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#she named her sausage because she thought it was funny that she was found in food storage
zuru-zuru · 8 months
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🐈‍⬛ First Pet
Let's talk about FIRSTS!
Ivy's first pet was gifted to her by a woman who worked in the Shangri-La galley — it was a sable with one eye who had certainly seen better days that they found shivering in their cold storage. She charged Ivy and her sister with nursing it back to health.
Ivy named her Sausage. Sausage spent the rest of her life trying to make Ivy's hair into a nest. Sausage lived a little over 10 years, but Ivy assumes she was closer to 20 years old.
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So I made myself wait to watch the witchcraft smp finale till all the povs were out, which means I waited for Cleo to upload and also my college decided to allow offline/traditional classes to be back so it took me a bit longer to finally sit down and watch the povs. So here is some of my thoughts while watching the witchcraft smp finale episodes:
(Spoiler warning)
17/04
Lauren:
-Yeah Lauren you kinda did drop the whole competition just to vibe, but that's okay I still love you!
-Omg her wings look like thicc slices of bread!!And the colors of it are real pretty
-Yeah Joey!!! You were the worst best friend ever, screw you!
-Scott to the rescue!!!!
-YOOOO Joey's out first!!!!!
-CLEO NOO!!
-Hi supreme Lizzie
-Scott's the new supreme!!!
-Oh yeah they all do have her autograph in a way huh?
-Everyone reaction to finding out Cleo was an undead this whole time is really funny
-OH I KNEW THE DEMON WOULD BE BACK TOO!!!!
-Lauren just dipped lmao?!?!??
Eloise:
-The "Yep that's me, you are probably wondering how I got here." Bit to start the episode was good
-Training montage
-Damm Shellby's strong af, she really giving them a hard time
-Ohhh her artifact exploded on her because of the reset, alright that makes a bit more sense
-Oh she skipped the demon fight hmm
-Lol she became a witch content creator after the competitions?!
-Oli and Sausage got bailed out by El
-They made wcsmp's version of love or host lol
-Did she steal a award!?
-Someone get Scott I found his supreme crown
Joey:
-Oh that ice blast spell is cool(pun wasn't intended)
-Bro not the Stacy callback!!
-Cleo's time freeze ability <3
-Okay demon battle time
-Gods why was it that Joey give the "If we work together we can defeat the villian." Speech, it's not at all a thing his character would say
-Bro the demon's not even taking any damage lmao
-Scott's new to his supreme witch powers leave him alone
-Dude what home the mages won't accept you ba- oh that one right...
-I mean yeah screw those ice mages and all that but how is Joey's story gonna end now?
-You don't have any best friends le- oh yeah Tiff would be your best friend after all the demonic and botania stuff the both of you bonded over
-Where's Tiff?! Did mother earth take her back or smth?!
-No Joey she couldn't have gone through the elf portal, she has told you before that the portal works only one wa- aphgkgdj?!SURE JUST GO IN JOEY BYE WITCH!!!
18/04
Prismarina:
-Okay so at this point I'm pretty sure that there many chests in the area but not all of them have stuff in them and are there for decor
-Where did that blaze come from?!
-Lmao Cleo saying "Do we have a cool name?"
-Cleo and Scott are not giving Pris a chance to breath lol
-"I can't see it but I'll pretend I do"
-Bertha's curse got broken!!(see Bertha you didn't even have to bring back your dead sister and the demon she took down with her to break your curse you just had to wait)
-Is Bertha immortal?? Also do they not have a job outside of being the supreme witch competitions referee(???)
-Is Mertha's curse also broken now?
-Lol the demon fight crashed Pris' computer
-ARE BERTHA AND MERTHA ENGAGED NOW?!??!
-Is Pris a siren of some kind?
-Oh her dead sister is there, I'm going to assume that's her spirit coming for a visit or something
Shubble:
-Oooo we are finally meeting this "she" Shubble keeps mentioning
-My girl saw the weird dead deer skulls and said "Ew"
-*Big gasp* *choking noises* *literally dying* *it was nice knowing you*
-*In a nerd voice*Uhmm actually those look like shiny charizard wings thank you very much
-Her immediate respons to seeing Cleo was zap-teleport out of there
-Love how Tiff, Shubble and Pris are just watching Lauren and Joey "attacking" eachother
-Shubble leaving the scene when Scott shows up lol
-I love hduo, found sisters <3
-So is Tiff's first death not counted?
-"He is already dead let it go" SHELLBY?!!?!!!KAGLZHSK
-Why is it always these 2 in a fight to death
-Oh she just flew away?!!
-"Aren't you like dead though?" Shellby you need to stop!!kdhdhchbj
-Oh come on!! We are not meeting "her" aww man :(
Cupquake:
-Witch Tiff's grandma used to make nightsade berry pies. Good fact to know
-Oop the Bertha clone is back
-Oh her sneaking behind Cleo was so cool
-"Our leader!"
-"Yeah I want a piece of that. Equality!"
-The voices are back
-Oh, so she did went through the portal...huh
-This is just a random thought, but are we getting a fairies smp next? Cause I feel as though both witch!Tiff and witch!Joey 's stories are meant to continue in a way? Guess we'll have to wait and see
Cleo:
-Oh this is the longest episode, kinda nervous...
-The voices of all the Cleo's?! Excuse me?!??
-Gods, to get any of the end armor set pieces is so expensive
-Oh here is Pris making her amends, yeah I know this already I watched Pris' pov
-"I'M YOUR MAKER!" It's great to finally understand what she said at that time
-Yeah, I think "the coven" does sound cool and ominous
-Did Cleo just pledge herself to Scott? I-yo-I can't understand what their saying from everyone talking over eachother
-Damm has she not liked any part of being a time witch...
-All the skins!!
-And she's human again!
-"And they lived happily ever after." That's a poetic end to Cleo's story. Since she did introduce us to her character with "once/twice a upon a time" and had kind of a storybook structure from then on
19/04
Scott:
-He sounds so annoyed that he's only allowed to take 20 items with him lol
-I don't like how Scott said that he feels like he was going to "burst" and green particals started coming out of him...
-"Wow, you can't just say she's big!"
-"It encapsulates how weird and wonderful we are but it all still works together." Whatever you say new supreme!
-Frank and Agatha were in a 20 buck bet lol
-Agatha what other stuff is down in your secret lair??
-HES LOSING HIS POWERS TOO?!?!!
-Oh he is really going through with it!! Anything for his love ig
-HE DID IT!!!MILO IS BACK!!!!
-Oh he drowned to save Maxwell(I still don't know who that is. Their dog maybe)
-4 years?!
-Maxwell passed away a year later?!
-"Moonlight" "My little shadow" aww Milo is soo sweet, I love him already
-So he left the crown behind willingly. I mean I guess it make sense he just needed the power of the supreme witch to finally bring Milo back and since he lost all his powers he's not fit to have it anymore...
-Wait does this make Eloise the new supreme or do we need a new competition to be held pronto?!(in my opinion Shellby should be the new supreme cause she came in second place)
Bertha:
-So the supreme cursed Bertha and Mertha because she looked into the future and saw terrible things were to happen if anyone else were to become the supreme witch? Yeah that's fair ig :/
-Oh wow that was a quick forgivness lol
-Mertha did get the worst of it
-Her nap got interrupted that's so rude
-Time for the supreme games to begin!! But were skipping that probably cause I already watched it 8 times before this
-Oh quick run down of the events?! Sure...
-Oi!! That's so mean to Lauren she did her best!!
-That was an accident though!
-Oh when Joey asked to break the crown to have all of the being the supreme witch Bertha said "Me too?" Hehe
-Where is Mertha?!
-All "-ertha named" mobs lol
-I'm getting nervous, where is Mertha?!
-Why was she on top of a ice mountain?!
-Mertha's uncursed!!
-"666 hours later" sihdudynxtwhAT!?!
-WHY IS EVERYONE GOING THROUGH THAT DAMM PORTAL!??!!?
-Also why were you 2 spying on Joey and how did he not see the 2 of them, they're not hiding all that well
-They have a witch police?!
-Oh Mertha looks so sad waiting for Bertha...
-"Bertha will return" well yeah I sure hope she does!
And just like that it's over...how do I feel about it? Well...I think the smp had a strong start and a strong middle the ending though...is fine I guess...just wasn't my cup of tea, but I still liked the smp
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wordsmith30 · 2 years
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Okay, so I was completely thrown by Paul trying to kiss Ellie the first time watching The Half of It (2020). It just felt so out of left field and I was just like, “Dude! What are you doing?” He’d literally just gotten together with Aster. How did he all of a sudden like Ellie?
Even Paul asking her if there was someone else was so shocking because it’s like: “You dummy! Aster!” (And it’s funny because not only did that question apply to Ellie, it applied to him as well. The dialogue in this movie was so on point.) He and Aster were a thing now. That’s what all of this had been for. But on the second watch, I realized that Paul’s feelings for Ellie had had a natural buildup and progression.
Truthfully, he was never in love with Aster and he and Ellie both knew it. Like Ellie said, they had nothing in common and the person that Aster had been corresponding with was not Paul. He was never going to convince her otherwise because he hadn’t even been privy to half the conversations Ellie and Aster were having (nor was he really interested). He was quite literally “hid[ing] behind other people’s words.” Ellie was the one carrying that relationship.
It was only through his bonding moments with Ellie that Paul began to understand what love actually was. He had a much easier time talking to her during their ping-pong sessions; he asked her about herself and her family; he actually listened to and understood the metaphor she explained to him about Jean-Paul Sartre’s No Exit; he listened to her sing at night when he took out the trash. He helped her find clothes that suited her and saved her from embarrassment at the talent show, showed signs of jealousy when Trig called Ellie “hot”, and let her crash at his place when she drank too much at the senior after-party. I think the letters he found in her bag afterwards were what solidified things for him: Ellie had initially dismissed and rejected his taco sausage, but once she tried it, she started writing to all of these food critics to get his name out there. (And we know Ellie’s a fantastic writer, so she made his chances ten times better.)
Ellie had invested so much time and care coaching and training Paul to give him even an eighth of a chance with Aster, despite knowing he was “probably gonna crash and burn.”
While he did get a second date (again, because Ellie saved his butt), his in-person dynamic with Aster did not improve and Alexxis Lemire noted the disconnect in that scene where Aster gives Paul the painting after her day (read: date) with Ellie. She was looking for that pensive, insightful person from her letters and kept coming up blank.
Later, Paul was much more interested in knowing that Ellie was going to be at his football game than Aster. When Ellie said that Aster had wished him luck, the first thing he did was ask Ellie if she was coming. And though he waved at Aster in the stands, he paid way more attention to Ellie, even becoming so distracted that she had to signal for him to pay attention to the game.
Then, instead of meeting Aster afterwards like he’d promised, he went to find Ellie getting Yakult from the vending machines. He didn’t seem the least bit upset about Aster walking in on their almost-kiss because his crush on her was gone. He’d developed feelings for Ellie while Ellie had fallen for Aster.
While Paul did in fact love Ellie, I think he confused platonic love with romantic love and wrongfully assumed that Ellie felt the same way for him. Heck, even Ellie’s dad thought they were together!
But I think the sweetest thing ever was Paul admitting that he loves Ellie platonically when he accepts that she’s gay. He doesn’t say, “I never want to be the guy that stops being friends with someone for loving the way they want to love.” He says, “I never want to be the guy who stops loving someone for loving the way that they want to love.”
He accepts Ellie for who she is, accepts her feelings for Aster, and opens up the floor for their joint confession about the letters.
Good on you, Paul Munsky. Good on you.
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rodentlady · 8 months
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Empires Pokemon Pt. 2 Pt.1 Empires Pokeballs ~~~~~~~~ As promised, Jimmy, Lizzie, and Joel.
Jimmy: Magikarp, Clodsire, Goodra, Lotad, Yanmega, Cranidos Magikarp? No! Magicod! He's Jimmy's first pokemon, from his past. His hat is based after him. He's in a waterproof Ancient Ball. Mire, Jimmy's Clodsire often gets stepped on because he looks like mud. Unsurprisingly, he's in a Muddy Ball. Slimeball, is a shiny Hisuian Goodra. Jimmy raised her from a Goomy. Gets slime everywhere even in her Slimy Ball. Lotad's name is Swampy, but Jimmy often calls him Orchid. Zero (0) thoughts, very hungry, in a Muddy Ball. Mudfly the Yanmega is the only one of the team (including Jimmy) with any braincells. She's in a Slimy Ball. Spruce is an ordinary hard-headed Cranidos. No one knows why Jimmy has a fossil pokemon in a Common Ball. Lizzie: Swampert, Lapras, Primarina, Dragonair, Dhelmise, Corsola Strawberry, sometimes Sir Strawberry, is Lizzie's first pokemon, as well as being her shiny. He's in a really old Ancient Ball. Lapras is called Sailor. Before Lizzie realized her true form, she rode across the water with him. He has a Prismarine Ball. Primarina's name only makes sense when spoken underwater, so Lizzie calls her Cake. She's in a Coral Ball. Diver the Dragonair hungers for violence. Lizzie finds this very funny but usually keeps him in his Elemental Ball. Lizzie named Soulship after the shipwreck she found her in. Said Delhmise is in a slightly glowing Prismarine Ball. While building her Palace, Lizzie got help from Prisma the Corsola to build the roof. Fittingly, she's in a Coral Ball.
Joel: Rhyhorn, Maractus, Claydol, Dundunsparce, Kricketune, Relicanth Joel's first pokemon is named after the Terracotta that the shiny Rhyhorn resembles. He's in a very fancy colored Regal Ball. Maractus is named Azeala. She's very cheerful and enjoys dancing, often to Joel's diss tracks.. She is also in a Regal Ball. Clone is a Claydol that started following Joel around one day. They are a help with building and are in a Clay Ball. Digger the Dudunsparce is a very lax pokemon who likes digging in specifically red sand and staying in his Clay Ball. The fact that Mezalea is fireproof is very useful for Mesa, Joel's Centiscorch, who refuses to stay in his Common Ball. Joel also has Relicanth. Channel was a gift from Lizzie about the time they got married and she's in a Prismarine Ball.
Notes: Both Jimmy and Lizzie's first pokemon are the ones they had before they went on land. The rest are post-memory wipe. Fun fact! Joel's Dudunsparce is the reason that he doesn't belive in Xornoth. Turns out, the demon and his Dusknoir don't remotely understand type match-ups and keep trying to use ghost moves, which Joel is also immune to for some reason. Once again, if you have any opinions or suggestions, let me know! Next up is the entire Wither Rose Alliance: Pearl, Sausage, FWhip and Gem.
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Empires Thoughts Dump!
Lizzie
Yall, her village is genuinely so cute
Reminds me of those village sandbox games that I loved to play as a child
Really appreciate the work she's putting into her builds recently.
Please don't rush CCs yall, it's obvious that they're working hard, saying this because I've seen people incessantly asking about Lizzie with other CCs in their streams, namely Joel and fWhip, and I think Pix one time and I'm betting Jimmy also encounters that as well.
Not only is it rude to CCs and even Lizzie, it's sometimes even discouraging.
Please stop.
Shelby
Something Wicked this witch way comes (Pearl voice)
Love the banner
You know, if I had a nickel... Yeah yeah you get the joke. But it's still funny it's happening again.
Hooray for Loyalty on a trident.
Katherine
Mentioned this already, but really appreciate Katherine's storytelling
That transition from white block to black block? Ingenious
Can't wait for the curse to spread /pos
Love her being hysterical in the comments when she found out the gold is from the Stratos Sphere
Joey
Hooray for heterosexual attraction I suppose
I'm saying it's heterosexual attraction (which is what's happening btw), BUT Joey has confirmed Pirate Joe is bi.
I wonder what brought that on
My guy finally got a creeper head.
Woo!
Get ready for your boat to burn cause an angry, 11ft sky god is about to lose it.
Jimmy
I ascribe to the headcanon that Jimmy did get cursed with the fossil thing and that curse is turning him into a toy
Amen to that
On a more serious note, I am genuinely proud of Jimmy as a viewer. His building skills are getting better, his builder's eye is getting better, his block palette is getting better, his time lapses are more dynamic. Jimmy has genuinely improved and I'm all up for it.
The others
Not much happened that isn't unusual
Just your average Empires episodes. Chaos, awestriking aesthetic builds, a bit of imagination.
I love Pix's catacombs, I love Joel's arena, I love Scott's roads, Sausage's windmill, fWhip's pork sign, False's farms and amnesia lore.
The advantage of watching all of the CCs is getting inspiration to build in your own minecraft world
We are spoiled.
Missing Gem tho, but she is moving irl afaik. So take your time dearie.
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empires-au-ideas · 2 years
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Bounties at sea au crews because I'll need to keep track of this
JOEY'S CREW
Joey: the deck hand who was put in charge of the wheel for one (1) minute and accidentally threw the captain overboard. He's spun himself a web of lies and now has to figure out how to be a captain. Originally a stowaway the old captain thought was funny enough to keep around
Sausage: fled his town after raiders came, looking to take the magic of the town for themselves. Sausage is here to get revenge and see if he can find any other family that made it out
Scott: an explorer with two curses, he can see magic auras and he LOVES collecting things. Only planned on staying on the ship for a year or two, but now he's wanted by the government. Here to have a good time and steal
Gem: a princess the previous three were GOING TO hold ransom but she easily escaped. But pirate life sounds WAY MORE FUN than princess stuff, and these guys are hilarious. Here to also have a good time
Pix: hostage they found on a different pirate ship who was just trying to go to some ancient ruins man. He decides to stay with these far less dangerous pirates for a safe (ish) passage to the other side of the ocean.
LIZZIE'S CREW
Lizzie: pirate captain who's definetly not a cat who's been cursed to be anthropomorphic. Short but surprisingly loud and scary
Fwhip: a back stabbing goblin waiting for the perfect time to strike... as soon as he keeps his focus long enough to do it
Shelby: DEFINETLY NOT a witch hiding from the government. She's a stow away but the crew was short on people so Lizzie let her stay. Lizzie is also discovered to be super superstitious, so Shelby hope she can keep her magic contained long enough to next port
Joel: not REALLY part of the crew, but he's a god who has given Lizzie his favor. The main reason for this though is to mess with The Sheriff though, as he is assigned to take in Lizzie's ship
THE NAVY
The Sheriff: very low ranking Navy official. He's quite keen to do Navy stuff, but just to get him out of their hair the Navy sends him to take in the two rival ships of Joey's crew and Lizzie's crew
Katherine: the runaway Princess Elizabeth who has somehow became a renowned bounty hunter over night. The Sheriff (semi-illegally) enlists her help. The Sheriff doesn't know she's a princess, but her kingdom is currently looking for her
False: during a violent storm she was thrown on board. She's not sure where she came from or why she was just floating at sea, but she's a good fighter so The Sheriff let's her stay. She's just trying to figure out where her home is
Oli: a recently caught pirate kept on board so that the Sheriff can THINK like a pirate. However, Oli doesn't really DO that.
SKELETRON CREW
Skeletron (i cant remember his actual name): the old captain's rival that Joey doesn't know about because he wasn't on board for long enough to meet him. Currently hunting down Joey's crew (unaware there's a new captain) for a rematch
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laments-of-a-fool · 1 month
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Kapsejladsen Mess
It's almost midnight, so it's time to reflect on today's drunken mess.
While I was on the hill with Blanka and her friends, between two great trees, our back to the 1340 building, in front of us was a sea of drunk happy people, and with her head in my lap, she told me something that made me gulp down vodka like water.
I know I shouldn't hate her for it, especially since she just saw an opportunity and seized it. She is so confident in what she wants, at least on the surface. But, I swear, I wanted to push her head into the grass right there and then after what she told me. How she told me.
Bring it down and then up, again and again.
Oh, that has constructed a very sexual image in my mind that just invites more doubt and resentment.
She let it slip that one day she found herself in your bedroom, with you there, with me next-door, and with a desire for you. Or for no one. General horniness. On both parts.
You fingered her.
