#im in my final year and idk if ill make it literally BECAUSE im. i cant fucking do this?

[celestial-sapphicss]

.

#so i just finished s1ep2 of the bear (i don't really get it so far but ok) #and there's this scene where the main character calls up his sister and tells her about the mental shit that has been happening with him uk #and like even though this feeling is always there but lile i can't help but feel like my life would have been so much better with a sibling? #like one id have good relationships with uk??? #and ik ik found family and forming meaningful relationships outside is an option but like in this capitalistic individualist society? is it? #anyways that's not the point it's that there's always stuff no body in the world would get except people who grow up with you innit? #be it school or hometowns or families and it would have been nice to have someone help me not feel this complete overwhelmness all the time #and without me feeling like im exaggerating or thinking that the person would judge me or having to keep telling everything repeatedly #but then i think would that even matter when I am the one who's the problem and like can't work to form that connection with anyone????? #like i for the life of me cannot share anything beyond the surface level or without making a joke out of it #and it seems funny but i trivialise so much of the fucking shit that happens so obviously no one takes it seriously not their fault right? #and like how fair to my friends that i literally almost always been superficial and lowkey untrue with them in exchange for their honesty??? #at this point i feel like i don't even know what i truly feel or truly am because whenever i look back at my past self im like wtf #idk most of the times it just feels like being 'stuck' in a glass container and me not 'letting' anyone in if that makes sense? #ik im being very annoying about it but im just so tierd of feeling like this its been a decade & its way too long to constantly feeling dead #and im so fucking stubborn in my sadness that i won't even go get help after years of crying about wanting it & now finally having resources #it's like this mental block which i can't seem to remove and i feel like even if i do get help ill still be untrue so what's the point!??? #yeahhhhh anyways i'll delete this later i don't journal so tumblr will have to make do #vi.txt

[holytrickster]

listen i dont like fëanor but i can't deny that getting so mad you literally burst into flames and crumble away into ash is kinda fucking relatable

#i was about to go “do i have to tag this for spoilers” in my own head as though the silm isnt literally older than me #tbf not as many people read it as lotr or the hobbit but still. come on brain wtf #esp since someone would have to be really weird to come on my blog specifically to complain about spoilers lmao #i do think its funny I've only now gotten around to readinf it but its taking me so long to make myself listen to it that i keep forgetting #things especially in the really long chapters #to the extent now i find myself going “oh maybe i need to write down names because of course everyone has to start with an f”. i was doing #okay and then i went a really long time without reading so now im like wait wait go back #which sucks because i usually dont have trouble getting through long books. admittedly i listen more than read lately #but still. i think it took me maybe a week to get through priory the first time? like i dont think its that im not interested i just havent #had a lot of energy to expend or to get really into things? idk i keep forgetting from finals up till now has been extra bad in terms of.. #..pain. chronic migraines gonna migraine ig. i bitch about it like i havent lived this way for years n years. but they were never as bad.. #..until i started college and now theyve been worse than ever. i hate thinking about how much time i always lose. how much time ill always #be losing. sorry how the fuck did this turn into a tangent.

[s4pphoiduser]

microdosing coming out by macrodosing "ooo i wanna look Just Like Him. HIM. HE HIM HIM HIM. JUST LIKE HIM." like oh look at the broad shoulders and wide, flat chest. oh, oh, so interesting, isn't it? wouldn't it be fun if i were a guy? imagine That!

#me randomly throughout the day: [showing a picture of some guy] don't you think it'd be so nice if i looked JUST LIKE HIM? hehe #being trans is fun #incoming in the tags: #dysphoria #sometimes i feel like maybe im not actually trans and that im just ~an imposter~ because it's ''''''trendy'''''' #and then i remember that i literally cannot bear calling myself a girl + my chest makes me so.... [no words for it] + #everytime i have to accept what i have DOWN THERE whenever i pee or like idk put on underwear i have to like. #pretend that i dont know what what i have is and that i am a small child again who does not know that people have different parts #until like. halfway through last year i thought everyone wanted to be out of the skin they were born in. i thought it was a normal thing #brought on by puberty. #and i also thought that maybe i just felt that way because i didn't look ~conventionally attractive~ #but then i started ~working on myself~ and changing these things and i still couldn't stand the fact that this was my skin. #that i couldn't tear it away so i could finally be ~real~ #i remember that i was watching a video and i thought he looked cool but at the same time the voice in my head that was like #'you want to look like THAT so bad and that's going to k ill you' and i had to pause the video and look away for a sec because #i couldn't accept that i just didn't look like that.... #like yeah dude. you're trans #not 'not like other girls' in a pick me way but 'not like other girls' in that im a guy and feel incredibly alien in my body #sorry i started talking about all that. i'll tag it no worries

[devotedlystrangewizard]

i hate it so much when people try to tell me how to study because every single method feels like trying to shove a balloon through a brick wall

#i cant study. like actually #schoolwork isnt just not fun to me its. actual torture #i always start crying while doing homework because my brain is just so fucking foggy i cant ??? function??? #i cant retain information im not interested in but let me do you one better. i cant even consume it in the first place #im not. a functional person #im in my final year and idk if ill make it literally BECAUSE im. i cant fucking do this? #personal #btw #and jts always 'well at least try to study its only one more year' I GOT THROUGH HIGH SCHOOL. BECAUSE OF COVID #I NEVER WOULD HAVE REACHED THIS POINT IF IN MY THIRD YEAR THE SCHOOL HADNT SAID 'ok everyone passes' #AND I NEED THIS? #DROPPING OUT IN THIS COUNTRY EVEN AT 18 IS NIGH ON ILLEGAL #gifted kid syndrome was never about reading better than the rest of ur class when u were 8 bc u were a nerd #its about always being fucking praised for every minor thing and then growing up to be completely useless #and its stupid! i KNOW my life is allowed to exist i KNOW im not useless i KNOW that i deserve better than what ive gotten up till now #but im so fucking sick of the constant 'oh you can do better' and my classmates going 'oh ur so smart ahaha' and just. #the dchool system wasnt made to support anyone ever #it supports the average child with average intelligence who works and studies and that child is so fucking rare #and its even worse when my sister is doing a level higher than me is doing a sport AND is looking for a job #and shes fine! she gets good grades! but i can barely manage to get through this and everything is just a fucking brick wall #and i keep smashing my head against it trying again and again to get through but all im getting is another fucking headache #i hate people who say shit like 'ooh videogames ruin ur school life' bc videogames are the only things in my life rn i can think about #without feeling like shit! #i csn ramble about videogame lore for 6 hours or i can sob uncontrollably there is no difference i am not a fucking person anymore #autistic burnout gang lmao i am losing my fucking mind #every time i try explaining it to someone its just 'well just try' IVE TRIED. FOR THE PAST SEVEN YEARS. ITS ENOUGH. IM DONE. #anyway thats the story of how i ended up crying about my french exam tomorrow #it is 2 am #i have to figure out a dessert for christmas i can barely fucking breathe and i am once again trying to make as little sound as possible #im so tired

[in-som-niyah]

hi!! i’m literally so obsessed with your work i’ve been scrolling your profile all day 😭😭 i was wondering if you could write something about jason x fem!reader getting married? mostly fluff but ill never say no to some good smut

a/n: "i’m literally so obsessed with your work i’ve been scrolling your profile all day" WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNNNN STOP UR GONNA MAKE ME CRY THIS IS EVERYTHING TO ME HELLO??? like wdym u like my work so much u spend so much time on my blog i love u gimme kiss

anyway this prompt is *chefs kiss* bc we all know Big Bad Jason Todd™ is such a loverboy softie but most of all he loves hard.

I think that before he met you he never thought that he would be so enamoured with someone who also feels the same way about him at the same time, that also wants to marry him??? He thinks he's too flawed and violent and abrasive for someone to even like being around him. So marrying him??? haha you're funny.

But after YEARS (yes, it takes him years of a committed relationship with you to fully trust that you actually like being with him for an extended period of time, let alone forever) of handling his emotions, outbursts and injuries with grace while still giving him a whack at the back of his head when he's being stupid, he considers marrying you.

Remember, Jason Todd is fucking scared himself, and he doesn't want to scare you off with a ring that literally promises forever with him. Though he loves you, he wants you to be happy in the end. Will you be happy with him in the end?

It takes a lot of mental and emotional strength to overcome these fears that swirl around his head.

When he does get over it though, he's so attentive yet sneaky when picking your ring. There's a luxury jewellery store on the way to your favourite clothing store at the mall, and he literally takes you to the whole mall just to pass by the store. He always looks to see what your eyes catch, what you like and don't like. Doesn't matter if he ends up spending hundreds since you're at the mall so much, he'll do it just to make sure he gets exactly what you want.

Jason also uses his extensive detective training to find out what cut and stone you want on the ring. He's ok with diamonds, but would want something more unique and personal for his love. He wants something that always reflects you, no matter the occasion.

Side note: once the ring comes he would definitely put together a photo album of pics he took of the ring in plain sight while you're completely oblivious just for shits and giggles

Finally, when it's time to pop the question, he doesn't do flashy and big productions with lights and letters and petals and stuff.

