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#some people do too much and it’s unappealing
euphoricfilter · 6 months
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guys i think i’m making a friend. asmr guy might actually be starting an asmr channel 🥳
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slipper007 · 8 months
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Sami if you read this I'll fight you in a parking lot. You're not allowed to.
#to delete#feeling trapped#too stressed to sleep but have to be in bed or I'll wake my cat and he'll be up til 5#really wish life could just. cut me some slack.#but it's not going to. and asking for that makes me sound ridiculous#bc really what am i doing. endless cycle of apply for job until too stressed then do something to relax until i can cope. apply to more.#nothing is coming from it. nothing worthwhile.#every interview I go to I'm bending over backwards to be appealing. and they like that but no job is willing to bend for me#and I know they're not gonna but hh. wish being employable and being myself was something I could have at the same time.#i wish i didn't look so young and everyone would stop asking how old I am. i don't think they're supposed to do that beyond verifying that#I'm old enough to work. but they all do. and I'm too scared of being unappealing to give a non answer.#i think that's part of the problem too. I feel like people are taking advantage of me being young and stupid and that's why I'm only#getting the shitty offers that I am. like if I was 40 or something maybe they wouldn't be trying to take advantage of me as much#but that's probably also wishful thinking. corporate world doesn't care about anyone doesn't matter what age#i feel trapped but I also feel a little tricked too. because I did everything I was supposed to i do things people expect. it's not working#i got a college degree with a great gpa. i talk up transferable skills. i go places I've applied to and talk to people. i dress nicely and#i show up early with time built in to stay longer if the interview goes over. i ask good questions. i apply and apply and apply#and nobody wants me. nobody is willing to give me enough to survive off of. almost nobody is willing to get back to me in a timely manner#i found out today that the county frequently takes a full year to hire library pages. wtf. a position that they say only requires a 10th#grade education. nothing fancy. part time. a full year to get hired or turned away from that. genuinely wtf.#im also angry because I know what job I want and I know the kind of job I need and I know being a librarian isn't gonna pay super well and#I made my peace with that fifteen years ago because it makes enough to live off of and that's good. it has a low burnout rate. it's#consistent. it's helping people. it's a place where you can make a difference and take a stand and learn and teach and aaaaa#and even though I've been working towards it for fifteen years I still can't get an entry level job or even a volunteer position and#at this rate I'll have a master's degree before I get in the field doing anything at all#but also I don't honestly think I'm going to get the in state tuition to afford it. they'll find some reason to deny me and then#i won't be able to get the degree and I'll just be defeated because I've given up so much to get out here and it's going to be worthless#it already feels ridiculous to be out here. i don't know anyone or anything or where i am and even the fucking traffic lights are different#i look like a fool every time I want to turn left. i feel like a fool every single day. everyone keeps saying I'll get a job soon but it's#been months and all the college kids are going to move back to the area and they'll need jobs too. the market is saturated with applicants
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kivino · 5 months
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BIG GUY || SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY X GN!READER
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my masterlist
ao3 link to this fic
Word counter – ~1,8k
Tags/Warnings – Fluff, a bit of miscommunication and jealousy, nothing much.
Summary – Ghost takes a liking to the nickname you give him, but struggles to understand just how much he likes it.
A/n – I’m still struggling with my school projects so wish me luck, I made this instead of making a video for my language class lmao, enjoy! i’ll add the ao3 link a bit later.
upd. link added for ao3 enjoyers!
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It didn't miss anybody, the way Ghost seemed more easygoing and light-hearted on certain days, letting recruits get away with a bit more than usual. Coincidentally, it was right after various interactions with you, be it training or sparring together, doing reports, moving some shit around the base, or just hanging out in the common room. Nobody could just figure out what it was about your interactions that lifted Simon’s spirits so high, which was notoriously hard, courtesy of how gloomy or menacing the man usually appeared. But the answer was quite simple, really.
“Thanks, big guy. Always a huge help.” Simon catches your small smile as you pat him on the shoulder and nods, barely containing his joy, he’d hate to make it too obvious. He was wearing a balaclava after all, and the smallest stretch of the fabric on his cheeks and around his mouth could easily give away how joy spread itself in his chest at the affectionate nickname.
Big guy. Big guy. Your big guy.
Nickname reserved only for him, exclusively from you. Of course, Ghost knew he’d be larger than your average soldier, and that regularly got acknowledged by others, but something about you calling him like this made it different. That pleasant warmth inside, which reminded him of the sun, or that stupid fluttering in his stomach, was…unusual to say the least. It made his mood better almost instantly, an interaction he eagerly, but silently looked forward to each day. Something about you calling him a big guy made his head spin, swimming in the endless clouds. Something Ghost hasn't felt in a long time and didn’t think he’d ever experience.
It was easy to let down his guard around you, you stripped him of the metaphorical armor just like this, with an effortless joke and that godforsaken pet name thrown in somewhere in the conversation. And just like that - Ghost’s low laugh rumbled in unison with yours, heart missing a beat when he looked into your eyes that sparkled with something unknown and captivating. It felt…good. New. And so fucking warm, Ghost felt like he was about to suffocate.
You were the newbie, your reputation preceded you but Ghost didn’t pay much attention to all the rumors swirling around on the base, like some suspicious soup in a boiling pot. He had better things to do. Like following you similarly to a lost puppy, maybe staring intently right at you with his huge brown eyes, if he was feeling brave. Or lingering somewhere around, just to make sure you’re adjusting alright. After all, all of you soldiers have to look out for each other, right? Right. Definitely.
It felt good to finally be able to just laugh and play around with someone, who didn’t seem scared shitless by his presence, mask and, well…everything about him, that seemingly drove people away. Not that he didn’t understand the reasoning for that – quite on the contrary. But you were probably just built differently, drawn to the weird, unappealing, and scary. Maybe Ghost should feel lucky that you were like that. And truth be told, he did. He liked it and he liked you.
Ghost could only hope that he lightened up the things for you the way you did for him. To ask and dig deeper would probably be too much, Simon could still feel that caution and tremble at the mere thought of trying to grow closer to you and spend even more time together. Like he’ll put a curse on you the moment he decides to open up a bit more and show you at least some inner workings of his mind on a more intimate level than just some stupid puns, or gossip and discussions about the way you spent your day. Although they were certainly pleasant, with you giving him a subtle, understanding smile from across the table, while steam from your coffee mug made it seem so domestic and wholesome like Ghost was in a dream. So, Ghost kept what little distance he could, despite his wishes, and hoped that you take your time and be patient with him.
That is until he overheard something that startled him, to say the least.  
“Well, your jokes are a bit too much for me, big guy.” You say, letting out a clear, loud laugh, as you patted Soap’s chest. Scotsman straightened up almost immediately in front of you, a proud toothy smile beaming on his face. Now Ghost felt like he just got punched in the gut, for some reason. Annoyed and on edge in a split second. But why? He truly couldn’t seem to pin down the reason for the surge of anger and something bitter in his chest, bubbling right under his skin.
It was probably nothing worth his attention. Just something weird with his body, exhaustion from the training, muscle cramps...or whatever it could be. In any case, running headfirst into dissecting his mind for something so small and minuscule? Ridiculous, really. Completely unnecessary. Of course, Simon knew that both you and Johnny weren’t saints, two rascals more like, but he had no obvious reason to feel this bitter stinging inside of him, that slithered and slipped around, followed by tightening of his throat and bobbing of his Adam’s apple. He swallowed loudly, trying to wash down that gross aftertaste on his tongue hours after he saw that interaction. And the fact that he couldn’t get it out of his head was telling enough, that he was, in fact, bothered by something.
So, Simon decided to do what he did best. Bottle it up. But then it just kept sitting in his head, that nasty feeling still eating him from the inside out. It didn’t help that he started seeing you talking with Johnny more often, while Simon unintentionally avoided you, still buried deep in his thoughts and contemplations about what caused him to feel the way he did. Of course, he couldn’t help but eavesdrop. And there you were. Laughing with him. Calling him “big guy”. Again. This only caused Simon to become more cranky and unfriendly, taking his frustrations out on poor privates who’ve never ran so many laps in their entire lives.
The only people Ghost was outright cruel and merciless to were his enemies. He wasn’t the friendliest guy, of course, but everyone noticed when the lieutenant who usually would crack jokes and dumb puns at the expense of others at most suddenly started to get annoyed at smaller mistakes more, using harsher words and overall look like he was down in the dumps. Nobody dared to talk about the subject though, so Ghost was left terrorizing the privates and recruits, having lunches in his office and avoiding areas where he knew you’d be at certain times of the day from your long talks before. Which, of course, didn’t help him to understand what was wrong at all.
So, all Ghost was left with were his own thoughts. He didn’t feel jealous of you interacting with other people before. You were never his, so he had no right for that at all. But there had to be something else that pushed Simon to where he was now, tired, unsatisfied, and craving at least a passing smile and a short “Hey there” from you. So that the two of you could sit down somewhere together, and you’d talk about some irrelevant nonsense, and then you’d open your mouth again and call him “big guy”. It didn’t feel fair that Johnny got to be called that. It was Simon’s nickname. From you. Wait-wait-wait, hold on a second.
The sudden revelation as to why exactly Ghost was feeling that way when he saw you talk with the sergeant hit him like a damn bus. Fuck, that is childish. Weird. God, Simon feels like a damn creep. Getting upset because of a damn nickname, way to fucking go, you oaf. This felt confusing. Irrational. Absolutely fucking stupid. To think that something that simple threw him off so easily. That’s human relationships for you. Now it felt like he needed even more time. Not to make it complicated. Not to hurt you and himself.
Regardless of his wishes, he didn’t have any more time to think when he was soon approached by you, a concerned frown adorning your face, along with a look full of sympathy and understanding. Ghost already dreaded the conversation that hadn’t even begun. And he wasn’t even the one reaching out first. Which makes it even more embarrassing.
“Hey, Simon. I have something I want to talk about with you.” You, bless your heart, probably thought something terrible happened in Simon's life when in reality he was just running away from you and his feelings like a whole wildfire was chasing him. The only correlation he could think of is dumb teenagers, which is…remotely fitting with his recent behavior. “I’ve noticed you’ve been kind of…avoiding me? Did something happen, or am I just overthinking everything?”
“It’s stupid, really. Nothing you should be worrying yourself about.” Ghost blurts out before he can even think. Great, now he can only tell you the whole truth, without the options to back out or lie. But it was truly so unusual for him because Simon never expected to get attached to a nickname and to you.
“Well, let’s hear you out. I won’t judge.” Again, with your perfect reassuring smile and your calming presence. Simon lets out a deep sigh, his throat itching from what is about to ensue. He knew he was going to embarrass himself, but he just couldn’t bring himself to lie. Which would’ve been so much easier, instead of baring his true feelings in front of you.
“Well, your nickname for me…You know what I’m talking about.” Simon’s tone is deep and gruff as he tries to conceal that uncertainty in his voice. You appear to be listening attentively, your eyes trained on him, head slightly tilted to the side, which makes his heart melt. You give him a confident nod at the mention of the nickname, and Ghost continues. “I want you to call only me like that. And I mean, only me” He can see your eyebrow rising, your expression more teasing than questioning. There we go, now you’re going to mock him or laugh at him. Just perfect.
“Sure thing, big guy.” A shudder runs down Simon’s spine from your words, a sweet, saccharine feeling immediately blossoming in his chest. Oh, he had no words to describe how hard he missed it. All his worries lifted immediately. You didn’t find it weird. In fact, from what Ghost could tell by your satisfied expression, it was quite the opposite of the reaction Simon initially expected. Which was extremely relieving. He would hate to lose your intriguing relationship to the miscommunication of his own making. “Could’ve just said that you wanted it reserved just for you.”
Oh, it wasn’t just the nickname that did it to him. But it’s a bit too early to tell you that.
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ohdeerfully · 2 months
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hi! I have a request, I've never really done this before but I'll give it a shot. so my request is that Charlie is tasked by heaven to watch over a very special human soul via a device that is like a full 360 VR kind of setup and this soul just so happens to be Alastor's immortal wife (he didn't know she was) whom he thought had died with him during a bad event and wound up in heaven but she didn't and She stayed the same since the 1930s like her looks stayed the same and her love for Alastor stayed too she never once tried to move on even when her new friends in this time tried to get her a guy but she just refused still wearing the wedding ring her gave her
I hope it's not too much to ask it can be changed to whatever you see if you have full creative control over it!
thank you for your brain anon
theres a couple awkward POV shifts in the story and im super duper sorry about that D: im not good at those
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An Eternity
alastor x reader (angst) TW: reader is female, reader gets a lil drunk and drives but shes fine(i do not condone this pls dont drink and drive im so serious), yearning goes ouchie ):
join my discord!
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Alastor rarely, if ever, talked about his time alive. He saw it pointless; a waste of time and energy. How could it benefit him if somebody else knew his history? If anything, it would only open up weak points. And, being an Overlord, he couldn’t afford that.
The only hint of his past was a band on his finger that he never took off. Even after decades in Hell, nobody saw him without it.
People often asked, of course, because how in the Hell did the Radio Demon get hitched? Even in life, he was probably just as unusual and off putting. These questions were always met with a dismissive wave and a laugh, but anybody who knew him—which wasn’t many, truly—would recognize the strain in his voice as he brushed them off. Whatever the story was seemed to only grow more painful with time.
He was deep in thought, humming absently as he trailed through the hotel. He ended up meandering by Charlie’s room, which was cracked open. He took this as an invitation to let himself in, cheerfully grinning as he saw the girl sitting on the edge of her bed looking extremely confused.
“Hello, dear!” He announced himself, standing up straight and fixing his bowtie with one hand. “What does this afternoon have in store for the Princess of Hell?”
“Heyy, Al,” Charlie responded, still frowning at the contraption in her hand. It was a rather bulky thing; an unappealing piece of new technology, Alastor decided. Still, he loomed from behind Charlie with a curious bend in his neck. Her shoulders were stiff, and he couldn’t tell if it was from frustration with the thing in her hand or discomfort at him watching her. 
“What is that peculiar thing?” He finally asked, since Charlie made no attempt at explanation. She seemed too focused to really pay him any mind.
“Something Heaven gave me to watch some curious soul they can’t control,” She murmured, fiddling with a couple buttons and knobs. “They’ve got me doing some ridiculous things. I mean, some human soul shouldn’t even concern me. But, they promise these favors will help with my hotel.”
Alastor hummed in response. He of all demons would recognize a manipulation tactic when he saw one—convincing a powerful demon princess to do your chores and promising to help her desperate project in return seemed like something the angels would do. He didn’t care one way or another, as long as Charlie’s naivete didn’t get in the way of his own goals.
He took a few steps back when Charlie stood, seemingly finished with setting up the box. He grinned, amused, when she pulled it over her head. It wasn’t the most flattering thing, and pretty bulky on her face. She looked ridiculous, honestly.
“Modern technology,” He sighed dramatically, leaning down onto his cane as he continued to observe her. “Only getting uglier.”
Charlie didn’t respond to his comment, looking around at what Alastor saw as nothing. She played around with the settings again, and adjusted the straps on her head again, before looking around again. She let out a successful sounding “hell yes” before pulling a remote of sorts from her pocket. She pushed on a joystick.
