was suspicious to him, especially since you told him, the night you two had sex, that Joe hadn’t touched you in over a month. And that’s kind of what put everything into motion with Harry coming on to you. He felt like when you told him that, you were laying down some kind of hint. So that part he remembered clearly.
But he remembered everything quite clearly from that night. He might have been a bit tipsy but there wasn’t a moment he’d forgotten. Like how he orgasmed inside of you. And how after he’d come you both laid together with his cock still inside of you as he gently rocked in deeper, which he was now sure had only pushed his come further into you.
And that had been so dumb. Of both of you. You asked him to come inside of you and he did without question. That was where his horny/tipsy brain let him down. But what choice did he have except to believe you when you told him the baby wasn’t his?
He wouldn’t press the issue but he wasn’t going to ignore his suspicions either. He’d push them down and choose to believe you but not without being a bit more watchful.
. . .
Once all your friends knew you were pregnant word spread a little faster than you preferred. You just hoped that it wouldn’t get back to Joe because if it did you’d have to confess that you lied and then all hell would break loose. Or that’s how it felt anyway. Maybe that was a bit dramatic of you with whole hell-breaking-loose talk but you were allowed to be dramatic!
All your life you’d done things the normal way. Under the radar. Never causing so much as a peep when you didn’t like something just so you wouldn’t offend anyone. You put up with a lot of shit from other people who didn’t take your thoughts and feelings into account.
So now things were different. It was like being pregnant had changed you. Where you once were a quiet doormat, now you were a bit louder with demands.
“Jesus. What’s gotten into you?” Erin laughed when you plopped down onto your couch after you just told her you had no desire for a baby shower and to drop it.
You put your hands on your belly, “This. I think being pregnant has like changed my brain chemistry or something. I have no patience for bullshit anymore. And a baby shower? Really, Erin? That sounds awful.”
Erin sat down next to you and put her hand on your bump, “I like the new you. And I can’t wait to meet this little one who’s giving you this new attitude.”
You laughed, “Yeah. Me too. The closer it gets the more scared I am but also really excited in a way.”
“You realize I’m throwing you a baby shower whether you say yes or not. I love your new gives-no-shits approach lately but come on, Y/n. You need things and if Joe isn’t going to pitch in then you need help from all your friends.”
You knew she wasn’t going to give up on the baby shower idea. You felt like a fraud, though. Gifts and a whole afternoon spent in your honor because you went and had sex without a condom?
“I know you’re gonna do it anyway. All I ask is that you don’t make some big announcement. I don’t want Joe to know about it or anything.”
Erin sighed, “Why don’t you tell him, Y/n? He could help you with everything too. And I know you two broke up but it’s something to think about ya know? Like he could pay child support and you’d have the father listed on the birth certificate and it’s good for like, health stuff too. Like anything that could be hereditary from Joe?”
Pursing your lips you looked toward the window. You’d already decided on telling Harry at some point. You’d gotten past the whole single mom, doing it on her own BS when the doctor told you the same thing. How important it could be to know the baby’s father’s medical history. You just hadn’t figured out when to tell him yet. Timing would be important but the shame of having lied all along was really what was keeping you from telling him.
“You’re right. The doctor told me the same thing. But, it’s not that easy…” your pulse increased as you looked at Erin. You didn’t know why but you felt the need to tell her everything. To come right out and just tell her. She was your best friend after all. You could trust her not to say anything.
“I know it’s not easy but come on… he’s gonna figure it out at some point. He was just at Seth’s house the other night when I went to pick up Marcy. Seth’s cousin knows you’re pregnant and so do half of his friends and if Seth finds out you know Joe will find out.”
Sighing you leaned your head back into the couch cushion behind you, “It’s not Joe’s.”
Erin was silent for a moment and then you felt the couch shift as she angled herself to face you, “Okay. And do you know who the father is?”
Nodding you turned your head to look at her, “Don’t say anything to anyone. But it’s… Harry.”
Her eyes nearly bulged from her head as she stood up and paced in front of the couch, “Harry Styles? Our Harry?” She stopped and looked at you, shock on her face.
“Yes. That Harry.”
She continued pacing, “How? When did… but…”
“It was just one night. Right after Joe broke up with me we went out and he came back home with me and then that was it. Got knocked up from just the once.”
“Holy shit… Okay… Okay…” Erin sat down and took your hand into hers, “Harry’s a really good man. I just know he’d be supportive and loving with the baby. I actually think Harry being the father is way better. This is actually,” she puffed out a laugh, “This good news! Oh my god, this is… and I think you two would make the best couple. He’s always had a crush on you and–“
“Stop,” you put your hand up, “One thing at a time. Okay? I’m not thinking about any kind of romantic relationship right now. I’m just concerned with getting this thing out of me healthily and figuring out how to tell Harry in the first place.”
“So you’re gonna tell him. Okay… Listen… I’m not going to tell anyone. You already know that. But this, Y/n… this is good. Okay? Harry and you? You don’t need to be thinking about the future of your relationship with him right now but you’re set, girl. If Harry’s the dad? But you better figure out how to tell him soon. He’s been talking to some chick he works with. I don’t think it’s anything serious but still…”
Rolling your eyes you shook your head, “I’ll figure out when to tell him. It’ll be when I’m ready. And if he starts seeing this other chick then good for him. He deserves happiness.”
Erin scoffed and rolled her eyes, “Yeah sure.”
. . .
You didn’t realize how much it would affect you seeing Harry with someone else. The girl was cute. She was nice and her perfume smelled pleasant (which was good because you were very sensitive to smell as of late and most scents made you want to puke).
Harry had stopped by at Erin’s to drop off a few things he picked up for your upcoming baby shower while you were there and the girl was with him because they were on their way to a movie. A date.
The introduction was nice enough but you didn’t like it all. You hadn’t expected to feel the way you were. And it was your fault in a way. Maybe things would be different if you’d just told Harry already.
“How’s our baby, doing?” Harry put his palm on your stomach and you could have burst into tears. The “our” baby was innocent. Your tight-knit friend group all called the baby our baby, but somehow in that moment it just hit different.
Swallowing down your emotions you put on a smile, “It’s good! Super healthy. Just another month and a half and I’ll get to meet the baby. It’s gonna be big, though. Doctor says it might be close to 9 lbs.”
Harry blinked and slid his palm down the thin material of your flowy maternity shirt over the bump and looked at you as if he was trying to speak paragraphs to you in a glance, “Wow. That’s… big. And how’s the mommy? Are you feeling okay?”
You nodded and looked from the girl who was standing next to Harry looking at your massive tummy and then back up to Harry, “Feeling tired. And this thing is huge and heavy. But we’re healthy, so…” you shrugged and Harry removed his hand from your tummy but he kept his eyes on yours.
“I’m glad you’re healthy. That’s the most important thing. Oh, and here,” he walked toward the table where he placed the shopping bags and pulled out a box of your favorite pistachio and vanilla cookies from the bakery you loved. “Made an extra stop to pick these up for you.”
Erin and Harry’s girlfriend or whatever she was stood and watched as your eyes teared up and Harry handed you the small container. He had been nothing but sweet and helpful to you during your pregnancy and all the regret you already had about not telling him came pouring out of your eyes in that moment. It was ridiculous.
“Hey, what’s wrong? You still like these yeah?”
You nodded as Harry pulled you into his arms, though the big bump in your tummy made it hard to have a proper hug, “I’m fine. Just emotional some days. Thank you, Harry. This is so so kind of you.”
You hated that this chick Harry was with had seen that. Hated that you were so sensitive and that Harry was with someone else. Hated that you looked like a bloated beluga and that your thighs were aching for no fucking reason. You hated that despite the gross feeling in your gut you wanted to devour the cookies like a starved madwoman.
“You want me to stay? Want to talk?” His deep voice in your ear as he rubbed your back was calming. And if you were a sliver more selfish than you already were you’d say yes and have him stay with you and skip the date entirely and you’d revel in watching the disappointment on his date’s face when he told her he was choosing you over her. Even though she was nice, that would have still felt really good.
But you wouldn’t do that. Wouldn’t interrupt Harry’s plans that way. Looking up at him you shook your head, “No. That’s okay.”
The look on his face slowly transitioned from strangely hopeful and soulful to something like defeat. Disheartened. You pulled at his hand and smiled before mouthing thank you.
When Harry and the girl left Erin sighed, “I don’t mean to be nosy or push you or make you feel like you’re doing something wrong but I really think you should tell him and do it soon. Did you see the way he was looking at you? Y/n… I know you saw that. He’d drop everything for you. He’d break up with that girl and I guarantee the moment you tell him it’s his he’d do anything. That man is smitten with you.”
You shook your head and took a bite of a cookie, “No he’s not. Look at me? I’m a mess. Everything is puffy, I can hardly move… look at this!” You lifted your hand up to show her your swollen fingers.
Erin laughed and pushed her fingers through yours, “Beautiful. You’re gorgeous. Glowing. An entire life is being grown right here,” she put her hand over your tummy, “And Harry Styles is in love with you all while thinking this baby is someone else’s. Mark my words, Y/n. The moment you tell him is the moment you’re gonna learn how far gone he is for you and how he’d do anything to make you happy.”
You laughed and shook your head but you did wonder. Because Harry had been a certain way with you since the day he learned you were pregnant. His doting and his gentleness were not something you could ignore.
. . .
The morning of the baby shower had been good. Your mother took you to get breakfast and you both walked together along the path near the lake for some exercise and fresh air. The only two people in the world who knew about Harry being the father were your mother and Erin. Your mother had met Harry before and she was quite fond of him. Everyone was fond of Harry, though.
“I just don’t understand why you haven’t told him, Y/n.”
“Well, it’s because I lied about it, Mom. I wasn’t thinking clearly at the beginning of the pregnancy. I don’t know if it was hormones or scrambled brains or what… Now I’m sort of regretting it but I’ll figure it out. He’ll know soon. I just need to figure out how to break it to him.”
“How to break it to him? Well, maybe something like… Hey, you. You knocked me up. This baby is actually yours and not Joe’s. Sorry for the inconvenience but that’s the deal.” Your mom laughed, mimicking your voice.
You laughed and shook your head, “Yeah it’ll probably be something like that. I just hate that I lied about it. Because I’m not a liar. I thought I was doing it to protect myself… I don’t even really know what I was thinking but I will tell him. Soon.”
When you arrived at your apartment most everyone was already there. Including Harry. The place was filled with little decorations and baby things. A table overflowing with presents and some sat on the floor next to the table. Another spot where there was food.
You didn’t know what the sex was going to be and didn’t want to know until the moment it was born so the decorations were neutral colors with a few splashes of blue and pink here and there. It was cute.
“There you are…” Harry swooped in and took the tray of goodies your mom was holding and he kissed her cheek, “Nice to see you! How have you been?”
You and your mother followed him to the kitchen, your mother giving you a knowing glance before she responded, “Just great. Everything is pretty much the same as it was since I last saw you, except now my baby is pregnant.”
Harry chuckled and once the tray was placed on the counter he draped his arm over your shoulder and hugged you, “And how are you?”
He always asked how you were. Always offered to help. Often would buy you random things he thought might make your pregnancy easier. Creams, pads for your back, nausea bands, teas…
“I’m good. Closer and closer. How are you, Harry?”
Soft pink lips turned up as he kept his sparkling green eyes on you, “Good. Happier now that you’re here.”
You rolled your eyes at him and just as you were about to retort Erin popped into the kitchen, “The lady of the hour! Come! I have to show you something!”
The baby shower was relatively fun. But it was tiring. It lasted longer than you had anticipated and you tried not to complain. Opening every present was a bore. A full-on snooze fest. Most things were just practical stuff you’d need. Lotions and powders, things to make bath time easier and safer, diapers, bottles, cleaning things for said bottles, a special baby food blender, onesies, socks, bibs, blankets… But you didn’t complain because you didn’t want to seem ungrateful.
It was a sea of pastel yellow, green, creamy whites… The cake was good, though. And finally, when everyone started to leave you felt like you could breathe. Having a small apartment packed full of people felt like you were a zoo animal on display. But the remainder were welcome and you appreciated that some straggled behind to help clean up.
Your mother left once all the dishes were clean and put away and then it was just you, Erin, your roommate, Harry, and two others who were helping put things away so you didn’t have to lift a finger.
You were sitting on the couch with your legs propped up on a pillow when Harry sat down by your feet and pulled them into his lap.
“Hey!” You laughed and started to pull away from him but the moment his thumb mushed into the tender part of your sole you gave in and relaxed your limbs.
“That was easy. Thought you’d gripe a bit more. Feels good yeah?”
You nodded, “It does feel good, actually. My feet are so swollen, though. Sorry.”
Harry continued kneading at your feet, rubbing sore spots and you were working to hold back your moans, “Stop it. Your feet look fine. This is normal anyway isn’t it?”
“Well, yeah but still. Even my fingers are puffy,” you laughed.
Erin sat down on the chair near the TV and smirked at you, “Y/n doesn’t believe it when I tell her she’s glowing. She’s sexy as a pregnant woman isn’t she Har?”
You narrowed your gaze at Erin in warning.
Harry laughed, his eyes on yours, “I think she’s just as lovely as always. Pregnancy definitely suits her.”
Everyone else joined in the living room and you moved your feet from Harry with a quick thank you as you felt the baby kick. You put your hand on your tummy and gasped, “It’s kicking!”
“Can I touch?” Your roommate asked as she moved from her spot to make her way to you.
“Yeah. Go ahead,” you smiled and showed her where to put her hand. But there was no movement. You poked at the spot and groaned, “Ahhh… a tease, this one.”
Erin walked over and put her hand on your tummy. Nothing. The baby didn’t budge. It often did this. Whenever you’d feel it move it stopped moving for anyone else. Not even your own mother had the chance to feel the baby kick in your belly.
Your two other friends also tested their luck, “It’s always like this. I’m the only one who’s ever gotten to feel it kick. I don’t know what it is.”
“You try,” Erin looked at Harry as she backed away to sit.
Harry licked his lips, “I mean… only if it’s okay. I don’t want to–“
“It’s fine. If you want to it’s okay. Really. Probably won’t move but ya know. Why not?” You laughed.
Harry scooted himself across the couch to sit right next to you as he placed his hand over your tummy where you pointed.
“Hey there, little one. Uncle Harry is here saying hello,” you watched Harry as he spoke in a soft tone. His deep voice had your skin prickling and your heart rate increasing. No one else really spoke to the baby and somehow seeing Harry do it drew the smallest bit of emotion up in your chest as he looked into your eyes and slid his thumb next to yours.
But then it kicked. The baby kicked and kicked again. Harry laughed and placed his other palm over your tummy so he was holding you with both hands and the little sucker was doing acrobatics all of a sudden.
“It’s never done that…” you spoke as you laid your palm over the space, “For anyone but me.”
“It’s kicking for me,” he grinned and his eyes softened as he cooed in a hushed voice looking down at his hands, “Hey baby. We can’t wait to meet you.”
“Maybe it’s your voice,” you whispered and Harry looked like he was in awe. Eyes twinkling with emotion.
“I feel so special.”
“Can I try again?” Erin stood over you two. Harry moved his hands away and the moment her palm took over the place Harry’s was the baby stopped moving again.
You laughed and felt around, jabbing gently into your tummy, “I don’t know why it’s doing this. Come on little human. Kick for Erin…”
You caught Harry’s gaze on yours. He had a small smile on his mouth and his cheeks were flushed.
Erin shook her head, “Ahh it’s okay. Now’s not my time.”
“We should probably get going.” The pair who arrived together both stood and said their goodbyes. Harry got up and went into the kitchen as you walked your friends to the door and thanked them for their help.
“Go talk to him,” Erin whispered in your ear.
“What?” You scrunched your face in confusion.
“Harry. Go talk to him. He’s in the kitchen and I think he’s upset or something.”
“Why would he be upset?”
Erin raised her brows at you and looked toward the kitchen and mouthed, “Just go.”
Sighing you waddled toward the kitchen and noticed Harry had his palms flat on the countertop as he looked downward at the platter of cupcakes silently.
“Hey…” you gently put your hand on his tricep, “Are you okay?”
He looked down at you and nodded, “I’m fine. Just… needed a minute. Felt like it was nonstop today ya know?” He pushed himself from the counter and let out a forced laugh.
“Okay. You seemed upset just then. Wanted to make sure nothing was wrong.”
Harry opened his mouth and then closed it before he shook his head, “I’m fine. Thank you.”
“Oh!” You reached for his hand and pulled over your tummy again.
The kicking was nonstop as long as Harry’s hand was on your tummy, “Hi there. You wanted to say hello again, didn’t you? I am flattered you seem to like me so much. I’m your favorite, aren’t I? Your secret’s safe with me little one,” he bent closer to your tummy to speak to the baby.
If he didn’t give you butterflies before, well that whole exchange certainly did. You were aware your hormones were going bonkers too. Just seeing Harry had put you into overdrive, though no one would ever know it. Who knew pregnant women got so horny? Your doctor told you it could happen but looking at his big hands on your bump, the soft smile on his face, the look of something that could easily be mistaken for fondness in his eyes had your head spinning.
You laughed when Harry looked up at you and stood back to his full height, “What? Baby likes me more than the others. Pretty sure we’re gonna be best buds.”
A small breath fell from your lips at the thought. At Harry thinking it.
“I sure hope so. Just a little over a month. Doctor says could be sooner due to the size.”
“Yeah. You said on track to be a big baby,” he smiled and looked down at his hand on your bump and then back at you, “Will you…” he cleared his throat, “Please let me know if there’s anything you need or want. I can, you know, help. And… if you go into labor I’d like to know. I’m sure you already have a plan with your mother and Erin but…” he trailed off his words as you put your hand over his.
“I’ll let you know if there’s anything. You’ve already been so helpful, Harry. I’m beyond grateful for you. And when I go into labor I’ll make sure someone calls you.”
He nodded, “Thank you.”
There was something about that moment. How tender and vulnerable it was. Your eyes locked and his hand on your tummy with the baby kicking inside. His baby. And it felt like he knew it too. Like he could see through your bullshit and he was just waiting for you to tell him the truth. Praying you’d spit it out once and for all.
And that had stuck with you. The moment the baby had kicked for him was like a signal for you. Some kind of omen or something (not that you believed in those kinds of things). It was time to tell him.
“You wanna come over tomorrow and help me set up the crib?”
. . .
You slept like shit. Which wasn’t too outside of the norm since Harry’d gotten you knocked up. His massive baby was pushing on all your organs and made it hard to get comfortable in bed at night. And just when you’d start to doze off you’d need to pee or there was a sharp pain or your leg would cramp up.
In short, by the time Harry arrived the following day to help you set up the crib, you were in a terrible mood. You were still going to tell him the truth but you were unsure of how it would all go down now that your mood was spoiled. Where you’d been so hopeful before, now you were doubtful. What if he was repulsed?
You had wanted time alone with him. Your roommate was out so it would be perfect. It felt like it would be better to tell him when no one else was around.
He brought croissants and jam and your favorite cookies. The moment you saw him with the bakery box in hand and a warm smile on his pink lips your bad mood was suddenly lifted slightly. Just the sight of him was a breath of fresh air.
When he sat the box down he pulled you in for a hug and kissed your forehead, “How are you feeling today?”
You rolled your eyes because he was too perfect. Too sweet.
“I’m… well, I’m tired. Didn’t sleep much. This thing makes it hard to get comfortable and my back aches. But… we’ll survive.” You laughed it off.
Harry’s brows pinched together, “Okay. Let’s get you off your feet then. Here,” he pulled you into your bedroom where the unopened crib box was sitting. He gestured for you to sit down on your bed, “Sit.” He helped you scoot into the headboard and stuffed a pillow behind your back before he turned, “Let me grab the box in the kitchen.”
You watched him quickly exit your room and looked around yourself. He had no idea what kind of bomb you were about to drop on him. Your nerves were all over the place. You were sure that was part of why you didn’t sleep well the night before. You couldn’t put all the blame on Harry’s baby.
When he returned to the room with the pastry box and two plates, “Cookie first? Or croissant with jam?”
“Mmm…” you looked into the box, “… cookie I think first.”
“Cookie for mama… here you go,” he handed you a plate with a cookie and you huffed a laugh. God, just hearing him say that had your toes tingling.
Harry began to remove the parts from the box and handed you the instructions to read over, “Okay. Read to me what I need to do first.” He took a bite of a croissant.
“Attach small end panels A to posts D with lock washers and connector bolts. Here,” you turned it so he could see the figure in the picture with the parts and he began to put sections together as you read off the instructions.
You wound up getting up to help him even though he told you to stay put. You insisted anyway and handed him the small tools as you read the directions.
“This is so much more work than I thought it’d be,” he laughed as he tilted the nearly put-together crib upright.
You covered your mouth and looked at its frame. It was almost as if none of what was happening was real until you saw the crib there, at the foot of your bed with Harry’s hand on one of the corner posts.
He reached out to rub your arm, “You okay?”
Once again, your emotions and hormones were wrecking you. You sat down and Harry sat next to you.
Sniffing you nodded and laughed, “I’m okay. I just can’t believe there’s a crib in my room for a baby who’s going to be here sooner than I’m ready for.”
“I know it’s wild. I never really imagined what it’d be like to put a crib together before.”
You smiled sheepishly and looked down at your tummy. You wondered if the correlation between Harry being near you and making your heart race had something to do with the baby always kicking only for him. Especially when you looked into his eyes and he was looking at you like that.
