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#of his insides just being pure energy at first and spilling out the same way you cant stop light shining out of a lightbulb with your hands
vash-in-the-void · 3 months
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More of this wonderful fic by @madnessmadness
In reference to a specific scene in chapter 19 (click for better quality)
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“I come undone as I am properly cycled for the very first time.
It's like priming only it lasts, it's like the vanilla extract but softer, sustained. and it starts as an unfurling between my legs and hitches up my center through my guts into my chest. Like a can opener. Molten. Like microwaved butter poured into my abdominal cavity as my insides fall out my body, all the way out, wide wide wide an unwinding three fold, outward, down, an unnatural drawing out sensation.”
I took some artistic liberties with the whole scene - I got brain blasted by this image while reading and had to put it to screen
More close ups since idk how to export the image in high quality
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twdbegins · 3 years
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Having Sex on a Run with Rick
Rick Grimes x Fem! Reader
Request: Hay, I recently became active on your blog; And I love it so much already!? Your work for Rick? 😤 It’s damn fine! We need more for him,,I was wondering if I could get something for Rick where Reader and him are on a run and Reader feels frisky? Lust comes over the two and they make out, getting each other off? Basically they’re having a quickie on a run? Because the adrenaline is pumping if you get my gist... @positive-squid​
Warnings: Smut. Profanity. Sexual content.
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Rick could tell that something was off with you.
You weren’t acting badly or mean or anything. 
But you seemed...antsy.
At first, he assumed that you were getting a little stir crazy.
Things in Alexandria had been good for a while, and mostly everyone had been sticking around trying to improve camp.
Even though Alexandria was extensive, he could understand how someone could still feel a bit caged in.
So he suggested that you accompany him on a run.
The two of you were close friends, so he didn’t see any issue with it.
He almost felt bad at how excited you got over it.
Rick figured that the group could always use more resources, so he didn’t feel as if this run was just for killing time.
You were bubbly as you slid into the passenger seat, positively stoked to be getting out for a bit.
Rick knew of a few places that needed to be scouted, so at least the two of you could get a day’s work out of this run.
It started as business as usual.
The two of you chatted as you scrounged for food or whatever else you could possibly use.
“Does Carl still need a pair of bigger boots? I think I just found a pair.”
“Sure, thanks. Do you think that Daryl would use this hairbrush?”
“Very funny.”
It was a pretty textbook run. The two of you chatted while you looked for things, throwing anything and everything even semi-useful into your backpacks.
Not to mention...it was brutally hot.
While it was a bit difficult to really ever truly know what day it was...
It was always unmistakable when summer had come back around.
The days were blistering hot and even the evenings were sticky and warm.
Sweat dripped down your back as you navigated the abandoned building that was somehow trapping more heat that you would’ve anticipated.
You had glanced over at Rick at one point to check on him, when you saw that he was having the same problem.
Sweat beaded around his forehead, some of it sliding down his face and neck.
He glistened in the daylight, his hard work being proven through his perspiration.
You couldn’t take your eyes off of him. 
It was the strangest feeling to be so drawn into him.
Sure, you had always found him attractive. It was hard to deny.
But you hadn’t really ever had a chance to just...look at him.
You eyed over his hands and arms as they moved stuff around.
His muscles flexed and relaxed in the most captivating way.
The veins in his hands and forearms were prevalent from both the heat and all the strenuous movement. 
His dark curls were damp with sweat, yet he still looked so clean.
Your sights diverted to his hips, watching the way his legs moved in such a calculated way.
All kinds of dirty thoughts plagued your mind.
The thought of his hands around your throat.
His fingers in your mouth,
His cock buried somewhere deep inside of you.
He looked perfect.
A little too perfect.
It didn’t take him long to catch your stare, a confused smile as a quirked brow appearing on his features.
“Something wrong?”
You snapped out of your trance, embarrassed that he had just caught you staring. 
“Nope!” You had squeaked, “All good here.”
He brushed it off, thinking you were tired from the day’s work.
It wasn’t until you were loading up the vehicle with all of your found resources that he noticed it again.
He noticed the way your eyes followed his every move.
The way you were listening extra closely when he spoke.
Something was on your mind, but he just didn’t expect that he was on your mind.
The two of you climbed into the truck, him in the driver’s seat and you in the passenger’s seat. 
But he didn’t start the truck.
Instead he looked over at you, catching your bashful gaze.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” Rick asked, this time a little more determined to figure it out.
You refused to admit to him that you had been pining over him for the last hour and a half.
Deny, deny, deny.
“Oh, I’m fine. I’m just tired.”
Rick wasn’t buying it.
He wasn’t buying that at all.
“You know, if something is bothering you, you can tell me. I don’t want you to be unhappy if it’s something I can fix.”
Oh, it was definitely something he could fix alright.
But still, there was no way that you were telling him that.
“I really am fine, Rick. Honestly.”
He still wasn’t convinced, but he didn’t want to push you.
He started the truck, thinking that he’d get through to you sooner or later.
The ride was quiet, both of you too caught up in your own thoughts to say much of anything. 
You had tried to push your dirty thoughts aside, trying your hardest to control your feelings towards him.
But the way he looked in the late afternoon sun filtering in through the windows, mixed with the way he kept throwing side glances at you...you couldn’t.
“Pull over.”
“What?”
“Pull over, please.”
Rick obliged, worried that something was wrong.
He barely even managed to get the truck in park before you crawled over the center console into his lap.
He didn’t even have time to be stunned, because your lips crashed into his before he could speak.
It surprised you, but Rick didn’t really question it.
He kissed back with the same energy, fiery and passionately desperate.
His hand came to the back of your neck, keeping you close and allowing your lips to hover over his when you pulled back for air.
He could feel the heat pooling between your legs through his pants, and he knew it wasn’t from the summer heat.
“I never knew you felt so strongly about me.” Rick had chuckled, already breathless from the heavy kissing.
He groaned when you dragged your clothed cunt over his thigh while you worked on getting his pants unbuckled.
He caught you in another kiss while you stroked his cock to an erection, his spine shuddering at the feeling of you touching him like this.
You praised yourself for deciding to wear shorts, getting them off with your free hand and with ease.
You knew you had limited space, since you weren’t too keen on doing this outside of the truck.
Not that you minded being in close quarters with Rick.
This was going to be a quick fuck. 
You knew that this was the scratch the itch and the address the tension that had been building for a while.
Rick didn’t seem to mind that.
His fingers dragged through your folds, collecting your arousal as he rubbed the pads of his fingers on your clit.
You moaned at the feeling, the waves of pleasure already beginning and he hadn’t even gotten inside of you yet.
“You were really happy to be with me, huh?” Rick teased, spitting into his hand and lubricating himself just to be sure he didn’t hurt you.
Before you could respond, your hips were lifted by his hands and he slammed you down onto his cock to the point where your hip bones touched his. 
A synchronized moan fell from your and Rick’s mouths, both of your head lulling back in ecstasy.
Rick wasn’t even moving yet and he was already stretching and filling you perfectly.
Suddenly, Rick was taking charge, which only added to your arousal.
He gave you a second to adjust to his size, letting you wriggle in his lap until you found an angle that was comfortable.
His hand tapped the side of your leg, prompting you to start moving.
You rotated between bouncing on his lap and rolling your hips, making sure that the satisfaction went both ways.
It was intoxicatingly perfect.
The way he felt stretching you and hitting every bundle of nerves possible.
The hot kisses and the heavy touches were everything you had ever dreamed of with Rick.
Your bounces were met by his thrusts, hitting your g-spot in the most flawless way.
You knew it wasn’t going to take long to get off. 
This had been building up for far too long for your climax to be drawn out.
“Fuck, you’re perfect. Feel so good.” He babbled, cheeks flushed and pupils blown.
His head was reeling, and he wasn’t sure that he was totally comprehending what was happening right now.
All he knew is that he didn’t want this to be the first and only time.
His cock throbbed inside of you, his own release begging to be spilled out into you.
You felt the twitch, and that in and of itself is what caused your orgasm to break out all over you.
You came with a squeaky moan, your entire body tensing up around him as your head fell to his shoulder and your hands gripped the back of the seat.
He thrusted a couple more times before he came as well, his release spurting into you and milking his cock white as he groaned out your name.
Your bodies went limp, chests heaving with heavy breaths and post-coital sighs.
His hand rubbed up and down your back slowly, his cum leaking out of you and onto his bare thighs.
A few minutes of silence passed before you raised your head.
Your dilated eyes met his, and what you saw was pure lust and content.
Most importantly, you could see the anticipation through his eyes, all the way to his soul.
You weren’t sure why, but something in your gut told you that this wouldn’t be the last time that you fucked Rick Grimes.
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yanderecandystore · 3 years
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Could you please do a fanfic for a male version of Yandere! Lady Dimitrescu (from Resident Evil Village game) with the reader.
I really like the Resident Evil franchise but I'm too lazy to know what the hell is happening in the older games XD I'm so sorry about that-
I loved watching playthroughs of Resident Evil Village (can't buy the game ;-;), but I felt like it was a bit empty, idk- I felt like the lords weren't really explored enough.
Also the Duke is the best husbando in the whole game- Fight me! >:3
TW/Tags: GN = Gender Neutral, I normally forget to properly name it when it's gender neutral, most of the time I just say "reader" // maybe ooc // lazy genderbent, I'm terrible with names // size difference // servant reader // mentions of gore/cuts/bruises/blood and deaths (and torture- I'm so sorry-) // reader gets hurt // mentions of vomiting
It's Dinner Already [Yandere!M!Dimitrescu x GN!Reader - Short Fanfiction]
It's dinner time already, unfortunately for you, of course.
It feels almost like a routine at this point- Which in a way, it is! You always take care of your tasks during the day, while dreading the inevitable time for dinner to arrive again.
Everyday, at this exact same hour, you and the other servants would prepare a meal for Lord Dimitrescu and his lovely… Sons…
As someone who has started "working" for their family only a month ago, you can positively say: Starving in the cold woods next to your village would have probably been a more merciful death than the ones you have witnessed at this place. You weren't as accustomed to such brutal executions at your village, actually you hardly even witnessed so much death, at least not so up close.
When you came here, you didn't expect to be instantly comforted and treated with respect- You were a commoner looking for an possibility to thrive in a noble's house, you were basically an easy target for any entitled selfish lord to easily belittle you and make you work for them until your hands would turn to dust. Yet nothing could have prepared you for such an odd situation.
Vampires. Monsters. Fiends if you were bold enough to insult them. You weren't exactly welcomed as much as you were snatched in and now forever trapped inside this castle. You can still hear their laughter… Their insane expressions of pure glee, the way they have bursted into maliciously laughing at your pain as you screamed for help trying to open up their door again and be free from that nightmare.
The chase didn't last even a second, they stabbed your legs with their scythes and brought you deeper inside this hellhole, as you cried your eyeballs out. The sons had brought you back inside so their father could take a look at the "intruder".
An absolute titan amongst the mortals. His height was only a sick reminder of how much power he had over the castle, over his sons, and now- Over you.
He may not have been as massive as he was threatening as you remind him to be, but at the time you were just in awe of his height considering you have never seen someone as tall and as mighty.
Then again- You have never seen vampires as well. Were they the same vampires as the books you've read as a kid? You weren't so sure of it…
You were hoping that if you begged for life and for forgiveness for having disturbed their peace, that they could spare you and let you go back to your village. Sadly enough, you commented on how you were only trying to look for a job as a servant.
You probably shouldn't have given them ideas, but it's too late to think about your mistakes now, however.
The sons begged to see your blood spilled, yet Lord Dimitrescu was merciful enough to grant you your "wish", as he said.
It has been a month ever since you were trapped inside and forced to work as a miserable little servant, and even if you didn't suffer the worst forms of punishments that they had in-store for you, you couldn't help but fantasize about just running away and never turning back.
You're so tired of this castle, of the smell of carnage, of the undeserved and over the top punishments, and especially of the people who would subjugate you to such things.
But at last, it's dinner time already, and you can't keep them waiting.
You feel your hands shaking as you walk out of the kitchen and into the dining room where the masters of the castle were so graciously waiting for you. You know what they're waiting for- But you can't let them distract you, for those that commit accidents are faced with fates worse than death.
Although you would rather do this process quickly, you can't afford mistakes to happen, so you take your time to set not only their meal in front of each one but to also pour "wine" into their glasses. You do all of this without looking directly into their eyes, only bowing down to each one and saying "excuse me"s in what they would call a "decent tone", as the smell of their disgusting beverage starts to irritate your nostrils. If you didn't know the main ingredient to Sanguis Virgins is, you probably wouldn't have this immense disgust over it, but right now just the thought of it makes you want to gag.
Only villains could so easily drink blood, and still make a living out of it.
Your internal thoughts of pure hatred against this whole situation almost completely blinded you to the fact that they were eerily, very quiet.
….
On most nights they would be talking with each other while occasionally making comments about you or your presence. Obviously they were all pretty nasty comments that they somehow expected you to back it up in some way or another, it's when they try to insert you into their conversation that makes you hate this occasion so badly, but it normally ends as quickly as it begins.
But as you are pouring wine to Lord's Dimitrescu, you notice that they haven't said a single thing while you were there. You stop what you're doing as you realize that they were silently observing you this whole time, and as you look into their expressions you come to think that maybe you have messed up-
Somehow, in some way or form, you may have messed up- And the fact this mistake could cost your head only agitates your already very worried mind.
….
A small moment of silence continues before the middle son, Cassandro, starts to chuckle in an almost innocent way- As if he was a kid who just said a bad word for the first time- And as he bursts into sudden laughter, Daniel leans towards Bello and loudly whispers:
"- I told you, they do this every time." To which Bello only replied with:
"- It's almost like hypnosis in a way."
The three sons were mesmerized by your ability to trap yourself in your own mind. They're probably aware that you do this as a defensive mechanism but they still find it comical in a weird way. You feel yourself get more tense as you look up at Lord Dimitrescu and see him staring back at you, with an unreadable expression across his face.
Before you could come up with an excuse to whatever you may have caused to disturb their dinner, the Lord himself spoke.
"- How inappropriate. As my sons, you three should know better than to laugh at our servant's airheaded mind-"
And as he said that, their smiles begin to disappear and be replaced with frowns and a bit of shame as they become stiff at their father's words.
"- And how inappropriate of you, too. To be so distracted in the presence of your masters, that's quite rude don't you think?"
But as he continued their bodies begin to relax once again as they realize he wasn't focusing on them- He was focusing on you.
Words have completely disappeared from your vocabulary as you start to think that maybe you won't be able to see another day after their meal is over. You try to mumble some possible responses before getting interrupted by him once again.
"- It's very rude, so very rude in fact that I think we deserve some answers. What were you so distracted about? What were you thinking that could have possibly taken over your small little head?"
Right now, he was sounding a bit condescending, thankfully not as angry as he would have been with the other servants right about now. Every little mistake was used as excuses for punishments- And if you were walking on thin ice before, right now you are one-step closer to breaking this entire lake and getting yourself killed by the freezing temperatures of the water below you.
Thanks to your luck (or maybe lack thereof, depending on how you see this) Daniel came to "your rescue" by coming up with an excuse for you.
"- Maybe they were hungry." He said without any indications of it being a joke or a lie- As the youngest yet craziest of the bunch, he always had that weird "naive yet dangerous" energy coming from him. He was naive enough to make that statement when it's very clear that you actually despise being near them, but he still was a son of Dimitrescu.
You know better than to underestimate any of these people.
The Lord didn't seem completely convinced as he side eyed Daniel who was blissfully eating his meal without acknowledging his dad's glance or his brother's looks of disapproval.
Without a warning you were pulled closer by your wrist and forced into sitting next to the Lord, who made a sign for another servant to bring you your food. This… Doesn't feel right at all, you're waiting for the worst to come yet you don't feel like you can ever prepare yourself enough for what they have in store.
"- M-My Lord- This isn't needed, I'm fine. I'll just continue my duties, if you can excuse me-" You plead, while trying to get up from your chair.
"- Oh but what host would I be if I didn't take better care of my guests? Poor thing, you must be starving if you can barely serve us wine-" And as his tone gets progressively more sarcastic and a bit louder, you can hear his sons snickering from the other side of the table, but you can't see them since you can't take your eyes away from him.
You're worried that if you look away for just one second, that you may not be able to see ever again.
"- It's so sad when one of our guests feels hungry- What's worse is when we are also very, very hungry."
"- Thirsty, even!"
"- Oh, I can feel my throat drying just at the thought of such misery!- Our dinner seems to be ruined."
You hear their whispers, you hear how they are clearly joking about this- How overly dramatic they're being over something so miniscule as you just- Ignoring them.
Let me remind you this is all because you refuse to look them in the eyes, that you refuse to give them any satisfaction for the heinous things they have done! You've seen so many people get hurt inside this castle only for their sick and twisted thirst and entertainment.
"- Indeed, my boys. My appetite is ruined, though dinner is not over yet-" Lord Dimitrescu spoke as he looked at his sons clearly enjoying your inevitable pain, but before he could continue he turns himself to you again, putting a hand on your arm and saying:
"- Wouldn't you agree?" Loud enough so that his sons could hear it, but soft enough to send the tiniest shivers down your spine.
"- …!"
"- No, no- Please, not again!-" He wouldn't dare do this, would he??
But before you could react he had already done it, you barely noticed how fast he had grabbed that knife to slice your wrist- His hand firmly gripping your arm as he made a deep enough cut so that your blood could be easier to access.
It somehow hurts just as badly as the first time his sons have stabbed your ankles and dragged you across the floor- At least you're not bumping into things like before, and even if it's a deep cut it's not as big as it could be if he used his claws to actually do this.
Oh, oh those claws- You almost thought he would use them on you… Those were something else. You can't remember exactly what happened, and why it happened, but you remember seeing him use those on another servant who may have crossed the line at some point.
Well "crossed the line"- More like "casually inconvenienced him". Lord Alcino may act like an incredibly high noble but he acts so childishly and in such an egotistical manner that you are surprised he can even have a castle like this in the first place! You don't remember what the servant has done to be so cruelly dismantled, but you don't doubt that it was for a stupid reason!
You miss that servant actually- Probably the only person who you actually talked with, and the first one to actually taught you how to do your job… You two could have been friends if he didn't intervene.
You briefly remember those moments before getting to experience the most weird sensation of all- Having your bloody cut be licked and sucked on. It hurts and it stings in a way that not only makes you want to cry but to also gag at the thought of you feeding this monster.
You refuse to look at him even in this scenario, you refuse to see him feeding off your blood… Sometimes you wish you were just as poisonous as some species of frogs, poisonous enough to make his mouth burn so he can experience a fraction of the pain he causes to others.
You tried fleeting away, you tried getting up and moving away but his grip on your arm only helped you in getting closer to him- You have your eyes closed as your only option is to cry and muffle your agony.
But as always, he is not satisfied with you just ignoring him. This was supposed to be a lesson, yet you're clearly avoiding your teacher as best as you can- But not today, little flower, you're not getting out of this so easily.
This is the first time he ever got to really taste your blood, as normally you would be behind the other servants while trying to learn how to please him, the only moments where he gets to see you is when it's dinner time, but oh- You're just so cruel!
Escaping inside your own little head while he has to content himself with just your image. Your presence is very much appreciated around this hour, little one-
He has noticed this before, of course, but it was only when he noticed his son's curiosity over the way you behave around them that made him organize this little trap. He didn't have everything planned actually, his plan only involved getting to this moment no matter what- And oh boy, has luck been on his side!
Your blood tastes better than expected of a commoner, your delicate and fearful whines of pain are just as delightful but what really gets him is this tough persona you try to convince everyone you have- You despise him, and it's clear to see why- But he knows his charms will probably work on you one way or the other.
He gripped your face trying to make sure you'll get to him in the eyes as he has a taste of you. Absolutely delicious, especially after you so gracefully "ruined" their dinner.
His sons were just watching as they continued to drink from their crimson glasses. They were just enjoying the show, as everything seems to easily amuse them- Their father was just showcasing how they were so much better than the common folk, and they have no other option but to take notes and to remember what they have to do if they ever feel ignored by the servants in the castle: Show who are the true masters of this place.
None of them were really interested in drinking from you, considering how all three seemed to recognize how their father has taken a liking towards you. No one would dare mess with their father's prey.
If you had enough strength in you, you would start vomiting as soon as this has started, but the more he takes from you the more you feel like you can barely stay conscious.
He wasn't supposed to take so much, at least not so soon- He wanted to just take a sip but he can't deny the fact he would rather drown himself in your blood than to let go.
He sighs, as he notices that you're slowly getting less and less aggressive, getting more and more tired as he drains you from this cut.
You're not unconscious yet, just barely stable enough to understand what's going on.
"- Sigh… Now that was a decent enough meal." He can't praise you for being tasty, can't have you being cocky around him.
"- Here, since I'm done here I'll take you to the servant's living quarters- And because I'm so kind I'll make sure that wound is safely secured and cleaned, so here- Come along now."
And as he stood up he offered you his hand so you could get up yourself, but you don't have enough energy to walk yourself to your room, thankfully you're already ready to go to bed and wish to never wake up again.
And as the nightmare never ends, he decides that if you are going to be difficult then you leave him no choice but to carry you there. How much has he taken from you?? Jesus, he should learn some self-control before doing this again- The absolute brute that he is.
Your vision may be a little screwed over because of the lack of red cells running through your body at the moment- But you have a weird feeling that you two aren't heading towards the servant's living quarters, as you feel like you two are quite literally going in the opposite direction.
Oh but it's fine- Right?
It'll be fine. Surely. After all, he already took what he wanted from you, and he doesn't seem to need more so- You probably won't have to worry about anything right now, dinner time is already over, you can finally relax now….
🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭
So I'm sick again- Sorry y'all, I just have a horrible immune system and I really don't understand what is wrong with me-
I'm sorry if you didn't like this boo :(
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zodiakuroo · 3 years
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Pretty Things Don’t Need To Think
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Kuroo decides he's had enough of his smart, independent girlfriend. He wants her to be his good little housewife instead.
Pairing: Kuroo Tetsurou x Fem!Reader
Contains: 18+ oh boy... dubcon, big dick kuroo, dumbifciation, misogyny, manhandling, oral sex (deepthroating), pee in vee sex, degradation, manipulation, pwp, breath play, mouth spitting, creampie, thigh riding, slapping, spit, porn watching, crybaby reader but kuroo is a meanie so :3
Word count: 4.6k
Notes: my first time writing smut n it’s mindlessly self-indulgent i just had this weirdly specific fantasy that i need to get out byeee
Kuroo loved the fact that you were smart. He loved the fact that you could debate and argue with him for hours on the most obscure topics. He love that you were always interested in his nerdy rambles and he found it adorable that you would sometimes go off on your own nerdy rambles. When he met you, he was so used to fucking brainless bimbos that he was surprised to find a girl that he both wanted to sleep with and have a conversation with. Your intellect was one of the many reasons he wanted to pursue a relationship with you beyond sex. One of the many reasons why he planned on marrying you.
