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wifetomegatron · 7 months

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an alchemy of ore & eu de parfum : how i imagine cybertronians react to human perfume (afab!reader) (nsfw!)

most of the lost light crew only knew about it in passing. rumor was that before the war, the wealthy would import organic plants from off-worlds to extract their oils: steam distillation, boiling, maceration. of course, it wasn't very popular when the planet's atmosphere lacked the proper gases. without volatile elements in the air like oxygen, the exotic scents hardly smelled like anything. it didn't stick against their armors the way it clings onto organic skin. so it became a short-lived experiment that barely dented the surface of the planet's long history of achievements. mechs, trying to replicate organic perfume. it sounded ridiculous.

until perceptor caught a whiff of it: phantom light, brushing against his olfactory sensors. he lifted his helm, finally compelled to tear his optics away from the datapad to look at the human liaison. he inhaled experimentally, failing to be discreet. embarrassed, you tell him it's the new bottle of body wash you've tried: a mixture of wild violets and pink hibiscus. do you like it? he thinks of strange fragile flowers, drifting under the wind. perceptor nearly missed the question, slowly nodding as you leaned closer in worry. it took the mech a lot of self-restraint to not pull you flush against him when the new, alien fragrance hits him square in the chassis like a bullet.

minimus drags his human's wrist across his intake, peppering light kisses along the skin. it was where the sweet, smoky odor was strongest, luring him closer. with you sprawled across his lap: trembling, laughing at the ticklish sensation, minimus couldn't contain the small, helpless groan that escaped him. shamelessly tipping your chin down to press your lips against his. the fragrance of mandarin and jasmine, crowding the space between your bodies. the scientist hovered above your shoulders, mouthguard grazing the junction where your neck meets your jaw. brainstorm tightened his grip against your wrists, pining it above your head. he wants to melt into you, to drown in the overwhelming scent of amber. tyrax, benzoin; he knows they're just a cluster of chemical reactions coming to life along the curve of your collarbones. bonds breaking and fracturing to release something tangy, saccharine. but you're telling him that bulgarian rose, sandalwood — foreign, outlandish names of floras he'd never heard about before was making you smell celestial ? he was the universe's biggest heathen, but primus, save him. you were wiggling underneath his frame, back flat against the pristine table. he says he wants to run a few experiments, noticing how your pupils respond by widening, skin prickling with excitement.

he's trying to be gentle, servos encasing your hip to lower you down his spike. megatron watches as you take him, inch by inch. with your back pressed against his chest plate, he could feel the thrum of his spark against the line of your spine as it bows and curves in pleasure. as you spread your legs further to sink further, he rewards you with a kiss — brushing your hair aside to press his intake against the pulse point beneath your ear. and he tastes it, or rather, breathes it in. he didn't need to, but when your sweat mixes itself with the perfume you always wore: bergamot and peony, he inhales and loses himself even more.

the habsuite reeked of sex, and it crowded the air: humid and heavy, whirl's optic nearly offlined at how obscenely wet you were around his spike. already drunk on your pheromones. so when he lifted both your legs higher — up to his shoulders — to fit himself up to the hilt, whirl didn't expect to catch a whiff of your perfume around your ankles. you whined, a high-pitched, desperate sound, when he stopped thrusting to press his enstril against your achilles heel. that was enough for him to snap. he hoisted you up into a mating press, driving into you with a new kind of vigor. 'you did this on purpose', he emphasized by roughly grabbing your ass to push further into your already trembling cunt. causing you to moan into the dark. 'you knew we'd end up here. like this. filthy, little —'

sicilian mandarin and citrus musk. you made a mental note to yourself to wear the combination around your lover more often.

a/n : for @robot-horde because you're brilliant and left a comment on the tags of this post and it just inspired me to make more.

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khaire-traveler · 26 days

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Since it keeps coming up, I want to state that I do have my asks turned off currently. My inbox was getting flooded with lots of people all of a sudden, especially requests for Subtle Worship posts, and it was beginning to overwhelm me. I have a lot going on in my offline life right now, so I'm also trying to focus on that which is also why I haven't been posting much. I just (literally one week ago) moved across the US, so I've been pretty consumed by the stress of that.

To make it clear, I'm not deactivating my account or going on a hiatus or something. I'm just not going to post as much or answer any asks. I'm just stressed, overwhelmed, and burnt out. Exhausted or anxious have become my natural states of being lately, and Tumblr hasn't exactly been making that better for me. I'll be alright; I'm just tired.

I do plan to continue the Subtle Worship series, but I'm taking a break from those posts for the time being because it takes a lot of time, energy, and effort to make them. It can be quite an exhausting process over time, especially since, admittedly, it's not super rewarding, if I'm being honest. While I make those posts to spread information, I also am often taking requests and creating posts for deities I have no experience with. Although it's great to get the word out about lesser known deities and that is a good feeling, I'm not getting paid or compensated in any way for these requests. I'm giving it my all, trying my best to come up with helpful suggestions on simple worship of deities I have never interacted with, and it takes a lot out of me. Oftentimes, I am attempting to connect with the deity's energy in order to come up with ideas which is extremely tiring when repeating that process over and over again. I enjoy making these posts, but it has stopped being fun for me and has started feeling like an obligation or expectation. So I'm taking a break for now.

I love running this blog, but it's beginning to feel like more work than anything else. I keep doing things for people, going out of my way to attempt to answer questions and creating posts upon request, and yet, it never feels like enough. There's always more for me to do, more questions to answer, more posts to create. This is meant to be an experience that I enjoy, but I'm not enjoying this anymore. It feels like a job that I don't get paid for. I love helping people, don't get me wrong, but there comes a time when it starts to be too much. Some questions are also answered by things in my pinned post, and although I enjoy helping people, as I said, it does get tiring having to redirect them to posts they can find themselves if they look at the links I've provided past the "read more". I will say that I wish people utilized my pinned post more.

So thank you, everyone, for your support and concern. I just want to rest for now. I want to enjoy myself. I want to post things that I like posting and researching things I want to actively learn about. I'm happy to help, but the person who most needs my help right now is myself, so I'm gonna focus on them. Please take care, and have a good day/night. 🧡

#blog post #blog update #personal

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icyg4l · 1 month

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PAC: How Can You Attract More Clientele?

hello beautiful people! i wanted to do something different today! this is for my business owners out there, this one is for you. if you need some extra reassurance/advice on how to gain more traction, this is for you. without further ado, please pick the image that resonates with you the most.

Top Left-to-Bottom Right: (1-4)

Pile One: I heard “something’s brewing” as I was shuffling for this pile. Pile One, do you know how lucky people are to have your talents in this world? Why don’t you take your talents where they belong? I feel like you aren’t really pushing yourself the way that you’re supposed to. You’re all talk but when it comes down to actually putting in the work, you get scary. There’s no point in planning for the future if you don’t live in it. So do what you have to do in order to be known! Another thing about you is that there’s some shame around your work. It’s like you’re embarrassed to show off your stuff so you’ll just hand it off to people that you know and when you get compliments, you won’t necessarily take them as one should. You need to celebrate your work forreal. Your work needs to be seen. You need to be around other creative people so that you can have personal muses in your life. You need to know that your talents will be recognized as long as you let them. All in all, in order to attract clientele, you need to be willing to put yourself out there.

Cards Used: Princess of Swords, The Hermit, Prince of Cups, Knight of Swords, 2 of Wands, 7 of Swords.

extras: shuffle. coffee brewer. sodastream. alliteration. mime. pasties. original invention.

Pile Two: Aggressive marketing is a tactic that you need to take on, Pile Two. This is a pile similar to Pile One in the sense that you are being too coy. I am seeing a fast-paced work environment. You deliver your products fast and you come up with ideas pretty fast. The thing is though, you do not really sell yourself. When I say this, I mean that you are too calm and humble with the way that you market yourself. People tend to overlook you because you’re not really showing off your product/brand. Invest in your brand and you will see better results. If you have a TikTok or Instagram, I’m not going to lie, talking fast or talking in a bubbly manner will help your clients flock to you. I am feeling a little chaotic right now as I type this. I feel like you need to unleash your chaotic side into this marketing. People would be more willing to buy the product if you show off your authentic energy.

Cards Used: Four of Swords, Temperance (RX), The Devil (RX), The Hermit, 9 of Wands, Ace of Swords, Prince of Cups, Eight of Wands

extras: panda express. takeoff. funeral. egg sandwich. sadistic. clueless. “you are the visuals baby.”

