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ma1dita · 3 months

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crazy little thing

a ‘partners in crime’ installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader

words: 3.4k

summary: (pre-established relationship) The one where he spends all his drachmas to make you smile. Sometimes, the Apollo kids are better matchmakers than Aphrodite herself. Everyone’s tired of you two dancing around each other. Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader

a/n: lil valentines day special though im working on more est. relationship fluff after this!! happy season 2 renewal babies

(posted 2/9/24 unbetaed)

—

“Come on, you gotta admit—it’s kinda funny!”

Luke is met with blank stares at the camp store after he places a few drachmas onto the folding table in front of the Apollo kids. They’re not sure if he’s trying to convince them, or himself.

Because yeah, that’s the excuse he goes for, wanting to spend his savings on having them sing to a certain head counselor instead of admitting his blatantly obvious feelings, so if you ask Lee Fletcher and his half-siblings, it’s kind of pathetic.

“What do we look like, a traveling mariachi band, Castellan?” he deadpans, watching the usually confident boy scratch the back of his neck with his face red like someone who’s been sitting out in the sun for too long.

“I’m not saying to follow her around all day or whatever, just pick a random time to sing a song and catch her off-guard,” he insists, before meeting the judgmental look of one of Lee’s younger siblings.

Lee chuckles, ruffling his sister’s hair before looking at Luke quite seriously, “She’s a good friend. You’re gonna have to pay us more than that. Special song for a special lady after all.”

The son of Hermes knows he’s gonna regret this sooner or later, but proceeds to throw the rest of his meager earnings onto the table. He has other ways of being resourceful anyway, the box of chocolates he nicked from behind the store counter feeling heavy in his jacket pocket.

“Right…she’s just a friend.”

Luke’s hands fidget at his sides as he stands there, feeling a little stupid.

Lee’s little sister scoops up the coins from the table, her raised eyebrows and light aura mirroring that of her older brother.

“What song were you thinking?” she asks, “Gotta make sure I know it if I’m singing it to your…friend.”

The 18-year-old boy tugs at his dark curls, getting more embarrassed and wanting to retreat with every minute that passes, but he’s never been one to back down from anything–swordfights, monsters, capture the flag, but this—trying to impress you...is a whole different story somehow.

Why are feelings so damn complicated?

It feels like being at the butt of a joke, or more accurately—at the sharp edge of a sword, and Luke never lets his fights end in a draw.

“You guys got it covered. Just…surprise me too, I guess,” he sighs, walking off without finishing his sentence. He wishes he could pray a little harder to his dad for luck, even if he’s unsure of what exactly he’s wishing for (or if his dad will even listen).

“Castellan’s hopeless. You think he knows it yet?” the girl asks her brother, to which Lee laughs.

“I don’t think she does either, even though everyone else can see right through them. The new bets are on who’s gonna break first. Chiron’s been keeping track, but don’t tell Mr. D.”

If Luke wants a show, they’ll make sure he’ll get his money’s worth—and hopefully, it’ll push you two along faster. Lee bet on you two getting together before the summer after all, and he’ll be damned if he loses to Clarisse.

—

Valentine’s Day might be the day of love, but for you, someone who’s single (not by choice), and heavily busy with making sure people aren’t so…enamored in public (you’ve lost count of the reports you’ve written out due to indecent behavior this morning alone)---this just feels like another Wednesday, except with more hormonal teenagers with uncontrollable urges than usual.

Oh, the joys of being the daughter of the camp director, also known as everyone’s favorite narc.

Honestly, love can suck it. With this much love in the air, you can feel it suffocating you like a plastic bag over your head.

That’s an uncontrollable urge. Too much?

Maybe Silena was right, you do need to open yourself up more to romantic opportunities. But if you have to watch another person swap spit and get pawed at like they’re the last dinner roll at the table….You might commit arson and set this place ablaze.

You just didn’t understand why people had to go all out today of all days. Shouldn’t love be shown year-round? Though you were a person of theatrics and enjoy a good show, it is amazing how much grandiose displays of affection make you cringe. It felt very performative, instead of genuine, and you would know, you’re the best actress at camp. You’ve acted out stories before, knowing all of the greatest romances and tragedies by heart. And you pride yourself on being a decent teacher to the campers, but for some of them, love still translates to a bad rendition of a ballad they heard on the radio.

Nothing gets past you at this point.

But that sucks too sometimes, you know?

Multiple failed flings and a heartbreak or two weigh down on you on days like this one, as you’re stuck being a bystander to outlandish displays put on by the Aphrodite kids being put to work. Love is their domain anyway, and yours…makes you feel a little less undesirable. Each demigod has their own strengths and weaknesses, but perhaps in the name of love, some of them don’t know how to take a hint. Several forgettable prose readings, a Sparknotes version of Eros and Psyche, and too many red roses to count have you reeling from exhaustion and a bit of disgust—-and it’s only lunchtime.

So yeah, maybe you’re a little jealous; they could call you Nemesis at this point.

The only flowers you got today were from the little kids from along the path to the strawberry orchard, and though it’s sweet—the human side of you misses affection.

Devotion.

To be a daughter of Dionysus meant to deal in extremes, obsession or nothing, and there are very few people who can handle that. Always being too much to handle, or uninterested as a defense mechanism. Perhaps that’s what scares admirers away.

That, or the fact that Luke Castellan is always attached to your hip. To be honest, you’ve always preferred it that way—the both of you working as a pair always gets things done faster around camp and he brightens your mood, whether you admit it or not.

But you two are just friends.

Really good friends who look for each other in crowded rooms, hands constantly brushing against the other for comfort, and able to pick up where the other one leaves off. Usually he’s the first person you see in the morning, and the last person you say goodnight to. You know how he likes his coffee and he cuts your apples for you as you two sit together in your unassigned seats in the dining pavilion. You watch each other’s workshops and if one of you is missing, everyone knows to ask the other to get an answer.

Right? That’s totally normal coworker/friend behavior.

If you were ever given immortality, perhaps they’d make you the goddess of denial.

You’re sweeping up confetti from the dining hall floor after an uncoordinated excuse of a flash mob was performed for one of the Demeter kids…and not to sound like a heinous bitch, but maybe next time they should use something biodegradable…or less messy. Sighing deeply, you feel someone’s eyes on you, and when you look up, Luke’s standing there with two full plates of food.

“Take a break, trouble. No one’s paying you overtime,” he jokes, and you roll your eyes as you put the broom aside.

“No one’s paying me at all…” you groan, before taking the plate out of his hands and knocking your head against his shoulder in thanks. He snickers as his hand brushes the small of your back, tickling your spine as he leads you to sit at a table.

“Just another holiday. You know how it is.”

