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aquilaofarkham · 3 years

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title: the little death rating: T+ word count: 2,409 summary: Two years after his fight with Death, Trevor’s injuries start catching up to him while Alucard realizes that humans are more fragile than he thought.

For @trevorsmellmont ❤️ Thank you so much for commissioning me!

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There’s a sharp pain pooling beneath his right arm, coursing through his ribcage. Trevor ignores it just as he’s ignored all the other aches, jabs, and stings over the past two years. Two years of building something better, something sustainable to last far longer than its young, admittedly green founders. Countless days, weeks, and months erecting homes, gardens, and pens for those dumb gentle animals who think the entire townscape is their personal pasture. Not another mistake of allowing them to wander aimlessly straight into the castle. As if heifers need to learn how to craft medicine or conduct what’s being referred to as “electricity”.

The work will never be finished. Even on days like this when the sun burns hotter than any circle in hell. A few drops of warm salt-ridden sweat crawl past Trevor’s pressed lips and into his dry mouth. Pain and thick heat were never enough to stop him before—he tells himself this, barely certain of his own supportive thoughts (a new concept taking root in his mind). Take it slow, don’t push yourself, idiot. This cabin made from the earth will get built eventually. Another family will receive their forever home to fill with lots of babies. Old wounds beg to differ as Trevor’s arms begin to weaken, each movement slower than the last, struggling to keep up with Greta’s superior pace. She’s always known her way around a mallet.

Another bead of sweat gets caught in Trevor’s lashes, sparing his eyes from temporary discomfort. Though it wouldn’t have mattered as they’re already past any sort of respite. He looks for distraction but can only see the blurred shapes coming from a huddle of bodies, despite being a short distance from them. He knows it’s only Sypha and Alucard with the village children, which gives Trevor some relief.

There’s more comfort to be felt when he remembers that one of those little monsters is his own, nestled in Sypha’s lap then placed in Alucard’s gentle arms. She has a name far too long for any toddler to pronounce—Elizabeta Belnades Tepes Belmont—so what rolls off her developing tongue instead is simply “Liza”. She’s innocent now but once she leaves this little man-made paradise and ventures into a harsher world, she will take more after her mother and father. Grabbing whatever life offers with both fists, clawing and biting her way through every obstacle until her teeth are reddened with bloody meat. For the time being, they relish Liza’s soft cheeks, wispy hair, and the way she throws herself at whichever adult happens to be in her nearest vicinity. The other children are helping her socialize by playing games and embracing frivolity; a tactic Trevor remembers from his own upbringing, though with less games and even less frivolity.

“Think you can handle one or two more?”

Greta’s voice manages to cut through Trevor’s mental fog. Funny how she asks if he can “think” about anything especially at this suffocating moment. She must have noticed the way his lips curl into a happy doped up grin while observing his family and couldn’t help but inquire. As any close, loved and valued friend would.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“What’s wrong with looking a bit further into the future? Now that we all have one.”

“Looking is one thing, but seriously suggesting is something else completely. My… performance in certain areas isn’t as up to snuff as it used to be.”

As Trevor says this, things deteriorate and get a bit fuzzier from his eyesight down to his chest. Out of focus. Painful. He keeps talking, keeps ignoring the inevitable. Always ignoring what his own body screams for.

Greta wrinkles her nose at his statement. “There are children present, Belmont.”

“What? I’m referring to the house. I barely managed to get one wall up while you’re already on the fucking roof.”

“So dramatic. You three really do deserve each other. And you’re still young.”

“On the outside, maybe.”

She laughs at his lie, misinterpreting it as another piece of mild self-deprecatory banter he might never be able to live without. Greta says something else, perhaps her own personal jest to counter his, but Trevor cannot hear. Breath grows heavier, forcing out a raspy “it’s fine. It’s just my chest”. Barely able to tell if Greta actually said anything about his sudden condition. Or rather, not so sudden. No, this has been building over quite some time now. His muscles and bones screaming, begging for relief or death, and end to everything—whichever comes first. Feelings that only worsened over the years.

Trevor loses control over his legs, now practically boneless. The collision between his head and the ground is nothing compared to the inner war over his heart. Whether it will finally succumb. Greta immediately calls for help—he thinks without confidence, once again. Trevor can still hear voices, but not their exact words. Not Sypha when she demands to know what happened. Not Alucard when he begs for him to stay conscious. Not even Liza as she cries for her papa.

Then all the chaos in the world fades into slow darkness.

Alucard stands outside the closed bedchamber door, contemplating how often he’s touched Trevor’s body. Lithe fingertips have memorized every crevice, scar, soft and rough spots alike. Not just as a lover with wandering hands underneath blankets in the dead of night. Or a friend who holds him steady on both feet when he needs it. But as this family’s self-appointed physician.

Perhaps the prince of two worlds took after his father after all. “Polymath” is what Alucard used to describe Dracula and the very same word others have referred to him as, mostly in the realm of medicine. He knows more than anyone, little offence given towards the herb dispensers and leech farmers (only to be polite for his own townsfolk). Thus, through the anxieties and trembling hands, Alucard gave Trevor his diagnosis: heat exhaustion along with a muscle somewhere in his chest that decided to go rogue and strain itself.

The son of Tepes, the only local doctor worth trusting, and arguably the co-leader of their little prospering hamlet paces across the hall like Trevor did the day Liza was born. He’s on the other side of that closed door, resting. Bedridden from heat exhaustion and a fucking pulled muscle. It bothers Alucard. This shouldn’t have happened to someone who stood up to the personification of Death and pissed in his eye. A stupidly common and easily treatable inconvenience to the human body shouldn’t be the end of a fucking Belmont.

It shouldn’t—unless Trevor’s scars have anything to say about it. The ones on the inside and outside. Inside, unseen, and untreatable. There’s a harsh revelation to be found there; one which the prince has been purposefully avoiding up to this moment. Alucard can try as he wants, use the tools left behind by his father and mother as though it were their final death wish, but he might never tend to what pains Trevor on the inside. He’s a Belmont, undeniably so, but Belmonts are human despite the many recurring signs pointing to the contrary. Then there’s Sypha with her magic, but she’s human as well. Greta and Liza are still human. Humans are more susceptible to dying easy, little deaths even when they follow world-saving victories.

Where does this leave Alucard? Thoughts spiral down, down towards darker places the longer he nervously hovers outside the bedroom. He’s been known to awkwardly stumble into deflection, insisting he’s only half human whenever certain someones bring up this topic of necessary conversation. Meaning he might as well not be human at all. Not when the bodies of those he loves change so rapidly while his remains petrified. It’s only been two years, filled to the brim with countless hours he wouldn’t ever want to trade for the entire world. But the thought of one night as they nestle themselves into bed and Alucard touches either Trevor or Sypha’s chest only to feel an anomaly within their hearts. The earliest sign that time and age will eventually betray them as it does for all mortals—it could be the one thing to break him.

Alucard stops himself at the opportune moment, right before he starts thinking about his mother and father. Did Dracula ever contemplate Lisa’s mortality? Was the decision to never turn her easy or the hardest thing he forced upon his unstable, immortal conscience? Arms crossed over his chest like a protective cage, fingernails digging into the fabric of his shirt until it hurts, Alucard swallows a bitter glob of spit and reaches for the doorknob. Sypha will have to accept the fact that he couldn’t wait for her. He quietly thanks her for the lessons she taught him. If he needs to talk about something—truly talk, no sarcastic wit or banter, just the raw emotions—Alucard no longer hesitates. He won’t, not as he enters the room and immediately sees Trevor still in bed, not quite altogether there. At least he can manage a decent smile and wave of his hand.

“Evening.”

“How does your chest feel?”

“Still a bit tight, but I’ve been taking deep breaths like the doctor ordered.”

The amount of strain heard in Trevor’s voice worries Alucard. Hopefully the Belmont has learned something from the recent past, so he won’t be stupid and suggest anything having to do with leaving bed or getting back to work.

“I think I should get up.”

“I think that’s a poor decision.”

“Are you saying that as my physician or because you’re letting that pretty little blonde head of yours get too worked up?”

No. Yes. Both? If only Trevor didn’t look up at him with those glassy eyes (can he still see him?) the colour of stained glass windows erected in cathedrals he felt so unwelcome inside. If only that smile, somehow both soft and shit-eating, wasn’t in place of a more serious expression. Then maybe Alucard could voice his concerns without being accused of acting overbearing—an accusation grounded in solid evidence but he’s not ready to admit that yet. Not out loud.

“Normal, healthy adults do not become bedridden after pulling a small muscle in their chest.”

“Belmonts aren’t normal… or healthy in my case.”

Alucard’s brow furrows. “I want to think you’re healthy—” I need to. “—that you’ll live long enough to see the children of this village have little ones of their own. Liza included.”

“God’s sake, she’s only two years old. You and Greta, always talking about looking one step too far into the future. Let her be a child before adulthood rears its ugly maw.”

“Try not to change the subject.”

Trevor lifts his head off the indent pressed into his sweat drenched pillow. “Alright. Fine. I feel much better. I won’t push myself and give my heart some more time to recover.”

No response coupled with broken eye contact; sure signs of Alucard’s reluctance to accept his rather weak assurance. The Belmont has no other choice.

“Come here. Sit.”

Another moment’s hesitation before Alucard complies. Feeling his weight upon the mattress, Trevor blindly reaches for his wrist until calloused fingers grip cool, unblemished skin.

“Now lie down. No, no. Not like that. Place your head right here.” He pats his chest and with a fleeting amount of guidance, Alucard’s cheek fits perfectly between his breasts. Two hands smooth over the dhampir’s curves before one before one rests on his silk smooth head and the other against the small of his back. Alucard lied about one thing: his own body can change in small yet noticeable ways. Without the need to fight for the lives of others, whether today or tomorrow, sharp edges turn softer. Trevor and Sypha have finally let themselves breathe as well, let go, and enjoy all of life’s pleasures.

“Hear that?” He asks Alucard.

“... It’s slow.”

“Slow and strong like it should be.”

Alucard wishes he could bottle up that heartbeat or place it in a box. Preferably a music box to listen to its soothing melody long after its original body and soul are both eventually gone from this world. Who knows? It might make things hurt a little bit less like when he redrew his parent’s portrait or built a much larger nursery where his own used to be. Not a lot, but Alucard could possibly live with just “a little”.

“Speaking of Greta…” The baritone of Trevor’s voice sends deep vibrations through his broad chest, tickling Alucard’s cheek. “She said something about more children.”

“More orphans joining us?”

“No, even though I know how much you love those damn orphans. She asked if we could handle one or two more.”

“What did you say?”

“I implied that she was taking after Sypha’s influence by being wonderfully insane.”

Alucard chuckles in agreement. That sounds like Greta. “You never know. It might be good for Liza if she has a younger sibling.”

With the sound of Sypha’s well timed arrival, he’s mercifully saved from Trevor’s lengthy speech about how patience is apparently a virtue and tirades about his “performance” or lack thereof. Greta reveals herself shortly afterwards with a still crying Liza in tow. So many bodies gathered around one inebriated individual, here for him and him alone. Trevor’s consoled yet exasperated expression directed at Greta in particular says “isn’t there someone more important you could be helping right now?”

Sypha is the first to voice her gratitude after fussing over her exhausting loved one. “I will never be able to thank you enough, Alucard.”

“I think the bed did most of the heavy lifting, love.”

Trevor is given an affectionate, somewhat caring glare in response but his focus is demanded elsewhere once he suddenly notices Liza jumping onto the bed. She snuggles herself between him and Alucard, wetting their shirts with her tears.

“Easy there, you little monster. Papa’s still a bit tender.” Not that she can understand or care.

There’s an aura of relief felt amongst everyone in the room—less with Alucard who smiles bittersweetly. It’s a truth he knew he had to acknowledge before it tore his heart open. Trevor and Sypha will die one day and he will have to bury them. He’ll bury Greta, he might even bury Liza. Not today thank all the gods, or tomorrow, not for the next few decades if fate is kind enough.

But the day will come. And it will be Alucard’s own little death.

#castlevania #castlevania spoilers #castlevania fanfiction #trevor belmont #alucard #alucard castlevania #sypha belnades #greta danesti #trephacard #trevorcard #my writing #*cvfic

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nomadmilk · 5 years

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Why the God Isn’t Bored on Midgard - Loki x F!Reader Drabble - 5

Summary: With Ragnarok decimating Asgard, Thor and Loki and their people return to Earth searching for refuge. Everyone else has seemed to settle, except for Loki - the God of Mischief and Chaos - who isn’t willing to live the domesticated Midgard life, and getting utterly bored out of his mind... Until he discovered you.

Word Count: 2.2K

Warnings: Rated M/18+. Sexual tension, maybe? But there IS sexual content. Loki being a little dominating...

Author’s Note: I hope this one is okay ^-^ I’ve been working ridiculous shifts since the beginning of September, and I’m super tired (I’m sorry!) but I wanted to get this part done... I should get a better detailed summary now that it’s turning into some kind of series, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it... ERM, enjoy! Hope you like it ^-^

Here are the other parts to the series: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 (First Half) Part 8.5 (Second Half) Part 9

Lying in bed, you hold the remote in your hand, blinking slowly. Your breathing was content, concentrated, and slow. You could hear the rumble from the sheets, and you felt conscious if anyone heard them too. Loki was merely on the other side of the door but, by the sound of his footsteps fading away, he hadn’t heard a thing.

You had been testing out the sex toys your new job had given you and had easily found a favorite you couldn’t stop using. The vibrations felt stunning, it tended to the right spot, and the orgasms were incredible every time. It was definitely the product you were going to up sell when working at the store.

Unbeknownst to you, the God of Chaos knew exactly what you were doing. It took him a while to figure it out why you had been spending an awful amount of time in your room recently. But after a while, and when you began to be careless of his presence again, the sound of your gasps caught in his ears and he fit the pieces together.

But he was agitated. A little unfocused over things, knowing what you were doing. He’d go to work, teach his lecture, be slightly irritated by the stupidity of some of his students, then leave to his office on campus. His head would be down onto some papers, and he’d take his break with reading something for leisure, but the thought of you would cross his mind.

“Brother?” Thor let himself into his office.

“How-“ Loki shook his head. “What do you want?”

“I have something to tell you that I thought would be of interest-”

“Can’t you tell I’m busy?”

“You’re not.” Thor points to the book in his hand, curious. “That’s a book you’ve been reading since the last time I saw you… Shouldn’t you be finished with that by now? You’re the fastest reader I know.”

“Probably the only medal I’d ever win between the two of us.”

“That’s odd.” Thor sits in front of him. “Don’t think I’d ever hear that statement.”

“What do you mean?”

Thor folds his arms. “You honestly saying something humble, yet in pity. What’s bothering you?”

There’s a pause; Loki was almost shocked at Thor’s interpretation of himself. Most of the time the limelight was on the God of Thunder but, after significant events, recently Loki had been acknowledged as his retrospective equal. But Thor has never been one to exactly pinpoint and regard Loki’s emotions.

Thor raised an eyebrow. “Have you even tried being nice to her?”

“Who?” Loki asks, almost abrasive.

“Maybe it would be a nice surprise if-“

“What did you want to tell me in the first place? Was it about Valkyrie?”

“Oh! Yes!” Thor clapped his hands together. “It was very funny, you see, there was this tree..”

As Loki continued to mildly listen to Thor’s story, he breathed a sigh of relief to himself about the topic change.

Although, maybe he should have chosen a topic he could have actually paid attention to, as his thoughts ran into you again.

The conversation in the home office, and the confrontation in your bedroom, had somewhat changed your attitude towards him. You were able to tolerate his presence more, and you were able to hold eye contact with him without turning beetroot red, which Loki couldn’t admit to himself that he missed… However, now that awkward silences were out of the way, Loki could really see your untamed side, and all its rough edges.

Your burst of confidence to fight back was refreshing, almost invigorating. When you pivot away from him, he loves the way you leave. Sometimes he can see a familiar bright twinkle in your smile…

Loki didn’t understand his reactions, in all honesty. He knew he felt different.

However, both of your lives continued outside the apartment walls and, whilst you were out on your new job, Loki had been burying himself in his work, prepping for an important lecture coming soon. The home office had extended to the living room for the day as Loki had summoned his old battle armor on a mannequin. The students needed to have some visual stimulus, and what other way to aid that than his own genuine piece of armor. Well, they didn’t need to know that the suit was real, but Loki figured it would do the job.

He even called Thor to see if he could borrow his, and hopefully this would be enough to get the students memorizing a few things on ancient history. And, after being skeptic about his brother’s request on the phone, Thor decided to visit his brother donning his battle suit.

“You idiot.” Loki massages his forehead. “I said to just take the armor with you, not wear it. You must have looked like a lunatic.”

Thor shrugs. “No, not really. The humans seemed to recognize me a lot faster.”

Loki rolls his eyes. “You don’t have a spare change of clothes either?”

“Why would I need that?”

The Prince let out an exasperated sigh.

Thor walked over to a cupboard, easily locating his personal box of PopTarts, and began munching on one. “Hmm… So, what is all this?”

As the mannequin of Loki’s armor stood in the middle of the room, the dining table was covered with open books and a few papers, some written by historians and some mythologists, splayed out across the surface and sitting on chairs. Thor saunters over to scan over the novels, picking one up and skim reading it; all the books were open to Midgard’s take on ancient Norse tales.

Thor raises an eyebrow to his brother. “Some of this is wrong.”

“I know.” Loki folds his arms.

Placing the book down, Thor points his PopTart at him. “But you’re feeling content, aren’t you? You seem very invested in this.“

“If you’re suspicious in me meddling with mortal minds again-“

“Oh, Loki,” Thor laughs, a beam on his lips, “It’s been a while since I’ve heard you do anything troublesome, so something must be keeping you occupied. But I don’t think it’s this Midgard work at all.”

The God of Mischief glowers. “What do you want now?”

“To invite you.” Thor says, his mouth opening up to his fifth PopTart. “Stark has another party happening in his tower. He would like for you to come.”

Loki only needed a second of recollection Stark drunk. And he didn’t need another experience of that. “No.”

Thor wasn’t surprised by his answer. Although before he could speak and reason with his brother, the sound of the front door causes them to turn around.

You stumble a little as you see the two of them, and then frown at the state of papers and books everywhere. “Hello?”

Thor greets you first. “Are you in the mood for some festivities?”

“Uh.” You blink. “What kind of festivities?”

As Thor explains the details, Loki watches. He places his hands in his pockets, noticing your face and the way it scrunches in your usual confused expression. He’s not really listening to Thor’s persuasion, as it was quite endearing to watch your façade change into an ever-growing beam.

Soon enough, you departed the room with a hug from Thor, not batting an eye to Loki.

Thor grinned at Loki triumphantly; Loki glared at him from across the room.

“I know what you’re trying to do.” Loki catches his brother halfway through the door.

Thor looks Loki up then down, stopping in the midst of shutting the front door. “Do you?”

With Thor disappearing, Loki closes his eyes for one last sigh.

As the first few minutes began to pass into the evening, Loki could see you panicking a little. The clock ticked by, you were popping in and out of the bathroom with a change of hairstyle every time. As the sun began to set, you had settled on your hair but was now trying on every dress that Loki had not seen you wear before; floral dresses, red dresses, black dresses that had trousers instead of skirts…

It was less than ten minutes till Thor’s arrival. Loki left his bedroom, pulling on a blazer and completing his ensemble; he thought it best to go with his black and white suit. The state of the living room reverted back to normal as he used his Siedr to clean all of the essays and anthologies back into his office. However, he had left his battle armour still in its place in the centre of the room.

He liked having it there.

You hadn’t said a word to each other since you got back home; Loki had thought it impossible to speak to you or make any remarks.

Which was odd because it wasn’t like him to not make any.

You step into the living room from the hallway in a dress that catches his eye; a velvet, deep green dress. It was simple yet stunning, and beautifully accentuated you. Your eyes seemed to flutter, and every step you took made him stare longer.

You fumble with some high-heel shoes that are in the living room, crouching down and checking them all and muttering disapproval to all of them. With your back towards him, you still don’t seem to address his existence, but he still couldn’t stop staring at you, especially when you bend over and your dress exquisitely carved-

“Can’t find anything in this..” He hears you mutter angrily.

At an observed inspection, he sees the zip of the dress on your spine not done up properly. “Y/N, your zip.”

You don’t even hesitate as you stop your mumbles and straighten, failing to feel the zip on your spine. “What?“

The sounding clips of his shoes stilled you as his body approached behind yours. He places his palm on your spine, steadying you, slightly fascinated about how his palms almost covered the smallness of your back. His hand brushes slightly, a cover only to feel the fabric against you and to feel the curves your body naturally forms.

The zip closes up to the top, and Loki could feel his sense of control loosen. He hears you say a minor thank you for his help but, as you turn his face was close to yours, it passes by him. Your perfume had an alluring scent, your eyes were dewy and sparkling, and Loki had never been so enticed with anyone’s lips until it fell on yours.

“You don’t seem like yourself.” You say, your voice slightly cracks. He finds it adorable.

“You don’t seem like yourself either.” He replies, a tenure lower than usual, he observes.

He sees you gulp. “Nerves. I guess.”

You look up at him with your cheeks rouge to a pink tone. You speak of nerves, but all Loki saw was pure beauty.

“You’re gonna’ wear that?” You question. “Don’t you usually wear some kind of waistcoat, or tie, with your suits?”

Loki almost laughed; how odd of you to mention. He didn’t even think you noticed the way he appeared that much.

He breathes. “Thought it would be good for a change.”

He steps forward, your back hits the wall and his lips meet yours.

Kissing you was like drinking the first fruits of Asgardian wine, and Loki was getting drunk and delirious with it. Tasting you was dangerously addictive, and the sighs you elicited made his primal urges clearer. Loki had doubts in his move. However, when he felt your arms pull him further into you, all of it had eradicated instantly.

He props you up against the wall, separating from your lips for a moment to get a grip of your thighs. His hands brush higher. He feels the rough yet smooth netting of your stockings, your legs opening to him, as he shoves the skirt of your dress up so that it doesn’t restrict him from getting his hips closer to yours. The sounds of your winces were sent to the growing erection in his trousers and-

“Loki…” -By the gods, he wanted to hear more of you.

Loki never predicted how good this would feel, how good you could feel against him. He grunts at the softness of your skin. Your lips were wet and supple, and he could feel your luscious moans escape between kisses. They were turning almost sore from the amount of biting and licking Loki had been doing. But he couldn’t help it.

With his body feeling warm and his mind explicit, he grips you tighter and tighter, possessive over your body and every sensation you could give him, your core radiating an amorous heat he couldn’t help but press himself against.

He needed you, to be buried inside you, to feel those tight walls ache and cum around his-

“Lady Y/N!” Thor knocks on the front door, calling out to you. “Are you ready?”

You both stop, eyes meeting in stunned silence, and chests rising and falling rapidly.

Although his breathing was rattled, Loki’s eyes were steel. “If you answer my brother… I will make you regret it.”

#Loki #Loki Laufeyson #loki fanfic #loki (marvel)#loki odinson #loki x reader #loki x you #tom hiddleston #MCU #apartment #roommates #suit loki #dress kink #Thor Odinson #🐄🗂TheNomaArchives

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mysticmelove · 5 years

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I’ve been really into Greek Mythology recently and I was wonder if you could write an AU: Hades x Persephone but with Jumin and MC?

