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david-talks-sw · 1 day
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Hello @David-talks SW,
I was just wondering do you, by any chance, have any quotes from George Lucas talking about The Sith or The Emperor's ultimate goal?
I can't find the exact quote but I think he said that Sidious' goal is to rule the galaxy, allow his apprentice to challenge him when the time is right (be it Vader or Luke had he turned to the Dark Side) and allow his apprentice to strikes him down.
All Sith is after immortality but from their point of view life after death does not exist. The closest thing to immortality is their own legacy. That is why Sidious is trying to find the perfect apprentice in I-III. He find that in Anakin. Vader fails him at the end of III with his fight with Obi-Wan Kenobi. He find another chance with Luke Skywalker and that is he is so obsessed with trying to convert young Skywalker over to his side.
At the end of the day, he doesn't care what happen to him as long as the Sith rule the entire galaxy after him forever.
It is consistent with what he told Yoda before their fight in the Senate in III: "DARTH SlDIOUS: You will not stop me. Darth Vader will become more powerful than either of us."
I believe Dave Filoni said something alone the line of Maul's own goal in Rebel Recon, which was a behind the scene show of Star Wars Rebels (2014-2018). Mind you I think Dave Filoni's understanding of the Sith, in general, is akin to those of George Lucas' vision of them rather then the Jedi.
I could be wrong on the matter and I would be thankful if you could correct me on it.
Thank you.
Hey there!
I see @writerbuddha already answered you here.
Let me just add a few more quotes for your information!
"The Jedi are the enemy of the Sith because the Sith want to dominate the galaxy, to control everything, and for a thousand years they have had a plot against the Jedi." - Sci-fi Online, 2005
The Sith just wanna subdue and control everyone around them, including the Force itself, to fashion the galaxy in their image.
"The end game for the Sith was to bring the world into a very selfish, self-centered, greedy, evil place, as opposed to a compassionate place." - James Cameron's Story of Science Fiction, 2018
I go more into clarifying the Sith's goals here. Here's another quote that isn't in the linked post:
Q: So what is the Phantom Menace? There are lots of different ways to put it. It's the Dark Lords of the Sith, of which there are only two. That's the opposite of a Jedi. It's somebody that works with the dark side of the Force. There is one Sith Lord is who trying to wreak havoc and take over the galaxy, and he is the phantom menace. I think you get the idea. There is somebody pulling the strings for everything. - Premiere, 1999
Hope it helps!
Edit:
To be clear, saying the Sith care about their legacy is giving them wayyyy too much credit. They're selfish assholes. The whole point of having an apprentice is that if they die, at least the lineage goes on.
But they're not planning on dying, they're trying to go against the Fates and do everything in their power to NOT die.
The Jedi are the ones who deal in things like a legacy. You tell the word "legacy" to a Sith and he'll laugh in your face, he doesn't care that his *worst case scenario* is safe and sound and will carry on without him, he wants to be the guy that carries on forever.
And as @unhelpfulfemme points out in the replies, this comes with a "might makes right" mentality.
"If scum like you managed to kill magnificent me, then I deserve to die for being so pathetic and losing to a worm, and you deserve to live for having overcome the badass warrior that I am."
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whatswrongwithblue · 2 days
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The Fire in the Sin
Chapter 3 - Overture
Word count: 6,733. Read on AO3. Series Masterlist. <- Previous Chapter.
Summary: Takes place slightly before and through the end Episode 1 Season 1 and during the events of the actual extermination day. TW: canon typical violence and language. Alastor is an ass for most of this chapter but you get brief moments where you can see he's still a simp for his wife, he's just having A BAD DAY.
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This AMAZING painting is done by the wonderful lustylita. Please follow her for the best Alastor artwork your eyes will ever feast on. The entire scene in the radio tower was inspired by this image.
Series Summary:
Present Day chapters – Alastor has been missing 7 years. No one knows what happened or where he went – not even his wife Mina, who has been searching for him. One day he shows back up and seems to expect a happy reunion with her but he won’t say where he has been. With the promise of eventually giving her both answers and revenge for the last 7 years, she decides to play along with his games, but she can’t pretend to be happy about any of it. Prequel chapters – Mina, an Irish immigrant to America, dies a violent death in 1917. She spends the first decades in Hell making a life for herself, working as a torturer for Abaddon, enforcing the one major law of Hell; Sinners can’t leave. And then she meets and falls for Alastor. They live blissfully together for decades, until one day, he just vanishes.
Chapter 3 - Overture
Present Day
Alastor sat on the balcony of his room, intently watching the road that the lead up to the hotel. He took a sip of his coffee, then checked the time on his pocket watch. This year’s extermination was set to begin in a few minutes and the hotel was short one resident.
Not that he was worried.
Mina had survived several years’ worth of exterminations without him and she was resourceful.
And she certainly knew how to make herself scarce, apparently.
No, he wasn’t concerned exactly but he was definitely agitated.
Likely this was her way of making a point to him about not knowing the whereabouts of one’s spouse during trying times, but he didn’t care for it.
As the residence of a Hellborn, the hotel was a safe haven during exterminations and therefore safe for any of its other permanent residents, including Sinners . . . as long as they stayed away from windows and doorways. Now was not the time to be playing petty games with him. If Mina wanted to continue to be stubbornly cold and distant, she could very well do so in the safety of her own room.
Alastor took another drink, looking every bit on the outside like he hadn’t a care in the world.
He supposed she could have found sanctuary elsewhere.
If his suspicions were correct and she had returned to working for Abaddon, Mina could also still claim her old residence at The Pit. That had been in her previous contract after all; housing, safety, and above all else . . . power.
Alastor sat up and squinted as a figure came into view down the road.
Well, he was almost beginning to hope she wouldn’t show up, it would have been undeniable evidence of what she was up to.
He slipped into shadows and manifested purposefully behind her.
“Playing games now, are we?” he said, delighting in the way she jumped in her skin, her usually sleek black tail fully fluffed out in agitation that he had managed to startle her.
She huffed at him and continued walking.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Sure, you don’t,” he said dryly. “It makes perfect sense to be out and about minutes before an extermination day begins.”
“I just needed some fresh air before I have to be cooped up in the hotel all day and night with you.”
“Oh, the horror,” he said with a roll of his eyes.
“If you’re so concerned, then why don’t you go back inside? I don’t need an escort just to walk up the drive.”
“An excellent idea, my love,” he said and linked his arm through hers before she could protest.
They turned to shadow together and appeared a second later in the hotel lobby.
“Look what the cat dragged in!” Angel announced, surprisingly awake and already with a bottle in his hand. “Or what the deer dragged in . . . the deer dragged the cat in- you know what, never mind.” He took another big gulp from his drink.
“Oh thank God, thank God, thank God,” Charlie said, launching herself around Mina in a bear hug. “We were so worried when no one could find you. Thank goodness Alastor got you back in time!”
“I was already coming up the road,” Mina mumbled and shuffled off to sit next to a very inebriated Angel.
“And where were you, exactly?” Vaggie asked with a hand to her hip. “We’ve been looking for you for the last hour.”
“I told you all we needn’t worry,” Alastor chimed in, once again using his shadow form to transport himself across the room and into the seat on the couch next to Mina, sandwiching her between himself and Angel. “Extermination Day makes everyone a bit restless. So she got a bit carried away while out gathering her thoughts? No harm done.”
Mina looked at him with surprise; she clearly hadn’t expected him to defend her. But he wasn’t about to give the impression to the rest of the hotel residents that he didn’t have the situation under control.
A scream sounded in the far distance, just loud enough to make out, but it was enough to make the mood of the room instantly shift.
A second later, the siren began to shout its annual alarm that the extermination had begun. It had just been too late to warn the first victim.
Alastor felt Mina’s weight shift a little closer to his side. His smile widened, knowing she was never as unfazed by these days as she let on. No one was.
“Yeah,” Charlie said, her eyes suddenly sad and focused on the hotel door, “No harm done.”
___
Alastor wasn’t the type to verbalize his complaints, but inwardly he had to admit, the day was proving to be particularly shitty.
In fact, his entire first week back had been more trying than he had expected. Playing along with Charlie’s childish and naive fantasies had pushed him far out of his comfort zone and the extermination had her seeming extra determined to give them all a wholesome day.
The only upside was that today was the first time since his return that Mina had gone hours without insulting or pestering him. Before his departure, they had enjoyed decades of marital bliss. All that time had allowed him to forget how difficult he found her when they didn’t see eye to eye on things.
Only this time it was worse because Alastor honestly was left feeling a bit bereft at her treatment of him. Nearly a century ago, she had been smart to keep away from him. He had been after her soul, after all. But this time was different. This time, he had no ulterior motives – not with her at least – he was just desperate to have her by his side once again.
Some of the things she had said to him, especially during the first argument in her room, had well and truly hurt his feelings. And that fucking pissed him off. It was one thing to confess to being in love, he had gotten over his reservations with that ages ago. But even to this day, he didn’t care for how easily Mina could control his emotions. It made him feel weak and distracted where once upon a time he had found strength and comfort in her.
And then to start off the day with her up and going missing the way she had was just the icing on the cake. Mina was keeping her own secrets from him, and the audacity of her hypocrisy had his already short supply of patience running on empty.
However, since the extermination had begun, she had been noticeably warmer towards him. It had begun there on the couch, her willingly leaning into his side for comfort. Then she and Niffty had disappeared into the kitchen for a while and brought back breakfast for everyone; some sort of quiche but in the shape of a cupcake that Niffty had called “egg bites.” He had been skeptical at first but then Mina had presented his own special serving, promising she had made his extra spicy, and they had been incredible.
Charlie then insisted on them all participating in some sort of social game she had called “two truths and a lie” so they could all get to know each other. He had been about to excuse himself when Mina had once again settled herself next to and against him. She had even brought him more coffee, knowing full well that he was perfectly capable of summoning it himself, just so she could make a point of being nice.
So he stayed, deciding that it would be a good opportunity to learn more about the other residents and study them. Plus, Vaggie and Husker both looked hilariously uncomfortable with Charlie’s proposition.
As their host had begun to explain the rules of the game, an explosion had gone off, close and large enough that they had all felt the rumbling beneath their feet. Mina had turned in her seat, eyes glued to the front doors, but her hand had gripped onto his bicep and held fast.
“It’s quite alright, Mina,” he had told her, “We’re safe as houses in here.”
Several smaller explosions followed, along with a resounding chorus of screams, and Charlie’s little game was forgotten as everyone sat around in tense silence.
“Well, that was a real buzzkill,” Angel said once the battle outside seemed to push itself deeper into the city center and farther from the hotel.
“Then why don’t we lift the mood a bit, eh my dear?” Alastor said, smiling pointedly at Mina.
She met his gaze but seemed uncertain.
“I don’t know, it’s been a while . . . and I don’t usually do it to make people happy.”
“Nonsense! I’ve seen you command an entire crowd into a jolly good time, you would do perfectly well just giving them a slight suggestion of a more peaceful time.”
“Whattya talking about?” Angel looked confused but he was the only one. It seemed everyone else was already clued into Mina’s ability and were considering the idea.
“You didn’t think the Radio Demon’s own wife was powerless, did you?” Alastor said, materializing a grand piano with a snap of his fingers. “They don’t call her The Siren for no reason, my friend. She can command your emotions and desires with a simple melody. Her real talent is making a person kill themselves at the sound of her voice but of course she wouldn’t do any of that here.”
“He ain’t kidding, either. Seen her get a dozen demons to turn their guns on themselves and blow their brains out,” Husker said and then chuckled. “Gotta admit, it was pretty a good night.”
“Yeah, sounds super fun. Just the kind of thing we need today,” Vaggie deadpanned.
“Vaggie,” Charlie said, “Alastor said it wouldn’t be like that. Plus, I trust Mina. She would never do anything to hurt us.”
“You wont regret it,” Alastor said, appearing at Charlie’s side and holding her by the shoulders. “It’ll be more soothing than the smoothest whiskey Hell has to offer. Calm your nerves in no time at all. Mina?” He said her name with a suggestive gesture towards the piano, inviting her to begin.
 “If you insist,” Mina said and took her seat, “Did you have anything in mind?”
“You’re the professional,” Alastor said but Charlie clapped her hands.
“Oooh, ooh, I hope you know this one, it’s a bit after your time but-“ and she bent over and whispered something into Mina’s ear.
Mina feigned offence. “I’m hurt you would assume otherwise. Not all of us are stuck in the past,” she gave Alastor a teasing look.
She began playing and the soft, happy melody filled the room. It wasn’t one Alastor recognized but he had to admit, it wasn’t awful. Mina was a talented pianist, and it was rare that she chose a tune when he prompted her for one that he didn’t like.
Then she began to sing and the magic really took shape.
“I want to live where soul meets body
And let the sun wrap its arms around me
And bathe my skin in water cool and cleansing
And feel, feel what it’s like to be new . . .”
The first time he had heard her sing, Alastor had been convinced she was working a spell on him. Her voice was truly the most enticing he had ever heard. There had been plenty of female musicians he had respected and admired in life and in Hell but never had one made him feel the way she had. But that was just her sheer talent.
When she sang and brought her magic into it, the difference was obvious. There was no longer any individual thought of his own solidifying in his mind, nothing left of himself but whatever her siren voice commanded. It was the difference between infatuation and someone taking complete and utter control over your faculties.
Nothing would unsettle and bother him more if it was anyone else doing this to him. But Mina had never used her power over him without his consent and he had quickly learned to admit, it was the most affective drug to settle one’s nerves. And with his own power being far greater than hers, he knew he could withstand a mental attack if he ever truly fought against it. Vox had given him the opportunity to test that theory ages ago, and the rival Overlord had far stronger powers of hypnosis than his wife.
The song ended and the spell lifted but the sense of tranquility still lingered in the room’s atmosphere. All of the guests, even Niffty, looked completely blissed out.
“Jesus toots, I feel like I need a cigarette after that,” Angel said, his head lulled onto the back of the couch, and each of his six limbs limp at his sides.
Mina stood up from the piano and bit her lip as she looked around.
“Maybe I went a little too hard on them.”
“Au contraire, ma chér,” Alastor said, putting an arm around her waist, “I think it was just right.”
Indeed, the following few hours had passed nicely, allowing him to enjoy Mina’s good mood while it lasted and tolerate each and every one of Charlie’s silly forms of entertainment.
Eventually, though, due to the limited nature of her powers of hypnosis, the charm had worn off and when it did, he was more aggravated than ever. The occasional sounds of turmoil outside were the least of his problems compared to the personal Hell he was finding himself in within the walls of the hotel.
Mina’s social battery had worn out long before his and she had retreated to her room. He sent his shadow in to check on her every now and then, but found she was being sincere, rather than trying to sneak off again. She was tucked under the covers of her bed with a novel in her hand, only slightly changing positions every time he spied on her.
He should be relieved, but it just bothered him more that she felt she could simply excuse herself to do something as selfish as read while he was left playing the extroverted hotel manager. The least she could do was play another song to keep the rest of the staff more subdued. A song an hour was not that much to ask of her on a day like today, and yet she had retreated from everyone like a senseless wallflower.
Charlie was on the verge of hysteria, Vaggie and Husk were taking turns on who could be the most Negative Nancy, and Angel wouldn’t stop making leud inuendoes at everyone’s expense. Truly, by the time dusk had settled, the only person Alastor wasn’t ready to kill if it meant five minutes of peace and quiet was Niffty.
He decided enough was enough and as soon as the opportunity came where no one was paying attention to him, he slipped into his shadow form and left for his radio tower. If he couldn’t leave the hotel, at least he could get some work done.
___
Mina crawled out from her covers and went to her bedroom window, peering out over the city below.
The extermination was still going strong, more than 12 hours in. She let the curtain fall in disgust.
She knew she shouldn’t have excused herself when she had, but she was so mentally exhausted she just couldn’t take it anymore. It had gotten to the point where it was impossible for her to focus on anything, so she had left. When she became overwhelmed in social settings, she got pissy. And she was really trying to make an effort to not be pissy with Alastor, at least on this particular day.
Mina sighed, knowing she should probably return the favor of checking in on him. Although she had pretended not to notice, she was aware every time his shadow slunk into her room to make sure she was alright.
Either that, or he was making sure she was staying put. Her fault for getting home stupidly late this morning, once again on a job up on Earth she thought she could take care of overnight. But really, whatever Alastor suspected, did he really think she was going to leave the hotel while the extermination was still happening?
She headed out to find him and quickly found the other residents still gathered in the lobby, though it was evident Alastor wasn’t among them. Niffty hadn’t seen him either, so in preparation of finding him holed up in his own room, she grabbed him a glass of rye from the bar as a peace offering. But his room was very much empty and that left her one last logical place to look; the new radio tower he had added to the hotel. Mina left the glass on a table in the room and left.
He hadn’t invited her up there yet, so she had avoided going up there on principle but if he was really there tonight, she had to make sure he was okay.
After giving a soft knock on the door to announce her presence, Mina stepped into the room and stared in stunned silence at what she saw.
Alastor was using a laptop.
His jacket and monocle were off and his hair was pulled back into a tight knot in the back, meaning he was fulling engaged in his task and incredibly over stimulated by it. The state of his disarray meant he would be in an extra irate mood, but she had always found the distressed look on him incredibly attractive. When he let his guard down it was for her eyes, and her eyes alone, and it showed his level of trust in her. Plus, it was just plain hot.
But the shock of seeing him using such modern technology was more than enough to distract her from her lustful thoughts.
“Alastor?”
“Hmmm,” he responded, not bothering to look up from his task.
“Just making sure it’s actually you.”
“Very funny.”
He wasn’t telling her to get out, so she slowly approached him, noticing an image of the hotel on the screen of the laptop. His hand hovered over the keyboard rather than touching it and the green glow of his magic ebbed and flowed as the image shifted around.
“What are you doing up here?”
“I’m  . . . fuck,” he hissed through his strained smile and pinned his ears back. The laptop screen flickered to black for a second and when it came back on, the program he had been trying to use had clearly crashed. “I’m working on something. Someone around this Hell forsaken place should be.”
Mina put a hand on his shoulder and he tensed beneath her fingers but didn’t shrug her off.
“Can you do whatever this is downstairs? I don’t like you up here, it’s not safe right now.”
“I’m fine,” he said and this time he did push her hand off.
Mina crossed her arms and looked down at him, her tail swishing in agitation behind her.
“Al, please. You can have as much solitary confinement as you want in your room, to do whatever this is, where an angel is far less to break through the glass and exterminate you.”
“No one but you is annoying enough to bother me up here,” he mumbled, still not turning to look at her.
“Oh, I’m annoying now?”
“Yes, terribly so.”
“Well better annoying than dead! Not even the great Radio Demon is immune to an exterminator’s blade so you get your arrogant, narcissistic, egotistical ass downstairs unless you plan on disappearing for good this time.”
Alastor slammed the laptop shut and Mina was shocked it didn’t break in half from the force. He stood and as she blinked, he was back in his normal attire; jacket perfectly in place and hair down, though it was more frazzled than usual.
“And would that make you happy, my dear?” He sneered; eyes turned to dials as his temper began to take over. “I may be all those things and more but you have been nothing less than a cold, stubborn, secretive, hypocritic little shrew since I’ve returned.”
She glared back up at him, a solid head taller than her even if he hadn’t quite begun to morph into his full demon form.
“Sit down,” she said.
He tilted his head. “Pardon?”
“Sit,” she repeated, pointing a claw at his chair. Then after a beat she added, “Please.”
He complied and returned to his normal visage, though the upper half of his face was still stuck in a deep scowl.
Without invitation, Mina set herself in his lap and kissed him.
Alastor went rigid at first but as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled herself tighter against him, she felt him relax beneath her.
He began to kiss her back in earnest and she felt his hands tighten around her waist, his claws digging into the flesh of her upper thighs.
It was the first real moment of intimacy between them besides the quick kiss he had given her on the first night of his return. She parted her lips and he responded well, and as his tongue met hers she felt the vibration of a purr beginning in the back of her throat. It was undeniable at this moment how much she had missed him and how starved for his affection she was, and it caused her near physical pain to pull away when she did.
