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#the problem with being a linguist

snarp · 7 months

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The weird ways 15-to-25-year-old fiction writers use the English language because they don't read OEL books; they learn plot/scene structure from episodic serial narratives that are drawn out for years (usually not purely text-based) and/or require digging through auxiliary materials to piece together important details; learn words and phrases from video content without seeing how they're spelled/formatted in text......... This Will Have Consequences.

#it's gotten much harder to identify who is and is not a 'native english speaker' because kids in non-anglophone countries spend #so much time engaging with english-language stuff online and passing their own permutations on phrases/words on to the kids who #speak english to the people around them offline #so i'm seeing sentence structure that i used to associate specifically with japanese/korean esl people from like. racist kids in texas #which is fine. 'who give a shit.' as they say #but i feel 900 years old when i try to read fanfic for stuff that's popular among the Youths #it's unavoidable and not a problem in itself but i worry that a lot of fucked-up arguments are being sparked by #rapid-linguistic-drift-induced misunderstandings

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jubileebloom · 1 year

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5.5 years ago MLP FiM brought back Starswirl the Bearded and now I'm losing my goddamn mind over linguistics

First of all. Five and a half years. Really??? It's been that long???? God I feel really old, and I can't even legally drink round these parts yet. Ponies do things to the brain.

Anyway. On to me ranting about this here unicorn wizard and the weirdness of language instead of doing something useful like studying for finals. He's not even the sole pony to blame for my current descent into madness but he was probably the main catalyst behind it.

I don't know what they did with Starswirl's show appearance that made me drawn to him so immediately—choice of voice actor? design? demeanor? sheer dark magic? who knows—but anyone who knows anything at all about me knows that I've had an on-and-off obsession with this man. It's inescapable. He fundamentally rewired some of my neural connections. Like yes he's a jerk to Twilight and everyone else but that was him at his most stressed and probably at his lowest point because Twilight had just dragged him back to life after he had given himself up to be practically dead to contain the highly dangerous threat that Twilight had just brought back to Equestria but I'm going to keep the psychology lecture to myself for now. I have more important unimportant things to get to.

So. I'm obsessed with Starswirl. And as people sometimes do when they're obsessed with a character, especially one who doesn't come with a lot of canon backstory, they come up with headcanons. And in this MLP managed to do something to me that had never truly been done before to this scale: get me interested in history. Not real history, of course. That would have to wait until later. But the history of Equestria was made keenly relevant, with a new cast of characters ripped right out of the deep past and dropped into the present. We already had Luna and Celestia, of course, but I was more than happy to entertain myself just imagining up sisterly shenanigans rather than dragging myself through a made-up history lecture. I had wondered about their past, but nothing I ever read up about or thought up myself really called to me. Not like the Pillars did.

To make a very long story short, Starswirl ended up doing the thing that characters I like sometimes do. Sometimes I make up headcanons about characters. Other times, it seems that I'll just be thinking about them one day, and suddenly the character in question appears in my mind, but now they have stories, stories that have nothing to do with canon but that they have suddenly brought to me and are now explaining to me in great detail. It's not a conscious choice to write backstories for these characters; they come to live in my subconscious already fairly fleshed out, leaving me to only make a few edits here and there. And now this shortened long story is already getting longer than I wanted, so I will limit myself to only one more sentence. Starswirl was the kind of character who seemed to suddenly come to me with a lot of headcanon backstory, and one piece of that was that my mind seemed to have decided on a whim that he should be fluent in some sort of almost-dead ancient unicorn language.

By this point the title should hopefully be slightly less confusing.

What a marvelous idea, I thought! But ancient, almost-dead unicorn languages are hard to come by these days. So if I wanted to give more weight to this idea, on the off chance I wanted to write a fanfic about it later or something, I'd have to make one myself.

So now I'm dipping my toes into the world of conlangs (constructed languages). In order to invent this language (Archorn, I'm thinking of calling it) I'm going to probably want to find real-life languages to reference in its creation. And if the common language they speak in the show (I'm just calling it Common for simplicity's sake) is similar to English, and if I'm assuming this Archorn language I'm inventing is an ancestor of the common language much like English has roots in many other languages, then I should draw parallels between Archorn and some of the languages that influenced English. Makes sense, right?

Except now I have to figure out what role Archorn would play in influencing Common before I can truly construct it. Or at least, that's what it feels like to me. In reality, I do not have to be doing any of this, I am merely driven to by the demons (hyperfixations) that possess me (are more appealing than my college coursework).

This also leads me to be curious about what other languages might have been used among pegasi or earth ponies. And now I feel like I have to make those up too. I'm gonna be here a while, and that's before I even get into other non-pony species who may have also contributed to the common tongue, and also just having non-pony languages for the sheer sake of having those languages.

So here I am, hours deep into several rabbit holes about linguistics, pushing back my starting line further and further away while I find more prerequisites that I have to fulfill before I feel like I can actually go and make something to quell the thirst for fictitious knowledge in my soul.

Oh, all that wasn't even mentioning that Shadow Play also tried to introduce some bits of Old Ponish. Go figure.

But anyway. Now I have So Many Thoughts and nothing that I can possibly do with them. Because in order to invent one language I feel like I have to invent all of them to figure out the role that they all play. And before I do that I'd need to extensively map out the cultures and politics of Equestria and beyond over time to see what forces shaped language development. Sigh. Why do I get myself into these things.