Something sexual happened between you two. Who knows what else, probably nothing. Let it be nothing.
And the way she said it. Like it was a secret that wasn't supposed to be let out.
Wait, you didn't know? I thought he told you?
Maybe you did, maybe I dissociated, maybe I encouraged it, I know I did. Why did I do it? Why? I shouldn't have. I barely knew you. I wanted you to be happy. Why didn't I realize sooner I wanted you to be happy with me. Were you happy with her? Can you be happy with me? Will I be happy with you, or feel stuck, because I did this.
I made you up.
Who are you really, Emil?
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And I touched her right boob today. They had a normal volume I would say, just a size bigger than when I was at my biggest size a few years back. So squishy and like any other boob, probably. It was an experience, what can I say. I wish it was you. And that made me spiral again. Did you put your hand where I put it today?
What did you feel?
Were you as analytical as I was, enjoying the new experience? Or did you enjoy the feeling?
I wonder who initiated it. You always say you never go for drunk people.
Was she sober?
What about you?
Were you pressured or were you just as eager as her?
Picturing it makes me sick. In your room so full of games and guitars and clothes and vinyls and computers and kitchen appliances and plushies and posters, and with that bean bag rug, she got a place of her own, in your bed. And those thick sausages shooting out of your palm with their long nails, clattering on the counter as we talk in the kitchen, always looking grimy with some black underneath.
Disgusting.
And yet... I want them in my mouth. I want to playfully bite your flesh and bite your nails. You would keep me on a steady diet of keratin. And I would love it. But, wash thoroughly first of her.
So, how did it feel? Did your nails hurt her?
You know lesbians always keep their nails short for situations like this.
Maybe a weekend of not seeing you might do me some good.
It's a good thing Dinda was there, she kept me away from you, kept me preoccupied so I would not think about it. She's so nice.
Also, on the opposite hill, I told Leandra that I like you.
I named you, even though there was no need; she isn't stupid.
She was in a similar situation once, and still is, emotionally.
She gets these feelings and regrets, wanting to forget about her best friend with whom she fell in love, but it's hard. She tries to bury her feelings. I am also trying that. Failing at that.
She's bisexual, by the way; I just thought she was a lesbian. It's just her vibe, I guess.
Her advice was not to drag my feet and to be honest with you.
So, yeah, it's solid advice that I am going to disregard.
For now, at least.
Funny thing, these guys saw my Danish T-shirt and gave me a shot of Små, amazing.
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noteguk · 3 years
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bad behavior | jjk | m
This is in the same universe as “bad influence.” It can, however, be read as a stand-alone. 
— summary; in which staying late to volunteer at a self-help meeting was the best decision you made in a while. 
— contents and warnings; smut, the endless adventures of badboy!jk x goodgirl!reader, public sex (in a church…), dirty talk, fingering, degradation (name calling) but also praise, unprotected sex, clothed sex, creampie, cum play, there is a window and also reflections, rough sex, cockwarming, jk being a lil shit because that’s his main personality trait, jk smokes (only mentioned), enemies to fuckbuddies: dawn of the first day 
— words; 8.2k
— author’s note; for the anon that asked how their first time was like ;) join me as we explore the lore of this godforsaken couple 
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It was your mother’s idea for you to find a new place to volunteer. According to her, it had been a long time since you experienced “the invigorating energy of community work” — last time was when you were trying to level up your college application — and it could really “soothe your anxious soul” during the trying times of college finals. Apparently one tutoring program and two research projects weren’t enough to distract you, but you could see where she was coming from. 
In the end, you accepted. The old places you used to volunteer in had either shut off their programs or were just too far away from college for you to consider. At first, you decided to follow your mother’s suggestion and tried to work with children — “small miracles”, as she called them — in a local daycare. Which ended up being a terrible idea. 
You liked giving back to the community, you really did, but it wasn’t long until you realized that working with infants hasn’t been your wisest decision, and that children weren’t miracles at all. You got tired of going home covered in paint and with pieces of playdough entangled in your hair, and that was when you weren’t unlucky enough to get hit with other, less clean fluids. 
So you eventually gave up — both on the daycare and on the faint idea of one day going into pediatrics — and searched for a new place. After having to yell your way through retirement homes, and getting fed up with washing people’s sidewalks, you finally settled in a program that was flexible and light enough for your intense college hours: preparing (and then later cleaning up) a room that was reserved in a local church for weekly meetings. 
The entire ordeal took about two to three hours off your day, and more than half of it was spent as free time: waiting for the meeting to end, cramming piles of information in a small room next door. You didn’t really know what the meetings were about since they changed practically every month — they were, at first, a support group for teenage mothers, then it became an AA meeting, then a group for drug users trying to quit. Lately, you were starting to think that the church just gave away the room for whoever had the money to rent it, so it wasn’t a surprise when it was reserved for a motivational speaker to give confidence lessons. 
You had researched the guy, some old dude with an unpronounceable name and a sketchy background, and found exactly the type of person you had expected. Yes, you were in the house of Christ, but you were still being heavily judgmental of the fact that he was giving those talks when he had no qualifications whatsoever, and was probably making bank off all the self-help books he regurgitated at least twice a year to prey on vulnerable people. You did share your worries with the administrative office of the church, but they ultimately fell on deaf ears, and you gave up on the idea of kicking his ass out of the holy grounds anytime soon. 
It was after one of those pseudo-motivational talks that you walked into the empty room, ready to clean everything up before rushing back to your place, where your roommate had promised to greet you with some wonderful takeout. The chairs were still placed in a circle on the center of the room, where they had been since forever, and you made sure to align them perfectly before you moved on to the litter that had been thrown around the place. 
One good thing about those self-help meetings was that they were a lot cleaner than a lot of other attendees, so the “picking up the trash until your back started to hurt” part passed by surprisingly fast. You had just moved on to the snack table, analyzing what you could still save, when your soul almost left your body. 
“Hey, you,” you heard a known voice behind you. “What are you doing in here?”
You swiftly turned around, heart thumping violently against your ribcage. You didn’t know how you hadn’t let out the biggest, most blood-curdling scream ever, but that was just the first of many miracles of the night. “Jesus Christ,” you wheezed out, taking one hand to your chest. “You shouldn’t sneak up on people like this.” You swallowed dry, some part of your brain recalling that he had asked you a question. “And I’m volunteering here.” 
“I didn’t sneak up on you, you’re just jumpy.” Jungkook scoffed, leaning against the doorframe with that stupid playful smirk curling up on his lips. You didn’t know they allowed demons inside the church. “And of course you are.” He rolled his eyes. 
Maybe a few months back, his mocking tone would’ve stung a bit more. However, you had been tutoring Jungkook for about three months then, suffering through endless sessions of his whining and complaining, and you’ve grown used to his passive-aggressive antics already. You learned that Jungkook was a shark seeking for blood, waiting for any crack that would allow him to jump into a perverse little joke — about how you behaved, your priorities, or even the color of your highlighter. You, of course, always stood your ground and threw his comments right back at him — which was his initial plan, as you’ve come to realize. Jungkook enjoyed playfully arguing with you, and you thought that it was another level of strangeness and masochism you simply didn’t have time to dissect. 
Still, Jungkook (shockingly) wasn’t the terrible person you once thought he was. Every once in a while — when he was trying to talk you out of teaching him — the conversations you two would have were actually mostly pleasant, and he wasn’t awful to hang around when he dropped the whole badass persona to act like a real human being. You would even dare to say that Jungkook could be actually funny at times, and not in the bitter, sarcastic way he usually was. Sometimes, you dared to think, he could actually be reasonably nice. And also kind of cute. Even hot. 
But you would never actually admit any of that out loud. Or even to yourself, really. 
“And you?” You asked, turning back around to face the table full of half-eaten food. That looked like a battlefield, and you could already tell that there were only a few survivors left standing. “What are you doing here? Repenting?” 
Jungkook chuckled dryly. “You wish. My parents want me to quit smoking,” he said. You could not see him, but you could hear him walking closer to you as you fumbled with the large Tupperware. “We settled on this crap instead of a forced intervention.” 
You scoffed. Most of the food before you was unsalvageable — some of the cupcakes had been bitten once and then placed back, and you wondered how someone like that could function in society. “You don’t seem very motivated to quit,” you mumbled. 
Jungkook clicked his tongue. “I don’t really care.” 
His voice was much closer to you, and you felt the air leaving your lungs for a pitiful instant. You convinced yourself you had only gotten scared again. “You should care about the growing possibility of lung cancer.” 
He shrugged. “Maybe. But it’s not really on the top of my list of priorities at the moment.” 
“And what is?” You asked. 
“Amongst other things…” he trailed off and, suddenly, he was standing besides you, pointing at the chaotic pile of sweets. “I actually came back to grab another one of those cupcakes. The chocolate ones are great.” 
You didn’t know why, but his comment broke the odd tension that you didn’t even know that was there, clicking you back into your previous mentality — the one that you just wanted to finish cleaning up so you could leave soon. “All yours,” you told him, “grab as many as you want.” 
Jungkook hummed in satisfaction, reaching out to grab one special brown cupcake — an untouched one, thankfully. “I love when you talk dirty.” He almost moaned before shoving the cupcake inside his mouth, taking a huge bite off it. Dramatically, Jungkook rolled his eyes and sighed in delight. “These are fucking great.” 
You chuckled, glancing at his direction. Jungkook was dressed in all black, like he usually was, and you were starting to recognize a newfound admiration towards his constant use of leather jackets. What? He looked good. “I’m glad the self-help sessions are paying off,” you commented, swiftly placing the cupcakes inside the transparent container. 
Jungkook was paying attention to your actions now, like he noticed you were there working for the first time. “What are you doing with the rest?”
“The church will probably donate it, give it to the homeless or something.” You shrugged. “Or they’ll eat it, I don’t know. I just clean up the place and leave.” 
Jungkook laughed at that, taking another monstrous bite from his cupcake and throwing himself on one of the nearby chairs. Your eye twitched a little at the thought that he had ruined your perfect circle, but you’d have to fix that on your way out. “Sounds absurdly boring,” he sang. “And they’re not even paying you.” 
You sighed. “After all the places I’ve volunteered in, boring is a blessing,” you told him. You had just placed five hot dogs in the container, and you were starting to wonder if it would be a good idea to feed people in need with those suspicious sausages. “But, yeah, you probably don’t care about any of that.” 
“You don’t know what I care about,” Jungkook said matter-of-factly. You didn’t know if he was trying to tease you, but his voice came out so soft and monotone that you couldn’t really be mad about it. It was true, after all: you didn’t actually know what he cared about. Sometimes you thought that he could read you better than you could read him. “Want me to stay here with you? This place is probably empty already.”
You could not hold back your laugh at that, turning around so you could look at him. “Are you offering to be my bodyguard? In a church?” 
Jungkook pouted. There was a thin line of chocolate on the side of his lips, which he quickly licked clean. “I’m trying to be nice.”
You giggled, turning back towards the disgusting food. The rest was mostly trash, but you were happy enough with the amount you had managed to find in a good state. “That’s new.” 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked. “I’m always nice.”
“Always is a strong word.” You smiled, closing the lid of the Tupperware. You had managed to fill three small containers with the leftovers and, honestly, that was a big victory. “But you can stay or you can leave, I don’t mind. I’m almost done anyways.” 
He frowned. “Is that your answer?” 
You turned around. “What? You want me to beg for your company?” You smiled. “You’re mistaken if you think I’d ever do that.”
“I’m staying.” Jungkook crumpled up the piece of cupcake wrapping and threw it in the trash can besides your body. He watched you for a moment as you started to throw the leftovers away, your back turned to him and a distracted look on your face. When he broke the silence again, you were throwing the last piece of bread in the bin. “Why are you volunteering?” 
“Because I like giving back to the community.” 
Jungkook sneered at your words. “Seriously now. Don’t lie, we’re in a church.” 
“I do, actually,” you stood your ground. There was a vague sound of crickets coming from the half-open window and the low buzzing of the fluorescent lights above you, but, other than that, the city was covered in absolute silence. Perhaps that was why you felt so at peace. “But my mom told me it would be a good thing to keep myself relaxed. You know, take my mind off college stuff.” 
He hummed, and you heard him getting up from the chair. “You always do what your mom tells you?” 
You met his gaze. “Didn’t your parents make you come here?”
He smiled. “Not the point.” 
Before you could hold yourself back, your lips were curling up. Again: Jungkook wasn’t absolutely awful to be around when he actually acted like a human being. “When she says something I agree with, yes,” you told him. “My ego isn’t bruised when it comes to following someone’s idea.” 
He raised his eyebrows. “You’re saying that mine is?”
“I didn’t say that.” You smirked and turned back to the table. You started piling up the used plastic cups, already eyeing all the used plates, forks and knives that you’d have to throw away. The daycare had better eating manners than that. “Thought we were talking about me.” 
“We were,” Jungkook agreed. One of his inked hands moved to the table, and you were about to tell him that he could eat more of the cupcakes when you realized that he had started to reach for the discardable plates, throwing them away. You really didn’t think he’d help you. “Finals are coming up, though, and you care about that shit. Shouldn’t you be using this time to study or something?”
“I study while you’re out here listening to becoming your real self or, I don’t know... waking up the giant within,” you said. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.” 
He hummed, his nose cringing up at the disgusting remains of food that stuck to the plastic forks. Jungkook seriously didn’t know how you could do that for fun. “You know there are better ways to relax than cleaning up a dusty room, right?” 
“Probably,” you agreed. The cups were already in the trash, alongside with the plates, and there were only a few crumpled up napkins to get rid of before you tasted the sweet nectar of freedom. “But here I am. That’s what I chose for myself.” 
“Literally any other option would’ve been better,” Jungkook pressed on. “Isn’t that obnoxious friend of yours in cheer or something?” 
“Who? Jisoo?” You smiled at him. No one had ever called her obnoxious, but you couldn’t say that the title didn’t fit. Jisoo could be really… intense when it came to standing up for what she believed in. “She is. She invited me to join her already, if that’s what you’re gonna ask, but it’s not really my thing.” 
“It’s a shame,” he mumbled, leaning against the table. It was a beautiful miracle how clean that room had become just by getting rid of the piles of gross food, and you had proudly thrown the last piece of paper inside the trash bin when Jungkook spoke up again. “You’d look really hot in that outfit.” 
You stopped in your tracks, taking a second to digest the claim he had so mindlessly thrown your way. Just like all-things-Jungkook, a pleasant conversation could not last long, so you weren’t even surprised that he managed to ruin that talk with such a fuckboy-esque comment. 
Also like all-things-Jungkook, he managed to awaken a reaction out of you that you didn’t even know could be there. With a faint heat in your cheeks and a frown blossoming amongst your features, you actually felt a little bit of... satisfaction with the fact that he thought that you’d look hot in that skimpy outfit. At the same time, you wanted to slap yourself for falling into his charms so easily. 
In that conflicting turmoil of emotions, all you could say was a monotone, “You cannot be serious right now.”
Even if you kind of wanted him to be serious. 
“I’m being dead serious,” Jungkook didn’t back down, much to the elation of your ego. You felt like a schoolgirl being recognized by her crush, and the idea alone made your stomach curl onto itself. What the hell were you even thinking about? Yeah, Jungkook was pretty hot, but he was also kind of a douche and you didn’t want to get involved with that mess of a person. Or at least that was what you were trying to convince yourself of. “I mean…” he continued, “you’re even rocking this knee-level dress right now, can’t even imagine how you’d look if—“ 
“You can shut up now, Jungkook, thanks,” you interrupted him. Because you didn’t know how to act when he was so blatantly flirting with you, you switched back to the same passive-aggressive behavior that you had given him for the past three months. Call it self-preservation, call it panic, but your mind simply didn’t know where to go from there. “And I’m also done here, so you can skidaddle back to whatever swamp you came out of.” 
“Awn, don’t be mean, princess.” He pouted. Jungkook was a master at getting you worked up, and you had just given that to him on a silver platter. Maybe if you had mock-flirted back, he would’ve baked away. You would never know. “I was just fucking with you, you’re too easy to tease.” 
You pressed your lips together, hip touching the corner of the now empty table. “You were pretty much harassing me,” you said playfully. 
“I was not.” Jungkook smirked, shoving his hands inside the pockets of his pants. When had the two of you gotten so close? There was barely any space between your chests. “But it’s okay, I’m not gonna compliment you anymore, don’t worry. You don’t have to be so defensive.” 
“I’m not being defensive,” you said, defensive. 
“What, is it the church setting?” He raised his eyebrows, taking a look around. “Is it making you uncomfortable?” 
“No,” you answered, crossing your arms before your chest. Jungkook followed the movement and his gaze got stuck on the shape of your breasts for a second too long, making a newfound wave of heat rise up to your cheeks. “Not as much as you’re trying to make me uncomfortable right now.” 
He chuckled. “You do look cute when you’re shy,” Jungkook teased, taking a step towards you, and you took another one back, pretending you were just going to lean against the table. You sat on it in a weird diagonal position, with one leg still on the ground and the other dangling over the edge. Jungkook was so close that, when he spoke again, voice just above a whisper, you could feel his breath on your skin. “If you don’t want me here, just ask me to go and I’ll go.” 
You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. The atmosphere was filled with electricity, your body drowning in the warmth of his presence, the sharp seriousness in his dark eyes, and you could not bring yourself to say anything. Did you want him to leave? 
No, you realized in a rush of adrenaline, you didn’t want him to leave at all. 
Jungkook raised one of his eyebrows. “Hm? Nothing?” He smirked, placing himself between your legs. Every nerve of your body was screaming for you to touch him, to just wrap his mouth with yours, and you simply could not respond to any of its commands. “You’re full of surprises.” 
You found your voice at that comment, heart hammering against your chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“You’re a smart girl, you can figure it out.” Jungkook placed one strand of your hair behind your ear, his gaze flickering down to your chest. From where he stood, he could see the beautiful mounds of your breasts peeking under the fabric, licking his lips at the sight. “Can I at least say that I like your dress?” 
Jungkook’s palm slithered up your knee before you could even react, moving towards your inner thigh and raising your dress along with it. His touch was electrifying, and you found yourself craving more of it, a sigh caught on your throat at the tenderness of his hot skin. 
“Something tells me that your compliment isn’t so innocent,” you told him, leaning your head back slightly so you could hold his gaze. “Aren’t you gonna complete that and say that I would look better without it?”
Jungkook chuckled. “The idea is compelling, I’ll admit it,” he said, rubbing soft circles on your skin. His other hand slithered around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “But don’t need to take it off to fuck you.” 
Your eyes grew wide at that, brain short-circuiting. You frankly couldn’t believe that was happening — the fact that Jungkook was so shamelessly trying (and honestly succeeding) to initiate sex with you. In a fucking church too, of all places. “What- what did you say?”
“You heard what I said.” His stare didn’t falter. Jungkook was looking at you like he could eat you whole, and you seriously wouldn’t mind if he tried to. You'd deal with the social and psychological implications of that another time. “Just tell me to stop and I’ll do it, princess. No hard feelings, promise.” 
This time, you spoke out and the firmness and certainty in your voice surprised even yourself. “I don’t want you to stop.” 
“No?” His voice sounded like honey, so deep and melodic even through the thick layers of his sarcasm. You had never heard him get so serious, so focused, and the thought that it was all for you was igniting a fire inside your guts. “You wanna get fucked in a church?” 
You bit your lip, blinking up at him. The point was: you wanted Jungkook, of all people, to fuck you. The fact that it was in a church was just the cherry on top, and you didn’t care about it as much as you should — your mom would be weeping blood if she knew what was going on, but you weren’t planning on telling anything to anybody. “And what if I do?” You asked back teasingly. 
Jungkook smiled, knocking the breath right out of you. You could only hope that you didn’t look as horny as you felt, because your pride was still on the line. “Told you that you were full of surprises.” He pushed one of your legs open, making you lose your support on the floor. Now, both of your feet were dangling off the edge, body trapped between his strong arms and thighs on either side of him. “Are you a virgin, baby?”
