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davidlcki · 1 year

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payment

pairing:low honor! arthur x reader

warnings: cursing, arthur is mean, being forced to drink, age gap, game typical violence. i think that’s it

summary: your parents take a loan from strauss, and when they can’t afford it, they send you off as payment instead. it’s a 3 day journey back to the van der linde camp. will you turn the notorious gunslinger soft?

an: please let me know how you guys feel about this one! i’ve been dealing with severe writers block so this took me MONTHS to write. it might not be my best, but i’m just happy to get something out. enjoy, i love you all! ❤️

words: 5,562 (my longest yet i think)

part 2

shouting from downstairs violently ripped you from your deep sleep, and quickly, you hopped out of bed. your hands shook as you slowly opened your door and made your way to the top of the steps.

“the money. NOW.”

you flinched at the harshness of the man’s words. instantly you knew it was the debt collectors, and that your family had nowhere near the amount needed to pay it off. you listened to your mother and father plead with the man for another week, but he wasn’t having it. at the sound of a gun cocking, your legs began to move on their own. you were bolting down the stairs.

“STOP! please, please don’t hurt them!” you hold your hands out desperately, standing between the man and your parents, who were dead silent. the man paused, the anger in his features seemed to be replaced with amusement. this was the moment that you recognized who this man was. you had seen him in many bounty posters around strawberry, he was arthur morgan.

“well now, why didn’t ya tell me about this fine young lady?” arthur’s gaze drifted from you to your parents, who were looking at each other with a look you couldn’t read. nervously, you looked between your parents and arthur. why weren’t they saying anything?

“she’ll do as payment just fine” arthur shrugs, holstering his gun and giving an easy smile, as if this was no big deal, just another day. you turned to your parents quickly, shaking your head and backing away from arthur.

“please don’t…” you looked between your mother and father desperately. finally, your father speaks.

“take her. if it works as payment, take her.” time seemed to slow as you stared at your father who wouldn’t look you in the eyes. your mother was looking down, you could tell she was holding back tears, but she stayed silent.

“what? wait, wait just-” you glanced at the door quickly, thinking of ways to escape. arthur, was quick to place his hand on his holstered gun.

“i wouldn’t, if i were you.” arthur’s voice was suddenly much lower, and his easy smile was gone in an instant. you knew there was no other way. you turned to your parents, lips in a flat line as you stared at them. you were thinking of what you could possibly say to them, when arthur’s rough hand had a grip on your upper arm.

“your own daughter…for some fucking cash…” your voice was shaky as you were being pulled towards the door. barely having time to slip your boots on, you give your parents one last look before you were out of sight.

for a while, it was silent. you were too in shock to cry or do much of anything, but think.

“we’ll camp here for the night” arthur’s voice startled you out of your thoughts, most of them being how to escape this situation. for now, he had at least some form of trust in you, considering your hands were untied.

arthur morgan was more of a myth than a person, to you. you heard the stories of the hundreds he’s killed and you knew this was probably a bad idea, but you needed to try an escape. once he hopped off his horse, you grabbed onto the reigns and kicked your heels into its sides, but it didn’t budge. the damned horse stayed dead still. the air seemed to thicken as you continued to attempt to get the horse to take off with a series of ‘hyah’s’ and ‘go’s’, but his horse was loyal, seeming to listen to him and only him. when you looked over, you swore you saw flames in arthur’s eyes.

plan b.

from the horse, you deliver a kick into arthur’s chest with all the power you could muster. just as his horse, he dosent budge. arthur lunges forwards, pulling you off the horse roughly and ignoring the protests coming from you as he threw you over his shoulder. you pounded relentlessly on his back, but he didn’t so much as flinch. instead, he tightened his grip on you, nearly squandering your ability to breathe. once finding a clearing about 30 feet into the woods, he throws you onto the grass and pulls out his lasso. you take a few seconds to catch your breath, but you don’t have time to move or get any words out. effortlessly, arthur ties the rope around your wrists and ankles before you could flip over, rendering you immobile.

“bastard! you let me go!” you finally manage to turn yourself onto your back and struggle against the rope that dug into your skin. arthur, clearly unamused at your shouting, sinks down to your level on the ground. his hips were nearly straddling yours as he kneeled and grabbed your face with a rough hand.

“watch it girl.” his voice was drawn out and easy, giving you the impression that he’s done this many times before. he releases his grip on your jaw, and brushes a strand of hair from your forehead. “don’t forget i know where you live. dont try nothin’, less you’re fixin’ to watch your parents die”.

“i don’t…. i don’t care about them anymore. they sold me. pawned me like trash.” your voice was shaky as you spoke up at him, and for a while the both of you sat and stared at each other, heavy breath fanning over your faces. arthur almost had a look of understanding for a moment. it was true. you were angry at them for so carelessly giving you away for their own benefit. in fact, you didn’t know who you were angrier at. arthur, or your own parents. finally, arthur hums and stands. you didn’t dare move from your spot on the ground, instead, you silently watched arthur set up camp. you really were afraid that he’d kill you if you so much as moved. you could see in his eyes that he was only going to let that trick you tried slide once.

you shivered and let out a ragged exhale, still catching your breath as the wind was knocked out of you not long ago. you were desperate for fire, for any kind of warmth. you were only in boots and a thin nightgown, that did much of nothing as the cold from the ground seeped into you.