“Let me be absolutely clear,” she panted, still holding onto the sides of his face “I am still very upset. It’s taking all of my self-control not to lash out at any given second with you. But I’m also still madly, desperately in love with you, and am not about to lose you all over again. So please,” she pressed a kiss to his forehead, “get your precious, infuriating tail downstairs where I can remain angry without also having to worry for you.”
Alastor’s smile dropped into a thin line and for a moment he looked so sad. It was such a foreign expression on his face that Mina almost didn’t recognize it for what it was and then in a moment, it was gone, replaced by the wide, sharp-toothed smile she was used to.
She could tell he was trying to come up with another stinging remark, but just as he opened his mouth to speak, a bright flash of yellow light lit up the room. He turned his gaze to peer at something behind her and Mina stood and turned as well, looking out the large window at the destruction happening outside.
A horde of angels had come within a few hundred yards of the hotel and one of them was armed with some sort of light-wielding weapon and using it on a fleeing group of Sinners. Several angels broke free from their arial assault and descended on what was left of the scattering crowd, their spears glinting in the dim light, even at this distance.
How was this not blasphemous? Angelic beings straight from heaven getting to kill in the name of their cause while she had been sent to Hell for simply doing what she had to do to survive. And what of it if she had enjoyed it? These angels were doing far worse than she ever had while she was alive, and they clearly had as much lust for violence as she did.
“Darling,” Alastor said, standing up from behind her, “I believe we were in the middle of something.”
“I know, it’s just,” Mina said, eyes still glued to the scene of carnage below them, “I hate them. So much. I just-“
Another flash of light from whatever that horrible weapon was and Mina felt Alastor grab her arm.
“Time to go,” he said and felt the familiar light weight feeling of his shadow before she was being pulled down.
They were back in his room in an instant but he was no longer beside her. Rather, she was left standing in the middle of the normal portion of the room while he had materialized a full work bench and seat in his bayou, his focus already seemingly back on his work.
Mina knew it was just an act. He was just as affected as she was, he was just better at shutting it out, but she still hated him for it in that moment. How could he keep going like this, just pretending he wasn’t in just as much pain and turmoil as she was? She wanted to scream at him, claw at him, make him beg to take her back, make him show her that he wanted her just as badly as she wanted him.
And why couldn’t she set her own pride aside for one night? She should go to him, tell him that none of it mattered, that she forgave him as long as he was still hers, and continue on with the kiss she had given him up in his tower. He could take her and fuck her right there on the floor of his room and it would be like none of the pain of tonight or the last seven years had ever happened.
But that wouldn’t be like either of them.
Intimacy was a struggle with Alastor. He always had to be in the exact right state of mind for it to be of interest to him. Only then would he let his guard down. Only then, could he be soft and sweet with her. And as much as her body ached for that side of him, Mina’s heart was still too bruised to give him what he would need in order to fulfill both of their desires. She could do it; the moment they had shared a minute ago had proved he was still susceptible to her advances, but it would mean letting him believe she trusted him again. And that was the crux of their situation. He demanded trust from her when, right now, she had almost none to give.
With regret, Mina grabbed the whisky glass she had left on the dresser before and walked towards him, setting it beside him without a word.
As she turned away, she saw from the corner of her eye his confused glance at the glass.
“Mina,” he said her name with the same trace of regret she felt but rather than give in, she simply walked out the door and let it shut behind her.
___
The morning came and with it, the end of the extermination. It had raged well into the evening hours, but it had given Alastor the opportunity he needed to complete his task. As deplorable as he found working with this kind of technology, it needed to be done to set the next part of his plan in motion, and it was a welcome distraction from his personal problems.
He couldn’t be wrapped up in his exasperation with having to make this blasted commercial and succumb to his turmoil over the state of his marriage. He simply didn’t have the emotional capacity for all of that at once. So, he had chosen one over the other and figured he would deal with the consequences in the morning.
Thankfully, Mina had seemed to resign herself to at least being cordial in front of the other residents. If she was still smarting from his abrupt dismissal of her advances the night before, she was being classy enough to act as if all was well when they had an audience. Perhaps today would be a better day, after all.
She had easily agreed to join the others in the lobby for his presentation and as the commercial began, it quickly became evident she was the only one who appeared entertained by his efforts.
Could she tell he had purposefully done an awful job? He couldn’t be certain, but she was failing to totally suppress a grin and as she made eye contact with him, there was a kind of familiar knowing in her look.
That shared glance between them meant more to him than the rather passionate kiss she had given him the night before.
As the commercial ended, so did their moment, and he focused his attention back to where it needed to be.
“So, what do you think?” he asked, acting for all the world as if he expected Charlie and Vaggie to be pleased, which of course they weren’t.
“I’m sorry, what the fuck was that?” the loud little one began, followed by Charlie’s pathetic attempt to smooth things over. If she was really going to rule Hell and be the powerful force he would eventually need her to be, she really needed to work on her authoritative tone.
“Bad, the word you’re looking for is bad,” Vaggie interrupted.
“Funny, I was going for hilarious.”
Mina failed to stifle a chuckle and Vaggie turned her head to glare at her. “It’s not hilarious.”
Mina just raised an eyebrow at her.  
“Ugh, of course you’re on his side,” Vaggie huffed and turned her frustration back on Alastor. “It didn’t even explain anything about how we’re trying to save demons from extermination, which is the whole fucking point.”
Charlie started up again and the three of them went back and forth for a minute, Alastor purposefully riling Vaggie up until she was on her feet on the couch, trying to add height to her indignation.
“You been here a week and you – both of you,” she exclaimed, pointing dramatically at Alastor and then Mina, “are supposed to be helping, and instead you’re mocking us.”
“Oh don’t drag me into this,” Mina said, crossing her arms, “I got Charlie that spot on the news and that would have been plenty helpful if she had done a decent job of it.”
“And you don’t think we find it suspicious that the news spot you got her is what supposedly got Alastor’s attention, huh? After you made such a big deal about looking for him?” Vaggie countered.
Alastor’s smile grew as he watched the tension between the women in the room grow even more.
Mina’s ears pinned themselves out to the side as she eyed the petite demon up and down.
“You don’t want to go there with me, love. Trust me.”
“You want me to trust you?!” Vaggie exclaimed, “Then get him to fix that disaster of a commercial because no one is going to want to come to a place that a powerful Overlord like him thinks is a waste of time.”
Vaggie sat back down and Alastor was just considering if the time had come to make his move when Angel raised a hand.
“What?!” Vaggie snapped.
“If in ya filming a commercial, can I suggest you take advantage of the talented celebrity you got right here?”
“Angel, you’re a porn star,” Vaggie said unimpressed and as they bantered, Alastor slithered his shadow form across the room to reappear closure to the cause of further discourse, just in time for Angel to predictably suggest that he make a sex tape with him.
“Aha! Never going to happen.”
“Will you stop hitting on my husband?” Mina said, all traces of her previous good mood gone as Vaggie and Angel unintentionally got on her last nerve.
“There’s no need to be jealous, baby,” Angel said, “You could join in. I usually charge extra for girls but if it’s in the name of helping out the hotel, I’ll give you a freebie.”
Mina growled as she stomped over to where the spider demon lay sprawled across the couch.
“Whoa whoa whoa,” Angel held up all four hands in submission, “I’m just kidding around, no need to get violent.”
“I swear,” she said, a finger pointed right in his face, “come onto either of us one more time an’ I’ll cauterize every single one of those holes you use to make a livin’.”
“Jesus, Alastor, your missus is a little tense,” Angel said, brave enough to turn away from the angry feline to look up at the deer demon who was clearly enjoying the chaos. “You really haven’t fucked her since you got back, have ya?
Before Mina could react, Alastor whisked them both away via shadow back to Charlie and Vaggie’s side of the room. Her jealousy was never sourced from an insecurity of Alastor’s faithfulness to her, but rather from feeling disrespected by anyone who would dare tread on her territory. The feeling was mutual, and they had both had their moments in the past where someone’s leud comment got the better of them, but now was not the time or place for violence.
Thankfully putting the space between her and Angel, as well as keeping a well-placed hand around her hips, created an instant calming affect the hot-headed Irish woman.
They watched together as Charlie attempted to diffuse the situation more and Angel just continued making suggestive comments, though they were at least self-deprecating now.
Then, right on cue, Charlie’s phone went off and she dismissed herself to talk to her father.
“Hey, I have question,” Angel said, finally changing the subject away from his body parts, “if freaky-face over there is so powerful, then why can’t he just make people stay here?”
“Oh, trust me,” Alastor laughed, before quickly extending his antlers, “I can.”
Before he could truly revel in the look of fear on their faces and the look of delight on Mina’s, Husker decided to put in his two cents, and it started another round of Angel’s inappropriate and pointless flirting. It only came to an end when Vaggie stepped in, making the point that Sinners were supposed to choose the hotel.
“Well whatta ‘bout her?” Angel asked, gesturing towards Mina, “can’t she just go downtown and sing one of her trippy little tunes to get people feeling like they want to be better people?”
Vaggie groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose between her fingers. “Absolutely not. What is it about the concept of choice that you aren’t getting?”
Alastor watched with amusement as the drunkard and the self-righteous continued to clash, not failing to notice that Mina had fully calmed down and had stepped away, trying to subtly eavesdrop on Charlie’s phone call. His wife’s instincts were still sharp as ever as to what was really worth paying attention to. It impressed and excited him. As long as he couldn’t explain anything to her himself, he needed Mina to be on her toes and trying to work things out on her own.
Lucifer must have finally wrapped things up – honestly how long did it take to ask a simple favor – because Charlie had pulled Vaggie aside, then quickly bounded out of the hotel and down the street, as Mina curiously watched the whole scene unfold.
It was time for the real fun of the day to begin.
____
Once they were done filming the commercial and were waiting for Charlie’s return, Mina took the opportunity to talk in private with Vaggie.
“Alastor made a deal with you, didn’t he?” she asked, cutting to the chase.
“Wait, you didn’t know?” Vaggie asked.
Mina knew he had purposefully done an awful job with the original commercial he created. He didn’t take the hotel any more seriously than she did, but he was a showman at heart and would have easily been able to come up with something more convincing than that if he had actually been trying.
She could tell immediately he was toying with them, drawing Charlie in with the idea of the commercial, but then not fully delivering until he got something in return. Then suddenly he and Vaggie returned to the lobby and the plan was a go.
So Mina ignored Vaggie’s question, not liking the implication that Alastor hadn’t let her in on his plan. True, he was hiding a lot from her, but this just all felt so painfully obvious, she didn’t feel the need to be clued in beforehand.
“What were the terms of the deal?”
“Well, that’s the weird part,” Vaggie said, “it wasn’t a big deal. He just said he would help film a decent commercial if I promised to not make him do any TV related stuff in the future.”
“Huh,” Mina said, already forming theories in her head and turned to walk away.
“Wait,” Vaggie stopped her, “you don’t think it’s more than that, right?”
Mina paused, knowing she was at a crossroads. She could do things Alastor’s way and dismiss Vaggie’s concern and pretend nothing was wrong. But Vaggie was likely too smart for that, and it would ultimately cause more distrust between them. The other option was to display just enough honesty to make it appear Mina really was on her side. If Alastor was being even a little honest with Mina, then it was true he needed to gain Charlie’s trust to get along with whatever plan of his he was concocting. And Mina seemed to have figured out before Alastor had that Vaggie was the real path to gaining Charlie’s trust.
Mina made a show of sighing and looking defeated.
“Vaggie, look, you’re a smart girl. And despite you clearly having a problem with me since day one, I respect you. So, I’ll be honest with you. I really don’t know what Alastor’s planning, but I do know him. And he never makes a simple deal, there’s always a catch. It’s either going to benefit himself more than he’s letting on or it’s going to hurt you more than he’s letting on. Sometimes both.” Mina put a hand on Vaggie’s shoulder and did her very best to look concerned. “Just promise me, if he tries making another one, you’ll tell me about it before you agree to anything, okay?”
“Okay,” Vaggie agreed, “And hey, I know things got a little tense before . . . I guess I shouldn’t have tried accusing you-“
“It’s fine,” Mina smiled, “water under the bridge.”
Later, even when they had a moment alone, she didn’t confront him about the deal. It almost certainly had something to do with Vox. Either he was using the deal to protect the hotel from Vox’s reach or he would use the deal in the future so that Vaggie couldn’t force him to get involved if Vox were to ever jeopardize the hotel in a way Alastor thought he could benefit from.
Mina decided it was best for now to sit with her theories as a test to see how well she could predict Alastor’s next moves. She surprised herself when she realized she still trusted him with her safety; because no matter what the intentions of his little deal with Vaggie were, it wouldn’t bring any harm to herself.  
As they came down the staircase into the lobby together, Alastor burst her little bubble.
“You know about the deal, don’t you?” he whispered.
Mina just smiled.
“I see your need for attention can still win out over your need for secrecy.”
He huffed. “I wasn’t keeping the deal a secret; I’m just surprised you haven’t asked me about it.”
“Hmm,” she shrugged, “I guess I didn’t find it that interesting.”
That clearly was a blow to his ego, and he sulked in silence the rest of the way into the lobby, choosing a solitary chair rather than being close to her.
Charlie arrived home and Vaggie pulled her to join them in front of the television set. The commercial began to air when an emergency broadcast cut it short.
Mina sat in shock as Katie Killjoy announced the coming arrival of the next extermination.
Just six months away? They were cutting the time between their slaughter in half?
The other residents were just as outraged as her.
Everyone except Charlie and Alastor.
Rather than continuing to watch the TV screen, Mina studied their faces and came to the sinking realization they both already knew about this.
She quickly worked out Charlie must have just found out at the meeting with the angels she had been at all day but Alastor?
How the fuck did he know?
38 notes · View notes
tsireyqs · 1 year
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⭑・゚゚⁀➷ main works!
dark content will be bolded.
moon song (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: “m'sweet girl, you’re so good to me.” his tongue swipes over the spot he bit and kisses up to her jaw. “let me take care of you."
afterglow (jake sully x f! reader x neytiri)
ఌ➴⋆: “you have to relax, honey,” neytiri says against y/n's neck. her hand ghosts over her hips and she pushes them lower. “he can take it. isn’t that right, ma’jake?”
dancing with our hands tied (stepdad! jake sully x reader)
ఌ➴⋆: “stupid girl, what did i say about being quiet? you’re gonna get us caught,” he hisses. his head tilts when your small hands wrap around his wrist, and he tsks.
state of grace (stepmom! neytiri x reader)
ఌ➴⋆: “y/n,” her light sing-song voice calls out, “open those pretty eyes for me, sweet girl. want you to watch as you make me cum.”
lover (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: “she looks at you like you hang the stars. and i think, a little part of me hoped, no. wishes that i take up as much space in your heart as you do mine.”
false god (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: “this is wrong, i know. yet my heart can’t help but yearn for you.”
gold rush (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: quick glances and brush of hands almost makes jake forget that you're promised to another.
→ ivy
→ willow
⭑・゚゚⁀➷ drabbles/hcs!
a helping hand (jake sully x f! reader x neytiri)
ఌ➴⋆: neytiri teaching reader how to go down on jake
delicate (jake sully x human! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: size kink with jake
devil's in the details (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: choking kink while going down on reader
this love (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: praise kink with jake
destroya (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: mating press with jake
carry me out (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: pegging jake
two slow dancers (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: slow sex & biting with jake
so it goes... (stepdad! jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: gentle sex with daddy jake
high infidelity (stepmom! neytiri x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: stepmom! neytiri finally having her way with you
sweet nothing (stepmom! neytiri x reader) ft. kells ♡
ఌ➴⋆: stepmom! neytiri reeling you in
burning red (mean! stepdad! joel miller x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: face fucking with joel
i know places (stepdad! quaritch x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: stepdad! quaritch slipping into bed with you
picture to burn (stepdad! jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: stepdad! jake keeping stashes of polaroid pictures of you
but it's better if you do (stepmom! neytiri x f! reader x stepdad! jake sully)
ఌ➴⋆: stepdad! jake sully finding stepmom! neytiri between your thighs
a pearl (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: jake fingerfucking you in his lap
where your heart beats (next to mine), (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: jake's heart beat reminds you that he's here to stay; fluff!
don't blame me (joel miller x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: dbf! joel punishing you after teasing him
misery business (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: edging jake
only angel (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: letting subby! jake know he's yours
when the sun goes down (jake sully x f! reader x neytiri)
ఌ➴⋆: babysitter! reader caught inbetween jake and neytiri
what i want (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: stomach bulge kink with jake
baby you're out (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: overstimulating jake
untouchable (ellie williams x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: cockwarming ellie's strap
turn (jake sully x f! reader)
ఌ➴⋆: dbf! jakey bakey thots
more dbf! jakey bakey thots!
ఌ➴⋆: jake taking his stress out on you
brat taming with ronal and tonowari
ఌ➴⋆: body worship with jake
✩ updated 04/26/23
797 notes · View notes
purplecritter · 1 year
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theories/thoughts/analysis about touchstarved after playing the demo a few times
Under the cut because it got long (I exceeded the post character limit...) Also spoilers btw. PS: All the links are to posts on the official social media accounts or their kickstarter, with the exception of the animated trailer screenshots that I got from here.
(Happy one month since demo dropped!)
Mhin
I'm starting with them because I play favorites.
Mhin's silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights the crying eye (guilt? pain? blood? Their pupils almost seem to glow red, I wonder if it's connected) and the beak (in a way that reminds me of the skull of a bird rather than a live one).
The red choice connected to them is about asking if they're a scientist: their precision is almost surgical, though when asked if they've studied anatomy or medicine their reply is “Not quite” so it must be something similar enough.
When Vere complains about their first encounter with Mhin, he mentions that their dagger (visible in their in-game art) is an antique. Perhaps they inherited it, maybe from a mentor? It’s a curious choice of weapon for a hunter: stilettos (it’s described as such in the demo) aren’t ineffective in battle (especially if wielded by a physically strong fighter, which they absolutely are), but they are favored by assassins because they’re easy to conceal, they strike precisely and deeply but without letting much blood leak from the needle-thin wound.
As far as design goes, the clasps on their hood looks like a mix between the quaternary celtic knot and the triquetra / trinity knot. Symbolically, the latter is associated to the Triple Goddess (more on this in Leander’s section) or three elements, while the former represents the four elements or the four seasons or the four cardinal directions, and is often used as a symbol of protection.
Their fatal flaw is that they “resist change at all costs”. I'm led to believe that they became a Monster instead of being born one. I think it either happened not that long ago or they lost control over it recently, and that's what spurred them on their search for a cure. Them being described as “outcast” also makes me think that they could have been exiled from wherever they came from, perhaps because the people found out that “a monster hides within their frame”.
When questioning them about Ais, they say “I'm not going to risk my life in the hopes that any of them is different” which shows that they’re distancing themself from their situation (i.e., being/becoming a Monster).
Their hate towards Monsters could be either a projection of the hate they feel towards themself (if they were aware that there was a Monster inside of them before they lost control and hurt someone, for example) or just because one took over them and by extension they hate every Monster because of it. If the “lost control and hurt someone” thing is true I'll also add that they might be working as a Hunter as a way to try and atone. It could also be a way to expel the more violent instincts (I’m assuming they have some) into something productive.
The “they're afraid of being hurt. Or worse” on their relationship chart with Kuras feels to me like they're afraid of hurting him, also because when you ask them how they get along with him during the demo, they say “Few people are willing to help others; fewer when there's any risk involved” and I'm choosing to interpret that they think of themself as the risk. I know I'm really pushing it on this aspect but the “If you stay too close to me, you'll get hurt”+“Find someone safer to ask for help” only fuels me more. Their monstrous form also looks less defined and more liquid compared to the others, maybe because it's not as developed so it doesn't look as solid?
Vere is also said to be often provoking Mhin in order to make them lose control: he's confident in himself enough to think that he'd have the upper hand in a fight with Monster!Mhin, probably because they're a skilled hunter but they don't have that much experience over their monstrous side. Mhin dislikes Vere because he’s “the embodiment of everything [they] hate about Monsters”: while Mhin holds back from their nature and seeks a cure, Vere wants to give in to his instincts without restraints.
In the demo, they get defensive when questioned about the Senobium, but when they say “Whatever you're looking for, the cost may be higher than what you're willing to pay” I think they're speaking from experience.
