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surielstea · 15 hours

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In The Act

Based on this request.

Pairing: Modern!Azriel x Reader

Summary: In which Cassian catches Azriel and Reader who had been trying so hard to keep their relationship a secret.

Warnings: fluff | Az openly being a perv

2.6k words

"We've got to get ready Az," I murmur into his bare shoulder and he groans, pulling the sheets over our heads. I look up at him in the darkness of the blankets. "We're going to be late," I warn but he doesn't reply and rolls over, half of his body crushing me into the mattress.

"We should just stay here all day," He says, his voice still deeper than usual with the effects of sleep.

We were supposed to meet our friends for a late breakfast in less than half an hour but Azriel and I haven't even left the bed yet.

"Az, c'mon," I ran a hand through his hair, tussling it from his face while he rolled off of me, gripping my waist and taking me with him, forcing me on top of his chest.

"I'm not ready to stop being your boyfriend yet," He sighs and a smile tugs at my lips at the sentiment. "You don't have to stop, just don't mention it," I shrug, leaning forward and pressing a tender kiss to his lips which he returned with equal devotion.

We had been keeping our relationship secret from the rest of our friends for the past month, it had been only a week after I broke up with my previous boyfriend when Az and I got together— and though I trusted everyone in my friend group to keep me and Az a secret, I couldn't risk word getting out and being eternally slut shamed for the rest of my young adulthood.

"Just wait it out a few more weeks alright? Then I promise you can tell everyone I'm all yours," I hum with a cheeky smile, slowly dragging my hands up his arms and then around the nape of his neck so my chest was flush with his.

"All mine," He says with a look in his eyes that made my heart swell.

"But only if you get ready," I slide from his lap and off the bed, despite his protests.

"Gods, you're gorgeous in the mornings," He admires as he watches me stretch, his eyes particularly staring at the way my shirt lifts to expose the curve of my ass when I extend my arms upward. I yawn and take off the oversized tee, walking towards the closet in nothing but my underwear. "So gorgeous," He mumbles, mostly to himself so I pretend not to hear, but my soft smile remains.

I picked out a simple summer dress, a pale blue color with thin straps that accentuated my figure nicely. I turn to my boyfriend, looking at him, still sprawled out in the bedsheets unabashedly staring at me with so much adoration in his gaze. The warm blankets were welcoming enough, but with him in it, the bed might as well have been screaming my name.

I walk closer, closing the distance between me and the bedside. His eyes light up like he recognizes that I'm about to crawl back into bed, but instead of clambering over him, I lean down, my nose brushing his. "If you're not ready in the next ten minutes I'm revoking kisses for the rest of the week," I warn and his eyes widen a fraction, then they oddly relax.

"You couldn't keep that up if you tried," He says with a polished grin. I shrug and then begin to back away but he catches me by the back of my neck and keeps me close. "Wait I'll get ready, just give me a kiss," He immediately switches his tone and I can't help but give in, leaning down and pressing a kiss to his lips.

"Now do I need to help you get dressed or can you get ready by yourself?" I tease as soon as I pull away and he shakes his head, playfully pushing me away as I giggle.

The car ride had been silent for the most part, other than the music playing steadily from the radio and my botched singing. But Azriel didn't mind, just placed his hand on my thigh and continued driving with a soft hum emitting through his lips.

"You ready to ignore me all breakfast?" I say with a cheeky smile as he pulls into the parking lot.

"Don't remind me," He groans and I only laugh with a light-hearted attitude. He puts the car in park and looks at me with a pout.

"I appreciate you for being patient with me," I cup his face in my hands. "I promise I'll be so good to you tonight," I grin, leaning over the center console and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"I just want to look at your ass in public without Cassian calling me out," He mutters and I chuckle, giving him an amused grin.

"How romantic," I taunt, ghosting the words over his lips. "And, because I want to take you on dates," He argues.

"Oh, I'm sure," I say, my words laced with sarcasm.

"Swear it, I can't wait to take you to your favorite restaurants," He said, fingers dancing along my thigh. I wait for him to finish that sentence. "And so I can see you in those obnoxiously tight dresses."

"There he is." I grin.

He rolls his eyes and presses his lips to mine, soft and tender, a silent goodbye because he knows that for the next hour, he won't be able to stare at me with every chance he gets. "I'll go in first, alright?" I whisper softly against his lips and he nods, pulling away and slumping into his seat.

I open the car door and give him one last look before closing it behind me. We carpooled so often it had become routine to enter a place separately, either he or I would go in first, wait a few minutes, and then the other would enter so as to not raise suspicion.

On my way inside I spotted Cassian and Nesta approaching the entrance so I held the door open, greeting them with a smile. "Morning," Cassian wiggled his brows at me and I creased my own, confused at his awfully amused tone. I look to Nesta for answers but she offers none and only gives me a smirk, doubling my confusion.

I walk behind them, following them to a table where Rhys, Feyre, and Morrigan already sat chatting. They all looked up at us with wide smiles as we seated ourselves, leaving two empty chairs to the right of me.

"I love your dress," Morrigan said from my left side, pinching the fabric between her painted nails. I smile over at her.

"Thanks, Mor," I bump her shoulder.

"How do you look so good so early in the morning?" I ask and she beams.

"It takes hard work to look this magnificent," She fans herself and I chuckle.

"It seems to pay off—" I stop my next words when someone sits beside me. I turned my head to spot Azriel doing his best to ignore me, but he was awfully obvious with the way he inched his chair closer to mine whenever adjusting his position.

"Az I haven't seen you in forever, where have you been?" I tease him, deciding that this game would be a cruel kind of fun. He looks to me, clearly unamused. But the grin on my face is contagious and sooner or later I have a gentle smile coming to his features.

"Been busy with work," He shrugs. "Plus I've been talking to this new girl," He adds.

"Who?" Morrigan gasps, now entirely interested in the gossip.

"When can we meet her?" Feyre asks with an eager smile.

"Do you like her?" Rhys crosses his arms over his chest.

"Yes, and not anytime soon," He warns the golden brunette.

"Is she the one?" I impose as a mere taunt but he looks to me with utter seriousness and a lack of hesitance.

"I think so," He answers, and something about his voice was so very honest. It was hard not to crumble into his arms, hard not to press my lips against his and melt into his every crevice.

Cassian coughs and we all look at him in concern, dropping the subject of Azriel's new girlfriend, but the tall male only dismisses us with a wave of his hand as he drinks from his water. "Don't tell me the party started without me," A familiar cold voice stated and we all looked to Amren with cheerful smiles as Rhys said, "We wouldn't dare."

Halfway into eating our food Azriel had gotten a text. I was acutely aware of everything he did, so when he pulled out his phone to check the message and choked on his food I startled. The male rarely gave away any form of a reaction so when he jumped we all looked at him confused.

But he only looked at Cassian, then to me. He discreetly passed me the phone beneath the table and then continued eating.

The message had been from Cassian, and it was not words but an image, one of me and Azriel in his car, noses touched, staring at each other with a pure expression of love. The image rocked me. Not only because it had been revealed that Cassian knew, and most likely Nesta, too, but because of the way he looked at me. I hadn't realized how obvious it must've been to all our friends that we were irrevocably in love with each other.

I look to Azriel, then to Cassian, panicked. Cassian mindlessly dug into his food as if he had no idea what he had just stirred.

"Excuse me, I fear I've grown faint," I stand, making a show out of clutching my stomach. "Oh no, do you need anything?" Feyre said with pure concern that I admired. "I'm sure it'll pass, excuse me," I clear my throat tucking my chair in then navigating my way towards the washroom.

"I'm going to check on her," Azriel silently got up, dismissing himself. "Cass, I could use some assistance," He added and the male who was gorging himself on food stopped his eating, only to look up at his brother. "Right," He set his fork down and chased after Azriel who did not wait for a reply and began to rush after me.

I stood in the secluded hallway, back leaning against the door of the female bathrooms. Two males approached and I squared my features, wondering what part it was I would be playing in front of Cassian. I looked to Azriel for answers but his stoic features offered me none.

