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kojinnie · 3 years

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Why you should NOT date AOT boys...

Headcanon on what kind of headache you're bound for when dating the AOT boys, and why I advise you NOT to date them! Enjoy, loves!

levi - eren - armin - reiner

part two here | erwin - zeke - jean - connie

— LEVI

He's an incredible man with a lot of talents and he'd be doing real good at his job, that dating him would give you a huge sense of pride. However, this man suffers from being emotionally constipated. He'd always keep you in the fine line of "are we or are we not?", even though you’ve been seeing each other for a long time. He’d never say “I love you” or any type of flashy display of affection. His love language is acts of service and quality time, so if you’re the type to wanting outward reassurance of how someone feels about you, Levi’s not gonna be the person to give you that.

This problem stems from his deep, unresolved insecurity about the nature of relationship. It’s not just the “Am I good enough?”, he genuinely thinks that he is not a good person, and thus the inherent belief that everybody will abandon him in the end — something he picks up from his traumatic childhood. He’s wary about establishing relationship because he’s afraid to succumb into his own feelings and vulnerability. He fears at certain point he has to feel and suffer the emotional consequence of being left by someone he cares for. He dreads the idea of getting caught off-guard with being fragile.

You gotta be extremely patient and understanding when it comes to Levi, the reassurance needs to come from you, and frequently too. Bluntly saying, “I’ll stick around” or “I’ll accept your shortcoming” is really soothing for Levi, because although he never shows it, he really thinks he does not deserve you.

— EREN

If you wanna be frustrated in a relationship where you constantly feel like you’re in an endless coaster, then dating Eren gotta be your poison. Sure the honeymoon phase was intoxicating, sure he makes you feel like the prettiest girl in the world. The morning text, the playful neck peck out in the public, the butterflies you feel in your tummy when you catch him staring at you even from afar with those oh so enthralling green eyes. But once the honeymoon phase over, Eren is quick to get bored. Especially if you’re an unproblematic, matter-of-fact type of person. Eren likes to fight, he gets thrilled by it, and he’s high with the rush of adrenaline. He likes it if you’re jealous, if you sulk, if you argue. He likes you to be ‘childish’ because then he gets to be the adult, the savior, the knight in shining armor. It grinds his gears. If you’re unfazed by his antics, if you’re easy to forgive, if you’re chill, Eren will think that you’re not really into him, and will exit the closest door out before his ego gets bruised even further.

Eren is sort of babied by people around him – his parents, his friends, and constantly being compared to his older brother doesn’t help either. He realizes that he got saved a lot of times by a lot of people. And this creates a deeply rooted insecurity with him that turns into an incessant impostor syndrome. The constant thought of not being good enough and the idea that all the achievement he’s ever got was the result of someone else’s help really crush him. You can shower him with praises and reassurance, but he would completely dismiss it, because he thinks your compliments are not based on objective views and that he does not deserve it. He painfully seeks for approval from any authority figure that (he thinks) does not have any emotional connection with him. And it can be really hurtful when he constantly dismisses your sincere compliments while desperately chasing from others who don’t care about him.

— ARMIN

It’s really hard to hate Armin. He’s a really nice man through and through, but what is his strength can also be his deepest weakness. He’s too nice and unsure about a lot of things. He knows he is knowledgeable, but he often doubts himself for being too ‘text-book smart’. Which is a valid cause, because at times he would get very oblivious to how relationship works, and treat feelings like it’s a quantifiable system. It will literally take years for him to finally get down and say how he feels about you, because all these times he was so busy filling the check-list in his mind to convince himself whether you truly like him or not, even though you couldn’t be any clearer with your intention towards him.

He is perceptive with what you think and how you feel, unfortunately this does not materialize into any action as he doubts his own intuition when it comes to his significant other. He fears that his own sentimentality has affected his intuitive judgment and thus deems it invalid, which is completely untrue because every hunch he has about you has always been accurate! That’s just how much he understands and knows you from years of quietly observing and taking each of your word into account.

He really relies on you sitting him down and telling him in details how you feel and the things you expect from him. He will do it, in a flash with no hesitation, but really, he just needs that verbal affirmation that he is doing the things that you want, and it’s not just based on his assumption. So, if you like sweet surprises, impulsive dates and expect your significant other to read your mind, Armin might not be the person.

— REINER

Oh my, truthfully, he is such a sweetheart, and can be completely smitten for the entirety of his life if he has found that one person. However, it’s a treacherous road for both Reiner and you to get to that stage. Initially, when you start to get closer to him, he may seem rigid and uninterested. The first date you had with him probably went awkward and although you really liked him, you were pretty sure he didn’t like you back, until he texted you the morning after, asking for a second date. That’s basically how being with Reiner is, a series of you being sure that he feels nothing towards you, only for his following action to prove the otherwise. He is really awful in displaying his emotion, he tries to be stoic all the time, and it often frustrates you because you cannot really tell how he feels, and you fear that you might have hurt him without realizing.

He may start to open up, only when you open up first about yourself. He thrives in romance with someone who he thinks shares his inner pain, and that’s very important for him, because he is always in a position where everyone expects him to be strong, and to have a significant other that understands his struggle is all he wants. But this gets hard for you, because sometimes Reiner’s sadness can be quite extreme and you cannot match that. Once Reiner realizes that you’re not on the same boat, he may become withdrawn, as he thinks he’s a burden and inadequate for you, and may end up self-sabotaging the whole relationship he has with you.

Although he does not like to admit it, but Reiner often slips into his sadness too deep, that it almost seems like he victimizes himself with his self-hatred. He will be the one to say stupid shit like, “You deserve someone better.” Or “I cannot make you happy.” When in fact you are perfectly willing to be with him all the way through.

With Reiner, you gotta be the bigger person, with bigger gestures and bigger patience. It’s because Reiner needs an anchor and a figure to lean on. In returns he would be the best lover that you will ever have for he is selfless and will be helplessly devoted to you.

Racking my brain writing for the rest of the boys (Erwin, Jean, Connie, Pocko) because they're the ones we SHOULD date.

Update: Thanks thanks thanks for everyone who read this! I received a lot of love and you dunno how much this encourages me to keep going. Anyway, 2 things:

- My Masterlist

- Talk to meeee ♡

[ON-GOING REQUEST EVENT]: Kojinnie's 200 Followers Celebration - 24/7 Writing Event

#aot headcanons #snk headcanons #levi headcanons #eren headcanons #armin headcanons #reiner headcanons #levi ackerman #eren jaeger #armin arlert #reiner braun #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #aot levi #aot eren #aot armin #aot reiner

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sadomas0chist · 3 years

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perfect strangers

MINORS DNI // 18+

part one; part two; part three

genre: nsfw // fluff

pairings: jean kirschtein x female reader

word count: 4k

tags/warnings: slow burn (?), penetrative sex, dom jean, praising kink, slight breeding kink, oral sex (male receiving), fluff, confessions, cute jean (yes this needs a warning) cheesiness.

synopsis: you discover something jean has been keeping for himself and it ends up adding all the puzzle pieces together.

a.n: i don’t usually add songs for you to listen to while reading my work, but if you want to get in the mood stream Last Days Of Summer by Summer Walker. thank me later.

i would also like to add that this was meant to be a short series. i got other fan-fiction ideas and need to answer some of your requests. also, i know this part is kind of cheesy but jean is a big softie i can’t help it.

“Connie, what’s taking you so long?” I yelled from our porch, swirling my car keys around my finger. I heard more shuffling coming from our apartment before Connie rushed out, Jean following him, throwing his hoodie on, covering the shirt that was squeezing his muscles.

“I was looking for my dab pen,” he took a hit and blew the smoke in my face. I coughed pushing his shoulder making him miss the step and almost colliding with the ground. I snickered and walked past Jean to my car door before he grabbed my arm and pushed me back.

“Passenger seat babe.” he looked down at me with his lazy smile. I scoffed swatting his arm away, only to be lifted from the ground. “Jean you prick!” I yelled moving my legs around.

“And I’m the kid.” Connie laughed getting in the backseat, clearly not suspicious of his homie’s behavior. I sighed getting into the passenger seat and crossed my arms.

Jean mirrored my action, before cussing, as he felt squeezed by how tiny the space was. “Damn aren’t you a small thing?” he teased backing up the seat so he could feel more comfortable. He smacked my thigh making my eyes widen. I looked down to see him holding out his hand, motioning me to give him the keys. I rolled my eyes and slammed them down his hand. He chuckled before shaking his head and mumbled something underneath his breath.

He wrapped his arm around my seat, tilting his head backward, putting the car in reverse, and slowly drove back. He winked at me before he shifted gears. The car ride was basically Connie singing out loud to songs and Jean casually joining in, their interaction reminding me of Hitch and I.

After what happened last night, I texted the girls’ group chat and told them everything that happened and how Jean was suddenly becoming more and more possessive which was honestly uncalled for. If I want to overthink it, he was always somewhat flirtier with me than he was with any girl when we used to hang out back in the day. However, Sasha and Mikasa didn’t elaborate much into it as they told me to shrug it off, whilst Hitch was rather excited about me having a ‘sneaky link’.

And honestly, I’d be lying if I said he didn’t turn me on… I mean look at him. He’s at least 6 feet tall with sexy sleeve tattoos and a gorgeous mullet. His stubble fit him perfectly and his jaw was sharp. He looked so different and delicious.

“We’re here!” Connie shouted into my ear, shaking me off of my thoughts. Jean had already parked and was taking his seatbelt off. I followed his gesture and got out of the car, carefully closing the door behind me, Connie already outside taking a few hits of his dab pen. Our gaze locked, his lips instantly forming into a smile as he threw his arm around my shoulders and brought my head closer to his lips, kissing my temple. I grinned wrapping my hand around his torso and leaned my head on his shoulder.

I was lucky to have a brother like him. He always made sure I was okay and had everything I need and wanted. He was my support system and I couldn’t ask for more. “All good?” he mumbled, tilting his slightly towards Jean who was typing something on his phone, probably waiting for us before going into the diner.

I nodded and he squeezed my arm. “Come on, let’s go inside, the weather is chilly today.” Jean held the door open as we walked in and spotted an empty table. It was connected to a couch, two other chairs placed on the opposite side of the table.

I sat on the couch, my back relaxing into the soft red leather, before feeling the seat dip next to me. I tilted my head, only to be met with Jean’s cocky expression. Connie managed to sit on one of the chairs and tapped his fingers on the wooden table. “Y’all in the mood for burger and fries?”

“Yeah, I’m fucking starving,” Jean stated leaning back into his seat, spreading his legs. I nodded and took out my phone from my pocket setting it on the table. We called over for the waitress and placed our orders. “I forgot to ask you, how are your studies going y/n?” he added, dropping his head on his fist that rested against the wood and looked at me. Connie rested his elbows on the table, intrigued by the conversation.

“I’m doing good actually. I still have some things to get done and I’ll finally have some free time for myself. I honestly can’t wait until I’m done with this semester. It’s so tough and for what.” I whined, dropping my head against my crossed arms. His hand wrapped around my shoulder and pushed me towards him, my head colliding with his chest. Taken off guard, my arms wrapped around his torso. “Aw, come on you’ll do great, you got nothing to worry about.” he patted my head and gently stroked my hair. I blushed at his move, my stomach forming a knot. He was being extremely soft and gentle and I'd be lying if I said that it wasn't surprising.

“Here you go.” the waitress cheered placing our food down. She eyed Jean before averting her gaze from him as he pushed me closer to him, my head closer to his chest. I breathed into his cologne and managed to hear his heartbeat. Fast. His heart was beating so fucking fast.

Connie didn’t seem to mind as he laughed at his phone before turning it to Jean, showing him the picture of a half-naked model showing off her ass, a man who looked to be her boyfriend standing next to her. “Baldie I’m still here.” I scrunched my face. “Although the dude is kinda hot,” I added. Once the following words left my lips, Jean’s hand swiftly moved down my ass to grab it, making me slightly jump. I looked up to see him glaring down at me then looked back at Connie’s phone. Did this just happen?

“Doesn’t she have a boyfriend?” He cocked his eyebrow making Connie roll his eyes. “Man you used to like it when I showed you pictures like that." he shook his head locking his phone. He stayed silent for a few seconds before pointing at Jean with a big grin. "Oh my god, you are seeing someone!” he whispered.

I removed myself from Jean’s grasp and adjusted my clothes as I dived into my food, enjoying the warm feeling down my throat. “Nah dude, although I must admit that I've been thinking nonstop about someone lately,” he confessed taking a bite of his burger, Connie doing vulgar movements with his hands before he did the same.

“Jesus Connie,” I whined throwing a fried potato at him. “We’re eating.”

“Um, excuse me?” He scoffed as Jean laughed, muttering a small 'here we go', obviously aware of what my brother was about to say next. “The Jean Kirschtein I know doesn’t catch feelings. This dude is a damn sex machine. Which I can relate to but you know what I’m saying." he raised his hands up. "Now tell me, who got you so wrapped around their fingers you can’t even flirt with other women now?” He paused before adding, “ And don’t think I forgot how you pushed off that girl who tried to grind on you two days ago at the club.” I frowned, all of this not making any sense to me. How could he be sleeping with me but seeing someone else at the same time?

I felt sick, my fingers dropping the sauce I was about to pour on my fries as I excused myself to the bathroom. I made my way into the small area and looked at my reflection. I felt dirty. I felt used. Was I going to wreck a whole relationship? Or whatever he calls it.

The door swung open minutes after, revealing Jean. He had a serious expression on his face as he approached me, my ass now pressed against the sink, his tall frame towering me.

“Why’d you leave?” he questioned moving my hair from my face, cupping my cheeks. “I wanted to wash my hands,” I replied trying to free myself from his grasp but miserably failed. I frowned as I tried to push him away again, but his hands grabbed my wrists holding them down. “I don’t believe you, I think you got jealous,” he smirked, his lips inches away from mine. I glared at him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction he was seeking.

“Jean let me go. Someone might walk in and Connie is waiting for us outside, also, the food won’t stay hot for long and I want to-“

“I was talking about you silly.” he interrupted me, his thumb now rubbing my bottom lip. “You’re so fucking gorgeous it’s unreal,” he mumbled. “Can I kiss you?”

What was happening… I stared into his eyes that were focusing on my lips. Could he be telling the truth? What if he just wants to get in my- oh wait, he already did… Fuck that was so overwhelming.

“Jean I don’t think it’s a good idea-“

“Yes or no?” I thought for a moment before softly nodding. “I need to hear it.”

“I want you to kiss me…” I whispered almost as if I didn’t want anyone to hear me, including him. I’ve always felt different around Jean and I never knew why, at least until now. He smiled lifting my head up with his finger under my chin, his lips resting against mine gently. My hands gripped onto his hoodie, kissing him with much passion.

I felt safe. I felt good. I felt content.

“You got my heart working overtime, y/n.” he confessed. I wasn’t able to process everything as it all felt like a fever dream. What if I just wake up and it turns out to be a dream. Did he just confess that he likes me in a diner’s restroom? My heart was beating so fast, my thoughts furiously rushing through my brain.

After Jean left to study in France, we never kept in touch. It is true that we used to be friends because of his friendship with Connie and it always felt different from my other friendships with other men like Eren or Reiner, but the distance and the lack of communication turned us into strangers and killed the ‘connection’ that was bonding us. I thought it was just a tiny teenage crush, but ever since he came back, everything returned to the way it used to be.

“Connie is probably getting worried about me.” I said making him let go of my grasp, his eyes still holding the same expression as before. I made my way out of the restrooms and slid my hands into my pockets. “Hey, I was about to follow you, you good?”

“Absolutely.” I smiled at him and sat back down taking small bites of my food.

“Y/n, you know you can talk to me about anything right?” he took a sip of his soda looking at me worryingly. “Of course, I’m fine really.” I reached out to squeeze his hand. A few minutes went by and Jean was back on the table with us. We jumped from a conversation to another, casually laughing as we brought back the old days.

Connie proposed to drive back and we didn’t mind since we both fell full from the food. Jean sat in the passenger seat as I lead down on the backseat, texting the girls every single detail of what happened today. It didn’t take them long to start bombarding me with replies.

‘Holy fuck he said what now? He’s fucking WHIPPED.’

‘I did hear him saying something about a girl when we hung out with Connie four days ago but I would have never thought that it would be about you…’

Seriously Sasha? I sighed and locked my phone dropping it on my chest. It didn’t take us long to arrive at the apartment we were now sharing with him.

***

I dropped on my bed, stripped down naked as my blanket was the only material covering me. I thought about what Jean told me back in that diner. I sighed closing my eyes. As I was almost about to fall asleep, my phone chimed on my nightstand.

I reached out to grab it, the message showing on my lock-screen making me open wildly my eyes.

-jean

you up? if you are, can i come into ur room?

I hesitated, my fingers hovering over my keyboard, occasionally typing something then deleting it.

-me

why? wassup?

It didn’t take him long to text me back.

-jean

i can’t sleep and i want to talk to you

I sighed typing a simple ‘okay’ and got up to put a shirt on. I heard a light knock on my door as I slid on the fabric, my hand reaching out to turn the doorknob.

“Hi,” I stepped aside, indicating him to come in before carefully closing the door. He sat on my bed and tapped on the mattress. I sat next to him and waited for him to talk about whatever he’s been wanting to get off his chest.

“About what I said earlier, uhm,” he cleared his throat.

“If you’re here to say that you didn’t mean it, you could have said it over text.” I assumed raising my eyebrow. It wouldn’t be the first time something like that happened to me and I wasn’t in the mood to deal with any bullshit, especially after getting my feelings mixed up. If he was about to mess around, I should do the same and ignore whatever I was feeling, hoping it would fade away over time.

“No, why would I do that?” he frowned and looked at me weirdly. Oh well, spoke too soon I guess. “I just wanted to make sure I didn’t make you uncomfortable. Listen y/n,” he paused searching for the words. “I don’t want you to think I’m doing this to get laid. We made an agreement and if I just wanted to have sex with you I wouldn’t have said anything about well, liking you.”

I stayed silent waiting for him to finish. The moonlight was the only source of light in the room as it peeked through my window. It was quite peaceful. “I think, no, I know I’ve liked you for a while. I never acted on it because your brother once threatened me jokingly about messing me up if I hurt you, and regarding the person I used to be, I would have most probably ended up hurting you and because of that, I decided to sleep on whatever I was feeling and hoped I'd move on from it. But holy fuck you and grew into such a smart and beautiful woman, I couldn’t help but let my feelings for you emerge again.” He cupped my cheek with his hand bringing me closer.

Fucking hell someone pinch me right now, I must be dreaming.

“However if you don’t like me back, or don’t want to hook up with me anymore, I’d totally understand.” I stared at him as I felt like I was looking at a different person. Now I get why Connie was so surprised when he heard Jean talking like that back at the diner. That wasn’t the Jean I was used to, or at least the Jean he became when he left for college. I wasn’t familiar with this new character development if I might call it.

“Why… why are you telling me all of this now?” I whispered, shifting in my seat to sit closer to him, our knees slightly brushing against each other. He brought his hand around the nape of my neck and pulled me closer to him. “You got my mind going crazy.” and with that, I pressed my lips against his, instantly feeling his lips kiss me back.

I straddled his lap and slid my tongue between his lips, our kiss sloppy and slow. His hands moved down to grip my ass, pushing me further to him, my bare cunt brushing against the soft fabric of his shorts. A moan escaped my lips as he gripped the hem of my shirt, lifting it, my nipples exposed to the chilly air. "Wait..." I pulled away and rested my hands on his chest. "We're gonna have to tell Connie."

He smiled and reached out to kiss me again. "First thing tomorrow. I don't think your brother is that oblivious anyway." he chuckled and squeezed my hips. I laughed, bringing his face closer to mine kissing him gently.

Our make-out session became more urgent ad rushed. Jean lied back, his hands resting on my waist as I took off my shirt. His hands reached out to grab my breast, fondling it with his big hand. My hips moved against him, the feeling of wanting to be filled by him becoming unshakeable. Removing myself off his hips, I crawled down and pulled down his sweats along with his briefs, his erection slapping against his stomach. I smirked at him as I began pumping his length, soft groans escaping his lips. I swirled my tongue over his tip and slit before sliding him down my throat, coating him with my spit. "Shit," his hips bucked forward, his cock going deeper down my throat. I started bobbing my head, my tongue running over his underside, feeling the pulsation of his prominent vein. Our eyes locked, his mouth agape and his chest slightly rising from his deep breathing. His hand fell on his eyes as he threw his head back, his fat cock now throbbing.

“Y/n, ah, fuck-“ he hissed grabbing a fistful of my hair and guided my head. I knew he was close and it made me wet as well. My fingers were already rubbing circles on my sensitive bud, my climax as close as his. I removed his dick from my mouth and straddled his lap. I aligned him to my entrance and slowly sunk onto him, sighs leaving both of our lips.

He felt insanely deep within me, his size stretching perfectly. I rested my hands on his chest as I ground on him, his hand lacing around my neck to bring me closer to him, his lips capturing mine in a passionate kiss. His tongue slipped in my mouth as his hand made their way to my ass, squeezing my cheeks and moving me upwards. I moaned into his mouth, my nipples brushing against his chest. I sat back up, my hands prompted back on his chest as I bounced my ass on him.

“Ride my cock baby just like that.” he moaned out. We were both already close to our orgasm, the sensitivity sending us off the edge. “You ride me so good, but-“ he sat up pushing me off him. “I want to fuck it in you,” he smirked pulling me off the bed and walking me to the wall, my back pressed against it. He wrapped his arms underneath my thighs and lifted me up, my legs snaking around him.

“Now stay quiet while I stuff you eh?” he breathed, pushing his tip inside me before thrusting his hips forward, almost hitting my cervix. My face hid in the crook of his neck, doing my best to silence my moans. My back moved against the cold wall, his whimpers and moans growing louder in my ear.

I shut my eyes close when he began rolling his hips faster, my orgasm rushing through my body. “Jean…” I whimpered tugging on his hair, my heels digging in his back. My arm was wrapped underneath his, my fingers scratching his back. I clenched around him making him hiss and fuck me harder, indicating that he was also close to reaching his climax.

“You wanna come with me?” I nodded staring at him with half-lidded eyes. “Yeah…” I mumbled out, biting down on my lower lip to keep quiet. “Yeah?” he mocked with a smirk before he started kissing my neck, occasionally leaving small bites next to my collarbone.

I wrapped my arms tighter around him, my thighs shaking as my orgasm ripped through me. He quickly followed ropes of cum shooting inside me. He whimpered, stroking himself a little bit more before pulling out and carefully putting me down. As soon as my feet touched the floor, his semen began leaking out of my opening down my leg.

“Well shit better clean that.” he ran his fingers up my legs before pushing his cum back in me making me gasp. “You’re good now,” he smirked before lifting me off again, this time in bridal style as he walked me to the bed, carefully putting me down. “I would’ve loved to shower with you,” he stroked my cheek, his body hovering over me. “But I don’t want your brother walking in on us like that. At least not before I tell him everything.” he poked my nose before kissing my forehead.

I nodded my head, smiling at him. “I like you so fucking much,” he admitted once again, this time his lips kissing mine.

“I like you too.” he cocked an eyebrow at my confession. “I knew it,” he whispered and kissed my cheek.

***

“Uhh, back the fuck up.” Connie pointed at Jean who was wrapping his arm around me in the kitchen. “You two like each other?” he waved his finger between us before stuffing his fork in his mouth again. I nodded and pushed myself closer to Jean. “Oh no.” he groaned pushing himself off his stool.

“No no no no no…” he repeated in annoyance as he walked past us. I frowned, turning to see him throwing himself on the couch. He threw his head back, another groan leaving his lips as he ran his hands us his face.

“I thought you’d be happy for me, what’s-“

“You had sex while I was in here?” he accused us dramatically in a high-pitched voice, faking his tears. Jean instantly laughed at his friend’s accusation. I let out a sigh of relief and shook my head before laughing at Connie who was fake gagging.

“We only did it the night you saw us together.” I played off. Connie gave me a ‘you think I’m stupid’ look and sighed.

“It was an everyday thing.” Jean corrected making me elbow his waist. He winced pinching my hip earning another hit. “Seriously man?” Connie whined. I mean, at least he wasn’t mad about us liking each other. The only thing that irked him, which is by the way overdramatized and ends up being one of his silly plays, is the fact that I had sex with him when he was sound asleep.

Connie sighed, his annoyed expression turning into a sly one. “I knew you two were fucking!” he laughed sticking his tongue out and clapping his hands. “Now that I’m positive that my sister got cuffed by someone I trust, I can finally sleep in peace.” I rolled my eyes before raising my hand to smack him but Jean pulled me closer to him making it impossible for me to move.

I looked up only to be met with his browns orbs already looking down at me with pure adoration. I could tell he was going to be one of the best things that have ever happened to me and I couldn’t be more thankful. Connie was still talking but I didn’t hear a word he said. Instead, I buried my face into his red hoodie and held him tightly. Who would have thought that my insignificant crush would actually make me feel so lucky?

“-she was and still is everything I’ve always wanted.” I heard him say before kissing my forehead.

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lushilove · 3 years

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𝙲𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝙾𝚞𝚝 𝙼𝚢 𝙽𝚊𝚖𝚎

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Eren x Reader

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𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘌𝘳𝘦𝘯 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥'𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩, 𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘱𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮. 𝘐𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵, 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘪𝘮, 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: Smut, 18+, fem!reader, moredn au, no plot, modern au, smut, rough and jealous Eren, overstimulation, edging, orgasm denial, mild degradation

Waking up after Friday parties is never really a pleasant experience.

Typically, there is the signature hangover which feels like your brain is doing acrobatics. For some, there is a walk of shame after trying to sneak out of a stranger’s house or maybe even finding numerous bruises from all the falls a person’s body had to endure throughout the night.

Well, none of those are as horrible as the way Eren Yeager stares down at you when you open your eyes after he taps your shoulder early in the morning. It takes you a while to actually register what you’re seeing.

Your eyes are heavy and you have trouble keeping them on Eren’s face, but when you feel someone’s arms softly wrapped around you, the tiredness is no longer present.

Surprised, you turn from Eren’s angry eyes to see Armin’s sleeping face as he holds you by the waist. You notice you must have fallen asleep on the couch with you sitting between his spread legs and your body pressed against his chest. There is Jean and Mikasa sleeping next to where you and Armin sit. Looking around, you notice Historia and Ymir cuddling in their sleep on the floor with Marco, Connie and Sasha nearby.

You swallow dryly, returning back to the green-eyed man who pulls you by an arm, away from your friend. Luckily, Armin stays asleep as you manage to stand on your own two legs with Eren pressing you closer to him. “Eren-” you try to talk to him, attempting to explain the situation even though you’re just as confused as he must be.

“Shut your mouth,” is all he says as he leads you to your shared bedroom, away from the sleeping bodies in the living room. You don’t even entertain the idea of disobeying him and let him pull you by an arm as he takes long strides forward. When you enter the bedroom, he quickly pushes your back up against the wall as he squeezes your forearms with force.

Somehow his touch both excites and scares you in this situation. “What is this supposed to mean? I’m gone for one night and when I return I find you sleeping on my best friend? Are you serious?” His voice is calm and collected, it’s his eyes that hold all the rage in the world.

You look at him, doe-eyed and scared to utter a single word. Desperately trying to remember what exactly happened the night before, you bite your tongue as if to wake you up properly.

Eren had to leave for his family’s get-together. Meanwhile, the rest of your squad decided to throw a small party over at your and Eren’s apartment, just like you did ever so often. Alcohol was flowing as if it was water and everyone messed around. Most of your memories are cut off right there, but you do remember dancing with Armin, a lot.

You bite your lip, trying to put the pieces together, but no other memories resurface. Your boyfriend takes in the expression you make and growls. “Wasn’t it you who always told me he’s just your friend? That I overthink the shit you two do together? Are you sleeping with him when I’m not around? Is that it?” “What? No! How could you even think that?! Nothing like that happened! We just danced and drank! We were tired and drunk so we didn’t realize where we fell asleep. I swear it, Eren, that’s all there is to it” you defend yourself with wide eyes, afraid you pushed your luck with just how friendly you are with your male friends.

Whatever happened, you’re sure neither Armin nor you would do something behind Eren’s back or ever really. It’s true that you and Armin are close but it’s not this kind of close. The alcohol probably just probably helped you loosen up to the point where you simply fell asleep right after dancing all night.

You see him look down at your exposed neck. It looks like he’s checking whether there are marks on the skin and when he sees none, he lets out a somewhat contented hum, almost as if that much proved you are telling the truth. An exhale leaves your throat as you think you managed to explain the situation to him.

