#it's comforting to know that good people aren't just Effortlessly Good because they were Just Born That Way Naturally

[lord-squiggletits]

Y'know the thing about writing feral/unhinged versions of Orion/Optimus, is that you can't go too far into the feral/unhinged direction to a point where OP's core character traits are lost or become too diminished. After all, in a multiple-continuity franchise like TF, part of what makes the stories make sense is that even if details change (sometimes major details), the characters are still recognizably themselves to one degree or another. (Although this isn't always the case due to executive meddling or some characters being such blank slates from their initial G1 appearances that there's basically nothing to model them off of, but I digress.)

It's pretty much another reason why I love IDW1 Optimus, bc he literally is a canonical feral/unhinged Optimus who's unhinged as a direct consequence of who he is as a person and what he's been through. Like, he still has those fundamental character traits of trying his best to be moral and make good choices, trying to be a role model, etc, except after 4 million years of war and untreated depression he's basically holding onto his sense of self by his fingertips. So when he "goes feral" e.g. losing his temper and beating up/killing people or saying hurtful things, he's feral in a way that's directly tied to his normal personality and not just as a random quirk he has.

IDW OP's feral moments arise from the gaps between "Optimus' attempts to be who he thinks he needs to be" and "the reality of the world that he can't fix/seems to only make worse" that cause him to lose hope, or become cynical, or lose his temper. But in this case, the unhinged-ness makes perfect sense because it arises out of Optimus trying and failing to be the best person or to make the most morally good choices he's trying to make. Basically, the "feral/unhinged" label is just another way of me trying to say that he's not just unhinged because he's weird or because he's a bad person, but because it's an emotional reaction (more like an emotional explosion due to pent-up emotions) to the context he exists in.

I'd also say that IDW OP's personality being generally reserved/stoic and (trying to be) noble works in tandem with those moments he has of going feral because it makes him more realistic. His psyche is treated in a way where the writers are like, "Hey what if the pressure of having to be everyone's idol and be the best person in the galaxy at all times actually broke Optimus down mentally and emotionally?" It makes IDW OP far more relatable. Instead of naturally being a perfect Christ-like figure who never wavers in his morals or convictions and is just naturally a nice person who always has the wisest and best answer, being a good person is something that IDW OP has to consciously strive to be. Even when he feels like it's useless, or the cycle of violence will never stop, or any attempts he makes to help only ends up with things becoming worse.

And I feel like this does a service not only to IDW Optimus as a character, but also as a sort of moral/philosophical perspective for the reader to ponder upon? I feel like culture at large (or at least my experience of it) tends to believe that "goodness" in a person is simply an innate feature that people are born/not born with, and that being "good" means that you must be good at all times, both in your actions as well as the way you feel emotionally about yourself and the world. Like, there's a tendency for our vision of "a good person" to be good in every aspect at all times without having to try to be a good person. So I think IDW Optimus' character stands as a good example of how someone can be good at heart but still struggle to maintain those feelings of optimism and hope and justice. It's a good idea to have such a paragon of a character (in-universe and out-of-universe) be so conflicted and to even be mistaken, misguided, or make things worse because it shows that goodness is as much about "trying to behave/act in a way that is good" and not just "existing as an innately good person."

It's way more realistic for a person to want to be good, try to be good, and sometimes/often fail than it is for them to just be a good person. I enjoy the fact that IDW Optimus is both a good person at heart, but also has to strive to be a good person and live up to other people's expectations of what they see in him. I like how he wants to be a good person and change society for the better, but he also spends a good amount of time either feeling hopeless and alone or being angry at/detached from other people because of how frustrated they make him. He's realistically portrayed as someone who wants to be good and hopeful and change things for the better, but is also mentally and emotionally broken by that burden because of how impossible it is for him to Fix Everything and be the Perfect Prime/Leader/Autobot that people see him as. It's this fascinating mixture of "yes, this is who he is as a person" but also "there are things he desires to be that he could never possibly become or live up to."

This got really far off based from feral/unhinged Optimus sdklfjaslkdlfkas. The TLDR is that if people want unhinged OP, I feel like they should give IDW OP a chance because he IS unhinged but he's unhinged in a way that's a realistic/thematic representation of how being an Absolute Good is impossible. And how being a good person isn't just about Existing And You Are A Good Person, but rather goodness is a constant state of flux in which you adjust, you make mistakes, you lose your temper and feel hopeless, but then you pick yourself up and try again.

Also IDW OP really likes climbing in dangerous wilderness and jumping out of flying vehicles which I think is very feral and sexy of him to do.

#squiggposting #idw op love #idk if i adequately explained it in the body of the post. but i really do feel some kind of way about the idea of like #being a good person isn't about just being static. always being the same person. just naturally being good and nice all teh time #but rather being a good person will cause you to be CHALLENGED and being a good person calls you to ACT #and you WILL make mistakes. there's never a situation in which you're all wise and always have the right solution or are infinitely patient #but goodness is something you can CHOOSE something you can BECOME and you can still have negative emotions and CHOOSE to be good #like being a good person is a continuous process of self improvement. you aren't just born a good person #and i'm not trying to tear down the notion of 'goodness' or say it doesn't exist #rather i'm trying to say that it's far more comforting to hear that you don't have to be The Best Person at all times #it's comforting to know that good people aren't just Effortlessly Good because they were Just Born That Way Naturally #there certainly are some people like that but most of us aren't like that. and i just like idw op for that reason #he shows that like. you can be a fucked up mentally ill guy who despairs and loses his temper and is basically suicidal #but you also still genuinely try to be hopeful and try to help others. like you are good because you Try To Be Good #and you Try To Hold Onto Your Principles bc giving up or becoming evil isn't an option for you #but also trying to be A Good Person drives you fucking crazy bc we live in a universe where that perfect good simply isn't possible #so the result is an optimus who's at once Noble Paragon and Unhinged bc he's unhinged as a result of trying to be a paragon

[joonsmagicshop]

Wait, You're a Virgin?

Summary: Jungkook gets teased at a college party for being a virgin and asks you to help him out

Paring: Virgin Jungkook/Reader (Jimin and Tae for the plot)

Word Count: 8.8k

Rating: M/18+ because smut

Tags: porn with plot, virgin Jungkook, first time, fluff, smut, handjobs, blow jobs, eating pussy, fingering, fucking, college drinking, College AU

Authors Note: This all started because of the duality of Jeon Jungkook because how can one man be so small and cute but sexy at the same time????? Also please know if you are a virgin in college there is nothing wrong with you and it is totally A-ok. Everyone is on a different timeline when it's meant to happen it will happen

The library was your sanctuary and safe space.

A place where you could listen to the quiet hum of the heater and hear the soft sounds of pencils scratching against paper while you focused on the mountain of homework you had to complete.

You would not be hearing the sounds of rough sex in the library

Which was exactly what brought you here tonight.

Your roommate and her boyfriend had decided to have sex…again…for the third time today and this time, they were not being quiet about it.

You felt gross listening in, but even your headphones couldn't block out the noise of his grunts and moans so you hastily grabbed your stuff and threw it into a tote bag before getting out of there as quickly as possible and making your way to the library.

It was a Friday night and the library was busier than usual. You knew most college students were in the same boat as you. November was fast approaching and assignments and final exams loomed over most of the students as they all crammed to remember what they had learned.

You were planning on studying tonight anyway so you took your usual spot at the small wooden desk by the window and got settled in.

Textbooks were spread out everywhere and you started up your laptop as you pulled your hair back into a ponytail. You hummed quietly to yourself as you pulled your sweater off your body.

Right as you were about to start studying your phone vibrated loudly against the desk. Multiple people glared at you as you ducked your head and apologized, quickly turning your phone to silent and checking to see who was texting you.

You tried to stifle your giggles as you pictured Taehyung's horrified face as he stood by the door hearing your roommate going at it.

You grinned as you could imagine the blush that was covering Taehyung's cheeks. He had been harboring a massive, mega crush on Park Jimin since the start of the year. He had accidentally turned a corner too quickly on campus and bumped right into him. Jimin was polite and kept apologizing over Taehyung's apologizes and they both had a good laugh out of it

A week later he was claiming it was fate and Jimin and him were meant to be.

Tae had started to drag you to parties he knew Jimin would be attending. Most of the time choosing to stare at him from across the room before actually going over to talk to him. As the weeks dragged on Tae had become a lot more comfortable and got to know Jimin and his friends, easing himself into their group effortlessly.

You slipped your phone into your jacket pocket and smiled.

You slipped your headphones on and turned on some random background music track as you got to work. Every once in a while taking breaks to stretch or drink water, sometimes just staring out the window at the cars that would drive by. The sun had set hours ago and you checked your phone to see you had already been working for almost two hours.

Just as you were about to pack up, your phone screen flashed, signaling someone was calling you.

“Hello?” You said quietly packing up your stuff and trying to keep your voice low.

“Y/N. Need you to come to this party. Now.” Tae demanded with an air of urgency.

“Tae I said I wanted to get some work done…remember? Besides aren't you with your man?” You teased as you slung your backpack over your shoulder and exited the library, opting to sit on one of the comfy couches that were just outside the library.

“I'm trying to be with my man but I need you here. Right now. He's been man-napped and I need your help.” Tae said, clearly upset.

“Man-napped? What does that even mean?” You ask trying to hold back your snickers.

“It means someone has been all over him all night and I can't get him alone. I need you here as a distraction. Now.” Taehyung explained. You shook your head. Taehyung was always known for being slightly dramatic.

“Who's all over him anyway?” You respond as you lean back against the couch and close your eyes.

“Jeon Jungkook.” Tae grits out and you want to laugh

You really do

“Jeon Jungkook? Seriously?” You deadpan

Jeon Jungkook was very shy and quiet. He had been to multiple parties but you had hardly said two words to him. He had dark hair and big doe eyes that made him seem a lot younger. He mostly hung out with Kim Namjoon who could make friends with almost anybody.

“Yes. Jungkook. But he's…different.” Tae explained as you let out an exasperated sigh.

“Tae. Please. I need more information before I drop everything and show up to Jimin's” You explain to him rubbing a hand down your face.

“Oh. We're not at Jimin's were at Liza's, her parents….it doesn't matter. What matters is Jungkook is stealing my man Y/N.” Taehyung all but whines.

“Jungkook? Like the Jungkook that doesn't leave Namjoon's side?” You prod for more information failing to hide the disbelief in your voice.

“He's… okay well did you know he has a full sleeve of tattoos? Did you know that under all those baggy clothes he's fit as fuck? He's man-napping Jimin. I need you to come and distract him.” Taehyung finally explains as you sit up a little straighter.

Because no.

You didn't know any of that about Jungkook.

It seemed hard to picture him like that but you combed through your memory trying to figure out if you ever saw him in a short-sleeved shirt.

“1950 Maple Road. Text me when you're here.” Taehyung said before the phone line went dead.

You stared at your phone in disbelief as you called a taxi to take you there

“This is ridiculous,” You told yourself as you got in the taxi

“Jungkook is nothing to worry about.” You reminded yourself as you paid the driver and set off towards the house, texting Taehyung on the way.

“Tae is being dramatic.” You muttered under your breath as he met you at the front door.

You quickly dropped your bag and took off your shoes as you looked around.

The music was loud, but not loud enough to drown out conversation as Taehyung dragged you around the house. You saw some people you recognized from class and sent them small waves as you were brought from room to room before you settled in the kitchen.

“See!” Tae exclaimed as he not so subtly pointed towards the massive living room where Jimin and Jungkook were sitting on a couch together, Namjoon sitting on the floor, his long legs sprawled out.

Your jaw dropped.

It was Jungkook but not how you remembered him.

He was wearing a white short-sleeved shirt and his tattoos were on full display. His legs were spread wide and his knee was bumping into Jimin's. His hands were around a red solo cup and he took a sip and scanned the crowd.

“Told you.” Taehyung hissed in your ear as he pulled you towards the couch before you could even process what you were seeing.

“Hey Y/N made it!” Tae announced as Jimin and Namjoon smiled and greeted you. Jungkook gave you a quick glance then turned to look around at the party. Clearly, he was still shy under this tough guy persona.

Taehyung chose to sit on the armrest of the couch next to Jimin so you had no choice but to sit on the armrest on the other side of the couch, next to Jungkook.

You weren't really paying attention to the conversation around you, it was about a video game you knew nothing about. Instead you tried to formulate a plan to get Jungkook alone. As his knee kept bumping Jimin's and Tae kept shooting you worried looks.

“I didn't know you had tattoos Jungkook?” You said nudging him to get his attention.

He looked up at you, his big dark eyes widening. You pointed towards his tattoos and he blushed.

“Yeah, I'm an art student so it…kind of fits the vibe you know…Namjoon said-” He was cut off when Namjoon swatted his knee and gave him a pointed look.

“I just wanted to wear short sleeves tonight.” He finished lamely and you giggled wondering what Namjoon had said to the boy.

Before you could continue Seokjin came by to talk to Namjoon about class and Namjoon got up from the floor and promised he would be back soon, as he followed Seokjin in the crowd.

Now it was just Tae, Jimin, Jungkook, and yourself.

Now was the time to make a move.

Before you could even open your mouth to say something a girl came up to the couch eyeing Jungkook.

“Hey, we are going to start a game of Never Have I Ever in the dining room. You should join us.” She said with a smile of her over-glossed lips, staring at Jungkook and Jungkook only.

“Yeah, Jungkook let's go!” You said excitedly hopping off the armrest and looking at him.

This was the perfect opening to get Tae and Jimin alone.

God, you were a good friend.

Jungkook looked unsure but the girl didn't give him time to say no. Instead, she wrapped a well-manicured hand around his arm and pulled him from the couch dragging him through the crowd.

Taehyung snickered as you shook your head.

“Well, I should go keep an eye on him.” You say excusing yourself and grinning as you make your way through the house, taking the long way to the kitchen, which was right next to the dining room.

You found a red solo cup and filled it with pop as you kept an eye on the party. Tucked back against the kitchen wall you had a great view of the dining room, where Jungkook was dragged into a chair by the girl and looking super nervous.

You also had a great view of the living room where Taehyung took Jungkook's place on the couch looking like he had just won the lottery.

You smiled to yourself as you sipped your drink and watched the party unfold. You were more than happy to be a wallflower, just taking it all in.

Your thoughts were interrupted when someone squeezed your arm and you looked to see Namjoon standing there with a dimpled grin.

“About time they got together.” He said nodding in the direction of Tae and Jimin whose heads were bent low, talking together.

“That's what I've been saying! The fact Tae dragged me here as a babysitter is ridiculous. He had nothing to worry about.” You admitted.

“Babysitter?” Namjoon asked as you flushed realizing what you just admitted.

“Uh. Shit. I shouldn't have said anything.” You said, embarrassed as Namjoon let out a soft laugh and adjusted his black beanie.

“Tae called me in a panic because he was worried about Jungkook. I'm supposed to be distracting him so Tae can have Jimin to himself. But I guess it all worked out.” You admitted with a shy smile.

“Ah. Yeah, Tae had nothing to worry about. Jimin has been telling me for months he thought Tae was hot. Plus Jungkook isn't like that. He thinks Jimin is cool. That's all.” Namjoon admits, sipping his drink again

“What did you tell him about his tattoos?” You suddenly asked as Namjoon let out a laugh and nearly spilled his drink in the process.

“He wasn't supposed to say anything! I told him, well I told him if he displays them instead of hiding under all these baggy clothes maybe he could get laid. I didn't think it would actually work.” He said surprised as you both looked over to the dining room where the girl was practically on his lap.

“Good for him.” You said with a small smile.

“Yeah. Listen, if Tae is having you play babysitter I'm gonna go talk to some people. Keep an eye on Jungkook. See you” Namjoon said squeezing your arm again and disappearing into the mix of people.

About five minutes after Namjoon left you alone in the kitchen the sounds from the dining room caught your attention.

You walked over, staying against the wall as you would much rather watch than play.

“Never have I ever gone skinny dipping!” A redheaded girl said completely slurring her words and thrusting her cup in the air, spilling half the drink on the table.

“Boring!” Someone called out and you watched as Jungkook seemed to flinch. You weren't sure if it was because of the question or because the girl was dragging her fingernails up and down his arm teasingly and shooting him what could only be described as bedroom eyes.

He was looking uncomfortable again, like he didn't know what to do with her and would rather be anywhere else.

“Let's get spicy shall we?” One of the guys said with a smirk that had your stomach twisting even though you were still against the wall not playing the game.

“Never have I ever had sex in public.” He called out.

Most people let out laughs and almost all of the table took a drink.

Except Jungkook.

Which got the attention of the girl who was currently tangling her fingers in the soft hairs at the nape of Jungkook's neck.

“What? You haven't?” She exclaimed loudly, which had most of the table looking over.

Jungkook looked like a deer in the headlights. You could see a rosy blush covering his cheeks and his eyes were wide and panicked.

Before he could answer someone else chimed in.

“Okay, never have I ever had sex!”

This time everyone at the table drank.

Except Jungkook.

The girl who was almost in his lap wasn't having that and stared him down.

“Wait you're a virgin? You are in college and a virgin?!” She asked obnoxiously loud as people around the table began to laugh.

“How old are you anyways?” a guy teased which got the attention of the whole table.

The girl took it a step further and grabbed her chair and made a big show of moving it as far away from his as possible.

The table erupted in loud laughter and Jungkook remained seated, a red blush covering his face and hanging his head in embarrassment.

“No seriously? How have you not fucked anyone before?” Another girl halfway down the table asked as the girl who was all over him a moment ago was rolling her eyes as if he wasn't worth her time.

Jungkook didn't lift his head. You could feel his embarrassment from across the room as the table kept laughing and teasing him with snide remarks.

You saw the same girl that was all over him about to open her mouth again and without thinking you stepped in.

You marched up to the table and raised your voice.

“Never have I ever been an asshole about something that is not my business and not a big deal anyway?” You said staring them all down with a cold look in your eye.

People stared up at you in shock and the crowd at the table completely went silent. Before anyone could form a sentence you continued.

“You better drink.” You said snarling at them as you nodded to Jungkook and he quickly raised himself from the chair.

Before you could move one of the guys spoke up.

“Why so offended? Are you a sad virgin too?” He teased as the table roared with laughter.

You didn't bother to respond, instead, you grabbed Jungkook's hand and stormed out of the dining room and to the front entrance, you grabbed your coat and bag and went right out the front door. Their laughter ringing loud in your ears.

Jungkook stared you down in awe and you finally turned to look at him after you calmed down a bit.

“I-You didn't have to do that. I mean thank you. But you didn't have to.” He said looking at you with a small smile.

Even though he said you didn't have to you could tell he was pleased that you got him out of that terrible game.

“Yeah, I did. They shouldn't have shamed you for that! It's stupid. Who cares if you have fucked a bunch of people or no one at all. It's not their business.” You replied firmly still feeling heated.

“Hey. It's okay.” Jungkook replied pulling you from your thoughts.

“I know I just. I hate when people shame people like that. It's wrong.” You admit finally feeling calm as you sighed and sat on the step.

Jungkook sat down next to you and rubbed his hands together trying to warm himself up.

You both stayed out there for a while. Not talking but sitting close enough that your legs were touching. You stared up at the stars and took in the silence.

“Listen you don't have to stay out here with me. I think I'm just gonna go home anyway.” You admit pulling out your phone to get a ride.

“I'll drive you home.” He said with a small smile as he grabbed your hand and helped you up.

“Jungkook you don't have to. It's fine.” You said.

“Think of it as a thank you for standing up for me. Come on it will save you money. I promise I'm completely sober. Couldn't drink during that game anyway.” He said with a big grin as he led you down the street to his car.

Once you both got inside he cranked the heat to take away the chill and kept the music low in case you wanted to talk.

Eventually, he pulled in front of your dorm and shut off the car you were feeling a lot more relaxed the further you got from the party.

“Thanks again for standing up for me.” He said. His voice small as he smiled at you softly.

You smiled back at him as you grabbed your bag from the floor and held it on your lap.

“Can I ask you? Are you…I mean have you….had…sex?” Jungkook asked as he stared you down with a confused look on his face.

You nodded.

“It happened with a guy I met in my first year. We saw each other for about three months and then had sex. It wasn't that great.” You muttered with a laugh. “Then he blocked and deleted my number and never spoke to me again. I tried to confront him in person but he acted like he didn't know me. It was super embarrassing.”

“That should not have happened to you. I'm sorry Y/N.” He said softly as he put his hands on the steering wheel and stared out the windshield. His side profile is illuminated by the streetlights.

“Yeah well. You live and learn, right? You haven't had sex and I got ghosted after sex. We're a great combo.” You said with a humorless laugh, fiddling with the straps on your backpack not sure what to say.

“Can I…ask you another question?” He says sounding nervous as he won't look at you, instead still staring out the windshield into the dark night.

“Of course.” You say softly.

“Would you? Want to have sex….with me?” He says slowly, as if he was testing the waters.

Your eyes widened and you felt your stomach swoop as you stared him down.

“I mean I'm a virgin and you didn't have the best experience and I just thought- forget it it's… God, I can't believe I said that out loud.” He rambled.

You put a hand on his arm to stop him as he finally looked at you. Eyes wide, lips parted.

“Jungkook where is this coming from? Talking about sex and having sex are two different things and before tonight. I mean, we hardly said two words to each other.” You replied feeling your heart hammer in your chest.