* I’ve actually been reading Lore Olympus recently so I’ve taken inspiration from that (credits to Rachel @/used_bandaid for the inspiration and amazing work)- as well as Hadestown and my other knowledge. Also I really enjoyed writing this so if you want me to continue it please let me know xx

King of the underworld

(Jumin x MC) [AU]

Such a sight had never graced his pedantic eyes. There she stood, almost a beacon of light, within his dark abyss of a realm; her fingers barely gracing the withered branches of the trees lining the Styx. She was shining against his darkness and it was so evidently clear that she didn’t belong, yet her comfort in the situation seemed to suggest otherwise. The underworld was no place for someone such as herself; she was beautiful, her actions caring and loving, and she was definitely alive. He could only wonder how she’d even made it past the gate, but still there was no fear as he approached her silently.

Her subdued eyes wandered to him, her hands retreating slowly from the branches and clasping subtly against her chest. Those bright eyes were guiding him towards her, surely, because once his feet began to move he couldn’t stop himself. He came to, freezing a dozen metres or so away from her, and his voice bellowed across the deathly meadow: “You are not of this place,” he declared, “Who is this creature that has sunk into the underworld?”

She smiled as she greeted him, bowing slightly in his presence as he drew closer, “My name is MC.”

Her voice was as pleasing to his ears as her figure was to his eyes- completely and utterly stunning. He fiddled with his cuff links, distracting himself from the sight his eyes were so eager to draw in, and the corner of his lips cocked up ever so slightly. “I’ve never heard of such a name,” his smirk grew as he looked down at her, her beauty was mesmerising but it could not hold a candle to the willpower of a God- a God with a job to collect souls, as of now it was her’s. “How does a pretty little thing, such as yourself, find your way down here?”

“The gods call me Persephone,” she stated, her fingers moving slowly to fiddle with the hair flowing past her shoulders. “The mortal realm gets boring… beautiful but still boring once my job is done. I felt like taking a break.” Her tone was so matter of fact, yet it held that sweet sound all her prior words had done.

He was taken aback slightly; that name he had heard of. Persephone. Goddess of vegetation and daughter of Demeter. The underworld was definitely no place for her. “I don’t think you should have wandered down here,” he explained, his tone thick and harsh.

“What’s your name?” MC interjected, skipping as she took steps closer to him.

He was left dumbfounded at the sight, rarely could anyone, the gods themselves, so blatantly ignore his words. A sardonic laugh left him as he admired her ignorance: “Hades. King of this here underworld you stand in,” he paused, admiring her shocked little face, “But, since you so kindly introduced me with two names, a few people take it upon themselves to call me Jumin.”

“How does the king of the underworld end up having a nickname like that?” MC laughed quietly, the lighting up of her face almost childlike. Jumin found her actions almost adorable to watch- she’d be the sickliest of foods.

He dismissed her, walking down the river and ushering her to follow. “I doubt your mother wants you down here, Persephone,” he announced, his eyes shifting down ever so slightly to watch the goddess at his side.

“She doesn’t like anything,” MC sighed, her fists balling in the material of her cloak, “and in her eyes I’m no more than a child.”

Jumin nodded silently, Demeter was always the type to be so overprotective of everything she had. “But, Persephone—”

“MC,” her voice rose above his, “Please call me, MC.”

“Alright… MC…” Jumin began but his voice felt uncomfortable in even his own ears, the thought of calling a goddess by such a common name was obscene. “But surely you are needed in the mortal realm? They require you for vegetation, flowers, fertility, and what so have you.”

A blush was quick to spread her face; goddess of fertility she was but she always felt embarrassed by the idea, not to mention a man such as himself had been the one to bring it up. “My… My mother can do all of that without me.” Jumin was quick to notice her hesitance and the lovely shades of pink and red that had spread across her cheeks when he spoke of her aforementioned roles, he couldn’t help but smile at her reaction. “This place though,” MC was quick to change the topic as she watched the river run alongside them, “I could do a lot of work here.”

Her comment was so completely ridiculous that he couldn’t help but laugh, stopping in his tracks to face her. “My underworld? You want to paint it with your pretty little flowers?” he scoffed.

Persephone averted her gave, not wanting to show the shame in her eyes. Truth be told, having found out who he was, she wanted to impress him; he was diligent, respectable, not dismissive of her like the other gods often were... She didn’t want him to view her as some kid who had just wandered off and needed returning. “Yeah... Everything looks just as dark and gloomy as how people describe you. Though, I will admit, you seem a lot nicer in person.”

“Oh, really?” He returned her smile with a smug grin. “That’s not the best thing for the God of death. It’s best I keep up the whole ‘gloomy’ image.”

“I like whatever image this is,” she replied cheerfully. Jumin hummed in response, only to begin to continue their walk. MC hollered: “Wait a sec.”

Jumin turned on his heels, sighing at the interruption. His arms folded over his chest as he turned to face the goddess, whose hands were now placed firmly in front of her with her palms up. He watched in amazement as a wreath of flowers appeared in her small hands.

“Here,” she beamed, holding out her hands to him. “I even left the thorns on the roses for you.”

“Thank you... But what is it?”

“Well, a king needs a crown... so I made you a flower crown,” she explained. “May I crown you, Hades?”

Jumin chuckled, looking at the ring of flowers once more. “They are beautiful and I appreciate your attention to detail...” He sighed once more as he got down on one knee, giving her access to the top of his head, “If you wish to crown me, MC, be my guest.”

She placed it down gently, taking care as to not scrape him with the thorns. He looked up to her, an eyebrow raised; his face basically asking what it looked like without the need for words. “You look amazing! Not so ‘gloomy’ but a good king nonetheless.”

“I’ll take your word for it,” he humoured, returning to his feet. “Come on, let’s continue our walk. I’d like to know more about how you got here.”

“O- Okay.” MC followed without a second to question where they were even walking to, she was just enjoying their pleasant conversation.

Jumin, too, really didn’t know where they were walking at this point, maybe they were just enjoying the view or taking a stroll, but he was fond of it despite this. MC was fun to be around and he presence was much more relaxing than anyone else’s was; she herself was relaxed around him, unlike most who would fear to say even a syllable wrong. He loved her little giggles whenever the tiniest thing amused her and he loved the way she took interest in the smallest details. Honest to Hestia, he didn’t feel so comfortable around anyone the way he did just walking with Persephone- it was new and reliving.

They’d stopped on the outskirts of some meadow MC had taken a particularly liking to and Jumin had reluctantly let her plant some flowers to ‘brighten up the place’- as she put it. She was kneeling peacefully in the grass, tending to some of the more delicate plants, when Jumin came out with it. “If you like it here you could always stay for awhile, if you want.”

Her head craned up immediately, her eyes wide and bright. “Really, Hades?” He nodded silently, his lips turning up as he watched more flowers sprout up around her effortlessly. “I’d love to! Thank you so much!”

#mystic messenger #mysme #jumin x mc #jumin han #mystic messenger jumin han #mysme jumin #mc mystic messenger #mc myseme #mystic messenger drabble #mysme drabble #mystic messenger headcanon #au #hades x persephone #hades x persephone au

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rpsquad · 4 years

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116, 212- “I don’t think I like your tone”, “That’s an order. Obey.” - Christopher + Blake

Christopher messaged at his temples in frustration. This book, despite being the newest he owned, was clearly factually inaccurate down to its very principals. The assumptions the author made from the start completely missed the mark on how the fundamentals of the universe functioned. He snapped the book close and tossed it into the growing pile of idiotic books that didn’t belong in his library. The pile wobbled in retribution, threatening to fall over. It was getting quite large, Christopher thought with a frown, and the library was becoming quite thin. Perhaps it was time to go looking for some additions.

Then the bell clanged, echoing through the empty halls. No rest for the wicked, it seemed.

Christopher sat in the middle of his web, always watching, always listening. When, finally, his efforts captured something, he made sure his chances couldn’t get away.

The spider, oblivious to Christopher, continued weaving its web between Blake’s door and the wall. Christopher watched it for a moment more before shooing it away and knocking on Blake’s door.

Within a moment or two, the door opened, and Blake stared blankly at Christopher. He held the door open, though not enough to give off any sense of hospitality or to allow Christopher to see what lay beyond it. “What is it?” he asked coldly.

Christopher bit his lip “I was wondering if you would mind if I ran an errand in a few days time. Most it will take is the afternoon, and not even that if all goes as expected.” Christopher shifted his weight from one side and back again, awaiting Blake’s response.

In one motion, Blake exited his room fully and shut the door behind him, expecting Christopher to move as he did so. “And for what reason should I permit you to leave?” His gaze remained blank, yet there was now a fair bit of annoyance in his voice.

Christopher’s hand began to pick at his robe “Well, you see, I’m looking to grow my book collection. I’m searching in particular for scientific texts, as I’m sorely lacking in that field. Recently there was a journal published which seems to have quite a lot of promise, the community has become quite besotted with it. I would like to procure a copy for myself.” he took a shallow breath in, trying to calm his erratic, if unnecessary, heartbeat “In all honestly, I only need to go to the publishing store, buy a copy, and come back here. Shouldn’t be a trouble at all.”

Blake stared at him as he explained, before letting out a deep sigh. “And if one of your clients arrives to deliver payment? Should I set up a waiting room? ‘Terribly sorry, your judge is out for lunch recovering some journal.’” He mocked before his gaze turned ice cold once again. “Would you care to remind me why I made you a member of the Shadow Court? I’m afraid that when you make ridiculous requests such as that, I tend to forget.”

Christopher’s jaw clenched as the verbal blow struck him across the face. He glared at Blake “Yes, because all of my clients will show up on our doorstep in the same hour I’d be away. And Avo forbid I show any sort of interest in anything other than being the first, experimental member of your dark court. I refuse to apologize for having something to do with my life other than wait for that cursed bell to ring.”

“I don’t think I like your tone.” He remarked, eyes narrowing before he looked away from Christopher. “To be perfectly honest with you, I am disappointed. You seemed so eager to become greater than the insignificant ant that you were, and yet here you are, wanting to indulge in mere mortal hobbies. If that’s all you’ve wanted all this time, then perhaps you should have put more effort into not being drowned at the bottom of a river, hm?” His tone bordered on amusement once again. “Oh well, it’s not as though you really are much greater than what you started out as. At the end of the day, you really are just another mortal that has a deal with me. And this,” He gestured around him. “Is your price.” He locked eyes with him once again. “Do your job. That’s an order. Obey.” And with that, Blake re-entered his room, not caring for whatever else Christopher had to say.

Christopher felt his eyes sting and his spine shiver even as he walked down the hall to his own room. His hand locked into fists without his say, and his breathing felt more laboured than it had any right to. All he wanted to do was go back and show Blake exactly who he was calling ‘just another mortal’, and yet he knew he could never even come close to matching Blake in any fight. He knew there would never be a way out of this.

The door to his room shut behind him and Christopher slumped against it before finally letting the sobs he’d been holding in his chest free. His vision faded from his mind’s eye as he landed on the ground, his knees buckling. His heart raced in his chest and his lungs heaved.

Christopher’s eyes let loose the river they had held back, and he drowned once more.

Days passed, the sun rose and set, and the world continued to spin. Christopher learned how to keep his chin up and his mouth shut about what he wanted. The world changed in every way around the two beings of darkness and didn’t change at all. Blake never changed.

Until he did.

Christopher watched this new, softer Blake closely. Blake had interests now. Blake was trying to make friends with a human. Blake was going insane, clearly. His many years must have caught up to him. There was no other explanation for the kind look in his eyes when Ivine visited, or the more relaxed manner he showed, and especially not the seeming interest in what Christopher was doing.

That was perhaps what concerned Christopher the most. The kindness towards Ivine could be explained as wanting a lay with her, the relaxed and content manner could be faked. But there would be no reason to fake interest when Christopher was already totally clearly under Blake’s control. And it was never to try and trick Christoper into admitting something he shouldn’t have even. Simply plain, casual interest in a hobby of another.

Christopher wondered if whatever illness Blake had fallen under could catch. He seemed to have a strange feeling in his chest, and his own steps seemed just a little less burdened.

Or maybe that was just hope.

Then came the knock at his door, rousing Christopher from his most recent attempt at reading the human race’s achievements in science. He sat up slightly and put a bookmark in his book as he called “Come in”

The door opened, and Blake stood there. “Hello Christopher,” he greeted. “I was hoping that I could speak with you for a moment.” His gaze landed on the book Christopher had been reading. “Though if you are the middle of something, the matter can wait. It is not of much importance.” His voice bordered on… apologetic.

Christopher looked down at the book and then back up at Blake “No, I.. I wasn’t doing anything much. I’ve already read it anyway.” Christopher gestured to a chair across the table “Have a seat?”

“Very well.” Blake pulled the chair out before sitting down. “I was hoping that I could hear some literature recommendations from you. I have found that I have more spare time on my hands than I realized, and I would like to have something to work on.” He looked around at the number of bookshelves. “And I imagine you are far more knowledgeable on the subject of mortal writings than I.” His gaze returned to Christopher. “I’m not terribly picky. I am certain that I will enjoy whatever you recommend.”

Christopher’s mouth fell open for a moment before he remembered himself. He cleared his throat “Well, there are still many things to consider. Do you prefer nonfiction or fiction, to start? And then there’s the matter of topic, and if you’re already well-read enough to understand the assumptions the author is making.” Christopher paused “Not that I’m assuming you’re not knowledgeable in the written word of course, but I’ve never seen you seem particularly interested in mortal writings however, well, there isn’t anything particularly recent in my collection anyway, so you shouldn’t notice so much…” he looked helplessly at a bookshelf, having no idea where to begin.

Blake appeared to think for a moment before responding. “Why don’t you simply recommend some of your favorite texts? Least favorites would be acceptable as well. You do not have anyone to discuss what you read with, correct? If that sounds like something you would like to attempt, then I would be happy to discuss any number of works with you.” A hint of a smile appeared on Blake’s face. “Perhaps when Ivine achieves the level of literacy required for the task, she could join us.” He blinked. “If that is fine with you, of course.”

Christopher nodded in response, still looking like a balverine had appeared in his room. He got up quickly and went to the bookshelf. Christopher started picking books off the shelves and setting them down on the table “You can try these first I suppose. They’re a few of my personal favorites.” Christopher looked around at his library and frowned, then looked at Blake consideringly “You know, this collection isn’t as big as it seems. I’ve read every book in this room at least three times over, and with some I border on nearly a hundred re-reads. What I’m saying is, you’ll most likely find that you’ll read through every book in here very quickly. There is a list of books I’ve had my eye on for the last centuries of course, but to would have to, well..” He paused, his hand picking nervously at the sleeve of his robe. He could remember all too well the last time he asked this question “I would need to leave the court for a few hours at a time, not all at once of course, perhaps once a month or so. If you’d allow me, that is.” Christopher’s jaw clenched shut, regretting the decision to ask this already and awaiting the rejection.

Blake stared at Christopher a moment before something appeared to dawn on him. He stood up and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder gently. “Chirstopher,” he began “Do what you please, so long as it brings you happiness. If one of your clients delivers payment, I’ll handle it. You gave your life in the pursuit of knowledge, and so it would only be cruel of me to keep you from it.” Blake smiled at Christopher. “You are so much greater than you realize, and I am very glad to have you here. I am proud of you, Christopher,” he averted his gaze. “And I am ashamed of myself for having made you so nervous to ask to leave for only a few hours only once a month. You could leave for a month and I would be perfectly happy to stand by, so long as you exercised caution. And I suppose that much is merely a request. Alright?” He looked to him once again, smiling hesitantly.

Christopher blinked hard, trying to keep the tears threatening to fall at bay. He quickly turned away from Blake and went back to the bookshelf. His mind had screeched to a halt at Blake’s words, and he couldn’t seem to get the train to move again. Christoper Reached up, pretending to read the spine of one of the books “Right,” he finally choked out, “I- I appreciate the sentiment Blake, but-” he voice began to wobble and he cleared his throat before continuing “But really, there’s no need to go so far.” he paused, biting his lip as he did. Christopher knew he couldn’t hold back for much longer “Well, I hope you enjoy my suggestions,” he tried to subtly wipe away any wetness in his eyes with his hand “But I need to start making an inventory so I can determine what I’ll be starting with.” Christopher turned back to Blake “And it’s really quite a boring task, I know you’ll find much more enjoyment in doing something else. So I’ll talk with you later, hm?”

Blake blinked at Christopher but ultimately nodded. “Very well, Christopher. If you wish for me to leave you be, then I shall. Though I would prefer if you knew that very few tasks bring me more enjoyment than ensuring that you are well.” Blake stepped forward and embraced Christopher briefly before moving away and picking up the books on the table. “I’ll speak with you later, then.” He smiled once again before leaving Christopher’s room.

Christopher had turned to stone at the hug, and that stone crumbled after Blake’s footsteps had disappeared down the hall. Christopher collapsed against the bookshelf and slid down to his knees. He felt so confused and his heart was beating desperately in his chest and he could still feel where Blake’s arm had wrapped around Christopher. His shaking hands rose to cover the burning imprints as best as they could and pressed down, like he could erase the feeling of what had happened.

His mind raced, turning over what had happened over and over, again and again. Christopher couldn’t make sense of why Blake’s kindness had been turned towards himself with such ferocity. Why would Blake choose now to act kindly towards Christopher when they had gotten along just fine in the last few centuries? Why would a being seemingly older than time decide to change now? Why would he change his opinion over everything human and mortal so much? Why..?

Why did it matter so much? Christopher pressed his hands to his eyes as the tears fell. Why did it matter so much to Christopher what Blake did? Why did Christopher’s back still feel warm where Blake had touched him, why did his hands shake and his eyes shed tears over the clear acceptance in Blake’s voice, why could he not process and understand this, why, Why, WHY…?

Why did it feel like the world had crumbled around him and yet like the sun had settled the deepest warmth into his bones?

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imissthefire · 5 years

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General Winter Headcanons

Okay, so I never thought I would write anything about this character, but damn. I got sent two anons (one of which I accidentally deleted before answering it, the other I’ve been keeping in my inbox so that I’m constantly reminded that I need to write this) and they asked for some backstory on him and what his life is like. I just gotta say, huge thank you to whoever sent those because I went ham on these. I also will have probably at least one other set of HCs for him coming out in the next week or so (I didn’t want to post all of it at once because it was way too long for my liking, and it also kinda felt better to make them two seperate sections)

A quick thing I wanted to mention before we get into this, since we don’t know what his true faerie name is, I just refer to him as Winter throughout this just so that it’s easier to follow along rather than making one up. Okay, now without further ado, here we are with General Winter’s backstory and where it all began.

· He grew up in the earlier days of King Arawn’s rule

· King Brahm had just passed on the throne to Arawn when Winter was fairly young

· Winter wasn’t always pledged to the Unseelie courts

· In fact, Winter grew up in a small village on the outskirts of the Seelie lands

· Winter’s parents were both artisans, masters in their crafts

· His father was a smith and wood worker, his mother was a seamstress

· They were both in high regard with the Seelie court and many of the lower courts of both sides

· When Winter was growing up, he was always very studious and had an appreciation for beautiful things that his parents would make

· His mother often made dresses for ladies of varying courts

· His father forged weapons, but occasionally using his metalsmithing to make some decorative pieces as well

· They were both masters in their craft, Winter always knew he wanted to master whatever it was that he would take on

· When he turned nine, his father gifted him a halberd, the staff carved with intricate filigrees and vines, the head a leaf-blade

· He was growing up quickly, but was always a kind child

· Around this age, many children of the fae would go off to practice and hone their craft and begin apprenticeships with different Folk

· He never had much desire to stray too far from his family, they got on well and they were of high regard—he didn’t want to lose that

· So, he started to train with his halberd, testing out various weapons forged by his father as well

· Even though he was young, this age back in his day was a pivotal time in a Faerie’s life

· He soon decided that he would take up work with his father, working in the forge

· He and his father had a super close relationship, and their working together brought them much closer

· At this point, there wasn’t too much tension between the Seelie and Unseelie courts—King Brahm had recently passed the throne onto his successor, and The Seelie Queen had yet to wage any war against the new King of Unseelie

· Since this was a relatively peaceful time in the lands, there wasn’t much need for new weapons

· But, Winter and his father still would think up new designs, trying to optimise functionality as well as the aesthetic of the weapons

· Winter would test different concepts and see how they could improve—this made him very capable to fight using anything

· Another few years go by, and his family expands, welcoming a baby girl

· With his mother needing a bit more time to care for her, Winter’s father steps back to help raise their daughter and allows Winter to be the main man in the forge

· Yes, by the age of eleven (as it’s been a few years at this point), he’s working the forge mostly independently

· As much as he loves spending time in the forge, he’s sure to take time to hang out with his little sister

· He always loves showing her the beautiful pieces he makes, and as she gets older, sneaking her out at night to the forge to show them off to her

· She’s just as amused by them

· Of course, he doesn’t let her near any of the weapons or potentially dangerous items

· They make a habit of this, every few nights, they sneak out and head to the forge

· Winter doesn’t always show off creations, many nights the pair of them go to the roof of the forge and watch the stars, talking about different ideas and enjoying each other’s company

· By the time his sister is about seven, tensions are rising in the courts

· Though she’s still a bit young, she’s taken to helping out with sales and orders for the business

· She and Winter are the best of friends; however, like any sibling-relationship, they have their fights and their petty grudges every now and again

· But in a time like this, there’s more fights to worry about than their own

· Faeries are disappearing without reason, some rioting; royal guards are becoming more and more needed to protect the higher courts from other courts

· Winter begins noticing a slow but steady increase in the demand for weapons—but not just simple ones

· People need things to fight, to kill

· He doesn’t want to give them a hand in murder, but he knows that they need this business, they can’t fall out of respect for the courts—especially at a time like this

· He’s also lowkey created many swords and daggers in trying out various carving and smithing techniques, so it isn’t like he doesn’t have anything for them

· His sister is reluctant to help him move sales, she wishes they could get by without bloodshed as much as he does

· But a battle bigger than either of them is brewing, and they hardly have much choice

· He starts learning of a divide in the people of the lower courts—the call for unity only divided some of them further, and leaving some of them lost in between

· Meanwhile, as they belong to no one specific court, they’re stuck somewhere between all of this mess

· However, having been in high regard in the Seelie court, it’s no question that his parents are strongly siding with the Queen during all of this

· They hear that she is taking this time of a new Unseelie ruler as an opportunity to try and unite the courts under her rule

· Winter also hears the Unseelie Court is demanding to unite all courts under their rule

· Wishing for the simplest of unity, follows his parents to side in the Seelie Court, obeying their queen and supplying them with weapons of destruction

· His family, having been in high regard by the Queen and many of the courts that sided with her, is graciously welcomed

· The ruler of the court of Blossoms, a lower court falling mostly under the reign of the Seelie Court, has become the Seelie Queen’s right hand man

· He makes a vow on behalf of the Queen to protect them should they continue to assist them in the battle

· The family, of course, agrees to help

· So, Winter and his father work together on weapons

· His mother works on armour and gear that can better protect their soldiers

· Winter’s swordsmanship is constantly being improved day by day as he helps forge and test out different weapons

