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xpeachesncream · 3 years

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it takes two | one shot (myg)

summary: min yoongi was the one who came to understand you and took you for you. but, when boundaries start getting crossed and priorities begin to change, you start to question if your relationship with your bestfriend is strong enough to make it through.

pairing: athlete!reader x athlete!myg

genre: bestfriends to lovers au, basketball au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 12.3k

warnings: cussing, mature language/implied sexual content, protected AND unprotected sex (later on), slight breast play, oral (f. receiving), fingering, multiple orgasms, missionary, riding/straddling, mentions of alcohol consumption, dancing, mention of marijuana, sex on the beach kinda?, some heavy angst, insecurities, crying, injuries (like a cut/ankle sprain), yoongi is just kind of an idiot at one point

note: heavily inspired by the movie love and basketball. unedited for the most part, pls excuse any spelling/grammar errors.

tags: @ggukkieland @miinoongi @bluesharksandfish @unicornbabylover

⏏︎ now playing: triggered - jhené aiko ; sorry enough - chris brown

First Quarter: 6th Grade

You didn't really have a lot of friends in elementary school. Any, actually. Hell, the girls in your class purposely ignored you because you acted different. Dressed different. Enjoyed the shit boys liked, like playing ball and video games. You couldn't relate to their gel pens, Lisa Frank folders, cute binder stickers and bracelet charms. None of that shit was you. But you didn't care, you were fine by yourself. Nobody to please, nobody to care for.

The only person that came to understand you was Min Yoongi and that's because you played basketball with him and his friends during daycare. At first, it came as a surprise because truthfully, you felt like Yoongi only let you play because he felt bad for you. Which, okay, whatever— so be it. But, after the last round during a game of two versus two, you found yourself on the ground, huge gash on the knee from chasing after the ball before it could go out of bounds.

"Ouch! Crap!" You groaned as you sat up and checked out your knee. Yoongi walks towards you and crouches down, examining the bloody gash.

"Come on." He says, holding out a hand to help lift you up. He swings your arm over his shoulder, already knowing that any sudden movements to your knee can make the wound sting. He takes his time and walks with you as you hop on one leg towards the office, not really saying much. Yoongi wasn't the most talkative in class. He hung out with two or three other boys in your class on the daily, but they were quiet. Weren't much troublemakers, didn't cause ruckus like the other boys did. But, he was still popular among the girls because he was a little cutiepie. You remember walking into the bathroom, hearing Angie and her friends tease her about her crush on Yoongi. Then, the following week, one of her friends also ended up crushing on Yoongi and they bickered [weirdly] in the bathroom about it.

Getting to the office, he sits you down on the bench before approaching the office admin to grab some bandaids and ice for you.

"What can I do for you, Mr. Min?" Mrs. Yao comes over to greet him.

"Y/N's hurt. Can I get a bag of ice and a bandaid for her, please?" Mrs. Yao looks over her shoulder and does a head tilt before sighing. She knew you weren't like the girls in your class, always getting hurt one way or another, being more hardheaded and stubborn than the usual. She grabs a bag of ice and hands the supplies over to Yoongi before placing her hands on her hips.

"You think you can take care of Miss Y/N, or do you need me to help?" He shakes his head.

"I got it, thank you Mrs. Yao." He politely says, giving her a small toothless smile. You silently watch as he walks over, crouching down once again to tend to your wounds. "I don't think this will hurt, but stay still so I can put this bandaid on." He says softly as he spreads the small Neosporin packet across your wound. He wipes his finger down on his pants before removing the back of the bandaid and pressing it against your knee. "There. You should keep the ice on it so it doesn't bruise and stuff." He stands.

"Thank you." He nods as he watches you stand and slightly limp before you adjust your steps to the right pressure. He follows you out, coming back to your side with his hands in his pockets.

"Why don't you act like the other girls?" He asks, cocking an eyebrow at you.

"What? Not liking all the girly stuff that they like?"

"Sure, or you playing basketball. You know girls are usually like cheerleaders and cheer the guys on instead."

"Well, I don't wanna be a cheerleader. I just would rather play. What's wrong with it?"

"Nothing, it's just weird to see."

"You're weird." You snapped back.

"How am I weird?"

"You shoot weird."

"And you don't? I shoot better than you." He furrows his brows.

"No you don't."

"Fine, wanna play one more time? Unless you're a wuss and can't play cause of your knee." You rolled your eyes at the sudden change of events.

"I'll play you, I'm not a wuss. Unless you're afraid to lose to a girl." You taunt him as you both walk back to the court.

"Whatever, I'm not afraid cause I won't lose." He grabs the ball and checks it in. "My ball first."

"Sure, if you think that'll help."

And that's how Yoongi lost to you, busted knee and everything. From there, it was history. You became inseparable, Yoongi becoming a large part of your days and vice versa. His parents eventually became close to yours after the numerous times you both have been dropped off to hang out, or catching rides home after school. Yoongi lived in a nearby neighborhood, only being a good 7 minute walk, to be exact.

Second Quarter: High School, Senior Year

In high school, it became a little different. Yoongi grew up, played varsity basketball and became a fucking jock even though he claimed he would never. Yeah, bullshit. You too, played on the girls varsity basketball team, and surprisingly, you two kept each other close. It was a blessing and a curse though, because you couldn't see your life without Yoongi. He's been there since the 6th grade. However, girls took note of that shit. Trying to use you as their way in to Yoongi's heart, or pants, or both. You made it very clear though that you weren't interested in being a fucking messenger. Girls thought you were mean, but really, they just couldn't handle you. Hence, why you really couldn't relate and be one of them.

Yoongi was still the only person who could understand you and handle you, bad attitude and all. Tomboy habits and all. Not wanting to make friends and all.

"Jesus fucking christ, the day just started." Yoongi says as he watches you toss your duffle bag and backpack aggressively in the back seat of his car. "What's your deal?"

"Nothing, I'm just tired." You slump in his passenger seat after buckling your seat belt.

"Chill, don't start your day like this."

"Whatever, dad." You rolled your eyes, causing him to let out a pathetic chuckle.

"Are you coming to my game later?"

"Yeah, if I'm not too tired from practice."

"Y/N, I always make it to your games even if I'm tired."

"Do you?"

"The fuck? Yes I do. When haven't I?" His tone raises with yours. "Don't try and justify your shit by coming up with lies."

"Yeah, yeah bighead. You'll have plenty of cheerleaders there for you."

"Yeah and?" He smirks. "You're the one I'll be looking for though." He caresses your chin, making you smack his hand away while he laughs loudly.

"You're stupid." You groan as you sink lower in his seat. The rest of the ride to school, you shut your eyes and enjoy the peace before you're having to walk down those annoying, congested hallways.

People rave a lot about senior year, but it honestly hasn't felt special to you. Maybe because you kept the same routine since freshmen year, or maybe you really just didn't care as much as everyone else did about how "special" it was. You've always been locked in to basketball even if your mom wasn't a big fan of it. She wished you were more into cute, girly shit, like makeup, shopping, manis and pedis and dresses and heels, but she came to accept this was the way it was going to be. Especially because your dad was your biggest fan. You came to love basketball, more than just a side hobby. You joined the varsity team and practiced day in and day out. When basketball wasn't in season, you'd play with Yoongi at the park or sign up for camps and tournaments. You just wanted to keep bettering yourself so that you could play in college and get into the league post-grad. Yoongi was the same, and he may or may not have influenced your passion for ball. Either way, he was always supporting you and cheering for you even if the other females hated it.

His ex for sure hated the relationship you had with him even though you really steered clear when she was around. Wasn't your fucking problem or responsibility to take care of her insecurities. Same with his flings.

"Hey, so later, yeah?" He asks in between throwing nods and smiles to girls passing by.

"Mhm." You hum. "You gonna be free for lunch later?"

"I don't know. I know where to find you though if I am."

"Have a good day, punk."

"You too, bub. See you in English." He turns on his heel, walking towards his friends, aka his team members. Aka his jock ass group. Aka the ones females flock to.

Namjoon, Jimin, Eunwoo, Lucas.

They were all pretty boys who knew they were pretty boys and used that to their advantage to make big asshole moves. You hated that Yoonks got pulled in from time to time, but shit, it wasn't your life, you were only a small part of his. Sometimes, they also pulled in the football boys, Jungkook and Seokjin. Even the baseball boys, Hoseok and Taehyung. It was all a huge pretty boy, jock, asshole group in the making outside. A big fucking party for a lot of the girls at school, though.

So even if Yoongi was really the only one in your life, you weren't the only one in his. It is, what it is. As long as he doesn't go switching up on you, then whatever, so be it.

The first half of your classes go by quick, being that you enjoyed your chemistry, french and english classes. You had your english class with Yoongi, Namjoon and Hoseok. You had gotten to know Namjoon and Hoseok a little through it, and it was enough to know that they weren't all that bad. At least in this classroom setting.

"You two going to prom together?" Namjoon asks, making Yoongi snort.

"No, what the hell?" Yoongi responds.

"You guys can have fun at prom." You roll your eyes.

"You're really not gonna go?" Joon bites on the end of his pencil.

"No? The fuck I look like?"

"Y/N, I know it'd be weird as fuck to see you in a dress, but it's senior year. You didn't go last year, did you?" Namjoon asks from Yoongi's other side.

"Really, Namjoon?" You give him a look as if it could state the obvious.

"Well shit, I don't know. I know it's not your thing but can't really say I would have noticed either way." Hoseok laughs, causing you to throw your pen at his head before flicking him off.

"Miss Y/N!" Mrs. Maxwell calls you out mid-movie, eyes wide and in disbelief at how you're acting.

"What?! He started it." You slumped back in your seat and let out a sigh.

"Not another word." She says sternly.

"Not another word." You mock her under your breath.

"Aye, stop. You and that attitude boutta get in some trouble the last weeks of senior year." Yoongi puts his hand on your wrist, causing you to shake your head and click your teeth.

"Anyway, you should go." Hoseok whispers as he leans over on the table to look at you.

"No. Besides, with what date?"

"Take the basketball." Joon snickers.

"You're a complete dumbass, Namjoon. Stop talking." You snap.

"Maybe they're right, bub. It's senior year and it's coming to an end quick. I'd hate for you to regret it." Yoongi turns to you and says lowly.

"You know that won't happen." But really, part of you did feel a little bad. You knew it wasn't your scene, and you really didn't care what people thought of you when it came down to it. However, you always wondered what it would be like if someone liked you. If someone wanted you. Crushed on you so hard that they couldn't keep their hands off of you, couldn't stop thinking of you. Your first love. To feel pleasure, pain. Mixture of emotions simply by being in love. You wondered what it would be like to lose your virginity and have good, good sex. Besides, you were a human with needs. But the only person you have ever been close to was Yoongi. For the most part, you didn't see him that way because you knew he definitely didn't. But, you also couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to take your relationship to that point. If it was anyone, he would be the one you'd have feelings for. He would be your first kiss, your first everything. Because Yoongi was comfort and security for you.

But you valued your friendship more than anything.

"Just saying, think about it." He follows up.

"Think about getting an expensive dress and painful ass heals to wear for one night, just to dance around in 'em and take one professional pic with a date? Maybe get railed if I'm lucky?" You playfully wiggle your eyebrows making Yoongi shake his head.

"Don't be such a party pooper for once."

"Mmm. Great reasoning. Really convincing me here." You laugh it off even though in all honesty, you were thinking about it.

The bell rings and thank god it's finally lunch because you were fucking starving. Appetite and attitude on na-na, no doubt. You silently part ways with Yoongi to stop by your locker and grab your lunch. You make your way to the rowdy ass cafeteria, quickly scanning the room to catch a sight of Yoongi. You see him sitting on top of one of the lunch tables with Hoseok, Namjoon, Jimin and Taehyung sitting around him. Clearly, Yoongi wasn't free today.

"Wassup baby? Wanna trade that ball in for me?" Jimin says as you pass by their table to make your way outside to the bleachers. You flick him off before rolling your eyes and pretending to gag.

"Fuck off, Park." The group laughs except for Yoongi.

"Wonder if she's got that bad attitude in bed, too." Yoongi doesn't hesitate to smack Jimin upside the head because yeah, no matter what, he was gonna protect you as much as possible. "Owwww, I'm just kidding Yoongi."

"Don't let me hear you say that shit around me ever again."

"Fuck, I'm sorry. It was just a joke." Jimin winces as he rubs the back of his head.

"Damn Min Yoonks, why don't you take her ass to prom if it's like that?" Taehyung says, chewed up food coming into full view as he smacks loudly.

"Why don't you learn how to close your mouth first?" Yoongi spits back.

"Y/N is really rubbing off on you."

"It's manners, idiot. You should've been learned that." Namjoon says, laughing.

"But foreel, why won't you take her? You both are close, you've never seen her that way?" Hoseok asks making Yoongi shake his head in response.

"She's my bestfriend. I value her just the way she is, no more no less."

"Ah, you must have thought about it at least once." Yoongi keeps silent. Luckily, the group easily gets distracted and starts paying attention to Seokjin and Jungkook coming over as they talk about the dates they've scored for prom.

Yoongi has thought about it. Still does. Just like he is for you, you're the only one who understands him and takes him for who he is. You know the real him besides basketball player Yoongi. You're the only one who keeps it real. But he would rather keep it this way than ruin things between you and him. He'd hate to fuck up with you because he knows he can fuck up, there's no hiding from it. He'd never forgive himself if he lost you.

Practice is hell today for you and fuck, you really wanna just go home and lay down for the rest of the evening. Coach had you all running suicides and conditioning drills on the courts outside and pulling scrimmages against each other left and right. Let's not forget how coach is always on your ass right before a game too. Hell, she catches an attitude way worse than you before game time and after a loss. You wanted to avoid that at all costs. But, to avoid taking the bus home and instead hitching a ride with Yoongi, you throw on a hoodie and haul your ass to the gym in some nike slippers. You take a seat on a free end at one of the bleachers, holding Spalding in between your legs with your duffle next to you on the floor. The game is off to a start in about 5 minutes, Yoongi catches sight of you on the bleachers and nods. You give him a small smile as a gesture of good luck, which he reciprocates.

The game starts off intensely, both teams scoring closely even with the boys putting straight pressure. Towards the end of the first half, Yoongi and Eunwoo are the leading scorers, putting their team up by 10. Halftime is a bunch of hoo-haa, with cheerleaders in their itty bitty skirts, trying to shake their asses as they cheer for the boys. The boys don't even hide the fact that their ogling, and it's clear as day they all want some pussy. Quite frankly, they walk around thinking they deserve it cause of how hard they try to pull some wins and put the school on the map. Student government comes up for a bit too, pulling some kind of skit to weirdly promote prom. It makes you cringe and in all honesty, it makes you not wanna go even more, but it is your senior year. If you can snag a date, then maybe.

"Hey." Terra [not a cheerleader but still a pretty, popular chick] plops next to you with a smirk on her face. Immediately, you want no part in it because you already know what she's trying to do.

"Hi?"

"I'm just gonna cut straight to it. Do you know if Yoongi is seeing anyone?"

"How the hell would I know, Terra?" You furrow your brows at her.

"Because you're close to him, aren't you?"

"And? Doesn't mean I'm telling people his business. Besides, he's not obligated to tell me everything just cause we're close." She rolls her eyes.

"Whatever. Look, can you do me a favor and give this to him?" She tries handing you a little ass piece of paper folded neatly with a pink heart decorated on the front.

"Why don't you give it to him yourself?"

"That's no fun." You scoff and roll your eyes. Really, miss girl? "Be a doll for once, yeah?" She winks and slips the note in between your wrist and Spalding so it stays put. You take the note and eye it, letting out a deep sigh as you shove it into your pocket. You weren't in the mood to be extra rude today so you'll give it to him later when he drives you home.

The game finally finishes with Yoongi making a final three, the boys keeping their lead up by 10. Everyone cheers and showers the boys with love after the team has finished shaking hands and high-fiving their opponents. You stick around until the crowd dies down, watching Yoongi flirt with Terra as you swing your duffle bag strap onto your shoulder before slowly heading down the bleachers.

"Hey bighead, good game today." You lightly punch him against the chest.

"I knew you'd come."

"Shut up. I'll be at your car."

"For what?"

"Cause you're taking me home, punk."

"No please?"

"Please." He shakes his head and chuckles before you part ways to let him gather his things in the locker room. When you finally catch sight of his teeny head coming towards you from the gym, you hear him unlock his car to let you in while he continues to walk over.

"Fuuuuuck." He says, throwing his things in the back before buckling his seat belt and switching the gear into drive.

"You have fan mail." Yoongi looks over and sees you clutching the note Terra gave you.

"What's that, a condom?"

"You're sick. It's from Terra."

"Who's that again?" You make a face at him.

"You were just telling her sweet nothings earlier after the game?"

"Oh, Terra with the tig o' bitties. Got it." He shakes his head. "I wasn't telling her sweet nothings."

"Right. You're an absolute dipshit, you know?" You prop up a leg on the seat while you unfold the letter.

"Give it!" You move it away from his grasp and begin to read it out loud.

"Yoongi, you're honestly so hot. If you don't have a date for prom, I just want you to know that I'm free, and I promise I'll give you a good time if you take me." You cackle. "Boy, what the fuck is this? Ew."

"Shut up." He blushes before laughing along with you.

"Look at her, writing her coochie out on paper."

"She isn't."

"Oh, really? Pfft." You softly scoff. "So, are you taking her or what?"

"I don't know? Maybe, damn. What about you?"

"What about me, fool? I told you I'd think about it."

"Go with Jimin. He still doesn't have a date." He hates to say it with how much of an asshole Jimin can be, but if it meant you'd be at your senior prom then Yoongi will let it pass. He'll make sure Jimin doesn't try any slick shit.

"Ew, god no."

"Look, I'll make sure he doesn't go overboard. I promise."

"Why do you want me there so badly, Yoongi?"

"Because it's our last year in high school together and I'd really like to celebrate with you somehow." You sigh heavily.

"Fair enough. Let me sit on it."

"Better hurry and stop keeping that seat warm."

"Don't rush me." You punch his arm, causing a groan to erupt from him.

- - -

Really, you'd rather be anywhere than at prom with Park Jimin holding onto your waist the way he is for the pictures you're taking with him, Yoongi and the rest of their group and dates. After all the pictures and fake smiles, you feel him slowly slip his hand down your dress to try and get a grip on your ass, but before you could do so, you're grabbing his wrist with full pressure and making him wince.

"Don't you fucking dare or else I'll cut your dick off and throw it in a blender."

"Aish, ah, fuck! Okay, I'm kidding, let me go!" He whines lowly. You let go of his wrist after one more good squeeze, causing him to wiggle his hand to get the feeling back.

"Get me some punch, will you? My mouth is dry."

"You know, I might know something else that can help." Jimin wiggles his eyebrows as he continues to hold onto his wrist.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me."

"Or not. I'll be back." He accepts defeat by smiling from ear to ear before walking off. You sit off to the side, the heels a huge pain in the ass on top of Jimin already being a huge pain in the ass. You lean over on your knees, completely forgetting you have a short dress on, causing boys passing by to whistle and eye at the easy access.

"The fuck are you looking at? Keep it moving." Yoongi says pushing the guys forward before shooting you a look. "Y/N, really?"

"Shit sorry, I forgot. I'm not used to this." You sit up and adjust your dress before rubbing your arms at how self-conscious you suddenly [and unexpectedly] feel.

"Are you having fun at least?" He sits next to you, manspreading on the seat in the navy suit he has on.

"Mmm, sure." You slightly smile at him. "What about you? You actually took Terra, huh?"

"Yeah, it's pretty fun." He chuckles. "Don't lie, I saw you dancing a bit earlier."

"That's when the alcohol hadn't worn off yet." You snort, remembering Seokjin's older brother giving the group alcohol after all the parents were done taking their pictures of you all. Yoongi laughs along with you before he looks over and simply stares at you, hair all done, makeup done perfectly without it being too much. You in a dress.

"You look beautiful tonight, bub."

"You don't look too bad yourself, bubby." You blush before Jimin interrupts the moment with your cup of punch.

"Here, princess."

"You better not be trying anything slick, punkass." Yoongi says.

"Mm, don't worry. I haven't been able to." You kick his shin as you chug your punch, causing him to cough and choke on his own words. "I'd like to peacefully have this slow dance with you at least, damn." You swallow the last bits of punch before you're taking Jimin's hand to the floor. Yoongi watches as you two make your way to the dance floor for a slow dance, slightly regretting that he didn't just ask you to dance.

"Let's dance, babe." Terra's baby voice comes out as she pulls him up from the seat to find a spot on the dance floor. Yoongi is honestly tired of having to keep up with Terra's energy and her clingy ass, but nonetheless, he was happy you were around for prom.

He was really happy you were around for prom, even though you hated this shit more than anything.

He had you in full view ahead, and so did you. He couldn't help but direct his attention towards you and keep his eyes on you. Fuck, he has never seen anyone so beautiful until you walked through Seokjin's doors with Jimin. Look, let's get this straight. Even though you had your own way of expressing yourself, he always loved your natural beauty, your natural glow. He loved watching you on the court and how happy it made you to play ball. He remembers every accomplishment, every milestone you've reached. How you've grown tremendously as a ball player. He would never admit it to you in person, but he definitely admires how you push yourself and how you always do what you can to improve. Hell, you might just be the better player between the both of you. And when you catch him looking over, he doesn't even try and hide it. He doesn't even care that he's still holding onto Terra and slow dancing with her.

Something within you flips. You feel that shit in the pit of your stomach, at the heat of your core.

But, you brush it off and break eye contact first, even if he doesn't stop staring. This couldn't happen, no. This was your bestfriend. You weren't gonna let the things you felt get in the way of that.

Nope.

Suddenly, the song changes to something more upbeat and twerkable, Jimin taking the opportunity to spin you around and grind on you. You really need a distraction anyway, something to rid you of those god awful thoughts about your bestfriend, so you let him and you have fun with it. Everyone around you is having fun anyway, and fuck, you wouldn't have to do this ever again so fuck it.

"Let me get a dance with my bestfriend." Yoongi says to Jimin.

"Go dance with your date!"

"Shut up and switch for a second!" Yoongi says, pushing him off of you so he could get behind and dance with you.

"Yoonks, what the hell?" You laugh.

"Go with it, bub. It's fucking senior year, we're graduating soon." You go with his movements, having the time of your life with everyone around you as prom quickly comes to a close.

When you get into Jimin's car, you knock off your heels as he continues to talk nonstop about the night. Jimin was a cutie but god, you could not stand his mindset for the life of you. You were grateful he had agreed to take you to prom, but damn. Prom was done and all you wanted was some peace and quiet.

"I hope you had fun with me tonight." You give him a toothless smile before slipping your heels back on.

"I did, thank you for taking me. Really." He smiles from ear to ear before leaning over near your seat.

"Can I get just one good smooch for the night?" You look at him before you smirk and lean over near his lips.

"Sure." You whisper.

"Oh fuck, this is actually happening."

"Close your eyes, I know you don't fucking kiss with your eyes open. What are you doing?"

"Right. Sorry." He closes his eyes and puckers his lips. You lean in a little closer, feeling his breath against your lips.

Then you flick his nose.

"Ouch!"

"Peace out, Park." You throw open his door to step out and shut it behind you to quietly walk into your house.

The lights are off and your parents are already tucked into the room for the night, leaving you a note on the fridge reminding you to make sure all the doors are locked before retreating to your room. You do as you're reminded before quietly shutting your door and tossing your heels to the side. You let the pins down from your hair, ruffling it around a bit and relieving any pressure on your head. Before turning away from your dresser, you notice a letter from the one university you had been waiting on. You had been waiting to hear back from Stanford for the longest time, and quite frankly, you had been upset you hadn't heard especially when their scouts were at your game awhile ago.

You had broken down to your parents, to Yoongi, automatically assuming the worst when you heard that other people had already been accepted and scouted for Stanford. Suddenly, you found yourself working harder and harder because you felt like you were lacking in so many areas. You felt low, and like your dream was running miles and miles away from you. Faster than you could keep up.