Kuroo also loathed the fact that you were smart. Not loathed exactly. He just hated your stupid fucking degree. He hated the fact that it demanded so much of your time and energy that you sometimes had to put your studies before him. You wanted to be doctor, always wanted to apparently. You wanted it so bad he felt a little ashamed for how much it annoyed him.
But he didn’t understand it. You were going to be the wife of Kuroo Tetsurou, President of the Japan Volleyball Association. Is that not enough of an achievement?
 You didn’t seem to think so.
Now Kuroo’s not a misogynist by any means. If he were, he wouldn’t even let you get this stupid degree. He doesn’t want you to be some mindless Stepford Wife who only cooks and cleans and says “Yes, dear” “No, dear.” Of course he believes in equal rights and all that bullshit but he just doesn’t see any reason for you to work. Financially, there’s no need. More importantly, as his wife you would be too busy taking care of him, his home and his children for you to even thinking about having a job. He would let you get this degree purely for you to soothe your own ego, so you could feel like you’ve accomplished something.
And this is the fucking thanks he gets.
Coming home every day to see you hunched over the dining room table, 4 different textbooks open, papers scattered everywhere. He works hard every day to make a comfortable life for the two of you but asking to come home to a clean apartment and dinner on the stove is too much to ask apparently.
You don’t even register that he’s in the room until he places two large warm hands on your shoulders, causing you to jump, quickly soothed with a kiss to the top of your head.
“Hi baby” he mutters against your scalp, gently massaging your shoulders.
“Hmm. Hi Tetsurou.” you turn your head to look at him, eyes bloodshot and bleary from staring at your computer all day.  “How was your day?”
“Same old.” He places a chaste kiss on your lips. “How’s it going here? Are we winning?” He glances at your notes, Intercranial mass lesions. Subarachnoid Haemorrhage. Spontaneous Intracerebral Haemorrhage. He wonders why you do this to yourself. Pretty things like you shouldn’t have to think.
You groan. “Not at all. This neuro final is gonna kick my ass.”
He chuckles, hands gently massaging your shoulders. “You say that every time and every time you ace it baby.”  Instead of asking you where his dinner is, he asks “Have you eaten today? What do you want for dinner?”
“ I’m not hungry Tetsu. You can order whatever you like.” He clenches his jaw in irritation. You can’t even be bothered to give him your full attention for 10 minutes? The man who works so hard so that you can afford to sit at home and study the whole day?
No.
He’ll get your attention one way or another.
“Angel,” he drops his voice an octave or two, leaning down so his mouth is pressed right against the shell of your ear. “How about you take a break yeah? Wanna help you relax.” He starts to kiss your neck. He hears your breath hitch. He’s got you. “You worked so hard today plus I reaaaaally miss you.”
With that he begins to leave wet kisses on your neck, feeling you melt into him. His hands move away from your shoulders, gently groping at your chest.
You suddenly go rigid. “Tetsu, not right now.” He doesn’t want you to know how pissed he is but he can’t help it, he groans in frustration. “I’m sorry,” you mutter weakly “I really need to get through these last 3 chapters.”
“Yeah right. Got it.” He storms off with a huff. He’s furious. Your little studious shtick has been nothing more than an irritation for him. But this is too far. He hasn’t come in a month, since you started prep for finals. You’ve been too busy to take care of him. You suggested porn and he laughed in your face. Why would he jerk off when you have a perfectly good pussy? Don’t be ridiculous.
“Tetsurou don’t be mad please.”
“Not mad baby. Keep studying. That’s important to you right?” He’s not convincing anyone but you don’t have the time or energy to engage.
You let out a heavy sigh before turning back to your laptop, falling back into studying like the whole interaction never happened. It made him even angrier. How you couldn’t care less about him right now.
“Just gonna watch some TV. That okay with you, love?” He says sounding sickly sweet, almost sarcastic. If you notice, you don’t make any mention of it.
“Mmhm. Just keep it down please.” You don’t even bother to fucking look at him. 
You don’t wanna pay attention to him? You want him to just jerk off? Fine then, have it your way. Kuroo throws himself down on the couch as he rips off his tie with a little more force than necessary.
This is petty.
He makes quick work of the buttons of his dress shirt.
This is childish.
He quickly unbuckles his belt and pulls his slacks down just far enough to take his soft dick out of his boxers.
 This is your fault.
 You pushed him to do this.
He takes his phone and uses his internet browser to take him to the first porn site he can think of. He doesn’t really care about the kind of video so “Busty blonde slut gets destroyed” seems like a good a choice as any. He clicks on the video and sets up his phone to mirror on the TV screen. With the volume about as loud as it can go, he presses play.
The loud exaggerated moans and gagging startle you. Your head shoots up and you see your boyfriend, lidded gaze fixed on the flat screen TV in front of him. He’s panting, letting out little moans. You crane your neck to see what he’s watching and you see on the TV a bleach blonde girl with massive tits being an absolute trooper as she gets facefucked relentlessly.
“Kuroo, what the fuck?” God he hates when you call him by his last name mostly because you only do that when you’re really annoyed at him.
“Hm? What is it baby?” Now it’s his turn to not even glance in your direction. He’s too focused on the way the girl on screen’s throat is bulging as the man thrusts into her mouth. Maybe he should watch porn more often.
“What are you doing?” He can hear the irritation building in your voice. He hears the chair scrape along the hardwood floor as you stand up to get a better look at him. He knows you can see exactly what he’s doing now.
He smirks, turning to look at you for just a split second before his attention is back to being on screen. “Watching ah fuck watching TV”. He starts to stroke himself faster now, knowing you’re watching him. He’s a little embarrassed by how turned on he is. Cock already rock hard, his tip bright red and shiny from leaking so much pre-cum.
“Do you have to do… that… here? I can’t concentrate.” You clench your fists and your sides.
Oh you’re pissed. But this isn’t exactly the reaction he wants from. He’ll make it work though.
“Not my problem babe. Shit.” He takes his free hand down to play with his swollen balls and god, if he weren’t so determined to dump this load inside you he might have come right then and there.
“Kuroo!” You shout. He’s still not looking at you. How could he when the girl on the screen is getting absolutely railed. He only hears the sound of your barefeet on the hardwood floor as you storm over to the couch. He’s not sure what your plan was when you decided to come over here, but it doesn’t even matter anymore because the second you’re close enough he yanks you by your wrist and forces you into his lap.
“Tetsu!” You thrash and struggle in his hold but it’s no use. He’s bigger and stronger than you.
He wraps his arm around your neck, pulling you into a chokehold. “Oh I’m Tetsu now?” he laughs bitterly
“Let me go! Please!” You still haven’t given up getting out of this, tears threatening to spill from your eyes.
“Shut up. I want you to watch this.” He’s forcing you to look at the screen now. “Look at that yeah? Look at how she’s taking that big cock.”
A hard palm strikes you across your cheek. “Stop squirming and watch.”
The blonde woman is bent over a coffee table while the man behind her rams his dick into her without abandon. Kuroo can’t decide if he finds her whining hot or annoying.
“Looks like it feels good huh babe?” His head is buried in the crook of your neck. “Wanna make you feel good like that.” He places a quick kiss to your temple before pulling your t-shirt over your head, your bare chest now exposed to the cool air.
“Tetsu please.”
“Please what baby?”
Please let me go.
But the way he’s hands are gripping at your breasts, pulling and twisting your nipples, you can’t form any words. Only whimpers.
“Please make you feel good? That what you want baby?” He whispers as he slots his thigh between your legs.
“Yeah yeah please Tetsu.”
Kuroo has turned his focus onto your neck. Harsh sucks, leaving bruises and bite marks in his wake. He wants to laugh at how pathetic you are. Just a few minutes ago, you were adamant on ignoring his presence and now you’re writhing in his lap begging you to touch him.
“Really? I thought you needed to study.”
“No no no Tetsu, only need you.” Just a quickie. You’re both pent up. 10… 15 minutes tops. Then you’ll go back to studying. That’s what you tell yourself.
“That’s right baby.” He grips your hips and grinds you down on to his thigh. “I know exactly what you need.” You take your cue from him and begin riding his thigh, neurology notes long forgotten as he goes back to assaulting your neck. The combination of the sensation of your clothed clit rubbing against his thigh and visual stimulation of the explicit content on your TV makes you dizzy with pleasure.
Your movements become frantic. You’re practically humping his leg at this point. He knows you’re close which is why he wraps one arm around your torso, pulling you back into his chest.
“Baby please.” You whine. Oh, you’re really crying now.
“Oh angel, you were gonna come just from that? Just from humping my thigh and watching some other bitch get eaten out? My angel must be so pent up huh?”
You can’t do anything except whimper and nod.
“Mmhm yeah my baby has been working too hard. Thinking too much. You’re too cute for that you know baby.”
You keep nodding, no idea what you’re actually agreeing to, too busy keening at the praise. You keep trying to move your hips but he just tightens his hold.
“It’s okay though baby I know how to take care of you. Your man knows how to turn off that little brain of yours.”
His hand slides into you shorts, fingers pressing on to your clit over the top of your soaked panties. The moan you let out might rival the porn star on screen, who now by the way, is riding the face of her co-star while she sucks his cock.
He slips his other hand into your panties and starts rubbing quick “Yeah that’s it. Feel good babe?” You melt into his chest. “Yes Tetsu! So good!”
Kuroo pushes his long middle finger into your dripping hole. So tight and warm, he has to bite back a moan of his own. A few slow pumps, before he lets his index finger enter you as well. He’s done going slow now, he starts fucking you with his fingers, thumb brushing over your clit every now and then.
You were so close before, it takes almost no effort on Kuroo’s part to get you there again. You throw your head back on to his shoulder, muscles tensing in anticipation of your impending release. “Tets- gonna cum, gonna cu-“ The second you feel the waves of your orgasm crash on to you, Kuroo has his hands off you entirely, reaching for the remote and turning off the explicit movie.
Ruined. He ruined your orgasm.
You open your eyes and you see Kuroo looking every bit the smug bastard and your own teary eyed reflection in the black screen. “Tetsurou… Why? Why would you-“ You can’t even get the sentence out before he delivers a harsh smack to your clit.
“You think you deserve to come?” A large hand wraps tight around your throat as he lets out a humourless laugh. “You’re stupider than I thought.”
“No Tetsu ‘m not stupid” You manage to rasp out but that just makes him squeeze even tighter.
“What was that? I thought I heard a stupid bitch say something.”
You claw at his had trying to get air into your lungs but Kuroo doesn’t budge.
“Please! Sorry! Please!” is all you can manage to get out. Just as you start to see spots, Kuroo lets go.
Airways burning, you sputter out a “thank you” but your boyfriend doesn’t seem to care. “You’re sorry? Show me how fucking sorry you are.” He’s shoves you on to the floor unceremoniously.
While Kuroo removes his slacks and boxers, you try to compose yourself. You know what’s coming but first you need to stop coughing and stop crying. After a minute of deep breathing, you open your eyes and find yourself face to face with Kuroo’s monster cock.
And you’re not exaggerating. The thing is terrifying. Long and girthy, the biggest you’ve ever seen.  He’s unbelievably hard with bulging veins, the tip almost purple with arousal. You’re mesmerised by it. 
Perhaps the only thing scarier than his dick right now is the man attached to it. He’s staring down at you with so much condescension, small smirk playing on his lips. He wraps his hand around his thick base. “You good princess? Get to it.” He tuts.
You place one of your hands on his throbbing member as you tentatively stick out your tongue to lick at his tip where pre-cum is dribbling out. You slowly start to stroke him up and down as you swirl your tongue around the head. Kuroo is being kind, letting you go slow. If you think he’s doing this for your benefit, you’re mistaken. He wants to take his time with this. More importantly, he’s got about a month’s worth of cum stored up in his balls and he wants to make sure that every single drop goes inside your little cunt.
You take what you can fit (just less than half) into your mouth, lips stretched wide around his dick, the head is poking at the back of your throat while your hands work the rest of his shaft. You look up at him with wide, apologetic eyes. He can tell by the way you’re looking at him you want him to know how sorry you are.
It’s cute.
He grabs you by your hair and pulls you off of him. ”Aw baby, that’s it? I thought you were sorry.” 
A mixture of saliva and pre-cum dribbles down your chin. “Tetsu I am sorry. I’m so sorry!” You whimper.
“Yeah?” Kuroo whispers. His grip on your hair tightens as he tilts your head up to look at him. You stare up at your boyfriend, as he bends down to kiss you. Again, it’s surprisingly gentle but is quickly contrasted with the way he uses the other hand to grab your face, squeezing harshly to make you pucker your lips and keep your mouth open.
He smiles down at you, almost lovingly before he puckers his lips as well, letting a fat glob of spit drop from his mouth into yours.
It’s gross. It’s degrading. It’s cruel.
And that’s why you swallow it down almost immediately, without being asked. 
“Good girl” He whispers and gives you a kiss on the nose as a reward. The simple praise shoots straight to your pussy and now you’re greedy for more.
Kuroo leans back and assumes his previous position but this time flexing his elbows and putting his hands behind his head. He’s still wearing his dress shirt, unbuttoned so you can admire his delicious torso. Toned and tanned with the trail of dark hair running all the way to his groin. He looks completely relaxed with his eyes closed and for a moment you find yourself enamored by how stunning he is. How stunning your man is. You want to please him now more than ever. You want him to call you his good girl again. You steady yourself on your knees and prepare for the task at hand
You start off with a few shallow bobs on his cock. Then you take a deep breath through your nose before taking as much of him in your throat as you can. “Holy shit.”  He breathes out. His hips thrust up reflexively while you try to suppress your own reflex, trying to keep him has deep as possible for as long as possible. You’ve had lots of practice deepthroating your boyfriend’s dick but somehow it hasn’t gotten any easier.
You pull off of him but not completely, just enough to open up your airway to let much needed air into your burning lungs. You twist your hands around the exposed part of him. You look up at him and he’s giving you that fond smile again and it makes your heart swell in your chest. It’s all the motivation you need to take him back into your throat. Again you take him as far as you can but there’s still a good inch or so that you can’t take no matter how hard you try.
“Aw baby you need some help?” Kuroo coos from above you. You look up at him with big watery eyes and nod as best you can with his dick lodged in your oesophagus. He lets out a hum. “Anything for my baby.” He places one of his large hands on the back of your head and pushes you down until your nose meets his pelvis.
Your throat muscles are spasming around the impossibly large, impossibly deep intrusion but Kuroo keeps you there, seemingly reveling in your gags. Your drool dribbles from your lips, down his balls on to the black leather of the couch. You try breathing through your nose but you struggle. However, your discomfort is completely eclipsed by Kuroo’s moans and grunts. If it makes him feel good you’ll keep him in there as long as he wants. You’ll let him thrust into your mouth until he comes if he so choses.
Lucky for you, that’s not what he wants tonight.
You pulls you off his dick by once again but slowly this time. He watches the string of drool that connects your lips and drags you away until it snaps. He take his heavy shaft and slaps it against your right cheek. You let out a gasp and a smirk starts to play on his lips. Before you know it he’s smacking and dragging his cock all over your face, covering you in a mixture of your saliva and his pre-cum. “God damn. Prettiest fuckin’ girl in the world right here on her knees for me.” He says as he leans back to admire his handiwork.  “Open” he says. You obey without hesitation and he spits in your mouth again.
You swallow eagerly. “Thank you Tetsuro.” Your throat feels raw but you smile at him, absolutely giddy, nonetheless.
“Get up here, pretty girl.” Kuroo helps you to your feet and shimmy out of your bottoms before guiding you on to his lap so you’re straddling him. Immediately two of his fingers are inside you again, your slick cunt offering no resistance whatsoever. “You know angel, I’m still not sure how sorry you actually are.” He’s scissoring his fingers, stretching out your walls. If he were a different man, he’d thrust into you right now without any prep but he sees how fucked out you already are, there’s no need to punish you any further. His fingers move at a tortuous pace, squelching as he thrusts them in and out of you.
You’re panting. “Anything, I’ll do anything.”
The slow drag of his fingers grazing that spot inside you as he pulls out makes your eyes flutter shut. When you open them again, Kuroo is holding the same fingers in front of your face. Your boyfriend keeps is hazel eyes locked on yours as he sticks out his tongue to lick up the arousal soaking his digits.
“Hmm ‘course you will.” He slaps his fat cockhead on your sensitive clit making you squeal.
He drags his tip from your clit to your dripping slit over and over again getting it nice and wet.
You chant “Tetsu please” like some twisted prayer. You desperately want to make up for your earlier ruined orgasm.
“Wanna see you bounce on my cock, angel.”
You oblige him wordlessly, taking hold of his shaft and lining in him up with your entrance. You slowly lower yourself on to him wincing at the way he stretches you out. The prep was minimal and his fingers are no match for the size of his cock. You have to stop to breathe and blink away tears. You lift up your hips and lower yourself down slowly again, taking a little more of him inside you. You repeat the process a couple more times.
As much as watching your struggle to take his cock strokes his ego, Kuroo is growing bored. It’s time to take matters into his own hands.
Kuroo grips your hips and takes you by surprise as he thrusts up into you, making you take the whole thing. You let out a shrill cry as the tip of his cock nudges at your cervix. A heavy smack lands on your ass. “I said bounce angel.”
“So big Tetsu fuck. So big.” You whine as he pulls you up, before he sheaths his dick fully inside you, making you shriek for a second time.
God you could be such a crybaby sometimes. You were starting to piss him off again.  He pulls out of you completely and says “Turn around.”
“Tetsu no please! Wanna see you.” You pout, your eyes welling up with tears.
Another smack. This time across your face. You reach up to touch the sore skin on your cheek, it feels hot. “Don’t talk back to me you stupid slut.”
You whimper but obey his command. You don’t want Kuroo to be angry at you.
“Now sit on it.” He spanks you another time before gripping your ass and guiding his cock into you until your ass meets his groin.
Playtime is over.
Kuroo slips his hands under your thighs, grabbing the back of your knees and folding your body in half. Now he’s really fucking you. His thrusts are rough, cock knocking against your cervix repeatedly as he sinks himself into your sopping cunt over and over again. The sound of his balls slapping against your ass and the squelching of your dripping pussy make for the lewdest symphony you’ve ever heard. 
“Tetsurou ‘m close. Please” you cry. The way his dick is rubbing against your sweet spot means you won’t last long.
“No.”
Despite his denial, he doesn’t ease up on his thrusts. You’re trying to concentrate on holding back your orgasm but honestly you can’t concentrate on anything except Kuroo pistoning his fat cock in and out of you.
“Look at you.” You see your reflection in the black TV screen. “You see that?” He gives one particularly hard thrust to emphasise his point. “Fucked stupid huh?”
“Yeah Tetsu Yeah.” It’s no mirror but you can see all that you need to. You see your boyfriend using your body like a fleshlight, thrusting up into you at a relentless pace. You see your cunt split open on his cock. You see yourself being completely and utterly owned by him.
“My girl is such a fucking whore huh? My own personal porn star.”
“Need to cum nnggh let me cum please.” You’re teetering so close to the edge and Kuroo’s filthy mouth is not helping your situation in the slightest.
“Why should I let you cum hm? You’re so good when you’re desperate. Think I should keep you like this.”
“Please Tetsu. Please. Wanna be good! Wanna be your good girl Testu! Wanna take care of you! Please.”
He likes the way that sounds.
His good girl. His wife. His. His. His.
“Cum for me angel. Cum. Right now.” He says, lips pressed against your ear.
He doesn’t need to tell you twice. With the way he’s pounding his dick into your tight little pussy you have no choice but to spiral into orgasm. Your pussy spasms around his cock, pulling him deeper inside you. The hot coil in your tummy that’s been building unravels and the bliss hits you so hard you see starts. Kuroo keeps fucking up into you as you cream around him. As you come down, you go limp in his arms. That doesn’t stop him from using you though.
His grip around your thighs tightens and that’s how you know he’s getting close. “You gonna be a good girl for me? You gonna take this fat fucking load? Yeah? Take all of it deep in your cunt?” He growls right into your ear.
“Tetsu gimme pleasepleaseplease” You beg him as you cry from overstimulation, barely able to form the words.
“Take it. Take it. Fuck!” He growls as he shoots his load right into your tight, gooey pussy. You feel his hot cum fill up your womb and the sensation is so overwhelming it makes you go cross-eyed, tongue lolling out of your mouth. He grunts, still rutting into you through his orgasm. When he’s done he pulls out of you, smiling as he watches his cum leak out of your spent hole.
Kuroo loves the fact that you’re smart. But when you’re like this? Absolutely cum drunk, eyes glazed, body covered in bruises and willing to do anything he asks you to? He fucking adores you like this.
“Go take care of dinner princess, then your man is gonna take care of you some more.” He swats you on your ass.
You giggle and let your wobbly legs carry you to the kitchen with your boyfriend’s cum running down between your thighs, thoughts of your upcoming final completely fucked out of your head.
Along with every other thought not revolving around your future husband.
Kuroo reaches for his phone to text his assistant and tell her to cancel all his meetings for tomorrow. He has to go ring shopping.
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"you were missed, you know.” the voice is light, balancing on the edge of airy like a coin on its rim, in a way only careful practice yielded. so jason whirls around, faster than he normally would in a neatly-pressed suit and loose dress shoes. 
there’s a woman, close cropped red hair swinging into her face and pulling at the corners of her mouth until her expression is as severe as her form. there’s a scar on her jaw and, oh, the memory tumbles into his head as if pushed. kate kane, proof that vigilantism is genetic, once tugged jason into into her side and pulled him away from a particularly leering investor at function. the bite of her nails on his skin was a thousand times sweeter than the man’s smile.
she smirks. “hi.”
“haven’t seen you in a while,” jason responds, attempting casual and instead tripping, falling into his crime lord persona, since he doesn’t know how else to interact with people when he’s jason peter todd-wayne. 
“not since you died,” kate remarks and damn, right for the gullet. “you’ve grown up.”
jason shrugs, suddenly feeling thirteen years old again, suddenly feeling all of four feet, eight inches in the face of her candidness. “time’s funny like that.”
she eyes him carefully, trying to fish for the truth in what she believes is a lie wrapped in a careful quip. jason doesn’t blame her: he’s cultivated quite a reputation for himself. but he stripped the sarcasm from his words before he spoke them, and their rawness is shrouded in the bubbling champagne and crystal chandelier around them, but it’s no less present for anyone who knows how to peel the veil back.
“you were missed,” she repeats, satisfied with his answer. “not sure anyone’s told you that since you’ve come back. your family’s a stubborn bunch. i just wanted to make sure.”