“What are you doing?” Alastor asked plainly, the building curiosity finally becoming too much. “Why do you have a box on your head?”
“It’s like…” She began to explain, trying to think of how to make sense of it to him. “Like… imagine you were looking through the eyes of somebody else, but still standing in the same spot..?” Her voice tilted at the end, unsure of her explanation.
Yeah, no, Alastor had no clue. But he dismissed it as unnecessary, as he often did with any technology he couldn’t understand.
“I’m seeing… Earth, I guess,” Charlie explained more. “Following around this girl.”
Alastor was only partially listening, humming quietly to himself as he just observed. He wondered if he should just leave—nothing interesting was happening. He was curious to see what antics Heaven was pushing on the Princess of Hell, though.
“Wanna try?” Charlie offered, lifting the headset up away from her eyes. Alastor immediately scrunched his nose up and narrowed his eyes.
“And look as ridiculous as you? Hah! No thank you,” He sat down on a chair near the wall, leaning against the back of it. He threw one leg up over the other. Charlie shrugged in response, and pulled the contraption back down.
Alastor sat for a while, absently thinking about what he wanted to do later as he waited for something to happen.
“Oh! Hold on,” Charlie suddenly said, causing Alastor’s ears to straighten to attention as she reached up and pressed a button. A holographic projection appeared out of nowhere, manifesting through some strange magic. “Forgot I could do that. This is what I’m seeing in here.” 
Alastor stood and walked closer, leaning forward on his cane as he studied the projection. It seemed like some kind of bar. He mused at how different modern bars looked from the speakeasies he would frequent during his own life.
“What heavenly task are you doing in a bar?” He joked, trying to find something interesting in the projection. It just seemed like generic bar business. Loud, flirtatious women and boisterous, over confident men. That, at least, was the same from his day.
“Like I said earlier,” Charlie explained, looking around the room. The projection seemed to follow her movement, and Alastor recognized that he was basically seeing through her eyes. How curious. “There’s some… soul they lost control of. And they want me to report to them about her.”
Alastor was very curious to see what kind of soul broke from control of literal heaven. He watched rather intently, leaned forward against his cane to watch the projection.
Charlie turned another knob, and the sound of tacky pop music and loud chatter began to emanate from the bar scene. Alastor wasn’t a fan of newer music, but he was often forced to listen anyway in the hotel lobby.
“Is it possible to turn down that dreadful noise?” He complained to her, announcing his dissatisfaction.
“No. I need to be able to hear what the woman is saying,” Charlie answered stubbornly. Alastor’s microphone of a cane began to obnoxiously play a song of his choice for a moment in retaliation, but died down after a few moments. After all, Charlie ignored his attempt at aggravation, so there was no point in keeping it up.
Charlie looked around the bar, searching. Finally, her gaze settled on a fancier booth with half drawn curtains. From her angle, she could only see a woman. She looked frustrated.
“---get out of your shell! It’s about time you start talking to some guys for once,” Charlie caught the tail end of the woman’s statement. She was gesturing wildly around, exasperation evident in the jagged movements. “I’m sick of watching you pine for somebody who’s been gone for ages.”
“Ten years isn’t ages, Mechiele,” You drew your finger against the table, making shapes with the rim of water that the condensation from your glass left. Nearly a hundred years, more like, You commented to yourself. You never told anybody that you were an immortal being. Nobody believed you when you did, anyway.
You sat your cheek against the palm of your hand and lifted your gaze to your friend, who looked at you with a sharp frown. You shot her a weak smile. 
“Can you just drop it?” You asked, nearly pleading. You didn’t want to cry tonight, being a little tipsy—you were an emotional drunk. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself blabbering about a dead husband.
“Come on,” Mechiele said impatiently, pushing your pleas aside. “There’s so many hot guys in here, I bet one would just love to take a piece of work like you home and-”
“Mechiele.” You hoped your tone was enough to shut her up.
You should’ve known better, honestly. Mechiele was already abrasive when she was sober, but with the amount of drinks she’s had tonight…
“No, no, no! You bum! Get your ass up right now and get out there! And take that ring off while you’re at it!”
Mechiele quickly lunged at you, a much too playful look in her eye considering how pissed you were right now. You yanked your arm away from her grasp, cupping your hand protectively with the other, shielding the golden band on your finger from her.
“Fucking drop it!” You snapped at her, standing from your seat. “I’m going home. You’re too drunk. I’ll drive.”
“You’re so fucking lame,” Mechiele droned, falling back into her seat. She wouldn’t budge when you urged her to stand and come with you. “He’s fuckin’ dead! Get a new man, already! Alastor’s not-”
Mechiele stopped abruptly when you smacked her. It wasn’t an incredibly hard smack or anything, barely enough to leave a red bloom on her cheek, but it was enough. She looked at you through narrowed eyes. You returned the same expression.
You left the booth and stormed off, cursing under your breath about it all. About Mechiele, about this stupid bar, about the tipsy feeling in your head, about Alastor—
You folded your arms together as you briskly walked to your car, yelling in frustration at your heels and ripping them off your feet. The ground was a little wet and cold, but you didn’t care. After making it to your car, you threw yourself in an switched it on.
You thought for a few moments. You were lightheaded after a few drinks, but you really didn’t want to wait for a taxi. You’d probably be fine, yeah? Sure. Against your better judgment, you began to drive.
It was a long drive, but it gave you some time to think.
You missed him. You pined for him. Nearly every night was agony, missing the presence of the only man you’ve ever fallen in love with.
You cursed whatever higher power there was for making you this way—immortal. How cruel it was, to make you live forever to suffer this longing. You didn’t even notice when you ended up in your room, but you let yourself fall face first onto your bed, curling up into a ball.
Even more, you cursed yourself for ever falling in love. You should’ve known it would only lead to an endless torture of heartbreak. You would never love anybody the same; although, you don’t think you’d want to, even if you could.
You were born to suffer. To spend an eternity in life without him.
Charlie continued to watch in shock for a few moments, her mouth dropped at the mention of the Radio Demon’s name. The previously hidden woman stepped from the bar, a furious look in her eyes as she stormed away. Mechiele was left with stubbornly folded arms and an empty glass of alcohol.
“Heyyy, uh, Al, how common is your name..? Do you know…” Charlie asked a bit awkwardly. She got no response. She lifted the headset, and realized he was gone. Even still, there seemed to be a lingering feeling of intense static, and the air somehow felt a bit heavier than before.
This had to be some cruel, sick joke, right? Heaven had to be toying with him, finally finding a way to torture his soul. His wife—she was dead. It had been nearly a hundred years since he died, and even if she had lived till she was old—
Alastor was pacing his room, ears pinned and eyes wide in frantic thought. Oh, how he yearned for her. He had managed for so long to push the memory of her away, to lock up his loss in a tight cage as he climbed the ranks of hell; it had all come rushing, barreling, torrenting back when he had seen her—or, no, somebody that looked like her—step out of those curtains. It was only a coincidence that that woman looked like his wife, and only a coincidence that she had a dead husband that shared his name.
His wife was in heaven, no doubt; which was where she belonged, of course, but Alastor had spent the last decade pining for somebody who he could never see again. If given the choice, Alastor wasn’t so sure himself if he was kind enough as to not tear her soul from Heaven and down to Hell by his side. Alternatively, even if Charlie’s idea of redemption were to work, Alastor was truly irredeemable. It was all wistful thinking, anyway.
Alastor’s claws dug into the curtains of his window, staring out into the streets of Hell in an attempt to concentrate on one steady stream of thought.
When billions of people touch the Earth, it’s only natural that coincidences like this rise. Right? He tried desperately to convince himself of different possibilities. It just made no sense.
A knocking at his door made Alastor’s grin curl in deadly malice. He really wasn’t in the mood.
He paced to his door, opened it just enough to fit his body in the frame, and glared down at Charlie. She was wringing her hands together nervously, and only seemed to grow more timid as the heavy, almost palpable ambience of his radio static filled the hallway she stood in.
“I’m busy,” Alastor said bluntly. His lips were curled in a sneer.
“I can tell,” Charlie responded. "I know you don't like talking about yourself-" She began to ramble on about him talking to her about his feelings and whatnot, but Alastor didn’t listen as he shut the door again.
Though, the interruption did give his mind a chance to slow. He sat on a chair in the corner of his room, and opted to fiddle with the radio on the drawer next to him. He tuned it—or, more just magically infused it—to play some jazz to try to keep his head level.
It would take some time to rebuild the dam that held back the memories of his wife. Even just the mere thought of her made him feel weak, and he hated it. The only soul he was capable of falling in love with—gone, forever.
Alastor never took the whole “eternity of damnation” thing seriously, considering the power he held and how comfortable he really was in Hell. However, when he remembered her—
Hell truly was torture. And he was cursed to spend his eternity in death without her.
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readerwithsalt · 1 year
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Sun and the Star Review: (With snippets from the book)
Since I just finished The Sun and the Star I’m just gonna say the first thing I have a problem with is the TELLING and NOT SHOWING.
• And I was wondering if anyone thought that they made Will super lame and ooc compared to previous cooler depictions of him. Like he’s supposed to be Super Chill under pressure and the Calm Dude but he’s so WHINY the entire book. He’s constantly complaining, judging, screaming, crying or sleeping. The cool, chill vibe Will had before is gone which was one of the things I liked about him before.
• someone else said ‘Tsats Will thinks there’s something wrong with Nico, something wrong with his personality. Will thinks Nico needs to be “fixed” and “healed” and so he can be “normal” and then Nico will be actually appealing to Will. Tsats Will may love some parts of Nico (or at least thinks he loves some parts of Nico). But there are more parts of Nico that Will finds unsavory or unnerving or scary or unsettling or unsatisfactory or unappealing’ I agree sadly
• Like he tells Nico in the beginning of the book that he’s just as capable of survival as Nico (which I snorted at cause no) and then is the hugest burden I’ve ever seen on a quest EVER in a riordan book. Like Nico tries to lift Will up every time he passes out from ‘lack of sun’ (which is so stupid btw) and Nico can’t lift him up cause he’s not strong enough so he’s constantly WAITING on Will. And it’s really boring to read about how every few seconds Nico has to turn around and let his boyfriend catch up.
I think Will’s character could have shined and been more likable in a completely different plot and quest.
Like, I thought since they weren’t giving Will any weapons that his strengths would lie in being the fast athletic character that didn’t need a magic item in order to show off…
• the whole ‘role reversal’ caretaker thing made Will look completely useless. Nico did 80 percent of the work and Will sadly fell flat. I thought he was coming along to keep Nico safe and to heal him when he got injured but Nico was pretty much doing almost every job. It was like he was riding Nico’s coattails to become a ‘hero’ and prove himself. But he didn’t really prove anything except that he complains a lot when things get rough.
They didn’t give Will a character weapon (even Piper has one and she doesn’t fight that much. Neither does Leo and he at least uses a hammer) they made him exhausted the whole book so he didn’t have his normal physical strength, his backstory was also pretty boring.
• and Will keeps randomly getting irritated at Nico bc Nicos irritated at him. Like?? Your shitting on his underworld home every chance you get. I’d be irritated too.
• in previous books he’s described as an archer. Even tho Leo calls him ‘the archer dude’ in TLH he suddenly doesn’t know how to use a bow AT ALL. He only said he wasn’t as good as his siblings not that he was complete shit at it. Previously he used a bow and had a dagger in BOO. Also will randomly says he never wanted to be a fighter and loved healing but in previous books he’s insecure about just that. Also the book forgets Will is a BATTLEFIELD MEDIC. Like he can fight and heal just like Apollo.
• Will whines constantly. And it’s grating and annoying to read. Either about the lack of sun (you knew what you were getting into dumbass) or the dead people walking around or about Nico’s horrible ‘darkness’ that he has to heal. It’s like he never thinks of Nicos feelings when he says stuff. And there little ‘fights’ end unsatisfactory.
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• The vibe of Camp-Half-Blood is nonexistent. It does not feel like camp at all. It feels like we’re in a 12 year olds fanfic mind. ALL of the campers are gone even though it’s been established MANY are orphans and we see no beloved background characters and background chaos that makes us smile like in the past books. It made me surprisingly more depressed than I thought it would.
• it’s also missing the mystique of a quest. Like going up to the big house to have the quest recited around a table full of cabin counselor demigods all fighting to be the third member to prove themself a hero (mostly the ares cabin) no matter how important a quest in pjo was for Percy Chiron ALWAYS enforced certain rules. Even if they broke later on.
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• Loose Ends. Reyna is. Not. Mentioned. Once. It never comes up how Nico feels about his big sister friend joining the hunters like his other one did even tho in BOO he tore apart a courtyard cause they took her. The girl whose shoulder he cried into, the girl who was with him during his last quest. The girl who thought of him as a little brother and tucked him in her cape and said he resembled his surname as he slept.
Hazel is mentioned… but it’s literally just a couple shallow mentions that don’t have anything to do with the fact that he may not ever see her again if he revisits Tartarus. He mentions his beloved little sister who was the actual first light in his life (don’t know why the book says Will is) in a long time only once and it’s because he can’t remember something and thinks Hazel would?? It’s weird that he iris messages Piper at the end instead of Hazel. I thought that’s what he was going to do and then it was just a big cringe fest of Piper shoved in at the end talking about the label of her sexuality?? Like we actually care??
And It’s never stated that Nico finds out where Jason is even though HE SHOULD KNOW. He literally talks to Beckendorf and Luke when they die in pjo to find out where they went but he can’t figure out where his best friend is??
Also at the end of the book it says Nico still hasn’t redecorated his cabin even though he told Jason he was going to a YEAR AGO bc the ‘decor was disgusting’ (I think that was the worst loose end not fixed 😂)
Every other relationship of Nicos is thrown away so he can admire Will Solace’s mediocrity. who’s kinda a loser in this tbh….
• The Percabeth scene was weird. What relevance does sally jackson have to Nico’s story? Why did he have to go all the way to Percy’s bedroom to iris message him?? And the fact he uses the ship name Percabeth to describe them (which he’d never done in previous books) proves a cringe fan is the one writing this.
The fact that they don’t OFFER TO HELP Nico is ooc of them. Bc even if Percy wants to chill at college he would never want Nico to clean up his mess without offering his help. Also the fact that Percy turns to Annabeth and says ‘oh man I forgot about him’ is like… WHAT?? And they just say oh yea if anyone can get through Tartarus it’s you two.
To Will who’s never been on a quest and doesn’t fight (at least in this book) that’s a weird thing to say. Percy and annabeth only survived bc they’ve fought together FOR YEARS. And bc of Percy’s big three power. It was just a forced add in cameo. Would’ve been better if they didn’t know till the end that Nico got Bob out and then they suddenly see Bob in an iris message and start crying or something…
• it broke my heart that Nico gave his SKULL RING to Will. The last gift from Bianca Nico ever got and he gives it to someone that doesn’t even appreciate his element.
And what does Nico get in return? A coin. I mean, an engraved coin but still. It’s kinda symbolic of the relationship. Nico giving Will something of such RELEVANCE to Nico’s character, something he’s always described with wearing and then Nico receiving a token in turn.