He would be dancing in the kitchen with you on a lazy Saturday, eating pancakes and bacon and when the song ends just casually asks "if I were to ask you, would you marry me?" Now he looks collected as he lovingly smiles down at you but is actually shitting himself until you say that you would in fact marry him if he asked. Then he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out the most perfect, detailed, gorgeous ring you could ever ask for while properly asking you to marry him. Cue the waterworks (from both of you) and the celebratory make-out sesh.

Y'all definitely fucking the night of the proposal though

I feel like it would be realllllly possessive since yk you literally belong to him now

"tell me who this pussy belongs to, pretty girl" Knowing full well you can't answer because your eyes have already rolled back mid-stroke and you're babbling incoherently. It does, however, put a smug ass smirk on his face.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a/n pt2 bc i can't shut up: i hope u like it!!! i wasn't in the mood to write anything smutty but idk im in my soft era for jason i just want his stoic self to love me :(((((

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #red hood #jason peter todd #jason todd x you #jason todd smut #red hood x reader #dcu #jason todd comfort #dc red hood #the red hood #red hood imagine #red hood smut #red hood x you #under the red hood #batfam #arkham knight x reader #arkham knight #robin jason todd #dc jason todd #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd fic #jason todd fluff #jason todd imagine #jason todd x black!reader #jason todd headcanon

[rainswept]

you ask for Fontaine brain rot/reqs, I deliver.

So idk if you've done the recent archon quest and lyney/lynette story quest so if you haven;t be careful caus i will be spoling !

SO

That part where Lyney is freaking out over Freminet and Lynette had me SCREAMING especially since ive done their story quest AND ALSO FRIENDSHIP 10 LYNEY SO I HAVE THE LORE AND IT HURTS SM but I won't spoil all that for u-

so anyways, i started thinking, imagine Lyney has a lover who's been with the siblings for years (and also works for Arlecchino) and is considered another sibling by Lynette and Freminet. They were also diving with Freminet when they encountered water from the primordial sea

now imagine clorinde can only take one person with her at a time when she pulls them back, and she saves Freminet first, later going back for Lyney's s/o

Eventually Freminet wakes up like he does in the quest, but the reader just.. doesn't. Hours pass and the siblings are freaking tf out because they don't want to lose anyone.

(now I can't decide if I crave angst or if I want to comfort my babies so ill give my headcanons for both shiguegoe)

angst: Lyney's lover keeps deteriorating, parts of them gradually turning blue and quite literally withering away (caus you know the water and the dissapearances- yeah-) and the siblings can do nothing but watch

Lynette shuts down more frequently and for longer periods, not even saying anything to Lyney

Freminet blames himself for not noticing sooner, for not getting them out sooner

And then there's Lyney.. he blames himself for not only putting his siblings in danger, but losing his lover...

He sits by their bed watching as they wither away, holding their hand. He knows Father will be upset by his lack of comitment to the mission but he can't bring himself to care

The day they pass, no one says a word. They continue with their mission, report to Father, go on with their Fontainian lives until they're alone and they cry. they cry and scream and curse whatever archons or god's are listening.

AND NOW BEFORE I CRY THE HAPPIER VERSION

After days of not waking up, they finally open their eyes.

Lyney is fretting over them asking if they know where they are, who he is, what happened etc

now to throw in a tidbit of angst, what if they awoke with some disability? like they cant see anymore, they can't hear properly, cant walk properly etc

Lyney and Freminet would devasted because they blame themselves. Lynette would be quick to remind her brothers at least everyone is alive.

It'd be bad because with a disability, they can't work for Father anymore, or at least not the way they used to

AHHEOGUHEOG im stuck in a neverending brain rot my guy

Anyways. I was actually going to request for you to write your own take on this but you don't have to if you dont want- even just hearing your take would be nice lmao

also if its ok i reallly wanna be mutuals! I just found you blog and im obssesed!! I really wanna be friends<3

NO BECAUSE I SCREECHED SO LOUD MULTIPLE TIMES READING THIS !! THANK U SO MUCH YES OFC I WANNA BE MUTUALS/FRIENDS!! genuinely absolutely made my day to have u ask that oh my god??

also don’t worry about spoiling anything for me, i’ve read every little bit of lyney/lynette/freminet lore out there 😭 and i’ve done all of the new fontaine archon quests already (i need help. it’s okay though!)

as for angst — u know me so well already this is my forte. cracks knuckles here i go

freminet feels as if something is off.

already beginning to panic, he turns to you in a hurry. the water swishes in his ears. when you meet his gaze, wide-eyed, the gut ‘feeling’ turns into a full-blown punch to it. oh, now he realizes; he can’t breathe. his heart’s racing, chest tightening and throat feeling as if it’s closing up.

you reach out, and exchanging unspoken words, you two turn around and make to retrace your patterns with haste. hand in hand, you race against frittered time; but even your best efforts are not enough, and the both of you are forced to acknowledge it when freminet’s vision begins to turn spotty.

he got in the water first; he’s gone before you are. his body floats limp beside you as you drag him along through the water, even as the surroundings grow hazy for you, too. a cold tingle runs up your spine as you consider the possibility; is this the end?

(when you had left for the pipes, the most you had exchanged with lyney was a quick kiss on the cheek as a goodbye. that wouldn’t do.)

but even as you try desperately to cling to life .. the “sea” is a cruel thing, and it does not care for your mortal frivolities. (a proper goodbye? .. foolish.) with cold, disorienting water enveloping your senses from all sides, your only grounding thing being freminet’s (rapidly cooling) fingers against yours — it didn’t take long before you succumbed to the “sea”, too.

(your last thought as the world went dark was “i’m sorry.”)

(even in your barely conscious state, you feel another wave of panic surge through you when freminet’s fingers slip away from yours — but you don’t have enough energy to hold on.)

reader lives:

the incessant thrum of the water rushing through pipes rattled in your ears. your whole body was sore, weak and tired; and all of your limbs felt like lead attached to you via shoddy workmanship. your head hurt like hell, and what’s worse is that the moment you opened your eyes, you were immediately met with the sight of the three people you cherished most.

first, there was freminet, who was sitting on the bed opposite to yours. his posture fixes from a slouch into proper the moment he spots you, perhaps in.. excitement? shock? you weren’t sure. his eyes lit up, though.

second, there was lynette. she was .. a bit more on edge than usual. that was .. to be expected, of course, but really. you were out for.. what, an hour or two? come on, all four of you put yourselves in danger all the time. what was different about this?

(what was different was the fact that you were not out for an hour or two. no, make that days. they were sure to remind you of this.)

then, there was lyney. for him, the world seemed to stop.

lyney, who was pacing the room in sheer desperation. he walked and walked, boots timed and in tune with the clocks and dripping water from the pipes. in his nervousness, he had unwittingly created a quite fitting melody.

(the only sounds once he ceases walking are the clocks and the water dripping from the pipes.)

lyney, who had rushed to your bedside the moment he had noticed you were up. he looked exhausted, but the second you were awake the mask was .. attempted .. to be put back on. however .. it didn’t take someone as observant as you, or even one who knew him so well, to notice that it was placed crooked.

(how absurd he looked, trying to put on a front everyone in the room knew was one.)

why, even, you would have bet that it could’ve been surmised by a child. once again, emphasis on ‘you would have’, for there was no time for thinking about that when he rushed to your bedside and enveloped you into an embrace. you didn’t miss the way his fingers grasped at the back of your shirt in downright desperation.

(in clear, bold letters, it reads; “if nothing else, please let this be real.”)

he slots himself beside you and, wordlessly, holds you close. he doesn’t need words — neither of you do. this is enough.

lynette and freminet looked on, neither of them opening their mouths when lyney buries his face into the crook of your neck and stays there for just a bit too long. he doesn’t cry. instead, he whispers shakily against your skin; “i thought i’d lost you.”

(the only sounds once he ceases speaking are the clocks and the water dripping from the pipes.

(no one speaks up just yet.)

(the only sounds in the room are the clocks and the water dripping from the pipes.)

(you’re starting to think those were the only sounds ever there.)

when he finally pulls away, you notice he’s fixed his mask. lyney now smiles, and the shake in his voice is gone; but you know it’s not all better, not when he refuses to leave the infirmary even after sigewinne and the traveler inquire. you know it’s not all better, not when the four of you are alone again. lyney sits beside you on the bed, refusing to so much as stand up (he doesn’t want to let go of your hand. you don’t comment on it, but his fingers are still shaky as he holds onto yours like they’re a lifeline.)

you don’t exchange as much as a single word after that. you just bask in each other’s presence, apologies and pleas and “i love you” shared during every lingering glance between everyone in the room.

the four of you don’t need words. this is enough.

reader dies:

seven mistakes went unnoticed. seven signs went unfollowed. seven things (and five people) went wrong that day.

one: freminet.

it was entirely freminet’s fault, he thinks, it was. if only he had gotten you out of there in time. no — he shouldn’t have even brought you. he sits on the infirmary bed opposite to yours, knees pulled up to his chest, and he clutches pers with a death grip. he dips his head in such a way that his face is hidden with his hair; he doesn’t want to let lyney and lynette see him in this state. they have enough to deal with.

two: the primordial sea.

but they were bound to notice eventually, right?

