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#maybe she is a part of me? like the hurt part? idk and i cant cope with those memories so she blocks them out?
oatbugs · 18 days
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the forest looks like heaven today i woke up feeling the heaviest weight at the top of my heart
#yesterday on the study they said they were dating two others and it was going well and i cant imagine fucking you but#you have great tits. they got upset at me not inviting them to a party. my research partner told me to write a 1000 word essay on why they#should come. they spoke about how much they wanted theiir ex and they wouldnt tell me much about who theyre dating bc#they thought i still had feelings for them which. god. theyre right but the assumption is so arrogant#the streams r rly beautiful im walking to a date and shes gorgeous and some of my friends know her but i look#exactly like ive slept on my friends floor for the past few days so . aaa anyway#god after that whole call i just felt so deflated like i felt over it but now its all . back. like seeing them being happy w smn else#inflicts active misery upon me which means ii think im becoming a worse person bc of them. i called my friend and i just . idk i walked home#i kept wanting to weep but . woah the sun is so pretty#there are petals and dandelion seeds floating in the air#med school students walking to their lectures#she does biochem btw. the person im meeting now#there are two butterflies dancing together. i cant make this shit up the past few days have looked like actual heaven#ive spent them being on survival mode and not even bc of my studies like ok focus on log functions while the person kn the screen#tells u abt how if her ex were to call shed fold immediately and the new girl is a singer and its going well and maybe ill tell you#more abt it in a few months. SO YOU KNOW IT HURTS ! SO WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME YOUD MAKE OUT W ME AT THE CLUB WHY WOULD U FALL ASLEEP NEXT TO#ME WITHOUT CLOTHES ON ! WHY WOULD YOU CARESS YOUR OWN SKIN LOOKING AT ME IN THE MIRROR !!!!#anyway im like . sane.#i just . felt like it was over#i realised i kept seeing ppl who i thought were more attractive etc etc than her bc i needed to prove to myself#that im attractive enough to be liked or that i can be liked at all and a part of me wanted to prove it to them too#its just a horrible mindset to have and yh not only do they not care but they also bring out the worst in me actively like . I DONT KNOW#BUT THEN WHO ELSE KNOWS THAT THE GOLDEN HOURS IN TEHRAN ARE PINK AND LILAC WHO GOES TO TECHNO RAVES AT THE BASE OF DAMAVAND#WHO CAN PIN YOU AGAINST A WALL LIKE THEM !!!#anyway#standing up it just feels so#exhausting#like this the most exhausted ive felt from all this ever
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oughh......
#laya plays dragon age#da2#oc: liam hawke#this happened a bit ago already & i wanted to draw sth for it but idk if i will finish that#but i gotta yell abt them anyway because OGH.#i have a lot of emotions about this quest ok#bartrand was the perfect scapegoat he was perfect to direct all the rage and pain at all these years#years of imagining gleeful revenge while bartrand is gloating and laughing like an evil soulless bastard#and then you meet him and he is just. a pathetic husk of a man with barely any own will left#and whats worse. varric is so so torn up about it#varric. the guy who never makes anything about him and who will always handwave and joke when something hits too close to home#drops all efforts to be smart and is just. desperate. begs hawke to not kill his brother#and liam wants to want bartrand dead so bad. he wishes he could look him in the eye and enjoy taking his life#and he knows varric will listen to him if he insisted. he knows when it comes down it it varric will yield to his decision#but he sees this broken guy who is barely the villain he kept projecting onto him and he sees varric and he sees two doomed siblings#and knows what its like to lose your sibling to your own blade#and he cant do it#and he hates it so much. but he wont do it.#and its the reason why i cant decide who dealt the killing blow for bethany bc it makes this scene juicy in different ways#if varric kills bethy its equally wanting to spare each other their siblings blood on their hands#as it is taking some form of revenge (on liams part). we both killed each others siblings. now we are even#the revenge part would still be there if liam did the blow on bethany himself. you made me do that and now i will take bartrand for it#but its also much more i know what its like. i wont make go through that too#if varric killed bethy and then also bartrand it would be more#''its my fault she is dead. i will take the revenge she/you deserves if you tell me to even though it will hurt me#dunno. all good variations i will. have to rotate them in my head more#or maybe just never decide idk they can be in canon limbo forever#anyways thats it for shouting into the void about them for now it Will happen again
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skunkg1rll · 1 month
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im in love w him not only bc of who he is as a person nd how drawn i am to his personality, but also bc i feel like he's the only one who has ever wanted to see me. who i am, like deep down. he's the only one who i feel like i've ever connected with, in an easy nd genuine way. the only one who i feel has ever gotten me. he's the only one who's ever made me feel like we actually have a connection we're both in on, bc i havent had to pretend or put up a fake front for him bc he wanted the real image of me.
#unfortunately he has his own shit to deal w#so bc of one thing that was actually a mistake from me#he misjudged it nd saw it from his own perspective nd didnt understand mine#nd thus concluded that he saw me wrong nd didnt actually know who i am#nd then he had decided that so strongly he wasnt wven open to hear me out or try to understand what that situation was for me#that made me very sad nd hurt nd like#he doesnt actually like me as much as i like him#bc i would always always ask him nd hear him out before jumping to conclusions#i have asked him abt this but he is a wall nd doesnt wnna talk abt it#nd i cant force anyone so... yeh. it is what it is#i wish that we had the connection where he wanted to understandwhere i was coming from#instead of being like ughshe isnt the perfect image that i had constructed#so now im writing her off completely bc she doesntlive up to my expectations#but... my heart just loves him sm i can look past that#however... that is meaningless when i dont even know what he feels for me nd i cant get an answer out of him#maybe he doesnt wanna tell me bc he doesnt return my love nd he knows i'llbe hurt nd he'll risk losing me as a friend#i'd never stop talking to him tho.. that is the worst part#if imginna get over these feelings#i need to hear it straight from him. i need him to tell me thatno i am not in love with you#then i need to never talk to him again nd never lookat his social media#then it will hurt a lot but after a year or so i will only feel empty nd not hurt when i think of him#but i am tooweak to be the one to stop talking to him now#my entire day revolves around him nd i know its unhealthy but idk how to stop#since this obsession is unrequited i dont actually wanna feel it#but i have no idea how to stop#god this is driving me insane wtf is wrong w me??
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dying-weeds · 2 months
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Tw talking about my memory issues
So recently I've found that within the last year or so some of my traumatic memories don't feel like mine anymore. Like I know they are mine because know those things happened to me, but they don't feel like mine and when I get flashbacks of them I can't feel anything.
It's like they happened to someone else and she isn't me but I'm keeping them for her. Idk why I feel like that's the best way to describe it. That's how most of the affected memories feel the majority of the time.
There are sometimes though where I get flashbacks of those affected memories and I feel them very strongly and the emotions and pain is too much and it's like it all just shuts down. After that I can't feel anything again which is also weird to me.
I don't really understand what this is because it all started a year ago. I mean I know it's dissociation but why can I no longer identify with those specific memories though? I mean I have other ones too that don't feel that way and I feel them fully but those ones in particular I just cant.