It's interesting that it's implied that they slept with Leander once. Judging by the comment about the Wet Wick being the “perfect combination for making mistakes”, they're not enthusiastic about it. I’m guessing that they don't like that Leander has seen them with their guard down? Or they
Unless I missed something, it's unknown where in Eridia they're staying. I'll say it's probably in a different direction from the Wet Wick since they make a point of saying that they're only going there to protect Kuras (instead of, for example, “I live nearby anyways so I'll take the same road”).
The flowers in their pin design look similar to cornus kousa, or some other type of dogwood, symbolizing hope, resilience, renewal (I also found: rebirth, new life, strength, regret). After a long and grueling winter, Eridia greets the first dogwood blossoms with relief. These flowers are known to cling tenaciously to life even in the worst conditions, from barren wastelands to ruins perpetually shrouded in Fogfall… Really poetic meaning! I imagine Mhin as the dogwood flower, persisting even after the Tragic Backstory that made them lonely (“barren wastelands”) and their Monster Form (“shrouded in fogfall”)
Leander
Leander's silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights only his eyes (they share the color of his magic -> maybe it's how he uses magic that contributes to him being “monstrous”?).
Nothing to note about his red choice except that it is unlocked by generally following his lead (taking the flower when he offers it, touching him without hesitation).
Speaking of his magic, an Alchemist MC notes that it extraordinarily powerful, enough that he doesn't need incantations or spell circles to cast it. Kuras mentioned that Leander prefers the company of those similar to him and that the Bloodhounds are mostly people who've endured the hardships of Lowtown, so I can't help but wonder if Leander was always a natural at magic, or if he did receive training but was later cast out, or maybe he left by choice?
A recurrent symbol in Leander's design is the triangle, as a detail mostly (on his coat, boots, dangling from his belt), but there's also one that looks like the alchemical symbol for earth (🜃) attached to the brooch on his chest; another symbol for earth is, you guessed it, the serpent, whose other meaning is duplicitous nature as well as renewal and rebirth. This connects to the ouroboros (present in his earring as well as in the background of the sticker and charm kickstarter rewards), symbolizing the cycle of death and rebirth and with relevance in alchemy as the “all in one”. The same theme is also present in the symbol of the triple moon (on his belt) symbolizing the stages of birth life and death and more in general three aspects united in one; the white lilies symbolizing renewal, regrowth, rebirth. The green feels fitting too, since it's often used to symbolize health and abundance.
Alongside the little triangle shape, attached to his belt there are a key (which is not the room key he gave MC), the head of which reminds me of two snakes knotted together; there's also a... I have no clue what that glowing red globe-spike is actually. It's the only other red item (along with the gem on the earring sword hilt) on Leander, but in some of the concept art it was green instead, so I think it's at least somewhat connected to his magic or the source of it. The shape of it combined with the red glow reminds me of Eridia’s towers’ architecture but that’s probably a stretch. I also feel like the symbol on the central part of the triple moon belt buckle is relevant: it immediately reminded me of a spell circle, and after doing some digging in sacred geometry, I’ve found that its 6 petal-like shapes (lilies also have 6 petals...) look similar to the hexafoil, “germ of life”, or the central part of the “seed of life”, which is connected to the divine creation of the world in 7 days/phases; a series of interconnected hexafoils make the “flower of life”, the meaning of which is creation (both in general and of the universe itself), and that everything’s interconnected to everything else... I couldn’t help but think of the “As above, so below” tagline in the Bloodhounds' poster; the sentence has so many interpretations in alchemy/esotericism but the gist of it is, “things in the higher realms of existence are just like in the lower/earthly plane” and “what happens in a large scale also happens in a small scale” and “common material things can make pure spiritual things”.
Overall, I'm thinking that all the green-glowing details on his outfit might be arcane foci, to help him cast magic without using incantations. As of right now, I’m willing to bet that Leander's connected to the Allmother (the traveler in the cart prayed to her) and/or the Abbess (the leader of the Senobium, I think): many of the aforementioned symbols also have ties to femininity and/or feminine qualities.
Other big things in his design are the eyebags and scar that goes from the cheek to the arm. I don’t have much to say on those, probably the scar is going to be connected to some important backstory event and the eyebags are a clue to suggest that there’s something troubling behind the bright and positive persona that he presents as.
If we want to take the name literally (I do), we could assume that Leander and his Bloodhounds are not simply a group of mercenaries, but mercenaries with a cause. Hounds are a breed specifically intended to track something specific (or someone specific) by scent. Given the animosity shown by them at the mere mention of the Senobium, it could have something to do with that, but perhaps it's also something more personal to Leander.
Let's get to the biggest red flag of the green-themed man: “Fatal flaw: [REDACTED]” and “Not all Monsters are inhuman”. There's also the fact that Vere doesn't trust his behaviour (I'll get to it in his section but I would generally trust Vere's words to be truthful). It’s also worth noting that in the first scene he makes an appearance in, he’s presented almost as a performer, a subtle-not-so-subtle hint that he can work his audience really skillfully. Overall, he seems too good to be true, and to quote Leander himself in the demo, “Things that seem too good to be true are often just that.” I don't think he's malevolent per se, but I also believe he's a very good liar (or at least, good at keeping his cards close to his pillowy bosom chest) and he can be a lot more ruthless than he lets on.
I already said it in Mhin's section but it's implied that the two of them slept together once, and I can't help but wonder if Leander also tried the whole "let me touch you so I can see what curses you but also you can tie me down if you want wink wink" tactic with them.
I get the feeling that he also slept with Ais? “He sure likes it when others take control”+“He's not so bad once you get to know him”. The bartender didn't joke about the room being used often huh (i’m saying this lighthearted and teasingly, nothing against it lol).
He's obviously staying at the Wet Wick with the rest of the Bloodhounds, and it happens often enough that the bartender/owner is familiar with their habits. I wonder if he also as a house of his own or not.
The flowers (in-game art, animated trailer, pin design, charm and sticker design) are white lilies, symbolizing devotion, sympathy and faith (I also found: renewal/rebirth/reregrowth and purity. Nothing says “I love you” as clearly as white lilies—ironic, since they’re some of the region’s most poisonous flowers. Some mages believe that these lilies contain a mysterious magic, but attempts to harness this power have only resulted in lethal poisonings. A not-so-veiled warning to be careful of what lies behind Leander’s charming facade... And considering that he seems to like when MC defers to him, I could imagine the (metaphorical... unless?) lethal poisoning in a possible bad end!
Kuras
Kuras' silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights the several eyes (truth and secrets being very important themes in his route, he's also described as “observer”) and his tears (his guilt).
No red choice for Kuras, but there is various flavour text depending on choices. First and most notably, the Unnamed MC notes that something about him feels familiar: this could simply be a hint about him being divine in nature, or it might mean something more, I'm still uncertain. Moreover, depending on dialogue, one of his scenes towards the end of the demo plays out slightly differently, and it shows the more playful side of him (which I absolutely didn’t expect, but I enjoyed that).
As far as appearance goes, his human form and his divine form have many similarities: this post does a very good job of showing them, but additionally I'll say that his halo (silhouette, charm and sticker design) reminds me of the shape of his earrings.
There are a few lines that imply that being in Kuras' vicinity feels physically warmer. It could be just a standard “MC likes him so being near makes them feel all warm and fuzzy” but I think it's more to do with his angelic nature having a comforting effect on people. Something that could be connected to that is the theme of fire (“eldritch flames”, also visible in the charm and sticker design), which symbolically is the element that purifies souls and reveals the truth.
His clinic seems very neat, for someone who works with numerous patients for the whole day. Moreover, his clothes stay unnaturally devoid of any sign of dirt. His appearance is also very curated, so I think that part of it is him being thorough about cleaning and part of it might be a consequence of his magic. Additionally, during the 16/04/23 Q&A stream with the devs (timestamp: 49:32), they (jokingly) said that Kuras doesn’t even put his hair up while performing surgeries, which to me also means that he doesn’t need to do it because he’s supernaturally clean and hygienic.
There's no clear mention of him having magic in the first place, but I don't think he could've completely reattached MC's arm so flawlessly any other way.
I wouldn't think much of it if it were any other character but Kuras' birthday being January 1st makes me think that he picked the date on purpose... or randomly, considering it doesn’t seem to be important to him.
During the 16/04/23 Q&A stream with the devs (timestamp: 41:24), it was noted that Kuras’ name was deliberately chosen, I think implying that it probably has a meaning behind it, though I can’t say what as of now (my search only revealed that kurash is a type of wrestling in Central Asia, and that there’s a deity called Kura in a region of Syria).
I think it's a known fact in Eridia that Kuras is not simply human (“Only the most desperate or the foolish would dare lay a hand on me”), so it's interesting that he chose to not disclose that to the MC. Granted, they've interacted for less than a day now and information is the currency. I also wonder if he’s always been a doctor or if he chose to become one at a certain point... I guess it would depend: is he “repentant” for something he did before settling in Eridia, or after?
Ais also thinks that Kuras used to be more outgoing but the reason he doesn’t really open up a lot to people anymore is because he “must’ve been burned”, which is an interesting insight. I lean more towards thinking that he’s been burned after becoming a resident in Eridia.
There's nothing that strikes me as peculiar regarding his relationships with the other characters,with two exceptions. Kuras' self-inflicted exile is centuries old, and combined with the fact that he (occasionally and begrudgingly?) works with the Senobium, it might be plenty of reason for Vere to hate him. I think that Kuras might've witnessed how he came to be captured (or actively took part in it), and that event is what feeds his mistrust towards Vere. Secondly, it’s said that he “looks forward to Ais helping around his clinic”: does Ais use the Seaspring’s healing powers on some patients (“I help him in the clinic sometimes”)? I wonder if the smokey scent when the MC wakes in Kuras’ clinic was because he’d been there recently.
He lives in one of the more populated areas, probably because 1) more easy for patients to reach him and 2) he likes meeting people.
The flowers in his pin design look like magnolias, symbolizing longevity, grace, divinity (I also found: eternity, perseverance, purity). The elegant magnolia’s therapeutic properties are vital in such a dangerous world. The Senobium cultivates a small magnolia grove, though few make it past the imposing gates to enjoy the rejuvenating blossoms… Of course the medicinal aspect reflects Kuras well. And there’s the connection to him being employed in some form by the Senobium too, the gates could definitely be a metaphor for how he keeps the true extent of his powers at bay
Ais
Ais' silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights his tattoo (Ocudeus' tentacles) and his eyes (the Groupmind's effect).
If MC’s been talking defiantly to him throughout the demo, the red choice connected to Ais also consists of rebelling to him, which he clearly enjoys (he’s said to dislike easy fights, so that’s probably it).
An Unnamed MC will note that Ocudeus’s presence/calling in the Seaspring feels familiar, and that his tattoo feels unnatural and it seems to move when they’re not looking... I’ll say that the tattoo isn’t a regular one, and might be the physical manifestation of the metaphorical mark that the bond with Ocudeus left on Ais. This also explains why in the silhouette of his monstrous form the tentacle tattoo is extended beyond what it normally looks like (it reaches his face, and over half of his chest).
The very prominent eye theme (charm and sticker design, Ocudeus possibly meaning “eye god” if it’s latin) and feeling of being watched (+“Got eyes in the back of my head”), plus the fact that the red-eyed woman knew what MC was seeking as well as their name, makes me believe that Ocudeus' area of influence is very extensive. As a consequence of the Groupmind, it's likely that apart from sharing thoughts (and identity?) those connected also share what they see to Ocudeus/Ais.
The notes left on the pillars are interesting. The topmost and middle one I feel are more useful to the player and serve as casual worldbuilding, but the bottommost one is the most curious imo: decoding the scrawling results in “never wish on a shooting star he's always listening”. Initially I thought that the “he” referred to Ocudeus, but it doesn't feel correct (Ocudeus always watches, it doesn't listen).
During the 16/04/23 Q&A stream with the devs (timestamp: 36:32), Ais was said to be the first character that they created, and the rest of the cast was built around him for cohesiveness. This is interesting to me, as from the demo I thought that “central” role would fit Leander more.
Speaking of Leander, both of them have a like/dislike relationship with each other (Leander because “the assassination attempts are funny, until they’re not” and Ais because he “won’t hesitate to put Leander in his place when the time comes”). Leander seems to be uncomfortable about the effects that the Seaspring has on people, while Ais talks about “a time where Leander's resolve will be tested, same for anyone in this plane or the next”... I wonder how soon that time is going to be 👀. I already noted this in Leander’s section but I think they also slept together at one point or another.
Same topic, different character: Vere. It’s cute that they’re so fond of each other [1, 2], and I’m very curious to know how they met. They probably bonded because of compatible personalities, but I also think that they like each other because they’re both dangerous, and being with someone who is also as dangerous feels... Fitting, safe, maybe?
The fact that he's “not as in control of his powers as he thought” is also interesting to me, since his nonchalance doesn't seem to be because he's lazy but because he's extremely confident. Perhaps he got too sure of himself and lost sight of the risks?
Ais is described as “renegade”, which by definition is someone who betrays a principle/alliance. I have no doubt that this is connected to the reason why he's a “gang leader without the gang members”, and probably to how he came to bond with Ocudeus. Because he's also said to dislike isolation, I lean more towards saying that he didn't willingly let his (former?) members go, my theory is either they left on their own (perhaps they were scared of Ocudeus, or they didn't approve of it) or he accidentally disposed of them (either because he wasn't in control of Ocudeus / the Soulless, or because Ocudeus felt hungry and they were conveniently nearby). Either way, it must have hurt him, since he's not at all willing to talk about it beyond “Gang took a walk”.
I’m very curious about Mhin saying “Monsters like [Ais] don't know or care about what they have”... What does (did?) Ais have? Could it be in reference to him letting his former gang/companions go away in favor of siding with Ocudeus and/or the Seaspring?
He lives at the Seaspring, though I wonder if he sleeps in a pile near those cushions, cuddling the Soulless, or if he has more personal quarters further in. There's a cave entrance visible on the other side of the bloody water, but that feels more for Ocudeus rather than Ais himself.
The flowers in his pin design are spider lilies, symbolizing mourning, goodbyes, lost memories (I also found: death, abandonment, new beginnings). Eerily beautiful, red spider lilies bear the sorrow of loss and farewells. Eridians believe these flowers shepherd lost spirits into the afterlife. The city has seen a sudden increase in these unearthly flowers, leaving many puzzled about their meaning… Very fitting with Ocudeus’ domain of losing memories and thus, beginning a new life! I’m not sure if we should be taking the increase in flowers literally, or just metaphorically as there’s many in the Groupmind
Vere
Vere's silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights the eyes again (“windows to the soul” and all that), his fangs (him being the most openly aggressive) and the collar and chains (the thing that binds him to the Senobium's will).
I haven’t been able to not get his red choice [edit: “hidden ending”, not a red choice], but from my understanding of what others have said it’s based on how you talk to him and not on your actions. I’d love to say more but since I don’t know exactly influences it, I don’t have much to talk about regarding that🥹
“Not quite human, not quite monster. Seems we’re both--” I wonder if he was about to finish the sentence with ‘cursed’?
 He has unique dialogue for each of MC’s backstories: to an Alchemist he says “The misery born of your mistreatment haunts you. I understand what it’s like to be used and thrown away. I’ll give your life new meaning”; to an Unnamed “You poor thing, misled by those you trusted most. You caused so much suffering unknowingly. I know that pain. I can help you forget it all”; to a Hound “The betrayal, the loss of hope, the sheer desperation that drives you still to search and search to no end. I could give you something new to live for”. Apart from showing that he knows stuff he’s not supposed to, I’m more interested about what he says to Alchemist and Hound: he knows the pain of causing suffering unknowingly, and he knows what it’s like to be used and then discarded. His powers seems to be seeing through people, I’d say almost mind-reading (“You can’t hide anything from me.”), but I think soul reading is a more fitting definition. I feel that all of the comments related to MC's backstory have more to do with what they experienced/felt than just objective facts, plus the way he says “All that suffering has made your soul so irresistibile...”, it makes me think that he's reading MC’S present and past emotions through their soul.
The most apparent part of his design is that he’s half showing, half hiding. His outfit makes the harness very visible, yet he hid the leash from the MC for as long as possible, and he didn't let them close enough to touch it. His pants are fully cover one side and show skin on the other. The sheer fabrics look very cool on their own but I like to think they're also part of the "half show, half hide" thing he has going on. An Alchemist MC will note that the collar seems to be enchanted, while other backstories will simply say that the lock seems easy enough to open.
In the charms and stickers design, there's his chain in the background, and it's broken. Metaphorically and literally, “breaking free from the chains” symbolizes putting an end to what holds someone captive, but also finding freedom to be oneself. Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, but I think a freed Vere would also feel free to not hide so much of himself. On that note, I'm extremely curious about what he draws on his sketchbook. Also in the charm and stickers design, as well as in the Nintendo Switch port art, is the key that he stole from the MC. It's curious that they included it instead of a more personal object like his sketchbook (present in the Switch port art but not in the stickers), but it might just be a fun nod to the demo or maybe he'll develop a habit of stealing the key again in the full game, so I don't think I should read too much into that.
Neither Vere or Kuras of them gives too many juicy details about their mutual hate towards each other during the demo, but from the additional info [1, 2] published on Tumblr, I think it might have to do with the fact that both of them have been confined in Eridia for centuries, and perhaps Kuras even contributed to the capture of Vere, too.
He’s defined as a “charlatan”, which by definition means “someone who decieves through false claims”. It fits with him saying “If I were you, I wouldn’t trust a word I say” and “Information is a luxury [...] If you valued my words you'd have taken them seriously”. This feels like a recurring theme for Vere: Ais also says, “Vere is one of the most honest people you'll meet. Just don't listen to a single thing he says”. Despite the very obvious predatory/mischievous nature of Vere, I think that he is very honest about the things he says: it’s about reading between the lines.
His very evident distaste towards Leander might be connected to this, seeing that Leander seems to be hiding a lot.
Vere clearly likes Ais, but as soon as MC asks more, he warns them about how dangerous he and the Seaspring are. I think both are true: Ais being “a good person” doesn’t exclude the fact that he is dangerous.
It could be a stretch, but I wonder if Vere lives/stays in the building that he was chained to?
The flowers in his pin design look like some type of lilies, perhaps wood lily are a type of amaryllis that symbolizes passion, allure, pride ( when researching the wood lilies, I also found: danger, determination). Local legends conflict on the origins of the amaryllis. Whether they sprang from the spilt blood of a scorned lover or were born of an ancient Senobian ritual gone awry, the truth behind these flowers is knowledge long forgotten… or held by a privileged few. Like Kuras, his flower mirrors the connection to the Senobium though it remains vague about how exactly they became involved... In the greek myth, Amaryllis consulted an oracle to win the love of the shepherd Alteo: she walked to his house every day, piercing her heart with a golden arrow, and on the 30th day flowers bloomed from her blood. Alteo became enamoured with the maiden and the flowers that bore her name... I wonder how Touchstarved’s version of the myth is different than ours, and which character Vere is more akin to?
Nothing on Sen or Elyon for now since there's too little info on both, but I'm looking forward to putting them under a microscope too 👀
(bangs pots and pans) please share your theories/thoughts if you read this far? 👉👈
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nubimera · 8 months
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Soo.... about that post you said you'd make with all your favorite Miguel O'hara bots....
CALL ME ABBA CAUSE GIMME GIMME GIMME!!!!!
The Abba quote destroyed me and i love it, thank you 💀😭
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🕷️- Miguel is your soulmate, but you are not his (Angst) (Actually my favorite bot in the list. I have never cried so much. In my role Miguel married his girlfriend, and User married Gabriel, but user and Mig always been in love with each other. It was terrible and I recommend it to everyone)
🕷️- Soulmate Au, but this time it's nice
🕷️- User's variant died during Miguel's canonical event. Now he's a little shocked to see User alive and well
🕷️- Mamma mia Au. Gabriella has invited a former flame of yours to her Quinceañera
🕷️- Silk Au. User and Miguel were bitten by the same spider (Technically nsfw, but can also be fluff)
🕷️- Black Cat User
🕷️- Miguel is pissed because User sucks at being a Spider-person (he's actually worried about safety but can't express himself in a normal way)
🕷️- FEM MIGUEL MY BELOVED (She Is so gnam)
🕷️- User is a soccer parent of a child in Gabriella's rival team
🕷️- User is a multidimensional variant of Gabriella's mother
🕷️- The user has never told Miguel that they have a child (the drama)
🕷️- Selkie Au
🕷️- User has ADHD (@ asher04 has tons of bots, so I recommend looking at their list or tiktok)
🕷️- Addams family Au (@ofherdesire is another creator with a lot of bots, and if I'm not mistaken she accepts requests on tiktok, i think?)
