Tumgik
#or maybe just never decide idk they can be in canon limbo forever
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oughh......
#laya plays dragon age#da2#oc: liam hawke#this happened a bit ago already & i wanted to draw sth for it but idk if i will finish that#but i gotta yell abt them anyway because OGH.#i have a lot of emotions about this quest ok#bartrand was the perfect scapegoat he was perfect to direct all the rage and pain at all these years#years of imagining gleeful revenge while bartrand is gloating and laughing like an evil soulless bastard#and then you meet him and he is just. a pathetic husk of a man with barely any own will left#and whats worse. varric is so so torn up about it#varric. the guy who never makes anything about him and who will always handwave and joke when something hits too close to home#drops all efforts to be smart and is just. desperate. begs hawke to not kill his brother#and liam wants to want bartrand dead so bad. he wishes he could look him in the eye and enjoy taking his life#and he knows varric will listen to him if he insisted. he knows when it comes down it it varric will yield to his decision#but he sees this broken guy who is barely the villain he kept projecting onto him and he sees varric and he sees two doomed siblings#and knows what its like to lose your sibling to your own blade#and he cant do it#and he hates it so much. but he wont do it.#and its the reason why i cant decide who dealt the killing blow for bethany bc it makes this scene juicy in different ways#if varric kills bethy its equally wanting to spare each other their siblings blood on their hands#as it is taking some form of revenge (on liams part). we both killed each others siblings. now we are even#the revenge part would still be there if liam did the blow on bethany himself. you made me do that and now i will take bartrand for it#but its also much more i know what its like. i wont make go through that too#if varric killed bethy and then also bartrand it would be more#''its my fault she is dead. i will take the revenge she/you deserves if you tell me to even though it will hurt me#dunno. all good variations i will. have to rotate them in my head more#or maybe just never decide idk they can be in canon limbo forever#anyways thats it for shouting into the void about them for now it Will happen again
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mimik-u · 3 years
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Fragments III, 1-100
300 drabbles about Steven Universe/Future, 100 words each! These are the first 100 prompts and writer’s choices that have been fulfilled.
Asterisks are placed next to my personal favorites that I’ve written.
Baggage* — Steven meets his new therapist!
Eternity —How about a Bellow interaction you've always wanted to see in canon but didn't get to?
Foe —Jasper is simultaneously satisfied and yet left deeply empty inside by her self-isolation on Earth, and doesn't understand how to even begin to process this dichotomy. (So she doesn’t.)
Letter — Young Greg's POV when he wrote those letters to his parents Steven found on Mr. Universe episode.
Sword —Connie interacting with someone she doesn't usually talk to by herself (ex Jasper, Bismuth, Lapis, etc.).
Reconciliation — Idk about you but I wanna see more Mega Pearl. The others have not met Mega Pearl.
Marks —How about... Spinel, and the tiny, everyday baby steps towards healing?
Tangled — Peridot finds out/is told about PD/RQ? (And is confirmed in her guess that Pearl is fancy...?)
Challenge* — How is Steven’s TubeTube channel doing?
Bruises — Priyanka tends to Connie's wounds after training sessions with Pearl. [Writer’s Choice]
Rest* — Yellow Diamond gets to relax. (She's the one who most expresses regret and real understanding. Let her take a nap! She deserves it!)
Barbecue* — Post-movie, during cleanup, Steven and Lars talk and plan the BBQ we got a glimpse at during the final song.
Ghost — Yellowtail and Greg talk about fatherhood and how it can be ruined (mentioning Marty and Greg's father subtly).
UNO* — Date between Pearls (platonic or otherwise).
Height — The pebbles!!! They're so small???? Where are they? *Sobs, points at the Heaven and Earth Beetles.*
Embrace — Steven gets a well-deserved cuddle pile from family and friends.
Constructs — Bismuth and Peridot have a lot more in common than they think.
Horns — Amethyst makes an unexpected new friend at Little Homeschool. (Whichever other character you feel would fit best!)
