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azure-cherie · 2 months

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20 things I've learned as i turn 20

My birthday is in a few days though i like to keep it private I'd like to share some of my thoughts 😁 the things I've learned are mostly based off my experiences

Individuality: one can be a loner in life but that doesn't guarantee a thing about individuality, to learn it one has to be in uncomfortable places and do uncomfortable things only to realise oh that is my thing and i must pursue , though we keep acquiring things from here and there all our lives but it's our zest that makes it ours .

Don't be afraid to move alone, stay alone or do things alone , I'm still working on it and the most important part is people are so busy they don't even care what you are doing, only a pathetic person jokes about you being lonely and doing things on your own

You are watching self help but are you applying it ?? With so much information available one can often get lost in comparison and be confused about thing , to try things is a better way to decide whether we should listen to someone , most of the times people don't even know what they're saying always ask yourself before following someone's advice .

Only give someone something when you are genuinely having an excess in your life , give from what you have extra , or else you'll end up feeling empty and sad because you gave them from your part, for example : there's a friends birthday and you don't have excess to give them a gift just skip the party or give them something hand made like cards , gifts or bake cookies , if they really love you they will appreciate you and only such people are worth having around , same with your time , only make time for others when you have done everything for yourself.

Don't fall into the trap , boundaries are tangible, don't be like " oh I had such a good day my best friend is crying but my boundary is to not care i live my good life" shut up this girl right here was there for you when you needed someone we often lose our way then the people around us need to bring us to the right path , you need people around you remember. Please do this only if the other person does the same for you .

It's okay to not like anyone around you : Darwin said survival of the fittest and we mostly stay in competition with people , so it's okay to not like everyone don't ghost them because you find one thing annoying, they have good things you can look out for , focus on the good .

Give yourself and others the space : don't seem needy or desperate because you had a fight with someone or just a problem with yourself, perspectives come with time , you and they need it if it's meant to be things will be alright

It's okay to lose things , we get tired of things and people and situations and it's fine if it's worth you can fight for it but if you are staying only because of attachment it doesn't take long till it wears off , get ready for the new chapter of your life

It's okay to win , personally I realised I have been afraid of winning and that's why I don't. when you are young you can be programmed to feel like a loser but know that life keeps changing you can win if you believe it .

You don't need to fix everything about you : ahh please please don't give up on good things just because you thing you are yet to heal , no you're good go for it if you feel like it , moreover something's are just not worth it to fix or heal , simple changes can accomodate.

People who love you will accommodate for you and it goes both ways , you have to belive in the power of you and everyone around you and sometimes bend when you need to

What is not worth bending is your values , when you know something is right do what is right regardless , be the right person to yourself by doing what is right to you .

Don't worry about being a good or bad person , it doesn't matter in the long run , a narcissist thinks they're the best and an anxious person thinks they're the worst but we know what's the truth , sometimes in life you have to do bad things but that doesn't make you a bad person , you need to survive in this world things aren't cheap we suffer from capitalism and mind games , do what you need to get a good life for you and your closed ones , we'll talk about the bad deeds in hell and even god will see what you have done and why you have done it , intentions matter .

Keep a balance of experiences and consequences, don't lose out of an experience because you worried about the consequences too much and don't do something that you will regret because you didn't think about the consequences of your actions.

Never tell one person everything, don't vent to everyone , the more you vent the more possibility you have of your personal information getting leaked as a gossip, if you tell different people about different issues you can know when they betray you and dismiss the rumour and cut them off and know that some people are just better at advice in different sectors like you wouldn't ask a logical person who's invested in financial topics about your emotional turmoil it will only disappoint.

Keep your spiritual practices private , don't do something because everyone is , people like to mock , put bad energy or evil eye on perfectly fine things , it's only protection to keep your practices private or anonymous on the internet . Do some spiritual practice because you feel connected to it not because everyone is , don't follow the crowd look within yourself. This applies to deity work , magic or manifestation.

Learn about money and finances and investment, Acquire skills it's only right when you know enough about these things as they create the foundation of your life here, learn about it young so you don't suffer when older . learn everything that you can don't be afraid to be a first timer one day you'll be a pro at it and you'll thank yourself that you were a first timer , try everything you can .

Don't worry about defining yourself, you're constantly changing and that's the beauty of you , you can know who you are and you have to relearn who you are in every era of life .

Be happy for what your parents have done and forgive for what they didn't, this can be hard but don't let them be another obstacle for you to not reach your highest self it's best to forgive and move on , it's also their First time as a person learning about living.

Love yourself unconditionally, last but not the least the most important, forgive yourself, accept the ways you have changed , do things for yourself, practice all 5 love languages on yourself, give yourself the love .

I have learnt so much more and hope you do too , love you so much 🤍

Thanks for reading<33

#😋 hope you enjoy reading this #lessons learned #manifestation #spirituality #self help

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kenmakodz · 1 month

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CANDID LOVE ˙✧˖📷

13. wait, what? ☆

writing in-between cuts!

after walking into the cinema fashionably and embarrassingly late, you finally meet up with the rest of the group. they don't seem annoyed, since the movie technically doesn't start for another 20 minutes. yuuji steps aside from where he previously stood next to you; glancing over to where yuuta once was, you realize he's been making his way over. maki coaxes the group to move ahead, and yuuta grabs your hand out of the blue. you take the gesture with open arms, yet still confused as to why he's seemed so clingy lately. there's no way it has anything to do with your friends being over, yuuta doesn't seem like the type of guy who gets jealous..

you all take your seats, assigned in a row: megumi, nobara, maki, toge, yuuta, y/n, yuuji, left to right. toge seems to be talking to an uninterested yuuta about something on his phone, while yuuji starts up a conversation with you about what happened with him and megumi last night. hushed whispers between the two of you make their way to yuuta's ears, and he can only feel as though you are keeping secrets from him. he knows it's wrong, he knows he shouldn't, but he eavesdrops.

"wait, so he ended up where?"

"dude, like, practically on top of me."

you laugh, and it's hard for yuuta not to smile at the sound.

"and you still think he doesn't like you back, why?"

... wait, what?

he quickly hushes you, and looks over to the end of the row to make sure the boy in question didn't hear you. yuuta has turned his attention towards the two of you, and yuuji sends him a small wave before glaring back at you. "shut the hell up, he could have heard you!" he hisses, not wanting to be mean, but anxious nevertheless. you smile at how shy he gets whenever his crush is mentioned, and ruffle his hair. "it's fine, yuuji. even if he did hear me, i'm sure he'd be over the moon about it." he rolls his eyes and pulls out his phone as you turn your own attention back towards the various advertisements on the screen.

toge finally looks back at yuuta with the most shit-eating grin he thinks he's ever seen. he's confused, until he realizes he was right about toge knowing something all along. the look in his eyes says it all, and toge bursts into a hushed laughing fit. "you knew?!" yuuta whisper-screams, hitting his friend on the arm who is still curled over laughing. he nods, "i saw them holding hands outside the store."

as the ads fade out and the lights dim, anyone around the group could hear yuuta's anger when he lashes out at toge with a "you dick!"

the movie was long, and not exactly something you'd watch in your own time. nobara seemed to share the same opinion with you, considering when you glanced over to her, she was sound asleep on maki's shoulder. the only people who seemed genuinely interested in what was on the screen were toge and yuuji, who kept giving eachother wide-eyed stares every time something unexpected happened. you lean into yuuta, mumbling about how they're like two peas in a pod, and he hums in agreement.

... the cinematic endeavor ends with yuuta's hand wrapped tightly in yours, and your head on his shoulder. whether out of annoyance or relief, it really wasn't certain. the glares have stopped, and the clinginess seems to have subsided. the realization hits you like a truck as you're walking out of the theater, and hold him back while the rest of the group exits. smiling at him similar to toge, he's already prepared to roll his eyes. "you didn't know he was gay, did you?" he starts walking again, pulling your arm as you giggle behind him. "shut up," he mumbles under his breath.

fun facts -> nobara has secretly seen the movie before, but she didn't want to cause a fuss after everyone already decided on it. hence... the sleeping. she didn't even tell maki, because she seemed excited, but in reality maki would've preferred literally anything else. toge and yuuji also wouldn't shut up after the movie ended and talked about it the whole walk home.