“It’d be nice to have a night off though. Sometimes I regret taking up the position,” you mumble through spoonfuls of soup. He throws his large hand over your shoulder, kneading some tension from your trapezius. Head jerking along with the movements, you giggle as soup dribbles off your spoon, which makes his lips quirk into a small smile. Being around you felt so thoughtless and easy that if you told him to jump off a bridge he’d do it without question, which should be more concerning—the hold you have on him is irrevocable. Feelings are way too difficult for his teenage brain to comprehend at this stage. It’s easier to wash dishes with lava or fight off a dragon (bad example, he knows, but there’s something about you that already makes him feel like he’s losing before anything’s even happened).

Luke is someone who fights until the end, a soldier who’s always trained and so ready that sometimes it makes you wonder what war he’s preparing for. Infatuation, or the scarier, four-letter word was not something he was ever briefed on.

“No, you don’t. You’re a control freak,” he says with a grin.

Luke watches you play with the pendant on your necklace, the dragon scale he fashioned into your favorite accessory glinting in your hand. Running your fingers back and forth over the smooth surface, your other hand puts the spoon down and you place your head on his shoulder. He thinks if he had to describe the four-letter word on the tip of his tongue, he’d tell whoever’s asking about the way you kissed his healing cheek after you both left the Garden of Hesperides. More than a year later, Luke is still unable to find the right words even if the weakness has made a home in his heart with your name written all over it.

“I swear if I have to hear another person croak out a lovesong I might just drown myself in the Long Island Sound,” you scoff as his fingers trace circles onto your waist.

There’s a low strum of a guitar that reaches your ears and your forehead meets the cool surface of the table as you shut your eyes and grumble. It’s Lee and his half-siblings, beginning to walk through the hall seconds away from singing until they see Luke shaking his head and dragging his finger across his throat to please, gods, stop. The Apollo kids swivel and 180, walking out of the hall as the music stops dissonantly, rolling their eyes and dragging their feet.

“That was quick,” you say inquisitively as your head pops up from the table to see Luke looking off in the distance.

“Heh…I think they were just practicing or something…”

He then had to run off and pay them more drachmas for the inconvenience.

Fucking hustlers.

—

The sun sets quickly on Camp Half-Blood since it’s mid-February, and Luke finds you trying to calm your nerves as you look at the mess of glitter and paper mache that covers the arts and crafts hall from floor to ceiling.

“I can’t believe this!” you say in disbelief as you look at Luke, and he takes the can of Redbull out of your shaking hand.

“There’s just no fucking way everyone decided to use glitter. It’s everywhere! I’m—CONNOR, PUT THE SCISSORS DOWN!”

Luke sighs as he holds his hand out for his younger brother to give up the craft scissors, which he relinquishes with a mischievous grin.

“Guys, go find trouble somewhere else,” Luke mutters, pushing his head away, and where Connor goes, Travis quickly follows, tossing a canister of glitter back at him and not knowing it was still open.

“Oops.”

Immediately, the both of you are showered in iridescent particles, floating over your heads and stuck in your hair as the older Stoll brother looks at the two of you wide-eyed.

“You've already got trouble anyway,” he says teasingly, and this asshole winks at Luke before bolting out the door.

The room is silent now, and you pinch the bridge of your nose, before speaking, “I don’t care if he’s your brother, Luke. I might just fucking kill him.” You'd say more but your eyes are shut as you try not to breathe in glitter, and then the sound of the doorknob rattling catches your attention. Luke is standing there, finally faced with a door he can’t open, his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance–but the effect isn’t as menacing as it should be when he’s covered in red and pink sparkles.

“Not if I get to him first, the little bastard.”

“Just open the door,” you say panicked, running over and forcing his hands off the doorknob.

“I can’t if you won’t let me do it!” He grits, elbowing you and trying to unlock the door with both his inherited gift and brute strength.

“What kind of demigod even are you? Lockpicking is supposed to be your thing!”

“Well OBVIOUSLY, but it’s not working, now is it, trouble?”

Luke finishes off the rest of your energy drink before throwing the can over his shoulder and he swears he can hear you cuss at him under your breath as you berate him about the mess, so he chooses to focus on busting the door down instead of looking at the glitter stuck in your eyelashes and thinking about how the idea of being stuck in a room with you makes him feel weak at the knees. Through the window, his eyes meet the group of Apollo kids staring at the predicament you two are in (and the barricade of chairs the Stoll brothers put in front of the door). He sighs, and Lee’s little sister flips him off as they start to walk away again, instruments in tow.

“You gonna charge him again?”

A tiny Will Solace looks at his elders for guidance as they walk along the path. As one of the youngest in the bunch, he especially idolizes anything his half-siblings do, going along with whatever they see fit.

“No, but we’re close enough to the archery range that I might just shoot them through their hearts myself. Eros and Aphrodite themselves are pretty much begging us to,” Lee grumbles.

“Why are we doing this again?” Will babbles, and his half-sister grabs his hand to help him walk faster.

“A crazy little thing called love. You’ll understand it better someday, kid.”

—

Thankfully, it all starts winding down after dinner. Luke finds you leaning against a tree flipping through your clipboard during the camp sing-along, so he tugs at your elbow to get your attention.

“Wanna get out of here?”

You look at him, slotting your pen behind your ear as you notice faint glitter particles still dotted along his cheeks. As your lips pull into a small smile, you say, "I still have a few things to do after this, don't you?"

"Cleared your schedule for the night," he mumbles, and whether it's the glow of the bonfire or he's actually blushing, a teasing expression crosses your face as you step closer and cross your arms at him.

"You cleared my schedule for the night. How on earth did you do that?"

Instead of a proper reply, he grabs your hand, tugging you out to the docks near the lake.

"Don't worry about it."

He's not going to tell you that he owes Chris and Annie a few favors before the end of the month to make up for the night shift they ended up taking. Instead, you both sit cross-legged at the edge of the dock, a gentle breeze brushing at your clothes and for the first time today, you're able to just exist.

"I hate Valentine's Day," you suddenly say, looking up at the night sky, and he's watching you closely as the gentle shine of the moon casts a cool glow on your face. Luke cringes at your statement, thinking he's already thrown away his shot.

"Why's that?"

"Tell me something Luke, am I unlikable? Like, is there anything wrong with me?"

He looks at you like you've told him you’re secretly a cyclops.

“The fuck? How many times do I have to tell you that everyone thinks you’re great?"

You don't even give him a chance to finish his sentence before you blurt, "I don’t want to be great, I want to be loved!" Reeling back a little, you lean back on your hands to create some distance.

“Sorry... that was a lot, and I’m just...wanting to be noticed. It's nice to have people's attention sometimes, you know?”

You’ve got all of mine, he thinks, realizing he never stood a chance at fighting it—this four-letter feeling you give him is the first and only battle he’ll back down from, and you're the only person he’ll wholeheartedly surrender to.

In short, he’s fucked.

"I always notice you." He pulls out a dented box of chocolates from his jacket pocket, opening it up for the both of you to share, and the look of amusement on your face makes him glad that at least one thing somewhat went to plan today, even if the chocolate truffles are a bit smushed. You’re popping one into your mouth and his dark eyes follow the trail of your fingers to your mouth, feeling his heart beat a bit faster.