"Care to explain?" Cassian immediately interrogated and Azriel shifted to my side so we were both facing the other male, a clear line drawn between us.

"What do you mean Cass?" I ask, feigning innocence. He deadpanned, but inevitably pulled his phone from his pocket and brought up the incriminating photo, noses touching, hands all over each other.

"That's not me," Azriel denies.

"Oh really?" Cassian zooms in on the image, putting Azriel's face so clearly on display. We both swallow thickly.

"Every person has seven doppelgängers each, must be one of them," The male shrugs innocently and I look at him with creased brows, he had to have known how ignorant that had sounded, right?

"You have the same tattoos," Cassian narrows his eyes at his brother, as if he even had to argue. He had photographic proof in his very hands, there was nothing more to be said.

"So it's just a coincidence that both of your doppelgängers are at this diner right now and I just so happened to see?" He arches a brow and we both shrug. He looks to us, then to the image, then back to us as if we were genuinely convincing him.

"Alright fine, it's us," I confess and Azriel looks at me slightly shocked, I had been the one hiding this from them for so long, it was my rule. There was no way he was going to let some stupid coincidence ruin everything he's been trying so hard to hide. "I had something in my eye, she was helping me get it out," Azriel cuts in and I crease my brows, gazing at him with an odd look. "It looks wrong I know but we're not like that, could you imagine?" The male looks at me with a scoff and I feign a laugh at the idea. "Me and Az? Psh, never," I wave him off and Cassian's features settle. "Not in a million years," Azriel seconds, patting my head the way one might to a little sister, the action making me viscerally cringe but I managed to contain it with a smile.

"Alright, whatever you say," Cass mumbles, either believing us or giving up entirely because he knows we won't give in, he puts his phone back into his pocket with a defeated expression and some part of me feels bad for lying, he had us trapped in a corner and we just kicked him until he let us go. I look to Azriel, silently communicating my pity. He shakes his head no, but I keep nodding with a mischievous smile.

"Hey, you've got something on your lip," I say, bringing my hand up to his jaw then rising onto my toes and pressing a gentle kiss to his mouth. His hand wraps around my waist, pulling me closer greedily. I press a hand to his abdomen and push him away because I know he wouldn't have let me go otherwise. "There, got it," I swipe my thumb over his bottom lip and he only stares at me with such wonder in his eyes, like he had never seen anything greater.

I look back to Cassian and he just stands there, stunned. "Am I dreaming?" He mumbled and I only laughed while Azriel's hold tightened around me.

"You can tell Nes, but no one else alright?" I warn.

"Wait— I don't get more information than that?" Cassian whisper-shouted and I shook my head. "No, no, no. I deserve an explanation, Azriel has been talking my ears off for years about how badly he wants you—" Cassian begins to expose but my boyfriend smacks a hand over the other male's mouth before he gets the chance to finish.

"We don't have to get into the logistics, we'll explain later, we've been gone for too long," Azriel grits out then removes his hand. "Go on now." He shoos him with a hand gesture that makes his brother grit his teeth, but inevitably he spins on his heel and stomps away.

I let my concealed amusement bubble out the moment he turned the corner, out of earshot. "We'll tell the others tomorrow, I doubt Cass can keep his mouth shut for long," I point out and Azriel nods with a chuckle, loosening his hold around my waist. "Alright, c'mon," I intertwine our hands, tugging him down the hall but he pulls me right back to him, my body pressing into his chest with the sudden change of momentum.

"Hold on, you've got something on your lip," He repeats, his thumb pulls at my bottom lip and I roll my eyes with a soft grin, rising onto my toes and pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, warmth spreading through my body as he fills me entirely with tenderness.

"Is it gone?" I mumble when he pulls away a fraction. His gaze wanders over my lips.

"Let me check," he leans back in and I giggle into his mouth, overcome with endearment as butterflies soar in the pit of my stomach.

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nuticecream · 2 days

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The ideal first kiss ( Windbreaker x reader )

character : sakura , kaji , kusumi , suo , umemiya , sako , togame

there is may be OOC

haruka sakura

I hardly think about it seriously , and as long as a little picture appears in my head , i can be ashamed of myself . Even so , he insists that he can give you a passionate and possessive kiss like the domestic male protagonist in an idol drama.

However , when the atmosphere was at its best , there was no possibility for him to take the initiative to attack , except for blushing and reflexive resistance. In the end , you took advantage of his unpreparedness , reach out to cover his eyes , and left a kiss on his lips like a wind.

'' WHAT ARE YOU DOING!! '' he shout and pull away , but if you look closely , you will see that he still seems like he kinda enjoy it. You giggle.

'' what are you laughing at...I...I am not enjoying to that bad kiss! ''

Kaji

there are some domestic male characterisrics in his personality, and he understand that , so he always suppress his thoughts when he is with you , and he is not willing to think about more intimate communication between couples , because he is afraid that his true self will scare you away. Even if you don't show it out of your mind , you still able to feel his concerns in your usual interactions.

'' I dont want to just hold hands...'' when you come up with your idea , he will rub his back of his hair in frustrations while trying to hide his shyness from you.

kusumi

It's the type that writes down his fantasies on his phone's notepad , but no one can guess what he wrote on it . One day you find out that he has this little habit , and you are curios to get up close and peek at the phone screen.

but just when you think the other person doesn't notice you , he suddenly turns his head and kiss you quickly . You touch the residual temperature on your lips , and you look completely unresponsive . You seem to vaguely see Kusumi's eyes hidden under the bottom of the sea with a smile on his face.

Then you stumble upon one of the note in his notepad.

'' if you kiss her when she's not looking , you will get a cute reaction. ''

Suo

he will carefully observe you every move and speculate on the type you might like , it's a very emotional person...

i will simulate various plots in my head , hoping to be able to maintain a comfortable appearance in front of you. Of course , there will be some thoughts that want to bully you occasionally , but because i don't want to be hated by you , I will still respect your wishes.

In fact , when it comes to this kind of moment , his improvision is not only used in his fights , but also suddenly changes his strategy depending on your mood at the moment. Looking at the eyes you dodge because of nervousness , he struggled to suppress his impulses.

'' i'd love to kiss you directly , but i'm afraid it might scare you...''

'' so can i kiss you?''

Umemiya

I don't particularly imagine this kind of thing , but according to me, ''if you suddenly want to kiss , then kiss directly'' , which belongs to the type of temporary rise. Although I say this , the subconscious still want to be alone with you , so I deliberately close to be on the top floor when no one is around.

'' you see this tomato grows beautifully , right?'' Umemiya rinsed the tomatoes and handed them to you , and you were already surprised that the date was to show off his happy farm , so you naturally picked up the tomato and took a bite.

'' how was it , is it delicious? '' faced with his question , you nodded in respond and brought the tomato to him and tell him to take a bite too.

However , he just comes up to you and kiss you on your lips that is not heavy or light .

'' Oh , it is delicious. What's wrong? Your face has become like a tomato. ''

Sako

the surface is not alarmed , but the heart is actually panicked, I didn't particularly imagine it before , and I won't make a special plan , but when it comes to this time , I will regret that i should have been mentally prepared earlier.

A tight frown can be mistaken for he is in bad mood , and when you ask him, it's suddenly visibly overwhelmed.

'' I'm thinking about kissing...''

However , after adjusting the emotions expressed on the outside , it is the type that will say the opposite of the inner words and the scene.

Togame

the unexpected is the person who will remember what you said , for example , if you said that kissing scene at the romantic , he will choose to create a similar scene during the festival.

The brilliant fireworks are reflected in your pupils, and looking at your fascination , he will suddenly feel that not only he don't just want to cooperate with you , but make it better.

After dropping a light kiss , he will lie about the kiss.

'' i am sorry , i cant help it'' but inside of his heart , he is happy like a kid.

#hayato suou #hayato suou x reader #suo x reader #suou hayato x reader #wind breaker #suo fluff #wind breaker x reader #hajime umemiya #umemiya hajime x reader #yuto kusumi #togame jo #jo togame x reader #haruka sakura x reader #sako kota #kaji ren #ren kaji

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batbabydamian · 15 hours

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The Boy Wonder #1 by Juni Ba rambling about why every time i open this book, i stare in wonder...HAHA and ofc!! how cute Damian is!!

