#i would be happy to sink $40 a month into that just for the joy it would give me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

edie-baby · 3 years

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to have and to hold | juri vips

summary: Juri Vips was a bastard of a teammate. Mostly just because you were insanely in love with him and his flirtatious ways. Juri senses a change in your behaviour and when things begin going back to normal, Juri just fucks it up again. (Similar premise to the Mr & Mrs imagine with Liam, but different[?])

word count: 2894

warnings: swearing, still. i don't think i should have to put warnings about swearing anymore, it's basically a given.

Working with Juri Vips was a fucking trainwreck. There was no light way to put it, it was messy, it was painful, and yet you could never stop fucking staring at him. Being his teammate in F2 for the past year and a half, the two of you had gotten quite close, to the point where his family invited you on vacation with them when they were going, and you had joined them once, but realised about two hours in, that it was a thinly veiled attempt from literally his entire family to get the two of you together.

And while you were all for it, being forced to spend so much time with Juri, while he was shirtless nonetheless, was a literal dream come true, it was also incredibly painful for you to stop from pouncing on him at any given moment. Because as much as his family thought there was something between you, it was purely Juri’s charisma and character to be almost constantly flirting with you.

You remember the first time the two of you, a few other F2 drivers had come along as well, had gone to the beach and he had seen you bust out the bikini you knew made you look like a hot piece, he hadn’t shut up about it, or you, for weeks afterwards.

“Well look at you, little miss supermodel. I would have thought you’d be walking catwalks with legs like that, not pushing pedals like the rest of us. God, you look like you just stepped out of my dreams and onto this beach. If you keep looking like that, I think I might have a problem to deal with later in the shower.” He had hollered, and many of the guys around you either joined in or had nothing to say but gawk. Juri’s comments had cemented themselves in your brain however, calling back upon them whenever you felt less than top dollar, which you had to admit was becoming more often in recent months.

Juri had noticed your slowly waning confidence, of course he had. His gorgeous view of you in crop tops, little skirts, and tight shorts had turned into oversized shorts, hoodies, and ill-fitting jeans. All of which still made you the most beautiful girl in the world, but there was something missing from your aura, a general happiness that had been lacking since the new season started a few months ago. In the entire time Juri had known you, you were never one to listen to other’s opinions of you, whether they be good or bad, the only people you had ever listened to and taken words to heart from were himself, your parents, and your boyfriend.

Somehow in the span of about three minutes, Juri had tracked the four most likely culprits of your diminished ego. He knew he hadn’t said anything harmful or damaging to you since the season began, as many of your conversations had revolved around racing, other drivers in the paddock, or your family. Your parents, he was confident in, he had met them many times before, and they were always genuinely warm and welcoming, he supposed there might have been another side to them, though he believed he would have picked up on it by now. Which leaves only your boyfriend, whom Juri had zero confidence in.

Tye was nice, almost disgustingly so, but he was also much too proud of being nice for it to be genuine. He would open car doors for you, give you flowers every few months, and once bought you a necklace with a pendant of his name. But you would never forget that he did those things for you, because as soon as you would mention something relatively negative, those few acts of kindness were shoved down your throat.

Juri, of course, was not privy to that information. All he knew was that Tye’s possessive behaviour and complete lack of care for your wishes meant that there was something beneath the surface Juri was sure was the reason for your confidence, or lack thereof.

So when you came into work one day, to continue shooting some videos for the YouTube channel, wearing a gorgeously fitted pair of jeans, and a halter-neck singlet, Juri knew something was afoot. Also notable was your lack of gold necklace and your beaming smile toward the Estonian.

“You gonna keep staring like that, or do you want to take a photo?” You asked, your voice holding the teasing lilt Juri had missed in the past weeks. Without breaking his gaze from your body, Juri reached into the pocket of his shorts, his hand retrieving his phone and taking a photo of you standing there, tight clothes and bright smile in all its glory. He smirked when he saw your barely concealed smile.

“You’re in a much better mood than usual. What happened?” Juri couldn’t help but ask, the drastic shift in your mood was more than intriguing to him. Your smile widened, taking the last few steps toward his position in a chair behind the large conference table.

“I lost 80 kilos last night.” You whispered, leaning in closer to Juri, the glint in your eyes, the proximity and the tone were all so familiar to him that he couldn’t help but meet you halfway, barely three inches between your faces as the words processed in his mind.

Juri glanced down at your body confusedly, trying to figure out where exactly the 80kg had disappeared from. Then, the pieces began clicking into place. The lack of gold necklace, the tighter clothes, the glowing smile, none of which would have been staring Juri in the face if Tye had a say.

“You dumped Tye?” Juri questioned, his eyes lighting up, his raise in volume betraying just how excited he was for you, and himself. You nodded, eyes softening as you watched the pure joy cross Juri’s face. Him being happy was something that always warmed your heart, but Juri being happy about you finally being happy? You were sure your knees were about to buckle.

“I’m glad. I can have you all to myself now.” Juri grumbled, reaching for your hands that were braced against the arms of his chair. With a sharp tug, your balance was offset, and your body was tumbling toward Juri’s. You landed with a giggle in Juri’s lap, his own laughter joining yours and the two of you simply enjoyed each other’s presence after having an intangible wall built between you during your relationship with Tye.

Juri couldn’t hold a taken woman like he loved her, not when that taken woman wasn’t his to hold. And you, how could you revel in the feel of man’s touch that was anyone’s but the man you supposedly loved. You couldn’t break out in goosebumps, or have a shiver roll down your spine when you felt the familiar pressure of his calloused fingertips pressing into the skin of your back, desperate to keep you close. You weren’t allowed to sigh in content when you felt the warmth of his body seep into your skin, or whimper when his hot breath rolled over the skin of your neck.

But now you could. Now, without the moral implications of enjoying another man, you could sink into this all-consuming feeling you have when Juri is near.

“Morning you two. We’ve got a video to film in the garage if you want to follow me?” The social media manager, Georgina, a lovely woman in her 40s whom you always went to for advice and style tips, poked her head into the room you and Juri were tangled in, a cheeky smile on her face when she spotted the somewhat compromising position. A blush fell heavy on your cheeks, and you were quick to try and scramble away from Juri.

He had other ideas though. When Juri began moving, you clutched onto him for dear life, terrified of falling to the ground even though it was only about two feet. Your arms circled around his neck, your legs fully wrapping around his hips from where you were straddling him on the chair. His large hands came to rest on the underside of your thighs, hoisting you up higher on his body. Your legs clenched around his middle, the feel of his fingers pushing into the soft skin of your legs was electrifying, and you were sure if you didn’t have a video to film, you would have been telling the Estonian to find an unoccupied office to take what he needed from you.

But alas, you had a job to do. So, still wrapped around Juri like a vice, he carried you through the Hitech office, nodding to other staff you passed, and occasionally nuzzling his nose into your neck to get a good whiff of your perfume. Juri had said multiple times the scent was intoxicating and could bring any man to his knees. You may have gone out and bought an extra bottle to ensure you never ran out after that.

After a few minutes, you stepped into the garage with Juri, well, he stepped in you just kind of floated in. The scent of grease, rubber and a slight hint of fuel invaded your nostrils, and you sighed in content. Juri chuckled at your actions, he always loved watching you step into a garage, or out onto the pit lane to take in the smells of burnt rubber. You told him every time he laughed at you that it evoked a calm feeling within you, it was nostalgic, filled with happy memories from your childhood and the memories of races you shared with Juri on track.

“Alright lovebirds, can we get you in these chairs and we’ll start explaining while we finish getting set up.” Georgina stated, smiling fondly at the love between her two youngsters. Juri sat you down in one of the chairs sitting before the cameras, not leaving your side for long as he planted himself in his own chair and dragged you as close as possible.

Georgina explained the rules of the game, and the way you would be playing it, choosing you to sit in the background listening to music whilst Juri answered questions about you. First, they gave you a list of questions about yourself, asking to circle the correct answers and they would be compared to Juri’s during the game.

“Ok Juri, the first question. How old was Y/N when she started karting?” Georgina questioned. She watched you in the background closely to ensure you couldn’t hear anything, but you were blissfully unaware of everything around you, headphones in your ears, legs tucked up on the chair, scrolling through your phone with the occasional giggle escaping your lips. Each time Juri heard the angelic sound, he would turn to look at you with a look so soft it made the entire team’s heart swell.

“Uh, I think she was 10, I know she started late because she had to argue with her parents to let her do it with her brothers, and I think 10 is about the right age.” Juri answered, looking as though he was thinking quite hard about it. It had been a long time since the two of you discussed your start in karting, it was one of the first conversations you had together, and since then you hadn’t had to talk about generic teammate topics. Juri was proud that he remembered something seemingly insignificant from a year and a half ago, but supposed when it came to you he could never forget a thing.

“Alright, next question. What is Y/N’s biggest fear? Is it A, the ocean, B, goblins, or C, heights?” Juri’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head when he heard the second answer, trying to figure out why it was even an option in the first place. His eyes focused on one spot on the floor, his brain moving a mile a minute to analyse conversations he had with you.

“Well, we’ve been to the beach together a few times, and thinking back I don’t think she’s ever gotten into the water. So maybe the ocean, but she also said once when we were looking at a castle that she doesn’t like gargoyles, so goblins could be a thing. But she’s definitely not scared of heights. She’s gone skydiving, bungee jumping and climbed bridges and things like that. So I’m going to say the ocean. I feel like I would definitely know if she was scared of something like goblins.” Juri laughed, his eyes still glued to the spot on the floor, his thoughts flowing through his mouth with little consideration of how they could be interpreted.

“What is something Y/N never leaves the house with?” Georgina was hopeful for this question, she was sure it could be the catalyst for the two drivers to finally own up to their feelings after reading your answer. Juri listened to the multiple choice answers, but none of them sounded just right.

“So, the rings sound the closest, but sometimes she will wear lots, and other times only a few, and when she can’t wear them on her hands, she’ll thread it onto a necklace to wear under her race suit, or something so yeah, I’d say the rings.” Juri answered, turning to look at you behind him, wearing the exact ring he was talking about on the ring finger of your right hand.

“And what ring is the one she wears on her necklace?” Georgina probed, knowing the answer and just wanting to see the way Juri heated up when he talked about it.

“Uh, it’s a diamond ring that has a J engraved on the inside.” Juri answered, his cheeks turning an adorable shade of pink. A smile broke out on your face as you watched Juri, his flustered state always made you giggle as he was such a confident and put-together person usually. As a habit, you began spinning the ring on your right hand around, feeling the shape of the diamonds and knowing the initial carved into the inside was a claim over you.

“Do you know where she got it?” Georgina asked. She was getting frustrated, Juri was much more calm about revealing the intimacy of the ring than she had hoped.

“I gave it to her. About a year ago, and then she gave me a necklace with an (your initial) on it. I wear it every day, and it’s the only piece of jewellery I wear while I drive.” Juri answered, his fingers reaching up to toy with the thin gold chain hidden beneath his shirt. He looked over his shoulder at you, spotting the spinning ring immediately and smiling at you.

You looked up at him, a dazed look as you stared at the gorgeous man in front of you. He could see the stars in your eyes, staring at him as though he hung the moon, and if he was honest with himself, if you asked, he would. There was nothing you could ask of him that would be too much, even if you didn’t ask, he would do everything for you. No one had ever held this power over him, he wasn’t even sure it would feel this good if it were anyone else, but you just did something to him. You unlocked a part of him he didn’t know existed.

You were just, everything. To him. You were everything he ever wanted, ever needed, even everything he didn’t know he needed. You opened him up, poured sunshine into his life in the form of your smile, happiness penetrated his bones because of your laugh. He didn’t want to lose that again, didn’t want to lose you to another man. He needed you, and he needed you now.

It was like slow motion, the way Juri surged out of his chair toward you, his hands cupping your jaw roughly as he guided you to your feet. The laptop on the ground pulled the earphones from your ears, your phone clattering to the floor in your surprise. Your hands reached up to fist in his shirts, not wanting to lose this proximity. You had him in your grasp and you’d be damned if you ever let him go again.

Juri pressed his lips to yours, as soft and warm as you’d imagined them so many times before. You kissed him back with ferocity, the eighteen months worth of emotion poured into a kiss to communicate your feelings in a way that didn’t need words. He kissed back just as fiercely, his hands holding your face still to allow him to do exactly what he needed. You were pliable to his every demand, putty in his hands. Juri had always had this effect on you, every fleeting touch or brush of a hand on your waist made your knees weak and your stomach flutter with the force of a thousand butterflies.

Juri pulled away, barely a breath between your lips as he panted slightly. Your eyes were trained on his lips, the fullness of his bottom lip, the redness from your assault on them making them look all the more kissable.

“So, how about we switch that ring to the other hand and really make this a Mr & Mrs video?”

#juri vips #juri vips imagine #juri vips fanfic #juri vips x reader #f2 2021 #formula 2 #f2 fanfic #hitech gp

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casual-video-transcripts · 2 years

Video

youtube

Trans Mermaid & Coming Out | Dreamsounds

Transcript by CCKN is under the cut

[0:00] Marlene (pre-transition): A little over three years ago I began this channel

[0:02] and I haven’t be honest.

[0:05] Well, I mean I a-actually scratch that.

[0:07] I don’t think that’s true.

[0:08] A little over three years ago I began this channel

[0:10] and since then I understand myself a lot better.

[0:14] I don’t think I was being dishonest in my earlier videos

[0:17] I just didn’t have the right tools and vocabulary to know what I was feeling

[0:21] I shared my feelings as I understood them back then.

[0:24] I went to Disneyland Paris at the beginning of February,

[0:26] and it was weird.

[0:28] On one hand it was incredibly cool to celebrate three years of the channel

[0:31] and be there to work on a video about Disney queerness and the American dream,

[0:35] but I also knew it was the end of an era.

[0:37] I knew that as soon as I got home

[0:39] I would begin truly taking my life into my own hands.

[0:43] Marlene (post-transition): So let’s talk about mermaids and why I’m a woman now.

[0:48] [“Part of Your World” piano cover by Jon Michael Ogletree]

[1:04] A few months ago I shaved,

[1:07] instead of just trimming my beard

[1:11] I was shaving my whole body

[1:13] I took some photos in the mirror and sent a text to my husband John

[1:15] saying it was the last call for my old name.

[1:18] In truth, I knew that wasn’t really the case.

[1:22] For most people, I would still be my old name

[1:24] while I transitioned in my private

[1:26] but from that point on,

[1:28] it was all a performance by me, Marlene,

[1:31] and that is my real name

[1:34] while shaving, I put the album, Howard Sings Ashman, on in the background

[1:38] and when it got to his demo of “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid

[1:41] I looked in the mirror and started crying.

[1:44] His beautiful lyrics and Alan Menken’s unforgettable music hit me all at once.

[1:49] After a decade of boring myself in

[1:52] beards, in hair, and masculinity,

[1:55] I finally saw me.

[1:57] But I quickly started laughing.

[1:59] What was emotional became absurd,

[2:02] like I finally found the glasses that were on my face the whole time.

[2:06] Oh! There I was.

[2:08] In “Part of Your World,” Ariel sings about wanting to be a human.

[2:11] After obsessing over human objects for such a long time,

[2:15] she decides that she’s had enough.

[2:17] Even though she’s told not go to the surface, she can’t help it.

[2:20] She literally comes from underwater royalty,

[2:22] but that doesn’t matter.

[2:24] She’s not happy.

[2:26] Marlene (singing): 🎶 I’ve got gadgets and gizmos a-plenty 🎶

[2:30] 🎶 I’ve got who zits and whatzits galore 🎶

[2:34] 🎶 You want thingamabobs? 🎶

[2:37] 🎶 [Well] I’ve got twenty 🎶

[2:40] 🎶 But who cares? 🎶

[2:43] 🎶 No big deal 🎶

[2:46] 🎶 I want more! 🎶

[2:51] Marlene (talking): I married John in 2019

[2:53] and it was one of the happiest days of my life

[2:55] but it was also complicated.

[2:57] I flew to New York so we could get married at city hall in Manhattan

[3:00] and afterwards we went to take photos in Fort Tyron Park, the place where we first met

[3:04] but that afternoon I felt like something was wrong.

[3:08] I looked at the photos and I felt intense joy

[3:11] but then I realized I was only looking at John

[3:14] and when I tried to look at myself

[3:17] Well...

[3:18] I couldn’t.

[3:19] It was like my face was distorted and my eyes were desperately trying to avoid it.

[3:24] I felt like something had gone terribly wrong but I didn’t know what

[3:27] but at the same time I knew.

[3:30] I think that was when it started to sink in.

[3:32] Maybe transitioning wasn’t a choice

[3:34] but something I needed to do to survive

[3:37] Marlene (singing): 🎶 Up where they walk, 🎶

[3:40] 🎶 up where they run 🎶

[3:43] 🎶 Up where they stay all day in the sun 🎶

[3:49] 🎶 Wanderin’ free - 🎶

[3:51] 🎶 wish I could be 🎶

[3:54] 🎶 Part of that world 🎶

[4:00] Marlene (talking): Part of Your World resonates with so many queer people for so many reasons.

[4:04] I mean I don’t think there’s any song I’ve talked about more on this channel

[4:09] but there’s a reason why trans people specifically love it so much.

[4:13] Mermaids have become a cultural symbol

[4:15] for trans identity,

[4:17] they’re easy to find in trans art and one of the most notable trans charities is named after them.

[4:22] In his wonderful book Mermaids and Drag Queens,

[4:24] Yuval Avrami explores why mermaids mean so much.

[4:28] “As a symbol, the mermaid is non-binary in its essence:

[4:32] she defies binaries and dichotomies by living on sea and above it,

[4:36] being both human and animal,

[4:38] and having a human identity but no human genitalia.”

[4:42] There’s a reason why fantasy can be such an important genre for queer people.

[4:46] It allows you to create whatever you want

[4:48] and to express yourself in ways that might not be possible in the real world.

[4:52] In fact, the original Little Mermaid story is thought of to be an expression of queerness.

[4:57] Hans Christian Anderson reportedly wrote the book after finding out that Edvard Collin, a man he had feelings for,

[5:03] had gotten engaged to a woman.

[5:06] “I languished for you as for a pretty Calabrian wench...

[5:09] my sentiments for you are those of a woman.

[5:11] The femininity of my nature and our friendship must remain a mystery.”

[5:17] What Anderson meant is debated.

[5:19] Many people assume he was gay,

[5:22] others day he was bi, ace, the list goes on.

[5:24] Based on that quote, you might think there were also some gender things going on

[5:28] because of him describing his emotions

[5:30] as those of a woman.

[5:32] But you also have to keep in mind that in the late 1800s in Europe

[5:36] there were a few theories about queerness

[5:38] with one even saying that gay men were women’s souls in men’s bodies.

[5:42] So it doesn’t always work with our modern vocab

[5:46] but regardless of what you think he meant

[5:48] it’s pretty clear that some type of queerness, some type of deviation from cisgender heteronormative society was happening

[5:54] but I don't think we need to know Anderson’s exact feelings to see that in the story.

[5:59] “In Anderson’s story, trading the fin for legs involve immense pain:

[6:03] the transformation itself feels as if a sword splits her body

[6:07] and each step she takes afterwards feels like walking on sharp knives.”

[6:12] “The story ends in a complex and tragic fashion -

[6:15] the prince falls in love with another human woman and the mermaid throws herself from the ship,

[6:19] but instead of dying and turning into seafood as she expected,

[6:23] she turns into a ‘daughter of the air’, and might gain an immortal soul similarly to humans.”

[6:28] “Disney’s version changed the story’s ending to a happy ending,

[6:31] as is customary in the studio’s renditions of fairy tales and other children’s stories,

[6:36] and in the animated film Ariel and the Prince marry

[6:39] and live happily ever after as humans.”

[6:41] So the original is quite dark almost to the point where it’s a different story entirely.

[6:45] But I didn’t know that growing up.

[6:47] And honestly I liked the Disney ending.

[6:51] It was helpful for me to see that Ariel went through so much struggle but that everything turned out all right in the end.

[7:02] In early 2021 I texted my friend Judy, asking if she could talk.

[7:07] I had already identified as non-binary since 2015

[7:10] but I was realizing that might not fit me anymore.

[7:13] It was incredibly helpful for me to think of my body and who I am

[7:17] as not being tied to social roles or the gender binary.

[7:20] But I think I needed more.

[7:22] I realized that my biggest limitation wasn’t society,

[7:26] but my body.

[7:28] I didn’t know what to tell Judy.

[7:30] I mean I didn’t know who I was.

[7:32] And a few hours prior I was crying in John’s arms,

[7:35] telling him that I thought I was a woman

[7:37] but when I spoke with Judy I told her about how I thought I could

[7:40] still be non-binary.

[7:42] I mean transition is different for everyone and isn’t always tied to identity.

[7:46] At the end of the call, Judy shared a quote from a movie she had seen.

[7:50] “It’s always the right time to be born.”

[7:53] Eating breakfast the next morning,

[7:55] I told John I didn’t think I needed to transition.

[7:58] When I came out as gay when I was 15,

[8:01] it felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.

[8:04] But when I told John I thought I was a woman, I didn’t feel that.

[8:07] In fact, I felt even more confused more, more stressed.

[8:11] I didn't even have a name yet,

[8:13] but I didn't have to decide.

[8:15] I already was non-binary so I decided to give myself time.

[8:20] In The Little Mermaid, in order to make it to the human world Ariel has to make a deal with Ursula, the sea witch.

[8:26] In exchange for giving Ariel legs, she takes her voice.

[8:30] But before she does that she sings Poor Unfortunate Souls which isn’t just a memorable villain song,

[8:35] but also a lesson in femininity.

[8:38] In Mermaids and Drag Queens it’s even described as a drag performance.

[8:42] Before she starts singing she’s putting on makeup.

[8:44] And though the song is ultimately about her villainy and manipulating Ariel

[8:49] she teaches her how to get a man and never underestimates the importance of body language.

[8:55] After coming out to John and then rescinding my coming out,

[8:57] I moved on.

[8:59] I continued making videos, continued singing, I continued just living.

[9:04] Nearly every week I’d read Judy’s comics, all part of a series called

[9:08] Everything is Somewhat Repaired

[9:10] where she intimately talks about her experiences as a trans woman.

[9:14] In March of 2021 there was an installment called People Are Mirrors

[9:17] and the first panel shocked me.

[9:19] I couldn’t recognize myself as trans before I met other trans people.

[9:24] When I read that I felt like Ariel.

[9:26] I wanted to go to the human world but I didn’t know how.

[9:30] But by reading someone else’s perspective I started seeing myself

[9:34] and I started learning.

[9:37] In late 2021, I started talking to my friends about transitioning.

[9:41] I still didn’t know what that meant for me but

[9:43] I could feel the tides changing

[9:45] then one night in early 2022

[9:47] I was so anxious I felt nauseous.

[9:50] I was literally worried sick and had trouble sleeping.

[9:53] The next morning I looked at my phone and saw a text from a friend.

[9:56] “I liked Marlene a lot,” they said.

[9:59] I then scrolled up and saw that before bed I had texted them two names.

[10:04] And...I liked Marlene a lot too.

[10:07] Later I was on the subway and was looking at my reflection

[10:10] but I couldn’t see myself,

[10:12] I saw someone but I didn’t see me.

[10:15] It had been that way for many years

[10:16] and it clearly wasn’t going away.

[10:18] And in that moment I realized that I had to change.

[10:22] Coincidentally I had plans to meet with Judy that day for lunch.

[10:25] I told her what was up and the conversation changed.

[10:28] It went from us catching up to her coaching me.

[10:31] Judy already had a lot of experience with the bureaucracy of transition

[10:34] and she essentially gave me a guide for navigating it.

[10:36] Judy wasn’t a sea witch but this was magic.

[10:41] And I felt like Ariel.

[10:43] I saw my way out

[10:44] but just like Ariel I have to lose my voice.

[10:54] My voice means a lot to me.

[10:57] In fact I feel like sometimes it was the only thing I had going for me.

[11:00] If I wanted to show someone who I was I would sing them a song.

[11:04] I think it’s more effective than talking.

[11:06] By singing, I can truly share myself with others.

[11:09] And when I was feeling what I now understand to be gender dysphoria.

[11:13] I would sing.

[11:15] Playing shows was an escape.

[11:17] I’d close my eyes and feel like I was out of my body.

[11:19] I thought that my voice was grounding me

[11:22] but early into transition I realized it wasn’t.

[11:24] It was holding me back.

[11:27] So I started making a new voice.

[11:29] I learned everything I could and was training constantly,

[11:32] and I still felt like Ariel.

[11:35] One day I was talking to another friend who’s also a trans woman,

[11:38] and was telling her about working on this video.

[11:40] She was talking to me about transitioning and

[11:42] how when she was learning how to talk again,

[11:45] she felt like Ariel too,

[11:46] going out into the human world without a voice.

[11:49] And I knew exactly what she meant.

[11:53] If I was at a bakery I pointed.

[11:55] I used my fingers.

[11:56] I tried to use my new voice but some days I just didn’t speak at all.

[12:00] Some things just take time.

[12:03] Marlene (singing): 🎶 What would I give 🎶

[12:05] 🎶 If I could live 🎶

[12:07] 🎶 out of these waters? 🎶

[12:10] 🎶 What would I pay 🎶

[12:12] 🎶 To spend a day warm on the sand? 🎶

[12:16] 🎶 Bet’cha on land 🎶

[12:18] 🎶 they understand 🎶

[12:19] 🎶 Bet they don’t reprimand their daughters 🎶

[12:23] 🎶 Bright young women 🎶

[12:25] 🎶 sick of swimmin’ 🎶

[12:27] 🎶 Ready to stand 🎶

[12:31] Marlene (talking): I had to leave a job because I’m trans.

[12:34] For most people, me transitioning was not an issue

[12:37] but for this job it was.

[12:39] After a few humiliating conversations I left.

[12:43] To make a long story short

[12:45] In this vulnerable time of my life

[12:47] I didn’t want to argue.

[12:48] I was going to leave that gig soon anyway,

[12:51] so I just let it be.

[12:52] In a perfect world I would be able to use the resources available to me to stand up for my rights as a trans person...

[12:58] ...but I just didn’t have it in me.

[13:01] I kind of knew it would happen,

[13:03] but it still hurt.