Garden — Pre-show scene. While having a funny chat, Greg mentions something that reminds Rose about her abandoning Spinel, which makes her regret more of her choices.
Advice — Garnet can tell when Stevonnie has a lot on their mind. [Writer’s Choice.]
Hum — Yellow and her relationship with music.
Love* — Pearl considering her romantic feelings towards someone and thinking about how she's finally moving on from Rose. (Doesn't mean she'll ever forget her.)
Kid — A glimpse into “Sadie Killer.” Maybe when they played their first show, while Steven was still in the band. Celebrating afterward or a discussion on why Steven didn't stay IN the band?
Troubleshooting* — Integration of gem communication networks and Earth Internet and phone lines and the resulting inevitable disaster.
Fairytale — Connie gets a tour of Little Homeworld.
Hope — Jasper finally starting to let her guard down and realize her self worth.
Song* — As for prompts... Steg? Like, him in general, just being himself. It's a bummer we only got to see him in the movie.
Mistakes* — Steven talking to someone (not a therapist, just another character) about his trauma?
Forgiveness — The Topaz fusion reconnects with the Crystal Gems at Little Homeschool and apologizes for her role in the kidnapping all those years ago.
Visions — Sapphire and Ruby reflect on the events of "Together Forever." [Writer’s Choice]
Reunited — Maybe a scene where Yellow comes home from a long escapade and is reunited with a worried Spinel?
Beginnings — After CYM, Lapis and Peridot discuss where to live since the barn is destroyed.
Pet* — White Diamond happily announces one day that she has decided to take in a small creature (of your choosing) as a pet.
Together — What were Doc, Army, Navy, and Leggy doing during Future?
Desert — Steven meeting Lion from Lion's perspective. I dunno, I think it could be neat.
Freedom — For a post-CYM/SU:F prompt, what do you think about the exact moment it hit either Blue or Yellow Pearl that they were completely free to follow their whims?
Apologies — Greg apologizes to Steven due to the incident in “Mr. Universe” and both have the talk they should've had in that episode.
Change — Blue and Yellow Zircon's relationship has improved even if they are now rivals in the new democratic Homeworld. This last tiny bit is related to the “Homeworld Bound” episode.
Hug — Bellow cuddling. Yellow has no idea what to do, but Blue is loving it.
Valentine* — Steven gives Peridot a Valentine's Day gift. [Writer’s Choice]
Spite — Aquamarine and Eyeball are distraught at knowing they won't be rewarded for their actions because their worst enemy, Steven Universe, has been labeled a hero and royalty by the Diamonds.
Reevaluation — How about more Peedee and Steven friendship? Like, Peedee noticing Steven’s change in demeanor the farther along the show we get?
Camp — Connie kicking ass at space camp.
Family — The night after the events of the movie, Steven gets some quality family time.
Homestretch — Peridot, Lapis, and Bismuth spend time together while preparing Little Homeworld.
Enough — We know what Jenny, Sour Cream, and Buck are gonna do for their futures, but what's Kiki been up to? Is she gonna take over the pizzeria?
Spillage — Vidalia and Amethyst catch up after Steven's monster episode.
Reformation — White Diamond has learned how to be so extremely empathetic to the point that she literally becomes another person, but has she really begun to understand others?
Comment* — Sardonyx makes some Internet videos.
Unicorn — While traveling through California, Steven encounters two fishermen arguing about unicorns. [SU/GF crossover.] [Writer’s Choice]
Worry — Andy and Greg stay in touch.
Homerun* — I hopal for Opal—perhaps she will attempt some baseball.
Skydancer — Post-CYM, Pearl getting to “truly” take Steven out for a joy ride through the cosmos in a properly operational ship of her design.
Mercy* — The shattering-is-wrong discussion between Rose and Bismuth that led to Bis being bubbled.
Happy — Smoky Quartz hasn't made a self deprecating joke in a while—is it Steven's therapy?
Electric* — Yellow’s gloves—I feel like they’re covering something up, maybe.
Cake — Fusion Cuisine 2: Electric Boogaloo.