But then you both hear the soft strum of a guitar from near the trees, and the two of you turn to hear some of the Apollo kids singing beautifully along the coastline.

I'll be seeing you, in all the old, familiar places...That this heart of mine embraces...

You gasp, grabbing Luke’s arm to push yourself up so that the both of you can turn and face a small group of your closest Apollo friends singing to the both of you. Luke’s eyes soften further when he feels you grab his hand and squeeze, leaning against his shoulder as you listen.

“Did you do this?” you mumble, still entranced by the performance.

“Only if it makes you laugh.”

And you do, in the way that he loves—a bit crazy and too loud, and it’s perfect.

I’ll always think of you that way…I’ll find you in the morning sun….

Whether it’s fireflies or Will bouncing light off the water to look like small, glowing candles, Luke can’t tell—he’s too busy watching your lips pull into a smile so confectionery his sweet tooth starts to ache. The little kid was never good at archery like his other half-siblings, but as your eyes shimmer under the ambient lights, you think his added romantic gesture shot you straight through the heart.

“You know, sometimes I really do hate you, Luke Castellan,” you whisper, and it couldn’t be more far from the truth.

“No, you don’t.”

His eyes flicker to you again, but you’re already looking back at him.

“I don’t.”

And when the night is new, I’ll be looking at the moon…but I’ll be seeing you…

It’s quiet now, and you’re unsure of where the Apollonian ensemble disappeared to but instead of worrying about if they’ll make it back before curfew, you stand there in front of Luke with your guard down.

Getting a little closer than he expected, your noses brush before you pull the slightly crushed wildflowers from your jean pocket, the only physical reminder you’ve kept from today, and tuck them into his jacket pocket, sitting right above his heart.

“Thank you.”

Luke doesn’t realize he’s holding his breath until he feels your lips gently kiss the marred skin on his right cheek, the blemish having an uncanny resemblance to a stroke of lightning; it serves as a reminder of his weakness. The lines blur as his eyes close to savor it and he doesn’t know if weakness is your kisses or his scar—but he is vulnerable to it all the same, realizing there’s a crack in the otherwise perfect persona that he’s worked so hard on. When his eyes open again, his Achilles’ heel has taken human form.

—

“This has got to be cheating,” Clarisse grumbles as she watches from the distance, hidden behind the trees.

“It’s not cheating if I’m winning. Silena’s gonna get a kick out of this,” Lee chuckles, ushering everyone back towards the cabins. It’s a bit harder to do this in the dark as they try to be quiet and not interrupt whatever will happen next between their favorite counselors.

“Well lucky for you, your gifts are cute and romantic, what am I supposed to do? They fight enough!”

“That’s what got them into this mess in the first place. Come on, curfew’s in 10. We’ll find out which of us wins the bet soon enough,” Chris mutters, pushing them along back onto the main path.

“Easy for you to say, Rodriguez, you live with Luke!”

“Would I ever lie to you, La Rue?” he says with a mischievous grin, and the Apollo kids giggle at the irony.

—

“My body ages,

my anger burns into a seam.

I am so annoyed by love

and still it comes.”

-Kate Baer

ask to be added to luke/general taglists!

luke taglist (some won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?): @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko @bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303 @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r @visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri @number-onekidqueen @bradynoonswife @stevenknightmarc @hoodedhavok @happy-mushrooms @homebyeleven @anotherblackreader @too-deviant @liviessun @lilacspider @theadventuresofanartist @sucker4seresin @simpforsunwoo @zanzie @starrystormwritings

#luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x dionysus!reader #luke castellan x reader fanfic #pjo x reader #percy jackon and the olympians #luke castellan fluff #made by ma1dita ♥︎#trouble!verse #thank you for reading my love ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

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adoraboy-moved · 9 months

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what i need narc abuse believers to realize when we say "narc/npd abuse doesn't exist" is that we are not saying:

your abuse wasn't real or valid

pwNPD are never abusive

pwNPD are perfect angels who can do no wrong, ever

you're a liar

you're lying about your abuse

there is a 0% chance your abuser had npd

abuse isn't real

abuse doesn't happen, ever

you're an abuser

you are, without a doubt, not disabled, and also one hundred percent ableist and sanist

we are saying, though:

narc abuse itself, as a concept, does not exist

narcissists do not perpetuate any type of abuse that egotypicals can't

your abuse and trauma wasn't narcissistic abuse but rather emotional or psychological abuse

narc abuse itself, as a concept, has harmed pwNPD and their relationships

narc abuse has ruined any chance of finding actually good resources

narc abuse itself, as a concept, has been used to abuse narcissists

narc abuse itself, as a concept, is named after a mental disorder, which is inherently sanist and ableist

you have ableist and sanist biases that you do need to check, regardless of if you're intentionally or actively trying to harm people or not

#she looks just like a dream 🤍 talking #anti narc abuse #anti ableism #anti sanism #ableism #sanism

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punkpandapatrixk · 8 months

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🥀Sad Bitch Lilith ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

We live in a world where being too kind, too sweet, too compassionate and forgiving could often lead to disastrous outcomes. This is after all a world where narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths run free without much repercussion. A sweet girl can’t be pleasant all the time; a goddess needs to carry a machete from time to time.

What most people have yet to grasp, is that Venus and Lilith quite literally make each side of the Divine Femininity coin. Venus represents Light and Lilith represents Dark; even then, they could easily switch roles depending on the situation at hand. Only if you want—you are allowed to embody both Venus and Lilith in their respective glory.

Do you really want to become that kind of idiot who sends love and light to those who have done you much harm? You don’t have to force yourself to be the bigger person in a conflict that was created for the sole purpose of stripping you of power and autonomy. Enablers and gaslighters enforce that kind of idea so you make room for their terrible behaviour. WAKE. UP.

So many women in this world have at some point been a Sad Bitch Lilith at the hands of psychopaths, sociopaths and narcs in whatever role they play in their lives. Hopefully this reading serves to help you turn the narrative into SAVAGE LILITH. The Dark Moon Goddess who delights in revenge for she knows in it lies EDUCATION for the imbeciles who have foolishly disrespected her kind, sweet, friendly, feminine qualities. The Dark Feminine retorts,

‘RESPECT ME OR GET DESTROYED.’

Black Moon Lilith is a Goddess of Redemption. She takes into her own hands matters of delivering nightmare to those who have wronged her. She calculates in the dark. She doesn’t ask for permission. She's a wild woman. She punishes swiftly. She moves history.

She is Karma.