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cestacruz · 2 months
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Mmm Jeanne
#servants cant learn new stuff (i'll talk about jalter in a second) therefore#jeanne shouldnt know how to read or write#we actually Dont get a confirmation that she can do those things in summer 3. because the book that jalter thought jeanne wrote#was actually Her own book#jeanne works with marie. maybe she comes up with the ideas and does rough drawings that marie would be Delighted to bring to life#marie reads to jeanne is my image#jalter taught herself how to read and write and i think that was possible because of the unstability of her existence#if you try to teach jeanne how to read and write it will stick for a second but if like idk 15-20 min pass she would likely find herself#unable to read again and her writting to be suboptimal#she can sign her own name ofc thats historical#she can recite the bible from memory iirc#i love jalter's ability to be her own person even if it comes with the fact that she is very much. an ephemeral dream#like her FCKING SKILL IS CALLED.#WHY MUST YOU HURT ME LIKE THIS FGO#anyway. now jeanne again but physical#oughhh thank u for the support in the tags when i said jeanne should have self image issues because she looked different in life#i hadnt fully talked bout it i just went with hair but yeah. i need to check again because im pretty sure her body wasnt Suuuper different#but i just gotta confirm#but im just so i love the idea of her just not liking the way she manifested abd not knowing Why she manifested like that#when there are Countless depictions of her with her short brown hair#sieg looks to the side whistling (its not his fault but he knows the pseudo servant part#and its probably a mix of . fate apocrypha's manifestation and of how some people imagined jeanne looked like#but it still upsets her#not that she'd ever complain to people#you can probably get it out of her tho#unrelated and only to those who reached this far: im thinking of a singularity set in 15th century orleans in the Middle of the hundred year#war. but the difference aint “oh jeanne d'arc came back to life evil” rather than “there seems to be a battle here where it shouldnt and oh#my god is that jeanne- oh god jeanne d'arc fucking died--#and chaldeas has to try and fix the war without living breathing jeanne d'arc#actually thats not the middle of the 100yearwar but yknow what i mean. also haha jk unless...
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opens-up-4-nobody · 11 months
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...
#ugh. i wasted a lot of time and money today#bc my leg was suddenly hurting a lot more today and it kinda freaked me out so i went to urgent care#and then they had me get an x ray. luckily my hip looks fine and like i thought i probably strained or tore like an adductor muscle#so all that for something i already knew. but she said i should just chill for like 3 weeks and let it heal#at least nothing worse was wrong but its really annoying. i want to run 😫#wtf am i gonna do to dispel energy??? ugh. and i was supposed to go to thr post office today to send stuff#ill have to go tomorrow. bleh. its so annoying#part of it is just that i hate having to interact with people. like talking to people. like im sure i come across as v young#bc im so anxious and hesitant and im like zero eye contact. so idk it just feels kinda embarrassing#i wanna b like. bro i promis im not stupid. i have 2 advanced degrees in biology and im going for a 3rd. u can talk to me like an adult#its probably just me projecting. my perception is distorted from being made fun of by my sister lol#whatever. at least its just 3 weeks. tho it does remind me i havent been to an actual doctor in like 5 years#...probably should do thst before i move. or idk maybe ill just wait a month and go before school starts#ugh. fuck the American Healthcare system. they looked at me for like 5min and to go to urgent care was $125 with my insurance#thats just to b seen. like i can afford that but what r u supposed to do if u cant?#unrelated#at least its not as bad as when i passed out in class and took a 10 min ambulance ride that somehow cost $700
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munamania · 1 year
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is it really really stupid to give her the gift. i know she’s not worth it and im making myself feel like shit over and over and i need to stop and it doesnt matter how sad or angry i am about it she’s not just gonna dump him and even if she did i wouldn’t like. want to be the second choice (not that i inherently would be. weirdo dream scenario) and it’s just not gonna affect her much to not see me anymore and i have to be okay with that. and im truthfully not rn but i have to be cause that’s the reality. anyway lost my point there
#like. i just cant imagine class being over monday and just being like. ok bye forever ig. or not rlly saying anything#idk guys im sorry i know ive gone on and on and on nonstop for months#it just sucks#even if i think back to monday like. it's classic baby steps of leading me on and i fortunately for once didnt nip at the bit right away#but just the little ways she looked at me and smiled or joked around. kinda flirty. just for her to yk#post the bereal today and hes in it and its like 'wait let me get a shirt on' so just blatantly fucking yk. didnt even have to do my sleuth#work. and like. i know maybe ive overreacted to a lot of it and over thought it and she really didn't intentionally do a lot of it#and wasn't ever confused or anything and i just told myself that to justify being sooooo bonkers over it. idk#so it's like. with all that in mind. no i should not give it to her i should just walk out of class and not talk to her again#but the wounded part of me the 17 yr old in me is desperately asking why it's so easy for someone to get over me#but she was never into me! or at least not enough yk. she has a boyfriend. and that yk. shouldve been enough#but i got so lost in all these little signs and feelings of tension and#i guess. lol look at me abt to say this. doesnt help to dwell (lol!) but who knows if it was mutual some of those times when it just Felt#tense. yk. or if she just has problems and really liked the ego boost#cause boy did i make it fucking easy to enjoy my attention! and i never ever ever shouldve done all that bc she wasnt mutually engaging#at least not till like. october. and only briefly. and i just. ugh#anyway :( whatever. i know the answer is no. i know it's no i know i shouldnt#but as i was saying. the wounded part of me wishes i could make her feel even a fraction of the hurt or even just fucking regret#but not pity. but regret for being an asshole. if i could just say something as my final word or something and still be dignified#but i just dk how that would happen. so. yeah#hopefully this is one of my runner up last posts about her#film girl saga
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yongseungkim · 1 month
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.
#literally such a big part of me wants to go like#okay well if you and xyz are just friends#like truly just friends and you arent in denial/omitting the truth from me#have u considered maybe just maybe that it looks like you could be leading her on#the amount of time they spend together is kinda nuts#and its so funny cuz yesterday she was like talking about how her brain doesnt make those connections like#two other ppl before they started dating were spending copious amts of time together and i was like dont u see that?#and she was like no?? to me its like what if they just enjoy spending time with each other#and honeslty more than her i looked at xyzs reaction#cuz she looked STRAIGHT at her when they were talking about all that time they spent together.#bro idk i know she doesnt like to think but man she kinda should like#sometimes i think im insane but other times im like yeah if this was any other pairing of two people would def think smth fishy is going on#spending this much time with ONE person bruh like im her roommate now and i dont even spend nearly as much time#and she doesnt really invite me to do things when its the two of them which to me feels slightly weird from time to time#cuz im friends w both of em?? so it unintentionally feels exclusatory but thats okay lol im trying to let go#i know i feel hurt because shes choosing to spend time with xyz person too instead of with me#i know they have a different relationship too where its like both are on the more active side of things so maybe for her shes just like#oh this is my workout friend/buddy can do all the phsyical exercise i want#bc this girl can also keep up with her athletic demands but dear lordie#if she is telling me the truth as she believes it shes either in deep deep denial or shes leading this girl on for real like#they are just always attached at the hip and like the amount of physical affection bw the two has like#skyrocketed in the past month or so its nUTS#bro honestly i need to stop thinking about this and move on i cant keep getting pits in my stomach when i know shes out and about#and prob with xyz person lol
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everybodysaycbx · 7 months