Pile Three: There is nothing wrong with getting shit done, Pile Three. I feel like this pile thinks that they do everything right, or do you? I think you need to stop caring about the validation of other people. Do you actually like what it is that you’re doing/selling? Is it fulfilling to present this product to other people? If so, then you need to just be patient. You are very impatient to the process of gaining sales. You need to let more time pass. Your business hasn’t taken off because you do not let shit marinate. If you let time pass by, you would actually gain more clientele. As you await for this moment though, take everything as a learning experience. If you do not feel fulfilled/personally rewarded, then it is time for a rebrand. You need to figure out how this product resonates with you. What is your personal connection with it? How can you connect to other people through this product? What lasting impact do you want to leave on people? I also see that you do need to get involved with people offline as well. Posting flyers up around your neighborhood would really benefit you, my love.

Cards Used: The Emperor, Strength, 4 of Swords, The Devil, The Hanged Man, Judgment, Prince of Wands, Queen of Discs

extras: orlando. drill rap. ohio. “earthy scents.” twisted tea. green giant.

Pile Four: I actually feel like this pile is super close to meeting their goal number of clients. You have been putting in the right amount of work and therefore, you have been getting rewarded. But you need to learn how to network. I feel like this pile just needs to be at the right place at the right time. If you find yourself getting invited to an event that needs your skills, you should check it out. It’ll be the key to your big break. I also think that you should consider trading with other creatives to gain more clientele. Consider promoting other creatives’ work so that more people can come to you. I think it really all comes down to the timing of it all. But your time is pretty soon. You’re already eating good but soon you’ll be eating real good. There’s not really much you have to do but just show yourself off.

Cards Used: Wheel of Fortune. The Magician. Queen of Discs. King of Wands. 7 of Discs. King of Discs. The Emperor.

extras: dill pickle. onion rings. pastel colors. breakfast foods. sizing issues.

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lets-try-some-writing · 5 months

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Survivors

The Pretenders have made attempts to spread. Efforts have been made to stop them, however fear amongst the Decepticons is growing. The Pretenders are appearing more and more often, always being cut down before they can return to their abominable creator. The Cons learn more with every Pretender killed, but the survivors still bear the scars.

Damus wishes more than anything else that he could have minded his own business long enough to not get involved.

Previous part here.

━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙ ━━━━━━━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙

Damus never intended to get involved. He already had enough to deal with considering his outlier ability, his faltering memory, and the fact that empurata had done extensive damage to his ability to function normally. He didn't have the time or the motivation to join up with either faction when the war began, at least at first. He knew Orion Pax, well he knew of him at any rate. He was also familiar with Megatron's doctrine. As such, he took his time trying to decide which faction he would inevitably end up siding with. War would force him to choose eventually, but he was slow in his selection. There was no need to rush, not yet.

He saved up shanix, doing odd jobs for both sides as peace talks began to occur. Maybe he wouldn't even need to pick. At least, that was his hope as he got his life together. With the senate in disarray, they didn't care for the fact that he went to a medic and payed an absurd amount to receive a new set of servos and a proper face. Things were looking up for him and he couldn't have been more thrilled when his old mentor called upon him to do odd jobs and run calculations. Damus didn't know why Shockwave wanted him to collect seemingly random fauna and flora from on and off world, but he did as instructed and was paid handsomely for his services.

Part of him wanted to question, but after the Senate and his prior empurata- No, he refused to risk it. He was getting his life together and he was going to keep things stable. That was his hope. But of course, just as he found himself a spot working as a field scientist for a research facility, everything went to slag. Orion Pax dropped off the face of creation and in turn the war went to the pits and back. Both sides were in an uproar, so Damus tried to steer clear of it. That of course did not last, not when during an expedition underground for a few stellar cycles to escape the horrors of war, he met a mech who was far larger than he remembered.

"You are Damus."

"Orion Pax. It is a surprise to see you here."

"I come in search of the Matrix of Leadership. Do you know its location?"

"Legend says it returned to Primus after Sentinel offlined."

"Do you know the path to Primus's core?"

"Maybe? I can try, but I don't work for free Pax. I am not the lost mech you knew. I have a life, a job. I am not risking it by helping out the Autobots without something in return."

"You desire payment?"

"Obviously. I know the tunnels well enough to get you going in the right direction at any rate."

"That is sufficient. Should you complete this task adequately, you will be rewarded in due time."

There was something very off about the mech who Damus was pretty sure was Orion. But he decided whatever it was, he didn't want to get involved. Orion had been gone for stellar cycles, probably on this foolish mission. It was in his best interest to get Pax where he needed to be so he could get his aft but up to the surface and stop the panic. And so that's just what he did. He walked Orion down the right paths until he didn't trust his memory to lead him further. Orion, or at least the mech who looked a great deal like Orion, watched him with calculating optics and nodded before vanishing into the dark. He decided then and there that he didn't even want to be paid, not when this mech was staring lasers into his spark during their entire walk.

Not his problem. Not his problem.

That was what he chanted to himself as Optimus Prime emerged onto the battlefield not long later and Damus found himself with no choice but to join up with the Decepticons for his own safety. Something was very wrong with Optimus Prime, although he couldn't pinpoint what exactly it was. He was just WRONG and looking back at the tunnel incident, Damus regretted guiding him. He did everything in his power to steer clear despite being with the Cons technically. His hope was that by staying in the city of Tarn, he could keep away from whatever was going on in the war. Being a researcher behind the lines was his safest bet. He didn't even care about trying to make something of himself. The job could frag itself now that he had his face and servos. He just wanted to stay as far away from all of it as he could. Whenever he left the safety of Tarn for whatever reason, he seemed to run into trouble.

Optimus met his gaze twice from a distance. Damus purged after each incident. The Prime was focused on him, and something deep in his spark told him that was a death sentence. A few times he caught sight of another one who gave him unsettling feelings. A yellow scout, one who the records stated was designated as Bumblebee once he finally worked up the willpower to look him up. Then there was the third, the last one that confirmed Damus's fears. Ratchet was the CMO of Cybertron before the war, but now he was on the battlefront every now and then... and he was different. There were rumors that he got ill and then miraculously recovered. But looking at him from a distance? Damus got that same feeling, the one he got when he saw Optimus. Those three were wrong, and so he tried not to leave Tarn for his own safety.

He was concerned to say the least. But he was safe in Tarn. Of course that was fine until Megatron began laying down rules that Damus and many others didn't understand. There were constant warnings about an infection originating from Autobot lines. Medics were suddenly being trained en masse and were promptly put absolutely everywhere. Medical procedures grew more invasive and frequent, constant sanitation became the norm, and any soldier that presented even the slightest behavioral difference after battle was taken away, often never to be seen again. There was also the sudden appearance of strange armor suits that mecha amongst the Decepticons began to wear. There were whole propaganda campaigns urging every soldier to get the suits for their own protection. The bulky things covered every possible part of the frame, and somehow Damus got the distinct impression that something darker was going on behind the scenes. Things weren't adding up.

His fears were confirmed when Optimus Prime decided it was time to give Damus his payment.

Damus had no time to react when the Autobots launched an attack on Tarn shortly after the destruction of the Senate. Damus hid with the rest of the non combatants, but the Prime was quick to appear on the battlefield and tracked Damus down like a bloodhound when he tried to run. Optimus Prime found him huddled amidst the ruins of the bombed out fortress he called home for so long. And it was there that the Prime, no, the monster, ruined his entire life.

"I promised you payment. I have come to offer it."

"GET AWAY!"

"You are one of his students. You will be useful."

"Primus no-!"

He could only scream as the thing's jaw came apart, splitting into a maw of mandibles. Then just as quickly, a squirming bug of some sorts was lowered toward his right optic. It was agony as the thing wormed its way into him, and all the while the monster above him seemed to smile in its convoluted way. All he knew was pain as the thing left in a hurry and he was promptly collected and dragged away to a place he didn't know.

He remembered medics, dozens of them all practically buried under the protective suits the posters were always advertising. He remembered screaming in agony as they worked on him, doing something to his helm and much of his torso. But then it ended, and Damus was left in an isolated room, strapped down to his berth with heavy chains, and standing before him was the one and only Megatron who also wore the suit.

"What in Primus's name happened to me?"

"You were infected with the Pretender larva. We managed to remove the larva itself, but its roots have already spread."

"What does that means? What is this?"

"Listen closely Damus. We don't know where it came from, but the Pretenders are creatures that infest a host and devour them in order to wear their frames as disguises. Optimus Prime is one of these creatures."

"Then he-"

"He spread the infection to others, including yourself. We have found hundreds of others like you in various stages of infection. We have done everything we can to reverse the effects, but all we have accomplished is slowing it down."