Karma paid in revenge glow up, BITCH🌹

SONG: I’ll Make You Cry by aespa

MOVIE: Gone Girl (2014)

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 3]

[Patreon] [Paid Readings]

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – When My Tears Silently Turn to Diamonds

the way your beauty irritates people – 10 of Pentacles Rx

VIBE: I’m Unhappy by aespa

You’re somebody who’s perceived as abundant and superfluous by others. It’s super obvious from the way you look, the way you carry yourself, or even your family background. You just… exude a rich vibe—whether or not you actually come from old money. Damn, you just have it in you. It’s something you were born with. Even if you didn’t come from a rich background, or even if right now, for some reason you’re struggling with resources, no, honey, listen: it’s your fucking AURA.

People can see either you’re blessed since birth—with money, beauty, talents, whatever—or they simply can smell that you’re gonna make it big someday. Most people you’ve known in your environment, do not like this about you at all. It’s their own fault though, why in the name of fuck are they always comparing themselves to you? Did you ask for that? Never. But they’re always imagining how nice it would be in your shoes without knowing for realz your life story.

They project their insecurities at you even when you’ve never wanted to make anybody feel that way because of your presence. In many ways, I think you’ve tried so hard to make you look ordinary, or in some cases, you’ve tried to show a lot of care and generosity. You’ve tried to make everybody see that you’re just like them even if your circumstances are not exactly the same. It never worked though—maybe it’s even backfired.

Your abundance… is simply irritating to them because you’re surrounded by motherfucking losers, babe.

silencing the negative self-talk – XIX The Sun

VIBE: ASAP by NewJeans

You should be done feeling bad for being radiant. It’s not your fault other people are ugly. It’s not your responsibility that other people don’t have money. How are you at fault when a good company chooses you for the talents and skills you’ve developed which they need? Seriously, it’s none of your business if others wouldn’t work on themselves to be considered an amazing creature in society. You keep being you, honey. You and I know you’re always refining your natural talents and deepening your base knowledge. You’re truly a hustler even if others don’t see that.

When you’re not saddened or confused by others’ terrible attitude towards your blessings, your mindset is really positive like the Sun itself. Of all the Piles, I think your heart is the purest🤣You’re more generous than people give you credit for. You’re always trying to make everyone feel welcomed. If you were a party host, you’d make sure every single person has a good time in ways that suit them. You’re that attentive.

Unfortunately, your Light, indeed babe, seems to attract a lot of harmful bugs. No matter how much you give, it’ll never be enough and nothing you do will stop the gossip and badmouthing and backstabbing. Because essentially, these bottom-feeders are already bitter about their own pathetic lives. They hate you as much as they hate themselves for not having the courage to feel deserving of the abundance you’ve worked hard for.

S A V A G E – 4 of Wands

VIBE: Hurt by NewJeans

‘Leave them at the bottom of the grave they dug for you.’ – something I saw on Pinterest

Because you’re too kind, too giving, I think you’re the type of person who wouldn’t have the heart to leave people behind where they are miserable. Umm… you need to grow up a little bit more and finally see for yourself how pointless that is. You’re just one person, what makes you think you could save everybody? I hope you don’t yourself turn into a megalomania who thinks others wouldn’t survive without your charity.

Leave that toxic environment and you will regenerate yourself. As you do so, you become a vibrational match to some kind of a Soul Tribe situation where you’ll be met with people who aren’t the least bit parasitic. You’ve got to believe you’re deserving of a symbiosis mutualistic kind of relationships and friendships for them to manifest, OK?

As for the anklebiters? Hurt them with your leaving them. Hurt them with your totally ignoring and blocking them. I’m not saying you have to throw a brick at them for all the disrespect they’ve dealt on you. I’m sure your change of attitude will hurt the living shit out of them. And one day, when you’re famous and important, they’ll see you, alright. They’ll see you for all that you’ve always been capable of doing and they’ll regret they didn’t treat you better. And they’ll wallow in immense pain for not having access to you anymore. Nevermore. Leave them hurting in their shame and regrets. That’ll kill them😈

SWEET MOTHER OF REVENGE 🔻💙

VILLAIN ORIGIN STORY – Gold Physician (Herodotus)

Reclaiming Lilith – Priestess of Prosperity

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – You See This Glow-Up? NOW You Jelly

the way your beauty irritates people – Knight of Wands Rx

VIBE: 28 Reasons by Seulgi

First and foremost, you’re a damn rare beauty. I don’t care if you don’t think that highly of your physical appearance; bitch, you’re goddamn attractive. Take it or leave it. Your problem is that you act like you’re ordinary and that irritates the living shit out of your enemies because they think you’re fake. ‘How dare you act ordinary when you’re obviously that pretty. Are you mocking us??’ Yeah… Why the fuck are you surrounded by ordinary beauties? Have you got Venus squaring Pluto? Huehue~

Anyway, in any situation you’re an eye candy and everybody can see that. Maybe you’re dense enough to not see how others see you, but all these friends of yours, they’re hyper aware of how all eyes are on you the moment you slightly move. You stir the air in a way no other human does. It’s because there’s passion and authenticity in you that make you vibrate on a much higher level than most people. Really, you’re a rare gem but this could get you in danger a lot.

You’re the type of beauty that invites enemies actually because of your friendly disposition. Like, there’s this annoying gap that irritates people in ways even they don’t really understand. The gap between your intense beauty/attraction and your general politeness. You’re soft spoken, cheerful and helpful. For the most part, you’re a ball of joy and if you’re a girl, boys like you A LOT. You’re fun. You’re cool. You’re smart and creative. A lot funnier than people assume. You’re the IT GIRL. But the envious ones call you a pick-me LMAO

Envious girls put a lot of effort into brandishing you as a trashy character but by doing that, even the boys could see who’s the real G here. And well, wouldn’t that annoy their trashy asses further?🤷🏻‍♀️They’re literally ruining their own image by trying to ruin you🤡

silencing the negative self-talk – 8 of Wands Rx

VIBE: Forgive Me by BoA

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s have a heart-to-heart. Honey, you’ve got to stop pretending like you’re a sweet Venus all the time. You’re not. You and I know that. Deep down, there’s an evil bitch in you that wants to play with fire. I think you’ve tried to curb your Lilith practically your entire Life. Perhaps on a subconscious level you know this of you and you want to avert your eyes from looking at your Lilith. That’s how you seem fake sometimes.

Highly intuitive people can smell the Devil in you, but you act like you’re an angel all the time. And that’s annoying because your Lilith is literally a men-magnet and this often takes away attention from other girls but you act all innocent💩I’m not saying it’s your fault—I sense that for the most part, you don’t even consciously want this intense attention; I’m saying there’s this mechanism about how you’re perceived by your environment.

Aaand why do you think that is? Of course, because subconsciously, you want all of this attention. You always want to be wanted and liked and desired. You crave that shit so bad because when you were tinier you felt unseen. Un-understood. Unappreciated. Now, doesn’t matter who or how, you just want everybody to see you and want you, but you’re not gonna give them back any of that attention. You want to be unattainable. Actually, you are unattainable. You don’t easily let people get close to you. You don’t want people in your personal space. You just want the a t t e n t i o n.

