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keorami · 3 years

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So you know when you wanna write a funny situation but you realise that you have to come up with said funny situation? Yeah... I forgot that my sense of humor is atrocious, but at least I tried...? I couldn't focus on one long story so I decided to write several short ones instead! Hope you enjoy!

"I have the feeling you're not enjoying this sleepover very much."

Dream did not, in fact, enjoy this 'sleepover', because not only did it remind him that his only way out of this hell was stuck in here with him, but said way out had been nothing but insufferable since he got here.

"Is this about the bell-"

"You could have gotten us out of here."

Oh yeah, said way out also wasted their one chance at escaping on a fucking bell. Dream hadn't felt such anger in... he doesn't remember actually. He didn't get to feel angry often in here.

"Listen, it was a very important matter-"

He stopped listening at that point. It was the same tirade every time about clout and viewership and whatever that he honestly could care less about. Staring at and counting the cracks in the obsidian seems like a very interesting activity.

"Hey, are you listening?"

1... 2... 3...

"Dude."

4... 5... 6...

"How long are you gonna ignore me?"

7... 8- wait, didn't he count that one already?

"Look at me at least."

No, he doesn't think he will. Because then the bell will be within view, and Dream knows that if he wasn't so pathetically weak, either the bell or Techno would have been thrown into the lava by now. But he is, so he'll throw the next best thing: his body. And fuck whatever the pig might have to say about it.

"Dreeeeeam-"

"WHAT."

He whipped his head so fast his neck hurt a little. He was fully prepared to... well now he doesn't remember, because of all faces he expected Techno to make...

The fuckboy face wasn't one of them.

"Nooo don't be angry, you're so sexy haha."

Oh God, he just died and went to limbo didn't he?

He wasn't sure when exactly he collapsed on the floor, gasping for air in a mix of wheezes and coughing, but Techno was now hovering over him in panic.

"Dream please don't die, I don't want the last thing you ever saw to have been that face-"

Oh, if there was one thing he would make sure not to forget, it would have been that face.

~~~~~

"Man, I'm starving. When do we get food in here again?"

"Um, I don't know really. I guess whenever Sam is in the mood?"

"What."

"Yeah."

Sam hasn't dropped food a single time since he was locked in here. Well, add 'food' to the basic human rights Dream isn't getting. They're really treating this like a bucket list aren't they?

"It's... You'll get used to it."

Dream gives him some potatoes from his inventory, to Techno's absolute delight. At least Sam has great taste, he'll give him that. But...

"...They're raw."

"Well, obviously."

Listen. He loves potatoes. He'd say he loves them to death, if he could die. No matter how you cook them, they turn out delicious. But raw? He'd only eat them raw if it was a life-or-death situation AND he somehow had no source of heat at his disposal, and the likelihood of that situation happening is practically zero. So yeah, he doesn't like to eat them raw.

"And that's all you get?"

"If you can't eat it-"

Ah, those famous words. Now, he's fairly certain that Dream didn't mean it as a challenge, but at this point Techno is just too competitive to see it any other way. Look, you don't get to his level by being passive, okay? So it's perfectly reasonable.

What wasn't reasonable was the taste of this potato because what in the Blood God's name is this.

"What the hell is this."

"...A potato?"

"No, this is a fucking travesty."

And what a sight it was, the Technoblade swearing and ranting about potatoes, of all things. Dream could only last until "mossy cobblestone tastes better than this dry ass, stinky ass garbage" before he lost it. You gotta give him credit for lasting this long at least. Technoblade was too busy ranting to care either way.

~~~~~

This can't be happening.

"Dream."

"What."

He tries to sound neutral, but Techno can hear the snicker in his voice.

"You don't have to do this."

Surely he can reconsider-

"On the contrary, it has to be done."

Dream places a single card on the pile, which happens to be his last one. A Wild Draw 4, to rub salt into the wound. Techno decides that ending on that card should be illegal.

"Remember the deal. No bell for the rest of the day."

"NOOOOOOO!"

Unfortunately, that had been the condition he had to agree to in order to get Dream to play. Because apparently he was "ringing it all the fucking time and it was driving me crazy". There's that, and the threat that Dream would jump in the lava again if he refused. So clearly he had a choice in the matter.

He knew that there was a chance he could lose... but he had deemed it low enough to ignore it. How could he not expect the resident chessmaster of the SMP to utterly trounce him in UNO? He was a fool, and now he has to think about how to make up for the lost clout and money.

At least, judging from the quiet snickers, someone finds his misery funny. He finds consolation in knowing that he may have lost the battle but he won the war. In a way.

~~~~~

"So I almost got mauled to death but that was how I met Steve."

Dream stares at him the way Phil does when he does something particularly outlandish and he fails to see why.

"Can I ask a question."

"Sure."

"Why would the first thing you do upon running into a starving polar bear be hugging it?"

Of course he would question it, because obviously Techno's superior intellect is confusing to the common mind. He just really likes animals, okay? Steve's fur looked so soft and fluffy he just had to touch it, he almost got his face torn off and Phil never let him live that down. But he'll sooner accept governments than let Dream know that. He doesn't want to embarrass himself too much.

"See Dream, I live by a simple philosophy."

"Long live anarchy?"

"No. Well yes, but not just that."

Dramatic silence.

"Any animal is huggable if you aren't a coward."

Dream chokes on his potato, the only one he had eaten today, and Techno worries for a second before he realises that Dream is actually laughing.

"Tech- what-" His body is shaking. "-what is wrong with you??"

"It all started when I was born-"

~~~~~

And it's enough to send Dream rolling on the ground. It wasn't even that funny, but he supposes that prison does a number on you, and Dream's sense of humor was already terrible to begin with.

...Okay, now he had to make sure that the teletubby didn't laugh himself to death.

At the end of the day- at least Techno assumes it's the end of the day, he doesn't know how trustworthy his internal clock is anymore- the two inmates of Pandora's Vault are about ready to fall asleep, but Techno has one last thing to do before that.

"Dream, come here for a minute."

Said man gives him such a wary look that he almost feels insulted.

"...Why?"

"I won't bite, ya know."

"That's... debatable."

Bruh.

"Just get over here."

And Dream complies without any further complaints. Techno hopes he didn't sound too harsh, but his cellmate wasn't shivering uncontrollably, so he thinks he's in the clear.

"What?"

Techno lays his cape down on the very uncomfortable obsidian floor. Seriously, laying down for an hour is enough to make his joints ache. 0/10 would not recommend. How did Dream- right, he doesn't have a choice.

"What are you doing?"

"Making this prison less of a living hell. Come lay down."

"...I'm fine."

Why are you being so difficult, Techno wants to ask, even though he can guess the answer. When was the last time anyone did something remotely nice for him without any catch? Especially in here?

"Stop being difficult and sleep with me already."

Silence.

"...Pft."

"You know what I meant."

In his defense, everyone has their moments, and his usually don't happen that often.

"Stop being so difficult and-"

"Just... get over here. My cape is really soft."

"Is that why you wear it all the time?"

"...Among other things."

But mostly because it was really soft.

Dream still seemed apprehensive about the whole thing, and while usually Techno would have respected his wishes and left him be... the sight of his rival curling up in a corner of the cell, obviously trying to not aggravate his injuries as he did, was saddening even to him. Prime, he's really not good at this... but Dream probably definitely needs it.

So he pulls his roommate into a side hug, which is honestly the best he can manage without ruining his image. It's awkward, Dream is way too stiff, and maybe now would be the time to say something before embarrassment kills either or both of them. Something reassuring, comforting to help Dream relax in his presence for example.

"This is gonna be the best sleepover you've ever had."

...But the day he stops relying on humor for any kind of social interaction is the day it'll either stop working or get him killed.

"...This is so stupid."

And today was not that day.

Dream lets out a laugh, shaky but genuine, and relaxes. Techno sees that as a win. Since he's stuck here for a while, might as well make his favorite teletubby's life in here more bearable.

And it's finally over! It only took me... *looks at calendar* ...time is an illusion. Idk if I'm really happy with this, but on the bright side, it's... done? Now I really wanna continue that endersmile fanfic as I got some ideas, hopefully it won't take as long? God I am a writing disaster

Also if you saw any mistakes... no you didn't :)

#dreblr #technoblr #rivalsblr #rivals duo #keo's writing #techno angrily ranting about potatoes is hilarious to me #i hc him as being very passionate about them #so he takes them very seriously #look everyone portrays c!techno as this calm and collected warrior #he farmed potatoes for 14 hours straight he definitely has dumbass energy #tfw you don't know how to be funny

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forestwater87 · 3 years

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Hey! It's the one who wanted fanfiction writing advice and how to sorta join the fandom. So, I am currently writing a werewolf! au for Gwenvid, and I was wondering if I could ask you something (well, multiple somethings lol)? One, what are things you would like to see in a Gwenvid fic? Two, do you have any advice for writing a good first chapter? Mine is kind of short and not too good, but yours are super good. Three, how would Gwen react to becoming a werewolf? Scared or excited? Thanks!

Oooh, fun! I don’t know if I’m the best authority on this, but I think I have a couple followers who might also have some good insights. Let’s see . . .

Things I personally go feral for in Gwenvid fics:

That UST. Pining, longing, yearning -- whatever you wanna call it, all those little glances at each other then looking away when they get caught staring, getting distracted by a brush of skin against theirs or the other one looking amazing just out of nowhere, standing too close without realizing it and then awkwardly coughing and backing away . . . all of it. These two goobers in love with each other and completely oblivious is just . . . idk, it’s obviously personal preference, but that will-they-won’t-they dance is one of my favorite things about pre-established-relationship Gwenvid, and something I never get tired of. (Also, just saying: werewolf transformations have the distinct side effect of the werewolf waking up partially or completely naked in the forest. It’s a scenario ripe for awkward and/or hilarious situations.)

If they’re in an established relationship already, it’s all about those little domestic things. I mean, there can be domestic things even before they’re dating, because they live together for like 3-4 months out of the year so they have a routine going, but things like one of them keeping the light on for the other without thinking, making coffee/tea and leaving everything laid out just the way the other one likes it, communicating (or even arguing) with just a look, all the casual lil touches of two people so comfortable with each other that it’s automatic at this point. It’s an essential part of fluff that I sometimes feel is overlooked in favor of more dramatic hurt/comfort (which is also excellent, to be clear).

BANTER! It’s not so much a canon thing as a fanon one, but the artist formerly known as Ciphernetics basically established flirty teasing and back-and-forth as a staple of Gwenvid’s charm in their earth-shatteringly beautiful fanfiction (that I can’t link because tumblr softblocks posts with links, but if you look at my blog for like 10 seconds you’ll be able to figure out what I’m talking about), and I think everyone’s writing, including my own, needs more banter. They’re so different, after all; why not have them butt heads in a fun way?

Please please please don’t do NSFW if you’re uncomfortable with it, but there is nowhere near enough of it in Gwenvid-land. Just because we’re wholesome doesn’t mean we can’t also be kinky! (Oh man, I just realized I have no idea how old you are. Uhhhh if you’re not an adult just skip this one on by! Or if you are an adult and this ain’t it. It’s like it wasn’t ever here! Poof! I should probably just delete this, but maybe it’ll awaken a spark of inspiration in someone. Lord knows I haven’t been driving the smut train for a while, so I’m just hoping someone else will do my job for me. Plus Gwen would want me to include this suggestion, especially if there are werewolves involved.)

You know, there’s not a lot of action-hero Gwenvid out there, is there? Most of it’s relationship melodrama and domestic fluff, which I love -- obviously, I write it literally all the time -- but with a werewolf AU you have the opportunity for gratuitous violence, and both David and Gwen have proven they can kick a whole lot of ass and deal out (or take) a lot of pain. If you need two people fighting monsters -- or fighting as monsters -- you could do a lot worse than those two. It’d be a fun change of pace that’d work well with their character dynamic.

Writing a first chapter:

I don’t have a ton of advice here that isn’t pretty common, but the biggest thing is to start in the middle of action. This can range in terms of drama: a camp activity going horribly wrong, a nightmare, maybe even David discovering Gwen’s a werewolf. Your story doesn’t have to go in chronological order, after all, so if you have to backtrack in later scenes or chapters that’s not a bad thing in the slightest!

It’s much better to start with a really exciting, gripping situation and then backfill in the information that matters than starting off with all that boring worldbuilding and exposition. Don’t get me wrong, that worldbuilding and exposition are necessary, but they’re also like . . . I dunno, salt. It’s essential to the recipe, but no one would say it’s their favorite part of a meal, and having to eat a whole pile of it before they get to the good stuff wouldn’t be enjoyable at all. It’s better sprinkled throughout to add flavor to your story as needed.

I like that metaphor! It’s kinda cliche, but I think it still gets the job done.

So yeah, start with something exciting and know it’s okay for your readers to go, “wait, what the fuck’s going on?” That’s kind of a great thing, actually; it establishes mystery and introduces higher stakes, and just gets your readers going. It’s also more fun to write, which is good! (For example, I just read a really great book call The Chill, which opened with a woman tying a bag over her head, weighting herself down with chains, and throwing herself into a river to “join the work.” Who is this person? What work? Did she know she was going to die -- it definitely doesn’t feel like a suicide, but what else did she think was going to happen?? I’m instantly on board, even if the next few scenes were focused on establishing exposition and actually kinda boring. It’s all about that hook.)

To be fair: I don’t do this all that often in my own fics. For every “starting the story with a botched assassination attempt,” we have “starting the story with waking up.” It’s important to have a first chapter that matches and sets the tone of your story; if it’s going to be a rip-roaring action/horror adventure, you’re going to want to start things off with all that stuff I mentioned before. If you’re writing cute fluff, there’s nothing wrong with your in media res chapter opening being an adorable fluffy scene. Compelling doesn’t have to mean scary or action-packed, but more serve as a teaser for what the rest of the story is going to bring. I’ve been leaning on action or thriller stuff because a werewolf AU implies some level of creature-feature monster spookiness, but any tone works as the start of a fic, as long as it’s not “here’s a laundry list of the universe’s rules,” because that’s boring and you can weave that into the rest of your story later.

As for your other comment, short isn’t bad at all; in fact, if you want to make your first chapter a really short, compelling scene, that can be a great way to draw people in. But I also am a proponent of writing until it’s done, and couldn’t stick to a page or word count to save my life. My chapters are all over the place, and sometimes I’ll randomly chop them up if I feel like it’s going too long but usually I don’t bother. The more you write, the more you develop a feel for when the story, chapter, or scene needs to end, but as you’re starting out you might wanna snag a beta to help you find that stopping place.

Wow, this is long! Awkward! Sorry about that! I’ll make this last one short:

Gwen the werewolf:

I can’t imagine any universe in which she isn’t psyched as hell. I think she desperately wants to be more special and important than she is, and having a sexy monster superpower would only be a good thing to her, regardless of whatever its drawbacks may be. She might get tired of certain aspects of being a werewolf as the honeymoon phase wears off, but in the beginning I think she’d be excited and maybe even relieved.