"So... I am going to die?"

"Yes. We slowed the infection to a crawl and your life will be extended through frequent surgeries to remove the largest of the roots. However, it will kill you one cycle."

"I will become one of those monsters."

"Only if you give in. We have installed an explosive in your processors that will eliminate you at a moment's notice. This is not out of cruelty, but merely to ensure you cannot become another tool for the Pretender plague."

"I see..."

"You will die, but you need not do so without honor. You carry part of the Pretender genome. With it, you will likely find you have new abilities, most notably, an inbuilt radar which will point toward other Pretenders."

"You want to make me a tool."

"I offer you a choice. You can die here with a quick and painless offlinement, or you can serve us and use your curse to ensure others do not suffer the same fate."

"How many have died due to this?"

"Thousands. We find more every cycle. The thing that calls itself Prime is prolific and must be eradicated."

"Then... I will serve. I will make sure this CURSE cannot spread."

"Good. We will have need of you Damus."

"Please, call me Tarn. I want that monster to know that the city it destroyed yet lives on. That I still remain defiant."

Damus, or rather Tarn took one look at his face and knew what he needed to do. The larva had buried itself into him, and so to remove it, his face that he spent so long achieving was now devastated. However in his rage, he found he didn't care. He wasn't afraid anymore. That monster took his entire life from him. Condemned him to eventual death alongside countless others. He refused to let the newly named Pretenders be. Not after everything.

He wanted to not be involved. But now he had no choice. Passivity got him infected. And so until he perished, he would fight. He could feel the new strength that hummed in his fuel lines. Evidently, the Pretenders were more than simple infiltrators. The world was brighter, more noisy, and far less frightening. The thing within him would kill him, but until it did, he had its strength as its own.

The Pretenders were going to DIE.

With Megatron's aid, Tarn was given access to all he needed. Every moment was spent on the hunt, and the few he found in time to save quickly joined his ranks. Other mecha, each survivors of the larva. Together they grew in number and slaughtered the Pretenders in their cradles. The things were so very weak when young. Tarn could feel the rage of the one called Prime. But he merely smiled as time went on. Every Pretender killed was one less threat. Megatron's warnings now made perfect sense.

An infection was spreading across Cybertron, and Tarn was going to stop it.

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #optimus prime #megatron #tarn #pretender au #damus #slightly rushed #but here it is #more pretender au #I just want to answer the asks Ive gotten and move the the story to earth #but not yet #just a lil longer

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twisted-gremlin · 4 months

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Platonic Yandere third years!

Trey(friend):

- he is- very controling- but passively so-

- its a simple reward punishment system-

- brush your teeth? You get your favorite brekfast- ignore him? Well- guess you don't want his sweets-

- he makes sure that you are in good health at all times-

- he dosent trust alot of people around you- especially those who overblotted and the first years- they are bad influences and can hurt you-

- he cares for riddle- but he cares for you more-

Cater(childhood friend):

- you allways treated him well- so he allways did his best to do the same to you-

- he never let you around his family-

- you two are often in photos together-

- he won't control you, but he will voice his opinions on differnt things, although he is still hesitant on doing so- but he will stock you- both on and offline

- you never notice when eyes are on you because eyes are ALLWAYS on you- so you just accept it as normal and go on with your life

Leona(sibling):

- you're the only sibling he actually liked-

- you allways favored him over the eldest of the family-

- Leona often makes you skip with him and take naps with him- it's for your protection, none else is capable of it-

- if you make it to class there is alot to catch up on and Leona will tutor you, he is smart, he just dosent apply himself

Vil(friend)

- he is very controlling, he treats you like a porcelain doll

-"I'm the fairest and so those around me must also be fair"

- you're not allowed around alot of others "it's for your safety"

- you have alot of skin care things and he has a routine and makes sure that jts ingrained into you

- he makes sure you're healthy, takeing care of yourself, etc. He does adore you after all

Rook

Malleus(friend)

- you are the first person he has ever gotten to call a friend

- he is the most overprotective being ever. If you tear up, get a scrape, or anythibg, it starts to storm.

- he keeps you away from those who have already overblotted, they hurt you before, and he couldn't save you then, but he will now

- he may slowly isolate you, it's for your safety, you won't be alone, you have him for all eternity :>

Lilia(sibling)

- you two have been trough absolute hell, but made it out with the other

- Lilia randomly pops up by you, hugging you, just being an affectionate sibling

- you both raised silver and Malleus, and they both care dearly for you both, and accept how protective Lilia is of you

- hell is raised when you had to go into ramshake, but you took in grim and promised you will be alright

- the Diasomnia bois often visit you, protecting you on Lilias orders when he is busy

- you get free concerts from the pop music club ofc-

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firespirited · 6 months

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thought I might add a little to a question unanswered by the video essay: the why?

not as an excuse, not a full explanation either because there's still the matter of the Telos money.

but why does a man live, breath and eat for his channel/career without the passion for researching and learning?

I can tell you that he truly *did* devote his entire time and energy to producing videos and engaging with the commentariat as a full time job, though if the video scripts were copy paste. He probably feels like he's devoted his entire soul for years into this project and the copy paste was "just" to keep up with the youtube once a week upload demands.

IMHO, what we have is a bloke with crippling anxiety, loneliness and body dysmorphia with a pathological fear of rejection who attempted to build an online queer community that wouldn't ever let him down. As far i can can tell he barely left the house, didn't date and i started to wonder if he really had moved when he wasn't visiting any of Toronto's very gay friendly places or even some of the museums and libraries, wasn't making any local connexions even when people reached out. Instead, he spent his weekends chatting online (often on livestream) about gay media, business, youtube and film making.

I think he could have built that safe haven if he'd kept the day job, produced a fully credited video once a month which was in the format of let's watch this documentary, let's read this book, let's dive into a topic and read the various articles followed by his livestream chats. There is clearly an audience eager for it.

and that's where it gets uncomfortable, right? the lines blur between shyness + not wanting to be hurt vs not collaborating and not being part of other established groups. Canada not only has multiple gay filmmaking scenes, advocacy groups and even a whole bunch of Canadian queer youtubers. They don't have to all get along, because there's more than just the Canada based breadtube, there are a lot of smaller channels that'd love the opportunity to network.

Anyway, it was during a live that i bought up some local Canadian networking opportunity, he backed off quite hard in a way that felt like a little bit more than anxiety about the fierce competition that goes on for such stuff. It felt vaguely like Little Britain's "The Only Gay in the Village" but mostly I was reminded of folks in my life who decided to forge their own paths in charity work and activism, specifically the very dodgy intersection between missionary work and charity and charities that are about the joy of bringing fish to the hungry instead of helping the locals who know how to fish get the new motor for their boat. It's actually a really complex and nuanced conversation where sometimes the least colonialist choice is to hold your nose and work with the local catholic church - yeah I know, that level of complicated, here's some reading before I start on the importance of translating books to creoles being a better investment than teaching english to match an english curriculum and how relief work is often predatory business opportunities and how secularism is a tightrope balancing act and don't get me started.

It is possible to walk and chew gum and listen to music at the same time. We can talk about how plagiarism is bad, how the algorithm rewards it, how this guy is probably getting more ire than the right wing grifters also brought up, why left tube maybe feels a lil intimidating, why people build their own little digital or offline communes, how being an educator and being a thought leader get smooshed together in an attention economy that wants to create influencers with a parasocial engagement with folks that want personal guidance, sometimes stolen valour/plagiarism/fake cancer is for power and clout and sometimes it's a maladaptive response to a desperate loneliness I hope I never fully comprehend.

#saf #ramblings #james somerton #the point is not to dunk but to reflect

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gaywarcriminals · 3 months

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Hi,.....if you don't mind me asking, can I ask your top 5 (or top 3) favorite characters from SVSSS? And why you loved them? And your top 5 favorite moments from the novel? Sorry if you've answered this question before....Thanks....

Sorry for the late reply, I was offline for a bit when it was sent and the notif got buried!

Characters

Yue Qingyuan. I think it will come as no surprise to anyone given my blog title and header lol. Explaining why I love him so much would turn into a full character analysis, but he is just So soggy and bitable. He tries so hard but lives in a world where he's destined to fail, both because of his background and the narrative he's trapped in. He cares so much in a world that will never reward him for that. He repeats the same mistakes over and over because he can't see an alternative path. He is SO SAD AND SO DIVORCED and so traumatized but probably has a complete inability to recognize that fact and he loves and loves and loves but love is not enough to save anyone.

