#this does not get explored enough. like the only character i think doesn't have family related trauma is alphys | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

graceandtheidiotsquad · 3 months

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Dumb Character Headcanons: Champion Cynthia

I am having brainrot over the queen of sinnoh ok. I love her and her crazy family so much-! I apologize for how random some of these are-some of them I got inspiration from popular ones from, some from AUs i've seen and some I just made up on the fly-Ok, enough rambling-on with the show!

- TOTAL. MOMMA. BEAR. She just-has very motherly, protective vibes and despite being one of the most generally considered TERRIFYING CHARACTERS IN THE SERIES (and I'm mildly scared of her too!) she'd probably take you out for ice cream after battling her to celebrate a job well done, win or lose.

- Speaking of ice cream, I think this is not only a popular hc i agree with but they made it CANON In the anime that she cannot, for the life of her, decide what flavor she wants and will just stand there for 15 minutes weighing all the pros and cons and unintentionally holding up the line. I mean she'll move when she realizes and apologize PROFUSELY but still- ...But would YOU tell her to hurry up and choose?? No, I don't think so.

- Her hair is usually either down most of the time or tied up in a bun. But only for when she needs it-she doesn't care how messy it gets, she just likes being wild I suppose. Sometimes you'll find her literally wrestling one of her pokemon for fun (usually Garchomp) and her hair will be full of leaves and sticks, and not a care in the world! One of her family taught her how to tie her hair back in a bun, and though she adores them-she was quite the pain to get to stand still long enough to even TRY as a child.

- You wouldn't think it, with how classy she is-...buuuuuut she was almost a leash kid. You think she gets this intimidation factor just from being so classy and dramatic alone? No, she can be fucking FERAL when she wants to be. Sometimes the Sinnoh League will have trouble finding her to get her to report to her champion duties as she's gotten distracted and wandered off to explore some ruins somewhere in the region and never told anyone where she was going.

- She used to and still can climb trees in seconds if left unattended. This has lead to many a heart-attack for her grandmother, watching her little baby Cynthia nearly DIE falling out of said tree, only to be completely unharmed and even LAUGHING at the experience.

- Actually is a REALLY big fan of the wrestling/battle royale circuit. She can and will burst out singing some of the intros at the top of her lungs, much to the shock of ANYONE in the room with her.

- She also happy dances and likes to put on music when she works. She loves piano but even she can't resist a good earworm, humming along to it as she runs around the local library or (reluctantly) winds up cooped up inside doing or cleaning up paperwork. This is implied to be canon in a spinoff game (Pokemon Masters EX if you're curious) and I totally agree that she just-cannot be bothered to clean up her office and it's almost CONSTANTLY a mess because she keeps getting distracted by new things to look at or something she hadn't seen in ages (BECAUSE of the mess) like a book and just winds up reading it all day. It's a vicious cycle!

- The reason she loves piano so much is she actually knows how to play, and is VERY Good at it! A very dear member of her family taught her when she was very young and she plays to help remember him-wherever the hell he's wandered off to now. Music connects us just as much as pokemon do, in her mind-so whenever she plays, he's right beside her again-whether physically or not.

- She has inherited the family 'way too fucking tall' gene and that does NOT help her intimidating appearance sometimes.

- Sometimes casually speaks fluent Latin/Greek just to confuse the shit outta people. Look, she isn't usually spiteful-but even the most graceful and kind people have their limits. The same person who taught her piano taught her it-probably for that express purpose. Also several swear words. (thankfully if she ever swears, it's in said language so hardly anyone will know-)

- She grew up feeling-quite isolated from others her age because of her intense focus on studying history and battling competitively. Mostly the history thing-the battling thing probably didn't help as most kids were likely TERRIFIED of how intense she got. But-...i think that's why she loved that member of her family so much. Finally, someone who understood her...! He'd even given her the egg that would hatch into her Garchomp. (It was SUPPOSED to be a togepi, that wouldn't cause much hassle aside from the occasional accident with metronome-...but NOOOOOO, he decided to let her cause havoc. Her grandma nearly smacked him.)

- Honestly if you told her you were a demon or some supernatural shit she'd probably be more fascinated and barrage you with questions than scared. Or kick ass if you were hostile-DO. NOT. FUCK. WITH THE CHAMPION OF SINNOH.

- She may or may not be guilty of spoiling hers and other people's Pokémon with treats. She can't help it! She has a WEAKNESS for puppy dog eyes, whether it be her own Pokémon, any she's babysitting (she feels like someone who would do that if asked) Or young trainers she's taken a shine to.

- Wound up with a heavy ass, GIGANTIC hand-me-down backpack from who-knows how many generations ago and yes, she CAN lug it around with ease. She doesn't much for her league job, but it's her go-to when it comes to adventuring or exploring. - Speaking of the backpack-she often carries her spiritomb outside of its pokeball inside while in particularly rough areas, usually hiding inside its keystone. You never know if you'll need a pokemon for backup and don't have time to reach for one of your pokeball before things get dicey, after all-and the sight of a very angry ghost and dark type pokemon erupting from an ancient backpack is more than enough to send anyone who would likely cause trouble PACKING-looking almost as if something is being summoned right behind her! (She doesn't know why she looks so terrifying that way, but at least it means no one will cause too much trouble)

- An absolute GIRLBOSS for sure-but also very, very soft when it comes to people she loves. She'll gush and gush about her family members-especially younger ones, or trainers she's mentally adopted (and she does this a lot.) as her own 'pack', so to speak. She'll try to tone it down if it makes them uncomfortable but it's so HARD-she feels so blessed to have people who love her for who she is, as strange and beautiful and intimidating and just a little bit odd as she can be that she just HAS to spread word about how amazing they are! (She's like one of those moms who shows off photos of her kids all the time, just not in an annoying way if that makes sense?? At least she tries not to be-but once she starts rambling about them or ANYTHING it is almost impossible to get her to stop!)

- Often makes hand gestures like pointing when she speaks, especially when she gets excited. She often doesn't realize she's doing it half the time-but she always does it when taking pictures. She just-feels like her hands HAVE to be doing something!

- I will not give away the massive spoiler this ties into but she OWNS the song Blood Right by Madame Macabre. JUST-IF YOU DONT WANT SPOILERS FOR LEGENDS ARCEUS, JUST-BE PREPARED YOU'RE IN FOR A RIDE!

#pokemon #pokemon cynthia #dppt #diamond pearl platinum #pokemon dppt #pokemon legends arceus #legends arceus spoilers #kinda???#i mean it's in the thumbnail of the playlist so I hope that's ok #champion cynthia #sinnoh #pokemon diamond and pearl #pokemon platinum #pokemon brilliant diamond #pokemon shining pearl #pokemon gen 4 #Spotify

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ruiniel · 4 months

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Sorry to hear you are not feeling well! Hopefully with plenty of rest you will get well soon 🩶

Here’s an HC ask if you feel up to it:

Adrian x Bold/Flirty Reader

- The twins never happened and reader just stumbled upon Alucard in the forest some day, stunned by his beauty and grace.

- Reader has an occupation that requires them to go into the forest from time to time, as kind as Adrian, he started to help them out.

- Reader developed a crush on him as they gradually got to know each other. Bold as they are, they decided to take the first move by… you guessed it, flirting. The kind that ends with his face tinged with the loveliest pink.

- Adrian is still mourning over loss over family and friends, and only sees reader as a friend (a close friend? And a pretty friend. He doesn’t even know anymore.)

- Reader’s tactics slowly working. He starts to crave your company like he does with Sypha and Trevor.

- He stares at your lips, sometimes your behind. Averts his eyes as dhampirely as possible when he catches your returning gaze and thinks you haven’t notice. You do.

- “Accidental” touches on his thigh when passing something over; warm, ticklish breath near his sensitive ear while you stand behind him when he sits and reads. He swears you are driving him crazy.

- He may just snap one day. And you hope it comes soon.

Thank you, I'm getting there slowly but surely. Going off about fictional people helps the morale, y'know?

Oh a pining HC, and bold characters are so fun!

◈ It might be that your attitude in time could draw the other side of him to the surface... one he hasn't had the opportunity to explore much beyond nighttime ventures through the wilds, chasing the malevolent things lurking there: the thrill of the hunt. The side that goes "Let's find out..."

Remember that?

◈ His instincts are just as sharp in his humanoid form as in his wolf form, and he feels it: the scent of your attraction growing stronger, the way you can't control the impulse to try and get closer.

◈ He's wary, at first. But there is honesty about you, too, and that has a scent of its own, comforting and achingly sweet. He knows he's taking a gamble by trusting you but let's face it, if his friends have been gone for a while now in this context, he's certainly more in need of someone to share his time with than even he can admit to himself.

◈ Besides, since your encounters in the woods become more frequent, you seem unperturbed by his nature, even after he's told you more of himself and some (not all) of what he's done.

◈ He still feels immensely guilty about how it all came to pass, and misses his family. It's a very confusing time in his life and he doesn't want to burden you with that.