“make sure i knew i was missed?” jason clarifies, feeling a little foolish, because dick wouldn’t beg to save his life but there were a few times that his words came close to pleas, and tim had made it clear how much he’d upheld the pedestal he’d put jason on, and alfred had actually told him that to his face. 
but this was the first time he found himself truly believing those familiar words. he hadn’t known kate, not at all. and yet, she nodded, clapped him on the shoulder once, twice, then left, completely unaware of the pit of resentment she’d carved out of jason’s stomach and thrown on the ground until jason felt like he’d slip on it if he moved, if he breathed.
she didn’t look back, but jason’s eyes didn’t stop following her until she was out of sight.
*
"you were missed, you know.” jason doesn’t startle, his training is etched into every scar decorating his skin, and there are times that he grips and holds onto those scars like a lifeline. he’s far too practiced to flinch, but he’d be lying to himself if his heart didn’t skip a beat.
he forgave himself in the next second, though. cassandra cain could make men much more experienced than him recoil. she appeared soundlessly, and folded down beside him with a grace that jason hadn’t seen anywhere outside his family. the amount of space she left between them, the relaxed posture that left visible tension cording through her arms like pulling steel taffy, the tilt to her body that made jason automatically want to open his mouth and let his tumultuous thoughts come out as an oil spill: right now, cass had dick grayson’s brushtrokes all over her.
“dick put you up to this?” 
cass shook her head, then bit her lip in a considering movement. jason wondered if he’d practiced, because bruce had long since broken that dangerous habit out of his children. 
“i am still working on comfort. assurance,”  she said, rifling through the words like flash cards, picking the most accurate ones. “i thought i’d practice.”
“oh? and why exactly do you think i need comfort.”
“i overheard your argument,” she admitted, “with bruce.”
“i didn’t think anyone was there.”
“i didn’t mean to,” she said. “sorry. but i heard what you said.”
jason scoffed. “prove me wrong. one step forward, two steps back with that dense motherfucker.”
“sign of protection,” cass said. “not distrust.”
out of everyone to say that to him, cass was probably the least likely. jason had thought she, of all people, would be on his side after he found the microchip in his helmet. she, of all people, would value independence after being owned for so long.
“by the time he found you, you were dead. and he missed you more than anything. he will never let that happen again.”
“oh yeah? privacy mean nothing to him? i know he’s crazy about this stuff but come on. there’s a limit.”
“you are not relying on him because of this.” cass stood up, stretching her back, though jason was sure she really didn’t have to. “he is relying on you. let him.”
*
“you were missed, you know.” 
“what, speaking from personal experience? i ain’t you, west.” jason could feel the gentle thrum of electricity behind him, making his hair stand on edge. two steps backward, and he’d be pulled into that void, that black hole of energy, that swirling vortex of pure power condensed into something human-shaped.
except he wouldn’t. it was just wally. just dick’s best friend joining him outside on the balcony. jason didn’t know how dick and tim could stand to be around speedsters willingly, for fun.
“i mean, sort of,” wally shrugged. “but me and you had very different experiences.”
“yeah, west, i’m not sure who else has been stuck in the fucking speedforce.”
wally snorted, an if only you knew hidden in plain sight. jason decided he really didn’t want to know. “i mean there’s that,” the speedster concedes, “but also, everyone forgot i existed. that didn’t happen with you.”
“you sure about that?” 
“hey,” wally eyed him, his eyes suddenly sharp. “don’t start that shit. i was erased from the memories of everyone i loved. you did nothing but stay in the memories of your family.”
“now i know we’re talking about two different things.”
“jason,” wally sighed, and the sheer exasperation pouring off him made jason want curl his fingers, bring them up for a swing, taste the bite of pain that would prick at his knuckles, nevermind the fact that wally would dodge anyway. “don’t do that.”
he turned to face the speedster, arms crossed deliberately over his chest. “where the hell do you get off acting like dick?”
“you’re more like dick than you realize,” wally said, “and i spent half my childhood dealing with his moods. actually, i still do.”
“do you have a point?” jason snapped, starting to get irritated. he wasn’t sure why. he’d spent his entire life one one end of a scale, dick grayson on the other. he’d always tipped his end down. this was the first time someone was telling him the scale was even.
“just because your family didn’t mourn the way you wanted them to,” wally said, “doesn’t mean they didn’t mourn you.”
“fuck you.”
“they loved you. and they missed you,” wally continues, steamrolling right over jason in a way most speedsters were prone to do. “there’s no minimum requirement for loss. no ‘if you didn’t do this, then you didn’t grieve me.’ that’s not even a situation, ever.”
“so that makes everything bruce did okay?” jason sputtered
“not at all. god knows i disagree with bruce on more things than i tolerate. but this is one thing you can’t fault him on.”
it wasn’t that easy, though. jason wanted to scream it at wally’s face, it wasn’t that easy. it wasn’t about whether bruce loved him enough,,,,except maybe it was. jason wanted bruce to have loved him enough to make a difference in gotham. jason wanted bruce to have missed him enough to change things, because change meant that bruce had been so hurt by his death that he refused to let it happen to anyone else again.
bruce had made a vow after his parents died. the fifteen year old inside jason was begging bruce why he hadn’t been afforded the same devotion. jason was his son.
“just something to think about,” wally said, then stepped backward, making to go inside where dick was calling him. “you were afforded the luxury of coming back with a place left empty in your family for you. you didn’t have to make it, like i did.”
“being dead, then coming back wrong isn’t a fucking luxury,” jason snarled.
with a shrug, wally turned, a little faster than the average human, lightning sparking at his heels as he left jason alone on the balcony. “depends on your definition of wrong.”
jason get therapy. please. also happy deathday
honestly i couldn’t decide whose side of the argument i was on, jason’s or wally’s.
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badgirlcovenrep · 3 years
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The Goddess' Blessing (of a daughter)
Chapter One
(NOTES: the raylla adopts Tiffany fic everyone's been asking for
this is going on AO3 once I get home from my sister's but I wanted to post here first. If you'd rather read it there follow me and I'll post once it's officially in there.
Obs: Tiffany is six in this. Mostly because I wanted to write our witch moms carrying their baby and canonically she's like ten so..... and she's also like severely traumatized. We'll get to the healing soon enough though.
+ Edwin is the best papa. And Scylla has p much already adopted this kid, she just doesn't know it yet.
It's half past six p.m when their train screeches to a halt at the Chippewa station. In all the chaos of the last couple of weeks, Scylla hadn't realized Yule was well on it's way. It is still mid November, but the station has been prematurely decked in civilian Christmas decorations, and almost every wall and corner twinkles in golden speckles and fake pine.
Tiffany had been dozing in and out of sleep on the bench next to her, holding tight to her stuffed parrot as well as Scylla's coat sleeve with her restless small hands that spasmed in pure energy even as she slept. Since coming back from Nicte's mission, Scylla had been in a frenzy to get everything ready for their trip, and Tiffany had followed her around the (no longer safe) safe house, clinging on to her attention with wide blue eyes. She'd always liked kids. Before everything happened Scylla even used to babysit for dodger families.
It was never a lot of money, but she appreciated the levity and humor kids carried. They had hope Scylla prayed she could one day get back. Hope that could only come from the fleeting innocence of childhood. But even then, Tiffany was special, she still had all those wonderful, bright things, and she carried them in bulk, spilling out of her tiny little hands for anyone to see.
Yet she was also touched by things so horrible Scylla sometimes shuddered awake in the dead of night, when her mind conjured up terrible nightmares of being in her place. Of being squeezed into a tiny cage, fed dog food, strung up on a stage as masked psychopaths snickered and passed around stones bigger than fists. It showed, sometimes, in how every once in a while her expression became somber and reserved. How she stopped mid-sentence, and Scylla could see the glint of tears in the corners of her eyes.
It reminded her of Raelle - Raelle, who'd sat in her bed just yesterday and snacked on the stupid expensive popcorn her mother had bought - Raelle, who also carried so much darkness behind her strong, steady demeanor - those were the parts of her Scylla couldn't help but want to protect, and as a result, those feelings also extended to Tiffany. Scylla lost a lot of people in her life, and she'd decided the day she found the child's parents that she would do whatever it took to keep her safe. Just like she wished someone might have done for her. Because that sort of hidden, desolate pain could just as well transform itself into something entirely awful if exploited the right way.
People around her start getting up from their seats, reaching to the compartments for their luggage, there aren't many of them making their way up North this time of year but they still fill the cart in humming conversations, deciding on what to do next or where to get dinner. Scylla takes this as her cue to skim her fingers through Tiffany's hair, gently nudging her awake, "Hey, T, wake up, we're here."
The little girl sits up, bleary eyed, and yawns, looking around at the commotion, "it's already Christmas?" She asks, catching a glimpse of the boisterous decorations set up outside.
"Not yet, no." Scylla chuckles, getting up from her seat to retrieve their own bags - they had everything the two could think to bring, and yet were still not much. A duffel bag for Scylla and purple backpack for Tiffany, with unicorn stickers and colorful buttons sewn to the front. Scylla had retrieved it, along with some toys and clothes, from the girl's home, "People just love decorating early."
"Oh." Tiffany quips, as Scylla helps her fit her arms into the straps of her backpack, then takes her hand in a steady grip once they are done, pulling the young girl towards the door to leave the train, "The lights are pretty!" She exclaims happily, blinking in wide eyed wonder.
Outside, November has definitely made itself known, and Scylla is glad they are both warm in their coats as the wind bites her cheeks until they turn a dark blush. She looks around for Edwin, not sure she'll recognize him from the pictures she'd seen Willa scatter around the house, but still willing to try.
For a second, in that moment, she thinks this might not have been a good idea. When Scylla agreed to it, she'd admittedly not been in her full faculties, brain too preoccupied with seeing Raelle again after so long to completely comprehend what she'd been offered.
After everything that happened, she can't help but be a little nervous to meet the father of her ex (?), the same girl she still very much loved. The girl who had run back to her in that dark forest a day before and clung onto her face until all they could breathe was each other.
If she thought too much about it, Scylla could still feel the soft, almost painful impact of her lips as Raelle knocked her off her balance and breathed fire into her chest like molten lava. It'd been so long, she almost forgot the kind of power Raelle had when she kissed. Like she was always on the verge of tasting your very soul. Their whole day back together before was so very delicate and tentative, air fizzling with electricity like the tension of a bow, pulled tight with an arrow ready to shoot.
The time they've been separated her heart was squeezed tight under an elastic band. Whenever she stopped to think, even for a minute, she could feel it taught, so very strained, reaching from the very inside of her ribs. It was there from the very start. The tightness was what propelled her diaphragm into breathing Raelle in that very first night they spent together, even if she knew she shouldn't, and then, it was what kept them orbiting around each other like their very own solar system. Never too far apart. Always wishing to be closer.
When they kissed in the clearing, hairs messy with the wild strumming of the bat just a few feet away, for the first time, she felt like the band released. The invisible string, so very tight, loosening from under her heart to extend around the both of them and wrap them in what Scylla could only describe as exhilarating, shaking relief. The touch of Raelle's cotton gloves, that she never thought she'd feel again - the taste of her lips, like blood and rain droplets and a mouthful of just her.
It left Scylla running on a high since she walked away from Raelle just the day before, in the early hours of the morning.
It's not how she hoped she'd meet Raelle's dad. Deep down, no matter how much she tried not to, Scylla had imagined herself, more than once, coming to the Cession hand in hand with the blonde fixer. In love and together, going home to meet the parents. It's bittersweet to be here with Tiffany instead, and she has to squeeze the young witch's hand slightly to ground herself from the urge to run.
To just take the child's small body in her arms and run- leave the station in lieu of a cheap motel, one with vending machines, where they could hide from the world a little longer.
When the witch looks down, however, Tiffany smiles reassuringly back at her, squeezing her hand slightly in return, and Scylla can't help the wave of affection that washes over her.
"Excuse me? Are you Scylla and Tiffany?" A voice coming from behind wakes them back from the moment, and when they turn, both come face to face with Edwin Collar.
Scylla's sure it's him. If not because he does still look quite a lot like the pictures she's seen, then because the necromancer can definitely see the telltale signs of Raelle written all over his face. It's mostly there in the kind drop of his eyelids, and the way his mouth creates tiny wrinkles of soft skin when he smiles, but it's there, nonetheless.
"Yes, we are, nice to meet you, Mr. Collar." Scylla greets, settling down her bag to shake his hand.
"Of course, it's amazing to finally meet you. Raelle talked you up a storm," he declares, chuckling proudly, "only good things, I assure."
"Oh, I'm sure I don't deserve that." She let's out, hoping it sounded more playful than it feels for her.
"Nonsense. You seem like a kind girl." The man decides, with a solemn nod, before turning to Tiffany, "and you- Tiffany, I'm very happy to have you with me this week as well, I'm sure we'll have lots of fun together."
"Thank you, Mr. Collar." The small blonde replies, half-hiding herself behind Scylla's pant leg.
"Let's go then. It's getting cold." Edwin finally declares, taking Scylla's bag from the floor without a question. The girl goes to complain, but he cuts her off before she can - "and don't fight me on this. Raelle also never let's me carry her bags, for once I'd love to help."
Scylla still wants to protest. Mostly because she feels that they have already asked so much - and she doesn't quite deserve the kindness - but he seems sincere, so she nods instead, and with the affirmative, all three begin their way to the parking lot.
"Is Raelle your friend?" Tiffany asks innocently, skipping happily over her boots.
"Uh- she- yeah, I guess you could say that."
"Well, you said we were going to a friend's dad's house." Tiffany notes. "Where is Raelle then?"
"About that-" Edwin stops in his step, "did you see her? How is she?" He asks, an uneasy tension settling over his demeanor as he studies Scylla for answers, "they told me she was alive but that was it-"
"She's okay. I saw her yesterday, she was well." The brunette assures, and that seems to send a wave of relief over the man, who breathes deeply before continuing their walk along the various cars.
"Oh, thank goodness." He sighs, "when those people took her I thought- I'm so glad she's okay."
"Yeah. We were all worried." Scylla declares. And this, she can relate to. The way he cares so much for Raelle, it spills into the very movement of his expressions. It's familiar, and it warms her heart. She decides right then that she likes Edwin.
"Did the bad people take Raelle too?" Tiffany questions, frowning in scared surprise as they reach Edwin's old truck.
Scylla sighs, not having revealed much of the mission she'd gone on the day before. She knew it'd be scary for her. Tiffany was still very much traumatized, and rightfully so, after everything she'd been through. But Tiffany was also very smart- and observant. She'd catch up eventually and Scylla feels stupid for not dealing with this before coming.
"Yeah. They tried to hurt her, but me and her other friends didn't let them." The necromancer assures, as she helps the girl into the backseat and clicks in her seatbelt, "she's okay now. We're all safe here."
"Oh- Okay." Tiffany nods, but Scylla can see the doubt shining under her eyes.
Scylla wishes she knew what to say, but words fail her, so she squeezes the girl's hand reassuringly once more, winking in what she hopes is humorous solidarity, before closing the door.
***
Raelle's house is just like she imagines- small, rustic - surrounded by a thick canopy of trees and bushes. It reminds her of the places she used to stay with her parents, scattered over random cities all over the U.S. Scylla likes it.
"It isn't much, but we always have warm dinner and pancakes in the morning." Edwin quips, humbly, as he leads the pair of witches to Raelle's room, "you can stay here. Hope it is comfortable."
"This is more than enough, Edwin." Scylla smiles gratefully, "it's too much, really. Thank you for letting us stay."
"Nonsense." He waves his hand with a half embarrassed chuckle, "It's good to have people here again. After Rae and Tally left everything feels a lot quieter." Scylla nods in agreement, as the man turns to leave the room, the two witches inside watching him carefully, "You guys should change and rest a bit- I'll call you for dinner.
Scylla thanks him, and waits until the door clicks behind his back to turn her attention to the luggage that had been settled over a random chair. The room is filled with so much Raelle, she can't help but notice the letters, pictures, memories and song lyrics, glued to every single wall, from a time before Fort Salem, before them.
The blonde used to leave notes on her dorm walls back at Fort Salem. Lots of silly things like "I'll be back after training" or "You fight people in your sleep. It's cute.". Scylla wonders if they are still there or if they've been taken by the army when she was captured. It doesn't matter anymore, the necro realizes, and she shakes her head in an effort to bring her attention back to the room.
"You should put on some pajamas." Scylla says toward Tiffany, who sat, grievously quiet, at Raelle's bed.
She looked thoughtful, in a way regular six year olds don't quite show unless they have to go through way too much. Her small, bright eyes hide barely concealed darkness as she shifts her looks everywhere but at the older witch.
Scylla sighs, finding this place - this relationship - so very painfully familiar. She'd been the scared little girl last time, feeling so very small and alone. And now, as the adult, she was definitely going to try her best not to fuck it. As difficult as it might be. The world didn't need another suffering witch.
After a few minutes of silence, Scylla realizes she was not going to get an answer, so she opens the girl's backpack and fishes out a pair of mermaid themed leggings and t-shirt, along with the small bag that carried her tooth and hair brushes along with some other toiletries. Scylla places the items by Tiffany on the mattress, kneeling in front of the young witch and studying her clear, soft little face.
"Hey. Are you feeling alright?"
"Are the bad men coming here to hurt us?" Tiffany asks, instead of a response, and Scylla frowns in worry.
"No, of course no-"
"They came and took Raelle too." Tiffany notices, tears escaping from her eyelids that Scylla dries up with her thumb, "and they hurt Miss Willa, the other kids' at the office and my mommy and daddy. What if they come here again? What if they really hurt us this time?" As the questions stumble out of her mouth, sobs begin to wreck across her throat until she's shaking, ever so slightly, with the force of her tears and heavy, panicked breathing.
Scylla sighs and rises from the ground to cuddle the girl close to her chest, squeezing tight until she can feel Tiffany's little arms squeeze her back. Scylla's afraid too - most of the time, if she allowed herself to be honest - Ever since watching Raelle leave her in that cell the year before, the girl could feel even more perfectly the path of death and destruction that marked their (the witches') way through the world.
One of the bad things about being a necro - Death didn't like not being known, and it showed itself insistently, to anyone able to notice.
"We don't know whether or not they'll come again." Scylla ends up responding, sincerely, as she squeezes her arms even tighter around the little girl, "but I won't let them hurt you, you hear me? I dealt with them before, I can deal with them again."
"No" Tiffany shakes her head, frowning up at her in teary-eyed fear, "You too. You're safe too. I don't want you to get hurt either."
"Hey." Scylla forces out a chuckle, trying to lighten up the situation for the young witch's sake, "don't be silly, ok? I'm pretty much invincible."
Tiffany doesn't laugh, her breathing having somewhat returned to normal. The girl just stares back at Scylla with a seriousness that's all too unfair, coming from a six year old, and she reaches out, her pinky finger lifted in expectation, "Pinky promise you'll be safe too? Please?"
Scylla knows she shouldn't. The truth is, she doesn't know what will happen. After their plan to capture Nicte was said and done, Scylla barely had any idea what she would be doing now. But Tiffany obviously needs the reassurance, from the way she stares ever so desperately at the necro's face.
"Okay, I pinky promise." Scylla smiles, trying to convey some calm toward the other girl as she let her pinky link with the smaller one. It seems to work, as Tiffany's expression softens and her tense posture falls, "now let's get you under a shower and into some pajamas, ok? You're a very smelly little witch right now."
"Am not!" Tiffany replies, and Scylla can't help but full on laugh this time, pulling the small girl to Raelle's bathroom as she mockingly protests.
Second chapter is almost done, just needs to be read over for mistakes. For C2, Raelle calls home, Scylla meets old dodger friends and she also has an important conversation with Edwin.
Hope you guys enjoyed!
123 notes · View notes
detectivehannibal · 3 years
Text
Desk Dreams
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Hannibal Lecter x Fem. Reader
Warnings: Smut...lol have fun.
A/N: Testing my smut writing skills I see...I tried to weasel Will into this, but I’d hardly consider this a Will oneshot. I struggled so hard with this smh.
Requested by: @no-homo-hank
Prompt: also.. if i may request something sm*tty. personally i think your writing is so good. soo maybe something in his office yk yk like if the reader has a *sexy* dream about him,, and she has to tell him,, idk idk and only if you’re comfortable with it ofc! thanks :)
Word Count: 1,697
“Is it so wrong to change things up a little?”
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You couldn’t get it out of your head. The images, the sounds, the touches, the smells. You had tried to shake it off all morning. You had brewed an extra strong cup of coffee hoping to rid your conscious of the less than appropriate dream from the night before, but to no avail. You never really had dreams, and you especially didn’t have such scandalous ones. On top of that, you definitely never had sex dreams about your therapist. 
Sure, you found him attractive in more ways than just his striking intelligence. However, the thought of anything that wasn’t purely professional had never crossed your mind. You knew what Hannibal thought about dreams. He had mentioned to you before that they are often a crucial tell-tale of a person’s mental state most of the time. That was the part you couldn’t figure out.
What did having such a racy dream mean for you?
You pondered the thought on your way to your session. You desperately wished that you didn’t have to go today, but you knew you’d be questioned about it next session if you canceled. You entered his office’s waiting room, there were no other patients at that time. You weren’t surprised, considering most people tried to push for the afternoon appointments. You took your normal seat, knowing that Dr. Lecter and Will Graham would be finished shortly. Will Graham’s appointments were always before yours, and you always noted how Will always looked as if his brain had been completely picked apart when he exited.
You often wondered what sort of things they talked about.
Sure enough, the door opened a few minutes later, Hannibal seeing Will out of his office. 
“I will see you soon, Will.” Hannibal said to Will, who had pretty much already ended the conversation. 
Will spotted you waiting and actually offered a smile. He didn’t know you outside of the waiting room, but well enough to know your name and speak to you.
“Hello, [Y/N],” He greeted, leaning in slightly; “He’s acting strangely today.” He whispered.
You gave him a confused look, but returned the greeting before he dashed off and out of the building. What did he mean by “acting strangely”? There was only one way to find out. 
“[Y/N], are you ready?” Hannibal asked, inviting you into his office.
You nodded, entering swiftly. When you passed by him, a familiar scent enriched your nose. The smell of his cologne was exquisite and suddenly sparked your memory of the dream from the night before. So that was what you smelled in the dream. You had never paid attention to it before. 
Speaking of the dream, it was suddenly all you could think about. You sat in one of his chairs, immediately striking Hannibal as out of character. He decided to hold off on mentioning it yet. 
“Good morning. How are you?” He asked, sitting in the chair in front of you.
Your leg bounced anxiously as you found yourself in a trance, raking over his features. Had his hair always been so nice? Were his eyes always so enticing? You caught his gaze, waiting for you to give an answer.
“Huh? Oh! I’m doing well.” You said, beginning to feel a heat creep over your cheeks.
His hand briefly went up to his collar to readjust his tie. You basically stopped yourself from salivating. His hands were...so perfect. 
“You’re nervous.” He announced.
You denied. You denied hard. You would not let him through to you today. You’d die of embarrassment.
“Nope. Not nervous,” You said, visibly nervous; “What makes you say that?”