🕷️- User is Miguel's personal assistant
🕷️- User is babysitting their niece, when they meets single dad!Miguel at the park
🕷️- Hanahaki Au (@gyufairyz has a sizable bot list and accepts requests)
🕷️- Regency Au bc i'm a big fan of Pride and Prejudice
🕷️- User is FtM/Masc-trans, and his father Miguel is helping him transition
🕷️- Miguel is a multidimensional variant of User's father
🕷️- T4T Miguel and User (chef kiss)
🕷️- Strawberry Miguel bc he's cute lol
Actually my favorite O'Hara brother is Gabriel so I also put my favorite bot with him: ☀️
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m-an-u · 8 months
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This would have a lot more reach on the other blog but anyways on the topic of "sportswashing" someone brought up that they would like for the kazakhstan gp to not get replaced by hungary because of their horrible policies against lgbt+ people. And how they would like for fans at every race to "call out" the bad things being done in that place and all which, while a very noble thought, is simply unrealistic.
Just as an example at the indian gp the trophy was handed out by the chief guest....the chief minister of the state in which the race was held. The man who gave bezz the trophy is someone who is responsible for the deaths of many muslim people (and non upper caste hindus in general). He makes regular calls for genocide. Everyone in the stands was cheering for this man when he was announced btw.
The entire event too was a political show of power. The trophy was a map of 'india'. The name of the event was the "Bharat GP" not the Indian GP. No one talked about any of this not a single journalist I know of. My point isn't that we should ignore these things but that it's a pipe dream to expect people to boycott a race because of a country's human rights policies. We would have no races at that point.
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claitea · 2 years
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art comms updated :D adjusted prices, highest price has gone from 30 to 20. go check em out please!
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voidhope · 10 months
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The Other Woman
(Part 2 FINALE)
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Synopsis: Miguel had left Y/N for another version of his old wife in hopes of getting his old life back. To only realize the mistakes he’s made.
Link to Part 1
Pair: Miguel O’Hara x Spider!reader
Warnings: very heavy mental health, ANGST LIKE A LOT OF ANGST, ALL OF THIS IS ANGST, mentions of death/almost dying, long term establish relationship, cheating, swearing, therapy, physical fight, blood, feral protective miguel?
A/N: hello again! this one is more heartbreaking and longer than the first part oof… Very low dialog up until closer towards the end! wanted to just get through telling the story itself and the emotions. It’s just a very heavy storyline!! I want to say thank you so so much for showing so much support for part 1 i had no idea it would receive that much attention :O !! i wrote this out kinda fast as i didn’t want to loose the momentum of the idea. so apologies for any mistakes! all feedback is greatly appreciated ~
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You used to make Miguel coffee everyday, with one cream two sugars, and he would nag about how he hated the taste. It was to your liking, not his. As you would sneakily take sips out of his mug while working next to him. Why didn’t you just get your own coffee? You claimed you could never finish it and just wanted a taste out of his. Miguel would roll his eyes at you every time he caught you but he adored it. He had secretly grown to love the way you made it and had become his only way of making coffee after meeting you.
Now as this version of his older wife made it the way he is suppose to like coffee, bland and straight, he found himself bothered by it. Going as far to correct her even though this was what he had been claiming to have missed so much. He was now seeing himself teaching someone else how to love him like you did…
He was only a shell of the man he was when he had Gabriella. Even though the copy of his old wife has her same personality, the relationship couldn’t be exactly how it was before because he had changed so much. You had helped him become whole again. His tastes and likings had all switched to everything about you. The charm he found in his old wife doesn’t hold a light to you now and he was getting frustrated. He had wanted this so badly. He felt like those babies who whine and cry wanting to eat a lemon and once they get their way they realize the sour truth.
Miguel never truly realized what it was like to loose you until three weeks after he told you the truth. Over the years the idea of losing you terrified him but he only ever thought of it being in death. He never considered separation when everything was perfect for both of you then. There were times he believed that you were made just for him and he treated you like his queen. Which you truly were to him in his spider society. Why would he ever throw that away? Look at what he did.
He gave himself every excuse in the book before you knew he was cheating on you. ‘This is only for research.’ he would think every time he found himself back in that universe. As everyone knew he was so serious about his work, obviously this is just him getting to know more about certain universes and canons. Lyla was the only one seeing straight through him knowing where he was actually going. Things kept tumbling and the more he found out about the place and spent time with her the more his grief and yearning returned. It was all just there, so reachable.
There was a time his mind tried to snap him back out of it while cheating on you and made him realize the guilt. The first time he kissed this woman you were there in his mind. He came home right after and held you without saying a word. You never questioned him, just showed him comfort as much as you could. Lightly stroking his back, you never over stepped or pushed him when he was vulnerable with you. He only closed his eyes and held onto you tighter processing how you were always too good for him. He was converting to living two different lives; his old self during the day and then coming home to you. He didn’t want to let go of either at the time.
Once he found out he could safely have Gabriella again was when he became distant with you. The shame of using you for research made him become stoic. He didn’t want to admit how wrong he was treating you. All while you were always being so loyal and trusting towards him. Things were slowly slipping through the cracks and he knew he couldn’t up keep it. He wished he could have had that conversation with you so much differently but it was over. Now he had his old life back, a dream he had his mind set on.
He ignored the shakiness in his hands when he returned to her after letting you go. ‘It’s all for the best.’ is what he would repeat in his mind as a mantra. His new girlfriend truly had no idea who he really was or what his background was. Miguel continued to feed her lies to the point where he even started believing them himself getting too lost in avoiding what he’s done. He believed he was happy as he spent time with her.
When she got too close to finding the truth after finding his wedding ring in one of his pockets, he set her off course from it by revealing his spider identity and taking her to HQ. This was the day that everything felt like it was crashing around him. Being reminded of his marriage, having to face his friends with his new lover, sharing his personal spider life, his work with someone who wasn’t you. He excused himself rushing to an unused office room while his chest was tightening. Pupils dilating as he realized it was his first time having a panic attack.
Nevertheless he continued to push it all aside and act completely normal with his girlfriend. He was feeling your absence the most while working. You had became an extension of him. He had trained you from scratch and you helped him build this society he has now. You knew the ins and outs of everything and fought perfectly alongside him. Now that he was on his own he let his girlfriend be there for him when he got stressed, but there always was a knot in his stomach he never could get rid of.
The more his mental health ate at him late at night the more he considered searching out for you. There was no closure between both of you and he never got to listen to how you feel. What was your opinion on all that happened? Do you hate him?
He wanted to speak with someone so badly but he dug himself in a hole too deep. You were gone, he was lying through his teeth to this poor woman he’s kept for some fantasy, he felt too ashamed to say anything to his friends, he would rather die if all his workers found out how big of a piece of shit he is. Anytime Lyla tried peeping a word that wasn’t work related he would snap. He had pushed everyone away and now he just felt alone.
Regardless he would wake up in the morning and swallow all his dark feelings. He would remember his grief of when he lost his family and it would put him back in the moment. He has another chance. He was happy with the direction he was going in now.
Right?
The day he found out you were at HQ he felt his heart stop. He was mid mission trying to call for Lyla but she wouldn’t answer. Frustrated he tried looking into what was happening only to see her busy having a conversation with you. It felt like something took over him when he opened a portal in less than a second. Without thinking nor wasting a heartbeat he rushed back. Just a glimpse of you, maybe just to hear a word out of your mouth. The feeling of having you back in HQ was making him ignore all his insecurities. How he would coward at the thought of trying to reach out to you before. You were in his home, your home, and the thought drove him wild.
You were already long gone though. Lyla stared at him not saying a word. The quietness in the room making his ears ring but his thoughts were screaming in his head. He stood there frozen still trying to recollect himself. He was the one that left you, what is wrong with him?
Again he went back and forth in his own head trying to convince himself ‘You wanted this.’ but if he did why is he feeling like someone just killed a puppy in front of him? Why is he here fighting with his self if this is really his dream? Why did he try chasing after you? The wounds of his past grief were too deep. He never took the time to properly heal and now look at what he’s become.
“Miguel, what’s this?” He was startled turning around seeing his girlfriend holidng your watch and skimming through the divorce paperwork addressed to him.
There was no more hiding, no more lying. He swallowed hard even though his throat was dry. He let everything he had kept away rise to surface. It hurt him to see the beautiful face his old wife shared contort into such anger and pain while finding the truth.
She didn’t stay, but for some reason he wasn’t upset. Though he longed for his daughter, he knew it would have never been the same now. He finally closed the door on his past. His heart had made the choice this time but it’s too late. Now grasping onto the divorce papers left by you, emptiness spread through his soul.
You on the other hand did not find yourself crying by yourself on a rooftop for long. The shift in the air from your arrival alerted the local spider-man immediately.
“It didn’t work out, did it?” He crouched down next to you as he noticed your watch gone and your missing wedding band.
Peter Parker knew both you and Miguel. Your husband had come to do many rounds of research in this universe when he took you. Eventually offering this Peter a spot in the society, which he politely declined due to just being busy enough here. You both never spoke much but always had an appreciation for each other.
“Do you need a place to crash at?” He continued while trying to get you to look at him. Reaching his hand towards you.
You had absolutely no one and you had been gone so long you couldn’t even go back to the little you had. When you met Miguel you didn’t hesitate to never look back and now it filled you with regret. How naive were you to put all your trust and reliance on him.
You took Peter’s hand. You were ready to start your own life and be your own person now.
Peter Parker was nice enough to let you stay with him as long as you needed it. You both had became ‘besties!’ as he would love to poke at you. The first month with him you were a disaster really but he showed you how he liked to cope using his spider abilities.
The first thing he helped you with was getting a new suit. Your old one resembled too much to Miguel’s and you felt suffocated every time you put it on. Peter had taught you to use your current emotional pain on whichever sad little villain was making trouble out in Brooklyn that night.
“Come on, we got multiverse spider-woman helping me keep these streets clean now!” He would taunt at the men while watching you easily take them out a little bit too aggressively. His feet kicking up and down while he sat on the side of a building watching you. The crime rate did go down a bit once word got around how strong your punch was. Peter’s just happy he can now spend some nights to himself.
You got yourself a job at the mart on the corner to help cover bills for Peter and save up. You were grateful enough the owners never batted an eye when you would disappear during a shift to either suddenly go cry uncontrollably or beat the shit out of someone at a nearby robbery. Next thing you were enrolling yourself back in university, wanting to finish that degree you never did.
It wasn’t too long that some of your older spider friends would stop by to check in on you. Seeing them was difficult sometimes, you were internally itching to ask about Miguel. Things were going okay for you on a very slow path of breathing step by step. You never wanted to feel that hurt again and so you very well pretend like Miguel didn’t exist if you could.
You couldn’t ignore the hurt resurfacing when you passed couples on the street. Or when you found yourself going to fidget with your wedding ring just to remember it’s gone. You can’t just move on from a relationship that was so deeply apart of you and lasted so long. You gave everything to him and it will take you much time to get yourself to build trust again.
After two semesters, you finally had your graduation. All the things you learned while in Earth-928 paid off as you barley had to study. Passing top of the class, you immediately got an offer for an internship opportunity with Alchemax and was able to get an introduction tour of the building beforehand.
What you hadn’t realized was that Alchemax had been looking for that girl who snuck into their offices a couple years ago. Who made another dimension’s spider appear and then went missing herself soon after. They had kept as close tabs on you as they could and how foolish you were to think your little break in wouldn’t come back to bite you. The moment you stepped foot back in their building, it was over for you.
Miguel had spent a whole year in much deserving therapy. Nothing could stop the embarrassment he felt when Peter B signed him up with HQ’s best spider-therapist after 3 months of constant out bursts. No one could come near the man when he felt like he had lost everything. Those first initial months were difficult for everyone around him.
Therapy did help, he hates to admit it, but it was a very rough ride. He finally was able to understand his deep inner term oil and heal his issues but moving on from you? No, he could never.
You were the only one who had sincerely stood by his side, always rooting for him. He never fell out of love with you despite of everything that he did. He just pushed everything down too deep and was blinded by obsession. Till now he could never deny that he still loves you. Maybe if he just would have went to therapy years ago instead of acting out on unsolved grief none of this would have happened. The guilt always making him toss and turn at night.
He would have big temper tantrums when he would find his coworkers going to visit you time to time and not sharing any details. He needed to know if you’re okay. Did you already move on? He longed to find you and speak with you but he knew he wasn’t ready yet. He was so self destructive and this was what he deserved.
Everyone avoided him completely when he overheard someone saying you were living with Peter Parker. Fighting crime with him and having a cute little home life. Peter followed you around now like a puppy. Miguel did not take the news well at all. Let’s just say, the large bill replacement for his monitor screens was what snapped him out of that rage.
He also wanted to strangle Hobie Brown every time he saw a glint in his eye when your name was mentioned around. Yet Miguel couldn’t hate the kid either, as Hobie was one of the people to try help repair the damage he did to you. How badly he just wanted to hold you and shield you in his arms from any other people taking you from him as if he wasn’t the idiot to let you go in the first place.
Everyone’s big, powerful, scary boss was really just a grumpy, wallowing-in-self-pity, sensitive, lonely man now. Mention your name too much to him and watch him start crying or take it out on whatever he could find nearest to him. He would some nights scroll through your wedding photos while listening to your last tracked log with Lyla. Your words cutting through him deep like long sharp knives. How he urged to go tell you it was all wrong and how guilty he was for making you feel like this.
Despite it all, he still believed in being the best of the best. He used his work to distract himself from his sorrows, to become numb. Even though his divorce paperwork were set next to him on his desk to remind him the pain. He never signed it.
“We can’t tell him!” Jessica gritted through her teeth. Small group of spider-people were hovered around Lyla taking in the new found information.
“Her canon events have always been uncertain, we can’t just stop and fix this one?” Gwen Stacy suggested in hopes.
“We have never prevented a canon event of hers or the people involved in it. It could be even more dangerous than a regular canon.” Peter B spoke grimly.
“When ‘as danger ever stopped us?” Hobie spoke up.
“Everyone get your gear.” Lyla added to the stress of the situation.
You couldn’t open your eyes properly with a strong blinding light being held above you. Arms and legs secured on top of a metal surgical table. You could feel the warmth of blood scattered on certain parts of your body, slowly starting to dry. It was a mix of yours and the people you had tried fighting through to get out of here when you realize the trap you were reeled into. Different people in lab coats poked and pried all around you while you were tied. Your mask was thrown on another table and your suit had large gashes across it.
Soon you also could feel the presence of Peter Parker being brought to the room, thrown slumped in the corner breathing heavily. They had gotten you too good. They knew everything and had planned this so detailed.
“Now you’re going to help me open the multiverse.” Kingpin loomed around you. All you could feel was searing pain as a laser aimed right at your chest.
Miguel was already staring out the window to the glowing night lights of Nueva York when he saw a big hole appear in sight of the skyline. His eyebrows furrowed while he was trying to process what he was looking at. It wasn’t a second later when all alarms started going off in his office.
“Qué carajos?” He exclaimed seeing the alerts of a possible universe collapse. “Lyla! Why wasn’t this being taken care of already?”
“I already sent people.”
“Then what are they doing?” He yelled. His confusion and anger only furthered when he saw a red alarm for a canon event.
“Canon event?” He whispered to himself. He always knew when these were happening, there were none scheduled for today. There was no way he would let one passed him, it’s not like this could magically appear? His jaw dropped in realization… a new canon event.
“Lyla, tell me the truth. Why wasn’t this reported to me?” He made the atmosphere turn cold. She knew he already figured it out.
“A new canon event was received this morning being given to Peter Parker. Of Y/N L/N’s death.” The words from Lyla made Miguel’s body go still. His eyes raced side to side while he processed it.
“No!” He roared, a fist slamming into the nearby desk. His massive strength breaking it in half.
“Boss, you can’t go on this mission only using your emotions.” Lyla warned. However Miguel was already half way stepping through a portal to find you.
He appeared, watching his team struggle to shut down the machine causing the collapse. Outnumbered by the amount of Alchemax puppets. A different kind of rage filled him as he saw you, for the first time in a year, suffering. Miguel was never one to act reckless while on missions but he had no plan here and just ran off the pure adrenaline the fight or flight had hit him with.
His claws tore into the backs of his enemies as he jumped beast-like across the room. Not hesitating spilling blood across the wall while he took everyone down as fast as he could. His team could only watch wide eye with an unsettling fear as they saw Miguel lose himself to his spider sense. While he fought they took the opportunity to take apart the machine.
Miguel was panting heavily, pupils blown wide glowing red, and fangs dripping with venom as the room slowly silenced. Kingpin laid on the floor slowly trying to drag himself after being beaten to a pulp. It was over. Peter B stopped him from doing anything further. Knowing Miguel would kill the man, Peter B let the team finish up to give Kingpin to authorities. Miguel turned frantically to look at you seeing the other spiders step away. Peter Parker was hunched over you in tears. Miguel fought the urge to snap at Peter and grab his hands off of you.
Your vision was too blurry and everything felt like it was burning. A shape that seemed too familiar came into your peripheral vision and you tried to push yourself up.
“Miguel?” Was the last thing you croaked before slumping back passing out. Miguel catching you in his arms before you could hurt yourself further.
“It’s her time.” Jessica spoke behind him. Yet he was refusing to let go. He had never defied the way the timeline worked since he created his society. He would never break the rules and you both had promised each other before not to. If there was a situation like this you both agreed to save the universe first. How stupid was he to think he would listen to that now facing it in-front of him.
He never got to tell you what happened. He never got to apologize. He never got to tell you one more time that he loved you. Even if you in result just spat in his face, at least he was able to talk to you one more time. You were never a placeholder or someone to fill a hole in his heart. His whole heart belonged to you and he couldn’t let you go thinking you didn’t mean anything to him. No matter the consequences, he needed to tell you.
“Call all the teams to control the damage of a possible universe collapse.” He turned to Jess with Y/N tightly in his arms. The spider-people watched speechless as he opened a portal and disappeared.
Two weeks you laid motionless in the HQ’s medbay.
The clean up after breaking the canon was a little intense. They were able to get it under control as the event started to fade from your timeline once you were returned and starting to heal in Earth-928.
The spider society would remain silent near the medbay. The lights always being dimmed and hushed whispers between staff to not bother the distressed O’Hara. He refused to leave.
Your Peter Parker had now joined the team, much to Miguel’s dismay. Everyday your friends would come in and check to see how you were. Some telling stories about their day or any gossip updates you missed, in hopes that it would get you to wake up. They would ignore the gloomy Miguel who was basically glued to the seat next to you not saying a word to anyone.
At night Miguel would play with your fingers and softly stroke your hair all while pleading “Please don’t leave me, please don’t leave me. Por favor mi alma.” He knew it wasn’t his place to beg this after what he did, but he didn’t mind the words falling on deaf ears.
Miguel hadn’t eaten in days, he felt too nauseous from anxiety to even try anything. Pavitr had done the favor to bring you and Miguel’s favorite empanadas from a small street vendor downtown. Hoping to get Miguel to at least try the food before he ended up in a hospital bed next to you due to starvation.
You started to blink open your eyes, spots surrounding your vision. You could hear a soft breathing to your right side and you slowly felt your sense come back one by one. It felt like you just had a really rough nap.
“Oh my god that smells so good.” You moaned, sitting yourself up to try to look at where the smell of food was coming from.
You were met with a wide eyed Miguel holding a box of empanadas. His jaw slacked open acting as if he’s seen a ghost looking at you. Confusion hit you first for a second and then you start to panic.
Why was he here? Why was your ex-husband sitting right here? You started to push away from him and Miguel caught on to your panic.
“No, no, no mi amor stop.” He tried calming you. “You’re hurt, you’re going to open your stitches.”
You suddenly remembered everything that happened right before you blacked out. At that moment you forgot the hurt you had towards your ex-lover. Gathering yourself you just stared at him. “I’m suppose to be dead.”