You shook your head, and your voice reached you a bit later. “No.”
“Naughty,” Jungkook said, leaning in. He stared at you like a lion stalking its prey, his gaze lingering on your parted lips before, at last, he tilted his head to the side, deciding to move towards your neck instead. “But if you have the taste I think you do, you probably had some lame missionary sex with some goodie-two shoes.” 
When he started kissing your neck, you almost forgot to give him a response. You had to bite your lip to suppress a moan, instead producing a low, shaky sigh. “And if I did? What’s the problem with some lame missionary sex?” 
“No need to get mad, I’m on your side here,” Jungkook said, one of his hands navigating up your waist, between the valley of your breasts, before grabbing your boob. That time, you couldn’t hold back the whimper that escaped you. “Did he make you cum?” 
“Sometimes,” you said, slightly flustered. You didn’t think you’d be discussing your sexual history with Jungkook, but, well, there you were. “He was alright.” 
“Only sometimes?” Jungkook chuckled, the vibrations of his deep timbre vibrating through the sensitive skin of your neck, his thumb grazing your nipple. The heat between your legs only grew, your entire body practically begging to feel more of him. “That’s a shame, I could do better.” 
You rolled your eyes. “Don’t start getting cocky.”
“I never stopped being cocky,” he responded without hesitation. Well, he was right. “And I do have a good track record.” 
“Doubt it,” you said, the ghost of a smile lingering on your lips. You knew that you were playing a dangerous game, pressing right at the weak spots of his inflated ego to see how he would react. Perhaps you’d be luckier trying to poke a bear with a short stick. “You wouldn’t know the difference between a real and fake orgasm even if it hit you in the face.” 
Jungkook leaned back and looked at you for an instant. You knew he had caught onto your challenge straight away. He liked it as much as you did, there was no doubt about that. “Let’s see, shall we?” he asked. There was no denying the devilish aura that was all around him now, suffocating you with its tempting heat. “How long do we have?”
“I’m locking up the room tonight,” you said, watching as his eyes sparked with an emotion you could not decipher. “But I wanna get home before ten. Have homework.” 
You could see him fighting against the natural urge to ridicule you for saying something like that at such an odd time, but, at the end, he managed to avoid it. “More than enough time.” Jungkook placed one hand on the back of your neck, gaze darting hungrily toward your lips. “Come here.”
And then his mouth was on yours, and everything else was white noise. Jungkook kissed you much slower than you had anticipated, taking his sweet time caressing your mouth with his; hands exploring the curves of your body and teasing their way underneath your dress. He sighed heavily against your mouth when you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss, his soft tongue poking out and entering your mouth perfectly. Jungkook was a good kisser, you had to admit it, and he got your knees weak sooner than you’d like. 
His body was hot and firm against yours and you could feel the outline of his abs underneath your fingers as you trailed your hands down his torso; his quick heartbeat drumming on your palms. Jungkook’s breathing got heavier as you hooked your fingers on the hem of his pants and tugged him toward you. Instantly you noticed the outline of his hard cock against your inner thigh. 
Then, something switched. Just as you had reached out to touch his hardness, squeezing it lightly underneath your fingers, Jungkook groaned against your mouth and bit down on your lip. You had barely any time to react before he was pulling away from the kiss, gaze darkening. 
“Such a tease,” he mumbled hoarsely, his breath hitting your mouth in soft waves. His hand was hovering over your heat, his middle finger pressing down on your sensitive nub, making you whimper. “You don’t know what you do to me.” 
Jungkook was much quicker than your thoughts and, within a second, the motion of your panties being pushed aside made you fumble closer to him; your hands holding tightly onto his shoulders when he finally decided to touch you. 
“Fuck,” he groaned next to your ear, making your mind go blank for a split second. The teasing motions of his digits brushing your entrance were enough to make you whimper, hips thrusting forward in a failed attempt to make him move further. “Look at this, you’re soaking my fingers. Wanna get fucked that bad?”
But he didn’t let you respond. The sudden intrusion of two fingers inside your pussy made your back arch, nails digging in the leather of his jacket as Jungkook opened you up. “I—” you tried to speak, but it was hard to think when he started pumping his fingers in and out of you. The sounds of your wetness were a filthy symphony filling the quiet atmosphere. “Jungkook, what—” 
“God, that’s so tight,” he groaned, speaking through clenched teeth. His voice was enough to shut you up at the spot, a frail moan dripping from your lips. “Relax, baby, you’re too tense. Let me take care of you, alright?” 
You nodded, eyes drifting shut as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you. You hated to admit it, but Jungkook was already winning against your ex by a long shot: the way his digits brushed inside you, gradually moving apart to stretch you, got you searching — begging — for more. You were sure you could cum around his fingers and, when he curled them up and they dragged against your sweet spot, the idea became a lot more palpable. 
“Jungkook, you’re taking too long, I’m gonna cum like this,” you complained, chest rising and falling under the waves of your upcoming orgasm. You could feel it building up in your stomach, ready to snap, and you didn’t want it to happen around his fingers. “I wanna feel you.” 
Jungkook breathed out at your needy request, placing a kiss against your jaw. “I’m just getting you ready for my cock, baby,” he said. A loud moan dripped from you when he unceremoniously added a third finger, your legs trembling on either side of his body. “I don’t know if you can take it.”
You scoffed. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you said, only half aware of the fact that your voice sounded more like a whimper than a serious comment. “I can.” 
He smirked wickedly. You really were pushing his buttons. “We’ll see about that,” Jungkook responded. 
Within a second, right as your orgasm was about to wash over you, he removed his fingers from your pussy. The frustrated moan you let out was quickly swollen by him, his mouth rogue against yours and the sweetness of his tongue intoxicating you — probably those stupid cupcakes, you thought. 
“Turn around for me,” he asked. 
You quickly did as he requested, putting your feet on the ground before turning your back to him, hands leaning on the table. Jungkook placed one hand on the curve of your spine, pushing you down until you had your chest against the surface, ass perked up and pussy in full display for him. There was a gush of cold air against your flesh when he pulled up the fabric of your dress and tossed it over your waist, exposing your lower body for him.
The boy hummed at the sight, one of his legs kicking your feet apart so he could position himself in the middle of your thighs. “You’re pretty all around,” Jungkook commented, one of his palms grazing your asscheek before grabbing it. His motion was harsh, needy; earning a whimper from you. “Knew you would be.” 
Through the dense clouds of your desire, there was still some part of you that managed to make fun of that situation. “You spend your free time thinking about my ass?”
“Won’t answer until I have a lawyer present,” he joked. 
You felt his fingers hooking around the fabric of your panties, pushing it further to the side so you had your cunt fully exposed for him to see. The drumming of your heartbeat almost drowned out the low groan he produced at the sight of your flushed heat. 
“Princess, your pussy is dripping so much…” Jungkook trailed off, one of his fingers tracing a line between your lips. He felt the urge to eat you out, to lick you completely clean and make you cum on his tongue, but he decided that would have to wait for a different time. “Is this all for me?” 
“Yeah, all for you,” you said, weak. There was a thundering exasperation building up inside you, motivated from your denied orgasm and from the way that Jungkook was taking his sweet time. 
“Good girl,” he mumbled and your chest was filled with pride. “Can’t wait to fuck it.” 
“Then don’t wait,” you practically begged. “Just rush.”
He removed his finger from your heat. “Shh… be patient,” Jungkook told you and you swore you could practically hear the smile in his voice. You could hear him shuffling behind you, the sound of his zipper opening echoing around that still room. “I’m gonna give you whatever you want.” 
You whined at the abrupt feeling of his warm cock rubbing between your folds, its tip hitting your clit after every languid thrust. “Fuck,” you cried out, shaky. Jungkook wasn’t lying when he said that he was big, his length was so thick that you were starting to get second thoughts whether you could take it or not. Not that you would ever admit it out loud. “Just put it in, Jungkook.” 
But Jungkook was having way more fun just teasing you. “Pussy’s so wet for me.” He breathed out, his hands tightening around your hips. You felt him throb between your folds, and the sensation got you searching for air. “You’re soaking my cock, baby. You want it that much?”
“Y-Yeah.”  
Jungkook hummed, leaning in so he could place a kiss on your shoulder. “I’m gonna fuck you like you deserve to be fucked, princess,” he promised, his length still rubbing between your folds. He was so hard and heavy that your mind was spinning, your lungs drowning in expectation. “Gonna fuck you so well that you’re never going to forget it. Do you want that?”
“Yes,” your voice was a pathetic moan, and you hated your body for betraying you so easily. “Yes, please.” 
After another pec on your shoulder, Jungkook leaned back. “Be loud for me, alright?” He asked. “Can you do that for me?”
You swallowed hard — what were the chances that someone would hear you? You had no idea. “Yeah, whatever you want, just fuck me.”
“Whatever I want? That’s a dangerous thing to say.” He moved around behind you, making you flinch when you felt his cock align with your dripping entrance. The anticipation was driving you insane. “Might have to see if you’re up for it another time.” 
There was an answer somewhere in your mind — you could swear there was — but it was quickly forgotten the second that Jungkook pushed himself inside you. The drag of his cock was a delicious torture, streching you out and filling you up to the brim until you were shaking under his touch, both of you moaning at the sensation. 
“Oh my god.” You breathed out, hands turning into fists on the table. Your cheek was pressed against the polished wood, hot breath creating small white clouds on the surface. 
Jungkook released a shaky sigh when he felt you clenching around him, your body desperately trying to move closer to him. “Fuck, baby,” he hissed, his hands holding onto your hips for dear life. Gradually, he moved himself away from your pussy just so he could slam back inside, marveling on the way you trembled at the feeling, crying out his name in the prettiest of whimpers. “Your pussy is so fucking tight. Squeezing my cock so well.” 
Took you only an instant to realize that you were absolutely addicted to the feeling of his cock inside you, the heavenly push of his hardness in and out of you as he slowly started to set a pace. “Oh my god, I’m—” a pitiful hiccup interrupted you, turning your voice into a sharp cry. “That’s so good, Jungkook.”
Jungkook chuckled behind you, his thrusts starting to pick up speed. Your eyes closed in endless bliss, every part of your brain focused on the sensation of his fat length stretching you up. “Told you I’d be, not my fault you didn’t believe me,” he said, but you could tell that his confidence had started to wear itself thin — he, too, seemed to be much more focused on the way that your bodies met. “Do you touch yourself, princess?”
You almost didn’t know how to answer him, a deep heat rushing up to your cheeks. “W-What?”
“When you’re alone, baby,” he practically hissed. You were bouncing on the table then, your body jerking up and down as he fully pistoned his cock inside your heat. “Do you play with your little pussy?”
“Y-yes,” you stammered, embarrassed. “S-Sometimes.” 
“Show me how you do it,” he requested in-between huffs, lust dripping from every syllable. Jungkook spoke to you like a siren, effortlessly inducting you to comply with everything he wanted. “Come on. Don’t be shy, I wanna see you play with yourself for me.” 
You didn’t even know if what you were feeling was shyness, but there was a veil of hesitation that covered your actions. As your hands moved downwards, one of them clenching around the fabric of your dress and pulling it up while the other trailed over your mound, you felt strangely vulnerable, exposed. At the same time, you wanted to do what he asked you to, wanted him to wash you over with compliments until your mind was going blank. 
So you closed your eyes and focused on the sensation of two of your fingers coating themselves in your wetness, then their pressure on your clit. You whined at the feeling, pleasure exploding in your veins as you started to rub yourself, tracing small circles on your sensitive spot. There was no way you could ever reach that sensation again, the sweet motions of your fingers combining perfectly with the thrusts of his hard, fat cock inside you. You were doomed. 
“That’s it… just like that, baby,” Jungkook whispered, obsessed with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him. You had gotten so tight that he thought he would see heaven at any second now. “Feels good?” 
“Y-Yeah, so good...” you struggled to get out, “feels amazing, Jungkook.” 
“So perfect for me,” his praise shot straight up to your core, making you mewl under him. God, the way that you were tightening around him was going to drive him insane. “You feel so fucking good, I can’t stop fucking you.” 
Jungkook took one of his hands to your neck, using it to guide your body upwards until you had your back pressed against his chest; his hot lips assaulting your neck. The new position made it so much easier for his cock to drill inside you, reaching even deeper and hitting sweet spots you didn’t even know you had. It wasn’t long before you were moaning out, eyes fluttering shut as the pleasure overtook you. 
“Just take a look at that, baby,” his voice broke you out of your hypnotized state.  “Look at you. Such a good slut, just taking everything I’m giving you, touching yourself for my cock… fuck. Could watch you like this forever.” 
You had to take a moment to understand what he was talking about, and then you saw it: the window. It stood silently across the room from you, half open, and the glass combined with the darkness of the night gave a perfect reflection of the two of you. You could see yourself, the mess you had become, as Jungkook pounded in and out of you and your fingers worked on your clit; the darkness of his hungry gaze as he followed the motions of your body against his. 
Even if you cried out at the sight, your body freezed up a little at the thought of someone walking by and seeing that private spectacle. The possibility itself was minimal — the window gave way to the side of the land, where a big, thick fence separated it from the nearby houses; most of the ground covered by large trees and bushes — but it wasn’t zero. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the humiliation that would come from being seen like that. 
He, of course, noticed your change of demeanor right away, and you could see in the faint reflection that he had smirked at that realization. “What is it? Are you worried someone is going to walk by?” Jungkook almost groaned against your ear. His cock continued to pump ferociously in and out of you, and you couldn’t even understand your own thoughts for a moment. “That someone is gonna see you get fucked like a good slut?” 
“It’s not—” a moan cut your sentence short. Not like you knew where you were heading, anyways. 
“No one is gonna see you like this, know why?” Jungkook was grunting, his fingers tightening around your throat. You cried out at the feeling, your cunt clenching around him in a way that got him fucking you even harder. “Cause this is all for me. Just for me.” 
Then he was pushing you back on the table, your chest crashing against the wooden surface and his hands yanking you by the waist. Jungkook was fucking you so hard that your worries left you as soon as they arrived, your mind a turmoil of desires and broken exclamations that didn’t give space to anything else but him. 
“You look fucking gorgeous like this, stuffed with cock,” he marveled at the sight. There was a known wave of pleasure hovering over you, ready to crash at any given moment, and you stopped rubbing yourself just so you could prolong its arrival. “Wanna see you cum for me, make a mess for me, baby.” 
The words left you in a confusing, broken order, “Jungkook, I can’t… too much… can’t...” 
“Shhh, you can,” he was slowly easing you into your orgasm, his cock drilling in and out of your pussy. Jungkook fucked like a machine, fast and precise, and you didn’t think you’d be able to forget that anytime soon. “You told me you could take it, so now you’re gonna take it. Don’t you wanna be good for me?” 
“I- I want to… I’m so close,” you cried out, pressing your forehead against the table. You didn’t know how it hadn’t broken yet, with the way that Jungkook was fucking you so mercilessly hard. “I’m so, so close.”
“Cream my cock, baby, come on,” he urged you on, his member throbbing inside you at the thought. Your legs were so weak that you knew you’d fall facedown on the floor if he wasn’t supporting your weight with his strong arms. “Be a good girl and cream my cock for me.” 
And that was it. That was all that you needed to push yourself over the edge, submerging you in ecstasy and making you squeeze him so deliciously. “J-Jungkook!” You moaned out his name again and again, unsure of how loud you were being, but also not caring as much as you should. Jungkook realized he loved hearing you call his name more than anything else. “Fuck! Oh my god!”
“That’s it, baby,” he moaned back, his thrusts a sloppy, uncoordinated mess. He was hypnotized by the view of your cunt hugging him, your wetness dripping down your thighs as you rode out the last seconds of your orgasm. “Pussy’s so fucking tight, so fucking perfect— gonna cum too.” 
You gasped out at the sensitivity that was starting to spread, every movement shaky as you tried to push yourself against him. “Yes, please.” You looked over your shoulder, meeting his hooded gaze. Jungkook looked like a god, his dark hair sweaty and messy and his lip trapped between his teeth. That image would plague you forever. “Cum inside me, please.” 
He groaned loudly, eyes closing for a second. “Fuck, that’s so fucking hot,” he hissed, chest heaving with anticipation. You knew he was close, everything pointed to that, and all that you wanted was to see him reach his high, using your body like it was just a doll for him to fuck. “Didn’t know you’d want to be filled up with cum, princess.” 
“I’m full of surprises.” You smiled — a pretty, fucked-out smile that got Jungkook grunting like a madman. “I want your cum inside me, Jungkook, please.” 
“Gonna fuck you full of my cum, don’t worry— Shit.” The sounds he was making were heavily: those breathy, high-pitched moans that echoed all around you; broken by deep grunts that had your thighs shaking. Jungkook fucked himself in you like he was meant for it, throwing his head back and closing his eyes as he finally found his orgasm. “Fuck! That’s it, fuck—”
Jungkook called out your name and mixed it with praises and curses when he came, spilling himself inside your pussy. You sighed at the feeling, taking in the blissful sensation of having his hot cum spilling out of you, dripping down your legs as he continued to thrust inside you, milking out his orgasm. 
At last, he started to wince from sensitivity. His body collided against your back, his heavy breathing fanning your neck as he tried to collect himself. “Fuck, baby,” he mumbled, “you’re amazing.” 
“You’re not so terrible yourself.” You could not help the smile that appeared on your lips, nor the way that you melted against the surface of the table, drowning in his heat. 
Still, you couldn’t stay there for much longer: it was already a miracle that no one heard the chaos going on in that room, and you weren’t trying to push your luck for the night. Especially since you had a pile of homework (and possibly — now cold — takeout) waiting for you at home. 
You raised your body, leaning against your elbows. “I have to leave,” you told him, taking one of your hands to lay on top of his tattooed one, trying to ease his grip from your waist. “Now if you could just…” 
“Shhh, shhh,” Jungkook hushed, unrelenting. He was much stronger than you, and your muscles were too weak for you to try and do much, so you eventually gave up. “Stop moving. Let me feel you around me for just a bit more.” 
You frowned. “Why?”
“I like it,” he said simply. His breath was a faint caress against the skin of your neck, and you didn’t have much fight left in you. “We all have our tastes.” 
You rolled your eyes. “You’re so weird.”
“Don’t kinkshame.” Jungkook pouted, then pressed a kiss against your shoulder. “You just begged me to fuck you in a church, remember?” 
“Yeah, I guess I don’t have much place to judge.” You laughed dryly, then looked over your shoulder. “Why is your cock still hard? How long is this gonna take?” 
Jungkook groaned, clearly annoyed. “Shut up and enjoy the moment.” 
The so-called moment lasted about two more minutes (which was kind of impressive, you thought) before Jungkook softened and slipped out of you. You hated to admit but you kind of liked the feeling of having him still inside you, completing you as his lips danced around your neck; fingers tenderly playing with your hair. You never thought Jungkook would be so gentle after fucking you like that, but you guessed that you weren’t the only one that was full of surprises. 
Jungkook, apparently, also liked to admire his work. After he had slipped out of you, he made you sit back on the table just so he could stare at his own cum dripping out of you, a glimmer of satisfaction in his dark gaze. He had pushed his white release back inside you and smirked up at you, asking, ever so kindly, for you to go home like that, filled with his cum. 
You, of course, promptly accepted it. 
“By the way,” he called when you two had already stepped out of the church, enveloped by the coldness of the night. There was only one solitary light pole illuminating his features, making him look like one of the saints in the chapel — nothing but fake advertisement, in your opinion. “Wanna know how much I got in that immunology test?”
“How much?” You asked. 
“Eighty two.” Jungkook smiled brightly then, and you found yourself joining him. “Never saw a grade so high in my life. And that counts all the times I’ve cheated too.” 
“Seems like the tutoring sessions are paying off.” You crossed your arms before your chest, the hem of your dress swirling around your knees. The night was weirdly peaceful after everything that had taken place. 
“They are.” He nodded. “I’m looking forward to the next one. Helps that my tutor is kind of a hottie too.”
You scoffed. “So I’ve heard.”  