Juni Ba’s style is so absurdly effective in telling a fairy tale for the ages. It’s a stunning blend of simplicity and complexity I'M GRIPPING THE PAGES AGAINST MY EYES…

Before getting into the interiors, THE COVER!! It associates autumn leaves to Damian's Robin title through the iconic cape shape/color; and on top of that, for a Robin going through a big transition in his life...a season of change one might say...Juni Ba your brain...

Damian and the leaves being the only colored parts of this cover is nice in focusing on those elements, but i also like to think by not coloring the background it prepares you to expect impressive inkwork in this book.

On that note, the interiors!! Starting off with Ba's backgrounds of Gotham as it establishes the strange new world that our young hero has been thrust into:

We get a neat tracking shot following a champagne glass that gives us a glimpse of Gotham from the upper echelons to the downtrodden in "Underwell"

This opening sequence quickly lays out the environment Damian will be traveling through in this series! It also sets the tone for some silliness with the cute zoom on the champagne glass before it BOKs the robber lol. Along with Ba's inks, O'Halloran's colors makes every part of Gotham pop - especially love the golds of the higher society shifting into the blues of the underbelly!!

Besides Damian’s personal conflict, Gotham feels like its own entity that he has to contend with. The dialogue speaks for itself, but within the art as well!!

"This city of ours swallows and crushes everything it can" -> a gargoyle's beak over Damian, crowds of people, and walls of advertising

"You've seen it too...the way it coils around one's mind from below." -> bridges and a passing train on a rail viaduct towering over a civilian

"A dark voice calling as if to say..." -> literally, "FEED ME"

LOVELY SHOT OF MOVEMENT... and i love how Damian's venture into Gotham opens with him passing a tree - its branches and leaves are the most organic element on the page before getting into the gritty details of the city! Some yammering because the inks are. so cool: the delicate lines of the leaves in the tree to the thicker/bigger lined ones closer to the camera on the right; the background inks allowing space around Damian's form + the fine line of his grapple!! More O'Halloran praise - PRETTY, and love his coloring over Ba's bg lines, particularly here, keeping the leaves darker on the right.

It's not only a pretty page it's just a really clean layout!! Ba exhibits this throughout the book but i really enjoy it here - from Damian nyooming, we head into these last 3 panels. his cute lil "Robin" shape easily draws the eye to the tops of the panels as we take in Gotham's liveliness alongside the lettering/narration

and the "Robin" shape?? SO CUTE. it's instantly familiar to us as Robin!! bold outline and filled with yellow...it's a Robin in movement!!...AN AUTUMN LEAF IN THE WIND... yeah, still not over that 😭

Damian's inciting incident is introduced in the former panel with a gorgeous backdrop of Gotham in the distance (plus itty bitty Trinity cameo haha). The shot parallels!! beautifully!! in the final page!! Damian is now in the depths of Gotham, his objective out of reach. The colors are of note too, where the familiar yellows of Gotham are suddenly a startling green after the demon makes its appearance. The Gotham land looks even more unfamiliar, which prompts Damian to seek help.

Some speculation, but the green could also be associated with the more mythical side of demons and such (like the ghost?? of the thief), but it could even imply there's a connection to the Al Ghuls themselves as it's the only other time green is so prominently used.

Now that the land of Gotham is established, popping in other fav bgs!

More lovely mix of Ba's inks and O'Halloran's colors!! especially allowing some of the brush/marker strokes to show faintly as part of the twinkling sky...STUNNING!! 😭 i love this whole page but this panel gets me weepy, SMALL DAMIAN IN THE VAST UNIVERSE COMBINED WITH THIS LINE "He knew he could be great. How unfair of the world to make him feel so small." KICKS MY ASS... i need to lie down

YAPPING AT MORE WONDERFUL INKING: the suggestion of windows offscreen from the frames casting these thick lines over the walls and stairwell; the minute shadow details over the railing; the hatching on the suits in the portrait; the framed portrait being its own panel!! cute hooded Damian in the gutter space looking in on the portrait/panel!! CUTE HOODED DAMIANS!!

SPEAKING OF PANELS, along with general effectiveness and efficiency, there's more whimsy in others!! like this kickass page of Nightwing whipping his escrima from first panel -> afterimage lines going POWPOWPOW hitting demons from a distance to ones closer to the camera -> and back into his hand!! IT'S SO GOOD AND SO FUN!!

Ba's action employs more diagonal panels, and characters are less restrained within boxes - there's more energy and freedom across the page!

not necessarily focusing on the action for this one, but THE WHIMSY!! the border itself is goop!! Also gotta point out that looming hammer shape!!

Nightwing's critical hit spans the entire page!! from silhouettes of a flip -> flashy stomping pose/Clayface -> to a distant shot of Dick landing

and a smooth finisher page!! love the motion lines on Dick's arms and waist + his head and arc effects popping outside of the borders; then the smaller panels for quick activity, and the final WOOB WOOB WOOB LOL i can hear this sound effect just as much as i can see it

Along with O'Halloran on colors, Aditya Bidikar on lettering works seamlessly with Ba's vision!! The text boxes for the fairy tale narration are like strips of yellowing pages from an old storybook!! Had to look up the term for this lol, but also reminiscent of those storybooks, there's even a use of "drop caps" - the big fancy capital letter!

Smaller things of note, but the bit of "Weakness" text from Ra's has a kind of. grandiose feel to it. Then the cute B< Damian behind the window!! Love how the bubble and text are faded behind the glass too! The end of the bubble tail is a nice touch as it matches well with Ba's bg inking :0

Otherwise, it seems Ba has done a majority of the lettering - dropping a couple of my favs below!!

also just this whole page: the very loud AAAH! text draws both Damian's and the reader's attention to the panel below!! it's a cool transition to a new shot where you can see Damian's silhouette on the building! The final panel is cartoony violence off-page through the bold POW BOOM SLAM haha + DAMIAN'S LIL FIST!!🥺 and the guy's tooth RIP

Pure speculation - Juni Ba's concept art included Carrie Kelley, so i'm wondering if the hostage in the beginning could be her and we'll be returning to this moment in time by the end. The worn Robin colors are similar to the design + their head is conveniently covered.

In terms of story, I'm obviously heavily biased, but the initial read got me rolling in emotions with how it has you caring for Damian. Damian as a character is so fantastical in essence - it’s part of his individual charm in the batfam cast! an heir of two kingdoms, born and raised with great expectations suddenly thrust into an unfamiliar land. he has a sword. he has a dragon bat for a companion. he is haunted by the sins he has committed. he is two apples tall. he's truly fairytale material!!

LIKE...past the panels of only his silhouettes, this is our introductory appearances of Damian. It's laid out clearly in the narration, but this parallel is SO GOOD: from the powerful and ornate visuals of Damian and the Al Ghuls -> to a simple panel of Batman's shadow behind a boy littered in scars, stripped of his home and status

Damian is out of his element and proves himself in the way he knows how!!

just kick me down a flight of stairs why don't you. i don't know which messes me up more, the top 3 or bottom 3 panels. His facial expressions!! his expectations for approval dashed!! Damian's hand reaching for his father!! only to be left alone with the body. The page after this is the final nail in the coffin in feeling just how lost he is in the world before he acts on it. And you root for him the entire way!!😭

Despite Damian's fanciful background there's so much heart to be shown in his struggles and discoveries - and this classic form of a fairy tale lays it out so brilliantly!! It's shaping up to be an amazing balance of heavier elements and whimsy based on this first issue, and it leaves you wanting more!!

Besides being a thoroughly enjoyable read, it's inspiring work!! i've ordered Juni Ba's other books to consume more of his storytelling, and here's the ones i've found so far if you're interested in checking them out as well!!

