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taetaespeaches · 2 years

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“Jin, just get in the car.”

seokjin x platonic!reader (oc); feat. yoongi and namjoon genre: crack word count: 8.7K

a/n: Ok lovelies! Here we Jin hanging out with platonic reader/Kid (Yoongi’s girlfriend) sort of against his will when she picks him up from his eye doctor appointment. It’s pure crack, she’s a terrible driver, there’s TONS of references to ridiculous songs, and lots of bickering and finding each other kind of hilarious. I hope you all enjoy and thanks so much for reading this overly massive crack fic :))

p.s. Here’s reader’s/Kid’s playlist, made by my best friend (the girl who inspired Kid) Madi (@aurorassadprosee): caution: gay idiot driving. The songs from this playlist are literally all throughout this fic so it might be fun to listen as you read <3

As your eyes dragged over the book propped up against your legs, you couldn’t help but lose track of the words as your attention drifted to Yoongi. He was sitting in his desk chair, Namjoon leaning over his shoulder as they examined a beat that was displayed on the computer screen. You thought the song sounded great but they were both in agreement that certain elements of the song weren’t quite up to par.

You watched as Yoongi leaned back against his chair, hands brushing through his hair roughly as he groaned. Shortly after, Namjoon sighed, looking around the room for a brief moment until he spotted a spare chair. “Well,” Namjoon noted as he grabbed the back of the chair and tugged it towards your boyfriend. He had resigned himself to the fact that their issue with the song would take a bit to figure out.

As Yoongi let out a sigh, he suddenly snapped his head in the direction of his phone, startling you. “Shit, what time is it?” He asked no one in particular as he checked the device. It was thirty-five minutes to noon, you noted as you checked your own phone. “Fuck, I’m supposed to pick Jin up from the eye doctor.”

“Wait, why couldn’t he drive himself?” You asked, worried about your boyfriend’s best friend.

“He just had to get dilated so he didn’t want to drive in case his eyes were all fucked,” Yoongi told you. When you asked if his girlfriend was available, Yoongi shook his head. “She’s at work, couldn’t get away.”

“What time are you supposed to be there?” Namjoon asked.

“Around noon,” Yoongi replied, dragging his hand over his face. “Shit.”

“What about sending our manag-”

“I can get him,” you suddenly interjected, both men turning to look at you slowly. They both gawked at you for a moment, making you shrug at them questioningly. Namjoon responded to the gesture with a cackle, his head ducking forward, while Yoongi simply stared at you with an expression of incredulity. “What?”

“I’m not sure Jin would appreciate that the way you think he would,” Yoongi told you, Namjoon still chuckling beside him.

“Hey,” you protested, “offensive.” Yoongi sighed once again as you cocked your head at him. “I like to be helpful.”

“I know you do but-”

“Just give me the keys,” you insisted, tossing your book on the table and standing up. Holding your hand out to him, you glanced down at your hands. “If you leave now you’ll miss a breakthrough on this song and you’ll regret it.”

“Namjoon was just about to suggest a great idea where we have our manager go and get him,” Yoongi noted, pointing out to you that there were indeed other options than sending you, the woman notoriously known amongst your friends as a terrible driver.

“He’s busy, leave him alone,” you countered. “Yoongi. Trust me.” Yoongi thought for a moment, turning to look at Namjoon who shrugged at him.

“I’ve never died riding with her,” Namjoon bargained.

“See,” you pointed at Namjoon. “And I’ve driven him a million times.”

Scoffing, Yoongi shook his head, though he dug his car keys out of his pocket. “Jin is going to kill me,” he noted to himself.

“If I don’t do it first,” you joked, your timing horrendous as Yoongi’s eyes popped wide open. “Ba dum tss,” you added, the man gawking at you. “It was a joke,” you quickly defended. “Lighten up, Min.”

Looking up at you with his keys in hand, he shot you a pleading expression. “No more jokes,” he warned, making you nod innocently at him. “Just, be careful.”

“I always am,” you insisted, taking the keys from him and tossing them twice in your palm.

“Wait, why my car?” Yoongi suddenly realized, his eyebrows pulled together in question, his hand reaching for yours as if he wanted to reclaim his keys.

“Mine’s almost out of gas,” you told him nonchalantly. “Like, the empty light is on.”

“Jesus Christ, Kid,” Yoongi huffed, his expression softening when you pouted at him. “We’ll gas it up tonight,” he accepted, used to these kinds of antics from you. Leaning toward him, you pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

“My hero,” you teased, smirking at him. “Oh my god,” you suddenly gasped, startling both men as Yoongi flinched and Namjoon jolted slightly, both of them staring at you with wide eyes. “I get to show him my driving playlist.” The playlist was a newer thing, and you were pretty sure Jin was one of the last ones among your friends to hear it, not having driven with you for a while.

You caught the way Yoongi’s lips curved up into a smile at the mention of the driving playlist. “My song is Lgbt by cupcakKe,” Yoongi informed Namjoon, trying to hold back his gummy grin and maintain a disinterested attitude, but failing.

“And Strawberry Kisses,” you reminded him. “One of Australia’s finest contributions to the world.” Namjoon pulled a face of question as he pondered the song title.

“I don’t know that one,” he told you, making you point to his phone in his hands.

“Nikki Webster, look it up,” you told him, ignoring the way Yoongi shook his head at you. “I’ve been missing your strawberry kisses, ‘cause nothing’s as sweet, the taste still drives me crazy,” you sang, looking at Yoongi to find him smiling at you as he continued shaking his head.

Namjoon let out an amused chuckle at you, looking up from his phone to watch your short performance. “My song became Coconuts last year, right?” he asked.

“Kim Petras,” you added with a nod. “A modern day classic.”

“Is that the ‘you can put em in your mouth’ song you make me listen to?” Yoongi asked, confusion written across his features.

“Don’t act like you don’t know the song, Honey Boy.”

Ignoring you, he instead asked, “why that song?”

“Namtiddies,” you pointed out.

“My-yeah. Tiddies,” Namjoon said quietly, a bit shy. However, he couldn’t hold back his smile either as Yoongi chuckled in disbelief.

“Anyway,” Yoongi changed the topic. “Jin is in Yeongdeungpo, can you handle that?”

“That far? Aren’t there hundreds of eye doctors in Gangnam?” Yoongi’s eyes widened as he waited for you to answer his question. “Of course, I can handle that,” you defended dismissively. “Have a little faith, Min.” However, when he told you the address, you stared blankly at him. And when he started giving you explicit directions, you waved him off. “Yeah, wherever that is, I’ll just use maps.”

Scoffing, Yoongi looked at you knowingly. “Right, because that’s worked so well before.” He did have a point, but you only called him crying one single time! It wasn’t like it was a regular occurrence, he was just holding this one unfortunate event over your head, which really wasn’t fair.

“Ok, that was one time,” you complained. “Like I said, have a little faith.”

“I’m trying to have faith but your track record is horrendous, Kid.” Namjoon chuckled again, making you shoot him a glare. “At least she has a license,” Yoongi defended you teasingly, suddenly becoming the only person who could criticize you. A knight in shining armor, truly, putting you down one moment only to jump to your defense the next.

“Yeah,” you added lamely. “Now let me leave, Jinnie’s chariot awaits!” Glancing at Namjoon, and allowing your eyes to drop to his chest, you placed your hands on your knees to become more level with his upper body. “Mary Kate and Ashley,” you sang from the song Coconuts. “I bid you adieu.”