Thinking about the languages of other creatures is really cool though. I have to imagine beak-specific sounds or chirps/whistles would play some sort of role in griffon and hippogriff native languages, and hippogriffs turning to seaponies would come with some changes to the language to work around their new extra wet environment. Yaks definitely seem to speak the common tongue in ways that more resemble the structure of their native language. This is all just speculation on my end, but it actually makes a lot of sense that yak language would have a smaller vocabulary, or at least use less words at once while speaking, and generally be spoken louder. I'd imagine in their far north environment, it would be important to get information across to other yaks quickly and effectively, and especially if they're shouting over snowstorms and trying to not freeze their tongues they'd favor shorter sentences and simpler, more direct ways of saying things. It also makes sense that Yona refers to herself by her name while speaking instead of first-person pronouns, again signaling a need for high clarity while communication. If you're stuck in a blizzard and you can't see very far in front of your own face, you don't have time to sit there and try to puzzle out who you're talking to when you're shouting at each other to try to figure out where you are. You all use your own names so every yak can keep track of each other and know who's who at any point.

Anyway. It's way past midnight where I am, I have about fifty gazillion assignments I need to somehow finish tomorrow, and I'm cutting off my rant here for the night. If you read all this, props to you I guess?

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hoodieimp · 2 years

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Misc. OC thought of the day:

Dizzy would genuinely enjoy math and be really good at it--it's just that no one's ever bothered to properly teach her. She came into existence with basically all of her background knowledge from her cartoon self, which included stuff like basic arithmetic (or at least addition and subtraction), but Joey's plans for her were solely based on being a performer and singing and dancing for people (plus he's not exactly the type to sit down and teach her)

That being said, if you sat Dizzy down with a bunch of those Mad Minute math worksheets and timed her, she'd absolutely love it. Challenge her! Get her to use her brain in a way she's not accustomed to! It's enrichment!

Or better yet, show her the Schoolhouse Rock series. Learning her times tables AND getting to sing along to a fun little song? Best of both worlds baby!

#Dizzy #my ocs #batim oc #dizzy writes #(that's not a confusing tag At All lmao)#as someone who was temporarily obsessed with a single very specific type of math problem back in elementary school #(I genuinely can't remember exactly what it was but? something to do with trying to determine an unknown variable assigned to a letter?)#(like Very Very basic pre-algebra kind of??? idk)#and would take my notes out at recess and write and solve my own math problems *for fun*#yes this is lowkey me projecting lmao #also the Schoolhouse Rock thing #I fucking LOVED that series as a kid #we have (had?) the whole collection on DVD #and to this day the Multiplication series is what got me to remember my times tables #by being able to sing them to the tune #also the Grammar series was where I first learned abt categories of words #which has come in surprisingly handy now that I've been taking Linguistics #but yeah anyways. Dizzy can be good at math as a treat #leaning more into the 'High Int Low Wis' characterization I guess hdjsbdhd #EDIT: FACTORING. I'M 90% SURE IT WAS FACTORING #Dizzy Dee

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kravicle · 1 day

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me: i dont wanna do a masters just yet i want to work i wanna earn money

also me: what if i went into sociolinguistics and specifically cognitive sociolinguistics and did a masters thesis on how neurodivergent "culture" and cognitive processing affects linguistics not from physical limitations (logopaedic perspective) but from a cultural perspective

#krav speaks #the problem is. that i want to do everything #i love interpreting i love localisation i love subtitling and captioning i love linguistics i love literary studies ahhhhh #human beings talking? VERY fun very good

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reidmotif · 8 months

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"Technically" Not A Student

Summary: Reader is Alex Blake’s TA, and after a guest lecture, Spencer seems to take a liking to her .

Prompt:You’re Alex Blake’s TA when a Dr. Reid comes to guest lecture. Things get heated quickly when you're alone.

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader

Category: Smut

Content Warning: Reader POV, guestlecturer!Spencer , age gap (roughly 10 years), car sex, heavy making out, unprotected sex, slight female masturbation, Spencer is smart and that's HOT, heavy sexual tension

Word Count: 5.1k

Being asked to be Alex Blake’s TA was the opportunity of a lifetime, and when it was presented to me as a first-year graduate student at Georgetown, I took it eagerly and never looked back.

She had personally approached me after I’d finished a semester in her forensic linguistics class as a freshman, and commended me on my dedication to the material and my general work ethic, and then inquired if I’d ever consider filling out an application as her teaching assistant starting the next semester.

I immediately agreed. It was a no-brainer. Blake was a seasoned professional in the career field I wished to enter, not to mention she’d been one of the best professors I’d had whilst taking classes at Georgetown. Knowing I’d be working so closely with her absolutely thrilled me. It provided opportunities I'd have never gotten otherwise.

For example, getting to sit in on the class the famed Spencer Reid would be lecturing on.

She usually kept me quite busy, having me develop assignments and quizzes for her class when she had other responsibilities to attend to. I’d heard horror stories from other TA’s in which their supervisors would delegate ninety-nine percent of the work to their juniors, having them essentially teach the class for minimal recognition or pay. Blake wasn’t like that, and I was thankful. This time around though, she had very different instructions for me.

“You don’t need to prepare any material this time around.” Blake explained to me, and I nodded, listening diligently. “I’d just like you to sit in, and possibly take notes, as you see fit.” She added, and I flashed a polite smile, nodding.

“No problem whatsoever. I’ll sit in the back so as to not bother any students as I do.” I replied, offering her as much convenience as I could within my actions.

Secretly, I did want to catch more than a glimpse from the back of the room. I wanted to experience the esteemed colleague Blake had often spoken of with incredible fondness. I was aware he was slightly older than I was, and a bit socially inept from the way she described him in his stories, but I was also aware the man was a goddamn genius. She’d describe in precision the way Reid would pick up on patterns and leads faster than anyone else on the team, and his immense knowledge in multiple fields beyond criminal profiling. When she’d told me he had three pHDs, I had to hold back a gasp. I hadn’t even started my own doctorate, but the idea only exhausted me- and he had three?! Color me impressed.

Blake, being as brilliant as she did, could sense the hidden enthusiasm in my eyes in meeting this man.

“Honestly, I’d rather you sit in the front. If you’re taking notes for any student unable to attend, it’s more imperative that you know the contents of the lecture, rather than anyone else.” She said, smiling kindly.