[13:05] It was the first time that I had to confront the fact

[13:08] that my life was about to become much harder.

[13:10] People would harass me every time I go outside.

[13:13] People will start to be hyper aware of

[13:16] and criticize every aspect of

[13:17] how I dress, act, and speak.

[13:20] To find some type of flaw that supposedly gives it away.

[13:23] And I’ll start doing that to myself too.

[13:25] I’ll start internalizing and battling these impossibly high toxic standards

[13:30] that aren’t actually about preserving womanhood but simply limiting trans womanhood.

[13:34] It’s also not lost on me

[13:36] that in the months since I started transitioning

[13:38] transphobic legislation in the U.S. has increased exponentially.

[13:42] To many people I’m not a human, I’m a problem.

[13:45] But weirdly enough at the same time I feel more comfortable than ever.

[13:50] I feel my life coming back to me.

[13:52] John had a few days off in March

[13:54] and he spontaneously flew to Berlin

[13:56] because he wanted to be there with me during this time of my life.

[13:59] And while I was finishing up my previous video last week,

[14:01] the doorbell rang and I found out he sent me some flowers.

[14:04] Part of my fear in transitioning was that it would ruin our marriage

[14:08] but it’s done the exact opposite.

[14:10] In loving and giving so much of myself to someone,

[14:14] I can now really give him the whole me.

[14:16] Earlier in this video, I talking about how a big point for me early on was realizing that transitioning wasn’t a want

[14:23] but it was something that I had to do to survive.

[14:25] But now I realize it’s so much more than that.

[14:29] It’s not just about survival,

[14:30] it’s something I have to do to blossom

[14:33] but I don’t always feel like Ariel.

[14:35] Unlike her, getting my voice back isn’t immediate.

[14:38] I’m still working on it,

[14:40] but I’m feeling more and more like myself each day.

[14:43] Two weeks ago I went to my friend, Chad’s, album release show.

[14:46] It was the first time I went to a social event as Marlene

[14:49] and it was so good to see my friend and

[14:51] hear Chad’s new songs.

[14:53] Before the last song in his set,

[14:55] he dedicated it to old friends with new names

[14:58] and I immediately thought

[15:00] I’m so glad to be here.

END OF TRANSCRIPT

Youtube Channel: Dreamsounds

Video Description:

I'm so glad to be here 🏳️‍⚧️ https://www.patreon.com/dreamsounds

Special thanks to Judy Moore (https://www.instagram.com/ignatzhoch/) and Yuval Avrami (https://www.instagram.com/yuvalavrami/) for letting me use your work in this video!

___________________ The pieces of media and music featured in this video are quoted for critical and educational purposes. Those looking to completely understand the pieces are encouraged to purchase the original works.

Stock footage sources: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1y... ___________________ MUSIC USED: "All of Me and All of You" by Nocturnal Spirits

"Part of Your World" by Howard Ashman and Alan Menken

Jon Michael Ogletree's cover of "Part of Your World" (licensed under Creative Commons): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grCjS...

"Three Days in Venice" by Franz Gordon

"String Quartet Nº. 3, Op. 41, Nº. 3 - III. Adagio molto" by Robert Schumann, performed by Traditional (Epidemic Sound)

"Beneath the Waves" by Gavin Luke

"Words in Disguise" by The Magnus Ringblom Quartet

"Sunny San Francisco" by Oakwood Station

"Retrace" by Arden Forest

___________________ 00:00 Introduction 00:58 Seeing Myself 02:08 Part of Your World 02:51 Marriage 04:01 Trans Mermaids 07:02 Changing Tides 10:55 My Voice 12:30 Leaving a Job

Pinned Comment by Dreamsound:

I'm elated to finally share with y'all what's been happening over the past few months 💗 Between the bureaucracy and having to leave a job because I'm trans, it's been an...interesting time. But now I can work more on videos and other gigs, so I'm excited to share more with you in the next few weeks! If you want to support the show, becoming a patron really helps me to keep making videos: https://www.patreon.com/dreamsounds

If Patreon isn't accessible, even just watching or sharing my videos are great ways to help, so, thank you so much!

I also want to shout out two people who made this possible: Judy Moore and Yuval Avrami. Judy's work is here and I highly recommend you check out her comics: https://www.instagram.com/ignatzhoch/

Yuval's wonderful book "Mermaids and Drag Queens" is in the works to be published in a journal, but if you want to read it, he said anyone who DMs him on Insta can get a free PDF: https://www.instagram.com/yuvalavrami/

---

Notes: This is a reminder for those who don’t know that none of the videos I transcribe belong to me. They belong to the content creators and the crew behind the videos. I'm just someone who wants to provide video transcripts because the auto-generated CC feature on YouTube is.... not great most of the time. Plus I want to provide a way for people to understand and enjoy these videos. My transcripts may not be 100% as I am not a professional. For this video, I focused on the speaker.

If there are any corrections you would like me to make, let me know in the comment section of the post.

If you like this video or any other video from Dreamsounds, please support the creator by watching her videos on the YouTube platform and through other means by her.

Thank you and have a great spring and summer! 💗🔆☀️

#dreamsounds #trans mermaids #Judy Moore #Yuval Avrami #the little mermaid #Ariel #Hi Marlene :D #coming out #lgbtqai #lgbtq #lgbt pride #transgender #trans woman #CCKN transcripts #lgbtq community #lgbtqai+

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scabopolis · 3 years

Note

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

Hope that I do this properly 🙃

I would adore a XO between Veronica Mars (LoVe) & Once Upon a Time (C/S).

PROMPT: "I’m really competitive and drunk and I just told a rival that my relationship is way better than theirs, but they don’t believe you exist (but I’m too stubborn to admit they’re right)" OR really anything you'd like. Honestly, I'm dying to see Logan and Killian interact/co-swagger.

And / or another installment of "Come Rain or Come Shine" from In Lovers Meeting because I love it with my whole ❤️.

Thank you so much for doing this. You made my day,

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

Oh @jjmazzy you bring my heart so much joy! I didn’t feel quite up to the task to do a crossover between OUaT and Veronica Mars so I went straight for a OUaT AU. I hope that’s okay?

This is just a silly little thing that I am realizing only fulfills about 40% of the prompt, but I think it’s cute??

ANYWAY! Enough hemming and hawing xx *** Title: Of Expats and Onion Rings Rating: PG Fandom: Once Upon a Time Pairing: Killian Jones/Emma Swan (mentions of Robin/Marian and a smattering of other characters) Additional Tags: Two out of three of my OUaT fics feature Killian as a bartender, silliness and only half a prompt, probably way more fluff than is medically recommended Word Count: 1,500

Every Friday night, Emma Swan sits on the same barstool at the same bar in the same restaurant. This Friday night has her staring into space as she lets the sounds from the kitchen and the bar swirl around her. It’s busier than usual, with almost all the booths and tables filled and the bar area half-occupied. In fact, when she first walked into the bar, she worried there wouldn’t be a seat for her. But the bartender caught her eye and waved her over, a menu and a glass of water waiting for her in her usual seat at the end of the bar.

Said bartender slides her an Old Fashioned, extra maraschino cherries on the toothpick per usual.

She takes a small sip of the drink. “Why is it so busy?”

Killian’s eyes roam about the room and then come back to rest on her. “Some magazine labeled us the best kept secret in Portland, Maine.”

“And in doing so—”

“Assured that we would never be a secret again. Yes.”

“The pitfalls of fame.”

“Burger or chicken sandwich?”

“Burger. Any chance—?”

“Aye, probably a very good chance, but only because Graham is sweet on you.”

Emma feels her cheeks redden. “He’s not sweet on me.”

“Sure he isn’t.”

She watches Killian step away from the bar and into the kitchen to talk to Graham. How Graham can manage to listen to anything given the noise of the dining room and the kitchen she’ll never know. Graham and Killian both look over at her. Graham rolls his eyes but nods, and Emma raises her glass in thanks.

“Okay,” she says to Killian when he’s back at the bar. “He might be a little sweet on me.” She takes a long sip of her cocktail.

Killian’s brow is knit with concentration. “Long day?”

She nods. “I had a run in with Zelena.”

“Ah. The wicked witch of the northeast. What’d she do this time?” The ticket printer next to Killian’s till spits out a long drink order, but he listens even as he mixes drink and pours glasses of wine.

“She got engaged over the weekend and hasn’t shut up about it. And today, she took great pains to ask me, in front of everyone in the faculty lounge, if I’d be okay if she didn’t give me a plus one.”

“Bit rude, isn’t it?”

“Right? But then she kept going on and on asking how long it’d been since I dated someone, and did I know that after 35, forty-five percent of women’s eggs are considered genetically abnormal and her fiancé is a very wealthy furniture manufacturer and she’s certain he has some less attractive less wealthy friends he could introduce me to and on and on and on.”

“Does she truly want you at her wedding?”

“Oh, yes. She said she wouldn’t take no for an answer.” She runs her finger along the condensation of her glass. “Which is when I did something very very very stupid.”

“Smacked her?”

Emma snorts. “I wish. No I—” Her explanation is interrupted by the arrival of her burger and the plate of special order onion rings. Onion rings which are technically available only as an add-on to the steak sandwich but that Emma has a 80% success rate of cajoling the kitchen to make her a plate of.

She eats her meal with one eye turned to Killian, waiting for a long enough lull in the drink tickets to finish her story. She’s almost finished her burger when Killian slides another Old Fashioned in front of her.

“What was this very stupid thing you did?” he asks, leaning towards her.

“I told her I was dating someone.”

Killian remains where he is but she notices the clench of his jaw. “Ah,” he says. “I was unaware.” He seems to hear his own words as he says them because he cringes. “Not that there’s a reason you would tell me. I mean, we’re friends, but friends in that way that I get you drinks and —”

Emma rests a hand on Kilian’s to stop the rambling. “I’m not. Dating anyone, that is.”

“Then why—?”

“It just popped out. I’m not sure who was more surprised, me or Zelena.”

“So, this fake boyfriend of yours. Just who is he?”

“Well, okay, so this makes sense when you remember it’s Friday, and I knew I’d be coming here.”

“Right,” he says, equal parts cautious and curious.

“I told her my boyfriend was British.”

Killian shakes his head.

ExPats has been her weekly haunt for close to a year now and while not everyone who works there is a British expatriate, with Killian as bar manager, Robin as front of house manager, Graham as chef de cuisine, and Phillip as pastry chef, it kind of feels that way.

“And that he had blue eyes,” she continues.

“Ah, I see,” he says, teasing her. “Are you telling me you’re sweet on Graham too?”

“Not Graham.”

“In that case, Marian is likely going to have a big problem with you trying to date her husband.”

“And, uh,” she clears her throat, “I told Zelena he has dark hair.”

Killian wings an eyebrow. “How dark?”

“Uh, right about your color probably.”

“My color?”

“Probably. I said probably.”

“Interesting.” Emma takes a sip of her drink. There’s a delicious, hazy feeling brought on from the second cocktail washing through her veins. “So, you and I are dating?” he asks.

“Stupid. It was so stupid.”

“I wouldn’t say that. I mean, I’ve been meaning to ask you out for months now. This might be just the little push I need.”

“What?”

“What did you just say?”

“What now?” he asks in return, the picture of innocence.

“You’ve been trying to ask me out?”

“Not as such, no.”

“Oh.” She sinks back in her seat, disappointed.

“I didn’t want to risk you running scared and not being here every Friday night.”

Emma perks right back up again. “Oh?”

“You already said that, love.”

Emma looked down at her plate, the remnants of the crispy bits from her onion rings on her plate. Something occurs to her then. “Graham doesn’t give these to me because I want them. Does he?”

“Excuse me?”

If she’s not mistaken the tips of his ears have gone a little red. She loves his little elf ears. “He makes these for me because you ask him. Don’t you?”

“I might have told him they bring you an inordinate amount of joy.” He scratches idly at a spot on his arm. “And that it brings me an inordinate amount of joy to see how happy they make you.”

“Did you know my weekly ExPats date used to be on Wednesdays?”

She can see him try to mentally adjust to the change of direction in the conversation. “Really?”

“I only came in a few times, but then one week, I had parent/teacher conferences so I came on Friday. And there you were.” Emma shrugs. “Your Old Fashioned is better than Will’s.” She bites off one of the maraschino cherries from the toothpick. “Your smile is better, too.”

“Emma, darling, are you flirting with me?”

“What? Suddenly it’s a crime to flirt with my boyfriend?”

Killian laughs and it makes her heart hum. She likes the clean line of his throat as he tilts his head back. “Your boyfriend? I don’t suppose you’d want to go out on a date with, then?”

“I’m free on Wednesday.”

“Funny that,” he says. “That happens to be my day off.”

“Is it?”

Emma would be content to sit at this bar all night and let Killian smile at her and make her drinks. It seems like Killian is having similar thoughts, until something seemingly flies out of nowhere to hit him in the back of the head.

Killian reels around to find Robin standing there, arms folded across his chest.

“What’d you throw at me, you git?” Killian asks.

“A dinner roll.” Robin gestures at the drink ticket printer. A ticket printer which has at least 10-tickets waiting to be fulfilled. “Pardon, Emma. Mind if he stops flirting with you long enough to fulfill the drink orders?”

“You’re fired,” Killian says.

“For the last time, mate, you can’t fire me. My name is on the lease right next to yours.”

“Murder it is, then.”

“Make the nice customers their cocktails and then you can murder me.”

Robin walks away, and Emma notices it’s not just her at the bar who finds herself charmed by the whole display between the two men. She thinks she might see a small group of women sneakily taking a cell phone video, giggling as they watch it through.

“Emma, I’m sorry, but I—”

She waves him off. “Do your thing. I’ll be here.”

“Yeah?” he asks, and when she nods, he beams. “Good, because if we’re in a committed relationship I’m probably going to need your phone number.”

“Pour the drinks, you goon.”

#FOR YOU JJMAZZY #killian jones #emma swan #captain swan #cs fanfiction #ouat fanfiction #p: emma x killian #never stories

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remys-lucky-franc · 3 years

Text

Kissing Promts Request - Remy x MC (QOT)

#40 - A gentle kiss that quickly descends into passion, with little regard for what’s going on around them.

Written from MC POV

~1300 words

Again, it’s not totally nsfw, but these kissing prompts are lending themselves to somewhat racier writing than I usually post - so, that was your warning if that’s not your fic preference, folks 💕

[MORE] [[MORE]]

The Poppy’s latest heist has just finished: relieving an undeserving London-based oligarch of his extensive art collection. As Nikolai said when we toasted in celebration last night, ‘it’s been a somewhat protracted endeavour, but all really very satisfying and worthwhile’. It’s taken several months to complete and has been a particularly challenging and tiring escapade, so we’ve all decided that some downtime to rest and recharge before the next heist begins would do us some good.

Remy and I decided to head back to France as soon as we could, to the chocolate-box cottage we bought outside the city dubbed by Remy as ‘Château Chevalier’ - our little love nest: where we escape to when we want to spend some time alone - just us - secluded from the world in our perfect domestic bliss. It’s not as large or grand a space as the moniker suggests, but it fits us so wonderfully: a modern open plan kitchen and living area, a beautiful master bedroom and a smaller one where I can paint, a bathroom, and a small private garden lined by hedges that basks in sunshine most of the day. From the first time we set foot inside, I felt at home and could picture us happy here - croissants for breakfast on the terrace, relaxing on the sofa watching movies, tangled together as moonlight spills through the bedroom windows. Our home; our castle.

Remy’s cooking dinner for us, as has become our little routine in our château. He loves to cook and it’s a joy to watch him. Music plays in the background as I perch at the end of the small breakfast bar with an intoxicating glass of red wine that we only ever have here. We chatter and laugh about the heists gone by, his brother’s new romance, our friends and dozens of other topics as they flit through our minds. Remy glides effortlessly around the kitchen and makes even the most complex of tasks look like child’s play. I observe with admiring eyes: everything my husband does, he does it with flair - from the way he rapidly chops ingredients and tosses them into the pan, to how he decants wine directly from the bottle into our food with never a measurement taken. I offer to help and my assistance is swiftly declined,

“Everything is under control, ma cherie”, he assures me, shooting me that bright signature smile that makes my heart skip every time, “Sit. Relax. Enjoy the wine with your Remy.” Normally, I simply nod, sit back and enjoy the show, but tonight I choose to pout and fix my saddest brown eyes on him - the ones I know that he just can’t say ‘no’ to, “Please? Let me help you?”

Remy opens his mouth to object, but quickly closes it again before silently agreeing with a flourish of his hands. He would do anything to make me happy and I love him for that. I bounce down from the bar stool, wine glass still in hand, beaming at him, “Yey! What do you want me to do?” He passes me a knife and asks me to julienne some veg, so I wash my hands and get to work slicing as I sing along the music. Before too long I have a bundle of matchstick vegetables and can feel Remy’s eyes on me. One arm snakes around my waist, a whisk in the other hand. He appraises the quality and quantity of my veg - satisfied, he rewards me with a sweet kiss on my cheek, making me blush before returning to his saucepan.

My first task successfully completed, I lean back against the cabinets, sip my wine and watch as he tosses ingredients into one of the simmering pans on the stove, “What can I do next?”, I ask him. Remy gestures to the pantry and requests some flour for his roux so I place my glass down, steal a kiss and playfully squeeze his behind as I pass him. A sound of feigned offence follows me into the pantry and makes me giggle.

After a little searching I locate the packet of flour on the top shelf and as I stretch overhead to bring it down I realise the bag isn’t tightly closed. A little plume of white powder sprinkles to the floor and I dance to avoid it’s path: I do reasonably well as it only dusts my hands leaving my black clothing unharmed! Biting back a mischievous little chuckle as an idea pops into my head, I head back into the kitchen and hand Remy the flour packet, before booping his button nose with my other flour-covered hand. Taken by surprise, he splutters and tries to wipe it away before pulling me close to him. I try to wriggle out of his grasp, laughing but fearful of a flour-filled revenge - but he grips me firmly and his green eyes are glittering as his lips meet mine. A kiss, like so many of ours, that begins in a grin - joy-filled and gentle.

“I’m sorry-“ I mumble against his mouth, “I couldn’t resist...”

His hands settle on my sides, thumbs skimming over the waistline of my jeans grazing the bare skin of my hip bones. A series of soft kisses nuzzle my lips peppered with the words, “And I. Can’t. Resist you. Cherie.” I smirk, as I run my fingers through his hair, teasing him, “Hmmm. I am pretty irresistible.”

The lighthearted humour between us evaporates and everything slows down as Remy closes the little space remaining between us. My stomach stirs recognising the growing hunger in his eyes as they lock with mine. There’s a tinge of dark, rich Merlot on his warm breath as my lips yield and I melt into his touch. Within seconds our kiss has deepened, tongues tangle and my hands rake over the expanse of his toned back, shoulders and rear - my pulse racing. We gravitate clumsily back toward the cool granite top and I groan as I make contact; the hard lines of Remy’s body crush against mine while deft fingers burn beneath my shirt roaming over my curves. Remy hoists me up to sit on the counter effortlessly and instinctively my limbs wrap around him drawing him ever closer to me - every kiss more frenetic than the last, every subtle shift of his hips electrifying me. Just two thin layers of clothing between me and all that I ache for, with every touch stoking the flame between us and making my head spin.

As addled by lust as my brain is, I’m vaguely aware that the saucepans on the stove bubble away furiously now neglected - and that dinner is probably ruined. If Remy has noticed he is as far past caring as I am. Kisses sear across my collarbone as I feebly mouth, “Remy... The sauce is burning...”

His teeth drag slowly from the hollow of my throat to my ear and he rasps, “So am I, ma rêveuse,” he breaks away from me momentarily to turn off the stove, grinning wickedly, “and only one of us can be saved.” Helping me down from the countertop our lips collide once more and our passion overtakes; discarded clothing, declarations of love and scandalous intentions litter the path to our bedroom. As we sink into the soft mattress together a little voice far in the back of my head briefly considers that we can perhaps try to salvage our dinner later but I know from the look in my Remy’s eyes that very soon I’ll have forgotten my own name, never mind the ability to think about what state our meal is in. I laugh to myself as I decide ‘there’s always pizza’ - and that’s the last thought in my head before my brain short-circuits and I’m losing myself to something infinitely better and more satisfying.

#lovestruck #remy chevalier #kissing prompts

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lorelexi · 4 years

Text

Too Bad I'm not Heather

"There were a few things that Kuroo Tetsuro found that he loved, and when he did, his eyes would brighten up. Some of these things included volleyball, Kenma, stupid chemistry jokes, and now, Heather.

There were a few things that Kuroo Tetsuro loved, and you were not one of them."

Word Count: 3.2K

Genre: angst

A/N: this is based off of the lyrics to the song "Heather" by Conan Gray. I'm trying to work on writing longer fics so here's my first attempt 😬

☆

The December air nipped at your cheeks and at the tip of your nose. Winter was quickly approaching and you mentally prepared yourself for the upcoming weeks when the first snow of the season would finally fall. You regret not having worn a real coat over your uniform blazer as you rubbed your hands up and down your arms, hoping the friction would create enough warmth to suffice for the lack of fabric covering your body.It was only the 3rd day of December but with every day that passed, it became increasingly colder. Just a week ago your winter uniform and a scarf would have been enough to get you through the day but now, you were sure your nose was gonna grow icicles from how cold it was. Nevertheless it was too late to turn back now, you were more than halfway to school at this point so you were just going to have to deal with some shivers for the rest of the day.

The closer that you got to the school, the faster you willed your legs to move, eager to get into a warm classroom as soon as you could. As the gates of the school came into view, so did a flood of students who-like you- likely longed for the warmth of their respective classrooms.

With hands still making weak attempts at keeping your arms and torso warm, you let your eyes scan over the crowd and toward the gym, searching for a familiar head of messy black hair.

Almost as if on cue, the boy you searched for stepped out of the boys gym, following behind the group of his more rowdy friends, jumping around and heading their separate ways to their respective buildings and classes.

“Kuroo!” You call out his name and his head turns to look toward the sound of your voice, with a smile.

He stands in his place and waits for you to come to a halt in front him.

“What on earth-” is the first thing that comes out of his mouth when he sees you up close. He even has the nerve to laugh a little, a smirk adorning his face. A smirk that sends chills down your spine, that are arguably worse than those from the cold.

“You look like you've been stuck in a freezer for the past hour. If you shiver any harder you might knock yourself out yn.”

“Shut up, Kuroo. Some of us did not have the privilege of being in a warm gym for the greater part of the morning.” you pouted up at him, your hands finally coming to a stop, now just resting on your arms.

“Well where’s your coat? That could have decreased your problem by like at least 40%” He inspected your outfit and gazed up at you pointedly.

“40%?” You remarked with an eyebrow raised, ignoring how you involuntarily swallowed hard at the way that he looked over your form.

“I don’t know.” he laughed. “I’m just tossing up percentages.”

You rolled your eyes at this and he shook his head and spoke before you could start to tease him.

“That’s off topic though. Your coat?”

Tossing your head to the side you opted to blankly watch the other students walk by you than to look at him any longer.”I didn’t think it would be this cold today, and by the time I realized I might need a coat, I was already nearly half way here. I decided that I’d rather be cold than late.”

Kuroo sighed, “I shouldn’t even be surprised. When are you ever prepared for anything.”

The moment the words left his mouth and traveled to your ears, your face scrunched up and you whipped your head around to glare at him. “Hey! That’s not even true Kur-”

A hand being placed on your head stopped your sentence in its tracks.

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” he paused for a moment before removing his hand from your head. “Hold this.” he commanded abruptly, practically throwing his bag at you.

You were too busy huffing to even think about why Kuroo was taking off his sweater.

“Here, I’ll trade you.” He took his bag back from you and placed his sweater in your hands in return.

You looked down at the dark blue fabric in your hands. “Hey, wait-”

“Nope! Shhhh. I already know what you’re going to say. ‘Oh thank you Kuroo, my dearest friend, you’re so kind, how would I ever live without you.’ Really, it’s okay, there’s no need to thank me.” He dismissed your protest with a wave of his hand as he began to walk toward the main building where both of your classes were.

As you watched his slowly retreating figure, you pretty much gave up any further protest knowing he was going to insist on you wearing his sweater anyway. Putting your arms through his sweater and adjusting your bag on our shoulder, you ran to catch up to him.

The two of you walked side by side for a few minutes, talking about your class activities and how his volleyball practice went.It didn’t last long however. Not after he saw her walking up about 20 feet ahead of you.

Kuroo’s eyes widened and he hurriedly wrapped up the conversation you'd been having.

“Hey, I see Heather up there, I’m gonna go catch up and head to my class, but I’ll see you later okay?” He didn’t actually give you any time to respond before he was running toward her, matching her strides when he finally caught up beside her.

Heather was a girl in Kuroo’s class. They hadn't been friends for that long but even then, it didn't take very long for them to start hanging out more often. Whether it was in school or out of it, it was like she was just constantly in his thoughts. You thought back bitterly on all of the times that he’d been texting her when he was supposed to be spending time with you.

You knew it was none of your business, but you couldn’t help the sinking feeling in your stomach when you saw the way he looked at her.

There were a few things that Kuroo Tetsuro found joy in, and when he did, his eyes would brighten up and there was something warm that swirled through them.. The gold of his eyes gleamed and you could almost see the joy radiating off of them. Often you’d see this happen when he played volleyball, or when he got kenma to laugh at a particular stupid chemistry joke; there’d even been times when he’d looked at you with those eyes.

You weren’t even sure if he knew he was doing it. If he knew just how mesmerising this look was. You’re sure that if you brought it up, he would deny it, but it’s the same look- the same glimmer in his eyes-when he looks at her.

☆

It’s mid-March now. Winter had come and gone, and as the seasons changed, so did your relationship with Kuroo.

December third was the day when you first noticed the way his eyes brightened whenever he looked at Heather. December third. That one stupid day was the exact moment that it all started to go downhill for you.

You and Kuroo slowly stopped hanging out as much. If he wasn’t with Kenma, he was probably with her. He stopped walking home with you and he stopped waiting for you in between classes. Now, those were things that he did for her.

Given all of these things, it was no surprise to anyone who’d had the opportunity to see them in the halls, or in the courtyard-or literally anywhere- that they started dating not long after winter began.