“it was entirely the primordial sea’s fault,” lynette would remind, hand on freminet’s shoulder. “it wasn’t yours.”

the primordial sea. the cold and vicious waters were such a contrast to those he held so dear; what was typically calming and merciful turned to something suffocating and terrifying. but that didn’t change the fact that it was an inanimate thing.

he drops pers at the contact; it clatters to the floor; he looks down, wide-eyed and apologetic; he reaches down to pick it up. lynette does not put her hand on his shoulder again.

three: wriothesley.

“it was entirely wriothesley’s fault,” lyney wants to scream. he’s frantic, pacing the infirmary and voice cracking every time he speaks. lynette and freminet have seldom seen him so panicked. he needs to do something, he needs— he can’t. he can’t leave. once he gets his hands on wriothesley, he swears he’ll—

four: clorinde.

it was entirely clorinde’s fault. it was entirely her choice to pick only one of you to save. no one can bring themselves to be upset at her, for she did try to save both of you. but the realization slowly dawns upon the three children of the house of the hearth still with a steady heartbeat; it was either going to be you or freminet.

they realize this at different times. every time they do, they exchange a silent, quick glance.

freminet would’ve gladly given up his life. lyney and lynette, however .. they would not have been able to choose.

five: the gods.

it was entirely the gods’ fault. curse the gods, lyney thinks. he’s still pacing the room, and while he never put much stock in the divine, he was practically yelling at them now. he knew it wasn’t logical. but he needed something. what was the point of a god if not to help their people? what was the point of a god if just to watch people suffer like it’s an opera?

was she here now? was she watching? was this a “twist” for her? did she delight in this?

six: lyney.

it was entirely lyney’s fault. he shouldn’t have let you or freminet go. he shouldn’t have. he shouldn’t have let wriothesley play him like he was a deck of cards in his hands. this was all his fault. all his fault. he knew of the prophecy, dedicated his whole life to it — and yet hadn’t managed to save you from its clutches?

seven: you.

in truth — it was no one’s fault. but lyney is still pacing the room, breathing getting heavier and more rapid every time he steals a glance at you. lynette’s eyes still trace his every move, conveniently ignoring the sight of you as best she could; and freminet still has his face buried in his knees as to not look at your decaying body.

none of them can deal with the fact that it was simply an accident. no one meant for this to happen — there was no one to blame.

they needed someone to blame.

so each and every one of them blamed themselves. as lyney’s fingers grasped your cold ones, he squeezed them softly even as they began to turn blue beneath his grasp. he couldn’t bare to let you go.

and after three long days, the sun rose to find your bed empty where you had laid. you were nowhere to be found. for a moment, lyney’s heart practically leapt out of his chest, wondering .. did you get up?

but as he rushes to the bedside, his face falls. he should’ve known not to get his hopes up.

the blankets were damp where you had laid, soaked with water just as the stage in the opera epiclese had been.

lyney didn’t cry, nor did lynette or freminet.

they didn’t exchange so much as a word the day you died.

instead, they put their aching hearts and empty souls into the mission at hand. they worked twice as hard to distract themselves, and they provided excellent results for “father” — but they had barely worked together to do so.

they exchanged cold words and they held each other at night, when the pain became too much — because as much as they tried to pretend like nothing happened, that was a lie, just as the rest of their existence — but there was no mistaking it. they were now divided.

there was always you. and now there wasn’t.

lynette was the one who informed “father” of your .. whereabouts. lyney couldn’t bring himself to.

#✦ . ⁺ 🌧️ i. divinity at its finest. #🌧️ ii. to weep on one’s throne. #🌧️ ii. to hold tears gently. #⚖️ iii. verdict? #⚖️ iii. guilty. #⚖️ iii. the court of fontaine. #⏳ v. hotel bouffes d’ete. #| this got a little lyney-centric i apologize #i feel like i could’ve done this waayyyyy better but i just wanted to get the brainrot out #auughghhh #maybe i’ll redo it later #lyney #lyney x reader #genshin x you #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x you #freminet #lyney and lynette #lynette #lyney x gender neutral reader #lyney x y/n #lyney x you

[aragonlediagon]

Touhou 1 HRtP Konngara and Shingyoku vibing

Took me a whole week to make it, this is my "big" drawing for 2023

I wanted to draw something pink and bright and cute :) even if theyre in Jigoku there. Its a rare garden of the pc98 Jigoku idk.

I probably put too much time and effort making content of touhou characters nobody cares about in the west. "But OP i do care" then PLEASE invade my DMs idk because im lonely and I want to actually talk about HRtP with other people who like it thank you very much.

Answering already some questions that I got on other places:

"Is Konngara a guy here?" Yes he is. I always thought of the character as male since the first time I played HRtP (my 1st Touhou game) years ago. I know Touhou is known as "girls only party" but HRtP has no canon and characters like Sariel and Konngara are pretty ambigeous so its up to anyones preferences and I wont change my mind.

"Why is Konngara so white" He is wearing kabuki makeup, which is overall my main influence for my take on the design. The sprite always gave me the samurai guy meets dramatic kabuki actor vibes. I also think it makes him stand out and be more unique, not an average swordsman that can be confused with TH2 Meira, especially being a final boss.

"Any reason why picking miko Shingyoku over the other?" Yes, but rather silly reasons. Shingyoku is my favorite Touhou character overall, but I prefer the priest form, for the main reason that I find the design of the miko kind of messy (speaking of the sprite). It always requires me to do some changes when drawing her. For this reason, I tend to neglect her/draw the priest form more. So I picked her for a bit of change. I also really wanted to draw some ruffles and lace when I started this drawing lol

"Is this ship art?" Yes and no, it depends on you. I do ship Konngara/Shingyoku, its one of my rare touhou ships, but I believe they can 100% be seen as just friends here. I imagined a whole story for these two, and theyre rivals first before becoming close friends then lovers.

"Damn you ship them, Konngara stole the miko from the priest" No. I depict Shingyoku as a kami with shapeshifting as their main ability, so both the miko, priest and yin yang orb forms are the same person. And ill be very honest, im growing tired of the "2 distinct people" take especially since most of the time its not deepened at all, it ditches the yin yang orb form and theyre literally just called "Shin" and "Gyoku". I might sound a bit bitter here and Im sorry, reddit touhou community has been draining me as of late tbh.

Thank you for reading 🌸

#touhou #touhou project #touhou hrtp #touhou pc98 #touhou fanart #konngara #shingyoku #my art

[defiantdreemurrs]

idk if i have the mental energy to go that deep into it this morning but like

i kinda fairly regularly see vriska serket homestuck and asuka langley soryu evangelion compared as “basically the same character” or how vriska is “SUCH an asuka” or vice versa and

they kinda really arent

they both share a surface level similarity of “girl who is fiery and assertive and has a mountain of trauma who picks on a boy she has complicated feelings for” but thats kinda reductive for both their characters

vriska never particularly cares about spotlight or attention. these are not important to her. they have no connection to her trauma. she *does* care about getting to be the big hero, but its not because she wants the attention. hell by the end of her arc she explicitly does not care about glory and is perfectly willing to let (vriska) take all the credit for finding the juju.

vriskas whole deal is just wanting to be a hero. because everypony around her treated her like a bad person. and she never wanted to be a bad person. the things she does in act 5 are very clearly intended to set things in motion that were *already going to happen* so she can insert herself in and be the hero. she wasnt trying to get all her friends killed, she didnt wanna kill anypony, she very explicitly just wanted to be the hero. not for the glory, not for the attention, but for herself.

(im still waking up and i havent read homestuck in a while so whenever my sister wakes up shes the real vriska expert between us so ill let her correct me if i missed anything)

meanwhile.

asuka langley soryu is ALL about the spotlight. ALL about the attention. she wants to be noticed. she wants to be looked at. she pilots eva because she knows shes good at it and thinks if she makes it her whole life then people will finally notice her. because her own trauma is rooted *deep* in it. rooted in being ignored. having her own mother, broken by the contact experiment, pay more attention to a literal doll than to her.

asukas central issue is not one of wanting to be a hero or to atone for anything she might have been made to feel guilty about by her peers. her issue is that she, very much like shinji, is unable to form meaningful emotional connections with others. and not for lack of trying! she spends the whole show throwing herself at a man twice her age who very understandably has zero interest in her because *she is 13 years old*. she also spends it throwing herself at a boy who hates himself soooooooo much hes unable to let his guard down to let her in.

shes not faultless, though. her attempts at forming a connection are halfhearted at best because her traumas have closed *her* off too. she cant find it in herself to be vulnerable with anypony and therefore nopony really feels capable of being vulnerable with her. and she doesnt really understand it.

vriska never really struggles with this though. despite how thoroughly fucked her childhood was she never really worried about being ignored or being *replaced* or treated like an inanimate object or even making emotional connections. shes pretty good at making connections and with her practical inability to lie she really has a hard time *not* being her authentic self.

unlike asuka who, despite being *mostly* her authentic self, still keeps her vulnerable sides hidden. she cant let her guard down. she cant be weak. she cant let anypony take advantage of her. one of the few times shinji sees how much she actually hurts, she manages to deflect by calling him a perv and saying she knew he was staring at her chest the whole time.

and likewise, asuka doesnt really get labeled by everypony around her as a bad person? nor is she concerned with being a hero or trying to show everypony that she isnt a bad person. is she the type to do the thing nopony else seems willing to do? yes, but shes more concerned with finally getting the attention she thinks she deserves (which, yes, she absolutely does deserve it, please just look at this girl please dont ignore her and starve her), and jumping at the chance to do the thing is what she thinks will get her that attention.

this post is starting to run out of steam so ill wrap it up.

so, no, asuka langley soryu is indeed very much *not* a vriska. and vriska serket is very much *not* an asuka. yes they have some similarities yes they are both loud brash girls who receive WAY WAY WAY TOO MUCH SHIT from their respective fanbases by people who dont even bother to engage properly with the source material. hell i would even say theyre similar *enough* that theyd be total besties. but theyre also very much different characters in different stories whose central arcs do not overlap.

one is about learning how to establish connections with others and nurture them into something beautiful. the other is about being the girl who does what nopony else ever seems willing to do, the girl who does the hard things that nopony else ever steps up for. i think both are brilliant characters and both mean so incredibly much to me.

oh also i have explicitly only ever been referring to asuka langley soryu in this post. there is a reason i spelled out her whole name. asuka shikinami is a completely different character who i would argue is *much* closer to vriska than asuka soryu is. but thats a post for another time. this post was primarily only in response to the people i see calling asuka soryu a vriska or calling vriska an asuka.