· He studies ways to make blades so powerful that even a small slit from one can cause a death so painful—but finds it too harrowing to even consider

· He instead settles for making poisoned blades—ones with a less horrific death—and painfully works through making iron arrowheads, burning his hands to affix them to rowan wood shafts

· This battle is building, and before they know it, an all-out war has begun

· Winter always is sure his sister is well protected in the court

· She’s young, she’s trusting, and kind

· But despite all that, as with many of the Fair Folk caught in this war, she’s terrified

· Some Folk are taking their young ones away to mortal realms in hopes of avoiding conflict

· Others are running into the deepest woods, hoping to never be found

· But that leaves them vulnerable to knights scouting out more recruits for their armies

· And the knights are scouting out more and more Folk as their armies slowly fall against the Unseelie court’s

· It isn’t long before they recruit in Winter, deeming him in peak physical condition to fight, dragging his father in as well

· His father manages out of it, using his place as weapon-maker as his escape from being thrown into the battlefield, saying how he’s too valuable to lose

· Winter, however, couldn’t do the same

· They’ve seen him practice with every weapon under the sun and know he’s damned good with whatever he chooses

· He splits his time training with the royal guard as well as working in the forge

· Winter’s skill with any weapon is astounding

· He’s a warrior by mistake, he never wanted to use his skills for harm

· He’s not yet to be sent out to battle, but they’ve begun a plan of attack on the Unseelie court

· Their general, Cadwalader, notices Winter’s expertise with many and any weapon he may choose, but encourages him to pick one to specialise

· That night, when he’s back with his family in their little home, he brings up the topic of selecting a priority weapon

· His sister, having sparred with him—though at the time, it was only for fun—suggests the swordstaff, saying how he’s always excelled with it

· He takes her suggestion to heart, knowing that though their spars were merely for fun, he always did subconsciously favour the swordstaff

· By his next training session with Cadwalader, he’s declared his weapon of choice and is soon practicing with other specialists in it

· Training and perfecting his combat was something he managed with ease

· He tended to play it more defensive, but was soon finding that fighting more offensively worked better for him as with his long range, he managed to get an upper hand on most of his sparring partners

· After some months, Winter is called into Cadwalader’s war room

· He’s being deployed in a part of the Seelie lands to hold down a fortress being overwhelmed by Unseelie soldiers

· He has a day to get prepared, and will be sent out with a group of four other soldiers to an outpost at dawn

· He’s forged many swordstaff before, but he puts extra work into one for himself

· He’s been practicing with a less-than-perfect one for the past few months

· Knowing time is limited, he keeps the pole, re-forging the blade and running a small vein through it, allowing it to be filled with poison that will seep from the tip of the weapon

· He wastes no time getting everything he needs in order

· He’s running through the tiny home that’s shared between the four of them, going back and forth to their forge

· Since his back-and-forth leave to the army, his father took on a new apprentice to help him keep up with their weapon stock

· His mother was taken in with a group of other seamstresses and jewellers to make various chainmaille and leather armours, using her advantage of having access to the forge to help with other armour pieces

· Though his parents are deep in their work, they all share the evening together to wish Winter their best and have a small celebratory “go kick ass, kiddo” dinner

· Before they bid a goodnight, Winter’s mother gave him a bag that she had made for him

· It was enchanted to be able to hold much more than it appeared

· She insisted he use it and take extra precaution and bring more weapons and supplies than he initially had set aside

· With a tearful smile, she wished him the best, kissing his cheek, commenting on how her little boy had grown into such a strong warrior

· That night, knowing sleep is beyond him, Winter leaves out to the forge

· He grabbed a few extra knives, daggers, a sword, and an extra head for his swordstaff

· Heading out to the forge past sundown wasn’t a new thing for him

· He’d done this for the past few weeks when he couldn’t sleep—head out to the forge, reminiscing to when he was younger and would watch the stars with his sister

· As if on cue, his sister comes out to the forge, asking if he really ought to leave

· During the time of forging weapon after weapon, going back and forth to training, he managed to carve out time to work on a necklace

· He knew eventually he was going to be sent out to fight, but just never really processed that it would happen when it did

· He wanted to give it to her, and today, potentially being the last time he may see her, was the perfect time to do so

· He pulled it out from behind one of the work benches, showing it off to her as it dangled in his hand

· The necklace is on a titanium chain, the pendant being a delicately carved heptagram made of the wood from a hornbeam tree

· He tells her of it, saying how the chain is of the strongest metals—nearly unbreakable; and how the wood, often referred to as iron wood, was among the strongest as well

· He gives her this and tells her it all to remind her that no matter what happens, that they are strong, that she is strong

· He says to her that the heptagram is to remind her of who they are, and also that if she finds herself missing him to just look up at the stars and know he’s under the same ones—wherever he may be—looking up at them, too

· She allows her big brother to drop the necklace over her head, freeing her hair from it once it rests on her collarbones

· In silence, the pair of them climb out to on top of the forge, lying down on the roof, watching the stars as though they were children again

· Breaking the silence, she asks him to promise to come back

· But he knows that he can’t make that promise

· She knows it too

· He says the next best thing that he can, telling her that he promises that he will lie down with her again and watch the stars with her the next time he sees her

· By sunrise, he was already gone, headed to the meeting spot that Cadwalader had given them

· He along with four other soldiers went off to check out the status of a fortress that had been ravaged by Unseelie knights

· They had an outpost a distance away, hidden in a thick copse of trees where they set up basecamp

· In turn, they would as swiftly and silently as possible skirt around the outside of the fortress where they couldn’t be seen, watching and trying to gather as much information as they could

· They remained at the outpost for nearly two months, a messenger arriving every nine days to gather information to return to General Cadwalader

· From what Winter had gathered, the Unseelie troupe would take as many forts and huts as they could, and plan a raid once they had the Seelie Courts blocked in

· Four days after the messenger had last met with them, he was back

· Winter had greeted him at the edge of the outpost, asking of his unusually early return

· He said he was simply there to alert them that they were to return promptly, their mission being fulfilled

· They had never heard word of how long their mission would be, but they somehow had expected it to be longer, or at least more eventful

· Upon their return, the Queen of the Seelie Court had asked an audience with Winter

· This set off several red flags in his mind: the Queen never asked an audience with anyone, and if she did, there would be much trouble to follow

· Cadwalader led him to a barren room, only the Queen and the light of a flickering candle casting shadows in the room

· Winter kneels before her, his voice calm as he asks what he may do for her

· She is dressed in a delicately embroidered gown, it sweeps the floor as she walks back and forth before him

· Her jaw is set, her back is arrow straight

· She wears an unreadable expression on her face as she scans Winter up and down

· “Son of our head weapon-maker and one of our beloved seamstresses, I must inform you of events that took place several days prior to your return”

· Winter, still kneeling, looks up at her as if asking she continue

· She meets his eyes and ceases her pacing

· “Your parents have been murdered”

· She breaks eye contact with him as if allowing him a moment to himself before she continues to pace and speak

· “They were killed by a group of Unseelie knights that broke in one evening and burned down your dwelling”

· Winter is furious and terrified

· “My Lady, if I may speak”

· She simply nods

· “You swore to protect my family in return for our assistance in your battle. Why were they left defenseless?” he asks, treading as lightly as he can with his accusation

· At this, she lets a small smile ghost across her face

· “I did no such thing, boy”

· Before Winter can get any words out, she continues, turning to pace in the other direction

· “Sir Molaff of the court of Blossoms, my advisor, told you this, correct?”

· “He did, My Lady”

· “And did you know that Sir Molaff is half mortal? That he can speak untruths?”

· The smirk on the Queen’s face is half hidden by the shadows in the room, but Winter still catches a glimpse of it

· “You betrayed us,” Winter growls, “you conniving, treacherous tyrant”

· “Molaff is a treacherous tyrant, I am but who he answers to”

· Before Winter can get his rebuttal, the queen cuts him off again

· “Now, you and your family swore to obey me in witness of Molaff,” she stops her pacing and turns to him, eyes burning as she locks eyes with him, “you will obey your queen and return to where you left off before Cadwalader recruited you. I am hereby removing you from his garrison, you are no longer to be within an hour’s walk of him or his army”

· Despite Winter’s detest to have joined Cadwalader and his army, he had grown used to it, almost as though he may have enjoyed it

· “You will return to what is left of your forge and double the production of weaponry with the apprentice that worked alongside your father”

· He’s fuming, clenching his teeth and staring daggers at the Queen, but trying to keep somewhat of a decent composure

· At this point, the Queen steps back from Winter, her arms behind her back

· Winter’s eyes drop to the floor

· But in all of this talk, he’s yet to have heard a word about his sister

· She was just to turn nine shortly after he had left, and now there was no word of her

· He was afraid to ask about her, perhaps she didn’t even know about her

· But he had to know that his sister was safe

· Grinding his teeth and blinking hard, he looked back up to the queen

· “What of my sister?”

· The Queen took a breath, shaking her head as she met his eyes once again

· “She disappeared in the incident. Her body was nowhere to be found”

· He lets out a breath he had been holding in, she wasn’t dead for sure

· Though this wasn’t exactly what he’d wanted to hear, he knew it meant that there was still a chance that she was alive

· “I will tell you this, I surveyed the scene. There is no mistake of it. I give you my words in honour for the promise to serve that you made me the year that your family joined our forces.”

· Winter was biting the inside of his lip, trying to keep from his still simmering anger

· “You will now honour that promise you pledged to me and return to the forge at once. You are no longer recognised as a knight or a soldier of Cadwalader’s army. You are allowed two days to grieve, and will be expected to continue your work in the forge once the sun has risen by the second day”

· With that, Winter was taken out of the room by two guards and escorted to the burned remains of his home

· He walked through it, finding nothing but ash and flowers

· He had the bag his mother had given him, he emptied it of many of the extra weapons that he had on him, grabbing some of the few surviving items

· Among those items were three notebooks: one being his father’s, two being his mother’s

· They each contained plans and research for their respective fields of work, ways to enchant garments for optimal protection, methods that would create stronger blades and bows

· He then walked into the forge, seeing it only partly torn through

· He sat on a work bench, swinging his legs as he went through one of his own notebooks on research for poisoned blades

· He rethought of all the words that the Queen had said, trying to figure out what his options were

· Yes, the Queen had commanded him to return to the forge and create more weapons for destruction, but she could only command him to do so under an oath that he had sworn to her

· Winter’s parents had pledged their allegiance to the Seelie Queen, vowing to serve for her, that much was true

· But Winter never did

· The Queen was ordering him to honour a pledge that he never made

· He was not tied to her orders

· On top of that, he had been stripped of his rank, and he hadn’t been instated as a smith since his call to the army

· He wasn’t tied to these lands

· He had no reason to stay here

· As much as he hated Molaff for betraying them, he felt a deep satisfaction in Molaff telling the Queen that he had sworn allegiance to her

· Not long after pondering his options, Winter stuffed as many old scrolls and notebooks full of plans and research of weapons that he deemed important enough

· He felt a sting as he held tightly to the bag his mother had given him

· It was her parting gift to him, but the circumstances that proved today were opposite to what they had been before

· They thought that Winter would be the one to die in his leave, not them

· With a final scan through the forge, he spots a notebook underneath one of the benches

· Picking it up, dusting it off, he opens it

· Winter recognises the weapon design

· It was one he had found a few years ago, so complex that it took up a third of a book of notes

· The weapon, in its complexity and horror was one that he never dared to make

· He swiftly closed the book and slid it into the bag

· It was full of notes, books, scrolls, and a few weapons

· He wouldn’t leave these plans for anyone

· He wouldn’t let anyone cause this destruction

· Winter went to the furnace, lighting it up for the final time

· He gathered armfuls of wooden weapons, setting them alight in the flames

· He took armfuls of the metal weapons, throwing them deep into the fire

· This court had betrayed his family, this court let them burn

· He would let their supply burn in his leave

· When he exited the forge, it was impossible for any passerby to notice anything amiss

· The forge was always smoking from the chimney above, it was always burning and melting materials to be wrought

· Nobody would suspect a thing

· It was late evening, many of the Folk would be settling in for sleep or awaking soon

· More simply said, not many Folk were out at this time

· He stole away then, casual in his depart as to not alert any suspicion

· He went in the direction of the training tower he used to frequent

· Knowing he was forbidden from being near Cadwalader didn’t stop him, he knew that the Queen’s advisor would be there as he often was

· Sir Molaff often would arrive to check the progress of General Cadwalader and his fighters

· Surely enough, when Winter wandered by, he spotted him

· He was dressed in a velvet doublet with the insignia of a the Seelie Court embroidered on it

· He was walking down the trail from the tower, his point in the path near the treeline that Winter was walking through

· Carefully, Winter pulled his swordstaff from the bag, creeping silently towards him

· He knew Molaff knew he was there, but if he had a care of it, it didn’t show

· Winter had never felt such a bloodlust in himself until this very moment

· He sprang into action, barring Molaff against the trunk of a honey locust tree with his swordstaff, where no one could see them

· “You let them die, you betrayed us”

· Molaff laughed at his accusations, his face amused by Winter’s words

· “You are a disgrace to this land,” Winter spat, feeling his heart thundering in his chest

· He pushed Molaff harder into the tree, the thorns of it pricking his skin as it began to bleed

· Molaff’s laughter ceased as he realised what was happening, his visage remained amused despite the fact

· “I may be a disgrace to this land, as you claim, but I am not nearly as disgraced as you will be for killing your Queen’s personal advisor”

· “Who said she was my queen?”

· Molaff’s eyes went blank in the moment, as though truly seeing the bloodthirst in Winter’s eyes

· Winter held Molaff fast against the tree at his chest with one arm, the other dropping his weapon and drawing out a dagger with a toothed blade

· “If you are to kill me, young smith, perhaps allow me a fair duel to keep the remaining shreds of your dignity in tact?”

· “What fairness should I offer you?”

· Winter rested the blade on Molaff’s shoulder

· “The same fairness that you gave my family in a false oath of protection?”

· He sliced across Molaff’s chest, the teeth of the dagger tearing his skin

· He went wide-eyed as he stared at Winter in utter horror

· “The dignity of a man so willing to betray a humble smith and seamstress?”

· He drew the serrated blade down again, cutting across his cheek

· As his blood poured and his the ground, blood-red blossoms grew from the grass

· “We share the same dignity, you and I; but the only difference?”

· He stepped back from Molaff, his arm no longer holding him against the wall

· He fell to the ground, clutching at his chest

· Winter wiped the bloodied dagger off on the soft mossy earth beneath them, picking up his swordstaff in turn

· “The only difference is that I have nothing left to lose”

· With that, Winter drove the bladed staff through Molaff’s heart, watching him bleed out into the grass

· His blood trailed down into the ground, more blood-red blossoms sprouting in its wake

· With Molaff dead, he began to seemingly melt away under the forming flowers, Winter took a step back

· He just killed somebody

· And the worst part of it?

· He felt no remorse

· He fled from the place of the murder of the Queen’s royal advisor

· The sun was nearly set, the light was fading quickly

· Winter felt powerful

· He had never felt so much power, the adrenaline was coursing through his veins

· Winter made way running through the Seelie lands

· He had to get out of there before anyone saw him standing at Molaff’s dissolving corpse

· He also knew that when the Queen found out Molaff had been killed, she would almost certainly know he was the culprit

· So he stole away to the in-between lands, the land of the Wild Fey who refused to pledge themselves to the Seelie or Unseelie Courts

#general winter #gabe writes #tda #lm #los #qoaad #headcanons #headcanon #headcannons #headcannon #scheduled post

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teawiththegods · 5 years

Note

Dark aspects of deities anon 1/3. For Dionysus, I've always connected more with the madness and liberating aspects. He is active in my life only in Winter, which happens to be when he goes to Underworld. And most of my dealings with him were about death and rebirth. He comes to me when I must change or break free from something. These processes are often very painful but necessary for my own survival. As for Aphrodite, I have been at war with her for a while and resisting her will, all while

2/3 worshipping her. Her intentions are always good, she's always been clear about wanting the best for me, but reaching that ideal asked for a lot of sacrifices and self doubts. They push my limits, all the time. It's growth, but the feeling of marching a long walk through the Underworld is real. I thankfully don't have this kind of relationship with all the Theoi, I've found the sweetest and softest ones to be Apollo, Zeus and Hera.3/3 Hera in particular is, in my personal experience, a very warm goddess.

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences! It’s interesting because your relationship with Dionysus reminds me a lot of mine with Persephone. Recently I noticed that when she descends into the Underworld my life kind of goes to shit. I go through the hardest and darkest parts of my life when she’s in her dark role and Ive realized thats not a coincidence especially this past year when I began thinking a lot about ageing, the future, having a limited amount of time, and mortality and death. But i also noticed that while that time of year is difficult I also have my biggest transformations through those struggles. She tends to be the one urging me to face the darker things in life and the darker parts of myself. The whole “marching a long walk through the Underworld” i get with Persephone.

Apollo for me is not dark but also not necessarily “sweet”. He’s tough and strict with me, but I know he’s like that bc he knows thats what i need. I have zero self discipline so he has to be the whole “tough love” thing in order to push me to reach my potential.

It is interesting how each of us can receive different sides and aspects of the gods. Like how i have never experienced the dark side of Aphrodite. In my years with her she has been nothing but sweet, soft, warm, and motherly. I admit i keep waiting for it, but so far it never comes. Perhaps she doesn’t feel the need to since i have Persephone now pulling me into the dark depths? Who knows? Only the gods know their reasons. But i do still think its important for us to acknowledge that there are darker aspects of the gods and that some of us will experience those sides.

Thank you again for not only sharing your experiences but for bringing this topic up so our community may discuss it!

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uselessnocturnal · 5 years

Text

Stupid for You

olivarry secret santa 2018 | blind date

summary;; it starts with a blind date and a mistake but slowly becomes so much more.

notes;; This is my Secret Santa gift to @likeaspeedingarrow and I think I managed to combine elements from all the tropes you gave me :) I hope you like it and happy holidays! // special thanks to @temmie-loony and @zealousconnoisseurrebel for helping me out

read the full fic on ao3

—————————————————

Barry has been waiting in Stubbs for twenty-seven minutes now. The waiters have started giving him pitying looks as they serve him yet another glass of tap water – even the lady sitting in the corner of the café shoots him a sympathetic glance over the rim of her mug before returning to an animated conversation with her friends.

Fingers drumming against the marble table, he ducks his head, feeling oddly exposed sitting in the centre of the coffee shop alone at a table for two. His phone lights up and his heart leaps to his throat, having finally been acknowledged.

the best: sorry, barr! i’m going Christmas shopping with eddie

nerd: you only have two days left!

nerd: how have you not bought everything?

the best: i know i know sorryy

the best: rain check?

It takes all of Barry’s self-control not to groan out loud. It’s not the first time Iris has cancelled plans with him for her most recent love interests (in this case it’s Eddie but the difference is that Barry actually likes this guy). He’s not jealous in any way – Iris is practically his sister! – in fact, he’s happy for them; even then, it would have been nice if she’d texted him before he ended up humiliating himself in his sad isolation.

For goodness sake, everyone thought he had been stood up by a blind date! A single half-eaten slice of cheesecake sits temptingly in front of him – a pity gift that the waiters blessed upon him. It would’ve been humiliating if the cake hadn’t tasted so good.

All things considered, though, he couldn’t be too bitter. It’s some twisted sense of tasting his own medicine – especially since he’s definitely left Iris waiting at least an hour and a half before at some convention.

He’s just about to leave when his eyes flicker to the door, its bell still ringing and everything stops.

Oliver Queen walks through the door. Oliver-freaking-Queen.

There’s a surprising lack of reaction amongst the other patrons – either they don’t notice (too distracted by their own conversations) or they don’t recognise him. Heck, Barry’s not even sure if it actually is Oliver Queen; the man is only wearing a thin autumn jacket over a shirt and jeans which is ridiculous considering the sub-zero temperature outside.

Barry is frozen. Every thought in his brain is screaming for him to get a grip and look away or act casual or something – anything is better than blatant staring! Really, who can blame him. Oliver Queen is a god walking the mortal grounds. Everything from his clear but guarded blue-green eyes and his muscles to his confidence and the way he can silence a crowd with a single look. If Oliver Queen claimed the sky was purple, several would probably actually check.

Though not exactly a celebrity, the Queens are relatively well known: especially with Robert Queen getting lost at sea and the consequent plummet of Queen Consolidated. Oliver Queen himself had been a bit of a legend before, having been a well-known billionaire’s playboy son. Now, however, he seems to keep to himself, slowly building his father’s company back up and keeping away from the tabloids. There really isn’t that much Barry knows about him – except that Oliver is very hot.

Barry is still watching at Oliver as the man scans the room. Next thing Barry knows, Oliver has those demanding blue eyes fixed on him and is striding in a clear and direct path to Barry’s table.

He’ll deny it in the future, but he panics.

There are literal seconds before Oliver reaches his table and, in true Barry Allen style, he tears his gaze away and attempts some semblance of nonchalance by jamming his glass to his mouth before realising that it’s empty and now he looks like even more of an idiot.

Whether Oliver doesn’t notice or chooses to spare Barry the humiliation, it’s a true blessing that he decides not to mention anything.

Oliver stops by the empty seat opposite Barry and Barry makes proper eye contact for the first time. There’s a slight tilt in Oliver’s lips – the kind of framed smile that people have as they’re about to make an important business transaction. And yet, Oliver shifts his weight from one foot to another, his eyes slightly uneasy.

He’s nervous, Barry realises, along with something along the lines of whythefuckohmygoshwhat.

“Hi...ah,” Oliver begins his question with a lack of fluency that is uncharacteristic for him, “are you my blind date?”

Now, Barry’s had a lot of shocks today and it seems to be snowballing to become even more chaotic but this? This was ridiculous.

All it takes is a single question to unleash the rambling mess that is Barry Allen.

It’s as though he’s lost his brain to mouth filter and his limbs aren’t even functioning properly and oh gosh is he trying to stand up?

“I’m Barry,” he introduces, scrambling up to shake the other man’s hand, almost knocking over his glass, “I’ve been here for quite a while...not that I’m trying to make you feel bad! I just - uh -”

Oliver takes Barry’s warm hand in his own, skepticism colouring his eyes.

“Right - ah - sorry,” Barry’s head lowers praying that the burning in his cheeks isn’t obvious, “Should we sit down? I think- I think we should sit.”

With all the grace and poise of a CEO in the making, Oliver takes the chair opposite Barry’s, barely drawing any attention to his practically incoherent speech.

“Oliver Queen” he reinforces, smiling slightly in the hope that it’d put the young man at ease, “it’s nice to meet you, Barry.”

There’s almost frantic head bobbing, “Yeah, I know. That you’re Oliver, not the second part,” he winces, suddenly realising how creepy that sounds, “I’m sorry, I tend to go off when I’m nervous, I’ll stop now. It’s nice to meet you too. You can have some of this cheesecake.”

Letting out a less-than-obvious breath, Barry sinks into his chair, watching Oliver carefully poke at the cake with a fork and praying that maybe - just maybe - he’d be able to control his speech

There’s no obvious sign that Oliver’s getting more comfortable but he’s not leaving either so that’s a good sign, Barry decides. And then it hits him: Oliver’s here on a blind date. He thinks I’m his blind date.