Belonging — The Rose Quartz sisters visit again.
Transcendence — Fluorite offers someone wise caterpillar grandma advice.
March — Connie and Steven reflect on changes in life after the pandemic. Not canon compliant. [Writer’s Choice.]
Understanding — Onion be doing Onion things.
Ocean* — Andy and Steven post-”I Am My Monster”? I love their relationship, lol.
Ignorance* — Does Lapis even realize Bismuth was probably the one who poofed her?
Reflection — Did I already say more Mega Pearl? ‘Cause there can never be enough Mega Pearl.
Possibility* — Yellow deciding she should try putting shattered gems back together. (She probably broke the most.)
Storyboard — Peridot’s budding career as a storyboarder.
Fall — Lapis and Steven talk about trauma and recovery. Pre-The Future.
Limbo — How the dismantled gempire has affected the lives of noble gems like Emerald, Holly Blue Agate, and others.
Now — Garnet reminds herself to live in the present.
Grief* — Alexandrite forms for the first time. [Writer’s Choice]
Inauguration — Wait, did Connie's parents ever meet Stevonnie?
Please — Did Kevin ever learn anything? Naaaaaah....unless...
Friend — General prompt? A sequel/prequel to this, please [White D’s panther].
Treatment — Greg starting to learn more about gem stuff to be more involved in Steven's life if something ugly happens.
Numbers — Pearl, please do something with all those phone numbers in your head.
Generations — Rose continues to discover the wonders of Earth, even after all this time. (No angst allowed in this one, just pure wonder.)
Survival — The Off-Colors used to have more members in the past.
Acting — How did Rainbow 2.0 even get invited to babysit Onion?
Kindness* — Former Mayor Dewey coming to terms with his new position in town.
Play — The Gems and Greg try to capture Steven's first moments on a bike. [Writer’s Choice]
Documentary — Ronaldo makes a real actually informative documentary about Little Homeworld.
Rain — Blue Diamond still cries sometimes.
Zoophobia — Also, I saw Z and my immediate thought was "Zoophobia.”
Echo* — Why does the tiny floating whale have Rose's voice before Steven ever heard it in the tape?
Sketch — Steven and Connie discover an anime character/mythological figure who bears an awfully similar resemblance to Obsidian.
Unironically — Why does Buck wanna be a doctor?
Club — How did Bismuth, Lapis, and Peri become such tight friends?
Nostalgia — Greg considers a comeback tour.
Pressure* — The creation of the Diamonds, maybe?
Coping — Amethyst and Pearl grapple with Rose's pregnancy. [Writer’s Choice]
Theatre — Sugilite, meet Rainbow 2.0.
Dadhood* — Whatever happened to Mrs. Fryman? IS there a Mrs. Fryman, or was it only a passing on-and-off thing that resulted in kids?
Lingering — Jasper finally lets Malachite go.
Human — Steven talks to his therapist about his mom, the feelings of before and the now. (It was left open-ended—his relationship with his mother.)
Words — Kofi is proud of his daughters.
Quest — [Letter prompt] Quest.
Picture — Sour Cream and Steven talking about absent parents and bad parenting. Post-The Future.
Bittersweet* — Shep finally gets to meet the notorious Lars.
Gemini — Spinel discovers memes and we're all doomed.
Weird — When he's younger, Steven doesn't quite know how to label the Gems.
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peachymess · 3 years
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I miss you. Tumblr nuked my account several months ago. Almost a year, I think. I started a new one and nobody cares. In a this time I've only got one single follower and idk why. An old mutual, but she obviously only followed me out of pity. She's much closer with her circle of friends, none of which care to interact with me. And I don't want to just force myself onto them. And I have to stay in anon with you because I don't want to come across begging, but I'm just so fucking alone
Hi, anon! 