-> hahahahsahahshahshadghahs :) bit of a short update but i figured there wasn't really any room for texts if they were all irl for the majority :p

previous, masterlist, next [14. BANNED </3]

taglist is open! @just-a-girlblogger @moryymor @swissy23 @hanyacoded @sereniteav @k4romis @jayathelostdragon @h3rmess @olivandeee @lysaray @ari3000dontcare @raechu11 @marifujioka @nyxlai @sonicsolos @saltypuffin1040 @r0ckst4rjk @h8ani @lmaolmaolmao @maya-maya-56 @mittensdun @adrenova @pnkblueberry @morgyyyyyyy @chososwh0r3 @lunecqm @r4veeen @arivsx @levlucs-kiru @mellozhi @sad-darksoul @ichorstainedskin @phoenix-eclipses @h3xi2g0n3 @eternalalmondd @en40p @love-jelly @kaeichi @vianna99 @dreamxiing @satoryaa @0range-juiceee @you-always-made-me-blush @casabaswrld @jjk-men

if you are in bold, i am unable to tag you :( and if i forgot to add you, PLEASE YELL AT ME

⤷ © kenmakodz

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lovelybrooke · 2 months

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IT IS I!! Now that I’ve written about Vox Val and Carmilla I will finally attempt my interpretation of ALASTOR. So just letting you know I was about to send this multiple times within the week but was never satisfied, and so this is an attempt :), I might send in more stuff if I feel this isn’t detailed enough/ incomplete.

Alastor see’s the reader as a fun little puzzle at first, putting them on the stop and trying to figure out what was going on in that little head of theirs, to him this was just entertainment, he really couldn’t care less about the reader, he just saw them as something to keep him entertained if he’s free or bored.

He only really starts to actually like the reader once their a little more comfortable, at least comfortable enough to engage in conversation with Alastor himself or the group, their views on the world, the hotel and whatever is insightful, he finds he actually likes conversing with them even if they don’t agree on most things, the fact that they’re so kind and helpful to everyone, even those who wronged them, intrigues and confuses him, but that isn’t a bad thing, it must just mean that they’re naive and ignorant, he reckons they haven’t actually seen the bad In people. Except he’s wrong, and he learns this during one of their small conversations (with or without the group), the reader spoke about it so casually, their neglect and abuse, it was completely fine to them, they still insist on being kind and helpful to the people who’ve wronged them. Suddenly it isn’t that they’re ignorant, or that they have just been surrounded by good, in a way they’re like him in a way, treated unjustly. (His backstory has yet to be explored but I’m going off of what Vivziepop shared relating to his mother’s death and his weird moral code).

Not to say reader is determined but in Alastor’s mind the reader’s perspective of life is a reflection on their own motivations, and he’s impressed, he might see parts of the reader in charlie but still thinks the reader is distinct in a way Charlie isn’t, they want to help but they aren’t out there, they help in ways that people don’t notice. (I have some examples but I’m shit at explaining so I’ll leave this somewhat up to interpretation) and now that he’s realized this he reflects back to old conversations and realizes how careful they are, not just because they’re anxious but they’re always paying attention, doing little actions that Alastor hadn’t realized is supposed to cater to him.

And now Alastor is really paying attention, is the reader naive? Yes, but they’re so thoughtful in everything they do that he just can’t help but keep watching them, he feels like he’s the only one who’s able to properly guide them, without taking advantage of them. He talks to Rosie about how insightful and clever the reader is, how lovely their company is and so on.

Then he finally notices the Vees watching, as it is he was obsessed but that amplified the second there was competition, suddenly he realizes that someone else could take someone he cares for away from him, and although he always knew there were people out to get him, he didn’t think those same people would want to snatch you.

And me personally I think, every time he feels his relationship with the reader is threatened he’ll become more and more obsessed, more possessive.

ANYWAY IM DONE! I decided to look at some stuff In the canon au master list which helped me a lot :) :), you are free to disagree with anything I wrote thank you for listening!!! (Please pardon any typos)

Omg more stuff I love it.

This was exactly how I viewed Alastor's obsession with reader. Like he views them as a puzzle and wants figure out how/why they're in hell, why they're so nice, what exactly is going on in their head.

And as time goes on this obsession grows and grows, so when he learns that no, reader isn't naive, they've gone through so shit and try their hardest to see the good in people, he's like, genuinely surprised, which is a first for him.

And you're right, Alastor has this idea that he's readers favorite person so when the Vee's and the other overlords start showing interest in reader he becomes way, way more obsessed.

I hope you're writing your own stuff because you're genuinely such an amazing writer, please keep sending stuff in I love it.

#yandere x reader #soft yandere #platonic yandere #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #platonic yandere hazbin hotel #yandere hazbin hotel

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bioethicists · 1 year

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hm i really hope that someone has said this better than me but the betterhelp ads (specifically the video ones, as the podcast ones tend to be less scripted) are such poignant examples of alienation + the role of 'go to therapy' in perpetuating that alienation. keep in mind that, if you personally found a therapist who is genuinely healing for you + that therapist happens to be through betterhelp- i'm genuinely happy for you + that experience does not invalidate anything i have to say below! (but jsyk they're trying to sell your shit to facebook lol)

starting strong w/ the fact that betterhelp is essentially the uber of therapy (aka using an independent contractor model which is harmful + predatory towards its providers), rushing in to fill the market on largely uninsured and/or uninformed ppl who want the ease of a concierge system without the cost + lacks a meaningful supervision system (which led to one gay man being recommended a conversion therapist when he asked for someone to help with his identity struggles, btw!). smarter people than me have written about the ways in which these trendy independent contractor apps strip people of labor rights, fail to provide adequate wages, + in the case of healthcare apps, increase digital surveillance + decrease accountability demanded from providers while exploiting the failure of the US healthcare system in order to churn a profit w/o actually creating sustainable, equitable change.

the betterhelp video ads all circle around a theme- a millennial starts talking about some form of emotional pain or worry, usually relatively standard existential worries ("do you ever think nothing has meaning?") or life worries ("i hate my job" "i think i'm gay"). their friends or the ppl around them respond blankly + coldly, looking at them like they're crazy. while i understand these ads are supposed to be tongue in cheek, they demonstrate the crushing reality of our alienation from one another- the solution to your friends responding to your evident pain with confusion + apathy is to confine that pain to a therapy session! nobody wants to hear your struggles or understands them- come generate profits for us by facetiming a newly graduated 24 year old who can barely make rent!

this theme fits well with what already put me off about betterhelp's marketing- their goal has never been to provide access to therapy for those who want it or to altruistically fill in some healthcare gap. their goal, bolstered by the rise in emotional suffering following, you know, the worldwide pandemic, is to generate + increase demand for therapy as a commodity. their earlier podcast ads focused on convincing others that therapy "isn't just for crazy ppl" + "everyone should be in therapy". regardless of if you personally agree with that statement, it should be evident that this is a blatant marketing tactic in which therapy is a commodity to be peddled, not an offer of support or healing. in fact, they're probably actively shying away from treating "crazy people", bcuz their flimsy support systems could not possibly handle an influx of ppl regularly in crisis or experiencing breaks with a common reality. their target audience is your average millennial under late capitalism + post COVID - anxious, lonely, vaguely depressed, unhappy with their jobs, worried + hopeless about their futures.

i'm not here to tell anyone not to get therapy. that's a personal decision + is none of my fucking business. it's about questioning the total alienation we feel from one another, such that pouring our heart our unexpectedly to a friend + being met with a blank stare is framed as "haha you need therapy" + not "it's crushing that this is how distant we are from one another". it's about a company noticing that (unfortunately very real) distance + fear of vulnerability + using that to direct our emotions into the confines of a business transaction under abusive labor conditions. it's about a world in which we are not engaging with one another emotionally (despite, or i guess bcuz of: widespread suffering, recent mass death, class warfare/untenable working conditions, increased pressure of fascist politics, generational trauma + abuse, etc etc). commodifying therapy isn't going to make that loneliness go away- it's going to normalize it.