“Did you just say goodbye to his tits?” Yoongi gawked at you.

“Did you just call my chest tits?” Namjoon questioned your boyfriend, biting back a smirk as he sat on the knowledge that he’d get to use that against Yoongi for years to come.

“Everybody love the twins,” you sang again with a shrug. Turning away from the boys, you began to make your exit toward the door, though you could hear Yoongi following behind you, his sock-clad feet shuffling along the floor. As you opened his studio door, he reached for your wrist.

“Hey, just- please be careful,” Yoongi pleaded. “I’m serious. For the love of god, do not crash my car and kill my best friend and girlfriend all in one go.”

“Was that listed in order of importance?” You asked, ignoring his plea. When he looked at you in confusion you began repeating his words. “Your car first, then Jin, then me- which I would prefer to be called the love of your life or something cute-”

“Kid,” Yoongi interrupted you with a serious expression, though as always, you could see the hint of amusement in his eyes and the slight quirk of his lips.

“I promise,” you groaned with an eye roll, though you couldn’t help but flash him a smile. “I’ll be careful, Yoongi.” The man hummed disbelievingly before leaning in and giving you one more soft kiss.

“You are the love of my life,” he whispered to you. “So come back safely.”

“That’s better,” you grinned. “I love you,” you told him sincerely, just before shaking his keys in his face.

Starting down the hall, you heard Yoongi mumble, “I love you, too, brat,” making you giggle to yourself as you pulled up the playlist on your phone that was specifically made for driving your boyfriend and your mutual friends around.

Before Yoongi’s studio door closed, you could just barely hear the hum of Strawberry Kisses playing from Namjoon’s phone. Maybe that would help inspire them for their song, you smirked.

Let the fun begin.

[line break]

Pulling up to the eye doctor’s office, you mentally patted yourself on the back. Only got lost once and only five minutes late. Spotting Yoongi’s car, Jin exited the building, a dorky throwaway pair of sunglasses secured on his face. It was one of the pairs that the eye doctor gives you after you’ve been dilated so the sun doesn’t blind you as you leave the office. Very chic.

Turning up your music, you rolled down the window so the soulful melody flooded out onto the sidewalk. Jin halted his steps as the tune of Ego by Beyoncé met his ears, alarming him. Bending over to peer inside the open window, you watched as his mouth fell open slightly. “Shit,” he let out in realization. “Where’s Yoongi?”

“Hey bestie!” You called out over the music. “He’s working! I’m here to chauffeur you, sir.” Jin stared in your direction, though you couldn’t see his eyes through the massive sunglasses.

“I’m not getting in with you,” he informed you.

“Jin, just get in the car.”

“I’m not getting in.”

“Come on,” you whined just as a person appeared down the sidewalk a little ways, and the chorus of the song started blasting through your speakers.

It’s too big, it’s too wide, it’s too strong, it won’t fit, it’s too much, it’s too tough- “What the hell-god dammit,” Jin complained, his legs moving quickly as he tried to get into the car before the oncoming passerby appeared next to the car and heard the song. As you watched Jin hustle, you defiantly turned the song up even louder, counteracting his movements.

“Would you stop blasting this song?” He asked as soon as he shut the car door, his fingers making quick work of finding the buttons on the side of the door. His actions were frantic as he was painfully aware of the stranger getting closer and closer to the car. The car doors suddenly locked and then unlocked, making you laugh evilly at his struggling.

He got a big ego, such a huge ego, I love his big ego, it’s too much.

Jin wasn’t fast enough with figuring out which button controlled the windows, the person walking by the car and very obviously registering the lyrics of the song as he slowed his steps and not so casually looked at you. You smiled and waved, the man awkwardly nodding at you while Jin tried to sink further into his seat, embarrassment flooding his senses, his ears already tinting red. As the window very slowly rolled up, Jin looked as though he wanted the seat to swallow him up. However, he still nodded politely, giving a tight-lipped smile to the stranger as you cackled at his expense.

He snapped his head in your direction as soon as the glass was fully raised. “What is wrong with you?”

“This is Beyoncé, Seokjin,” you informed him as if it was justification for your antics. “Queen B.” You were sure he was glaring but you couldn’t take him seriously with his dorky eyewear. “And I chose it specifically for you, you should be appreciative.”

“I wish you hadn’t,” he deadpanned, his face still pointed toward you.

“Hey, did you know I started dedicating a song to all of you when I drive you guys around,” you smiled proudly.

“I’m surprised they all let you drive them around still,” he muttered. “Or do you ambush them too?”

Ignoring him, you smirked. “I Kissed A Girl is your sweet Poopsie’s song.” The man cocked his head, but you didn’t give him time to respond. “I almost changed your song to something else but I decided against it,” you nodded at the radio, “because you know, this is very fitting with the whole massive ego thing, Mr. Worldwide Handsome. But I also kind of wanted to dedicate Hannah Montana’s Nobody’s Perfect to you, just to humble you.” The man sat in silence for a moment as though he was processing. “Everybody makes mistakes, Jin, everybody has those days-”

“Stop it,” Jin tried to cut you off.

“Nobody’s perfect!”

“Why didn’t Yoongi tell me you were getting me?” He spoke overtop you, making you have to hold back a giggle.

“Look, I got you a coffee,” you held up the ice beverage for Jin to inspect. “Does Yoongi do that?”

“Actually no,” he replied, taking the cup from you. Hesitating to take a drink, the man raised it toward his lips. “Thank you,” he mumbled just before taking a sip.

“See? Just trust me, this will be fun,” you assured him, watching as he turned to look out the window.

“Trusting you is easier said than done considering you almost hit a pedestrian the last time I rode with you, and you ran a red light the time before that,” he complained toward the car door, refusing to look at you.

“You’re being dramatic,” you rolled your eyes. “Like you said, I almost hit that pedestrian, but I didn’t. And people should know not to walk out in the street when I’m coming.” Jin couldn’t help but let out a silent laugh at your comment, the man shaking his head.

Inspecting his reflection in the side mirror, Jin tsked at himself. “Don’t worry, the song wasn’t necessary to humble me. These glasses are doing a good enough job already,” he chuckled at himself, just before taking another drink of the coffee.

“What?” you asked in outrage. “It’s a whole look.”

“It is not,” he scoffed, though a smile was planted on his face.

“It so is,” you insisted before grabbing your phone. “Hang on, hold still.”

“Why- no. No photos,” he held his hand up to block the camera from capturing his face.

“Jin, you look amazing as always, let me take your damn photo.” You watched as his shoulders slumped, making you roll your eyes. “You know what, I have the perfect song for this moment.” you held up a finger at him, silently telling him to wait as you searched through your playlist.

Jin huffed impatiently as you continued to hold up your finger, your other finger tapping on the screen with every swipe down the list of songs. After a brief moment of silence as he anticipated your next move, the car filled with a spoken piece, followed by an early 90s electronic beat, Jin waiting curiously to recognize the song.

“You better work, cover girl!” you began singing along to RuPaul’s Supermodel, Jin immediately letting out a squeaky laugh. “Work it, girl, give a twirl! Do your thing on the runway!”

“You’re insane,” Jin chuckled, you nodding at him as if you already knew that.

“Are you going to work it or not, Seokjin?” You cocked your head at him, waiting for him to pose for your awaiting camera. The man sighed, triggering you to prepare to scold him, but then the next moment he was pulling modelesque poses: pouting his lips, framing his face with his hands, and giving stern expressions that made him look serious and experienced in modeling.