Tears rimmed your eyes. Why did it feel like life just hated you so much?
Miguel engulfed you in his arms as you started to cry. You didn’t care right now. You had ached for this feeling again, so alone, with the comfort Miguel used to bring you. Just for a moment you could pretend like how it was before.
“We can’t do this Miguel.”
He knew what you were thinking. He didn’t want to let you leave his arms yet, as he let his self hold harder and push your head closer into his the crook of his shoulder. The tickle of your breath on his neck, he just wanted this forever.
“She left. Almost a year ago.” He let out to you. A big weight coming off of his chest. You pulled back from him and looked up into his eyes while you watched him avoid your gaze. You felt bad to say you could feel a bit of satisfaction bubbling in you.
“Good, she deserved better.”
“So did you.” Miguel sighed playing with his hands. Your eyes widened when you saw the ring still on his finger. He let you stare. “I-I could never. I couldn’t.” The emotions struggle to come out of his mouth. You understood him though. You always did. Placing your hand on top of his you just nodded.
“Please stay here.” He whispered.
Miguel had broken you in so many ways. Yet he almost ruined another universe just to keep you alive. You both needed time to talk and coming out a coma right now isn’t good timing.
“I finally became my own person when I went back in my universe. I enjoyed my independence.” The words pelleted at him. He could only hold his breath as he waited for you to continue. “I’ll stay… but not for you.”
It wounded him deeply; but he deserved it. This place will always be a home for you even if he wasn’t apart of it. Before he can tear his gaze and turn away, you reached out to hold his face close to yours. Your fingers gently rubbing on his cheeks as you slowly look at him properly after so long. You let your thumb smooth over his frown lines and he leaned into your touch closing his eyes.
“Let’s give us time.” Was the words you blessed that opened every door of hope he could find. He would take it, he would absolutely take it. He has to fight for you, he has to prove to you. He would do anything but for now he’ll be on his best patiently waiting for you.
Both of you sat comfortably without speaking, only the faint background beeps of the hospital monitor making up for the silence, while passing small glances. For once both of you felt a missing warmth you didn’t realize you needed. Sharing empanadas with each other, just maybe it will be alright…
—————————————————
The end!!! Thank you so so much for your time in reading my story. i really really was so happy with all the comments and feedback on pt 1 it really meant a lot!!!
i hope this was ok ~ i apologize for how long it was i was thinking of doing another part but just wanted to finish this up. I was in such a conflict how to end this. i hope it wasn’t too cliche or anything i’m just a sucker for very wanty needy dramatic stories. It’s a hopeful ending tho~ i couldn’t pick with just happy or sad.
So many of you had tons of amazing suggestions which I appreciated so much. I was such a mess trying to figure it all out. Many of you wanted to see Y/N move on with another person but I ended up going this route. I used Peter Parker as an obv character in y/n’s universe but it’s not tied to any specific one and you guy can think of him more to your liking if you want to!
If any of you would like a small drabble or imagine of another route of this story or just anything angsty/possessive and rarwrarwbarkbark miguel. I’d be glad to help lol!! My request box is wide open~ i had so much fun writing this!
TAG LIST!
@hoseokslefteyebrow @sleepyamaya @typicalife-101 @jenniferdixon05207 @geraskier-thots @nuttyrebelflower @youcantseem3 @ihateuguys @archangel1206 @southprw
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tiredguyswag · 3 months
Text
one of those masterposts for Sudan 🇸🇩
Disclaimer: I am not Sudanese, and am in no way an expert on the ongoing crisis. Corrections, if any, are welcome.
LAST UPDATED: 26th April 2024 [Please try to reblog the original post as much as possible]
~
So what's going on in Sudan? Sudan was under the rule of the military dictator Omar Al-Bashir for thirty years. He came to power through a military coup in June 1989. His rule saw extreme economic decline, repression, and conflict. In the December of 2018, a democratic revolution began that eventually overthrew the dictatorship on April 11, 2019, and saw the beginning of a military rule by militant parties SAF (Sudanese Armed Forces) and RSF (Rapid Support Forces). This unrest is, of course, funded by western governments.
On the 15th of April, 2023, fighting broke out in Khartoum between the SAF and RSF. Clashes spread across the nation of Sudan, and the civilian populace is still caught in the middle. According to UN officials, Sudan is in “one of the worst humanitarian nightmares in recent history."
There is an ongoing war in Sudan, and it's getting worse. There is a health crisis along with the humanitarian crisis as well: around 2/3rds of the population do not have access to healthcare services. Around 15-20 millions suffer from hunger. There are 70 non-operational healthcare facilities in conflict zones. Thousands killed, millions displaced, and a dramatic increase in sexual violence and rape cases.
~
Links for Learning Resources:
Hadhreen: Hadhreen started as an initiative by a small group of Sudanese youth in 2015. Since its inception it continued to work in a variety of sectors, most notably Emergency response, health, and in supporting vulnerable groups.
Talk About Sudan: Learn more about what's happening in Sudan and actions you can take. Also has donation links for those who are able.
Keep Eyes On Sudan: A website run by Sudanese diaspora to amplify the calls of the Sudanese people. Has donation links, actions you can take, upcoming protests and events, resources, FAQs, etc.
#SudanSyllabus.docx: An extensive and well-sourced document, providing English language resources about Sudanese history. It's really long and has got lots of links to books, articles, and more. Curated by Razan Idris.
Human Rights Watch
~
Donation Links:
List of verified charities providing humanitiarian assistance in Sudan
Help Sudan Tarada Initiative: The aim is to deliver emergency basic needs, food and medicine. Funds will be transferred directly to local charities and organization who are managing those shelters to make sure that the funds are well received and is spent on the needs specified.
One Million Sustainable Pads Campaign: Fundraiser to help provide women in IDPs camps with reusable pads
Zubeyda Adam and family (Sudan)
Our home bombarded and destroyed
Help my family escape Sudan's war
Save a transperson in african Refugee camp from starvation [Unsure about the legibility of this one since its not from the person themself, but if someone can verify this for me that would be great]
Hope For Sudan
Darfur Women Action
Doctors Without Borders
Fill A Heart: Financial Assistance to Sudanese Hospitals
Hometax: Sudan Relief
Cairo Sudan Aid
Amal For Women
Sudan Solidarity Collective
Sadagaat
UNICEF
~
These are all the links I have so far. Please spread awareness about Sudan! Let me know if there are any links I should add to the post and I will update it.
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ahdriking · 1 year
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Get to know your fic writer!
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queers-gambit · 5 months
Text
Opening Night and Open Hearts
prompt: opening night - a mother's fear, a locked walk-in freezer, confessions through a thick metal door, questioning what's deserved, and a proposal at The Bear after hours.
pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader
fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear
word count: 9.8k+
note: i think i give enough background for you guys to feel as if you don't need to read any other relating works, but i linked the fics that could be read as a small series (maybe?) also let author be lonely in peace
warnings: reader nicknamed Peach, established relationship, cursing, spoilers, fluff, angst, relationship angst, hurt and comfort, Carmy still (desperately) needs a nap, depiction of physical illness, boys are dumb and emotions are hard, reader-insert, depiction of toxic family, OC Carmy that grovels a lot, not edited!
⚠️ season two, episode ten spoilers
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not necessary to read, but other relating works with Peach:
Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant
God's Plan part two: Two to Tango
Neon Sticky Notes
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"Hi, yes, I can hear you - sorry about that, I was just making note of your reservation," you spoke smoothly into the phone, trying not to ogle your boyfriend wrapped in only a clean blue towel. "So, that's a party of four for Monsieur Claude Badeaux - all right, that's so lovely. I'm obligated to remind everyone that tonight's opening is a fine dining experience and the proper, corresponding dress code is being asked for. Are there any allergies I should make note of for your party?"
"Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy," you were told.
"All right, that's noted and highlighted: Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy. If there's anything else I could help you with?"
"Non," he chuckled. "I was surprised to see your invitation to this evening, though, mon cher. It's been so long, yes?"
"Well, it was my pleasure to extend the offer, we're ecstatic by your reservation," you chuckled. "We'll see you tonight, Monsieur, and should you need anything before then, you may call this number again."
You said your parting words in French, smiling at Carmy when you hung up and dropped your work phone. "Did I hear that correct?" Your lover asked with a broad grin, "Was that...?"
"Senior marketing advisor at The Washington Post?" You filled in for him. "Uh, yeah, I think it was, but you know me - I could be wrong."
"You invited someone from The Washington Post to the opening tonight?"
"Is that okay?" You asked, standing from the bed after making note in your datebook. "You look kinda - I don't know, shocked?"
"I-I am," he blinked at you, watching you gather his pristine clothing to hang on the closet door. "But in a good way - I can't believe you did this," he chuckled, wiping his mouth. "I mean - holy shit, Peaches."
You offered a toothy grin, "Figured I could pull a few of my own strings to help get the word out about your love-child."
This made Carmy snicker, "Hey, now. Tonight's important, don't make fun."
"I know," you nodded, leading him back into the bathroom to view your hair products. "Which is why I invited some important people and some not-so important people. I know this is serious, Carmy," you smiled at him, hoping to convey your support, "and I wanted to help in whatever way I could."
"You being there tonight is more than I could ask for," he chuckled, helping you onto the small bathroom counter. You squirted a bit of hair product in your hand, watching him flinch back a little, "Uh, I just don't want my hair greasy, Peach, you know? Not a good look and I'll sweat it out in the kitchen."
"I feel like I should be offended by you having no trust in me," you teased, insisting, "I know whatcha need, baby, lemme help."
Carmy smiled softly and held still, letting you run your hands through his curls to push everything back and away from his forehead in a stylish but manageable "do". There was a silent, serene moment as you and Carmy just existed together in a mundane space, his big, sad eyes watching your face as you worked. He wondered, "Think tonight's gonna be okay?"
"I think tonight's gonna be more than okay," you assured softly. "I think tonight's gonna go better than you're anticipating."
He sighed and planted his hands on either side of you, suddenly dropping his gaze. "I, uh... Sugar invited Mom t'tonight..."
"Yeah, I know."
"You know?"
"Sugar and I are still friends outside of us dating, Carmy," you smiled patiently, slowing your hands so you more toyed with his curls; pushing some strands behind his ears. "She needs someone as much as you do and I don't mind."
"But isn't that what Pete's for?"
"Yes, but you know, Pete's Pete."
Carmy snorted, "Yeah, yeah, good point."
"I don't know if she'll show up tonight, Bear, but whether she does or doesn't, it won't matter - you're not doing this for her. This is for you, Carmy, tonight's about The Bear opening - it's about you and this incredible, amazing thing you've done. Okay?" You caressed both his cheeks in your hands so he could only look at you directly. "If she shows, that's great," you whispered with a soft smile as your thumbs swept the apples of his cheeks, "and if she doesn't, it won't make tonight any less special. That, I can promise."
Carmy's forehead met yours, both pausing to breathe together; peace always a fleeting feeling as of late and being something you both capitalized on. You brought him in closer for an embrace, his face burying in your neck as your arms snaked around his to keep him as close as possible. His arms were tight around your waist, legs spread to accommodate him; both needing the feel of being close before that night's inevitable stressful event.
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"Wow, well, don't you look all pretty! Wow, Peach," Pete greeted you when you scurried to the table with your friend in tow. "Oh, hi there!"
"Pete, this is my best friend, Danielle, and Dani, this is Pete, Sugar's husband."
"Hi, it's really nice to meet you," your friend greeted, the two instantly chattering as they both just blew past their introductions to instantly compliment one another's clothes. You smirked, knowing they'd get along famously, and looked around the brand new, packed restaurant.
"Hey, there she is, my pretty girl," Richie greeted smoothly, approaching your standing form to slide his hand around your shoulders.
"Hi, Cousin," you beamed, offering him a hug in greeting. "The place looks fantastic - it's so - I mean - just wow, Richie," you complimented. "You guys did such an amazing job. I need to tell Fak, too, this is - you guys should be so proud, it looks incredible. Hardly can believe what it was before this."
"It really is something, huh?" He grinned. "Hey, Pete," he nodded.
"Hey, Richie."
"And you must be the famous, the fabulous Miss Danielle?"
"That's me," your friend grinned. "You're Richie, right? Carmy's cousin who's not really a cousin but is as good as blood?"
"Yes, ma'am, the very same," he nodded with pride. "We've some drinks coming your way in just a moment, but I need to borrow Peach for just one second."
"Why do they call her Peach?" Dani asked, but Richie was leading you away as Pete was heard answering,
"Oh, because she mastered this peach cobbler with Carmy's mom, Donna, and she started the nickname..."
"What's wrong?" You asked softly with a smile as to not give the illusion to others that you were worried. "What can I do to help?"
"No, no, nothing too bad, you were just requested by the Frenchie-French guy."
"Oh, right, that's right, yeah, I can help with that," you sighed gently, smiling as you approached the table. Greeting the two men and women was easy, Richie impressed by your connections in the professional world. Tonight, The Washington Post didn't just dine with them - no, it was also the director of social media for three luxury, designer brands: Jean-Paul.
Yes, the man was so elusive that he just went by Jean-Paul. Fuck a last name!
Either way, it impressed Richie to hear the introductions. The two women were executives in their own companies, names Richie didn't catch because he was busy taking note of the way Mr. Frenchie-French was basically eye fucking you in front of them all.
"Well," Richie smiled stiffly, "tonight's incredibly special for us. In fact, uh, Y/N's boyfriend is the owner and head chef."
"Really?" Frenchie-French perked his brows, shifting his gaze over to you. "You always had a soft spots for chefs, non? For those who were versed in the culinary arts?"
"Well, mostly I appreciated a man in the kitchen simply because I burn water and would probably unintentionally starve myself," you teased easily, deflecting the man's subtle dig. "I'm actually here with family tonight, so, please, ladies and gentlemen, enjoy tonight - I know I'm biased when I say the food is exceptional, but I look forward to your own opinions."
"We will talk later, mon cher, I am sure there will be plenty to discuss," the Frenchman promised, kissing the back of your hand as you let Richie lead you away by your free hand.
You released a long sigh, muttering, "Bring them a bottle of real champagne, please, Richie, I had a few bottles imported just for them. Listen closely," you lowered your voice as you both paused on the side of the dining room, "bring them a bowl of thin sliced strawberries sprinkled in sugar and pop the cork at their table - it's impressive for whatever reason."
Richie pecked your temple and gave you a tight squeeze, "I got it all covered, girly. You all right? Look like you're gonna be sick?"
"Just men being men grosses me out, I guess," you sighed with a small shrug. "He's always had a thing for me, I figured I'd use that to get him here tonight - Carmy's work speaks for itself, but maybe he'd be inclined to publish an article or two for us if I play nice."
Richie paused you a few feet from your table, complimenting, "I hope Carmy knows he doesn't deserve you, Peach."
"You said years ago neither of us did," you smirked gently. "Said I wasn't relationship material, right? Remember?"
"I was wrong," he nodded. "I even said y'all would never be serious, but..." He scoffed to himself, "I've never seen that boy so crazy about anyone in his life. You've really changed him, Peach. I don't really know how to thank you."
"You can start by buttering up those flirty Frenchmen," you teased, giving his cheek a peck.
"On it," he winked, parting from your side.
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Inside the kitchen some twenty minutes later, Richie approached Carmy, directing his attention, "Cousin?"
"Yo."
"Peach is on 17 with Pete."
"Okay."
"Go say hi."
"Yeah, eventually," Carmy nodded absently, never halting his work.
"Eventually?" Richie repeated with distain, something in his stomach twisting.
"Where the fuck is Josh!?" Carmy called into the kitchen, another chef echoing his concerns.
"Yo!" Richie barked as calmly as he could, "Just go say hi to your girl, Cousin."
"Yo, I'll go when I have a minute," Carmy deflected strongly. "I'm in the fuckin' shit, leave me the fuck alone."
"What? I'm saying - "
"I'll get there when I can get there!"
"I'm saying!"
"What?" Carmy barked.
"She's got important fucking people in that dining room, man," Richie scoffed, hands held up in defense. "Just for your ungrateful ass! Maybe the least you can do is go say fuckin' hi - even if you're fuckin' busy. She knows that, it'd be a nice gesture - or whatever fuckin' shit - I don't know! She's your girl!"
"Yeah! Exactly!" Carmy barked. "She's my fuckin' girl, she knows the fuckin' drill, I'll go say fuckin' hi when I get the fuckin' chance, Richie! Fuck's sake! Always tryna meddle and shit!"
"Jesus, fuck," Richie sighed, turning out of the kitchen with his hands waving Carmy off in defeat.
You were none the wiser, entertained by Pete and Dani's gabbing as Sugar was in-and-out, dealing with all the little things going wrong. These little things came to her in the form of notes left at the table subtly for her to go solve, you wanting to help but being shot down every time. Eventually, Carmy was approaching your table with a tray of food, shocking you slightly.
"Hey, Peach," He greeted softly, lowering the tray to balance on the table and lean over to kiss your cheek. "You look gorgeous, baby, wow," he complimented in a whisper, offering another quick kiss.
"Thank you, Chef," you smiled brightly, touching his forearm in a sign of affection. "What's all this you've got for us?"
He hummed and explained what he set on the table in front of you guys; eyes alight and cheeks flushed from the heat of the kitchen. He poured whatever sauce came with the main dish, smiling at Dani, nodding to Pete, then looking to you.
"I'll check on you later, all right, baby?" He mumbled, watching you nod. "I gotta get back," he whispered, "but thank you for being here, my pretty girl."
"No where else I'd rather be, Cream," you rushed, letting his lips find yours briefly.
"Stick around after, would you? When we close, just... Don't leave yet."
"Yes, Chef," you whispered against his lips with a grin. He gave one single more kiss before pulling away to stand upright.
"Enjoy," he bid the table before walking away.
"So, like," Dani trailed after making sure Carmy was out of earshot, "when's the wedding? 'Cause that might've been the cutest thing I've seen. I mean, opening night, he's cooking, but paused to come serve us? Serve you? And he's so soft with you, kissin' you, bein' all cute," she pouted dramatically. "I want a reason to wear a maid of honor dress, please."
"Hey, hey, chill on us. There's no wedding," you sighed with a small laugh, trying to play off how the subject made your stomach twist. "We haven't really talked about it, you know? No biggie."
"What?" She sputtered. "Wait, hang on. Y'all have been together - like - a stupid, ridiculous amount of time. The fuck you mean you haven't talked about it? What are y'all doing, just ignoring the elephant in the room?"
You shrugged lightly, "I don't know, we know if we ever got married, it'd be to each other, but that's really it. We know we want to be together, we know we want to marry each other, but there's been no serious conversation about it."
"Uh, does that sound right to you?" Dani asked Pete.
He shook his head as you all took dainty bites of food to savor the flavors (and save Sugar some). "When I knew with Natalie, I didn't hesitate."
"Well, Carmy isn't like you, Pete," you defended. "He's got a lot on his plate, too, you know?"
"You've said that since Mikey," Dani frowned, her voice quiet.
"With good reason, don't you think? Carmy's just - he's just going through a lot right now and it's a challenge, you know?"
"No, it's more like Carmy's got the emotional intelligence of a fucking teaspoon!"
"Hey," you snapped, "that's not his fault, he doesn't know much better, so watch your mouth."
"He does with you, like... He knows better when he's with you, when it comes to you, Peach," Pete offered softly. "Look, maybe Danielle has a point - it is a little weird. I mean, you guys have been together, what? Six, almost seven years? Creeping up on a decade of just dating - that's a long time. And didn't you guys do that weird little half-dating thing for two years before making it official? Don't you think that's enough time to know if you want to marry someone, and then, you know? Actually marry them? Or at least ask them?"
"Sure, maybe to other people, but Carmy and I have never been conventional, so, I don't see why we need to start now."
Danielle scoffed, "Look, God love Carmy and everything, but you're just wasting time now. He needs to either commit or let you find someone who can actually love you like you deserve."
"Oh, and Carmy doesn't?"
"Wasn't all that long ago that you two took a break 'cause he called you clingy - and some other unsavory terms," Danielle shrugged. "Doesn't really sound like someone who loves you unconditionally - the way you should be loved."
