"Dont Leave"
We held each other. I rested my head on their chest, crying, sobbing. I wanted to scream. I wanted to vomit. I wanted to…I didn’t know what I wanted to do.
I wanted to let everything out.
He held me. He stroked my hair, kissed my forehead, told me to let it all out, that everything was going to be okay.
It hurt. It wasn’t going to be okay. I'm not okay.
I shouldn’t be putting this on him, he shouldn't have to sit through this.
I cry even harder at that thought. I want to push away, but at the same time I think if I let go I’ll die. That everything will shatter. That the one person that I actually feel something towards might disappear or leave me.
“Please don't leave me,” I sob. “I love you, I’m sorry.”
He lets out a quiet ‘shh’ and kisses the top of my head as he rubs my back. “It’s okay, don’t be sorry. There’s nothing to be sorry for. I’m not going anywhere.”
I clung to him, gripping his shirt so hard that my knuckles turned white, and I could feel my fingertips digging through the fabric and into my palms.
I kept whispering, “Don't leave, please, don’t go.”
“I love you baby,” he says. He moves us so that we’re laying next to each other, my head buried in his chest as I sniffle. God, I must’ve looked pathetic.
He keeps whispering as he holds me. “I’m not going. I got you. I’m here. It’s gonna be okay, I got you.”
Authors Note: am i jealous of a relationship that I created? Yes, yes I am.
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Sorrowful Love (Two Shot) | Jung Hoseok
"There's no sorrow that lasts forever and there is no love that lasts forever." He says, hands in his pocket looking at the beautiful girl walking beside him.
"I say there is" she replies as their eyes meet.
"Which one love or sorrow?"
"A sorrowful love"
Tags/Warnings :- Angst, heartbreak, mentions of idol!hoseok, breakups, basically emotional PAIN, so y'all please be ready to cry before you start reading it, there might be a part 2, I warned you guys. That's all, ig. Enjoy..? 😆😭
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author A
Word count :- 1.8k Words
Masterlist
CRUSH 'Beautiful'
01:43 ━━━━●───── 4:14
⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻
ılıılıılıılıılıılı
ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮
CHANYEOL 'Stay With Me' (Ft. Punch)
01:43 ━━━━●───── 4:14
⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻
ılıılıılıılıılıılı
ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮
****
|| 𝕾𝖔𝖗𝖗𝖔𝖜𝖋𝖚𝖑 𝕷𝖔𝖛𝖊 ||
(A/N :- BOLD is the journal)
There's no sorrow that lasts forever and there is no love that lasts forever. He was right after all. She writes down on the last page of her journal. The journal she started solely because of the man who was now the cause of the tears that flow down her face.
With a sigh, she turns to the first page, the start of their love. She had written down in the journal is every moment they spent together with passionate feelings, from the first meet to the last which wasn't long before, just a few hours ago. The end of them. The end of everything.
As she stares at the playful picture attached to the hard bound cover of the book, a pained smile makes its way onto her face. Their first date. At an amusement park. Cliché, but beautiful. The photo was funny to say the least, some ice cream on her nose, eyes widened in shock from the embarrassment she had to face, and him beaming at the camera with a smile that reminded her of the cheerful sun.
Yet now, opposed to the bright feelings that the picture portrays, a tear trickles down her cheek, dramatically staining his face on the polaroid.
She opened the book filled with beautiful and precious memories. She flips through the first few pages of the book, turning to a page that held so much meaning to her. It read 16/06/XXXX, it was their prom day. The day when she had told him about her feelings.
Outside the building from where you could hear loud music with people dancing to the beat, stood a girl adorn in a baby blue gown. The moon light reflected on the small gems present on the gown made her glimmer. She fidgeted with the end of her puffed sleeves as she waited for someone.
Someone who means the whole world to her, whom she could have all sorts of interesting conversations with, someone she had always trusted and someone who she was ready to trust all over again.
A series of hurried footsteps approached her, making her turn.
"Hey, everything okay?" Hoseok asked breathing heavily, making Ava aware of the fact that he had run all the way here. She cracked a small smile.
"Yeah, I just have something to say," she says, looking at the sky, avoiding any sort of eye contact.
"Go on then," he replies making his way next to her, hands in his pocket as he also, looked at the night sky.
"I..um.." Ava begins, trying her best not to stutter, her legs shaking as she held the side of her dress.
"I like you," She choked out, turning to the man next to her, only to see him tilt his head still looking at the sky.
"Sure," he simply replied, causing Ava to look at him in pure disbelief.
"What do you mean by 'sure'?" she questioned, her heart beating extremely fast because of the annoying suspense.
"The more I react the more nervous you're going to get." he says, monotonously, not moving an inch, the bright moon light, as if they were in a play, acted like the stop light. They stood in silence with the gentle breeze blowing and making a soft whistling sound.
"Just tell me if it's a yes or no." she pleaded impatiently, waiting for a proper answer.
"Yes," he spoke, still not making eye contact.
"W-what?" Ava said, staring at him with wide eyes. She was not expecting this, since she had prepared herself for a rejection and now, she had no idea how to react.