“I just- I don't know I want my first time to be with someone I can trust. Someone I know. And after tonight… I mean you stood up for me in front of an entire crowd. You could see I was uncomfortable and stepped in. You didn't shame me for being a virgin and I just, god I don't know, I want it to be with someone I like. And trust. And that's you.” He says lacing his fingers through yours as you're taken aback

He trusts you?

He likes you?

“You….like me?” You ask feeling yourself grin.

Jungkook stares you down and smiles.

“Out of all that you only took away that I like you?” He teased as you let out a breathy laugh and the tension dispels a little bit.

“Namjoon said if I dressed more confident, became more confident, maybe you would notice me. It worked tonight huh?” He said with a smirk as your jaw dropped

“And here Namjoon told me you were doing it so you could get laid! That liar!” You said, body shaking with laughter.

“Well I mean, I did ask for that too didn't I?” He said back as you stopped laughing and stared him down.

The car suddenly feels hotter

and way smaller

You felt your face heat up and realized he was serious. So serious about the whole thing.

“Namjoon has known I've liked you for… a while now. He told me that being shy won't get your attention so he helped me tonight by making me dress like this. I'm not just using you to get laid Y/N I do really like you. I think you're smart and pretty and I trust you with this.”

You swallowed hard.

“But also I want to get to know you. If you'll let me.”

Before you could form an answer Jungkook took your phone and you watched as he put his number into your contacts.

Your thoughts were going a mile a minute as he handed you back your phone. You stared down at it in disbelief as he grinned at you.

“Anyway, I should get back to the party. I'm Namjoon's ride home.” He says as you grab your bag and exit the car. Still trying to process what he just said.

“Text me yeah?” He said as you closed the door and he shot you a smile before peeling away, back to the party.

------------

You texted Jungkook to make sure he had made it home safe

He had responded within minutes.

He also sent you a funny meme

You sent one back

Which had you both staying up well past midnight talking and sending funny pictures and videos back and forth

He told you about his tattoos

He told you about his childhood

His parents

You shared your life with him as he shared his with you.

It was turning into a beautiful friendship and after almost a month you were as close to Jungkook as you were with Taehyung.

November was a busy month full of studying and homework. You spent most of your days in the library now anyway as your roommate and her boyfriend's idea of a break from studying was to fuck wildly in the dorm.

You knew it was part of the college experience but you wondered if at this point you should just move into the library with how much time you were starting to spend there.

It also made you think of Jungkook's

and what he asked for that night.

That specific topic has not been brought up since. However, you couldn't stop thinking about it.

About him.

He was so funny, and sweet, and kind. Even though he had this shy exterior once you got to know him he was pretty impressive and there were a couple of pictures he had sent you that you saved in your phone just in case.

Like the one of him coming out of the shower showing you his tattoo sleeve with a grin on his face.

Like he knew what he was doing to you.

But all that would have to be put on hold because exam season was fast approaching and even Tae was starting to head to the library to study more.

The weather got colder and you spent most of your days either studying, grabbing a warm drink with Tae, or when your roommate was out you would curl up on the very small dorm room couch and watch a movie, snuggled in your comfiest clothes.

Sometimes Taehyung would join you for a movie. Eating most of the snacks and talking over the whole thing, usually about how cute Jimin was.

Sometimes Jungkook would join you. He would attempt to fold himself up as small as possible to fit on the couch trying to give you space, eventually, you would cave and lay in his lap so he had room to spread his legs.

Sometimes you would go to Jimin's house. Where the group would have a movie night or game night and somehow you would always gravitate towards Jungkook. Either being on his team for a video game or sitting on the same couch as him during a movie.

Tae begged you to just ask him out at this point

Oh, how the tables have turned.

By the time December came around these hangouts were non-existent. Everyone was in study mode and you hardly had time to schedule a meet-up as your books were piled high and you were cramming as much as you could just to pass your classes before winter break.

On your last exam day, you got an early gift from your roommate. You knew she always went home for the holidays and usually left the same day as you. However this year she and her boyfriend wanted to do a mini road trip before they went home so they were leaving a couple of days earlier than usual.

You immediately texted Taehyung and voted for a movie night. One last hangout before you all go home for the holidays.

He agreed as long as he could bring Jimin

You agreed as long as you could invite Jungkook.

Jimin showed up wearing a bright red Christmas sweater and he brought loads of snacks.

Tae showed up in a green Christmas sweater giving you a kiss on the cheek and bringing some drinks

Jungkook showed up in a red short-sleeved shirt and jeans, apologizing because this was the most festive thing he owned

You didn't really care because he looked good in red.

Very good in red.

Taehyung and Jimin grabbed pillows and settled in on the floor as they got the movie set up. Jungkook got in his usual position on the couch and you followed suit, snuggling into his arms and pulling a blanket over both of you as Tae and Jimin were getting comfortable on the floor.

Halfway through the movie you shifted in your seat to get more comfortable as your right leg was starting to go numb. As you shifted Jungkook wrapped his hands around you tighter and you moved backward pushing yourself further into his lap when you felt something.

A hardness

Poking into your back.

You froze as his grip tightened around you.

“Y/N.” He whispered in your ear which caused goosebumps to break out on your arms.

You pushed back against it again and he let out a breathy grunt in your ear.

He was hard.

Very hard.

Oh.

“Y/N stop moving… please.” He whined lowly in your ear.

The movie was long forgotten as you sat there, his arms still wrapped around you, hardness still poking you as you fought the urge to shift around some more.

Finally, the movie ended and you untangled yourself from him. His boner was long gone by now but you could feel your skin flushed at the very thought of him being hard.

You jumped from the couch helping Tae clean as Jimin and Jungkook chatted.

“When are you and Jimin heading out?” You asked Tae in the kitchen as he helped you pack everything up and clean the multiple snack bowls.

“Tomorrow afternoon. I'm driving him to his house then we're celebrating apart. The relationship is too new for the whole meet the entire family thing.” Taehyung explains with a cute boxy grin.

You could tell he was over the moon to be with Park Jimin and you were happy for him.

“What about you? When are you and Jungkook making it official?” He teases back and you shush him and shoot a glance at the living room.

Before you can answer Jimin comes into the small kitchen and wraps his arms around Tae saying that he was sleepy and was ready to go home.

Jungkook offers to help you clean the rest as they both put on their coats and say their goodbyes. Giving you hugs and wishing you Happy Holidays as they leave.

Suddenly it's just you and Jungkook

and you feel nervous.

He begins busying himself with cleaning the living room as you assist him. Neither of you spoke as you cleaned up blankets and pillows and the leftover chips Taehyung spilled when he was leaning in to kiss Jimin.

You could feel this invisible tension in the room as you both worked in silence. The dorms were pretty quiet because most people had gone home for the holidays and you almost wished there was some kind of noise.

“Listen I want to say I'm sorry,” Jungkook said breaking the silence as you put a pillow back on the couch and stared at him

“I just. I didn't mean to freak you out. It's just… you were in my lap… and moving around and it just kind of happened. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable” He admitted shyly looking at the floor.

You stared at him in disbelief.

You weren't uncomfortable at all

You were horny

For him.

“Jungkook.” You breathed as you stepped towards him.

“I'm not uncomfortable at all. Random hard ons are natural you know.” You all but whisper feeling your heart rate start to pick up.

“Well, I wouldn't say it was random Y/N. You in those tight leggings and that sweater, fuck. You look so hot… and then you were squirming in my lap… I mean… God.” He says running a hand through his dark hair.

You looked down at your outfit and almost laughed.

You were just wearing a plain forest green sweater and black leggings.

“You have no idea what you do to me.” He admits with a shy smile which has you leaning in closer, breath fanning over your face.

“Have you kissed anyone before?” You ask voice low as he wraps his hands around your upper arms bringing you closer.

“Yeah.”

“Kiss me.” You all but sigh as he pulls you in and his lips connect with yours.

His kisses are soft and gentle. He takes his time pressing his lips into yours and his fingertips massage your upper arms.

You step closer so you are pushed right up against his body as he leans down and deepens the kiss. Tongue darting out to lick at the seam of your lips.

You open your mouth and let him take his time exploring you. His hands now rubbing up and down your arms.

All the days and weeks of talking, flirting, and getting to know each other poured out into this kiss.

You reach up and tangle your hands through his hair as he lets out a content sigh in your mouth. He walks you backwards so you are now pressed up against the wall next to the door, his body towering over you and caging you in as the kisses become more needy, and frantic.

You want to rip off his clothes and devour him whole. But you also know he is new to this whole thing and you want to take it slow. Make it good for him. Make it good for both of you.

You can once again feel his hardness poke against your hip and you grind down into it which has sweet moans falling from his lips.

You push your body into him harder as the kiss gets more aggressive. He is biting at your lips and pushing into you, his body covering yours as you can feel your stomach swoop and wetness coat your underwear.

You slowed down the kisses and Jungkook followed suit as you slowly pulled away and couldn't hide the grin that spread over your face.

He looked absolutely fucked out

Just from a kiss

His lips were red and slightly bruised, his eyes were wide, his hair was a mess and he was hard, so obviously achingly hard in his jeans.

You were sure you didn't look much better.

“Do you want to…?” You asked staring at him.

He nodded pulling up his shirt in haste and nearly getting it stuck over his head.

You smiled and shook your head as you helped him out of his sweater.

Sure you had seen him shirtless before, mostly in pictures but seeing it in real life was totally different. He was so toned and beautiful and you wanted to stand here for a lifetime taking him in.

“My eyes are up here.” He teased you as you finally broke your gaze from his chest and felt a blush creep up your neck.

“Jungkook are you sure you want to?” You ask softly taking his hands in yours and looking him in the eye.

“I've wanted to since that night at the party Y/N. God, I want to so bad. Please let me fuck you.” He replies which has your pussy aching.

“There are things we should do first before we dive right in.” You explain to him as he nods, teeth biting into his lower lip in anticipation.

“Please. Show me. Teach me.” He says, voice tinged with desperation as you bring a hand up to his arm and spin him around so he is now the one pressed up against the wall.

Jungkook lets out a shaky breath as you trail your hand down his chest. Down, down, down you go as his eyes follow your every move.

You give him some more pressure and his hips buck up into your hand.

His skin is soft but taut under your warm palm as you slowly bring your hand to rest on his waistline.

His breath hitches when you go lower, pressing your palm into his erection which has him twitching against you. Head thrown back against the wall and a pretty whine slipped from his lips.

“God you're so big.” You whisper which has his eyes closing and his head thrown back.

“You can't say stuff like that Y/N…god.” He admits as you bring your hand up to unbutton his jeans.

“And why not?” You tease as you shimmy his jeans down and he helps you. Kicking them off and flinging them somewhere in the room.

“Because it's so hot to hear you say that and I'm scared I'm gonna cum in my pants.” He says with a hint of shyness as you stare at him.

“I'm sorry I know you expect me to last long but when you say shit like that and do shit like that. Fuck. I don't think I will be able to.”

You smile as you palm him through the thin material of his boxers. Watching as his cock jumps into your hand.

“Jungkook I have no expectations. This is your first time and our first time together. Believe me. I'm gonna make you cum more than once. Don't worry about having to last.” You say as his eyes widen and you stare up at him.

“Fuck your perfect. Do you know how perfect you are?” He says pulling you in for a kiss. Pushing his erection into you to get some relief as you swallow down his moans.

“You have to tell me if you want me to stop or if there is anything you don't like.” You say firmly, teasing the hem of his boxers.

He nods as you finally pull them down and his erection springs free.

His cock is thick and red as you take it in. It slaps up against his stomach and you watch as pre-cum oozes out the tip and down his shaft.

You feel your body ache for him and try to push the feeling aside.

This is about him right now.

You slowly bring your hand up to your mouth as you lick your palm, getting it wet before wrapping your fingers around the base of his cock and he lets out a shaky moan as you begin to stroke him slowly. His eyes are blown wide and glued to your hand and how it is moving smoothly across his velvety cock.

“Good?” You ask as you twist your hand at the top which has him twitching in your grasp.

“So good.” He confirms.

You keep him pinned against the wall as you continue to stroke him. Watching as his breath gets heavier and his teeth gnaw at his lower lip. You want to suck him off. You really do. So you pull away and grab his hand. Bringing him towards the couch and having him sit down.

You grab a pillow for under your knees and when Jungkook realizes what you are about to do he lets out a shaky breath and runs a hand through his hair, messing up his now sweaty locks.

“Wanna suck you off.” You mutter as Jungkook groans above you.

“Is that okay?” You ask and he lets out a little laugh

“Y/N at this point yes to everything. Absolutely anything.” He replies as you stare at him.

“Jungkook this is your first time. I need to know you want this. Consent is important.” You say firmly sitting back on your heels and staring up at him.

“I- shit sorry I just. Your right. Yes, you can suck me off.” He stammers as you smile up at him.

“Good boy.” You say as you watch his cock twitch against your cheek.

You stop your movements

and make eye contact with him

He is a blushing mess

and his cock is absolutely oozing pre-cum

“You like being called a good boy?” You ask with a knowing smirk.

“I…shit. Yes? Maybe? I don't know I can't think straight with you that close to my cock.” He utters as you finally slip him in your mouth.

You wish you could have recorded the moan that fell from his lips when you finally swallowed him down.

It was the sweetest thing you had ever heard.

Your hand came up to accompany your mouth as you jerked him off and sucked him down.

Jungkook was a mess above you.

His thighs were shaking and he was whining and moaning. His hands tangled in your hair to keep it pulled back and when he pulled a little bit too hard, you moaned around his length.

Your hand sped up along his shaft as you worked him toward orgasm. His body shook above you as you sucked and slobbered all over his cock.

“Gonna. Fuck. Please. Keep going.” He whined out as you work harder and stroked him faster, feeling his cock throb against your tongue knowing he was close and wanting to be the one to push him over the edge.

Y/N.” He warns, as you as you keep going.

“Y/N I'm gonna cum.” He warns you again as you pull your lips off him and stare up into his beautifully fucked out face.

“Wanna cum in my mouth?” You ask as he grips your hair tighter and you don't give him time to respond as you wrap your lips around his cock once more and suck him off as he groans and cums down your throat.

He must have been very pent up because the cum absolutely coated your tongue and you took your time slowing down your movements and breathing through your nose as you worked him through his orgasm.

He was breathing heavily above you and let out a soft wine as you pulled off his cock and swallowed his load.

You opened your mouth to show him and he raked a shaky hand down his sweaty face.

“You're going to be the death me of Y/N, I swear.” He mutters.

You moved the pillows from your knees and sat on the couch next to him. Cuddling him softly and letting him catch his breath.

He kept his head thrown back and eyes shut which gave you great access to his neck, where you were placing soft kisses against the skin.

“Y/N fuck.” He finally breathed out as he opened his eyes to look at you.

You smiled at him

You switched positions so you were now straddling his thighs as you started to kiss him. Your body is thrumming with need as his hands are playing with the hem of your shirt.

You nod against him, answering an unspoken question as he slowly lifts the material up and over your head.

You feel shy as he takes in your almost naked upper body.

You were glad you opted for a sleek black bra today.

His hands come around your body to unclasp the bra and once he gets it off he takes you in.

You sigh happily as you feel his lips explore your body.

His hands are wrapped around your waist holding you in place as he takes his time with you.

He slowly flicks your right nipple and you let out a high-pitched whine as you can feel him grin against your skin.

You start to grind against him as he licks and sucks your nipples. Wetness pools against your underwear as you grind harder against his thigh, desperate to relieve some of the throbbing.

“Can I take these off?” He asks as he motions to your leggings.

You stand up on shaky legs and nod as he peels them down your thighs.

He sucks in a breath as he takes you in.

“Should we go to your room?” He asks cocking an eyebrow as you nod and he lifts himself from the couch. His cock already starting to harden again as you make your way to your room and shut the door.

You turn on your bedside lamp and flop on the bed as Jungkook settles between your open thighs.

He can see the wetness that has stained your underwear and groans under his breath.

You waste no time in taking them off and throwing them in the room. Jungkook's eyes widen as he takes in your soaked core.

“Jungkook. Please.” You whine out desperate for him to do something.

Jungkook takes his time running his hands up and down your thighs as you spread yourself wider for him.

He moves his hands to rub along your lower stomach and you whine and buck your hips up, your core throbbing almost uncomfortably at this point.

“What do you want baby?” He asks.

“You. Please. Touch me.” You whine out as his fingers finally dip down into your folds and a broken moan escapes your lips as he brings your wetness up to your clit.

“Here?” He asks and you nod desperately as he begins to slowly circle your clit.

His eyebrows are furrowed in concentration as he rubs you slowly. His touch is feather-light and almost hesitant which has you wining out for more.

“Jungkook. More pressure. Harder please.” You beg as he speeds up his movements, which have you arching off the bed, eyes rolling back and hands grasping at the sheets below.

He works at a steady pace. You can feel your legs start to shake as he slowly pushes a finger against your entrance. Starting at you for permission.

You nod frantically and when he finally inserts a finger you both swear in unison as your tight walls clamp around his digit.

“More. If you're gonna fuck me I'm gonna need more.” You reply as he slowly shoves in another finger and you feel the slight burn as your body stretches to accommodate him.

Jungkook takes his time working you. His finger still playing with your clit as he slowly thrusts his other fingers inside of you.

Whines and moans are spilling from your lips as you feel a tight coil of pressure snake around your body.

You can feel the beginning of your orgasm and you beg him for more.

He does as he's told and begins to finger fuck you with more force. Which has your body arching off the bed and your knuckles turning white as you grip the sheets harder.

“Cum for me princess. Cum around my fingers.” He mutters as you feel the coil get tighter and tighter. You are on the edge and when he curls his fingers and rubs up against the spot inside you so nicely you let go.

Your body thrashes on the bed as you tip over the edge and cum hard all over his fingers. Jungkook works you through it whispering sweet praise which you can hardly hear over the blood pounding in your ears as you feel euphoria radiate off your body.

He feels you coming down from your high and pulls his fingers out. Not really sure what to do with the wetness he decides to lick it up which has a small moan leaving your lips as you watch him with lust-blown eyes.

Once he is finished he cuddles beside you, just as you did for him as he strokes your hair and whispers sweet nothings in your ear until you come down.

Your hands are shaky as you curl up next to him. Burying your face in his bare chest letting your breathing settle.

“Fuck. Are you sure you've never done that before?” You ask as he lets out a laugh and presses a soft kiss to your temple.

“I think you're a liar Jeon Jungkook. There is no way you haven't done that before. What the fuck.” You whine out as you lift your head to look at him.

He is grinning widely and you still stare at him in disbelief.

“That was my first time. And god you were so hot.” He replies as you stare into his eyes, taking him in wanting to remember this moment.

“Still wanna fuck you though.” He mutters lowly as he grinds his now hard cock into your side, you grin at him before leaning over to your bedside table and grabbing a condom and lube.

He sits up and watches as you tear open the packet. Your hands slightly shaking with nerves as you roll it down on his hard cock.

You apply lube and spread it evenly trying to calm your own breathing.

“How do you want it?” You ask

“I…shit however you want it. Whatever is easiest. I just wanna be inside you.” Jungkook replies as you feel your pussy throb at his words.

“Maybe I'll be on top. Just to get used to your size. You're fucking massive.” You groan as Jungkook's cock twitches against your hand.

“Told you you can't say shit like that.”

You throw a leg over him as you guide his cock to your entrance.

His breathing is already heavy as you slowly sink down, letting the head of his cock slip in and stretch you out.

Even though he did prep you the sting is still there as you sink down on him. Taking your time and taking deep breaths as you go.

He is stroking your hair and breathing deeply as you finally take him all the way down. You shift your hips back slightly to get more comfortable and Jungkook lets out a grunt as his hands come down to rest on your hips holding you steady.

You still your movements and stare at him.

His eyes were blown wide and his lips parted. As if he can't believe this is happening.

You can't believe it's happening yourself.

You feel full to the brim with his cock as you wait for your body to adjust. You can't help but squeeze against him which has him whining and gripping your hips harder.

“You're so tight. Fuck.” He moans out as you bury your face in his neck and let out a shaky breath.

You slowly start to move up and down, trying to get used to the delicious stretch as you keep your face pressed into his neck, pressing hot kisses against the skin as you slowly grind against him.

“Fuck feels s'good.” He slurs out as you begin to pick up the pace, finally feeling the burn start to subside which was replaced with a neediness that you had never experienced before

Jungkook shifts his hips and starts fucking up into you. The tip of his cock hitting your sweet spot and causing your eyes to roll in the back of your head.

“Fuck you're so wet. So tight. Fuck. Shit.” He grits out as he fucks up into you with more force this time. You grind down to meet his thrusts as moans spill from both his and your lips.

You feel the coil of pressure start to build and you know you aren't going to last long.

Not with the sounds Jungkook is making

Not with the way he is thrusting up into you

Not with the way the bed is thumping against the wall.

“Can I go harder?” He asks and you nod desperately as in one swift moment he flips you both over and pins you against the bed.

You let out a gasp as you watch him fuck into you. His hips snapped to meet yours, grunts and moans falling from his lips as he chases his high.

His hair is falling into his face and he never looked more beautiful.

You could feel your orgasm fast approaching and you snaked your arm between your sweaty bodies as you scrambled to find your clit.

Jungkook was fucking you deeply. His balls were slapping against you and by the sounds that were spilling from his mouth you could tell he was close too.

“Not gonna last much longer. Y/N. Fuck.” He moaned out as you rubbed your clit and just his words sent you over the edge.