It was a frustrating thing to watch. To watch her slowly gain everything that was yours while it slipped away from your fingers at a rate that was much too fast for your liking.

You’d spent the majority of your friendship with Kuroo harboring feelings for him. Part of you always hoped that it would work out some day; that one day he’d finally realize just how much you liked him, and that then you’d finally get what you had been hoping for for the past few years.

But that’s not how life works, so you tried to make yourself feel better. You tried telling yourself that you should have known that it would never work out.

Why would it? She was everything you weren’t.

You tried to focus all of your effort into trying to ignore the feelings you had for him. Whenever anyone asked you what was wrong, you’d dismiss them, making up some excuse about being tired or distracted by your classes. Everyone knew what was going on, you missed the pitied glances that they threw your way whenever you saw Kuroo with Heather, or whenever he’d talk about her during practice or when you all were hanging out.

All you wanted was for Kuroo to be happy. If him being happy meant him being with her, instead of you, then you would just have to get over yourself and let him be.

As time passed you got better at it. You’re almost certain that the feelings you held for him never truly went away, but rather you just forced them into hiding.

It was something that you figured you may be able to do until Kuroo decided to finally just stop talking to you all together, but the limits of your willpower were tested every time Heather passed you in the hall-offering you a wave and a smile- while she wore Kuroo’s sweater. That same sweater he’d given to you all those months ago.

But it wasn’t December anymore. It was almost spring now, and whatever you had with Kuroo, he left behind in the cold.

☆

This series had continued for months. The more time that had passed since Kuroo and Heather had started dating, the further he got away from you. You had originally hoped that you two would remain friends after they’d started dating, thinking that nothing would change too drastically, but you were wrong. The more time you spent around them, the more it hurt you. Eventually you started to push yourself away from Kuroo almost entirely- even further than he had unintentionally pushed you. Being around them hurt you too much and you decided it was just better if you kept yourself out of his life as much as possible.

Honestly you would have said you had been doing an alright job at it. You avoided Kuroo as much as possible and tried to stop thinking about him, but when graduation rolled around, coach Nekomata decided to do something nice in honor of the third years. A nice graduation dinner was planned and it was made clear to you by your friends and the coach himself that you were more than welcome to join them.

You denied at first, wanting to spare yourself the inevitable sight of Kuroo and Heather being all mushy together, but you were somehow convinced to go by a few of the boys saying something about it being their last opportunity to hang out with you before you graduated.

It was a cute set up, despite being in the boy’s gym, the decorations and lights that adorned the walls in nekoma’s signature colors did a lot to provide a nice an simple atmosphere, contrary to the loud sounds of squeaking shoes and volleyballs hitting the floor that usually bounced off of these walls.

Staying close to Lev and Yamamoto for most of the night-too scared to be near Yaku or Kenma in fear of attracting Kuroo- you watched the team have a good time and focused your attention on anything that wasn’t Kuroo, with his arm wrapped around Heather’s shoulder.

Much to your surprise, most of the night had passed with little to no interaction with Kuroo despite the close confines of both of you being in the gym for this long.

You let out a small sigh of relief at the thought of not having to go through TOO much torment tonight. Just watching them was enough heartache.

Unfortunately it seemed that your sigh of relief jinxed whatever you had going for you that night, because then Kuroo walked right up to you, a lopsided smile adorning his features

You hated the way that he walked, looking so effortly attractive, having absolutely no idea that each step further that he walked was another piece of your heart being chipped away.

Your chest felt heavy and your throat felt dry when he finally stopped in front of you.

“Hey y/n, how’s it going?” The absolute shamelessness and ignorance of the way his words made you feel began to anger you.

Without saying anything you simply glared at Kuroo with an expression that nearly screamed to be left alone.

“Don’t look at me like that.” He let out a light laugh recalling the way that your face reminded him of the way that Kenma would look at him when he bothered him while playing a new videogame.

“We haven’t really hung out much at all lately, let’s catch up.”

“I would rather not right now.” Your shoulders hunched, attempting to make yourself small under his gaze.

“Why not?” Oblivious. “I’d say now is the perfect time to catch up.Y'know before we graduate and such.” He shrugged, tilting his cup of soda, watching the liquid swirl.

“Whatever,” You huffed. You were starting to get more and more annoyed the more he spoke. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be right now?” Your eyes finally met his, your challenging glare attempting to pierce through the oblivious air that surrounded him. You just wanted him to get the hint and leave you alone.

“No?” Clearly your plan wasn’t working.

“What about your little girlfriend?” you sneered.

“Uh, she's fine? She's talking to Kai right now.” Kuroo was extremely smart-one of the smartest you knew- but his inability to understand you in this moment was infuriating.

You weren’t sure if he really didn’t have any clue what was going on, or if he was just playing dumb, attempting to avoid ever bringing it up or talking about it. The latter seemed much more likely, he was probably just trying to spare your feelings. Although that didn’t explain why he was so intent on speaking with you now despite your fairly clear reluctance to carry the conversation.

Thoughts spiraling in your head, you finally cracked.

“Oh my god Kuroo! Can you just leave me alone!? Please.” The room became quiet at the sound of your exclamation.

Without much thought to your belongings, you hastily rushed out of the gym to avoid the prying eyes that loomed around you.

Once outside, you stood in silence for about 30 seconds, berating yourself for losing your cool now, of all times, after all the time you had spent working to keep yourself together, holding everything in.

Head in your hands, and eyes shut tight, you heard footsteps approach you slowly. When they came to a halt behind you, a voice accompanied them.

“Hey, what happened back there?” Kuroo tossed his head back toward the building, referring to what had just gone down inside.

“If something is going on you know you can talk to me about it right?” He looked at you with eyes that flooded with concern, but you didn’t even have it in you to revel in the attentiveness of his actions.

You whipped around to face him quickly, eyebrows scrunched together, a frown evident on your face, and feelings and thoughts of frustration quickly bubbling up and past your throat before you could even think to stop them.

“Oh come on Kuroo. Don’t do that.” you shook your head at him incredulously. “Don’t act like you have no clue what’s going on.”

Kuroo looked taken aback by the aggressiveness of your voice.

“What do you mean ‘act’?” he retorted. “I have no clue what the hell has been going on with you lately. We never hang out anymore and you never seem like you want to talk to me or be near me anymore, so what’s your deal y/n?”

The way he said it, more like a demand than an actual question, broke the dam you had been desperately trying to keep back even after your little outburst in the gym.

“It’s because I like you stupid! I’m in love with you!” your hands remained close to your sides, fists clenched as you continued to plead with him. “And I know that I shouldn’t be because I know how happy you are with her but it’s just so frustrating.”

The words fell past your lips and you ducked your head down, hoping to hide away from him the frustrated tears that pecked your waterline. “Do you understand how hard it was to just watch you fall totally head over heels with someone who I knew I could never be?” your voice faltered and you felt yourself crumple more when the words from your mouth met your ears.“I can’t even stand to be near you when I know it’s not me that you’re with. God, I don’t even know why I ever thought that I’d even have any sliver of a chance with you. Obviously you'd choose someone like her. She’s popular, she’s nice, she’s in your class so she's obviously way smarter than me too, and to top it all off, she’s definitely prettier than me. I’m not even nearly half as pretty as her. I was stupid to think that I’d ever be anything that you wanted.”

Standing there, defeated, you began to rub the tears away from your eyes.

Kuroo didn’t even say anything. He just stood there.Whether in shock, or pity, or empathy, you didn’t know. You weren’t even really sure you wanted him to say anything. In your perfect world maybe he would have wiped away your tears and told you that he’d loved you all along.

There was no use thinking about it anyway. It wasn’t going to change the reality that he chose her over you. He chose her and not you.

And so you walked away that night outside the gym, brushing past Kuroo without a word, back into the building where you avoided meeting the stares of your friends, grabbing your things and heading toward the door, ignoring the few calls of our name from those who wanted to make sure you were okay.

You walked home alone that night. It hadn’t been the first time, and it likely wouldn’t be the last, but the loneliness and the ache in your heart felt different this time. Because now you knew for sure that you were never and that you would never be Kuroo Tetsuro’s first choice.

It’s too bad you’re not Heather.

#kuroo x reader #kuroo x y/n #hq kuroo #kuroo testuro #kuroo tetsuro x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu fanfic

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terriblebloggerrob · 3 years

Text

My CPA Journey

I originally decided to start my CPA (certified public accountant) journey in my senior year of high school in 2001. Unknown at the time, my inattentive ADHD derailed me in college. I still managed to graduate in 2009 with my B.S. in accounting and started work at a public accounting firm. Still needing about 20 credit hours, I enrolled in a B.S. in finance program in 2011 and in 2013 I was then eligible to sit for the 4 CPA exam sections.

My whole post high school life I was always reminded on how hard it was to pass the exam sections and since each section cost around $230, I didn't want to register for the exams until I was ready. With ADHD, I realized I would never be ready. When you qualify to sit for the exam you have to register and take at least 1 section of the exam within 18 months of being registered... so at the 17th month I took my first section, Audit in 2017. I failed. This was the section I was supposed to be an "Expert" in since I handled audit matters at my firm. This devastated me and drove me into depression.

In January of 2018 I purchased Rogers CPA review program that included video lectures, text book and practice exams. I took AUD again in October of 2018. I studied about 30+ hours watching mostly Rogers lectures and I passed! I didn't find out right away, after around 40+ days of waiting, I found out right after dropping my kids off with their Nana. I wish I'd found out just an hour earlier so I could have celebrated with them but nonetheless, I was so excited.

This left me with three more sections to pass (BEC, FAR and REG). I was motivated. When you pass a section, you have to pass the remaining three within 18 months or you lose credit for the one that you passed 18 months ago. Obviously, this meant I would quickly schedule the remaining exams ASAP.

Wrong... I waited about 8 months before taking another section, BEC and I failed. I studied less than 2 hours for that section. Then in October of 2019 I passed FAR (I studied 30+ hours). However, I scheduled my REG just two weeks after FAR and I was so burned out that I didn't study at all for REG and I failed it. So at this point I passed 2 exams out of 5 total attempts with my BEC retake coming up in December. I failed my BEC retake (studied 2 hours). Now I passed 2 exams out of 6 total attempts.

I was distraught, my window to passing the remaining two (BEC and REG) was quickly closing before I'd lose credit for passing AUD (meaning I'd have to retake AUD). I'd have to pass the remaining two by March of 2020 and if I failed just one of them, I wouldn't have enough time to retake them before losing credit on my AUD exam. I was depressed and demotivated, believing I was a crappy accountant and dumb as a bag of rocks. Compounding my negative emotional state was the fact that now my Rogers exam prep course subscription was now passed the 18 month window that I purchased a couple years ago. Additionally, the fact that I didn't really use Rogers that much in studying for REG or BEC prior to this point just fed into my depression. I called them and they graciously allowed me to have a 6 month extension. I finally took advantage of those video lectures this time!

I then changed my mindset, I went full throttle and scheduled my BEC exam for the middle of January of 2020 and my REG exam at the middle of February. I decided I was going to study 30+ hours for each, came up with a detailed study strategy and watched hours of the Rogers video and audio lectures while taking notes.

It takes about 20-30 days to get your score back after taking a section of the exam, this period of time was excruciating. My ADHD couldn't properly handle this period of time. My BEC score release was a day after the Super Bowl. I am a HUGE Chiefs fan, this is the Super Bowl they WON!! The very next day I found out I passed BEC with a total of 10 hours of study time. I was on cloud 9, I was motivated. I was happy, really happy!

This momentum propelled me through my study time with REG which I took on February 13th wearing my Chiefs dress shirt. If I failed, I'd have to retake not only REG but also AUD.

On February 24, 2020 I learned that I passed REG (with 20+ hours of study time). It took me 8 attempts to pass the 4 sections and yes, I know if I'd spend at least 30 hours studying for each of them then I'd most likely would have passed all on the first attempt. However, I'm not built like that, and working 50+ hours a week in public accounting at the time didn't help either.

To be fully honest, I didn't accomplish any work between February 13th and February 24th as I refreshed the score release website at least a million times. I've finally done it. This realization didn't sink in right away, I was so overwhelmed with emotion, joy and relief.

The process wasn't fully over yet, as I had to wait for the paperwork from the state's accountancy board and to finish the experience verification process and complete the ethics 8 hour CPE course. Besides the lack of publicly available information on this process as a whole that left me with huge amounts of anxiety, I found it very difficult to focus at work. Ethics exam was the worst part, having to get a 90% or higher just seemed tedious to me. Finally forced myself to take it in April and was officially awarded my CPA license on May 15th of 2020.

My only wish would be to have my Mother alive and with me to share in the celebration and because I know this would have made her so happy. However, some of my good friends here threw me a surprise party and I am so blessed to be surrounded by awesome people like them!

Normally this would result in me attending the initiation of new CPA members at the state Captiol but due to Covid, this was instead turned into a youtube digital video of just my picture and my name.

Looking back on it now, I am very proud of my journey. Finally accomplishing a goal that I've had for almost 20 years and at the same time seeing my beloved Chiefs win the Super Bowl is a memory that will never leave me.

My only advise for those trying to get their CPA is to take care of your mental health, be proactive in trying to avoid burn out and do not let the statistics intimidate your mindset. Use a study strategy that works best for you. For me, the video lectures was a far superior study method than spending hours on practice exam questions. But that's just for me and ignore the critics.

#cpa #CPAEXAM

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pixieminutes · 4 years

Text

Uncertain | KHJ

genre: angst, fluff, mafia!au

members: kim hongjoong x reader, brother!jung wooyoung, choi jongho, park seonghwa, jeong yunho

warnings: swearing, walking out

5th July, 2018

“i’m y/n,” you smiled.

“and she is my sister! which means that if any of you lay a hand on her–” wooyoung pulled his gun out of his pocket and smiled sweetly, “there we go.”

you laughed slightly, only hitting him when you saw he’d put the gun fully back into his pocket.

“and why is she here?” a man asked.

he had a mullet, dyed light brown and his ears were full of earrings.

“that’s hongjoong,” wooyoung whispered, “our leader.”

hongjoong raised his eyebrows at wooyoung expectantly and your brother coughed, spluttering his words out.

“well– she– i– you know,” wooyoung took a deep breath, “she’s here because i don’t want her to stay with our parents. if any of you had little siblings, you’d do the same, right?”

“wrong,” jongho said, “it’s actually my little siblings who are the evil ones. if i could get my parents away, i would. but, they won’t leave.”

wooyoung rolled his eyes, “except you.”

hongjoong sighed, “she can stay. she can eat breakfast, lunch and dinner with us. we have a room on the top floor and remind her she doesn’t need to clean any rooms.”

you furrowed your eyebrows, scoffing at hongjoong, “you know i’m right here, don’t you?”

wooyoung widened his eyes, beginning to drag you away by your shoulders, “ah, she’s joking hong—”

“no, it’s okay,” hongjoong chuckled, walking over so he was only centimetres away from your face, “she’s brave. i like it.”

“i’m not brave, i’m just calling you out,” you scoffed, “and sorry but, where’s my room? i kinda need a nap right now.”

hongjoong scoffed, nodding his head, grabbing your arm gently, “come with me.”

“i meant it hongjoong!” wooyoung called after the two of you.

hongjoong pulled the gun out of his pocket, not taking his attention off of your conversation.

wooyoung just rolled his eyes.

9th February, 2020

“where are you going?” you called.

hongjoong turned back to you, smiling sweetly with no meaning, “i’m going to get ice cream and frolick in the park.”

you rolled your eyes, sighing, “i was just asking.”

“i’m going out.”

“yes, but where?” you pushed.

“does it matter to you?!” hongjoong exclaimed, “jesus christ, can i not even leave without you bugging me?!”

you looked back to the clock in the kitchen, 19:14.

“fine,” you laughed dryly, “go. i won’t stay up.”

“no one asked you to.”

“be safe!” you called, “wherever the fuck you’re going.”

only three months after you’d moved in with ateez, you and hongjoong had made moves to take you far beyond just friends, despite wooyoung’s words. who was wooyoung to fight, though? his gang’s leader dating his sister was only to end in good things for him, especially with how much joy you brought to hongjoong.

brought. past tense.

since then, just under two years had passed and it had somewhat changed.

the hard, mafia leader hongjoong, who you managed to melt away until he was simply your boyfriend, had somehow bounced back.

now? you laid in bed alone, cold, and, underlining everything; lonely.

12th February, 2020

“where’s wooyoung?” hongjoong asked.

the six other members looked at each other, slight shrugs and shakes of their heads going between them before hongjoong shouted out, groaning loudly.

“where the fuck is that boy?!” he yelled, “i’ve had it with the jung family!”

“i’m here! hongjoong! i’m here! sorry!” wooyoung exclaimed, running in the room and sitting in his spot beside jongho.

“explanation?” hongjoong said simply, raising one eyebrow as he looked to the panting boy.

“there was a girl in my bed this morning,” wooyoung said, still trying to get his breath back, “it was not easy to explain why i had to go.”

hongjoong laughed cruely, “there was a girl in my bed this morning too. your sister. and just because your sister is in my bed, does not mean you get to fucking slack! do you understand?”

hongjoong’s voice was quiet, but exasperated, and it sent shivers down all the boys’ spines.

wooyoung nodded, gravely, “yes, hongjoong.”

“good,” he spat, “then we’ll continue.”

“what did you mean you’ve had it with the jung family?” seonghwa asked, “everything okay?”

“being particularly nosey, are we seonghwa?” hongjoong sighed.

seonghwa rolled his eyes, “no! i’m fucking worried about you, man! i don’t want your girl at home to be unsatisfying. that’s the worst thing a mafia leader could deal with.”

hongjoong scoffed, “it is, isn’t it?”

seonghwa laughed and nudged hongjoong’s shoulder, “so? care to tell me?”

“she’s just so fucking annoying,” hongjoong cried, “she’s so clingy and she always wants to cuddle?! like literally a couple weeks ago she came and climbed on my lap while i was working so we could cuddle. while i was working!”

seonghwa grimaced, “god. have you told her?”

“no. i’m trying to be a dick so i can let her down slowly. make her not want me until we’re at a mutual place.”

seonghwa nodded, the plan was cruel, but probably the best one a mafia leader could have come up with.

“what about wooyoung?” seonghwa asked.

“what about him?”

“well doesn’t it become a bit fucking awkward after you’ve hit it and quit it with his sister?”

hongjoong rolled his eyes, scoffing, “if he has a problem with it, he can leave. i’ll give her enough money to buy her own place, so she’ll be fine.”

seonghwa gasped, “wow! really? god, hongjoong, you’re so kind! i should be more like you.”

hongjoong smiled, “i try.”

27th February, 2020

“hongjoong,” you whined, leaving the warmth and comfort of your bed, seeing your boyfriend still sat at his desk, “why aren’t you in bed?”

“unlike some of us, i have to work, y/n,” hongjoong spat.

you pouted, “you stressed? you sound it. hold on, i’ll make you a warm drink.”

hongjoong went to protest, but you had already left the room. he sighed, he didn’t want a fucking hot drink, he wanted to be left alone.

you hummed as you made the chai tea, a special recipe you’d concocted yourself. using milk and spices and tea, it filled the house with a comforting smell and warmed you up to no end.

you put a couple of the egg tarts you’d made the previous day on a plate and poured the tea into a mug, walking back into hongjoong’s office and setting them beside him.

“it’s late you know,” you sighed.

hongjoong gritted his teeth, looking up at you with a piercing look.

you seemed oblivious, looking curiously round his office, you’d never stayed in here for long.

“i know you know that, though,” you chuckled, “i’m going back to bed, okay? don’t be too long.”

you approached your boyfriend, the man almost ready to burst at any second until you placed the tiniest kiss on his temple, leaving the room again, hongjoong hearing your bare feet pad up the stairs.

he looked at the plate and cup in front of him, taking a sip from the tea, a slight smile raised his lips. it reminded him of you, though he wasn’t sure why.

he sighed, leaning forward and taking a bite of the egg tart, “thank you.”

6th March, 2020

you sighed, watching your boyfriend leave again, for the fourth time that week.

picking up your phone, you pressed your brother’s contect, holding it to your ear as you walked upstairs to find the little belongings that belonged solely to you.

“what’s up!” wooyoung laughed, “i miss you, y/n.”

you sighed, “yeah, well you might be seeing me sooner than you think.”

“huh?” wooyoung asked, panic laced in his voiced, “w-what do you mean?”

a tear fell from your eye as you packed only the clothes you owned previous to knowing hongjoong, looking around your shared bedroom.

“i can’t do it,” you said, your voice shaky as you shook your head, “god, woo, i can’t— it’s like he doesn’t even know i’m here. i’m more like his maid. just for cooking and cleaning and fucking whenever he pleases.”

wooyoung sighed, unable to think of any words to say.

“every time i try and help him, i just have no reply,” you said, “i can’t do it anymore. i can’t help him. i actually think he might be heartless.”

“are you going to come here?” wooyoung asked.

he sounded fed-up, and just that thought alone made your heart sink. you felt bad. you felt so bad. but being with woo, it was just going to be better than ever being with hongjoong. you weren’t stupid.

“if that’s okay,” you said with a sigh, “i’ll find somewhere else as soon as possible.”

“it’s fine, y/n,” wooyoung said, “you coming now?”

“yeah,” you nodded, “yeah, i just need to write a note. i’m sorry if this gets you in any kind of—”

“don’t,” wooyoung said, “it’s fine. it’ll be awkward but, as long as i don’t do anything, he won’t.”

you nodded, “well. i’ll see you in a bit.”

wooyoung hummed, quickly hanging up.

you sighed, heading down to the kitchen, pulling the bag with you. you poured out a cup of homemade chai tea and the last remaining egg tart from the most recent batch. you quickly scribbled a note and left it underneath.

“ah!” you exclaimed, turning back only seconds after you began to leave, picking up the pen, “p.s. microwave the tea for 1 minute 40 seconds. that’s how you like it. y/n.”

you sighed, finally stepping out the front door once and for all. this was it. no regrets.

“i’m home,” hongjoong sighed, knowing that with the time on the clock you’d already have gone to bed.

he walked into the kitchen, scoffing as he saw the tea and the tart.

“what’s this?” he muttered, ripping the note out from underneath the plate, grabbing the tart as well so he could eat as he read.

hi hongjoong. welcome home i guess.

when you go upstairs, don’t expect to find me. i love you joong, i really do, but i can’t do this anymore. i try to love and care for you but all you do is push me further away.

maybe that was your plan. you’re just cruel like that, aren’t you? i should have expected it really, dating a mafia leader. still. i thought you’d changed. i guess not.

thanks for a happy two years hongjoong. i love you.

- y/n

p.s. microwave the tea for 1 minute 40 seconds. that’s how you like it - y/n

hongjoong dropped the note, looking to the tea and the tart in front of him. this was what he wanted. this is what he was trying to do, but now he wasn’t sure.

he rushed upstairs, going into the bedroom where, sure enough, you weren’t.

on every normal day he’d come home, he’d walk into the bedroom, switch the light on, switch it off when he realised you were asleep, shake your snow globe and kiss you once before going downstairs to continue work.

now, however, he could turn the light on, artificially brightening the room, and not have to turn it back off. you weren’t there.

he turned to look at the snow globe, one you’d bought when hongjoong took you to disneyland for your 100 day anniversary. it wasn’t there.

hongjoong walked downstairs limply, no thoughts running through his head as he came back in the kitchen, placing the tea in the microwave for 1 minute and 40 seconds, slowly eating the egg tart as he waited and thought.

this is what he wanted. he’d planned it all out in his head. but now it had happened, now his plan had worked and you had gone. was this really it?

...maybe that was your plan. you’re just cruel like that, aren’t you?

hongjoong swore as he crouched down, holding his face in his hands. yes, he was cruel. he was so, so cruel and now he was left to suffer in the aftermath by himself. alone.

15th March, 2020

“morning,” wooyoung said, a slight smile as he handed you a cup of coffee, “how you feeling?”

you sighed, your eyes filling with tears as you looked back on the situations of the past week. although you were the one who walked out, and he was the one who did wrong, a small part of you couldn’t help but want him to come and find you.

“not well, huh?” your brother said, patting your head slightly, “it’s okay. heartbreak sucks.”

“like you’d know!” you exclaimed.

“what’s that supposed to mean!” wooyoung shouted.

“ya! don’t shout at me!” you shouted.

“you’re doing it to me too!”

“um, guys?” yunho said, knocking at the door slightly, “y/n, there’s someone here for you.”

“for me?” you asked, getting out of bed, a confused look on your face, “well i guess i did tell nari about the situation.”

yunho shook his head, “it’s not nari. just go. i think you’ll be glad.”

you furrowed your eyebrows, watching as he walked away, before making your own way to the front door.

“hello?” you asked, seeing no one there.

you poked your head round, and saw a figure sat on the swinging chair outside. a figure you know all too well.

“y/n,” he said, “ca– can we talk? for a bit?”

you sighed, pushing the door closed behind you and walking to sit next to him.

“i guess you got my note,” you said.

hongjoong sighed, nodding, “yeah.”

it fell silent, as you saw hongjoong fiddle with his fingers and take several deep breaths, as though he was trying to psych himself up.

“i– i—” hongjoong stuttered, before sighing and trying again, “i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry, y/n, you have no idea.”

your eyes filled with tears again as you looked forward, trying not to let him see.

“truthfully, i did think it would be better for you to leave but then you did leave and now i don’t know why!” he said, sniffling slightly and as you turned, you could see he was wiping away a couple tears secretly, “i’m an idiot. i know i am.”

you chuckled humourlessly, staring down at both of your feet. hongjoong was wearing his doc martens, you: your inside slippers.

“and i understand what i’ve done, so i understand if you wouldn’t take me back,” hongjoong said, nodding solemly as your eyes went to his face, watching for his expression, “but it’s been over a week now. it’s been eight days. and i have done zero work because every day i get home and i cry so hard because you’re not there. and every little thing that i didn’t want you to do before– i– i miss it so much.”

a tear fell down his face and you wiped it away, giving up on trying to control your own.