Shen Jiu. He's probably the reason I'm obsessed with SVSSS, instead of just having a passing interest. A week or two after I read the novel for the first time, I started thinking about him and just ended up full on weeping. I find his character incredibly compelling; I love absolute messes, and I really really love seeing a depiction of trauma where the character does not come out stronger or "beautifully broken". It's hard not to be compelled by a character who literally represents the cycle of abuse, who is allowed by the narrative to be both tragic victim and heinous abuser, who is allowed to show what abuse does to people. On a lighter note, I find his younger personality very funny, especially with his dynamic with Yue Qi. He's an absolute gremlin and he lends well to absurdity in lighter fics.

Luo Binghe. Who doesn't love the protagonist!! My reasons for loving Binghe overlap with my reasons for loving SJ— they're foils after all— but I think the core of it is that Binghe is just Deeply Human. He’s just a little guy who’s desperate to be loved. He’s a poorly trained puppy biting down to hold on to the only person who’s ever treated him properly. He’s never done anything wrong in his life.

Shen Qingqiu. His internal dialogue/ narration is why SVSSS is so fun to read! He’s the man shaping this tragedy into a comedy. He’s so insane and so unselfaware, I need to dissect him. Ultimately he’s just a really fun character! 10/10 would chuck him at a wall.

Liu Qingge. He has sword autism what more need I say. I don't talk about him as much on here because my interpretation of him tends to contradict fanon, but I love him so much and I shove him into so many OT3s. Bonus: Qi Qingqi and Mu Qingfang. They're the two background characters with minimal characterization I've latched on to and created massive sprawling headcanons for. This is mostly because I think they are both very sexy.

Moments So fun fact I have clinical memory issues and it’s been a little bit since I read all of SVSSS, so this is WAY harder for me, and I'll definitely miss something. But of what I can recall:

Xiao Jiu threatening to bash another boy’s head in with a rock, and Yue Qi saying “he didn’t mean it”, even though SJ Definitely Meant It and YQ Definitely Knew That. I just find it cute when children are violent I guess 🤣 (Cheng Qian my beloved), and It kind of foreshadows their later dynamic where YQY covers for SQQ without question— YQY thinks he’s doing the same thing as when they were kids, and SQQ thinks YQY is trying to sweep a troublesome mess under the rug. In general, YQY puts a lot more value on their times as slaves than SQQ does/ is more nostalgic for it (probably because YQY’s Intensely traumatic moments were after he joined CQMS, whereas the worst parts of SQQ’s life were all before that point (until Bingge lol))

YQY paying for SQQ’s gambling at the the IAC. Canonized his findom kink.

“My hand slipped 🙂” YQY’s sexist moment in the book imo. Makes me scream on reread.

CQMS will always stand by you 🥹🥹🥹 (honestly any moment where LQG/YQY/the other PLs go to bat for SQQ)

“In this life I’ll give all my loyalty to you” I LOVE THIS LINE SO MUCH AND IM SO SAD MTXT CUT IT IN THE REVISION

#fish answers

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alun1r · 3 months

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Rare Alu Rant About Fandoms bc I never say shit:

Sue me, but getting into a fandom just for the intention of becoming popular is so weird to me.

Like sure you want a lot of people to see what you make. Because making something for the fandom should be seen! That’s dope as hell.

But you’re gonna lose inspiration real fast when you find out content creation takes a lotta work but more often than not comes with little reward.

I hold firmly the belief that Fandom is for making content for the pure reason of just because you can.

✨the joy of free will to bring your delusions to life so others can indulge in their delusions as well✨ Kinda vibes? Yanno?

I never started making HL content with the idea in mind that I’d reach 9k followers on tiktok. And I ain’t gonna lie it’s daunting for me. Specially as someone whose always just made shit for whatever reason without even posting it. But The videos that got me views and followers on tiktok, were made because I was high and wanted to laugh. And I’d figured “what the hell, this made me laugh….Maybe it will make someone else laugh.” And I’m glad it did.

And now I float around just making stuff. I still make whatever I want tbh. I do my best to give credit where credit is due in what I make. And yeah I’ve done some fan service videos and writing here and there because hey it’s fun for me.

I see so many posts or peoples bios saying that they’re working towards being popular in fandom and then their posts are what other people said or made on Twitter or tiktok or Vice versa and there’s often times there’s no real credit to original creators.

Don’t get me wrong, if it’s properly credited, AWESOME. Usually it’s not though, and that’s just wild to me. Because how are you expecting to get popular under your own name when you’re just reposting stuff.

That doesn’t make you a content creator.

A historical collector guess?? Because you’re like idk collecting all the stuff people made and what not onto a new page.

Idk dude. I just miss authenticity I guess. People making stuff and just being excited to show it.

Don’t get me wrong though it’s not all terrible on here and everywhere on the internet for fandoms. I’ve made close friends with other creators who feel and see fandom much the same. Just here to vibe and escape.

I’m not saying I don’t think views and followers and likes and notes or what have you, matter. I know they do. I get a lil confidence boost when something I make pops off. I feel proud.

But man it’s the intention of “ Im trying to be a popular creator” that rubs me the wrong way. Make stuff because you like it. Not because other people will. Doing whatever to get you likes wont bring the same satisfaction. And in more cases than not I see it backfiring and causing drama because, like I said it’s usually shit that’s copied or reposted.

Who knows maybe I’m just old and don’t understand bc I also see fandom and the work I’ve contributed as something I wouldn’t like boast about in real life. Because the reaction wouldn’t be positive. Like just for enjoying Hogwarts legacy I get teased in my daily life from acquaintances. It’s not totally negative. Buts it’s enough for me to know that YEAH 9k followers on tiktok don’t mean anything in the real world LMAO because at the end of the day, offline, I am still just a nerd whose daydreaming in her bedroom to escape reality.

I’m 24 dude. And I work in news. Shit is exhausting. Read a headline and you’ll see what I mean. And I just wanted to rant about it because it’s been bugging me since I joined fandom again last year.

But due to, idk my follower count and whatnot I always felt like I can’t or rather I shouldn’t speak my mind so much for fear of SOMEONE coming for me for something. And man I hate that feeling bc this bitch has opinions and I dislike the idea of feeling like others have control over it. But tbh eh. I wanted to rant. Just speaking into the void of the internet.

If you decide to send anon hate for my opinionated rant be ready for a meme bc I don’t have the mental capacity to take anything other than my IRL life responsibilities seriously lmao.

#credit wars are wack #just credit people YALL #I don’t know or think anything I’ve made has been reposted #don’t really care bc at the end of the day what can I do #I care more when other peoples work is stolen tho #why?#dunno.#fandoms are for fun #and I just hate when the fun is ruined over drama that stems from lack of respect for one another #hogwarts legacy #harry potter #sebastian sallow #fanfiction #art #ominisgaunt #hlcreators

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nobody-for-sure · 2 years

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Language Barrier

Chapter 13: Interlude

(~0.3k words, see chapter list here)

-6:15-

This player is currently offline

"Again?" You sigh. You still haven't seen Autumn on since your abrupt parting before. "I really wanted to apologize in person, but..." You hum, weighing the pros and cons. "I guess if they don't get on before I log off today I'll just send them a message." That'll be almost as good, won't it? You'd hate to loose a friend over a misunderstanding, even if they are just an online one.

Especially Autumn.

They've been a fantastic companion, and you've grown close rather quickly. Besides helping you in combat - which wasn't really necessary, but you both enjoyed fighting together - Autumn turned out to be a great conversationalist. You'd discussed all manner of topics, and even confided a couple secrets that you couldn't bring yourself to share with anyone you knew in real life. Why is it so much easier to talk to someone you don't know? But Autumn made it easy. They took everything in stride, never judged you, and always knew exactly what to say. They never pushed you to share more than you were comfortable with, and never failed to offer good advice or a heartfelt compliment when you were feeling down on yourself.

You daresay they might be one of the best friends you've ever had.

You collect your daily commission reward (already out of resin), and check your friends list again. Nothing.

"Okay, message it is."

You open the chat, type out as much as the character limit will allow, and hit send.

you: Sorry about the other day I wanted to apologize in person but I haven't seen you

"Are you FUCKING serious."

you: I got disconnected the other day but I'd still like to talk next time you're on

"Oh, for fuck's sake, wifi!" You wait a couple minutes, trying to see if the game will reconnect, but Madame Ping is not with you today. Frustrated, you close the game with a huff. "Alright, first thing tomorrow. This is getting ridiculous."

It was not to be.

First thing tomorrrow, you yawn, stretch, and squint your eyes at the bright sun.

"Hey, wait a minute. Where the fuck am I???"