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#cant sleep...#feels weird that its been 10 years now. shes been gone for so long now but i remember it so well#the pains like a phantom pain tho. i can remember her without crying (tho i am now lol) and not all the memories hurt#but the pain isnt always detatched from the memories. that part of my childhood where she was always there feels......idk how to describe it#im always aware that its gone and sometimes i can live with the reality of it and appreciate my friendship with her#but sometimes the hurt comes back so forcefully and so painfully i want to scream and scream#and sometimes it feels like i am but i was just dissociated for a few hours#my family is still.....unsure of how to act when i exhibit pain about this. idk if its from guilt that they didnt help me initially or...#is it annoyance that this still affects me...maybe both. guess they cant get how my friends suicide when we were in high school would hurt#whether they feel guilty for how they didnt help it doesnt really matter ig bc i know they wont apologize no matter how much id like them to#idk what to do about it tho. i dont think i can just get over that at this point i mean ive waited 10 years#if anyone has advice dm me ig but dont tell me to let it go bc i just cant#ive made my peace with any culpability i have in her death and if her spirit harbors anger with me then thats fine#her family doesnt and has never seemed upset with me so i have no reason to be thinking it but idk. i just couldve done more#but whats done is done and dwelling on what couldve been is a bad road to go on. esp at almost 3 am#i hope and wish for her to be at peace and everyone who loved her to find it if they havent yet#if anyone else has had to go through this too know you can talk to me esp if you dont have anyone else#i had really no one i could talk to about it without feeling like i was burdening everyone else who was in the same situation at the time#and i dont want anyone else to feel like that so. i hope everyones well#otherwise if that doesnt apply to you but you want to cheer me up send me some cute videos or memes or whatever#ive been trying to keep my mind off it for the most part since ive had to work and dont want to have a breakdown there lol#and i have to work tonight so that would be helpful#but anyway i think thats enough of my rambling and depressing thoughts#tw: death#tw: suicide
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tinylittlebab · 1 year
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:/
#ugh. i was supposed to go to the store an hour ago#my sister was out so i cant get there and im v upset cause i couldve been skipping around the garage while they were gone#im glad the main thing i have been coping with for the past 7 years is daydreaming and that i skip around while doing it#exercise tends to be difficult bc im hypermobile and a lit of excercise tends to make it worse which is really really bad#like. no amount of control and feeling good vc im starving myself is worth making my joints even worse#one of my shoulders already likes to partially dislocate just whenever and like. it hurts and sucks and i dont wanna make that worse#well. ill have lots of time to skip around soon bc the person with the car is gna be gone for a few days so the garage will be empty :D#i can use it at night when they are here but its less fun and i burn less calories so i prefer when its empty#i usually use it while both ppl are at work but they dont work friday and saturday so it tends to be bleh those days#idk. im glad that my favorite thing to do also burn calories bc i enjoy it unrelated to my ed so its less stressful#i was debating not eating till 7pm but i have such a headache ao i think ill eat some fruit. idk. my sister knows im relapsing so she might#suggest we eat something while were out. idk how she does it but she usually convinces me to which is good i guess#im not happy abt it bc i wanna starve myself but that is objectively a bad thing to be doing and even if im not happy abt it its still good#when i eat stuff. id be more fussed abt it if i knew how much i weighed but i dont have a scale#part of me is like. i dont wanna restrict until i have a scale bc then i cant watch the numbers go down#i know for a lot of people qhen they first start dieting they see quick drop and then it goes very slow and i wanna see that#im just. i dont even care much abt being skinny rn im mostly looking for the nice feeling i get when i watch the number drop#idk. maybe my sister will catch on to how bleh im doing today and suggest i buy something yummy but hopefully not although i do appreciate#when she does that. it feels nice to have someone care abt you
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lxclerc · 2 months
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𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ─ 𝐨𝐛𝟑𝟖
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summary: when max verstappen’s adopted little sister starts soft launching, the whole grid launches an investigation on who it might be
pairing: ollie bearman x f2 driver! max verstappen’s adopted sister! reader
faceclaim: no one in particular
note: i accidentally published this before it was finish so now i’ve completely lost the request but anyways the request really was just about max being reader’s grid dad but i ran with it a little
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ twitter
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.ೃ࿐ yourusername posted on her story!
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landonorris replied to your story: it’s like you have a death wish
yourusername: shut up
landonorris: rest in peace to the unlucky guy 🫡
arthur_leclerc replied to your story: soft launching knowing mad max is your warden is insaneee
yourusername: i just got that dog in me ig
arthur_leclerc: never ever say that again
paularon_ replied to your story: so long, ollie. it was good knowing you, mate ✊
yourusername: so dramatic for no reason
maxverstappen1 replied to your story: that better be just be some stranger you picked up on the side of the road to tie your shoelaces and not a boy you went around japan with when you told me you were only going out with your team
yourusername: remember that you love and adore me and i am 17 years old and can make my own decisions
maxverstappen1: nice try. who is he?
yourusername: no ❤️
ੈ✩‧₊˚ messages
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ੈ✩‧₊˚ instagram
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liked by olliebearman, maxverstappen1, paularon_ and others
yourusername suzuka, youve been very nice to me 🫶
view all comments…
user1 the way she ran to max’s arms after the podium 🥹
user2 a red bull girl with her red bull dad
user3 so we’re not going to talk about the 3rd pic?
maxverstappen1 who is he and why are you going on dates without telling anyone? what if something happens to you and no one knows where you are or who you’re with?
↳ yourusername calm down, we were with the team 🙄
↳ user4 overprotective dad max is so adorable i cant lie
↳ user5 if they were with the team, does that mean the guy’s also part of the team? another driver maybe?
↳ user6 user5 youre onto something
victoriaverstappen je bent geweldig, mijn meisje. blijf stralen ❤️ (you are amazing, my girl. keep on shining.)
↳ yourusername ik hou zielsveel van je, v 💕 (i love and adore you to bits, v)
paularon_ congrats or whatever
↳ yourusername jealousy doesnt suit you
↳ paularon_ nvm fck u 💕
arthur_leclerc stop winning
↳ yourusername get a seat first ❤️
olliebearman congratulations, yn! another trophy to bring home ❤️
↳ yourusername thank you, ollie!
use7 the difference between paul and arthur then ollie bye i love their friendship 😭
landonorris girlll who is heeeee
↳ yourusername no ❤️
↳ charles_leclerc come on, at least give us a clue
↳ carlossainz55 is he also a driver? what team does he driver for?
↳ yourusername yall are grown ass men way too interested in a teenager’s love life. absorb some sunlight
↳ user8 she gagged yall im afraid 😭
ੈ✩‧₊˚ messages
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ੈ✩‧₊˚ instagram
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liked by olliebearman, paularon_, arthur_leclerc and others
yourusername hello, lover ❤️
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olliebearman my girl ❤️❤️
olliebearman love you to the moon and to saturn 💫
↳ yourusername buzz lightyear’s got nothing on us frfr
↳ arthur_leclerc why can’t you be normal?
↳ yourusername ollie loves me with all the weirdness and shit
↳ olliebearman yeah that’s about right
↳ arthur_leclerc 🤮🤮
↳ user1 arthur is your regular third wheel bff
paularon_ ollie’s trying to keep his cool in the comments but he’s red as a tomato
↳ olliebearman shut the hell up no im not
↳ yourusername youre not? 🥹
↳ olliebearman i mean of course i am got me giggling and shit too
↳ paularon_ you’re both disgusting
user2 arthur and paul are so over them 😭
user3 i fucking knew the back of that head was familiar!!!!
user4 oh? OH!
user5 idk what hurts more. the fact that i no longer have a chance with ollie or the fact that i no longer have a chance with yn
user6 waiting for max’s comment
maxverstappen1 you better watch it the next time you step in for either carlos or charles, bearman 🙂
↳ yourusername you promised
↳ maxverstappen1 i promise i’ll carve charles’ appendix out myself so ollie and i can face each other on track man to man
↳ olliebearman i- sir?
↳ charles_leclerc mate, what the fuck did i do to you
↳ yourusername maxie come on. you promised me you’d be nice
↳ maxverstappen1 fine 🙄
maxverstappen1 dinner’s at 8 on tuesday. don’t be late
↳ olliebearman yes, sir 🫡
user7 not charles getting dragged into it 😭😭
↳ user8 max is just completely unable to go through a conversation without mentioning charles ♡ liked by yourusername
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liked by victoriaverstappen, olliebearman and others
yourusername it was truly unfortunate for max to find out that his cat is also now in love with ollie
view all comments…
user1 omg sophie and victoria also joined the dinner 😭
↳ user2 girlie really introduced her to the whole family
↳ yourusername well actually max invited them along to try and intimidate ollie but jokes on him, they loved him
↳ user3 yn and ollie to max when vic and sophie ended up loving ollie: oh how the turntables
maxverstappen1 sassy is NOT in love with a ferrari driver
↳ yourusername one thing you, sassy and i have in common with
↳ user4 yn truly is just a lestappen truther
olliebearman sassy 🫶
↳ yourusername oh i guess ill just die then
↳ olliebearman my love beautiful angel girlfriend yn ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
↳ yourusername better
↳ arthur_leclerc did you just get jealous over a cat?
↳ yourusername did you really just lose your seat?