“cold?” arthur stands next to your shivering frame on the ground. you say nothing, instead giving him an unamused glare. you refused to let him see you cry, so you threw on your best angry facade. you stiffened as he leaned down and lifted you, not letting out a breath of air until you were put down again. now, you were resting against a tree in front of the fire. you let out an inner sigh of relief at the warmth. arthur sits across from the fire, taking a bite of jerky from his satchel.

“so, that’s your parents farm huh? pretty nice, all considering.” arthur pauses, but you say nothing. “live there your whole life?” you didn’t even really hear his question as you asked your own.

“where are you takin’ me?” you watch arthur’s face carefully as he takes a drag from his cigarette.

“you’re joining the gang” arthur flicks the end of his cigarette, the ashes slowly float to the ground. “we need more hands. more people to help fight.”

“i’m no good at fighting” your voice was quiet, you were starting to realize you weren’t getting out of this.

“you will be. now,” arthur stands up and pulls more rope from his horses satchel “rest up, got a long day of riding tomorrow” you scoff as he begins to wrap the rope around you and the tree you were against.

“is this necessary?” arthur says nothing, instead pulling the rope tighter. after, he goes back to his spot, pulling his hat over his face and letting out a rather large sigh. for a long time, you didn’t sleep. instead, you relentlessly tugged and pulled at the rope restraining you. you knew it was pointless, but you couldn’t help trying. your face twisted in pain as your arms scratched against the rough tree bark. arthur must have been very confident in the knots he tied, because you very quickly heard soft snores drifting from across the fire. after what seemed like hours, and a few shed tears, you fell into a restless sleep.

•••

when you awoke the next morning, arthur was up, packing supplies into his horses satchel and humming to himself softly. you stayed silent, observing the man who was so mean to you do a task so mundane. when you looked down, you noticed arthur’s brown coat was thrown over your frame. it smelled like tobacco and gunpowder. when arthur noticed you were up, he quickly took his jacket back and went over to untie the rope holding you to the tree.

“morning sunshine” he throws you a smile as he pulls the rope from around the tree off, along with the rope on your ankles.

“i trust you won’t run”

“no” your voice was hoarse and you shivered violently as the wind attacked your bare skin that was previously covered. arthur stopped, thinking for a second as he took in your frame with a slow look from your head to your ankles and back up again. he pulls you to your feet, letting you catch your footing on wobbly legs as he rummaged around for his canteen. he flicks the cap off and grabs your jaw so roughly and suddenly that you let out an involuntary gasp of shock. he turns your face towards him and inspects you for a second before continuing. you could only wonder what he was thinking, his lip twitching ever so slightly into the ghost of a smile as he continued.

“drink” he puts the canteen to your mouth and watches as you desperately gulped down the water. after about 5 seconds, he pulled it away, taking a swig of the liquid himself before stowing it back on his horse.

“long ride ahead,” arthur lifts you onto his horse before hopping in front of you in the saddle, “gonna take a few days i reckon, so get comfortable”.

arthur wasn’t lying. you rode all day, so long that you couldn’t remember what direction you came from or how to get back home. although that outcome was unlikely now. desperate to escape the cold, you pressed yourself against arthur’s back. you felt him stiffen at the contact, but were too cold to care. you couldn’t count the hours it’d been, and for a while you were pretty sure you fell asleep. throughout the day, you only made a few stops. one for bathroom breaks, and one for his horse to rest. the rest of the day was a blur, not much was said, and the only noise you heard was the trotting of hoofs on the ground and the rustle of trees in the wind. when the sun began to set, arthur finally pulled to a stop.

“seems like a good spot” arthur observes the clearing, giving you a stern look before hopping off of his horse, remembering the stunt you pulled last time.

“gonna tie me to a tree again?” your voice was dripping in sarcasm as you allowed him to pull you off the horse.

“you gonna make me?” arthur’s tone matched yours as he pulled out his bedroll and some other supplies. you waited for the extra rope to come, but it never did. arthur instead unties your hands, then reties them in front of you. you audibly sigh at the discomfort that began to dissipate, and you rolled your shoulders a few times in satisfaction.

“y’ dont wanna run off in these parts,” arthur warns as the fire lights up the clearing. “the people will get to ya before the animals do.” you said nothing in response. for a few hours, you stayed dead silent. ignoring arthur’s snarky comments and nothing more than blinking when he’d toss the end of a cigarette or a twig off the ground at you. arthur began to heat a small can of stew, smiling teasingly as he watches you eye it. he pulls gin out of his pocket, downing a hefty swig.

“if you want some, you gotta speak, girl.” arthur eats a large scoop of stew, groaning dramatically in satisfaction in an attempt to tease you.

“fuck you. that enough?” arthur snorts a laugh at your response, deciding to give you a bite. you quickly chew and swallow it, savoring the taste.

“what’s your name anyway?” arthur pauses, scooping out some more stew and holding it up. “you answer me if you wanna eat.”

“Y/N. Y/N L/N” arthur feeds you the stew and downs more gin. halfway through the bottle now.

“Y/N” the way your name rolled off his tongue sent a chill down your spine. “you gotta pretty name, Y/N. how old are ya?”

you eye the man for a while, before looking back down to the tempting spoon of stew. “i’m 22. now can you feed me the god damn food?” you were getting testy now, watching arthur eat and down almost an entire bottle of gin while you’ve had nothing for over a day will do that to you.