#asuka langley soryu #asuka soryu #asuka langley #vriska serket #homestuck #neon genesis evangelion #evangelion #vriska

[wishful-seeker]

I will soon be the only person in my close family to not finish college because illness forced me to leave, and thats a strange feeling. Im not sure how i feel about it.

I feel a little alienated because of it, but even though i LOVE learning and i enjoyed college classes, i didn't enjoy college itself.

Even in high school i was the "sick kid" and missed a year there, so feeling like i don't belong isn't new.

But i really thought I'd meet people like me in college, but all i found was snobby rich kids that ignored my existence. I genuinely tried making friends but college students are not my type of people.

I don't know if this is because i wore braces on my knees, or because they could tell i was poor, not sure but college kids always gave me bad vibes.

Im sad that the things im truly passionate about isn't taught in college, and i miss the classes i did have, but i don't think a fancy college was ever my scene. Maybe i would've fit better at a community college. But im probably too disabled to ever find out.

Idk i guess it feels strange because i was heavily encouraged to go to college, and now i can't even if i wanted to. Its weird that i could probably guess the view outsiders have of my life, how they'd feel bad for me, or laugh at what I've become.

And i think of that a lot: how outsiders may view my life. "Oh so sad, look how far she's fallen." Ya know

But im happy

I LIKE my life, sure i got all As and Bs in college, sure i won a writing contest in my class, and yes i also completed a triathlon before all this. So many medals saying "look how hard i worked, look what i accomplished" but when i was accomplishing those trival things i was really lost and alone on the inside, those medals were to convince myself i was better than the years before this one, a lie that i was becoming my best self.

But now all that shit is gone, dead, useless to me. Eventually i was left alone, with NO distractions, only my mind and a body i couldn't move in. Only a bed, in a room, no where else to go. Everything i thought that mattered, everything i connected my worth with, suddenly didn't mean anything anymore, because all that was was my chronic pain, and what i did with it. All that mattered now was fighting for a better life, for freedom from a bed, for freedom within my head.

I had to rebuild myself from nothing, i had to literally rewire my brain. I studied neuroplasticity and my only goal was to train my brain to be able to live with this pain. And i had to change a LOT. I can tell you my mind and the internal dialog in my head is completely different from 2 years ago, and also much a much kinder, and safer place.

So no, i won't finish college, im gonna be poor forever, i wont work, but i am much happier.

I finally feel like the best version of myself. The challenges i face in my life are no longer overwhelming, but a cycle ive grown rather fond of. Im so secure with myself that i can say "this next hardship will be good for me." And i don't think many people have the privilege of being that optimistic when faced with stressful situations.

It would have taken me my whole life to get to this point if i was still focusing on things like grades.

Im happy, and im more proud of myself than when i beat a triathlon, or won art contests.

#yes im romanticizing my pain because its how i cope #im not diminishing it #im not trying to be a “good cripple” #im just being honest #cripple punk #CRPS #disability #chronic illness

[yunalinwrites]

jjk fics i'll never write (but maybe you will!)

i have a bunch of fic ideas i dont think i'll ever get to bc saved by the bell is taking rlly long and i don't have a lot of time (╥﹏╥)

i still wanna see them come to life tho so i think im just gonna throw them out there for anyone who wants to use lol

idk maybe ill write these eventually but even in that case im not gonna stop anyone else from using them as well

go ahead and alter however u like, but tag me if u use!! im letting u peek in my brain >:)

and even if ur not a writer these can just b like imagination prompts for when u go to bed LMAO

"love is work" - nanami kento x reader

summary: title is self-explanatory tbh--the idea that nanami kento views love as work could be applied to any scenario. but, i think it would be interesting for the reader to be the person he meets at the bakery. maybe the bakery is a family business, so the reader's work is literally driven by familial love. although, im not sure if that means they agree or disagree with nanami about love being work.

alternatively, the reader could be a co-worker of nanami's.

conflicts/themes:

serving oneself vs. serving others

what makes love/work worth it?

"meet cute" - fushiguro megumi x reader

there are so many canon strangers to lovers opportunities with megumi lol.

like, being the person "hitting on" (asking for directions from) fushiguro during that one juju stroll.

or the person getting robbed and saved by the 1st year crew, also from juju stroll. (also applicable for yuji and nobara x reader)

there's also the light novel chapter where megumi and yuji stalk gojo at a maid cafe, so maybe the reader works at the maid cafe, and the very stoic but handsome megumi catches their eye. this scenario could also be applicable to yuji x reader or gojo x reader.

there's also an original scenario i was thinking of cuz megumi likes reading (specifically non fiction) so what if the reader was a worker at a book store or a librarian. maybe they know about sorcery already because they read a non-fic book about it and recognize his uniform when he walks in.

also i haven't seen a megumi x tsumiki's friend!reader, esp considering that one girl when tsumiki is confronting megumi about bullying lol. this one could have an interesting conflict bc that girl urged tsumiki to do the test of courage that ended up getting her cursed! so then how would megumi deal with his love interest (the reader) also being the person somewhat at fault for his sister's demise?

not a meet-cute prompt but generally i think it would b interesting in any megumi fic for gojo to be a conflict. like, as megumi's father figure, he doesn't want megumi to end up like him and suguru, so he's very hesitant about letting megumi fall in love with someone since "love is the most twisted curse of them all." but i think in the end, he might realize that love/the reader is exactly what will stop megumi from turning into suguru, so gojo ends up giving the reader his blessing.

"sugar makes blood thicker" - geto suguru x reader

tw: spoilers for gojo's past/hidden inventory/star plasma vessel/premature death arc, angst, DARK CONTENT, self-destructive behaviors, self-harm, eating disorders

summary: reader is a student at jujutsu high in 2006, alongside geto and gojo. reader is from the kamo clan and uses blood manipulation. they've been taught to keep a very strict diet to optimize the viscosity of their blood. just like how geto hates the taste of cursed spirits, reader hates the taste of their diet. they fall in love with each other, because they've finally met someone that makes them feel understood.

if you want to go even darker, the reader's technique may involve cutting (kind of like marie from gen v)

conflicts/themes:

what's the point of fighting for a world that's done nothing for you in return? ("what has the world done for me lately?")

sugar makes blood thicker, which i can imagine is harder to control for a blood manipulation user

gojo satoru is the opposite of the reader: he eats however he pleases, which includes lots of sweets, so it's hard for the reader to be around him/doesn't like him. as a result, it's also hard for geto to have to pick sides between his best friend and the reader

ending: canon ending; geto chooses reader over gojo; they turn evil and run away together with nanako and mimiko. although it could also be interesting for geto to choose gojo over the reader, or if there's somehow a happy ending for everyone here.

I have no title for this one but gojo x megumi's older sister reader

self-explanatory. during the 2006 arc, after gojo kills toji. they raise megumi together <3

"if only i could go back" - any character x reader

summary: this is pretty self-indulgent lol this one's for everyone who wants to heal everyone's trauma and just have a happy ending lmao. i had this idea of the reader either being a sorcerer or a curse who has the power to grant one wish but in doing so sacrifices themselves (they die). so, obviously, they're in high demand by everyone:

megumi wants to heal his sister

gojo wants to bring suguru back

geto wants to rid the world of non-sorcerers

toji wants his wife back

shoko wants her friends back

etc

some situations the reader may find themselves in are being held at the school so that nobody can use their power unless absolutely necessary. or maybe they were captured by the curse users.

technicalities about the reader's power: they can't grant their own wish, but they have full autonomy over whose wish they can grant, meaning the only way that someone could get their wish granted is through befriending and persuading the reader.

conflicts/themes:

characters having to choose between their wish (which kills the reader) and their fondness of the reader (wanting the reader to stay)

will they truly be happy if their wishes are granted?

how does the reader feel about being the method of people's desires but not actually being the desire?