S A V A G E – 5 of Wands Rx

VIBE: Savage by aespa

You know, this is all just a lil game to you. Deep down, you’re fighting this urge to snatch everybody’s boyfriends and husbands. Sometimes you get frightened by your evil desires because if you were unhinged, you’d want all these married people to want you more than they want their spouses. It’s not even that serious. You just want to come on top of everybody. You’re secretly envious of these little bitches who are—probably—loved by their spouses. And even when you can see there’s no Love in that connection, you’re still jealous that someone wants to commit themselves to these undeserving mediocre asses.

You feel all alone in this world. People are only nice to you because of your looks or whatever else that’s not even that important. And people are also nasty to you because of your looks and everything else that’s not even that important. It’s been one insanely difficult Life for you. You’re sad. You feel abandoned and unwanted in spite of all the shallow praises. And there’s this quiet rage inside that wants to punish everyone for not caring about the REAL you.

Bitch, grow up a little bit and you’ll see that low-quality people get married to their fellow mediocre asses. You don’t play in the same dimension as them so don’t lower your standards🤭One day you’ll see who’s gonna end up divorced and miserable because they all married the wrong people! Nah, that’s not even the important part LMAO The important part is when you’re the one marrying a Soul Mate after all of your spiritual and psychological glow-up that made you a vibrational match to so much REAL LOVE and you’re surrounded by all this money and beauty.

You never needed their kind of a glow-up; you were born perfection. You needed a different kind of confidence to SLAY and be very happy.

SWEET MOTHER OF REVENGE 🔻❤️

VILLAIN ORIGIN STORY – Red Magus (Edward Kelly)

Reclaiming Lilith – Priestess of Happiness

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Pile 3 – You Thought I’d Give It All to You

the way your beauty irritates people – 2 of Cups

VIBE: The Weekend by BIBI

You’re this absolutely weird mix of devil and angel in one body. You attract ALL kinds of people. Young, old. Men, women. Animals and toddlers are either terrified by you or LOVE you to oblivion. People always want something from you, right? They either simp for you or act like you owe them something—usually when their simping doesn’t pay off LMAO That’s really weird… Your entire existence is weird. I like that😉

You’re definitely giving, charitable, although in reality you’re really selective with whom you allow in your personal space. ‘Just because I’m friendly with you doesn’t mean I wanna be friends with you,’ kind of vibe. Nevertheless, people are silly, and they cultivate this weird intense desire within them. They build all these unnatural expectations around you having to give or share with them.

In their sick minds, they demand this. When you don’t humour them their sick demands, they get ULTRA bitter, probably even resentful. And then they seek to destroy you. Weird. Weird. Weird. You never even intended to lead them on. People are crazy when you’re around. The worst part is, they never even had your best interest at heart. They just wanted something from you—energy, attention, favouritism, gentle caress, who the hell cares.

How much Neptunian/Pisces/12th House energy do you have for you to be this way?😷HAHAH

silencing the negative self-talk – Page of Pentacles

VIBE: KAZINO by BIBI

Unlike the other Piles, you don’t seem to have a lot of neg self-talk. You’re sassy, bitchy, and you embrace your negative qualities because you see the value in them. Society ain’t perfect either anyway, what’s so wrong in being me the way that I am? You go, girlie~ You’re a total believer in revenge and vengeance. You ARE the definition of Lilith incarnate. Were you born with it? Did you develop yourself to be this way? Who the fuck knows—that’s your very own secret ingredient~

You’d rather let the mortals hurt and rot in their own stupidity than let yourself be the one to hurt. Unless you’re defending those you care about, you’re never sustaining hurt. You hurl lemons at all your enemies before they could get closer. Any step closer, you squirt that lemon in their eyes. Their fault. You warned them already! ‘Hey, I’m nice but I ain’t no saint,’ is your philosophy.

And when you’re really, really, really done with someone’s bullshit, you ain’t afraid to spill some blood. You’re gonna be smart about it though. You plan quietly and attack unexpectedly with a demonic angel smile on your face. ‘Send a message to your god; you’ve messed with the wrong bitch, BITCH.’

You are a menace to society👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

S A V A G E – XII The Hanged Man Rx

VIBE: Vengeance by BIBI

See, you are one sneaky bitch. Though you are a fucking menace to society, you know how to act righteous. You also know how to act like the victim should the occasion arise—but this is rare because you like to appear on top of everyone. Still, you’re quite masterful at creating sad or horrendous backstories that would justify your wreaking havoc upon your enemies, or even just society at large. Your sense of morality is kinda shrewd LMAO And I think that’s because you’ve been at the mercy of someone else’s shrewd behaviour before, probably when you were a lot younger.

That made you realise you never wanted to be the victim anymore. If anything, you’ll terrorise everyone so you maintain your own safety. WHEW. You’ve got your trust broken in authority. Their rules didn’t protect you or even hurt you. So, you believe new rules should be made in their place. You make your own rules and you don’t care if that hurts some people. You have this dicktionary explaining what kinds of dickhead are worth sacrificing to your new-world agenda.

🤣🤣🤣You’re CRAZY!

I believe in you. I think you could change the world. But I think you’re largely only interested in your own world. The whole world? That’s too much trouble. You aren’t keen on destroying your small queendom/kingdom in exchange for world domination—you smart like that. Keep at that. WHOA.

SWEET MOTHER OF REVENGE 🔻🧡

VILLAIN ORIGIN STORY – Green Magus (John Dee)

Reclaiming Lilith – Priestess of Divination

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 3]

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corvinarc · 28 days

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The demonization of NPD

NPD = narcissistic personality disorder

ASPD = antisocial personality disorder

Narcissist = someone with NPD

Sanism = a type of ableism specific to mental illnesses and neurodivergence

Out of the four cluster b disorders, NPD is highly demonized and stigmatized. It could be considered a "casual demonization" due to the unique way it is. Only ASPD shares this unique form of demonization (post coming soon).

What is casual demonization?

Coined by me, causal demonization refers to a specific type of social demonizing. The "casual" is because it starts through everyday conversation, on social media, then outwardly spreads. It's not championed by specific groups, but rather everyday people. Because of this, it's far more difficult to unlearn and to destigmatize.

What does this demonization look like?

• use of narcissist in conversation to mean "abuser" or "bad person"

• posts spreading misinformation, like "narcissist eyes turn black" or "narcissists are demons"

• the stereotype of narcissists being manipulative, liars, and exploitative

• "how to hurt a narcissist", "is my loved one a narcissist", "how to deal with a narcissist", and media similar

• the assumption of the narcissist stereotype in most settings, even therapy settings

• the idea of "narcissistic abuse"

Effects of anti-narc sanism

• inability to receive a diagnosis due to stereotyping and medical biases

• lack of easily accessible resources

• lack of support system

• narc abuse truthers engaging in abusive behavior against narcissists

• belief all narcissists are abusers

• pushing narcissists out of activist spaces

• pushing narcissists out of ND spaces

The examples listed are not the only possibilities.