You sighed and sat back in your chair, "I appreciate the insight, but Carm and I are fine. Okay? We've got years under our belts, we don't want to fuck up what obviously works for us so chill out on the questions, okay? I don't have answers to them."
Danielle and Pete shared a look before the man got up to excuse himself to the restroom. You and Dani finished your meals before sipping your wine, waiting for Pete, but Dani sighed, "This lady's been staring in here for, like, ten minutes already. It's freezing, doesn't she want to come in?"
"Hmm? What're you - ?"
"This lady on the street," your friend pointed over her shoulder towards the window her back was now turned to.
When you peaked out, you gasped lightly when you saw Donna Berzatto smoking a cigarette. "Oh, shit!" You stood from your seat, rushing, "Okay, so, uh, yeah - just - can you just sit here for a second? I have to go handle that."
"Who is it?" Dani wondered earnestly.
"I got it, Peach," Pete told you, passing by the table swiftly with a hand patting your shoulder to keep you at your table.
"What the hell's happening?" Dani asked. "Who is that?"
"Nothing, no one, it's okay, I think that's someone we know, just, uh, hang on a second? We'll be right back."
"Sure," she nodded in confusion, watching you get from your seat and follow Pete out the door onto the blistering cold sidewalk.
"Hey, Mama Donna," you greeted happily, arms crossing over your chest to protect from the wind. "Have you been inside yet? We saved you a seat and all, but isn't this - just wow?" You grinned, trying to encourage her to say anything about her children's hard work.
"Oh, no, no, not you, too, Peach, why are you here?" She groaned lightly, looking upset and close to tears.
"I'm here 'cause of Carmy? I-It's opening night, yeah?" You offered in confusion. "Why? What's wrong, Mama D?" You worried, glancing at an emotional Pete.
"No, it's just, I can't come in, I can't, just no," she backed away, only now making you notice the way Pete cried. "I'm so sorry, Peach, honey, but I was never here. Okay? I-I'll call them later, I swear, I promise, I'll call them - but I-I-I wasn't here. Okay? You can't tell them I was here. I'm so sorry."
"Donna, don't do this," you begged, head shaking. "Don't, please. Just come in with Pete and I - just sit there for a bit. Just come in and see what your kids have done - Donna, it's so beautiful. You'd be so proud, but you should really see it for yourself - "
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I can't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, not tonight, no, I'm sorry, I can't," she deflected in a rambling mumble, turning and hustling down the sidewalk with her head shaking like a Etch-A-Sketch.
You rounded on Pete, "What the hell was that? Pete, what just happened?"
"Um, I-I don't - I didn't mean to."
"Pete? What didn't you mean?"
"She didn't tell her mom about the baby," he rushed, tears falling. "Nat didn't tell Donna, Peach, and I think I just did - I think I just fucked up and told her."
"Oh, no... No, Pete, you didn't."
"I didn't mean to! I swear it was an accident!"
"No, I know you didn't mean to, honey," you rushed, opening your arms to bring him in for a tight hug. "Oh, you poor boy, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Pete."
He sighed, "I'm sorry, too, Peach."
"For what?"
"That... We fell in love with Berzattos and this is our new normal now, right?" He sniffled.
You half-smiled, "Yeah, something like that. But it's okay. See, where Donna's afraid to give her love, neither of us are. Sugar and Carm deserve that from us, right? To be authentic and just love them?"
He nodded, "Yeah, you're right."
"And that's all we gotta do... Is love them, Pete."
"God knows where else they'd get it," he huffed, wiping his face. "Hey, um, I'll be in, in a second - I just need a minute alone, I think, in the cold."
"Take all the time you need," you agreed.
"We're not - we're not telling them about this, right?"
You sighed, "No, I don't think so - at least right now. It might hurt them more, you know? To know Donna was here, but never came in. That she ran away... Again. It'll hurt, they deserve to be happy about tonight."
Pete nodded rapidly, looking like he was gonna burst into tears. Instead of going back inside, you just moved to Pete's side and stood there; producing a cigarette, lighting it, offering Pete a drag that he turned down, and the both of you just standing silently; one smoking, one crying, both processing.
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"Wow, look at these gorgeous ladies! By far the baddest in the whole place! Yeah, man!" Fak teased as he approached you and Danielle after closing the The Bear officially. "What a privilege to have you both dine with us this evening! Ugh, truly an honor to see you both here," he praised comically, evening giving a small bow that his brother mimicked.
Your eyes rolled, "You're laying it on really thick when I already tipped you." He snickered with Theo. "Hey, seriously, though, tonight was incredible. I mean, it was all so beautiful, you should all be so proud."
"Oh, we are," Neil giggled, his brother hanging off his shoulders.
"Good," you teased. "Uh, is now an okay time to go back and see him? Kinda wanna offer my compliments to the chef directly, you know?"
"No," Fak answered instantly, "uh, well, probably not the best time."
"Yeah, probably not," Theodore echoed.
"I can sense you two ramping up to something," you sighed, "so, I'm gonna ask you skip all that and tell me what's wrong. Why can't I go see my boyfriend? He just had an incredibly successful opening night, I kinda wanna kiss him if you don't mind."
"Um, well, h-he didn't want you to worry, so, he said not t'tell you, but, uh... Yeah, no, Carmy's, like, locked in the walk-in freezer. Han Solo style."
"What?"
"Locked in the walk-in," Fak nodded rapidly, "yeah, no, the handle - like, the whole handle came off. He's locked in, Peach..."
"Oh, my fucking God," you breathed. "Are you saying he - he missed opening night? Neil!"
"Yeah, kinda... Well, sorta - I mean, technically, but - "
"Oh, Jesus," you breezed past them all.
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"Mmm-mmm, the fridge guy's name is Terry," Tina corrected Carmy, flinching a little when he slapped the other side of the metal door he was locked behind.
"See, th-tha-that's what I'm talking about!" Carmy raged. "I'm so fucking distracted, and for what? For fucking what? 'Cause of a girl?" He chuckled ruefully to himself.
"Nuh-uh, don't do that, Carmy," Tina scolded. "That's not no girl, that's your girl, that's Peach - you don't lash out at her, baby."
"Yo, maybe - maybe I'm just not built for this. Right? Maybe that's okay! Maybe that just is. She'd be better off, Tina... I'm just - I'm not built for this."
But what Carmy didn't hear was Sydney asking Tina to cover her at the front because she needed to step out the back, get some air; Tina accepting and telling Carm to hang on a moment. Something he missed. While Tina took Syd's spot, Syd rushed outside, and you slipped in the kitchen door; Carmy being surrounded by shitty ripped tape and an entire side full of the flowers he had brought in for tonight - for you. It was a haunting reminder; something suffocating.
When you got to the walk-in, you were prepared to call out for Carmy, but he started speaking from within, halting any word on your tongue.
"I wasn't here b-because I was looking a-a-at fucking engagement rings when the fridge guy fuckin' called," Carmy ranted, your heart stalling in your chest. "Right? Like, what the fuck was I thinking? Like I was gonna get married? Commit to this relationship? Be h-her fucking husband or some shit? Have a fucking wife? I'm a fucking - I'm a fuckin' psycho!" He laughed a little, the tears springing to your eyes as his words disarmed your heart and emotional dam. "That's why! That's why I'm good at what I do! That's how I operate! I am the best because I didn't have any of this fuckin' bullshit, right? I could - I could focus and I could concentrate and I had a routine and I - and I had fuckin' cell reception, and Peach and I just had our own routine! We didn't need this extra bullshit, and now..."
You just listened, leaning on the freezer's door, tears silently leaking down your cheeks as you had the horrendous realization that you were what now slowed Carmy down. You were what currently stood in his way, when this whole time, you thought you were helping; making things easier; supporting him. No... No, his words rattled your heart to accept that you were now the bane; the object of his ire. You and your relationship was what was wrong and was causing Carmy hurt and professional complications.
Something you never wanted to contribute towards. You both always said if this relationship got to be too hard, you'd walk away. Better to feel anger than resentment; and now, you knew you had to walk away else risk that resentment fester.
Carmy started up again, "I don't need to provide amusement or enjoyment, I don't need to be someone's 'to have and to hold'. I don't need to receive any amusement or enjoyment, nor for someone to have and hold me... And I'm completely fine with that. Because no amount of good is worth how terrible this fucking feels." You were ready to open your mouth, but he finished by nailing the final nail in the coffin of your relationship, "It's just a complete waste of fuckin' time - entertaining what I know I shouldn't. Being in this relationship, trying to give what I don't have, wasting everyone's time."
You took your chance, speaking through your tears, "I'm really sorry you feel that way, Carmen."
"Peach?" Carmy rasped from behind the door, sounding more alert than he had before. "Baby? Hey, hey, Peaches? That you? Peach - hey. Hey," he sounded desperate as you backed away from the door, a fist pounding into the metal, "hey, no, Y/N? Y/N!" The seriousness settled over you both, Carmen understanding you heard a lot more than ever intended and once those words are out there, there's no getting them back. "Y/N, baby? Hey, no, no, Y/N - listen to me - hey, no, no! I-I didn't know you were there, baby, okay? No, Y/N, please - tell me you're there now, let me explain." He paused. "Let me explain! Please! C'mon, baby, please, let me fucking explain - tell me you're still there! Y/N? Y/N!"
You sniffled and walked away, feeling smaller than you ever had in your life. You barely noticed when the kitchen door opened, not until a figured dressed in black stopped you. "Peach? Hey, hey," Richie halted you - taking note of the tears. "What's wrong? What happened? Are you okay - who fuckin' did it?"
You just stared at Richie for a long moment, opening your mouth twice before sighing and smiling sadly. "I never wanted to be what got in his way," you whispered sadly. "I'm sorry, Richie."
"Peaches, hey, what's - "
But you reached up to kiss his cheek, "Tonight was so beautiful, Cousin, and I'm so fucking proud of you all. Thank you for everything - not just tonight, Richie, but everything you do." You smiled again, whispering, "Take care of him. Okay? He'll need you."
"What're you talking about? What's going on? Where are you going? Hey, where are you going, Peach, please?"
"Have a good night, Richie, I love you," you whispered, leaving out the kitchen door as quickly as you could. "Hey," you sniffled, approaching Dani with the Fak Brothers, "can we go now, please?"
"Are you okay?" Dani worried in shock.
"I'd really like to go, Dani, please," you rushed, throwing your coat on and smiling at the Brothers as if your heart wasn't in pieces. "Thanks again for tonight, you guys, it was magical."
"Peach? Wait, hey, are you okay, baby? What just happened?" Neil worried, watching you snatch Dani's hand, but pause when screaming was heard from the kitchen. Everyone stared at the door, Neil muttering, "The fuck are they...?"
"Now, Dani, please," you whimpered to your friend, who wasted no time in escorting you out of The Bear. The moment you were outside, you burst into sobs, Dani grunting a little as she lead you down a side alley to lean you on a brick wall and beg you to breathe normally.
"What the hell just happened? Hey, honey, you need to breathe," she smoothed hair off your face - but it was like you were drowning in the air with the way you gasped and gaped and panted and whimpered and choked yourself.
"I-I-I-I think - I think w-we're done, I think we're done, I think - oh, fuck - I think we just broke up," you sobbed, hands on your knees. "Oh, my God, Dani," you whimpered, "I-I think - I think we're done, Danielle, oh, my fucking God. I-I heard things tonight that I just - I can't not know, anymore! He said - fuck! He was just so candid, he didn't know I was there so h-he was sayin' things I have t-to now confront - and I really didn't fucking want to! He just - he doesn't want to really marry me, D, and-and-and he was apparently looking a-a-a-at rings - fucking engagement rings! But then he said that w-was the issue - he missed the fridge guy's call 'cause he was looking at fucking rings for me and this is why he missed opening night - 'cause the fucking fridge broke! Oh, my God, Danielle, i-i-it's my fault, it's my fucking fault, he missed the most important night of his life and it's my fault - "
You were cut off by your stomach lurching, emptying your insides onto the pavement. The delicious appetizer, the tantalizing main course, Marcus' fresh baked bread that was delightfully soft on the inside yet baked crisp on the outside, and every bit of the sweetened dessert - all wasted on Chicago bricks.
"Okay, okay, ah, shit, just get it out, babe, there you go," Danielle held your hair, catching you in a suffocating hug once you were done puking. "I've got you, babe, I've got you. You're okay, no, hey, this isn't your fault. I've got you, come on. I think we need pints of ice cream and the saltiest pretzels we can find," she pushed some hair from your sticky forehead, pouting dramatically, "maybe some Pepto? Few Saltines and ginger ale? C'mon, we're going back to mine, there's a good girl," she coaxed you from the ground and away from the wall, "c'mon, you're stronger than this. There's my girl, here we go, just one foot in front of the other - together, with me, just like that."
You sobbed, not knowing that Sydney and her father stood listening just a few feet away behind a set of dumpsters.
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The moment the freezer's door was open and Carmy was free, he was sprinting around the kitchen to grab his coat, leave Neil in charge of closing, and racing out the door as the Fak Brothers yelled at him for hurting your feelings.
"Hey, hey, hey, Chef! Carmy, wait!" Sydney chased him outside.
"No time!"
"Wait! She went with her friend!"
Carmy came to a tripping halt, catching himself before he hit the pavement before whirling around to approach her, "What?"
"Her friend? She was with some girl tonight?"
"Yeah - yeah, yeah, yeah, uh, um, that's - yeah, that's Danielle," Carmy nodded. "Her best friend, yeah, they were here tonight, sitting with Pete and Sugar."
"Listen, Carmy, I heard them when they left the restaurant... Peach was really upset, like, more upset than I've ever heard, saying you two broke up? Or something? She cried so hard, Carm, she actually threw up, it sounded like she was in genuine distress. I-I didn't know if I should've intervened, but her friend was with her and helping."
"Shit - fuck - Goddamnit," he seethed. "All right, thank you - "
"I doubt they went to your place, I think I heard her friend saying they were going to her apartment."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, great, I know where Dani lives, thanks Syd!" Carmy bid, sprinting in the other direction - never bothering with the public bus system, just running into the night. Sydney was left to sigh on the sidewalk, Neil and Theo joining her before Richie followed - all watching Carmy disappear down the sidewalk.
"He's a fucking idiot," Richie shook his head.
"What the hell even happened?" Syd asked.
"Carmy mouthed off in the walk-in, Peach heard it all," Richie supplied. "You know the dumbass was gonna propose tonight?"
"What?" Syd blinked in shock.
"Yeah," Neil tacked on, "we had a whole plan and everything. Candles, soft music, flowers - there's a bunch of flower bouquets in the walk-in."
"I'm sure that was hard for Carm to look at," Syd sympathized.
"Doesn't excuse whatever he said," Richie snapped. "She looked devastated."
"She cried so hard, she threw up in the alley," Syd frowned.
"How do you know?" Neil asked.
"I heard her," the other chef frowned. "My dad and I - we actually both heard her."
"Jesus fuck," Richie seethed.
"I mean... Should we still set up?" Theo wondered to his brother. "What if they kiss and make up, like always? Carmy might still wanna go through with the proposal, right? You know?"
"Maybe," Neil trailed, looking at Richie.
"I don't fucking know," he sighed, hands on his hips.
"She thinks they broke up, I imagine whatever she heard was pretty nasty," Sydney frowned. "Think they'll really make up tonight?"
"Let's hope," Richie sighed. "That fuckin' idiot isn't gonna find anyone better than Peach. Fuck," he looked around the city street. "All right, fuck it, fine, let's fucking set up. Not like the jackass deserves it, but let's do it for Peach."
Neil and his brother grinned at each other, turning to hustle back into The Bear - leaving Sydney and Richie on the street. No words were exchanged, just silent shakes of their heads before they followed the Faks with the intention to help set up for a proposal nobody even knew if would still happen.
The cold night burned Carmy's lungs, but it was nothing compared to the feeling of suffocation he felt earlier when listening to one of your voicemails while trapped.
Your words were sweet as pie, as they usually were; a voicemail left when you were still at work, but feeling so excited to see him that night that you just had to call him. You reminded him of the adoration and love you held for him, relaying how proud you felt - and that you knew Mikey would be, too. You were always doing that, reassuring Carmy; and maybe that's why he felt so freaked out, he wasn't used to it. Even after almost 7 years together, he just wasn't used to what he didn't know he deserved.
Because Carmy didn't think he deserved anything remotely close to love, understanding, compassion, patience, and / or reassurance.
He had sobbed out loud as he locked his phone, not having the heart to delete your message. He often never did - he liked listening to your voice on long, hard nights; it brought him peace when the world felt too loud. He also kept whatever little notes you left for him, even going as far as to get a few of your hand-drawn hearts tattooed on his forearm. One for each anniversary you've shared together. He realized he never wanted to be without you and all his doubts and fear was him projecting his own incompetence towards this relationship; so, he locked his phone, he didn't delete your message.
The moment the fridge door had been opened, Carmy was out of there, shot off like a Roman Candle - your words of love and understanding still ringing in his ears as he was freed. He needed to apologize, and he needed to apologize right fucking now.
The whole run to Danielle's apartment, Carmy wasn't sure what to say to you; mulling over different ideas in his head. He tried to plan his speech, but the only thing he could think of was how much he loved you and that the ring in his pocket weighed a hundred pounds.
He pounded at Danielle's door. Carmy paced slightly as he waited, knocking frantically, and surely waking the neighbors - but that didn't matter. All that mattered was talking to you, something he was desperate to accomplish. When the door opened, your friend offered a stale look and shook her head, "Nope."
"Dani, please," he halted the closing door, "it's all a misunderstanding, I swear to God, please, just - let me try to fix this. Please, okay? I-I need her - I fucking need her and I have to fix this 'cause she's all that matters, okay? So, let me talk to her - please. Please, Danielle!"
"Yeah? The only thing?"
"More than anyone, more than anything - more than The fucking Bear, I swear to fucking God, Danielle! Just - Just one chance, please. I-I don't know how it all got so fucked, but please, I have to try - "
"Whatever you said in that freezer, Carmen, fucking gutted her, you hear me?" Dani stood in her doorway protectively. "Should've had your ass frozen for the hurt you caused her. How the fuck do you intend on making this right? Huh? It's been almost a fucking decade, dude, if you're seriously still afraid of commitment, just fuck off and leave her alone. Let her walk away 'cause I promise, there's a line of dudes who would love to put a ring on her loyal-ass finger - "
"Please, let me fix this," Carmy begged, sounding close to tears. "I need her, Danielle, please."
"It's okay, D," a voice whispered from behind Danielle, and when she turned, you were revealed - jacket and purse in hand, looking completely exhausted, drained, and disheveled. "I'm just tired, Dani, but we have to talk about this... So, I'll go home with him and call you tomorrow, okay?"
"You sure?"
"It's a decent walk, gives us too much time to talk," you shrugged, refusing to meet Carmy's bloodshot eyes. "Thanks for tonight, sorry I was such a mess," you whispered, hugging your best friend since pre-school.
"Girl, don't you ever apologize to me. But hey, look, I don't know, you were just drowning in your tears, like, five minutes ago. Sure you really wanna go? You can stay here as long as you'd like, girl, fuck him."
"Better to work it out now than later, I guess," you whispered, letting her kiss your cheek and see you guys out.
"She calls me cryin', Carmen, I'll kick your ass," She threatened as you moved down the apartment's hall. You might've snickered just a little, but the amusement was wiped clean when you rounded the corner and came up to the elevators.
Now that it was just you two, it was dreadfully awkward.
"Baby - "
"Just - don't talk for right now, Carmen," you sighed, shaking your head. "I'm still digesting all you said."
He frowned when you walked onto the elevator without a single emotion on your face, following you, and when on the ground floor, moved out to head home. It was quiet, it was awkward; only the sounds of traffic filling the space between you as you walked.
"Listen," he started with a long sigh, "you came in at the worst time, Peach, heard some shit you shouldn't have that I-I didn't even mean. I was just," he paused, sighing, "really angry and frustrated, fucking running my mouth 'cause I didn't know what else to do."
"Sounded like I came in at the best time since you're not very forthcoming with emotions. So, hearing your confession put a lot in perspective for me, Carm."
"I was just angry, Peach," he frowned, hands deep in his pockets. "Felt like I was self sabotaging myself, I wasn't sure what else to feel. So, I just lashed out. I didn't mean it, but I just felt like being angry... So fucking angry, baby, I just - I didn't know what else to feel."