His expression was calculating. He was soaking you up like a sponge to sink water, taking everything in to be squeezed out again.
“For starters, you’re sitting. You usually walk around during our sessions,” He noted; “Secondly, your entire demeanor is tense.” 
Your leg stopped bouncing and you slowly stood from your chair, you began to try and walk as you normally did, but it ended up being more of a pace. 
“Is it so wrong to change things up a little?” You asked as casually as possible.
He looked so good in that light blue shirt. 
“No, but there’s always a reason for such change.” He bantered.
You shot him a look. It was hard to get anything past him. 
“I just...” You tried to come up with an excuse, but turned up short. 
He waited patiently, his gaze never leaving yours. You sighed in defeat. 
“Dreams are normal, right?” You asked, preparing to bite the bullet.
He nodded simply.
“Certainly.” 
You chewed your lip in thought, careful with how you approached this. You fiddled with the hem of your sweater.
“I had a rather interesting dream last night,” You confessed; “It wasn’t anything I had ever experienced.”
He was listening intently, not quite following what you were getting at.
“What did you dream about?” He prompted.
You felt a sudden rise in your throat. This was painful to admit.
“Well, you were in me- uh, I mean...in it.” You said, mentally cursing at yourself for your embarrassing slip up.
A wave of realization was clear on his face as he connected the dots. You wanted nothing more than to crawl in a hole and die.
“[Y/N], I can assure you that sexual fantasy dreams are quite normal.” He said in an attempt to comfort you.
You groaned miserably, burying your face in your hands. You were humiliated. You’d have to request a different therapist. Maybe even seek out a totally different counseling practice.
“Dreams often must be explored to be understood. Tell me more about the content of this dream.” He requested calmly.
Your blood went hot. What? Why did he want to know that? You looked to him, surprised to see that he was completely serious. You rubbed your palms together nervously.
“I came in for my usual session. The energy was different. You were looking at me in a way you don’t usually,” You explained; “The conversation took a turn and...we had sex.”
His expression remained unchanged, but you weren’t close enough yet to see the fire in his eyes. He stood from his seat and took slow strides over towards you. You were sure he could hear your thumping heart.
“How was I looking at you?” He questioned, his voice thick and smooth.
That’s when you saw the riled up glaze in his eyes. A sudden wave of emotion and arousal crashed over you. This was really going to happen.
“Just like you are now.” You breathed out.
Instantly, his lips were on yours. Passionate and needy, but steady and calculated too. His hands gripped your waist, pushing you towards his desk. He shimmied you onto the cool, dark wood and allowed you to remove his suit blazer. 
Your mind was racing, but your movements were faster. You untucked his dress shirt from his pants while his fingertips worked on unbuttoning your jeans. It was a hot, heavy silence as the two of you stripped down enough to get the job done. His mouth was hot on your neck once your pants were casted aside, sucking a hickey on your most sensitive spot. 
“Dr. Lecter, I...” You trailed off, your mind too clouded with pleasure to offer any kind of sentence.
This felt so wrong, but so right at the same time. You were thankful for patient-doctor confidentiality. 
“Hannibal.” He corrected, unbuckling his belt and getting his pants down to his ankles.
Woah. First name basis. That was new. Hannibal really seemed to know his way around a woman. You found that rather shocking.
“Is this your means of dream exploration?” You joked, giving a breathy laugh.
“Something like that.” He replied.
He pulled himself from his boxers, stroking a few times before gingerly pushing himself inside of you. A synchronized moan drew from the both of you as he pushed through your walls, traveling as deep as he could go. He pushed your back down onto the desk, watching you sprawl out desperately for him.
He began with slow thrusts to allow you to adjust to his length, but hit the sweetest of spots each time he went back in. He grasped one of your legs, wrapping it around his waist so he could get a better angle. He had one hand on your throat, wrapped firmly but not uncomfortably. 
“Hannibal, please. Faster.” You begged, your tone coming out as a whine.
He hummed in response, his pace beginning to pick up. Your hands gripped the edge of the desk as the sounds of skin and rattling desk objects echoed in your ears. He admired the way your eyes glassed over in pleasure, his own forehead beginning to break out into a sweat. 
“Was this how your dream played out?” He asked, the slightest bit of strain in his voice; “On my desk...in the middle of a session.”
You nodded in response, but that wasn’t enough.
“Use your words.” He ordered, slamming back into you again.
“Yes.” You groaned out.
“Good girl.” He praised, moving his pace even faster.
This wasn’t how he’d usually pleasure a woman. He preferred something a little more timed out and slow, but you needed something spontaneous and fast. He could feel it radiating off of you. Your mind bounced back and forth from the dream to this present moment. This was too good to be true.
Your legs tightened around his waist, signaling to him that you were awfully close. He himself felt a twitch, looks like you were going to both finish on time. He continued to pound into you, your moans relentlessly sounding out into the air. Your high-pitched, surprised gasp alerted your release, his own spilling out just a few moments later. 
Your moans and sounds dwindled into heavy breathing, your chests heaving to catch up. He collapsed onto your shaky frame, your hand resting in his hair. You could barely comprehend what had just happened. You suddenly had a whole new reason to come to therapy. Hannibal lifted his head, pride written all over his face.
“I think...we’ll pick this back up next week.”
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mitsukui · 3 years
Text
blessed be the mystery of love. | f.w.
Pairing: Fred Weasley x reader.
Summary: Fred Weasley seems to be a new boy: he has fallen in love, and a couple of unexpected things have come along with it. Apparently, his recently discovered romantic interest has never heard of him, and he is now someone who...writes...love letters?! Well, that is surely weird...
Word Count: 2k.
Warnings: none!
Disclaimer: none of the pictures used in the edit below belong to me; I simply put them together.
A/N: this is probably my favorite so far! I’ve been working on it for such a long time, so I hope you all enjoy it! I’m honestly such a sucker for soft Fred...Please, leave me some feedback if you feel like it! My askbox is open for your opinions, thoughts and requests. Thank you so much for your time and attention ❤
Masterlist!
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Dark brown eyes studied your silhouette surreptitiously, which was utterly uncommon for their owner. One who once was daring now hid behind heart-felt walls that looked like you. A flirtatious behavior had been replaced by occasional stuttering and disinterest in other romantic affairs.
People around him could effortlessly notice the situation was taking its toll on him. However, they seemed too dumbfounded by it to say something – words were long gone from their lips, and from his own as well.
Fred Weasley had fallen desperately in love, but you were unaware of his existence.
Somehow, it sounded ironic: how could you not know about him?! Every single soul in Hogwarts knew who he and his twin were, and he enjoyed such a thing. Unlike his slightly younger identical brother, Fred was one to enjoy popularity and attention. He sought fame and recognition, and he would never complain if a few hookups came along with that.
And, yet, there you were – iridescent and untouchable. You were forcefully popping novel thoughts into his mind. Would you ever lay eyes on him? And if you ever did, what would you think and feel?
It was high time you noticed him, and he could only count on himself to make it happen.
Fred desired to make a different approach, one you had not yet seen. His eyes had captured a few other admirers here and there trying to get your heart, but none of them had achieved success. He ought to be the one to do that.
And love letters would most certainly help him get there.
Writing letters was an arduous task, and it consumed all of his energy. His quill scribbled fiercely against fragments of parchment, heavy sighs filled the silence around him, and every inch of his skin burned in longing and embarrassment. George could be easily found doing something like that; but not Fred. He could be found causing mischief or attaching his lips to someone else’s.
Nevertheless, there he was, combining words and allowing the dark paint to splash against the paper in order to pour his heart out.
His first letter was short – hesitant, almost; after all, it was impossible for him to know how you would react to the approach he had chosen. He had put so much effort into it, despite the small number of words and expressed feelings. It was crystal clear you deserved bigger things; even so, that scenario was entirely atypical to him.
He was just as disoriented as you were when a barn owl dropped an almost unimportant-considered envelope right in front of you, interrupting your breakfast in the Great Hall one morning.
He had been eyeing the owl entrances for a little while when he finally was able to spot the one he had previously picked for you. His lips trembled nervously, and his fingers traveled straight up. Lately, he had been developing a habit of biting his fingernails whenever he was anxious, and anxiety was the only emotion possible for that morning.
What if you ended up not liking the note? Maybe you would think he could be a creep or something similar to that. It was unknown whether you had a significant other or not. Were his words good enough? Would you ever look at him like he so lovingly looked at you?
One of your hands curiously reached out for the envelope while the other one briefly fed the owl. You furrowed your eyebrows together as your eyes ran through the lines: it was a tad difficult to read whatever was written on the parchment, given the handwriting was not one of the best. However, you managed to decode the message, and a smile soon spread across your lips. Despite the distance Fred watched you from, the boy could swear that even a small giggle spilled out from your lips.
The small note read something along the lines of:
“To the one who is now devouring my heart.
I mean no harm. My feelings are of pure admiration.
You are gold.
I hold you in my thoughts.
- W.”
The words he had previously written rang in his brain, and he felt ridiculous. He had never had a good relationship with words, writing, or anything related to that. Why on Earth had he chosen to write you a love letter? You were probably laughing at the stupidity that the note was drenched in.
You allowed both your curiosity to dwell in your core and your eyes to analyze the people who crowded the Great Hall that morning. You studied all the possibilities, and you did not notice Fred Weasley. He felt invisible and, for the first time, he enjoyed it.
After that, a second love letter was written. And then a third one, and even a fourth one, too! He grew bold once again, and his secret passion became stronger.
One day, dizzy due to his recently rediscovered boldness, he allowed his quill to dance against the parchment as he wrote you a fifth letter. This one was different from all the previous ones; he still offered you his heart and tried making you realize how much he secretly admired you. But there was something more to it – he sent you something else other than the letter alone.
The arrival of the usual owl in another freezing morning in Hogwarts quickly muffled the chatting and cutlery noises that hovered over every person in the Great Hall. It barely took you one second to smile at the sight, which caused Fred to smile himself – he absolutely adored your smile.
Those anonymous letters had become part of your daily routine, and they were something you eagerly waited for. Being both a Hogwarts student and a teenager at the same time was no easy duty. Your spirit tended to get overwhelmed from time to time, and you found yourself turning to the anonymous letters for an escape from the reality that surrounded you.
However, as soon as you brushed your fingertips against the envelope, you felt an additional weight to it, something that had never been there before. Attempting to waste no time, you reached for the letter, and a smile did not fail to paint your face; it was so easy for him to make you smile, even though you still did not know who he was.
“I must know whatever fills your heart once your eyes reach the very last word in each of my letters.
Would you mind wearing this little thing if you are not bothered by me and my confessions?
It is small and simple, but it is given to you with love.
As always, I hold you in my thoughts.
- W.”
And then, you finally saw it: a tiny decorative pin, which you figured it out as to be put on your robes. It was shaped as a white envelope sealed with a red heart. You disagreed with the words written on the letter, once you did not see it as something simple. It was beautiful. It was your new favorite thing. It was attached to your robes in the flash of an eye. And how it could not be?!
You profoundly enjoyed his secretive actions. For you, it was extremely sweet that someone admired you so much that they chose to sit down and write you comforting and loving words. A pure energy radiated from every single thing he had sent you, and you wished for an identity reveal. You wished to discover whoever your secret admirer was only to confess you also admired them, mostly because of the sweetness existing in their personality.
It was high time you solved this mystery, and you could only count on yourself to make it happen.
When his sixth letter arrived, you had one of your own as well. You did not bother reading his words right away; after all, you had more important things to do. The barn owl was distracted by one of your hands, offering it small pieces of buttered toast, while the other tied the words you had previously written up its leg.
“Can you do this for me?” You whispered gently to the animal standing close to you. As funny as it sounded, you had grown fond of that owl in a way, too. “Take this back to the one who’s been sending you to me, alright? I promise you I won’t peek! I’m asking them to meet me tonight, in Classroom Eleven. Do you think they will come?” An airy chuckle left your lips and you swore your heart was melting at how much attention the owl seemed to be paying to your words. Before it took off, the animal playfully nibbled your fingers and your smile grew wider.
Like promised, you did not allow yourself to look wherever the owl was going to. All of your curiosity was being saved for later that night. There was no way for you to know if he would ever show up, and that hurt your insides a bit. What if it had all been a cruel joke?
The same wonders that once had haunted his brain now haunted yours.
But the night did not cease to fall, and the moon did not cease to shine. It was terribly cold, but your feet still automatically took you to Classroom Eleven, one of the classrooms that were hardly ever used for classes or any other purposes. It was a risky place, given the fact that it was of so easy access. However, you thought the possibility of getting caught was rather exciting. So you entered the classroom, as quietly as you could manage, and you waited.
Fred, on the other hand, could feel his stomach being punched repeatedly by a thousand of invisible hands. He was painfully apprehensive, and one of the signs that revealed that was his constant pacing in a deserted hallway.
He obviously would never stand you up, but the thought of running away popped up in his brain a few times. This was an extremely ridiculous behavior for someone like him. And even though he knew he had to get it done, he was still so intimidated by it all.
“Just rip it off like a band-aid.” The boy whispered to himself, his steps finding a slower pace and his hands being shoved into his pockets. Deep breaths were taken and he was finally able to gather all the courage he needed to walk towards and enter the classroom.
Your body was resting against an empty desk, which it seemed like it had not been used in years. Staring out the window, you secretly wished you had worn something better for that moment; perhaps, your pajamas and a long knitted cardigan over them had not been the best choice.
When you were about to start your seventh mental curse about your idiot choices, hesitant knocks on the door made a mess out of your line of thoughts. They came as a warning that things were about to either go very well or terribly bad.
And, then, a long silence followed. Both of you panicked, each one on a different side of the wooden door. You wondered if you should answer something to the knocks, he wondered if he should have said something. Your body was straightened up, and you suddenly realized your hands were getting slightly sweaty.
He opened the heavy door so slowly that, as you watched it, you could see your life flashing right in front of your eyes.
Finally, you spotted something in the dark. Peeking through the door, your eyes captured the sight of locks of an orange marmalade shaded hair entering the classroom. Right then and there, you felt like everything had just gained a new and brighter light.
You were breathless. The boy timidly standing there, still a bit far away from you, was the most stunning human you had ever seen.
His dark eyes observed you, both curiosity and fear being expressed wordlessly. He attempted to aim a small smile at you, which you gladly accepted and offered him another smile back.
After a few moments of intense stares and exchanged grins, your voice finally cut the comfortable silence that had been set between the two of you.
“The wonders are finally ceased.”
Tag list! ❤️  @efyra​ @writingsomewrongs​ @pineapplesandpinas​ @ronweaselysslut​ @fiction-is-the-new-reality @amourtentiaa​ @emmaev​
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noritoshiikamo · 3 years
Text
game over
pairing: noritoshi kamo + fem!oc genre: angst tags//warning: established relationship, wild gojo appeared // blood, character death, emotion distress, mention of shibuya  note: the obligatory trio of mine: not well edited, lowercase intended, english isnt my first language im sorry if i murder it. note that i put descriptions of the characters i write so it would be easier for me, you’re free to imagine the character the way you seem fits! okay listen imma be honest i dont like this part that much dhhdbdjksncjddiem and im sorry if it sucks bcs istg i cant compete to part 1 and 2 of it so IM SORRY tagging @unabashednightmarepizza @sassyeahhhh @dok-ja @sukirichi [bold means i cant tag u idky :( lemme know if wanna be tagged in the next part] read the first part | second part | third part | bonus
few years ago;
“you’re fucking ridiculous!”
“you’re injured, how the fuck is it me that’s being unreasonable?”
she contemplated stabbing him straight to his chest. “i’m fine, leave me alone,” she hissed, holding on to her arm as she tried to limp away. second year jujutsu student noritoshi kamo wondered how the hell one could be this stubborn. with blood caked up on the side of her face, lips busted and bruising in the corner, not to mention the broken arm and probably twisted ankle, he could not understand how one could be this reckless and stupid, it’s almost ridiculous.
but here she is standing in front of him.
“you could’ve let me handle it,” he said, coldly.
she never turned that fast in her life; her limping leg suddenly worked fine as she hauled her ass, throwing both fists to his chest. the force put was enough to threw him back a few steps, he caught her wrists holding her from falling down. “stop acting like i’m so fragile. i can exorcist the curse just fine. you make me hate you so much,” she spitted, pure rage etched on her face, “just because i’m a girl, because i’m your girl, i’m weak. please, i am as good as you are, kamo.”
their faces were so close, he could count the freckles spread on her nose and cheeks. he loves her eyes the very first time he caught glimpse of it; one is a dull brown while the other looks like it carries the secret of the bright blue sea. this time, the eyes he loves looked hopeless, lack of the burning spirit she carried with tears threatening to spill. letting go of a wrist, his trembling hand brushed the hair coated with the blood back, carefully not to hurt her. “i never said you are bad,” he clarified, fingers busy brushing the hair back. his sudden reaction surprised her, and her body betrayed her thoughts as she eased in his arms.
he tilted her chin, his head was panicking as he realised that his brain was no longer controlling his movement as he leaned down and kissed her.
she tasted like blood.
she winced, pain aching on the swollen part and he apologized so quietly as he deepened the kiss. “nori-” her voice croaked as she swallowed his moans. he hummed, satisfied by the kiss. their foreheads rest against each other, the tip of their noses touched as they struggled to catch breath.
“stop being stupid. let me help you okay?”
“okay.”
slipping his arm under hers, he helped her walk, leading them out of the abandoned building they managed to exorcist. nothing major, a couple of pestering level three and four curses that them both handled well but their supervisor missed to tell them about the hiding level two curse that took them by surprise. she had become the curse’s main target.
if she would’ve just listened to him and stay close. he sighed.
“ouch, ouch,” she cried, clutching on her left leg, forcing him to stop. impatient, he slipped his hand under her knees, lifting her up in his arms. she apologized profusely, embarrassed to be such a burden to him. he brushed it off immediately.
“did you call them? told them that we are done?”
she gasped, “wait, i thought they’ll wait for us.”
he huffed, “you’re not that important, y/n. give them a call, please. i want to go home.”
kicking the door open, the moonlight shone on them as he carried her down to the bottom stairs. settling her down on the steps, he sat beside her, letting a long sigh. he watched as she took the call, letting them know that she was slightly injured, and they need to go back asap. she was visibly tired, and he was the same too.
he couldn’t help but to sigh at the way the moonlight enveloped her. he had loved her from the very first moment he caught his eyes on her; she caught him staring, called him out publicly and ignored all his advances. it took him a lot to court her. she’s a gojo, she can have anything and everything with the sky is the limit.
but one thing money could never buy is affection.
it started with little stuffs; noritoshi waiting for her with her lunch readied every day. it annoyed her but momo (who was secretly rooting for him) forced her to just do it. “it’s just a lunch,” momo said sheepishly. noritoshi would have them paired all the time for the missions. she’d accepted it with open heart. noritoshi would also teach her how to weld a bow and shoot arrows. she promised that she would go out on date with him if he taught her.
by the end of their first year, they became inseparable.
the idea of being apart from her hurts him physically and mentally. she took a sharp breath when he laced his fingers between her own, quickly telling the other person on the phone that she was okay. “it was just noritoshi,” she replied with a small laugh. their hands fit each other; his skin contrasted her slightly tanned skin. while his hands were rough from welding the bow and he kept his nail short and clean, hers were slightly softer with her nails painted prettily. this month she had her nails painted in pastel. all the girls’ day out with momo and mai had proven its importance. he was happy to provide her with his black card despite her discontent.
“analysing my hands now?”
he smiled slightly, “it looks very pretty. i guess i got my money worth. are they coming?”
she leaned on his shoulder, his own wrapped around her as she closed her eyes, “they are around the corner. i would definitely need another round this week,” she teased. kissing her forehead gently, he didn’t mind that his uniform was stained with her blood; he was glad that she’s safe.
“i’ll happily take you there.”
few years later;
noritoshi kamo almost lost his mind. the stadium was half destroyed, huge craters on the pitch with the sight of his wife nowhere to be found. he looked up to the black pitch curtain encasing the stadium area from the sky, a curse escaped his lips.
“where the fuck are you?” he grunted, scanning the area.
she is gone, his stubborn little wife. she could’ve just wait but annoyed that their dinner date was interrupted and eager because this was their first mission together as a married couple; she escaped his supervision. as they were dealing with minor curses outside, she decided to head on forward, leaving him to deal with whatever is left. he beat himself inside for letting her come, he could easily do this himself and send her home safely, but she blinked her eyes and he was weak. she always has her way with him.
his step stopped when he realised there was a shadow ahead.
“she’s pretty,” the thing said.
his blood ran cold, “what did you do to my wife?”
the curse let out a laugh. it was sinister enough to send chills down his spine. especially when he realised the head it was stepping on was his wife. her eyes were fluttering back and forth, struggling to stay awake. a howl shocked him, shivers down his spine at the painful whimpers her shikigami making. cursed spirits were devouring it alive, overwhelming it and chewing every part of its body. his wife was too weak to dispel the shikigami; it’s dangerous as the devoured wolf shikigami will drain her cursed energy by a second.
all shikigami linked directly to the owner; everything inflected to the wolf, she could feel it too.
he needed a plan.
hidden in his wedding ring was a retractable knife. he rarely carries blood bags anymore as his power solidified itself. the older he got, the better he was at using and controlling a small steady flow of his own blood straight from the tap. with a clap of his hands, the knife cut his hand enough to send blood shooting like bullets. the blood hit the curses straight to its cores, died out instantly on impact, but the shikigami was beyond salvageable. it let out one last howl, one last goodbye before dropping to the ground, half of his snout gone. she will be devastated, it’s her only shikigami she managed to tame at such a young age, but at least it has stopped the shikigami from stripping his wife’s cursed energy to its core.
the fire burning in his eyes only made the curse laughed. he kicked her body away, spurting blood out of her mouth. she was halfway close to death’s doorstep.
“i will fucking murder you,” he hissed.
“my blood is my power. it’s supposed to rot human, stripping its meat from the bone like acid. however,” the curse nudged her body, “your wife didn’t. humour me, did your blood tainted hers? tell me, i’m curious how.”
“are you going to chit chat because i don’t have whole day.” his blood dripped on the pitch.
the curse grinned, shrugging his shoulder. he kneeled, running his bloody fingers on her cheeks leaving trails of flowers pattern that dissipated immediately, “i’m not here to fight. i’m here to serve a warning,” he looked up to the tensed sorcerer, “for gojo satoru. tell him, we’ll be waiting for him in shibuya.” noritoshi’s face scrunched in confusion.
“we have no business with the gojos.”
“but she is. she could change her name, married you, but it doesn’t erase the fact that she carried gojo’s blood in her vein. she’s the bridge to your two clans. i’m just killing two birds with one stone. ruin the kamo clan’s relationship with gojos and hurt gojo satoru. all thanks to her,” the curse turned his back on him, his laugh echoed as he walked away. the dark curtain disappeared slowly as the ground rumbled. a perfect chance for noritoshi to strike if it wasn’t because of the cursed spirit’s words gluing him to his spot, “oh, kamo, i believe a congratulation is overdue. let me know when’s the baby is due, i would love to drop by personally.”
the pillar holding on to the roof collapsed sending wave of dust all over the place. noritoshi covered his face, coughing as he sucked some in, removing his coat as a shield. the cursed spirit was no where to be found.