How to fight against anti narc sanism

• talk to narcissists

• educate yourself and others on NPD

• recognize that "narcissistic abuse" doesn't exist, and explain to others

• spread informational posts by narcissists

• address personal biases

• overall, don't be a dick and treat us like you treat "acceptable" disorders

#corvinarc talks #narcissistic personality disorder #npd #npd positivity #npd safe #actually cluster b #actually narcissistic #actually npd #cluster b #cluster b safe #narcissism #narcissistic abuse

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mirroringshards · 2 months

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anyway heres why narc abuse support groups are harmful

main point ; there would be aloooott less abusive narcissists if there were resources and ways for us to seek help, however, when you search up "npd recovery" you get shit like "HOW TO KILL A NARCISSIST!", "recovering from narc abuse". not "how to cope with npd symptoms". there are resources for you. there are only resources for you. not for us. and, if there are any resources for us, our mental state is fucking destroyed looking for them. if you see that millions of people want you dead, while trying to get help, its not gonna fucking end well for you.

therapy is an option ; but not always. infact, there are alot of therapists who refuse to even see you because of the whole "narcs are abusive!!!!" thing. but, not only that, therapy may not be an option for alot of reasons. have you considered the fact that it costs money? what about people that are still in a toxic environment, and cant go? people who cant find a therapist nearby, or for a reasonable cost, or a therapist they feel works well for them? people with busy schedules and cant plan sit down appointments? not everyone can seek help, or have the energy to. sometimes your only option is the internet.

if you want narcissists to be less abusive, change the fucking word you use to describe your abuse and stop acting like we're all demons. this is a lose lose situation we're still "abusive" towards you and we cant fucking get help.

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clusterrune · 1 year

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NPD Resource Masterpost

a whole bunch of list of this npd related for those looking to lear and/or cope.

Coping (Centered) Resources:

(1), supply list(2)

Treatment/Recovery (Centered) Resources:

(1), Strategies(1),

Actually Decent Articles:

Can a narc change(1), (2),

Misc./Unsorted:

Resource list(1)

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jewishvitya · 9 months

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I was having a conversation about "narcissistic abuse" with a person with NPD. We were talking about the need to call out toxic behaviors that might come with unmanaged NPD, and how it's nothing like what we see now online. We talked about how people like them, who want to treat others well and manage their disorder, deserve to have resources that help them have healthy relationships. And they thanked me for not immediately assuming the worst of them. Which. Just shows you how they're used to being treated.

They got suicide baiting from random strangers just for the fact that they have NPD.

I've seen people getting told "this is doing nothing but making me feel awful about myself" and responding with "you should feel awful about yourself, you're a narcissist!"

It's dangerous to equate abuse with narcissism. It's dangerous to see people with NPD as deserving of harm. Most people with NPD will already be victims of abuse - that's how the disorder is usually developed. If you buy into the idea that they're abusive by nature, you're harming survivors.

There's no harmless way to dehumanize an entire group of people. Especially not over a trait they can't help.

Victims and survivors of abuse should get to talk about their experiences. This doesn't require diagnosing anyone and it doesn't require using a term that's associated with a disorder that's already seen as an inherent evil. There's no kind of abuse that's inherent or exclusive to a specific disorder. I hear the term "coercive control" which sounds really good for the kind of emotional and psychological abuse that gets discussed in those conversations, without adding ableist stigma.

If your opposition to ableism doesn't include people with the most stigmatized disorders, how deeply are you truly thinking about things.

The harm caused to people with NPD through stigma is enough for this to matter. But in addition to that, it's harmful to other people too.

First of all, because you buy into having a group of people who become acceptable targets over a condition they can't help.

Second, because you teach yourself to armchair diagnose people. Which means that you get to put whoever you want into the "acceptable target" group.

When you have a group of people that you think don't deserve to be treated as people, it's easier to persuade you to put unrelated people in that category. Think of the way accusations of "child predator!" are wielded against queer people too. This is not an uncommon tactic.

And it's already a thing here. Sam Vaknin was the one who coined the term narcissistic abuse. That's a man with no credentials to talk about mental health or about abuse. He's a hateful bigoted person. The things that he considers narcissistic include homosexuality, transgender identities, and women who sleep with multiple men instead of settling down with one.

If you buy into the idea that having NPD essentially means being abusive, and then all these things are all narcissistic things. At that point we have a line drawn between queerness and abuse, using the line that was drawn between NPD and abuse.

And another point, about the harassment people with NPD get, is - we shouldn't be punishing people. Just, in general. Punishment isn't justice and it isn't accountability. Withstanding whatever harm people see fit to inflict on you because they were convinced to hate you, rightfully or not, isn't justice or accountability. Even if you convinced yourself that the harm isn't real because… it happens in the virtual space? And that makes it fake somehow?

Think of the way people online talk about narcissists. Think of how easily they armchair diagnose NPD, calling any abuser a narc, and sometimes from one sided stories. And the way people hurry to cyberbully and dogpile.

Abusers will often paint their victims as the abusive ones as a way to escape being known as abusive. And if you take the job of punishing people that you decided deserve it, you will at some point become a tool of an abuser trying to further harm their victim.

Even if you see evidence, it's easy to fake and manufacture. And it'll only become easier with voice and video AI tools. And even if it's all true, punishing people does nothing good.

Convincing you that a group of people is inherently dangerous is a way to make you willing to harm them, or stand by as harm is being done to them. People with NPD don't deserve that.

Stop looking for people that it's acceptable to harass and punish and ostracize. Most of us are susceptible to mob mentality, and having acceptable targets makes you dangerous.

#npd #riki babbles #ableism #npd stigma

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archie-sunshine · 4 months

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Survey Says-! (18+ Rodimus/EVERYONE)

Chapter 4: *Hacker Voice*I'm In. (Rodimus/Perceptor)

Rodimus is NOT bitter about the results of the crew satisfaction survey, in fact, he’s fully prepared to change! He’s determined to change his crew’s minds, and what better way to do so than to get to know them- in the carnal sense that is.

There are no problems with this plan in Rodimus’s mind. There are many in Ultra Magnus’s. Magnus engages in some unfortunate(for Rodimus) damage control as head of Cybertronian Resources. Rodimus is not easily deterred.

Other Chapters Here! Read on AO3 Here!