All the while, RuPaul continued singing through the speakers, telling Jin that, “when you walked into the room, you had everybody’s eyes on you.”

“Excellent, you’re a supermodel, Jin, everything looks good on you,” you teasingly complimented as you repeated the lyrics.

When you started filming the man, he pulled the sunglasses down slightly so he could look over them. As soon as he did so, the sun struck his eyes, making him dramatically scramble to cover his face as he yelled out in pain. “Oh my god,” you laughed, “are you ok?” Instead of answering you, Jin simply let out a squeaky laugh and nodded. Smiling at him, you ended the video. “Good, let’s get this bitch on the road,” you patted the dashboard, just before discarding the phone in a compartment in the console. “You can look through those photos if you want,” you nodded to the phone. “But no deleting.”

Jin slowly picked the phone up, but before he could go to your photos, he stalled, inspecting the open playlist that was currently playing. “So this is the playlist, huh?” he asked, studying the cover photo which was a Kermit the Frog meme stating, “back by unpopular demand: me”. The title was “caution: gay idiot driving”. To make things worse, the description simply stated “put on ur seatbelt babes xo”.

“I can’t tell if it’s better that you’re so aware of your shitty driving or if it’s worse because you know and you still drive like shit,” he noted. You simply shrugged at him. “If you have to warn people to put their seatbelts on like this, maybe you shouldn’t be behind the wheel.”

“What do you mean?” You asked in defense. “Jin, it’s the law, I’m simply reminding you of that, you’re welcome. Safety first, pal. Seatbelts always.” With a sassy eyeroll, the man reached for the seatbelt and secured it into place across his body.

As you began pulling out onto the street, Jin asked, “so what are everyone else’s- jesus.”

Cutting him off with a slam of the brakes, you smiled guiltily. “Whoops,” you pulled a wince, Jin straightening up in his seat as he craned his neck to look at the traffic on the street. As you started inching forward, Jin started yelling at you to stop. “What?!” You asked in panic, just before a car honked behind you as you nearly rolled out in front of them. “Oh fuck off! Stop honking, it’s not like I hit you,” you ranted to the driver.

Before Jin could say anything, or really even react in any way, you pulled onto the street and started driving forward. Looking over at him, you caught him adjusting his seat belt and ensuring it was latched properly. When he looked up, he pulled the sunglasses off his face so you could see his incredulous expression, his eyes blown wide, almost comically so if it wasn’t for the terror swirling around them. “You’re gonna kill me this time, aren’t you?” He asked in doomed realization. Despite the sun hurting his eyes, tears pooling along his lash line, he ensured he kept the glasses off long enough for you to see his seriousness.

“No,” you retorted with scoff, Jin putting the sunglasses back over his face. “I’ve never been in an accident, I’ll have you know,” you defended yourself. You were met with a moment of silence that you filled when you recalled a past driving experience. “Well, there was that one time that I backed into a pole but that was hardly anything.”

“How many near accidents have you had?” He countered. Well. That number is a lot higher, you thought. “Should I even ask that? Is it better not knowing?”

“Jin, stop worrying and enjoy the ride,” you brushed him off. “Besides, I promised Yoongi I wouldn’t kill you so you’re safe.” Before he could respond to how un-assuring that was, just then, Charli XCX’s Vroom Vroom started playing, the opening lyric, “Let’s ride” blasting through the tension in the car in the most hilarious timing. “Listen, my song is on,” you smiled knowingly as Jin stared at you in shock.

Unfortunately, mostly for Jin, traffic was a shit show. It wasn’t so much an issue for you, but it did mean Jin would be stuck in the car with you longer. He really should be thankful, but the man had not yet loosened up. He’d get there, you were sure of it.

The car was mostly quiet as you drove among the mass of cars on the road, you giving Jin no real reason to worry for about three minutes. “Are your eyes ok?” You asked, Jin humming in confirmation. “Do you need to rest them? Does the sun hurt them? You can close them if you want,” you suggested, wanting to ensure Jin’s well being. Ironic, considering you were driving him.

“No, no, that’s ok, I’ll keep them open,” he insisted, nearly making you snort. As the song changed to Thot Shit by Megan Thee Stallion, you gasped, alarming Jin for a moment as though he was holding his breath.

“Oh! This is Peaches’ song,” you told him, turning it up slightly just as Jin exhaled with relief.

“Thot Shit is?” He confirmed. Smiling slightly, he shook his head. “Why is that?”

“Because she’s basically the hottest, coolest person ever,” you said as though it was obvious. You were speaking facts.

“I think you’re the only one who thinks that,” he commented with a smile, enjoying teasing the girl he was truly very fond of. If there was anyone who could irritate Jin more than you, it was Peaches. “Wait,” he suddenly recalled your earlier information. “Why is Poopsie I Kissed A Girl?” Smirking at him, Jin cocked his head in question. “Please tell me you haven’t kissed my girlfriend.”

“God no, I wish,” you said, Jin scoffing in both relief and disbelief. “She’s just hot, a girl’s gotta fantasize, Seokjin.”

“Well stop fantasizing about my girlfriend,” Jin demanded, though you could tell he quite enjoyed someone talking to him about how attractive his girlfriend was.

“Don’t worry, she’s obsessed with you,” you told him as though you were annoyed by it.

“The feelings are mutual,” he noted. “Too bad I’ll never see her again because you’re gonna kill me.”

“Oh shut up, you’re fine,” you rolled your eyes. In poor timing, you tapped the breaks quickly. Jin gripped the arm rest as he looked for a reason for you to be break checking him. “Sorry, my foot slipped.”

He took a moment to simply breathe as you stole glances at him, waiting for your beratement. Choosing to move on, suddenly deciding he was mature or something, he relaxed in his seat just slightly. “What’s everyone else’s songs?”

“Oh would I love to tell you,” you started through a growing grin. Jin simply chuckled in response, settling in for your ridiculous explanations. “Well, Yoongi is Lgbt by cupcakKe, in honor of the bi wife agenda,” you smiled at your boyfriend’s expense. “And because ya know, he’s rolling with me.”

“Right, ‘gay idiot’,” Jin referenced the name of your playlist.

“And he’s also Strawberry Kisses,” you told him, Jin shrugging at you cluelessly. “Why do none of you know this song?” You complained with an eyeroll. “Anyways, Hobi is Material Girl by Madonna.”

“Obviously,” Jin chuckled, nodding in agreement.

“Obviously,” you repeated with a giggle of your own. “And Petal is I’m A Slave 4 U, because, well, she’s sexy and I would do anything for that woman.”

“I love that song,” Jin suddenly announced, placing his hands to his knees and attempting to do a slut drop from a seated position, making you cackle loudly as you reached for the phone. “Hey,” he ripped it out of your hand, shooting you a glare over the sunglasses where they slipped down his nose slightly. “No phone while driving.”

“Ok fine, but put the song on,” you told him, Jin following your direction and finding one of Britney’s best songs. “It’s Britney, bitch!” you announced as the song started playing. Grooving along to the beat, you continued through your list of songs for your mutual besties. “Taehyung is That Don’t Impress Me Much by Shania Twain.”

“Great song,” Jin nodded in approval.

“For sure slayage,” you agreed as you started doing the choreo to I’m A Slave 4 U. “And it’s perfect for Tae because he has that whole vibe check, I mean, I swear he can be so hard to impress.”