“i want you to come and make me tea and pastries and i want you to come and sit on my lap while i work and i want you to cuddle me when we’re asleep and i want you to clean me up after i’ve got wounds from a mission. i want it all! i want you.”

you sighed, “you didn’t like it before.”

hongjoong sniffled, tucking some hair behind your ear, “i did. god, i did. but after that defeat from stray kids, i felt inferior and so– so i brought the mafia leader image home as well. i wasn’t being kim hongjoong with you. but i am now, i am kim hongjoong and i want you back in my life. please.”

you wiped away his tears, placing a hand on his cheek and leaning forward to press a soft kiss to his lips.

“truthfully? i’ve been waiting for you every day since i left,” you sighed, “i didn’t even take all my stuff.”

hongjoong chuckled, “i thought you did that to be cruel.”

you laughed, climbing onto his lap, the way you used to when he was working, “i missed you, hongjoong. and i don’t just mean in the past week.”

hongjoong nodded, “i missed you, in the past week, more than i’ve ever missed someone before. but... i know, and i missed me too. i’m so, so glad to be back.”

you chuckled, kissing him again, “it’s good to see you again, hongjoong-ah. don’t go away again. promise?”

hongjoong smiled, linking his pinky finger with yours.

“i promise.”

165 notes · View notes

jasonbehrs · 3 years

Photo

let me be your guarantee

by airauralintensity (aka me, jasonbehrs!)

"You could stand to be a bit more selfish, you know."

"You could stand to be a bit more courteous in general, so I guess we both have things we need to work on."

fandom: kpop, super junior characters: ryeowook, kyuhyun ship: kyuwook genre: friendship, romance themes: genderbent, rule 63, high school, a day in the life, fluff (arguable) word count: 5.2k

read it below or on ffnet, wattpad, aff, or (new!) ao3

A/N (8.27.2021): I have no heterosexual explanation for the effects Ryeowook and Kyuhyun in drag have on me (or my creative process, evidently).

Rating for mildly suggestive language and graphic depictions of geometry. Title comes from Poster Girl by the Backstreet Boys. Cover art made by me. Thanks to Amy for the beta! (Even though you're already so over high school, haha.)

Uploading this as part of kyuwook month on twitter! I actually was gonna publish it wayyy back on July 21, but I waited so I could participate in ryeonamickyuo's #kyuwooksaturdays event on twitter lol. #marketing

~~~

A soothing chime alarm wakes Ryeowook up before dawn. She lets herself stretch in bed, enjoying the warm comfort of her blankets for a moment longer before getting up for a shower. She changes into the outfit she had prepared the night before: a sparkly white sweater and a pink skirt fluffed with tulle, and she painstakingly dries and curls her long lavender hair just the way she likes it before applying some light makeup. After scrutinising her appearance for another minute, she decides to add a small braid to her hair for fun.

With ease and minimal noise, Ryeowook flits through the kitchen to make enough breakfast for her and her parents. She's feeling like sweet potatoes and tofu this morning. She leaves her parents' portions in the oven to stay warm before serving herself, and she mentally checks through yesterday's to-do list to make sure she's all set for today while she chews.

Her homework is printed and neatly filed in their own plastic sleeves as a sustainable alternative to staples.

The cinnamon rolls she made the night before, with a small batch of gluten-free versions set aside, are individually packed in a tin waiting in the fridge.

After she brushes her teeth and puts on her silver flats, she'll be all ready for the walk to school.

Satisfied with her preparations, Ryeowook hums softly to herself as she washes the dishes after eating. With the sink by the kitchen window, she is able to catch the first rays of sunlight streak across the brightening sky, and she smiles. Today is going to be a good day.

~~~

Today is already a shit day.

The alarm blares once again after snoozing it for the third time just as someone bangs on her door, and the annoying sunlight shining through her bedroom window manages to directly hit her eyes. Kyuhyun frowns into her pillow. She was having an excellent dream about kimchi ramen that is already slipping out of her grasp the more she joins the land of the conscious.

She spares a second to flip the bird in Ahra's direction, knowing full well her older sister won't see it through the closed door, before rummaging through her unruly closet for whatever passes the sniff test. She changes into a pleather bodycon skirt (just long enough to meet the school's dress code, but no longer) and a long-sleeve red crop top in a half-awake daze.

Kyuhyun offhandedly recalls she left her homework in the printer last night. Hopefully she remembers to stuff that in her bag before she leaves.

Not one for morning showers, she simply runs a brush through her silky blonde hair a few times just to get the birds' nests out, wipes the oil off her face, and swipes on a thick cat eye to complete her look.

At the breakfast table, Kyuhyun eats in silence while ignoring the looks her dad gives her, no doubt at her mildly revealing outfit. She gives him a side hug anyway before leaving her dishes in the sink for later. She finishes her morning routine, grabs her keys and homework, and shuts the door behind her when she leaves for school.

~~~

Ryeowook cheerily pushes open the school doors with plenty of time left before the first bell. Instead of her locker, she walks purposefully through the hallways for the principal's office.

"Good morning, Ryeowook!" the matronly receptionist-cum-secretary greets when she sees Ryeowook sweep in.

"Good morning, Mrs. Oh!" Ryeowook chirps. "How has your hypoglycemia been treating you?" she asks as she gathers the paperwork she needs for her homeroom duties.

"Probably better if I remembered to eat breakfast in the mornings," Mrs. Oh responds with good humour, pushing her butterfly-themed sunglasses further up the bridge of her nose.

"I thought you might say that," Ryeowook says while rummaging through her bag. "Here, I made these last night. It's gluten-free, and you can't even tell!" She offers a cinnamon roll from her tin, and she smiles at the way Mrs. Oh lights up at the sight.

"Oh, Ryeowook! You're such a dear!" Mrs. Oh effuses.

Ryeowook bows in acknowledgement and waves goodbye, the papers for homeroom loose in her hand. She finally makes her way to her locker—the inside decorated with magnets, pictures, and a helpful calendar—so that she can get the books she'll need for all her pre-lunch classes.

In the hallways, she is greeted at every turn.

"Hey, Ryeowook! I hope you had a great weekend!" "I did, thanks! Happy Monday!"

"Oh my god, your outfit is completely adorable. It really brings out the lavender of your hair." "Wow, you think? I'll invest in more pink then~"

"Thanks so much for helping with the banner last week! It was a hit at our event; everyone wanted a photo with it." "No problem; I'm so glad to hear that! Like I always say, there's no such thing as too much glitter!"

These microtransactions of joy she gets while walking through the halls energise her like nothing else. She loves being helpful and knowing people care about her enough to say hi. It makes her life as a member of the school's community and as a student leader so fulfilling.

She makes it into homeroom with a minute to spare, sets her stuff at her desk, then places the tin of cinnamon rolls on the teachers' desk for everyone's enjoyment.

The bell rings, and the wattage turns up on her smile. "Good morning!" she calls out, easily cutting through the chatter with her high and bright voice. "There are cinnamon rolls at the front for everyone. Feel free to grab some while I take attendance. The ones swirled in a clockwise pattern are gluten free, so please save them for those with that dietary restriction!"

The typical gratitudes spill out—"Oh my god, these taste amazing." "You're so thoughtful, Ryeowook!" "Please marry me."—and she preens at the praise as she goes down the list in her hand.

It isn't until she gets to a specific name near the top, until she doesn't hear the typical 'Present!' that should follow, that she gives her first frown of the day.

She quickly shakes it off and finishes up, returning to her seat with every intention to rehearse her presentation one more time before the bell ending homeroom rings.

~~~

Kyuhyun steps into school right after the warning bell for first period rings, and she seamlessly joins the throngs of people hustling to their first class.

Well, she would join them, if there were throngs to join. Students stop in their tracks and fall silent as soon as they sense her presence, causing nearby students to quiet in confusion then in understanding such that a bubble of non-motion and non-noise follows her as she walks. The typical morning chatter resumes at a lowered volume from a safe distance of six feet behind her, and she is vain enough to presume at least 40% of those conversations are about her.

The stares go unacknowledged of course. So do the hapless love declarations from desperate freshmen and presumptive date offers from cocky upperclassmen. They might as well have said, "Kyuhyun, I bet you don't have better things to do with your time than stroke my ego and go dutch on an oily dinner at a chain restaurant after school." As if.

While leaving another potential suitor in the dust, a janitor accidentally turns on an industrial fan facing her direction just as she takes off her sunglasses. Coupled with the paused state of her classmates, her languid pace through the hall looks like a slow-motion runway walk that even Naomi Campbell in her prime would envy.

Kyuhyun's locker is empty save for the jacket she just shoved into it, then she goes straight to her first class of the day. She slides into her seat—not all the way in the back; cliche, much?—and, as if on cue, the whispers start.

"Do you think her hair is natural?' "Of course not, look at her eyebrows." "She could be dyeing her eyebrows!"

"I heard she drives to school? I thought only third-years and up were allowed to do that!" "I don't think allowances are all it takes to stop someone like her."

"Cho Kyuhyun in red should be one of the seven deadly sins." "That sin already exists, and it's called 'lust,' bro." "No no no no no. There's lust, and there's Cho Kyuhyun in red."

Strangers referring to you by your full name in some sort of layman's equivalent of a celebrity mononym has such a satisfying, powerful feel to it. Alas, save for a sly smirk, these too are ignored.

The smirk is promptly wiped off her face as soon as the teacher walks in, as if their life's greatest joy is teaching 16 year-olds about Korean peninsular history at 8:30 in the morning, and Kyuhyun already lolls her head back in disinterest.

~~~

Ryeowook snaps her hand up, a lone beacon of preparedness in a sea of bored or anxious faces.

"Thanks for volunteering, Ryeowook! Whenever you're ready." The teacher gestures to the podium with a sweep of their hands, pleased with the student's enthusiasm.

Ryeowook flounces out of her seat to the front of the classroom and loads up her presentation on the laptop hooked up to the projector. "S.E.S. as a Pop Culture Juggernaut" appears on screen in bold letters, and the subtle sounds of rustling fill the classroom as students sit up in interest.

"Good morning, everyone! Today I'm going to present on the seminal idol girl group S.E.S. Through interdisciplinary and anthropological analysis, I will illustrate how the mark they've left on Korean culture at the time of their debut carries ripple effects on the entertainment industry that can be observed to this day."

She takes a moment to look over the surprised and interested faces of her classmates and teacher, then smiles internally. She's going to crush this.

She clicks to the next slide. "S.E.S. is a girl group that debuted in 1997 under SM Entertainment. That may seem like a fairly innocuous sentence on its own; in which case, I'll inform you that they are the first girl group ever debuted in K-pop history…"

When the class learned their Forensics and Communication midterm assignment would be free-form, many of her classmates asked if she'd partner with them for a debate. Their topics were interesting enough. She would have customarily had little problem arguing on the cost-benefit analysis of a college education or the validity of prison sentences served overseas (to name a few).

But she graciously turned them all down. In her heart, she knew she'd simply enjoy it more if she gave a presentation on something more personal… and studies show passion for your work drives results. She expects nothing less than an A+.

Thanks to the confident excitement lacing her voice and a powerpoint that took her two weeks to perfect, she handily grabs the interest and attention of every student in the class, even the ones typically uninterested in idol culture. She winds up leading the class in a discussion on the inherent greater interest the Korean general public reserves for girl groups in contrast to the supersaturated boy band market, and the teacher has to regretfully cut them short to allow for the other midterm assignments that had to be seen that day.

"Thanks again, Ryeowook, for that illuminating and impassioned presentation! Why don't we keep that energy going, hmm? I know it may seem like a tough act to follow, but who's ready to present next?"

Expecting the worst, the teacher is pleasantly surprised when a majority of the class raises their hands to volunteer. The teacher looks over at Ryeowook and sends a quick wink in thanks, and Ryeowook gives a thumbs up in acknowledgement.

~~~

Kyuhyun clicks 'downvote' on a thread in the r/poppunk subreddit. As if Retrieve Me the Skyline has anything on Querying Quinn.

Just then, she senses a presence walk up to her desk. She lifts her eyes up from her phone—hidden behind an obviously strategically upright notebook in a semblance of respect for the teacher—to find said teacher looking at her disapprovingly. She sighs without remorse and puts her cellphone away, not one to fight once she's caught red-handed.

"Thank you, Ms. Cho. Now, as I was saying: Just like how Korean borrows from Chinese and English words, English borrows words from many other cultures. This is part of why their grammar rules are so inconsistent. Therefore, it may be helpful to learn the etymology of certain words to reinforce these rules. For example, 'geese' is the plural form of 'goose' because 'goose' was borrowed from German, and Proto-Germanic grammar does allow for plural forms for their nouns. On the other hand, 'moose' does not pluralise to 'meese' because it was borrowed from an Indigenous American language which did not pluralise their nouns."

Kyuhyun barely has the presence of mind to suppress a groan. If this is supposed to be an English class, why is the teacher talking about German all of a sudden? She isn't gaining any more while paying attention as she was while scrolling on her phone! This is why she doesn't bother. It would take her less time and less effort to simply read the textbook.

Honestly, that's how she usually spends her classes. She's not against learning necessarily—if she has to be here, she might as well—but she is against the fluff shit that most teachers feel the need to sprinkle in to keep people's attention or reinforce learning. If it's not going to be on the national exam at the end of the year, it's just a waste of time.

It doesn't help that Kyuhyun's a whole league above the mouthbreathers in this high school anyway. What other people need several hours of studying to understand sinks in for her after a single lecture. She has the makings to be every teacher's dream student, but she's made it very clear: Don't make her participate in class, and she won't eviscerate their self-esteem in exchange. It's an elegant system with an 87.5% success rate.

As her schedule has it, the only class where it doesn't work is her next one. The phys ed grade is almost entirely predicated on participation; and unfortunately for her, the venn diagram of men who have already had their insecurities abused to the point of desensitisation by their superiors during conscription and men who decide to become high school PE teachers seems to be a circle.

Her solution for this class is admittedly less elegant.

Even as the next period is just about to begin and the halls thin out, Kyuhyun still manages to easily breeze past the bumbling office receptionist trying to prevent her from leaving the grounds during school hours.

(Hey, she's gonna get a 0 for participation whether she's wasting time sitting on the bleachers and bored out of her mind or whether she's going to the mall to grab the new Napping with Nixies album. Might as well do the fun one. Bonus: instead of paying the Korean public school system for the rehydrated prison rations they consider 'food,' she can grab lunch at the foodcourt!)

~~~

Ryeowook spends her lunch period like a jetsetting CEO, the precious few minutes taken up by meetings with various teachers, students, and—today—even an administrator.

"Thanks so much for taking the time to meet with me, Ryeowook."

"Of course, Mr. Park! I'm happy to represent the needs of my class. Let me know if I can help with this initiative again later once it gains more momentum."

"I certainly will. Have a good rest of your day, Ms. Kim," Mr. Park replies warmly, his deep voice and barrel-chested physique radiating authority and paternity.

The administrator walks her out of his office, and they bow to each other at the door. The clock in the hallway tells her there is barely any time to make it to the cafeteria and eat a meal, so she sighs and resignedly walks back to her locker to exchange her books with the ones she'd need for her post-lunch classes.

She remembers there is a vending machine along the way to her next classroom, so she pivots her route slightly so that she can pick up a granola bar and a bottle of water. They'll be easy to finish before class starts.

"You know, you'd have time to eat a real lunch and attend your precious meetings if they just expanded our lunch hour to be an actual hour," a voice says from behind her just as she feeds a paper bill into the machine.

"I don't mind. It means we have more time spent in our classes."

She bends at the knee to retrieve her purchases then gracefully hops back up to twirl on her heel, steadfastly ignoring the other's presence as she continues on her way.

"I think we can definitely stand to spend less time in class. Come on; we already sacrifice the most formative years of our lives confined to these 'hallowed halls,' and they can't even let us digest our meals properly?" her nuisance heckles as Ryeowook is followed.

"I bet the Student Council would love to have an impassioned, opinionated person such as yourself on the panel. If you have ideas for change, you're free to share them with people who are empowered to do something about it," Ryeowook comments mildly, gaze trained forward even as the other pulls up beside her.

"The student council is a mockery of democracy and only serves as a mere figurehead for the students' collective political and bartering power to the school administration, and you know it."

Finally, Ryeowook stops. She squares her shoulders and looks her antagoniser in the eye. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't mock an extracurricular about which I'm very passionate to my face, Kyuhyun-ssi."

The taller smirks. "As much as you'd appreciate time to sit and eat lunch with your friends for once?"

They are not alone in the hallway they've entered into. With an almost imperceptible turn of her head, Ryeowook can even see some students eavesdropping on their conversation, eager to hypothesise with their friends what the two most popular girls in school yet for completely opposite reasons are doing talking to each other.

"Hey, isn't that Kim Ryeowook?" "Talking to Cho Kyuhyun?" "Hold up, they know each other?"

If she could hear them, then they could certainly hear her, and that reminder is enough to reign in her annoyance. She allows herself ten seconds to collect her composure.

When she speaks again, her voice is airy and pleasant. "Well, if that's all, I have to go and spend what's left of my lunch period doing something a little more constructive than arguing with someone who'd rather complain than make the best of a situation. If you'll excuse me."

"You should have gotten fig newtons!" Kyuhyun calls as Ryeowook moves around her. Ryeowook counts it as a small blessing that the other does not follow. "They're easier to eat in class! Less noisy."

"You're not allowed to eat food in class," Ryeowook retorts plainly without even turning her head.

She can feel the other's eyes on her as she walks away, but she ignores it as she takes a swig of her water.

(She finishes her bar before crossing the threshold of the classroom, arriving before even the teacher does and finding a half of a sandwich wrap from the deli across the street waiting on her desk.)

~~~

The surface of Kyuhyun's desk is empty save for her arms and elbows organised to support her languid daydreaming. Outside the window, she watches as three red cars pass by.

More so than her other subjects, math just makes sense to her without even trying. There's less up for interpretation, there are consistent and logical rules, and patterns are clearer with numbers.

If she doesn't need to try, then why would she? So she hands in passable attempts at homework, texts throughout lecture, and is generally unresponsive during the class. Ms. Kang would love nothing more than to suspend her for insubordination and churlishness; but Kyuhyun is her best student by far, and they both know it.

"If the altitude of right triangle ABC intersects with the hypotenuse at D, what equation is always true?"

In fact, Kyuhyun would want to skip this class too, but there's just something about its specific learning environment that keeps her attending lesson after lesson.

In her periphery, the student in front of her and one row over hurriedly draws out the question in her notebook to analyse it. She raises her hand in excitement a moment later.

"Yes, Ryeowook?" "AD over AC is equal to AC over BD!"

Kyuhyun suppresses a scoff. The teacher smiles sympathetically, knowing that Ryeowook is doing her best, and says, "Sorry, but no."

Ryeowook pouts. "Aigoooo," she intones as she looks back at her drawing, no doubt trying to understand where she went wrong.

Encouraged by Ryeowook's attempt, more students try their hand at the problem.

"AC over AD equals BD over BC?" "Nope."

"AD over CD equals DB over CD!" "If you bothered to write that down, you'd immediately see why that cannot possibly be the correct answer."

The class lapses into silence, and Ms. Kang begins calling out desperately. "Anyone? Anyone else?" When it was apparent no one else knew the answer, she sighs. "Kyuhyun?"

"AD over AC is equal to CD over BC," she recites boredly, gaze still trained beyond the window. Forget being capable of immediately answering a direct question; if anyone had been observing her during this lesson, they would have thought she wasn't even paying attention at all.

"That is correct," the teacher admits begrudgingly. "Remember class, due to the AA Similarity Postulate…"

Kyuhyun lets the teacher's words drift in one ear and out the other, heeding no further sounds until the bell rings.

The end of the school day is finally upon them.

As much as she looks forward to this point every day, she sits in her chair and lets every other student file out first before packing her things. She's in no rush.

Kyuhyun drops her bookbag off at her locker and wanders the halls aimlessly instead, spending extra time in the art corridor to see the latest student works. The freshmen are working on watercolours, apparently.

After an unfortunate encounter in the bathroom, she beelines for the cafeteria, which happens to be in a completely other building, and runs into the second-to-last person she wants to see right now.

"What are you still doing here, Ms. Cho?" Mr. Park asks with suspicion.

"Just hanging out," she says with a shrug.

"I know you refuse to partake in any of our extracurriculars, but don't you have something better to do than loiter? I'm sure you have homework or some such."

"Maybe if this school started offering a curriculum that actually required me to reinforce what I learned at home, I would."

Mr. Park's eyes narrow in contempt. "Whatever delinquent nonsense you're up to, do it outside of my high school!" he bellows.

Kyuhyun's phone buzzes in her hand just then, and she uses the same hand to offer a sarcastic salute. "Your wish, Mr. Park," she offers in parting before rushing as fast as she can to her locker. She can't wait to get home.

~~~

When her home's doorbell rings its seasonal chime, Ryeowook is several pages deep into her biology packet. She begrudgingly sets down her work and gets up to look out the window.

Her view is exasperating.

"You weren't in homeroom this morning… again," she says in lieu of a greeting, walking back to where she was doing homework in the living room after letting in the guest.

"Babe, don't be like that," the guest whines while she takes off her shoes. "You know that homeroom is a gigantic waste of time. It's just Big Academia's way of—"

"—'Training students to get used to being herded like cattle,' yeah yeah. Tell it to someone who cares."

"Oh? This isn't a suggestion I should take to your precious student council?"

"I don't have time for you right now. I have a whole biology packet to complete before I can start baking," Ryeowook says as she waves said packet in the air for emphasis.

Kyuhyun pouts with her whole face. "Why bother letting me over if you're not even going to pay attention to me!"

Ryeowook sighs and repositions her laptop to rest on the arm of the couch, invitation unspoken. Kyuhyun drops her petulant act immediately and happily trods over to stretch out on the couch and rest her head on her girlfriend's lap. She wiggles in place to get comfortable and pulls out her phone. Ryeowook's typing provides a light, inconsistent soundtrack to her mindless scrolling; and it feels nice.

"How'd your presentation go?" she asks after a while.

"I almost accidentally commandeered the whole period because people were so excited about my topic." Ryeowook tried going for deadpan, but the pride in her voice was unmistakable.

"Well, duh. No one can listen to you talk about something you're interested in and stay indifferent."

"Yeah, it's cool how emotions are infectious," Ryeowook comments offhandedly.

"Sure, but I meant specifically you. You're, like, the most passionate person I know. I bet you had the best topic out of anyone there, anyway."

Ryeowook doesn't reply, but Kyuhyun cranes her neck just enough to watch a grateful and pleased smile cross the other's face.

Satisfied with how awesome of a girlfriend she is, she keeps going. "Did you like the wrap?"

Kyuhyun can somehow feel the change a split-second before she hears it. "It was delicious; thank you; and never do it again," Ryeowook responds with a clipped tone.

Kyuhyun rolls her eyes. "Stop sacrificing your lunch time for things that can be handled over email, and maybe I will."

"I meant skipping class; and don't even try to deny it!" Ryeowook adds as soon as she hears Kyuhyun's sharp intake of breath in preparation for a non-sequitur argument. "I know you. You thought to do it only because you passed by the deli on your way back from wherever truant kids spend their time."

"Napping with Nixies released a new album," Kyuhyun defends.

"And the store would have still had copies for you to buy during the weekend," Ryeowook retorts.

"First day sales are important, Ryeowook!"

"So is your education, Kyuhyun!" Ryeowook parrots back in the same whining tone.

"Spoken like a true cog in Big Academia's machine."

"This sentence probably won't make sense to a self-inflicted lone wolf, but collaboration happens best in person. And I prefer a small lunch anyway." Ryeowook tacks on that last bit like an afterthought. Kyuhyun might have believed her, except she's seen the way Ryeowook packs for picnic dates and knows that statement to be patently untrue.

"You could stand to be a bit more selfish with your time, you know."

"You could stand to be a bit more courteous in general, so I guess we both have things we need to work on," Ryeowook fires back easily.

Kyuhyun strikes the couch with her arms in offense. "I'm plenty courteous! I bought you lunch 'cause I knew you wouldn't have had a real meal otherwise!"

"I meant to people that aren't me!" Ryeowook clarifies exasperatedly.

"Hmph. People that aren't you don't deserve it. It's like Kanye-sunbaenim says: 'Asshole to the world but never to your girl.'"

"… I don't know what's worse: that I'm dating a girl that gets her love advice from Kanye West or the fact that I had to hear the phrase 'Kanye-sunbaenim' with my own two ears."

"Well, what if I told you I also get my life advice from Kimmy K-unnie? That way it counts as women empowerment. Don't you like that kind of stuff?"

Ryeowook finally tears her focus away from her work to eye Kyuhyun incredulously.

Kyuhyun innocently looks up through her eyelashes to meet the other's gaze. "Well if you're not into what I'm posting, don't look."

Mercilessly, Ryeowook shoves Kyuhyun off her lap. "Goodbye," she says as she places her laptop back on her folded legs.

Kyuhyun scrambles up from the floor and looks at the laptop with thinly veiled disdain and jealousy. "Let me back!"

"Not until you're nicer to people."

"I'm nice to people! Today, I heard Yom Syejin gossipping in the bathroom that the only way I could have avoided detention this year is by blowing Mr. Park, and I managed to walk away without dunking her head in the toilet. That seems plenty nice to me."

"Excuse me, Yom Syejin said what?!"

Ah shit, Kyuhyun knew she shouldn't have said anything. This is what she gets for thinking humourous delivery is enough to mask unfortunate content.

"Really, it's not a big deal. I handled it," Kyuhyun maintains.

"I'm sure you did, honey. Come on, help me bake some snickerdoodles," Ryeowook says as she immediately heads into the kitchen.

This would be an excellent idea, except that Kyuhyun can clearly see Ryeowook's biology packet is still unfinished and that Ryeowook's tone of voice sounded disingenuously peppy.

~~~

Ryeowook makes it into homeroom the next day with a minute to spare, sets her stuff at her desk, then places a tin of snickerdoodles on the teachers' desk for everyone's enjoyment.

The bell rings, and the wattage turns up on her smile. "Good morning!" she calls out, easily cutting through the chatter with her high and bright voice. "There are snickerdoodles at the front for everyone. Feel free to grab some while I take attendance. I didn't have time last night to make as many as I wanted to, so I evenly divided the batch into goodie bags for you all! I wrote your names on them too, so please only take one. I'll know if you don't," she faux-threatens with a cute wink.

The typical gratitudes spill out—"You're the best!" "Thanks, Ryeowook!" "Please marry me?"—and she preens at the praise as she goes down the list in her hand.