◈ He's also afraid you'd want nothing to do with him any longer if he did tell you everything, all the moments he can't forget, the scenes that play in his mind's eye over and over.

◈ You don't seem to be deterred by anything though, and with admiration he takes his metaphorical heart between his teeth one day and sits you down one afternoon, under an ancient oak tree where you sometimes share your lunch.

It all goes pleasantly enough. At one point you try to reach for a bottle, propping your hand on his leather-clad knee for support as you lift yourself to grab a hold of the glass container.

When you try to remove your hand, he stops you, his own hand over yours. "Why do you do these things?"

Nothing gets past Alucard when it comes to danger and battle but navigating interpersonal relationships? Not his forte. He knows it, you know it.

And so, you swallow before you answer. "I Iike it. Touching you."

"Why?" His eyes are earnest, and you appear out of your element for a moment before his bluntness. But he really, really looks like he wants, no, expects an answer.

"Does it bother you?"

He ignores your question completely. "I wonder if your hand will still be here, after I share with you what I have to say." All easy manner is gone from his attitude.

You watch him, bemused, but your hand stays right where it is, on his warm, tense thigh. He's just told you in no uncertain terms: I know what you're doing. I know you want me. You're still processing that, but the words that leave your mouth are: "Let's... find out?"

He takes a sharp intake of breath at that, watching you strangely. "I never told you how I ended up alone, did I?"

You shake your head, and wait. And listen.

By the time he's done, you're staring at the patterns of the blanket, and he's regretting having broken the image you'd probably concocted of him in your head.

"People make mistakes."

Alucard raises his head. The warm hand on his thigh is still there. "What?"

"I said, people make mistakes. And people sometimes must make difficult choices for reasons beyond them."

When you smile at him, when you tuck a strand of errant hair behind his ear and suddenly hug him, Alucard stays perfectly still: with shock, with... relief? But his response is so fierce you sigh in surprise, arms winding around you and holding you there. "You're not running away screaming," he whispers in your ear, feeling the little shudder running through you. He likes holding you, he likes being held. He craves it.

"No, but you would, if you knew the shape of my thoughts when it... comes to you."

He'd love to pull your head back, to stare into your eyes as you say it. And so: he does. "My dear, dear friend... I want to know everything."

That was a mix of HCs and a scene haha I take no responsibility *blames it on the meds*

#alucard x reader #alucard castlevania x reader #castlevania imagine #adrian tepes x you #castlevania x reader #adrian tepes x reader #ruiniel:fanfiction #alucard x you #x reader #canon x reader

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chaoticace2005 · 3 months

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I think about Angel a lot. And rn I'm thinking about Angel going through a period of hypermasculinity after he rids himself of his contract with Valentino. I can't imagine that as a man from the environment he was in when he was alive, that his style is something he brought WITH HIM to Hell. Sure, his favorite color being pink isn't a new development, but I think the skimpy outfits and short skirts and cleavage showing shirts and dresses that cling a bit too tight are probably a combined product of defiance of the values his father held so dear, genuine interest in trying more feminine fashion, and Valentino forcing a certain type of image on him (whether directly or as a result of certain expectations/coming mechanism for the situations he put Angel in).

So I can imagine Angel going through this self imposed hyperfeminity to distance himself from the bad thoughts and feelings and situations, followed by hypermasculinity because after being forced to be, the idea of femininity becomes nauseating and just laced with the bad memories and sensations, followed by healing and rediscovery of what made the femininity feel good in the first place. Recontextualizing it. Finding ways he can enjoy it so that it's different from before. And maybe he never gets comfortable enough to wear certain things again, and that would be ok, too.

I have this sequence of events in my head of Angel coming down to the communal area of the hotel the day after getting rid of the contract (however he does that) wearing black sneakers, a dark red hoodie, and gray sweatpants, no make-up and with his hair still tussled from sleep. It's the first time they've seen him with no gloves (outside of his pornos) (Where he got the clothes? He and Cherri spent the previous night burning everything Valentino has ever given him (EXCLUDING FAT NUGGETS) and went on a shopping spree for new clothes. She got a little worried when Angel started picking things that went the opposite direction to his usual style, but when Angel said he didn't want to wear something that looked like Val had picked it for him she went ham with choices).

Charlie might worry, not necessarily because it's a bad thing, but because it's such an abrupt chance after such an emotionally charged event that she doesn't know if it's a good or a bad change.

It would be the best day of Alastor's life. 10/10. He compliments Angel once, but in a backhanded kinda way by implying the other way he dressed made him a slut or something like that, saying Angel looks much better covered up, and Angel genuinely thanks him. He's a little freaked out by that last part, but he takes the win.

Husk is worried, tries to have a "wear whatever the fuck you want" kinda conversation. But Angel tells him THIS is what he wants to wear. That the idea of wearing the same things he did while under contract makes him feel sick. Like he's still under Val's thumb.

He would still be hypersexual. His personality wouldn't change, only his wardrobe does. And maybe some words go out of his vocabulary. But he's still a flirt (much to Alastor's chagrin), he still sleeps around (though as we've seen in the show over time it would become less in a self destructive way but more as a genuine interest in doing so. Nothing wrong with one night stands), he would still see the most valuable part of him as what he can do, sexually, for someone.

But dressing differently would make him feel like he has more control over his life.

This... Became longer than I expected. Sorry. I know some people don't post asks that are too much like drabbles, but uuuuhh I hope you don't mind. This is more incoherent character analysis I guess.

-🐇

I love this honestly, I’ve thought about this too! Angel swinging far in the other direction for a bit after he gets freedom from Valentino, trying to figure out what HE likes.

I assume he had to be pretty masculine with his family, and with his death he was able to be more free to explore femininity. But then with Val it went the complete opposite direction.

Him completely having freedom could allow him to explore what he likes, allowing him to form his own connections with femininity/masculinity that goes beyond what others expect from him or what front he has to put up to be “safe.”

I might put this in my list for later because this definitely would be fun to explore! And also I love all these messages im getting from you. They both expand on ideas I’ve had on Angel and also introduce new ones! And makes me more motivated to write something when I have the chance.

#hazbin hotel #angel dust #angel dust hazbin hotel

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majimasleftasscheek · 10 months

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Have you played Yakuza 6 yet? If so ya got any kazumaji head canons based off the events of the game?

I absolutely love your ideas for them and I am beyond upset that Majima was barley in the game. Or even mentioned that much.

They did the boi dirty in this game, I swear.

*clenches my ass hard enough to shit diamonds*

oh I have OPINIONS about 6 I'll tell you that but it is good fodder for the kazumaji agenda 👀 I'mma be kinda rambly in this but I promise it all ties together kdjfjkldfkldf

so we all know Kiryu goes off to find Haruka and because I'm a big fan of dadjima, I can only imagine Kiryu lets him know while he's stuck in jail and Majima's just like WHAT

so Kiryu does a lot of self reflection but acting upon it is another matter. I can see Majima chastising him, saying she ran away cuz that's all Kiryu ever does (part of him is still pissy about him leaving in y3) and she's never had a healthy role model other than the king of hypocrisy. Kiryu would go on about how it's just to protect people yada yada but Majima would be like my guy, you left a bunch of kids in the care of your daughter who should not be parenting for you. you refuse any and all help because you think you can do it all on your own. you left me with Daigo who you said I wouldn't be babysitting AND YET—

I just want Majima to absolutely rail into him about how self serving he's acted despite better intentions. like of course Haruka ran away, look how much pressure she was under, what she went through in the idol bizz (maybe I'm a loser but I did not like Haruka's part in y5 that shit icked me), what you (Kiryu) do every time you feel like a burden to people. how naïve it was to think any part of Kiryu's past would leave him behind just because he wanted it to. how his lone wolf thing impedes on everybody else. how in 5 he literally says he needs to stop running from his past and he does it anyway. this game FRUSTRATES ME rrhrrhhrhrr KIRYU FRUSTRATES ME ACK. but also I have a thing for Majima just being angry at him, to actually lash out and spew all those feelings of being left behind or being refused to let help because Kiryu's stubborn. how he let himself be used all those years to help Kiryu out just because he asked and now once again Kiryu's off on his own, never changing his tune about how he doesn't wanna rely on people. Majima's not perfect either and frankly he communicates like shit too but I just want that RAGE to get out and explore how Kiryu would hear him but never listen. makes it all the more tragic when he finds out Kiryu "died."