#anti psychiatry #smh i write all these on the toilet then my wife is like charlie it's been a fucking hour

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cybertron-after-dark · 1 month

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I was gonna ask a question but i honestly forgot it 😅 so just tell me something you want to rant about

If you do happen to remember what you were gonna ask feel free to do so, do not worry about spamming my inbox bc I live for that shit.

As for the rant

Transformers Rescue Bots had some of the best, kindest, and most respectful representation of neurodivergence I have ever seen in media and I'm tired of pretending it didn't.

While there are obvious complaints to be made about neurodivergent traits (especially autistic traits) usually being portrayed in media by inhuman characters like aliens or robots, this being a case of both, I feel like thats a pretty negligible sin given just how human the show makes the robots feel. (Also it was like 2011 and we were STRUGGLING for any scraps of rep anyway)

But like. The behaviors all these robots exhibit are all shit that I do that was always deemed unacceptable when I was a kid and seeing it portrayed with the level of kindness and gentleness they do in that show has me fuckin crying a little man. I wish I had actually watched it when I was younger and it was first airing because maybe if I did I would've had an easier time explaining what the hell was going on with my brain a LOT sooner.

Blades being anxious, overly sensitive, and WHOLEHEARTEDLY queer (which they had the absolute unparalleled balls to just casually confirm by having him swoon over "hunky vampires" in one episode and NOBODY commented on it. Fucking iconic) and getting so so deeply invested in the shows and movies he loves that he acts out the roles with enough passion to steel his nerves and completely flourish.

Boulder getting really confused at concepts that are basic and intuitive for most people, but still being so fucking intelligent, and never being made to feel stupid for the mix-ups, as well as just being so wholely, unabashedly in love with the planet he's found himself on, even if he doesn't understand all of it (Also apologizing to inanimate objects when he knocks them over 😭)

Chase being obsessed with rules and law because he NEEDS the structure to not fall apart at the seams, even feeling the need to fabricate a minor crime to justify using the emergency line to get a hold of the firehouse when he can't find the other bots. As well as just fully not understanding comedy (BUT TRYING HIS DAMNEDEST), taking things super literally, and having a lot of trouble with tone and expressions (even though you know just how deeply he feels All The Time).

Heatwave being desperate for attention and recognition, but completely allergic to asking for it. And honestly allergic to showing any genuine emotional responses other than aggression. The constant sarcasm and sass and defensiveness that he POORLY maintains because everyone knows that underneath that tough guy front is the loneliest robot on earth that wants to be loved SO bad but would rather jump into unicron's mouth than voice it because if he lets his guard down who knows what will happen to him or the people he cares about.

Just. All of it man. Seeing them exhibiting all these behaviors and quirks that all too often get met with poor reactions from people who don't want to deal with what they don't really get, but here they're met with patience and understanding?? It's got me fucked up. They get to be functional adults that struggle with what they have going on but still push through. They get to have unconditionally loving relationships with people that treat them with respect. And that's the kind of shit that gives me a lot of hope for folks like me because maybe some neurotypical kids that watched it picked up on what's helpful when their friend who acts like one of the bots is going through it. And maybe some neurodivergent kids watched it too and for the first time they just felt SEEN.

Okay rant over, I'm gonna go cry over some plastic robots 👍

#post written while ugly sobbing a little #rescue bots was written with this complete and utter kindness baked into it #as much as i praise the show for the comedy and character aspects #which are still wonderful in their own right #it must not be understated how genuine and sweet and compassionate the writing is #the funny little flash animated robot show did more research than sia ever did with her shitshow hatecrime of a movie #maccadam #transformers #rescue bots

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dazyskiie-luv · 7 months

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Overblot mc/yuu but...????

TW �� mention of vomiting, fighting Crowley and winning (sorry Crowley lovers), past death. I like thinking a lot tbh

not necessarily angst but it is in here! Same with fluff...this was really just me rambling.

* EDIT: WHY DID IT TAKE HOURS UNTIL I FINALLY GOT TOLD I WAS WRITING OVERBLOT WRONG.

I think about MC overbloting a lot and I also think about adding it into my own books because of how??? good??? the idea???? is???????

I genuinely imagine that even from the start MC was in danger of overbloting themself, with the stress and despair of finding out they aren't in THEIR world, away from their (family and/or friends) with possibly NO WAY BACK EVER because of some egocentric crow refusing to do more than he wants to???????

They would obviously be hella upset, stressed, depressed, anxious, etc because they know NOTHING of this world and is practically a BABY among people who lived here THEIR WHOLE LIFE.

So as more overblots happen, the more their OWN overblot is brewing. Bubbling, waiting to enter the game. Especially with the magic always getting slashed onto them. I think the only reason why they HAVEN'T overbloted just yet is because of grim

a more personal headcanon; Grim's fire, when you have a close bond with him, sorta starts erasing your blot and fueling HIS flames, making it more powerful. Essentially, think of when you're close friends with someone... you'll find it easier to fight for them right?? like you have more power to do that??? that's what its like

Now think of when MC is just TOO deep in their mind, TOO deep into their emotions and its the ONE TIME grim isn't there to help. They go to throw up blot and after panicking for a bit they just accept it. They accept that "I'm gonna overblot and probably die" because they're just too tired to worry abt themself

They don't tell anyone and since the overblot is already taking over the entire inside of their body, grims flames can't really???? get it all???? It'll always be there and it'll continue to grow and slowly grim notices that when he's feeling more powerful than ever while MC is showing obvious signs of getting ready to overblot

Grim choosing not to say anything to other people would be like... i guess out of character but at the same time i think In character????? He knows how tired MC is with dealing with everyone and honestly he's tired of it too so YASSS SLAY HENCH-BESTIEEE!!!!!

Sooner or later the others would notice too and it would be a little late to help MC since the overblot is already seeping out of their skin like they're crying. and honestly? their body IS crying. it's crying blot. And even as everyone is screaming and panicking about MC, they're just... sitting there.

Like they're annoyed everyone is making a big deal out of it considering no one cared before, and they're just like "stfu we're in class" and then focus on the teacher going "u can continue im sorry abt that."

And everyone is just??? confused?? because why aren't they going haywire or like.....???? idk..... crying in pain....????? what...........

MC just chilling the entire day while overbloting, even their overblot monster just floating behind them in peace and waving at times when people look for too long while everyone else is wary and giving them (+ grim who's always in MC's hold) a bunch of space while the teachers and dormleaders have their pens/wands/wtvr thr fuck at command just incase

but then everyone just realizes that??? MC isn't gonna???? do anything?????? and it kinda irritates them because why aren't you doing shit its freaking them out.

And lets say,,, ortho... as discreetly as he can... scans you. And it shows that you're perfectly fine??? like you aren't dying or in pain. It even shows the Blot monster being alright too like its just a guy standing there.

And now the confusion is up to 100 because WHAT????

MC and the Blot [+ Grim] just doing their everyday assignments and eating in the cafeteria with their friends being visibly tense and MC just raises an eyebrow like "whats wrong with yall tf" before continuing to absolutely DEMOLISH a burger they got for free. FREE!!! best day ever fr they'll tell you that much

I feel like the Blot would get sorta aggressive/protective when it comes to people who has like hurt MC to the point they had to take a nurse visit (half of the school but its alr we gang fr) but when it comes to crowley....??? They'll see the FULL POWER of a magicless blot monster which is actually more terrifying than the others.