↳ yourusername it’ll get old when you get your seat back
↳ arthur_leclerc that’s getting old 🙄
user5 each and every day, arthur tries to come for yn’s neck and each and every day, yn gags him
paularon_ olliebearman in a scale of 1-10, how scary is it to face mad max head on?
↳ olliebearman just peachy 👍 (i nearly shat my pants)
charles_leclerc does this mean that max’s promise is null and void?
↳ maxverstappen1 none of you figured out who it is 🤷
↳ yourusername what promise?
↳ maxverstappen1 ….nothing
landonorris i can’t believe we didn’t figure out it’d be bearman
↳ george_russell it seems so obvious now
↳ alex_albon i asked him straight on and he lied to my face
↳ olliebearman i was terrified max would find a way to run me over with his rocketship if i even dare utter it
↳ alex_albon yk what absolutely valid
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also this turned out wayy longer than i meant it to which is why it took so long.
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nvrsaidiwasinurcloset · 2 months
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okay hi just a warning rq my autocorrect is off bc it autocorrected my friend’s name to fuckin malayalam on accident. i dont like autocorrect.
ANYWAY! ive been listening to my lovely olivia rodrigo lately, specifically her new song obsessed. i wanted to know if you could make a fic with Ethan x fem! reader where readers bitchy friend has this ex (Ethan) and she made him out to be a real dick. like, manipulating and everything.
reader eventually meets him and it turns out that she remembers… a lot about him considering her friend is a constant yapper and cant shut up about him. Ethan actually turns out to be a real cutie patootie and could literally never hurt anyone.
a few days later theyd meet again at some club or party maybe where they end up hitting it off… a little too well.. yeah so she ends up in his bed (smut part, very dom ethan plspls 😛😛). they could be talking about something really random and then reader brings up how her friend basically completely lied about him and said he was a piece of shit when he really wasnt. like a realllll fluffy end before a small cliffhanger thats never gonna get finished where her friend ends up finding out and texting her.
so sorry if thats too long or confusing idk but i actually love your work so much im lowkey your #1 fan. 😍😍😍
HELLO! I switched this up a little, I hope that's okay! 💕
Also, I fucking loved the 'leave it on a cliffhanger part that won't get finished' because WHY IS THAT WHAT I DO lmao
Obsessed - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader - Part 1
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This contains SMUT - Minors DNI
Part 2
Summary: Your friend told you horrible lies about her ex-boyfriend, and once you get to know him, you realize he's not the monster she made him out to be.
Contains: Mentions of a toxic relationship, Dom-ish cocky Ethan, rough-ish sex, oral - f receiving, p in v, fluff (If I missed anything, PLEASE let me know. I'm sleep deprived atm)
A/N: This was the one that pulled me out of my writers block, lmao. It's still not where I want it to be, but I'm TRYING. I'll try to post more this week, but I will be busy so bear with me haha.
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You didn’t know Ethan Landry, but you knew you didn’t like him. He used to date one of your friends, and after hearing all the horrible things he’d said and done during their relationship, you thought he was really scummy.
They dated in high school and couldn’t get enough of each other, so they wanted to go to the same college. They broke up right before freshman year started, and after almost a year, she still talked about him every chance she got. She’d tell you how controlling he was. The things he’d call her when he was mad. How he cheated on her. You couldn’t believe that she stayed in the relationship for as long as she did, because she never had anything good to say, except that she loved him.
You’d seen pictures of him, and after walking into one of your classes at the start of the new semester, you saw him in person for the first time. He was so shy as he took his seat in the lecture hall, some of the girls making their little comments about the rumors they’d heard about him. He didn’t seem like the type that would do the things your friend said, but maybe he was just really good at playing innocent. All you knew was that you needed to keep your distance from him.
When you met up with your friend later that day for lunch, you didn’t know if you wanted to bring up Ethan being in the same class as you, but once she brought him up, you decided to tell her.
“Speaking of Ethan…I saw him today,” you said, before taking a bite of your food. Her face dropped as she looked at you.
“Where did you see him?” she questioned. You explained that you saw him in one of your new classes, and she rolled her eyes. “Can you believe he still tries to text me?”
“What I can’t believe is that you haven’t blocked him,” you said, “I know I’d hate to see someone that treated me like shit’s name pop up on my phone.”
She started to giggle as you curiously stared at her. “I have him saved in my phone as ‘Tall loser with a small dick’, so I laugh every time he does text me.”
“That’s not toxic at all,” you said, as you started to think about what she’d said. “Wait, he treated you as bad as he did and has a small dick? What the fuck were you thinking?”
“All he had going for him was that he was cute,” she said, “But seriously, if I were you, I’d stay away from him.”
“Oh, please. Like I’d even want to be near him.”
Your morning wasn’t going as expected. You slept through all of your alarms; you didn’t have time to stop for coffee. You didn’t think your day could get any worse, until you walked into class and noticed the only empty seat available was beside Ethan. You took a deep breath before you walked over and sat down. Once you reached into your backpack, you realized that your laptop wasn’t there. You were in such a hurry when you ran out of your dorm and didn’t even think to grab it.
“Shit,” you whispered, “I’m so stupid.”
“Here,” Ethan said, passing you a notebook and a pen. You curiously looked at him as he offered a weak smile. “I always keep an extra notebook, just in case.”
“Thanks,” you said, a half-smile playing on your lips.
Once class started, you were taking your notes, but you kept glancing over to Ethan. He was so focused on typing that he didn’t notice, but you couldn’t help but wonder if everything your friend told you was true. At that moment, he didn’t seem like a jerk. Then again, he had only spoken a handful of words to you.
Ethan was aware of all the things that were said about him. He hoped that after a few weeks it all would’ve blown over, but once you have an angry ex-girlfriend paint you as some horrible, emotionally abusive asshole, it’s hard to come back from that. He knew that it was best for him to just keep his head down until he was able to transfer to a different school, where no one knew who he was. He was miserable at Blackmore, and he really had no reason to stick around, aside from the few friends he’d made.
After class was over, you tore the pages of notes you’d taken from the notebook to give it back to Ethan.
“Thanks again,” you said, as you handed it back to him.
“You’re welcome,” he said, shoving it back in his backpack. “I thought about just emailing you my notes, but I didn’t know if you’d want that.”
“You’re telling me I didn’t have to spend the last hour trying to write that fast?” you asked, as he flashed you a sweet, genuine smile. “Why wouldn’t someone want that?”
“I don’t know, maybe it’s because most people here hate me,” he said, sliding the straps of his backpack over his shoulders. “You’ve probably heard things about me.”
“Yeah…are they true?” you asked, as he shook his head.
“You’re the first person that’s asked me that. Everyone else just assumes everything is true,” he sighed, “But no, I’m not a bad person.”
You started to feel so guilty. You’d said plenty of bad things about him, but you only heard one side of the story. With your friends’ story changing so many times, getting more dramatic each time she told it, you were starting to realize that it was all bullshit. You still didn’t know exactly what happened, but you were curious to know what the truth was.
“You okay?” Ethan asked, noticing that you were lost in thought as you stood in front of him.
“I’m friends with your ex,” you said, as his smile slowly fell. “What’s the real story?”
He sat back down in his seat as the other students piled out of the room. You sat beside him as you waited for him to speak.
“I really loved her…but she was just so controlling. Then she cheated on me when she went to the beach with her family. I didn’t find out about that until right before we started college,” he said, looking over to you. “She was pissed that I broke up with her, then all these horrible things about me started going around.”
“That’s fucked up,” you said, as he nodded.
“Yeah, she’s still been trying to text me. I finally blocked her a few days ago.”
“Wait, she said you’ve been trying to text her,” you said, his eyes growing wide at your words.
“Her number’s been deleted from my phone for months. I have no interest in talking to her,” he said, “I know this must be weird for you since you are her friend, but I think it’s cool that you wanted to hear me out.”
“Well, I feel like I need to apologize…I’ve said some things about you that weren’t true.”
“She’s a good liar. She has almost the entire school hating me so it doesn’t surprise me that her friend does, too,” he said, as he stood back up.