• Will asks Persephone how he’s SUPPOSED TO LOVE NICO. Like I almost blew up my house with me in it at that part. It never feels like Will is as attracted to Nico as Nico is to him. Nico instigates every kiss (which is ooc of him and his reservedness to touch). It seems Will likes to look at others a lot because one of Nicos insecurities were of him staring at fucking Paolo. While being right next to his boyfriend, Will checks out other people… Like Nico deserves so much better. He at least deserves respect.
I would’ve appreciated Nico and Ghost Jason way more than this shit. At least Jason described Nico better and they weren’t even dating. And I liked Solangelo before this. Will never describes physical attributes that he likes about Nico the same way Nico does about Will. Like Nicos inky dark eyes and baby bat winged hair, and his smile that is apparently like winter sun breaking through snow flurries, and his hair smelling pleasantly of rain against stone (I think Apollo is more attracted to Nico than Will is). But Nico has to call Will hot every five min.
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• Also I simply don’t understand the idea that Will being away from the sun would drain him to the point where he can’t keep up with NICO’S WALKING PACE within a couple hours. Like the super athletic, physically strong character that can lift Nico over his shoulders and run with him (and Rachel in TON) walks into the underworld and has to be healed by a stupid portable night light within five minutes.
• Don’t even get me started on his JUDGINESS. I always pictured Will as the guy at camp that thought Nicos powers were cool and stuff, right? And now he just judges every ‘dark’ thing nico does like darkness is synonymous with evil. And only his light can heal him. I HATED that trope and honestly thought they would make him more original. But I have to say it: he was so boring. Like in a way that made my stomach hurt.
• Wills kind of a jerk in this. Like it’s weird to read.
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• The PACING. It was off the whole book. The only part i enjoyed was the part where they didn’t know they were dreaming (that part got me) but that was it. But like gorgras scene keeps overlapping with the rest of the story and I kept forgetting my place. The fact that riordan or oshiro or whatever 12 year old fan wrote this put the words FLASHBACK & DREAM SEQUENCE over the chapters gave it SERIOUS fanfic vibes. The pacing is simply not suspenseful enough for a place like Tartarus.
• And do NOT get me started on Tartarus. Okay I’ll say it anyway: it wasn’t scary AT ALL. LIKE ANY OTHER QUEST. Actually it seemed easier than other previous quests which is a big nope. Hades might as well have sent him to Target.
• And about the fact that is was HADES who gave him that prophecy is SO OOC of him. He loves Nico. Nico is probably Hades most favorite child ever as of right now and he sends him horrible nightmares, and a prophecy respouted 12 times to get him to save Bob (whom Hades could care less about btw) and go back to a place that he knows haunts Nico every day MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE!
Also HOW did hades give Rachel that prophecy? He has no power over the Oracle of Delphi.
• Maria and Bianca MAKE NO SENSE! How in the hell is there any piece of thier souls left when Hades gave Maria ancient rites and was the one soul Nico was not allowed to see and Bianca reincarnated. WHICH WAS FORGOTTEN BTW. NOW SHES BACK IN ELYSIUM?? Like?? Like maybe I could see Hades letting Nico see a piece of Maria but Bianca is literally GONE forever.
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Nico was ooc. Like not too badly but still bad. But the fact that Will didn’t let Nico shadow travel even once irks me. The fact Will didn’t let him summon Jules Albert irks me. The fact that Will kept brushing off nicos feeling about the underworld irks me. The fact that Will called Persephone the most beautiful PERSON he’d ever seen right in nicos face and then asked his (insecure) boyfriend if he was jealous irks me. The fact that Will is BORING AS FUCK irks me
• And the COMING OUT story. Horridly ooc. Nico shouting to the whole camp he’s gay and getting all the other kids to come out too is like??? and apparently he asked out Will before Will had even come out?? Nico would NEVER do that. Especially since not long before Cupid had done the same to him. And apparently Nico is like the first out character in a MODERN GREEK camp with DIONYSUS as a director. No.
In character Nico would’ve shadow traveled back to his cabin or the woods the moment he figured out what was happening.
• the nicknames are extremely cringe. Little ball of darkness is used to much and it made me itch. I think Will simply calling him babe or something would’ve been simpler and made them seem more like a real couple instead of a caricature of light and dark.
• ‘he’d always been the demigod who WOULDNT eat.’ ………..what the actual fuck is this. Nicos always been naturally skinny but being starved in jar is what messed up his hunger. Not that he WOULDNT eat. Why is everything always his fault in this book?
Like, he didn’t ‘LET’ himself get to the point of starvation over and over. I mean first of all he became homeless at ten years old, probably had to steal food items. And most recently he got KIDNAPPED by TWO GIANTS and starved forcibly. And then when he got out he was under so much stress of what just happened to him in Tartarus, the war with Gaea, his forced outing, and having to lug an enormous statue ACROSS THE WORLD. but nah, I guess he just LET all of that stuff happen to him
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• the references are BAD. Out of touch bad. Unfunny and the joke never becomes a joke. It’s never explained how a kid from the 1930s knows how to use the internet and look up lil nas x in a camp that doesn’t use any technology. Doesn’t explain how Nico knows about Care Bear powers (I didn’t even know that) and the beginning scene with the Star Wars ‘joke’ set a weird tone for the book and wasn’t even funny.
• I hated the cocoa puff demons coming to live with Nico. Like I was fine they got created ig even tho it was weird and kinda dumb but the fact that Nico is so keen to have his worst memories and insecurities sleep in bed with him makes no sense once again. In character Nico would’ve burned them with hellfire.
• Also Nyx is a unfathomably weak villain. A PRIMORDIAL GODDESS that even ZEUS fears is taken down in two seconds. Also she’s just trying to get Nico ‘accept his darkness’. WHICH HE ALREADY HAS DONE. The moment he called himself The Ghost King in battle of the labyrinth at eleven years is when he truly accepted his powers and who he was. So… why is she even in the book in the first place??
• Also Will STILL insists it’s Nicos fault he wasn’t accepted. And that it was all in his head….
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Also Micheal Yew was simply never mentioned again. Neither was lee fletcher. If they were I missed it.
There were a COUPLE of cute parts and lines but really this is simply too weird (and bad) to be canon to me. This book is just not canon. I see it as fanfiction from a random author that riordan probably let write the entire book or at least most of it. I think sadly riordan put his name on this for money and for fanservice because the writing is first draft material.
(And it kind of feels like they got this version of Nico and Will from cringy meme posts about them. Like, you know the ones where Nico’s all like ‘I am darkness, i am a vampire’ and Wills all like ‘come on, my uwu baby, no more shadowtravel for you, doctors orders~’ 🤣😭)
just because they thought that’s what the twelve year olds wanted and not realizing that a lot of those posts are simply made as a joke and not actually taken seriously in canon…. And that most people in the fandom thinks those are bad cringeposts
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somewhere-in-wales · 2 months
Text
What if, in this moment, Aziraphale & Crowley found themselves unexpectedly transported to our world?
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And then met these two idiots?
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And they all had to work together to get Aziraphale & Crowley back?
I wrote a fic about it (When Worlds Collide). Here are some nice things people wrote underneath its chapters:
"I can't tell you how much I'm in love with this fic. Like I want to marry it, right now! The amounts of times I literally shrieked with laughter reading this. I had to stop to wipe my eyes, I am dying"
"In love w this actually. the SHENANIGANS!!!! this was a joy to read"
"this fic is eating me alive. an immediate cult classic. if i had your permission and any ability to execute this at all, i would bind this fic in leather and carry it with me all my days like a spiritual nomad with their dearest tome. You Are Taking Me There."
"JFJDJDJDJFJFKDUSHCMCKCD I NEED TO GO TO BED BUT THIS FIC IS SO GOOD"
"Oh, Chapter 4 is my favorite so far. And that's saying a lot, because every time I read a new one I think 'there's no way this can be topped...it's too good, too funny, too fresh a take on these characters"
You can find it on AO3 here When World's Collide, there's an exert below, and if you're feeling generous enough to do a little signal boost re-blog, I will love you forever.
"Terribly sorry, but I wonder if I might help settle this business about whether we are who we say we are?"
Michael and David exchange glances.
"I doubt it" says Michael, reaching around the door frame for his water bottle whilst stepping out of the bathroom to take a swig. Aziraphale sweeps his hand in an arc as Michael puts the bottle to his lips, glugging. He immediately coughs and spits red wine forcefully across the room.
“Holy shit!” Exclaims David, jumping backwards to avoid being splashed.
"What the Hell was that for?" Michael splutters angrily, wiping his mouth, eyes moving between Aziraphale and Crowley
"Did you swap that out when I was filming?" he asks, irritably, looking around at the mess. "You've completely ruined the costume."
"I do hate to see it ruined," Aziraphale worries, glancing at Crowley who mock pouts. "No harm done to the furnishings at least" he says, as the stains miraculously disappear. He turns to Crowley again, appealing.
"Yes, fine" responds the Demon, getting up dramatically. He eyes Michael, who's still agitated, and feels like someone is looking into his soul. The gaze of an actual Demon, not just his acting partner, is enough to stifle any remaining irritation. With his eyes fixed on Michael, Crowley lifts his hand to click his fingers, and removes the stains from the actor's costume completely. Michael looks wordlessly at where the stain was, and raises his gaze appealingly to David.
"It's not... they can't... this is ...." he tails off, walking over to the table and sitting down.
Crowley sweeps his eyes over David's features "he's Aziraphale?" he asks, a depth of skepticism to his tone, "this guy?"
"Yes", says David "he's lovely really" Aziraphale side-eyes David before flitting his gaze to Crowley.
"And you're me?" Crowley asks slowly, with equal depth.
"Y...yes" says David with rather less confidence. Even underneath the dark glasses, he can tell the Demon is searching his eyes. "I might just take the contacts out" he says, to no one in particular, and ducks back into the bathroom.
"They'll need our costumes back. Where are you two going to sleep tonight?" Michael asks.
"Oh I don't sleep" Aziraphale shakes his head as though he's been offered an unappealing appetiser.
"I do"
"We'll get you a hotel room" says Michael. Aziraphale and Crowley exchange glances and Michael resists the urge to settle their discomfort by saying they'll get two. This situation is ridiculous, but he'll be damned if he isn't going to have a little fun with it.
"Thank you" Aziraphale offers, politely.
The door to the bathroom opens and David comes out, eyes back to normal. Crowley looks him over, flicking his eyes to Aziraphale, gauging the Angel's reaction. Aziraphale stares at David's face, breathing slowly, mind retracing memories long gone, but never forgotten.
"We better go then" Crowley huffs.
"Not dressed like that" David gestures to Aziraphale, who looks down at his clothes fondly, smoothing down his jacket.
"I have standards, you know?" He says.
"He's not wrong" Crowley agrees.
Michael, who had been watching Aziraphale's reactions thoughtfully, taking mental notes, speaks up "if we go in pairs and break up leaving, it's possible that no one will notice two David and Michael's leaving."
David looks uncertain.
"Unless you have a better idea?" Michael asks, "One, single, better idea?" Crowley and Aziraphale both flick their heads to look at Michael in recognition.
"No, let's do that" David relents. "I'm going to change." He steps back into the bathroom.
"Me too" says Michael, heading for the door "I'll be back in 5 minutes."
A few minutes later, Michael returns in the outfit he arrived in that day, to the general disdain of Aziraphale.
"Do you still think we should come to an arrangement?" Asks Crowley, smiling at this turn of events.
"I can't wear that" Aziraphale gestures to Michael's clothes, completely failing to hide his disgust at the suggestion he should wear such an outfit.
"What's wrong with this?" Michael asks. He's wearing jeans and a shirt, nothing worthy of such disdain. His question is ignored.
"You have to, Angel" Crowley teases, just as the bathroom door opens and David enters in a bright purple jumper. Crowley looks at him, then back at Aziraphale, a panicked expression briefly flicks across his features. The Angel raises his eyebrows and puts his hands on his hips in a look that communicates 'your move'.
"Oh Hell no, that's not happening" the Demon states. Clicking his fingers, he changes Michael and Aziraphale into sharp suits, David and himself into slightly-less-tight-than-usual black jeans and a slim black shirt. "Take it or leave it" he says, glancing briefly at Aziraphale, who's eyes soften, and lips form a slight smile in thanks whilst he smooths down the well-fitting suit.
"Yes, much better" The Angel sighs.
"For you, maybe, I'd never turn up to work in this" Michael fiddles uncomfortably with the collar.
"You should dear, you look ...nice" Aziraphale says, moving over to Michael to smooth his collar. Michael frowns at the Angel, noting the back-handed compliment.
"The hotel's not far," says David. "I'll call for a car. I'll take Aziraphale." Aziraphale and Crowley exchange glances in silent resignation. "We should wait at least 10 minutes before you call for yours" he raises his eyebrows, a quick glance at Crowley. He reckons he has the easier job.
"So, I'll be pretending to be..." Aziraphale gestures to Michael.
"Michael" Michael looks unconvinced by this.
"Yes, I know, I just wondered if there's anything I should know about you?"
"Probably best if you just don't talk" Michael glances between Aziraphale and Crowley. But Aziraphale looks very uncomfortable at this suggestion.
"He's an actor" David tries to offer something that will help.
"Yes" Aziraphale responds in a tone that shows his patience is wearing thin.
"He lives in Wales" David tries again.
"Oh," Aziraphale smiles, a look of relief forming on his features "Oh lovely, I do love the Welsh Coast" he beams, looking at each of the other trailer occupants. "Yes, yes I think I can handle this" he nods, confidently, adjusting his cuffs.
David smiles back, broadly.
Michael and Crowley are less confident, their eyes meet with a knowing expression of concern.
Continued here
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talesofesther · 1 year
Text
find the beauty
Wednesday Addams x Reader
Summary: Wednesday is infatuated with you; in a snowy walk, she might just do something about it.
Requested by multiple anons for my Christmas Special event.
A/N: Soft Wednesday because I said so. Changed the requests just a tiny bit but hope y'all like it. Prompts used: 3, 8, 11, 13, 14, 19. So if you requested any of these together, this is for you. <3
Masterlist
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You were different than most people. When Wednesday said she liked thunderstorms, she would mostly receive weird looks and questions about why she'd like something so gloomy; but you saw beauty in the way the lightning painted the skies and the rain fell heavily against the windows. You told Wednesday you enjoyed the cold weather on your skin, and how there was poetry to wearing black in someone's honor.
Wednesday didn't do feelings. But she felt a lot for you.
Her infatuation with you was something undeniable, it made her think of her father making heart eyes for her mother, and sometimes it made her sick to her stomach. But the thought of living without this feeling was simply unappealing.
Maybe that's why, when the day started with snow falling nonstop from the sky, she asked you out. She didn't use the word date, but it had been on her mind when she put on her trenchcoat and walked to your dorm.
The school already had a thin layer of snow on its grounds; the trees were bare of leaves and the once stone path now created footprints over a white blanket as you walked by the garden.
"The snow is so pretty isn't it?" You asked mindlessly, turning your palm up and watching as snowflakes slowly collected on top of your glove.
"It's pleasant, yes," Wednesday answered, her gaze moving from you to the looming trees around her that had grown enough to form an archway for you to walk under.
"Oh hey, look," you jogged a little ways further, stopping under a lower branch that had something attached to it. Standing on your tiptoes, you shook off the snow that covered the little green leaves; "it's a small mistletoe."