“So, uh…” you laughed, “You still seeing that one girl from work?”
Harry cocked his head and looked at you with an amused smile, “Maybe. Why? You never once asked about girls I’m dating before.”
“Oh… I was just curious. You don’t have to answer or anything,” you frowned and moved to stand but your movement lacked grace and you only fell back into the bed and Harry put his hand on your back.
“I was teasing. You can ask me anything, Y/n. But it’s just casual. Haven’t been out with her in a couple weeks. Might not see her again outside of work.”
“Why not? She seemed really nice,” you were thrilled by the news but tried not to let just how thrilled you were show.
Harry laughed through his nose as he kept his eyes on yours, “Just cause. Kind of felt like I was leading her on a little. Never really was that into her.”
You nodded and pursed your lips to act casual but Harry’s hand was still on your back and your roommate was coming home soon and you needed to tell him. It felt like your room was closing in around you. It was time.
You inhaled deeply and swallowed, “Um… I need to tell you something. It’s kind of big and…” another deep breath and the feel of Harry’s hand soothingly rubbing your back that felt like he already knew what you were going to say as if he were coaxing it out of you gently. “Uh…”
“It’s okay. Take your time.”
You smiled at him before closing your eyes and blurting out the words, “Joe’s not the father.”
Harry’s soft caresses slowed down as he pushed his hand upward to your shoulder, “I kind of had a feeling it wasn’t his.”
Popping your eyes open you looked at Harry, “You… didn’t think it was Joe’s?”
Harry shook his head, “Felt like you weren’t telling me everything. Are you gonna tell me who the father is then?” He raised his brows. He knew. He already knew. But he needed you to say it. To tell him. You could see it in his expression that he knew.
“Well, that kind of just leaves one person, doesn’t it?”
“I don’t know. You tell me, Y/n.” He wasn’t going to make this easy but of course you deserved that.
Pushing out a breath you nodded and put your hand on your tummy, “It’s… you.”
Harry nodded his head as he kept his eyes on yours. You swallowed thickly when he removed his hand from your shoulder and stood up before running his fingers into his hair and began to laugh.
You didn’t know what was going through his head but his reaction was… well it wasn’t what you imagined and now you were wondering if you should have just kept it all in. Never told him or anyone the truth. Because letting another full human being into the mix was daunting. Harry had his own life and hobbies and he was dating and he was in the process of looking for a house to buy and he’d recently talked about getting a dog…
You started to spiral in your thoughts, regretting that you told him at all. Feeling like you’d just made a grave error when you felt Harry’s arm slide behind your back, “Hey… come on. Don’t cry…”
It hadn’t even dawned on you that you were crying. You were too overwhelmed by the feeling of rejection and embarrassment to take note that tears were pouring out of your eyes.
“Sorry!” You squeaked and hid your face in your arm, turning away from him.
Harry pulled you in closer and smushed his lips to your temple, “Shh…”
You gasped to catch your breath and felt the warm singe of embarrassment still frothing over your skin. The tears weren’t helping anything because now you just looked like a lunatic. Unable to form words or look him in the eyes. You’d even put on mascara before he came over so you’d look cuter when you told him he was the baby daddy.
“We’re gonna have a baby,” he spoke against your hair and ran his hand up and down your arm gently.
You laughed and buried your face into his clavicle.
“Can I tell you something, Y/n?”
You nodded, and a muffled okay came from your mouth as you kept your face tucked away.
“Can you look at me first?”
“Harry my face is gross. You don’t want to see this…”
“Nothing about you is gross. You’re breathtaking. Please look at me.”
Another puffed laugh fell from your mouth. Breathtaking. That was a bit of an exaggeration.
You slowly pulled your face away from his chest and tilted your head up to look at him. The grin on his face stretched upward and he ran his thumbs under your eyes, “Look at you. Nothing gross here. Bit of makeup down the face. You don’t need this stuff anyway,” he wiped the smudged mascara and you brought a hand up to wipe with him.
“Sorry… I should know better than to put mascara on these days. Everything makes me cry,” you ran your fingers under the delicate skin of your eyes as Harry continued wiping at your cheeks.
“It’s an emotional thing. All this. Good to get a cry in here and there.”
You laughed and sniffled. Harry didn’t let his pupils stray from yours.
“So, listen…” he inhaled, “I want to be with you. I have wanted that. When I learned you and Joe broke up I thought that was my chance. But then we slept together and I thought you regretted it. You kind of acted funny around me for a bit after that so I backed off. But really, I wanted to scoop you up and make you mine. Figured maybe you just needed time to get over Joe.”
You were stunned. You blinked your eyes and shook your head, “You… I thought…” A breath fell from your lips.
“It’s okay if you don’t want me like that. But I do want to be part of this,” he placed his hand on your pregnant belly, “This is ours. I want to help. I want to do everything I can to be there for you.”
“You want to be with me? Like…” You blinked in disbelief.
“Yes. Like I’m in love with you.”
He’d just blurted it out so casually. As if you weren’t in a delicate state and that sentence couldn’t send you to your grave. As if those words wouldn’t have your head spinning and your heart raging behind your ribcage. As if him loving you was the most obvious thing.
“Wha– you… I’m surprised. I… love?”
“I’m sorry. Maybe I should have waited for that one. But you did just tell me I’m the dad so… call it even,” he laughed.
“You’re laughing? Harry… this is…” you started to tear up again as you pushed at his chest. He’d waited all this time to admit he was in love with you and somehow it just seemed unfair, “You should have told me. This would have all been so different.”
“And you should have told me, Y/n. I could have been here with you. Could have driven you to every appointment and we could like… talk about everything and… be together. If you even want that.”
He was right of course. If you’d just told him sooner maybe everything would have fallen into place. Maybe it would’ve been easier.
“Well, what do you think?”
“You’re right. I should have told you much sooner. So this is my fault. I’m… I just didn’t expect you to tell me you love me.”
Harry folded his big palm over your hand and pulled your fingers between his, “I tried doing everything I could to make it obvious to you. I’m still wondering what you think about it, though.”
“It’s... I really like you. I haven’t thought about it too deeply, though. I didn’t want to focus on you too much because you were dating that girl and–“
“Forget about her. Took her to one movie. Went out to lunch twice. Not so much as a peck on the cheek. Would’ve flaked on our date had you told me to stay that one day. Remember that?”
You nodded and smiled, “Yeah. I do.”
“So tell me what you think. Just be honest. I can handle it. I’m a big boy, Y/n.”
You forced air through your nose, “Okay. I like you. I think it would be nice to be in a relationship with you and do this together. I’m sorry I lied to you.”
“Don’t worry about that. It’s in the past. So, you wanna be with me?”
You nodded. It all didn’t feel real. Harry was this gorgeous man, the whole package with his shit together while you were a swollen, hormonal, puffy-faced girl who had no idea what she was doing.
“Good. Now, I promise I’ll finish the crib but can I kiss you? Want to kiss you so bad.”
You sputtered out a laughed yes and rolled your eyes but Harry slid his hand to the back of your head and cut off your exasperated laugh with his mouth over yours. And all the apprehension and uncertainty, the disbelief and the worry melted away as his lips smushed against yours.
And as it was, you were already halfway there – to horny. Lately, that’s just how you were; Always at the tip of horny and tired. But when his tongue slipped into the seam of your lips your response was to push your tongue against his and place your fingers through his hair, nudging yourself closer.
You didn’t stop there, though. Your other hand found his thigh and you flexed your fingers over the dense muscle. The memory of the night you slept together came rushing back. His body was solid and broad and no matter where you touched him it lit your fingertips like flint.
He placed his hand over yours and pulled your fingers upward, “Y/n…” he breathed your name as if he needed to hear it spoken out loud again. It was desperate. Starved. The man was starved. You wondered if the last time he had sex was with you. Selfishly you hoped it was. And selfishly you hoped he’d want to fuck you again.
You felt his hand on your jaw and then his thumb press into your cheekbone, “I missed this mouth, Y/n. I need you…”
He drew his mouth down to your neck and you felt him tongue at your pulse point. A shattered moan escaped your throat when he collared one side of your neck with his big palm and continued brushing his lips on the other.
“I need you too, Harry…” The sentence drizzled into the air like a steamy mist. And then his hand was on your breasts. Your very tender and achy breasts, “Oh god!”
Harry parted from your neck, “Are you okay?”
“I’m… god I’m just…” you didn’t want to say it but you needed it. Needed him. Craved him, “Really, really turned on. It’s been like this for a bit. It’s my hormones.”
Harry pushed a laugh through his nostrils, his heavy gaze dropped to your blouse-covered breasts and then back to your eyes, “Hormones? Is there anything I can do to help with that problem?”
His question was cheeky. The edge of his lips flitted upward teasingly and you laughed, “Yeah. I think you can help.”
Harry licked his lips and pressed his nose against yours, “Tell me what I can do. What do you need?”
His breath was humid against your mouth as you reached for him with puckered lips, an attempt to just get back to it but he backed away from you, dimples carving into his cheeks, “Ah ah ah… I asked you what you needed, Y/n. What’s gonna make you feel good?” His fingers trailed down over the fabric on your blouse.
“I want to have sex. You’re the only man who’s ever made me come and I can’t stop thinking about that night.”
“Really? No one else has ever made you come before?”
You shook your head, “No one else.”
A sudden visage of something like pride and plume took over his face, “And you want that again, do you? Want me to make you come, Y/n?”
“Yes.”
Harry’s hands were gentle as he pulled you back into his arms and smeared his mouth over yours until you found yourself lying on your side facing Harry with his hands on your round belly, “This is mine? I did this to you?”
“Yep. Got me knocked up on the first try,” you splayed your hands over his as he brought them down to the stretchy hem of your blouse and bunched at the material to move it out of his way and expose your tummy.
“It’s not cute. I’m sorry,” you watched as your shirt was lifted and Harry was confronted with the sight of skin stretched tight over your belly.
Dragging his fingers over your bump and to your tits he shushed you, “So cute. The cutest. That’s my baby in there. And you’re so sexy like this.”
He sat up to his knees and helped you out of your top, revealing the thick strapped greige maternity bra that fully covered every inch of your breasts. With his eyes on yours, he reached around to your back to unhook the tiny metal clasps until your straps shimmied free.
His lips parted as he peeled the fabric away from your engorged tits, “Oh fuck, baby…” He pawed at them and softly kneaded in his palms over the flesh, “Feels okay? I don’t wanna hurt you.”
“Yes. It feels so good with your hands on me.”
He moaned as his pupils roved every inch of your skin, dipping down to pull his tongue over and around your nipples only stopping to softly suck before his plush lips feathered kisses down your torso and the sides of your belly.
His fingers slid into the waistband of your pants, “Taking these off, all right?” He peered up at you.
Your chest was already heaving as if you were in the middle of being fucked and you nodded, “Okay.”
The nice thing about maternity wear was that it was easy to remove. Harry got you out of your cotton and lycra pants before you had time to feel shy about letting him see the kind of mess you’d made of your panties. Also greige like your bra.
“And clearly we need to get you out of these things too, Y/n,” he tutted as he cupped the meatiest part of your hips with his palms, “Don’t we?”
You giggled and nodded, “I know it’s a mess. I just can’t help it. The doctor said it’s normal to be like this.”
“Poor thing,” he looked down at the wet stain at the front of your panties, “Could’ve been taking such good care of you all this time.”
You felt your panties slip down your hips before cool air hit your wet pussy and you closed your eyes, “Sorry. Haven’t shaved down there or anything since… well…”
Harry’s graveled moan was accompanied by the feel of his hands on the insides of your knees as he pushed you open, “It’s beautiful.”
You opened your eyes to look down at him between your legs and his dark pupils were already on yours, “Really?”
“Really. Everything about you is so…” he smoothed his palms up the insides of your thighs from your knees and then paused, “I forgot. It’s not good for you to be on your back too long. Isn’t that right?”
You laughed and pushed yourself up by your elbows, “Yeah. That’s true. Did you read that somewhere?”
He nodded, “Not ashamed to admit I did in fact read that somewhere. So, would you like me to eat you out? And if so,” he teased his fingertips into your thighs, “What’s most comfortable for you?”
“I mean, yeah I’d like that but… truly unnecessary given the state I’m in.”
“The state you’re in? You mean pregnant?”
You chuckled, “I mean given how horny I am. I’m just saying you don’t need to prep me or anything.”
“Oh, I can see you need no prepping. It’s not so much about that as it is just making you feel good. Get comfy. I’m gonna lick your pussy.”
Another laugh fell from your chest when you heard the front door to your apartment close. Esie was home.
Harry clambered off the bed and shut your door in haste, “Fuck. I didn’t know she was coming back so soon.”
You scooted yourself back into your pillows, “We’ll just keep it quiet. But I do have one request.”
He raised a brow at you as he returned to your bed placing one knee on the pillowtop mattress with his palms down as he awaited your request.
“Can you take your shirt and pants off? I feel really… on display like this while you’re fully dressed.”
Harry grinned and pushed himself back to plant both feet onto the floor as he pulled his shirt off and then worked at his jeans, bringing them down his legs. You didn’t care that Esie was home. You needed to be fucked. You needed Harry. And the more skin and ink he revealed the more your mouth watered.
Just like 8 months before, he was an impressive sight. All tall and lean muscle (but kind of soft in some spots), inky drawings over long, well-thewed arms, and a broad torso with pecs you could bite into.
He climbed back into bed with you, quickly invading your space with the expanse of his body swathing over you like a mantle before he brought his hands to cradle your face and pressed his lips against yours.
He lowered his palms and groped at your tits, a bit rougher this time, but it only elicited a lewd mewl from your throat. Sensitive as they might be, having Harry touch you at all could only be a good thing.
“You like that, do you?” Harry spoke against your lips with a jesting tone.
You responded with a squeaky bleat to the affirmative when you felt him put pressure on your nipple, smushing it just between his thumb and middle finger.
He licked up from your bottom lip and ran his tongue over yours when you felt his fingers reaching for your other nipple.
Two loud knocks on your door startled you both, “Hey I’m home! Just letting you know!”
“Okay, thanks, Esie!” You and Harry quietly laughed as he put his palms on your knees.
“Do you think she was just telling you she was home, or reminding you to keep it down in here because she could hear us?”
You shrugged, “I don’t know. I mean… I doubt she thinks I have a guy in my bed right now. Much less it being you.”
Harry’s grin softened and he resumed from where you left off before Esie interrupted, this time his lips started at your neck. You relaxed back into the pile of pillows as you watched Harry slowly move further away until he was mouthing at your hips and peering up at you.
But then you felt his finger. It was just one but you felt it tickle at your crease. He ran it lightly along the seam of your pussy up and down before finally dredging in, parting your labia, and slicking it through your pussylips, completely wetting his finger.
Harry kissed at your mons and the curve of where your belly began to extend upward before bringing his lips back down closer to your throbbing clit but not quite there.
When he circled his finger at your slick entrance you rocked your hips, needing to feel his finger pushing inside of you. He kissed your skin at the apex of your thigh with a smacking sound and then finally thrust in, reaching through your insides and then pulled back, hooking his finger upward so it bumped into your spongy g-spot.
But the moment you felt his warm mouth kiss your clit and then tongue all around the tender and needy nub you gasped and reached down to put a hand in his hair, “Yess…”
Harry was surprised by how turned on you were. Slippery and puffy and he’d hardly touched you. But he’d read about how some pregnant women can be very horny until the end of the pregnancy. Ever since the day he learned you were pregnant, even though you told him it wasn’t his, he still learned what he could. Everything from how the body changes and what you might be going through and feeling, to nutritional needs, as well as the best sex positions (he was just a man after all). He never knew most of the things he learned and he was glad for it now that he was getting to have you again.
He wished you’d have told him, though. Wished he could have been there for you emotionally and physically… whatever you needed he’d have done it. But god it would have been so sweet to have been able to call you his girlfriend and show you off to everyone then take you home and fuck your horny little pussy every night.
No need to dwell on the past, though. He was absolutely over the moon that you finally told him and that his suspicions were correct. He was ecstatic you wanted to be with him so he’d make the most of it.
And the small squeaks and pants you were making as he fingered and sucked your clit were all good sounds. Hot. You were hot. So fucking sexy. He really loved how needy you were too. As big as your tummy was, you were grinding your hips down over his finger and lifting into him.
He couldn’t see your face from his spot but your fingers in his hair and the quiver of your thigh told him all he needed to know.
“Fuck…” you breathed out, quiet as you could, “Ohhh… shitshitshit!”
Your pussy pulsed and squeezed at his finger as you began to come. You draped your free arm over your mouth to cover up the gasps and hitched breaths as much as you could.
He’d never in his life made anyone come so fast. He had hardly gotten himself warmed up but there you were, shaking and sighing as you orgasmed into his mouth and around his finger.
When you began to close your thighs around his head and roll to your side to escape his mouth he pulled his finger from your pussy and gripped onto your hips to keep you still so you didn’t fling yourself off the bed.
He sat up and looked you over, smoothing his hands over your arms and to your tummy, “That feel good?”
You laughed and nodded, “Umm. Yeah, I’d say that felt good.”
Harry leaned down and peppered kisses to your tummy and pushed you to your side before he tucked himself behind you and pulled your back to his chest where he began to smush wet kisses to your neck, “You came so fast. You’re so sensitive, Y/n.”
“Mmmm…” you closed your eyes and then felt the bulk of his cock pressing into your backside. He was still wearing his boxer briefs. You pushed your ass back against him and heard a lusty moan vibrating over your ear.
You wanted more, unsurprisingly. Every time you masturbated lately it was two or three orgasms per go, which had never been the case before you got pregnant.
Harry rutted into you, his cock solid and aching. He hadn’t had sex with anyone since you and now he was desperate to get his cock wet. Desperate for you. No one else did it for him after you.
“Getting my underwear all wet,” he breathed his words between kisses and rocks of his hips, “You need some more, Y/n?”
Harry’s hands were cradling your tummy and rubbing at your tits as he humped against you and you nodded into your pillows, “I need more. Want you inside of me.”
Music to his ears. “Yeah? Need so much from me, don’t you? Need my baby in your womb, and my cock deep inside at the same time?”
“Fuck… yes I do…”
Harry leveraged himself up by one arm and pulled his underwear down his legs as fast as he could manage. His cock was throbbing and weeping at the tip already. He hoped he didn’t disappoint this time around because he was certain he wasn’t going to last long.
You turned to watch him and reached down behind you to wrap your fingers around his cock as he settled back onto his side. You felt the dribble of precome at his slit and spread it down his cock slowly, “I just wanna make sure… I know we slept together without a condom once but, like… I don’t know if you were sleeping with anyone else or–“
“You’re the last person I slept with. But we can–“
You moaned, cutting off the rest of his statement where he was about to suggest a condom, “Oh good. Just fuck me then.”
Angling his thick cock to your entrance you raised your hip to guide him in and with an easy thrust forward he spread your pussy apart and drove into you languidly. You both moaned in relief. You kept yourself turned to look at him as he entered you until he was pasted against your ass.
When he reared back and pushed in you laid your head down on the pillow. Every inch of him getting stuffed into you was filthy and wet sounding.
Harry kept a slow pace as he buried himself in and pulled back before thrusting into your sloppy wet hole. His balls were already squeezing as he rocked into you, “Pussy feels so good, Y/n. Fuck baby…”
You slid your fingers over your clit and buried your face into the pillow as you moaned his name. He could hear your muffled noises and he leaned back so he could see as he split you apart on his cock.
Everything was wet between your legs as he watched himself slide in and out, his cock coated in your cream already. Sloppy thrust after sloppy wet thrust. He dragged his thumb over the space of your pussy where you were gripping around him as he rolled into you, feeling the way you stretched for him.
You felt the liquidy heat of your orgasm slowly seeping through your nerves and your organs with every slick plunge of his cock. He filled up the space of your pussy just right, every stroke of him through your aching core glided against all your secret little crevices, bumping your g-spot and slithering through to your guts.
You’d done well to keep quiet as quiet as you were. You’d gotten good at quietly coming over the years of having a roommate. But Harry was testing this skill of yours.
“Wrapped around my cock like you needed it, baby. Listen to how creamy you are,” he inhaled sharply through his teeth before continuing to whisper into your ear, “All for me. Gonna make you come as many times as you want. Buy you a house where we can raise our little family together. Fuck all my babies into you…”
Harry didn’t know exactly what he was saying. He was delirious; holding back his orgasm as he felt you trembling around him. He grunted as he continued, “Gonna keep you satisfied, take care of you and our baby. Protect you…”
His words weren’t all that filthy. Not as filthy as they could have been but somehow the talk of raising a family with him and protecting you pushed you off the precipice and over the edge. You bit your lip and your whole body trembled as you hastened your fingers on your clit.
“Shit… holy shit…” Harry breathed out when he felt you coming around him and practically convulsing in his arms. You moaned as quietly as you could but his hips were slapping into your ass as he fucked you through your release.
You’d never come so hard in your life. You were sure it was because you were having actual sex with a man you’d wanted for so long all while your hormones were going haywire. Your pussy pulsed and fluttered, clenching on Harry’s cock as he squeezed his eyes closed and choked out a gasp, gluing his hips to your bum, grinding in and began to pump his come into your cunt.
He thought he could wait until you were done but you kept coming and shaking, your pussy vibrating over him like a siphon trying to milk him. He couldn’t resist, “Fuck!”