That’s when he takes you by surprise as he starts pulling your arm again, throwing you on the bed before he climbs on top of you. His lips attack your neck with rough kisses immediately. The way he sucks on your sensitive flesh makes your breath hitch as you push against his shoulders, not completely understanding why he’s acting this way.

Only a growl can be heard when he catches your wrists, holding them in one hand above your head. There is a possessive spark to the way he looks down at your face and it sends shivers down your spine. You want him to always look at you like that - like he wants you so bad that he can’t hold back when you’re before him. “This is how I wanted to find you when I came home, you know? You in our bed, preferably needy for my touch after not having me here for the night or at the very least happy to see me,” he tells you as he licks the outer shell of your ear, making you squirm under him.

He’s mad, so very mad. You can hear it in the way he spits his words at you while he takes ownership over your body, reminding you who you belong to. And when a soft moan leaves your lips after he presses a kiss to your neck, he growls. Whether it’s because he’s angry or satisfied, you can’t tell.

“Instead, I find you in Armin’s arms and God, were you holding onto him for dear life. I almost lost it and punched him.” Eren sees red when you gasp at his confession. “What? Would it bother you if I punched someone who has no right having his hands on you?” His free hand holds your jaw as he looks in your eyes, looking for an answer. The grip is almost painful but he lets go when you look up at him, allowing you to reply. “You wouldn’t have been in the right, Eren. He- we didn’t do anything. He’s your best friend, you should know well enough he’d never do something like this. Or that I would never look at him that way. I only look at you.” You calm down your nerves, relaxing your body in his grip, no longer fighting against his touches. He’s obviously pleased with your compliance as he can finally let go of your wrists, which you keep above your head in submission.

Although still angry, the corners of his lips turn upwards when he sees how well-behaved you are for him. “So now you’re a good girl, huh? We’ll see how long you can keep up the act.” His words don’t even register in your brain as his lips start sucking on your collar bone, marking the delicate skin painfully. All you can do is moan and fight the urge to bring your hands down to touch him, knowing full well he wants you to restrain yourself.

His hands swiftly get rid of your dress, leaving you in your bra and panties before him. How he loves seeing you like this. Perfectly obedient, keeping your hands to yourself, looking at him with lidded eyes, ready to be ravaged. A perfect doll for him to please and use.

If only you hadn’t been so bad for letting Armin hold you. Only Eren should have you in his embrace, not anyone else. Now he has to make your cute little face be stained with tears, so that he knows you won’t ever let another man touch you like that. “Aren’t you a pretty thing? Tell me, darling, did you enjoy yourself last night?” His hand plays with the lace on your bra. Goosebumps raise all over your skin when he softly grazes your nipple through the soft material and you arch your back on instinct.

In the moment, you realize you don’t want to make Eren more angry than he is, so you utter a soft, “no.”

He pinches your erect nipple through the lace and hums. “So she lies as well. You’re a little vixen, aren’t you?” The intensity with which he stares into your eyes makes you think you might melt right in front of him. The excitement is increasing when you realize Eren will probably take you with this same exact energy. “I’m telling the truth. I missed you the entire time,” you somehow manage to moan out.

That much was true. Before you started drinking, all you could think about was Eren and how you couldn’t wait for him to get home in the morning. Just like him, you were surprised to wake up in Armin’s arms.

Your boyfriend pushes the fabric of your bra down without taking it off entirely. He kisses down your chest before taking one peak into his mouth suckin on it harshly. As much as it brings you pleasure, it still hurts and you find yourself calling for him. “Eren! That’s too much!” you tell him as you do your best to keep your hand above your head, grasping the pillow to prevent yourself from reaching for him although you desperately want to.

When he looks at you, he’s happy to see you still keep yourself restrained. He gives you an almost sinister smile, his eyes beaming in amusement. “I think you misunderstand. This is all for me,” to emphasise his point, he massages your breast with one hand and your waist with the other. “None of this is about you, darling. Maybe if you take it like a good girl, I’ll let you cum on my cock.”

The way he talks down to you has your insides clenching. You can already feel the wetness gather in your underwear. God, you want him to use you, to fuck thoughts of anyone else but him out of your brain even if there are no such thoughts to begin with.

When he sees your lust-lidded eyes he smirks and continues to abuse your nipple with his mouth. It doesn’t last long before he releases it with a wet pop, but you already whimper under him. The little empathy he has for you now makes him come back down to the abused flesh to give it a few gentle kitten licks in an attempt to soothe you.

He straightens his back to look down at your glistening skin, marked with his rough bites. Eren definitely isn’t an artist, but the way he painted the canvas of your body makes him feel like he just created a masterpiece.

The way your eyes gleam with tears which are just about to run down your cheeks is only the cherry on top. You really are a crybaby. The smallest of stimulations makes you weep for him and he loves every second of it.

Just as the stream of tears overflows, he brings his mouth down to lick the tears away. There is something about the way he does it so eagerly that makes you moan out while you rub your knees together to get some friction on your needy center.

Eren only chuckles at your reaction, sitting up. “You like that? Want me to make you cry some more?” You gasp when he pushes your legs apart only to slap your inner thigh with vigor. He can see the red mark on your skin forming as he softly caresses the spot with his palm before slapping it again, only a bit higher and closer to your center.

Each time he repeats the action, you arch your back. It hurts, but the pleasure it brings is just as intense. You don’t want to admit it, but having him so very near your dripping core makes his abuse even more enticing. The tears are now streaming down your face as you desperately call out his name in a plea. “Please, Eren!” Finally, you can’t restrain yourself and reach for his shoulders in a futile attempt to pull him closer so that you can kiss him.

He stops his hand on your thigh without moving an inch even as you so desperately hold onto him. “Did I tell you to touch me?” His tone is strict and irked, but you only pull him harder, this time actually managing to get his face in front of yours.

“I just want you so much, please Eren, take me, I beg you,” you say, breathless. He lets you bring him closer and so you kiss down his jaw and neck, all the while you hurriedly unbutton his shirt. You can hear his breath hitch when you suck on his skin softly in an attempt to convince him to give you what you want.

When you finally manage to get the shirt off of him, it’s as if he had woken from a trance that your touch put him under. He quickly grabs your wrists and pushes your body flat against the bed. The growls he lets out are almost animalistic. “You’ve got some nerve. Didn’t I tell you already? This is my fun, not yours. You’re acting like a needy whore right now.” He grunts in your face, his lips just above yours. You can see how much he wants you. His eyes look at you like they are just about ready to devour your entire being and with his body pressed closely against yours, you can feel how hard he is for you.

You can’t help yourself when you raise your hips to meet his, making the both of you moan out at the friction. “You needy bitch-”

“Yes, I am your needy whore so please-” you moan out, arching your back, “-please fuck me. I want you to use me, please Eren,” you whimper through the tears and he just can’t hold himself any longer.

He is mad again as he takes your lower lip and bites it before pushing his tongue in your mouth, dominating it. He wanted to have his fun with you, wanted to have you fall apart before him at least twice before he’d give you his cock, but the way you beg for him makes him weak. He has to have you now. The torture may come later, but right now, he wants to stick his hard prick in your wet hole.

“I will fuck you so rough you’ll beg me to stop, you little slut,” he tells you as he pushes your underwear down, revealing your glistering folds to him. Normally, he’d want to taste your mess, savor the flavor, but not this time. At least not when your eyes plead him to fuck you.

Instead he pushes his pants and boxers down as he undresses as quickly as he possibly can. You watch his hard member as he pumps himself a few times, looking at your inviting form before he climbs on top of you. His thick cock slides along your folds, wetting it in your juices and teasing your clit. Again, you push your hips upwards, tempting him to finally fuck you. He has to push on your abdomen down to keep you from further riling him up.

It only occurs to you that he hasn’t prepared you for his girth at all as he starts pushing inside. The stretch is so good though that it overshadows any uncomfortability. Only moans leave your mouth as he bottoms out, grunting. He lets you hold onto his shoulders this time and gives your lips a surprisingly gentle peck.

“I will fuck that attitude out of you.”

Not giving you a moment to respond he starts fucking into you at brutal pace, making you release a cry of pleasure. He hits that sensitive spot every time and you have to hold onto him for your dear life.

“So good,” you moan when he gives a particularly harsh thrust. He slows down the tempo at your comment and rather focuses on the force of his movements, giving it his all as he pushes into you with urgency. You start to meet his hips with yours, doing your best to move under him.

“Fuck, your tight cunt just takes me so well, doesn’t it, love?” Nodding your head in response, you try to tell him just how good this feels, but all that leaves your mouth are moans and cries of pleasure. You love the way he looks at you as he fucks into you, the way he stretches you so good and hits all the sensitive spots. He’s perfect for you.

He chuckles under his breath before pulling out abruptly.

Confused, you whine and try to bring him closer with your arms, but he only pushes them away.

“Get on your hands and knees. I’ll take you like a little slut you are.” Without having to tell you twice, you oblige and push your ass up in the air for him to see. He watches as your slick drips down and brings his finger up your inner thigh, gathering the wetness on the digit.

It feels like electricity going through you, especially when you turn your head around only to see him sucking on the finger. Noticing your prying eyes, he smirks and slaps your ass. “Look ahead, darling, or you’ll really make me snap.” You did as he said. Eren really planned to take you slowly, the fact that you cut his fun short with your pleading eyes makes him angry at himself for giving in so easily.

But with your gaze turned away, he can indulge himself to his heart's content. No stares of yours to egg him on to take you right away.

And so he uses his hands to spread your cheeks before he brings his mouth to your wet folds.

A surprised shriek escapes you when you feel his tongue lapping up at your center. He sucks on the opening before pushing in. Your mind is foggy, happy to have him in you at least like this.

The way you cry out his name in pleasure makes his prick throb and he has to pump himself with one hand as he eats you out. His other hand moves under you to flick your pulsing clit. All you can do is encourage him with your cries for more.

When he feels you clenching, he finally brings his mouth away with a wet pop. “W-wait, Eren! I need-”

You don’t even get to finish your words when he sticks his cock into your pulsing hole. It only takes one or two thrusts for you to come undone around him. With your arms giving up on you, your head falls onto the pillow as your boyfriend lets out a satisfied groan, fucking into you still.

“This is it. This is what I wanted. Shit, you feel so good. Cumming on my cock. You’re so good when you try to be nice for me.” The praise falls on deaf ears, all your mind can comprehend is the pleasure that comes with his rough thrusts.

The way you suck him in, pulsate around his length and cry his name, it all makes Eren go feral as he fucks into you with even more force than before. “E-Eren, I can’t- too much,” you huff in between his thrusts when the intensity becomes too much, overstimulating you.

“Fuck, one more time. You can do that for me.” It’s not a question and to make his point clear, he brings his hand under you and starts playing with your puffy clit again, immediately making you moan out. “That’s right, just like that,” he says when he feels your walls clench at his teasing.

You let him play with you as you do your best to hold in the cries. The pleasure is overwhelming. You can already tell you won’t last long. “Tell me, who do you belong to? Who makes you feel the best?” His tone is harsh, just like his thrusts. He needs to hear you say it, needs you to want him just like he wants you.

“You.” It comes out almost like a whisper as you swallow a moan to answer him but he won’t have it. He wants you to scream it out from the top of your lungs.

“Louder, darling,” he huffs and thrusts with ridiculous force, almost making you lose your balance and fall on your face

“You!” you call out loudly, but he still doesn’t seem satisfied. You clench around him when he pulls on your hair, bringing your back up against his chest as he kisses under your ear and bites.

“Call out my name.” All that leaves you is a moan, it’s too much. You’re too close and you know he is as well, still he growls and pulls on your hair one more time, making your insides pulse.

“You little whore, call for me or I swear to God I’ll leave you high and dry.” You know it’s probably an empty threat, he loves feeling you cum around him, but still, in your fucked out state you feel like your life depends on this.

“Eren!” You scream his name over and over again as he pushes into you and as he plays with your clit with more vigor, you come undone for the second time. The ecstasy fills you once again, maybe even harder than before as you lose control over your body entirely.

He lets your weak body fall to the pillow under you, while he still fucks you from behind, holding your hips up with his hands.

“You’re so good for me, fuck! A perfect little doll! Take it like a good girl!” His thrusts lose their rhythm as he finally reaches his peak, hot cum filling you up.

For a moment, only your heavy breathing fills the room, while he stays still inside you, waiting for the high to pass.

When it does, he pulls out, watching the cum seep out of your hole with a smile. He quickly picks napkins from the nightstand and cleans both of you before laying next to you and holding you close in his arms.

He kisses the top of your head with newly-found tenderness as you hug him back, finding comfort in the proximity.

“I love you so much, don’t ever make me watch someone else hold you like I do.”

Your heart clenches, it feels like he is just too scared you’d leave him if he didn’t constantly remind you of his love for you and so you snuggle up against him. “I love you too, Eren, so don’t doubt me. I want you to be the only person to hold me close.”

He’s satisfied with the answer and smiles down at your exhausted frame. ”I’ll go get us something to drink, okay?”

“Just don’t take too long.”

Eren nods, kissing you before he puts on some sweats,a hoodie and heads to the kitchen.

He’s surprised when he sees Jean, Armin and Ymir awake already, looking for something to eat in the fridge.

“Good morning,” he greets them as he walks closer.

Jean nudges at Ymir’s side with a smirk. “Oh, I bet you had the best morning, am I right?”

Eren just raises an eyebrow in question as he takes a bottle of orange juice from the fridge.

“Oh, don’t look so surprised,” Ymir grins at him. “You know, you should really learn to keep it down when you have people staying over! Not that I expected anything else with the way your girl was last night.”

At that Eren’s breath hitches, eyes getting a bit of a dangerous edge as they sway to look at Armin. No one seems to catch it though, save for Armin who awkwardly scratches the back of his neck.

“She really shouldn’t drink so much when you’re not around. She spent half of the night asking for you,” Armin explains, but Eren doesn’t seem too convinced, knowing the way you were clinging to the blond man in the morning. Jean starts laughing at the memory from last night. “Yeah, it got real bad when she started mistaking everyone for you. Like, I would get it if it was just me, but Armin is literally blond.”

Ymir chuckles as well. “Poor guy had to act like you so that she’d finally chill about you not being here, it was hilarious.”

“Oh,” is all that Eren manages to utter, suddenly feeling bad. You must have really overdone it with alcohol, it’s a miracle you’re not sick and yet you let Eren fuck you like there was no tomorrow. He feels like an idiot. “I gotta go,” he tells his friends as he runs back to your room.

“If you’re going for another round, keep it down this time, please!” Ymir yells after Eren, but that is the furthest from the truth she can get.

Eren spends the following few hours showering you with kisses and cuddles as he holds you close, whispering sweet ‘I love you’s in your ear. All he wants for you is to feel safe and happy with him by your side and so he gives you the best aftercare of your life. You don’t really understand where this energy comes from, but let him treat you like a queen nonetheless, loving the way he cares for you so earnestly.

#snk #snk x reader #snk smut #aot #aot smut #aot x reader #fem reader #attack on titan #attack on titan x reader #shingeki no kyojin #smut #eren smut #eren jeager x reader #eren x reader #oneshot #ao3 repost #eren yaeger #eren x y/n

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emeren · 3 years

Text

speed racer pt.2 - eren jaeger

pairing: eren jaeger x fem!reader

word count: 4.3 k

content warnings: 18+, smut, car sex, possessiveness, choking, dangerous driving idk LMAO

notes: it’s my birthday today! my gift to you all is speed racer pt. 2!!!! pt. 1 is not necessary to enjoy this oneshot, but may help with some context. here is that!

SUMMARY: eren takes the reader for a drive where he decides to clear some things up about their relationship in his own special way.

“it’ll be quick; i promise,” eren’s voice brought you from your daydream, head shifting against the cold window to look at him in the driver’s seat. his hair was up, brows furrowed in guilt as he waited for your response.

you let out a dramatic sigh, reaching to unbuckle your seatbelt. “fine, but i’m not going to wait in the car.”

“once it’s over i’ll buy you some food,” he rationed, unbuckling his seatbelt the same. you eyed him suspiciously, waiting for the inevitable sexual innuendo to leave his lips. “n’then i’ll take you back to mine and fuck you, just like you want.”

your unspoken agreement with eren had become routine at this point. after your mutually discovered attraction a couple weeks prior, the two of you had spent many a night in his bed, unashamedly basking in your sexual tension.

the concept of sex buddies hadn’t been one you’d previously dived into, and you would’ve been lying if you’d said you didn’t want to be exclusive. it only made matters worse that eren insisted on doing everything with you at this point, including dragging you to his board meetings for his sponsorship. he was a pain in the ass, but he was a pain in the ass that treated you like his girlfriend.

you wanted to make it official, but were too scared of embarrassing yourself, so you resorted to enjoying things the way they were. frienemies with benefits, as eren would say.

“c’mon, don’t be so vulgar,” you responded, slipping out of the car as eren snickered to himself quietly. you hated the fact that his comments made your face heat up. you were beginning to act like a schoolgirl around him, infatuated by your little crush.

“you know you love it,” eren smirked over the top of the car as he joined you, locking the vehicle. it was dark outside, the stadium brightly illuminated against the navy sky. “what was it you said again? ‘i want this just as much as you do’?”

you scowled, giving his arm a hard shove. he would not let you forget the things you’d said in the heat of the moment. “oh, fuck off.” you snipped.

eren laughed again, jokingly rubbing his arm as the two of you walked up to the stadium. it was around eight, the building being nearly vacant save for the members of eren’s sponsorship board inside.

“what’s the meeting about?” you asked as he held the door open for you, a gush of air conditioning making you shudder.

“if i’m being honest, i don’t know,” eren replied, his eyes settling past you. as you turned your head, you saw a group of exhausted looking men in worn grey suits talking quietly amongst themselves. they stopped whispering at the sound of the door opening; a short, balding man making his way over.

“mr. jaeger, thank you for coming on such short notice,” his voice was thick as he spoke, obviously a smoker. eren reached out to shake his hand, the man’s beady eyes settling on your face as he did so. “i’m sorry, but we won’t be allowing any unauthorized people in this meeting.”

startled, you looked to eren, whose face did all but curse at the short man. “do you mind waiting out here?”

“oh, yeah, no biggie,” you smiled reassuringly. he shot you a look of gratitude, mouthing the words “i’m sorry” as he walked off with the group. it was funny to watch him go; surrounded by serious men in suits while he wore jeans, a sweatshirt, and a pair of sneakers. not to mention he was about a foot taller than the rest of them.

a sigh escaped your lips as they disappeared around the corner. the building was ominous when you were alone; large and vacant, normally filled with people excitedly bustling to watch a race. without the energy, it was downright creepy.

you decided to stand against the wall while you waited, anxiously toying with the hem of your skirt and counting the number of fluorescent bulbs that flickered in the ceiling.

the distant rumble of talking suddenly hit your ears, head snapping in the direction of the sound. it was getting louder, obviously two people approaching. you readied yourself to launch into an explanation as to why you were sitting alone in the stadium, after hours, only to be pleasantly surprised at who rounded the corner.

“yo, what’re you doing here?” connie cried out in excitement, a smile splitting across his face. he was with jean, the two of them spattered with engine oil and dirt.

you grinned back, pushing yourself off the wall to meet them halfway. “eren had a sponsorship meeting and dragged me along. what about you guys?”

jean smirked at your response, sharing a look with connie that went unnoticed by you. “well, connie accidentally told the boss that we don’t know jack-shit about car mechanics, so now we have to go to a stupid workshop five days a week.”

“hey, it’s not my fault he was eavesdropping on our conversation with armin,” connie retorted, coming to stand beside you. you smiled at your friends, happy they were there. “we’ll wait with you, if you want?” he proposed.

“that’d be great,” you sighed. “eren said they’re usually only like thirty minutes long, so we won’t be here all night.”

“about that,” jean started, uncomfortably bringing a hand up to scratch the back of his neck. you frowned, wondering where he was going with this. “are you and him, like, y’know...”

you paused for a moment, deciding to play dumb. “huh?”

“are you and jaeger-meister dating?” connie interjected, wiggling his brows. despite knowing that this is where the conversation was going, you couldn’t help the wave of embarrassment that washed over you. you shifted uncomfortably in place, looking between your friends.

“i don’t know,” you answered honestly. “i can’t tell if he likes me or not. god, this is so high school.” you muttered.

jean gave you an apologetic smile, opening his mouth to speak before connie decided to give his own advice. “huh? why wouldn’t he like you? you’re a hot piece of ass!”

a laugh escaped your mouth at his idiocy, jean dishing him a scowl. “don’t listen to him. personally, i can’t see why you’d want to date that little shit.”

“yeah, it’s pretty embarrassing,” you replied demurely.

“well, if you like him that much, i say go for it,” connie shrugged. you eyed him warily, waiting for the ‘but’. the three of you stood in silence for a moment longer, considering what to say next.

“do you want my help?” jean asked apprehensively. he looked put-off by something, but you couldn’t tell exactly what. connie gave him an incredulous look.

“sure, i guess,” you responded. in some ways, you felt bad for jean. your friendship had been built off of a mutual distaste of eren, and now that you two were sleeping together, the playful mockery with jean had died down. he motioned his head back towards the wall, indicating that you and connie should follow.

“alright, here’s my plan,” he whispered dramatically. connie nodded his head, the two of you leaning in as if it were some grand escapade. “eren is a dumbass. in fact, i think he still has the brain of an ape.”

you rolled your eyes, suppressing a laugh as connie nodded once again in agreement. “get to the point, he’ll be out here any minute now.”

“alright, alright!” jean held his hands up defensively. “i genuinely don’t think he’s capable of intelligent thought. that being said, i believe the right way to gage his feelings are to activate his instincts.”

“dude, how long have you been planning this?” connie snorted. you couldn’t help but smile at just how funny the two of them were.

“never mind that,” jean shooed him back in annoyance. you raised your brow impatiently. “we need to make him jealous. if my assumptions are correct, it’ll piss him off and then you can tell him that he’s the only one you’re interested in.”

you pulled back from the huddle, unsure about his grand plan. “i dunno, jean. this sounds kinda stupid, if i’m being honest.”

“oh, c’mon,” jean begged, a devious smile on his features. “this’ll be our last chance to taunt him together.”

connie grinned as you contemplated it. “i think this is a great plan!”

you groaned, the small side of you that liked to make fun of eren starting to grow once again. “okay, fine. how’re we gonna do this?”

“leave that to me,” jean smirked. as if on cue, you could hear the bustle of the sponsorship men coming down the hallway. your tall friend was quick to step behind you, wrapping his arms around your torso and placing his chin on your shoulder, effectively pulling you to his chest. “follow my lead.” he whispered into your ear.

you couldn’t help the heat that rose to your cheeks at the action. jean was respectfully keeping a distance between your ass and his groin, but he was close enough that it wasn’t very obvious.

connie started to babble about a new korean barbecue restaurant that he and sasha were planning on going to, you rocking in jean’s arms to make the sight believable.

your heartbeat was drumming in your chest as eren rounded the corner, his professional smile plastered on his angular face. he was in the middle of talking with the balding man from earlier, eyes fixed on him. jean gave your waist a squeeze in reassurance.

eren’s gaze peeled from the short man, teal eyes landing on you and jean all cozy. it was as if a flip was switched; the professional smile he’d been wearing slid off his features with ease, face hardening.

you held his angry stare for a moment before turning to connie, laughing at whatever had been said, the feeling of jean’s breath against the shell of your ear as he let out a light chuckle. “it’s working.”

you heaved out a deep breath, focusing on connie instead of eren. you could feel his eyes practically burning holes in your head, shifting your neck so that yours fell back on jean’s opposite shoulder.

“alright, that should be it for tonight,” you heard one of the men say, glancing back over to them. you didn’t look for long though, quickly noticing that eren’s stare was intently focused on you and jean.

the men shuffled past the three of you, leaving the building. “hey, jaeger. we ran into y/n as we were leaving.” jean hummed against your shoulder.

you looked back at eren, who was standing in front of you with his eyebrows furrowed. jean must’ve been right, judging by eren’s face.

“we’re leaving.” eren deadpanned, taking a step forward. he wasn’t looking at jean, rather staring directly at you. you could feel a slight amount of guilt creep up your spine, jean sighing exceptionally loud as he pulled away from you.

“do you guys wanna come to the korean barbecue place with us? it’s gonna be real good,” connie asked innocently. eren didn’t look away from you, his jaw clenching.

“no. we’ve got other plans.” he said seriously, reaching forward to grab your hand and tug you the opposite way from the doors.

“woah, eren, you’re going the wrong way,” you huffed in confusion, trying not to trip as he yanked you away from your friends. he continued forward, not looking back.

“uh, bye i guess?” jean yelled. you looked over your shoulder to see the two of them giving you a thumbs up. you dished them an appreciative smile as you rounded the corner.

“eren, where are we going?”

eren stayed silent for a moment, not letting go of your wrist. “for a drive.”

“huh? but your car is in the lot out front?” you mumbled, absolutely dumbfounded. the tall man didn’t respond, large hand still wrapped around your wrist.

it wasn’t until you came to a familiar large door, eren giving it an unnecessarily hard shove. the lights flicked on, revealing ten shiny race cars, all perfectly lined up.

eren let go of your wrist, making his way over to his own car. it was a sleek black with white checker decals, much like the rest of the vehicles in the garage. you’d seen it before, as it was quite literally one of eren’s most prized possessions.

you stood in the doorway, eyeing him warily. “your race car? you never take it out on regular roads.”

eren’s jaw clenched as he unlocked the car, pieces of hair falling in his face. he looked upset, muscular arm propped on the roof and brows laced with annoyance.

he walked around to the other side, opening the passenger door for you. it was strange, seeing him dressed in his regular clothes next to his race car. something about the nonchalance was attractive, teal eyes looking at you expectantly. “c’mon. be a good girl and get in the car.”

at his choice of words you swallowed, inwardly cursing jean for his plan. you knew you were in for it, judging by the fact that eren only referred to you as good girl when he had his most sinful plans in mind. maybe you should’ve just talked to eren about making things official rather than making him jealous, you thought. too late now.

“okay,” you sighed, resolutely deciding to accept whatever fate it was that jean had painted for you. you crossed your arms, slowly approaching eren. you stopped right as you were about to slip into the car, looking up at him through your lashes. he stared down at you, eyes serious.

you slipped into the dark interior of the car without further discussion, the cold leather making you shiver as eren shut the door. you observed him through the windshield as he pressed a button to open the garage before getting in the car himself.

the smell of his cologne filled the car, your teeth nervously nibbling at the skin on the inside of your lip as he turned the vehicle on. you’d never been inside the car before, only seeing it on the track and in the garage when you came to pester your friends before a race.

it rode impossibly smooth, eren bringing his hand to the back of your seat as he backed out of the garage. you tried not to stare at the way his arm flexed, jawline enhanced as he strained his neck, but you couldn’t help yourself. he was just so hot.

eren must’ve felt your eyes, glancing down at you momentarily with an expressionless look. you quickly shifted in your seat to stare out the window, heat burning in your cheeks. god, why was this suddenly so awkward?

it was silent as he drove out of the arena, the dark city glittering against the sky. it was beautiful at night, skyscrapers lit up all pretty. you quickly found yourself distracted by the view, leaning your head against the cool glass. you were so consumed that you didn’t notice eren merging onto the freeway.

you were brought out of your trance at the feeling of his large hand resting on your upper thigh, grip tight and possessive. you glanced to him again, lifting your head from the window.

he was staring straight forward, foot slowly increasing the gas. you felt your chest tighten, seeing how he was riding the tail of a minivan in front of you.

“eren,” you warned, insinuating that he slow down. his index finger tapped tauntingly on your bare thigh, slowly rising up the skin. the fabric of your skirt rode up, eren weaving past the minivan with one hand on the wheel.

“i have a question for you,” he said lowly, eyes not leaving the road. you gulped, a strange mix of arousal and anxiety pitting itself in your stomach as his hand reached the apex of your thigh. the side of his pinky brushed against your pelvis. “hm, no underwear?”

you felt a pang of embarrassment. in your defense, you’d thought tonight was just going to be spent hooking up with the man, not going to the arena. “i, uh-”

“so, jean had his dick pressed against your ass and you didn’t have underwear on?” his voice was deep, jealously dripping from every word. your breath hitched as his middle and ring finger slid against your clit with ease, already soaking wet.

eren’s shoe pressed down on the gas again, the car zipping in and out between other vehicles on the freeway. his fingers rubbed against your clit slowly, your legs subconsciously spreading to give him better access. it felt so good, the way he was circling the nerves with desirable pressure.