“you got a mouth on ya!” arthur let’s out a laugh, feeding you another bite and finishing the rest of the stew himself. he stands up, stretching his legs and yawning, before walking over to you casually. nervously, you watch as arthur squats down to be eye level with you.

“sleep” a small smile crosses his face, confusing you. then, he places a hand on your shoulder and shoves you to the side so you’re in a laying position in the grass. a yelp escapes your lips as you hit the ground. “night”

you watch in disbelief as arthur goes to his spot on the bed roll, very quickly falling asleep with his hat on his face as usual. now was your turn. you thought about running, but had a feeling that arthur wasn’t lying about the people around these parts. slowly, you drifted to sleep in the damp grass.

•••

you woke up to the sound of footsteps crunching in the dead leaves. instantly you were alert. when you looked over, arthur was still passed out. you guessed the gin running through his veins was doing its work. you stayed silent, sitting up slowly and looking into the dark of the forrest around you. the fire was almost out at this point. you tugged anxiously at the ropes binding your hands. there were the footsteps again, from behind you this time. you knew those weren’t from an animal. before you could react, a man came running out of the woods. he was on you in seconds, knife in hand. you let out a scream of terror as you were slammed onto your back. you squeezed your eyes shut, preparing for the knife to be plunged into your chest, but it never came. instead, there was a gunshot that seemed to shake the forest. when you opened your eyes, there was a bullet hole between the eyes of the man as he crumpled on top of you. the weight of him smothered the cry that you tried to let out. arthur was over in seconds, shoving the body off of you and pulling you to a sitting position. there was genuine worry that you saw for a mere second in his face.

“y’ alright?” he was still blinking the sleep from his eyes as he looked you over for stab wounds. he was half awake, trying to make sense of what was going on. as you opened your mouth to speak, another man emerged from the dark of the woods. he shoved arthur over, effectively knocking the gun from his hands. you were in a trance, looking between arthur, the man, and the pistol laying right in front of you. arthur’s voice startled you out of it. his voice was strained as he called your name out, he was using all his strength to hold the knife mere inches away from his chest. with your tied hands, you picked up the pistol. it was heavier than you expected.

“do… it…” his eyes pleaded with you, meanwhile, the tip of the knife was beginning to sink into his chest. without anymore hesitation, you aimed at the attackers head and pulled the trigger. your ears rung more than the first gunshot that was fired earlier, and you noticed the almost painful vibrations that flowed through your hands. arthur let’s out a sigh of relief, pushing the body off of him and sitting up, before quickly freezing again. he stared at you blankly as you continued to point the pistol at him.

“Y/N…” he holds his hands up and shakes his head. “y’ don’t wanna do this”

you looked at him for a long while, tears were dripping down your cheeks and your hands were shaking violently. you were debating killing him right here and now. but how would you make it in there woods? how would you find your way back? then, you remembered why you were here in the first place, and how your parents threw you out without a thought. finally, slowly, you lowered the gun, arthur took this oppertunity to snatch it from your hands, before audibly exhaling. he watched carefully as you broke down in tears, hugging onto yourself the best you could with tied hands and trying to wipe blood off of your nightgown.

“hey… i uh…” arthur didnt know what to say as he placed a hand upon your shoulder in attempted reassurance. to his surprise, you threw yourself into his embrace. slowly, he wrapped his arms around your frame and listened to you cry. he noticed the red marks on your wrists under the rope, and was shocked at the pang of guilt he felt. without thinking, he takes out his hunting knife and cuts the rope off of you. you use this time to wrap your arms around his waist. arthur slowly runs a hand up and down your back as you continued to sob.

“i’m scared, arthur.” was all you could get out. you had never killed a man before, and the reality was setting in. all arthur could do was mutter an awkward series of ‘it’s alright’ and ‘i’m here’s’ until you calmed down enough to let go. arthur was almost sad at the loss of your presence, and he wished he could rip this part of him out. this part that yearned for love and affection and what he was just finding out, you. half of him screamed as he draped his coat around your shoulders, while the other half cheered.

you avoided eye contact with the gunslinger as you attempted to get your tears under control, pulling his coat around yourself gingerly.

“thank you… for not letting me be killed” you kept your eyes on the fire, too afraid to look at arthur or the bodies or the blood on your skin.

“and thank you, for not shootin’ me along with this feller” you let out a scoff, lips twitching up into a small smile you mustered up. arthur took the time to move the bodies away from camp and your sight, eventually returning and sitting down again. there was a new feeling in the air between you and the gunslinger. a bond forged in blood and death. arthur never tied your hands again, and he kept watch the rest of the night. though neither of you got another wink of sleep, you stayed close to each other, shoulders touching as you sat side by side. you asked arthur plenty of questions about his gang. you were genuinely curious what it was like. you could tell he was fond of them by the way his features softened at just the thought. you realized, they were family, and it didn’t sound so bad. after hours of trying to will the sun to come up faster, it finally rose, and you were more than glad to keep moving.

you couldn’t tell how long it’d been now. you slept for a while the way you have been, your face pressed against arthur’s back in a somewhat comfortable position, but when you opened your eyes again you were in a town. upon reading the sign, you realized it was valentine. you could hear the chatter in the distance, and your eyes lit up with surprise. it had been days since you’d seen another person besides arthur. arthur must have felt you sit up straighter, because he quickly stopped his horse and looked back at you.

“i trust you’re not gonna try no shit?” he asks, exhaling cigarette smoke from his lungs. you hold back the urge to cough as the smoke wafts over your face. he observes you for a second more before straightening your messy hair. you knew it was so you looked more presentable to the town, but it was oddly gentle, intimate.