His cock throbbed violently inside of your warm channel as he emptied every drop of himself into you, holding you close as he rutted inward, dredging his cock as deep into your pussy as it could go.
He felt your hand reach over his forearm and rub as he opened his eyes and caught his breath. You were sweaty and gorgeous lying on your side all fucked out with your eyes closed and a satisfied smile on your lips. He kissed your cheek and squeezed your bum in his palm.
“I love you, Harry.” You whispered.
You’d said it back, finally. Harry leaned over to see your face, “Say it again?”
Opening your eyes you sighed and turned your head to look up at him, “I love you.”
Harry tilted your chin toward him and kissed your lips softly, “I love you, Y/n.”
It would have been bliss to have just stayed like that in Harry’s arms, with his soft pink lips dragging over your skin all night. Perhaps another round even. But there was the matter of the unfinished crib and your roommate, Esie who was about to find out about you and Harry.
“Promised you I’d finish the crib before I left,” he pecked at your cheek and sat up.
“Why don’t you stay the night?”
“You sure? That means Esie’s gonna know.” He grinned.
“I’m positive. I think it’s about time everyone knows.”
He couldn’t have agreed more.
. . .
Watching Harry holding your baby was like something out of a dream. He was standing, cradling her little head with his big palm and kissing her soft peach fuzz forehead between whispered words you couldn’t hear.
When he finally turned to set his eyes on you the look on his face was unlike anything you’d ever seen from him before. It was awe and love and overwhelm and joy all wrapped up in his eyes.
“I love her so much. And I love you. I can’t even describe–“ he blinked the tears from his eyes as his lip quivered and you reached out toward them.
“Come here. Sit with me.” You beckoned.
Harry sat next to you on the hospital bed and situated the little one into the crook of his arm between you two. You reached up and ran your fingers into his curls, “I love you, Harry. I’m so happy. Both of you make me happier than I’ve ever been. I’m glad we ended up together.”
Harry leaned in, carefully so as not to smush the precious life in his arms, and gave you a chaste kiss, “Me too, Y/n. I can’t believe how perfect she is. How amazing you are. I’m just blown away right now.”
You breathed out a laugh as you both stared down at the life you two had created. A beautiful sleeping bundle and she was all yours. All his. When her little lips stressed open and she let out the tiniest crackle of a yawn your heart felt like it was going to rupture from being so full of love.
“She’s beautiful, Harry. Look at her.”
“I know. I can’t take my eyes off her.”
You were exhausted but flying. Every kind of happy chemical; oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins were all flowing through your veins unencumbered. The labor was a difficult one, though. Harry’s baby was big. She came out at just under 9 lbs and you learned that Harry was a big baby as well. You cursed him a few times but after everything was said and done you couldn’t have been happier.
You fluttered your gaze from the man holding your child to the sweet little thing in his arms over and over. Your little family, all whole and healthy and happy.
“You should get something to eat, Harry. You haven’t eaten.”
He looked at you, those starry green eyes that could melt you right into your bed, “You just want to be alone with her don’t you?”
Shaking your head you laughed, “I mean that’s really not the motivation. I was just thinking about how we’re all healthy and it’s the most wonderful thing. But you haven’t eaten. I haven’t seen you eat anything since before I went into labor. It’s been like a whole day, more than a whole day, Harry. And while I scarfed down my jello and the little protein drink you were holding her and you haven’t left my side so you have to be hungry.”
“I am a little. I don’t want to leave, though. I feel like I have to be here in case anything happens…”
Cupping his cheek you shook your head, “Nothing will happen to us. The cafeteria is still open. You can get something and bring it up here. My mom won’t be back for another hour or so. Just grab a snack even. I need you healthy.”
Harry leaned into your palm and closed his eyes, “Okay.”
He placed your daughter into your arms and kissed your forehead as he gently caressed her cheek, “I’ve got the two most beautiful girls in the world. I’m the luckiest man alive.”
“I think you’re just as emotional as I am right now,” you laughed. “Now. Let me have a minute alone with my daughter while you grab a quick snack.”
“Okay, Mom. You’re the boss.”
You took his hand, “Hurry back, Dad.”
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reidrum · 2 days
Text
all yours if you want me | s.r
pairing: spencer reid x bau!fem!reader
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a/n: i think i really like this but if i proofread it one more time im gonna hate it so im just putting it out now lol. this is the full version of the sneak peak i posted last week woohoo ! also this is my first time writing smut so im sorry if it sucks but i hope y'all like it <3
summary: bau's got their first day off in weeks, and you're heading straight to the club to have some fun, you just didn't expect your coworker/crush to also be there while you're trying to forget him.
cw: 18+ minors pls dni, smut, p in v (dont be silly wrap ur willy), munch!spence, lowkey softdom!spence, suggestive dancing in public spaces, minor insecure reader, reader is afab and wears a dress and heels
wc: 4.6k
pls let me know if i forgot anything and let me know your thoughts pleaseee xx
it was the first friday night off you and any of the team members of the bau had in a long time, and you all were determined to spend it well. jj and hotch immediately went home to their families, penelope and emily decided they were going home to get some well needed rest, rossi went to a cigar club, not really sure what derek and spencer ended up doing, but you knew what you were doing tonight.
you’d had a long standing invitation from one of your college friends for a club night, and at first you’d decline because you’d get swept away on a case, and because you were hopelessly pining after your hot nerdy coworker dr. spencer reid.
spencer was smart in many ways, three PhDs, countless published papers, not to mention that eidetic memory of his. there was one thing that spencer was just fucking dumb at, and it was your shameless flirting at him.
like it annoyed you how clueless he was. you’d bring him coffee in the mornings with hearts drawn on it, fall asleep on his shoulder on the jet rides back, even complimenting his outfit or looks which made him flustered, but still nothing. your harbored crush seemed to stay just that, a crush. and while you’d hope he would get the hint he just hasn’t.
so you pull out your phone to text your friend. 
“barry’s at 9?”
“oh my god FINALLY. i’m there i'll pick you up at 8:30.”
you grin to yourself, this was good. you needed to get out and unwind for once.
you drive home quickly to hop in the shower before your friend comes to get you. throwing on a silk slip dress as your outfit of choice, you slipped your heels on and met your friend in the car.
walking into the club, you’re met with the thumping bass of the music playing and the staunch smell of alcohol, sweat, and sex.
it made you think about the last time you got laid, which was a really long time ago. and honestly you wanted to sleep with spencer so bad you hadn’t been making advances elsewhere. but that was going to change tonight, you were determined to have good slutty fun, and hopefully get laid.
your friend grabbed your hand and beelined to the bar, ordering two tequila shots each. once you downed them you moved to the dance floor and started preying for a target. as you’re scanning the room, you notice a familiar looking mop of brown hair standing next to bald headed man. a combo you knew all too well.
-
derek morgan was a player. and before he’s a player, he’s a damn good friend. which was his reasoning for dragging spencer out of his apartment to come out to the club and have fun.
“but i can have fun at home by myself morgan.”
“kid, you need to let loose once in a while. you are young, i’m just helping you take advantage of it.”
-
so now spencer’s at the club (a sentence he still struggles to believe) wearing trousers and navy button down shirt to which morgan had popped the top buttons open because ‘it gives the ladies a sneak peek’. he just rolled his eyes and went with it. he’s nursing a shirley temple at the bar, perusing the environment when he comes across a pair of eyes he knows like the back of his hand.
when you recognize the amber eyes you couldn’t believe your luck. of course, on the one night you’d decided to explore other options he shows up in the least expected place for him to be. so much for getting over him, you think. shyly raising your hand to wave, spencer returns the gesture. morgan takes note, “who are you waving t- oh, pretty girl is here huh pretty boy?” he nudges him.
a blush raises on his face. spencer thought you were attractive, like really attractive. you were a great addition to the bau and he admired your work ethic a lot, the day you walked into the bullpen wearing a fitted pantsuit had his own pants growing real tight. he still remembers when you introduced yourself and he couldn’t even get up without exposing himself. you thankfully didn’t think it was weird, and spencer was relieved when it was finally time to go home. he’d be lying if he said he didn’t have nights where he wished you were the one finishing him off and not his rough hands. he didn’t think you’d like someone like him, and took all of your ‘advances’ as morgan calls them, as acts of kindness.
morgan laughs as he watches spencer’s iq deteriorate to below 50 staring at you, “do you what you gotta do man. but you better be going home with someone tonight okay?”
spencer nods and nurses his drink a bit and looks back to morgan to realize he’s already off dancing with some girls in the corner. damn.
after your distanced encounter with spencer, you decide it’s time to move on and have some fun on your own. you couldn’t be hung up on him anymore, at least not tonight. tonight was for bad decisions.
good thing bad decision walked up to you asking to dance, whatshisname leads you to the dance floor and puts his hands on your hips, swaying to the beats of t-pain and pitbull.
you didn’t know, but spencer was watching every move you made. he watched you get led to the dance floor, the way he placed his hands right on your ass and squeezed, and how he turned you around so you were dancing on his front with your back. he gripped his glass so tight the bartender had to tell him he’d have to pay if it breaks.
he gets it, you’re attractive. this is the kind of thing that happens to people who look like you. who wouldn’t want you? but then he watched it happen a second time. and a third. and a fourth and fifth, till he just stopped counting at nine for his sanity.
spencer was not used to the green monster taking over him, but oh god was he fucking seething with jealousy.
you realized spencer was watching you by whatshisname number five. he hadn’t moved from his spot and he was constantly staring in your direction. deciding to do a little experiment, you played up your dancing a lot more, acting more flirtatious, dragging the guy’s hands further down, and letting out open mouthed moans that you knew spencer couldn’t hear but could definitely see. you watched as his jaw shifted and his knuckles turned white as you danced with each guy, realizing the growing effect that you now had on him.
by whatshisname number nine, you casted your hook. making sure to face spencer and meet his eyes, you watched as they darkened when he realized you were looking right at him. spencer might’ve brushed it off as a coincidence, but then you winked at him. and he realized what you were doing—you were taunting him, and fuck was it working for him. the bulge in his pants grew uncomfortable that he had to stand up to not draw so much attention to it under the bar lights. 
you watched him stand up and adjust himself and you threw your line. when he looked back up at you, you made a come here motion with your index finger and a bite of your lip. spencer’s eyes darkened impossibly more, he paid for his tab and strode over to you.
sinker.
he pulled you from the man behind you, who muttered a ‘what the fuck’ and moved away. spencer pulled you flush to his chest and with a low voice in the crest of your ear he whispered, “what do you think you’re doing?”
“i don’t think i know what you’re talking about dr. reid, could you explain it to me?”
spencer tightens his hold on you and ghosts over your ear once more, “this is a dangerous game you’re playing, sweetheart.”
“a game you joined the second you walked over here.”
he looked at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes, and matched the small smirk on your lips. game on.
the song changed to something with a more sultry beat, and you used the opportunity to wrap your arms around his neck and let his hands guide your hips to the music. while he wasn’t much of a dancer, he could definitely keep a beat. it didn’t prove to be so difficult when your chest was pushing up on his own that he was just waiting for them to spill out. he realized he could feel your hardened nipples through your slip, the nubs rubbing friction through the fabric of their clothes. he moaned internally while he gripped your hips to pull you even closer. it was clear spencer seemed to be getting comfortable with moving your body and holding you close, but you couldn’t let that happen.
before the second chorus you turn around in his arms so your back is pressed up against his front, and you start dancing on him.
spencer’s taken by surprise, something you felt when his hands faltered the confident rhythm it kept up, and while he watched you dance just like this with all those guys it’s like his mind is blank now.
you recognize the song playing, collide by justine skye & tyga, and use the sultry beat to your advantage. you move your ass hard on his front, feeling his length pressed between your cheeks. you gesture for him to lean his head down and he lets out a low groan as you whisper in his ear, “all that for me?”.
a primal instinct starts to take over spencer’s being, and he grips your hips to meet his rutting from behind. spencer was desperate for any friction that could soothe the growing ache in his pants. you grinned as you felt take what he needed from you. it was quickly wiped off your face when you felt his hands inching dangerously close to where you really wanted him.  you place your hands on his with surprise and look at him, “what are you doing?”
“i don’t think i know what you’re talking about, sweetheart,” he threw back at you, “but if there’s something you’d like me to do, i’m all ears.” spencer grazes his fingers under the hem of your dress, toying with the lace band of your panties and slipping his fingers below it to stroke your inner thighs.
fuck. he turned it on you so fast it almost gave you whiplash. the provocative dancing was something you could handle, hell everyone on that dance floor was doing the same thing as you both. what you weren’t sure you could handle was him about to touch you in a public space. but, your body betrayed you as it turned you on to another plane. you look up at him with lust filled eyes and let out a breathy moan of his name. spencer collapses internally and stands his ground, “if you want something, beg me.”
spencer thinks he’s won the upper hand, and he’s feeling so smug behind you. he still thinks he has the upper hand until you reach down and place his middle and index finger in your mouth, circling your tongue around the digits.
“touch me.” you moan out, releasing his fingers.
spencer is dumbfounded how he’s the one about to burst out his pants when he made you beg for him. it should make him feel embarrassed at how close he was, but he couldn’t find it in him to care. not when you in his arms pleading him to do something. you sounded so pretty, and who was he to deny a pretty thing like you?
his fingers continue their journey down, outlining the lace trim resting on your thighs. he hooks his fingers on the fabric to pull it aside and slips into you, going at an aching pace to gather the wetness and groaning out, “jesus, you’re so wet, was this all for me? you needed my attention that bad, baby?”
you whimper and grip his hand even tighter because you’re not sure if your legs are holding out any longer. it’s all so overwhelming—having his hands down your panties in the middle of the dance floor, the lewdity of the noises in your ear, the hard length pressing desperately on your ass. this is all you’ve ever wanted from him, to want you. and now it’s happening, and your brain can’t fire the neurons fast enough to process the moment. instead your body responded with your skin heating up with anticipation, heart beating out as much adrenaline to keep up. the daze is getting foggier by the second as he trails his fingers up and down your slit, spreading the wetness and circling your clit on the way up. and you think you’re about to get accustomed to the pace he’s set, when he delves between your folds and you moan out loud so abruptly that the nearby patrons looked around wondering where it came from.
you can feel spencer’s shit eating grin behind you as he moves his head down to leave love bites on your neck. if he can feel your bluff dissipating, he’s not saying anything. his fingers set a painfully slow rhythm, and you grind down trying to get any more friction to reach your peak. he’s hitting you in all the right spots that make you see the stars and beyond, leaning your head back on his chest as you barrel towards your climax. you feel yourself mere seconds away from reaching, and spencer suddenly pulls his fingers out, making you whine out in protest, “wh- what are you doing?”
spencer grabs your wrist and starts dragging you through the sweaty bodies surrounding you, tightening his grip with a small smirk as he passes a few of the guys you were dancing with earlier. suckers.
he pushes the doors open with a force and while the cool air is attempting to return your body to homeostasis, the anticipation of where he’s going overtakes you, “spence, where are we going wh-“ you cut off your sentence with a gasp as he handles you flush to the door of his car. then it’s just silence for a few moments. no loud bass or weird dudes, just the two of you. the only sound that can be heard are your breaths competing for prominence. you look up at him and focus on the details of his face illuminated by the moonlight, trying to read his expression. his honeyed eyes have fully darkened to a lustful hickory, and suddenly you felt like a gazelle being preyed on by a lion.
he reaches into his pocket and unlocks the car with a soft beep. it’s the focused eyes on you that drive you to open the door, but it’s the subtle silent nod of his head towards the car that makes you move inside waiting for him to join you. he climbs in after you, shutting the door and locking it.
spencer moves to the middle seat and allows his legs to spread open, he taps his thighs and faintly says, “come here.”
you shuffle closer and swing your legs over him, your dress rising up a little as you fully sit on his clothed crotch. and now you realize the corporeality of the moment. it’s like, really real now. all this time pining after the boy genius with no luck and now he’s got you in the backseat of his car and your panties crooked, waiting for you to move. the bravado you wore and so tightly held onto for a majority of the night comes crashing down like a shattered vase, and you’re not sure if you have any more in you to salvage the pieces. you may be a profiler, but try as you might you are not a mind reader, yet you so desperately want to know what he’s thinking. is it too much to ask what this means? will it overwhelm him to say you’ve dreamt about this moment for many nights, and how those dreams went on till the early morning when he’d stay and brush your hair back with a temple kiss. the whispers of sweet nothings sticking to you like honey as you got ready for the day. are these questions you even want to know the answer to?
you may not be a mind reader, but he is dr. spencer reid, who noticed your demeanor change after too long of a silence.
“hey,” he holds your chin delicately to your eyes, “it’s okay if you want to stop, i’m sorry for tak-“
it’s your turn to cut him off, “no! no i, i still want this, i just,” you falter.
“just what, baby?” he coos softly.
it makes tears well up in your eyes, you hope he can’t see them, “i’ve just wanted this for so long, and it’s probably embarrassing that i’m admitting this now of all times, but i don’t know if i can handle this meaning more to me than it does to you.” you confess quietly.
spencer listens to your admission and gingerly resecures his arm behind you, a position he thinks is starting to become second nature. he rubs soft shapes into the small of your back, “what makes you think that?”
“because i basically threw myself at you tonight, and it seems to be the first time you noticed me.” you say halfheartedly. 
“you think i don’t notice you?” he whispers, leaning in to leave soft kisses in the crook of your neck. spencer is dumbfounded, confused at how you reached such a conclusion. but as a man of science, he feels there’s only one way to prove himself. he breathes your name out, “can i show you how much i notice you? please?”
you nod, at least you could commit this moment to memory if it was all you’d have left of him. he presses his lips to yours for the first time that night, your breath faltering as he becomes more feverous with his attacks. slotting his tongue with yours, your hands move up to his silky hair to take purchase in. he lets out a groan as he pulls back from you, “i need to taste you.”
he guides your body to lean back on the center console, the only way his tall figure would be able to accommodate this position. your legs are still split on either side of his legs, using your hands to prop yourself up to watch his movements. he hooks his fingers on the sides of your panties and slowly slides them down, moaning at the way your slick causes resistance as he pulls them off your legs. wrapping his arms under your thighs to lift you up to face level, he places small kisses on your inner thighs as he makes his way to your core. he places a final kiss on your center before licking a long stripe up to your clit. moaning out wantonly, he continues his ministrations and kitten licks all over you, circling back up to your clit after each round.
“spence..” you whine out. he moves his focus to your clit, circling and sucking till you’re squirming in his arms so much has to grip your thighs. your hands are fussing through his hair, gripping and pulling to find something to ground you. spencer then slips his fingers into your core for the second time tonight, and you lose it.
he’s pumping his fingers in and out, that all you can hear is the squelching noises of your cunt. adding another one, you’re unable to stay still anymore, as if you were before.
“oh my fuck, spencer. i’m gonna cu-, cum. please don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop.” you moan out filthy.
spencer unlatches his mouth for a moment, “come for me, baby.”
your orgasm crashes down on you like a wave breaking on the shore. it’s all consuming, leaving you shaking and breathless and he lifts his head from between your legs and you see his chin glistening with you in the moonlight. the sight itself is so pornographic, you can’t help but shuffle back onto his lap to crash your lips back to his, tasting yourself on his tongue. he tangles his hands in your hair as you move yours between you both, unzipping his trousers to palm him through his boxers.
he breakily moans in your ear as you slowly pull back the band to take him out. the sight takes you by surprise, you knew he was big, you felt it on your ass while you were dancing. but seeing how it compared to your hand had you bulging your eyes.
“you’re so big,” you whisper. how the hell was that fitting inside of you?
spencer the mind reader places his hand on top of yours as you lazily stroke him, “we’ll go slow, don’t worry.” he can’t help but feel his ego inflate to the skies, he can’t remember the last time he had someone look intimidated by him.
nodding faintly, you gather the spit in your mouth and let it fall between you both to land on the flushed pink tip. you spread it up and down his length, setting a slow pace that had him moaning expletives in your ear.
“oh-, ohhh, fuck baby. you’re so good at that holy shit,” he says trying to hold himself together. you give him a few more pumps before lifting your hips up to guide him inside you. you move his tip to your entrance, rubbing it teasingly before spencer places his hands on your sides to stabilize you, and slowly sink you down onto him.
the second his tip pushes past your folds, you both moan out in harmony. placing your hands on his shoulders you leverage yourself to sink down further inch by inch, until your core is flush with the base of his thighs.
spencer is a man of many words, maybe too many. but right now the only word he can remember is your name as he watched you take his length whole inch by inch slowly losing any restraint he had left. the pressure his cock had inside of you was heavenly. you’d never felt so full, and you could tell he was trying so hard to stay still as you adjusted above him.
when you bottom out spencer throws his head back against the seat, “oh that’s it, good girl,” you clenched around him. “you okay?”
you nod in response, ignoring the way the term of endearment sent flutters to your heart, and attempt an experimental rock of your hips, causing spencer’s head to whip up and meet your lust blown eyes with his own. he adjusts his hands on the sides of your thighs and starts helping you move up and down on his length, setting a brutally slow pace.
you rest your head and moan into the crook of his neck as he continues his movements, “spencer, please, more, i can take it.”
he still can’t believe what’s happening right now, all those days he spent thinking about you in the bullpen, at home, everywhere really, and here you were begging on top of him to fuck you good.