Wednesday knew of the silly tradition, though it didn't stop her from walking the rest of the way to you. She came to a stop in front of you, her personal space mingling with yours.
"I wonder who put this here." You hummed, only then glancing down from the mistletoe hanging above you to notice Wednesday standing before you.
There was something about seeing her with an immensity of white around her that was enchanting; with her dark eyes and raven hair, she looked like a painting, like something out of a dream of yours.
And yet here she was, her eyes traveling up to yours in a tender blink, features as soft as you've ever seen them; her hair loose for once, falling in waves over her shoulders as her hands rested on the pockets of her coat; her lips with the ghost of a tilt to them that if you didn't know better, you'd say you were her dream as much as she's yours.
You glanced away from Wednesday then, eyes downcast as your cheeks turned pink under her gaze.
"Your cheeks are flushed, why?" There was a soft furrow to Wednesday's eyebrows as she asked, she could see tiny snowflakes clinging to your hair and even smaller ones settling on your eyelashes; they touched you with delicacy, all intimate and tender as some of the flakes melted on you. For some reason, Wednesday was envious of their privilege.
"It's uh- just the wind," you uttered the first little lie that came to your mind, because saying that she was the reason for the color on your cheeks seemed too much.
Wednesday closed her gloved hands into fists as she took in a breath. The air came out past her lips in a white puff, and she waited until it faded completely before taking a bold step closer.
There was a snowflake resting on your bottom lip, so small you didn't even feel it, but it was taunting Wednesday. If she tilted her head forward just a bit, her nose would be brushing yours. And why was that the only thing she could think about?
Your eyes finally found Wednesday's again when she stepped closer to you, so close you could see every speck of color on her lips, every little freckle over her nose and cheeks. Would she be mad if you leaned in just a tad further?
There was no telling who kissed who first, you just ended up meeting in the middle.
Wednesday kissed the snowflake away from your lips, claiming them as her own for good. One of her hands came up to your cheek, feeling your warmth underneath her palm as her lips moved against yours.
If a machine was to check your heartbeat right now, it would go crazy as the lines came in shambles. There was something addictive about Wednesday, about the way her hair touched your eyelashes when she turned or how she pulled away oh so slowly and opened her eyes even slower; that got you all warm and fuzzy even on the coldest day of the year.
You decided it was a privilege, to see her in this new light.
Wednesday's gaze was darting all over your face after she pulled away, casting over every little emotion on you.
She smiled something shy, all soft and intimate, taking a shot at vulnerability; a small tilt of her lips that barely showed her dimples.
You leaned in to touch your forehead with hers for a moment. It felt a lot like a promise.
And maybe that's why she took your hand on the way back to school.
⋆* ☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚
Thank you for reading this little story. Feedback and reblogs are very much appreciated. <3
Wednesday’s taglist: @heelaechan @imagine-reblog @gayestfeels26 @sakurarukas @bluetreecloud20 @the-night-owl-blr @imlike-so-gaydude @user284747 @dreifhraniquo29 @emeraldevan @witchyhs-blog @tobylikesfire @simp4nat @boobabietch @impossibleliv1031 @deadpool-in-a-snood @rainbow-love4ever @maria-403 @pompompuri @halleest
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genericpuff · 3 months
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Why is the art so unappealing in lore Olympus now Persephone looks like a highlighter and maybe it’s just me but the proportions like the fingers in arms are soul over the place I don’t think they used to be this bad. Am I just looking at it with nostalgia or am I crazy ?
Honestly, nostalgia does play a huge part in it, even to this day there are times I look back on old S1 panels and go-
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Actually here's a great example that literally just happened yesterday in the ULO Discord that nearly had me on the floor LOL This is from Episode 70:
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Like I didn't even believe that that was real until I was told what episode it was from and I was just. Astounded and flabbergasted. The over-shading of the blanket that just makes it look like a really bad edit. Insane.
And yeah, there are a lot of old panels that hit different now that the rose-colored glasses have been removed, crushed, and thrown into the trash compactor.
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I think that's why it makes it all the more amusing when people come into my inbox and ask me "wait, why did you like LO to begin with?? It's always been ugly as shit, I think you're just romanticizing it" because like... there's something to be said about art and subjectivity, even if something is ugly to one person doesn't mean it isn't beautiful to someone else. It's why I try not to be too mean towards the fans of this comic for still enjoying it, because while I definitely have strong opinions about how "LO has gotten worse" and what kind of following Rachel has cultivated (cough cough), there are also just as equally valid arguments that LO has never begin good to begin with that I can't necessarily disagree with now that I'm looking back on it with a more critical eye.
That said, there's tons of media that I enjoy that is objectively awful. Like y'all, you don't need to take my opinions about a dumb pink x blue fantasy romance comic seriously, I like Starfox Adventures-
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Like yeah it's a badly made rushed piece of shit that was developed right on the ass end of Rare's glory days and was really an original IP (Dinosaur Planet) that got Frankenstein'd into a Starfox game so it could "sell better" for Nintendo, but I don't give a fuck, I love Starfox Adventures and some day I wanna be in the top 10 speedrunner leaderboards for it, which I know doesn't mean much because no one is speedrunning Starfox, but I do and no one can take that away from me dammit-
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Anyways. Lore Olympus has, in many regards, always had "bad art". But "bad art" can and should still be enjoyed by those who find joy in it.
And in LO's case, the world it existed in when it launched was a lot smaller than it is now - more specifically, the world of Webtoons. We can look back and see how 'bad' LO looks and reads now because there are genuinely way better comics surrounding it. It was unique and refreshing and experimental back then... now it's just "that stupid blue and pink comic for horny teenagers".
In most cases I would consider that "cringing in hindsight" feeling a good thing because normally it means something has grown and that it seeming "bad" in hindsight would mean that it's outgrown itself and moved onto bigger things. But LO has the more unique problem of "its current stuff is shit and it's making us want the old stuff more, even if the old stuff wasn't good either". In that regard, LO is closer to being like Harry Potter. Remember when The Cursed Child came out at the height of Rowling being exposed for being a TERF and even people who liked Harry Potter didn't like The Cursed Child because it was just objectively worse overall (with or without Rowling's bullshit attached)? It made a lot of people go back and re-read / rewatch Harry Potter with a more objective lens and go "wait a minute guys, I think we only adored these books so much because we were 12 when we read them". Often times it's the good memories we have surrounding certain things that make us have the opinion about them that we do.
Of course, LO is definitely not as politically weaponized as Harry Potter is, so that's where that comparison ends. But my point is that LO is definitely in a situation where it's been riding off the same privileges it had back in 2018 - having an 'experimental' art style while also utilizing tropes and characters that were VERY popular at the time (remember that 2017-18 was when Tumblr was at its height of H x P "Hades was a chill accountant guy who wore socks and sandals and didn't cheat on his wife like Zeus did" fantasizing) - and thinks that those same tricks and tropes will still work today.
Because of this, the art in LO really, really hasn't aged well, even the stuff that we look back on fondly. But I think it's the panels that we specifically think of when remembering "old LO" - the ones that stuck in our memories the most - that are the ones that make us miss or just not care about the panels that don't look good (the panels that make people question why we ever liked it to begin with).
We liked it because of how it made us feel to look at panels like these-
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Those genuinely wonderful panels that we think back on the most don't exist separately from the bad panels, they exist in spite of them. Even if we can look back on panels like these and pick out problems in the lineart or the proportions or the color travelling outside of the lines, that can't and shouldn't change how those panels made us feel at some point or another. And that's why when people ask me "why were you even into LO in the first place" I don't have any one answer, because I can't fully explain how something made me feel to justify why it's good to someone who can see from the outside - without rose-colored glasses - that it evidently isn't. It's very much a "you had to be there" type of thing.
Unfortunately, nowadays even the 'best' LO panels in S3 still don't come close to what the S1 panels accomplished - because for many of us, the rose-colored glasses are gone, we can't appreciate the good among the bad because we know now how bad it truly is and so the good just feels like wasted attempts at trying to recreate something it can no longer be. It "came back wrong" so to speak.
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LO came back just regular. But our journey to resurrecting it changed us to such a degree that even its closest intimacies are now foreign to us. Sorry dude.
This is still probably one of my favorite panels out of the entirety of S3 for being as close to "old LO" as I've seen since S2, and even it feels like a mistake, an accident, how could a panel like this exist in S3 when so much of it is a dumpster fire? It's like a flower growing in the ruins of an apocalyptic wasteland.
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But wasn't that always the case? Isn't that 'always' what LO has been, since the very beginning? A poorly cobbled together mess of writing and panels that, every now and then, manages to leave an impression that makes you feel something? Did we ever truly know LO? Or have we just been relying entirely on an idea of it that we've built up in our heads that when it does do exactly what it's evidently always done (even if not made apparent until looking back on it in hindsight) we think it "came back wrong"?
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xfancyuu · 1 year
Text
~ hold your breath, love dive. [aemond targaryen]
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this is my first fanfic!!! this fic is also a repost, originally posted on 16th october 2022 on a different blog however i want all my work to be on this blog. reader is afab with she/her pronouns and has no appearance indicators. this fic has also been reformatted and edited, reposted on 7th april 2023.
premise: reader meets vhagar (my queen) [2,945 words]
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The betrothal between houses Targaryen and Bolton was a choice not many had seen coming. You especially, you had gone from a girl who was content with the fact your father would marry you off to some Lord, and you'd live a life, you weren't sure if it had been a happy one, but it would have certainly been a life. You knew Aemond Targaryen was unpredictable, unstable even. He chose to claim a dragon as a pre-teen, stable wasn't something you'd use to describe him. He was chaos personified, like waves in the sea, uncontrollable, and you weren't sure what your father thought he was getting out of the arrangement. (You knew what he was getting out of the arrangement: power and selling off his only daughter was clearly the only way he'd receive such notoriety.)
The arrangement wasn't as horrific as you originally thought it would be, Aemond had seemed pleasant company though you were always in public, always chaperoned, so the man could not spend time truly alone with you, while your father wanted to marry you did not have your own opinions or goals in life, he did not trust the man you were to marry fully. Nor did you. You knew the tales of the women his brother ruined the reputations of, while his dutiful wife had to put up with his antics. You never knew how a man behaved behind closed doors, your brothers were a prime example of this for you. A prince was just a man after all and men were much different to the ladies you had spent time around. Kings Landing was entirely different in general, the styles, the hair, the people even, it was far too busy and put you on edge far too much.
They were dragons, both in sigil and temperament, you had thought. Each member of the family was equally fiery and hard to read, comparing them to the creatures which set them apart so vastly was a correct comparison in your opinion. Being around them made you feel powerful, that nobody could cross you, but you knew much better that politics can change in an instant — Rhaenyra and Rhaenys were proof of that. It scared you, being in the dragons pit.
Your time is spent with Helaena, she is a few years older than you though you think she is wise beyond her years, often telling you about the things she dreams about and often times speaks in riddles though you find her company more entertaining than most people. She understands you on a level which others do not, and you think in another timeline you would not be marrying her brother and she would not be married to her own husband, you would still be friends or perhaps more.
She doesn't want you today though, she claims she's ill with a sickness which is contagious — you'd get sick to spend time with her, you consider her your only true friend in this place, though Helaena being the kind sweet soul she is would never allow you to give yourself a sickness on her behalf. Suddenly you're alone, the day grows boring, the library is unappealing, you can only walk around a garden — no matter the size of it, so many times without growing bored. Needlepoint is tedious, and you think you could not cope if your life was to be like this once you were married. The garden however is where you find him, alone. It's the first time you've spent time together alone, and your palms feel sticky, and your heart is beating out of your chest. You don't know how you'll survive within a marriage when you cannot speak to the man without wanting to run away due to shyness.
"You avoid me far too much," he's the first to speak, you doubt words could process from your brain to your mouth to do so, "Do I scare you that much?"
You do not want to answer at first — perhaps he's talking about his presence or rather the scars he could not help, but you're strong, you're from the North and Northern girls aren't typically timid nor shy, "Why would I do that my Prince?" you can see how it would consider it mocking, but the playful tone in your voice indicates your intent. "Am I too fast for you to catch?"
You doubt you've thrown him off guard, though maybe that's why he had chosen you, "Do you think you are fast enough to outrun a dragon?" he asks.
"I do not know, you see I've never met a dragon nor seen one to know how fast they can be... though I have no doubt I can outrun one" you're being cocky, or perhaps you're flirting, you do not know which one would be better though you seem to amuse the price in question.
"Would you like to see one?" you don't know if it's a euphemism or if he's being serious, perhaps he does have a sense of humour after all.
"Hmm... I'm not too sure they would take kindly to those who aren't of Valyrian blood, what if one tries to eat me... I've heard the tales of the dragon who resides on Dragonstone who eats its own kind and humans alike." you're teasing him, who wouldn't want to see a dragon? You'd encounter them eventually, you surmised, it was hard to live in a family with such beasts without doing so.
"You know of the Cannibal?" his interest had piqued at that, your time with his sister had clearly come with advantages, learning more about the Targaryen family, the dragons owned (and not) by his family had interested him, next you'd surprise him by speaking Valyrian.
"Only what her grace, your sister, had told me about it, that apparently the dragon is older than Balerion the black dread — though it seems unrealistic and hearsay, your father rode him once did he not? Balerion I mean, —" your sentence was cut short by the prince, who was seemingly not paying attention to you, it was awkward for a few seconds before he excused himself.
Aemond had seemingly looked off to the side, as if being summoned though you didn't pay it much mind, the two of you were having an enjoyable conversation (well in your personal opinion, the prince may have just been conversing due to the fact his family didn't want the arrangement to sour due to his or your behaviours). Though, he had pulled away at seemingly the last second, muttering an apology and leaving you in the garden alone.
As fast as he'd disturbed your peace, he disappears almost as abruptly, almost making you wonder if you'd spoken out of turn and offended him somehow. And you could not help but notice how much lonelier you had become without his presence.
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Some days had passed and the interaction with Aemond had lived within your head, when you weren't needed or doing something you'd thought back to the conversation, he was a seemingly lovely match and paid attention to you. Not that you could say the same for your parents, they hadn't known where you were or what you were doing most of the time, they only lectured you into behaving around the royal family, ladies do not laugh loudly, ladies do not spend more time daydreaming than needlepoint and ladies certainly do not frolic around the gardens unchaperoned. Helaena hadn't miraculously recovered, which meant your family continued to lecture you. Perhaps they were more irritated about the fact you weren't strengthening the bond of both families to ensure the marriage, as your mother had kindly put it. You were aware your family wanted more power, but the possibility of you getting sick while they were heightening their station could not have occurred to them.
Your days continued to be as boring as ever without Helaena's company you were beyond restless, your parents had told you to behave far too many times, so much you could recite their speeches. Though it didn't stop you from wandering alone — again. You wouldn't be shocked if it got back to them — again. However, just as the last time you were alone, Aemond Targaryen once again approaches you. Cockily as ever, though being a Prince of the Seven Kingdoms and having the largest dragon could perhaps have that effect on one's self-confidence.