It wasn’t until you swerved into the lane next to you that Jin looked over at you and clocked you doing choreo behind the steering wheel. “Goddammit,” he complained, tapping your arm. “Can you pay attention to the road? Now is not the time to be dancing.”

“You did it first,” you whined, putting both hands back on the wheel.

“I’m not driving. And even if I was, I’m not you. You specifically are not allowed to dance while driving,” he told you.

“You know, you’re getting lame in your old age,” you teased him, grabbing a drink of your iced coffee.

Sighing for the hundredth time since being in the car with you, Jin crossed his arms over his chest. “Ok, go on. What’s Namjoon?”

“Oh! Namjoon is Coconuts by Kim Petras because his boobs are huge,” you said excitedly.

Jin smirked at the comment as he looked straight ahead. “His chest really is massive.”

Rolling your eyes, you scoffed at him. “You are never beating the husbands allegations with that smirk, Jin, fix your damn face.”

“I’m not trying to beat any allegations-” he began ranting. “He works out, of course his pecks are huge, he’s always in the gym these days, you expect me not to notice?!” Laughing loudly at him, you glanced at him as he took another drink of his coffee.

“Is the coffee good?” You asked nonchalantly, pretending as though he didn’t just have a very Jin-like outburst.

“Very,” he said shortly but loudly, still in rant mode, making you hold back more laughter.

“Good. Anyways, Daisy is Maneater by Nelly Furtado,” you continued going through your songs. That made Jin smile as he nodded his head.

“Fitting.”

“Right? ‘You either wanna be with me or be me,’ like that’s her,” you said, noting lyrics from the song. “And then you have Jimin and Dear. Jimin is Hot Girl by Charli XCX.”

“What?” Jin snorted, looking at you in expectation of your explanation.

“He’s literally the ‘it’ boy. I don’t make the rules, Seokjin.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “I’m a hot girl, pop girl, rich girl, I’m a bitch girl ‘catch me if you can’ girl,” you sang the song, Jin awing in realization.

“You’re actually so good at this,” he commended you. “That’s so fitting.”

“I know,” you agreed. “Trust me on this, I know you guys. So Dear is Fantasy by Queen Mariah. Because I have the biggest crush on her,” you said dreamily. “She’s so cute.”

“You have a thing for everyone,” Jin pointed out, making you glare at him.

“It’s literally not my fault you guys all date the most beautiful girls I’ve ever met.” You had a point, and you both knew it. “Oh my god, are you ready to hear Jungkook’s song?” You asked, excited to share this information with him.

“I actually am,” he giggled. “Do tell.”

“Ok, first, Holly. I Would by One Direction,” you told him, smiling widely at your own cleverness. “It has the lyric about the tattoos,” you reminded him when he didn’t quite get just how good your song choice was. “Oh my god, Jin, go to the song.”

You waited as he found the song in your playlist, all while Dirrty by Christina Aguilera played throughout the car. “Who’s your favorite One Direction member? Your bias if you will.”

“What?”

“If it’s not Niall, you’re wrong.”

“It’s Harry,” he told you.

“Jin,” you said disappointedly, the song’s acoustic guitar intro cutting you off as you gasped. “Oh my god, ok, skip to the second verse.”

“How am I supposed to find the second verse,” he directed to you, causing you to turn and glare at him. “I don’t know this song,” he defended himself from your judgment.

“Jin, you’re literally a musical artist, you know the approximate time a second verse would start,” you pointed out, still staring at him.

“Ok, jesus, can you look at the road?” he pointed out the windshield. “Like now, oh my god,” he cried out as you barely hit the breaks in time before you would have bumped into the car in front of you. “I can’t stand you right now.”

“Oh, chill. That’s an exaggeration,” you held back a smirk.

“I don’t think it is,” he retorted.

“Look, now it’s at the second verse,” you nodded to the screen that displayed the map of Seoul on the dashboard, though an address wasn’t entered into it. A slight oversight on your part, but you weren’t about to tell Jin that you may be a bit lost. Another sigh left Jin as you started singing along. “Back in my head we were kissing,” you smiled. “This is the verse.”

“Yeah, I’m aware,” he said through a small laugh. One thing you truly adored about Jin was his ability to play along even when you were annoying him. He was never too serious, and you always had fun with the guy. Even if sometimes it was at his expense. He was a good sport. “Feels like I’m constantly playing a game that I’m destined to lose,” you continued singing. “It’s right here,” you said excitedly between the vocals. “‘Cause I can’t compete with your boyfriend, he’s got 27 tattoos!”

“Oh my god,” Jin let out a squeaky laugh, genuinely amused by Jungkook’s resemblance to the lyrics. “That’s too good.”

Reaching for your phone, Jin’s laughter halted as he glared at you. “We’re at a red light, Jin, just let me find Jungkook’s song.” Letting go of the phone, you quickly started searching for the song. As you scrolled through the hours worth of music, Jin alerted you to the fact that the light was green.

“It’s green,” he told you.

“One second.”

“No, it’s green. You’re holding up traffic.”

“I just need to find this-” you were cut off by a horn honking behind you.

“Do you even hear that? Or does it happen so often that you don’t even register it anymore?”

“Hear what?” You asked, Jin’s shoulders dropping. “There,” you noted cheerfully as you clicked on the song. “Shut up,” you huffed, shooting a look of disgust in your rearview mirror at the person behind you.

“So you do hear it.” Pressing the gas a little too carelessly, the car jolted forward, tossing Jin against the back of his seat. “Jesus,” he breathed out, you giggling guiltily.

“Sorry,” you winced. “Ok but the song.”

Jin listened for a moment, recognizing the song but not placing it quite yet. As the chorus hit however, a hilarious squeaky laugh erupted from the man as he nodded and clapped in amused approval.

I fell in love with an emo girl, I’m in love with an emo girl, blasted through your speakers as you started jokingly headbanging to the song. “That’s the best one of all of them,” Jin exclaimed through his laughter.

Giggling with him, Jin joined you in headbanging. As you sang along to the song, both of you falling into laughter while you tossed your hair around, Jin headbanged a little too hard and sent his disposable sunglasses flying across the car and smacking your window, falling into your lap. A scream left you in surprise as Jin looked over at you in shock.

“Holy shit,” you exhaled, clutching your heart. “I thought I hit something.”

Jin couldn’t help but laugh at your admittal. “I’m surprised you didn’t,” he joked as you handed him his glasses back.

“You need to be careful, you’ll break those,” you noted, nodding at the glasses as he put them back on his face just before striking another model-like pose.

“That would be a travesty.”

Finally Jin had relaxed, and you both were having fun listening to your ridiculous playlist. You knew this drive could be really fun for you and Jin, and it had been way too long since you hung out with him just the two of you. Not that having Yoongi and Poopsie with was ever a bad thing, but it was just nice to hang out with your friend one on one every now and then. However, you finally realized the oversight you made before, and unfortunately you’d have to let Jin in on the issue.

As he jammed next to you, rocking his body back and forth to Ariana Grande’s 34+35, you quickly looked toward him nervously. The motion was fast but it was enough to catch his attention. When you did it again, he was already looking at you.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, his tone already worried.

“Ok, it’s not the worst news but like it’s still bad news,” you started, glancing over at Jin only for him to push a finger against your jaw, immediately forcing you to look straight ahead again.

“Just tell me,” he sighed. “And keep your eyes on the road.”

“Well, I was vibing because you’re so fun,” you attempted to soften him up with flattery. “And I’m pretty sure I took several wrong turns and now I have no idea where we are.”