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FIC TAGS: Rodimus/Everyone(But y’know, not like. EVERYONE. Just a lot of various background characters and also more specifically with some others), Takes place post dark cybertron, but pre the whole ship disappearing thing and the mutiny, smut, Chastity, denial, Rodimus is a slut, Ongoing humiliation, HR Violations as comedy, Ultra Magnus is clueless, sticky sexual interfacing, comedy, sexual comedy, dubious consent (if you squint and tilt your head), contains illustrations(but only on AO3)

____________________________

Authors notes: PSYCHE! I lied to you, this one is REAL PERCEPTOR HOURS!! Also theres no illustration in this chapter because I! am! sick! Next one i'll try for but for this one i didn't really feel like it. Also perceptor might be out of character but idk i dont know enough about him sadly. NEXT chapter will be very intensely self indulgent and incredibly batshit kinky, so be warned

CHAPTER TAGS: Rodimus/Perceptor, plug and play interfacing, orgasm denial, rodimus continues to have terrible luck, sexual science experiments, not following proper lab safety procedures, etc etc

“Brainstorm! I’ve got a project for you to work on!!” Rodimus singsonged as he stepped into the laboratory. He paused, glancing around at the seemingly uninhabited room. “Brainstorm?”

He jolted at the sound of someone clearing their vocalizer. He quickly spun towards the sound. “My apologies captain, Brainstorm is currently off shift.” Perceptor explained evenly, standing from his station.

Dammit. Rodimus cursed internally, clamping down his field to prevent the other mech from catching the disappointment in it. “Ah, I see- Sorry for bothering you then, keep up the good work!” He said, beginning to back out of the lab.

Perceptor cocked his head. “Perhaps I could be of assistance? What was it that you needed, Rodimus?”

Rodimus cleared his vocalizer, doing the math in his head. On the Rodimus Narc Scale, Perceptor ranked pretty high. He was about as straight-laced as anyone on the lost light could be expected to be. On one hand, it would be absolutely mortifying to beg Perceptor to remove the magnetizer.

On the other hand, Rodimus was going to die if the magnetizer stayed on.

“... Yeah, maybe you can help- just-! Uhm… can you keep a secret?”

Perceptor frowned, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. “I see.”

Rodimus’s optics flitted around nervously. “S-so… is there any way you can get it off?” This had to be a new low for him, laid out on a hastily cleared off work table while Perceptor closely examined his panels. He had to admit he was a bit aroused at the thought of being a slutty little science project, which he wasn’t exactly happy about. He tried to stomp down whatever feelings he was having about the whole situation, averting his gaze from the contemplative bot hunched over him.

“I’m afraid that I must once again defer to Ultra Magnus’s rulings on the matter: Crew members are not allowed to remove the magnetizer until your period of punishment is over.” Perceptor said, giving Rodimus a piteous look.

Rodimus looked at him helplessly. “But-”

“However, if you are feeling… *ahem* any discomfort from…” He waved his servo generally over Rodimus’s closed panels. “Lack of stimulation, shall we say… I may be able to help in some other way?”

Rodimus immediately perked up. “Yes, absolutely, totally, what is it?”

“I’m no mnemosurgeon, but…” Perceptor cleared his vocalizer again awkwardly, reaching his right servo over to the back of his neck and carefully procuring his diagnostic cable. Rodimus blushed a bit, feeling incredibly stupid for not considering the possibility of plugging. It wasn’t his style anyway, he liked it more tactile, but at this point, he’d take anything he could get. “I believe I could find some way to relieve your… tension.”

Rodimus sat up, nodding enthusiastically. “Sure, uhm- how do you want me?”

Perceptor reached forwards with his cable, brushing his digits lightly over the captain’s neck cabling. “This position will work, just hold still- ah, there it is.” An arc of charge connected the two of them briefly as the scientist plugged into Rodimus’s neck port. Rodimus felt a zing through his circuits as Perceptor made his presence there known. “Now, to warn you, you may feel some… unfamiliar tactile stimulus, this is perfectly normal, but I’m mostly going to be looking through your processor to put together a code to give you some relief alright?”

Rodimus blinked. “Sorry?”

Perceptor cleared his vocalizer again uncomfortably. “I’m going to put together a dataslug to plug into your ports to make you overload. And I need to look through your processor to put that together.”

“Ah.” Rodimus felt his faceplate heat up.

“Indeed. Could you drop your firewalls for me?” Perceptor turned his vision away, picking up a datapad and beginning to take notes.

“Can do, thanks again Percey.” Rodimus swallowed, focusing on lowering the firewall. He felt a shiver run down his back strut as the other mech began to rifle through his databanks. It was an odd sensation, similar to someone tickling the back of his neck or whispering in his ear. It wasn’t necessarily sexual- yet- but it left tingles racing up and down his plating as he felt Perceptor work.

[Can you see this message?-P]

Rodimus shivered again, the message appearing at the front of his processor. He allowed his optics to go offline, focusing on the attention Perceptor was giving his mind.

[Yep, loud and clear-R]

[Splendid. I’m going to be stimulating some areas, you ping once for positive, twice for negative, understand?-P]

[Got it-R]

He could feel the other bot probing around, his processor feeling warmed. It almost felt like he was a book that Perceptor was leafing through, each priority tree and code flicking past like files in a cabinet. He felt Perceptor stop, then felt a wash of sudden heat wrack his frame as the code [Action input- pleasure centers online] appeared at the front of his mind. Rodimus pinged once, letting out a shaky sigh.

“S-sorry-” He muttered absently, briefly reminded of the professionalism he was at least half attempting to keep around the other mech.

“It’s quite alright captain, again,” Perceptor began, not looking up from his datapad. Without warning, Rodimus’ leg jerked, his reflex codes accidentally engaging as Perceptor prodded at them. “Any accidental physical stimulus is quite natural. You may react however is normal for you.”

[Action input- Prefluid Production- Off]

Rodimus huffed out a nervous laugh before gritting his dentas.

[Action input- Test- valve calipers]

He swore it felt like Perceptor’s digits were stroking over his processor, his whole frame shuddering as the calipers in his valve cycled down against Rodimus’ will. He pinged once again, earning an appreciative hum from the other mech. Rodimus’ digits clenched, scratching at the workbench as Perceptor engaged the code again, his valve squeezing around nothing.

[Action input- Test- anterior node]

Rodimus squawked out a groan. His hips canted up off the workbench as he felt his anterior node twitch with sudden pleasure. He quickly pinged yet another positive. He let out a punched out breath as the stimulation ceased and let himself go limp on the table again.

[You are doing quite well, Rodimus-P]

Rodimus let out an embarrassing whine, trying to quiet himself. He felt like he was going to die of embarrassment. Perceptor seemed to pause for a moment.

[Your pleasure centers react very enthusiastically to praise.-P]

Rodimus’ face flushed. He kept his intake clamped shut, refusing to let him embarrass himself even further.

[Is that a bad thing?-R]

[Does it feel bad?-P]

[Action input- Test- Praise reaction]

Rodimus writhed, optics flickering on and off as a wash of giddy pride and pleasure came over his frame at Perceptor’s behest.

“N-no-” Rodimus choked out.

[Then it’s not a bad thing-P]

Rodimus quivered, biting down on his lower derma. He felt his spike housing open below his panels, then let out a pained hiss as his panels attempted to open. Perceptor quickly deactivated the directive, mumbling a quiet apology before continuing his work.