The blot going hulk on crowley is so funny to imagine for me cause he'd just be running away and suddenly gets smashed into a pillar from a literal stomp. just one. and it was relatively weak compared to the Blot AND MC picking up and swinging that SAME PILLAR to smash it into crowley.

All that anger and other negative emotion finally coming out the SECOND they even so as HEAR that crows heartbeat nearby. It gave everyone whiplash but then again they also all collectively thought that he deserved it considering he hasn't truly done anything to HELP the students but just to HELP the schools reputation.

I'm half certain a student died there and he just covered it up and they turned into a ghost that haunts places. (i mean... look at the three ghosts in Ramshackle. they used to be students there I'm pretty sure????? i forgot.)

As MC is beating the DOG SHIT out of crowley the Blot is just cleaning everything up slowly because they realized that they dirted up the place :( and when MC is done they help too as the teachers all circle around a throughly beaten and bruised Crowley who has blood seeping out of his mouth while being half awake.

Of course they help him don't die because they honestly don't want the one helpful person to go to the equivalent of jail in twisted wonderland for committing murder and ykw thats so real.

I feel like as Mc stays in this overblot form everyone thats close-ish to them gets memories of things that's happened to them in the past like how MC did. But it's worse. I want an mc thats traumatized im sorry and i want it to be worse than what half of these guys went through.

I need them to feel guilty even more. Like. "Oh my god I really said that when— holy shit" FEEL BAD!!!!! Grim would already know their past because I know I would be cuddling into Grim's stomach and crying about everything.

When Mc finally stops "Overbloting", the Blot would still be there but as its own person :D How does this work????? it works bc I said it does.

The Blot™ would help MC a lot and vice versa, basically acting like parents now with how worried they get over everyone and the other. Grim is eating the attention up though as both Mc and The Blot cuddle as therapy (and bc they wanna)

Everyone (especially idia) would need time to like... get used to that because there's "NO FUCKING RECORD OF AN OVERBLOT BECOMING ITS OWN PERSON AND BEING....NICE?????"(shrouds words not mine ong) and when they do get used to it its like everyone is genuinely happier because! gasp! they are!!!

kick the crow out the seat. Both the Blot and Mc are the new headmaster contrary to the students voting them when Crowley got demoted from it.

I also feel like....??? Instead of MC goinf back home cause they realize just how BAD it was back home, they choose to have a bridge between both realities so that its their (friends and/or families) choice on if they want to be with them in twisted wonderland or not.

MC & Blot beating the shit outta Crowley as everyone watches (and cheers)

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p0ssywhippedcream · 8 months

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I put req in during the last TT, but it wasn't fulfilled due to what happened to you shortly after. And I don't blame you to be clear! Ive been waiting to resubmit it for next time and now I can! I would like to request an apollo x newly immortal! Wife reader, kinda like a continuation of those wedding night and proposal oneshots. Just something cute where he helps her adjust to immortality/ godhood.

Thanks, and take care! ✌️💋

Hi hun!! omg thank you for being so patient and im so sorry your last tt ask got lost in the storm!!!

❁❁❁❁

"Baby, you know you don't have to do that right?" He's smiling as he snakes a hand around your waist, grinning over your shoulder and meeting your eyes in the mirror.

Your feet shift on the cold tile of the bathroom floor. You look down at your toothbrush held in your hand, halfway through squirting paste on. "I know."

He notices the sadness in your eyes even when they're focused on something else. "Sunshine, what's up?"

You sigh. "You don't know how pointless it all seems now."

"What, all the junk mortals do? Setting alarm clocks and repainting houses and all that?" He nudges your neck with his nose, "It never made sense to me anyway."

"You've never been human, you wouldn't know." Your hand stutters and you set the toothpaste down. Apollo watches as you flick the faucet on and run your brush underneath.

"Are you mad I've made you immortal?" His voice is nervous, lips hesitant to follow through because what if he doesn't want the answer? What if he wants to be selfish and pretend you want it still just so he can keep you?

"No," You decide honestly, pausing to speak before shoving your brush in your mouth, "I just miss the little things."

Apollo stares at you curiously in the mirror as you stubbornly brush your teeth, a chore that could be avoided with a flick of the hand.

"Like?" He asks as you spit.

"Mmm.." Your head tilts and he chases it with a kiss to the cheek before standing tall and hugging your body tighter to his chest. "Laundry. I used to hate it, it takes forever and it's boring and sometimes I'd leave baskets for weeks just to avoid it. But today I went in our closet and my clothes were just... there. And I don't even have to put them on myself or wash them or fold them, they're already perfect all the time."

"And that's an issue?" He's genuinely confused, blonde eyebrows rolling in waves as he considers this.

"My mom spent hours teaching me how to do my laundry. She used to yell at me when I refused to do it. She put so much effort in the task of me having clothes ready and someday I'll forget how to even do it because she'll be dead and so is my need to do anything myself."

Your face is nearly unreadable in the mirror, your gaze on the tap as you rinse your brush until Apollo tugs your chin to face him with a thumb and forefinger.

"You don't want to outlive anyone." He knows it in the tremble of your lashes and the bite marks on your lips. You're anxious of being alone with only him as company and he could let it hurt his feelings but he doesn't. He can't outshine you anymore, even if he tried and he wouldn't want to in the first place.

"I don't know how to... I can't let go of myself, Apollo. My humanity is all I am, I don't know what I would be without my imminent mortality."

Your eyes are pinched and full of fear. You need answers, and he doesn't have them. But you also need familiarity and he can give you that.

"Honey," He gives you a chaste kiss, featherlight touch finding your hands as he pulls you to the bedroom, "You're still you. You just have more time."

You follow him with a furrowed expression as he sets you on the bed.

"Close your eyes." You raise an eyebrow and he makes a pleading face so you comply. "Open."

First, all you note is his body heat next to you and then you notice two laundry baskets full of clothes almost as warm as him.

He's giving you a sheepish smile, legs criss-crossed as he sits next to them. "Would you want to teach me? I can't do all this myself.."

You laugh, loud and unbroken as tears spring to your eyes. Apollo nearly tumbles off the bed when you launch yourself across the baskets at him. "I'd love to."

You face squishes against his, letting you feel the giddy grin that takes over him. He knows that humans are patchwork, messy and rushed and full of longing and while he may never understand (TOA say what), he hopes you never loose that part of you. It's what he first fell in love with after all.

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iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia · 11 months

Note

Hello, sorry to bother you. I got some requests if you're comfortable with it of course. It's never mention that MC have a familiar. But imagine this :

MC go to a trip without M6 and when MC come back, they suddenly bring a deer and that deer is actually MC familiar!

How would the M6 react?

The Arcana HCs: When MC shows up with a familiar

~ I've had multiple requests to write for MC with different kinds of familiars, but considering how the type of familiar reflects their master's personality, it's easier to keep it vague. Here's the closest I can get anon, hope you enjoy! - brainrot ~

Julian

Doesn't know what the new animal is until you tell him what the new animal is

Consequently very anxious around the new animal

This is your familiar. From what he knows of magic, familiars are a big deal

Also, the last time he interacted with a magician's familiar, she squeezed him because she thought scaring him was fun

He expects it to judge him as unworthy of you and doesn't want it to hate him

Is completely caught off guard when it reflects your own affectionate feelings for him instead

When he puts two and two together he melts and pledges his protection and doctorly services to it

He still doesn't get that Malak is technically his familiar so he's very confused and slightly intimidated about why they seem to get along so well

Asra

Needs no introduction, it's got you written all over it and is now their second favorite animal after Faust

A very, very close second favorite, according to him they're basically siblings

It's canon that they knit clothes for Faust, now they make matching accessories for your familiar

Teases you about how affectionate it is with him, like Faust doesn't already love you about as much as she loves Asra

Faust is a terrible, terrible influence and he enables it

She can and will find a way to teach it how to hold a knife and takes it on "training" excursions to get familiar with Vesuvia's shortcuts and terrorize a certain doctor

Scolding them does not work, you'll have to put them in time out in separate rooms