***

alr im done yapping

#jjk x reader #jjk #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #fanfic #my writing #writing #jjk fanfic #jjk x you #geto suguru #geto x reader #geto x y/n #suguru #geto x you #nanami kento #jjk nanami #nanami x reader #kento nanami #suguru geto #jjk megumi #megumi fushiguro #megumi x reader

[griancraft]

Ok as per my last post. This is Long and very much about my feelings so uh don’t read it if you don’t want to. Also I’m aware I sound genujneky crazy for half of this I’m just really really mentally ill in ways I don’t talk about here at all and now I am sharing them and it’s. A little scary but oh well. The system stuff is the stuff I’m most concerned about right now to be honest bc it effects my day to day and if anyone has any kind words or thoughts on what to do I’ll be happy to listen

Please read my previous post if you’re mad /gen I don’t think I say anything bad here but I have really bad morality ocd so like uhm I am scared to post this!!! Prev post

Also I’m very sorry that the prose is terrible to read and my spelling is shit I have dyspraxia which is a coordination thing and it’s worse rn

The maybe I was boring album came on yesterday while I was cleaning and I had to stop what I was doing and turn it off halfway through because I just couldn’t stop hearing an admission. I wasn’t even sad I was just. So done with it. I still am just kinda like. God I hope Shelby is doing ok with all this being public now. I’m glad she was able to heal like she said and I’m glad she made the video dude.

I almost got his lyrics tattooed if that’s testament to how much I loved his early music. It’s not connecting in my brain that this music that’s been apart of my life for like 4 years and helped me through so much was made by an abuser.

But like, in retrospect you can see it. I can’t bear to delete ycgma off my mp3 player bc I related to his songs so much as an abused lonely teenager but I also can’t bare to listen to it. I learned the fall on my guitar as my final exam and I used to repeat his lyrics to myself to cope with abuse and I wish I could still love these songs. I dressed like his dsmp character bc I thought it made me look cool. Which is lame as fuck to admit now lol

Originally I was planning on pirating them and I like, can’t especially after that manipulative ass statement. How much was an act? I don’t know. I don’t know if I’m a bad person because I still kinda do want to listen to that music again. I still want to feel that safe but I know I won’t feel that way anymore.

with dsmp stuff I think I’m going to be still able to look back fondly on it generally and I don’t think I’ll ever stop. The community was what made it and the community is what I loved, and i still do. I don’t think I’m going to reblog art of him specifically but if he’s in it I might. Idk. My policy on dream fanart is if he’s not alone in the art and it’s dsmp or mcc related I reblog so I guess I’ll continue that here. Im sorry if that sounds callous I just. Am not prepared to talk about this so I’m going back and forth

And like. We also have a wilbur factive/fictive and we have for years now and nobody in our system knows how to feel about that. He formed to fill the role of a big brother (I was being heavily emotionally neglected at that point and needed someone to be there for me) and protector from my parents abuse. Obviously, he is entirely separate from his source now bc alters change a lot for me but how we picture him is still wilbur. he’s literally just some guy now but grappling with that connection is fucked up dude it’s weird. He’ll probably further distance himself but it still fucking sucks and I don’t know how to communicate the cognitive dissonance we had to push through bc our brain struggled at first to make sense of how this person who we liked so much that he became the template for a Protector to shield us from the emotional neglect and abuse, essentially, is a terrible person. I’m sorry I know people who aren’t systems, and some who are ngl, will find this fuckibg nuts and I get that but we’re a very very internal person like I just. Kinda am with us as a system a lot and nobody else. It feels like my safe space that I’ve created in my head has been marred. Also. uhm. Our alters speak in distinct voices so it’s bad bad for me rn and we are trying to fix it. I know I know fictives and factives arenttheir source but that doesn’t change that it makes me feel gross. I’m rambling rn I’m sorry. Support Shelby.

#tw abuse #discourse #vent

[ackermanbitch]

Teenage Dirtbag (Peter Parker x F!Reader) Part Two

a/n: yes i finally did it bitches, i think the first one will get more attention if i put out a better, second part. i might redo the first part at some point cus its kind of cringe and i wrote it a year ago. also, taking away reader's powers cause i cant find a logical explanation for her to even have any LMAO i really only gave her any because i wanted her to have a reason to be there when tony died but idk ill figure smth out OK IM DONE TALKING ENJOY READING

Part Three

pairing: peter parker x fem!stark!reader

warnings: cussing, math😧, reader simping for may if u squint

word count: 1.6k

Peter Parker. The absolute nerdiest nerd of Midtown. How did a Stark of all people notice him? She can't do math. And math was slightly important if you wanted to graduate high school, so she gratefully accepted Peter's invitation to help her pass.

She was hesitant to accept his offer, assuming he only wanted to help in an attempt to be closer to the oh so amazing Tony Stark. What was so amazing about him anyway? Oh he's smart and wears metal, BOO HOO-

(Y/N) shook the thoughts dissing her own dad from her head as she jogged up the steps of Peter's apartment complex. Her backpack bounced against her back on every step, not that it was very full.

She had never talked to Peter much, they shared a couple classes and that was it. He was cute and smart but an outcast. She knew Flash bothered him for no reason and that he hung out with that kid- What was his name again? Bob? No, it definitely doesn't start with a b. It was some three letter name, but she couldn't exactly place i-

"No, Ned! She's literally on her way right now! I'm not lying dude! Take a pict-? No, that's so creepy! Don't you dare come over, I'll kill yo-" Peter's voice sounded muffled through the door, but not so muffled (Y/N) couldn't make out what he was saying.

Ned! That was it, she knew it was three letters, that's good enough. Trying to ignore the fact Peter was clearly talking about her, and way too loudly at that, she brought up her hand to ring the doorbell before stepping back.

"Oh my god, I'm hanging up idiot, she's here. Don't come over. Goodbye- Yes, I'll tell you what happens- GOODBYE!"

(Y/N) grinned, leaning over slightly to hide her smile. This guy was adorable.

Said guy opened the door with a nervous grin. "Heyy, you made it, ah, come on in." She nodded, walking past him. He had a nice apartment, real homey.

"Do you- live here alone?" She asked, turning around.

He laughed, not out of humor, more of a filler laugh. "No, I live with my aunt, she's working. Do you think- a fifteen year old could live alone?" He asked, a little concerned.

(Y/N) thought for a good few seconds, "Nah, just wondering. I like this place, it's cute." She smiled back at him, a genuine one. He didn't think she'd be so nice, standing silently in response.

She took the awkward silence as an invitation to continue speaking for him, "So, your room? Or do you want to do it on the couch?"

"Do w- do what?" he whispered, his jaw falling to his feet.

(Y/N) broke into full on hysterical laughing, throwing her head back at his reaction. "Oh my god, Parker! You're hilarious, man." She managed to get out between fits of laughter, slapping him on the shoulder.

He felt the wind get knocked out of him, his jaw still on the floor. "Uhm, the couch- yeah, couch is fine." Man, his voice broke a lot.

-----

"If 7 (y - 3) = 2 (y - 9) + 2y, what's the value of y?" Peter turned to (Y/N), watching her scribble down the equation on her loose piece of paper. She suddenly stopped, staring intently at the numbers on the page.

"Do you want hel-" "No."

Peter leaned back a bit, still looking over her shoulder, as she did nothing.

The numbers danced over the page, blurring into shapes in front of her. God, she hated numbers. Letters too, who the hell decided to put them together and torture children with them? She shook her head before looking at Peter with a sigh. "Yeah, yeah okay I want help." She mumbled, handing him the paper.

He chuckled lightly, "Well uh, I can't answer for you but first you have to simplify each side so it's not as scary, you know? So basically, taking it apart. First you look at 7 (y - 3), what's 7 x 3?"

'God, I hate this, please let someone throw a brick through that window to hit me right on the hea-'

"21. So, then you'd have 7y - 21, right?" She looked at Peter, praying she was right, and he didn't think she was some idiot.

"Yes, exactly!" He grinned, leaning over to write that down on the paper while (Y/N) let out a long sigh of relief. He was a good tutor, she'd have to pay him a good amount, not that it'd be hard. A cute tutor too, even with his weird interpretations of everything she said.

The door opening made both their heads snap in the direction of it, watching a- really pretty woman walk in? "Who's that...?" (Y/N) mumbled, staring at her with no shame.

"My.. aunt- why did you say it like that?" He asked quietly, looking back at the young Stark. "I didn't say it like anything, I was just asking." She retorted, looking back at him. "No, you were like 'Whooo'sss thaaaat?'" He did his best (Y/N) impression, earning a not so impressed look from his student.

She was a little impressed by his sudden confidence in talking to her, she wanted him to talk to her like that all the time, instead of being so nerv- Wait, what was she thinking, that's so weird to even think a-

"You brought home a girl, Peter?" The beautiful woman asked, setting a few groceries down on the counter.

Peter turned slightly red, closing some of the textbooks. "Uhm yeah Aunt May, I thought I told you I was helping a friend with homework." He clenched his jaw, staring wide eyed at his aunt.

"You didn't say it was a girl, a pretty one too." The older woman laughed, opening the fridge to put away some milk.

(Y/N) smiled at that, nudging Peter with her elbow. "I love your aun-" "Dude!" Peter whisper yelled, shoving some textbooks, that weren't even (Y/N)'s into her backpack and zipping it shut quickly.

"But uh- we were finishing up, right (Y/N)?"

The younger Stark sighed and nodded, "Yeah, my dad is texting me crazy anyway." She explained, opening her backpack to take her wallet out.

Peter quickly stood up, "Oh, it's free, I was just helping you out, you know, it wasn't a big deal-"

(Y/N) cut him off, shoving two twenties into his fidgeting hands. "We might not have finished that last problem, but you helped me finish almost every single one on that worksheet Parker. That's more than my dad has helped me with." She whispered the last part with a grin, "I'll see youuuuu.. next weekend? At that burger joint down the street?"