*tho I must note, as much as it does irritate me, 6 makes sense entirely for Kiryu's character lol. nothing he does in it surprises me in the slightest so while I'm not a fan of the story, it's pretty fitting for him since he's the downfall of his own story half the time. and it's not so simple as just saying Kiryu's to blame. he's constantly forced to deal with shit just as much as he wants to be left alone. he struggles and he tries hard I'll give him that. I don't think he's a bad person for what he aimed to do in 6 but he's not infallible either. and sometimes it's just par for the course. like how he makes the compromise at the end of the game to disappear so his family can be at peace all the while in his history, he's had major problems doing what he's told - never truly disappearing anyway, going about whatever's gonna happen in gaiden. could you imagine if Haruka caught wind that some resting bitch face motherfucker is beating the shit outta armies somewhere? could you imagine her finding out that Kiryu left again?

honestly I think his character is really interesting cuz of this. he has good intentions and I feel like to him there's some expectation that people should understand this, that people should accept his choices. I think it's fun to explore how others react to that - how it's in a way offensive, that Kiryu thinks he knows what's best and how to handle it as if he has all the power and say. how pissed people feel about him shoving them away for the sake of their safety, etc. I don't think he'd listen to Majima tbh but I think it's important that someone unafraid of Kiryu's dumbassery would lay it out how it is to him in a way that cuts, more so than Haruka, Date or like Akiyama could.

ANYWAY, Majima's mad at him lol but can't really do anything atm due to the surrounding circumstances. I like to think he's got some of the Majima family watching out for Kiryu and Haruka if they happened to see them. Nishida at least cuz ain't no one gonna arrest a cutie patootie like him. it's not much but it's a little peace of mind. Majima knows Kiryu's reckless as all hell so he's worried and doubly annoyed that Kiryu doesn't care (about his own safety or that other people are concerned for him).

so since Majima has a fat 5 minutes in the whole game, there's not much to say about his involvement overall (other than oopsie stuck in jail) but I've had some thoughts about what all the jimas³ are doing in the meantime.

all the jimas are grouped together because I said so even tho realistically they'd prolly be separated lol. Daigo and Saejima are handling things well enough but Majima's bouncing off the walls in boredom and nothing irks him more than being stuck in one spot while Kiryu's out probably getting hit over the head with a stop sign and refusing medical attention. Daigo's losing his mind but he can agree Kiryu's bullheaded and talking about that keeps Majima distracted. Saejima does his part in trying to get Majima's mind off things now that they have all the time in the world to catch up on whatever.

time passes and I'm rewriting the part in 6 where they show up at the end cuz I live in a fantasy world.

Kiryu "dies" and suddenly the three of them are released early, no doubt knowing his death had something to do with it. Daigo gets Kiryu's letter and Majima makes some joke about Kiryu's literacy but a quick scan of the letter makes Daigo's face drop. he reads it and Majima doesn't think it's real. he doesn't know how to feel. even Saejima is in disbelief. but the letter is vague. it's conjecture written by Kiryu of his own death so there's a chance he's fine. Kiryu's fine, he's always fine. he's been shot and stabbed a million times, he's fine.

but it's not long till it's confirmed by Date. Daigo's skeptical cuz his inner punkass doesn't trust cops. Saejima's on the same page but Majima's in full denial whilst also believing it to be true. his reaction is immediate and violent. he wants something to be done, he wants revenge but Daigo wants to follow Kiryu's wish to avoid war. Majima's so outraged he frankly couldn't give less of a shit about Kiryu's wishes so it's up to Saejima to wrangle him back *insert a dramatic fight here.* Majima gets his ass beat and he's just a mess. things move fast though - the fate of the clan is up in the air and he just couldn't care. but Daigo needs him and for that he pulls it together, just barely.

fast forward to when the jimas go into hiding. they get set up in a lil safehouse via Nick Ogata. I like to see it as a basic bitch type of place, very out of the way, very ignorable but the inside is nice enough. they have to stay cooped up as much as possible and it drives Majima insane. he's fidgety, always pacing. Saejima tries to calm him down and it works for a time until Majima falls into another slump and repeats.

they took a few things with them that they could, mostly small stuff, some clothes and the like. Majima brought along a few of Kiryu's things, namely some pocket cars and a shirt. he wears it often, being very against washing it. Daigo's too stressed to notice but Saejima watches Majima just break down into someone he doesn't know. he's tired, closed off, guilt ridden. Saejima starts to think this is who Majima was after getting out of the Hole. a shell of a person taking blame for things out of his control. losing the will to care for himself as some sort of self imposed punishment for not doing more. seething in silence in the powerlessness.

his beard grows scraggly, his hair is unkept and the circles under his eye grows darker everyday. his behavior mimics his Sotenbori days where everything was for Saejima, all he could think about was Saejima, how he failed him, how if he tried hard enough he could see him again. it's not the case with Kiryu though. he didn't even get to see the body himself.

he's always on his phone reliving memories through photos and conversations. he freaks out when anyone touches the pocket cars and eventually the shirt gets worn out. he's spiraling while the others look on, unsure how to deal with someone whose entire personality revolves around having a fake one.

Saejima takes initiative. maybe he's seen Majima like this before or maybe he hasn't. doesn't matter because he gives Majima a bit of tough love, telling him to get a grip. telling him that Kiryu wouldn't want to see him like this and, under his breath, he needs him in better shape so they can beat the shit outta whoever was responsible. it's not easy of course. it takes Majima awhile to learn how to live again and frankly he doesn't want to talk about Kiryu but Saejima forces him to - to get comfortable with mentioning him, enjoying the memories they had. letting him know it's okay to be vulnerable. it's not a kind or pleasant recovery but it's there. it's helping.

and perhaps some time under supervision, he goes to see Haruka and meets Haruto for the first time. he tries to keep a strong façade for her but she can see right through him and gets one of those rare moments where he's just quiet. where he's real. she catches him up on things and it's a rough one for the both of them, especially since he has to keep the visit short. she doesn't bother asking him where he's going afterward but he promises to keep in touch and that he does. she sends him a lot of photos and videos of the family and he backseat-parents Yuta whenever possible. Haruka's never been a fan of always having Kiryu at arms length but this arrangement helps her deal with the long distance since there's effort on both ends to stay close.

Majima's not used to having others around to help him cope but he eases into it decently enough without the Tojo Clan on his shoulders. he even gets along better with Daigo who has time now to focus more on himself and the grunge within his soul. he's a silly lil dork and that charm reminds him of Kiryu but in a way that doesn't send him spiraling. he starts to see all reminders of Kiryu in a more hopeful light, one that brings back his energy. for most of their home confinement, Majima wouldn't even go out as Goromi since half his confidence came from Kiryu's support. but now and then, with Saejima and Daigo backing him, he can tiptoe a bit back into his fav dresses, ones that Kiryu gave him, ones that hurt to put on because of the baggage they carry. he doesn't even have his wigs anymore so he assembles what he can, how he can into something he knows Kiryu would have called pretty regardless. it stills hurts but it helps.

but, he'll always dip back into the pain of it all. missing intimacy and things taken for granted. he regrets his last words with Kiryu were criticisms knowing he's not perfect himself. maybe he's faced with realizations that he can't survive without certain people, that his attachment issues are brought to the forefront for everyone to see. it's ugly and embarrassing and for the first time in a long time he feels very seen. death's always been a reality for him and he's never cared much for it in regards to himself but losing someone so close, so suddenly? without closure or goodbyes? he's forced to deal with the frailty and mortality of someone he thought was invincible.

and it scares him.

#oughoghg messy messy messy #postLAD I imagine the mess is even worse and love it so much even if it makes me shit and cry and throw up #my hcs #kazumaji #yakuza #ryu ga gotoku #kiryu kazuma #majima goro #saejima taiga #my art #dojima daigo #goromi

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llondonfog · 11 months

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let's make no mistake about it, i genuinely find lilia one of the most fascinating characters in twst— a 700 yr old fae who spent centuries as the most revered general of briar valley, confidant to the royal family, did an about-turn to fatherhood immediately upon finding an abandoned baby and now romps around a school campus with said son and the heir apparent to the draconia family pretending to be 680 years younger than he actually is???? fucking insane.

we know absolutely nothing about his own personal life; no immediate family to speak of (besides his adopted son), and we can safely assume they're no longer among the living. we have no idea what his own childhood was like, but i think we can extrapolate by the way that he initially raised silver that it wasn't conventional. were tensions always so high between fae and humans, did lilia simply grow up in a time where war was a common occurrence, that to serve in the briar valley army was the obvious path to take? we can only gather bits and pieces about his previous lifestyle from his card lines, and it would seem that his life prior to silver was a harsh one, with little to no time for personal amusement or exploration of interests.

and one doesn't just become a renown general fitting for the history books by simply leading an army for so many years— it's clear that he was so very good at it. did he too share the fae consensus that humans were not to be trusted, and if so, at what point did that begin to change? was it truly raising silver that altered his perspective? and more to that point, can we assume that he was truly looking for the boy as his new card title suggests? and if so, why? was it for silver's unique magic, did he really come from royalty, was he considered a threat to the draconias? does any of this have to do with the disappearance of malleus' parents so many centuries prior??

i'm so torn between the idea of lilia being instructed to find and raise silver for some greater purpose and over time, realizing how much he's grown to care and love the child, versus the idea of somehow this little baby being enough to give the fierce general pause, to take him in as his own. i also wonder if lilia even proclaimed himself as silver's father to begin with, or if that's simply a title silver gave him on his own and only then did the ramifications of what he meant to the boy truly sink in. it must have been such a shock, the realization that a human could look up at him with such pure love and think of him as a father— for what does he know of rearing a child, and a human one at that? lilia himself even admits this at countless points, and the more we learn of silver's childhood, the more clear it becomes that while the mutual affection is truly there, the understanding of how to properly care for another being of any kind is clearly lacking.

which is understandable when we think of lilia's past experiences— he was simply a guardian, a 'bodyguard' to an extent to malleus, and someone who intervened to provide the kind of life lessons and guidance that an absent father figure could no longer give. but he did not raise the prince, nor was he responsible for caring for him daily. if what we know so far is to be believed, there was little to no time of lilia's role as a general to his departure and caring for silver. for once in his life, he gets to taste the unfettered freedom of no longer shouldering the weight of a nation's protection, and to be frank, goes a little mad with it. it makes sense why he was cavorting around the world while leaving silver at home, he simply never got to enjoy these freedoms before and perhaps selfishly took advantage of that fact while neglecting the ramifications of leaving a child to care for itself (especially one with a narcoleptic condition).