"Lady Bolton, you are the exact person I was looking for," he once again spoke, he often left you speechless, from his undeniable beauty to the confidence he exuded — you had found out he wasn't always this way, gaining Vhagar had changed him, and you surmised it was most likely for the better. "If you can recall we spoke about dragons and I have reconsidered the terms of our arrangement."
This made your blood go cold, you were certain you had not offended the Prince, though with the way he'd looked at you during meal times you could see how speaking about the dragons which were an extension of his family could offend him. "Have you spoken to my father about this?" He wouldn't be happy, you knew him well enough to know that.
"You misunderstand me, my Lady," you were sure your heart would have stopped if it was not for the words he spoke, "I cannot marry you without being certain."
It was not a good conversation to be had, and you were almost panicking, and you were certain you saw a taunting glint within his eye, "I can assure you, our union would be fruitful, and you would be happy." You've been taught what it takes to be a wife from your mother, but she had never explained what it truly entailed, your words feel rehearsed and panicked and came out of your mouth far too fast.
"I cannot be happy without being certain that you could handle this life," you're not sure what he's talking about, you've handled court well, made friends, were well liked by most people, and before your mind drifted somewhere else to think of every single misdeed you'd done, he spoke again, "The dragons are loyal, they want to protect their riders, Vhagar especially so," there was something in his tone which told you, you were missing the context of this statement, "I would like you to meet her, hopefully she won't harm you."
You weren't sure what to think, on one hand seeing the marvellous and beautiful beast that she was, was a once in a lifetime opportunity, on the other hand you could be hurt, or worse. It was seemingly a deal breaker to Aemond, if you chose to say no he could easily break off the engagement without remorse, he's a man, they never face the repercussions of their own actions.
"When do you wish to plan this meeting?" you asked, you didn't fear much, and if a dragon harms you, burns you or eats you, you supposed there were worse, less dignified ways to have your life ended.
"I was heading there now and while you are unoccupied I had asked your father's permission," he can't say no to a prince, out of fear of offending, you knew that much.
"With the way some at court speak of you Aemond, I'm surprised you asked for permission," the playful tone in your voice was evident that you truly did not believe court gossip. "How could I ever say no to meeting the eldest dragon known to man? If she eats me it would be a happy day for me."
He finds you amusing, you can tell, he's poker-faced, but you can always tell by the subtle way his body moved closer to yours, "I hope she chooses not to, it would be a sad day. I'm afraid I would not know what to say to your father about the occasion, his only daughter, eaten by a dragon, how would he recover?"
"You don't know my father like I do, he'd spin some tale that I was courageous and chose to fight a dragon and paid for it with my life." You're divulging far too much about your personal family life now, you're giving him too much insight and unnecessary information which could be used against you in a moment's notice. "However, I am not going to let a dragon eat me today, my outfit simply will not allow it."
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The journey to the largest dragon currently roaming freely was not as daunting as you'd originally thought, the nervousness you were feeling in your stomach hadn't subsided. Though, you could almost feel the anticipation radiating off of Aemond. Perhaps he wanted a show, perhaps he wanted to see how you'd react to such a magnificent creature, or perhaps he wanted to see Vhagar burn you alive.
She was there, laying and looking lethargic, or maybe she was simply not wanting to live life any more, she was beyond the size you had imagined, though something about her looked gentle. She hadn't harmed Aemond when she was a child and this made you feel safer, along with her rider being there, maybe he'd calm her with his presence. "Are you bonded to her?"
"In what way?" Aemond asks, keeping you behind him while he spoke in Valyrian — words you couldn't understand but if you were to have children in the future you should take note to learn.
"Can you feel what she feels, can she always feel your presence? Does she know when you're in trouble?" The questions come from your mouth before you can stop them, "You're speaking to her right now, are you not? Are you telling her to be on her best behaviour?"
"Did you not know we're always on our best behaviour." His response had made you laugh, you couldn't help it, if it had came from any other person you would have believed it. "Do I amuse you?"
"Yes very much so," Vhagar is stirring now, being so big she looks heavy to even move her head properly, you'd fear her moving her body without injuring anybody within the surrounding area. "It's a good sign she hasn't eaten me yet, isn't it."
"Don't be fooled by her, she's cunning, but she favours the brave." he spoke.
"Would she consider me brave if I were to touch her?" You ask, already moving forward however Aemond hadn't chose to stop you, perhaps he thought you too foolish for your own good.
"Isn't that what we're here for? You're to meet her and she chooses if we marry." Now you knew the motive. There was so much more than what met the eye with Aemond and you'd do well to remember that.
Taking slow and steady steps towards Vhagar was the easy part, she had emitted heat, much like the dogs your father chose to keep around in the Dreadfort. It was hard to stay away from her, she was utterly captivating, and it did not stop you from placing a hand on her. You don't doubt that you looked like an ant to her, tiny and easy to destroy with one singular movement. However, she stayed in place, letting out what sounded like a sigh. It was a good sign for you to continue touching her, it's not at all what you had expected her to feel like, she had felt warm and inviting despite her intimidating appearance. She was like her rider in more ways than he'd ever let the world know.
"You weren't serious about her eating you, were you?" Aemond asks, while you're completely mesmerised by how big and docile she was, your hand still holding the dragon's warm scales while Aemond's presence was felt closely behind you.
"Seeing her up close, I fear I misjudged her," and you goes unsaid. "She seems lonely and I wish she had more company, do you keep her company often? When you're not at court?"
"I suppose I too would be lonely if I lost Balerion and Meraxes." He confesses, "But she is well taken care of, I can assure you."
"There are tales of you claiming her, that you were a child and the only one brave enough to go near her," the stories are fabricated most of the time, "That you lost the eye for the dragon, was it worth it?" you hadn't approached the topic of his long gone eye, though you fear you may have offended him when he does not speak straight away.
"A dragon is a great price for something so small as losing an eye" he spoke though you can tell there's melancholy within his tone, you were so close now, incredibly so, never had you been so close to a man. "It does not frighten you does it?"
"You lost an eye for a dragon, why would that frighten me, my prince?" it's a question he can't answer because he's the one who's finally speechless. "Are you fulfilled in the answer you so desperately sought from this encounter?"
"I think I have all the answers I need," he had pulled you away from Vhagar ever so gently, it was the softest you had ever felt the man, "I shall tell your father we shall be married as soon or as late as you wish to do so."
"When we are married will you let me fly with you?" the answer was unspoken, he'd take you to the ends of beyond the wall if you so much as wished it. Perhaps the marriage was the perfect match despite being arranged, he'd found somebody as equally obsessed with dragons as he'd once been.
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as stated before, this is a repost and not entirely a rewrite, just an edited version of mistakes i realised i made months ago. i hope y'all still enjoyed this. crossposted on ao3 under the name hedonism.
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liveontelevision · 28 days
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Hallo!!! I’d just like to say to start I ADORE your work! Especially with Lucifer, the way you depict him is SO refreshing you have no idea.. your work practically canon in my eyes I love it!!! You’re super awesome.
I did also notice that in your Lucifer works you talked about his more ‘unappealing’ traits, so-to-speak. Like his temper, his possessiveness, and especially his paranoia and panic.
I suffer with a paranoia disorder and some ptsd of my own, and it was really nice to have those traits made known, but not have them severely criticized, y’know?
I understand and agree that Lucifer would need a patient partner when it comes to these things, someone to stick around and be reassuring through it all; And while they can get frustrated, not criticize or even leave him for it; something I theorize may have been a reason for Lilith’s own departure.
But what if the reason for the reader’s patience is because of their own panic issues? Or their own temper?
Now to be fair, not sure how i’d exactly want it to go. It could be them comforting him when he panics, or Lucifer when they panic, or just a simple heart-to-heart about their combined struggle and the resilience that is forged because of that…
Like while their breath quickens, hands clutching into their thighs as their brain practically screams at them to calm down through all the mind-numbing internal noise; boiling tears stream down their face as they shiver within the darkness of an empty corridor. Perhaps Lucifer steps around, bearing witness to their storming off, getting a glimpse of the uglier side of their lover. The strange, uncomfortable, terrified side of them. But that isn’t what he sees, not at all. His gaze softens as he stares into their tear-blinded irises and carefully sits in front of them. He sees a person. A real, true human being.
(hahaaa got a bit too silly sorry xP)
All I know is that I think Lucifer, while also being equally concerned, would appreciate having someone who could understand what he’s going through; Well, as close as a sinner could get to understanding it, at least.
But what do you think? Would he act any different? I’d love to know ^^ ❤️
Thank you so much for getting into these details! After reading this I realized how much I connected my own mental struggles to what I write. So just seeing that you're about to relate to it as well made me feel really good :)
This was honestly a little hard for me, trying to get into this mindset. Even though it's not super motivated by Lucifer's character, I kinda needed to write this for myself honestly :') but still, I hope you enjoy this!
---
Comfort
CW: Descriptions of depression and panic attacks, flulff, angst
You were head of heels for Lucifer. And you’d do anything for him, that goes without saying, even if you do enjoy seeing his reaction to your devotion. You knew Lucifer as the king of Hell before anything else, so your first impression of him was obviously different from the Lucifer you know and love today. He was always portrayed in media as some suave, flirtatious, powerful being. No one dared talk negatively about him, his true authority being misinterpreted as pure malicious intent. But that didn’t stop the media from tearing Charlie apart. Why didn’t he defend his daughter then? In summary, Lucifer was known for two things; incredible power and little consideration for the actual ongoings of Hell, even with whatever his daughter was involved with. At first. His saving the hotel, defending Hell on extermination day, and encouraging his daughter, was the side of him that only a handful of trusted people could experience firsthand.
Luckily, you got to be one of those people. It’s easy to take his goofy exposure and temper and make it appear that he is an aloof king. But no one can handle being a hermit for centuries without having a different view on life. And being an outcast from his original realm? Being abandoned by his brothers? Even the most powerful demon couldn't experience that without it taking a mental toll. That was obvious. Comforting Lucifer would never be an easy task, even for someone who’s experienced exactly what he has. And who knows exactly how close Lillith was to him? Was she able to see him in this state? Was it another factor of himself that he chose to bury in fear of rejection and abandonment? It was a pitiful thought, but definitely not an impossible one.
Whether or not you truly understood Lucifer's past, you wanted to be there for him. It felt good to comfort such a powerful being, being an anchor for someone who has an absurd amount of baggage. But it’s not like you always knew what you were doing. You weren’t this perfectly healthy person who knew what to say all the time. When you first got together, you had your doubts about even having feelings for him. He was an icon, a celebrity, royalty. It was great he confided in you, but was his status clouding your judgment? Were you only enjoying the dominance you had over his emotional state because of who he was? Was your admiration misconstrued as love? It took a while for you to get over this mindset. The longer you were together, the less it became you constantly praising and fawning over him, the more it became being in love with your best friend.
You didn’t really bother to bring any of this up to him, the idea made you cringe. Would bringing up your doubts about the relationship only transfer those feelings to him as well? The moment passed, so there’s no need to get him worked up over nothing.
That’s a great example of how your mind works. You assumed that all these spiraling questions, that brought you to the brink of tears, just went away. That, because you realized how much you loved him and how much he loved you, that meant that you never needed to express these thoughts. Nothing could be done about it, those feelings were in the past. Why bring it up now?
There was also the question of how much you gave into the relationship. You gave Lucifer your all, gave him your heart and body, and yet you don’t feel comfortable enough to share your own suffering? You could've blamed Lucifer if you wanted. He should be supporting you the same way you support him. Or you could blame yourself. Obviously, if you wanted support you should feel comfortable asking for it. But why do you have to ask? Lucifer never asked for it. Why don’t you feel comfortable sharing your feelings? Your own trauma? What’s wrong with you?
That ended up being your downfall. Nothing ever just goes away. How could you constantly comfort Lucifer and push him to let out what he needs to, yet refuse to express anything that truly upset you? Demons are essentially immortal, these feelings couldn't be bottled up forever. But they can be bottled up until you break.
Lucifer had an especially rough day, he was looking forward to finding his sweetheart and venting about how shitty his meetings went and how Alastor pissed him off, along with some other daily struggles. That’s all it was; a daily vent session that helped him decompress. What he wasn’t realizing was how much that affected you. It wasn’t really his fault, or he wasn't doing it on purpose at least. You weren’t really the type to share your own struggles, you mentioned that to him once or twice. You felt that crying and letting it all out, venting about struggles that simply don’t need to be discussed, none of that really helped you when you were struggling. But today, you were struggling. 
“Ugh! That tacky son of a bitch made fun of my suit today, can you believe it? Like - I mean - C’mon! We basically wear the same things but in different colors, I don’t know what he’s on about. Oh, and I had to go to the Embassy today. Luckily I didn’t need to meet with anyone but I - “ As Lucifer started his long-winded complaints, he stripped himself of his boots, hat, and jacket, then approached you. You were lying in bed, which wouldn't exactly be strange if it were early in the morning or late at night, but it was nearly dinner time. You were wearing your usual pajamas and had been scrolling through your phone for who knows how long. Did you have anything to do today? You didn’t have time to think about that.
Lucifer placed a quick kiss on your forehead, then between words, one on each cheek, then a final, slightly lingering, kiss on your lips. He finally plopped down and laid perpendicular to your lounging body, laying his head in your lap and looking into the ceiling as he went on. You set your phone aside, that had been plugged in and turned on since late last night, leaving it hot to the touch in your hand. You had become numb to it at this point.
None of this seemed to really come off as an issue to you. Who doesn't have a day or two where they can't get out of bed? You were sure you’d be ready to get back to work the next day, so it’s not a problem. Plus, Lucifer was here! You could get some quality time in with him and convince yourself that you weren't wasting a whole day. He went on and on. Talking about the Embassy got him on the topic of Heaven, which led to him sharing a story of how his brothers weren’t supportive of a specific invention he was sharing. “It was really something, you know. If I could've just been accepted by them, if they supported me.. like you do! maybe things could've been different. Maybe - “ Plop. Lucifer flinched at the sudden drop of water that hit his cheek. He wiped it away before finally discovering its source.
You were crying. It was silent, and you were holding your breath to prevent it from turning you into a heaving, sobbing, mess. Lucifer was quick to sit up, seating himself on his knees as he tried to question your disposition. He was finally noticing your overall situation. You are in the same spot that he left you in this morning, wearing the same pajamas, scrolling through the same phone that never left the nightstand. He started to feel ashamed that he didn’t notice any of this sooner. You had shifted your gaze downwards, picking at your clawed fingers like you would your skin when you were alive. This is embarrassing. You don’t want him to see you this way, you look like a mess. You tried your best to keep tears from coming from your eyes, but the fact that Lucifer was sitting near you in absolute silence somehow made it worse. You hitched your breath, trying to control your emotions in any way, then let out a shaky exhale that made your body shrink.
The moment seemed to go on forever. It felt like his eyes were burning into you. You had to do something. Anything. “I’m okay! I’m okay, Luci. Sorry, J-Just a rough day. But it's over now! We can just relax now. Promise.” You quickly said, your voice raspy due to it being the first words you had spoken today. You shifted yourself over, pulling the blanket aside and patting the spot next to you. Lucifer didn’t know how to respond. He’s seen you like this before, everyone has rough days. And why would you lie to him? You could go to him for anything. You knew that, right? He reluctantly moved into the bed, holding his arm out to allow you to snuggle into his side, finally resting your head on the center of his chest. Your eyes looked vacantly towards the other side of the room, as your finger mindlessly traced the seems on the side of his shirt. A monotonous task that kept your mind on anything other than how you were feeling. Today was just one of those days where every little problem you’d encounter was tipping you over the edge, sending you into a spiraling mess.