A snort left Jin as he looked at the screen displaying a map. “There’s no address in that, is there,” he realized. As you shook your head, Jin laughed breathily. “You know what, I actually think this is my fault, I should have known this would happen and therefore I should have been navigating.”

“You’re right,” you agreed, feeling the way Jin’s eyes bore into your skull despite not being able to see them at all as his eyes were still shielded by the silly sunglasses.

“You’re unbelievable,” he protested, just as Paris Hilton’s Stars Are Blind, started playing.

“What did I do?” You asked in offense, your mouth falling open in shock.

“You’re not supposed to agree, this is clearly your fault,” he argued as he typed the Hybe building’s address into his phone. “Don’t worry, I’ll get us out of your mess.”

“Oh whatever,” you rolled your eyes, looking out your window. “I love this song,” you added quietly.

“I do too,” Jin agreed, both of your biting back smiles. “Ok, you keep going straight for another block.”

“So the next street I turn what? Right?”

“Yes. Wait,” he then said, looking at the phone and then at the street signs. “Shit, that was our turn, why does it tell you the turn is coming so late?” He asked. “It’s like turn in a quarter mile and then bam you missed your turn,” he ranted, you rolling your eyes but smirking as you finally found yourself on the upper ground.

“Maybe you just have a hard time following simple directions,” you teased, Jin scoffing at you as you smiled victoriously.

“Ok take the next right, it’ll take us to the right street anyways. Following his instructions, you turned the car and began down a new street. “Alright, now get into the left lane, we need to turn up here.

“Mmm,” you hummed, looking out the front windshield suspiciously. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure, what do you mean, am I sure?” He questioned you, his voice raising in volume and pitch as he prepared to dive into another rant. “Get in the left lane, you’re gonna miss the turn.”

“But this doesn’t look right,” you second guessed him, continuing in the middle lane.

“Get over!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!”

Still not fully trusting his navigation, you kept driving straight, Jin sighing harshly as he sat back in his seat and looked out his window. “Are you kidding me right now?”

“Oh shit,” you looked down the street, realizing that you missed the turn. “Was that really the turn?”

“Of course it was, like I told you ten times. Get in the left lane,” he repeated his earlier command.

“I wasn’t sure!” You defended yourself.

“Take the next left. Please.”

“Ok, I will,” you told him through a small smile, Jin shaking his head as he bit back a grin of his own. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” he chuckled, both of you relaxing once again. After you made the correct turn, a slower song you didn’t really know started playing, making you look toward Jin in confusion.

“What the hell is this?” You asked, Jin lowering his sunglasses to shoot you a look of disbelief.

“This is- are you serious? This is Coldplay. It’s literally your playlist,” he pointed out to you.

“Coldplay?”

“It’s actually a really good song, I’m surprised it’s on here.”

“Not as surprised as me,” you said, thinking to yourself as you tried to figure out why this song was on your driving playlist. “Hey, wait, what do you mean it’s actually a good song and that you’re surprised it’s on here.”

“I-” he started, sighing to himself once again. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Thin ice, buddy.”

“Right, so why is Magic on your playlist if you don’t even know the song?” He asked you, intrigued by your surprise at the song.

“Magic,” you repeated. “I’m not a man in his forties, I have no idea why Coldplay is on here.”

“Hey, I like Coldplay and I’m not that old, you bully,” he commented in defense of himself.

“Wait, it’s called Magic?” Nodding at you, you smiled in realization. “I thought I put Magic by One Direction on here.”

“You’re joking,” he snorted, resting his head against the glass as he chuckled at you. “Ok, now it makes sense.”

“If I were to put a Coldplay song on here it would be feature BTS,” you said as though it was the only option. “My Universe or nothing.”

“Ok, now that’s valid,” Jin agreed, pressing next on the song, Can’t Believe It by Flo Rida and Pitbull playing next with the opening line, damn, that white girl got some ass. “And we’re back,” he noted, smiling at the song. “Take the next right.”

“Thanks, co-pilot,” you nodded, preparing to get into the right lane. As you hit the blinker, you somehow switched on the windshield wipers, sending them into full speed. “Aah!” You screamed, Jin jolting in his seat. “I don’t want those on.”

“Can you not scream while driving unless it’s an emergency, you’re gonna give me a heart attack,” Jin complained, clutching his chest.

“Jin, I don’t know how to turn these off,” you ignored him, panicking over the wipers that thrashed against the dry glass.

“You just turn the dial on the shift, I don’t even know how you turned them on, honestly,” Jin calmly explained to you. “Can you get into the right lane?”

Haphazardly looking in your right side mirror, you started going into the right lane, only for the car behind you to honk at you. Again. “Oh my god,” Jin groaned in embarrassment, causing you to wince at the upset you caused in both the driver behind you and your passenger.

You quickly slid into the lane, the car behind you switching lanes immediately and driving up next to you. As you glanced over and Jin looked over your body at the driver, they flipped you off before speeding away, Jin gasping at their action. “Oh fuck you!” You yelled at the person, just before taking your turn.

“Yeah, fuck you! Asshole!” Jin added, yelling after them, making you smile at his support. “People are so rude.” Then, however, he turned his attention to you. “Check your mirrors before you just switch lanes, this is driving 101.”

“I did!” You defended as the windshield wipers still sped across the glass. “Can you help me with these?” You asked, gesturing to the buttons on the turn signal lever.

“Just hit the switch, it’s right there,” he glanced over. “That one.”

“This one?” You asked, flipping it back and forth, adjusting the speed of the wipers, slowing them and speeding them up repeatedly. Jin stared at you for a moment as you struggled, as though he was trying to figure out how you could be so academically smart but such an idiot behind the wheel. Finally, you turned the switch all the way down, the wipers finally halting. Sighing in relief, you could see Jin shaking his head out of the corner of your eye. “You know, it’s not that easy to drive when I know you’re over there judging me.”

“Well it’s not easy to ride with you,” he retorted. “So I guess we’re even in that regard- oh, look, still on,” he pointed out when the wipers squeaked across the dry windshield once again.

“Fuck,” you complained. As you looked down at the controls, Jin pointed ahead.

“Please just leave them and focus on the road,” he begged. “We’re almost there.” Hesitantly, you placed your hand back on the wheel and straightened your posture as you tried to gauge Jin’s mood.

Worried that you had upset the man, you turned the music down slightly as you traveled down the busy Seoul streets, making a conscious effort to keep your hands at ten and two on the steering wheel. Cascada’s Evacuate The Dance Floor hummed lowly from the speakers, only interrupted every ten seconds by the squeaking sound of the windshield wipers dragging across the dry glass. Jin was staring out his window, completely unaware of the comedy of the situation. Glancing over at him every few seconds, you wondered how you could fix the vibe. From all the years of teasing Jin, you had never actually angered him. This was very new.

And then Jin turned toward you, a wide smile on his face as a laugh that resembled the sound of the wipers when they were on a faster speed rolled out of his mouth. “This is so ridiculous,” he wheezed, immediately putting your concerns at ease as you tossed your head back in laughter, both in relief and hilarity.

Jin continued to chuckle as he rested his head against the headrest and stared ahead at the road. The song came to a close, being replaced by Shaggy, It Wasn’t Me. Both you and Jin reached for the volume at the same time, you being just a bit quicker as you giggled while turning it up. “Now this is my jam,” you announced.