Anyway, I hope that helps! It’s a lot of rambling, but I imagine you’re used to that by now. :)

#ask forest #campcamp #gwenvid #yeah i'm putting this in the main tags even though it's long as balls #fight me #cc gwen #campcampfanfan

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vampirequeenoffan · 4 years

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Intrusive

IDK, just a DP drabble that seized me by the hands and forced me to write it. I haven’t re-read or edited lmao so it’s probably Real Bad but I have other shit to be doing so imma just dump it here, sorry to yalls eyeballs

Tucker pokes him in the shoulder.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

Danny groans. He’s got his arm slung over his eyes and he’s upside-down on the couch; legs hooked over the back and back pressed into the cushions. It’s not exactly the world’s most comfortable position, but if he eases off the gravity a little it doesn’t actually hurt. Besides, the discomfort is grounding, pulling his brain away from itself and back into the physical world.

“Ghost bullshit,” he grunts at Tucker. He doesn’t bother uncovering his eyes. He doesn’t really even need to, not the way he is right now, with Tucker picked out so neon in his mind that he can almost taste his presence. He doesn’t use his eyes to “see” when his friend sits down beside him, leaning his elbow on the back of the couch and drawing his legs up off the floor.

“That sucks,” Tucker says.

“Tell me about it.”

“Do you wanna?” he asks. “Tell me, I mean. Get it out of your brain.”

Danny contemplates that for a moment, falling so still he nearly forgets to breathe. Then his lungs start complaining, reminding him that he is very much still in human mode, thanks, and that he does need air for more than just vibrating his vocal chords.

Danny sighs.

“Urges,” he says. One-word response.

He still can’t see Tucker, but he can “see” him nod. He’s such a pleasantly warm shade in Danny’s mind right now, a color he can’t describe because humans can’t perceive it. Danny could look at it forever.

“One of the fighting ones again?” Tucker asks. Danny shakes his head.

“I wanna put you in a box.”

It’s a testament to their relationship that Tucker doesn’t freak out about that sentence and all that it could imply. Instead he just pauses, purses his lips in the way that Danny can only vaguely “see” (a slight variation in his color, dipping almost orange on the spectrum), and drums his fingers against the back of the couch.

“Like. . . a coffin?” he asks, tone casual. More casual than it probably should be for the subject matter.

“Not really,” Danny says. “I mean, it’s not not a coffin either, but it isn’t specifically one. My brain just. . . really wants you and Sam to be tucked away somewhere safe where no one else can touch you and I can guard you forever. And ever.”

He pauses.

“And ever.”

Tucker nods, the motion burning brightly in Danny’s mind.

“Creepy,” he comments.

Danny groans again.

“I hate my brain.”

“So do I, you’re not special,” Sam calls from the other room. Danny’s itching under his skin with the urge to go grab her, despite how the walls in between them don’t dampen the “sight” of her in his mind. He presses his arm a little harder down over his eyes, as if that could block out her luminous smear across his consciousness.

“We’re having a private conversation,” Tucker yells back at her. “Me and Danny are bonding. Get your self-depreciation out of here!”

“Then stop talking so loudly, idiots!” Sam says. She’s crouched on the ground, rifling through what Danny knows is a box despite neither seeing nor “seeing” it. It shouldn’t take her that much longer to find Dead Teacher iii, and then she’ll be back in the room. Danny has to keep repeating that to himself.

Tucker reaches down and pokes his shoulder again.

“It’s really bugging you, huh,” he says. “That she’s in the other room.”

“How can you tell?” Danny asks. He hasn’t moved, hasn’t acted on any of his instincts. For all intents and purposes Tucker should just see a normal teenager lying sprawled out next to him, albeit in a somewhat awkward position.

Tucker shrugs. His shoulders bleed color behind them in an echo of the movement.

“Your teeth. They’re always pretty sharp, but right now they look like you could bite your own lip off. You’re not kissing anyone for a while, by the way,” he adds.

Danny’s groan borders on a whine this time.

“My ghost half is ruining my life,” he complains.

Tucker snorts and pokes him again, this time on the cheek. The warmth of his skin, of his presence in Danny’s mind, make Danny shiver. He wants so badly to bundle Tucker up in his arms and never let go.

“Is it just us right now?” Tucker asks. “Do you wanna box up anyone else?”

Danny hesitates, turning that thought over in his head.

“. . .no,” he ultimately concludes, “Not really. My brain’s got my house categorized as safe and mine and that’s where my family is right now, so they’re fine. And Val– well. Val is Val. I’ve always got conflicting feelings there.”

“It would be nice if those cancelled out, huh,” Tucker muses. Danny’s complained about this to him before. Fight and Protect fluctuate in his mind from moment to moment when it comes to Valerie and The Red Huntress, and the overlap when they’re both at their strongest can nearly give Danny a migraine. In the same way he can have a panic attack while in the middle of a depressive episode, he can very much want to swaddle Val in bubble wrap while also wanting to stab her.

“Well,” Sam says, straightening up and starting to (yes!) return to the room, “We can’t do a box, but we were already going to cuddle pile on the couch.”

“I still can’t get over you saying cuddle,” Tucker says.

“There’s nothing more hardcore than cuddling,” Sam huffs as she flops down on Danny’s other side. Her arm swings as she makes to throw what Danny assumes is the DVD box at Tucker, and Danny’s hands shoot up to snag it out of the air before it can strike his friend.

There’s a moment of silence. Danny opens his eyes. It’s weird seeing the world around him and “seeing” on top of it, part of why he’d covered his face in the first place. His brain just isn’t meant to process that much visual information at once, the same way his brain isn’t actually wired to “see.” He tries to focus on what’s real, on the actual light bouncing off his friends and into his retinas, and blinks away the glowing smear that isn’t even on the visual spectrum. He’s holding Dead Teacher iii in his hands, and he stares at the cheesy cover art with the single-minded focus of a guy recalibrating his eyes.

“Ah,” Sam says. “That bad, huh?”

Danny lets go of the DVD and it lands on his face. It hurts, but not that much.

Tucker sighs and grabs the case, standing up and moving to pop the DVD into the player. Danny, with a herculean effort, manages to not grab his ankle on the way by and drag him bodily back onto the couch.

Sam stretches, her long pale fingers tangling together overhead, physical form barely more present in Danny’s mind than the glow of her presence. Then she drops her hands and lays down, plopping her head onto his stomach and peering up into his very-close face. Danny can pick out every sun-starved freckle-that-could on her face, inherited from her parents and dampened by lifestyle choices. In the summer, when even the extra-strength sunscreen Sam slathers on can’t fight back her love for the outdoors, those freckles darken and bloom like constellations in the night sky.

The weight of her head against his stomach smooths some of Danny’s anxiety. She’s here. She’s real. She’s alive. She’s safe. She’s his.

She isn’t, of course. Tucker isn’t either. No one, on this planet or off of it, belongs to anyone, least of all Danny. And Danny knows this, believes it with the same certainty and maybe even the same part of his brain that knows that the earth goes around the sun, but that doesn’t get rid of his ghost-lizard brain chattering away in the back of his consciousness.

There’s the hum of the DVD player starting to spin the disk, then the previews begin behind Danny’s head. Tucker sits back down and, with Sam taking up the real estate on Danny’s abdomen, hooks an arm under one of the legs thrown over the back of the couch. He drags Danny’s limb closer and starts using it like a headrest, cheek pressing against Danny’s shin.

“You guys–” Danny’s voice breaks off. Finally, the anxiety that’s been buzzing at the back of his mind for the past hour and a half is tapering off, soothed by his proximity and contact with those he wants to protect. It’s such a relief that Danny could almost cry. But. . .

“You guys don’t have to be that close if you don’t want,” he says. Because it’s true. Sam and Tucker are under no obligation to play along with his ghost brain, no obligation to surrender to whatever weird instincts Danny has jammed into his consciousness. Danny has no right to ask them to, and he doesn’t. Not ever. They can make their own choices, and he refuses to become the kind of monster who would try to take their free will from them. They’re his friends, not his property, and he’s never going to forget that.

“Danny,” Sam says, “Shut up. The movie’s starting.”

“Yeah, man,” Tucker chimes in, “We were gonna do this anyway. Let us know when your brain’s calmed down enough to be upright, okay? I want popcorn later and there’s no way we’re gonna be able to integrate a bowl into this mess.”

Danny kicks his foot lightly, jostling his leg in Tucker’s hold and bumping his head, but he’s smiling. His friends are here. They’re alive. They’re watching a dumb movie from a dumb series they love and hate in equal measure.

And Danny’s happy.

#Danny Phantom #Danny Fenton #Tucker Foley #Sam Manson #Eternal Trio #kinda #I use the term friend a bunch but there's also the implication that They All Be Smoochin #sooooo #Posessive behavior #intrusive thoughts #Ghost Bullshit functioning like anxiety #IDK this is probably super poorly written and I might delete it later but #whatever!

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gayasianminimalist · 4 years

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Dear Future Deanna,

You are about to go off to college, and afterwards starting your great big life. Therefore you may never see this message future Deanna. But I won’t lose hope because maybe you’ll have this with you without knowing it. Anyways, good luck in college, hope you make the most of it because you only get once chance in college. Make good choices, but at the same time take some risks or else you will forever regret not being bold. It’s okay if you make any mistakes because I’m sure you’ll learn from them and become better. And another thing future Deanna, live in the moment and don’t think too far ahead.

-Deanna Wong June 1, 2015

Dear past Deanna,

Well 2 years later I managed to find this mini notebook and see what I wrote to myself awhile back. Past Deanna, I have certainly made some mistakes and done things I couldn’t imagine myself doing 2 years ago! I have met some of the most important people in my life these past couple years, especially this past school year. I hit the gym pretty often which is a very necessary thing in my life but I don’t exactly have access to a gym at the moment. I’ll make do this summer with @ home exercises and probably running in the mornings hopefully starting tomorrow. I kind of hit a big wall at the end of my 1st year at UCSD, I failed 2 classes and passed with a B and I’m waiting to take the other class still. My gpa definitely tanked but now I have above a 3.0 again which is my goal gpa to maintain for the rest of my years here. I see my handwriting hasn’t changed too much so I’ve reached my max as far as writing legibility. I’m cleaning out my desk right now and there are definitely a lot of old Deanna history hidden in these drawings. Hmm so I’ve left my college journal at school, but I only wrote in it probably twice this whole school year. Way to keep record of what’s happening. So something that has definitely changed my life was starting my rave life. EDM really has had an impact on me and I decided to give ecstasy a go. It is quite the euphoria, but in great moderation. Gave me the happiest feeling in the world. I’m so glad my friends have been gracious enough to let me have this experience. So I’m not saying drugs are good, but they’re sure really fun. This past spring quarter I tried shrooms and that trip definitely gave me one of the weirdest days of my life. Everything just felt sort of off, but I saw everything a bit differently visually. And then more often than not I had those nights of being drunk, stoned, or crossed af. Like I knocked out pretty hard on some nights. Next year I definitely need some self control over these type of nights. IDK if my body can handle such tough treatment anymore. Anyways I joined a frat, and now I have 2 littles in my frat. They’re super cool but I need to find a way to connect all of us next year because they’re kinda polar opposites. I don’t wanna think about this too hard though so I’ll just continue on this much needed spheal. Also an update on my love life: non-existent. I’ve been single for a solid 20 years since I’ve been alive. Also I’m 20 what... how dis happen. Going off on a tangent, I think I have found that photos are very important to me. All the memories I have captured, I can’t even begin with how blessed I feel forever with such great memories. I would say my second year of college was definitely better than my first year. I wanna stop here past Deanna since I’ve given you the gist of my college thus far. Now to write to future Deanna again.

-Deanna Wong July 12, 2017

Dear Future Deanna,

So what past Deanna said, keep living in the moment, take lots of pictures, and make more new friends, but remember to keep your old ones. Maybe try dating someone before the end of college, or not but you need a person in your life I think, or maybe I’m wrong and it’s better that you’re independent all through college. Whatever happens, happens. Also keep living your healthy life, go gym, hike, eat right, and so on. And don’t feel so bad on not so good days, stress eating gets to everyone. Try to say no to people, you can’t be influenced all the time. Otherwise you’ll never learn to have things your way. You can be helpful to people too, but sometimes you should make sure you get your own shit together first. I think you have all the tools needed to succeed in the rest of college and life, so make your choices wisely.

-Deanna Wong July 13, 2017

Dear past Deanna,

I think I’ve gotten college life down, better than my first 2 years for sure. I still am making mistakes though, kind of had some bad incidents as far as my behavior record with UCSD, but on my way to fixing that. Nothing that’ll put me on hold for graduating, I just have to deal with business and this should all be over next quarter. Long story short I passed out at an on campus event and I have some consequences to deal with but it’s all on me, I have to fix things. On the bright side, everything in my academics are right again. Above a 3.0 and I am on track to graduate by next spring. It’s really hard to write into this tiny notebook. I’m writing very intensely I’m sweating a little. It’s also not the coolest temperature. Sacramento brings the heat. In terms of my social/party life, this past year of college, and within the last quarter, has exceeded my first 2 years. Well part of the reason has been because I turned 21 this year. Legal drinking is a whole new game. You would think I can control myself at this point, but I still can’t some nights. I’ve definitely opted out of drinking a lot more this year. Self-control is getting better. A lot of seniors I grew close to this year are graduated now. It makes me really sad but I need to learn to get through this year without them. They are all going on their own paths for the future, and I wish them all the best and to visit me next year! My love life got a little bit spicier this year, but nothing drastic happened where I need to announce it. Still no girlfriend and I really want to have one more and more. Still actively using dating apps. Well just more recently since its summer now and I don’t have much else to do. Just trying to recharge myself mentally. I think a lot of things that happened this year has given me a bit of a mental drain. I think i actually like attention but I may have gotten more than I need for a year. My 21st birthday is the most extra day I’ve had in my life. Everything was funny, everyone was dressed up, and there were a lot of gifts. The best thing was all my friends being there just to celebrate my friend Nat and I turning on year older. Like it shouldn’t be that huge of a deal, but it became a big deal just because we wanted it to be. This really should be more of advice for future me like the 2 past me’s, so I’m gonna do that instead of blabbing about my life. i’m supposed to do that somewhere else. Alright it’s there, peace past me.

-Deanna Wong July 5, 2018

Dear Future Deanna,

Not sure what to say. Well if past Deanna has been able to accomplish all she has up to now, future Deanna can keep up this level of excelling life plus more. You’re literally about to enter the actual adult world after this year. You need to figure out your plan even if you don’t want to. You gotta make moves to get where you want. Such as staying home or moving out as soon as possible. Get a woman, it’s time to be more proactive about your love life because if you don’t make moves, no one’s gonna do it for you. Maybe tell people how you actually feel if you feel for them. Still have to take risks. I don’t think past Deanna has taken any REAL risks. Like a risk that makes you sweat and super anxious beforehand but could be very worth it. But you’ve always had a logical side, so maybe listen to it if it’ll make your life better in the long run. I’ll continue later but I have to eat first. You are your own grown ass adult now, speak up for what you want. You can’t let other people dictate your outcome of situations. Take control of you situation. Take control of your situation. Be a good friend. You’ve gotten better at it by leaps and bounds, but there’s always room for self-improvement. Be appreciative of how far you’ve come. Don’t beat yourself too much, you still tend to do this from time to time. Take your own advices? I don’t think you’ve had to apply this yet, but you could try giving yourself a few pointers. Keep yourself tidy. Clean your room more often when you’re at school. Things pile up, and a cleaner space tends to give you a clearer mind. Keep in touch with those you don’t see as often. You tend to spend all your time with one group of people instead of reaching out more. This is why you don’t see some people enough. Develop this skill now and it’ll translate in the future. I think I’ll keep it to this for now, you’ll gain more wisdom as you endeavor into your final months at UCSD. Stay lit, stay safe, and be you. :)

-Deanna Wong 7/30/18

This is just some back and forth between myself that I had for the first 3 years of my college life. I’ll save my last year for another post. I feel like between each year I had some improvements, but a lot of the stupid stuff I did more or less are from all my non-sober nights in college. It’s kind of the same thing over and over but just with different people and different circumstances. Looking back at everything now, I’ve really become a lot more of a stable person. I don’t regret a single moment of undergrad. Although I find it really strange I felt like I needed to have a girlfriend at some point. I honestly with so occupied with my own life that I really did not need to add someone else to the equation. And even now I’m still kind of ok with my independence, maybe a bit too ok with my independence. I think honestly the right person will just come at the right time. I really think I need to give the meeting someone in the real world a shot. Well not now since California is in a lockdown but after this pans over I’ll try to go out there and find the love of my life.