“I don’t hate you,” you said, smiling at him. “I don’t know if you’d want to, and I know she’d kill me, but if you ever want to hang out sometime, let me know.”
“I’d like that.”
Ethan was kicking himself for not asking you for your number, or shit, even your social media so he could DM you. He thought you were beautiful, but he knew that hoping for a chance with you would be a reach. He really just needed more people in his life that believed him to make the time he still had at the university more enjoyable.
Your friend begged you to come to a random frat party that you didn’t feel like going to in the first place. After your talk with Ethan, you weren’t even sure you wanted to be around her. You still went, and after searching for her for almost an hour, you checked your phone to see a message from her that she wasn’t coming, and that she ran into one of the guys she’d been hooking up with on the way to the party.
“Why the fuck am I even here?” you said to yourself as you locked your phone and slid it into the back pocket of your jeans.
“Hopefully to hang out with me, if your offer’s still good,” you heard from behind you, recognizing Ethan’s voice.
“Hey,” you said as you turned to face him. “I didn’t expect to see the most hated man on campus here.”
“My roommate told me that if I stayed in my dorm tonight, he’d throw my Xbox out the window,” he said, glancing over to the muscular guy that was watching Ethan talk to you.
“Ah, so you were threatened into being social,” you said, as he started to laugh.
“I guess you could say that. Do you want a drink?”
“Sure.”
Ethan wasn’t much of a drinker; you could tell by the sour look on his face every time he took a sip. It gave him a little confidence though, as the two of you talked and got to know each other a little better.
“I don’t think I can drink this anymore,” he said, sitting the cup down on a table. You sat yours down too, and as soon as you did, someone bumped into you, shoving you into Ethan.
“Shit, I’m sorry,” you said, looking up at him. Your chest was pressed closely against his, his hands on your hips from catching you.
“Don’t be sorry,” he said, “You can stay this close to me all night, if you want.”
“Are you always this smooth? Or is it the alcohol?” you questioned as he smirked at you.
“I’m only buzzed,” he said, before he leaned down, placing his lips on yours.
Chad was still watching Ethan from afar, cheering and thrusting his fist in the air once he saw Ethan kiss you. He started to laugh against your lips before he pulled away to stare daggers through his roommate for interrupting the moment.
“I can’t take him anywhere,” Ethan said, as you smiled at him.
“We could go somewhere more private,” you suggested, as he took your hand in his.
“Want to go back to my dorm? He’ll be here for a while so I know we can talk without being interrupted.”
“Sure!”
Once you made it back to Ethan’s dorm, you were starting to think that he really did just want to talk. You enjoyed listening to him, though. He was telling you about all his hobbies and interests, and you were telling him yours. You started to glance around his side of the dorm room, noticing the cliché, dorky things you’d expect to see.
“Nice Star Wars poster, nerd,” you joked, as he smirked at you.
“Oh, I’m a nerd?” he said, as he nudged you back on his bed. He was hovering over you, his mouth inches from yours. The sexual tension got so thick as his eyes looked into yours, his hand rubbing your hip.
“Mhm,” you said, the corner of your bottom lip in between your teeth. “A hot nerd.”
He felt his cheeks start to heat up, and he really didn’t want you to notice, so he leaned down to finally connect his lips to yours. It didn’t take long for the kiss to get more intense, his tongue brushing across your bottom lip. You let him deepen the kiss, his tongue moving with yours as his hands started to roam. You whimpered into the kiss once his hand squeezed your thigh, your hips started to squirm underneath him.
He pulled away but still stayed close so the two of you could catch your breath. You were reading each other’s faces, and it was obvious that you both wanted more.
“How far do you want this to go?” he asked, his breathing still heavy as his eyes looked into yours.
“As far as you want,” you said, your sweet tone making him groan.
“That’s not what I asked you,” he said, as he leaned back down to kiss your neck. His curls were tickling you, but the only reaction you had were the soft moans slipping past your lips from how well his mouth moved. His hips were rutting into yours, showing you how hard he was for you.
“I want you to fuck me,” you said, as he pulled away to look at you.
“You sure?”
“Mhm.”
Ethan was a little, well, very eager. He got you undressed in what felt like seconds, leaving you in just your panties. Once he stripped down to just his boxers, you got a little curious. You glanced down to see his hard cock straining against the fabric, and started to laugh to yourself, your gaze going to the ceiling.
“What’s funny?” he asked, as he hovered back over you to take one of your nipples in his mouth. Your laughing stopped, a gasp slipping out when he started to suck. “I asked you a question,” he teased, before moving to the other side.
“She really does lie about everything,” you said, as his tongue swirled. “She said you had a small dick.”
He started to laugh against you, before he pulled back. “That’s funny, because she couldn’t take it.”
“I can,” you said, his smile turning to a smirk as his hand trailed down your body to rub you over your panties.
“We’ll see about that,” he said, as he moved lower down the bed to position himself between your thighs.
He slid your panties down your legs, before running his fingers over your wet pussy. Your eyes stayed on him, your bottom lip in between your teeth as he teased you. Your anticipation just kept building as he moved down the bed, positioning himself in between your thighs. He leaned in, slipping his tongue inside your entrance.
He was sloppily eating you out, his head moving from side to side. His arms hooked under your thighs to pull you as close to his face as he could as your hands went to his hair.
“So good,” you whimpered, your breathing getting faster as he worked you closer to your orgasm.
He slid his tongue out of you to focus on your clit, quickly replacing it with two of his fingers. Your back was arching off the bed as he moved his arm back and forth, applying as much pressure as he could to that spongy spot inside you as he sucked on your swollen bundle of nerves.
“You’re gonna make me cum,” you babbled, as he started to chuckle with your clit in his mouth.
That was all it took for your legs to start shaking and your grip on his hair getting even tighter. Once your pussy started to clench around him, he slowed his fingers to a slow roll, not wanting to overstimulate you. His tongue gently licked your clit as he worked you through it, your whimpers getting softer as you came down from your high.
“That was the best orgasm I’ve ever had,” you admitted through your shaky breathing. Ethan started to laugh a little as you looked at him, your eyes hazy. “What?”
“Just wait until I’m inside you,” he cockily said, “You still confident that you can handle it?”
“I know I can,” you said, your legs instinctively spreading wide for him as his fingertips ran up your thigh.
“What are you going to do when no one else can make you feel as good as I do?” he questioned, as one of his fingers started to rub circles on your clit.
“I guess I’d have to keep you around then,” you said, as he shook his head.
“You’d only have me until summer starts,” he said, his finger moving faster. “I’m transferring to a different school after this year.”
“No, you’re not..fuck. I’ll convince you to stay,” you said, relaxing into the bed as he teased you.
Ethan pulled his hand away from your pussy before he slid his boxers off. He crawled back on top of you and reached over to his bedside table to grab a condom.
“I might let you convince me,” he said, as he lined up with your entrance. You tensed up a little because you knew how big he was. “Relax, baby.”
You did as he said, taking a deep breath as he inched his way inside of you. You were moaning as he stretched you out, and when you thought he was all the way in, he just kept going.
“Oh fuck,” you whimpered, feeling so full as he finally came to a stop, wanting to give you plenty of time to adjust. “Told you..Fuck, I told you I could take it,” you said, already struggling to speak.
“Don’t get cocky,” he said, your mouth falling open as he started to move. “I’m going to ruin this pussy.”
“Ruin it,” you said, challenging him as your lusty, hooded eyes connected with his.
It took everything in Ethan to not immediately start pounding into you, but he didn’t want to hurt you. He started slow, your eyebrows already furrowing together, low moans slipping past your lips. The head of his cock hit that special spot every single time, but you needed more. He sped up a little as your legs wrapped around him, your hands gripped tightly around his biceps.
“Maybe you can take it,” he said, his breathing getting heavier. “Can I go faster?”
“Yes,” you whimpered, as his hips moved quicker.