It isn't until she notices one person in particular eagerly grabbing her designated bag that Ryeowook lets a private smile cross her face.

~~~

from: Kyuhyun-ssi (Geometry) oh my god yom skank-jin just bolted out of my english class like the new galaxy was on sale tf?

from: wookie💜 Maybe if you bothered attending homeroom this morning, you'd have an answer to your crudely-phrased question.

from: Kyuhyun-ssi (Geometry) oh my god what did you do

from: wookie💜 Did you know Syejinnie's favourite cookies are snickerdoodles?

from: Kyuhyun-ssi (Geometry) OH MY GOD WHAT DID YOU DO

from: wookie💜 Bathrooms are for shitting, not shit-talking.

from: Kyuhyun-ssi (Geometry) i am madly in love with you

from: wookie💜 Stop texting me and pay attention in class!

from: wookie💜 And I love you too 💛

~~~

A/N (8.27.2021): Thanks for reading! To prove my thanks, here is fanart that almost made it into the cover photo.

#super junior #super junior fanfiction #kyuwook #kyuhyun #ryeowook #cho kyuhyun #kim ryeowook #jaso*

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hobbitsnapes · 4 years

Text

The Red Hoods Protègè chapter 19

Older Damian Wayne x ofc

(Photo made by my lovely friend @inspeech)

Summary:Red Hood has taken a young vigilante under his wing and subsequently changes Damians life forever.

Tags: @comic-nerd-dc @comic-brew @psychovigilantewrites @psych0crybaby

Her feet padded lightly against the floor, the sound the only noise in the room. Everyone was downstairs, from what she could hear there was an electrical issue with the computers that she totally didn’t tell them about last week when the screen went black by itself.

She came across one of the shelves in the large family room, it held a large binder booklet. It was definitely old, having collected a layer of dust over it. She brushed it off to reveal a sticker on the cover. ‘Family photos’ it wrote. She examined the handwriting, from the looks of it, it was Alfreds. But it also looked a lot like her fathers. Upon further inspection it was alfreds, the writing was finer. She noticed the pen was lightly written onto the paper with more fluid lines and less indentation from the pressure of the pen. Her father had beautiful writing, but his was heavier. The lines were thicker, and you could feel the indentation of the pen whenever he wrote.

She picked up the large book, nearly dropping it due to the heavy weight. It wasn’t so heavy that it was a struggle, but definitely had more weight than she assumed.

She sat down on the couch, placing the book on her lap which she brought up onto the seat.

Opening up the cover, she spotted writing on the side of it. They were names, all in different handwriting.

The first name written was Richard, Jason, Barbara, Tim, steph, and finally Damian. Out of all of them, Damian's writing was the neatest. Almost looking like he typed it out and printed it. But she could feel the small amount of indentation when she ran her fingers over it.

The first photo was of a, family. There were only 3 people in the photo. The mother and father were crouched down on either side of their son. The mother had blonde hair that was pulled into a bun. The father had dark hair that was slightly curly. Both had wide smiles on their face that reached their eyes. In the middle was a boy, he had jet black hair, a small smile, and blue eyes. In front of the boy was a cake, with the number 8 in a large candle in the middle.

She felt a sinking suspicion that she knew who they were, and when she looked above the fireplace, her question was answered. There was a large photo of Tomas and Martha Wayne, with a young Bruce in between them. Her heart pulled slightly when she looked back down. Down at the happy family, with the young boy who had no idea what was to shortly come for him in months time. Her heart pulled further when she looked at the small boy. There was the eyes of an innocent boy who’s eyes shined with light and joy. Now his eyes were tired, empty. Even when she saw him happy, he lacked the pure joy and life that he once had. It was painful to look at, to see how different he had become.

She turned the page to see another boy. He looked an awful lot like Bruce, but it was obvious it wasn’t. He was older than the photo of Bruce, but still a young boy. He had a scowl on his face at the camera, which caused her to chuckle. Her laughter was cut when she noted the dark circles under his eyes. His overall demeanor screamed he was tired. She looked down at the corner of the page to see a small bit of writing. Her eyes widened slightly when she saw it was dick. She had only seen the man with a bright smile. Always looking so full of life, he looked like the sun shined out his ass every morning. It was shocking, seeing how angry he looked then. How she wished she could go back in time to tell the young boy how happy he will be. And how great he is to come.

She flipped the page to the next, letting out a laugh at the photo. She knew exactly who it was without thinking. With the bright strawberry blonde hair and the bright green blue eyes. It was hilarious to see, she was so used to seeing her father as a large, muscular man with scars on his face. He was a small, scrawny little boy with curly blonde hair.

“I see you’ve found the family photo booklet.” Alfred said, making her jump and turn around at the man. He had a small smile on his face, with a cup in his hand.

He walked over to her, sitting beside her and set his tea down onto the table. “That, was your father when he was adopted. He was overjoyed that day. I couldn’t help but take his photo.” He said, a fond smile on his face.

He flipped to the next page to see Tim. He was younger then, around the same age as the last few. His hair was short, almost a military length. It was odd, he didn’t have the dark runner eyes that he does now, and his hair wasn’t long like now. “This was, when master Tim became robin. He had finally convinced master Bruce that he need a robin after,” “I know, Tim told me all about it. It’s fine, if it wasn’t for what happened. I wouldn’t have met my dad, or any of you.” She said, looking over to him with a small smile.

The next page was turned, to a photo of Damian. She stifled a laugh at the photo. He was definitely very young here, no older than 11. But he looked like he had lived through 40 years. He had a tight scowl on his face, hard eyes that bore into the camera. Unlike dicks photo who looked angry and hurt, Damian just looked like an angry cat. But what she couldn’t get by, was his hair. Since she’s known him, he’s always had practically the same hairstyle. His sides are either short, or shaved. The hair at the top of his head was longer, and pulled back. Sometimes the longer hairs would fall into his face and be curly, but nothing like this. His hair was almost spiky. It wasn’t styled that was, it was obviously naturally that way. She couldn’t hold in her laughter anymore, throwing her head back against the couch. Alfred chuckled along with her, trying to stop his chuckles with his hand. “Master Damian, had that hair until he was 16.” Alfred laughed, causing her to laugh even harder.

They kept going through the booklet, laughing at some of the photos. But when they got through about 10 more, the photos stopped. She looked over to him, her head slightly tilted in question. “That’s it?” She asks, noting the book to have probably hundreds of more pages. “I’m afraid so, we stopped taking them a few years ago. We really only took them when the boys were younger, and when master Damian grew older, we just gave up.” He sighed, his head tilted down. She put her hand against his shoulder, causing the elderly man to look up at her. “Then I’m gonna start it up again. Just because they’re all grown up, doesn’t mean we can’t have more memories. I’m gonna fill this booklet up.”

As she walked down the hallway back to her room, she was tackled to the ground. The air was knocked out of her lungs when she hit, letting out a small yell when a heavy force was on top of her. She nearly threw whatever the threat was off of her, until she felt it’s tongue licking her face. She laughed out as Titus slobbered all over her, trying to get his drool away from her mouth. “Hey buddy, ohh I’ve missed you so much!” She cooed, scratching behind the dogs ears. He flopped off of her onto his back, raising his legs in the air. She rolled over on her side and scratched his belly, laughing at his tongue hanging out his mouth. “Oh yeaah you missed the scritches! You just love when I give you the belly scritches!” She cooed, continuing to laugh as she watched him.

She hadn’t seen much of the dog this whole time, with him always beside Damian and her actively avoiding him.

Titus got up and started licking at her again, wrapping his upper legs around her in a hug. She hugged the large dog back and laughed as he slobbered into her hair. She pulled back to look at the dog, watching as he abruptly stopped his kisses. “Wanna go for a walk?” She asked excitedly, laughing when he shop up from her lap and started jumping. He barked happily as she got up, watching as he bolted down the hallway.

She buttoned up her jacket, holding onto the bag of toys in her arm. She opened the door and watched as he ran out into the backyard, nearly running through the flowers.

She ran out after him, laughing as he ran even faster. They played tag for some minutes, nearly falling on her face a few times when he’d make a sharp turn.

She sat down in the grass, noting the small bits of snow on the ground.

She laughed as he pranced over to her, he had a large stick in his mouth that he showed proudly. He dropped it at her feet, looking up at her with big eyes. She picked it up and watched as he chased after it, watching as he cane back with it.

They played ratchet for a while, the large dog seeming to never grow tired with it. That was until she took out a plush toy, watching as he dropped the stick when she squeaked it.

They sat there in the grass as he Chewed up the toy, fluff flying everywhere. She scratched at his belly some more, watching as he nearly starts falling asleep. “Alright boy, let’s get inside.” She cooed, getting up with him and walking back.

Her phone shook in her pocket, startling her slightly. Grabbing for it and looking at the name, a smoky grew on her face. “Hey dad.” She said happily, hearing the slight chuckle at the other end. “Hey bubs,” he chuckled, causing her to slightly laugh. “What’s up? Need anything?” She asked. “No actually, i was just calling to ask how you’re doing.” A smile grew on her face at his question. “Everything’s going alright so far, what about you? Have you abd dick got any clue as to who broke into our apartment?” She asked, she heard his breath catch in his voice. “Uh, nothing yet honey. I’m sorry.” He said, she could hear the hesitation in his tone. She didn’t bother to point it out, knowing he’ll tell her eventually. “Now, why don’t you tell me how your weeks been, I’ve missed talking to you this past week.”

“And as if it couldn’t get worse that night, I nearly shot Roy in the asscrack when I thought he was one of the slippery bastards.” He laughed, causing her to chuckle back. “Well besides your uncle being a dumbass, what’s been going on with you? I know you told me about the party, but I know those idiots must’ve done something.” He asked. “It’s more shocking if they aren’t being idiots here. But besides that, I wouldn’t know.” She says. “Hm?” He asks, causing her to sigh. “I’m not really involved with them when they go out. And, okay there’s no way to transition this. But dad, I think I’m ready to go out.” She admits, hearing him let out a sigh. “I don’t know-“ “i know dad, it’s still scary but you gotta realize, my face has been on every cover of the news lately. They obviously know it’s me. They can obviously put two and two together and realize who everyone is now. And nothings happened. I’m ready dad.”

He sighs, pinching between his eyebrows. “Alright, but I need you to do one thing for me.” He says, his voice calm but stern. “What is it?” She asks. “Let me give you places to go. I don’t want you going out and messing with the big guys. While I don’t doubt how amazing you are, you haven’t done this long. And I know you’re not gonna go out with them. So please, stick to the smaller jobs for now. I’m not gonna be there with you like it’s always been.” He says, his heart panging inside his chest in fear. She sighs, “alright. Where should I go?” “I’ve been watching this group for a while, they’re a bunch of punks who rob small stores. They’ve never robbed any banks or anything bigger than a rite aid. But I was able to tap into one of their lines, and they’re looking to rob the bank that’s a block away from the old library.” “You mean citizens bank?” She asks. “Yes, tonight at 12 they’re looking to break in through the back. Be there by 11:30. No later than 11:40. I’ll hook your coms up to their line so you can listen in on them.” “Anything I gotta be worried about?” “Nothing, they’re 5 guys who call themselves, hear this, the red hoods. Real original.” He chuckles. “Alright, and don’t worry dad, I’ll be safe.” She chuckles. “You better. And remember, I’m always hooked up to your line so if anything happens, tell me and I’ll be there in a heartbeat.” “I know, and thanks dad. I love you.” “I love you to bub.”

The cave was quiet, apart from the waterfall streaming in the background. Everyone suited up quietly as they prepared to leave for the night. That is, apart from someone.

She would usually be down with them, usually by the computers or the training mats. It wasn’t completely out of the ordinary not to have her there. So nobody paid any mind to it.

Damian and Bruce walked over to the tumbler, Tim and dick in tow.

All their heads whipped around when they hear the start of a motorbike. Their hearts accelerating and minds perplexed on who it could be. Then they realized.

She had been hate for close to 2 months, they knew she’d eventually go out. But didn’t Jason say she shouldn’t? She was very well at listening to him, while she was strong willed, she always trusted her father's words. “Let’s not fuss about it. Let’s go.” Bruce says, climbing in with everyone behind him.

The grind was wet under her boots, having rained no more than an hour prior. The street was surprisingly quiet, usually every street was filled with people and cars even at this late of an hour.

She looked down at the watch on her arm, 11:20 it red. She parked her bike in a secluded spot, putting trash cans in front of it.

She walked to the back of the bank, the premis still vacant.

She pulled up jasons contacts on her arm, having had her coms upgraded recently. “Red, I’m here.” She reports. “Good, in the back there’s a locked door with a dial pad. Can you find it?” She looked around the door, spotting the dials almost immediately. “Found it.” “Okay good, the numbers are 11 23 64 88 108 and 47.” She dialed each of the numbers accordingly, watching as the light turned green before the sound of the lock opened. “I’m in.” “Alright, I’m hooking your coms up with theirs as we speak. Call again if anything happens.”

She sat on one of the hanging signs against the wall, making sure not to fall off. She had a clear view of the large room, able to watch and hear when anyone came through.

She looked down to her belt, all equipment ready. She tucked a stray hair behind her ear, snapping a hairpin over it.

Her coms light up and she hears in, the sound muffled by static slightly. “Alright, we go in, grab as much as we can, and run out. No going back for more. We pack as much as we can one round. And keep your guns trained, who knows if we’ll run into one of those freaks.” A man said, his voice was gruff, sounding like a heavy smoker. She heard 4 others agree with him, and the call ended.

She watched as each men walked in slowly, stifling a laugh as she watched them. They looked like your usual robbers, that is apart from the red ski mask and red hoods.

5 of them, the first man who must be the leader, was tall and broad. 3 men behind him, each the same height and relatively sane build. 2 men behind them, the men in the back were small, smaller than the rest. They both shook slightly with their guns in hand. They kept farting around the room, never bothering to look up.

She started climbing down, grabbing onto the sides of the walls to quietly get down.

She stayed behind the wall, eyes trained on the men. She’d wait for them to separate, knowing they’ll be easier without the group.

She watched as the second group went into one room, the others disappearing.

She held her breath as she got to one valt, watching as one tried opening the lock. One man was behind him, watching around the room. The other man was outside the room, eyes trained around the large room around him. Again, never bothering to look in a blind spot where she hid.

She spotted a box of tissues on a table beside her, slowly grabbing for it when he looked the other way.

She threw the box across from her, watching as his head whipped to the noise. He took his gun out and walked towards the noise, right beside her.

She waited until he walked by her, and watched as he bent down to the box.

She got behind him, holding onto him as he struggled. She immediately covered his mouth with chloroform, not even letting him yell out before she applied it. She watched as he slowly dropped to the ground, letting him go as he fell to the ground in a heap.

She dragged his body over to the same blind spot, making sure to secure the cloth around his mouth and nose.

She watched as the first man got inside the vault, waiting for him to get inside.

She pulled up her remote hacking and shut the vault, watching as the first man panicked as the door shut on him.

She ran up to the second man, jabbing her left hand into his lower right rib cage, making sure to hit his liver. He groaned out and clutched his stomach. She swung her leg and striked the side of his jaw, watching as he fell to his knees. She finished it with a large stomp to the top of his spine, hearing a large crack and his screaming, him falling to the ground paralyzed.

She hacked into the vault again, running in and spotting the man. She dodged his poorly aimed shots, running up to him, cocking his gun out of his hand. She jumped up on his thigh, swinging her body around him, crossing her legs around his upper body. She abruptly grabbed a hold of his head, rotating it harshly with her legs and cocking into the back of his neck. She watched as he fell to a heap on the floor, seeing his labored breathing and shaking.

She found the other 2 smaller men, watching as they both stuffed money into their bags hurley. She ran up to the one behind the other, covering his mouth with more chloroform, the other man turning around and yelling out when he spotted her. She ran over to him, punching up into his nose, hearing the crack. He fell back onto the ground, grabbing for his face. She hit him several more times, before hitting into the middle of his throat.

She heard nothing as she left the room, heart spreading up due to the silence.

A shot takes in front of her, nearly missing it. She turned her head to the last man, watching as he ran up to her.

She kicked into the side of his face, jumping up his thighs and swinging her legs around his throat. She pulled him down onto the ground, letting out a yell when he grabbed onto her foot, slamming her into the ground. He got on top of her, closing his fists around her throat.

His hands let go as a gasp left him, looking down and seeing the knife in his gut. She drove the knife in further, throwing him off of her as he choked out blood.

She yanked the knife from him, watching as he struggled to cover the wound.

She waited until she heard nobody else, and started walking out the back, making sure to set off the alarm on her way out.

“I’m back, took a little longer than usual.” “Thank god, I was starting to worry for a bit.” He admitted, hand over his chest. “Yeah sorry about that, last guy was a little messy but I got it done. The police should be there any minute now.” She said, climbing back onto her bike. “Well just get back, you did good tonight bubs.” She let out a chuckle, “thanks dad, I’ll call you tomorrow, I love you.” “Love you too bubs.”

“That, was completely unclad for.” Bruce scolded, walking up to her when she got back. “What was? I didn’t do anything wrong?” She retorted, voice filled with anger. “What was wrong? You paralyzed 3, and killed one!” Damian yelled, walking over to her. She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “Yeah and? We have different methods. But it’s totally okay if you give them permanent brain damage. Last I checked, you don’t run this place like you think you do. So both of you shut the fuck up and let me do my thing.” She yelled, walking away from them.

“You insignificant hard headed-“ “id watch what you say Damian. you have no leg to stand on. You’re nothing but an arrogant thick skulled asshole who thinks he runs the world all because he’s got daddy’s money. You think you can talk to people however you want but get angry when we say something back. Well while everyone is to much of a fucking wimp to say anything to tou, I’m not. I don’t care what you say to me. But I’m done with you thinking your shit doesn’t stink and that you can walk all over me and say whatever you want. It’s time you grow the fuck up for once. You act like a spoiled child. Say whatever insult you want to me, I know you’re just mad because you're still attracted to me.” She spat, watching as his face went from anger to disgust. “I don’t want-“ “oh that’s bullshit Damian and you know it. I see the way you still look at me. That night when you ‘accidentally’ went into my room and passed out, I watched as you stared at me. You think I don’t notice but I do. But you’re to much of a fucking hardheaded prick to admit it.” She said, turning around and walked away.

The walls shake as he slams the door shut, the picture on his wall nearly falling off. His heart is pounding in his chest as he paces around the room, pulling at his hair as his breathing hardens. Anger courses through him the longer he thinks about it. ‘I don’t find her attractive anymore? How could I?’ But as quick as he thinks this, memories flash of her. Her skin glistening with water droplets, her hands trying to cover herself but he could still see her-‘stop it’ he tries telling himself. But the harder he tries the more came to him, it’s like he’s purposely trying to touture himself without his control. He can still feel the supple skin of her thigh in his hands as he kissed her. The feel of her body shaking slightly under him as he grinds his hardening-‘STOP’ he screams into his head.

He puts his hand against the wall, his other hand clutched in his hair tightly. His body feels the same warmth as before, only now his heart tremors inside of him the harder he fights.

He clenches his eyes shut as he tries to rid his mind of her. Flashes of training, fighting, anything he can think of to stop the loop of her. But as hard as he tries, the desire to think more about her grows.

The fire deep inside him grows the longer he fights it, it’s as if each time he pushes it down, the stronger it grows.

He lets out a shaky breath as he tries even harder to rid his mind. His hand clutching his hair until a small gasp leaves him.

The feel of her hands pulling at his hair as his lips were on hers play in his mind. The feeling of himself being pulled into her as he moaned in her mouth when she pulled it even harder between her slender fingers. The feeling of her nails scratching his scalp sends shivers down his body.

He slams his hand against the wall, pushing himself off of it and walking to the bathroom.

(Warning: smut)

The screeching of the water falling down the shower drowns out the sound of his breathing. His body shaking slightly as he undressed himself. A faint moan leaving him when he pulls his pants down his body. His length bobbing up to his body almost immediately. He could feel the low grade heartbeat inside of it, his body screaming to relieve the pressure.

A shuddering gasp leave his body when the freezing water makes contact with his warm skin, his body arching away from the freezing temperature. His heart beating rapidly as he tries to steady his breathing. A shudder leaving him as he tries stepping under the stream again.

The fire inside of him won’t die out even now, only growing strong again.

The freezing theme didn’t even work to get rid of his erection, only growing painful due to the blood flow.

He steps out of the stream to the opposite wall, feeling like he’ll puke due to the cold temperature. His body warming up again when the water was no longer on him.

He shakes as he fights off the thoughts of her again. Anger bubbling up inside him. Why can’t he stop? Why is he being so weak, giving into his mind and body was foran to him. Rarely he would let his mind wonder if he chose not to. But even with fighting it, the stronger the desire to keep going intensifies.

His left hand fists against the wall as his right hand clutches together at his side. The want inside of him screaming to just do it.

He hadn’t done it in years, not since he was 16. Even then, it wasn’t even enjoyable. He had no idea why he wanted to do it, no desire for anything but to relieve himself. No images or feeling playing in his mind when he did it, only the feeling was driving him to let go. Nothing close to how he’s feeling now.

His battle breaking the harder he tries not to think of her, his right hand shaking. A shudder leaving him when a water droplet rolls down his neck. The memory of her warm lips wrapped around his neck as her tongue kicks the skin.

A moan leaves him when his hand finally closes around his painfully hard cock, a shudder leaving him as he grips it in his hand. He breath shaking as he thrusts into his hand slowly. “F-fuck.” He moans out, his breath growing as he thrusts harder. The fire inside him growing as he goes faster, his teeth clenching as he starts moving his hand to meet his fastening thrusts.

Moans slip past his lips as he shuts his eyes, the feeling indescribably different from the last time he did this.

Images of her underneath him as he grinds into her-no. Not her. He still tries fighting the urge to think of her as his thrusts grow rapidly, his heart beating faster as his stomach starts clenching. His length growing more pressure as he squeezes even harder around it. “Oh, fuck.” He groans out. The images of her body shaking under him as he slips his tongue inside her mouth won’t stop, even when he tries blinking his mind of anything, just focusing on the feel of his cock slamming into his hand.

His legs nearly giving out as they shake trying to hold himself up. Momentarily stopping as he sits against the wall and resuming. The cold water infighting him further when it hits his legs. His body shaking as he fights off the impending orgasm that’s growing inside him. His moans growing in volume as he spreads up. Anger bubbles inside him the harder he tries fighting the thoughts of her, only getting more difficult the longer he goes.

His thrusts growing sloppy as his orgasm grows closer, a layer of sweat bearing down his face. He can’t keep holding it off as he feels his body tightening up.

He breaks his resolve as images of her moaning out under him as he thrusts inside her core, a loud groan leaving him when the pressure breaks. Groans leave him as the dam breaks as tremors overtake his body as waves of euphoria take over his body.

His heart pounds rapidly in his chest as he breathes heavily, shaking as shocks overtake him. Throwing his head against the wall, a shaking breath leaving him. “Fuck.”

#damian wayne x reader #damian wayne fanfiction #damian wayne imagine #older damian wayne #Batman #batfam x reader #batfamily #damian wayne #red hood #damian wayne smut #Jason todd #dick grayson #Tim drake #dc #dc imagine #dceu

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eleven-times-lively · 4 years

Text

The Twins - Part 1

In which Fred and reader welcome their new bundles of joy into the world.💕 Masterpost

Summary: The first children of Fred and reader are born as the couple beings their adventures in parenting and the first real trial of marriage. With a bit of angst IM SORRY. Word Count: 6845 oops Note: So I kinda forgot I had to do this lol. I wrote this at 1am on Friday cause I had two history essays due that I procrastinated hehehe.

You found him in the kitchen and wrapped your arms around him from behind. “What’s this for, love?” He giggled as he turned to face you. You cupped his face in your hands and looked him right in the eyes, “I’m pregnant.”

The tears quickly began to well in his eyes, his emotions processing before his thoughts. “You’re, pr-”

“Yes, Freddie! Pregnant! We’re going to be parents!” He picked you up into the air like you were no more than a feather. Embracing you in the tightest hug he ever had he nuzzled into your neck.

“How do you know!? How long have you known? How far along are you?! Did you tell anyone else before me? This is amazing! Are you okay?” The amount of questions--both spoken and underlying--that he was throwing at you was unreal.

“I’ve been vomiting, I’m two weeks late, and yes it is amazing!!!” You pulled him into a deep kiss as you celebrated together.

“We need to tell everyone!”

“Woahhh… slow your roll, Weasley. I think I should head to the doctor first. And besides, you aren’t supposed to tell anyone for a few months in case something… happens.” His face contorted a bit at the last part. He had just found out about the little bean inside of you and he already couldn’t bear the thought of something bad happening. “Here, sit down. Can I get you anything?”

You let out a light chuckle. “Fred I’m not diseased. I can’t be more than a month pregnant, it’s almost as if I’m not at all.”

“I knowww,” he groaned, “but you have our baby in there, and I need to protect you at all costs.”

You blushed at his words. “A cup of tea wouldn’t hurt I suppose.”

***

Three days later you and Fred were seated in the doctor's office, practically vibrating with nerves and excitement.

“Mr. and Mrs. Weasley! Nice to meet you! I’m Dr. Bloom. Congratulations on the news!” Dr. Bloom was the peppiest woman you’d ever met. She couldn’t have been more than five foot two and her dusty brown curls bobbed about the room along with her. “Now, when did you find out?”

You sat up a bit straighter, matching her warm smile. “About three weeks ago I missed my period, and I’ve been dizzy and nauseous ever since… Although I just put the pieces together a few days ago,” you added with a chuckle.

“Great! So you could be about a month along already! How exciting!” She grinned at you and Fred, seemingly more excited for the baby than you two were. “Now normally we would wait until about seven weeks to do an ultrasound, but because we aren’t entirely sure how far along you are we may as well do one today. Mrs. Weasley if you’d please hop up here and just life your shirt a bit.”

You stood and did as she asked, and Fred gripped your hand once you were settled.

“Now this may be a bit chilly!” she remarked as she began. Her gleeful face quickly contorted into a cross between confusion and concern. You could practically hear Fred’s heart sink as you both feared the worst. “Mrs. Weasley, how far along did you saw you were?”

“Well I missed my period about three weeks ago, but we did skip protection at the beginning of… last… month…” you’re words trailed off as you realised.