“That’s absolutely alright with me.” I say, even quicker than before, nodding, thoughtfully. In reality, the only thing I was thinking about was how close I’d be near the man. I had no idea what he looked like, what he sounded like, but something about him made my stomach flutter.

“I’m sure Dr. Reid would be interested in meeting you, as well. He takes special interest in anyone pursuing our line of work.” Blake added. She didn’t mean for it to happen, but the words made my cheeks light up with a hint of embarrassment.

I don’t know why, but he intimidated the hell out of me. The idea of him taking interest in a conversation with me made my heart beat slightly faster, and I nodded. I tried to convince myself that my nerves came from a purely professional standpoint, but regardless of my intentions, I was absolutely exhilarated by our imminent meeting.

While I knew there'd be initial awkwardness when I'd meet him, given my idolization of the man, I didn’t account for how terrible it’d actually be when I realized how fucking attractive he was. It was almost unfair. I was already tripping over the words I planned on saying in my head, and now he looked like that?

It was cruel.

The soft, doe eyes paired with sharp cheekbones. The slope of his nose, and the mess of brown curls atop his head. Every word out of his mouth was made even prettier by the soft curve and pinkness of his lips, and I found myself wanting to lunge over the table and kiss the hell out of him.

Needless to say, not the right thoughts to have about your professor’s (older) coworker.

While I was initially going to introduce myself to Dr. Reid before his lecture, hopefully establishing myself as a serious individual regarding my studies and eventual career, I shied away, opting for Blake to introduce me instead, nodding politely when he made eye contact with me, exchanging a quiet “hello” and taking my seat in the front.

That was it. And probably how it should be, considering I genuinely couldn’t think straight around him. Students began filtering in, and I took my spot at the front of the room, crossing my legs and beginning to outline his lecture as he began to speak.

He was a brilliant lecturer, and it was honestly criminal he didn’t do this for a living. He gesticulated wildly throughout the whole of it, but every word of his was punctuated with a genuine passion that even some of the best professors on campus lacked. I did my best to diligently keep up with every point he brought up, but with how fast he spoke, it was difficult. Still, an effort was made.

If that wasn’t enough to deal with, I swear the man kept making eye contact with me for the duration of his lecture. At first I believed I was imagining it, that his eyes kept drifting to mine by coincidence, but by the third time, I’d realized that everytime my eyes left his figure to scribble something, I’d look up to see his dark eyes boring into my soul, almost as if he was trying to solve me with a glance. It was intense and made my stomach turn in a way which wasn’t entirely unpleasurable, but I forced myself to remain professional.

Blake did not need to see me absolutely lusting after her coworker, even if he was utterly fit.

Anyway, he was probably only making eye contact considering I was in the front, and probably in an optimal spot for his eyes to focus on whilst addressing the whole of the class. Still, the way his gaze was trained on mine, reaching the deepest parts of my soul didn’t help the growing heat between my legs.

I forced myself to focus on the board, my notes, anything but those godforsaken eyes for the rest of the lecture. Anytime we made eye contact afterwards, I’d quickly look down, like I’d been caught doing something terrible.

Was anyone else seeing this? Was I insane and made delusional by my unexpected attraction to this man? Was he seriously making me wet just by looking at me?

Yes.

Sooner than anyone wanted, the lecture period had completed and Dr. Reid was finishing up. The students were absolutely enamored, especially the girls, as expected. Of course it wouldn’t be just me who’d noticed that in addition to being accomplished in his intelligence, he was also ridiculously easy on the eyes.

Blake stood in the corner, watching her students vacate the space, while some held back to talk to Dr. Reid as he packed his things. He seemed a bit shy at all the attention, but didn’t hesitate in explaining concepts to seemingly eager students, giving them all a soft, shy smile.

God help me, he was adorable. How was I falling for a man I’d never even spoken a word to?

I’d never left the classroom before Blake did, so as she stayed, I did as well, until the three of us were the only ones left in the room. Blake smiled, walking up to Dr. Reid with her hands in her pocket.

“You worked up quite the fanbase, Reid.” Blake said, a little playful.

Reid replied somewhat bashfully. ��You have a great bunch of students.” He flashed a small smile at her as they spoke, still packing up his things.

The dynamic between my superior and the man was obviously sweet. They almost looked familial, which made sense. Blake had commented here and there that she managed to spend more time with the BAU with her actual family. I’m sure the latter was the same for Spencer. He probably had a doting girlfriend at home, ready to welcome him in her arms and I mentally kicked myself again for being so attracted to him.

He was nearly ten years older, for god’s sake! Enough! I screamed at myself.

I was brought out quite suddenly from my thoughts when Blake spoke in my direction. “This is (Y/N), my teaching assistant.” Reid came in my direction as I got up and approached him, offering a hand to me. “I’m Dr. Spencer Reid. Blake told me who you were, but we weren’t properly introduced.”

I gave a firm shake to his hand, which I noticed was calloused and smooth at the same time. God, even his hands were pretty. He had long, slender fingers with short-kept nails. They were veiny, and looked strong. I couldn’t help but imagine what they’d feel like inside of me, buried in the heat of my core as I begged him for more.. more..

I forced the thought out of my head, only nodding again at the handsome man. “Nice to meet you, Dr. Reid.” I say, forcing myself to be professional.

Stop thinking about fucking him!

“Spencer works just fine.” He says, imparting a kind smile that nearly made my knees weak. Did he have any idea the embarrassing effect he was having on me?

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Blake looking at the two of us with a bit of a strange expression on her face. I let go of his hand and took a step back. Oh god. Could she tell? If she could, she said nothing. She gave us both a kind smile, before grabbing her own things.

“(Y/N)?” She called out, starting to walk to the door. “Mind locking up for me tonight?” She said, already throwing her keys to me.