“mmm, eren slow down, you’re going to crash the car,” you mumbled, watching as he sped up, whipping past the other vehicles. he was easily approaching 100 mph, your anxiety beginning to outweigh the pleasure. as if sensing this, eren sped up his fingers as well, a whimper leaving your mouth.

“i know it’s bad for me to be so jealous,” eren said flatly, his middle finger deviating from the ring finger to slowly insert itself into your tight cunt. he pumped it slowly, still not looking at you. he was pushing 110 at this point, doing so with ease. “but something about jean touching you. being so close to you like that.”

his ring finger joined the middle, the two sliding in and out of you, curling slightly. it was hard to stay focused on his reckless driving when he was fucking you with his fingers like that, your mind feeling fuzzy as a passing car laid on its horn.

“eren,” you breathed out in worry, his fingers hitting your sweet spot in order to make you shut up. “you gotta slo-”

an involuntary whimper left your lips as he curled his fingers particularly deep, the tingling sensation at your core beginning to build. you looked over to him, and boy what a mistake that was.

his one arm was flexed, hand gripping the wheel so tightly his knuckles were turning white. he was entirely focused on the road, eyebrows furrowed intently as his other hand purposefully increased its speed. he was so so hot.

you stifled another moan as your eyes looked forward again, the sight of eren nearly clipping a subaru outback making you sit forward.

“you’re going to crash!” you gasped.

“i’ll slow down if you answer my question,” eren growled, his thumb coming to rub your clit rapidly as his fingers continued to pump in and out of your cunt. you hissed at the newfound pleasure, your head coming back to rest against the seat.

“yes, yes, okay,” you agreed, screwing your eyes shut to avoid looking at how fast he was driving.

eren took a deep breath, giving you a sideways glance. he’d never done this before, but he’d also never felt this way about someone. the way you clenched so good around his fingers making his chest tighten. he made you feel this good, not jean. the thought brought a smirk to his face as you let out a strangled moan.

“i’ll stop speeding if you agree to be my girlfriend,” eren’s words shocked you right out of your pleasure coma, eyes widening as you jolted upright in your seat. did he really just say that? did jean’s plan actually work?

his hand jerked the steering wheel to the side, your mind too preoccupied with his statement to even notice his fingers had stilled inside of you, anxious for your answer. he wasn’t looking at you, eyes still locked on the road.

you held your breath as you noticed how fast your heart was beating. “i thought you’d never ask.” you responded, cheeks burning.

eren’s lips curled upwards, pulling his fingers from inside of you. your eyes followed his long digits as he popped the middle two into his mouth, sucking your bitter sheen from his knuckles. he was your boyfriend. he wanted you to be his girlfriend. “good girl.” he mumbled.

you glanced back at the freeway, surprised as eren jerked the steering wheel, making an abrupt exit. it appeared to deviate into the woods, your eyes flitting nervously to the man beside you. “um, where are you taking me?”

“i’m just fulfilling my promise,” he answered, bringing his hand back to grip your thigh. his fingers were wet with his saliva, the sight bringing a strong throb to your core. oh yeah, i never finished. “’member? i said once we were done with my meeting i was going to fuck you.”

you suppressed an excited smile at his vulgar words, pressing your thighs together for some form of relief. you were painfully aroused, the burning sensation almost too much to bear.

“plus, it seems like you never learn,” eren’s words were suddenly serious as he pulled the car up a gravel road. there was a sharp drop off to the side, the city skyline sparkling in the distance. you cocked a brow at him. “you’re my girlfriend now, but i’m still pissed about that stunt you pulled with jean. gonna have to punish you, of course.”

you swallowed as he shut the car off, the city sitting innocently in view. the spot between your legs was aching, desperate for some form of release. you couldn’t help the swell in your chest at the fact that eren was your boyfriend now, anxiously awaiting whatever he had in mind.

eren leaned over you, maintaining a deep stare as he shifted your seat into a flat position. his fingers lightly danced across your skin as he unbuckled your belt, face hovering above the hem of your skirt. he glanced back up to you, teal eyes glinting in the darkness.

“can’t wait to fuck my new girlfriend,” eren growled, wasting no time in climbing on top of you. he shifted your legs so that your knees were bent by your head, wet cunt on full display in front of him. he stared down at you, a hand on each knee. “shit, you’re so hot like this.”

he slowly brought a finger to your center, the feeling of his cold digit gliding against you bringing slight relief to the deep ache. his eyes were focused below your waist, lazily flitting upwards as he brought his finger to your lips. “taste.”

you happily accepted, wrapping your lips around his finger. your tongue swirled around his knuckle, the saccharin taste filling your mouth. he pulled it from your lips, a devilish grin on his features.

“i can’t wait any longer,” he breathed, leaning forward to press his lips against yours. the kiss was deep and heated, however it felt different from all the others you’d shared in the past. it was meaningful and tender, slow and deliberate. his tongue swiped your lip, slipping into your mouth with a sigh.

his hands undid his pants as you kissed, the sound of his belt being undone filling the small space. you could feel him positioning the tip of his cock at your entrance, sliding it against your slick.

eren pulled back to look at you, breaths mingled for a moment before he pushed past your entrance, burying himself deep within you. the stretch was slightly uncomfortable and you were convinced you’d never get accustomed to the sheer size of his dick.

eren didn’t wait for you to adjust, flexing his hips back to give you another purposeful thrust. a whimper slipped past your lips at the feeling, his hand leaving your leg and lightly wrapping around your neck.

“fuck,” he hissed, speeding up his pace. your walls clenched around him, climax fast approaching with every deep thrust of his cock within your cunt. “feels so good fucking you when you’re all mine.”

his hand tightened around your throat, the combined pressure at both ends of your body only adding to the pleasure as he rammed into you. he grunted as his other hand pressed your legs forward, getting a better angle so that he could fill you to the hilt.

a strangled cry ripped from your throat as he hit particularly deep, bringing his face down to roughly kiss your lips. he was breathing heavily, the car shaking as he bucked his hips into yours.

eren craned his neck down to look at where his length disappeared inside of you, a small smile toying at his features. the sight caused his cock to twitch, relishing in just how nicely he filled you up. you were his, and he was yours.

just the thought of you being his girlfriend was enough; a loud groan leaving his chest as he pressed his hips against yours. you could feel him release himself inside of you, the thick sensation bringing on a much anticipated orgasm. your limbs grew cold, the pleasure reaching the tips of your fingers.

eren placed a chaste kiss to your forehead, gazing down at you. “my girlfriend is so fucking hot.” he grinned.

you rolled your eyes at his cheesy comment, swatting his chest playfully. he carefully removed himself from you, trying not to drip onto the car seat.

“here, pretty. you’ll have to keep your legs up,” he instructed as he pulled his pants back up. you frowned, the thought of holding this position the whole way back somewhat daunting.

“huh? but how am i supposed to keep this stuff from coming out?” you whined, still trying to regain your composure. eren’s face was flushed as he smirked at you.

“that’ll be your punishment, m’kay?” he said smugly. you scoffed, holding your knees in each hand.

“but that’ll be impossible!”

“don’t worry,” he leaned forward to kiss your lips once again. “i’ll drive slow.”

<3 <3 <3

#eren jaeger #eren jeager #eren yeager #eren yaeger #eren jaeger smut #eren jaeger x reader #eren jeager smut #eren jeager x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager smut #eren yaeger smut #eren yaeger x reader #eren jäger #eren x reader #eren smut #emmy writes #🦧

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biggest-stupidhead · 3 years

Text

Bad Timing (Levi x Reader) Part 5

Summary: How do you tell your friends that you’re falling for your big brother’s best friend?

Work Count: 6.3K

You were angry. Of course Levi had to go and stir the pot right before the holiday season. The time of year when he spent the most of his hours at your home. Even though he spent most of his time at your house throughout the whole year, this amount of time typically doubled through the months of October through December. The remaining weeks in October were the worst. You both expertly avoided one another, Petra and Levi continued to see each other exclusively. This turned out to be bittersweet for you, the pros were that Levi was busy trying to please Petra to spend too much time at your house. But also it stung to see him with her, even though you had no right to feel jealous.

The two weeks after your kiss, you spent holed up in your room, your phone set on do not disturb. After binging Gossip Girls and all of the classic Disney movies, you finally decided that instead of focusing on romance, you would devote yourself to school. Thankfully you weren't the only person that favored school over social gatherings, you found yourself spending countless hours in the school's musty library with Armin. He was so easy to get along with, down to earth, kind, and most importantly, he was too shy to ask you about anything too personal. Today was one of those days, it was nearing the end of November, the trees had shed their leaves, bearing the naked bark. And the weather was constantly changing. Some days it would snow, others it would pour rain, but that was just the midwest for you. Glancing up from the textbook that had held your attention for the past two hours, your were pleased to see a flurry of fat snowflakes spiraling downwards. The window had frost creeping up from the corners, thank God, maybe the weather would finally settle and allow the snow to stick for once. You could feel Armin staring at you, his eyes piercing the back of your skull. a feeling you had become familiar with. Turning back to face him, he averted his eyes, a comforting pink creeping onto his cheeks with the embarrassment of being caught.

"It's really coming down huh?" you tried to initiate some light small talk.

"Yeah! Hopefully it will stick." Armin responded, a nervous chuckle slipping past his lips as he returned his attention back to his homework. You hummed, glancing back down at the yellowing pages of the old history textbook, a frown marring your features.

"What's wrong? Need some help?" Armin asked, standing up from his seat and coming to stand behind you.

"Oh, well I guess I'm just confused about this law." you pulled the response from your ass. Of course you understood Roe v. Wade, you just didn't want to tell Armin that you were ready to leave. He always made this face that reminded you of a puppy that just got drop kicked.

"Roe v. Wade huh? I can help you with that no problem!" his baby blue eyes lit up, he pulled the nearest chair up to the table, the legs loudly scratching against the rickety library floors.

"Great, thanks!" you tried to sound excited, and you tried even harder to focus on Armin's summary of Roe v. Wade.

"Easy right?" Armin chirped, his finger hovering over the paragraph that explained the law.

"You're right, I think that I just need a break. My brain feels fried." you moaned, folding your arms across the desk and burying your head in your arms.

"Likewise." Armin agreed, dragging his chair closer to yours not very subtly.

"Want to go grab a coffee?" you asked, barely lifting your head to glance at him.

"Sure." he beamed, his innocent face completely lighting up. Your library had a small coffee shop nestled in the back, the cafe was run by students who had free periods. Granted the coffee wasn't the best, but it still did the job. You thanked the girl behind the counter as she passed you your steaming cup of dark liquid. Armin was rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet as he waited for his order, you busied yourself with mixing in sugar and some creamer. Finally the barista gave Armin his latte and the two of you meandered back to your corner. You slowly began packing your things, hoping that Armin would get the hint and you would be able to escape the stuffy library. Armin noticed, you closed the book with a sigh and began stuffing pens and other writing utensils into your small pencil case.

"Ready to call it a day?" Armin asked his lips hovering over the steaming hot coffee.

"Yeah, I told Hange that I would be ready to leave by the time she finished with Science Olympiad." you sighed, gathering the assortment of books that you had pulled from the shelves getting up to return them to their rightful places.

"Oh gotcha, same time Thursday?" He asked hopefully, his light blue eyes meeting yours. You clicked your tongue and grimaced, shooting him an apologetic look.

"Ah I would but my mom has Thursday off so I was going to have dinner with her." you explained, watching Armin get that kicked puppy look, that look always had a way of making your heart hurt.

"Aw well have fun!" he waved you off, the sad look on his face replaced with a small forced smile.

"Thanks Armin, I'll see you in Chem tomorrow." you smiled sweetly at him as you turned to leave.

"Bye!" he waved goodbye to you as you pulled the large door open and slipped out. Sparing a glance at your watch you sighed, Hange should be done in the next 5 minutes. But knowing her she would take another 20 minutes to wrap up her Science Olympiad meeting. So you leisurely strolled down the empty stone corridor, your eyes trained on the large windows that lined the hallway and overlooked the courtyard. The library was on the second floor, which gave you a perfect view of the school grounds. The snow seemed to be falling faster now, the flakes were beginning to stick to the blades of grass, giving the lawn a patchy appearance. Hopefully Hange had remembered her snow scraper, surely the car would have a coating of frost on the windows by now. It would not be the first time that the two of you had to scrape ice from her windows using your credit cards or your school ids.

You turned your attention back to the stony corridor, you had almost reached the stairs. You began your descent, a hand loosely gliding down the cold stone banister. Your mind drifted to thoughts of what Erwin's plans were for this evening, did he plan to eat dinner with you? Or would he run off with Hange as he had been doing for the past week or so? You had noticed that the pair had been spending more time alone as of late, and you couldn't blame them. Erwin was already committed to Notre Dame, a prestigious school known for football and extraordinary academics. Hange had recently been accepted into Princeton, one of the eight ivy league schools, and she was ecstatic. This however means that they will attending schools in different states. You knew that they planned to continue dating despite the distance, personally you were a tad skeptical of long distance relationships, but you knew that they were both mature enough to continue seeing each other.

You paused on the landing between floors, the sound of laughter was echoing off the stoney walls.

"That was a dirty move Kirstein!" you recognized Eren's agitated voice, which was closely followed by the hearty laughter of Conny and Marco.

"Pay closer attention next time Jeager." Jean teased, a smile spread across your lips at the sound of your friends. Their presence motivated you to jog down the remaining stairs and turn the corner. Just at you poked your head around the corner your eyes landed on the group of boys walking towards you.

"Oi (Y/n)! Where's Armin?" Eren called out to you first and you waved.

"Still in the library." you jabbed your thumb back towards the stairs behind you.

"Classic." Conny sniggered as he adjusted his duffle bag on his shoulder. You pursed your lips as you took in their uniforms. They wore soccer jerseys and shorts, a matching set of forest green, the school crest, a pair of wings one blue and one white, rested above their left breast over their hearts.

"Indoor soccer?" you asked, nodding towards the ball tucked under Marco's arm. The boy nodded and tossed you the ball.

"Season just started." he stated proudly, you easily caught the ball and smiled at him. Marco was your age, but you didn't usually spend time with him outside of school. The two of you had grown close the year prior when you had been in the same gym class, but since then you hadn't spoken very much.

"How exciting." you murmured as you gripped the ball in your hands. The boys nodded and you tossed the ball back to Marco.

"What are you doing here so late?" Jean asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Studying for the Government test with Armin." you shrugged, tucking your hands in your pockets. Things had been tense in your friend group since you and Jean had began casually seeing one another. The two of you had gone out on a handful of dates over the past month, all of them enjoyable. But you knew you didn't want a full blown relationship, something you still needed to tell Jean.

"Ah gotcha. So will you be coming to Sasha's friendsgiving party this weekend?" Jean inquired, his eyes shined with a glint of hope.

"Oh, I almost forgot about that! Yeah I'll be there." you smiled, a rush of excitement running through you when you remembered the invitation you had received earlier this week.

"What are you bringing?" Conny butted in, licking his lips. You hummed thoughtfully, what would you bring?

"Maybe macaroni and cheese? Or a pie?" You thought aloud as you lifted a hand to cup your chin. Conny groaned and grabbed your shoulder.

"Pie, please for the love of God bring your pie." he begged, his hand squeezing your shoulder. You giggled at this eagerness, and nodded. Pies were easy enough to bake, and if that's what people wanted then you would be more than happy to deliver.

"Thank you thank you thank you-" Conny shook you as he thanked you profusely, Eren snarled and tugged the two of you apart, while Marco and Jean laughed.

"Knock it off baldy." he hissed as he tossed Conny back. You chuckled and waved your hands dismissively.

"I'd better go, Hange should be done soon." you sighed, your eyes straying to the nearest window, you gasped. The snow was coming down in thick swirls, the sun had dipped below the horizon, making it difficult to see much through the snow.

"Oh wow, that's a lot of snow!" Marco exclaimed as he turned to follow your gaze. Jean let out a low whistle, Conny squealed excitedly.

"Yeah I better get going." you called over your shoulder as you made a break for the west wing, which was where the senior parking lot was located. The halls were dark, you only crossed paths with one janitor who didn't even glance up at you. You paused at the door at the end of the hallway and squinted out into the blizzard. The parking lot was dark, a clear indicator that Hange had not arrived to warm up the car before you.

"Ah there you are, perfect timing!" Hange's booming voice startled you as it echoed through the empty hall.

"Oh Hange, thank God, please tell me you have your scraper." you fretted, Hange grimaced, giving you an apologetic smile.

"Yeah about that..." she muttered, her hand rubbing the back of her neck. You groaned and reached into your backpack for your wallet. You fished out your drivers license and your credit card and turned back to the snowy parking lot.

"Better get started then." you grumbled, Hange laughed anxiously and moved to open the door for the both of you.

"Right."

___

You flexed your raw fingers by the vents as they blasted hot air into the cabin of the car. Hange was rubbing her hands together furiously and blowing hot air on her own frigid fingers.

"For the love of God, just keep the scraper in the car year round." you moaned as you slid your id back into your wallet.

"Might be a good idea actually." Hange stuttered between the chattering of her teeth. You huffed, tucking your hands underneath your thighs in an attempt to regain the feeling in your hands. Hange shifted the gear to drive and slowly pulled the car out of the parking lot, the wipers squeaking against the glass as they swiped the relentless snow off of the windshield.

"So, what do you want for dinner kiddo?" she gushed, her coppery eyes glinting mischievously.

"I dunno, something hot." you jabbed back, shifting on your hands.

"Whole gangs going to be there!" Hange prodded, clearly attempting to get a reaction from you.

"Great, who's cooking?" you taunted, shooting her a smile to show that you meant well.

"Oh well I guess Nanaba could." Hange mused, pleased with your good natured jabs.

"Great I'm starving." you leaned back and closed your eyes. Hange chuckled and turned her eyes back to the dark road ahead.

The drive took longer than usual due to the heavy snowfall. The roads were slick with the fresh snow, which stuck stubbornly to the road due to the lack of traffic on the country roads. But you made it to your house without a hitch. Erwin's minivan was already covered in a layer of snow, and Levi's BMW was untouched, Mike and Nanaba had not yet arrived. Hange parked and the two of you quickly gathered your belongings and walked briskly to the front door. You kicked your feet on the mat before entering, the foyer already a bit wet due to snow being tracked in on shoes. You peeled off your shoes with Hange and carried your things upstairs, Hange following close behind. Hange slipped into Erwin's room while you dropped your bag in your own room. You hadn't seen your brother or his short friend yet which was odd, they usually hung out in the kitchen. You met Hange back in the hall, her glasses, which had fogged up when you had entered the house were perched atop of her auburn hair.

"Where are they?" you asked bluntly as you watched her scrub the spectacles with the hem of her sweater.

"Beats me, let's go make some soup or something." Hange shrugged, holding her glasses up to the light to inspect the lenses. So you jogged down the stairs and began pawing through the pantry through the abundance of canned goods. You frowned at the cream of mushroom soup and set it back into the pile before refocusing.

"Heyyy now we're talking!" Hange crooned, you turned to see her pulling out a frozen pizza from the depths of your freezer. You scoffed before turning back to the pantry, a frown settling on your features.

"How about tomato soup and grilled cheese?" you offered as you pulled out two cans of tomato soup and a loaf of bread. Hange shrugged and tossed the pizza back into the freezer, she then opened the fridge and pulled out an assortment of cheese. The two of you fell into your effortless rhythm Hange stirred the soup while you began to cook the sandwiches. Finally the front door banged open, Levi's combat boots squeaking as he walked into the house, he haphazardly kicked off the shoes and stalked into the kitchen and straight into the living room. You raised your eyebrows in surprise as you watched him walk through the house, his arms full with kindling. Erwin followed closely behind, his arms also full of firewood. So that's where the pair had been. Hange fawned over them, greeting Erwin by dusting off bits of bark from his coat before turning to pat Levi's head. Levi swatted her sticky hands off of his head and glared at her menacingly.

"Hands off four eyes." Levi hissed, he ducked expertly underneath her arm and fled to the kitchen where you were flipping a grilled cheese. Erwin and Hange began the chore of lighting the fire while you took on the task of cooking as per usual. Levi frowned at the sight of the damp foyer and turned on his heel to grab the mop. You smiled at the sight of him mopping the floor despite the fact that people were still on their way and it would only end up messy again. Sure enough, just as Levi tossed the dirty water out of the front door and tucked the mop back in the closet, Mike and Nanaba strutted in, arms full of assorted baked goods and board games.

"Hey everybody! Hope we didn't miss anything!" Nanaba trilled as she tracked more snow into the front room. Levi heaved a sigh as he turned to grab the mop, you chuckled and took the container of cookies from her arms so she could take off her jacket. Mike nodded at you as he strolled into the living room where Hange and Erwin were still fumbling to light the fire wood.

"No, we actually only just got home about thirty minutes ago." you assured the blonde as she joined you in the kitchen. She smiled as she watched Mike kneel down to join Erwin and Hange as they blew on the small embers.

"What games did you guys bring?" you attempted to make small talk as you turned back to the task at hand.

"Oh the usuals, Sequence, Candy Land, Clue, etcetera." she waved a hand dismissively as she turned to stir the soup.

"Sounds fun!" you exclaimed as you tossed another sandwich on the plate. Nanaba hummed in response as she smiled stupidly into the soup. You pursed your lips and cocked your head as you studied her.

"Not to be that person but...Have you picked a school yet?" you asked with a small chuckle. She nodded,

"Yeah actually, just picked two days ago!" she beamed, turning to face you once more.

"Wow really?"

"Yeah! I'm going to attend Michigan State University with Mike!" she gushed as she set the spoon off to the side with a clang.

"That's great! Michigan is beautiful, and that's an awesome school." you matched her excitement and dumped the final sandwich on the plate and switched the stove off.

"Thanks! We're super excited." her words were so sweet and filled with love it made you feel sick. You nodded and turned to grab plates and bowls for everyone. Nanaba and Mike had only started dating about a month prior, in fact they had admitted their affections to one another back in October at your house. In a way you envied their effortless relationship, despite only dating for a month they made a great pair. You served yourself and moved to sit at the island in the kitchen. A cheer from the living room told you that the trio had finally ignited the fire, shortly after they piled into the kitchen and began to dish food onto their plates. Levi once again stuffed the mop and bucket back into the closet and feverishly washed his hands before serving himself. As he reached for a grilled cheese the sleeve of his hoodie scrunched up, revealing a new tattoo on his left wrist. Your jaw dropped momentarily, the sight of the fresh ink shocking you. In fact it was so fresh that the skin around the ink was still red and a bit swollen, glistening with the salve. He rounded the island and dropped into the stool to your left, and your eyes went straight to his wrist.

"Fresh ink?" you asked, propping your chin on the heel of your hand as you watched him bring the spoon to his mouth.

"Yeah." he replied, not bothering to elaborate.

"Can I see?" you pressed, Levi shot you a glare as he bit into his sandwich but still lifted his hand for you to pull his sleeve up. You gingerly tugged his sleeve up and a tiny 'awe' escaped your lips. The drawing was extremely minimalistic, the delicate black ink contrasting beautifully with his pale skin tone. It was a small tea cup, with a chip in its rim. Levi scoffed and tugged his arm back.

"That's a good one Levi." you gushed as you turned back to your own meal.

"Thanks." he grumbled as he looked everywhere but your face.

"Where do you get them done?" you asked before taking a huge bite of your sandwich.

"WitchHammer." he grunted, his patience growing thin. All of these questions reminded him of a particular brunette. You hummed in response as you entertained the idea of getting a tattoo for your 16th birthday that was coming up in the next couple of months. You already had an appointment at the shop to get your forward helix pierced on your left ear. The others were getting rowdy on the other side of the island, too engrossed in their conversation to notice the side conversation Levi and you were engaging in.

"Did it hurt?" you quizzed feeling a bit playful. You had missed Levi's bluntness and his shitty sense of humor.

"I would be lying if I said no." he retorted, his sharp eyes catching yours for the first time in weeks. You chuckled and nodded as you chewed your food.

"You think that I would look good with a couple tattoos?" you giggled, smiling broadly at the raven haired boy. He clicked his tongue and turned to take you in, his eyes raking over your form. Finally his eyes settled on your hands, his brows pinched together in thought as he stared.

"Personally...I like minimalistic designs, you could probably pull off some finger tats or hand tats." he mused, you glanced at your hands, interesting. You held your hands up to the light to get a better look and began to think of some small designs that you might be interested in.

"Tattoos are a big commitment, don't just get some stupid shit." Levi lectured as he lifted his cup of tea to his lips, you frowned he was one to talk.

"I know." you decided that tonight wasn't the time to argue with him, especially since this was the first time spending time together in weeks. He nodded but kept a skeptical eye on you as you folded your hands onto your lap and turned to listen to the other conversation. You frowned when you realized they were just talking about prom, awkward. So you decided to clean up, the exhaustion of the long day seemed to hit you like a truck and all you could think about was your bed and all of the work that was due on Sunday. You washed up quickly and waved weakly before trudging up the stairs, thankfully the others didn't seem to care that you were calling it a night early. You changed into a pair of flannel pjs and an old ACDC shirt that had seen better days. You sank into your old desk chair and flicked on the small lamp, you rummaged through your back pack and pulled out your laptop and a notebook. Sparing a glance at the small alarm clock you groaned, it was already well past nine o'clock.

You decided to pick up from where you had left off with your Government notes. Your handwriting started off neat, the ink gliding flawlessly across the lined paper. But by the time you had finished the notes and moved on to your chemistry homework, your handwriting had become rocky at best. You frowned at the smudged ink, the green hue bleeding into the once white paper. With a sigh you reached for your white out and continued to write out the reaction. Once you were finished with Chem, you turned your attention to your research paper for English. As you typed you could feel your eyelids drooping, the words seemed to blur and bend across the computer screen. Closing your eyes for a moment wouldn't hurt would it? A defeated sigh breezed past your lips as you folded your arms across the desk and rested your forehead against your arms to block out the blinding light of your lamp. You yawned and rubbed your eyes in an attempt to wake yourself up, though this seemed to be unsuccessful. As you slipped into sleep, you recalled the last time you had fallen asleep at your desk and how fucked up your back felt the following week. But your exhaustion won and your head slumped against your desk, any pain you felt would be a problem for future you.

Meanwhile, downstairs the upperclassman were well into their third bottle of wine and their fifth round of Candy Land. Erwin flicked the spinner and moved his piece accordingly, Levi sat back and sipped the dry red wine, Mike had his hand thrown over Nanaba's shoulders casually. Hange was leaning her head heavily against Erwin's shoulder and Levi swore he had never felt like such a loser in his whole life. If you were down here at least he wouldn't be the only person down here that was single. Hange howled as Erwin pushed his piece past hers, always the sore looser. Nanaba giggled drunkenly as she choked on her glass of wine. Levi rolled his eyes, his friends were past tipsy now, but not quite drunk, and this was usually when Levi would leave. He hated dealing with drunk people, they were messy and loud, the mere thought of any of them vomiting made him cringe. He waited until the spinner came around to him before he excused himself.

"Count me out." he held up his hand to deny the spinner as Mike tried to hand it to him.

"Awe come on Levi! We can't let Erwin win for the fifth time in a row!" Mike begged as Levi stood up and picked up his glass of wine.

"No." Levi denied, his voice growing colder. The group collectively called for him to stay, their voices a bit unsteady due to the alcohol. Levi shrugged them off and carefully stepped over Hange, she snagged his ankle and held him in a vice grip.

"No, don't go Levi! Finish this game please!" she whimpered as she pressed her face into his calf. His nose wrinkled in disgust at the sudden contact, Erwin chuckled and pulled Hange back and pressed a kiss to her temple. Yeah it was definitely time for him to go to bed, besides he needed to put some vaseline on his fresh ink. He slid into the upstairs bathroom, the sound of his friends laughing fading into the background. Tugging up his sleeve his hissed at the feeling of the raw skin coming in contact with the cold air. He pawed through the drawers, pausing at the sight of your feminine hygiene products. He usually used the downstairs restroom since the guest room was in the basement. He slammed the drawer shut and moved onto the next one, a relieved sigh escaping his lips at the sight of the familiar jar of vaseline. He swiped the jelly onto his tiny tea cup tattoo and rolled his sleeve back down, the soothing jelly immediately calming the irritated skin.