You take the letter in your hand, but don't want to open it because you don't feel ballsy enough [surprisingly]. You call up Yoongi, not caring that he could possibly be in the middle of getting his dick wet.

"Sup?"

"Are you busy?"

"I was just about to walk into my house."

"Oh, nevermind."

"Need me to come by?"

"I got a letter from Stanford."

"Shit, I'll be there in 2 mins."

And in 2 minutes, he surely was knocking at your window. You slide it up enough for him to climb in, Yoongi still in his prom get-up as well.

"Here." You instantly hand him the letter.

"What, why me? It should be you."

"I can't, I really can't." He sighs.

"Are you sure you won't regret this?"

"No, bub. Please." You sit on the bed and fiddle with your fingers as you watch him rip the envelope open and tear out the letter. You can't even keep your eyes on him as he reads the letter and starts backing away from you.

"Shit."

"What? What?!" You stand, trying your best to keep your tone low. He covers his mouth, causing you to pinch his bicep at how dramatic he was being. "Just say it!"

"You're not going." Your heart sinks, but before you could process it, Yoongi speaks up again. "To any other college because Stanford wants you."

"I'm going to fucking kill you!" You whisper and shove him.

"Congrats, bubby. Guess we'll be together in college too." Your eyes widen.

"Y-you're going? T-to Stanford?" He smiles and nods.

"Yeah, I am."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Look, I just wanted to give you your space. That's all. I found out before you went all cry baby on me."

"Shut up." You say before laughing and jumping into his arms, throwing your legs around his torso while he swings you around. As he sets you back down onto your bedroom floor, your hands linger around his neck, gently tugging on the hair that rested there. He keeps you close, his hands resting around your waist as your chests are still touching. You honestly have no idea what takes over you— perhaps all the feelings you felt tonight at prom taking over, or feeling overjoyed from finally hearing back from Stanford, you couldn't decide. But you crash your lips against his, immediately pulling back after you realized you've just kissed your bestfriend.

You just had your first fucking kiss through accidental causes.

Well, shit.

Was it accidental or no?

Mind is going off on a tangent.

"Woah. I'm so sorry, Yoonks, I—" He doesn't allow for any space between you two, keeping your body flush against his as his lips crash onto yours again to cut you off. To be quite honest, things are moving fast and the kiss deepens quick. You follow his motions, gaining some rhythm as your tongue dances along with his in the [now] wet, sloppy kiss.

"Wait, Y/N." He pulls away as the moment intensifies. "A-are you sure you wanna keep going? To be honest, I don't know if I'll be able to hold myself back and I know you haven't exactly—" He knows it would be your first time and he wasn't sure how he felt about it. I mean, sure, he loved you. You were special to him. But he wanted to make sure your first time was also special, whether it be him or whoever else.

"Please. I want this. I wanna do this with you."

By the looks of tonight, it seems like it's meant to be him.

You press your lips back onto his with the same intensity and start to unbutton his shirt when you feel his hands hike up your dress. He gently pushes you on the bed, crawling over to you as he kicks off his shoes and finishes ripping off his shirt and tie. He slowly removes the straps of your dress down your shoulders and undoes the zipper on the side before slipping it down and leave you in your panties.

You had no bra on.

Yoongi's eyes widen when he realizes such, your cheeks heating up while you watch him stare down your body. You begin to feel incredibly self-conscious so you cover your chest with an arm. Yoongi senses your uneasiness, your confidence shooting down below zero.

"You're beautiful, bub. Don't." He says, gently tugging your arm away and letting it fall limply to the side. You simply nod and let him take the reigns because you had no idea what the fuck you were doing. So many emotions were flooding your mind— you were nervous, you were scared, you were shy, you felt lost and too innocent under Yoongi, even if he knew you like the back of his hand.

And because of that, he could pick up on it with the way your body continued to tense up. He shook off his pants, leaving on his boxers until you were ready for him. Cause fuck, he was ready for you, but he had to take this slow. He had to take care of you.

He lowers himself onto you after the two of you have climbed under the sheets, lowering his head against your neck to press light, feathery kisses along the surface. You felt the tingles shoot down your spine every time his lips made contact, causing you to softly gasp and arch your back at how sensitive you were already feeling.

"If you ever feel uncomfortable, just tell me to stop okay?" He says lowly. You nod in response, Yoongi taking it as leverage to plant a kiss on your lips before moving down to your breasts. He keeps his eyes on you, making sure you don't seem uncomfortable in the slightest bit. But you don't, and it's indicated in the way you bite your bottom lip and arch your back at the way his tongue wraps around your hardened bud. He does the same on the other breast before peppering kisses down your stomach and abdomen.

"Yoongi." You slightly gasp, shy at how unusually close he is to your lady friend.

"What's wrong? Want me to stop?" His thumbs gently caressed your thighs as his head hovered over your pelvis. You shake your head and nervously swallow before speaking once more.

"I-I'm just scared, what if you don't like—"

"Shh." He shushes you. "You're everything to me, you know that. You don't have to change just so I could enjoy you in bed. I'll take good care of you, bub. I promise."

"O-okay." He nods, placing a kiss over your clothed clit before pulling them down to get lost within your sheets. He swipes a finger down your folds, causing your breathing to hitch slightly. You watch as he slowly inserts the same digit inside of you, biting onto his bottom lip watching your facial expressions turn from uncertainty to straight pleasure. "Another." You moan.

"You sure?"

"Yes, please." He inserts another digit, curling his fingers upward as he starts to finger fuck you at a steady pace.

"Shit, you're so wet Y/N." He says lowly before lowering his mouth onto you to get a taste and tease your clit. You gasp at the overwhelming sensation, feeling the pleasure bubbling in your core and you had no idea how to deal with it. He picks up his pace while tonguing your clit and sucking at the right pressure until suddenly, you short circuit and tremble under his grip. You purse your lips together to prevent yourself from moaning too loud with your parents at the other end of the hall [jesus fucking christ], knuckles turning white as you grip the sheets tightly.

Your first orgasm came and washed over you quick.

"Did you just—" He removes his digits from inside of you, drooling at your cum accumulating all over his fingers.

"Holy fuck." You whisper as you regulate your breathing, twitching when Yoongi places a quick kiss on your pussy before coming back up to you.

"How was that?"

"So good. Wanna feel you." You whine, tugging him down towards you.

"I got you, bubby." He says, kissing your jaw, cheek, nose and lips. He reaches over into his pants on the floor, grabbing a condom out of his pocket. You furrow your brow and chuckle, confused if this was something he always did.

"You just carry that around?"

"The guys and I split on a box and carried one each for tonight. Just in case."

"Total fucking assholes." He chuckles.

"Better safe than not, right?" He rips it open with his teeth, spitting the wrapper out onto the floor before rolling it down his cock. He was perfectly thick and long, and it made you a nervous wreck all over again thinking about how this could feel. "Ready? I'll go slow." You nod. You immediately felt immense pressure when you felt Yoongi dip his body and slowly enter you. You winced, Yoongi immediately pausing until you tapped his arm to continue. And so he does, and you continue to breathe through it until he bottoms out and lets out a soft groan against your neck. "Fuck, you're so tight bub. God, you're gonna make me cum quick." He slowly pumps in and out, steadying his pace when he feels you buck your hips up to go along with his motions.

The pleasure skyrocketed; You shut your eyes, letting yourself be in this moment. Feel this moment.

He picks it up a little faster, careful not to bang your headboard against the wall. His forehead is pressed against yours, watching as you let out soft whimpers against his lips.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck. Yoongi-Yoongi—" You whispered. "You're gonna make me—" It was becoming overwhelming, your clit rubbing against him as he steadied his pace and continued to fuck into you. He nods, pressing a kiss against your forehead.

"Yeah, that's it. Let go. It's okay." And that was enough for you to reach your second orgasm tonight. Quick, but fuck. Yoongi made you feel so good, and you wouldn't want it any other way. You shut your eyes as you hurdled over the edge, mouth open with silent, inaudible moans being released. "So fucking pretty." Yoongi says as he feels himself reaching his high with the way your walls pulsated against his cock.

God. So, so good.

He holds onto the headboard and quickly fucks into you until he's spilling his seed in the condom, muffled moans being released against the crook of your neck. It takes a moment before Yoongi raises his head, your hands running through his black hair while he presses a tender kiss against your lips. He slowly removes himself, wrapping the condom in a tissue before tossing it into your trash can. He plops next to you and welcomes you into his arms, caressing you to soothe you from your first time.

"You okay?"

"More than okay." You say, the both of you trying to savor the moment before trying to navigate where to go from here.

What now?

Third Quarter: College, Junior Year (Present)

You bent down, hands resting against your knees as you tried to catch your breath during the timeout Coach Chu had called with 5.2 seconds literally left on the clock. He laid out the play he wanted you and the team to pull off in order to gain the win over Berkeley.

It had to be executed perfectly. No flaws.

Coach Chu had been riding your ass since you were a freshman. But, over the years, you've learned how to work through his tough love and turn it into positives, bettering yourself on and off the floor. It paid off, and he saw the fire in you, finally moving you up to starting point guard right before the season ended. Some team members hated it at first, but eventually, grew to work with it as well.

The plan was to have you come down into the paint and lay up the ball or take a shot at the very last second to avoid Berkeley from getting another chance at scoring. Sometimes you hated the pressure, but you've also learned that a big part of playing ball was thriving under pressure.

Your team closes up the huddle before you and your teammates are heading back out onto the floor to try and get this win. You shake off the nerves, bouncing the ball out of bounds until you check it in with your teammate. After that— it was like a blur. Shit happened so quick, you couldn't even process it. You passed the ball and dashed over to the other side of the court while your teammate put up a screen. You rose your hand as you ran into the paint, adrenaline rushing through your veins as you awkwardly lay up the ball in the position you were in and stumble onto the ground from losing your footing. You turn your head as the buzzer went off, noticing that the ball had bounced off the rim.

You missed a fucking lay up.

How could you miss a fucking lay up?

"Fuck!" You cry as you sit up and smack the floor.

"Aye, it's all good girl! Ain't a big deal! You win some, you lose some! We still got a ways to go!" Your teammate [roommate, and closest college friend] Clarice said as she helped you up. She was right, but every loss to you was a big loss no matter what. Coach was for sure gonna drill you about this too, and you were already mentally preparing.

"Thanks." You mumble. You look out at the disappointed crowd slowly dispersing, wishing you could still catch a familiar face in the crowd.

But, Yoongi hadn't been to your game in years. So you thought. You never caught him if he ever stepped foot into your game.

Your head hung low as the familiar feeling of pain and loneliness came rushing back while you headed to the locker room. Too bad you didn't see him hiding out on the side of the bleachers with Lucas.

"Y/N, a word." Coach Chu says, leading you into his office.

Fuck, here we go.

You shut the door behind you and stand awkwardly in front of his desk, fiddling with your fingers.

"Look, I just want to say that you put on hell of a show tonight, win or lose. We still have plenty of games left, plenty of opportunities to lock in play-offs. Alright? Don't be upset."

"Thanks Coach." You give him a tiny smile.

"Are you doing okay?"

"Uh, yeah. I think so."

"What's on your mind?"

"Nothing coach, just been a hectic couple of weeks." In which, it was no lie. You crammed for test after test, project after project. You barely had any time to breathe this year.

"Well, my door is always open if you need to chat." You nod. "I'll see you at practice. Enjoy your night."

"Thanks again." You say as you exit his office and get yourself showered and into comfier clothes.

Meanwhile, Yoongi heads back to his dorm room alongside Lucas, hands dug deep into his pockets while his head hung low.

"You ever gonna talk to her?"

"I don't know." He sighs. "Pretty sure I fucked up any chance of that."

"Look, dude. You haven't really been the same since you and Y/N fell out." Yoongi stays silent as they slowly climb the steps up to their room. "Why are you just gonna leave it like this? It's been so long already. Doesn't it bother you?"

"Positive she doesn't want me around." Lucas shakes his head.

"You haven't even tried. You just gave up and that shit is cold, to be honest. I know Y/N always held it down for you, I would have expected you to do the same." The words cut through Yoongi so deep, he doesn't even know how to respond and leaves it at that.

As you heavily dragged your body back to the dorms and took your sweet ol' time, your mind began to wander back to Yoongi as well. After he had taken your virginity that night, things took a turn for the worst.

He treated you differently, created this distance that allowed you to grow farther and farther apart from each other until he was no longer in your grasp and vice versa.

You went from Yoongi being a part of your every day to nothing. And fuck, did it hurt you. You cried and cried, until you were so tired of crying. You had to pick yourself up and keep it moving no matter what. Life waits for nobody.

You reminisce on those days of debating over who could really be considered the greatest. Although, you did pay your respects to the bigs, the greats— Kobe, Magic, MJ, Lebron— you paid respect where it was rightfully due. However, Derrick Rose at his prime? Rajon Rondo? Chris Paul?

Hell, even Baron Davis, Monte Ellis. Rookie Steph Curry? Shiiit. They were it for you, and Yoongi used to dog your ass on how unrealistic you were being.

That was all gone.

He must be having a ball watching Steph climb up those charts now, though. You wonder what he would say to you.

The days of going to basketball games, to each other's basketball games, to ordering hella pizza and creating chaos in either house over the dunk contest during the NBA All Star Week or yelling all around the living room and jumping on couches during the NBA playoff season and championship games— All gone.

If you knew this would drastically change you and Yoongi, you would have never let that night happen. You continued to put on your brave face, your thick, tough skin even though deep down, it took everything in you to suppress the hurt, betrayal and confusion. Even after all these years.

He meant everything to you. Did you not to him? You could never understand until this day. How could he dispose of you so, so quickly?

You see him on campus and quickly break any eye contact, or run the opposite way. You were tired of doing this even though you felt like you needed closure. Some explanation. You deserved it. But you weren't gonna initiate that. Even if Yoongi did, you don't even know if things could ever go back to the way it was. He promised he would never hurt you, but he has. He still is hurting you. The wounds— it cut deep. Deeper than he could ever imagine.

"Hello?" You smile, hearing your dad on the other line.

"Hey dad."

"Hey baby! How was your game? I'm sorry I couldn't catch it tonight, work kept me behind." You sigh.

"Eh, it's probably good you didn't. Didn't turn out so well." He picks up on how your voice cracks ever so slightly, enough to indicate that you were trying your hardest not to break down about your performance. "I missed the winning shot."

"Oh sweetheart, you'll get 'em next time. You always do. You still have a couple of games left don't you?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't change the fact that I played shitty as hell tonight."

"There's always room for improvement, only way to go is up from here right?" He says softly, making you smile. "You'll get 'em next time, I have no doubt. You always know how to better yourself even when I think you've already reached your highest potential."

"Thanks Dad. You always were my number one fan."

"I still am." He chuckles. "How's everything else? School?"

"Fine." He always has to stop himself from asking about Yoongi, even to ask if there's been the slightest change to your relationship.

"You sure?"

"Course." You lie.

"Alright, well you know me and your mom are here for you if you need anything."

"I know."

"I'll let you go and get some rest, alright? Don't be so hard on yourself."

"Mmm, I'll try." You chuckle. "I love you."

"Love you too. And hey, baby?"

"Yeah?"

"Always remember that you deserve everything good in this world. If someone can't handle you at your worse, they sure as hell don't deserve you at your best."

"Thank you." You smile as if your dad can see you through the phone before hanging up and unlocking your dorm door.

"Sigma Nu party going on tonight, wanna come and slide through?" Clarice asks as she watches you toss your duffle aside.

"I'm tired, not in the mood."

"So aren't I, but I think we both need it. Come on girl, just for a little." You sigh. Clarice had also been there by your side since you both were freshmen recruits. One day, she came into the room and found you a crying mess, causing her to wrap her arms around you and craddle you until you calmed down. You had spilled the beans about Min Yoongi, especially when he quickly became the talk of the campus as a ladies man and one of the best freshmen recruits Stanford has ever seen. You hated it, but a part of you still found yourself happy that he was getting the recognition he deserved as a ball player.

He wasn't the tallest, or the biggest, but boy had heart and played every game like it was his last. You had been his number one fan, and even though you hated him, that fact would never change.

Anyways, without Clarice, you weren't sure where you'd be. Definitely not here because you'd be too busy running away from your past and all the issues that came with it.

Yeah, yeah. Go ahead and say it. You would be stupid enough to not go to your first choice just because of a stupid boy.

"Fine, fine. I'm leaving as soon as someone wants to start acting up and getting all crazy though."

"Deal." She chuckles. You've learned how to dress up a little more— and by a little we mean baggy sweats, a crop tight fitting tee and chapstick. No way in hell you'd get dolled up for a party. Out of the years you've already been here, you probably went to two parties. One being the party Coach Chu threw at his house for a record-breaking season. The other was a legit party that you stepped foot in for all of 2 seconds before you figured it was time to head home, especially after seeing Yoongi hugged up with some chick and disgustingly tonguing her down while groping her ass.

Shit, you were never gonna get used to it.

The frat house is fucking packed and wreaks of weed even down the corner. You and Clarice push your way through, greeting people who were acknowledging your presence and waving at your other teammates that were also present.

"More basketball babes have arrived, let's go!" One of the frat guys cheers as you and Clarice make your way to the kitchen where all the alcohol is laid out.

"One shot?" She asks as she already has her hand wrapped around the Svedka handle.

"One and done." You tell her. You shouldn't have let her pour the shot though because now, you're stuck with nasty ass vodka near the halfway mark of the cup. "Clarice, what the fuck is this?"

"It's called savoring our one."

"You're fucked up." You joked as you tap your cup against hers and take the shot in three chugs. "Really fucked up." You wince.

"Come, lets go see what the other girls are up to and hang out for a bit." You follow her lead to the corner of the living room, chatting it up with your team before dancing around in the little corner you all occupied— keeping as far away as possible from sloppy and messy dudes.

You turned to eye the crowd at some point, catching Yoongi coming down the stairs, a female following from behind holding his hand. Then, they disappear to the outside of the house. You swallow the lump in your throat, the room feeling hotter than it already was.

Why he still had this affect on you, you had no idea.

Clarice and your teammates are too busy cracking jokes that they don't realize you've slipped away to get some air. You're finding that the crowd has come bigger in the short amount of time you've been here and navigating through it has become difficult. You're having to bob, weave and shove your way out, letting out a sigh the closer you get to the front of the house. You're also really glad you've been able to steer clear from—

"Shit, my bad." You unintentionally bump into someone making your way to the front from the side of the house due to you keeping your head low.

"Y/N?" You whip your head around to see Yoongi raising a brow, dropping his arm from the same chick's shoulders.

"Hi." You give him a fake, tight-lipped smile and rush your way to the front of the house. Thank god you finally make it because you were starting to feel claustrophobic, even being outside. However, you weren't prepared for Yoongi to come after you and grab your wrist the way he did.

"Wait, I didn't expect you to be here." Out of defense, you quickly snatch your wrist away from his grip and furrow your brows at him.

"Yeah, and now I'm leaving."

"Why, hang out for a bit—"

"And what, Yoongi? Watch you be the life of the party? Watch you walk around all fine and dandy like shit never happened between us?" You feel the tears welling up on your bottom lids, but you promised yourself you would never cry over him again. You refuse to. He had already taken up so much of you that you refuse to give him any more.

"Is that what you really think?" He says, the hurt apparent in his expression. To be frank, no. Yoongi really, really never meant to hurt you. And just like he had mentioned before, he would never forgive himself if he ever hurt you. He hasn't forgiven himself. He hasn't forgiven himself for how he let you slip out of his grasp when it was his own fault for pushing aside his feelings for you. He thought the world of you, the only woman who kept it real with him and stuck by him through the highest of highs, lowest of lows. There was no one as special as you, no one who could ever be as special as you, no matter how many times he tried to sink his dick into other females.

No one was real like you.

But, he was also conflicted because of that. He felt like he couldn't give you the love you rightfully deserved, he didn't think he could love you properly. He had so much to learn and he didn't wanna hurt you in the process. It sounds so fucking stupid [because it is] that he thought distancing himself was better than just being honest. He was a dumbass high schooler, he didn't know any better. But, he never meant to make you feel special for one night, then run from it. You were always special to him. You had always been. You always will be. And these past years hurt like a bitch, but he coudn't find the words to explain. Eventually, he just believed he would do less damage if you both remained distant this way.

Although, he longed for you. He really needed you just as you needed him. He always has, always will.

So when the two of you bump into each other tonight, he felt like maybe, it was a sign. Maybe it was time to stop being childish.

God, he missed your face.

God, he was a fucking asshole.

"No, I'm not doing this shit." You shake your head. "Just— continue to stay away from me, okay? I'm better off without you." The words sting you, but it doesn't sting you as much as it stings Yoongi. You glare at him once more before you turn on your heel and begin walking down the street to head back to your dorm.

"Y/N! Wait up!" Clarice calls for you, eyeing Yoongi as she passes him to catch up with you down the street. "Hey, hey. You okay?" She swings her arm around you when she catches you silently crying to yourself. "What did he do, Y/N?"

"He fucking exists, that's what." You groan. "Ugh, fuck! I'm not supposed to be crying over his dumbass, I'm better than this Clarice— Why the fuck am I crying over it?" You break down, crouching down to your knees, causing Clarice to hover over you and pull you into a hug.

"Maybe you just need to let it out and stop forcing yourself to not feel anything."

"I hate him, I hate him, I hate him." You bawled into your arms. "I hate him so much." She caressed your back. "But he still finds a way to mean so much to me."

"I think it's time for you two to talk."

"I can't. It's just better this way."

"Are you sure? Because look at you, Y/N. You're a mess, and this hasn't even been the first time you broke down about him. As much as you want to believe that you're fine without him, you're not. He was your bestfriend and I think you need him more than you even know yourself."

"He's doing fine without me."

"You don't know that, baby. Dudes are annoying as fuck because they can literally go on about their day and mask that shit well. If he's ready, let him explain. Hear him out. You both may be misunderstanding the entire situation." It takes you a good minute before you can finally gather yourself and make it back to your dorm room with Clarice.

She was right.

But you were so angry more than anything. You were angry and you weren't sure how you could get past it.

He left your side.

And so the next day, you go about your day in class, staying quieter than usual during practice. For the most part, Coach Chu was always on your ass because of how vocal you were and how much you caught an attitude when things didn’t go the way you'd like it to. So, to see you this quiet, almost sullen even, concerns him. But, he already pressed you once and he wasn't gonna do it again to avoid irritating you any further.

You run the usual conditioning drills, practicing play by play before a final scrimmage game for the night. You push yourself hard like you always do, almost coming out of practice dry heaving from how tired you are. It was your bad habit though, you wouldn't quit until you got it right. Until you felt right. And unfortunately, it's another one of those nights where you feel unsatisfied with your performance. So, you take it upon yourself to continue practicing in the empty gym that was set to close within the next hour. You're tired out of your mind, and you know this is probably a bad idea, but you can't shake off the feeling of dissatisfaction. To you, that was the next worst thing. Right behind Yoongi.

You begin to work on your three pointers, lay ups and shots out of range before you start to play a scrimmage game with yourself.

"I'll play you." You suddenly hear, the sweat beads dripping down your forehead at this point. You watch Yoongi as he drops his water bottle off at the side of the court before walking over to you.

"Go away."

"Afraid you'll lose?"

"No, I just don't wanna play your ass." You shot up the ball, only for it to bounce off the backboard and land in Yoongi's hand.

"Ball up. Let's play till 10."

"Why the hell do you wanna play me, Yoongi? Don't you have a random chick to bone?"

"I'm clearly standing right in front of you aren't I? Quit fucking talking and play." He aggressively passes you the ball to check it in, you following suit, making the ball damn near bounce off of his chest with how hard you pass it back. He knew exactly how to rile you up.