“That’s fine by me.” I say, grabbing her keys mid-air. I was used to this. Blake often wanted to leave a bit quicker than I did, and I was more than happy to assist in any way possible. What I didn’t realize, was that this left me and Spencer in the room alone, something I wanted to avoid, considering how fucking awkward this man was rendering me with so much as a glance at me.

I heard Blake leave, and as she quietly closed the door behind her, I leaned against a desk, keeping my eyes down as Spencer continued to pack his own things. I tried to not let my gaze drift to him, as I waited for him to finish up.

I let my thoughts wander to the lecture, and couldn’t shake the feeling he’d evoked in me when he looked at me like that. This was honestly ridiculous. The man had barely spoken ten words to me, and here I was, absolutely mooning over him. It was a new low for me, but in my defense being a graduate student meant I didn’t have much time to get my .. needs fulfilled.

“That’s why” I convinced myself. I just hadn’t gotten laid in a really long time. Nothing more, nothing less.

“So, you’re a criminology student?” Spencer says, suddenly, breaking me out of my trance.

I looked up, nodding. I responded on pure habit and instinct. ‘Yes, I’m in the process of getting my Masters in Criminology.” I said, nearly robotic.

“That must be interesting.” Spencer replied, flashing me a sweet smile that caused an entirely new slew of butterflies to erupt in my stomach. “I never studied criminology specifically, but the classes I took interested me.”

“Blake told me you had three pHDs.” I acknowledged, trying to return his smile, but in all honesty, I probably looked like an idiot. I was nervous as hell, and hoped he couldn’t tell. It wasn’t my fault. He was awe-causing. A sight to behold, if you will, in intelligence and appearance.

He laughed good naturedly, “Yeah. Three.” He must’ve noticed the stars in my eyes, because he continues. “As well as a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology and Sociology. And I’m working on another in Philosophy.” He finishes with a smug, boyish type of smile.

What was previously stars in my eyes, was now full blown shock all over my face. “Wow, Spencer.” I said, a little dumb-struck. “That’s.. a lot.” I add, a little stupidly, giving him a little laugh.

He sweetly scratched his neck, revealing his self-consciousness. “Yeah? You think?” He says, a small smirk in his voice, and I laughed again. “You think I should stop after Philosophy?”

“Totally. Save some knowledge for us.” I teased. It was comfortable. He was surprisingly easy to get used to. He was affable, despite how daunting his knowledge was.

“Hey, you try graduating before you’re a teenager.” He defends himself, playfully. “Not much to do, really.”

I laugh. “I don’t know.” I say, throwing my hands up a little. “Play ball? Run around?” I joke, and he makes a face at that, scrunching up his nose.

“Not my thing.” He replies, smoothly, and I laugh.

“Alright, fine. Keep your degrees doctor man.” And he laughs at my joke. Like, a real laugh. I didn’t even find my own rhetoric particularly humorous, but knowing that I’d gotten him to react like that made my cheeks glow.

He finished packing the last of his things and slung his satchel bag over himself, starting to walk over to the door. I made sure to gather all my things, and walked to the door with him. He held it open for me, and I nodded my head in thanks, and he let it shut behind us. I turned around to lock it, using Blake’s keys and placing them in my bag securely, before looking at him.

“Well, Spencer. It was nice meeting you, thank you for the lecture it was-” I start, but he interrupts me.

“Can I walk you to your car?” He interjected, looking a little shy as he did. I smiled a little confusedly, wondering why he’d want to do so, but I gave him my answer, nonetheless.

“I don’t have a car. I usually take the bus back to my apartment.” I explained, smiling softly.

“The bus?” He says, quirking his mouth to the side. “Isn’t it a bit late for that?” He replies, a hint of concern in his voice.

I gave a little sigh, “I mean, it’s fine.” I say, trying to laugh a little. “I’ve done it before.” I add, attempting to ease the worry out of his voice. “It’s not that late.” I say, but he simply shakes his head.

“No way.” He says, still adamant on this. “I.. I can drive you home, if you’d like?” He says, his words going slightly on the higher pitch as he rolled out his proposal, and I gave a small grin at that.

“Really? If it’s a hassle I can seriously just take the bus. I wouldn’t want you to keep anyone waiting at home or-”

He interjects again. “No hassle. I promise. I want to.” He pauses, before adding, “No one at home. You’re probably going to be the last person I see today.” He seems to blush at his final admission, and my eyes widen in interest. No girlfriend? Score.

“Alright, Spencer.” I say, smiling again. “Lead the way.”

He led me to his car, an old-fashioned Volvo and I couldn’t help myself from gawking at it.

“God, you have a cool car too? Is there anything about you that isn’t interesting?” I say, aware I was probably stroking his ego a bit, but honestly I wanted to. The man was just so damn intriguing, and every new bit of information I learned about him only made me want to unravel the whole of him. To truly know him, in and out.

He laughed, using his keys to manually unlock the door. “Oh, trust me. I’m plenty boring. The car is probably my only saving grace.” He joked, and I laughed again as I got into the car.

“Oh, I highly doubt that, but if you say so.” I say, sweetly, and adding a light tone of flirtatiousness in my tone. He seems to blush at this again, and I begin to think about the events of day. The stares in class, the perpetual rosy tint on his cheeks that had been there since we began our conversation, the way he joked and laughed at my (admittedly, unfunny) jokes.

Oh god. Did he like me?

Only one way to find out.

As Spencer got in the car and began driving onto the main road, I looked at him, trying to put on my best, innocent smile. “So, you said you’re not going home to anyone?” I say, a softness to my tone, but an undeniable hunger in it as well.

“Uh.” He responds, that damned blush coming on, strong. “Yes.” He replies, nodding as he keeps his eyes on the road.

“So, you don’t have a girlfriend?” I ask, a bit forwardly.

Now he’s really blushing, stuttering a bit. “Oh, no. No girlfriend. Not much time, given the BAU and our schedule.” He said, almost clinically, and I nodded.