“no, but people are going to ask questions, arthur.” you spit his name out, and reference down to your now dirty and tattered nightgown. you were upset at the shift between you both after what you went through the night before, and it was hard for you to contain your anger as you spoke. the lack of food and clean clothes was starting to get to you. arthur stares at you for a while, before sighing heavily. though he still gave you attitude, you were surprised with the patience he was beginning to keep with you.

“okay… here” after a second of thinking, he pulled his coat off and placed it around your shoulders once again. casually, the two of you trotted into town, slowing to a stop at the hotel. you ignored the stares the townsfolk gave you as you walked inside. being in a tattered gown and a jacket two big was definitely turning heads.

“one bath for the lady please” arthur tosses the owner a coin and nudges you towards the bath house. once in front of the door, he grabs your wrist and turns you towards him.

“you clean up, i’ll be right back. dont get no ideas of runnin’ off now, because i will find you.” his voice was low as he looked down at you, though you were starting to notice the facade he was putting up. the way he gently held your wrist told you all you needed to know, and unbeknownst to him, you weren’t really planning on leaving. the last place you wanted to go, was back home.

“wouldnt dream of it” your voice was dripping with sarcasm as you pulled your wrist from his grip and pushed your way into the bath house.

once you finished cleaning up, you pulled the towel around yourself and waited awkwardly, leaning from foot to foot as you waited for arthur to come back. the last thing you wanted was to put your old clothes on, so you stood by the fire and slowly dried off. finally, arthur pushed his way into the bath house holding a bag. he froze for a second as he took in your frame, only covered by the small towel. once you started walking towards him, he looked anywhere but at you as he handed you the bag. you say nothing, pulling the clothes out and dropping your towel as you began to pull them on. it was a simple brown dress with yellow detailing on the sleeves, collar, and bottom. you could tell arthur had picked it out, considering how it matched to his own clothes. there was also a new night gown in the bag, and you smiled to yourself.

“could you?” you turn away from the man who was doing most anything but look at you. when he shifted his gaze to you again, your back was turned to him, revealing an unlaced corset.

“yeah… yeah sure” arthur’s hands gingerly fiddled with the string, trying his best to will away the reddening of his cheeks as he observed your exposed back. it had been forever since he had been with another woman, and he cursed the feelings arising in him for you. you turned towards him afterwards, unable to help the smile of relief from being in clean clothes.

“you… you look nice” arthur looks down at your dress, then quickly he turns and pulls you out of the bathhouse with him before you can utter a ‘thank you’.

“you hungry?” arthur wasn’t really asking as the two of you headed towards the saloon, though you almost cried tears of joy at the thought of food. with a glance to the clock on the wall, you realized it was already 6PM. the scent of food that floated through the saloon nearly made you drool. eagerly, you sat at the bar and waited for your steak and potatoes that arthur ordered to arrive.

“2 whiskeys please” arthur tosses a few coins at the bartender who nods in compliance.

“oh i… i don’t drink” arthur looks at you straight faced, sliding the shot glass to you.

“drink” his eyes stayed trained on you all the way until the shots were taken, the burning liquid slides down your throat roughly. arthur let out a hardy laugh as you coughed, instantly digging into your food as it arrived to get rid of the taste.

“another” arthur tosses more coins, not batting an eye when you protest.

“i’m not drinking anymore, arthur!” you glare in his direction angrily. arthur pauses for a while, before leaning in close and bringing the shot to your lips.

“drink the damn whiskey girl.” his voice was low and gravelly as he parted your lips with his thumb, before tilting the shot glass forward. nervously, you swallowed it. this moment reminded you that you were still technically being kidnapped by him, and that he wasn’t messing around. arthur smiles a little, taking his own shot.

“good girl.” you silently turn back to your food, eating slowly and trying to keep track of the amount of shots he was taking. eventually it became too many to count. luckily, he didn’t make you take anymore, too preoccupied with himself.

“arthur that’s enough, let’s go” it had been an hour now, and arthur was shitfaced. the wooziness you had began to feel went away quickly as you scarfed down your food. “you’re drunk”

“am not” arthur smiled lazily, attempting to order another drink, but you snatch the coins from his hand and tell the bartender we’re done. arthur gets up angrily, towering over your frame that was still sat on the stool. he opens his mouth to speak, but instead bumps shoulders with another man who was walking past.

“you bastard! watch it” arthur shoves the man back, sending him tumbling into another man behind him. shit.

in a flash, it was an all out fight between, well, you couldn’t count how many men. you stumbled back, trying to look for arthur in the crowd of men. finally, you spotted him falling to the ground and out of sight again. you debated for a while. do you wanna keep saving this fool? you bounced from foot to foot anxiously, cursing under your breath before bracing yourself and shoving your way through the fighting men. you dodged punches left and right, some of them had to have hit you, but your adrenaline blocked out the pain. finally, you spotted arthur on the ground unconscious.

“son of a bitch!” your voice was drowned out by the shouting, but you finally managed to hook your arms under arthur’s and drag him from the fighting, all the way outside, to the hotel across the street.