Asra sneaks messages back and forth if they can't get you to relent

Nadia

Completely focused on the logistics of making it feel as welcome and cared for as possible

Makes whatever changes it could need so your chambers are an ideal habitat for it to come and go and relax

Ensures access to dietary needs

If the familiar is amenable to the idea, finding a loose collar or ornament that marks it with her seal so it can wander around the palace grounds without interference

Doesn't really consider the possibility of bonding with it until she sees how well it gets along with Chandra

And apparently how friendly it seems to be with her? She's never spoken to it, why would it act so loving - oh. Oh

Goes out of her way to praise and bond with your familiar at least once a day. They're very good friends now

Muriel

Doesn't need to be told who the animal is

Immediately lights up because he's genuinely happy that you've found a companion to go through life with. Inanna pulled him through a lot and he hopes that it will do the same for you

Also because he likes animals, all animals, and this is a new one to study and nurture

Speaks to it like it's a person that he likes

Makes all kinds of thoughtful accommodations for it without ever saying a word or letting on that that's what he's doing

Inanna adopts it

You'll see her full mother wolf instincts come out, this is a creature very new to being a familiar and it doesn't necessarily know all of its responsibilities yet

Don't worry, she'll teach it for you. They go on patrol together and she's very protective

Portia

Oh, cute animal

She's sorry that's your what? That's so cool!!!

Squeals

Tell her all the details. How did you meet? What was the first thing you thought when you saw it? What type of animal is it exactly? Did you know right away, like love at first sight? Describe it for her

Treats it like she does Pepi, it's a pet with extra magic that's mysteriously connected to you and therefore very cute

Over the moon when it acts friendly with her. Holds her breath because she's worried her squealing will scare it off

Makes treats for it like she does for Pepi

If Pepi wasn't already such a beloved cat, she would be jealous

Pepi does go through a phase of bringing her hunting trophies to your familiar instead of Portia as tokens of friendship

Lucio

Does not know what it is until you tell him 2.0

Accepts it into the mini family with no hesitation. He's always had an enthusiastic (though at some points misguided) approach to collecting and caring for animals

It's part of the menagerie now

Very, very proud when it's friendly with him

As limited as his own magical abilities are, he's fascinated by yours and is curious about all the ways a familiar does or doesn't assist you in that

Mercedes and Melchior are extremely enthusiastic in their welcome, to the point that you fear your new familiar might get bitten

Somehow that doesn't happen and they all get along splendidly, if not chaotically

Bonus points if it's white

#ask arcana brainrot #the arcana #the arcana headcanons #the arcana hc #asra the arcana #julian the arcana #nadia the arcana #muriel the arcana #portia the arcana #lucio the arcana #the arcana game #the arcana fluff #the arcana shitpost #asra alnazar #julian devorak #nadia satrinava #muriel of the kokhuri #portia devorak #lucio morgasson

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blanketbvby · 3 months

Text

A Demon's Guide to Anthropology

part: 3

Word count: 657

Tags: use of 'MC's and they/them pronouns, sensory sensitivity on MC's end, written to be seen as sensory processing disorder, written based on my experience with it but I tried to change it to be broader

Word: "sensory"

Beel's time to shine :], also this is genuinely such bad writing I'm sorry, gonna come back and edit this to be better some day lol

★• ——— –– -

Beelzebub is a lot more perceptive than people like to give him credit for. With brothers like his and being an athlete, he has to be in order to know what's going on.

Which is why it doesn't take him long to notice the way that MC shies away from a lot of foods, clothes, and objects. Completely random to the common eye, but Beelzebub is most concerned with the food issue.

It's not like MC doesn't eat, not at all, they're healthy and never skin out on a good, fresh meal, but they're always so odd with what they eat.

Meats are off the table most of the time, which isn't all that bad. A lot of people just don't like meat. But some drinks and a good few veggies and fruits added onto that is what confuses him.

Maybe MC was just a picky eater, which again is fine, Devildom foods are weird to get used to, but it also seemed prevalent in human foods, too. To Beel, it seemed completely random, from a few spicy foods to a few sweets and sours, in his eyes he couldn't find a common connection.

So with a breath, he knocked on MC's door and entered when he was allowed.

Beelzebub wasn't normally so nervous or anxious, but he knew human bodies were delicate and didn't want MC and their odd aversions to certain objects or foods to somehow leave a bad mark.

"MC," he began after entering and shutting the door. The human sat in their bed with their D.D.D. in hand, "I have a question."

Intruiged and curious as always, MC responds.

"What's up, Beel? Something wrong?"

"Are you okay?" MC blinks, a little caught off guard at the vague question. The giant demon stood above them, looking down and vaguely reminding the human of a large dog looking at a toy it was attached to.

"Uh- elaborate?"

"You don't eat some stuff and you don't touch some things."

To their credit, MC understood after a moment, and they tried not to seem rude by the way they gave a laugh and smile, shaking their head.

"Do you mean how I don't like touching certain fabrics or eating certain foods?" The ginger nodded at the question.

"That's kinda common for humans," MC explained, "It's called sensory sensitivity. Some textures feel really bad to touch or to eat, so I tend to avoid them. Nothing is wrong with me, I promise."

Beelzebub nodded in solemn understanding, sitting beside the mortal on the rather Plush and comfortable bedding. In his hands was a small box of cookies he knew they favored a lot that he'd taken with him. It took everything in Beelzebub's power not to tear the box open and have at the cookies himself.

"So you can't have some foods or wear some things because they feel weird?"

MC nodded, though they didn't seem very down about it. To them, it was simply another day like any other, knowledge as common as grass is green and Luke despises anything demonic.

To Beelzebub, though, it solidified his resolve as he passed the now opened box of cookies over, one in hand and another in his mouth.

"What food can you not have? I'll eat them for you."

The serious expression to the previous words caused another laugh to bubble out of MC, and they took their own cookie from the box.

"It's hard to explain, but I'll pass you any whenever they come with a meal I have. Deal?"

Beelzebub nodded and put a hand on MC's head (the demon struggled sometimes with such casual affection and touch with most people, but had recently picked up on simply resting a hand on the mortal's head and leaving it there for a minute), and after a few moments a comfortable silence and sharing cookies, he spoke once more.

"Hell's Kitchen?"

"Hell's Kitchen."

#blanketbvby #obey me shall we date #obey me x reader #obey me mc #obey me beelzebub #obey me beel x reader #i did beel's so dirty im sorry 😭

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pineappleciders · 1 year

Note

Could we get headcanons for how would it be being Team Craig beloved adopted child? Like- idk- reader is this sweet kid who wants everyone to be happy and then Craig and Those guys are like- the protective parents while Clyde is reader's adorkable big brother 😱

craig and those guys adopting a sweet reader who acts like their kid/little sibling; platonic headcanons

includes: craig, clyde, tolkien, jimmy, and tweek

A/N: i know tweek technically isn't apart of catg, but since he often is in fanon i decided to add him!! people r always debating whether jimmy or tweek is in craigs gang but why not both!!!!!!