He didn't respond before she said goodbye to Aunt May and walked out the door.

He stared at the door with an open mouth before looking down at the money in his hands. "$40 bucks for a 35 minute tutoring session..?" He mumbled.

"I like her!" Aunt May exclaimed, also looking at the door with her hands on her hips. "You'd be adorable together; you should really shoot your shot Pete."

Peter gasped, gaping at his aunt. "It's not like that, you're so weird May." He dragged his hands down his face, groaning. "Come on, that's (Y/N) Stark! It's definitely like that. She seems really nice too, nicer than her dad seems at least. Also, she totally just asked you out."

"It's to do homework!" Peter defended, picking up the rest of the textbooks on the coffee table.

"And to eat. Which means it's a date."

"I- what?!" Peter gave up, dragging his feet to his room with a very red face.

-----

"What's his name?"

"Peter."

"His full name, (Y/N)."

"Sorry, I didn't ask for his middle name."

Tony sighed, rubbing his forehead. "If he's harmless, why won't you just tell me his name."

(Y/N) kept a straight face, staring down her dad. "Because you'll search him up and stalk him anyway. Like the last two guys I hung out with in the past like five years."

She sat on one of the stools at the counter, swirling a straw in her smoothie.

"What do I have to do to get you to just tell me?" He asked, leaning against the sink on the other side of the kitchen, facing her. She hummed, looking up.

"Tell me what that meeting was about, with the secretary of state." She said, looking back at him.

He groaned, "No, pick something else. I'll buy you 1,000 Honey Buns if I have to."

"Just tell me! It's not like I have anyone to talk to about it if you do, my lips are sealed." She held out her pinkie, leaning over. "You're my daughter, it's impossible for you to shut your mouth."

(Y/N) gasped in offense, dropping her hand onto the marble surface. "Fine, I'll bribe Steve, he tells me everything." She stuck out her tongue before hopping off the stool and leaving the kitchen with a huff.

"You better tell me that kid's name, don't make me look through your phone, young lady!" He yelled after her, before sighing and putting her empty cup in the sink.

a/n: ok its not even much better than the other one but its progress and oh boy this is gonna be a long series at this rate. and i changed the name cause the other one was weird and cringe

#peter parker x reader #marvel x reader #tony stark x daughter reader #peter parker x reader series #avengers x reader #peter parker x fem reader

[tokyogruel]

FINALLY ITS YOUR TURN *desordena todo buscando las que había apartado para ti*

HERE HERE HERE HERE HERE HERE!!! THIS IS FOR YOU!!!! (<- really excited)

THIS SONG WAS MADE FOR YOU!!!! IDK IF IT'S YOUR STYLE BUT ITS SO YOU???? ALSO ALSO ALSO-

Also this one I gift to you (⁠´⁠；⁠ω⁠；⁠｀⁠) it's Aoi Shiori (video w/English subs), and it's a song I hold really close to my heart, but you also give the warmth and gentle and soft feelings this song gives. I know the song is a bit melancholic, but... I don't know, I wanted to give you this song..... AAAAAAND I WANTED TO GIVE YOU ONE IN SPANISH AND I WAS LIKE WHICH WOULD BE GOOD AND I CHOSE THIS ONE (translation)

BECAUSE I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH AND THIS IS A REALLY FUN SONG WITH REALLY GOOD VIBES, SO HERE HERE!!!! TE QUIERO MUCHO MUCHO MUCHO CORAZON DE MELON <3 (literally "melon heart" it's an expression and the closest would be "sweetheart" I guess? I don't really get why melon tho, but it's cute)

seari!!! te queiro mucho mi pajarita!

ahhh you have unlocked my secret,, i enjoy dance music,,, and gumi is a sleeper fav,,, very jammin tune, ill have to listen to it more :3

and youuuuuuuUUUU... you cant just hit me with aoi shiori and expect me to be OKAY,, this shit hurts,, but its so sweet it warms my heart that you thought of me with this song<333

lo mejor de mi vida eres tu... I REALLY LIKE THIS ONE,,.. i am always looking for more songs in my target languages, and spanish is one i dont have a lot for, so im really happy to get a spanish song from you :>

i listened to it once without the translation and recognized a lot more than i thought i would, i feel like i got a general feel for what the song is talking about, but im gonna listen again and check out the translation while i do. AUGGHHH THEM LAUGHING TOGETHER AT THE END KILLS ME DEAD

AGHHHHHHHHHHHAAA OWWWWWW... i read the translation and my heart,,, mi corazonnnn,,,,,.uuhhuhgfuhjhjk THIS HURTS (positive) SEARIIIII MI PAJARITA YOU ARE SUCH A SWEETHEART. CORAZON DE MELON....

of course of course though. i would be remiss if i did not return the favor

this song i think you will enjoy, if you dont know it already. the lyrics arent relevant, i mostly want you to listen to the instruments, so i gave you the off vocal. heres the original if youd like it, and the lyrics if youd like to know them. again though, it is the instrumental that makes me think to show it to you

i think you might enjoy this song. its really jammin, and i personally enjoy the lyrics a lot. i def recommend listening to this one whenever you need a pick-me-up or something to jam out to

ohhhh, oh oh oh seari. have i even shown you my favorite band? im going to see them for the second time in a few months... theyre going to be at a theatre that is super close to my old apartment teehee (i had actually told them about the specific theatre a year+ ago on insta and i think they wrote it down or something. its so crazy)

UM.. blatant fangirling aside. you were perfect & im sorry is the first one that comes to mind for you, with find out the hard way right behind and of course i cant talk about my Darling, Mickey without bringing up reverse cowgirl.....

ahhh ive put so many songs. ive put too many songs. alas, im going to give you one more...

i very specifically want to give you a kiltro song- a band very near and dear to my heart. but of course i cant just give you any kiltro song. so i dug through their discography. a true song dedication, not just a recommendation

ursula - kiltro

#creature speaks #ask tag #mi pajarita seari! mi amiga!!!

[fantasydaydreamers]

SEASON 6 MHA COMMENTS BC I HAVE SOME THINGS TO SAYYYY

(SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT SO IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN ALL OF SEASON 6 YET DNI!!!!)

I WILL PROB DELETE THIS LATER (IDK) BUT IM IN SHAMBLES RN ESPECIALLY AT EPISODES 23 AND 24 !#+'+#{HFJWHXJ

good LORD where do i start?!?!?!

i guess ill just post screenshots of my fav things i saw and go from there????

HELLO????? LMAFAOOOO getting this out of the way first because it caught me off guard and i died lmfaooo

OKAY NEXT IMPORTANT THING>>> DABI'S REVEAL?!?!?!? HEY....SEEING IT ANIMATED WAS D I F F E R E N T. ALSO....HE REALLY DID TALK HIS SHIT??????? like endeavor is an ass and was a shitty father but holy hell touya said fuck all and ruined the todoroki reputation

AND BROADCASTING IT???? hey!!!! he had a story to tell and mf TOLD IT. that shit was WILD

(probably one of my fav screenshots ever bc his expression and the art.....he looks INSANE. i love him)

"you reap what you sow" is such a HARD line. and very true.

touya is THAT bitch. sorry not sorry he talked his shit and said what he had to say...FOR YEARS.

an icon.

OKAY MOVING ON....

I just wanna say that the civilians....villains.... and the corrupt side of being a hero was really winning me over for about half the season. they would say some shit and id be like "....they have a point...." and i think it was inevitable for citizens to start rioting and going rogue. but damn dude....the heroes retiring....THE ONES WHO DIED??? mIDNIGHT?????? MY GIRL!!!! NOO!!!!

hey????? what the fuck is going on????

i do want to make another comment that mirko is also that bitch. her fight scene was badass and she has such unwavering strength to her i was on the edge of my seat tbfh.

OKAY i skipped over this completely (sorry my brain is in shambles) BUT HAWKS?????? HIS HISTORY AND FIGHT WITH DABI??? HIM KILLING TWICE?!?!?!? WHOOOOAAAAAA

hey i love hawks tho, if anything this made me love him more bc of his past and how strong he is??? i wanna kiss him.

FAST FORWARDING TO DEKU'S DRAMATIC ASS LEAVING UA.

i mean....sure i understand his reasoning....but can he practice what he preaches???? he talks all the time about how "we're all going to be heroes...we're all in this together" but leaves every single classmate a personalized note (while explaining how he has one for all) and takes off???? so dramatic for no reason i was like PLS BE SERIOUS!!!!

but i loved the symbolism in his hero costume...the more intense he got and focused on his 1-way thinking, the more he started to look like a villain. THAT was crazy.

NOW. WHEN BAKUGOU FOUND HIM???????

HE REALLY CALLED DEKU OUT TBFH

they both love all might and all might saves people with a smile right?????? DAAAMMMNNNN BAKUGOU REALLY CLOCKED HIM!!!!!!! I SCREAMED WHEN I READ THIS???

my man my man my man-

if anyone here is new to my blog, hello. i love bakugou katsuki. he is my favorite ever and i have deep emotional ties to him since i watched mha when it was first released in 2016. i love him so much and will never be able to stress that enough.

NOW.