“one room please” you spoke to the clerk between heavy breaths, fishing into arthur’s pockets and pulling out the last coins he had for the room. you realized how bad this looked, so you tried to explain yourself. “i- i know him, i swear.” the clerk just nods wearily, recognizing the two of you from earlier and handing you the key. with help of the clerk, you got arthur into the bed.

the next hour or so you spent wiping arthur’s face down with any cloth and water you could find. he looked bad, face bruised and bloody, clothes ripped, you couldn’t help but think he looked beautiful even in this state. finally, you turned to the mirror to tend to your own wounds, which happened to only be a few bruises on your arms and ribs. you sigh in frustration at the new rip on the side of your dress. you almost didn’t notice as arthur began to wake.

“oh… what… happened?” arthur’s voice was slurred as he sat up slowly, wincing in pain and blinking hard.

“you almost fucking died, that’s what!” your voice was nearly bubbling over with anger as you stormed from the mirror over to him. “and so did i, pulling you out from all those men. you’re lucky i haven’t ran off or killed ya! you’re a fool, arthur. a damned fool.” you were tired of holding back your anger, you were pushed to your limit with him. arthur was looking at the bruises on your arms and your waist through your ripped dress, then up at you with the most puppy dog eyed look you’d seen on him.

“m’ sorry.” arthur’s voice was quiet as he spoke and you watched as a drop of blood trickled out of the corner of his mouth. “really, you can go. after the hell i dragged you through…” arthur scoffs a laugh and looks to the side. when you don’t speak, or leave, he looks back at you with confusion.

“i’m not gonna leave.” you paused for a while, trying to decide if this was the right decision. “i wanna join the gang.” arthur’s eyes widen at your words, but he nods slowly in response.

“i knew you’d come around” he smiles what you assumed was a genuine one. he then begins to stand, nearly toppling over on you before you grab onto him, steadying him.

“jesus, take it easy!” you push him back down into a sitting position on the bed and lean closer to his face. “i hope you have some doctors in your gang. you’re going to need stitches” you wipe at the blood on corner of his mouth with your thumb and sigh as you observe his wounds once more. when you went to pull away, arthur grabbed your wrist gently. your breath caught in your throat as you looked into his eyes nervously. you didn’t know what he was thinking. his face was unreadable. was he angry? you couldn’t tell. you opened your mouth to speak. you were going to utter your best form of apology for your assumed anger on his part, but arthur silenced you by leaning forwards and pressing his lips against yours. you let out a smothered gasp against his lips, taking a stumbling step back and tilting your head up as arthur stands again. a quiet moan of pain escapes his lips as he leans some of his weight against you. after a few moments of silence, that felt to you like minutes, you pull away, turning your head from him in uncertainty. you didn’t know what you wanted. if this was right. he was dangerous, you knew that, but something about him drew you in dangerously.

“i… i just” you tried to find the words, anything to say to him, but your feelings were like a big tangled ball of string and you couldn’t figure it out.

“i’m sorry.” arthur cuts you off, letting out a cough of pain as he backs off, limping his way to the other side of the room.

“let’s rest. we can talk about things tomorrow.” you watched in disbelief as he laid himself down on the floor by the entrance of the room, pulling his hat over his eyes and breathing deep. you could taste his blood on your lips. you took this time to change into your new night gown and toss your dress to the side. you assumed it would be trash, being unable to sew or afford a tailor.

upon crawling into bed, you fell asleep almost instantly. you missed the feeling of a bed after sleeping on the ground for days. you slept through the entire night, ignoring the throb of your bruises and the commotion of the streets of valentine. when you awoke in the morning, the first thing you noticed was that arthur was gone. the second thing you noticed, was your dress, folded neatly at the end of your bed. slowly, you crawled over and unfolded it, noticing the rip had been carefully sewn shut. with it, there was a piece of paper.

“i’m sorry for what i put you through. you deserve a choice. if you want to run with us, i won’t stop you. if you want to go back to your family, you have my word you won’t see me again.

-A”

upon flipping the note, there was the location of the gangs camp. you knew what you were going to do.

part 2

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gatheredfates · 2 months

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I'VE BEEN TRAINING FOR MURDER / WEEDKILLER

#｡･ﾟﾟ･ — 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 : sarrai #my edits #ok take two tumblr apparently said i have no rights #i spent HOURS on this #I NEVER WANT TO POSE BODIES LIKE THAT AGAIN IT WAS MURDER #haha get it #murder #i'll see myself out

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callibones · 2 years

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#rhythm heaven remix #rhythm heaven #breaking bad #i dont know how to make visuals (yet)#so this is audio only for now!#but... maybe ill figure it out #soon #i hope #in the meanwhile. um #i thought ppl might like this #i looked it up and i couldnt find anyone whos already done it?#which really surprised me #maybe i just didnt look hard enough idk #i spent hours on this #but i spent the most time on the you are not the guy section. because i tried like 7 different minigames #wanted to pay my respects #oh and its all rhythm heaven fever cause thats the only one ive played LMAO

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neat-o-things · 1 year

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The narrators true form ?? Or like a half way point, otherwise he’s just papers and hands and shapes

#fandom #fanart #art #the stanley parable #tsp #tspud #tsp fanart #tsp stanley #tsp narrator #tspud stanley #tspud narrator #tspud art #tsp art #i spent hours on this #but there he is !!#my artwork

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d00msd4y · 4 months

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Spspsps, scourge fans pspspsps come get yo juice

*shaking food bowl*

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duxwriter · 2 months

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"You don't know what i've done"

#artwork #art #lore olympus edit #lore olympus critical #lo persephone #anti lore olympus #lo #lore olympus persephone #i spent hours on this

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1863-project · 8 months

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For the anon Pokémon asks: which battle subway conductor is the cutest?