I’m sorry to hear you feel so left out and alone. And I’m sorry tumblr nuked your account.  Obviously, I don’t know the context outside of what you’re telling me, so I might pose questions or say things that are irrelevant do this particular situation, but I wanna suggest this: perhaps people didn’t “not care”, but rather didn’t realize you got nuked? Even if you made a post about being nuked, on your new account, how would your old followers see that, you know? Imagine if I stopped posting and a week later I made a new account to say I got locked out, who would see it? Nobody follows that account so it wouldn’t show up on their dash. Sure, I could tag it peachymess, but who would search up my name, you know? Nobody would know that there was any information to look for to begin with. Because the sad truth is people leave. Throughout the years, I’ve seen so many people come and go. I miss so many people. But fandom is often just a train stop. People arrive, then another interest or life event pulls them out of the station and away they go. Even people you think are cemented stuck to the foundation of a fandom can up and leave - HAVE up and left. I think I’m not the only one who’s learned that radio silence means another person’s leave to accept. 
I don’t know what “nuked” means in the context of accounts, so I don’t know if you’re locked out or if it’s messed up in such a way that you decided to start fresh despite still having access to the old one. If you can’t get into the old one, the above explanation can be part of why people didn’t see your new post/didn’t go looking. But if you announced the move on your old account, then here’s something to consider: the fandom isn’t what it used to be. Especially if you’re from the eremin family. Obviously, there’s little likelyhood that the ship will be canon now - there seems to be no time for romance at all, tbh, with so few chapters left and so much WAR to deal with - and I think that deterred some of the activity. The SNK story has also become so bleak that many have taken a step back for the time being. The tumblr exodus took away a chunk too. Over all, in my experience, people aren’t as active anymore. And if they’re like me, who follow a good amount of people, it’s nearly impossible to catch every post by every blog - even though you follow them. Maybe they, like me, rarely scroll that much anymore, too. So, don’t be afraid to re-promote/boost the post you made so more people see it.
As for the pity follow. I don’t know. You know the situation better, but “out of pity” is probably an assumption, not a fact, unless it was explicitly confirmed to be. Remember that. Don’t always take your assumptions as facts - especially not if they’re made in a bad headspace. Depending on how much you interracted pre-nuking, it might be what feels natural to them, to follow but otherwise stay silente. Using myself as reference again, I follow a lot mutuals whom I never talk to, yet I care for them, just for being part of the family/community. If me and you were mutuasl but never talked - and I saw your post about being nuked - I’d quietly follow too, and not out of pity. 
I don’t know about this person’s circle of friends, I don’t know if they also used to be mutuals with you or what. I don’t know what that situation is about. I’m sorry it feels so excluding, either way. Whether they leave you out on purpose or you just don’t fit into the circle, though: perhaps either reason is the hint you need to go on to make a new circle of your own. I understand change is scary, and often unwanted. When you feel snug in a place/state, you want it to remain static forever, but... change is an inevitable part of life. Luckily, we have a big opportunity to grow from change. I was forced to give up on my own snugness and now I’ve started a new chapter in my life that’s made me happier, despite being downright terrified of letting go. Perhaps this will be hard for you too, but the reality seems to be that you can’t stay in this phase, whatever it is, because it’s hurting you. It isn’t what it used to be, and the only way to be ok again, is to find a new snug place because the old one isn’t there anymore. It changed. I’m not sure where I’m going with this. I’m genuinely sad that you sound to be in such a painful state right now, and I want you to find a spot to fit snuggly into again. That doesn’t have to mean in a different fandom, though. Perhaps the resolution will be to ask you friend if there’s room for you in her circle - perhaps it turns out they weren’t aware you’re feeling so outside of things. And maybe the spot is with another circle in the same fandom. But one thing’s for certain, a move has to be made, because you shouldn’t stay put in this limbo of feeling unwanted yet wanting to be wanted by that very same, painful enviornment. 
You say you miss me, so we obviously have some sort of connection. Feel free to DM me. I’m not active all that much outside of check-ins, and sometimes I take a long while to reply to things. But that’s just me, it’s got nothing to do with you, and you’re welcome to stay and chat.  Stay strong, Anon. And good luck, whatever you decide to do! 