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #sagau #self aware genshin #genshin sagau #lbbynfs

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mbti-notes · 4 months

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Anon wrote: Dear mbti-notes, Thank you for your blog 💜 I hope you enjoyed your holidays. I'm infp, 16 years old and female, who has low-self esteem and feels dissatisfied with life.

My main problem is that I've been skipping school for multiple days because I stay up late, worried if I'm missing out on social media or how I'm going to mask myself the next day. I'm constantly chasing after the satisfaction of completing personal projects online. The 'high' of it and validation from social media is what attaches me to it. Only sharing art I'm proud of. Only sharing idealized surface level tidbits about myself to my classmates. I'm basically pretending to be someone I'm not both online and offline, and so I dig myself into a hole of preventing myself from relaxing or experimenting with my self-expression. I want to grow and learn to be myself, but I'm afraid of feeling exposed.

I crave meaning in my life instead of chasing after something out of my control. I want to finally feel at ease and sleep for my own health. Maybe there's a healthier way to share my artwork and collaborate with other artists? What guidance or advice would you have? I'd like to learn from your wisdom. Best regards, Anon.

-------------------

Wasting mental resources on social media has become a rather widespread problem, so you're not alone. Sharing of yourself in a public forum often means you're socializing in a chaotic and indiscriminate manner, which unfortunately sets you up to live at the mercy of external stimuli. Your social behaviors become more and more automatic as you keep reinforcing the same validating reward patterns over time. Eventually, your attention, energy, time, self-esteem, and self-worth slip out of your hands. It's hard to feel good about yourself once you've crossed the line from enjoyment into powerlessness.

I use terms like "stimuli", "reinforce", and "automatic" for a reason; they come from a particular branch of psychology called behaviorism. Many people still don't know that tech companies spend money on behavioral science, even recruiting psychologists to their projects. Behavioralists approach human behavior as "programmable", in the same vein that Pavlov trained his dogs to salivate at the sound of a bell. Social media companies invented "bells" to make you feel good (engaged), to make you feel bad (reactive), and to keep you running back to them regularly for instant gratification (addicted).

The difference between Pavlov's dog and you is that the dog begins and ends under the control of its owner and thus has no choice but to learn the automatic behavior, whereas you gave up your free will to become an automaton. When your mind has been reduced to such a primitive state of chasing base desires on an endless loop, your intellectual faculties wither from disuse, and your soul eventually feels starved of meaning. Worst case, one becomes a dull and empty shell of a human being.

"I crave meaning in my life instead of chasing after something out of my control." The word "crave" is significant. Humans need a sense of agency and autonomy. Humans need a sense of social belonging. Humans need intimate and loving relationships. Humans need to occupy themselves with meaningful activities. The issue is whether you know the right methods of fulfilling your needs.

Choosing the wrong methods is one major reason people feel that life lacks meaning. When important human needs go unfulfilled for too long, they morph into desperate and seemingly irrational "longings", "desires", and "cravings" that lead people to choose worse and worse methods in a vicious cycle. Just think of how poorly your rational mind works when you get too hungry; food becomes the only thing you can think about and you're liable to grab anything and put it in your mouth without any regard for its nutritional value. The same goes for psychological, social, and spiritual needs.

A need is legitimate, universal to all humans, and must be satisfied in order to live a healthy and fulfilling life. A want is a method of fulfilling a need, but wants are not always legitimate. A want is legitimate if it is a positive and constructive way of obtaining what you need. A want is illegitimate when it leads you to destruction or to harm yourself/others, which, in the end, actually prevents you from obtaining what you need. Skipping school and sabotaging your own future is a good example of destructive behavior. If a want is determined to be illegitimate, then you must find a better method, if you care about your well-being. People who confuse needs and wants often end up chasing the wrong things in life and/or feeling inexplicably unsatisfied whenever they get what they want.

Why have humans proven so easy to manipulate? Because:

many people lack the self-awareness to understand their own needs and wants, and

they were never taught the right methods of fulfilling them.

Companies wanting to profit off you will try to find the most effective way to trigger a sense of privation in you, to bring up an unmet need, and then manufacture a "desire" or "craving" for a product that supposedly meets that need. The more desperate your feeling of privation is, the faster you'll run and the more you'll pay (not just in money) for whatever they're selling.

Therefore, inoculating yourself against such manipulation involves:

improving your self-awareness so that you fully own your needs instead of ceding control of them to others, and

learning healthy methods to attend to your needs so that you aren't easily taken in by harmful quick-fixes or false remedies.

"Maybe there's a healthier way to share my artwork and collaborate with other artists?" This is the right question to ask. If you develop Ne properly, you'll understand that there's almost always a better way of doing things. You don't have to live life always reaching for the stars, but at the very least, you should know to be proactive and seek a better way when the current way is harming you.

Let's examine two needs at play in your situation:

1) The Need for a Healthy Social Life: Why do you think that, in the age of social media, society is grappling with an epidemic of loneliness? When people feel lonely, their desire for social connection grows louder and louder. Suffer loneliness for too long and people start to get desperate and settle for whatever social contact they can get. Social media makes it very easy to get social contact... but it's like eating leftover scraps when you could be feasting on wagyu.

In terms of personal growth, the easy way isn't usually the right way. Sure, subsisting on scraps helps ease the hunger to socialize, but it's no way to live in the long term. For life to feel meaningful and fulfilling, one cannot only survive, one must also flourish. To flourish includes living up to your potential and living your life with purpose.

While there's nothing inherently wrong with having online friends, people who only have online friends tend to report dissatisfaction with social life. The fact of the matter is that online friends should not be used as a substitute for real-life relationships. Online friends should only be used to complement an existing social support network or used as a convenient gateway into a new real-life friendship. Online friendships are simply missing too many key ingredients that are needed for meaningful relationship.

There are tried-and-true ways of: improving friendships, making new friends, and building a strong social support network. E.g. Spend more quality time with old friends but perhaps in new situations that allow you to get to know each other even better. Extend your network by getting to know friends of family or friends of friends. Take a class or join a group of people with similar interests. Get more involved in your local community or volunteer. Take more initiative to organize get-togethers, invite people out, or lead a group activity.

Socializing is a legitimate need, so you should allot time for it. However, time is a finite resource, which means use it wisely. Do you want to spend most of your time collecting scraps online, socializing with undiscerning people and getting less than satisfying results? Or do you want to socialize in a more purposeful way, setting the right goals, targeting the right people, and getting more satisfying results? The choice is yours.

2) The Need for Personal and/or Professional Development: You are using art as a way to develop your potential and perhaps develop a professional skill. Good learning is something that can only happen under the right conditions, so the issue is whether you have set up the right learning conditions for yourself. Is soliciting (at times ignorant) feedback from people who only care about you to the extent that you can entertain them the best way to learn and improve? As long as you feel like you're being rewarded for putting on a show, won't learning always take a back seat to ego?

Would you be better off embedding yourself in a group of art enthusiasts, devotees, and experts who have real-life knowledge and experience of the art world? Unless you live in the middle of nowhere, even the smallest towns have artsy people floating around, perhaps there are a few you don't yet know in your school. Forming close, real-life friendships with them would be more rewarding and also more likely to get you that safe and nurturing environment you need for freely exploring your talents, wouldn't it? It's just one idea. I'm sure you can come up with more ideas through assessing all the resources available to you.

Sixteen is usually the time when teens start really venturing out into the world to explore their options. You need to get out into the world and challenge yourself more in order to grow your self-esteem. Don't limit yourself by becoming overdependent on social media scraps for cheap validation.

Inferior Te means that Fi doms often don't place enough value on goal-oriented behavior, and as a result, their behavior is often inefficient and ineffective. It's fine to want to explore and enjoy some fun moments online, but exploration should eventually be leading you somewhere positive, good, real, and meaningful. And if you already have some idea of where you want to go, the key is to choose the right path for getting there, even if it's the harder path. It sounds like you have a problem of too often choosing the easier path.

If you're like other INFPs, you easily get swept up by your feelings and it causes you to perceive situations in a distorted way, unable to objectively weigh the pros and cons, which leads to miscalculating the consequences of your behavior. If your behavior keeps getting negative consequences, it's an important sign that you're not caring well for yourself - it's a call to change your behavior. Fi can't feel at ease as long as you're acting against your own well-being. It's good that you have some idea about what your needs are and you're trying to respond to them, the crucial step is to put more careful thought into choosing healthy methods.