Mobilis: My Life with Captain Nemo

Monkey Meat

Djeliya: A West African Fantasy Epic

The Unlikely Story of Felix and Macabber

okay shockingly, i didn't blab about how cute Damian is as much as i thought i would, but i think the collage at the top speaks for itself lol

this is all you need to know how cute Damian is in this!! his cheeks are so pinchable, it was done on page!! 🥺 these panels obliterate me

#rambling #damian wayne #it's been 2 weeks since this issue came out and i'm still cracking it open every other day #throwing my chattering into his tag to possibly get more people into the series especially if you're a fan of Damian!!#i even used capitalization for slightly easier reading LOLL #the Damian collage was taking so long i was laughing how i'm taking more time to do that than the actual ramble #then i started rambling and then i realized i couldn't shut up sdfgh #feel like i sound delusional most of the time so these are maybe my most coherent thoughts LOL #pointing at pages over my brother's shoulder 'love that...so cool...look how pretty that is...' articulating WHY makes me sound insane😭

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duskandcobalt · 2 days

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Everywhere, Everything: Chapter Five

Chapter Summary: On her last night in Velaris before she heads home, Elain and Azriel finally gets a chance to talk about what's going on between them.

Word Count: 5.9k

Missed the first four chapters? You can find the Masterlist for this fic here 🥰

A/N: As always, thank you for all the love on the last chapter of this fic. It's always so much fun to hear what you guys think. An extra thank you for your patience with me in getting chapter five out. This past month has been a rough one and I haven't been writing much because of it but I finally managed to sit down and finish this chapter and I'm happy with how it turned out. I hope you are too. As always, I must remind you that this is a slow burn and we must get through a heavy dose of angst before we can reap our reward. The good news is, the reward is coming very soon.

ENJOY XX

Read on AO3

The first time Elain had sex with Graysen was also the first time he’d asked her about the necklace.

It was the last week of January and he’d invited her back to his apartment after he’d taken her out to dinner at a glamorous hotel that offered unbelievable views of the city for their fourth date. She’d seen the invitation for what it was. Knew exactly what he had in mind from the way he’d lowered his voice to ask her, the pad of his thumb sliding over her bottom lip. Elain had only hesitated for a moment before she’d accepted his offer, Nesta’s voice in her head from a night years ago when she imparted some wisdom to Feyre after a particularly bad breakup, her hands on Feyre’s shoulders as she looked into her teary eyes.

“Fey, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.”

Elain had laughed at her sister’s advice at the time but standing there outside the restaurant that night, looking at Graysen as snowflakes drifted lazily from the dark winter to sky to cling to her hair and eyelashes, she’d decided that she wanted to put Nesta’s advice to the test.

She’d spent weeks in a daze, unable to sleep as the memory of Christmas night played on repeat in her mind as if it was some sort of faulty film reel incapable of moving past a certain scene and insistent on torturing her. She had grown sick of it - sick of the guilt that consumed her for still daring to think of Azriel. For wanting him again even though she had been the one to leave.

Dating Graysen had only done so much to take the edge off, providing her a few hours of distraction each week, but she needed more. She needed to attempt to replace the phantom feeling of Azriel’s weight on top of her, the feeling of him inside her.

In a way, sleeping with Graysen had helped. She’d always liked sex. She enjoyed being close to another person, appreciated the immediate intimacy that came with having a pair of hands gripping her hips and someone’s lips on her skin. In the few times that she’d pondered what Graysen would be like in bed, she’d suspected that he would be much like the other guys she’d been with over the years and she’d been right.

His initial careful kisses had quickly progressed to deeper, bruising ones. The gentle hands that had slowly undone the zipper on the back of her dress had transitioned into firm hands that held her down and maneuvered her whichever way he liked, taking her how he wanted without taking a second to even check if she enjoyed the things he did.

Elain was used to this treatment. The rough sex. She’d come to like it - crave it, even. But every now and then, there was an occasional moment where her partner would leave and she’d be left by herself in a cold bed, thinking about things a little too long until angry tears welled in her eyes at the realisation that most of the men she’d been with felt entitled to do whatever they wanted to her. That no matter how respectful they may have been towards her or how much they genuinely liked her, they all seemed to get off on debauching a girl that was otherwise quite reserved. Graysen had been no different and because she’d always desired touch, she couldn’t help but take it however it was presented to her.

Graysen had taken the small golden pendant in between his fingers minutes after they’d finished, propping himself up on one elbow until his shadow loomed over her. His thumb had dragged over the engraving on the front - smoothing over the intricately detailed rose- before he flipped it over to study the back, turning it this way and that until it caught the little bit of dim light streaming in his window from the streetlamp outside.

“What’s the deal with this?” He’d asked her, the slightest edge to his voice. “You never take it off.”

Elain had tried her best not to freeze at the question but she couldn’t help the way her heart stopped for a split second before her heart rate picked up again, slamming against her chest like an anvil. She gently took the pendant back from him, easing it out of his grip to press it tight against her chest until she knew it would leave an oval shaped indentation on her bare skin. It was a grounding tactic, something she did to bring herself back into her body whenever her anxiety veered out of control.

What was she supposed to tell him? How could she begin to explain the necklace that she’d worn religiously every single day for the last four years? The sentimental value that such a small object held?

She couldn’t exactly tell him that every time she touched it, she thought of the hands that had made it just for her, thought of the way those same hands had grazed her skin the night Azriel had fastened it around her neck and all the things those hands had done to her the last time she’d visited home before she started dating Graysen. When she’d been propped up on Azriel’s kitchen counter and splayed out in his bed.

There was no simple way to explain that she’d never mustered up the courage to ask whether the tiny ‘A’ he’d engraved on the back stood for her last name or his first.

Instead, Elain had settled for the most honest answer she was willing to give him at the time.

“It was a birthday gift from a friend back home.”

She’d never thought that they’d get to the point where she’d have to divulge exactly who that friend was, let alone have that friend and her boyfriend in the same room together. She’d been a fool to think that Graysen wouldn’t put two and two together and last night she’d been well and truly caught out. She’d stood in front of him like a deer in headlights, one arm wrapped defensively around her stomach while her other hand clutched the necklace tight in between her fingers as if she was afraid that he’d reach out and pry it right off of her.

“Is he or is he not the friend that gave you that necklace, Elain?” Graysen had asked her once more, his lips pressed together in a firm line.

Elain had hesitated for a moment but she knew there was no way around this. There was no lie she could possibly make up to steer him away from the truth. It was plain as day who had given her that necklace and so all she could do was just nod silently and try to keep her hands from shaking.

“Unbelievable,” Graysen ran a hand through his hair, tugging at the short strands. “He’s not just a fucking friend then, is he? Didn’t seem like he goes around making jewelry for all of his friends.”

He was right. Azriel had never made anything for anyone except her. It was something that Feyre and Nesta never let him forget.

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Elain took a deep breath, dropping her necklace back down and crossing her arms in front of her chest. “A friend made me a necklace for my birthday. There’s nothing else to it.”

“Did you date him?” He’d asked, his gaze unwavering as he stared her down. Daring her to try and lie to him.

“No.” Elain answered easily and honestly. “We never dated. Never even came close to it.”

Even if she’d spent plenty of time daydreaming of what it would be like to date Azriel, she’d never pursued anything more with him for reasons that were all too complicated to explain.

“But you’ve fucked him.”

He hadn’t phrased it as a question. It was a statement, his shoulders squared and his voice sure.

Elain had hesitated a second too long and she watched as something settled in his eyes that made her realise that he’d been hoping he’d been wrong and was sorely disappointed to find out that his assumption was correct.

“How many times?”

She had scoffed, shaking her head. Couldn’t believe that he would have the audacity to even ask her that question.

She’d been about to open her mouth to argue back, to ask him what number would qualify as too many times or if knowing how many times she’d slept with Azriel would affect anything, but the sound of footsteps running down the hallway caused her to pause.

She’d been saved by her nephew who had popped his little curly-haired head around the door to Rhysand’s study to innocently ask if she’d read him a book before bed.

Elain hadn’t even spared a second to look at Graysen again before taking Nyx’s small hand and allowing him to lead her up the stairs to his bedroom where he spent entirely too long picking out his book for the night.