Your brain was starting to turn to mush, the babbles slipping past your lips making absolutely no sense. The only thing your mind could process in that moment was how good Ethan was making you feel. He thought you were adorable, already so cock drunk, and he wasn’t even close to being done with you yet. He kept his pace, but occasionally thrust a little harder to see if you could take it, the loud moans slipping past your lips as your nails started to dig into his arms letting him know that you could.
He angled your hips to go even deeper. His pace was a little slow as he made sure you were okay. Your eyes were pleading with him to go faster, because you knew the words weren’t going to come out of your mouth. It was getting so hard for him to hold back, so he finally let go. He started to pound into you so hard that your skin was tingling, all the nerves in your body on edge. Your toes were curling as he slammed into your g-spot, your whimpers turning to cries as you felt your orgasm starting to build. It was hard for you to keep your eyes open, and you were sure Ethan was going to have your nail marks on his arms forever with how hard you were squeezing him.
“Fuck,” was the only word you were able to get out, your legs wrapping tightly around him as your body started to involuntarily jolt. Ethan was sure that everyone in the surrounding dorm rooms knew what was happening, because you were being so loud. He wasn’t letting up though. He loved that he was making you feel that good.
It only took a few more deep thrusts before your entire body started to tremble, loud whines flooding out of your mouth as the wave of euphoria washed over you. He chased his own orgasm as he fucked you through it, your pussy clenching him so tight that he was moaning himself.
“I’m almost there, baby,” he said, a slight rasp in his voice from all the panting he’d been doing.
You went limp, your grip on his arms and your legs around his waist relaxing as his hips started to falter, a loud groan slipping past his lips as he released into the condom.
He took a minute to catch his breath before he slid out of you. His abs were burning and his arms were sore from your nails, but he quickly got up to take the condom off so he could take care of you.
He crawled in the bed next to you as you adjusted to lay your head on his chest, still so fucked out that it was hard to process your thoughts. Ethan just held you close, his hands softly rubbing over your bare back as you relaxed into his touches.
“You’re okay, right?” he asked, after a few minutes of you not saying anything. You lazily nodded as your hand moved to rub across his chest.
You laid there in silence as you started to think about what’d just happened. You knew your friend was going to be pissed if she ever found out, but did that even matter? She made almost the entire university hate Ethan for things he never did, and it made you sad that he felt like he needed to switch to a different school so he wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore.
“So…” you finally said, “How can I convince you to stay?”
He let out a nervous laugh, not knowing the best way to respond. “I can’t take people talking about me the way they do anymore.”
“Even if I convince everyone that it was all lies?” you questioned, your tone playful as you angled your head to look at him. “I think it’d be awful for you to leave because of her. You could miss out on someone that would treat you right.”
“Someone like you?” he questioned as he looked down at you. You nodded, before he leaned down to kiss you. “You’re good at this whole convincing thing.”
“Does that mean you’ll stay?” you asked, smiling as you sat up to look at him.
“Yeah, as long as you don’t break my heart,” he said, wrapping his arms around you to pull you back down to his chest.
“I won’t.”
You stayed in Ethan’s bed for a couple hours, making plans for all the dates he wanted to take you on. It felt like you’d known him for way longer than just a few days, the two of you having an instant connection. You hated to pull away from him, but you knew you needed to get dressed before his roommate got home.
“It’s late, can I walk you back to your dorm?” he asked, as he started to put his clothes back on.
“I can’t believe I thought you were this horrible monster. You’re so sweet,” you said, as he smiled at you. “Yeah, you can walk me home.”
Ethan walked you to the front door of your building, pulling you into a gentle kiss before he pulled away.
“I’ll text you,” he said, as he started to back away.
“Yeah, let me know when you make it back to your dorm, please,” you said, as he nodded.
When you made it upstairs and got settled into your bed, you heard your phone vibrate as it charged on your bedside table. You grabbed it and saw a goodnight message from Ethan, a huge smile on your face as you responded to him. You were so exhausted from the time you’d spend with him, and you soon felt yourself start to doze off. You heard your phone buzz again, your eyes lazily opening to see if it was Ethan. You took a deep breath once you read the message that was sent to you.
‘Why the fuck were you kissing Ethan at that party?’
456 notes · View notes
jymwahuwu · 7 months
Note
I was wondering. . What if scenario where darling finally escaped jing yuan by dying and jing yuan had felt all emotions at once anger, furry, sadness, despair, agony. He just cant move on from darling he waited and waited for her next reincarnation and. . Finally after so long of waiting she was finally here standing, breathing and alive
And his not so kind once he kidnapped darling once more and had locked her on his (their) shared bedroom then he just basically fucks darling to the hell and back after so long and he makes her cum and darling felt overstimulated and had kept crying to him to slow down and trying to push him away because who in the right mind would suddenly pull a strange onto some person's house then fucks them into oblivion?!
(Basically idk why im horny or maybe its because i have a period idk anymore-)
From Cloud anon!
thank you cloud anon<3 hesitant to write this…but i love the thirsty ending 🫣 for Jing Yuan, if his clingy and sweet side can't keep you… he doesn't mind getting rough…?
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CW: yandere, angst, non-con, kidnapping, overstimulation, (mentioned) death in the past
(The relationship between the reader here and Jing Yuan’s past life is described in a rather vague way. Please DON’T send me requests and comments about angst and take revenge on yandere. I’m tired of receiving those 😭 Please read the rules.)
That's a really rare concept for long living species; life blooms in the spring and withers in the winter. Jing Yuan placed flowers on the coffin, and… still… worked and lived as usual, arranging Luofu's daily affairs at the seat of divine foresight. People whispered- they said, Look. The general is so ruthless. His only lover in centuries had withered like a flower, and he was unmoved.
Jing Yuan knows that he can still live as usual, but there is an empty gap in his heart, which often aches, but he still chooses to keep you in his heart instead of letting time pass by. No loss can cause Jing Yuan to stagnate, he just lives with wounds. He regretted not leaving more holographic records and replayed the few videos you had, over and over again. "mm- Jing Yuan-" Your lips parted slightly, a record of a time when you were so annoyed that you blocked the camera with your hands and giggled while eating ice cream. That was - that was when you liked him, right? The general sometimes wonders - are you tired of him pestering you like that? He apologized, apologized, apologized bitterly - but you wouldn't hear it again. In the end, he still couldn't keep you, you flowed away between his fingers like floating sand. What had hundreds of years left for him?
Reincarnation - Jing Yuan really found you, in another galaxy. In the dim light, you are standing on the street, laughing and chatting with your friends. A familiar frown and a sweet smile, and when talking about interesting topics, the clear and sweet laughter leaked out. Similar facial features, similar movements and expressions are the imprint of the same soul. Jing Yuan suppressed the urge to take you away immediately, knowing that he must first find out your identity in this life. He removes every possible obstacle and takes you away.
Locked up in a room, in the general's mansion. Since you didn't like being able to travel freely among the stars in your previous life.
To you, you who have no information, this is really the cage that abruptly descends. Be sent to the Xianzhou ship by the people of your planet. Your hands are locked with a bunch of locks made of solid space material, but they are wrapped in plush fabric as if to prevent your wrists from getting hurt. The burly man with long white hair, said to be a general named Jing Yuan, caresses your body desperately - desperately. Lots of sticky, dazzling kisses. His tongue dipped into your mouth to search. Tears…tears? This mysterious man doesn't shed tears when you look at him, it's like the tears have dried up. Your thighs and calves were tied together and spread apart, forcing you to expose your most private parts and squirt on his thick fingers for hours. Orgasm is no excuse to stop. After your struggles and twitches, those fingers didn't slow down at all. The cock is buried deep inside you without any suspense after the warm-up is completed. The tight walls contracted and the liquid spread outward.