“I mean, Blake has a husband.” I point out, a little smugly.

“I guess.” He says, sighing a bit. “But, you know.” He says. He vaguely gestures to himself, and I look at him a little confused, tilting my head at him.

“Spencer, I have no idea what you’re trying to say.” I say, with a little giggle. “But trust me, you’re absolutely gorgeous.” I continue, before I can stop myself.

He looks at me, giving me a soft smirk, and a raise of his eyebrows. He didn’t look uncomfortable, and honestly looked just as thrilled as I did, and I knew that this night had a good chance of going the way I wanted it too.

“Ah, you’re sweet.” Spencer replies, “But no. I just mean, I’m.. me. You know?” He says, trying to explain his (non-existent) shortcomings, but I just shake my head.

“You don’t give yourself much credit, you know?” I attempt to say with that amorous tone from before, but it was more overcome with genuine respect and admiration. “You’re smart, funny and nice to be around, I mean.” I pause. “Did you not see the absolute crowd of girls around you after the lecture? Trust me, Spencer. I bet you’re more than easy to be with, even easier to like.” The words rush out of me, and I watch him tentatively for his reaction to my words.

Instead of the sweet side smile he’d been offering me all night, he finally looked at me. The car had come to a stop at a red light, and his face was dangerously sexy as it was illuminated by the colored glow around us.

“And what do you think?” Spencer says, in a low tone, making direct eye contact with me.

I feel my stomach turn at the sudden directness in his words, his gaze nearly devouring me whole. I felt my mouth go dry and I swallow, trying to keep my tone steady.

“What do you mean?” I ask, my voice having a slight shake to it.

“I mean, what do you think about me? Do you.. like me?” He says, licking his lips slightly, and the action causes the previous heat between my legs to come by in full force.

“Oh, I mean.” I say, my previous confidence dissipating in an instant. “Well, yes, Dr. Reid. Everyone liked you today.” I say, trying to give more of a conservative answer now.

The man had a way of making me feel totally comfortable around him, and then flipping the switches, rendering me dumb and stuttering. Like I was now.

“Oh, so I’m Doctor Reid now.” He says, clicking his tongue and saying the words with an air of lighthearted teasing, but I only bit my lip, hurriedly trying to explain myself.

“I mean, it's your title.” I say, quickly, trying to justify myself. “I mean, you said it yourself- three pHDs. It’d be pretty shitty to just discard the years taken to achieve that. Um. Well. You’re a genius so probably not as long, but still! Calling you doctor is a sign of respect for your accomplishments and-”

“You're cute.” He interrupts, and I look back at him to see his eyes back on the road, a cocky smile plastered on his face.

The light around us turned green, and he started the car. I picked at my nails slightly, trying not to display any more signs of nervousness around him. I wanted to do something with him, at least, and that couldn't happen if I was a bumbling mess.

We drove in relative silence for the next few minutes, as I tried to gather my thoughts and possibly continue what we’d been building up to these past few hours, but a quick glance at the windows and the road we were on caused me to furrow my brows.

“Oh, this isn’t the way to my apartment.” I remark absentmindedly, looking at the window beside me, then in front. “I live near the train station, off east?” I offer, expecting him to fully make a turn back towards the direction I’d prompted him towards, but he didn’t even flinch, continuing on the more secluded road we’d entered.

“I know.” He said, glancing at me once more, actually applying more pressure to the gas pedal, causing us to go faster down the terrain.

Okay, fuck. He was an FBI agent, so I didn’t have to worry about him murdering me, right? Wait, no, that’s stupid. He could probably get away with it. No! He’s Blake’s friend. Her coworker. For the goddamn FBI. He wouldn’t murder me. What the fuck was going on?

I watched as Spencer pulled off to the side of the road, darkness surrounding us entirely. There weren't any other cars around, and it was silent in the car before I bit my lip, and started to speak.

“Did I.. offend you?” I ask, cautiously. No reply. I try again. “Why did we stop?” I add, trying to test the waters with him to see what he was thinking at that moment.

“I thought I could wait before we got to your place, but I need to know now.” He replied, a sudden urgency in his voice. He turned towards me, watching me with a dark, intense gaze, similar to the one he'd given me in class that day. “Do you want me? Am I reading this wrong with you? Because if I am, we can completely forget it and I can drop you home but (Y/N)..�� He paused. He made direct eye contact with me and once again I found myself wanting to swim in those dark eyes of his. “I want you.” He said, his voice low and raspy.

I didn't give it much thought as I gave into my urges and surged towards his lips the best I could in the car. He responded immediately, bringing me closer with his hands and placing them on either side of my face, moving his lips against mine in a perfected rhythm. I used my fingers to quickly undo my belt, before climbing over the console to sit in his lap, getting closer without our lips disconnected once. He understood my actions and intentions immediately, pulling the seat back so I could rest more comfortably in his lap as we continued to kiss.

I knotted my hands in his hair, giving an experimental tug which elicited a low moan from his mouth. I grinned against his lips and his hands moved from my face to his hips, bringing my clothed core to rest right against his growing bulge, which I immediately moved against. He let out a sharp breath as I did and broke the kiss.

“Oh god. I’m sorry.” He said, breathlessly, hands on my hips. “I don’t know what came over me and-”

He looked almost frantic, and incredibly guilty, so I quickly leaned in for a peck, stopping him mid sentence. I brought my hands to his shoulders to rub them soothingly, and he seemed to relax in my touch.

“Spencer, calm down.” I say, nearly purring. “I want this.” I continue, rubbing patterns into his arms now. “Please.”

“You’re Blake’s student.” He murmurs, using one of his hands to run through already messy brown curls. “What am I doing?” He says, almost to himself, looking ready to stop our tryst.