(and even now he kind of seeks that familiar comfort of warfare— we see him gaming as a kind of warlord with idia, which makes sense that he was unable to fully part with that portion of his identity if it truly made up his entire persona for nearly 600 years.)

anyways all this to say that i have no doubt that lilia truly cares for silver. but i think there's something to be said for fae emotional differences, and that he massively underestimates or doesn't know how to acknowledge that silver loves him before even himself. that the things he does to his family (re halloween, his departure party) are ignorantly cruel at best. at the same time, how could you blame him? as a general and being accustomed to loss of life, what is the use of a long, drawn out goodbye? and to have spent the majority of his life in such a mindset, it's understandable, even if reprehensible, to apply this logic to silver, malleus, and sebek. on the flip side, how utterly fascinating how lilia seems to be fooling himself with these forced and abrupt goodbyes— he admits it himself that he fears becoming weak before his family, that vulnerability so at odds with the kind of power and strength he wielded for years.

i have absolutely no idea what the next part of ch7 will bring us, but i really cannot wait to explore more of lilia in his general years, at the height of his glory. and i really do hope that we get the truth of what we all know— his happiest dream, his sweetest memory, being that of when he found silver at last. how fitting would that be, especially for silver who had wept miserably to malleus about his failures to lilia as his son. how fitting to know that lilia does not see him in that way, that his happiest moment that he would choose to relive and dream is the one where he gathers up silver in his arms, and inevitably sets in motion his course to become his father.

#silver you are my darling #my baby boy #but i want to dissect your father like a frog #im so fucking sorry for this rambling stream of consciousness essay #getting all my thoughts out there before the new ch7 drop takes us out with a steel pipe #twst spoilers #i meant this to be a response to olive's reply and then i just. went off the fucking rails aldkfj;ads #lilia vanrouge #twst lilia

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aspoonofsugar · 7 months

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Chuya's Tainted Sorrow

Here comes a meta on my favourite bsd character:

Chuya is mostly explored in the two BSD novels Fifteen and Storm Bringer, so this post covers what happens in these books. In particular, I am going to use Chuya's song, gift and literary references to explore his story.

DARKNESS MY SORROW

Darkness My Sorrow is Chuya's character song and its title combines two different literary references:

Darkness comes from the Sheep Song, which is used to trigger Corruption:

O acquaintances, grantors of dark disgrace, do not wake me again!

Sorrow comes from Upon The Tainted Sorrow, which gives its name to Chuya's ability

Let's discover what these two poems represent.

CHUYA'S DARK DISGRACE (THE SHEEP)

O expectations, stale and dismal airs, leave this body of mine! I want nothing anymore but simplicity, quiet, murmurs and order. O acquaintances, grantors of dark disgrace, do not wake me again! I will endure my solitude, arms seeming already useless. O eyes that open doubtfully, open eyes that stay motionless for a while, ah, heart, that believes in others more than itself, O expectations, stale and dismal airs, leave, leave this body of mine! I enjoy nothing anymore but my wretched dreams. (The Sheep Song, Part II)

The Sheep is Chuya's first group, which welcomes him in as a child. Why is the organization called after this animal? There are several reasons, which tie with Chuya's relationship with his friends.

1 - Chuya is a herding dog

The Sheep's members are normal kids, but Chuya guards their territory and punishes trespassers violently. This is the behaviour of herding dogs, which are famous for their aggressiveness towards outsiders.

"Everyone's waiting for you to give this enemy a beatdown! That's the only way we Sheep can protect our turf! We've only made it this far because everyone knows they can't mess with us!" (Shirase in Fifteen)

2 - Chuya is a sheep among wolves

"Chuuya's got all that berserk firepower, but here he's like sheep getting stared down by a wolf." (Dazai in Fifteen)

Chuya's relationship with the Sheep is exploitative and toxic. The other kids use Chuya's love and wish to belong to control him. All in all, Chuya is used as a pawn for the organization's well being:

"We Sheep took you in when you had no family and nowhere to go, but you already gave us more than enough in return. That's why... it's time to rest... after dying and contributing to the Sheep one last time." (Shirase in Fifteen)

3 - Chuya is the King of the Sheep

Luois I, King of the Sheep is a children book about a sheep, who finds a crown. He puts it on and becomes King. The point of the story is that Luois I is like other sheep, but chance and a superficial attribute turn him into a royal.

Chuya sees himself in the same way:

"I'm not a King," the boy, Chuuya Nakahara, spat. "I just happen to have something no one else does: power. I'm simply fulfilling the responsibility I have." (Fifteen)

Chuya's "crown" is his gravity manipulation gift that sets him apart from others. He even calls it a "good card", so something luck gives him.

Luois I lets the crown get to his head and believes he is above others. Chuya instead really wants to be part of the flock:

Chuuya wasn't anyone special; he didn't have a skill, either. He was just a regular member of the group. He wasn't the king, he had no powers, he wasn't the center of attention - he was simply a single Sheep among the flock, chatting with his friends. (Chuya's wish in Storm Bringer)

However, his ability is so powerful that it is the Sheep kids, who forget Chuya is a teenage boy just like them:

"Chuuya's covered in wounds. I've never seen him like that. He looks just like a regular guy my age. Wait, no - he doesn't just look like one. He is my age. He's a boy just like me." (Shirase in Storm Bringer)

In short, Chuya doesn't want to be the Sheep King, but he is forced into the role by the crown of power:

"Shut up! If you think you can become king, then do it! You can have this power!" Chuuya howled, unable to take it any longer. "To hell with power! If I didn't have this skill, I'd still be with you guys...!" (Storm Bringer)

Still, gifts are metaphors of the characters' interiority. So, what does Chuya's abnormous skill symbolize? What is the real flaw that defines Chuya's relationships and gets in their way?

"Once there was this boy who could amplify the skill of anyone he touched. Super convenient. So what do you think would happen if he used it on himself instead of someone else? (...) He amplified the skill to amplify the other skill, which amplified the skill to amplify skills that amplify skills. This self-referencing continued nonstop as he endlessly amplified his own skill." (N in Storm Bringer)

Storm Bringer reveals that the origin of Chuya's gravity manipulation is the gift to make other skills more powerful. The user applies his gift on himself and makes it stronger and stronger until infinite energy is created and space warps. So, Chuya's singularity is born: a gift able to control gravity. In other words:

The original ability is to make others stronger

If the ability is used on one-self (so that the wielder can become more powerful and make others even more powerful), then a contradiction arises and a monstruous skill appears

This process is a representation of Chuya's tendency to grow stronger for others' sake. He hones his fighting skills to protect the Sheep (to make them stronger), but this turns them too dependent on him (an organizational vulnerability). What a good leader should do is instead to nurture his people, so that they can be independent and strong:

“A leader is both the head of the organization and the organization’s slave. For the survival and the profit of the organization, they gladly put themselves through any manner of filth. They develop their subordinates and place them where they best fit. And, if necessary, they use and dispose of them. For the sake of the organization, they take on any act of barbarism with glee. That is a leader. All for the organization, and for the protection of this beloved city.” (Mori in Fifteen)

This is Chuya's mistake and the reason why the Sheep disbands. Chuya falls short as a leader not because he isn't as smart as Dazai or Mori (if anything, I think he is going to be a better leader than both). Rather, he fails because he doesn't know how to depend on others:

"It's because you are our friend. Were things different with the Sheep?" They had been. That was what Chuuya's flustered expression was saying. Everyone in the Sheep depended on him. The contrary was unthinkable. (Storm Bringer)

He insists on doing everything by himself, but a leader should work with his subordinates. This is what Chuya lacks in Fifteen and what he sails up to learn.

Still, to succeed Chuya needs to face the origin of this flaw, which lies in how he perceives himself:

O eyes that open doubtfully, open eyes that stay motionless for a while, ah, heart, that believes in others more than itself

Chuya sees himself as inferior to others. This complex makes him willing to be used, if it means he belongs somewhere:

LONELY DARKNESS MY SORROW, once it is opened by the key I'd rather just fall than go back to being alone Staring at the destroyed cage of this self, (GRAVITY) Slowly, I sing, "Not bad at all."