“How fun! Mr. and Mrs. Weasley I’d estimate that you are about six weeks along! Good thing I did an ultrasound, it’s the perfect time!” You and Fred grinned at each other with all of the passion in the universe.

“Could we um… is it too soon to see the baby?” He asked sheepishly.

“Of course not, Mr. Weasley!” She grinned up at Fred… very far up. “Here’s the little bean!” She turned the monitor and your heart melted.

“They’re beautiful,” Fred sighed, the tears welling up in his eyes. “Y/n, love, that’s our baby.” Now you were crying.

“Oh… wait.” Dr. Bloom piped up, except she didn’t sound even the least bit concerned. She turned the monitor back to herself as she searched the screen.

“Doctor?” Fred questioned, a hint of fear pricking at his words.

She turned back to you, practically jumping out of her seat. “Mr. and Mrs. Weasley you are having twins!!” She practically shrieked as she turned the monitor back to you and Fred. “See? There’s one and there’s the other! Now, it’s too early to tell the gender but you do have two separate amniotic sacs so they could both be the same or you could get a boy and a girl!!”

You and Fred looked at each other once more before wrapping in a tight embrace. “Twins!” You both exclaimed in unison.

“Twins!” Dr. Bloom chimed back. “Twins are quite rare at your age, Mrs. Weasley. Do they run in either family?”

“I have a twin brother,” Fred replied, sounding quite proud of himself. “I can’t wait to tell Georgie!” he whispered to you.

“How fun! Aren’t genetics so interesting!?” She once again grinned up at both of you, both now standing. “Now I should mention that this immediately makes the pregnancy high risk.” Even while delivering somewhat concerning news, she still sounded chipper. “You’ll have to have more ultrasounds, you’ll get a lot bigger, and there is a chance you’ll have to go on bedrest for the last few weeks or you’ll have to deliver early. However, it is a good thing that you two are so young because that reduces all of these risks by a lot!” There were smiles around the room as she handed you the printed picture of the sonogram. “Oh! I almost forgot! Your due date is around early January, of course expect mid to late December since twins are usually born around 36 weeks rather than 38 to 40.” You and Fred thanked her as you headed out of the office.

*** Two months later...early July...14 weeks pregnant.

“Ugh! I look like a whale!” You cried out as you tried to tug your dress on. “Whyyy twins!? I’m barely four months but I look huge already!”

“Nonsense!” Fred piped up from behind you, peering in from the doorway.

“Honestly I can’t believe I didn’t know until six bloody weeks! I was already showing then I just thought I got fat!”

“Nonsense!” He repeated. “You are bloody stunning, love.” He walked over to you and placed a kiss to your shoulder before crouching down and placing both hands on your belly. “No matter what you look like, you’ll always be gorgeous in my eyes.” He placed a kiss to your belly before standing up again and placing a kiss on your lips.

“Yeah you say that now, but wait until after I have these beans and I’m all saggy,” you chuckled, a tear pricking at your eyes at your true thoughts behind the joke.

“Still beautiful,” Fred kissed you again, laughing. Then he noticed the tear rolling down your face. “Love, what is it! For real, tell me.”

“I’m massive! And these stretch marks! I mean seriously, why do these have to be a thing?! You’re gonna see me after I have our babies and question why we even got pregnant in the first place.

“Y/n! Stoppit, please. These stretch marks are a sign of power and strength. What you’re doing is a bloody amazing thing, especially since you’re doing twice the work. You are the strongest, most fearless woman I know, and no matter what you look like, that won’t change. I can’t stand to see you talk about yourself like that,” he spoke softly, running his hands through your hair as he went. “I’m not walking away until you say that you love yourself no matter how you look. And you have to mean it.” He smiled down at you as he moved behind you to look at you in the mirror.

“I know you love me, Freddie. Thank you. These changes are just...hard,” you sighed a bit as you spoke. “But I love myself, and my body, and all of the amazing things I’m doing right now.” You smiled at him in the mirror. “Happy now?” There was humour in your tone but he could tell you meant what you had said.

“Very.” He kissed the top of your head before he spoke. “Now, we have a busy day. I told mum to gather everyone at the Burrow to share the news, although of course I didn’t tell her that bit. So we are heading there, then we have to take the photos to send out the announcements to everyone else, and then we have our visit with Dr. Bloom later.”

“I’m exhausted thinking about doing all of that,” you added with a laugh. “Can you believe it’s already our third visit? And we get to find out the genders today!” You added with a smile before trailing off, “Of course, only if you want to.”

“I’d love to find out what you’ve got in there, love,” he laughed at his remark, “But only if you do. And I suppose it doesn’t matter all that much in the end, does it?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well it’s all up to them anyway. Boy, girl, somewhere in between, maybe it’ll change. I don’t know, I just want them to be happy and be who they are.” You almost burst into tears at his words.

“I love you, Fred. And our babies.”

“Love you, too.” He gave you a kiss as you both headed out of the bedroom door to apparate to the Burrow.

***

You and Fred tried your best to hide the bump as you came up the path to the front door, but of course everyone noticed as soon as you stepped inside and you were met with a barrage of excited comments.

“Fred Weasley I haven’t seen you in mo-, Y/n you’re pregnant!!” Molly shouted.

“Oi! Look at you, y/n!” Ron and Harry said in unison, “Congratulations!” Ginny and Hermione followed.

“Well would you look at that,” Bill uttered in surprise, “my baby brother’s going to have a baby of his own!” You and Fred exchanged knowing glances, wondering if you should tell them the extra surprise just yet.

“And you didn’t even tell me, your own twin brother!” George scoffed, sounding fake annoyed. “Congratulations, mate!” he said as he patted Fred on the shoulder, “and y/n you’re looking radiant as ever.” You just rolled your eyes and laughed.

“Actually…” Fred began, “we have an extra surprise.” This was met with puzzled looks all around. “Georgie, I guess twins run in the family cause we’re having our own!” This only welcomed another wave of excited shouts from the group.

“Twins!” Fred and Geroge exclaimed in unison, sharing the most excited faces you’d seen in a while.

“How wonderful!” Molly exclaimed, lightly touching your belly, “how far along, y/n? Do you know the genders yet?”

“Fourteen weeks, and we find out today!”

“Fourteen weeks!” George gawked, “Happy birthday to you Freddie…” Fred just rolled his eyes at his brother.

“Fourteen weeks and you’re already huge!” Ron piped up, earning a slap from Molly and Fred. “Heavens no I didn’t mean it like that! I just would’ve thought you were a bit farther along. My apologies, y/n. You look amazing.”

“It’s fine, Ron, I know,” you said, genuinely meaning it, “you get a bit bigger with two babies.” you laughed.

You all sat and talked for a few hours. Discussing everything from how you found out, when you told Fred, and how you felt about it. You noticed it was nearly time for your appointment, so you and Fred rose before saying goodbye to the group and apparating away.

***

“Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, good to see you again!” Dr. Bloom said, chipper as ever. You and Fred looked down at her, smiling. “Y/n, you know what to do, dear. Will you two be finding out the genders today?”

You and Fred looked at each other expectantly before pronouncing a resounding “Yes!” in unison.

“Fantastic,” Dr. Bloom laughed as she got started. “Alright Mrs. Weasley, the babies look amazing, perfectly healthy and the size we’d expect for fourteen weeks.” She smiled at you and Fred as she spoke. “Are we ready to have a look?” You and Fred nodded and grinned. “Alrighty, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, you are having girls!”

“They’re both girls?!” Fred exclaimed, both stunned and overjoyed.

“Yes! Congratulations!”

You and Fred embraced, both crying.

*** Three months later… end of September… 26 weeks pregnant

“Twelve weeks to go, love,” Fred said as he rubbed your belly, “can you believe it?”

“I certainly cannot. But I can believe that I wanna have these babies and be done with pregnancy,” you groaned. “I’m so excited to meet our beautiful baby girls, Freddie.”

“Me too, y/n. I’d never imagine you’d be so eager to give birth. I mean you look radiant and don’t all women just love being pregnant?” Fred muttered as the two of you were cuddled on the couch.

“Are you serious?” You asked, looking down at him.

“What?”

“I mean look at me!,” you exclaimed as you stood, looking at his seated figure on the couch. “I’m absolutely massive and I still have three months to go! I waddle when I walk, I can barely go upstairs without having to take a break at the top, my ankles and back hurt constantly because I’ve already gained thirty pounds and I can barely keep anything but toast down!” you continued, practically yelling, “I mean, how in the world could I be happy right now!”

“Cause you’re carrying our children…” Fred said softly, standing up and resting his hands on your belly. “Our daughters are in there, y/n.”

“I know that, Fred,” you sighed, “and I can’t wait to meet them. I’d just rather be done with this pregnancy. It’s been horrible! Does everyone feel like this?”

“I mean I know you’re extra hormonal but I think you’re overreacting just a bit, love.” wrong answer, Weasley.

“Excuse me?!” You shouted, taking a step back from Fred. “You try gaining this much weight, carrying TWO children,and being in constant pain!” You were yelling now.

“Y/n, I’m so sorry, I- I don’t know where that came from…”

“Yeah? Well you said it so there has to be some truth behind it, Fred. This is my pregnancy, not yours. I’m allowed to feel however I want right now and you can’t say a damn thing about it! At least make an effort to understand what I’m feeling.” You walked away and out into the gardens before he could respond.

Fred came outside to find you about thirty minutes later, wanting to give you some time to cool down. He found you lounged on the chair in the garden, a tear rolling down your cheek. “Y/n? Love, I-”

“I’m sorry, Fred.”

“What? Why? You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for,” he nearly whispered as he crouched down next to you and wiped the tear from your cheek.

“I exploded on you for no reason. I hate yelling, especially when it’s at you, especially when I have our daughters in me. I feel bad.”

“Love you absolutely had a reason to be upset, I made a horrible comment cause I wasn’t thinking. I’m so, so sorry, y/n. What you are going through is a massive change, and you’re right, I can’t even begin to comprehend what it’s like. It’s your body, your emotions, your experience and I stepped on that. I’m sorry.”

“I know. I love you so much, Freddie. And you’ve been absolutely amazing throughout these past six months. I couldn’t have asked for a better husband.”

“I love you, y/n, very much and I hope you know that.”

You slowly and painstakingly rose to your feet before taking his hand and heading inside.

*** Three months later… Christmas Eve… 39 weeks pregnant

“Fred!” you shouted from your bedroom at your husband. He was busy getting the gifts together so the two of you could head to the Burrow for the Christmas festivities. You were huge, tired, and pretty miserable given that you were now a week past your due date of December 17.

“What?!” Fred called out when he reached the bedroom having sprinted upstairs. He’d been on edge ever since your due date and every time you yell his name he thinks this is it, I’m going to meet my daughters. “Is everything okay? Is it time!?”

“No, Freddie,” you said slightly chuckling with an apologetic look on your face. “I just wanted to show you my Christmas Eve outfit.” You looked extremely festive in your red sweater, leggings (you had chosen jeans just ditched them for comfort), and little booties, which all came together with the little Santa hat atop your head.

“You look amazing, love. Ready to go?”

“Absolutely!” Fred went downstairs and came back up with the gifts and from the bedroom floor he grabbed your bags to stay a few nights at the Burrow. You didn’t even have the energy to apparate yourself, let alone go downstairs to do it.

Moments later you and Fred stood in the chilly air outside the Burrow. He quickly ushered you inside while struggling to balance the three bags he was holding.

“Freddie! Y/n!” Molly called out. “Here y/n, please sit,” she offered out the stop on the couch she was just in. You sat down rather fast for your condition, grateful to be off your feet. Molly took the bag of gifts from Fred as he went upstairs to put your bags in his old bedroom, which you’d reluctantly have to share with George and Angelina. “So how are you, darling? The kids are all outside gathering more wood for a fire, and probably getting into trouble,” she chuckled, “Can I get you anything?”

“Oh no, I’m perfectly fine thank you Molly.” She seemed satisfied as she hurried away to call everyone else in from the snowy backyard. The once quiet living room where just you and Arthur, who was asleep, sat quickly filled with Weasleys and their companions.

“Y/n! So great to see you, love,” Ginny smiled warmly at you.

“No babies yet?” Harry asked.

“Unfortunately not,” you chuckled. You answered other questions from the many Weasleys as you greeted them all. Fred then came running down the stairs when he heard everyone.

“Georgie!” he shouted, leaping into his brother’s arms.

“Well hello, Freddie!” he laughed as he hugged his brother. Everyone found various seats around the living room as they asked you more and Fred more questions.

“When is your due date, y/n?” Hermione asked.

“Well it was December 17, but as you can see we’ve since exceeded that.”

“Do you know the genders? If so, why haven’t you told me, er- us?” George questioned.

“We do know, and all in due time, brother.” Fred laughed.

“Are you nervous? Scared?” Charlie asked as Bill shot him a look.

“Extremely,” you and Fred said in unison, exchanging glances. “I’m just so scared I’ll do something wrong, you know?” Fred continued, “Like what if I’m not a good father and I mess them up somehow?” he asked, voice shaky.

“Freddie,” you said softly as Molly spoke up.

“Fred, honey, you’ll do great! Your father and I have surely raised you right and you’re a bloody amazing person, dear. You’ll be one of the best fathers out there!” This was met with affirming nods and ‘mhmm’ from around the room. Seemingly calmed down, Fred took a deep breath as Fleur spoke up.

“Do you have any names in mind?”

“A couple,” you responded, “we definitely want them to have some sentimental or family value to them.”

“Little George Weasley Junior!” George exclaimed. “Or Georgina,” he quickly added.

“They aren’t your kids, you git,” Fred laughed. “Perhaps their middle names could be Molly and Ginevra.” Fred quickly realised his slip, earning a death glare from you as he turned pale as a ghost. He quickly corrected himself, “Or maybe even William, or Percy, or Charles, or… uh… um George, or Ronald, or even Arthur.” He was rambling and it was obvious he was only trying to cover up.

“Y/n Weasley do you have two baby girls in there?” Molly asked, grinning.

“Yes I do! But they aren’t identical,” you said proudly. “We were hoping to announce it tomorrow but someone can’t keep his mouth shut,” you laughed. You and Fred were met with more congratulations and excited sentiments, and Ginny looked like she was about to explode.

“Two baby girls!” she exclaimed, “Harry, we may have to have our own soon!” Harry just froze in his spot and paled.

After many hours of conversation between everyone, it was getting late.

“Alright, kids,” Molly spoke up, “bedtime.”

“But Mummm,” George whined, “ we aren’t children anymore.”

“Then why are you whining like one George Weasley?” Everyone snickered as George turned red. Everyone retreated upstairs to their childhood bedrooms.

“You know, Georgie, sharing a room was great when we were kids but now we’re adults with wives and it’s rather unfortunate.” Fred said to his brother.

“I think it’s quite fun,” George responded, “like one last sleepover before you and y/n are boring adults with kids.”

“Hey now Georgie,” you chimed in, “you seemed awfully excited about these babies a moment ago.”

“Well of course I am, y/n! I can’t wait to meet my little nieces, but I will miss my brother.”

“Oh you wish I’d leave you alone, Georgie,” Fred laughed.

After getting organized and settled you all climbed into your respective beds. At least they weren’t too close to each other. It was quite difficult to squeeze into the twin sized bed with yourself, Fred, and the baby bump. You eventually made it work and found yourselves cuddled closer than ever, though neither of you seemed to mind.

***

You and Fred woke up Christmas morning to an empty room and the smell of breakfast creeping up the stairs.

“Morning, love,” Fred whispered sleepily. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, love,” you said as you kissed him. He helped you out of bed before the two of you got ready for the day. You and Fred went downstairs and were met with warm smiles from the Weasleys.

“Morning you two!” Molly smiled at you from the kitchen, “Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas, Molly, and everyone else of course!”

After breakfast everyone found a place in the livingroom and around the tree, elated to receive their Weasley jumpers. As she was passing them around Molly whispered only to you, “I made you one a bit bigger. It’s not for pregnancy cause I figured you’d have the babies by now, but I figured it’ll be nice right after you have them.”

You felt a tear prick at your eye, “thank you, Molly.”

“Of course, dear,” she said, then continued at a normal volume, “I was going to knit some for the babies but we don’t know their names yet! As soon as they’re born I’ll get to work!”

Gifts were passed out between couples, in-laws, and siblings as laughs and smiles were traded around the room. You were about to give Fred his gift when you felt that dreaded pain in your lower back and abdomen. You stopped mid-movement to clutch your stomach, clearly in pain.

“Y/n?” he asked. Between your noises in pain and his questioning, you had the attention of everyone in the room and quickly felt yourself turn red. “Is this what I think it is?”

“Yeah, I think it was,” you responded once the contraction subsided.

“Merlin!” Hermione gasped, and Fred only turned stark white and didn’t know what to do.

“Is it time?” Ginny asked, sounding more than a bit concerned. Her voice matched the face of everyone else in the room.

“No, I don’t think so. That’s the first contraction I’ve ever had. It’s either my body giving me a little ‘preparation’ one or this is early labour.” Fred winced at ‘labour’.

“Could it be false contractions?” Molly asked, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“I don’t think so. Dr. Bloom said that at this far along any contractions are probably real. She also said that I wouldn’t be able to talk through them, which I couldn’t, and that they’d last at least forty-five seconds. Was anyone timing that, by chance?” you chuckled, expecting the answer to be no.

“Actually, yes,” Hermione spoke up, “fifty-two seconds precisely.”

“Do… do we need to go to the hospital?” Fred asked, finally out of his daze and finally able to speak.

“No, dear,” you and Molly both said. You took a deep breath before continuing, “Dr. Bloom said early labour is confirmed when you have at least two an hour that are forty-five to sixty-five seconds long. And to notify her and get to the hospital when they are five minutes apart and at least two minutes long, or whenever my water breaks.” Fred winced again at that. “There’s still a chance that could’ve just been a… warning contraction,” you said looking around the room, “Even if this is labour, can we please go about the day normally? I’d like to enjoy Christmas.”

“Of course, love,” Molly said, “but you’re going to the hospital as soon as it’s time, Christmas or not.”

About forty minutes later, you had another contraction. You were in the kitchen talking to Bill as he was washing up dishes from breakfast.

“So have you and Fred gotten the nursery set up? I’d sure hope so considering you’re in labour,” he chuckled.

“Well I may not be in la-” you groaned in pain as the second contraction hit.

“Y/n? Is it-” You could only nod your head in response.

“Well I guess I’m in labour,” you chuckled.

“Forty-nine seconds,” he told you, and you were grateful he had counted. You thanked him and walked off to find Fred after assuring him you were completely fine.

Bill finished up and everyone was in the living room. You came back downstairs to share the news. “Looks like I’m officially in labour, everyone!” You were met with cheers, everyone knew it would be soon considering you were overdue.

As the day went on you kept having contractions, and it was like the world would stop spinning whenever one would hit you. Whoever you were in the room with would stop whatever they were doing, count the time for you, and not resume their actions until triple-checking that you were okay. You had also been keeping track of the minutes between contractions, holding steady at about thirty-five. You and Fred went to bed early that night as you were so exhausted from the contractions. You could barely sleep as the contractions kept coming. You’d hoped that they would just hurry up and get you into active labour, but they stayed at no less than thirty-three minutes apart.

Another contraction woke you up the next morning after what couldn’t have been more than an hour of sleep. You just stared at the ceiling, uncomfortable until the contraction passed. Fifty-six seconds. You assumed it was rather early as Fred, George, and Angelina were still asleep. You wandered downstairs, expecting mostly everyone to be awake, thinking it was a normal hour knowing the twins always sleep in. Instead you were welcomed by early morning darkness, save for Percy and his small table lamp.

“It’s barely even six, what’re you doing up?”

“Barely slept, didn’t realize how early it was.” He shrugged and put his book down for you. The third-born Weasley was quite a unique being. Priding himself on his neatness, intelligence, and punctuality, he was already dressed in his daily suit. Come to think of it, you weren’t sure you’d ever seen him in anything other than a suit.

“Still only a half hour apart?” he asked as he headed to the kitchen.

“Unfortunately,” you sighed, “twenty hours now, Percy.” He sighed in content as he handed you a mug of tea, which you then thanked him for.

“What do they feel like? Is it terribly painful?”

“Eh, I wouldn’t say painful. It’s more like pressure and squeezing. I’m sure they’ll hurt more in active labour.” And as you finished your sentence a contraction hit you.

“Merlin,” Percy said when it was over, “that was sixty-one seconds, y/n.”

“That’s the longest one yet,” you said, looking slightly concerned, “and I had one when I woke up, which couldn’t have been more than twenty-five minutes ago.”

“Well I guess things are finally speeding up, eh?” You smiled at him as you sipped your tea. You had always taken a liking to Percy. Sure he was nearly two years older than you, but you had always had the most in common. You can recall all of the late night conversations you’d shared in the Hogwarts library when you and Fred had just started dating.

***

It was around four that afternoon and your labour was finally starting to move along. You were just so happy to be almost done with pregnancy that it was like a little celebration everytime you had a contraction, although they were getting more painful. You were out in the garden with Fleur when another one hit.

“Exactly! So these rose-” you froze in pain, the worst it had been yet. You could see Fleur counting silently, her lips moving and eyes darting around in concentration. When it was over you let out a tired yet excited sigh. “How long?” you asked eagerly.

“Seventy seconds, mademoiselle!” you had confided in Fleur about your struggles and she was now just as relieved as you were. “How long since the last?”

“Fifteen minutes!” You practically cheered. You had been in labour for thirty hours now, and not even active labour yet, and you were over it.

The day went on and the contractions got closer and closer together, but of course more and more painful. By eight that night they were nine minutes apart and Molly made you sit on the couch, not allowing you to get up. “I know it’s not time to go yet, but you need your rest, y/n,” she said, “you have a lot of work ahead of you. Let me get you some tea, love.” She gave you a sympathetic smile before walking away.

Not ten seconds later you groaned loudly in pain as another contraction hit you. Luckily Ron had been in the living room and was crouching at your side in an instant. You whimpered as the pain took over, just wanting it to end. The contraction finally subsided as Ron was running his hand up and down your leg. “Eighty-two seconds now, y/n. Almost there!” He gave his lopsided smile before standing up. “That one seemed bad, are you okay?”

“That one was pretty bad, but I’m fine. Thank you , Ron.” He smiled again before returning to his seat. Molly had been in the doorway and was smiling proudly at her son. She handed you your mug of tea.

“Let me go fetch Fred, love. He’s been outside with Georgie shoveling snow but I’m sure you’d rather have him with you.” She walked off before you could thank her or respond.

Moments later Fred joined you on the couch. Laying back and settling you between his legs so he could place his hands on your belly. His warmth enveloped you and would surely be comforting with the next contraction. “Hi, love,” he whispered, “how are you?”

“Miserable, Freddie,” you answered honestly.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered as he kissed your head. A few minutes later another contraction hit and you tensed against Fred. He gently rubbed your belly and whispered in your ear, helping you through it.

“Eighty-five seconds,” Ron piped up. “Getting closer!”

You smiled at him, silently thanking him. “I think I just want to go to bed now.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, dear,” Molly said, “you’re getting very close and if your water breaks while you're asleep you may not notice.”

“I probably won’t be doing much sleep, but I know I shouldn’t go up.”

“Just relax, darling,” Fred whispered, “I’m right here, you’ll be okay.”

It was now ten thirty, and your contractions were now just under seven minutes apart and very very painful. A particularly bad one hit you as you let out a small scream, you were breathing heavy when it was over. The entire group was in the living room, practically watching your every move.

“Just shy of two minutes, y/n.” Ginny said.

“Thank you,” you said. “You can all go to bed,” you addressed the group, “it’s late.”

“Nonsense!” George said, “We aren’t sleeping until you have those babies.” Everyone nodded and agreed with him.

“I think it’s time to head to the hospital, love,” Fred said.”

“No, Fred,” you replied, a little more sternly than you had intended. “They aren’t five minutes apart yet and they aren’t two minutes long.”

“Love, you’re in a lot of pain and the contractions are barely seven minutes apart any more. That last one was three seconds shy of two minutes.”

“I said no, Fred. I will when they get to six minutes, okay?” He just sighed and placed another kiss on your head.

An hour went by and you were seemingly stuck at seven minutes apart. The pain wasn’t any worse or any better, it was as if you were stuck in labour limbo. You’d been in labour for thirty eight hours now. Various Weasleys had drifted in and out of sleep, but everyone remained relatively alert and they all were at attention when a contraction hit. And after a few more minutes, one did. You let out a louder cry as this one was particularly bad.

“Merlin, that was only six minutes since the last one!” Charlie said, realising what this meant. “Two minutes and two seconds.”

“Love, can we please go now?” Fred asked. “You promised we would when they were six minutes apart.”

“Just a few more contractions, Freddie. They may not stay that close, it could go back up.” Fred only groaned.

“Y/n,” Molly began, “you know I love you but that’s not usually how that works. Speaking from experience, you know I have done this a few times, I think you should go.”

“I don’t want to…” you muttered quietly, but mostly everyone still heard due to the night time silence.

“What’s that, love?” Fred asked.

“I don’t want to go.”

“Well I know you don’t just yet, we can wait a little bit if you’d really like.”

“No, Fred, I don’t want to go at all.”

“Pardon? I don’t think mum would like it very much if you had our babies on her couch.”

“I scared Fred,” you whimpered, holding back tears which inevitably came down. Everyone in the room was looking at you with either concern, sympathy, or both. “I can’t do this… I can’t do this…” you were fully crying now.

“Love, what do you mean? Of course you can do this. You’ve been carrying our babies for nearly ten months now. You’re the strongest woman I know, you can do anything.”

“I know, I’m just scared that something bad is going to happen.” Molly crouched down next to you when she heard that.

“Y/n, I was bloody terrified the first time. We were so young just like you and Fred were. I had all of the same feelings, and believe it or not they all came back again with the twins even though I’d done it three times before. I’ll be honest, having a baby isn’t easy, especially when you do it twice in one day, but I know how strong you are and I know you can do this.” She took your hand in hers and smiled at you. “So would you like to go to the hospital now, love?”