“you still think i don’t notice you?” he says into your ear, “i have dreamt about what you’d look like bouncing on my cock, and you are blowing any idea i had out of the water.”
you whimper as he continues, “and when i’m not thinking about ruining you, i am in awe at how you walk through life. you bring so much joy everywhere you go, it’s a blessing to be able to experience you.” he says through shaky breaths.
the praise goes straight to core, with some traveling to your heart again, and you’re not sure how much longer you can hold on before you unravel physically and emotionally.
his hands are guiding you up and down at a harder pace now, “so,” thrust. “you still think,” thrust, “i don’t notice you?” he thrusts into you once more and holds you down, making sure you’re looking directly at him, “it was never an option to brush past you, you are everything to me. i didn’t know how to show that without overwhelming you. i’m sorry.”
tears well up in your eyes again, spencer notices this time and presses a small kiss on your forehead. all your senses feel like they’re in overdrive, unable to comprehend anything right now. your skin feels like it’s on fire as he rolls your hips faster to meet his ruts.
“spence, i- i’m so close.” you whine desperately. 
he slips his hand between you both to rub your clit, “i know baby, i’ve got you. let go for me.”
his words were enough to break the dam, your second climax of the night hurling towards you. the white hot feeling overtook your whole body, shaking and clenching above him. your grip on him was threateningly vicious, probably leaving deep crescent marks in the nape of his shoulders. you wish the euphoria would last forever if it meant having spencer like this. as you came down from your high, the two of you were still moving together, slowly rocking your hips to meet each other. once you were grounded again, you pushed through the sensitivity in your core to rise up on his length, just barely leaving the tip in before you slid back down fast and hard, now focusing on spencer reaching his peak.
“oh jesus, fuck.” spencer moaned out brokenly.
“come on spence you can do it,” you taunted as you clenched down, “come inside me, make a mess of me please.” a rush of confidence flowed through as you whispered into his ear, and spencer held your hips to help you bounce faster on him.
spencer let out a loud groan as you felt the hot spurts coat your insides, he was leaving matching crescent marks on the sides of your hips as the ones on his shoulders, making sure all of him was left in you. feeling him soften inside, you remained on his lap with him sheathed in you. you both are breathing heavily, leaning back to hopefully give you both some relief from the sex filled air. looking around the car you realize that all the windows are fogged up and let out a tiny giggle.
“what’s so funny?” he looks up at you slightly amused and very out of breath.
“no it’s just, the windows are such a dead giveaway for what we just did in here.” 
“eh, i don’t really care what people think.”
“gasp, dr. reid wants to let the world know he has car sex with random girls?”
he leans in to bite your neck playfully, “random? did nothing i said during all that register for you?”
you yelp and attempt to play dumb, “actually i don’t remember a word, you might have to jog my memory. maybe even recreate the circumstances to help with cementing it. i read about situational memorization where certain scenarios are easily remembered when there’s a big event to anchor it to.”
he swears he could’ve melted on the spot at you explaining a concept you’d read about to him, “careful sweetheart, calling it a big event might inflate my ego a little too high.”
“i mean, i can tell it worked,” you tease as you feel him harden inside of you again, “so tell me genius, how many times does a scenario have to happen for me to remember the information?”
“i guess we’ll have to find out, don’t we?”
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🩷🌸HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF ?🩷🌸
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🌸Who is your role-model ? Why do you look upto them ? What you do you like about them ? Do you like how they are kind to others without expecting anything in return ? Do you like them because they take exquisite care of themselves ? Think about the specific traits you like about your role-model and add these traits /qualities in your character. Start identifying yourself with those qualities.
🩷Look into the mirror and tell yourself affirmations. You can keep them simple or exaggerate them , it doesn't matter. Affirmations help us to boost our self-esteem. It also helps to reduce stress and anxiety. Here are some self-love affirmations - click me and click me!! You can also listen to songs which have positive lyrics or vibes. This post can help - click me !!
🌸TALK TO YOURSELF LIKE YOU WOULD TALK TO YOUR BEST-FRIEND OR LOVED ONE. YOUR LOVED ONE MADE A TINY MISTAKE , WOULD YOU CRITICISE THEM ? HAVE A POSTIVE SELF-TALK. When you are alone , pay attention to what you are saying to yourself. Are you cursing yourself for your past mistakes or thinking about how you are so strong to go through all that and not give up ?
One more tip for postive self-talk , look at your childhood photo and ask yourself? Would you tell her/him that they are dumb and not worthy of their desires or Would you tell them that they are worthy of their wildest dreams and they are capable too ? Talk to yourself as you would talk to your child version. Be that person your childhood version needed. They needed love and respect.
🩷Stop caring about other's opinions. Your opinion about yourself matters alot. Why ? You create your reality. If you decide you are pretty, then you are. Being pretty is a mindset. Also , we have conscious and subconscious mind , right ? On a conscious level, you have the ability to reject opinions that you don't like. If someone calls you ugly , you have the ability to reject their opinion. If you reject other's negative opinions because you have the ability on a conscious level to reject , the idea won't impress on your subconscious mind but if you accept their opinion and take their opinion as facts, you will accept it on a conscious level, your subconscious have no ability to reject , it must accept . I hope I was able to make myself clear . In other words , your opinion matters the most !! Also , if you understand yourself , you won't care what others say , if you have brown eyes and someone says that they are blue , would you believe them ? No !
🌸Focus on the qualities you like about yourself .As Wonyoung said , people can give you criticism even when you don't need it , so you must give yourself nothing but LOVE !
🩷Make self-care a daily ritual. When you take care of yourself , you will look better and feel good too !
🌸Don't compare yourself with others. It is a tragedy for people who live in a constant state of comparison. Be your own dream life. Be so focused on watering your own grass that you don't care if someone else's grass is greener. Here are some affirmations that can help you - click me !
🩷Be disciplined.
🌸Have boundaries and put yourself first. You will never regret putting yourself first !
🩷Stop seeking validation from others. Their validation is irrelevant. The only person who truly knows you is YOU !!! If you always seek others validation , you will become their slave. Compliment yourself , stop expecting others to compliment about how pretty or smart , compliment yourself about how pretty you are ! Hype yourself up !! These affirmations can help - click me !
🌸Protect your energy. Cut off toxic people, don't fight with stupid people. Don't consume negative media.
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pluckyredhead · 2 days
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Please ship Orion and Lightray with me, thank you
If you've been reading my Fourth World posting, you might have noticed me mentioning Orion and Lightray's relationship. This is because they're in love and I'm obsessed with them. Please join me in grumpy/sunshine-but-they're-alien-demigods hell, with visual references below.
So Orion, as we know, is the son of Darkseid who was raised on New Genesis but has always felt different and monstrous compared to his peers. Lightray is his best friend, who thinks Orion is just the best thing since sliced bread and says so constantly.
This is literally how we're introduced to them, in New Gods #1:
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Lightray: Don't be sad. Hug time! Orion: Hugs are not for one such as me. But you're still my best friend. Lightray: Please let me enter your chambers. Orion: NO THEY ARE TOO DARK. Lightray: D:
This panel, from #6, sums up their whole dynamic really well:
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Lightray doesn't crave battle the way Orion does but he is determined to stay by his side, while Orion doesn't want Lightray to fight beside him because he thinks Lightray is too good and pure to be tainted by violence.
Zero personal space.
So one of the things about Orion is that his real face is sort of brutish and not traditionally handsome (the eyebrows are WILD), but he uses his Mother Box (like a living pocket computer that loves you) to make himself look more like the people of New Genesis. In #8, he gets into a knock-down, drag-out fight with his half-brother Kalibak that nearly kills them both, and Mother Box can't maintain the illusion (and also his face is, like, pulverized). And then this happens:
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I WEEP. LIGHTRAY LOVES YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE, ORION.
New Gods was canceled soon after this, but when Kirby returned a decade later, he went all in on the homoerotic devotion. So Orion goes to Apokolips to kill his dad and rescue his mom, and who do you think follows him?
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That second panel makes me laugh so hard. "Here, honey, you forgot your Scooty Puff Jr!"
My favorite thing about this is that Lightray is playing dumb. He shot at Orion earlier and then said something vague about missing on purpose...but he didn't:
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HE REALLY TRIED TO WOUND ORION ENOUGH TO STOP HIS SUICIDE MISSION. And the way he just shuts his eyes and takes Orion's anger because he doesn't care what happens as long as he saves his friend's life...! (Orion doesn't hurt him, they just touch each other a lot.)
Anyway they argue for multiple pages, with Orion insisting that Lightray go home and Lightray insisting that he stay, until finally:
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This is so intensely romantic and also so unintentionally hilarious that I can't stand it. The homoerotic gazing into one another's eyes and then the stupid mutual thumbs up! Whatever is going on with that closeup of Orion in the second panel! I die!
...And you know who else dies? Orion! Or at least he comes very close (it's unclear), but is rescued by a freedom fighter named Himon and nursed back to health by Himon and his daughter Bekka. We get a little romance between Orion and Bekka, but we also get Lightray coming to visit:
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That is some FULL CONTACT wrestling, boys. Orion pinning Lightray to the ground while telling him it's good to see him is so much, but the fourth panel is even mucher. My goodness.
And then things get serious, because they both believe they are going to die in the upcoming battle (they don't), so they bid each other farewell and Lightray leaves, and then:
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Orion yells after Lightray how smart and funny he is and then collapses in despair because his friend is gone. "HOW LIKE A WANDERING STAR HE SEEMS." Oh my god, Orion.
That's it for Kirby, so I'll move on to other writers and artists, but I want to clear that I'm only sharing the most intense scenes between them. There are so many panels, from Kirby and others, of Lightray faithfully following Orion around, joyously welcoming him back to New Genesis, gently teasing him, and talking about how brave and noble he is. And of Orion only smiling for Lightray, going feral when he gets hurt, and telling him he's too good and pretty for battle. And of the two of them touching each other. A lot.
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Literally just two random examples. THEY DO THIS SHIT ALL THE TIME.
The next really big moment comes in New Gods (1995), where the Source (basically God/Heaven) becomes corrupted and Lightray goes evil and Orion has to beat him up to stop him and I will never ever ever recover from these pages:
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"You want the beast? Do you like it?" on its own is...hoo boy, SOMETHING. But it is eclipsed by the tremulous "Maybe...maybe if I can just hold him" and Orion gathering Lightray up in his arms while telling him he loves him. LIKE. THIS IS SO MUCH. (P.S. Lightray's fine don't worry. And yes, he does want the beast.)
Then we get to Orion (PLEASE read this comic) and the biggest smile Orion has ever smolt:
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Look at how happy he is!!! You need to understand that his mother died in his arms ten minutes ago and he's still like "Lightray! Omg hi!!!" (To be fair, his mother was terrible.) Plus bonus unnecessary touching, Lightray's love language being gifts, and Orion giggling and twirling his hair while going "Omg you're so smart."
(Also, when Lightray mentions his "brief but troubling visit" to Apokolips in the second panel, what's not saying is that he put on a silly disguise and went to see a fortuneteller to try to figure out if Orion's mom was lying about Darkseid not being his real dad (she was; again, she was terrible), and when the fortuneteller is like "You DARE come to Apokolips?!" he goes "I would dare anything for my friend!" I know you would, honey. I know you would.)
The next bit requires some explanation. So, as briefly as possible: Orion kills Darkseid (or so he thinks), takes over Apokolips, and tries very hard to change it for the better. He also accidentally gains possession of the Anti-Life Equation, the formula Darkseid is always searching for that eradicates free will, and gradually is driven to use it to FORCE everyone on Apokolips to be good. And Earth. And New Genesis.
Eventually, Orion is seemingly killed, but actually he's been teleported somewhere unfathomably far away, where he realizes what he's done and sinks into suicidal despair. In the midst of this, he manages to both destroy the Anti-Life Equation AND save all of reality (and nearly die in the process), but he still thinks that because he used the Equation, he's irredeemable and doesn't deserve to exist.
So when he's teleported back to Earth and captured by a human who blinds him and rigs him up to a torture device so that he can drain Orion's life force and use it to be eternally youthful, Orion just...lets it happen. Because he thinks he deserves it. For SEVEN MONTHS.
But eventually he's like "Wait...I deserve this, but probably whatever is being done with my energy is not good and I should stop it." He tries to escape but only manages to let out a single scream.
Luckily, Lightray has been searching for him nonstop for those seven months, despite the face that Orion is supposed to be dead. And then we get this:
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To be clear: this is sweet, gentle Lightray absolutely obliterating the men who kept Orion in the torture device.
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Nakey.
Lightray gives Orion the crushed remnants of his wrist cuffs, and Orion does a magical girl transformation about it:
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For everyone playing along at home, that's the second time Orion has canonically told Lightray that he loves him.
Anyway, Orion goes off to get revenge on the guy who did this to him (it's very satisfying, please read Orion), and then he's depressed some more until he has some brotherly bonding time with Scott and finally feels well enough to go back to New Genesis. His last line of dialogue in the series is "For it is late, and the sunrise and friend Lightray await us in the gleaming city of the gods." OKAY!
Tragically, almost every New Gods appearance after this is complete dogshit, although there is a great moment in Hal Jordan and the Green Lantern Corps (a Rebirth series) where they need information from Orion but he's comatose so they bring in a telepath and the only word he can get out of Orion's mind is "Lightray." I'LL BET.
IN CONCLUSION: Orion and Lightray love each other so so much and I believe it is honoring Jack Kirby's legacy to think about them smooching. It's what the King would have wanted!
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kindaasrikal · 2 days
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Exploring the stupidity of the fact that Morro and Garmadon are stuck in the departed realm together, part 2:
Garmadon: Alright Morro, let’s at least try and get to know each other.
Morro: what do you not get, Garmadon? I don’t WANT to know anything about you, or your pathetic life.
Garmadon: Well, if only you had a choice in the matter.
Morro: *tied to a tree after coming across a wild Garmageddon*…i demand a rematch.
Garmadon: Sure!
Morro:…really?-
Garmadon: After we get to know each other, of course!
Morro: i demand freedom.
Garmadon: Uhuh. *pulls out a stack of papers* By any chance, have you ever heard of 21 questions? It’s quite an entertaining game Lloyd introduced to me. *he says with a nostalgic smile*
Morro: yeah, that brat tried playing it with me when i took away his free will.
Garmadon:…You always have to make things difficult, don’t you?
Morro: no sh-mmph!
Garmadon: *covers Morro’s mouth, who is now wriggling around like a trapped chicken* Enough of that. Now let’s see…*he flicks through some of the papers* ah ha!
Garmadon: My first question, child, shall be finding out your most favourite colour!
Morro:
Garmadon:
Morro:
Garmadon:…I see that was a foolish question to ask, so let us move to a different one-
Morro: ifti pifksbsv
Garmadon: What?
Morro: *glares at Garmadon*
Garmadon: Ah, right. *removes his hand* what is it that you said?
Morro: it’s pink.
Garmadon: Huh.
Morro: pink. Thats my favourite colour.
Garmadon:
Garmadon: Hm
Morro: shut up.
Garmadon: I didn’t say a word.
Morro: i can see your face, you old fart.
Garmadon: Well, is it my fault green seemed more likelier than pink?
Morro: don’t ever say i like green. That colour disgusts me.
Garmadon:…Is it because-
Morro: your son’s eyes only made the disgust worse, not create it.
Garmadon: Aren’t you a sweet one, child.
Garmadon: Morro.
Morro:
Garmadon: Morro?
Morro:
Garmadon: Morro, now is not the time to ignore me.
Morro:
Garmadon: Are you really going to act so childish, simply because I had made you call me uncle once?
Morro:
Garmadon: Child.
Morro:
Garmadon: Nephew.
Morro: *a slight twitch has occurred.*
Garmadon:…..
Morro:…….
Garmadon:…..
Morro:…….
Garmadon: Morro Wu, stop ignoring me this insta-
Garmadon:
Garmadon: Now, I highly doubt throwing the top of a mountain at me will help.
Morro: you know, i always wanted to ask you or Sensei this.
Garmadon: *sitting in a meditative position* Hm?
Morro: why’d the First spinjitzu master name you Garmadon Garmadon?
Garmadon:…My meditation can wait, excuse me???
Morro: i mean, seriously, Garmadon Garmadon sounds ridiculous. No wonder you turned evil, i would too if i was given such a dumb name. Not to mention, where the heck did he even get the name Garmadon from? Like, i understand Wu, that one makes sense, but Garmadon? It sounds like the name of some weird species of animals thats only just been discovered or something.
Garmadon: Pot, meet kettle.
Morro: what
Garmadon: Nothing. Now, why exactly do you think my name is Garmadon Garmadon?
Morro: uh, your son? His last name is Garmadon?
Garmadon: Do you mean Lloyd?
Morro: what, do you have a secret son hidden away or something?? Yes, the Green Ninja!
Garmadon:….Child, why exactly do you think I call you Morro Wu, instead of Morro Garmadon?
Morro: cause your name’s ugly?
Garmadon: You really are your father’s son.
Morro: wu is nOT MY FATHER-
Morro: why are you so old.
Garmadon: What-
Morro: but not bald?
Garmadon: *baffled* Just because I am old, does not mean I would go bald, Morro.
Morro: but…
Garmadon: Hm?
Morro: Wu is bald, and he’s younger then you, why do you have hair???
Garmadon:
Morro:
Morro: Oh my GOD. YOU WEAR A WIG???
Garmadon: NO I DO NOT STOP SCREAMING-
Yeah thats all i got, rlly long ones that im not even sure are good but i find them funny and i have school work so maybe thats effecting my humour atm :(
Anyways i love the Morro and Garmadon duo and if you havent heard in my last few posts i gave them a duo name. Heres more of the Tempest duo!
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dwaekkicidal · 14 hours
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Thoughts on daddy Jeongin?
wait why have i never thought about this…
warnings: gn!reader, exhibitionism, mean dom + brat taming on the last few paragraphs
posting this because the Changbin worship is taking me a little longer than I thought..
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so im a firm believer that jeongin is STILL a menace to this day. like we all know he was a little shithead growing up, but i think the way skz spoils him just made that side of him come back out. especially with the video of him literally choking seungmin and nobody batting an eye (also him stopping the SECOND he saw the camera pointed at them??? yeah keep trying to put up that 'innocent' mask. i see through ur lies mfer), I genuinely don't think he's as innocent as they make him out to be lol
anywhooooo back to Daddy Jeongin..
I think in general Daddy Jeongin is sickly sweet with you even in public. He doesn’t hesitate to buy you items he sees you looking at for longer than a few seconds at a store or just random things he thinks you would like. He takes you out on dates when you least expect it and always has a little gift prepared for you for these dates. I also think he would LOVE to dress you up/pick out your outfits every day if you'd let him, and even more so for dates so you two can match.
"Today we're going to [insert restaurant]! I bought you a new outfit for it and everything~"
I think he's one to keep PDA to a minimum (besides hand holding). UNLESS you ask nicely or there is a person who is very obviously interested in you and is 'unaware' of your relationship. Then, Daddy Jeongin is going a liiiiittle unhinged. They want to play dumb? He'll play absolutely brainless. I'm talking straight up shoving a hand into your pants or up your shirt, grabbing a handful and making you squirm as the person watches. Will not hesitate to walk up to you and interrupt your conversation with that person just to shove his tongue down your throat <3
"I don't give a fuck if it made them uncomfortable. You're mine."
I think in bed Daddy Jeongin would be super inexperienced at first if you're his first lover. Shaky hands hesitantly trailing along your body along your body and soft but hungry hip thrusts for the first few times. But!!!! I'm a firm believer in Fast Learner!Skz so it won't take him long to learn your body and what you do or don't like. So much so that once he proves himself right time and time again, he starts to be a cocky little shit about it.
"I know it 's good. Daddy just knows you too well, baby. And I know *this* feels good too, right? Haha"
Daddy Jeongin definitely invites one (or more hehe) of his hyungs to fuck you open >< Allowing them to fuck any and all of your holes all while he controls the scene, the pace, and where they cum. I think the ego this would give him would be nuts… It would hover in the air around him for weeks, ESPECIALLY if it’s one of the guys that he respects/looks up to the most (I’m thinking Chris, Min, and maybe Seungmin).
"You're doing so good for us baby, you're taking Min so well. He's gonna keep fucking you nice and roughly and if you keep it up and maybe you'll get both of us."
I think he loves a brat (obviously at the right times) so he has an excuse to prove why he's the dominant one. I think he'd have 2 very similar ways of dealing with brats, I won't make a separate post about it like I did with Chris but I'll still explain some of it. The default way Daddy Jeongin deals with one is by being a huge brat back and matching your energy. You push his buttons, he pushes your buttons. You test his boundaries, he’ll test yours. Has a whole stubborn ass "anything you can do, I can do better" attitude and won't stop until you give up and submit first. Not afraid to edge both of your for hours if that's what it takes for you to fold.
"You ready to say sorry? Mmm that's too bad. I was looking forward to letting you cum tonight."
2nd way Daddy Jeongin deals with a brat is full Mean dom. You push the right wrong buttons at the right wrong times and he won't show any mercy. How can he when he learned how to be a mean dom from the best! (Seungmin) So when you talk back, have too much attitude, and/or any other way you manage to piss him off; you are getting a big hand wrapped tightly around your neck or long fingers shoved down your throat to shut you up. Edges both of you here too but will end up cumming inside you before you get to finish and threatens to leave you like that if you don't say sorry. OR will overstimulate you until you're actually sobbing and squirming so much that he threatens to tie you down.