She slipped out of Nyx’s room an hour or so later, only padding down to the kitchen to say goodnight to Feyre and Rhys, before heading back upstairs. She’d been simultaneously relieved and disappointed that Azriel had left just ten minutes before with Nesta and Cassian.

Elain had tiptoed into the room she and Graysen had taken over for the weekend, had quickly changed and silently crawled into bed, facing away from Graysen who excused himself to bed not long after their ill-fated conversation. He’d sidled up to her after a couple minutes, pulling her back against his chest while one hand slid up her stomach to cup her breast.

“Gray,” she tried her best not to flinch away from his touch. “We can’t. Not here.”

“El,” he muttered into her hair. “Come on.”

“Thought you were mad at me,” she couldn’t help the small gasp that escaped her as the hand that wasn’t circling her nipple dipped under the waistband of her underwear.

“You can’t blame me for being jealous when someone else looks at you like that.” His teeth scraped over the sliver of skin that the stretched out neckline of her shirt left exposed.

“There’s nothing to be jealous of,” Elain whispered, biting down on her lip as he turned her around and pulled her on top of him.

He ground his hips upwards, letting her feel him hard against her. “Prove it to me.”

She wasn’t particularly in the mood for this but she relented, allowing him to lift her shirt over her head before she bent down and pressed kisses all the way down the center of his chest.

This was the opportunity she needed - not to take her mind off anything that had happened that day. There was nothing that could keep those memories at bay. It was simply a distraction, exactly what she needed to hopefully keep Graysen from asking more questions that she wasn’t ready to answer.

She’d give him this, let him have her just how he liked while her mind wandered elsewhere. To a place where the hands on hips weren’t his but someone else’s. To a night that featured her fingers buried in dark hair while a pair of hazel eyes looked up at her from between her thighs. It was wrong - so unbelievably wrong - to think about someone else in a moment like that. But she couldn’t help it. Couldn’t bring herself to feel guilty as she let herself get lost in the fantasy of tattooed, golden skin sliding over her own bare skin. She was only thankful that Graysen’s hand was over her mouth to keep her quiet because if it hadn’t been, she would’ve had to fight to keep a different name from slipping out from between her lips.

One more night. She just needed to make it through one more night and then she could go back to her new city and do what she did best - pretend that the life she had in this town, and the person that she was when she was here, didn’t exist at all.

…

A few months before their wedding, Nesta and Cassian had moved to a sprawling property on the outskirts of Velaris that featured a gorgeous ranch style home complete with the porch of Elain’s dreams - one that wrapped around the entire perimeter of the house and featured a built-in swing to the right of the front door. It was picture book perfect and it helped to ease the loss both Feyre and Elain felt when Nesta moved… even if she was only a forty-five minute drive away.

Elain had always looked forward to spending a weekend at Nesta and Cassian’s. She and Feyre would pack a bag and head up to their cousin’s house where the three of them would sit shoulder to shoulder on the swing, a thick blanket draped across their laps as they watched the sun set over the mountains. If they were lucky, Cassian would bring them snacks and drinks until either bugs or the cold sent the three of them heading back inside.

This time, instead of a gossip filled car ride with her sister, Elain and Graysen had made the journey in almost complete silence. She had hoped that they’d made their peace last night but when she’d awoken this morning, it was clear that there was still some awkwardness lingering between them… perhaps at the knowledge that the subject of their argument would be sharing a wall with them tonight.

He hadn’t left her alone for even a second since they’d walked into the house to find Azriel already there, a dish towel slung over his shoulder as he chopped onions for whatever it was Nesta had on the menu for the evening. Even when she went to greet Azriel with a hug, deciding that it would be more suspicious if she greeted him any differently today, Graysen’s fingers had stayed on her back.

She remained patient with him, pushing aside the anxiety she felt at his constant proximity. She did her best to reassure him any way she could that he had nothing to worry about, all the while hoping that maybe she could convince herself of the very same thing in the process.

There had been no ducking out of his arms or dodging his kisses tonight. There had only been soft smiles and reassuring touches at all the right moments. Still, she couldn’t help that as she stood around the kitchen counter with her family - her attention had shifted, catching the subtle flex of Azriel’s forearms as he leant forward, his hands wrapping around the lip of the counter as he spoke to Cassian.

It was the smallest movement, barely noticeable, yet it triggered something in her brain that thrust her straight back into the memory that she’d tried and failed to avoid for the past few months.

Suddenly, she couldn’t concentrate on anything else, unable to tear her eyes away from the familiar ridges and veins of his hands. The heat of Graysen’s palm flat against the middle of her back faded into nothing as she remembered the taste of cinnamon and cream. Remembered the way she had once been perched on a counter so similar to the one they were currently standing around. The easy way Azriel had slotted himself between her knees, her dress rising up her thighs. The feeling of his fingers dragging up her legs until they slipped under her hem. The gentleness with which he’d touched her. She swore she could feel his breath against her neck. Swore she could hear the things he’d whispered into her ear that night.

“Helloooo… Earth to Elain!” Feyre’s voice brought her back to reality, her sister’s hand waving in front of her face as Elain’s vision cleared and she attempted to remember where the hell she was and what she was doing. “I asked if you wanted another drink?”

Elain could only nod, afraid of how her voice might betray her if she attempted to speak. It didn’t help that she was all too aware of the way Graysen watched her, blue eyes once again filled with the suspicion she’d been working so hard to keep at bay as he tracked her gaze to the pair of hazel eyes that were now staring directly back at her from the other side of the counter.

She readily accepted the margarita Feyre handed her, not wasting any time before downing half of it in one go. She’d never needed a drink more in her entire life.

…

Azriel stood directly outside the kitchen. He hadn’t turned any lights on when he’d wandered out a little while ago so it was just him, the stars, and the tiny smoldering ember of amber light flickering at the end of the lit cigarette slotted in between his index and middle finger.

He was utterly exhausted, eyes bleary as he tried and failed to link the stars together to form a constellation. He’d tried to fall asleep but he was too distracted by racing thoughts of the way Elain had looked at him from across the kitchen counter. The fleeting want that had appeared in her eyes - there and gone in a second, a lingering blush on her cheeks the only evidence that he hadn’t imagined the whole thing. He told himself it was just the margarita in her hands that had caused the sudden rush of heat to her cheeks but he knew her better than that. He knew all her tells.

That’s why it had hurt even more to see her disappear down the hallway and into her room, her piece-of-shit boyfriend in tow. Azriel didn’t know how long he’d lasted laying in bed before he’d gotten back up and stumbled outside, too paranoid about each and every noise that he could hear from the room that shared a wall with the one he stayed in each time he found himself crashing at Nesta and Cassian’s for the night.

If Graysen had been annoying at Nyx’s party yesterday, he’d been ever worse this evening because he’d scaled up the charisma and had seemed hell bent on befriending Azriel only to then become increasingly quietly irritated when Azriel made it clear that he was completely disinterested in anything that even remotely hinted at any sort of camaraderie.

He’d also taken to being even clingier with Elain. Hadn’t given her even a second to breathe all night, trailing behind her every chance he got, pulling her back into his side any time she strayed more than a few inches away. Even stranger, Elain had seemed intent on appeasing him and had stayed faithfully by Graysen’s side the entire time. She hadn’t even disappeared for a moment alone with Feyre and Nesta to talk about whatever the hell those three talked about whenever they were left alone together. All Azriel knew was that it usually resulted in raised voices, either in the form of an argument or incomprehensible half sentences interrupted by high pitched giggles as they all spoke over each other.

Azriel saw Graysen’s overbearing behaviour for what it was - insecurity.

Insecurity that came with a front row seat to the realisation that his prized girlfriend had an entire life before him. Without him. That she had family and friends that cared about her.

Azriel had a feeling Elain’s life in Meadowview revolved heavily around Graysen. They probably spent time with his friends. Went to his favourite restaurants. Did his favourite activities. He wondered if she’d managed to retain any part of herself when she was halfway around the country, isolated in a bubble with Graysen, with no real escape other than her job.

Maybe it wasn’t fair to jump to conclusions, to assume that she hadn’t been able to maintain a sense of self. He hoped for the best, desperately wanted to be wrong, but he knew her too well to know that he most likely wasn’t far off.