“And, by the way?” 
“Yeah?”
“You would look better without it.” He pointed at your dress, a sly smile already sprouting on his lips. “Hope to see it next time.”
“Good night, Jungkook.” You rolled your eyes, already turning around — yeah, like there would ever be a next time. 
BAD INFLUENCE COLLECTION
TAGLIST: 
@taehyungieskith​ @fan-ati--c​ @btstrasht​ @crazy4myself​ @sashimi-mochi @ft-multi @kooafraid @dianaaviny @ggukkieland @cryinginmypromdress @kissestothesky
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backandimbamon · 3 years
Note
Plzz write Bamon + their baby :)
i’ve never written about this!!! ty for the prompt this was so fun to think about (: <33 ask + u shall receive!!
….
Sometimes, Damon can’t believe it.
Life is a very funny thing, both haha funny and strange funny, and it’s moments like these where he sits and reflects on the doors that he’s opened, the doors he’s closed, the ones where he’s stayed a while, kicked off his shoes, grabbed some wine, and never ever left.
Bonnie is meeting him for movies and popcorn, their typical Sunday routine, only this is no ordinary Sunday because Friday, he broke up with Elena. Bonnie is supposedly emotional support though he keeps it to himself that he doesn’t need it. He will milk every ounce of affection he can out of his bestie if it means she’ll stay a while longer.
Just like that, everything that he fought hard for he decides to let go because despite the incredible sex and history Elena and Damon have… things still aren’t…right. With every obstacle out of the way, the house quieter, just the two in each other’s presence, it is loud that they will probably never mesh well.
Plus, even a few years after Stefan’s death, Damon notices the room in her heart for him shrinks in size and maybe it’s the fact that the only common ground they have now is Bonnie Bennett- everyone else is either dead or annoying enough that Damon refuses to discuss them, (Caroline, Matt, Jeremy,) they can’t talk about Stefan since his absence still hurts too much. And while Elena is a tad exhausted by only chatting about “his little witch,” Damon can go on and on for days.
Like word vomit, he’s all Bonnie this and Bonnie that in discussions to the point where he’s inwardly cringing at himself but he just can’t stop.
“You know she was my best friend first,” Elena says to him one day after he fusses about Bonnie not answering her phone within the first three rings. There’s a strange look in her expression that perturbs Damon- of course he knows that. Of course.
“Yeah, yeah, but I could’ve been dying over here. I could’ve already been dead. You know she doesn’t have anything to live for if I’m not around,” he jokes snidely.
Elena is folding clothes in the laundry room, she doesn’t laugh or look at him, just continues bending dried garments into a convenient, placeable stack.
Tough crowd.
….
“You ever thought about… I don’t know…? Dating?” Alaric says this, a glass of golden whiskey to his mouth before he knocks it back down his throat and the only thing that’s left is the large, sparkling ice cube. When he slaps the glass down, the ice klinks characteristically. It’s been perhaps a month or two since Damon and Elena’s split.
“Me and Judgey? Are you insane? That’s my-“
“Best friend. Yeah. Everyone’s aware.”
Damon’s brows knot up in confusion, and his eyes hold an expression of disbelief.
“It’s Bonnie,” He says, blue eyes twinkling with an almost believable mirth like he thinks it’s a joke that Alaric would even ask.
“It is.” He confirms.
A minute passes of Damon rubbing the back of his neck, Ric staring aimlessly at his empty glass before he speaks up again.
“So you haven’t… you know…”
“What?” Damon makes a hand gesture of the obviously forbidden word before shaking his head vehemently. “Of course not.”
“Oh, I know that. I was going to ask if you’ve ever…thought about it?”
Bonnie? With her legs wrapped around his waist as he makes every inch of his dick disappear into her hot and gushy anatomy? So deep inside her that their hips touch?
He clears his throat.
“Of course not.” Damon repeats.
….
It’s a momentary lapse of judgement-the kiss- and when she doesn’t reciprocate or move at all, really, the awkwardness is a brick that sinks in the bottom of his stomach.
Leaf green eyes and a beating heart too panicky to be calm but she just brushes it all away like eraser marks on a timed essay.
Damon never imagines rejection to be so simple that he can just pretend that it never happened. He takes the exit and sits back in friend zone where he’s always belonged.
Things are kinda sorta normal for a week.
….
“Truth or dare?” Bonnie suggests that they play it and on queue, Damon throws out sexual innuendo in an insert-line-here-fashion. She cringes, rolls her eyes, tries not to laugh.
Normal.
But then she dares him to kiss her again and things are so far from normal that somehow they end up in bed together, completely naked, and completely wild.
And God, Bonnie begs, pleads, when she’s under Damon but when she gets on top, it’s him that’s asking for permission.
“Fuck, Bon,” he mumbles before leaving a long stream of cursive inside of her.
Their eyes are crystallized, perhaps it’s the moonlight.
….
He shouldn’t feel this betrayed when he hears it, the second heartbeat, but something inside of him snaps.
“Found another best friend?” Damon asks, they haven’t had sex since that wonderful, miraculous night a little over one month ago but the sexual tension between them is as taut as a rubber-band.
She laughs, not noticing the pain in his tone. “With what time?”
It’s a solid question. He’s had Bonnie to himself practically every evening, her stuff is vicariously thrown around the house; she’s in all the rooms at once.
But there’s undeniably an extra heartbeat, he hears it with each pause, each breath she takes, the incessant thump.
“Um,” Damon’s tumbler slips out of his grasp and crashes to the floor.
Bonnie backs away from the mess.
“Um?”
….
Pregnant Bonnie is his favorite Bonnie, from her cravings, to her glow, to her new abundance of cleavage. The two of them can’t stop thinking how this could be, how their lives keep getting stranger and stranger, how nature keeps being redefined, and the rules keep bending and breaking.
Her new favorite things are chocolate chip cookies with salty chips baked in, chocolate-and honey-covered strawberries, spicy sausages, pickle juice.
His hands find their new home in rubbing Bon’s baby bump until she drifts off into a nap.
When her breathing gets heavier indicating she’s in a deep sleep he says into her hair, “You should marry me.”
And he means it.
….
Luna Bennett-Salvatore arrives with soft brown skin and Heterochromia iridum: one ice blue eye and one leaf green one.
Damon nicknames her Bam since Bonnie decides to scrap his name suggestion altogether.
“Bamon! It’s our names combined,”
“No.”
“But what if-“
“No.”
And Luna aka Bam grows very fast. She smiles a lot. Babbles a lot. To Bonnie’s dismay, she says “dada” first.
“Look at Daddy’s Girl,” he says, holding his princess high in the air. “You know what, Bam, I better not say that too loud. Mommy was Daddy’s Girl before you.”
“Oh my God,” Bonnie mumbles, hiding her smile.
She likes to fall asleep with her little arms hugging Bonnie’s neck, the side of her face pressed against hers.
“Don’t be jealous,” Bonnie says when Damon crosses his arms.
“Jealous?” He tsks. “I can do that too,” He bundles Bonnie and Luna up in his arms. “you should marry me,” he says into her hair.
And he means it.
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pattie-remembers · 2 years
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How do you think Pattie remembers George?
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Thinking back to when she first met him, She remembered the moment she fell in love with George. They’d been talking over lunch the first day they’d met on the set of the movie, A Hard Day’s Night, and suddenly he’d grinned at her. She didn’t remember what she’d said to make him laugh, but her heart was gone at that smile. Oh, he was charming and funny and handsome. But that smile. She didn’t really know him well and it would be many long weeks before she finally realized that smile was just for her.
It took George longer to fall in love. Oh, sure he liked her, wanted her, lusted after her, but it wasn’t until they had made love one night in Ireland that she knew he was smitten. Hot love. Kinky love. The deepest sweetest love that was his true nature. And as quiet as they could be. She knew it was serious when he murmured into her hair where her fringe started, “Let’s not let John and Cyn hear.” Her tummy had done a huge flip. His voice was low and husky, and his breath warm and close before his mouth found hers. They hadn’t needed practice from the very first kiss, but over time, the kissing had gotten so much better. So intense. The prelude to the real loving.
It was a challenge she hadn’t expected. She been thinking the words over and over as he thrilled her beyond any expectations or previous experience. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. That is when he said it, so softly she wondered if she had imagined it. She hoped she hadn’t said out loud first. “Pattie.” Her name was an almost silent moan. She was delirious with happiness even before he’d added, “I love you.” He held her while they slept. His arms around her waist, legs over hers. His chest and thighs up against her backside, making them one. Waking her up with his lips on her shoulder finally making his way up slowly and softly right behind her ear when his kisses paused, he whispered, “I love you, girl.” She shivered when he said girl, and turned in his arms and kissed him down his belly and gave him the best blow job she could. He must have liked it. Loved it , because, well she could tell. He hadn’t moaned or made any noise. And when he came, she swallowed it without even thinking, like Mary Bee had made her swear she would. It wasn’t awful, like she had imagined. Well, she couldn’t stop herself from smiling. He pulled her over and they laid in bed kissing and kissing until the knock at the door let them know breakfast was ready.
Pattie noticed he didn’t eat eggs or want a sausage, just cups of hot tea and toast. Quite a bit of toast. Toast dripping with butter and jam.
From that morning he wooed her with a persistence that would have broken Brigette Bardot. He was kind, thoughtful, generous. Yes, he put his feet on the furniture, but otherwise he had good manners, when he chose to. It would be a few years to realize while they were both terribly moody, she had to go, and be busy. George just wanted to stay home or hole up inside of himself. He did love her, though. She knew, because it was almost 5 years before he cheated on her with that French bitch. She always worried that Charlotte wasn’t the first, but she never asked and he never told her and now she would never know.
That time he’d called and asked could he stop by, he had some things he wanted to give her. He’d been to see Ringo and as he was near by, would she mind. Of course not! She was thrilled to see him. Looking older but just as handsome and sexy as always. When he wondered if they could lie in bed and talk, she said sure, that familiar butterfly fluttering in her chest. But really, all he’d wanted to do was laugh and reminisce about the early days. And soon they were cuddled together only this time she spooned up against his back with her arms around him. It was then she noticed how thin he was and soon she just held him as he slept. His hair was shorter than she’d ever remembered. She moved the pillow so she could snuggle close to the crook of his neck without waking him. If she could hold him forever and breathe in the scent of sandalwood, she’d be content.
When he left, he told her he’d see her at Christmas. He and Liv were going on an extended trip. Had she known it was the last time she’d ever see him, she wouldn’t have been able to let him go, but off he went, spraying gravel as he took the turn onto the road, much too fast as usual. All alone she opened his gifts. The plant was new. The statue of Kamadeva and Madana made her smile at what she hoped was his real reason for giving it to her, but when she opened the shoebox and found the photos, the little reels of film, the Polaroids, and the Tiffany perfume bottle he’d given her on her 25th birthday which she’d thought she’d lost when she’d left him, her heart broke a little. But came November, it shattered into a million pieces and she wondered how she could go on living in a world without George.
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archaneanscribe · 3 years
Text
Finally Taking the Trip to Jupiter
Vague spoilers for MGS4. Also xtremely fucking sad fair warning lol
“Snake... Dave?” Hal immediately corrected himself upon entering the room. The veteran’s (finally they could use that term, with there truly being no fights left to fight) request to drop the codenames they had maintained for nearly a decade had been a little sudden, but entirely understandable, “We think we’ve found a place to stay, for the moment. A nice house, close enough to a town that Sunny can go to school in, but far enough ouy most folks will leave us alone.”
David simply nodded- taking a deep breath that would normally be an intake of smoke into his lungs, but he was sincere in his declaration of quitting. Even if it wasn’t for very long, he could do that much for Sunny and Hal, after all this time. The tech wiz stood awkwardly in the doorframe, posture so closed in on himself David would see the gangly nerd he once was before he had started spending more time eating and moving around than seated in front of a computer.
He still did plenty of that, but years on the run had shifted the ratio considerably until just recently.
“Out with it, Hal,” he croaked out in a voice that was becoming increasingly unfamiliar to both of them. This seemed to shock his companion out of his own thoughts, and he finally moved closer.
“Ah, well, you see- what do you want for your last name, Dave? You know I’ll be formalizing Sunny’s adoption, which means we’ll finally be obtaining,” emphasis was put on the word, because in reality it meant forging, “papers for her, and I thought you’d probably be in need of some too. We can use whatever is on your birth certificate, but if you want to pick something out yourself...”
A smile formed under Dave’s mustache.
“I already know what I’m using.”
Hal perked up, “You do? What is it?”
With the same simple, to the point gruffness he would never quite be rid of, the one legendary soldier answered in a single word.
“Emmerich.”
All sounds except the Nomad’s machinery working overtime on her last voyage and David’s unfortunately heavy breathing ceased for an eternally long moment, Hal’s face journeying between every emotion he possessed. Tears pooled at the corners of his eyes, and his attempt to stifle his sniffles failed.
He probably wouldn’t have admitted it at the beginning, but something David had always loved about Hal was his ability to keep crying. No matter the hardships he faced, the traumas, the evils and cruelties he bore witness too, he didn’t run out of tears. His compassion was a well that ran deep, and those tears were just a result of it overflowing.
“Dave...of, of course,” his expression betrayed some amusement past the waterworks, “Do you want me to list you as my brother, or-”
“You know exactly what it’s going to say, Hal.”
They both laughed now, such different sounds than it was just a year ago even. David had been sitting on the edge of the bed, and Hal had been across the room, but that distance closed as Hal kneeled on the floor, placing his hands on David’s knees. It was a gesture that David had previously classified as pitying, but he knew better, now. 
It wasn’t for his comfort at all.
“Thank you, David.”
David had half a mind to ask what it was like to kiss an old man with a mustache, but they didn’t have the time for jokes like that anymore, so he just closed his eyes and enjoyed it.
---
The eyeroll David had given when Hal told him the name of the town they’d be living in was named Jupiter was so legendary it surpassed his previous exploits with ease. But, despite how silly it was, he couldn’t deny the warmth in his chest. 
They’d gotten their trip to Jupiter, just a little late.
Jupiter, Washington, was as small as a small mountain town got. It didn’t even have an elementary school for Sunny to attend (she was bussed to the neighboring, larger town). Most residents were the descendants of the people who had first lived there, so their new faces stuck out for awhile, but they eventually concluded what was essentially the truth, albeit missing some key details, and moved on- they were just two retirees, hoping to live out what was left of the older one’s life in peace with their orphaned granddaughter, nothing exciting.
Hal laughed at how huffy David had gotten at the granddaughter comments.
For the first month, their time there was peaceful. Content. Happy.
The second month, David starting being able to spend less and less time out of bed.
In the third month, he took Hal aside.
“You should stop sleeping in the same bed as me.”
His husband was a genius, he knew exactly why, but he still asked anyway.
“Don’t make me say it.” 
That he didn’t want Hal to wake up one sunny spring morning cuddling a corpse.
Tears were shed, as they always were, but he complied nonetheless. All of David’s belongings were transferred to the guest bedroom (Hal had tried to convince him to stay in the master bedroom, it was more comfortable, but David was adamant- that was where Hal would be staying in the future, and he didn’t want his ghost lingering in the air whenever he slept).
On the first day of the fourth month, right after sending Sunny off to school, Hal told him they were getting a dog for her.
“She loves those chickens, and I thought she might like another pet.”
“Or is it to replace me?” he asked, morbid mirth nearly buried under the pure gravel that had become his voice, “Seems to fit perfectly.”
Hal’s eyes, sad and weary, seemed to want nothing to do with this conversation, but he participated for his partner’s sake, “How so?”
“It’ll bark at strangers, bite the hand that feeds, and just generally be a pain in your ass.”
Despite himself Hal did laugh, not entirely bitter, “We’ll train it better than that.”
“Don’t train it too well. Won’t remind you enough of me.”
Fifth month, they had a dog. Rex, a joke on two layers- a name so common it was funny, and a reminder of one man’s shame that he’d never quite shake off. Not a husky, because while that would please David, they’d be keeping it long term and that level of energy just wouldn’t suit their needs. Rex was an adolescent Golden Retriever. 
The dog of the American dream.
Almost like he could tell David wouldn’t be around long enough to justify getting attached, Rex mostly ignored him. The feeling was mutual. 
Sunny loved them both dearly, and that was enough.
---
They had been there half a year, and Sunny made them breakfast. Her specialty, eggs fried to methodical perfection, toast just a little browner than anyone would like, maple sausage microwaved for ten seconds more than the instructions said just to make sure they were thoroughly cooked, and a glass of pulpless orange juice tucked precariously into the crook of her arm as she carried the meal to Uncle Dave’s bedroom.
It was two minutes after Hal watched Sunny depart from the kitchen that he heard a loud crash, glass and ceramic shattering, followed by Rex’s insistent barking and whining. He was on his feet and rushed to the scene, fearing the worst and finding exactly that.
“Oh, Sunny... Sunny...”
“U-Uncle H-Hal,” she barely managed through her cries. Rex, to his credit, ignored the food on the ground and nuzzled at her face, whining, confused and upset by the noises of unparalleled distress his beloved human was emitting. Stifling his own grief, Hal went over to the young girl and pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly.
He didn’t do a great job at holding that grief in after all.
“Sunny, Sunny, Sunny... I’m so sorry... I should have checked up on him when I woke up... It’s okay, Sunny...”
“H-He’s d-d-dead. J-Just,” her stutter was exacerbated by her choking sobs, “J-Just l-like my m-mother.”
The downside of having such a bright child was that you couldn’t shield them from life’s harsh realities that easily. There was no convincing Sunny that Uncle Dave was with the birds in the clouds, or any other such comforting tale. 
He was dead and gone, and she knew that.
---
The gravestone read:
               David Emmerich
       Beloved father and husband.
All three of those titles were ones he had only worn for six months, but he had worn them with honor.•
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myearts-uwu · 3 years
Text
Bakery AU!
Pairing: Claude x Felix
Featured characters: Claude, Athanasia, Felix, Lily (at the very end of it)
Genre: Fluff. Just... it’s pure fluff in here.
This was supposed to be a single one-shot but I somehow decided to turn it into a short fic that has... two or three parts?
It’s just an adorable AU!
"York's Bakery...," Claude read out the sign displayed above the front door of the cozy-looking bakery. He hummed in disinterest. He was not exactly a huge fan of going out to buy bread or random pastries at a random bakery, let alone a bakery that had been opened for less than three months.
However, since his daughter was the one who asked if they could visit this new bakery together one day during the weekend, he had no choice but to say yes to her favour. It warmed his cold heart when her eyes lit up before smiling at him after he said that.
Why must he be such a softie for his daughter?
"Waa..."
Upon hearing the shaky breath of awe, Claude looked down and noticed the seven-year-old girl staring at the bakery with awe. Her small and chubby hand was holding onto the pinky finger of his left hand loosely.
"You seem to be excited to come here, Athanasia," he commented nonchalantly with a stoic face. He was not the best at showing his true emotions. However, his daughter knew that he was being entertained by her. "I still don't know how you've heard about this bakery, though."
Athanasia just giggled. "Oh, I always see it every day when the driver drives me to school, papa!" she answered. Of course, he wouldn't know about that small fact considering that he had never personally driven her to school. As the CEO of Obelia's Enterprises, he had to go to his office early in the morning. "And since the driver has been to this bakery before, he told me that this bakery's pastries are to die for! Es... Especially the chocolate muffins!" she exclaimed.
"Hm, I see...," Claude mumbled before ruffling Athanasia's soft blonde hair. Compared to the colour of his hair which was a more golden colour, her's leaned more on the lighter side. "Well, let's see if what Mister Han said is true and the pastries here are indeed 'to die for'. Let's go, Athanasia. We don't want to keep standing here, do we?"
Athanasia nodded and skipped towards the front door, tugging her father by his hand. Some random passersby noticed the father-daughter duo and either smiled or chuckled at the adorable scene in front of them.
Claude was about to push the door open but his own daughter had beaten him to it. She had let go of the blond's hand for a few seconds just so she could both of her hands around the door handle. As soon as she pushed the front door open, there was the sound of a small bell ringing.