Stay safe out there y’all and don’t go spreading too many germs. I’m out gonna be raving in my house haha.

4 notes · View notes

fillianore-moved · 5 years

Text

this is just a very long and unfortunate list of incorrect quotes i’ve compiled for the fe3h squad + my oc (aka cassia montal, who’s the assistant teacher at the monastery and is romancing jeritza)! i just needed a way to develop her and all the relationships there more, and this is the result, so it’s completely self-indulgent, lazy and frankly pretty silly, but still i had fun and developed her and her relationships a lot during this process! @highoverseer and @koroleyva i’m tagging you two because idk anyone else who’d care at all for this flaming pile of trash packed into a fe3h package uwu 🌷🌼🌸

-------------

byleth: how long have you been sleeping with cassia?

jeritza: that’s disgusting. and wrong. i don’t even get… why would... i…i’ve never had sex with anyone, anywhere. it’s none of your… you have… the nerve, the audacity… cassia is my colleague, technically. and she is terrible, face-wise. and how… how... do i know, frankly, that you’re not sleeping with her? maybe you are. maybe you’re trying to throw me off? hmm? check and mate.

------------

cassia dies.

annette is sobbing

dimitri is heartbroken

edelgard is trying to do a satanic ritual with hubert to bring her back

claude is stapling memes to her coffin

-----------

byleth: you dropped your dyn- dy- dyna… mite…

byleth: uh… what else have you got in there?

cassia: oh… gunpowder, nitroglycerin, notepads, fuses, wicks, glue, and… paperclips. big ones.

cassia: uou know. just office supplies.

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cassia to annette: when you turn 18, people are gonna try and tell you to buy drugs or cigarettes because you can. no. you know what else is legal to buy at 18? blades. get yourself a damn sword. a big knife is also okay.

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cassia: we both look very beautiful tonight.

jeritza: you know, if you- if you’d just said I look beautiful, I would’ve said “so do you”.

cassia: i couldn’t take that chance.

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dorothea: you need a hobby.

cassia: i have a hobby.

dorothea: staring at jeritza’s face isn’t a hobby.

cassia: you’re right. it’s a profession and i excel at my job.

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cassia, looking in the mirror at 3am trying to practice self love: you’re doing great you stupid bitch..

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manuela: i didn’t want to do this, but i know one way we can get the money.

cassia: you’d make a decent prostitute.

manuela: i’d make an amazing prostitute, but i was actually talking about this guy I know.

----------

byleth: admit it! you like cassia!

jeritza: oh, come on. i mean, am i attracted to cassia? sure. do my days feel better when I’m around her? yeah. does she get me in ways no person ever has? indubitably. do i fantasize about her? sure, of course, but only in two positions. but do I like her? the answer is no.

-----------

cassia: when have i done anything rash or irresponsible?

claude: i keep a list if you wanna see. it’s alphabetized.

-----------

byleth: whose turn is it to give the pep-talk?

cassia: (sighing) felix’s…

felix: fuck shit up out there, but don’t die.

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annette: is anyone else scared?

cassia: not really. i’ve already lived longer than i expected.

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flayn: what is the best way to kill someone?

byleth: kindness.

cassia: If we’re being stealthy, potassium cynaite. otherwise, anything from a knife to a bazooka works...

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cassia: *crying*

byleth: i would like to join you in acknowledging the difficulties of your life

cassia: you are the WORST at this comfort thing

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claude: if edelgard, dimitri and i were drowning, who would you save?

cassia: you morons can’t even swim?

edelgard: teacher, it’s a hypothetical question.

dimitri: yeah, who would you save?

cassia: my time and effort.

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annette: The cookie isn’t sweet enough, and the texture is runny because it’s not fully baked. if I have to rate this, i would give it three points.

cassia: i made it myself…

annette: it’s out of three points.

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edelgard: if I ask you a boy question, will you promise not to be weird?

cassia: i promise.

edelgard: so, there’s this guy-

cassia: you can do better.

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cassia, torturing a prisioner: we have ways of making you talk…

cassia: flayn, what are you doing here? you’re not allowed in here

flayn: (hands her a drawing)

cassia: did you draw this? this is so good! i promise we’ll hang it in the entrance of the dungeon so everyone can see it before they get tortured!

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sylvain: i rarely give compliments, teacher, but that shirt looks great. i bet it would look even better on byleth’s assistant’s bedroom floor.

jeritza: …

cassia: sylvain, are you … hitting on jeritza for me?

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cassia: it’s hard being byleth’s assistant teacher sometimes, but i love the my students and that’s all that-

caspar, in the background: teacher cassia! I tried to make spaghetti in the coffee pot and accidentally broke it!

cassia: *inhales*

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post time-skip, black eagles route

cassia: i need some peace and quiet...

edelgard: i’ll be quiet!

hubert: and i’ll be peace!

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jeritza: everything’s going to be fine. it’s just a crush.

cassia: hey, jeritza!

jeritza: i love you.

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post time-skip, blue lions route

dimitri, talking about cassia: i know you think my judgment’s clouded because i like her a little bit.

dedue: you doodled your wedding invitation

dimitri: no, that’s our joint tombstone.

dedue: ... my mistake.

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post time-skip, hubert’s support

edelgard: (whispering to hubert) start with a compliment! tell her she looks thin.

hubert: (to cassia) you seem malnourished.

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post time-skip, edelgard’s support

ferdinand, watching cassia train: she can’t be good at everything. maybe she’s a bad kisser.

edelgard: no, she’s good at that too.

ferdinand: what?

edelgard: what?

------------

sylvain: I'm grounded?

cassia: yes, you're grounded.

byleth: you disobeyed an order.

dimitri: and now we're going to bury you until you learn your lesson.

cassia:

byleth: dimitri, that's not how grounding works.

-----------

dorothea: i promised byleth we wouldn’t do anything illegal.

cassia:

cassia: Why would you lie to our resident parental figure like that?

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linhardt: i slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so let’s go for 12 more just in case

cassia: linhardt that’s a coma

linhardt: sounds festive

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cassia: don’t worry, i have a permit.

seteth: …this just says ‘i do what i want.’

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cassia: there are no mistakes, just happy little accidents

cassia: ... and lorenz

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post time-skip, golden deer route

cassia: this is it

cassia: this is the darkest timeline

hilda: we just ran out of alcohol you dramatic little bitch

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post time-skip, blue lions route

felix: cassia?

cassia, sighing: jeritza used to call me cassia…

felix: because it’s your fucking name

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cassia: WHO THE FUCK ATE ALL MY MACAROONS?! IM GOING TO KI-

annette: it was me.

cassia: KISS YOUR HEAD SO SOFT BABY, YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU THE MOST RIGHT?

---------

post time-skip, black eagles route

edelgard: so what are we gonna do?

cassia: i don’t know... pizza maybe?

edelgard:

hubert:

ferdinand:

edelgard: about the war, cassia

----------

during a mock battle

ferdinand: start waving your white flag!

hilda: THE ONLY THING I WILL BE WAVING IS YOUR DECAPITATED HEAD ON A STICK IN FRONT OF YOUR WEEPING MOTHER.

cassia: ... Yikes...

----------

cassia: hey flayn, do you think I could fit fifteen macarons into my mouth?

seteth: you're a hazard to society.

flayn: and a coward. do twenty!

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byleth: your trainee said a swear word in class.

cassia: i’ll talk to them about it..

cassia, to lysithea: what the fuck, dude...

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rhea: this was a 100% successful trip.

byleth: we lost cassia.

rhea: this was a 100% successful trip.

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sylvain, flirting with a girl: so, are you from heaven?

cassia: yes, she's a ghost...

cassia: she died fifteen years ago...

cassia: like that pick-up line of yours.

----------

dedue: felix lost cassia…

dimitri: how do you lose a woman?!

ashe: you forget to cherish her.

-----------

cassia: you like me? you like my personality?

byleth: i was surprised too.

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lysithea: [covers cassia’s eyes] guess who? she’s sweet, she’s adorable~

lysithea: and she’s gonna be really mad if you get it wrong!

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ignatz: i lose at everything. i even lost my glasses.

cassia, staring at the glasses on top of his head: i’ll help you find them for five gold...

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jeritza: what are you, a cop? fuck off!

cassia: jeritza...

jeritza: okay, sorry, one more time.

priest:

priest: do you take this woman to be y--

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rhea: cassia, can we speak privately for a minute?

cassia: ooooh, someone’s in trouble!

cassia : no, wait.

cassia : it’s me.

----------

cassia: wait, stop, think!

caspar: no, no, and no.

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bernadetta: i’m just worried about hurting their feelings!

cassia: hurting their feelings…? you just walk around all day caring about peoples’ feelings?

bernadetta: yes, of course. don’t you?

cassia: no.

-----------

byleth: you’re smiling, did something good happen?

cassia: can’t I just smile because I feel like it?

dorothea: seteth tripped and fell in the courtyard.

------------

claude: i trust cassia.

hilda: you think she knows what she’s doing?

claude: ... i wouldn’t go that far.

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cassia: oh, yes, i’ll live.

cassia: but i won’t enjoy it.

-----------

cassia: you piss me off so much.

rhea: i literally just said “hello.“

cassia: yet here i am, boiling with rage.

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cassia: don’t worry, you’ve got everything you need to defeat them.

marianne: the power to believe in myself?

cassia: no, a knife.

cassia: stab them.

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petra: i’ve never done anything wrong in my life

cassia: i know this and i love you

----------

ignatz: *trips on nothing*

cassia: ha, you’re so clumsy.

(5mins later)

cassia: *aggressively punching the air* what’s your–fucking problem huh?? what–did he ever–do to you??

-----------

byleth: now we’re going to compliment the person to our right.

cassia: *looks at seteth fondly*

cassia: nothing brightens up a room like your absence.

------------

shady guy, coming up to cassia: if you care about your student you’ll come with me..

cassia: which student?

shady guy: lorenz hellman gloucester

cassia:

cassia: *turns around and walks away*

-----------

cassia: did it hurt?

jeritza: *rolls eyes* let me guess, when i fell from heaven?

cassia: no

jeritza: what?

cassia, grinning: did it hurt when you fell for me?

jeritza: ...

------------

marianne: does this make me a bad person?

cassia: marianne, there is not a force in history that could make you a bad person...

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cassia: you and me? we both want the same thing.

cassia: but we’re gonna have to work... near each other.

seteth: you mean together, cassia?

cassia, turning around angrily: did you hear me say together??

-----------

cassia: annette’s at that very special age where she has only one thing on her mind.

manuela: boys?

cassia: murder.

----------

cassia: *hugs dimitri*

dimitri: what's this? what's happening?

cassia: it's going to be alright.

dimitri: why are you squeezing me with your body?

cassia: it's a hug, dimitri. i'm hugging you.

-----------

cassia: claude, can we talk, one ten to another?

claude: i’m an eleven, teacher, but continue.

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mercedes: oh fiddlesticks.

cassia: look, i understand this is a tense situation but let's watch the fucking language.

-----------

linhardt: i’m busy.

cassia: do you think drinking 36 glasses of wine consecutively would make my battle senses and crest powers even more heightened or would I just die?

linhardt:

linhardt: i’m on my way.

------------

cassia: we’re engaged

jeritza: IN COMBAT

jeritza: *pulls out his sword*

------------

manuela: why does everybody always assume I'm having a stroke?

cassia: age.

dorothea: diet.

------------

leonie: i sort of did something and i need your advice. but i don’t want a lot of judgment and criticism.

cassia: ... and you came to me?

------------

cassia: what do we say when life disappoints us?

dimitri: called it.

cassia: NO--

------------

cassia: *sees someone do something stupid*

cassia: what an idiot.

cassia: *realizes it’s sylvain*

cassia: oh, that’s my idiot.

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cassia: ferdinand, we tried things your way.

ferdinand: no, we didn't.

cassia: i did it in my head and it didn't work.

------------

manuela: between claude, ignatz, lorenz, and raphael - if you had to - who would you punch?

cassia: no one! they are my golden deer! my students! i wouldn't punch any of them.

manuela: lorenz?

cassia: ... yeah.

------------

cassia: you need them to think that you are stronger than you actually are.

ashe: that’s what you do, right?

cassia: oh, no. my power is no illusion. i can fucking demolish you.

------------

cassia: before i do anything, i ask myself, would rhea do that? and if the answer is yes, i do not do that thing.

------------

flayn: do you really think we should stay outside or do you just not want to deal with this right now?

cassia: two things can be true...

------------

cassia: name a way to be nice to others.

dimitri: don't kill them.

cassia:

cassia: setting the bar a little low, dima, but I'll allow it.

-----------

cassia: remember that time you made me lick the swing set?

dorothea: no, i said "cassia don't lick the swing set!" then you said "don't tell me what to do!" and then you licked the swing set.

-----------

cassia: what are the signs of depression?

byleth: why are you asking?

cassia: manuela was doing laundry earlier and she dropped a sock and i heard her say “why has the goddess forsaken me?”

-------------

cassia: i just realized. i had a terrible childhood.

manuela: yeah, i know.

cassia: what do you mean, “you know”?

manuela: look at the way you stand... people who had good childhoods don’t stand like that.

--------------

cassia: you have to learn to love yourself.

marianne: but don’t you hate yourself?

cassia: yes, but this is about you, stay focused.

--------------

hilda (with lysithea probably): REMEMBER THE PACTS FORGED BETWEEN OUR PEOPLES LONG AGO.

cassia: stop it, it's 4 in the morning.

hilda: YOU PLEDGED ETERNAL SERVITUDE.

cassia: i did not.

hilda: IN EXCHANGE WE WOULD COME TO YOUR AID IN YOUR HOUR OF NEED.

cassia: i'm not feeding you.

hilda: REMEMBER THE PACTS.

--------------

annette: hey, can you do me a favor?

cassia: i’d kill for you, but go on.

-------------

in the garden

mercedes: annette, can you grab that hoe?

annette: *grabs cassia’s arm*

mercedes: wait, that's not what I meant...

------------

flayn: hey cassia, can i go get some candy?

cassia: what did seteth say?

flayn: no.

cassia: then why do you think i’ll let you?

flayn: because seteth’s not the boss of you.

cassia, internally: it’s a trap it’s a trap it’s a trap

-----------

dorothea: if I die, my ghost is gonna haunt you!

cassia: then your ghost is going to see some disgusting stuff.