WHEN THEY FINALLY CAUGHT DEKU AND BAKUGOU HAD HIS MONOLUGE CONFESSING EVERYTHING TO DEKU AND HOW HE STILL DOESNT FEEL STRONG ENOUGH AND SEES HIMSELF AS WEAK?????? AND APOLOGIZED?!?@E>?4/r HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IM!!!!! NOT!!!!!!! OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!

that was a lot to process and im still not comprehending how he sees himself like that (oh yeah....he has TRAUMA that i feel like UA hasnt taken seriously) class 1a crying too while listening????? literally im jumping off a roof

bc ochacos speech was moving too and the fact that news spread about deku being targeted is crazy and citizens really dont like him....but accepting him back in made my heart warm.

.....BATH TIME!!!!!

kaminari is so right. (hot showers are healing) finally something warm hearted after 24 epsiodes of death and pain and suffering??????

A BATH?>$:R>

ALSO HEY WHEN BAKUGOU STARTED TALKING AGAIN ABOUT RIVALS LMFAOOOOOOOOOOO

KAMINARI AND KIRISHIMA WERE LIKE "....bro...." LMFAOOO I LOVE THEIR FRIENDSHIP YALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

finally to wrap this up i would just like to say that stain is such an interesting character. like....his ideology is different and just so fascinating? i need to watch a character review or something on him bc hes honestly one of the top "villains" in mha aside from shigaraki and dabi (imo)

stain is also for the girls.

the tartarus breakout and the one villain was screaming "GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS-" and stain killed his ass, no hesitation. (id hate to imagine wtf that villain did with girls before to get locked up in tartarus...)

bc stain didnt even kill the guard while retrieving the info chips?? he killed a fellow villain and thats fascinating to me.

okay that concludes this rant. im not okay. season 6 was hell. HIGH SCHOOLERS ARE SAVING JAPAN. 'surpassing all might' should not be a conversation anymore (we're WAYYYY past that)

#my hero academia #mha s6 #boku no hero academia #bnha season six #bnha s6 #my hero academia season 6

[ifyoucandaniel]

Crimson Rivers as Reputation Songs

hi ive decided that taylor wrote reputation for Crimson Rivers and I'm sure you've all had the same thought, but i wanted to write down all the little ways i see them in the album and my interpretation!!!! soe spoilers for CR ahead so be warned! @mayzarbewithyou

…Ready for it?

jegulus!!! 

“In the middle of the night in my dreams / you should see the things we do, baby / In the middle of the night in my dreams / I know I’m gonna be with you / so I take my time” 

very regulus to james !! dirty scandalous man hehe

regulus talking quietly to James when they’re alone and not being watched and he opens up and tells james the things he dreams about for them

I see how this is gon' go / Touch me and you'll never be alone / Island breeze and lights down low / No one has to know

regulus at the beginning of the fic when he was in his parting gift era

"no one has to know"

Obviously the “baby let the games begin” is very Crimson Rivers of her!!

“I see how this is gonna go"

Regulus seeing the ending before it can even begin and never letting himself just want and have until be finally does 

“Knew I was a robber / first time that he saw me / stealing hearts and running off never saying sorry”

WHEN THEY WERE LIKE “ stole your heart, did I?” “Return it to me will you?” “No I think ill hold onto it for a bit more” IDK if that’s word for word but off the top of my head that’s what I remember and ??? That’s so them im???

“Every lover known in comparison is a failure” regulus after exactly one night and thinking Barty wasn’t as good as James LMFAO

End game

This one is also jegulus I’ve decided 

“Big reputation / you and me we got some big reputations / and you heard about me / I got some big enemies / big reputation / you and me we’d be a big conversation”

This is so them before their games!!! Like there isn’t a single person who doesn’t know their names and if they were in love??? They’d be a big conversation indeed

“I don't wanna touch you /  I don’t wanna be / Just anther ex-love you don’t wanna see / I don't wanna miss you  / Like the other girls do / I don't wanna hurt you / I wanna be your end game”

This is so James to reg. Like he wanted him to love him so badddd he just wanted to be reg’s endgame!!! He didn’t want them to be something only to be nothing to him later :(

“Knew her when I was young / Reconnected when we were little bit older / I Did Something Bad”

Them growing up and being in love so close yet so far and then when they’re older falling in love fr this time??? Yeah this is so them

Don’t Blame Me

dorlenes ANTHEM

“For you, I would cross the line / I would waste my time / I would lose my mind / they say she’s gone too far this time / Don’t blame me love made me crazy” 

You’re going to look at me and tell me this ISNT Dorcas meadows starting a WAR to save Marlene ???

“Lord save me my drug is my baby” 

Dorcas literally on her KNEES doing whatever she can to save Marlene oh my god they’re so in love they invented love 

“And baby for you / I would fall from grace / just to touch your face / if you walk away I’ll beg you on my knees to stay”

This is it. This IS their song it belongs to them and them alone I don’t care

Like dorcas went against both riddle and Dumbledore for Marlene. She made her own side and went against the person she’s been fighting for for years for the love of her life

This whole song is just so them!!! I love a woman on a mission <3

Delicate

Lilymary!!!!! Also wolfstar, but lilymary!!!

“This ain't for the best / My reputation's never been worse, so / You must like me for me / Yeah, I want you / We can't make any promises / Now can we, babe? / But you can make me a drink / Is it cool that I said all that? / Is it chill that you're in my head? / ‘Cause I know that it's delicate “

The first part is so remus to Sirius because he met him at his lowest point and still fell in love. they are the definition of love. Look up love in the dictionary and its them

Then lily <3 she was always so afraid of love and what it can do and how It can rip you apart, but she knows what she has with Mary is so so so special and she wants to treat them with so much love and care!! They have a delicate beautiful thing that she’s holding so gently!!

“Just think of the fun things we could do / ‘Cause I like you” 

When lily only wanted a fun time with Mary at first and wasn’t ready for anything else, but then going from that to just “it cool that I said all that? / Is it chill that you're in my head? / ‘Cause I know that it's delicate”

Yeah just them being so lovely and treating what they have with so much love and care 

Also very remus and Sirius learning to trust and tentative touches and gentle kisses and washing dishes together and !!!

Just delicate things

Look What You Made Me Do

this could go either way and a little bit of both between dumbledore and riddle. 

But either way it’s directed at Dorcas. 

Dorcas finding out the things dumbledore has done to ensure he wins this war HE started

“I don’t like your little games / the role you made me play of the fool / no I don’t like you / I don’t like your perfect crime / how you laugh when you lie / you said the gun was mine / isn’t cool / no I don’t like you”

Like we can all agree this is Dorcas @ dumbledore right? Okay cool

“But I got smarter I got harder in the nick of time/ honey I rose up from the dead I do it all the time/ I got a list of names and yours is in red underlined” 

DORCAS MF MEADOWS BABYYYYY she’s so cool wtf I want to be her and be with her I just need her 

“Oh look what you made me do” riddle bc he fucking sucks

But also Dumbledore when he made Gideon and fabion take the fall for dorcas

And dorcas when she started a war because neither side was doing anything so she took things into her own hands. 

Dorcas looking at Dumbledore and saying “look what you made me do” is so powerful!

Dorcas is a badass mf put some respect on her name I want to kiss the back of her hand so bad

Getaway Car

this is one of my favorites off the album and it is very much dumbledore and grindelweld. (unfortunately? idk bc zar did so amazing fleshing or their backstory that its fascinating and i dont like them as people, but their characters are fascinating and the PARALLELS mmmm so good)

“It was the best of times, the worst of crimes / I struck a match and blew your mind / But I didn't mean it, and you didn't see it / The ties were black, the lies were white”

Albus falling in love during the worst time of his life (best of times worst of times)

Grindelweld not seeing albus’ betrayal coming or maybe he did but the lies were white

"X" marks the spot where we fell apart / He poisoned the well, I was lyin' to myself / I knew it from the first Old Fashioned, we were cursed / We never had a shotgun shot in the dark”

He poisoned the well I was lying to myself- albus when grindelweld betrayed him and killed Ariana, he was lying to himself thinking grindelweld  wasn’t the man he was and that he wouldn’t do anything to get him  back

You were drivin' the getaway car / We were flyin', but we'd never get far / Don't pretend it's such a mystery / Think about the place where you first met me / Ridin' in a getaway car / There were sirens in the beat of your heart / Should've known I'd be the first to leave / Think about the place where you first met me

This part belongs to the moment when dumbledore finally kills him. 

Don’t pretend it’s such a mystery, think back to the moment you first met me- they were never going to have a happy ending and grindelweld should have seen it coming, they met during the hunger games where he was putting him and his sister in an arena to fight for their lives. They could never exist like they wanted to. 

“Until I switched to the other side, to the other side / It's no surprise I turned you in / 'Cause us traitors never win”

Albus turning on the man he loved, betraying him and killing him, but never winning. 

“It’s no surprise I turned you in”

Just thinking about dumbledore killing him and saying “don’t pretend it’s such a mystery” as if he would ever do anything less to avenge his sister, even to the man he loved.