On his way out of the bathroom he noticed the small sliver of light that shined through your cracked door. He glanced down at his wrist watch and frowned, it was one thirty in the morning, you had supposedly gone to bed hours ago. He glanced down the stairs, from the bathroom he could see the open floor layout of the living room, where all of his friends were still gathered. He steeled himself and padded up to your door, he lifted his hand and rapped the backs of his knuckles against the surface. He frowned when there was no response, he gently pushed the door open and tentatively stepped inside. The room was dimly lit, the only light emitting from the small lamp on your desk. His eyes softened at the sight of you slumped onto your desk, but quickly hardened at the sight of drool dripping from the corner of your mouth. He sat his wine glass down as quietly as he could on your nightstand and raked his eyes around your cluttered room in search for a blanket. He spotted a quilt neatly folded on your window seat, he unfolded the blanket and draped it over your shoulders. Just as the blanket was settling on your shoulders and he was pulling his hands back, the door flew open. He jumped, spinning around only to be met with the sight of an unsteady Hange. The brunette's eyes widened at the sight of Levi's hand on the back of your seat.

"What..." her eyes narrowed and she pointed between the two of you.

"Is this?" she finished as she stepped into the room, her body swaying unsteadily. Good question, what was he doing in here?

"I came to shut off her light." Levi lied through his teeth, the truth was that he had wanted to spend more time in your presence.

"Lies." Hange hissed as she pointed accusingly at him.

"Tch, believe what you want four eyes." Levi grunted as he stalked across the room, meaning to make a quick get away before she drew too much attention to this fishy situation.

"Hey don't-" she lunged in an attempt to keep Levi from escaping, spilling her glass of wine onto the white carpet and onto Levi's crisp white hoodie. She caught herself on Levi, a drunk giggle bubbling past her lips as she clung to him. Levi staggered under her weight, his back hitting your wall with a dull thud. You grunted, slowly lifting your head from the desk you turned around to see Levi seething under Hange's weight as she pressed against him. Your eyes widened at the sight, Levi was trying to grab the glass from her hand to prevent further spillage, you were so distracted by the rare sight of Levi and Hange in such close proximity that you didn't notice the quilt falling off your shoulders. You blinked dumbly at the two of them as they grappled for the wine glass, Levi ultimately winning due to Hange's drunken state.

"Levi was peeping on you while you slept." Hange blurted, Levi slammed his hand over her mouth and snarled. You weren't surprised when Levis pulled his hand back with a small gasp, you could just make out the sheen of what you assumed was Hange's drool over his palm. The brunette cackled and staggered away from him and out of the room.

"I'm going to tell Erwin." she sang as she stumbled through the hall with her hand on the wall to guide her.

"Hange don't, it's okay really." you called after her, but your words fell on deaf ears as she rounded the stairs and disappeared.

"Damn it." Levi hissed, his eyes trained on the stain on the ground, he pulled the sweat shirt off of his skin, the alcohol sticking to his skin. You cleared your throat awkwardly as Levi pulled the sweatshirt off. You glanced at the stairs, no sign of Hange and Erwin yet, you could hear the sound of the group stumbling around the kitchen. Hopefully Hange had forgotten and favored grabbing another drink over causing trouble, so you stood up and crossed your room to quietly shut the door. Levi had his head against the wall, his eyes closed expecting an onslaught of accusations. Instead he was surprised to see you digging through your closet, pulling out one of your larger sweatshirts you tossed it to him. He caught the garment and eyed is suspiciously before tugging it over his head.

"Thanks." he mumbled, you waved him off and crossed your room to sit down on your bed.

"What's up?" you questioned, it was certainly out of character for him to be in your room. Levi shrugged and slowly crossed the room to drop down onto your bed next to you.

"Your light was on and I came in to shut it off." Levi replied nonchalantly, his eyes dull as he watched you slip under your covers. A chill ran up your spine, your room always got cold in the winter due to the large windows. After a moment of awkward silence you patted the space beside you, Levi quirked a brow at you but when you smiled at him he slid closer to you. He settled against the headboard with a sigh, you looked up at him, taking in the sharp lines of his jaw and the way his Adam's apple bobbed when he swallowed. He turned and raised a brow skeptically at you, you giggled and turned to slip deeper under your covers. He scoffed but turned to face you, propping himself up on his elbow. From this close proximity you could smell the wine on his breath, you noticed that his pupils were dilated, and his cheeks flushed.

"Thanks...I guess." you muttered as you watched him reach into his pockets and pull out his juul and take a hit. You frowned as he turned his head away from you to exhale, he sighed contentedly and turned to face you once more.

"You're going to get me in trouble." you scoffed as he attempted to offer you the juul.

"You only live once." he smirked as he dangled the device in your face. You gently pushed his hand away from your face, he shrugged and took another drag.

"Are you sleeping over?" you questioned, he simply nodded and pocketed his juul.

"It's like three in the morning." he scoffed rolling his eyes in annoyance.

"Oh, I guess..." you trailed off, the house had grown quiet, hopefully Hange had been dragged to bed by Erwin and had long forgotten about snitching on Levi. You weren't sure what Levi was still doing in your bed, you knew that he wouldn't force himself on you, but still he had never spend this much time alone with you since the time you had kissed. Just as you were about to ask him why he was still in your room, you heard the sound of the front door opening and then quickly closing. Your mother was home, you shoved Levi's shoulder and motioned for him to get out of your bed, a surge of panic rushing through you. Your mom would kill you if she saw Levi in your bed this late. Levi grunted and rolled off the bed, landing heavily on the ground with a thud. You winced and pointed at the door, Levi opened his mouth to say something but ultimately turned and stalked towards the door. When he opened the door, he was met with the tired face of your mother. Her eyes widened at the unexpected sight of Levi.

"Oh, Levi.." she managed to keep her voice even as she took in his appearance, his hair a bit mussed, cheeks pink and wearing your clothes.

"It's not what it looks like mom!" you scrambled out of bed and pushed Levi away from the doorway so that you could address your mother.

"Really..." she narrowed her eyes skeptically as her eyes roamed over your pajamas and messy hair. You grimaced but nodded, she glared at you and heaved a heavy sigh, turning her attention to Levi.

"So your uncle told me that you wouldn't be coming to Christmas this year?" she swiftly changed the subject. Levi blinked, shocked that she had chosen to ignore the suspicious state she had found the two of you in.

"Y-Yeah that's true, I finally saved enough to visit my old friends in France for the holidays." he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Is that so?" she hummed, leaning against the door frame and tugging her light jacket closer to her body. Levi nodded and spared you a glance, you looked surprised, but not upset.

"Well that sounds amazing, you'll have to send us a postcard." she mused, Levi nodded and shifted awkwardly.

"Yes ma'm." he responded, your mother nodded pleased with his response.

"How long will you be gone for?" she probed.

"Until January 8th." Levi answered.

"That's a long time." you quipped, Levi glanced at you and nodded.

"How exciting." your mother's response was genuine, she stepped aside allowing him to pass.

"Yeah." he muttered as he slid past and made his way towards the stairs. Once he was out of sight your mother turned to you, her usually soft features pinching into a scowl.

"Explain." she snapped, pointing a finger at the sizable wine stain.

"Hange spilled it, I'll clean it in the morning." you sighed as you eyed the large purple spot.

"Alright, just make sure that it gets cleaned." your mother leaned forward and kissed your forehead. You smiled at her, it was unusual that you got to see her after her shift.

"How was work?" you asked as you eyed her scrubs, noting a mystery stain on her shirt.

"Messy." she sighed as she followed your gaze.

"Did you save lots of lives?" you giggled.

"Of course." your mother jabbed.

"Get some sleep (Y/n)." she hummed, her hand burying into your messy hair to ruffle it affectionately.

"Goodnight mom." you called after her as she descended the staircase, she waved her hand and you slowly shut the door.

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mandoalorian · 3 years

Text

Pain Is For The Living [Javier Peña x F!Reader] - Chapter 3

Summary: Sex work in the heat of 1980’s Colombia was never going to be a walk in the park. Especially not when you had a crush on your number one client, agent Javier Peña. You’d been warned about him and his reputation, but after one very specific incident that would change your life forever, you find yourself attached to him like never before and you’d do anything to make him yours. Even if it means endangering your own life.

Rating: 18+

Warnings: Javier being kind of an asshole, allusions to sex, a ~moment~ in the bathtub, mention of PTSD and trauma, food mention, drink mention, ...feelings?

Word count: 4200

Author’s Note: It’s been so long! I’m sorry. It’s been pretty hectic and I’ve been doing my best to wrap up my other series’ and complete requests. I appreciate you all for sticking around and asking for updates on this chapter. I’ve mentioned it a few times, but PIFTL is very difficult to write. It deals with very sensitive issues and so not only can it be mentally draining to write, it takes a lot of time to research and edit. I won’t give up on this series though. I adore this story and can’t wait to share it all with you.

Pain Is For The Living Masterlist

* Reblogs appreciated and my ko-fi is linked in my bio if you wish to support my writing!

Nina pushed off Javi quicker than a bullet leaving a gun, grabbing a blanket from her bed and wrapping it around her naked body. “What the fuck Javier?” she spat.

Jesus Christ -- Javier had never made that mistake before. Moaning someone else’s name? He was better than that. It took him a moment to just process what happened, Nina’s yelling and accusations only a blur in the background. “Who is she, Javier?” Nina questioned, her tone venomous. That was enough to snap the agent out of his thoughts. Her cold eyes burned like wildfire as she glared at him. “Who. Is. She?”

“Uh…” Javier racked his brains to try and figure out a way he’d be able to save this situation. But the longer he took to answer Nina’s question, the more infuriated she got. “Informant.”

That wasn’t exactly a lie. You’d agreed to help him. But whether or not you’d actually be able to provide Javier with any relevant information was a different ordeal in itself.

“You’re still sleeping with your informants?” Nina gasped a little, clicking her tongue and shaking her head in disappointment. “Why am I not surprised?”

Javier sighed and rolled his eyes, pulling himself off Nina’s bed and grabbing his denim jeans that had been previously discarded on the floor. “C’mon Ni, don’t get jealous now. We haven’t been together for like, a year.” Javier hummed, zipping up his pants. His eyes darted around the room as he tried to locate his shirt. Maybe there was no fixing this. For a split second, he’d forgotten why things had ended with Nina, but now it was becoming clear again. He just had to get outta there. He needed air, and a smoke.

“I let you cum inside of me and you moan out another woman’s name!” Nina exclaimed, shaking her fists in the air. “Javier Peña I fucking hate you!”

Javier offered Nina a small shrug of his shoulders before finding his shirt and buttoning it up. “I’ll see you around Ni.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Called him seventeen times Con, he’s taking the piss.” Steve grimaced, aggressively flicking to the next page of the Bogotá local newspaper.

“Will you just calm down? He’s our friend. We’re doing him a favour. He'll be back soon,” Connie sighed, glancing back over to you, where you had been sleeping on the sofa for the past two and a half hours. “She sleeps better than our Liv,” Connie noted. “Wish we could sleep as well as that.”

Steve hummed in agreement. “I’ll go check on Liv.” He announced at the mention of his daughter. He’d put her down for a nap about an hour ago in Javier’s bedroom.

“No honey, I’ll go. You keep working on your crossword,” Connie giggled before pointing her index finger into one of the blank squares. “Fourteen down: Los huevos revueltos.”

“I would’ve got that,” Steve huffed, scrambling to write the answer down. He definitely would not have. The Spanish puzzle was made for infants and yet he was still struggling.

“Whatever Murph.” Connie rolled her eyes, leaving the table where they were both sitting at.

The second she left the room, you woke up in a cold sweat, feeling dizzy and shaking from a nightmare you didn’t want to remember. Your cheeks were wet, tear stained and goose pimples pricked at your arms. You checked your surroundings in a fluster, not recognising the brown leather couch you were laying on, or the oak wood coffee table in front of you, or even the television pushed against the cream coloured walls. A man with blonde hair and mustache raced over to you, and dropped to his knees, holding you by your shoulders.

“Are you okay?” The man quizzed, his blue eyes searching to meet yours. You were horrified, the feeling of an unfamiliar man grabbing you like this. You screamed in terror, and defensively dug your fingernails into his skin. The man yelped out and stumbled back from you, hitting the coffee table in the process. “Fuck-- shit-- ow--” He gasped. “Connie!” he called. “Connie, she's awake!”

The way he yelled and screamed your name... it was like you were some kind of monster. You hated it.

The sound of footsteps padding into the living room alerted you, and a woman, not much older than you, knelt down in front of you. But unlike the man, she knew well enough to keep her distance. “Hi sweetheart, are you alright? I’m Connie, don’t be afraid. You’re okay.” she assured you, her voice sweet like honey.

“Where am I?” you choked out, tears filling your eyes.

Connie hesitated for a moment. “She doesn’t remember where she is?” Steve asked Connie with concern, scratching the back of his neck as he pulled himself together and shuffled over to you. Taking a note out of Connie’s book, he kept his distance. Connie briefly explained to her husband how your behaviour right now actually made a lot of sense, and how victims of PTSD can often have ‘memory blanks’.

“Darling, I’m Connie Murphy. I’m a nurse. And this is my husband Steve. Steve is DEA. He’s friends with Javier Peña. You know that name, right? Javier Peña.” She repeated his name slow and steady, allowing you to take your time to process the words. Javier Peña. Just like that, a wave of calmness washed over you. His name felt like home. It felt like safety.

“I know Javi.” you whispered in admittance, shuffling around on the sofa. You could feel your lips trembling. It was strange. You were new to Bogotá, and you didn’t really have any friends, other than the late Rosa. And well, Javier too. He was a client, sure, but he was always kind and gentle with you, unlike your other customers. You’d like to think of him as a friend. Right now, he was the only person you had.

“This is Javier’s place. He’s going to watch over you for a little while, okay?” Connie explained. “We are your friends and we’re not going to hurt you. I promise,” the lady soothed. She turned to Steve. “Bring over Olivia.”

“What-- why?” Steve quizzed, his eyebrows furrowing together in bewilderment.

“She needs to know she can trust us. Bring over Olivia,” Begrudgingly following his wife’s instruction, a wary Steve stood up and padded into Javier’s bedroom where Olivia had been left to sleep in a small, transportable crib. He picked up his daughter and carried her into the living room. “This is my daughter Olivia,” Connie told you quietly, smoothing out Olivia’s black hair. “She’s one year old. Would you like to hold her?”

“Connie are you fucking crazy?” Steve snapped.

“I’m a fucking nurse Steve, I know what I’m doing.” Connie hissed back, taking Olivia from her father. She looked back over to you and her deep frown turned into a comforting smile as she slowly handed you the baby. Connie’s hands never left Olivia, and she made an effort to support her head as you cradled the sleeping baby in your arms.

Holding Olivia Murphy gave you a feeling of responsibility. If Steve and Connie were dangerous, they would never have shown you their daughter, let alone allow you to hold her in your arms. You contemplated everything and although it was hard, you decided that you probably could trust them. Still, it raised the question: “Where is Javi?”

Steve shook his head incredulously and stood up, grabbing the phone from one of the side tables and dialling his partner’s number again. You didn’t know what was wrong with the blonde haired agent, but you got the impression that he did not want to be here.

“Steve is going to call him, again. He went to get groceries. I’m sure he won’t be long.” Connie informed softly, and you nodded your head.

“Your baby is adorable,” you announced quietly and Connie smiled, thankful you were beginning to talk a little more. Seemingly, you’d calmed down, which meant Connie’s comforting approach had worked.

“She’s a real gem, isn’t she?”

Javier was just a couple of blocks away when his carphone began to ring. He eyed up the display and read the ‘17 missed calls’, cursing under his breath. He clicked the accept button and continued to drive.

“Javier Peña. You prick.”

“Hi bestie.” Javier grinned, shaking his head at Steve’s introduction. Typical.

“You left us here for three fucking hours with some random girl -- who, by the way, is incredibly unstable, Javier. I don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, but I’m not here for it. Where the fuck have you been? No, forget that. You better be home in the next ten minutes and you better have the ingredients for my fucking paella.” Steve growled before angrily slamming the phone down on the hook.

Javier couldn’t help but chuckle. Steve Murphy was ever the drama queen.

As he drove down the street, he made one final attempt to shrug off what had happened with Nina. Okay, yeah, saying your name was a little uncalled for. But she always got so needy and possessive -- even when she had no reason to be. Nina and Javier weren’t exclusive and hadn’t been for a long time, so, what was her deal?

What was even more concerning to Javi, was the fact he said your name in the first place. Nina looked rather similar to you. Not identical, but from a distance, there was a chance she could’ve been mistaken. Only, when he was pounding into her from behind, he wasn’t at a distance. In fact he couldn’t have been any closer, and yet he still said your name. He was really struggling to justify it.

Sure, he’d been thinking about you when he was inside of her. But was that really so bad? You were clearly on his mind, and Javier just pinned that down to the fact he’d been out all day investigating the crime scene at the brothel. He’d been with you, he’d held you and comforted you. Fuck, even before noon he had been fucking your mouth. It wasn’t exactly unreasonable…

But moaning out your name… shit, could Javier really get past that? Was there any way to justify that -- other than the blatant and glaring honest reason that Javier refused to admit. He wouldn’t even let his mind go there. Whatever, it was fine. He was home now. The end of a long day.

Javier grabbed the groceries from the back of his car and buzzed himself into the DEA apartment block where he and Steve were living. Making his way over to his apartment, he opened the front door and set the brown paper bag of ingredients down on the kitchen counter. When he got home, Connie was just finishing up painting your nails a beautiful sea blue gel colour. She turned around and she looked up at Javier. Your eyes, however, were already fixated on him the second he entered the room.

“Where’s Steve?” Javier asked, diverting his gaze from the two women and continuing to unpack the food.

“He went home. He’s pissed, Javi.” Connie admitted, shaking her head in annoyance and placing the pot of nail polish on the coffee table. She walked into the open space kitchen and nudged the agent.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Javier muttered, stacking the canned goods into a cupboard.

“I’m going home, but don’t think we’ve forgotten about the paella. Steve wants that fucking paella,” Connie chastised. Javier nodded his head but remained silent as he emptied his bag of shopping. “Unbelievable.” Connie scoffed incredulously, and opened the front door before slamming it behind her.

“Thanks Con!” Javier called, but there was no telling if she even heard.

Javier was half way through putting his shopping away when he heard your meek and softly spoken voice call his name in a questioning tone. His dark eyes looked over at you. You were sitting upright on the sofa and his face softened. Stopping what he was doing, he neglected the bag of groceries and padded into the living room to sit down next to you.

“Hi.” Javier murmured, crossing his legs and adjusting the crochet blanket that was covering your lap.

“Hi.” you replied, feeling somewhat shy and slightly nervous, for a reason you couldn’t quite place.

“How are you feeling?” Javier asked, bringing himself to look at you.

“Um,” you fumbled at the blanket and thought for a moment. It was a loaded question. Other than the overwhelming feeling of distress and helplessness, you decided to give the agent a simple answer. “Well rested. A little thirsty.”

Javier nodded. “How would you feel about taking a bath?”

You swallowed back a knot in your throat that you hadn’t even realised was there in the first place. “...Do I smell?” you asked, You stretched out and gave your underarms a sniff, prompting Javier to burst out into laughter. Shit, had you always been that adorable? Your nose scrunched up at the distinct smell of dried up blood on your clothes and your shoulders slumped sadly. Javi, noticing your change in demeanor, gently lifted up the blanket and wrapped it around your body.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he cooed. “Believe me, I get stinky too. It happens. Let me help you take a bath. Come with me.”

Taking his hand, Javier navigated you towards the bathroom. It was a small boxy room with barely any space to move around, and yet, to your surprise, it fit a bathtub. Javier twisted the faucet, and the tap began to run warm water. He picked up a bottle of bubble bath and a tub of salts. “I have a bad back,” Javier told you. “These salts really help me relax. And the bubbles are nice too.”

You nodded with a smile. As he emptied the contents into the tub, you watched the products swirl into a colourful abyss. “It smells like you.” you uttered, without really thinking about the weight of your words. Javier said nothing, and you both sat by the side of the tub in comfortable silence, watching as it filled up. He occasionally dipped his hand in the water, checking the temperature.

“Will you be okay?” Javier asked you, taking out a towel and folding it up on top of the toilet seat.

You weren’t really sure, but you nodded your head anyway. Just as he was about to leave, you spoke up again. “Actually, Javi, could you stay?”

Javier fumbled a little but smiled. “Yeah, of course.”

Javier had seen you naked countless times due to the nature of your job but for some reason, this time, it felt different. He’d never had a woman use his bathtub before, let alone be requested to stay in her presence as she got undressed and stepped inside. You slipped out of your sultry, blood stained dress and let it pool to the floor. Javi’s mouth parted as he took in your naked form under the amber tinted bathroom lights.

You stepped inside the tub and almost slipped over, but Javier, as quick as lightning, grabbed your arm and steadied you. “Sorry,” he muttered, and your hand slid into his. As your fingers interlocked, you felt something. It was like a bolt of electricity, running up your arm, and judging by Javier’s reaction, he could feel it too. “I should’ve warned you. It can be a little slippery.”

You giggled and tried to tear yourself from Javi’s grip, but he didn’t let go of you once. Instead, he helped you sit down comfortably amongst the bubbles and aromatic hot water. You moaned, feeling your body become indulged and your muscles soften. You smiled and laid back, the bubbles fizzing around your neck and chin, and Javier felt his heart swell in his chest as he noticed your lips curl into a smile. It was the smile he would kill to see, and he hadn’t even realised how much he missed it.

“Just relax,” Javier soothed. “I’ll be back faster than you can count to ten.”

Javier ran into the kitchen and took a glass from one of the cupboards before racing back to the bathroom. Kneeling down by the side of the tub, he dipped the glass into the water, filling it up, and gently emptied it down your hair.

“Close your eyes,” he requested, continuing to wet your hair ample enough until it was ready to be shampooed. Taking the bottle of his musky scented shampoo, Javier squirted the thick liquid into your scalp and began to massage it in. You couldn’t believe how gentle he was, and how he was taking his time with you. You’d never in a million years imagine Javier Peña being like this, or acting this intimate, with any woman -- especially not you. To be honest, his own behaviours were even coming to shock Javier. But he just let his instincts take over. He wanted to protect you and make sure you knew just how safe you were. That was the most important thing on his mind.

Once he rinsed your hair, he grabbed some soap and a sponge, handing them to you. “Do you uh-- uh-- do you think you can wash your own body?” He asked, his dark eyebrows knitting together. “If not, that’s okay. I can help. But--”

You smiled and rested a wet hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay Javi. I’ll be fine.” you promised, taking the sponge from him.

“I’m going to find you some clothes to change into.” He told you. “Shout if you need me. I won’t be long.”

And he stuck by his word. Javier raked through his drawers and picked out a pale yellow button down shirt that he hadn’t worn in a few years and a pair of boxer shorts. Padding back into the bathroom, he presented you with them. “It’s not much but it’s all I have,” he told you. “I’m sure Con will take you out shopping at some point. Or we can hop on back to your place tomorrow to grab some of your stuff,” You smiled and stood up, making sure to be careful not to slip this time. Javier held out the towel for you and wrapped you in it. “I’ll leave you to get dried.”

When Javier went back into the kitchen, he figured he should put the rest of the groceries away, only to notice that the once frozen paella ingredients had become defrosted and been rendered completely useless. “Shit.” Javier cursed, pushing them to one side and running a hand through his hair. Looks like after all of this, he couldn’t make paella tonight. He knew he was about to get an earful from Steve at work tomorrow.

“Do you like pizza?” Javier called, rummaging around for a take-out menu and grabbing his phone from the counter.

“I do!” you called back, buttoning up Javier’s shirt and wrapping a towel around your head.

When you padded into the kitchen, dressed in Javi’s clothes, the agent felt his throat dry up. You were a sight to behold. You smelt distinctly like him, but you already looked one thousand times better now that you were clean and comfortable. You felt better, too. It was amazing what a bath could do to you. You shimmied onto one of the bar stools Javier kept by the counter and rest your elbows against the laminate. Javier passed you the menu so you could look over the dishes.

You agreed on a simple chilli pizza, which was one of Javier’s favourites anyway. Javi called the deli and asked for a large, planning on sharing it with you. Remembering that you’d mentioned you were thirsty, he poured you a glass of water and handed it your way.

“Steve is gonna be so mad at me tomorrow,” Javier chuckled, rubbing his temple. You peeked up from the glass that you nursed and looked up at him through your eyelashes. “I promised him paella and I’m not gonna be able to make it tonight. Not only that but he’s gonna ask me where I’ve been. He’ll know I wasn’t out getting groceries for three hours.”

You furrowed your eyebrows together and tilted your head. “Three hours? Where were you?”

Javier paused and absent-mindedly brushed a finger along his mustache. “I bumped into an ex at the store. Went back to her place and-- you know.”

Your eyes fell back into your glass of water. “Oh.”

Javier picked at his short fingernails and another sigh left his lips. “Shit, I just--” he shook his head. “Made a mistake. A very big mistake.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Yeah, that would probably be for the best but how could he even begin to tell you what happened, when you were part of the problem? Javier figured it might even scare you away. “It doesn’t matter… she’s just…” Javier scratched his head. “She’s fine. It’s a ‘me’ problem, I think.”

The doorbell rang and Javier was grateful for the interruption. He paid the pizza delivery guy and sent the stone bake on the table.

“It looks good,” you smiled. “I’ve never had Colombian pizza.”

Javier’s jaw dropped. “You--?” He shook his head in disbelief. “Dulzura, how long have you lived here?”

“A month,” you grinned, with a mouthful of pizza. “Tastes good.”

After you’d finished eating, it had gotten pretty late. You and Javier exchanged small talk, learning little things about each other. You liked it a lot. He had always been an enigma to you, and even though he offered little information, it was still something, and you appreciated that a lot.

“It’s been a difficult day,” Javier noted, folding the pizza box and throwing it away to be recycled. “You should take my bed.”

“No,” you insisted. “I’m fine on the sofa. Honestly.”

Javier sighed. “I’m not going to let you sleep on the sofa any longer. You’ll get back ache.”

“Then I’ll just use your bath salts.” You smirked in retaliation. Javier laughed and you relished the way small crinkles appeared in the corner of his honey coloured eyes.

“Please, take my bed.” Javier said, staring at you pointedly. His eyebrows were raised and his strong arms were crossed over his chest.

You were about to argue further but truthfully, sleeping in a bed tonight sounded like exactly what you needed. You took a few steps closer to Javier, a pool of butterflies swirling in your stomach as you broke any distance between you both. You wanted to kiss his lips so desperately, taste him once again. It was only earlier today you’d had your lips wrapped around his cock, and yet, so much had happened in between then and now. You wondered if Javier was thinking about it too.

“Get some sleep, hermosa.”

Your eyes were completely trained on his soft pink lips. You wanted to kiss-- you just wanted to kiss him. Just one kiss. Just one-- you leaned in and shut your eyes, and neared him, closer and closer... but Javier stepped away.

And you felt your heart shatter in your chest.

“Nothing personal,” he told you. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea.”

Nothing personal? How were you meant to accept that? You had literally sucked him off just a few hours ago and now he wouldn’t even grace you with a kiss? Maybe Rosa was right; you shouldn’t form crushes on clients. Especially not Javier Peña. You’d only get hurt. You tugged on the sleeves of his button down shirt and balled your fingers into a fist, trying to ignore the pain in your chest.

Without uttering a word, not even a ‘goodnight’, you sulked away and into his bedroom.

Javier wanted to shout out. He didn’t want you to be mad at him, or even upset. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt you. It took him all the strength he could muster to deny you of that kiss. Your perfect lips looked so soft and delicate and if Javier could have it his way, he would’ve taken you in that very moment.

But you were more than just a sex worker now. You were a compliance in the hunt to catch Escobar -- and he had to be careful. No matter what, he couldn’t risk losing track of the bigger picture.

-—-—-—♡—-—-—-

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bokebelle · 3 years

Text

just like the stories - armin arlert

WARNINGS: none, just a ton of armin fluff.

PAIRINGS: armin arlert x gn!reader

WORD COUNT: 1.7k

a/n: this is my first time writing something this long and i’m very open to feedback and suggestions as to how i can improve!

requests: OPEN

Armin was 18 when he first started falling for you. It was all innocent at first. He loved the way you smile was brighter than the sun, and how your eyes shone brighter than any star in the sky. But as time went on and he grew older, the love he felt for you ran deeper than any ocean he could read about.