------------

hubert’s support in a nutshell

hubert, in the margins of his notebook: mywife is soft nd ilikeher

hubert: my wiwwwfie wife is visiting a noble family with the empress and i miss her

hubert: MY EWFIE IS HOME MY WIFE

------------

felix: see? this is my “i don’t care” face.

cassia: that’s your normal face.

-------------

cassia: of course, i care about everyone in this house equally!

claude: we were attacked while you were away.

cassia: is marianne okay???

-------------

cassia: if edelgard jumped off a cliff, would you?

hubert: *stares into the distance with a blank expression*

cassia: hubert!

hubert: well- er- i mean, it depends.

cassia: DON’T JUMP OFF A CLIFF!

hubert: well, i wasn’t planning on it.

cassia: but if edelgard did, you would!?

hubert: *stares into the distance yet again*

cassia: HUBERT!

-------------

lysithea: if i run and leap at cassia, she will almost certainly catch me in her arms.

lysithea: COMING IN! *runs at cassia*

cassia: NO! I’M HOLDING COFFEE!

cassia: *drops the cup and catches her*

------------

leonie: why are you helping me so much?

cassia: because my life is a mess right now and i compulsively take care of other people when i don’t know how to take care of myself.

------------

hubert’s support, post time-skip

dorothea, barging into the library: you two ARE having sex!

hubert: really? cassia, why didn’t you tell me? i would’ve put my book down.

------------

cassia: we have fun, don’t we?

ashe: i have never been more stressed out in my entire life.

------------

cassia: why are we laying on the ground?

sylvain: you got knocked down so i laid next to you so everyone would just think we were chillin’.

------------

petra: i did something terrible.

cassia: it’s okay, i have a shovel.

petra: wait, what do you think i did?

cassia: it doesn’t matter, no one will ever know.

------------

seteth: time for bed.

flayn: cassia says that I can stay up as long as I want, and YOU need to die.

seteth:

seteth: what the heck, cassia-

------------

ingrid: i think rhea is in trouble!

cassia: alright... struggling to give a fuck, if i’m honest.

------------

marianne: i made a friendship bracelet for you!

cassia: i’m not really a jewelry person.

marianne: oh, you don’t have to wear it.

cassia: no, back off, i’m gonna wear it forever.

-----------

manuela: i’m playing a new drinking game. it’s called “Every time i’m depressed, i take a drink.”

dorothea: that game exists. that’s called alcoholism.

manuela and cassia: *take a swig simultaneously*

--------------

during hubert’s support

cassia: i love you. you’re the best thing that ever happened to me.

hubert: i’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you?

cassia: yes.

hubert: … now i’m starting to feel a little sorry for you.

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cassia: alright, listen up you little shits.

cassia: not you, bernadetta. you’re an angel and we’re thrilled you’re here.

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cassia: do you ever wanna talk about your emotions, felix?

felix: no.

sylvain: i do!

cassia: we know, sylvain.

sylvain: i’m sad...

cassia: we know, sylvain.

--------------

cassia: since when is babysitting them my—

cassia: oh, my god, that’s exactly my job.

#i'm trying to pinpoint her personality and i finally think i've got it #so like... just a completely self indulgent long list of convos that never took place #obv these are from various different tv shows/movies/books/etc #also if anyone already used these in a similar manner - sorry also we've ascended #for everyone who knows anything about the game - i have like 10 s support routes prepared for her akljdkksj because no control thot life #THIS IS A WIP and i'll add more of these from time to time~#oc: cassia montal

7 notes · View notes

erosluna · 5 years

Text

Felicity

Next: Felicity p2

Min Yoongi x hybrid reader

wc: 4k

Dying to write a smut shit but damn, some people (me ofc) can’t just get on without proper plot so here we are.

Another roar from the sky is about to come. Though already curled up like a ball, you still pulled in your knee as if they could actually go through your chest to the point that you feel piercing pains on your spine. Your tail is wet from the strong spray coming from the small opening atop the confined space you were shoved in today, nevertheless it stood on end as another thunderclap banged your senses. You can only squeeze your eyes shut and curl up on the cold wet concrete trying to muffle your cries as much as possible. This, you learned from experience, that any sound or cry you make, you will surely get a painful hit from your cager.

Tears fell down your cheek remembering how much you miss your owner, that warm and soft knitted blanket your mama used to tuck you in while she held you in her arms during storms like this, her super comforting scent that would calm you even in the loudest of roars you hear from the sky, even her favorite menthol oil that sent your head and stomach into an automatic spinning state. You were her precious daughter. Her only family. She adopted you when you were just a newborn kitten, you grew up filled with nothing but love, warmth, and affection and there's nothing else in the world you could ever wish for. As you grow older, your mama seemed to grow weaker but since you were always watching her all the time at home, you slowly took over each chore when you feel like she's starting to have trouble doing it herself. Until one day, your mama, your precious mama, got claimed by the roars. She was sitting on the rocking chair at the porch when it started raining heavily. Startled by the first thunderclap, you ran around the house frantically looking for that knitted blanket your mama gave you on your 17th birthday. Finding it on the drawers, you then looked for your mama to lunge hurriedly into her arms but you didn't see her inside the house. Running around tensed like you've never been before, your heart almost stopped seeing her sleeping peacefully in her rocking chair. "Mama! Get inside you'll get soaked, you'll sneeze! Mama! Mama come here!" you couldn't get out. You're too afraid to step outside the door knowing the monster of your dreams is around here. You see a flash of light draw from the sky and by instinct squeezed your eyes and prepared to receive another roar but then you remember your mama, with the roar coming anytime, you can't let her be exposed like that, it is extremely dangerous. With that, you gathered up all the courage you could muster to save your most precious mama from the monster, you opened the door slowly and crept your way to her chair. As expected, she's already soaked in rain but her serene sleeping face shows nothing against it. You calmed down a bit seeing her this way but the roar suddenly dropped and it made you jump. "Mama, mama come one now. You'll get sneezes if we don't get covers soon. Mama!" No budge. You decided to just pull her up and wrapped her arm on top of your shoulder to support her weight, you got a bit startled as her icy skin touched the back of your neck, but this isn't important now. You carried her on your back ever so carefully, already used to her weight and lifted her with ease having much adrenaline running through you. You lay her on the couch near the fireplace, slowly lowering her head down the armrest, and then run upstairs to get a change of clothes for the two of you.

How can she be sleeping with the roars like this? Mama's so cold from the rain, she's like ice I better prepare hot tea soon as she wakes up before she catch those sneezes.

Gathering a pile of clothes on your arms you headed straight to her, dried her up and change her clothes for her. Then you went to pick up that knitted blanket you dropped before fighting the roar and wrapped it around her, before you lay your head on her lap, you took her arm and placed it against your cheek. You recalled her story just last night after the weather report on the radio. About the roars.

Your ears propped up with the sound of footsteps drawing close. Did I let out a cry? You thought to yourself. Expecting another beating, you perched you self hard on the corner of the room, squinting to the coldness of concrete against you. Those footsteps... Why are there so many? Whose voices are these? Your head is about to break, the stress is getting too much but you bit your tongue to keep yourself from howling for the better, or anything less from the worst. Suddenly a shout telling everyone to move away from the door erupted from a distance. Loud bangings came one after another, a lot of voices and cries filled your ears each one getting distant moments later. The ramblings eased up and you thought maybe they weren't coming to hit you, then you heard a pair of footsteps drawing near. Slow footsteps stopping every now and then but surely headed to your direction. "Is anyone inside? Hello? Move away from the door." You didn't answer, there's no way. You will never let out any sound from your mouth ever again, you don't wanna get hit, and then your door was kicked open. "W-hat's happening? Who are you? I didn't cry, please don't hurt me I didn't cry! It was the rain! I-" the man who kicked your door open lifted his arms and you prepared to receive the hit, you got so scared of the sight and startled that you couldn't swallow your voice and you just squeezed your eyes shut-- then you felt a soft tug on your shoulder. "Hush- hush baby, you're safe now. Come on, get up. We'll leave this place, okay?". Without fully understanding, you stood up obediently looking down, still expecting the hit to land anytime as the strange man guided you out of the confined room. In your head you imagine a more crampled and confined space than the previous room you were in, you only got moved there this morning and you're afraid you must've angered them that much with your weeping.

To your surprise, the strange man actually led you outside. It was raining hard and there were so many cars with colored blazing lights that almost blinded you as you still haven't adjusted yet from that dark space you were in. He removed his jacket and placed it on your shoulder, his hands covered your head as he ran and led you inside one of the cars.

"I got her!" The strange man said to the other men. You don't understand what's happening but you kept yourself quiet, behaved and your gaze will never lift off the floor.

"I can't believe we almost left one back there, damn she could've died alone." "I know dude, I wonder though how Officer Min knew that there's still a soul inside. I swear she never know how to make a sound!"

You woke up with the rambling voices around you, there were so many people, and so many of your kind too. The place was well lit, clean and warm but still, fear took over you and you curled up instinctively again. "Hello, how are you? What's your name?" A voice hovered on top of you. You wouldn't answer for a sound you make means a hit. "You must be hungry, do you want to eat?" You don't know, and you can't answer to this either, they just shove in your food by the door, you know that.

Three days have passed and still Min Yoongi couldn't shake you off his mind. He has lead numerous operations like this before, finding victims of worse and gruesome states, but the look on your eyes bore a hole through his soul. There's an ache from within him that no amount of sleep or medicine could relieve, finally he reached for the telephone and dialed the Hybrids Protection Desk where they've turned you over.

"She's not on the missing list, sir. She wouldn't breathe a word too so we can't extract any information from her, for all we know she could be mute. The others have been claimed already, we'll take this one on our custody."

"Is that so? If anything comes up, let me know."

"Right, okay sir. Let us take it from here, you need not to worry."

"Oh, and she actually spoke to me. She's not mute."

"Ah- sir are you sure? This is the cat hybrid, white ear and tail with a portion of black in the end we're talking about right?"

"Yes, she was scared. She's mentioned about hitting or something idk i couldn't hear her clearly."

"Okay sir, give me a minute and I'll call you back."

Yoongi felt pained knowing of your current situation, there's no reason for this, he kept telling himself. Why was he so concerned about you? His fingers tapped nonstop unconsciously on the table, mind drifted back to hearing your silent cry. He found you in a secret room within walls the team had no idea of, it was behind the lot and almost underground. Everyone thought that the small hole was a part of drainage system where he peeked inside and found you tightly hidden in the corner. Wondering how in the world he could have heard you from your position- then the phone rang.

He picked the receiver in a heartbeat.

"Yes sir, it's me. Do you think it's possible for you to come over tomorrow if you have time?"

"Tomorrow? What time does your office close?"

"7pm sir, but it's okay you can come some other time if you're busy."

Yoongi glances at the clock, 6:48pm.

"Do you think you can wait for me? I'll be there in 20 minutes."

"You mean, now sir? You can come by some other da-"

"I really want to. I'm on my way."

And with that, Yoongi bolted out in a hurry to come see you again.

Your ears twitched as you catch a scent, a familiar scent.

"Good evening head officer Min, please take a sit. Do you want coffee or juice?"

"I wanna see her now."

"Oh, okay sir my bad, this way please."

Yoongi's hands trembled while speed walking behind the personnel, heart beat ever so loud he could almost feel it on his back. You were inside a big white room, sitting tightly at the corner gaze never leaving the floor. The personnel held the door open as he ushered Yoongi inside, he stood frozen at the sight of you. A feeling from the guts once again swirled from within him.

"Okay sir, I'll leave you for a moment now. Please let us know if you get any reaction from her, it'd be of great help."

"A-alright."

The personnel left you two. You knew who this man was, the strange man. The one who pulled you out of that place. Your mind shut down when you got transferred to this white place days ago, afraid or whatever, you wouldn't lift your gaze off the floor, but the moment his scent registered your senses sprung back to system.

"It's me."

You slowly shift your gaze across the floor on his shadow. The personnel was watching you from the glass window of the room, surprised that you seem to respond with the most minute movement of your eyes, he ran to get the resident psychiatrist of the facility.

Yoongi drew closer to you. He lowered himself down trying to catch your gaze but you buried you face in your arms once again. He then sat a few inches from you leaning against the wall.

The personnel together with the psychiatrist hurriedly turned on the monitor and connected the headsets to try and listen as Yoongi conversed with you. Taking notes and carefully watching the scene as this seemed to be of high importance knowing officer Min Yoongi was in a rush, himself.

"Mama-" you whispered. All ears, Yoongi waited for you to continue. "August 19, Elizabeth Cowell."

The prying heads from the monitoring room quickly ran a search from their system and files popped up. This is it.

"And your name?"

You carefully lifted your face, hesitant about meeting his gaze but something in you felt warm with this strange man's presence.

"She's gone."

"Sir! We got something!" the personnel came to fetch Yoongi after half an hour to report the file they've seen, a fresh case.

"Her owner was found dead, 20th of august lying on a couch comfortably. Death was of old age. On the record she had no family, but she had a female hybrid she kept as daughter for 17 years, that wasn’t around on the scene, she must have been kidnapped right then." the personnel eagerly reported. "What was her name?" Yoongi inquired. "Sir, the name is Y/N". "So basically she's an orphan now?" "Yes sir, we'll put her under therapy since it seemed she has been traumatized heavily and then we'll set her for adoption?".

"How long?" "We're not sure sir, but we'll update yo-" "Sir, do you want to take her in?" the psychiatrist finally butted in. "Is that possible?" Yoongi mused.

The personnel's jaw dropped open as Yoongi left the facility with you. He actually made the man pull up the documents, signed, payed everything right then and there. "Do you know what just happened?" the psychiatrist asked the personnel. "No idea, doc." "Page 62 to 67, you should know more about hybrids." the psychiatrist answered passing the personnel a thick book about the subject.

It’s been 3 months since Yoongi took you into his home. Compared to how you were when he visited you at the protection desk, you have progressed a lot. You were supposed to undergo therapy that should take a year at least as the psychiatrist said but seeing you now only proves that Yoongi made the right decision to take you as you were back then. You almost had no voice. You only do as he says, eyes stuck to the ground and ears always pressed on your head. Before taking you in, Yoongi was a solitary man. Being an unwanted child of both rich but clumsy teenage couple who later on decided they don’t want to settle with anybody, more so a baby, he was raised by a maid in a mansion in a very remote place from when he was little. His childhood should have been a difficult phase knowing the boy’s position in life and overflowing curiosity of children his age, except it wasn’t. Yoongi turned out to be a highly introverted child with sharp intuition, he was smart and resourceful thus not actually needing the help of others in solving any question a child could think of on his own. He loved reading. From educational, to literary, politics, everything under the sun, no matter what the text is about, his eyes would easily devour the words forming with every letter that would come across his sight. He loved music just as much, but as the trend suggested a spiraling fall for the essence of new songs, he stopped listening and preserved what he used to adore back in the good old days. Growing up, Yoongi didn’t change much. He socializes barely enough to progress in school, to take a degree, to finally work, and to start standing on his own feet and totally detach from the lifeline of finances from the two names he only had known from his bank account. As to why he took such career path, no one knows, but just one day, he found himself prolonging a finished operation hearing things and searching frantically for the source of a silent voice that no one else could hear. That’s where he found you. You were a victim of serial kidnapping of hybrids that had just reached your town.