This is the key stanza of Chuya's song, which reveals what Chuya's darkness really is. Loneliness. Chuya is scared of being alone, so he does his best to conform to others' wishes. For example, he dresses like those around him not to stick out.

Chuuya, age fifteen - He wears sportsy clothes, with several sheep symbols:

Chuuya, age sixteen - He wears a formal attire with much black in it. Perfect mafia-style:

However, he can't escape his interior pain, which metaphorically manifests in Corruption:

O acquaintances, grantors of dark disgrace, do not wake me again! I will endure my solitude, arms seeming already useless.

It is not by chance that the verses, which open Chuya's gate affirm the poet's solitude. That is because deep down Corruption is just this. Chuya's isolation.

THE TAINTED SORROW (ARAHABAKI)

Upon the Tainted Sorrow, Today, the snowflakes fall so harsh. Upon the Tainted Sorrow, Today, even the strong wind gusts. The Tainted Sorrow is Just like a fox’s hooded fur. The Tainted Sorrow is Covered by snowflakes and it cowers. The Tainted Sorrow has Nothing to desire and nothing to wish. The Tainted Sorrow has A dream of death to its wary self. Upon the Tainted Sorrow, Trembling like a pitiful soul. Upon the Tainted Sorrow, Nowhere to belong, the sun sets... (Upon The Tainted Sorrow)

Corruption is a state where Chuya gives up his body to Arahabaki. What is this entity? In universe, it is a singularity, a self-contradicting skill able to create infinite power. It metaphorically represents two things:

Everyone's objectification of Chuya

A part of Chuya himself

1 - Chuya's life is defined by others reducing him to a skill

-N and the Government kidnap, abuse and clone Chuya because of his self-contradicting gift. It is not the two kids (the original and the clone) they are interested in. Rather, they reduce them to their special abilities:

"Just like how we respect your will, we respect the will of your skill Arahabaki, as well. But... how should I put this? Your will is tying Arahabaki down, and as long as your will is firm, we won't be able to remove Arahabaki from you." (N in Storm Bringer)

N says it oudloud. He respects Arahabaki's will more than Chuya's. Except that Arahabaki has no will:

"Sigh... Why do you wanna see it so bad?" Chuuya said. "It doesn't have a personality or a mind of its own, so what's meeting' it gonna do for you? You gonna pray to it because it's a god? It's a god of destruction, y'know. Nothing more than a mass of energy. It's no different from a typhoon or an earthquake. Ya might as well pray to a power plant." (Fifteen)

Arahabaki is not a person, but the embodyment of Chuya's gift. And yet, it is given a name and treated as more important than the kid.

-Rimbaud literally wants to turn Chuya into a skill:

"Allow me to reintroduce myself. Rimbaud. Arthur Rimbaud. My skill is called Illuminations. Chuuya, my goal is to kill you and absorb you into my skill" (Rimbaud in Fifteen)

He doesn't want to kill Dazai because he hates murdering children. And yet, Chuya is Dazai's same age. However, Rimbaud sees him as nothing, but Arahabaki's host.

-Verlaine wants Chuya to be his clone:

"I dunno about you, but I'm human." "You aren't human. You're 2,383 lines of code." (Chuya and Verlaine in Storm Bringer)

He denies Chuya's humanity and insists he is an artificial creation. Chuya can't be the original kidnapped child, but needs to share Verlaine's origins and hate for the world. Verlaine doesn't consider his brother a person, but an extension of himself.

2- Arahabaki is Chuuya's inner beast

In psychology, the beast is a personification of one's deepest and most repressed feelings. What are Chuya's?

His control on gravity suggests two strong emotions:

a) A lack of freedom - The ability to control gravity should make one freer. And yet, Chuya is always chained:

He spends his childhood imprisoned in a lab. He is used as an attack dog by the Sheep. He is threatened to join the mafia with his friends' lives and Rimbaud's secret files. In a sense, he always serves someone. That is why Arahabaki is a servant deity.

b) A huge existential weight - He can make things lighter, but he still shoulders too much:

"Tell me, tin man," Chuuya suddenly stated, his voice devoid of all emotion. "Why did they die?" "Because of you, Chuuya." Silence. "Yeah, it is my fault." (Chuuya and Adam in Storm Bringer)

For example, Chuya blames himself for what happens with the Sheep, the Flags and later on Adam:

"What's wrong, Chuuya? Everyone's going to die at this rate. You're going to kill them. Your shortcomings are going to kill them." (Verlaine in Storm Bringer)

Chuya fears whoever gets close to him dies. That is why Arahabaki is a god of destruction.

Points 1 and 2 explain Chuya's loneliness. On the one hand others only see his skill (objectification). On the other hand Chuya doesn't see himself (struggle with the beast).

Arahabaki is a god whose origins are uncertain, so nobody understands it. Not even Chuya:

'In languor dreams of death' … who was the one that said it?

In the song, Chuya wonders who is the author of his own poem. This shows how disconnected he is from himself. He wears a mask of violence and bravado to hide his vulnerability. Still, this fragility emerges every time he lets Arahabaki out. Here comes the interpretative key of Chuya's character...

Arahabaki is nothing, but the Tainted Sorrow of the poem:

The tainted sorrow is a fox covered in snow, while the wind howls:

Black snow began fluttering around Chuuya. Red scar-like runes crawled across his skin. He ignored the law of physics, hovering in the sky, as he glared down at the beast on the surface. Intense heat caused by the gamma radiation filled the air. The night was scorched, and the scenery warped. (Storm Bringer)

Arahabaki-Chuya is described as a tailed-beast and the anime shows he is similar to a fox. Moreover, he is covered in black snow, while his gravity powers manifest a strong wind.

The rest of the verses convey Chuya's feelings:

The Tainted Sorrow has Nothing to desire and nothing to wish. The Tainted Sorrow has A dream of death to its wary self. Upon the Tainted Sorrow, Trembling like a pitiful soul. Upon the Tainted Sorrow, Nowhere to belong, the sun sets...

Interestingly, the fox and the setting sun come up in Storm Bringer:

The video showed a golden coin. One side was engraved with a fox, the other with the moon. It was beautiful yet somewhat melancholy. (Storm Bringer)

The young Chuya repeats Upon the Tainted Sorrow while playing with a coin that has a fox and a moon on its sides.

The literary metaphor becomes clear. The Sheep Song is the key to open the Tainted Sorrow's gate. Chuya activates Corruption through verses, that state his loneliness. He says them, when he is ready to face the darkest part of himself.

WHAT IS CHUYA?

The Tainted Sorrow has Nothing to desire and nothing to wish. The Tainted Sorrow has A dream of death to its wary self.

The Tainted Sorrow dreams of death, which means Chuya is suicidal.

This is why he is both drawn and repulsed by Dazai:

"Your birth itself was a mistake. We're the same. Is there really a point to suffering through all that pain for a life that isn't even real?" The voice was taunting him. "Shut up," Chuuya spat, but even he knew he was talking to himself. "Screw you, Dazai." "That's just proof that you at least somewhat believe what I'm saying. Because deep down inside, you're the same as me." (Storm Bringer)

Dazai is the Chuya, who regrets being born and wishes to die. Still, he is also the Chuya, who wants to live, despite it all:

Chuya quietly stared at Daai's expression as if he were searching for something human deep inside of him. "So you're saying... you want to live now?" "I wouldn't go that far," Dazai replied with a resigned smile. "Maybe I won't find anything, but I figure I'll give it a try." (Fifteen)

The Tainted Sorrow wishes nothing because it isn't a person. Chuya fears he has no will of his own because he isn't human:

Chuuya Nakahara didn't dream. For him, waking up was like a bubble emerging from within mud. (Storm Bringer)

This fear is why Chuya's friendship with Adam is so important.

Adam is a an artificial creation, like Chuya. He is even called after the Frankenstein monster. He is a robot programmed to destroy himself for the sake of his mission:

"This is the real reason why an android was sent, instead of a human detective. My core, which now contains state secrets, will be incinirated along with Verlaine." (Adam in Storm Bringer)

Adam is a person, like Chuya. He is even called after the first man. He is a friend, who chooses to sacrifice himself for a loved one:

"I get to protect you. I couldn't ask for more." (Adam in Storm Bringer)

Dazai and Adam are linked to life and humanity, which are the main themes of Chuya's arc in the novels.

They both get to keep on living together with Chuya:

Dazai curled into the fetal position and screamed, "Dying with Chuuya? Anything but thaaaat!!" (Storm Bringer)

"Would you like to hear an android joke, Master Chuuya?" (Adam revealed as alive at the end of Storm Bringer)

Fittingly, Storm Bringer ends with the three of them together and alive. Chuya loses several friends, but by the end he still has two bonds. Two people who survive their friendship with him.