"I don't know if I can be with someone like that," you whispered. "Someone who throws our relationship under the bus when he's angry, someone who's first line of defense is apparently to blame the relationship he's been in for over half a decade with the same girl. Someone you've known your whole life..."
"Peach - "
"If it's that easy for you to just disregard us, I don't think we should continue this."
Carmy took a breath and reached out to pull you to a stop. He dug in his pocket for a moment, then showed you the black velvet jewelry box. "I was gonna propose tonight, when everyone was gone," he explained when you took the box to open gingerly. "I think because that was on my mind already, something I was more than nervous to actually do, you're right, it did become my first line of defense to blame us - not just you, baby, but us. You and me... Mostly me, though," he chuckled sadly. "You're this perfect, sweet angel who just loves me out loud when I don't deserve it, and I'm... I'm just me," he sighed, eyes reddening. "And I know I'm never gonna be enough for you, I think I started to get in my head about if you said no. How I missed the call from Terry about the fridge 'cause I was picking out an engagement ring that you didn't even want, that you rejected - rejected me; and in turn, I missed opening night, and it all just - it got to a boiling point. Look, Peach, it's never been a secret that I don't think I deserve you... But I wanted to be the man that could at least give you an honest try of my best. You've stuck by me the past seven years when you should've ran for the hills, and I knew I wanted us for life years ago - but everything was still so up in the air. So confusing. So fucked up. I figured, after opening tonight, if things went t'plan, I could propose - prove to you that we're on our feet and there weren't any rugs to be pulled."
"What if things didn't go to plan?" You whispered.
"We're kinda living it now," he admitted, hand rubbing the back of his neck. "But even if tonight was all a total failure, I know I might've still done it because it's you, Peach. It's you... I've known for years you're who I want, I just never knew how to do this - to move us forward. You're my first relationship, hopefully my only relationship, and I just didn't know how to advance us. I think when things got real for me, my insecurities crept in, and I just reacted - I didn't think."
"We always said when this wasn't healthy or when this wasn't good for us anymore, we'd walk away," you reminded. "That we'd rather be sad or angry about a breakup instead of letting resentment fester from being together."
"It's still good for me, Peach, we're still good," he whispered, stepping closer. "Is it still good for you? Or did I lose you completely tonight?"
"I don't know, Carmy, you've been lashing out a lot lately. At me specifically."
"And with The Bear now open, I-I should be okay. You know? Back to normal?"
You chuckled dryly, "I see, back to your high walls? Emotional constipation?"
"Then maybe not normal," he corrected, "because I just needed to get us here, to tonight, to opening, and then show you that it's over. Show you that part of our lives is over and we only have more adventures to look forward to. Not ones like this, though," he gestured up the street, your eyes cutting over and realizing you were back at The Bear.
"Do you really think you're a psycho?"
He chuckled, "After tonight? Yeah, pretty convinced... Plus, I, uh, I saw in the freezer the way we're labeling things - and got angry about it. Angry about the way we were tearing tape and labeling things. It was so fucking stupid, but I just - I felt so crazy. I still do, I still feel like my head doesn't make sense and I'm a bit, you know... Crazy."
You nodded slowly, "Then how can you promise me this kinda shit won't happen again?"
"I don't think I can, but I can make you the promise that I am working on it; trying to identify when I feel reactive, trying to calm that down. I'm trying, Peach, I really am - it's just... Taking a lot of time," he sighed sadly. "And I know you don't have any more left to give me."
"I've already given you this many years," you reminded softly, "I think I could spare another or two if it meant you getting your shit together, that you get better, stop feeling so crazy."
"I don't deserve anymore time - "
"I think you need to step back and reevaluate what it means to be deserving because you always say that. That you don't deserve something - even as simple as time. Everyone deserves time and opportunity to figure shit out, Carmy, and you're no exception."
He nodded, "I'm... Trying." He took a long, deep breath, "I'm, uh... Going to meetings, you know, like, uh, Al-Anon and whatever."
"That's good, they're there to help," you nodded, stepping closer to take his hands in yours after closing the ring box and stuffing it back in his pocket. "Now, I think you need to do something."
"Anything, Peach."
"Take my hand, bring me back to The Bear, and go about your plan."
He froze in shock, blinking at you in earnest, "You really mean that?"
"Do I look like I'm joking?"
"No, ma'am, and I think that scares me more."
"You'd rather break up? 'Cause at this point, Carm, we either move forward with this engagement and fucking work our shit out, or we break up. It's been almost a decade. It's your choice, you're the one who was saying he couldn't be someone's husband, that he didn't need to provide anyone nor have them provide you with anything. So, you tell me what you want to do - because all I know is that I love you, I want you for life, but not if you're going to resent me and regret moving our relationship forward. I don't need to get married, Carmy, but you can't keep jerking me around like you have been. So... Make a decision based on what you want - based on what's best for you. Not what's best for us, but put yourself first right now, Carmy, and make a decision about what you want."
With a nod of his head, Carmy cleared his throat and offered you his hand. When he felt you lock your fingers with his, he glanced up and down the street, then lead you across it. Up the sidewalk and to the front door of The illuminating Bear, he paused to produce his keys and then lead you inside.
The lights were dim, but a flip of the switch brightly lit up the newly constructed restaurant. He seemed nervous at your cool demeanor, watching you shed your coat and set your purse down; but his hand took yours again and lead you further into the place. He seemed nervous, but once in the kitchen, it was almost like Carmy's stress melted away.
"I was... I had this plan," he explained softly, leaning on one of the work stations with both hands in yours to keep you in front of him. "I have all these candles, right? Was gonna distract you in here," he looked around the fluorescent lighting, "while Richie, Fak, Tina, and the others set everything up. We'd hang in here after the place was closed down, you know, show you around the completed kitchen. And really casually, I'd ask if you were ready to go, so, we'd go out the front, and we'd walk right into the candlelight..."
"Yeah?" He nodded, thumbs running over your hands as he pushed off the counter. "Don't deviate from your plan now..."
Carmy smirked, "Wanna hear the boring kitchen stuff?"
"Of course, I do."
So, he lead you around in a tour of the kitchen; showing off the new office space that he invited you to take advantage of whenever you wanted. The sleek appliances were shown off, the vast fridges, freezers, new cutlery, state-of-the-art dishwashers. Everything, he showed you, knowing you helped him pick a lot of it out - it was still nice to see it all come together finally.
And then, slowly, he lead you out of the kitchen, but to your honest shock, the dining room was covered in lit candles and different bouquets of thick, gorgeous floral arrangements. "Oh, holy shit," you breathed, Carmy hiding his confusion much better than you.
You came to a slow halt in the middle of the room, the lights out and only leaving the candles to provide an ambiance. "I had this whole speech planned, too," Carmy told you softly. "Remind you of the day we met, how you saved me from those jackass bullies - remember?"
You smiled softly, emotions swirling in your chest, "First day of first grade, you had a Buzz Lightyear backpack and some kids were picking on you 'cause of it."
"And what did you do?"
You felt bashful remembering, but humored him by answering, "Pushed their faces in the mud at recess and made them apologize."
"You've been my best friend since that day," he nodded, bringing you in a few steps closer. "And when we got to high school, my feelings changed. You weren't just my best friend, but the girl I was madly in love with... Took me a couple years to buck up the courage to ask you out officially, though."
"Sure took your sweet time," you whispered with a smile, "but all good things to those who wait, right?"
"And I think you've waited long enough for a man to be who you deserve," he frowned. "All these years - it's been you at my side. You even - fuck - you even came over to Amsterdam for a bit because I was feeling overwhelmed and lonely. Sad, maybe even a little homesick. But you just - you just showed up like it was the most common thing in the world."
You chuckled through your tears, "Yeah, we had some good times on that boat, didn't we?"
He nodded with a softening smile, pushing hair from your face and behind your ear; pausing to hold your cheek carefully. "And when we came back stateside... You were still the only constant presence in my life. You were my family without blood, and I knew after that Christmas that you'd forever be my other half, and I'd spend my life conveying how grateful I am for you. I just - I never knew how to put it into words until now."
"What changed?"
"Realizing that I wanted to marry you years ago - and I should've. I know I shouldn't have drug my feet with us, delay our inevitable, because honestly? I couldn't see my life without you in it and I knew I needed you with me forever. Peach," he frowned, reaching for your other cheek, "we agreed when this wasn't healthy, we'd walk away - I remember that. But I need you to know, I'll never fucking regret you. I'll never resent you. You've been unwaveringly supportive and loving and... And I've been the luckiest man to experience it all. But now," he pushed himself a step closer so he was hovered over your lips, "I know that you deserve someone just as present in this relationship as you are. I knew once The Bear was done, I was done - I was done beating this bush around and wasting time. I knew what I needed to do because the idea of you not being in my life anymore terrifies me more than anything. I don't remember life without you, Peach, and I don't ever want to know what it's like. So," he cleared his throat, "here, in the restaurant I so desperately wanted to give up on so many times, but you always stopped me, I wanted to make this official. I wanted it to be here to show you that the past year of our turmoil - it's fucking over, Peach. We did it," he whispered, "and now, the next and only thing I want to focus on is us."
Carmy readjusted you both for a little bit of space, holding your left hand tightly as he lowered himself to a single knee; looking up at you with those big, wide, sad blue eyes that were growing redder by the passing second. The candlelight created a romantic atmosphere that cocooned you both in a warm embrace, the flowers around you projecting their floral scent.
"So, I need to ask you something real important, baby," he whispered, his throat bobbing to restrain his emotion that clawed up his throat, "because if I don't, I don't think I could breathe again." He cleared his throat, pulling the ring box from his pocket and opening it to present to you officially. "Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N... My sweetest Peach, I've loved you almost my entire life, you're my best friend, my most loyal and sweetest confidant. You make me want to be a man better than I was yesterday and never before have I ever seriously considered marriage - until you. Now? Now, I can't get the idea out of my head, so, my sweet girl," he took another breath, the tears in his eyes swelling and slowly dripping down his cheeks as you slowly got on your knees in front of him, "I need to ask you... W-Would you do me the honor? Of being my wife?"
"Carmen."
He grinned at you, both with tears down your cheeks. "Will you marry me, Y/N? I can't see my life without you in it, so... I want this, I want you for life. Y/N, will you marry me?" He paused, adding a meek little, "Please?" at the end.
With a deep breath, you slowly reached for his cheeks in a soft caress to wipe his tears; both just staring at one another for a good few moments before a face-splitting grin nearly cracked your lips. "Yes," you finally answered, "yeah, yes, yes, of course, I'll marry you, Carmen, yes!"
"Oh, thank fuckin' God," he laughed, letting you lunge forward to knock him backward in a hug - missing the candles arranged in a small circle for you two to stand in. Carmy laughed loudly, happily, giving you a tight squeeze as he mused, "Had my heart beatin' outta my chest for a second there, Peach."
"Oh, please," you laughed, "after all this time, you really thought I'd say no?"
He shrugged meekly, "Thought my most recent fuck-ups would've added to any reasons you might have to say no."
"Oh, spare me - you're my best friend, Carmy, you know I couldn't ever say no to you. Not without puking in nervousness."
"Can we maybe not talk about puke when we just got engaged?"
You laughed and nodded, "Fine, fine, fine, then put the ring on, please."
You presented your left manicured hand, watching Carmy almost giddily removed the band from the box, took a slow, deep breath, and then, the most beautiful ring was being slid onto your finger in an official show of your engagement. Of your undying love. Of your commitment, promises, and future together.
"YEAH!" An array of varying cheers and hollers of support and excitement rang out around you; startling both you and Carmy to look up. Richie, Sydney, Tina, Neil, Theo, Pete, and Sugar all hung in the bathroom's alcove - watching with splitting grins and cheering in celebration.
There was no time to question them as Richie lead the charge over; helping you to your feet for a giant, bear hug before gushing over your engagement ring. Neil and Theo popped one of the authentic bottles of champagne, pouring different flutes for those present.
"Calm down," Natalie scolded Richie lightly, "and move out the way, I want to hug my engaged bestie!"
You squealed with Sugar when her arms wrapped around you tightly, Rich moving on to congratulate Carmy - who apologized for his angry words earlier and thanked them for still setting things up. Richie promised it was for you, not Carmy, but still hugged the little shit with a laugh - indicating he was just joking.
"Let me see!" Natalie grinned, examining the ring Carmy chose and squealing again. "Oh, my God! Oh, it's so pretty! Oh, shit - sisters!" She gasped, holding your hands tightly, "We're going to be sisters - like, officially!"
"Sisters in law, but yeah, cupcake," you beamed at her, wiping your tears and giggling. "I can't - this just doesn't feel real," you told her softly, looking the few feet over to see Carmy with the lads as Sydney stood with you and Sugar. "Him proposing? I genuinely thought it wouldn't happen," you tried to laugh your nerves off, looking at your ring and fiddling with it.
"Yeah, right," Sydney laughed. "I haven't been around that long and even I knew this was gonna happen."
"Oh, please, she's right," Natalie grinned when you went to retaliate, "he first started talking about how he wanted to marry you when he was, like, 15. This has been the longest thing coming."
"Thank you guys for helping," you whispered with a smile. "It's all so beautiful."
"Happy to help for a good cause," Syd smiled, complimenting your ring as Neil called for a toast. Everyone was given flutes of champagne, Carmy's arm wrapping around your waist as each friend gave their own little speech, congratulating you both before the alcohol was being drained.
"Uh, and where are you two going?" Sugar asked about an hour later with a small giggle when Carmy wrapped an arm around your neck after helping you into your coat again.
"Gotta celebrate alone with my fiancé," he smirked, "later, guys! Don't forget to lock up!"
"Carmen!" You scolded with a small laugh, gaping at him.
"What? They got this," Carmy chuckled. "Thanks, you guys, see you tomorrow!"
"We can help clean," you told him as he lead you out of the restaurant.
"Nah, we've got bigger plans," he smirked at you. "Got plenty t'celebrate, yeah? Ever fucked as fiancés before?"
"No - but I hear it's some crazy sex," you whispered, locking your arms around his waist to stay close. Neither of you cared about the bus at this hour, opting to walk home in the cold - not that you felt it. Your love burned brighter than the cold biting your skin.
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requesting rules and masterlist
The Bear masterlist
1K notes · View notes
magalhaessims · 4 months
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THIRSTY CACTUS DINER - MAXIS-MATCH CC BUILD
Fresh and renewed! One of my very first builds, now with a modern twist! The Thirsty Cactus Diner is the ideal destination for those seeking a brief escape, where you can unwind and savor the perfection of a robust cup of black coffee. Also, I've just created my very first Speed Build Video on YouTube! If you appreciate this type of content, be sure to check it out. I hope you enjoy the video!
NOT CC FREE 
Lot Type: Cafe | Bar | Restaurant
Size: 30x20 
World: Oasis Springs 
Enable bb.moveobjects before placing in your game!
WATCH THE SPEED BUILD HERE
Origin ID: MagalhaesSims (remember to enable custom content on!) DOWNLOAD
CC USED IN THIS BUILD:
NOTE: For convenience, some of the CC is included in the Download Folder. Please put it in your Mods Folder along with the CC linked below.
Amoebae: GF Horizontal Slats & Vertical Beans | Vintage Dining Set | Plastered Style || AroundTheSims4: Diner | Paris (Bench) | Restaurant || AwingedLlhama: Nostalgia Living (Blinds) || Charly Pancakes: Chalk (Kitchen Clutter) || TheClutterCat: BubbleGum | Dandy Diary (Glasses) || Felixandre: Colonial | Paris | Soho || Harrie: Halcyon Kitchen | Klean | Spoons || HouseOfHarlix: Baysic Bathroom | Baysic || LittleDica: Delicious Kitchen | Greasy Goods | Rise&Grind | Summer Party || Max20: Cozy Bathroom | Dining Room Kit | Kitchen Appliances | Poolside Lounge (Plants) || Peacemaker-ic: Creta Kitchen (Mini Frigde) || Pierisim: Coldbrew | David Apartment | Domaine Du Clos | Pantry || RVSN: ShopChef Consumables || Simkoos: Clutter Dump || SixamCC: Private Schools (Fire Alarm) || SurelySims: Kitchen Of Tomorrow | Office Space || Syboulette: Crossfit Reborn (Wall Digital Clock) || Taurus Design: Lilith Chillin’ Areas: Coffee Corner || Zx-Ta: Painting | Retro Diner
The CC Sets above are the main ones I used to decorate this specific building and you can find all the links to the creators’ sites on my Resource Page. However, if you can’t find something specific, you can send me a WCIF and I’ll try to help you find it!
HOW TO MAKE IT FUNCTIONAL:
If you want a more immersive experience with this lot, I highly suggest downloading LittleMsSam’s Auto Employees Mod. With this mod, NPCs will automatically work at the lot, once you place the correct object for them to appear.
Make sure to read all the information available on the mods pages in order to make it work properly in your game!
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My content will always be free and right away available to everyone, but if you want to, you can show your support through my Ko-Fi Page. Your donation will always be much appreciated!
Credits: @pictureamoebae @aroundthesims @awingedllama @charlypancakes @felixandresims @harrie-cc @littledica @maxsus @peacemaker-ic @pierisim @ravasheencc @imfromsixam @simkoos @surely-sims @syboubou @taurusdesign @zx-ta @mmfinds @maxismatchccworld @s4realtor
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marvelmaniac715 · 7 months
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The Nerdy Prudes never really send the Lords in Black away again, so imagine if like… they just never leave and decide to attend high school since they ‘blend in so well’. Peter, Stephanie and Grace go back to school one day and suddenly, Wiggly (sorry, ‘Will’) is in a corner of the cafeteria trying to get people to sign up to the Marine Biology club he’s started because he has ‘a deep connection to cephalopods’. There’s Tinky (or ‘Terrence’) correcting the History teacher in vivid detail and sitting uncomfortably close to Peter, asking intrusive questions about his older brother Ted. There’s Pokey (or ‘Patrick’) overacting every minor role he gets in the Drama club and staging ‘unfortunate accidents’ for the rest of the cast of the school musical so he’s ‘forced’ to take all the roles and perform a stirring one-man rendition of ‘The Sound of Music’ (you should hear his ‘Climb Every Mountain’). There’s Blinky (‘Ben’) getting straight A’s in his film class because he never takes his eyes off the screen and notices every minute detail missed by the teachers. There’s Nibbly (‘Nova’) defunding the Home Ec department by devouring all of their ingredients and spending class time eating everyone’s work. Then halfway through the year Webby (‘Wendy’) decides to come to the school in order to save the students, but she is immediately and relentlessly bullied by her brothers who designate her as a ‘nerd’ (she’s had around twelve swirlies). Oh yeah, and they’re all on the football team, go Nighthawks!
Update: I’ve already added this in a reblog but just in case you don’t feel like searching, here’s a link to the in-progress fic I wrote about this, I hope you read and enjoy (I reply to every comment!) 😊💕:
Gotta Get Back To School (16915 words) by Marvelmaniac715 Chapters: 16/? Fandom: Hatchetfield Universe - Team StarKid Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Stephanie Lauter/Peter Spankoffski | Hot Chocolate Boy Characters: Peter Spankoffski | Hot Chocolate Boy, Stephanie Lauter, Grace Chastity, Wiggly | Wiggog Y’rath, Pokey | Pokotho, Tinky | T'noy Karaxis, Blinky | Bliklotep, Nibbly | Nibblenephim, Webby (Black Friday), Hannah Foster, Lex Foster, Miss Holloway (Hatchetfield) Additional Tags: High School, Post-Canon, Crack, Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, lords in black - Freeform, No Beta We Die Like Ted Summary: You know how the Lords in Black are summoned in Nerdy Prudes Must Die? Yeah… well, they never got sent back, so they’re still hanging around. Since they have time to kill and no plans that require urgent attention, why not stay in their human forms and attend Hatchetfield High as ‘regular teens’ just to mess with our favourite Nerdy Prudes? Go Nighthawks!
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magpie-murder · 6 months
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it'd be wild if they gave asgard's citizens phones in marvel i bet they'd have the best drama
20 notes
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👴🏻 is-odin-dead-yet
No.