I realize he was attempting to backtrack from this, and before he could continue his train of thought, I quickly leaned in from my position on his lap to start kissing his neck, trailing wet hot kisses down the column before whispering. “I’m not her student.”

He pulls away to look at me, biting his lip. “What?”

“I was her student last semester. I’m her teaching assistant now.” I smirk a little, licking my lips. “Technically not a student of hers.”

He seemed to take in my words for a moment, and then something in him shifted, and he lunged at me again, kissing me with even more ferocity. He absolutely devoured me, his hands everywhere at this point. Caressing my sides, in my hair, on the small of my back. He brought me closer to him in any way he could, pressing our bodies against each other in a frenzied manner that caused the wetness between my legs to increase tenfold.

“Wanted you.. as soon as I saw you.” He murmurs against my lips as we caught our breath in between kisses. “Knew it was wrong but..”

I nodded. I understood. I was the same.

“Fuck.” I moaned, as I felt the bulge resting below me get even harder. “Spencer, please. Don’t make me wait.”

“Impatient.” He remarked, smirking, now beginning his own line of kisses down my neck, making me moan in pleasure.

“Please.” I breathed out, my words being reduced to a squeak as he bit my neck gently, and my eyes fluttered shut. I was melting right in his damn hands, just like he wanted.

His hands started to work at the buttons on my jeans, and I sighed in relief, lifting up my hips to allow them to be tugged off, leaving me in my underwear. His slender fingers traced the seam, leaving me shuddering with pleasure for the man in front of me. I tried once more, breathlessly murmuring at him.

“Please. Please.”

“Use your words, baby.” He whispered, a devilish smirk on his face. I was too far-gone to care about what I looked like. I needed him so badly.

“I need you to fuck me, now.” I say, clearer. “I need it, Spencer.”

Something about me using his name, nearly moaning for the man when he’d barely touched me stirred something in him, and he started to undo his own slacks, freeing his cock from the confines of his briefs. I watched in fascination as it sprung out, and took in a sharp breath of air. I licked my lips before making eye contact with him, begging for us to get on with it at this point. He nodded, understanding my desperation and I smiled dumbly, beginning to lift my hips. He guided his cock to my heat and placed his free hand on the small of my back, slowly guiding me down his member.

I moaned softly as I felt him enter me, providing me with the most delicious stretch. I threw my head back in pleasure as he brought both his hands to my hips urging me down.

“That’s it. God, fuck. You feel so good.” He moaned, which only made me want to take more of him. I lowered myself down a bit faster, and he released a heavy groan as his hips met mine. I whimpered slightly, his length filling me up perfectly. A thin sheen of sweat had gathered on my brow and I leaned my forehead, adjusting to his size.

“You good?” He breathed out, using his hand to brush a piece of hair that had stuck itself on my brow, and I nodded.

“Yeah, just.” I took a deep breath, before licking my lips, looking up before nodding.

I slowly lifted myself off, letting the head of his arousal nestle in me before I slammed back down, eliciting moans from both of us. He began to match my movements in tandem, thrusting up into me wildly. I held onto his shoulders, burying myself in his neck as we went faster. I could feel his tip hitting my cervix every time, causing me to cry out with pleasure every single time.

I felt my orgasm rapidly approach, and Spencer seemed to sense this as well, considering the involuntary clenches I was giving around his cock. He let his hand slip down to where our bodies met and rubbed tight, fast circles around my clit, encouraging my release.

“Come on, pretty girl. Come all over my cock. You can do it.” He breathed out, watching my every move with a hunger I'd never experienced before.

It took a few more thrusts from him, combined with the insistent fingers at my bundle of nerves before my thighs began shaking, and I let out a chorus of moans, most of them sounding like strangled versions of his name as I coated his cock in my wetness, spurring him on to go faster inside me, bucking into me like a man possessed.

He continued to jut into me wildly, until I felt him finish inside me, coating my walls with his release. He breathed shakily, holding me close to him as I slumped over his shoulder, my chest heaving up and down as I came down from the intensity of the previous moment.

He affectionately removed me from his shoulder, pressing a soft kiss to my lips, the tenderness and gentleness in his actions contrary to what we had just done. I pulled back with a dazed smile, taking in how pretty he looked.

“If it’s alright, I’d love to take you out for coffee sometime.” He said, still a bit breathless, and a shy smile appeared on his face.

I giggled. He was literally still inside me, and was asking me out on a date with a boyish nervousness that made him even harder to resist.

“For you Dr Reid? Anything.”

ahh! writing this was a beast, and i imagined it to be longer but i got what i wanted in less words haha. i hope you guys liked this. any reblogs, comments, likes are so so appreciated i know it sounds totally stupid, but your guys' support means a lot lot lot!! thank you!!! <3

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid self insert #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds self insert #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #smut #spencer reid prompt #writing prompt

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harunayuuka2060 · 7 months

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Crowley: What's going on? Granny didn't visit me this morning in my office...

Professor Crewel: She must be busy.

Crowley: That's the problem, Professor Crewel! Granny has never missed a day! I'm her precious son after all!

Professor Crewel: ...

Professor Crewel: And all the students are her precious grandchildren. She has other things to do. You know that.

Crowley: But my freshly-baked pie—

"Oh dear. I didn't mean to be late. *soft chuckles*

Crowley and Professor Crewel: *both looking at the young and beautiful woman who entered their office*

Grandma MC: *has turned back to her youthful age of 25*

Grandma MC: *sets down the freshly-baked pie on Crowley's desk* I'll get you some refreshments. *smiles at him and leaves the room*

Crowley and Professor Crewel: ...

Crowley: That lady just now...

Professor Crewel: That's Granny.

Crowley: ...

Professor Crewel: ...

*immediately runs after her*

Ruggie: *clinging onto Granny's arm* How does it feel to be young again, Granny?

Grandma MC: I feel great. *chuckles* I have visited all the dorms without running out of breath.