Even more importantly, Dazai and Adam both care about Chuya's humanity:

"Chuuya's gonna kill N at this rate and lose his humanity, but I want to see him suffer as a human. That's why I have to stop him" (Dazai in Storm Bringer)

"Do you know whether Master Chuuya is human?" I was curiously hopeful that he would know the truth. (Adam in Storm Bringer)

Not only that, but they help Chuya finish his arc and find himself:

Then what is a soul? My friend's final words... What if those words were merely the words of a soulless command? So what? (Chuya in Storm Bringer)

Dazai gives Chuya a choice and Adam helps Chuya make it.

Dazai believes in Chuya's humanity more than anyone else:

"You sound like you're certain he's human." "I am." Dazai sighed, smiling. "There's no way I could hate a man-made character string this much." (Storm Bringer)

N, Shirase, Rimbaud and Verlaine all reduce Chuya to a skill. Dazai instead sees Chuya as his own person. Sure, he finds Chuya annoying, but he is the only one, who interacts with Chuya for who he is, rather than what he can do.

Adam realizes Chuya is human no matter his origins:

"Asleep or not, he is just an ordinary human," Chuuya replied indifferently. "his skill is strong, but that's it. He gets mad, he worries... That doesn't seem to be enough for him, though." "You are exactly right. It appears you have reached the conclusioin you needed to arrive at." (Chuya and Adam in Storm Bringer)

The Flags, Verlaine, Dazai and Chuya himself are focused on uncovering Chuya's birth. Is he the original kid or the clone? Discovering the truth is everyone's goal. Still, by the end Adam realizes Chuya's nature doesn't matter. He is Chuya either way. He is the person who teaches Adam about humanity. He is Adam's first friend.

Thanks to both Dazai and Adam, Chuya finally faces himself and activates Corruption. Not only that, but Chuya's final choice to let Arahabaki out is a perfect example of how he interprets freedom:

Even though it feels like I might be trapped, there is no room for sentiments I'll push myself to the limit and dye everything jet-black The world is a bird cage, faded in colour Even if I lament, I can't get out of this prison BUT NOW, DARKNESS MY SORROW I have not yet fallen apart So, as I laugh off this imposed inconvenience Let's overturn even the heavens and the earth (GRAVITY)

Chuya is trapped in many ways and he knows it. He is given a gift he doesn't want and he is forced to join an organization he dislikes. And yet, he makes all these "imposed inconveniences" his. Chuya accepts the "card he is given" and uses it the best he can.

He combines his gift with martial arts, so that it really becomes his own ability:

He finds his own motivation to work for the mafia:

"I chose to join the Mafia on my own, and I'm never gonna be your lackey, much less your dog!" (Chuuya to Dazai in Fifteen)

He doesn't open the gate when N forces him, but he chooses to on his own terms.

It is really not by chance that in Chuya's first big fight in the manga, this happens:

Chuya claims there is no choice, but he is still the one who decides to activate Corruption. Even when trapped, Chuya always pushes forward and plays the hand he is dealt with passion. Even if he is unsure of who he is, he lives on as himself.

WHO IS CHUYA?

Chuuya took off one of his leather riding gloves and gazed at his hand. This is my hand, he thought. (Storm Bringer)

Chuya is a person. He has always been, no matter if he is the original or the clone. He feels pain, happiness, surprise. He is able to bond and to empathize with others. All of this makes him human. Not only that, but all of this makes him Chuya.

It is interesting that by the end, many people who objectify Chuya, recognize his personhood.

Shirase sees him as the teenage he is and saves him

Mori traps Chuya in the mafia, but is touched by Chuya's passion and loyalty:

Both Rimbaud and Verlaine eventually see who Chuya is:

"Chuuya, you already possess strength and talents all your own, separate from Arahabaki. You are strong not as a god but as a human being." (Rimbaud in Fifteen)

"Does that mean... you do not yet resent the world?" "There's people I hate, but not all of'em," replied Chuuya. "I know better than to try and live a solitary existence. You used to feel the same, right?" Verlaine didn't respond. It was as if his silence itself was his answer. (Storm Bringer)

And tell him to live on:

"Chuuya... can I... ask you... a favor?" "What is it?" "Live" Randou said in almost a whisper. (Fifteen)

"Chuuya-live." (Verlaine in Storm Bringer)

Chuya manages to inspire all these people. At the same time, he is inspired back by them:

I was blessed with wonderful friends. That's all. I could have been in your situation, and you could have been in mine. (Chuya to Verlaine in Storm Bringer)

He integrates all his loved ones in who he is:

He (probably) imitates Hirotsu's habit to wear gloves and to take them away, when he is getting serious. This mannerism partially substitutes his practice to fight with the hands in the pockets

He is given his motorcycle by Albatross and keeps it as a memory of the Flags

He wears Verlaine's hat, which is really a gift from all three Chuya's key parental figures:

1- Rimbaud creates it for Verlaine

Once Verlaine puts on the hat, the fabric lining acts like coils, deflecting any external command sequences that could tamper with his mind. In other words, the wearer can control command sequences at will. With this hat, Verlaine is one step closer to becoming a human with free will. (Rimbaud in Storm Bringer)

2- Verlaine passes it down to Chuya

"You really like that hat, huh? That was his, right?" "Yeah, I'd rather not wear my brother's hand-me-downs, but it's got some pretty useful functions." (Shirase and Chuya in Storm Bringer)

3- Mori gives it to Chuya as a gift when he joins the mafia

"What's the hat for?" "It signifies your acceptance into the Mafia," Mori explained with a smile as he stood facing Chuuya. "Whoever recruits a new member into the organization usually looks after them as well. It's custom to gift the new recruit with something they can wear as a symbol of that bond." (Fifteen)

As a result, Chuya's hat is an object full of symbolism:

Within the darkness, a shadow of a hat lightly dances.

It is both shadow (a shadow of a hat) and light (within the darkness, it dances). On the one hand it is the key to Corruption, so to chaos. On the other hand it gives Chuya the power to control this chaos to an extent.

It is both what grants Chuya's free will and what threatens his autonomy:

It describes Chuya's bond with Mori, which is contradictory. Mori blackmails Chuya to join the mafia and controls him. He also offers Chuya a family (heart) and an insight on leadership (mind).

It represents Chuya's bond with Rimbaud and Verlaine, who are Chuya's literary parents, as their real life counterparts inspired Chuya Nakahara's poetry. In general, Chuya's past lowkey alludes to the true poet's one, at least metaphorically.

Nakahara Chuya is born in a rather wealthy family and forced by his father to pursue medicine studies. However, he discovers poetry when he is 8 years old and his younger brother dies. Later on, he rebels against his father's education and is inspired by Rimbaud and Verlaine's works. He imitates both their poems and their dandy life-style.

Similarly, BSD Chuya finds himself trapped until he is symbolically awaken to literature (break out of the lab) by Rimbaud and Verlaine. Here, his poetry (Upon The Tainted Sorrow) is set free and Chuya is reborn:

Those newborn cries filled the outside world in the form of flames. The raging flames brought destruction to the surface for as far as the eye could see. And thus, " " was born. (Fifteen)

Interestingly, Chuya is 7 or 8, when Rimbaud and Verlaine arrive in his life. Moreover, his survival and freedom come at the cost of his other self (his clone/the original Chuya). Just like Nakahara Chuya's first poem is the result of his grief for his brother's death.

In other words, Chuya is Rimbaud and Verlaine's literary child. He is what their bond leaves behind. This is why initially they both strongly project on Chuya, but eventually let him go. Isn't it normal for a parent to see themselves in their child? And isn't it normal for the child to imitate the parents to an extent? And yet, the child is his own person. Just like this, Chuya is strongly defined by both Rimbaud and Verlaine, but he is growing into himself:

"It's okay. The Port Mafia is my family now" (Chuya in Storm Bringer)

So, who is Chuya? It's easy, really. He is a Port Mafia Executive (and probably the next Port Mafia boss). Right now, he needs to define his role within the organization and outside Mori. As a matter of fact, Mori is Chuya's third father, so to become an adult, Chuya needs to outgrow him. Just like he did with Rimbaud and Verlaine. Only then, he will truly choose who Chuya Nakahara is.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #chuya nakahara #nakahara chuya #chuuya nakahara #nakahara chūya #bsd meta #bungou stray dogs meta #my meta #chuya is so rich #i actually cut several things #like his bond with both mori and dazai or his set-up to be a leader #oh well #hope it is still enjoyable :)

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a-chip-in-inosukes-nichirin · 4 months

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Upper Moon Demons at the Gym

I did the Hashira already, but I wanted to explore the upper moons (plus Muzan and a few of the lower moons). If y'all wanna see the other characters (Tanjiro, Nezuko, Zenitsu, Inosuke, Genya, Tamayo, Yuichiro, etc.) let me know.

Lower Moons + Muzan

Enmu:

Does an astonishing amount of leg workouts. Only wears bulky/baggy clothing. Says milk is better than protein shakes. Will hang around the gym to gawk at other's workouts. Confuses everyone at the gym with weird personal questions while they're in the middle of sets.

Rui:

Refuses to go to the gym. If he does get dragged there by his family, he sits and watches videos on his phone. If there is a pool, he can be convinced to swim, but only in the shallow end. He will take pictures of people to make fun of them. He's been banned from one gym for this.