You get into the zone quickly, trying to find some kind of redemption for the way you had been feeling lately. Redemption, validation, way to take the edge off— anything, really. It was only until the first person scored to 10, but Yoongi was putting up one hell of a fight, jet black hair parted down the middle and matted to his forehead from the sweat building up. You take the lead, sitting at 8 while Yoongi sat at a sad 6 points.

"Ball." You call out as you scored a layup, ramming yourself against the padded wall with the force you had put up.

"That's 10."

"Ball, Yoongi." You huffed and puffed.

"Stop, don't overwork yourself. You just got—"

"Suddenly you care? Stop being a pussy and pass me the goddamn ball." He furrows his brows as he passes you the ball, crouching down to meet you at eye level to try and guard you. You run towards the right of the court, pulling a pump fake before you pivot to get away from Yoongi's guard. You pivot hard and drive it up to the basket, only to fall on the wrong footing and twist your ankle on the way down. "Ouch, fuck!"

"Shit, Y/N!" Yoongi comes to your side, hand supporting your back as the other is on your ankle.

"I'm fine, leave me—"

"Stop being so fucking stubborn and let me help you." He says angrily. You don't say anything else while you fix your position on the floor. "Can you wiggle it at least?"

"Y-yeah." You wince as you wiggle your foot and roll it around a couple of times. Phew, at least this shit wasn't gone for good. But Coach Chu still wouldn't be happy to hear you sprained your ankle releasing your anger on Yoongi during a dumb game. Yoongi helps you stand, arm around your waist as he throws your arm around his neck and holds you steady by the wrist.

"Try walking on it."

"I can, but it hurts a little." Yoongi sighs.

"You just sprained it. Let's go get you some ice or something at the nursing center before going back to your dorm." You silently nod as you hang onto Yoongi for extra support, careful not to make the situation any worse than it already is. He has you sit on the chair within the nursing center, the nurse coming over to wrap your ankle nicely before giving you crutches and some instant hot compress to pop onto it. She orders for security to drive you two over to the dorm building in their go-cart so that you wouldn't have to do much walking on your foot while you focused on healing.

Yoongi doesn't leave your side, even after you've walked into your dark, empty dorm room, not really knowing where Clarice is at right now [possibly library]. He shuts your door and sits you on the edge of your bed, setting your crutches near your bed side and your instant hot compress.

"You need anything else?" Your head hangs low as you slightly chuckle and shake your head.

"Why are you doing this?" You ask him lowly before looking back up at him, tears clouding your vision. "Hm? Why, Yoongi?"

"You're hurt, why wouldn't I—"

"Hmm." You hum. "I'm hurt? So where the fuck were you after prom night? When I was hurt then, where the fuck have you been?" You began to cry.

"Y/N." His tongue swipes over his lips before he sighs. "I'm sorry." He says, close to a whisper.

"Are you? Because I don't think you really understand how bad you hurt me." You aggressively wipe away your tears while continuing to look at him, his body language soft and full of regret. "You didn't care about me."

"How could you say that? I cared—" He sighs as his head drops for a second. "I care about you more than you know."

"If you did then why the fuck was it so easy for you to drop me the way you did?!" You yelled. "You just don't do that to the people you care about, especially if it’s your bestfriend."

"Look, you're right. I have no excuse for the way I acted, and if I could turn back time to re-do it, I would. But I can't, and the only thing I can do is apologize and do my best to make it up to you." His bottom lip trembles as he steps closer to you, a small frown forming at the corners of his mouth.

"Yoongi." You cried. "I did everything for you, I stuck by you through everything, even during the times you didn't deserve that shit from me. But I stayed! I stood by you because you meant everything to me and god—" You groaned. "I needed you. I needed you and you weren't there! I fucking hate you for doing this shit to me but part of me will always have love for you no matter how fucked up the situation is. I will always drop everything for you. I will always care about you, and it's so unfair." It broke Yoongi's heart and he didn't know what to say, but he wraps his arms around you anyway, keeping you in a tight hug against his chest. He's surprised that you let him, even more surprised at how he feels your body soften under his touch.

"Fuck, I'm so, so sorry bub." He says lowly as he presses a kiss on top of your head. "I'm so sorry."

"Please don't ever go again." You cry against his chest.

"No, I'm not. I'm gonna be right here." He says hugging you tighter. "You're the only one who's ever understood me, who's ever kept it real with me. I don't deserve you, but I know damn sure I'll work hard to make up for letting you go in the first place." He places another kiss on top of your head. "I'm right here. Not going anywhere. I'm so sorry."

- - -

"THE STANFORD BOYS TAKE THE CHAMPIONSHIP!" The commentator screams into his mic, Yoongi running a lap around the court before he's cheering loudly with his teammates and joining the group hug. You run down the bleachers, dashing straight into Yoongi's arms while he swings you around.

"That's what I'm fucking talking about!" You squeal and giggle as Yoongi places you back down and plants multiple kisses around your face, hands resting on the small of your back.

"Let's get out of here." He whispers in your ear.

"I'll wait at your car, bighead." You wink, causing him to smile that gummy smile of his that you adore more than life itself.

There's obviously a huge party going on tonight to celebrate this huge achievement, but Yoongi says he doesn't wanna join for once. He's happy, yeah. But the way he wants to celebrate is in peace. After so long, he feels like he can finally say he's content with where his life is at and where it's going. He drives over to the nearest beach, backing into a space so the both of you could sit in the back and try catching all the shooting stars up above. Yoongi leans against the side of the trunk, allowing you to lay your head on his lap while you curled up beside him listening to the waves slowly crash against the sand.

"Saw one." He says, looking up at the sky.

"You're a punk, no you didn't."

"What?" He laughs. "How are you about to say that? I caught it with my own two eyes."

"Oop! I saw one!"

"Now that's a lie. I was looking up too."

"Shut up." You laugh, causing Yoongi to tickle you along the sides before he stops and plants a kiss on your lips. It's silent for a minute while the two of you take in the night view— The sky and ocean coming together as one, forming a view that seemed endless.

"Hey."

"Hm?" You hum as Yoongi's fingers gently brush through your hair.

"You know I love you right?"

"Ew with the sappy shit, Min Yoongi." He laughs.

"Seriously."

"I know." You smile up at him. "I love you too."

"Come here." He says softly, tugging you upwards. You sit up, allowing Yoongi to press his lips against yours. He pulls you in by your shirt, having you straddle his lap while he grips onto your hips and immediately grinds against you. You let out a small moan feeling how quickly he hardened, his cock hitting you in the right places as you continue to grind on him. "Fuck, wanna feel you babygirl."

"Here?"

"Yeah." He chuckles and bites onto his bottom lip.

"What, all of a sudden you're scared?"

"Fuck off." You fire back, releasing his hardened member from its confines as you stroke him gently. He tilts his head back in pleasure before tugging your shorts and panties to the side, enough for him to cop a feel of how wet you are.

"Baby's all wet."

"What're you gonna do about it?" You whisper against his lips, biting onto his bottom lip and pulling back slightly. He hisses at the sensation before he moves your hand from his cock and takes control. He pushes you upward, positioning you enough to line up with your entrance.

"Take this shit off."

"Yoongi, we're in public."

"So, you're all talk and no play."

"I hate you."

"Nobody's here." He groans. "Just take off your shorts, pleeease." He begs as he slowly strokes himself. You toss aside your shorts, Yoongi immediately hooking his finger at the bottom of your panties and tugging it aside in order to push himself into you. He does enough before he lets you do the rest of the work and sink down on his length, a gasp leaving your throat as you take all of him in. He grips your hips tightly, setting the pace as he groans into your neck, your fingers tangled in his hair resting at the nape of his neck.

"Shit, babe." You moan as you tilt your head back.

"Fuck, you always ride me so well." He presses light kisses against your neck before he's nipping at the surface.

"Godddd why do you feel so good?" You whimper.

"You like how I feel inside of you?" You nod. "Yeah? Like how my cock fills you up?"

"Never gonna get tired of it." You moan, Yoongi making you pick up the pace aggressively. Besides the waves crashing, the lewd noises of skin slapping against skin fills the car, along with your soft moans and Yoongi's groans. Your clit is constantly rubbing against him, causing the pleasure to build so quickly it becomes overwhelming. You try to hold off as much as you can but—

"My pretty baby. All I fucking need." He almost growls, the words enough to send you over the edge. You let out a loud moan, not even caring for the houses nearby as your orgasm hits hard and ripples throughout your body, sending aftershocks. Yoongi continues to have you ride him fast and hard, the overwhelming sensation causing a hint of pain to mix with more pleasure until you feel him feel you up. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He groans as his nails dig into your skin, giving two good thrusts upwards into you to help ride out his high. You both sit in the position for a minute, trying to come back down from your highs. Yoongi gives you a delicate peck on the lips, smiling into the kiss before he pulls away. "Swear you're all I need."

"See, I don't know if I could say the same." He smacks your ass as you hike up and off of him to put on your shorts.

"Take it back."

"I'm kidding." You blush.

"My ride or die. Are you with me?"

"Always have been. Are you?"

"You know I am."

"Good. You know it takes two." He smiles before pulling you into another hug and pressing a kiss against your temple.

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reidgraygubler · 3 years

Text

goldilocks (reid/reader)

Title: Goldilocks Request: no Couple: spencer reid/gen-neutral!reader; spencer reid/ethan; spencer reid/lila archer Category: fluff Content Warning: bi!spencer, kissing/making out, Word Count: 2,102 Summary: spencer recounts all his first kisses A/N: thank you all so much for the support! i really do appreciate it. check out my masterlist!

{***}{***}{***}

When Spencer was 12, he had his first kiss. He was with his only friend, Ethan, in his backyard. They were playing cowboys versus pirates- Spencer being the cowboy rightfully so. Whenever Ethan was over Spencer knew he could be himself, he didn’t have to worry about his mother, or school bullies, or anything else. Ethan was his safe space. Ethan knew that, too.

It was nearing dusk. Ethan was up in a tree, pretending it was the crow’s nest of his pirate ship. Spencer was on the ground, dressed like a cowboy, complete with the lasso and cowboy hat. Their play fight would soon come to an end, and they would have to go in for the night. The two friends knew that their fight would come to an end like it usually does. With Ethan winning and Spencer losing.

Ethan had jumped from the tree, landing beside Spencer before tackling him to the ground. Spencer looked up at his friend, trying to fight him off his body. It was obvious that the smaller of the two boys would lose a fight. The smaller boy knew that too. Although maybe he wanted to lose to Ethan.

“What are you doing?!” Spencer said through giggles. Ethan returned the giggles as he pinned Spencer’s hands to the ground above his head. Ethan looked down at his friend, a smirk growing across his lips the longer he stared at him.

“I won,” Ethan whispered as he lowered closer to Spencer’s face.

Spencer’s eyes widened as he looked at his friend. The young boy knew for a long time that he had a crush on his friend. He’s never acted on his feelings before. The thought passed his mind many times, but he didn’t want to risk losing his only friend.

Until that day. Until the day he and Ethan were playing pirates and cowboys, when he knew the cowboys had really lost (for the hundredth time too). When Ethan still had Spencer pinned to the ground and he was rubbing it in his face that he had won. It was then did he realize he wanted to kiss Ethan. It was something he wanted, a curiosity that would kill him if he didn’t just do it. And it was a risk, a calculated one, but he knew he wanted to take it.

When Ethan had gotten low enough, Spencer lifted his head and quickly pecked his lips to Ethan’s. After the briefest moment, Spencer dropped his head back to the ground and stared up at his friend.

“Sorry,” he mumbled and looked away when he realized he might’ve messed up. “I was… I was just curious. That’s all.”

“You were just curious?” Ethan asked as he crawled off his friend and sat on the ground beside him. Spencer slowly sat up and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah. J-Just curious.”

Unfortunately, this kiss with Ethan was too soft. But Spencer was too young to know that. He’d learn one day that even though he had the smallest crush on Ethan, that they’d be better off as best friends than anything else.

{***}{***}{***}

When Spencer was 24, he had his second kiss. It was with Hollywood star Lila Archer. He was working a case, and protecting Lila from a possible stalker she had. The two were outside, Spencer was watching Lila swim in her pool. Spencer was very adamant about Lila getting out of the pool, so they could be in the safety of her home. But Lila wasn’t having any of it.

“Five minutes,” Lila begged as she swam up to the edge of the pool. Spencer was standing close, watching her with a worried crease in his brow. “Go get a suit in the house!” She nodded towards the open sliding doors of her home. Spencer looked over at her house and then quickly back at her with a scowl.

“What?! No! I don’t wanna grab a suit! Are you kidding me?!” Spencer shouted, his voice cracking out of annoyance. “Please let’s just go in.”

“Join me,” she pressed as she looked up at him. For a small moment, Spencer considered it. But it wasn’t long enough for him to actually go inside and change.

“No, I'm not gonna join you,” Spencer eventually said. Lila rolled her eyes before pouting.

“Why not?”

“You're being pursued by a psychotic killer who shoots people in the head!” Spencer shouted, again, his voice cracking, again. Lila pushed off the wall of the pool and floated on her back, away from Spencer.

“I'm not gonna stop living my life. I'm just not,” she stated firmly as she closed her eyes. Spencer stared at the woman in the pool, shock growing across his face. Any normal person would be scared, hiding for their lives when they hear that there’s a psychotic killer after them.

“This woman is insane,” Spencer thought the longer he stared at her. Although he was extremely cautious about his surroundings and who was around, he could feel a strange carelessness grow in his stomach.

“Lila, please, I'm begging of you. Will you please get out of the pool?” Spencer pleaded as he squatted down to the pool.

“Really, Spence, you should live a little.”

“Live a little? I've known you 48 hours, I feel like I've already aged 10 years.”

“I can't be that bad,” Lila mused as she swam back to the edge of the pool.

“Yes. no, you are that bad,” Spencer said as he stood back up.

“Fine, can you help me out at least?” Lila asked as she lifted a hand up to Spencer. Spencer stared at her hand for a moment before grabbing it. As he went to help her out, Lila pulled on Spencer’s hand, pulling him right into the pool.

Lila was instantly thrown into a fit of laughter as Spencer re-emerged from the water. He glared over at the girl as he pushed his hair away from his face.

“Yes, very funny. Laugh it up, Lila. Hilarious. My gun's wet. So great. My clothes,” Spencer’s tone was very clearly annoyed with what just happened.

‘I should have seen that coming,’ Spencer thought to himself as he looked at the woman. She smiled as she swam closer to him.

“You should have worn the suit,” Lila giggled as she grabbed Spencer’s tie and pulled him closer to her. Spencer swam closer to her, allowing her to pull him as close to her. She brought her hand to rest on the nape of his neck. And when he was close enough, she pressed her lips to his, quickly deepening it.

Spencer ended it just as fast as Lila started it.

“This is completely inappropriate,” Spencer said as he swam away, leaving Lila behind.

Spencer found a certain attractiveness in Lila, he wouldn’t lie about that. The moment wasn’t right. Would there ever be a right moment between Spencer Reid and Lila Archer? The pair had two wildly different career paths, and two wildly different lifestyles… There would never be a right moment for the two.

Even though Spencer enjoyed this kiss with Lila, it was too rough. It was very heated, and a moment of intense feelings. He began to wonder when he’d find the person who would give him the best kisses, and how long he’d have to wait for that moment.

{***}{***}{***}

When Spencer was 34, he found the person who gave the best kisses. There was more than one factor for why Spencer loved this person, their kisses were just a bonus. Like with Ethan, this person was Spencer’s safe space. He could be himself and not worry about anything. And like with Lila Archer, this person made Spencer feel free and near careless.

His first kiss with this person was… gentle, and sweet. Unlike with Ethan, this kiss wasn’t a quick peck to the lips. It wasn’t out of pure curiosity. Unlike with Lila, it wasn’t rushed and heated. It wasn’t because they wanted it. It was because they both wanted it.

It wasn’t their first date, not even their sixth date. In fact, they weren’t even on a date. Spencer had invited the BAU team over to his house to meet this person. The team had been excited to meet them since Spencer first spoke about his person. And after the team left, it was just Spencer and his person. Their first kiss just happened. They weren’t expecting it.

They were sitting on the couch, a movie playing- though neither of them were watching it. The couple was too busy talking about cleaning up the mess their dinner party had left behind, and when a good time to clean it would be.

“Do you want me to get ants? Because this is how I get ants,” Spencer said as he gestured towards the coffee table and the several plates and cups that occupied it. His person laughed before moving even closer to him. Even though they were already pretty close to cuddling, his person wanted to be even closer to him. “But what’s stopping us from taking care of the mess in the morning?” they asked as they looked up at Spencer. He sighed before looking back at his person. “I’m just saying, Spencer,” they whispered before shifting to his lap. Spencer’s eyes met theirs, and a small smile grew across his lips.

“Okay, okay, we can take care of it in the morning. If I get ants though I’m blaming you,” he laughed as he wrapped his arms around his person’s waist.

“I’ll take full responsibility!” they shouted, jumping and nearly falling backwards off his legs. Spencer laughed before pulling them closer to safety. Instead of falling off his legs, his person fell closer to him. “I’ll clean up first thing in the morning. Promise!” They wrapped their arms around Spencer’s neck.

“So now you’re spending the night?” Spencer raised an eyebrow as he looked back at them. They smiled before nodding lightly. The couple drifted closer together.

“If that’s okay. If not, I can go home after the movie is over,” they whispered before cocking their head to the side. Spencer looked at their eyes before glancing at their lips for a brief moment.

“It’d be the first time you spend the night here.”

“I don’t have an issue with that,” they shook their head and smiled. “Only if you don’t have an issue.” It was his person’s turn to look between his eyes and lips. They both wanted to kiss each other, but were both afraid. Spencer knew his person wanted to kiss him. And his person knew he wanted to kiss them.

“No issue here,” Spencer replied, although he wasn’t sure if it was a response to them spending the night, or giving them permission to kiss him. But he replied...

“Good,” they whispered before pressing their lips to Spencer’s. He hummed before bringing his hands to their cheeks. It only took a moment before he deepened the kiss.

Spencer had never kissed a person like he kissed his person. He could feel a fire grow in his chest. His arms wrapped around their waist and he pulled them onto his lap.

It felt like ages before they broke apart. In that moment, all they wanted to do was just be with each other and be in each other's space. But they knew they couldn’t. There were still things they had to do before they went to bed.

“We… We should clean up,” Spencer whispered, just so the silence would go away. His person laughed before tumbling off his lap. His hand caught their’s, stopping them from going any further. They turned around and looked down at him.

His person admired how his cheeks were flushed, his hair was tousled just right, and his lips were still pink from being kissed raw. He had a slight dazed look in his eyes.

“I like it when you look like you kissed someone. I like it even more when I know I’m that someone you kissed,” his person whispered. Spencer laughed and nodded.

“I like it even more when you’re the person I kissed, too,” he whispered as he pulled them back down to his lap. “What’re you doing?”

“Going to clean, like you said.”

“We can clean in the morning.”

There was no curiosity with this kiss, and he wasn’t hesitant. Spencer knew, 100%, that he wanted this kiss. And he was happy that this kiss was perfect. Better than the kiss with Ethan. Better than the kiss with Lila.

Spencer was happy he’d be spending the rest of his life with his person.

if you have any comments/questions about this part, let me know here! please consider reblogging or leaving a comment if you're a part of the taglist. it's so much work tagging everyone.

taglist: @thebluetint @mggsprettygirl @muffin-cup @misshale21 @spenciegoob @reidspoet @kuolonsyoja @broken-stardust @rainsong01 @beepboopboopbeep @babebenhardy @flipperpenguins @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto @ash19871962 @samaraaaaa

tags that didn’t work: @isabellasimps

#shadow writes stuff #masterlist #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fan fic #criminal minds fan fic

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dindjarindiaries · 4 years

Text

Winter

gif via @damerondjarin

summary: You spend the winter falling in love with Frankie.

series parts: summer, fall, winter

pairing: frankie “catfish” morales x f!reader

warnings: fluff, celebrations of thanksgiving (friendsgiving, i should say) and christmas

rating: T

word count: 6.154k

masterlist

The first snow is falling heavily the day you meet Frankie.

It’d be hard not to notice it, since you’re driving home on roads that definitely haven’t been salted yet—thus putting you on the highest level of caution. You’re already going the speed limit, and even then, you’ve still found yourself slipping a few times. You figure it’s time to finally get the snow tires back on, but what makes your car a problem isn’t your tires or even the snow. It’s the engine heating up so badly that you can almost see the smoke coming out of the hood, and with a curse, you pull the car over to the side of the road.

You stop the car and reach for the gloves you’d tossed so carelessly on the passenger seat just before you left work, pulling your coat a little tighter to your body as you step out of the car. You walk around to the hood and lift it, coughing a few times when some of the trapped smoke finally escapes. Thanks to years of having to deal with your own car troubles, there’s many things you can fix on your own, but this one’s got you beat. Snow sticks to your hair, body, and lashes, causing you to have to blink them away multiple times as you try to find out what’s happening. You’re at a loss, and you can’t help heaving out a sigh as you reach into your coat pocket for your phone.

No service. Great. The idea of using back roads to avoid the post-work traffic used to seem great—until you realize that you’re left out here with no signal at all, stranded and having to wait at the mercy of a stranger.

Who comes much sooner than expected.

You’ve just started to cross your arms and consider your options when the red pickup truck pulls over behind you. Your eyes narrow thanks to the brightness of their headlights, but they soon shut off, and immediately your eyes are drawn to the man who hops out of the truck. He’s got a forest green puffy winter jacket keeping him warm, paired with a baseball cap that one of his gloved hands tips on his head as he approaches you. As he comes closer, you meet his dark brown gaze, eyes that study you closely with genuine concern as he notices your predicament. You can feel the heat already rising in your cheeks as you look down at your feet in the snow. He’s much more prepared for it with jeans and a pair of boots versus you in your work slacks and the pair of heels you forgot to exchange for your own boots.

“Everything okay?” the man asks, his voice a slight rasp that’s much more gentle than you’d been expecting. He stops in front of you, hands coming to rest on his hips as he looks from your car back to you. “I know this is the worst kind of weather to break down in.”

You offer a small chuckle as you give your head a shake. “Well, actually, my engine’s overheated,” you explain, walking back to the open hood. The man follows you, his gaze investigating the area as you gesture towards it. “I can’t find out why, though. I didn’t want to keep driving in case, y’know…”

“Yeah, that’s a good call,” the man assures you, giving you a nod of approval before he leans over more to look around for you. After a few moments of silence, his brow lifts in interest, and he offers a brief ah before he stands up straight and looks over at you again. “It’s your radiator.”

You frown. “What’s wrong with it?”

“It’s cracked, and now it’s leaking.” You heave out a heavy sigh, clapping your gloved hands together as you grimace even further. “Don’t worry, it’s not a huge issue—for now. You’ve just gotta use a coolant on it to get the engine back to a normal temp, and then it’ll be fine.”

You look up at the man with a furrowed brow. “I don’t have any coolant.”

The man gestures with his gloved thumb towards his truck. “I have some, if you’re alright with me using it.”

You don’t hesitate to nod earnestly in response. “Yeah, of course! That’d be really great.” You give him a smile and he returns it. “Thank you so much…” you trail off, waiting for him to fill in with his name.

He seems to understand as he holds out a gloved hand to shake. “Frankie,” he tells you, his smile only growing as you accept his hand. “Frankie Morales.”

You respond with your name, watching as he hurries back to his truck and opens the door to search for the coolant. Frankie’s quick with it as he jogs back over, and you step away to let him work as he loosens the cap and then pours the coolant gingerly into the reservoir. As he works, you talk about how you both ended up on these back roads. You explain your reasoning of avoiding the traffic on the main roads after work, while he says he’s seen one too many disasters for his liking and he often sees people get stuck on these roads—so now, he drives them so he can help whoever’s in need. Frankie’s evident kindness warms your heart immediately, and you can’t help smiling throughout his entire explanation, though you discover not everyone’s as good about noticing it as you are.