Hearing the familiar sound of the engine coming from a distance, you rush from your room down to the front door waiting for a specific vehicle to come into vision and in a minute the car arrives. Only when the car window rolled down and seeing Yoongi wave his hand did you step out and hurriedly open the gate. You waited for him to park thoroughly before closing the gate again and waited back inside the house right behind the door. Yoongi entered the house and stood in front of you eagerly waiting for you to greet him, you silently gasped for air summoning all the courage you got to finally gaze right back at him who readily had a smile waiting across his face. “W-welcome home, Yoongi.” You whispered. “Wow, baby it only took you 3 minutes today! Look!” He enthusiastically showed you the timer on his phone making your lips slightly curve upward. “I-is that.. Could you possibly be smiling now baby?” he tried to lift your chin yearning to see your sweet little face but you jumped at his touch and ran back up to your room with your tail wagging like crazy.

“Seokjin hyung, there’s no mistake. I have multiple references to confirm this action, hang on let me send you a video of how it looked like.” Seokjin was the resident psychiatrist who permitted Yoongi to take you out of their facility right off the bat. “I see, if that’s what it really is then that’s great! I’m sure you know what it means though, she can now display her excitement and happiness, I wonder what you did to get such a jolt of progress just today.” “Well, I- let’s see. I praised her for breaking a record in meeting gazes, and then I- oh this is the part where she ran away, I tried to touch her face. Sorry.” “No, that’s alright, her ears were alright.. right?” “Yes hyung, it wasn’t pinning down hear head.” “Okay then, glad to hear her progress, I think she’d open up real soon. Please be patient with her officer Min, she’d heal up eventua-“ “Hyung I’m in no rush, she got all the time in the world, no one’s chasing her .” “Good to know.”

After recording Yoongi’s update on his files, a feeling of relief and satisfaction flooded Seokjin’s heart. The psychiatrist not only intended to heal the traumatized you but the almost permanently closed up persona of Yoongi as well. You sure have made an impressive progress, but how far Yoongi have leaped is just unimaginable. Picturing you two from the monitor back then, just one look, and he knew that you both were the key to open each other’s cage.

It’s getting late, the roars aren’t stopping, and this heavy downpour won’t ease up anytime soon. You can’t help yourself but panic because as much as the roar scares you, the knot in your stomach for the missing Yoongi makes you delve in great distress that could almost break you.

“Sir you can’t drive in a storm like this, it’s too dangerous please stay a bit” three lower ranked officers scrambled on their feet to stop Yoongi on his tracks since he’s determined to leave even knowing that the road is far from being friendly for his drive, but as time passes the downpour is just getting worse making him desperate to leave all the more. Yoongi knew how much this phenomenon scares you, he witnessed you three times suffering from the impact of thunderclaps on your ultra-sensitive hearing, rare occasions where you’d disregard everything and run straight in his arms to hide, how he’d have to actually hold to real tight to calm you down. “Look dude, if you’re scared then just stay here. I have important things to tend to and I swear if you stop me this time you’re all gonna regret this. Understand?!” Angry, Yoongi shoved the blocking party out of his way and leaped through the distance to his car in an unbelievable speed. He smashed the car keys and hit the gas before anyone can follow, at this point Yoongi became nothing but a road killer. The slippery road and strong wind had no say from his determination just to reach you as soon as possible.

You were curled up on the floor by the open door, ears pinned down, and tail between your legs. You would have wanted to reach the gate atleast to open it up for Yoongi in case he arrives but the sound of roars behind the doors exceeded your limits and the blinding thunder lines drawn consecutively across the dark sent you shaking that your legs couldn’t bring itself to take another step and instead let you down flopping on the floor. The heavy downpour showed you no mercy as the rain drenched completely in a matter of seconds, suddenly you’re back to that night. Behind your tightly shut eyelids you see the sky lit up much brighter and the loudest roar soon followed completely knocking out your already drifting consciousness.

You’ve been out cold for half an hour when Yoongi finally arrived. One headlight of the car busted, a huge dent on its side, none of it mattered with what he saw the moment he eyed you by the door. He rushed down from his car and climbed over the gate, even almost stumbling to ground, he needed to reach you. And he did. He carried you in his arms, kicked the door close and sat by the fireplace. Tears are rolling down his cheeks, seeing you like this reminds him of the night he first found you. A heart pounding directly at your ear called forth your consciousness, you opened your eyes and there you were cradled by a strange man. “Y/n, I will not let the roars take you. Soon they might claim me but do not worry. Mama loves you and my only duty in this world is to love you and keep you safe. Until your one true protector comes I will always watch you from where I’ll be even if the roars have taken me.” You hear the words clearly as the memory rolled back in your head. You gazed up to see what the owner of the arms holding you looked like. Tears wouldn’t stop falling from his eyes when they held your gaze firmly. You were both drenched from the rain but the warmth radiating from this man was enough to keep you content and comfortable, you leaned back to his chest to once again to hear the beating of his heart and the comforting rhythm pulled a soft purr out of you “What is your name?” you asked without a sound, “I am Min Yoongi, your protector” he answered in his head. He felt your soft ears rising from under his chin, and your tail delicately curling up around his waist.

Feeling your stable and minute rise and fall on his arms soothed the ravaging worries on Yoongi’s mind. He’s been watching your serene sleeping image in his cradle for who knows how long, he wanted to run his hand through your hair, so he carefully shifted you for better support, his fingers brushed your cheek ever so lightly but still you twitched. There’s a weak electric sensation from where he touched your face waking you up once again, in his arm. You held his hand hung only a few inches from your face, and it was cold. “Sneezes! You’ll get sneezes! We need to change, come on!” Your sudden energy surprised Yoongi the most, with what happened the moment you spoke earlier he knew that things are going to change but this made his heart more complacent. You shuffled from his cradle and pulled his hand as you stood up. Not recognizing where you are, you looked around with slight confusion drawn on your face, seeing this, Yoongi took a step and lead you to your room.

TBC

#bts #hybrid bts #min yoongi #yoongi #suga #bts scenarios #bts au #bts fanfiction #yoongi au

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mcrmadness · 4 years

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Idk what anxiety mode I’m slowly entering again but I sure am stressed out for some reason. And today feeling so angry about every little thing basically. I mean, I bought this Planet Zoo game because Zoo Tycoon games were my childhood and I’ve been doing nothing but playing that game the whole day and it’s going fine - except this one zoo went into bankrupt and there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it and it’s pissing me off.

Also, I had to quite the game in the middle of playing because I started having anxiety because I felt like I’m missing out _things in the internet. Nothin actual, but somehow just felt like I cannot focus on this game too much now because I’m going to miss something important. Mainly it’s all about bands: MCR announced gigs for several other continents now but no Europe and I’m afraid to miss out in case they will have something in Europe too. And with Die Ärzte I’m always feeling like my head is gonna explode. And now there’s also a Lindemann tour coming and they have a gig in Finland too and the ticket sales start on Friday and I’m going to try to buy tickets to there too. And I’m also stressing out because of money because I don’t know what the heck all MCR and DÄ planning on and I’m afraid of not having enough money in case I need to buy even more things or even concert tickets.

Then, I also have this new things called “neuropsychiatric training” going on and well, it’s interesting but also not really fitting my rebellious nature. Like, why the fuck should I do things the way someone else thinks is right to do? Why the fuck I can’t do things just my own way. It’s pissing me off. Yeah I have problems with maintaining my life but since they don’t always even feel like problems, so where’s the problem now? I mean, we set tasks for me. We meet with this “trainer” twice a week and today I’ve just felt like it’s all too much and I wanna stop everything. Today is one of those days when I feel like I hate everything and doing dishes feels like it’s a never-ending worksite. No matter how much I dishes I do, there’s always going to be more. And it makes me angry and want to stop using any plates and utensils and stop eating and just mope in the corner because fuck dishes.

We’re trying to focus on how to keep things in order once we get them in order. And honestly, I don’t know if I’m even cabable of that. I’m just feeling angry. I’m just... I overthink all the time. Most of the time I can e.g. walk in the supermarket just fine but then there’s days when I just don’t have any energy for thinking about everything and I wanna just collpase on the floor and not buy a single food product because everything either feels wrong or I don’t like it how they taste of feel in my mouth.

Recycling is hard. I’m trying my best but sometimes it’s pain in the ass. I hate it when I can’t find the recycling markings on the packages. Or when I find them, I never remember what they mean. Or sometimes they have this logo meaning it’s recyclable BUT WHERE THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO PUT THAT? If it doesn’t tell it’s material, how am I supposed to know in which recycling bin it goes to??????? Then I might spend quite a long time sitting at my computer or phone reading about recycling but nothing stays in my head and I’m even more confused than before. Sometimes I think “fuck it” and throw everything in the same bag but then regret it and actually go back and find the things I know I can recycle, from the bag. I have so many empty shampoo or cleaning product bottles here and this trainer suggested that I just throw them away as it’s really difficult to empty them + she thinks I’m already recycling really well. But I don’t agree. Every time I put something in the normal trash because I have no energy for thinking, I get bad conscience and I just hear all kinds of phrases I’ve heard people say or have read from somewhere and they haunt me as I feel like... basically a criminal. That’s why empty trash pile up on my tables and stuff because I don’t know where to put them and I don’t have the energy for wondering that once again and I avoid that feel of bad conscience for putting them in somewhere where they don’t belong to.

I’ve always been bit rebellious and stubborn too. It’s sometimes really difficult to me to draw the line between friendly, over-friendly and being taken advantage of. I don’t mind helping people but sometimes, if I feel like I’m told to do something (instead of being asked nicely), I go into this rebellious mode when I don’t want to do anything just for the sake of not doing, because why should I listen to other people’s orders? I’m an adult, for fuck’s sake. And sometimes I feel like I’ve got stuck to this “I just turned 18 I’m adult now u can’t tell me to do things anymore!” phase and 18 I turned 10 years ago... Sometimes this even affects my friendships. And now I feel like I’m... feeling offended by this trainer as she comes to MY home to tell ME how I’M supposed to do things. If I don’t want to put my empty milk cartons inside each other, is that really that big of a deal then? Just an example but maybe you get the point. And the worst is I don’t know how to say no but I come up with all kids of excuses to why I can’t do that or why I maybe don’t do something. Or why I do something that others don’t do. Sometimes it’s bit difficult to be around her now, we’ve only met 4 times so far so no idea how it’s all going to go. I kinda feel ashamed if I haven’t done the tasks but I also feel bit stupid if I do the tasks so it’s like... I can’t win. And I also don’t like compliments and I don’t like being told how good it is that I did something. It makes me feel even more rebellious. Should do again things for Friday but I just feel so firstrated when I think about the dishes that are never gonna end no matter how many times I wash them over and over again.

#me #personal #anxiety and/or stress stricking in #another day when I just feel like I could stop the clocks and just be as I don't know for how long m #my* nerves can take all this #I'm already in the constant alter mode (more or less...) and even tho the band things are positive they still affect my nerves negatively #also I'm feelin hyperactive at the same time and feel like talking about _something with _someone but AGAIN I don't know what #are those things I want to talk about or with whom. Or I have a hunch but no can do and I should stop obsessing and it's also something that #is bugging me now all the time......... like brains can't you just stop thinking everything? Just for ocnce???#once*#maybe I'll go to check what's on tv #which reminds me of another thing I should do #and actually two other things I should do #oh gosh just toooooooo many things for one week and I can't handle it and I stop fucking caring about anything and want to just isolate #and mope because fuck everything. I hate adulting.

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jumpboy-rembrandt · 6 years

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hey do yall wanna hear an au idea i’ve had abt the seven birds as a superhero team? the plot is constantly changing, but here’s what i’ve got (warning it’s a lot and bullet points are used gratuitously):

an alien object falls to the earth, breaking apart as it falls. it scatters around a small city, and the pieces seem to hone in on the nearest living human once they near the ground.

(psst – this is the light of creation)

these seven (mostly) unrelated people slowly realize that they now have…unusual abilities

another alien entity follows, and its agents begin wreaking havoc around this city searching for the missing pieces of the light

(psst – this is the hunger)

individually, each person touched by the light ventures out to fight off these beings, especially since they themselves tend to be targeted.

these agents can get a vague sense of where the shards are, but not who exactly has them. thus, there is some degree of investigation done to find the individuals.

said agents can either be sentient or monster-like

the light-holders are all disguised as they fight – some for anonymity, some so that these agents have more trouble seeking them out, and some just because it seems like the right thing to do.

none of them knew each other before now, but they cross paths often enough that they realize they should probably group up.

most of them want to keep their identities secret, so they agree to do that while also making a few other decisions:

they should all have each others’ numbers. they won’t seek each other out, but it is important to keep in contact.

they should get better costumes (a plea from taako, who subsequently makes them)

they should have a theme

so they decide upon uniform colors and the title of “seven birds” because…idk, maybe they all like how poetic it sounds?

anyway, here’s a breakdown of each member:

magnus was struck by the light while sparring with carey behind their apartment complex. he was knocked over and carey kinda panicked?? but then he got up and said “did you do that?” and she responded “how would i hurl something at you from the sky, you’re fucking huge” and they moved past it

carey and magnus are roommates, so she’s the first one to notice when he starts accidentally breaking things and can knock her down more easily.

the weirdest part was when he was carving a little figurine and she jumped up behind him – to be fair, she thought he was drawing plans for something at the carpentry shop. they both saw the knife go directly towards his fingers and…bounce off. being magnus, he immediately tried to stab his hand and nothing happened. carey, being carey, poked the edge to see if it was dull and, ow, no, it wasn’t.

so, magnus has super strength and armor-like skin. a downside to this is that the changes weren’t entirely magic (think commitment), so he has to eat a lot more than usual and that’s. not insignificant.

the superhero name he chooses is eagle, which he called out immediately bc he wanted the best bird. his color theme is orange. his uniform doesn’t have sleeves, and it was a struggle for taako to even make him wear a shirt.

merle was hiking through the woods, and when he got hit he actually blacked out for a little bit. he woke up in a bed of flowers and, huh, that’s really convenient how it broke my fall

he works part time as an EMT and spends the rest working in a plant nursery. i. think you can guess how he notices what’s going on.

merle’s power is accelerating and manipulating organic growth, which means that he can both control plants and heal wounds. this does take a physical toll, as it is his energy being transferred. he also needs to eat a lot.

his superhero name is dove bc ~peace~ and stuff. his color theme is, naturally, green.

taako and lup were. uh. not getting in trouble. they were just having a misunderstanding. fortunately, said misunderstanding was not as fast as they were bc the misunderstanding was missing their shoes. they stumbled and fell as the light split at the last second and hit them both, but they quickly jumped back to their feet, turned a corner, and were home free.

both of them are studying masters level chemistry, so their discoveries are in public and require a bit of covering up. taako was trying to work out the chemical structure of a fairly simple crystal when it moved. he jumped, then tried it again, and found out that he could even separate out certain parts without needing a reactant.

lup gets bored waiting for a solution to boil and suddenly it explodes

taako’s power is manipulating chemical structures and lup’s is causing combustion or explosions. both require a knowledge of chemistry; taako has to understand the structure of what he’s moving or separating, and lup needs to know about boiling/ignition points and pressure changes etc. again; the energy comes from them. you get the point by now, i think.

taako is starling and purple, and lup is phoenix and red.

they both have pockets containing little beads of easy-to-change materials if they can’t find anything else to use

barry is a phd student, and was in the basement bio lab of the local university when the light phased through the ceiling and hit him. he stumbled backwards and fortunately didn’t hurt himself, bc he basically lives in there and no one would check on him for a while.

the next time he’s forced into a university function, he’s shrinking against a wall wishing he wasn’t there, and then he…isn’t. he falls over into the next room bc he just went through the wall.

i’ll be honest – barry basically has danny phantom powers. the tricky bit is that if he’s exhausted, instead of losing his powers, he can’t keep a physical form very well. finally, a reason for this man to get some sleep already.

his codename is nightingale and his color is blue. thank goodness he can make his clothes and glasses ghost with him, or else he’d be recognizable and useless.

davenport was relaxing with a short flight just outside of town. he notices some strange lights, then realizes one is coming towards him, then barely manages to keep the plane from crashing when it hits him in the head. he quickly lands and checks the plane for damage, but there’s no trace of it.

his mind is wandering during a pretty boring meeting one day when everyone suddenly stops. davenport tunes in and notices that, um, there’s a small boat appearing to float across the table. this completely snaps him out of his thoughts, and it disappears. it’s a good thing the old people on the board like to brush over unexplainable things, bc after a few moments, the meeting picks back up.

he works at a nerd museum. he mostly enjoys it, but also wants to save up enough to move to the coast.

his power is creating illusions and, depending on his energy, materializing them. the illusions barely cost anything, but the materialization is really draining.

his hero name is canary and his color theme is gold.

i wanted it to be albatross at first, but that sounded a little…eh? i liked canary better, esp since it’s yellow

+ instead of having half the symbolism of a curse, it symbolizes freedom!! i think that’s an important dav trait.

finally, lucretia was riding home on her bike and, unlike dav, did crash. strangely, she and her bike were totally unharmed.

lucretia works part-time as a secretary to save up for college, while also working at a bookstore bc she is a Nerd. she got lost in the Deep Shelves and, when a pile of books fell and set off a domino effect, she stretched out her hands to stop them – and they actually did stop.

lucretia can create force fields of any shape, and move them around. that may seem simple, but she can ride them like a hover board, trap people, and, if she’s strong enough, slice things.

her superhero name is bluejay and her color is teal.

other characters include:

julia, magnus’s coworker/boss’s daughter, and they’ve been in love since forever. when the light stuff started though, magnus figured he should slow down.