He fell harder for your bright smile, knowing that there were days when you just didn’t feel like smiling. He fell deeper for the spark in your eyes, remembering the days he wiped the tears that threatened to douse their light. You made him feel like he was on cloud nine, but kept him grounded with your gentle words and soothing touch.

That's why 2 years later, Armin was where he was now: sitting on a bench, with you beside him, reading out loud a book he had carefully picked, hoping you would read between the lines and figure out he was in love with you.

“And it was in that moment her heart had felt the thrill of being in love.” he couldn't stop himself from looking at you. He couldn’t help admiring how you leaned your head back and closed your eyes, taking in every word that came from his mouth.

"It was intoxicating, almost addicting. She allowed herself to drown in the scent of her lover, she simply couldn’t get enough. She wasn’t afraid to be burned by the fire that bloomed in her heart when their lips were locked in heated moments of passion. Despite the pain, she wasn’t afraid if one day, her lover decided to seek shelter in the arms of another, for the love she felt was enough to make her feel alive for a lifetime and a day. She wasn’t afraid to love.

She realized that through it all, love was the thrill that made her feel alive. It was the promise of a love that made life more beautiful that made her hope and dedicate her heart no matter how many times it broke.

In her beloved she saw the farthest of galaxies and the deepest of oceans. In their promises of love, she learned the truths of life and the secrets of the universe. As she locked eyes with the one that held her heart, she saw that the beauty in it all, in the good and the bad, was knowing that at the end of the day, she was loved and that she was in love.” Armin concluded. “The end.”

“That was such a sappy ending” you say, finally opening your eyes to look at blue eyed boy before you.

Armin was always cute, with his button nose, ocean blue eyes, golden fluffy hair, and optimism that made you think he was like the sun. The more time passed, the more you realized the word “cute” didn’t fit him anymore. He was kind and friendly, with a sharp mind and quick wit. You started to think maybe he wasn’t like the sun, maybe he was brighter than the sun itself. But the more you got to know him, the more you understood even the sun bowed to the darkness of the night.

Armin was insecure about never being the obvious choice. He was smart, yes, but he was worried about never being as funny as Connie, or as charismatic as Jean, or as strong as Mikasa. You always assured him that he didn’t have to be like them. He didn’t need to be like his friends to be enough. To you, Armin was always enough. You were always too scared to tell him how you really felt. You were afraid he would push you away, thinking he wouldn’t be enough for you, thinking you’d ruin everything if he didn’t give you, or himself, a chance. And so you kept quiet for both your sake and his and kept your feelings hidden in the deepest corners of your heart. But despite wanting to shout the truth into the world, you felt okay keeping it a secret if it meant having him by your side a day longer. He was your bright sun that shone in the summer sky, and even in his dark moments, he shone like the moon on a clear night.

You always found Armin cute, but when you learned about the ugly things he had a hard time loving, the parts that you loved for the both of you, you started to think differently. And in this moment, as the light caught in his blond hair making him glow before you, you can’t help but think how beautiful Armin is.

“Well, I liked it.” he said, closing the book and setting it on his lap

"I’m not saying I didn’t like it. It was just sappy. And besides, you’ve always been a hopeless romantic so maybe that's why you liked it.” you tease him with a smile.

‘Hopeless, maybe’ he thought. He took a deep breath and hoped he had it in him to be romantic.

“to be loved and to be in love sounds nice though, doesn’t it?” his heart drums in his ears, a faint blush painting the apples of his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. “To feel so strongly about someone and knowing they feel the same way about you.”

You simply smile at him, and he takes this as a cue to continue. “Imagine finding someone who makes the world make sense. Someone who makes you feel safe, and welcome. Someone who makes you feel like home wherever you go.”

“That would be nice.” you agree as you entertain his train of thought, ignoring your own thoughts of what it would be like to hold his hand, or kiss his cheeks. “But they’re works of fiction for a reason. I’m not trying to be a downer but not everyone finds love and gets it in return. Sometimes you just have to be happy watching from the sidelines.”

Armin felt a twinge of doubt in his heart. Maybe you’re right. Maybe he should be happy watching you from the sidelines. However, he managed to stop himself before he let his negative thoughts take over.

‘Better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all’ right? He took a deep breath and shook his doubt away. He would never know if he had a chance of winning the game if he always resigned himself to watching from the sidelines.

“It may be fiction but it’s possible.” He counters. “It’s possible to find someone has all your words and promises but leaves you speechless. To know someone like the back of your hand, but they keep you guessing every time. Someone who makes life exciting but makes you feel at peace at the same time”

“And how do you know it’s possible, Mr. Romance expert? You in love with someone?” you manage to joke despite an ugly jealous feeling starting to bloom in your gut.

“It’s possible because that’s how I feel with you.” Armin confesses, and you could swear in that moment time froze. You suddenly became hyperaware of how he was fiddling with his fingers, how his eyes were fixed on you. His cheeks were turning pink, and he nervously licked his lips. He was flustered. More flustered than you had ever seen.

“Just hear me out okay? I like you, I like you a lot. You make all the romance books I’ve read make sense. When they talk about that warm feeling in your chest, or the feeling of being home, suddenly I understand them because of you. Cliché and sappy words make sense because that’s what I think when I look at you, that’s what I feel. I’ve been in love with you since I was 18, you know? I don’t know when it started, but I don’t regret it one bit. And if you give me a chance, I hope you don't regret it too. I know I’m not the strongest or even the tallest, I don’t have a lot to offer except my heart that chooses you every day and my arms that were made to hold you. It’s corny, I know but that’s all I have to give you and I hope that’s enough.”

You keep quiet for a moment before letting out a small giggle. You had spent all this time keeping quiet only to realize he felt the same way. And top it all off, after he poured his heart out to you, saying the words you always wished he would tell you, the words you were always too scared to admit, Armin was still worried about not being enough. It was in the vulnerability in his beautiful blue eyes that you finally found the strength to do what you’ve always wanted to do, to say the words you’ve always wanted to say.

“Gosh Armin, for someone so smart you can be really dumb sometimes.” you tease, accidentally giving him the wrong impression.

Armin felt numb. You didn’t feel the same. He was dumb for thinking someone like him had a chance with someone like you. But before he could feel his heart break in two, he felt your lips gently on his.

You were kissing him? His mind couldn’t process everything that was happening fast enough so that by the time he was ready to kiss you back, you had pulled away.

“Armin you’re always enough for me, you’re more than enough. I don't care about what you're not, what matter is what you are, and you are always enough” You whisper, holding his beautiful face in your hands so his eyes meet yours. “and if you still don’t believe then that's fine, I can love you enough for the both of us.”

Armin’s brain finally caught up with what was happening, and his heart had started beating to the promise of your words. He was enough. He was enough for you, and he was enough for himself. For once, his words failed him, so he decided to kiss you back, knowing that was enough for you both.

No love story could ever describe the way his lips felt against yours. No poem could detail how lovely his fingertips felt as they traced gentle patterns against your skin. The greatest novelists or poets would never come close to describe what it felt like to have a love like this. It was a love meant to be preserved in the stars. A love considered fictional by most, and rare by few. It was a love one could only dream of having, a love only you and your beautiful blue-eyed boy lived out everyday.

You lived a love so great and pure, would happily spend all your lifetimes and more, knowing what it’s like to be loved by and to be in love with Armin Arlert.

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toomanystoriessolittletime · 3 years

Text

mix up

Summary: A mix up with the buildings laundry was all it took to get what you always secretly wanted.

Pairing: Javier Peña x OFC (can be read as reader insert)

Wordcount: 4k+

Warnings: lots of cursing, smut (Oral; female receiving; sex), sex toys, also fluff, bad flirting as ususal

A/N: In my mind, this was a drabble. Apparently my brain had other ideas. The biggest thank you to @f0rever15elf for being my beta on this <3

Masterlist

Taglist in reblog

Pushing the laundry bin with your dirty laundry out of your apartment, you checked if you had everything before you locked the door of your apartment behind you. It was laundry day. Thankfully the apartment in Bogata came with a laundry service. Not that you were not able to do your own laundry, you simply didn’t have time for it. The last thing on your mind while chasing down Escobar was doing your laundry. The job took every single second of your life, even in the few times you were off from work, even in your sleep. Walking down the long hallway, the last door you passed was Javier’s. You heard him curse something in spanish before the door opened and a similar laundry bin was placed in front of his door. You tilted your head as you looked at him, crossing your arms in front of your chest, a little grin on your lips.

“What?” He asked looking down at himself.

“Nothing.” You hummed. “I love that color on you.” You winked before you walked out.

“Fuck you too.” He chuckled as he followed you.

“What? I do love it. As a matter of fact I own some pink stuff I wear occasionally.” You unlocked the car and he jumped into the passenger's seat.

Javier and you were co-workers. He had joined you in the hunt for Escobar only shortly after you arrived here from DC. You would say you even became friends. As possible as it was to become friends with him. There were only a handful of people who knew the lengths you had to go through at this job. Of course, he had tried to get into your pants first but the both of you decided it would be for the better to keep this strictly non physical. At least that’s what you told yourself.

Though secretly you felt yourself wishing it was you on the receiving end of his “affection” as you lay in bed alone at night, while he was fucking some prostitute on the other side of the building.

“I’ve never seen you wearing anything pink, Guapa.” He pushed his yellow aviators up as he reached for the pack of cigarettes. You started the engine and looked at him.

“Oh Javier… There are many things you haven’t seen me wear.” You winked. You could see when the penny dropped and he shook his head, with a small grin.

“Fuck. I didn’t even have my coffee yet and you put pictures of you in underwear inside my head?”

“I never said it was my underwear. But… That’s payback for making me listen to the moaning from your apartment last night.” You finally got the car on the road.

“Jealous?” He asked, holding his cigarette by the window. You mentioned once that you weren’t a big fan of smoke but didn’t mind it. He had made the effort to turn himself away from you from that day on when he smoked.

“More curious.” You said honestly.

“How so?” You stopped at a red light, turning your head to look at him.

“We both know you are paying most of those women, so how real is their… valuation with you if you know what I mean?” You were genuinely curious. You had two relationships before and both of them didn’t really care for your pleasure. You had been responsible for your own orgasms all your life and you were wondering…

“Oh they aren’t acting Guapa. I know what I’m doing.” He winked at you and threw his cigarette out.

“Every man says that.” You shrugged, rolling your eyes.

“Well… You’ll have to trust my word. The only way you could be sure was if I showed you, and we both agreed that nothing will ever happen between us, right?” He asked. You nodded and looked away from him, starting the car again, when the light switched to green. You didn’t notice him looking at you as you continued to drive.

“If we wouldn’t be working together, would you?” He asked as you parked the car in front of the embassy and killed the engine. The car ride had been silent since the red light.

“Would I what?” You asked pulling your purse out from the backseat.

“Let me show you that I definitely know what I’m doing?” He asked, his voice deeper as he looked into your eyes. You looked back into his and wondered if anyone had ever noticed the small caramel like spot in this right eye.

“I guess that’s another thing you will never find out, Peña.” You had a small smile on your lips, hoping to cover up your nervousness. He looked at you knowingly before he let his tongue dart out to wet his lips. You swallowed, your eyes flying to his lips before you looked up and he bit his lip.

“Shame,” he whispered before he opened the car door and got out of the car. You closed your eyes, ignoring the throbbing between your legs as you watched him go into the building.

“Fucking hell,” you muttered, shaking your head to follow him inside.

Weeks went by without either of you mentioning the conversation between you. At some point, you thought you imagined the whole thing. You continued to work together. You both took care of Steve when Connie left to go back to the states unannounced. You couldn’t blame her. You’ve been wondering yourself if what you were doing would end in catching Escobar in the end.

Javi and you were a pretty damn good team at work. He always had your back which was a gift you truly cherished. When you had first met him and Steve, you would have bet a lot of money that they would be just like the other assholes you had worked with before. But they weren’t. Of course Javier continued to flirt with you. That’s just who he was. But he also did acknowledge your intelligence and knew when he had to shut up and actually listen. You grew so comfortable with each other that just one look from the other would tell if it was a good day, or a bad day.

Today had been a bad day for you.

Not only was the lead you had chased the day before a dead end, but you just felt exhausted. Like the last weeks of working constantly came crashing down at you all at once. So you called in sick. For the first time… ever. You ignored that one of the reasons you felt so shitty was the fact that Steve and Javier had been gone for 3 days now.

A knock on your door made you groan but you made your way to open up anyway, thanking the lady with your clean laundry with a smile before you closed the door and brought it into your bedroom. Deciding to put the clothes away right now instead of letting them stay on your bed as you usually did, you frowned when you saw a very pink shirt on the bottom. You let your fingers run over the fabric. It was Javi’s shirt. The one you teased him about.

Biting your lip, you looked down at it. You should give it back to him. You knew that. But he would be gone for at least another two days and you felt lonely. You opened the buttons, pulling the shirt you were wearing off and got his shirt on. You looked at yourself in the mirror. You had never worn a shirt of a man before, and when you pictured it before you weren’t thinking about a pink shirt, or Javi’s, but somehow you liked the way it looked on you. Smiling to yourself you pulled the fabric closer and you could swear you smelled his aftershave even though it was freshly cleaned. You did spend more time than you would ever admit to anyone thinking about him. The way he walked. The way he ran his hands through his hair when he was frustrated. How you could see his chest hair when he was wearing his poorly buttoned shirts. Closing your eyes you shook your head.

Coworker. He was your Coworker.

Your very attractive Coworker who you caught undressing you with his own eyes more than once. In the quiet of your apartment you often dreamed what it would be like. Him touching you. You knew he could have anyone, yet he chose to pay for sex. He didn’t seem like he was looking to have any relationship, and you couldn’t blame him. But what if he chose you? What if he wasn’t your Coworker? What if he was just Javi? Your neighbor. What if you weren’t in Colombia chasing down drug lords?

You pictured him coming home to you and taking you on the kitchen table. Would he go down on you? You bet he would. He seemed like he enjoyed pleasuring his woman. His woman. You wanted to be his woman. Even though you knew he wasn’t looking for someone. He told you before on a very drunken night out that he sucked at relationships. He just needed someone to make him forget, someone…

A knock on your door interrupted your thoughts again. Looking at yourself you considered answering whoever was at the door dressed in this shirt but decided against it and put on your bathrobe. There was another knock at your door.

“One second!” You called pulling the bathrobe closer around your body as you unlocked your door.

“Javi?” You asked, surprised. “I thought you’d be back on Saturday.” You pulled the bathrobe around you closer, suddenly feeling too naked to be standing in front of him, even though your whole body was covered.

“You’re okay. Thank.. Fuck. You’re okay.” He sighed relieved looking at you.

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” You frowned, a little confused.

“I went to the embassy and no one knew where you were and…” He closed his eyes.

“I called in sick. I’m okay. I promise.” You said quietly. He ran his hand over his mouth, his other hand on his hip as he looked at you, his eyes tired.

“Are you okay Javier?” You asked a little confused at him just showing up like that. “Why are you back already?”

“Dead end. Didn’t see the point of staying there.” He shrugged.

“Okay. Then you should go to..”

“What are you wearing there?” he asked and nodded towards you.

“Uhm…” You looked down at yourself and tried to hide your surprise at seeing a bit of the pink shirt out. You looked up at him again, and you could see his grin.

“Is that pink I see?” His grin got wider. You sucked your bottom lip in.

“I told you I wear pink. Occasionally.” You shrugged. He nodded and continued to look at you before he stepped a little closer. You could see in his eyes that he was trying to work out what was going on and you noticed the moment he made the connection. His eyes darkened and you cursed yourself for not changing out of his shirt before you answered the door.

“Is that… my shirt?” He whispered deeply. A shudder ran over your body. His hand came up, reaching for the collar that you apparently hadn’t tucked in as well as you thought you had. His finger brushed over your throat as his other hand slowly opened your bathrobe. One of your hands held your shirt together that you didn’t bother to button up. You shouldn’t have put it on in the first place.

“Fuck, you’re wearing my shirt,” he cursed. You looked up at him, breathing deeply. You weren’t wearing anything but some panties beneath it. He looked down your body before he looked up at you again, his hand running up your neck to the back of your head.

You should take a step back, turn around and get away from him. Cause the way he was looking at you made your knees weak.

“Javi, I can explain…” You mumbled, but he only shook his head slowly. The look he gave you made your poor explanation die on your lips.

“Tell me to stop,” he whispered as he stepped even closer. You felt the coldness of his leather jacket as he pushed your bathrobe from your shoulders and you shivered.

“Close the door, Javier,” you whispered. He looked at you, taking you in before he turned around and closed and locked the door. Pulling off his leather jacket he let it fall to the floor as he stalked towards you.

“I will never be able to get this picture out of my head.” He said as he walked you backwards until your back hit a wall behind you.

“You… You don’t have to get this picture out of your head.” You whispered.

“No?” He asked. One of his hands coming down on your hip as his other hand brushed some of your hair away that had fallen in your face. You shook your head at him.

“If you want to see me in your shirts, make sure to leave them with me after…” You bit your lip.

“After?” He leaned down and you felt his breath on your face.

“After you’ve fucked me.” You whispered and sighed when his lips crashed down on yours. You grabbed onto his back, pulling him closer as he licked into your mouth. Parting your lips without resistance you moaned when you felt one of his hands slip down your back.

“Been dreaming about this for years.” He groaned against your lips as he kissed down your neck, pushing the shirt you were still wearing open and you saw his little smile when he saw your boobs.

“Me too.” You whimpered as his teeth scratched over your neck.

“Tell me.” He whispered, softly sucking on your pulse point on your neck before he kissed down your collarbone.

“Wanted you to feel against me. Wanted to… Ahh..” You cried out when his lips closed around one of your nipples.

“Tell me.” He groaned and looked up at you, not releasing the bud and sucked. You wouldn’t be able to continue to stand on your own feet if he kept that up.

“Wanted to taste you. Wanted you to taste me. Wanted you to…”

“Fuck you?” He asked, releasing your nipple with an obscene sound. You just nodded.

“Been wondering if you taste as good as you smell.” He whispered and kissed down your stomach.

“May I?” He knelt in front of you, his dark eyes wild as he looked up at you. You hesitated.

“I… No one ever….” You sucked your bottom lip in, shy all of the sudden. He seemed to understand immediately, cursing under his breath.

“You should be worshipped. Fucking losers. All of them.” He shook his head and got up from the ground.

“Will you let me?” He asked softly. There was nothing but affection in his eyes and you felt yourself nodding. You shrieked when he picked you up in his arms, moaning when he kissed you as he carried you to your bedroom. Carefully he set you down and you looked up at him. You wondered what this would change between you. Because you wouldn’t be able to go back to being just friends after this.

“You’re not just a fuck, hermosa.” He seemed to answer your thoughts.

“Let me feel you.” You said as you got up to stand in front of him. He didn’t stop you as you pulled his shirt out of his jeans and began to unbutton it, kissing his chest before you pulled it off. He groaned as you teased his nipple.

“Lay down on your back and let me take care of you.” He kissed you quickly and you complied, wanting to take the pink shirt off when he stopped you.

“No. Keep that on.” He smirked and you giggled.

“Whatever you want,” you hummed.

“Be careful what you wish for.” He said quietly as he looked down at you. A shiver ran over your body at the look he gave you and you could feel just how wet you were.

“What if I like playing with danger?” you asked. He furrowed his eyebrows before his hands opened the fly of his jeans. You swallowed, your eyes not leaving his as he pushed his jeans down. It was like he was challenging you to look and when you did you released a breath you couldn’t remember holding in. Of course he wasn’t wearing anything beneath his tight jeans.

When he was standing completely naked in front of you, he leaned down to slowly peel your embarrassingly damp panties down. He kissed up your leg, his mustache rubbing over the skin and you giggled when he kissed the skin behind your knees.

“Someone’s ticklish.” He mumbled against your skin.

“Maybe.” You smiled. He kissed up your inner thigh and unintentionally you wanted to close your legs but he didn’t let you.

“Let me look at you hermosa,” he whispered, looking up at you. You were only able to nod slowly.

“If this is how I die I won't complain.” He murmured before his tongue darted out to taste you. You wanted to look at him but the way he nibbled, licked, and sucked made you throw your head back, moaning loudly. You grabbed the bedsheets, trying to ground yourself as he sucked at you clit.

“So fucking good,” he groaned against you and you cried out.

“Fuck, keep going…,” you moaned. One of his hands on your stomach held you down while his other hand grabbed one of your boobs, kneading them, pulling at your nipple.

“Cum for me baby.” He whispered, his tongue dipping inside of you.

“Fuck….” You arched your back, heat rushing through your body as you almost blacked out when your orgasm washed over you.

This was unlike anything you ever felt before. You were so out of it you didn’t notice Javi stopped until his mouth was on your neck before he made you look at him. You felt his cock between your legs and you shakily breathed out, a blissful smile on your face as he leaned down to kiss you softly. You didn’t know nor did you care how long he kissed you, you just knew you never wanted to stop.

“You did enjoy that, right?” He asked and you punched against his chest, making him laugh.

“You’re awfully full of yourself, Agent Peña.” You shook your head and he cocked an eyebrow.

“What if I want you to be awfully full of myself?” He smirked.

“You did not just say that.” You snorted, shaking with laughter beneath him.

“Sorry,” he laughed with you, looking down at you.

“No you’re not.” You grinned and he chuckled.

“Do you though?” He asked, quieter now as his laughter subsided. You arched your eyebrow in question. “Want me to fuck you?” He kissed down your jaw, as he rolled his hips against yours.

“Is me naked beneath you not clue enough? I thought you knew that you were a good Agent and knew what you’re doing...” You teased, your hands wandering down his back, pulling him against you. He bit into your shoulder and you moaned.

“Oh I’m gonna show you that I know exactly…” He kissed you. You groaned as you felt the tip of his cock at your entrance. “How to make you cum.”

“Condoms... “ You gestured to your bedside drawer. He nodded, disappearing from your point of view before he was back, a dirty grin on his face.

“This is gonna be fun.” He whispered, holding a condom and your vibrator up. You blushed looking away from him.

“No need to be shy, hermosa.” He ripped the condom package open and pulled it over his hard cock. You felt his hand between your legs and you looked up at him, before two of his fingers entered you, his eyes never leaving yours.

“So If nobody ever made you cum by going down at you…” He kept fingering you slowly, adding another finger and you moaned quietly, feeling so full already.

“Did anyone ever make you cum?” He asked, his thumb slowly circling your clit and you were about to cum again when he stopped. You pouted.

“Huh?” He asked.

“Yes Javi. I made myself cum.” You groaned and he shook his head.

“Not anymore.” He hummed before you slowly felt himself push into you. You stopped breathing, looking up at him, embracing the delicious burn you felt as he split you in half. The sounds he was making would haunt you in the best way possible.

“So fucking tight,” he groaned and you released a breath when he was fully inside of you. He stilled, probably wanting you to get used to the stretch but all you wanted was..

“Move. Javi.” You pleaded and that was all he needed to hear.

“Feels better than I imagined.” He pressed, slowly fucking into you. He put your legs around his waist as he leaned down to kiss you. Holding him close, you let him fuck you, rolling your hips to meet his thrusts. Never in your life did you feel that full. He kissed every piece of skin his lips came in contact with and you grabbed onto his back, surely leaving marks as he moved faster.

“Please…,” you moaned.

“Please what Hermosa?” he rasped, sucking on your shoulder.

“Harder.” You whimpered.

“You want it harder my needy girl?” he asked. You were only able to nod as he pushed away from you, pulling your legs over his shoulders. He held on to your legs before he began to ram into you.

“You want it harder. You get it harder. You get everything you fucking want.” He groaned.

“Fuck yes.” You moaned, holding onto the mattress beneath you. Closing your eyes you just let him do whatever the fuck he wanted. Never in your life had you been fucked like that. The familiar buzzing of your toy let you snap your attention back to the man curently fucking the life out of you and you almost jumped when the vibe made contact with your clit.

“Shit…,” you cried out, surprised when your orgasm washed over you within seconds.

“Fuck fuck….” Javie groaned, fucking you through your orgasm, throwing the vibe away.

“Can you give me one more?” He asked. You shook your head, still trying to breath properly, when he pulled out of you and turned you so you were straddling him.

“Ride me baby.” He smiled up at you. You leaned down, kissing him longingly before you carefully sat down on his cock.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said in awe, looking up at you as you slowly rolled your hips, still oversensensetive from your orgasm. Both of his hands sneaked under his shirt you were still wearing, massaging your boobs.

“You gonna give me one more, hermosa?” He moaned quietly, pushing himself up, his arms coming around you, his chest against you as he moved his hips against yours.

“Javi…” You whimpered, holding on to his shoulders.

“Tell me what you need…”

“Kiss me,” you whispered. His lips were on you in the next moment and you shook as you felt your third orgasm approaching.

“Cum for me, Javi,” you whispered, clenching your walls, one of your hands pulling at his hair. He moaned against your chest as you felt him swell before he twitched and that was all it took for you to cum again.

Out of breath you held on to each other, your head on top of his, his lips still attached to your boob.

“We should have done this sooner,” he chuckled and you smiled as you looked at him.

“We should have,” you agreed. You felt him soften inside of you but not you nor him were ready to let go of one another. You kissed him softly.

“We could do this again, you know?” You said carefully. You knew you wouldn’t be able to share him with anyone, he had to know. He looked at you.“But I’m not sharing what’s mine,” you added.

“Yours, huh?” He asked, a little smile on his face. You nodded.

“I like the sound of that.” He said before he kissed you deeply.

#my writing #Javier Peña #fanfic #fanfiction #javier pena #Javier pena x reader #Javier pena x ofc #Javier pena x you #pedro pascal

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mooniefics · 3 years

Text

okkk ermmm here have this blurb,, bc my brain is feeling so clogged rn and i’ve been seeing jean n connie content all over tiktok (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b lowkey cucking connie here, lowkey more jean-centric, but i feel like connie would be the type to reluctantly admit that seeing u feeling good bc of another guy (especially one that y'all r good friends with) would reallllyyyy get him going LOL

you couldn’t quite remember how you’d gotten yourself into your current position.

not to say that you weren't enjoying it—that was definitely not the case. you’d become accustomed to plans going awry, like when jean had accidentally ordered a two hundred dollar champagne bottle at the club, just to drop it to the floor immediately after the scantily clad waitress taking care of your group had handed it to him, or the time that you’d made a stop for fast food on your night as designated driver and had to order connie to physically restrain sasha before she crawled through the drive-thru window and terrorized the night staff. but for the most part, every evening out ended with all of your friends going home in one piece, sometimes jean or sasha crashing at you and connie’s apartment when you were truly worried for their health post binge-drinking.

though, you couldn’t recall a night when connie had been so insistent for you to wear one of your more revealing dresses, or so openly enjoying the way jean had draped himself across you on the dance floor, doing nothing at all to intervene when he ran his hands down your body or pressed himself close enough to you that you could feel the length of his cock through his pants against your ass. you thought he had always been jealous type, usually shooing his friend away from you or shouting for him to back off with a flushed scowl etched into his features. but the way he was looking at the two of you as you danced, low-lidded eyes filled with a hunger you’d helped sate countless times before—you knew the revelation meant trouble.

the entire night had started to melt together into one continuous blur after sasha managed to talk you into downing more than enough shots of vodka to make anyone’s head spin, the only thing occupying your senses being the warmth of jean behind you, how with each sway of your hips your boyfriend’s gaze would become more and more intense, solely focused on you and his best friend’s flagrant display. somehow, you’d all made your way back to the apartment, leaving sasha in nikolo’s care after she begged to stay for a bit longer. through the mess of grabbing hands and hushed words, jean tugging you one way only for connie to pull you back to him, uncoordinated fingers unzipping and unclipping every article of clothing they could find, they’d managed to leave you completely at their mercy.

“shit, jean. you’re makin’ me kinda jealous..” connie muttered, words stringing together with obvious inebriation, one hand pinching at one of your nipples while the other kept a firm hold on your jaw, turning your head over your shoulder to face him.

he drew you back into another heated kiss before you could blink away the fog of arousal from your glassy eyes, muffling another whimper from jean’s tongue and it’s relentless motions over your clit. as if his slender fingers alone weren’t enough to make your vision spot with stars, he was ridiculously good with his mouth, leaving you a writhing, dripping mess in connie’s lap.

“not my fault i’m better at making her feel good.” jean snarked from between your legs, not stopping the snap of his wrist as he bit into the already marked flesh of your thigh, drawing another moan over connie’s lips, “maybe you should share with me more often, jus’ so she doesn’t get bored of sucking you off an’ getting nothing in return.”