Really and truly, Barry has messed up.

“So, Barry, what do you work as?” Oliver starts, somehow composed despite Barry’s apparent humiliation.

Good. Great. This is a question Barry can answer without messing up. “I’m a CSI at CCPD - assistant CSI actually. I’ve been working there for a couple of years now.”

Oliver nods like that makes sense and hey, maybe this conversation isn’t too bad after all!

“There have been the recent cases,” Barry remembers, his eyes lighting up, “they’re so...bizarre.”

Immediately, he launches into the story of a murder involving a banjo and a microwave and Oliver listens in fascination, a small smile on his face as he listens to the brunette speak with such passion.

“Why a CSI?” Oliver asks, leaning forward in his seat.

Barry pauses, the usual lie already sitting on his tongue instead decides to be honest, “Well, my father got framed for my mother’s murder.”

Oliver stills suddenly, hyperaware of the feelings and guilty for stumbling upon a sensitive topic but Barry carries on, trying to veer the conversation away from this sombre tone, “I am learning to accept it...it’s not easy and I’m never going to stop trying to find the real killer but it no longer plagues me at night.”

He offers Oliver a soft and sincere smile, a show of support that someday it will get better.

“Even so,” Barry adds sheepishly, “I’m a bit of a science nerd so I probably would have ended up in a similar situation anyway.”

He doesn’t really give Oliver time to respond, instead plunging into another unique topic of conversation, “Ya know zombies do exist?” before going on to describe zombie ants and they get sucked in to their own bubble of a world which is all hope and light and God, how did Barry get on to talking about penguins.

“They’re the most loving of all animals!” Barry insists, arms flailing, “they huddle and everything!”

Oliver’s arms rest on the table as he laughs. A true laughter that kind of resounds throughout the coffee shop, the sound of the smile in his eyes overflowing into the air.

It’s that moment Barry knows he really is in trouble.

Watching Oliver grin, all-teeth and eyes, hearing his laughter...Barry knows he would do anything to keep that kind of joy on Oliver Queen’s face. Which is ridiculous because he’s crushing on a guy who thinks Barry is his date when he really isn’t.

This is a mess.

It only gets worse when there’s suddenly a mess of blonde hair and scarf appears in the corner of his vision.

“Ah, hi,” she starts, readjusting her glasses and turning to Oliver, “Are you Oliver?”

One glance at his narrowed eyes and she ploughs on, “I’m so sorry – there was this bus and some really bad traffic and I knew I was going to late…but I’m here now!”

A hesitant laugh escapes her and she sticks out a firm hand, “Felicity. Smoak. Laurel Lance set us up I think?”

The bubble doesn’t pop. It freezes and shatters.

There’s a sinking feeling in Barry’s stomach. Oliver’s eyes widen infinitesimally, not-quite hurt rolling off him in waves, as he turns to stare questioningly at Barry who ducks his head, avoiding further eye contact and hopes that the burning shame is not at all obvious.

The woman, Felicity, holds her hands up and gestures vaguely to the two, “Wait. Am I- am I interrupting something?”

Yes. Barry wants to say but how can he when the situation is his fault anyway.

Through his lowered lashes he can see Oliver tilt his head and put on a half-smile.

“No, not at all. Barry and I were just catching up,” he reassures her with all the ease of a CEO.

Barry’s head shoots up, all too willing to go along with the lie, “Ye-yeah, no, don’t worry about it. I was just leaving.

Stumbling to his feet like a deer just learning to walk - all limbs and no coordination - Barry gathers his jacket up and gives Felicity what he hopes is a reassuring smile but could be mistaken for a grimace, painfully aware that his ears are scarlet and refusing to meet Oliver’s eyes.

“Sorrysorrysorry,” he mumbles - both to Felicity for being in her way and to Oliver for...everything, “it was nice - uh -seeing you, Oliver.”

Head lowered, he speed walks (read: scrambles) out of the café where the bitter wind slaps him.

For a moment he stands there, the chill clawing into his bones, absolutely mortified.

What the hell did he just do?

continue reading here

#olivarry secret santa 2018 #olivarry #oliver queen #barry allen #coffee shop #blind date #first kiss #fanfic #ao3 #iris west #thea queen #laurel lance #felicity smoak #soft future boyfriends following their hearts #supportive sisters #lyss writes #arrowverse is whack

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ellawritesficssometimes · 6 years

Text

I’ll start this by doing a brief summary of what I’ve already theorized on the topic before adding my recent addition to it.

Prussia and Fritz’s flute playing, along with the motif of marching forward and national consolidation in a military context, also bears extreme significance when you connect it to some of the underlying themes running through Germany and Prussia’s current relationship.

The flute is symbolically important in that it’s often depicted as an instrument used by the Gods. It’s used to channel their voices. For instance, Ancient Egyptians believed that it channeled the voice of Isis, the Goddess of life and magic. She was also known for her healing spells, those of which cured the sick and brought the dead back to life.

In Greek mythology the flute is associated with Pan, God of the wild. He is also associated with the shepherd, whose primary duty is to tend to their flock of sheep by bringing them together.

Now, the flute was first used by Fritz in a marching song intended to instill a sense of consolidation and strength among his troops. Taken symbolically, Fritz, as the shepherd, used the flute to bring his flock of troops together.

I’ve also theorized before that Prussia, who adored Fritz and therefore likely adopted the flute-playing from the latter, also took on the role of the shepherd when he united the flock of fragmented German states to form one sovereign nation – the German Confederation. It was a military march that culminated in unification.

With that said, this theory will be making the assertion that Prussia has chosen his next successor to undertake the role of the shepherd – Germany.

The strip “Private Flute Concert” is essential to this theory in that it gives us some of the biggest hints of connections between Germany and Holy Rome. Evidence of this symbolic divine reference can be found when Prussia talks about the “sacred journey of the flute.”

As designated by the title, Prussia gives Germany a private flute concert.

Notice how as Prussia plays, he has a flashback to another private concert he had... with his little brother no less.

There, a sick and bed-ridden Holy Rome expresses surprise at Prussia’s ability to play the instrument. What’s important here is that Holy Rome refers to Prussia as a “war-maniac.”

The connection surfaces once Prussia halts playing and removes himself from the flashback. Germany expresses surprise at Prussia’s ability to play, and Prussia echoes his previous conversation with Holy Rome by likewise referring to himself as a “war-maniac” in his defense of this ability.

So, why is it that I think Germany is the next shepherd to be?

For one thing, in another chapter that echoes Prussia’s flashback, Prussia reads Grimm Fairy Tales to a dying Holy Rome.

Another connection emerges when you notice that one of the illustrators was named Ludwig Grimm, who also just so happened to play the flute. Once again, notice the flute’s herding properties; in this case, Ludwig Grimm’s flute causes a flock of pigeons to come together.

Perhaps this is why Germany’s human name is Ludwig. What if it was Prussia who gave it to him, either as a tribute to his predecessor, or as a tribute to his forgotten past? [I lean more towards the latter]

While Holy Rome himself was not good at drawing and was more erratic and impulsive in temperament, we know that Germany has a more structured and composed personality. He would therefore be more adamant on practicing and perfecting this skill. Here, he’s shown to have considerable artistic competency when he draws Italy.

That said, it’s also important to mention that this personality difference between Holy Rome and Germany is accounted for and justified in chapter 1 of World Stars. When a personification gains a new title, it’s possible for them to acquire a new personality.

Since Holy Rome is seen to exist well after his dissolution, it’s not farfetched to assume that he never actually died. A theory on that [here]. In fact, given how much evidence there is that Germany is suffering from amnesia [theory here], these two arcs seem to form yet another connection whereby Hima’s implying at the possibility of him being Holy Rome.

All right. With all that said, let’s tie this together.

Prussia is no more in modern times, and so is East Germany, albeit formally. [It’s heavily and painfully obvious that he’s East Germany, but I have yet to see him explicitly be referred to as this].

Here’s one example of how obvious, yet indirect the hints of Prussia being East Germany are:

“We have to get rid of the "wall in our hearts", so that the country can get better and the progress will be naturally more effective!

When the Ostalgie level gets higher, Russia imposes himself on my big brother. [ T/N: Ostalgie is a combination of Ost (East) and Nostalgie] ”

Nonetheless, in the same concert strip, we also know that Prussia doesn’t heal as fast as he should after being bitten by Germany’s dog. On top of that, he lies to Germany about when he acquired the injury. It would follow, then, that perhaps Prussia’s immortality is waning.

However, this shouldn’t cause us any panic, since we know that it’s possible for personifications to live on and become state representatives after losing their nationhood:

“Usually, when the culture or the country's personality dies/disappears, the country would gradually disappear or entrust him/herself to the country that takes over him/her.

There are also cases that him/her is not a country but continues to live leisurely as a representative of a region.”

[Source: It’s a treasure box of countries.]

It’s these particular panels that are of interest to me.

That’s right. Prussia’s pushing for Germany to take up playing the flute. Situating this in its symbolic context, doesn’t it seem that Prussia is asking for Germany to heal his newfound mortal weakness?

The country was consolidated by a march that Prussia led. Now that the country is consolidated again after the fall of the Berlin Wall, his reason of being [a personification] is no more.

It’s Germany who now leads the figurative march in running their country. There’s also the fact that Germany has a character song titled “Vorwärts Marsch!” Translation: Forward March!

If Germany’s marching forward in running an already consolidated nation, he leaves Prussia behind. There’s not much use for the latter now.

How I interpret this is that by giving Germany the flute, Prussia is recognizing that 1) his time has passed or 2) he’s relying on Germany to help fix/heal his broken immortality.

Prussia gave life to Germany, but what about vice-versa?

#hetalia #aph prussia #aph Germany #mysteries of hetalia

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realm-of-dragons · 4 years

Text

Staff App - Nemu (OC)

Played by Admin Grimm

OOC:

Name: Grimm

Age: 21

Preferred Pronouns: Any!

Timezone: PST

Discord: N/A

Any topics you want added to the content warning list?: Pandemics

Second choice character?: Bakugo or Hawks

IC:

Name: Takahashi Nemu

Age: 48, physically older due to magic abuse.

Gender ID / pronouns: Cis-Male, He/Him

OTPs, BroTPs, or NoTPS?: I have ship plans, but because of the particular dynamic, we’re always down for more dumb drama- It should be noted, however, that Nemu is demisexual/demiromantic and is predisposed for deep and unhealthy obsession.

Race: Human, Mage

Appearance: Nemu is extremely short and on the thinner side, though his build is still fairly healthy. He has long violet hair, which he rarely ties back, and it tends to fall across his face when he’s working. His eyes are light gray and have permanent dark circles stretched beneath them. He almost always has a scowl and very rarely smiles, although he has been rumored to smile at small children. In spite of his age, his skin is relatively smooth; this is the result of regular rejuvenation potion consumption.

Role: Court Physician and Alchemist, serving King Toshinori. Technically a healer, though he doesn’t practice it much anymore.

Skills:

Nemu specializes in healing magic, although he very rarely uses it to directly heal injuries.

Primarily, he enchants potions capable of inducing sleep, easing pain, and promoting regenerative functions within the body.

His sleeping draught is infamous, and an invention of his own. He’s improved the process and strength of most of the potions regularly made by court healers.

In his youth, he was often regarded as a prodigy and genius, although in recent years he’s let his progress slip due to failing health, and in pursuit of more dubious research.

He once theorized a method for applying the trade off of human magic to combat, wherein he healed himself by using an enemy’s life energy as a catalyst- After a single application born from desperation, he burned the documents, and has since marked it as a forbidden magic never to be pursued.

He has negative combat skills. He’s garbage in a fight. He will die. Don’t make him fight.

Backstory:

1.)

The cauldron bubbles in front of him, smoke billowing up. He’s done this a thousand times before, the ingredients and motions are practically instinctual- He could repeat the actions in his sleep, if he had to- and perhaps this is no different. Fatigue and permanent exhaustion eat away his consciousness. He wonders when he’ll cease existing in the present.

Shadows dance around him, closing in. Just like that, for a brief moment, he is ten years old again; ten years old, naive, gullible, and proud, but ten years old and a prodigy. He remembers the praise he received when he first successfully enchanted a potion, the exhaustion that followed after, and the pride in his parents eyes. Ten years old, prodigal, and the genius son of two mages. At ten, he could spin sleeping draughts that even adult alchemists struggled with.

That was the last time he felt rested.

He applies a bit too much force with his spell. The moment ends. The cauldron bubbles over. He yelps, scrambling to salvage his mistake.

There’s no use. He’ll start over. It’ll probably be another sleepless night spent fixing his mistakes. He’s hardly ten years old anymore. At forty-eight, washed out and struggling to stay afloat, Nemu wonders when he’ll become obsolete.

Soon, he thinks. He’s expiring. It’s just a matter of time.

2.)

Nemu serves his king diligently, but from a respectable distance.

It wasn’t always like this. Nemu would never dare presume he was ever friends with the king, but friendly, perhaps. They spoke more frequently, and with less tension. Nemu is never certain whether that tension is definite, or whether it’s a mere product of his sleep deprivation. Answers will never come because he’s fine the way things are now.

Brewing potions takes little effort, even now as his health begins to slip. This is something he can do in his sleep, if necessary. It’s his element. Even as the fatigue settles in, making day to day tasks more difficult, he’s still trudging onward with his work. There’s no need to stop. He’s useful this way.

So he brews his potions daily. Sometimes, he may tend directly to an ill noble or an injured knight. Sometimes - more rarely - he might see the king.

King Toshinori is a kind man. He is the type of person beloved by every individual he speaks to, and Nemu has no doubt that it’s deserved. He’s almost single handedly united an entire race into one fully functioning and peaceful society, right? That’s what everyone says, that’s what he’s praised for. He’s the type of person who cherishes everyone he meets, regardless of status.

But that’s the problem, isn’t it? The king is too kind.

Nemu thinks of what he’s done, what he’s given up, what’s been sacrificed and left to perish within his own flesh for the benefit of another. He thinks of all the choices he’s ever made that contributed to his downfall, and how with a change in perspective, they could be viewed as either noble loyalty or ingrained stupidity. He knows that if King Toshinori knew the truth, he would view his actions as neither. Because that’s the problem. King Toshinori is kind, and Nemu gave up far more than any sane person would to keep him alive. Knowing would lead to nothing but pitiful guilt.

So Nemu avoids him.

Some days are easier than others.

3.)

“Are you okay?”

It’s one of those rare moments when King Toshinori manages to hunt him down. Nemu knows he’s difficult to find, because he’s purposely avoiding the king, for a plethora of reasons. King Toshinori’s frown makes Nemu's scowl deepen. It’s… A complex situation, isn’t it? Isn’t it? Of course it was stupid to think he could go undetected forever. Talking to King Toshinori is inevitable. It always is.

Nemu wants to ignore the question outright, but this is the king, and he expects an answer. No. Of course he’s not okay. When has he ever been okay? The more he uses his damn magic the worse it gets. That’s why he gave up healing, isn’t it? He’s constantly exhausted, suffers from frequent minor ailments(it could be worse, he tries to reason), and his magic is growing more difficult to control. There are days he cannot sleep at all, plagued by the torment of his body - or sometimes his brain - and there are others where he cannot tell if he’s sleeping or awake.

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to question the very air you breathe? ‘What if I drown? What if this isn’t really oxygen I’m sucking in? What if I’m not really here?’ Do you ever take a step and think, ‘what if the floor isn’t really there, what if I’m just imagining it’? ‘What if I take one more step and it gives way, and I fall, and never stop falling?’

Nemu stares at his feet, words catching at his lips. There is, of course, the other matter. The injury. Nemu saved his life, and he does not regret it, not really- But King Toshinori doesn’t know the price he paid to heal him. Because it isn’t that simple. The king should have died. He might have, really. Nemu still isn’t certain. No mortal man should have survived such injuries.

Nemu still remembers the pain. The sounds. The light. The abrupt feeling of age catching up to him. As he’d later confirmed with another healer, he had aged. Not enough for others to notice, but enough to remind him of the grimm reality that every action has a consequence. That magic has a price.

He can’t say any of that, though, and King Toshinori expects an answer, so he bites his lip and swallows his disdain.

“I’m fine.” He lies through gritted teeth. He doesn’t know if it’s convincing but he no longer cares.

4.)

There is but one thing Chiharu ever says that resonates with him; ‘rules are meant to be broken.’ Perhaps not in the context of the law- Nemu is hardly lawful, but he knows when to play at obedience. There is a natural order to adhere to, and he hardly has the energy to fight his own body on good days, let alone deal with the consequences of immorality. That makes them different.

The two of them combined are wrong. They fit together like water and oil, and Nemu’s never certain who is which, but they agree on one thing, and one thing alone. There must be a way to cheat the cost of performing magic. Nemu is generally rule abiding, but even he recognizes when alternative means are necessary.

Chiharu doesn’t question his sudden change in moral principles, though he does ask why now. Nemu, lost in thought, doesn’t know how to best answer. There’s no rhyme or reason for the change, but it isn’t some childish whim. It’s been building for a while, he thinks. Since Toshinori’s injury. Since he retired from healing. Since the fatigue set in and refused to leave. Since the realization he’s expiring faster than he ought to be. He doesn’t know. There’s little sentimentality between he and Chiharu, and Nemu doubts there ever will be. But that doesn’t matter.

“I’ve sold my soul to save another,” he begins, the words poetic but bitter on his tongue. “I want it back.”

Chiharu just laughs, deep and more than a bit sinister, but he takes Nemu’s hand.

No… There is no sentimentality, but Chiharu will humor him, because there is loyalty, and in the end, they desire the same thing.

Change.

Extras:

Nemu suffers from a mix of chronic fatigue and insomnia as side effects to magic overuse. He is quite vocal about his insomnia but has become quite adept at hiding the fatigue.

On most days one would only notice something amiss if they knew him particularly well before the incident, but on bad days he tends to lock himself away in either his living space or his lab, depending on how impactful it is on his ability to work.

Nemu prefers bland foods, and absolutely despises excessive spice. He does not season his food when left to prepare it on his own, and he is rarely allowed to cook for other people.

He loves cats, although he has not kept one around in over a decade.

Writing sample:

Nemu has met the king’s advisor before. The man is no stranger, although he is strange - Nemu himself is strange, but of a different variety. He’s human, and in spite of what he’s been told, he gets the very distinct feeling that Aizawa is not. Nemu has never particularly cared whether his patients are human or otherwise - he specializes in human healing, but he’s picked up knowledge and skills to help anyone in need.

But that’s not entirely relevant, because Aizawa isn’t here regarding himself.

“The king is coughing, again.” Aizawa tells him, and Nemu nods.

Of course. It’s always the king.

He goes about gathering ingredients, taking care to select only the highest quality ones from his stores. He has potions made up already, but everything made for the king is made by his own two hands, and he doesn’t know who brewed the last batch of this specific recipe. Aizawa watches him work, refusing to leave, and Nemu does his best to ignore him. There’s no difference whether he’s alone or in company - he’ll get his work done regardless, and he’ll do it well.

But… Aizawa doesn’t ordinarily stay. Not like this. Nemu has served the king for many years, and he may not be the most trustworthy person alive, but his skills and loyalty are unfaltering. Eyes narrowed, he glances at the advisor. “There’s something you wish to say. You wouldn’t be here still, otherwise.”

“You’re avoiding King Toshinori.”

Oh.

Nemu was not expecting… That. Whatever responses Nemu holds die on his tongue as he struggles to process the situation. He has been avoiding the king. There’s no excuse and no denial. He’s been avoiding King Toshinori, and that’s the entire truth. But… It shouldn’t be an issue, right? It really shouldn’t be, not when he’s just a man. Sure, they’d been on friendly terms, prior, but Nemu isn’t friends with the fucking king. He can choose whether he wants to isolate, can’t he?

There are a lot of ways he could respond. He could be sympathetic, perhaps, and apologize. He could promise to do better, to change his ways and seek the king out more often, if it really makes such a difference. He could be polite - but he isn’t. Instead, he chooses sarcasm, because he can’t fathom how his behaviors in any way matter to the king. “Oh, I’m sure he’s so disappointed in my absence.” Nemu scoffs, returning to his ingredients. He has work to do, after all.

Aizawa regards him for another moment before responding, “Don’t.”

As the advisor turns to leave, Nemu calls out “I won’t.” But it’s a lie, and he’s certain Aizawa sees right through him.

#bnha oc rp #mha oc rp #staff apps

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334: Why We Need Salt (& How Much) With Robb Wolf

New Post has been published on https://healingawerness.com/news/334-why-we-need-salt-how-much-with-robb-wolf/

334: Why We Need Salt (& How Much) With Robb Wolf

Child: Welcome to my Mommy’s podcast.

This episode is sponsored by UpSpring Baby, a company making innovative science-backed products for moms and babies. And I want to tell you about one of their products in particular because even though I’m not even currently pregnant or have tiny babies, it’s been really helpful to me. I really like their Stomach Settle nausea relief drops, which are great for any kind of stomach upset from motion sickness, which I get and a couple of my daughters get, to morning sickness. which I thankfully do not have right now because I’m not pregnant, but any kind of bloating or digestive upset at all. I love to keep this on hand and my kids like them too. They help relieve nausea, motion sickness, gas, bloating, and any kind of digestive upset. In fact, I keep these in my car, in my kind of like emergency kit in each of my cars, and also in my purse just to have on hand because tummy aches can be a thing when out and on-the-go. Their lemon-ginger-honey flavored Stomach Settle drops contain not just one but three natural remedies for digestive upset, ginger, spearmint, and lemon. Plus, they contain vitamin B6 to help relieve occasional nausea, motion sickness, gas and bloating. Their ingredients are micronized, meaning that they provide faster-acting relief, and they have been really helpful, like I said, especially for motion sickness. They’re individually wrapped. They’re great for on-the-go, and I was able to negotiate a discount just for you. You can check this out at upspringbaby.com/pages/wellnessmama, and the code wellness10 saves you 10%.

This podcast is sponsored by BLUblox. That’s B-L-U-B-L-O-X, which is an advanced light-filtering eyewear company. You’ve probably seen pictures of me on social media wearing orange glasses of various types at night. And here’s why. In nature, we aren’t exposed to certain types of light after dark, specifically, blue light, because that type of light signals the body that it’s daytime. That in turn suppresses melatonin and can interfere with sleep. This is the reason that a really dramatic study found that camping for seven days straight with no artificial light at all could actually completely reset and heal circadian rhythm and help a lot of light-related problems, like seasonal affective disorder. This is also the reason that I wear orange glasses after dark to block these types of light and protect my sleep, which I am adamant about protecting. I also wear certain types of yellow glasses and anti-fatigue glasses during the day if I want a computer to reduce eye fatigue. BLUblox has orange glasses and yellow glasses. Their orange glasses for nighttime wear are designed to block 100% of the wavelengths between 400 nanometers and 550 nanometers, which are the ones that are studied to interfere with sleep and melatonin production, and circadian rhythm. My kids also wear these kinds of glasses at night. And I noticed a difference in their sleep as well, which is a huge win for a mom. This is especially important when we’re watching a family movie at night or looking at any kind of screen as the artificial light, there is a source of blue light and can interfere with sleep. You can learn more, they have a ton of educational content and check out all of their innovative protective glasses by going to blublox.com/wellnessmama and using the code wellnessmama to save 15%.