personally i see tweek as the butters of catg. like he's there sometimes but not all the time ykwim

whenever craig and tweek get into a dispute it's like watching your parents argue

despite you being the same age as tolkien, your parents often leave you with him as your babysitter (your parents love him to death) and you two always end up playing games and eating snacks

they're kind of. confused about you. like craig might treat you like butters at first but gets berated by the rest for it once they all realized ur actually cool and not stuck-up

jimmy ruffles your hair and treats you like you're his little sibling, and goes 'oooooo' and asks constant questions if you have a crush on someone

if you're shorter than tweek he leans on your shoulder or head, because he knows it pisses you off. then he giggles deviously about it

craig is kind of. always trying to get your evil side out. like he's completely convinced you're not 100% angel and he tries to annoy you to get you to get angry

u and clyde hang out a lot. like you're always at each other's houses, people at school started to actually think you two were related

lots of video game nights. you all come to someones house (usually tolkiens because he's loaded) and play video games on the couch and in his room all night long. also lots of sleepovers

i feel like when ur choosing teams for a sport or a game, some of them are begging for you on their team and some of them are begging that you aren't on their team

jimmy, tolkien, and clyde want u on their team. craig does not. he doesn't because he thinks u suck (he doesn't mean it, he just wants to be a dick. unless you actually do suck)

with tweek it depends. like he might agree with craig and he might not. it really depends on what the thing you're doing is

clyde leans on your shoulder when you two are standing in the halls with a smug look on his face (he wants to embarrass you)

tolkien (and sometimes jimmy) always help you with studying and homework. like they'll teach you the entire subject and make sure you're prepared for the test

jimmy cracks (un)funny jokes to embarrass you in front of your friends

they get all pissy if someones annoying you. craig in particular is not afraid to get physical if you're getting bullied or something. he'll never admit it though

tweek likes to annoy you, but he's also probably one of the more sentimental ones (next to tolkien and jimmy). like he'll be there for you emotionally and stuff, even though he isn't always the best with feelings

jimmy is very encouraging. like if you're down or anxious about something he'll listen intently and give you the most motivational pep talk you've ever heard. he cares a lot and shows it with quality time and just being there!!!

tolkien is very good at listening. he might not understand everything you're going through, but he tries very hard to hear you out and give advice. he also reassures you that he's always there for you

craig isn't the best at showing his own emotions in the first place, so he's kinda. panicky if you're sad. he's learned a lot from tweek though, and will listen closely and try to validate what you say.

clyde doesn't always understand, but he tries. he'll listen to you talk and gives shitty advice, and is generally kinda knuckle-headed. he genuinely cares though

craig tells you about his silly little interests, and like forces you to play with stripe. he also rants to you about space and shit and you always fall asleep to it

whenever everyone falls asleep in the living room while playing video games, you're the one left awake, and you can't help but feel immense happiness at how peaceful they look.

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lychee-drinks · 1 year

Note

Can i request a scenario where

Vasco and jay's s/o take away cuddling access for a month? Like they're in a fight or something

Hope this wasn't too confusing!

Vasco and Jay’s reaction to their S/O taking away cuddling for a month after a fight

(a/n): don’t actually do this in real life

Vasco

So you and Vasco got into a fight over the fact that Vasco always chooses Burn Knuckles over you. You didn’t mind that he valued them a lot and part of the reason why you fell for him were his ideals in the gang. But more often than not, if he had the choice to go to the arcade with Burn Knuckles or to hang out with you, he’d choose Burn Knuckles.

This was a habit of his and it wasn’t the first time the two of you argued over this. Because sure, you understood the issues with gang violence going on and how he wanted to be a dedicated leader, but he was neglecting someone important in the process.

So in retaliation, you banned him from cuddling and a lot of affection from you.

Vasco didn’t know of course. You didn’t want to tell him.

Whenever you and Vasco met, Vasco was always affectionate and would hug you tight. But after your decision, you brushed him off.

“Sorry I’m not feeling it.”

And Vasco was dumbfounded, because you always hugged him back.

He thought nothing of it at first and eventually, he realized you weren’t being affectionate or even cuddling him whenever the two of you did hang out. If he was chilling at yours watching a movie, you would sit up the whole time.

It’s eating him up inside. It’s making him anxious and he’s asking Jace what’s up. He isn’t gonna hold himself back so he asks you what’s up and if there’s something wrong. He’s on his knees and everything.

“Hey, you’ve been really distant to me lately please tell me what’s wrong because it’s really eating me up inside.”

And then you feel bad. The look on Vasco’s face is that he was genuinely worried there was something you were hiding from him.

So you apologize to him, telling him that you just wanted to get some petty revenge, but he really needed to make a change. So he understood the message that he really needed to focus on you and you learned that you should never do something like this again.

Jay Hong

You and Jay got into a fight over Jay’s secretiveness. He’s always been the quiet type of guy, doesn’t really explain things and unintentionally leaves things out.

So then there’s a bad miscommunication between the two of you, not because you didn’t understand, but he didn’t explain something important to you. And it pisses you off because you just want to understand him better.

What’s the answer that you choose? To take away cuddling access for a month.

Jay is an affectionate person. He’s more hugging over talking much. So hearing this from you, it will sound like hell.

You’re upfront about it to Jay and he’s devastated. Jay is a person of few to no words at all and communicates through his affection.

Since you’re pissed at him, you turn down his advances and when you do so, he’s left standing there wondering why.

It’s a bit of a painful look he has that I don’t think you could continue doing that for a month.

So with Jay, don’t take away his cuddling access for a month over an argument because you will lose one of his main forms of communication and his hurt look will devastate you.

But once you really talk with him, he gets the message and really tries to make a change.

#esse sfw #woohooooo #another request that was probably submitted two years ago finally complete #lookism #jay hong x reader #jay hong #vasco #vasco x reader #lee euntae #i’m a little hesitant on posting this but #i finished it so why not

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orangesaek · 1 year

Note

hiii! could you please write fluff about haechan taking care of a sick s/o? im literally dying right now and something like that would be really comforting, thank u 🫶🏻

OMG i hope you're feeling a lot better now! Thanks so much for your request, and pls take care of your health 🥺🤍

a/n: slightly proofread

A loud clap in his face snapped Haechan out from his thoughts.

"Hey, focus!" Jeno reminded, chuckling at Haechan's distracted look. "Pull your shit together and do your best one last time."

Haechan only groaned in response.

"He's right," Jaemin chimed in. "You can finally visit your girlfriend once this is done. She's sick in bed, right?"

Haechan nodded in response before letting out a sigh for the nth time that day. He couldn't stop worrying about you ever since you got sick a few days ago, and he hated himself for being unable to visit you even once due to his packed schedules.

NCT Dream was waiting in the dressing room for their turn to perform for their final music show performance before they can finally take a few days of rest. Luckily for Haechan (and Mark), they had no other schedules lined up for the next few days as well for NCT 127.

"Don't forget to drop by the pharmacy to get her what she needs." Renjun kindly reminded. Haechan nodded again, feeling really grateful that his friends are just as genuinely worried about you.

After the performance, the boys quickly got dressed to leave, with Haechan being the quickest to get inside the van.

"Hyung, can you please drop me off over there?" Haechan asked their manager, pointing to the direction where a pharmacy was located.

"Just try not to get sick as well, alright? Inform me or Taeyong if you're gonna come home to the dorms tonight or not." their manager said before parking the van on the side of the road.

"Yes, hyung, I will." Haechan responded as he unbuckled his seat belt and quickly put on his disguise.

"Take care, and tell your girlfriend to get well soon." Mark said.

After saying a quick goodbye to his members and seeing the van leave, Haechan walked inside the pharmacy and took out his phone.

"Hi. Can I please have these?" He politely asked at the counter, showing a list of medicine and some other items for you.

"Thank you." he said as he left the pharmacy and rode a taxi on his way to your apartment, anxious to see how you were doing.

Meanwhile, you were peacefully sleeping in bed with a serious cold, not having the slightest idea that your boyfriend will be visiting you soon.

Haechan actually insisted for you to go to the hospital. But being a stubborn person that you are, you didn't listen to him anyway and just decided to stay in bed, assuring him that you'll be fine in a few days. 3 days tops, you said, which clearly wasn't the case at the moment.

A delicious aroma wafted in your room suddenly, disturbing your sleep, and prompted you to open your sleepy eyes and sniff the air.

"What...?" you mumbled to yourself groggily as you rubbed your eyes. Still lying in bed, you squinted your eyes to look at the window in case you left it open and the smell came from one of your neighbors in the apartment. Seeing that the windows were shut, you wondered where the smell came from and decided to check.

You (reluctantly) got up the bed and was just about to put on your slippers when the door to your room suddenly opened, revealing Haechan with a tray of food.