Ruggie: Geez, Gran. You should do other things, not just visiting us from day to day.

Grandma MC: Oh. But it is my greatest joy to see you having classes.

Grandma MC: You were quite impressive in the animal linguistic class earlier.

Ruggie: Shyeheehee! Granny! You're making me blush!

Ace, Deuce, Epel, and Grim: *who looks annoyed*

Ortho: I'm sensing jealousy.

Ace: He's getting all the attention!

Deuce: *nods in agreement*

Epel: She's still our Granny. And with the way Ruggie-senpai is acting, it feels like he wants himself to only be her grandson.

Ortho: Well... Wasn't he the original favorite?

Grim: Excuse me? I'm the favorite! Mryah!

Floyd: *suddenly arrives in his broom and snatches Granny*

Ruggie: Wha— Hey!

Floyd: Granny~!

Grandma MC: *was startled for a second, then smiled* Are you skipping class today, son?

Floyd: P.E. is boring. I would rather spend time with you, Granny~.

Grandma MC: *chuckles*

Ruggie: *runs after them* Hey, Floyd! That's foul!

Ace: Yeah! It's supposed to be our turn! Hey!

Grim: GRANNY! MRYAH!!!

Deuce: When did we start snatching Granny out of nowhere?

Epel: I don't know...

Crowley: *seems exhausted from trying to locate her*

Grandma MC: What happened, son? Are you alright?

Crowley: Yes, Granny...

Grandma MC: ...

Grandma MC: You can rest your head here on my shoulder.

Crowley: Thank you, Granny. *leans to her and rests his head on her shoulder*

Crowley: ...

Crowley: Granny.

Grandma MC: Yes?

Crowley: I feel like a small child next to you.

Grandma MC: *chuckles* Well, you are my son.

Crowley: *squeals*

Leona: Why are we even banned from seeing Granny for a week?

Vil: You have uselessly fought on whose country she's going to spend a vacation in.

Malleus: We all know they would rather be in Briar Valley.

Idia: Um... That's a pretty boring place.

Malleus: Did you say something, Shroud?

Idia: No. I mean. Yeah. It's quite breezy there.

Azul: We should design an itinerary.

Kalim: Yes! Scalding Sands will be our first stop!

Jamil: Kalim, you're not helping.

Riddle: Queendom of Roses. I honestly think it would suit Granny and I can introduce her to my mother.

The housewardens: ...

Jamil: Let's cross out Queendom of Roses.

Riddle: What?!

Trey: Haha... Yes. That's for the best.

Vil: However, knowing Granny, she would probably pay a visit there anyway.

Jamil: Right... *double crosses out the Queendom of Roses*

Riddle: *frowns even more*

Kalim: Um.

Grandma MC: *gently caressing the Sundrop Flower*

Grandma MC: *seems to be talking to the flower*

Grandma MC: You're being too generous. I'm already satisfied with this. *smiles*

Grandma MC: Spending time with my grandchildren has been so much fun.

Grandma MC: And I'm sure it will be as well for the next six years.

#twisted wonderland #twst grandma mc #twst crowley #twst crewel #twst grim #twst nrc boys

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jimmy-dipthong · 5 months

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Fake-tanuki soup or Fake tanuki-soup?

連濁（れんだく; en: rendaku）is a phonological rule in japanese that makes the first voiceless consonant of a word change into a voiced consonant when used in a compound word. For example, おり＋かみ → おりがみ (ori + kami → origami) ("fold" + "paper" → "paperfolding") - the /k/ sound in かみ becomes a /g/ sound (which is the voiced version of a /k/ sound) by adding a voicing mark -> が.

What’s interesting about 連濁 is that native speakers can use it subconsciously as a sort of “order of operations” system for unfamiliar words, like PEMDAS or BIDMAS in maths. A classic example of this is the にせたぬきじる problem[1]. Native speakers can immediately and with confidence tell the difference in meaning between two compound words they have never heard before, despite the only difference being the voicing of a single consonant. Take the three words 偽 (にせ, meaning “fake” or “imitation”), たぬき (tanuki, the Japanese racoon dog), and 汁 (しる, meaning “soup” or “broth”). They can be combined into the following compound words: にせたぬきじる and にせだぬきじる (note the voicing mark, or dakuten, on the latter). Keep in mind, these two words do not exist in ordinary japanese - they’ve been created as part of a linguistics experiment.

You might think the meaning would be ambiguous in those compound words: is it (imitation tanuki)+soup or imitation+(tanuki soup)? Let’s imagine we’re referring to the former. First, we combine にせ＋たぬき. There’s a rule that rendaku can’t occur if there’s already a voicing mark in the second component of the compound, but we’re safe here - たぬき has no voicing mark. Therefore, it becomes にせだぬき. Then, we combine にせだぬき＋しる. Again, しる has no voicing mark in it, so we’re safe to add it in, and we get にせだぬきじる.

Conversely, let’s say we were referring to fake “tanuki-soup”. First we combine たぬき＋しる. This combines safely to たぬきじる. Then we combine にせ＋たぬきじる. But wait, the second component does already have a voicing mark, on じ! So we can’t add one to た. Therefore we end up with にせたぬきじる.

That’s a lot of thinking and linguistic hoops to jump through to make up 2 words, but here’s the thing: Japanese native speakers who have never heard these words before can instinctively deduce the difference in meaning with startling accuracy. They correctly determine the meaning of にせだぬきじる as “a broth made from imitation tanuki” and にせたぬきじる as “a fake version of a dish called ‘tanuki soup’”. Even more surprising is the research findings of Shigeto Kawahara, which show that children as young as 9 years old can consistently deduce the difference as well[2]. I think this shows how incredibly powerful the subconscious mind is at learning linguistic rules, and how bad the conscious mind is at learning them!