Ding!
"Welcome to York's Bakery!"
The person standing behind the counter greeted the two newcomers with enthusiasm. Claude stole a small glance at the worker and the only thing he took note of was the messy bright red hair. As well as that large grin on his face that could make anyone's heart melt.
Besides that? He didn't look all that interesting to him.
All he could give the man was a curt nod for he was not someone who enjoyed talking to people.
"Hello!" Unlike him, Athanasia was a total ball of sunshine. She smiled back at the worker and waved at him. The man just chuckled and waved back.
"Why, Hello there, young lady," the man behind the counter said. "How may I help you on this wonderful afternoon?"
Claude gave the man a warning glance and he immediately tensed up. A sign for him to not act so close around the little girl. Times like these made Claude grateful that he had a natural resting bitch face. After that, he acted as if nothing had happened and picked up a tray to put the baked goods he planned on getting on.
Besides the one worker available in the bakery, Claude noticed upon entering the building the strong aromatic scent of freshly baked bread. It tingled his nose slightly due to how heavenly the smell inside the bakery was.
"Uhh... I heard that the chocolate muffins here are to die for! And I wanted to try one!" Athanasia told the man. She walked towards the front counter and pressed her face against the glass of the display case. "Whoa... you have a lot of delicious-looking desserts here."
"Hmm... they do cater a lot of baked goods here," Claude mumbled to himself as he picked out random bread he and his daughter would eat as light snacks. Sausage rolls, croissants, baguettes, buns, egg tarts, cookies... They were really selling a wide variety of baked goods. He grabbed the pair of tongs and started to do his own business.
The worker laughed at Athanasia's adorableness. "They're all freshly made, you know? Well, except for the cakes since we usually have them chilling in the refrigerator overnight." He looked around before winking at her. "But that's a secret between us, alright?" he said in a whisper.
'Someone seems to like that counter worker,' Claude thought when he heard his daughter laughing out loud. He stood in front of a tall basket made from rattan that had baguettes in it. 'Hmm... Athanasia would most definitely eat an entire long baguette as a snack in one sitting... I'm just going to get it for her.'
"You're funny, Mister!" Athanasia exclaimed while taking her hand out towards him. "My name is Athy and that grumpy man who's picking out the baked goods there is my papa!"
"... Grumpy?" Claude turned around and looked absolutely offended by how Athanasia introduced him to a random stranger. Him? Grumpy? Sure, he was not a huge fan of social interaction but that did not mean that he was entirely grumpy.
It only made him even more annoyed when the guy was laughing with her.
"Now, Miss Athy. It's rude to call your own father grumpy," he told her before gently holding her small hand to shake it. "My name is Felix, by the way. If you were wondering about my name, that is."
"Oh, I already knew what your name is," she said before pointing on the nametag that was pinned to the beige apron Felix wore.  "It's written on that nametag thingy."
"... Oh, I actually forgot that I had my nametag on me," Felix stated in slight embarrassment. He scratched the back of his head. "You have good eyes, Miss Athy."
"Athanasia."
The girl turned around to look at her father. "Yes, papa?"
"Have you picked out everything you want yet?" Claude asked while smirking. After placing the tongs in their original place, he put his free hand on his waist. "You don't want to return home without those muffins and cupcakes and cookies you were talking about before coming here now, do you?"
"Eh?! But papa, there's just so many things that I wanna try here!" Athanasia cried out. Her eyes darted around the baked goods inside the display case. "Ahh, I really wanna try those chocolate muffins... but the chocolate chip cookies look so good... Oh, but... but look at those macarons! And- And those chocolate bars with dried up fruits..."
Felix looked down at the indecisive girl and looked up at Claude. He laughed weakly. "I assume that your daughter has a strong liking to chocolate?" he asked.
"She's addicted actually," Claude answered before placing the tray on the front counter. He was going to have to pay for all these twice if Athanasia was still deciding on what she should get. "She actually had one of her teeth pulled out at the dentist last year because of a bad cavity. She kept denying that her tooth wasn't aching... but she always teared up whenever she ate anything."
Felix snorted while Athanasia looked at her father as if he had betrayed her. Which, in a way, he did.
"Papa, you promised you won't talk about that to anyone," Athanasia whined with a cute pout. She humphed. "I'm not going to talk to papa anymore!"
"Is that so?" With a calm expression on his face, Claude pulled out his wallet. "Well, good luck paying for all those desserts, then."
"Papa!" she whined again, earning more laughter from the man behind the counter.
He may not look it, but Claude knew how to be humourous... occasionally.
"M-My, you two are quite a hilarious duo," Felix commented while wiping away a tear from laughing too much. He went to the cash register to collect the blond's payment. The girl would eventually tell them what she wanted soon enough.
Claude looked around the bakery while Felix placed the baked goods he paid for into a large paper bag. "Are you the only one working here?" he asked, trying to make some light conversation even though he was not the best when it came to starting one.
"Oh, heaven's no. I'm way too inexperienced to be left working at a bakery all alone," Felix answered with a smile. "There are more people working here, believe it or not. The owner of the bakery, Lilian, is usually working behind the scenes in the kitchen. The same goes for the other ladies working here. Since I'm not that good at baking anything, I'm in charge of the front counter. Greeting customers, making sure everyone is content with the bakery's atmosphere, making sure no one steals anything from here... the usual stuff."
Felix was indeed a talker.
"... Uh-huh," was Claude's awkward response.
"Mister Felix! Mister Felix!" Athanasia called out.
Felix and Claude looked at the little girl. "Hm? Found something you like, Miss Athy?"
"... Can I get a chocolate muffin and those chocolate chip cookies? They look really tasty?"
"Of course. Oh, one moment, Sir."
"Take your time."
Claude looked at Felix who knelt down to grab a muffin as well as scooping out the cookies before putting them in separate smaller paper bags. When Athanasia approached him, he petted her head. "I thought you'd buy the whole bakery because of how indecisive you are when it comes to food."
"But papa, if I do that, then what will they sell afterwards? I don't wanna ruin their business!" Athanasia grinned innocently.
"... Well, isn't that nice of you?" Claude responded sarcastically.
Felix couldn't help but chuckle at them. "Here're your cookies and muffin, Miss," he said as he leaned forward to give the small bags to the girl after calculating the whole price of everything with the cash register.
"Yay!" Athanasia snatched the paper bags from Felix's hand. She immediately opened the bag with the cookies and pulled one out before munching on it.
Claude sighed. "Athanasia, can't you just wait for a few more minutes?" he asked her sternly. "At least eat the cookies once I'm done paying for everything."
"But... But papa. These cookies are amazing!" Her jewel blue eyes sparkled. There were a few cookie crumbs on her lips and her chubby cheeks were puffed out after eating more of the tasty snack.
Claude's shoulders dropped. "Athanasia... You're dirtying the floor with those cookie crumbs."
Felix had to stifle his own laughter. "That's okay, Sir. I can clean that up afterwards. Besides, your daughter here is obviously enjoying those cookies immensely, right Miss Athy?"
"Mhm!" Athanasia nodded her head, mouth still full with cookies inside.
Well, it was painfully clear to Claude that this worker was already smitten with his daughter... Which he couldn't really blame him for that. Even he had to admit that his daughter was a complete natural at manipulating people with her cute looks and personality.
Claude sighed and was preparing to pull out his money. "How much does everything cost... Felix?"
"That will be... exactly 13000 won."
Claude widened his eyes slightly. "... That's a pretty low price for this much we're getting," he muttered. "Especially for how high-quality everything looks."
Felix thought he had misheard something. "Low price? I... don't mean to be rude but that is a pretty high price. Not to mention that you're buying this many baked goods at once..."
"Papa could have bought everything inside this bakery if he wants to!" Athanasia chimed in. "Because papa is a big boss at a big company! A CEO!"
... Claude had to make a mental note for himself to remind him to teach Athanasia that she should not give out random personal information about either of them to strangers once they return home.
He was expecting Felix to pry more information about him being a CEO out of either him or Athanasia.
But instead, he just acted as if he didn't hear anything.
"Well, even if your father is a CEO of a large company, if he's able to sell out the entire bakery, I'm sure my boss would pass out from shock," Felix joked before pushing the large paper bag with everything Claude bought inside. "Funny story, she actually did end up passing up from shock after we were given our first ever large cake order for a wealthy child's birthday party."
"Well, I sincerely hope she won't end up passing out if more people end up ordering cakes and other pastries from this bakery," Claude responded. "She might have to go to a hospital if that happens a lot."
... Was that supposed to be a joke or something?
Claude cleared his throat from how awkward he suddenly felt and looked down at his wallet to pull out the exact amount of money he needed to pay for everything. "I'm... not that good when it comes to making jokes," he admitted.
"... Oh, that was a joke?" Felix asked.
Athanasia shook her head in disapproval. "Papa, you're terrible at making jokes. This is why people either think you're a serious grumpy man or a socially awkward man."
'When and where did she learn to be so sassy to her own father?' Claude wondered, trying to act calm.
"... Here's the money." He tried to ignore the quiet stare from Athanasia and gave the money to Felix. When he looked at him did he realise that this was the first time they made proper eye contact with each other.
For the first time since coming here, Jewel blue eyes met up with warm grey ones face to face.
Felix froze up all of a sudden, confusing Claude. He tilted his head. "Felix, are you alright?"
A few seconds later, Felix blinked multiple times before realising that he was still at work. There was a faint blush on his face and he smiled nervously. "A-Ah! My apologies," he apologised as he accepted the money. "I was... genuinely stunned at your eyes. I'm sorry if that sounds weird."
Ah, his eyes. It was considered a rare condition and the only people who had it were people in his family. The jewel blue eyes were always associated with the people within the Obelia family. His ancestors, his father, his older brother, his niece, his daughter...
Basically, they all had jewel blue eyes. The reason why? No one had any idea.
"It's alright," Claude reassured Felix. "I'm used to people being surprised by my eye colour."
"Oh, I see... Well...," Felix's words trailed off before putting the money inside the cash register. He then gave him the receipt with a warm smile. "Well, I just thought that your eyes remind me of sapphires somehow. It's nice."
"... Okay then?"
Well, this was a bit awkward.
"Papa, papa!"
"Hm?" After noticing the hem of his shirt being tugged down, Claude looked down and saw his daughter holding out a singular chocolate cookie in front of him. "... Athanasia, you know that I don't like desserts."
"But you might like it! You never know if you hate it unless you try it, papa," Athanasia told him in an as-a-matter-of-fact voice. That sort of statement sounded really weird when it's coming from a seven-year-old child. "The cookies are so delicious! Please, papa? Just one..."
Claude stared at her blankly before looking at Felix who shrugged his shoulders.
'... At least be glad that there are no customers inside other than us,' he thought begrudgingly before going down on one knee so he could be at the same eye level as Athanasia. He opened his mouth and his daughter happily fed him the single cookie. He then stood up and slowly munched on the sickeningly sweet and crunchy snack.
...
...
...
"It tastes... alright, I guess," Claude mumbled, his voice slightly muffled by the cookie in his mouth.
"See? What did I tell you? I knew you'd like it!" Athanasia said proudly with her arms folded across her chest.
Felix smiled at the girl's energetic demeanour. It seemed to Claude that he was wondering how such a small ball of energy came from someone who looked like he'd rather stay at home all day.
"Your relationship with your daughter is adorable, sir," Felix commented.
"It's Claude."
"Pardon?"
"My name. What? Since you did give my daughter your name and my daughter gave hers to you, might as well join in to not feel so left out, right?"
"O-Oh... Mister Claude?" Felix tried to say his name.
"Just drop the 'Mister'. Judging by your appearance, I wouldn't be surprised if we're around the same age," Claude told him.
"... As you wish... Claude... Ah, I'm sorry but it does feel a bit embarrassing for me to call you so casually like that when this is our first time meeting, haha!"
'... Hm. That's weird," Claude thought while he silently stared at the red-haired man who was running his fingers through his hair. For a moment he thought his heart skipped a beat. It was most likely his own mind playing tricks on him.
"If that's the case, then feel free to add in 'Sir' before saying my name," Claude said casually. He looked at his wristwatch and knew that it was time for him and Athanasia to leave this bakery. Annoyingly for him, his older brother Anastacius and his daughter Jennette were coming over soon in the evening and he had to... mentally prepare himself in order to deal with his brother.
"Well, Felix. We'll be taking our leave for today," he said before calling out Athanasia who was looking at the desserts in the display case. "Athanasia, it's time to go. Remember, your cousin is coming over."
"Okay!" Athanasia exclaimed before rushing towards him. She almost tripped but fortunately, she managed to grab Claude's shirt in time to prevent herself from falling. Giggling, she turned around and waved at Felix. "Goodbye, Mister Felix! It was nice talking to you!"
"Bye-bye, Miss Athy." Felix waved back.
Claude pulled the front door open and was about to leave the bakery but he stopped in his tracks when he heard Felix calling him.
"Sir Claude?"
"Hm?"
Claude turned his head around and looked at Felix with a surprised expression when he smiled warmly at him. A smile that would make anyone feel comforted just by looking at it.
"I hope you have a wonderful day. And please come again!" Felix said. It was something he'd say to every single customer who'd leave the bakery.
But there was something about the way he said that made it sound like he was actually looking forward to seeing Claude again.
And for some reason, Claude felt a bit... flattered by that.
"... Of course," was all he could say before leaving the bakery with his daughter. After the door closed behind them, the father-daughter made their way to his Mercedes-Benz.
The trip to the car was quiet. Athanasia was happily munching on her chocolate muffin while Claude was deep in thought about something.
"... I suppose we can make time to visit the bakery from time to time every Saturday...," Claude mumbled, still deep in thought. 'That Felix guy is quite an amusing fellow to be around.'
"Eh?!" Athanasia looked up at her father in complete shock.
That was obviously wonderful news for the girl because she really loved the snacks there.
***
Ten minutes had passed since Claude and Athanasia left the building.
"I heard a lot of laughter coming from here," Lily said as she came out of the kitchen to check up on her employee and close friend. Felix was busy sweeping the floor with a broom to get rid of the cookie crumbs on the floor. The brunette smiled and placed her hands on her hips. "You're whistling. Did something good happen to you just now?"
Felix slowly turned his head around to look at Lily. There was a goofy smile present on his handsome face. "If you consider a pretty man coming in here with his cute daughter and he's like... really pretty that you can't stop staring at him as a good thing? Then yes, something good did happen."
"... Ah, so you're in love with a customer. That's a first."
Felix chuckled to himself. "Ahh... I really do hope that they come here more often soon."
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redrobin-detective · 3 years
Text
all's well that ends well to end up with you
I actually wasn’t planning on contributing to the Danny Phantom Side Hoes Week (great name I love it) but I had this in the back of my head so I figured it was a good opportunity. The prompt was Sam and Happiness. ____________________________________________
Sam wasn’t sure when she had become so comfortable with her two best friends, when she had learned to tolerate, even appreciate, their idiosyncrasies. The easy answer is it started with the portal, with Danny’s powers and the resulting responsibilities that resulted and it was true in a way. But Sam can’t help but wonder if, even without that, if they would have ended up like this anyway. 
“Hey, what movie are we doing tonight?” Danny asked, falling onto the couch next to her and leaning his full body weight onto her. His head rested languidly on her shoulder, perfectly at ease as his hair ghosted across her collarbone. 
The natural chill from his body leeched into her. She used to hate the cold, hate how it withered her plants along with all of her energy. Up until high school, she slept most nights with heavy blankets, warm socks and the heat turned up high. But Danny developed an ice core and without even realizing it, the cold turned from an annoyance nuisance to a cool comfort. She leaned into his freezing touch, relaxing from the now familiar sensation.
“Something funny please,” Tucker begged, sitting on her other side. Their shoulders were flush against one another but neither of them moved. “Things have been too heavy lately, home boy needs to chill out.”
“Sure thing, bud,” Danny grinned, leaning over to brush his freezing fingers along the back of Tucker’s neck. Tuck didn’t flinch and shy away like he used to, instead leveling Danny with a dry look that was ruined by the small smile. Sam wasn’t the only one who had learned to love the cold. 
“Dude, that joke stopped being funny sophomore year,” Tucker said with an eyeroll. “But my point stands, please pick a comedy oh merciful deity Sam.” Tucker took a bite from his pizza, a horrible meat monstrosity with ham and sausage and pepperoni. So close to her, the smell wafted over her way and she wrinkled her nose but didn’t say anything. 
“You got to pick last week,” Sam said with a raised eyebrow. “And you unjustly used your power to subject us to an Adam Sandler movie.”
“Ironically,” Tucker insisted with a wry grin. Without being prompted, he passed her a slice of her vegetarian pizza and Danny his pepperoni and pineapple. The local shops must have their orders memorized by now, one pizza split three radically different ways. It would probably be more efficient to order different boxes but they just didn’t do separate. “Plus that movie’s a classic, we never did finish it. We could-”
“You get your turn the week after next,” Danny insisted, “Sam gets to pick tonight.” He glanced up at her through his bangs, “but if you happen to choose a horror movie I wouldn’t complain.”
“Dude, don’t we get enough of that in our normal lives?” Tucker said, rolling his eyes even as he adjusted himself so his legs were over the side of the couch and his back was up against Sam’s arm. He must have seen her distaste at the smell of his pizza and moved to block it. 
Truthfully, she’d left her near manic hatred of meat behind in freshman year. She could credit maturity or just changing tastes but really it just became exhausting arguing with him over something so pointless. While she won’t ever like meat, she did like Tucker and accepting his differences from her, the things that made him happy, was an easy transition to make. 
“Yeah but its so exaggerated and the people being hunted are so stupid that it makes my dumbass mistakes look genius in comparison,” Danny chuckled, eating the toppings off his pizza first like the unnatural abomination he was. “But seriously Sam, it’s your pick. I get to choose next week.”
“Stop being such a gentlemen Danny and help me bully Sam,” Tucker grumbled, leaning around so his head was practically in her lap to stick his tongue out at Danny who reciprocated in kind. She was a young woman with two boys half lying on top of her and she had never felt so safe and secure in her life.
“Like either of you could tell me what to do,” Sam sniffed despite the blatant lie. Those two had her wrapped around their fingers but she knew they felt the same about her. She wasn’t a kid anymore and soulmates seemed like such an overused term but it was hard to find another word that fit them so well. “We’re watching Cabin in the Woods so everyone shut up.”
“A horror-comedy with a dash of trope subversion? Nice pick,” Tucker smirked up at her with a knowing look because he got it too. Danny, eternally clueless, just hummed in approval. He looked a little sleepy there on her shoulder and she doubted he would make it past the opening sequence. They rarely finished movies these days, but that’s not what weekly movie nights were about, not really.
Danny nodded off, still slumped onto her shoulder, about 15 minutes in. By now, his chill had sunk deep into her and she leaned into that familiar touch. Tucker had long since finished his pizza and ended up with his head up against her thigh. Her fingers rested comfortably on the junction between his neck and shoulder, playing lightly with his hairline. He fell asleep about midway through, just as the monsters came into play. Her two boys, two thirds of her soul, cuddled on top of her and peacefully asleep. This is why they never finished movies anymore, the comfort of each other’s presence being more than enough for them to be lulled to sleep.
She felt her own eyelids drifting and she turned down the volume and settled herself in. She never slept half as well as she did in her warm, expensive bed than she did on a couch surrounded by her friends. Someday they’d need to talk about this, figure out what they were and what they would do about it. Everyone already thought they were already dating but it was much deeper, more complex then that. But for now there was only the drone of the movie, Danny’s cold muscle on one side and Tucker’s bony warmth on the other. 
Happiness like this wasn’t found, it was built up bit by bit with trust and love and understanding. So long as she had her friends, no matter how bad things got, it would work out. She fell asleep with the dual temperatures of her boys leaving her in perfect equilibrium.