He wanted to talk to her about it to try and decipher for himself exactly how she was doing but he hadn’t been able to get her alone - either because she’d been avoiding him or because of the five foot ten, blonde, walking trust fund who’d been glued to her hip for the past eight hours.

That’s why when the lamp in the kitchen switched on, the soft golden glow illuminating the window over the sink, it felt like a prayer was answered.

He didn’t know exactly how he knew that she’d been the source of that light or that she’d be the one to walk outside but he knew when he turned to look, she’d be there - hair gilded by the light behind her. It was something about the gentle way the storm door creaked open, the feather light footsteps against the wooden floorboards. Something about the even, familiar rhythm of her breath.

He’d managed to get in one last deep drag of his cigarette before she was standing beside him, close enough that her arm brushed his. She reached up, lazily taking the cigarette from his fingers. She studied it and for one singular moment, he wondered if she’d surprise them both and take it between her lips. But this was Elain and so all he could do was huff out an amused laugh as she frowned, letting the cigarette fall to the floor until she could snub it out with her slipper covered foot.

“Filthy habit,” Elain muttered.

It was only then that he really allowed himself to look at her. He was thankful for the little bit of light from the kitchen lamp as his eyes traveled from her feet and up her bare legs to the hint of lilac shorts that he could only see the ruffled hem of because they were largely covered by the sweatshirt that fell right down to the top of her thighs.

It was a Velaris University sweatshirt that at one point had been black but now resembled a faded gray and included a smattering of tiny holes around the stretched out collar. That sweatshirt had been missing from his closet for the better part of a decade. She’d had it in her possession for so long that Azriel wasn’t entirely sure that she would even remember who its original owner had been. It’s why he didn’t let himself read too much into her wearing that particular sweatshirt while sharing a bed with someone else.

His eyes continued their journey upwards, over those full lips and the perfect slope of her nose. All the way up to drowsy, brown eyes and the tousled hair that he hoped and prayed was just the result of a restless night’s sleep and not the other option that sprung to mind.

Her eyes were fixed on him, clearly drinking in the sight of him just like she’d done when he’d first walked into Nyx’s party.

There was a beat of silence between them, neither of them really knowing where to begin now that they were alone together.

“Hi.” Her voice was barely a squeak, nervous and high and he couldn’t stand it. Hated this awkwardness between them. Hated that she felt any level of unease around him.

“Trouble sleeping?” He raised an eyebrow, offering her a slow, sleepy smile that he hoped would work to put her at ease.

Satisfaction settled in his chest when he saw her shoulders relax a little, at least a fraction of the tension she held within her melting into the night.

He fought the urge to reach out and touch her, to place a hand on the back of her neck and slide his thumb around the knot he knew he’d find there. He resisted the temptation to tuck her hair behind her ear so he could see her face without it being half hidden in shadows.

“Yeah,” Elain nodded. “Couldn’t get the fan to work and I need…”

“The white noise,” Azriel finished for her, another wave of satisfaction flowing through him at the first upward tilt of her lips.

“What about you?” Elain asked, her gaze still focused straight ahead. “Trouble sleeping?”

“Something like that,” He replied, schooling his expression into one that would hopefully hide the real reason he was awake. “At least it worked in my favour this time.”

“What do you mean?”

“It means that I’ve been trying to get a minute alone with you for two days now.”

“Oh,” she bit her lip. “Well, yesterday was so busy with all the kids and then tonight has been a lot as well…•

“Yeah,” Azriel laughed, leaning into her just enough for his arm to press against hers. It was meant to be an innocent, playful touch yet it still managed to send a spark straight down his spine. “It was the kids that were keeping us from talking and definitely not because you’ve been actively avoiding me.”

“I didn't think it would be so obvious,” Elain groaned, glancing up at him from the corner of her eye. “I was hoping you wouldn't notice.”

“I notice everything about you, Lain.” He adjusted his stance slightly, pivoting at the waist so he was turned towards her. “Always have.”

There was another second of silence as she looked away from him, nervously running a hand through her hair. “You can’t say things like that.”

“It’s true, though.” He shrugged, choosing to move on with the conversation before she could ruminate on that any further.“How have you been?”

“Thought you noticed everything about me.” He could practically hear her smirk even through the sleepy rasp of her voice and he loved it. Appreciated the fleeting moment of playfulness. Of normalcy. “Shouldn’t you know the answer?”

“I want to hear it from you.”

“I’ve been good,” Elain still didn’t look at him. Her eyes were focused steadily, stubbornly ahead. “Meadowview is good. Work is good. Everything’s good.”

“Say good one more time and maybe I’ll believe you.” He hadn’t missed that she’d neglected to mention her boyfriend.

“Funny,” she rolled her eyes. “How have you been?”

“Fine,” he shrugged. Then, before he could stop himself he asked her one of the questions that had been haunting him since last night. “Why have you never told me you didn’t like when I called you ‘Lain?’”

Elain paused, her brows furrowing. She clearly hadn’t expected that question from him.

“What are you talking about?”

“Last night… Graysen said that you didn’t like it when he called you that. You said that you preferred to be called ‘El.’”

She ducked her head, the bridge of her nose wrinkling as she looked down at her feet. A surefire sign she was embarrassed by something. “I only like it when it’s coming from you.”

He bit back a smile, rocking back on his heels in an attempt to dull the sudden rush of emotion he felt at her admission.

“Thank god.” He pressed a hand to his chest in a show of relief. “I’ve been worried that I’ve been unknowingly pissing you off for the past ten years.”

Azriel chuckled, teeth dragging over his lower lip as she turned to look at him. She gave him a wry smile and a shake of her head and though he wanted to live in this moment forever, he couldn’t put it off any longer, there were far more pressing matters to discuss.

“Lain,” Azriel let out a breath, his smile slipping into something more serious. He spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully. “If you’re upset or if I misread the situation that night, I’m sorry but just tell me so I can -”

“Azriel, we can’t.” She whispered, cutting him off before he could even get out everything he wanted and needed to say.

“What?”

“I can’t… we can’t talk about this.” Her voice was strained, her hands twisted in the cuffs of her sweater.

“We have to talk about it, Elain.” He insisted. “It’s been months of silence and we can’t keep going like this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” she swallowed, shoulders once again tensing as she turned to face him.

“You can’t be serious,” Azriel couldn’t keep the exasperation out of his voice.

Even with such scarce lighting, he could see the blush that crept up her neck as she defensively crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“Nothing happened. It’s fine.” Elain said, her voice low. “It was just sex. We got caught up in the moment and that’s all it was.”

“Just sex,” Azriel shook his head. “You wouldn’t have left and stopped talking to me if it was just fucking sex.”

He’d always prided himself on maintaining a mask of cool composure around other people but it always seemed to falter around Elain. He couldn’t hide from her. Had never felt the need to. This was no exception.

“I didn’t -”

“Don’t.” He interrupted her. “Whatever you’re about to say about not cutting me off or about things being fine between us, it’s absolute bullshit and you know it.”

“Azriel,” Her voice broke, splitting his name into two halves. “I shouldn’t have left and I know that and I’m sorry but I just can’t…”

“Do you regret it?”

“What?”

“Do you regret it?” He asked again, making a point to look directly at her. “Sleeping with me. Do you regret it?”

Azriel watched as she closed her eyes, one hand of hers coming up to clutch at her necklace as she took a deep breath. It felt like a lifetime before she finally spoke.

“I only regret it in the sense that I can’t stop thinking about it.” He could barely hear her over the crickets and the frogs and whatever other nocturnal creatures occupied the field around his friends’ home. “I only regret it because I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”

He couldn’t believe it. Couldn’t make sense of her saying exactly what he’d hoped but never dreamed that she’d go as far as admitting it. Suddenly, he didn’t know what to say. Didn’t know what to do. It was involuntary, really… the way he reached for her. One arm extending, his hand mere inches from her hip. The tips of his fingers just grazed her sweatshirt before she stepped back, just out of his reach.