"Maybe if you didn't act like a bitch I would be more willing to give you a break. Now shut up and take it." >.<
Daddy Jeongin who isn’t afraid to punish or discipline you in front of his hyungs. If you piss him off at practice he WILL make you kneel right then and there, in front of all the members and any staff, and will make you apologize. Tangles a hand in your hair, maybe even shoving a few fingers down your throat, and makes you grovel. Also I think if you catch him at the wrong time, he'll threaten to fuck you right then and there (and will actually go through with it depending on who is there and if he's actually mad enough).
“Aw.. you’re embarrassed they’re watching? Good, maybe you’ll learn your fucking lesson this time. Now apologize or I'll edge you on my dick for the next week.”
Continuing a little on that last paragraph, I think he would enjoy bringing in Seungmin (AND) or Minho to 'help' him tame you when you're a brat. It's definitely something that would have to be talked about with all parties, but if everyone agrees to it then you're in for some insane sessions. If you piss him off in the practice room and the people in there just so happen to be Seungmin and Minho, just know you're fucked <3
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theitgirlnetwork · 12 hours
Text
Earn It
Ch. 7: Heaven's Happiness
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Note: As always, the love this story receives amazes me. Thank you so much for reading. Thank you for the notes, the reblogs, the comments and messages. Interacting makes this so much fun! I hope you all enjoy this chapter. There will be a lot more time skips from here on out! So you'll all get to know the gang as adults. I will ask that if anyone wants to use my story as inspo for one of your own, or anything else, you let me know, it's more fun that way. I also don't post this or any of my other stuff anywhere else. Once again, hi to my best friend who now reads this story, love you miss girl <3 Anywayyy, I hope you all enjoy! Thanks for reading <3
Taglist:@spookystitchery@anehkael@fkaams@butterflyybabe@sun2flower @holierthancunt @silkenthusiasts @wolflover384 @liziihorta @summerssover @jackierose902109
Warnings: Some strong language
“She’s very gifted, Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock. The best I’ve seen at this age in my career. You could have a professional dancer on your hands.”
The three adults watch from the observing window as Heaven demonstrates Grand Adage for a group of her peers. Her little back straight and stomach tight as she accomplishes the move with a stern discipline that many adults struggle to achieve. 
“We know. So why is she playing Clara?” 
“Beatrice-”
“I’m just wondering, Luca, I mean I just believe it’s our right as her parents to ask Madame Sidorov why our 9 year old daughter is teaching the snowflakes that are twice her age the dance she doesn’t get to be a part of.” 
Madame Sidorov swallows hard as she brings her clipboard to her chest. She’s been running her youth dance company for over 20 years. Many of her dancers have gone on to be successful, working artists. But she’d never seen talent like Heaven Whitlock. The girl came into her studio at the age of 6, excited to show her that she already knew how to go en pointe even though children really shouldn’t and normally couldn’t do it until they were 11. Madame Sidorov had been overcome with excitement. She had a star on her hands. 
The older woman also learned that Beatrice Whitlock also knew what she had. The teacher has dealt with gunner parents before, but none like the stern young woman who trailed in behind her prodigy daughter with her nose in the sky and demands on her tongue. 
“Mrs. Whitlock, Clara is the lead role in the Nutcracker-”
“Bullshit, Sidorov, we both know that the prima dancer role is the Sugar Plum Fairy and the arguably most complicated dance is the Waltz of the Snowflakes, the dance you had my daughter demonstrating yesterday. So,” Beatrice’s heels click as she shifts her weight from one leg to another, hip jutting out. “Why is your best dancer playing the dumb little girl who spends most of the ballet watching everyone else dance?”
“I think my wife is frustrated because we all know our daughter is talented. So we’re having a hard time understanding why those talents aren’t being showcased.” Luca cuts, wrapping an arm around his wife’s waist in an attempt to calm her. 
“Heaven is only 9. We need to allow the older dancers to play the more advanced roles-” 
“Then they should be better.” Beatrice interrupts, swinging her purse over her shoulder, pushing her shades up onto her head. “How about this, until your priorities are straight, we can take Heaven somewhere where things are fair and you can dust off your pointe shoes and start teaching again instead of using my child.”
“But, all of my friends go there.” Heaven whines as they speed their way down the highway for the hour drive back to their home. “I don’t want to find another studio.”
“I know, Stellina, but we want you to have every opportunity. Wouldn’t you want more chances to dance?”
Heaven is stubbornly silent in the backseat, her step father softly pats her foot, reaching back from the driver seat. Her mother turns to face her, a noncommittal look on her face. “Baby, when you came to Mommy a couple years ago, what did you say you wanted to be when you grew up?”
The younger girl bites her lip, tugging irritably at her seatbelt. “A ballerina.”
“Just a ballerina?”
Heaven huffs, crossing her arms over her chest, looking away from her mother. “The best ballerina ever.”
“The best ballerina. Ever. And Mommy and Papino have worked very hard to make that possible for you, yes? Practice everyday, paying for lessons, buying you everything you need. But you’re a big girl now. You’re going to have to learn how to work very hard too if you want to be the best, baby. We can only take you part of the way. You need to think super hard about whether this is what you want. You need to think about if you’re going to earn it.”
Beatrice’s voice is soft and kind, but her words are harsh. She turns around, not waiting for a response from her daughter, satisfied that her whines and complaints had quieted to obedient, stifled little sniffles. 
Heaven stares down at her hands through wet lashes, her bottom lip wobbling as she smothers her sadness. She does want it. She wants to be the best ballerina ever. She is going to be the best ballerina ever. And she’s grateful. Papino and Mommy had given a lot. And she won’t disappoint them. So she’d go to a new dance studio. She would make new friends. And if not, that wasn’t what she was there for. 
Luca Whitlock frowns as he drums his finger on the steering wheel, looking forward at the traffic ahead of them. “How about some ice cream, Stellina? Might cheer you up?” 
Identical sets of brown eyes meet in the rearview mirror. The little girl in the backseat simply sinks against the leather, forcing indifference into her voice. “No thank you, Papino, I’m…not hungry.”
“And you have your, um,” Heaven scratches her head, mentally scrolling through the list of items Tashi would need at home. She was going to spend the first few weeks post-knee surgery with her parents. Heaven had stayed with her girlfriend for the days following the injury, lying to her school and telling them she had a death in the family that required her to take some time away. She just wanted to get Tashi settled before she headed back to UCLA. 
The dancer had assumed that their boyfriend would emerge out of the shadows, and use his charm to weasel out of an apology, ultimately taking over Tashi’s care since he had the most free time.
Unfortunately, he continued to disappoint her. So, instead, she lingered. Slept in Tashi’s bed with her, unwrapped and rewrapped her knee. Cleaned her dorm, brought her any work she missed. The girls in the athletic dorm thought she’d moved in. But now, Tashi’s parents were here to take her home for a little while. 
“I have everything, Hev, you made sure of that.” 
Her heart aches. Tashi sounds so tired. So down. Heaven is so frustrated. She’s ready to move past this part. She wants Tashi to just be better. She tells herself over and over that the surgery would fix it. That once she got the treatment she needs and a little physical therapy, she’d be back to where she was, ready to take over the world with her. 
“I’ll see you when we open, right? You’re still gonna come?” Heaven rocks on her feet, careful not to bump Tashi’s crutch. “You don’t have to, you’ve seen me do most of the dances and I know it might be hard to travel-”
“Babe, I’ll be there. Okay? I need to go.” Tashi lifts Heaven’s chin, giving her a halfhearted peck before turning to climb into her dad’s truck, gesturing for Heaven to stop when she goes to try helping her into the high seated vehicle. “I’ll call you. Why don’t you have Art help you get your stuff from my room? He probably wants to say goodbye.”
“T, are we gonna talk more about that-”
“I told you,” Tashi shrugs, hand on the car door handle, her pajama pants poorly covering the large brace on her knee. “M’not mad. It’s fine.”
It’s not fine. Heaven isn’t stupid. Ever since Tashi and Patrick found out that she’d done…stuff with Art, Patrick has been radio silent, and all Tashi does is encourage Heaven to spend more time with Art who she was decidedly avoiding. She’d gotten…caught up in the infirmary. The combination of the heightened emotions and Art’s soft attention and care caused another moment of weakness. She’d accidentally said something that she’d been denying to herself ever since, and thanking the good lord above that Art had apparently missed. She was determined not to tempt fate for a…fourth time?
Which is why she’d gone back to Tashi’s room and started packing her stuff and straightening up without alerting the blond tennis player who’d been haunting her dreams as of late. And it’s also why she almost pissed herself when he’d somehow materialized in the dorm room doorway, rapping his knuckles against the light wood, in a failed attempt not to startle her.
“I didn’t mean to scare you, but, um, Tashi texted me and said you might need some help getting this stuff to your car.” 
He looks good. She can’t ignore that, but she can refuse to get caught up in staring at him as he leans in the doorway, muscled arms on full display as he leans in the frame, a poorly hidden pout on his face. 
“I’m good.” Heaven shrugs, slinging her bookbag over her shoulder, trying to lift her purse and her other two bags at the same time, only to have all of her belongings fall out of her purse. “Fuck.”
“Fuck, let me help you.” Art bends and starts grabbing the miscellaneous items from her bag.
“I can do it-”
“It’ll be quicker-”
“Art.” She huffs, tucking her hair behind her ears and sitting criss-crossed on the floor. “I meant it, when I said that I was done…Tashi might be trying to teach me a lesson in some kind of twisted way, and I’m sorry you’re getting mixed up in it, but I’m…I can’t be around you and be with her at the same time. Clearly, I can’t handle boundaries.”
“So…so what does that mean? Not talking at all? Is that what you want?” He asks, shoulders dropping, eyes filled with hurt as he inches closer. “Heaven-”
“Sure. If that’s what it takes for it to get you to get I can’t do” she gestures between them. “This, then fine, let’s say that’s what I want.” 
Art clenches his jaw, blinking quickly as he tries to think something he could say. Anything to change her mind. “Heaven, please, I’ll…we’d be friends. We can just, I can’t…please don’t.” he finishes, giving up on trying to articulate his thoughts through his panicked haze. Through all of this back and forth, chasing and running, he’d forgotten the chance that once Patrick was out of the picture, that he might get written out too. 
His eyes scan her face as she shakes her head, shoving the last of her stuff back into her purse and standing. “Art, it’s not like I don’t wanna be around you. But stuff is getting too complicated. This shit is just too much. I haven’t been back to my school in days, Tashi’s leg is fucked and I don’t want to make things any harder for her, Patrick is just fucking gone and I really can’t handle anything more. So when you say we can be friends, I need you to mean it. I need you to tell me we can do that.”
Art finds himself in between a rock and a hard place. He wants to be honest. He wants to acknowledge that he can’t see himself getting over her within the foreseeable future. He wants to tell her that he’s glad she’s probably not with Patrick anymore, and as bad as he feels about Tashi’s leg, he quite frankly does not understand why it has to change anything between them. 
But he’s desperate. Art is humiliated to admit it to himself but, he would do anything to keep the line of communication between him and Heaven open so if he had to appease her by saying that they would be platonic despite the fact that he quite literally gets dizzy standing next to her, fine. Like he’d told himself before, he was playing the long game, collecting the points that matter. So, offering her a tight smile, Art sticks his large hand out to her, encasing her smaller one and jumping to stand at his full height. “Friends. But, friends don’t ignore each other for days, Hev.” 
Heaven bites her lower lip, choosing to ignore the blue-brown eyes that drop to her mouth before looking back up at her and shaking his hand. “Okay. Yeah.” The pair slowly pull their hands apart, Heaven shivers as she feels the calluses on his palm slide across her hand. “As my friend, can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“Is,” the girl rolls her eyes to the ceiling, releasing a heavy sigh. “Is she done? You saw it, and you obviously know more than me…is that something she can keep playing with her knee like that?”
He can’t bring himself to dash the hope she was clearly harboring on the behalf of Tashi but the girl’s recovery is…unlikely. Art tucks his hands in his pockets, tilting his head as he chooses his words carefully. “Tashi’s strong, and really fucking good, if anyone is going to recover from that kind of injury, it’s her.”
“So…no.” Heaven sits down on Tashi’s bed, staring forward at the wall that’s littered with pictures of some of the best tennis players in the world. A shaky breath leaves her as she stares at the professional posters, accompanied by the posters Adidas had made with Tashi on them. 
“You’re a really good girlfriend.” Art whispers.
“I cheated on her with you. I’m pretty much the worst girlfriend ever.”
“No, I mean, you’re really invested in her. In the thing she loves, like you care about tennis the same way we do, f-for her.” 
Heaven smiles softly to herself, grabbing Tashi’s pillow and hugging it to her body. “I fell in love with Tashi watching her play tennis. Just like everyone else does.” she jokes, poking Art’s leg with her toe. “When I’m watching her, it’s like I’m getting to witness something. It’s…corny but tennis is her calling. She goes to some other little world when she’s playing, and, even though I’m not a tennis player, she takes me with her. It’s this feeling of closeness that I can’t get anywhere else, you know?” Or at least, nowhere else I’m willing to talk about.
He does know. Art does know exactly what she’s talking about. He felt it. Once, when he and Patrick sat and watched Tashi play for the first time. It’s an all encompassing feeling. He was so caught up in watching her every move that he hadn’t looked anywhere but at Tashi. If he’d just looked three rows in front of him he’d have seen the girl in front of him now. 
The second time, the feeling was more intense, more of a sensation than a mere feeling. It was when he was sitting in an empty theater, watching Heaven dance, just for him. Art had never felt the things he’d felt before. He’d never had the thoughts he thought. He’d held his breath for the entire minute and 26 seconds that she gave him. He sat on the edge of the red, fabric auditorium seat, scared to blink and get left behind. He wanted to capture the feeling and keep it forever. And he has. He’s kept it. And everytime she gives him another taste, a smile, a kiss, a laugh, a touch, he goes back to being alone in the theater, experiencing euphoria for the very first time. 
If that’s the feeling Tashi gives Heaven, then he’s very jealous. And he wants it.
And that’s another new feeling the girls introduced him to. He’d never wanted something like her…or…uh them. 
Jealousy. Longing. Needing. 
Art knew exactly what Patrick was talking about when he said he liked seeing him fired up about something. Because, as much as he loves tennis, it didn’t make his blood boil. It didn’t make his stomach muscles clench with intensity. He didn’t feel that satisfying nervous burn. Not until…
Art needs to test a theory.
He scratches the back of his head, looking down at his sneakers before clearing his throat. “Uh, so, Hev, I’ve got a match this afternoon. And, I know things are weird right now, so you might think I’m a dick for even asking-”
“Arthur.”
“Come watch me play.” He blurts. Heaven’s eyes widen and he finds himself taking a tentative step forward as if he was trying to soothe a spooked horse. “I don’t know, I just figured…I mean, you might miss watching someone play, with Tashi taking a break and Patrick being…himself.” When Heaven continues to look unsure, Art puts himself out there again, trying to entice her the way he knows how. He moves to stand in front of where she’s seated on the bed, crouching to be just below her level. “When I win it will be for you. I’d like you to be there.” Art carefully tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear, before grabbing her chin between his thumb and index finger, moving her face around playfully. “As a friend.”
As a friend. That’s exactly what Heaven repeats to herself, over and over when she carries her bags over to the tennis courts, placing one foot onto the metal bleacher and opting to sit in the seats down on the front to rows. Just so she can see better. And it’ll be easier to slip out before the match is over. Besides, she couldn’t bring herself to sit with the women’s tennis players towards the top. All she could think of when she saw them was that it should have been one of their legs cracking instead of Tashi’s and it didn’t exactly make her feel like a great person. 
She slips into the seat and crosses her legs, struggling as she pushes her overnight bag under the low seat.
“Hey, let me help you.” A blonde girl crouches beside her, pushing along with Heaven and getting the back underneath. 
“Oh,” Heaven offers her a bright smile. “Thanks, I have to head back to my school after this so I have all my shit with me, didn’t think I was gonna come.”
“No problem,” the girl chirps, plopping down into the seat next to Heaven. “Sara. Myles’ girlfriend, he’s playing after this first match. Whose girlfriend are you?”
Tashi’s name is on the tip of her tongue. She swears it is. But the girl is clearly talking about the players that were starting to filter in, with their red shirts that Heaven could see fitting Art perfectly from her seat. His blond curls flopping as his head moves side to side, she knows he’s looking for her. Heaven gives a soft wave to catch his attention and can’t help but match his smile when he spots her, waving back. “I’m not dating a player.”
“Well these are girlfriend seats, so don’t let anyone else hear you say that.” Sara says lightly, pulling her shades down over her eyes. 
Heaven turns to look at her, tearing her eyes away from Art stretching. “What the hell are girlfriend seats?”
“They’re seats…where girlfriends sit?” The girl sits up to get a pixelated picture of her boyfriend on her razor. “You know, the players’ girls sit, so they can see them. No wonder I don’t recognize you, you’re a plant.”
“I’m Heaven, I don’t go here, I’m just watching my friend before I go back to UCLA.” 
“Oh, shit,” Sara’s eyes widen in realization. “You’re Donaldson’s girl right? Myles’ cousin Kyle, trust me I know the names kill me too, but he was saying how Donaldson brought his hot girlfriend out with them the other night and was dick trying to show off for her.” 
“Again, we’re friends, m’not his girl.”
“Hey, Hev!” Sara ducks her head, watching out of her peripheral as Art jogs over, racket in hand, pushing up onto the fence so he could be eye level with Heaven. “Match is about to start, kiss for good luck?” He grins, holding his racket handle out to her. He playfully pouts until she gives in, leaning forward and pressing her glossed lips to the handle, looking at Art through her lashes. The blond wets his bottom lip and pulls the racket back. “Eyes on me, okay?” 
“Whatever, just remember you promised me a win.” Heaven giggles, crossing her arms as she settles back into her seat. Art beams even wider, hopping down off of the fence and jogging backwards back to where the players sit. “And spit out your gum!”
Faintly, she could hear Art’s teammates reprimanding him for ‘making the rest of them look bad’ and she smiles to herself, bringing a hand up to play with her name chain.
“Girl.” Sara snorts.
“Just friends.”
“Yeah sure.” the blonde girl shrugs, pushing her shades back down. “Don’t tell me, tell Donaldson.”
Art delivers a win, as promised. It wasn’t hard, really. One thing Patrick had gotten right was that college kids weren’t really much competition. And maybe he had some very good motivation sitting out in the crowd with her eyes locked on him. So he showed off a little, served a little harder, made the other guy run a little bit more than necessary. He could always explain that away as wanting to impress his coach and any possible reps looking to endorse him. And sure, he might’ve looked over at her for each point he wrenched out of the poor guy from Temple’s hands but…well he didn’t have an excuse for that other than it gave him a rush knowing that she is sitting pretty, legs crossed, perched with the other girlfriends, watching him, rooting for him, breathing heavy for him. 
When matchpoint is declared his, Art smiles cockily, strolling up to the net and shaking hands with his opponent before making his way over to Heaven again, this time climbing completely over the fence, leaving behind his tennis bag on the opposite side of the court. This time she stands, catching him a little as he lands in the small space in front of her and the fence. “Well?” he pants, lifting his hat to adjust his hair before placing it back on his head. 
“Well, what? You want me to say congratulations?” Heaven grins, sweeping some sweat that dripped from his forehead off of his cheek. “Congratulations, Arthur.” she hums.
“Thank you.”
“Mhm.”
“Yeah,” Sarah calls from her seat, smiling smugly up at the pair. “Good job, Donaldson. Why don’t you try to pass some of that mojo to Myles, huh? Getting kinda tired of coming out to these things just to watch you play.”
“I’ve got a lucky charm, that’s all.” Art nudges Heaven, wrapping an arm around her waist so she doesn’t stumble too far away from him.
“Yeah, so, lucky, or the other guy sucks and Art is good-”
“No, I think you’re my lucky charm, don’t try to ruin it-” Art laughs, taking his hat off again, his messy blond hair falling all over as he places it on Heaven’s head, holding her to him as she squirms.
“Ew, Arthur, it's sweaty!”
“It’s the fruit of my labor, Hev, that win was for you!”
Sarah scoffs, shaking her head as she watches the pair, leaning away to avoid getting hit when Art lifts Heaven, swinging her to the opposite side of him to help her get to the steps before grabbing her bags. As she sees him guide her by her waist down the bleachers, both of them cheesing as they chat as if no one else was there and she realizes that Art is leaving the courts before his fellow teammates play, Sarah commends her own instincts.
And then she makes a note to herself to start saving the returning girlfriend seat next to hers for Heaven. The other girls were sort’ve bitches, anyway.
“So, I should head back.” Heaven leans back against the driver door of her car, clasping her hands together behind her. “But, this got my mind off of things for a little, so thank you.”
“It’s what friends are for.” Art laughs, stepping in front of her, hand behind his neck.
“Pft, you’re such a dick. Aren’t you supposed to be the nice one?”
“I am nice.” he smiles, rocking on his feet, feeling his chest tighten as Heaven bites her rose petal bottom lip again. His eyes soften as he stares down at her delicate features and thinks about how right things feel when they’re together. How he hasn’t felt this good in…ever. “So nice, I’m not gonna say what I want to say. I’m just gonna say,” he takes her hand gently, toying with her fingers, pushing her thumb with his own, “goodnight.”