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hanschenrilow · 5 years
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spring awakening timeline!! this is mostly for my own reference for. fics? daydreaming? idk but i felt like posting it. it’s based on context clues from the play mostly (for both timelines with some adjustments) and cross-referencing wendla’s birth and death dates from her gravestone. so that being said, it’s not official or canon or anything like that, but it makes sense to me. under the cut since i included both the play timeline and the musical timeline and it got long!
spring awakening (play) timeline
act 1, scene 1 — may 5th, 1892
it’s wendla’s birthday, and she’s 14. she was born in 1878. her and her mother discuss her skirt length.
act 1, scene 2 — mid-late may, 1892
the boys are talking about schoolwork, so they’re likely still in school. melchior and moritz discuss manhood’s emotion.
act 1, scene 3 — late may-early june, 1892
the girls are talking about going to the river and all the plants that are growing there; it’s likely late spring. melchior walks by and the girls are blinded by his beauty or whatever.
act 1, scene 4 — early june-mid june, 1892
moritz is breaking into the board room to see if he passed, so it’s the end of the school year. hans asks if ernst passed too :) he did, but only moritz OR ernst can pass the first quarter the following school year. (hint: moritz does not)
act 1, scene 5 — early june-mid june, 1892
wendla is looking for waldmeister (sweet woodruff), which blooms in early may and grows throughout the summer. maywine is drank throughout the spring. melchior beats wendla after she asks him to then around 3 months pass before they speak again.
act 2, scene 1 — mid-september, 1892
the boys have started school again and have already taken some tests (moritz and ernst have both failed some things already, as explained by moritz).
max von trenk also apparently died this month.
act 2, scene 2 — mid-september, 1892
wendla’s sister has had her baby. not really any evidence for when this takes place aside from it being after scene 1 and not cold enough for wendla or her mother to wear a coat. (wendla also asks how babies are made in this scene.)
act 2, scene 3 — ?? mid-september, 1892
hans is just jacking off. there’s no way to tell when this is.
act 2, scene 4 — late september, 1892
the hay is fresh and it’s raining outside. the hayloft scene.
act 2, scene 5 — late september-early october, 1892
frau gabor is answering moritz’s letter about how he failed the first quarter and can’t continue through the rest of the school year.
act 2, scene 6 — late september-early october, 1892
not much to determine when this is other than it’s sometime soon after act 2/scene 4 and wendla is in despair.
act 2, scene 7 — late september-early october, 1892
moritz has failed the first quarter and is just finishing reading frau gabor’s letter. he kills himself after talking with ilse.
act 3, scene 1 — early october, 1892
melchior is expelled following moritz’s suicide, which is blamed on his essay.
act 3, scene 2 — mid-october, 1892
moritz’s funeral. it’s pouring rain. the boys discuss schoolwork near his grave for the upcoming quarter.
act 3, scene 3 — mid-october, 1892
the gabors discuss what they’re going to do about melchior, and herr gabor reveals that frau bergmann gave him a letter that melchior wrote wendla apologizing for what he did to her in the hayloft.
act 3, scene 4 — mid-late october, 1892
melchior is at the reformatory/house of correction. he’s there for around 2 weeks before he runs away.
act 3, scene 5 — october 27th-28th, 1892
wendla dies from the abortionist after discovering she is pregnant.
act 3, scene 6 — late october, 1892
hans and ernst are rolling about in the grass at the end of the grape harvest season.
act 3, scene 7 — early november, 1892
melchior arrives at the graveyard after running away from the house of correction, which likely took several days. the scene describes it as being a ‘clear november night’. wendla’s grave is fresh and she died around a week before. moritz has been dead for around a month.
spring awakening (musical) timeline
act 1, scene 1 (mama who bore me, mama who bore me [reprise]) — mid-may, 1891
wendla and her mother discuss her short dress and how babies are made. wendla’s birthday is never mentioned, but in comparison with the other scenes it’s still fair to assume that it’s mid-may.
for some reason, the libretto states that the year is 1891.