Katie: Hello, and welcome to the Wellness Mama Podcast. I’m Katie from wellnessmama.com. And this episode is with one of my good friends on a topic that I think is increasingly important, especially for women, and that is salt intake. Because we haven’t gotten the correct story. And limiting sodium, especially in certain scenarios, can actually be a little bit harmful. So, I’m here with Robb Wolf, who is a former research biochemist. He’s a health expert and author of the New York Times Best Sellers “The Paleo Solution” and “Wired to Eat”. He’s been the review editor for the “Journal of Nutrition and Metabolism” and the “Journal of Evolutionary Health”. He serves on the Board of Directors of Specialty Health Medical Clinic in Reno, Nevada and as a consultant in the Naval Special Warfare Resilience Program. He is a former California State Powerlifting Champion and is a purple belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. He is extremely active and has been researching areas like low carbon keto dieting and sodium intake for a really long time. And he goes really deep on the science of this, and the practical applications of why women, especially potentially pregnant and breastfeeding women, might need a lot more sodium than we’re being told that we need. Really fascinating episode. I know that you will enjoy it as much as I enjoyed recording it. So without further ado, let’s join Robb. Robb, welcome. Thanks for being here.

Robb: Hey, huge honor to be here. Always glad to bring down property values.

Katie: Oh, well, you are so much fun to talk to. And you are an expert in a topic that I’ve been reading quite a bit about recently, which is all things related to salt and sodium intake. So I feel like to start broad, a lot of people are aware that salt has gotten kind of a bad reputation. And people are often told to limit or avoid sodium, especially added sodium. So I want to start with that concept that a lot of people seem to think we should be limiting sodium. Is that what we’re actually seeing in the data right now?

Robb: Well, it’s really interesting because when we look at the problems that folks face like cancer is a big deal, autoimmunity is a big deal, but arguably the biggest problem that folks face is cardiovascular disease. And when we start, you know, unpacking that problem, cholesterol plays a really central role in at least that discussion, to what degree it plays a factor in it is super contentious. But one thing that is really well established is that folks with hypertension, with high blood pressure, they definitely are at elevated risk for cardiovascular disease, either a stroke or a heart attack. And this elevated blood pressure is arguably a feature of what’s causing damage to the vascular endothelium.

And what’s interesting is a driver of elevated blood pressure is sodium. But what’s kind of challenging to unpack in that story is over the last 30, 40 years when folks have been put on low sodium diets and we have great randomized control trials on this, like very rigorous science, they will take folks and put them on an extremely low sodium diet and it doesn’t really change their blood pressure much. In some people it does. There are these folks that are sodium sensitive, hypertensive. And in these people we can see a decent kind of up or downtick in their blood pressure based off of what their relative sodium intake is. But this is less than 1% of the population.

So it’s interesting, we know mechanistically, that sodium is important in blood pressure, we know that blood pressure is important for cardiovascular disease. But what got missed in that story is that the reason why the body hangs on to this sodium in the first place is we’re just generally over-eating and maybe over-eating too many carbs. And when our insulin levels elevate, when we become insulin resistant, then we tend to retain sodium. Insulin causes an upregulation in the production of a hormone called aldosterone. Aldosterone causes the kidneys to retain sodium. And so it’s interesting because there is a reason to be concerned about sodium and blood pressure, but it’s not really the way that we’ve been looking at things.

And this is also the flip side when people go on a lower carb diet, whether it’s paleo or keto, or what have you. One of the primary features that we see with that is that people tend to lose a lot of weight very quickly. And this is water weight. And this is the body shifting from really strongly retaining sodium to releasing a lot of sodium. And that’s good from the perspective of improving our cardiovascular risk profile and just generally feeling better. But if that goes too far, if somebody is on a low carb ketogenic diet and particularly if they’re active, what we then need to do is supplement sodium to get them back up to a normal baseline.

And so just in really broad brushstrokes, I think that that’s a big part of the maybe mischaracterization of sodium. And then the other piece is that if we look at eating mainly whole unprocessed foods, there’s not a lot of sodium there other than what we might add to it. But the place that we do get a lot of sodium is from processed foods. And in any way that you cut it highly processed foods are clearly not good for folks. And so I think that to some degree, there’s been both a misunderstanding of the mechanisms of where sodium is problematic, which is mainly elevated insulin levels, but then also guilt by association because sodium tends to go along with processed foods. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that adding sodium to an otherwise healthy diet is going to be similarly problematic.

Katie: So what are we actually seeing in the research based on what you’ve read of how much sodium do we actually need? And I would guess that would vary based on a lot of factors like how active someone is, for instance, or like you said, how much processed foods they’re eating or how many carbs they’re consuming, but are there any general rules of what the data says we actually do need?

Robb: Yeah, yeah, that’s a really good question. And there was a paper that was published three years ago, I want to say, two, three years ago where they looked at sodium intake and all-cause mortality in type 2 diabetic heart patients. So these were the folks that you would make the case that if a low sodium intake was going to benefit these folks and anyone, it should be these people. But what was interesting is what emerged out of this research is what’s called a U-curve. And if on the X axis, the bottom axis, we have amount of sodium consumed, and then on the Y axis, the up and down axis, morbidity and mortality, what we found in this study was that the folks that were consuming 2 or fewer grams of sodium per day had very high morbidity, mortality and this is at or below the levels that most medical professionals recommend. They generally recommend the lower the sodium, the better.

But what was interesting is, as folks in this sick population increased sodium intake out to about 5 grams, that was the lowest of all-cause mortality. So 2 grams was quite dangerous, 5 grams was far less dangerous. And then it was interesting, you had to get all the way out to almost 8 to 10 grams of sodium to have the same morbidity and mortality rates as folks consuming 2 grams of sodium. So what you take from that is that low sodium intake is far more dangerous than high sodium intake in general. And so that 5 grams per day is a pretty defensible place to just start the conversation around, you know, this is probably a safe level to consume, and it’s worth noting, there are some high sodium cultures around the world like Japan and some other places that their average intake is around 10 to 11 grams a day. So it’s significantly higher even than what we’re consuming and they tend to have fewer health problems.

But that’s maybe a way to think about bracketing the low end, you know, somewhere around maybe 4 to 5 grams a day. And again, to your point, depending on activity level and the size of the person and stuff like that, that’s going to dramatically influence the amount of not just sodium but potassium and magnesium and the other electrolytes that we’re concerned with. But it’s interesting if we kind of focus on sodium, a lot of these other things tend to fall into place. But then when we look over at sports medicine, the American Council of Sports Medicine, ACSM, they have some guidelines that depending on the temperature, the humidity, the activity level of an individual, their recommendation start at 7 to 10 grams of sodium per day for folks that are in warm environments, humid environments, or are highly active.

And just kind of anecdotally within the keto scene, Ketogains, folks that I’ve worked with, we’ve seen high motor athletes that are low carb get up as high as 12 to 15 grams of sodium on some very active days. But these are folks that are, say, like doing 3 hours of Brazilian jujitsu and their facility is not air conditioned, and it’s 90 degrees and 80% humidity and stuff like that. But it’s interesting. We haven’t really seen benefit much above that 12 to 15 gram per day level, even in extremely active large individuals. And then we do see, you know, a good case to be made that somewhere around that 4 to 5 grams per day intake levels should be consistent with good health.

Katie: And what are some things that we can look out for? Are there symptoms associated with not consuming enough or with consuming too much? Or how can we gauge individually how much we probably need?

Robb: Yeah, yeah, it’s a really good question. And it’s interesting because blood work doesn’t help us much in this case because the kidneys do a remarkably good job of dealing with different electrolyte levels. And so, folks oftentimes ask if there’s blood work that can be done and if somebody is overtly deficient in like sodium or magnesium or potassium. That can show up but it’s difficult to pin that stuff down from a lab perspective. So we have to go with much more subjective elements: how do you feel, cognition. Some of the common things that people report when they eat lower carb or just in general if they’re lacking in sodium, one of the most common problems is folks will go from sitting to standing, and upon standing, they will get lightheaded, and that’s a really good indicator that the individual needs more sodium.

If they’re feeling lightheaded or kind of dizzy while exercising, that’s oftentimes a pretty good indicator that they need more sodium. Mental fatigue, lethargy, these are pretty common signs of needing more sodium and electrolytes in general. But then the when have you gone too far question? Usually we see a little bit of gastric upset like possibly some disaster pants type stuff, but if folks have to get really aggressive on the supplementation for that to happen, if they kind of sip on their bone broth or their electrolyte beverage or what have you, or if they’re just kind of salting food, that’s usually not a problem.

Katie: Gotcha. Okay. So you’ve mentioned other electrolytes, specifically magnesium and potassium. And I know some people are also concerned with getting enough calcium. Are there any general rules of what sort of ratio we need these in or how to know when we need other electrolytes as well?

Robb: Yeah, it’s a really good question, and the way that we tackle this, we looked at well formulated whole food diets, and looked at the amounts of calcium, magnesium, potassium, and sodium that these largely whole unprocessed food diets provided. And what we found is that they adequately tick the box typically on calcium. They ended up being pretty good but not quite sufficient on magnesium and potassium and then they were quite deficient in sodium. And again, these numbers kind of vary from person to person. We should throughout the course of a day generally consume more potassium than sodium. Virtually all foods unless they’re like fermented and having sodium added to them will typically be much higher in potassium than sodium.

So, again, if we mainly stick with nuts, seeds, fruits, vegetables, meat, shellfish, that type of stuff, the ratios kind of play out pretty naturally, the amounts and ratios, but the one thing that we tend to be a little bit deficient in and that will range from person to person tends to be the sodium.

Katie: Gotcha. Okay, that makes sense. And basically just to recap, so if we all have a baseline need for a certain amount of sodium, but that can definitely increase with things like exercise, being low carb, I would guess sauna use, what about are there any hormonal considerations there? Like, for instance, do women need more sodium at different points during their cycle or during, for instance, pregnancy or breastfeeding?

Robb: You know, interestingly, I don’t know for sure about the specifics around pregnancy, but we actually have a study that’s underway at Vanderbilt looking at sodium supplementation using LMNT and breast milk production. Just anecdotally, we had a just wildfire of folks tagging us on social media. And it was within these kind of breastfeeding mom forums and gals would post like, “This was yesterday’s pump, and it was like a bottle with just a scant amount in it. And then the next day it was three or four full bottles.” And this was striking enough that it got the attention of the Dean of the School of epidemiology at Vanderbilt, she’s an MD PhD, got her attention enough that she was interested in doing a women’s health study around this.

And so this is underway right now. And so it’s difficult to say exactly what those levels are outside of just overlaying what our basic needs are, which is probably somewhere between 5 and 10 grams per day. But it mechanistically it makes a lot of sense that it would help breast milk production because it will increase fluid volume supplementing with sodium. It will encourage you to drink more fluids in general. And interestingly, when we look at some of the functional medicine remedies for, say, adrenal fatigue, HPTA axis dysregulation, increased sodium intake is very helpful because it does downregulate aldosterone. And when aldosterone is produced, it tends to release both epinephrine which is adrenaline and also cortisol. And epinephrine and cortisol are antagonistic towards the production of breast milk.

So, you know, again, I think that one could make the case that just generally sticking within the bounds of what we would consider normal intake, which is somewhere around that, like 5 to 10 gram per day level is probably optimum, but you could definitely make a case that in general a really low sodium diet during pregnancy is probably not a good idea. I guess one problem area would be gestational diabetes and some of the kind of hypertensive state that can occur with that. But you could also really make the case that this is again probably an insulin-driven phenomenon. I don’t know if you’ve had Lily Nichols on the show, but she’s the genius with this stuff. She’s really phenomenal in helping to deal with that gestational diabetes and the preeclampsia and things like that.

Katie: I have not had her on, but I’ll have to add her to the list.

Robb: Oh, she’s amazing. She is amazing.

Katie: That’s really interesting to know. I’d love to understand a little bit more. You mentioned the HPA axis dysfunction. Can you explain for anyone not familiar what that is and why sodium could be a remedy there?

Robb: Yeah, so the HPTA axis…it’s kind of funny within mainstream medical circles, people will scoff at the term adrenal fatigue and this is something that has been in kind of alternative or functional medicine circles for, I don’t know, 30 years, 40 years, perhaps even longer than that. And it’s this kind of complex of symptoms. It’s burnout. You have low energy, tend to be very tired and lethargic in the morning, and tend to wake up more just about the time that you’re ready to go to bed. We now understand that there’s some elements of flipped circadian biology going on there. But the thought was that in that whole Hans Selye general adaptation to stress response theory, was that if an organism is exposed to chronic stress above what they can adapt to, that the adrenals will eventually kind of poop out and they’ll be incapable of producing cortisol.

And over the course of time, what’s really fascinating about this is the specific mechanism of the adrenals failing to produce cortisol is not accurate, but the symptomology of people just being sick is, and so you will find doctors that will argue to their death that adrenal fatigue is a non-thing. But then if you say, “Well, what do you think about hypothalamus pituitary adrenal axis dysregulation?” They will say, “Oh, yeah, well, that’s absolutely a problem.” And they will describe all the symptomology being identical to what we usually…like alternative practitioners have called adrenal fatigue. So it’s kind of an interesting thing where people identified the problem, they had a proposed mechanism of the problem, which didn’t entirely end up being accurate, but it’s still a significant problem that people face.

And the way that sodium helps in that scenario, is that it tends to blunt the kind of cortisol production that is associated with that kind of hyper vigilant and overstimulated, overstressed state. And it’s one of a multitude of things that folks will recommend in the course of helping to improve that adrenal fatigue or HPTA axis dysregulation. But usually that burnout is caused by lack of sleep, either exercising too much, or really chronic stress, a traumatic event. So like PTSD and also traumatic brain injury has a lot of overlap in its HPTA axis kind of arena. There’s a variety of interventions from cognitive behavioral therapy to adaptogens like Schizandra and other remedies, but also sodium ends up playing a really important role in just kind of establishing that baseline for folks.

Katie: That makes sense. For me, I noticed a big difference. I think I’ve probably had a lot of those symptoms a couple of years ago for a burnout and I had to address sleep, and also morning sunlight helped my levels a lot getting outside in the morning. But vitamin C and sodium were both big factors for me in over time regulating that. So I think that’s really, really wise advice. And you’ve mentioned LMNT, but I know we haven’t really explained what that is yet and I would love for you to talk about that. Because I know you have your own story involving learning how much sodium your body needed. And you realized this was a big enough problem that you actually developed a product to help solve it. So talk to us about LMNT.

Robb: Yeah, so you know, in theory, and I hate the term expert, but in theory, I’m fairly well versed in ketogenic diets. I’m a biochemist by training and all that stuff. And I’ve largely eaten this way for about 22 years and generally motored along really, really well, but I do some Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and what I found difficult was fueling the more frisky jujitsu sessions on a low carb diet, and I found that I would need to introduce a little bit more carbs, but then when I titrated carbs up, I didn’t feel as good cognitively. And I just felt kind of stuck in this cul de sac. And then I met Luis Villasenor and Tyler Cartwright. They’re the founders of the Ketogains program. It’s an online ketogenic boot camp and I started kind of stalking those guys and their results are just amazing.

They do a phenomenal job with people and they’re really wonderful coaches. And I managed to weasel my way into their lives and told them what I was up to. And, you know, ask them, “Okay, looking at what I’m doing, here’s my macros. Here’s what I’m up to on my training. What else do I need to do to make things work better?” And they just immediately they said, “You need more sodium.” And I was like, “Oh, no, I salt my food. I’m good.” And like people will have a tendency to do when your coach tells you to do something, you ignore it for a good long time. And so about a year went by and these guys patiently kept saying you just need more sodium, just need more sodium, and then I finally listened to them.

And Luis made the point, he’s like, “Hey, why don’t you weigh and measure and put into Cronometer?” It’s this food logging app. “Everything that you eat, everything that you supplement, and let’s see what your real sodium intake levels are.” And my real sodium intake was below 2 grams a day. So even though I felt like I was salting my food, like I just I wasn’t doing remotely a good enough job. And so initially, I was just salting bone broth and then I was making some homebrews of lemon juice and magnesium citrate and light salt and regular salt. And it was just a miracle. Like, it changed my performance. It improved my sleep. I got leaner. And the only thing that I was doing was improving my sodium intake. And so this was a good three years ago, if not a little bit longer at this point.

And so these guys had already known that sodium was super important and they had been beating the drum on this for a good long time. And so I started really championing this idea around electrolytes, in particular sodium and we actually posted a make-it at home recipe, like use this much table salt, this much no salt, this much, you know, like magnesium citrate or magnesium glycinate, or something like that. Mix it all together, use some stevia and there you go. And this thing just had a stunning number of downloads. Like people loved it. It helped them. But then we started getting tagged on social media posts where it was like, “Hey, Robb, Tyler, and Luis, I was going through TSA today and they didn’t like my three bags of white powder, LOL.”

And so we started kind of putting our heads together and asking would it make sense to do some sort of a convenience product around this, because trucking, you know, white powders around and mixing it and everything is not all that convenient. And we started investigating kind of the feasibility around it and I had a suspicion it would either do really well or just like die like a plane into a mountainside. And so far it’s done really well. And I think part of the reason for that is when people are deficient in electrolytes in particular sodium, when they fix that they feel better really quickly. I mean, within 5 or 10 minutes, it’s a night and day kind of game changer experience. So we’ve had a remarkable amount of buy-in from police, military, fire, new moms, keto advocates, like it’s been really broad and very interesting the variety of people that have been jumping in and giving it a shot and really seeming to benefit from it.

Katie: Yeah, I’m definitely a fan, especially within the last couple of years I spend about 45 minutes a day usually in the sauna. And I notice now if I don’t get enough sodium I have to be very conscious of it because that is quite a bit of sweat and plus I’m now also working out and so I’ve had to start really paying attention to that, and you’re right, it’s amazing. Like I’ve had mornings where I get kind of like a headache and I just feel tired and then as soon as I get my sodium levels up, I feel so much better without even needing caffeine as much.

Robb: Let me ask you this and I want to do it in a non…I try to do it in a non-leading way, do you ever notice different times when LMNT tastes more or less salty?

Katie: Yeah, actually. That’s interesting. I’m drinking it right now. I’m drinking the orange one and it tastes less salty than it will sometimes after like a really intense sauna or exercise.

Robb: So it tastes more salty for you when you sauna or exercise?

Katie: Mm-hmm. Typically.

Robb: Interesting, because we’ve had people report the opposite and so I was trying to figure out if this was a way of dialing in dose where like if your body really needed sodium, maybe you wouldn’t taste it. And then as you started getting enough then you wouldn’t taste it but I guess you could argue that on the flip side of that too, that this was… Sodium is interesting. It’s the only kind of micro nutrient that we have a specific flavor for. Like, we don’t really taste magnesium or potassium or calcium or anything. Like they do have a taste but like one chunk of a whole flavor repertoire is salty. And so I was just curious if there were times where the same concentration, the same mix, like it might feel or taste particularly salty one moment but then, you know, virtually not salty the next.

Katie: That is really fascinating. Yeah, I’d be curious to know as you guys hear from more people if that ends up being the case. What about kids and sodium intake? Because I know you have two daughters and I have kids as well. I know that LMNT can be a great alternative for sports drinks. And I definitely don’t advocate giving children traditional sports drinks that have all kinds of dyes and sugars in them. But are there any guidelines that we know of for how much sodium kids need, especially if they’re active?

Robb: Generally, you just kind of adjust based off of size. And so, like Zoey is 7 years old and what we’ll do is we’ll take one LMNT, which is 1000 milligrams of sodium, 200 milligrams potassium, 60 milligrams of magnesium, put that in about 2 liters, and then split it between the two of them. And then they will sip on that throughout the course of a really active day. Like they’ve been going to Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and they get after it like they’re hot and sweaty, and largely just kind of let them self-regulate on that because I will ask them, “Hey, do you want water or do you want electrolytes?” And sometimes they are like, “Dad, I really want water,” and then other times are like, “Man, I really want electrolytes?” I just kind of give them the option there and then let them kind of self-regulate in that way. But we also mix things in a fairly hypotonic solution. It’s not super concentrated.

Katie: Got it. Yeah. And I think that’s…especially with kids, they seem to be very intuitive for the most part about what they need, especially when we’re not talking about drinks that have added sugars that are going to…the body’s going to respond to those in a different way. I feel like that could kind of skew their response to the sodium if they’re also getting sugar and things that are in a lot of the popular sports drinks. But we kind of do the same with our kids and we don’t have…ours don’t do jujitsu anymore but they’re doing pole vaulting. So same thing, they’re very active and very sweaty and they definitely tell me when they crave it, which I thought was interesting. So

So we’ve talked about low carb and keto diets in relation to sodium intake. But this is an area that I know you’ve also done a lot of research. And so I’d love to talk a little bit about that in general as well because these are obviously very popular right now. And there is a little bit of controversy, especially for women if women should be on a low carb or keto diet or not. So I’d love to start there with your take on is the keto or low carb diet safe for women and do we need to adapt it in any way?

Robb: Yeah, it’s interesting and it’s a really controversial topic and I��ve kind of modified my position over time in that I think there are fewer and fewer people for whom a low carb diet isn’t probably a good idea either transiently through the year or as we get older. And the challenges that usually emerge for women in particular with low carb or ketogenic diet is there’s kind of a camp in the ketogenic community that’s almost protein phobic. They’re so focused on producing ketones. They get very, very fat centric, and there’s a concept called the protein leverage hypothesis that puts this idea forward that if we don’t eat enough protein, we will continue to overeat other calories, and it doesn’t matter if you’re low carb or you’re low fat.

And it makes a lot of sense and it kind of explains a lot of what we see where some folks do pretty high protein and low fat, high carb, they do pretty well. Folks that do pretty high protein, low carb, higher fat, they do pretty well. But this middle ground of like low protein and lots of fat and lots of carbs seems to be an absolute disaster. And so, one of the things that we see happen with women is that they will tend to under-eat too much, even though maybe they’re trying to lean out. And then they’re also really under-eating protein. And this can cause stress on the body, it will cause people to overeat. So trying to get that little bit of caloric deficit becomes really, really difficult.

And then the other piece to this is that most of what people ascribe to like adrenal issues, thyroid issues around low carb diets, you could also make the case that inadequate sodium causes the same problems. And so, is it a low carb problem or is it a lack of electrolytes while being low carb that’s really the problem? And one of the things that I kind of default back to is looking at the Ketogains community. These guys have like 150,000, 160,000-person Facebook group, really robust community, but it’s about 70% women, and their demographic is like 35 to 55.

And these gals are just crushing it. Like there’s not loads of people with their hair falling out and they have this problem, and that problem, but they’re very good at making sure that protein is on point and that electrolytes are on point. So I know it’s very anecdotal to point to the Ketogains community and say, “Well, here is people succeeding, you know, this is validation,” but I think it kind of speaks to the potential mechanisms of where the Ketogains folks do a really good job getting things right and then where people can get it wrong and how that could negatively impact female hormones in particular.