“Az.” The pounding of his heart came to an abrupt stop in his chest as he watched her eyes fill with tears. “It happened and it was good and I promise you I don’t regret it but I can’t do this. We just can’t…”

“Just tell me why you left then, Lain.” He pleaded. “Full, complete honesty. I just want to know why you left without saying anything. I thought - everything was fine when I fell asleep.”

“It doesn’t matter now, Az.” She wiped away a stray tear. “What’s it going to solve? What’s done is done.”

“It does. I need to know. I need to understand.”

“I don’t know why. I wish I did but I don’t...” she started. “I panicked and then I realised how awful I’d been for leaving like that and I thought you’d be upset.” She took another deep, wavering breath. “I thought you hated me.”

Her voice was once again so small, so timid. It shattered every part of him.

“Elain,” Azriel reached up and tugged at his hair just so he had something to do with his hands. Too afraid that he’d reach for her again. “If I were capable of hating you, this would all be a whole lot easier.”

“I’m sorry,” she breathed, tears falling faster now. “I’m so sorry that it’s like this between us but I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to fix this.”

“I just want my friend back, Lain.” He said gently. “I’m not asking for anything more than to have you back in my life as my friend. I miss you so fucking much and if the only thing that’s stopping you from talking to me is what happened between us that night then we can forget it. If that’s what it takes, we can agree to pretend it never happened.”

“It’s not that easy. You know it. I know it. It’s been months and I can’t forget it.” She shook her head. “It’s just easier this way, Az. You and me… we just can’t be friends the way we were. Not right now at least.”

“You don’t mean that, Elain.” His nails dug into the palms of his hands. “I know that’s not what you want. Look me in the eye and tell me you mean it.”

He waited for her to seal their fate. To look him in the eye and tell him that she’d meant every word. That she really wanted nothing more to do with him. But she didn’t look him in the eye. Didn’t really look at him at all. She only stepped further back, her gaze fixed on some arbitrary spot above his right shoulder.

“I miss you, Azriel. More than you know.” Her voice broke as she began to turn away from him, walking towards the door.

“Wait,” he followed behind her, his fingers closing around her wrist to stop her from reaching for the handle of the screen door.

She didn’t pull away from him this time. Didn’t try to step back. She just twisted around to face him fully, her pulse rapid under his touch.

“Do whatever you need to do.” The words left him in a rush. “ Go home, think about things. I can handle you being with someone else, I’ve done it for a decade… but please…. please don’t stay with someone that doesn’t make you happy just to prove a point to yourself or to me or to anyone else.”

There was another stretch of silence to accompany the crease that formed in between her eyebrows as she mulled over his words.

“Goodnight, Az.” She stepped forward, her chest against his. He released his grasp on her wrist just in time to wrap his arms around her waist as she reached up on her toes and slung her arms loosely around his neck. Every part of her pressed against him for a split second. It was over before it began but he felt the cool, dampness of her tears against his cheek as her lips brushed his skin just once before she pulled back from the hug.

He let her go, his fingers slipping slowly from her skin. “Goodnight, Lain.”

Elain disappeared inside the house and the kitchen light flickered off a few seconds later. Azriel turned back around, sitting down on the porch step after pulling a stray cigarette and lighter out of his back pocket. He closed his eyes and counted to sixty. When he opened his eyes again, he was right back to what he’d been doing fifteen minutes ago, before she’d come outside.

Once again, it was just him, the stars,and the dim light from the lit end of his cigarette. He didn’t know how long he stayed out there going over what just happened but he was still there, staring up at the sky and rehashing answers to questions he couldn’t decide if he regretted asking when the sun began to rise.

#elriel fic #everywhere everything #my writing #elain x azriel #elain archeron #elriel #modern au #azriel #acotar fanfiction #elriel fanfic #as always posting this and running off to bed bc im nervy hehe #it's 1:45 am and i have work in the morning why do i do this

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featherandferns · 3 days

Note

3 maybe a fluffy smut

3. Technically speaking, this is not my fault.

Additional ask by same anon: Okay wait I sent in 3 but that has a pregnancy blurb would be everything like smutty fluff

dude this is pure filth, I am so sorry. But hey! Hope you enjoy lol (I'm going to hell)

content warning: sexual content (fem receiving, p in v technically protected) - MDNI; mentions of emergency contraception; unplanned pregnancy

plan b - prompt 3

Thank God the chateau is empty save for you and JJ, because neither of you are being particularly quiet.

You’re practically screaming as he eats you out, a vibrator held steady on your clit. The asshole that he is, JJ has the audacity to laugh at you. He keeps chuckling against your shaking thigh, pressing kisses into the skin because he can’t keep his mouth off you for even a second.

“Feel good, baby?”

He already knows the answer to that. You nod against the pillow, forehead damp with sweat. JJ toys with the settings of your vibrator and another moan racks your body.

“Jesus Christ, why did we wait to get one of these?”

“Fucking do something, JayJ,” is your slurred response.

JJ laughs again, voice deep and husky, before obliging. His tongue slips in and out of your hole, lapping at your wet, parched like he’s been lost at sea. You aimlessly grasp at the ruined sheets, feeling your third climax fast approaching.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you gasp as it builds.

JJ leans back, replacing his mouth with his fingers. The cold metal of his rings presses at your entrance and it only amplifies everything. A strange but satisfying feeling builds deep inside of you, unfamiliar. Practically seeing stars, you come with a broken moan of his name. But as you topple over the edge, you soon realise that your body is reacting completely different to how it usually does. You lose all control, succumbing to the pleasure. Finally, as you come back down, you can make out JJ’s astounded laugh.

“Holy shit,” he mutters.

Panting, you shift yourself to take him in. You’d squirted. If it weren’t for the expression on his face and the raging hard on in his boxers, you’d be embarrassed. But you can’t find it in yourself to be with the way JJ is looking at you, like he wants to devour you whole.

“Oops?” you meekly say.

JJ flips you over frantically, looming on top of you. His lips crash onto yours, consuming your every sense as he sloppily prods his tongue into your mouth. He grabs at your thighs and shoves your legs up so your knees are practically by your head. And then he’s shoving off his boxers and lining himself up. It’s when his dick prods your entrance that you come back to your senses.

“Wait, wait, wait! Need a condom!”

JJ groans, annoyed and impatient. He rifles through the bedside drawer, his frown growing deeper and deeper with every passing second.

“Shit, there ain’t any,” he mutters.

“Please tell me you’re messing with me,” you beg, hands coming to cup at your face. It’s ironic you saying that when he’s the one that’s been patiently holding out for the last hour.

JJ gets to his feet and turfs through the door thoroughly. Nothing. He goes through his wallet, his short pockets, your bag. Nothing. Cursing up a storm, he shoves his way into the bathroom and turns the place upside down. You hear a loud whoop when he returns, holding the packet up like a trophy. You sigh out a laugh, elated with relief. With that, JJ doesn’t waste another second.

He fucks you hard and fast, holding out longer than you expected considering the edging torture he’d undergone whilst praising your body like a temple. It was an unspoken agreement that this part was more for him than for you. Besides, you’re so wound up that it hardly takes anything for you to come again.

The post-sex bliss is short lived though. After JJ peppers your body with groggy smooches, he moves away with a promise to grab a flannel to help clean you up. But then he stops mid-sentence. You crack open an eye, smiling doppily as you take in your boyfriend. His expression kills the joy.

“What? What’s wrong?”

JJ stares at you, wide eyed. “The condom split.”

You jolt up in bed. “What!?”

“It must have been an old one or something!”

You scramble for the packet and look at the date. Expiration date: 2017. Your mouth slowly falls open. Wordlessly, you hand it to him.

“Shit. We gotta get that plan B pill now,” JJ says.

You agree. Legs wobbly, he helps you dress and the two of you head out to the nearest pharmacy. Morning after pill equipped, you take it and put the whole nightmare to bed as a lesson learnt. Crisis averted.

Easy to say your victory was far too early. So, four weeks later, as you and JJ stare down at the positive pregnancy test in his bathroom, he sheepishly smiles at you.

“Technically speaking, this is not my fault.”