Muzan:

Takes private fencing lessons and only works out in the privacy of his own home as he thinks the gym is unsanitary. Will try any and every protein shake and pre-workout, obsessed with staying fit and young-looking. Takes every supplement known to man. Wears joggers and muscle shirts. Hates sweating and mostly just walks a lot on his treadmill at home, despite having several other pieces of gym equipment.

Upper Moons

Kokushibo:

Wears a sweatshirt and joggers at all times, never seems to sweat even when he is exerting himself. He prefers extracurriculars such as akido and karate but goes to the gym to supplement his classes. Thinks pre-workout and protein shakes are scams.

Douma:

Only works out enough to stay physically fit and attractive. Will make unnecessary comments to people at the gym, especially women. He always seems to weasel his way back into gyms after getting kicked out because of his smooth tongue. He spends a lot of time lounging around in the tightest shirts he can buy. Has been sponsored by workout brands for clothing and supplements for his charisma and pretty eyes. There is usually a spike in sales after Douma does a commercial or ad, so he's a highly coveted model.

Akaza:

Does a lot of calisthenics and weights. He will also sprint on treadmills but focuses on building upper and lower body muscle groups. Can do more pull-ups than any of the moons. Wears wife beaters and joggers, basketball shorts if he's going to be running on the treadmills. He's generally a good gym goer but tends to challenge other gym goers to competitions. Kyojuro is the only one who has kept up with him in a challenge. Akaza lives off of pre-workout and protein shakes. He is responsible for getting Douma kicked out of a couple gyms, and vice versa- neither of them can attend the same gym without it coming to a head eventually.

Hantengu:

Hantengu- is an old man who will go to the gym to stare at girls doing squats. He doesn't do much else, except biking on occasion.

Sekido- has gotten in trouble for slamming weights and yelling at his brothers in the gym. He spends most of his time with dumbbells and on the bench-pressing weights while grunting loudly. Only drinks pre-workout, and probably hasn't had a proper glass of water since starting at the gym. He will drag his brothers to the gym and then complain about them being there.

Karaku- is pretty well rounded at the gym, trying out new things and never really sticking to a specific plan. As long as he feels sore by the end, he doesn't care to target anything specific. He will loudly talk and conversate with other gym-goers, and there are actually a few gym employees who like chatting with him. Will eat or drink anything given to him.

Urogi- likes to do parkour and tends to enjoy cardio more than his brothers. He will also attempt to talk to other gym goers but will also nit-pick the way they workout while giving somewhat backhanded compliments. Likes pre-workout but will not drink protein shakes. Wears loose clothing like basketball shorts and oversized t-shirts.

Aizetsu- hates going to the gym and is always asking when they are leaving. He wears oversized hoodies and sweatpants, and exclusively does ellipticals and biking. He will do stretching if no one else is around. Strictly drinks water and tries to never make eye contact with anyone at the gym.

Zohakuten- Gets dragged along with his brothers to the gym even though he hates going. Thinks all of the women there are skanks no matter how they are dressed and makes no attempt to hide his contempt for others. He made a comment on Mitsuri at one point which mysteriously resulted in him accidentally eating a snack that contained peanuts and having an allergic reaction (they never found the culprit, but others have suspicions about a certain black-haired man who wears masks to the gym).

Gyokko:

Wears the weirdest clothes to the gym and is constantly muttering or having full-on conversations with himself/at people about art and the human body. He does very little exercise, stating he mainly comes to the gym for inspiration in his art. He hasn't caused any major trouble, so he hasn't been banned or kicked out, but people tend to avoid him at all costs as he gives a lot of them the creeps- men and women alike.

Daki:

She, like Mitsuri, wears cute matching sets to the gym, but they tend to be more revealing. Daki has also gotten a lot of modeling and ad contracts for workout brands, although her modeling career extends beyond the gym. Daki has been asked out no less than seventeen times while at the gym, all of which she declined. She spends a lot of time preening in the mirrors between sets, and judging people both in her head and out loud. She only drinks protein shakes that are sweet and makes Gyutaro mix them up for her.

Gyutaro:

He only attends the gym because Daki goes. His crippling self-esteem issues force him to wear dark oversized and baggy clothing. Gyutaro sticks to any machines that are inconspicuous and don't draw attention to himself. He has never once slammed his plates, afraid that it will make people look at him. The only time he is okay with people seeing him is when Daki is dealing with a persistent admirer, and she needs him to act as a physical barrier and guard dog. He will only drink energy drinks.

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warsamongthestars · 2 months

Text

One of the most interesting things about TCWs Rex's character arc struggles is that, he's constantly put into contrasts.

Rex, as we know him, stands to be the main representation of a Clone Trooper. He's the first major named CT Character, that isn't Commander Cody, who doesn't have any ties to the films (Unlike Commander Cody), and thus can act and be written with far more freedom to explore.

[ You can't write Commander Cody too much by the end of the day, because one, years of expectations weigh, and two, he still has to shoot Kenobi at the end of everything. ]

Rex has two major conflicts in his arc, that represent the three defining points of clone troopers:

Loyalty to their Brothers

Loyalty to the System

Loyalty to themselves

Let's have some examples.

Our first major touch up with this, is the exact Opposite of all three: Sergeant Slick.

He is not loyal to his brothers (And gets a lot of them killed, whilst blaming the Jedi), he is not loyal to the system (He's a traitor), and he's not loyal to himself (He will make a lot of claims... which are unsubstantiated, because he gets a lot of people killed for purposes of greed and perceived slights).

This one is your easy Villain. Its easy to see, via Slick, that Loyalty to Brothers, Systems and Self is very simple.

But TCWs takes it a step further into complication.

Cut Lawquane, a deserter, is not loyal to the system (because it certainly isn't loyal to him), is loyal to himself, but is neutral when comes to brotherly loyalty.

( I say neutral, because he was willing to slay Rex if it meant staying free and his family safe. He did stop, because he's true to himself, and the self he wants to be isn't someone who kills people... Its just that sometimes, what is wanted, and what it is needed, isn't always the same thing. )

This is the first major bang up to Rex's Character Arc, because now we have a decent enough brother who is absolutely Not Loyal To the System that Rex is. And eventually, Rex lets him go, showing that while Rex is Lawful Good--he leans more towards good, whilst still retaining lawful plausibility.

This step slapped Rex, but it was a surprise he could easily, just simply, file away and not think about too hard. Deserting is going to happen when you're in an army of millions, and if they're off to be farmers instead of soldiers, well that's okay and a very nice thought.

The real kicker was Umbara.

One could argue that the Lola Sayu Mission should've hit Rex, but instead of Rex, it hit Fives the hardest (And with good reason). It's probably why there was an implication of a fallout between Lola Sayu and Umbara ("Just like Old times, Rex.")

And Fives becomes a contrasting challenge:

Loyal to Self

Loyal To Brothers

Neutral to Disloyal to System

Fives would bend the system until it breaks if it meant saving his brothers and more. He's the Chaotic Good to Rex's Lawful Good.

Rex is painfully upright and loyal to the system, so when one of his best and closest brothers decides "fuck this", it shakes him up.

Especially when Rex is finally confronted with how rotten the System gets: by General Pong Krell.

To contrast the contrast, on other side of Rex is Dogma, who is Fives' opposite. The Lawful Neutral.

Loyal to the System above all Else.

Neutral to Disloyal to Brothers.

( It does not help that Anakin Skywalker only recognizes Lawful as being Obedient rather than "adherence and or comfort to a code or set of rules" and thus draws more parallels between Rex and Dogma, than Rex and Fives. )

The Umbara Arc throws Rex through the whole loop, with all its conflicts. Especially the challenges it would make to Rex's whole character and showing him how far things can go.

Until finally, Rex finding what lines to draw in the dirt when it comes to "Loyalty to the End".

... But not enough to save anyone.

Then comes the Conspiracy arc, and while we don't know Rex's side, we do have implication of the aftermath.

The coverup of Fives' death (Because it would've had to been), by brother no less (Another big thing), and with the chip arc, which Rex did look into--would've put Rex up against someone he could not and would not possibly be capable of working through or against: Anakin Skywalker.

( Obviously for narrative purposes, Skywalker can't be stopped less TCWs became an AU instead )

Rex finds that his closest and brightest was labeled traitor and terrorist for his attack on the chancellor, via the very same bulletin points that Rex's character lives by, and it would immediately put him up against Skywalker.

The reason being, is that Skywalker is close to the Chancellor, and likely told Rex to drop any investigation.

And through speculation based on aftermath episodes... and What we know by this point...

I bet that Rex did not want to lump Anakin with Krell as a "System Problem". Because Rex worked with Anakin, and Rex's character falls in line with Anakin, and to consider Anakin to be part of the problem would go against Rex's character--thus, it is "unthinkable" and much easier to simply... Believe that Anakin has the best intentions.