“Honey came in and she caught me red-handed, creepin' with the girl next door,” you both sang, smiling at yourselves and the silliness of your current activity. “Picture this, we were both butt naked, bangin' on the bathroom floor, how could I forget that I had given her an extra key? All this time she was standin' there, she never took her eyes off me”, you both sang, swaying from side to side to the beat.

As you stopped singing at the start of the first verse, Jin shockingly continued rapping along, your jaw dropping to your lap as you gawked at him. Jin bit back a smile as he continued the verse, ignoring your reaction. Between his rapping, and the fact that he was still wearing those ridiculous sunglasses, you were certain you had never seen a funnier more shocking sight in your life.

“Why- how do you know this song so well?” You finally pulled yourself out of shock enough to ask, Jin letting his smile break through. His ears were tinted red, but he continued with the song. “Rapper Jin?!” You yelled excitedly, taking your hands off the steering wheel as you pretended to bow down to him.

Without missing a beat, Jin simply reached across the console and held onto the bottom of the wheel, keeping the car steady within the lane. As the pre-chorus started, you started singing again, you and Jin switching back and forth. When you sang, “But she caught me on the counter,” Jin followed up with “Wasn’t me.”

“Saw me bangin' on the sofa,” you sang.

“Wasn't me,” Jin responded.

“I even had her in the shower.”

“It wasn't me,” Jin sang, raising his hands up and waving them in front of his chest as though he was denying the accusation in the song.

“She even caught me on camera!” You exclaimed, Jin maintaining his cool as he yet again sang, “Wasn’t me.”

You crumbled into laughter, going as far as resting your forehead on top of the steering wheel as you wheezed, Jin pushing you lightly as he squeakily laughed. “Eyes on the road,” he told you through his laughter, making you gather yourself enough to sit up and at least look ahead of you. You both continued to dance and sing for the remainder of the song, though your giggles never fully disappeared, both of you losing your composure at random, triggering the other one to burst into bouts of laughter all over again.

When the song ended, a fast club-like electronic beat started playing. You sang along to the song as Jin eyed you suspiciously, not trusting the direction the song was going. When the chorus hit, you singing with it proudly, “Treat me like a slut, little dirty bitch, I love to fuck,” Jin groaned before a breathy laugh escaped his lips.

“This is Kim Petras, Jin,” you told him as though that should clear things up as to why it was an absolute bop.

“If you killed us right now, they would include this in the news article,” Jin informed you. When you looked at him questioningly, he sighed. “BTS’ Jin dies in horrific car accident. Witnesses reported that ‘Treat Me Like A Slut’ was blasting from the remnants of the totaled vehicle,” he mimicked a fake news report, painting the picture for you.

“Oh my god, I’ve actually had that thought before!” You exclaimed. “I was FaceTiming Holly one day and I literally almost died when this truck pulled out and almost ran right into the side of my car, and-”

“Are you sure the truck pulled out and almost hit you? Not the other way around?” He interrupted skeptically.

“Believe it or not, yes,” you told him sassily. “Anyways! Teenage Dream but the Glee version, you know the one sung by Blaine? That was playing, and I did have the thought that if I did get in an accident, that’s what would be playing.”

“I’m honestly surprised you’ve only had this thought once,” Jin remarked, making you giggle because the dude did have a point. “Holy shit,” he then realized, placing both hands on the window as he gazed at the building just beside you. “We made it.”

“Of course we made it,” you rolled your eyes. “I’m not as awful as everyone thinks I am.”

Scoffing at you, Jin ignored the comment, simply choosing to stare at the building in gratitude. As you parked the car, you mentally patted yourself on the back: another car ride with the gang and no one died.

Pulling up to the curb, you slightly nudged it with the tire, the car shaking much more violently than it should have. Jin’s “jesus christ,” slipped from his lips as he turned toward you one more time.

“Sorry,” you smiled with amused guilt. At that moment, All Too Well by Taylor Swift started playing in the car. As soon as you parked the car, which automatically unlocked the doors, Jin reached for the door handle, trying to get the hell out of there. Quickly, you locked the doors again before placing your hand against Jin’s chest and shoving him back against the seat.

“What the hell-”

“We have to sit in here and listen to this,” you informed him. “You can’t just walk out of the car during Taylor Swift, Jin.”

“Sure you can, you just get out-”

“No.” You and Jin stared at each other for a moment before Jin sighed, relenting, and you smiling as you started singing along. “Oh yeah, it’s the 10 minute version.”

“I’m going to kill you,” Jin deadpanned, making you giggle as you settled in your seat, swaying along to the obnoxiously long tune.

Finally stepping into Yoongi’s studio, both Yoongi and Namjoon turned towards you both with wide eyes. Yoongi appeared visibly relieved you actually made it back in one piece, which you immediately took offense to. Before even greeting you, he looked at Jin, inspecting him slightly. “You all good?”

“Hey, what about me?” You complained.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Jin replied with a nod.

“Did she drive ok?” Yoongi asked in surprise, Namjoon looking just as shocked beside him.

“Hey!”

“Oh god no,” Jin responded dramatically. “But we made it.”

Finally Yoongi looked at you to find you glaring at him. “They’re reasonable questions, Kid,” Yoongi told you, biting back a smile. “How are you?”

“I’m offended,” you answered jokingly, all the boys in the room laughing. Wrapping your arm around Jin’s shoulders, tugging him to your height, you pressed your cheek against the top of his head, the man resisting the contact but not pulling away. “We had fun!”

“She did get me a coffee,” Jin mumbled just as you released him from your hold. “No one else around here does that for me.”

“And the playlist?” Namjoon questioned, Jin sighing though his features softened. “What’s your song?”

“Ego,” Jin sighed through a small grin. “Beyoncé.”

Yoongi let out a breathy chuckle, his shoulders shaking as he stared at you fondly, while Namjoon laughed and nodded in amusement.

“Honestly, I'm just glad you didn't show up with your own car and that fucking bumper sticker,” Jin then told you as he meandered toward the sofa.

Gasping at him, you shot him a glare. “Hey, that shit is hilarious and you know it."

The bumper sticker under scrutiny sat proudly on the left side of your bumper and stated: Jesus is my copilot and we’re cruising for pussy. It simply was hilarious, and Jin could not seriously deny that as he finally admitted, “... yeah it is.”

“I bought that for her,” Yoongi interjected, as though he needed credit for the hilarity of the sticker. You remembered coming across it in a little shop, Yoongi pointing it out to you. Both of you laughed so hard over it that Yoongi couldn’t resist buying it for you. He even cleaned the spot on your bumper and put it on for you, the man crumbling to the ground as soon as he took a look at its finished state while you stood behind him filming him as you cackled excitedly.

“Didn’t a cop recite it to you after pulling you over?” Namjoon recalled.

“That cop was an asshole, I was hardly even speeding. I think he was just annoyed by the sticker,” you complained.

“He was an asshole, but it was also mortifying hearing him read the sticker to us,” Yoongi said, chuckling once again as he shook his head.

“No sense of humor.” Pulling out your phone, you grinned at Yoongi before turning and looking at Jin. “You know who does have a sense of humor though,” you started, Jin already about to rise from his seat to stop you. “Look at this video of Jin posing to RuPaul in his dorky sunglasses,” you said gleefully, skipping over to Yoongi as Jin followed behind you.

“You said it was a whole look!” Jin ranted, you tossing your head in laughter as you pressed play on the video for Jin’s friends to enjoy.