#date: 2023/11/23 #when will he croak #i've been running this blog for centuries #frigga for allfather #kick the bucket already i'm getting bored of posting here
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⛈️ god-of-thunder
I come to Tumblr with a regretful update. As you may know, my family and our fiercest warriors have been traveling between realms in search of our stolen relics.
While attempting to recover one, my brother lost his life in battle while protecting us. He shielded me with his body. My brother died a hero.
einherjarl-deactivated20231120
May he reach Folkvangr. My deepest condolences. But I thought Baldur was impervious to all harm...?
⛈️ god-of-thunder
It was Loki. :( I'm devastated.
einherjarl-deactivated20231120
Oh.
🐍 magic-theatre
is that all you can muster? "oh." you thought i was dead, and that's it? that's all you have? what do you mean by that? let's talk. :)
⛈️ god-of-thunder
You're alive? Where are you?
⛈️ god-of-thunder
Wait, what happened to @einherjarl? He deactivated?
⛈️ god-of-thunder
Loki?
23,034 notes
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🎨 bragis-apprentice
Just finished custom making this handle
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#metalwork #artists on tumblr #double sided axe #my art
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⚔️ aesir-warrior-tournament
⚡️LIGHTNING ROUND⚡️
einherjarl-deactivated20231120
?
einherjarl-deactivated20231120
Lady Sif is not one of The Warriors Three. It says it in the name. There are three of them. Not four.
Correct this.
✨️ the-dashingest
I voted for Sif.
🪓 valiant-festivals
I voted for Sif.
🔺️ grim-warrior
I voted for Sif.
✨️ the-dashingest
Wait, Hogun? But you didn't tell us you had a phone?
🔺️ grim-warrior
I don't.
#lady sif propaganda #lightning round #poll reblog #only one more round after this! #i'm so glad lady sif doesn't have tumblr lol #i hope you guys dont mind that a mortal is running this blog btw #i really didnt expect any of you to see this 😬 #and srry for the reblog spam #also hogun lol
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🐍 magic-theatre
i see your thirst edits, you sick freaks.
#start tagging me in them #and/or sending them to me
689 notes
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⛵️ modern-technologist Follow
umm i'm in ohio to visit my parents and there's like. um . a giant wolf running alongside my car? i'd call animal control but this thing is ginormous and i don't think that would do anything.
it doesnt have a leash or anything (obv its bigger than my car) but it's covered in chains. what do i do??
@identifying-d𝚘gs-in-posts ??
🐕 identifying-dogs-in-posts Follow
Fenrir Lokison?
#😨
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✨️ the-dashingest
I really don't think Loki is that bad. Sure, he's had a rocky history, but I don't think he's done anything worthy of scorn. Besides, hasn't he just died and come back or something like that, anyway? He has a blank slate, in my book.
#is it just me? #i hear people saying we should banish or kill him #i find that idea preposterous #he's just misunderstood
208 notes
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einherjarl-deactivated20231120
I'm not going to @ them, but ugh... Someone I'm acquainted with just died in battle, and honestly? I'm so relieved. Is that terrible? Don't answer that, I know that it is. I'll probably delete this in a few hours.
🐍 magic-theatre
that's what you get for vagueing.
cowards don't go to valhalla.
10,560 notes
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🔮 alchemist-aura Follow Sponsored with Blaze 🔥
buy my potions! i'm having a Thor's Day sale! you can get an invisibility concoction for only 3 gold today! cheapest prices in the market! don't let that einar guy force you to pay 230 gold for a wyvern tooth when you can purchase an authentic one HERE from my brand new online shop
#alchemists on tumblr #all natural potions #freelance potion seller #potion grinds #handmade potions #potionmaker #potion seller #invisibility potion #wyvern tooth #einar has competition #stay hustling 💪 #please check out my shop link i worked really hard on it #:) #:))
870 notes · View notes
pandoa · 5 months
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all i want for christmas is you!!
christmas & winter fluff headcanons with all of the twst characters!
~twisted wonderland x gender neutral reader~
(not so) mandatory christmas/winter special from yours truly <3 merry christmas and happy holidays c:
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♡— ace trappola pulls you into an ambush of snowballs along the sidewalks of the road as you two walk home on your way back from a days worth of work at nrc. the impact is sudden, leaving your cheeks turning cold the instant the sphere of softened ice hits your face. your eyes meet the twinkle in ace's eyes as he laughs mischievously and reaches his hand into the snow beneath him to conjure up another frozen weapon. he smirks with triumph as he grins a boyish grin that has your heart racing, excitement and challenge coursing through your veins as you turn to get your own snowball.
ace scoffs as you walk away, appalled that you decided to turn away rather than give him your attention, "what, can't handle that fact that i wo-?"
smack!
he spoke too soon.
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♡— deuce spade has a surprise for you. and it's killing him not being able to tell you. the surprise consists of a neatly wrapped box his mother helped decorate and a very, very, very thought-out script he'd been rehearsing since november. only the best for you, right? deuce has worked hard to put together your present, going so far as to ask cater for an online link to "cute gifts to give the person you're confessing to during the holidays" on magicam to try and help him brainstorm the perfect gift for you. with that and the knowledge he's learned from you regarding human holidays, deuce has managed to put together something he hopes will show you the words "i. like. you." in more ways than one. he just... really wants you. to like him back, he means.
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♡— cater diamond wears matching holiday pajamas with you. he sees it as it's trending all over the internet as cute couples with the same berry red plaid pajamas and matching black hoodies fool around on camera as they all dance playfully together, a memory he'd like to recreate with you. he ropes you into the silly tradition, stopping by your dorm to force coax you into the festive attire. you really have no say in this, and the ever-present phone camera pointed towards both you and cater prove it. you may not even be dating... but that doesn't stop him from persuading you to match with him in the name of you both being "cute for the holidays." in reality, though, he's having the time of his life right now as people in his comment section begin to assume that you two were truly a couple. it's not a crime if he doesn't correct them, right?
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♡— trey clover hosts a gingerbread house contest with you. and only you. the idea springs up when you mention the tradition in your world, and trey being the observant man he is, decides that it wouldn't hurt if you two both did it, too. it was well in his element anyway. there was no harm in hosting it as along as you seemed to be enjoying it. designating an entire day to first make the gingerbread from scratch, trey then promptly invites you over to heartslabyul to finally decorate separate houses of sweets. he gives you one set of gingerbread and the other to himself before starting a timer which will signal the beginning of your contest. may the best house win~
oh... what do you win if you do end up creating the best house?
trey will let you decide that :)
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♡— riddle rosehearts reads you sweet stories before you go to bed. it's after a long and chilling day as the weather outside prevents either of you from going out, making the both of you stuck to your own devices as you spend the day lazing around the dorm, cozying into your comfiest and warmest attire. you wrap yourselves into as many blankets as possible as you nuzzle into the plush cushions of the couch. riddle, whose face was a light shade of pink (whether that be due to the cold of the temperature or his a little closer proximity to you), then begins to recite a few stories he's memorized by heart as his voice lulls you into sleep. the evening grows darker and colder, yet you and riddle grow warmer and content as he finishes his story, realizing you'd fallen asleep, and softly smiles at you before making sure you were securely tucked into your blankets.
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☼— jack howl takes you to go see the beautiful lights of the holidays. at first, he acts indifferent to the festivities of the lights, not really paying them any special mind as he goes on about his day. but when he found out that you personally do find enjoyment in seeing the lights, he makes it his unofficial duty of taking you to see this custom. he asks you in the most awkwardly endearing way; his in denial tendencies showing as he refuses to admit that he's bringing you because, well, he cares for you.
"you like... to see the lights, right?"
"oh- no, i don't really care if we go see these or not. i can live without them."
"but you want to see them, so i guess we coul-"
"wait! i mean- no, i did not say anything. just shut up and come with me."
give the boy a break. he just wants to see you happy~
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☼— ruggie bucchi handmakes you a present. it's simple and adorable, although don't say that to him out loud. he knows it is, but... just don't admit it out loud, yeah? he begging you. ruggie works hard to make you this present, going so far as to start preparations weeks before he ever gives it to you. it wasn't too difficult to make, in actuality, it's just that he had made sure every detail was meticulously checked constantly for the best results. thinking of you that entire time making the gift, ruggie is eager to find out your reaction once you open the present. on the outside, he looks as if he really couldn't care less of what your reaction will be. but on the inside, the young man hopes that you'll come to like whatever his nimble hands have made for you.
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☼— leona kingscholar is a lazy man. but, sometimes, maybe lazy works out in your favor? you think about this as you and leona lay together in the comforts of the warm cushions of the couch you both had squeezed yourselves on, both laying horizontally as you tightly squished yourselves on the couch as if it were bed. leona lays next to you, his breathing slow and steady as he naps with his arm draped over your waist like a blanket. usually, you'd be pushing this man to wake up and get on his nerves for being so "lazy." but now, you find yourself relaxing as your head rests against his chest—feeling the warmth of his body radiating onto yours. and with the freezing snow falling outside, it was hard to resist this moment of peacefully cuddling the typically more arrogant housewarden. it was comfortable, and that was all that mattered.
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❋— floyd leech trades (purposefully) silly gifts with you. you both make a challenge for yourselves: whoever gives the most obscure gift wins. and both of you intend on beating the other. you really couldn't remember how the idea first started, though... all you remember is telling floyd of the traditions in your world and then bam. a brilliant idea struck both of your minds. the process is chaotic and strenuous, but the amount of "weird" items you and floyd find while searching is quite amusing. especially in sam's shop of wonders. but despite the laughs you share with him, this is still a competition. whoever out-sillies the other will win. the challenge is on.
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❋— despite the winter festivities taking place, jade leech decides to take you to a more... tropical celebration during the holidays. he brings you along to see the seaside as he pulls you into the clear waters of the ocean for a swim, the heat of the sun contrasting the the cold your other friends were probably currently experiencing. a holiday in the heat isn't unheard of, actually; you just didn't expect for jade to invite you of all people to accompany him, let alone with the trip only consisting you and him. he guides you into the slightly deeper side of the waters as his merform is now seen with you grasping his hands in the ocean. the cold water and heat of the island is a nice change of pace for once as you let jade take both of you wherever he wished, with you keeping your hold on his hand the entire time.
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❋— azul ashengrotto takes a day off from working to spend time with you, even if it was just for a day. with work constantly filling his mind, it's sometimes difficult for him to spend time with you outside of your visits to mostro lounge or the occasional spotting and waving in between classes at nrc. but! this time is different because today, azul makes it his goal to take work completely off of his mind as he makes his way to your dorm. mostro lounge should be perfectly fine without him for 24 hours... he left jade in charge, so he knows business is in capable hands. once he picks you up from your dorm, azul decides it would be more gentlemanly of him to let you choose a place for you two spend time at. anything. he needs to make up for all of those times he'd been so caught up in matters at octavinelle, of course.
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✰— jamil viper holds your hand in his as he places your hands in his pocket while you walk together. it's another cold day as you're all bundled up in cozy winter jackets when jamil notices you trying to warm your hands up by huffing warm air into your palms. after watching you do this a few more times, the young man walking beside you wordlessly takes your hand in his and gently places both his hand and yours into the fabric of his own pocket. you see him do this as a small flush of your cheeks adds to the already red tint of your face due to the cold. jamil makes no effort in acknowledging his actions, however, as he nonchalantly continues facing forward, ignoring the way you seemed to be left a little embarrassed but smiling by this simple gesture. but that doesn't mean jamil isn't also as equally as giddy as you. he just knows how to hide it better.
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✰— kalim al-asim shares a hoodie with you. and i mean, actually shares it. literally. as in, he climbs into your hoodie as you're still wearing it and innocently wraps himself around you, his face resting against the shirt you have underneath your hoodie as he uses you as some sort of blanket. the piece of clothing is oversized enough for both of you to fit in at the same time, so it was perfect. as kalim climbs in to join you, he cuddles himself against you as the warmth from both you and the hoodie engulf him, making him feel like a little woodland creature nuzzling itself into your pocket. it's just that... the pocket was much bigger, and much more closer against you. kalim finds comfort in this space with you, so you may be stuck there for a good while~
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♪— epel felmier wakes you up to the letters "i ♡ u" written in the pristine snow outside as you look at him from the window, smiling at him as he grins back at you. it's a little early in the morning at epel's home as you wake up to the sound of small snowballs tapping against the window. getting up from out of your bed to see what, or who, was throwing them, you're then met with the sight of a distant epel on the ground, waving up at you as he points to whatever he's written in the snow. your heart melts unlike the snow as you chuckle at what he's written using his footprints in the white snow, the gesture sweet as you see how proud he was with your reaction.
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♪— rook hunt sings and serenades you with holiday love songs outside of your dorm's doorway. they're love songs that you had taught him yourself, but that honestly just makes the moment much more romantic and lovely than it originally would have been. with only a guitar in his hands and a bouquet of flowers resting in the quiver strapped along his back with his arrows, rook begins to play you a few songs you taught him from your world, all of which centered around love and the holidays. what other things would make this moment more perfect? the young man also goes to write you his own song as he performs it for you, french both naturally and lyrically intertwined within the words of his song. once he finishes his serenade, he takes off his hat as he places it against his heart, lowering his head in a bow fit for a gentleman.
"my only christmas wish is you, mon ange."
this huntsman truly does know how to make a person swoon, doesn't he?
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♪— vil schoenheit subtly gives you a wink from the stage as he performs. with the winter season brewing, vil was set to perform for an event along with many other celebrities in twisted wonderland. he invites you along with other pomefiore students like rook to come watch as he sings and dances on the stage like a star you just couldn't bring yourself to turn away from. so obviously in his element, vil continues performing before he catches your eye looking at him from the audience and flashes you a quick wink. the wink was fast and fleeting, one second he was there glancing at you too, and then gone off to the other side of the stage the next. no one else had caught the sight of his wink your way as you stood there, concealing a smile as you returned to cheering and singing along as the image of vil smiling at you filled you with a certain type of joy.
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✤— idia shroud tries his best to keep you warm. walking through the chilly temperatures of the outside, idia notices how your body seems to shiver, causing the generally isolated housewarden to glance at you with a look of concern as you both continue to walk. he debates with himself whether or not he should offer his jacket to you, the idea itself just making him shrivel up in embarrassment. what was this? some cringey shoujo manga? his mind is in conflict with itself as you two walk side by side in silence with idia's expression growing more and more furrowed as he anxiously thinks to himself. minutes pass by with you still silently shivering until idia shakily places his jacket on you. welp, yolo, idia thinks as he avoids the way you look back at him from the corner of his eye, the embarrassment all too much for him.
yolo, indeed.
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♛— sebek zigvolt thinks he'd be good at ice skating. for one reason or another, you manage to challenge the boy at ice skating. and he proudly accepts. even though you both know that he has zero experience in skating. zero. it's amazing how you even managed to get this boy out of the rink without any fatal wounds as all he does on the ice skating rink is fall down rambunctiously and yell because he claims that you had another student "curse" the ice, causing him to fall down almost every two minutes. in reality, though, sebek just lacks any semblance of grace when it comes to the ice. he won't accept defeat from a mere human, however! no, no, no... you both will be staying there until sebek can successfully skate through the entire rink without falling! onward, human!
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♛— silver makes the true magic of the holidays happen as he uses his magic to make a reindeer fly, just like in the stories you'd always tell him about your world. he knows that, in your world, those stories are merely fictional, but he wishes to show you something beautiful during your time in twisted wonderland. so, he makes a few of his woodland friends fly as he guides you into the forest he typically spends his time in, showing you sights you'd never seen before as you both hop onto the back of the reindeer and see the world in an entirely different point of view with silver and the reindeer guiding you through the stratosphere.
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♛— lilia vanrouge catches you in a mistletoe "trap." you're completely caught off-guard as you search for him all over nrc after getting an ominous message from him reading only the word "help", making you rush through the entire school in search for your precious fae lover. you're speeding through the halls until the frightening, but still adorable, face of lilia suddenly pops up in front of you with a playful grin before promptly placing a light kiss to your forehead... all while he hung upside down as he held... what looked like mistletoe above both of your heads???
"i must say, (y/n), your world has very fun traditions. we should do this next year as well~"
you look at him at first with confusion until it registers in your mind as you see the familiar red and green plant in his hand.
wait. how did he get that in the first place-?
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♛— malleus draconia showers you with gifts. constantly. all throughout december, malleus manages to give you more gifts than you have ever gotten your whole life. and he doesn't stop either. you can't even comprehend how he found the time to find all of these for you... or how he hasn't run out of gift ideas just yet. your dorm is almost overflowing with gifts just from him as you sort through piles of items and wrapping paper, the dorm looking even more disheveled as you attempt to organize the chaos. the instant he found out about the "season of giving," malleus made all of the effort to do just that. give, and give, and give, and give... you get the point. and it's only for you, of course. who else would the fae prince use this much effort for? only you.
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a/n: i will rise from the dead whenever it comes to christmas
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xo-cod · 5 months
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would you write something about casual intimacy with simon please??🥹🫠
i'm in love with casual intimacy :") hope you enjoy babe <33 i couldn't pick one so i did a bunch but lmk if you'd like a specific scenario 🤍
rushed/ooc as usual.
affection and attention had been something the masked soldier had struggled with for years. he naturally had been closed off and reserved at the start, he didn't care much for intimacy having never truly finding it in his life. but when you entered his life, it'd all changed him completely
simon riley who disliked being caught in hugs and being squeezed, who grew to become incredibly uncomfortable and awkward around hugs and physical touch now came home from a long and hard day of work to actively seek you out and just collapse onto you in a heap, cuddling you close to his chest falling asleep on you. feeling as safe as ever between your arms
simon riley who was an incredibly observant man, who was known on picking up on the small habits others around him did even if they weren't aware of it casually and silently handing you glasses of water or food throughout the day because he knows you might tend to forget or you didn't have a good habit of remembering when to do so.
simon riley who had an intelligent yet busy mind, filled to the brim of placements on how to take down the target as efficiently as possible and how better to inflict the worst torture on his enemy carried space to memorise your coffee/tea order, making sure it was just the right temperature for you to drink and the correct amount of sweetener (or none) so you didn't have to top up
simon riley who everytime you both spoke couldn't help but fidget slightly with you purely out of love. who noticed everytime a strand had been out of place and delicately brushing it back as you spoke to him, continuing to listen intently but making sure your hair remained as perfect as ever
simon riley who was a natural born leader and protector, who lead his team along with price through countless battles and ensuring every last of his men came back to safety now couldn't stop protecting you no matter what. holding your hand securely with his fingers toying with yours or a gentle hand on the small of your back guiding you through the crowd of the streets, keeping you safe and close by at all times
simon riley who didn't laugh much through his youth or a fair share of his adulthood, never being able to find that connection and keeping to himself now gently nudged your calf with his foot under the table everytime soap and gaz did something stupid knowing it was funny but wouldn't give them the ego boost so he kept it to you solely. or his linking his foot with yours from the opposite side even if it was unknowingly because his body craved your warmth, some part of him having to touch you no matter what
or simon riley who was incredibly strong and who scoffed at the sight of couples, who thought he didn't need someone else now enjoyed resting his head gently on your lap whenever he had the chance. his fingers laced with yours as he brought the back of your palm for a soft kiss, still not used to the fact that you were his and he was yours.
simon riley loved different than most, initially he had been too worried to even reciprocate any feelings because he was damaged. some parts of his past couldn't be healed and he swore up and down he could never do to uou what his father did to his mother. some days were easy and others were hard, some days he sought out your touch other days he needed to be alone for a while to decompress.
but even in those silent moments, there was love.
he learnt that perhaps love itself didn't have to be made of grand gestures or explosive displays. it didn't have to be chaotic and mind numbing, it didn't have to be so terrifying and confusing. you were the anchor keeping him steady and grounded
love was made up of the little things and simon was so full of them, he might've not been the most romantic person in the whole world but he was always there and he cared for you in ways that couldn't fully explain himself. it took months of him adjusting around you, it took time to fully trust and let you in, to break down the walls that guarded his heart so fiercely but your life had intertwined so deeply with his, his heart was yours simply all along.
he thanked his lucky stars everyday when it came to you because he didn't have to pretend or make a charade, this love came easy. your love came easy and it wasn't for a price it wasn't something you snatched and dangled in front of him only to watch him fall and break. you kept him steady and in return, he cherished you well.
you truly were the other half to his soul <3
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