Everyone in the room looked at you expectantly awaiting your answer. You could hear the collective sigh of relief when you nodded your head. The house was quickly alive in an instant. Molly helped you to your feet, everyone put on their winter jackets, Fred called Dr. Blom, and George grabbed the hospital bags. In an instant you had all apparated away to the hospital where you were quickly ushered into a room. The nurse had gotten you situated and into the bed as the Weasley family removed their coats and hats as they found places to sit or stand around the room. Your contractions were four minutes apart now and your water had broken. Fred and George stood on either side of you, squeezing your hands and helping you through each contraction however you needed. Dr. Bloom burst into the room a few minutes later, looking rather peppy for it being midnight, as she began to ask you all the standard questions. You had started to answer, but Fred took over when another contraction hit. Dr. Bloom estimated you had about twenty more minutes to go. Your contractions were now two minutes apart and lasted nearly three minutes. You were showered with words of encouragement from all around the room and George and Fred kept your hair out of your face and rubbed your shoulders. Just as Dr. Bloom has estimated, twenty minutes later she declared that you were ready. “Alrighty! Everyone except the father out!”, a nurse declared as the room burst into a flurry of activity.

“You heard her, love,” Fred began, “out you go.”

You wanted to laugh at his joke but another contraction came over you. “Alright Mrs. Weasley,” Dr. Bloom said, “you can start pushing now!”

About ten minutes of horrible pain later, Dr. Bloom announced, “here’s the first baby, born 12:34 am on December 27, 2002!”

You and Fred both began to cry as the screaming baby was placed on your chest. Sure she

was red and wrinkly, but she was yours. “Ready for round two, Mrs. Weasley?” After a longer amount of time Dr. Bloom spoke up again, “And here’s baby number two! Born 12:50 am on December 27, 2002!” The second baby was placed on your chest and you and Fred were still crying. After a short time, two nurses came to clean the babies up as Dr. Bloom finished what she was doing. Not ten minutes later the babies were handed back to you in their little caps and hospital blankets.

“They’re beautiful, love. Fantastic job.”

“Thank you, Freddie. But I suppose you had a part in this as well.” You both chuckled as

Fred gently ran his finger over the cheek of the baby closest to him. The girls weren’t identical, but they may as well have been. Every single feature was the same, all except the hair. Both girls were born with a full head of hair, and the only difference between the two was that one had the trademark Weasley red hair and the other had your hair color. The rest of their features were practically a direct copy of Fred. “Would you like to hold your daughters?”

Fred nearly fainted at those words, his daughters, he gently cradled each baby in his arms, whispering to each of them. “Hi, loves. I’m your dad. And that’s your mum over there, she’s the bravest woman you’ll ever meet. I can’t wait to bring you two home.” You practically melted at his words. After a while longer the rest of the Weasleys were brought in and welcomed by you and Fred, who each had one baby. They all remarked over how both girls looked just like Fred, and how the hair was the only difference.

After a moment you spoke up once everyone surrounded the bed and you had their attention. “Everyone,” you began, slightly holding up the red-haired baby in your arms, “this is Cassiopeia Ginevra Weasley.”

“And this,” Fred began with the other little girl in his arms, “is Calliope Molly Weasley.” There wasn’t a dry eye in the room as everyone admired the newest Weasleys.

“You did have the names picked out!” Bill exclaimed. Molly and Ginny were crying the most, looking overjoyed at the babies named after them.

“I love the names, y/n,” Percy said, “you could call them Callie and Cassie for short.” There was a collective ‘awww’ around the room as everyone had realised what you and Fred had done.

After another hour or so of everyone admiring the babies, you started to drift off to sleep. Everyone agreed it was time to be heading home to give you so much-needed rest. You quickly fell asleep, happy to not have to worry about contractions anymore, as Fred set the girls in their little carts before sitting in the chair beside your bed.

“I love you, y/n,” he whispered, “and our new family.”

#HP #fred weasley #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley fluff #fred weasley one shot #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley series #series #marriage story #bill weasley #george weasley #george weasley x y/n #george weasley fluff

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imnotwolverine · 4 years

Text

The marriage pact - Birthday present

Henry Cavill x OC Alice - multi-chapter

< Part 24 | Part 25 Birthday present | Part 26 >

Disclaimer: Just cute fluff

Author’s note: I couldn’t make myself finish this story on a Monday, of all days, so I did write an epilogue that will be posted tomorrow. ❤️

Word count: 1.632

(Link to my Masterlist)

Dear readers,

Time flies when you’re having fun, and I’m bursting with joy right now. Quite literally actually, my belly so large that baking a birthday cake for my partner in crime was almost impossible. Almost. I managed. It is today the 5th of May and as he is out to the gym for his morning workout, I am working out to slap this house into a state of celebration. Cake, balloons, garlands, everything. The golden 40 should not go uncelebrated! Now, as time is running short since everything is taking a million times longer than I had initially anticipated, I will be off again now.

Your ever loving, MOM-TO-BE,

Ali

Breathe in, puff - puff - puffff out. Folded over on a kitchen chair, my hands wrapping nervously around my belly I tried to calm my breathing, the ghost of a contraction taking longer than it probably should. Was this it? Was this..

The front door opened and I heard an all familiar tipple tap of dog paws on the tile floor of the hallway, followed by squeaking sneakers as the front door was closed again. ‘Honey, I’m home!’ Henry called out, making me groan in silent frustration as the pain was just too bad to get up - or speak for that matter.

It took a minute or so before Henry finally found me, still on my chair in the kitchen, brows furrowed and face focused as I tried to steady my breathing. I wanted to cheer him a happy birthday, but all I could manage was a broken whine. Henry widened his eyes and quickly squatted down before me, his hands also folding over my belly in concern.

‘Hey..shh..it’s okay. Are..are you okay? Do I have to..? I can..’ The big bear of a man started to babble a string of words I could barely follow - that is what happens after months of poor sleep, nausea and aches everywhere. Blinking at him I nodded at a small puddle on the kitchen floor beneath the sink. ‘I think..pffff pfff pfff …I think my water broke.’ I swallowed. ‘Not sure though..I mean..I was..pfff..doing the dishes..and..’ I gave him an exasperated look - he had told me to just take it easy, sleep in a little if I could manage.

But of course I had been stubborn, simply refusing to let his birthday go uncelebrated.

Henry started to laugh, shaking his head. ‘Ali..’ He looked into my eyes. ‘..you..’ His smile reached both ears. ‘Me.’ I nodded, pouting. Slowly his eyes lowered down to my belly again, a careful thumb brushing over the cotton of my t-shirt. He was quiet for a moment, just brushing his thumb over my belly, my breath back to a calm, steady rhythm now. I could see those big wondering blues study every fibre of my shirt, of the way the babe in my belly responded ever so slightly to his touch.

It was a feisty baby bear, for sure.

And then his eyes started to sparkle. With tears, his lip shivering ever so slightly as he quickly looked back up at me. ‘Oh don’t cry please.’ I muttered, cupping his cheek. ‘Then you make me cry.’ I sniffled, already feeling the tears starting to roll down my cheek. We both sniffled back some tears, just sitting there in the kitchen, Kal hogging down some food after his large morning walk in the corner. The dishwasher buzzing.

This was it. This was it! Pack your bags everyone, we’re going on an adventure!

—

Exactly a minute to midnight it happened. FINALLY. I wasn’t even sure what to do with myself anymore. Nothing was comfortable, everything was frustrating and painful and I was so exhausted that I couldn’t even scold the heaven’s up above anymore, all sounds coming from my throat being animalistic growls. But it was all so very worth it, I swear. Because there’s only a few moments in life that truly etch themselves in the fibre of your being for eternity.

One of them being Henry bawling his eyes out as he held his newborn baby boy in his arms for the first time. The large papa bear looking all kinds of disheveled and exhausted, I couldn’t help but think it was his best look yet. His smile so wide it nearly tore his face in half, his watery eyes sparkling with true joy, his large hand tracing the features of a very small, but already very bubbly boy.

Sam.

Because everyone needs a Sam. Sams are the best friends, the most loyal of all, and this little Sam sure would make for a great protagonist, already tugging at his fathers hand with strong little fingers.

Henry laughed, another tear dripping down his face, his index finger being clutched by mighty baby paws.

‘He’s already as strong as you.’ I smiled, looking at the two from the sweaty mess of my hospital bed. Not that I cared. Not that anything mattered. This was perfect. Henry looked up and smiled at me. ‘No, he is as strong as his mother.’ He corrected.

I raised an eyebrow. ‘Meaning..?’ Henry chuckled and leaned in, carefully laying the babe back on my chest, my whole body firing up with happy little sparks. ‘He’s already MUCH stronger than I could ever be.’ Henry pressed a careful kiss on my forehead as I looked down at the small human laying there. My little human. Perfect, just per-fect, in every way.

—

‘I wonder what he’s dreaming of.’ I said quietly, leaning into Henry’s chest, the tv playing some movie but neither one of us truly paying attention. We both just couldn’t stop gawking at the little human that was safely snuggled away on my chest, sleeping. Henry pressed a kiss on my temple and hummed. ‘You, most probably.’ He sniffled and I poked him gently in his rib. ‘Hennn..’ I shookmy head in disagreement. ‘What? I don’t blame him.’ He chuckled. ‘Ugh..you’re such a sap.’ I rolled my eyes.

‘Please allow me.’ He murmured, pressing another kiss, this time on my cheek. ‘Very well then.’ I laughed, turning my head to kiss him on the lips. It was a sweet, tender kiss. Almost a bit too careful on his side. But that was Henry, the new dad. Everything was done with utmost care and tenderness. Too soon he broke away from the kiss again, his eyes locking deep with mine. ‘There’s one more thing..’

I raised my eyebrows, seeing him slip off the couch, his hands reaching for my free left hand as he settled on one knee, a tiny velvet box being conjured from his sweater pocket.

Oh. OH!

I watched him wide-eyed as the following words slipped with a smile of his tongue; ‘Would you please, please allow me to marry you now, Ali? Dearest, dearest..’ - I started to laugh aloud, making Henry frown slightly, his words dying on his tongue and little Sam muttering some quiet protest as I jumbled him with my laughter.

I quickly calmed down and took a settling deep breath, before managing: ‘Oh..sorry. I mean..uh..gosh..I got you a present actually. Could you..could you fetch it? It’s in my bedside table.’ Henry frowned even more, then looked at the door to the hallway. ‘Please..’ I begged him, biting my lip with mirth.

‘Now?’

‘Now, Henry.’

Giving me another suspicious look, Henry quickly moved to fetch the present from my bedside table, his face having turned to equal mirth when he returned downstairs.

Another velvet box in his hand. My ring to him.

We both started chuckling.

‘Sorry..it didn’t go quite as planned.’ I giggled, making him shake his head in disbelief, his feet carrying him back to his initial spot before me on the couch. And once again he settled down on one knee, reaching for my left hand, which I gladly offered.

‘Ali. For real though this time.’ He raised a teasing eyebrow. I giggled. ‘Third time’s a charm.’ - ‘Would you please, finally, marry me?’

Smiling giddily I nodded, muttering a barely discernible yes from my laughing lips. ‘Yes..yes.. yes!’

Henry smiled, then carefully placed the ring on my finger - not entirely easy as I was still sporting quite sausagy fingers from my pregnancy. Both giggling, he finally managed to squeeze it onto my finger, after which I picked up my box, reaching out for his left hand and taking it in my left hand as my right hand was still occupied with a sweetly sleeping baby.

‘Dear Henry. Did you know that after we drafted that darn Marriage Pact, I made a copy? Just to make sure I wouldn’t accidentally lose you if we lost that pact?’ I clicked open the box and a folded sheet of paper was in there. Henry blinked and unfolded it. And indeed, it was a perfect greyed-out, slightly faded copy of the pact.

Our pact.

Beneath it a ring. He huffed with amusement and I continued: ’I didn’t want to lose you then. But I most DEFINITELY don’t want to lose you now.’ I reached out to cup his cheek, his beard hair growing out after a few days of not shaving, his eyes looking back into mine. ‘Dearest, sweetest, bestest of friends. My Henry. Would YOU marry me, please?’

Henry’s eyes glittered as he looked up at me, his lips quivering ever so slightly as he started to nod. ‘Ye-yes. Yes please. Yes finally. Oh gods.’ He quickly sat back onto the couch and pulled me in a not-so-careful hug, his lips pressing a number of kisses on my face.

‘YES for the love of God!’ He exclaimed, then finalized our promise by pressing one proper, solid kiss on my lips.

And thus, the Pact was consumed, gratified. He was mine..and I was his.

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all1e23 · 5 years

Text

Serendipity [One-shot]

Pairings: Alpha!Steve x Reader

Summary: Things between you and Steve have always been a little frosty, but you’re starting to warm up.

Warnings: Nada. It’s just cute fluff. Well, I guess A/B/O Dynamics, but tbh it’s fairly light throughout.

A/N: This is for @thefanficfaerie Disney Quote Challenge! My prompt was the song “Something There” from Beauty and the Beast. They live at the compound. Yes, Bucky is there because I like everyone together and happy, okay??? Send me love because I’m needy.

***My fics are not to be saved or posted on any other sites without my written permission. Reblogs are my jam, though! Thanks!*

Steve Rogers hated you.

There were no ifs, ands, or buts about it.

It was the only explanation for the way he acted around you. He despised you; no rhyme or reason you could think of. You had no idea what you did to make him dislike you so much, but whatever the reasoning behind his feelings, Steve wasn’t letting it go. The two of you barely shared a word upon your arrival to the compound, but from the first moment, Steve laid eyes on you; his feelings toward you were quite clear.

Most days, Steve could barely look at you, and if it were possible for him to do so, he would leave the second you entered the room. No matter what was happening, he would excuse himself and dart out of the room as if it were on fire. Missions together were a rarity, but when they did happen, Steve would stay unusually close to you, notwithstanding the amount of contempt his heart held for you. Whenever this practice was brought to his attention, Steve simply said he had to ensure you stay safe; you’re part of his team and an Omega after all.

Because an Omega couldn’t possibly be able to protect themselves without a strong Alpha to watch over them? He was Lucky Natasha didn’t hear him say that.

So much for Captain America being all for orientation equality.

It was more than the way he looked at you, though, or didn’t look at you. You heard the whispers within the team. You weren’t the only one who noticed Steve’s behavior towards you. Tony, Bucky, and Natasha were glued to the two of you like they were watching some overly dramatized reality show.

But, hearing it from his lips hurt more than you expected.

You wandered through the halls, intent on stopping to grab a snack in the kitchen, and maybe see if Clint was up for a movie night. You were coming to the end of your heat, and after three days of being cooped up, you were finally able to leave your room without the fear of disrupting the rest of the Alphas on the team. You were about to round the corner when you stumbled upon Steve and Tony having what looked to be a tense chat.

Not that it was unusual for them, the topic, however, piqued your interest.

“I’m telling you I can’t be around her right now,” your feet froze, keeping you firmly planted to the ground as you peered around the corner to find Steve standing before Tony, arms crossed over Steve's chest and that lovely scowl on his face; the one you were sure he saved just for you.

“You’ve been around an Omega in heat before, Capscicle. I don’t see the problem.”

“I’m not talking about other Omegas! I can’t be around her,” Steve growled, sending a shiver through you. The bitter edge in his growl was enough to cause you to slink back and hide behind the wall.

Clearly, Steve didn't want to see you, and you weren't about to go out there now. Not while he was making sure Tony and anyone else within earshot knew just how he felt about you and, well, you got the message loud and clear.

Tony’s sharp whistle hit your ears, and you risked a quick glance back at the two Alphas; Tony grinned at the taller Alpha and shook his head, “You’ve got to get over her being here.”

“I can’t,” Steve snapped. “I can barely stand to be in the same room as her.”

Oh, because you're so great to be around all the time, you thought. You couldn’t keep listening to how much Steve couldn’t stand the thought of being near you. It was too much. Movie night forgotten, you tiptoed back to your room and locked the door behind you.

If he didn’t want to be around you, he wouldn't have to. You were teammates, not friends, and he made that quite clear tonight.

“Cap, I know things were different in the ’40s, but nowadays, when you find your mate, you don’t avoid them. Maybe flirt a little. Tell her she smells yummy. She’s got that sweet flowery scent, right?”

Steve’s eyes flashed red as a warning. “Yes, she’s... roses and vanilla.”

Tony grinned and continued on, “Throw her a few rumbles. I doubt she will turn you away. You should see the way she looks at you.”

“Because I look like this?”

Steve waved his hands down, gesturing at his large and very muscular frame before quickly dropping his gaze from Tony’s. Tony finally understood why Steve was going to such great lengths to avoid the Omega. Steve liked you. He wanted you more than Tony grasped from first glance, and Steve was worried you would only see him as Captain America -- as that Alpha, not as Steve.

“I’m not gonna lie. You’re a delicious slice of beefcake. Don’t tell anyone else I said that, but no, that’s not why. Y/n is your mate. Not Captain America’s mate. Steve Roger’s mate,” Tony patted his shoulder and made his way towards the elevator.

“Don’t be an idiot. Just spend some time with her without all the pressure. You’ll be fine.”

---------------------

“Who the hell buys a stove like this?” You grumbled quietly as your eyes roamed over the twenty or so buttons on the newfangled stove Tony had put in the kitchen. All you wanted to do was make a sandwich and slink off back to your room before tall, blond, and grumpy got a hold of you and drained every ounce of joy from your day. You twisted a knob that resembled something close to what would turn on a conventional burner, but it didn’t help. The large appliance just beeped loudly, and all the lights slowly faded to black.

“What the hell?” You groaned and let your head fall against the cupboard in front of you.

You were never going to eat at this rate. It would be takeout for the rest of your life! A deep chuckle filled the air behind you, and you spun around to find Steve standing there, smirking at you and looking utterly adorable.

Why couldn’t you hate him back? It would make things so much easier if you could hate him as much as he hated you.

“Need help?” Steve asked you, shaky and unsure as if he was worried you would yell at him merely for asking. That was so unlike the way Steve usually acted around you.

“Um, I guess? I don’t really get this stupid stove. The knobs say nothing. How are you supposed to know which is which or what is low heat, and what is high heat? Why couldn’t Tony just buy a normal stove? One that isn’t so difficult to turn on.”

“You’re asking me why Tony does the things he does?”

You chuckled and gave a light shrug in response.

Steve walked up behind you and rested his arms on the counter surrounding the stove, leaning in to rumble softly in your ear, “You could have asked FRIDAY to turn it on for you. Do you want me to show you how to work it, or I can make it for you if you would like?”

You closed your eyes and started to sink back against his chest. That heady scent of amber and cedarwood set your skin on fire and left your head spinning. You didn’t want him to make you anything, or maybe you did. You’re not so sure what you want from him anymore. It was confusing with him standing so close and talking to you in that voice.

“Um, you can m--make it,” you whispered, earning a pleased hum from the Alpha behind you, and you quickly realized you were standing far too close, but, oh, you wished you could hear him make that noise again. You peeked back over your shoulder, no longer leaning into his warmth. Steve’s eyes had gone dark but were unreadable. He was probably thinking how incredibly incompetent you were if you couldn’t even work a stove.

No doubt, this will be added to his list of reasons to hate you.

‘If you don’t mind,” you added quickly.

“I don’t mind at all, Y/n. Go sit down, and I’ll make it,” Steve assured you and ushered you towards the stools behind the two of you. He truly didn’t mind. Steve wanted to take care of you in any way you would let him. The Alpha in him had been screaming at him to do so for months. If the only way to take care of you was making your lunch, then he was more than happy to do so.

Steve’s eyes raked over all the ingredients you had laid out on the counter and turned back to you with his brow raised, glowing smile on his face and asked, “Grilled cheese? Really?”

Was he... teasing you? Interesting.

“Grown-ups can eat grilled cheese, Steve. Don’t give me that look. I’m even using Tony’s fancy cheese. It basically becomes a four-star meal if you add expensive cheese.”

Steve snorted and turned back around towards the stove. You tried to watch what he was doing so you wouldn’t have to ask for help next time, but your mind was too busy trying to catch your racing thoughts. What could you have possibly done in the last few days to make things less frigid between you?

Maybe Natasha had been right this whole time; Steve never really hated you.

“When is the last time you ate something healthy?”

You wanted to roll your eyes at the Alpha’s question, but you couldn’t help the smile that split your face in two, “Not sure. Sometimes I can convince Clint to get a supreme pizza, and I get Beef and Broccoli when we all order Chinese.”

Steve turned back to look at you, lips pressed into a thin line looking thoroughly unimpressed despite the humor dancing in his eyes.

“Not exactly what I meant, Y/n.”

“They are never going to figure this out,” Bucky griped from his spot on the couch, glancing down at the red-head who had her legs thrown over his lap and was purring sweetly every time Bucky ran his fingers over the exposed skin below her shorts.

“I tried to talk sense into him, but he’s not listening,” Tony added as he watched the two of you dance around each other in the kitchen. “Not that anyone is surprised by that.”

“Tasha,” Bucky kissed the back of her hand softly, “Omega, I think you and I need to nudge them a bit, ya?” Natasha smirked and returned a kiss to her Alpha’s cheek.

“Sweet that you want to help. I don’t think our meddling will do anything to help, but we could try, I suppose.”

She climbed off the couch and sauntered towards the kitchen, gracefully sliding onto the stool next to you. She stayed quiet as she watched you subtly court each other, neither discerning what the other was doing. Steve set your plate down, and there were several pieces of sliced apple occupying the space next to your deliciously buttery grilled cheese. Your nose crinkled at the sight of the addition to your meal, making the Alpha chuckle.

“Things between the two of you seem less… frosty,” Nat whispered, watching Steve wash the frying pan he used to make your lunch.

You shrugged as you pushed your food around your plate, the food that Steve made for you, “I guess. He’s not so bad. He might even be a little funny, and maybe he doesn’t hate me like I thought.”

“Who would have guessed? I’ve been telling you that for months,” Natasha was quick to remind you.

You glanced up, catching Steve’s eye for a fleeting moment and quickly dropped your eyes back to your plate, just in time to miss the amused smile tugging at his lips.

---------------------

Lunch with Steve had become a regular thing.

So did the fresh pink roses in your room. They appeared every few days, and you couldn’t help but grin when you saw them. Somehow Steve was always around when you wanted lunch. You would find your way to the kitchen where Steve would be waiting on you, and he would fix you both something to eat while you talked. Sometimes the conversation flowed, and other times it was awkward and stilted. You were just starting to get to know each other under these new terms, so some problematic conversation was expected. There were times you felt like Steve was holding something back, and couldn’t put your finger on what it was. Uncomfortable tension or not, he never stopped trying to get you to eat something that resembled healthy food.

Usually, it would bother you to have an Alpha waiting on you like that, but the pleased scent rolling off Steve made it not so bad.

It had been a week since you’ve had lunch with Steve, and there were no roses mysteriously placed in your room. A full seven days without seeing that dopey smile, he got on his face when you walked into the kitchen, and it was starting to weigh heavily on you. You snapped at Natasha one too many times, and she had finally had enough. She told you to get dressed and meet her in the gym. You assumed she wanted to help you work out your aggression. But you wouldn’t put it past Natasha if she was planning on kicking your ass for snapping at her.

By the time you made it down to the gym, you were still unsure which to expect.

Probably the ass-kicking.

You took two steps into the gym and froze at the soft notes of amber that hit your nose. You looked around the nearly empty room and paused when your eyes landed on Steve, shirtless and pounding away at the heavy bags Tony designed to withstand a super soldier or two. You didn’t know he was back, but maybe Steve wanted it that way. You attempted to quietly tiptoe out of the gym without Steve noticing you, but you smacked into the wall behind dropping your metal water bottle to the floor with a resounding clang.

Steve slowly turned around, letting the bag still on its own and smiled at the sight of you. Not that Steve didn’t know it was you standing behind him before he laid eyes on you. He’s mesmerized your scent, and even through your blockers, he can still catch notes of rose and vanilla hanging in the air of every floor of the compound; he loved it and hated it.

“Sorry. I didn’t know you were in here or even back home. I was looking for Nat. She said to meet her here to train for a bit, but I’m guessing she’s not here since you’re in here. Not that you being here is the reason she’s not in here! I just meant I didn’t see her, and I am guessing you wouldn’t be working out with a shirt on if someone was in here with you.”

Steve glanced down and his bare chest chuckling as you continued to ramble, “Or maybe you would. I don’t know what you do. You can do whatever you want, whenever you want, and you can wear whatever you want to work out. Although, I guess not whatever you want. Probably should wear pants. Not that I’m thinking about you without your pants!”

You closed your eyes, hoping one or both of you would disappear so you wouldn’t have to face him after that embarrassing attempt at socializing. The only bright side to the moment, Tony wasn’t around to witness this disaster and use it tease you for the rest of your life.

“I could help you train. Since Nat seems to be missing in action, but only if you want.”

You opened your eyes, and sure enough, there he was. Steve was still standing there looking thoroughly cute and offering to help you after you made a total fool of yourself. You pulled your lips between your teeth, gnawing nervously as you watched him for a moment. There was no way you could train when he looked like that. His charming smile was enough to distract you but add in the chiseled abs? No way you would survive.

“Okay, but you have to put a shirt on,” You motioned to his bare chest. “I can’t focus around you, to begin with, and that’s all very distracting.”

Steve preened and grabbed the shirt he had tossed to the floor a few hours ago. He gave up on the shirt once he started punching; Bucky had irritated him more than he realized it seemed. A moment of worry flashed through his head. Maybe he was right all along. You didn’t see the man he was under all... this. Steve pulled the dark grey shirt over his head and brushed his hair out of his eyes, meeting yours, and he knew he was acting foolish.

God help him, Tony was right.

“Better?”

The dumb shirt that you insisted Steve put on was slightly wet and clinging to his well-defined chest. No, it was not better. In fact, adding more clothes was somehow worse? It made him look like sweet, caring Alpha you meet every day around lunchtime, and the soft look in his eyes had you forgetting all about what was under that incredibly thin shirt. How were you supposed to focus when he was looking at you like that?

“I guess,” you squeaked.

He grinned, “Ready, agent?”

“What are you guys looking at?” Sam peeked his head over their shoulders, staring at the bright blue live feed of the gym. “Since when are Steve and Y/n training together?”

“I can’t believe it’s finally happening,” Natasha mumbled. “I never thought they would come together on their own.”

“I guess we should have locked them in the gym months ago,” Tony snickered.