You whined and arched your body up to his as your orgasm washed over you. Your pussy clenched around his cock as you rode out your high. Your eyes were shut tight and you could still feel Jungkook thrusting up into you as you clenched harder around him.

“Gonna cum, need to cum.” He whined in your ear as you finally came down from your high and watched as he fucked you harder.

His hands prying your legs open wider as he rammed into you.

Your body was still sensitive from your orgasm as you watched him, not being able to tear your eyes away from how hot he looked.

“Cum for me Kook. Be a good boy and cum deep in my pussy.” You whined out as that sent him over the edge and you felt his cock twitch and empty inside the condom.

You did your best to squeeze your muscles as your body milked his.

Jungkook flopped down on top of you with ragged breathing as you both came down from your high.

You stoked his hair as he laid on your chest, cock now softening inside of you as you stared up at the ceiling.

Felling good.

Feeling very well fucked.

He slowly pulled out of you and you whined as he sat up to throw the condom away.

You went to the bathroom and came back with a warm towel as you cleaned the both of you up.

As you were cleaning around the base of his now soft cock Jungkook grabbed your hand.

“Y/N I like you. I like you a lot. Please be my girlfriend.” He asked staring up at you.

You threw the towel at your hamper and cuddled next to him, naked bodies intertwined.

“Thought you'd never ask.” You said pressing a kiss to his temple before you both fell into a post-orgasmic sleep.

#jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook/reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook/reader #bts #bangtan #fanfic #jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook smut #jungkook fluff

[kairiscorner]

he is me and i am him (also i updated my masterlist, i put a jjk section !!)

(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)

he's so sorry he made you cry... kinda. – teen!satoru gojo x reader

summary: he was never a nice guy, you knew that, but even so... he does have a heart, a literal anatomical one; he's just never shown you how much you make it beat like crazy. pairing: teen!satoru gojo x reader genre: lil' bit of angst and a whole lot of comfort and fluff 🫶🫶🫶

satoru gojo is a little shit. well, a head and a half taller than you piece of shit, but who cares? you do, a little bit, but the fact he's so much taller than you isn't what bothered you—it's the fact that he effortlessly makes you feel shitty about yourself.

satoru gojo was the worst guy you ever met, and you've met all kinds of douchebags in your life—but he definitely takes the cake. he's insensitive, crass, lazy... he's everything you hate in a person. you had no idea how anybody could like him. the only reason you hang around him is because you're friends with shoko and geto, no other reason. you'd kick him out if you could, but you didn't wanna hurt the two of them so you just... had to bear him and his shitty attitude.

satoru gojo was so boisterous, he always filled the silence with his stupid jokes and gags that you were surprised anyone would laugh at. he was so noisy... it was like he wanted his voice to be remembered by everyone, especially you.

satoru gojo doesn't know when enough is enough when it comes to you, he assumes that your angry, annoyed face is a face you make when he's doing a good job at riling you up–and it is, but he's yet to understand just how mean he can really be towards you. he thinks that a lot of his jokes towards you always come across the way he wants them to; they're just harmless little jabs at you, no biggie... until he jabs you a little too hard that tears start falling from the corner of your eyes.

satoru gojo knows nothing, nothing, about comforting people when they're crying–he's unsure why you're even crying in the first place. if he wanted to make you cry, he'd've done much worse than just poke some fun at you and tease you for a few of your shortcomings, but he never meant to make you cry. he teased you that you were a crybaby, a sensitive little cutie that gets pissed about everything. turns out, he was partially right, you were indeed expressive with your emotions, but only when they reach the boiling point, and you just... can't take his bullshit anymore.

satoru gojo had never seen you so vulnerable before; he had always thought you were the type to not get so affected by some guy's unsolicited opinion, but he wasn't just some guy to you... he was satoru gojo for crying out loud; and you didn't care if he was some hotshot sorcerer or womanizer or anybody else important or well-known or liked–he was an asshole, he... he shouldn't have affected you this much. you weren't angry at him, at least not anymore, you were more angry at yourself for letting his words get to you.

satoru gojo felt awkward and a bit unsure of what to do as he watched you cry, with you trying your hardest to wipe your tears away amidst you sobbing a whole new batch of tears. it was like his words had cut so deep into your heart that you forgot how to close the faucet of your tears. you were so mad... how could a jerk like him get to you that well?

satoru gojo would've left you right then and there for you to deal with the aftermath of his overstepping, like hell did he want an earful from shoko and geto from his idiocy and insensitivity again, but there was just something about your pathetic little self that gojo felt compelled to deal with, to... console.

satoru gojo hates this feeling, he hates feeling responsible for feelings that aren't even his. you would think that for a guy who gets a lot of praise from people for his looks and abilities, he'd know how to deal with them and get them off his back–but he doesn't. he sighs as he looks away from you, his brows furrowed together in agitation as he tries to settle with himself that he shouldn't stay, he shouldn't try comforting you when he doesn't even have the faintest idea on how to even start.

satoru gojo sighs and groans loudly as he crouches to level with you, rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to collect his thoughts. "oi, crybaby, look at me." he said to you in a snappy voice as you looked up at him with angry eyes, your vision being blurred as the tears obscured your sight. if your goal was to make gojo feel bad, well you were doing a semi-bad job; he doesn't yield to anybody's tears, or at least, he didn't until he became the reason you cried for the first time.

satoru gojo sighed again as he took off his sunglasses, wanting to face you fully, show you he isn't kidding around. you looked away from him again as you buried your face in your palms, your muffled sobs getting louder as gojo approached you. "c'mon now, crybaby... y'know i didn't really wanna make you weep–crying doesn't look good on you." he muttered as he gently grabbed your wrists and pulled them away from your face, seeing your eyes dripping with tears and your nostrils wet with snot.

satoru gojo chuckled as he saw your usually prim and proper face being all disheveled and wet, to believe he was the first guy in a long while to make you sob isn't that unbelievable–and though he felt a small pang in his chest that urged him to cheer you up, he kinda found this other side of you as... kinda adorable.

satoru gojo gently wiped your tears away with the pads of his thumbs, chuckling lowly as he did; muttering how swollen your eyes look now, how they–despite him saying that crying didn't suit you–you looked really pretty with this more somber look on your face. "for a crybaby, you sure look kinda pretty after sobbing. it's pathetic, sure, but... kinda hot as well." he said in a hushed voice that was laced with mischief as he stuck his tongue out at you as you looked at him all angrily, as if you were about to hit him for what he said.

satoru gojo laughed loudly when you said you weren't a crybaby, you just... you just felt a little vulnerable. "yeah, yeah, say what you want to feel better, crybaby. and, so i can see you smile that impish little grin again..." he uttered as he leaned closer to you–his aquamarine blue eyes locking with your own as he stared into the pretty hue of your irises–and says with a wide smirk on his face: "i'm sorry..." and he blows a raspberry at your face and chuckles. "kinda." he ends as he pulls away from you, pinching your cheek all the while. he dons on his sunglasses as he pinches your cheeks again, noticing how bite-able they are. some things just never change, do they? well, at least you heard the satoru gojo speak an apology, even if it was fake, or semi-fake.

#satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #satoru gojo x y/n #satoru gojo imagines #satoru gojo fluff #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen x y/n #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #jjk fluff #jjk imagines #jjk season 2 #jujutsu kaisen season 2

[tan1shere]

Changes pt 3

Ellie Williams x female reader !

A/n: finally what you've all been waiting for, I hope you all enjoy this was such a fun story to write. I feel like I wrote this well, especially the anxiety as I suffer hugely from it, a few techniques in there of how I deal with it if you also struggle <3

Summary: Ellies the bad girl in the school but she takes a liking to the reader, everyone's worried but the reader somehow changes her for the better ... or does she ?

Warnings: MDNI. Smut at end !! Implied rape from a past relationship, anxiety, pet names, SOFT DOM ELS ! mentions of drinking and I think that's it :)

Text: orange-ellie pink-reader blue-angela

The red text is flashbacks which is near the end !!

Masterlist || pt 1 ! , pt 2 !

"It's all an act. Dont fall for any of it."

...

"She's gunna hurt you Y/n."

...

"I'm not a completely great person, maybe I'm working on it I dunno. But I don't date. I can't it's just not in me."

...

"Don't start anything with her, you're too pure for her antics."

...

"She's not changing Y/n, she will hurt you."

...

"We warned you."

It was spiraling in your brain, everyone's words including hers. You felt foolish for thinking you could change her in any way. An absolute fool. Why couldn't you of listened to everyone. All you had was hope. But that died that night, that hope was officially gone for good. You had been curled up in bed all of your Saturday. You hated to admit it but you were crying. Laying in your bed with cold tears staining your face. You had come home from that party in the exact same state.

"Oh, babe.." you heard Angela's voice softly say, bringing you into her embrace. You sunk into the feeling letting out tears. "What's up?" She asks pulling back a little. "Y-you were right. I'm such a fucking idiot." You sob. She was confused. "Woah what, slow down." Her hand rubs on your arms, bringing you with her to sit on the couch. "Me and Ellie. Well we were dating in secret, I'm so sorry for that. But we aren't anymore." She changes her expression to a more serious one. "That fucking wh-" But you didn't even want her to finish that. You knew Ellie had hurt you but it was fairly new, you still had some love for her. As troublesome that may be it was nothing but the truth. You had to get over that tho. You had to.

You were laying on your side, still mulling over those same sentences over and over again. It was like a tiny devil in your brain telling you 'you fucked up' but you soon hear your door creaking open. "I made you some sammies." Angie came in with a sweet smile. Your back was currently facing her and you didn't make any effort in changing that as you let out a dry hm. She lets out a sigh. "I won't watch you starve because of some silly girl who's hurt you. Please." You turn over looking at her. "I'll eat, just not as hungry right now." She walks over setting the plate down on your bedside table, moving to sit on your bed. "You're strong ok? I know you will get past this." You give her a tiny nod. "I might just take a nap." She nods in agreement going to leave. "Good idea."

A few minutes go by when you hear the door. You couldn't make out the voice so you continue to rest on your side. Holding the drawing she did of you in hand, staring at it. All of this, everything just wasted. You couldn't bare to look at it any longer, chucking it in a random direction, deciding to get some rest.

Ellies pov.

The night before:

"Oh this one's going to be a good one I can feel it." I say, examining the crowds of people. It was booming, that's for sure. I look at her, she looked so effortlessly pretty. It stunned me. "You're so silly." She speaks. "Come on let's get a drink." I then say, grabbing her wrist and dragging her gently with me. Her smile was brightening every bad thing in this world. "I'll be the sober help." I smile at her. "Not even one love?" She just shakes her head. "Alright, just make sure you're comfortable yeah?"

It had been maybe an hour into the party and I didn't feel completely with it. Y/n was sitting comfortably in my lap, just looking so beautiful. "Mmm I want another." I slur. And there it was, her gorgeous giggle. "You're so gone Els-" "your laughs so pretty, makes my heart warm." I blurt out suddenly. "Well that's very kind of you." She replies. But as I keep looking at her I could tell something was off, or was I daydreaming? Was the alcohol just messing with my brain. I decide to ignore it, not in my right mind. "Can you pretty please get me another drink my beautiful girlfriend." I watch as she smiles at me, probably replying but the music drowns out not only my thoughts but any formable words. Feeling her get off and leave, I could feel my brain going fuzzy too. But deep down something just didn't feel 100%. I eventually turn my head to look at her, noticing Kenny speaking to her.

That boils my blood. Why can't he just mind his own business? Stop it Ellie, you haven't been angry like this in forever, don't break that streak now. She comes back over handing me my drink, I give her a mumbled thank you. "Was he hassling you?" "Who, Kenny? Nothing I can't handle my love." As I look at her I notice her posture shift, i knew it wasn't her getting comfortable on my lap. Because if anything she looked uncomfortable.

"You alright mama?" I decide to just ask. "I'm just going to go for a pee." She states, beginning to get off. "Oh.. alright love." I'd be lying If I said I wasn't worried, but the other half of me felt dizzy, making me forget slightly what was going on. I shake my head going to get up and get another drink. When I eventually hear shuffling next to me. I turn my attention to see a dirty blonde girl. "Hey." She gently says. It takes me a moment as confusion washes over me. "Hi?" Silence. "You don't remember me?" More silence. Because no, I didn't know who the hell she was, until I take a better look. "Sophy." She smiles. "Ah so you do remember." I somehow felt awkward. "Uhmm yeah." Still really confused on why she's even talking to me. "I missed you." Stunned. "I- huh?" Now I was really baffled. "But- i kinda just left ya." It was bad, but it was the truth, why would she miss me. "Yeah well. You were still hot." I furrow my brows at a loss of words. "I- wha-" When I suddenly feel her lips on mine, I felt all too sober right then as my eyes widen. But before I could push her away- "Ehem." I hear someone clear their throat, I don't even need to turn around to know who it was.

"Fuck.." I mutter, slowly turning to face her. "Wait baby no i-" I began but suddenly my freshly poured drink was being dumped on me. I sigh. "No." She points at me. "Ellie what the actual fuck." I stare at her, saying nothing. Not even knowing what to say. Fuck, it's like it's happening all over again, speak you idiot. My eyes widen as she starts to cry.. ive never seen her cry before, safe to say I never ever wanted to witness it again. "Y/n no no please-" "After everything we've been through, after what you told me. They were wrong. You cant change for anyone. I should've listened to them." I immediately shake my head. It was all wrong. "Don't say that please- it was an accident fuck- she just-" But she cuts me off, shoving the cup into my chest. "Shut up Ellie." And I listen. I couldn't fuck things up any more then i have. Right...

It was silent, after a second or two she soon goes to leave. "Wait-" I start, but it was no use. She was gone in the swarm of people. "Fuck." I curse under my breath. I couldn't let this happen, not her. Not someone who I know I've fallen in love with. God Ellie you should've just told her. I wanted to make this right, after all she was my everything. I stride through the crowds when I spot her. I notice she isn't alone. God, does Kenny ever just fuck off. There's that anger again, but nothing was stopping me this time. I March on over there, pushing him to the ground ignoring all the fallen gasps. "Ellie what the fu-" "He touched you!" I retort. "You bitch." He starts to speak, getting off the floor and making an attempt to hit me, but he misses. "Fight round two then, you fucker." And it begun, the tiny fight between us. But I notice her going to leave. "Wait no- please let me explain!" I yell, grabbing onto her wrist. She immediately pulls back, with anger herself. "No Ellie. Don't ever touch or even speak to me again." "They weren't right, you have changed me i swear to you!" I plead, but she just shakes her head. "Once a dick. Always a dick. You. Have. Not. Changed."

And that was that. I watch as she leaves. I felt so empty like I had just lost my best friend. What the fuck was I going to do.

Missed calls. I called her so many times, I was freaking out. Think Ellie. God. This was suppose to be the one thing I didn't fuck up. I pace in my room, debating on what is the best approach. Nothing. "Come on brain. You can be creative, don't lack in that now!" There was one option. Going to her dorm and trying to talk to her, Angela. There needed to be a backup plan tho, I had no faith in the first one. I flop on my bed with a long sigh. "You made her cry.." it hurt to even look back on, her hurt features. Her anger, but most importantly those glossy eyes. I close mine trying to get the image out, laying on my back still thinking. "Fuck it." I get up and head over to her dorm. Knocking on the door hesitantly, when Angela is suddenly in sight. "Can I spe-" "No." She immediately cuts me off. "But-" "No Ellie you broke her fucking heart. Again. Why do you always do this to people." I stare at her. "This time was an accident I swear-!" She raises a brow. "You accidentally kissed someone? Yeah alright." There was no winning this. "Please just let me talk to her and explain." She looks at me, but not before shutting the door in my face. Great. What now?

It had been a few days later, and there was no sight of her in classes. Which was worrying, knowing how involved she was with the work. It was saddening to say the least. I decided to have a small wind down in the library, wanting to clear my thoughts in the safe space. When I spot her just sitting in a corner, reading. Was I dreaming? I haven't seen her in days. My feet felt like they were glued to the floor, staring. Do I go over? Talk to her? What do I say?

All these thoughts raced through my mind when I just stood up properly, beginning to head over there. I stand for a few moments in hopes she'd see a person's shoes and look up. As her head rises I notice her eyes. Tired. Worn out. Red and puffy. My heart breaks all over again, especially when her soft expression turns into a bitter glance. "I uh-" I sigh scratching my neck. "Can we talk?" There was silence. Not our enjoyable silence that we'd always share. A cold silence. "Nothing to talk about." I swallow hearing her voice for what felt like forever. And it hurt, the pain deep inside her. "Please." Pleading. I just needed to try say something. I bend down getting infront of her view, needing her to look at me. When she does I just pray she hears me out. "Go on." I soften my look, hearing how uneasy her voice was. I know I didn't mean for all of this to happen, but how could I. How could I of let her kiss me at all- my thoughts were cut off when I hear a faint cough. "She kissed me." Great going. "No really? I'm well aware." God damn Ellie. "I just- I mean, I didn't kiss back." "I saw you Ellie, that's such bullshit." I close my eyes. "Ok, well I didn't enjoy it." She scoffs. "So you admit you did kiss her back?" Now I was silenced. Shit. "Uhhh- well- fuck sake."

She shakes her head. "Just leave me alone." She says dryly, getting up from her spot about to leave. I go to grab her, but don't. Wanting to not repeat history. "Please just let me explain more." She bites her lip, and I know she's suppressing tears. "You've said enough." And so I let it be. Letting her walk off and out of the quiet building.

A few weeks. That's how long ago the library incident first happened. I hadn't seen her around since. Had she left.. like Noelle. "No, don't be silly she loves it here she would never. Not because of me, right?" I huff, that had become a habit, talking to myself. I was still on the mission to get her back or atleast explain things. But my brain was bone dry. It was currently the last class of the day, I rested my chin on the desk, still trying to think. "You know Ellie." Dina began. "Why don't you do something nice for her, give her a note saying to meet somewhere, maybe make her some food or-" I shake my head. "This isn't just some ordinary girl." Dina was honestly shocked. I turn my attention to her. "Shes more than that, I have to do something bigger." She pats my shoulder. "Maybe she has changed you Williams, cuz you've never spoken such things about anyone." It's true, she definitely did. "If this was you and Jesse had done this and you still loved him and such, what would you want him to do?" She ponders that question. "Well I suppose I'd want the truth from both. Him and this random girl." My face lights up. Genius! I smile wide going to hug her. "That's brilliant Dina! But- wait. How would I even do that." I ask. "I think you should figure this out on your own, if she really has changed you I think you should know what to do."

"I'm sorry for screwing you over." My words come out rushed, looking at Sophy with so much hope. She just looks at me. "Really?" I nod. "That's very big of you." She states. "Yeah well, just trying to mend past situations." There was a long pause, before either of us spoke. "Hey, I'm sorry for kissing you that night. I'm in no way that kind of person. Maybe when I'm drunk but I didn't even know you were seeing anyone, didn't even know the Ellie Williams ever could to be fair." The confession heals something inside me, letting that hope be reassured. "So you forgive me for being a complete jerk ages ago?" She smiles and nods. "Yeah we're cool." A sigh of relief escapes my lips. "So what's happening with her? Are you two speaking." I shook my head. "Shes mad and upset and to be honest I don't blame her. I did technically kiss you back-" "you didn't actually." I furrow my brows. "Huh-?" So incredibly confused. "But she said she saw it-" Sophy shakes her head. "Well I didn't feel anything. You must've been talking or something beforehand to make it look like you did, but you didn't. I remember most when I'm drunk and you never kissed back. Plus she caught it before it could progress."

Happy was an understatement. "That's incredible, oh my God I could just k-" we give eachother a look. "Yeah no, bad line to use." I let out a slight awkward laugh, making her shake her head with a smile.

She agreed to help me smooth things over and I was forever thankful. "How do we go about this?" She asks. I think for a moment. "Maybe you could knock on her door and ask to speak with her, and maybe clear the air. Might be best if I'm not there so you can talk properly?" "Sounds good, I don't see a problem with that." I let out a breath of relief. "Ok awesome, thank you."

And after an hour or so she was back. "So how'd it go?" I sit up. "What's something she loves?" I was incredibly confused. "Reading, painting, music. Why?" She leans on the wall. "Shes a kind person, I think she forgave the fact I had apologized, but I reckon you should now do something so she can forgive you completely." I let that sink in and I knew just the thing.

Readers pov

It had been a long day, stressful classes, tons of work. Thank fuck it was a Friday and you could wind down again. You were currently snuggled up on the couch, watching some random cheesy romcom on the TV. Considering it was a Friday that meant Angela was at her boyfriends, so dorm all to yourself. You're brought back out from your thoughts to a knock at your door. Odd. Who on earth. As you open it you spot a girl, not really even processing when you suddenly remember. "Hi, can we talk quickly?" You were shocked nonetheless. What was she even doing here. You let her in anyway, your intrigue getting the better of you. You both make your way over to the couch in silence. "I would like to apologize for kissing something that didn't belong to me." She begins. You on the other hand stay silent and let her finish. "I was drunk- and that's never an excuse, but I do, do crazy shit when I am, I'm not that kind of person sober." There was a silence for a moment. "Doesn't excuse how she acted tho. I appreciate your apology." She nods. "Well if it's any constellation, she never kissed me back." That just confuses me. "Wait she didn't?" She shook her head. "I can assure you. It was just my goofy ass's doing." It only makes you feel a little silly for not knowing the whole story. "I feel embarrassed-" "don't, if anything i probably would've done the same, besides she didn't have the best track record did she? It's no surprise you'd assume." You're now the one to shake your head. "I shouldn't of, I should've let her atleast try and explain."