“I’ve had a lot of people not want my help,” Frankie’s saying as he starts to tighten the cap back on. “I mean, I don’t blame them. It’s kinda weird for a stranger to just pull over and offer their help, especially if it’s a woman by herself—because I’m sure you know how a lot of men sadly just aren’t trustworthy these days. I don’t wanna freak them out, you know?” Frankie looks over at you, and for a split second, a small look of horror crosses over his features. “I’m not freaking you out, am I?”

You can’t help but laugh because you haven’t gotten an inkling of anything other than pure friendliness from Frankie. “No, Frankie, not at all,” you assure him, even daring to leave a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You’re nothing but very kind to me. I’m surprised that others can’t see that.”

You think your words might’ve made Frankie blush just judging by the way he ducks his face away from view for a moment, distracting himself as he pulls down the hood of your car for you. “Well, thanks,” Frankie says in a voice even softer than before. “I just, y’know, I wanna see people get home safe.” He tucks his gloved hands into his coat pockets as he speaks.

Your smile continues to grow as you shake your head. “We need more people like you in this world. I can’t thank you enough.”

Frankie returns your smile. “Please, it’s the least I could do.” He then hesitates, and you watch one of his hands free themselves to tip his hat again before he speaks. “You can feel free to shut me down completely on this, but do you mind if I, uh, if I follow you home? Just to make sure you make it safe? I know that sounds insanely creepy, but I just want to make sure the coolant’s working, and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I found out—.”

You cut him off with a laugh and another reassuring hand on his shoulder. “That’s fine, Frankie. I think that if you really were a creepy stranger, you would’ve made your move when my car wasn’t working.”

Frankie laughs with you, giving you a nod as you both start to make a move for your cars. He first helps you into yours, obviously having noticed the situation with your now snow-filled heels as he opens your door and offers a hand for you to take as you balance and kick the snow out of them. Once you’re all settled, you watch in the rearview mirror as he heads back to his truck, and you wait until his headlights are on to pull back onto the road—pleased to notice that the engine’s temperature has returned to normal.

The drive home to your townhouse isn’t too long from where you’d been stranded, and in just under ten minutes, you’re pulling into your half of the shared driveway. You make it into the garage, hoping that Frankie hasn’t driven away yet. Thankfully, when you step out of your car, you notice he’s still there, having pulled up along the street. You bite back a smile as you hurry down to where he’s parked, watching as he opens his window to talk to you.

“Does everything look alright?” Frankie questions, and you can see a concerned furrow in his brow.

“It looks great,” you assure him, glad to see the knit in his brow straighten out as he gives you a nod of approval. Before he has a chance to speak again, you keep going, knowing that you’ll sound ludicrous but feeling unable to stop yourself. “I can’t thank you enough, and I’d really like to be able to do something. Do you want to come in quick, just for a mug of hot chocolate or something? I mean, it’s okay if you don’t, you probably have places to go.”

Frankie smiles at you. “I think that sounds really nice,” he agrees. “Should I park here, or—?”

“You can pull in the driveway, if you want,” you tell him, and he nods before you give him the room to move. There’s a warmth in your chest that sticks there and you can’t exactly place it. All you can do is focus on retrieving your work bag from your car as Frankie parks his truck and hops out again, following you to the door and making sure he kicks all the snow off his boots before he enters behind you. “I’m sorry, I know it’s not much,” you begin to apologize as you watch him look around the house, taking his coat for him once he shrugs it off. “It’s not very ready for guests, either.”

“It’s great,” Frankie assures you with a kind smile. “It’s very… I know this isn’t technically a word, but it’s very homey.”

“Actually, I think that is a word,” you confirm with a giggle, inviting him to sit at your kitchen island as you get out a saucepan and pour some milk into it. You turn to face Frankie with an eyebrow raised. “Wait, you aren’t lactose intolerant or anything, right?”

Frankie chuckles and shakes his head. “No, I’m fine.”

You breathe a sigh of relief and continue with what you’re doing, getting the hot chocolate mix out from a cabinet beside the stove. “I just have the mix, I hope that’s okay. I know it’s pretty sugary, but I don’t usually have a lot of time to make it from scratch.”

“Hey, don’t worry, really.” Frankie’s tone is gentle yet stern, as if he’s trying to get the point across to you very thoroughly. “I appreciate the fuss, but I promise, it’s not necessary. I’m not picky at all.”

You smile to yourself as you set out two mugs, finally turning back towards Frankie and standing across from him at the counter. In the lighting that hangs from your ceiling just above the counter, you can more vividly see his face, the kind twinkle in his dark eyes and the scruff that graces his jaw and upper lip. You hope your admiration isn’t so obvious as you shrug at him. “I know, I just… you were so helpful to me, and I just want to return the favor.”

Frankie raises an eyebrow. “Are you sure that’s it?” His tone contains a hint of teasing in it. He’d obviously caught you in the act of observing him.

You scoff playfully, looking down at your hands that rest on the countertop. Your fingers are folded together as your thumbs fiddle with each other. “Well, I guess I also thought you were cute, too.”

You look back up and bite back a smile upon seeing Frankie’s cheeks reddening a bit. He tips his hat—which you figure, by now, is a nervous habit of his—and see a small smile of his own tugging at the corner of his lips. “Then it’s not weird for me to say that I thought the same thing about you, right?”

You laugh and shake your head, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks as your gaze never breaks away from his. “I guess it’s not. Every great romcom starts with something breaking down, right?”

Frankie laughs with you, his eyes crinkling up a bit in a way that has your stomach erupting with butterflies. “Or canceled flights,” he adds, “and that’s really down my alley.”

You feel curiosity fill you at his words, and you encourage him to elaborate on that. Frankie begins to tell you about his piloting experience, including the job he has at the local airport teaching flight lessons. He explains that’s why he said before that he’s seen a lot of disasters, because flying can get really tricky sometimes, so he’s always looking out for people’s backs. He includes this with his time spent in the Delta Force, especially with his group of friends who he’s always had to watch out for thanks to their enthusiastic yet reckless behavior. He keeps going even as you finish heating up the milk, preparing the mugs and handing one over to him.

Frankie encourages you to talk more about yourself as well, and you go on about your desk job you have right now and your day-to-day life that pales in comparison to his. Still, Frankie’s interested in every detail, his brown eyes completely alluring as they look into your gaze with such genuine interest. You tell him that you’ve moved far away from family and he tells you the same thing—a commonality that warms your chest more than it probably should. You go on and on in such an easygoing conversation until you realize Frankie’s been here for two and a half hours now and both your mugs have been empty for half that time.

“I should probably go, now,” Frankie admits, which is what causes you to whip around and read the time on the digital clock of your microwave. You gasp lightly and start to apologize for keeping him so late, but Frankie holds up a hand to stop you as he gets out of his chair. “If I wanted to go earlier, I would’ve. I actually would stay longer, but I’ve got a flight lesson early tomorrow.” You smile at each other, and Frankie starts to reach into his pocket. “I’d love to keep this going, though. Do you mind if I…?” Frankie trails off as he hands you his phone, which is open to a new contact.

You agree without hesitation, entering your name and number and letting him do the same in your phone. He leaves with a warm smile, one that only grows when you ask him to text you when he’s gotten back safely. Frankie does exactly that—along with a request to take you out later in the week.

That’s how you end up hopping out of Frankie’s truck at the local outdoor rink, receiving a helping hand from Frankie after he’s already opened the door for you. You’d warned him that your ice skating skills are even worse than the average person and he’d told you not to worry—that you could drag him down with you if you needed to. He looks over at you as you walk in, his gaze observing your winter apparel for the cold night as he smiles softly.

“You look warm enough,” Frankie says softly, “but I have some extra stuff in the truck in case you need it.”

You smile up at him. “Thanks, Frankie. I don’t think your thoughtfulness ever ends.”

Frankie simply shakes his head, but you don’t miss the small blush of pink across his cheeks as he leads you inside to the counter. He—of course, and much to your own protests—pays for not only the time spent skating but also your rentals. He’s got his on in record time but you take a bit longer, which he doesn’t seem to mind at all. As soon as you stand up, you already start to wobble a bit, instinctively reaching for Frankie’s arm to stabilize yourself. You look shyly up at him afterwards, feeling embarrassed.

“Sorry,” you nearly squeak out, starting to loosen your hold on his arm.

“Don’t apologize,” Frankie insists, placing his gloved hands over both of yours to encourage you to keep them there. “I told you, I’m your anchor—and I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

You nod, trying to hold back a smile as he helps to lead you onto the ice. He holds you by both your hands to get you safely inside, and once you’re gliding, you’ve resumed your position of holding onto one of his arms with both your hands. Frankie’s easily the one guiding both of you as you go along, looking over at you every once in a while to make sure you’re hanging in there. You find it easier than you thought it’d be, and you smile up at him in delight. “I think I’m getting the hang of it.”

Frankie raises an eyebrow with a gentle smile. “Yeah?” He watches your feet glide beside his. “I think so, too.” He gently begins to tug upwards on his arm, encouraging your hands to meet as he entwines your gloved fingers together. “Just in case.”

You beam up at him. “Just in case,” you echo his words, letting the sarcasm drip into your voice as Frankie nudges your shoulder with a chuckle. The movement causes you to trip just a step, but instinctively you wrap your free hand around his arm again, throwing Frankie into a fit of laughter as you give his arm a tighter squeeze in playful anger. “So much for keeping me safe!”

Frankie shakes his head and gives your hand a squeeze. “I would’ve caught you,” he assures you softly. His words have already made your stomach flutter, but then he leans down to press a gentle kiss to your cheek, which truly makes your heart practically fly out of your chest. You bite back a warm smile as you hold a gaze with him, pulling yourself closer to his side as you continue gliding together.

You keep going around in circles as you talk about the upcoming holiday of Thanksgiving, detailing each other’s plans and what you usually do with the inability to travel out to your families—and the lack of desire to, thanks to flight costs, risky weather, work hours, and family drama. The rest of your conversation flows just as easily as it had the night you met and during all your other text or phone conversations ever since. You also can’t help noticing the eyes you draw as you keep skating together. It’s mostly the teenage girls whose stares linger the most, whispering to each other with hands over their hearts as if they’re deeming you both as the model relationship. It makes you feel flustered at least a hundred times, yet you can’t help feeling the same thing they are each and every time you look over at Frankie and meet his caring gaze.

They’ve kept the retractable ceiling above the rink open for the evening, and so once snow starts to fall gently from the sky, you get to watch it come down around you. Not feeling affected by the cold thanks to the warmth of your clothes and Frankie’s close presence, you don’t mind it at all, and he doesn’t seem to either. At one point, though, he does slow your skating to a stop, letting you both step to the side out of other people’s ways as you try to blink away a large snowflake that’s settled on your lashes. Frankie laughs softly as he gently reaches a gloved hand forward.

“I got it,” Frankie assures you, and his gloved thumb moves carefully to brush the snowflake away. But now, you’re both realizing how close you are to each other, the heat of each other’s breath warming your faces. Frankie’s hand settles onto your cheek and the other slips out of your grip to meet your other cheek. You watch his gaze drop down to your lips and then back up to your eyes, seeming to ask you if it’s okay to keep going. You reassure him with a warm smile and the same gesture, your gloved hands pressing against his chest for stability as you let him press his lips against yours.

The kiss is so soft and slow that it feels like you’re melting together in the same way the snowflakes start to melt on your warm cheeks, somehow so full of passion while simultaneously remaining gentle. For this moment, the rink and the people filling it disappear completely, and all you can conceive of is the man you’re drawing yourself even closer to. Frankie pulls away after what feels like so long yet somehow also doesn’t feel long enough, and the second his gaze meets yours again, you both smile wider than you think you ever have.

You swear you can feel gazes practically burning through you, so you look to the side and see the same group of teenage girls from before. They’re practically swooning at the sight of you, and you can’t help giggling with flustered cheeks as you look back up at Frankie. He raises his brow at you with another small smile.

“I think we’re drawing some attention,” you whisper to him, despite the fact that the girls are standing rather far off. Frankie follows your gaze as you look back to them, and they finally seem to notice as they duck away with gloved hands containing their laughter.

Frankie looks back to you with a soft chuckle, his hands moving from your cheeks to your hands as he takes both of them in his. “I guess we should go somewhere more private, then,” Frankie suggests, giving your hands a squeeze before he helps to guide you both off the ice. He keeps one of your hands in his as you walk back to the truck, him once again opening the door for you before he gets in on his side. Once you’re setting off to your home once again, you take his hand in yours, exchanging a smile with him. “I hope you had fun.”

“Of course I did,” you assure him, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “I mean, once I learned how to actually skate.”

Frankie chuckles. “You did great.”

You continue to make small talk until he pulls into your driveway, yet again being as chivalrous as possible as he opens the truck door for you and walks you up to your front step. Frankie stops once you’re there, taking both your hands in his again as he looks at you with nothing but pure admiration and warmth. You can’t stop yourself from leaning close to him and giving him a soft kiss, butterflies erupting at the natural way his mouth moves against yours. You pull away with eyes that you’re sure have just as much admiration as his.

“I hope this means we can have another date,” Frankie says, chuckling when you laugh at him.

“And many, many more,” you insist, giving his hands a squeeze. Frankie’s eyes brighten at your words. “All I can say is that I’m really glad my car broke down.”

Frankie laughs at that. “Yeah, but we’re gonna get that fixed for good, alright?” You nod at him, beaming when he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Have a good night.”

“You too,” you remark, and he gives your hands one last squeeze before he steps away. As he walks back to his truck, you call after him. “Text me when you get home!”

Frankie turns around and tips his hat on his head. “I was already planning on it!”

You bite back a smile and nod, turning around with a warm heart to let yourself into your home. You and Frankie spend the next few weeks seeing each other as much as possible, whether it be going to dinners out or just staying in at one of your homes—including one night spent at Frankie’s place watching the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special. That night, you end up accidentally falling asleep in his arms on the couch, and you wake up in the morning just to laugh along with Frankie. Thankfully, it’d been a Friday night, and neither one of you had work that morning.

On Thanksgiving—or, rather, Friendsgiving as you both called it—you’re with your group of friends but constantly hold a text conversation with Frankie. He tells you about the antics going on with his friends as you tell him about the way your friends are absolutely pelting you with questions about Frankie. You ask about dessert and he tells you that his friends definitely don’t know how to put desserts together, so with the permission of the friend who’s hosting, you invite Frankie over. He comes and draws the immediate attention of your friends, who openly admire him and his friendliness in a way that has your heart swelling with affection and happiness.

One of your favorite moments comes when you get to meet Frankie’s friends. You’ve been together for well over a month, now—though it practically feels like forever. Christmas is coming around the corner and Frankie tells you that his buddies are doing a little get-together and they’re very eager to meet you. You, of course, accept the invitation, and you soon find yourself with your hand tight in Frankie’s as you walk up to his friend Will’s house. Before you enter, Frankie stops you, giving you a soft yet serious look.

“I know I’ve told you this before, but they’re… a little much,” Frankie says with a laugh. “If it becomes too much, just let me know, okay? I’ll have them get off your back.”

“I can handle it,” you assure him, giving his cheek a kiss before you gesture towards the door. Frankie nods with a smile and moves to open it, knowing it won’t be locked as he does so. You’re both met with loud cheers and a blur of hugs and warm handshakes. You can already tell how the group acts like a little family, a thought that makes you smile as you continue holding Frankie’s hand and follow him into the living room.

Will hands you and Frankie a drink, and you cuddle a little closer into Frankie as he keeps his arm wrapped around your shoulders. You see the guys giving each other looks upon seeing it, and you look up to Frankie with a giggle to see him simply shaking his head at you. They ask if it’s okay for them to practically just interview you, and you laugh as you agree and start answering their questions with honesty and grace.

“First kiss?” Benny asks, going on the countless round of questioning as his eyes glitter with mischief yet friendliness.

“While ice skating on the first date,” you answer, earning a dramatic aw from your “crowd” that has Frankie rolling his eyes.

“Fish’s best feature?” Will questions with eyes narrowed in focus.

“His eyes,” you say.

“Really?” Frankie asks, and you look up at him with a nod.

“Obviously,” you retort, watching his cheeks flush red and tapping his nose just to make it a little worse. He pushes your hand away playfully as you laugh and face the boys again.

“Fish’s worst feature?” Tom dares to ask.

“His lack of self-care,” you insist. When Frankie gives you an incredulous look, you shake your head up at him. “You need to care for yourself as much as you do for others, babe.”

Frankie simply shrugs in response, hiding yet another blush by sipping his beer. You snort and turn to face the group.

“Alright, alright, I think we’ve overwhelmed her enough,” Santiago insists, drawing a laugh from you as he moves to stand up. “I think it’s time for some of these gifts.”

Frankie tells you that they do a Secret Santa every year amidst the panic of you definitely having not brought anything, but you’re both surprised when Santiago hands a little wrapped box to you. They make you open it last, wanting to soak in your reaction as you do so. When you unwrap it and open the box, you can’t help the wide smile from taking over your features as you pick up a dog tag necklace.

“It’s engraved with Fish’s details from back in the day,” Santiago explains.

“You guys didn’t have to do this,” you say, but there’s so much warmth in your tone as you admire the sweet gift. You hand it to Frankie, who looks at it with just as much awe and admiration.

“Of course we did,” Will insists with a smile. “But don’t thank us just yet.”

You furrow your brow. “What do you mean?”

Suddenly, there’s a quiet jingling sound from above your head, and you and Frankie look up simultaneously to see Benny standing over you with a mistletoe hanging from his hand. The group laughs as your realization sets in, and you both shake your heads before you lean in for a quick kiss that sends them into utter chaos. Benny walks back to where he’d previously been sitting and deals out high fives with the guys while you and Frankie just sit there and laugh at their dramatic reactions. By the end of the night, you truly feel like a part of their little family.

But your favorite moment of the winter comes on Christmas Day, when you’re having a little celebration with just Frankie at your place. You decided to spend it together, much rather having the comfort of each other rather than the panic of trying to get last-minute flights and time off to visit your families. You’re sitting on the couch in front of the small fireplace, watching as he unwraps some of the gifts you’ve given him—including the new, leather watch he instantly straps on his wrist. You can tell, though, that Frankie’s much more excited for you to open yours, and you go through a few nice things before reaching the last box. Frankie’s eyes are set completely on you as you open it, your lips parting in beautiful awe as you observe the silver necklace laying within. It’s a small snowflake with a diamond in its center, and when you look back up at Frankie, you can see the same glow of the diamond within his gaze.

“I know you have the necklace from the guys,” Frankie says, “but I saw that you put that on your car mirror instead, and I just—I really wanted to give you some sort of, you know, promise necklace, I guess. And I picked a snowflake because we met during the first snowfall of the season, and then our first kiss was because of the snowflake on your eye.” Frankie stops his rambling to search your gaze with a bit of concern. “I hope you like it.”

“I love it, Frankie,” you assure him in a hushed voice, thanks to your sudden emotion from the sweet gift. When you get lost in his gaze, you feel a bolder part of you emerge as you swallow hard. “Actually I… I think I love you.”

Frankie’s dark gaze glitters as brilliantly as you’ve ever seen it, and you watch his lips part in disbelief for a moment before he smiles wide at you. “I think I love you, too, baby.” With that, his hands reach for the sides of your face and pull it to his in a kiss more passionate than you’ve ever received from him. The heat radiating from both your beating hearts rivals that of the fire you sit in front of as your mouths move in perfect and graceful sync, your shared confessions being translated in this physical expression before you pull away with heavy breaths and wide smiles.

Once you’ve caught your breath, you pick up the box again, handing it to Frankie. “Can you put it on for me?” you ask, and Frankie nods earnestly as he takes the necklace out of the box and clips it in place around your neck. His touch lingers there for a moment, his fingertips brushing over the skin as his lips soon follow. Frankie leaves a few gentle kisses there that make your skin erupt into pleasant goosebumps, and instinctively you lean forward to give him more access. His arms settle on your middle as he pulls you closer to himself.

“You’ve given me a lot of great things today,” Frankie mumbles, his breath fanning over your neck as he does so, “but I think the greatest gift was the words you just spoke to me.”

You smile as you spin your head around as best as you can, reaching a hand back over your shoulder to hold his cheek. “I might be able to think of something a little better,” you hint in his same hushed tone, fingers dancing along the skin of his cheek as you try your best to bite back the growing smile.

Frankie’s gaze glitters with desire yet concern as he brushes some of the hair away from your face. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

You spin around to fully face him, straddling his lap as you rest your forehead against his. “I promise,” you begin, taking his hat and tossing it to the side so you can thread your fingers through his hair, “as long as you’re okay with it, I’m very much ready to prove what I said before.” You press a gentle kiss to the corner of his lips. “That I love you, very much.”

Frankie finally gives in with a smile that melts against your lips, his hands gliding over your sides and making you warmer than any fire ever could. By the end of the night, you’re wrapped up in Frankie and the warm blankets atop the couch, donning nothing but the necklace he’d gifted you with a heart that’s fuller than glasses of eggnog left untouched on the coffee table.

Before you know it, New Year’s Eve rolls around, and you and Frankie are spending it at a lively bar with the boys—though all your attention’s solely focused on each other. The countdown begins when you each get a glass of champagne in your hands, but not without Frankie murmuring something about oh, so fancy! that makes you laugh into the button-up covering his chest. You join in with the crowd as you look up to the TV that shows the glowing ball in Times Square, counting down each second until the clock strikes midnight. There’s a joyous cheer that’s drowned out the moment you and Frankie share a kiss, pulling away to press your nose against his with a smile.

“Happy New Year, my love,” you say in a breath barely breathed, your smile growing as you watch his dark eyes sparkle in that favorite manner of yours.

“Happy New Year, baby,” Frankie responds before he captures your lips with his again, seeming to completely forget your surroundings—but so do you.

By the time the snow starts melting away that winter and the buds of flowers start to peek out, you and Frankie are moving into a townhouse of your own. You’re about to reach for another box when you watch birds soaring above, returning back from their winter homes. You look to Frankie who’s just joined you at your side, watching as he tries to find the source of the look of wonder in your eyes. “I can’t believe the winter’s over already,” you confess. “I don’t even remember it being cold for that long.”

Frankie chuckles softly, wrapping you into a warm embrace and placing a kiss on top of your head. “That’s because spending the winter together made it feel much warmer,” he insists, pulling away from the hug to instead watch you roll your eyes at his cheesiness and join him in a sweet kiss.

And as cheesy as the words might’ve been, you know there’s truth to them—and you know that winter’s bound to be your favorite season, now, thanks to Frankie.

series parts: summer, fall, winter

permanent tag list: @mikahidalgo @bestintheparsec @stilllivindue2spite @givemethatgold @xbrujita @mandalorianspace @blushingwueen @sevvysaurus @myakai13 @thisis-theway @beskars @rachelloveseveryone @theindiealto @hiscyarika @wickedfrsgrl @synystersilenceinblacknwhite @bookwafflefangirl @charliepeaceout @cable-kenobi @ezraslittleblondestreak @hdlynn @your-pixels-are-showing @b0n-chann @javier-djarin @nettyklecan @mistermiraclee @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @smellssharpies @catfishingmorales @badassbaker @wille-zarr @kaetastic @saltywintersoldat @agentpike @mrsparknuts @readsalot73 @yespolkadotkitty @mandhoelorian @lilangeldevil006 @cyaredindjarin @roxypeanut @phoenixhalliwell @hail-doodles @randomness501 @this-cat-is-dea @hopplessdreamer

seasons with frankie tag list: @abuttoncalledsmalls @agirllovespasta @kindablackenedsuperhero @iellaren-uodo-rian @havenforafrazzledmind

frankie morales tag list: @themandadlorian @chibi-liz05

#frankie if you're not careful i'll marry you #right now #and ESPECIALLY when it's winter #frankie morales #catfish morales #frankie morales x reader #triple frontier #dindjarindiaries

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wildcrisis · 4 years

Text

The Detriment of a Pro-Hero Society

Also known as: Kids are kind of being brainwashed into being heroes, let’s look into that.