“What’s happening? Man, What are you three going on about?”

Bucky draped his arm over Natasha’s shoulder and pulled her towards their bedroom, leaving Sam confused and staring at the floating screen before him.

“Nothing, Sammy. I’ll tell you about it when you’re older.”

“When I’m older?” Sam shouted after the dark-haired Alpha. “Buck, I swear-- get back here so I can beat your ass old man!”

Steve, had you secured to the floor under him and smirked at how easily you were distracted by a few sweet words, “Thought you’ve been training with Natasha for a few months now? That’s all you got?”

You growled, and the scent of a pleased Alpha filled the gym, making your heart flutter. You quickly shook it off and batted your lashes, drawing your bottom lip between your teeth. Steve’s brows shot up, and you slowly lifted your head towards his. He went completely still as the grip on your hands loosened, and his focus was lost somewhere in your pretty lips and intoxicating scent.

Within seconds you had your legs wrapped around his tiny waist and had him flipped and pinned under you before he had a chance to react. You grinned down the Alpha, hands pressed firmly against this chest.

“Don’t you train with Bucky? Is that all you got, Cap?” you taunted back.

Steve grinned.

You’ve never seen him grin at you like that. He slowly sat up, not even phased by the so-called hold you had on his chest. Steve wrapped his arms around your waist and secured you in his lap, leaving you nose to nose and breathless from the thick scent of cedarwood surrounding you.

“What would everyone say if they knew Captain American could be brought down by an Omega batting her lashes at you?”

Steve chuckled, but his eyes were earnest as he corrected you, “Not Captain American, Just Steve and not any Omega. Only you.”

Your fingers slipped into his hair, attempting to still their tremble and steady the frantic beats of your heart.

“Only me?” you whispered.

Steve hummed in response and tightened his hold on your waist.

“I think I like that. I prefer ‘just Steve’ anyway.” Steve’s smile faltered for a second and then spread into a wide grin. He’s been an idiot not to see what was right in front of him all this time.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was back I was trying to find the right way to tell -- Buck was a pain the entire mission. I needed a minute to cool down before I came to find you.”

“You wanted to find me?” You asked brows pinched at the thought.

“I’ve wanted to ask you something since we first met, but I wasn’t sure I should...” The confident Alpha seemed to fade away, and when he spoke, his voice stuttered with uncertainty, “Do you-- would you want to get lunch? With me, I mean. Outside of the compound. Away from all the other--”

“Alphas?”

Steve growled and pulled you closer to him, a gentle, teasing smile playing on his lips. You smirked and slowly wiggled yourself free of his arms, much to Steve’s dismay, and sauntered towards the door. Stopping to grab the water bottle you dropped by the entrance, you peered over your shoulder where you left Steve.

“I can be ready in twenty. Meet you outside?”

“Now?!”

“Better hop to, soldier,” you purred softly.

In all the time you’ve known Steve, you’ve never seen him move that fast before.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #alpha!steve x omega!reader #Alpha!Steve x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve x you #steve x reader #steve x y/n #Steve Rogers #Alpha!Steve #A/B/O verse #a/b/o dynamics #A/B/O au #disneyquotechallenge

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thesealishere · 5 years

Text

First Christmas Together! Yancy X Reader (Speed Date with Markipler winner)

[Y/N] hummed along to the Christmas music coming from the radio as they drove home from work. It had been a month since Yancy had gotten out on parole and had started living with them and they were happy to have someone to go home to every night.

Granted tonight what they came home to was a house filled with smoke and a blaring fire alarm, they ran into where the smoke was mostly coming from the kitchen, and found Yancy freaking out with a pan in hand, inside the pan was a blackened… Lump. He threw it into the sink and turned on the tap, the water instantly turning into steam as it hit the hot pan.

“What’s going on?!” [Y/N] yelled over the smoke alarm, grabbing a chair so they could get up and turn it off as Yancy opened a window.

“I uh… I wanted to make dinner for youse…” He laughed nervously before coughing. “It’s just… Youse been workin’ real hard and well, my jobs hunt ain’t going so well and I wanted to do somethin’.” He shrugged before dropping his head.

“Yancy.” They sighed, getting off the chair and walking over to him. “You don’t need to do anything like this, I know you’re trying. It’s not like it’s easy for an ex-con to get a job.” They said, placing a hand on his shoulder and he offered a weak smile.

“Still, I feel bad. Like I’m moochin’ off of youse. So, I figured I could at least make dinner, but I uh… Never really tried cooking before. Never got kitchen duty.” He let out another nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.

“It’s the thought that counts. Besides, I have a plan for us tonight that includes food.” They said and he looked at them in confusion.

“What’s the plan?”

“Well, it’s your first Christmas out of prison and with me and there’s this tree lighting going on downtown. The website said there’s gonna be caroler’s and hot chocolate and shops, I figured it would be fun!” They suggested, watching his face light up as they listed the different things.

“Well why didn’t ya start with that?! Lemme get my jacket!” He said excitedly, running out of the kitchen to grab his jacket out of the closet near the front door. [Y/N] shook their head, turning the water off in the sink and closing the window before turning on the fan above the stove, hopefully that would have the smoke cleared up by the time they got home.

The drive to the small downtown area was filled with Christmas songs being belted out by Yancy and [Y/N], the two only stopping when they passed by a couple of places that were nicely decorated for the season and even then they started right where they left off in the song.

They ended up having to park a fair distance away from the town square where the tree was, but as they walked they saw a small high school band setting up and they made a mental note to stop by once the tree was lit. There was supposed to be hot cocoa, carolers, and all the small shops were supposed to be open! But once they got to the town square there were no carolers, there were small children running around, playing with light up toys as the adults all huddled around and some man on a stage was talking about something they couldn’t hear due to the crowds talking. At least there was a place where they could get some hot chocolate and hotdogs, seeing as that was the only food they had.

“Sorry Yance, I don’t know why I was expecting something out of Hallmark.” They sighed, sipping their hot chocolate, at least that was good.

“Don’t youse worry about it. Anytime spent with you is a good time to me, besides we can go check out that band once we’re done here.” He said excitedly, taking a bite of his hotdog and stepping out of the way of a child that was running from their parents from some reason or another.

“Well, as long as you're having fun that’s what matters.” They said that the two eating their hotdogs and making whatever small talk they could until the man on stage started a countdown from ten. Once they reached one the tree lit up and everyone cheered, [Y/N] looked over to Yancy who was staring up at the tree as if it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen and they couldn’t stop the grin that spread across their face. The two stood there for a moment, letting the crowd thin out before walking a little bit closer to the tree to get a better look.

“This isn’t a tree! It’s just some big cone with stuff to make it look like a tree.” Yancy huffed once they got close enough to it.

“Well, that explains how they got one of these so big and perfectly shaped every year.” [Y/N] laughed at the pout on the ex-con’s face. “It also means they don’t have to worry about watering a giant tree, I wouldn’t want that job.” They continued on and he shrugged, taking the explanation.

“Well, it’s still really nice looking…” He said before turning away from the tree and smiling at them. “Let’s go check out that band we saw.”

The two quickly made their way back to where the band was and were happy to find that they were playing Christmas music, two of the kids getting up and singing “Baby, It’s Cold Outside”. Yancy took hold of [Y/N]’s hands and started to dance with them to the music, with a laugh they followed his lead and eventually a few other couples joined in dancing along with the music. During the songs that kids weren’t singing Yancy would sing to them and if it was a duet they couldn’t help but sing with him. They stayed there for the whole hour that the band played, clapping and whistling when it was time for them to go, the kids had school the next day after all. But before he left the band director made an announcement that they would be hosting a community dance that would be 40’s themed.

“Please tell me we’re going to that.” Yancy said as they walked away from the stage that the band was on.

“To what? The dance?” They asked before thinking about it. “Yeah, I could look into that.” They said and he smiled, starting to talk about all the fun they would have as they walked the streets, looking into the shops every now and again. They found their way into an antique shop, looking at old books and records, there was even a rack of old clothes where [Y/N] found an old leather jacket.

“Yancy! C’mere, you need to try this on!” They called and he instantly came over, moving a little faster at the sight of the jacket.

“Oh! It’s fits like a glove!” He said once he had the jacket on, pulling on it a bit and putting his hands in the pockets as they checked the price tag.

“This is only thirteen bucks? I’m getting it for you.” They said, not seeing Yancy’s face drop.

“Youse don’t have ta do that. Youse do enough for me as is…” He tried to defend but they weren’t having any of it.

“Yancy, it’s like this jacket was made for you. I’m getting it and I won’t take any ifs ands or buts got it?” They asked, he opened his mouth to protest more but one more look from them was enough to silence him.

“Right… Thanks [Y/N].” He said with a soft smile.

“No problem, just think of it as an early Christmas gift.” They said as he switched back to his other jacket and they walked over to the register where the older woman behind the counter eyed Yancy with some distaste.

“We’ll be getting this.” [Y/N] said as Yancy avoided the woman’s gaze, she said nothing as she checked them out and the two left with their purchase in a paper bag.

“Was it me or was that lady givin’ me the stink eye?” He asked once they were outside again.

“Oh, she was totally giving you the stink eye. But who cares what some random old lady thinks?” They asked and he shrugged.

“It was just… Odd is all. Not that I care what she thinks, I only care about one persons opinion and that’s youse.” He said and the two smiled at each other before they went back to looking around, every now and again [Y/N] could feel his hand brush against theirs and finally they just took his hand into theirs, watching a blush reach his ears.

“You know, the website said there was going to be carolers and I don’t think they meant the band…” They said, looking across the street as people walked around.

“Maybe… We are the carolers.” Yancy suggested.

“Wha-?” Before [Y/N] could finish their question Yancy began singing “Joy to the World” at full volume, drawing a lot of attention. At first [Y/N] covered their face and laughed, feeling their face heating up as they continued down the street. Once he finished the song a few people clapped as they bumped his shoulder with theirs.

“Very funny.” They grumbled before spotting a cafe and they quickly pulled him into it before he could start another song. Inside the shop was fairly quiet as the few people inside chatted and in the background played soft jazz, the cafe was steampunk themed and they seemed to have all kinds of different drinks and pastries. The two got drinks and some cookies before finding a table near the window to sit down and watch people walk by.

“Thanks for this.” Yancy finally spoke after the two sat in silence for some time. “Thanks for everything, I know I’ve said it already but I really mean it, thank youse.”

“You deserve the world Yancy and I may not be able to give it to you, but I can give you this and if that’s enough then I’m glad.” [Y/N] said, the two smiling at eachother, placing their hands on the table near each other.

“This is more than enough.” He said, moving his hand to rest on top of theirs. “I… I never thought I could be this happy outta prison.” He laughed, looking down at their hands, refusing to look up at them. He knew they were smiling at him, he could feel his heartbeat rapidly increase as he swallowed the saliva that had accumulated in his mouth. “I love youse.” He finally forced out, closing his eyes as he did so.

“I love you too.” There was no hesitation, they moved their hand so that their palm was facing up and they could hold onto his hand, his eyes shot open and to their face. He stared for a moment, looking for anything, any sign that he’d misheard them or that they were only saying that out of pity…

“Really?” His voice just above a whisper, he couldn’t believe it even as they nodded and he started laughing. He stood quickly, nearly knocking over the table along with their drinks and pulled [Y/N] from their seat and pulling them to him for a short, but passionate kiss.

“They said they love me!” He cheered, earning a few cheers and claps from the other people in the cafe who didn’t seem to mind the display. In the corner of the cafe, [Y/N] saw a woman that looked oddly familiar, she was smiling at them behind her cup but before they could get a better look at the woman their attention was drawn back to Yancy who was still laughing before he pulled away from them.

“What do ya say we go home, Yancy?” They asked, deciding to forget about the woman for now, right now, all that mattered was this.

“Yeah, let’s go home.” He agreed, feeling as if he was on cloud nine. Man, it was good to be free.

__________________________

I hope y’all enjoyed it! I based this very heavily on the downtown where I live! Also sorry it took a bit longer than planned, I ended up Christmas shopping yesterday and then I worked eight hours today! This was a ton of fun! I’ll make a separate post thanking everyone for participating in a bit! As always I accept any and all feedback! Thank you for reading! I hope it was worth the wait! ~Seal~

#speed date series #yancy x reader #iplieregosxreader

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let-me-love-you-loki · 5 years

Text

Waking Up in Vegas--Ch. 25

Chapter 25: The Way You Look at Me

Dean, 10:15 PM, Evening

“How about, after all of this is over tonight, we go back to the hotel, take a hot shower together, and eat junk food?” I said soothingly, sliding my fingers along the soft skin on the inside of her wrist. Her pulse beat wildly, a strange sort of music that made my blood sing.

Mera glanced up at me with those amber eyes of hers, the ones that could drag me down into an unfathomable abyss. One that I never wanted to leave. It was the glance that drew me in the first moment we met, they shade and hue that kept me in thrall in a way that I could never understand. She reached up and tugged on the end of her ponytail.

“That sounds really nice,” she replied, leaning her head against my shoulder. Her fingers settled into place with mine, holding my hand tightly. “If you promise that we can leave first thing in the morning. I don’t want to stay here any longer than I have to.”

I had known, ever since we drove into Davenport the night before, that she was nearly destroyed with anxiety by being anywhere nearby. She was terrified by the thought of running in to Seth’s family or any of their old friends. I could feel it, her sheer and absolute horror—it blurred in my veins, changed the way the air cycled through my lungs. It was an ache in my bones, an ache that I knew had to be a thousand times worse within her.

“Then let’s drop off the rental car and just fly home. Nobody needs us until Friday anyway.”

She glanced up, tears glittering on her lashes like diamonds. That beast in my chest reared up, roaring in desperation to protect her, to stop the pain and hurt that had somehow gotten past me to her. I brushed my thumb beneath her eyes, wiping away the tears gathered there. My heart thudded angrily, sadly, desperately. All I wanted was to take her away from everything that hurt her. If I could, I would carry her away to a place for just the two of us… where we could be together in peace without her past chasing her like ghosts.

“Every time I think I’ve figured you out, you surprise me, Dean Ambrose,” she murmured, a half smile on her face.

It was enough to lift my soul. To bring it into a place of something like peace and joy.

Mera, 10:20 PM, Evening

Just looking at his cornflower eyes made me feel as if the world could find itself right again. He had this way about him, this sense that permeated everything around him until there was nothing left but peace. It was one of the many things I loved about him. No matter what happened, I could find the center of the world in the circle of his arms.

“What do you mean by that, Mera?” he said, his lips curling up in a smile that still made my heart want to burst.

I looked up at him, wondering if the day would come when the sight of him didn’t take my breath away. “You are the kindest, sweetest, most wonderful man I’ve ever met. And I’m so lucky to be your wife.”

Those blue eyes blurred as he blinked rapidly, trying to hide the fact that he was tearing up. “I’ve been lucky since the day I met you.”

Leaning up, I pressed a kiss against his lips. “I love you, Dean.”

Seth, 10:22 PM, Evening

I was just standing in the hallway. Not moving, not talking, hardly breathing. Mera and Dean were right here, sitting on those road crates talking and touching. All I could think about was how they sat close together, her head on his shoulder, a smile on her face that I hadn’t seen in years.

Something inside me… something deep in my chest… it pulled, tugged, ripped so painfully it sucked the air out of my lungs. I stumbled back into the wall, a physical ache running through my entire body.

A lifetime flashed in my mind. The seconds and moments and hours, days, months, years… decades. The first time I saw Mera Reynolds—golden hair in braids with a Ninja Turtles lunch box standing by the cubbies in the back of our kindergarten classroom. Middle school—ponytails and a boyband t-shirt, magazine cutouts in her locker beneath a picture of us in the snow. Somewhere around ninth grade, looking over from my trampoline-turned-ring and seeing her sitting on the steps of my mom’s house with the camera in her hand. Junior year—Mera coming down the stairs at her parents’ house in a dark blue dress that made her hair look like burnished bronze. Senior year, signing day, when she turned down everything at her dream school to take an AT track and travel with me.

That first night on the road, getting lost trying to find the next town. She had her feet up on the dash of my beat-up second-hand car, music crackling through the speakers as she sang along. The motel on the side of the highway, splitting a meal from McDonald’s since that’s all we could afford.

The way she used to fuss when I got hurt. How she’d sift through her textbooks to find what needed to be done. Calling her teachers if she couldn’t find it. The times we couldn’t avoid it and ended up at the emergency room.

Every moment of our lives together raced through my brain. One after the other, marching toward the inevitable, inescapable finish. Faces blurred together, all sharing one defining characteristic—they weren’t Mera Reynolds.

I felt my bones breaking in my chest. My stomach turned.

I barely made it to the bathroom before I puked.

Mera, 10:30 PM, Evening

“Good luck tonight,” I murmured as Dean enfolded me in a warm hug. The scent of him wrapped around me, reminding me that I was finally in my only real home. No city, no family, could make me feel as calm and as happy as being with Dean.

“Honestly,” Dean replied, burying his nose in my hair. “I’m ready to drop these titles. I’m ready to do my own thing.”

I slipped my arms around his middle. “Whatever happens, whatever you do, I’m here. I’m behind you for every second of it.”

Dean’s lips settled on my temple. “I’m counting on it, darlin’. Because I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

With a final squeeze, I looked up at him and smiled widely. “Go on. Do what you do. I know it will be great.”

Dean, 10:38 PM, Evening

I stood in gorilla, my thoughts still in the back with Mera. As calm as she had been when we’d parted, I knew that she was ready to get this town in the rearview. It didn’t matter to me. But knowing that she was unhappy was enough to make gasoline burn in my veins. I’d go to the ends of the earth to make her happy.

Seth appeared next to me, his face looking grey. As much as I knew what he’d done, I couldn’t deny the fact that he had been one of my closest friends for a long time. “You good, man? You look a little green.”

I watched him swallow hard. There was a sheen of sweat on his forehead. The muscles of his jaw bunched tight. “Are you gonna vomit?”

He looked over at me, something off about the way his eyes focused. “Already did.”

“Shit, man. Are you okay to go through with this?”

“No choice,” he replied heavily. “I’m not backing out on my hometown.”

Seth sounded strange, something haunted in his tone. I reached over, put my hand on his shoulder. I felt him flinch.

Mera, 10:40 PM, Evening

I slipped around to the monitors so I could watch the match. Everyone who needed me had already been taken care of and long since left the arena. I had the time to myself as I waited for Dean’s match to be over. Watching it would make the time go by faster.

“Hello, Mera,” came a voice from just over my left shoulder. I turned around to see a woman whose face I hadn’t seen in years. Holly Franklin—Seth’s mom—stood there in a dark sweater and jeans. She stepped up close to me, like she wanted to hug me.

I tried to smile, but knew it wasn’t as genuine as she deserved. “Hello, Holly,” I replied, feeling the formality in my mouth.

She looked down at her feet, smiled her soft mother smile. It made me feel guilty for feeling off around her.

“I miss talking to you, girlie,” she said faintly. A heavy sigh settled between us. “You were like my daughter for so long, Mera. I swear I could beat that boy for doing what he did.”

I tried so hard not to think about it. To not let everything that Seth had done to me creep in at the edges of my senses. If it did, I would fall apart. I would sink beneath the edges of the past in a way that I couldn’t escape.

As if she could sense the rise in my pulse, the terror that seemed to burn in my veins, Holly stepped away. “I know my son isn’t always a good man. I know that he hurt you in a way that can never be forgotten. And, honey, know that I don’t expect you to patch anything up with him. He made this bed and he’s going to wallow in it. But I’ve watched you grow up. You were like one of my own. If you ever need anything, don’t you hesitate to pick up that phone and call me, do you understand?”

Something soothing wriggled in beneath the anxiety. I felt the corner of my mouth twitch up. “Yes, ma’am.”

Holly nodded as if all of it was settled. “And congratulations, sweetheart. Dean’s a good man. He’ll be a better one to you than my boy was. And I’m glad for that.”

________________________________________________________________

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#waking up in vegas #wuip #dean ambrose #dean ambrose fanfiction #seth rollins #wwe #wwe fanfiction #ofc #oc #mera reynolds #dean x mera #mera x dean #romance #angst

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overanalyzinglifesince1992 · 5 years

Text

Thursday

As my notebook sits in my lap while driving the winding roads of Echo Canyon and I scribble these thoughts onto the page, I know I must write. There is a being inside me screaming to get out. Clawing its way to the surface not knowing what form to take but yearning to be seen and heard - but where to begin? Maybe I’ve had it all wrong and the beginning isn’t the place to start at all. Maybe the answer is in the present moment in the form of this small town in Wyoming. Maybe the answer is to work my way back to the beginning.

“If you ever hear that crying in the distance like some siren. Maybe there's a singer with no ring around their little finger, no love And If I lose my voice If I have no choice but to go quiet Won't you sing for me a melody into the night there Well, if I die too young, if the wolf he comes Fee-fi-fo-fum If I die too young, oh, if the locust come Well then, run, run, run Free,”

Kevin Morby sings to me in my headphones and I recall my day.

How do I go from helping run a company and having 40 or so employees to suddenly lying in bed with no place to go,” I think to myself. I can already tell by how high the sun is that I’ve slept too long. My phone begins to ring and I am painfully reminded that my work here is not yet done. I feel stuck and ashamed that even though I wish I had more to do it feels like too much of a challenge to answer the phone and say, “hello,” as if I wasn’t stuck in my head contemplating my existence. None of the calls were from M which made me sink my face further into the pillow. It takes me a while to get out of bed but I eventually make my way to the kitchen and boil water for the french press. As I look around at the disheveled room I muster up enough energy to throw some clothes in the wash and file the paper work accumulating at the foot of my bed. I throw away old coupons and scribbled notes only to uncover a few envelopes addressed to ------ “little bit” MD which I hover over a moment before ripping up and throwing away only to panic and piece them together one last time as if it would save our friendship. I look at my phone and toss it to the bed after I see a few missed calls and texts from all the wrong people. I eat my breakfast and spend too much time cleaning and tinkering but not actually getting anything done besides listening to the same song on repeat which I’m convinced I must have set a record somewhere.

This is how my life goes. I get grand ideas and just as I start to go after them I let myself get side tracked by an adventure or man and feel as high as the moon until I’m disappointed to the point of oblivion or loneliness and next thing I know I’m off on a run trying to shake the feeling, eating a cookie in my car in the middle of the night, or sitting alone in my room wondering how so many hours have passed waiting for the next bout of inspiration.

NOON

I’m late for my meeting and it’s at this moment M decides to tell me how happy and free he is followed by a picture of him and his lover. It sounds as if he is saying goodbye after being MIA for a day and a half and I try not to curse as I realize things will never change. I have been a slave to his insecure temperament or better yet my own. While in the meeting I hear people share about needing one another and living a life we don’t deserve and all I can say before getting choked up to the point of embarrassment is that the insidiousness of my alcoholism and dis·ease creeps up and makes me so uncomfortable I could crawl out of my skin and how grateful I am to have their support. Some days I shine so bright I could light the souls of everyone in the room and stand up against old fuddy duddy’s trying to scold newcomers into staying sober and some days saying something -anything - out loud seems like a triumph. I talked with M A after the meeting and agreed to stop by her house to potentially rent it and again looked at her with appreciation and my first smile of the day as she talked with a big grin followed by an innocent giggle after talking which always warms my heart and leaves me wanting to heal her broken and newly sober heart after the passing of her husband, almost as if she was my own grandmother.

Lunch with G, a retired english teacher and pastor, and J, the retired hot shot executive who now walks with a cane but never misses a moment to share one of his wild stories of the high life never fails to make me laugh. Today they both gave me praises about being a joy to the rooms and started to pry about my love life and family. We had a lengthy conversation about my unwillingness to give up my autonomy to settle down followed by some of J’s stories of past wives and luxury problems like a prince wanting to marry his wife and how he worked too much and his children didn't like him dating someone his own age. G and I laughed and then I dove into my many questions about love and loss and why they thought the relationships failed adding in talk of finance and how they both got from point a to point b. By the end of the talk we had discussed the bible and religion, a woman on a leash getting out of a limo in Las Vegas, and a couple fatherly nudges to pursue my own career. There was talk of job opportunities and the argument about going to school to pursue money vs. dreams and if I was on the hunt for love or God or both. We eventually hugged and parted ways. I internally thanked them for filling my head with confidence.

Later, after walking around a local farmers market and running into a few friends I cruised over to M A’s house and spent an hour talking about her late husbands archeological work and her art work and then a story of how the two met. I watched her eyes sparkle as she reminisced about the beginning of their relationship and found myself feeling better and better. As she spoke about falling in love with the last blind date she ever went on I was reminded how much joy it brings me to simply have the privilege to hear so many stories. What a simple yet beautiful gift to peek into the lives of others gaining a bit of insight on what makes them tick. There seems to be some sort of answer or truth in it all but I can’t quite figure out what.

On my way home I received a call from --- inviting me to stop by and since I was on a roll I did just that. He drank and smoked pot and we laughed at how crazy of a summer it has been. We sat on the porch and looked over the acres of land and maybe it was the sunset or the booze talking but somewhere in our reflection of the difficult times and agreeing on the importance of having each others back he began to cry. For whatever reason on this particular night he shared with me what happened to him at age 27, a freak accident on the farm in which he backed over his friend, taking his life. It was all so heavy and I flashed through our entire friendship and his drug and alcohol use in the few years I knew him and before I knew what I was saying I asked if he believed in God or a higher power. I turned towards him and said, “it’s okay to forgive yourself. Do you know that?” I pointed to the mountains and the sun setting and insisted that there had to be a beautiful loving higher power with a greater plan and that some things happen for no reason. “It’s okay to let go and move forward. It was an accident and you can let go now. it’s okay.” And just like that, there was my inspiration. It’s in the stories of these strangers and friends. It is kinsmanship following tragedy. It is the shared moments in between all the things we ever hoped for. And just like that the gratitude for my life set in. I realized what strength is within me and how precious life is. So precious that I shouldn’t have to feel guilty for knowing what I want in my career, in my love life, and with my time. If I can experience this much in one day without worry about a HIM or an IT then what would life look like after a week or a month. If I can be so filled up after just half a day spent with others then what might I look like if I practiced letting those moments fill my spiritual cup rather than the connections I have?

I know this day was special but I’m too tired to continue.

Until soon.

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