He knew something was wrong. He didn’t push you away, you clearly needed the contact, but the warm spot that you created from staying in bed all day was apparent when he went in to hold you. Sure, he’s seen you like this before. But this was different. “Darling..? Erm.. Sorry, I didn’t get a chance to - I should’ve.. How was your day, love? Wanna.. talk about it?” He always struggled with words. It’d take him a while, but he’d always manage to get what he intended when he spoke. “Oh, um.. It was good.. My day was good. Didn’t do much, but that’s okay. Just a relaxation day I suppose.” Ah, relaxation. You’ve used that word before. He always wondered; How come relaxation never meant going to a spa or doing something legitimately soothing? Was laying in bed all day really what you considered relaxing?
“ I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you worry. Go on, you were talking about your brothers? What were you - “ Your diversion was immediately noticed. Before you could even finish your question, Lucifer had taken your chin and angled your head upward to look at him. It was a struggle for you to meet his eyes. You gulped, and no matter how much you wanted to pull away from his grasp, you didn’t. Tears were welling in your eyes the whole time, and even though your breath had calmed, you still seemed winded. “Please tell me what’s wrong. Please. Let me help.” It seemed like everything just fell into place. Lucifer finally picked up on things you never realized came from your insecurities and paranoia. And he wanted to fix it, not stop it, actually fix it. You hated how the idea of it surprised you. It shouldn't, of course, he’d do this for you.
“ I-I promise it’s nothing.. I’ve just been feeling off today, I just want to be close to you. That always helps.” You smiled up at him. No matter how forced, he returned your smile. “Well.. Do you think.. Talking would help?” You tensed up as he spoke, an obvious sensation to Lucifer since you laid suddenly uncomfortably on his chest. “Hun, you know that stuff really isn’t for me… I don’t benefit from that, I think. So don’t worry. Just - be here. For me? Can you do that?” You began to sound agitated. It wasn’t an aggressive plea, more like a plea for this conversation to be over. He wasn’t a huge fan of how you spoke, it came off as a sort of insult to him. Did you not think he could help you in the same way you did for him? He could try. He wanted to try.
He planted a small kiss on your forehead, then traced his hand up and down your back, feeling your tension melt as he did so. He pressed his cheek against the top of your head and picked up your hand in his. He traced your palm, running along the wrinkles and folds of your skin, then lightly grazed his claw up the length of each of your fingers. He sent a starfish motion across the entirety of your hand before finally interlacing your fingers. You stared at his movements the whole time, watching only for a moment before your eyes glazed over, leaving you in a sort of mindless state. He squeezed your hand after giving it attention, which brought you back to reality. Your eyes had continued to drip, leaving a few small specks of wetness on the part of his shirt that sat below your face. With the newfound grip he had on your hand, he pulled your still clasped hands up to his face, rubbing his cheek on the back of your hand before pressing gentle kisses across your knuckles. His eyes looked at you, half-lidded, with your hands still held to his lips.
Well, you weren't lying when you said being around him helped. Just the sight of him caring for you in this way, calmed your mood. You managed to accept that your actions today wernt like you. That something had taken over in your mind to keep you weighed down in your shared bed. “Thank you.” It barely came out as a whisper when you said it, bringing your clasped hands to your own lips and pressing a kiss on his own knuckles in response. “Of course, love. Anything for you. I mean it.” These actions weren't exactly new to the two of you, these were methods you occasionally used to help Lucifer fall asleep, or calm him down after a rough day. But he was using it on you. He had learned how to take care of you, by watching what you do. Noticing how you act on a daily basis and how that contrasts from the version of you he’s seeing right now. It was a subconscious transaction that you two had. But when you did notice it happening, you could hardly contain the mixed emotions you felt. Embarrassment, Pride, Love.. 
“ I mean it.” He repeated, snapping you from whatever state of mind you caught yourself in, “You know that, don’t you? You know I can help you, right? ” Now, this was new. He’s never questioned you like this. For some reason, it became difficult to respond. To admit that you knew he had your best interest in mind. “Tell me.” He wasn’t demanding, he seemed genuinely concerned as he spoke. Your cheeks flushed, feeling some sort of embarrassment. “Y-Yeah, I know.” You were quiet, still.
Lucifer didn’t seem completely convinced. “I’m sure you do. But can’t you just.. I want to know what goes on in your head.. If that makes sense. I don’t know, maybe I’m overthinking this - No, I want you to try and talk to me. Just try?” You almost scoffed, trying to play it off as some kind of joke. “It’s not important, I’m feeling better now, that’s what’s important.” 
That’s when he became agitated. He gently sat up, lifting you up with him. “No! It still matters. Tell me how you feel. Or - how you felt, I don’t know..! Talk to me. Please.” He had a tight grasp on your arms, almost shaking you as he spoke. You tried to calm down, you really did, but you felt forced into talking. Not in a negative manner, just in the way that your instinct to isolate yourself in this state was being challenged. You were physically reacting, tensing under his touch and lowering your eyes to the point he couldn't see them. You rubbed your hands against your thighs, trying to figure out what to say. It seemed like it took too long for you to respond. When you did it came out in the form of broken sobs, your hands moved from your thighs to your cheeks, running your forearm across your face to wipe tears. You broke.
You finally open up about your day. About how today, you felt like you didn't have any reason to get out of bed, how it felt okay to just rot there. You tried your best to describe what makes you this way, but you really weren't all that sure yourself. And despite how much Lucifer struggles with his own words, you were almost silent when it came to describing how you felt. He would nod his head and keep a calm composure, just like you do for him. It took everything in him to just hold you as tight as he could, to repeat I'm so sorry and it'll be okay and I love you so much. But that's not what you'd do at this moment, and he realized how much he'd hate that for himself. It’d feel disingenuous. You loved physical affections, even the slightest intimate moments were improved by a simple hand-holding, or just sitting close to Lucifer. And right now, you felt ashamed for wanting to push him away. But you didn't.
He cooed you, and pulled you in close, his arms engulfing your curled up body. He continued to rub your back, just like you’d do for him, and would ask if you needed anything multiple times, even if you politely rejected each time. Just to be safe. You let out a gross mixture of sobs and apologies, and possibly some things that you’d regret saying later, but the dam was broken at this point. After you had calmed down, he loosened his grasp to let you sit up, your body stiff from holding it in that position for so long. He was quick to create some tissues out of thin air and hand them to you, catching sight of your reddened eyes and nose, but he also made it a point to not stare at you. He’d turn his gaze to the floor, or to your hands, or he’d rest his head on top of yours. “So..? How are you doing?” He almost sounded nervous when he asked as if he might have messed up at some point. “I feel disgusting.” You said bluntly, your voice nasally due to your nose being so stuffed up. He chuckled and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “I told you this stuff doesn't work for me, I feel awful still.” A bittersweet smile hit his face, but you were still making it a point to keep your eyes away. “I know, love. But, I’m glad you did it. I’m.. well, I’m glad you’re talking to me - I know it was hard.. So.. thank you, I suppose. You did good.” His words were choppy as if he was still figuring out what he wanted to say. He said what he needed to though.
You let out an absolutely exhausted sigh and leaned back into his chest, bringing both of you back down onto the bed. After a bit more backrubbing and hums of affection, you finally lift your head to look up at him. He was absolutely glowing. The smile on his face brought you butterflies that you didn't realize could resurface after being with someone for so long. “You did so well~” He said in a low tone, keeping his eyes locked on yours, and keeping your head turned upwards by gently holding your chin. “W-Well, don’t say it like that.. Perv..” You let your suddenly dirtied mind blurt out a nervous response. “Hey, that one’s on you. I would never proposition a damsel in distress.” He tapped your nose, speaking in a theatrical voice, before meeting your lips in a much-needed kiss. “Love you.” You muttered into his lips, only to feel his smile form in response. His eyes weld with affection for you when he pulled away. “I love you.”
Even if you felt awful after your little outburst, the reality of laying in bed all day finally hit you with a burst of adrenaline. You weren’t able to sleep after that and Lucifer had no complaints about that. The rest of the night was spent doing silly little things, Lucifer demanded you do your nightly routine, insisting it would help your mood. He provided snacks, started a movie that you mentioned you wanted to see a while ago, and sat behind you as he either brushed your hair or spent the time to give you a thorough massage.
You were so proud of him. You always struggled alone when this kind of thing happened. And, although a little awkward, he was exactly what you needed him to be at that moment.
---
OMG LOOK AT MY LITTLE TAG LIST ILY GUYS:
( @vififofum @thornwolfy235 @tinywolfiegirl @chipper-chip @bat-boness @misfitgirlwrites @nayomi247 @lonelynmisunderstood )
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em-mermaid · 2 months
Text
Gem wakes up during Secret Life and discovers something has changed (aka 1296 words of Gem/Pearl for @mcyt-yuri-week)
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The first thing Gem hears are muffled voices outside. They seem to be angry about something, or perhaps distressed? She definitely knows they are louder than normal. She groans at the noise, but it brings her closer to consciousness, curiosity poking its way through the haze of sleep.
When she opens her eyes, the world spins and her head throbs. Everything is too bright, too much, and she’s quick to squeeze her eyes closed again, desperate for the feeling to go away.
She waits and ever so slowly, the voices fade back in as the overwhelm of feelings fades out.
“Impulse, you let me in right now or I’ll make you regret it.” There is a seriousness behind the threat that makes Gem sure that whatever is happening is far more important than she can comprehend right now.
“C’mon Pearl,” he placates, and Gem can imagine his hands held up in near surrender. “Give her a few more minutes, she’s not even awake yet!”
Are they talking about her? What would be so important that Pearl would threaten Impulse of all people. They were getting along earlier, weren’t they?
Earlier.
Flashes of memories finally surface to her conscious mind. The Game. The cherry forest where she built a home with her Scotts. Her tasks and a trip to the nether.
An angry enderman.
The end portal.
She’s a yellow in the death Game because They had instructed her to open up the end portal. And now her friends are arguing outside her house.
Surely, this will be fine. She takes a breath and slowly opens her eyes. The world spins again in a burst of too bright color. The pink of her walls is near blinding and it swirls into the mahogany of her ceiling. It hurts. It’s almost too much, but she squints, determined to hold out until the colors stop melding together.
Pearl’s voice sounds distant now, beyond the intensity of the light. “If you don’t let me past in the next five seconds—”
“Ok fine, you can go in!” Impulse finally agrees, panic lacing his words. “But, before you do, you should really know—”
The door opens. It’s a quiet action, calm after all the arguing, but with it comes the sunlight. The greens of the grass and blue of a sword mixing with the ever growing cacophony of color. It’s too much.
She shuts her eyes again with a wince, an action Pearl seems to notice immediately.
“Gem?” She asks, urgent and confused. Why is Pearl confused? The door closes and there is a clatter of a sword, hastily set aside as Pearl rushes towards the bed. The mattress dips as she sits near her stomach. “Gem, are you alright? What happened?”
“‘s bright,” she manages to mumble before the headache spikes with the effort of the words. Pearl says something in acknowledgement and moves away, but Gem’s focus has already wandered towards taking stock of her body.
Her mouth is dry. Dry in a way she’s sure she has never experienced. It’s horrible the way her throat catches when she tries to swallow, but for some reason the thought of drinking water is incredibly unappealing. She licks her lips in an attempt to bring some moisture back. It doesn’t work.
The next thing she notices is that her body feels heavy, sluggish. One of her arms has gone numb, probably due to the way she was sleeping.
Pearl’s weight returns to the edge of the mattress and Gem groans, wrapping towards the warmth. There’s a small chuckle as Pearl begins tracing soothing circles along her not-numb arm. “Gem, you want to try and open your eyes again? I blocked off all the windows.”
This time she steadies herself, trying to mentally prepare for the spinning. She knows it might not work, but at least Pearl is here, grounding her with a gentle touch.
She opens her eyes.
Darkness, blacks and grays spiral in with the orange of a single torch. Faded denim pants and a familiar black sweater slowly take shape and lead her eyes upward towards Pearl’s face, her too-yellow eyes shining like beacons in the dark.
This time, though, it’s not too much.
Slowly, the overwhelm dims into the shadows, clearing her vision enough for Pearl’s expression to take shape. Her brows are pinched together in concern, lips pursed as her eyes flick back and forth, seemingly taking in the details of Gem’s face.
When their eyes finally meet, Pearl’s mouth twists into a hesitant, concerned smile. “There you are,” she sighs, and it sounds far too close to one of relief.
Gem wants to reach out, wants to soothe the lines from her forehead, wants to hold Pearl’s cheek and tell her that whatever is causing this stress can be solved, but she finds that her body is still too heavy from sleep to do so. Plus, whatever is worrying Pearl must be about her.
Sure, it’s not out of the ordinary for Pearl to fret over her when she’s not feeling well, but usually it looks like a bowl of soup and a silly story to keep her entertained while being stuck in bed. This though, this feels different. There is no silly glint in Pearl’s eyes, no teasing about how her hair looks like a bird's nest or how Pearl is awake before her for once. There is only an echo of an argument and urgency and a gentle hand on her arm.
So, she opens her still dry mouth and croaks out the only question she can put into words. “What’s wrong?”
Pearl lets out a hollow laugh and Gem can see the way it smooths down a small edge of her worry. “What do you mean, what’s wrong? I should be the one asking you that.”
“I’m just sick, it’s not the end of the world.”
“Just sick? Gem you were asleep for nearly a full day! I had no idea until Impulse messaged the entire chat!” Pearl exclaims, her eyes trail towards the left side of Gem’s face. “And now…”
“An entire day?”
“How does your arm feel?”
“Pearl, what?”
“Please, just trust me for a moment.” Pearl’s eyes are searching as she leans in to brush some hair from Gem’s face before cradling her cheek. The soothing circles return in the form of a thumb tracing along her cheekbone. “How does your left arm feel?”
“It’s…” She hesitates. There is a pulsing sort of pressure that runs down from her shoulder to her fingertips. It’s an odd sensation, not quite the usual feeling of sleeping wrong against a limb. She tries to wiggle her fingers to no avail. “…numb. How did you know?”
“Try not to panic, okay?”
“Panic?” Gem questions, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “Why would I panic?”
Pearl only gestures for her to look.
Gem tilts her head, finally looking towards her arm. It’s still dark in the room and her arm blends into the shadows. Flicks of blues and purples dance across her skin and it’s only when she sees it contrasted next to Pearl’s pale hand that she realizes, it’s not just the shadows.
Her arm is as black as the void.
A strangled sort of shout breaks free from her lips and she tries to scramble up, away from a sight so unfamiliar. Her body is still heavy, but she manages to sit up enough to get a good look at the arm laying limp beside her.
The arm, no matter how unfamiliar, is still undeniably her own. It is the same size as her arm used to be, same short fingers, attached to the same shoulder.
It has to be a dream. Or maybe it’s a cruel prank. Why would her arm look like the void?
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reinvent-and-believe · 6 months
Note
Trick or Treat!!