Dedicated to @deafmic for getting me back into this bullshit and inspiring me to finish something I had started noting out about two years ago. By now, I’m sure much of this has been said over time by various people, and it makes me happy to know that there are others out there who like to look deep into the background culture and settings of their favorite manga!

I apologize in advance if you notice an idea of yours here; I haven’t been active in the fandom in two-ish-years, so I may be restating some things you guys already have. I consider this rambling analysis to be free to use and abuse by anyone, no credit necessary! I only get a little bit of time on the weekends to really be on my PC, so if you send me an ask or reply to this, it may take me some time to reply back!

Anywho, onto this mess I’ve made. It’s not very tidy and is more a collection of thoughts than a properly detailed analysis, but I ain’t got all day. Again, this is messy but I don’t really have the energy to make it nice and neat.

Looking for something in specific? You might wanna ctrl+f around these titles, because this is very long and rambling.

Part I: The Beginning of Quirks and their Effect on Society Part II: What Makes a Villain Part III: M O N E Y and F A M E Part IV: Brainwashed Part V: Ignoring Those Who Need Help Part VI: Cycle/Conclusion

Part I: The Beginning of Quirks and their Effect on Society

So, we know through the manga that, as quirks first began to evolve and more and more people obtained them, the world was thrown into chaos. People had obtained power, and power is as power does, and it corrupts.

As people began using their quirks for evil deeds that broke the law, law enforcement around the world was essentially powerless. After all, during the birth of the quirk age, quirks were the minority. The powerful minority. Against that, men with tasers, batons, and guns hardly stood a chance.

However, just as the rise of quirks gave birth to people who would use that power for misdeeds, so did it bring life to those who had the inherent desire to protect others. The beginning of the age of vigilantes, which would lead to the age of Pro Heroes.

Obviously, All for One was very relevant during this time, but we’re not here to talk about him. For once. We’re here to talk about society as a whole.

The world order was too chaotic. We are aware of this due to the monologues of certain characters, and I assume we’ll be learning more as more of the former carriers of One for All become present in Deku. In this beginning, it wasn’t so much “heroes” versus “villains”, more than it was law abiding citizens versus law breakers. It’s likely that precedent hadn’t yet been established for “no quirk use”, as there were hardly enough people who could actually enforce such a law.

As more of society began to develop quirks, the Police Force made a decision to not use their quirks to take down law breakers. They moved to a more leadership position, and took a backseat to those who did use their quirks for good. At first, it was a hard decision to allow such things as Pro Heroes to take on law breakers who were too dangerous for someone to take down without a quirk.

But why, after all this time, have the Police and the Pro Heroes remained separate entities? Why have they never combined, and why do they remain so polarized in how they approach situations?

The answer is simple, yet multi-layered. Heroes and Villains ... they’re popular. They attract attention.

Part II: What Makes a Villain

If you assign a person the label “Villain”, you de-humanize them. They are no longer a “person”, per se, but a monster. Evil, in the eyes of most people. It’s easier, then, to accept their fate of being beaten by a Hero, and being carted off to prison.

This is an important distinction to make. If you remove the labels of Hero and Villain. If you remove their Quirks. Do people still react the same way? Do they cheer and adore the hero, as the hero beats the opponent senseless? Of course not. In a battle of man vs man, in the moment, humans don’t react in such a way.

We can understand why an adult who lived a hard life may turn to a life of crime. But, hardly to we look as to why or how they got there.

In this world where quirks have become the norm, but are constantly evolving, we must wonder; how are quirks judged? How are they defined? How are people treated, for the quirk they possess?

We have many examples of outcasts, and they possess a wide variety of quirks from “extremely destructive” to simply “strange, odd, not okay in society”.

Shigaraki and Overhaul are both examples of terrifying, destructive quirks. Is it any wonder that their lives turned out the way they did? The power of death was etched into their very DNA. We know Shigaraki’s backstory and how he became who he is today. It’s implied that Chisaki was abandoned or ran away as well.

Then, you have the more odd quirks that, on the surface don’t seem nefarious, but when explained in context, would make people feel uncomfortable. Toga, who’s quirk is to drink blood and transform into another person. Twice, who can make copies of any person and used his quirk for an evil deed. Nemoto, who can force anyone to tell the truth, and lived a life where he realized everyone was lying to him.

Even Shinsou Hitoshi, desperate to become a hero, was put down for what his quirk DOES. Brainwashing. That’s a “villain’s quirk”. Fellow children said that to him so casually, and behaved as if they were terrified of him!

Eri, with her quirk that made her father disappear from existence itself ... Had she not been rescued from Overhaul, what would have become of her? Forced to believe her entire existence was a curse, told that she does nothing but harm people -- as she grew older and gained control of her power, would anyone honestly think she would have led a life of goodness, considering how she was raised?

How many people labeled Villains are currently in prison, because they were treated like outcasts from the moment they developed a terrifying quirk? Was there anyone there to help them figure their way through this world, considering what they’d been born with? Are there services for people who have trouble controlling their quirks, which are truly destructive? Even with laws in place saying that you can’t use your quirk publicly, just LIVING with that knowledge that you were born ... with a scary quirk ... a villain’s quirk ... How people treat you because of that, how you look, what your quirk can do -- do you ever have any friends? Any real friends, that aren’t just people who are scared of you?

Is it any wonder, that people like this turn out to be “villains”? Society is GROOMING THEM to BE VILLAINS, simply for who and what they are and are born with.

Part III: M O N E Y and F A M E

Throwing oneself into harms way sure is a dangerous move, that most people would never bother doing. How, then, do you entice more people to become heroes and take on the villains that are popping up all around for obvious reasons?

You make your Heroes popular. You make sure they look stylish. They have cool attitudes. You make them popular among the children. After all, getting fellow adults in on the Pro-Hero train is good and all, but much like a pro-athlete, one can likely only do Hero work for a certain span of time before their body is unable to take the strain. Maybe say, ages 18-40?

Besides, with more and more people being born every day with quirks, the number of people who turn to villainous activity will grow, right? Especially if you’re not actively helping people manage their quirks, because hey, they’re not allowed to use them publicly so what does it matter?

Kids. Kids will watch heroes on TV, and see it just like any other super-hero show or cartoon. They’ll buy the merchandise. People will begin to hemorrhage money over these heroes, because they’re flashy. They’re kind. They save lives.

Now, not to say that Heroes are just there for the paycheck -- not at all. Many people become heroes simply because they do love to help people. Some become heroes because they want to stop bad guys. Sure, there are some who do it to maybe someday live an easier life, or because it pays really well and they have family to support. But, I do believe that most people go into the Pro Hero business with good intentions.

THIS, is part of the reason that Pro Heroes have remained separate from law enforcement. They are now a business. A very wealthy business. It’s not just hero agencies that make money off of the Pro Hero business. It’s toy manufacturers. Comic book stores. Prisons. Hospitals. Roots of Pro Hero society reach into nearly every type of business that there is, whether directly or indirectly.

Nobody wants that money to disappear by folding Heroes back into the police force. No, they want MORE heroes. More heroes, and more people for the heroes to fight.

tldr: heroes = $$$, so keep ‘em coming

Part IV: Brainwashed

There are a lot of factors that go into making society as a whole okay with something. It takes a lot of time, for one. It takes powerful, well spoken people. It takes lots of media attention. Before you know it, everyone is eating up the same exact thing quite willingly ... and it spreads to the next generation. And the next. After that happens, its something that is well integrated into society, like a freckle that’s always been on your arm -- its just “always been that way”.

I’ve mentioned several times that its odd for people to be so okay with one person beating another person senseless. Again, we know that its considered acceptable, because of the labels we’ve put on these individuals based on their actions: Heroes and Villains.

What I wonder is: How long have people been okay with this? Do they not realize that, in a way, this is history repeating itself?

We know why people don’t dig deeper into this. Pro Heroes are popular and people love them. The media has hand fed the Hero lifestyle to children for some time now. There are schools, MORE THAN ONE SCHOOL, that teach your child how to become a pro hero.

Think about that. It’s not just some extra-curricular activity, like sports. These are schools, designed to take in freshly graduated MIDDLE-SCHOOLERS who have not finished their regularly schooling education, who still have growing bodies and minds, and ... crafts them into perfect pro-heroes. AND PARENTS ARE OKAY WITH THIS -- SOMETIMES EVEN MORE THAN OKAY WITH IT.

These schools send young teenagers onto the streets under a pro-heroes wing to witness and be a part of fighting crime. Not organized crime, like a ring of bad guys or something, but ... random crime. Disasters. From a young age, they may encounter situations with actual dead people. Their training is dangerous. Their powers can be dangerous. One wrong move, and a student, someone you worked alongside, had lunch with everyday, is just ... gone.

There exists a police force in society. There are already pro-heroes. Why, then, is society okay with multiple schools that are practically breeding child soldiers? They are teaching kids everything about how to kick ass, how to take down these terrifying people, how to fight, how to save lives ...

Why is no one looking into why villains exist in the first place? Are these kids ever taught de-escalation tactics? To talk their opponents down? Not everyone out there is using their quirk to be evil for the sake of being evil. There’s always a reason, a purpose.

Part V: Ignoring Those Who Need Help

Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.

Hey, Star Wars had some good points!

I’ve discussed before what makes a villain. People who are afraid of what they’re capable of. People who society has turned their back on. People who desperately need help, but there is no one out there willing to give it.

These people will always find each other in the shadows. They begin, at a young age, being terrified of what they are. What they’ve done. What they can do. Maybe they’ve been kicked out of their families. Maybe they’ve killed before, completely on accident.

The average person turns their back on people like this.

These people begin their lives terrified. Constantly being told that their quirks, their past, their family, what ever it is, will make them end up a bad person. Or, maybe they tell them they’re already a bad person. That fears breeds anger and hate. Hate for this society that would rather see them burn, than offer them any help.

A young boy grows up into a man. He had a potentially devastating quirk that he never really got a good hold on, because he was never allowed to practice with it. Everyone is too scared to let him try. Then, one day, something happens -- completely by accident. He causes a scene. A massacre. He hurts people.

Parents are excited to see which of their quirks their baby displays. Instead of being one or the other, or even a fusion of both, the unthinkable occurs. Its a mutation. The toddler hurts a sibling, a parent, a friend. Terrified, the parents abandon the child, for fear of losing their entire family.

A child is told, over and over, that his quirk will never be good for anything other than being evil. This knowledge rests heavy on his shoulders, its repeated to him yearly as he grows. Then, when he acts on what everyone has TOLD HIM FOR YEARS HE WILL DO, they are surprised. As if they hadn’t imprinted the very notion into his mind.

In a way, Overhaul was right about one thing. Hero society is a disease. People look forward to watching Heroes take down Villains and save the day. They don’t think at all about why these people are villains, how they got there, where they came from. They will never admit to potentially being the reason villains exist in the first place.

Part VI: Cycle/Conclusion

Wow, I have rambled a lot. I don’t think I hit every point that I’ve ever thought of for sure. There’s ... a lot of them. And a lot of comparisons I wanted to make to other superhero anime, specifically Tiger and Bunny, which I believe does an excellent job of showing the ups and downs of hero societies.

What I wanted to make clear in all this rambling mess (which, if you read all of it, I am SO SO SORRY), is that the very existence of Pro Heroes and Villains exist solely because of a few factors that exist in a cycle.

Pro Heroes = $$$ -> Schools for more heroes -> ignoring quirk-related-problems -> more villains -> pro heroes beat up villains -> pro heroes =$$$ etc

There is someone, or some organization, that sits above all of this. There has to be. There has to be some more logical explanation as to why this type of Hero v Villain culture has been allowed to exist all of this time, and things have not drifted more back in the direction of police vs lawbreakers. There has to be a reason that its okay for heroes to be so popular. There has to be a reason that children are allowed to be groomed into becoming heroes. There has to be a reason that there isn’t more help out there for people with these types of potentially destructive quirks.

There has to be reasons.

There has to be reasons for how the Hero Commission moves. There has to be reasons for how the police move. There has to be a reason that society is still allowed to go on like this, and that its become culturally acceptable.

If anyone out there can put all my rambling into clearer words and actively wants to, I would love that. Thank you for taking the time to read my mess!

xoxo Wild

#boku no hero academia #bnha analysis #my hero academia #analysis of hero and villains #deafmic #THIS IS A HUGE RAMBLING MESS #READ AT YOUR OWN COST #spoilers #manga spoilers

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sunkissedchldrecon · 3 years

Note

OOOH I've been thinking about making my own deck cause why not but I'd rather stick with my tarot cards (which are probably mad I haven't used them in forever)

Game idea: maybe something related to history or what people's fs, next relationship person's childhood were like or something short like if they know their fs currently and some things to look for that represent their person? Something like I 0lan to at some point do what people's future kids will look like adopted or not since I think that'd be interesting. For posts something like your personal thoughts on whatever really works or how you exactly do oracle, tarot, intuition and what ways you practice things.

Favorite emoji: 👹🤨🐜🏃🏽‍♀️ too many lol sorry if I should only do one maybe 🤠 I plan on getting a red headed country man as a boyfriend someday if able lol

I'd like to know what my fs personality if able?

I'd like to exchange so anything you wanna know I'll answer back!

Thank you and please drink and sleep well if you're able!

i was thinking of buying a deck a while ago but psyched myself out lol. if you wanna make your own, i say go for it! it's time consuming and hard to shuffle at first, but it's really cool since you already know how you best read tarot/oracle or read intuitiely. ty for the game idea!! things like past lives/karmic relationships are v interesting. karma in and of itself is sooo complex imo

as i keep shuffling, i feel a lot more comfortable with the deck btw which is exciting!! for the exchange, i wonder what can i do to set myself free? lmk if that's too broad or anything lol

lilies: purity, fertility, beauty, transformation, rebirth, devotion

5/55/555: changes, something new is coming, transitions, embrace newness, shifts

aries (reversed): confidence, spirit, leadership, impulsivity, impatient, direct, agression, straight-forward, independent, passionate

apollo (reversed): archery, music, dance, truth, prophecy, healing, poetry, light

aquarius: humane, loving, innovative, arrogance, self-righteous, idealistic, radical, rebellious, enthusiastic, communicative, tolerant of others

pink: love, compassion, sympathy, kindness, warmth, femininity, romance, timid, unconfident, emotional, intuition

when you meet them, they'll probably be in like a glo-up phase or already past it. they're the type of person that's adaptable and embraces change. with apollo reversed, i think they're probably more laidback versus the party animal apollo can be lmao. aries reversed kinda confirms that. it's not that they're a pushover or anything like that, they're just not one to make a scene or become overtly angry. they prefer for things to be harmonious. i think the aquarius traits and pink perfectly encapsulate them. very focused on wanting what's best for humanity, in tune with their emotions, and friendly. good with communication, and has a thing for romance. this is so cute actually

#sun hosts games #sun answers #ask #smndragon #astrology #tarot #oracle

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7-wonders · 4 years

Text

Almost Feelings

Summary: Just when things were starting to get back to normal, an accidental confession by Michael sends shockwaves through your relationship.

Word Count: 3148

A/N: Another chapter of Mad Love, done. Thanks for sticking with me, and I hope this doesn’t suck too much.

Life manages to slowly reassume a state of relative normality. After Dinah Stevens had checked you over and declared you free of Satan’s influence, you were allowed to actually leave your bed and once again have freedom. Well, limited freedom. Michael has been wary of letting you out of his sight, terrified that Satan will once again attempt to control you. Your father-in-law hasn’t made an appearance in your lives since the night that he possessed a cocktail waitress, which is what scared both you and Michael the most.

Michael had fully been expecting to be swept down to Hell for a thorough scolding about “spurning” the gifts being given to him. As the days passed with none of the usual indicators that Satan was near, your worry started to wane. Surely he had better things to do than stalk you and wait to once again try the plan that had already failed? Michael, on the other hand, wasn’t too sure. If there’s one thing he knows about the being he’s never met, it’s that he’s extremely patient.

The gilded cage in which you’ve spent the past days under Michael’s watch has become increasingly more confining. Even if you weren’t outwardly expressing your discomfort, Michael would be able to sense it. Although he wants nothing more than to make sure you’re safe at all times, he knows he can’t keep you locked in the house. Maybe if he was less of a lovestruck Antichrist, he would have no qualms about it. The power dynamics in your relationship have changed, for better or for worse, and he cares about your wants far too much for him to disregard your feelings.

It’s only been a few days since your bout of “food poisoning” when Michael finally agrees with you that it’s safe to return to class, but it feels as if it’s been months. Even in the largest house you’ve ever inhabited, cabin fever still runs rampant. As he watches you run out the door to get to campus, Michael feels a tugging in his chest that he’s come to associate with you. Watching the one person you love most in the world leave the safety of your protection is a pain that, unfortunately, Michael’s become all too familiar with.

While Michael’s dealing with emotions he’s never had before, you’re nearly drunk on the freedom that you’ve been denied lately. It’s not exactly warm out, but the windows in your car are rolled down and the wind whips your hair around your face as you sing along to the radio at the top of your lungs.

Classes, of course, you could do without. It’s the little moments, getting to laugh with your friends in class and holing up in your favorite hidden corners when you have a break, that make the monotony of lectures bearable. Michael, predictably, breaks the established rules of communication by texting you to make sure that you’re okay at least once an hour. Prior to momentarily being Satan’s puppet, this would have irritated you to no end. Now, you understand Michael’s motives in a way that you previously hadn’t.

“You look a lot better,” Mallory says in place of a regular greeting when you meet up with her in the library after class.

“As opposed to my regularly horrendous appearance?” She rolls her eyes, obviously not appreciating your joke.

“You know what I meant.” You slide into the seat across the table from Mallory, tugging your textbook and laptop out of your backpack. “The endless bout of food poisoning is finally gone for good?”

“I think so. I started feeling human a couple of days ago, and this is the first day I haven’t felt like crawling into a hole and dying since I got sick.”

“Well that’s good. I almost thought you were avoiding us after revealing your secret.” You look up, panicked at what she could mean before realizing that she means your living arrangements.

“Oh! No, I wouldn’t avoid you guys, because it’s not that big of a deal.”

“Really? Because with the way that Michael looks at you, you would think that you were married.”

You laugh nervously and pretend to search for a pen in your bag, attempting to hide your anxious expression. “Like I’ve told you before, we’re just friends and he was nice enough to help me out when I was facing a tough time.”

“It’s not a bad thing if you do have feelings for him, (Y/N).”

“I just don’t get why you and Kate are stuck on this idea,” you grumble.

Mallory’s gaze softens when she sees how her comments affected you. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you mad.”

“I’m not mad at you, I promise. Let’s just work on homework before we get too off-track.”

Of course, this plan works for a good twenty minutes, giving you just enough time to read and take notes from one chapter of your text before your attention is drawn away from the task at hand. Mallory had merely asked for your help in identifying the proper use of ‘affect’ versus ‘effect,’ which almost immediately led to discussing topics that have nothing to do with schoolwork.

“I think we need to focus on the real issue here,” you comment as Mallory laments Kate and Brennan’s latest argument, this one about moving in together.

“Which is?”

“Your own love life, of course.” Mallory groans, making you pout. “Mal, you haven’t mentioned any sort of romantic interest once since I met you.”

“Because I have better things to do than spend my time swiping on Tinder.” You can tell that there’s more she’s not divulging, and a good minute of remaining silent while sneaking glances at her has the brunette finally speaking again. “I...my last relationship didn’t end well at all.”

“Was this while you were still living in New Orleans?”

“Yeah. Actually, my decision to transfer here is what led to our break up. She wanted me to stay, I wanted to go, and that was that.”

You feel for her, but an interesting bit of information captures the majority of your attention. “‘She!’”

Mallory flushes, attempting to stutter out an answer, but you’re far too excited to allow her to speak.

“Ooh, that doubles the potential dating pool for you! I know so many people who would be so interested in you, and they’re just the ones that I can think of off the top of my head.”

“While I appreciate your excitement, I’m just not sure I’m quite ready for another relationship yet.” You nod in understanding, but Mallory’s phone chiming ends the conversation before you can suggest slowly diving back into the dating pool. “Ugh, I’ve gotta get going.”

“Yeah, I should probably go too. I have way too much homework that I haven’t gotten started on.”

“Wanna make a deal?” Mallory asks as you walk towards the parking lot together.

“A deal?”

“Mhm. I won’t bring up the Michael issue anymore if you won’t try and drag me out to go and meet new people.”

You have to hand it to her; she’s extremely good at bartering. “Alright then, we have a deal.”

Shockingly, Michael’s not waiting at the door for you when you arrive home. You find him in the kitchen searching for food, although he does look like he’s trying not to seem like he’s waiting for you.

“Hey,” you greet, hopping up on the counter and pulling Michael into a hug that he begrudgingly returns.

“Hi. How were classes today?”

“I survived, so…” you trail off, shrugging.

“And you’re feeling okay? Nothing odd happened to you?”

“No, I’m great.” Just to prove how great you are, you shove Michael away from you. “Could someone possessed by Satan do that?”

“No, I suppose not.”

Getting off of the counter, you snag a sandwich from a plate and take a very well-deserved bite. “Can I ask you a question?”

“You’ve asked me many questions about many things, all without asking beforehand if you can.”

“Well it’s a touchy subject, and people usually like to make sure that it’s okay to ask.”

Michael looks at you like he’s not sure he wants to know what you’ll ask, but nods anyways. “Ask away, then.”

“You’re treating this whole situation like it’s your fault.”

“That wasn’t a question.”

“Sorry. Why are you treating this whole situation like it’s your fault?”

“I’m not.”

Wrinkling your nose, you cross your arms over your chest and glare. “I thought you hated lies.”

“It wasn’t a lie,” he scoffs.

“Michael, you’re terrified about me leaving your sight and you do anything and everything I ask. It’s okay to feel like it’s your fault, but I need you to know that it’s not.”

“How is it not my fault? It happened at an event that I took you to, it was my father who poisoned you, and it’s because you’re an unwilling part of this prophecy that I dragged you into.”

“Are you your father? Are you the one who made me drink that potion? Did you take advantage of me when you could have?”

“No, I’m not, and I didn’t, but I’m the reason he tried it in the first place!”

The room falls silent, and you watch as Michael’s eyes widen. You wouldn’t have thought anything about his statement in the first place if he hadn’t shown any fear in his eyes, assuming it to just be a blanket statement since Satan’s his father. Now, you’re starting to suspect there might be something more.

“What do you mean, ‘you’re the reason he tried it in the first place?’”

“I-I--” Michael shakes his head as he stammers, taking a cautious step back from you.

“Michael,” you snap, patience running thin.

“Fuck, (Y/N)!” He runs a hand through his hair, and you’re shocked at his uncharacteristic use of a swear. “I was impatient and frustrated, and so I sought out my father’s advice for help. I knew it was wrong the moment he gave me a solution, but he was so angry that I even thought about turning down his ‘gift’ that I...I took it.”

“You knew he was going to give me that drink at the Cooperative event?” You’re oddly calm, something that frightens Michael more than any amount of anger could.

“No! No, I knew nothing about that.”

You take your time digesting this information, letting Michael stew in his anxiety as your jaw clenches tightly. “So there was another time, then?”

“Yes, there was.”

Thinking through every interaction you’ve had with Michael in the past couple of months, you can only think of a couple of occasions where he’s acted stranger than normal. Only one of those, however, involved Satan’s ironic choice of apples.

“The day where I had the weird dream that I couldn’t remember, and then you freaked out when I grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl,” you say bitterly. “You put that fucking apple there!”

“I didn’t have a choice--”

“Yes, you did. You contacted your father because you were pissed I wasn’t your adoring little wife, you put that apple in the bowl, you watched as I ate what you thought was your father’s gift, and you kept this little secret from me!”

The lights flicker ominously above you, a silent warning to watch yourself before Michael loses control. Today, however, those signs of Michael’s immense powers couldn’t mean less to you.