Katie: That makes sense. And speaking from my own experience, that is something I noticed as well, those were important factors to get dialed in. And I wouldn’t say I’m by any means keto all of the time. I cycle everything. So I do eat carbs but just not every day. I’m a big fan of not doing anything every single day. But in general, I would say I probably still eat much lower carb than most people, especially anyone on the standard American diet. But I’ve lost a substantial amount of weight in the last year, I think it’s actually close to 80 pounds now. And for me big factors in that where I really had to ramp up protein and be conscious of it. In fact, I was consuming for a long time more protein than I thought I needed.

Like I had to really make an effort to get enough calories and get enough protein in and also the sodium was a big key for me, especially because I was using the sauna quite a bit during the weight loss. I wasn’t exercising during the weight loss, but now I am. And so I found it interesting that with focusing on protein and sodium and being really cognizant of those when I went back to working out, I was able to, for instance, deadlift my bodyweight easily on my first try having not worked out for a year. I think probably protein played a big role in that, obviously, because I was hopefully not losing too much muscle as I was losing the fat.

But you’re right. I think a lot of women are really afraid of protein. Are there any guidelines you would give of a good target of how much protein to aim for?

Robb: Yeah, so the kind of benchmarks are literally never below 0.8 grams of protein per pound of lean body mass. Like unless you’re doing something for like a specific therapeutic scenario like cancer treatment or something like that, like outside of some really specific guidelines like that, like a 0.8 grams of protein per pound of lean body mass, you never want to go below that. And we tend to see people do better at about a gram to 1.2 grams of protein per pound of lean body mass. And if calculating that ends up being kind of onerous. A pretty simple way to go is to just try to eat a gram of protein per pound of body weight. And most people will fail in that. But in the attempt of doing it, what they will generally end up doing is eating fewer calories overall because that protein is so satiating, they will tend to reduce their overall caloric intake.

Katie: Got it. Okay, that makes sense. And, you talk about this and I know we did a podcast episode much more about it, I’ll link to in the show notes about “Wired to Eat”. But you talk about this in your book quite a bit as well. And I just thought that was a really interesting point because I now even during weight loss, ate so much more food than I probably was before, that it was not just about reducing calories at all. It was about making sure that I was really cognizant of my macros and where the calories were coming from. But can you go a little bit deeper on that and kind of explain that concept that you go deep on in “Wired to Eat”?

Robb: Yeah, I mean, “Wired to Eat” was really an unpacking of kind of two things. One is the neuroregulation of appetite and how it’s our brain that is really driving the boat on when we are hungry and when we are not. And it’s not just a matter of sticking something in our belly, and that different foods affect folks differently. And this is particularly true on the carbohydrate side where some people like my wife, Nikki, she has phenomenal carb tolerance. What’s interesting is, if Nikki and I sit down and eat, say, like a cup of cooked white rice, her blood sugar will top off about 110 to 115. That’s as high as it’ll get. And at two hours, it’s back down to its fasting baseline.

My blood sugar will get up near diabetic range, it’s like 190, 200. I will have vision problems, I feel terrible. And then when I crash after that, I’m just ravenously hungry. And so what’s interesting and something that is oftentimes just about universally missed is that the folks who do well on high carb diets have blood glucose responses that look like the rest of us on low carb diets. It’s not that they are magically immune to like really huge blood sugar highs and lows, it’s that their body is so efficient at dealing with things they never experience those highs and lows.

And Nikki is interesting in that she will go in and out of ketosis. She doesn’t feel better or worse, one way or the other, whether she’s eating carbs or not, whereas I notice a really, really significant difference being lower carb. And so what that tells me is Nikki is likely much more metabolically flexible than I am. There’s things that I can do like a little bit of fasting, lifting weights, and carb cycling to try to improve that but there’s just kind of a reality that either genetically or epigenetically Nikki is far, far better than I am at dealing with carbs. And so those are kind of the two interwoven features that we really explore in Wired to Eat and use to help inform choices.

Like what are the foods that we’re choosing that for us cause the best satiety, the best ability to eat at the level that is necessary for us? And then, you know, what’s our individual response to foods both with regards to glycemic load and then also potentially immunogenic foods? I don’t do well with wheat or gluten at all. It crushes me pretty badly. And some people don’t do well with Nightshade. Some people don’t do well with eggs. And so we do a little exploration both on the glycemic response, the blood sugar response, but then also kind of the immunogenic response, the potential kind of food intolerances and allergenic type responses that folks have to various foods.

Katie: Yeah, I think there definitely must be a genetic component to that. So you mentioned a few things you can do that hopefully help improve your glycemic response. So I hear from a number of people who eat what would be actually a relatively low carb diet and still will have a higher than they’d like fasting glucose in the morning. Are those things potentially helpful for people like that?

Robb: So in that scenario, there’s this thing called the dawn phenomenon, which in the morning, we have elevated cortisol levels and cortisol will tend to elevate blood glucose levels. What’s important to look at in that scenario is the hemoglobin A1C. A1C is a measure of the average blood glucose over time, not just that singular snapshot. And most of the time, what we find is that the folks who have that, they’re eating low carb, they have what appears to be elevated blood glucose in the morning, but that’s the only time of the day that their blood glucose is elevated if their A1C is low. If both fasting blood glucose is elevated and A1C is elevated, then we have another problem and not infrequently it may be that they don’t have electrolytes on point, which can be a stress that produces cortisol, that elevates blood glucose levels.

Could also be an immunogenic food. Like if they’re eating low carb cheese and dairy are really delicious, really handy on low carb, but they are also really common allergens and folks can experience elevated blood glucose when they get kind of an immune response to foods. But the thing to do is to check that A1C and you can go to your doctor, or you could get that from like a local pharmacy to check your A1C. It’s just a finger prick test in that case. And if the A1C looks good, not really something to worry about. If the A1C is on the higher side, which anything above 5 starts getting me a little bit concerned. I’d like to see it at 5 or below on the A1C, then we can look at sodium, we could look at are you under-eating? Do we have an immunogenic food? Is there a sleep disturbance going on that is causing this other problem?

Katie: Okay, got it. That makes sense. And I want to loop back just to the sodium thing and talk a little bit more about LMNT where people can find it. Of course, the links will be in the show notes. But it’s made a big difference for me. And it’s so much easier than, like you said, trying to mix your own or carry the ingredients for that. And my kids like the taste of the flavored ones as well, which is another plus. But just for anyone who’s listening, let us know where we can find it. And of course, the links will be in the show notes at wellnessmama.fm as well.

Robb: Yeah, yeah. DrinkLMNT.com is where the main site is and we have a great science and resource section there. So like if you want to dig into some of the science and research that kind of supports what we’re suggesting, then we have some great resources there. And then I think all of the social media stuff. It’s, you know, @DrinkLMNT on Twitter and Instagram and Facebook and all that stuff.

Katie: Got it. Awesome. Well, Robb, this is really fun round two. We might have to do a round three one day. It’s always such a pleasure to talk to you. But thanks for all the work that you’re doing in this area and for sharing today.

Robb: Same Katie. I look forward to seeing you in real life. Hopefully we both dodge the coronavirus and we can see each other soon.

Katie: Yes, absolutely. And please tell your family hi for me.

Robb: Will do. Take care.

Katie: Thank you. And thanks to all of you for listening as always and for sharing one of your most valuable assets, your time with us today. We’re both so grateful that you did and I hope that you will join me again on the next episode of “The Wellness Mama Podcast.”

If you’re enjoying these interviews, would you please take two minutes to leave a rating or review on iTunes for me? Doing this helps more people to find the podcast, which means even more moms and families could benefit from the information. I really appreciate your time, and thanks as always for listening.

Source: https://wellnessmama.com/podcast/wired-to-eat/

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this-book-has-been-loved · 7 years

Text

Singularity: Chapter 8

AU where instead of landing in the trash nebula, Pidge finds herself on the same planet as a certain Galra prison camp.

(Holt family reunion fic; no romantic relationships)

Read it on Ao3

Read it on FFN

Part III: Stardust Chapter 8: Beings

Something inside her had broken.

After their rescue mission to Serva had failed, the atmosphere in the castle had gone somber. They felt like they were waiting—for what, they didn’t know. But the tension hung in the air, leaving a distinctly unfinished tinge.

After nearly a quintant-and-a-half of everyone avoiding the topic, Pidge firmly pushed it out of her thoughts.

Stay distracted, she recited. Keep yourself focused on other things. Put it out of your mind. Don’t think about it.

And so she did what she best: buried her feelings and got to work on whatever tech-related problem needed her attention.

Taking a moment to steel herself, she knocked on Shiro’s door.

“Come in.”

The door slid open, and Shiro stood up a bit straighter at seeing her. “Pidge?”

“Keith told me there were some coordinates or something encoded in your arm,” she said, jumping straight to the point. “Should we take a look at that?”

He paused, glancing down at his prosthetic and then back to her. “That…can wait. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” she snapped. She took a deep shaky breath, steadying herself. “The best thing we can do for my family is to take down the Galra empire,” she continued softly, looking down at the floor. “And if the next step to that is finding some mysterious coordinates programmed into your arm, then that’s what we should do.” She met his gaze, and they stared at one another for a moment.

Shiro exhaled and nodded once. “Okay. Let’s get everyone else.”

The days passed in a blur. The traveled from Thaldecon to Olkarion to Taujeer to the Unilu swap moon/space mall—constantly hopping throughout the galaxies. When she wasn’t fighting, she was working. Upgrading the cloaking for her lion, trying to see if she could equip her podship with the cloaking (unfortunately she couldn’t seem to figure out how to integrate it into her armor), studying the inner workings of the castle, decryption of all the data downloads (and partial downloads) they’d been collecting, reading through and analyzing and taking notes on any data she could get her hands on….

She wasn’t sleeping as much. Her brain tended to run wild at night, bringing back painful memories she’d rather not relive. No—it was easier to stay awake, to keep busy, to pour herself into her work.

And now, finally, they’d made it to the Blade of Marmora’s headquarters.

Where she was stuck with nothing to do for two days while Shiro and Keith spoke with the Galra rebels.

She sat in her chair in the bridge, her fingers holding tight to the seat. “I wish I was in there,” she muttered. “Whatever’s going on in there has gotta be way more exciting than just sitting here and waiting.” Her leg was bouncing impatiently; distantly, she wondered how long that had been going on. “This is agonizing.”

“I don’t know if I’d say agonizing,” Lance called from where he was sprawled out in his own chair. “Kinda nice getting to relax for once.”

“Mm, I’m gonna have to agree with Pidge on this one,” Hunk said. “I’d kind of like to know what’s going on rather than just…speculating.”

“I wanted to meet them,” Pidge said, more to herself than to the others in the room. “If they have double agents or whatever infiltrating Zarkon’s ranks, I want to talk to them.” She pulled her legs up into her chair and hugged them to her chest. “They might be able to give me some answers.”

“Well, it’s going to be a while before we hear anything back from them,” Coran said, chipper as always. “So we’ll just have to wait until then.”

Pidge let out a scream of frustration, curling further into herself. “I. Hate. WAITING.”

“Easy there, Pigeon,” Lance told her, sitting up. “Come on, I’m sure we can find something to do to pass the time.”

Hunk lit up. “Oh hey, that reminds me! I think I may have found a way to hook up that video game you guys bought back at that space mall!”

Lance brightened considerably at that. “Hunk, have I told you recently how much I love you?”

Hunk grinned, shrugging nonchalantly. “You could afford to say it more.”

Allura sighed, tapping at her display screen. “Well, while you go do that, Coran and I will stay here and monitor the base. Be on alert in case something goes wrong.”

Lance saluted as he sauntered across the bridge. “You got it, Princess.” He stopped by Pidge’s chair, where she was still resting her forehead on her knees and grumbling to herself. He crouched down beside her, gently prodding her side. “Hey Pidge. Pigeon. Pidgey. Pidgeroo. Pidge-asaurus. Pidgeotto.”

“What, Lance?” she snapped

“Ya wanna go play some Mercury Gameflux Two?”

She sighed, relenting, letting him drag her out of her chair. “Yeah. I could use some mindless video games right about now.”

Lance had crashed.

After several hours of gameplay and complaining (“Come on, Pidge, winning’s not winning when your opponent doesn’t have their heart in it.”), he had passed out on the lounge’s sofa, the mice curled up on his chest, leaving Pidge and Hunk alone.

Halfway through their third round together, Hunk pressed the pause button.

Pidge almost didn’t notice at first, just kept pressing buttons. Confused, she turned to Hunk, to find him watching her in concern. “Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked.

She rolled her eyes, turning back to the paused game. “Peachy.”

Hunk sighed. “Pidge, I’m going to be honest with you. You haven’t been the same since Serva. It’s been over a week. Don’t think we haven’t all noticed. You’re barely eating. You haven’t been sleeping. You’re overworking yourself, Katie.” At the use of her birth name, she stilled, and her hands clenched. “We’re worried about you,” Hunk continued, reaching out to rest a hand on her back. “We all are.”

She flinched away from his touch, and her grip tightened on the controller. Her hands were shaking. “I don’t need your pity,” she muttered. “Can we—can we just go back to the game now?”

“Pidge, please—”

She let out a frustrated yell, throwing her controller to the ground. “No! I am sick and tired of everyone treating me like I’m so…so…fragile!! I’m not going to break!” She took a deep breath, collecting herself. “I’m…I’m fine.” Her voice broke. “I’m going to be fine.”

He was silent for a moment, then carefully reached out to her again. He placed his hand on her back, and this time she let him. “You know…it’s okay to not be fine.”

“You don’t understand,” she muttered.

“I’d like to.”

“I can take care of myself!”

“I know,” he said simply. “The thing is, Pidge…you don’t need to. You don’t have to do everything on your own. We’re all right here.”

“Ugh!” She buried her head in her hands. “You don’t understand,” she repeated, more desperately. “I have to be okay. I have to keep going. I can’t let this control me and get in the way of things. If we don’t stop Zarkon, then who will?” She was frantic, her voice rising in pitch with every word. “How else am I supposed to help them? I—how can I call myself a defender of the universe if I can barely hold myself together?! How can I be a Voltron paladin if I can’t even do that?!”

“Well of course you’re a paladin,” Hunk replied, as though it were the simplest thing. “Green chose you, Pidge. There’s no changing that. You’re the Green Paladin. But you know what else you are?”

“What?” she muttered.

“Human.”

At that, she looked up.

“You’re human, Pidge. You’re allowed to have feelings. You’re allowed to deal with those. You don’t have to keep pushing them away—pushing all of us away.”

The mice had stirred, abandoning Lance’s chest to instead curl up against her legs. She sighed, absently petting Platt’s head. “I know,” she murmured. “I just…I’m used to dealing with stuff myself, and….” She shrugged. “I’m tired.”

Hunk rubbed her back. “I think you need to get some rest.”

She shook her head weakly. “It’s worse then,” she whispered. “When my mind starts wandering. I need to stay focused. I…I can’t….”

He sighed, pulling her fully into his arms. “Alright,” he said. “Then stay here. Lance and I will keep you company.”

“Lance is asleep.”

“As you should be.”

She curled in on herself. “I can’t,” she said again. “Not…not yet. Can we just…go back to the game?”

He gave her an askance look. “Promise me you’ll tell us when something’s wrong?”

She nodded. “Promise.”

He smiled, reaching forward to pick up her controller and handing it back to her. “Alright. Thank you, Pidge.” He un-paused, and the game flickered back to life.

Pidge leaned up against him, resting her head against his chest. “Thank you, Hunk,” she told him firmly. “You’re the best.”

“Love you too, Katie.”

They met the Red Lion in its hangar.

Keith stumbled out of the cockpit, followed by Shiro and two other figures. And if Pidge thought Keith looked a bit worse for wear, she didn’t say anything. After briefly introducing them to their Galra companions, Keith and Shiro exchanged a meaningful glance.

“And…,” Keith seemed hesitant to add, “there’s something I need to tell you.”

Allura frowned. “What’s wrong? Keith, you look exhausted. What happened?”

Shiro put a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “That’s what we need to talk about,” he said. “Can we go somewhere else?”

The Princess sent a cold glance towards the Galra—Kolivan and Antok—then turned back to Shiro and Keith. “Of course. We should move to the bridge. Kolivan and Antok can wait for us in the conference room.”

“Keith, you look like you’re about to collapse,” Hunk said as they walked. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“‘M fine,” Keith mumbled. “Just…haven’t slept.”

“Dude, you realize that’s the exact same excuse Pidge uses, right?”

Pidge rolled her eyes. “Shut up,” she said, shoving Hunk lightly. “You mere mortals may need sleep. But Keith and I are of a higher calling.”

“A higher calling,” Lance repeated dryly.

“Mm-hmm.”

“Pidge, you live off coffee and spite.”

“Damn straight.”

Keith didn’t say anything. Instead, he waited until they’d made it to the bridge, with Kolivan and Antok waiting in the next room. With everyone’s attention on him, he took a deep breath. “A lot happened while we were at the Blade’s headquarters,” he started. With that, he delved into explanation, going over the knife he’d carried and the trials he’d faced, all culminating with the way his blade had awoken. “And Kolivan mentioned,” he finished, nearly stumbling over the words, “that…well, that would only be possible if…if Galra blood ran in my veins.”

He was met by silence.

After a long moment, Allura spoke, her voice chilling. “What?”

Keith winced, but it was Shiro who answered. “Keith is part Galra,” he repeated, placing a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “We don’t know how much, but that’s not important. We just thought that as part of this team, you all deserved to know.”

There was another pause. “If you’ll excuse me,” Allura said icily, “I should tend to our guests.”

She left the room without another word. With a stammered apology (“I—I’m sorry. I should talk to her….”), Coran had left only steps behind her. As for the rest of the team, none of them really knew how to respond.

Keith fidgeted anxiously. “Yeah,” he muttered. “That’s pretty much exactly the reaction I was expecting.” He pulled away from Shiro, stalking towards one of the other sets of doors leading out of the bridge.

“Wait,” Lance stammered. “Keith!”

But the Red Paladin had already stormed out of the bridge.

Shiro sighed. “Give him some space. In the meantime, we should talk with Kolivan and Antok about our next steps against Zarkon.”

She found him in the lounge.

Allura, Coran, Shiro, and Lance were on the bridge with Kolivan and Antok, discussing their plan for taking down the Galra Empire. Hunk had decided to take this opportunity to catch up on lost sleep. Pidge was tempted to join him, but instead found herself wandering the halls of the castle.

She didn’t realize she was looking for Keith until she walked in on him.

He was slouching on one of the sunken couches, arms crossed over his chest, as he glared out the window at the stars surrounding them.

She knew that he’d heard her enter; she noticed the way his eyes flickered towards the door, the way his posture tightened almost imperceptibly, as though he wanted nothing more than to run away and hide.

And he looked exhausted. As she came up to stand beside him, Pidge noticed the bags under his eyes, the way his shoulders sagged against the back of the couch, the bruises blossoming across his collarbone and disappearing into his shirt.

She stopped about a foot away from him, but he didn’t turn towards her. “Keith. Buddy. You should get some rest.”

He didn’t move. “I’m fine.”

She raised an eyebrow. Well, doesn’t that sound familiar. “No, you’re kinda not,” she told him. “If what you and Shiro told us is accurate, you’ve been on your feet fighting for nearly two days straight. You need to get some sleep.”

“Sleep is for the weak.”

“Keith, you haven’t slept in two days.”

He gave her a withering glance. “Like you’re really one to talk.”

She sighed, collapsing onto the sofa beside him. “Yeah, alright, fair enough.”

They fell into silence, tense and charged. The words hovered unspoken between them––neither of them wanting to make the first move.

After a moment that seemed to stretch on for eternity, Pidge took a deep breath. “Can we…can we talk? About the whole…Galra thing?”

He closed his eyes in resignation, somehow managing to curl up even further into himself, still stubbornly refusing to meet her gaze. “Pidge, I’m sorry—”

“No. Shut up.” He froze, surprised at her vehemence, and finally turned to meet her gaze. She bit her lip, trying to find the right words. “Just shut up and let me say things.” He motioned for her to continue and she nodded, steeling herself. “The Galra have taken everything from me,” she murmured, looking towards the starry expanse through the window. “My father…my brother…and just when I get him back they take him away again, and so they’re still just out of reach. I hate the Galra for all they’ve done to me.”

He turned his attention towards the floor. “Pidge, if you’re trying to cheer me up—”

“Let me finish,” she said, elbowing him playfully. “What I’m trying to get at here…is that’s not you.”

He stilled, glancing up at her curiously.

“That’s not who you are,” she continued. “None of that defines you. You’re still the same Keith you were yesterday.” She smiled at him. “You’re still you. I know that. You know that. The rest of the team knows that, too. You’re still the Red Paladin, and you’re still our friend. You’re still part of this team…part of this family. And that’s not gonna change—Galra or not.” She took his hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. “I trust you.”

Keith flushed, smiling wanly as his grip on her hand tightened. “I—Pidge….”

She rested her head on his shoulder, curling up on the sofa beside him. “Now I don’t know about you,” she began casually, “but I know I haven’t really gotten much sleep these past few days. Or weeks. And I am tired.”

He laughed, wrapping an arm around her. “Believe it or not, I think I can relate to that.”

Kolivan and Antok had returned to the Marmora base, to wait until preparations were complete and to keep in contact with their infiltrator.

Everyone else waited in the bridge, going over the details and specifics of their plan once again.

“For this to succeed, we’re gonna need to split up,” Coran intoned as they all stood in the bridge. “We all have a task to do. If any one of us fails, the entire plan fails.”

“Right,” Hunk mumbled. “No pressure or anything.”

Keith clapped him on the shoulder. “We’ll be fine.”

Shiro nodded towards them. “Keith, Hunk: you’ll be in charge of getting the scaultrite. Pidge and Lance and I will head to Beta Traz to free Slav. Coran will go to Olkarion to coordinate the construction of the teludav, and Allura will get a crystal from the Balmera. Once that’s done, we’ll pick up Kolivan and Antok and head for Zarkon’s base.”

“And then Zarkon’s going down,” Lance said with a grin.

“Alright, the faster we get this done, the better,” Shiro continued. “Is everyone ready?” Nodding from around the room. “Good. Let’s move ou—”

Then the display screen starting flashing red.

“Zarkon again?” Pidge asked, already heading towards her station. “I thought we’d finally gotten him off our tail.”

“It’s not an attack,” Coran told them, typing away at his control panel. “We’re picking up a distress beacon.”

That didn’t do much to lessen the tension in the room. Allura and Shiro exchanged worrisome glances. We’re stretched too thin.

It was Keith who spoke. “We don’t have time for that. Kolivan told us how to stop Zarkon; we need to focus on the issue at hand.”

Allura pursed her lips. “The Paladin Code states that we must help all those in need.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that before,” Lance said, rolling his eyes. “When was it?” he continued sarcastically. “Oh, right. We were on our way to the Balmera when we were hailed by Rolo and Nyma.” He crossed his arms. “Hey, does anyone else remember that? The last time we got sidetracked from an urgent mission by a distress beacon like this?” he asked pointedly. “It ended with me handcuffed to a tree while Rolo and Nyma stole my lion. Ringing a bell?”

“Not every distress beacon is gonna be a trap set by bounty hunters,” Hunk tried to reason.

“I’m just saying.” Lance held up his hands in surrender. “Maybe we should stick to the plan at hand. You know, stopping Zarkon?”

Pidge crossed her arms. “I’m not turning my back on anyone who needs help.”