…yeah, she figures it out pretty soon. magnus is bad at keeping secrets.

carey, magnus’s roommate and constant alibi/excuse-maker/back-up

killian, who works security at the business lucretia secretaries at, and keeps bringing her out to social stuff bc the girl needs it. they also talk abt girls a lot bc they’re both Gay™ – lucretia especially enjoys teasing killian about carey with the “really great calves” from the gym.

killian accidentally said weird shit when first gushing about her and, of course, lucretia will never forget it

noelle was saved by the team from whatever the hell lucas ends up doing in this au. carey offers to share her room, esp since magnus is uh. working a little more irregularly these days and they could use the split rent.

noelle and carey also talk about girls, including killian who could “probably throw me across a room” from the gym.

angus was looking into all this nonsense and figured it was easiest to track down twins who seem to know a lot about chemistry. it wasn’t too hard. taako and lup were appalled that his parents Just Let Him Do That and so there’s a 50/50 chance that angus is in their spare room at any given time.

listen they got a two-bedroom apartment, but apparently they’re still too clingy to sleep alone. nerds.

ren is taako’s coworker and best friend. she knows Something is up, but isn’t entirely sure What. she also knows better than to try and find out. taako will tell her when he tells her.

honestly i low low lowkey dig the idea of noelle/ren but you didn’t hear that from me. if it happens to show up though. oh well.

avi makes frequent deliveries for the hammer and tongs, and is pretty tight with magnus. he’s even tighter with magnus’s dogs, which stay at the h&t bc his apartment is run by ruthless monsters.

johann is the town’s dramatic and overtalented musician, who is almost always in the background. i’m not sure what his deal is, but he sure is good at music.

hurley is a cop who keeps trying to figure out what is going on, but isn’t having much luck

artemis sterling is the very frustrated mayor

certain people are given powers by the hunger, a la hawk moth. these include gundren, magic brian, jenkins, sloane, the hammerheads, cpt cpt bane, lucas, etc.

the major manifestation of the hunger is john, but only merle manages to see him.

unlike miraculous, the hunger is dangerous to its hosts if they become disagreeable. the birds can save the people possessed, but it’s not easy.

there are Mysterious Third Parties that can grant additional powers

one is known as the raven queen. she grants kravitz the power to possess non-organic materials, as well as a scythe that can temporarily dislocate souls and do mild portal shit.

kravitz was a coroner trying to get a gig in the orchestra, but then he almost died and the raven queen resurrected him and he’s got a really strong sense of duty so he’s doing this now, he guesses. at least he still gets to have a normal life when he isn’t busy.

i like to think that after sloane rejects the hunger, the raven queen scoops her up and also grants the ability to possess non-organic objects. she was a good mechanic before, and is super good now. she gets hurley to give up on the whole investigation thing and join her and they live happily ever after, and also kick the occasional ass.

at first, RQ’s orders are to retrieve the light so it doesn’t fall into the wrong hands, but taako persuades kravitz that the birds are able to use it to defeat the hunger once and for all.

after that, the mission is just to keep as many people out of danger as possible.

istus and pan can also grant powers, but i’m not sure how they’d fit in yet

more random facts:

taako, lup, and barry are actually at the same university even though they never see each other. the mascot is a mongoose.

at some point the bio and chem departments are doing a joint conference thing. taako and lup are wandering around while spamming the birds’ group chat with really awful memes with magnus. meanwhile, barry is trying his best to ignore his constantly-vibrating phone as he talks to a professor about something actually important.

do they find each other in this truly ridiculous way? You Decide.

lucas is in the same department as barry, and even though he’s kind of a genius, he is also. how you say. a dick.

ren and taako work as chefs at the davy lamp. ren is almost definitely going to own it one day, and taako is proud of her.

lucretia and magnus meet via carey and killian, and quickly become close friends. because magnus is incapable of keeping a secret from anyone he knows, she finds out that he’s eagle and so they now know each other’s secret identities.

anyway that’s all i’ve got for now, thanks for coming to my ted talk

#ok i'm going to sleep #this is mostly for my own rference #not that i'd ever write this but it's nice to think abt #text #ipre #idk how ekse to tag uh #bye #fixed the tenses! and added stuff!#superhero au

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5hfanfiction · 6 years

Text

our broken white rose ⇾ camren

a/n: hi guys…!!! i suck, I fuckin know. i haven’t updated since august and truly honestly, i have no excuse other than life happened and shit hit the fan. i kinda wanna explain so y'all know even tho most of you probably don’t give a fuck honestly. ok sooo for starters as some of you may know or knew but forgot, i have a fiancée and we were trying to get pregnant and have a kid awhile ago and she did successfully get pregnant and well… things have been hectic. looks like we’re expecting double the trouble. twin girls lol. um, idk it took me awhile to wrap my head around it. i kinda envisioned parenthood at one at a time even tho the possibility of multiple is there, i never thought it’d go down in my life. but i guess this is god’s plan for me and i’m gonna love those two girls with all my heart.

college has truly been kicking my ass, on top of my moody, grumpy and randomly sad as fuck fiancée, but i’m getting by. currently on winter break so i decided i’d finally sit down and update. my fiancée went out to south jersey to visit her parents and i’m here in north jersey with the house finally to myself. maybe i can make a mess without getting yelled at by her now fhdjdjdkd lol. anyways, that’s basically the gist of what’s been going on. college wants me dead, my fiancée is carry two fetuses inside her and her due date is approaching dangerously fast. lmao. don’t you live life? smh.

anyways, the last thing i wanna share with y'all before i start the story is, I HAVE A NEW BOOK THAT IM ACTUALLY GONNA BE COMMITTED TO COMING OUT RIGHT ATTER I PUBLISH THIS CHAPTER! its called ‘one night stand’ and yesss, it has smut. so please go check it out after this. i have some really cool ideas for it but i need feedback on whether i should waste my time continuing or not. for my tumblr readers, its most likely up on my wattpad as you read this so go follow it @ wthbello and add the book to your library. please comment and vote. with that being said, i hope you enjoy the story. make sure to read end of the chapter questions and answer them. thanks so much, enjoy my usual angst filed, depressing ass stories!

***

“She what?” Both Camila and Lauren shouted in unison as they slowly but frantically followed after Lucy.

Lucy walked at a jagged pace desperately attempting to reach her rental as she explained. “She was granted parol and was released today. Janelle asked me to come see her today, you know, figure out a way to get her out. She was going on and on about how Lola had a plan to go and get your kids. Dustin, Lana and Luna. So I tracked you down to warn you,” she explained in a rushed tone as they finally reached her rented Mazda.

Camila eyes Lucy in suspicious, still anxious being around her after everything. “How did you even get out?” She asked before her eyes enlarged as realization struck. She looked at Lauren in panic. “T-The kids. They’re with Normani, she just took Dustin not too long ago,” Camila had completely forgotten all about Ariana. I’ll text her later, she thought distractedly as her two daughters and infant son came to mind.

Lucy stopped at the vehicle taking a deep breath. She looked them dead in the eye as she pulled the drivers side handle open. “I’ve been out for two months Camila,” the last thing on her mind was explaining her reasoning. She didn’t want to talk about. She didn’t feel she needed to talk about it. She just wanted to forget. Lucy climbed in the all black car, leaving her door open as she peered up at the two mother’s before her. “As for Normani, Tori’s got it,” Lucy smirked. “Now get the fuck in the car.”

Lauren spoke up for the first time in awhile, “What the hell is going on Lucia?” Her hands shook as she gazed down at the woman. So much built up anger and hatred yet confusion and hurt bubbled within her as she stared the woman down.

Lucy’s smirk soon fell as regret and sorrow filled her eyes. “I was terrible… to both of you. I fucked up so much in the last and this is my chance to fix it. Please. Trust me.”

Maybe a couple years ago, Lauren would jump at the thought of trusting Lucy. How couldn’t she? She’d never lie to her, correct? Wrong. For years, she was lied to and fooled to believe the love of her life, the mother of her children, was gone. And Lucy was an accomplice. She didn’t think she could ever trust the woman again. But something about the look in Lucy’s eyes seemed to draw her in. She wasn’t sure how she was feeling, but right now she knew her safety, Camila’s safety and hers were in severe danger with that crazy bat out.

Camila and Lauren both looked at each other before sharing a small, risky mutual agreement. Lauren rounded the vehicle and got in the passenger seat as Camila went into the back, sitting in the middle so she could peer at the two women in front of her.

“Where to?” Camila asked.

Lucy turned to look at the woman in the backseat, a small smirk playing on her lips. “Yakutat Alaska.”

***

“It feels so gross being back her,” Camila mumbled, hugging her arms loosely around herself as Lauren draped her own arm over her shoulder. She still didn’t know how she felt about her relationship with Lauren. The sudden proposal still replayed in her head but she didn’t have time to think about that right now. Her mind wondered as she thought about the safety of her kids and the weariness of Lola being out of prison… again. Her life just seemed to be a never ending pile of destruction and she just wanted to run away… like Lauren said. Her eyebrows furrowed as she turned to look at the woman next to her. She went to open her mouth and question her before shaking her head and deciding to keep it shut until later on.

“Tell me about it,” Lucy mumbled as she locked the doors of the rental car.

Lauren huffed softly, her grip on Camila tightening. “So are you gonna explain why we’re here?”

Lucy nodded distractedly as she smacked her lips and nodded off towards her right as they began walking towards a group of buildings. “Janelle told me that Lola was granted parole in Yakutat because this initially is where the crime took place which I think is complete bullshit because the original crime was when she falsified your murder in Florida. Yakutat is a small town, but so easy to escape. Lola can redo everything she’s ever planned. She can hire or even threaten her way around here and start up her ridiculous revenge plot. We need to end it before it starts.”

The brown eyed woman furrowed her eyebrows in confusion as she released herself from Lauren’s hold and quickened her pace to walk beside Lucy as she began questioning. “End it how?” She asked in bewilderment. “Its Lola. She’ll just kill me for good now. You brought me all the way here just so she could do that, right? You’ve been working with her all along. You know I’m a moth-”

Lucy stopped abruptly, reaching out to grab Camila’s wrist in a forceful hold. The woman went to scream before her eyes landed on Lucy’s soft ones. Lucy slowly released Camila, running a distressed hand through her hair before turning to look at Lauren. “I’ve fucked up in the past. So much. I lost the love of my life, I watched as she hurt over someone who was still here, I watched as she raised two amazing independent girls on her own all while trying to manage her own internal heartbreak,” Lucy paused, staring deeply into Lauren’s pale green eyes. “I’ll do anything to amend my wrongs. I’m never going back to the way I use to be. I don’t want to, and I won’t allow myself to. I’m stronger, I’m better and my head is finally going down the right path,” she sighed shakily before turning back to Camila. “The last thing I want is to see get hurt again. I watched on the sidelines for too many goddamn years. I’m gonna make it right this time. Even if it means putting myself away for life.”

Lauren’s eyes widened in horror at the woman’s last sentence. “Lucy, what are you talking about?”

Hot tears stung the corner of Lucy’s eyes as she chewed on her bottom lip. “I’m gonna kill her. I have to,” with that she continued straight forward towards the group of buildings collectively lined up beside each other.

Camila and Lauren shared a regretful stare before quickly following chasing after Lucy.

“You can’t do that,”

“Come on be rational Lucy,”

“We can just go to the cops again,”

“Yeah, we can do that. You can’t ruin your life like tha-”

Suddenly whirling around, fire burned within Lucy’s brown eyes. “Go to the cops? And tell that what? That my crazy step sister is trying to kill the Camila Cabello? Huh? Do you know what’d happen to me?”

Camila stopped, breathing heavily. “Why do you care so much? Huh? Its my life Lucy. Please. Let me handle it.”

Chuckling bitterly to herself, Lucy shook her head. “It may be your life, but you know nothing about mine,” she stared off into the distance before shaking her head once again. “When Lola sends a group of correction officers to gang rape you every fucking day in jail, not being able to fight back because you’ll just be thrown into solitary, then speak to me. Everything isn’t about you.”

“Lu-”

“I’m gonna kill her, with or without you guys here,” Lucy stared them down before turning on her heel and walking away, both Camila and Lauren’s feet basically being glued to the ground as they watched in silent horror.

Camila turned to look at the mother of her children before whispering softly, “What do we do?”