“I wanted to protect you. The second you grabbed that apple, I regretted even contacting my father in the first place. I assumed that, by not telling you in the first place, that would mean you weren’t living every day in fear.”

“You don’t get to decide what information I should and shouldn’t know, especially when it directly concerns me and my life.”

“I know that, and you need to trust me when I say that I am so, so sorry for the way that this happened.” Michael reaches a hand out to try and physically convey just how sorry he is, but you shove him away as you shake your head emphatically. The tears brimming in your eyes physically cause him pain, and all he wants to do is feel one of your hugs as he wipes your sadness away.

“How do you expect me to trust you anymore? You lied to me and put my life at risk, solely for your own selfish reasons,” you cry out, spinning on your heel and marching up the stairs.

“I don’t expect you to trust me, and I’ll spend every day trying to earn that trust back--”

“No,” you spit, coming to a stop at your bedroom door. “This isn’t something that you can just apologize a few times for and then everything is okay again.”

Michael watches helplessly from the threshold of your room, not willing to go in as you grab a bag and start throwing clothes into it.

“I know you’ve never really seen the dynamics of any sort of a healthy relationship, but surely even you should know that this is not the way that people are treated.”

“What are you doing? Are you leaving?”

You ignore his question, walking into the bathroom before returning with an armful of toiletries. “You say that you’re in love with me? What you did is not love. Love is honesty, and protection, and admitting your mistakes when you make them. Love is not lying to save face, or believing that you know better than the person you claim you love.”

“(Y/N),” Michael says brokenly, hoping to somehow find enough of a gap in your sentences to attempt and repair what’s been broken.

“You’re not supposed to hurt those that you love, and you hurt me.”

“I do love you, and I never wanted any of this to happen!” Now Michael’s crying too, blue eyes stormy as tears trail down his cheeks.

“You don’t love me, Michael. You love the idea of what I’m supposed to be for you. You think that I’m just going to wake up one day and fit into this role that supposedly is mine by prophecy, but I’m not. It’s been almost a year; either release me from this sham of a Satanic marriage or kill me, because I will never be what you want me to be.”

Michael feels like his entire world is crumbling around him as you zip up your bag and toss it over your shoulder. He has to do something to fix this, but it’s as if he’s frozen in place. You can’t even look him in the eyes as you pass, knowing that you’ll lose your resolve if you do.

“Just because your father doesn’t love you doesn’t give you the excuse to have a skewed idea of love.” You pause at the front door, hand on the doorknob as you look back at him. “I need to be alone for a couple of days. Don’t bother trying to contact me, I won’t answer.”

Closing the door behind you, you can hear Michael’s screams of agony as you run to your car and fumble with the keys. The key’s barely in the ignition before you’re driving away, angrily swiping tears from your face to attempt to keep your sight clear.

How could he betray you like this? How could he sit by, hearing you thank him profusely for saving your life, when it was all his fault? Your mind whirls with a cacophony of questions, all of them leaving behind a bitter disappointment.

He’s supposed to be your friend. Up until today, you had thought things were going well, and you genuinely liked your Satanic roommate. Now, you don’t know if you can ever even trust him again. This deception stings more than you would have expected. After all, you used to despise him; why should this hurt you when you had expected the bare minimum? Maybe this is all your fault for placing your trust in a person who should not be trusted under any circumstances.

You’re too lost in your thoughts to register movement out of the corner of your eye until it’s too late, a small deer jumping directly in the path of your oncoming vehicle. Gasping, you slam on the brakes in an attempt to save the animal. Startled by the sound, the deer dashes across the road into the tree-line. You should be in the clear, but a quick rainstorm earlier in the evening has left the roads wet. As the car hydroplanes across the road, you quickly realize that there’s no stopping its path.

The car careens through the deserted road, crashing in the ditch and coming to a stop when it hits a tree. Although you try to brace yourself, the force of the crash overwhelms any strength you may have. Your head smacks against the steering wheel, and though you only lose consciousness for a second, it’s frighteningly disorienting to wake up again.

Your head screams in pain as you lift yourself up, and you can feel a warm liquid coursing down your face. Gingerly touching the source, you examine your fingers and confirm that you’re bleeding. Throwing open the car door, you stumble and land on your hands and knees. When you attempt to stand, the world tilts under your feet, so you settle from crawling away from the wreckage.

Of course this would happen to you when you’re attempting to put some distance between you and Michael. Honestly, you wouldn’t be surprised if this crash was orchestrated by Satan himself to voice his displeasure at the situation. You try your hardest to crawl towards the road, hoping that a lone car will spot you and get help, but your arms give out underneath you and send you falling to the ground.

Staring up at the darkening sky, you can only hope that this concussion isn’t the kind that includes internal bleeding. There’s a chance for you to make your way to safety if you can regain your bearings, but the dropping temperatures make you worry that you’ll be out in the cold all night. Just as you’ve resigned yourself to freezing to death, the sound of feminine voices approaching you gives you hope.

“Over here, help me!” you call weakly, attempting to sit up to see who’s out there.

Four women walk towards you; an older woman with crimped red hair, two blondes, and a brunette. One of the blondes bends down beside you and, instead of calling for help, smiles at you with perfectly-painted pink lips as she strokes your bloodied hair away from your face. You panic as you feel yourself losing consciousness again, wide eyes darting around the group as you try to ask what’s going on. Right before passing out, you lock eyes with the brunette and feel a flicker of recognition.

“Mallory?”

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#michael langdon #michael langdon imagine #michael langdon x reader #michael langdon x you #american horror story #american horror story imagine #american horror story apocalypse #american horror story imagines #ahs #ahs imagine #ahs imagines #ahs apocalypse

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shereadsandwritesformelanin · 4 years

Text

The Baker And Her Actor Part II!

The Baker And Her Actor: part II: [The Dog Park]

Paring: Chris Evans x Black Fem!Reader

Summary: You meet Chris while making a house delivery for the Evans. He can’t get you off his mind, and to be honest you can’t either.

Warnings: profanity, sexual content, angst, but overall fluff!

Notes: I hope you guys enjoy! If you have request feel free to share those!!

Previous Part(s): Part(s) --> (1)

—-

Y/n’ Point Of View:

You wake up to the moist kisses your dog Haneli places all around the surface of your face.

The best way to wake up.

“Hey girl, good morning baby.” You say petting her thick fur.

You play with your pup entertaining her for awhile in your bedroom, practicing tricks and just goofing around.

“Hey wanna go to the dog park today?” You ask Hanlei as if she’d respond.

Even though she couldn’t talk you could tell by the way her eyes lit up she was fond of the idea.

You walk toward you small closet, reaching up to find something cozy to wear.

You decide on a pair of navy blue adidas leggings a black long sleeve you probably got from a thrift shop a puffer jacket and black scarf to cozy up in.

“Okay you ready?” You ask your pup

She wags her tail in agreement.

You grab her collar and clip on her leash brushing over her fur once more before locking the door to your loft apartment.

It was another beautiful fall Boston day. The way the leaves had turned a shade of pumpkin orange and fiery red, the scenery of the small town never seized to impress you.

You reach the dog park unhooking Haneli from her leash, pulling out a bag of her treats.

You thought to take this time to continue to work on tricks and commands with her.

Seeing she was only 6 months old and almost as big as you, you thought commands would be necessary.

“Okay Haneli, circle me.’ You can do it girl, circle me.” You command holding her favorite treats in your palm.

Just like that she circles you twice, you throw her two treats. You watch her race to get her treats.

Playing with Haneli you couldn't help but recap on last nights events.

You just couldn't wrap your head around why Scott Evans, of all people would not only follow you, but lurk on you page liking pictures from over 2 years ago.

Was Chris apart of this?

You couldn't help but think it, I mean it was a possibility right?

Unlikely.

You snap out of your thought when you laid eyes on your now bored 6 month old golden retriever. She wagged her tail waiting patiently to go at it again.

“Sorry girl, let’s go again. Circle me, c’mon you can do it.” You encourage.

You amazed at how flawlessly she executed the trick, bending down you give her the treat in one hand while petting her in the other.

“That was a good trick.”

The voice startled you. You stumble back a little clutching your chest

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. I just noticed you and wanted to say hello.” Chris apologized

He looked amazing, how can a man look so good but so simple.

He even had on the grey sweatpants.

“Oh it’s no big deal, I scare easy anyway.” You giggle attempting to relieve some of the nervous tension.

Haneli interrupt, breaking her way through your legs. You watch as she makes her way over to whom you assume is the dodger Kiara had told you about. You both watch mesmerize as your dogs interact, doing what they do best, sniffing one another.

“So cute.” You say breaking this silence.

“Right!’ What’s your dogs name?” Chris asks.

“Her names Haneli.” You blurt

“Haneli, I like it.” Chris compliments.

You wondered how he knew it was you from afar. I mean the way you stood versus the way he approached, it was strange he instantly knew it was you.

Was it because He and Scott were potentially cyber stalking you the previous night.

Just ask him, be bold.

“So, how did you know it was me if my back was toward you?” You question head hung low.

“Your hair, can’t miss it.” Chris jokes mimicking the shape with his hands.

“Kind of wished my hair looked like that, maybe if I wore a bonnet.” He follows

You immediately lock eyes with him not sure if he was serious or joking, either way it was indeed hilarious.

You break through your nerves laughing at his adorable joke. You could tell he was only trying to relate and make you feel comfortable.

“Well we should get going, I have to open the shop for the afternoon shift.’ You explain. “It was nice seeing you again, for the third time.” You tease

“Yeah I guess are interactions are a little frequent, but y/n can I, maybe have your number. If it’s isn’t a problem for you, no pressure.” He stammered.

Was the Chris Evans nervous to ask for your number? Wait scratch that, did the Chris Evans ask you for your number?

You were definitely just as nervous as him, but you could not pass up this opportunity to at least be friends.

“Um of course, sure.” You comply immediately

Taking his phone the screen trembled as you typed, you hadn’t done this is a while. It was so foreign to you.

For your photo you snap a quick picture of haneli, smiling down at her adorable face.

“Cute.” Chris chuckles taking his phone back from your much smaller hands. “I’ll text you later?” He says almost as a question.

“Only if you want.” You shy

“Luckily for you, I do.” Chris smirks gathering dodger walking away.

You felt your stomach churn in excitement, those damn butterflies were fluttering again.

His scent was intoxicating and his Boston accent was sexy, it was enough to make you crumble.

You hoped he would actually text you, with him being a big name in Hollywood you doubt if he’d ever been have time to get around to you.

—

Chris’s Point Of View:

Y/n looked beautiful today.

The way her hair was up in a beautiful updo, and her athletic clothes. Those leggings that fit her curves hugging her ass so well, she had a nice ass.

Stop it Chris.

Your outfit completely captured her essence.

To be completely transparent I had come here to walk dodger and get some fresh air, when I noticed she was here I couldn’t help but creep and watch for a minute, or two.

The way you smiled and laughed with Haneli warmed my heart.

Driving home all my thoughts were intoxicated with y/n.

Even though I lived alone thinking about you didn’t make my house feel so big anymore.

Your warmth made it feel as if you could be here.

With me.

Gosh Y/n what are you doing to me?

——

Y/n’s Point Of View:

You walk into the bakery opening up shop, fiddling around to waste time until a costumer graced you.

You weren’t one hundred percent focused though. Chris had interrupted your thoughts more than once.

Since him returning to give you the tip, him possibly cyber stalking you, and now running into one another at the dog park.

It was almost like you couldn’t escape him.

But you weren’t complaining. For the most with all of your interactions he’d been nothing but the perfect gentleman and he was funny as well.

So far no complaints, not that it mattered.

A noise startles you breaking your train of thought.

“Kiara I had no Idea you were here.” You whisper shout holding your chest

“Uh, yeah I work every Monday.”

“Yeah right, I’m sorry just a lot on my mind right now.” You stated

“What or should I say who would that be?” Kiara implies wiggling her perfect brows.

She saw right through you ever time one of her many talents.

“We ran into each other at the dog park this morning.” You confess chest now feeling much lighter.

“What?! Kiara shouts. ‘Is he stalking you or something?”

“No he was walking dodger and said he recognized me and just started a conversation, no big deal.” You reassure.

Big deal, big fucking deal.

“Big deal my ass, your smitten like a kitten and he might like you.” Kiara suggests

“ I don’t know it wasn’t like that. I mean he asked for number but-.”

If she wasn’t excited it for you before she definitely was now. Kiara drops the broom she was carrying on the ground and her eyes go wide.

“Are you kidding me!’ Kiara trilled. “He asked for your number, like how reenact it for me. I’m you, your Chris.”

“Okay so basically, he just asked for number like a normal human being.”

“Lame! I want the juic more must have happened.” Kiara remarked.

“No it really happened that way.”

“Let me ask you this. How long has it been since you’ve got laid?”

A question you had to ponder on. It had been a while, you were celibate for about four years after your last serious relationship.

The only thing that had been down there were tampons, a few sex toys and a shower head.

“Since him.” You whisper

Kiara looked almost shocked although she was your Bestfriend you had been on a few spotty dates here and there she could have been sure you were getting some with those guys, but four years.

“Uh uh, text him right now and tell him you want to suck his white chocolate stick off right now!” She cursed.

“No!’ You shout. “Please use your lady mouth.” You demand

“I need you to use your lady mouth.” She says pretending to perform oral sex with the air.

“You’re ridiculous.” You chuckle

Just like clock work your first costumers of the afternoon walk in. you smile greeting the small family pushing the thoughts of Chris as far back as you could.

—-

Later that evening:

It’d been a rather long shift. It was a beautiful day so people were out more than usual.

You enjoyed costumer interaction and spreading your brand so that was no problem.

You were finishing the final pieces of closing up the shop.

Counting the cash profits and tips. You’re interrupted by the pinging of your phone.

You huff in frustration looming down at your phone.

Unknown number: Hi.

Y/n: Hello.Chris?

Unknown number: No not Chris. I’m sorry who is this again new phone so.

Y/n: I’m sure you’re not looking for me! Goodnight.

Unknown number: y/n, it’s Chris 😂

Y/n: Actor.. -_-

You quickly switch his name to a secretive and rather suggestive contact name.

The Captain: what are you up to?

Y/n: Closing up shop, talk when I’m home?

The Captain: Nah might be to tired.

Y/n: :(.

The Captain: kidding. Text me when you’re home, be safe.

You were shocked he actually got around to you let alone wanted you to be safe.

You felt like the flash the way you practically sped through your work to get home and text Chris.

You were beyond excited, more excited than you’d like to admit but you couldn't shake the feeling that this was, this could be something great.

---

Getting home and settling down you took a shower taking your time, making sure to really exfoliate and moisturize your tired skin. You took your time twisting your hair, sealing in the moisture adequately.

You didn't want Chris to think you were desperate for him to like you, so you made him wait out for an hour, or two.

Finally at around eleven p.m you decided to send him a text.

Y/n: Hi :).

The Captain: Hey. Here I was thinking you forgot all about me.

Y/n: How could I do that?.

The Captain: Well maybe your boyfriends got you preoccupied ;).

Y/n: Single. :p

Why would he assume I have a boyfriend?

---

Chris’s Point Of View:

I can't lie I was excited to learn she was available. Through our text and interactions I can tell she was a genuine person.

After my last relationship I promised to let things come to me, yes I screwed up here and there going on dates who only wanted me for the label.

Maybe letting y/n secretly slip into my life undetected was what I needed, what I wanted.

I want to take it slow to protect myself but something about her makes me wanna go all the way and quickly, and we’ve barley talked.

---

Y/n’s Point Of View:

Chris kept the conversation interesting, most of the questions asking about you and what your interests were.

Knowing men you definitely knew he was figuring you out. Wanting to “get to know you more.”

You both exchanged questions back and forth.

He asked you about Disney.

You asked him about conspiracies.

You both dint want the night to end. The text were funny, serious, a little invasive.

You felt like you knew Chris forever, when his named popped on your screen it warmed you heart.

So it melted when you felt your eyes grow heavy knowing you had work early in the morning.

Y/n: Chris, I have to go.. I work early tomorrow.

The Captain: :( I understand sleep well beautiful.

Y/n: You as well.

The Captain: :)

And with that you put your phone to rest. Laying awake, lingering on his last words.

Beautiful. Did he really think so?

Your eyelids falling you imagine Chris cradling you whispering those sweet words in your ear with his Boston accent.

God I think I like him.

---

Second Part! Let me know what you think below!

Are you liking their dynamic so far? Is it moving too fast or the perfect pace?

(please interact this helps me be a better story writer!)

Things will heat up soon don't you worry!

—

Tag List:

@toniilaney

#henry cavill #chris evans angst #chris evans x woc #chris evans imagine #chris evans x black ofc #chris evans x black reader #chris evans fandom #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #chris evans x poc!reader #chris evans #slow build #slow burn #chris evans smut #relationship #avengers #marvel #captain america

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pufflyhallows · 5 years

Text

Butterbeer

Gif not mine

Pairing: Oliver Wood x reader

Summary: Oliver is feeling down with the result of the last game, so the Hogsmeade trip doesn’t seem too exciting until his friend takes him to an interesting shop.

a/n: I realized I had never written anything with a Hufflepuff reader, which is absurd! XD

Warnings: language

Word count: 2,412

********

Oliver was not happy.

Harry Potter had been unconscious in the hospital wing for the recent Gryffindor versus Ravenclaw match, in which Gryffindor suffered their worst defeat in three hundred years.

Of course Oliver worried about his friend’s health and he was glad that Harry was perfectly fine now, but the weight of the defeat upon his shoulders was too much. He was the captain, after all. He knew he was the first one to blame and he knew everyone in Hogwarts was talking about it, especially the Slytherins.

For that reason, he wasn’t too excited about the last Hogsmeade trip of the year, unlike his friends, who couldn’t stop talking about it in the common room as they got ready to go out.

“I’m gonna buy as many boxes of Chocolate Frogs as possible,” Noah said as he counted his money, “I don’t wanna wait the entire summer to eat those again.”

“Sometimes I forget you’re a muggleborn,” Riley thought out loud.

“I can send you more if you run out,” Leo patted Noah on the shoulder.

“Thanks, mate.”

“Can we go now?” Oliver asked impatiently.

Noah and Leo looked at each other finding strange their friend’s behavior, but Riley understood very well why Oliver wasn’t quite happy that day.

“Yes, we can,” she replied, standing up and motioning for the boys to go with her. And they did.

Hogsmeade looked just the same as it did on their previous visit. Nothing had really changed, except maybe for the weather. It was slightly hotter now.

“There he goes,” Leo pointed discretely at Percy, who had just entered Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop with his girlfriend Penelope.

Noah smirked, shaking his head. “That’s why he was in such a hurry.”

“Let the boy live,” Riley chuckled, “Where do you guys wanna go first?”

“Honeydukes! I need my Chocolate Frogs,” Noah patted on his pocket, where his money was.

Riley thought Oliver would protest, but the boy didn’t seem to be on the same planet as them. She knew where his mind was and she felt bad for him, hoping the crowded shop would cheer him up somehow.

But it didn’t.

“Where do we go now?” Noah asked with a full mouth as the four friends left Honeydukes.

“Zonko’s?” Leo proposed.

“Sure.”

“Oh, I actually want to go to Tomes and Scrolls,” Riley said, pointing at the bookstore across the street.

“I can go with you,” Oliver offered, finally saying something since they got there and making Riley a little bit more optimistic.

“He can go with you,” Leo repeated, “Noah and I will meet you there later. It might take a while, though.”

“It’s okay. See you later then,” the girl waved and the two boys left towards the joke shop, leaving her alone with Oliver. “Let’s go?”

He nodded, following her to the store he had never paid attention to before.

As they got in, Oliver realized it was way bigger than what it looked like from outside. The shop was completely filled with books of all kinds, shapes and colors. Of course his eyes landed on Quidditch Through The Ages, exposed on a shelf by the door. He inevitably sighed, looking away from it and going further into the store. He did not need a reminder of his failure at that moment.

Riley wasn’t searching for anything specific, she said. She liked to just go there and walk around until something caught her attention, so Oliver decided to do the same.

They parted ways, each of them heading to a different side of the store, and the boy started reading the books’ titles as he walked through the tall shelves, hoping something interesting would come into sight.

He could understand why he had never paid attention to that store before or why it wasn’t as full as Honeydukes. Unfortunately, despite having a nice variety of books, that shop looked abandoned and slightly dirty. But he could also understand why Riley liked it so much. It strangely felt like home.

A bell rang from the entrance, announcing that someone had just come in. Oliver looked at the door curiously, feeling instantly glad he had done so. Standing by the first shelves, two girls talked to each other quietly as one of them pointed at a book with a yellow cover. Oliver’s eyes could not drift away from the girl on the left, wearing a navy blue coat and nodding at whatever her friend was saying about the yellow book. Her beauty illuminated the dusty, sad environment, bringing back the life Oliver knew it once had.

He gulped, his heart growing a warm feeling. The girl was holding a small package in her hands, which he could bet was a chocolate bar from Honeydukes, and he suddenly felt the urge to know what she liked to do in her free time, what was her favorite Quidditch team (if she even liked the sport at all), favorite book genre, favorite drink, her favorite song, her name... Who was that girl?

When the two new visitors started walking further into the shop, consequently closer to where he was, Oliver grabbed the first book he saw and opened it at a random page, pretending to be highly interested in the words written there.

The navy blue coat girl waved at someone behind him, a shy smile on her face that made Oliver’s cheeks heat up. He turned around slowly and a mixture of euphoria with total shock took over him as he saw Riley waving back.

He did not waste a second before walking up to her.

“Who is that girl?” he asked urgently, not caring if he sounded too demanding.

“She’s a Hufflepuff, a year below us. Why?” Riley frowned at her friend’s urgency.

“How do you know her?”

“She helped me in the bathroom once if you know what I mean. Kindest person I’ve ever met, to be honest.”

“What’s her name?”

“I’m not sure, but I think it’s Y/N.”

“You’re not sure?!”

“It was a long time ago, Oliver. Why are you asking me all these questions?” she raised an eyebrow at him.

“How have I never seen her before?”

“I don’t know,” Riley shrugged, “But you didn’t answer me.”

“She’s...” Oliver looked at the other side of the store, where Y/N was. “She’s so beautiful.”

“Ohh...” Riley smirked, “I see.”

Oliver kept staring at the girl with a dreamy look on his face, making Riley laugh. That was completely adorable. And new! She had never seen him like that before.

“Let’s go talk to her,” she proposed.

“What?!” he looked at his friend, “No way.”

“Why not?!”

“What am I going to say?”

“’Hi, my name is Oliver, nice to meet you?’”

“Then what?”

“I’ll help you, c’mon.”

“Riley...”

“Come on.”

Riley pulled her friend gently by the arm towards the two girls on the other side of the store. Oliver felt his heart race increase instantly and his stomach get cold. He hoped his face wasn’t red, but it probably was.

“Hey, Y/N,” Riley risked, praying she had gotten the name right. The navy blue coat girl turned around and smiled.

“Hey, Riley! It’s been a while, how are you?”

“I’m good! I’ve heard about your dad’s promotion on the Ministry. Congrats!”

“Thank you! We’re really happy,” Y/N blushed slightly. “Oh, this is my friend Jade.”

The other girl held out her hand with a polite smile, “Nice to meet you, Riley.”

“Nice to meet you too, Jade,” Riley shook her hand, “This is Oliver.”

“Hi,” he said, shaking Jade’s hand as well.

“Oh, we know Oliver,” Y/N said, making his heart stop completely as he and Riley shared a surprised look. “You’re the Gryffindor captain, right? We watched the game last week.”

Oh no. Riley bit her lower lip nervously.

“Yes, I am,” he nodded, “And I’m sorry you had to see that.”

“Well, you guys made history,” Jade said.

“Jade,” Y/N elbowed her friend discretely.

“It’s okay,” Oliver reassured Y/N, “She’s right, we did.”