"Where are you going? Lie back in bed," Haechan said as he pointed to your bed with his lips, softly closing the door behind him with his foot.

You sat still on your bed in shock, confused as to why your boyfriend's in your apartment. Maybe it was just another extremely reaslistic type of dream, you thought, until he made his way to your bedside table and put down the tray.

"Are you seeing things? No. What am I doing here? To take care of your stubborn ass that I love. When did I get here? Half an hour ago. What about my schedules? They're all done and I don't have any other schedules for the next few days. What if I catch your cold? Doesn't matter." Haechan said with both arms on his hips and a smug look on his face.

"There, I've answered your questions, now lie back so I can start feeding you, naughty girl."

You blinked at him before snorting at his response in disbelief. Haechan just knew you too well.

You lie back in bed, adjusting yourself so you could sit comfortably. You looked up at Haechan, who was now sitting on your bed and pouring a glass of lemon water for you.

"I can't believe you're actually here..." you mumbled, affectionately placing a hand on Haechan's thighs. "Thanks, babe."

He put down the pitcher and held your hand tightly, heaving a worried sigh before looking at you softly.

"Don't worry about it, my love." he said as he softly brushed his thumb across your hand. "Just focus on getting better soon so we can go on a fun date, okay?"

You mouthed another thank you before Haechan picked up a spoonful of hot porridge, gently blew on it, and brought it to your mouth with his other hand positioned below to catch any spills.

"Mm, this tastes so delicious." you said, finally getting the source of the delicious smell earlier.

Although Haechan didn't usually cook for his members, he was actually pretty good. When you asked him about it some time ago, he said he can cook almost anything as long as there's a recipe he can follow.

"Glad to know. Eat up so you can take your meds and rest," he said as he brought another spoonful to your mouth. "Speaking of meds, when was the last time you took them?"

You actually forgot and just smiled sheepishly at him in response.

"Unbelievable." Haechan groaned and rolled his eyes at you in disbelief.

After eating and taking the medicine Haechan bought, he made you lie down in bed to rest as he scribbled down on your notepad.

"There," he said triumphantly. He brought the notepad to your face, showing a timetable he created for all of your medicine. "Oh, wait. I don't trust you enough, so I'm also going to set some alarms."

You only groaned in response, already dreading the amount of times your phone's going to blow off from all the alarms.

Haechan took your phone from the bedside table. A soft smile appeared on his face as soon as he saw your lockscreen—it was the very first picture you took together as a couple. The picture showed only your hands that was brought together to form a heart.

His smile grew bigger after he scanned his thumb on your phone for access, revealing his face as your wallpaper. It was a picture from one of his photoshoots that he loved.

"Aren't you such a big fan of me?" he chuckled teasingly. You chuckled dryly as a response but smiled after. Of course you love him with all your heart and soul. He's your everything.

"I seriously don't know what else I'm going to do with you if you still forget to take your meds after this." he said as he placed your phone back on the table. "I made sure the volume's in max."

"Should I be ready to get evicted from this place for noise complaints?" you asked jokingly. Haechan chuckled with a smirk before lying in bed with you. He placed his arm under your neck, bringing you closer, and you adjusted yourself comfortably in his arms.

"I'm really worried you're gonna catch a cold." you mumbled into his warm embrace, also taking in his sweet scent that you missed a lot. Haechan rubbed your back softly.

"I already told you, baby," he quietly said. "It hurts my heart to see you like this. I'd rather get sick than to leave you alone."

"I'm really sorry..." you responded, suddenly feeling guilt wash over you. You knew it was quite difficult for Haechan to manage between his schedules and personal life, so for him to come running to take care of you instead of resting or doing something relaxing in his free time made you feel guilty.

Haechan clicked his tongue in disapproval before gently placing his hand on your head and running his fingers through your hair soothingly.

"Don't even start." he softly reprimanded. "Just listen to me this time and focus on getting better, okay? I'm the happiest when you're healthy."

A comfortable silence filled the room for a moment, with Haechan's fingers still running through your hair.

"Anyway, I'm always going to be here for you. If you get sick again, then I'll just take care of you again." he added.

You didn't want to make him worried anymore, so you just hummed in response, feeling so grateful to have him by your side. Haechan placed a soft kiss on your forehead and started singing softly, his sweet voice being the last thing you hear before drifting off to sleep.

- end.

requests are still OPEN! feel free to send an ask ♡

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mins-fins · 1 year

Text

five chronicles — ricky shen

the five most important moments of their relationship in ricky's eyes.

tags :: ricky shen x m!reader , chronological but also non-chronological , ricky is super in love , specific descriptions bc i love them , ricky-centric , reader is a bundle of joy , they're made for each other , fluff start angst end

ONE. ( their first interaction )

of course, meeting someone for the first time is an important staple in any new relationship, but on a survival show, it's way weirder.

ricky wasn't really close to anyone but his fellow yuehua trainees, and he didn't even know if he would make friends, due to how awkward he was. he wasn't even sure what was going on when y/n first approached him.

now y/n, y/n is very pretty, like— super pretty, all ricky could do when he was talking to him was stare at his face, there seemed to be absolutely no mistakes on it, like he was carved by the gods.

"hi! ricky right?"

ricky pauses for a moment, clearing his throat as he gathers his thoughts. "um, yeah, yeah that's me" he responds, sounding much more awkward than he wanted to.

the unknown boy smiles. "sato y/n, it's nice to meet you!" he extends his hand for ricky to shake, and he takes it, noticing the major difference in their hand temperatures.

"i watched your introduction video, your very hilarious".

ricky feels his face burn red, he doesn't know for what, though. he just wasn't used to such words from random pretty boys, but he genuinely finds the compliment endearing.

"i.. thank you" he says, voice much lower than he intended. "that's very nice of you".

"ah, it's really no problem, complimenting people is just a second nature to me".

ricky simply laughs, waving his hand. "it's fine, i just admire your nice nature".

it was weird for someone to just walk up to him out of the blue, compliment him out of nowhere. ricky only really received compliments from his parents' friends, or random people on the street, not someone so much like him.

he always thanks himself in his head that y/n had approached him, because he didn't even realize how much of a turn his life would take from this point.

TWO. ( dream team )

"ah, were on the same team! how exciting!"

y/n comments unconsciously, addressing ricky, he doesn't look to him though, which confuses ricky greatly. he looks towards the male, who just rocks back and forth, whistling.

"you were talking to me?"

"yeah" he responds, smiling politely at the shen. ricky simply blinks, eyes stuck on his figure. he can't help but stare, he's pretty, super pretty, he has this soft smile on his lips and his brown eyes look like they hold universes in them.

is it bad to stare? he might look like he's glaring, and that would just be a field day for all those mnet editors. he sighs and looks away, putting his hands behind his back.

they were on the same team, performing back door by stray kids. it was safe to say that ricky was nervous, but y/n seemed to be confident. ricky wanted to have that kind of attitude, but he just couldn't.

he found his hands shaking almost constantly, his stomach felt all over the place, and as he found himself backstage, he felt his fight or flight instincts kick in as he almost bolted away.

"jesus, are you cold?"

"no, i'm worried" he admits rather openly. y/n hums at the words, understanding.

"you have nothing to worry about, your going to do great" he whispers, and though ricky wants to believe the words, there's this thing that just makes him not want to.

"i want to believe that, but i can't".

"you can't?"

his hands start shaking almost faster as he's asked that question. they're up in a few minutes, he can't possibly explain it now.

still, he'll try.

"i don't know, it's like theres this barrier stopping me from feeling any kind of confidence, it's like it's making all of my anxiety escalate".

y/n doesn't interrupt him, just lets him talk, lets him pour out whatever feelings he has. he hums again, taking ricky's shaking hand. "alright, i get it, you feel anxious, take a deep breath".

the older male instructs, squeezing his hand as a way of encouragement. ricky doesn't know why he feels his anxiousness already going away, but he nods, taking in a deep breath, then exhaling.