Okay, this may get long, so bear with me.

First, a little disclaimer: Ingo and Emmet both make me feel incredibly seen. I was born in 1989 and wasn't diagnosed with autism until 2009, and I never got to see characters like me. I'd see some who were similar to me, or some with things in common with me, but Ingo and Emmet feel like looking in a mirror to me, to the point that I don't go in the Submas tag because I've seen too many people perpetuating the ableism that got me bullied as an undiagnosed autistic kid. Every time an autistic or autistic-coded character is portrayed as "weird" or "off-putting" or "too intense" or "scary," it's repeating things that my bullies used to excuse their behavior towards me and essentially treat me and my autism as entertainment. Most people aren't doing this, of course, but since I'm in the process of working through a lot of that trauma, I choose not to take the chance of exposing myself to it because I'd rather heal instead of open old wounds again and again.

Anyway, with that said, I adore them both, but only one of them makes me act like a giddy teenager.

I have the most ridiculous fictional character crush on Emmet. It's unreal. Part of that is likely the fact that if he was real we'd actually be extremely compatible, but unfortunately for me, he is not, and so I can't take him on locomotive photo charter dates and kiss him on the City Hall looparound on the 6 Train. That aside, here's what I genuinely like about the goober.

He's deeply passionate about what he loves.

It's that passion that often gets people like him and me labeled as "too intense," but when he likes something, he really likes something. Battling is like air to him. When you befriend him in Masters EX, you find he'll actually talk your ear off about battling if you give him the opportunity. He vibrates with excitement when he sees strong trainers.

[Image description: Emmet and Ingo, two adult identical twin men with knife-shaped sideburns wearing exaggerated versions of railroad conductor uniforms, stare off to the left at people who are off-screen. Emmet, in a white uniform, is holding his hands at his sides but his hands are in an excited, almost 'grabby' position; Ingo, in a black uniform, also has his hands at his sides but his hands are balled into fists. Ingo's Excadrill, a Pokemon that looks like a mole combined with a tunneling machine, stands in front of him. End description.]

In this screenshot from Masters EX, Emmet and Ingo have just run into Steven Stone and Roark. Emmet is barely holding back, and you can tell by looking at his hands. He wants to battle now. It's delightful that he's in a franchise of video games where that passion is normalized and encouraged. (As long as he never visits Paldea, anyway. Nemona is proof of how well that would go.)

Battling makes Emmet genuinely so happy and excited and I love when people get that way about their hobbies. It's so nice to see passionate people. Emmet even says he's excited about it when you battle him in Black and White and beat him at the highest level possible:

"I am Emmet. I am a Subway Boss, but I lost against you again. But I feel good. Because it was very fun! You want to win, and I don't want to lose. That's real. When we clash in battles, I feel very excited!"

[Source]

He lives for this, so much that even losing a really intense, serious battle feels good. And it's a delight. But, of course...

[Image description: Emmet, described above, claps his hands together excitedly and says "Winning a serious, hard-fought battle is the best feeling in the world!" with a huge smile on his face. End description.]

...he, in his own words, likes winning "more than anything else."

He's verrrry direct in his communication...but also verrrry supportive.

Autistic folks are often told we're too blunt, and to neurotypicals, who are used to saying things more indirectly, we can come off as a bit...too direct to them, to say the least. Arguably the best example of Emmet doing this is in the PokeSpe manga, where he just says things without a filter.

[Image description: a manga panel in which Emmet bluntly tells trainer White, "Yes, we're studying you as an example of a trainer who gets overwhelmed and loses every single match." The next panel leads off with Ingo saying "That's not nice, Emmet..." End description.]

But that bluntness isn't intended maliciously, he just has no filter and says what's on his mind. In reality, he's delightfully supportive and friendly, and that honesty leads to the most wonderful exchanges with him:

[Image description: two screenshots of Emmet from Pokemon Masters EX, smiling softly. His dialogue reads, "Hi, Steph! Your smile is always the best. Perfect! Whenever I see you, I can't help but smile, too! I'll have to make sure my smile is just as good as yours!" End description.]

As a side note, this dialogue has been destroying me for over two years now, and every time I boot up the game and he says this I feel my face get warm. He's actually helped me stop being self-conscious about my smile.

He has a habit of listening in on things, even if he has no intention of gossiping or anything. He just likes knowing stuff.

It's a habit he seems to share with his brother, but Ingo is significantly less obvious and more apologetic about it. Emmet's just really funny about it.

[Image description: two manga panels and one screenshot from Masters EX. The first manga panel shows Emmet marching over to White and Bianca as they have a discussion, saying, "I'm overhearing an interesting discussion over here. It seems profound, so I'm going to stand nearby and listen in. Oh, don't let me distract you. Go on. Keep talking." The second panel shows Emmet cupping his ear with his hand and still attempting to listen in on the discussion from one subway car away, with Ingo standing behind him. The screenshot from Masters EX shows Ingo hiding his eyes with his hat and saying, "I apologize for eavesdropping, but we happened to overhear your conversation at the Pokemon Center" as Emmet stands beside him, hands on his hips and smiling with no shame. End description.]

He doesn't use the information maliciously, and a lot of the time he doesn't even use it at all. He just enjoys hearing these things and knowing all sorts of weird drama is going on elsewhere. It's like when you find out about drama in a fandom you're not in and you read the posts and eat popcorn. It's great.