“oh fuck off, you know that’s not true you fuckin’ ass.” your boyfriend grunted, tone taking on the typical aggression it had when he felt jean was getting too handsy with you, but doing nothing to actually stop him as he returned to kissing at your neck.

you allowed your back to rest against connie’s chest, a shaking hand working into jean’s hair, tangling in the thick, blonde locks when he crooked his fingers up into that terrible sensitive spot he’d been teasing as soon as he'd found it, hazel irises hungrily taking in your disoriented expression.

“’s okay, you can be honest with me.” he grinned, lips and chin drenched in the evidence of your arousal, “tell me the truth, baby.. i’ll let you cum on my fingers.”

“don’t tell him shit.” connie growled back, both hands squeezing at the soft flesh of your breasts, rolling your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

if you were more sober, you would’ve acknowledged the fact that he would probably let you cum either way, but the stifled judgement planted the thought of an unwavering ultimatum in your mind, the idea that you might not ever get to taste the relief that lay beyond the mounting pressure in your abdomen, drawn tight enough that you felt as if you could snap at any moment.

“p-please connie..!” you whined, grinding yourself down against his crotch in an attempt to appease him, fingers latching onto his wrist and pushing a hand further over your chest, words slurred and desperate, “need t’.. need to c-cum, please please please...”

“then tell me,” jean pulled your attention back down to him, licking his wet lips, pupils blown wide, “who's better at eating this pussy? him, or me?”

he barely gave any room for a response, free hand pressing into one of your thighs to make enough room for him to return to his previous position of lapping at your clit, pushing a mindless, strained response from your parted lips, “you—f-fuck—you! y-you’re better!!”

you couldn’t think to tune into connie’s upset exclamations as your head slumped back to rest on his shoulder, hips pressing up into jean’s skillful tongue and fingers, eyes squeezing shut as you moaned out a rambled string of curses, lips barely able to form around each syllable. any kind of control you held on your volume escaped you entirely, the hand in jean’s hair gripping tight as you nearly screamed, trembling and gasping, cumming around his fingers just like he promised you would.

your chest heaved in connie’s hands, body shakily lowering itself back against him, very cognizant of how hard he felt through his pants. as soon as you’d gathered your bearings enough to sit yourself properly in his lap, you looked to jean, who looked more than satisfied with himself sitting back on his calves, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and licking the two fingers that had previously been buried knuckle-deep into you.

“so, springer, ready to show me up?” he goaded, running a hand to push his hair out of his face, “it’s the least you can do after i got her all nice and wet for you.”

you felt your face heat, stealing a glance at your boyfriend, that flustered scowl weighing at his expression. “fuck yeah i am.”

“can’t wait to watch you try.” he laughed, grinning easily, hand sliding down to start undoing the button and zipper on his pants, dark eyes still roaming your naked finger as he pulled his cock free from the confines of his boxers.

you could tell this was going to be a long night.

hellooo my friend very quickly converting me into a full-on jean lover (o^ ^o)

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wakatvshi · 3 years

Text

late nights | jean kirstein x reader pt. 2

warnings: canon typical violence

word count: 1644

gif credit: on gif

authors note: part 2 of this story! the next part will come out after the update on my bertholdt fic! i really hope you enjoy this fic because I’ve worked hard on it!

summary: your progressing relationship with jean told through nights you spend together from marco’s death to the attack on marley. all of the ups and downs of life.

read part one here.

Since joining the Scouts nothing had gone right, it was a constant string of death and destruction. You’d known that though, you knew what the Scouts were. Commander Erwin didn’t hold anything back when he told you all what you would be facing. Even before that you knew the pain of the Scouts. Your father had been one and he’d died. So you knew it could be hell. But your first actual mission being against the female titan, against Annie, that wasn’t something you could have ever expected.

After the battle Annie had gone into some crystal and you lost her, the whole battle and loss of life was basically useless. There were positives in the situation, the Female Titan was under lock but it wasn’t enough for the MP’s. They were angry at Commander Erwin and to a point you understood, but no one but the Scouts seemed to understand the severity of what she was, what she’d done. How they were so detached from everything you couldn’t understand. There were talks happening now but what those were you weren’t privy to.

The best way you knew to take out your frustration was to train. Mikasa had agreed to help you with some hand-to-hand training and since Eren was meeting with Commander Erwin right now she didn’t have anything else to do. Of course she was winning, you knew she would when you asked but it was good training. Mostly just dodging and working on endurance for you.

Putting your hands on your knees you caught your breath as Mikasa rubbed her shoulder, “Okay. I think I’m going to give.” You were laughing but your lungs had a slight burn to them. There was always such a difference in training in the field and training like this. “Next time I’m asking Sasha, maybe she’ll pull punches.” You laughed.

A small smile was on Mikasa’s face when you stood up, “You would have been angry if I’d have done that.” She was right, “We’ve been at it for over an hour. I should see if Eren is back.” She was right about the time, you hadn’t realized it until you noticed the sun was setting.

She grabbed her shirt and pulled it back on, you’d both have to shower later but right now she was more interested in finding Eren and Armin. Sasha and Connie were heading out tomorrow so they were already sleeping, so you’d probably just head to the shower. Taking the towel she offered you, you wrapped it around your shoulders. It was your idea to train so you’d make sure everything was cleaned up, you couldn’t imagine how angry Captain Levi would be if he found out you guys made a mess and left it.

When the door opened you both turned around and saw Jean was standing in the doorway. He looked at you for a second before his eyes quickly went to Mikasa. You felt a sting when he looked at her. For a long time you tried to deny the fact that you did like him, he’d liked Mikasa since the first day he saw her and that didn’t really leave any room for your feelings. You respected that, if he didn’t think of you like that it was fine. Jean was still one of your best friends and so was Mikasa. But that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt when it was so clearly in front of you that you weren’t the one he wanted.

Forcing yourself to look away from him when Mikasa walked out you focused on trying to clean up what mess you guys had made. It wasn’t much, but things were out of order and that would cause issues. Focusing on something for a few minutes would help you get over the moment of jealousy. You felt bad about it, Mikasa hadn’t done anything, honestly you were surprised more people weren’t tripping over themselves to be near her. Still there were a few times you just wished you could be in her shoes, like when Jean forgot what he was saying because she walked into a room.

Before you finished you let out a huff realizing he was just standing there. “Did you need something?” You hadn’t meant to sound so harsh, you cursed yourself for not waiting until you were sure you had the jealous part of your brain shut off. Jean still had a pink tinge to his cheeks when you looked at him and for a moment he looked confused. “Jean?”

“Oh. Yeah, I just uh...” He cleared his throat rubbing the back of his neck, he was still blushing. “I just wanted to check on you. I know you got thrown by Ann- the Female Titan.” So he couldn’t call her by her name either. “I didn’t think you were supposed to be exerting yourself this soon.”

The nasty bruise you’d gotten on your back from the fight with her titan had not gone away, it still looked bad. But the sharp pain down your spine wasn’t really bothering you anymore and you had to do something. You were a soldier, you couldn’t let bruising stop you from training. She’d not killed you or paralyzed you so you were better than half the people that came in contact with her in a fight. You could handle being sore. You couldn’t survive if you got too soft.

Before you could pick up the training mat you and Mikasa had been using Jean was there picking it up instead. “I’m fine, just sore still.” He was opening his mouth to say something but you were faster. “Besides, Mikasa took it easy on me so there isn’t any real chance I could have hurt myself anyway.”

It did feel good that he was worried, even if it was because you were his friend, it still was nice to know that he did care so much. You could imagine if it had been Sasha or Connie he would have yelled at them, called them idiots but with you, he didn’t. He’d been a little different towards you since you stood at his house together. He was still loud and sometimes obnoxious, but there were times when he let himself be quiet and just… exist around you. You still didn’t know exactly how to comfort him but just being around someone seemed to help him usually.

“Yeah well.” Jean put the mat up before looking back at you for a second. His eyes darted away again, looking for something.“You shouldn’t take the risk if you don’t need to.” When he finally found what he was looking for he crossed the room and picked it up, holding it out to you, still not looking.

Your shirt. That was why he wasn’t looking at you, and why he’d been blushing when Mikasa left the room. He’d been checking her out even if she was just dressed for training. Taking it from him you muttered a thanks before turning around. Mostly trying to keep him from seeing the annoyance that was on your face again. The sooner you could get in the shower and ignore everything that had happened these few weeks and pretend these last few minutes didn’t really happen.

Before you could button the shirt Jean grabbed the collar pulling it down. “Shit…” you froze for a second, did it really look that bad? You could only see parts of your back in the mirror. “I can’t believe I didn’t see it coming.” He was good at blaming himself, “You should ice it again.”

Looking over your shoulder you could see a blotch of deep purple on your shoulder, that part wasn’t really healing yet. “It still looks bad?” He gave a small huff when your eyes met. Basically telling you that was a stupid question. “It looks worse than it is. I promise.” Maybe that would make him feel a little better.

His fingers ghosted over your shoulder blade where it probably looked the worst. His fingers slowly trailed towards your spine, you knew he was just looking at your injury but you couldn’t help but close your eyes at his touch. He couldn’t see your face thankfully, you didn’t want him to see the change in your expression as you reveled in his touch, even if it was just the faintest of touches. Before this you didn’t realize how much you really craved touch, maybe it was just his touch?

Goose bumps rose over your skin when his fingers slid down your spine and you turned around again. Your eyes locked and for a moment you thought he was going to say something, he opened his mouth but closed it quickly and let his hand fall and stepped back. You felt your own face heat up when he stepped back and you realized you were basically standing in front of him half dressed.

“Just… be careful okay? What would you have done if you’d have been hurt worse? We need you.” He looked away from you as you buttoned your shirt. “And make sure you sleep soon, you look exhausted.”

A laugh bubbled up out of your chest and he turned sharply. “Yes sir” When you gave him a half attempted salute he rolled his eyes and started walking away from you. “It was funny Jean.” The laughter had hurt your chest though and he wasn’t wrong about you being tired. “You should sleep too, Connie will probably try to wake you up in the morning when he leaves. I know Sasha will wake me up.”

You both knew you were right, they’d never leave without saying anything to both Jean and yourself. He waved and muttered a goodnight before you stepped into your dorm to grab a change of clothes for the shower. Jean already gone when you came back out.

#jean kirstein #jean kirschtien #jean kirstein x reader #jean kirschtein x reader #aot x reader #attack on titan #jean kirschtein imagine #my writing #late nights #mine #my fics

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shadow-assassin-blix · 3 years

Text

Bleeding Sunshine

Javier Pena x Reader

Part 1.

So... this was a challenge... to write Consensual non-consent... but then this icky thing called feelings got in the way, so now this is 2 parts.

So theres gonna be: Spanking. Slight jealously. Insecurities. Javi being both rough and soft. You being a brat at times. Feelings getting talked about. Hands tied.

Got the title from this poem that I found forever ago.

It had been a long day of work with the DEA. They had almost caught La Quica and he just barely slipped from their grasps. Your partner and boyfriend, Javier Pena, had left early, leaving you and Steve with the paperwork. Again.

“Did Javi tell you why he decided to cut early and leave us with the paperwork?” Steve asked, filing away his stack.

“Nope. But is it really that odd for him to leave early?” You replied with a shrug, as you stood up, throwing on your jacket.

“I have to stop and pick up dinner for us tonight, tell Connie I said ‘Hi.’ See ya tomorrow,” You said with a wave as you left the office.

You hopped into your car and drove to a local pizza place and picked up 2 large pizzas. Javi tended to devour most of a pizza pie by himself, leaving you with only one slice far too often.

Once the pizza was ready, it was a fairly short distance to the Embassy apartments. While you had your own apartment, you spent a vast majority of your time in Javi’s once the two of you began dating a year ago.

While dating him was amazing most of the time, there were times that you were doubtful and didn’t believe this relationship would last long. For example, you still had to deal with the issue of his informants and while you weren’t necessarily happy with the arrangement, you also knew that it was for the job. You dealt with it, even though you hated it.

You made your way to his apartment and used your spare key to open his door. You stopped in your tracks when you saw him.

“Please. Please, do not tell me you cut out early just to go fuck a hooker?” You asked, slightly annoyed taking in his appearance.

He sat on his loveseat, wearing nothing but a pair of jeans, a cigarette hanging between his fingers. The Look as you once called it, when your relationship began.

“No. Don’t get your panties in such a twist,” Javier grumbled, tapping the cigarette ash off into the tray on the side table.

Your eyes narrowed at him slightly, as you walked past him, to set the food on the kitchen table.

You began to grab plates and such when Javier called for your attention and waved you over to him.

You looked at him as you slowly walked back over to him and stood before him.

He patted his lap, enticingly, silently asking you to take a seat.

“Mh. No. I hate this couch. I know what you do on it,” You respond, crinkling your nose in slight disgust.

He sighed loudly and commanded, “Get. On. My. Damn. Lap.”

You raised an eyebrow at that, but did as he wished, wondering where this was heading.

You straddle his hips and gently situate yourself on his lap.

“You remember your safe word?” he whispered to you as he took his last drag of his cigarette, before putting it out.

“…mangos? What are we?” You asked slightly confused as to where this was heading.

He then proceeded to reach up and rip your shirt straight down the middle, buttons flying everywhere.

“Javi! I just bought that!” You exclaimed, smacking his chest with the back of your hand.

“Hm. Don’t care. I’ll buy you a new one,” He offered carelessly as he began to kiss your neck, nipping lightly.

You rolled your eyes at his response, and said, “How? It was limited.”

“Shut up, querida,” He mumbled into your neck as his hands ripped the rest of your blouse off, throwing it somewhere.

“Javi. The pizza’s going to get cold,” You complained as he began to unbutton your pants.

“That’s why they invented the microwave, sweet cheeks. Now. Imma tell you one last time,” He growled as he grabbed your chin to look him in the eyes. “Shut. Up.”

You blinked in response and opened your mouth to say something else, but Javi decided to land a firm slap on your ass.

He raised an eyebrow, daring you to react, as his hand hovered near your backside, threatening to do it again.

You took that challenge, and stood up, turning toward the kitchen and to go eat.

Javier shook his head and grabbed you by the back of your pants, pulling you back.

“Oh? Going to be a brat, eh?” He said, disapproval lacing his tone. “Hm. Let me see if I can beat that out of you. Undress.”

You crossed your arms and looked away, ignoring him.

He sighed then and scooted forward a bit, looking up at you with annoyance.

He then proceeded to rip off his belt, twisting you around, and tied your hands together.

“Javi!” You exclaimed, wiggling your arms and hands, trying to break free.

He ripped your pants down, gently guiding you to bend over, and he commanded, “Count them out.”

He spanked you harshly and waited.

“One,” You whispered, not wanting to admit that this was turning you on. You always enjoyed it when he was rougher in bed. Made it more exciting; the mind-blowing orgasms were a plus.

“Louder,” He corrected you, slapping your ass again.

“Two,” You said louder, breathing getting heavier as arousal began to flood your mind.

This continued on until you reached 10 finally, and his hands softly soothed over the enflamed skin.

“Now. Are we going to be a good girl? Or are you going to continue being a brat?” He questioned lightly.

You whimpered in response, trying to calm yourself as both pain and pleasure saturated your brain.

“What was that?” He asked turning you back to him.

You took some deep breaths, in an attempt to get yourself under control.

After a moment you jokingly narrow your eyes at him and let out a breathy, “Ow.”

He chuckled, gently bringing you back to his lap. “I didn’t hear you complaining. In fact, I bet if I were to touch your panties they’d be soaked.”

His hands began massaging your thighs as he lightly pressed kisses to your chest. This usually made you want to be brattier or just give into his ministrations. However, for whatever reason, you were suddenly not as into this as you were a moment ago. Especially when you saw out of the corner of your eye, an old cigarette butt that had lipstick stains on it; you didn’t smoke.

You stared down at his short messy curls, biting your lips, thinking.

‘Why is this man with me? I’m such a mess. I mean why else would he still be seeing his favorites from the brothel? He clearly doesn’t want-‘

“I can hear you thinking. What’s up?” He asked pulling away, one of his hands cupping your face.

You opened your mouth to answer but found you didn’t know what to say, so you closed it.

Javier stared at you for a long moment and noticed the small glances to the ashtray you made. His eyes briefly roved over to it and realized what it was you were looking at.

“Does the thought of me being with a hooker bother you that much?” He guessed, his voice low, his movements stopping.

You don’t answer immediately. You chewed on your bottom lip harshly before sighing heavily.

“I understand… that you do it for work… but it also makes me wonder why you even bother to be with me, when you have all of them,” You admitted.

“What if…. What if I told you… that I haven’t slept with any of them… in months? That I’ve just been paying them for their information?” He hesitantly asked.

“Wh- Really? Why?” You stammered in confusion.

“Because I have you,” He answered plainly, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

You looked at him shocked, your mouth dropping open and you fully expected him to say that he was joking. But after a full minute of him just staring at you softly, you knew he wasn’t, which made you smile and look down.

He tilted your chin back up and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips.

“Let’s go eat, yeah?” He offered with a half-smile.

“What happened to the whole ‘that’s what microwaves are for’ thing?” You teased.

“I want your full attention, when I rail you into next week my love. I don’t want there to be any doubts or thoughts that I don’t care about you. Plus, I can hear your stomach growling and it’s quite distracting,” He joked, his hands flying up to protect his face as you grabbed a pillow and whacked him with it.

“You’re such a jerk! I can’t help it! I’m hungry,” You tried to say sternly but kept laughing.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, your forehead resting against his. You wanted to tell him you loved him, but the last time you did that he refused to speak to you for a week. So, you were quiet, and pressed small kisses to his lips.

The sweet moment was ruined when your stomach growled. Loudly. You pulled away, closing your eyes, and scrunching your face up in mild embarrassment.

“So. Pizza? And whatever’s on TV?” You proposed trying to move away from this awkward moment.

“Yeah. Bring me a couple of slices, please?” He politely asked with a chuckle, turning the TV on.

You filled both plates up pizza, grabbed beers for the both of you, and some napkins.

Javier moved from the loveseat to the sofa and you handed him his half, before curling into his side.

“Do you really think Veronique killed Paolo or do you think it was Marie?” You asked as your (and Javi’s, though he would never admit it) favorite telenovela came on.

“It was definitely Veronique. It’s always the spouse,” Javier argued back, taking a sip of beer.

“C’mon. They just had the baby! Marie’s always been jealous of Veronique!” You exclaimed in response, taking a large bite.

“I guess we shall find out then, won't we?” Javier shrugged devouring half a slice in seconds.

The two of you spent the next hour eating and watching the episode.

When it ended you looked at Javi smugly, “I told you so.”

He rolled his eyes playfully and cleaned up the mess they made while eating. He returned to the living room and picked you up, taking you to his bed.

You lightly giggled at the action, shaking your head.

When the both of you were in bed, the lights out, he pulled you close to him. He was on his side and you on your back. He gently brushed your hair out of your face, he whispered something to you then.

Three words that you hadn’t expected. Three words that you had accepted were never going to come from him, at least not in the traditional sense. Hell, he said it so quietly, you could almost have believed that you misheard him.

“I love you.”

You whispered it back, as he kissed you firmly on the lips. He wrapped his arms around you tightly and you turned on your side to do the same, and the both of you fell into a deep sleep. Best sleep the both of you ever had in a long while.

#Javier Pena #javier pena x reader #a whiplash of emotions #was full on prepared to write utter filth #then emotions took the wheel away from hormones #and here we are

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iamnightduchess · 3 years

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Hey Queen, so I was rewatching season 2 of AOT, and obviously, I saw the amazing Reiner and Bertholdt betrayal scene. I couldn’t help but imagine how that scene would play out in the Twilight Blue universe. May I ask for your headcanons of the Twilight Blue universe? I’m also really curious if Mikasa and Reiner would get back together since they teamed up in the manga to defeat Eren. Thanks!

Hello my dear. Thank you so much for the wonderful Ask! Here’s hoping that your weekend has started out great so far. The S2E6 scene is legendary on its own through the nonchalant way Reiner revealed his & Bertolt’s true identity to the Islanders. In the Twilight Blue Universe, it would be a lot more impactful on both Mikasa & Reiner emotionally. The following (super long) headcanon would be what I envision had happened & also, the possibility of them getting back together again in current canon timeline of the manga.

Read on more for your reading pleasure!

ReiKasa Fic AU Headcanon #4

Universe: Twilight Blue (Note: for this headcanon, the epilogue never took place & the only person who is aware of ReiKasa’s secret relationship would be Bertolt. There's some BeruKasa moments too.) Rhythmic muse included in the links below!

Pre-Reveal

* After the end of Twilight Blue, Reiner & Mikasa had been seeing each other in secrecy. Bertolt would frequently and naturally be the one who provides an excuse for Reiner’s occasional disappearances and he’d also be the one who actually help to switch Reiner’s kitchen or laundry duties so they would coincide with Mikasa’s turn making it easier for the couple to sneak in more alone time together.

* Their relationship continues even when they both enlisted with the Survey Corps.

* Mikasa & Reiner have several secret rendezvous spot(s) : i) the library, right at the secluded area of the fitness books section, ii) the nearby forest for an early morning run, iii) the kitchen storage room. When they've been reassigned to the SC's old headquarters, they frequently snuck into an old attic up in one of the older towers.

* Mikasa can be seen staying longer whenever Eren & Armin hung out with Reiner & Bertolt. It never escaped Armin's perceptive observation that Mikasa seemed to be more sociable only around boys like Reiner & Bertolt.

* During one of their secret trysts, Reiner promised to Mikasa that he'd bring her back to his home in the future to introduce her to his family. He even mentioned this in secret to Bertolt, which the latter protested immediately, arguing that Mikasa would have a horrible future in Marley if they ever take her back with the Founder. She would become their POW or worst, a breeder for the military due to her Ackerman blood. Bertolt reminded him that there are no possible future for them together.

* Since they've been keeping their relationship a secret, Reiner still is flirtatious around the other girls, much to Mikasa's envy. But she wasn't openly expressive of her feelings, therefore only Bertolt was able to tell when Mikasa is bothered by Reiner's behavior around the other female cadets.

* Bertolt would be the one to remind Reiner that he's being overboard but when his best friend apparently 'forgotten' that he's dating the top cadet, Bertolt eventually became the person that offers Mikasa the voice of reasoning.

* Reiner's apparent crush on Krista wasn't taken well by Mikasa. Reiner told her that it was all an act so no one would find out about their relationship. But it didn't hurt Mikasa less everytime he tries to flirt with the petite, beautiful girl right in front of her. It also didn't help that all the other cadets had been gossiping about how Reiner & Krista make a perfect couple, much to Ymir's annoyance as well.

* Bertolt began to spend more time with Mikasa alone, where he also shared with her of his secret feelings for Annie. They both bonded over having to keep their true feelings to themselves. At this point, Mikasa had already see Bertolt as a brother figure, just like Eren and Armin. The other cadets, however, began to suspect the nature of Bertolt & Mikasa’s relationship.

* Connie was the one who suggested that Bertolt & Mikasa had been 'tumbling in the hay' during dinner, when they were running late that one time from cleaning the stables. The way they both blushed & kept quiet only stirred up more rumors, much to Jean & Reiner's annoyance. That same night, after their evening roll call, inside that tiny attic space, Reiner, once again, reminded her on why there would be no other men that could make Mikasa feels the way he does. Part of him was being possessive, part of him was jealous.

* One incident where Mikasa fell off a tree and twisted her ankle to help a stray cat, actually almost caused a rift between Reiner & Bertolt. Reiner only then realized that he had hurt Mikasa's feelings the instant he felt envious when he saw Bertolt carrying the injured Mikasa in his arms. Bertolt asked him, "Why would you care about her?", causing Reiner to recognize that he hasn't been fair towards Mikasa ever since they began dating.

* Bertolt had to remind Reiner that they were not supposed to be attached to anyone on that island but they both know that it was already a line they had crossed.

Reveal & RtS “Say Something”

* The day before the emergency discreet meeting with the top SC officers had also been the last time Reiner & Mikasa had been intimate with each other.

* The night Hange revealed the SC's suspicions of the duo's true identity, Mikasa found it difficult to accept & she had secretly been hoping that their suspicions were untrue.

* When their squad arrives in time to rescue Reiner, Bertolt & the others in Utgard Castle, Mikasa had been worried about Reiner's injury but the way Reiner & Bertolt had been avoiding her gaze somehow confirms her worst fear.

* On top of Wall Rose, Mikasa had been dreading the moment that they're waiting to apprehend the two of them but Reiner's sudden mental breakdown pushed them all to the point of no return. Her hands had been shaking & she hesitated. Their objective was to apprehend them both for questioning, partly because she desperately wanted to talk to Reiner & to get his explanation.

* To say that Mikasa was disappointed that their suspicions were proven true would be an understatement. She was beyond devastated.

* Mikasa actually only wanted to hold Bertolt down so they could apprehend him. But Reiner pushed her off the wall, and this is because Reiner knew that Bertolt & him had to shift and he didn't want her to be caught in the transformation blast.

* The moment Reiner's psyche reinstates back to his Warrior alter, he had temporarily compartmentalized his existing feelings for Mikasa but his heart wouldn't allow him to do so.

* When the SC were chasing after Reiner, Bertolt & Eren, Reiner's heart ultimately broke the moment he heard Mikasa called him a plague of humanity in vain. His heart bled when he'd heard a Titan grabbed Mikasa & he'd heard her screaming in pain but he had to pretend that he felt nothing when it happened.

* Their relationship was as good as dead at that point and the end of the road for both of them, which was a premature, unspoken decision on both sides.

* The whole time when the SC were present during Hange’s introduction & briefing of the Thunder Spears, Mikasa’s brain had been thinking about Reiner the whole time & her feelings were hurt even worst than before.

* She knew they had no choice but to kill them & it didn’t make it even easier for her. It still hurts her to have to use that last Thunder Spear on him. She was still angry at him the whole time Hange was threatening him to explain about the place he came from, their mission & that mysterious letter for Historia. Never she’d expected that it would be the last time she’d ever see his face.

Post-Reveal “It’s Not Goodbye”

* During her imprisonment for insubordination, Mikasa became depressed not only for the fact she now knew that both Eren & Armin have limited years left of living due to the Curse of Ymir, but it was also because of her guilt towards having to watch Bertolt being eaten alive by Armin’s raw titan form and also for a fact that Reiner would also be dying before Eren does.

* When Eren & Armin went to Reiner & Bertolt’s old room to clear their remaining possessions, it was Armin who told Mikasa that he’d kept them in the old attic instead of throwing them away. Mikasa kept Reiner’s old shirt that still has his scent on it from the storage & actually hid it under her pillow. It helped her through her difficult nights.

Time-Skip (Current Canon Timeline) “Love Story” | “Tainted”

* Within that four years, they both had never stopped thinking about the other. It hurts Reiner so badly that he couldn’t allow himself to reminisce all of the beautiful moments he had with Mikasa and could only subconsciously thought of the last moment he’d ever saw her face; her sending an explosive projectile down his Titan’s throat.

* Mikasa had not talked to anyone about Reiner or even once mention his name within that four years. No one knew why she would seclude herself in the attic of one of the headquarters towers every other Saturday.

* Only Sasha knew of Mikasa’s secret relationship years later by accident as during one night, she had overheard Mikasa tossed and turned around in her sleep, calling out for Reiner’s name, her asking why and how could you in her sleep. Mikasa would later wakes up from her nightmare & hides herself in their shared bathroom, crying in the shower.

* The first time she sees Reiner’s Armored Titan again in Liberio, she couldn’t hide the disappointment on her face. She couldn’t even look at Reiner’s direction at all & she realizes that seeing him again still hurts her.

* She was genuinely concerned of Reiner’s safety after the Rumbling was initiated by Eren. Later on, when they were reunited through the Marley-Paradis alliance, all those old memories came flooding back. They both had grown physically & mentally older but the love, it has always been there. The moment she saw his sleeping figure, by gods, she had never known how much she’s been missing him.

* It pained her so much when she saw him being pummeled by Jean because of Marco’s death. Not even once he retaliated or defended himself. She’d never stopped worrying for him the moment he saw him immobilized inside his Titan form at the docks in their confrontation with the Jeagerists. Yet, not even once had she spoken to him directly ever since they were reunited.

* The first time they’ve ever spoken to each other was on the Hizuru steamer en route to Odiha. While Connie was busy tending to the injured Armin in the Medical Bay inside the ship, she helped clean Annie & Reiner’s wounds. “I miss you so damn much.” Were the first words he’d ever spoken to her after four and a half years. She pretended that she didn’t hear him at all.