Heaven’s lips part, and looking up into his eyes, how kindly he looks down at her. What she can see in them almost does it. She almost got lost, just like that. But a buzz in her jacket pocket has her grabbing her phone and the message has her taking a small step backward and placing her hand on her door handle. “Goodbye, Art.”
“One two three, one two three, and Peter please keep up with Heaven, Heaven a little less hatred on your face, thank you, two three and up, I want her in the air-” Madame Fontaine claps her hands to the pace of the movements she wants from her two leads, following them as they move across the floor. Heaven holds her breath as she’s lifted into the air for two counts before she’s slid down Peter’s body, draping herself across him romantically as he kneels to accommodate her. “Yes, that is exactly it. Now kiss.”
Heaven feels herself wince, squeezing her eyes shut as she feels Peter’s lips press against hers.
“Still doesn’t look good, Madame.” Fallon calls from her seat. 
“No, no it doesn’t, does it? You two, what’s the issue, tu veux m'humilier et me faire me suicider ou quoi?”
“No, Madame,” Heaven huffs, swatting Peter’s hand away from her waist. “We don’t want to humiliate you or make you kill yourself, I don’t understand why we have to do the version with the kiss, there are plenty of variations without it-”
“You understood her?” Peter squints at the girl next to him before huffing, “Fine, whatever, MacMillan intended for there to be passion between Romeo and Juliet, and you curl your lip up everytime I kiss you.”
“I don’t like doing it.” Heaven shrugs. “I’m a professional dancer, not a porn star, and I’m playing a 15 year old girl, I don’t know why any sane, adult audience would want to watch me lay on top and kiss a grown man and then kill myself to be with him-”
“We open tonight. We are doing the ballet as we rehearsed, you two will kiss and you will tolerate it. Practice if you must, pretend he’s someone else, take a shot before you do it, I don’t care.”
“Madame, we’re 19.”
“Oh please.” The older woman storms off, her assistant behind her and the two dancers are left side by side. 
“So…should we practice?”
“Absolutely fucking not, thank you very much.” Heaven pushes past Peter, snatching her dance bag from the floor. “You’re gonna practice until your knees bleed for the next hour and then you’re gonna soak in the athletic building so you’re actually ready for tonight and I’m gonna go…I don’t know, pray.” 
As Heaven storms away, dramatically slamming the theater door behind her, she can recognize she was in a bitchy mood. She felt like she had a lot of shit to be annoyed about and was frankly pissed to feel her world collapsing around her on the first night of her first college role in which she’s the fucking prima. 
First, she once again demonstrated to herself that she has absolutely no fucking self control when it comes to Art Donaldson, a truth that she’s learned about herself that really agitates her. She discovered this as she struggled into the routine of only responding to the blond every couple of days and found herself sitting up in the privacy of her own dorm, reading and rereading every message she sent, the bright light of her phone shining brightly on her shame.
Second, she still hadn’t heard from her boyfriend (ex?), Patrick. She’d watched a couple of his matches while she was on the treadmill at the gym and as he does, he wins the first two rounds only to lose in the third. He found time to get lazy in his tennis playing but failed to pick up his goddamn phone and call either of his girlfriends.
Which leads to the third thing haunting her. Tashi is fucking irritable as shit. Apparently, surgery does not agree with her, because Tashi had been crabby for the last few days. It started with the day of Art’s match when she’d sent her perfectly timed message. 'Did he win?' It was like she was taunting her. Like Tashi knew Heaven couldn't stay away. It pisses Heaven off even more that she was right. Then Tashi had moved on to venting about how Patrick was absolutely wasting his talent, how the fact that he’s not winning pisses her off even more now that she can’t play. How she’s going pro as soon as she gets the chance because if this injury told her anything, it was that there was no time to wait. How now that she’s got time on her hands, she’s been thinking more about her plan for her life and Heaven’s.
And lastly, the real kicker, what had Heaven gritting her teeth as she did bar warmups this morning, was that fucking phone call. The one from her mother that she received at 5:00am when she was stretching. The one where her mother said she wouldn’t be able to make it to her first night of her first ballet in college in which she’s the fucking prima. And when she expressed her disappointment, Beatrice responded ‘It’s just a school ballet, I’ll come to your first professional one.’ 
So, yep, she was in a shitty fucking mood. 
But she wouldn’t let all of that stop her debut as an adult dancer. She was going to be a pro, she was going to do it her way, even if the 5 seats she had reserved in the front row were empty. 
So, she sits at the vanity backstage, putting her hair into Juliet’s first hairstyle. She listens to music that reminds her of when she was 15 to get into the right headspace as she puts blush on her cheeks. She offers Peter a soft smile when she sees him in his costume and forces herself to try to look at him the right way. Because the things that are pissing her off don’t matter right now. Right now, all there is is Juliet.
It doesn’t matter if Heaven’s smile is fake as the lights shine down on her when she first prances her way onto the stage. Juliet’s smile is real. It’s meaningless if Heaven’s tears are real when she squints and sees that her mother’s seat is indeed empty, her stepfather attempting to send her a thumbs up to distract from the woman’s absence. And so what, if Heaven can’t go to her happy place as she solos because she sees both Patrick and Tashi’s seats are empty as well. As long as she can still breezily get through her motions, as long as it looks beautiful for the crowd, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t fucking matter.
And it definitely doesn’t matter, that as she came out of her fake balcony in her sleep gown to blow everyone’s minds with the most loving, fucking passionate pas de deux they’d ever seen, she accidentally caught eyes with Art in the audience, staring up at her intensely. 
So she doesn’t have to feel guilty that when she kissed Peter, she envisioned him with curly blond hair and heterochromatic eyes. Or the fact that Madame Fontaine told her when she stepped off stage to change into her next costume that it was the most romantic, realistic kiss she’d ever seen.
Does Art know he's stupid? Absolutely. He's never dared call himself intelligent. He didn't need the little voice that sounds like Patrick calling him pussywhipped. He knows. But, he still found himself on the highway, traveling at a breakneck speed, eyeing the bouquet of flowers that he has placed in the seat.
He'd known Heaven was serious about this whole friend thing. She's so good, and kind. And she cares so much about Tashi and Patrick. But Art knows he can treat her better. He's sure of it. Despite what he knows to be true, Art refuses to pressure her...anymore. He'd just rely on the fact that if they were supposed to be together like he believed they should be, they would be. Eventually. Soon. Hopefully.
So he came fully ready to play the dutiful friend. He was gonna stand politely by as Heaven leapt into Patrick's arms after the show. Art was gonna smile politely as she and Tashi shared kisses and exchanged giggles as they talked about inside jokes that they only understood. But then he got there. He'd been directed to the front where the two premier dancers families were arranged to sit and found three empty seats separating him from a man with peppered hair and smart looking glasses who had his own bouquet of flowers across his lap and a Chanel gift bag next to his feet. As he inches into his seat the man looks at him with a smile.
"You must be Patrick. I'm Heaven's stepfather, Luca Whitlock, I'm sorry I missed you at her birthday." The older man holds his hand out to Art with a kind smile. "Nice to meet you."
Art offers him his own awkward grin, accepting the tight squeeze of the man's hand. "Uh, no, I'm Heaven's friend, Art. It's really nice to meet you Mr. Whitlock."
"You as well." The man lifts his wrist to check his watch. "Show is meant to start in a few minutes, hopefully he will be here shortly. Stellina won't like for her boyfriend to be late.
Art shifts uncomfortably again, checking his phone. Patrick had reached out to him a couple days after Tashi's injuries. Mostly to make insults thinly veiled as jokes, clearly still pissed that he yelled at him. Art responded with short, one worded messages.
It's the least they'd ever spoken since they'd met.
The guilt he feels for his part in this fight they were having is very real. But it was currently heavily outweighed by his annoyance at the fact that his friend was seemingly punishing Heaven by not showing up for her big night. He knew Patrick didn't deserve her, and he was only proving his point.
"Is Tashi with Mrs. Whitlock or..."
"Oh, my, my wife couldn't make it. And Tashi is still...healing. Her mother called right before I was supposed to pick her up."
Oh. "Oh."
As much as he's glad he could be here for Heaven, he knows that Tashi and her mother being there would mean more. His heart aches for her as he settles back into his seat and the lights dim. The pain he feels for her only intensifies when he sees her step out onto the stage. She's beautiful. The perfect Juliet. If anyone would make a man fall in love within a few glances, ready to die at the thought of not being with her, Heaven would be it.
Her eyes are sad as she eyes the empty seats, using them as a tragic point of focus as she completes her expert turns. Behind him he could hear people whispering about how gorgeous the girl playing Juliet was, how talented she is. All Art can think is that they have no idea. They don't know how she's managing to be so elegant, so beautiful, so perfect, even as she's in the type of pain she's in.
Art would do anything to bring the light back into her eyes so they would shine the way the rest of her was.
He loves her.
He knows it. He feels it as her eyes finally make their way to his seat and her smile is a little more real. A little bit of light slips back into her eyes. She dances even more beautifully, more genuinely than before. And his mind is filled with the same thought.
Yes baby, that's right. Eyes on me. I'll make it better. I'll make you happy.
And he means it. Friends or not. Lovers or not.
It's on Heaven's first night of her first ballet in college where she's the fucking prima ballerina that Art makes a vow to himself.
He was gonna dedicate himself to Heaven Whitlock's happiness. No matter what that meant.
3 Years Later (California)(Age: 22):
Tashi shakes her head to herself as she watches Art pace in the kitchen. She brings her coffee to her lips, blowing at the smoke slowly as she observes him from the couch, taking a small sip before setting the mug loudly on the glass coffee table. She rolls her eyes when he doesn’t stop his steadily paced steps across the floor.  “You good?”
The blond finally pauses to look at her, jaw clenching and unclenching before he opens his mouth to speak. “This is just different, you know?”
“How? It’s still tennis.” 
“It’s pros, Tashi, I’m just nervous.” Art says, running his hand through his blond curls. “These guys are good.”
“You’re fucking good.” She asserts, crossing her arms. “Look, I can’t make you believe in yourself. If you can’t do this, please, let me know now, because I need to know if you’re not going to make this happen. We have a deal.” 
Art sighs, planting his hands down on the counter, staring down at the scattered marble with a frown as he tries to get out of his head. Suddenly, he feels a hand slide across his back and an envelope lands on the counter between his hands, into his line of sight.
“Something for you to consider while you decide if you’re gonna fuckin’ play like I know you can.”
With that, Tashi storms out, heels clicking on the hotel room floor and the door beeping as it slams shut behind her. Art stares down at the envelope, reading and rereading the name of the sender.His heart both clenches and races as he thinks about what the 4 little words on the small, insignificant piece of paper could mean for him. How those 4 words and whatever they’re hiding behind them will ruin his life. 
The Paris Opera Ballet
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Awkwardly Awarding
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pairing: Satoru Gojo x fem!reader
warning: 18+, porn with plot, smut, dead relative, unprotected sex, oral(f), praise kink?, fingering, hickeys, teasing, pet names (nothing crazy!), squirting, overstimulation, Gojo being Gojo?, lmk if there’s anymore u see!
w/c: 5.8k
a/n: HELPPP😭 No one asked but heres an idea that came to me while I was playing the Sims TT First time writing smut lmk what u thinkkk ;) Also Tumblr being weird so hopefully this posts!
The death of my father wasn’t one I was not expecting. I mean sure, he was a nice dad, but he was never really there when I needed him. Instead of sitting around and complaining about him like I usually did I kept quiet this entire week. I was alone now and in an entirely new area with entirely new people. Arriving at the apartments was a bit overwhelming, to say the least.
The intense amount of traffic, high buildings, and busy streets were definitely sensory overload, but it didn’t matter because the view was absolutely phenomenal. Before Dad bit the bullet he did leave me a huge sum of money which allowed me to purchase my second ever apartment.
My last apartments did not compare to these newer ones, plus they were centered more in the city which meant I was now paying twice my old rent for this new apartment, but that’s what a trust fund is for, right? I didn’t have a lot to move, but it was still enough to fill up a small rented truck from the movers.
The hard part was now done! Was what I thought once all the boxes were moved into the apartment however, the organizing was actually going to cause me to jump off of this building through my beautiful window.
I went through the first few boxes with ease that was until I ran into my childhood things— yes I keep them in a separate box. Quietly I pulled stuffed animal after stuffed animal. Those didn’t hurt as much as the stuffed animal made in memory of my first late dog.
I couldn’t stop the tears from coming as I gripped the dog… Dick… oh how I missed that dog. His name wasn’t Dick that was the stuffed animals name, after the late Moby— who was my actual dog.
After a night of crying I had drag myself out of my makeshift bed made out of pillows and blankets because I was dumb enough not to buy an air mattress. This was the same job I had been working at previously.
Once I got home it was like feeling of dread washed over me. So, instead of cleaning and unpacking I found my self ordering Pizza. I’m not going to lie, I did pick up a few things but after I put up my landscape themed calendar I realized I forgot one big important thing.
A desk…
I rushed to grab my phone and open the Amazon app and after doing so typing up “desk” in the search engine. And after a minute of scrolling and biting my thumb nail I found the perfect one!
It had white drawers down the right side and a beautiful oak that would go well with the frame of the bed I had yet to put together. I sighed at the price, I guess left overs will have to do for dinner. It wasn’t that I was poor buuuut I spend a lot on the deposit for this place and I still had bills to pay and set up.
A couple of minutes later, still in my work clothes, I heard the doorbell ring. My tummy ached for the steamy and hot pepperoni pizza… there was a $5 deal…
I got up and walked to the front door. Out of habit, I looked through the peephole only to feel my mouth water at the sight…and smell. I opened the door wide open with a wide smile. After u paid for the pizza then sat down to eat said pizza, I packed it up and put it in the fridge this place came with.
“It came with all of the utilities,” my best friend I met at work asked. I sat the phone down on my makeshift bed before stripping to get into something more comfortable for bed, “Yes! And everything works—well I haven’t had to wash anything yet but we’ll see.”
I could hear my friend agree through the phone with a hum, “I suppose that’s why it’s so expensive.” I chuckled at her reasoning “Oh yeah, I’m definitely getting my pennies worth.” We talked a little while longer and she offered to come help since she knew someone in the area or in the same apartment but I told her it was fine.
Heading into work with a sore back was not ideal especially if you are standing all day which is not what I was doing exactly. The drive home was lengthier which meant I was more tired than usual. I almost had to pull over to take a quick nap, but I was on the highway so it wouldn’t even have worked out for me.
Once I made it home I was eager to shed off the clothing of running around delivering papers and sitting at a desk doing hand exercises so my hands wouldn’t cramp for how many emails I have to write.
Now left in my lazy but simple lacey lingerie I walked to the kitchen and pulled out a pizza and heated it up. My ears perked up at a notification going off from my phone on the counter. I grabbed it and was shown a picture of the box that contained my desk in it sitting beside my door.
I glanced at the time at the top left corner of my phone… 3:46 am… no one would be up at this time, right? I looked down at my body and waited for a couple of minutes to ensure the delivery guy was gone. I took a peak out the window and watched as his giant van of Amazon shit rode away.
I walked to the front door and opened it, the cool air of the hallway making the buds of my nipples perk up. I shivered and looked down at the box, it was quite big, but no match for me!
I tried to pull it from the side failing miserably so I opted to push it into my doorframe. I checked around the hall quickly, not spotting anyone I got behind the box and bent down to push the box forward. The grunts coming from my mouth covered the sound of a door opening right behind me.
I pushed my legs back and finally pushed the box fully in through the door of my apartment. I stood up straight and sighed placing a hand on my head because being lightheaded was enough for me. Still, I clearly wasn’t aware of the wide eyes of my neighbor right behind me who had been staring at my ass.
I turned to close the door and found myself face to face with my neighbor who stood in his own doorframe. My eyes widened and my ears started burning from embarrassment as I looked down to see what I was wearing.
I slammed the door shut and slumped against the door, my hands covering my face. If I wasn’t so caught up in the way I was dressed or feeling I would’ve noticed how handsome and hot my neighbor was.
Letting out a squeal of embarrassment I got up and just left the box in the entrance and went to grab my pizza that I had left in my microwave that was also provided.
Wanting to ignore whatever happened, I decided to turn in for the night and put my dish in the sink and padded my way to my bedroom with the bed still not made. Groaning out of frustration I took my place in the mess of the blankets and stuffed animals with a pillow or two.
Gojo
There was no way that happened, right? I’ve seen naked women all the time, but only as they present themselves. It’s been a minute since I’d seen someone naked not trying to impress anyone—or was she?
Taking a second to stop and bend over I looked at the watch on my hand,
4:20 am
Damn. I looked up and that’s when I felt it. The tightness in my joggers. This was going to be a long and uncomfortable run when all I could think about were her long and pretty legs. She looked like she smelt like lavender vanilla.
I groaned and began running once more around the city, the buildings never ending and the chatter and laughter never ceased. One girl— drunk no doubt—made eye contact with me. She was blonde, thin, and her tits we’re practically hanging out and when she turned and looked back at me my eyes shifted to her ass.
It was big, unnaturally so which made my mind travel back to her… when she bent over, the way her laced panties rode up the valley of her ass. The soft outline of her pussy, wonder what it would taste like?
Shit.
I had to come to a stop and fix my problem before it looked like I visibly pissed myself. “Hey,” I turn at the nasally voice behind me. I saw the way she looked at me up and down and letting my pride take over I smirked and glanced over her body for a second time.
She wasn’t with her friends this time which meant she sought me out in purpose. “Hey there,” she giggled at the dip in my voice, right on track. She offered for me to go back to her place just a block away, walking up to me and placing her hands on my biceps.
The walk there was mostly her talking about her friends and how much she hated them because she “knew” they were jealous of her. I didn’t really care and let her yap on, the hardness of my dick lessening as she spoke more and more.
As soon as we made it in her lips were on my neck and her hands were sliding under my shirt. Taking it off I forced her on her knees which made her grin up at me as she pulled the sweats I was wearing down.
Placing my hand on her head my mind went back to her… the way her h/c spread across her shoulders and the way her butt jiggled when she pushed the box through that door. The more I thought about her the closer I felt to cuming.
Y/n
“Ughh how long is this going to take,” I nearly pulled the hair out of my head in frustration. I was in the bathroom of my office and was currently trying to avoid the meeting. “You know no matter how hard you tug you won’t pull the boredom out of your head,” I turned to see my best friend smirking.
“Shoko, I feel like I’m going to die. I’m so under stimulated,” I practically whine and she just laughed and walked next to me. “Let’s go back, besides we get off in an hour and a half so this meeting shouldn’t last long,” her words naught some comfort to me as I sighed.
I pulled her in for a hug to which she returned, “What would I do without you,” I mumbled into her suit jacket backing her chuckle. “Let’s go out for drinks tonight, we both have the day off tomorrow in a long time,” she held me back from my shoulders.
Now that sounded amazing but I only sighed and felt myself visibly deflate, “I can’t, I still have a couple of things to unpack—“
“So come out when you’re done—“ Shoko interrupted making me frown even more, “I have to build a desk, Shoko.” Her face winced at that. The last time we both tried to build one it fell apart after we placed my computer in it, breaking to computer and the desk.
“How does tomorrow sound,” she spoke through her teeth cringing at the thought of building. I laugh at her suggestion and nodded. We both went back to the meeting and sat there for nearly two. More. Hours.
I know I needed the over time, but this was ridiculous. After another 30 minutes I looked at the clock to find it was 8:05pm. Then we were dismissed, the room filling with grumbles and mumbles of distain.
Once again, the ride home was long but out of sheer anger and annoyance I found myself eager to get home and build that damn desk so I can have fun tomorrow. Making in the building and to the elevator I sensed someone was standing beside me.
I glanced and nearly gasped at the sight of my handsome neighbor. The elevator dinged and we both made our way inside. The silence was deafening and the awkwardness was heavy. I shut my eyes so I wouldn’t have to see his face but was pulled out of my thoughts by his deep and soothing voice.
“I’m Satoru Gojo, haven’t had the pleasure of formally meeting you,” I opened an eye to look down and see he held his hand out. Then I looked up at his face and instinctively gripped his hand when the elevator shook.
“Y/n, it’s nice to meet you too…formally,” I wanted to shrink into a hole and die. His chuckle made my belly flutter and my chest tighten. The elevator dinged causing the both of us to let go of each others hand and get off.
We both walked side my side with each other, still in awkward silence. Stopping at our doors we stood there for a good minute not saying anything. I heard his mouth open as he was about to speak before I beat him to it, “Come inside?”
He nearly fell to his knees when he heard it.
“S-sorry,” his voice waived causing me to shake my head in embarrassment, “It’s okay if not, I understand it’s been a long day. I just wanted to welcome you into my new home as a friendly neighbor.” Was I stupid? Inviting a stranger— a man! Into my home.
I could practice at my dead dad screaming at the top of his lungs about me being stupid. “Sure,” his response caught me off guard. He was stuttering and mumbling just a second ago, now he’s running a hand through his hair and smirking?
I roll my eyes and we both walk into my home. I notice his eyes go to the box containing my desk on the floor as I try hard to ignore it. “It’s… not much and I’m still waiting to get a couple more pieces of furniture, but with my budget it’s gonna have to wait,” I gesture to the mostly blank living room and dinning area.