“Miss Allen?” the owner of the shop called from behind the counter.

“That’s me,” Jade explained, “Excuse me.”

As the girl left towards the man who had called her, Riley saw the opportunity to give Oliver a little push.

“Oh, I didn’t know Mr. Bennett was here today. I’ll be right back.”

And she headed to the counter as well, leaving Oliver completely alone with Y/N.

“So...” he said, clearing his throat, “You come here often?”

Fucking hell, man. She was probably going to think that was a pick-up line.

...would it be so bad, though?

“I do, actually,” she held the small package against her chest and looked around, “This is my favorite shop in Hogsmeade. It might sound strange, but-”

“It feels like home.”

She looked at him, slightly stunned.

“Exactly,” the girl nodded.

“I get it, even though this is my first time here. It’s a pity I took this long to notice it.”

“Well, it does have a discrete facade,” she smiled kindly at the thought of Mr. Bennett decorating it.

“Yeah,” was all Oliver managed to say. He felt completely lost in her smile and didn’t seem to be able to form any more words.

Y/N noticed the small pause, but the cause of it was unknown to her.

“So, how’s Harry Potter?” she asked to break the silence, “Is he still in the hospital wing?”

“Um... Yes. But he’s okay now, he’s awake. He’ll stay there for just a few more days.”

“I’m glad to hear that. The news scared us all, but I can only imagine what it was like for you and all of his friends. It’s very understandable what happened on the match. You guys were probably still shaken with his situation.”

“Y-Yes. We were,” Oliver agreed, surprised to find sympathy after a week of disapproval. “He was still unconscious when we played.”

“And yet, you guys gave your best. That’s admirable.”

“Thank you. Not many people seem to take that into account.”

“Well, I can’t speak for the entire school, but I can assure you that the Hufflepuffs do. Cedric even had a speech about it,” she chuckled, “Some boys were being... you know.”

“Thank you. Really,” Oliver sighed, feeling like a giant burden had been lifted from his shoulders. It was very good to know that not everyone blamed him. “You have no idea of how much I needed to hear this.”

“I do,” she put a hand on his upper arm and squeezed it gently, “But it’ll be alright. You’ll see.”

If he hadn’t been able to speak when she smiled, he wasn’t able to even breathe now that she had touched him. The feeling of it was so surreal, he couldn’t believe she existed.

“Oh, and Cedric has said countless times that the Gryffindor team is the second best in Hogwarts,” Y/N added, “After Hufflepuff, of course.”

“Of course,” Oliver chuckled, being followed by Y/N. Usually, he would disagree, but this time he let it pass. The sound of her laugh was too sweet to be interrupted.

“What I mean is that this last game won’t change the fact that you guys are really talented,” she explained, “Don’t listen to the Slytherins, you know that’s an old house rivalry.”

“Yeah...” he looked down, “I know.”

“Can you believe they had a delay and it’s going to take another week?” Jade complained as she approached her friend.

“Oh no. And how are you going to pick it up?” Y/N asked.

“Mr. Bennett wanted to send it to me for free, but I said no. I’ll pay for the delivery, it’s not his fault,” Jade sighed, “But I wanted it now! That was the whole point of ordering it here, instead of buying it at Flourish and Blotts.”

“Yeah, that’s a shame.”

“So, let’s go?”

“Sure,” Y/N nodded, “It was nice meeting you, Oliver. See you around?”

“Um... Actually, are you busy right now?” the boy inevitably held his breath as he took his shot.

“I’m afraid so...” Y/N looked hesitantly at Jade, who seemed like she was trying to hide a smirk. “We had planned to go to The Magic Neep now and then to Scrivenshaft's Quill Shop.”

“I can go to Scrivenshaft’s by myself, Y/N,” Jade tilted her head slightly, “You’ll be totally free after The Magic Neep.”

Oliver didn’t say anything as he waited for the two friends to come to an agreement. Y/N took a while before replying.

“You’re right,” and she turned to face Oliver, “I’ll be free after I visit the greengrocer down the street. Why?”

“Well,” he cleared his throat, “I was thinking that maybe we could go to The Three Broomsticks to have a butterbeer and... talk. What do you think?”

Y/N gave her friend a glance, but the girl smiled encouragingly. Oliver couldn’t help but notice the light pink color that Y/N’s cheeks had suddenly acquired.

“That sounds nice,” she answered shyly, “I’d love to.”

“Great! So, see you in...?”

“Half an hour.”

“I’ll be there,” the boy smiled.

“Now, we should get going,” Jade said, “See you around, Oliver.”

“Bye,” Y/N waved at him and followed her friend outside the bookstore.

“Bye,” he whispered as he watched them leave.

He could not describe what he was feeling at that moment. How could a girl turn a boring day into the best one he had had in a week?

“So?!”

He jumped on the spot with the sudden voice behind him. He turned around to meet the eyes of a very excited and curious Riley.

“How was it?!”

“I have a date,” he smiled.

********

#oliver wood #oliver wood x reader #oliver wood imagine #oliver wood fic #oliver wood fanfic #oliver wood fanfiction #harry potter imagine #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fanfic #hogwarts #gryffindor #slytherin #ravenclaw #hufflepuff #random tag #i'm stupid

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madeintimeland · 3 years

Text

im oversharing this got long sorry. just reminscing on shit ive thought about a million times over again

theres so much art i want to create and so little motivation. i should start smoking weed again bc every time im high i get my best ideas or at least like, it takes away the layer of film over my brain that stops me from being able to come up with creative ideas, but also im scared its going to send me into mental hell again. like i need to be in a perfect state for it lest i fear im going to invoke my months long existential crisis again and i Cannot be doing that shit rn. but also i wonder if its going to be worth it anyways if i can create something to leave on this earth again. like ive been so bad at creativity lately like i want to draw and produce things and im bubbling over with energy and i feel the ideas fermenting in the deep recesses of my brain like theyre nestled into the grooves and folds but i cant access them yet. and i know i can if im stoned. i might turn into a hermit hunched over my tablet all hours of the day just making shit tbh. i absorb so much of the things around me and i know if i try to make something now its going to basically be direct copies of the things i saw but if im high im sure i can actually create something new and beautiful. im scared of being intoxicated again but i was scared to drink again too and i got drunk and proceeded to love it and want to drink every single day because surprise surprise i have alcoholism coded into my dna and consequentially have an addictive personality in general. which is why i felt like my life was useless without weed. all up until i was finally able to get my hands on a stash that would let me smoke whenever i want versus when i would get a small amount every couple of months and completely and utterly fail at ratioing it out and binge it all and then have ridiculously introspective trips where id start to go a little crazy at the end (i have a distinct memory of looking at a meme that had a woman on it and thinking ‘jesus christ... what the fuck is that’ and then spiraled into thinking about how life is pointless but i didnt have enough weed to continue with that train of thought and if i did i may have had my crisis a lot earlier, it was just inevitable) i just felt like being high was the only time i could actually get in touch with my inner self again. like i used to before the thick clouds of depression and psychosis settled in. but then i finally was able to get high for longer than short bursts of time and it all came to a head where my brain broke and i have existential terror now that i feel im going to not be able to deal with confronting again. but every time i say that it never ends up staying permanently, it comes in waves, it all comes in waves. back and forth. i feel beauty in life and then i feel fear. i feel like its all worth it and then i cant stop thinking about the inevitable heat death of the universe and the pointlessness of it all. and then i get a hug or listen to a really good song and i feel like its worth it again. i wonder if this is just a period in my life im not a total stoner or if its actually permanent. anyways point is i want to make so much stuff that my hands ache and my brain rots when i think about how many things inspire me. thats why my aesthetic tag is #inspiration, its been like that for many years now, its stuff that inspires me. but at what point am i going to turn that inspiration into reality? im bad at initiative. my initiative is going to be when i pick up the pot again because im too lethargic and procrastinatey to create the things i want any other time. but when will that be? i cant see a therapist or anything rn and working it out on my own has been mildly successful, not bad, im not spending every single day in terror like i was at this point last year. it started all going away around august after starting in march. march 30th in fact. from then on its been a constant battle with dissociation. funny because just earlier in march was some of the best experiences of my life. i think if lockdown never happened this never would have happened either but at the same time im left wondering how anybody can go through their life without wondering about the meaning of it all and coming out the other side with purpose and resolve. mine was to enjoy myself and find as much beauty and love in life as i can before i die and enhance the lives of the people around me while i can because i feel too small to do anything on a grander scale. and im fine with that, for the most part, but i still get attacked by these waves of thought where i wonder what the purpose of reality is . i always have to smack myself and remind myself no dumbass you already went over this a million times, just enjoy yousrelf while youre here. but when im high its a million times worse cuz the only time i can get my mind off it is when im replacing it with horny thoughts and thats not the only thing i wanna do when im high ofc i want to experience and create and listen to music. but i mean i havent smoked since june. i think the 15th ? i could go back and read my journals to tell exactly when it was but yeah its been almost a year now and i feel like i might have it in me again. i used to love getting high and working on shit so much. some of my best works and most creative projects and honestly just most enjoyable periods of my life were when i was high. going back to what i was saying about early march 2020 being the best time of my life, idk what it was about me but i was just having a grand old time experiencing absolute beauty playing ark with my friends, feeling so creative and developing new ideas and experiences, and using the freedom and motivation i felt ingame to also want to explore the world irl. i seriously was close to actually finally reading my survival manual and start camping and shit and i wanted to visit my relatives in their hella secluded farmhouse in the middle of fuck nowhere kansas, cuz i did visit there during that time period and i loved it to death, i felt so free. two different relatives actually and they both had that same aesthetic about them. of course they were horribly racist but i mean, thats rural kansas for you. i just wanted to camp in their woods. its funny because that month was simultaneously the best and worst of my life. all because of weed! if i never started smoking or rather never found a reliable source at that point in my life i wonder how i wouldve turned out? id like to chalk this up to fate that im like this, maybe its for the best, maybe smoking again wont help me but maybe it will. i have a way to ease myself back into it i just need that leap of faith and bravery like i felt when i was drinking again. its funny because i used to be such a fucking druggie and i wanted to get high all the time and then after my existential crisis that all just. stopped. i feell ike everyone i know is sick of me talking about it but it really fundamentally changed me on the inside even if it doesnt seem like it much on the outside so i feel its right of me to talk about it sometimes. it makes me feel better at least. like this is jsut a thing t hat happened, not a fated break from the universe i cant come back from yknow? i dunno. ive rambled on way too fucking long and idk if anyones gonna read this. tldr i want to draw and create so many things and i have too many ideas to deal with but i only feel ill be able to unlock my creativity and motivation if im high but due to bad past experiences im terrified to get high again. i mean ive done and made some pretty cool stuff since then but the motivation and ideas are much fewer and far between compared to the absolute deluge i get when im stoned , whether any of my ideas are actually any good or if they were just high ramblings is up to debate but i think it gave me a really good way of looking at things and i made some pretty cool stuff and i miss it a lot but i dont know if going back to it is going to be a mistake or not and im not brave enough to find out if itll hurt me again or if im ready. yyyyaaaayyyyy hahahaha ✌

#this is literally just all about drugs and dissociation

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #306

i’m v talkative today so pardon my jabbering below.

What is the strangest type of candy you have eaten? I think I've had one of those lollipops with a bug in it before as a kid? I don't remember. What would be your most ideal profession? A freelance photographer. But I'm honestly starting to lose hope. Have you tried those coloring books for adults? Yeah; it's funny you mention 'em, 'cuz a family friend got me one for my birthday earlier this month. What is a topic you definitely don't want to talk about with anyone? I don't like talking about my sexual history, doesn't matter who you are. It's just uncomfortable. What was your first gaming console? An Atari. Is there something you're eagerly waiting for? What is it? *SLAMS FISTS ON TABLE* MAY NEEDS TO FUCKIN' HURRY. My tattoo appointment is set then. :''') Do you/have you ever belonged to an organization? If so, which one? I was a Girl Scout when I was young. What is something you're very passionate about? Nature conservation, gay rights (equal rights in general, really), the pro-choice movement, and then there are less "important" things like certain hobbies interests and such. I'm sure there are more big ones that are just slipping my mind right now, considering I feel passionately for a shitload of stuff. What are you studying or what was the last thing you studied? I majored in Art & Design with a focus on Photography in college. But guess who dropped out. What was the last present you gave someone? I don't know... I mention enough that I don't have a source of income where I can really buy anything. I think the last thing I did was a Christmas gift for Mom a year or two back of a drawing I did of our late dog Cali, whom she absolutely adored. Do you enjoy plays? If so, what was the latest one you saw? Not really, no. What was the last thing you achieved? PHP has helped me focus on little victories, so prepare for an underwhelming answer haha, but it's something. I Facebook messaged an old friend I really wanted to catch up with, and everyone in group cheered for me. :') It was really heartwarming. What a shocker that this program is really helping me once again. What is something you would like to achieve at some point in your life? I would love love love to take at least one "famous" or award-winning photograph. It'd be such amazing validation that I'm talented at something I love so much. What is one philosophy you have regarding life/living/purpose? That's... difficult to answer seeing as I'm trying desperately to find my purpose. I do try to live by this old quote a therapist said once: "Deal with life, or life deals with you." I think it holds an incredible amount of depth and meaning in such a short phrase. How would you design the inside of your own home? I don't know the details of it, really, besides that shit is gonna look like a Halloween house year-round. I can imagine wanting black furniture, too, and having loooots of decor expressive of what I love and find comfort in. Gotta make a house feel like a home just for me. What is a band you remember liking from your childhood? Backstreet Boys, duh. Do you ever get mad at people for not having the same opinion as you (i.e. abortion being wrong/right, meat-eating being wrong/right)? Two things: it depends on the topic, and "get mad" is the wrong term for what I feel. It's more disgust; ex., I'm repulsed by anti-gay rights people and want absolutely nothing to do with 'em, but I'm not like, mad at them. Do you edit any of your pictures? In what ways? Oh yeah, and it definitely depends on the raw photograph. I edit depending on the mood it emanates; like if you've seen my roadkill photography versus nature shots, there is an extremely distinct difference in editing style and vibe. I'd say in general though, I tend to like to brighten my photographs and add more vibrance. If you like to take pictures, what is your motivation? God, I could write an essay on this. I just love and am so thankful for the fact we can literally freeze time forever with the click of a button and look back on fantastic sights, beautiful moments, memories... It's just magical to me, and I adore contributing to that art. Would you ever consider living anywhere cold? Well yeah, that's my preference, actually. What is your absolute favorite food? The spicy shrimp fritas from Olive Garden, jfc. Would you ever wear snake-skin pants, or other animal clothing? Fuck to the absolute hell no. What foreign country would you like to go to for a shopping spree? Idk, considering I'm not well-versed in the artistic creations of other countries. Perhaps India? Japan? I dunno. If you met your favorite musician, what would you ask him/her? I'm asking for his fucking autograph and a hug while I smile my face in two AND cry lmao. What do you spend most of your day thinking about? I ain't gonna bullshit nobody, my PTSD. In some way or another, he's lurking in that head of mine through memories, flashbacks, wonders of what could have gone differently... but thank God it's no longer in the forefront of my mind after my first PHP. I've come very, very far, but especially when trying to blank out my mind to fall asleep, parts of PTSD strangle my brain until I'm just finally out. I really hope that changes someday. Where is a busy place you would like to go to? Yikes, nowhere, really. I like to avoid busy locations. Do you think video games cause people to become violent? Absolutely not. You are responsible for the decisions you make; music, games, movies, etc. have no deciding voice in stupid shit you do, and it's bullshit that people blame art and entertainment for such things. Vocabulary: What was the last word you learned? I'm unsure. Have you or could you build your own site? Absolutely not from scratch. The closest I've gotten to that is my photography website, but it was through the assistance of Wix. What's the best thing you can cook yourself? Scrambled eggs, haha. I do make some bomb eggs at least. Are there a lot of graffiti around your neighborhood? No. Do you have a hobby that forces you out of the house? If so, what is it? Nature photography. Would you stop eating meat, if you had to raise and slaughter it yourself? Absolutely. God, I want to go vegetarian again... Besides English, what other languages can you speak? I can speak a very little bit of German. Took four semesters of it in high school and became very good at it, but lack of practice has pretty much ruined that. Besides English, what other languages can you read? I can read German well; as in, I can pronounce most words I see, but that doesn't mean I understand what is written. Do you think you could make it as a chef? Gordon Ramsey would deadass kick me off his show on day one, lmao. What's your favorite kind of tea? It marvels me JUST how many tea and coffee questions are in surveys. Anyway, I don't like tea. I am an embarrassment to NC culture. What thing/person/happening has made you the happiest you've been? lask;dfjal;wekrjwe What's the most freeing thing you've ever done? Stealing my happiness back from someone who had no right to hold it all in its entirety. That shit's mine. Do you think today's kids are really impatient? Most, probably, but in some ways I can understand it - at least, in the sense that with the assistance of modern technology and advancements in satiating our wants so quickly, kids just expect it. I definitely believe that patience is something to try to be deeply instilled in everyone, though. I don't have an ounce of it (in most situations) and wish I did. Have you ever tasted birch sap? No. How about the young buds/shoots of spruce trees? No. Which edible flowers have you tasted? One of my favorite Southern experiences is finding a bunch of honeysuckles and tasting the honey (is it technically even honey??). Tastes amazing. My family's hairdresser lives down a beautiful path that sprouts a massive amount of them, and as kids, my sisters and her two boys would go tasting them while our parents talked for so long, or if we were waiting our turn. Good memories. What has been your worst restaurant experience? I'm not sure, really. What's the most immature, adolescent thing that still makes you laugh? "Inappropriate humor type jokes." <<<< They can get me sometimes, too. Have you ever had a life-threatening condition? If so, what was it? No, thankfully. Have you ever had a custom print done on a shirt? If so, what was it? I don't believe so, no. Besides making a tye-dye one in HS with our school colors. Wasn't my idea and never wore it, haha. Do you ever read other people's survey answers? It depends on the person. If it's a friend, absolutely, because I love learning usually obscure things about them I wouldn't have known otherwise. If it's a user I don't know from wherever I got the survey, sometimes, depending on how short the answer is and my eyes kinda just scroll over it. Do you like daytime or night time better? Why? Daytime, especially mornings. I'm generally happier when there's light around. What's your highest level of education so far? Some college. Describe your ordinary day: My average day is embarrassingly uneventful. It's sitting on the laptop doing shit on various sites, none of which are actually important, and playing WoW, which is also without true substance, save for social interactions with my friends on there. I spray Venus' terrarium everyday multiple times as well to keep the humidity up, and obviously eat and handle that kinda bodily needs stuff. Would you ever have a UV tattoo? Ugh, that'd be so dope. I've seen some awesome ones, but idk if I'd get one, considering when am I actually going to be under UV light?? Like I wanna be able to see my tat. What is the brand and color name of your favorite lipstick? I have one black lipstick, but it comes right off so I don't even like it. I only ever put it on to take pictures. What do you like on your tortilla? Just ham and cheese. How about inside your pita bread? I've never had pita bread, actually. What do you like in your burger? It depends on where I'm getting the burger. My basic is cheese, ketchup, mustard, a bit of mayo, pickles, and a light sprinkle of diced onion, but sometimes I add bacon and take away the onions. How about on your pizza? I have three I tend to pick from: pepperoni, jalapeno, or meat lovers. Do you work better alone or in a group? Alone, definitely. Which body part would you not mind losing? I'ma be extremely honest, with just how horribly weak my legs are, I could live without them, I guess. Not saying I want to by any means, it's just exhausting using them. Ideally, I'd take away something minor, like a finger or something. What common saying people use is absolute BS to you? “'Everything happens for a reason.'” <<<< Fuckin' colossal "same." I won't rag on people who believe it, especially if it gives you courage to keep moving forward, but I don't believe it in the slightest. If it were so, I'd like to talk to whoever is in control of those "reasons," please. What is the most interesting thing you’ve read or seen this week? I had no idea elephants were pregnant for two years, like holy shit, can you imagine. It was in an article I saw on Facebook about a mother and daughter elephant who are both expecting and doing well. Wonderful to hear. What’s the most useless talent you have? Ha, I'm a master in the arts of catastrophizing and jumping to conclusions involving people hating me in one way or another. What’s something everyone looks stupid doing? I'm one of those people who hate dabbing done by anybody, like you look like you're just smelling your armpit. Which kids’ movie scarred you for life? I wouldn't say "scarred me for life" by any means, but when I was little, I was terrified of the Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz and even had nightmares about her. It sucked because my little sister was obsessed with that movie, haha. In one sentence, how would you sum up the Internet? A source of incredible knowledge but also hate and misinformation. What would be the most ridiculous thing for the government to make illegal? I literally dread the idea of Roe vs. Wade being reversed. Banning abortion would kill so many people with operational uteruses and cause absolute pandemonium. How many friends do you have on social media and how many of them do you know for real? On Facebook, I have 124 friends, and I'd say I know most of them "in real life." However, having been on the Internet since I was so young and befriending loads of incredible people, a good chunk are "online friends." Hell, I'm more interested in their lives than most "real" ones. Long-distance friendships are so valid. What fact amazes you every time you think of it? Lots of things, generally regarding the stupidity of humanity. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done? Probably going to the beach w/ my old friend Colleen. We had zero plans of doing it, but she just called me one morning and asked if I wanted to go, and off we went. It was a fun day. What has taken up too much of your life? I'ma be real, WoW. I don't think I'm addicted to it like I once was seeing as I go through spans where I barely want to play it at all and don't, so I truly am capable of not playing it, but rather it's just the most entertaining way to kill time in my life. I just don't like how much time I've invested into a game over six or seven years regardless. Where do you not mind waiting? Uh, nowhere lmao. Is there an app you hate to use, but still use every day? No; why would I use it if that was the case? Who is the funniest person you know? My friend Girt is fucking hysterical. What three words describe you best? Complex, passionate, and creative. What makes you think you’re smart? Lol who says I think I'm smart? Who inspires you? Korean Jesus. Okay on a serious note, not just him, of course, but he's #1 in an entire universe of ways. Do you aspire to be like somebody else? If so, who? No; I want to be my own authentic self. How did you meet your best friend? YouTube, back when it had more social aspects. Which one of your accomplishments are you the most proud of? I want to say my recovery, but like... I wonder a lot if it's "enough" to be proud of with how scarred I still am? I still struggle with a lot and feel like I could be so much better by now if I tried harder. If I'm completely honest with myself, I think it's finishing high school in the top percentile of my graduating class. There was a ceremony for the handful of us and all, and I cherish my plaque probably too much. Reminds me of a time when I knew what the fuck I was doing. What's the strangest thing you ever did as a child? Thinking I had "animal powers" where I could invoke the traits of certain animals at will, like what the actual fuck, Brittany. What did your mother teach you? Christ, a lot. Dad didn't do a lot of the raising, honestly, so much of my core values and whatnot were instilled by my mother. She taught me to care for and be nice to others, respect myself, try my best in everything, and most importantly that she is always there for me and my sisters no matter what and can tell her absolutely anything. She was very serious about us going to college and saving sex for marriage when we were younger, but she diverged from those ideas as absolutely necessary with experience. I'm extremely lucky with who I call my mom, overall. What did your father teach you? Eek... Read above. Not a lot as a kid (save for riding a bike and playing softball); most he's taught me has come following reuniting with him after my parents' divorce. I remember we went to lunch once and talked about my breakup, and he talked to me about sometimes, you just have to let people go in order to be happy, like with him and Mom. He's very serious now about ensuring us girls know that he is always there for us and will help us in any way he's capable. What makes you feel powerful? "Powerful" isn't something I really feel, if I'm being real. What are you ready to let go? It would be inexplicably fantastic if I could let every speck of Jason go in both my head and heart. What is your most bizarre deal-breaker? I don't really find any of my expectations and limits as "bizarre?" They're all valid to me. Well wait, idk if you'd find it strange that I absofuckinglutely would not date someone who hunts, but it's not to me. That's a difference in a very serious value to me. Would you rather be hated or forgotten? Hated. God, I don't want to leave this earth having given just nothing. I can live with some people hating me for whatever reason. What’s the biggest personal change you’ve made? Accepting my bisexuality, probably. That's something that I consider pretty big for two reasons: 1.) I could end up with a woman forever, and especially 2.) I was originally homophobic. I still have difficulty in fathoming how I ever was. What are some of your short-term goals? PHP is finally starting to make me build these again. I want to get better at selfcare, draw, write, and read more, I want to drink a lot more water, exercise way more... Lots of things, really. What is the weirdest thing about you? Uh. I dunno. Probably that I RP meerkats, which is a very obscure RP niche for sure.