Shiro turned to Coran. “Where is it coming from?”

Coran pressed a few more buttons, and the image of a planet appeared on the main display screen. “A planet called Vallen,” he told them. “Our records show it was taken over by the Galra hundreds of years ago. They’ve…well, it seems they’ve been using it as…as a prison.”

The tension in the air only tightened. No one said it, but it still hung unspoken in the air: like Serva.

Shiro didn’t react outwardly––only continued to watch Coran. “And the distress beacon?”

“It appears to be coming from the prison. The prisoners there are rebelling, and are requesting backup.”

Pidge ignored the looks the others sent her, keeping her eyes pinned to the display. “We have to help them.”

Allura sighed. “As much as I think we should stay on track with our preparations, Pidge is right. We cannot ignore their calls for help simply because we’ve set our sights on a bigger target.”

Lance sighed. “Alright. Guess Slav will have to wait.”

“Coran, send them a response,” Shiro commanded. “Let them know that Voltron is on it’s way. Allura, we’re gonna need a wormhole. The rest of you: suit up.”

They exited the wormhole and Vallen came into focus. The planet, a mass of grays and blues, hung before them, suspended in the stars.

Shiro took it in calmly, nodding. “Alright, bring us in.”

“Ah, slight issue with that.”

Allura frowned. “What is it, Coran?”

Coran was fiddling with the data readouts of the scanners. “There’s a Galra ship coming in ahead of us.”

Keith’s head snapped up in surprise. “What? That’s impossible!”

Shiro placed a hand on his shoulder, then turned to Coran. “Are you sure it’s Galra?”

Before Coran could answer, the ship appeared before them. And along with it, multiple smaller ships, pods, and fighters, all blasting into view one by one. An entire fleet, in all it’s imposing purple glory.

“Pretty sure,” Coran squeaked.

“This can’t be good,” Lance muttered.

“How did they find us?” Allura demanded. “They must have known we were coming.” Pidge didn’t miss the sidelong glance she cast towards Keith.

“I thought Zarkon couldn’t track us through the Black Lion anymore,” Hunk fretted.

Pidge frowned. “They must’ve intercepted the distress call.”

Shiro set his jaw. “It doesn’t matter how they found us right now. We should get to our lions.”

“Wait.”

They all paused at Coran’s outburst, turning towards him curiously.

“Coran?” Allura pressed.

He took a deep breath, looking up from the console. “Incoming transmission, Princess.”

She seemed dumbstruck. “From…the Galra command ship?”

Shiro shot her a concerned glance, then turned back to Coran. “Accept it,” he commanded warily. “Everyone, be ready. Whatever they have to say, it can’t be good.”

The display screen flickered, and the view of Vallen was replaced by a vidlink with the Galra ship. A single Galra officer took up most of the screen, his chin pointed up in disdain.

“Voltron,” the Galra sneered. “I am Commander Reggar.”

Allura pursed her lips, glaring at the screen. “To what do we owe this call?”

“I come offering a bargain,” he told them. “I believe you have something I want. Namely, the Voltron lions. In return, it seems that I have something you want. Or, rather, someone. Two someones, who I’m sure some of your Paladins would be very pleased to see.”

Before Pidge could say anything, the image on the display screen changed. The camera panned over to show two people. Their hands were cuffed behind them, and sentries held them by the arms.

Pidge froze.

Matt.

But no, it wasn’t only Matt.

“Dad?” she whispered.

Ahead of her, Shiro tensed.

“Surrender Voltron,” spoke Reggar’s voice from offscreen, “and guarantee their freedom.”

Matt jerked away from the sentry. “Katie, no, it’s a trap!”

One of the sentries beside him smacked him with the butt of its gun, and he grunted in pain.

Pidge let out a small squeak, her hands flying to cover her mouth.

Lance put a hand on her shoulder protectively, coming to stand a half-step in front of her.

“Let them go, Reggar,” Shiro ordered, his voice steely. “They’re not involved in this.”

“Not involved?” The camera turned to focus back on Reggar, this time with a wider angle so as to keep the prisoners in the background. “Then in that case, perhaps I should simply dispose of them now—”

“No!”

She didn’t realize she had been the one to scream until the words had already left her mouth.

Reggar was smirking in triumph. “As I thought,” he quipped. “You have one varga,” he added. “Don’t disappoint me.” The comm link switched off, and the bridge was filled with silence.

Pidge couldn’t breathe.

Within two ticks of the transmission ending, Lance’s hand had moved from her shoulder to pull her into a hug. “Oh, Pigeon.”

And the rest of the team was there too, circling her, reaching out, their voices swirling around her as everything faded and conflicted and bled together. “Pidge—” “Is she okay?” “We have to do something.” “Katie?” “I’ve got her.”

She gasped in between her sobs, trying to remind herself to breathe. “We—we have—”

“I know,” Lance murmured, rubbing her back. “I know. We will.”

She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak, couldn’t move, couldn’t focus, couldn’t do much of anything other than cry.

Come on, Katie, pull it together, you don’t have time for this, just breathe, Pidge, breathe.

Distantly, she was aware of Shiro saying the same thing: “Deep breaths, Katie. Come on. Breathe with me.”

Her grip on reality tightened, and the tension in her shoulders started to ease.

When her tears slowed and her breathing evened out, she pulled back from the hug, blinking as everything came back into focus.

She was sitting in a heap on the floor (when had that happened?) with Lance kneeling by her on one side and Hunk on the other (hadn’t they done this already?).

Shiro was watching her face intently. “You here?” She nodded, and he reached out to help her back to her feet. “Alright, we need a plan of attack. And fast.”

She felt like her head was spinning. “But—But Zarkon.”

“This takes first priority.”

Pidge wiped at her eyes. “But the Blade—”

“The Blade of Marmora can wait.” Shiro insisted. “This is your family on the line here.”

Keith nodded. “Kolivan will—no, scratch that, Kolivan won’t understand. But you know what? Fuck Kolivan. We’re Voltron. He can’t tell us what to do.”

She didn’t quite laugh, but she felt herself smile. “Thanks, guys.”

Hunk rubbed her back, smiling softly. “‘Course.”

“We’re always gonna stand by you, Pidge,” Lance agreed.

Pidge took another deep breath, still trying to put her nerves at rest. “So?” She looked to Shiro. “What’s the plan?”

#Voltron Legendary Defender #Voltron: Legendary Defender #Voltron #vld #Voltron fanfic #Voltron fanfiction #vld fanfiction #fanfiction #Pidge Gunderson #Katie Holt #Matt Holt #Hunk Garrett #Keith Kogane #Takashi Shirogane #Lance McClain #Singularity #mine #I'm a writer #my writing

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andyfrills · 7 years

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Andy’s Fanfic Log 21/02/2017

So how that I've got this blog up and running I thought it might be a fun idea to regularly share the fanfics that I've recently read/am currently reading (since I tend to go through a lot of fics). The inspiration to do this actually came from @victuurificrec who, as the name suggests, runs a fic recommendation blog for yuri on ice. She is honestly a Godsend, the blog is so helpful and she gives amazing recommendations! So go check her out! Fair warning, I've been reading a heap of her recs so a fair amount of the yoi stuff you'll be able find on her blog.

I'm planning to do this once or twice a week, give or take~ I think I'll be organising the fics via fandom, with crossovers going under the fandom it displays most (e.g. a yoi Hogwarts au would go under yoi for its large interaction with yoi characters). If you have any tips or ideas surrounding this, then please don't hesitate to tell me!

Other posts in this little series will be able to be found under the read fanfiction tag on my page~

Fic Count: 23 Fandoms in this Log: Yuri!!! on Ice, Voltron, Harry Potter, One Piece, NCIS

On a cautionary note, I end up reading a lot of random shit. Until I’m a bit more comfortable I might censor a few things out, but there will be explicit fics, darker themes, crazy plots, and insane ships amongst all the sugar and fluff I find around the place. So the really important thing is to carefully read the warnings that I occasionally give & that are on the fic itself, and back away if it’s not for you.

Now, without further ado, let's get into this loong first log!

Yuri!!! on Ice

Enchanted by FlishFlash121 Words: 5.8k, Rating: Teen, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Victuuri (Viktor Nikiforov/Yuuri Katsuki) Viktor Nikiforov is the eleven king of an enchanted forest. Mortal Katsuki Yuuri finds himself on a mission in said forest. - Cool concept for a fantasy au. Quite good so far and I'm looking forward to seeing more of it~!

of dusk and dawn and a love beyond by exile_wrath Words: 5.5k, Rating: G, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri The King of Day, Victor, drops flowers to the Ruler of Night, Yuuri, to express his love for him; yet, they are always returned, as Yuuri thinks that they’re dropped by mistake. Victor cries and plucks wishes off the petals every time, remembering the time when once, they had been together. - Rather sweet imho <3

Stamina by Watermelonsmellinfellon Words: 1.1k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri “Can’t you go another round with me, Victor?” Yuuri purred, voicing teasing and deepening erotically. Victor’s eyes dilated once more and his breath hitched again. - Innuendos but no doing the do~ <3 Beautiful fic, go read it if you're into this sort of stuff!

After Banquet Special by Watermelonsmellinfellon Words: 1.1k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri What would happen if Victor had escorted Yuuri back to his hotel room after the banquet? - ;)

we're like two halves of one heart by grandeur Words: 2.9k, Rating: G, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri The man smiles at this, looking both unfairly beautiful and amused. “Very cute.” “She is,” Yuuri agrees. “I wasn’t talking about the dog.” - Dogs and fluff. All things seem right in the world with this fic~~

shape of you by grandeur Words: 8.5k, Rating: Teen, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri From: Viktor [06:59:20 A.M.] I checked over my schedule and I’m free on Friday night if you’re still up for a date~ ))) Yuuri almost throws his phone across the room. - Sequel to the previous fic in this list <3 The perfect addition if you ask me!

in need of melted marshmallow cuddles by Hitsugi_Zirkus Words: 1.7k, Rating: G, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri “Viktor. You’re Russian.” “I’m so glad you noticed, lyubov moya,” Viktor said, overly sweet as he kissed into Yuuri’s hair. “You’re a figure skater who spends most of his life on the ice.” “I don’t understand what you’re getting at.” “I mean how is it that you’re always so easily cold and-- Wait,” Yuuri’s eyes fell onto Viktor’s bundled up form under the comforter, “are you wearing my jackets? How many layers have you got on?” - Fluff and cuddles galore!

Maelstrom by feelslikefire Words: 43k, Rating: Explicit, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri Victor Nikiforov is poised to win gold in his fifth consecutive Grand Prix Final. He has the world at his feet, is unparalleled in the sport--right up until a snowstorm blows into Sochi, and he finds himself repeating the same day over and over and over. He stumbles over Yuuri Katsuki, and everything changes. - This is a time loop au and I think it's amazing! I really enjoyed reading it~!

I Want to Skate like Him by IdunAurora Words: 27k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri At age 27, five time consecutive world figure skating champion Yuuri Katsuki decides to retire. He has barely made it home to Hasetsu before he finds an eager and all too enthusiastic silver-haired Russian on the doorstep of Yu-Topia Akatsuki, demanding Yuuri to coach him. Well, it's not as if the Japanese legend has been able to get 23-year-old Viktor Nikiforov out of his mind since the young man enchanted him at the GPF banquet in Sochi months earlier, anyway. Also, Yuuri's smirks should be illegal. Viktor is certain he has spent more time imitating a tomato than he has been skating. - A really good role swap au!

our doubts are traitors by astoryaboutwar Words: 11k, Rating: Explicit, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Victuuri “Back then,” Yuuri asks. “Did you love me?” The cigarette hangs low, tucked between Victor’s lips. The end glows steadily orange, devil eyes on a coal-black night. (Some ghosts of your past you leave well alone.) (Or: the powered assassins AU in which betrayal comes first, forgiveness second, and love was always somewhere in the equation.) - A really interesting au! Waiting eagerly for more~

That's the trouble with us by heygorgeous Words: 6.3k, Rating: G, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Victuuri [AU - Elemental Magic] Viktor Nikiforov is a legend. That, anyone within a five mile radius of the porcelain demigod can tell; the fact that there’s a statue of the man smack in the middle of the institution’s courtyard goes to show exactly how deeply regarded he is. It’s just a little awkward, seeing as Viktor’s still, well, alive; his many achievements and breakthroughs in ice dancing, secondary Elements, and magical therapy may seem superfluous to the common man, but it’s what’s inspired the fusion of scientific, practical magic with the traditional aesthetical appreciation of wizardry. The man is a living legend, an urban myth, a collector of headlines and trophies and tokens of appreciation. This statue is nothing less. Enter Katsuki Yuuri, back as straight as a broom, fingers tightly anchored to the strap of his messenger bag. He’s sure there’s been some sort of mistake that his application got through, but the paper of acceptance is strangely durable and far too ancient to be some sort of joke. - Arrrrgh, this fic is so good! I feel like I need to read more T^T

Re: Yuri Katsuki by Ishxallxgood Words: 33k, Rating: G, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Victuuri, ChulaCometti (Phichit/Christophe - is that what we're calling this ship? If so I’m jumping aboard! Just hints in recent chaps btw) Phichit Chulanont is fiercely loyal to his best friend Yuri Katsuki. So when he randomly gets a direct message on Instagram from one v_nikiforov, it's only natural for Phichit to assume it's a prank. That is until he comes to realize it's not a prank. A story about how Phichit and Viktor bonded over their most favorite topic; Yuri Katsuki. Phichit knows all the things. - Phichit is a devious gift to the fandom, just like this fic. <33 It's beautiful, I love it, go read it.

Amateur Night by Ishxallxgood Words: 3.3k, Rating: Not Rated (I’d say around Teen), Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri, ChulaCometti (Hints) It all started with a Groupon for a pole dancing class... Phichit convinces Yuuri to actually dance for Amateur night and is pleasantly surprised when he recognizes two faces in the crowd. - Fic about a night mentioned in chap 27 of the previous fic in this list. Phichit strikes again! <3

Warmth by SuggestiveScribe Words: 1.4k, Rating: G, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Victuuri "I love nights like tonight," Viktor commented as he allowed a momentary pause in his gait. He lifted his chin to the sky, gloved fingers still securely fastened over Yuuri's hand. "It feels dream-like, doesn't it? It's so..." He didn't pull his eyes away from the sky as he thought, and in the light his lashes were pale threads of golden silk. "Euphoric," he decided. - So cute~ So pure~ <3

Voltron

Marital Mayhem by genello Words: 21k, Rating: Teen, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Klance (Keith/Lance) Cornered by the Galra, Lance and Keith find shelter in a local temple. There's just one problem—the natives seem to think the two of them are engaged. - I live for this type of fluff <3 Can't wait for more!

Quiznak Actually by fairy_laughing Words: 10k (expected to be around 30k), Rating: Teen, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Klance, Shallura (Shiro/Allura) Hunk ships Klance so hard. Too bad those two idiots are blind as to how crazy in love they are with each other. Hunk decides he’s going to get them together by any means possible. There will be misunderstandings, awful dad-jokes, 60s cable, and space flu for all. This was written for the Primary Paladin Big Bang 2017 and there is artwork inside! - What it says on the box~ Very cute so far!

Harry Potter

Victory Day by WhiteWave14 Words: 301k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Harry Potter/Voldemort (I know, I was a bit surprised at first too) Harry grew up in a Rebel camp with Sirius after Voldemort's triumph over Wizarding Britain. Burdened by the Prophecy, he begins to doubt the Rebels' morals and slowly gets caught in his fascination for a certain Dark Lord. - I actually quite enjoyed this one. I found the plot interesting and well thought out, and the character development quite good. It has been a little while since I read this, and I don't remember if it gets explicit anywhere or not, so please tread carefully on this one.

Lonely Moon by eleventy7 Words: 65k, Rating: Teen, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Draco/Harry More than a decade after the Battle, Harry returns to Hogwarts as a professor and discovers a student with a familiar face and an unexpected past. - Sweet with a bit of angst ft. Papa Draco and his Cutie Son

Between Ruin and Salvation by ms. commas and ampersands Words: 44k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Draco/Luna - Actually a hetro pairing for once ww It was only one second. One second when Remus stared at the rigid body of his last best friend falling through the veil. One second when he heard James's son too late, when he wasn't fast enough to catch him. Then Harry ran through the veil. - I somehow found this old fic a while ago, it's an interesting read. The pairings listed on the summary aren't right btw.

Full Circle by tetsurashian Words: 14k, Rating: Mature, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Harry P./Tom R. Jr. Harry and Tom's souls are tied together. Which is why they're in this endless loop of rebirth. At some point, they stopped caring and just started f**king with people. - The humor is on point in this fic. Needless to say, I really enjoyed it.

Recreated Fire A Harry Potter/One Piece X-over by Mai Kusakabe Words: 117k, Rating: Mature, Status: Wip Relationship(s): Ace!Harry/Marco Harry Potter has always dreamed about a dark haired boy, his thrilling life and adventures. When his Hogwarts letter arrives, he discovers a new, magical world, and that not everything is what it seems to be, all in the form of a mythical bird that insists on befriending him. - This is seriously one of my favourite fics around, I absolutely love it. I'm constantly rereading it, I've lost count of the number of times, and I still enjoy it just as much the tenth time round as I did the first. I'd say that this is one of the best reincarnation fics in the HP/OP x-over verse.

One Piece

Azure and Ash by Mithril Lace Words: 86k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): Marco/Ace For years Ace has dedicated himself to supporting his brothers. When the kingdom falls on hard times, Ace is forced to take drastic measures to care for his ailing little brother. Against Sabo and Luffy's wishes, he volunteers for a dangerous mission from the king: to kill the creature responsible for the kingdom's distress and bring back proof - a single feather from the phoenix. - I love this fic~ I've re-read it a number of times now and it's one of my favourite Marco/Ace fics <33

NCIS

Burning Rubber an NCIS/One Piece X-over by Kitsune Foxfire Words: 217k, Rating: Mature, Status: Complete Relationship(s): None - That I can remember... It's never just another case, particularly not when conspiracies are involved. The corpse of a modern pirate shows up on a naval base, a continent away from where he was last seen. Signs show he had unusual abilities; so did the UNSUB. What role do two black haired brothers play in all this? Can the team figure out just what is going on here before it's too late? - A brilliant, brilliant fic. Well thought out and executed. I've only read it twice since finding it, but it's definitely a fic I'd be more than happy to read over and over.

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empathique · 7 years

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Tehg

Tagged by @pengwenno <3 *tosses you your daily quota of plushies*

1. Are you named after someone?

Nope. Apparently my father, who is very knowledgeable about Mandarin and Chinese Culture, gave me named me after some sort of jade. So although my name isn’t exactly uncommon, the characters used aren’t very common.

(Still, better than the time my mother told me that I was named to match my brother and thus my name had no meaning)

((Evidently, my mother didn’t name us.))

2. When’s the last time you cried?

Er-- *checks the time*

......half an hour ago?

3. Do you like your handwriting?

U g h not at all. It’s right in the middle of cursive and neat so it’s really just a mess.

4. What’s your favorite lunch meat?

I’m not picky, but duck meat is pretty good.

5. Do you have kids?

Nope. I’m actually quite scared of them.

6. If you were another person, would you be friends with yourself?

I... might? I’m horrible at staying in contact with people even though I like them, and I’m Awkward Turtle 2.0, so I might just be... a friend that I’m comfortable with hanging out with but not usually talking to/messaging with.

7. Do you use sarcasm?

I used to be known for my sarcastic humor back in secondary school and junior college, but I think I’ve just been trying to be more positive in general so I’ve lost my flair for it.

8. Do you still have your tonsils?

Yep (what are tonsils--)

9. Would you bungee jump?

I wouldn’t want to, but if my friends wanted to and I was already right there at the top of the... thing, I probably would.

I draw the line at sky-diving though.

10. What’s your favorite kind of cereal?

Don’t really eat cereal, and I’m not picky~

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

If I can toe them off, no. But I am that loser that has to retie my shoelaces when I put them on again, so I honestly just hold everyone back while I bend over unattractively and balance on one foot.

12. Do you think you’re a strong person?

Ah this question is always a conundrum for me. On one hand I think that I’m just good at keeping up appearances and in truth I Cannot (TM), but on another hand, well, technically I’m pretty strong for being able to keep up those appearances. Hm.

13. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?

Mint chocolate.

14. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their - how do I put this without sounding weird - vibes? Just the entire feeling they exude, and it might not have any relation to their looks or personality or what I’ve heard about them. I can usually tell off the bat when that person will become a very close friend, or when I will dislike them (and I’m usually right). People that I come to dislike (I’ve only ever met four in my life) tend to have this... slimy kind of vibe. I try not to let it interfere with how I interact with them but it usually ends up going the way I expect it to. And they usually end up quite unpopular among everyone else, honestly.

15: Red or pink?

Red. My room was an obnoxious shade of pink for the past... 10 years, and I’ve just been scarred. Thankfully I replaced that horrible color with grey recently.

16. What’s the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself?

My cheeks. It’s true that I first lost weight in my face (as most people do) but then it just. Stopped. And now I’m left with this annoying baby fat that refuses to leave. The only redeeming quality about it is that I look younger and that will probably be advantageous when I get older lmao.

17. What color pants and shoes are you wearing now?

Black and black. If you must know my top is black as well. I clearly have a very friendly and bright atmosphere about me I don’t know what all these stares are about--

(ah, there’s the sarcasm I thought I lost)

18. What’s the last thing you ate?

A slice of banana cake for breakfast. I’m hungry.

19. What are you listening to right now?

The mournful cries of stressed college students.

20. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?

The beige crayon because everyone just uses it until it’s a teeny stub that cannot handle life. But people still try to lose it please stop--

21. Favorite smell?

Books. Books. And fresh laundry. And I have a friend whose fabric softener smells really good and I was nearly falling asleep next to her during lecture.

22. Who’s the last person you spoke to on the phone?

My mom.

23. Favorite game?

Ib. Left 4 Dead also has a special place in my heart.

24. Hair color?

Brown with my black roots growing down half of my head. Hair dying is just such a long and tedious process and I don’t have time for that.

25. Eye color?

Boring ol’ black. I’m Asian.

26. Do you wear contacts?

Nope. My mom is quite adamant against my wearing contacts, and I can still see without my glasses on, anyway.

27. Favorite food to eat?

Sweets. Desserts. Anything sweet. Except maybe pudding because I don’t like the texture. Ooh, and anything that has cheese as well.

28. Scary movies or comedy?

Comedy. I can’t handle horror movies...even though I enjoy horror games. I haven’t quite figured that out.

29: Last movie you watched?

.....*squints* Hero (the chinese movie! I watched it for Literature class)

30. What color shirt are you wearing?

Black

31. Summer or winter?

Winter

32. Hugs or kisses?

HUGSSSS. I love snuggles please give me snuggles

33. What book are you currently reading?

I Am A Cat by Natsume Soseki. I’m terrible I haven’t read much of it and I feel so guilty hngah ;A;. That, and I’m studying the Great Gatsby for my Literature module

34. Who do you miss right now?

Not a person, but I can’t help but mourn the passing of the time where the people around me were happy, when our biggest problems were arguments over trivial things, and when we never had to worry about mortality. Especially so now, because many things have been happening and sigh. Feelsbad, even though I’m very aware that this is a growing pain and an inevitable part of life.