#infp #auxiliiary ne #inferior te #social media #socializing #needs #ask

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cosmicbash · 1 year

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Wanna make a short post because I need like an hour to sit down and type out a proper explanation and apology to so many online friends for disappearing for so long. And this will force me to finally HAVE to--- but

I know I've been offline for a hot minute, more like a hot century in fandom life, but I've just been going thru it. Like REALLY fucking going thru it the last year.

To keep it short like I said, I've just been going through a whole medical mystery with some leg pain that started last year and now over 10 months later, dozens of tests some painful some not, months of physical therapy, etc, has left me still with no answers, no job, a legal battle for owed insurance money from said job, daily pain, and the only reward for my shit luck so far being a permanent disability placard for my car , because getting half crippled at 26 is truly a reward, ha. Ha.

I'm a little bitter but ignore that cuz it comes and goes in waves.

I've got a shit ton of asks and emails and comments that I still need to sort thru, and I' so sorry for people who thought I was ignoring them! I'm not! Just, getting outta my head to go online has been hard.

But I wanna come back, i wanna draw again, write again, just. Create. Again.

#im alright #sorry lem #and sorry Jan #and megami #and metalhead #and fuck so many more friends #technically #personal shit #but ill tag #emgk #too since alot of yall follow that tag

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walkingwiththegods1 · 10 months

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What I learned from an Headblind Godspouse, when I'm Psychic myself; and a Solitary Pagan. (Or... Why all the serious voices in Paganism, matter!)

In case you doesn't know yet, @darkamberdragon decided to leave Paganism; which is a news than saddens me, 'cause I had been her follower for many years; and bloggers so dedicated in what they do like her... Are not common in these days, when people just glossed the happy and almost perfect lifestyle that brings Paganism, and intentionally hide the not so glorious part of it. She was different: She said everything, and... I couldn't have been more thankful for a blooger liker her, that lives her life offline too and teached us in the same time; how to navigate in this path full of uncertainty; each and every day of our lives.

I doing this post, to honour the work and time than @darkamberdragon gave us in all the years she wrote her journey and experiences through LiveJournal; WordPress, Facebook... And Tumblr. Also, because she is one of the main reasons I dared to write about my own experiences with Deities online, despite than a I'm a shy person myself and a lonely Pagan; for lack of support for religious minorities in my nation, and... To encourages to any of you than feels or have felt, than because you can't hear; sense or see to The Gods or Spirits, you can't be a blogger. (Is not true: Of course, you can!.. Your voice is equally as important and valid, for all of us.)

And, now... What I learned from Dark Amber Dragon, through almost 11 years; as her follower and fan:

Devotion, Spirituality and Faith, is more important than been a Psychic/Medium: If you are serious in your path, does devotional work at the extent of your capacities and time; you are persistent in your Spiritual's Life, and your Faith is strong, even if sometimes we have doubted... You don't have to be a Psychic to be in Paganism, or for to be a Pagan Blogger.

Telling the not so good things... Teaches us more than the good things we experiences: We are so contaminated by the ''All is Happiness, Friendships and Music, here!...'' Than most of us doesn't want to hear about the negative part of being Pagans: Loss of Friends than abandoned us for our choice, the suffering than came with this path; Dealing with Loneliness and the despise of people than we knew, etc. That part, is needed to be said or wrote too; 'cause maybe someone than thinks they are suffering alone; or believes than they may be broke somehow, because ''Everybody is happy, but me: I must be doing something wrong...'' … Realizes than all of us have bad days and bad times, too. (Besides... I learned than I wasn't the only one harrased by spirits than mades me doubted of myself, and/or my relation with The Divine.) Another thing I learned from her without even trying, is than when you say than things with Deities have their not so good moments; is... Than maybe you can help to someone else to gives them a solution to their issues with Deities or Spiritual Beings, or at least than they will live with less anguish and more in peace. (If you have an experiences than wasn't totally perfect, post it when you feel ready: Who knows... You can help a person in need of help, to live in peace!)

Believing without Seeing, is a reward in itself: You maybe are unable to see or hear to your Deities... That doesn't matter! (Many others can, but... They still doesn't believe: They make excuses like they wasn't okay that day, they said to themselves than it didn't happen; than they imagine what they hear and/or saw; and after Deities get tired of being so rudely ignore, and left... They are the first in ask ''For a sign or miracle'', in their time of despair!) I believe in Deities, a few years before they started to appear in my life: I was rewarded for only believe, in the same way one of my favorite bloggers was! And, even if you never saw them or hear them in real life then; remember this: Most of The Pagan Community is like you, than ocassionally have visits in dreams with their Deities; so don't worry about it, because... You are in a very good company!

Being Rational and Research is key, in this path: Something than people doesn't know about depression, is than a rare sympton; is... Alucinations! (I have suffered that sympton, most of my life.) Thanks to reading to @darkamberdragon talking about Discernment, as an important part of an Spiritual's Path and in Paganism; I started to trained myself to learn to distinguish between Visions and Alucinations: Thanks to that, I realized than when Spirits and/or Deities acted in ways than terrified me; BUT... I wasn't feeling their energies at all, I realizes than it was only an Alucination; so I was able to detached emotionally of the scene till it ended, after many seconds of anguish of my part. Other important thing about being Rational when you are a Religious/Spiritual person... Is than if we spended thinking in Spirituality and/or Religion 24/7, then we are risking our personal life in The Human World: That's why Discernment is an habit that will keep us with our feet in the ground, to avoid to loses all that we can acomplish; when we put our Spiritual's Life, as our only priority. Research, is vital when you are posting about a complex subject as Religion; Spirituality; Occultism, Magic, Metaphysics and/or Paganism: @darkamberdragon, when she posted about any of these subjects; she delivered each post that was worthy to be read once and again for the interesting info in it; and for her impeccable writing. (I even learned a few things about life in Norway: Now I'm doing the same, but adding Taino Words and Myths when I have the chances to introduces them; and the subject justify to uses them, of course!)

Relations with Deities, have ''Their Highs and Lows...'' I thoughted I was the only one, with relations with Deities, than feels like ''One day, I woke up in Heaven!... And the next, in Hell!'' (For ten years, my relation with The Goddess of Love and The Trickster; was like that: When both were lovely and caring for me; and in others... They said hurtful things to me, and changes their appareances in a way that scared me; and leaved me alone for hours and days to no end, while I was crying and wondering if I should stay with them; or leave to both of them, for good: One day, after ten years of that... Both of them just appeared and hugged me, and after that hug and felt than their energies been the same as the time I met them; I knew than all that rough time, was finally over!) But she too talked about it, and I realized than relations with Deities, are not always harmonious and a constant source of emotional security: Sometimes, it can makes you fearful than you are doing something wrong; and the true thing is... The longer you are in any relation, (Be it with Deities, Humans; or Anything in between) the biggest the chances than you will have at least one or two moments of ''Fight, get angry; walk away... And wishing to never see to each other, again!''

Taking time to healed yourself of any Illness, or for taking care of your Emotional Wellbeing; is a duty to yourself and others: @darkamberdragon, had a time where she needed to attend to her health: I waited patiently, until she was better enough to write again. If you have to leave for a while, just said it and returned when everything is solved; or almost solved: If you continued to write so you doesn't loses your followers, you are not doing any favour to them; and neither to yourself. (If they really loves you and cares for you, they will stayed until you are better; and, if they doesn't stayed... They wasn't worthy of your time: Forget them... You will have better followers, someday!)

And, the last part of my post about what I learned from Darkamber Dragon, is... There is still Honesty and True in online blogs: As a Psychic, I have times where I don't feel the intentions of people, in and out of Internet. (It took me YEARS, to start to feel the energies of people in websites and blogs; with the good, and mostly the ugly part) After a few experiences online than left me crying and away of blogs for weeks... I can tell you one thing with total certainty: @darkamberdragon, is one of the few bloggers than I have felt she has been truthful in every and each single post, including the last one she posted. Another thing, I have to said; is than in all the time I have been reading her in LJ, WP; and Tumblr... Is than she is one of the few bloggers than I have followed, than was honest in all, including her devotion to each of her sites, and to her followers. (I wrote her, with my now lost account of Yahoo!; and for my surprise and joy, she answered my message: I was thrilled, 'cause I wasn't expecting than she answered it. [It was only a few words, but... I was in a very bad moment, and those few words... Were all that I need to go on, in life: Never underestimate the power of say something important, in the right moment!)

I saw many Pagan Sites, where bloggers sounded very serious and committed in this path; but... One day they left, without saying why they were leaving; or without say goodbye: I waited for days, weeks; months; a year, two years or more; until I realized than they onlywas posting ''Because Paganism was the trend in that moment'', or maybe they doesn't had the enough conviction in their beliefs; or simply the social pressure was to much and they backed to mainstream religions...