Gorgeous

Regulus through and through

This song is literally his internal thoughts about James 24/7 

reg wrote this song about James I know bc he showed me his sad boy poetry and this was in there

“You should take it as a compliment / That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk / You should think about the consequence / Of your magnetic field being a little too strong / you’re so cool it makes me hate you so much”

Liiiiike? Regulus coded. Taylor knows CR reg personally and wrote this for him

Him making fun of James because otherwise hell just talk ab how pretty he is and how in love he is

You're so gorgeous / I can't say anything to your face / ‘Cause look at your face / And I'm so furious / At you for making me feel this way / But, what can I say? / You're gorgeous”

ITS SO REGULUS.

Like come onnnnnn he can’t even look James in the eye most of the time bc every time he does he’s just a deer in the headlights

James is so pretty im in love with him 

Regulus get in line I wanna kiss James face so bad

“You should take it as a compliment / That I'm talking to everyone here but you / And you should think about the consequence / Of you touching my hand in the darkened room / ‘cus you’re so gorgeous it actually hurts”

God this is so regulus idk what more I can say

“Ocean blue eyes looking in mine / I feel like I might sink and drown and die” 

I know James eyes aren’t blue, but the comparison to regulus drowning in them is too good

“You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah / There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have / You are so gorgeous it makes me so mad”

UUUUUUUUGH they’re so lovely im clawing at the wall I want what they have ugh ugh ugh

Dress

this is both wolfstar AND dorlene

“Secret moments in a crowded room / but they don’t know about me and you / there is an indentation in the shape of you / make your mark on me”

This is so CR wolfstar Zar might as well have written the song himself.

Secret moments in a crowded room but they don’t know about me and you??? You’re joking. Like it’s so them😭 Remus at parties as a server while Sirius is siting with sponsors like 3 feet away with hickies he left the night before?? Yeah 

“Say my name and everything just stops / I don’t want you like a best friend / only bought this dress so you could take it off” 

DORLENE DORLENE DORLENE

LITERALLY THEM. When they tried to be friends but Dorcas wanted so much more! Them being in love and being friends never being enough! 

When Marlene asked Dorcas to take her dress off!!! God I love them so much oh my god

“Everyone thinks that they know us / but they know nothing about / all of this silence and patience / pining and anticipation/ my hands are shaking from holding back from you”

WOLFSTAR <3 I love them so much. When the hallows think they have Sirius and Remus all figured out and put in their little boxes, the boy who give out sexual favors for sponsors and the servant to the hallow, but they know nothing about them

When they’re around the hallows and have to hold back from each other but all they want is to be in each other’s arms😭

Also dorlene!!! Again everyone  thinking they know Dorcas and Marlene and they have them in their little boxes, but Marlene would never be the girl they wanted or thought she was and Dorcas was literally undercover for a war. 

The pining and anticipation / my hands are shaking from holding back from you !!!! Dorcas and Marlene!!!! They’re so in love oh my god I love them sm 

“Flashback when you first met me / your buzz cut and my hair bleached / even in my worst times / you could see the best of me / flashback to my mistakes / my rebounds my earthquakes / even in my worst lies / you saw the truth in me”

This is so wolfstar and dorlene. Flashback to my worst times- Sirius knowing Remus saw both his games and has seen him at his worst and Remus thinking about grayback but even then Remus saw the best in Sirius and neither love the other less for their lows

Flashback to my mistakes- Marlene finding out about lily and despite not being together still hurting  because  it hurts! They’re so heartbreaking and I just love them so much

Call It What You Want

THIS IS CR WOLFSTARS SONG I DONT CARE THIS IS IT

“I brought a knife to a gun fight / they took the crown but it’s alright”

Sirius winning his games but never actually winning 

“My baby’s fit like a daydream / walking with his head down / I’m the one he’s walking to / so call it what you want”

Remus walking with his head down bc he’s a servant but he’s always walking to Sirius!

Sirius thinking Remus is so fit all the time and basically drooling nonstop- me too babe, me too

“My baby’s fly like a jet stream  high above the whole thing / loves me like I’m brand new”

Remus never paying attention to rumors and loving Sirius for him and nothing else, loving him like he’s all new and never been tainted by the hallows or the games 

“All my flowers grew back as thorns / he built a fire just to keep me warm / all the drama queens taking swings / all the jokers dressing up as kings / they fade to nothing when I look at him”

Sirius feeling like after the games he only destroyed things and like he grew thorns and ruins everything he touches, but Remus showing him he’s loved??? 

All the hallows trying to get their hands on him and sink their claws in but he only has eyes for Remus (specifically that one scene when Remus is working at the party and all the hallows are throwing themselves at Sirius but as soon as he sees Remus his eyes follow him all night and yeah them)

“ I’m laughing with my lover / making forts under covers / trust him like a brother / yeah you know I did one thing right / starry eyes sparking up my darkest nights” 

It’s literally them. That’s all. It’s them building trust and loving each other and laughing together and being in love.

“I want to wear his initial on a chain ‘round my neck / not because he owns me / but because he really knows me / which is more than they can say”

No you’re not listening. This is literally cr wolfstar 

NOT BECAUSE HE OWNS ME BUT BECAUSE HE REALLY KNOWS ME

Remus is the only person aside from his friends who can say they KNOW Sirius because Sirius let’s him know him. He KNOWS Sirius. All the hallows who want to own Sirius and to make him THEIRS don’t get it. Sirius could never be theirs because they don’t know him and  they never will. Sirius wants to belong to Remus because it’s his choice! He wants to belong to the man he’s built trust with and who KNKWS him. Oh my god they make me SICK. They’re so perfect 

“Would you run away with me?” Sirius to Remus all the time pls pls pls I love them

anyways I have to go do some work so this is all i have but i just love these characters so much and !!!!!

#sirius black #remus lupin #marlene mckinnon #mary mcdonald #james potter #regulus black #dorcas meadowes #lily evans #aberforth dumbledore #ariana dumbledore #albus dumbledore #crimson rivers #jegulus #wolfstar #dorlene #marylily #zeppazariel #marauders #the marauders

[merrycrisis-if]

allie hi omg i’m so late but i finally played the update and I LOVED IT SO MUCH like idek where to start because i played all the routes and they’re all so good. plus the 18+ scenes got me slutting out for real 😭😭

okok listen the added details in qiu’s first flashback literally drove me crazy like “you’re a hard person to catch alone” QIU PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP IM IN LOVE WITH YOU 😭😭😭 and the new flashback!!!!!! like not to make it about me but it reminded me sm of the bday drabble you wrote me last year and let me tell you. a bitch (me) was giggling <3333 the bit where qiu wiped a bit of cheesecake off mc’s lips and mc teased them about making a move to kiss them was so fucking cute :((( and even taking them fishing and the dinner ugh just ALL OF IT!!! they really pulled all the romantic shit and even cut classes for mc and still couldn’t commit to a relationship smh

also nat…… when i say that steamy scene blindsided me and the way they did what they did underwater… i lost my damn mind over that flashback 😮‍💨😮‍💨 but omg that phone call idk what i was expecting but it wasn’t a breakup conversation. when nat said “i need someone who’s here” and “i don’t want scraps when i’ve had all of you” ……. yeah i’m fine 🥲 when mc was like “i wish nat would say smth hurtful so i could hate them” i was like yeah same because nat is so nice and supportive and so spouse material it’s literally impossible not to fall in love with them

but also shay…. god their scenes were fucking insane i was BLUSHING 😭😭😭 there was just no way for me to play different variations of their scenes and stay normal like the little motorcycle bit if you skip the show and they pick you up at dinner was so cute but also the way they make eye contact with you the whole time at their gig…. “tell me why you’re leaving and why it is that we’re kissing on borrowed time” yeah i’m mentally ill. and when they kiss your forehead and your closed eyelids and was like “stop being cute all the time” and the scene in their apartment…. yeah shay’s fucking insane but also very hot but also the biggest sweetheart. i will never be normal after all that

this is so rambly now but i really genuinely enjoyed the demo. i keep saying it but the characters are all lovable even mc’s chaotic and prying relatives which make merry crisis all the more relatable and realistic. i hold this if so close to my heart thank you for writing it 🩷

AHHH!!!! Nikka you have no idea how excited I was to see this in my inbox, and the smile on my face just kept growing and growing as I read this message. It's been a while! I hope 2023 has been kind to you!

I loved writing that update, and I hold Merry Crisis very dear to my heart as well—so it always just hits me in the feels when people like it too/relate to it, ya know!

The Qiu flashback was 1000% inspired by the drabble I wrote for you last year, and I'm so glad I got to use it and expand on it in the game!! I am soooo happy that you liked the scenes, especially because I consider you a Qiu-authority at this point! And on Qiu doing literally everything except commit to a relationship.... yes. Exactly. I think this is what MC also cannot. believe.

Ahh omg. Heh. The Nat spicy scene at the beach was definitely... quite something to write. I wanted the call to really hit hard, but also offer some opportunity for redemption/hope (I wonder if you managed to get the scenes where MC does get a 'maybe' from Nat!)

Yeah, this last update was definitely one for the Shay fans—I packed in as much as I could in there, and writing the music/performance scene was fun, but so were the... bedroom / pillow talk scenes... especially for same-sex Shay!

Anyway, this message made me so so happy, so thank you so much for sending it. (It also makes me happy to know that the side characters / MC's family are also welcome and not simply an annoyance.)

Sending you a million hugs and all of my love!!

#merry crisis #asks #IF #interactive fiction #best ask ever #:') #you're the best #shay #qiu #nat