“the place is going to collapse! i’ll get the curse, you go get her!”
a voice echoed and he caught a glimpse of blond hair running past him and noritoshi didn’t think twice as he sprinted around the cracks and holes. who was that voice or who was the curse, he couldn’t give a single fuck, he just wants his wife back. he was shaking when he got to her, arms immediately scooped her up in his arms. her chest was raising slowly, blood dripping on the side of her lips as she struggled to exhale.
“you’re going to be okay,”
he told her, but he wasn’t sure if he will ever be.
-
“can you turn down the stupid light, it’s hurting my eyes.”
the voice laughed melodiously, the light moved to the other eye repeating the same thing.
“as you can see, she’s awake, slightly weak, but she should be okay.”
another voice interrupted, “are you sure?” she gasped, excited to hear a familiar voice. “nori?” she called out, unable to open her eyes, relying strictly to her hearing as she reached her shaky hands out for him. “her senses might be slightly off, just let her do it herself,” the woman’s voice noted, and she felt annoyed. how dare you underestimate me, her mind scoffed.
“my senses are fine. see?” she claimed as she held noritoshi’s hand up. he smiled, gently rubbing her hand with encouragement. “thanks, shoko, we are fine.”
“i’ll leave you be then. call me if you need anything.”
she listened to the clacking of shoko’s heels, followed by the door opening and slamming shut. she jumped, but he held her hand tighter, reassuring her that it’s alright. “so why can’t i see?” she asked, confident that they are alone now. she felt the bed sunk a little on the left side, “you were high on anesthesia, i’m surprise you could even move your jaw to speak.” she felt a finger brushed her hair aside, breath loomed on her face and she could feel her own face reddening up.
“are you going to kiss me or are you just going to tease me?” his heart swell up, despite her shaky voice almost made him laugh.
“do you trust me?” his hand cupped her cheek gently.
she nodded eagerly, “always.”
“good.”
his kiss hit her like a waft of fresh air. every kiss felt like a first kiss to her that she couldn’t help to react so eagerly to it. his tongue slipped through her defense, overwhelming her taste buds with such strong taste of iron. it didn’t stop her. she knew what he was doing from start. he peeked a little, didn’t stop a second from kissing her as he watched his blood marking appeared on her face. her hands went up around her neck pulling him closer and he obeyed, deepening the kiss.
heal; his mind commanded.
after a while, she pulled back, being the one to break apart from the kiss first, her chest raising up and down as she struggled to catch her breath. her eyes were wide open now, fluttering lazily as she leaned back on the propped-up pillow. he wiped the corner of his lips, eyes on her as he watched the open wound on her face and arms slowly closed leaving the fresh healed red marks behind. he relaxed when he heard a thank you coming from her, as she checked her healed arms.
“i’m disappointed with you,” he finally broke the silence.
“really?” she frowned. he always does this thing where he will immediately go into lecture mood every time she does something that pisses him off. it’s almost like a game to her as she waited for him to explode, “right now? not even going to wait until i’m discharged. this is a new record, toshi. like shoko said, i’m fine.” he shook his head, “it doesn’t make it right. you always disobeyed me. ignored my orders, going about with your goddamn big head, you could’ve been killed.”
she rolled her eyes, noritoshi is being noritoshi, what a drama queen, she mentally rolled her eyes, “but i’m not,” she pushed her hair back, twisting it easily into a simple loose knot, “i told you, i am not weak.”
“your shikigami was destroyed, your blood was poisoned, 70 percent was already circulating to every part of your vein, i had to beg for the higher up to help purify your blood,” her smile died down. this game no longer feels fun for her. noritoshi was really mad this time. “you think it’s fun and all game but game over, y/n. you need to stop doing this. if you can’t do it for me, do it for yourself.”
“leave me alone, nori, if you just going to nag, please i don’t want to hear it. i’m tired.”
it made him angry that she was taking his word lightly. running his hand in his messy hair, he felt like hauling his head to the wall.
“you don’t understand-”
she slammed her hand on the bed, interrupting his words, “no YOU don’t understand me, i’m tired of you babying me. i’m an adult, i am your wife, stop treating me like a fucking child! we have been married for months, but god you’re suffocating me.”
“i will when you stop endangering yourself. i will stop treating your like a child when you stop acting like one. you’re pregnant, for the love of god!” he threw his hand on the wall. the wall cracked from the force. “i’m what?” she felt the world stopped spinning. she was hundred percent sure that her ears and head were deceiving her. he removed his hand from the hole he made on the wall, his body shaking from the amount of anger building up.
“noritoshi, answer me! what do you mean- i’m not pregnant, i had my period this month.”
“you are,” he shrugged. he felt something hit him in the back; looking down he saw the fluffy white pillow sitting by his feet.
he pointed to the bedside table where a sonogram perched up against a tissue box. she was about to lose her mind. “this is not funny, if this is your mean way of fucking me up because i won’t listen to you then this is just fucking cruel.”
he marched towards him, his hand went down on his chin, forcing her eyes on him, “until you stop playing your stupid games, until you stop treating your life like it’s nothing, until you consider my feelings and my worries, as your husband is valid, i do not exist in your life,” tears fell down her cheeks, “like you, i’m tired too.
“nori i-“
he left her before she could say a word. she broke into sob; her chest was pounding so hard that the blood pressure monitor was beeping. the door burst opened but it was not the face she wanted to see. she was immediately hysterical. satoru managed to hold her wrist down before she ripped the tubes and needles off her arms. “no, no, i want nori. where is he!” she screamed as satoru held her down. “you need to calm down, it’s not good for the baby,” satoru cooed, but she was not having it. he turned to shoko, “her cursed energy is skyrocketing, she’s going hysterical, do something!”
“let me go!”
shoko held out a syringe, “hold her down.”
she screamed, thrashing so rough that she almost slipped out of the strongest sorcerer’s hands. she managed to get a needle out before she felt another sharp pain on her back. shoko pulled the empty needle out and they retreated away as she fell on her butt backward. she was reduced to a babbling mess, her eyes drooped as she struggled to fight the waves of sleepiness hitting her one after another.
“tell him i’m sorry,” she croaked out, before everything turned completely dark.
the blood pressure monitor returned back to normal.
three days later;
“are you still going to ignore her? it’s been 3 days.”
“she needs to learn her place.”
gojo satoru disagreed. he eyed the head of the clan, shaking his head before standing up. he thought he could convince noritoshi kamo to visit his wife, but the man was as stubborn as- huh, her.
“i think she have learned enough, she’s miserable. you’re miserable.”
the man glared at the blonde man child, raising the cup of tea up for a sip. the tea doesn’t taste as good as the way she made it. he left her for 3 days and he found himself struggling to do everything alone. 
he, noritoshi kamo, 23 years old and the head of the kamo family, could not make a cup of fucking tea.
she always said that the best way to make tea depends on how long you let it steep. “too early and you won’t get the right amount of flavour,” she explained, her back facing him as he watched from the counter as she loomed over the stove, “but if you steep it way too long you going to burn the tea leaves and it will make everything taste bitter.” she turned around, a huge smile on her face that made his heart skipped a beat.
he frowned; the tea tasted bitter.
“she’s pregnant, she’s supposed to be crazy. you are supposed to be the wise one. she is going to carry your child for 9 long months, i can’t explain to you how long that’s going to be but she is allowed to be crazy.”
he dropped the cup on the floor when gojo’s hand grabbed him by his collar, pulling him up from his chair.
“now please, see your goddamn wife before i deck you in the mouth.”
“i will.”
satisfied with his answer, gojo’s demeanor changed and he was again the man child they all know of him. noritoshi could no longer focus on the report in front of him; not when his mind is full of her and only her.
would she forgive him? he wasn’t sure.
but he would spend his lifetime making up to her and the baby if that’s necessary.
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lilsuzn · 3 years
Text
MLQC Lucien - NSFW abc headcanons
Sorry I was gone for so long. I was busy doing hot girl shit.
Fandom: Mr. Love: Queen's Choice
Warnings: S.M.U.T.  (the reader is gender neutral, but I quote Lucien’s “silly girl” at one point so idk)
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
It’s probably because of this relationship you two have. One that Lucien thought he could never have.
Frankly, he didn’t really want one. Even with you.
But it was impossible to stop himself from jumping into that rabbit whole.
You are not even a human for him. You are far superior.
A goddess.
A greater being that must be worshiped. Cherished. LOVED THOROUGHLY and Lucien can't stop himself from doing all that.
He would help you clean up with so much care. Hold you like he’s about to lose you. Wisper praises and declarations of love into your ear.
Prefers to stay in bed, but wouldn’t mind to do it in a bath either.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
He never really gave it much thought, but if you’d ask him, he would probably say - his neck.
Because he noticed how much attention you give it. That given a choice you would always kiss and bite on the neck.
And the unreformable tease he is - he loves your ears.
The way you twitch and squirm when he licks the or softly blows around them. The way you flush when he leans in to whisper directly to it.
All those small reactions get his blood pumping.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
A big fan of cuming onto you.
Your ass is his staple favorite, but chest, stomach, back or… basically anywhere else is not bad at all either.
If he ever comes inside you without a condom… and gets to see his seed dripping out of you… IT’S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL CHANGE OF PERSPECTIVE FOR HIM.
Nothing can beat the look of his seed spilled on your pretty butt, BUT… damn that’s a nice sight.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He doesn’t believe that some deeds can be dirty or naughty.
He's a scientist. Explorer of human's brain. He knows that every single of those is a normal, human thing.
But given that we all know what is this question all about…
Lucien really liked to draw when he was a kid and he still does it from time to time.
And what else could he sketch in his free time if not the most beautiful creation of this world? You. Naked.
He has countless amounts of those at this point. Every part of you has a separate piece. He likes to go through them from time to time.
Meaning every day when you're not around.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Lucien is not a virgin but he had never been in a real relationship before you.
He had some one night stands. A few booty call relationships, but he had never been with someone the way he is with you.
So you were still a challenge, because he could not allow himself any shortcomings when it came to you.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
That’s a spoiler for the future, but Lucien is more than willing to try everything and he doesn’t really feel any special bond with a particular position.
However he does have a particular group and if you remember what I said in C above, you know where I’m going.
From behind. Seeing your butt shake. He’s an ass man. (would love to try anal if you’d show an intrest in that)
Major bonus points if you turn your head to the side and look at him. With your lovely, beautiful face that he loves oh so much.
He instantly speeds up to the point that no man should ever reach and will happily carry you around for a day or two - you’ll need it.
Because after that there could never be only one round. Or even two or three.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
I wouldn’t call it goofy.
It’s very intense. Almost in a spiritual sense.
For Lucien sex is a metter of high importance. There’s no room for fooling around.
He needs to focus, so afterwards you’re completely spent, blissed and fucked to the point where you could never enjoy sex with any other man.
Toxic trait of this cutesy otome boy - possessiveness, and although he won’t try to control what and with who you do... 
(the man has some dignity and respect for your autonomy)
He will make sure you won’t be able to forget who makes you feel so f*in' good and being ‘goofy’ won’t make the statement.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
I think Lucien would be somewhat groomed, but not bold.
Shaving just isn’t natural and therefore necessarily good for one’s body.
Therefore, if you shave he might try to convince you to stop.
I want to touch a woman, not a girl - he would say.
Carpet matches the drapes (however I like to think that Lucien has ginger pubes dontjudgeme)
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Said first in A, now will be more specific.
With Lucien sex is some kind of a ritual of worship.
It’s a sacrifice for his goddess. His energy, his time, his most attentive care.
Love beams from his eyes even stronger than light does from the sun.
The foreplay will be elongated. You need to come at least twice before he enters you (see T).
During he roams your body with his hands. Boldly, but not aggressively… unless you’d like it.
Afterwards… well, just read A again.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He’s a very busy man, so he doesn’t get many chances, but…
When he can he’s right at it… thinking of that pretty ass of yours.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Lucien is quite kinky.
He's in for anything that doesn’t go under N conditions. Anything. 
Likes bondage. No. He loves it. On you. And blindfolds.
SPANKING.
DOM BOY, but wouldn’t mind to go sub from time to time for you.
You want you to submit thoroughly, so he can thoroughly please you. Give you all that can be given.
Lives for roleplaying.
He also is really into body worship. He will praise you to the point of incredibility. 
See T gir. It’s really an intense game.
Lives to hear you beg for him.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
He likes to be in a private, comfortable place, when he doesn’t have to worry about any interruptions or other inconveniences.
Best in your or his place.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
First of all he really needs no convincing.
BUT.
The beast is awake momentarily when you wear his clothes. Like his sweater when you're cold. Or a shirt after a passionate night.
"You make a very nice sight indeed."
Other thing is lingerie. He likes it dark and erotic. Satin and straps. Maybe some nice, sheer mesh.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
No humiliating one another.
Nothing that even comes close to making you feel like he might have attempted to disrespect you.
Also - no outsiders.
And no hiding one another's fantasies. He’s there to please and satisfy you. Don’t take it away from him.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Eghem.
Can you stay up all night
Fuck me till the daylight 
34+35
If you don't get it yet, it means he wants to 69 with you.
All night. Every night.
The taste of you in his mouth is heavenly.
The feeling and sight of your mouth enveloping his groin is pure ecstasy.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
He doesn’t have much of a fav.
It all depends on his mood.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Meh...
It’s not like an unacceptable option, but he prefers delayed gratification.
Will agree if you insist, but won’t ever offer.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)
OF COURSE. YES. PLEASE.
Why would he ever limit himself to known and obvious, when there might be something far, far superior to what both of you already know.
He enjoys erotic literature. Sometimes reads online articles about interesting positions, toys or new ways to make you come harder and faster.
Won’t shy away from many things. Just remember about what I said in N.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
This man rarely sleeps. Rarely even rests.
This man is a rabbit.
It's more likely you will pass out of exhaustion then that he will take a break from fucking you. Weather it's with his hands, dick, lips or… other things. 
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Speaking of other things.
And fucking.
Lucien invested in a nice collection for the two of you. Vibrators. Rings. Suckers.
He likes to please you in every way he can. 
While the toys take care of you, you suck onto him.
Sometimes you just embrace yourself as the toys take care of your needs. And you go like this for hours. Until you can't take it anymore.
And let's not forget the bondage equipment. Ropes, handcuffs, blindfolds, gags, whips….
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Obvi. What did you expect?
A lot.
For hours.
Until all you’re able to say is “Lucien” and “Please”.
Edging is not negotiable. Happens every time. Often to the point when you come so fast and unexpectedly he just couldn’t stop on time.
Will talk dirty to your ear in public to then “accidently” stroke your nipple or if he feels particularly bold that day - your crotch.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Not shy at all. No shame.
Will moan, groan, pant and hiss all he wants and as loudly as he wants.
Let the neighbors hear. Why would he feel ashamed of fucking you?
LOVES when you do the same.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
He would love to take you for a weekend trip. In the mountains. Renting a nice cottage.
Necessarily with a fireplace. And a jacuzzi.
He would have it decorated with many, many gleaming candles. Set all around the cottage.
The soothing music would play.
His fingers would play with your sex while you soak yourselfs in the jacuzzi.
Then he would lay you on a soft carpet in front of the fireplace and make love to you. True, unmistakable love.
It would be a trip to remember for the rest of your lives.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
First off all, see this meme.
He just emanuates that massive dick energy. That’s just facts. No one in the bunch can relate. I’m sorry stans of the other 4, it’s not my fault, don’t @ me.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
High. Very high sometimes.
Okay - usually very high, sometimes extremely high.
All nighters will happen at least once a week unless one of you really has a tough week or just had one and still tries to get everything together.
Otherwise no mercy. His lover needs to have all her needs fulfilled. Lucien would never allow you to walk around hungry or cold. Why would he let you be unsatisfied in this category, silly girl?
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Not right away for sure. 
He wants to watch you fall asleep. And then see those cutest expressions you make in your slumber.
Sometimes he just grabs a book and holds your hand until you wake up.
Other times he isn't able to resist it and falls asleep. You in his arms. His world at peace.
177 notes · View notes
solomonish · 3 years
Text
he comes with a warning sign (satan & his brothers)
One of these things is not like the other...the one born as soon as the others fell, the one made entirely of feelings they'd all rather forget.
ao3 link: here!
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Satan started his life crashing into the ground, the impact creating a crater that is now considered a piece of Devildom history.
His first memory was the gut-wrenching jolt of falling through the air, watching as a man he didn’t know let out his anguish in a mess of feathers, blood, and tears Satan vaguely felt he wasn’t supposed to see. The next was of his collision, a bone-shattering hit that, somehow, only sent a dull ache through his body. Black feathers floated down around him, some matted with blood falling faster than the others, soft like the ones inexplicably around his neck in a boa. Around him, he could hear quiet moans of pain and the occasional sob, a cacophony that both grated in his ears but fit the turmoil that threatened to spill out from within him. Those first moments were nothing but hatred, an acidic burn within him so strong it felt like all he’d ever know.
Emotion didn’t come easy to him. For the longest time, he felt like an animal, some form of furious energy trapped in a cage of demonic armor that wouldn’t give no matter how often he lashed out. Occasionally, he’d manage to reach his arm between the bars and swipe at whoever made the mistake of getting close, attempting to ease him into the familial life that was expected of him. Who were these people? Why did they think they could expect him to care about them? It didn’t matter to him that they were shrinking from him, undoubtedly fighting behind closed doors about who’s turn it was to see him. In a way, it made him feel better. They should feel as angry as he did.
Even after he calmed down - convinced himself to put on a show of obedience for the right to stretch his legs and not have to wonder if the others forced the orange-haired one named Beelzebub to send his dinner (meaning he’d get none at all) - he was still aloof, uninterested in what the others thought about spot in their family. Eventually, he’d learn: learn of what they used to be, what they did to fall from that place, and of the person they lost. For the first time, he cared about the misfitting sensation inside of him. After all, he’d very much rather feel like an intrusion than a replacement.
The knowledge of what happened introduced that new emotion to him, a sort of sympathetically charged guilt that he, hah, hated. The others were in no state to teach him how to be a person. Their means of teaching him to be something other than a feral beast were certainly some sort of violation of his personal rights. So, instead, he took to reading, desperate to find answers to questions he didn’t yet know how to ask. Through the many novellas and epics, the treatises and research journals, entire libraries worth of fiction and nonfiction, Satan began to piece himself together. He taught himself how to craft a facade of sympathy and understanding, how to mask the anger that constantly boiled inside of him, and tuned himself to his emotions lest he fall back into the vat he always hovered just above. Cats and books calmed him down. Black feathers and Lucifer made him lose his grip.
Perhaps it was because, if he reached back as far as his memory went, the only thing he saw when his entire body burned with pure wrath was Lucifer himself and a tornado of feathers. Maybe it was because Lucifer seemed to watch him and regard him as a miniature version of himself, then promptly remind Satan that he would always be a step beneath his legacy. All Satan knew was, on the days Mammon would call on his crows to complete a scheme and the yard was littered with their feathers, his mood soured in the same way it was when Lucifer even made his presence known.
Every day, Satan had to wrestle with emotions the meanings of which he had to discern for himself, emotions that never should have been his in the first place. The war that raged inside his very core was only the product of a failure, a symbolic continuation of what robbed his “brothers” of someone he would never meet. There was no way he and this Lilith could exist at the same time, and Satan often wondered how readily the others would trade him for a chance to have her back.
Satan did not waste time wallowing in self-pity. However, despite his practiced control, he could not stop the frown that always formed when someone spoke of his origins. He was the product of Lucifer’s wrath and grief, a part of Lucifer that he tried so desperately to claw out of himself he disfigured himself in the process. Lucifer was once the most brilliant angel, the morningstar himself. Satan was the worst part of him, an embodiment of that which he could never want, not in his grace as an angel or his degeneracy as a demon.
If any of his brothers caught on to this pattern of thinking, they never breached the topic. Perhaps they agreed. Satan wasn’t sure he’d want to know if they did.
His withdrawal from the others was only natural. His violence in the beginning effectively conditioned them to stay away, and he could only imagine the things they associated him with in their grief. As they all did their best to move on, letting their broken bones fuse crooked, Satan gave up on his hope of ever fitting in. He was the youngest, yet the fourth most powerful - the one in the middle, splitting up the older and younger siblings and somehow not quite meshing with either group. When Diavolo commented on the everlasting love of brothers, Satan smiled and nodded. If he could put on an act of being a composed individual, he could put on an act of being a true member of their family. With how absorbed they were in themselves, it was rare the topic ever came up.
The only one who seemed to care was Lucifer. Even then, he only seemed to want to be his brothers’ keeper, if only for the disciplinary privileges it gave him. When Satan stepped out of line - which seemed to be always- Lucifer was quick to remind him that, oh, perhaps they weren’t brothers. Something churned in his gut, nothing like the bile he pretended rose up at the thought of being Lucifer’s son. As Satan simmered in his fury, silently planning something to get back at Lucifer, he wondered if they truly did find pleasure in reminding him how much he didn’t belong.
Logic said that only Lucifer knew to plan psychological torture that way, but Satan was under no obligation to forgive the behavior of the others on the ground of ignorance.
So, as was only natural, Satan came with a warning sign. He was the one to be wary of, a ball of uncontrollable rage disguised as one of them. His smiles were all surface-level and fake, hiding his true, devious intentions. Be careful around him - better yet, don’t associate yourself with him more than you have to.
After all, he had been pushed away from the beginning, a volatile bundle of emotions that Lucifer couldn’t - didn’t want to - deal with. There was no place for him anywhere when he had been tossed aside like trash from the start.
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ukai-simp-services · 3 years
Text
because i love you
prompt: tainted hues: “if you loved them, why did you break their heart?”
@tooruluv | #tooruluv2kparty
oikawa x fem!reader
warnings: heavy angst, poor mental health, depression, heartbreak, small panic attack, alcoholism.
a/n: why am i so sad after writing this,, i think this is my first time writing angst with no fluff T^T
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  somewhere in argentina, there is a large penthouse with tall windows and cornered with perfectly trimmed green hedges. the interior of the penthouse is simple, there are no memories cluttering the walls, there are no fairy lights adorning the windows, there are no bento boxes in the fridge, and there are no sweet scented candles in every room of the house.
  there is only dull colored furniture, only overflowing laundry baskets, only a kitchen sink filled to the brim with dirty dishes, and only empty liquor bottles littering the dining table. 
  a home without you, is hardly a home.
  in this penthouse, a young man, barely 25 years old, sits at the kitchen table with a glass of fernet in his hand. one large window is opened, letting the warm evening breeze rustle the thin kitchen curtains and brush over his exposed skin. 
  oikawa still couldn’t stop thinking about what iwaizumi had asked him two years ago. 
  no amount of mind numbing liquor could ever make him forget that interaction -inevitably, the last face-to-face interaction he ever had with his best friend. 