He likes his work uniform because it helps his posture.

As a fellow "leans forward too much" autistic, this one really resonates with me and I love it.

[Image description: A screenshot of Emmet in Pokemon Masters EX. He's standing straight up and holding the brim of his hat with his hand. His dialogue reads, "Wearing it gets me motivated, of course! It also helps me stand up straight and tall!" End description.]

He stops scripting when he gets to know people better because he's able to trust them.

Notice how his dialogue in BW and BW2 is on the Battle Subway - "I'm Emmet. This is my job. I like doubles. This is why I like doubles. Here are the safety checks." He's scripting around people he's not familiar with, and it's the sort of thing that gets autistic people labeled as "robotic" by people who don't know it's a way to help us maintain some semblance of control over an unfamiliar situation. The preprepared dialogue is a coping method in an ableist world. But when you get to know him in Masters, the scripted dialogue shows up a lot less. He's able to talk genuinely and excitedly to you, because he knows you're safe to be around and you're not going to judge him for who he is. That hits me hard.

He has the most adorable goddamned laugh in the world and it kills me on the daily.

This is a lot more in line with my personal tastes, as everyone who knows me well knows, but that damn laugh makes me all fluttery inside and weak in the knees. And he does it a LOT.

This update to Masters EX, where the characters laugh if you tap on them on the upgrade screen, destroyed me, and multiple people were apparently waiting for me to find it and die because I'm really predictable. I may or may not regularly pull the screen up just to poke at him and hear this. It's...not fair.

This one is...also unfair. I won't elaborate in public on what I think when I hear it because it's embarrassing.

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So, uh...yeah. I really, really like Emmet a lot. I'm really normal about Emmet. I promise.

#replies #Pokemon #Submas #this man literally makes me so giddy and ridiculous #it's so silly but I'm having a good time and he's helping me work through a lot of stuff on the side #I spent hours on this #I always spend hours on posts where I talk about Emmet

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dilfsuzanneyk · 9 months

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it was only a matter of time before i drew some germs art

#click for better quality please idk why tumblr NUKED this #i spent hours on this #im soooso normal about germs by weird al hahahahahahaha i am not insane im not crazy #weird al yankovic #weird al #does my art vex you #where's that one nin comment that's like #you wanna WHAT

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boxalienist · 2 years

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Anakin Skywalker becomes One with the Force

Pose Reference:

Falling Star - Witold Pruszkowski

Buy the print

#i spent hours on this #if this flops i will cry #anakin skywalker #he’s finally at peace #darth vader #return of the Jedi #star wars rotj #luke skywalker #boxalienist #star wars #Star Wars art #obi wan kenobi #obi wan #kenobi tv #kenobi Series #anakin and obi wan

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maxwellamus · 3 months

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some of yall have never listened to mr capgras encounters a secondhand vanity: tulpamancer's prosopagnosia /pareidolia (as direct results of trauma to the fusiform gyrus)- 2020 remastered version by will wood and the tapeworms while experiencing the wrath of god on the shitter and it shows.

#lactose intolerance #please god #btw i had some mac n cheese right after #i dont learn #will wood and the tapeworms #wwattw #this is not a shitpost #i spent hours on this #pure gold post #spotifys playing #alastors game by the livingtomestone rn #lowkey devouring

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gay-jewish-bucky · 2 years

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#i spent hours on this #marvel #mcu #stevebucky #stucky #wintercap #steve rogers #steven grant rogers #bucky #bucky barnes #james bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #nomad #captain america #steve rogers/bucky barnes #steve rogers x bucky barnes

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nightcrawlerzincorporated · 2 years

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Emodennis recently tried to name all the episodes of its always sunny for fun so.

I decided to turn it into an actual game because I wanted to try it too! Here it is: the can you name every sunny episode quiz!

#iasip #it’s always sunny in philadelphia #it’s always sunny #i spent hours on this #hope y’all have fun with it lol #I know uquizzes are more popular rn but this is more fun. for me #tell me your results I’d love to know #also let me know if I should add more hints or anything #it’s always sunny quiz tag #⭐️

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padfoot0216 · 1 year

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TK Strand is Autistic. (I have evidence I just thought I would start with that. Straight to the point you know)

I would also like to say this is written by an autistic person who has done hours of research in autism. So I kind of know what I’m talking about I think.

Special Interest (there isn’t a lot for this one but there is some soo)

So the first example is from season 2 episode 2. Mateo is talking about his new tattoo and mentions TK’s tattoo. He says “You’re the one with the beetle in your arm.” to TK. TK responds with, “It’s not a beetle it’s a honey bee.” And then without and prompting says l, “Did you know honey bees pollinate a third of our food supply?” I know that by itself it’s not exactly great evidence. Combined with everything else I will speak about it fits. Like the only prompting he had for this random bee fact was Mateo bringing up the tattoo.

Monotone Voice/Flat Face

Every single episode. It’s especially noticeable when he’s working. He has very little facial expression and his voice stays flat. I was going to try and find a scene that I could link here but it’s really difficult to find a scene that’s not just him and Carlos or him just passed out, and I feel like using a clip of him being passed out wouldn’t really prove my point, but if you compare his facial expressions and voice to there during very intense events you’ll notice it. Such as Season 3 Episode 11. The whole capital building is shut down and everyone on the team has at least a little bit of worry on their faces, but TK looks so unbothered. Like this is completely normal. He is obviously worried but it doesn’t really show. The only time he really has expression is around Carlos. I know there are definitely some other exceptions, but a majority of the time this applies.