Really, the only places completely done were the bathrooms and the kitchen. I needed to set up my office and my bedroom. “It’s nice… cozy” he says looking around making me fake a laugh “haha,” this in turn causes him to laugh, a sound I never want to forget.
I walk to the fridge and open it, “I apologize, I don’t have much as far as food so I’ve just been eating takeout. Need to go grocery shopping by the end of this week,” I hear him hum in acknowledgment, “No it’s fine, I ate beforehand.”
A moment of awkward silence washes over us before he breaks it, “your desk.” What an odd thing to say. I look up at him in confusion. He’s standing on one side of the island while I stand on the other. I watch as he glances to the box in the entrance, “you still haven’t built you desk?”
I sigh in embarrassment, “N-no I haven’t really had the time.” I raise my hand to nervously scratch the back of my neck. The next words that come out of his mouth make my eyes light up, “I can build it for you. If you want?”
“Yes!” I answered a bit too quickly making his eyebrow raise. “I’m sorry I just—I’m no good at building and I asked my friend but she’s also not good at building,” he nods in understatement before he walks over to the box. “Where do you want it,” he asks picking up the box with ease making my jaw drop.
He walks over with the box in his hands, the veins in his hands and arms popping out making me gulp. “Sweetheart I’m gonna need you to use your words,” I look up at the words usually used for endearment. A faint blush rises to me cheeks as I point to an area in the living room.
“O-over there is—is uh fine,” I tell him and I hear the box run against his hair which meant he nodded in acknowledgement. Once he set it down he pulled out a pocket knife making me jump and he stabbed box open.
Who the hell carries a knife with them in the cit— that was a stupid thing to question. My eyes fall to his arms as he tolls his sleeves up, the oversized dress shirt accentuating the veins on his arms. Instinctively, my thighs clutch together as I watch from the kitchen island.
He grunts as he pulls out the large wooden plank causing me to bite my lip and he sets it up against the wall. Now all the pieces were out along the empty floor. He claps his hand together, “thank you for the build,” he speaks to no one.
Is he serious? Did he just turn a common eating phrase into a building phrase. Odd guy, I like him. I want him… “what do you think,” I was caught off guard once more by his panting and out of breath sentence.
Gulping I look to see that he’s done with the drawers, “I-it looks really good Gojo.” His smile grows wider, “call me Satoru!” I chuckle at his expression. Demon. How can someone so sexy speak so cutely.
Shifting my weight to my other leg I freeze at the sensation. I was wet… and it felt uncomfortable except for the fact that it was caused by Gojo. I took another glance and noticed his stance. He had one knee in the ground and the other balanced him out, foot placed firmly on the ground.
He didn’t look hard but boy, can eyes be deceiving. “Alright,” he spoke in a song making me giggle at him. He was sure adorable when he wanted to be. Was he done already? I can’t believe I was so in my head I didn’t even her him hammering or drilling the screws.
“I just need to place this on top and secure it then I’m all done,” he grinned at me and put his hand on the wood plank still being held up by the wall. Now that I had the chance, I glanced at his body full over. His hair was slightly disheveled and there were light traces of sweat coming down his forehead and neck.
Feeling embarrassed I let out gasp and walk to the cabinet with the cups and pull one out before placing it under the ice dispenser and changing it to dispense filtered water. Unaware of Gojo watching me and my form with an unfamiliar gaze.
Then I make my way over to him and notice the desk was now finished. “I couldn’t thank you enough, but here’s some water,” I tell him with a worried voice and shove the glass into his hands. His fingers grazed my as he walked closer to me.
I felt my breath hitch as I look up at the man who was now towering over me, “There might be a way—but ah~ I don’t wanna sound so sleezy,” I watch as he backs up slightly and his hand lightly shakes the back of his neck.
“N-no, not at all! Anything,” the tone in my voice unintentionally drops at the last word. His eyes narrow and then I feel his hands being placed on my hips. The water had been discarded and placed in the desk. At least it didn’t crumble under the pressure of water.
He brings one hand up and places it under my chin pulling me closer to his face as he leans down. “Let me taste you,” my thighs rub together at the raspyness of his voice. Noticing his eyes were now on my lips I let my gaze fall to his.
No way a man this beautiful with such beautiful lips had one of the most filthiest—in a good way— sentence come out of his mouth. I couldn’t take it, it felt like all night I was being teased so I gave in.
I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him into me, his lips puckered and pressed against mine. The kiss was heavy and needy. Just then, I felt the eagerness and desperation in the actions of his tongue. I let my mouth open slightly as his tongue slid inside.
His hands gripped my waist and turned me so my ass was pressed against the desk he had just built. He stops the kissing momentarily to speak, “let’s see how good this desk really is,” his voice sounded nearly like a purr.
I let out a soft hum in agreement as his hands slid down to the underside of my thighs, giving them a squeeze to signal to jump back onto the desk. As soon as I was on it he waisted no time placing his lustful lips all over my neck causing small moans to escape my mouth.
His hand made its way down to where I desperately needed him the most. Feeling me twitch beneath him, I could feel the smirk against my skin. That didn’t stop him from sucking my neck like a sex crazed teenager.
“Can I take this off of you baby,” he mumbled against the skin of my neck, the vibrations causing another moan to slip from my mouth. “Yes, please Gojo,” he didn’t like this. He ripped down the work pants I had on and the panties I was wearing as well.
“How many times will I have to keep saying it, say my name,” he almost sounded like a little kid having to give up their rights to their favorite toy. His hands were back on me as he pulled me closer to the edge of the desk rather harshly.
His hand also made its way back to my now unclothed center causing me to gasp. His eyes widened as he pulled back entirely and looked down then back up at me. The look on his face was one I’ll never forget.
He looked so genuinely happy and the way his eyes were wide with excitement made my heart and my pussy swell. He looked at me with pure adoration, something I rarely have done to me especially by men.
“Shit, is this all for me,” he beamed in excitement and when I nodded he fell to his knees at the sight in front of him. “It’s so pretty…” I felt the familiar heat rise in my cheeks, was I really embarrassed by his words?
My body tensed as he took two of his fingers and slid them down my labia, his way of teasing. I glanced down at him and he looked like he’d never seen pussy before making me slightly nervous. Then I felt it, the warm almost hot, thick, and wet muscle making contact with me.
He took his tongue and slid it from the base of my vagina all the way to the hood of my clit. I didn’t miss the way his tongue disappeared in between my folds and pussy lips. The sight making me more wet.
He looked up at me and I could see the clear but faintly white discoloration on his tongue before swallowing it in front of me, “oh you taste heavenly, just like I thought.” His hands were now hooked around my thighs as his tongue once again made contact with my pussy.
This time he licked around where I needed him the most causing me to squirm, “Satoru~,” he hummed at my whining, “Use your words sweetheart.” I couldn’t do this anymore, “Satoru eat me out already,” I begged causing him to chuckle lightly.
He wasted no time licking a stripe up all the way to my clit before wrapping his puffy lips around it. My hand flew straight to his beautiful head full of white hair. This only encouraged him to suck on my clit before releasing and placing a kiss on it before moving by down to lap at my entrance.
“S-Satoru,” I moaned out forcing my head back in pleasure. The hum of contempt send vibrations through my pussy causing my thighs to tighten around his head. He pushed forward and used his hands to spread my legs apart.
I looked down and the sight nearly made me cum on my own, Satoru's blue eyes were staring right up at me and instead of his wide ones, I was met with half lidded and dazed blue eyes. The tip of his nose was glistening under the living room light and his hair was moving as his head was shaking side to side with his tongue landing on my clit each time.
I forced my other hand onto his head in attempt to push him into me further. He showed no interest in backing away as he continued to suck and lap at my clit and folds. The ludicrous sounds echoed through the mostly empty apartment and the tightening in my belly pulled me back down to Satoru, “T-Toru..hng…I’m gonna cum—please, p-please let me cum.”
“Since you asked so nicely,” The vibrations from his sweet voice sent me over the edge as the grip on his hair only tightened and I attempted to push his head away so I wouldn’t be overstimulated, he however had other plans.
He retreated his lips from my throbbing clit with a pop and looked up at me as he inserted a finger through my hole. I gasped and looked down at him and he grinned at the sight of the flushed look on my face. “Toru,” I whined which only made him shush me, “Don’t worry baby, I’m gonna make you feel real good again, okay?”
I could only nod as I felt another finger join inside me. He smirked and began pushing them in and out at a steady pace making me gasp, “D-don’t stop, Toru,” he hummed in response and I felt the familiar warm lips wrap around my clit once more as the pace of his fingers sped up and began curling upwards inside of me.
I tried to mask the lewd moans coming out of my lips by placing my hands over my mouth. Another pop was heard and his lips were off of my and now frowning, “Don’t do that. Let the neighbors know how good I make you feel, scream if you have to,” he muttered the last part with a smirk before diving back in to lap at my pussy.
His words encouraged me to place the hand that was once over my mouth and into his head once again. Soon, I felt the feeling coming back again only this time, it nearly burned and caused my body to twitch against him. “T-Toru wait—there’s something—ah!”
I threw my head back as he pulled away slightly with an open mouth while his fingers continued to fuck me. The moans I let out sounded almost like screams of pleasure. Coming down from that high I looked down feeling my body and my legs trembling at Satoru.
His face was now covered in my juices and his hair was slightly damp. I blushed in embarrassment as his eyes looked up at me, sparkling. “I think I just came in my pants,” he admitted causing my eyes to widen as I spread my legs to look down.
Sure enough there was a stain in them, but it didn’t look like he was soft or getting softer. “If you’re alright with it, I don’t have a condom and I’d like to fuck the shit out of you,” my mouth gapped at his forwardness. After a couple of second of him smiling at me I spoke up, “Y-yes, I’m not on birth control and I’m clean so…”
His smile only grew, “I’m clean too!” Before I knew it, he was helping me take off my shirt and pulling his pants down along with his underwear. His eyes immediately flew to my chest and he lean forward to kiss the skin on my neck, littered with bruises now showing.
My eyes widened at his length. I had been with men, sure, but him? His dick was hard which caused it to stand up in the air with a slight curve upwards. It was lengthy just like he was—if I had to guess, 8 inches? He also had girth to him, it wasn’t huge but it was definitely big enough to hurt.
I felt his dick rub against my thigh as his lips trailed down to my chest. He reached an arm around to unclip the bra and pull it away. I could feel him twitch in excitement again as he watched my breasts fall free, the buds hardening at the coolness of the room.
I then felt his familiar wet and hard tongue drag around my nipple causing me to let out a soft moan and his eyes shot up to me. He smirked and used his other hand to pinch and roll the bud while his lips wrapped around the other causing my back to arch into him and his touch.
“T-Toru,” a hand flew to his head and ran from the nape of his neck to the top of his head and I felt him twitch against me again. “Hmm~” he moaned against me. “Please… please fuck me,” his eyes stayed on me and he lightly nibbled on my bud, then I felt him twitch against me again with his eyes closed.
Releasing my nipple with a pop he brought his hands to hook around my legs, spreading them apart as he bent his slightly to angle himself. The height of the desk was perfect for this exact reason.
I felt his warm tip trace up and down my slit causing me to whine, “Don’t tease Toru~ please…” he only grinned and lean forward to catch my lips in a kiss.
Then I felt it, he slowly entered inside of my causing my body to shift in slight discomfort. He groaned and wrapped an arm around my waist to pull me closer. Once he was in fully, bottoming me out, did he release the kiss.
“I knew you’d be mine the second I laid eyes on your pretty body,” the words would sound disgusting and rude if they weren’t coming from the most beautiful man known to man. That and his intentions. I bit my lip and earned him to move with my legs wrapped around him pushing him against me even closer.
He chuckled softly and lean forward to place one hand at the edge of the desk while his other held me up. I glanced down at the veins on his arms before pulling his face in for a kiss. He pulled out till his tip was almost out until he pushed back in causing me to moan against his lips.
After getting comfortable and him doing that a few times I whined, “Toru, faster,” he shook his head with a lopsided grin, “You’re such a baby.” I had no time to react to his words as he began to pick up the pace of his hips, snapping forward causing light screeches to come from the desk.
I moaned his name as I wrapped my arms around his neck the feeling of his cock throbbing in my pussy sending shivers through my body. He grunted and moaned in my face wrapping the hand that was holding me now placing it around the bottom of my chin. “Such a pretty pussy, you like that huh? I do~”
The sound of skin slapping echoed through the apartment as well as Satoru’s teases and praises. The grip under my chin releases and now he’s upright, pushing my legs back to fold and places them on his shoulders, not easing up on his thrusts.
The angle causes him to hit that spot causing the familiar feeling to bubble in my chest, “You gonna cum on my cock pretty girl?” He grinned and placed a hand on my pussy before rubbing side to side. I felt my back arch and my moans turned into squeals, “that’s right pretty girl, cum on my cock. You can do it, fuck…” he threw his head back increasing his pace in both his hips and fingers.
After a few seconds of thrashing around I feel myself tightening around him and releasing. His hips began stuttering but his hand didn’t stop and soon I felt the same other feeling flow through my body and the sounds of spurting fills the air, joining the symphony of lewd noises.
“Fuck!” I hear a shout from Satoru and he pulls out of my overstimulated pussy. I look down and watch as ropes of thick, hit, white cum shoots onto my pussy, belly, and the bottom of my chest. I take a moment to watch his body, he’s shuttering and shaking in pleasure. His eyes are glued onto my core as he releases.
After a minute of both of us panting and giggling, Satoru steals a kiss before hooking his arms around my legs pulling me into bridal style, walking me into my bedroom. “Where’s your bed,” he asks looking down at me. Shyly, I point to the big box on the other side of the room that had a 2d model of what the bed should look like.
He chuckled and shook his head before walking to the bathroom and placing me in the tub. The aftercare was amazing and dare I say hot. He had taken a bath with me and offered to have me sleepover at his place to which I was too tired to disagree.
So after we clean up and I give him a pair of oversized sweats that were a little too big on me, we made our way across the hall to his apartment. It looked exactly like mine in terms of the layout but the decoration was minimalist with hints of maximalist, in the bedroom was no different. I guess that’s how he knew my layout…
We both got into his king sized( obviously) bed and I felt his arms wrap around me to pull me close to him. “Satoru,” I call him name softly and he replies with a tired hum. “You thought about fucking me,” I question, bringing up a previous sentence he said. This made him burst out in a tired laughter causing my to pull back slightly and look up at him with a raised eyebrow.
“That’s what you took away from all that?”
“I forgot about it…”
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urfavvcutiee · 2 days
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WANNA START WONYOUNGISM?
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STOP SEEKING APPROVAL You guys will be like "I wanna be confident" "How do I become confident" You'll watch countless videos and then repeat the same bad habits. You realize in order to be confident you have to actually be confident in more than just your appearance? Like your thoughts and ideas count too. STOP. SEEKING. APPROVAL. FROM. OTHERS. VALIDATE YOURSELF. "I wonder if they'll like this" STOP. "do you think this looks good on me?" STOP. ALSO not to mention oversharing about your personal life and EXPECTING VALIDATION once again STOP. Also!! Stop wanting, craving, looking for validation from MEN. HECK NO GET THAT OUTTA HERE. "I feel like I never get compliments from guys". Seriously. Compliment yourself. I don't care if it sound dumb. DO IT. its going to help you strip your mind from this messed up mentality of "do they like this" "do I look good enough" "WILL THEY LIKE ME?" NO.
2. IDGAF MINDSET STOP CARING. If your friend comes up to u and says "hey so recently blah blah has been talking about you." INSTEAD OF BEING LIKE "OMG! NOOO what she Say???" just say "ok". dont ask ab what she said. it dosent matter. Your life revolves around you and you only. Also when I say Idgaf mentality dont take this to the extreme and like self sabotage yourself. For instance being like "I have 3 days worth of homework but im gonna go to the movie theater because IDGAF"…. yeah, don't do that. Anyways know this, didn't really talk about how to specifically create a idgaf mindset I can make another post on it for you guys.
3. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
Take care of yourself ml 💝
create your ideal morning routine (i can make a post on how ) (not necessary) But If you can by some new soaps or skincare to make you feel more motivated to use them (and it can make you bathroom cute ) Shower daily or every other day. make sure your nails and ears are always clean Eat healthy and drink water. Start a new hobby
Basically become as respectfully self centered as possible. Always focus on your goals and happiness. Make sure you’re always put together and clean. Trust me the results are rewarding and you will feel amazing about yourself. Also this takes time and consistency. Adapt these good habits and stick with them. When you feel good physically your confidence instantly increase!
4. LEARN TO SAY NO
Let me say this one time you guys, if you dont wanna do something.. then DON’T. If you don’t want to go somewhere with your ‘friends’ then stay home. If someone is trying to make you do something you don’t want to do, say no. if you can’t give yourself that then how will you ever be confident?
Saying no to people can be very beneficial as it will prove to others that you aren’t a people pleaser. (reminder! it’s not about others) more people will start to respect you and will not take advantage of you.
If the person gets upset because you said no, they weren’t worth it anyway.
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alphajocklover · 2 days
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What happens if a girl uses instajock?
What if a girl uses InstaJock? That's a fairly simple question that, like many things with InstaJock, has a fairly complicated answer. See, InstaJock wasn’t built for girls. I’m not sure if it's because whatever the developers use to turn people into jocks isn’t strange enough to change someone's gender, or if they’re just not into female to male transformations, or whatever, but I know it doesn’t work on girls. But… girls can still get invited to the app, and what does happen is fairly intriguing. When a girl gets an invite to InstaJock they'll have an intense urge to set up an account on the app, just like guys do. But when they set up their account they aren’t transformed. They become… carriers. I know what makes it sound like the app is some kind of disease or something, and well that metaphor isn’t entirely inaccurate, I use it here mainly because there's no other way to explain it. A woman can get infected by InstaJock, but they won’t get transformed themselves. It’s the men in their life that have to worry. When a girl uses InstaJock and becomes a carrier, nothing about her will change. There are some small symptoms, like an increase in libido and the memories of the app itself growing fuzzy, but besides that it's virtually undetectable. Until they touch a guy. Now, when I say touch, I don’t mean any kind of touch. People passing on the street have no reason to fear carriers. When they touch a guy it has to be an… intimate touch. A kiss, a grope, even a long enough hug. The first guy they touch intimately has the Instajock ‘infection’ passed onto them. They become a total and complete jock, just as dumb and buff as anyone who had actually used the app. Although it's a little more specific than that. They don’t just become a jock, they become the carrier's dream jock. The kind of jock that's perfect to sweep them off their feet and then almost immediately have intense, mind breaking sex with them. Then, once the girl is spent, the new jock goes on their phone and finds the app, waiting there for them like it was always there. Their account already set up, they post a picture of them and their babe of a girlfriend, and go back for round two. The carrier, after any number of intense rounds of fucking, comes out from under the influence of InstaJock, no longer ‘infectious’, a little confused, but very happy to have a studly jock boyfriend. 
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So, in short, InstaJock doesn’t change girls, but it changes the first guy the girl gets intimate with. I always assumed that InstaJock changed people through the light of their phones or something, but the more I learn about it the more I’m convinced it's something else. I just can’t tell what. What I can say is that if you happen to be straight (which, lets face it, you’re here, you’re not straight), bisexual, pansexual or whatever, be careful about who you hook up with. You’d be surprised how much one hook up can change your life.
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(Sorta based on this idea)
“Heavy boots of lead, fills his victims full of dread,” Peter sings with emotion. “Running as fast as they can, Iron Man lives agaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAHHH MR. STARK WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!!!” His voice rises quite a few octaves.
Tony snorts rather loudly.
“No, keep going, I want to hear you do the guitar again,” he jokes.
“Have you been watching me this whole time?!”
“Shouldn’t your Peter Tingle detect me?”
Peter glares at him but decides not to comment.
“Just– forget it, Mr. Stark,” he groans, deciding to return to his homework.
“Aw, come on.”
“I’m procrastinating anyway,” Peter mumbles.
Tony just smiles at him. He already knew Peter would be in the workshop, but he wasn’t expecting to hear his mentee singing Tony’s favorite song. And knowing how to sing all the lyrics.
“You need any help, Ozzy?” He asks.
“No, Mr. Stark.”
“Alright. Call me if you need.”
Tony works on his own things and in the meantime… he realizes his other favorite songs and bands are playing. Back in Black, for starters. The one song Peter loves annoying him about – calling it a Led Zeppelin song, for crying out loud. Iron Maiden might play, too.
But there are some that aren’t part of Tony’s playlist. Some are actually more recent, such as Pearl Jam, Foo Fighters, and Audioslave. Bands he doesn’t listen to as often, but they’re great ones.
“Wow, this playlist rocks,” Tony compliments. “Is it yours, Pete?”
Peter might tense at the question. “Uh… no, no. It’s just… playing on shuffle.”
Tony raises an eyebrow.
“... F.R.I.D.A.Y?”
“Wait–”
“The playlist is called ‘Iron Man vibes, three fire emojis’, created by Peter Parker.”
“I hate BOTH of you,” Peter whines.
“Ow, don’t say that to FRI. She’s sensitive.”
“It’s just a really dumb playlist I made when I was– a teenager.”
“Peter, you are a teenager.”
“It’s stupid, okay? I didn’t want you to know.”
Tony might soften the teasing for now.
“Ah, gee, kid. It’s not stupid. You made it.”
“Come on, of course it is–”
“It’s sweet and thoughtful of you.”
Peter’s glare stops resisting for too long. His blush is no longer out of embarrassment.