act 1, scene 2 (all that’s known, the bitch of living) — late may, 1891
the boys are doing their recitations for the end of the school year. melchior promises to write moritz the essay about sex.
act 1, scene 3 (my junk) — late may-early june, 1891
the girls are discussing greta’s wedding, and most weddings happened in late spring.
act 1, scene 4 (touch me) — october 16th, 1891
melchior announces the date as he writes in his journal. as in the play, the school year has started and the quarter is coming to an end.
a little confusing here since moritz acts like he just got the essay when melchior promised to write it back in may, but maybe he just took forever to write it. who knows.
act 1, scene 5 (the word of your body) — mid-late october?, 1891
the timeline gets janky here. there’s no way frau bergmann would be making maywine in the middle of october. the play’s timeline makes much more sense, but i’m going to finish this musical timeline anyway.
act 1, scene 6 — late october-mid november, 1891
this scene could span a lot of time, but it’s the end of the second quarter and moritz has just passed the middle terms.
act 1, scene 7 (the dark i know well) — mid-november, 1891
the girls talk about something they did at school, so it can’t quite be the end of their school year yet. 
act 1, scene 8 — november 27th, 1891
again, melchior announces this date as he writes in his journal. this is the beating scene, which means it’s not too long after scene 7.
act 1, scene 9 — late november-early december, 1891
moritz reveals to his father that he failed. it’s confusing here again because moritz is in the background of scene 8 being told that he failed, and yet he had just passed the middle terms; the teachers only discussed failing him on his finals. i guess you can just assume that they decided to tell him he failed his middle terms instead.
act 1, scene 10 (and then there were none) — early-mid december, 1891
moritz is reading frau gabor’s letter. frau gabor says that moritz will not be promoted in the fall, again making the timeline of which exams he failed confusing, but we’re gonna ignore that and assume it was the previous point. 
at this age (14-15) boys would be going on to an entirely new schooling anyway so that fits.
act 1, scene 11 (the mirror-blue night, i believe) — early-mid december, 1891
melchior is lamenting over the beating he gave wendla, which makes sense as it was just a few weeks before. wendla mentions michaelmas which AGAIN ruins the timeline because michaelmas is on september 29th. maybe we can just pretend they were actually rehearsing for a christmas chorale. 
act 2, scene 1 (the guilty ones) — same as act 1/scene 11
this takes place directly after scene 11.
act 2, scene 2 (don’t do sadness/blue wind) — same as act 1/scene 11
in my mind this is taking place at the same time as act 1/scene 11 and act 2/scene 1, since wendla mentions that moritz is missing.
act 2, scene 3 (left behind) — mid-late december, 1891
moritz’s funeral, and he likely killed himself a couple weeks before.
act 2, scene 4 (totally fucked) — late december, 1891
melchior is being expelled for moritz’s suicide, blaming it on melchior’s essay.
act 2, scene 5 (the word of your body [reprise]) — late december?, 1891
doesn’t really make sense that they’d be rolling around in a vineyard at the end of fall/beginning of winter but so be it.
act 2, scene 6 (whispering) — early january, 1892
a few weeks after the hayloft scene, at least. the gabors discuss sending melchior away to the reformatory for the rest of the school year.
act 2, scene 7 — mid-january, 1892
not long after scene 6, melchior is at the reformatory, formulating a plan to escape with wendla. wendla has already written to melchior about her being pregnant. meanwhile, all the way back in their town, wendla is being killed by abortives.
act 2, scene 8 — mid-late january, 1892
the kids read melchior’s letter. wendla has already died and melchior has run away from the reformatory.
act 2, scene 9 (those you’ve known) — mid-late january, 1892
melchior arrives at the cemetery and sees wendla’s fresh grave. he attempts to kill himself then changes his mind after thinking of his friends who have passed, and how he’ll carry their light with him forever. 
act 2, scene 10 (the song of purple summer) — undated
since the song of purple summer is not necessarily a narrative song, this scene exists in limbo. but you can assume it’s at the end of spring again after everything that happened; or at least that’s what they’re looking ahead to.
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