375 notes · View notes

cordiallyfuturedwight · 8 months

Text

jin's september message (feat. taehyung) 💌

1K notes · View notes

whyse7vn · 6 months

Text

FWB -

[ot7 x reader]

NAMJOON -

namjoon: u like sunflowers?

y/n: you need to stop giving me flowers after we fuck

namjoon: why?

y/n: people don’t do that?

namjoon: i do?

y/n: and i have way too many flowers in my house rn

we like fuck a lot….

namjoon: but i like getting you flowers

y/n: i know

namjoon: do you not like flowers?

y/n: i do

namjoon: so i should get these sunflowers rn is what ur telling me

y/n: you do not need to get me anything

we fuck cuz i think ur hot and ur convenient

NOT because you get me flowers

namjoon: oh

y/n: oh?

namjoon: ok

y/n: don’t tell me i hurt your feelings

namjoon: you didn’t hurt my feelings

y/n: are you lying to me?

namjoon: a little bit

y/n: namjoon….

namjoon: i’m sorry….

y/n: this is not very no strings attached of you

namjoon: baby :(

y/n: YOU made that rule might i add

namjoon: i take it back

y/n: you can’t take it back

namjoon: i just did

y/n: ur just horny

namjoon: am not

i just like you

a lot actually

i like you a lot

can’t help but buy you flowers

y/n: joon

namjoon: yes baby

y/n: /&/&&&;&;&;

you make me sick

i REFUSE to blush and giggle rn

you do this all the time

u nasty little freak

act like you’re deeply in love with me or something

and then just ghost me for 100 years

and come back when u wanna fuck again

namjoon: not true at all

i ignored you for 2 days

ONE time

y/n: so you ignored me on purpose???

namjoon: you know i would never

was super busy i promise baby :(

y/n: i can feel ur horniness through the screen

namjoon: can you feel all the love i have for you as well??

y/n: see you ARE horny

namjoon: out of love and appreciation

y/n: whatever

namjoon: i’m standing in the middle of this florist looking like and idiot

come on baby

sunflowers yes or no?

y/n: no namjoon

and anways jin is at mine rn

so ur gonna have to wait until he leaves

and that’s IF he leaves

namjoon: that’s ok jin’s a very busy man these days ofc he’ll leave

i can wait

y/n: jin is not a busy man at all

you and i both know that 💀

he’s literally been crying in gc about how bored he’s been at home

namjoon: he has?

y/n: yeah literally yesterday

and the day before that

namjoon: maybe i didn’t see that

y/n: you need to read the gc more silly!

namjoon: ur right baby i do

y/n: ofc i’m right

namjoon: of course :)

y/n: …..

are u fr……

this is not fair

why is he leaving?????????????

namjoon

…

this was supposed be our catch up time☹️

what did you say to him????

and WHY is he listening to you

namjoon: didn’t say anything

told you he’s a busy man baby

y/n: shut the fuck up

namjoon: not nice :(

y/n: idc actually!

namjoon: you do

y/n: bring me tulips you slut

JIMIN -

jimin: you need to buy more bread

y/n: ???

jimin: you have no bread

buy some more

y/n: are you in my house rn????

jimin: come home the kids miss you

y/n: motherfucker

jimin: i’m more of a you fucker!

y/n: shut up

jimin: shut me up

y/n: leave my house

jimin: are you on ur way home?

y/n: how did you even get in??

that is highkey very scary jimin!

jimin: do you not want me or something

y/n: hey i never said that did i?

jimin: well ur acting like you don’t want me :/

guess i’ll just leave then

sighs looks out window….

y/n: aw what a shame guess i’ll have to eat this bread i just picked up by myself….

jimin: hey i like bread….

y/n: no way me too…

jimin: you can make toast with bread…

y/n: that’s true and i make really good toast….

jimin: you do….

y/n: so like do you want to have toast with me….

jimin: wow look at you practically on ur knees BEGGING for me 🙄

y/n: whatever

you’ll be the one on ur knees soon anyways

jimin: is that a threat???

y/n: it’s a promise mr park!

jimin: just say you want my hand in marriage at this point

y/n: lol!!!!!!

jimin: i know you do

deep down

y/n: keep telling urself that!

jimin: she wants you jimin 😍

y/n: fucking freak

jimin: she REALLY wants you

TAEHYUNG -

y/n: you told yoongi we were dating?

taehyung: can’t hear you rn babe

i’m literally drilling holes in the wall

it’s real noisy

y/n: we fuck each other that is it tae i told you this….

taehyung: 🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀 you want me 🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀you need me 🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀 🌀🌀you are my girlfriend 🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀

y/n: stop it

taehyung: you are in love with me

y/n: i am not

taehyung: sorry can’t hear you i’m drilling baby

i told you this already

y/n: drilling does effect your reading ability

taehyung: oh my god the wall dust has gotten into my eyes i can’t see omg someone help me ohhhshuszu

y/n: ur not funny

taehyung: can i come over later 🥺

y/n: can you stop telling people we are an actual couple

taehyung: i love you

y/n: i’m going to drop you

taehyung: in bed?

y/n: should of rejected ur stupid offer when you asked

fwb my ass

taehyung: we have that type of love that it gets just gets so overwhelming in the best way

don’t you agree?

y/n: shut the fuck up

taehyung: you know i like it when you take control

y/n: i’m gonna stop speaking to you taehyung

taehyung: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭baby plz😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

i can’t even breathe without you 🥺

y/n: i mean it tae

taehyung: ok but let me sing for u rq

y/n: no

taehyung: you should let me love youuu

let me be the one tooooo

give you everything you want and neeeeddd

y/n: shut the fuck up

taehyung: i forgot the lyrics hold on

y/n: i am not holding on

taehyung: wait that’s so jack and rose core

i’ll never let go jack 🥺

and then she lets go of him

or does he let go??

idk i forgot

y/n: wish you were jack

taehyung: you into white men???

i’ll be a white man for you

y/n: absolutely not

taehyung: i’ll make you mayo sandwich

think that’s a white person delicacy

y/n: ur getting blocked now

taehyung: ok but we still fucking later???????

y/n: …..

taehyung: ???

y/n: ur so fucking annoying

taehyung: >3<

y/n: 5

don’t be late

taehyung: 🫡

JUNGKOOK -

jungkook: the weather is so nice rn

y/n: do you want to fuck?

jungkook: please 😭

y/n: just say that next time idiot

jungkook: i’m sorry

just wanted to be a gentleman

don’t want to act like just using you for sex or something

y/n: you literally are???

jungkook: not true!!!!!!

y/n: 🤨

jungkook: i’m very upset that you think that

ur worth more to me than just sex ☹️

y/n: since when??

jungkook: since our first date i think

y/n: our first date????

you mean the time you took me to buy a plan b??

jungkook: no the time we had ice cream…

y/n: AFTER you took me to buy a plan b

jungkook: ☹️

y/n: don’t frown at me kookie

jungkook: don’t u like me?

y/n: ofc i like you

i’m fucking you am i not?

jungkook: yeah but

y/n: but?

jungkook: ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

y/n: don’t you understand the concept of friends with benefits?

jungkook: i do ☹️

y/n: so why are you frowning at me?

jungkook: i just thought the benefits would be you falling deeply in love with me and holding my hand sometimes idk….

y/n: kook

jungkook: i’m sorry

y/n: 😐

jungkook: but like…

have you???