* She avoided him on the steamer and even when they’re all gathered in the communal area to strategize, she’d spoken to everyone directly, even Annie & Pieck except him. Reiner also saw her observing the conversation Armin was having with Annie on the decks from afar and pulled her into one of secluded hallways to talk & to break the cold silence between them.

* She pushed him away and locked herself inside one of the unoccupied rooms as Reiner knocked on the door from the other side, kneeling and begging for her forgiveness, begging her not to shut him out. Mikasa hated herself even more with every tears that she had shed for both Eren and Reiner.

* Later that night, once they’ve docked in Odiha, Reiner knocked on her door once again to tell her that if tonight is the last night he’d have alive, he just wanted to apologize to her & he just didn’t want to have anymore regrets.

* He begged and he pleaded, “I just wanted to be able to look at you in your eyes and tell you how very sorry I am for all the hurt I’ve caused you and there hasn’t been a day that went by without you on my mind. A part of me died a little bit each day since the day I left Paradis.”

* It took several swings of her fist against his chest, a slap on his cheek and a whispered, “I hate you” from her lips before it met his in a reawakened hunger. Old feelings and sparks reignited between the two former lovers. Inside a tiny bunker room on the Hizuru steam ship, two separated hearts reunited as one once again, so as their bodies.

* Now that Marley is in ruins & her mother is most probably dead, Reiner believes that he no longer has a home to return to. Mikasa disagrees & argues that he still has Gabi and he’d always have a home in her heart. Reiner realizes that if he ever survives their last stand against the Founder in Fort Salta the next day, he’d only wanted to spend the remaining time that he’d still had left alive with Mikasa, raising Gabi & Falco together.

* Right before they both dropped off from the plane to take down Eren’s Founding Titan, Reiner made one last promise to her: he’ll never leave her again & they will both return home together.

---------

I hope you’ve enjoyed the above & thanks again for sending in this fun Ask, @xrocketmanx! Take care & stay safe.

xoxo,

NightD

#ReiKasa #ReiMika #ReiKasa headcanons #asks #textposts #snk headcanons #reiner braun #mikasa ackerman #fic headcanon #fic universe #Twilight Blue #by nightduchess #xrocketmanx #snk rarepair #reinerxmikasa #reiner x mikasa #ReiKasa reimagines #ReiKasa Canonverse AU #ReiKasaverse

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datingintampafails · 3 years

Text

Chapter 25: Jake* Part 3

A Weird Weekend

He is still at his parents’ and is sufficiently drunk, sends me these:

Hindsight 20/20, I see that him saying not to take meeting his mom and step-dad serious didn’t so much mean “it’s not a big deal to them they're chill,” and probably more of a, “I don’t want you thinking this is a monumental step towards a full-fledged relationship.” But back to the story, he sends me a location pin and I head over that way with an overnight bag. At his mom’s place, he stays in a camper that is in their huge backyard, which he calls his “apartment.” This way I knew we would have our own space. At this point, I will be getting there almost at one in the morning, so I don’t really know what to expect.

When I turn onto his mom’s street, I call him as instructed. He comes out of a house and directs me to park by a fence, where I can see their boat over the fence. I’m not sure why he made this out to be so difficult but it’s fine. He walks me into the home and towards the backyard, where they have a beautiful setup. It is a fairy-light decorated area, with a pool, hot tub, patio set, multiple TVs, and a bar. Immediately I am thinking, I could definitely want to hang out here with him in the future. His step-dad has already gone to bed, but his mom did wait for me. Because it is still COVID times, I wave rather than a handshake and say it’s really great to meet her. His mom is truly very gorgeous. She’s wearing glasses but otherwise looks like Connie Britton from American Horror Story, 9-1-1, Nashville, etc. I’m not going to list her whole IMDB for you, you have Google.

After meeting me she says she’s going to bed. His two dogs are running around and being silly. We sit for maybe a couple of minutes before he says he wants to go to sleep too. We walk over to his camper with our phone flashlights on, as I am warned there may be some poop piles in our paths. In the camper are a bunk bed set, a large king-sized bed, a small kitchenette, and a small bathroom. I’m advised that only #1s are allowed in the bathroom there, and otherwise, I would need to go inside. With that in mind, I say I’m going to use the camper bathroom real quick. The sink isn’t working, but I brought hand sanitizer so I just used that to clean my hands afterward.

His one dog is content being alone on the bunk bed, but the younger one must be sleeping with us in the bed. My experience with intoxicated Jake*, very text thus far, is that he is sweet and in touch with his feelings. Today I see a different side of him that honestly, I am not thrilled about.

We are in bed together and he initiates sex, but with the tight corners, it is more tantric than climactic. He again jokes about “good girl” and at one point has his hands on my neck, which I tell him I really don’t like. When we aren’t intertwined, I try to tell him more about my previous abusive relationship, to explain why I don’t like choking in bed. He stops me and says “I don’t want to hear this. It’ll just make me really mad. I’ll want to kill the guy. I’m serious. Like I would drive up to Ohio and kick his ass.” These comments are both kind of sweet that he cares, but also a little scary. On and off with sexual activity, he does upset me once again when he seems disgruntled with my lack of being able to go real hard while I’m on top, “come on…” That irritates me to the point that I more or less give up and turn away from him, laying on my side. I’m for whatever reason sensitive and tear up a little.

We talk about other stuff and it makes me feel better. All along, his dog is still in bed with us, just curled up and sleeping, he is closer to me than Jake*. Finally, we decide to actually attempt falling asleep. At around 4 in the morning, maybe an hour or so after we decided to go to bed, the dog that was in the bed is doing laps: jumping off the bed, running across the camper, jumping back on the bed, rinse and repeat. Obviously, this activity stirs me. We yell at him more or less to go to bed. Maybe five minutes later, I hear a noise, half-awake, after a few seconds of comprehending the noise, I realize what is going on.

“JAKE* YOUR DOG IS PISSING. YOUR DOG IS PISSING RIGHT NOW!” The dog is next to me standing on the bed, peeing. I scare the dog and the dog jumps off the bed. Jake* now is also yelling at the dog. I grab my phone and turn on the flashlight in the dark camper to see what the damage is. There is pee everywhere. I mean everywhere. Thankfully, I have none on me, but the rest of the bed that was more or less in front of me is soaked, the floor all the way up to the stairs by the door is covered in liquid. My shoes that were by the door have pee on them. My underpants and shorts I had at the foot of the bed have pee on them. The other bunk bed, which apparently the dog had jumped onto while running away, also had piss all over it. Ironically, the only area that didn’t have pee on it was the bathroom.

Jake* makes both of the dogs leave the camper, I grab some paper towels and start trying to get the floor cleaned at least. He is telling me I don’t have to clean and I insist. He grabs the comforter and mattress topper and is making a pile, cursing continuously. At this point, we are just so tired and are speechless otherwise. I complain about pee being on my stuff and ask for a trash bag for me to put my pee covered clothes in, which he hands me. I stand by the door, just staring at Jake*, while he is cussing still and repeating “I’m gonna kill that fucking dog.” At this point, due to the dog running all over the place, there isn’t anywhere for us both to sleep.

“Jake*, you can do whatever you want, but I am going home. You can come with me, let’s just go to sleep and I’ll bring you back in the morning.” He thinks it over and says finally “fuck it yeah let’s go. He can sleep outside I don’t give a fuck.” The other dog, he brings inside, the bad one is still somewhere in the fenced yard. So now slightly after four in the morning, we get in my car and I drive back to my place, about 30 minutes away, so we can finally sleep.

I am quiet the whole way, he keeps on and off cursing and repeating that he’s going to kill his dog. This dog was supposedly his baby, his favorite. I ask him if it’s okay for my dog to sleep with us, reminding him that she is a good girl and wouldn’t do any shenanigans. He is not against all dogs at the moment and agrees she’s a good dog. When we finally get back to my place, I ask that we both at least wash our feet before going to my bed. We wash our feet and I say I’m going to more or less fully shower since I was right by the dog when it started peeing and I feel dirty. He goes to bed without me, and when I walk in it’s him and my dog. He isn’t asleep yet so we cuddle, drifting away to sleep in each others’ arms. I have never slept so well with another man, but then again, we also are absolutely exhausted at this point.

In the morning we wake up, have morning sex three times, I only remember this because I text him about it, and more or less lay in bed until 10. Jake* had texted his mom about what had happened, and she says in the morning that she will take care of it and is amazed at the damage done. He and I decide to go get breakfast. We go to McDonald’s thinking that they still have breakfast, but by the time we get there it’s only lunch. Defeated, I just ask for french fries. We eat back at my place, and his mom comes and picks him up around 11 or so.

We are sitting on the couch together as he is getting up to leave, and we sit together on a manually reclining part of the couch. He goes to close the legs back down, and my ankle apparently is in the way. It gets caught and scrapes the back of my ankle, along my Achilles. I scream out, and he apologizes. I know it was an accident so I just hobble over to my fridge and grab an ice pack for myself. This mistake now has literally left me a literal scar on my ankle, so I will never forget him in a way.

My new car is ready, so I pick it up later that day while he is hanging out with family friends. He sends me lots of pictures of himself. One with an older woman I mistake for his mom, because I have terrible facial recognition, and one of him smoking a cigar. My best friend hits me up and so we decide to hit the town in my new whip, going to Armature works. We discuss food and how Armature Works is too expensive, his words not mine, and gives me alternatives, theoretically:

I didn't hear from him for a couple hours, so I text him again later that night. I’m having issues with charging my car, a hybrid, so I’m picking his brain to figure out solutions. He offers to mess with it when he comes over the next day. At this point I have more or less three home projects for him to help me with, none of which ever get done.

Now it is Sunday! Time for him to cook for me. I mention that at this point we have a yellow heart on snapchat, indicating we are each other’s #1 best friend. I then further explain the emojis of Snapchat.

He mentions again his parents are asking about me. He’s also expressed that he has since forgiven his dog and is back to loving him. Jake* is out on the boat, I am jealous, and gives me step by step progress of him leaving, docking the boat, driving back home, taking a shower, etc.

He responds with a “maybe.” Which is a lie, because he is considering his options of going back to school or joining the army, the latter which I am not thrilled about, because already I care about him deeply and don’t want him to die or be hurt.

He arrives and I get out all of the ingredients needed for our sloppy joes. He is cooking when my mom calls. After discussing what he needs to discuss, she says she wants to talk to him. I put her on speakerphone and he is very kind. She asks him a question that is along the lines of, “Are you sassy?” And he says “Yeah but your daughter is pretty sassy too, but I like it.” He throws his “ma’am”s and makes up for a previous time when she got a less than great exposure to him. I had forgotten when in the timeline this story was, but now I am realizing it happened before this.

~~FLASHBACK STORY!~~

Earlier in the week, one night after work I went to Jake*’s to spend time together. I stuck around for a while then he was saying he wanted pizza and dinner. I needed to make a meal box kit so in the end, we decided that I would go back home, he would go pick up his order from Domino’s, then he would come to my place for us to hang out. He didn’t tell me necessarily when he was on his way from Domino’s I just knew to expect him eventually. My mom calls me and we are chatting for a while. I have my Airpods in. I hear a knock at the door while I’m on the phone and know it is him. I answer the door, “hey!” And what he says, normally 100% I would love and think was totally funny, which granted I still loved and thought it was funny. After my greeting he says “Yeah, uh, I have a delivery for you….. Except it’s not pizza, it’s actually my dick.” I stare at him, half smiling, half mouth agape as I utter, “I’m on the phone with my mom.” He mouths, “oh shit,” and I through laughter ask my mom if she heard him, she did not, but I’m still just laughing and laughing and finally just feel like explaining it to my mom so she doesn’t think I’m crazy. I told her that he had a pizza, and essentially said that the pizza had sausage… except he didn’t say sausage. She kind of chuckles but is like “oh, okay.” At that point I say I have to go and hang up. Jake* is confused like, “why in the world did you tell her,” and my only defense was that it was really funny.

After that, I was cooking, but he actually took over the cooking because I was “relying too much on the recipe” and more or less he thought he could do better. I was all for it, and just stood in the kitchen while he finished cooking my food for me. It was pretty good with the slight improvements he made to the technique, better than it would have been I’m sure. A lady could get used to this…. He apologized briefly for taking over the cooking, but believe me when I say, I was not insulted in the least.

~~Exit Flashback~~

The sloppy joes he makes this night are amazing, we each have two each. And we spend the rest of the night canoodling. Again he leaves, because of his headaches. At this point it is a chronic thing and I feel bad for him, he just always seems miserable when they come on. Continuously, he is having doctors appointments, trying to suss out everything between the infection and the headaches.

#dating #tampabay #tampa #stpete #clearwater #hinge #bumble #tinder #relationships

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hispeculiartreasure · 5 years

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All We’ve Got is Time - Chapter Nine | B.B.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

AU: If They’d Survived/Post-War/Window Washer!Bucky Barnes

Rating: Teen

Word count: 5,500

Chapter 9/24

Warnings: A bad word, a barely-violent bar skirmish

AN: Thank you for patiently awaiting this chapter! This posting schedule is much, much more suitable. You are all so lovely and supportive. Let me know your thoughts on this chapter! And send me an ask if you’d like to be tagged.

Fun fact, the Commando Cocktail was actually on the Stork Club’s drink menu in the late 1940s! It definitely had a more sensuous namesake but I just took an opportunity and ran with it 😉

Chapter Eight

‘All We’ve Got is Time’ Masterlist

First thing in the morning the bullpen is already abuzz with squeals and giggles. The typists of the office huddle around their sweet friend as she holds out her hand, the square cut diamond sparkling in the morning light.

“It’s beautiful, Dorothy. Congratulations,” you purr, squeezing her fingers after perusing the jewelry close-up.

“I’m assuming he asked you in an insanely romantic way?” Millie sighs, chin perched in her hands.

“Yeah, tell us the story!” Frances giggles.

Dorothy settles into her chair, eyes shining. As she begins her tale Suzy leans in to you and whispers, “We’re dropping like flies around here. Alice last week, Dorothy today. And they’re some of the youngest. If you come in next week with a ring I’ll toss you out a window.”

You hide a smile behind your hand. “Relax, Suze. It’s sweet.”

“So sweet my teeth are gonna rot,” she grumbles.

“Cynicism is not a good look on you.”

Suzy huffs and turns a dazzling smile to Dorothy as the remaining girls continue to ask questions. The two of you take steps toward your desk and Suzy sighs deeply. “All of a sudden people are marrying like there’s no tomorrow. Five years ago if people were getting hitched after courting for six months your parents locked you in your room until the vapors wore off.”

“Are you jealous?”

The redhead scoffs. “No, but. . . the change has got me. . .” she twists to you, the cynic having been replaced by someone much more forlorn. “It’s got me feeling like I’m behind, ya know?”

“Aw, Suze.” You take her hand in yours. “I get it. The war changed a lot of things, a lot of people.”

“Yeah. Guess so.” A moment passes before she clears her throat and takes her hand back, smoothing her skirt before she motions to your desk. “You’ve been busting your tail this morning. Why’d you get here early?”

“I’ve got lunch plans. Wanted Flannery to know I wasn’t shirking my job by staying out long. Would you believe she was here when I came in at 7?”

“Lord, does that woman sleep?”

“Unclear.” You both turn to watch the back of Flannery’s head bent over her desk, firmly ignoring the fuss over the engagement ring.

“Well. Hope you have a good lunch.” With a wink and a bounce of curls Suzy is gone.

Your fingers fly over your typewriter as you eye the clock, praying your boss doesn’t approach your desk with a new task before lunchtime. With a record number of letters typed, addressed, and sealed up you leave your swivel-chair spinning when your break begins.

Wicker basket in hand you savor the sunshine on your skin as you walk a few blocks to the building Bucky’s team is currently working on. You round the structure, lifting a hand to shield your eyes against the high sun as you look for your boyfriend among the people hanging off of the skyscraper. It’s almost laughable how much he stands out from the other men in his crew.

Where most of the boys are thin and gangly, Bucky is lean and formidable. His work was neat and efficient, an obvious routine to his movements. While you did enjoy your view from several stories down. . .

Bringing your fingers to your mouth you whistle shrilly, causing every head to swivel down to you. You can’t decipher many of Bucky’s features but you can tell he’s smiling the same dopey smile he’d had after you’d shared that first kiss a few weeks ago.

Around the grin he yells, “What’re you doing here, Sixth Floor?”

“Bringing you lunch, Sergeant! Unless you’d rather me go,” you shout back, tossing a thumb over your shoulder.

“I’ll be right down.” You watch as he slowly descends, breathing a sigh when his feet safely meet the ground.

“Hello, beautiful,” a kiss lands on your cheek while he dries his hands on a towel.

“Hungry?”

“Starving.”

You toss him one end of a thin blanket you’d packed. “I’m assuming you’re not too good for a picnic?”

He catches it with a hum and mirrors your unfolding, settling it to the ground beneath the shade of a tree in the courtyard. “I dunno. My delicate sensibilities may be set off-balance.”

“Are your delicate sensibilities offended by sandwiches and fruit?”

“I think they can be persuaded to cooperate, unless you forgot the coffee.”

“You think I’m stupid?” you say as you pull the thermos out of your basket.

Arranging your skirt to maintain modesty you take a seat on your blanket. Bucky sits near before reclining to rest his weight on his elbow, body turned toward you.

“Today been okay?” you ask as he takes the wrapped sandwich you offer.

“Just like any other day. It’s blazing hot up there; one of the guys almost had a heat stroke.”

“Goodness, I hope you’ve been drinking water.”

His eyes soften as he replies, “Yes ma’am. By the way, I have an appointment with a local job counselor next week.”

“Bucky, that’s fantastic!” you enthuse, grabbing his arm.

“Fingers crossed he can help me figure out how to head towards being a mechanic.”

“I sure hope so. I’m proud of you for reaching out to him. This is a great start.”

Before you can ask why he’s gazing at you adoringly he asks, “How’s work been?”

“Busy. Our business year is almost done so our mail has been stacking up. Plus I’m pretty certain Anderson’s mistress broke up with him: he’s been in an extra testy mood. Oh, and Dorothy got engaged last night.”

“I thought that happened last week?”

“No, that was Alice.”

“Hard to keep it all straight,” Bucky mutters as he guzzles his cup of coffee.

You can’t help a giggle. “That’s exactly what Suzy said. Dorothy seems happy, though.” Bucky only hums in thought.

The next several minutes are quiet, spent enjoying each other’s presence as you people watch and eat.

“Dinner tomorrow?”

“Mhmm,” you hum affirmatively around a mouthful of grape.

You sense a hesitancy in Bucky as he stares at his cookie. After a big gulp he says, “Do ya wanna do drinks after with Steve and Peggy?”

Your stomach drops. “You want me to meet them?”

“I do.”

A million thoughts stampede through your brain in the span of three seconds. This is a big deal. They mean a lot to Bucky. These are his best friends. What if they hate me. What if I’m not good enough, what if one word from them means Bucky never speaks to me again? What if-

“Only say yes if you want to, I don’t wanna pressure you-”

“No no no no,” you blurt, shaking your head. “I want to. It’s just. . .”

“Just what?” Words leave you, an empty silence hanging in their place. “Tell me,” Bucky nudges, hand tangling with yours.

“It’s an intimidating prospect.”

“Because of what they do? Really, they aren’t that big of a deal, just have jobs that-”

“Not intimidating because of who they are. But who they are to you, Bucky.” His eyebrows furrow, so you continue. “Steve has been your lifelong best friend and you’ve been to war and back with Peggy, literally. I’m honored that you want them to meet me but at the same time. . .”

“Wait -” he leans back. “Do you think they aren’t going to like you?”

“There’s always a chance-”

Bucky had the nerve to laugh - not a laugh of derision, but genuine disbelief. “Not a chance in the world. Steve knows you’re special. He knows me better than I know myself, he’s seen how I’ve been since you. And Peggy. . . she may be a harder sell. But that’s got nothing to do with you. It’ll go fine. Okay?” And with his fingers running up and down your arm, who are you to question him?

“Okay.” You shove half a cookie in your mouth to stave off the urgent impulse to run away.

------

“They’re late because they already hate me right?”

Bucky scoffs, leaning his elbows onto the table in the back of the club. “How can they hate you when they don’t even know you? I already told you, Steve called before I left to pick you up. Something popped up at work and a meeting was going to run long. They should be done right about-” he checks his watch, “-now. They’ll be here soon. But to me it sounds like you’re complaining about getting extra time with me.”

You shove at his arm and grumble, “Oh shush.” All he does is chuckle. The band playing loudly from the corner does little to calm your nerves. Every few minutes you pat down your hair for flyways and make sure your dress isn’t wrinkled. You twirl the ring on your right hand over and over before Bucky’s hand stops your fidgeting with a gentle touch.

“You okay? I’ve never seen you like this before.”

“Just because I may always seem confident doesn’t mean I am. Few people get to see me with the jitters.” You slant your eyes to his. “Consider it an honor of yours.”

He opens his mouth to presumably soothe you before something over your shoulder catches his attention. “There he is.” You turn as Bucky stands to greet Captain Steven Rogers and suddenly you understand why Connie is such a fan.

You’d seen the posters and pictures of him in uniform but seeing him sport a suit and tie was another ball game. Somehow his golden hair shines bright under the dull lighting which also cast a beautiful shadow across his broad shoulders. He seems impossibly taller with every purposeful step to your table, jaw set in a firm line.

But then the biggest smile washes across his face as he steps into Bucky for a hug. As men do, they pat each other on the back and part - suddenly Steve’s attention is all on you. Blue eyes so similar to Bucky’s grow warm.

“It is so nice to finally meet you,” he offers his hand. “You’re all he’s been talking about.”

You laugh and grasp his hand, introducing yourself. You glance to Bucky, worrying he’d be bothered by the admission of him discussing you. He’s remarkably at ease, shoulders dropped, face relaxed.

“Where’s Peggy?” Bucky asks.

Steve gestures dramatically as the three of you take your seats. “She was pulled aside for a private meeting on our way out the door. But she shouldn’t be too long.”

“Never thought you’d be the one in a relationship with work-life balance,” Bucky jabs.

“And you never miss an opportunity to badger me about my work.”

“Yes, I’ve heard you two are quite the pair,” you look between the two men.

Steve raises an eyebrow. “Oh, we’ve got some stories.” As he dives into a story involving a rock mysteriously hurtling through the window of the Barnes’ family home you can’t help but be a bit shocked.

His presence commands attention but his demeanor is overtly disarming, daresay gentle. With a boy-ish charm he animatedly tells the story, strongly disagreeing with Bucky’s adjustment of details. You were expecting a hardened war hero, rough and tumble with scars to show for it. This extremely young man was the last thing you were expecting to walk through the door. You feel a peace settle over you as the men tell their childhood story in tandem.

Bucky gives you a moment of eye contact and his lips twitch to a smile. Not so bad right?

The delightful verbal sparring is interrupted by three giggling women - well, girls. They bounce up to the table, looking barely old enough to be allowed into the bar. Gushing about Captain America this, Howling Commandos that, they talk over each other getting louder by the moment. Steve smiles tight and you take note of how much his posture has shifted. Shoulders squared back, adjusting his tie every few moments. Several autographs later the women are finally guided back to their table by a helpful waitress.

Viscerally experiencing a shift between Captain Rogers to Steve to Captain America had you reeling. Seems the duty of being America’s Golden Boy came with some steep costs. Minutes later the same waitress reappears, apologetically placing a drink to your table.

“A Commando cocktail for you sir, from the same three ladies.” Steve sighs and pushes the drink to the middle of the table, decidedly ignoring the eager glances of the gaggle of girls across the room. “May I refresh anyone’s beverage?”

“I’ll have a Sidecar and she,” Steve points to the empty seat next to him, “will have a whiskey, neat.”

“Make that two,” Bucky adds.

You indicate that you’re still working on your first before eyeing the gifted drink between you. “The Commando cocktail. . . did your special ops team have a drink named in your honor?” you ask, perplexed.

Bucky moves his head from side to side. “Could be us. Could have a different meaning. I hope to God it’s not us, you’d think someone would have the decency not to mix bourbon and absinthe in our honor.”

Steve changes the subject to avoid any more embarrassment on his part. “I hear you’re a mechanic,” he leans in with interest.

“Was,” you correct. “Now I’m just a secretary.”

“A typist,” Bucky corrects you in turn. “And I’d say your skills are still pretty up-to-date.”

“Updated enough to do a house call? My Harley’s been making a funny noise, maybe you’d be able to fix it,” Steve says with a chuckle.

“I’d love to take a look at it. Is it high-pitched or low? The vibrations in motorcycles tend to knock the batteries dead fast.”

Steve does his best to smother how impressed he is behind his drink.

“Don’t know what good fixing it will do ya Steve, you’re just going to end up throwing it at something again,” Bucky scolds as he takes his own sip.

“Doing. . . throwing. . . what?” You ask.

Steve blushes, moving to answer when Bucky interrupts him. “This guy has thrown more bikes at enemies than days I spent as a POW. Just ‘cause you’re strong enough to toss ‘em doesn’t mean you should, pal.”

A clipped British accent floats over your table. “Don’t tell me you two are at it again over those motorbikes.”

You turn toward the voice and realize you had not known the definition of intimidation until you’d seen Peggy Carter. She almost perfectly matches Steve’s earlier confident stride except for the click of her heels. After a full day of work her makeup was flawless, accompanied by chestnut hair curled to perfection. High-waisted trousers followed a perfect line to her feet - paired with her simple white blouse and she was one of the most stunning women you’d ever laid eyes on.

The three of you stand as she arrives at the table. “Bucky, always lovely to see you,” she gives him a brief hug before turning on her heel to face you. There’s a sharpness to her gaze as she quickly looks you up and down. “Peggy Carter, pleased to finally meet you.” The handshake you share is firm, inspecting. Just like that, every defense you’d relaxed with Steve was right back in place.

“It’s really nice to meet you, Peggy.” She nods once and narrows her eyes slightly before turning to Steve.

“Hello, darling,” she hums to him with a subtle touch to his arm.

“Did your meeting go okay? Looked intense,” Steve pulls Peggy’s chair out for her before she sits and Bucky does the same for you.

“Bureaucratic nonsense, I’m afraid. I’ll fill you in later,” brown eyes cut to you and Bucky before giving a miniscule shake of her head. “Now what were we discussing?”

“We were talking about the ace mechanic at the table.” Was that a hint of a brag you heard in Bucky’s voice?

“Ah, yes. I heard of your time working in the factory. Do tell us more,” Peggy says breezily before sipping her whiskey.

You share the same story you’d shared with Bucky on your first date - though slightly less eloquently. While Steve reacts encouragingly and asks questions, Peggy sits in relative silence. Every time you turn her way, she’s watching you. Anyone passing by the table would just see someone listening; you could see the analysis rolling through her mind.

Once the conversation shifts you feel a warm hand gently resting on your knee for the briefest of moments. A sweet, It’s okay gesture from Bucky while he reminisced of their days overseas. Mere weeks into this and he could already read you like a book. Then again, reading each other was what started this whole thing, wasn’t it?

“. . . don’t you think?”

The awkward silence prompts you to shake out of your thoughts and glance around the table, everyone looking at you expectantly.

“I’m sorry, say again?”

Peggy drains her glass before setting her steeled gaze on you. “I was just observing that working with some men can tend to be draining. Have you shared that experience?”

You nod, choosing your words carefully - just as carefully as the question had been posed.

“I believe some men have difficulty accepting that a woman might be more knowledgeable in their field, due to their own presuppositions. I had hoped the way women stepped up to work during the war would have been celebrated but it only seems to have threatened the men that came back. I do hope that changes over time.”

She hums and adds a small, “Indeed” while Steve gives a sympathetic smile. “And how did you come to find out about Bucky’s war record?” The suspicion in her voice is minute, but still detectable.

“He had mentioned serving in Europe on our first date, so I knew he was a veteran. I didn’t find out about the. . . special operations until about a week later. One of my coworkers put two and two together when Bucky visited work one day and spilled the beans.”

Bucky grins in Steve’s direction. “She’s a big fan of yours, Stevie. Practically said she’d marry you on the spot.” Once again, Steve’s cheek dust pink.

“For which I apologized to Bucky for. It was mortifying. And unfair to have that reveal sprung on Bucky with no warning.”

“It’s not a big deal,” Bucky insists, hand finding yours under the table.

Abruptly Peggy stands, prompting the two boys to jump to their feet. “I’m going to powder my nose. Would you like to join me?” she directs your way.

“Umm. . .” Bucky catches the hint of panic in your eye and tilts his head. What’s the worst she can do? “Sure. Could use some freshening up myself.”