Stimming (There is so much evidence for this)

TK stims in literally every episode. I’m not going to put every example because that would take literally hours and although I do have time for that I don’t want to. So we’ll start with season 1 episode 4 when TK goes to chemo with his dad. Now this one could just be him being anxious but I have more I swear. Just watch the first 12 seconds of the clip. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uHp4ME6v7MA. Okay another example or I could say examples is him just messing with his hands. At all times. He never stops. If you watch him during the show you’ll notice this. I would put examples but once again way too many. The next one that comes to mind is TK during season 3 episode 19 when they hold the intervention for Nancy and Mateo towards the end of the episode. If you watch him throughout the entire scene you’ll see it but the part I’m talks about is between 46 seconds and 48 seconds of the clip I’m about to give the link to. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_7rtPmn99i8. The last one I’m going to mention despite there being so much more is TK during season 4 episode 8. Once again if you watch you’ll see him stimming throughout it, but the particular scene I’m talking about is when he fires his dad. The more he gets upset the more you see it. It is literally just this whole scene. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ILcATWsXrsM

Being Upset By Change

I only have two examples of this but I think they fit pretty well. The first one also comes from season 3 episode 17. He is having the conversation about catan with Nancy, and seems very hesitant about changing from catan. To be fair they all were but he could t even begin to understand why she would want to change it. It all starts when Nancy says, “We’re both over Catan.” TK at this point gets really confused because who wouldn’t want to play the same game every time they have a game night because he certainly would. He responds with “Over Catan? But that’s like our national pastime Nance.” Later in this conversation Nancy says, “I think it’d be good for all of us to change things up. Spice of life.” The way TK responds once again shows how uncomfortable he is with the change. Replying with “Catan is spicy” after she left. The second example is from season 2 episode 6 when TK finds out he’s going to have a little brother. This might just be me but it seems a little out of character for TK to be jealous of having a sibling. It might be a bit if a stretch but if I’m right it could easily be attributed to that.

Sensory Issues

Okay so I can only think of a couple examples of this but will start with this one . The never ending collection of hoodies. He obviously is very attached to his hoodies. To the point where in his coma dream his mom (his subconscious) says “so many innocent hoodies lost their lives that day.” We also often see him wearing his hoodies after a particularly stressful day, but he wears them all the time. Like he has an endless supply. Where does he store all of them? The second example I have is a little better. It’s from season 3 episode 3. At the beginning of the coma dream TK is hearing a beeping noise and he doesn’t exactly know what it is but he has a very strong reaction to the noise. The specific part I’m talking about is at 1:20 seconds of the video that I’m going to put a link to. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=B7uSxmVt6XE

Bad at Telling Hunger

Another very common autistic trait is not being able to tell when they are hungry, thirsty, etc. I can only find two examples of TK with showing this trait and that is in season 3 episode 13. TK says “I think I’m going to skip dinner tonight. I’m not really hungry.” Carlos responds with, “You always say that and end up eating at 2 am.” Based off of Carlos comment this has happened multiple times. Another example is in this same episode more towards the beginning. Carlos asks TK if he wants to change before they ate and TK responds with the fact that he already ate, leading Carlos to say he can’t survive on donuts alone. In this case TK had actually already eaten. But it is also implied that this has also happened before.

Bad At Metaphors/Subtext

I can think of at least 2 examples for this one. The they are both in season 3 episode 17. The first one is once again related to catan. When Nancy says that her and Mateo are both over it. It’s pretty obvious that she is speaking of something other than Catan. I know he didn’t know they were together but she was implying something with the way she said it. TK wasn’t picking up on that at all. He was just confused as to why she wouldn’t want to play Catan. The second example is later in the episode when Nancy and Mateo say they are going to get coffee. Everyone in the room is confused but you can tell they are talking about something else and are going to let them leave. TK on the other hand says they have coffee there. Not even thinking about the fact that they might be talking about something else.

Literally His whole conversation with Iris

Honestly I have no way to describe this but TKs who conversation with Iris in season 4 episode 2. When he goes to talk to her at her job. The whole thing is just I don’t know how to describe it. I can’t find a clip but the conversation is just two neurodivergents talking to each other except both of them are confused.

Going Non verbal

I have no actual confirmation that he goes non verbal but I do have a couple of examples that could be taken that way. The first on being how his mom says he shuts down. When the paramedic team gets kidnapped Carlos goes to Gwen and Owen’s house looking for him and she says something along the lines of “I knew we should watch him when he shuts down like this” Tk is usually pretty talkative but during a particularly stressful situation he is weirdly quiet. Such as in season 4 episode 9 when marjan is missing. Everyone else is asking questions and expressing their worries and he is just sitting there completely quiet. This happens multiple time throughout the series and I don’t feel like showing them all so you’ll just have to watch to figure it out, but trust me it happens.

I could probably have found more examples but I think this is more than enough information to prove my point. Anyway…

#911 on fox #911 lone star #autistic tk strand #headcannons #character analysis #tk strand #marjan marwani #owen strand #judd ryder #carlos reyes #i spent hours on this #for what #my sanity #I still can’t believe no one else has mentioned this #there is way too much evidence to ignore it #IM NEUROTYPICAL I SWEAR #my husband says I’m in denial

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