  “oikawa, if you loved her, then why would you break her heart?”
   oikawa gasps to himself, suddenly feeling chills run up his back, as if the memory happened just yesterday.
  he remembers vividly how furious iwaizumi’s voice was and the tired look in his best friend’s eyes - a look that all but told oikawa that he was exhausted picking up the shattered pieces that he always left behind.
  he downs the glass of fernet.
  he pours himself another.
  he remembers that, that was the first time he had nothing to say - the first time that tōru oikawa was at a loss for words. because men like oikawa, men with quick rebuttals and prepared excuses, always knew exactly what to say in every situation. 
  that day, iwaizumi had walked away from oikawa with sadness in his eyes, no trace of hostility to be found anymore. there was no slap to the back of oikawa’s head, no ear piercing screaming of a lecture, and no insults thrown at him. there was nothing.
  but oikawa would’ve preferred a slap to the head or some sort of beating.
  a gentle ache presents itself in oikawa’s throat, threatening a small cry to stumble out.
  oikawa washes it away with a swig to his drink.
  iwaizumi is a faint presence in oikawa’s life now, he calls and texts - the occasional check up - but he had stopped being his best friend a long time ago. 
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  losing a brother pains him; it burns from the depths of his core, but losing you practically kills him; it steals every bit of oxygen from his lungs. 
  because, ultimately, you were his reason for living - for breathing; your warmth, your comfort, your presence is what kept oikawa going every day. without you, his days are meaningless, he inevitably lives his life without purpose. 
  but, now he finds it ironic; he chose volleyball over you, his life.
  everyday, from 9am to 7pm, he mindlessly serves, sets, and passes a volleyball. for hours on end, he feels his muscles contract and relax as he tosses the ball up high, just for him to smack it down against a cold and shiny gym floor, he watches at it ricochets back into the air just to fall back down onto the ground again. bounce bounce bounce, till the sound ceases and the ball rests in its place.  
  oikawa now wonders when a blinding passion - a heart pounding desire to play this sport, turned into just a distraction. he finds that now when the very familiar surface of the volleyball brushes up against his palm, he no longer feels his adrenaline pumping with excitement; he feels resent.
  because trying to dissipate his memories of you by overworking his body everyday no longer worked anymore, if anything it only made things worse. 
  every game, every screech of his name from the crowd, every praising cheer after he makes an award winning serve, it all reminds him that you aren’t in the stands cheering him on. faces upon faces, all different colors and all different shapes, none of them are yours. 
  oikawa hisses as he feels a dull ache in his knee, the same knee you would spend hours massaging after practice every day.
  the lump in his throat has become more apparent now, he drowns it out with the bitter liquid in his cup - trying to suppress the feelings that will always be there. 
  he is only 25, yet he can feel his body beginning to give up on him. his muscles are weaker than they were two years ago, his bones throb under his weight with every step he takes, and his mind is continuously drifting off into oblivion. 
  he wonders who he is living for at this point. he can’t lie to himself and say that volleyball is his reason, because then who is he playing it for?
  this country; even with its busy streets and loud music - he still can’t help but feel alone. 
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  his favorite memory of you plays in his mind like a film, it’s grainy and colored with a brown, faded hue. your hair whipping in the wind, your dress flowing over your hips, your feet sinking into the sand, your hand intertwined with his, and your mouth open with that melody of a laugh spilling out of it. 
  he remembers your skin felt soft, flawless against his calloused palm. shimmering silver earrings decorated your ears, a gift he had gotten you for your birthday. the air around you was warm, despite the unforgiving ocean winds that was tussling through your hair and clothes. 
  as the memory plays, your laugh begins to fade away in the wind, the already loud noise getting increasingly louder and louder. his ears are ringing now, he can’t hear your laugh anymore. the sky is no longer a heavenly blue, it is now an unsettling gray. your body, your hand holding his, the scenery of the beach, is being ripped from his mind and transforming into a different memory, one he would kill to forget. 
  there you were, eyes big and brimming with tears, standing in front of him. the beach background has now turned into your shared apartment in japan, both of you in the living room. you open your mouth, but oikawa can’t hear your voice - he remembers your words vividly, but his mind refuses to play them. 
  tears spilling down your cheeks, your hands balled into fists; oikawa watches as he breaks down the one person who he deemed to be unbreakable. everything he had built - everything you had built, he watches fall apart for the hundredth time. 
  a sharp pain shoots through his chest, snapping him back to reality.
  he clutches at the fabric of his t-shirt, heaving breaths fall from his lips as he tries to compose himself. 
  the cup full of fernet falls to the floor, pieces of his heart are scattered on the floor alongside the broken glass. 
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  oikawa lost meaning in his life the second he walked out the door that shameful day; he lost his motivation, his strive.
  everyday, his body aches with loss. the sounds of cars racing down the busy streets, the loud music playing from his favorite coffee shop, the smacking of countless volleyballs being slammed down onto gym floors, and the lively chattering coming from some rom-com that he left playing on his flat screen tv, all sound like background noise to him - numbly playing in his ears as background music to the memories he constantly has playing in his mind. 
  oikawa never knew about loss or pain until you, never imagined that this is what it would feel like. 
  but, loss has made him wiser; he knows now what will lie ahead for the both of you. he knows that as years come and go, the pain will begin to diminish a little, bit by bit - but he also knows that there’s no way that it’ll ever fully leave his heart. 
  because, as he gets older, he’ll only get more tired. his skin will begin to wrinkle, hair will start to gray, his bones will ache from weight of the world, his lungs will begin collapsing from the pressure constantly on his chest, and his heart will eventually cease to beat, from the death grip you still have on it. 
  he will age unforgivingly, eyes devoid of any color - they have already lost the once charming glint they used to hold. 
  unlike him, he knows you’ll only burn brighter as the upcoming years pass you by. 
  you’ll get back on your feet, your skin will glow again, your muscles will strengthen and your heart will beat with a newfound passion to love yourself - that’s something he’s always admired about you, the passion you held for all things involving love.
  you’ll age with an unstoppable beauty; you’ll laugh and smile so much that permanent crinkles will form next to your eyes, you’ll dance so much that your muscles grow tired, you’ll fall in love again and have all those kids you wanted - kids that will fill every single gap in your heart that oikawa left behind. 
  despite pure science and human biology, your youth will never leave you. you’re one of the few people oikawa has met that have the ability to live young forever. your soul is unbreakable. sure, oikawa may have put a mere scratch on it, but he never came close to cracking it. 
  and that’s the difference between you and him; he will die miserable and alone, heart poorly stitched together and the inside of his body bruised and weak. you will pass away surrounded by people who also - like him - became allured by your kind spirit and your lively energy. his body will fall weak from exhaustion, but yours will fall weak from years of dancing and laughing and singing. his heart will die battered with pain, your heart will die full of love and forgiveness. 
  it’s painful to think about, but oikawa knows this is the truth, and simply just how life works. he won’t sugarcoat it for himself, he knows his ending is exactly what he deserves. 
  so he begins writing a note. the bottle of fernet he was previously so dependent on, is now long forgotten. he holds a shiny black pen in his hand and a white slip of paper in his other. he clicks the pen and holds the tip above the blank page for a few beats; hesitating, before he’s letting the words flow out. 
  it starts, with an answer to a question.
  “i broke her heart, because i love her.”
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124 notes · View notes
angelguk · 4 years
Text
→ bad behaviour 03 — a namjoon scenario
member: kim namjoon
word count: 7.5k
rating: 18+
genre: established relationship + smut + college!au 
warnings: we’re ovulating!!! / introduction to the breeding kink that will plague this couple forever / was meant 2 be a drabble?? im incapable we know that / eh big joon!!!! / manhandling kink / pet names used a lot / joon thinks he’s gf is dumb and wants to breed her idk man / size kink / crying when cumming / oc shy for once / discussion of twitter porn / creampie / oc is on birth control (obvs dont do this if u dont want a kid but this is a fanfic u know) / mentions of fisting porn / cock warming!! / if u see a typo no u dont
soundtracks: more than enough + morroco, alina baraz
prompt: “don’t you think there is always something unspoken between two people?” (Something Unspoken, Tennessee Williams).
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It’s a rather serene Thursday afternoon, the late autumn breeze sweeping through the campus air. The stillness was ideal for studying, alluding to assignment deadlines creeping round the corner. Which was why your butt is firmly parked in the mess of Kim Namjoon's sheets.
The man in question is hunched in the corner of his dorm room, one large hand idly tugging at the chestnut mane on his head and his neck curved with attentiveness. You wish you possessed the determinate focus that he had, but your thoughts have a mind of their own, spiralling further into the darkest depths of your mind as they gingerly coax forth memories that spark a searing heat deep inside of you. You feel tight, drawn like the bow of an arrow, a stark contrast to the tranquillity spilling around you. The fact that Namjoon is practically naked isn’t helping your consciousness. Your gaze lingers on the rows of muscles lining his broad back, the tension running through them emphasising the dips and curves in his golden skin. His eyes, however, are glued to the myriad of words before him, the pen grasped in his grip swift as he scribbles down notes you know you’ll never be able to decipher. Not that you needed too, it was intriguing that such a put-together man like Namjoon had handwriting that essentially resembled chicken scratch. It was atrocious — but still elegant, very much embodying the person to whom the writing belonged to. You can’t recall what assignment he intended to complete today — something about the presentation of nihilism in Russian literature or whatever — but he’s devoted all his attention to it, meticulous in the numerous sticky notes and page markers that line the novel perched on his desk. It’s bent with the remembrance of his fingers, sepia-toned dogged-ear pages staring at the ceiling of his dorm room. Something blooms within you the longer you look at him, faint but strong like a tide shifting towards the shores. You don’t even register the slip of your laptop from your lap, legs sprawling open unconsciously. It spurs so quick you can’t even clamp down on it, the desire you have for the burly man bent over his world of words just a few steps away. But you know how much Namjoon values his academics. It’s with a muffled groan that you roll over, burrowing your face into his pillows in hopes that the wave will subside. It doesn't — crawling beneath your skin begging you to give in.
It’s the click of Namjoon’s pen that gets you, a sharp note that cuts through the burning of your body. Your thighs seal together, the slick that collects between your legs sticking to your core. With a sigh that you shift again, reaching out for your laptop. It’s best to look for a distraction, give him the space he needs to concentrate. At yet, your gaze can’t help but drift. He’s not covering an inch of skin, burly arms and thick thighs on display like he wants to tempt you. There are no words to describe how much you hate him —  nor how much you long to have him inside of you too.
You recall it with a jolt — the lave of his wide tongue against your folds, licking you apart with deft swift swipes that leave you weeping into his sheets more nights than you’d like to admit. You shuffle again, helpless to the yearnings of your mind. The heat on your inner thighs is a phantom. Namjoon likes to hold you down, press your hips into his sheets against the whims of your squirming. It’s the way he looks at you when you’re on the verge of tears, a wanton hunger in his eyes that unravels you fast. You can almost see it, thighs subconsciously nudging against each other. Then there’s the stretch of his fingers, larger than you own. He’s pushed you to the edge with just two of them before, persistent against that spot inside of you until he’s satisfied with the blissed slackness that descends upon your features. Then he’d add another, and another. There’s an undeclared thought between the two of you. You’ve noted the fisting porn in his Twitter bookmarks. Maybe one day you’ll have the guts to let him try.
For now, you swallow it down. Suffocate that longing until the embers burning within you smother to ashes. Your laptop returns to resting at an angle at your hip, gaze idling running through your readings. The words don’t sink in though, sitting on your skull before hastily floating away. There’s not much space for anything else but Namjoon at the moment, no matter how hard you try to reread the paragraphs or stare at your screen. You don’t even have to open the app on your phone to know what’s going on with your body. This is your first full ovulation with him. Usually, he’s preoccupied with assignments or TA responsibilities that cut your time together short, interrupting this part of your cycle and leaving you to your own devices. You hadn’t fully wormed your way into Namjoon’s life to demand all his attention just yet. This was still new, untested. Namjoon was independent and so sure of himself that telling your boyfriend that you needed him to stop focusing on his future to raw the crap out of you (multiple times) felt incredibly selfish.
You stare at the words in front of you until they swim, wishing you didn’t feel like this. Like you needed Namjoon to breathe. You can wait it out, maybe get what you’re dying for after post-studying cuddles and take-out. Even if it takes every ounce of your willpower to clasp your legs together and not jump the wonderfully large man that is your boyfriend.
Unbeknown to you, the same yearning that plagues you chips away at his resolve. A persistent want that wavers in the back of his mind, clamouring for attention, because even with his eyes stuck on the pages beneath him, he can sense your fidgeting.
Your attention span is incredibly short — Namjoon knows this. It ricochets off the walls even when you’re sitting still. It’s taken time, but Namjoon has gradually adjusted to it, muting the powerful waves of energy that radiate off of you when necessary. Today, however, is different. That energy he’s learnt to ignore eats him alive, sinking below his skin and leaving him buzzed as he scours his brain for any meaningful essay points. He keeps flipping through the pages of the novel, mind attempting and miserably failing to piece together a cohesive argument that correlates with the evidence he’s got highlighted in a loud neon yellow.
All because he can’t stop thinking about you.
He wants to blame it on the fact that he hasn’t seen you in a while (which is a blatant lie). Namjoon saw you two days ago. You were wearing that floral skirt that he loves, the fabric hiking up your thighs whenever you lined yourself against his side, snuggling deep into him like you never wanted to leave. He hates that skirt — hates it —  because now he can’t think of anything but it, thoughts blurring at the memory of your bare skin. Skin that he loves to mark, latch onto until violets and blues blossom. His mind is running before he can catch it, falling into a dangerous reminiscence of images that sit heavy in his gut. That stupid skirt flipped up your waist and his head between your thighs. Nothing feels as good as you do on his tongue. He loves the way you taste, the sounds that drift from your lips, the way your thighs twitch and tremor as you unravel underneath him. You get so loud when your high hits you. He knows his roommates have heard you before, but he truly doesn’t care. He loves hearing you scream his name, drives him to the brink of insanity if he’s being honest. Yet, it’s the way you look at him afterwards, a deliriousness swimming in your eyes that makes Namjoon want to keep you in his bed forever. Fuck you until you can’t walk without feeling him deep inside of you. Paint your skin so that everyone knows who you belong to.
His head hits the table with a muted thud, a low sighing escaping into the air. The tent in his loose shorts hurts. There’s a part of him that’s mortified — how could he get hard just from the thought of you when you're sitting right there on his bed? Perhaps it’s proof that you’ve invaded everything he is. His space, his heart, his mind.
“Namjoon?” You question, tone tentative in the silence that consumes him whole. “You okay?”
“I’m fine,” he grunts. And then his brain settles, a tightness in his stomach that he can’t deny. “Actually, no I’m not.”
You don’t even have time to register it before he's moving towards you. It's as if he's flown from his desk, gliding through the space between you to firmly plant himself on top of you. Your laptop is knocked to the side, lost in the muss of his bed sheets as Namjoon moulds himself into you. You can't help the breathless giggle that hits the air. It's cut by the weight of Namjoon on you. He's heavy, all hard muscles and broad shoulders. Your fingertips slip against the fabric of his shirt — 100% pure cotton because he's fastidious like that — a lightness forming in your chest just from the feel of him in your hands. He sighs and you melt, losing yourself in him as he burrows his head into the hollow of your neck. The kiss he places there is soft, but it hits like a torrent of rain, drowning you harshly. Your body ignites like the flame you wanted to smother was never extinguished. You cling to him, the only thing keeping you afloat in the wave of adoration that crashes into you.
"What are you doing? What's wrong?" You murmur, vibrating when he kisses you again. Namjoon hums in response, his wide hands shifting to settle on the back of your thighs, gently spreading your legs apart to nestle himself there. Your back jolts when you feel it — feel him. Hard and needy against your core, a heat radiating where you meet. The flutter in your eyes is automatic, brain shutting down when he rolls his hips. He nips your neck then, a light press of his teeth into the delicate skin. You stop breathing when he smothers the pain with a kiss, thoughts dissolving into the air as you stare at the ceiling of his dorm, thinking you're never going to let this man go.
"Namjoo—" His mouth is on you before you can even finish your sentence, swallowing the words with a gentle press of his lips until yours fall apart. Kissing him might be one of your favourite activities ever. He feels good against your lips, ginger but sure in how he works you open, drawing sighs from your throat like he was born to do so. It’s easy to give in, your hips moving against his and your fingers dragging through his hair. It’s with a soft gasp that you part, the air around you electric. His brown eyes are dark but they gaze at you with an adoration that makes your heart swell. There are moments where you feel it on the tip of your tongue, a proclamation that yearns to spill out. But it’s too early to say anything like that yet. So you draw him closer instead, the content laugh that floats from his throat caught in your mouth. This kiss is different, more desperate, a hope that he understands what you mean heavy in your chest. You think he does because he kisses you back with an intent that leaves you breathless, a heady thing that has you arching into him before it peters out into tender little pecks. Your heart is so full it could explode.
And it does a second later when he drops a light kiss on your forehead, his wide hands settling on the backs of your thighs as he presses himself further into you. You know he feels the slick drenching your underwear by the hitch in his breath.
“Study break?” He offers, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes that ensnares you. A danger that glows like stars adorning a velvet sky.
“Namjoon,” you groan in response, legs wrapping around his waist. You can feel the length of him, hard and twitching against you. “You can’t just do that! It’s not fair.”
“Why? You don’t want me to fuck you?” There’s a nudge that coaxes another slip from your core. The whine that leaves your lips is instinctual.
“I do! It’s just that — um — just that I’m ovulating right now.”
The second the word leaves your mouth he freezes, broad body suspended over you and a distant look sweeping over his honey eyes. And then something clicks, his cock settling further into you, a twitch along his length that echoes in your nerves.
“Right now?” The words that leave his mouth are measured, his gaze locking on your own as if he’s weighing the consequences of his desires.
“Yes, right now. I don’t know if we—”
“Can I be honest with you? I haven’t been able to focus since you came over and the idea of you ovulating is doing nothing but making me extremely hard right now.”
“I — what? Really? Are you serious?”
He nods, unabashed as the blush rising beneath his golden skin. Your fingers dig further into his back, the want that sweeps through your system feral. It's so swift that you can’t control the rise of your hips nor the warmth that pools in your gut. Namjoon dissolves right back into you, the groan that slips from his mouth meeting the heat of your skin as he burrows himself back into the crook of your neck. You’re no longer thinking, your brain stuck on the feeling of his cock against you, direct with every drag of his hips.  He wants this as much as you do, a realisation that you’re still trying to comprehend. You have to ask again, terrified of the teetering edge you’re on.
“You sure? Like really?”
He scoffs, shifting back to give you a look. “You’ve seen my NSFW twitter, baby. You know what’s there.”
“Yeah, a lot more fisting porn than I ever expected.” There’s a beat of silence, Namjoon’s gaze shifting into something you can’t decipher. “Not that I’m against fisting,” you quickly amend, “It was just surprising.”
“Fair enough, but that wasn’t the only thing there.”
You know what he's referring to but seeing other people commit the act and then doing it yourself were too completely different things. There are still some things you’re too ashamed to say out loud and that particular kink of one of them. While your ovulation had a rather stronghold over you, so did your inner mortification.
Namjoon, on the other hand, cannot be bothered to beat around the bush. “You’ve seen what’s there right?" He repeats. "Creampies? Cum play? Breeding—”
“Don’t say that!”
He pauses, a playful grin tugging at his lips.”Is that what you want? Because you’re ovulating? What me to stuff—”
“Namjoon, stop it!”
He laughs then, a low sound dangerous that fills the room and swallows the embarrassment that eats away at you alive. “How can I? My pretty girl wants me to breed her, stuff her full of cum until it’s leaking from her cunt. You want that right? Want my cock so deep you feel it tomorrow? Am I right, baby? Hmm?”
You’re not looking at him, cheeks burning with every word parting his lips, but your cunt agrees wholeheartedly, leaking against your panties at the thought of Namjoon fucking you full. He doesn’t take your silence well though, a firm hand clasping around your jaw and tugging your focus right back into him. There's a glint in his eyes, a sharp dark wild thing.
“Baby.” He says it slowly, the word tumbling from his lips and right into the heat forming in your core. “Is that what you want?”
“Maybe,” you retort, feeling the twitch that tremors through his jaw deep inside of you. Namjoon scoffs, hand dropping from your chin. The absence of his touch has you scrambling after it, the movement occurring before you can bite back your desperation.
“Maybe? Then you don’t want it enough do you? I should leave you to study, don’t you think?”
“Namjoon.” Your fingers grip into his shirt before he can shift away, a pounding in your chest that terrifies you. “Maybe I do want it  — a lot — I just can't say it.”
“You can’t say it?” He cocks an eyebrow. “But you know how to use your words when you’re arguing with me.”
He’s infuriating and he’s doing it on purpose from the telltale gleam in his eyes. You don’t know what to despise more; Namjoon and his provocations or your inability to vocalise your desires. But that anger withers into wanting the second he settles back between your thighs, cock hard and heavy where you need him most. Yet, still, saying it out loud isn’t possible for you just yet. But you do want it, a great deal more than you’d ever admit.
“That’s different,” you say instead. “That’s when you’re being stupid.”
The eye-roll you're granted is brimming with exasperation. “Of course, you would say that.”
“And I’m correct.”
“Sure, you are,” Namjoon returns, nuzzling into your chest. He’s saying it to complacent you and it ticks you off
“Why wouldn’t I be?” You ask, a warning in your voice.
Namjoon sighs, perfect face burrowed between your boobs. “I’m not arguing with you right now. You look cute when you get mad and I’m hard enough as it. Besides, that’s not the point.”
That should not have you buzzing, the word cute sticking out from the rest of his horrid statement like a neon light in the dark. But you let it rest, preoccupied with the fact that:
a. Namjoon is horny
b. So are you
“So,” you say. “What was the point?”
“The point is that you’re too shy to say you want me to stuff you—”
Point B no longer exists. You are no longer horny even when he’s looking at you like that with that stupid lopsided grin of his.
“I get it,” you retort, “I get the point. And I’m not saying that. Not today, not ever.”
“Oh? Are you sure about that?” There’s a challenge there, and like an idiot you fall for it, raising an indignant eyebrow in response.
“Yes, I will not—”
He’s got the band of your sweatpants down in a second, wiggling the fabric down your hips and past your butt faster than you can blink. You don’t object, a muffled giggle drifting from your throat when he finally gets them off, tossing the pants somewhere in the corner of his room, something to be searched for later, not now. That giggle shifts to a moan the second his face dives between your thighs, the deep breath he takes in kindling a flame in your gut. There’s the faint press of his tongue through the cotton of your underwear, the low groan he lets out when he feels the wetness seeping through your panties setting something off within you.