#survey #surveys #questions

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eeveecryptid · 4 years

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※ BORDERLANDS: CL4P-TP EDITION

Various lines that Claptrap bots have said through Borderlands 1, Pre-Sequel and 2. feel free to change pronouns if needed. May include nsfw material. ( BL3 version here )

"Wow! You're not dead?" "Hey, check me out everybody! I'm dancin', I'm dancin'!" "Unce! Unce! Unce! Unce! Ooo, oh check me out. Unce! Unce! Unce! Unce! Oh, come on get down." "Yoo-hoooooooooo!" "I am the best robot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am the best robot. Ooh, ooh, here we go!" "Hey! Over here! I'm over here!" "Still haven't found the Vault?" "I'm over here!” "Rrrrrgh...this isn't working!" "Unce! Unce! I think I lost the beat... but, Unce! Unce!" "Wanna hear a new dubstep song I wrote? Wub! Wub--" "(name) asked me to tell you about a, uh, ‘little sumthin' sumthin'’ s/he needs done. You should ask him/her about it!" "Did you find the Vault yet?" "Sure is lonely around here." "Oh my God, I'm leaking! I think I'm leaking! Ahhhh, I'm leaking! There's oil everywhere!" "I can see through time..." "My servos... are seizing..." "I can see... the code." "I don't like this... this is making me nervous. Take a deep breath- I can't breathe! This is just a recording of someone breathing! It's not real! It's just making me more nervous!" "I'm detecting a motor unit malfunction... I can't move! I'm paralyzed with fear!" "Please don't shoot me, please don't shoot me, please don't shoot me!" "Turning off the optics... they can't see me..." "The traveler will protect me. The traveler will protect me." "Good as new, I think. Am I leaking?" "The box is awaiting your attention." "Please open the box." "Yeah? Well, hmph!" [ gives the finger ] "Good luck!" "There's more to learn!" "Let me teach you the ways of magic!” "Magic waits for no one, apprentice!" "Still working on that quest?" "Shouldn't you be murdering something about now?" "Hey! You're TALKING to me! And I didn't even have an exclamation point over my head! This is the BEST day of my life!" "Sooooo... how are things?" "Hey, best friend!" "Yessss, look into my eyes. You're getting sleepy. You're getting... zzzzzz... Zzzzzz..." "Success! My spell to make you want to hang out with me worked!" "Stay a while, and listen. Oh god, please -- PLEASE! -- stay a while." "Away with thee!" "Don't you worry, minion! Give me one good shot at that (name) dude and I'll take them right out! I... just got some stuff to do first." "We've really come a long way, haven't we, minion? And you're still just as loyal as ever! Who's a good minion? You are! Yes you are!" "Yessiree! This whole place would completely fall apart without old Claptrap keeping things humming along!" "As a robot, I'm completely immune to (name)’s gas attacks. But that hasn't stopped me from incessantly cowering!" "And I thought bandits were bad BEFORE they had nightmare plants growing out of them!" "You already saved Pandora? But... but I'M the hero of Pandora! It's on my business card! I ORDERED SO MANY OF THEM!" "Sanctuary's gone? But the bank! All my stuff! All my crucial information! YES! I'M OFF THE GRID, BABY! NO MORE CREDITORS! Seriously, I owe a lot of people a lot of money." " The Vault Map is gone! Forever! It will never be found. Never, ever, ever-- is what I'll say to everyone I know while I look for it. " “ I can do more than open doors, sir/ma’am! We CL4P-TP units can be programmed to do anything from open doors to ninja-sassinate highly important Janitor-y officials! ” “ I once started a revolution myself. There were lots of guns and a lot of dying. You'd think I would have gotten some better benefits out of the whole thing but no, demoted back to door-opening servitude! ” “ ---Remember what? Are... are you my father? ” “ Are you god? Am I dead? ” “ I'M DEAD I'M DEAD OHMYGOD I'M DEAD! ” “ Thanks for giving me a second chance, (name). I really appreciate it. ” " Hey everybody! Check out my package! " " Let's get this party started! " " Glitching weirdness is a term of endearment, right? " " This time it'll be awesome, I promise! " " Look out everybody! Things are about to get awesome! " " Eww, what flavor is red? " "Where'd all my bullets go?" " Bullets are dumb. " " I need tiny death pellets! " " RUN FOR YOUR LIIIIIVES! " " Oh, s/he's big...REALLY big! " " I am a tornado of death and bullets! " " Stop me before I kill again, except don't! " " There is no way this ends badly! " " This is why I was built! " " You call yourself a badass? " " Is it dead? Can- can I open my eyes now? " " I didn't panic! Nope, not me! " " Not so tough after all! " " I have gaskets tougher than you! " " That was me! I did that! " " Don't tell me that wasn't awesome! " " Wait, did I really do that? " " Aww! Now I want a snow cone. " " Freeze! I don't know why I said that. " " I can't feel my fingers! Gah! I don't have any fingers! " " Why do I even feel pain?! " " Why did they build me out of galvanized flesh?! " " That looks like it hurts! " " Oh, quit falling to pieces. " " Is that what people look like inside? " " Huh, robot's don't do that. " " Disgusting. I love it! " " It's about to get magical! " " You can't just program this level of excitement! " " Push this button, flip this dongle, voila! Help me! " " Square the I, carry the 1... YES! " " I have an IDEA! " " Round and around and around she goes! " " It's like a box of chocolates. " " If I had veins, they'd be popping out right now! " " Roses are red and/Violets are blue/Wait... how many syllables was that? " " Aww, I should've drawn tattoos on you! " " Tell me I'm the prettiest! " " Trouncy, flouncy... founcy... those aren't words. " " The robot is dead, long live the robot! " " Take these, gorgeous, you'll feel better! " " Some days, you just can't get rid of an obscure pop-culture reference. " " Oh darn, oh boy, oh crap, oh boy, oh darn. " " Do not look behind my curtain! " " I'm made of magic! " " Like those guys who made only one song ever. " " Everybody, dance time! Da-da-da-dun-daaa-da-da-da-dun-daaa! " " I brought you a present: EXPLOSIONS! " " Is this really canon? " " ... You're dead to me. " “ Nobody hurts my friends! " " Wubwubwub. Dubstep dubstep. Wubwubwubwub DROP! Dubstep! " " I'll stop talking when I'm dead! " " I'll die the way I lived: annoying! " " Come back here! I'll gnaw your legs off! " " This could've gone better! " " You look like something a skag barfed up! " " What's that smell? Oh wait, it's just you! " " Yo momma's so dumb, she couldn't think of a good ending for this 'yo momma' joke! " " You're one screw short of a screw! " " I bet your mom could do better! " " Good thing I don't have a soul! " " I'll never go back to the bad place! " " I have many regrets! " " Can I just say... yeehaw. " " You're the wub to my dub! " " So... does this make me your favorite? " " What are YOU doing down here? " " We're like those buddies in that one show! " " This is no time to be lazy! " " You can thank me later! " " You love me, right? " " You, me... keeping on... together? " " You versus me! Me versus you! Either way! " " Dance battle! Or, you know... regular battle. " " You wanna fight with me?! Put 'em up!.. Put 'em up? " " A million baddies, and you wanna hit me? Aww! " " I am so impressed with myself! " " Ha ha, this is in no way surprising! Ha ha! " " Don't bother with plastic surgery - there's NO fixing that! " " I am right behind you, Vault Hunting friend! " " I can do that too! ... Sorta... Except not. " " You jerks have NO idea what you're in for! " " I'm so glad I'm not one of those guys right now! " " YOU! ARE! SCARY! " " That is in no way disturbing. " " I did a challenge? I did a challenge! " " Glad I didn't mess that up. " " I feel... complete!.. That's weird. " " I actually did something right for once! " " Hmmm, the possibilities are an infinite recursion. " " Do any of these come with a new paint job? " " Which of these gives me my free will back? " " The moon is not enough! " " I'd do anything for a man/woman with a gun. " " At least I still have my teeth! " " Coffee? Black... like my soul. " " Crazy young whippersnappers... " " I've finally got an electric personality! " " Wait, this isn't vegetable juice! " " Cool! Now we're both super-crazy-amazing! " " These are the best kind of cooties! " " Can I shoot something now? Or climb some stairs? SOMETHING exciting? " " Times like these, I really start to question the meaning of my existence. Then I get distra-hey! What's this? This looks cool! " " It would really stink if I couldn't control what I was thinking. Like, who wants to know that I'm thinking about cheese and lint, right? " " How does math work? Does this skin make me look fat? If a giraffe and a car had a baby, would it be called a caraffe? Life's big questions, man. " " Who needs memories when I can do all this cool stuff? Stuff that I currently am not doing! That's what I'd like to call a 'hint'. " " Does this mean I can start dancing? Pleeeeeeaaaaase? " " Ya know when there was that Vault monster scare? I had these friends, and boy times sure were scary! But, I didn't care because I had friends, and they were like... super-friends! And then they left me, but they saved the world and I was like 'I know those guys!' Even though they never came back after that I still knew they cared, because no one had ever been... nice to me before. ... What is this? My eye is like... leaking. " " It's really quiet... and lonely... (hums briefly) Also this 'stopped moving' thing makes me uncomfortable. It gives me time to stop and think... literally. I'VE STOPPED, AND I'M THINKING! IT HURTS ME! " " Oh. My. God. What if I'm like... a fish? And, if I'm not moving... I stop breathing? AND THEN I'LL DIE! HELP ME! HELP MEEEEE HEE HEE HEEE! HHHHHHHELP! " " Ahem, ahem. What's going on? Did I break something? " “ You hear me, (name)?! You killed my friends! You destroyed my product line! I am the last Claptrap in existence, AND I AM GOING TO TEABAG YOUR CORPSE! ” “ You think a door can stop me, (name)?! I was MADE to open doors! ” “ Dammit, (name) - how did you know stairs were my ONLY weakness?! Next to electrocution, and explosions, and gunfire, rust, corrosion, being kicked a lot, viruses, being called bad names, falling from great heights, drowning, adult onset diabetes, being looked at funny, heart attacks, exposure to oxygen, being turned down by women, and pet allergens! Your brilliance is matched only by your malevolence! ” “ I'm just gonna go ahead and cloak now. You can't hear me crying if I cloak! (sobbing) stairs, why did it have to be stairs? I'll never climb those stairs! ”

#ask meme #borderlands rp meme #sentence starters #indie rp #inbox meme #rp meme #rp ask #rp ask meme #askbox meme #askbox starters #rp sentence meme #sentence starter meme #rp sentence starters #inbox memes #indie starters #rp inbox meme

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soranihimawari · 4 years

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what he sees...

word count: 1.8k

tagging: @m0nstergeneration20xx

warnings/genre: gamer friends to lovers [is that even a thing?]// rated F for fluff

<< |master list|>>

hallway meeting [day 0] :

part of kenma’s daily routine was to roam the halls of his high school during lunch break in search for a stronger wifi signal. recently that proved to be a challenge considering the fact the wifi was acting all wonky during the aftermath of the thunderstorm that occurred two weeks ago. the dual-toned setter was about to abandon all hope and just suffer the penalty for using one of his many devices as a hotspot during school hours.

that plan was almost coming into fruition when he heard a rather pleasant monotone voice pleading with the audio visual club members to take on a new second year recruit. with a resounding and stern, “no,” kenma heard the door close when he rounded the corner. he paused long enough to see the girl in the class across from his lower her closed fist before releasing a short lived sigh. for the life of him, kenma could not remember the name of the student he was quietly observing, but that didn’t stop him from staring at the phone you took out from your blazer pocket.

you held your phone in one hand while using your dominant hand as a mischievous smirk carved its way across your features. you swiftly stepped away in the opposite direction of the clubroom with a few keystrokes of code being typed before you pressed enter. you pretended to not hear the screams of horror when you whistled a tune down the hallway. kenma glanced down at his phone to notice his phone switched from LTE to a new closed wifi server nicknamed “chaos fiber.” it wasn’t password protected, meaning the girl’s device picked up his phone’s presence. kenma let out a chortle before he turned on his heels to head back toward his homeroom.

that afternoon on the train ride back to their neighborhood, kenma was rather quiet,even more so than what his best friend/neighbor had been accustomed to.

“kenma, do you think there’d be aliens on mars?” kuroo baited a question to see if his friend would bite.

“mmhm,” kenma replied; his subconscious was busy trying to remember any noticeable detail from lunch. the mysterious tech angel helped him out, but he didn’t want the rooster haired third year next to him cause a raucous over it.

“you’re acting strange, even for you,” kuroo said when they were heading off the train and taking the stairs outside to the platform leading to their side of the tokyo suburbs.

“you think so?” kenma quipped knitting his brow.

“i don’t know what happened, but i guess it’s alright for now. you probably need sleep. don’t stay up too late, man.”

“ok.”

the next day right before classes were dismissed for the day, you found yourself tinkering with your mother’s old phone trying to breathe it back to life. you decided to take a break to crack your knuckles and stretch your arms when your class vice-representative, sayo-kun, said you had a visitor. Kenma did not come up with a valid reason why he thought his feet to moved on their own at lunch leading him to an impromptu visit to your class across the hall.

he wanted to know thank you for sharing the closed wifi name with him because he was able to finally play all this games without any interruptions whatsoever, but since he knew himself to be no expert on romance, he decided to text the team. ok, let’s be real, he texted kai and yaku. if kuroo found out, homeboy would have made a big show out of something so small like kenma’s first high school crush. kenma did receive some decent advice after making the vice captain and libero of his sports club team promise to not tell their captain right away for fear of scaring the girl.

12:05

ꜰʀᴍ: ʏᴀᴋᴜ-ᴢᴀ ʟɪʙᴇʀᴏ

ᴡᴇʟʟ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʜᴇʀ? ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʜᴀɴᴅꜱ ꜰᴇᴇʟ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴄʟᴀᴍᴍʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀꜰᴛᴇʀ ᴘʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴄᴇ ᴡʜᴇɴ ꜱʜᴇ ᴡᴀᴠᴇꜱ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ? ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴇ ᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴀꜱᴋ ʜᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ᴘʟᴀʏ ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ ɢᴀᴍᴇꜱ ɪꜰ ꜱʜᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇꜱ ᴍᴍʀᴘɢꜱ?

12:09

ꜰʀᴍ: ᴠɪᴄᴇ ᴄᴀᴘ

ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴꜱᴡᴇʀᴇᴅ ʏᴇꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴀʟʟ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇꜱᴇ Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ʏᴀᴋᴜ ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ᴀꜱᴋᴇᴅ ᴋᴇɴᴍᴀ, ʏᴏᴜ ᴍɪɢʜᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ɢᴇɴᴜɪɴᴇ ᴄʀᴜꜱʜ ᴏɴ ʜᴇʀ. ɪꜱɴ’ᴛ ꜱʜᴇ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʏᴇᴀʀ ᴀɴʏᴡᴀʏꜱ?

“talk to her, ask her out for some ice cream or pie at the cafe down the street from campus? practice is cancelled today anyways since nekomata has family visiting today,” kenma mumbled the last text kai sent him right before reaching your class’ door.

“can i help you?” your ears were completely oblivious to whomever sayo-kun was talking to while you pressed the power button of the phone on your desk, eyes lighting up with glee as it slowly powered on. You chuckle amused at your own genius turning your mother’s older (and by all means obsolete) phone into an emergency back up of the back up mp3 player.

“hey y/n! kodzume-san’s here to see you,” your classmate said breaking your thought process.

“thanks,” kenma said quietly brushing past sayo-kun stopping roughly a foot before your desk. He played with his hands a bit as you lowered your arms back on your desk folded on top of each other.

“what can i do for you kenma?” you asked, an eyebrow raised at him. You knew why he was there. you were the one with the wifi server that you closed off to the other audio visual club jerks the other day, but what you didn’t know was what piqued your interest.

“i wanted to say thank you for the other day,” kenma stated in a shy tone. he was testing the waters by taking a step or two forward in your direction. you had this sly smile growing across your face which kenma found kind of endearing. Have you always looked this effortlessly sophisticated? or was that just how nature laid out your kind features every time artificial fluorescent light made your eyes sparkle in the day time.

“ah,” you reply. you bop your head while adding a quick, “i see.”

a fleeting moment of silence passes between you two before you suggest something to him which nearly caused the aloof member of the volleyball team to be caught off guard:

“want to spend a free period with me? a have one coming up right before classes are dismissed today. i’ll be in the computer lab if you’re interested.”

kenma didn’t say anything else, but you took into account the way his pupils dilated in excitement at the invitation right before he accepted your offer. you exchanged contact info once he arrived at the lab an hour later where you helped each other in creating a small network of computers to connect to the fiberware and now password protected “chaos” server from a few weeks ago. every computer that was turned on in the lab had different operating systems running through (of course with the best games downloaded by the seniors beforehand).

“welcome to the chaos network. wanna play a game?”

kenma did not have to be asked a second time as he sat down in front of one of the computers and thus began a partnership between you and the pudding haired setter. you brought over an extra wireless keyboard for the game kenma chose to play, laughing with him as he began to design his lvl 1 character. you did the same when the game prompted kenma to choose to add another member to his party...

later that evening, when he offered to walk with you to the train station with kuroo saying he had cleaning duty, kenma and you found yourselves headed in the same direction for the platform close by.

“seems like this is where we part,” you say, readjusting your school bag on your shoulder. “thanks for accompanying me earlier. i haven’t been able to play that game yet. i had fun.”

“yeah,me too.” kenma agreed taking out his gaming console again. what you did next, you had no idea why you did it, but you just went with it: you invaded kenma’s personal bubble rather quickly pressing your lips onto the side of his cheek without any forewarning. you retreated back to where you stood in front of him before

“sorry, i should of asked if that was ok,” you apologize in a meek voice admist a now crowded station. kenma shook his head to indicate that it was alright. afterall, his crush just kissed him and his brain had an emergency halt of normal kenma-esc thoughts. “see you tomorrow at school.”

“see you later,” was all he managed to say seeing as you turned to walk to your platform number to wait for your train.

--[ three weeks later]--

A couple of weeks later, you were formally introduced to the rest of the Nekoma Volleyball Club when you mentioned that your gaming partner left behind his switch in the computer room during mid-class break. Needless to say you were bombarded with questions ranging from, “where did you meet kenma,” “what class were you in,” and finally, “are you going to be our manager? You’re practically kenma’s ‘player 2’ already, right?”

Nekomata chuckled at his team, recalling the days of his youth, when something eerily similar happened to his captain at the time.

“Umm,” you cleared your throat before you drew a deep breath in. You closed your eyes on the exhale and tilted your head to the side, curling a hand under your chin in thought.

“C’mon, you don’t have to answer any of--” Kenma’s voice was pretty even throughout meaning he was getting more annoyed at how everyone else got to ask you those pressing questions, but he had been interrupted. Over the past three weeks, you hung out with kenma more and more, seeing what was his level of comfort around you versus other people. Every time you hung out with him, kenma finally felt himself breathe a little better than before. His crush still clung on to him, so it wasn’t properly addressed until that afternoon when seeing you dropped by unannounced to return his console after you helped free the os for any bugs and malware.

“I met Kenma in the other side of the hallway where audio/visual club after they shut me down from joining their ‘prestigious’ club, so I launched a virus that killed their LAN party mid-campaign; class 2-5 [college prep]; if you need one, i don’t see why not? I’ve got time to spare. And actually,” your eyes never wavered off Kenma’s beet red ears from the moment you interjected. “I don’t know. You should ask him that when I leave Lev.”

[ The team’s focus switched back to where their setter was standing utterly dumbfounded by your honesty. You’d think you never saw a clowder of kittens look this excited for their ‘brain’ to find someone as wickedly smart (if not smarter) than their captain. ]

Scowling at the tallest first year on the team, Yaku nearly roundhouse kicked his kouhai for the third time that practice. Kai, judging by the way Kuroo and Yamagoto’s jaws went slack after you agreed to be the official team manager right before the prefecture qualifiers were announced, just laughed with a knowing smile. The first years on the team were so enamoured by your bold, yet casual attitude, they could see why their gaming senpai would find someone special like you. Especially since they noticed how Kenma’s usually displeased expressions seemed to have subsided to his version of “i’m not upset, just disappointed,” neutral face during practices lately.

“Do you want to be?” Kenma’s voice was the loudest anyone ever heard him speak, well except for you. This voice you had grown accustomed to when you helped him during a rare monster raid in one of the various mmorpgs you linked your devices to. By now you two were at the half-way point when you were walking toward each other, it was like your bodies just took comfort automatically as though your subconscious knew the other was close. Kenma was facing you and despite his height, you were a little shorter than he was while wearing your ballet flats.

You extended your hand to hold one of his, giving it a reassuring squeeze. Your thumb rubbed miniscule spirals to calm the tensions in his fingers down. Much to their surprise, their setter rested his forehead against your shoulder muttering a “please?” so you did what you do best, you pat the top of his head gently. you avert your gaze for a split second; you hum while you prepare a straightforward answer.

“I thought we already were,” you say with the utmost sincerity in your voice. “Let me know when you get home. See ya Kodzu-san.” Your lips curled into a hauntingly gorgeous smile as you walked away shaking your head. You chewed your bottom lip to stop from screaming in excitement. You introduced yourself with a slight bow toward the coach, asking him to cut the team a little slack with the remainder of time left for practice; you told him you’d also fill out the manager interest form asap.

“Did we just get my second player to be our manager?” Kenma was given enough time to process what he said aloud a few more times. Before he realized what he truly said,he took a knee covering his mouth in a failed attempt at hiding the widest grin he’d ever show his teammates.

Kuroo chuckled, nodding with his answer. “Yep we sure did buddy. Is she the reason why you were acting so strange that day?”

Kenma glared at Kuroo who held up his hands in the air like he was caught stealing cookies before dinner like when they were kids.

fast forward four days later, you found yourself in the comfort of kenma’s room. more so, in the comfort of his hoodie you saw lying around at the edge of his bed. you were stealth enough to quietly slip it over your head while kenma went downstairs to grab a plate of cut fruit from the kitchen. you were invited at the request of his grandparent who just happened to be visiting that day after he mentioned your name in passing right before he left for school that day. you were lost in your within your own stream of consciousness, so you were unaware that kenma was standing behind you. the sound of the plate landing on the corner of his desk in his room caused to you to turn around quickly.

“you look cute,” was all he said slightly lowering his head to kiss your forehead. you hugged him, sweater paws and all, causing him to chuckle when he made his way to his bed. kenma patted the space next to him.

“oh?” you hum in earnest. your eyes scrunching up when you felt your blush under your eyes glow a little more iridescent than before you sat down next to him on the bed. “glad you think so highly of me.”

kenma rested his head on your shoulder similar to the way he did on the day you dropped off his switch earlier that week. you raised you right arm in order to have your hand run through his hair and you could of sworn you heard him purr right as he drifted off into a nap. you felt your eyelids grow heavy not too long after, not realizing you were about to lay yourself down on the bed to get more comfortable with kenma’s arms loosely wrapped around your waist (and your hand lost in his blonde hair).

Later that evening/morning:

#kenma things #kodzume kenma x reader #5W's entry #what he sees #supporting teammates: kai and yaku #kuroo figured it out first though lets be honest

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