( Even if that came at the cost of Fives. )

( Even though it would come at the cost of the 501st in the future--Rex only did enough that it would save his Life, and Ahsoka's, but nobody else's. He pays dearly for that comfort in Anakin at the cost of Fives, and the cost of Everyone. )

Moving to S7... and the Bad Batch.

Rex comes up against his absolute Opposite once more--in Sergeant Hunter, and the various Bad Batchers.

We've hit full circle.

Hunter commands a small squad that he pretty much lets do whatever, whilst Rex hangs on commands and commanding. Hunter is Evasive, Rex is Honest; Hunter gets stressed by Command, Rex does not.

Hunter is endlessly snarky, whilst Rex is straightforward. Hunter loses his faith midway through Mission, and Rex does not. Hunter's appearance is against all regulations, whilst Rex is clean shaven.

Hunter wasn't made for command, he just wasn't the stronger personality in the Batch to cause problems, whilst Rex is trained and made to command.

The one thing they do have in common, is loyalty to brothers, and the difference is--Rex doesn't hang on to anyone in lieu of the bigger picture, but Hunter does, existing in the smaller pictures.

( That's the TCWs implication-- If I went into the TBBshow, Hunter would not be coming out nearly as good. )

With the other batchers, Rex comes up against each one being individually against an aspect of his character.

Tech is disloyal to the system, he's as far from any sort of clone soldier you can get, and he's not even dressed for it. Tech comes in as a research first.

Wrecker is disloyal to self, bolstering about his skills and making light of the situation before it crashes on him. His disloyalty isn't a case of selling out--its a case of simply not considering himself in any measure. He puts others above him.

Crosshair is disloyal to brothers. He makes it a point to start shit in the middle of a mission, question authority, making disparaging remarks, and attacking a sense of self. The difference here is that, instead of accumulating falsehoods (like Slick), or physically attacking--he attacks the comforting falsehoods that a clone trooper would take on out of loyalty to brothers, system and self. If you're a brother, why don't you act it. If you cared so much for this one guy, why did you leave him behind. If you were that good in your little system, why did the specialists get called in. ( Crosshair is also a dick, but one can understand why he does things. )

Each Bad Batcher serves as a challenge to Rex's character. They are as far from Lawful as possible--but they are Good.

And then there was Echo.

But Echo doesn't serve as a challenge to Rex's character. If anything, Echo might serve as the "reward" for Rex's character arc. He saved at least one Brother, and one of his closest.

...

Unfortunately, Rex's full character arc wasn't ever really fully realized, because he is, fundamentally, a satellite character for other characters to bounce off of, even if those characters are other Clone Troopers.

( hell, Rex serves to contrast Cody, and neither of those too really had full Arcs )

Its why Fives took more attention in Umbara than Rex. Its why Ahsoka gets off scott free at the end of the day but Rex doesn't.

Its why when certain points of Jedi pop up, particularly that even our main character Jedi aren't really all that Lawful Good and do fuck up and waste a lot of brothers' lives for it, that Rex does not intervene.

Because, his character was never given that development to step in and tell someone to "Hey, stop, you are going to get people Killed."

A full Arc would've allowed that, and he wasn't afforded one.

A post TCWs Arc for Rex to get that Development, to fully understand all he went through and implement it into a new character arc, was implied with Rebel's Rex... but is currently unfulfilled.

( Don't be shocked that I don't consider TBBshow to count. )

But there ya go, a nice sum Analysis on Rex.

#star wars #star wars the clone wars #the clone wars #the bad batch #tcws tbb arc #umbara #captain rex #analysis

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mdhwrites · 14 days

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do you think odalia should of had more depth?

So weirdly enough, I think this is an incorrect question because it implies Odalia by herself is important. A story needs to understand the usefulness of its characters after all, what their purpose is, etc. like that. For a lot of essentially one off characters, say Viney or Vee for example, a hint of depth but not exploring it is smart because you allow your fans to imagine what they could be like but they don't get in the way of the story you're telling. One off villains especially fall into this because their point much more often than anything else is simply to instigate a conflict. That's it.

I do not deride the vast majority of S1 villains for being one note. In fact, a lot of them are more fun for their simplicity. As Odalia is essentially a one off villain just meant for Amity's growth, because she's her daughter, she shouldn't need depth because she is just an obstacle to be conquered.

...That whole part 'Amity's her daughter' is a bit of a problem though, isn't it?

See, the minute you tie a villain to a main character, that starts complicating things. The more their relationship has effected either side, their narrative role starts to warp. They are suddenly a large figure within this person's life and so not only is defeating them a much bigger, more complicated affair but also that the villain's character is going to make or break critical elements of a main character's influences and backstory. They can no longer be one note unless their role was one note.

So instead of 'Should Odalia have had more depth' the better question is 'Is more depth for Odalia necessary for her place in the narrative related to Amity?' That requires us to define what her role in Amity's life is. What in theory her actions as told by Amity set her up as.

Odalia before S2 is a parent who has enforced onto Amity the need for social standing, power and exceptionalism. She also has so much power over Amity's life as to dictate who she can and can't be friends with and we can assume by the cruelty that Amity and the twins enact upon others, even within their own family, that this competition is inherent to the Blight family as a whole.

HOWEVER.

Also before S2, we see cracks of kindness within all of this. Odalia still caring enough to make sure Amity gets her lunch. Odalia overlooking the twins' bad behavior, despite Hexside seeming like the sort of school that would have called Odalia over them skipping class. Amity does not appear to fear repercussions from her mother anymore when it comes to her friend group as she befriends Luz and Willow without seemingly any fear of retribution (especially Luz) and discards Boscha and her entire old friend group without any real effort. This implies that Odalia isn't as controlling as Understanding Willow implies because her children actually have an incredible amount of freedom and free will. They do not live in the constant shadow of their parent, even if Odalia has had a large impact on them.

I focus on pre-S2 like this for a reason. You can retcon all you want BUT Odalia had to stand on what was setup before her arrival. Anything afterwards is damage control for fuck ups they made. Even then, many of their retcons actually make elements of this worse as Odalia was able to internalize her dream of Amity being in the EC so severely that just the idea of ANY threat to that was able to drive Amity to madness (Teenage Abomination) or close to the brink of tears (Covention). This further implies a great deal of influence over Amity and that her lessons left deep scars on her, to the point where Amity stopped distinguishing between her mother's desires and her own.

That doesn't FUNCTION with S2.

Odalia in S2 leans in ENTIRELY into the idea that she'd straight up murder one of her own children if they stepped out of line too far. She literally was willing to show how efficiently her HOME DEFENSE robot, which you would think would be used to protect YOUR KIDS, can murder a child in order to hurt Amity and prove her dominance. The twins, who are unrepentant in their schemes outside of Amity almost getting killed, do fear repercussions from Odalia. Odalia hates literally anything that makes them step out of line with the image she desires for her family, thus trying to dye Amity's hair. She is a monster, through and through.

A monster that Amity tells to go fuck herself and suffer ZERO ramifications from. If the show were as brave as people claim, that would have led to Amity being DISOWNED because why would Odalia continue to accept what is clearly an abject failure of ideals at this point? Yes, Alador theoretically pushes the idea of how Amity might be getting stronger based on this but why would she actually believe that? And even then, is a potential coven head worth it if it gives her no power back because they won't listen to her? Because they aren't profitable and loyal to her anymore? Even without the retcons to Alador, there's a real case that just in her first appearance, it's a cop out. Post Alador's retcons where Odalia doesn't care about him and doesn't listen to him, where she takes a single act of betrayal as a reason to accuse him of wanting to break off their partnership, all of this only becomes worse.

And all of this comes back around to crack Amity's character. That arc everyone praises from S1? Now it makes no sense because Amity's influences make no sense. What she rebels against is made trivial but also incomprehensible because there SHOULD have been consequences and she should have MUCH more scared of those consequences. Instead, it comes incredibly easy and naturally to her to break her bonds and be a good person with the 'right' friends now. This is compounded by how little anyone ever calls out her behavior or how almost all of the time she may spend being introspective is off screen. We don't get to see the ideals she holds be properly challenged besides... Luz existing and Understanding Willow. Meanwhile, HER MOTHER is like THIS. Where those ideals would be constantly reinforced and the consequences for breaking those ideals would be SEVERE.

So, to loop back around: Did Odalia need more depth? Yes. Or she had to have mattered much, MUCH less to Amity.

======+++++======

As a note, this is one of those big examples to me for how TOH fans struggle to actually bring the show together for their analysis rather than cherry picking examples or using single episodes. Anyone who tries to claim Odalia and Amity's relationship makes sense is ignoring a LOT of elements that intrinsically tied to one another and how those elements cascade upon each other. Complex storytelling is like this where one creative choice creates a knock on effect. Making characters all be tied between each other somehow is one of the best examples of this but I feel like a lot of fans, for the sake of praising Amity's arc, only focus on Odalia and Amity like they are in a closed circuit and only for the specific parts they want to use in that circuit. That's not how this works.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#the owl house criticism #toh critical #toh #the owl house #amity blight #odalia blight

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