"Thank you for coming to clear it up with me." You say, escorting her out the door. "Of course, only right thing to do." You nod, giving her a smile. "Although I would've liked her to of come to do so- I know she's tried but I dunno- you think shes given up on trying to fix this?" She lets out a tiny laugh. "Far from that, give it some time yeah? If you know Ellie she never half asses things she loves." You just hope that's true.

It had been a few days later. Two to be exact. And you were currently on your way back to your dorm room. You were about to get your keys when you realize it's already open. "Angie?" You begin, but once you open the door you're greeted by those green eyes. That pale, freckled skin. "Ellie-" You breathe out, setting your things down. Wondering what on earth she's doing here. You notice a few things, like her guitar, then you suddenly smell food. "What is all this." "My apology." You let her continue knowing you had been a bit hard on her. "I made your favorite meal, and I know you were busy today as it was a Friday, so let me take care of you. I'm going to play your favorite song as you relax." Your gaze softens. No one had ever done this for you. Ever. So it melts your heart completely. "Here, come sit." She gestures. You go over to the couch, sitting down as she prepares her guitar, situating it properly in her lap. She begins to play the song Fade Into You by Mazzy Star, your entire face lights up. It hadn't been this bright in awhile, and Ellie seeing that makes her truly happy. Once the song finishes she looks at you. That comfortable silence being back and better than anything. "I- that took me maybe a week to learn, and honestly it wasn't easy but its the easiest song I've ever had to lea-"

But she was cut off by you kissing her. She missed it so much, how soft and safe your lips felt against hers. She was happy again. You pull back to get a look at her. "No one's ever done anything like that for me." She smiles wide. "I've never done anything like that for anyone." She states. "Well I'm glad I was the one." Another comforting silence. "You are the one." Your heart skips a beat at her words, just hearing them makes you giddy inside. "You really think so?" She shakes her head, making you furrow your brows in confusion. "I know so." And that sudden worry was gone again. All you wanted was to kiss her, she got the feeling. Setting the guitar down and bringing you closer. Kissing you so sweetly. You both part. "Well let's eat I bet you're hungry." You nod. "Starved." Your hand reaches out grabbing the plate of pasta. "Smells amazing, I didn't know you cooked." She laughs. "Again with the assuming my love." You put your hands up in your defense. "Didn't say you didn't look like the type to! ... although." A cheeky grins spreads across your face. She lets out a chuckle going to lightly hit your arm. "You're a menace." You begin to eat the meal, and it wasn't too bad. Had all the good flavorings, the perfect amount of cheese which she knew. "No one knows me as well as this, it's quite special to me." She puts her plate down to speak. "No one?" You shook your head. "Not even my parents."

She looked shocked. "Well, glad I could be the one who listens properly. Even though it truly isn't a hard thing to do." You nod at her statement. "You are a good listener. You know how I can tell?" "How?" She leans back intrigued, you take a moment. "Whenever I talk about something and I forget what we were talking about, you always will remind me of the exact thing in best detail that I was speaking of. And always it rejogs my brain. That is how I know you're truly listening." She smiles at you. "You're so cute." The compliment makes you blush, hard. "I missed you." You blurt. "I missed you too angel, so much you have no idea."

That night had been the most relaxing night of your life. It ended with her sleeping in your bed cuddling you until you fell asleep, the safeness you felt was undeniable. It was a regular Tuesday, not too busy but also not so quiet. It all went down hill with the last assignment you got, since you had been a bit out of it recently. You must admit you were slacking. It's not like you at all but you were determined to redeem yourself. That is until the project was due in 2 days. A project this big, no way in hell you were getting it done by then. Not unless you stayed up all night and day. It didn't help that you had classes ontop of that. Stress started to arrive as you go over the assignment. You were currently at the library, skimming it over and over. You begin to bite your lip, chewing and searching for any loose skin as that seemed to help you in some way. It's like a calming technique you picked up through the years, although the consequences aren't so calming. You would forever get ulcers that prevented you from eating because of the infuriating pain. You needed to stop doing it truth be told. You were pulled from the slight manic reading when Ellie is heard. "Hey baby, whatcha doin." She sits down across from you. "Just this assignment." You give her a smile. "How was your day?" You ask her.

"Pretty boring, but hey. Not anymore." She smiles at you now too. "Wanna do something later, you can come over and we can just chill." God that sounded nice but you knew you had to decline. "You can do this and maybe I draw or practice guitar, whatever suits you." God she was so sweet and thoughtful. "That's such a beautiful offer, Els but I think I'm just going to go back to my room to try finish this." And Ellie being Ellie she was agreeing. "Ofcourse yeah! Let me know if you need some company at all." She goes to get up, but before leaving giving you a kiss. "Bye baby." You kiss her back. Once she's left you look back at the work. "Right, let's go." You say packing it up and heading to your dorm.

"Hey." Angie says coming in. "I made some food it's out there if you want it." You nod, focusing on all the papers on your bed. "Whats all this?" You look at her. "Just some work I needa catch up on." She looks at it, then you. "Ok, well please eat." "Uhuh." You didn't take your eyes off of the sheets of paper, scribbling a few words on it. She let out a sigh which you hadn't even heard her do. She leaves soon after, closing the door.

8:01

-Hey sweetheart, just checking in. Making sure everything's ok. :)

You had been so engrossed that you hadn't even felt your phone go off, let alone hear the damn thing.

8:37

-hey sorry, yeah everything's going fine.

-want that company?

-you know, yeah. I'd love that, that sounds nice.

-be there soon. <3

You stop for a moment letting out a breath, you were looking through everything when your face drops, realizing you had completely missed a whole section. "Fuck." You curse going to grab it. There was absolutely no way you were finishing this on time now, you hadn't even seen it how are you going to put this in all of a sudden. "God damn it." "Everything alright?" You jump at the sound of Ellies voice. She holds a hand out. "Woah- didn't mean to startle you it's just me." You shake your head. "Sorry- just a bit jumpy I didn't expect you yet." You reply. She looks at your bed. "This is alot of work." You sigh, trying your hardest to stay positive. You turn your focus on her. "You brought your sketch book." She smiles going to sit in your desk chair. "Sure did, needed to do some doodling." You nod at her, going to continue to figure out what to do with this crap. "What's all this even for?" She asks. "English. Kinda stupid but oh well." Her brows furrow. "You love English tho." "Mmm, I do. But not when it's like this.." you sigh again. "You alright tho?" You nod at her question, flashing a smile. "Yeah, I'm good." She smiles at your own, going to start to draw.

The next night was harder, the whole day was. Trying to find spare time to get more done. It was nearly impossible. Your stress was increasing, making your anxiety appear. You were tearing your hair out in your bedroom. "Hey, have you eaten today?" You hear Angela's faint voice. "Mhmm." You lie. She huffs. "Im worried about you." Your eyes never leave your page. "Well I'm all good in the hood." You slightly joke around by saying that silly saying. "I'm serious Y/n. You hardly have a break from that." That went straight over your head not even hearing what she's saying. She sighs going to close the door again.

-can you please come over.

-why what's up?

-she's freaking me the fuck out, she's not eating I don't even think shes fucking slept, I notice shes been acting incredibly off and it's very worrying.

-slow down, why do you think all this?

-the food from last night was still sitting out this morning. She said she'd eat it and she hasn't. Her eyes are so bloodshot I could see from the millisecond she looked at me. Her bags were prominent too.

-oh Jesus.

-please come over here, I think she really needs you right now.

-I'll be over right away.

Your breath was shakey as you talk to yourself about what you had to do. Your room was a complete and utter mess. Paper, pens, folders. Everywhere. You were so engrossed by it you hadn't even heard your door open. "Y/n?" You heard, you turn your attention to the voice. "Hm?" She saw. Ellie saw what Angela was talking about. "Angie said you haven't eaten." You wave her off. "Can't." She was confused. "And why not?" You pull your lip down to the unsurprising ulcer that had formed. You let your lip rest back, getting back to your studying. "Well I'm going to go reheat the food I'll be right back." You give her another hum, not focusing on a word that came out her mouth. When all of a sudden, the stress was just gone. Your face sits still. Uh oh. That stress had now been replaced with anxiety. Shit. You couldn't let her see you like that. You had to stay calm. But once a panic attack occurred. There was no stopping it. Your breathing became more heavier, taking in breaths to hopefully get that heavy feeling that was on your chest away. No use. It only made things worse, making you freak out again. You felt like you couldn't breath, grabbing onto your sheets feeling tears start to come. Your entire body shaking from the arising panic attack, but also from the lack of sleep. It was going to catch up eventually. It just had to be now. "It might be a bit too hot so just-" Ellie begun. But immediately put the bowl down on your nightstand.

Her movements were speedy coming to crouch down infront of you. She watched you cry your heart out, breathing as if there wasn't air. "Hey hey hey hey, look at me baby." You shake your head, never wanting her to see this. "Please." Her gentle touch makes you reluctantly do so, still letting out streams of tears, shaking uncontrollably. "Shhh." She softly let's out, rubbing your knee. "I-i can't. I can't breathe-" She stands up gently grabbing your hand and putting it to her chest. "Yes you can, youre ok I swear to you. See?" You look at her then your hand, still freaking out slightly, you can feel a ramble about to approach. "This stupid work- Its- suppose to b-be done by tomorrow and I'm nowhere near done. I can't fuck this up because I had been slacking because of everything- and then I messed up on this last night, I h-have absolutely no time during the day because of other classes everything's so messy and I don't know what to do." You sob more. Her heart shatters at your unsteady voice and sobs. She wants to hug you but also doesn't want to overwhelm you even more. "Slow down yeah, once you take a small breath you'll be ok, trust me?" She squeezes your hand reassuringly, letting you know she's right there. "Youre safe. You're going to be just fine. I'm right here." Her voice was so delicate, you let your mind listen to it feeling the sobs begin to slow. "That's it there you go. Can I give you a hug sweet girl?"

You nod at her kindness, wrapping your arms around her torso and resting your head on her chest. She softly kisses your head hugging you tightly. Your grip also tightens not wanting to let go. "Can we stay like this?" You mumbled into her hoodie. "As long as you need angel." Your eyes close, listening to her steady heartbeat. Feeling that tiredness take over. "Can you try eat a small bit before you get some well needed rest, please?" You nod sheepishly, pulling back but still keeping close to her. "Can you stay with me tonight.." Your voice was unsteady but you honestly didn't care you were more than comfortable with her seeing you like this, you thought you wouldn't be, infact you worried about it for nothing. Maybe that's the same for alot of silly things you stress over. "I still dunno what I'm going to do about this stupid work." Your head lowers, looking at your hands in your lap. She thinks for a bit. "Leave it to me ok?" Your eyes move to look at her. "No no, it's ok-" "Please baby. Let me help you." Her hands gently grab your cheeks, and you just give her a nod. "Good, let's get you to eat then some rest hm?"

It was probably a few months that had gone by, you and Ellie were stronger than ever. Doing so well. You were currently over at hers, her roommate being out, you two were just hanging about in her bed. Laughing, smiling, talking. It was a lovely way to spend your evening together. When she turns to you. "Hey pretty girl." She smirks slightly, glancing ar your lips. "Hello." You reply cheerful. You notice her eyes, wanting to kiss her, leaning in to do so. Her hands sneak to the small of your back as the kiss was slow but heated, with intense passion. "Have you." Kiss "Ever thought." Kiss .. kiss - it slowly moves to your jaw. "About sex." And your eyes go ghost. Your mind runs, your heart pounds. Because no you haven't and there's a divine reason why. "I know I have."

"Don't move you little bitch."

You swallow. "I uhm- I dunno exactly." You could tell Ellie was in the mood, and her kisses were so nice-

"Absolutely pathetic, and you're letting this happen."

You blink furiously. "You make me so happy." The kisses continue, and you freeze. Just like all those years ago. "Youre so pretty baby." Your heart rate picks up again. Your anxiety peeking. "E-ellie.." You wanted to try to tell her. Considering you haven't mentioned it yet. "Mmm?" Her kisses move down to you neck, everything was soft but..

"Dumb. Fucking. Cunt."

You could feel slight tears. "Is this ok?" She asks. And when you don't respond she asks again. "Baby?" Then suddenly she feels something wet hit her nose. "My love?" She looks up this time, seeing the small tears. "Hey, hey." Her voice was velvet, making more tears fall. If anything you weren't as scared to do sex all over again, you felt so incredibly safe with her, and remembering all those flashbacks just proved how new all this was. It felt foreign. "Talk to me pretty." She goes to softly stroke your hair. "Was it something I said?" You just shake your head wrapping your hands around her wrist gently. "You're perfect." A silence. "Then why are you crying sweetheart." Her voice was as tender as her touch and you knew you were in love with this woman. "Because you're perfect." She smiles brightly. "Years ago, I was with this girl. We were together for 2 years when near the end she got incredibly toxic with me. And she well in some words-" You didn't even need to finish your sentence, Ellie knew and immediately hugged you. You returned it tightly, like you always did. That silence came back and it was incredibly comforting. "I love you." You hear her voice whisper in your ear. Pulling back to look at her a little surprised. "You don't have to say it b-" But you cut her off bringing her in for a kiss again. "Yes." That confused her. "I've thought about it with you and yes." Then the smiles return, and so do the heated kisses.

After a short while she moved to be more ontop of you but stops briefly. You look at her, she looks way too good right now. "Can I eat you out angel." Her face was close to yours but the way she asked only turned you on more, the fact she's such an angel with this all is an even bigger turn on for you. "Please do." You breathe. Feeling her slowly take off your shirt, she looks at your breasts admiringly. "You're flawless." You felt heat rise to your cheeks, but not because you were anxious or anything, because your whole body felt like it was heating up, all because of how loving she was. She moves her lips to kiss one slowly turning into a gentle suck, around the skin and on your hardened bud. You breathe out, but even that sounded pretty to Ellie. Making her close her eyes at everything right now. She couldn't get enough of you. "You're so beautiful, so incredibly pretty." She blabs on. Her kisses move down your stomach. Keeping with her tender like touch. She slowly but surely pulls your pajama pants down along with your underwear. She takes a moment to take this all in. "Want to take my time yeah? Promise it's not in a teasing way. You truly don't deserve that especially not right now. Just want to savor hm?" You nod, biting your lip ever so slightly.

"You sure it's ok mama?" She rubs circles on the fat of your thigh. You give her a nod but she shakes her head. "Wanna hear you verbally say it, please?" Your smile grew. "Yes Ellie I promise its ok, please do it." Your soft voice made her smile grow. "Angel girl.." She began, gently stroking your clit. Your breath hitches at the feeling. "Need to make you feel good, gotta." Her mouth slowly comes down to you, licking softly. Delicately. That then turns into sucking and she did not disappoint. She in fact was making you feel good. Amazing even. She keeps the pace, eventually looking up at you and the way you'd react to everything. When you felt her tongue go in you, you lost it entirely. Your mouth hung open with so much pleasure everything felt so natural. It always did. "Mmm, knew you'd be as sweet tasting.. such a perfect girl." You let a moan slip. "E-ellie i-" "Mhmm, feel you clenching on my tongue. I got you baby. I got you." This woman didn't make you last long at all but in hindsight. You were not at all complaining. Because as you began to cum, you feel the most incredible orgasm approaching. You felt content, safe. Secure. "Thereee you go Angel. Atta girl." She mumbles letting you ride out your high on her tongue. "Mmm Ellie please I need you so bad." She licks her lips coming up to your face. "Yeah love?" You nod. She goes to take off her clothes, going to get back ontop of you.

But she stops again. "Why don't we try this." She goes to lay down on her back getting you to straddle her. "You be in control okay? I'm right here to help. Just want to make sure this is perfect for you. All I want." You look at her lips, leaning down to kiss them. Her hands tangle in your hair, giving you a tender scalp massage as the two of you kiss. You situate so your pussys directly on hers, not moving just yet, going to sit up a bit. You begin to move shortly after. Watching as you both open your mouths. Her soft grunt made your stomach do flips. "You're so perfect Els.." Your breath became uneven, in the best way possible. She looks down at the two of you then back at your face, your features. "God your ethereal." Another moan escapes you as you speed up. "Good girl, doing so good." The praise went straight to your core helping egg your orgasm on. "C-Can we cum together, please?" Her heart fluttered at your words. "Ofcourse my angel. Wouldn't want anything more than to do so." Your pace picked up again, letting more moans slip from your pink lips. "So well, so incredibly good. Fuck." You knew she was getting close you could just tell. And so were you. Her hands rest on your thighs, squeezing the flesh. "Ready mama?" You nod with her, cumming with moans. Grunts. Of eachothers names even. As you rode out your high making sure Ellies was met too, your body became weak. Flopping onto her torso. "I love you, Ellie." You say back from about 30 minutes ago. Her smile was like it was tattooed onto her face. "You truly have changed me, Y/n.. and for the better." You close your eyes. Feeling yourself drift of to sleep. She kisses your head, stroking your hair gently. "Wanna marry you some day even.."

:))

#elliewilliams #ellie the last of us #ellie williams #ellie tlou #ellie x reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie williams smut #ellie williams the last of us smut

[jennamoran]

The Rats of the Far Roofs

Hi!

Today I'm going to talk a little bit more about my forthcoming RPG, the Far Roofs. More specifically, I want to talk about one of its key elements:

The rats.

So it's part of the story of this game that at some point, without that much fuss and bother, a bunch of talking rats sailed to your town and basically moved in. (Possibly by a far roofs waterway, if your home is landlocked.) Rats live fast, so if you're old enough, you might have been there for that first arrival, but they've been here for generations now.

They live mostly on the roofs.

They live, in short, between our mundane world below and the magical Far Roofs beyond, and accordingly they're a little magical, a bit idealized, but mostly just a kind of people.

I like rats, so they're mostly physically just rats. I figured they needed to be a fair bit larger to have practical presence, so they're about twice the normal length. I wanted them to be able to walk upright and use tools and wear clothes and things like that, so their spines and hands and voice boxes are a little different to allow those things. ... I'm not a biologist, though, so I won't do any kind of deep dive into those details.

What are they there for?

They add delight to the game.

They're a good source of exposition and guidance.

... but the most important structural thing they do is setting tone.

So the game is set in a world that's basically our own. It isn't until you get up onto the roofs that that really changes. In fact, going up onto the roofs isn't enough; you have to traverse them a while, you have to go from one roof to another until they begin to bleed together and the world starts to turn magic, before you get to the Far Roofs themselves.

In between, with the mundane world below them and the Far Roofs beyond them, you have the rooftop homes of the rats. For the rats, it's just a normal place, but for the humans, it's liminal. From the human perspective, the rats live pretty much directly between the mundane world and magic.

And that means that the rats are in a position, both physically and conceptually, to set the tone for the world beyond. To mediate the experience of magic and define the presentation of the Far Roofs.

I've said before that the mood of this game is based on those times when you're really changing things up in your life, new jobs, new homes, new people, whatever: times when everything is scary and hopeful and new.

And so the biggest thing the rats do in the game, like, as a game and story element, is take a magical hidden world that could easily drift into being horrific or pedestrian and actively, willfully code it as an adventure.

As a moving-forward in life, and in the world.

They're the ones who believe with a kind of relentless determination that both you, and they themselves, can handle the Far Roofs. That it's a place of wonder more than horror. That things can be okay, even if they're not okay right now.

The best half of the experience of changing your life, going outside your comfort zone, moving forward, whatever, is the people who make that change worthwhile, and that's what the rats are in this game to be. They're the people you're amazed sometimes that you were lucky enough to get to know, because you got involved in all of this. The people who're effortlessly competent in the new domain while you're still flailing and completely lost. The rats are there to be someone to laugh and delight with, amidst all the magic of the roofs.

Of course, they are also ... rats.

They live years, not decades. Their position in our world below is tenuous. They're very small.

It doesn't mean that they're wrong that things'll be okay, or anything. It doesn't mean they aren't fierce and smart and casually adept at facing the dangers of the roofs. Their hearts and courage are bigger than their bodies.

It's just a bit of perspective, is all.

They're rats. They're little, unimportant, and oft maligned. They're the kind of fantasy heroes, in short, who could be living and adventuring basically right next door (or, well, above), constantly struggling against apocalyptic horrors, and still have most people wave it off as exaggerated, or as not even real.

... those are, anyway, some of the things going on with the rats of the Far Roofs RPG, also known (after their first home) as the rats of Fortitude.

#the far roofs #jenna moran #rpgs

[geekynightowl1997]

Okay, so I finished re-watching Leverage Season 1... well minus The Second David Job, but I remember alot of that episode.(just to make sure I have everything semi-correct. Obviously my goal is to have ALL correct- but I am aware that I miss things.)

So- let's talk Leverage and Leverage Redemption. Let's discuss the characters, cons, and just- everything shall we?

As many of you know- my favorites hand down are Eliot, Hardison, and Parker. There's just something safe and comforting about their friendship/relationship. There is just something easy going about the three. From the very beginning- they worked together effortlessly. They connected well with each other and you don't see that a lot. Each of them had their part to play and they didn't overstep the boundaries of each other. Like Hardison didn't play the hitter or thief- that wasn't his job. Eliot didn't play the thief or hacker nor did Parker play the hitter or hacker. And if they did- isn't wasn't to take control; it was because they were in a jam and desperate to get the team out safely.