#jj x reader #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank #jj #obx #outer banks #outerbanks #jj drabble #jj maybank drabble #jj x reader drabble #jj maybank x reader drabble #prompts

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moon-brain-90 · 2 days

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I'm not Carlos's biggest fan but when the news that Hamilton was going to have the 2nd Ferrari seat alongside Charles I was like, yeah but Carlos will end up with a seat. But at this point I do think the likelihood has gone down. Especially with how he spoke about contracts during press on Thursday.

Red bull: I think this is unlikely. Not only has Max said he's contracted till 2028, he isn't leaving early(maybe if the car starts to be bad still kinda unlikely) but also red bull has 4 other options: Checo, Liam, Yuki, Daniel! Red Bull can wait to make a decision but Carlos can't. Waiting could leave him without a seat for next season. Plus, Red bull is looking for a 2nd driver and Carlos doesn't want that.

Mercedes: I think it's more likely than red bull. The contract wouldn't be long because they are saving it for Antonelli, so Carlos would likely only have a season with them. I don't particularly see them getting rid of George to keep Sainz in the event they had to pick between them to take Antonelli.

Audi: I genuinely think it's his best option. They want him for several years, they want to pay him well. The team would be practically built around him(and Nico) but he's made it clear they aren't a top choice for him. They have also said he has till I believe Monaco? To give them an answer(I could be wrong)

I cannot see him going to any other team if I'm honest, McLaren is set for next season, alpine and Williams aren't doing well, ect. I think he should play it safe and go to Audi and not risk it all for red bull/Mercedes. Either way seat next season, no seat next season I don't care but I do find it interesting and slightly funny how everything has been moving so far for him.

#formula 1 #f1 #charles leclerc #ferrari #max verstappen #carlos sainz #red bull racing #mercedes #audi

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liminalpebble · 2 days

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Between the Lines, Chapter 2

Masterlist

Summary: The exchange of concubines amongst the noble houses of Asgard is nothing new to the royal family, however, it is to Asgard's solitary younger prince. Since Loki had always openly declared the tradition barbaric and loathsome, he shocks the court to its core when he changes his mind.

The trickster had yet another surprise in store when he selected you, a librarian from a noble house to occupy his bed.

You're stunned, intimidated, even afraid, of the sly second prince, but you know as well as anyone that to deny a royal decree is to court death.

And so you go, only to find that this mysterious man is not at all what you expected.

Pairing: Femme reader x Loki Pre-Thor 1 AU

CW: Allusions to sexual slavery dubcon/noncon within the society. Power imbalance. Eventual smut with questionable consent. Minors DNI.

AN: This will be a multi-parter but not a particularly long one, so if I leave you hanging between chapters, I promise it won't be particularly long before it all comes together.

Chapter 2

“Come. It will be a long night, and we have so much to learn.”

He takes your hand firmly, but delicately, as if leading you to a ballroom for a waltz. The tenderness of it catches you off guard. You expected to be yanked over to his bed and ravished, left with bruises, and disposed of. That's what everyone told you to expect.

Instead, he guides you through lavish double doors to what appears to be his personal library. You crane your neck up, straining to see the top of the high, dark shelves and rolling ladders, all intricately carved with braided motifs, interwoven with mysterious runes and imagery. You have the dizzying sense that this room is centuries older than you, possibly even older than the god beside you. A stained glass skylight (a mandala of daggers) drenches the large parlor with eerie, icy moonlight. It tangles with the warm glow of the candles below in swirls of subtle blue and gold.

Loki feels his heart thaw ever so slightly at your glowing innocent wonder; the pure love and reverence in your eyes for those tomes, for the history of beings telling each other stories and truths, fantastical or factual...of people reading to know they are not alone. People, like you and him, who so often felt alone, who felt the painful singularity of your existence like a needle through the heart.

He smiles with furtive satisfaction. Oh yes. He has done very well to pluck this librarian from her life, like a flower from a secret garden of rarities. He watches as you walked in small uncertain steps, trance-like, towards the nearest shelves, raising your hand to graze the spines as you read them. Suddenly, you remember your situation, and turn to your prince asking, “I'm sorry. May I touch them?”

He chuckles, and sweeps his hands out from where he had them clasped behind his back; palms out in an open, gracious, gesture. “Of course. What good is a library, after all, if no one uses it?”

You nod, feeling a shy smile peek out from behind your nerves. He watches, radiant with longing. Those luminous eyes follow your careful fingers, brushing the spines so lovingly...the same way he ached for you to stroke along the iron pillar of his own, smelting him sweetly into something softer.

He swallows, blinks the thought away, and dons his inscrutable mask again.

“Would you like something more comfortable?”

“More...more comfortable?”

“Well, yes. As absolutely ravishing as you look in that gown, I don't imagine it's very pleasant to wear.”

The way his deep voice dripped like honey around that “r” sends a liquid, sugary, excitement coursing through your veins. An emotion you didn't yet have a name or category for; something teetering between fear and arousal.

He leaves the room in quick steps, returning with a robe of lush green velvet, placing it gently into your hands.

Loki gives a dangerous smile and a charming wink. “And don't worry, darling. I'll avert my eyes.”

He does as he says, turning his broad back to you. The prince leans against the door frame feigning a relaxed indifference that he couldn't feel further from.

It takes some time to free yourself of all the panels and boning of the intricate dress. You wonder how something so revealing could actually have so many layers. You curse under your breath as you fiddle with a latch for the fifth time, then sigh with relief as it finally gives way.

He...snickers. The terrifying tactician, master of blades and battle, the ambitious dark prince of Asgard snickers at you and you can't help but snicker back. It was funny. You probably would have laughed harder if you weren't still stiff and stifled by fear.

Finally, you shed the last of the layers. The gown falls around you like dead leaves, as you swaddle yourself in the verdant drape of his robe, reviving ever-so-slightly.

You take a deep inhale (your first since this stressful day began). The fabric holds his fragrance; earthy, snow-laden pine trees on the darkest night of the year, sharp clean mint, and something dark and hypnotic you can't place, like an ancient poisonous flower. It lulls you into a cool comfort, stills your breath, and soothes your chafed skin. You wonder if his touch would feel like this, but even better, and the thought makes the blood rush to your cheeks.

“Better?” he asks over his shoulder.

“Yes. Much. Thank you, Sire.”

As you tie the gold cord, you observe the shelves in front of you: Cummings, Eliot, Shakespeare, Milton, Whitman, and Blake...Midgardian literature. Forbidden Midgardian literature.

You turn and say, “You have Midgardian books?”

“Yes,” he answers, raising an eyebrow.

“I thought they were forbidden.”

He drifts closer, gradually dominating your space. As his shadow envelops you, he say, “Indeed they are for ordinary citizens. Not for a prince of the realms.”

You nod and feel your face grow hot with embarrassment. Of course. Silly question.

“But,” he purrs with a lilt of mischief, “that does beg the question...how are you familiar with them?”

You fidget, suddenly feeling that the oversized robe is overwhelming your naked body beneath it as it swallows you whole.

“I am...was...a royal librarian and archivist. We have special dispensations.”

“Ah. Yesss.” he says with a sneaky hiss. It's not the whole truth and he knows it, but he decides to play with his food a bit longer before going in for the kill. He loves to bite, but he much prefers to kiss beforehand; lips before tongue, tongue before teeth, taking his careful time to taste.

His broad hand slides around your waist. The other arm gestures to the expanse of shelves. He leans down, nose and lips nuzzling ever-so-slightly into your hairline as he whispers, “please, select a book, darling. Whatever your heart desires. I want you to read to me.”

@mischief2sarawr @mischiefmaker615 @litaloni @ladyofthestayingpower @gigglingtiggerv2 @smolvenger @lokischambermaid @sweetsigyn @alexakeyloveloki @loz-3 @jennyggggrrr @goblingirlsarah @lokisgoodgirl @coldnique @icytrickster17 @loopsisloops @muddyorbs @sailorholly @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @unlucky-number-13 @thedistractedagglomeration @thenerdyoldersister @mochie85 @peaches1958 @acidcasualties @mischief-dream

#au loki #loki fanfic #pre-Thor 1 Loki

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