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justsparklingwords · 4 years
Note
I absolutely love your style of writing, so you think you could do a jealous Ron weasley x reader smut/ fluff ending! 🤍
Warnings: smut obviously, slight dom!Ron, slight angst, dirty talk, jealousy
A/N: it’s been so long since I’ve written this much and I loved every second of it. Hope you all enjoy :)
Ron had been looking for you for hours. He searched the Great Hall, the common room, and even the Black Lake. The last place he could think of searching was the library. He walked through the isles to see if you were in any, but instead found Hermione and Ginny studying.
“Oh hi, Ron. What’re you doing in the library?” asked Hermione. “I thought you said studying was arid?”
Ron scoffed, “I didn’t say studying was ‘arid’ I said studying was boring and uninteresting.”
Hermione looked at Ginny and rolled her eyes.
“Right. Well, what’re you doing here then?”
Ron sat next to them, “I’m looking for y/n. Have you seen her today?”
“How should we know? She’s your girlfriend.” Ginny remarked.
“Oh cmon! Help a brother and friend out. I know you both were with her this morning. Did she say where she was going?” Ron was ready to get on his knees and beg.
“Check the quidditch field. I saw her and Dean heading there about an hour ago.”
Dean? Why would y/n be with Dean? Yeah, they’re friends, but Ron didn’t think they were that close of friends; to be hanging out alone..and without him.
“What’s wrong, Ron?” asked Ginny.
“Yeah, you’re turning as red as your hair.” Hermione added.
“I gotta go.” Ron quickly got out of his seat, stumbling as he did so. Why was he feeling so angry? Speed walking down the hall and to the quidditch field, Ron saw you and Dean sitting criss cross facing each other in the middle of the field. He noticed how your head was tilted back due to laughter. He also noticed how Dean was admiring you with a huge smile on his face. Ron stomped over to where you and Dean were sitting and sat down himself, laughing along with you both in a bit of a sarcastic way.
“Hahaha! You’re SO funny, Dean, anyway what’s up, love?” He put his arm around you.
“Hi, Ron! Dean was just telling me about the time he won a pie eating contest when he was only 9 years old.” you giggled as you spoke.
Dean giggled along with you and turned to Ron, “You should’ve seen it mate, I was getting so full that cherry filling was coming out of my nose!”
“Pfft. That’s it? One time, I ate fifteen sausages in less than five minutes and I even threw up after.” Ron said smugly.
You and Dean both stared kind of blankly at him. “Riiiight, well anyway, even though I had cherry snot, I got second place!”
“Nice!” You gave him a high five and starting telling a food story of your own, but Ron wasn’t paying attention. All he could think is why would you be interested in a guy like Dean? Sure, he was tall and athletic and quite handsome, but so was he. The more he thought about it, the more angry he got.
“...and that’s the reason why I don’t take food offered to me by Fred and George anymor-”
“Right then, I think it’s about time we go. See you later, mate.” Ron stood up and pulled you with him, dragging you by the hand away from a confused Dean and to his dorm.
Once you got there, Ron kissed you fiercely on the lips. You were a bit confused by his sudden actions, he usually took things slow and then gets rough, but you went with it. Your tongues fought for dominance, teeth clash together, lips becoming swollen. You both pull away, taking off articles of each other’s clothing. Ron cups your boobs, running his thumbs over your nipples, feeling them perk up with his touch, making you groan at the feeling.
“Get on your knees.” His voice is husky and you follow his orders. You take his hard cock into your hands and start to slowly pump, enjoying the little whimpers that fall out of his mouth. You lean forward and lick a strip up the underside of his cock, putting it in your mouth completely and bopping your head. His hands grip your hair and pulls it to get the pace he wants.
“Bloody hell, love. You make me feel so good.”
You groan around his cock, sending vibrations through his body like shocks of electricity. He grips your hair even tighter, signaling that he’s close. Before he’s able to cum, he pulls you off of him. Holding your hand, he helps you stand up and pushes you onto his bed.
“Such a pretty sight.”
You blush at his words and hide your face behind your hands.
“Don’t be shy, darling.” Ron gets on top of you and pulls away your hands and holds them up over your head with one hand while the other is gripping his dick. He slides his dick through your folds, gathering up your slick, and easing himself into you. You both moan at the feeling, Ron wasting no time in letting you adjust to his size, but you don’t mind.
“Oh fuck, Ron!” You gasp.
“That’s right, love, say my name. Who’s the only one that can make you feel this good?”
“You, Ron! Only you!” your words come out as gasps, barely being able to speak with Ron’s cock filling you up.
Moans and whimpers surrounded the air around you. You were both so close already, the thought of someone walking into the dorm at any minute helping edge you both on.
“Cum for me, darling, cum for me,” Ron rubbed your clit, his sloppy thrusts getting harder. You both cum with loud moans which you’re both going to probably regret later.
Ron pulls out of you and lays by your side.
“That...was bloody brilliant.”
You turn your head to face him, “It was. But a bit unexpected. It almost seems like you got jealous that I was hanging out with Dean.”
Ron’s eyes get big, “Jealous? Me? No, never.”
You roll your eyes with a slight smile on your face, “Whatever you say, babe.”
Ron pulls you to him, holding you close, and gives you a kiss on your temple. You find it a calming and loving gesture and enjoy this moment with your loving boyfriend.
“I love you, y/n.”
“I love you too.”
A/N: Thank you, anon, for your kind words! I’m glad you enjoy my writing 🥺 I hope this meets your standards. As for requests, I’ve had to close them because I have so many that I need to write and I don’t want to keep anyone waiting too long. Speaking of, I’m sorry it takes me forever to post. College is very stressful and time consuming, but enough about me. Have a wonderful day, my loves 👽♥️
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smaidjor · 3 years
Text
and i pay for my place by the ring (Chapter 1)
Hey guys! Welcome to another angsty fic by yours truly, provider of flower husbands pain.
Some things you should know before you jump into this:
1. This is a companion fic to my fic "i know they're losing". You can understand it without having read the other one, since it's the same story from two different POVs but I think the overall experience is better with both!
2. The overall title of each fic is from the mitski song I bet on losing dogs. Chapter titles are from the Last Goodbye from the Hobbit films.
3. There is a lot of lord of the rings lore in both fics, and I mean a lot. You may be kinda confused if you've never read tolkien's works. It will all be explained eventually, though!
4. With the fact that it's a companion fic and a lot of people came here from Jimmy's POV in mind- this is a lot heavier of a fic. The content warnings are heavier and the angst is more intense. You have been warned.
(Obligatory disclaimer that this is about characters, not ccs, and do not ship real people, as always!)
Chapter Title: to these memories i will hold
Chapter Wordcount: 4000
Content warnings: suicidal thoughts, self-esteem issues, panic attacks, past death, very frank discussion of death. (In general, if suicide or death are triggering topics for you, this is probably not the fic for you. Stay safe and take care of yourself!)
AO3
Actual fic under the cut:
Scott didn’t expect to survive 3rd life. No one did, he thinks, but especially not him. Clever, clever Scott, who knew his fate too well for his own good. He could have chosen his allies carefully, he knows, could have played on their emotions to make them think he was loyal until the moment he turned on them to win. He knew who the strongest factions and warriors were, the most cunning and intelligent participants in this death game they were forced into. Instead, he chose Jimmy. Sweet, dopey Jimmy, who had the personality of a golden retriever and only a handful of braincells at any given time. Jimmy, who was worth more than all the stars in the sky to him. Who made him feel alive . No, Scott didn’t expect to win. Not when it was Jimmy by his side- when it was Jimmy by his side, winning didn’t matter. All that mattered was Jimmy’s blush when Scott pressed a kiss to his cheek, the way his hair looked like gold in the sunlight and his smile lit up Scott’s whole world.
After Jimmy died, Scott stopped wanting to survive 3rd life. What was the point? The stars can shine on without the sun, but all life on Earth would wither and die. The same happened to Scott’s broken, bitter heart, he found. Jimmy was the first person in years to love him truly, wholly, with no strings attached; it was terrifying how quickly Scott fell for the first person to look at him and not expect him to be anything but what he was. Scott’s world, which used to be mountain peaks and endless blue sky, narrowed to warm brown eyes and a grin like sunshine quicker than he could comprehend. Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, it all came back to him. What was Scott without Jimmy? The unwanted twin, the unloved child, the un-elven elf. Because who cared if he was a good shot with a bow or good at organizing teams or building pretty little houses? He would always be second-born, second-best.
It was fitting, really, that when Scott died, he died alone. Some might find it ironic that the man who knew enough people to fill the roster of a championship held by a god every month died without a single person to witness it save his enemies, but in the end, it was always going to be like this, Scott knew. He hadn’t been there to see Jimmy die, he hadn’t been able to hold him in his final moments and soothe the agony of death. Maybe this was his punishment. He wouldn’t be surprised; the gods of this world did not smile on him and never would. Why should they, when he had failed the only person who had ever found him good enough?
When he woke up in Rivendell, he was almost disappointed. Almost. He considered ditching the rest of the elves, up and leaving to somewhere that didn’t make it feel like the noose of immortality was slowly tightening around his neck. If nothing else, Noxite would let him crash at the MCC server for a bit until he found somewhere to go. And yet, in the end, Scott’s stubborn sense of duty won out. The elves needed a ruler. Xornoth had disappeared to god knows where, and though they had been braver, wiser, better in every way, Scott was the one who had stayed. Who was willing to take up the crown that weighed so heavily on its bearers. So Scott, who no one ever expected to rule, took up the burden of leadership.
Now, he tries and fails to get out of bed and wonders what the point of that even was. He’s fading, and worse than that, he’s fading over a human. His ancestors are probably rolling in their graves. Rivendell will be leaderless within a decade, and this time there are no heirs to take control. Not even a ‘spare’ like Scott used to be. What a mess.
There are footsteps on the stairs. They’re unfamiliar, meaning they could be a threat, but he’s too tired to bother sitting up. If he dies, well- it’s inevitable, really, in the same way watching the mortals he loves dies is.
The person comes around the corner, and Scott realizes with no joy that he won’t be dying today after all. Katherine looks both curious and concerned, but her voice tilts towards the latter when she asks “Scott?” and then, more hesitantly  “Lord Smajor?”
He blinks at her, exhausted. “Hi, Katherine.”
“I came to talk to you about some empires stuff, but, I mean, if this is a bad time, I can come back later…?” She sounds so thrown off by his state that Scott almost feels bad.
Whatever it is, it must be important if she’s come all the way here, though, so he gestures her to a chair. “No, no, stay. I can muster the energy for a meeting, just don’t ask me to get up.”
Katherine takes the seat. “I came to talk about the corruption on the server, but- are you okay? Are you sick?”
Nothing about the question is funny in any way, but Scott laughs regardless. “In a way, yes.”
“What do you mean?”
“Take my hand.” He offers it out, knowing the unnatural cold is unsettling no matter if you’re elven or not. Katherine does as he asks, the concern on her face only growing as she grips his icy hand.
“Elves don’t get sick like mortals do,” Scott explains. “Nor do we die of old age. But we get...heartsickness, you might call it. We call it fading in our tongue- the cold hands are a symptom of that. Our souls are fragile, and the grief of the mortal plane can be overwhelming. If an elf is too struck by it, they fade away and die.” The words taste bitter on his tongue, a frank reminder of the slow and painful death that awaits him.
Katherine gasps, and Scott knows he’s alarmed her.
He goes on, though. “It usually happens to old elves, world-weary.” Ironic, it’s ironic that he’s saying that as a young elf explaining his own death. “Those who are tired of existence. But any elf who has experienced enough grief is at risk.”
Her face is nothing short of horrified. “You’re- fading? But doesn’t it usually happen to old elves? Wait, are you old?”
“I’m fifty-five.”
“Is that old?”
He has to laugh. “Fifty is the elven equivalent of eighteen for humans, the age of maturity.” Though he feels so much older than that, both in elven terms and in human.
“Oh.”
There’s a moment of silence, then, “How can you be so calm if you’re dying?”
“I’m tired, Katherine. The world tore me away from the people I loved, and..I’m tired of fighting it.” He’s so, so exhausted. So sick of having to claw and scrape and struggle for the barest scraps of happiness.
“Is there a way to reverse fading- to fix it?” Katherine sounds so hopeful that the question seems almost naive even though she’s far more capable of a ruler than he is. Naive in the affairs of elves, maybe, much as she’s intelligent in so many other ways.
Scott tries not to flinch at the innocent inquiry, thinking about the deaths from fading that he’s watched. “Technically, yes. If an elf recovers enough emotionally, it’s reversible. But whatever caused them to fade the first time can- and often does- cause it again.” And again, and again, until there’s nothing to be done but let them die , he finishes in his head.
Katherine nods, a look of determination overtaking the hope. “We’ll just have to reverse it, then.”
“That’s sweet, Katherine, but I’m dying.”
“No. You’re not going to die. Now come on, you can show me your empire while I fill you in on what’s happening on the rest of the continent.” She sounds so firm that he doesn’t dare disobey, though his exhaustion makes a fair effort at convincing him to. Will this really fix anything? Unlikely. But it’s worth it to try, if only to humor Katherine. At least this way she’ll have the comfort of having tried to save him when he inevitably fades away into nothing
Scott takes her hand, though it brings him little warmth, cold from her trek here. “Alright.” He swallows the bitter grief in his throat before it can seep into his words. “We can try.”
He leads Katherine around Rivendell, taking some pride in the way she oohs over the decor. If there’s one thing he can do right, it’s building. While some elven rulers might see it as below themselves to help build houses for their citizens, Scott finds building soothing. It’s one of the few skills he picked up during his time away that people really appreciate; no one wants to live in a shitty house.
As they walk, she also tells Scott about the demon, Xornoth. “The demon’s already visited a lot of people, I think. Gem and Shubble for sure, and Fwhip and Sausage. That’s not even mentioning the corruption that’s been spreading.”
If Scott said that the name Xornoth didn’t make him flinch, he would be lying to himself. It’s not your sibling , he tells himself. It’s just a coincidence .
It’s through the virtue of years of lying that his voice comes out steady. “There’s corruption in Rivendell too. Likely Xornoth’s work. And given that Jimmy still has Vilya-” his heart doesn’t ache when he says Jimmy’s name, it doesn’t- “well, I haven’t been able to do much.”
“Vilya?” Katherine asks.
“A ring of power. My inheritance from the Noldor.”
“Why does Jimmy have it?”
He doesn’t answer. He won’t- can’t talk about Jimmy, not without remembering how he looked with an arrow through his throat, bright smile gone and face frozen in fear. How does he explain how much Jimmy meant to him? How much he’s now giving up, knowing he’ll have to lose it one way or another?
Katherine drops the topic, seemingly sensing that she’s stumbled on something sensitive. When she has to go home, she leaves with a friendly goodbye and a promise to visit, and Scott believes neither. Who would put the effort into visiting him? He’s not a good friend, he’s not a good king, and god knows he’s not a good husband. In fact, he’s actively avoiding his husband. He may have kept the pufferfish Jimmy gave him, but that doesn’t mean anything. He can’t fall in love with Jimmy again. Loving Jimmy will kill him. (Scott ignores the small voice at the back of his head that whispers that he’s still in love with Jimmy and it’s already killing him just as he always knew it would.)
To his surprise, Katherine does come back next week, and the week after that. He’s ashamed to admit it, but there’s some part of him that’s pathetically grateful when she shows up at his doorstep. It’s a chance to not be alone . Much as he dreads the day when she finally gives up on him, it’s nice that someone cares enough to try and save him from himself.
The third week, Katherine doesn’t show up. Instead, the footsteps on the stairs are familiar in a way that makes Scott’s heart twist painfully.
He takes a deep breath. “Hello, Jimmy.”
“How’d you know it was me?” Jimmy asks. Scott can tell he’s startled by the way his voice goes up, almost frightened.
Scott steels himself, taking a deep breath before rolling over to face his ex-husband. “Do you think I could ever forget the sound of your footsteps?” He forces himself to not get distracted staring at Jimmy, instead going on before Jimmy can open his mouth. “What are you doing here?”
“Katherine asked me to visit, I’m not sure why, but...here I am. Say, why is she visiting every week?” Jimmy’s so curious. So naive, as always.
Scott laughs, bitter. “Katherine thinks she can save me.”
“Save you from what?”
Scott hears the concern in Jimmy’s words, and he can’t bring himself to break the news. It’s not as if it matters. It’s not as if Jimmy would care; he came here because of Katherine. Maybe he cared at the start of Empires, but Scott’s been nothing but rude to him since. There’s no reason for him to care. (He cares. Scott’s lying, like always. Jimmy cares and Scott knows it.)
“Save you from what?” Jimmy asks again, more insistently.
He refuses to say it. He needs Jimmy out, out of his room and out of his life before he does something he’ll regret. “You should go.” To prove his point, he tries to stand, finding himself too dizzy to quite pull it off. Jimmy rushes to catch him, and Scott hates himself just a little for how that still gives him a warm feeling.
“Scott, what is going on?”
He brushes Jimmy off, letting go of his arm and hurrying for the stairs. He can’t let Jimmy work his way into his heart again; Scott won’t be strong enough to let him go this time.
“Scott, seriously! Answer me, are you okay? What’s happening?” Jimmy sounds almost angry, but Scott can hear the distress under it and that’s what breaks him.
“I’m fading, alright?” His voice nearly breaks at the concern on Jimmy’s face when he whirls to face him. “I’m dying, now leave me alone!”
Jimmy sputters, seemingly caught off guard. “You- what- but elves don’t die, right?”
“We do. From poison, from swords-” Scott thinks back to third life- “from arrows through the throat, from grief.” The words come out more raw than he intends, leaving him scrambling to recover his composure. He takes a deep breath in and out, forcing his voice to steady again. “Come on. If you’re not going to leave, I might as well show you around.”
“You can’t just drop something like that on a man, you know!” Jimmy calls after him, although Scott can hear his footsteps following as well.
“You did ask, to be fair.” Scott replies. His voice is calm. He’s fine.
“I guess so, but- but still, dude.”
Scott pushes open the side door, holding it for Jimmy. “Here.”
Jimmy nods and slips through the door.  “Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Scott starts towards the bridges, intending to show Jimmy the enchanting tower and then the door. He doesn’t care about how fast he’s walking, Jimmy can keep up. He’s taller than Scott and probably has better balance at the moment too. Scott’s struggling not to fall, honestly, but his pride won’t let him go slower.
Jimmy breaks the awkward silence with the question Scott least wants to hear. “So, uh..are we going to talk about 3rd life?”
“No,” Scott says firmly.
“Why not? We need to talk about it some time-”
“I said no .” He can’t talk about it.
“It’s literally killing you to not talk about it!”
The words strike right at the raw wound of Jimmy’s death, and Scott freezes. Inhales. Exhales. Tries to keep calm.
“Tell me I’m wrong, Scott!” Jimmy cries. He sounds so upset, Scott’s heart aches. “I dare you, tell me I’m wrong! Tell me you never cared about me, tell me you didn’t bother to bury me, tell me it didn’t hurt even a little when I died! Tell me I was just stupid little Jimmy, a toy for an elf who’d live far beyond my lifespan! Tell me whatever, just tell me the truth! ”
Scott takes a deep breath. “Fine. You want to know what happened after you died?” He can’t think straight through the rage clouding his head, the desperate need to prove that Jimmy’s wrong , that Scott loved him so much it’s killing him. “You want to hear about me screaming until my throat went raw? You want to know that I kissed your face and sobbed and begged you to wake up, over and over until I couldn’t speak at all? You want to live with the knowledge that Grian had to physically pull me away from your body? Is that what you want to hear, Jimmy? ” His voice damn near breaks on his husband’s name, and Scott thanks the gods he stopped believing in a long time ago that it doesn’t.
“No,” Jimmy says. His voice is soft, gentle, almost as if Scott is a wounded animal that needs a delicate touch. “That’s not what I want to hear, not at all. I’d rather you be happy than love me.”