“Lovely. Excuse us, boys.” Peggy leads the way through the clusters of people, past the bar to the restroom. The door clicks behind you and you’re afraid Peggy will be able to hear how fast your heart is beating. She rummages through her handbag for a moment before settling herself in front of the mirror. You take a position to her right, utilizing the other half of the mirror.

Uncapping a tube of lipstick Peggy expertly applies a fresh coat to her already rose-petal-red lips. Even the way she applied makeup was daunting. And you can’t shake the feeling that she’s waiting for you to speak first.

You clear your throat as you brush your fingers through your hair. “Thank you for taking the time to meet us tonight. I know how important you and Steve are to Bucky.”

“Hmm, yes, it’s our pleasure. They are very important to me as well. Both of them.”

Oh boy.

“The three of us have been through a war together, after all. You don’t come out of that without feeling a certain level of loyalty. I believe Steve and I share a concern for Bucky’s wellbeing.”

“Have I done something to make you particularly suspicious of me?”

As she turns to you, her softened features take you by surprise. “Whether he admits it or not, Bucky is an attractive, semi-notable public figure who happens to be attached to an extremely public figure. I wouldn’t put it past a woman to use Bucky to try to get close to Steve. Girls have tried before.” She checks one pin behind her ear before stepping to the door again.

You blink several times before responding. “And you think I’m one of those girls?”

“Not anymore.” She takes a few steps back to you. “My main concern for him now is the fact that he’s. . . in a vulnerable place. The war left many soldiers trying to find their footing. I want to make sure he doesn’t get tipped over in the process. I’d hate for him to feel any unnecessary pain if I could have headed it off from the start.”

“I. . . I do care for him, Peggy.” You face your reflection again, hands resting on the sink. “I had absolutely no intention of becoming romantically involved with someone. And then he was so kind to me in an environment where men have been. . . less than kind. Everything I learn about him draws me in closer. The last thing I want to do is be a source of pain or volatility.”

With a shaky breath you search for eye contact again, finding a new warmth emanating from hers.

“Well, I suppose we can work with that,” she offers as she opens the door. The tense air shifts and you give a small smile as you pass through the door and begin to follow her back to the table.

You are just stepping around the bar when a feminine “That’s okay, really. . .” catches your attention. Following the voice, your attention is drawn to a young couple standing by the bartop. Although every moment they were starting to look less like a couple and more like a man with wandering hands. The girl tries to step back which only results in his meaty hand fisting into the side of her dress and pulling her chest to his. Based on her expression what the man had to say was less than proper. She struggles to step out of his grip which only seems to tighten the more she wiggles.

You’ve had enough of that.

You detour from the route you and Peggy had set toward the table. Peggy picks up on your absence and turns to watch you curiously.

“Excuse me,” you state more than ask. One pair of panicked eyes and another pair of glazed-over ones come to rest on your face. “Is everything alright here?”

“Ev’things swell, sweet dish. We’s just having a lil talk.”

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

“Is that true, Miss?”

“Um, I- I’m-” she attempts to squeak out before the man bellows again.

“Was my word not good enough for you? You tryin’ ta grandstand your feminine chops for some cool cat?”

“I was speaking to Miss-” you turn expectantly towards the girl who’s looking younger by the minute.

“Cartwright. Helen,” she whispers.

“I was speaking to Miss Cartwright so if you’d please take a step back, sir.”

“I don’t gotta do nothin’ you tell me to.” You pull Helen behind you which only makes the man more belligerent. He starts yelling less-than-appropriate words and soon his anger rounds on you.

Drawing up to your full height you stare the man dead in the eye. “Is this the way you treat all women? Or just the ones smaller than you?”

A giant hand wraps itself around your forearm, jerking you towards him. “Now listen here bitch, I-” Before he can finish his drunken thought, perfectly manicured fingers clutch his wrist. He’s violently pulled away from you, arm pinned behind his back - his face making intimate contact with the bartop.

“Now now,” Peggy coos. “That’s no way to treat friends of mine. Seems like you need a moment to cool down.” The brute strains against Peggy’s grip, a foot kicking back every so often. You land a spiked heel directly to the top of one of his feet, digging in for good measure when his howl of pain can be heard over the tune of the band. “Thank you for that, dear,” Peggy says, clearly enjoying the situation. A scuffle is heard behind you but you’re too focused on making sure the boar doesn’t hurt Peggy to pay it much mind.

“Looks like you two have things handled, but could I be of assistance?” Steve strides next to you, honeyed voice contrasting sharply with his stern gaze.

Peggy blows a puff of air at a curl that had fallen in front of her eyes. “Would you mind escorting this gentleman to the curb? I believe fresh air is in order.”

“My pleasure.” With the back of his collar fisted in Steve’s hand the bully has no choice but to have his face unceremoniously unstuck from the bar and pushed toward a back entrance. Peggy follows closely, speaking in the man’s ear the whole way out, waving off a pair of security guards.

You can feel Bucky’s presence but turn your attention to the now-shaking young woman, bringing your hands up to her arms. “Helen, are you okay? Did he hurt you?”

She shakes her head. Tears hang stubbornly in her eyes, fighting not to show how shaken she really was over the ordeal.

“I’m sorry he put his hands on you. Do you have anyone you can call?” She nods, reaching for the purse hanging off of her wrist. “That’s great.” Your eyes drift to Helen’s waist. “Oh dear. Looks like you didn’t make it completely unscathed.”

Helen’s gaze follows yours before she lets out a dismayed sigh. “I just picked this dress up from the cleaner’s yesterday.” She fingers the ripped fabric of her dress. Now tears are flowing freely.

“It’s only ripped on the seam, that can be fixed in a jiffy.” You look over your shoulder at Bucky and ask him to retrieve your light coat from the table. He’s gone and back in a flash and you drape it over Helen’s shoulders. “Take this to cover up on your way home. Let me find a pen and paper and I can write down the information for my favorite seamstress in the city. Her prices are fair and her work is solid.” A scrap of paper and a pencil are produced from your purse and you add your information at the bottom. “In case you need anything else while you’re in the city,” you explain as you hand the note over.

“How can I get your coat back to you?” Helen asks as she buttons it closed.

“Don’t worry about it,” you dismiss. “It’s almost summer and I was due for a new jacket anyway. Just stay safe, okay?” You wipe a few leftover tears from her face and nod in encouragement as she heads to the phone booth by the entrance.

“Are you alright?” Suddenly you’re hyper-aware of Bucky’s close proximity, his hand gently raising up your forearm toward a lamp on the bar.

“Um, I think so. He grabbed me pretty good but it shouldn’t be too bad.” You rub the area the drunk had gripped and hiss softly at the tenderness of your skin. “It’ll heal.”

“I guess I don’t need to tell you that was incredibly stupid?” Bucky attempts to sound nonchalant but the slight edge to his voice gives him away.

“Probably not. But it’s better this than something even worse happening to Helen because I ignored it.”

“My God, there’s another one of him.” You both face a newly arrived Peggy who is taming her curls, Steve not too far behind.

Bucky grumbles, “Evidently.”

“That took an exciting turn. What say we cut a rug to forget that jerk?” Steve steps to your side. “May I have the honor, ma’am?” He asks, offering a hand to you.

“Me? Oh, sure.” You settle your hand in his lightly, looking to Bucky for his confirmation. He quirks his mouth to one side, nods subtly. He’s harmless.

As Steve gives you a simple twirl onto the dance floor you notice Peggy in Bucky’s arms a few couples away and you can’t help but wonder what they’re discussing. As you and Steve move around the room Peggy speaks steadily, Bucky hanging onto every word.

“You alright?” Steve’s deep voice snaps your attention back to him. He’s watching you empathetically.

“Just been a bit of a rockier night than I expected,” you say with a half-hearted chuckle. You catch yourself relaxing in Steve’s arms - not the way you did in Bucky’s, obviously. But there was still a soothing sense of security coming off of Steve in waves. “I pictured this going much differently.”

He breathes a laugh as he spins you out and brings you back in. “It’s going about as I expected, except I wasn’t the one causing trouble tonight. Thanks for that.”

A genuine smile breaks your sobriety. “Just hope it didn’t ruin yours and Peggy’s opinions of me.”

“Hardly!” he says with glee. “I already knew I would like you and the bit at the bar probably sealed the deal for Peg.”

“Really? Because I got the feeling she isn’t my biggest fan.”

“Ah, she’s just protective and tough. The first time she got really angry with me she grabbed the nearest pistol and fired four shots at me.” Steve laughs at how comically wide your eyes grow. “I deserved it. But there’s a lot of love and care beneath the cool gazes and harsh tone.” He catches your eye and clears his throat. “Although I’m not the one who told you that,” he whispers conspiratorially.

A grin overtakes your face. “Thanks for that. Makes me feel a little better.”

“You’ve got nothing to worry about. It’s driving you crazy not being able to hear what they’re talking about right now, huh?”

You sigh, the pair of you circling around where Bucky and Peggy are in both your sights. “You’re not wrong.”

“Did Bucky ever tell you the specific effects the serum had on me?”

“Made you super strong, super fast? That’s the gist of what I got.”

“To accompany that, all my senses are heightened. I can smell my favorite bakery across the city, can read signs a mile or two away. And,” he looks down at you mischievously, “I can hear just about every conversation in this room.”

“You can? That has to be insanely overwhelming.”

“It was for the first few months. Then I learned how to tune certain things in and out. You wanna eavesdrop with me?”

You shake your head, “Oh, I don’t-umm, I’d hate to pry.”

“You don’t have to. I’m going to.” Oh, you really like Steve.

Steve turns you so he has a clear view of his best friends and seems to focus intently beyond your shoulder.

“Peggy said something about being careful how quickly he moves forward with you. Bucky just asked Peggy why she was trying to scare you away earlier. She says she was testing your resolve, which stood up better than she expected,” he spares a glance to you, “Bravo to you on that. Peggy says she admired your action with the young woman at the bar. Bucky’s not surprised that you stepped in when there was trouble . . and now they’re just talking shit about me, which is their usual topic of discussion. Did that help?”

“It did. Thank you, Steve.”

“Anytime.”

Quiet follows for a few bars of the song, your brain mulling over the whole night.

After another turn Steve asks, “You haven’t met the family yet, right?”

“Right. Bucky’s dodged the subject more than once. I haven’t pushed it.”

Steve grimaces. “I can’t really blame him. I love the Barneses like they’re my own, but they can be overwhelming sometimes.”

“So I’ve gathered. Honestly, all I know is that he has three sisters and that was only shared in a few asides.”

“Three sisters, all younger. Becca, Rose, and Evelyn. He’s close to his Ma and Becca. Him and Rose don’t have many issues, mostly because they never spent a lot of time together. Things with Evelyn are strained because she’s turning into an adult and Bucky is having a hard time letting her. And his father. . .” Steve weighs his words. “His father is old-fashioned and always will be. They don’t get along.”

“Sounds like that’ll be a fun meeting.”

“When the time comes, you’ll do great.” Steve was so earnest in his reassurance you couldn’t help but believe him.

“May I cut in?” you turn to Bucky’s voice, glad to see him smiling.

“Only if you trade for this gorgeous partner of yours,” Steve teases, mocking a bow to Peggy.

“Oh sod off,” she scolds as Steve pulls her close while the band begins playing a new song.

You nestle into Bucky’s side with a hand tucked in his, relishing in the ease of a moment alone together.

“You good?” Bucky whispers when the song has almost come to an end.

Pulling back, you match his amorous gaze. “Yeah. I’m good.” A soft kiss meets your temple and you practically melt further into Bucky.

“Thanks for coming tonight.”

“Thanks for asking me.”

“Try not to be too much trouble next time, huh?”

“No promises, Barnes.”

Chapter Ten

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#Bucky Barnes x Reader #Bucky Barnes Reader Insert #1940s Bucky Barnes #Bucky Barnes Series #Bucky Barnes x You #All We've Got is Time #Chapter Nine #beka writes #marvel fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfiction

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sonderlivra · 5 years

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Jeankasa please ! But with Eren realizing he was indeed in love with her and is really really salty and jealous 😅 Thanks u !

Hii anon! Thank you so much for sending this amazing request in, and sorry for taking so long! Going from the emoji, I think you probably had a fun, teenage rivalry thing in mind?? Tell that to my f-ed up brain because what it came up with is a canonverse angst fest, I’M SO SORRY this is why I can’t have nice things

Canonverse, manga spoilers post chapter uhhh.. the 100′s? Happens during the timeskip.

~3200 words

Again, I’m sorry

—

He’s so used to the steam by now he barely feels it. It’s not even like actual steam, which leaves skin and clothing moist even after it’s gone. Though he supposes it would be nice to have damp clothes for once. The sun is unforgiving in the summer.

He makes his way up the rocky shore, where two people wait for him. This time it’s Jean’s turn, who waits for him patiently. Eren thinks back to their stupid arguments when they were in training. They seem so mundane and faraway now, even though it’s been just about a year since they graduated.

Jean reaches forward to help him over the last rock, but Mikasa, as always, gets there first. As he grabs her hand, Eren observes her closely. Her cheeks have filled out, and she looks stronger, like the Mikasa of old. The thought makes him smile. “Thanks, Mikasa.”

Mikasa gives him a rare smile back, and the three of them make their way back to camp together.

“How many this time?” Eren asks.

“Twenty three, I think.” Jean says. “They were still rounding them up.”

“Let’s hope this lot isn’t as difficult as the last one.” Eren remarks.

“Let’s hope we don’t have to use your Titan form next time,” Mikasa mutters.

“I don’t mind,” Eren starts, but Jean says, his tone more soothing, “Well, Yelena and Onyankopon are getting better at convincing them. Maybe it’ll work next time.”

To his surprise, Mikasa is smiling. “Maybe.”

They are quiet then, but something about the conversation has bothered Eren, like an itch in his brain.

“You’ve put on weight,” Eren observes, and Mikasa glances at him. Jean actually raises his eyebrows, and Eren suddenly realises what a stupid thing he’s said.

“That’s good!” He explains hurriedly. “It’s healthy! I’m glad, I mean. For you.”

“No point in weakening myself.” Mikasa, to his relief, doesn’t look offended. Of course she doesn’t. It’s Mikasa. He doesn’t know why he was worried in the first place.

“Told you the new diet would help,” Jean nudges her shoulder with his.

“You did.” There is an amused twist to her mouth.

“So you admit that I was right?”

Mikasa rolls her eyes, but her lips twitch into a smile once again. “You were right, Jean.”

“Mark the hour and praise the walls!” Jean gasps dramatically. “A miracle, indeed!”

“Oh, shut up.” Mikasa’s smile actually widens.

Sasha comes running up to them, and Jean sweeps her into the discussion, which Sasha makes even more dramatic with her own exaggerations. Feeling very out of place all of a sudden, Eren turns away and leaves them. When he is far enough away, he glances back at his friends, and finds Mikasa watching him.

He makes himself turn away again.

For the first time in their walled history, the majority of a graduating trainee batch opt to join the Survey Corps. The numbers are welcome, and unsurprisingly, all of Eren’s surviving comrades from the 104th (save Armin) are promoted and are assigned teams.

Jean and Mikasa are natural leaders, and Sasha and Connie are not much worse. Eren watches the four of them every morning: the Team Leaders start earlier than him, and his training exercises are limited enough that he has time to observe the others. In the year since they graduated, they’ve all improved so vastly. Connie is more decisive in his movements, Sasha is quicker and lighter on her feet, Jean’s aim is bordering on scary, and Mikasa-

Mikasa-

She is glorious, as always. Sometimes, she flies so fast, you barely see her move from one position to the next. Other times, she is a deadly presence on the field, with unerring aim, unchanging strength, unmistakable in her magnificence. Eren’s eyes are drawn to her all the time, and he feels a jolt of thrill in his chest everytime she moves on the training ground.

Presently, he watches her perform her signature move -a smooth, clean cut with two blades, and a large chunk of fake Titan nape crashes to the ground. The new recruits had been cheering the others during their demonstrations, but now, they are utterly silent. Eren understands, knows that cheers and clapping could barely begin to convey the awe at watching Mikasa fly.

Jean is now saying something, waving his hands to emphasise his point. He makes Mikasa repeat one of her flying spins, and then he takes to the air, and… he does it, too. Not quite like her, not with the same grace and precise movements, but he does it.

The recruits are cheering again, and Eren feels a sudden catch in his breath.

There is a quick, firm knock, and his bedroom door opens.

“Hey,” Armin greets him, his smile not reaching his eyes. “Ready to go?”

Eren slips off the window sill. “Yeah.”

He glances at his 3DMG gear lying on one of the shelves, gathering dust now.

He’ll return it to Supplies tomorrow.

“Wow, the new kids are loud,” Jean grumbles, frowning over his stew. “Were we ever that bad?”

Connie lets out a bark of laughter. “Jean, you were the loudest of us all!”

“Was not,” he quips, annoyed.

“Was too! Wasn’t he, Eren?” Connie grins at him. “Other than you, of course.”

Armin lets out a quiet chuckle next to him, and Eren feels like he hasn’t heard it in so long that his mood lifts and he grins back at Connie. “Not as loud as you were when you attacked that tree.”

“Hey! It was dark and I was scared!”

“Or Sasha when she eats meat,” Mikasa points out.

That statement is so like her, that flash of sudden humour so irresistible that Eren feels a laugh bubbling up. Sasha doesn’t even look up from her food, but she flips them the finger, and Eren does laugh then, along with the others.

Jean stands, still grinning. “Well, I’m beat. Got an early day tomorrow.”

“Wait.” Mikasa stands up, too, holding her empty tray. “I’m coming, too.”

“Do you guys inhale your food or something?” Connie mutters, and Jean rolls his eyes. Eren misses his response when he sees Mikasa lean forward and place a roll of bread on Armin’s plate.

“Eat,” she says softly, and Armin nods, avoiding her gaze.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says, and Eren realises she’s talking to them both. “Good night.”

“Sweet dreams, Mikasa,” Eren murmurs automatically, something he used to say everyday when they were young and lived in Shiganshina.

She remembers, of course, and gives him a sad smile, a small nod. Then Eren sees Jean nudge her elbow. “Shall we?”

She nods again, her smile just a little bit brighter, and suddenly, Eren isn’t hungry anymore.

Captain Levi is heading the training today, and Eren wonders if Mikasa and Armin feel as nervous as he does. Eren sees the older man quite frequently -in meetings, in the corridors, sometimes watching him in the ocean or in his training from a distance. But Eren has barely spoken to him since their return, since his incarceration, since everyone died and everything changed.

“Right. We’re going to practice fighting with Eren’s Titan form today. For those of you who haven’t done this before,” the Captain eyes the few talented recruits who have been chosen out of the rest, “you’d better learn quick.”

He begins issuing orders, positioning them around and behind Eren, who finds all of this very familiar. He almost expects him to bark out a “Petra! Rear, left.” Almost hears Oluo’s harmless threats whispered into his ear as the recruits move past him. The painful twist in his chest is strong, even after all these months.

“… Sasha, right flank. Jean and Mikasa take point.”

Jean grins at Mikasa, and she actually smiles back, and something within Eren’s chest suddenly snaps.

“Why him?” He says loudly, and everybody freezes.

“What.” Captain Levi’s stare is all too familiar, but Eren has long since stopped being scared of it.

“Why Jean?” He repeats, the feeling in his chest expanding into a familiar burn.

“Because he’s the best, after her.” Captain Levi gestures at Mikasa, whose face is a frozen mask. “You got a problem with that?”

Jean had placed sixth in Training. After Eren.

“Connie and Sasha are just as good,” Eren argues.

The Captain gives him one cool, long stare. Then he turns to everyone else. “Training is cancelled. Report back to base and get new assignments.” Everyone hesitates a moment, but the Captain Levi is already sheathing his blades, and they begin to disperse.

“Eren, Jean. With me.”

Eren follows him immediately, ignoring the stares, ignoring stupid Jean’s stupid, angry, stomping footsteps. When they are almost at the castle, Captain Levi turns back to face them.

“I don’t know what the hell is going on between the two of you, even now, after everything.” The criticism cuts Eren like a knife. “Whatever it is, deal with it. I’m rescheduling the training to next week. I expect this to be resolved by then.”

Without waiting for a reply, Captain Levi stalks away.

There is a moment of silence. Then Jean takes a step towards Eren, his face twisted in anger, and-

“Jean.” It’s her. Mikasa is looking only at him, and suddenly Eren feels desperate for her gaze, some form of acknowledgement. But she doesn’t give it, simply looks at Jean. “We’re starting drills. Come on.” Her throat bobs as she swallows nervously, and it is then that Eren realises that she isn’t wearing her scarf.

Jean throws Eren one murderous look before letting her drag him away.

Eren spends the rest of the day in the library with Armin. They have found scant literature about the outside world in the Reiss’ secret collection. Still, whatever little was found had to be sifted through, matched and compared against whatever the Marleyan volunteers had given them.

He leaves when his eyes start to burn from the exertion, and forces Armin to go to bed. Then he makes his way to his own room, deciding that’s he’s not hungry after all.

He’s barely turned into the last corridor before someone grabs his arm and slams him against the wall. Eren is unsurprised to see Jean glaring down at him.

“What the fuck is your problem?” He snarls.

Eren feels the spike of anger again. “You, obviously.”

Jean looks like he wants to hit him, and Eren tenses up in anticipation. Come on, do it! Hit me. Make me hit you back, you-

To his shock, Jean lets go and takes a step back. “Why?”

Eren is practically reeling. “What?”

Jean lets out an annoyed snort. “Look, I don’t like you, okay. Never have, and I don’t see that changing soon. But I trust you enough to fight with you. Like Captain Levi said, after everything we’ve been through together-”

Jean stops talking abruptly, his jaw and fists clenched. Eren’s heart feels like it is clenching, too. He feels the truth of Jean’s words burning in his mind, his own shame burning in his veins. He doesn’t like Jean either, but that dislike is simply based on minor annoyances. When it came to it, he could trust Jean with his life.

Then… why-?

“So why are you sabotaging my success within the Corps?” Jean runs his hand through his hair, and Eren feels a jolt when he realises he does the same thing when he’s agitated. “Do you know what a big deal it is to be appointed by Captain Levi himself? Do you know what the recruits -my subordinates, will think of me now?”

Eren cannot look up from the floor. The shame within him rises.

“I mean, even Mikasa thinks you’re being unreasonable, and that’s something.”

It happens again. Rage sparks through Eren once more, replacing the shame. But before he can act on it, sudden understanding fills his mind, and he freezes, his mouth open, shock and dread pounding in his chest.

Mikasa.

Shit.

“Well?” Jean is frowning now, looking more and more annoyed by the minute.

Eren tries to speak and his voice comes out as a throaty rasp. “What-” he clears his throat, “what did Mikasa say?”

Jean’s eyes widen, and he knows he’s understood everything. The shame is back, burning harsher than before.

“Well.” Jean clears his throat, too, and Eren can’t decide if the gleam in his eyes is anger or glee. “About goddamn time you caught up with the rest of us.”

Eren blinks. “W-what?”

Jean snorts. “You’re the least observant idiot I’ve ever known.”

“Get to the point, Jean,” Eren grits out.

“It’s her. Mikasa. She’s always the point, always has been, and you’ve never seen it.” Jean looks pissed off again. “Everyone could see it, how special she is, how much she deserves, and-” His face is red now. “You never saw it. Never saw her, never cared enough, and now -now you think she’s still waiting? Like she has for years, and you kept pushing her away, and-”

Jean halts abruptly. Then he crosses his arms over his chest, not looking at him anymore. “It’s too late. Do you understand?” His glare settles on him again. “You’re too late now. So you’d best deal with it and let us all do our jobs. Okay?”

Eren can’t say a word, can’t do anything but stare back, his words pounding painfully in his head.

Jean gives him a stiff nod. “See you around, Jaeger,” he mutters and strides away, leaving Eren mute and frozen in the corridor, leaving him feeling terribly alone.

Eren can’t think straight, can’t settle down. He begins to pace his room as soon as he enters it and only stops when he feels the soreness of the soles of his feet. It’s like there’s a howling storm in his head, his moods shifting erratically with each metaphorical gust in his mind.

He still feels angry, feels a wave of fury wash over him every now and then when he remembers Jean’s almost smug face, but then the rage is whiffed away like a candle flame when he thinks of her. When he remembers how lovely her smile used to be, wider and freer when they were younger, how those smiles became more and more rare as the years passed. How much he had missed those smiles until they began to reappear in the last few days. How much he hates that she isn’t smiling at him anymore.

He changes into his nightclothes reluctantly, certain that sleep will not claim him tonight. He is about halfway up the buttons of his shirt when there is a low, discreet knock on his door. He recognises it, and chooses to ignore it. When the knock is repeated, he sighs. “What is it, Armin?”

“It’s me.”

He turns cold with shock. His legs move of their own volition, and he opens the door.

“Hi,” he breathes. “What’s wrong?”

Mikasa looks up at him as if searching for something on his face. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah, of course,” Eren steps aside and she walks in soundlessly. For a long moment they simply stare at each other. Eren doesn’t know what to say at all, because even looking at her face now hurts.

“I just wanted to talk to you about Jean.” Always to the point, always facing things head on. Eren wonders if she got that from him, or if she had always been that way.

“I -right.”

Mikasa is frowning at the floor. “He… he’s changed, you know.” She looks up at him. “Jean.”

“Or maybe you’re just more used to him now,” Eren says before he can stop himself. Mentally, he’s screaming at himself to calm the fuck down.

“Eren,” she sighs, in the same weary tone she has used with him for years. And it is that tone that does it, that makes Jean’s words come rushing back to his head: never cared enough.

“Yeah, I know,” he admits. “He’s more of a decent guy now.”

Mikasa snorts, but her expression remains unchanged. “I’m glad you’ve noticed. But then… today-”

“-won’t happen again,” Eren promises, ignoring the fact that she’s glad.

One of her eyebrows rise slightly. “You spoke to him?”

“More like he yelled at me,” Eren says, with a horrible attempt at a smile. “Anyway, we’re good now.”

“Are you?” Her stare, her beautiful grey stare, is making goosebumps rise on his skin. By the walls, how has he never seen how much she affects him?

“Yeah. I was… jealous.” He’s never one to lie about things (Armin was always better at that), and he’s not going to start now. As much as he feels like he’s swallowed a whole nest of bees, he can’t not tell her. “He’s spending so much time with you now, and you always… it was always me.”

Mikasa simply stares at him, and he wishes she wasn’t so good at hiding her emotions, because he is suddenly desperate to know what she is thinking. Do you hate me? He wants to ask her. Do you still think I’m tactless and immature? Do you think I never cared?

Do you still care? For me?

“He spoke to me,” she says. “Tried to tell me about… his feelings.” She is frowning slightly, looking at the floor again. “Not that they were much of a secret.”

Eren nods, but he doesn’t think she even sees it. She seems focused on a groove between two tiles, her toe nudging along it. He wants to chuck her chin up so she is meeting his gaze once more, but forces himself to stay still.

“I told him -that.” Her nostrils flare and her frown deepens as if the stone floor has mortally offended her. “I told him that he was too late. That there’s no time, there never will be enough time. In this life.” She abandons the crack in the floor and suddenly looks back up at him. Her eyes make Eren feel like he’s burning.

“In another life… things would be different,” she says softly, and there is a small tremble in her voice, enough to make him feel weak-kneed. “But now, with things as they are, things that are left to be done. I cannot -he cannot expect anything more.” Her hands grip her scarf tightly, and Eren feels his eyes burn with unshed tears -she is wearing it again.

“I cannot afford the distraction, and neither, I think, can you.” She blinks at him. “Right, Eren?”

His throat is too dry and he simply nods.

“But I would like to spend as much time as I can with him. As much as this life permits me.” The glance she throws him is like an arrow right in his chest.

“Of course.” He rasps, nodding.

She sighs, and lets go of her scarf. And then she takes two quick steps until she is suddenly right in front of him, and grabs his hand in a blink.

“You look tired. You need to rest.”

“I’ll try,” he mumbles.

She smiles a soft, sad, lovely smile. “Good night, Eren.”

“Sweet dreams, Mikasa.”

She gives his hand a soft squeeze, and then in a whisper of wind, she is gone.

Taking every last wink of his sleep with her.

#snk #jeankasa #mikasa ackerman #jean kirschtein #eren jaeger #snk spoilers #sorry if its too depressing #just taking a page from yams' policy of putting romance in the back burner #still i hope you liked it! :)#asks #delivras #snk fanfiction

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