***

a/n: short ass chapter, just a filler for the shit about to go dddoooowwwnnnnn. omg, i know y'all hate me and that i’ve been gone for over five months and i’m sorry. life just happened and idk what else to say really. i’m back now and hopefully i stick around because i truly have missed writing so fuckin much. like a huge ass relief has washed over me because i absolutely love what i do and writing for people.

now welcome back to my world full of angst and drama (; i promise the camren fluff is coming soon. y'all have waited two books for it and it’s gonna be here in a few short chapters.

now, i have a brrraaannnndddd new book out called “one night stand” and its camren ofc. this book was really a spur of the moment type of thing but i already love what i have in store for it so far and i truly think i’m gonna be committed as fuck with this book. yes, it has smut. a lot of it actually. so please go check it out on my page, add it to your library.

of course, amazing cover creds to SLOTHTATO literally their work is fucking phenomenal. best cover maker on all of wattpad, idc, fight me. like look at this (obviously my tumblr readers can’t see it so go add the book in your library on my wattpad @ wthbello because it’s a sexy ass cover).

anyways, yeah, please go check that out. i’ve worked really hard on it and i really like where it’s going. it has angst, but definitely a lot less angst than this story right here. the angst in this is actually way more relatable to real life problems and stuff like that so once again, please go check it out after this.

don’t forget to vote, comment and answer end of the chapter questions below. if you’re a tumblr reading, come follow me on wattpad @ wthbello and add my new camren story 'one night stand’ to your library and read it and vote and comment and all that amazing stuff. thank you so much for reading and i hope you enjoyed.

i’m a sucker for feedback and it’ll help me navigate where to go in the aspects of what my readers will enjoy (if y'all are still here since i’ve been so goddamn MIA lmao) so please answer at least a couple end of the chapter questions to the best of your abilities. again, if you’re from tumblr, head over to my wattpad so you can do that.

what do you think about this chapter?

what do you think will happen next?

how do you feel about lola being out?

how do you feel about lucy being out?

do you think lucy’s bluffing and she’s really working with lola?

where do you think tori and her mom are?

what do you think is/will happen with lauren and camila’s children?

what do you wanna see moving forth?

what are you least worried about?

what are you most worried about?

last but not least, how do you feel about camila’s new music and 5h’s album, lauren’s single, dinah’s feature, and 5h’s collab with pitbull? y'all knew i had to ask this since i haven’t been here since the day before the girls released their album lol.

anyways, thanks so much for reading. i appreciate so much if you’re still for some reason stick around, you have no possible idea how much it means to me and i’m forever grateful for you

#UPDATE #one shot #series #non AU #AU #slash #trigger warning #camren #requested #angst drama #family #humour #romance fluff #submission #our broken white rose

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cas-tellation · 7 years

Text

Not What You Thought (I’m Sorry, I Didn’t Know) part 8

Last chapter - Masterlist - Read on ao3

A/N; Firstly; I just wanted to say that I have this fic pretty much mapped out, BUT there's a big empty space between now and the ending -- just because i need some filler stuff that i can use to add some ~development~ that being said, if you want anything specific to happen in this fic, please, please leave a comment telling me as this is the perfect time for me to maybe fit some of that stuff in. Nothing too big, just lil things. (do you want phil to get a pet? do you want more flashbacks from dan? flashbacks from phil? more about their family & all of that?? literally anything little like that that i can write a little bit about)Secondly; here a playlist of all the music i listen to whilst writing (i mean theres other music i constantly forget to add songs whoops) so if you wanna really ~get in the zone~ whilst readin you can go listen to that if you want i guess here it is And finally; lots of people who read this fic are ftm trans and thats great!! all the feedback that i've gotten back from them is so nice, and im very, very happy that this fic is at least somewhat realistic. I, myself, am not trans, however i am agender (demiboy? idk lol im figuring things out still) so i do have ~some~ experience with dysphoria and all that stuff, but at the same time its also amazing to hear what people say(a huge thanks to everyone's who's left comments on this fic so far... they really are greatly appreciated.)

Dan’s tired. He doesn’t want to get out of bed. Doesn’t want to do much of anything, really. The dysphoria is there; strong as ever. Maybe that’s the thing that he hates the most about himself: The dysphoria. Some people say that they understand that; understand the self hatred that comes with being stuck in the wrong body. But really, how could they, if they were cis?

When his mum claims that everything will be okay and that she understands, and that what he’s going through is something that every teen goes through-- isn’t she lying, because he’s not every teen. He’s Dan, not Yazi. He’s trans, not cis. He doesn’t know anybody who is trans - save for a couple of youtubers that he watches, more for the education aspect of being trans than anything else.

He feels alone. He can’t go to someone. Say, Phil. He couldn’t go to Phil and have the other boy comfort him, and tell him that everything’s going to be okay. Because how would Phil know, if he’s cis? How could Phil possibly know? How could anybody? Sure, they could have little glimpses, but nothing tangible. They wouldn’t feel dysphoria.

They wouldn’t feel this tired.

There’s a certain level of self hatred, but a lot of it was just the dysphoria. It makes him want to physically claw off his own skin.

School is stressful. He feels like he’s falling apart under the pressure of it. He’s doing too much and yet he still feels like he’s not doing enough. He stops doing his homework completely because whenever he hands it in and gets anything less than a perfect score; he feels like he’s failed somehow.

Of course, he hasn’t failed just because he has gotten a lower score, but still.

His mind is constantly messing with him and he’s so tired.

Phil’s embrace is more than welcoming after a long day. Dan melts into his arms, taking a long, shuddering breath and burying his face into Phil’s chest.

Take another deep breath. Now, close your eyes. Feel, where are you?

In, and out, darkness. Phil’s arms, Phil’s body, Phil’s heart, beating slowly and steadily beneath Dan’s cheek, further calming him. Phil’s saying something, maybe asking if Dan’s okay. Or alternatively, what’s wrong.

God, it feels like everything is wrong.

Everything, and it’s all piling up.

It’s too much. It’s all just - too much. He doesn’t know if he can deal with it anymore. He misses the sharp kiss of the blade against his pale skin.

But he’s here in Phil’s arms, safe from physical harm.

Only for the time being. Phil would leave and then - and then.

God.

Since when does the world spin like this? Since when does the world hurt like this?

Phil’s arms are drawing tighter around Dan’s thin body, one hand coming up to comb gently through Dan’s ever-so-slightly curly hair.

“It’ll be okay, Danny,” Phil’s saying.

But the thing is, it doesn’t feel like it’s going to be okay. Because everything hurts but at the same time everything’s so empty and heavy and full and painful. In Dan’s eyes, it’s not going to be okay. Not by a long shot. He feels so broken, and used up, and thoroughly useless.

He’s none of those things.

But his mind refuses to think of himself as anything but that.

Phil’s arms are around him, holding him together. When all Dan is doing is breaking apart.

Phil’s gone. He hadn’t wanted to leave. He’d been worried about Dan. They’re all worried, all the time. Phil, the teachers at school, Dan’s parents.

But Phil had to leave.

And Dan is now alone. Feeling the worst that he has in a long time. And he doesn’t know what to do.

Everything’s hazy. It’s like he’s looking at his life through a keyhole. Not really there. It’s almost as if he can’t feel anything. Is he dreaming? He can’t remember going to sleep but he still doesn’t feel like he’s properly awake. Through a keyhole. Hazy. Dream-like. Sitting on the edge of a bathtub, rolling up his sleeves.

Numb.

A razor, in his hand.

And god is he really going to do this?

Sleep is laced through with unease.

The feeling’s not gone the next day. He had hoped that after a good night’s sleep that the hurt would go away.

He doesn’t know how he’s going to make it through the day.

The binder fits too tight. His hair is growing out a little and it only adds to the dysphoria. Everything feels too feminine. Too much. Way too much. Make it stop, please.

He walks to school, the overcast sky reflecting his emotional state perfectly.

He pauses, in front of the school door, weighing his options.

Then, he turns around and walks in the opposite direction. Fuck school.

He doesn’t go home. God, he doesn’t want to go ‘home’ ever again. He goes to the park instead, where he and Phil had been. Except that now Phil’s not there. Instead, there are countless children and their parents. He almost regrets coming but sits down on the edge of a bench anyway, pulling a book out of his bag and trying to lose himself in the story. At least for a little while.

It’s weird, how invisible he is.

Nobody seems to notice him.

Nobody bothers him.

He almost wishes that he could do this everyday. Until he remembers how much school he’s missing and feels his throat choke up. Too much, this is all too much, and yet not enough.

Phil texts him just after noon, when Dan would usually meet him.

Dan doesn’t reply.

Everything is falling apart at a steady pace and there’s nothing that Dan can do to stop it.

That night, Dan lays in bed, his hands resting on his stomach, tears racing down his cheeks. He thinks, ‘I need Phil’, and then, ‘I need Nicole’, and after that he hates himself a little bit more.

The amount of notifications that Dan wakes up to is absolutely horrifying, in his opinion. Dozens from Phil. Even one from Nicole. He breath catches in his throat as he sees it;

Nic: where have you been ive missed u

He doesn’t know if he can reply to it. He does anyway.

Dan: i miss you too.

And he does. Fuck, he does.

He locks his phone again before he replies to Phil. A sick feeling settles in his belly.

At lunch the next day, Dan’s almost disappointed to see that Phil isn’t yet sitting on the dusty patch of ground behind the building. He pulls out the same book that he had started yesterday, and begins reading. He’s hoping that Phil will show up.

But scared, too, because he’s so unresponsive. He’s scared that Phil will think that Dan doesn’t like him and he’s scared that Phil won’t see how lost Dan is.

But fear isn’t helping him so he pushes it down and tries so hard to focus on the words in front of him. He doesn’t know if it’s working.

Phil does show up. He’s not mad that Dan hadn’t been there the day before, instead, he was worried about how Dan was feeling.

Phil says, “Hey Danny.”

And Dan says, “I told you to stop calling me that.”

And then Phil hugs him again and all Dan can think is: Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. Because what did he do to deserve someone like this? Since when did he get to be with the Good Guy? Since when did someone who actually cared about things pay any sort of attention to him?

Usually it was someone looking for a good fuck.

Or Nicole, who simply didn’t have her life together enough to care.

Dan lets Phil hold him and is scared that Phil will leave once he realizes how well and truly fucked up Dan feels.

Feeling good is something that takes a long time. Dan feels a spark of it that night when Phil texts him saying:

Phil: Goodnight dannyyyyyyy <3333

The spark being Dan’s stomach flopping around happily. Happily. Happiness. It’s something that he has a hard time feeling.

But with Phil, it seems to come easier.

Dan wakes up feeling a bit more awake than usual. He tells himself that this means he’s getting over the depression, though he can still feel it lurking there, right under his skin, waiting for the worst time to make it’s re-appearance.

It’s horrible, living like this, but at the point that Dan is now at, it’s impossible to avoid.

#phanfic #phanfiction #myfics #ftmtrans #ftm #trans!dan #phan fluff #phan angst #phan smut #phan

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johnnys-so · 7 years

Note

May I please request a college or uni senior Hyuk scenario? Thank youuu

A/N: I have three other hyuk scenarios other than this oh god im channeling all of my inner hyuk. i had to watch ridiculous hyuk videos on youtube just to get his character right. But so worth it.

uni senior hyuk would be the kind of guy that everyone knew of but nobody really knows him. do you know what i mean? he’s way more approachable than the 4th year senior hyungs like leo, n and ken but definitely not as self revealing as anyone would like

i imagine hyuk as a physics major, something related to science or architecture most definitely. he’s definitely got the brains for it. He also seems like the kind of student who makes it to the dean’s list or becomes the class representative or the vice president of a club. and even if he isn’t constantly in leader positions, he is very respectful and kind to his professors, which makes them all the more inclined to give him assistant positions and that’s how you first met him.

hyuk had walked into your class as a sophomore and you were immersed in the new book you were reading. he had casually passed on some announcement about assignments from the professor and walked out of class just as quickly, except he ran back into the class and straight to you, to mention that the professor had asked you to meet them. much like hyuk, the profs were kind enough to take you up for research and assistant positions when in need

you didn’t realise what was happening but this very bright senior with his black hair falling into his eyes was asking you if you understood what you had just said. honestly? you didn’t hear a word. the protagonist of the novel in front of you was too interesting to focus on the real world but you were sure whatever hyuk was saying was important. but just as you had gotten up the courage (and mind) to ask him to repeat himself, he was already out of the class. but ofcourse the girls around you had to make a big deal out of it. they mused about everything from his hair to his clothes o his hotness to how cool he was. all you could remember was that he strangely smelled like petrichor. and you loved it

you forget to actually ask him again and let the matter go until a week later when the professor meets you directly and asks you why you haven’t been showing up at the meetings?

wait what???

meetings???

and thats when the prof mentions that you were invited to a fairly exclusive club about research and were invited to the dean’s dinner! (im literally just making it up as we go im so sorry)

you finally make it to the club meeting only to realise that you’ve missed a series of them and hyuk’s the one leading it. just as you enter, he rushes you to just sit down and catch up and goes on and on about whatever they were discussing earlier. to be fair, you were utterly lost.

so you wait until everyone’s left, literally shaking in your chair from the nerves and slowly get up to talk to hyuk. hyuk looks goddamn amazing, you have to agree. he always wore comfortable tshirts or oversized hoodies or sweaters to college and that just made him all the more handsome. he had a very effortless beauty to himself that you couldn’t help but admire. if you weren’t so stressed with uni work and the idea of having missed out so many meetings because you FORGOT TO ASK HIM AGAIN, you would have actually admired the way his long fingers effortlessly arranged the papers on the desk into a neat pile. or the way one corner of his sweater was always lodged into the belt of his pants. or his nervous habit of biting his lips when he was distracted with work

but instead, you walk up behind him and begin slowly, “umm excuse me…” and hyuk literally WHIRLS around. hyuk has the grace of a tycoon tbh and he nearly knocks you out but thankfully, he grips your shoulders to balance you and you’re a bit shocked because you just went from nervous wreck to in startling close space with the cute uni senior dear lORD HELP YOU

“right haha sorry about that. how can i help you???/”

“sO… im extremely sorry but i have missed quite a few of these meetings -”

“yeah i noticed”

“-and its entirely my fault idk what ive been thinking -”

“no no its ok”

“–but im just super sorry and id love to help but everything you say goes over my head and i know i should get it god im sorry but -”

and by now hyuk’s heard you apologize for a complete set of 10 times since you entered the room and he is trying real hard to stifle a laugh but you make it so hard because you’re so cute and your hands are curling into a grasp and he desperately wants to straighten them out like the pile of neat papers on the desk behind him so he kinda does (this boi i mean)

he reaches out for your hands and holds them in his and stares at them almost wistfully as he says “you’ve got to stop this bad habit of starting with an apology” and when he looks up he nearly wants to kiss the living daylights out of you because the sun outside is setting and you’re in one of the oldest rooms of your uni and with the winter cold, you seem like the warmest most delicious thing in the room

so he puts all his effort into putting his hands into his pockets and offers to help you catch up with the meetings personally

what follows is a series of cafe dates where you both catch up on all the plans for the upcoming exhibition (think of it like a summit of sorts) and you realize he relies a lot on you for decisions and occasionally stops to hear what you think about his ideas so far

the dates begin as a very formal thing with both of you dressing very well and maintaining a respectful distance and only ever opting for the occasional coffee. but after the 4th or 5th meet you decide to try different coffees and your clothes become more relaxed with you turning up in your favorite sweater dress and your hair in a messy bun and your smile light and easy.

from there, you hit it off so well. though you’re all caught up he stlil offers to show you this one restaurant he really loves and “you’ve GOT to try the food you will CRY BECAUSE ITS SO GOOD” and you’re always up for a good challenge so you meet up for dinner after all your classes in your hoodies and stuff yourselves with food and drinks and chat late into the night.

by now both of you are very sure you’re attracted to each other because fuck how can you try and ignore him when he looks so good and he was definitely sure he lost all self control when you turned up so messy and bright in that sweater dress.

but its the dean’s dinner that does you in he shows up in the crisp white shirt, dress pants and a vest and you nearly lose it with his hair swept up like that and you’re in a cocktail dress and he can think of a 100 things to do with you and none of them should be spoken about in respectful company

and when the night draws on the old croak is making some stupid comments about his accomplishments in life that both of you could care less about, he whispers lazily “i cant wait to get out of these clothes” and you absent-mindedly reply “you look way better in comfortable clothing anyway” and he cheekily says “i half expected you to offer some help removing the clothes” and he doesn’t expect your answer but then

“i could. do you wanna leave and let me try?”

and thats how you end up in his apartment after sneaking out of the dinner with both your clothes lying on the floor and he’s kissing you like his life depends on it and maybe it kinda does because he literally ditched the dean for you wow

but after a solid make out session (and other things *ahem*) the rain is pouring cats and dogs outside and you get into one of hyuk’s huge shirts and he’s wearing just his track pants and the both of you are just sitting by the window, nursing a hot mug of coffee and listening to old songs and occasionally hyuk leans in to smell your neck and kisses the base of your throat and you realise

you’re uni life just got a whole of a lot better

YOU ARE WELCOME.