#langblr #japanese #japanese language #language acquisition #language learning #language #linguistics #learning japanese #日本語 #jimmy blogthong

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discodeerdiary · 1 year

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Linguistic drift is an inevitable result of majority groups adopting language developed by minority groups. To give a silly example: when I first heard the phrase "theydies and gentlethems", it was legitimately funny. It was taking a traditional greeting that excludes nonbinary people and making it all about nonbinary people. What happened next is that the phrase spread and found its way to the cis majority where it started to take on connotations of "greetings to nonbinary people of both sexes" and instead of being a subversion of something else it became a reference to itself, and a tool cis people could use to sort nonbinary people into "really men" and "really women". A similar thing happened with "afab" and "amab". Their coinage by trans and intersex people originally served to make visible the act of gender assignation itself, instead of sweeping it under the rug with terms like "mtf" or "born female". Then cis people got a hold of them and used them mostly to talk about other cis people and the words started to take on connotations of "men and people I think of as men" and "women and people I think of as women".

I don't think there's an easy solution to this problem. I do however think that being aware of it is half the battle. When you recognize that language shifts fast, you can be more accepting of people who use language you think of as outdated. When you see that the connotations of words are not fixed, it's less tempting to sort them into "objectively problematic" and "objectively unproblematic" and to sort people into good and evil by which words they use.

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phenakistoskope · 4 months

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There is a difference between Bollywood and Bombay cinema?

listen, subcontinental cinema began in bombay; the very first exhibition of the lumieres' cinematographe was held there in 1896, a few months after its debut in paris, 1895. this event predates the discursive existence of bollywood and hollywood. shree pundalik and raja harishchandra, the films that are generally considered the very first subcontinental features were also exhibited there first.

subcontinental cinema under british colonialism was produced in certain metropolitan centers such as lahore, hyderabad, and calcutta; bombay was just one of them. in 1947, when the indian nation state was formally inaugurated, the idea of a "national cinema" began forming, but given the cultural and linguistic heterogeneity of the indian union, this was quite untenable. regional popular cinemas flourished well into the 1950, 60s, 70s, and 80s and various art cinemas began taking shape alongside.

under the economy that i'm going to completely elide as "nehruvian "socialism"" bombay cinema focused on broadly "socialist" themes, think of awara (1951), do beegha zameen (1953), pyaasa (1957), all of which focus on inequality in indian economy and society from different perspectives. these films were peppered in with historical dramas, and adaptations from literature, but the original stories tended towards socialist realism. reformist films centering the family generally waxed poetic on the need to reform the family, but i haven't seen enough of these to really comment on them.

the biggest hit of the 70s, sholay (1975) was about two criminals, posited as heroes fighting gabbar singh who was attacking village folk. deewar (1975) also had two heroes, and the stakes were the two brothers' father's reputation; the father in question was a trade union leader accused of corruption.

"alternative cinema" included mani kaul's uski roti (1969) and Duvidha (1973) both of which were situated away from the city. then there's sayeed mirza and his city films, most of them set in bombay; arvind desai ki ajeeb dastan (1978), albert pinto ko gussa kyun aata hain (1980), saleem langre pe mat ro (1989) which are all extremely socialist films, albert pinto was set in the times of the bombay textiles strike of 1982 and literally quotes marx at one point. my point is that bombay cinema prior to liberalization was varied in its themes and representations, and it wasn't interested in being a "national cinema" very much, it was either interested in maximizing its domestic profits or being high art. note that these are all hindi language films, produced in bombay, or at least using capital from bombay. pyaasa, interestingly enough is set in calcutta, but it was filmed in bombay!

then we come to the 1990s, and i think the ur example of the bollywood film is dilwale dulhania le jayenge (1995) which, in stark contrast to the cinema that preceded it, centered two NRIs, simran and raj, who meet abroad, but epitomize their love in india, and go back to england (america?) as indians with indian culture. this begins a long saga of films originating largely in bombay that target a global audience of both indians and foreigners, in order to export an idea of india to the world. this is crucial for a rapidly neoliberalizing economy, and it coincides with the rise of the hindu right. gradually, urdu recedes from dialogue, the hindi is sankritized and cut with english, the indian family is at the center in a way that's very different for the social reform films of the 50s and 60s. dil chahta hai (2001) happens, where good little indian boys go to indian college, but their careers take them abroad. swadesh (2004) is about shah rukh khan learning that he's needed in india to solve its problems and leaves a job at NASA.

these are incidental, anecdotal illustrations of the differences in narrative for these separate eras of cinema, but let me ground it economically and say that bollywood cinema seeks investments and profits from abroad as well as acclaim and viewership from domestic audiences, in a way that the bombay cinema before it did not, despite the success of shree 420 (1955) in the soviet union; there were outliers, there always have been.

there's also a lot to say about narrative and style in bombay cinema (incredibly diverse) and bollywood cinema (very specific use of hollywood continuity, intercut with musical sequences, also drawn from hollywood). essentially, the histories, political economies, and aesthetics of these cinemas are too differentiated to consider them the same. bombay cinema is further internally differentiated, and that's a different story altogether. look, i could write a monograph on this, but that would take time, so let me add some reading material that will elucidate this without sounding quite as fragmented.

bollywood and globalization: indian popular cinema, nation, and diaspora, rini bhattacharya mehta and rajeshwari v. pandharipande (eds)

ideology of the hindi film: a historical construction, madhav prasad

the 'bollywoodization' of the indian cinema: cultural nationalism in a global arena, ashish rajadhyaksha

the globalization of bollywood: an ethnography of non-elite audiences in india, shakuntala rao

indian film, erik barnouw and s. krishnaswamy (this one's a straight history of subcontinental cinema up to the 60s, nothing to do with bollywood, it's just important because the word bollywood never comes up in it despite the heavy focus on hindi films from bombay, illustrating my point)

#does this sound insane?#probably #this has been an effortpost #phenakistoskope.txt

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