You are confused - confused, orgasming in pleasure, wanting to push him away (but your hands are tied), asking who he is and why he treats you like this while still maintaining your senses, and all you get is silence. It was the silence of not wanting to repeat the old dreams. From behind, his entire crotch is pressed against your ass, and even your hands are pressed by him, rocking and pounding you back and forth, occasionally kissing your cheek in a daze. Face to face, staring into your eyes, the lower body is closely connected. On top, you were forced to ride him, swinging your waist. From the side, a strong arm lifts one of your legs and slowly inserts it. In front, sucking and servicing that cock for hours. Seed and fluid oozed from the connection. There are two trembling vibrators stuck to your nipples. What a mess.
After making up for some of the love he hadn't had in hundreds of years, the general felt more at ease. Jing Yuan's hands wrapped around your shoulders and waist. You wanted to hate him so much- hate him, but he read you bedtime stories and space. He prepares rich meals for you, toys to relieve your boredom, and kisses your forehead. He promises to take you out, but not now.
Not now.
624 notes · View notes
vauxxy · 2 months
Text
KILLER
spiderman!luke castellan x reader
part 1 || part 2
★ "i am sick of the chase but i'm hungry for blood, and theres nothing i can do"
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ABOUT - luke castellan is new york's very own 'friendly neighbourhood spider-man'- because of course he fuckin' is. to make matters even better, you're the only one at school who knows. lucky you.
WARNINGS - australian slang yet again (sorry guys, i cant help it. its in my blood!), swearing, first person?? idk i thought it'd be cool. sorry if it sucks. lol. mentions of adderall (she has ADHD) and vaping. reader is a rich girl and the leader of the sassy girl apocolypse.
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"are you okay, ma'am?"
"dont call me ma'am, luke."
"okay, what the fuck."
that's how i found out the nerd in my AP chemistry class was spider-boy. i mean, obviously i had caught on to his whole 'superhero thing' like, a week after the news articles started flooding in. it was so obvious.
luke is probably one of the only guys in the world dumb enough to put on a latex suit in order to help old ladies cross the street. sure, he's a good samaritan- and sure, he's saving small businesses from being mugged into bankruptcy and shit; but who cares?
every night, i see him swinging from building to building like a fucking weirdo. it gets old after the first 100 foot drop down from the hilton hotels building. like, we get it. you're spider-man. good for you.
sadly, my cynicism was brought to a halt as soon as he saved me from being brutally robbed on my way home. of course i got mugged on the one day i decided not to wear my doc martens. just my luck.
i used to cut through this sketchy alleyway to get to my bus stop because it took way too long walking around the block- that was my first mistake. DO NOT GO INTO SKETCHY ALLEYWAYS IN NEW YORK. NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS IN AN ALLEYWAY.
my second mistake was deciding against popping my second addy during 5th period, because if i had, then maybe i'd be alert enough to clock what was happening before this druggie had his glock pointed at my head. well, at least it wasn't his dick. praise the lord!
the druggie snuck behind me, before literally grabbing me by the neck and pushing me up against the wall of the dingy alleyway. then, he pulled out a WHOLE ASS GUN from his pocket and held it to my head, using the sleeve of his sweater to cover its form.
my breath hitched as the water bottle inside my backpack pressed against my spine. that was my third mistake. frank green water bottles hurt when they're pushing into your bones.
"you're gonna give me all the money you've got on you, kay?" he asked in a low, raspy voice. he definitely smoked 5 packs a day.
nevertheless, i nodded and reached into the side pocket of my backpack. i pulled out my cute little mimco purse and started taking out all the cash in it. it hurt my soul to get rid of it- that money was supposed to go towards my new vape. bummer.
my hands were shaking as they held the messy assortment of bills, waiting for him to take it from me and just leave me alone.
"good. thanks- dont be tellin' anyone about this, or else i'll find you,' he threatened, slowly pulling the gun away from my head.
"i wont, i swear!"
"you're taller than him, ma'am. why dont you just kick him to the curb?"
i furrowed my brows, my eyes scanning the alleyway for the origins of the voice. the origins of luke's voice.
his nasally tone was so distinct, i could recognise it with my head underwater.
"the fuck?" called out the short, ugly smoker with my money. he whipped his head around furiously, suddenly a lot more alarmed than when he was robbing me. suddenly, the nerdy loser in latex swung down and pushed him onto the cold ground.
spider-boy grabbed his wrists and held them behind his back, before webbing them together in some homemade handcuffs.
"are you fuckin' kidding me?" the guy grumbled, his voice muffled by the gravel pushing against his mouth as spider-dork held his head to the ground.
"nope, not kidding you," he sighed, using his webs to secure the man into his position on the ground. he dug into the mans pockets and pulled out my money.
yep, that was luke castellan all right.
spider-nerd leapt off the constrained druggie and walked over to me, handing me back my assortment of bills. "are you okay, ma'am?" he asked, looking downwards a bit to meet my gaze.
thats exactly how luke looks at me. he's gotta be luke- he HAS to be.
i had been watching luke for weeks. i had been analysing his every movement, every strange look and awkward gesture. i was 99.9% sure that spider-man was luke castellan.
but there was only one way to find out.
"dont call me ma'am, luke."
luke choked on air, taking a step forwards as he clumsily held onto the wall in shock. "okay, what the fuck?"
i laughed dryly, my eyes narrowed as i stared at him. the whole ‘spider-man’ thing really did suit him.
"you know?" he stuttered out. i nodded, before pointing over at the guy still squirming under his webs. "maybe you should get rid of him," i said calmly, crossing my arms over my chest after stuffing my money into the pocket of my jeans.
"oh. yeah, right."
before i knew it, luke had quite literally kicked the guy in the head to knock him out.
"are you allowed to do that?" i asked, my eyes wide in shock.
"nah, not really," luke shrugged, before looking down at his watch and pressing a few buttons.
"i thought you were supposed to be a friendly neighbourhood spider-boy," i retorted. luke scoffed, looking back up at me with what i could only assume to be a sly grin from under his mask. "its spider-man,” he corrected.
“and criminals who mess with pretty girls deserve to be curb stomped."
okay. yeah. he had a fair point. i am rather pretty.
then, out of nowhere, luke grabbed me by the waist and aimed his wrist towards the sky. before i knew it, he was swinging us towards the sky like a fucking lunatic.
“luke! what the fuck?!” i screamed, wrapping my arms around his neck and clinging to his body for dear life.
“what’s your addy?” he asked, his toned arm keeping me in place as it pressed against the small of my back.
‘what’s your addy?’ seriously? what a fuckin’ loser. i would’ve made fun of him for using snapchat lingo if it weren’t for how strong his arms were. jesus christ, they were so big and toned… no wonder he skips gym class every lesson; he doesn’t want to show off. what a humble king.
“uhh- greenhead avenue!” i cried out, digging my head into the nook of his neck. gods, he smelt good.
luke nodded, holding me tighter as he swung us through the air. “rodger that.”
“thanks for like… saving me, or whatever,”
i stood inside my bedroom, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear as i clung onto the window frame. luke took off his mask as he stood on the balcony, leaning against the railing. he shot me a meek smile, tilting his head to the side as a way to play down his cocky demeanour.
he’s never gonna let me live this down.
“don’t worry about it.”
he paused, letting his smile drop. “just- promise you won’t tell anyone?” luke asked, his voice low as he leaned forward.
of course i wasn’t going to tell anyone- i’m not a total cunt. i have morals… sometimes.
“i promise, luke.”
he smiled, pulling his mask back over his head before taking a step back. “great. see you on monday,” he called out, jumping off the railing and swinging away from my apartment building.
as soon as he left, i face planted against my bed.
luke castellan was spider-man. i fucking knew it.
that was fine. i knew that.
but what really got me was how hot it was when he held me by the waist, how good he smelt, how raspy his voice was- WHAT THE FUCK.
no. what the fuck. are you kidding me. god no. no no no no no no no. i’m going to jump off the balcony. this is it.
of course. just my luck.
that day i confirmed my suspicions of luke being spider-man.
i also realised why i cared about it much.
fuck my life.
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the-s1lly-corner · 6 months
Note
Maybe a TADC X reader who loves either drawing or crocheting?