fallen in love with me i mean

i mean it’s cool if you haven’t

well not cool

but like cool for you

not really cool for me

but i’ll like cope lol

y/n: sighs

jungkook: changing the subject sorry i’ll cry

but anyways i know i said i wanted to be a gentleman and not act like i just use you for sex or whatever

but i do really need you rn lol

i can come over now right?

cuz i’m on my way lol no joke

i hope that’s ok with you

cuz it’s ok with me

ofc it’s ok with me why did i say that

sorry

but if it’s not ok with you that’s fine

well not fine for me lol

cuz i’m like painfully hard rn

that’s kinda gross

sorry i don’t know why i said that

but it’s ok i can always like

fuck some else

if ur busy or just not in the mood

i get it

don’t worry

y/n: omg you fuck other people?

wow i’m impressed!!!

you go superstar jk!

jungkook: I DON’T I DON’T OH MY GOD I DO NOT

idk why i said that lol

sorry for shouting

um yeah

i don’t

y/n: oh

jungkook: do you??

not that it matters or anything just wondering

y/n: well

jungkook: actually i don’t want to know lol

sorry for cutting you off btw

i didn’t mean it

well i did but like not in a i don’t care what you have to say type of way but in a if you say what i think ur gonna say i’ll throw up and cry and jump off a building

lol

that was a joke lol

LMAOOOO

i won’t do those things actually haha 😭

i am a tough guy

i can handle if you were seeing other people

i can still come over btw right???

y/n: you talk a lot of shit

jungkook: sorry

i’m sorry

i get that

y/n: i like you jungkook

jungkook: yOU DO???

*you do?

sorry caps

oh wow

thanks ha

lol

i like you too

a lot

y/n: i want you

jungkook: OH

ok OK YEAH

that’s cool lol

in what context tho haha

like you want me as in you want me to be ur bf?

you want me to fuck?

you want me to die????

you want me

and this means it’s ok to come over right?

y/n

hello??

you have an incoming call from kook ♡

YOONGI -

yoongi: you free? :3

y/n: i am

yoongi: :3

y/n: idk what that means

yoongi: yes you do

y/n: i don’t

yoongi: stop lying

y/n: never lied in my life

yoongi: ur lying rn

y/n: don’t think so

yoongi: shut up

y/n: that’s mean

yoongi: i’m coming over

y/n: for?

yoongi: y/n

y/n: yoongi

yoongi: stop it

y/n: stop what

yoongi: i’m not saying it

y/n: saying what

yoongi: …

y/n: what u coming over for yoongi :3

yoongi: no

y/n: no?

yoongi: changed my mind

not coming over

y/n: ok

yoongi: ok?

y/n: ok yoongi

yoongi: so u fucking other people now

y/n: woah?????

where did that come from

yoongi: ur fine with me not coming over..

you must be fucking someone else

y/n: jealous much

yoongi: SO YOU ARE?????????????

y/n: don’t shout at me

yoongi: i didn’t shout

y/n: you definitely did!

yoongi: i don’t even care fuck who you want

y/n: ok

yoongi: ok??????????

y/n: yoongi

yoongi: no

y/n: are you mad at me rn?

yoongi: no lol

y/n: wtf did i do to you what the hell

yoongi: who is it

y/n: ????

yoongi: give me a letter

y/n: a letter?

n??

yoongi: NAMJOON???????

yeah just go ahead and block me now

fucking namjoon

ur telling me namjoon better than me

LMAOOOO

y/n: tf are you talking about

yoongi: you and namjoon

y/n: me and namjoon??

yoongi: oh

so ur not..

y/n: i’m not following

yoongi: me or namjoon?

y/n: what

yoongi: you following me or namjoon

y/n: on insta??

twitter???

tf are you taking about

work with me here yoongi

yoongi: i’m drunk

y/n: that makes sense

yoongi: i lied

y/n: i don’t believe you

yoongi: i’m outside

y/n: my house???????

yoongi: no the fucking world trade centre

y/n: the what

yoongi: open ur fucking door

i need to kiss you

SEOKJIN -

jin: IF YOU TOUCH JUNGKOOK ONE MORE TIME IM GONNA THROW UP EVERYWHERE AND RUIN THIS PARTY FOR EVERYONE

y/n: i think he’s so cute tho :c

jin: CUTE?????

he thinks 4x4 is 7 and i heard he never showers

but you see me i know that 4x4 is 24 and i shower regularly

y/n: 4x4 is 16 you idiot

jin: go away

y/n: you look like a loser in the corner by yourself

where ur hoes at seokjin?

jin: my one and only hoe throwing herself all over one of my best friends rn

y/n: no way?

jin: yes way :/

y/n: does she look good doing it tho?

jin: so good actually

i might faint

y/n: why don’t you go talk to her

jin: like i said she’s trying to fuck my best friend rn

y/n: ur no fun

jin: ur a cheater

y/n: i’m single actually

cheating is not a possible thing for me to do rn

jin: ur supposed to be my fwb not jungkooks

y/n: we are not exclusive jin u know this

and anyways sharing is caring!

jin: convinced you’ve lost your mind

y/n: ur wasting my time rn

kookies getting upset i’m not paying attention to him

jin: kookie????

don’t play i’ll throw up rn

watch me

sticking my fingers down my throat as we speak

y/n: no ur not

i can see you yk?

jin: so NOW you’re paying attention to me

y/n: i always have been

how else would i know you’ve been standing in that corner for and hour like the little creep you are

jin: ok it hasn’t been an hour

y/n: ur right

+30 minutes

jin: yeah whatever

you wanna leave rn??

y/n: only if i can bring kookie with

jin: no

y/n: but look at him

jin: he’s pretty ugly

y/n: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

jin: i am not sharing you with anybody

y/n: that’s not ur decision actually

jin: it should be 😒

y/n: you asking me out rn mr kim 🤨?

jin: no

well

unless…..

y/n: me you kookie

one night i promise

jin: 😐

y/n: listen

jin: listening

y/n: one way or another i’m fucking jungkook tn

ur lucky i’m inviting you

jin: SIGHSSS

you ARE a cheater

i’ll let you fuck jk if you go on a date with me

y/n: can you not read??

was gonna fuck him anyways

jin: ok but I’LL join if you go on a date with me

y/n: you were joining regardless

jin: not true!

y/n: very true!

jin: ….

if you knew that why were you begging me?

y/n: had to make you feel special somehow

jin: you say that like i’m not?

y/n: you are

jin: i know

y/n: i’m glad

jin: ur so hot

y/n: thank u kookie just told me that 💓

jin: he doesn’t say it like i say it tho

y/n: you sure?

jin: very

y/n: interesting

jin: are you guys coming to the car or what?

y/n: so eager

jin: you blame me?

got to show jk how a real man fucks

then i got to take my girl on the best date of her life

y/n: your girl?

jin: problem?

y/n: *friend

jin: no!

y/n: ???

you can’t just say no

jin: watch me do it again

no!

y/n: i am NOT ur girl

jin: u right

wife 🥰

y/n: no!

jin: don’t use my shit on me

y/n: watch me do it again

no!

jin: ok whatever

ur opinion on the matter isn’t valid anyways

y/n: ???i think it is

jin: no!

y/n: kill yourself

jin: not really into the whole suicide thing

can you come kill me??

i would prefer you take me out via strangulation

y/n: you me sick

jin: come to the car now i’m boredddd

y/n: i don’t see you moving to the car

jin: i’ll move when you move

y/n: whatever

jin: so excited wifey😋🥰

HOSEOK -