…@darkamberdragon, respect and care for all of us enough; to tell us why she left; and to at least say goodbye, to all of us: She is a human being than deserves our respect and admiration, 'cause she standed for all she believed and did in all this time, while I saw others leaving their blogs after a few months or years posting; and she was committed in heart and soul to put her mind and all she knew, with all her experiences and time than are the most invaluable thing you can give to others; and she wasn't afraid of being vulnerable. (I hasn't learned yet, to show being vulnerable in front of others, because of bad experiences; and trust issues for Childhood's Traumas, but... I hope to being like that in the near future, soon!)

I wish to have the chance to meet her in person, or a least to saw her from afar; thriving, surrounded by loyal friends and happy... (Well, a trip with route Caribbean – Northern Europe, is not very easy to make. [...Or, cheap!]) But... If I can make that trip, and the meeting never happen; I will take it, as ''It wasn't in my Fate!...'' And, if it happens; I can talk of anything 'cause I'm a ''Library'Mouse'', myself: If doesn't have to be about Spirituality, or Paganism at all; unless she wanted to talk about any of the two.

Darkamberdragon: If you are reading this, I hope only than to you can find happiness and peace in whatever you do; from now on. Also... You are a great writer: When you feel better, write about anything you want and than really inspires you in that moment: Writing and being able to transmit what you feel, is a rare and precious gift!

We could be Pagans today, but we doesn't know if we have to leave someday; and one of the things than I love about Paganism, is than we respect the right of any person than is respectful; to become part of the Pagan Community in real life, or online... And we respect their right to leave, when the need to go to a new place to continue with their next step; in their unique Spiritual's Path in life!

This is all in this post: A part of me wished than she stay, but... A human being than have knew so many times how she must feel, and I felt the emotions in her last post as a Pagan; I can only wished than she back someday, only if is what she desires.... But if she decided to never back to Paganism and/or Spirituality, again... I only wish than all the love and time she gave us, returns to her in form of blessings and of being surround by good people; so she can heal of the pain and sadness she is feeling, the sooner possible... And she back to be happy again!

Thanks for all, @darkamberdragon: I'm really going to miss you... And than you find Happiness and Light in your life, from now on!

Than all the Pagans than has to leave this path of life, will be well treated for all The Pagans than stay; and they will always have the support and love of all their Pagan Family, Friendships; The Pagan Community at large, and from all their loyal followers... So Be It!

#pagan writer #paganism #pagan writings #pagans #pagan #eclectic pagan #ecletic pagan #hellenic pagan #lokean #pagan from the caribbean #i wish you the best darkamberdragon #and thank you for all you did in all this years #than you heart finds peace and happiness in your new path #so be it

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sen-no-kotowari · 1 year

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PGR S Lee Character Profile

Hello! Here's S Lee's character profile. Over the next few days, I'll also be posting Qu's and Changyu's character profile plus the first chapter of Amplifier Selena's Interlude Story. I will eventually post Roland's Interlude Story, I apologize if it's taking a bit longer than it should be. As for the voice lines of the characters released in the bili servers, I'll be doing a tester with Fire Lee that'd be marked as "Beta" since most of the JP audio is transcribed by ear. That's it for now, I hope everyone enjoys the translations. You can learn more about him on the cut down below ♪(^∇^*)

Voice Line Data

Motion Voice Lines

Lobby Voice 1

Lee: If you don't need anything else from me, you ought to train your mental fortitude.

Lobby Voice 2

Lee: You seem to be free right now. How about we train together?

Lobby Voice 3

Lee: I won't miss the words you say to the letter—be it your command, or anything else you've said.

Raise Affection Level

Lee: I didn't say I hate it.

Repetitive Taps

Lee: Will you stop that...!

Log-In

Lee: Been waiting for you. There are several peculiar parts to this experiment's data. Looks like we'll be holed up in the lab today.

Online for a Long Time

Lee: I'll protect you, so don't worry and take a break. No need to always push yourself, you know.

AFK

Lee: If there are some things you can't deal with, you can ask me for some advice instead of dealing with them alone.

Shake

Lee: You really... love doing this huh.

Offline for a Long Time

Lee: I just happen to be on duty today. It's not like I'm waiting for you to return or anything.

Introduction and Formation

Structure Acquired

Lee: So you're the new Commander, huh... I hope you're not a fool.

Level Up

Lee: That's just natural.

Advancement

Lee: Doing good. I think I'll only get stronger from here.

Model Improvement

Lee: So it's like this huh... There's more room for improvement.

Skill Upgrade

Lee: This mobilization pattern seems to be useful, might use it next time.

Equipment

Lee: Hmm~... Seems easy to use. Not bad.

Add in Team

Lee: You made the right decision by choosing me.

Assign as Captain

Lee: Me? Captain? I'll show you how to lead perfectly.

Mission Accomplished

Voice Line 1

Lee: Seems like we've received the rewards, let's go claim them.

Voice Line 2

Lee: We'll receive a reward once we've finished the mission... It's common sense you know?

Daily Small Talks

Voice Line 1

Lee: …Do you need something?

Voice Line 2

Lee: If you don't need anything else from me, you ought to train your mental fortitude.

Voice Line 3

Lee: Finally decided to come back to us? Just when I'm about to be lost in thought.

Voice Line 4

Lee: You have other work that doesn't involve with just sitting around, right?

Voice Line 5

Lee: You've taken enough rest already. It's about time we head back to battle.

Voice Line 6

Lee: You seem to be free right now. How about we train together?

Voice Line 7

Lee: Why do you keep spacing out?

Voice Line 8

Lee: Your work as the commander is indeed tiring. If you feel your body starts feeling uncomfortable, you absolutely must tell me about it.

Voice Line 9

Lee: We're very lucky to have a person like you to be leading us.

Voice Line 10

Lee: If something's bothering you, be sure to tell me, no matter what.

Voice Line 11

Lee: I won't miss the words you say to the letter—be it your command, or anything else you've said.

Voice Line 12

Lee: What am I listening to with my headphones? N-no, these aren't headphones! You can't hear anything from them!

Voice Line 13

Lee: I don't easily make any promises, but... I wish to have your word of promise...

Voice Line 14

Lee: Compared to the rest of humanity, our lives are quite longer... I would offer you every ounce of my life...

Raise Affection Level

Voice Line 1

Lee: No need to try and humor me.

Voice Line 2

Lee: I already know how you humans usually are, it's useless trying to control me from the shadows.

Voice Line 3

Lee: I didn't say I hate it.

Voice Line 4

Lee: I've already gotten used to you, Commander.

Voice Line 5

Lee: I don't mind if we've grown closer than before.

Voice Line 6

Lee: I want to know more about you...

Voice Line 7

Lee: I'm really happy that you also have continued to try and understand me...

Voice Line 8

Lee: I want to be by your side from now on.

AFK

Voice Line 1

Lee: For you to leave your post during work hours...

Voice Line 2

Lee: If there are some things you can't deal with, you can ask me for some advice instead of dealing with them alone.

Voice Line 3

Lee: If you suddenly stay silent like that, it'll make me restless instead... Please do something, anything.

Voice Line 4

Lee: Commander? Are you here? Don't scare me like that...

Online for a Long Time

Voice Line 1

Lee: Is there some kind of benefit for you to even work while you're on break?

Voice Line 2

Lee: Being devoted to your work is great and all, but I think you should look after yourself more.

Voice Line 3

Lee: I'll protect you, so don't worry and take a break. No need to always push yourself, you know.

Log-In

Voice Line 1

Lee: Morning. Let's start the operation once you're done preparing.

Voice Line 2

Lee: Kept me waiting. First off, let's start analyzing the sample specimen of an Infected from yesterday.

Voice Line 3

Lee: The data analysis is already done. Let's begin the discussion if you're awake. [1]Audio: The data parsing is done. Once you're fully awake, let's move on to the discussion.

Voice Line 4

Lee: Been waiting for you. There are several peculiar parts to this experiment's data. Looks like we'll be holed up in the lab today.

Offline for a Long Time

Voice Line 1

Lee: Are you the new Commander?

Voice Line 2

Lee: I knew it was the right call to keep on waiting. Welcome back, Commander.

Voice Line 3

Lee: I just happen to be on duty today. It's not like I'm waiting for you to return or anything.

Voice Line 4

Lee: Thank you, for coming back here.

Shake

Voice Line 1

Lee: W-what!?

Voice Line 2

Lee: Are you a kid or something...!

Voice Line 3

Lee: ...Are you satisfied now?