“Oh — oh — N-Namjoon!”
“Yes, baby?” Another lick, tongue quick and firm against your drenched core.
“Don’t play with me. I can’t handle that right now.”
“I’m not playing,” he remarks. “Just giving you a reason to say you want me to stuff you full of my cum. I know you want to say it anyway.”
You huff. “You think I’ll give in that easi — hgnh.” He’s tearing your underwear off, tongue landing back onto your wet folds before you can register the fact that the fabric is gone. A few firm wet laves of that muscle against your cunt and you can see your resolve crumbling. He knows exactly where to lick and drag his tongue, nose buried into the apex of your cunt as if he wants to breathe you in. You can’t help the buck of your hips, a tremor running down your thighs when his tongue slips into your hole, pressing in with purpose and leaving you breathless in his sheets. But then he’s drawing away and you glance down to find him staring at your cunt in wonder, his rouge mouth glistening with your slick.
“How can I not,” Namjoon says, offering a kitten lick that spikes a shock in your spine, “Play with you when you’re so fun to play with, angel.” The smile on his lips is dangerous.
Your hand settles on his head and Namjoon curls into it. But instead of dragging your fingernails against his skull and pulling him closer like you know he loves, you shove him away, swiftly squeezing your thighs shut. If you’re going to play this game, you’re doing it on your terms.
“You’re not being fair,” you say. Namjoon blinks at you like you’re insane, obviously thinking with the dick in his pants rather than his head. “Go back to your Isaac Turganife or whatever.”
“It’s Ivan Turgenev, baby,” he replies, sighing slow. “And I don’t want to go? Do you really want me to?” He plants a tender kiss on your bare thigh and you burst with want, slick leaking out even though you didn’t intend it to.
“Not fair,” you say again. But you don’t want him to leave you like this, at the mercy of your hormones and the sudden remembrance of Namjoon’s thick cock stretching you open. “But no, I don’t want you to go. Just don’t play with me please.”
“Okay, that’s fine. But if we’re being honest here all I can think about is seeing my cum leak out of you. I just want you to want that as much as I do.” He says it in a rush like he’s afraid he won’t have the nerve to admit it if he doesn’t do it right now.
But I do, you think, walls fluttering just from the flash of that image in your mind. I do, Namjoon. And yet, you can’t say it.
“I’m ovulating, Namjoon,” you retort instead.
“And you’re also on birth control,” he rebuttals. “PEMDAS or whatever. It cancels out the baby option, right?”
“You are so dumb it hurts, Kim Namjoon,” you murmur, fighting the urge to kiss your stupid boyfriend. It’s a very odd conversation to be having when your cunt is on display and his dick is hard in his pants but you’re having it anyway.
“We’ve fucked raw before though?” He continues, still not piecing it together. “And so far, no baby. So no problem right?”
“When I’m not ovulating. Less risk, at least that’s what I like to believe.”
“Well I suggest you start believing that right now because I would very much like to see you stu—”
“Stop saying that you’re making me want to turn celibate!”
“Oh?” Namjoon remarks. “And yet you’re leaking all over my sheets every time I mention it.”
“I will cut you off from sex for a week if you say something like that again,” you retort.
Namjoon grins like he knows this is affecting you on a deeper level than your cunt being wet. “Fair enough, but I have to ask. Do you want that?”
“Want what?” Feigning ignorance is the safest bet until that shift in his eyes appears.
“Want my cum?” he says it so easily, unaffected while your face rushes with heat.“Inside of you, leaking out of you… All of it?”
And maybe you stop breathing at the thought of feeling full of everything Namjoon had to offer you, your walls clenching tight.
“Maybe. Maybe I do, I don’t know.” You do know and Namjoon knows that you do too. It’s with a defeated murmur that you admit it, voice soft in his room. “Okay, fine. I do. I want that.”
“You do?” There’s an edge in his voice. “You want me to bre—”
“Stop it before I change my mind.”
He laughs, a light warm thing that digs into your chest. “Okay, okay! Sorry, babe. Do you want me to prep you? My mouth? My fingers? You can decide.”
It’s settled so quick in your brain you realise it was never up for debate. “Neither. Just you. I just want you.”
He halts, honey eyes locked on yours for a moment, before springing to his feet and tugging his shirt over his head with speed. “We can do that,” he mumbles, his knees bumping against the foot of his bed. His pants come off next, plummeting to the ground where he kicks them off a moment later. It’s only then that you see the consequence of actions, straining painfully against his boxer briefs. He shifts to tug those off too but you cut the movement before it happens, shuffling forward until your hand is cupped around his length. Namjoon doesn’t protest, rolling into the tiny palm of your hand. You love the way he feels underneath your palm, thick and hard and heavy, a weight you long to feel inside of you. He sighs low when you grip him, watching your fingers wrap around the outline of his dick through the fabric. It’s only then that you realise, your gaze slipping down his body, subtly noting the sharp intake of breath when your lips mimic what he did to your underwear before he ripped it off, that Namjoon has been holding himself back.
He wants this, badly. It’s evident from the tightness in his voice when he speaks a moment later.
“Angel,” It’s said low, a warning. “I thought we said we wouldn’t play with each other.”
He’s right. With a small pout, you lean away and Namjoon wastes no time moving into your space, strong arms swapping your arm just to land you back at the head of his bed. You suddenly remember your laptop, lost in the mess of his sheets. Namjoon is kind enough to relocate it before climbing right back into your space, cock digging into your stomach when he kisses you again. It doesn’t take long before your top is gone, joining Namjoon’s pants on the floor, and then you’re digging the band of his underwear down, your lips still slotted together and a wetness rapidly forming between your thighs at the feel of his bare cock against you.
But he’s impatient, shuffling you around the second his length is freed. Your back is hard against his mattress, fingers grasping at the sheets when Namjoon knocks your knees apart. There’s a moment of bated breath, his large hands lingering against the bare skin of your exposed thigh, brown eyes locked on your wet folds. His gaze is so intense you instinctively want to clamp your legs shut, shy away from how seen you feel under his eyes. Yes, technically you were naked in his bed but there’s something else that he draws out just from looking at you. Something that makes you nervous because you like it so much.
“Don’t hide from me.” It’s whispered in the heat of the air, Namjoon picking up on how your legs drift together. He’s got them pressed apart a second later, grip firm but gentle, and your stomach does a swoop so dangerous you’re left violently reeling, the ceiling above you spinning. “Don’t do that, angel. Too pretty to hide from me. I want to see all of you.”
You can only hum in response, throat clogged with words that won’t form into coherent sounds. But Namjoon understands you regardless, kissing you senseless as his massive body descends on yours. His hands are on your ass a second later, gripping tight as his length nudges against your core. You just might cry, desperation bubbling in your chest. He draws away gently but you don’t want to let him leave, fingers taut on his broad back, gripping onto the very muscles that had you heady just earlier today. There’s a whine on your tongue that he swallows before you part once more. The laugh that slips from his lips at the sight of your pouted mouth is fond. He grants you another peck, soft and tender, before Namjoon rips himself away, determined this time.
His hips are lined against yours a moment later, cock stiff and dripping with precum. And yet your gaze doesn’t tear from the arms trapping you in his sheets. His biceps look huge, massive actually, all hard muscle and pure strength. It’s doing something to the base part of your brain because you can’t stop thinking about how large Namjoon is. Caving you in, your personal shelter from the world. Is it weird that you feel protected? Safe in the bed of this boy. You wouldn’t mind hiding here forever. A part of you wants to kiss him again, but Namjoon’s focused on other things, oblivious to the cave-woman looking for a mate thoughts running amok in your brain.
They dissipate the moment the head of his cock nudges at your entrance. Just a light tease, but he splits you open quick enough.
“Fuck, you’re so wet, angel. Didn’t need me to prep you at all.”
You mumble a noise that you’re not sure leaves your throat. He’s taking it slow on purpose, pushing in inch by inch so that you feel every part of him filling you up. It’s intoxicating, how the feeling of the slow drag of his cock overtakes everything in your brain. You’ll never get over how big Namjoon is, no matter how many times he fucks you. Each shift of his hips forward coaxing slick from your cunt. It pools at your entrance, dripping over his length until he’s glistening with your wetness.
“F-fuck,” He head drops down to the hollow of your neck the moment he’s sheathed inside, the velvet walls of your pussy gripping him hard. It’s too much for the both of you, bodies strung high on the want that threatened to consume you both. But he feels good like this, lodged in your cunt, stretching you wide and making a place for himself right between your legs. He gives you a moment to adjust and then the coiled spring in him snaps.
“So fucking tight around me, angel. Taking my cock so well.” There’s an edge in his voice, a warning for what’s to come.
You groan when he draws up, a tiny squeal erupting from your throat when he slams back down, hips angled to piston you into his sheets. The pounding is hard and unforgiving, a contradiction to the gentle look in his gaze. He holds you tight, giving you no room to shuffle under the bruise of his thrusts.
You can’t do anything but mumble his name, tongue numb in your mouth as he fucks you senseless.
“You’re dripping so much, baby. Making a mess on the sheets. You wanted my dick that bad, huh? Wanted me to fuck you full? Stuff this dirty cunt of yours?”
“J-Joon!” There’s an arch in your back, a dangerous tingle fluxing through your nerves when his mouth latches on your neck, your chests pressed against each other. Each drive into you pushes out a haggard breath, the heat into the room wrapping around your joint bodies, your arms slung over his shoulders, gripping him tight as he unravels you with his cock. Time stops, nothing punctuating the moment apart from the lewd sound of your meeting, your slick slipping from your cunt each time he hits deep. And he keeps at it, fucking you with a vigour that feels new and vicious.
You can feel him tensing beneath your fingertips, a soreness spreading through your muscles with every hard thrust of his hips into you. But you don’t care, delirious with the feeling of his cock deep within you, slamming right into that spot that has you dangling off the edge. The tight grip on your thighs adds to it, Namjoon pressing you down as he fucks you open like you’re nothing but a toy for his pleasure. He slams into you with abandon, his lips on your neck. Every drag is loud in the room, the slick pooling around your entrance orchestrating the sound of your meeting. You love how he feels over you, broad and big and pinning you down with an ease that shouldn't have you stomach twisting but it does. And he knows that, reading the whimpers that leave your throat well. You can feel it, the knot that tightens with every hard drive of him into you. So close, a blink of your eyes and you could be there. But then he slows, cock squelching against your entrance with a half-hearted thrust.
“Namjoon—" You’re burning, fingers scrambling to push his hips down, shove your hips up. Anything. Anything because if he gives you nothing you’ll implode.
“My baby is so quiet today. Hmm? Why are you so quiet? You don’t want my cum? Don’t want me to breed this tight little cunt of yours?” There’s a  in his tension colouring his deep voice, like he’s holding back from saying something. You want to ask but your needs are forefront in your mind clamouring for attention.
“Joon!” He nips your neck at that whine and you dissolve into his sheets, nothing but pleasure running through your limbs. “Namjoon please, please, please. I want it, Joon, need it.”
He cocks his head, a languid roll into your core that has you squirming underneath his hold. “Need what? Words baby, words.”
“Need your cum.” It’s shameful to say and the heat in your cheeks makes it obvious, Namjoon doesn’t care, shifting his hips so that his cock slowly slips out. Your legs clamp around him so quick that his chest smacks into yours, a muffled sigh escaping into the air.
“Need it where?” He says, hips rigid with how he holds himself back. It takes tenacity to make you work for it. You feel perfect around him, tight pussy stretched around his length and your slick dripping all over. So needy, so wet, velvet walls clinging to his cock leaving him weak even though he tries to hide it. You’re intoxicating, your heat, the feeling of your body moulded into his, the way you moan his name. He wants to hear you scream it though, hear your throat go hoarse with each cry until you're a blubbering mess in his bed. There are other things he wants too, but he needs to hear you say this first.
“Inside,” you reply, a perfect whimper drifting from your bruised lips. “Inside me, Namjoon, please.”
He gives in then and there, resolve shattering when his gaze drifts to the minuscule grind of your hips against his own, his cock sinking deep with every shift of your waist upward. It’s not long until he’s sheathed back inside of you, length twitching against the heat of your walls. He wants to take it slow, make you beg for him a little more, but there’s a weight in his gut that threatens to drop. And then his focus shifts to the span of your stomach and it slams into him so quick he nearly chokes. He may joke about it as a kink, the idea of fucking you until you were bearing his child, but the actual vision of your stomach swelling hadn’t occurred in his thoughts until right then. You would look ethereal, round with evidence of his love for you. He can’t help the palm that settles there as his hips slowly rut forward, forcing himself deeper, needing to see you stretch out for him.
“Joon,” you sigh, shuddering at the press of his balls against your ass.
He hums, thoughtful, dark eyes lingering on the sway of your chest. “Yes, baby?”
“Harder, please, harder.”
“Anything my baby wants, she gets. Isn’t that right, princess.” And then he’s falling out of you, quick when he slams back down. Your voice sounds foreign to your eyes, brain roughly registering the harsh feeling of his hands as he swiftly rearranges you, cock still buried deep, until your knees are folded over his broad shoulders. The quake in your thighs is violent. But you don’t protest, mind unable to shift from the hard pistons he delivers into your cunt, thrusts demanding your release. There’s the sway of the bed beneath you, soft sheets bundling underneath the weight of your joint bodies, a heaviness in the air you breathe. He fucks you with a purpose that wasn’t there before, as if he needs to see you stuffed with his cum, unravelling around his length, a mess beneath him.
And you give it to him, shuddering when his fingertips sneak to your clit, the flickers he lands there unfaltering. That combined with the steady drag of his cock has your vision blanking, contentment spilling through your nerves as your high hits. It’s quick; a hard fast thing and spreads right from your core and through your system. Namjoon fucks you through it, swallowing your incoherent mumbling with a deft press of his lips against yours. You don’t realise you’re crying until he swipes a thumb along your cheeks, dropping a kiss on the damp skin of your face.
“You’re so pretty,” he murmurs. You don’t miss how his hips speed up, muscles tense underneath your trembling fingertips. “So pretty. My pretty girl.”
“Cum in me,” you reply, breaking away to catch his gaze. Namjoon chokes, hips faltering. You don’t let him process it, still riding high on the look colouring his features. This is what he wanted from you, and you’re drunk enough on the feeling of him deep inside of you to say it. There’s still a tremor in your walls that grips him tight and you aid it by raising your hips upwards, the bend uncomfortable but worth the darkness that consumes the brown of his eyes. A part of you wants to say it again and you do, voice low in the room. “Joon, I need you. Need to feel full.”
“Fuck me.” It’s said under his breath but you don’t miss it, stomach twisting when his cock slams into you. It’s hard and mean. Namjoon takes everything you’re giving him, folding you into his mattress and driving his hips hard enough for the bed-frame to shift, a low thud against his bedroom wall. You let him have his way, groaning into his ear, the sheen of sweat that builds on both your bare bodies glimmering under the dwindling glow of the sunlight. There’s a faint tepid heat flickering in your core and it sparks up when Namjoon lands a hard kiss on the span of your neck, moaning low as he splits you open on his cock.
“So fucking tight.” There’s a hitch in your rugged breathing, your grip on his ruined sheets fierce. “So wet. All for me. All mine. Right, baby? This is mine, isn’t it?”
“Yours,” you whisper in return, lost in the feeling of him enclosing you in. “All yours.”
His lips are soft against your own, a delicate press of his mouth that doesn’t match how hard he’s fucking you. But you revel in it, rupturing into something bright and wild and full of love underneath the piston of his hips. It’s good now, the sensitivity you felt a moment ago ebbing into nothing but heat and want. You don’t miss how he twitches against your walls, thrusts growing erratic with every lewd slam of his length inside of you. And you want it, reminding Namjoon of that fact with wicked whispers in his ear. He caves fast, a few last hard rolls before he paints your walls in his release, the moan he lets out bleeding into your skin. You’re on edge now, the feeling of Namjoon’s cum coating your cunt when you’re at peak fertility doing something stupid to your brain. It shouldn’t turn you on — in fact you should be terrified. You weren’t ready to be a parent, yet the weight of him on you, the spurt of cum that slips from your cunt when he draws again, sends your spiralling. It’s swift, the swing of your legs back around his waist.
“No — don’t, don’t move. Not yet.”
Namjoon pauses, checks still warm and his skin a pretty golden rouge. You don’t enjoy the way he reads you.
“We can’t cuddle like this. Remember what we did last time? The cockwarming?” He suggests it easily. He gets what this is doing to you even when you don’t understand it at all. You nod because the idea of Namjoon not lodged inside you sounds abhorrent. He shifts the both of you quick enough, his softening dick back to half-mast the moment your protest emerged. It’s easier like this, with you sprawled on his broad chest. You don’t want to acknowledge it but you’re still somewhat wound up and the feeling of him holding you close, your cunt stuffed full of his cum, is doing unimaginable things to your brain. You pretend it isn’t, snuggling into the valley of his massive chest, feeling safe and secure. And then Namjoon opens his mouth.
“We’re going to have to talk about this. You know that right?”
“No, we don’t have to talk about it. Ever. Pretend this never happened.”
His laughs echoes in your heart. “Baby, I just came in you and you’re ovulating. That’s fairly risky, don’t you think?”
“I told you!” You whack his arm for good measure. “I told you it was dumb.”
“But I liked it,” Namjoon continues, staring intently at the ceiling. “A lot.” You flutter, cheeks hot at his admission, a bubbling in your chest that shouldn’t be there. “And judging from how you’re using my dick to keep my cum inside of you, I’m guessing you liked it too.”
“...Maybe.” You hate it but he’s right. You liked having him use you like that, the prospect of his cum doing more than leaving you euphoric with satisfaction lingering in the depths of your mind.
“Maybe?” He scoffs, wide hand gently pushing you off his chest despite the whine you release. “Get off then, I need to check if my dick is intact. I think I saw the fifth dimension when I came.”
“Shut up, please!” You cling to your boyfriend, viciously wiggling around until you feel him twitch inside of you. It’s too nice of a feeling to lose just yet. “Why are you ruining it?”
“Why can’t you admit what you’re into? Speaking of that subject, I don’t know what your kinks really are. So far there’s been a bit more exhibitionism than I expected from you but the breeding one… is different. Not bad. Just different,” he suddenly rambles.
“Because it’s embarrassing.” Your voice is small, landing on his naked chest in the silence of his room. His hand shifts from shoving you off to gingerly resting on you back, rough fingertips languidly tracing patterns on your skin. The motion is reassuring, yet you can still hear the eye roll in his voice when he speaks.
“You’ve seen the fisting porn on my NSFW twitter, what the hell do you mean embarrassing?”
“It just is!” You protest. “I’m not sure what I’m into.”
“I think you are, you’re just not comfortable admitting it to yourself. Don’t you watch porn? Or have any particular fantasies?” Namjoon’s persistent despite your deflection and while some part of you hates it, you know he’s right. He always is — well most of the time.
“I do,” you retort instead, refusing to give him an ounce of triumph. “You know that don’t be dumb.”
“Well then,” Namjoon returns, curiosity colouring his voice, “What’s your NSFW twitter? I’ve shown you mine, let me see yours.”
“I don’t have one…”
There’s a pause, the hand on your back drawing to a halt. You can hear the cogs in his head turning.
“You don’t? What do you use then?”
“...Yours,” you whisper. The breath that falls from his lips is horrified. “I like most of the stuff you like,” you quickly tack on. Somehow this is more shameful than admitting that you like being stuffed with Namjoon’s cum. The silence carries on and you're left stewing in your thoughts, looking for a way out of this awkward mess when Namjoon starts up again, a tentativeness in his tone that concerns you.
“Most of what I like,” he says. Another pause. “... Including the fisting porn?”
“Namjoon,” you snap, “Shut up.” You can’t believe you’re allowing this man to plug his dick in you after sex, can’t believe it at all. It’s a horrible realisation to come too especially when he breaks out into a loud laugh, his chest shuffling you around with every quick intake of air and the sound of his glee resounding in your heart.
“Sorry, angel,” he offers between muffled laughs. You hate him. You do even if you love him ten times more than you hate him. “We should make you one after this,” Namjoon says. “And then get food. Sounds good with you?”
“Food first,” you retort, mellow in the arms of your lover. “And then the Twitter porn.”
543 notes · View notes
b0ba-chan · 4 years
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Good Puppy
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summary: won’t you be a good puppy for daddy?
pairing: Bokuto Koutaro x fem!Reader
word count: 1700
warnings: dom/sub dynamic, daddy kink, puppy kink (not in a furry way tho), spanking, car sex (if you squint), pure filth, no editing
a/n: my fingies went WILD omg she just kept going. so close to 2000 words but that would’ve been a little too much. Also, again i do not know how to write endings
⭑・゚゚・*:༅。.。༅:*゚:*:✼✿  ✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
Bokuto Koutaro seems like a giant golden retriever to the public, with his bright eyes and even brighter personality. Everyone loved him no matter the age or gender, his warm and loving energy could draw anyone in. That’s how he was able to draw you into him. Being with him feels like whirlwind, constant moving and acceleration in both life and relationship. There is never a dry or boring time with Bokuto, he always made everything so fun.
People may think that he would prefer to be more submissive in bed the way he loves to please people or he would be more light hearted with everything. You thought the same way too, that there will always be that light hearted vibe to always linger around. What you weren’t prepared for was the fact that he has an extremely dominating presence and quite serious. Not only was his vibe felt so big, but he’s just built so well with his thick muscles and towering height, it just makes you feel even smaller than you already are.
Today has been a rough day for you, a busy day at work and an angry boss that you had to deal with which almost cost you your job. You felt so tired and overworked that you could barely walk back home, but luckily for you, your loving boyfriend is on his way back from training to pick you up. Parked out at the front, he leans on the car waiting for you to come out. Right when he was about to text you he was there to pick you up, your small body plopped against his broad chest. You inhale his scent that made you feel like home and melt into him as he wrapped his arms around you?
“Alright, pup?” Koutaro coos at you and runs a hand through your hair, kissing the top of your head. Letting out a small whine and press as close as you can to him.
“Go home, daddy?” You couldn’t help whispering out the little nickname that could change his attitude in a snap. His eyes grew dark and lust filled, but he kept his composure for you, because he knew you needed him the most right now.
“Yeah, let's get you home. Daddy will take care of you,” Kou smiles and opens the passenger door for you. His gym shorts are already straining slightly, knowing he can have his fun with you tonight. On days like these, he knows you want him to take all the reins and wreck her to forget today’s troubles. 
The drive home was quiet, making you feel more ansty for more touch than his hand on your thigh. You needed more and his hand did not have enough access to your pussy, but you do have easy access to his crotch. All you had to do to get to him was reach over and tug the shorts down, so you do as you think, letting your hand reach over. He glances back and forth from the road to you, sending you over a warning glare.