57 Roy x Jamie :3
57. dating apps ☺️
11:21 p.m. lucky for you that’s exactly my type
Roy’s bored. It’s not like he just sits around answering messages from pictureless Grindr blokes, but he’s bored and he’s scrolling and he's horny and it’s not like a 25-year-old 5’10" toned vers bisexual sounds unappealing, necessarily, even if that’s all he’s got to go on.
11:23 p.m. What is?
11:23 p.m. your bio
Roy may have been a bit drunk when he set up his account the other night, so who the fuck knows. He flips to his profile and reads, “emotionally unavailable but I eat arse so there’s that.”
Right.
Roy Kent is not old, thank you very much, but in his day, you picked people up in a bar or at a party or after a match because fit, interested people tended to linger. Now there’s an app for that. Brave new fucking world.
He’d downloaded fucking bantr out of morbid curiosity, a few months after he broke things off with Keeley, and deleted it within 20 minutes. The problem with bantr is that the whole point is to make some deep, meaningful connection that’s based on more than just physical attraction. Roy already had that. He fucked it up. That’s the last thing he wants.
Grindr, though. That’s more his speed.
11:26 p.m. That so?
11:27 p.m. it is. everyone else on here just wants their dick sucked, man. where’s the creativity?
11:27 p.m. So it’s the creativity then, not the offer itself
11:28 p.m. listen mate, if you’re offering…
The photo suddenly gracing Roy’s phone has got to be the most perfect bum Roy’s ever seen, round and smooth and muscled and…yeah, Roy would fucking feast on that.
Wait.
Another picture comes through, another that shouldn’t be identifiable, no face, no visible tattoos, just a perfectly sculpted torso, left arm casually flexed with his hand cradled behind his neck. His right arm is strategically out of frame, other than the pretty, angular hand nicely framing a gorgeous cock straining against tight black pants.
Perfectly sculpted torso and casually flexed right arm and pretty, angular hand and gorgeous cock that all belong to Jamie Tartt.
There’s not the slightest sliver of doubt in his mind. Roy sculpted that body himself. It’s fucking Jamie, that perfect bicep from the new lifting routine, the tan from his trip to Brazil, the Orion’s Belt of freckles on his left pec.
Fuck.
11:33 p.m. speechless, yeah? you’re welcome
He should not fucking reply. He should close the app. Delete the conversation. Block Jamie’s profile. Delete his goddamn Grindr account.
11:35 p.m. You always this much of a cocky prick?
11:35 p.m. nah, way worse in person
11:35 p.m. you want it though, don’t ya?
11:36 p.m. can i see you?
Roy takes a breath. Don’t reply, close the app, delete the conversation, block the profile, delete the account. Lots of great options here.
Instead he takes a breath, pulls off his shirt, and snaps his own faceless torso picture. He glances at it just long enough to decide it’s good enough and sends it before he has time to think about it any harder.
He doesn’t know what outcome he’s hoping for here. Maybe Jamie isn’t as fucking deranged as Roy apparently is, maybe Jamie won’t immediately recognize some random hairy chest. Or maybe Jamie will know immediately, too. Maybe he’ll have the good fucking sense to do what Roy should have done and pretend this never happened.
Minute after agonizing minute ticks by, and Roy is a fucking idiot, why the fuck…
11:41 p.m. right
11:41 p.m. so you coming over now or do we have to wait til 4am?
Roy stares at the phone for a minute before typing a response, throwing his shirt back on, and grabbing his car keys.
11:42 p.m. On my way
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Text
Merry Christmas :
Warning : Explicit. Suggestive. Minors keep out.
Tumblr media
The Sinclair family had decided to throw their own little private party for Christmas, but Bo wasn’t in a good mood.
He hated Christmas.
It made him think back to all the years where Vince used to have all the good gifts and he was left with the damn coal in the sock or a beating when he was being bad. He knew he could always buy himself a gift now, but it wouldn’t be the same. Vince and Lester had offered him gifts, but they seemed rather…unappealing for some reason. Maybe it was all his years of no-gift tradition that had rendered him completely indifferent to the holiday. And while Lester and Vince had fun decorating the tree and cook dinner…He was bored. He sighed before his eyes landed on the mistletoe hanging at the door. Another old tradition he never really understood…
Why the fuck did people kiss underneath a plant ? Why have an excuse to make out ? If they wanted to kiss, they could just kiss and be done with it…But then, his eyes landed on the door leading downstairs to the basement. Then, his head started turning as a smirk slowly crept onto his face at the idea he just had. Maybe he could still have a good Christmas after all…?
He stood up and grabbed the mistletoe before looking back at Vince and Lester who were too busy with their own preparations to notice.
"M’gonna bring our ‘guest’ a plate." He said and the other Sinclair brothers nodded absentmindedly. If they knew what he intended to do ? They didn’t comment on it. Vince wordlessly gave him a plate of food and Bo grinned before shoving the mistletoe into his pocket.
"Thanks, Vinny. See ya later."
Bo opened the door and started getting down the stairs. Once he was out of view, Lester and Vinny looked at each other knowingly. Lester seemed ready to say something, but Vinny simply shook his head. He knew what Lester was about to say.
And no.
Better not to say anything and let Bo get his frustrations out his own way…
In the basement:
You heard his footsteps and recognised them immediately. You had learned to recognise their footsteps. Lester was rather light of his feet due to his constant runnin’ in the woods. Vinny was rather stealthy too, but not light. A few floorboards would sometimes creak under his weight when he brought you food or wanted to dress you up. Whereas Bo ? Bo wasn’t subtle. It wasn’t that he couldn’t be, it’s just that he didn’t see the need to. His footsteps were loud and heavy. And as sure and commanding as he was as a person. You whimpered and tried to back away into the darkest corner of the room you were trapped in. Lester and Vincent were alright. They weren’t really too demanding and they usually only wanted a conversation or a hug sometimes. But, Bo ? Bo was unpredictable and forceful and loved making you cry…
He stopped in the middle of the room and his eyes roamed around—seeking you out like you were a prey ready to be eaten alive.
Sometimes, you suspected that ever his brother were scared of him—but you never really had see anything to prove it. They just never talked about him during your alone time, and who could blame them ? He was more of a monster than you or them would ever admit…
"Come on, darls’. Get out. Get out. Wherever you are…" He taunted with a singsong voice—calling you with a damn smirk on his face—and you closed your eyes. You hoped that if you stayed curled up and silent, maybe he’d give up. But, you should have known better. A hand suddenly shot up towards you and Bo dragged you out by the scruff of your neck like a misbehaving kitten. "Ah ! Here you are, sweetheart ! Thought ya could jus’ hide away from me, huh ?"
You didn’t fight back. You knew better by now.
Last time you had tried to escape, Bo had tackled you to the ground before you could make as much as a few steps away from the house. He had then stripped away all of your privileges—including food—and you hadn’t eaten in two days.
He brought the plate of food to your nose—taunting you with the nice smell of warm and tasty food. Your eyes prickled with tears at the memory of Christmas dinners and gifts under the tree…You missed those days. And knowing that it would be your second Christmas away from home made you sick.
"Come on…Gimme a smile, pretty thing. And you’ll have the food Vinny cooked, eh ?" He brought the plate even further up your face, so much that you could almost taste it. And Bo’s eyes lit up like damn Christmas decorations as he saw you open you mouth and start eating out of the plate like a dog. You were so hungry, and the damn bastard hadn’t even bothered bringing you a plastic spoon…You were reduced to a state of complete submission and humiliation due to your own needs…Even their dog was surely better treated than that.
But, you were far from over with the stomach tornado of fucked up and gross…because then, Bo grinned as he brought up to view the mistletoe and your stomach twisted in disbelief and disgust at what you knew he was about to ask.
"How about a lil’ Christmas gift for me, pretty ?" His eyes showed only cruel taunting and you knew he was having the time of his life just messing with your head. "A lil’ kiss fer me, and I’ll let you celebrate Christmas with me and ma brothers upstairs…You’ll get to see the pretty snow and decorations and if you’re good enough ? I might even allow you back in your bedroom…"
You closed your eyes. A fucked up deal from a fucked up man.
But, you were ready to risk it all if it meant getting out of that dark, moldy and cockroach-infested basement. You had given up on the notions of dignity or self-respect long ago. Your head just knew one word now: survival.
"…No tongue." You finally conceded and Bo’s shit-eating grin grew bigger. He leaned in and slowly pressed his lips to yours. He closed his eyes and slowly moved his lips slowly and sensually against your dry and surely bruised ones. It almost took you by surprise how gentle he was being. Was it some type of reward for not fighting him on this ?
But, the kiss quickly took a new turn when Bo decided he wanted more…Suddenly, the fingers of the hand he was using to hold your jaw into place dug into your flesh as he forced your mouth open to thrust his tongue mercilessly into your welcoming warmth—wet and tentalizing. Your eyes widened and you started struggling. But, it was useless. All sounds of protest on your behalf were ignored or muffled as you tried to push him off. Your eyes were tearful and you couldn’t breathe properly due to his other hand wrapped around your throat and his thumb digging up the soft fleshy part underneath your jaw. You didn’t know what he was doing until you realised with horror that he was experimenting just how far his tongue could reach down your throat—his thumb pushed to the extreme underneath your chin. The incessant back and forth of his tongue making your dizzy and teary as you still tried to fight back.
After a few minutes, Bo finally released you and backed off, a cruel smirk playing on his lips as he looked at your red and abused lips with pride. He even swept his thumb over your sensitive lips. You would have whined if your throat hadn’t lost all ability to form sounds.
"Ssh…I know, baby. I know. M’sorry. But, I wouldn’t have gone so far if you weren’t so damn unfair." He must have seen the confusion in your eyes as he quickly explained. "You always play with Lester and Vinny more than me. You all seem to warm up to each other, and yet ya always gimme the fuckin’ cold shoulder. I shouldn’t be jealous, but come on, sweetheart ! Would it really be so damn difficult to be a lil’ sweeter with me too ?"
A single tear rolled down your cheek. What a joke…He wasn’t sorry—not one bit. He was just jealous. Pathetic…
"…Monster." The word was out before you could stop yourself and you knew here and then that you had just committed a terrible mistake by speaking up. His eyes lost all warmth and he was back to his cold facade as he sighed and shrugged.
"Fine. Have it your way." He stood up and you thought he was going to leave, but he instead closed the door. He then returned to you and stood before you with a nasty grin and his hands on his hips—expecting.
"Am still waitin’ on that kiss, baby…"
You didn’t understand. You had just given him a kiss…what was he…? Suddenly, a touch of colour caught your eye as your eyes laid on his waist and all colour was drained from your face…There was another mistletoe—well hidden in his pants. His smirk grew as realisation hit you. Your eyes widened and the shock and fear in your eyes made him chuckle as he started petting your head.
"…Merry Christmas, darlin’."
You looked up at him and your gritted your teeth as his grin was back and his eyes were dark and menacing.
Bo Sinclair. The man who made you hate Christmas.
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kateisprettyodd · 9 days
Text
Discussing Watcher again lmao
Okay, now that a couple of days have passed and emotions aren't running high anymore - I wanna talk about the situation, the backlash, their potential response and everything else once again (with somewhat of a refreshed POV lmao).
I haven't changed my mind about this move whatsoever since the moment I heard about it. I'm an international fan, and through the very kind Tumblr user who is organizing a subscription match-up between fans through Email - I think it was @prettyghoul- someone was thankfully willing to reach out to me and share their account. So the money issue isn't a problem for me, sure, but WAIT - the website isn't international, I don't know if it's gonna be made available in my 'insignificant' Eastern European country (lmao), so a whole slew of issues arise that aren't money related (but of course, someone else would be paying, so I can't really speak on that issue on that person's behalf).
Secondly, people who are defending Watcher on here and on other social media - I understand you, I get you, but to be perfectly honest some of you are cherry-picking the information you present and are somehow blind to their intentions, either on purpose or genuinely. I don't understand how people can't see that making this move is so incredibly selfish. That's the best and frankly only way to describe it. And no, it's not because creatives don't deserve to be paid for the work that they do, and it's not because we are ENTITLED to receiving free content on YouTube (which is the main narrative being pushed by defenders on here) - but it's because their ambitions do not line up with the audience-based shows they have been creating. They have incredible creative abilities and true passion for creating shows which are "much higher-quality than other YouTube shows" (simply not true but I digress), but nothing will ever change the fact that they started on YouTube, that their main audience was cultivated on YouTube, the place they have come to despise because of the limitations to THEIR creative work, such as appealing to advertisers and whatever else they mentioned in the video. This I can understand, YouTube's algorithm sucks and advertisers are also horrible, as well as the fact that 'unappealing' yet passionate shows don't do well - this can all take a hit on their creativity and their passion for YouTube. I understand. But they have to weigh these cons against the pros, and they clearly did a horrible job of that. YouTube allows them to increase their relatability and their marketability if you play by the rules, YouTube allows them to connect with other creators WHICH SOME OF THEIR SHOWS LITERALLY depend on, YouTube allows them things like the discover page and the trending page where new audiences can find your stuff once you expand your reach to appeal to different demographics and interest groups, YouTube Membership is a thing if you need income, whatever. I understand that they don't want to play by the rules, but if your audience is gone then who are you making these shows for??? When your main venture is paid, even if it is 'only' 5.99 a month (lmao again), other options where they can make revenue immediately close up, since they can't really justify them. Why does their Patreon still exist??? What was the purpose of PodWatcher??? How are shows like Are You Scared? and Too Many Spirits going to survive on a streamer, shows which are based on that exact YouTube vibe of low-production two dudes chilling and laughing. Why are they considering their shows TV-caliber? Puppet History and Mystery Files are certainly NOT TV-quality and they are the second- and third-most popular.
Which is what brings me to my next point - how this all seems Ghost Files and Travel Season centered. No one can convince me that most of their expenses are not going to these two shows right now. Ryan said it himself, a season of Ghost Files takes hundreds of thousands of dollars to make, which is fine and I commend him for that effort. I don't even have to tell you why Travel Season also may have cost them a lot of money - which is also fine and I understand the appeal of it. But why not try a different approach? A season of Ghost Files doesn't necessarily have to come out every year, they could space out their budget, spend time churning out Too Many Spirits and Are You Scared (also shows that perform quite well), update their Patreon to look more Mythical Society-esque, do a merch drop (I have seen so many people asking for box-sets of their shows, and I can guarantee people would have paid A LOT of money to get a Puppet History karaoke thing on Patreon or WHEREVER)... Just generally diversify their income??? And space out these GIANT, extremely expensive shows, generally pace themselves and take it easy?
Now, they won't be able to expand their reach EVEN IF they bring new personalities onto the streamer. No one new will hear about them, and if they do, why would they pay for something they've never heard of before? There is no algorithm to cater to the masses which recommends their videos to new people. People who were here from the BFU days are disilluisoned and probably won't pay. They legitimately sacrificed their audience for money to fuel their creative ambitions, but their creative ambitions don't have an outlet anymore.
TO BE CONTINUED as this is too long already
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suzukiblu · 7 months
Note
disappointed missing fearless
Cut for weird alien biology kinky porn but mostly just for length. Also, I don't know if there's an actual established ship name for Slobo/Kon but this is technically from a YJ polyam fic either way, so idk if it actually matters right now, hah.