Voice Line 4

Lee: You really... love doing this huh.

Repetitive Taps

Voice Line 1

Lee: Will you stop that...!

Voice Line 2

Lee: Are you trying to make me sick or something?

Voice Line 3

Lee: Is there something fun about this...?

Voice Line 4

Lee: Just you wait, if I meet you in person, I'll make sure to poke the living hell out of you.

Activity Task Full

Lee: Activity level's already at max. Don't forget to get your rewards.

Triumphant Return

Lee: And another perfect line of fire.

Squad Member's Return

Lee: Welcome back. It's already praise-worthy to be able to come back in one piece.

Battle Dialogues

Battle Start/Character Switch/Voice Line 1

Lee: Think you can escape the bullet trajectory I've calculated huh.

Voice Line 2

Lee: You call that hiding?

Voice Line 3

Lee: It's wise to just give up.

Ultimate Skill

Lee: There's only one end that awaits you.

Light Damage

Lee: Tch... Not bad...

Heavy Damage

Lee: Situation's...looking bleak huh...

Incapacitated

Lee: It's all right... I won't...

Friend Support

Lee: You won't have any problems as long as I'm here.

QTE

Lee: Just give the orders.

Battle End

Lee: And another perfect line of fire.

Structure Documentation

Document Detail 1

A new model designed to utilize Lee's outstanding calculation abilities efficiently. It was produced in the same production lot as Kamui's model.

Document Detail 2

With his perception modules completely remodeled, he can control the bullet trajectory at will. His ranged attack's precision capabilities have improved compared to his previous model.

Document Detail 3

An anchor lock-on function has also been added. If paired with Lee's precise calculational prowess, it is possible to rapidly mark and track different enemies.

Document Detail 4

In any case, Lee's newer model was designed to prioritize reinforcing its calculation module's efficiency. Because of this, Lee could currently calculate even the most intricate data down to just microseconds.

Document Detail 5

Lee's manufacturing abilities as well as repairing abilities have immensely blossomed—he successfully remodeled a Structure once.

Document Detail 6

Lee once made a miniature robot for the Commander. Moreover, the said robot is being updated every single day. It's said that the Gray Raven's Commander has been using the robot's alarm function to wake up on time.[2]

Rumors and Secrets

Secret 1 Highly sensitive when it comes to numbers.

Secret 2 He insists that there is a problem with the model's automatic heat energy circulation system. However, there aren't any signs of a request to get it fixed.

Secret 3 Lee's win rate against Kamui in a verbal argument is 50%.

Secret 4 His favorite color is blue. The color of his circulation fluid is also blue.

Secret 5 His hair quality is stiffer compared to other Structures.

Secret 6 Although Lee frequently gets requests for his contact details from female humans more than female Structures, he rejects all of them.

Secret 7 He is more knowledgeable about internal framework than external appearance.

Secret 8 Had a logical and objective conversation with the Commander about the functional importance of designing a Structure. The conversation also included the cushion on Bianca's chest.

Secret 9 Lee once did a research on Kamui's vocal device and was able to shut it down.

Secret 10 He has managed to develop and install a quasi-version of an Inverse Device in the robot he made.

Secret 11 He was almost forced to crossdress by Kamui and his friends after a certain incident[3], but Lee manages to avoid it.

Secret 12 Lee has the Commander's consent in turning his series of observations and comprehended material of the person in question into data and compiled them for safekeeping.

Spoken dialogue is different from the one that's written.

A callback reference to A Lee's Affection Story.

The incident in question happened in Main Story Chapter 11 (Nona Ouroboros)

#pgr #pgr lee #punishing gray raven

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feedingtheflockministry · 9 months

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Does Our Online Posts and Comments Matter to Ministry and Our Salvation?

Is social media posting or resharing of Christ centered content a form of ministry? Is it helpful, effective, and important to the growth of the Kingdom of Heaven? Do our online comments effect our salvation or the salvation of others? Let’s see what the scriptures say about these things.

Apostle Paul in his first letter to the church in Corinth makes this statement, “So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. He who plants and he who waters are one in purpose,a and each will be rewarded according to his own labor. For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, God’s building.”

In today’s world we are consumed by such things as; political rhetoric, corruption in high places, wars, calamities, fear, and righteous anger. These things drive us to post comments and content in opposition to them. These things are all part of a world that is passing away. As believers in Christ we need to spend more of our online time sharing Christ with others through things that will bring about life eternal in the lives of others that view our posts.

You might say, “Well, everyone that views my posts has already heard the gospel message.” To that I say, “That might be true, but how many of those individuals received the message, or needs encouragement to hold fast to what they have received?”

When we spend our time online or even offline talking about the lawlessness of others, we are actually helping in fulfilling the words of Christ. Not words of something good, but bad. Christ said this, “And at that time many will fall away, and they will betray one another and hate one another. And many false prophets will rise up and mislead many people. And because lawlessness is increased, most people’s love will become cold.”

Increased lawlessness causes many to turn to a cold and unloving heart towards others. If we do not have love in our hearts we are useless, and no better than those without Christ.

Apostle Paul wrote in the same letter to the church at Corinth this, “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.”

Jesus also said this in His Sermon on the Mount, “You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may prove yourselves to be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Even the tax collectors, do they not do the same? And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing than others? Even the Gentiles, do they not do the same? Therefore you shall be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

Jesus also said this, “but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it is better for him that a heavy millstone be hung around his neck, and that he be drowned in the depths of the sea. Woe to the world because of its stumbling blocks! For it is inevitable that stumbling blocks come; but woe to the person through whom the stumbling block comes!”

We must focus on keeping our love in tact. For if we spend our time sowing discord that brings about a hostile and unloving environment that bears the bad fruit of hatred and anger in others instead of love, joy, and peace, then we too will receive that as our reward in the end.

#bible teaching #bible #scriptures #christianity #jesus christ #biblescripture

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fioras-resolve · 3 months

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31 Days

Exactly a month ago, I started playing this game that my extended family had made. It's a daily math game, or like, a daily classical cryptography game. I have been solving the new puzzles each day, for 31 days.

I'm still taking it in, you know? I've never had such a clear idea of how long a month is, but now I have to know: It's the time between getting an email showing me this game and right now. Perhaps this should horrify me, as confronting the passage of time should come with the spectre of mortality. But as someone who has never believed herself to have a future, it has the opposite effect. It gives me a sense of just how time passes, how long things take, and how much I can do in a month.

But it's hard to believe there can be anything in my life so consistent. I flounder between projects and take opportunities when they come, my activities or mood on any given day is largely dependent on fate and happenstance. But I have somehow managed to do this one tiny thing each day for a month. It makes me think about the importance of rituals, to have something in your life that can anchor you in time.

These days, games come packed with rituals in some form or another. Plenty of games, online and offline, come with daily bonuses, daily activities, and rewards for sticking with it, every day. It's hard to know where to draw a line. These techniques are a few of many that companies can use to extract every bit of time, money, and attention out of you. But in individual cases I am okay with them. I like the daily nature of Wordle or Animal Crossing. I like it when Fire Emblem Fates or Bravely Default give me small rewards as real-world time passes. In the days of the DS or 3DS these mechanics felt more experimental and benign. I can't help but wonder if that was ever really true.

Summary is an ephemeral game. It changes every day, and a missed day cannot be taken back. Missing a day in my streak was actually what made me give up Wordle, unsurprisingly, and that'll probably be what gets me to drop this game. Back when Wordle was popular, there was a controversy over it being ephemeral like this. Some didn't like its daily slow-paced nature, which is fair enough if you don't care for game as ritual. Others made an argument that the daily format is inherently anti-preservation, as one day's experience will never be the same as the next. I balk at this framing, as someone in theatre. Yes, some art cannot be truly (or at least losslessly) preserved. It is of the moment, and that is part of the beauty of it. For art to be an event, for it to require you to be there, in that moment, is not as terrible a thing as some would tell you.

Thinking on it after a month, I'm not sure if I'd say I "like" Summary as a math-y puzzle game. It's missing the kind of tension and strategy that Wordle has, and while its puzzles are certainly coherent, I don't really feel like I'm getting "better" at the game, or that it particularly wants me to. I'm curious to ask the developers how they designed these puzzles, because as a designer, this game is a fascinating piece of work. But the Wordle formula is... It's one of those things, you know? It's like Minesweeper, it has a set of mechanics that just works, and it's hard to replicate without losing the charm somewhere. Summary is a good attempt, one I've stuck with for a month and plan to continue. But the ritual matters more than the game.

#game design #wordle #classical cryptography #mathblr #math games

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