35. What’s on your mouse pad?

A picture of Sebastian and Ciel from Kuroshitsuji. I’m waiting for a BSD mousepad for me to throw my wallet at, though.

36. What’s the last TV show you watched?

*whispers* I really don’t watch TV

37. What’s the best sound?

Keyboard typing, flipping of the pages of a book, a crackling fire (can you tell I like ASMR)

38. YouTube mashups or ambient noise?

Mashups. Ambient noise was what I listened to when I was studying for my O levels, and I think I’ve been traumatised.

39. What’s the farthest you have ever traveled?

England, for a Literature school trip! I went with two of my best friends and a bunch of people I got along with, so I have very fond memories of it.

40. Do you have a special talent?

U h, being able to accurately guess the topics that are tested on exams? I’m really good at predicting stuff.

41. Where were you born?

Singapore, and I’m still here.

42. People you’d like to participate in this survey?

www why does this sound so formal.

@looking-for-stray-dogs, @hanahikari, @magicalgirlmafu, @nekojimaxosamew, @moneera-87, @truedespair

(please don’t feel obligated to do it if you don’t want to!)

#em speaks #about em #thank you for the taaag #i'm sorry if i sound a little moody #sensitive content #tagging juuust in case #i'm always afraid that my moodiness will affect others when they read things ahhh

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hitachihanoi · 5 years

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5 Tricks for Writing any Self-Help Reserve Backed by Robust Research

Now i’m not exactly a fresh England Patriot’s fan. Not necessarily that I really have anything up against the Patriots, other than my vague annoyance the past 10 years of Very Bowl video game titles has started to take a look a bit repetitive thanks to Ben Brady in addition to Bill Belichick. In fact Now i’m only the NFL supporter in the most generous application of the term-that is, Therefore i’m usually within the room during maximum football year when my husband has commandeered most of our own illuminated window screens in order to show as many contingency games as is possible.

But I actually do tend to keep on reading than the person with average skills, and Now i am also the sort of one that has this peculiar weakness for the lose of marathons and other energy sports. And once I check out The TB12 Method , a diet in addition to fitness publication released recently by a male who handles to on a regular basis eviscerate his or her more-than-worthy enemy even at the relatively early (in footballing player years) age of 45, I thought it may teach us something applicable to my own, personal health and fitness targets.

As far as gross sales go, typically the phrase “roaring success” basically inaccurate. It has become a New york city Times bestseller and still holds the #1 bestselling i’m all over this Amazon intended for Sports & Outdoors. That received very good reader evaluations too, and-perhaps most importantly-Brady’s strict weight loss and extending regimen can appear to give loan to his mind-blowing longevity, agility and strength.

So I surely can’t problem him for sharing (albeit with the help of ghostwriter Peter Smith) his achievement with the most us which will never become five-time Very Bowl champs. Plus, lots of what the reserve says jibes with other health and fitness advice a person run into: Cut down on caffeine, booze, processed foods along with other delicious habits; stretch like it’s your career; drink much more water; eat more whole foods as well as fresh make.

But many of the reviews-from typically the New York Occasions inches characteristically dry overview to help SB Place’s biting smirk-pointed out the fact that science driving the book wasn’t completely, well, methodical, especially for any book rich in claims you would assume needs to really rely fairly seriously on biochemistry and chemistry and biology. It wasn’t all completely wrong , impressive advice will make you better (except possibly for the hyponatremia-inducing total reduction of sodium), but as solutions including Vox noticed, “There’s no good technological evidence the diet does the specific points Brady claims-neutralize the body’s pH level as well as improve muscle recovery. ”

Does which make it an unhelpful self-help publication? Not at all. A lot of people might find health benefits throughout Brady’s tips, and it has undoubtedly been successful. Objective accomplished.

But , if you’re the writer thinking about composing your personal self-help, fitness, motivation, or not satisfying you advice-based book-and particularly if you aren’t a globally-recognized pro footballing player whose face in addition to name solely can sell 1000s of copies-I’d notify that you make sure your claims are usually fact-based along with appropriately supported by reliable options and study.

Here are a few research tips to keep your work is the best better next to a critical eye than this method did:

your five Tips for Creating a Self-Help Book Backed by Strong Research

Don’t Low fat Too Intensely on Testimonies

If you’re writing a self-help book, anyone surely include knowledge to talk about on the topic of your choice. Yet there’s a distinct difference concerning backing up your own personal claims with fact-based information and counting upon individual anecdotes in order to your history. Anecdotal facts is accumulated informally-from your current limited activities, stories might heard, and so on -while fact-based evidence depends upon small sample data and thorough research.

Much of the proof that Brady cites within the self-help guide, for example , will be based upon his own success with his exercise and dieting plan. It doesn’t make the information untrue, or perhaps unhelpful, but it isn’t backed by statistics as well as scientific studies, and as a consequence there is no guarantee-and, indeed, absolutely no data sample to support-that the results described in the guide will be people who every human being experiences.

Profiting well-researched data and files instead of anecdotes will loan your reserve more believability, improve the reliability of outcomes for your readers, and ensure that it holds up under scrutiny.

Degrees of anecdotes versus empirical (fact-based) evidence:

Anecdote: “The individuals in my meditation class located that the regimen improved their own balance, posture and peace of mind. ” Empirical statement: “According with a study from the National Middle for Complementary and Integrative Health, those with chronic lower back pain had even less disability, discomfort and major depression after training yoga regarding six months. micron

Anecdote: “Author Samuel Smiles types said, “he who by no means made a mistake, never created a discovery. ‘” Empirical affirmation: “Research by Stanford University professor Hazel Dweck seems to indicate that helping kids acknowledge all their mistakes while praising these individuals for their efforts results in superior test lots. ”

Research Tips for Creating Nonfiction

Carefully Vet Your own Experts

Alex Guerrero, Brady’s “body coach” whose methods provided the foundation for The TB12 Method , has been investigated by the National Trade Commission rate twice for creating claims regarding his wellness products which turned out to be unsubstantiated.

If you plan to utilize one or more experts’ advice as being the core within your book, which advice has to hold up to rigorous analysis. You could carefully look at their qualifications, history, kind of work and the own methods that triggered their data. Ideally you will want to include things like information coming from more than one skilled. If you’re meeting with ann specialist, make sure to require the research or maybe evidence guiding her says.

If you are your expert-e. gary the gadget guy., you have a complicated degree with your field regarding study and possess conducted intensive research into your topic-call upon peers whoever work possesses preceded or maybe complemented your own for aiding opinions.

Qualities to watch out for in experts:

Doctorates as well as advanced levels in a relevant field connected with study through accredited universities.

Credibly printed papers, books and study, preferably from past several years.

Extensive skilled experience using the topic open to them.

Appropriate qualifications, where pertinent. For instance, anyone making claims regarding accounting is definitely a CPA.

Infractions in other studies. That is certainly, has this particular expert recently been cited frequently by your girlfriend peers who may have researched related topics?

Writer’s Market 2018

Mix up Your Sources

Using the insights of your person do you know questionable products have got him inside hot water with all the federal government is certainly one thing, but leaning consequently heavily on that one individual’s expertise is compared to building a house supported by just one (precarious) expoliar.

If you want your thesis to hold up against crucial assaults, start make their supports as stable as it can be, and that implies using a variety of sources that point to a similar conclusion. Mixture a robust number of primary and secondary solutions for the best outcomes. This approach could also add fascination to your overarching narrative.

Here are a few different varieties of primary methods:

Scientific studies, essentially from respected universities, businesses and companies (preferably definitely not associated with for-profit businesses or even activist groups).

Statistical information. (Keep reading through for a number of helpful solutions for studies. )

Historic accounts and archival content such as manuscripts and journals.

Legal and also financial papers.

Interviews together with experts and/or people who have experienced relevant activities.

And a few types of secondary options:

Newspaper and magazine articles or blog posts.

Scholarly articles that street address someone else’s first research.

Nearly all books for a given nonfiction topic.

Use Verifiable Data

When coming up with empirical promises, make sure that somebody else researching exactly the same topic would certainly find the similar information by employing reliable, 3rd party data resources. Government agencies, educational institutions, hospitals as well as global study organizations fantastic places to start out for specifics, statistics along with data.

Observe that many studies by for-profit organizations, think fish tanks and activist organizations cherry-pick data, which will result in deceit of data and unsupported results, so make sure to take a look at who funded the research as well.

Recommended info sources to apply when producing a self-help book:

Business & Finance:

World Bank Data

Section Study of Income Mechanics

Consumer Behaviour Data

EconData. net

Motivation & Psychology:

The American Psychological Association

The General Public Survey

The Institute intended for Quantitative Social Science

Health & Fitness:

The World Wellbeing Organization

Often the Centers to get Disease Command & Elimination

Statistics with Sports

Man Mortality Data bank

Nurturing:

Baby Language Records Exchange Technique (CHILDES)

Typical Core of information

National Company of Child Health and Human Development

National Info Archive about Child Maltreatment and Ignore (NDACAN)

Faith:

The Association of Religion Files Archives

Hartford Institute intended for Religion Investigation

Association associated with Statisticians of yankee Religious Systems (ASARB)

All-Purpose:

The US Census Bureau

Integrated Public Utilize Microdata Collection

Pew Study Center

Nationwide Center for Statistics and also Analysis (NCSA) | NHTSA

Look at your Facts

Upon having the research, interview and bottom information on your book jointly (or because you’re assmbling it), make sure you fact-check. Below are a few fact-checking strategies that I have used in inspective journalism perform in the past.

Fact-checking guidelines:

Make sure your hard facts are covered by at least 2 credible resources.

Collect origin materials from any specialists you employment interview.

Independently validate names, date ranges and amounts.

If you find details online, comply with links along with citations on the raw reference. (This pays to when fact-checking news articles or blog posts you’re examining as well. )

Evaluate the effect of your own bias. If you domyhomework pro feel clearly about the subject you’re creating on, be sure to haven’t cherry-picked information that will supports your personal conclusions, nevertheless that another person could draw the same summary based on your.

Work with a actuality checker. There are freelance fact-checking experts on the market (and your potential manager may have many as well) who can be certain that your information will be strong, thorough and accurate.

The post 5 Tricks for Writing any Self-Help Reserve Backed by Robust Research appeared first on Hitachi Hà Nội.

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type2diabetestreatments-blog · 7 years

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What's Hot from ADA 2012 - t:slim Pump, T1D Exchange, Youth Transitions and More

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What's Hot from ADA 2012 - t:slim Pump, T1D Exchange, Youth Transitions and More

Sixteen-thousand doctors, scientists, and other healthcare providers. Hundreds of Pharma industry folks and food and diabetes supply vendors manning 171 booths in a cavernous exhibit hall. Over 2,500 research reports, plus over 2,000 more studies presented on mini-billboards known as research posters. More than 150 live sessions where experts present nearly 378 reports on every imaginable aspect of diabetes in the human body.

This is the American Diabetes Association annual Scientific Sessions conference, taking place this year from June 8-12 in Philadelphia. Once again, we are there.

First impressions?

Amy: "I love the focus on behavioral issues and on youths transitioning into adulthood with diabetes this year. Those are two areas that are traditionally so underserved! So it's great to see a lot of new research in that area. Also, no one's saying 'pipe dream' about Artificial Pancreas technology anymore, are they?!"

Mike: "Being my first-ever time attending, let me just say... WOW! I'm amazed at the scope of everything going on. It's an incredible experience with a lot to absorb. But at the same time it's a little disappointing to feel like a lot of these experts are missing the point; it's not about stats, graphs, and scientific concepts. It's about us as people and patients."

Allison: "It's always remarkable to see so many people focusing in the intricacies of diabetes. Each time I attend conferences, I gain even more appreciation for how complicated this disease is! But I also bemoan the fact diabetes is so complicated... Advancements just never seem to come fast enough, do they?!"

Device Updates

On the technology side, the big buzz was of course the official launch of Tandem's t:slim insulin pump, a sleek little model with color touch screen reminiscent of Apple products. We wrote about the t:slim in some detail last fall. The company is taking orders as of today, and the product will ship to customers starting in August. Insurance coverage is still TBD, and the out-of-pocket price tag is about $5,000.

At a "Product Theater" presentation Saturday, conference-goers got to see a full live demo of the t:slim's features and functionality. It sure as heck looks easy and intuitive to use! One function that I thought was awesome is a little "IOB clock" that appears on the home screen, showing how much "insulin on board" is still active in your system, complete with a time count-down to let you know when it's wearing off. Useful! Look for more details on the t:slim launch from us soon.

On the topic of next-generation pumps: conspicuously absent from ADA this year were the Debiotech folks with their wireless, smartphone-connected Jewel Pump, which made such an impression a few years ago.

But looking at their site, it seems they're in the midst of a multi-center user study in Europe on an algorithm for a closed-loop system including the Dexcom sensor, as part of the European Artificial Pancreas consortium. So maybe they're holding back on a pump introduction until they can offer a more integrated system. We'll keep you posted.

Another pre-FDA-approval wireless pump from CellNovo that includes integrated glucose testing and can actually be controlled via cell phone was getting a lot of attention in its expo booth, despite the fact that nothing much seems to have changed since the system was demo'ed last summer. Company reps tell us the product's doing well in Europe, but U.S. FDA approval is being held back by two things: an upgrade from 3G to 4G wireless technology. and a necessary changeover to the OneTouch Verio test strip (in Europe the system currently uses another, which is not sold in the U.S.). They're also in the midst of a UK-based usability trial.

The new iBGStar meter was of course on display, and Sanofi had an eye-popping 3D movie showcasing this device that passed FDA approval in December. We were already impressed, as it's the first and only cable-free meter that connects directly to an iPhone and iPod touch, but there's nothing like a bunch of doctors wearing red 3D glasses oohing and aahhing through a film about a BG meter taking them on a journey through time! (Actually, the film almost made it look like iBGStar is continuous glucose monitor, if you just watched it without knowing any better.)

Remember the all-in-one Pogo ("Press & Go") blood meter by Intuity Medical? Well, it was on display again (five years running) but it's still not available to buy. The company says they filed for FDA approval last summer. The most noticeable change is that the motor's even quieter now (as in, you can barely hear it lance). No blood or needle seen, thanks to the 10-strip drum inside. They've also got a separate FDA submission filed for a web-based data software called Patterns that would be downloadable for free. The Pogo looks cool, but we've seen this for so many years, the story is the same: let us know when it hits the market!

T1D Exchange National Type 1 Registry!

One of the most exciting things announced here, hands-down, was the Helmsley Charitable Trust official launch of its T1D Exchange Registry, "the most comprehensive analysis of people with type 1 diabetes ever undertaken in the United States." This new national registry has collected data from 25,000 participants to date from 67 clinics across the country, and the analysis of that data has yielded some very surprising things — mainly that A1Cs on the whole are too high for comfort, especially in the over-50 T1 crowd, which also had the highest rates of severe hypoglycemia and ER visits. I would've pegged adolescents, for sure!

What's particularly exciting with T1D Exchange is that this group is on a holy mission to help accelerate progress in research and development of new treatments. At a Saturday evening reception, the room was humming with anticipation as David Panzirer, Dana Ball and other project leaders outlined how T1D Exchange plans to act as a liaison between industry, regulatory, academic and patient groups to get things moving better, faster, and more productively. Patient-reported data is key to this, they say: "We'd love to transform the way clinical trials are done in America." Wow! Considering how much they've accomplished in just a year and a half — creating and launching the registry + fantastic online community called MyGlu.org (do check it out!) — I for one cannot wait to see where this group is going! (Disclosure: myself and a few other well-known DOCers are part of an outreach advisory board for this project.)

Insulin News

Novo's new degludec beat Lantus in lowering glucose in Type 2's in a recent study, but we heard word at the conference that FDA approval of degludec has been delayed until at least October.

Meanwhile, cancer risk from insulin was a key topic this year. A huge Sanofi-sponsored study showed that there was no increase in cancer risk from using Lantus, as had previously been reported. This will come as a relief to many, not least the company!

Another study, sponsored by the NIDDK (acronym ORIGIN), shows the first-ever clinical evidence that long-term use of any kind of insulin is safe! In more than 12,500 patients over a median of 6.2 years, researchers found that daily injections "neither increased or reduced the risk of heart attacks, strokes, cancer or cardiovascular-related mortality."

SGLT2 Inhibitors

This is a new class of drugs under development that works primarily by helping the body slough off excess glucose in urine — in a healthy way. Beohringer, Lilly and J&J are all working on a daily pill for type 2s that could hit market as early as 2013. J&J's canagliflozin is the most advanced to date and is already under evaluation by the FDA. These drugs also have promise for treating type 1s, I am told.

Further on the research side, here are some of the ADA updates we found most noteworthy:

Source: references to all research abstracts can be found on the ADA website here

* Transition of Youth to Adult PWDs

We love that this topic was finally in the spotlight! Remember just a few short years ago, when the diabetes establishment seemed to be oblivious to the fact that all puppies grow up to be dogs (err, all "juvenile diabetics" have to keep on truckin' after age 18)?

New research "sheds light on the health status and psychosocial challenges faced by this population." Unfortunately, the facts are grim. One study showed that non-diabetic college coeds scored higher than PWD youths on "purpose and life satisfaction," BUT the two groups scored the same on depressive symptoms, disordered eating, alcohol use, smoking and sleep quality. (So everyone has an equal opportunity to crash and burn in college years?)

Another study showed that type 1 adolescents were at 20% higher risk for suicidal tendencies than their non-D counterparts. Another showed that as young PWDs transition from pediatric care to adult doctors, they "experience sadness and loss over leaving the doctors with whom they had grown up, felt like their new doctors were more like partners in care but didn't know then as well and felt as if they needed to be matched with their new new doctors by personality style." Amen to that!

One more study in this area found that those who transition out of pediatric care too early face higher risks to their health, i.e. their A1Cs tend to shoot up once dropped into the free-falling world of "adult care." Maybe the next round of research here ought to be on how we can make adult diabetes care more like the nurturing world of pediatric care?

* Islet Cell Transplantation Update

The results are much more encouraging here. One study showed that a new method of transplanting islet cells into the liver, called the Clinical Islet Transplantation 07 (CIT07) protocol, actually helped transplanted cells survive better than the current gold standard "Edmonton Protocol." Both protocols use the same immuno-suppressing drugs, but with CIT07, the islet cells are "cultured" prior to transplantation. Results suggest that the immuno-suppressing drugs may not be toxic to islets, as previously suspected. Which is good news!

Two other studies looked into use of the drugs sitagliptin and pantoprazole with transplantation. Results showed that these meds can "augment beta cell function," but fall short of actually regenerating beta cells (i.e. no new cells are created).

Another study found that transplanted cells function better and may survive longer when the patient takes a long-acting GLP-1 analog. So after transplant surgery, you may be off insulin but have to use another injectable drug?

One more study looked at patients who've had their pancreas removed. Does tight BG control in the hospital immediately following islet cell transplantation help the cells survive better? It does appear that way.

A few other studies looked at patients with pancreatic tumors and pancreatitis. The upshot is that the more islet cells transplanted, the better for long-term outcomes. And in the case of the tumor patients, "isolating" the islet cells during transplant procedures is also beneficial.

The more they learn about successful transplantation techniques the better, I always say!

* LADA is Not Different (?)

Really?! In contrast to a session we reported on from the recent AACE conference (American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists), a study presented here at ADA testified that LADA (latent autoimmune diabetes in adults) is NOT a distinct form of auto-immune diabetes.

This multi-country European study did find a few differences by age of onset: those diagnosed younger tended to have lower BMI and earlier need for insulin therapy.

But they found "insufficient differences in auto-antibodies to characterize LADA" as anything other than plain old type 1 in grown-ups. And the debate marches on...

* "Sleep Yourself Healthy"

There's actually an expression in German: Schlaf Dich Gesund, which literally means you can "sleep yourself healthy." And now it's a proven scientific fact! At least according to two studies presented here at ADA.

The first showed that not getting enough sleep, and poor sleep quality, significantly raises risk of developing diabetes in those who are at-risk. Folks in the study who got a full night's rest were 60% less likely to be diagnosed.

A second study showed that folks with sleep apnea had significantly higher post-meal BG levels "associated with greater risk for cardiovascular events." Conclusion? "Sleep apnea may have a substantial impact upon glucose regulation" and it's bad for your heart too. Bah! If you've got sleep disorders, get 'em treated, please!

* "An Apple a Day..."

It's no wives' tale. Research now shows that eating more fruit per day ("equivalent to about one apple or two bananas") is associated with lower incidence of diabetic retinopathy. In this 8-year study, those who ate the most fruit had the lowest incidence of retinopathy. But wait: TWO BANANAS a day with diabetes?! My, that sounds like a BG control disaster to me. Makes me wonder: don't these researchers cross-reference their work? Surely the two-banana group suffered in terms of rising A1C results...?

* Do Pollution and Cow's Milk Trigger Type 1?

Who read Dan Hurley's book Diabetes Rising, outlining all the prominent theories on what may trigger type 1 diabetes? Yup, environmental pollution and early consumption of cow's milk are right up there on the top of the list. Two new studies that looked at pollutants (pesticides and heavy metal concentrations) found that "only lead seems to be associated with an increased risk for this condition." Heck, lead in your bloodstream is surely not good for any aspect of your health, IMHO.

So what about giving your baby cow's milk too early in life? Continued analysis from an ongoing study called DAISY (Diabetes Autoimmunity Study In the Young) showed that this does NOT contribute to risk of type 1 diabetes. However, infants who get fruit too early and rice and barley too late appeared to be at greater risk. Researchers conclude: "There is a complex relationship between the timing and type of food an infant is exposed to and his or her risk of developing type 1." (No pressure, new moms! Geez!!)

* Ancient Drug Could Help Type 2s

I'm quoting the press release on this one:

"In the first modern-day clinical trial of one of the world oldest drugs, researchers have found that salicylate, first used by the ancient Egyptians and Greeks to ease pain caused by inflammation, also has glucose-lowering properties and may be a potential treatment for people with type 2 diabetes."

The drug is derived from the bark of the willow tree, is relatively inexpensive, and is still used commonly for treating joint pain. "Nobody has ever looked before to see what other properties it might have," says principal investigator Dr. Steven Shoelson of Joslin Diabetes Center. In his study, it reduced A1C and fasting glucose levels in 286 T2 patients.

Wow. Back to basics, ay? Just like I recently discovered that good 'ol fashioned white vinegar cleans your house better than most of those fancy, expensive spray products. (Housewife tip!) Keep your eye out for more news on salicylate.

* Artificial Pancreas Update

So much work is being done in this area! Very exciting!

Some of you may have caught the JDRF/Helmsley AP webinar last week, so you heard that Medtronic is developing dual-sensor technology to increase the accuracy (i.e. safety) of a potential closed-loop system. Obviously, sensor reliability is key!

Disclaimer: Content created by the Diabetes Mine team. For more details click here.

Disclaimer

This content is created for Diabetes Mine, a consumer health blog focused on the diabetes community. The content is not medically reviewed and doesn't adhere to Healthline's editorial guidelines. For more information about Healthline's partnership with Diabetes Mine, please click here.

Type 2 Diabetes Treatment Type 2 Diabetes Diet Diabetes Destroyer Reviews Original Article

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