Pretty sure I posted at least some of this excerpt before, but this SHOULD be the extended edition.
"The Boy Wonder just had to be our token straight," Kon grumbles, folding his arms. Which is whatever, fine, preferences are preferences and the dude's still his friend and he would still very literally die either for him or on his say-so, but is the idea of letting Kon go down on him every now and then and maybe also making out a little somewhere in there really that unappealing? Like, seriously? 
Bats are the freaking worst. 
"What's it matter?" Slobo asks, wrinkling his nose at him. 
"I mean, it doesn't matter-matter," Kon says with an exasperated sigh. "But also I just want to finally score some dick for once, man, and I still can't actually keep up with Bart's and Suzie only has one when she's in the right mood and Rob's isn't even into me, and I don't wanna go knock over a civilian for it, that's just–" 
"And that'd be all the options for dick currently available to your picky ass, yeah," Slobo cuts in dryly, leaning in towards him with a pointed look. Kon turns red. 
"Actually I kinda figured you were straight too," he says, glancing sidelong at the guy. "And very solidly monogamous, given all the time that you and Anita spend ignoring the rest of us in favor of rooms with doors that lock." 
"We ain't monogamous, she just don't like gettin' interrupted when she's in the mood. Though yeah, you're right about the straight thing," Slobo agrees with a dismissive shrug. "But also, look, I'm Czarnian. Which literally none of you bastiches are. And gonna be frank here, you and Anita got a lot more biological similarities to each other than Anita and a Czarnian chick would, so at this point I don't really give a shit what kind of hole I'm fraggin' so long as whoever it belongs to's got somethin' interestin' to say about the process." 
"Huh," Kon says, frowning to himself. "That literally never occurred to me as a thing that might be a thing, actually." 
"I mean, what, are you attracted to Branx and Bolovax Vikians and Karnans and Martians?" Slobo snorts dubiously. "Or frell, even Czarnians?" 
"Well, just the ones I like, but yeah," Kon says, a little puzzled by the question. They're all sentient species with free will and also he would absolutely let that one very specific Green Lantern just fucking step on him whenever the guy felt like it, so yeah, why wouldn't he be attracted to them? And . . . Kilowog, he's pretty sure said Green Lantern's name is? Kilowog's built like what a brick house wishes it could grow up and be. So Kon would definitely let him step on him. "Is that like . . . weird or something?" 
"Galactically speakin', yeah," Slobo says wryly. "Though I guess you're already a hybrid so I probably shoulda expected you to be less discriminatin' than the rest of the universe tends to." 
"So what, are you calling me a slut?" Kon snorts. "Like on a genetic level?" 
"Depends how many people you've screwed, galactically speakin'," Slobo says. 
"Not enough," Kon replies frankly. 
"Then yeah, pretty sure you're a slut," Slobo says with another shrug. "Especially if you miss dick bad enough to get in a snit on the couch over it." 
". . . I mean, okay, I haven't actually socialized with another dude's dick before," Kon admits grudgingly, making a face. "Unless watching gay porn counts, and to be honest I usually get bored if there's only one style of genitals onscreen so I don't do much of that. Just I just finally figured out that I fucking want dick and my options for getting it are frustratingly limited right now." 
"Then wanna actually socialize with mine?" Slobo suggests, which is an approach that Kon appreciates the straightforwardness of. "Seein' as it don't belong to a picky control freak or a hyperactive speedster or someone with a real fraggin' inconvenient tendency to turn intangible when they come." 
"Suzie does that?" Kon asks. 
"Accordin' to Anita," Slobo replies with a shrug. "And since I trust her with my literal fraggin' life at this point, I'm assumin' this ain't the thing she's picked to lie to me over." 
"Huh," Kon says. "Weird, but noted for future reference. And yeah, fuck it, let's socialize. Room with a lock, or . . . ?" 
"Naw, give Wonder Girl the chance to walk in on us, she wants to see your indestructible ass get wrecked real bad," Slobo says with a smirk, then sticks with that straightforward approach that Kon so rightly appreciates and immediately yanks his belt open and whips his dick out right there on the couch. It is not remotely proportionate to his build, and Kon definitely means that as a compliment. 
"Oh, is that the plan here?" Kon says, as someone whose mouth just went dry and who would also admittedly like to see his indestructible ass get wrecked for once. Like, that's a thing he'd like to get to do before he dies, that's all. 
"Damn right it is," Slobo says, smirking wider at him and giving his cock a meaningful squeeze. Kon glances down at it speculatively, wondering exactly how Czarnians fuck. Said cock is currently actively rising to the occasion, and also getting increasingly disproportionate to Slobo's build. 
Like. Very increasingly. 
Damn. 
"What'dya think? Wanna come on it, bastich?" Slobo asks with a leering grin and a very unsubtle tug. Kon flicks his eyes back to his face and just eyes him. 
. . . then he eyes his dick. 
It's actually, like, a very appealing dick. It might be a little smaller than Kon's own is, he thinks, but it's definitely comparable and still plenty damn big either way, all long and thick and heavy-looking, and it's got, like . . . ridges. Bumps. Textures. Like, Bad Dragon wishes it could design such a dick. 
. . . Jesus, actually, is that a knot at the base? And–
Oh. Okay. 
"Is your dick prehensile," Kon asks, officially just staring at it. 
It waves at him. 
"Is it?" Slobo asks with a smirk. 
"Fuck," Kon says as a downright vicious stab of arousal goes through his gut, and then he very suddenly feels very weird. Slobo cocks his head, looking surprised. 
Kon looks down at himself, because again, he feels weird. "Himself" is not there to be looked at. 
Well, like, it is. Just not in very . . . "him"-type fashion. 
"Huh," Kon says to the very nice pair of tits currently sitting all cute and perky under his S-shield. He blinks in absolute bemusement, and Slobo's expression lights up hungrily. 
"Shit, you really do like me, huh," he says, letting go of himself and reaching out to put his hands around Kon's suddenly very, very narrow waist. Like . . . way too far around, actually. That's . . . an experience. Wow. "Never had Kryptonian pussy before." 
Yeah, well, you're not the only one, Kon thinks only slightly hysterically.
"You can't get knocked up 'til you go through a full cycle, right, so can I stick it in raw?" Slobo asks like this is all just perfectly normal, which admittedly for all Kon knows about Slobo's life experience and alien biology in general it could in fact be. He thinks of several thousand reasons to say no, but given both who he is as a person and also how bad he really, really wants to finally score some dick for once . . .
"Yeah," he says, then half-reflexively flicks his eyes back down to Slobo's cock and licks his lips. Slobo grins. 
"Nice," he says. 
Anyway, Kon's suit lasts about five seconds after that. Which–it doesn't fit him quite right at the moment anyway, so it's whatever. It's very weird to see tits and ass and a statistically improbable amount of curves when he looks down at himself, but it's weirder feeling Slobo's hands and mouth roaming greedily all over said statistical improbabilities as the other pushes him down against the cushions. The prick hasn't even kissed him, which: rude much? 
Not that Kon's really complaining, because if he wanted "polite" that bad he wouldn't be socializing with Slobo at all, much less his dick, and Slobo is currently making his way down his body and clearly on a mission to kiss him somewhere. 
So yeah, the "weird" feelings are very rapidly losing out to the "holy shit, do that again" feelings. 
"Holy shit, do that again," Kon says. Slobo grins sharply up at him and then Kon meets his clit and his clit meets Slobo's very eager tongue and anyway Kon now officially and intimately understands why people who've got one bitch so damn much when a partner ignores it. Like wow, does he ever. "Ohhhhh my god. Oh my god oh my god oh my god–!" 
So that's pretty distracting, for at least a couple minutes there. 
Not that Kon's brain is in any condition to be noticing the passage of time right now. 
"Frag, you're already dripping. Wanna get off on my tongue a few times or just get straight to the main attraction?" Slobo asks as he hooks his hands around Kon's currently statistically improbable and also badly shaking thighs and licks his own very slick and shiny lips. Kon remembers the sight of the guy's big fat disproportionate dick very, very vividly, then immediately spreads his thighs as far as he can without the back of the couch interfering. 
Possibly he damages said back of the couch just a little bit in the process. 
Like, just barely. 
"Main attraction," he says firmly. Slobo grins at him again. 
"Damn, rolling out the red carpet here, ain't we," he says. "Gonna make a guy feel downright appreciated like this." 
"Put your dick in me right the fuck now or I will put you through the fucking wall, asshole," Kon threatens, and of course it's Slobo, so he just grins all the wider. 
"Fraggin' flirt," he says with obvious approval. 
Then he puts his dick in him. 
Kon's vision very literally whites out at the way Slobo feels sliding into him so big and hard and big and deep and big and good and he jerks up instinctively underneath him and makes some really, really undignified noises as his body seizes up. The couch might suffer a little more damage. Kon doesn't give the slightest bit of a fuck. 
"Holy shit, did you just fraggin' come?" Slobo asks in obvious delight. 
"Shut the fuck up," Kon barely gets out past the aftershocks making his whole damn body twitch and tremble under Slobo's, and Slobo laughs and sort of . . . rolls his hips, kind of, and Kon moans. 
"Shit, you're tight," Slobo says, sounding approving again, and this time in a way that makes Kon shudder even harder than he already is. "And soaked. Feels like I just stuck it in somebody's sloppy seconds. What do you think, bastich, want the whole thing in your snatch? Think you can take it?" 
"Yes," Kon chokes desperately, and Slobo does the only gentlemanly thing that Kon has ever seen him do, which is immediately just thrust into him balls deep. 
That is definitely a knot, yeah, Kon notes. 
And definitely Slobo's dick is prehensile. 
The literal only reason that Kon doesn't fucking scream is because they're in a building full of active superheroes and god fucking forbid somebody come and "save" him right now. Like, Cassie can watch if she really is into that, but if anybody in any way tries to fucking interrupt he is gonna straight up just become a supervillain. 
Unless it's a supervillain interrupting, he guesses, in which case he's just gonna take a page out of Wonder Woman's book and give them the Maxwell Lord special. 
Either way, he emphasizes deeply with Anita and her locked doors. 
Real deeply.
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finnitesimal · 7 months
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Ordem Paranormal Quarantena fucking knocked it out of the park it was insane Im grappling with so much I'm so insanely tired
There was a funny bit I was thinking of around the whole second bit where I was going Carol you hallmark protagonist fuck
Because first of all her name. that was the main part it's on the same level as Noel and Nick and Holly but there were also certain aspects of her character that in my delirious mind reminded me of the hypocrisy and drama of the typical independent business lady in a christmas movie as well as the I-can-do-no-wrong mindset of a romantic fantasy shoujo romance protagonist
And I thought. Man. There was a very clear path this story couldve taken with these characters and setting if it were not roleplay.
(note: not talking about the ccs or the actual characters but the Tropes the characters fall into and Could've been in generic science fiction horror)
A plucky new scientist with dreams to make a difference in an evil monster-ridden world and prove her skills despite being underestimated and looked down on by her friends and colleagues, and her direct senior with whom she has a negative relationship with due to his demonstrated lack of practical skill but mysterious higher connections to the board and therefore is ranked higher while she falls behind. She has moments of butting heads with him before the disaster breaks out in the facility and she has to struggle to stay alive and hidden until she's rescued by that same suddenly impressive senior with whom there's multiple tight spaces to be stuck with and convenient makeovers and sudden cold they have to share body warmth for. It's overWhelmingly easy to guess the plot
The plot in which None of the gang are mentioned. Because in this hypothetical B-list horror romance, they don't exist as people, but plot devices and tropes
They're there to provide funny moments and emotional weight as well as conflict to the overdone plot.
You have Luis, tank, everyman strongman with a soft heart and unclear but dangerous living conditions (poor). Probably the backup boyfriend in case the thing with Mikael doesn't work out, ends up sacrificing his life to save her due to some completely preventable situation cause she was too stubborn to listen, and gets a future project (maybe even a baby) named after him.
You have Jeffrey, funnyman, scapegoat, coward with zero friends and terrible priorities, multiple jobs (poor). Kind of useless, constantly infuriating and taking up space and meddling with things he doesn't know Anything about when she could've made a solution if he'd handed it over and dies to the zombies for the crime of irritating our protag.
Diego, hippie allegory, lives out of his backpack he literally calls his home, his life (poor) and has herbs (weedhead) that she'd try to be Fixing and eventually succeed in 'reforming' and sending him back to school due to her natural disposition in helping those in need.
You have Lucie, finally another girl, unfortunately in both horror and tropey romance, we Hate any other woman besides our all-powerful and beloved protagonist, so she's the nerd archetype but not the cute, efficient way our protag is nerdy but in the weirdo unnecessarily jargon-filled and Unappealing (unattractive) way. She dies the same way in the movie.
Benito was Made to be hated. It's the sly evil smirk and sunglasses and a beanie with the unprofessional labcoat and talking about things he doesn't understand like he does and taking her accomplishments and mocking her life as a scientist fighting to save the world and how he always seems to be looking down at her and definitely wouldve been the one to hide an infection and endanger the group he's the character whose death you're Meant to starting cheering for when he's dragged kicking and screaming onto the rusty laden, jagged roof and played with and pounced on till his insides squeeze out of him like toothpaste
Mattias was there so our protagonist could have her badass "I'm not like you I won't take a life because you're a coward" speech before he turns and nearly gets the group
Emi and Anderson were there so we could have a real man-to-man fatherly conversation about what it means to protect the ones you love and to pass on the torch as 'Leader' before he succumbs to the virus and begs to die before he hurts his girl, and so they could have wholesome pseudo-parenthood with a confused but reasonable child who absolutely understands that they're doing the right thing because they're the good guys and calls Carol mom when she's in danger near the end
It could've been a zombie survival plot about two arguably well-off individuals facing the consequences of a project they still believe could change the world and their tag-along group of meatshields to throw at the problem until their glorious melancholy escape where they're hailed as heroes for containing and eventually completing their groundbreaking research
and a horrific experience for a group of people who just wanted to make an easy few bucks till the next paycheck. They could've split those 50 dolalrs and jumped each other in the parking lot they didn't need to go through all that
Carol is driven, she's serious, she's ambitious and believes in the good that her research (the team's research) will bring and she's surrounded by people who don't understand that they're the good guys and are trying to find fault in her So she's willing to make sacrifices so she's willing to take it upon herself to decide who the team needs more she doesn't care if she dies as long as the world knows she saved it she needs to hear anything and everything people say in case it's about her or something she might care about it she's got braided hair and easily breakable glasses
Mikael is keeping things to himself to preserve his level of control over the situation because who knows what these guys are really like and he Saved them by telling them everything they need to know and they repay him by chopping his arm off? they're ungrateful and unserious So he kept himself safe while they had numbers and clues on their side They Managed Didn't They? Aren't they alive right now? they don't understand how important it is that he lives no one understands how important it is that Nidere lives he's got stylish curly hair and a fitted turtleneck
They both have a need to be heroes in a sense, to matter in the grand scheme of things they need to be at the forefront they need to be the ones who saved Everyone. Everybody is Only Alive because of THEM.
It's just really fascinating to me how. A different perspective of things kind of switches their roles as protagonists and cannon fodder
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