Now- Nate, Sophie, and Harry are my next favorite. Nate was definitely the drunk dad. However- he wasn't dangerous and Sophie did an excellent job of keeping him in line. Would he make snide remarks at times? Absolutely. Did he push to hard at times? Yes he did. But if you think about it- it was good for this ragtag team. Nate knew what they could do- what he wanted to know was- what was their breaking point. How far could he push- before they all had enough? (I'm pretty they each had their moments- but like Eliot said once; "Nobody tells me to walk away. I decide that.") Nate was a good mastermind. Sophie is definitely the annoyed/exasperated mom. Not only does she have to cut off unnecessary arguments between the children- but she has to deal with a drunk father. She's good with people. Knowing what they want and how to give it to them. That's her job to know people. It's how she's survived so long. Harry is definitely the struggling uncle. This man doesn't know where he fully stands. All he knows is; he's done a lot of bad in this world- and he wants to be redeemed. What better way then to be a good bad guy. If Nate see's the world in black and white- than Harry see's it in shades of grey with blobs of color.

Now- I don't know how you all feel- BUT I'm not a huge fan of Breanna. For me- she's like that annoying cousin that follows the older cousins. She's just too much all at once. I understand that she wants to prove herself- but she just felt like she took over the whole room. It wasn't that she didn't have anything to bring to the table- it's just... she was a lot. ( I don't know how else to describe it.)

Over all- I love Leverage and I'm on the fence about Leverage Redemption. I love how they all work together. How it's literally a family.

I love how they don't know how to work together- but still seem flawless at working together. I love that easy going banter between the OT3. How Eliot allows Parker to poke, prode, and put hats on him. How Parker feels safe around Eliot. I love how Hardison and Eliot respect Parker. Sure she might be crazy- but only they can say that. Only Eliot can say that Parker has something wrong with her. That Hardison understands Parker? I love that! The way Hardison isn't really that upset with Eliot whenever he does geek speak and Eliot is all huffy. Or how Hardison does his own way of poking and proving Eliot. (I love these three your honor! I do.)

I love how Eliot isn't afraid to call Nate out. How Nate isn't afraid to push... as long as he puts himself in the same position. I love how they aren't huge fans of Sophie's acting- but are impressed with her acting. I love how they get so use to each other.

I love how they don't mind ribbing each other! The ribbing doesn't even change when Harry and Breanna join. They all do it. It's what makes them a family.

The cons are just as flawless as the characters. There are certain episodes that resonates with me. Just like there are episodes that resonate with you all. And they just give me hope that everything will be okay. The Low Low Low Price Job and The Belly of the Beast Job are the two that affect me the most. Though they aren't my favorites. Still, they pull it off and it gives me hope. Makes me feel all fuzzy and warm. Their criminals- and their looking out for the little guy. Watching the team actually care about the clients helps humanize them.

Lastly- I love their quips. The quotes they say. I can't tell you how many times I quote the team. Between things like; "No stabbing." To "You think she dresses like a nun for no reason?" "It's Parker." To "Not Lucille! Get that look outta your eye." To "Parker made me do it." To "You do trust me, don't you Eliot?" To the more heartfelt ones like: "We are all addicts! We are addicted to our past!" And "Depends on the torture, depends on the man." And "I'm not crazy!" (I can't think of any Harry and Breanna quotes at the moment.)

Watching this show- it makes me feel like I'm part of the team. It makes me feel like I'm apart of the family. And I so want to be.

Finally, Leverage is the literal definition of the saying; "Blood of the covenant is strong than the water of the womb."

If anybody ever asks me for a found family recommendation: Leverage is it!

Thoughts anyone?

#leverage #leverage redemption #eliot spencer #parker #alec hardison #sophie devereaux #nate ford #christian kane #aldis hodge #beth reisgraf #gina bellman #timothy hutton #noah wyle #aleyse shannon #essay #leverage essay #leverage redemption essay #they are a found family who loves each other and gets on each others nerves #but they wouldn't actually hurt each other #ot3 would never hurt each other #i view them as platonic btw #well minus hardison and parker those two are definitely dating #nate is the drunk dad sophie the exasperated mother #eliot and hardison are brothers #parker and eliot are sister/brother #harry is the struggling uncle and breanna is the cousin #im not a huge fam of breanna #im sorry #but they are a family #i rewatched season 1 so that i could write this out

[angelltheninth]

An Emperor's Rage

Pairing: Vi x Emperor!Reader

Tags: angst, blood and injury, hurt/comfort, hurt Vi, protective Reader

Word count: 1.5k

Ao3

A/N: This work was a commission written for @imma-write-stuff. It was a delight to write. More Vi content is always good.

It wasn't unusual for Vi to be sneaking into your bedroom, at this point it was practically a routine, a normal date night.

"You know I have a door right?" You sigh as you get up from your table, still stacked with all sorts of papers and potential dealings. You hear Vi snicker behind you.

"I would if your guards didn't ask me if I had any weapons every time. Don't you have a list or something I can get on and just walk in and out when ever I want?" Vi leaned on the desk, her arms crossed over her chest, "I mean these people do what ever you say right?" There was still a bit of that snark that she had when you first met Vi.

"Within reason. There are protocols in place for a reason Vi." And you like security protocols, they kept you alive ever since you became the ruler of your empire. Which was fairly early in your life so you've grown to have an appreciation for your guards. But you also have an appreciation for Vi's ability to sneak past them seemingly effortlessly.

There was a lot of tension between the two of you at first. Vi thought you were just like other nobles, having everyone dote on you day and night, it was always your way or else. You like to think you're a better ruler than that, you want to keep your people safe yes, but not at the cost of them hating or fearing you because of the power that you hold. It took many months for Vi to let her guard down around you properly and for both of your affections to start coming trough.

"So what's all this?" Vi leans over your shoulder to look at the papers.

You sigh, tired, "We have a representative coming over from Zaun in a few days. The thing is there's no proper intel on them other than what Silco feed us." You glance up and see Vi's eyes narrow at Silco's name. By now you know the ugly history she had with the industrialist and crime lord.

"Why not just lock him up then. Better yet let me have some alone time with him, I bet I can get him to talk." Vi punched her fist into the palm of her hand, making her muscles flex.

"I wish it was that simple. Unfortunately we can't just act on a whim. We have to at least hear him out. Especially since we don't even know what he's coming here for. I did give the order to monitor him though." You reach up for Vi's hand, running your thumb over the back of her hand. It seemed to soothe the brawler but you could still tell that she was not happy with this.

Vi quickly leaned down to kiss your cheek, "Well I hope you know what you're doing, your majesty." She stepped away and bowed dramatically.

"Huh? Wait, aren't you staying the night?" Vi is already half way out the window by the time you turn around.

"You've been signing papers the whole day. Get some sleep yeah? I'll go... investigate." Before you can protest Vi winks at you, pulls up her hood and starts scaling down the side of the palace.

It's been a few days since then and you're starting to get worried. There's been no word from Vi or the Zaun representative.

You were about to go out and search for by yourself when there's a knock on your window. Your breath catches in your lungs when you turn a see a bloody and bruised Vi outside.

"Fuck, Vi!" You rush to the window to open it and as soon as you do Vi collapses into your arms, almost sending you toppling on the floor, "Vi? Vi! What happened? Where were you?! Who did this?! Vi?! Your yelling summons your guards who charge into your room, only to see you barely holding on to Vi as she threatens to crumble onto the floor.

"Emperor Y/N! What is going on?! How did she get in?! Are you hurt?!" One of the guards scans the room quickly,

"Am I hurt?! Vi is bleeding out, call the doctors now! And check everywhere around the palace for anyone suspicious, if you see them arrest them immediately!" The guards all nod and a few of them rush out while the others stay behind and ways for the doctors to arrive.

"Zaun..." Vi manages to choke out, her mouth full of blood, "Motherfucker had a whole ambush. Silco... sent..." Vi passes out before she could say anything else but you got what she was trying to say. Your blood boiled with rage.

Silco sent his men here, to kill Vi. There was no business deals or anything of the sort to be made, just Silco wanting to finish what he started years ago.

As soon as the doctors arrived they took Vi to a separate room to patch her up. She was badly beaten but nothing life threatening. You spend the entire night by her side as she slept.

It didn't take long for the Zaun representative to be tracked down and brought to the palace. In the morning you ordered him to be brought to your throne room. Looked smug, which only served to anger you further.

"You attacked one of my trusted bodyguards under the guise of business treaties. What do you have to say for yourself?" You tried to keep yourself calm, your expression neutral.

"Bodyguard? Oh please, even us over in Zaun know that you're fucking her. It was a surprise actually, you're an Emperor, can't you get laid with anyone better? It doesn't really matter to me though, I'm just here to do a job, the brawler is just a bonus for me." The man snickered and spit on the floor. Your eye twitched in anger.

You still kept your voice calm, "I don't think it's any of your, or anyone else business who I bring to bed. And it is irrelevant for this conversation. This a clear breach of Zaun's contract with us, and your boss, Silco can consider himself cut off from any of our trade routes. Now..." Your eyes darken, "What to do with you? You who attacked someone who you clearly knew had some sort of importance to me. You're not a very good representative. Do you have a death wish?"

The man said nothing but you could see him beginning to sweat. He either didn't think Vi was really that important to you or he hoped to finish the job right away.

You motion for your guard to move in on him.

"Hold on... are you really going to do this? I'm a Zaun representative. If you hurt me, Silco..." You raise your hand to stop him.

"Silco already sealed your fate when he sent you to hurt Vi. Do you understand?" He's shaking now, you can see the fear in his eyes as you snap your fingers. One of the guards punches him across the face so hard one of his teeth fly out. "You have bruises on your face, I imagine your friends are in an even worse shape. Now do you want to tell me who they are? Who else did Silco hire?"

The man just spits blood on the floor and stares at you. He's scared, but he's obviously scared of Silco more.

You nod at your guards. Just as another one gets ready to deliver another punch, Vi walks in trough the door, still in a pretty bad shape but with a fire in her eyes.

"Vi. What are you doing here? You're supposed to be..."

"Dead." The man says.

Vi grit her teeth at the man. "You're glad you still have all..." She stopped when she noticed the tooth, "Most of your teeth. But when I.." Vi groaned in pain as she flexed her muscles.

"Alright, enough. Guards, take this man to a jail cell, find out who he's working with." The guards all nodded and dragged the man out, he was cursing the whole way.

You let out a heavy sigh as you walk towards Vi. Her face is bruised so you're careful with the way you touch her, "Vi... please just go and get some rest. I'll handle this. It's my job."

Vi scoffs, "Right. You have to show everyone that you're a tough Emperor and show your might and..."

"No. I mean you." You place a gentle kiss on Vi's lips, her eyes widening in surprise, "I mean protecting you. Like you protect me."

Vi's eyes softened and she melted into your touch, much like a cat. You chuckle and give her another kiss.

"Come on. Let's get you back to bed. I'll take the day off. The guards can call us if they find anything out. We can spend the day together. As long as you don't do anything too strenuous." You give her another quick peck on the lips.

Vi grins at you, "You're a sap."

"Don't let anyone else know, love." You wink and lead her back to her room.

#arcane #arcane x reader #vi #vi x reader #league of legends #league of legends x reader #arcane fanfic #league of legends fanfiction

[niskoo]

[08:12]

pairing: rival! sunghoon x reader

genre: fluff, slight angst (like if you squint), slight crack, ice skating!AU

warnings: self doubt?

word count: 556 words

a/n: I swear i'll study after this there is something about writing for enha when finals are coming literally my first few works were days before finals and Im pulling it again wtf

networks: @enhypennetwork

Park Sunghoon was someone who you found was always fun to be around, but you would never admit it. Not when you know he'd get so smug if he heard such words come from you.

He was always your rival, from childhood, you would both have the same sessions (though different coaches) and always try to be better than the other. It was quite entertaining, really, but sometimes it gets hard when someone comments about how his skills are better than yours, how you need to catch up.

You know you don't, he knows it too, and yet just the thought of other people noticing and commenting about it has a certain clench to your heart.

And earlier today, you couldn't help but overhear how your coach said you needed more training if you wanted to get into more competitions. And you have to say, that did a lot to your pride.

And right now, you don't think it's fun to be around anyone. Especially not Park Sunghoon who's jumping and spinning so effortlessly.

Sunghoon finds it strange how you're not spinning in the air either, you would most likely try to top off his toe loops and axels, and yet there you are, staring at your water bottle with a twisted face. What happened?

That's exactly what Sunghoon asked as he sat next to you on the benches, and unlike all the other times, his voice is soft, gentle, and genuine. You're not one bit used to it, but you do appreciate it.

You sigh and look back down at the plastic water bottle in your hands, your fingers going white with the extra squeeze you give it.

Should you tell him? How would he react? Sad? Smug?

If Park Sunghoon sounds genuine, he must feel genuine too, right?

You decide to take the chances and tell him, "Coach said I have a small chance of getting into competitions, and I don't know what to do."

Sunghoon is very much shocked at what upset you, because he knows for a fact that you're more than capable of competing—winning. How could your coach ever doubt you?

"I guess... I just haven't been feeling myself lately." You say truthfully. It's a bit weird to have such a normal conversation with Sunghoon, let alone a deep conversation?

Sunghoon doesn't know what to do with this information, he wants to march up to your coach and tell her wrong, but at the same time he really wants to comfort you. A hug?

No, too much. You aren't that close.

"I-if it makes you feel better," Sunghoon starts quietly, "you're the best skater I've ever seen, which is why I'm constantly bumping heads with you,"

This does all the work in making you giddy, because the Park Sunghoon, who you've known all your life, who you've envied, who's been by your side, thinks you're good at skating.

"Really?"

"Well, apart from Yuzuru Hanyu, Kim Yuna, Nath—"

Sunghoon is cut off by your soft punch at his side, and your laughter. Oh, your laughter. The indication that he succeeded in cheering you up, your smile brighting up his day.

"Thank you, Sunghoon,"

"No prob, bob," he replies with a smile. He nudges his head towards the rink, and his smirk widens, "now how about we prove your coach wrong?"

#enhypennetwork #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #enhypen drabbles #enhypen blurbs #enhypen fluff #enhypen angst #park sunghoon #park sunghoon imagines #park sunghoon x reader #park sunghoon fluff #park sunghoon scenarios #park sunghoon angst #park sunghoon drabbles #park sunghoon blurbs #i land

[lyssahlyssah]

Obey Me! The Present

a/n: not suitable for work

Well, this took a week of my life, but it's ok! It's obviously something I needed to get off my chest (ahem). I hope you enjoy. 🟣🔵⚫

pairing: F!MC x Belphegor, category: (very) not suitable for work, warnings: some angst, virgin sex, penetration, oral sex, teasing, man-eating petunias. description: Belphie give F!MC the present she's always wanted. wordcount: 2.1k

"Is there anything else I can do for you for your birthday? Being your present and all. "

In your room, Belphie stands in front of you with his usual coy smile. Tall and gorgeous, he cocks his head to one side causing hair to fall into his violet eyes. He confidently holds your gaze.  As the gaze lingers, his smile deepens, playfully suggestive.

Today is your birthday and you've spent it on a date with Belphie. Feeling guilty after forgetting to buy you anything, he had cleverly volunteered to be your present, granting you any wishes you wanted.

Excited by his creativity (and the prospect of time with him alone), you had taken full advantage, first visiting the planetarium and then the botanical gardens. You'd laughed together, played around, took naps under a tree with his head in your lap. At the botanical gardens, he'd even rescued you from man-eating petunias after you took a wrong turn, and had shamelessly teased you about it since. Everything was effortless and fun when you were together.

And now, looking at his smiling face, you reflected on how far the two of you'd come. This wasn't Belphie from long ago in the attic; the angry and vengeful demon that once tried to kill you, heart twisted with hate from the loss of his beloved sister. No, he had changed. As time had gone on, he had warmed to the whole world, even to his older brother Lucifer, whom he had once admitted hating to the point of murder. He was now letting people to get close to him again. And especially you. He had opened the door to his heart and was inviting you in.

Because of the complicated history you shared, a special bond grew between you. His aloofness drew your open and loving nature like a moth to a flame, and you clicked like magnets due to your differences. Over any of the other brothers, he made you feel comfortable. Facing him now, you realized you've fallen hard for the infamous sloth demon. It was for those reasons, a response to his question immediately floated to your lips.

"Kiss me", you say, giving him a smile of your own.

"Sure", he agrees, a blush on his cheeks. Your lips meet. It's soft and sweet. Somehow, even though you aren't sure where he found the time between naps to become this way, Belphie is an incredible kisser.

His lips push down on yours with a little more force, then abruptly pull back, leaving you breathless. "Is that all?" he asks. "In that case, I'll give myself to you every day" his eyes crinkle in a smile, ever teasing.

You wet your lips, heart pattering in your chest. You did want more from him...a lot more.  Now or never. you think. You catch his hand and hold it. "Ah...Belphie...actually, what I want instead, is to give m-myself....to you." you stammer a little in getting it out. His eyes widen as he realizes what you're insinuating. Silence.

"MC...you sure? With me?" Belphie stares back at you, no longer joking. He pauses. "Why me? Why not Lucifer...or...or...The Great Mammon?" he says, with a sarcastic flourish.

When he sees your face drop, he immediately apologizes and runs a hand through his thick hair, ruffling it. His voice softens. "I'm sorry...I've been angry for so long, you know? Sometimes it just comes out when I don't mean it to."

He takes your hand again and pulls you to the bed where you sit down together. Color rises in his cheeks. "Really though...I've lied to you, I've manipulated you. Not that long ago...I even tried to kill you. Why am I the one you want for this?" He searches your face for an answer. 

"You're my master, I can't refuse you, and I'd be crazy to anyway, but...why me?" Standing up, he paces a few feet in a circle, then sits down again. You've rarely seen him this worked up; it's obvious he still hasn't totally forgiven himself for hurting you.

"I love you Belphie", the words fall out of your mouth. Your eyes widen. You search your feelings and know it isn't a lie. His eyes are wide too. "Do...do you mean that?" he questions, leaning back.

You nod, "I need you, Belphie. I feel safe with you; I know you'd never hurt me now. And...I know you need me too". You continue, your voice low. "I want you. More than anyone else".

The words visibly shake him. He drops his head, staring into his lap, then slowly brings his head back up and gazes at you. You're taken aback by the open desire you see there. It's as if a mask has fallen off and you're seeing the real him for the first time.

When he speaks, it's slowly, deliberately.

"I want to know you that way, MC...More intimately than anyone ever has." His eyes start to glow a fierce purple. "You're mine, and I want to be your first. I want to give you something to remember me by when you go back to the human world." You swallow hard, your heart starting to race and nod.

He leans forward, takes your face between his hands, and kisses you. And again. Deeply, tongue reaching hungrily into your mouth. You whimper against his lips, full of want.

You give yourself over completely to his touch. His hands are on your face, guiding the movement of your heads. It feels so good, all the strength leaves you, and you fully let him hold you up. Between kisses, he makes small sounds of passion.

"You drive me crazy" he murmurs, looking into your eyes. A thrill runs up your spine. He's here, fully here - with you. No distance. Not a trace of sleepiness. In this moment of closeness, Belphie has completely overcome his sin.

You gasp as his fingers effortlessly snap off the button to your jeans with an audible pop. "Oops", he says, not sounding sorry in the slightest.

He leans you back onto the covers. Continuing to kiss you, he slides his hand into your jeans and caresses your lower stomach, playing with the hollow of your hip bone. Ticklish, you sharply draw in a breath, causing him to smile at you. "Don't be nervous" he says reassuringly. "I'll take care of you".

He sides your pants down, and then completely takes them off. You shiver, all at once feeling vulnerable.

"Mmmm..." He murmurs, looking over your body. "You're so beautiful. I've dreamed about getting to touch you like this". He reverently slides his hands up and down your thighs, your hips, your waist. Goosebumps raise up at his touch.

Holding your gaze, he leans down and pulls your shirt over your head then sits upright and does the same for himself. His hair is even more disheveled afterward and the thought of it being that way because you're in bed together turns you on.

Even though you've napped together endlessly, you've never seen this much of his body, and you sigh with pleasure drinking in the width of his shoulders, his flat stomach. He watches you just as avidly and the small smile returns as he sees the effect he has on you.

Leaning in, Belphie captures your lips once more in a steamy kiss. Running his hands up your shoulders, he cups your cheeks, then traces down your back and unhooks your bra. You respond by thrusting your own hands into his hair and pulling him to you.

He kisses his way down your chest and your stomach, where his lips leave little trails of fire on your skin. You try but can't remember ever feeling more aroused. He playfully nips your belly button as it goes by, and smiles when you jump and protest, eyes glinting.

Belphie stops between your legs, breathing out slowly, and kisses up one of your thighs. At the top he hugs it to his face, cheek pressing into the flesh. Pausing, he looks at you sideways and says, "I've wanted to do this since we met".

Taking his time, he hooks your panties with one finger and pulls them down. Admiring the view, he runs a finger down your core, lightly teasing your clit. You sigh, then jump when he gives a jerk. "You're so fucking wet down here" he utters in awed tones.

Seeing you so excited for him seems to unhinge him a little. Looking at your soaked slit with total attention, he raises his finger to his lips and lightly sucks off your excitement. His eyes flutter close and a low groan of desire escapes him. Leaning in, he buries his face in your folds. His soft tongue pushes roughly against your swollen clit and it's your turn to gasp.