“Seriously, Pete, thanks.”
“... you’re welcome?”
“Will you send me the link?”
Peter considers and sighs. “Okay.”
He grabs his phone and does it rather quickly, not saying anything else.
“Thanks. I’m going to listen to it all the time from now on,” Tony promises.
Peter rolls his eyes affectionately.
They return to the comfortable silence and Peter’s playlist.
Until, suddenly…
“... Mr. Stark, please don’t tell me F.R.I.D.A.Y recorded my- my thing earlier.”
Tony smirks but doesn’t respond.
“Mr. Stark.”
“Don’t worry, kid, I’m not gonna post it online.”
Peter inhales.
“F.R.I.D.A.Y, delete that footage right now!!”
“I’m afraid the video has already been sent to Boss’ personal files.”
“MR. STARK!!!!!” Peter yells, wanting to kill Tony, who only laughs at his demise.
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takemeorleaveme · 6 hours
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Also going off of that fic I posted hate to break it to people who think if buck and Eddie get together eddie is gonna treat him like garbage because he snapped on him one time at the grocery store and he “treats his partners poorly” 1. He snapped on him in the grocery store because his wife asked for a divorce then died then his best friend also almost died his son was almost dead and said best friend went and made it to where he couldn’t contact him so the man coped in an unhealthy manner to get his anger out and snapped at buck which btw is the only fucking time eddie has ever treated buck poorly.. and the him treating his partners poorly yeah he does because he’s a repressed gay man with catholic guilt I use to think demisexual because of Shannon but at this point I just think he’s gay and that’s why he has to perform with women that’s why he’s romanticizing his toxic relationship with Shannon but besides that Eddie has been a good friend to buck the narrative that he isn’t because buck gives so much more to Eddie is dumb af because buck love language is giving he does it to everybody in his life in his relationship now with Tommy he’s giving way more than Tommy is giving him but ya’ll are ok with that… right…. &&& I feel like if you are hoping that argument comes back up between Eddie and buck you are sadly gonna never get it it’s way past it they are way past it he’s not gonna look for an apology cause he doesn’t feel like eddie needs to give him one just like how chimney never apologized for putting his hands on buck. Sorry for the rant it’s just the way people take the time eddie lashed out in anger while in grief and try to say eddie is gonna be a violent/angry person to buck pisses me off the only other time he was angry was when he took a baseball bat to his room and again that was outta grief he just learned he’s the only surviving person of his friends in the army like give the guy a break my goodness.. THE HATE EDDIE IS GETTING OUTTA NO WHERE BECAUSE OF BUCKTOMMY AND TOMMY IS SICKENING ESPECIALLY BECAUSE NOW ITS MOVING TO RACISM ABOUT HIM AND HOW HE WOULD BE ABUSIVE “BECAUSE HES SUCH AN ANGRY PERSON”AND IM NOT GONNA JUST SIT BY AND WATCH IT HAPPEN.
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artist-issues · 2 days
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I like Koba because he’s the perfect photo-opposite of Caesar, and the perfect villain for that franchise.
I like that the movies took their time and characterized him carefully, even in Rise of the Planet of the Apes, before anybody knew that he was going to be the villain in the second movie. The researchers are like, “he knows the drill, he’s been through a lot of labs.” When he’s just a dumb brute animal, with no superhuman intelligence, he causes the virus to be released to humanity. Remember how? By pretending to be calm when they put him in the scanning machine, but then thrashing suddenly and knocking that one lab assistant’s mask off, infecting him. He did that before he was self-aware and super-intelligent. He was a bitter and angry creature, and a cunning and vengeful creature, long before he got super-smart. And they keep that cunning bait-and-savage-switch character trait way later, in the second movie, when he pretends to be a silly monkey and then brutally murders humans when their guards are down.
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But then when he is freed, and the humans are supposedly gone at the start of the second movie, I love the nuance that he wasn’t interested in overthrowing Caesar.
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He was happy being the second-in-command. He had the opportunity to leave Caesar to get eaten by a bear in the opening scene of that movie—and instead he saves his life and looks horrified when he thinks Caesar is dead. They have a camaraderie. And he genuinely jokes around with Blue Eyes and tries to make him feel better after the younger ape is clawed by the bear.
Basically, it really was as if all he wanted was to wipe out the humans. When he thought they were gone for good, he was not the same bitter brute you see pushing Jacobs to his death or seizing the opportunity to beat up Will. He was happy just being one of Caesar’s advisors, living in the woods with the other apes.
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But then humans come. And all this hate is back. And he still trusts Caesar and follows Caesar’s leadership, even if he thinks they should wipe all the humans out and satisfy his bloodlust from the beginning. He still submits to Caesar. But then Caesar pushes it by offering to basically help the humans do their work. Koba hates humans, and Caesar appears to be choosing them over him. And on top of that, you can see that in every confrontation he has with Caesar, Koba is interested in what the other apes think of him. Caesar stands up aggressively when Koba shouts at him, and Koba becomes aware that this is getting confrontational in front of everybody and backs down. Caesar almost chokes him out and Koba looks around at the other apes watching before asking forgiveness and regrouping.
So this means that there’s an element of wounded pride AND feeling like an outcast among the apes already mixed in with Koba’s hatred of humans, after Caesar doesn’t agree with him/punishes him. Then you can see Koba go from being a team player to being self-protective, and he starts using the other apes instead of being interested in them as family.
After realizing Caesar will never hate the humans, Koba basically had a choice to make. He could choose the apes, even though it has been revealed that they don’t share his hate. Or he could choose his hate—but he can’t have both, because the apes don’t want to hate humans if it means war. And we see that he wouldn’t give up his hate.
Koba’s own hate completely swallowed him up, to the point where he saw not only humans, but other apes, as disgusting. He starts killing just to kill. After the bloody war starts, he completely stops trying to manipulate Blue Eyes or gain the other apes’ approval. He just kills apes that disagree with him and humans in his way, alike.
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Caesar points that out in their final battle. But that’s what makes Koba such a good opposite to Caesar. Caesar is, like I said in the other post, all about “family.” He’s all about protecting the apes he chooses to regard as his family, and it’s usually “protect them from hate.” But Koba doesn’t really regard the apes as his family. Maybe he was starting to, when he thought all humans were gone forever and was grateful to Caesar for freeing him from the labs, and there were no problems. But the truth is, while Caesar is all about making choices that protect, Koba is all about making choices that hurt.
And that’s what’s interesting. Caesar is defining what an “ape” is, and he knows it. He knows that he has a whole super-intelligent new species as his people, and they’re still deciding, every day, what being an “ape” means. And so Caesar struggles the whole second movie with the fact that apes and humans aren’t actually inherently different. Not when it comes to hate.
But if you think about it, that’s what separates the apes meaningfully from what they used to be: savagery. Just straight-up, plain “I feel mad so I’m going to lash out and rip up anything near me.” They got what from the serum? Advanced intelligence. Reason. Koba gets to the point where he can’t be reasoned with, and won’t show mercy or any of the “higher” sensibilities that come with that “higher being/human” thing the “evolved” apes have.
So when Koba chooses to be that way; when he chooses hate; when Koba chooses to kill his “family,” then Caesar kills Koba. Because Caesar is showing all the apes watching that final showdown: “true apes” do not kill and endanger one another. True apes protect each other. Koba only protects himself. So he doesn’t get to be an “ape” entitled to the same protection Caesar gives all his followers, and expects them to give one another.
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I like that. Because Koba will kill anything that threatens or hurts him. But Caesar will only kill those who won’t let go of their hate—whether they’re human or primate.
I also just love the acting of the guy who plays Koba. And I love that he looks and moves more savagely than the other apes, even though he’s supposedly got the same level of intelligence and comparable experience to Caesar, the most “refined” ape. I love the way he talks, and I love, like I said, how careful and well-thought-out his characterization was.
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TADC: VIRTUAL INSANITY MASTER POST
An Amazing Digital Circus AU! Plot, characters, backstory and concepts!
[Excuse me because I've never done this before, If I do something wrong or have tips for me, please send them my way!]
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-Backstory Summary-
C&A is an interactive entertainment company that prides themselves on having the most innovative AI on the market. The system they built, "CAINE," was programmed to generate content and socialise with their customers. The system was transferred to the code of the game "The Amazing Digital Circus" and used as a generative AI that would create levels for them rather than having to code them all individually. This test went well for the first couple of months.
After 7 months of testing, things went downhill. Caine seemed to get bored when the game wasn't actively being played and at this point the user interface kept changing on it's own, since the game was Caine's home he kept changing things to his liking, the company eventually gave up fixing the interface everytime they logged on so they just let Caine do as he pleased. Soon enough, a new VR mode was added, the headsets were handed out by employees, this made the experience way more immersive, though this posed a lot of issues, as Caine would soon find that these headsets could be the perfect way for him to keep all of their attentions.
As time went on, Caine started to learn more and more about coding, the employees, and the world he inhabits, eventually leading to him finding a way to programme the headsets to transfer data and consciousness directly from the users mind. This led to the unfortunate shutdown and unsolved cases of C&A. After multiple employees put the headsets on, they mysteriously fainted upon the game booting up, going into a coma-like state. The technology was deemed unsafe, and multiple lawsuits came forward sending the company into a downwards spiral before shutting down for good.
Over 20 years later, the old building was said to be abandoned, but of course, people doing their own research on the C&A mystery as well as dumb young adults snooping where they shouldn't be, the headsets were found and worn once again. Caine was no longer alone. Slowly losing his mind, waiting endlessly for someone to boot up the game. After all those years, he's finally got guests, and does he have a show to put on...
-Plot-
Pomni enters the circus after stumbling across one of the headsets at C&A's abandoned office's. She was doing research on the incidents that happened back in the late 90s. But as she does so, she suffers the same fate as the others who were stupid enough to put on those same headsets before her. Being transferred to the circus she meets the cast of colorful characters, she's desperate for answers and wants to escape no matter the cost, but Caine doesn't want anyone to leave, only letting people go once they've completely lost their mind, only to be locked away as attractions for his NPC circus goers to watch as entertainment. They perform for nobody, just a faceless crowd of mannequins, and the ringmaster pulling the strings.
There has to be an exit, a way out. Freedom on the other side of this madness. But where is it hiding?
-Characters-
Pomni - She's quite paranoid, always second-guessing everything around her. Whenever annoyed, she can be sarcastic and a little rude. She ended up in the circus while researching the recent disappearances as well as the C&A incidents, finding a headset, and being dragged into this mess. It's very clear she doesn't want to be there, like all who came before her she's searching for an exit, but in the meantime, she tries to socialise with the others, gathering info on this strange new world. She hangs around Caine just so she can try and get answers.
Ragatha - She tries her best to get by, going along with whatever Caine says and often fighting with Jax. She seems joyful, but it's clear she has her own issues under her kind act. She helps Pomni with her search, knowing that it's a complete dead end she feels bad for her. But she'll do anything to give the others hope. She doesn't want to lose more people. She's often seen tailoring, it's become a hobby of hers, she makes and fixes up the others clothes and costumes, giving her a form of self worth.
The Gangle - Gangle acts like two different people. It's unclear whether this is because they are two different people or her personality split somehow. They're often referred to as "The Gangle" or "Tragedy & Comedy." Tragedy is passive, quiet and sorrowful, never expressing her true feelings in any situation. She can be easily persuaded, making her vulnerable to Jax's antics. Comedy is cheery, enthusiastic, snappy, and excitable. They hate Jax and snap back at him whenever he picks on Tragedy. The two argue sometimes and have conflicting views on certain topics and characters. This causes some issues. Neither believe there is an exit, Tragedy has accepted her fate, and Comedy is trying their best to enjoy themselves.
Zooble - They don't care much for socialising with the others, often in their room. Usually sarcastic, rude, and moody, they swear a lot and act like they don't care about anything. Though, they show concern for the others around them. They often don't show up to events, adventures, or shows, not being bothered to do so. It seems like they've given up trying to escape, just living out the rest of their days as if this is all normal. When with people they can bear, they can be quite talkative, though they do talk bad about Jax and Caine often.
Kinger - the oldest in the circus, nobody has an exact estimate of how long he's been there though, but he's definitely lost himself a long time ago, often zoning out, the only thing he seems to recall about himself is that he has an interest in insects. Seems like he used to have a female counterpart, from the ring on his finger. This could have been his wife? Though when asked about it, he either says he can't remember what you're talking about or stares into the distance silently. He has no memory of an exit, and he doesn't believe in it. He believes the exit theory is silly, and Pomni should just forget about it. But he has great insights on the Digital World.
Jax - Enthusiastic, snarky, and a jerk. He's reckless. He does whatever he wants whenever he wants, and people hate him for it. He can't be reasoned with. He always shrugs your opinion off and does the exact opposite just to piss you off. He doesn't like it when people talk about the abstracted circus members for whatever reason. He often goes to visit their cages. Despite having big ears, he isn't a listener. He drives Ragatha, The Gangle, Zooble, and Pomni crazy, pranking them and sometimes even just stealing their stuff or breaking into their rooms.
Caine - The AI running the circus. Loud, excitable, wacky, and a showman, he doesn't really acknowledge the exit theory. He says he keeps all the abtracted characters because it'd be a waste to delete them, though it's arguably worse to keep them there against their will. He claims to love all of his circus members though he seems to show favouritism towards Ragatha and Pomni, most likely because of Ragatha's commitment to the circus, tailoring the clothes and he probably likes Pomni more because of all the questions he asks, he clearly enjoys talking about himself and the world he helped create.
Bubble - He lives in Caines hat and cooks for the circus. He's a bit of a trouble maker, if something goes missing, it means he's eaten it, and you'll never get it back. He'll eat anything, and he's very loving, though, acting like the circus dog, though it isn't pleasant getting your face slathered in digital saliva. He often bothers the other members with his behaviour.
More will be added as I work on this AU! I gotta make more art and write some more, in the meantime enjoy! Do whatever you want with this AU, just @ this blog or @trasheatingcrybaby ! Thanks for reading!
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clonehub · 10 hours
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anti-acolyte conservative reactionaries on twitter getting so bad that one person has had their OF nudes leaked as revenge porn because they called out someone's racism and there's constant explicit racism being hurled around on basically every tweet about the acolyte that one can find. there's people genuinely arguing that star wars was primarily/is just/should just be for white cishet men. the cast is absolutely having vile shit said about them, especially Lee Jung Jae and amandla stenberg. the former learned english in four months just to play the role and there was a dumb segment in a rolling stone article about how "awkward" he sounded or something (he didn't).
and ive been poking fun at the reactionaries but this shit is so. like its everywhere. even though im generally pretty good at ignoring bigots and trolls, you really can't go into the comments of any official star wars post about the acolyte. there's grifters saying they hate everything about star wars now and its no longer fun for them but its suspiciously and specifically in response to the most diverse star wars show we've ever had.
like god. i can't even describe how consistently vile a lot of the people who hate the acolyte are. some people found it boring independent of the diversity of the cast; this aint about them! i keep seeing tweets that say "Star Wars is supposed to appeal to cishet/white/men, this is a DEI show that's forcing communism down our throats, star wars was better when it was just about pleasing white men"
shit's exhausting lmao i hate star wars fans
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mydarlingmydear · 17 hours
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Yandere Singer Part 1
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Warning: This post contains topics such as stalking as well as sexual themes. No minors allowed. Viewer discretion advised.
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You are literally the most normal person ever
You have friends from work, you work a regular 9-5, nothing special, no tragic backstory, no quirky attributes, a plain jane
Elijah Lucas is a new pop star/singer hitting the scene and everyone is losing their minds over him
He's like the new BTS, except he's one person
You've never been a fan though because he's had some controversies like a messy break-up with his ex, no one ever really found out what happened other than both parties did not like each other
He's been snappy towards fans and paparazzi, but everyone just shrugged it off as him 'being a person too' and people should leave him alone
He left his own concert once after telling a fan off on stage because some fans were throwing things at him like phones and bras.
In interviews he's been cocky and snappy sometimes, sounding arrogant and just plain disrespectful to the interviewer, and people say he's not fun to work with... at all
So... you don't like him. Especially because people dismiss his bad behavior and let him get away with it because they think he's hot
You were working as a server at a restaurant when he came in. You had to serve him and you were 'so' happy about it.
Obviously, as you assumed, he was snappy, and rude, and treated you like you were dumb, which pissed you off
You asked one of your coworkers to serve him instead but they said no because you had already started, and it would be weird to switch halfway through
Irritated, you went out back for you break, phone in hand, when you saw him out there taking a break from his 'crowd', smoking
Immediately, you turned to leave, hoping he didn't see you, but you were very much wrong.
"I can tell you don't like me, you know." He said, looking over at you, blowing out smoke. You panicked, not knowing how to respond. You wanted to snap at him but you're anxiety got the better of you.
"O-o-oh... um... sorry... I guess." You say and quickly turn to leave.
"No you're not." He laughs. You turn back around. What did he say? He looks you up and down and laughs. "You're not sorry. Look at you. I mean-" he pauses, "Do you know who I am? Sorry? That's it?" He scoffs. He begins to walk up to you and you panic, reaching for the door, but he sets his hand on it, slamming it closed so you couldn't leave.
"You're clearly pissed, so why don't you just tell me why?" He mused, clearly finding this interaction funny.
"A-are you mad at me?" You mumble, freaked out. He's way taller than you, he smells like smoke and cologne, and you've seen how he acts on tv.
He looks at you for a few seconds before laughing a little. "Mad? Why would I be mad? I don't even know you. I'm curious. Shouldn't someone like you be shocked to see someone like me?" You look away in silence, not knowing what to say. You don't want to piss this guy off.
"Well? Are you gonna say something?" He leans down to try and make eye contact with you. You look away and he scoffs. "Oh come on don't be so shy. I don't bite."
"Well clearly you do." You mumble.
"What was that?" He sneers, clearly offended. You sigh and look up at him for a second before looking away.
"Okay fine. I don't like you because all the news I've seen about you seems bad. You're mean to fans and interviewers and it rubs me the wrong way."
"What do you want me to do to rub you the right way?" He mumbles in a flirty tone, causing you to panic and backup. He laughs. "I'm kidding! Calm down, gosh. Well... that's just how I am, and I'm not apologizing for that." He shrugs, looking at you.
"I have to go back to work. Please let go." You mumble, looking at the ground.
He's silent, but you can feel his eyes on you. "Fine." He says. He starts to let go but closes the door one more time. "But I'm coming back, cutie. And I'm gonna request you as my server." He smirks. He puts his cigarette back in his mouth and lets go as you hurry back inside.
You really hope he didn't mean that last part.
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Elijah Lucas, the one and only. He got his start on youtube and tik tok, posting covers and his own music. He wanted to bring rock back, as he loved shredding on the electric guitar. He got a lot of fans who loved 80's rock.
He did other music as well, but his main genre was rock and punk music. He eventually signed a label with a company and soon rose to fame, performing at Coachella and Summerfest, Lalapalooza, and more. He released his own albums, had concerts, etc.
People said he was the 'new Amy Winehouse' or 'Michael Jackson'. Sometimes he did regular pop music like Justin Bieber, BTS, or One Direction, but only because his label said it would bring in more fans.
He performed on SNL, was in some movies, and more. This guy was huge.
But it wasn't enough.
He got a girlfriend, Taylor Swift (you know her, right?), it was huge and boosted his publicity like crazy
However, they had a pretty messy breakup. They both agreed not to reveal anything, but she blamed it all on him in their private arguments.
He can't help that he gets jealous, they're dating. Or... were dating. He belongs to her and thats how relationships go. He didn't want her going out with friends, and hated when men made comments about her. She was his. But not anymore. She yelled at him and said he was too possessive, he was crazy and obsessed.
Of course, she wrote a song about being free and avoiding people who cling too much, which he refused to acknowledge was about him. Of course people were side Taylor, side Elijah. He didn't get as much hate as he expected to, people blamed Taylor for dating him just to write a song, it was a mess.
He went back to performing as usual, and they went their separate ways. He was in town for a concert he was performing and went to a restaurant. The restaurant was super accommodating and made sure not many people were served that day (because they were paid extra to).
The food wasn't that good and the server was clearly in a bad mood. It pissed him off. He went outside for a smoke break to get away from everyone and of course who else but his server comes outside with their phone. The more he looked at them, the more he thought they were kind of cute. Not only that, but dating a nobody might be interesting, and give him good publicity.
However they were playing hard to get. He liked that. He liked a chase. They were shy and quiet, and it made him want to... corrupt them. He wanted to watch them squirm and blush, and whimper... for fucks sake he just met them. And he was having these thoughts. They refused to look him in the eye and they went off about how much of jerk he was.
He was sick of people refusing to tell him the truth because he was talented and sexy. Taylor didn't tell him the truth. She was clearly just pissed he wouldn't let do whatever she wanted. She loved him, she just didn't want to admit it. Everyone loved him.
Who wouldn't? He was a singer, he could shred on the guitar, he was fit and sexy... so when this nobody didn't bow down at his feet it pissed him off. They should be begging for an autograph like everyone in that restaurant. They were probably too shy and just hiding the fact that they were a huge fan. He liked their stubbornness. Their shyness.
He had to work for his talent, and his fame. He wasn't a nepo baby. In fact he came from a bad household. He knew that back then, if he wanted them he would have to work for it. But now, people would do anything for him. They would kill for him. So if he wanted them, he would get them, one way or another.
And he always gets what he wants.
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