"I said yes, we should date." he stated, finally looking at her. She noticed the reddish-pink tint on his cheeks, the way his jet black hair was gelled back revealing his forehead. How the moon light illuminated his side profile ever so gently. Even with the intense music in the background, to them it was a silent and peaceful moment as they stared at each other.
The restof the page was just about the extreme bliss and euphoria she felt when shewent to bed later that night, and thought of the surprisingly lovely day she had. Oh! How excited she was to meet him the next day.
Ava flips through a few more pages, refreshing the memories of how cheesy they were. She had penned down ever single thing. Like the one time they winked at each other throughout class or the other time when her friends had forced them to sit together for lunch. A sad chuckle left her lips.
Turning another page, she came to their first proper date at an amusement park.
It had almost been a month now and as a break from their exam preparation, Hoseok had taken her to a nearby amusement park.
Fitted in a pair of mom jeans and a soft yellow top, there sat Ava waiting for Hoseok to get them ice-cream. It was a beautiful, sunny day filled with laughter and screams from the little excited kids that frolicked around the park. She couldn't believe that the day had already come to an end.
The sky was hues of blue and purple. They had stayed this late so that they could have a romantic ride on the Ferris wheel, but since it wasn't running anymore they had come here to get their second round of ice-cream.
"There you go" Hoseok said as he handed her the softie dipped in chocolate, just how she liked it. Sitting beside her, he gets his phone out to click a photo.
"Ava! Look here," Hecalls out for her and clicks a picture causing her to turn with such swiftnessthat a little bit of the ice-cream smudges on her nose making her eyes widen.
"I wasn't ready Hobi!!" She spoke rising her voice slightly, you would expect her to be slightly annoyed right? But nope, instead she had a smile on her face; happy because of the fact that Hobi, her Hobi, was having a good laugh because of something she had done.
The way his eyes closed when he laughed, revealing his hidden dimples. How every time she looked at his smile all she could think of was the sun. The bright laughter filled the air as she also giggled a little.
Another pained smile, another sad chuckle left her lips as she stared at the page, wondering what had happened to them now? Sure they had ended things on a good, hopeful note but that didn't mean she was not sad, or heart broken.
Flipping through another good thirty pages or so, she came to a page that she had written on a few day ago, a weird and curious conversation. Something that she had not thought of so deeply then, a conversation in which she felt proud of her witty reply.
It was beautiful morning. The duo decided to walk to their school together. They kicked the stones on their path whilst holding hands. They talked about anything and everything, be it the birds chirping or how badly they wanted their math teacher to be absent so that they didn't have to give their test.
When the topic of shows came up, they bonded over the one drama she loved with her whole heart, the one with a sad love story, a genre she always enjoyed when she read books or watched series.
"And then he gets shot in front of her, but later towards the end she realizes that she has to move on." Ava finishes with her hand still mid air.
"That's why I say," Hoseok begins.
"There's no sorrow that lasts forever and there is no love that lasts forever." He continued, placing his free hand in his pocket as he looked at the beautiful girl walking beside him.
"I say there is," She replies, as their eyes meet.
"Which one ? Love or sorrow?" He asks, as they near their class.
"A sorrowful love." She replies with a slight shrug, as they enter their class, take their respective seats, and wait for the teacher to begin.
Her eyes water again as she realizes the journal is coming to an end, not wanting to cry anymore she directly skips to the end.
There she stood, in front of her house, the cool evening winds blew through her, causing her to rub hands together in an attempt to warm them up. It was only five in the evening and Hoseok had asked her to meet up in front of her house, saying he had something important to say.
"Hey!" She greeted, making her way towards him.
"Hey" He said, sounding pretty tired.
"What is it?" She got straight to the point knowing he had just got back from practice and that they didn't have much time before he had to go back to the company.
"I want to break up." He said with a straight face, which was in contrast to the confused and hurt expression Ava wore.
"It is a prank right? The others are hiding, aren't they?" She asked. More like tried to convince herself that he was just joking around with her, as the result of his and the boys' dares.
"No, I am serious Ava, but before you say anything, please let me explain." He spoke as both his hands gestured her to wait and let him complete.
"We are going to debut in a few months and I think I will not be able to give you the time and love you deserve. Neither will I be able to focus on performing. This might sound extremely cliché, but when I am fully settled-" She cut him off shaking her head vigorously, teary eyes, runny nose and cheeks cold.
"No, you don't have to come find me, I don't want you to waste your time and energy in finding me, not when I know I will move on and will be living the life I want " she said choking on her tears, as she turned her heels and left without another word or waiting for him to say anything.
She closed the book and looked at the clock. It was ten. Her usual bed time. She set the book on a table and took a quick bath before changing into her saturn pajamas. She turned the lights off and got under the sheets of her soft bed. Closing her eyes she thought
She will get over it. She promised him. She promised herself. She promised that she would live the life she wanted, that she would go after her all her dreams.
Well- not all of her dreams.. sadly, he was no longer something she could go after. Not for now, at least.
♥♥♥♥
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