He continues to work on you for a few minutes. The pleasure overwhelms you, but still, you want him deeper. Parts of yourself you aren't familiar with are showing up and demanding to be satisfied. You try to stretch your legs further and wider apart so his tongue can reach every needy part of you. More than happy to help, he greedily tongues your tight hole. "B-Belphie!" Your voice rises as you near your climax. He reaches one hand up and laces your fingers through his. "Go ahead, MC...I've got you, you're safe. I want to taste you when you cum." Soothed, you let yourself go fully, shuddering, waves of euphoria threatening to drown you. "Mmmm..." Belphie says contentedly. You can feel his lips as he captures every last drop on his tongue.

You collapse into the pillows as the pleasure ebbs away, but he doesn't give you time to rest. You feel manicured fingers slide into your slippery hole. At first, it's a gentle in-and-out getting you used to the sensation. You squirm, your flesh still sensitive from his earlier attentions. After a few moments, he picks up the pace and starts pushing into you faster and deeper, turning and curling the digits. Mewling with every thrust, you blush bright red, still a little self-conscious  From his place cradled between your legs, he watches your face possessively. "I love your sounds", he says.

Pleasure begins to fill your abdomen once again as you near climax, and you involuntarily start to grind against his hand, desperate to increase the tempo. Loving your impatience, he dips his head down and bites you on the inside of your thigh, near your core. Surprised by the unexpected sensation, you're pushed over the edge, launching into oblivion for the second time. This time he can't help himself and covers your mouth in a passionate kiss, jealously swallowing your cries of pleasure.

Thoroughly ravaged, you look up at him through half-lidded eyes. Belphie looks back at you, spellbound by the state you're in. "B...Belphie", you manage to get out. "What, MC?" he softly answers. "I need you inside me", you pleadingly say to his violet eyes. He shudders and pulls back from you.

"Okay", he says, unfastening his pants button. He pulls them down and his length springs out, large, strong, and perfect. Dazzled, your mouth drops open slightly. He smiles confidently at you and crawls back up your body. Once there, he turns your hips so you're lying on your back with your hips to one side, lined up to your exposed slit on his knees. He runs his hands over your ass, squeezing it, testing its softness, before bringing his hands back to grip your hip with both hands. "Tell me if I hurt you", he says with unexpected tenderness and starts to push inside you.

Due to the position of your hips and your overall tightness, his first thrust is shallow, but the friction makes you both groan. Pulling out slowly, drawing out the pleasure, he pushes inside again, going slightly deeper. Your eyes roll back in your head. He feels blissful, way past anything you had imagined.

Using your hip to pull your ass against his lap, he starts to move more quickly. With abandon, you throw your arms against the covers above your head, your face falling to one side and breasts jiggling as the snap of his thrusts push you up and down. Also lost in pleasure, his eyes are closed and low groans rumble from his throat.

It doesn't take long for you to climax again, and then again. Your walls clenching tightly around him, each climax earns you a growl, but Belphie shows no signs of giving you mercy. Finally, even though you wish it could last forever, he thrusts deeply within you and you feel his warmth spread into your abdomen.

Completely spent, you lay together in the candlelight, your head on his chest, legs intertwined. Your core aches sweetly. He holds you close. Happier than you've felt in your entire life, you both start to drop off. As you do, you raise your head to look at him, and you see he's already asleep. Full of affection, your chin on his chest, you breathe, "Thank you for granting my wish". Seconds later, fading into darkness you hear him whisper, "I love you, too".

#obey me swd #obey me reader insert #obey me smut #obey me! #obey me #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #belphie x mc #swd belphie #belphie #swd: obey me #obey me writing #obey me imagines

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

A fluorescent green gaze pierced through him from the rearview mirror. As much as the eye contact sent chills down Dale's spine, he didn't want to look away. Some primal part of his brain was much more comfortable keeping his eyes firmly planted on the predator in the back seat of the police car.

"Why won't he leave?" Dale whispered to his partner, the woman grit her teeth.

"I don't know, but I'm not the idiot who decided to fucking arrest him." spat Whitney.

"I didn't think it would work!" Dale hissed. They were trying to be quiet, but he was certain the ghost boy could hear them clear as day, especially with the quiet of the late night streets. "I was just following protocol. We're not supposed to ignore criminal activity."

"The protocol," Whitney's knuckles tightened on the steering wheel as she circled the block for the third time. "Is to not fuck with the ghosts Dale. Especially that one."

She jerked her head roughly to the boy in the back seat, he was looking around the car and humming to himself, he didn't appear to be paying attention, but that didn't mean he wasn't listening.

"Look I just... we need to at least keep up appearances. We can't just let people think we aren't even trying."

"Yes! Yes we can!" Whitney snapped her mouth shut as her volume started to rise with frustration, she glanced nervously into the mirror and took a deep breath before continuing in a low tone. "We aren't paid to deal with this kind of bullshit, we radio it in and let a Fenton or a Guy in White deal with it."

"Okay I get it!" Dale ran a hand through his thinning hair. "I just... I feel so pathetic doing nothing when ghosts are just running around destroying public property-"

"Oh yeah no that's fine Dale that's a great reason to go and put handcuffs on the most powerful ghost in the fucking city." Whitney took the next turn a little too sharply, Dale felt himself lurch sideways, but the boy in the back hardly moved. It wasn't especially surprising given his usual disregard for the laws of physics.

As well as all the other laws that Officer Dale was supposed to be enforcing.

"I told you I didn't think he would actually come willingly." Dale whispered harshly, his voice containing just the barest hint of hysteria. "I just wanted to show him that we aren't total pushovers, I didn't expect it to go this far."

They circled the block once more as Dale checked the rearview mirror again. Phantom was playing with his handcuffs, jiggling the chain and twisting his hands around them. It was almost like he was trying wriggle his way out of them, Dale knew perfectly well that they were just ordinary handcuffs, and he could phase through them at any moment. Phantom had to know that too.

Whitney flicked her eyes between the mirror and the road.

"Asshole," the word was barely audible, Dale would have missed it had he not seen her lips move. "He's just doing this to fuck with us."

"Of course he is." Dale rubbed at his face tiredly. "He's probably got nothing better to do, maybe he'll leave if another ghost shows up?"

"And exactly how long do you expect us to go around in circles waiting for that to happen?" Whitney asked through gritted teeth. "This is getting fucking embarrassing."

"Maybe we should just take him in," Dale sighed in defeat. Whitney took another corner way too hard, jostling him roughly in his seat.

"I am NOT taking Phantom back for processing. They will NEVER let us live this down, and I am NOT becoming the joke of the precinct because YOU decided to be a god damn moron and arrest a fucking ghost."

Another sharp turn and the entrance to the city park flew by their windows again, Dale had lost count how many times they'd circled the block, but somehow he was certain that Phantom hadn't.

The little shit was enjoying this, why couldn't he just sneak into a movie theatre to get his kicks like a normal teenager?

Whitney growled and pulled the car into a complete stop, the wheels screeched and Dale let out a loud WHUFF as the inertia jerked him hard against his seatbelt.

His partner violently wrenched the door open and pulled herself out of the car, slamming the door shut behind her with far more force than was necessary.

Dale followed suit and looked over the roof of the car as Whitney pulled open the back passenger door and whistled sharply, pointing up and out into the sky.

"Go on, get. Ride's over, you've had your fun."

"Awww come oooon," Phantom whined, "I didn't even get to hear you use the siren!"

"Don't care, we're the police, not baby sitters. Go find some ghost cops to bother."

"The ghost cops aren't as fun," Phantom moaned, but he did as he was told and stepped out of the car. "You know, you guys shouldn't swear so much around minors, you're corrupting the youth!"

"I'll corrupt my foot up your ass if you don't get going." said Whitney, flatly. She put her hand out and Phantom effortlessly dropped the cuffs from his wrists and tossed them at her.

He pulled a face at her as she fumbled with the handcuffs, sticking out a very green tongue.

"I saw that young man!" Dale pointed at him from the other side of the car. "Don't let us catch you disrespecting an officer of the law again! Next time you won't get off with just a warning-"

"Dale! For the love of all that is holy shut your damn fool mouth!"

Phantom hopped backwards from the irate woman, his last few steps landing on empty air. He floated gently upwards with a shit eating grin on his face.

"Well this has been fun but I gotta head off, but thanks for the company! We should do it again some time, see you around!" He waved a casual salute and swung around, legs stretching out into a long swirling tail as he sped off into the sky.

Dale felt his knees shaking as he slipped back into the car. Whitney settled into her seat, hands steady as a rock as she belted herself up and started the car.

"That was terrifying." He gasped.

"And yet you still had to keep playing bad cop."

"I'm sorry it just slipped out! He's no different to any of the other punks we deal with around here. A wiseass with no respect for authority." Dale huffed and folded his arms, crossly.

"...He probably wasn't any different, before he died." Whitney said, quietly.

Dale didn't respond, letting the statement sit heavily between them as the car pulled away from the curb.

"I forget that sometimes, you know." said Dale. "This is the first time I've ever seen him up close and he... he really does just look like some kid. How do you think he... how do you think it happened?"

Whitney let out a deep breath as they completed their final lap around the block and headed in toward the city centre.

"I have no idea, and I'm pretty sure that's the kinda thing you can't ask." she paused for a moment, before continuing with a quiet pain in her voice. "He's so young."

"I wonder if his parents know," Dale mused sombrely, "That he's, you know, still around?"

"Who knows."

A car cut them off suddenly at an intersection.

"That was a red light." Dale announced.

The police car's lights flashed as the siren echoed through the empty streets, and Whitney slammed her foot down to catch up with the offending vehicle.

The conversation was over, but neither cop forgot about the incident, and neither could look at their city's hero and menace quite the same. Dale had gotten quite good at seeing ghosts as merely 'creatures', or 'monsters', things that were entirely Strange and Other. Being up close and personal with one had been a much needed reminder of what a ghost truly was.

And that ghost, the one messing around in the back of his car, was a boy. Just a boy. A boy who had a family, a boy who had a life, a boy who had died.

When Dale got home in the early hours of the morning, he hovered by his kids' bedroom, carefully easing the door open to look at their little sleeping faces. Just to make sure they were still there, right where he left them. Still breathing, still alive.

He knew there was a family out there somewhere, parents who had looked through their son's bedroom door and seen only cold, empty sheets.

Dale stepped very carefully over the spilt lego pieces on the floor, and gave his girls both a long, heartfelt kiss on their little heads, before going back to his own room to lay by his sleeping wife's side.

No, no he truly couldn't look at Phantom quite the same way, not anymore.

#danny phantom #lula's fanfics #danny phantom fanfiction

[staticscreenwriting]

Love like the movies // Bucky Barnes // 6

SIX - GHOST

Trigger warning: Alcohol, food, mention of sex (nothing graphic and no actual smut)

Masterlist

Summary: This is a story of boy meets girl. The boy, Bucky Barnes, finds himself thrown into a world that seems so different from everything he’s ever known. The girl, (Y/N) knows entirely too much about rom-coms and is quite particular about the way she eats her popcorn. Bucky meets (Y/N) a few months after returning to NYC. He knows almost immediately that becoming her friend is inevitable. This is a story of boy meets girl. This is a story about love. (Bucky Barnes x female!Reader // a few spoilers for TFATWS)

"You held hands?"

"Mmh."

"And then you cuddled."

"We didn't cuddle, I was just kind of - leaning into him. Sort of."

"So you cuddled!"

"Sure. If that's what you wanna call it. We cuddled."

"Then what?" Robin inquires. Smirking at (Y/N) over the rim of her wine glass, like a giddy pre-teen waiting for the kissing scene to come up in a romance movie.

"And nothing. That's it."

"Oh come oooon. You cozied up to each other and then just what - acted like it never happened?"

"Essentially. But that's okay. It's not a big deal. And don't say it like that."

"Like what?" Robin continues to poke and by this point, it's not so much her wanting information than her trying to rile up (Y/N). Though she's very well aware of this, (Y/N) falls for it anyway.

"Cozied up to each other," (Y/N) says and scrunches her nose up in distaste. "Like we had dirty sex or something."

"Do you want to have dirty sex with him? Oh man, imagine what that arm can do."

Holding her hand out to stop her best friend from talking, (Y/N) takes a big gulp of white wine, emptying her glass. This is a conversation that can't be held entirely sober. "First of all, don't say those things about his arm. It's- I don't know. It doesn't sit right with me."

"Sorry yeah that was … not cool" Robin apologizes and by the tone of her voice (Y/N) can tell she means it.

"I'm the first to admit that Bucky is insanely handsome and if things were different, sure. But we're friends and I really enjoy the time spent together and our friendship. I don't wanna do anything to jeopardize it or ruin it by adding unnecessary feelings to it."

"Feelings aren't unnecessary," Robin replies, combing her fingers through her fiery red curls.

"Sometimes they are. The last thing Bucky and I need is broken hearts and ruined friendships."

"What if it doesn't end that way?"

"Relationships never work out well for me, you know that."

Robin places her glass on the countertop. It means whatever talk is gonna follow, it'll be a serious one. There's been very little need for a serious talk between the girls over the time they've been friends but neither of them has ever been afraid to start those conversations and say things as they are. Sometimes that's what friendship is, being blunt even if it's not what your friend wants to hear.

"Look I'm not saying you have to take the relationship to another level. If this is making you happy the way it is, then that's all that matters to me. I just don't want you to give up on something that could be great, because you're scared and because some stupid assholes in the past didn't realize what they had in you."

Where she's only had shit luck with relationships, (Y/N) thinks she's really lucked out in the friend department. Robin is as wonderful as they come. Even if she drives her crazy sometimes.

"They weren't all assholes." (Y/N) chimes up weakly though there's not even enough determination in her voice to convince herself.

"Weren't they? Let's see ...I'm not even gonna talk about Russel. He doesn't count. Who else was there? Pete liked to show you off but he didn't like you. Did he?"

"Not really."

"See? Asshole! Kylie only wanted to be with you so she could be the cool girl who's fucked another girl once and use that as something to brag to the guys about."

"She was figuring herself out."

"She was straight, babe. She was using you and your sexuality as some kind of badge of honor so guys would think she's cool. She only wanted to make out with you at parties and when there were men around to ogle you. I’m the last person to blame anyone for trying to figure out who they are and who they like but that wasn’t the case here. She used you, and what does that make her?"

“ An asshole? “

“ An asshole!”

“ What about Ricky, he wasn’t an asshole! “ (Y/N) chimes in, filling her glass up once more.

“ Okay sure but he was your High School sweetheart and that rarely lasts. I’m not gonna count him. What about Mike —“

“— Okay, you’ve made your point. I have a bad taste in romantic partners, I get it. Doesn’t change anything. Me and Bucky we’re — we’re good as we are. No romance needed.”

“ Just don’t want you to miss out on something great.”

It’s not that the thought has never crossed her mind. In fact, when she’s being really honest to herself, it swirls around her head a lot. When he grants her one of his smiles. The rare ones that make his eyes crinkle. Or when he comes to see her and brings dog treats for Lady, just because he’s that thoughtful. Or when she noticed he put a popcorn and a sun emoji next to her name in his phone. The popcorn, as he said because she liked movies and the sun because she’s always happy and smiling. Or when he held her hand throughout the entire movie. Those are moments when (Y/N) thinks about what it would be like to be more than friends.

“ It’s great as it is now. He’s great.”

“ Then that’s all that matters to me.” Robin smiles. She has one of those smiles that makes you feel at home. Comfortable and soft. Like warm milk with honey a mom makes their child when they can’t sleep.

It’s a while later, when (Y/N) strolls back into the room, another bottle of wine in hand, that a knock sounds on her front door. Her eyes wander to Robin then to the door then back. “I’m not expecting anyone.”

“ Oh, that’s Bucky.” Robin, who’s by now migrated over to (Y/N)’s huge fluffy couch, Lady cuddled onto her lap, says with the most casual of tones (Y/N) has ever heard. As if Bucky and her have been lifelong friends. As if there is nothing strange or peculiar about this situation.

“ How do you know?”

Robin shrugs and goes back to petting Lady’s curly fur. “ He texted you when you were getting the wine. Said he was around and had food. I told him to come join us for movie night. What’s the big deal? “

“ I uh — it’s not I just — you could’ve told me. “

“ That was literally 5 minutes ago babe. I had no time to tell you yet. By the way, this man uses entirely too many emojis.”

A smile pulls on the corners of (Y/N)’s lips. She’s asked him once why he never used any emojis, or smileys as he called them (all of them — even the ones that aren’t faces). He told her he didn’t really understand when to use most of them, like the shrimp or the Hockey stick. (Y/N) told him it’s because they’re fun. Ever since then he uses all kinds of emojis with her. None really relating to his messages. It’s quite endearing if she’s being honest.

“ Are you gonna let him in? “ Robin asks, shaking (Y/N) out of her thoughts.

The smell of Chinese food floods into the apartment as (Y/N) opens her door to Bucky. He looks so effortlessly cool in his leather jacket and boots. With his hair a little longer now, all swoopy and quiffed. Like the bad boy straight from a romance novel. The one with a heart of gold. The one that gets the girl.

(Y/N) is not that girl, the one from the novels, the Hallmark movies. The one that’s quirky but never weird. The one that makes all the boys fall for her. She’s not the main character, at least according to herself. She’s the side character that shows up like twice. The one that helps the main character on their quest to self-discovery or true love. That’s who she is. Not more, not less.

“ I brought food!” Bucky exclaims as he steps inside, waving the bag around before placing it on the kitchen counter, to which Lady jumps up from her position on Robin’s lap.

Lady, (Y/N) has realized a while ago, has somehow fallen head over paws in love with Bucky. Always following him, looking up at him with her big brown puppy eyes. Always looking to be close to him. Maybe, (Y/N) thinks, it’s the treats he always carries around. But maybe it’s Bucky too and his patience and his affection and the way he greets the little dog like she’s the main reason he’s come around.

Moments like this, they come with those little flutters around the heart. People always compare them to butterflies. (Y/N) thinks that’s wrong. Butterflies are gentle, graceful, and soft. This feels like a swarm of bees. Chaotic. Overwhelming. A little bit scary.

“ Man, did you plan on coming here, or did you buy all this for yourself?” Robin asks, eyes wide in surprise at the sheer amount of styrofoam containers Bucky keeps pulling from the bags.

“ I kind of bought it with the intention of sharing, yeah. “

Robin’s eyes meet (Y/N)’s across the room and there's a silent secret there, hidden in her teasing smirk. One shared only with a friend. No words. No sounds. Just the truth and two knowing hearts connecting.

“ Am I intruding? If you guys want me to leave, I can leave. “

While he tries to keep his voice casual, the sad tint doesn’t get lost on (Y/N).

“ Absolutely not, don’t be silly. We’re just drinking wine and watching a movie and you are free to join us in both.”

While he shakes his head at her offer of wine, Bucky helps (Y/N) bring the food over to the couch and plops down in the middle of the couch, Robin to his right and (Y/N) on his left.

“ What are we watching? “ he asks, a dumpling already on the way into his mouth.

“ Well, “ Robin responds filling her glass up once more, “ it was (Y/N)’s turn to chose so —”

“ A rom-com”

“ A rom-com. “

Something about seeing these two interact and joke around inspires a fuzzy feeling to wrap itself around (Y/N)’s heart. Even if they’re making fun of her.

The way Bucky fits in here, as if it’s where he’s always belonged. The way he’s not a stranger imposing but a friend added to the mix. It’s a nice feeling. She hopes he feels it too.

“ Okay, whatever. This isn’t your usual rom-com though, there are ghosts in this one. “

“ Is it ghosts falling in love?” Robin asks and lets her laugh get swallowed by her wine glass.

“ No. Well — uh kinda but not really. They fall in love be — you know what, just start the damn movie! “

There’s an undeniable intimacy in watching your favorite movies with other people. It’s like giving away little pieces of yourself and sharing them with others. No matter how insignificant it may seem to anyone else but you. These are the things that make us who we are. Our passions. For art. For music. For books. For movies. And opening up is always scary. Even if it’s just a teeny tiny bit.

Through the corner of her eye (Y/N) glances at Bucky and Robin, trying to judge their reactions. See if they’re enjoying themselves or not. Bucky displays his ever-present scowl. It’s the default setting. Sometimes she wonders if that has always been the case. If that's just what he looks like or if years of abuse, horror, pain have left their marks on him, on not only his heart but also his face.

Maybe this can be his safe place, she thinks. Maybe she can be. Not someone to fix him, because he’s not broken, just lost. Not to fix but to hold his hand while he heals. Slowly but surely.

For a while, the three sit in comfortable silence. The kind that fills you with this inexplicable calm. Where no words are needed.

And then the beginning chords of unchained melody spill from the tv speakers. It’s a touch there, a kiss here, hands covered in clay. Bodies covered in clay. Gasps and heavy breathing. Hands grasping skin, wandering, loving.

Robin’s presence falls completely to the back of (Y/N)’s mind. Bucky’s however...

“Do you want to have dirty sex with him? “ her friend's words ghost through her head like a particularly annoying jingle for some tv ad. The room feels warm all of a sudden. Not warm — boiling. There’s a heat radiating from her right, from Bucky. So what if he’s attractive. So what if she sometimes lets her mind wander and think about how his hands would feel on her skin or his lips on hers or his — yeah okay you get the point. So what?

Bucky slumps down into the couch a little more with every second of steamy pottery sex that’s fluttering across the tv screen. Is he — nervous? Uncomfortable ? No, she must be imagining it. Projecting, that’s what this is. She’s projecting her own chaotic emotional state onto him. There’s nothing there. (Y/N) has to remind herself. Just secret little thoughts that have to be kept between her and her. As long as no one knows, no one gets hurt. It’s the easy way out. The safe way. The right way.