If you can’t it’s totally okay and I hope you have a good day/night <3
TADC cast x reader who drawing/crocheting!
Flip flopping between art and crochet for each character!
Writing these while I have some brief downtime! Sobs my feet hurt sm
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CAINE:
Loves hovering over your shoulder in the air while you're working on art! Not in the annoying way that people do when they hover and watch your every move, literally watching you draw and having the nerve to ask if they can take your sketch and finish it (totally not ranting about personal experience)
Well
It can be a little irritating, but caine just loves how fluid you look when you get in your zone
Keeps every drawing youve given him within arms length. Probably keeps it in his hat. Comically has loads of storage in his hat
POMNI:
Crochet! You try to get pomni into it but she fails so so bad and has a tangled mess of material. Oooo please domt take her hands in yours and guide them on what to do that totally wont make the poor jesters soul part with her body I prooooomise
Gets so excited when she manages to make a simple thing, like a bee plush? Idk I love crochet bees, sm
RAGATHA:
I already headcannon ragatha to knit, sew, and crochet! So perhaps you two sit down and do dates where you guys make something for one another? Or perhaps, for a twist to keep everyones pieces unique, imagine you're new to crocheting and ragatha is helping you make stuff! I think thats a cute idea, me thinks
JAX:
Very bad at both but similar to caine likes watching you do either of the two. Now is he interested to learn either? No I dont think so, but he wouldnt make fun of you for your hobbies and he would join you if you offered or asked him to join you
Very bad at both.. probably gets a little salty that this is something hes not skilled in for once/hj
KINGER:
Make him crochet bugs please please please hes gonna keep them all on his bed/inside his pillow fort!! He always holds one in his hands while hes walking around
Very nice very silly I love him sm
Gives them all names and never forgets the names
ZOOBLE:
You guys sometimes draw together, but zooble is more so a.. musical artist, imo. Idk they give me musician vibes that I cant quite explain... loves keeping any art of you make of them in their room, probably tapes them all over the walls in a unneat fashion
GANGLE:
You and her draw a lot together! In fact that's what brought you two together! It's nice to have someone around who cares about you and shares your passion, I think... very nice.. honestly it's very refreshing for gangle to finally have someone! You guys gifts each other paintings and lil crafts and I think that's cute. Art dates
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byhuenii · 6 months
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⊱☆⊰ COFFEE STAINED SHIRT
prompt— couples truth or drink with bf gojo satoru. (WC: idk) pairing— gojo satoru x fem!reader warnings— MINORS DNI! not proofread, fluff, maybe ooc gojo, typos, suggestive, maybe more im missing. a/n— these videos get me through boring days lol, i love these and yeah MINORS DNI. gojo’s questions are in blue and yours are in purple
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“ are we already recording orr… ” satoru’s blue eyes squint at the camera crew who put up their thumbs as a yes now start the video.
YN : “ hi. my name is yn ln! ”
GOJO : “ and im satoru gojo, and this is truth or drink couples edition! ”
“ how long have you two been together and how did you meet up? ”
a sly smirk rolled onto satoru’s lips causing you to groan outloud. “ well if you insist~ she actually spilled coffee on my white shirt that i gifted myself for my own birthday! and 2 1/2 years ”
“ it didnt even look expensive ”, she mumbled under her breath, a few staff giggled
GOJO : “ what? ”
YN : “ nothing anyways.ill go first! ”
a small chuckle escaped her lips, “ oh wow starting off stong. okay what is your favorite part of my body ” her eyes deadpanned to the camera “ i already know what he is gonna say, and its gonna be my ass and boobs .”
GOJO : “ wrong its your heart, i love the way it beats and brings me comfort ”
the silence was evident, gojo tried not to laugh causing little hee hee tee hee slip out. you stared at the camera blank expression.
GOJO : “ it is your boobs and ass though. ” a wide smile plastered on his face
“ have you liked any of my friends? ” satoru happily placed the card down staring beams against you, you hesitated at bit your hand rested against the cup, “ see! she only had eyes on me—“
you took a shot eyes squinting at the bitter and hot aftertaste lingering on your tongue
GOJO : “ WHAT ?? ” “ WHO?? WHAT ??? ”
YN : “ nope i took a shot im not saying shit! ”
GOJO : “ …do any of them know..? ”
YN : “ well i wanna say both of them. ”
GOJO : “ BOTH? AS IN TWO?? ”
you cleared your throat “ anyways, what were your first impressions of me ”
GOJO : “ i thought you were really cute especially when you apologized after spilling the coffee on my shirt.. ”
YN : “ is that it? ” you smiled at how sweet he thought of you
GOJO : “ …and that i wanted to fuc— “
YN : “ OKAY OKAY FUCK. NEVERMIND I ASKED. JUST GO. ” your face turned red flipping off satoru who blew you a kiss
“ what is the one thing you wouldnt change about me? ” satoru rested his head in his hand kicking his feet from under the chair
YN : “ your beautiful big blue eyes. ”
GOJO : “ i was expecting you to say like my big dick or something but awww ”
you kicked his foot under the table “ yeah i guess i love that too. ”
GOJO : “ no no you do love it, you tell me all the time ”
“ okay shut up satoru. how many people did you have sex with while we were talking? ”
GOJO : “ zero, after you spilled that coffee on my shirt i only wanted you. ”
“ whats the meanest thing you said about me to your friends? ” gojo smiled, “ it cant be that bad ”
you sighed taking a shot, debating if you should pour yourself another shot.
GOJO : “ okay im hurt ” he exclaimed dramatically,
YN : “ you may of not had sex with other girls when we were talking but you flirted with them toru. ”
GOJO : “ ..hey i said i was sorry! ” his pout was evident
“ if you could change one thing about me what would it be? ”
GOJO : “ nothing. ”
YN : “ all quick.. ”
“ me or peeta mellark? ”
YN : “ both? ”
GOJO : “ no pick thats not fair! “
YN : “ okay well you obviously! i love my boyfriend more than some fictional man.. ” you looked over at the camera ans whispered peeta mellark,
GOJO : “ HEY I SAW THAT NO NO— “
“ have you ever faked an orgasm? ”
YN : “ no. ”
GOJO : “ im just that good ladies never settle for anything lower! ” he winked at the camera
“ have you ever thought of breaking up with me or taking a break? ”
GOJO : “ honestly once i did, but that was just because my job is so demanding i didnt want you to constantly be alone waiting for me ”
“ would you of dated me STILL if i had a child with another women? ”
YN : “ oh hell yeah i would, kid no kid it dont matter to me ”
“ what is my biggest flaw? ”
YN : “ you are very cocky and some times act like nobody can touch you or you think youre alone basically. ”
GOJO : “ well..damn ”
YN : “ its okay i still love you ”
“ have you every considered having an open relationship? ”
GOJO : “ i have thought about it BUT i don’t like the idea of open relationships. whats the point of being im a relationship if you are going to date another person? it doesn’t make me feel right either.. ”
YN : “ okay good cause i would’ve killed you if you said yes. ”
“ whats the nicest thing you’ve said about me to your friends? ”
GOJO : ww had meanest so obviously we need the nicest now spill.
YN : okay well, this was when we were in our talking stage. i already knew he liked me but i was trying to figure out my feelings and he waited for me and was so supportive. i think i cried and ranted to my friends about him the next day—
GOJO : i mean nobody should pressure nobody into a relationship
YN : see ladies NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS KEEP THOSE EXPECTATIONS HIGH.
GOJO : in the wise words of taylor swift “in a world of boys hes a gentleman!”,
YN : since when did you know tswift…
GOJO : …
“ if i was a leech would you still love me? ”
GOJO : “ aww yes, id put a cute little bow on you! ”
YN : “ really? id love a glitter bow— “
GOJO : “ i would keep you on my arm ans let you suck the shit out of me— “
YN : “ okay bye this video is over. MAKE SURE LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE— ”
GOJO : “ WHAT ALREADY? I WAS JOKING WAIT PLEASE, ”
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A/N: :3 gojo :3
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