"you know you shouldn't doubt yourself, right? everyone knows how amazing you are, and you did amazing during that practice, your gonna crush this performance, i'm sure of it".

y/n smiles at him once again, rubbing his hand for a moment before letting it go. "thank you, i really needed that" ricky mutters, not knowing what this strange fluttering feeling in his stomach was.

"it's really no problem, i just want to make sure my teammates are alright".

ricky nods, feeling his face go red once again when y/n pokes his cheek, giggling. "well, you better crush that stage".

THREE. ( a somewhat-strange conversation )

y/n had found his way into ricky's room, and eventually ricky's bed. it seemed to happen in a flash, where he had just woken up and now there was just this random pretty boy in his bed.

not that he was complaining, of course.

y/n looks up, his head still laid onto ricky's pillow. "so" he begins, starting another one of his somewhat strange conversations, he rolls over as he stares at ricky's figure.

"so?" ricky asks, craning his neck to turn and look at y/n, who was staring back with that signature smile of his. "so what?"

"what do you plan to do after the show? if you don't debut that is.."

ricky shrugs, fully turning around so he could get a better look at him. "i'll probably just go home, my parents want me to take over their company".

y/n snorts, amused. "ah, so you're that kind of rich, you could buy mnet if you wanted to!"

ricky laughs, and y/n continues. "you really took young and rich way too seriously".

he nods, enamored by the males words. "and what about you? what do you plan to do?"

y/n hums, flopping back down onto ricky's bed. "i'll probably just go back to school, i almost quit for this shit".

"i have no doubt you'll debut" ricky says almost unconsciously, the words had been on the tip of his tongue for what seemed like forever.

the older male laughs. "i have no doubt you'll debut" he emphasizes the you'll, as if he's saying a completely different sentence. "you've got this".

"you have a lot of confidence in me, but you never talk about yourself" ricky questions, yet it doesn't really come out like a question, more of a blank statement.

"if it happens, it happens, i'm just moving with the flow" he responds simply. ricky doesn't really understand that whole mentality, but he just laughs at y/n's words.

what a spectacle he is.

FOUR. ( favorite couple )

"whose your best friend, n/n?"

y/n hums, pretending to think when he knows his answer will be ricky. the two of them are clearly pretty close, he's the type of person to become best friends with someone after only a few hours of knowing them, and his answer was almost obvious if anything.

"ricky! right? were very close" he replies, the answer on his mind, almost rehearsed. ricky freezes, as if he didn't expect that. he had spent the past few days with him, just talking to him, he enjoyed his company, and y/n showered him with hugs and affection.

"me? i've never really been someone's best friend before" he mumbles, the gratefulness in his voice clear.

y/n giggles as he intertwines their hands. "well, your mine now! you can't get rid of me!" he yells, leaning onto ricky.

ricky simply stares, a habit of his whenever y/n is around. he captures his attention so easily, not even having to do anything spectacular to. it's not everyday someone he'd just met no more than two months ago makes him feel so.. weird.

he simply found y/n endearing, amazing. he was the epitome of joy, so grateful for his opportunities and everything given to him. he's patient, doesn't force anyone into anything they don't want to. he loved everything about him, his eyes, his voice, his personality, his humor, his smile, his laugh, his—

oh, he's rambling now isn't he?

he just loves how he feels around him, he doesn't feel any of the other platonic feelings he's felt for the other trainees, he feels love, and not just in a friendship way, but in a genuinely romantic way.

y/n is just amazing like that.

"i don't plan on getting rid of you anyway" he teases back, leaning his head onto y/n's. the two look so cute, like a newly wed couple or something.

"aww, they look like a couple" junhyeon teases, earning boisterous laughter from taerae, who definitely agrees.

they just seem made for each other.

FIVE. ( our final goodbyes )

ricky was originally stressed.

he had been scratching his hands all day, worried that he might not be able to debut, he was so worried that he'd barely gotten any sleep the previous night. everything in boys planet had led up to this, and it was an obviously stressful day for everyone.

fortunately, y/n was right there.

"calm down, ricky, nervousness makes your posture bad".

he runs a hand up and down ricky's back, and ricky can't fathom how he's so calm. "how are you so calm? you should be biting off your nails by now".

"as i said, if it happens it happens, just don't stress yourself out about it so much, i'm sure you'll make it".

y/n was right.

as ricky sits in his chair, having won at p04, he crosses his fingers in hope that y/n's name will somehow be called next. he finally made it, but he wanted to make sure y/n did too, he wanted to at least debut with him.

p03: seok matthew.

p02: sung hanbin.

p01: zhang hao.

there's really only a sliver of hope left, anyone could be called for p09, anyone could become the final member of the group, and he hopes to god that y/n makes it, he doesn't know what'd he do if he didn't.

"and rank p09 is.."

y/n y/n y/n y/n y/n y/n y/n y/n y/n y/n—

"han yujin!"

oh.

ricky closed his eyes. he's grateful, but also angry, so angry. at himself. he made it and y/n didn't. after all he did for him? after he encouraged him to do his best? after he made sure that everyone felt alright and were in their best head spaces for the performance?

he wants to cry.

he can't.

he wants to throw up.

he can't.

ricky went into this survival show stuff thinking nothing of it. he didn't expect to debut, he didn't expect to be loved, he didn't expect to fall in love.

and, he didn't expect to be so heartbroken over y/n not debuting with him.

he finds it even harder to accept as he watches y/n cry, hugging junhyeon in the crowd. his face stays still, not moving, as if he's unaffected, but he truly can't bring himself to come to terms with it.

all he wanted to do was to talk to y/n.

he immediately began searching for him when he stepped into the crowd to say goodbye, giving both jay and jeonghyeon hugs as he searched for the seemingly invisible boy.

"there you are" his voice whispers. ricky sighs, smiling, although disappointed.

"here i am" he replies, face not moving. y/n has dry tears on his face, but he's still smiling. "i told you, i was sure you'd make it".

ricky bites his inner cheek, the words only having been told to him a few hours ago. "yeah, guess you are a fortune teller".

"i couldn't tell my own fortune though".

even if he's trying to cope with humor, it seems to not work, as tears start welling up in his eyes once again. "i'm so proud of you, you know that?"

"y/n—"

"i became friends with you because you were cool, i seriously do still think your cool, i was so amazed by everything you did, and when you agreed that i was your best friend, it made me feel special, you made me feel special".

ricky isn't sure how he keeps his composure, even with all the shouting and chatter going on around him, y/n is the only person he sees, the only one he hears, his only focus.

"i wanted to debut with you.." he mumbles, taking his hands, probably for the last time.

y/n smiles, and ricky wipes the tears from his face. "me too, but you did it! go on, have fun with your group".

it felt like a piece of him was being broken away, as if this was one of the most heartbreaking moments of his entire life. he takes a deep breath and wipes y/n's tears away.

ricky pulls him into a hug, sighing. "i'm so sorry, i— i failed you".

"you didn't" y/n chuckles, running a hand up and down his back. "it's okay, you made it, that's all that matters".

but you matter too, he wants to say. the words are on the tip of his tongue, he wants to say them so bad, but he couldn't, like he was being prevented from doing so.

"don't think it's your fault, i'm still proud of you, okay?"

ricky nods, he doesn't want to let go, but he has too, because he has to go, everything has to end eventually.

he finally lets go of y/n's hands after what seems like forever, but he still can't seem to step away.

"you know i love you, right ricky?"

the words seem so random, but y/n is random, even through tears and with everyone else talking in the background, he still finds the confidence to say those words.

"i love you too" ricky replies.

that was probably the last time he'd ever say those words.

AUTHORS NOTE — HOLY MOTHER OF GOD this was tragic!!! i genuinely felt like sobbing while writing this wtf ╥﹏╥

#shen quanrui #ricky shen #boys planet 999 #ricky boys planet #zerobaseone #zb1 #zb1 ricky #male reader #fluff #angst #kpop imagines #𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!

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