[Action Priority- Tactile stimulus]

[Action input- Raise tactile sensory absorption]

Rodimus’s plating suddenly felt alight with sensation, every inch of contact with anything setting his frame on fire with pleasure. He let out a long, pained moan as heat overtook his body. He didn’t need to look to know he was most likely steaming from the seams at this point, though his assumption was confirmed as Perceptor winced and inputed another code.

[Action Priority- Vent heat]

He let out a relieved sigh as his vents kicked on higher, squeezing his legs together. Even just the feeling of his own plating shifting together was enough to send sparks of charge down his frame.

[Action input- array pressurize]

Rodimus groaned, wincing in pain as his array pushed needily against the back of his panels. Perceptor had paused in his ministrations, as if waiting for Rodimus’s negative ping. Rodimus squirmed, the discomfort of his spike aching for freedom leaving a warm feeling in his tanks. The captain’s faceplate flared with embarrassment at Perceptor’s amused hum.

[Did you know that your receptors for pain and pleasure are much more linked than average?-P]

Rodimus attempted an annoyed growl. He only embarrassed himself further at the pained whimper it turned into. He onlined his optics to glare at the scientist pointedly.

[What are you implying, Percey?- R]

Perceptor didn’t respond, but Rodimus caught the pleased smirk he’d allowed himself as he tapped away on his datapad.

[Action input- Test- Pain reaction- 10%]

[Action input- Test- Pleasure reaction- 50%]

Rodimus let out another pained moan, his plating tingling and stinging with charge. His array ached. His processor felt fuzzy, optics flickering again as his frame twitched. He rutted his hips up at nothing, only succeeding in shaking the table when he went despondently limp. He keened as the sensation left him. He thought he might dent the table with how tightly he squeezed it. Rodimus only whined louder when the command was retracted, his frame buzzing with remnants of false pain and pleasure with no real source.

[You make such a fascinating subject, Rodimus-P]

Rodimus wheezed out another mouthful of steam.

[Your pleasure centers are connected to some unorthodox stimulus, did you know that?-P]

Rodimus fought to get his words together, willing his mind to put together a response as he cleared and reset his vocalizer. “W-what?” He croaked out dumbly.

[Don’t worry about it.-P]

[Action input- Sensory stimulus reaction- Anterior node- 75%]

Rodimus’s back arched up off the table. An animalistic, glitching howl escaped his throat. His optics fritzed and went offline again, legs kicking and twitching. “O-OH- FRAG!” He shouted out, reaching to desperately paw at his panels. “G-GOD- Percey-!!” Rodimus’s hips bucked and jumped, chasing the phantom stimulation the only way he knew how as it drew him closer and closer to an edge.

[Action input- Sensory stimulus reaction- Valve calipers(All)- 80%]

“PERCEY-!”

[Action input- Sensory stimulus reaction- Spike- 50%]

His helm clanged against the worktable, half drowned out by the desperate wail he let out. “I’m- S-SLAG- Oh- Primus- Perceptor- I’m gonna-” Rodimus babbled, his voice glitching desperately.

He screamed in despair as the stimulus was ripped back from him. Perceptor canceled the codes, leaving Rodimus twitching and steaming with frustration.

“C-Come on- Perceptor-!! Please- frag- I was SO close!!” Rodimus cried, turning his helm to give the scientist his very best puppydog eyes. Perceptor simply reached out and disconnected his diagnostic cord from Rodimus’s neck port, biting back a cruel smile.

“I know, I can’t have you leaking all over my table.” He said curtly, opening a drawer and plucking out a fresh dataslug to plug into his pad. Rodimus watched his digits deftly working at the datapad, considering how a set of dextrous digits like that would be better served attending to his aching array. Rodimus swallowed dryly, rubbing his legs together.

After a brief moment of silence, Perceptor unplugged the dataslug and handed it to Rodimus. “There we are. This should suffice in bringing you as many overloads as your spark desires.” He said. “You’ll want to plug this into your interfacing ports rather than your diagnostics for the best effect.”

Rodimus sat up, hopping off the edge of the work table. “Thanks again… sorry for um… y’know.” He waved his servo implicatively.

Perceptor smiled. “Not to worry captain. I’d be happy to work in your processor again sometime.”

Rodimus didn’t like how that offer made him feel. “Cool.” He said, before turning and beginning to wander off out of the lab with his prize in hand.

Rodimus quivered, clamping a servo over his intake as the feelings wracked through his frame. It had taken him only as long as it took to return to his habsuite, close the door, and lay himself out on his berth to plug that dataslug into the port on the back of his helm. He’d half expected it to be a quick thrill, a program to get him off and be done with it.

He was endlessly thankful that it wasn’t.

Waves of intense sensation rolled down his frame, leaving Rodimus slick with coolant and rapt in intense pleasure. He could feel each sensation like someone was spiking him better than he’d ever felt before, calipers cycling and shifting in perfect rhythm, mimicking the intense feeling of being stretched. The tactile sensors on his spike lit up one after the other as if it were being stroked.

“Oohh- f-frag-” Rodimus moaned through his digits. Drool was slick on his dermas, steam creeping through his knuckles as the intensity slowly began to mount. Rodimus’s optics glitched and flickered. He’d have to consider plugging like this more often.

He keened as he finally felt the code engage his anterior node, his frame glitching with charge. Finally, finally, after days with no release- The code engaged all sensors at once, and Rodimus threw his helm back against the berth-

*CRUNCH!*

All the sensations stopped. Rodimus wheezed and panted, frantically glancing around. No- What- He reached a servo around to the back of his helm, pawing for the-

His digits came away clutching the smashed dataslug.

Rodimus wailed in anguish at his misfortune. He felt like he was going to weep, all hope of overload dashed at his pedes in seconds by his traitorous frame. Rodimus buried his face in his servos, screaming into his palms and kicking at the air in frustration.

Two cycles passed. Doubletap, Railspike, and Pincher got checked off Rodimus’s meetings list. Rodimus seethed each moment he spent in Ultra Magnus’ presence. He swore how pent up he was would trigger any latent outlier powers any day now, allowing him to really and truly burn holes in his plating with his hateful glare.

And what was worse, the longer he spent like this, the more desirable the other mech was to him. He had convinced himself that it was a matter of ‘taking Ultra Magnus down a few pegs’ when he fantasized about the other mech, however, it was hard to keep his mind from wandering, and his plating from heating, when he remembered who had been the cause of his torture.

It was when Rodimus caught himself pretending the spike in his mouth was Magnus’s and not Fervors during their one on one that he finally decided to swallow his pride and make the agonizing walk of shame back to the lab to beg for the scientists’ help again.

#my art #valveplug #transformers #my fic #rodimus/perceptor #rodimus #perceptor #mtmte #maccadam #/nsfw

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