“Puppy, keep to yourself. It’s dangerous, wait till we get home,” Bokuto grunts as your hand reaches to pull down his shorts and boxers, just enough for his semi-hard on to come out. He hisses at the cold air, but he doesn’t stop you. His rule is that you have to listen to him the first time around, never wanting to repeat himself. So if you don’t want to listen, he’ll let you have your fun but punishment does wait for you at home. 
You hum at the weight in your hand and tease the tip with your thumb, lightly giggling when his breath hitches. There was a punishment to this and you knew full well that you’re bound to get a punishment, but anything for you to have your hands on him. You have your fun, jerking him off slowly and taking in the feeling of him getting hard in your hand. The car parks, but that doesn’t stop you from playing with his cock until he pulls his shorts up, causing you to let out a whine.
Kou doesn’t say anything but gets out of the car and goes to your side to open the door for you to get out. Before you can walk away, he grabs you by the jaw and leans in to your ear. He blows gently, causing you to emit a whine and shiver. “Get inside and get naked. Face down, ass up. Understand, pup?”
After you nod, he lets a low chuckle and lets go of your jaw to pat your cheek. A flush runs through your whole body as you go into the house and to the bedroom, getting in position the way he asked you to. It feels like forever until he comes back, strolling in with only his briefs on and hair ruffled down from it’s normal brushed up style. Trying to tempt him close, you shake your ass for him, but he acts unphased which causes you to pout. Maybe deepening your arch for him? No, he seems like he doesn’t care.
You close your eyes to let out a frustrated whine, but before you can continue any longer, a sharp slap hits your ass. It’s so hard and aggressive that it causes you to lurch forward and gasp. The stinging was burning, but before it settled down, another spank landed on the same spot. Tears are already threatening to spill out as the blows to your ass keep going. You loved spanking, but this wasn’t enough contact with him to satisfy you. Bokuto knew this as well, that all you wanted to touch him. After fifteen spanks, he easily flips you onto your back to take in your already fucked out expression. He smirks, enjoying his work, but right as you reach out to him, he immediately pins you down to the bed by the wrist.
“No touching, pup. You’re still taking your punishment,” His eyes stare directly into yours, showing that he’s completely serious. You let out a little whine, but comply anyways. Punishments were rough but you never want them to worsen. “Don’t worry your pretty little head, puppy. Daddy will take good care of you.”
Shivering at his words, you nod compliantly because you know daddy always takes care of you. He lets go of your wrist and lets it trail down your face to your chest, grazing his fingers lightly over your perky nipples. The light huffs and whines arouse him even more and brings his hand down to your sobbing cunt. The pad of his thumb presses on your clit causing you to let out a groan. Your hips roll down on his thumb, trying to grab more pleasure. Why was he being so mean? Wasn’t it enough that you can’t touch him?
“Maybe daddy shouldn’t prep you. Think you can take all of my cock with no prep baby? Be a good girl and take it, yeah,” He smirks at the pleased reaction from you. It’s not like you haven’t taken him with no prep before, but it was rare and you’re willing to take the challenge now. You let out small pleas for him, not really specifying what you want, but Bokuto knows you well enough to know what you want.
One of his hands reaches up to grab the headboard and the other holds the base of cock. He angles himself to your hole and pushes his blunt tip into you. The intrusion causes you to let out a squeal and try to hold onto the sheets to stable yourself. Koutaro doesn’t waste his time to continue pushing into you; you just looked so small and fragile under him, he just had to ruin you. Even when you plea for him to slow down, he doesn’t listen and continues until he’s balls deep. 
You keep squirming around and crying over the intense pain and pleasure of the stretch of his thick cock. He pinches your side to get you to calm down. “C’mon, puppy. Relax for me.” He chuckles at you trying to gather yourself. His hand comes to your tummy and presses down, moaning at the pressure he set on himself. Sobs wrack through your whole body, feeling him so deep in you.
“Doesn’t it feel so good around daddy’s cock? C’mon, calm down,” Kou lets out a grunt as he adds a little more pressure. As you start to calm down, he shocks you by starting to pound into your cunt. Both of his hands are on the headboard, limiting his skin contact with you, still keeping to his punishment. But you don’t even care anymore, you’re fucked dumb and can’t even form coherent sentences. Words spill out of your mouth about how good Bokuto feels inside you, babbling about needing more.
“Puppy just can’t shut up, huh?” The man towering over you grunts, taking one of his hands to prod his fingers in your mouth, keeping his brutal pace at your sloppy hole. He holds your tongue between his thumb and index finger and increases his pace. Distorted moans spill out of your mouth as your legs start to shake, signaling your oncoming orgasm. He slows down his thrusts but gets deeper every time. 
Once his tip presses against your cervix, screams break through your mouth as you fall over the edge, crying over the intense feeling. Your eyes roll back as your sight goes white. Bo moves both hands back to your hips to your hips to pull you as close he can to spill his hot seed into you. 
The only words coming out of your mouth are daddy and different variations of his name. As you both slowly come down, Bokuto stays in your hole and pulls you to his chest. He soothes your crying and praises you for being such a good girl for him.
“That’s my good puppy, there we go. Did so good for me, princess,” He coos into your ear, letting you touch him however you wanted. “Been so good for me, baby. C’mon let's get you cleaned up, drink some water too, yeah?” 
⭑・゚゚・*:༅。.。༅:*゚:*:✼✿  ✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
a/n: thanks for reading  (´。• ᵕ •。`) ♡
566 notes · View notes
le4ftea · 3 years
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Don't look! Pt.2 IzukuxMale!ReaderxKatsuki
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Smut, bakudeku(cuz why not.), blow job, tears,creampie.
This is part two of "Don't look!" This is for a male reader. It has highschool Bakugou and Izuku, and middle school Bakugou and Izuku. Hope its good. PS: when it says there last name, it means younger bakugou and Midoriya. Also ill just call the older ones by their first name.
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"Oooh Fuck! I'm-I'm CUMMINGS! God cuMMing~!" The green haired boy screamed out in pleasure, his head thrown back as his hips stayed balls deep into your soft insides. His body trembled as his intense orgasm made his vision white.
You had let go of the bed sheets, your upper body laying on the bed as your ass was up and spilling Baby Dekus seed. The boy had pulled out yet his dick as still spilling white liquid from his swollen slit.
Still moaning. His childhood friend was staring at him with a burning intensity.
Baby Bakugou was confused to why watching Deku spill cum from his dick, turned him on the same as you begging to be fucked did.
You slowly sat up, whining at the emptiness you felt.
"Now its my turn to show you a good time." Kastuki smirked down at your quivering state. Your eyes looking up at him like you were a puppy begging for food.
He unbucked his green pants and pulled his underwear down, his dick stood infront of you. His tip red and precum beaded at the slit.
You wanted to taste it. Saveur the flavor and drink his warm cum, feeling your stomach warm up. You grabbed it and took it all in your mouth till it was deep in your throat, eyes rolling to the back of your head as a long moan rumbled around his cock.
He groaned letting a shaky curse escape his lips.
Izuku covered his mouth at the sight of you sucking his friend with pure delight. His dick getting hard once more, he bit his lip to keep a moan from being heard.
While the two older boys fonded over you, the two younger ones had plans of their own.
Baby Deku was still panting, a dark blush covering his freckles cheeks as the adorable tears pricked in his eyes.
Baby Bakugou had moved in front of Deku and slowly leaned into his gasping lips, placing a passionate kiss onto them. Causing Deku to come down from his high. Slowly melting into his touch.
Bakugou started to gently stroke Dekus dick, drawing muffled moans to be heard. Deku weakly tried to push is arm away from his sensitive cock, yet had no energy to put more effort.
You had been sucking harder and harder on Katsuki cock, yet you wanted more. You need more.
Releasing his cock with a wet pop and string of saliva, twitching with want. He looked down at you annoyed yet caring, since he did love you for years on end and dreamed of this day to come.
You looked at Izuku, wiggling your ass to his direction. Eyes pooled with lust and body shivering with excitement, you started to beg.
"Izu-kun. P-Please nha.. fuck me.." your voice was a rough yet a silky song to his blessed ears, his size leveled up at the simple demand.
Swallowing his spit, he nodded in a shy manner. Slowly placing himself behind you and digging in his pants to pull himself out. Until he felt a rise of jealousy as he saw how lovely Katsuki felt as you devoured his throbbing cock.
He glanced up at him, signaling his classmate that he would like to switch spots.
Chuckling while shaking his head, completely confused to why he would want your mouth( not saying you don't give good head.) Instead of your preciously silk tight walls that would suck you back in for more.
Not complaining you watched them change spots, either way you would be sucking someone off and being filled with a nice firm dick. When the two placed themselves at your wholes.
Eyes half closed and tongue hanging out to let room for Izuku, you could sense his desire just based of his heavy breathing. His face already dripping with sweat and a heated blush coloring his soft cheeks.
He gently placed the tip on your tongue, shivering at the sudden wetness and hot air coming from your soft puffy lips.
Katsuki stroked his wet cock a couple of times as he glared at the whole that was clenching itself every once in awhile. Clicking his tongue at the roof of his mouth he bubbled with glee. His vision already getting hazy as he only put the tip into your whole.
In one full move, Katsuki had shoved his cock into you, the sudden movement had forced the timid green hair male to have his cock inhaled in a matter of seconds. He squaled at the dripping hot cave that had a lovely muscle already swirling to taste him. Izuku unconsciously bucking into your mouth as his nerves sang in joy, his eyes dilated as he could only watch the roof. Bones heating up, and shock waves running through is brain in a fantastic way.
Katsuki moving in a mix of slow and faster pace to edge himself at every moment he could. Gripping your hips in place. He saw how your thighs shook with each thrust, cute moans that sent vibration to Izukus slimy dick.
Senses crying out, your mind was pulsing with bliss with every thrust and moan leaving the older boys mouths, sweet pain feeling like a message by the Gods in every quivering inch of your body. A cute virgin, now a hungry monster.
"Wait K-Kacchan! You can't just-!"
"Why not.. fuck you are just turning me on more you damn nerd! Just let me..." Bakugou and Midoriya had been busy as well, slowly finding out that they were also attracted to one another.
Bakugou had prepared Midoriya for his whining cock, that was begging to messy up his childhood friends insides. His face was turned to a lovingly kind yet toughness painting. He slowly pushed himself inside the green hairs boy.
Both moaning at the sudden feeling.
"F-fuck! Kacchan!" Midoriya cried out, blood running cold and hot at the stimulating shock.
The clenching and sucking of Midoriya's inside drove Bakugou wild. He found it werid how he wanted to also pretend he was inside of you but you and Midoriya found you both every attractive all of a sudden.
The two young boys stared into eachothers eyes with a spark they never saw before.
"Damn Deku... why do you look so hot.." Bakugou leaded into his friends soft lips, digging himself deeper into Midoriya.
A muffled moan is eating as Bakugou refused to pull back, roughly yet slowly thrusting in and out of his friend.
Moving to the three of you, Katsuki and Izuku seemed to sparkle with a change of heart. Izuku stared at Katsuki who pounded into your ass with no mercy. You legs twitching with each thrust and mind fuzzy with the taste of Izuku.
The two older males leaded in for eachothers Lips and kissed of the first time. Heat rising around them they sucked on eachothers tongues, their saliva dripping into your back.
Flinching and quivering you loved the sounds and smells, the feelings and the taste.
You were losing it. That fantastic bomb about to blow as is seemed everyone was getting louder and louder.
The two males shoving you with their dicks pulled away and told you they were about to cum.
"Oh! God I'm gonna cum in your MoUth! Oh God oh GOD!"
"Yea! Take my cum! Oh yea yea YEA NhA!"
You gripped izukus hips and pulled him deeper into your throat. While your legs wrapped around Katsuki and pulled him in deeper.
Screams and moans filled the room as it seemed that everyone came at the same time. A hot liquid filled your mouth and scarred hands gripped your hair as his hips weakly thrusted the rest in.
Katsuki and gripped your hips hard, you swore you were bruised as his dick throbbed and splashed his seed in you.
Little explosion are heard as a couple of groans fall from the two younger boys. Bakugou had lost control of his quirk but thank God he was gripping Dekus cloths.
Your vision was spotting with black as you had no feeling in your body.
Fainting in Izukus lap you were left with a lovely warm feeling. Darkness consuming you.
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"Hey (L/N)-kun!" Midoriya ran up to you as you walked side by side with Bakugou.
He blushed at the up coming male. His heart skipping a beat yet he did not know why.
You smile tiredly as you let out a yawn.
Only to whine in pain.
"Are you okay (L/N)-kun?" Midoriya asked worried.
Bakugou sighed in annoyances as he looked at Midoriya.
"His throat hurts. He doesn't know why but he is probably sick or something." He mumbled with he walked slightly ahead to hide his blush from the sight of both you and Midoriya.
You nod and whine when you swallow your spit.
Midoriya chated with you for a bit till he ran up to Bakugou asking him God knows what.
The two males in front did not know or remember the heated time they all shared.
But you for sure, remember every minute.
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0606-hyuck · 3 years
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a letter to my lover | na jaemin
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♡  dear y/n, i’m writing you this letter in the hopes that it gets to you well. our relationship has been tumultuous, that’s for sure, and i thought it was high time i wrote you a letter detailing all the times you said "i love you" that are important to me. 
genre: jaemin x reader, smut (only at the start), angst, R18 ONLY, supernatural!jaemin, incubus!jaemin
warnings: unprotected sex, toxic relationships, profanity, alcohol consumption, and mentions of drugs. jaemin is not a good person, and this is not a happy story.
disclaimer: this fic is in no way glorifying or romanticizing toxic behaviour/relationships. how jaemin is portrayed is not an accurate reflection of him as a person. readers must strictly be over 18 years old. please make your own judgement over whether or not this fic is right for you.
tagging: the lovely @roses-of-the-moon ♡ @mora134340 @ncteology + @nct-writers
word count: 2.3K
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Y/N,
The first time you said “I love you”, you were moaning underneath me.
You were just a Tinder hookup, or so I told myself. If I wasn’t gambling, getting into fights, or partying until the sun rose, I was swiping away on that goddamn app, matching with as many individuals as possible. The night I met you was no different. Your Tinder profile was pretty standard - ‘hi I’m Y/N and I’m not looking for anything serious, apart from a good chat and laughs.’ We matched with each other, I sent off a quick ‘hi beautiful, I’m Jaemin’, and within a few messages you were already putty in my waiting hands. 
We met at a bar, and I really wasn’t expecting you to look the way you did. I checked your pictures, of course, but at this point I was basically fucking anything that walked, so I hadn’t paid too much attention to what you looked like. I wonder if you knew the outfit you had so nicely prepared would be off your body and lying on my floor in a mere hour.
I wined and dined you like the fine gentleman I am, and we made the decision to travel to my place for some fun adult time. This routine was so familiar to me - go on a Tinder date, spend a little bit of money on the date, bring my Tinder match back home, have some hot sex, feed of off their energy, and then kick them out. 
That night, I had myself positioned in between your legs, my hips rolling like the tides and causing you to let out an attractive whine of ecstasy. You wrapped your arms around the back of my neck and pulled me closer, threading your fingers through my hair, and whispered in my ear, “oh god, I love you.” I smirked and didn’t think much of it - if I wasn’t sleeping with someone and they didn’t confess their love for me then I was clearly doing something wrong. 
The words continued to spill from your mouth as we both reached our highs; your fingers dug into my neck and the pain transformed into pleasure as I came inside you. As your own orgasm rushed over you, I leant down to kiss your lips - instead I sucked as much energy from your body as possible without causing you to fall unconscious.
You see, I was an incubus, and in order to live I fed off the sexual energy of my partners. I spent hours each week scrolling through Tinder finding matches so I could continue to exist, but I was also young and keen, and having sex multiple times a week was fun for me. Partying, drinking, and having sex was just part of my lifestyle as an incubus. It was a common rule for incubi to avoid forming attachments to those we slept with, because monogamy doesn’t really fit in well with our lifestyle, and that was a rule I was trying to abide by when I kicked you out of my apartment just minutes after I had fed from you. 
If only I realised how hard that rule would be to follow when you were involved. 
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The second time you said “I love you”, I said it back.
After we slept together, I broke my only rule: don’t get attached. You still had my number, and I had yours, and it became normal for us to meet up at night for a quick hookup. Whenever you had an argument with your partner-who-wasn’t-actually-your-partner, you’d call me. Whenever I felt the nagging effects of a lack of energy, I’d call you. 
It just made sense for us to be each other’s crutch, to use each other for our own selfish needs, to build a relationship around our mutual sexual frustrations. I didn’t become attached to you because I was fond of you. I became attached to you because I had this inherently primal desire to ruin you - to come through like a wrecking ball and destroy the life you had known before me.
Every Saturday I invited you to a local party a vague acquaintance of mine was hosting, so we could get drunk enough to have a quickie in a spare room and never speak of it again. Each Wednesday, we would go down to a local nightclub to do the exact same thing. I found myself ditching all my usual friends-with-benefits, and we fell into a daily routine we didn’t realise would be the end of us until it was too late: drink until we couldn’t walk, gamble until there was nothing left in our wallets, fuck until we physically couldn’t keep going, and repeat.
It was at one of these sex-filled parties that you told me you loved me for the second time. The penthouse belonged to a distant friend of mine, and we’d witnessed multiple hookups, drug deals, and fights before you pulled me out onto the balcony for some fresh air. We stood in silence together as we both watched the bright lights of the city spread into the distance and took in the sounds of a restless society. 
Our shoulders were only mere inches apart - a poignant symbol of our relationship, of how we were so close yet so far away from actually knowing anything about each other. You turned towards me, I remember seeing the lights of the city below us reflected in your eyes, and for a fleeting moment I regretted how our relationship had ended with us harbouring a coexisting love and hate for each other - an emotional ambivalence, never crossing the line either way, but teetering too precariously for us to ever have a healthy relationship.
When you smiled, told me you loved me, and delicately kissed my cheek, I didn’t hesitate to tell you I loved you back. It was a lie, of course. I knew it was a lie, and I think you knew it was a lie, too.
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The third time you said “I love you”, you were crying so hard that I’m sure you couldn’t even see my face.
When I first met you, you said you were a university student, studying biology (or something like that; honestly, remembering your education was not my main priority at the time). You had a part time job, and you lived in a dorm rented by the university.
Were we born purely to destroy each other? It certainly felt like it.
By the time we were through with each other, you were functionally a university drop out. Attending all those drug-fueled parties with me became your life, and studying was placed on the backburner for me. You were skipping classes to chill out and have sex with me, and more than a few times I spied a letter from the university warning you of your inevitable expelliation. You’d been fired from your part time job almost as soon as I had fixed my claws into your life - clearly it wasn’t possible to hold a job if you never actually showed up. Because you had no job, and you were spending all your money on alcohol and gambling with me, you could no longer afford to live in the university dorm anymore.
My life was falling apart, too. Ever since we had met that day, I’d been hyper fixated on you. My mind was constantly filled with you, Y/N. Thoughts of when I’d see you next. Thoughts of which places I could take you to get absolutely shit-faced. Thoughts of how I could make you scream out in pleasure. Thoughts of how you were always on my mind, like a constant itch I could never quite scratch. Thoughts of how I could destroy you.
It was only when you told me you were on the verge of homelessness and begged me to let you stay with me that I finally realised our relationship was a huge problem for both of us. I loved you so much, Y/N, but our relationship was taking over my life. You made me break my one rule - not to get attached - and that angered me. It stimulated a desire in me to totally wreck you and your life. 
I didn’t know how to deal with the simultaneous feelings of love and hate for you that were that strong. I loved you so much, and the only way I could get you to stay with me is if I ruined every other aspect of your life - your education, your career, your financial security. You were sweet, Y/N, but you were naive, and vulnerable. It made it easy for me to envelope you into my toxic life, and then spit you out when I was finished with you.
Only, the way I was acting wasn’t a reflection of who I truly was. I’d never reacted this way to someone I’d been seeing before. When I realised just how toxic our relationship was, I knew I had to end it. Being around you made me want to destroy every part of you - to take your heart in my hand and squeeze until it shattered into a million pieces - and that wasn’t normal, nor was it okay. 
The day I sat you down and told you it was over, you started crying immediately. Of course you did, who could blame you? I was the only thing you had left in this harsh world, and now I was slipping from your grasp, too. It was only when you told me you loved me, through the bitter tears rolling down your cheeks, that my stoic mask broke. I knew you loved me, and I love you too, so much, but we just couldn’t go on like this. We couldn’t keep hurting each other this way.
So, when it was all said and done, we promised not to see each other ever again.
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The last time you said “I love you”, we were twenty-two.
Turns out, you’re really good at keeping promises. I never saw you again, after the day we broke up. I held up my end of the bargain, too, but it was so hard. The temptation to message you, to crawl back into your life like a nasty leech was always there in the back of my mind. The idealization that your life had gone to pure shit since I’d left was also prominent, and the hopes that you’d message me saying how you couldn’t live without me were strong, but not reality.
We’re fifty now. 
In the past 28 years since we’d last seen each other, not a day went by where I didn’t think about you. As the years wore on, my hate towards you and the effects of our relationship slowly dissipated, and I was left with the empty feeling of regret. Yesterday, you were on the news. The biochemical company you worked with had just discovered a key component for the development of an important vaccine, and you’d been the one to speak with the press about it. When I saw your face, decorated with the fine lines of age, your hair showing sneaky signs of greying, I expected all the memories of us to come washing over me again. Instead, all I felt was remorse.
While your life was constantly on the upwards, mine had been spiralling down. After we’d broken up, I found it hard to find another lover to replace you. No one I slept with made me feel the same passion as you did - no one fueled that primal desire in me the way you did. I still had sex because I needed to in order to live, feeding off of the energy of others was what kept me alive, but it became more of a chore than anything. I was alive, but I wasn’t living. I was just existing. I am still just existing, twenty-eight years on.
When I think about you, Y/N, I think about what we could have been. What would have happened if we loved each other? Not loved the feeling of destroying each other, but of truly caring for one another? Would we have been happy together? I searched your name on the internet, and your wikipedia says you are contentedly married. Says you have been for well over eighteen years. I hope your partner loves you. I hope they treat you better than I did. I hope you’re happy with them.
I don’t think that our love story could have ended any other way. We were both too young, too vulnerable, and too obsessed with each other to ever have a happy ending together. I wish I could tell you how much I miss you, but I made a promise to you to not see you again, which I guess is why I’m writing this letter instead. To tell the paper all the things I will never get to say to you. To finally put it out there that if I had the chance to go back and forget you, to never meet you, I would. I wish nothing more than to go back to living a life where I had never loved you.
When I broke up with you, I wanted you to be happy. I knew I wouldn’t like it, but I knew in order to see you content again, I’d have to go. I left, you became happy and found the love of your life, and I will have to live with the regrets of my past actions for the rest of my miserable life.
I really hope you’re as happy as you seem.
Jaemin
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