Right?

“ Sooo, what did you guys think?” (Y/N) asks, turning her body towards her friends and sitting criss-cross on the couch.

“ Didn’t expect all the murder. “ Bucky replies as he takes a sip from his beer. “ And the — “

“ The messy sex! I know.” a visibly intoxicated Robin cuts in.

“ Not where I was going but okay.”

She doesn’t pay his words any attention, instead of launching herself backwards over the arm of the couch, dramatically fanning herself with her perfectly manicured hand. “ I am not going to lie, oh boy that was some hot stuff. Wouldn’t say no to that.”

“Oh please,” (Y/N) chimes in, wine glass clutched in hand and smile on her face. She can clearly feel the alcohol washing through her system bringing her to the place between sober and drunk where everything feels light and your confidence seems to get a little extra boost. “ What do you have to complain about? You’re getting married in two weeks! I’m sure you get enough action as it is. “

Robin doesn’t answer right away, just throws (Y/N) a giddy, boozed-up smile. Though in her eyes, there’s a loved-up glimmer of someone about to marry the love of their life.

“ Yeah, that’s true.”

“See, so you’re not the one that should be complaining. Us, however…”

Her red curls swing around her like a spark of fire as Robin sits up again, pointing her finger at (Y/N).

“ And whose fault is that? You could be getting some if you didn’t get so lost in your romantic fantasies. And him — “ the red-haired girl exclaims before pointing her finger towards Bucky “ don’t even tell me he ain’t getting some. Look at him! Are you sexually active, Bucky? “

“ You don’t have to answer that. Robin, come on.”

“ No, you don’t have to but you should. I’m trying to prove a point. Help me prove a point, Bucky. “

“ You’re making him uncomfortable. “

“ Am I making him uncomfortable or you? “

“ Ooookay, I think it’s time for you to go to bed. “

“ Nooo, we’re having a conversation. “

“ Would you look at that, my drink is empty. I’m just gonna — I’m gonna get another one. Okay? Okay.”

Bucky doesn’t wait for an answer before getting up and rushing out of the living room and into the kitchen, clearly uncomfortable. Clearly embarrassed.

“ See what you did? You scared him off. “

“ I couldn’t scare that man off if I tried. Trust me. “ Robin murmurs, a loud yawn cutting through her argument. There’s a certain determination in her words though. Some truth hidden in there that (Y/N) can’t quite put her finger on. It’s like Robin knows something she doesn’t. And maybe it’s good this way. Maybe she doesn’t need to know.

“ Alright, whatever that’s supposed to mean, Tipsy. I’ll go see what he’s up to. You go the fuck to sleep.”

“ Whatever mom, “ Robin bickers and cuddles closer into the soft couch anyway. “ Oh, don’t forget to invite him! I like him. We’re friends now. “

“ Go to sleep! “ (Y/N) orders again, earning herself a salute from her best friend who starts snoring no more than 2 seconds later.

He feels like a 13-year-old. Actually — no. Things were easier at 13. Situations like this one were easier at 13. Being horny was easier at 13.

It was all new to him then, yes, but it was new for everyone at 13. He’s 106 now, a grown man. He should be able to talk or at least think about these things without turning into a full-blown mess. His hand is clammy, his face is probably the same shade of bright red as Robin’s hair. And by god, his thoughts are a jumbled mess, swirling around all over the place.

Truth be told, he hasn’t had a lot of time to actually think about anything even remotely physical. It was never very high on his list of things to figure out and the opportunity hasn’t really presented itself to him either. Not since the 1940s at least.

Have things changed? Surely not, right? Maybe people got a bit more experimental and for sure they talk more openly about it now but the fundamentals must have stayed the same. He sure hopes so at least.

His thoughts get interrupted as (Y/N) steps into the kitchen. Her eyes are slightly glassed over from the wine though she’s nowhere near as drunk as Robin. She seems happy, then again she always does. For a little moment, he feels jealousy wash over him. About being able to get drunk. It’s damn stupid, he’s well aware. But that doesn’t make his feelings less valid. To just drink and let go and forget, that sounds really nice.

But that’s just one of the things the serum has taken from him. By far not the worst aspect of it all but unpleasant either way.

“ Hey uh — you okay? “ she asks leaning against the kitchen island across from him.

“ Sure. Are you? “

“ I uh — might be a little drunk, “ (Y/N) confesses as she lifts her hand and indicates a tiny space with her fingers.

“ Yeah, I think you might be.” Bucky laughs. Actually laughing comes naturally when she’s around and quite honestly, at first, it made him feel guilty. Guilty about the fact that he got to laugh along with a pretty girl while so many people had to die through his hands.

He tries to push those thoughts away. They aren’t doing anyone any good. Not him and not those people either.

“ Hey, I’m sorry she was making you uncomfortable. She gets — well she has no filter when drunk. Or ever really.”

Bucky shakes his head. His finger nervously trails along the grain of the stone countertop. There are conversations he needs to have, sooner or later, if he wants to live his life. Not just coast along but actually live. But it doesn’t mean those come easy. Not for someone who’s been through all he’s been through. Not for someone who’s grown up the way he has, who’s been raised the way he has.

“ Ah, no. Don’t worry. I uh — I just. It’s been a long time since I had talks like this. “

“ Like what? “

“ Between friends, you know. About — stuff. “

“ About sex? “

“ Mmh. “

“ You don’t have to talk about it with us if you don’t want to. It’s fine. “

“ No, but I do want to talk about sex with you. I mean — not you, you. You both. But not in a weird way. I mean — with friends. “

“ Okay. “

“ It’s just that I was raised in different times and the last time I had a real actual friend that I talked to about intimate things was so long ago. Steve and I talked about everything and even then there used to be reservations. One because I don’t think Steve really wanted details and two because Steve wasn’t — he didn’t have the most experience when it came to women so it was a very one-sided conversation. And I’ve never talked about any of this with a girl. It’s all new to me but I don’t want you to think I don’t trust you. “

(Y/N) regards him with a glimmer of amusement and mischief in her eyes as she munches away on some cold leftover spring rolls.

“ You don’t have to justify yourself to me, Buck. I know you trust me, I hope you know I trust you. “

He does. And he doesn’t hate how it sounds when she calls him Buck.

“ So, Robin and Charlie are getting married in two weeks. I was wondering if you’d like to be my plus one. Back when they announced it I was under the impression Russel and I would be a thing by then but uh — clearly that didn’t happen. It’s in upstate New York. We’re all gonna stay at this gorgeous Inn and well there’s a spot open if you want it.”

“ As a plus one? “

No matter how much he wants to deny it to himself, his heart does a little flutter as she says those words. A plus one sounds like something. He’s not sure what but something, surely.

“ Yeah, as a friend, obviously. “

“ Obviously. “

There goes the flutter.

“ Robin is okay with it by the way. She explicitly told me to ask you.”

“ So Robin wants me there, not you. “

“ No! I want you there! I love spending time with you. Also, Robin’s family is crazy. I need you by my side. I need you there. I want you there. “

“The need to be needed is an individual’s sense of significance rooted in the sense of being part of a community or cause beyond themselves. The need to be needed is one of our fundamental desires. We want to feel significant in the eyes of others, even if it is only one other person. “

Bucky has read those words in one of the many magazines stacked on the little side table in the waiting room of Dr. Raynor's office. They didn’t really make much sense to him then. He always thought he’d be fine by himself.

In that moment he realizes that was all a big pile of absolute bullshit.

The feeling of being wanted, of being needed, even if it’s just one person that needs him, that means everything.

“ Okay, I’ll come. “

“ Yeah? “

And there it is again, the smile that reminds him of the sun. The smile that he’s sure could bring a thousand men to their knees, including himself.

“ Cool. I’m — I’m really happy about that. “

“ Mmh. Me too. “

For a moment they just look at each other, words unspoken swirling in the air between them, neither brave enough to let them slip from their tongue.

It’s not until a particularly loud snore coming from the living room pops the bubble and breaks the spell.

Both of them fall into giggles before Bucky speaks up again.

“ It's late I should probably go. “

“ Yeah and I should go to bed. I’ll have a hangover tomorrow for sure.”

Bucky slips into his leather jacket and places a soft kiss goodbye on Lady’s head before turning back to (Y/N).

“ For the record, I’m not getting any. “

“ I uh — okay. Good. Well not good, “ (Y/N) stumbles over her words “ not good for you. Good for me. I mean. Not that I don’t want you to have sex. But I mean, Robin was taking the piss, and if I don’t get laid it makes me feel better to know you aren’t either. Oh god, this sounds horrible. I’m just gonna stop talking now. “

Bucky smiles the brightest smile she’s ever seen him smile, it almost breaks his face in two. And even though she wants the ground to swallow her whole right then, if it puts a smile like that on his face, she’ll gratefully embarrass herself again.

“ Have a good night, (Y/N). “

“ You too, Bucky”

And with a kiss to her head, he leaves the flat, a smile staying on his lips the entire way home.

“ Why did I have to come again? This is a bachelorette party, I thought men aren’t allowed. “ Bucky grumbles as (Y/N) parks her truck in the parking lot of the convenience store. The pink and blue neon lights reflect on the wet asphalt.

“ It’s a shared party. We’re all friends so it makes sense for the couple to celebrate together. Stop moaning. “ (Y/N) exclaims as her heels create a click-clack sound.

The store is empty as they enter except for the bored-looking teenager leaning against the counter by the cash register.

There’s something about empty stores at night that makes it feel like time stands still. Like for a moment, reality is altered. There’s only you and the outdated music coming from the speakers and the hum of the refrigerators holding the soda cans.

“ I can’t believe Hannah forgot to bake the cake. It’s all she had to do. I did everything else, everything. She had one job. “

Bucky’s learned by now to just let her rant about this topic. It’s all she’s talked about for the last hours since Hannah, public enemy number one that day, has called her to inform her she’s forgotten about the cake. Why there needs to be a cake at this party, Bucky doesn’t know but hey, who is he to question it.

(Y/N) walks straight over to the counter that holds the bakery items only to be met with disappointment.

“ Well great. We can choose between one single cupcake, a box of stale donuts, and a croissant. “

“ What about this one? “ Bucky asks and points towards a bright pink cake decorated with candy roses and white icing.

“ It says Happy Birthday. “

“ Ah, don’t worry we can fix that.”

(Y/N) raises her eyebrows in doubt. “ You sure? “

“ 100%. Trust me. “

She regards him for a moment, uncertainty shining through, before granting him a little smile and a nod. “ Okay then. You get the cake, I’ll be over there for a second. “

Looking through the fridges, (Y/N)’s eyes fall onto a pack of popsicles in the shape of Captain America’s shield.

Ripping open the fridge door she calls out “ Hey Grumpy, would you like thes— “

All she hears is a smack and then Bucky’s voice exclaiming a loud “Fuck!”

And in that moment she doesn’t know what’s more shocking, the fact that she just slammed the door right into his face or hearing him swear.

“ Are you okay? I’m so sorry. “

“ I’ll be fine.”

“ We gotta put ice on it. “

“ No (Y/N) I — “

She’s already on her way to get a pack of frozen peas. And if Bucky is being real honest, his cheek does hurt quite a bit. Super Soldier Serum and all …

“ I am genuinely so sorry. “

Bucky sits on the bed of (Y/N)’s truck, frozen peas pressed to his face and a chuckle falling from his lips as (Y/N) sends yet another apology his way.

“ It’s okay, (Y/N). I told you, I’m fine. “

He pulls the peas away from his face and places them next to him, before picking up the cake and lifting the plastic lid off of the container.

“ Alright, let’s see if I can fix this. “

“ You have a bruise on your cheek. “

Bucky looks up at her with those gorgeous blue eyes of his, that (Y/N) sometimes finds herself drowning in. Calm and story all at once. Like oceans.

“ Does it make me look rough and handsome? “

“ You’re always handsome. But yes, it gives you a roguish charm. “

“ Good. “

(Y/N) feels a heat rush to her face as Bucky focuses back on the cake.

“ Mmmkay. Let me see. What if we — “ Bucky murmurs, more to himself than to (Y/N). He swipes his finger, sans glove, over the white icing letters and while there’s a good intention there, when he lifts his finger back up the cake looks like a downright mess.

“ Ta-da “ he exclaims and turns the cake towards her.

“ It says Happy day now “

“ Is it not a happy day? “ Bucky asks, eyebrows raised in question.

“ Let me rephrase that. It says ‘Happy messy white stain Day’ “

Bucky pulls his lips into a grimace, eyes wandering from (Y/N) down to the cake and back to her. “ Yeah, we can’t bring that “.

Laughter fills the air as they regard the sad mess of a cake before them. If this was a movie, (Y/N) thinks, this would be their moment. The one where they realize. The one that feels like time stops and all that matters is them.

Something wet and sticky against her cheek pulls her from her daydream.

“ What the hell? “

Bucky only grins at her. There’s the boyish charm again. It’s so insanely endearing to see these little moments flare up and push through the perpetual gloom he seems to carry with him. He doesn't hold the weight of 90 years of fighting on his shoulders right then.

“ Oh you didn’t “

Before Bucky can react she grabs a handful of the cake and smashes it against the uninjured side of his face.

“ Is that how you wanna play it? Okay. Fine. “

Cake flies through the air as their laughter rings through the night. Not a thought wasted on pain, on worries, on heartbreak.

The rooftop bar (Y/N) booked specifically for this night is covered in fairy lights and glitter decor. There’s a karaoke machine in one corner and an open bar in the other.

A loud cheer sounds from the crowd as Robin steps out into the open, fingers intertwined with those of a petite brunette with big square glasses sitting on her nose.

They get swallowed by a tidal wave of people, pulled from one hug into another, and while his eyes stay with them, Bucky feels a touch against his metal arm. (Y/N) wraps herself around him leans her head against his shoulder and stares lovingly at the couple before them.

“ I’m so glad she’s happy. I love her so much. “

“ She loves you too. “ he says.

And really how could anyone not?

A little while later, when the crowd has allowed them to breathe again, Robin and the brunette wander towards Bucky and (Y/N), matching smiles on their faces.

“ Buck, this is Charlie, Robin’s fiancee. Charlie, this is my friend Bucky. “

“ It’s so nice to meet you,” Charlie exclaims, a strong English accent dripping from her words. “ What in the world happened to your face? Are you okay? “

While Bucky smirks, (Y/N) flinches at those words and shrinks into herself a little.

“ Oh you know, funny story. Someone here was a little too excited about some red white and blue popsicles. “

Robin lets out a loud laugh “ Now that sounds like someone I know very well. “

“ They were shaped like Cap’s shield, okay. I thought it was funny and fitting. “

Charlie’s eyes move between the 3, a look of confusion settling on her features.

“ Why fitting? “

“ Oh babe, let me catch you up,” Robin says and steers Charlie in the direction of the bar.

The night flies by and for the first time in so long, Bucky doesn’t feel out of place. Not for a single moment. Even being surrounded by people he doesn’t know and while listening to music he doesn’t get. It’s nice, feeling like you belong.

Robin and Charlie have just finished their karaoke rendition of Don’t Stop Believing when a familiar voice echoes from the speakers.

“ Hello guys, my name is (Y/N). You may know me, I’m the maid of honor. I am responsible for this party — you’re welcome. Anyway, I guess it’s my turn to sing tonight but I can’t do this one alone. I’m gonna require my friend, Mr. James Buchanan Barnes up on this very stage with me. “

Oh no. Definitely no. Not in a million years. No w—

“ Because this one’s a duett. “

Her eyes meet his across the way, shining with amusement, mischief, affection. Even across the dimly lit roof, her sunshine smile seems to light up the entire night.

“ I’m not doing it, “ Bucky says and shakes his head as Robin slides up to his side.

“ C’moooon. “

“ Nope. I probably don’t even know the song. “

It’s like the universe wants to make a fool of him as in just that moment Bill Medley’s voice sounds through the night.

“ I know you know this song. “ Robin says and nudges his side “ come on don’t make her do this by herself. “

“ I — “ he looks at (Y/N) again, with her sunshine smile and those expressive eyes and the buttercream stain on her shirt. And he doesn’t see fear or pain or regret. All he ever sees when he looks at her is happiness and fun and laughter.

“ Ugh. Okay. Alright. “

Cheers follow him as he steps on stage and (Y/N) hands him the second mic. Though it’s supposed to be a duett, (Y/N) doesn’t really care and sings both parts with unfiltered joy and unapologetic passion. And while it takes a moment for him to warm up to it, Bucky can’t help but let her enthusiasm light a spark in him too and by the time the pre-chorus hits he joins her in singing their hearts out.

“ You're the one thing I can't get enough of. So I'll tell you something. This could be looooooove “

New York comes alive with the promise of a better tomorrow. One where Bucky feels like he belongs. To a place or a group of friends or a person. A tomorrow where he can laugh with a pretty girl, have food fights in a parking lot, and sing some silly song at the top of his lungs.

Maybe the song isn’t all wrong. Maybe he’s having the time of his life. And maybe, just maybe, he owes it to (Y/N).

Taglist // if you want to be added or taken off just message me :) //:

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#bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky imagine #bucky x y/n #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #winter solider fanfiction #winter soldier x female reader #bucky barnes x f!reader #marvel imagine #tfatws imagine #james barnes x reader

[suganovakawa]

𝐒𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐀𝐃𝐄 .

PAIRINGS : tooru oikawa x fem! reader , slight hajime iwaizumi x fem! reader

GENRE : angst , romance

WARNINGS : cursing , car accident , recovery from amnesia

SYNOPSIS : tooru doesn’t understand how special you are to him until he comes close to losing you forever . as he struggles to comes to grips with his feelings and balance it with his future , you still have to recover from your own injuries , but without your memories to assist you .

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐗 < [ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐈𝐗 ] > 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐗𝐈𝐈

if he really wanted to, tooru could tell you everything right here and now.

word count : 2k

saudade masterlist .

SAUDADE

( 𝐧 . ) a nostalgic longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant , or that has been loved and then lost ; “ the love that remains ”

⠀his knee wasn't the reason why he started crying on the gym floor. screw his knee for all he cared, tooru had dealt with his injury time and time again, a shot of pain through his bad knee hardly fazed him nowadays. nothing he couldn't just walk off.

⠀any resolve he had, his emotions couldn't be contained the moment you entered the gym. the pain he felt was unlike anything he had experienced before, clenching his jaw in futile attempts to suppress his gushing tears, his vision obscured and his ears focused solely on your soothing voice. he was too ashamed to talk amidst his breakdown, letting you do all the work and talking as he sat there, helpless. he didn't have it in him to dare explain himself.

⠀nothing hurt more to oikawa than watching you take care of him. even after your car accident, your amnesia, everything you've been through since then; you were still stubborn enough to take care of him first. the third year wiped his face, trying to collect himself as he watched you panic over his knee. his breath caught in his throat as he watched you gently place your hand where the brace was, as if afraid to injure him even more.

⠀"i'm fine," he whispered hoarsely, his voice drowned out by the remains of his early breakdown. "you can go, i'll be okay. you don't need to be here."

⠀even now, he was pushing you away - but your stubbornness remained. "but your knee," you urged, shaking your head as his words only seemed to pull you closer to him. tooru had never felt so claustrophobic in an open gym in his life. "please, you hurt yourself and it's my fault. the least i can do is get you something."

⠀you hardly even knew him. you had no recollection of him, withheld absolutely no memories - and yet you were as adamant as ever in wanting to care for his well being. he clenched his jaw at your words; he was beyond undeserving of your kindness from the start, yet you always kept finding your way back to him. he was nothing but a bad luck charm to you, but every single damn time you came back. tooru didn't know if you were stupid, or the universe just wanted to mock him for how he treated you before.

⠀he had only started getting back to practice for two days, only for his motivation to run down the drain the moment you waltzed into the seijoh gym by chance. even now, everything was coming back to him - he felt sick to the stomach. you were still fussing over his knee, almost cradling him as you looked around for anything that would get him off the ground. he was so distracted in his own thoughts that he never realized the pain in his knee never subsided.

⠀"there's a chair over there." giving into your relentless persuasion, he pointed to a folded chair not too far from the doors. "if you really want to help, getting me off this floor would be a good place to start."

⠀"got it!" no sooner had he finished his sentence, you were already off your feet, sprinting to retrieve the chair without a second thought. he watched you take the foldable chair and drag it back to him under your arm, focused completely on returning back to him as quickly as possible.

⠀something didn't feel right. his knee hurt much more than usual. while he became accustomed and numb to it, pain is pain. he tried to reach out and help you unfold the chair but you swatted his hand away, shaking your head as you flattened the seat for him to sit on. his breathing was ragged, fresh from his tears.

⠀your hand extended for him as support. after a moment's hesitation, he reached out and placed his hand in yours, the contact foreign as you managed to stand your ground for him. he pulled himself off the ground, clenching his jaw as he plopped all of his weight onto the chair the moment he hovered over the seat. he kept his right leg stretched out, to not bend or put any stress on his knee.

⠀before anything else could be said, you left him again, only to return with another chair for his leg. tooru watched silently as you took a deep breath, gently taking hold of his leg and lifting it onto the chair to elevate his injured knee. the male felt his heart race; how did you know to do this? the way you took control of the situation so effortlessly, it put him at a loss of words. anytime this happens, he usually has to tell people step-by-step to get his knee properly taken of.