The words punch the air from Scott’s lungs, raw and soft and real. Scott is an excellent liar. Jimmy isn’t. Scott knows that Jimmy is telling the truth. What he doesn’t know is how to handle that level of devotion. He wonders again how Jimmy- sweet, genuine Jimmy who wears his heart on his sleeve and is hopelessly devoted to an elf who can’t be fully his- chose Scott of all people. Scott, who’s as bitter as Jimmy is sweet, who’s sarcastic and snarky and hasn’t been good enough for just about anything in his life. He certainly wasn’t good enough to save Jimmy, Scott thinks bitterly.
He shakes off the thought. “I buried you on the hill above our houses. I planted a poppy over your grave.”
“Oh.”
“Grian came over the next day. I didn’t want to see anyone who wasn’t you, but I let him in because I had to. He helped me do the straps on my armor and asked me if he could do anything else to make things easier. I told him to bury me next to you.”
“Did he?”
Scott almost laughs at the innocent question. “How would I know? Grian was honorable enough, though, loyal to his allies. I like to think he did.”
“He was a good guy,” Jimmy agrees. “A little bit bloodthirsty, I guess, but good. I don’t suppose he survived any better than the rest of us, though maybe being bloodthirsty helped.”
“Maybe.”
“Can I- can I ask you why you hate me so much now?” Jimmy’s tone is uncertain, hesitant and it hurts . “I mean, if you mourned me in third life and all.”
Scott looks away from his earnest gaze, but he can’t stop the truth slipping out. “I don’t hate you.”
“You don’t?” Jimmy asks, seemingly bewildered. “But you burned the pufferfish-”
“I didn’t. I kept it.” Scott doesn’t want to think about this, wants to say it even less. “I never hated you. I don’t think I’m capable of it.”
“Then why do you keep avoiding me?”
“I’ve been kind of busy dying,” Scott says wryly, unable to resist a bit of morbid humor at his own expense.
“Scott! That’s not funny!”
“It was a little funny.”
“No!”
Jimmy sounds genuinely distressed, and Scott drops the wry smile. “Jimmy, I’m an elf. I won’t live far beyond you, but only because I’ll fade without you.” It’s a simple statement. The truth, as much as he can give.
“So your solution is to isolate yourself and fade now?” Jimmy’s outrage is justifiable, but Scott just shrugs.
“It does sound stupid when you put it like that, doesn’t it?” It really does. “But I lost you once, and I don’t think I could bear it again.”
A hand lands on Scott’s arm, and he turns, startled. Jimmy doesn’t give him time to react, throwing his arms around Scott and pulling him close. Scott almost lets out a very undignified squeak at the sudden contact, though he slowly relaxes into Jimmy’s hold.
He should pull away. He shouldn’t give Jimmy false hope like this. But Jimmy is so warm , and Scott is so unbearably cold. Every fiber of his being is screaming that this is what’s right; screw Rivendell and obligations and too-heavy crowns, Jimmy is home to him. He’s warm for the first time in months, and the most heartbreaking part is that it can’t last. He can’t do this again.
He pulls away, ignoring the painful hope on Jimmy’s face. “I’m sorry, Jimmy.” For the first time all conversation, his voice well and truly wobbles. “I can’t. Not again.”
“But-”
Scott shakes his head. “Losing you will destroy me. We dared to love, and now all we can do now is lessen the pain when it all comes crashing down.” The words are like glass in his throat, but he forces them out anyways. They have to be said.
Jimmy’s silent, and it hurts more than if Jimmy had yelled at him.
“Goodbye, Jimmy,” Scott manages, turning away before Jimmy can see the way his face twists in pain. He makes his retreat as quickly as possible, stumbling and nearly taking a tumble just before he reaches the door. Unlike before, there’s no helpful ex-husband there to catch him, to make sure he’s alright and ask a million questions until Scott’s forced to admit that he’s not okay and hasn’t been in a long time.
He fumbles with the latch, hands shaking and vision blurring. Finally, it clicks, and Scott stumbles inside and slams the door shut before sliding to the ground. He won’t cry. He won’t . He doesn’t love Jimmy, he can’t love Jimmy anymore. Jimmy was never meant to be his. They might have carved out a few precious moments, stolen them from the universe and giggled like kids with their hands in the cookie jar as they kissed amongst the flowers, but those brief moments were all they were ever going to be allowed. It was always going to end this way, Scott tells himself. There’s no use crying over a mortal who will be dead in the blink of an eye to an elf. What would his parents say? That this was typical of him, probably. Typical Scott, always wanting what he would never be able to have. Typical, predictable Scott, loving a mortal who shouldn’t be worth anything to him.
He’s crying. There are tears spotting his cyan robes, splashing onto the wood floors he worked so hard on. Scott rubs at his eyes furiously, but that only makes it worse, sobs shuddering through him and leaving him hollow and aching. He’s so cold . The ache in his chest has returned tenfold, stealing away his breath, and he curls further into himself, struggling for air.
He’s going to die. He is going to die , alone on the floor of his house because he fell for someone he couldn’t have. For all that he’s spent every minute since Jimmy’s death in 3rd life wishing for some way out of this cruel world, he’s terrified now that it seems inevitable. He’s scared in a way he hasn’t been in forever, breath coming quick and shallow. He's scared, and he is so, so tired of this ache that haunts him, the chill that he can never get rid of.
“Jimmy,” Scott whispers. There’s no way for the human to hear him, but the name brings him some comfort. “ Jimmy .” He wants his husband. He wants someone to hug him. He doesn’t want to fade away freezing and alone, no one there to hold his hand or reassure him that the pain will be over soon. Internally, he begs for someone, anyone who cares to come looking. To find him, even if they’re too late to save him. Someone. Anyone. Please.
No one comes, and Scott lays on his floor until his breathing steadies out again. His head spins when he forces himself to his feet, and he has to lean against the wall for a few moments. There’s no time for dramatics, he tells himself sternly. He has a kingdom to rule. He cannot afford to break over a mortal he never should have fallen for in the first place. He doesn’t love Jimmy anymore, he can’t .
(He’s lying. But Scott has always been an excellent liar, even when it’s to himself.)
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kelyon · 3 years
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Golden Rings 23: A Hat
The Storybrooke sequel to Golden Cuffs
Jefferson tries to get help
Read on AO3
Inside a cramped little cottage in a cramped little town in the mountains of a flat planet that flies through space on the back of four elephants on top of a turtle, he is having dinner with his family. 
Technically, they are Leo’s family, but technicalities have never troubled him. These people have welcomed him into their lives. This smoke-filled, boisterous cottage is more home to him than the solemn rock quarry where Jefferson spent the first few miserable decades of his life. 
The meal is mostly over, but everyone lingers over pudding and conversation and beer. A few of his sisters-in-law have gathered up the dishes and are headed back to the kitchen for the washing up.
His daughter sits on his lap. She is almost too big for the gesture and maybe that’s why she wants it so much. It’s certainly why he lets her do it. How much longer will he have with his little girl? Even if they have escaped from the Queen’s curse, they cannot escape time. There will only be a few more years before Grace is more a woman than a baby. She’ll be as pretty as her mother, and just as smart, winding her way through the hearts of everyone who meets her.
But for now, his girl sits on his lap and listens to her family. Beside him, Leo squeezes his arm. 
She leans into him. “No matter where we go, it’s never better than being home.”   
He smiles at her, his wife, his life. Her face is ruddy from drink and smoke. Her blonde hair curls in the heat, teasing wisps escape from her bun. Her plump curves fill out her dress like bursting sausage. She has a shine of bacon grease around her mouth and a touch of beer foam on the tip of her nose. In all the lands in all the worlds, he has never seen anyone more beautiful. 
Somewhere down the table, a baby cries. One of his many sisters-in-law is trying to soothe one of Grace’s many cousins, without much success. The infant has been fussing all night, and now the poor thing’s wails have drowned out the riotous conversation.
“‘Ere now!” Leona’s mother calls down from the head of the table. “Are you going to help that poor babby or do I ‘ave to?”
His sister-in-law--a washed out, nervous looking woman whose name no one can remember--looks gratefully up at Nanny Ogg. “Can you?”
Nanny Ogg snorts. This grande dame--which she translates as “big woman”--is the matriarch of the Ogg clan and the second-most powerful witch in the Ramptops Mountains, though she doesn’t try as hard. She’s had five husbands (and married three of them), fifteen children, and more grandchildren and great-grandchildren than anyone in Lancre can count. 
The baby is passed from hand to hand down the table, squalling all the way. When it finally gets to the head of the table, it is placed into the very solid arms of a round old woman dressed in black. She has a pipe, a pint, and a black pointy hat. (There’s nothing magic about a pointy hat, except that it says that the person underneath it is a witch.) She also has lively dark eyes--like Leo’s, like Grace’s--and the widest grin most people have ever seen.
The current occupant of the old woman’s lap is a mangy ball of fur and claws named Greebo. Though known to pick fights with bears (and not lose), he’s nothing but an old softy to Nanny Ogg. Still, the cat is smart enough to know that he is always second place to any child. As soon as the baby is in the witch’s arms, he scampers out of the way.
Jefferson’s life would have been hell if Nanny Ogg hadn’t given him her approval to marry Leo. They would have married anyway--Leo wouldn’t have let anything stop them--but coming home like this would have been… difficult. There are a dozen tiny ways an Ogg can tell you they don’t like you--and a hundred large and painful ones. But Nanny Ogg’s welcoming nature--and Jefferson’s endless potential to bring her presents from far-off lands--had ensured that they were welcome any time. 
Within a minute of entering Nanny Ogg’s embrace, the screaming baby quiets. Within another minute, it sleeps peacefully, despite the raucous conversation around the table. 
Perched on his knees, Grace looks curious. “Was that magic, Gran?”
“Coo-ee, no, my duck!” Nanny Ogg chuckles. “The day I needs magic to calm a babe is the day you lot can put me in the ground!”
“But you did it so fast!” Grace persists. 
“Coz I been doing it so long,” Nanny Ogg explains. “Ever since your Uncle Jason was a wee thing! There’s a knack to it, but it ain’t magic.”
Grace ponders this for a moment. Children are allowed to speak freely around Nanny Ogg’s table--provided they keep the conversation interesting. “Papa knows a man who does magic.”
Jefferson thinks about explaining, but clearly this is a private conversation.
Nanny Ogg nods sagely. “I imagine your dad knows all kinds of people, the work he does.”
“He was a funny little man,” Grace says. “He has a funny voice and he’s all green.”
“Takes all sorts, luv. We can’t help the way we’re made.”
“He gave me a yellow dress, to match Mama’s pink one. He pulled it out of the air! We were there for--why were we there, Papa?”
“A wedding,” Jefferson answers. “The Dark One and Belle wanted us to be there for their wedding.”
“It was a lovely day,” Leo smiles at him while stroking their daughter’s hair. “Do you remember dancing in that big ballroom, Grace? Remember how he made the instruments play themselves?”
Nanny Ogg snorts. “Sounds like a show-off, if you ask me.”
“Oh he is,” Jefferson agrees. “I don’t know if you’d like him, and Mistress Weatherwax would hate him.”
“Well, there’s not many I don’t like, and there’s not many Esme Weatherwax don’t hate, at least at first.” 
They laugh at that, as they laugh at everything. The conversation moves on to other topics. Later the lot of them move away from the table and into the parlor. Around a fire and more beer, Nanny Ogg brings out her banjo, but the evening still manages to end happily. 
He puts Grace to bed in a room with her cousins, a group of girls near her age. He kisses her and makes sure she has her stuffed rabbit. Then he goes up to the bedroom where Leo is waiting.
His wife is a dream, all satiny pink. All soft and warm and round. Like a sunset cloud with grasping arms. Like candy floss with a libido. She is everything. All the happiness he has now is because of her. This family, this life, their daughter. Everything in his past led to her, everything in the present comes from her, everything in the future will be theirs together. 
They make love, full of food and clumsy with drink. Their lips are loose and sloppy. They giggle and try to stay quiet in this crowded house. Their hands know their bodies. They know how to pleasure each other. They know. They feel. They love. They delight in each other and fall asleep in each other’s arms.
When Jefferson wakes up, everything is gone. 
****
For the ten thousand, three hundred ninetieth time, Jefferson woke up alone. In a giant, empty bed, inside a giant, empty house. He woke up, like he always did, with a gnawing ache in his chest and a burning desire for nothing more than to go back to sleep. Back to his dream. His best dreams were always about them. Leo. Grace. Home.
Sitting up in bed, Jefferson covered his face with his hands and let a dry sob rack through him. Tears would come later. First sob of the morning was always dry.
“Morning” was not the right word. It was a gray spring afternoon, more or less identical to every other gray afternoon he’d woken up in since he was brought over to this world. Over the years--over so many years--he had gotten in the habit of starting his day when most people in Storybrooke began to end theirs. The only reason he woke up at all was to get a chance to see his daughter walk home from school. 
The telescope was in the office, what he tended to think of as the hat room. This side of the massive house faced Main Street. He could see quite a lot--the diner, the Sheriff’s Station, a few important houses. And he had learned quite a lot, just by looking at all these people living their lives. 
Nothing changed in Storybrooke. Children didn’t get older. The old and sick never died. People worked the same jobs no matter how much they hated them. There was a girl he saw walking to and from the diner who had been nine months pregnant for twenty-eight years. Everyone was miserable, alone and unloved in one way or another, but they all carried on with what they thought were their lives. 
Until the day a yellow bug drove into town. 
Looking through the telescope, Jefferson trained his eyes on a lime green winter coat. The coat was bouncing over the shoulders of a young girl as she hopped, skipped and jumped her way around the sidewalk. His throat tightened, as it did every time he saw her. In the lens of the telescope, she looked close enough to reach out and touch. 
Grace was walking with another girl--Jefferson didn’t know her name. She was poor, from Old Town. Her father was gone and her mother worked long hours for low pay. Girls like that didn’t get their accomplishments written up about in the newspaper the way Grace did every time she won the Science Fair. Until a few months ago, Grace had never spoken to this girl. Both of them had walked the same path from the school to the abandoned library, twenty feet apart, every day for twenty-eight years, without ever interacting with each other.
Until the day Sheriff Swan started a youth outreach campaign, and made a point to talk about how much safer kids were if they used the buddy system when they didn’t have an adult around.
Then Grace had looked up from her routine, and she had seen the other girl looking back. Both of them needed someone to walk with. Both of them were looking for a friend. Both of them found one. It was a little thing, but it was a change.
He watched them walk from the library to the house in New Town where Tim and Mia Lewis lived. The people Grace thought were her parents. Every once in a while, they ran an ad in the Storybrooke Daily Mirror--all three of them with big smiles, the adults offering their services in insurance and real estate. 
The lights were off inside the house, so he couldn’t see into the kitchen. He couldn’t see what healthy snacks Mia had made for the girls today. He couldn’t see what game they played to unwind for a bit before Mia made sure they both started their homework. A few hours later, the other girl’s mother would stop by after her shift at Granny’s. He never knew if she thanked Mia for watching her daughter. Maybe it was just understood. Maybe Mia said she was just doing what Sheriff Swan advised, watching out for children who might otherwise get into trouble, being alone and unsupervised.
Once Grace was out of his sight, Jefferson moved the telescope to look around town. Not too many changes today. Archie Hopper was walking his dalmatian. Marco the handyman was making another trip to the hardware store. The stranger on the motorcycle idled outside Marine Automotive; he seemed to be watching Marco. Mrs. Gold was strutting away from the pawn shop with her head held high.
 He watched her, this woman who used to be Belle. It looked like she was going towards City Hall. Curious. Was she applying for a permit? Was there some licence she needed to renew? His fingers itched to pick up the phone and call the Dark One about what he had seen. He was the only other human being in town, the only person who knew the truth about anything. It was just the Dark One, Jefferson, and Queen Regina. 
But he couldn’t bother him too much. They couldn’t raise any more suspicion than they already had with their one secret meeting in the woods. The Dark One was still trying to maintain his cover as “Mr. Gold.” Besides, what difference could it make that Belle was running an errand to City Hall?
With a sigh, Jefferson moved away from the telescope. He’d been awake for more than an hour, it was time to put on pants. 
In no time at all, he had showered, dressed, and chugged down a protein shake. Most days, it was hard for him to summon up the will to cook or eat. He kept his body going with prepackaged meal replacements. They tasted like crap, but at least he didn’t have to think about them. He left cooking for people who thought they had something to live for. 
He made his way to the front doors. The house had a wide driveway that ran under a large overhang. Whenever visitors came, they could disembark from the vehicles and go into the house without the hazards of rain or snow. 
If he ever had visitors.
At the moment, and for the past twenty-eight years, all he had was the most recent copy of the Storybrooke Daily Mirror. It wasn’t a bastion of hard-hitting journalism, but for a long time it had been the only way he could know anything about the town he spent so much time looking at. The newspaper had given him names to put to the faces--Mayor Mills, Mr. Gold, Sheriff Humbert, and later Sheriff Swan. It had been a lifeline, and he still clung to it. For nearly three decades, the dates on the front page had been the only changes he had seen anywhere in this town. 
Today’s date was April 2nd, 2012. The headline was about the continued search for a missing person. Kathryn Nolan, a paralegal working at the firm of Duke & Duke, had been missing for more than a month. There had been sightings of a woman matching her description in various parts of Storybrooke, but by the time the police arrived, all traces of her had gone. Sheriff Swan encouraged anyone with any information regarding Mrs. Nolan’s whereabouts to call the station.
On the next page, there was an editorial decrying the lack of effort put forth by Kathryn’s husband, David Nolan, to aid in the search. Sydney Glass stopped just short of outright accusing Mr. Nolan of gross negligence or foul play. He only noted the amount of time Mr. Nolan spent with the schoolteacher, Miss Blanchard. The article concluded with speculation that perhaps Mrs. Nolan was not missing at all, but had run away from a terminally unhappy home.      
After finishing the paper, he put it away in the office closet and went back to the telescope. The lights were on in the house where Grace lived. The other girl had been picked up. Tim Lewis was home from work. The three of them were making dinner together. Mia was stirring a pot of chili and Tim was taking a bag of corn out of the freezer.
“She doesn’t like corn, guys,” Jefferson muttered to himself. “She won’t eat the chili if you put corn in it. You’ve been taking care of her for twenty-eight years and you’ve never figured that out.”
He shook his head and looked away. Sometimes it was maddening to watch the town like this, to see these people make the same mistakes, over and over. Emma Swan had made some changes, but there were still so many ways to be unhappy.
He watched dinner in the Lewis household. He watched Grace carefully pick out all the corn from her bowl of chili and set it into her paper napkin. He watched Mia shake her head at his daughter. He watched Tim lecture her about wasting food. He watched Grace scowl as she picked up the napkin and dumped the offending corn kernels back into the chili. She ate, but she looked like she was going to vomit.
“I’m sorry, love,” he whispered. He had to get to her, somehow. He had to let her know that he was her father. He had to get her back to Leo.
After dinner, the family watched TV. Grace sat on a couch between Tim and Mia, and flickering light bathed over all of them. They weren’t bad people, her fake-parents. They did love her, and they did the best they could to raise her to be healthy and successful in this world. Whoever Tim and Mia had been before, they were victims of the curse too. They had never meant to steal another couple’s daughter. 
He had to put this right. He had to end this curse. Jefferson didn’t have much power, but he would do anything to put his family back together. 
He moved the telescope away from Grace. After a brief search, he found the big pink house in Old Town where the Dark One lived. The lights were on, but no one was visible through the windows. If he called on the phone, the Dark One would tell him to be patient. The Savior would break the curse in due time. 
But Jefferson had already waited too long. 
Scanning through town, he set his sights on the Sheriff’s station. Storybrooke was peaceful enough that most of the cops could hang up their guns in time for dinner. They were all long gone by now. Even Sheriff Swan was packing up and getting ready to go home for the night. 
Perfect. 
Picking up the sleek, silver cordless phone, Jefferson punched in the numbers he had seen in the newspaper. Through the telescope, he could see Emma Swan hear the phone ringing. She slumped and grimaced in the way of everyone being clawed back into a job they thought was done for the day. Then she straightened up, and picked up the receiver on her desk.