#hyuk #vixx #hyuk imagines #vixx imagines #uni!vixx

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sadrien · 7 years

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Ok so YES I love the long distance internet friends au but consider! Long distance wrong number au

honestly anon, thank you so much for this tonight.

i took long distance and made it loooooong distance to the point where it probably doesn’t make sense, but ~~suspension of disbelief~~

texts between adrien and the mystery person (wow i wonder who) are in italics because theyre in french. also i didnt want to bother anyone so ‘numéro inconnu’ is from google translate so im sorry for….that

finally i tried to streamline how i do texts for this just because the way i do texts is usually a lot clunkier? so it looks more like wanna chat but isnt in like….the contact names are still what the other person would see? like when it says pretty boy thats ninos contact name for adrien and—

frick just tell me if its too confusing and tell me how to fix it im really tired

[on ao3 in case the read more is a butt and wont open]

2:51 PM unknown number: Did this work????? unknown number: a;slkdfjadj its me btw unknown number: I mean duh its me who else would it be unknown number: If you screenshot this conversation al I swear to go d Ill kill you

Adrien squints at his phone. Not only does he not know this number, but the text are in French. That’s…unusual. He thinks that it’s a lucky coincidence that his father is from France and insisted he learned the language before replying.

2:52 PM numéro inconnu: I think you might have the wrong number. numéro inconnu: Sorry if my French is bad I don’t speak it often and I write it even less

unknown number: Ohmogd unknown number: IM SOSO RRY IDNT MEAN OT unknown number: AHHHHH I MUSTCE TYPED IT IN WRONG???????? unknown number: Im sorry IM osrry Im sorry Im s orry Im sorry!!!!!!!!!! ; ^ ;

It takes Adrien a minute to translate the texts with the typos. He’s not nearly as fluent as he thought he was. His dad will be thrilled about that. Maybe he needs to mention to Nathalie that starting Chinese has left him a little rusty with his French…

Not that this is going to be a thing. Because it’s not. He’s not going to keep texting some random stranger from— Wait a minute.

2:54 PM numéro inconnu: On the off chance of sounding really stalkery numéro inconnu: (I’m not sure if that’s the right word, I had to use Google Translate) numéro inconnu: Do you live in France?

Yup. That question is just as creepy as it sounded in his head. Adrien spins slowly in his chair as he waits for a response, completely disregarding the homework he needs to have done before he leaves for fencing.

2:57 PM unknown number: Ummm unknown number: I dont know if i should be telling you this random stranger I texted by accident unknown number: But seeing that its a big country unknown number: ANd idk how youd find me to like murder me or something unknown number: Yes. Im from France unknown number: Why??

3:01 PM numéro inconnu: It’s just that numéro inconnu: I live in the United States so… numéro inconnu: I’m trying to figure out how you got a wrong number that…wrong numéro inconnu: That sounded mean I’m sorry!!!!!!!

Adrien puts down his phone and groans. Scaring people off from literally an ocean away. He’s always known he’s not the greatest at socializing but this is some next level shit. He stares at his darkened phone screen for a minute before deciding that whoever he’s been texting is probably extremely weirded out and won’t be replying.

He’s strangely disappointed by that.

And while he could go back to doing physics work, he’s not going to. Because now he’s distracted and he doesn’t really want to be thinking about sound waves right now. Maybe in like fifteen minute, because sound waves are cool and add a whole new layer to music that he kind of loves, but not right this second.

The next time his chair spins past the desk, he grabs his phone and pulls up his conversation with Nino.

3:09 PM pretty boy: Have you ever been texted by someone who has the wrong number before?

duuuude: yup duuuude: it was weird af duuuude: didnt turn into a full convo cause they never responded

pretty boy: What did they send?

duuuude: a rad horse painting and the message ‘jen painted another horse’

pretty boy: Ok wow yeah that is kind of weird

duuuude: yeah i didnt respond duuuude: but then the next day they asked about florida?? and flooding??? and were like yo have you seen or called anyone and i was like oh shit i should probably respond because this seems important incase theyre looking for someone

pretty boy: Yeah that sounds like a smart move pretty boy: Did you ever hear back from them

duuuude: nah duuuude: unfortunate too i wouldve loved to see more horse drawings duuuude: anyway that was kinda a random question any reason why you ask?

pretty boy: I got a text from a wrong number pretty boy: From France

duuuude: what the fuck duuuude: bruh international texting fees duuuude: good thing youre rich my dude

pretty boy: Nah it’s ok it was all iMessage

duuuude: bless duuuude: so was it like duuuude: in french

pretty boy: Yup

duuuude: aw man you lucked out duuuude: is it like a full conversaiton??

pretty boy: Idk they haven’t responded in like 15 minutes pretty boy: It was nice while it lasted

duuuude: :/ rip

Adrien blinks in surprise when a notification from the unknown number pops up at the top of the screen. He clicks it immediately, not even reading any of the text before he does.

3:27 PM unknown number: I dont?????? KNow???????????? unknown number: My friend got a new phone and wrote her number on my arm but her writing is always kinda a mess and also I smudged the numbers because IM a mess and I unknown number: Somehow???? unknown number: PLUS I managed to add the us country code????

numéro inconnu: Well I’m pretty sure that’s just a 1 so that’s understandable

unknown number: And any other numbers I needed??? Hwo did I?? unknown number: I don t know how I did it D: unknown number: Ohmy god and I just realized you probably dont want a million texts from a total stranger in a language you barely speak?? unknown number: IM SO SORRY ILL STOP NOW unknown number: YOU SEEM REALLY NICE SORRY FOR WASTING YORU TIME unknown number: OK BYE

3:36 PM numéro inconnu: It’s fine! numéro inconnu: My dad is actually from Paris so I do know French numéro inconnu: I can’t really say I’m totally fluent in it but I spoke it a lot when I was little numéro inconnu: This is good practice! numéro inconnu: And you’re weren’t wasting my time at all, I promise

Good going, Agreste, he thinks to himself. Over enthusiastic and weird. He tries not to think about it too much and goes back to physics. Physics with its constant equations and complex numbers and waves and waves and waves and waves. It gets a little easier when he’s able to connect it to something he knows. He can hear frequency in his music and beats when he tries to tune instruments. He finds his fingers itching to spread across the black and white piano keys and lose themselves in the music.

By the time Nathalie is calling him for fencing, he’s mostly forgotten about the conversation he had with the stranger across the sea. Not entirely, it’s still in the back of his mind, but he’s moved past the disappointment of likely never speaking to them again. While he’s fencing, his mind has no room for those thoughts and he throws them away. He won’t be needing them again.

When Adrien checks his phone after practice for schedule updates from Nathalie or texts about the weekend from Nino, he finds a single text in French at the bottom of his pile of notifications.

He can’t stop himself from smiling as he opens it. He’s not exactly sure what time it is in France right now, he assumes it’s fairly late and doesn’t expect a response anytime soon, but he replies quickly anyway. His reply is short and simple, but he doesn’t know what else to say, so it’ll have to be enough for now.

Maybe this is a one time thing. Maybe it isn’t. He’d like it to be the latter, but right now, he’s just winging it.

4:02 PM unknown number: Well if youre really really sure… I mean I wouldnt be talking to you often obviously!!! But it might be cool to know more about America? Ive always wanted to visit and wow this probably is super weird and Im so sorry for that like this conversation hasnt been weird enough already ahahahhhhhhhhh but um. I just mean to say that if you wanted to maybe keep talking I wouldnt mind?

5:19 PM numéro inconnu: I’d love to keep talking if you want to! :)

#Anonymous #Thanks from the Argo!#adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #nino lahiffe #my fics #i shouldve gone to bed an hour ago i feel like total garbage

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xladymalice · 7 years

Text

Time to answer SOME Asks! xD - Part 2

Let’s put this sweetie at the top of the ask-replies. I kind of don’t want to hide him x’D <3

Anon 18: Working on sin currently too. But it takes freaking time. So much time. Just take this random doodle that I haven’t uploaded so far:

That’s how you get Pup horny btw. That’s a critical hit for him.

Welp.. there’s a ton more asks.. let’s go on then... hahaha....

@blackroses113sin18 Don’t be jelly D: it’s never good to be jelly! (Except for food, then I’ll take you and eat you up) Oh dear.. then you’re a veteran cookie or the like. It’s always great to read that some of you started to follow me just right when I started to join the Undertale fandom. I’m filled with determination and delight to see that I actually managed to hold your interest so far. I guess I’m doing a good job then. Thanks alot sweetie! I’m always trying to improve on my art and the more I draw these skellies the better I get. Like.. my very first attemps were so much harder and they didn’t seem right to me. I had to find my own style and in the end I’m kind of okay with it now. I don’t draw super cute and fluffy stuff.. my style has never been one of these cutie ones. I always do worry that I don’t do good or that I draw skellies super weird in comparison to others (as I said: my Sanses are bigger than “the mainstream” ones... ha) Lemme smooch and love you. When I read this ask you really brighten up my day. Sometimes I feel down and this one really did good on cheering me up. Thanks alot!

@soraya-chan Hm, I need to be in the mood of drawing something else tbh. I think the most cookies and random dudes should know by now that I’m super obsessed with Swapfell and Underswap. You maybe did notice it: I did draw some Underfell too and even Fellcest in some way. I do like the Fellbros, but my love is rather focused on Fellpaps than Red here. I will have to disappoint you again, dear ^^ I’m not interested in many other characters of Undertale other than the skeles. And in general no GrillbyxSans. I do watch stuff like that and accept it, but I won’t draw it myself. (I really need a good reason for that.)

I’m trying to consider other characters but... I would waste my time and strength on things I don’t like? That doesn’t make any sense for me and four you either. Pic’s look always trashy if I don’t want to draw it. Of course I could force myself, but where’s the point? If people want to see explicit couples they can commission me to do it. Commissions have a complete other motivation for me since I want to make this crazy supporter happy who likes my stuff this much. Sure, I do look at suggestions, but I’d rather take suggesteions into consideration that aim at my favorite skellies, which are Swapfell right now. (Underswap and even Underfell will be still part of) Thanks for your understanding :)

@vixenredfox HECK YEAH. I love him too D: like wtf, I’m so thirsty for him.. I need more yandere sfpap with me. Especially my possessive, crazy asshole... fckkk Glad my art does make you happy!

Anon 14: Makes absolutely sense anon. It’s almost losing the fun how many people want to hug my Swapfell Bro’s, are too scared or act like they’re not dangerous at all. Welp, try to hug them. You’ve seen how angry both can get. So uh.. I think it’s not good to piss of any of them. If you do something they don’t like automatically both will be mad. They are deeply connected to each other and they don’t like seeing the other angry. So both woul attack the one who annoys them, y’know? No fun game there :D

Anon 15: Working on it D: please be patieeeeent

Anon 16: Hah, you should see him if Pup does make him laugh for real. Then you’ll die a thousands of happy deaths. I mean.. ok ok.. at the x-mas special we got close to his genuine smile.

He loves his brother truly after all <3

Anon 17: No shit. A pile of bones that manage to get me horny. That’s just sick. I’m thirsty for fucking skeletons. Possessive ones. Who are basically freaks and psychos. I need some therapyst... but I’m sure nothing will help me to get out of this mess... (It’s still a pain to draw them ‘naked’ ...)

@flamefiends I hope you sweet, sweet cookie did see my newest comic “Dangerous Move”. Then you can fangirl some more over that freak. Gosh, I’m a sucker for psycho Pup.

@lulumoonprincess Heh, you will see some. But it also take times... like.. it’s a nsfw comic I’m working on and sometimes I’ve got troubles with drawing stuff like that. I don’t want to present tons of shit D:

Anon 19: You wanna fite me, cookie? We can do this right in front of all. Welp, we’ll see if you get what you want or go crying in a corner ;p

Anon 20: Hmm... maybe if I’m in the freaking mood for it :D good smut doesn’t happen forced! It’s rather sudden and boom!

Anon 21: You sure, Anon?

I think he could have anyone if he’d be interested~~~

Anon 22: Uh..uh.. don’t compliment me so much.. I’m really not this good with compliments... uhh... Q///Q Thank you sooooo much, Anon! I don’t know why you’re so shy to write me, but let me smooch you and overwhelm you with lots of love. My heart was all warm and fuzzy. I am always happy to read stuff like this... There are honestly times I feel that followers don’t really look at my art and postings in general. I know that not everyone is that interested in the artist himself but the comic and shit. Hearing that you went through my galery means alot to me! I hope I can make your day a bit better with each post by me!

@babypizzawonderland Roger that! I’m alwas on duty to create some random, but complex art! Mwehehe! Thanks dear <3

@luckydazephantom Hehe~ I’m listening to a lot of stuff. But usually it’s rock. I am terribly in love with Skillet, Three Days grace, Linking park. There are so many great bands. I even like some german rock bands, altough I usually prefer the english ones. So... uh... (some of the music I listen to is from AMVs. So uh.. deal with it. xD)

This. This. This This. Maybe This. This. Uhhh.. sometimes I’m super into nightcore. Maybe this.

@marookooart The question is what kind of ghost and why does it want to smooch me? How can I even smooch a ghost? I would fall through him right? xD

Anon 23: It’s always weird to read that I am suddenly the fav tumblr of someone... gosh, stop making me blush here. You’re welcome dear! That author is freaking amazing, you should try to read her other fics too! They’re reaaaally good!

Anon 24: Interesting question you’ve got there. I was confused a little since there’s still room to mix shit up... and sometimes I’m too stupid to read the things right. So.. if Pup would see Blue crying he would probably not care at first. However... looking into that teary face would remind him of something he really cares about. So he still would go there and check on him and MAYBE even comfort him like he did in xSympathy. He might be an asshole but he has a soft, weak spot for this one skele. And Blueberry does remind him alot of that special one. After all... SWAPfell has similiar traits with the Swaps~

Anon 25: Ohh I see. But.. but... it is really that interesting to see me freak out and hype stuff? xD Aren’t you bothered by my own fangirling or something???? Hahaha. I could talk about the fic too, if people want to discuss it. Usually I’m pampering my sweet muse on her AO3 account with comments or PM her. That’s where I really freak out and flood her with thoughts and feelings. Gosh, sometimes I do worry that I annoy her...... x’D I do tend to talk lots of trash and weird things, if I’m into something hahaha. But well, I kind of feel honored that someone is this interested in my opinion. I rather thought it would be boring for others to know or stuff... since talk is not as interesting as some picture for the most? Idk... You’ll see my excitement soon enough again XD

#mali answers stuff #xsympathy theory #anon asks #that's enough for today #it's around 3:30 am #time for bed #hahaha #RIP mali

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