⠀but you. you were always the exception, even now. what could the captain possibly say to you now? he watched warily as you simply sat down on the ground right next to him, looking comfortable where you were. the silent that soon passed between the two of you was deafening; you were right here. literally sitting here, you came to him. he didn't have to search for you. everything he wanted to say, everything he wanted to explain was overwhelming his tongue. but nothing came out; oikawa was a coward.

⠀"do you need me to do anything for you?" he was alarmed that you spoke up first, your face confused as your eyes met his. "should i call someone? do you want me to grab your bag? do you need help outside?"

⠀"no." out of force of habit he quickly snapped back, only for him to clear his throat with a cough and shook his head quickly. "no, but thank you. usually the pain subsides in a little bit. i'll be able to call for a ride home once the pain becomes manageable."

⠀"are you sure? i can call hajime, i'm sure he wouldn't mind - "

⠀"please, do not contact iwaizumi." hearing his name out of your mouth nauseated him to the stomach. "why isn't he with you anyway? aren't you two always together?"

⠀you seemed embarrassed at the fact that he knew as well. tooru hid a scoff; only an idiot wouldn't be able to see how he followed you like a lovesick puppy. "yeah, i get that a lot." he was taken aback by your tone - you sounded annoyed. "actually i... i asked him to leave me alone today. he's left me alone since lunch. i thought it'd be harder to get him off of me, but he never argued."

⠀did something happen between the two of you? the brunet third year couldn't decide whether he should be concerned or relieved; his face remained neutral, but this was certainly news to him. "why did you ask him to stay away from you? don't you... enjoy his company?" he spat words out like venom in his system, pausing for a second before sighing quietly. "i'm sorry, i don't mean to pry. you don't have to answer."

⠀"no, it's alright." you laughed - a sound tooru hadn't experienced in much too long. goosebumps travelled through every inch of his body as you shook your head. "truth be told, i just wanted to be alone for the day. i also..." your voice drifted off, looking down at your lap as you spoke up again as a whisper. "i've been wanting answers to my empty memories."

⠀and just like that, an invisible force punched tooru deep in the gut, his hands visibly going to his abdomen and wrapping his arms around himself hastily. "your memories, huh?' was all he bring himself to respond with.

⠀"i'm sure you've heard about what happened to me, with the car accident and the amnesia that followed."

⠀oikawa's back stiffened. "believe me, i know all too well."

⠀"i hope you don't mind me just ranting to you," you pursed your lips and hugged your own knees together on the ground, resting your chin atop your kneecaps. "but hajime hasn't told me a thing about my car accident, and it's been getting to my head. he'll tell me vague things before the accident, but never about the accident itself. i just want to know, i want to remember everything myself." looking up at your fellow third you, your head tilted. "wouldn't you want to know?"

⠀this was what iwaizumi was freaking about? tooru had heard of his skirmish with makki and mattsun, but because he wasn't on speaking terms with any of them, he couldn't go up and ask them for confirmation. he was almost angry - who was iwaizumi to keep your life locked away from you? it was the perfect chance to throw tooru under the bus, but he never took it. why?

⠀"i... would want to know, too." he hated where this conversation was going, but he had no way out of it. he wanted the subject change so badly, but it was coming to a point where it would be suspicious to do so. he wasn't ready. he wasn't ready to face his demons and confront you about the situation. if it was going the way oikawa was imagining it to be, you knew nothing about him. and you were assuming he knew nothing about you, either.

⠀"it's been frustrating. weeks have gone by at this point, and i don't remember a thing. i just want to remember something, anything from what happened."

⠀it was all coming back to oikawa, that dreadful day. the loss against karasuno, the words that hurt you, and the way your unconscious body was in iwaizumi's arms as he told his former captain to never step foot near you again. tooru did good in doing that, as he deserved to never be forgiven for what his immaturity caused - but you made your way back to him time and time again. he didn't know what to make of it, and it drove him crazy.

⠀"i'm sorry, you probably have no idea what i'm talking about." he watched as you stood up, dusting your uniform off as you crossed your arms loosely. "just the ramblings of a little girl, nothing special. thanks for letting me rant, though." you looked down at his knee before locking eyes with tooru once more. "do you need anything before i go? it's getting pretty late."

⠀"i'll be fine. i think i'll get up and get my things in just a few moments. thank you for helping me." to prove his point, he removed his leg from the chair and slowly bent his knee to sit up more. the sting was there, but it was manageable.

⠀"alright." awkward silence ensued, before you bowed quickly. "anyways, sorry for distracting you again, oikawa. see you tomorrow." you turned around and began walking out of the gym, since there was nothing else you could say to keep the conversation going.

⠀"wait!" he stood up, walking fairly slow to catch up to you, which you had already turned around confusedly from the urgency in his voice. you remained silent as he stood right in front of you, hardly any space separating the two of you as he struggled to find the right words to say. "whatever iwaizumi has told you or not," he said quietly, "what i can tell you is that now and before your accident, you're a wonderful person." he swallowed a lump in his throat. "and anyone who ever treats you like shit... doesn't deserve to have you in their life."

⠀mixed feeling arose as he noticed the faint blush color your cheeks subtly, backing up from you after finishing what he wanted to say. "it's not much," he muttered, "but i wanted you to know."

⠀"thank you, oikawa." you nodded your head and smiled. you had an unreadable thought in your eyes as tooru acknowledged your gratitude with a nod of his own, before watching you walk out of the gym rather hastily.

⠀just like that, he had let you slip out of his grasp again.

⠀he waited for you to exit the school before breaking down again in self pity, sliding down against the gym wall and biting his lip quite stubbornly to avoid yelling out in agony.

⠀"anyone who ever treats you like shit," he whispered, "doesn't deserve to have you in their life."

a/n : too dramatic? probably KFKSKFKMD

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[iustories]

The Visitor

IU x Kim Soohyun

Jieun’s POV

Of all the places, I met you here. It's out of the ordinary I'd say, but I knew one day we'll see each other here. Little by little, everything faded before my eyes and I only saw you. You met my gaze with the same warmth and I clearly remembered the last time you looked at me similarly. When was that again? How long has it been since? I could tell you I lost count, but that would be a lie and I'm certain you'd immediately catch it before I even finish my sentence because you know everything about me, except for the part that I loved you I guess.

Loved? Should I be speaking in past tense? Do I still have the same fire burning in my chest? Sometimes I'm confused.

I approached you with caution as I always do, afraid to look eager, but I may give myself away when I smile a tad wider than usual. It can't be helped since you bring it out of me effortlessly and I'm a fool for giving in every damn time. But what is to be terrified about? This strange place will forget me, you, us, and whatever will happen, right? So I'll take my chances.

You rose to your feet with such grace and met me in the middle then pulled me into a tight hug. Ah, it feels like home. It feels like you. Seconds passed and I am still in your arms. I didn't detect any intention of you wanting to let go and it was my cue to allow myself to enjoy this freely. Was I always guilty when you're too close before? Now please don't break free. I promise I won't push you away this time. I'll make you stay.

There were no words spoken, just hearts beating in the same rhythm, speaking things that could not be explained if said.

"I missed you," you whispered, your soft breath tickling my ear.

If it weren't for this place, I would be hesitant to say it back, but since we're here let me just be honest. I'm sorry I had to mask my affection with dry humor. It was the only way I could tell you without actually telling you. "I missed you too. How have you been?"

Of course I'm aware that you're doing fine. You've been busy exploring new activities and having fun with your family. I check up on you from time to time. Despite what happened between us, I still genuinely care for you. "I'm good. And you?"

I was still engulfed in your embrace and if we talk for hours in this position, I wouldn't complain. "I'm okay too. I've been doing things here and there. Nothing really special, but yeah I'm okay."

I still can't conjure coherent sentences without feeling anxious. I mean, being around you still makes me nervous even in this place where nobody knows us.

You finally separated yourself from me, your hands traveling from my back towards my arms. You gripped them firmly then smiled at me, evidently delighted by my sudden appearance, like you've been waiting for me to come.

"Let's sit?" You casually asked and I nodded in response. You dragged me to the couch and motioned your hand, telling me to sit.

"What do you want to watch?" You asked, your eyes directing me to the screen. I turned to your laptop and scanned the selection. Seeing the titles brought a small smile on my lips because it just proves that it's you. Those movies and shows are your favorite. Now I'm sure this is all real.

I pointed at medical drama that you were raving about years ago. When you told me about it for the first time, I gave you a funny look because I didn't perceive you as a sentimental person.

"Good choice," you approved, your lips curving into a satisfied smile as you clicked on the show.

Do we have all the time in the world to watch shows? Can we settle some things first? I don't know how much time we have, so for the sake of my sanity, can we talk? But like in the past, my requests refused to leave my lips because your pleasure is much important than mine. I couldn't help it you know—putting you first. It's ridiculous, yes. But this is how I loved you.

Loved. There it is again. That word. It weighs heavily on me, waking the feelings I've come to abandon over the years as my hope dwindled. Can that word not ring in my head when I look at you? It's really bothersome and I can't focus on the present.

There was a considerable amount of space between us which actually disappointed me since we were always skin to skin. Have we fallen apart completely? Have we created boundaries? A while ago I thought we were back on track.

You must have heard my thoughts because you gradually moved closer until your arm was lightly touching mine and at the initial contact, I almost flinched and had to hold the gasp that was about to escape my lips. It amazes me how you still affect me with such intensity after all these years. I felt you arm hover over my neck and it found its way around my shoulder, causing me to freeze. You quietly tugged me towards you, urging me to relax and be comfortable, so I did. The loud beating of my heart deliberately subsided when you began patting my arm repeatedly. I eased my mind and I ran back to the things I used to do when I'm with you—placing my head on your chest and my arm around your belly.

And here I am again wishing this moment would never end, but I already tried it a couple of times in the past yet we were still separated by fate in the end.

"Jieun-ah," You called my name tenderly.

"Hmm?"

"Do you want to tell me anything?" You asked with a mellow tone, coaxing me.

"Like what?"

"Just anything. Maybe things I don't know?" There uncertainty in your voice, but I heard conviction as well.

Now I wonder if you've known all along. It's not impossible though since people talk and rumors spread quite fast.

Should I be honest or should I lie? Isn't this what I've been imagining—you asking me if I had something to say?

"I won't be mad. Whatever it is just tell me," you reassured me.

I let silence prevail, thinking hard if I should just say the truth. This is the redo that I prayed for, so letting this pass would be another dumb mistake.

"Do you know that I love you?"

Should I have said 'loved'? Which one is appropriate? And why am I answering you with a question? God damn it.

It was your turn to fall silent and tension immediately rose as you let seconds pass. "I know. I've always known."

My heart leaped as a mix of anxiety, fear, and excitement played inside my system. "Really?"

"I could see from the way you looked at me," You explained simply then paused.

"And I looked at you the same, but you never saw it, right?"

I processed your words carefully, afraid I might have gotten the wrong idea, but you interrupted my train of thoughts when you added, "We wouldn't be talking about this if you noticed. I loved you too."

"But things went downhill, didn't it?" I asked, trying to comfort myself from the missed opportunity by blaming it on fate and circumstances.

"It did," you affirmed. "But we could have tried."

"Would you have chosen me?"

You sighed then tightened your hold on me. "Yeah. I would have. Without a doubt."

"So we both ended up being alone after all that," I said chuckling, attempting to dismiss the ache growing inside my chest as regrets threaten to break loose at the gates of my mind.

"I talked a lot about you—no, all I talked about was you." I felt you shake your head, your chin brushing against the top of my head a few times. "I couldn't tell you too so I told other people."

"What were we so afraid of?" I asked, hoping that you had an answer. If we loved each other then, what was stopping us?

"Hurting others? We thought of them first before us."

Right. I almost forgot. Other people. We weren't selfish enough to take it to another level because of others or rather this person we both held close to our hearts. Our friend.

"Did we do the right thing?" I'm desperately seeking reprieve because I am being chased by the consequences of that decision.

"Yeah, I think we did," you answered as you peeked at my face and I wasn't quick enough to hide the sadness that was etched on it. "I'm sorry, Jieun-ah. I know I gave you a hard time. I know you've been waiting."

I bit my lip to control its trembling. The show continues to play on the screen, but it only served as the noise that filled the void when we fail to answer quickly.

"But doing the right thing doesn't always make us happy," you continued. "So are you happy now?"

I parted my lips yet nothing came out. Am I really happy without you? Am I truly resigned to the future I have in mind?

"Am I?" I stroked my chin as if I was really thinking of it, but in all honesty, I couldn't get myself to do it because I'm scared to know the answer.

You chuckled then ran your fingers down the length of my hair and I instinctively shut my eyes as the calming sensation of your touch registered. "I may be doing great, but I couldn't say I'm entirely happy."

Your answer surprised me. Even though you've confessed your feelings just a while ago, I couldn't wrap my head around it yet. How can I? I imagined hearing those words from you for quite a long time until I gave up, therefore everything may be happening inside my head.

"Me too." I was suddenly feeling hopeful since we are in another place. We were just two people who met unexpectedly so maybe this time I can fulfill my wishes. "So can we start again? If we aren't happy after what we've done, can we do what we want this time?"

You sighed again. What is it with the heavy sighs and the tone you've been using? Isn't this supposed to be a do-over, the clean slate that we both wanted? There isn't anyone who could hold us back anymore.

"I'm afraid we can't," you replied in a regretful tone.

You are so good at putting the pieces of my heart back together and breaking it right after. Hasn't this happened countless times already? Aren't you tired of hurting me?

"Why? What is our excuse this time?" I asked, my jaw clenching.

"We just can't."

"At least give me something I can understand. This is too much."

You kissed the top of my head. "This is not real, Jieun-ah"

"It is! What are you saying?"

"You know from the start this isn't real," you pressed further.

I gulped hard, my breathing becoming shallow and rapid. "Do we have to do this again?"

How many times do I have to lose you? How many times do you have to come back and remind me that you are not mine? You've been consistent at that and that's why I couldn't let you go that easily.

"Yes. We must go our separate ways again. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. But I'm glad I saw you here."

Just as tears trickled down my face, my eyes fluttered open. My heart was pounding erratically against my chest as your voice echoed repeatedly in my brain. I'm glad I met you here. I felt the wetness of my pillow and realized that I shed some tears while I was asleep.

You, my frequent visitor, the person of my dreams, came to make your presence felt again. Indeed, you know when to remind me of you when I start to forget.

#stories

[markitaaa]

Husband Tag - Bang Chan

    "Chris, where are you? Are you ready yet?" Yells a woman as she waited in her room. She had rich and warm mahogany skin with jet black curly hair to her shoulders.

She was in a yellow tube top to compliment her skin tone, holding her Galaxy phone in her right hand waiting for her husband to take a seat next to her in front of her tripod.

"I'm right here princess." Bang Chan, or as his wife likes to call him, Chris, enters the room.

"About time slow poke."

He laughs as he takes a seat beside her. "I told you to give me 10 minutes to finished eating. It hasn't even been 5."

She pouted at him playfully, pulling his dimpled cheek. "I'm sorry baby. I'm just so excited to do this video."

"You're excited to do a cliché couples video for your channel?" He asks, raising a sarcastic eyebrow.

"Oh shut up, Chris. It'll be fun." She asks as she fixes her tube top, pulling it up.

Chris fixes his gaze to her chest. "Olivia, you gonna wear that top on camera?"

She fixes her gaze on him then her chest. "Why? What's wrong with it?"

"Um...it's just a really tight shirt, and you're well endowed so..."

She just chuckles at him. "Babe, it's summertime and it's hot as hell outside. There's nothing wrong with my shirt."

Chris sighs shaking his head, but smiles. "Alright, prepare for the comments about your chest."

"Hope they're good comments." She says, winking at him and seductively shakes her chest in front of the camera that was currently still off.

Chris frown at her, bumping her shoulders with his. "Stop playing."

She laughs as she leans in to give his cheek a kiss. "I'm sorry papi, I'll only shake my chest for you."

He smiles at that. "Damn right, now can we start this video?"

"Yes we can," She says fixing his blonde bangs to show more of his face. She turns on on the camera, ready to make this Husband Tag video her 1.3 million subscribers had requested of her.

She had repeatedly talked about Chris in her previous videos many of times and viewers were curious who he was, so she decided to do this video.

"Hi Lovelies, I'm Olivia and today for this video I have my incredible Husband Chris with me to do the highly requested Husband Tag." Olivia says as Chris begins to playfully clap saying Yay.

She playfully rolls her eyes. "Now introduce yourself silly."

Chris lifts up his right hand, as if telling someone to stop and says, in his most Aussie accent, "Hi guys, My name is Chris, Olivia's incredible Husband." Then laughs.

"You are so goofy, anyways let's get on with the questions." Olivia says as she tries to locate her phone. "You have my phone Chris?"

"What?" He asks, laughing at little. "Why are you asking me? You just had it in your hand."

"Because there's only two people in this room, in this house, so if I don't have it, you do."

"See what I go through guys?" Chris asks as he shakes his head mockingly to the camera.

Olivia checks under their chairs. "See, Chris! It's under your chair! I knew you had it!"

He just grins at her. "I don't know how it got down there. Last time I saw it, it was in your lap. Maybe it fell when you were shaking your chest for me." He cheekily replies as he eyes your chest.

You slap his shoulder and grabbed his chin, turning his face forward. "Hush."

He just continue to grin at the camera.

"Anyways, we're gonna start off with the questions. Okay Chris, if I could be any mythical creature, what would it be and why?"

"Oh, that's easy. A mermaid."

"And why?

"Because one of your favorite Disney movie as a little girl was The Little Mermaid." He explains effortlessly.

"Hm, I guess you're right." She shrugs.

"Of course I am Liv, I know you." He says, stretching out a curl.

She doesn't mind as she asks the next question. "Okay, who approached who first?"

Chris let's go of the curl he was playing with and says, "Are you giving me easy questions on purpose to make me look good?"

"Babe, no. We're only getting started." She smirked at him.

He knew that look, she was up to know good. He just didn't know what yet.

"Well?" She asks.

"You approached me first."

"When, where how?"

He had to think for a second, it's been a while. "5 years ago at Uni. I was a freshman and you a junior. I was studying music and you business. I saw you around a few times because your brother and became friends when I started there. I remember our friends trying to get us together but I wasn't having it because I wanted to focus on school. I even heard from your friend that you thought I was fine." He says, laughing remembering his freshman year.

Olivia continues, "Right guys. He would not give me the time of day. It wasn't like I was chasing after him or nothing, never that." She says, playfully fluffing up her hair. "All I said to my friends was that, 'I wonder who that fine Asian boy is?' And they just ran with it. So one day at a party I cornered Chris and made my presence known. He liked my straightforward attitude and the rest was history."

"Now that I think about it, our friends did try to play Cupid too hard." Chris says smiling.

"Well, I'm not mad at them. They did us a favor. We've been married 3 years now. I love you babe." She says leaning in to kiss his cheek.

"Okay, I love you too crazy girl. Now on to the next question."

"Okay, you know I want kids, but what do I want my first kid to be?"

"Want it to be? You speaking like it's an object."

"Chris, stop being technical and answer the damn question." She asks shaking her head.

He smiles. "You want twins, a boy and a girl."

"You're correct. Good job." She says, preparing for the next question. "What do you love about me?"

"You really want me to get sappy on camera?" He asks, shaking his head.

"Tik Tok, Mr.Bang"

"Alright woman. I'm not gonna say I love everything about you because that's too unrealistic. I love how strong and characteristic you are. How you never let anything get you down and when you see someone else down, you give it your all to make them feel better. You're sweet when you want to be and my heart. Without you, I honestly didn't think I would have graduated college because I had to much stress from my parents but you pushed and I'm honestly thankful to you and for you because I would definitely have been single and lonely, so what I'm trying to say is, I love you with all my heart, Olivia Melissa Bang."

"Chris," Olivia says wiping her eyes. "You're only supposed to say like two or three qualities you love about me, not a tearful speech."

"I can't just list a few baby, there's too many. Just know that I love you." He answers back as he gets up from his chair to hug her."

"Ugh, I'm gonna kill you for messing up my makeup Chris." She playfully complains as he wipes her drenched cheeks.

He laughs. "You're still beautiful love."

"Ugh, I don't think I can continue this video. I'm too emotionally happy right now." She says fanning her face.

Chris takes his seat again, pouting. "Aw, but it was starting to get fun."

She giggles at him. "Okay, one more question you big baby."

"Alright, shoot." He says, leaning back in his chair comfortably.

She takes a small deep breath, her hear pounding. "So Chris, how do you feel about us becoming parents?"

"Parents? That would be awesome. We aren't trying but we said if it happens, it happens." He shrugs, looking at her curiously, he knew she was up to something.

A large grin slowly spreads across. "Well baby, it happened.

"What?!" Chris springs up from his chair, leaning towards you. "You serious? Don't play with me."

Olivia pulls out the three pregnancy tests from her jean shorts. "Congratulations, Appa."

Chris immediately jumps out of his chair cheering loudly and engulfs you in a hug. "I'm gonna be a dad! You're gonna be a mom! We're gonna be parent's! I knew you were up to something!"

Olivia laughs excitedly. "Well, I already know you knew me so well. I just wanted to mess with you a little bit and announce it to my subscribers."

"You are so sneaky!" He says tightening his hold on her. "But I love you." And kisses her forehead.

"Love you too, daddy." She says, winking at him then at the camera.

#ambw kpop #ambw #kpop #korean #black #black women #blackgirlmagic