“Sheriff’s station, this is Emma.”
Jefferson cleared his throat. “Yeah, is this the number to call if somebody saw Kathryn Nolan?”
Perking up, Emma fumbled on her desk for a pen and paper. “It sure is. Who am I talking to?”
That question was too complicated to get into. “Yeah, I don’t know for sure if it was Kathryn Nolan, but it looked like a woman in her mid-thirties, caucasian, looked kinda haggard. I, uh, I tried to talk to her, but she just kept walking through the woods.”
“Which woods are those? Where was this?”
“Oh, yeah, it was the north woods. You ever been up on Angus Drive?”
“Can’t say that I have. Still kind of new to the area.”
“Yeah, well that’s where she was. About ten minutes ago I saw her, she was walking towards town. Like I said, I tried to get her attention, but she didn’t listen. I didn’t wanna try to chase after her. Might scare her, you know. Make things worse.”
“Right, right,” Emma said. “So, north woods, Angus Drive, ten minutes ago. And what was your name?”
Jefferson hung up the phone. Then he got his coat and a scarf. It was time to go for a walk.  
****
There were several cars in the massive garage of the house where Jefferson had been a prisoner. For the first twenty-eight years, he hadn’t been able to open the garage door to get them on the road. Even after Emma had rolled in, the cars were still useless. None of them had gasoline.
So Jefferson walked. He had walked along the highway and through the woods and over the town line as far as he could before something terrible happened. He walked into town sometimes, trying to find a way out. When he’d noticed “Mr. Gold” acting strangely, he had walked to the pawn shop.
At this point, he knew the town better than anyone else. Who knows the shape of a cage better than the captive inside? He knew the borders and boundaries, especially the area around the house. He knew where the road made a wicked hairpin turn, where someone who was still kind of new to the area wouldn’t know what was coming and could be caught off guard. 
The yellow Volkswagen had better brakes than he thought--Emma stopped short of actually hitting him when he emerged from the woods onto the road in front of her. He’d been willing to take the hit, half-curious to see if the curse would let any injury last longer than a week or so. 
Emma’s quick driving stopped him from actually getting hurt, but the collision was close enough that he could fall to the ground in a convincing show. She stopped the car and got out when she saw him. 
“Oh my God, are you okay?”
On the gravel shoulder of the highway, Jefferson groaned and clutched his leg.
“Sir? Sir, can you talk? I’m Emma Swan, do I need to call for EMTs?”
“No,” Jefferson gritted his teeth, swallowed the imaginary pain. “No, I live around here. I’ll be fine. Can you just get me back to my house?”
For just a moment, she hesitated. “Uh, sure. Yeah, let’s get you inside, at least.”
She helped him up and into the passenger seat of the bug. Then she began to drive.
“So where do you live, Mr…?”
“Angus Drive.” He answered only the question she had said out loud. “It’s up ahead.”
 “Funny.” Now that the moment of panic had passed, Emma seemed less willing to accept half-answers. “I just got a call about that address. A man said he saw a missing person out this way. Maybe you saw her when you were out. A blonde woman in her mid-thirties?”
He shook his head. “That sounds like your description, Sheriff.”
“First, I’m not in my mid-thirties. Second, how did you know I’m the Sheriff?”
“I read the paper. And who else would be getting a call about a missing person? And, you’ve got your badge on your hip.”
She frowned. “Guess that all checks out. Yeah, I’m Sheriff Swan. What’s your name?”
Again, Jefferson didn’t answer. “This is the house on the right.”
“A house?” Emma said as she parked under the awning. “This looks more like a hotel! Do you have a big family or something?”
Jefferson opened the door, but made sure to wait for her to help him out of the car. “No,” he said. “It’s just me.”
“The sign on the mailbox says Dogdson.” 
“Sure does.”
Leaning on Emma, Jefferson pretended to hobble up the stairs to get into the front door. The curse had never given him a key to this house, so he always left it unlocked. Someday,  when the curse was broken, he would find a way to lock the door behind him and walk away a free man. He would take Grace and walk all the way to the Discworld if he had to.
“Where should I put you?” Emma asked once they were in the foyer.
“Closest living room is over there.”
She set him up on one of the white leather couches with his “bad” leg propped up on the arm. “Want me to take a look at it?”
“No, no, I’ll be fine. Listen, I’m kind of an amateur cartographer. Upstairs, I’ve got maps for all of these woods. They could be useful to you, since you don’t know the area well.”
Hands on her hips, Emma Swan looked down at him. She looked shrewd, suspicious. Kind of like Leo, only skinny. “I never told you I don’t know the area.”
Jefferson grinned. What was the old saying about honesty? Better to tell the truth because then you don’t have to keep track of your lies? “I guess you didn’t.”  
“The only person I told that to lately was a man on the phone who also didn’t tell me his name.” Emma sat down on the coffee table in front of the couch so they were on the same level. “Did you actually see Kathryn Nolan around here?”
He didn’t stop grinning. “No.”
“And your leg isn’t hurt at all.”
It wasn’t a question, but he still answered. “No.”
“Can you give me a single good reason why I shouldn’t arrest you on the very serious charge of Wasting the Sheriff’s Time?”
Jefferson sat up. “I do need your help,” he said. “But I thought if I told you what was going on, you would think I was crazy.”
Emma didn’t blink at that. “People who might be crazy need just as much help as people who might be sane. Let’s start from the beginning: Tell me your name.”
“Jefferson,” he answered immediately.
“Jefferson,” she repeated. “Is that a first name or a last name?”
“First.”
“And the last name?”
He didn’t really have one. Few people in the old world did. “Ogg,” he answered. 
It was the name he went by on worlds where last names were common. Leo’s name. He was part of a proud tradition of men becoming Mr. Ogg when they married an Ogg woman. 
Emma looked him in the eyes, long and hard. “Jefferson Ogg,” she said slowly. “That’s… such a weird name, I don’t think you made it up.”
“I didn’t,” he said. 
“Uh-huh,” she said. “And what do you need help with, Jefferson Ogg?”
“I…” Gods, how could he even start? He would just have to show her. “It’s upstairs.”
She gave him another look, not speaking. Then she pulled a cell phone out of her pocket and pressed some buttons. 
“Texting on the job?”
“I left my walkie-talkie in the car.” She put her phone away. “Just letting my roommate know where I am and to call the dispatch office if she doesn’t hear from me in 10 minutes.”
That was almost funny, that she thought he was dangerous. As if the most dangerous person in Storybrooke wasn’t signing Sheriff Swan’s paychecks. 
“Let’s go upstairs,” he said.
****
It was the first time anyone other than him had set foot in the office. He wondered what Emma made of the room. All Jefferson ever cared about was the telescope and the walk-in closet where he stored the newspapers. Neither of those things drew Emma’s focus.
“That’s a lot of top hats,” she said as she stood in front of the lit-up shelf. There were rows of them, all made of an endless supply of black felt. “You part of a show choir or something?”
“No.” He shut the door behind them, locked it. “The hats… are actually what I need your help with.” He pulled out some of the felt, some sewing needles and a pair of scissors. He tossed them all onto the table in front of her. “I need you to make one.”
Now the expression on Emma’s face was what ‘suspicious’ wanted to be when it grew up. “You think I’m a hatter?”
He stood behind her, nudging her into a chair in front of the raw materials. “I think you can do extraordinary things, Emma. I think you can do exactly what I need you to. I think you can save me.”
Her expression morphed from disbelief to exhaustion. “No, not you too. Have you been talking to Henry? What is it with this town and people thinking I can save them?”
“Because you can!” He put his hands on either side of the chair and pushed her to the table. Then he leaned over her to keep her from getting up. “You are a special person, Emma. You made the changes start, you can make everything good again.”
“Bring back the happy endings, is that what you want from me?”
She was angry. She meant the remark to be flippant. But she was so right it brought tears to his eyes. 
“Yes,” Jefferson whispered. “Yes, that’s all I want. The Dark One says it’s your destiny, that you have already brought--”
“Wait, who?”
“The Dark One,” he said. “Rumpelstiltskin, he--”
“Will you listen to yourself?” Emma pushed herself up away from the table and stood up to confront him. “Do you think you’ve had a conversation with Rumpelstiltskin? What, do you think Regina is the Evil Queen too?”
“Yes!” he shouted. He picked the felt up off the table and shook the fabric in her face. “You have all the pieces, Emma! Why can’t you put them together?”
“Because this is the real world!” she shouted back. 
“Every world is real!” 
She made for the door. The lock kept her busy for just enough time that Jefferson was able to catch up with her. Gently, he pulled her away from the door and stood in front of it. Just being taller than her was enough to make him look like a threat.
“You don’t understand,” he tried to keep his voice from breaking. “There are so many worlds out there. I’ve been to most of them. The Dark One gave me a hat that I can use to travel from world to world. I could use it to get out of here, but I don’t have it anymore!”
Emma reached for her phone. He grabbed her wrist and pulled the device out of her hand.
“It needs magic,” he explained, as calmly as he could. “I’ve made a hundred hats, but they’re just hats, no good to anyone. I need magic. You have magic. You brought magic to Storybrooke the day you came here.”
She frowned at the phone in his hand and stepped back. “There was nothing different about the day I came here.”
“You’re right.” Keeping her in his sights, he stepped away from the office door and toward the closet. “It was the day after you arrived, the day after you broke the sign. October 24th, 2011. That was the day the clock on the library started to tick.”
Emma just gaped at him. “How could you remember that?”
“It was the most important day in the history of this town. The first real day to happen in twenty-eight years.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Can I show you?” he asked. “I’ll even give you your phone back, so you can tell Mary Margaret you’re okay. But I just need you to promise that you’ll hear me out.”
She glared and held out her hand. “You are damn lucky you don’t have a gun right now.”
He watched her press the buttons, then put her phone back in her pocket. 
“You bought yourself another ten minutes because I don’t feel like filling out the paperwork necessary to arrest you.”
Jefferson went to the closet. “It’s in here,” he said. “All the evidence I have is in here.”
She put her hands on her hips, squared her shoulders. “Go get it then.” 
Right, Sheriff Swan wasn’t going to be the first one to go through an unknown door in the house of an obvious lunatic. Jefferson opened it, and showed her the newspapers. Twenty-eight stacks and counting. Each stack was made of twelve bundles, reaching to the ceiling. Three hundred and forty one bundles. The whole of the curse, contained in this room.
“I saved them all,” he said. “Twenty-eight years’ worth.”
“So you’ve been saving newspapers since you were, what, five?” 
“Since the day I came to this town,” he answered. “Since the day anyone came to this town.” Kneeling on the ground, he moved the smallest pile and pulled out the smallest bundle. “Do you want to know what day that was, Emma?”
She didn’t answer, but he took the paper out from the bottom of the bundle and held it up in front of her. 
“Go on,” he growled. “Read it.”
“Uh, it says that Mayor Mills announced a new committee to--”
“Read the date!” he snapped. 
Jaw clenched, Emma yanked the paper out of his hands and looked at the top. She didn’t read it out loud, but he saw her eyebrows furrow. 
“That’s… my birthday,” she whispered. “Like, that was the day I was born.”
“October 23rd, 1983,” he said. “That was the day the curse started. The day you were born was the day the Evil Queen cursed us all to live in a world without magic.”
“That’s--”
“There was no time.” He didn’t let her speak. “Nothing changed, nothing happened. We were frozen. Most of them didn’t notice, but I did. I remembered, I…” He couldn’t go on. “I thought I was crazy. I thought nothing I knew was real. I thought I had lost everything. But you… You’re the Savior. You can bring it back.”
Emma shook her head and looked down at the newspaper again. “Even if all this is true, why am I the one who has to--wait a minute!” She pointed at the paper, at a picture of the mayor. “This is a crock of shit! That’s Regina! Regina wasn’t mayor on the day I was born!” She flipped through the other pages. “Yeah, look at this. Sydney looks the same in this picture as he does today. Look at the school news, I’ve seen these kids!”
“I told you, time was frozen.”
“Or you put a fake date on an old paper just to mess with me!” She kept looking at the newspaper, seeing but not understanding. “Yeah, this ad here, this is Tim Lewis. He gave me a discount on my car insurance. His daughter, Paige? She looks exactly like she does in this ad. Pretty sure she’s eleven, not thirty-nine.”
Jefferson ripped the paper out of Emma’s hands. “She is not his daughter!” He snarled. “Will you listen to me? That girl’s name is Grace. She is eleven. She has been eleven for twenty-eight years!”
“I--” Emma put her hands up and let out a slow breath. “I don’t think either one of us is going to convince the other.”
“I don’t care if you believe me, I just need you to make a gods-damned hat!”
To Jefferson’s shock, Emma seemed ready to do what he asked, maybe in the name of de-escalating the situation. She went back to the table, slowly sat down, and picked up the felt. “You need this so you can go back to Fairytale Land?”
He shook his head. “No, I don’t care about that world anymore. I need to go back to the Discworld.”
Emma squinted as she tried to thread a needle. “Discworld? I’ve heard of those books. They’re supposed to be funny, right?”
Jefferson didn’t smile. “It’s a real place.”
Looking up, Emma opened her mouth, and then closed it. “Sure.” She began to half-heartedly jam the needle between two pieces of felt. 
He collapsed into a chair by the telescope. Gods, was she really doing this? Jefferson only knew enough about magic to know that he was better off not playing with it. But if the Dark One was right, then Emma Swan wouldn’t be able to stop herself from using magic. She would do it naturally, maybe accidentally. It wouldn’t matter if the hat looked awful. All it had to do was work.
“My wife is from there,” he offered as a way to make conversation. 
Emma didn’t look up from the stitches. “From Discworld? Does that make her a witch or something?”
He shook his head. “Her mother is. I guess she could be too, if she wanted. Most of the time witchcraft is just knowing something other people don’t know.”
“Like how to make a hat?” Emma looked at him through a tube of felt. “It’s been a long time since my last Home Ec class. This is not going to be pretty.”
“It just needs to work,” he muttered. “Just… get it to work.”
Sighing, Emma pulled out her phone again.
“Has she even answered you?” he asked. “Maybe she’s off somewhere screwing David Nolan.”
A glare. “I’m doing you a favor by working on this hat. So maybe you could do me a favor and not say rude things about my friends.”
“I got you here by talking about Kathryn Nolan. Do you actually care about her?”
Emma kept her eyes on her work. “She’s a person. I care about people. She could be lost in the woods, disoriented and hungry. Of course I want to find her.”
“Do you think she’s still alive?”
“I have to hope so.” She cut one of the threads. “We haven’t found a body, or even body parts. If some monster was out there cutting out hearts and putting them in jewelry boxes, at least then there’d be some evidence.” She gave him a sideways glance. “Do you care about Kathryn Nolan? Or do you think she’s just a fairytale character?”
“I care about her because she’s a fairytale character,” Jefferson said. “Her name was Princess Abigail. She was the daughter of King Midas. She gave me a lot of gold just for trying to find a way to reverse the effects of her father’s… gift.”
Emma nodded, clearly humoring him. “I’d heard that King Midas had a daughter. I didn’t know her name was Abigail. Doesn’t sound Greek, but what do I know?” She was sewing the brim on the hat, after that it would be finished. 
Jefferson stood up. His feet moved on a schedule that was bigger than Emma Swan. He looked through the telescope. It was nine-thirty. Bedtime.
“Do you want to see her?” he whispered to Emma.
“Kathryn?”
“My daughter.”
They were putting her to bed, Tim and Mia both. She was almost too big for the gesture, but maybe that was why she wanted it so much. Jefferson felt Emma’s presence beside him, and he stepped away from the telescope. 
“They never remember to give her the stuffed rabbit,” he said. “That’s the only one that keeps her from having nightmares.”
“Oh, that’s Paige,” Emma said. She looked up from the window. “You… have a telescope pointed at the bedroom of an eleven year old girl.”
“She’s my daughter,” Jefferson repeated. “I’ve lost her mother. Grace doesn’t know who I am. I need to keep an eye on her.”
Emma stayed between Jefferson and the telescope. “Is it because Paige is adopted? Are you her birth father or something?”
He didn’t know whether to scream or cry, so he laughed. Emma kept talking.
“It’s no shame if that’s the case. Believe me, I know how mixed-up it can be to have a kid that’s yours but isn’t yours.”
“Shut up,” Jefferson said through gritted teeth. “Grace is mine. Mine and my wife’s.”
“You said you lost your wife…”
“Yes! And I’ll only find her again once I have a hat that works!” He almost grabbed her by the shoulders, but she was too fast. She made it back to the table and kept it as a barrier between them.
“Enough!” Emma said. She picked up the hat and tossed it over to him. “This is the last of my goodwill, understand? I’m going to leave now. You’re gonna let me out of this room and out of this house. I’m gonna call Tim and tell him to buy his daughter some blackout curtains. If I ever catch wind of you snooping around little girls again, I will personally make sure you rot in jail.”
Jefferson looked down at the crumpled felt in his hands. It was only a hat by the most generous definition. But maybe it would be enough.
When he looked up, Emma was gone. From outside, he heard the rumble of a car engine starting up. As she drove away, the sound grew fainter. He still held the hat in his hands. 
It didn’t feel magical. His old hat had a certain… quality. There was an aura about it, not quite tangible. But there was a feeling he got when he looked at his hat. A feeling of… possibility. Like there was so much more to it than what met the eye. There was none of that in the hat Emma had made. 
Maybe magic was different here. Maybe there was a way. Some way. He had to try. He would never know if he didn’t try. 
He closed his eyes and took a breath. “Please.” With all his heart, he prayed to any power that was listening. 
With a flick of his wrist, he tossed the hat to the ground, as he had done a thousand different times in a hundred different worlds. The hat spun and he waited for it to keep spinning, waited for it to grow larger and disappear into a whirlpool of purple smoke. He waited for the hole in the whirlpool, the portal that could take him anywhere.
But the hat barely made a full rotation before it stopped spinning. It sat on the ground, unmoving, unmagical.
Jefferson stared at it, until his vision blurred with tears. Then he began to laugh. 
Of course it didn’t work! Why would anything work in this world? Of course there was no escape! Of course he was going to die in this world! Or worse--he would live forever in a world without time and he’d never see Leona again.
He sobbed. His legs gave out and sent him careening to the floor. He lay face down on the patterned carpet, stared at Emma Swan’s misshapen hat, and wept like a child. 
****
Later--an hour? A year? Did it make a difference?--when couldn’t cry anymore, Jefferson pulled himself off the floor. He made it all the way to the chair before he collapsed again and hung his head in his hands. 
It hadn’t worked. The Savior hadn’t worked. The side of goodness hadn’t worked. Well, Jefferson was never one to get too hung up about paltry matters like good and evil. 
Slowly wheeling the office chair over to the desk, Jefferson fumbled for the silver telephone. He pushed in numbers he knew by heart, numbers he had wanted to call a dozen times in the past month, but never had. Not until now.
He tried to breathe, as the phone rang. But then he stopped when he heard it pick up. A woman’s voice. Belle’s voice.
“Mr. Gold’s residence. Who is calling?”
Jefferson didn’t speak. He didn’t breathe. Mrs. Gold knew that he had slept with her husband. He couldn’t ask her to put him on the phone. He couldn’t even let her know who he was.
He hung up.
With another deep breath, he pulled a book with yellow pages out from a shelf above the desk. He flipped through the thin paper, until he found the name and number he was looking for.
He dialed slowly, taking a breath between each number. He couldn’t sound like he was upset. He couldn’t show any weakness in front of her. 
This was a bad idea. This was the worst idea he could have ever come up with. The last time he’d worked with this woman he had watched her murder a helpless servant once she was no longer useful. How could he know that she wouldn’t do the same to him?
Maybe by the time he wasn’t useful, he would already be in the Discworld.  
He needed magic. He needed to get out. He needed power. So he called the most powerful person in town.  
Regina picked up on the third ring. “Who exactly do you think you are to be calling my home at this time of night?”
“Your Majesty,” he said calmly. “This is Jefferson the realm-jumper. I’d like to offer my services.” 
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